#you can be squicked/grossed out but... yeah

[orokukarai]

"can we all agree leo//nardo didn't really have feelings for ka//rai"

no

[slugass]

for the love of god why is the “war flashbacks” meme still a fucking thing to this day

(because people thrive on stereotypes about serious mental illnesses)

[psyscha]

.

[olderthannetfic]

its kinda hilarious to be honest that saying "because of the rampant bigotry in harry potter, and because of j k rowling's extremely pubic behavior, and the fact that she spends any money she gets from harry potter, which includes library purchases, official merch, etc, on material harm, i can not think of the fans as safe people to interact with" is something thats a controversial opinion.

its not even a "this thing is gross, evil, and should not exist" thing its a "you realize she uses any money she gets from this, which she will continue to make tons of money from this as long as it remains culturally relavent, to actually harm a marginalized minority she has decided to hold a personal vendetta against until the end of time".

if she were dead and the money wasn't going to hurting a group of people who can't actually defend themselves against a whole entire billionaire, i don't think the people squicked out by harry potter fans would care so much.

and the people squicked out haven't actually put out calls to harass them or anything, more just saying things like "i'm going to block you for my own safety, because you're not safe to me"

they aren't pulling anti shit. they're calling the fandom a personal red flag, who they choose to avoid.

pretty telling to be honest, that the reaction to that one account going "yeah no." in regards to not judging harry potter fans got so many people angry at them.

reminds me of why i choose to stay anonymous in fandom spaces.

oh no. someone is uncomfortable your personal comfort media written by a bigot who uses her money to make a very vulnerable minority groups lives hell, and her rhetoric has actually caused deaths! better block the person and write a bunch of stuff talking about how thats anti behavior so i don't have to think about the fact that i help rowling maintain cultural relavence, and therefore help her earn money that she uses to hurt people!

pathetic

--

We've had this wank many a time.

Personally, I'm not sympathetic to the fact that it's people's comfort media or unique for them. That just ends up annoying me for how other fandoms could be bigger or more vibrant if some of those HP fans migrated.

However, the reason people are pushing back so much on my tumblr is that we talk a lot here about censorship and media and the bigger picture. JKR is a menace, but HP is so astronomically popular that the fanfic arm of its fandom is essentially meaningless to its overall cultural clout.

I think people should go stan some other author because we could make a book fandom happen and authors able to pay the rent if we cared to put our energy towards somebody smaller. I have this same objection to the forever fandom of SPN and all the people whining about but not leaving MCU fandom. To JKR, we're gnats, but our presence would actually make a difference in some smaller space.

But the kind of ask you've just sent only makes people less willing to let go of HP.

[shadowmaat]

weaponized labels

How, exactly, are Community Labels supposed to work here on the hellsite? And why, in fact, does adding a tag to something suddenly become a community label?

Seeing all the people getting disappeared off this site for unforgivable crimes like- *checks writing on hand*- being a transwoman is chilling and gross. Watching other blogs get nuked for having the "wrong" kind of content is also gross. And not being able to access someone's blog because it "may contain adult content" is absolutely infuriating.

When I reblog something and tag it as En Ess Eff Dubyou all I mean is exactly that: it isn't something safe to be caught looking at while at work. I am not trying to brand OP or the person I reblogged it from as obscene. I'm not trying to get anyone's blog shut down or censored. I'm just trying to pass along a warning to save people at work (or people squicked by sex/nudity) a bit of discomfort.

If someone wants to label their own blog as being "Mature Content" or whatever, that's their choice. But this system where other people can decide a blog is "naughty" is appalling. And it has very much been weaponized against certain groups; something made worse by the fact that tumblr staff not only allows it, but encourages it.*

Labels and tags are meant to be tools to help, not tools to attack and suppress. And yeah, I know there's not much to be done when the whole system is corrupt from the top down (looking at you, Mulletwig), but COME ON. Maybe it's time for another lawsuit or three, since hitting them in their pockets is the only thing they seem to feel.

