#you date that lady go on queen give us everything

[ifortom]

Shrike - T.H.

Pairing: Royal Guard!Tom x Princess!Reader

Summary: A princess and a royal guard live a forbidden romance, hiding their feelings from the world. As they try to keep their love a secret, challenges and moral dilemmas test the strength of their relationship. Will true love triumph over conventions and royal expectations?

W/A: 5k

A/N: I know it's been a while and I'm about to post other stories but this one popped into my head and I had to get it out. Hope you like it.

"Do you ever think about what life would be like for us if things were different?"

"Honestly?" He stares at you. "No. Despite everything, I'm satisfied with what we have."

He mocks. "You mean doing everything in secret? Not being able to touch you in public? Or going out on dates? Not being able to talk about you with others?"

"I meant having our most intimate moments just for the two of us. Memories that will be ours alone." You say, intertwining your fingers with his. "Don't you find dates in the garden under the moonlight extremely romantic?"

"It would be if I weren't worrying about what might happen if they found out."

You move closer and settle into his lap, legs around his waist.

"Tommy, can we enjoy what we are experiencing now? At this moment I only see you and me. No one else."

His hands go to your waist, holding you close, while yours run through his hair.

"I can't imagine myself without you." He says with his mouth next to yours, breaths mixing and becoming one.

"Then don't." Slowly, you start moving your body, his hands on your waist guiding your movements. "I'm right here." And your mouths collide as you push him until he is lying completely on the blanket in the grass.

Your mouth travels to his neck, leaving marks along the way. Your hands now unbutton each button on his shirt. You feel his heavy breathing, his heart racing.

And you get lost in each other.

..............

"Why that face, mate? You seem too happy. What happened?" Harrison asked as they walked side by side to the meeting room.

"Nothing happened, what are you saying?"

"Nothing? Come on, Tom. We're heading toward a scolding for not keeping full guard time and you've got a smile on your face."

"No, I don't."

"Are you kidding me? I've known you since you were in diapers, you can't hide much from me" He snapped his fingers. "I bet you were with someone. Did you get laid?"

"Shut up, Haz."

"Ha! So that's it! Who was it? Who had the displeasure of spending the night with you?"

"Harisson…"

"Who was it? What was she like? Was it good?"

"Mate!”

"Or was she bad, that's why you don't want to talk? Did you go all the way?"

"For the love of God, Harrison, shut the fuck up." Tom stopped abruptly.

Harrison raised his arms in surrender.

"Tommy boy... I see you sneaking out at night, not to mention the times you ask me to change shifts." He rubs one of his hands over his face. "And I give you all my support but I would like to know why you have been risking your job, you know?"

Tom looked to the side, clenching his jaw.

"You're my friend, and I'm glad you seem happier too. I'm sorry I asked."

"I can't talk about it.” Tom says in a barely audible whisper. "I just…I can't."

"OK no problem." Harrison says turning his back to Tom and continuing down the path.

"Haz, I really can't, I'm sorry." Tom said following him.

"You don't have to apologize, Tom. And you don't even owe me an excuse. You do your thing and you tell me when you're ready. Just… be careful."

“It's not just about me. There’s other people… and I…”

"Gentlemen!" Tom and Harrison stopped and bowed before the queen's presence. “Why are they still here? The king is waiting for you."

"We are on our way, Your Majesty." Tom said.

"You will be part of a very special moment, but I will let the king do the honors of the news." She says, clasping her hands in front of her body. "Now go, we'll be there in a few minutes too."

And at that moment, Tom notices the presence of another person besides the queen and her faithful lady.

It was very rare for you not to express any kind of reaction to his presence. Tom was always greeted with a tempting look and a small smile. Carefully so that no one would notice that this small gesture meant more than just a small, polite greeting.

And Tom knew you well enough to understand that you weren't okay. Something serious happened or was about to happen that worried you.

Tom and Harrison bowed as the queen led the way towards the grand doors of the castle's main hall. You followed your mother's footsteps slowly, the two guards, the king's confidants, followed close behind.

Several thoughts were floating through his head at that moment. Did you regret it? Why did you go so far? Why did he get carried away so easily?

He should have stopped.

He should have stopped the moment you started seeing each other in secret. He should have stopped before the first kiss.

He should have stopped when he realized his feelings were bigger than just attraction. He should have stopped before realizing he loved you.

The hall doors opened for them. The king was sitting in one of the resting chairs in the center of the room. The small coffee table contained cups that released hot steam, two bodies rose from the padded sofa that surrounded it.

It was funny to think that this same environment could host more than a hundred people dancing and twirling in fancy clothes, and now it looked like any other room where people gathered to gossip and discuss mundane matters.

"Finally, my ladies. We have waited long for you." The king said stretching out his hand, calling the ladies to come closer to them. Tom and Harrison stopped a few feet away from the center, as did the queen's lady-in-waiting who stood between them.

"We're sorry, My King. We were just finishing getting ready. Y/N needed to prepare properly." The queen said, resting her hands on your back and positioning you in front.

"Not that it's really necessary. The princess is very beautiful." A sweet, unfamiliar female voice said as she bowed to Y/N who returned the gesture. The man next to the woman did the same. "It's a pleasure to meet you Your Highness."

The king finally looked beyond the two most beloved ladies of his court.

"Behold, my faithful squires. Come closer." The two guards approached and bowed before the king and his guests. "These are the lord and lady of Wintershire."

"Your Majesty!"

"These are Harrison and Thomas. They are my two best guards and accompany me in everything related to the kingdom." The king looked thoughtful and melancholy. "Thomas is the son of the great Holland. My best friend and the greatest of my warriors."

"Of course, I'm sorry for your loss." The unknown man said and Tom just nodded.

"It was such a loss, we all miss him." The king continued, his gaze fixed on Tom. "I'm glad Thomas followed in his father's footsteps, after all he grew up here and knows this place like no one else."

"We are grateful for your service, Thomas. You and Harrison are important at this time." The queen said.

"Good, now that everyone is here we can move on." The king announced, as Thomas and Harrison returned to where they were before, you and your mother sat down next to the family matriarch. You were facing him and Tom noticed your resistance to meeting his eyes, not even for a small second.

"Not everyone, Chris isn't here yet. I apologize for that, Your Majesty." The lord said.

"Don't worry, he was in the barn, getting to know his surroundings. I heard he's great at riding." The king pointed.

"Ah, yes! Our little Chris is almost like an athlete. He likes to play sports and ride. We raised him to be active as well as being very intelligent and helpful." The woman said.

"I'm sure he'll make a great husband." The queen said, resting her hands on yours that were in your lap. "A good man capable of taking care of a woman, who likes to take risks and is intelligent."

The world seemed to have stopped and Tom's breathing became quick and shallow. His hands, which were behind his back, wrapped around each other in an attempt to stabilize himself to what he had just heard. Husband. That was what this special moment was all about. A marriage agreement.

"I'm sure Chris will make the princess very happy. He's young and good. He still has a lot of life ahead of him." The man said. "I know we're his parents, but we raised him for this."

This means that this marriage agreement had existed for a long time. Even before anything starts between you. You had always been promised to someone and yet you surrendered to Tom and the fantasy you created together.

Tom’s eyes were fixed on you and your posture. But you refused to look up from your own hands.

"Of course, we believe so. But it is important that we know that this agreement is also political. Y/N in a few years will take the throne and we need a companion who will support her." The king interfered. "This is for the good of the kingdom."

"Yes, Your Majesty. We believe in the future of the kingdom just as we believe in Your Highness and the decisions she will make."

"It's important that they have heirs. The lineage needs to continue. We are happy to have been gifted with our sweet Y/N but the ideal is more than two children." The queen said and once again, Tom's heart screamed asking to be ripped out of his chest so he wouldn't feel anything anymore.

"Chris is a healthy young man and has regular medical care, I believe this will not be a problem." The lord said.

You, who hadn't said anything until now, finally slowly looked up. Your eyes focused on Tom and he noticed the sadness within them.

“I’m happy for what we’re going to build.” You said, looking at the couple sitting in front of you. "For the kingdom…"

The hall doors opened again and a man walked towards them.

"I'm sorry I'm late, I got a little lost on the way." He said as he bowed and sat down next to the couple.

"I'm glad you decided to join us." The king said using a sterner tone, one that Tom had heard many times.

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. The castle is very beautiful and large, I got lost while looking at the paintings in the corridors."

"Let's stop it from happening again." The queen intervened. "I think we can end it here. Y/N, why don't you take Christopher to see our indoor garden?"

"That's a great idea. Harrison will accompany you." Tom didn't understand why the king didn't order him to come along but he wouldn't argue about it. Mainly due to the fact that he wasn't sure he could take a step without falling.

Christopher stood up and extended his hand towards you, which you delicately accepted. You walked to the door together, passing Tom. Harrison following you a few feet away.

The king got up, and walked to where Tom was.

"You're dismissed for today, Thomas. I want you to rest." He said resting his hand on Tom's arm.

And in that moment, Tom realized that the king knew. He knew something was going on between one of his guards and his sweet, delicate daughter.

And he was sorry for what had just happened. What he caused. Both to his own daughter and to the young man he had seen grow up to be a man.

Without a word, Tom turned and left the room. He knew how disrespectful the gesture had been, but nothing was going through his mind at that moment.

It was stupid to think that at some point your relationship would become real. Real to the world. Not just hidden and in the dark.

He knew the fantasy would come to an end, but now it all seemed so real.

He doesn't remember the path he took to his quarters. Tom let it be taken on automatic. The years spent in that same place and the route traveled so many times were already engraved in his memory.

Tom let himself take a deep breath when he was in his comfort space. His own room. A bad idea because everything inside reminded him of you.

From the sheets on the bed you've rolled around in together so many times to the desk in the corner with scribbled pieces of paper and books waiting to be finished.

Just like in his heart, you were present in any physical place he looked.

...

Your steps were silent and light. The floor was cold in direct contact with your bare feet. You never walked through this wing of the castle without telling Tom that you were on your way.

He always made sure the hallways were empty and no one accidentally bumped into you.

But the situation required a drastic measure and you hadn't seen Tom since the conversation in the main hall. It was not possible to communicate with him at any time during the day. And a lot needed to be said and clarified between you.

When you arrive in front of the familiar door, you hesitate. Your hand rises and closes into a fist, ready to make Tom aware of your presence.

Slowly, your hand comes into contact with the wood. Two beats with a long interval between them. He will know it's you.

It was long seconds or what felt like minutes before the door finally opened. Tom was already ready for bed. The white t-shirt and pants made it clear. He looked at you and his cold expression scared you. Despite his red, puffy eyes, Tom seemed expressionless.

"Your Highness, you shouldn't be here at this time." He said and the royal title he used startled you even more.

"I know I shouldn't come unannounced but… I haven't seen you since." You replied with a low voice.

"Want me to take you back to your quarters?" Tom rested his hands on the doorframe and looked around the hallway.

"What…no! I, Tom…we need to talk. I need you to listen to me."

"Your highness, please, it's late. You can't be here alone, and you need to warm up." He ran his eyes over your body covered in a thin coat that only covered your arms, your legs exposed.

"Stop saying that!" You cut him off.

"What?"

"Your Highness." You mocked.

"It's your title. It's what you are."

"No! You call me by my name, it's always been that way. Stop it." You answered. "Tom, please." You pleaded.

He let out a breath and entered the room again, leaving the door open for you to follow. You closed it and leaned back against it. Just like you had done so many times before, the only difference was that he wasn't the one pressing you against it. There was no heat, passion or lust. It was fear. Fear kept you away from him.

"Tom…I, I'm so sorry."

He clicked his tongue, letting out a sound of disapproval.

“What are you sorry about, Y/N?” The way he said your name gave you goosebumps.

"I didn't know…that they were coming today. Nor that my father planned for you to be there."

"So you're sorry I found out?"

"What? No! You think I wouldn't tell you? How could I keep this from you?" You spoke as you approached him.

"Well, you hid it Y/N. How long have you been promised to him? How long have you known about it? That he was coming?" He looked at you in disbelief, the pain in his eyes that filled with tears. "It felt like it was already done before you were even born."

"It wasn't certain that it would happen, my parents hadn't talked about it for a long time. And I thought they had given up, that I could choose what I want."

"You're so innocent, Y/N. Look at the world we live in! You know that would never happen. You don't seem to remember the stories they told us as kids." He laughed. "Don't you remember the exiled princess because she decided to follow her own path without following the rules?"

"That's just a story."

"It doesn't matter, Y/N. You have a duty to fulfill, for the kingdom. For what your ancestors built. Just as I have a duty to my father and everything he did for me. You have a kingdom to rule. And I have a queen to protect." He laughed mockingly, every word spoken filled with venom. Tom needed to push you away, for both of your sakes. "That's who we are, nothing more. You need to carry heirs. You need to live a long, happy life. With a partner and a big family."

Every word was a stab in your heart. You never thought about the possibility of heirs that weren't yours and Tom's. There is no one who could be the father of your children other than him.

And the thought of seeing you carrying another man's children destroyed Tom.

"No! Tom, stop!" Your hands went to your hair, tears running down your face without stopping. "Please."

"What hurts me is that you kept this from me… Y/N, we've been at this for years. You knew everything. Is this fair to me?"

Tom's hard, hurt look and the tears that started to roll down his face broke your heart even more. He walked towards you as you took steps back. Until you feel the surface of the table full of books.

Tom's face stopped inches from yours.

"Why did you do this to me? Why did you make me fall in love with you? While you knew this ending was inevitable?" His hand went up to your hair, touching it lightly. "Why did you let me touch you in ways no one else has?"

"Tommy…" You whispered, your hands held his white shirt tightly, as if you didn't want to let go. "I didn't mean to hurt you, you know that!"

"To be honest I knew it would end at some point, I knew I could never have you forever." You closed your eyes. "But I didn't think it would hurt this much, Y/N."

Tom's face got closer and closer to yours. His face wet with tears. His lips barely touched yours, his eyes locked on yours.

"You need to go rest, Your Highness. It's been a busy day." And with that he walked away completely, walking and creating a distance between you beyond the physical. It was Tom putting an end to everything you had lived together and everything you ever thought about planning.

"Tommy, no! Stop! I'm going to fix this, I'm going to fix everything. They're going to listen to me. I'm not going to marry someone else." You say between sobs. "I love you, Thomas. You're the one who matters to me."

Tom closed his eyes tightly upon hearing your confession. Finally hearing what he had wanted for years.

And you waited for his response but nothing came out. Tom continued looking at you without showing any reaction.

"I will escort you to your quarters, Your Highness." And his cold tone made you realize it was the end. He wouldn't give in anymore. He accepted that there was no other alternative to your relationship.

Tom wouldn't be able to continue a secret romantic relationship with you even if you begged. And he knew you wouldn't do that. How could he continue knowing that in the end, only the other man would be recognized as your partner? He couldn't handle knowing that you would kiss, sleep and live with someone else.

You are not a difficult person to like. A sweet and caring personality, full of life and smiles despite the difficulties faced. Tom knows that just spending a short time with you would make anyone fall in love, especially if you opened up and showed your true self. Not just the future queen of the court, with diplomatic thinking. But that side of you that is still maturing, along with teenage jokes and dreams.

Tom knows your potential, and he knows that you will become a brilliant queen. He knows that the future of the kingdom will be in good hands when the time comes.

