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nagarashi · 2 years

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I was just now thinking about how my recent rerun of kotor 1 and 2 came out ironic, in a certain sense, in terms of philosophy about karma...

Long post ahead)

It's worth starting with the fact that I'm the rare type of player who likes to play games with an evil alignment. The only exception is always the companions, to whom I am always loyal in spite of the worldview... And at one time because of this I got extremely strong emotions from the finale of kotor 1, when I had to kill half of my team because they refused to follow me (scene where you can force Zaalbar to kill the Mission is particularly evil, I really got a kick out of it the first time).

Then, of course, I went to the light ending to see what's up, but naturally I didn't like it very much...

Since then, I've loved the walkthrough for Dark Revan. In this case, I really like the dynamic between her and Jolee Bindo. Then his story of the young man and the snake, sounds much more interesting when you know how it all ends, you both know where it's going... love that old man, the only one I really don't want to kill in the finale. But the funny thing is having an romance with Carth Onasi. It's bloody cruel, and I do it every time...

You gradually build a friendship, even though he is bothered by your play with the dark side... He tells you how he was once betrayed, lost his wife and son because of that betrayal and war... And then you help him get his son back, wresting him from the grip of the dark side. Tender feelings begin to develop between you... And even when he finds out you're Revan, he still wants to be with you, trying to let go of everything that's been eating at him, because of the war that Revan started. And then this happens...

Revan has returned to her dark path and wishes to lead all her comrades down it, but... not everyone wants it, and those who do not want it, then they have chosen death. And so, you turn to him, to the one who saw hope in you... Carth. Betrayal again, but instead of anger and hatred, only an unwillingness to believe, a desperate blindness... Carth blindly hopes that there is still light in you, he cries out to you, begs you to return to him, believes that you still have a chance to be happy...

Even after the battle with Malak, after the defeat of the Republic at the Star Forge, when Revan personally slaughtered her own former mentors and began the end of the Order, even at the threshold of the end, Carth, still desperately believes that he can bring you back to the light, back to himself, because he loves you...

But all you do is stare at him indifferently, as if someone forgotten, a stranger, in your heart already too dark... Naive, stupid and blind, a foolish boy in love... If he is not willing to follow you, then this love is destined to die by your hand... along with Carth. The curtain...

Then I started kotor 2, and in this walkthrough I suddenly got an outcome that I had been able to get around before, because I knew the conditions for it. But this time, something went wrong... I still don't understand what.

You met the charming scoundrel who stole your Exile's black heart... and unlike Carth, he was far less innocent... and was ready to fall into the darkness behind you, no matter how dark that abyss was... And in the aftermath you learn that his silly smile is only a mask to hide his hatred, that his wounded soul and heart are terrible and black... Yet you close your eyes to it, forgive him all the lives taken by his hands, help him to seek atonement, let him protect you... You let him come closer and closer to you, you hold him close to your heart, not even afraid of the way his voice still warms from the killings...

And all would be fine if not for the appearance aboard the Ebon Hawk of a naive and kindly Disciple who would also become your apprentice. It causes fear and overwhelming jealousy in Atton's soul that the Exile would rather have this good-hearted, sinless hero who literally worships his mentor... Anger eats away at him day after day, paranoia makes him watch when you and Mical are together, causing the black beast in his heart to awaken from its and torturous sleep...

And then in the finale, when passions are running high, at one point Atton suddenly disappears... disappears, only to reveal himself to you as the one he desperately wanted to bury within himself, to forget... But he lied to himself, he cannot escape the bloody past, he cannot find atonement, he has fallen too much... And at his feet is Mical, killed by him, whose death has completed the rebirth of the old murderer.

And there he stands before you, pale, cold, indifferent, his gaze devoid of life, his voice drowned in silence. No matter how much you call out to him, no matter what you say, Atton is deaf, he has sunk into a darkness where no light or sound reaches, leaving only place for an emptiness of ignorant satiety... Does he see you? The one he fell in love with at first sight, the one he was willing to die for... Or is he facing just another Jedi? Another victim for his cruel pleasure... Does he remember you?

He doesn't hear your plea to stop, doesn't remember the way you smiled at him...

He attacks you, and it doesn't even matter why... it doesn't matter anymore when his body falls dead at your feet...

I guess it's not hard to grasp the parallels I got. Only with the difference that in kotor 2 the game essentially put me in Carth's place and now I wanted to save someone who was dear to my Exile, but alas, it was too late... As for Carth clinging to his hopeless love for Revan.

It was extraordinary...

Karma, you evil bitch)

P.S: Well, it's just that this song reminds me of this whole situation)

#star wars #kator 1 #kotor 2 #f!revan #carth x revan #carth onasi #atton x exile #atton rand #exile #dark side #darth revan #my fanart

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howtheworldcouldb · 3 years

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A Rough Guide to KOTOR Characterizations

Listen, everyone is a caricature of like one characteristic/Vibe. Remember the vibe and you're golden.

Bastila

Recovering teachers pet with religious trauma. Was the "Gifted Kid" who let it go to her head. Insecure as shit, hides it with arrogance. Seeks validation and support like a kicked puppy.

Prim, proper, talks over people to lead in group projects, lil arrogant, goes the "holier-than-thou, this is beyond your understanding" route when threatened. Struggling to see things outside of black and white. Neglectful parents vibes. Just needs a fuckin hug, my dude. And therapy.

Insecure -> prim, condescending

Carth

"My defense mechanisms are defense mechanisms." Constantly defensive. Threatened? Lash out. Don't want to answer a question? Lash out. Man finds a cause and then he's ride-or-die, this cause is Right, Loyalty is My Middle Name. Closet romantic. As soon as he's given the opportunity to love someone romantically, he pulls out his lil book of cliches and goes through them like a checklist. Strong moral compass.

He's also the dude in the horror movie that questions everyone's bad decisions, but only in like select situations. Carth when faced with a specific situation? On the money, every time. Carth when faced with the trash fire that is his own life decisions? Just gets in the can and claims it’s fine.

Stubborn, defensive, loyal

Mission

"Fuck you, I can do it myself. I don't need your help." Street kid who both seeks adult stability and would rather die than be seen as a child. Really wants to not have to constantly take care of herself but is terrified of what it means if she stops. Also pretty defensive. REALLY sensitive about her age.

Spunky, defensive, fundamentally scared

Jolee

"I'm too old for this shit." He's here to watch you fuck up, because he's got nothing better to do. Trauma, but mostly made his peace with it. The only one with some common sense, which in this galaxy translates to "pretty fucking wise". Can't stand the smell of bullshit, and will call you on it. Does not matter the context. Social niceties? Fuck 'em, who has time. Crotchety old man who speaks in weird riddles because he genuinely does not care if you understand.

Down-to-earth, tired, crotchety, irreverent

Juhani

Lesbian who came out to her emotionally abusive parents and got kicked out. A kicked puppy with latent anger issues stemming from trauma. I repeat, again, an abused puppy. Think Tatooine Slave Culture but with Anakin's problems. A little feral.

Self-deprecatory/berating, anxious, deferential, hurt and hiding anger

T3-M4

The little boy who's backyard pressed up against yours who was your adventure buddy for a summer. Sane friend on the surface, until he pulls something batshit and you realize that sane is relative. He's the one running around quietly getting shit done while everyone else argues on the proper way to go about something.

Cheerful, loyal and affectionate, helpful, a little frustrated, imagine if someone had to communicate through charades 24/7

Canderous

Also does not have time for your shit. Values are on violence, weaponry and to a lesser extent, honor. He's a bounty hunter, man. He's got a moral code but it is absolutely not based on similar tenants to yours. His one response to Revan massacring his people was "It was glorious", and that pretty much sums him up. Competent, violent, and with some fucked up morals, but still cares in an odd way. Pretty unconcerned about most things, a little feral. Everything can be solved with violence if you try hard enough.

Violent, caustic/rough, weird honor code, unconcerned

Zaalbar

The one dude in the group project who doesn't want to be there and leans against the wall watching while everything goes to shit. Loyalty is to Mission above all else. Taciturn and distant, but will honor a promise or vow to the end of his days.

Reserved, unsociable, loyal

HK-47

A violent psychopath. Humans are below him (replace any names with "meatbag"). Literally would murder you in a second if given the opportunity, and would like to take said opportunity whenever possible. The only thing stopping him is the fact that Revan said no. Will still gleefully describe it in detail, though.

Murder and property damage

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allronix · 3 years

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Carth and Force Sensitivity (crossposted from Reddit r/kotor)

This is for @k-she-rambles:

Okay, so while we're shooting the bantha crap over on KOTOR fan theories, u/134340Goat mentioned my all time favorite "Have you been chewing spice?!" fan theory when it comes to KOTOR: Is Carth Force Sensitive?

So this one starts with a story. I mentioned my brother in law, who is pretty much Keeper of the Jedi Archives. Seriously, he's an English teacher and my sister is a librarian. They met at a sci fi convention and their first date was Phantom Menace. We're taking not just geeks, but geeks who can throw the damn bookshelf at you. Brother in law bought KOTOR on the day it launched and turned it into a week long binge watch at his house. And because brother in law is that kind of geek, he's translating the characters into the West End D6 system. I'm watching him do a playthrough, and he's got Canderous and Zaalbar at Ajunta Pal's tomb.

Allronix: Huh. That's odd. Why aren't commenting on anything when Ajunta is speaking?

Bro in law: Oh. They can't even see Ajunta. You have to be Force Sensitive to see a Force Ghost The stronger your Sensitivity, the better you can see it.

Allronix: Really? Then how come Carth can see it?

Bro in law (gets the "holy shit, I gotta confirm this" look): Really?! He just sees something out the corner of his eye or something?

Allronix: No, he sees Ajunta just fine. Understands what the dude's saying too.

Bro in law instantly rolls back to his last save, swaps Zaalbar for Carth, and sees the bit in question.

Bro in law: Oh. Dear. (Goes over to make some quick scribbles on Carth's character sheet)

Okay, so maybe that was a lore fail. I didn't really think about it too much until I hit that False Level Up glitch and ran around with Carth and Mission as Sentinels. Now, while I couldn't really see Mission as a Sensitive, that little bit with my bro in law nagged at me. And became a "once you see it you can't unsee it." Apologies to TV Tropes, where some of these were my additions to the Wild Mass Guess entry on this topic.

Any one of these on its own is pretty easy to blow off. After all, man is career military, and knows All this Shit is Weird. I also like to think of Sensitivity as a spectrum and not a switch. If all life is connected by the Force, then all life would be Sensitive to some degree or another. It’s just a matter of to what degree. It’s only as the list gets longer and longer does the case start looking damning...

What are the odds of surviving that attack on the Endar Spire, getting to the escape pods, sharing the last escape pod with the mindwiped Sith Lord, piloting through the chaos, landing in what passes for the "good" part of town, remaining uninjured, pulling the badly injured mindwiped Sith Lord from the wreck, evading Sith detection while all this is going on, and just happening to find a dump of an apartment where the landlord's not asking questions? That is one amazing string of coincidences and good luck. Get that many in Star Wars, and it's definitely The Force sticking its nose in things.

