#you can do whatever you want forever etc
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i'm very used to posting & sharing my textile work and feeling confident and secure in it but i get so nervous at the thought of sharing my drawing and painting work bc it's not nearly as technically skilled and professional looking but i need to beat the gremlin in my head telling me i can't share something i've done unless it meets that standard with a spiked bat
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#forever puppy <3#lee know#kim seungmin#stray kids#skz#skz gifs#bystay#skzedit#gagwanzsource#fr though everyones insistence he like wouldnt deal with a dog or whatever had me rolling my eyes#how many times do i have to say that cat guy can love a dog too!! raise a dog!! lee know said he wants to raise a dog in the future#the insistence youre a cat person or a dog person must end. its like being bisexual when people tell you to choose like Naw i dont think so#it was like comments on the kitten interview bein like Wow 🥺 chan was nice to the cats even tho he has a dog 🥺#of course he was you clown. hes even nice to bugs. whatre you thinking#everyone reading these tags pls note: its 2am and i have strong feelings about animals or idk- stop pigeonholing lee know#only pigeon him when he has pigeon hair etc etc.#bye#im not actually angry i just love tangenting on gifsets bc i love to do it
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Seriously tho, using “this isn’t realistic” as an excuse to hate on a non-mammal OC having boobs or a dragon having four legs and wings instead of being a wyvern or a taur or a taur dragon robot having six limbs and wings and boobs or whatever is the most small brained shit
“this isn’t realistic”- motherfucker, nothing in art is real! It’s all made up for the sake of creation! For joy! For the Vibes, be they gender or otherwise! Fuck off with trying to restrain imagination!
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protective big sister vee freaking out on hunter because she saw his own bloodstains in the castle dungeons & thinks he lied to her about the isles being safer now. and him truly honest to god at first having NO idea what she's talking about. she accuses him of lying about the dungeons being empty ("i didn't??") and accuses him of more unethical torture experimentation ("i DIDN'T") and then finally she's like don't treat me like i'm STUPID. it was MY CELL. i know what my own blood looks like and it's not that!!
and hunter stares at her for a moment and then just.
starts laughing.
vee just about kills him.
she's like this is Not funny. you are Not cute. & he's like no, no, sorry, just-
and pushes up his sleeves to show her the new ropy scars wrapping around his arms, like. i didn't want to trouble luz when she can't remember me. but sure. i should've clarified.
no one's been in the dungeons since i left them.
#toh#princess luz au#princess luz au amnesia timeline#torture#etc#vee noceda#hunter toh#cue hunter also being like you went BACK to the isles for her???#okay i immediately trust you implicitly actually. you can do whatever you want to me forever. we're allies
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Hornets neat time then i shut off my phone and nap
Really dont love how people in the fandom are infantilizing pomni more since ep 3. She. Explicitly stated in ep 2 she doesnt like that!!! I cant be the only one who thinks its.... Weird to do that. To a full grown woman who's depressed discomfort about being treated like a kid
Like it obviously doesn't actually matter, its fiction but..... it's making me raise my brow
#tadc#do whatever you want forever etc#but uhghhghh im a bit tired of the rveryone needs to take care of pomni especially kinger who is her dad now#bit#like . she can certainly see him as a father figure/mentor whatever without the .#👍#tadc spoilers
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hm
thinking of my blorbos but not in a "i love you you love me all is well" way but a "i love you hope you kill me" way lol
#cylas vents#negativity#negative#death wish#lmao#bitches be like '[potentially concerning thing]' and then add 'lol' as if it's funny or a joke lmao#like i mean technically it's not but then again it is bc it's me. like yeah don't worry don't take this seriously don't mind me ok#it doesn't really matter anyway kk. or maybe it's more like I'm the joke.#like idk the thought that like most of my f/os would probably kill me on sight should be less comforting than it is i guess#imagine casually making posts like this and still being like 'ok but maybe im not actually mentally ill maybe im faking maybe im lying to#myself maybe im making excuses maybe im imagining things maybe im just lazy' etc etc#none of the antidepressants since fluoxetine decided it's over have done shit and even my psychiatrist now is always like 'hm. so do you#want to keep trying other things' and like yeah what else can i do? therapy didnt do anything for this specific issue and the tagesklinik#lady didnt really seem to get my issue (well her suggestions for like therapy groups or whatever were more about socialising or whatever#like ??? girl that's really not the main problem here lmao but she also did have a point about how i would have to actually go there every#day etc but like#what else am i supposed to do#hi i am always tired and sometimes struggle to even get out of bed and thats why i worry about getting a job or something bc it could become#too much or whatever but like unfortunately thats kind of a requirement for everything lmao#when psychiatrist asks what i want/expect or whatever i am internally like 'a magic pill that just fixes everything and makes me a normal#functional human being' but like that's just not A Thing (tm)#so. like. what else am i supposed to do.#i don't want to be like this forever#idk how to tag lmai#using stuff like#tw suicidality#tw suicidal#tw suicidal ideation#just feels so over the top and like i dont have the right to use them lol