He just hopes that the person next to you is able to take care of you in your most vulnerable moments. May he listen to you and support you, just as he tried and did several times during all these years.

Tom understands how aware you are of your role in this story. He knows that you will walk to triumph and that this moment is just heartbreak. But you will overcome. You were born for this.

You took a deep breath, seeking back your composure and that appearance of a person raised in a court.

"It's not necessary. I can go alone."

You walked quickly to the door but before opening it you turned and faced Tom once again.

"I just want you to know that I was willing to try. I was ready to face whatever it took to achieve what I want. I thought you knew me well enough to understand that."

Again, Tom said nothing. He just nodded and stared at the floor.

You turned around and opened the door, and to your surprise, another familiar guard was about to knock on wood. Harrison was startled by the abrupt manner that the door had been opened and his eyes widened as he realized what was happening.

The princess with red eyes and a wet face, in the middle of the night, wearing only a robe that covered her arms and in a guard's room.

His mouth opened and closed, as if he was trying to say something but couldn't form a sentence that made sense.

With no time for manners, you just took a step forward and Harrison understood that he needed to get out of the way. He gave you space to the side and you left Tom's quarters like a breeze, quick and light.

Harrison watched your form until you disappeared into one of the hallways. He looked into the room and saw his best friend with his posture hunched over and his eyes fixed on the floor.

And the pieces of the puzzle finally fell into place.

...

Two months had passed since the fateful day of the end. You and Tom only crossed paths sometimes and he accompanied your family when something needed to be resolved politically. Until now, Tom's work was focused on meeting the king's needs, but he knew that would change once you ascended the throne.

Nothing more was said between you. Unless it was something related to the kingdom. Tom realized that there was no longer any type of relationship between you that was not strictly related to the role that each played within the court.

He noticed how close you and Chris had become. Your future husband had come to spend some time at the palace so that he could begin to get used to it and understand how everything worked. You spent a lot of time together and Chris really wasn't a bad person. Despite always wanting to be pleasant, he has already imposed himself on some of your decisions and demonstrated relevant opinions.

And you weren't offended by his words. Maybe sharing the burden of the crown with someone who understood these difficulties wouldn't be so bad.

The wedding would take place in 6 months, and the entire palace was already preparing for the big event. Menus were being chosen, as were the flowers and fabrics that would be used in the decoration.

Surprisingly, you felt fine. The days were always full and you always experienced something or met someone new that made you forget your heartbreak. Tom was your first love and everything you experienced will always be alive in your heart, but you could survive it.

Tom was at the entrance to the castle, watching the different groups of guards preparing to take up their posts when he heard his name called.

"Hello, Thomas!"

He turned around and found Chris, with his black hair and tanned skin.

"Sir." Tom bowed.

"It's a beautiful day, isn't it?" He stopped next to Tom and stared at the landscape. "I like this place, despite all the movement every day."

"You'll get used to it." Tom laughed softly.

Tom didn't harbor any resentment toward Christopher. He understands very well that it was not his choice. Neither of you had any choice in what you were living through now and he wouldn't blame anyone for his broken heart.

"I heard that… the king told me… that you will be going to Solastria." Chris hesitated.

Solastria was nothing more than court territory. It was a good few miles away from the palace and was the place where new guards were recruited and trained.

Tom decided that this would be his role in the story.

He would be responsible for introducing new guards to the palace. Strong and strategic warriors ready to defend the kingdom and the person he cared most about.

Tom can't deny that he's happy for you. Even though you seem fine, he knows that you have your moments and that it hasn't been easy for you. He notices this in the difficulty you have in maintaining a simple conversation with him or having minimal eye contact.

But you've been doing well. Both in the diplomatic tasks that the king has gradually passed on to you and in more personal matters such as marriage. He knew you could do it.

"Yes, I will be leaving in two days. They demanded my presence there."

"I bet the reason is because you're one of the best warriors around here." Chris laughed.

"They tend to fill my ego like that."

"Well, it's a shame you're leaving. I think I could learn a lot from you. But I understand! And I wish you luck." Chris said, resting a hand on Tom's shoulder.

"Thank you for that."

"But I have to ask…does she know?" Tom quickly turned to Chris. "The princess…does she know you’re leaving?"

Tom tried to look clueless. But Chris just laughed softly.

"She told me… about you. Strange isn't it? But what you don't know, Thomas, is that Y/N and I have known each other for a long time and have kept in touch." He took a deep breath. "She's my friend. A dear friend. I trust her and she trusts me."

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to interfere in your relationship." Tom responded defensively, facing the courtyard again.

"It's not about that. We are fulfilling a duty, we were taught that way. Y/N is not the only one who was forced to abandon her dreams and plans for a perfect future." Chris swallowed hard. "I also left things behind, people. And I said goodbye to them. I ended a cycle. And I kept the memories."

Tom felt his eyes burn, but he wouldn't let the tears come down. Not in front of a stranger.

"I will do everything to make Y/N happy. Or at least to make her feel less alone. Whatever is in my power and whatever she allows me."

"Thank you. I appreciate it." Tom said, voice barely above a whisper.

"Make the right decision, Thomas. Don't wait to regret it later." Chris said and turned around walking away from Tom.

...

"What is your greatest desire?" You asked him as you rested on his bare chest.

"Hmm…" Tom pretended to think. "I want to defeat an ogre."

You clicked your tongue, laughing and patting his chest.

"I'm serious, Tommy!"

"I'm serious. Can you imagine? Captain Holland defeats a disgusting and grotesque ogre that was trying to ravage a small village within the kingdom's boundaries. I bet it would be a success"

"Oh yeah? And who do you intend to impress with an act of courage like that?"

"I don't know. Maybe the knights would respect me more… you know, stop asking me what I do to be so good." You laughed.

"You're very cocky, you know that?"

"Or else, I would impress beautiful maidens in search of true love with a charming warrior."

You feigned surprise after his words.

"So me being naked under your covers means nothing to you?"

"But you know what they say, maybe everything I needed most is right under my nose. So there's only one person I want to impress." He said as he squeezed your waist with one hand while the other supported his head from behind.

"You convinced me." The two of you laughed together.

Your fingers trailed down his exposed chest.

“My biggest wish is to do this forever.”

"Sweetheart, unfortunately our bodies have limits that need to be respected. But we can work around that with a few water breaks."

"Oh Thomas! Stop it." You propped yourself up on one elbow, your face now inches from his. "I meant you and me, together. Regardless of form and place. You are my greatest desire and a life by your side is my dream."

He smiled and placed one of his hands behind your head, pulling you close and finally finding your lips.

"Let's think about it tomorrow, okay? Right now it's just you and me." He said when he disconnected your lips.

Tom watched the palace doors close after he left, feeling like this would be the last time he would see this image.

He didn't say goodbye. He wouldn't have the courage to see your reaction when he told you that he was leaving and that there was nothing more to be done in that place.

Life in the palace was beautiful. He lived, learned and loved. And he wanted to keep the memories of this place untouched. Only the beautiful would be remembered, not the pain and sadness.

Tom would love you for eternity and even though he couldn't prove it by being by your side, he decided that he would continue to protect you, even from afar. Just as he swore to his father that he would follow in his footsteps and take care of the kingdom, he also made a promise to himself.

That would prevent any danger from crossing the border of that kingdom and no harm would come to the place you loved so much.

And you would be happy.

[andvys]

I knew you'd linger like a tattoo kiss | part 15

Warnings: slight angst, mostly fluff though. Steve is not really in this chapter, don't be mad, please. He will be back in the next chapter.

Pairings: Steve Harrington x fem!cheerleader!reader, Steve Harrington x Nancy Wheeler, Eddie Munson x fem!reader

Summary: You need reassurance after the horrible date with Ray, and your best friend is there to give it to you.

Word count: 4k+

A/N: The amazing flashback scene of Eddie and Steve was written by @hellfire--cult when we were going over ideas together, so credit goes out to her, also thank you for listening to my rambles and for sharing your ideas with me 💕 ps: if you haven't read any of her stories, go do it right now, do I wanna know? had me in a chokehold

series masterlist

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The bruises on Eddie’s knuckles don’t surprise you, it was to be expected after seeing Ray’s face but it still makes you freeze a little. All night, he has been hiding them from you, doing everything to keep you from seeing them but now you do, you see them clearly, the cuts and the bruised knuckles, you wonder if he has any others that may be hidden under his clothes. 

With your elbows leaned against the counter and your face propped up by your hands, you stare at him as you watch him make the grilled cheese sandwiches. You aren’t hungry but Eddie always insists on making you something to eat when you come over. 

Eddie can feel your eyes on him, he knows that you know. Yet, neither of you speak up about it. You act like nothing's wrong and so does he, but he knows that a conversation about what happened is bound to happen tonight.

“I don’t feel like going back to school,” you groan. 

A smile tugs at his lips, he glances up at you after he flips the sandwich over in the pan. 

“The good A student doesn’t feel like going back to school?” He chuckles. 

“Shut up,” you snort, “just because I have good grades, doesn’t mean that I like going to school. Besides, you are the nerd out of the two of us, dungeon master.”

His eyes widen and he places a hand on his chest, dramatically. You try not to stare at his knuckles again. 

“Me? A nerd?”

“Yeah, you’ve been studying way more than me!”

“I’m studying with you, sweetheart. You basically force me into doing it–”

“Because I want you to graduate, dumbass,” you exclaim, reaching for the bowl of grapes, you pick out one and throw it at him, giggling when it hits him on the forehead. 

“Ouch! We don’t throw food around, young lady!” He says with a stern voice, pointing at you with the spatula. 

You giggle, “I’m sorry, sir.”

Shaking his head, he huffs with a smile on his face. 

“Are you ready for your gourmet dinner, queen?” He jokes as he takes the sandwich out of the pan and puts it on the plate. 

“I’m always ready for Chef Munson’s amazing grilled cheese sandwich,” you grin, taking the plate from his hands, “it’s better than any other sandwich.”

He snorts at the nickname, smirking at you as he puts his sandwich on his plate as well. 

“One of these days, I’m gonna bake you a cake.”

You raise your brows, taking your plate as you follow him to the small table. 

“A cake? What kind of cake, Eddie?” You ask, sitting down on the chair. 

“Whatever cake you want,” he chuckles, taking a bite out of his sandwich. 

“I think we should make one together, that way nothing goes wrong.” 

He frowns, mouth twisting and looking at you, offended.

“Eat your sandwich, you must be hangry.”

Eddie’s eyes flash with amusement when you giggle at his words, taking your sandwich, you look at him as you bite into it. He watches the way you chew it with a smile on your face, nodding at him.

“Good?” 

“Hmm.” 

He chuckles when you hold your hand in front of your mouth, “very good.”

He pats himself on the shoulder, jokingly. 

After you both finish eating, you retreat back to his room with the candy you brought him from the store. Eddie gets comfortable on the bed, opening the bag of m&m’s and reaching for the remote to turn on the TV that he got from his old neighbor after helping him change the tires on his Chevy truck. 

Eddie glances at you, watching the way you take a seat on his chair instead of the bed, next to him. You have been distant all day, you didn’t even hug him when you said ‘hello’, the way you usually do. He knows that you might not feel comfortable with physical touch yet but you hugged him yesterday morning and you let him kiss your hands, you didn’t seem to mind that. 

He flips through the channels but he keeps watching you, watching the way your brows furrow. You look like you want to say something but something keeps you from doing so, so he gives you more time, waits for you to be the one to speak up, the way he always does.

He adjusts his pillows and leans back, offering you some of the candy, he holds out the bag to you. 

You shake your head, giving him a small smile. 

“Why are you so far away?” He asks as he puts the candy on the nightstand, “you can’t see the TV from there.”

He sees the way you hesitate when he pats the spot next to him, the way you seem to think of something that makes your eyes flash with sadness, the way your eyes then soften when they meet his. You push yourself up from the chair, you tug at your black sweatshirt as you walk towards the bed and finally sit down next to him. You lean back and pull your knees up to your chest. 

“Are you cold?” He asks, eyeing you slowly. 

You shake your head, murmuring a small ‘no’. 

He still reaches for the blanket that he bought a few months back. You get cold easily. 

He places the maroon colored blanket over your knees, giving you a sweet smile when you lay your head on your knees as you look at him with soft eyes. 

“What?” He whispers, chuckling. 

“Nothing,” you say with a smile that fades a little when you take a look at his knuckles. Eddie is surprised that you haven’t confronted him about them yet, how you haven’t asked or said anything. He wonders if you are mad or disappointed in him, or even scared – to think that you could be scared of him, makes him feel so horrible. He never wants you to be scared of him. 

He sees the way your eyes lose focus, you get lost in your thoughts, he can see it on your face, the way it loses the smile completely. He tries not to stare, but he can’t take his eyes off of you, he too gets lost in his thoughts when he thinks of the previous night. 

Neither of you pay attention to the sitcom playing on the TV, neither of you listen to the voices or the laughter, you are both too deep in your thoughts. Eddie clenches his bruised fist, trying not to wince at the ache in his side. 

You stare at him and when your eyes meet again, you finally open your mouth to ask the question that has been lingering on your mind for the past two days. 

“Do you want to have sex with me?” 

Eddie freezes. His eyes widen and flash with confusion.

That isn’t your question. 

You regret it, instantly. Yet, you repeat it, phrasing it differently this time. 

“L-Like, do you expect me to have sex with you?” You ask nervously and with a guilty feeling in your stomach.

You never thought that that is what Eddie wanted or wants from you, you always thought that he was just your friend, the friend who loves you unconditionally and platonically. You never once thought that his touches meant that he wanted more and you still don’t believe that but Ray’s words have pushed you into a bad mindset, again. He made you feel insecure and so horrible about yourself. 

You aren’t interesting, he said. You are nothing but a good fuck, that is what he said.

“W-What?” 

You don’t look at him any longer, your eyes are filled with tears and you are looking down, unable to face him and it worries Eddie. 

“Of course not, sweetheart,” he says softly, wanting to reach out to touch your hand but he decides against it, not wanting to make you feel uncomfortable, “why would I expect that from you?”

You shrug, sniffling quietly. 

“I-It’s just Ray, he said some really nasty things to me.”

Eddie tries to stay calm, he tries to keep his anger at bay, not wanting to scare you.

“What did he say?”

You lick your lips as you try to blink away the tears that you don’t want to fall, you glance up at him again, you look into his chocolate eyes, feeling a sense of comfort in your chest when you stare at them. 

“He just, he was nice all night, we went to the movies and then we got some drinks and I-I thought that he really just wanted to hang out, to get to know me and just leave it at that, you know?” You say, finally telling him about the night. 

He nods.

“But then, he took me to Lovers Lake and then he kissed me, a-and then he tried to do more and I didn’t–” you pause, taking a deep breath when you feel the disgust and the anger and the fear rushing through again, “I didn’t want it, I pushed him away but he was so persistent a-and I was so scared, Eddie.” 

He stares at you, helplessly and angry at the man who did this to you. He has already done what he wanted to do, but he wants to do it again. He wants to hurt him, over and over again. 

He can’t stand the thought of you being so scared, of you feeling so helpless and afraid and small. 

“I slapped him and I tried to run but then he came after me, and then he said all these things to me. He told me that he never wanted to get to know me, t-that he just wanted to fuck me,” you say in disgust.

You clench your fists, not noticing how deep your nails dig into your palms, “cause apparently that’s all I’m good for, I’m a good fuck. I’m boring and not interesting enough to keep around, that’s why Steve dumped me. I am nothing but a good fuck, that’s all I am to others.” 