Piloting the escape pod to land in the Upper City, piloting the Hawk through the Sith Blockade of Taris, the random Sith patrols, the escape from the Leviathan, and the fleet around Lehon along with the crash landing that left the ship easily repairable. Now, compare to Atton who we know to be an excellent pilot and drawing on The Force who still manages to crash the ship at least three times.

He's a scary good judge of character if you're interacting with other NPCs. If you watch him with other NPC characters, he's got a pretty good compass as to which characters are being helpful and which ones are full of shit. The only one he calls incorrectly is Rukil, who is probably also an untrained Sensitive (the age, the "marked" comments) and half senile, which is probably throwing him.

Related to that, his distrust and wariness about something not adding up with the PC, the Jedi Council feeding the party a line of bull, that things just aren't adding up. And on all of it? Dead on. He's 100% right about the Player Character, he just expected something a little less crazy than "that's Darth freaking Revan."

If you play Female Revan, then Carth's the one who gets fried in the torture cages on the Leviathan. Saul comments how strange it is that Carth takes so much punishment and still remains conscious. Now, this is a low level thing, but in lore, Force Sensitives have drawn on it to keep them alive or conscious under duress. Explicitly, the first sign we got that Leia was a Sensitive when she withstood the Imperial torture droid.

Another of his scary ass judge of character feats? In the comics, Zayne (who is on the run from the Jedi, who framed him for the murder of his classmates) has a vision that Mandalorians are coming for Serroco. Saul? Laughs it off, throws Zayne in the brig. Zayne's own friends don't even believe him. Carth gets one of those creepy hunches and starts calling in "duck and cover" sirens as far as he can broadcast, which sends seventeen cities and millions of people heading for shelter. It saves their lives and Carth is called a hero for it. Armed with another hunch, he disobeys Saul (remember this is before Saul nukes Telos) and lets Zayne "escape" from custody. Mind you, not even the Jedi or his party members believed Zayne. Carth did.

Carth makes a lot of creepy weird offhand predictions about the future. He says he knows on some level he'll be there when Saul dies. That certainly pans out. He makes an offhand prediction that the Jedi have set the party up to take a fall. Right again. He tells a female PC that she'll have to make a choice soon, one she can't walk away from. And then we get the temple top. He even blurts out that "I sensed you would have to make a choice soon, and that was it*, I can feel it!"* If you specify a LS Female Revan, his recording for T3-M4 says he's had a hunch Revan would leave without warning. Again, spot on.

Specify a LS male Revan, and Carth will remark to Bastila that seeing the Exile reminds him "there are worse things to lose." The only other people who can see just how screwed up the Exile is are the Jedi Masters, Chodo Habat, and the Force Sensitive party members.

Specify a LS female Revan, and Carth will insist that he would know if Revan were dead (again, scary ass intuition) and that there's an "emptiness" where she used to be. Now, remember one of the things about a broken Force Bond? It would simply be "empty, a wound."

You know how your party members in KOTOR 2 feel upset or even horrified as they realize they feel compelled to protect Exile and can't being themselves to leave, even when said actions are kicking puppies? And how they swing wildly from being crazy, almost stalker level possessive of them to being scared out of their wits and clamming up when you try to pry anything out of them? And the more potent (and untapped) their Force Sensitivity, the more they get hammered with the effect? (Mira and Atton in particular) Yeah. Now, Carth's "I don't wanna talk" looks a bit different, doesn't it? It could also account for that romance arc, especially if you roll a DSF Revan and go for that "everyone dies" ending.

Again, Ajunta Pal. Seeing a Force Ghost? Yeah. Some degree of Sensitivity needed. Understanding what he's saying? Yeah. Takes a bit more than that. And Carth makes a weirdly insightful comment about the Dark Side on top of it.

Notice that this a wall o text argument already, and I'm now just getting to the "Yeah, his kid is able to throw around mid-level Dark Side powers and packing a red lightsaber." Given the jawline and the muleheaded attitude, no way Morgana was fooling around with the pizza delivery boy. That's definitely Carth's kid, and that's definitely Force Sensitivity. Now, while it can skip a generation (see Theron Shan), it tends to run pretty heavy in families.

Lastly? Gee. He comes from a planet settled by and heavily populated by descendants of Force Sensitives who failed their training. I'm also willing to bet some bastard children of Jedi get passed off as "foundlings" and "orphans" and dumped there, too. Jedi are forbidden attachments, but not sworn to celibacy, so...yeah, bastard kids are gonna happen. There's probably a Jedi or two in that family tree. It's circumstantial evidence at best, but it still supports the case.

Now, any arguments I missed? Counterarguments?

And the million credit question: If there's a character who gets to break this news to poor Flyboy, who do you think would actually take that on? How do you think Carth would take that kind of news? And what, if anything, would come of it?

I kinda figure Jolee might be the only one nuts enough to poke that with a stick...I also kinda figure "Sentinel" would fit best. Consular? Hell no. He hired Mical for that. Guardian works with the feats, but the whole "ferreting out deceit and injustice?" Yeah. That's Carth.

#KOTOR #Carth #fandom meta #Carth Onasi

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choco-glow · 3 years

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Just One Yesterday

“Commander…Master…um…” The scarred man in the dark, hooded robes, his mask laying in his lap, chin resting on his gauntlet, glanced up over his knuckles and quirked an eyebrow, dark eyes bloodshot and exhausted…And the young Jedi gulped. “I um…Master…Master Oteg wishes to speak to you?” He only nodded, waiting for the young man to scamper off, and lifted himself from the chair, stealing another glance back out at the stars. It had become a comfort to see the stars outside the clear bulwark; three long, horrific centuries he’d been held in that prison of body and mind, and yet, the stars had changed little in all that time.

He left his mask hanging on his belt (Mandalore’s mask, a dozen lifetimes ago, made his when he’d fought back the Clans, when he’d first fallen…) and made his silent way through the ship, footfalls as light as the wind on Manaan. The meditation chambers were…oddly comforting, and Revan breathed in the rich scent of the vilian flowers, their crawling vines hanging heavy all about the room. It smelled like Dantooine, like home; Tython had been the ancient home of the Order, long ago, and he’d been there once upon a time as a young Padawan himself in distant, blurred memories, but Dantooine was far stronger in his heart, far fresher in his memory…and stolen moments with his friends, his crew, had made the pastoral planet a home that before, he hadn’t had.

“You are so much stronger than me, and you returned from the dark side. I too can do the same, with your guidance, Master Revan…”

“Maybe you’re smarter than I thought, taking advice from an old man like me…been a long while since I came back home…Don’t make my mistakes, young’un.”

“Kinda nice place, reminds me of Telos, of home…Y’know, you’re the first real friend I’ve had that cared about what happened to Morgana and Dustil…”

“Check it out, Big Z! This place is pretty cool…Let’s go up there! C’mon, Zaalbar, let’s go explore! You can eat later!”

“Arrrghh, rrraagh rrrrrh!” *

“Heh, never thought I’d get a taste for the quiet life, and yet, here we are…aliit ori'shya tal'din, Jetii.” **

”I…know you can’t possibly forgive us for what we’ve done to you…and I won’t make excuses for it. But I’m glad you’re back. I really am…”

“Master Revan Shan.” He blinked, shaking his head free of the voices, long, long dead and gone, and found himself staring down at a very, very familiar face…and he swallowed. This Master Oteg…he could have been a dead ringer for Master Vandar, but Vandar Tokare was dead, betrayed on a far away planet long ago, and a sudden surge of homesickness and sorrow flooded Revan’s heart and mind…And the kindness he felt through the Force, through Oteg’s aura, undid him completely. It pushed away the darkness he felt in his very soul, and he reached for it, for the Master before him.

He collapsed though, tears streaming down his face, and for as small as the older Master was, now Revan was the pupil before him, prostrate with grief and longing. The elfin creature, his wrinkles marking his age, his green eyes soft, laid a gentle, clawed hand on his shoulder and drew him close, comforting the broken man as though he were his own Padawan. “Oh my boy…for all that you’ve a century on me, you’ve been so lost…” He wept, unashamed, three long centuries of death and despair and Vitiate’s claws in his mind, and Revan clung to Oteg through the storm of emotions, until the winds finally faded.

“How…how did you know my surname? No one knew I took Bastila’s name…she wanted it that way, and I didn’t dare risk our babe…All I had of her was the dreams and our dyad, our bond…and even then, I couldn’t look too hard, for fear of him…” He whispered when the sobs eased, when he managed to speak again, his voice hoarse and aching, and Oteg hummed, patting his hair with a gentleness that Revan didn’t feel he deserved…but he accepted it gladly, desperate for any sort of contact. It was a parent’s touch, and he closed his eyes, leaning into it.

“Bastila told me. Well…not in person. Not the way she wanted to. But she did tell me about you…and her love for you.” Revan’s heart ached at that, but he eased back, rubbing the tears off his face and taking a long, deep breath, letting it out with a sigh. “As for the rest…I know what was done to you. What you lost in memory, and in your life. Very many do know the basic facts…and the rest, much like many other legends deep in the galaxy, have myths to lean heavily on. But we in the Jedi, and even a bare handful of Sith, know the truth of who and what you were after the Masters erased your memory…but we don’t know who you were before that. Much…was lost, both accidentally and otherwise.” Revan nodded, lips twisting a little with anger.

“…I have a few memories. Vitiate…well, I won’t say he kept me sane, because he…nothing that was done in that hellish fortress was sane. But there was one Sith, a pureblood, who had no name as we know it, but he knew me. He knew me very well, and he knew how to retrieve memories, even those thought to be erased…and in return for my aid in influencing Vitiate’s mind, he helped me retain my sanity…and regain some of my loss. Not all of it…I don’t know my old name, nor my birthplace, or even my true age. I don’t have a birthday…but I have the memories of the Star Forge, how I got it rebuilt, how I used it…and how I fell.”

“And you have Bastila.” Revan closed his eyes at that, tears burning under his eyelids, and oh, he had Bastila…those memories, the dreams he’d watched over her in, with Scourge’s help, he’d kept from Vitiate, kept everything from the monster in regards to his son, to his heart, to his friends…Carth had lived on, Mission and Zaalbar had survived. Juhani, Canderous, Jolee…Even HK had survived. Teethree…He ached at the loss of the little droid, that night he lost Meetra too, and a touch of the Force soothed his grief, Meetra’s ghost giving him that one last lingering gift yet still.

“…My friends and my love. But…They are gone now, long gone. What can the Council ask of me now? I’m a broken husk of what I once was…” He murmured, meeting Oteg’s eyes once more, though tears still burned down his cheeks, his scars aching as much as his heart. Oteg only smiled, and with a gesture of the Force, brought over a set of tea cups, and a kettle, still steaming from the range nearby.

