#you can also mute uhhh
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"I'll be your mirror" by Velvet Underground in Crowley's playlist -> I'm dead, discorporated, gone, reduced to a million of weeping atoms I'm-
Also the idea of Crowley diving into his Bentley after the "naked man friend" moment and just blasting Queen's "I'm in love with my car" to """get back""" at Azira while screaming inside (&outside) <- Real.
#the cloud can speak oh boi#Good Omens#<- gonna start tagging so others can mute if I become even more insufferable (it will happen <3)#Was I expecting either I'll Be Your Mirror or Pale Blue Eyes for his playlist? Yeah. Was I hoping for After Hours to be there also? y ea h;#Lowkey glad Old Fashioned Loverboy isnt on there because that could've actually been the final nail in my coffin after what we got lately a#TAKE ME TO CHURCH THOUGH EXCUSE ME-#did AO3's spectre posses the one managing the GO PV account??? UHH???#Would've expected Unknown or From Eden more but my god they just went DIRECT WITH IT#CROWLEY DARLING YOU GONNA BURN STOP-#Am I really unwell over a playlist? Oh my god what is GO doing to me-#also the other songs I uhhh- still gotta listen to them 👉👈 I'm not as cultured I'm afraid A-#Now I shall go culture myself in music whoop-
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engenes hate moas who hate every enhatxt interaction and feel so high and mighty when they dont make a fuss about the company making them interact but now they hate everything about &team being associated w enha like girll you sound like those moas you hate so much THIS IS RIDICULOUSSS
#a/#PLEASE USE YOUR BRAINN JUST THIS ONCE ofc this is gonna happen#using old groups to promote newly debuted groups is nothing new at all and this isnt even rhat bad#like some of u guys can say ‘no hate to &t tho :)’ but god you guys are nasty 😭😭😭#also the k hate is so stupid too i’ve seen some engenes wanting to mute his name but being unable to like auaiwujwhejdhdkd#why are u guys acting loke that when enha are obsessed w him. please know your boundaries#being mad when people are annoyed their faves arr friends w enha but then this happens too like ouuhhhh you guys are not any different.#it still irks me that that tweet about ni-ki calling k durint his bday live got ratioed so bad like GEEZ!!!!!#anyway. thats all#its one thing to dislike iland k but projecting like this is a bir uhhh 🤷♀️ but hey thayt’s just me!
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reader is down bad for matt, like she blushes, giggles, goes mute whenever he's around and he kinda enjoys it and one day he finally asks her to go an a date and it ends super fluffy
She’s Got It Bad
Pairing: Matt Sturniolo X Female Reader
Synopsis: Y/N was out of her mind in love with Matt, but she was shy. Which left her in awkward silent situations until one day Matt puts his foot down! 🌷
Warnings⚠️: None?? Writing kind of sucks also sorry if there’s grammatical errors I never proof read till two days later after I post lolll😭
Song for imagine: This Is How It Feels- D4vd, Laufey
So this is how it feels
To fall in love with you
To always think of you
To always dreams of you
You know when you’re reading or watching a romance book or movie, and one of those super cheesy slow mo scenes happen? Where an 80s love song is queued and the two love interests stare at each other while their hair oh so dainty blows in the wind? And you’re curling your toes as your heart beats for the next scene to happen? Just thinking “I need more! Give me more!” And then it goes back to reality and they end up walking right past one another….
And it wraps you into this hour and a half or 230 page book/movie about the girl wanting the guy….but the guy not really wanting her or simply seeing her as a sister or painfully shoving her in the friend zone? And you’re itching for more. Tired of this back and forth of who will get one another first?
And if you said yes to any of those questions then you are sure looking at my life right now…stuck painfully stuck in the friend zone. Mainly because I put myself there. Let's face it, I'm deeply afraid of rejection. Why ruin something that is virtually perfect.
I had it bad for Matt and I’m not so sure he felt the same way, but I’d never in a million years ever jump at that. I’d rather rip my ears off and tape them to the concrete and then run them over consistently for an hour… okay a bit graphic and a bit over the top but you get the point. He’s off limits and I’ve got it bad for him…
Most of our interactions consisted of short conversations, me blushing like an idiot and even sometimes going silent..offering a nod here and there. It’s even gotten to the point of having to leave the hangout because I was so nervous around him. I mean what if I said something that he found cringey? What if I embarrassed myself which I tend to do a lot might I add? Or even worse…what if he didn’t find me funny?
All these terrible instances bounced off my brain like a bullet ricocheting off of metal walls. As I sat chewing my lip, suddenly my thoughts were interrupted
“Helloooooo” I heard loudly from the other end of the phone call
Blinking out of my trance I soon realized I had been on the phone.
“I’m sorry Nick I got side tracked” I replied gripping the phone again
“Yeah I can tell you went rogue for like 3 minutes there, did you even hear what I asked you?” He asked laughing
“Uhhh yeah and I think you should go with the yellow shirt” I replied praying I wasn’t so far off from what he was talking about
“That was like 10 minutes ago, I asked are you coming or what?” He said huffing
“I’m sorry? Coming? Where?” I asked again as I furrowed my eyebrows
“This is why I don’t call you, you have the attention span of a fly” he said laughing which caused me to laugh
“I’m sorryyyy I was thinking about something” I replied to him
“Aren’t you always… I was asking if you were coming over tonight for movie night?” He said shuffling around
“Ohhh duhh of course I never miss Saturday nights with you” I said getting up to pack my overnight back
“Even though Matt and Chris are joining us this time?” He asked
This is where I hadn’t been listening previously and I almost choked on my saliva trying to form a proper answer.
“Uh.. *ahem* yes of course they can join us” I replied trying to seem chill
“Wow sooo nonchalant about that” he stated sarcastically
“Oh will you shut up” I replied stuffing my duffle bag
Nick opened his mouth to speak but on the other end it sounded like someone walked in his room
“Matt get the fuck out I’m on the phone” Nick said which made me laugh a bit
“Who are you talking to?” I heard Matt ask his brother
“Your girlfriend now fuck off” he said almost hissing at Matt
“NICK STOP” I squeaked over the phone
“I don’t have a girlfriend you sicko” Matt stated sounding annoyed…. I looked up at my imaginary camera (hmm how do I take that response) I thought.
Shaking that feeling off I returned to the call
“Okayyy bye nickkkk see you in a bit” I replied rushing him off the phone
Hanging up the call I sighed deeply… if I wasn’t already nervous to possibly run into Matt then oh boy was I in for a treat
Usually, Saturday nights were for Nick and I and I rarely ever ran into Matt or Chris. Usually it was Chris and him and I had a cool bond. We’d stop to hug and chat for a bit before Chris left to go out. And if I ever ran into Matt it was him leaving with Chris which prompted me to wave slightly and avoid all hugs. Rambling on about Nick needing me for something upstairs each time and not even giving them the chance to respond.
I usually shut my eyes and shook my head when I turned away from them and even muttered a few unkind words about myself to myself….
But tonight…tonight Matt was joining us which meant I couldn’t be awkward around him or else Nick would for sure point it out.
I had gotten to their house with dinner for all of us which we landed on chilis…. Good thing I was 21 I needed a to go drink…preferably strong!
Sitting in their living room as we all began to eat, Nick scrolled through Max as we sat on the floor with our food on the coffee table.
“We should watch Silver Linings Playbook I heard it was good” I said looking over at the tv as Nick had just passed the movie
“I’m down” Chris said shrugging his shoulders
Nick and I usually watched action movies where we’d see a bunch of sweaty hot men fighting bad guys. And most of those movies we’d just yell out if we’d smash the guys or not. I don’t know that Matt and Chris would want to take part in that so a rom-com was for the win!
Max was playing a few ads before the movie and as I was sipping my margarita in a styrofoam to go cup (how niche) Matt had called my name
Looking over at him I raised my eyebrows at him.
“Do you like rom-coms?” He asked me
I felt my ears getting hot and my face too….good thing I’m drinking and I can just blame it on the alcohol.
“I do, I love them actually” I replied nodding at him
“I love them too” he said smiling at me as he ate a fry
“Nice” I said nodding my head and looking over at the tv…why the fuck were their ads still playing? Squinting I turned back around to face him
“Uhh what’s your favorite?” I asked him clearing my throat
“I’d have to say 10 things I hate about you” he replied wiping his hands
“SHUT UP! Me too” I replied getting really excited and loud (blaming it on the alcohol once again)
“No way” he replied laughing
“No! like I swear! I have all the romance movies I’ve ever seen ranked in my notes app and 10 things I hate about you is number one, look see” I replied rambling as I opened up my app and showed him
His brows raised…an impressed look might I add
“Wow Y/N didn’t know you were such a hopeless romantic” he said winning at me
This made my heart flutter and my voice disappear? Sinking into my skin I nodded at him before turning to watch the tv
Throughout the whole movie I kept catching Matt looking at me but he’d look away quickly. This made my skin crawl in a good way though
The movie finished and I found myself emotional. I mean it wasn’t a sad movie but rather beautiful. Nick and Chris had gone to lay on the couch at some point in the movie.
So to no surprise Matt and I turned to find them fast asleep. Shaking our heads we cleaned up the living room and headed to the kitchen to place everything in the trash.
The hallway light illuminating the kitchen as I washed my hands
“I almost feel like Silver Linings Playbook is my number one rom-com” Matt and I both stated at the same time
Laughing I shut the water off and turned towards him
“I guess we really are similar” I said to him as I crossed my arms over my chest
“I suppose so, but I wouldn’t know you’re always running away from me” he said quietly
“Am not!” I replied standing up straight
“You’re always running away from me as fast as possible, you don’t hate me do you” he stated as he wiped down the table
“No” I replied watching his every move
“Then why do you run away? Do I stink?” He asked laughing
“No! You just happen to catch me when I’m busy” I say lying through my teeth
“Right…I suppose so, I do know how to get you at the right time though” he stated throwing the paper out
“Do you?” I asked cocking an eyebrow
“Yeah…when I take you on a date and have all your attention so we can really get to know each other”he says
“Well we’re friends so I do know you” I reply rolling my eyes
“No…know me on a different level that’s not…friends” he says smiling at me sweetly
“Not friends?” Was all I could mutter
“Just say yes to the date you loser” he replied shaking his head
“Yes..sorry yes I will go on a date with you” I replied shaking my head and giggling
“You’ve ever seen Notting Hill?” He suddenly asks me
“I actually haven’t” I stated
“Want to watch it?” He asked me
“But Chris and Nick are sleeping” I replied pointing over my shoulder
“You miss queues don’t you?” He asked cocking an eyebrow
“They don’t call me a ditz for nothing” I replied jokingly
He looked at me with adoration in his eyes for a moment before opening his mouth
“I mean with me…just me” he replied with soft eyes
“Oh....yeah” I replied breathlessly as I shook my head…am I that fucking stupid? I thought to myself
We shut off the tv and the hallway light. Matt led me to his room as I followed behind. It felt so foreign being in a room with a new undertone to it….more than friends
“You can sit closer I won’t bite” he says as he looks over at me
“Right, sorry” I say sitting closer to Matt against the headboard
The air felt awkward as we watched the movie, but Matt slid his arm over my shoulder and pulled me in
“I’m not a stranger” he replied as he snuggled me closer against him
Smiling against him I melted into his touch as we fell asleep to a romance movie. I guess being shy does work out in the end and I’ve always had it bad for Matt but after today? You’re for sure thinking
She’s got it bad!