-

*Look, staff. You can protest and handwring all you want about how you're Good People, Actually, and that it's just a few Bad Actors ruining things, but it's time to admit facts: Your whole system is designed to oppress and silence vulnerable minorities. Your CEO is a Redcap Trumpian who singled out a transwoman and tried to put her on blast. He accused her of lying, opened her up to even more hatred and violence than she was already receiving, and tried to act like diversity's champion while instead proving his own rampant transmisogyny,

The people working on your mod team have been consistently antiqueer for decades, and have used their hate to shut down any voices they find objectionable. It isn't a few "bad apples," it's the whole bunch. Or near enough not to make a difference. They also keep proving that, despite what the TOS would suggest, threats of rape, violence, and death are, in fact, allowed here. Hate groups are welcome here. Palestinians and their supporters, however, are not.

Frankly, Mulletwig isn't even the cause, he's just another symptom. This issue predates his tenure by a wide margin. He makes a convenient target, though. A good distraction. Oh, he definitely needs to be kicked out, but he isn't the only one who needs to go, is he?

[wc-confessions]

I want to preface this confession by saying very big age gaps are a major squick for me in shipping, but I *still* think the Warriors fandom can be a bit. Weird about them?

Like. I see so many things of ppl being like "UGH, [insert ship] is SO problematic bcus it has an ENORMOUS age gap and [older cat in relationship] is a TOTAL CREEP even if they pursued [younger cat in relationship] as an adult!!!"

And then I'm like "Wow rly? Sounds terrible! Just how big is this age gap?"

So I look it up. And then it's like. Twelve moons.

You folks realize that's... twelve *moons*, not years, right? This is a one year age gap, not twelve. A one year age gap is *nothing*

One could argue that it is a big age gap, or should be considered one (bcus the canon series doesn't care about age gaps at all lol) by the standards of Warriors society, bcus the commonly accepted average age of becoming a warrior is 12 moons, meaning that the younger cat would be born by the time the older cat would be considered an adult

Which, yeah, does sound a bit weird when you put it into that light. But if that's enough to consider the ship "problematic," you have an extremely limited pool of "good" ships, so limited to the point where it rly wouldn't make sense for the long run of the series

You're telling me that cats' only eligible partners are ones who are born within, like, less than six moons of them, if they wanna consistently stay in the same life stage? What are the odds of a good match happening within that pool? What if the uncommon situation of a cat being the only one in that age range occurs (ex: Birchpaw (Birchfall) in The New Prophecy), are they just supposed to never get a mate no matter how badly they may want to (if they don't want a mate, awesome, and a convenient coincidence, but if they do)? What if all the cats in that range just so happen to be somehow related?

The warrior cats, despite how anthropormorphized they are, still aren't humans, and mature at a different rate than humans, so one being an adult at the same time as one being a young child and then pursuing each other later in life, a year between them (WHEN THEY'RE BOTH CONSENTING ADULTS!!!), has a way different connotation than it does for humans, who would have to have an age gap of over eighteen years (in the US for me, age of consent may be different elsewhere) in order for that to be the case

I get being grossed out by age gaps, I am too, but I genuinely don't feel like an age gap of one year or so is anything to freak out over the way so many ppl do. If that's your limit then there's hardly a ship that's not "creepy" in terms of age gaps. If you're fine with that, whatever, but you might be surprised by what ships you may like that have an age gap of that size

For me, personally, an age gap bigger than roughly three years is when I start feeling squicked (in Warriors shipping specifically), but it varies from ship to ship, and ymmv of course (and of course this only applies if they pursued each other when they were both adults)

But point being I think the Warriors fandom should rethink what's considered a "big" age gap bcus no small amount of the ones I see accused of being that aren't that at all, not by my personal standards at least

.

[mod2amaryllis]

man invincible is so good.... i forgot how much the first season rocked me when it came out.

i really can't stand on screen violence, especially gore, it just squicks me out. so sometimes jose will scout shows for me beforehand and he's good at knowing if something will be too much. he watched the whole first season of invincible then came back to me like "listen. it'll be a lot for you to handle. but i still think you should watch it." he said the same thing about train to busan and fuck off was he right so i was like okaaaay just warn me when it's gonna get spaghetti saucy.

and like, yeah, jesus. it's so much. it's gross, it's crazy, the end of the first episode kept me up that night. and yet instantly, instantly!!! i could see what the show was going for. i could appreciate the intention and purpose and artistry behind the hyper violence. it's executed in such a good way that even little baby piss pants mod can enjoy it. the whole show is good in part because of the violence, not in spite of it, and i don't feel that way about very many shows.