Eddie stares at you in shock. 

His soul is filled with anger and he wants nothing more than to go after him, again and again. 

He takes no offense to your question, he knows the state you were in after Steve left you, the insecurities and the thoughts you were dealing with. 

“It made me feel so, so worthless.”

Eddie’s heart aches at your words. 

You sit there, making yourself as small as possible, you wrap your arms tighter around your legs as you pull them closer to your chest, you wipe away the tears of anger and hurt and you look down with a trembling lip.

“Sweetheart, I hope you know that he was full of shit.” 

You hear the shakiness in his voice, you see the anger in his features when you look up at him, the mention of Ray is enough to fill Eddie with rage, you wonder what he looked and felt like when Ray was right in front of him. 

“Guys like him are used to things going their way, when they don’t, they get angry and frustrated, you bruise their ego, they’ll bruise you back in some way,” he mumbles the last part as he thinks of the bruises he had left on you, “and this guy, he’s a fucking psychopath, I can tell you that much.”

He won’t tell you everything, he won’t tell you what Ray said to him, you know he won’t. 

“Somehow, he knows how to fucking get to you,” he says, pausing to take a deep breath.

What does he mean by that?

“I-I mean, he knew how to get to you, he said things to you that he knew would hurt – but, it’s all bullshit, y/n, it’s all fucking bullshit. You are not boring in any way, shit, you’re the coolest person I know! You’ve always been the coolest person, sweetheart – even when you were still just listening to The Smiths and rewatching the same two movies every Friday, you were still the coolest fucking person on this planet!”

Your eyes widen, a smile tugs at your lips at his little outburst. 

“The whole planet?” You ask, giggling. 

“Yeah,” he smiles when he hears your giggle, “the whole planet, sweetheart.”

“There’s so many amazing girls you haven’t met yet though,” you point out, tilting your head. 

“There’s no one more amazing than you.” 

You smile but you don’t believe his words. 

Eddie eyes your whole face as his crosses with confusion, sadness and disbelief. 

You easily believed the words Ray said about you, but you struggle to believe his words. He thought you were doing better, he hoped so. 

“I shouldn’t have just gone after him, I should’ve gone after Harrington’s hair as well.”

To hear him admit that he went after Ray doesn’t shock you, you knew it from the moment you saw Ray at the hospital.

You shake your head with a chuckle. 

“I’m serious,” he says, nudging your knee with his hand, “he was an asshole to you. He didn’t deserve you.”

“Eddie,” you whisper. 

“It’s the truth, y/n. Steve never deserved you, he treated you like shit, he made you feel like shit.” 

Eddie knew it from the start, from the moment you first talked, from the moment you first spent time together, he could see the pain in your eyes, the insecurities that you have felt just because of him. Steve had the best thing he could get; your love. But he threw it all away, he never gave you what you deserved, he never treated you like he should have, he never loved you like you should have been loved. He gave it all to her, all the kindness, all the gentleness, all the trust and the love, she got it all without having to fight for it, without having to ask for it, he just gave it to her, he gave her the things that you deserved. 

Eddie would never admit it, but to see Steve treat his new girlfriend like the queen of the world, always made him so incredibly angry, that’s how he should have treated you when you were still with him but instead, he treated you like garbage, he betrayed you, he lied to you, he hurt you over and over again, he put other girls before you, he gave you nothing but pain and still, you stayed with him but he tossed you aside so easily and replaced you with another girl. 

“You believed Ray’s words, right?” 

You blink, looking down at your hands as you slowly nod. 

“Because of Steve,” he mumbles quietly, “he made you feel that way first, right?” 

Your heart drops a little, tears well up in your eyes again. 

Steve made you feel like you were never good enough, like you weren’t interesting enough, like you weren’t the right girl to be a girlfriend, like you didn’t deserve to be treated like a girl someone loves, like you were nothing more than a side piece because that is how he treated you most of the time. 

That is why his words had gotten to you. That is why you got drunk and high at a place you shouldn’t be at. 

“Yeah,” you whisper, sadly. 

Eddie looks at you with sad eyes. 

He doesn’t hate Steve, not anymore. He can tell that he changed, he knows that he regrets his actions and the way he treated you but he can’t help but feel anger towards him at this moment. 

You keep looking down, trying to hide the sadness on your face and tears in your eyes. Eddie reaches his hands out to you, slowly. He cups your cheeks and tilts your head up,  eyeing the look on your face as he wills himself to speak. 

“Listen to me, sweetheart. If I were him, I would’ve held onto you, I would’ve taken you on all the dates, I would’ve dropped all my shitty friends, I would’ve kicked Billy’s ass a long time ago, I would’ve never looked at any other girl if you were by my side, I would’ve treated you like the queen that you are,” he says, tapping your nose to make you smile and it works, it always does. 

Your eyes soften and you melt into his touch, smiling sadly at his words. 

You wish he would’ve done all of these things but, he never did. 

“I would have never let a bad thought get into this pretty head,” he says, tapping your forehead softly.

“And I certainly would have never let you go, ever.” 

Your brows knit, your eyes are glossy, again. You look into his soft brown eyes and you see nothing but the truth, he isn’t just saying that to make you feel better, to take away your pain. He is honest, he always is. 

Eddie watches you, he watches the way your eyes skip over his whole face, the way they flash with sadness and with fear as you think about his words and then you say something that shocks him, a little. 

“Please don’t.” 

His brows rise up, surprise crosses his features. 

“Please don’t ever let me go,” you whisper, your lip trembling when you reach your hand out to grab his wrist, “please don’t leave me.”

The smile falls from his face, his eyes widen with sadness. This time, he doesn’t hesitate to pull you into his arms, he hugs you tightly, burying his face in the crook of your neck.

“I would never leave you, sweetheart. You will always have me.”

“Promise?” You ask shakily, just as you asked him once. 

You need him to stay. You can’t lose him, not after you had lost Steve already. 

“I promise,” he whispers, squeezing your sides as you hug him back tighter. 

You close your eyes and lay your chin on his shoulder as you melt into his embrace. He radiates warmth and comfort, safety and something you can’t understand yet. Eddie smells like cigarettes but you don’t mind, the smell of his cologne and his body wash covers up the smell of smoke. 

Eddie runs his fingers through your hair, finally holding you the way he has been craving to ever since that night. 

“I’ll marry you one day.”  

“What?” You ask, giggling. 

“I said; I’ll marry you one day,” he chuckles, not pulling away from the hug just yet. 

“Is that a proposal?” You joke, unable to fight the smile off of your face.

“Mhmm.”

“Where’s the ring?”

“I’ll give you one of mine.”

“I want the one with the black stone.”

“You got it, angel.”

You giggle again and he smiles at that. 

When you pull away and he sees that the tears are long gone, and a smile is playing on your lips, he pinches your cheek gently. 

“There’s the smile I wanted to see,” he grins. 

Your hair falls in front of your face when you look down at his hands. There are cuts and bruises on his knuckles, you are scared to touch them but you take one of his hands in yours and you softly touch the bruises with your fingers. 

You don’t need to talk about it, it’s enough to look at each other to understand it all. 

He watches you, again and he wonders what you are thinking. 

He clears his throat about to speak up but you beat him to it. 

“You know, I like your idea,” you say as you look at him through your lashes. 

“Oh yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“Well,” he starts, already smiling at you, “we should get married when we’re both 30 and still single.”

You laugh, “that sounds like a plan.”

“A good plan?” 

“The best. But, you don’t plan on spending your twenties without me, do you?” 

He scoffs, “never, what would I do without my best friend?”

Your heart skips a beat and for the first time after the horrible days you have had, you feel the happiness rushing back. You feel comforted and safe, you know that as long as you have him, your best friend, nothing bad will happen to you. The look in his eyes, the bruises on his knuckles are the evidence that he will do everything to keep you safe. 

This time, you are the one reaching out to touch him, you cup his cheeks and you surprise him when you pull him towards you to kiss him, to kiss his cheek. 

“You’re the best, Eddie,” you whisper before your lips meet his cheek again, “you’re my favorite person.”

You don’t pay attention to the way his cheeks flush red, you don’t see the way his eyes flash with something you haven’t seen before.

Eddie stares at you for the longest time and he suddenly feels flustered when he realizes that you can see the redness on his cheeks and his neck when he catches a glimpse of himself in the mirror on the wall and then, he remembers what Steve said to him last night.

It all comes rushing in and it overwhelms him.

He squeezes your hand, clearing his throat, “I-I’m gonna get us something to drink,” he says as he practically rushes out of his room, leaving the door open as he makes his way into the kitchen. He raises his hand, running his fingers through his hair as he lets out a long sigh. Turning on the lights, he places his hands on the counter, gripping it tightly. 

If only Harrington would have kept his fucking mouth shut.

Eddie was driving Steve back to his house, knuckles almost bleeding on the steering wheel, not a single word being said by neither of the men. Steve's temple was bruised, his fists as well and Eddie if he were to raise his shirt up, a bruise would be displayed on his rib.

The Harrington's house came into view and Eddie parked the car in front of it, waiting for Steve to come out. He heard the door open but it didn't close, making him turn to find Steve looking forward, eyes that Eddie could only describe as lost, yet with fire within them, as if angry.

“Munson.” It was the first time Steve has said a word to him.

“Yes Harrington?” And he was expecting a congratulations or a thank you or good job because of what they just did together to someone that hurt you. But Steve's gaze turned to him, a cold glare featuring in his eyes, and Eddie's face went rigid.

“You're a fucking liar.”

And then the door slams, and Steve Harrington goes back to his house, leaving Eddie Munson completely stunned inside of his van. 

Shit.

The sound of the freezer door closing startles him a little. He turns around with a frown, he finds you walking towards him with a bag of frozen peas in your hand, without a single word, you grab his right hand, placing the cold bag on his bruised knuckles. 

He looks down at you, swallowing nervously. 

“You didn’t have to do this,” you whisper, finally addressing it. You look up with glossy eyes, a knowing look lingers in them, you did not know how to approach this topic but, you don’t really have to. You know why he did it.

“Sweetheart–”

“Thank you,” you whisper as a happy tear runs down your cheek because for the first time, you feel protected and loved after all these years of believing that you do not deserve this. Eddie proved you wrong, time and time, he proved you wrong and showed you that you do deserve this and more.

Eddie gazes down at you like you are the most precious thing in the world. 

He wipes your tear away the way he always does before he pulls you into his arms. He holds you, he holds you tightly, like he never wants to let you go, like no one ever has before.

Eddie enjoys this moment, just standing here in the kitchen under dim lights with you in his arms before he has to ruin the moment. 

“You should thank Steve too.”

He feels the way you freeze in his arms and he also feels how you don’t pull away. 

“Steve was there too?”

“He was.”

You don’t say anything, you stay quiet and then you whisper a small ‘oh’ before you relax again and hug him tighter, pressing your cheek against his chest as you listen to his beating heart. 

Eddie tightens his hold on you as well, he kisses the top of your head. 

“Anybody that hurts you won’t walk away without a bruise.” He whispers.

Something changed and you can both feel it, you don’t understand it, not yet.

-

You should not be here. 

You know that you should be far away from this place. 

It was bad enough that you had called him three nights ago, that you had let yourself be vulnerable in front of him, that you had spent the morning with him, that you had let him drive you home, that you had hugged him. It was bad but it was nice, it was nice to be with him again. 

To drive in his car, to feel his arms around you again, to see him look at you. 

You never realized how much you missed it, how much you missed him. 

Your thoughts kept taking you back to him, especially today. The record store was mostly empty today and you stood behind the counter, listening to the music playing on the radio and drawing in the notebook that Eddie gave you. 

When Heroes by David Bowie started playing, you felt like you were being haunted, haunted by memories of you and him together.

You shouldn’t let your heart guide you here but it did, you let it, just like you always do. 

You wanted to see him, to thank him for what he did but you didn’t want to see this. 

You should be used to it by now, after months of seeing him with her, it should be easier, right? It’s not. 

And as you stand there, watching him kiss her on his porch, smiling against her and brushing the curls out of her face, you can’t help but feel that it will never be easier. 

He looks happy, happier than he ever did when he was with you and even though you let him go a long time ago, you still feel the ache in your heart, the hollowness in your stomach. 

He used to kiss you like this, though he never looked at you the way he looks at her – with the light in his eyes and the smile on his face, the one that doesn’t look forced or fake. 

You hear her giggle when he drops the keys to his house. He picks them up and pulls her back towards him, leaning down to kiss her cheek before he opens the door to let her in. 

You never watched him so closely when he was with her, you always avoided it, not wanting to hurt yourself more than necessary but now, you can see it all, the love and the happiness in his features. 

He loves her. 

You always knew that he did, yet, somehow it feels like you understood it all just now. 

He loves her. 

He claimed to have loved you too and maybe he did, maybe he did love you but never like this. 

A weird feeling settles in Steve’s heart and he doesn’t know what it is that pushes him to turn around but he does, he looks back as though expecting to see someone standing in his driveway but it’s empty.  

He doesn’t see anything but trees and the empty streets. 

He furrows his brows, almost confused to not see anyone. 

“Steve?” Nancy calls from inside the house, “come on.”

“Yeah,” he mumbles to himself before he turns around and walks inside. He holds the door, not shutting it yet, he takes one final look at his driveway, staring at it for a long minute before he closes the door. 

next chapter

-

tagging friends & mutuals

@mysticmunson @taintedcigs @corrodedseraphine @corrodedcorpses @wroteclassicaly @take-everything-you-can @trashmouth-richie @xxhellfiregirlxx @screammunson @nemesis729 @somethingvicked @sherrylyn628

[bethanydelleman]

Why you should read Northanger Abbey

Northanger Abbey frequently scores second on polls of least liked Austen novel, but I honestly don’t know why because it's awesome. So let me try to convince you to read it...

Northanger Abbey: Everything you could wish for in a novel!

The Most Attractive Leading Man in Austen: I know you think you want Darcy, but do you really want a man who can’t take a joke? How about instead of insulting you at the assembly, he dances with you and makes you laugh! Surveys reveal that “makes me laugh” is a consistently attractive trait in a future spouse. Besides being extraordinarily funny, he also will willingly take you dress shopping, loves his sister, and reads novels. Shall we agree that he is the perfect man?

Most Relatable Leading Lady: Despite having a good education, are you sometimes a little lost in a conversation? Are you reasonably good looking, passably intelligent, and only somewhat accomplished? Catherine Morland is just a normal, everyday girl who stands up against peer pressure and falls head-over-heels in love with a cute guy. If she could be born to be a heroine, than all of us can be!

Villains So Well Drawn You Will Swear you Met Them Yesterday: Have you met a guy who constantly brags about his vehicle, talks without actually saying anything, and who assumes that girls will go for him even though he has nothing to recommend him? I have, and so has Jane Austen, its John Thorpe! Isabella is a classic drama queen who is dating a really sweet nerd but angling for the football star. You knew her in high school, I guarantee it.

Highly quotable one liners:

“I cannot speak well enough to be unintelligible.”

“The person, be it gentleman or lady, who has not pleasure in a good novel, must be intolerably stupid.”

“His departure gave Catherine the first experimental conviction that a loss may be sometimes a gain.”

Great life lessons: 

“No man is offended by another man’s admiration of the woman he loves; it is the woman only who can make it a torment.”