The End
I wasn’t sure how to end this…it’s so HARD TO END A STORY WTFFFF. Anywho we’re almost at 2,600 followers🥹🥹. Yall I could cry this means so much to me I remember when I had hit 100 followers and I never thought I’d make it this far. I’m so eternally grateful for you all😩🖤🖤. I know I don’t update three times a day everyday like I used to, but I’m so glad yall are sticking around till this day when I post once to twice a week every two weeks. I don’t deserve you, thank yall so much🥹💕💕💕. Stay tuned for more work baes
-J💅🏽
#sturniolo triplets#sturniolo x reader#sturniolo fanfic#sturniolo triplets imagines#matt sturniolo fanfic#matt sturniolo x reader#matt sturniolo imagines#matthew sturniolo imagines#matthew sturniolo x reader
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The Hufflepuff Code
James Potter x gn!Hufflepuff!reader (no use of y/n)
Word count: 3.6k
CW: Use and discussion of weed, mentions of alcohol, light kissing, reader under the influence of weed, mentions of food and eating
Summary: You have a secret.... Or, at least, your Hogwarts house, Hufflepuff, does, and you can't tell your Gryffindor boyfriend James. Only problem is, your boyfriend is very charming and has an inclination for mischief. What could go wrong?
A/n: Hiiiii, I hope you enjoy! This work is vaguely based off the Harry Potter discourse on TikTok a few months ago, about what parties would be like in each Hogwarts house! Please don't take offense if you're a Gryffindor lol, I love them. Also, until I find a fancast for James Potter that I like (I imagine him as desi), I will be using ATJ.
Going to Hogwarts requires a lot of studying….something you are trying to do but failing, because a pair of hazel eyes can’t help but bore into your face. You double down into your books to avoid your boyfriend’s gaze, but his intensity only increases. He shifts from mute staring to pokes and silent whispers of your name.
Finally, you snap your head up and look at him, “what?!” You whisper.
“Just missed you s’all,” James says sheepishly.
Your heart can’t help but melt a little, “sweetheart, I’m right here.”
“Yeah but you’re studying and not paying attention to me.” He whines.
“Well, I did invite you to the library to study, not snog or make small-talk.”
James eyes light up, “oh that sounds like so much more fun. We should do that instead.”
“Sorry Jamie, as much as I’d love to, I can’t. Gotta study.”
He huffs and rolls his eyes dramatically, “fine. But I expect your full, undivided attention later.”
You cringe a little and guiltily avoid his sweet, beautiful face. “I-I’m sorry I can’t hang out later.”
“Baby,” he says rather loudly.
You shush him a little and grab his hands in apology, “I’m sorry, I made plans earlier this week.”
The brunette pouts at you and shakes his head, his mop of curls falling into his eyes as he does so, “with who?”
“My friends-“
“Friends? What friends?!” Your boyfriends protests.
You glare at him a little.
“Sorry, sorry,” he whispers, “I just mean, what friends could you possibly be hanging out with instead of me? I mean, I’m the bestest friend.”
You kiss one of his hands intertwined with yours, “I know, sweetheart, you are. But I need a little non-boyfriend-friend-time sometimes, you know?”
“Well-uh I can pretend to not be your boyfriend for a night,” he disagrees, “I can gossip and, do whatever your friends do.”
You chuckle a little, “I know you can, and honestly, I’m sure they will be happy to have you in the future. But that’s not the type of hangout we’re having.”
“Okay, so then what are you doing?”
“Burying bodies, holding seances, the likes,” you tease, trying to avoid a serious answer.
James just glares at you, not impressed by your jokes.
“Sweetheart, don’t be mad,” you plead, bringing out your puppy dog eyes, “promise I’ll make it up to you.”
“Yeah, yeah,” he answers, dismissively waving his hand. “That I’m not concerned about anymore. What I really wanna know is what you’re getting up to tonight,” he says, quirking an eyebrow.
You’re pretty sure his eyes peer into your soul, trying to unleash all your secrets. It makes you shiver and look down at your paper.
“Oh you know, typical Hufflepuff things.”
“Hmmm?” He asks, shifting closer to you. “Like what?”
“Uhhh eating food, potting plants, being loyal.” You mumble out.
He gets closer and lifts your chin to make you look at him. James, the bastard, knows the effect he has on you. Teasing you with your closeness, knowing his cologne drives you crazy, his eyes make you melt, and his lips leave you defenseless. He licks his lip a little and you slightly groan.
“So you’d rather pot plants than spend time with me?” James asks quietly.
Words leave you at this moment and you only stutter a little. You try to lean in for a kiss, the tension unbearable, but he pulls back. “Nuh-uh.”
“You don’t get a kiss for lying.”
You whine a little. “I’m not lying, I’m just concealing some of the truth.”
“Why, love? Do you not trust me?”
Your face softens, noticing the slight sadness in his voice. You grab his face and brush his dark curls away from his eyes.
“No Jamie. It’s not that, it’s just- well it really is sort of a Hufflepuff thing. A code of conduct, you know?”
He furrows his brows, “uhh, not really, no.”
“Well, I’m sure Gryffindor has some traditions, right?”
James shakes his head, “well it’s sorta the same thing for Hufflepuff, just more secret.”
“But I won’t tell anyone” your boyfriend says softly, kissing your hand, “promise.”
“I know, sweetheart. It’s not that I can’t tell you, it’s well, I can’t tell-“ you hesitate.
“Who?”
“Gryffindors,” you say, quietly.
Confusion clouds his pretty face, “what d’you mean you can’t tell Gryffindors?”
You cringe and pull away, “I’ve said too much already, sweetheart. Sorry, house loyalty.”
He scoffs, “what about loyalty to me?”
“Don’t do that,” you tsk, “it’s really not that serious. Just silly house traditions, a little bit of rivalry, yeah?”
“Well then if it’s not that serious, just tell me,” he counters.
You groan. He’s really not gonna give this up.
“Fine,” you mumble. “Come on, let’s go somewhere more private.”
You gather your books and motion for him to follow. He stands up obediently and packs up his things before taking yours from you. As you walk down the halls, you find an empty classroom and push the two of you inside.
“You know if you wanted to get me alone, you could’ve just asked,” he teases.
You roll your eyes and slap his shoulder playfully, “pervert…just wanting to get in my pants.”
“Can’t help it when you’re so beautiful,” he mumbles, pressing a kiss to your lips.
You hum in content and lean into the kiss, holding onto his arms gently.
“Could keep you here all night,” he sighs against your lips, as his warm hands wrap around your waist.
You huff in disappointment and pull away a little, “you know you can’t Jamie baby.”
“Worth a shot.” He sits down on a desk and spreads his legs a little, letting you stand between them, “so if I can’t convince you to skip this tradition, then tell me what it is at least. And why can’t Gryffindors know?”
You sigh a little, “okay, don’t get mad, because I didn’t decide this, remember, it’s tradition.”
James pauses and then shakes his head for you to continue.
“So, basically, Hufflepuff, Slytherin, and Ravenclaw have this arrangement to have three annual parties. One hosted by Hufflepuff, one by Slytherin, and one by Ravenclaw.”
“And why not Gryffindors?”
You wrinkle your nose in awkwardness, “well…cause the other houses don’t really like Gryffindor all that much.” Before James can protest you add, “it’s not that we don’t like Gryffindors at all, it’s just, we don’t like when you’re all together. On your own or in small groups you’re fine. But in large party settings you guys get loud, and stupid, and well…..annoying. And, the other three houses got sick of it, so they decided to start hosting a few no-Gryffindor-allowed parties every year.”
James simply stares at you in silence. “And this has been going on for how long?”
“Uh, 20 years at least,” you say.
The boy’s mouth drops, “and no Gryffindor has ever found out?!”
“Not really, no. We keep it super secret.”
James scoffs, “I mean, well that’s sort of ridiculous don’t you think? Hosting secret parties just to keep us out?”
“Look,” you say gently, grabbing his knee, “I didn’t say I agree or disagree. It’s just tradition. And well, I’m not gonna be the one to break it.”
“So what do you even do at these ‘parties’?” he asks with a huff.
“Well Ravenclaw hosts the first, in the Fall, a sort of poker, gambling game night, but with lots of booze. Very classy actually, typical Ravenclaw. And Slytherin hosts next, right before Christmas. It’s a sort of Christmas, bougie, boozie party. Very swanky and jazzy. And Hufflepuff, well, that’s the crowd favorite. Held in second term.”
The brunette raises his eyebrows in curiosity.
“Basically we get a shit load of weed from our secret plant stash, and everyone gets high and eats food. We like, raid the kitchens before hand.”
“WHAT?!” James almost shouts.
You put your hand over his mouth to quiet him. “Shhh, people could hear.”
He takes your hand off. “Hufflepuff has a secret drug stash?! And you hide it from us?!”
“I mean, why do you think we’re so happy all the time?” you say, laughing a little.
“So you-but.”
Your boyfriend’s brain seems to malfunction, “damn, Hufflepuffs are druggies? My partner is a druggie?”
You let out a laugh, “I wouldn’t say druggie…just…plant-positive.”
“So…there. That’s my secret. But you can’t tell anyone. I have my dignity to uphold.” You warn.
“Can I at least come?!”
“No! I’m not even supposed to tell you. Let alone bring you!”
“But-“
“No. Im sorry James, I don’t make the rules.”
“But I wanna get high…and see you high.”
“Well, another time.”
Your tone was final, but James did not take it as such. Instead, he became more determined to find his way in to this mysterious party.
*****
After making James promise to not impose, you left him behind in the classroom with a kiss and a lot of regret. On one hand, you had just broken so many Hufflepuff rules… if anyone were to find out, you’d be shunned for sure. On the other hand, you also felt incredibly guilty for leaving James out. Your sweet boy with his soft eyes and kind smile… but also his loud personality and pranks. You knew he’d never mean any harm, but the likes of him at this sort of party would not be welcome. He’s the definition of Gryffindor. And of course you love him for it, but you’re not sure your peers would.
Back in your dorm, you throw your books down on your desk and then plop onto your bed.
“Long day?” Your friend Emmeline asks.
You groan, “terribly.”
“Good thing we have a chill night ahead of us,” she reminds you, plopping down next to you on your bed.
“Touché Emmy. I’m very ready for an edible and a bag of flaming hot Cheetos.”
“Mhmmm, and those chocolate chip cookies from the kitchens?”
We both sigh in content.
I can feel her staring at me. “Something’s wrong…”
You turn on your side and look at her, “yeah… I just, well, told James I couldn’t hang with him tonight because I had plans and I feel sorta bad… being all secretive you know? We don’t keep secrets.”
She hums in acknowledgement, “hmmm yeah, I get that. But I mean, it’s not like a bad secret y’know? Just tradition.”
“Which is what I told him but still..”
“You didn’t tell him, did you?” She asks, slight mortification on her face.
“No, course not,” you lie, turning back on your back. “Hufflepuff code n’all. Just hard having a Gryffindor boyfriend.”