i know this is the violence blood killing biting eating you website but I'm an outlier LOL so if you're a pussywillow like me, you should still watch it

[whumpshaped]

anon asked:

okay here comes an oddly specific whump scenario i like! i‘d love to see how you write it :)

whumpee struggles with some problems and tends to drown them out in alcohol. one day when they get home drunk in the middle of the night, their parents are waiting for them with a suitcase full of their stuff, giving it to whumpee and telling them that they are no longer welcome here. in their despair, whumpee calls the only very close friend they have (caretaker) for help. the problem is that whumpee is still very wasted and not making much sense. caretaker comes to pick them up and whumpee sobs into their shoulder. in the end whumpee comes to live at caretakers home <3

(not sure if it hits a squick for you as bad parents are involved in the beginning, if it does, feel totally free to either ignore this prompt or change it up. so that maybe whumpee gets thrown out of a group home or something)

---

tw bad parents, alcohol, addiction whump, emeto

"We have enough problems between the two of us. We don't need an alcoholic of a child on top of it."

Whumpee staggered along the sidewalk, trying to drag their suitcase with one hand while dialling their friend with the other. Their phone's screen was cracked in several places, and with how drunk they were, they could barely make out the names of the contacts.

"It's fucked up," they muttered. Their tears were falling freely, further obstructing their already swimming vision. "It's fucked up, they're my parents. What do you mean you don't need me? Did I ask to be fucked into the world? Fuck you. Fuck you."

They tripped and caught themself in the last moment, feeling almost grateful that at least they didn't concuss themself. They decided to sit down on the nearest bench while they made the call; Caretaker didn't need to hear them fall on their ass in their drunken stupor in real time.

The phone barely rang two times when their friend picked up. "Whumpee?" They already sounded concerned. Whumpee tried to recall how many times they'd cried wolf recently, but they couldn't even remember. "Everything okay?"

"I'm fine. Hey... Can I come over?"

"Yeah, of course. Are you crying? What's going on?"

Fuck. "No, I'm just... outside. It's cold. So I'm sniffling."

"Why are you outside at 2 am?"

"What's it to you?" they snapped. "I was just– I was taking a walk, and then I thought... I wanted somewhere warm..."

"How much did you drink? Where are you? I'll pick you up. Are you gonna be okay until I get there?"

"I'm not a child. I'm fine. I'm, uh..." Whumpee tried to make out the name of the street, but the letters danced and swirled and made their head hurt. "Fuck, you know where I am, I'm in that... that area with the, like... the park, and the school, and..."

"Gotcha. Don't move."

"Wait–"

"Hm?"

Whumpee swallowed. "Can you stay on the phone? I don't like this place. Just put me on speaker or something while you drive. Please?"

"What do you mean you don't like it? Whumpee, are you okay? Is someone bothering you?"

"I'm fine! I'm fine, there's no one here, I..." Their voice broke as they looked around the empty street, barely illuminated by a lamp way too far away. "I'm alone. I'm so alone. Can you hurry?"

"Two minutes, angel. Sit tight."

Whumpee couldn't remember what they talked about while they waited. At some point they stretched out on the bench and almost fell asleep, and they didn't even realise they were hearing Caretaker's voice both from the phone and from a few feet away. They barely reacted when their friend shook them by the shoulders.

"What's with the suitcase, Whumpee?" Caretaker asked, worried out of their mind. Whumpee couldn't understand why. They hated their parents anyway. "What did your parents do? Did you run away?"

"'m sleepy," they slurred, closing their eyes again. "Take m' home... please..."

"Alright, alright. Up we go."

The whole world tilted as Whumpee was pulled upright, and they immediately turned away and retched. "Ugh... Gross... Sorry..."

"Don't worry about it," Caretaker said gently. "Let's go home."