“Beware how you give your heart.”

“Our pleasures in this world are always to be paid for.”

and best of all, a passionate defence of reading novels from the Narrator, who continues to be sarcastic and hilarious throughout the novel.

Northanger Abbey, honestly, what’s not to love?

[insufferableprotagonistpoll]

Round 3

Propaganda why Feyre Archeron is insufferable:

"She is Miss Perfect Special Never Does Anything Wrong. Rhys with her is like Gordon Ramsay with children, EXCEPT SHE'S A GROWN ADULT. I didn't hate her tooooo much in books 1-3 (she was barely tolerable), but in the novella, she becomes this housewife First Lady type character who is fine doing paperwork after stating previously that she wants to be doing something more "important", and living in a McMansion. THEN THE FIFTH BOOK STARTS WITH HER HAVING AN "INTERVENTION" FOR HER SISTER, WHICH IS BASICALLY FEYRE TELLING NESTA THAT SHE'S GRIEVING INCORRECTLY. Bitch, who are YOU to tell someone that THEIR grief is making YOUR life uncomfortable?? "Wah wah the social implications" you're the literal queen, no one cares that your sister is embarrassing you.

Imo, Feyre is also the result of a lot of internalized misogyny on the part of the author, bc she has two men in love with her and gets along very well with every other male character that's not "evil", but many of the female characters are antagonistic or unhelpful towards Feyre, seemingly apropos of nothing. It's giving "I'm not like OTHER girls". She also very clearly doesn't want children but then miraculously changes her mind bc apparently female characters can't be fulfilled without children. 🙄

Oh and btw Feyre also manages to get the powers of EVERY fairy court ruler at the end of the first book. I DO NOT use the term "mary sue" lightly, as that label has been used against feminist characters a lot, but Feyre exemplifies the Mary Sue trope."

"SHES SO ANNOYING AND SO SO STUPID AND BY THE END SHE JUST BECOMES A COMPLETE DOORMAT AND LETS RHYS WALK ALL OVER HER tbh im more mad at the author for butchering her but she's still annoying as all hell"

"Thinks she’s the victim of everything. Destroys an entire Court. Forces an intervention on her sister who is grieving differently than Feyre is."

"She's the WORST. She's an asshole to her family but thinks she deserves to be worshipped by them because she hunts or whatever, feels entitled all the time, is ableist to her dad, is fantasy racist and turns from being racist to not being racist in a BLINK, is ridiculously overpowered and treated as oh-so-special by every single other character ... I hate her and I wish she would die. "

Propaganda why Marinette Dupain-Cheng is insufferable:

"shes annoyinng anf shes a stalker"

"I love fanon miraculous but by god she has got to stop obsessively stalking her crush and generally making a ton of other terrible decisions. I’d submit Adrien too but he’s more of a deuteragonist"

"I started the show, watched one episode, and never tried again. I simply do not vibe with her."

"I get she has social anxiety but the way she goes about stalking Adrien is kind of the worst like she even has creep shots of him hanging in her room? That’s weird. I think Adrien’s going through enough without having to deal with the main character being his stalker lol. I know they’re (spoilers) at this point but in the beginning it was so sus"

"In the newest season, Marinette hides the fact that Hawkmoth was Adrien’s dad. This leads to the bastard getting a statue and honored as a hero after his death. Adrien now never gets to know the fact that his abusive and neglectful father was the one trying to kill him and is instead proud of him."

"Her crush on Adrien is like a black hole for her character. Things she’s done because of it:

1) stolen property

2) ruined dates

3) humiliated other characters

4) has a chart of Adrien’s daily schedule for the next year in her room (this is stalking)

5) broke into his room and sniffed his pillow (also a crime)

6) sniffed, took the hair from, and tried to kiss what she thought was a wax statue of Adrien

7) convinced her parents to let her go to China. Why? Not because she wants to connect with her mother’s heritage, not even because she’s a budding fashion designer and Shanghai is considered a fashion hotspot. It’s because Adrien was there."

"She easily gets away with bad, stalkerish behavior, it always feels like she can ‘do no wrong’ unless the show wants us to pity her, and the show writers want us to think she is a quirky and socially awkward girl when throughout the series we see her be friends with basically everyone in Paris with many connections to high up places."

"Listen, if Adrien's here, she needs to be too. I like her, but from the odd stalker-ish behaviour, to straight up lying to adrien and telling him that his abusive father was actually a 'very good person, a hero even and not the main villain of the series I promise', there's no way she doesn't deserve to be in the polls."

[salty-lemon-shark-from-the-sea]

Maya and the Three + (Reader) Incorrect quotes (Part 2)

Chimi: Ugh, crushes are so dumb.

Rico: I know. Whenever I’m near the person I like I just start acting stupid.

Chimi: But you’re always acting stupid?

Rico: …

Rico: Yeah, don’t think about that too hard.

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

Chivo: Pick a card, any card.

Bone: Fine.

Chivo: Wait, that’s my credit card!

Skull: You said any card.

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

Xtabay: I scare people a lot because I walk very softly and they don’t hear me enter rooms. So when they turn around, I’m just kind of there and their fear fuels me.

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

Chimi: Everyone knows that Santa is an international designed by the big five corporations to sell tinsel and video games to an unsuspecting public.

(Reader): The whole “childhood wonder” stage just blew right past you, didn’t it?

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

Rico: Why is Picchu crying?

Chimi: They saw a leaf on the sidewalk and-

Picchu: IT LOOKED SO CRUNCHY!

Rico: Please don’t say what I think you’re gonna say-

Picchu: AND WHEN I STEPPED ON IT THERE WAS NO CRUNCH!

Rico: NO, NOT THAT!

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

Camazotz: Wow you and Cabrakan are home early from the movies. What happened?

Cipactli: We got kicked out because Cabrakan wouldn’t stop yelling diving scores as people jumped off the titanic.

Cabrakan: That last guy had a solid 8, I’m telling you!

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

Maya: I regret nothing!!!

Zatz: I regret everything!!!

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

Zatz: Name a more iconic duo than my crippling fear of abandonment and my anxiety. I’ll wait.

(Reader): You and me!

Zatz: *tearing up* Ok.

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

Queen Teca: So, what’s for dinner?

King Teca, staring at the food they burnt: Regret.

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

Vucub: Being half asleep and feeling someone gently plant a kiss on your forehead is one of the purest kinds of love in the world.

Chivo: Unless you’re home alone.

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

Chimi: This date is boring!

(Reader) This isn’t a date. I said I was going to the store.

Chimi: Then why did you invite me?

(Reader): I didn’t, I specifically said “don’t come with me,” then you said, “fuck you (Reader) I’ll do whatever I want!”

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

Rico: *very seriously* You need to stop doing weird things to cope with the stress. Going outside might help.

Chimi: I went to the park today.

Rico: There you go! I hope you got something from that.

Chimi: *opening their coat* This duck.

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

Acat: Zatz is playing hard to get.

Acat: Little do they know, I’m a master at playing hard to get rid of.

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

Lord Mictlan: What are you doing tomorrow?

Any god/goddess: Having my day ruined by whatever you’re about to ask me to do.

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

Lady Micte: If I ever had a child, I image they would be a lot like you.

Lord Mictlan: Aww, thanks—

Lady Micte: Which is probably why I’ve never reproduced.

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

(Reader): Did you get the eggs like I asked?

Maya: Even better!

(Reader): What the fuck did you—

Maya: *holding up a chicken* Her name is Fluffy.

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

Lord Mictlan: What have I done wrong?!

(Reader): Everything. For your entire life.

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

(Reader): Chivo… Why did you draw a pentagram on the floor?

Chivo: Your text told me to satanize the house before you returned.

(Reader):

(Reader): I wrote sanitize Chivo.

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

Rico: (Reader) that's disgusting. You’re only giving free stuff to beautiful people.

Chimi: Yeah, you should be ashamed of yourself.

(Reader): Oh yeah? *gets really close to Chimi* How about a muffin on the house baby?

Chimi, giggling: I’m pretty.

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

Acat: Please! Pretend I’m useful!

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

Camazotz: Oh Zatz, we have a visitor!

Zatz: Don’t tell me it’s (Reader).

Camazotz: It’s (Reader).

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

Zatz: There’s no way they like me back.

(Reader): Maya would throw herself in front of a moving car for you.

Zatz: Maya would throw herself in front of a moving car for fun.

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

(Reader): I have so much energy, I want to run a marathon or commit a crime… which should I do?

Barbarian Princess: Please don’t get arrested.

(Reader): No promises! <3

Barbarian King: Why not both? Get creative!

(Reader): Wonderful suggestion, thank you.

Barbarian Princess: Please don’t encourage them, Papa.

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

Lord Mictlan: Love is weakness and an evolutionary mistake.

Camazotz: You are literally making a Valentine’s Day card for Lady Micte.

Lord Mictlan, pointing their hot glue gun towards Camazotz: You’re on thin fucking ice.

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

King Teca: Don’t mansplain this to me!

Queen Teca: Wh- I’m a woman! I can’t mansplain anything to you!

King Teca: … Well, I’m a feminist, and I believe a woman can do anything a man does!

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

Skull, at (Reader): Would you like to stay for dinner?

Bone, from the kitchen: Would you like to stay forever!?!

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

*Acat is telling a story*

Hura: Wow, Acat, this story has everything! Action! Adventure! Romance!

Can: *grunting* Romance?

Hura: I have a crush on them.

●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●◦●

Xtabay: How do I make a date really romantic?

Vucub: Be mysterious.

Xtabay: Okay.

*Later, while on a date with (Reader)

(Reader): So where are we going?

Xtabay: None of your fucking business.

[bluerosefox]

[2023 Prompt List 1][Previous] [2023 Prompt List 2][Here] [2023 Prompt List 3][Next]

|The MANY Bloodlines of Constantine (Its by pure dumb luck Danny is crowned Ghost King before his 18th, because he learns his biodad had sold his soul, its void now, and not just his but also his half-siblings as well... Constantine is getting decked.)  (Psst read the reblogs, everyone had fun adding to this one) |Daughter of Phantom, Lady Gotham. (Lady Gotham, is Danny Phantom’s daughter) |No Longer In Service (Ghost King Danny has an idea how to get summoners to stop summoning him) |Overdue Payments (Ghost King Danny finds Ra’s al ghul’s overdue payments and a request to repossess it) |For Them (Danny uses his ice to save Dani (Ellie) from melting and does so in front of one Dr. Victor Fries, aka Mr. Freeze) |In A Single Night (Vlad is taken down by either Selina or Tim in a single night due to being a creepy creep) |Assassin Heir? Crime Fighting Furry? NOPE NO THANK YOU! (Danny wakes up in a DC version of himself and tries to nope out of the Assassin lifestyle and avoid becoming a crime fighter. Now if only the others understood that) |Playing Dead AU (Danny is the dead body for those Murder Mystery parties and gets a gig for the Gotham elite. I strongly suggest reading the reblogs, they get amazing for this) |Of Godsons, Fruitloops, and Lois ‘I will drag all secrets out into the sun’ Lane (Lois Lane is Danny’s only godparent, Vlad better watch out) |Recluse Owner, Bookshelf Gremlin, and the Cute Cafe Guy (Danny and Dani have to leave their home dimension behind and decide to open a cafe with Ghostwriter whose been wanting a way to get new books without having to go out and deal with people. Jason is sus of the new bookstore that opened up overnight) (Very hinted Dead on Main) |Cujo is.... Trying (Danny gets hurt, Cujo and him are yeeted into the Gotham, and Cujo... Cujo is trying to do his best even as he’s chased after a sword wielding bird boy)  |Tim, buddy, what do you mean you might had accidentally made a Love Child?! (Danny learns is the love child clone? of Tim and Kon that Tim accidentally made during his bad year of losing everything and Danny gets deaged and tossed back into his home dimension. It was due to Clockwork that he never noticed the life he created (cause villain Tim timeline was nearly on set) but finds out what he created when said love child shows up at a Gala wandering around just after he announced he’s dating Kon) (a TimxKon story where they try to raise their clone love child) |Bellatrix Star ( a TaliaxDanny idea. Queen Talia and Ghost King Danny) |Joker Messed Around and Found Freaking Out. (Joker messed with the wrong person when he took a visiting class hostage) |Fenton Ethics and Test Tube Babies (Jazz and Danny aren’t Fenton’s but are half-siblings and cousins (basically same mom, different dad’s)...The Fenton’s have some... questionable ethics and moral) |Timelines, Red Robins, and Kings (dont ask about the title, it was only thing I can think of) (Tim crashes in on Danny’s ghost King lesson’s during his Red Robin run. Clockwork is excited for this timeline cause he gets to have some fun) |Beloved Beyond Time (Due to weird time-traveling, Ghost Prince Danny is summoned and mistaken as King by the LoA. There he meets a smitten young Damian al Ghul who proclaims they will marry... Later Danny finds himself cornered by a year older Damian when he returns to his own time) |Over Tea (Gotham gets a sudden and strange weather that shakes it to its core. The Batfam is trying to find the source, meanwhile a young Ghost King and Lady Gotham are discussing things over tea. |Good Doggos Give Hope! (A self-indulgant idea of Cujo wanting to help his fav ghost boy and meeting a very special ring wearing Corgi) |Taking a Chance (Good!Mom Talia! DannyxTalia (Royal Errors) and half-siblings Damian and Ellie (Danielle). Talia discovers Ra’s future he set out for Damian and is at the ends of her ropes, she is given a chance to leave in the form of a cryptic time being. Meanwhile Danny needs someone to become Danielle’s mother before she completely destabilizes)

[slashingdisneypasta]

Evil Queen x Fem!AFAB!Reader ll Drabble

Plot: Your gentleman caller thinks you're being attacked by a goblin 🧝‍♂️ before his eyes. He doesn't know about you and your queen's escapades... not even the rumours.

*Inspired by Grumpy suggesting that she can turn herself invisible.

Warnings: This is VULGAR, guys. 'Ghost' sex, eating out, public sex, exhibitionism!!!, dubcon on your end (this is a whole surprise from her) and non con for your poor date. Horny lesbians this is for you.

You're out in the grounds on a walk with a possible suitor (one who obviously doesn't know about your dealings with the Queen. Not even the rumours. A foreign nobel), having stopped under a particularly pretty tree to talk - at a respectable distance from one another, -, when you feel it.

Soft lips on your neck. You're startled, eyes widening for a moment. What in the worl-

The lips, belonging to someone apparently invisible standing between you and the nobel talking on about grain to you, press another cool, lingering kiss on your neck before trailing more of them all the way up your neck- leaving heat all over your skin in their wake. Then theirs a hot breath on your ear and you're truy wondering whether possiblh a malevolent castle ghost, or a goblin or something equally devious and scary has taken interest in you- when Hilda's voice whispers ever so softly in your ear. So soft you almost mistake it for the wind.

"Don't react just yet, pet. Let him think everything is fine... "

The words make you nervous but excitement licks at your insides, too, like a flame; A very bad flame that you should put out. You should, you should, you will...

You can't. You've always been weak when it came to the wills of Grimhilde, your Queen. She could make you do anything far too easily, like some sort of siren. You let her teach you things, familiarise you with things... no Lady should know about.