“Yeah, babe, I know. But you only gotta lie a few times a year, he’ll never know the difference, yeah?”
“Yeah, you’re right. I’m overthinking this, I know.”
“Indeed,” the brunette answers, shoving your shoulders lightly. “Now come on, lighten up, we’ve got a fun night ahead of us.”
You smile and sit up, “yes you’re right.”
“Now, I know the vibe is obviously cozy, but I still wanna look cute y’know? What should I wear?”
You hop up and walk over to her closet. “Oh babe, you gotta do your yellow Hufflepuff sweatshirt. With your brown curls and pale skin, you look like freaking Belle from that muggle movie.”
She gasps, “a whole princess?! Wow, I’m flattered. And what about pants?”
“Leggings maybe? Something that makes your ass look good?”
“Take me to dinner first!” She squeals.
You laugh a little and wink, “sorry baby can’t help it.”
Her shoulder length curls bounce a little as she shakes her head at you.
You go into your own trunk as you strip off your school uniform and instead opt for black pajama pants and one of James’ t-shirts that has some muggle band on it. It still smells faintly of him and your heart aches a little at leaving him behind. You brush it off, though, when your other two roommates come in the room, grocery bags in hand.
“We’ve got the goods!” Amelia and Trinity cheer.
“My hot Cheetos?” You ask.
“Course,” Trinity answers, rolling their brown eyes, “this isn’t our first rodeo.”
You squeal and peck them on the cheek before giving Amelia a hug too.
“You guys are my favorite, you know that?”
“Better be,” Amelia huffs. “Otherwise we’d have words.”
You all excitedly chatter as you go through the groceries and get ready for the party.
Trinity ends up in Ravenclaw blue, which looks fantastic against their dark brown skin.
“Trying to impress anyone?” Emmy asks, quirking an eyebrow.
“Hmmm, maybe a certain Pandora Lovegood?” Amelia quips.
Trinity tries to hide a smile but can’t, “duh! She’s just so cute, especially when she’s high.”
“And Amelia? Trying to impress anyone?” You ask, scanning her dark gray sweater and black leggings.
“Nope!” She says, popping the p, “only here for me, myself, and I.”
You force everyone to gather on your bed and hold up your disposable camera, “smile everyone!”
You take a few photos, cute and silly, and then wander down to the common space.
The common room remains mostly the same, besides a few added bean bags and blankets for comfort.
A low, quiet base thumps in the background as people from all three houses lounge around. Amos Diggory, a seventh year, sits at the contraband table.
“What can I do for you folks tonight?” He asks.
Emmeline asks for a blunt, Trinity and I take an edible and Amelia shakes her head, motioning to her pen instead. We crash on the carpet, waiting for the weed to kick in. Everyone around us is laughing, chatting, and snacking, at different levels of gone.
When Pandora walks in, Trinity waves and motions her over. She’s followed by a few of her friends, including Regulus, Rosier, and Crouch.
“Baby Black?!” You cheer.
He rolls his eyes as he sits down next to you. “I thought I told you not to call me that?”
You shrug your shoulders and pat his cheek, “yeah, but I chose to ignore you. I love how cute you get when you pout.”
He can’t help but blush a little and he softens. You have a way with that boy, and he with you. Surprisingly, you are very close friends.
You turn and nod in acknowledgment to the other two, “Rosier, Junior. How’s it going?”
“Better once I’m high” Barty answers. He turns to his friends, “what do you want?”
They tell him and he stalks over, giving Amos a glare while he’s at it.
“Always the delight he is,” Amelia teases. Her eyes are a little heavy, telling me the pen is already working.
“So, Black? What brooding have you been up to recently?” Emmeline jokes.
You swat her arm and can’t help but giggle, maybe a little too hard. “Be nice.”
“Oh you know, just planning your demise” he answers with a smirk.
“I’m the subject of your brooding?” Emmy fake swoons, “I feel honored.”
You laugh again and hug Regulus around the neck, “am I ever the subject of your broodings?”
He looks at you with a small smile, “course. I think about killing you once a week.”
You gasp in fake offense and stick out your tongue. Barty, who’s back with the weed, hands Regulus a blunt. He takes it between his fingers and inhales. Then he looks at you and rolls his eyes again.
*****
James Potter is usually good at keeping promises. However, he’s even better at making mischief. So despite his promise to you to not come to the party, he finds himself a little while later outside the Hufflepuff dorms, albeit hidden under the invisibility cloak. From outside, the hallway is quiet. Any passerby would be oblivious to the party going on within- must be a silencing charm. Unsure how to get into the common room, realizing you hadn’t told him before, he waits outside for someone to, unknowingly, open it for him. He, luckily, doesn’t have to wait long, as two unsuspecting Slytherins stroll past him and up to the barrels sitting outside. In quick succession one pulls out their wand and quickly taps it across the barrels. The brown barrels jump apart, revealing a door. As the two walk in, James closely follows behind, assuring he doesn’t remain locked out.
Though you briefly explained the parties to James, his imagination far underestimated the reality. When you said all three houses went to these parties, you weren’t kidding. The place was packed, with every 4th year up from all three houses lounging around the badger den. The room was thick with smoke and reeked of marijuana. Students were everywhere, standing, lounging, laughing, eating, and even sleeping. Music played in the background, but no one was dancing, seemingly too high to really notice it. He scanned the room and found you in the thick of it all, seated on the carpet by the fireplace. You were with your dorm mates, Emmeline Vance, Amelia Bones, and Trinity Taylor, and also a few Slytherins. He recognized them all actually, one being Sirius’ little brother, who he knew you were actually good friends with. Also Rosier and Crouch, who he wasn’t as fond of, and Pandora, the one Ravenclaw he sorta knew.
Still hidden under his cloak, he weaves through the crowd, careful not to bump into anyone, afraid of getting caught. He throws himself into a corner by the fireplace, listening in on your conversation.
“But Reggie, you’d look so cute with dyed hair!”
The Black boy scoffs at you, “yeah right. What should I go for, bright pink?!”
Your eyes light up as you giggle, “yes! And I’d start calling you baby…. pink? Instead of baby black, cuz you know-“ you giggle again, “your hair would be pink!”
Your words sort of slur together, not that you realize it, and so Regulus only nods, himself also struggling to comprehend what’s happening.
“Wait, I think I have some dye, let me go get it!”
“Wait-“ Regulus calls out but you’ve already gotten up.
James’ heart jumps as you come closer to him, weaving through the crowd on the carpet…
*****
As you stumble towards the stairs of your dorm you freeze. You could’ve sworn you smelt... James’ cologne…..
You shift backwards a little and sniff again. Sure enough, his fancy cologne, one you love but always tease him about, permeates the air. Either you’re really high or….
You suddenly fling your hand outwards to the left. Though there is nothing next to you, you make hard contact with something in the air, and hear a small “oof” from next to you.
A chill runs down your spine and out of the corner of your mouth you mumble, “James. My. Room. Now.”
You don’t bother to hear an answer, knowing he’ll follow you like a lost puppy.
When you’re in your room you shut the door firmly behind you and whip around “James- what the hell.”
Your boyfriend appears before you, taking off the invisibility cloak sheepishly. “Hey, baby.”
“Don’t fucking hey baby me. What are you doing here?” You slur together.
“Uh, missed you?” He says hesitantly.
Your nose flares and you stalk towards him. “You. Fucking. Missed. Me?!” Each word is punctuated with a smack to his chest.
You don’t realize in your unsober state how hard you’re hitting him or how loud you’re talking. He tries to minimize his flinches as he grabs your hands and holds them together.
“Love I-“
“What? Wanted to risk me getting shunned?! Jamie I asked you not to come! I trusted you!!”
“I know lovie. I’m sorry, I just got jealous… and curious. It’s no excuse I know but…”
You huff and throw your head in your hands. It’s spinning for more than one reason, and the weed keeps you from thinking clearly.
“We’ll talk later. You, just stay here with your cloak, yeah?”
He sighs and nods.
His sad puppy dog eyes get to you and you soften a little, pressing a small kiss to his cheek.
You then walk towards the door and open it, only to find the whole of Hufflepuff standing outside your door, staring in shock.
“You, you broke tradition!” Amos Diggory yells, pointing at James.
“I- well- shit” you mutter.
“This is like, breaking the law,” another Hufflepuff argues.
You feel tears prick at your eyes, “I’m sorry guys I- uh.”
“Wait,” your boyfriend says.
Everyone goes quiet.
“It’s not their fault, honest.”
No one seems to believe him.
“Look, I got suspicious of what they’re up to, so I followed them, with my invisibility cloak on. Swear!” He even holds up the cloak, demonstrating its invisibility.
Everyone gasps, “no way, that’s fucking sick.”
“Please don’t punish them because I’m stupid and nosy! Please!” He pleads.
Diggory turns to the head prefects of the other two houses and quietly confer. After a few minutes of quiet whispers, Diggory turns back.
“Fine, fine, you’re off the hook,” he says to you.
“And as to you Potter, well, I guess you’re officially inducted into our little secret now. We can’t have you going around spilling. And I swear, if you tell any one of your little Gryffindor friends, all three houses will rain hell. Understood?”
Even you turn to James and raise your eyebrows. He really does feel a little threatened and nods. “Uh, yeah. Course.”
Diggory claps his hands together, “great! Well then, get Potter some weed.”
As everyone files out, James turns and looks at you nervously.
“Well?”
“You heard the man, let’s go get you some weed.”
“Okay, just- wait.” He grabs your wrist and pulls you flush into his chest.
He kisses you deeply, “love you, baby.”
“Love you too, sweetheart.”
#james potter x reader#james potter x you#james potter fanfiction#james potter fluff#james potter fic#marauders fanfiction#marauders era#the maruaders
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!!THIS IS NOT CALEB!!
This is my version of the FTF Grimwalker that got possessed by Belos and then was resurected on GrimIsles!
His name is Cheese! ...Bear with me here-
His grimwalker siblings let him to choose his own name, because they didn't want to force something so important onto him. Especially when this "newcomer" was lucky enough to not be named by Belos. So the freedom of choice felt pretty important to consider for his ability to built his own identity and carve his own destiny.
But.. Cheese was litteraly "born yesterday" and he didnt understand the language yet. At all. So, of course, when he started to learn some words, he chose to identify himself with something he really really likes. And.. this thing he related to happened to be a block of yellow dairy product with holes in it and a funny taste. He is too much of a cheese lover.
Later on he often "changed his name" from Cheese to Onion to Gerald to Boot to Nike... Uhhh..., it was difficult to say the least. But the name Cheese stuck with others, so now it is how he is called. Although many end up pronouncing it as "Chez", which is valid too.
As you can see on my art, Cheese doesn't have his legs rotting like the body in the s3 ep2. Thats because it was part of his "mortal wound". In otherwords, Chez wouldn't be able to live with parts damaged like that. Usually all that left after the person's "mortal wound" after the resurection in the temple is a small light scar. But, even if Cheese got his body fully in tact now, the bottom part of his body nonetheless seems to be paralised. Thats why he requires a wheelchair to move around the Isles. (I wont deny the possibility of him getting a jetpack or something like that so he could move thought the air on his "loyal carriage". Imagine that vine video but with Cheese. He would be very enthusiastic about creating and building shit like that.) Chez also happens to be mute due to his damaged throat and vocal chords also from Belos'es possession. Thats why he has that little oracle stone on his hair-clip that helps him speak his thoughts out loud! He wasn't always able to use it, so he was also taught how to use sign language. His siblings were glad to learn it along with Cheese so they could finally chat.