[secretsideblog1234]

I’m starting to admit to myself that a lot of my presence on tumblr and bdsmlr are a mild form of self sabotage - I feel like calling it self harm is far too extreme a description but it’s at least self punishment. Punishment for what? well tbh I think I figure out one of the things that makes the Asexual Guilt Complex go brrrrr in the way that it does for me. I find my identity in asexuality to be important, and it’s still true that I don’t experience sexual attraction, and the idea of sexual contact happening to me in Real Life grosses me out. But I do have a libido, enough that I can be distracted from the inherent grossity of sex enough to do fingering and hand jobs with my boyfriend. Enough that looking at some types of porn can be a turn on. But that about as far as that takes me. dating an allosexual person when you’re ace already comes with the guilt built in, even when your partner is understanding. My boyfriend says that sex is fun but not a huge priority for him, but I know that our extremely mild sexual contact pales to his previous relationships. I know that he’s the one who initiates between us, and I know that he could have more fun if I wasn’t asexual. But there’s something about feeling arousal that makes me feel even more guilty. Like I can be sexual enough to do a tiiiny built of sexual contact but not much. And I’m not physically aroused by an attraction to my boyfriend (or anyone) but I’m aroused by porn? It feels more useless and misleading of me that if I had no sex drive at all

so I think that’s why I tried to seek out porn that really makes me uncomfortable - part punishment for liking porn on the first place (like hey you shouldn’t be allowed to just be enjoying the porn, you have to feel bad about it while you do it, so the porn itself should squick you out) and part the idea of being punished sexually myself for not being “useful enough”. And part the idea that some fucked up men would actually get off even more to my genuine dislike of sex irl, so that could make my useless state of being useful to someone. Because I don’t think I could change who I am enough to be useful without being forced, but I still have some hatred for myself about it. So yeah. I’ve given myself a complex where I want to feel bad because then I’ll be serving some purpose. Which is fucked lol. anyways as always you can take this as an invitation to treat me like you secretly want to treat women but are too afraid you’ll get caught or banned for it.

[yeetus-feetus]

look, I don't like pussy.

Unless the person with pussy is domming me. Because tbh, I'm not into pussy; it's scary and kinda gross and I wouldn't know what to do with it -even though I have one :/ )

Pussy on its own isn't hot and I don't like actually like it. At all. What is hot is when I'm forced to eat it out anyways because my Dom told me to and I really really really wanna be good boy. Please call me a good boy.

I'll do just about anything for praise, if I'm being honest.

And you know now that I'm thinking about it? I don't like dick either. I just like the feeling of being made to choke on it anyways.

I don't wanna see your cock dude that's fucking gross, but I'd let you make me take it anyways.

Idk, bodies in general are really off-putting. Bodies are weird and all the parts everyone else seems so into just really squicks me and grosses me out. I don't like sex because of the parts involved, I like it because of the feelings involved. If that makes any sense at all?

So I guess when people ask: "do you find men and women sexually attractive?" In regards to my sexuality, the real answer is actually no.

I like anyone who can Dom me, regardless of what parts they have because I'm not particularly interested in anything physically, I'm attracted to the energy you can put out. I'm attracted to the way you'd talk, the way you'd make me feel, the mental and emotional aspects of the act.

So yeah, I don't like pussy. And I don't like dick. And I'm probably not attracted to your body at all. But I do like being put in my place, I like being good, I like being told what to do, and I like being used.

and I feel like I'm the only one who feels this way. And like I can't say it out loud without being misunderstood. And I can't find a general word to describe it to make it easier for people to understand.

I really like sex, but I'm not physically attracted to the body. It's weird :/

[neutrallyobsessed]

If you don't mind my asking, what is it about the enemies to lovers trope (Or people who barely tolerate each other, ala Ema and Klavier, becoming closer) that sets you off?

Well you see, enemies to lovers is not just a romance trope, but a supertrope composed of smaller tropes, character dynamics and such. all of them that I absolutely hate. like I can tolarate the individual tropes to an extent, depending on excecution and relevance to the plot/themes but I CANNOT and WILL NOT tolerate all those things at once!!

Because I avoid E2L as much as possible, I went places where its fans explain why they like it and as I read I was all the time like nope, I don't like this, don't like this at all so here's the list of me explaining why I don't like the tropes that compose this particular dynamic.

I hate that it's a long process slow burn. I dont have the patience, I read <5k words one shot smut fics primarily. If it's a show that ship teases protag/antag, then everything else better be fucking perfect or I'll drop it as soon as shit gets annoying. This usually doesn't happen (because I avoid shows with this trope and won't watch it if I know beforehand it'll have it), so it's just a matter of avoiding the fans which is no problem at all.