“For now, they ask me to heal you, as much as you can bear; of heart-wounds as much as the Force-depletion and literal physical wounds you’ve endured too. And they ask you to rest; even with hyperdrives, it’s a long, long way back to Tython.”

“…Not Coruscant?”

“No. For one, the Jedi Temple is still in ruin there, from the war, and for another, I will not allow the Senate to inflict itself on you. Tython is not Dantooine, and sadly we’ve not rebuilt the enclave on Dantooine for many reasons…but it is largely safe, and the Order is many, many more Jedi strong now. There is darkness there…but I trust you. As does the Grandmaster and the rest of the Council.” He blinked at that, and when Oteg offered him the fragrant tea, thankfully not from Dantooine, Revan managed to even sip it a little, rolling the strange, interesting spices on his tongue. It wasn’t the same…but different wasn’t bad, either.

“…I appreciate that. I truly do. For now…the rest…it is very deeply needed. I hope…perhaps I may be allowed to lay out a bedroll here? The vines…remind me of home.” He swallowed the rest of his statement, and Oteg smiled, broadly now.

“I don’t mind in the slightest, but I have a spare bedroom too, with the vines inside as well. You’re welcome to rest there as long as you need to. Dantooine was under my watch for many years, and I grew these vines for much the same reason Bastila did; for the comfort they brought me. The tea is a healing herb from Tython, with a bit of root from my favorite spot on Alderaan to gather flowers and other plants, and will help settle your stomach to handle food that’s more solid than an intravenous line.”

“…Thank you. I suspected I’d be on mush for a while.” Oteg chuckled at Revan’s wryness, and Revan’s lips quirked up, just a little, before he sipped his tea again. The Master shifted away and began puttering about the place, and Revan settled back against the cushions of a rounded lounge seat, tilting his head back and just…breathing. Closing his eyes, with the breeze off the vents, he could just about pretend he was back on the Khoonda Plain, out under the biryan trees, his crew dozing all around him. Canderous snoring, Carth humming softly, Bastila’s soft breathing, her hand just touching his…Jolee’s quiet reading, turning page after page of a well-worn book.

Zaalbar grooming his fur, making the soft little Wookiee noises that one might chitter at a cub, while Mission dozed against Carth’s side with Zaalbar at her back, curled up and breathing so lightly that you couldn’t hear her hardly at all. Juhani practicing her Force manipulation by healing the very earth around her, in apology to her last master and the darkness she’d sought there, and of course, the distant sounds of blaster fire as HK and Teethree hunted for dinner. And Revan, in the center of it all, soaking up the sunshine like a flower that had been buried for far too long, his heart full of light and love, the darkness banished…Another tear slipped over his cheek, and he let it fall, let them all fall, as he gave into the slumber carrying him off into his memories once more.

I love you all so much…I miss you…

A week solid of rest, good food, and healing had brought Revan back to the living nearly completely, and he ignored the hollow ache in his very soul as he stepped off the shuttle onto the first planet he’d seen in three centuries. The Force healing had done wonders for his connection to the ancient power, and already, he could feel the shades of light and dark in the Force on Tython, just as Master Oteg had said. The Rakatans weren’t wrong…I wonder how much of the past the Jedi really know? Because the Rakata Elders had known so, so much…even with as much as was lost, they told me everything…

“Master Revan.” He paused, his mask now hidden behind his breastplate, his hood drawn back despite how it made him feel too visible…and looked up at the man standing before him, a human male with a simple cut to his brown hair and deep lines from what looked to be a near constant frown. He sensed annoyance, no little anger, and a certain amount of frustration at having to greet this particular guest, and Revan smiled, just a little, though there was no humor in it. Let him be angry; he’s not half the fighter I am, for all that I’ve been in stasis for so long, and he damn well knows it.

His lightsabers, saved by Scourge long ago, had been battered and broken, but Oteg had been kind enough to provide him with the tools and crystals to restore them…and Revan had them now on each hip, a purple one…and a red one. He’d hesitated over that crystal for a moment, feeling the weakness in the green, blue, and yellow ones…and finally, he closed his hand around the gem…and felt the Force hurtle through him, tasting the power on his tongue. Perhaps it is too much of a temptation… He hadn’t gotten this far by taking the easy path, though, and he was more than strong enough to handle that power.

Oteg…hadn’t commented on that. Revan found that he was grateful for it. This man, though…Revan bowed, slightly, keeping his attitude to himself for the time being, and opting for aloof and mysterious. There was a darkness here that seeped into the very heart of the Temple; he could sense it, though it was far older than Vitiate, far baser and weaker…but it had survived much in the many, many millennia since the Jedi had left. The ruins at Kaleth are what Oteg warned me about; someone’s been poking where they shouldn’t.

“I am. And you are, Master…?” His tone was perfectly polite, crisp and just a touch of that ‘Alderaanian noble’ air, which had the exact effect Revan intended. He’d had it for years before his fall, and rebuilt it with Carth’s help during their fight against Malek, and after; it served him in good stead now. The man straightened, anger flashing in his blue eyes, and his lips twisted before he spoke again, his voice acidic enough that Revan smiled even more. Bingo. Little prick makes me miss HK all the more. What I wouldn't give for a classic "Meatbags." comment right now.

“Master Jaric Kaedan. This way, if you so please.” He whirled and stomped off, and Revan followed along behind him, his ancient styled robes billowing in a way that seemed to startle the Jedi they passed. Master Kaedan kept a brisk pace, but looked unnerved when he glanced back to find Revan keeping pace with him, hands tucked in a hidden set of pockets, his footfalls just as silent as before on the ship, and Revan’s smirk only grew. Brat. If only he knew the truth…but then, I’ve fallen, and I’m wearing the shadows of what I once was. I suppose I can forgive his anger.

The Padawans and trainees they passed didn’t know what to think of the scarred man in long, tattered black robes; he’d been given the option of clean, more neutral ones from Oteg, but he’d only cleaned his old ones, and pulled them back on, taking comfort in the Star Forge’s armor. Pity my white robes are long gone, because they would have been far better for this, but I don’t want to lose myself yet again, this time in the Jedi once more.

The great room with the enormous Force-driven rotating holocron in the middle was oddly calming, and had Revan a minute to spare, he would have lost himself in watching it, drinking in the healing calmness of the Force that radiated from the enormous dodecahedron. But Kaedan was too fast, and Revan bit back his annoyance, following the impatient man to the Council doors. There, he opened the smaller entrance door, ushering Revan inside…and for the first time in a long time, Revan stopped dead, his mind reeling at the sheer power contained in the room. Oteg really meant it…Atris had betrayed the Jedi, evil bitch that she was, she decimated us…but this…

Hope swelled in his heart, for the first time in…well, centuries, and Revan eagerly stepped forward, feeling his fear and anger melt away, joy making a smile touch his lips as he made his way to the Masters lined up before him…

SLAP.

The blow struck him perfectly from the handsome woman who stepped up to him, her long braids still swinging from the gesture, blue-gray eyes furious, and Revan brought a gloved hand up to his jaw, moving the joint to make sure it wasn’t broken. He studied her, eyes wide, shock freezing him in place, and he swallowed, a sinking feeling in his gut now.

“…You…look awfully familia-”

SLAP. The second slap had a stinging burst of power behind it, and it knocked Revan off his feet, tossing him back with an ease that made his heart absolutely drop into his boots…and he gazed up at his descendant with a gulp, shrinking a little under the gaze all Shan women perfected long before they reached adulthood. He could see where time and DNA had changed the look of her, but those eyes, those eyes were all Bastila’s legacy, and Revan felt another pang for the woman he’d loved so much, and the son he’d never known.

“…Shit.”

“You selfish son of a bitch, you’re damn right I look familiar. I am Grandmaster Satele Shan, of the Jedi Order. And on behalf of my great-grandmother, I deliver this message.” She snarled out, eyes flashing, all sense of calm lost in a sea of anger…and she held up a holocron…no, a Noetikon. A Noetikon that Revan hadn't ever seen before...but he could feel the power stored within it deep in his very soul. Revan’s eyes widened as a figure appeared, all in the soft blue of the hologram…but he knew that face, that body, those eyes anywhere.

“…Bastila?” He whispered, and she gazed down at him, her expression a mixture of sorrow and anger…and reached out a hand to him. He couldn’t take it, knew he couldn’t feel anything…but he reached for her too, his whole being yearning for her.

“Revan…” She murmured, and he choked on a sob, fingers closing on air and light, fighting to keep his composure before all these strangers. Oteg had been safe, had known many of the surviving masters, had even been mentored by Jolee…and he’d known Revan’s true self. These people didn’t. “…you know, I had a whole rant saved up, after all this time, how you abandoned us, how you left me without an explaination, how you were so damned selfish…”

“I’m sorry…I’m so sorry…I was selfish, I was a selfish bastard, and I deserve everything that I’ve been punished with…but I didn’t want to see you suffer more, and I couldn’t trust the Council…I couldn’t trust anyone but Carth, Jolee, and Juhani to keep you and Vaner safe…and I needed the others to keep each other safe, as best they could, and live the lives they deserved. Atris…I saw what she was becoming…”

“I know.” It was so simple, so poignant a sentence, and he froze, heart in his throat, eyes wide. “In uploading my consciousness to this Noetikon, enough to reason and think, I was also able to listen, to learn…and to understand. I’m still angry with you…but I love you enough to forgive you. You knew just how powerful Vitiate was…even if you didn’t remember entirely, you knew he was coming back. You knew…and you fought back the best way you knew how, but you had us to protect…and you were right. I was in no shape to fight alongside you, and neither was Jolee in his old age. Juhani and Carth gladly would have, and could, but…you were right again there.

“Had they left us, Jolee and I would have been found. Vaner…our little boy, he would have died…But he built a family of his own, and they continued that proud tradition, defying the Order in the one way that mattered to all of us…we chose love. I never regretted that…I never regretted you. I still don’t.” He drank in that forgiveness, those words, and laughed, aching, but real, blessedly real, when she chuckled a little. “I’m still mad, but I got over it pretty well, I think. Our children’s children, however, you’ll have to earn their forgiveness.”

“I…suspected as much. Bastila…I know this isn’t the same as a Force Ghost, nor are you entirely you, as you were…but I love you. I love you, and I am sorry…and I hope, I hope that matters at least a little.” The hologram smiled, soft and sweet…and winked out, leaving Revan to blink up at his descendant, confused and heartbroken…when a soft, ethereal voice filled the room, and it was Satele’s turn, along with the other Council members, to go wide-eyed in shock as they started at something behind him. Revan breathed in the scent of vilian flowers and a touch of leather, his heart leaping now as he slowly stood, turned…and there she was, not the older woman in the hologram, mature and long into her life…

“It always mattered.”

But his Bastila. His beautiful wife, her ponytails a little messy, her old robes shabby from sparring and exploring, her smile blinding in its joy. She was a ghost, that much was certain; the glow made it obvious, and though she had color in her skin and hair now, her clothes were a pale gray…he knew from experience that a ghost could only project so much. But when he wrapped his arms around her, she was firm to the touch, her curves fitting perfectly against his angles, and he buried his face in her shoulder, breathing in the scent of her with a shaky breath.