Like how to kiss, and how to use ones lips and tongue on another lady under her skirts when its just the two of you, and the feeling of two wet 'pussies' gliding against eachother... not to mention that vulgar word... You can't help eagerly anticipating whatever she has in store for you right now. Even if it is a wholly innapropriate moment, and you feel terrified that this man will notice, or see something, and call you horrible names. Ruin your reputation. Ruin you.

As if the Queen hasn't already done that.

Except for your reputation, which is still intact by a loose string in this palace- if only because she handles the rumours. 'Gets rid of them'. How? You're not sure. And you're afraid to ask.

While Hilda continues to leave tantelising ghost kisses all over you, your jaw line and the little sensitive spot where your jaw ends just under your earlobe (There she sees it fit to glide her tongue gently, making you shiver when the breeze blows against the area), you try your best to listen to your date. He's talking about- what was he talking about again?? Oh god oh god!-

"Anyway- my apologies, I must be boring you. No one wants to talk about grain for an entire walk." Grain! Yes, it was grain! That was the topic! As Hilda moves over your chin and to the other side of your face and places a hand on your waist and you wonder shortly if her invisibility spell works on her clothes (or if she's naked right now), the nobel gives a lovely smile and nods. "What are you interested in? Do you read?"

Oh, he's kind. You feel bad for what's happening right now- but Hilda doesn't. Her hand starts to rub slowly up and down your side as she lathers you with kisses. "I do! U-um, recently I've been reading some old fables... a l-little childish, I realise, but they're in Portugese so I'm using them to, ah, learn."

"I think that's very admirable. What made you inclined to learn a foreign language?"

"I wish to travel. And, I figure, if I'm going to be there I should know how to communicate there." Hilda allows you to reply, before leaving a particularly sweet kiss to the corner of your lips. More then the corner. Almost half your mouth. You can't kiss back, though, even if you want to- that would surely be an odd sight.

"Very good." Your nobel date laughs, before going into another tangent- this time about Portugal. He's been there, apparently, and if you were listening you would be revited- but Hilda's kisses are straying down onto your throat. She sucks a little on her way down there before she gets to the neck of your dress, and you feel her smirk against your skin. If you didn't feel unbearably hot before, from the affections and the embarrassment, your skin would definitely boil now from the fluster. She's definitely doing this at least partly to torture you.

It's one of her favourite games.

When she starts kissing down your body, over the swell of your chest and down your corset area, your heart truly starts to beat hard in your chest. Like the wings of a bird fighting to stay in the air.

What is she doing!??

Your skirt is long, brushing against the beautiful green grass of the Queen's gardens (matching the gorgeous, magnificent trees you're under), so she can't possibly go any further!! The man with you would definitely notice!

Absolutely not. She wouldn't. That's too-

You feel breeze on your ankles that wasn't there before and the presence of a hand slpping up between your legs. Fingers rubbing one of your thighs.

The nobelman notices the slight lifting of your skirt, despite the lack of wind and the fact that your hands are far from your skirts, and raises a curious brow. "- I'm sorry, my lady, but there seems to be uh- some malfunction occuring with your dress... "

"Oh, um, I'm not sure- " How to lie about this.

The feeling of Hildas hand rubbing your thigh, along with all the kisses before (and, you'd hate to ever be made to admit it- but the danger of the situation as well) are making you feel familiar tingles in your lower area. A greasy slick is beginning to drench your thighs, and you can't take it!! A dark part of you wants her to continue whatever she's doing.

Make you come, right there.

In front of this man. Out in the open. You know it would be the biggest orgasm you'd ever experienced so far, the most pleasure she had shown you so far, even though you know you would be

Mortified.

And the damage to your reputation, by way of this nobleman, would be irreparable.

- Yet, you feel it in your soul, and between your thighs, that you want it.

... that doesn't mean you have to be slave to those feelings, though. You can stop this, you know it. You should.

Hilda can't possibly make you go through with this, can she?

Even though her fingers are now starting to stroke your dripping wet folds, your skirts raising up higher as they probably glide up her shoulder. You just know that she must look devious. Evil, as they call her in the villages.

... you're about to speak up again, suggest you both (you and your date) go back to the castle- but then something happens that makes your stomach completely flip. The nobleman's eyes blow open wide and he looks horrified.

"G- goblin! A goblin has you!!"

The nobleman grabs for his sword after Hilda pushes your skirts all the way up to reveal you to the outside world, but he's quickly shot with a spark of some kind of magic; sparks of fire erupting from the handle of his blade and causing him to drop it instead kf valiantly 'rescue' you. He goes to grab it again, hurried and clumsy, but another shot of magic makes him still.

"H- " You try to say Hilda, and the nobleman (fully conscious with his wide eyes stuck on you- or more specifically your glistening folds) probably thinks you were going to say help. But it doesn't matter either way, as that is the moment Hilda starts to play with your clit. A choked moan forces its way up through your throat, the sensation of her soft, dexterous fingers rubbing prompt circles in the middle of your folds- spreading your wetness all over your lips. Oh god!- oh fuck!

Your thighs beg to part more widely, give your Queen more room to rub you and finger you, make you cum, but you refuse them. No, no. This can't be happening. Fine, you will allow the man watching to think you're being attacked by an evil forest creature- but you won't spread yourself out before him and give yourself over. Even if it feels magical. No. You can't. You have to at least look like you're in distress! You must!

Hilda starts rubbing her finger in a line through your lips, stroking skilfully against your clit as if it were her own she were pleasuring. It's not, though. It's not her. Its you. She's using yours.

Before you can even think anymore, you feel her juicy wet tongue slide against your pussy, a hot flat stroke all over. A sigh slips out of you, your hips twitching.

Oh fuck- your eyes snap up to the noblemans as Hilda continues to lick you, taste you, take away your fucking sanity.

He's still watching, he saw your face change from horror to pleasure. His brows are furrowed in horror, concern and... confusion. Are you liking this!?? Being taken by a damn fae creature!?

You're so close to just giving in now, because how much worse can it really get with this guy, when Hilda's tongue dips between your delicious folds and her lips touch your delicate private skin. Her tongue is just as adept as her fingers, scooping into you and playing with your clit like a filthy whore would in a brothel (you would never tell her such a thing, but she's aware), and you completely give in.

Your feet step apart in order to make more room for your majesty between your wet thighs so she can kiss and fondle your hole even more with her tongue. She smirks once again into your skin and you hear a devious giggle; her fingers coming up between your thighs again and holding open your folds for her to abhse your hole more directly with her dirty, hungry tongue.

For the gentleman to see better, of course. You know thats what she meant, that's what she would say. At this point you're completely hers. She could make you do anything with her tongue deep in your hole like this, your pussy absolutely loving the feel of her fucking you with it in the open air, clear for this man to watch and see. You notice he has a bulge in his nice pants as well a damp spot, and you look away; closing your eyes.

He deserves a bit of respect. What you can give him, at least. Even if that's just pretending to not notice his arousal at your situation.

Before too long a finger slips into your hole instead of her tongue, digging in deep and stretching your walls so much better then her tongue could. You start moaning more frequently, rocking your hips onto her hand. She adds another finger, ripping you open so good, and then one more, and all 3 begin to thrust firmly in and out of your tiny squishy hole. Your moaning is unabashed now and you know the nobleman is seeing you stretched open in front of him but you can't bring yourself to care at all anymore. In fact- it might be making it feel better, that you're being watched- and wanted.

Your hips roll in the air and one of your hands dissapears into your hair; tugging at the strands and begging Hilda. Pleasepleaseplease. Makememakememakeme. Ijusywannacomeijustwannacome!

When her tongue comes back to you as well as her fingers, licking at your hard clit, you open your eyes a crack and see the man once more before you're sure Hilda will 'get rid of him' like she does all the rumours about you. He looks a terrible mess, caught between horror and lust, and it sends you over the edge.

One more hard thrust from Hilda, her curling her fingers inside you to rub viciously at your tight meaty walls squeezing her, hitting your sweet spot so beyond perfectly, and you come harsher than you ever have before.

[songwings]

Deaf AU, or: Why Miriam Is Deaf and How This Changes Very Little

(Shard) Ok so! We've only posted art of this AU thus far but i feel compelled to ramble about it, so here we go. Also disclaimer that while this could be any sign language, we're more familiar with American Sign Language and the deaf culture in the United States, so that's what I'll say for this post.

The basic premise is that Miriam is deaf (born that way) - and not much else changes, besides a few things:

The mode of communication between her and Kiwi, and later Audrey (sign language.)

Kiwi already knows some ASL, there be deaf and hard of hearing residents in Langtree!

Audrey loses her hearing and becomes deaf over the course of the game's story, thanks to her very loud sword.

This AU manifested as a result of us seeing Miriam's loneliness and the isolation that seems to be inherent to being a Scary Witch - that's the same for deafness! You might not believe it, but many people see deafness as something horrifying and look away and ignore it. Witches seem to have this exclusive, closed-off culture in Chaandesh - particularly Mohabumi, where Miriam barely feels at home despite being around what should be her own people. That's a very familiar feeling to us and we felt like it'd be nice to explore in her character.

Act 1:

The AU centers around Miriam being deaf and Kiwi is annoying by singing to her until she notices them and tells them she's deaf. Funny doodles from Rostrum.

Here's how Rostrum thought it'd go in Acts 2-5.

Act 2:

The introduction goes just the same, with everyone fingerspelling their names first, then Miriam and Saphy giving their sign names. Kiwi doesn't have one yet - they know enough ASL to communicate well with the witches but they weren't given a sign name back in Langtree. Art and sign names by Kyka.

In the caves, Miriam will warn Kiwi about the trolls, but doesn't hear the troll when he jumps up right behind her and roars. Kiwi is bowled over, but I thought it'd be funny if Miriam just stayed right there, completely immune to the troll's auditory screaming.

"i can explode him right here"

"NO MIRIAM!!! let me try singing!"

"i have magical powers and i'm not the one getting bowled over by some screeching kiwi."

She just narrowly misses the troll's attack with a visual warning from Kiwi and lets the bard sing to him.

Later into Act 2, Miriam does everything just the same - yes, even getting a ride with the Coffee Pirates. Just because she's deaf doesn't mean she can't communicate with like, a pen and paper, or basic gestures recognizable to the Delphi locals.

Act 3:

Not much changes, either. (Miriam in regular Wandersong is always annoyed with singing in this act, anyways.) Though for ease's sake, the mermaids would know sign language, so they could teach Miriam the Overseer song in order for her to reach Kiwi in the collapsed Chaoscape. We haven't exactly decided yet what the songs would look like if they aren't exclusively spoken songs, but the mermaids would teach Miriam a different version that doesn't involve singing.

Also she'd shake Kiwi by the shoulders instead of yelling at them to wake up. This is just how deaf people wake up :)

Act 4:

Essentially the same. If we go with characterizing Peter as a nice guy, he'd know some ASL already and would sign to her on that date as opposed to playing music. Ooooor depending on how a balalaika works, he might show her how the instrument feels to play, and that might be Miriam's first introduction (in-game) to instrumental music.

(The deafness doesn't really make her feel any worse than she already does in-game. I imagine Ira, Kiwi's mother, would be very curious about her deafness and ask her to teach the old lady a few signs.)

She would definitely enjoy playing the drums in the factory strike.

Meanwhile, Queen Order's castle. We meet Audrey. She's losing a little of her hearing at this point and is angry at the two for blocking her way. I haven't decided yet if she already has prior knowledge of ASL or not (leaning towards "no" but learns after she sees Miriam). She fights Miriam and actually can't speak to her, if she doesn't know ASL, but at least recognizes that she is deaf. After they finish fighting she yells and storms off - Kiwi would interpret for her after, I think.

Act 5:

Part One - Rulle

Night Sky

(Shard) I realized from this point onwards (after watching a playthrough) there's dialogue on the broom. I'm pretty sure you need at least one hand to steer a broom, but you can also sign with one hand, so let me just draw how I think that conversation would go.

...yeah, this wouldn't work with ASL. For so many reasons. It's akin to being in the driver's seat and turning your head around to see the other person signing in the backseat. While balancing precariously on a broom that you yourself are steering. While the other person has to practically lean sideways so you can see them. While you are less than a foot apart. In the dark moonlit night or while the sun is glaring at you.

Talking on the broom is a no-go.

...but I really don't want these conversations to be missed out on, so I'll say Kiwi convinces Miriam to land a little sooner so they can talk while walking to their destinations. Also, maybe a flame or light spell so they can actually see each other. Though it'd still be hard to talk.

Frontier Inn

(Shard) My wingmate skipped over the border towns part in hir earlier notes! I'll fill in this part.

The deaf witch would gesture for a pen and paper, but the innkeeper would be confused and speak to Kiwi first. They would interpret for Miriam and redirect the talking to her and it should go on the same from there, albeit with that bit of inaccessibility in mind.

Also, she has to be shaken awake after sleeping on the floor.

Lumber Town

In the forest just before, Miriam wouldn't notice the quietness - but she would notice the absence of the animals. Just pointing out how this is kind of a trope in horror, that something is going to be silent before it's scary, but it would not be scary to Miriam. Until she sees the ghosts.

Xiatian

(Rostrum) Lightning strikes are LOUD.

At this point, Audrey's hearing loss becomes noticeable to her and she finds that she struggles to understand people. She remembers the silly bard and witch using those weird flappy hands during her fight. Out of sheer spite she tries to learn the local sign language, but has to ask Eyala to basically give her the knowledge the same way the Dream King did for Kiwi, so she's ready and actually excited to sign with Kiwi and Miriam when they arrive in Xiatian.

and next time they see her in Rulle Miriam is like "wait YOU know how to sign??? HOW MUCH TIME DID WE SPEND IN CHISMEST"

Audrey's like heheh it's no biggie i want to be accessible to everyone <3

But in truth she's losing her hearing - and is half freaking out about it - and that is possibly why she trusts them to get the Potion of Power then and there. She sympathizes with Miriam. she's still arrogant though lol At the King's palace, the King might be a little suspicious of Kiwi interpreting for Miriam, but not as suspicious as he is of the witch herself. Interpreters can't be at all that uncommon in royal settings as they do need to negotiate with other countries. But Miriam would feel a little left out by the ghost singing through Kiwi - it depends on how the Spirit Language manifests and whether or not that's visible to deaf people. (I like to think it might be. But if Kiwi is the medium for the ghosts to speak through...)

... For a long time, we struggled to write this part where both Audrey and Miriam would learn the song. In the end, Vesta said this is how it would go:

(Vesta) Audrey is losing her hearing and tells the King to sing louder. He does. She says there has to be another way. The King sends her away and she's like RAAAUGHHH! Miriam follows her still, evading the palace guards.

Audrey stomps and Eyala appears. "Bestie, there IS another way!" She teaches her a different version of the song, with sign language, maybe, or a dance, but I like sign language better. It should be ASL poetry.

(Rostrum) And Miriam is able to memorize this after following her! Again, and unfortunately, the sunset sky scene doesn't happen. Though there might be a different scene where Miriam flew up to that "???" place Mask was at, with all of the butterflies, and is found tending to Kiwi when Kiwi wakes up and Miriam explains to her what's going on.

It's two days now.

Sky Temple (Sun Overseer's Song)

Instead of using a piccolo at all, Miriam has to sign the song that was given to Audrey. And instead of telling Kiwi to not listen too closely, she'd ask Kiwi to turn away so they can't see her awkward signing. Whether or not Kiwi actually does this is up to your imagination.