I was initially imagining Cheese to be enthusiastic about sports. Especially since the grimwalker body in FTF looked quite buff weirdly enough XD. But he slowly grows to be much more than "CHEESE IS SPEED". Perharps our discovery of him as a character reflects his own journey of getting to know himself. Chez came to be as a blank slate. I guess he is technocally the happiest grimwalker in this AU, since he never experience any kind of abuse and has a loving family that treats him with respect even if he doesn't understand everything yet.
It was my first time drawing a wheelchair I think. So I really heavily referenced just to get its structure right. Maybe when I draw Chez again I will decorate it to his liking. He would probably enjoy some stickers on it. Especially of space and ships. Or Cheese could have a Starwars (or however that franchise is called in TOH universe) merch on it! He likes spaces, because it is full of infinite possibilities.
Thank you, @crypticpara and @talisman975 for inspiration!
#ShuraBibertush#Bibertush_TOH#TOH#toh#the owl house#the owl house fanart#toh fan art#toh au#owl house au#the owl house au#Grimwalker_Island#grimwalker#grimwalker oc#toh grimwalker#toh grimwalker oc#golden guard#golden guard oc#toh golden guard oc#toh original character#the owl house original character#the owl house oc#owl house oc#toh oc#OC#original character#doodle#GrimwalkerIsland_Cheese#disabled#art#disabled character
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be my +1
synopsis: when streamer heeplays needs to find a plus one to go with him to the Streamer Awards, what does he do? he makes a google form of course! and what happens when up-and-coming streamer y/n jokingly fills out the form, catching heeseung's attention? stream starting soon: be my +1 !!!
lvl 5. - maidenless [smau + written 367 words]
========= stream starting soon =========
The bright gleam of the ring light blinds heeseung as his stream starts up. his light is on, mic is muted, and food is on its way as chat begins to flood onto his “starting soon” page. checking the countdown timer, he has two minutes all to himself before officially going live. heeseung smiles to himself as he watches chat talking amongst themselves.
otvfan07: hello !!!
🜲 nightwingsbooty: hi chat
yunjinlover: :wave:
pikachuus: hihi
looking at the countdown one last time, heeseung moves a strand of hair before the clock finally reaches zero. switching the scene on his stream deck, his face suddenly fills up his second monitor as he moves to unmute his mic. “yo, hi, welcome everyone!...hihi, oh what song is playing?, uhhh it is, ‘give me your forever’ by zack tabudlo…yea i like that song haha”
🜲 jayparks: w
shimkongzz: hee’s taste *chefs kiss*
lunelles: what’s the plan for today ?
“ah, ‘what’s the plan for today?’, well,” clapping his hands together, “today we are going to be playing a little bit of valo but we’re going to have our usual thirty minutes of just chatting first” as heeseung’s eyes scan through chat he notices a particular question, “‘did i see somi’s new tweet?’ mm not yet let me pull it up now…ah okay we can bring plus ones to the streamer awards...oh am i going to bring anyone? hmm i don’t know chat, we’ll see, we’ll see”
eumppappaz: BOOO THIS MEANS YOURE MAIDENLESS
02zlvr: hee confessing he’s single KEKW
kkurawons: BITCHLESS BEHAVIOR
“hey hey i could pull…it’s just no one has piqued my interest rn”
heyluv: I CAN BE YOUR DATE HEE
🜲 babyricky: you looking for a date ???
☑️💎ikeutv: ayo you looking for a date bbg ;)
mochimoshi: POG I could be your date
“woah woah woah idk guys, you really think you can handle all of this…” heeseung begins to regret everything as his chat is filled with nothing but silence in the form of three small dots, finally loosing his cool when all he can see is the flush emote times ten “haha anyways imma start warming up now, i just saw jake in chat, and i CANNOT let him rank higher than me”
extra:
previous ✿ masterlist ✿ next
note: writing the written part was so cringe inducing
also ! this is the flush emote
pairing: streamer!heeseung x fem!reader content/genre: strangers to lovers, college au, streamer au, fluff, crack, (potential) angst, smau warning(s): swearing, ignore timestamps taglist is still open !!!
©️ simplhee 2023
#enhypen imagines#enhypen reactions#enhypen scenarios#enhypen fluff#enhypen smau#enhypen social au#enhypen social media au#enhypen socmed au#heeseung imagines#heeseung scenarios#heeseung reactions#heeseung fluff#heeseung au#heeseung social media au#heeseung smau#heeseung x reader#enhypen x reader#bm+1#bm+1 thoughts#bm+1 updates
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hi im john! or zero. i'm a LEESBO and i draw stuff : also im multifandom and i switch interests almost monthly. if you follow me for one thing you might not get that.
i'm fifteen and from the southeast of asia. i can speak different languages but i only prefer being spoken to in english lol!
also we MIGHT be mutuals. this isn't my main blog and that was actually a mistake because i didn't know how to use tumblr by the time. if you see you're being followed by some user called epicflowpow then I guess we're mutuals :') that's my main blog that im inactive on! lol! it's hard to explain
byf:
i have bad memory don't expect me to remember anything personal like ur birthday,
i make sex jokes sometimes ok if ur not comfortable lmk and ill stop,
i post what i want, i might post blood, gore, etc. anything i post may be triggering, if you don't like it block me! the only form of censoring you'll get is the tags so get ready to mute a few (ex: cw blood, cw knife, cw suicide)
my social skills suck.. you can try to talk to me but i get very nervous when talking privately and i might say things i don't mean
i am sometimes rude but it's just for fun lol i don't actually mean it,
i don't reaalyyy use tonetags but ill use them when my wording starts to sound a little serious
uhhh i make homophobic jokes because it's FUNNY. im actually a person of the bacon community though so yeah.
i like to cuss my faves out. i will say very very mean stuff about them and I won't state whether it's positive or negative. if you don't like that then you should probably not read the tags sometimes
i ironically use emojis like 😂🥺🥹😜 etc
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dni: i don't have a dni because people are gonna interacr with me anyways. ill block whoever makes me feel uncomfortable and who not (pr/shipp*rs are not exceptions lol ALL will be blocked)
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also i do requests! here are like. rules for my requests n stuff:
i think im most likely to do EVERY request you guys give me, so go crazy! i just won't do it quickly. because im not an art machine
i do any reqs, but i will less likely do/will put for last the oc requests lol :)
okay when I said any reqs i lied: just don't request me taco x pickle loll it's for the sake of some of my mutuals :) i can still draw them hanging out but it won't be tagged as ship or implied ship
i also do any fandom but again i will less likely do fandoms im not in lol
uhh. if im uncomfortable with a ship in particular ill just ignore your req don't bother sending it again or im gonna give you a beating
complicated styled characters are ok but if you wanna give me a first good impression don't send them or you're literally breaking my fingers physically
also comics scare me if you request those too you're also breaking my fingers (it's not prohibited though you can send them but ill cry)
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tags
0 art: for my art
0 ask: for asks
0 req: art requests!
0 s req: things people draw for me :)
0 reblogs: for reblogs (best muted)
0 txt: me talking
0 talk: me talking w other ppl
0 fave: favourites/saving for later
0 other: other
#0 art#0 ask#0 req#0 reblog#0 txt#0 s req#0 other#pinned#for context: the bacon community is the LESBIAN community. i cant say bc my sister knows my tumblr#0 talk
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Hi there! Can i request Stellaron Hunters (Kafka, Silver Wolf, and Blade) x Neopolitan s/o from RWBY?
If you dont know who Neo is, She is a short mute gurl who can and will beat you up elegantly with her beautiful parasol like the QUEEN she is. She has powers to make illusions that is so real, it fools literally everyone and she has beautiful heterochromia eyes (different color eyes). Here are some vids that will show you how amazing she is:
https://youtu.be/nXdtjWZg4ms
https://youtu.be/b-3f2p53Bp0
https://youtu.be/catRiBUvj24
Uhhh so i might have gone on a bit off of a rant. Neo is my favourite character in RWBY and the only reason why i watch the show, so sorry for the rant. Hope you have a great day though!
- Flower Anon 🌸
-----♡
A/N: Hello, Flower Anon! I unfortunately can't look at the links for some reason, but I looked her up and she seems super cute! Thank you for the request!<33
Content: Fluff, established relationship, mentions of hsr typical violence/battle, sfw
Reader has no set pronouns!
((Not fully proofread))
-----♡
》Silverwolf
Silverwolf is impressed by everything about you, even if she comes off as disinterested at times. She therefore shows her affections for you, by either speaking for you when needed or spending most of her time with you. Your muteness is no issue for her, as she isn't too keen on talking herself most of the time.
She doesn't care for your looks much, but still finds you very cute. She especially likes your eyes, which she comments on often. Your height is also perfect for her, as she isn't very tall either and can steal kisses better this way.
Silverwolf loves watching you fight with your parasol. Your abilities surrounding it and your illusions always leave in her in a near trance. She's just so proud of having an s/o like you and feels flattered, when you protect her whilst she works.
-----♡
》Kafka
Kafka adores absolutely everything about you. She doesn't mind that you're mute and often helps you out by either talking to you or giving you a notebook to write on, so you can tell her things. She enjoys talking more anyways, so you listening to her intently is always great for her.
She finds how short you are super cute and often teases you for it. She also compliments your eyes alot and likes to therefore stare into them as much as she can. That usually turns into a friendly staring match, that she finds quite adorable.
Kafka also loves watching you on the battlefield. She finds your abilities beautiful and enjoys seeing you plow through your enemies with ease. She also likes playing around with your illusions, wondering just what else you could do with them.
-----♡
》Blade
He doesn't treat you any differently for your muteness and just somehow knows what you want to tell him at all times. He doesn't mind the silence anyways, as he is a man of few words and doesn't like talking much.
He never comments on your looks much either, but he secretly finds your height difference quite adorable. It takes alot in him to not just pat the top of your head all the time. And your eyes are also something he admittedly loved about you. The different colours fascinated him, making him wonder how they were even possible to exist.
He underestimated your skills on the battlefield at first, until he saw you truly fight. After that, he became even more impressed by you. He enjoys fighting alongside you and can admit to himself, that you're a good team together. But he'll still attempt to protect you anyways, even if you don't need it.
-----♡
A/N: I hope this was okay! Thank you again for the request, Flower Anon!<33
#honkai star rail fanfic#honkai star rail x reader#honkai star rail x you#honkai star rail#hsr x reader#hsr blade#hsr blade x reader#hsr kafka#hsr kafka x reader#hsr silver wolf#hsr silver wolf x reader#hsr
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Disharmonized Heaven basis if any of yall want,,, i want to draw more of this AU im just ironing out things....