“Revan…”

“Bastila…”

“I can’t hold this for long…but the power here is enough to give us this.” She whispered, and he brought his head back up, pressing his forehead to hers, hugging her tight.

“It’s enough. It’s enough for me, to see you, hold you…” He murmured back, and they clung to one another. He augmented his power into hers, willing her to stay, just a little longer, and she relaxed in his arms…And it was Master Oteg, wise, good Master Oteg, who ushered the rest out of the Council chambers, letting Revan guide his beloved back to a small loveseat at the rear of the chamber, the two of them curling up together. They spoke of their son, a lifetime of memories that Revan had seen only in her dreams, of their grandchildren, and great-grandchildren, of Tasiele and Satele, and Theron, Satele’s SIS agent son.

Time became meaningless once more for Revan, for Bastila, for both of them, and when words began to fail them…they simply let their hearts say the rest, slow kisses and touches bleeding into one another. But their time was growing short…Revan could feel her slipping back into the Force, feel her strength waning…and when she gazed up at him, the color draining away, her eyes growing sad and weary…Revan kissed her, soft and sweet and lingering.

“It’s alright, love…”

“I have missed you so much…it’s too cruel that we only get this…” She murmured, and he tucked her under his chin, wrapping around her the way she wrapped around his waist and chest, hugging her tightly as he could.

“It is too cruel…but we were never graced with much luck, were we, my heart…” He whispered back, his voice hoarse from the long hours of talking, and the tears.

“…No, we never were. But we had one another…” He smiled at that, and she glanced up, smiling back. Revan touched his forehead to hers again, and Bastila sighed a little, fingers tightening in his robes, his chestplate and back armor long banished to the floor. “I love you, Revan…”

“I love you too, Bastila. It’s alright…you can let go…I’ll follow you soon. I promise. I…there isn’t much of me left, despite what they’ve done to heal me…” He whispered, and she opened her eyes, those gray irises just as captivating as the day they’d met on his flagship, all those long years ago…and when they met again, him fresh off the swoopbike and her fresh out of a fight, the two of them angry and a little in love already.

“…I’ll be here for you. Always.” She murmured, resting one hand on his heart…and with a sigh, she became nothing once again, the warmth of her hand lingering still over his heart, the touch of her lips still on his…and the scent of vilian flowers filling the air. He stared into space for a long, long time…and when he rose again, he buckled on his armor in silence, and with a gesture, opened the doors to allow the other Jedi to come back in. But before he turned…he took out his mask, and stared down at it.

The long lines of red and black, the smoky visor; he’d worn it when he went after the Emperor, after augmenting it with as much tech as he could to keep the monster from infiltrating his mind. But that hadn’t helped him when Meetra was murdered, when Teethree was cut down…and though he hated Scourge for what he’d done, he knew it was on Vitiate’s orders. And he knew too, could sense it, that the Emperor still held power, even now. …I cannot be a Jedi again. Be it my own darkness, or the taint of the Emperor’s mind, there is little of the light left inside me now…and he still lives outside the Force. His power is too much for these young Jedi to handle…But I know it well.

He knew it better than any other, Jedi or Sith, even the Emperor’s Wrath, and he knew too how he could destroy Vitiate. Forever. I suspect I know what they will ask of me…and yet, I have so much more to do. I cannot leave him to continue destroying the galaxy…But I will hear them out. I owe my Bastila, and my descendant, that much.

Revan donned the mask once more, fitting it with ease, and turned, crossing his arms as he planted his feet, his voice deepening as he spoke.

“Grandmaster Shan, I believe you had a task for me…”

#revan/bastila #revan #bastila shan #force ghosts #found family #memories #satele shan #master oteg #wrote this at the start of quarantine #and somehow it started a series

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ipreferfiction · 3 years

Note

5 and 20 for kotor

5: has fandom ever ruined a pairing for you?

Oh boy. I honestly can't really say so; I disliked Carth/Revan before I even got into fandom, and most of my pairings are decently popular.

20: what is the purest ship in the fandom?

Lee they're war criminals

(In all seriousness though, there aren't really any pure ships; everything is super unhealthy lol)

#answered asks #revanchxst #kotor

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spectraspecs-writes · 4 years

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Korriban - Chapter 89

Link to the masterpost. Chapter 88. Chapter 90.

@averruncusho @ceruleanrainblues @chubbsmomma @strangepostmiracle thank you for reading, you get a tag. @skelelexiunderlord thank you for support, you get a tag.

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“What do you mean? We have to go see him right now!” Carth objects.

“I get where you’re coming from, Carth, but if he recognizes me and thinks I followed him, we’ll immediately get off on the wrong foot, and he won’t listen to a single thing we have to say.” He scoffs angrily and wipes his face. “You’re a soldier, you’re not used to thinking this way. But I am, I know how to get people to listen to me. You have to trust me on this, Carth.”

He looks at me for a bit, and then he sighs. “I trust you,” he says, “I just don’t like it.”

I pull out my datapad and look at the Academy map. Master Uthar’s room is at the end of the hall. That’s where I’m going. “I’m going to set up the device from Yuthura. Then we can go talk to him. You want to be my lookout?”

“Yeah,” he says with a sigh, “Gives me something to do.”

“You watch the room,” Jolee says, “I’ll watch the hall.”

Got all our bases covered, then. We head out. Jolee posts himself in the hall, watching people go from the rooms to the main chamber where Master Uthar still is. Carth and I head the other way. We pass the hallway where Dustil’s room is, and I gently pull Carth away. At the end of the main hall is Uthar’s room, the only door down this far. It opens with the passcard Yuthura gave me. Carth posts himself outside the door while I go inside. I carefully lift up the mattress on Uthar’s bed and place the device on the frame, where it secures itself. Hard to believe it’s that easy.

There’s a datapad sitting next to Uthar’s bed. I’m willing to bet there’s a lot of information about how to gain prestige on there. I pull out my datapad and set it to interface with any within range. Damn - Uthar has most entries locked. I can only get the last week’s worth of data. Even so, there’s quite a lot of information here for a week’s worth. Some of it is absolutely worthless. Some of it, not so much, even just from a quick perusal. No time to sit here and read the whole thing. I’ve done what I came here to do, I should leave. I lock the door behind me, still reading the contents of the scan. There’s an entry on -

“Dustil.” Carth leans over my shoulder. “His name’s on there, what are you looking at?”

“I skimmed Uthar’s personal datapad, only got a week’s worth of data. Would you quit reading over my shoulder?” I send to Jolee that we’re finished and he joins us. I tap into the entry, out of my own curiosity, not Carth’s.

“The pupil known as Dustil,” Uthar wrote, “has shown remarkable progress. His talent with the Force is great.” Is that so? Neat. “The same, however, cannot be said for the human female that he arrived with, Selene.” I heard that name in the library, she died recently, in the Valley, Dustil said. “She has little talent. Moreover, Dustil holds a great degree of affection for her.” I thought so. “This is a weakness in the boy and has been slowing down his training. Orders were sent this morning to have the girl removed from the academy and terminated.” A far cry from “killed in the Valley.” “I will tell Dustil that she was killed in the valley. He will forget her soon enough, I think… he is too promising to lose at this juncture."

“Oh, wow,” I say softly. Carth is too focused to hear me.

The door to Dustil’s room is open as he uses his computer terminal. His eyes drift up to me in the doorway and he does a bit of a double take. “You take a wrong turn somewhere?” he asks. His voice even has the same inflections as Carth.

Carth gets a look at him, gaping in shock. “Dustil?”

Dustil is… not pleased, to put it mildly. “Oh, lovely,” he says sarcastically, “It's Father. Figures that you'd show up after all this time.” He looks at me as Carth and I come into the room. Jolee stands outside still. “How did you manage to get inside the academy?”

“Through the front door,” I say reflexively.

“Cute.” Yep, that’s Carth’s son. “I wonder how interested Master Uthar would be to know just who he has in his web. Unless you've switched sides, Father?” Dustil scoffs. “But I doubt that. Just why are you here, Father?” he asks skeptically, “Not for me, I hope. Couldn't you have gotten yourself blown up on some ship and spared us this reunion?” Ouch.

“Dustil, what…?” Carth stammers, “What are you talking about? I… I thought you were dead!”

“Too bad you didn't still think that,” he scoffs, “Or did you really think I would be happy to see you? Look, everyone!” he says sarcastically, “It's Father, come to rescue me at long last! Sure, he may have left Mother and I to die on Telos, but that doesn't matter!”

“No, I didn't abandon you!” Carth protests painfully, “The task force just arrived too late. Telos was in ruins, and your mother… I held her while…” I place my hand on his shoulder to comfort him, but he shrugs it off. He doesn’t want to be comforted. “But I looked for you. I swear I looked everywhere --”

“Ah, save it,” Dustil stops him, “You abandoned us long before. We were alone all during the wars, and even once you came back, you still didn't stay.”

“I didn't have a choice! I was needed --”

“Yeah? Well you were needed at home, too!” Dustil interrupts, “You were needed when the bombing started and I got captured!” I can feel his anger rising and when you’re in the room with a Sith, that’s a big problem. They’re known to take their lightsabers out when that happens. I rest my own hand on my lightsaber. I won’t kill Dustil if I don’t have to but I’ll be damned if if he’s going to kill my Bunny Man. But then his anger fades a little, which is weird for a Sith. “You know what? It doesn't matter,” he says, “Not anymore. I have a new family now, a family that cares about me. I don't need you.”

Carth’s heart drops. “The Sith? You can't mean that! No, the Sith killed your mother! The Sith destroyed Telos!”

“So? You're the soldier, father. How many mothers have you killed?” Ouch! Sounds like the Sith added a course in verbal bashing.

Carth doesn’t want to believe a single word of this - I’ve only ever seen him like this when he was yelling at me. “No,” he says, “You've been brainwashed. The son I knew would never --”

“You never knew me!” I draw my lightsaber off my belt but I don’t activate it. His anger is rising again. I don’t like that. “You weren't even there to know me, so don't presume to tell me what I would or wouldn't do!”

“I don’t know what’s been done to you, but you're coming with me out of here. Now.”

Carth reaches out to Dustil, but Dustil backs away and puts his hand on his lightsaber. “Touch me, old man, and I'll kill you!” Carth withdraws. God, I can feel his pain. He feels like hell. “Get out! Get out of here before I tell the Sith that you're here!”

“Calm down, Dustil.” I stay between the two of them. “Carth is only trying to protect you.”

“I don't need his protection!” he exclaims, “Not anymore! The Sith give me everything I need.”

Carth gently shoves me out of the way - gently for an angry Carth, anyway - and I let him. “You can't mean that!” he says, “The Sith are… they're evil! They're the Dark Side. They… they took me away from you and your mother. They're… they're what took you from me!”

“No, they're not evil! They're not! The Dark Side is superior, and you… you were at war long before they came along!”