Part Two - Chaandesh

Before I go on ahead, a reminder. Chaandesh - and especially Mohabumi, and Miriam's reactions to feeling left out as a witch - that's the part that made us relate so strongly to her. And that is what inspired this AU.

One major difference in Chaandesh in this AU - though I don't think it changes the game very much - is that many witches do know ASL there, so some of the NPCs would sign to Kiwi! There would be a sizeable Deaf community in the city of witches especially. This isn't to say that all witches are deaf, but I wanted to point that aspect out as large Deaf communities do exist in most cities in reality.

And it'd also contribute to how left out Miriam feels, out of both the witch and deaf communities. It's difficult to get information about either if you just aren't part of them.

Mystery Forest

I'll say Vivian and Sandra know sign language, and would recognize that Miriam is deaf and sign normally to her. Everyone fights the monster and things go on as usual.

In the following sky ride scene where the Spell Squad flies them to the ferry... this IS the one scene where they could sign because someone else is flying the broom! Unfortunately there's very little dialogue in this scene.

The Ferry

I just want to point out this huge nugget of dialogue:

"This whole kingdom… feels like a big club, that I was never invited to."

The inspiration for this whole AU. This one line sparked all this. I'll explain more because I'm actually watching a playthrough just so I can get this AU as accurate as possible, so...

When Audrey appears, she'd probably talk in simcom, which is essentially a variant of ASL where you both sign and speak at the same time. Some might consider it offputting, but she'd be skilled enough at it - and she'd sign SO dramatically!

Mohabumi

Only going to speak on scenes where I think Miriam's dialogue OR actions would change.

In the academy, when Kiwi sees her struggling on the broom... I mean, there's no way she can both sign AND re-learn how to fly on the broom. For hilarity, I say she falls the first time Kiwi gets her attention, and more sensibly, hops off the broom every other time Kiwi talks to her there. I don't think the conversation about music would change at all.

The Crater...

... we've thought about this so many times but it's only now that I actually see the conversation that I realize we don't need to rewrite this at all. It's strange, because before this game, and ESPECIALLY before this part, we just didn't like music. We didn't know what it meant. We didn't know how it could motivate people and be compelling. It felt like a big club that we weren't invited to. Sound familiar?

It's hard to describe how the game changed our feelings on music. In some ways they stayed the same - it's still a little exclusive, but it felt like it opened our eyes to how influential it really could be. The emotions behind playing an instrument, or singing, or dancing. And dancing is a physical form of music! It reacts to vibrations! So Miriam would feel right at home here no matter what her hearing status is. The drumbeats of Manny's music, and potentially the speakers amplifying the music in general, would reach Miriam if this was a loud enough space. In that moment she'd feel like she belonged, being brought back to home where music too was played with drumbeats.

Broom Ride

This necessitates its own section because it's an important conversation and it breaks my heart that, again, in this AU it can't be had on the broom. But I want to give this conversation justice because it hit close to home for us.

Miriam: "It was weird being in a city of other witches. I thought it'd be a place where i fit in. But I didn't."

Kiwi: "That just means you're special!"

Miriam: "Well. Maybe... I don't want to be so special. I've been special my whole life. Around Delphi, me and Saphy were the only witches. I never knew someone else like me. And I guess I still don't.

It doesn't feel good to be different like this. I feel like I'm just messed up. And I'll never fit in anywhere."

Exactly what being deaf or any kind of disabled feels like. It feels like a very specific part of being autistic, too... we're autistic so we know this well.

Kiwi: "We're outsiders... together!"

Sky Temple (Eclipse Duet)

Another strange part of this AU we've thought about for a while! We imagined them dancing, or signing together, or such... but if the order of events demands that Miriam learned the signed version of the Sun Overseer's song, and Kiwi learned the spoken version of the Moon's...

I think the way Kiwi sings by pointing their hand, Miriam could see it visually and perhaps her own hand movements would even mirror Kiwi's. Or the other way around. I think Kiwi would make an effort to visually convey the nature of their half of the song to Miriam, strengthening the harmony... the same way the moon reflects the sun.

The Eclipse

Miriam gets hurt. She obviously can't hear or see Kiwi, so Kiwi would shake her in a desperate attempt to wake her as Audrey walks up - and Audrey at this point has lost a lot of her hearing, but I guess if Miriam is unconscious, there would be no reason for her to sign as she's only talking to the bard. Albeit by now, her speech is inflected with numerous gestures to emphasize her points.

Kiwi is angry enough to raise their voice. It's not enough for Audrey. Either she doesn't hear them and turns around to pay attention to them, or she never does because she never picked up the habit to pay attention to the things around her. When you grow up as a deaf person, your senses overcompensate for the one you never had or lost - this AU's Audrey doesn't have that advantage just yet.

When they carry Miriam down from the Sky Temple... there's no way you can sign to someone while carrying them at the same time. So that little snippet of conversation doesn't happen.

No other changes. Also, this part breaks my heart, I want you to know this.

Act 6:

Audrey's Introspection

Miriam isn't here, and technically this AU is all about her and how her deafness affects small details in the game. So if this AU was only about that we'd stop here and skip ahead to Act 7.

However, Audrey is deaf by this point. And she has to contend with that while ALSO dealing with a singing bard.

In her first appearance in this act, I think she'd monologue with her voice. She wouldn't hear Kiwi's complaints as she drinks the false Potion of Power and collapses in that same hilarious way. When they're in the cave, she continues speaking with her voice until she falls to her knees contending with her mortality.

The bard tries speaking to her at first. Then they sign to her. Audrey looks up and signs back. "Not without my sword. And hearing."

(Brief author's note: I gave Eyala the sign name of "EYE-la." This is a very fun sign name and she would introduce herself with it when she discovered Audrey was losing her hearing and taught her sign language.)

The conversation in the cave goes roughly the same... Audrey seems like the sort of person to shrug off even losing her hearing, thinking that's what she has to do to be the hero. It matters a LOT to her, deep down inside - Eyala told her it was necessary, that she wouldn't need her hearing in the end anyways - but it stings to gain a disability in exchange for being the hero, doesn't it?

Is it a blessing or a curse that she doesn't hear the wails of the Overseers and monsters she slays? That she can't hear the Bard's songs anymore?

But then, Miriam simply being there disproves all of that. She's another person who doesn't necessarily connect with music in the traditional sense. It took her a long time to truly feel comfortable with music as a foundation of the world. Being deaf doesn't make you ignorant to the world, after all... it makes the world ignorant to you. Being deaf her whole life means Miriam's had to grow up fighting to feel like she fits into the world at all. She carved out her own path in life.

The Beast

Theoretically, the Hero and Bard could sign to each other even at that distance where Kiwi is on the cliff and Audrey is down on the platform above lava. If you have good sight, ASL goes a long way.

Act 7:

I like to think this is when Miriam gives Kiwi a sign name after they both return to Langtree. Unfortunately, I still haven't thought of a sign name for the bard, so that's on hold for a while.

Kiwi wouldn't have to interpret for the fairies, I think they can speak any language they need to communicate in. And that includes sign language.

We neglected to say what the spirit language would look like to Miriam who has been trained to understand it, but I think it'd be symbols. Literal visual symbols. Up in the air. Since it's mentioned that Kiwi speaks in strange symbols, which is a visual element, I think Miriam can see or sense the symbols and understand. Which also means she understands what the Dream King says as his last words.

The boss fight goes on as usual. Audrey signs VERY angrily to them after having her sword taken - with aggressive body language, faster signs that the bard and witch just barely pick up.

The Choir

... I'll be honest with you, we agonized over this particular scene for a long time. In the original game, the highlight is Miriam singing in front of everyone.

A singing Miriam would undermine this AU. It isn't vocal chords that deaf people most naturally turn to for communication - it's hands. I don't think a deaf Miriam has any reason to use her voice to sing here, even when she can use her voice.

So a change I'm making here in order to make myself feel more comfortable with this scene is that more of the crowd would dance - in fact, I think all of the people of the world would harmonize in their own way, be it with their voice, an instrument, dancing, or whatever other funky way they like. Thusly, Miriam dances in the end. It shouldn't be only singing that saves the world.

It's sad that the creators of this game didn't put in other means of singing, or explain how deaf people would harmonize with a worldwide auditory song, but that's okay. I know how we can harmonize in our way.

...

And that's the end of this long-winded post about how Miriam could be deaf and that'd change very little about the story. Also, I'm very tired from writing half this dang post and I hope it makes sense to people who aren't deaf.

I hope you enjoyed reading! And don't be afraid to ask questions if you're curious about this AU!

- Rostrum

[spnfemslashbang]

Title: The Perfect Woman

Author: @friendofcarlotta

Artist: @KaylieMalinza

Rating: Mature

Pairing: Daphne Allen/Carmen Porter

Warnings: Internalized Homophobia

Additional Tags: Comedy, Mad Scientist Daphne, Bisexual Carmen Porter, Minor Castiel/Dean Winchester, Minor Daphne/Carmen/The Djinn Queen

Summary: When Daphne Allen discovers that her vanished husband Emmanuel is in fact the angel Castiel and is happily dating a man named Dean Winchester, she decides to take revenge. Step 1: Create a living replica of Carmen Porter, Dean Winchester’s perfect woman from a past djinn dream. Step 2: Watch Castiel’s relationship with Dean fall apart and dance on its ashes. What Daphne didn’t consider is that Dean is immune to Carmen’s charms these days — and that Daphne herself is not.

Posting on July 17

Keep reading for a short excerpt!

The door to Dean Winchester’s prison opens with a weary creak of rusty hinges. He smirks up at her from the chair where she has him bound with sturdy ropes. “You finally gonna deliver on that pie or—”

He breaks off abruptly, expression growing slack as he notices Carmen. He darts his eyes up to stare at the water-stained ceiling, his throat bobbing with a dry, clicking swallow. “Holy shit, lady, how many people do you keep down here and why the fuck is she naked?”

“Look at her.” Daphne’s voice trembles with the joy of her impending triumph. It’s so close that she can almost taste it in the basement’s mildew-scented air. “Look at her, Dean. Doesn’t she seem awfully familiar?”

Dean slowly lowers his head, squinting one-eyed at Carmen. The corded muscles in his neck strain with the effort of looking no further south than her chin. Then his lips part in surprise. “Shit. Carmen?”

“Hey, Dean.” Carmen smiles that disarming, beautiful smile of hers. “It’s nice to see you again.”

“Yeah, uh, same.” Dean is still determinedly looking anywhere but at Carmen’s bare breasts or the hair that curls thickly between her legs. “What… how are you here?”

“Oh! Funny story. Daphne here—” Carmen steps up to Daphne’s side and loops an arm around her waist. Daphne pulls away from the touch, carefully not looking at Carmen’s face in case she might find hurt or disappointment there. She doesn’t want to give Dean the wrong idea. “Daphne used a spell to make me corporeal. Pretty neat, huh?”

“Neat,” Dean says weakly, then mutters something under his breath that sounds suspiciously like "fucking witches." “Listen, uh, Carmen… could you maybe put on some clothes? It’s real hard — difficult — to have a conversation like this.”

Daphne smiles to herself at the Freudian slip. Everything is going according to plan, so she supposes she can be merciful. Dean’s comfort is of no importance to her, but Carmen’s… well, it is quite cold in this basement.

“One moment,” she says, and goes to fetch some clothes from the bag in her art studio. Carmen is rather more… curvy than Daphne, but the bathrobe and slippers ought to fit her.

[berberriescorner]

That girl is not about to babysit all those damn kids please😭

AND ISSSS! If momma needs help, baby girl gon’ provide 👏🏾. The middle child will put in the work as well. As the oldest, Marcus gonna help too😂🤣!

No, but seriously. Little momma needs to chill on her mother. The lady of the house is more than capable of taking care of all her babies. Daddy Rio is completely comfortable with her being a full-time mommy🥰😍.

Little Ms. Mamas can chill. She can babysit to earn some extra allowance.

Here y’all go getting another continuation out of me😒😂:

“Mama? May I upgrade to the new iPhone that just dropped? Daddy said he was cool with it. He said I have to run it by you first.”

“We just got you a new MacBook and AirPods. No ma’am. You can upgrade when your birthday rolls around.”

She kisses her teeth, instantly regretting it as you give her that look.

“Not you trying to have an attitude? See, that’s y’all’s problem. You’re so used to getting whatever you want.”

“My birthday isn’t for another three months. Please, ma? It’s not like we can’t afford it.”

Did she just…I know she didn’t just say that? See, Rio this is what happens when there isn’t a balance. We've created spoiled little monsters.

You took a deep calming breath. Trying to keep from raising your voice.

Gentle parenting, Y/N. Remember to practice gentle parenting.

“Correction. It’s not like WE can’t afford it. We, meaning your father and me. You must be confused, baby girl. I didn’t know you paid bills around here.”

Your oldest daughter huffed and rolled her eyes. Rio had walked in just in time to catch what you said. Watching his daughters reaction let him know he needed to step in.

“Baby girl, you know Daddy loves you with everything in me. Peep this though. Two very important things you need to learn, baby. One, I know that’s your mother, but that’s my wife. Watch your tone, cut the dramatics, and respect her, darlin'. All that huffing and puffing gotta go. Chill on rolling those eyes.”

Your chest swelled with pride as you thought, “I know that’s right, papa.”

Rio continued, “Second lesson of the day. Life’s not fair, darlin’. Now I was cool with it, so long as your mama was. Given your reaction to what she said. I noticed something else you need to learn. You want something bad enough baby girl, hustle for it.”

Your daughter looked at him quizzically.

“You want the phone bad enough. Pay for it.”

“That would take all my saved allowance.”

Rio shrugged, “find a hustle, baby girl.”

“Yes, sir."

Realizing that her father was right, she spoke again, “Sorry for acting like a brat, mama. I understand what you both are saying. If I want it, gotta earn it.”

Dear Lord. He’s going to turn all these children into finesse kings and queens. I don’t know whether to be worried or proud. It couldn't hurt to be both, right?

You embraced your daughter and kissed the top of her head.

“Look, I’m not trying to be hard on you, but sometimes we need to find balance. Yes, we love spoiling you and your siblings, but we want you all to know how to go out and get it on your own.”

Hearing you impart wisdom to your daughter, placed a smile on your husband’s face. He kissed both his babies on the forehead.

“I'll tell you what. Come up with half. Daddy and I will pay the rest, deal?”

Her face lit up, as she bounced up and down excitedly.

“Thank you, Mommy! How can I earn my half?”

You started to give suggestions when she cut you off.

“How about I babysit for the next four date nights? Nana wouldn’t mind if I sat in for her.”

Rio chuckled, “I thought you hated watching your siblings?”

“I don’t hate it, daddy. I don’t love it either, but bread is bread.”

“I feel you little hustla. Baby girl said a win is a win. This is a proud daddy moment. Yeah, that works for me.”

Rio pulled you closer, wrapping his arms around your waist. Kissing your neck a few times, he asked, “That alright with you, mama?”

You sighed happily, loving his sweet embrace.

“That’s fine with me, baby,” you responded, turning to peck his lips.

“Eww! Please don’t have another baby.”

“Girl hush and go check on your sisters. It’s too quiet in this house. Probably doing something they're not supposed to.”

“Fine, but can I get five dollars for my time?”

“Y/D/N,” Rio said authoritatively.

“Yes, sir. I’m going,” she chuckled.

Rio waited for her to leave the room. His hands gripped you tighter, nibbling your ear.