Harmony (Tibby's Mom) is one of the main antagonists, but doesn't want to be / is doing what she believes is necessary (while also being in a type of delerium)
She is known for acting without thought, and harsh punishment/judgement (ex, my OC Lost Girl was banished)
^^^ neat detail about Harmony, she cries gold. A semblance of her true self leaking from the rare instances we see her emotion!!!
Heaven World is a broken place, and it is not what it used to be. The vibrance and rhythms have muted with time. (Broken Record is responsible)
Heaven World in this AU is a home to "idols", basically our Rhythm Game characters such as Wandering Samurai, Clappy Trio, Stomp Farmer, Pop Singer, Chorus Kids, etc.
HOWEVER: Mass duplicates like, the Hue Birds or Monkeys for ex: are magical entities who simply live in heaven world.
A lot of the Space Characters qualify as this too, but sometimes there's instances of an idol sprouting among them like, "Player" Space Kicker!
^^^ "Playa" SK is a bit of a people pleaser, and, occasionally runs errands for Harmony.
The Karate Family were the guardians of the world's flow meter back on earth.
Karate Joe was in line to be the next guardian, but Senior kept him in the dark and it made an attachment to this responsibility, outside of his father, difficult.
^^^ Senior actually, NEVER, told his children about Heaven World, either.
So you can imagine: The day he was murdered, and that treasure was stolen by Broken Record; Joe and Maccie sort of had their entire world caved in.
Joe became the idol to replace his father. All of a sudden, he has a murder mystery, and a quest to retrieve their family jewel thrown upon him. Informed he's some "god", that, what, did dad have powers? I have powers? I, have, to become the Karate Man???
And, who, all informs him of this? Why a wise little dog! Barista is not a resident of Heaven World, but sniffs around. He's a friend, of a friend, of a friend, here to help Joe, and fill him in.
Maccie feels lost and left out. (Especially bc, if you remember, she is Senior's golden child) so she doesn't like this talking dog trying to take her brother away very much.
^^^ and even more that she's "not special", and can't help. She eventually runs off on her own, and tries to find the flow meter herself. (AND actually is the one who gets closer, meeting Tap Girl who accompanies a fallen Tibby)
AND UHHH yeah this the bare bones basics. I have a lot of ideas and trying to figure out dynamics and roles amongst the cast in this context. Like \\\ Some characters are new idols (SK, Pop Singer), some are very old (Samurai, Stomp Farmer), and others are simply just guys hanging around!!!! (Barista, Space/Cosmic Dancers) and... waaaaa..... also RIP Senior and uhhgmmmm Goddess Divorce Yuri 😔
If you got this far uhh,,,, feel free to ask me anything / give ideas,,, aaa...
#disharmonized heaven au#rh hc#rhythm heaven#qlso i plan to do pkt for this au.. kinda like existential solidarity
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The loose stitches voiceboxes are infecting my brain. There is a massive breach of bodily autonomy, a forced on "cure" of being mute, all in the effort of enforcing a single method of communication
Thats why I hate the concept of a "common language" in fantasy stories- it implies that all these cultures and creatures just *happen* to speak a shared language. Like English is widely spoken but we don't fucking call it common. English only spread this far due to imperialism- so when I see one language being called common I wanna bite
Which is also why I like loose stitches take on it, there is one "common" language spoken but its not cause people just happen to speak it, its enforced- and its not just the spawnlings housed by the organisation who are forces into this, its the workers aswell- implying to me that this is enforced by some greater state
Thats not even getting into how these voiceboxes could be tamperd with, or even monitored- for all we know this voicebox could be keeping a record of what people are saying- but that's getting into conspiracy theory territory and implies that the state is more competent than it actually probably is
Tldr dotty is being gaslight into believing that these voiceboxes are just there to help and I'm getting so pissed on its behalf
HEHEEHEHEHEHEE <<33 im SOOO glad you've noticed this. when i first conceived of loose stitches i was like 14 and the world was supposed to kinda be utopian, i wanted it to be a story about being born into the best possible world that cares about you from day 1 and STILL not fitting in, and then y'know, finding your place in it or whatever.
but as i learned more about SOCIETIES and HISTORY and OPPRESSION i started picking at the threads of the world I built and realized there was a lot of room for discussions of other stuff that was important to me, like ableism, colonialism, and how my desire to find people "just like me" might be more counter productive and divisive than I'd originally thought.
under the cut for things that i don't consider spoilers but ARE world building facts that haven't been brought up in the comic yet, so if you dont wanna read that uhhh yea
funfact that im not sure i'll get around to addressing in canon but is relevant to you mentioning a "common" language: people spawn knowing an accumulation of various languages spoken near their spawn point, often times they lean heavily towards one language/culture or another. if someone spawned in an area an spoke a different language than the people who found them, or was more familiar with different customs, it was customary to just go "oh this one's not for us ok lets send them to the people nearby that they are clearly influenced by"
since spawnlings are basically this worlds children, it was seen as kind of EVIL to just... remove them from the culture they've been spawned into. that's basically like stealing a baby.
spawnlings speaking different languages doesn't happen nearly as much anymore as there are way fewer spoken languages now :)
it should also be noted that language in loose stitches is an expression of communication via magic. not everyone who can speak aloud has a functioning mouth and vice versa, so there aren't as many languages as there are in our world in the first place. regardless, there's way less of them now!
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Hi,
I remember your nosferatu thinblood, Lamb.
May I ask some questions on them, as the thinblood pregnancy is a rarely done topic?-
Do we know who the father is to the baby, did she get pregnant before or after the Embrace?
Is the child a dhamphir or just human? Do they know the name or gender?
I wonder if she will have to teach her child ASL as she's mostly mute herself. But still, this is really interesting. Also will they be raised by her? I just hope they can keep them out of the danse macabre.
Sorry for 20 questions and rambling on :)
Hey again! Thanks for the questions, I'm glad everyone else likes Lamb as much as I do!!
Parentage The father of her child is Jeff Solomon, a skilled occultist and former Tremere Ghoul - now liberated and working for Victor Collins as a respected retainer!
Jeff and Victor are both OCs belonging to @syntheticmortal! (you can see the only time I've drawn Jeff here in a wedding pic for Victor and Gloria 🥰 he's the white blond guy on the far right)
Jeff and Lamb uhhh conceived the child after she was Embraced and came out a Thinblood the freaks and were totally fucking shocked to discover that Lamb got pregnant as a result. Obviously this outcome is so rare that no one in the vicinity of the couple knew it was possible.
Jeff and Lamb are in a committed relationship and have plans to raise the child together after it's born! They have no idea what to expect from a child born from a Thinblood and a Ghoul but rest assured they'll be keeping their child away from the dangers of Kindred life as much as possible.
The Child's Nature The child will be born a dhamphir, for intents and purposes! The Nosferatu curse will not be present!
They know the child is male, and once he's born he'll be given the name of Jeff's grandfather and also Lamb will want to give him the middle name "Florent" as that is the name of the Elder in the Warren that took her in as a refugee when she fled execution. (Florent © @syntheticmortal)
ASL She definitely will be teaching her son ASL so they can communicate! Worth it to mention she won't be hiding her Nos Face from him either!
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Chapter 8: June - Part 4 [NSFW]
☾ Pairings ➼ Levi Ackerman x fem!mute!Reader (she/her pronouns), set in a modern semi-fictional world
☾ Summary ➼ Due to childhood trauma, you find yourself an adult without the ability to speak. After years of working on it, you have found ways to live without a voice. Now here in your late 20s, you are 5 months in getting used to a new town. On a fateful day in late November, you and your adopted sister visit a local bookstore-café, unaware of the friendships about to blossom. Throughout the months, one friendship in particular develops into something more.
☾ Content/Warnings ➼ fluff, slowburn, oblivious feelings, romance, angst, mention of minor character deaths, trauma, illness, adoption, mentions of fire, disabilities, alcohol use, very light nsfw mentions, references to child abuse, smoking and alcohol abuse mentions, domestic violence, light assault, uhhh- sex? idk how to tag this kind of stuff. SPEAKING OF...
☾ Author's note ➼ Hehe, hi! I bet y'all never thought you'd see this tag OR BANNER on here ever. Tbh, I thought I would never see this tag or banner on any of my writings. But uhhhh- here we are! If it isn't obvious, this is my first time EVER writing smut. I've never even written self-indulgent smut before because it is REALLY HARD FOR ME TO DO. That's mainly why this chapter took so long (I'M SORRY); I wanted to make sure it was perfect. If you're a minor and read the smut I will find you and cut you! Hehe. Anyways. Again, I am so sorry this chapter took so long!! I've hit quite a rut in my life and I'm just really glad to have gotten it done in the first place. Let me know what y'all think!! ALSO CAN Y'ALL BELIEVE THERE'S ONLY ONE MORE PART LEFT HOLD ME I'M CRYING
☾ Word Count ➼ ~10.9k
The visual of Levi’s bewilderment haunts you just as much as the feeling of his lips on yours does. You’re not sure why you thought kissing your friend would be a good idea at all. Regret gnaws at you as you find yourself in a vicious cycle of rumination.
But it wasn’t all regret, was it? You wanted to kiss him. And you liked it.
Maybe it wasn’t regret at all, actually. What you really felt in your core was disappointment. At yourself for not thinking before acting and at him for not responding the way you inwardly hoped he would. If Levi’s cold shoulder this morning wasn’t proof enough, you don’t know what was.
“Love?” Hange’s voice cuts through the white noise reverberating through your skull. Slowly, you turn to where your sister currently sits with light green paste smeared all over their face. You blink the glassiness away and raise an eyebrow at them – which is a little hard to do as you have the same paste smudged on your face that is in the process of drying.
“Were you listening at all?” Concerned eyes bore into yours. You’d say you were thankful for the green tea facial that covers the dark circles under your lashes, but you knew Hange had noticed the moment they laid eyes on you today. They click their tongue and sit upright in your direction.
“What’s going on in that head of yours?”
‘What do you mean?’
“You look like you didn’t sleep a wink last night and you have been out of it all day. What are you thinking about?”
‘It’s nothing. Just had trouble sleeping.’
“You’re only restless when you have something on your mind.”
You stick your bottom lip out. In truth, you really did want to talk about it, but you weren’t sure what you wanted to say. Hange wasn’t the type to let things go when it came to you though, especially when you’re distressed. You’d need to say something now whether you liked it or not.
‘I like Levi.’ You sign quickly, averting your gaze from the piercing light-brown eyed stare burning holes in your face. You sigh softly and tuck your chin in the white fluffy robe that wraps around your body, ignoring the fact that you’re wiping the face mask off into the fabric as you do. It takes them a moment to realize you’re not planning on saying anything else.
“And that’s upsetting?” They laugh and relax back into the plush cushions. “That’s nothing new. I’ve known for a long time.”
Your eyes cut over to Hange again at that, wide in shock.
‘You knew? How? Since when?’
“I know when someone’s smitten. And you my darling? You are smitten like a kitten.” They roll their head in your direction as they speak, eyes sparkling. “Probably since February.”
Was it that early?
‘Can you be specific?’ You feel your face heat up from under the thick mask.
“If only you had a mirror. You should see the way you look at Levi. It’s so obvious, even Nanaba picked up on it.” They smirk as they twist in your direction, resting their chin on a hand that sits propped up on the armrest. A wide smile carved up and into their eyes.