“The Sith war to conquer, to rule the helpless,” Carth counters, “I went to war for you, Dustil. For your freedom, your future!”

Dustil shakes his head. “I don’t believe you.”

“If I failed you, son, then it's… it's my failure,” Carth says, “Please don't add to it by becoming part of something evil.”

I know how stubborn Carth can be when it comes down to it, so it only makes sense that Dustil would be the same. I can’t imagine who would give in first. “Prove it,” Dustil says, “Prove that the Sith are so evil and I'll… I'll think about it.”

The datapad. I pull it back out. “How about this - you know someone named Selene?”

He stops completely. He didn’t expect me to talk, expected even less for me to mention her name. “Selene?” he repeats softly, “She's the one who convinced me to come to the academy with her. Why?” I pull up the entry and hand my datapad to him. “Where did you get this?” he asks as he reads it.

“I skimmed Master Uthar’s datapad - you can see his data in the file tags,” I say, “You can’t fake that.”

He checks the tags, sees the data. “But…” he says slowly, unable to take his eyes off the datapad, “he told me… he- he said that she'd been lost on a mission in the Valley. This… this says that they… they killed her…”

“Because she was hindering your progress,” I finish.

“Superiority at any cost, Dustil,” Carth says, “There's your evil. Or can you live with that?”

“No,” Dustil says, without a moment of hesitation, “No, I can't. I… I had no idea… they lied to me.”

Carth smiles softly. “Well, there's the son I remember,” he says, “Now will you leave here?”

“I… no,” Dustil says, “You go do whatever you have to, father. I… I have some other friends here. I have to warn them what's going on.” He smiles softly at Carth. “And maybe I can, you know, look around here and find out some more information. From the inside. Something that might help you.”

Carth sighs shortly. “I… don't suppose there's any way I could talk you out of that, is there? I mean, you're not going to do anything halfway.” He chuckles. “Sounds familiar.”

“I… guess it does.”

“I'm proud of you, Dustil,” Carth says, “You aren't hanging onto a lie after you see it for what it is. Not everyone could do that.”

Dustil smiles again. “Maybe…” he starts to say, “… after this is over, we can… talk. I'm still not sure about… us, but I'll listen. Maybe we can get back to where we should have been.”

“I’d like that.” Carth eyes are glistening.

Dustil transfers the entry from my datapad to his and hands mine back to me. “I'll go back to Telos when this is over,” he says, “You can find me there. Goodbye… father.” He moves past us out the door and down the hall, moving quickly.

Carth wipes his eyes. “I’m really glad that worked out,” I say.

Carth doesn’t say anything. He looks at me, and he can’t stop smiling. “What?” I ask.

And suddenly he kisses me. Knocks the wind right out of me! Oh, wow! When he breaks he says softly, “Thank you.”

Holy fuck!

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its-sixxers · 4 years

Text

Video Game Questionnaire

Tagged by @slothssassin!

Tagging any of y’all hoes (or non hoes) who wanna talk about some got dang VIDYA GAEMS

Rules: Fill in your answers below and tag some buddies!

-Games-

First game you ever played: Pokemon Red on the OG game boy. Hell yeah.

Favorite game: Don’t make me do this. D: Probably a toss up between: Heroes of Might and Magic III, Knights of the Old Republic (1 and 2), Vampire the Masquerade Bloodlines aaaand Fallout New Vegas.

Game you hated at first but now love: Darkest Dungeon! I found out my gameplay groove and now really really like it. I didn’t hate it before, just found it frustrating.

Game you used to love but now hate: I don’t really hate any game that I used to love (even World of Warcraft), but I can’t ever go back to the Mass Effect Trilogy for reasons that are probably obvious to anyone who’s played it. I got hurt too bad man. :(

actually just recalled and this is gonna be a SPICY opinion: FFXIV. I had a lot of fun with it but the RP scene drove me off really fast. WoW’s Moon Guard gets a lot of shit, but FFXIV was miles worse for general grossness. I don’t begrudge anyone who has fun with the game or RPs in it (there’s a lot of fun lore!) but I don’t have the energy for trying to sift through that amount of nightmare to find like the dozen cool people lol.

Game with the best group/companion(s): This was a hard one. There’s games that have my favorite characters ever but also have some really annoying companions, there’s games with characters I like across the board but the execution is weak. I’m just going to say VTM Bloodlines for easiness’ sake. A great cast and I actually think I like them all for specific reasons. Yes, even Ming Xiao. Maybe especially Ming Xiao, actually.

A game with your favorite ending: Bloodlines even though I had to turn godmode on for the last combat portions teehee. I just love the twist. :D

A game with the WORST ending: See Mass Effect above. Yes it’s been like a decade, no I’m still not over it.

Best character customization?: HRMST. With mods, Fallout 4. Without - I played Black Desert Online for a whole 3 seconds and it had an insane amount of options but I found it overwhelming lol.

Also putting a cut here cuz long post.

-Hero and Companions-

Your favorite playable character: Jedi Exile or the Courier.

The funniest playable character: Garrett from the Thief series is a smartass and I love him for it. The Courier also gets some great options, naturally.

Your favorite companion(s): Oh christ here we go. Carth Onasi, Jolee Bindo, HK-47, Atton Rand, Kreia, Bao-Dur, Kaidan Alenko, Garrus, Tali, Wrex, Legion, The Entire New Vegas Gang, Butch DeLoria, Charon, Deacon, Preston.

Companions you could live without: This is a difficult one since even companions I’m not super fond of have their place and purpose in the narrative, usually. I’m going to say G0-T0 and Hanharr from KOTOR 2 as they kept that game from the Best Companions title lol. I don’t play dark side and both of them just felt a little underdeveloped for me.

oh and skadge from SWTOR, fuck skadge

-Relationships-

Favorite game friendship(s): Shepard + everyone, Morrigan and the Female Warden, Josie + Inquisitor, The Courier + everyone, Sole Survivor + everyone, Female Revan + Bastila, Exile + the new Jedi gang.

Favorite companion banter: This might make me a basic bitch but Deacon. The interplay between goofiness and sadness is just perfect.

A relationship you loved but went bad: Revan and Carth. It went bad because Revan fucked off to the Unknown Regions and left him behind, then we find out why in SWTOR (and they canonize Revan as a dude BOOOO) and it’s dumb lol.

A relationship you weren’t sure of but loved: Kaidan and Shepard when Mass Effect 2 rolled along. Being railroaded into working with Cerberus had me VERY annoyed at the time and Kaidan’s 100% right to also be mad about it so I was like oh god yeah I’d break up too. Mass Effect 2 has the best companions + side story but the worst main quest fight me. (Actually don’t pls)

A character you wish you COULD romance: Let’s list em off, shall we: D E A C O N, Nick Valentine, Glory, Nathaniel Howe, Bao-Dur, Nines Rodriguez, LaCroix, Beckett. Let me do it you cowards.

A minor character you wish could be a companion: Harding in Inquisition, Glory (actually most of the Railroad would be nice), Scout Haylen, Fahrenheit.

-Fun-

Shoutout to a random NPC: All the Jawas in KOTOR I love them. Oh and Officer Chunk in Bloodlines, that stupid, stupid man.

A game you love watching playthroughs for and want to play: I don’t actually seek out more than one let’s play of a game. :V I’d say the old Call of Cthulhu game though - it’s really neat but buggy as all hell and the one time I tried starting it up it ended up breaking real big time. It’s fun to watch people luckier (or more tech competent) than I am play it and I wish I could do the same.

Love watching playthroughs but won’t ever play: My boyfriend and I sometimes do this thing where he’ll stream a game he’s playing and I’ll sit in voice chat with him while I work with the stream in the other screen, so probably the games he’s done there. Most recent ones have been: Metal Gear Solid, FF7 and FF9.

Online gaming or solo?: I looove solo games but I love online more. Being in an LDR, playing games together online is really good. I enjoy having fun with friends, and I also enjoy the competitive aspect that comes along with online games. It really pushes me to be better at things and improve. Usually I’m in some kind of MMO - it’s looking to be WoW for the forseeable future right now. Sometimes I’ll get dragged into games like Planetside or Destiny and have a fun time for a month or two as well. :) I had a ton of fun with Sea of Thieves a few months ago too! Living our Captain Jack fantasy.

Why do you play video games?: More than ever recently - creative inspiration. I like poking into weird games or games with a really strong art direction or good writing. (EYE Divine Cybermancy, Pathologic, Sunless Seas/Skies, Cultist Simulator, Dishonored, Darkwood, and Darkest Dungeon being a few of them). I also just really like a good story and good characters. Being able to immerse myself in another world is great. I also play them for that little cookie of accomplishment - beating a hard boss (LOOKING AT YOU NAMELESS KING) or figuring out a puzzle (Cultist Simulator is chock full of those) or surviving spookies (Darkwood big time). Video games are great and they hold my attention better than TV or movies as I actually have to engage with them lol.

#tagged stuff #i have a somewhat eclectic collection of vidya i like aside from the mainstay RPGs #i wish there were more indie weird rpgs like there are indie weird horror games or shooters

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uhhhdeej · 4 years

Text

THINGS ARE HEATING UP!

So I helped Zaalbar and his father overthrow his bro/son as leader of the tribe and it sparked a rebellion on Kashyyyk, just tying up lose ends ya know. I grabbed the Star Map cause apparently the machine was ready to just give it to me after fighting off the droids and I didn’t realize. I had just woken up and I thought “I’ll finish this and then fly over to Manaan real quick and then go on about my normal routine waking up, like eat, shower etc.” boy was I WRONG

So as lil ol me is flying through space I thought “I really hope I don’t get attacked by pirates or whatever” cause I’ve had that happen a few times and I hate it so when a cut scene played I was like “fuckkk” but it wasn’t pirates, it was a big Sith ship! The leviathan! SAULS SHIP! THE SAUL THAT WAS A COMMANDER IN THE REPUBLIC ARMY, SWITCHED SIDES AND KILLED CARTHS WIFE!

So as we’re going along in the tracterbeam, Bastila was like “ok we need a plan, someone has to hide and not get captured so they can save the rest of us maybe” and I of course said I would do it because I have the +8 stealth device I got from my boy Hulus of the assassin league but she said I couldn’t be me, her or Carth cause we’re like the main people the Sith want and that’s understandable actually!