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so often i'll get that sudden and wonderful urge to make comics and stories of my OCs that I can actually show people but then just as quickly that urge is dashed by various foolish reasons, and one of the most foolish of those reasons is i get. scared. about committing to stylistic choices in a webcomic or illustration
WHICH is foolish BECAUSE
you can just. change them
really gotta stop thinking about branding and shit. some people are good with that but it always just paralyzes me LOL especially because when i think about all the comics and fiction and all that i like you can see signs of stylistic choices and characterizations shifting from the original vision at the start to how it ended up because things EVOLVE that is a Normal Aspect of storytelling IT TRULY is a foolish thing to get scared by orz
#like i get so worked up about like. what if the beginning isnt as polished as the end WHICH doesnt matter#i love so many decade old webcomics that started as pencil on paper and shifted into whatever formats and styles etc#you can do anything you want forever. you dont have to decide on the perfect style right away#you can just make whatever and its probably fine LOL#i like to write stories with my ocs but they are. written by very dysgraphic hand so theyre not readable#but someday.... someday i will work up the nerve....maybe clean up and post some....maybe draw some out as shitty comics...i can do anythin
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I 🩷 FIGURING THINGS OUT
#YAY#finished the chapter AND kind of realised how the rest of the fic will play out as well lessfuckinGO#<- guy who is surely going to have some sort of epic self-doubt episode within the next 48 hrs#was kind of overthinking it (who is surprised..) like oh but more stuff should probably happen first it probably needs bigger build up etc#but then its like. as always. i can do whatever i want forever actually! yay<3#and most of its pretty much written already too god i love you val-from-may you did all the heavy lifting jfdvnc
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The more I see people trying to argue that the Zonai are actually the original founders of Hyrule, the more I wish TOTK never existed. Or the "oh the other games (especially OOT) are just false retellings of the "original history" which was Zonai." I genuinely can't imagine being so damn invested in the underdeveloped goat people you would rather retroactively turn your other game experiences into lies.
#I can't be the only person who thinks this line of logic is stupid#1. Nintendo doesn't care that much. They told you where BOTW was on the timeline and it's just “the end.”#2. The new games are not for the old fans. There's references! But for the love of god#It's literally a whole new audience. BOTW brought in a whole new audience#You can do whatever you want forever etc etc.#But man the more I see people praise them the more I hate the Zonai.#Also I'd like to point out that if you really wanted to place them at the beginning of the timeline#Give me a goddamn workable explanation for why the Triforce is never mentioned. Cause that was a big thing in every game before BOTW.#loz#totk#oot
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keep thinking about writing a gomens fic in disco elysium style simply because it would be fun
#.txt#my brain keeps going nooo it would be cringe!!! as if that matters. you can do whatever you want forever etc#anyway. the agonies
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and whats with everything being about dogs now i like dogs and all but you guys know there are other animals you can compare yourself to right
#“transexual dog freak” what if you were like the mighty pheasant#idk dont take this seriously you can do whatever you want forever etc#miles says something
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#hmmm if i ever feel like full force swinging a bat at a hornests nest i'll make a post about how#about at least 80% of b*ldurs gate 3 discourse could be avoided if we all just recognized that its an rpg where the choices you make#actively shape and change the companion characters. like its an important mechanic#and also there is just so much writing and optional scenes that require different circumstances to even trigger in the first place#so everyones playthrough is different; no one in their average experience will have seen everything#meaning that everyones version of the characters is gonna be different#and while there definitely is a core personality and established backstory for the characters#arguing; discoursing and nitpicking about the small nuances and details in characterization is a largely fruitless and joyless endeavour#like whatever let ppl portray the characters based on their own experience with the game; we're all here to have fun so on and so on#like i love reading different peoples interpretations of the characters even if i disagree and think completely differently#i think its healthy to have a variety of takes and to then find and engage with the characterizations that you personally vibe with#(for the record: i dont mean like discussions abt wyll and how ppl in fndom treat poc and female characters; those are obviously important)#but yea i dont feel like arguing so tag rambling it is#this isnt about anything specific or prompted by anything or anyone btw#these are just my general thoughts based on more or less passively vibing in the fanbase#please dont come for me. you can do whatever you want forever etc etc peace and love
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does anyone know where/if i land on the whole “romance averse -> indifferent -> favorable” thing if i really enjoy fictional romance but any real person being involved, not just me, makes me feel uncomfortable. like is that a thing or is that just me being miserable