“What happened last night anyways that made you discover this known secret?” Hange already knew, they had to have. Their demeanor changed from worried to curious in the blink of an eye.
‘Nothing.’ You sit back in a huff, closing your eyes.
You hear Hange sigh softly but doesn’t press for the next half hour. Your body sinks deeper into the plush massage chair as your head sits back on the head rest. Off to the side, you hear the soft babbling of the fountain piece that pairs wells with the gentle spa music that floats from the ceiling speakers down to your ears. Your brain wanders and you feel the heaviness that comes with sleep about to settle in.
“Excuse me?” A sudden voice startles you. You pop an eye open to see a spa employee in mint robes standing in front of the chairs you and Hange were relaxing in. “It’s time to move on to the hot pools, are you both ready?”
“Oh yes!! I’ve been looking forward to this part.” Hange exclaims, practically throwing themselves out of the chair.
.
The steamy mineral water stings your skin upon first contact. It wasn't uncomfortably hot, but it was close. It takes you a few seconds to get used to it and before you know it, you’re sinking low until your nose is submerged. Only your eyes and up show, like a crocodile floating as it hunts. You had put your hair up so that it wouldn’t get wet, but a few loose strands decide they want to get wet anyways as they float around your face.
Your sister, on the other hand, does not take the gentle approach. Before you know it, they’re running down the ramp ass naked. They throw themselves into the water when they get deep enough, throwing water straight in your face. Luckily, the pools are slotted out by appointments so it’s just the two of you in the small, enclosed room. They disappear for a second, submerged in the water leaving only ripples behind that float across the top.
“Are you going to tell me what happened now?” Hange’s low voice comes from right next to you, causing your heart to skip a beat. Despite the unnerving crawl of your skin, you side eye them and shake your head.
Their words bounce around in your skull. If even Nanaba picked it up, that would mean Levi knew too, right? Is that why he brushed you off this morning? This wouldn’t be the first time that he’s held things back from you, but you hoped that had changed in the last handful of months. A fleeting thought of going to him first zooms through your mind and disappears just as quickly.
“Did he kiss you?” Hange’s voice is so close that you feel the heat of their breath blowing right against your ear. You push back from instinct, swatting the water and subsequently splashing them in the face.
“Oh my, he definitely did. Look at your face!” Hange muses as they tread up closer to your face and there’s half a foot between noses. You shove at the tops of their shoulders and blow them a raspberry. They were ever persistent.
‘If you must know, he didn’t kiss me.’ You’re suddenly focused on the waterspout sitting opposite of you on the wall.
“Damn. I was rea-“
‘I kissed him.’
“Wha-?! You?!”
Without another word, you turn your back on their open-mouthed stare and head for the sitting ledge in the back corner. Steam rises off your warm skin as you do, merging easily with the rest of the hot air. Hange follows, mumbling under their breath as they process the news. When you twist to sit down, you’re face to face with Hange as they squat into the water across from you.
“I’m guessing by your reactions, it didn’t go well?”
‘He pulled away and gave me a weird look.’
“What did he say after?”
You don’t answer that, instead you slide into the water until you’re halfway submerged again. The hot water tingles against your raw face, making you wince until the uncomfortable feeling subsides. A few bubbles burst on the surface from your released huff.
“You didn’t give him a chance to, did you?” They raise an eyebrow at you. The amusement that tugged at their features melted away to reveal concern. You raise your hands out of the water, water droplets falling back in with little splashes.
‘He pulled away quickly and gave me a look that didn’t really scream “yay”. What was I supposed to do?’
“Sit and talk to him like the adult you are?” More bubbles pop at the surface as your eyes narrow at them.
‘What if he doesn’t want to talk? Or even see me? Or be my friend anymore?’
“Well, did he kiss back?”
‘I don’t know. I can’t remember. A lot was happening.’
“I imagine he did. He likes you too, you know.”
You roll your eyes at that. Maybe he did, maybe he didn’t. But that doesn’t change the shocked expression that he stared at you with before you ran off for the night. You feel the pressure of his lips on your mouth again and it makes your heart skip a beat. How confusing this all was.
“Want me to make him talk to you?” Hange says with a smirk on their lips.
‘Don’t even think about it. He’ll just kill both of us.’ You flick water in their direction at which they chuckle at it.
“Just give it some time, you’ll figure it out. But probably not too much time because this was a friend group before you both decided to catch feelings and I will not have this group break apart because you both want to be teenagers about it all.” They shrug their shoulders at that.
‘What happens if we never talk again?’
“Not allowed. I’ll lock you two in a room if I have to. Oh wait, maybe I should do that? Then you’ll either talk, fight, or kiss again.” They ramble on, tapping a forefinger on their chin as they think. Their eyes shoot over to yours, wide and full of excitement.
“If you both start dating, it’s for the long run by the way. Marriage or nothing. I can’t risk the friend group falling apart.” They joke. Part of you thinks there’s a bit of truth in their words but you let it slide. The prospect of marriage though? Was it your face heating up at the thought or the hot water?
You give them an exasperated look despite it all, offering them a thumbs down as well.
“I’m only half joking. You and him will figure something out eventually. Who knows, maybe it’s all a misunderstanding! You’re shy and he’s… well. Him. Maybe you just need to make the first move.” They offer you a small smile, their eyes softening again.
That fleeting thought from earlier comes back. Again, Hange’s words held some truth as they always do. You already made the first move and that didn’t work out the way you planned. But If Levi didn’t know to come to you, maybe you would have to open that door for him, granted he doesn’t slam it in your face. You decide you’ll do what you can to pull him aside tonight.
.
Much to your dismay, the appointment ends too quickly. Fortunately, Hange kept up with their promise of taking you shopping since there were a few hours until it was time to meet up with the boys who were no doubt still out golfing. You laugh at the idea of Levi standing on the greens with a signature bored expression, but then you remember you were supposed to be anxious. You don’t know what you’re going to say to him.
After a while, you forget your worries for a time. Hange finds a really nice pantsuit that frames their tall body well. You found a simple sundress that frills out on your waist in a color that your sister exclaimed matched your eyes so well. And it was nice being able to chat, that feeling of dread that coursed through your veins like ice forgotten.
That is until you’re standing in front of Levi with your hands twisting in each other – a nervous habit you picked up just recently. The fabric of your dress feels like it’s digging into your skin as you stand awkwardly, your heart feeling as if it might explode. He doesn’t even look your way, eyes glued to his phone as he mindlessly scrolls. The idea of getting him to talk to you falters.
He's wearing a slate gray dress shirt in a complementary shade for his eyes. The sleeves are rolled up to his elbows neatly. The rest of his outfit is clean yet casual and perfect for the place Erwin had reserved. Some of his hair falls in his face as he continues to look down, ignoring the fact that Erwin was calling everyone to attention.
“Are we ready to go? The taxi is here.” Erwin gives you and Hange a once over when he looks up from his phone. “Wow, you both look like you had a good day - practically glowing.” He gives you a beaming smile and you force one back in return, feeling the quivering of your muscles as your lips pull back.
Levi glances up finally and his dark eyes scan the room. When they land on you, they linger for a second longer before he looks away as he pulls himself up from the barstool. You did not miss the subtle surprise that flashed across his face as well as his eyes flickering down to the sakura necklace you put back on for this evening. You had taken it off the last few days to keep it safe, something you were not used to doing before. You almost sighed in relief when you felt the familiar and subtle weight around your neck again.
The car ride to the restaurant was fortunately short but to you, it was agonizing the whole time. Erwin opted for the front seat to help direct the driver so that left you, Hange, and Levi in the back. Your sister forced you in the middle and they claimed it was for safety reasons but you knew better.
Your almost bare thigh sits against Levi’s after you all piled in, snug as can be. You pull your arms together so that you’re not squishing into Levi any more than you have to. He’s facing the window, arm propped up and leaning against it as he looks out. You spend the whole ride rehearsing what you wanted to say to him.
When the taxi parks in front of the restaurant, you take a deep breath. It was now or never, you tell yourself. You force yourself out of Levi’s side after he slides out, having to push the door as he almost shuts it in your face.
You’re able to reach far enough to grab his wrist to make him stop and he spins on you quickly, eyes flaring with annoyance – barely softening when he notices it’s you. It takes all of your strength to keep your fingers latched on to him despite the look on his face. After a moment, he helps you out of the car with that same hand, making sure to keep you steady as you almost trip on the curb.
‘Can we talk?’ You sign quickly.
He considers you, eyebrows pinched the way they do.
“Tch. We don’t have time, Hange and Erwin are waiting for us.” He finally grumbles back, eyes aimed at the retreating figures now walking through the double glass doors. He turns on his heels and leaps up the stairs, leaving you and your hurt feelings at the bottom.
So much for trying.
Even in your sour mood, you still appreciate how beautiful the restaurant is from the outside. It’s very high end with a large crystal chandelier peeping out of the tall windows that make up the majority of the front wall. The railings of both sides of the stairs are adorned with growing vines and colorful flowers. A simple sign in neat cursive hangs above the front doors, reading ‘La Crevette’. You raise an eyebrow at that but say nothing before making your way into the air-conditioned interior alone.
The inside is even better. The gold inlay that decorates the white marble adds a delicate and elegant tone. On the walls sit ceiling high mirrors that you can’t help but stare in as your eyes scan the new surroundings. You catch Levi’s eyes in the reflection before he turns away to follow the hostess who is now leading you all to your designated table.
To say that the atmosphere at the table was so tense you could cut it with a knife would have been an understatement. You find yourself sitting across from Levi - at least 5 feet away. The chill emanating from him makes you shiver and you wish you had brought a jacket with you.
Orders were already taken so now you sit in silence as Hange and Erwin compare the activities they both did today. Levi’s fingers drum against the clothed table as he stares out the window to the left of you. It looks out into the ocean, the setting sun painting the sky, those beautiful oranges and pinks that you liked so much. You fidget with the napkin that sits across your lap in tight fingers as you stare. Erwin calls your name.
“So how did you like the spa? Did they take care of you as well?” His clear eyes stare into yours with interest.
You smile politely and nod, signing along saying ‘They did, it was quite luxurious. Thank you for setting it up for us.’ He smiles back and chuckles.
“Hange said the baths were really nice. We might have to stop by one before we leave town, huh Levi?” The attention is now diverted onto a very bored looking Levi. He only hums in response, shrugging his shoulders as well.
‘You look like you got quite a bit of sun today.’ Your smile wavers as you eye him. There’s a soft flush across his cheeks as well as his nose and forehead. His gaze flickers up to you and you think you spot conflict in his steely eyes.
“I forgot a hat.” He says back, his curt tone a little too sharp for you. You pretend to not hear it. Your eyes fall onto your water glass after that, Hange and Erwin going back to talking about the other things they did today.
By the time dinner comes and disappears, the tense atmosphere barely stagnates. You sense Erwin and Hange can feel it too, but they don’t say anything. The only things you’re given are looks, ranging from curiosity to what you imagine is understanding. You don’t blame them though, this is really something that you and Levi need to hash out. Anxiety gnaws at your chest as you continue to pull on the thin fabric of your dress.