I could pick anyone from the party, which was hella fucking cool and my first instinct was Mission, she’s stealthy and quiet but also a kid...I debated maybe HK-47 cause he’s a maniac but I found myself wanting to go with Juhani cause she’s pretty stealthy and also a Jedi so I went with her and then I realized now I’ve developed the same mindset I hated at the start of the game, that Jedi are better and stronger and more reliable 😭 that force heal is just too good and lightsabers and ughhh

BUT, we all get captured and Saul starts interrogating us, mostly me though and when I wouldn’t answer he would shock us! But then he started to do this slimy tactic of “well maybe you’ll answer if instead of shocking you, I’ll just torture Bastile!” And at first I’m thinking “lol nice try but I don’t even like her”

The game even knew I’d think that lol but honestly, after the first shock I got to feeling bad for her 😢 but I stayed strong and didn’t say anything! But Saul said something that’s been stuck in my head, he said something like my loyalty was questionable and implied I had done something against the republic and my party and at first I thought “oh it’s probably because my dark side points are kinda high since I’ve been assassinating people” but when I pushed him on it he said “oh wow you don’t remember? I’m not going to take away the pleasure for Malek by telling you, he’ll want to tell you in person” 😱😱😱😱😱😱😱 my mind is racing with possibilities

#knights of the old republic #kotor #star wars

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annakie · 5 years

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An Annotated Mass Effect Playthrough, Part Seven

List of Posts: 0 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9

Wherein we... talk to the crew. I didn’t quite make it off the ship.

Still, a lot of words.

Aka the nearly All-Gif update.

Didn’t get a chance to play ME at all this week, so I’m going to spend a few hours this weekend (double-checking to make sure screenshotting works :p) and have some real updates later.

So making it back to the ship from Therum, it’s time to talk to the crew. I maybe could have gone and talked to them after getting on the ship after the Citadel, but they don’t really have any unique lines then so, I usually wait til now to go chat.

First, let’s talk to Liara.

The thing that sucks about talking to Liara (or Kaidan, or Ashley, if you don’t want to romance them) is, you know, the accidental romance. Making “picking the Paragon-place choices = romance by default with NO WARNING” design was very Not Good. They fixed this in later games, well moreso in Dragon Age games than ME, (and Andromeda is done very well for this) but still. In ME3, the BackOff mod does a great job of making romance dialog more obvious and intentional.

Liara’s dialog choices I feel like are even LESS obviously flirting I feel like than Ash and Kaidan’s. Honestly with Liara’s most of the lines can be read and even said aloud as friendship then BOOM, all of a sudden she wants a threesome. I choose middle dialog options whenever possible with Liara just to avoid this. I’m not interested, never have been, don’t want Kaidan to think he has any competition. But seriously, it’s poor game design here that you literally have to be a jerk to a companion at some points to avoid having them think you want to bang. God, half of the reason I’d love a remaster would be to hopefully fix shit like this to avoid some of the pitfalls.

I hate that some people use this as a reason to dislike these characters more. And I’ll admit, in my early days as a ME fan, I held it against Liara, too, until I realized how dumb that is. I especially hate it when you get to the “confrontation scene” and people use Kaidan not wanting to be in a threesome as a reason to dislike him more? It’s not a bad thing to want to be monogamous? (And of course, it’s not a bad thing to NOT want to be, assuming everyone is open and OK about it.)

I just prefer to not get that scene at all now, and to avoid “leading anyone on” accidentally etc. My Shepard knows early on what she wants, and sticks with him all the way through.

I was going to talk more here about my feelings about Liara in general but uh, I guess I’ll do that later. This is already really long.

Here’s a great post about how to avoid romancing Kaidan while being rude as little as possible to him.

Well since he’s right outside the medbay anyway, let’s go talk to the LT.

Have I mentioned how much I hate the orange glow?

So anyway, I thought maybe I’d talk here a little bit about Why Kaidan?

I will point out here that I am mostly a hetero woman, so my choices in video game romances lean towards men first, though I’m also very cool with doing non-m/f romances in games, and often do on subsequent playthroughs of games I love, but that’s almost never gonna be my primary romance.

I’d already mentioned my love for Carth Onasi, one of the most hated companions in video games, If You’re A Guy.

By today’s standards, even the Carth romance isn’t that great. But at the time, it was the greatest romance I’d experienced in video games. There were a few others that were really good -- Valen Shadowbreath in Neverwinter Nights: Horde of the Underdark was the other really great one, but we also got nightmare fuel like Anomen in Baldur’s Gate (though that gets better with mods + the final BG expansion) or just under-written characters or romances like Casavir in NWN2 (who was much better with mods) or hell, either of your choices in KotOR2 imho. But I used to play KotOR over and over for many reasons, such as holy shit a Star Wars game(!!) and one where you can actually be a female main character AND has that great Bioware storytelling... but a big reason was Carth.

A funny thing about Carth Onasi... if you play a male main character, you have a very different experience with Carth than if you play a woman. And even I can agree that hoo boy Carth gets tiresome quick if you play a male, as a female you at least get to flirt and that calms him down and evens him out a lot. But the one time I tried playing as a male, I didn’t make it off Taris because.. yeouch I could actually see what the guys playing were so mad about.

But hey, that voice. Raphael Sbarge, I love that voice. So like I said early on in these posts, I immediately knew I was going to romance Kaidan the very second I confirmed he was romancable, before I even ran back into the ship and met anyone on the crew aside from Joker and Kaidan.

And... that only got confirmed more and more as I went through ME for the first time. The character is smart, and capable, and respected you, and never questioned your command, but made his feelings pretty clear along the way. He could be a little doofy but in an adorable way with some of the things he said, honestly there was almost never anything I didn’t love about this character.

I realized some time ago that I have a thing for the Paladin archetype personally.

This is Casavir, from Neverwinter Nights 2, and in NWN2, there are two romance options for women. An under-written Lawful Good Paladin in his late 30′s who is willing to buck his superiors to do what he thinks is right but also places you on a pedestal and holds back all his emotions. He’s a romance option. Or....

Bishop, a chaotic evil ranger who insults you a lot, threatens to rape an NPC under your protection, and ultimately betrays you.

Most people who played NWN2 seemed to prefer the CE Ranger. I loved the paladin so much I wrote fix-it fic that I never have gotten around to publishing anywhere to retcon his terrible dumb ending.

There’s a fan-made romance mod that helps with the romances in this game, though I dislike a lot of what they did, ultimately I always use it.

In Dragon Age?

Ah yeah, the Templar-Warden. Love him. He does have that “Oh I’m so young and experienced tee-hee” thing going on that isn’t my favorite, (at this point mostly because I’m actually in my mid-40′s so uh, I’m just Old) but otherwise, yeah, love Alistair.

Dragon Age 2, I mean I usually romance Anders but... I’m not real excited about either him or Fenris, or even either of the ladies, though I have done Isabella’s romance (as well as Fenris’) and enjoyed it. I’d probably romance Avaline (or Varric!), if she were an option. But yeah, Anders mostly because he IS trying to do what’s right, even if he... well. You know.

But Dragon Age Inquisition?

Give me that Blackwall-angst. That stoic guy trying to be a Warden who comes undone for you. You’d think I’d go for Cullen, but hey this game gave us two paladin archetypes, though one is merely pretending, he still atones and becomes what he was trying to be, one way or another, if you let him. I picked this paladin archtype first because I did not like Cullen based on interactions with him in DA1 & 2. I like him well enough in DA:I but Blackwall is my guy here.

Out of all the many, many companions in SWTOR, who’s my fave?

If Aric Jorgan isn’t a Paladin-type I don’t know who is, especially since any romanceable Jedi are uh, all your female padawans (don’t get me started) until Lana (also female) comes along.

Hell, in a very long-running 4e D&D game I played from around 2009 to 2014 where my character fell in love with our party leader’s son, married him and fought the final boss 4 months pregnant with our twins. That character’s husband... was a paladin. I mean look at this art my friend picked out for his character’s son:

I mean dang, who (of those who are attracted to men of this type) wouldn’t?

I always pick the Paladin. The guy who is gonna Do What’s Right no matter what it costs him, the guy who’s gonna be loyal, the guy who may bottle up his emotions or keep them under control all the time but ultimately does what it takes to get the girl... that’s my fave. And that’s Kaidan.

I will also say my second fave archetype is rogue-with-a-heart-of-gold, and that’s more of a Garrus or Varric (if only he were a choice!!! :( ) type.. aka my second choice in these games.

Well that was a lot more words on that subject than I meant to do, so I’m going to just say real quick here that what I love about this first conversation with Kaidan is that he’s already no dummy, he knows something is up, and warns you about it.

We’ll save talk about his backstory for another day.

Let’s head downstairs.

Yay for sped-up elevators! What used to take like 20 seconds now takes like, four.

URDNOT WREX.

This another place where Shepard starts out just sticking their foot in their mouths completely. I feel like this is something the game definitely has problems with here. Shepard should know a lot more about the Genophage, like they should have about say, Spectres, even if the player doesn’t. So basically every response you can give to Wrex about the genophage and what his people are going through sounds really insensitive. Comparing the relatively minor First Contact War with the entire galaxy more or less uniting to keep the Krogan from taking over after the Rachni war seems pretty dumb, and also like something Shepard should already know.

Loredumping on the Krogans a bunch with Wrex is necessary, but I think it could have been done better. Though I think there are a lot of questions about the Krogan and the Genophage that ultimately are important but go unanswered. I’m going to be honest, because generally I want my companions to be happy and ultimately I want the happiest ending I can get, I usually cure the genophage and leave Wrex in charge. But also I don’t think that ends up with the happiest ending for the galaxy. Everything about the genophage is terrible, how it works, how it was administered, what it’s done to the Krogan as a people, but let’s be honest, the galaxy will also be in huge trouble just from a resources perspective if each krogan woman can have hundreds (or even just dozens) of babies a year, who are gonna all live a thousand years. There’s got to be a compromise that, eventually, hopefully Wrex works out if he’s alive at the end of ME3 or the council figures out with Wreav or whoever.

It is kinda funny though that here, I basically met Wrex at C-Sec, told him I’d help him with Fist, sent him to my ship, and basically just kidnapped him to go help with the rest of the mission. He wanted to be here, right? I can only assume I’m paying him a lot.

Ashley!

I do love Ashley Williams.

I’m not going to turn this into a “Is Ashley Racist” thinkpiece. I’ve read a lot of both sides of this argument and no, I don’t think she is. Some pieces of her attitude do need to be kicked up a bit, for sure. She’s got about the same issues with aliens as most of the species of the galaxy have with each other, which sometimes isn’t great, but she’s far from supporting Terra Firma.

She’s smart, she’s funny, a hell of a shot, she’s being held back due to her family name. I would love for if someday a Wilshenko OT3 were possible. I’d do that in an instant. I despise the fact that you can only keep Kaidan forever if you lose Ashley forever, though I don’t see that changing even in a remaster. Please Bioware, for the super ultra remaster?

I know I need to do another run through the game with Ashley alive. I don’t remember too much of what happens in ME3 when she’s there.

I also love that her story is so much one of family. From her stories of her sisters, to the point that it’s her own grandfather’s legacy that’s holding her back. She’s so grounded, she reminds us that there are civilians out there we’re keeping safe, a whole world we rarely see, up in space and in the middle of so much military conflict.

GARRUS.

First of all, whew Garrus looks amazing in the lighting and with the textures with ALOT/MEUITM. Very handsome.