I don't like when characters that don't get along are forced to interact and it's treated as ship tease. The characters aren't having a "funny banter", they are mocking each other, at least that's how I see it. They are suffering with each others presence, they are making comments with the explicit purpose of hurting each other and I don't enjoy that.

Whatever romance "blooms" out of it just feels out of character, like the plot is forcing them togheter and it doesn't feel natural. Yes, even if it is well written and was meant to end like that since the thought appeared in the authors mind. You've presented them to me as enemies, nothing will change my mind.

I've read something about the sexual tension and it severely squicked me out. Sexual tension between characters that like each other? Beautiful, perfect, immaculate, my eyes and tits are paying attention. Sexual tension between characters that don't like each other? No, gross, ughhh, disgraceful, disgusting, despicable, I cover my eyes and my chest is now concave.

I hate character development and changing sides. I hate realizing of mistakes and humbling arrogants so much. but there is nothing that I despise the most than redemption arcs. No becoming good, only becoming bad here!!

Like I said, I can tolerate any of the previous points in small doses, if it's good for the plot and if it's not romance. Enemies to Lovers is all 5 points at once and meant to be romance.

I've read that see us at our worst and fall in love anyway phrase so much and it's always so funny. That's a FRIEND. a FRIEND will see you at your worst and love you anyway because that's what FRIENDS do. Nothing more frustrating than an enemy who doesn't take advantage of the protag's dire situation, yeah yeah something about honor, whatever, it's still frustrating as fuck yo!!!

I agree that love and hate are two sides of the same coin but guess what smartass, two sides of the same coin can never see each other. Love can be about protecting each other's back but it's also about meeting face to face and that can't happen between two sides of a same coin. Draw lines in front of the faces and keep them going, you'll never see them cross paths or becoming one. Good analogy for the Enemies to Lover appeal, good analogy for me to explain why I don't find it appealling

But what I truly dislike the most, what always drives me away from this trope is its past. When they finally become lovers, they'll look back to where it all began and they'll find nothing but fights, conflict, bickering, getting on each other's nerves, wishing them the worse... the very base of the relationship is hate, and no matter how good the rest of the foundations are, it will never erase that it all started with hate. Sooner or later the difference that kept them apart will rear their ugly heads again to create conflict and chaos. If they hated each other once, it'll happen again.

And I don't like break-ups either. If I wanna see incompatible people get togheter to waste their time with the wrong person and have the relationship crash and burn then I'll just go experience Real Life. My Imagination can cover my desire for characters perfect for each other getting and being togheter forever.

Yeah yeah, in the world of fiction one can also make an E2L that ends all cute and fluffy and conflict-less but refer above about the unplausibility of it all, that it doesn't change that it all started with hate, my anal attitude about canon compliancy and that if, let's say, Ema finds Klavier's personality annoying I'm not going to fucking change Klavier's personality to fit Ema or viceversa, I'll ship him Trucy instead, who doesn't find his personality annoying but charming and attractive! Because it makes fucking sense

There are very few things that can break my suspension of disbilief. The people who barely tolerate each other becoming closer thing is definitely one of them. I just cannot find any sense on the Whys or Hows would that happen :///

I get that the F2L pining can be grating but at least they enjoy each other's company, whatever they find annoying they either solve it or don't actually find it annoying at all, and it's all nice and chill, which is what I prefer. You know what's fucking grating?? Spending time with a person you don't like and/or find annoying goddammit

Now if you read all of this and thought something along the lines of "but that's what makes it good!" to that I say, yes but not exactly, because yes, those can be the elements that make a GOOD E2L, but it's not what it makes it a good trope in general, it's neutral, it makes it good TO YOU who likes it but NOT TO ME who doesn't like it! None of these tropes appeal to me, I will not argue further, do not interact to change my mind, you won't, let this be a safe space for E2L bashing and F2L praising...

Welp, that was upsetting to think about, time to think of a boy friend and a girl friend becoming boyfriend and girlfriend to be less upset

[unlockthestars]

I've seen some discourse in a few different places recently, and it's been on my mind a lot. Setting boundaries for yourself is healthy and good, and expressing those boundaries is essential for making sure you have a space that is safe for you. We can't dictate what other people do, but we can express our boundaries in a healthy way. But if your boundaries cross someone else's, you can't expect them to give up their boundaries for you. You have to do some self-policing and look out for yourself, especially on a platform that allows you to block tags you don't want to see.