“I say we give her one more sibling to look after. Six sounds like a good number to stop," he whispered trailing kisses down your neck.

“I’d say no, but you’re not going to listen. I’m tired of being pregnant,” you teased.

“You ain’t tired of making them though.”

[artsspangledpumpkin]

Because I love worldbuilding so much, I decided to create an Ozian Calendar and thought I'd share it.

The Ozian day is 26 hours long, there are seven days in a week, twelve weeks in a season, and four seasons in a year, leading to 336 days in a year. Each year is symmetrical, each day falling on the same day of the week without fail. The days of the week are named after seven of Lurline’s fairies who helped her construct Oz in the beginning when everything still needed moving along. The Calendar is based on the Lunar cycle.

The names of Lurline's fairies who helped her form Oz: Mona, Tuesin, Wednessa, Thur, Fridda, Saturno, and Sun.

The format for the Ozian Calendar is read DAY SEASON YEAR. Before the Wizard of Oz took over, the calendar followed the Ozma Dynasty so it would read 54 SPRING 3104 Y.O.L.O (or Year of Our Lady Ozma). After Oscar takes over the format is 54 SPRING 1 D.O. (or Dynasty of Oz)

Note: This list of holidays and their dates are not canon or comprehensive. You don’t have to use any of these or you can come up with your own. I’d love to hear about them.

HOLIDAYS under the cut

New Years Day/Winter Solstice: 1 WINTER

Vinkun Festival of Lights: 84 AUTUMN - 7 WINTER

The Festival of Lights lasts eight days and celebrates both the end of the Ozian Calendar year. Over the course of the festival, candles are slowly lit adding one each night to represent the days getting longer and hopes of a good spring. Some areas go to temples to make wishes and ask for good fortune for the New Year while other areas release paper lanterns with their wishes written inside.

Lurlinemas: 6-7 WINTER (Ozian version of Christmas)

Day of Queens: 15 WINTER

In some sections of Oz, this is the day children are given presents instead of on Lurlinemas. Schools use this day to host pageants and talent shows.

St. Amora’s Day: 43 WINTER

Amora was a matchmaker who would bring couples together and help them fall in love by using enchanted arrows. She fell in love with a mortal man, but her arrows didn’t work on him so she had to woo him the old fashioned way. She presented him with sweet smelling flowers to make his days bright and fragrant and sugared dates and honeyed nuts to give him sweetness, and though she was busy she set aside time to be with him. They fell in love, but the day they were meant to be wed, he was killed. Every anniversary, she brought flowers and sweets to his grave. She never loved again, her heart bleeding so much, her bird companions offered to share her pain. Tradition lives on in showing your sweetheart that you care about them by giving flowers and sweets and decorations of hearts and punays.

Discount Candy Day: 44 WINTER

St. Rependi’s Day: 71 WINTER

Brother to St. Amora, represents requited (or unrequited) love. This day is used to give return presents (or dish out rejections) given by admirers on St. Amora’s day

Spring Equinox: 1 SPRING

St. Platonia’s Day: 15 SPRING

A day for children to show appreciation to their parents.

Earth Day: 43 SPRING

Deemed the day to celebrate the creation of Oz. Usually spent by showing appreciation to nature which now moves by itself rather than needing help by Lurline’s fairies to move along.

Cotillion (Munchkinland): 61-63 SPRING

Traditionally for matchmaking, now used as one big debutante ball for all who have come of age in the past year. Wealthier families have balls for one child, though it’s more common to wait for Cotillion so everyone enters the season together.

Vinkun Festival of Trees: 40-43 SPRING

Gillikin Spring Festival: 40-47 SPRING

Munchkin Spring Festival: 40-46 SPRING

Vinkun Poppy Festival: 67 SPRING

Summer Solstice: 1 SUMMER

Vinkun Summer Solstice Festival: 1 - 8 SUMMER

Festival begun to hope for a good harvest in the autumn. Celebrated with bonfires, dancing, and good food. Midway point of festival a sacrifice is offered up in the bonfire. Since Great Drought the “sacrifice” is a bundle of grass and a wooden animal. Second to last day is spent fasting and at temples, final day has a huge feast. More devout households and the temples will begin the festival with eight candles and extinguish one each day to represent the days becoming shorter and to remind that the days of plenty are temporary just as the lean days are.

Music Festival (Quadling Country): 78 SUMMER

Autumn Equinox: 1 AUTUMN

Wizard Arrival Day: 2 AUTUMN

Vinkun Harvest Festival: 36-42 AUTUMN

Celebrates end of the harvest and is traditionally a way for tribes to get together to exchange goods. People clean their homes and prepare for winter during this time

St. Sowren’s Day: 43 AUTUMN

On this day, the realms of Oz would shift where the angels and fairies could not cross into Oz, but the creatures of the demon realm could, leaving them unchecked. St. Sowren was left behind before they could return to their realm and they discovered that by donning frightening masks and offering up sweets to anyone scary enough, the demons grew confused and would leave the disguised alone, suspicious of their gifts.

Gillikin custom dictates this is a day to visit family graves and shrines which they clean and leave offerings on inviting their deceased loved ones home for the evening for a party. A day of remembrance. In the last century, costumes are also worn by children to collect treats (part of their haul is shared with their family) or by adults for parties.

Ozma De-throned Day: 68 AUTUMN

New Year’s Eve: 84 AUTUMN

[anatrik]

First thoughts TTPD:

What a lana x folklore girlie win this issss!

1.Fortnight is about matty?? HAHAHAHA also why did this make me think of when holt was going running with the ladies when he was in witness protection??? Crying. Fav line has to be they were supposed to take me away but they forgot to come and get me. So sad but also so cool in relation to her cancellation/return. 10/10

2. TTPD- not so hahahaha anymore IS THIS ACTUALLY A FUCKING MATTY HEALY ALBUM??? There was a typewriter at the 1975 show she performed anti-hero at? Unless its somehow about harry? Who else is tattooed on her roster??? Or is this about herself? Kinda feel like modern idiots/who’s going to decode is directed at us lol😂 9/10?

3.My boy only breaks his favourite toys- went in expecting mad woman rage. Pleasantly surprised. king of my heart to queen of sandcastles he destroys….DESTROYED ME. Are you fucking kidding me rn? Im caling it. Best song. Im crying at 7.30 am this is not funny anymore. Also THANK YOU FOR NOT SLANDERING DAD. I knew you wouldnt let us down like that. Also the chorus sounds like long story short😭 oh this is so sad. Once i fix me hes going to miss me? He was my best friend?😭 he runs because he loves me? Stopp😭😭 1000000/10

4.Down bad- ….aaaand we’re back to MATTY AGAIN? He does not deserve this spotlight but why are all the song so goood😭😭😭 is this why artists love to date problematic men? It unlocks some extraordinary potential? Crazy crazy girl😭 also stay down (bad) 🤌🏾 shes done it again 10/10 also for personal reasons i will be believing this is about joe in that Tom/Joe/met gala overlap period when she was photographed going to the gym a lot and that this is about all that yearning please let it be about that plesplesplesplesplesples also down bad waking up in blood staring at the sky…like i lost a twin is giving bigger than the whole sky🥺

5. So long, london- so so long long, lon-don DONE? ok miss girl😭 the hoax parallels😭 dont be undoing the song i was going to play at my weddddding what is wrong with you😭 my only one my smoking gun to two graves one gun youll find someone??? Also reminds me of la la land :/ how much sad did you think I had in me? You wrote hoax so a lot ok leave us alone. crying again. 10000000000000000/10 oh lol its a track 5 ofc it is😂

6. But daddy I love him- she really said if you ever liked, shared or even LOOKED at the ‘vivaa las vegas’ memes you cant come to the wedding and shes so real for it. Lfgggg. Ubothered unhinged uhmazing. Growing up precocious sometimes means you still hold on to that princess/quarterback wattpad fantasy AS IS YOUR RIGHT QUEEN GO THE FUCK OFF🥳 100000/10 calling out toxic fandom for the first time and we love to see it🫡 this is suchhhh a happy songggg you deserve ALL the chaos and revelry.

7. Fresh out the slammer- god she gets it. Like sure he was great and he is still my biological father and everything but as a decidedly melancholy person myself who has constantly had atleast one close friend in a deep depression I can see how all that heavy lifting can just get heavy at some point especially when youre a partner and their sole lighthouse in wtv storms be out there buffeting their mental health. Its not for everyone and thats so fair and so valid but so sad as well. 10/10 for the honesty.

8. Florida- she really said girlrot summer🫡 this is the lanaest song ever. So lucky one/nothing new coded. This will be the First song I repeat and then so long london. Aaaghhh how i love a self aware melancholic anxious little superstar. 90283749292/10 thank you for giving florence an entire verse whew. Little did you know your home’s really only a town you’re just a guest in is soooo going on my body forever

9. Guilty as sin?- honestly just fuck if it means we dont have to hear about how desirable ratty healy is man ffs. IThe only reason he looks so hot is bc hes forbidden. You have to trust me on this. He’s sooo mid JESUS. U cant be writing hozier lyrics about a man that hasn’t met a shower😭 1000000/10 writing. -16392992/10 content. Unrequited love/lust truly is the greatest weapon in a poets arsenal bc where is this energy in the joe songs binch?😭 this is such a teen in love with a 26 yo creep who called me so mature for my age mom you just dont get ittt anthem😂😂

10. Who’s afraid of little old me?- is a warning 😂 im so here for it. Like yes I still hate matty with all my heart and soul but yes I agree fans should not be allowed so much of an opinion on another persons life and yes I should be afraid (I am). She said aight love letter era over I AM WRITING YOU ALL HATE MAIL AND I’M HAND DELIVERING IT. Shes sooo done pretending to be the relatable girl next door when she’s anything but and is now reminding us of it and yes yes yessss girl OWN ITTTTTTTT. I’ve been saying for agesssss that there is a darkness under all that sunshine from where she clawed her way to the top and this is sooo vindicating. 10000000000000/10 favourite song ever. Mad woman wishes she was who’s afraid of little old me. I am unwell. I am in love. This is the Taylor Swift i stan. The marketing genius the calculating business woman the puppet master with narcotics in her songs thats why we sing along🫡 she so can handle a dangerous man

11. I can fix him (no really I can)- you cant.

12. loml- ofc. OFC. Its the saddest song of all time. OFC. Fuck offf ughhhh. 😭😭😭😭😭 its giving happiness. Its giving divorce. i am a child of a broken home now and my parents still love each other and hold so much regret still. What do i do with thissss? Im just a little girl taylorrr! 1002380292011010101/10 soo so gooood.

13. I can do it with a broken heart- first of all track 13. Love it. Second of all the upbeat barbieness of it all. Third of all I FINALLY PLACED IT. Shes in her unrelatable era. She is not your girl next door. You will never understand her life. She is as much a phenomenon as a person and we literally only see as much as she allows us to and honestly if i have to get put in my place theres noooo better way to have it done. Im having such a great time actually. 10 BILLION TRILLION OUT OF 10 you tellll em girl you FUCKING TELL EM.

14. Smallest man who ever lived- not going to speculate on who it is bc they clearly had a serious problem and its not a joke but damn :/ thats so sad :/ hope they get help? Didnt expect this to be what the song was about at all?

15. The alchemy- she said TRAVIS IS MY BOY WITH HER WHOLE CHEST😌 10/10

16. Clara bow- did she just name drop herself ? I was so right about unrelatable era. Also the Subtle nod to olivia/sabrina noted and appreciated. Lucky one/castles crumbling (mature version) fr fr. Solid legacy song.

17. The black dog- shared your secrets with and location is the same whiplash as a red rose grew up out of ice frozen ground with no one around to tweet it🤌🏾 joe songs hit so so different 😭😭😭 1000000000/10

18. imgonnagetyouback- the valiant roar was not so valiant and more of a mew i guess. 7/10

19. The albatross- oh this is the ONE. The album defining song for sureeee. Mad woman on coke. A rose by any other name is a scandal???? Thats my religion right there. Little last great American dynasty twist there at the end! Fuck yea. She does reallly try to warn the men in her life have to give her that. One gazillion/10

20. Clearly god has favourites and they are the ppl called chloe or sam or sophia or marcus😭 ALSO this song is about joe for sure. The internet starlet hasss to be delaney rowe!!!! It HAS TO BE. 10/10

21. How did it end?- shes back for the fans😂 plot twist the breakup is with yall🤌🏾 but yesss say it louder! One gasp and then how did it end. So good. 100/10

22. So high school- lmao aristotle grand theft auto ONLYY taylor swift man😭😂 you know what you want and boy you got her🫡🫡 11/10

23. I hate it here- mother’s having a mental breakdown kids yk the drill🤌🏾 10/10

24. ThanK you aIMiee- what better way to say fuck you to a hater than to thank her for jumpstarting your legacy my god!!! She is insane for this. The capitalisation is a bit petty tho ngl. 8/10

25. I look in peoples windows- once again I thank you for the kindness and respect shown to joe. Never doubted you but thank you nevertheless. 10/10 short as nice to have a friend but it didnt need to be longer.

26. The prophecy- its so sad and humbling to see even a woman at where she is having to beg for love bc that literally is the nature of love. Something humiliating, to have to beg for 🤷‍♀️ cards playing out like fools in a fable cursed like eve got bitten. No one writes like her damn. 10/10

27. Cassandra- very madeline miller on this one. Love love loveee modern takes on tragic greek women. 100/10

28. Peter- ah fuck. This one is going to hurt (it did). 1000000/10 my ribs get the feeling she did😭 all her joe related aches are so bone deeeep ugh. Promises oceans deep but never to keep😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 oh god it hurtsss it hurts it hurtss

29. The bolter- curious child ever reviled except by her father wow.

30. Robin- OMG! I needed this song growing up sooo bad. That way to go tiger felt so so warm like running into a kitchen after a day of being in the mud and u tell ur mum the silly things u did and shes genuinely interested and impressed by your smol victories. A bajillion/10

31. The manuscript- postmortem of every ex ever🤌🏾 love it.

[friendsoup]

Self Care With The Ladies!

Recipe: Helena, Anne, Vera, and Tracy x Reader (all separate), romantic, headcanons, date night, gn!reader, stressed! reader, they/them pronouns used once, reader is called beautiful and gorgeous, reader has make up put on them, cuddles

WC: 639

Chef's Note: I noticed there wasn't a ton of girls in the idv x reader tag!!! That is a tragedy, and something I aim to fix. I wanted to do something simple and self indulgent today! Hope nobody minds ;w;

Helena

Gets annoyed when you attempt to hide how tired you really are. Tells you off for not taking care of your own needs. She seems rather angry, but it comes out of pure concern for you.

Finds a small nook in the manor for the two of you to hide in, unbothered by the rest of the residents. Has you lay down beside her, resting your head on her lap, while she reads to you.

"It says here that y/n is actually the most beautiful person in the world! Fancy that!" You try to argue with her, and she asks you to prove it. You cannot prove it, as you can't read braille. She smiles down at you, feeling as though she's gotten away with something great.

Will read to you until you fall asleep, then she'll simply sit and enjoy your presence.

Anne

Has prepared a new game for the two of you to play!

She's brought some cookies and hot chocolate for the occasion, and has made sure the room is super cozy.

She doesn't outwardly say she knows your stressed, nor does she push you to talk about it. Claims that she's only doing this to have a fun time.