Interestingly, Garrus does not really loredump on the turians. We absorb a lot of what we find out about the turians more naturally. Garrus is more all about C-Sec and the general politics of the Council, of Spectres, of C-Sec. Gonna be honest, I expected C-sec to play into the game as a whole a lot more than it did based on Garrus’ talks about it. I mean it was always there, but Bailey ends up being the face of C-Sec

Garrus’ Law vs. I Do What I Want attitude is a nice way to do a non-goody-two-shoes companion story without having to go evil. I love that Garrus’ story kinda mirrors our own as players, how are we going to get things done? Shove a blaster in people’s faces, accept collateral damage, and do whatever it takes to get it done? OR play by the rules, compromise, and see if that fixes things.

The thing is though, Mass Effect actually is great at giving us the illusion of choice without making a huge difference in the end. Like I mentioned before... not bringing Garrus to ME1 makes little difference in how he acts in ME2 outside of a few lines of dialog. Lots of things are like that, like pick Ash or Kaidan on Virmire, and yes one is always gone, but 80% of the content is basically the same from there on out for either character.

There are games out now that do that choice better. Pathfinder: Kingmaker is one I can think of. Or Tyranny. Things you choose can alter the endings of those games drastically, locking entire paths out of the game.

I used to think that was what I wanted. Until I played Kingmaker and locked myself out of things I really wanted without realizing it. I stopped playing the game, sad that my LI dumped me and wouldn’t come back without reloading many, many hours worth of game. Despite enjoying the game overall, I still haven’t gone back. When I do play again, I’ll probably keep a lot of tabs open of walkthroughs and tips on how to keep things going how I want. Kind of defeating the purpose of the game.

Anyway, I got super off track again. The point is, Garrus is the companion that gives us the most Choice in who he is. Which is cool. He illustrates our Paragon vs Renegade dilemma. And it’s neat that it does make changes in some of the things he says in the future, but overall, his story doesn’t change much no matter what you do (Unless you, ya know, get him killed in ME2).

And therein lies a problem with Mass Effect, and video games as a whole. It’s neat to see the little changes, but it’s rare for anything to be an actual Big Change, because... that’s a loooot of work for a developer and how much more money is all that going to cost him.

At some point in the future I’ll point out how lucky we are for what we did get, though.

Heeeey it’s Chief Engineer Greg Adams! I wonder how many people don’t even know he has a first name? Anyway, thank you for your one short conversation in which you explain how the Normandy works (honestly, great job with explaining this, Bioware, even if the science is ???) and like three sentences on who you are. Wasted opportunity to give you an actual character. Glad you like Tali, though! See you in ME3.

TALI!

Okay, I will totally accept that Shepard doesn’t know much past the basics of quarian society. That makes a lot more sense than Shepards not knowing much about asari.

The quarians are so much more of an original creation I feel like than a lot of what we’ve seen in the galaxy so far. Krogan? Basically Klingons. Turians? Space Romans. Asari? Twilek/Space Elves but ALL Hot Ladies. Qarians feel like something new though.

I mean, I guess before they had to live in suits they were pretty normal, but their entire culture doesn’t feel like something we’ve seen everyplace before. I mean I’ve seen space (g-slur) but, eh not really.

And Tali herself is such a good character. I mean, she does suffer a little from being Very Important with her father being one of five admirals in a population of six million people but, I’ll allow it. Nobody else on the crew has Very Important Parents. I mean Garrus’ father is a little high up in the ranks but that’s a non-factor, Ash’s grandfather was but he’s dead and never seen, Wrex’s father is a chieftan but none of those is central to their current story or as big as this one. I mean, Spacer Shep’s own mother is a captain of a ship. Tali herself in-game isn’t that sexualized -- most of that was the fandom’s doing. She’s young but also confident and has her shit together.

She shoulda been a same-sex romance in ME2/3 though, damnit!

Joker. Is. Amazing. And uh, also shoulda been a romance option.

Hey first of all, how great was it that they put in disabled representation in this game. I have read a few posts on how it could have been better, and definitely agree, but it’s also been so important to have say, Geordi LaForge as chief engineer of the Enterprise and also Joker here, in space, being awesome on spaceships. And he really earns his the right to his bravado in calling himself the best pilot in the galaxy.

Also? Casting Seth Green was such a great choice. I couldn’t imagine Joker as anyone else. I mean this is Bioware so we expect, and definitely got, great voice acting (except for... ugh you know, we’ll get there in ME3) but honestly Seth Green was a particularly good choice. I don’t care that he’s covered with sixteen layers of plot armor, he deserves it.

He’s the companion that we don’t ever get to take in the squad. (I mean, except for that brief amazing moment in ME2)

I only wish in ME1 he had as much to say as in ME2/3. At least he gets cool snarky lines after all the major missions.

One last thing before we get off the ship for awhile, I love that the crew is actually comprised of both men AND women in ME1. With different hairstyles and faces, and even skin tones. It’s nice to see they didn’t just reuse the same guy over and over for the nameless NPCs.

Well, I guess they get names in ME2. :v

Anyway, I would like to point out, that there are seventeen nameless NPCs on the Normandy.

Then there’s Adams, Tali, Garrus, Wrex, Ashley, Kaidan, Chakwas, Liara, Pressley, and Joker.

That’s twenty-seven people and eight sleep pods. Let’s remove the aliens, who couldn’t fit in a sleep pod (Garrus and Wrex), twenty-five people. Are there people sleeping in the sleep pods now? There must be, right? Everyone can’t be awake when we’re on the ship just because we’re there? How does that math add up? Who is sleeping where, HOW DOES IT WORK!?

Well, that’s their problem. I got my own bed. Kaidan can share.

Also just... don’t get me started on how stupid this is. I mean it’s nice having a shop on the ship but... the justification is terrible. We all know it. He was counted as one of the 17 nameless, btw.

Okay well, I was going to get off the ship this update but this is already stupid long and honestly I don’t have too much more content to post so, I’m gonna go actually play this game!

#mass effect #kaidan alenko #garrus vakarian #urdnot wrex #liara t'soni #tali'zorah #ashley williams #jeff joker moreau #joker #annakie's mass effect stuff

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ergomaria · 5 years

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The Past is Gone (but something might be found) Preview Pt. III

Somehow, the text from the original post was deleted when I tried to edit the tags to make this easier to sort. I’ve restored it. Once again, I’m just posting this as a reminder that I’m alive and still trying to write!

PLOT: Vann, Meetra, and Carth touch the wrong thing at the wrong shrine and are turned into themselves at 18. Alek finds himself paying his penance to the Force when he has to simultaneously watch over the trio while trying to figure out how to restore them to their proper ages.

Now saddled with three teenagers and very few clues, Alek nodded in acquiescence as he trudged back towards the Hawk. Luckily, they were all fairly well behaved during the walk. Once they reached the ship the real fun began.

“So, do any of you know the codes to get back on the ship?”

There was a long bout of uncomfortable silence during which it became clear that no adult knowledge about the freighter had stuck with the teens. The worst part was that Alek did know the codes but couldn’t admit that fact without seeming suspicious. The next best option was to rewire the door panel and go from there.

“Alright, here’s a better question. Do any of you know how to rewire a hatch?”

Predictably, it was Deran who raised his hand. “Obviously I can, at least if I have the correct tools. Unfortunately, I don’t have my normal gear…”

The amount of places that Vann had broken into or out of during his search for the Star Forge still grated on Alek’s nerves. He knew for a fact there was a multitool tucked somewhere in that worn black jacket, but it was yet another fact he couldn’t openly share. “This might sound absurd, but everyone check your pockets. If your clothing originally belonged to spacers, and it looks like it did, the original owners may have left something useful behind.”

It was a risky gamble since there was always a chance that one of them had identifying documents on their person. But Alek was hoping they’d left those behind to perform a mission as covert as hiding a highly dangerous Sith holocron. Onasi’s civilian clothing was the best indicator that this might be the case. For once the Force was on his side and the search produced nothing but various odds and ends. An extra reload for the blasters, a few credits, a ration bar, a medpac, and finally a multitool that Vann had definitely purchased illegally.

Deran was predictably pleased to find the item and immediately set to work rewiring the door to his own ship. Meanwhile, Alek quietly filed that irony away for later. When the exit ramp slid open with a smooth hiss, Onasi practically cracked a tooth in his desperate attempt to not look impressed.

The inside of the Hawk was in partial disarray, though it was hard to tell if this was from whatever had transpired to turn three adults into teenagers or the mere fact that it was Vann’s ship and thus naturally full of clutter. Either way, the mess made it easier for Alek to order the teens to remain in the main hold where it was neater and theoretically ‘safer’ while he ‘checked’ the rest of the freighter. As soon as he was sure they would stay put, he moved into the cockpit to look for further clues.

Despite his tendency towards random piles of mechanical parts, Vann was absolutely fastidious when it came to researching locations and making notes about what he discovered. Before the original trip to Dromund Kaas he’d compiled an entire datapad full of files on the history of Sith purebloods, their laws, and their customs. While Nirauan had significantly less information recorded, there was still a pad with multiple paragraphs discussing the planet’s connection to both the Rakata Infinite Empire and the Force itself. It seemed that the crew was aiming to land near a series of suspected Rakata ruins that had a notable presence.

Datapad in hand, Alek peeked into the main hold to inform his charges of his next step. “Just so you’re aware, I think I found a series notes mentioning that this planet has a strange connection to the Force. I don’t know if it has anything to do with your current situation, but we can’t rule it out. I have a friend who might be able to untangle the few clues we currently have, so I’m going to comm her using the ship’s unit. Just wait here until I’m done.”

“Is she a Jedi?” Meetra was sprawled across two seats looking dangerously bored.

“She was at one time, but she’s since left the Order. However, she’s very knowledge about certain subjects and I feel that her input will be extremely helpful.” One of the subjects she had a great deal of experience with was being a Force prodigy and another was ancient artifacts from the Infinite Empire, currently making her the galaxy’s only authority on the situation. When there were no further questions, Alek hurried away to contact Rakata Base in the hope of begging Bastila for assistance.

“Vann?” The young woman’s face immediately darkened when she saw who was on the other end of the call. “Why are you there and where is Vann?”

“I’m here because Meetra contacted me when there was a complication with their current mission,” Alek hissed as quietly as possible. Noting the concern that immediately overtook Bastila’s face he assured her, “Everyone is healthy. I hesitate to say ‘fine’ because, well… Somehow, through a combination of some Rakta ruins and a Sith holocron, all three members of this crew are currently teenagers with no memories of their adult selves. I’d estimate them between seventeen and nineteen, if I had to guess.”

The incredulous glare was absolutely scathing. “You’ve picked a poor time to develop a sense of humor.”

“Why in Sith hells would I joke about this? I currently have three teenagers in the hold of this damn ship who are convinced that I’m a Jedi Sentinel named Naver who happened to sense a disturbance in the Force. Since it’s blatantly clear that my creativity it lacking, you can be sure that I couldn’t make this bantha fodder up if I tried!”

“Dustil, can you please come here? Our former ‘master’ is on the comm and he believes that he’s being hilarious. Perhaps you can convince him to tell me what’s really going on.”