Eventually, the waiter comes with the check and hands it over to Erwin per his request - you all knew better than to argue with him about it. When Erwin hands the black book back with his card of choice, the waiter takes it and leans over to start gathering dishes out of the way. As he reaches from behind you, the feeling of his sleeve brushing against the side of your neck makes you stiffen up. When he pulls away, a small pop resonates by your ear.
The lack of weight around your neck is instantaneous. You watch in silent horror at your favorite necklace plopping into your lap softly. Everything goes quiet as you pick up the chain in shaky fingers, almost losing the sakura pendant as you do. The sight of the delicate golden chain now broken in a place that would not be an easy fix makes you feel like someone is stepping on your chest - crushing you.
You feel hot tears rolling down your face and you blink hard a few times. You’re in too much shock to make a sound. The waiter’s incessant apologies come muffled as realization dawns on you. You should have kept it tucked away and safe. You shouldn’t have kissed Levi. This necklace is you and Levi right now. Broken necklace, broken friendship. Your fault. All of it is your fault.
Placing it on the table gently, you force another sweet smile, one that closes your eyes and you feel more tears pressing out as you do.
‘I’m going to get some air.’ You sign.
Before anyone can protest, you push your chair out and away from the table, bumping into the still apologizing waiter. You sign a few hard apologies yourself before running down the ramp to the host station and out the front doors. Your feet take off down the street in the direction of the condo, tears streaming still but not a single sob escaping your lips.
A hand closes around your wrist, the force of your speed almost knocking you back as someone holds you still. The firm grip is telling enough that you don’t have to look around to see who it is, but you do anyway. Levi is out of breath from running after you, chest heaving and hair windswept.
“Where are you going?” His voice is stern and laced with annoyance.
You only shake your head in response, still feeling the tears rolling down your cheeks and off your chin. You have no energy left for a fake smile and his subtle annoyance feels like another knife in the chest. You’re not sure if it was the exhaustion, the necklace, or Levi, but you feel inexplicable rage boiling over. Ripping your arm out of his grip, you start signing roughly.
‘Why are you here?’
“I’m worried about you. You’re upset.” His steely eyes cut into yours, narrowing.
‘You could have fooled me. It seems to me you want nothing to do with me, ignoring me the way you have all day. What do you want?’ He flinches at that, surprised by your less than normal aggression.
“I-I’m sorry. I just don’t…” He runs his fingers through his hair, pushing it back and out of his face. He stumbles through his words, something you’ve never seen him do. But you can’t think about that right now, your patience is thinning and you can’t face him if he still refuses to acknowledge the hurt he’s dealt to you even if he didn’t realize it.
‘‘I can’t fix it.’ You sign shakily, fingers fumbling over each other.
“I’ll take a look at it. And if it’s not fixable, I can just get you a new one.” It dawns on you that Levi doesn’t understand, and you’re not certain if he ever did.
‘I’m not talking about the necklace, Levi!’ You’re in the middle of the sidewalk slamming your hands together as people rush past you two. As always, it feels as if it’s just you and Levi and everyone else are blurring streaks in the background. This time, it doesn’t feel as pleasant.
He doesn’t say anything back, choosing to stare with his lips parted as if he wanted to.
‘Why won’t you just talk to me? I thought you trusted me with yourself.’
“I do. Trust you, I mean.”
‘Then talk to me!’
“It’s not that simple.”
‘Right.’ You don’t give Levi a chance to refute as you turn around swiftly and start off in the direction of the condo, head hung low as you do your best to sniffle quietly. Fortunately, no one looks your way as you shuffle down the sidewalk.
Different layers of pain pile on your shoulders and you’re not sure how you’re going to get out from under them. The worst of them all seems to seep into your heart in a heavy way, weighing you down so much that you’re surprised you make it back to the elevator of the condo without collapsing. When the doors shut in front of you, you allow yourself to finally fall apart like you’ve been wanting to all day, sobs racking from deep within your chest.
.
The moment you get into the bedroom, you slam the door behind you and prep for bed. The lingering sunlight filters through the room, painting the room gold. You didn’t care what time it was, you just knew you were ready to pass out from the day.
As you loosen your hair from the multitude of pins sticking in it, you stare at yourself in the bathroom mirror. Your eyes are bloodshot, the skin around them puffy. At least you don’t have to do much since your tears broke down most of the makeup already, only needing the gentle swipe of a cloth. The moment after you slip on your sleepwear, you toss yourself into the soft sheets of your temporary bed and curl in on yourself.
The hurt from last night comes back tenfold. Only this time, frustration burns under your skin. Before you know it, nightmares come to you in the form of dark slate grays.
The next time your eyes open, they’re met with darkness. You’re not sure if the moon decided to stay away or if the clouds had rolled in during your slumber, but regardless your vision is pitch-black. Soft snoring to your right indicates that Hange had made it back and is currently deep in sleep. You vaguely recall hearing them calling out to you when they came back shortly after you fell asleep.
Rolling onto your back, you are greeted with the dim red light from the alarm clock illuminating the ceiling. You imagine it’s quite late in the night considering how refreshed you feel despite the lingering melancholy from dinner.
With a huff, you sit up and swing your legs off the bed. Your bare feet hit the cool, hard floor and you make quick yet quiet work of sneaking out of the bedroom. You know Hange could sleep through anything, but you did not want to suffer on the off-chance they woke up – you were not prepared to face them right now.
After closing the bedroom door, you pad over to the fridge and pull it open. The only drink options were a couple of beers and a handful of caffeinated sodas. You wish you had a cup of Levi’s tea in your hands, but instead you opt for water from the filtered pitcher. After taking a tentative sip of it, you decide that going back to sleep was not an option for you. You kick yourself for potentially screwing up your sleep schedule for the rest of the trip but that was a problem for future you.
With a cold glass in hand, you step over to the plush couch and sink into it. Grabbing the remote in the other, you turn it on and flinch as you’re met with a loud commercial about an action movie coming out soon. Quickly, you turn the volume down to one and sit still as you listen for any sounds of your roommates – luckily it stays silent. You sigh softly.
You pull over a blanket from the other side of the couch and tuck yourself in. You let your mind wander for a bit as a random movie starts to play, the low volume buzzing in the background. Thankfully, your thoughts stay away from Levi. That is, until you watch as a teacup is placed down on the glass coffee table in front of you with a clink as well as delicate fingers pulling away from the handle.
Blinking the glassiness from your vision, your eyes trail up the muscular arm that belongs to a weary-eyed Levi. His gaze shifts away quickly as he lowers himself on the other side of the couch as far as possible from you. He lifts his own teacup to his lips and takes a small sip, eyes forward on the movie ahead.
He doesn’t say anything to you, which you’re not certain if you should be grateful for, or annoyed. You were thinking about wanting some of his tea earlier, but now that it’s here, you’re torn between indulging him or not. As your eyes narrow on the steam that rises off the amber liquid, Levi pipes up finally.
“I didn’t poison it, if that’s what you’re wondering.” He mumbles. You flicker your eyes over to him, but his gaze stays glued to the TV in front.
You let out a soft huff and reach for it, taking the handle in between two fingers and pulling it up to your mouth. Upon the first sip, you withhold a sigh of content. Levi always knew how to make a mean cup of tea. But you won’t say that to him right now. You’re still fuming, tea or no. With that thought, you down it the best you can despite the scorching heat of it as it burns itself down to the pit of your stomach.
You stand when you’ve finished, placing the cup back onto the saucer and then turning around to fold the blanket back up. The space is turning tense by the second and you don’t want to deal with this right now. After placing the blanket on the armrest, you reach down to grab your tea set as well as Levi’s, but his hand stops you as his fingers close around your wrist once again.
“Stay. Please? I want to talk.” You side eye him, noting the nervousness in his eyes. If it wasn’t for that, you would have stormed off. For once, it seems Levi is ready to talk, and whether you were ready or not, you needed to listen.
Setting the saucers back down, you sit on the other side of the couch again, facing him with your arms placed over your chest. Only now do you realize you’re still in a nightgown that barely covers your ass and no bra. Trying to be natural about it, you grab the pillow that sits in the middle of the cushion and pull it to your chest to cover up.
“Are you having trouble sleeping?” He rubs the back of his neck as he watches you. His anxiety looks like it’s about to overflow.
‘Is that really all you want to talk about? Small talk?’
“No! Of course not.” He grumbles. He mirrors you, folding his arms across his chest. He’s getting defensive again.
‘Then what do you want?’ You click your tongue in annoyance.
“I don’t know wha-…” He falters.
‘You do know what you want. You just won’t say it.’
“It’s not that simple.”
‘But you know, don’t you? What is holding you back? What is making this so difficult for you to talk to me?’ Your signs come out more forceful than you meant.
His arms fall into his lap as his focus darts to the tv off to the side. You eye him warily and purse your lips while you wait for him to continue, which he does after sighing heavily in frustration.
“I’m afraid, okay? I’ve never felt so conflicted about stuff like this before. But I’m sorry I’ve been ignoring you all day. It wasn’t my intention to hurt you, I just didn’t know how to face you. Or what to even say to you.”
“I’m sorry.” he says quietly, shifting his gaze back to your face.
The look in his eyes is chock-full of anxiety and panic. Your fingers are flying before you can stop them. The strong walls of anger you had put up for protection start crumbling away, making room for disappointment as well as regret for making him feel this way.
‘I shouldn’t have kissed you, I’m sorry to have caused you so much strife.’ You bite the inside of your cheek.
Levi scoffs at that, his gray eyes cutting over to you, narrowing. He doesn’t say anything right away, instead using this moment to shift on the couch until his knees are against his chest as he faces you a couple feet away.
“Don’t be sorry.” He whispers finally, dark eyes piercing into yours.
‘You’ve been brushing me off all day. It’s because I kissed you when I shouldn’t have. You hate me. And you regret it even now.’ You feel the tears from earlier start to well again, but you refuse to let them spill in front of Levi.
“Why would I hate you?”
‘I just feel like I ruined our friendship with my actions, and you wouldn’t talk to me about it so I also feel like you want nothing to do with me because of it.’
“I don’t hate you.” He mutters, eyes shifting away before jumping back to yours. “I could never hate you.”
‘Then why won't you talk to me?’
Levi gets up abruptly and starts pacing back and forth in front of you with his shaky fingers raking through his hair. The anxiety radiating off him is palpable.
“It’s hard to put into words.” Levi says simply. A scowl appears as he pinches the bridge of his nose between fingers. He continues to pace, eyes half closed as he mutters to himself. You hear something about ‘not being used to this’ and ‘being blindsided’.
You lean forward and grab his pant leg with tight fingers. His sweatpants’ waistband slides down his hip from the sudden force of your grip, immobilizing him unless he wanted them pulled down any further. His steely eyes snap to your troubled expression and he softens immediately, hands dropping to his sides.
‘Just try.’ You give him your best pleading eyes, bottom lip jutting out as far as it can go.
Levi side eyes you as you hold him in place, his lips pinched into a thin line. He opens his mouth as he attempts to figure out what he wanted to say next. It takes a few tries but eventually, he settles on the last thing you’d expected him to say. It’s like his naturally stoic demeanor melts into something completely unrecognizable – not like you were complaining.