She explains the rules to you as best she can, though she's so excited to play with you that she can't formulate a proper description. Claims that you'll understand more once the two of you begin playing.

The two of you have friendly banter while playing. She jokes about how badly she's going to crush you, and you try to return her energy.

She beats you the first couple of times, and then starts letting you win.

"You're getting really good!" She could demolish you in two rounds

Ends the night drinking the last of your hot chocolate while looking at the stars.

Vera

Notices something off about you immediately. Can sniff out the fact that you're spreading yourself thin effortlessly.

Her solution? A makeover!

She invites you to her room, and gives you the spa treatment

She goes through her skin care routine, all the while complimenting you for how great you look. Recommends all sorts of tricks for taking care of yourself.

Doesn't use too much make up, just highlights your "natural beauty"

Once she's done, she dresses in an outfit she hand picked for you, doing little bits of maintenance to make sure it fits perfectly.

You can hardly recognize yourself in the mirror when she's done. You look better than you ever had before.

The two of you then head to dinner, and she takes great care in showing you off to everyone you pass.

"Don't they look gorgeous? My, you'd think I was dining with a movie star!"

Tracy

The QUEEN of parallel play

The both of you are the same amount of stressed. She's been working on something that hasn't been going great, and the manor has been playing tricks on your mind. She suggests the two of you just do something to relax.

She leans on your shoulder while fidgeting with a puzzle, and you busy yourself with your own hobby.

When she finds herself getting frustrated, she buries herself in your neck, breathes in deeply, and then returns to her game. The first time it startles you, but by the third time you find it comforting.

Eventually, the two of you grow bored with your respective busy work, and decide on getting a snack.

The entire time she's touching you. Holding your hand, leaning on you, or resting her head on your shoulder. She loves simply basking in your presence.

While eating, the two of you chat about anything and everything. The conversation grows emotional quickly, with the two of you expressing how stressed you've been lately.

"I'm lucky to have you." She means every word

[descendantofthesparrow]

What’s your timeline for the movies?

I’m trying to write something of my own but I can’t figure the timeline out

hooooooooooooooo boy yeah i had a whole mental breakdown over this lol, i made my own for my rewrite fic because canon makes no sense. so the only CONFIRMED timeline is the time between d1 and d2, six months 'six months ago i was stealing candy from babies-Mal during the 'talk scene' between the c4. D3 is implied to be about two weeks? so vk day-aka the start-one week later-vk pick up day, hades attacks, Audrey steals the scepter-the next day, Jnaes birthday, the meeting, the whole adventure, and then a week later is the engagement party/the end of the movie.

but blah blah blah-so my timeline was, starts in January, though it should at the very least start in October considering a side book that mentions the coronation/the maleficent incident happening on October 18th, BUT-with d2 being six months later, and another side book says cotillion happened June 24/5th, so the end of the school year, and six months before that is January.(i know some people don't like using the side books as a timeline calculator but it helps to make my brain hurt less so shush(love you dani))

okay anyway, starts in January, takes about-two three weeks to go through the movie, ends on a Friday-the coronation, which in January 2015-when the movie 'takes place', makes sense for me so-

this is my d1 timeline, aligned with January 2015. and Ben's birthday for me is January 16th, his coronation day, since its implied his birthday is coronation day in the movie.

D2-Six months later, in June, in the movie-its kind unclear just how the timeline spans, but it is 3 days, so start-which is on a Thursday since their picnic date is on a Thursday, Mal runs away that Thursday afternoon, vks and Ben come after her late Thursday/early Friday, Mal makes deal with Uma Friday and either the wand trade happens Friday at noon or Saturday at noon-but either way in the movie, the wand trade is the same day as cotillion-but i exnayed that and made cotillion the next day, Saturday, so Evie had time to actually change Mal's dress.

D3---whooo boy, this is where it gets confusing-so D3~! there is no clear thoughts of how long its been since 3, it's either been less than a year, OR its been NEARLY 3 YEARS, no in-between-but! the vks, minus Carlos, according to Escape from the isle, have graduated from Auradon prep-Ben, Mal, Evie, and Jay are all 18-19 at the very least, with Carlos at 17 and now a senior-and they were all 16 in the first movie, minus Carlos at 14, Jane is his age as well, so they're both 14-17 in d1 to D3, so that implies it's been at LEAST 2 years if not 2 and a half. so, from d1 to d3-its been 3 years, at least my version was, because it was the only way to make sense of their age jumps, how the vks graduated, and to give Mal and Ben just a bit more time to make their engagement make more sense because WOW she just had a mental breakdown over becoming lady of the court?! she does not need to be queen yet dear god no, she needs therapy not a crown.

that also allows for the visual changes of everything, like the new bridge plaza in both Auradon and the isle, along with giving Evie her starter castle-to which Doug says in d2to evie 'maybe in the next 3 years, you'll get that castle you always wanted(paraphrased)

but yeah the timeline is a whole mess, you'll be better off just making your own like i did, there is no timeline, only zuul.

but yeah, short version, D1-six months later-D2-2 and a half years alter-D3.

[thequeenofneverland1]

Aegon II Targaryen///My Beautiful Flower

Warning: character death

Anonymous request: can i request a Aegon II targaryen where she gets sent to the kingdom to married the future king but she doesn't want to since she's in love someone who's a pinter but she ends up going and Arrangely she falls in love with him and marrying him so they end having kids could their kids be the one in the series but she's pregnant and so the king asks to find a pinter that can Paint him and his queen he wants to show everyone the love that he has for his queen BTW the king built a throne for his queen so she doesn't have stand by beside him when the pinter sees that girl that he is in love with moved on he ends up ending his life

You were the most beautiful woman in the world that's why every parent wants you to be the wife for their sons, but you always say no to them because you were already in love with someone with someone named Leo the painter

You knew your mother wouldn't approved since he's a lowborn Painter and your a highborn you always thought if all of the parents were like your mother not wanted their sons or daughters to be with someone lower than their status

The Queen Alicent have heard about your beauty when she asked to see you she was shocked to see that you were in fact the most beautiful person that she has seen she wanted you for her son

"I found a beautiful woman for you son." Alicent tells her son the Prince Aegon the second

"But Mother, I don't want to wed a stranger." Aegon said

She rolls her eyes, "her name is Y/n Y/l/n she won't be a stranger anymore because tomorrow she'll come for the betrothed ceremony."

"Do I have to?" He asks not clearly happy

"Yes, She's a highborn beside She's a beautiful lady She'll give birth to beautiful babies."

Leo and you were laughing and chasing each other. He picked you up to spin you around you let out a giggle, "I love you so much Y/N darlin."

"I love you too." You smiled as you pulled him into a kiss

"I've been thinking about our wedding." He tells you

"I've been thinking about it too. I can't wait to be wed to you. I can't wait to start a beautiful family." You beamed

"I just know you're going to be the most beautiful bride ever."

"Y/n get away from that low life." Your mother angrily tells you

"Mother, he's not a low life, he's my boyfriend soon to be my husband." You tell her back

"Who gave you the permission to date? Mostly, if he doesn't belong in our society." She barks

"Leo, please excuse us. I need to talk to my mother." You tell him with a smile

"Are you sure love? I can stay. " He glances at you then at your mother

"Are you deaf? My daughter said to leave." She barks again

"Okay, I'll leave no need to be rude about it. " He kissed your cheek "see you tomorrow love?"

You nod with a smile "see you tomorrow."

She says, "Sorry, sweetheart, but you'll never see Leo again."

You give her a confused look "Mother, what are you talking about?"

She smiles "the Queen asked for your hand in marriage for her son, Prince Aegon the second and I said Yes."

"Why did you say yes? I don't want to marry him." You tell her

"Because you're so gorgeous, you deserve to be the queen. I'm sorry but you have to marry him, the Queen wants it and so do I." She smiles

"But Mother, I want to marry someone because I love them, not because I have to." You bewailed

"You will learn to love him so much that you will forget this dwarf artist who will not give you a good life like Prince Aegon the second."

"Can I at least say bye to him?" You pleased

She shakes her head "no because I don't want you to run off with him so you'll just leave him a letter that I wrote for you."

You wanted to disagree with your mother because you wanted to say your bye to Leo in person. not in a letter. you wanted to explain everything to him in person. not on paper, but you knew that you couldn't fight with your mother so you did agree with the letter

"Are you excited to start a new life as the Queen honey?" Your mother asked

"I guess so." You give her a sad smile

She gives you a hug "I know it's hard but you'll learn to love him."

"I'm so sorry Leo for doing this to you." You whispered to yourself

Your mother and you bowed "Your grace it's so amazing to be In front of you."

Queen Alicent smiled "and it's amazing to finally meet the beautiful lady Y/n who's going to be the queen and the wife of my son."

You smiled "thank you, your grace! I'm happy to be wed to your son and happy to serve the kingdom."

"Mother?" You heard a voice talk behind you, causing you to turn around to look at the person you were stunning to see Prince Aegon the second looking at you with love on his eyes

"Son, meet your betrothed, see I told you she's beautiful." She beamed

The Prince kissed your hand "it's pleased to meet you my beautiful flower."

You blushed, "I'm pleased to meet you, my king."

One year later

"Is the throne nearly complete?" King Aegon asks

"Your grace, not yet it should be complete by next week." James says

Aegon got up from his throne angrily "What do you mean? By next week? I want it done by tomorrow."

"I know your grace but the builders will probably need more gold to finish the throne by tomorrow." James shuddered

"Then give them more gold. I don't care how much it costs to have my beautiful flower throne finished. If it's not finished by tomorrow I'll have your head understood?"

James shuddered again "Yes your grace."

"So did you find a Painter that can paint my family and I?" Aegon asks

James nods his head "Yes I did, his name is Leo I have heard that he's good at painting people, so I let him know that he we need him for tomorrow so he's coming."

Aegon smiles "great you may leave now I'm gonna spend time with my beautiful flower and my kids."

James nods with a smile and bows before leaving

"Hey my beautiful flower, how has your day been?" Aegon kissed you

You kissed back with a smile "better when I'm with you."

"Hi daddy." Your son hugs his father

Aegon picks his son "Hey little one, where's your sister?"

Jaehaerys laughs "asleep."

"I think we should all head to bed too since we have a long day ahead of us." Aegon said

"My beautiful flower, do you always wake up looking this beautiful?" Aegon cooed

You blush "Aw my king you always find a way to make me smile."

"Cause it's true my beautiful flower I love you so much." He expressed "get ready and meet me at the Iron throne room. I have a surprise for you."

You start walking into the iron throne room with your handmaiden you were shocked to see a another throne next to your husband's throne

"Aegon what's this is?" You asked

"I told the builders to build a throne for you so you can sit next to me instead of standing." He tells you "Do you like it? my beautiful flower?"

You let out tears "like it? I love it, my king? I didn't mind standing. I bet it cost a lot of gold to build it."

Aegon wiped your tears off "I'm glad you do and no my flower I can't have you standing on your beautiful foot for too long and I don't care how much it costs me beautiful flower happy one year anniversary."

"My king by the way I'm pregnant again." You smiled

He kissed your lips "you don't know how happy you make me be. I can't believe that I'm gonna be a father again."

"Your grace." James bowed to Aegon then to you "the painter is here."

"The painter?" You asked confused

"Yes, my flower he's going to paint us first then he's gonna paint us with our kids."

Aegon and you went to the gardens holding hands you could feel your heart break when you saw Leo giving you a sad look

"Leo, make sure you're not staring at Queen Y/n for too long. The king gets jealous if men stare at his beautiful flower." James tells him since he noticed him looking at you

Leo hide his tears when he had it to drawing the king and Queen the queen that he still loved he wanted to cry more when he got asked to draw pregnant you with your kids and your husband

When he got finished he got paid and left the kingdom he quickly pull out a tiny bottle of poison out of his pocket

"I'll always love you my darling, even if you no longer love me see you soon. " Leo drinks the poison causing him to fall down on the ground

"My king, I love you and the kids so much."

He pulled you into a kiss "we love you as well my beautiful flower."

A/n: Leo it's a character from a series that I used to watch and he was a Painter as well, and also he gets his heart broken when he sees the women that he loves move on and also he dies from Poison so the request it reminded of me of him, so that's why I chose him

[sylvanas-girlkisser]

Please please please expand on this milf campaign I need to know more

YEAH!!!!!!!!

So backstory first: imagine a cross between a lovecraftian elder god, and one of those christian momfluencers who just WILL NOT STOP having children due to an unexamined breeding kink. That's Illucia Starsong the woman who ate the gods.

Anyways 2 bazillion years ago the world basically existed in her image, then 1 billion years ago her 7 daughters (each themed around an element) teamed up to kill her. But then they chickened out last minute and instead trapped her inside the vault of her castle, and placed said castle at the bottom of a frozen lake.

The daughters went their separate ways, with Althaya (whose domain is nature) being the only one who tried to keep them in contact. A big part of Althaya's self image was being a healer and caretaker, so after a century or two of more and more of her sisters going no contact, she got married to a demon summoning warrior king. Cause you know, she could fix him.

So when that didn't work out, and her sisters weren't around to emotionally support her after the breakup/help her trap her ex in eternal torment underneath the roots of a tree, she decided to enter her villain phase.

Fast forward to now: After spending ages ruling an evil empire from the shadows Althaya, now going by matron Sortrose, has decided that if not even having children is going to fix the sense of loneliness she feels inside, her only choice is getting mom out from under the ice. Everything was way better when mom was in charge anyways! They were a family, and everybody loved her and saw what a kind and generous person she is!

So the high concept of the campaign is: the party having to track down the other 6 of Illucia's daughters and help them work through their issues so they can stop Althaya from unleashing the biblically accurate milfpocalypse.

And of course, since all her daughters have been around for a while, they're now all milf-aged, but because there's an in-universe justification, they don't count against my milf quota!! Also since the sisters are all some flavor of dyke, it means I also get to give them milf-aged girlfriends/wives who also don't count against my quota!!! #milfmaxing

So here's the seven sisters and their respective element and flavor of milf:

Ammanhue (magic) - witch milf

Aglaroth (Earth) - army/dad milf

Althaya (nature) - evil queen milf

Asper (air) - fuckboy butch milf

Aunrak (water) - paladin butch milf

Allustriel (fire) - unfuckable scientist milf (she's aroace)

Armillah (ice) - auntie milf (yes she has packed the party lunch, more than once)

Also a few other key milves from the story

Vivian Trench - detective milf, who is also a litteral cougar lady

Rhiannon - travelling magic item seller, with the approximate vibe of a used car salesman

Mocauhqui and Delilah - a couple of revolutionaries, who after succeeding in overthrowing the colonizers are doing a GREAT job at handling their trauma.

And of course my personal favorite: Azzy (aka. Azganriel the angel of love)

So, since Illucia is such a great and normal mom, when she learned her beloved daughter Asper was battling depression and addiction, she was like "I know what will help: a girlfriend who will act as a second mom when I'm not around." So then she created an angelic being in her own image, with limited capacity for independent thought, and sent her off to be Asper's girlfriend/caretaker.

It worked out about as well as you can imagine, but in the process, Azzy gained self-awareness which she used to be a huge slut. Her and Asper are bros now, and instead she's dating Aunrak.

So you've got this literal angel, loose fitting white gown and all (and a pair of melons to concuss a dragon), who is dating the most paladin to ever paladin. But she's also an endless source of innuendos, and will take any excuse to get her tits out, which never fails to turn said paladin wife into a tomato.