Asking someone to tag something so you can block it is a healthy way of enforcing your boundaries. Expecting other people to cater to your boundaries on their blog is not.

For example, though I haven't posted a lot on this blog, on one of my old blogs, I had a muse who was very into knives and bl.oodplay. I made sure to tag both of those things because not everyone wants to see that, and I recognized that.

For me, I have that I don't like eye squick in my rules, and I request that people tag images, especially. I have all sorts of synonyms for eye squick listed as tags I don't want to see because that is a way for ME to look out for my own boundaries. I'm not going around to everyone going "You can't write eye squick because it grosses me out," especially when sometimes in a fight-heavy series, people might have injuries to eyes or hands (which is another one of my things, though it's a lot less).

It's honestly kind of the same for s.mut. I am never going to say that everyone has to write smut; not everyone wants to! Some people aren't comfortable, some people have trauma, and some people just flat out don't want to. And any and all of those reasons are perfectly fine, valid reasons! No one has to explain their reason for wanting or not wanting to write something.

I have discovered, though, that writing s.mut has actually been very healing for me. I've been through a lot of different types of traumas, and have felt so ashamed for so long of basically ever even thinking about s.ex, that being comfortable enough to write it has actively been helping me heal some of that trauma. Because that embarrassment and shame followed me everywhere, and allowing myself the permission, the freedom to write characters that are so much more comfortable with themselves has helped me in a way I didn't know was possible.

And maybe this is too much information, but writing is amazing. It can help you heal parts of yourself that you've been struggling with for a really long time, it can help you discover parts of yourself that you didn't know existed or get more in touch with parts of you that you've known for a while. It can help you channel emotions that you have trouble dealing with, help express those emotions and feelings in a healthy way. It can do so much.

So yeah, long story short: look out for your own boundaries, curate your own experiences. And while you should definitely respect other people's boundaries, don't try to force your views onto them. This is a collaborative hobby, and if we all look out for ourselves and offer one another mutual respect and understanding, it'll be even better.

And if you ever need anything of mine tagged, just shoot me a message or an ask, even on anon if you're not comfortable! and I'll make sure to tag that for you. But I'm also going to continue writing the things that I want to in my little corner of this space.

[missbaphomet]

Hi baph. This might be a weird question but you're smart and I trust your judgment. Would it be a squick or a trigger if the subject in question made someone nauseated, especially to the point of vomit? Or something that made you so uncomfortable you physically squirm and feel distressed? Strange question I know but yeah

That's a squick! Squick and trigger are different emotional responses. Squick is defined as intense disgust, whereas a trigger is a distress response.

For example, if a child fell off their bike and scraped their knee, the blood might gross some people out, but if you were to watch a child be hit by a car you might develop triggers related to that event because it was traumatic.

However there can be some overlap. Let's say you once ate some bad chicken and got really bad food poisoning, so now whenever you eat chicken you feel sick. I would liken this scenario more to a trigger than a squick because it's a distress response from your body because it made the connection that chicken makes you sick and thus it rejects it.

I think a good question to ask to tell the difference is "is this gross or otherwise unappealing to me, or is this causing a trauma response?"

[himbosuplex]

I don't like to wade into fandom discourse and at the risk of upsetting any of my followers, if I do, I'm sorry, but I have to say my piece:

I deliberately abstain from involving myself in "pro" vs "anti" 99% of the time, but it really bothers me how I've watched the definition of just a regular shipper become "pro-shipper" and then further be deliberately skewed by folks in real time. Like, listen, I'm in my late 30s, I come from a time where shit like Wincest was just kind of a joke and people who didn't like it ignored it, if you get squicked you don't look. Nowadays people treat that sort of thing as being as bad as real-life murder. Nowadays people act like two *fictional* stepsiblings who weren't raised together falling in love is equivalent to real world incest. Do I like Wincest? No. Do I like step-sibling love stories? No, not really. Do I think either warrants peoples lives being ruined or enduring rampant harassment? Absolutely NOT.

The worst part being is that any time anyone speaks up about this shit, people will crawl out of the woodwork to say "so then you're okay with (real life) pedophilia?" And like... to quote the classic tweet... "No b*tch. Dats a whole new sentence. Wtf is you talking bout?"