“What the hells is going on now, Malak?” The younger Onai looked supremely irritated, which actually mirrored how Alek was currently feeling.

“That’s not my name.”

Appearing unbothered by the correction, Dustil sneered for a moment before snapping, “What kinrath nest did Vann get my dad into this time?”

“Oh, did he not tell you? Supposedly through the will of the Force, Vann, Meetra, and your father are now teenagers with no memory of their adult lives.” Bastila looked equally unamused. “Funny, yes?”

“Hi-kriffing-larious.”

Alek was about two second from hanging up and hoping that Rand would be more helpful, if only to get Meetra back into her proper body, when a slender figure crept into the room just within view of the comm unit.

“Um, Knight Naver, I apologize for bothering you but…”

There was a loud pop of static from the other end of the comm, which turned out to be Bastila covering the microphone with her hand so that she could curse for about thirty seconds straight.

“Yes, Deran? I was actually just telling me friend Bastila a bit about you and the others in the hope that she’d be willing to assist us in figuring out what happened. Perhaps you’d like to speak with her about your current situation? It could be useful.”

It was hard to tell who was more bewildered by the entire scenario. Luckily, Deran’s natural curiosity quickly took hold and he slipped over to the console and situated himself before the camera. “Hello, Bastila was it? What did you want to ask me?”

“Oh stars…” The young woman was doing a poor job of disguising her surprise, though she still managed to stutter, “I apologize for my lack of manners. You just… remind me of someone I know. No matter. Actually, Deran, I was just wondering how, ah, how old you are.”

“You really aren’t a Jedi, are you? Sorry, that was rude. It’s just… everyone in the Order always seems to know everything about me. But uh, I turned eighteen a few months ago.”

“Two years before Knighthood…”

“Bastila, be careful. You don’t want to scare the boy!” While it was technically true that Deran became the youngest Knight in the order at age twenty, that wasn’t information his eighteen-year old self knew. It wasn’t until nineteen that his trials actually began.

Plastering on a false smile, the young woman quickly stammered, “That’s just a guess on my part. Though, of course, I could be wrong. It’s not like I can see the future and you’re so very… young.”

Unfortunately, just the mention of Knighthood had made Deran’s back go stiff, his jaw ticking in the corner even as his expression remained stoic and proper. “Well, that’s for the Council to decide. They know best.” Even at this age he sounded thoroughly unconvinced. “What else do you want to ask me?”

“That’s… that’s it.” Turning to Alek, Bastila stated, “I believe you and I’ll do whatever I can to help. Just tell me what you need.”

“I’ll send you all of the data I have in a minute. Let me just find out what brought Deran in here in the first place.”

“I came in to let you know that Carth and Meetra left the ship. They said that they got tired of waiting for you and decided to explore on their own.” The teen winced slightly. “Also, they may have been flirting? I’m not always great at telling that type of stuff, but it’s possible they just went to go and… you know.”

The snort of hysterics from Dustil was all the confirmation that Alek needed to know that this entire situation was his punishment from the Force. Part of him considered letting Meetra and Onasi do whatever they wanted. Someone else could deal with the fallout. But he also needed to get Deran out of the room to prevent him from snooping. “I’m concerned that they’re going to get themselves into trouble. There are some very powerful ruins on this planet and I’d hate for them to make the current situation even more complicated. Can I trust you to find them and bring them back safely?”

It was an underhanded ploy. Alek was fully aware that Deran’s facade of teenage bravado combined with his crippling fear of failure would make him agree to almost any task without question. But the former Sith didn’t have time to chase two teenagers down, all while trying to keep a third from learning that he was currently speaking with his own kriffing Padawan.

As expected, Deran immediately nodded. “Of course. I’ll bring them back as quickly as possible.”

It wasn’t until the teen’s footfalls disappeared off the ship that Alek sat down with a sigh, his head pounding from the sheer mental acrobatics required to keep this situation moving forward. As he uploaded the information from Vann’s datapad he grumbled, “For Force sake, Dustil. I thought your father would be the responsible one!”

The damned kid was still laughing. “Just checking, but is Meetra the teenager as pretty as Meetra the adult? Big blue eyes and wavy blonde hair?”

Attempting to be objective about the attractiveness of someone who was like a sister to him, Alek shrugged. “I suppose? She was more petite at this age, almost willowy. I honestly think she looks better with some muscle. Less delicate.”

“I don’t care either way, it’s just… My dad kinda has a type. Or, at least he did at that point in his life. My mom was petite with wavy, honey-brown hair. They met when he was twenty.”

“Please tell me you’re joking.”

“Nope, you can look up the files for Morgana Onasi if you want. I um, I have. Just to see her, you know? It helps me to remember her face…” Shaking away his melancholy, Dustil cleared his throat. “Ah, anyway, at eighteen my Dad was really responsible when it came to official things. Training and studying? He was incredibly dedicated. But when he had time to himself he kind of… let loose. Nothing really bad, just a lot of drinking and fooling around with his fellow cadets. Put a bunch of bored, horny teenagers in the same dorm and stuff happens.”

Alek had lived in the Jedi dormitories during puberty and was well aware of what could happen. He winced.

“The good news is that my dad definitely liked men at that age as well… Please don’t ask how I know this. It was a really awkward conversation that only happened because I got mad at him and… ugh. But the good news is that he might rediscover how amazing Vann is. He is really great at this age, right?”

“He’s actually an anxious mess who likes to pretend he’s confident, which just comes off as arrogance. It doesn’t help that he’s actually good at whatever he does. Honestly, I think your father currently wants to throttle him.”

“Ouch. Well, maybe they’ll lose all memory of this once they get restored to their actual ages!”

“We can only hope the Force is that kind.” Rubbing his forehead, Alek asked, “Bastila, have you looked over those files I sent?”

“I’m reading them now and I’ll run them through the Rakata archives when I’m done. But you should be aware that, while we have a significant amount of information on the Infinite Empire, we don’t have much else. Vann tries to update what he can, but it’s still nothing compared to what the Jedi possess.”

“Do your best, it’s still more than I have access to on this ship.”

“I do have an idea, but you’re not going to like it one bit.” Upon noting Alek’s hopeful expression, Bastila sighed...

#kotor 2 #kotor 2 fanfic #wip excerpt #revan #male Revan #vann chis #The Jedi Exile #Female exile #Alek Squinquargesimus #Malak #bastila shan #dustil onasi #my writing #not perfection but completeness

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curiosusdea · 4 years

Text

Video Game Questionnaire

Tagged by @magicalcrusaderfruit

Rules: Fill in your answers and tag some friends!

<<GAMES>>

First game you ever played: Like first first would probably Super Mario World on the SNES. Being the youngest of 3 I only really got to play when one of my other sister would get tired of it since they’d tag team it as Mario and Luigi without me.

Favorite game: Vampire the Masquerade: Bloodlines my dude. It’s the game that actually fully got me into gaming. Especially PC gaming. As a kid I for some reason thought PC gaming was a whole new horrible world since I grew up with consoles mostly. Bloodlines helped me realize I honestly prefer PC and that there’s a whole world out there of not co-op or multiplayer games (which I was restricted to growing up due to having siblings. We weren’t really allowed many non multiplayer or co-op games since that would leave people out and such).

Game you hated at first but now love: Arkham Knight. I was part of the group that went for the PC release and decided to power through the lag and terrible frames and just overall broken hell to finish it. It was a terrible experience but I needed it. After it got all fixed way later I actually came to really enjoy it.

Game you used to love but now hate: Knights of the Old Republic. Now, hear me out it’s a good game and all but I’ve just gotten kinda bored with it. Played it too many times I guess. Plus I’m actually not that huge of a Star Wars fan so there’s not a giant draw from a fandom level for me.

Game with the best group / companion(s): Dragon Age: Origins

A game with your favorite ending: Portal 2.

A game with the worst ending: Imma agree with Magical here and say Fallout 4. Just, why?

Best character customization: That’s not a hentai game? Skyrim. Unmodded it’s already pretty good when it comes to variety but mod that shit and it’s beauty.

<< HEROES AND COMPANIONS >>

Your favorite playable character: Zero from Borderlands. He’s a babe and I honestly just love Borderlands. Plus his skills are basically when I tend to go for in games so it makes for the perfect set up for me.

The funniest playable character: My boy Timothy the Jack Doppleganger. Helps that one of his possible skills is Jack coming on to spew “inspiring” thoughts.

Your favorite companion(s):

Dragon Age - FUCKING CULLEN (he’s top tier husband material and I fucking waited patiently for Inquisition just to finally husband this bastard), Alistair

Skyrim- Cicero, Serana, Marcurio

Fallout - NICK!, MacCready, Curie (I may be biased due to name but you know she’s wife material), Dogmeat, Lily

Mass Effect - Liara, Tali

Star Wars - Carth, Atton

Companions you could live without:

Fallout - Cait, Piper, Preston, X6-88, Clover, anyone in New Vegas minus Lily (seriously maybe part of my lack of fondness from the game stems from the fact I can’t stand any of the companions)

Mass Effect - Ashley, Jack, Kaidan

Dragon Age - Fucking Solas (I hate this bastard with a fucking passion like ugh I just I cant), Shale, Oghren, Vivienne

<<RELATIONSHIPS>>

Favorite game relationship(s): Inquisitor/Cullen, Geralt/Yen, Darien Gautier/FemVestige. Yeah I know it’s not like a full on relationship but but he’s beautiful and I love him. And I mean if you count Smolder Scrolls as being cannon it works.

Favorite companion banter: Dragon Age: Origins. Just but Alistair in with Morrigan and it’s a good time. Or Alistair with literally anyone.

A relationship you loved but went bad: AGAIN DARIEN. My love. Why must we be separated. Also need I say Yuri from Doki Doki?

A relationship you weren’t sure of but loved: Honestly, when I started Mass Effect I wasn’t sure about Liara. Like I started with a thing with Kaidan but grew to dislike him and when I tried a second save I thought ok I’ll try Liara. Never looked back.

A character you wish you COULD romance: OK I’m not a furry buuuut Razum-dar. Let me romance that cat. Smolder Scrolls just made me want to romance him even more. Why do you tease me ESO.

A minor character you wish could be a companion: Ser Gilmore. He deserved better

<<FUN>>

Shoutout to a random NPC: To that random merchant just happening to walk by a dungeon in Skyrim as I finished looting it and decided to carry fucking everything out- I love you. You know how long it woulda taken me to get back to a city to fucking sell that shit? You saved my life sir.

A game you love watching playthroughs for and want to play: Right now it’s Predator Hunting Grounds

Love watching playthroughs but won’t ever play: Dead by Daylight. I used to love the game but after some toxic hell I don’t play anymore. Still fun to watch though.

Online gaming or solo?: Solo unless it’s specifically with friends. I’m not fond of MMOs or playing with strangers.

Why do you play video games?: Because it’s fun. I get to be whoever and get to explore without consequence.

Uh I don’t really know who to tag so if you wanna try it go ahead.

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