#like it’s the thing where.#like. i feel bad but one of my irl friends talks about her boyfriend a lot and every time im like oh my god can we PLEASEEE NOT#or like. what’s making me ask is realizing that it’s like#that exact feeling is what also makes me feel viscerally uncomfortable w x readers or self ship stuff#and i feel bad because obviously there’s nothing wrong with them you can do whatever you want forever etc#but it just. ughhhh makes me feel so weird#like it’s almost like a. ‘you guys actually want this? you wouldn’t feel trapped and miserable?’ feeling#but idk. i think because i don’t feel this way about romance as a concept just with irl stuff that it’s probably just. idk#me being miserable about other people being happy or some shit#txt
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Cannot find my older post about it (tbh I didn't try very hard) but honestly I am so tired of people trying to pretend like there's any sort of consistency to "cis women getting a nose job is evil and NOT feminist. However all transsexual surgery is Holy Holy Holy". It's truly not surprising how often people end up reblogging from like, actual tradcaths about "modern women ruining their natural feminine beauty" or whatever. I've said this all before so I don't wanna repeat myself but obviously this does not mean "you cannot critique what drives people (cis or trans) to get 'plastic surgery'" or "women's choices exist in a vacuum" (although I would roll back some of the extreme performative hatred for women who make The Bad Not Feminist Choices), but it DOES mean "stop pretending like there's any sort of actual distinction between Cis Plastic Surgery (bad) and Trans 'Gender-Affirming' Surgery (good) that does not fully rely on the medicalization of being transgender" and it ALSO means "stop pretending to care about bodily autonomy when what you really mean is 'people can do things with their bodies I think are cool and good, but not things that I don't like. Those things should literally be banned, that's how we will save women'"
#i've Definitely said this before but bodily autonomy is not just the tumblr leftist transSEXual commune smoking and getting abortions or w/e#it's also all the things you don't like. it's also all the things you think are frivolous. it's also all the things you think are harmful#idk toooo many terfs have come into my notes to tell me that transgender surgery is equivalent to eating disorders#or 'transracial' plastic surgery or Literal Self-Mutilation or whatever that i'm done pretending#i'm not going to do the Noooo it's different! this is Medically Necessary surgery to treat the mental illness that makes me trans <3#thing i'm Done. there is no definitive line between 'cosmetic surgery' and 'gender-affirming surgery'#and if it's either have both or have neither i think it's pretty obvious which one we should choose#open mick night#gender#idk you familiarize yourself with enough anti-trans anti-drug anti-kink and etc talking points and all this starts to#leave a bad taste in your mouth lol#when i say you can do WHATEVER you want forever i do mean it. even if the things are harmful or politically reductive or whatever#you can Leftist Critique it but you cannot even for one second start to fall into the 'and this is why women should Not Be Allowed To-' tra#bc as always. what's ur reasoning? you find it morally wrong? what other medical procedures do people find morally wrong? regarding women?
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moments like this when im really glad im a sad little cynic who always considers the worst possible outcome and never lets herself truly get comfortable and trust the good things in her life to stay there and builds her life around trying to soften the blows of the eventual disappointments just waiting around the corner lol never leaving my edgy teenager era peace and love
#i mean if the alternative is whatever the fuck is going on with my best friend rn then hooooo boy#cancelling therapy immediately i never want to change i wanna keep my trust issues forever and ever if its gonna save me from THIS#is he a dick? kinda. yeah. and a coward because if dude was sure he didnt want it since AUGUST and didnt have the guts to end it till now#actually he didnt end it. she was the one who finally snapped. but we seriously fought twice before because she just woudlnt listen#when i said that girl this isnt gonna work and you trust him too much and you're attachment styles are incompatible as hell#your*#but nvm. the least you could do when a 7 years younger girl who's clearly obsessed with you is breaking up with you#cause she just cant take it anymore. and you can see she's still in love with you because you've been lying to her for half a year.#imo the least you could do at that point is just. dont tell her that jfc. just say you're sorry it didnt work out etc etc#dont fucking tell her you stopped being in love with her in fucking august#and just 'didnt know how to end it' and lied when she asked if everything's alright#like my god. yes ig this would never have happened if she hadn't trusted him so completely and expected love to fix her whole life#but jesus dude. she's not even 23 she has a right to be naive. you're almost 30. you DONT get to be a man child anymore#christ. okay.#anyway i wish i could help her but telling her to 'trust less' and 'never truly rely on other people' sounds horrible and cringe and edgy af#but i genuinely dont have any other advice#like babygirl im sorry but your bestie is a piece of human garbage and she's doing the best she can but her best is Not Much alas
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i do not think irony is the right word however it is a bit funny silly haha that i am textings #1 hater forever <- wont ask people to talk on the phone
#it is funny i am laughing about this like genuinely#i ghink the only person i actively reguarly do is ares#listen#iyam just. a tiny bit scared to ask people. unfortuately shy and whatever#you get hit with the 'why do you ALWAYS want to be on the phone its so annoying' once. sticks with you forever.#i am just less afraid of annoying ares that is all. everyone else yeah SORRY </3#i know its like a skill issue on my end and like people can say no etc etc#however. logical brain does not always listen.
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