Like nowhere else but Tumblr would I be called a "groomer apologist" because I ship two consenting FICTIONAL, NOT REAL adults that just happen to have an age gap. Or a "literal serial killer" because I enjoy horror stuff. Someone once called me a predator because I drew queer smut of adult Digimon because "its a kids show" even though I make deliberately clear to tag and label it and note that my work is not appropriate for nor meant for consumption by minors. Like how fucked up is that? To be an actual real survivor of sexual assault and then be called a predator because you drew Etemon with a dick once?

I don't think pro-shipper is a term that can be salvaged, as it has gone too long being used incorrectly. Maybe it shouldn't be. Nor do I think just not being a cop about fiction should really need a label.

But I think at the very least people should understand that pro-shipper was never about being "pro adults with minors" or "problematic" or "pro [insert rancid thing here.]." It came from a time where ship wars were a regular occurrence, and folks were pushing back against people trying to force others to conform to their tastes instead of curating their own space. It was always about "live and let live", and you didn't HAVE to 'be okay' with gross ass stuff, lord knows I'm not, but you didn't have to see someone who wrote a fanfic and could honestly have some real trauma they are sorting out and equate them with real world predators who hurt real people.

Nowadays, people acting like this in fandom is just so normalized and it genuinely terrifies me in this current fiction climate. In the modern era of the increasing pushes for censorship in fiction and book banning that is a deliberate move by conservatives to make people complacent when they continue to ban books for being too queer. You never have to be "okay" with people writing things that gross you out, or make you uncomfortable, but you can block them and continue on. You don't need to be a cop about it. Curate and block what you can, and if anything, encourage people to responsibly tag their media so it can be more easily avoided and encourage spaces to offer the tools to do such things.

So yeah, there's my thoughts. I'll probably regret posting this, but hey, these are my opinions, and I think I'm allowed to have them.

Uh- are you aware of the meaning of proship?

Proship has never meant anything except a combination of three ideas:

Ship and let ship (your ships don't harm me and vice-versa) and YKINMK (your kink is not my kink, and that's okay; my kink stories don't harm you and vice-versa)

Harassment over fiction is not acceptable

Censorship of fiction is not acceptable either

Any other definitions are made by antis, not proshippers, and are an attempt at revisionism to justify harassment based on false claims.

[thecastlesystem]

OSDDID terms: a completely subjective rating list by solace

based on this post by @jaybird3756. this is not objective by any means, just personal opinion on what we like to be called. if you love a term we don't like or vice versa, that's completely ok. this is just for fun :)

individual

alters - 7/10. a little clinical but accurate. points taken off because it feels like i'm armchair diagnosing myself when i say it (<-- has been diagnosed for years)

parts - 10/10. we love this one. integrated into the english language enough that it doesn't call attention to it, but also nonspecific enough that it can mean whatever each part wants it to mean. part of a person? part of a system? part of a family? all valid!!! emphasises that we're all in this together, which helps with system unity. can also cover any alter from the most elaborated to the most fragmented. cannot say enough good things about parts language!

headmates, brain friends, other 'quirky' names along those lines - 2/10. idk why it just squicks me out. something about it being so obviously a term that was made up specifically to talk about this experience, which feels othering to me.

others - 9/10. if we can't use parts, we're using this.

voices - either 1/10 or 8/10 depending on context. if it's anyone talking about it in a serious way, ew. if it's someone talking about their own system in a lighthearted manner, it's fun and i like it.

insiders - 4/10. very confusing, do you mean only ish alters? or any alter that isn't the host? it kind of reinforces the idea that only the host is 'real' to me. however, it's not something that makes me feel gross so it's getting a higher score than some others.

people - 5/10. fine i guess. not super accurate in our case, we're heavily fragmented and most of us don't have the emotional range to be considered a fully fleshed out person, but a couple of us like it.

any word referring to family members, friends, or coworkers. - 7/10. discreet, which i like. kind of a cool code if people know what you're talking about. points taken off because i can't tell whether people are talking about their outer life or inner life.

[legal-sounding words] (eg: delegates, jury members) - 8/10. we don't really remember to use it but very fun.

system members - 5/10. accurate, but a bit boring and clunky.

comrades - 8/10 cool and commie.

mes - 5/10. alright i guess. our younger parts use it sometimes.

collective

system (as in 'the system is saying this') - 10/10. the classic.

collective - 9/10. we don't use this personally but i wouldn't think anything of it if we were referred to as one.

constellation - 7/10. cute!! we don't use it but it's cool.

[a name for a group of people] (eg: the kids) - 10/10 if it's accurate, 4/10 if it isn't. one part calls us all children even though he's including the adults in the system and it's a little frustrating.

[a name for a group of animals] (eg: pack) - 2/10. gives me the ick. maybe it's just that i was dehumanised as a kid but please don't call us this.

the [blank] system - 6/10. a bit clunky.

^ shortened to just [blank] (so for us, castle) - 10/10. we like this one a lot. gets rid of the clunkiness but retains the ability to distinguish the whole system from each individual alter.

[a collective human name] (so for us, alex) - 7/10. wish we had chosen a better collective name but it works so it's fine. problems come in when the name is also the name of an alter, or people assume it's the name of an alter when it isn't.

chat - 10/10. no notes, funny as hell.

the counsel - 9/10. yeah man that's what it's like.

identity terms

system (as in 'i am a system') - 8/10. sure.

multiple - 5/10. we don't really experience our did as being a group of people in one body, so it's not really accurate to our experience.

plural - 2/10. ^^ plus it feels icky idk.

dissociative - 10/10. accurate, doesn't sensationalise or put undue focus on the alters aspect of osddid.

person first language (as in 'i have did/osdd') - 10/10. this is one of the only things where we prefer person first language.

possessed - 1/10. we believed this for years and it's not helpful at all. don't ever call us this.

[dittolicous]

Hello, different anon; I come from the perspective of always seeing the kinky and fetish fic as the canary in the coal mine. I’ve seen the rise and fall of many online platforms, and usually onces the canary dies, it becomes open season on whoever else doesn’t reach the agreed stranded. Which usually results is sweeping bans that hurt allot of folks who aren’t even involved.

I completely understand folks not wanting to engage and interact with that kind of fic or that side of fandom, which is why having tags/filters/blacklist to help manage one’s internet experience is so important.

Content warnings are clearly stated at the start is the most important thing.

Yeah, I can definitely see that perspective too. It's kinda similar to the whole dividing the LGBTQA+ idea, in a way, where a they try to divide us and use in-fighting to weaken us. And then the leopards eat our faces too.

Course thats a huge over-simplication (and again works on good faith that no ones trying to groom or genuinely support IRL taboos). And in defense, proper tagging can be a real issue, with like Tumblr/Twitter being HORRID about showing you things you don't wanna see, and certain topics can intersect in very troubling ways (ex. how do you avoid creating fan content for sibling characters without incest fans projecting on to it, and handling feeling gross that someone saw incest in a thing you made? what if you based it off your own sibling interaction, how would that make you feel? this can leave one not wanting to create for that anymore from squick. but if you make a point of them not interacting with it/creating a dni, you may get mocked or hated on as well, with people doing so anyhow, making a *point* to do so, or what if you interact with incest piece without knowing, and if you find out... how do you feel? art is subjective but you made personal art and the interpretation directly contradicts your point. how do you interact going forward? of course, this can happen anyways for many topics, with varying levels of general ok-ness). There's Dead Dove and sometimes theres just improperly tagged squick/triggers flooding a tag because it's almost considered the 'norm' (I see so much untagged incest in the Batfam tag and I've raged on that in the past). AO3 is getting better, but filtering out things you don't wanna see can still be tricky (I have never found a way to fully filter out highschool aus - its not a squick, I just find them boring XD but things can get tagged so differently! I have the same struggle with ABO, it seems to sneak by all the time).

(I don't use many other sites so I'm not sure how tagging systems work on like... pintrist or tiktok. Is DeviantArt still a thing? And YouTube tagging is useless, you search something and the third video down and on are all like completely irrelevant)

Hence why it's a complicated thing for me. Cuz I can see points from both sides and I don't want my general disgust with certain issues to lead me to make a rash or uniformed decision.

(this is a problem I have in everyday life, sometimes, where I become indecisive because I keep trying to see other points of view, and end up losing MY pov... I spent so much of my childhood be a little brat, I may of overcorrected)