“When you kissed me, it was like I understood everything and nothing at the same time. I was so confused.” Levi mutters under his breath, sitting back down on the couch but this time on the cushion closest to you. His thigh brushes up against your knees, sending tingles up your spine from the sudden contact.
“Ever since you’ve stumbled back into my life, I couldn’t understand why you were always on my mind. I think I do now.” He continues without missing a beat. “I think I’ve always cherished you in some capacity, just in different stages.” Levi places his face in his hands that were propped up against his knees. After a few seconds, his head turns to you with a familiar expression. The way he looks at you reminds you of the little boy next door all those years ago.
“Leeeeeviii!!” You yell as you bound down the front steps without a care in the world. Your brother and Levi currently sit on the lawn, messing around with their action figures who were currently in a heated battle. In your excitement, you completely miss the bottom step and stumble down onto your hands and knees, rough concrete digging into your skin.
The wails that come out of you are loud enough that the dogs across the street start barking. A pair of hands are on you in an instant, helping to pull you up and onto the bottom step that had caused you so much trouble in the first place.
“I’ll go get some bandages.” Your brother says in a panic, running up the stairs and back in the house you had just come out of.
“You’re okay, it’s just some scratches.” You look up through blurry lashes to see Levi staring at your bleeding knees. You’re not going to bleed out, but crimson is trickling down your legs and it’s enough to make you cry harder.
Levi takes your little hands into his slightly bigger ones and inspects them. He brushes off the small gravel that had embedded itself into your skin, his tongue stuck between his teeth in focus. You observe him as best as you can despite the salty water obscuring your vision. Levi’s eyelashes flutter across his cheeks as he turns your hands over to get a better look at them.
“Not cut, just a little dirty. Nothing that can’t be fixed.” He says softly to you. Blue-gray eyes look up into yours and you realize you stopped crying. He offers you a lopsided grin as he squeezes your hand a few times.
“See? Not broken. You’ll be okay.”
He was always so calm with you. You shoot him a toothy grin while squeezing his hand back a few times. So calm. So safe.
“Levi, I’m never letting you go.”
You laugh at the sudden memory that flashes before your vision. You’re grateful for Levi in many ways, despite the fact he made you mad sometimes. Memory recovery was one of the reasons why. Levi’s eyes widen at your sudden outburst.
“What?”
‘Remember when I ate shit outside of my house when we were kids?’
He hesitates as he thinks.
“Which time?” His lips twitch at his comment and you realize it probably wasn’t the first time you had fallen. You appreciate your resilient nature as a kid, taking note of the small scars that probably decorated your knees even to this day.
‘Levi, I think there’s always been a part of me that’s always felt safe with you. And, I think having a future without you in it, no matter what that means, isn’t something I want to see. So, I think that’s why I was so torn up about this. The idea of you leaving just tears me apart.’
Levi sits up at your confession, staring at you in curiosity. There’s a new look of assurance on his face as he eyes you. A pink flush creeps up his neck and into his cheekbones as he focuses back on the colorful screen ahead.
“I don’t have any plans to leave.” He mutters.
There’s more silence, only cut up by the voices on the television and distant crashing of waves from down below. You watch him closely as he blinks slowly, propping his chin up in both arms that sit against his thighs. Before you can sign again, he speaks softly.
“I don’t regret it.” He side-eyes you, as if he were afraid to face you for such a statement.
‘What do you mean you don’t regret it?’
“It means I don’t regret that you kissed me.”
‘Did you want me to kiss you?’
Silence.
“You should probably get some sleep. I’m sure tomorrow will be just as exhausting. We can talk more then.” Levi says quietly, changing the subject.
You narrow your eyes at him, annoyed he would close up after so much progress. But then a yawn so big escapes your mouth and you shove your face into the pillow you were still hugging until it’s done. When you look back up, you see Levi watching you in amusement before his expression changes into indifference quickly. Maybe this would be best saved for the next day when you were both awake.
‘What about you?’
“I don’t sleep much, you know that. I’ll be okay.” He shrugs his shoulders as he gets up from the sofa. He reaches for the remote and turns off the tv then carefully places it back on the coffee table. Then he turns around to offer you a hand which you take, still hugging the pillow to your chest. He raises an eyebrow at that but turns on his heel to head to his bedroom. With a soft sigh, you place the pillow back and follow him down the hallway to your room.
The need to figure out what was going through his mind was strong, but your exhaustion hits harder. As you pass the kitchen, you note the time was about to hit five in the morning which means you have been up for a while. Despite the amount of sleep from earlier, you feel your body giving in to the heaviness of fatigue – no doubt a consequence of having such a taxing day.
You watch as Levi stops outside of his door, right hand gripping the doorknob in white knuckles. As you pass him, you reach over and place your hand on top of his. When his eyes fall on you, you offer a small smile.
‘What’s wrong?’
Before you can pull away, Levi says your name and stares over at you with longing.
“What am I to you?”
With shaky hands, you sign back, ‘What would you like to be, Levi?’ Adrenaline courses through your veins like lava at the sudden question.
“Yours.” It’s so soft, barely audible. And yet so full of conviction.
Levi looks down at your lips quickly before jumping back up to your eyes. In a swift motion, he releases the doorknob and grabs your hand, pulling you in closer to him with sudden force. His gaze is as firm as the grip on you, holding you in place. When he speaks again, his words come out measured.
“You’re right, I do know what I want. My answer is yours. I want to be yours.”
Your eyes widen at the sudden confession, and you stare at him with your lips parted in surprise. As if time slowed down, just like in the elevator, Levi tilts your chin in his direction - pinching it gently between his thumb and index finger. He leans in slowly, his eyes staring into yours as he wavers inches away. Levi is so close to you that his hot breath hits your face, and you smell hints of his black tea and traces of pine.
“And I want to kiss you. Is that okay?” You nod, dazed by his proximity.
Carefully, his mouth meets yours and you instantly distinguish the difference between this kiss and the one in the elevator. This one is hesitant, nervous. But traces of ravenous hunger linger as an aftertaste.
That same heat blazes from your face all the way down to your toes. Levi’s fingers move from your chin to right under your jaw, tilting your face into him even more. After a moment, he breaks away granting you a moment to catch your breath. His face is still inches from yours, gray eyes fluttering closed as your forehead rests against his. Your name tumbles out of his mouth, almost like a beg.
“I need to know.” He pulls away from you, the air around you instantly turning cold from the lack of his presence. “Will you let me?”
‘Let you what, Levi?’ You know what he wants, but you just want to hear him say it again. And again and again and again.
“Let me be yours.” Your smile would have blinded the whole world.
‘Mine.’
He leans in again, cupping your whole face in his calloused hand and locking his lips back over yours. The hunger intensifies just like the buzzing throughout your whole system. You open your mouth slightly to let his tongue in to explore and it does, eliciting a quiet moan from you. You swear you hear Levi growl in response. Oh, how touch starved you two were for each other.
As if in sync, Levi opens the bedroom door and you both stumble still lip-locked into his room. He pushes you up against the door, shutting it behind you. If you weren’t so lost in the kiss, you would have been worried by how loud the slam must have been. Levi presses up against you more, sandwiching you between the heat of his body and the cool wooden door behind you. You already feel how hard he is under his sweatpants.
You’re more inexperienced than most so there’s hesitation in your kiss – something Levi picks up on quickly. He pulls away but leaves his hands on your face as he looks at you with apprehension.
“We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to tonight.” He whispers to you. His voice is as sincere as it always is, albeit husky. You place a hand over his that sits on your face, leaning into it as you do before signing back.
‘I want all of you.’ You offer a loving smile, wide and full of adoration for the man in front of you. Levi’s eyes bounce back and forth between yours as if searching for something. He finds nothing but pure truth.
Levi’s lips crash back onto yours, careful but just as heated. As his marred lips leave and make their way down your neck, one of your hands slides up his chest to his undercut until your fingers find what they were looking for, tangling in his raven hair.
The moment you feel his teeth pinch your soft skin, another moan comes out louder than before. Having him pressed up against you like that, the outline of his cock pressing into your stomach, you start to feel your patience slowly unraveling.
Your nervousness flies out the window. This was Levi, you had no reason to worry. Levi is safe to you. He would take care of you as he always does. And you would do the same. The thought makes you smile up at the ceiling. Before you know it, your hands push against Levi’s soft skin, and he pulls away quickly. Worry pools into his dark eyes as he watches you carefully.
“Is everything okay?” He murmurs hoarsely.
Instead of signing back, you force him to step back towards the bed with your palm pressed against his chest until the back of his knees hit the edges of the mattress. The force alone makes him lurch back so that he falls back onto the soft duvet, catching himself on his hands so that he’s sitting up.
In a swift motion, you straddle his hips, and your lips find solace on his mouth yet again. You don’t hesitate to push your tongue through to taste him again, wrapping your arms around his neck and pressing yourself into him more.
You don’t mean to, but you find your hips grinding on to him, the only barriers between your already soaked self and Levi being the clothes you wish were off. The pressure and friction against your very sensitive core make you pull away for breath. Levi’s soft grunts are music to your ears and his lips start trailing back down your neck, his teeth finding purchase in your soft skin yet again. His fingers slide up your back, pulling your night dress up with it.
Then a groan comes out of his clenched teeth, full of frustration.
Levi pulls away again and stares up at you with heavy-lidded eyes full of impatience. You note that pink flush of his that you love so much, deeper in color and painting across his cheeks. As you stare down at him, you come to love this version of Levi and you want nothing but to see his face contort at the way you grinded into him. But he places his hands on your hips to keep you still, much to your dismay. You watch him carefully as he speaks, his voice husky.
“I-uh. I want this, I do. But we need to be safe. And I didn’t bri-“ He averts his gaze, staring at the corner of the bed. You were so lost in the exhilaration of it all, you didn’t think about it. A thick appreciation for him crashes over you because his cautious nature, even if it did slightly kill the heat of the moment.
‘Give me a second. I can help with this. Stay here.’ You give him a chaste kiss before sliding off his lap and out the door quickly. You tiptoe your way back to your room, making sure the only sounds that can be heard are the clock ticking on the wall and the muffled continuous crashing of waves just outside.
When you slip into your room, you see Hange flat on their back with their hair tousled everywhere. Soft snores escape their lips, a telltale sign they are out like a light. Hange wasn’t promiscuous in the slightest, but they weren’t closed minded either. And with that, it meant they stayed prepared.
You creep over to their unorganized suitcase where clothes were strewn all over the place. Reaching into the top compartment, your fingers feel the sharp edges of a foil package and slip it out. You blush to yourself as you think back to Levi’s outline as you make sure it’s the right size.
A snort from behind you makes you freeze in place, breath hitched as you sit crouching in silence. A moment passes. Another minute. Hange’s snores fill the room again and you let loose your held breath, shoulders sagging. You’re sure this conversation would come up again later, but you didn’t want to deal with it right now. Especially with Levi waiting for you.
It takes you next to no time to slip out of your room and back into Levi’s, closing his door with a soft click. Turning around, you show him the condom in between pinched fingers and smile widely to Levi who was still sitting on the edge of the bed for you.
“Did you come prepared?” He raises an eyebrow at the glittering foil.
‘No, but Hange do-‘
“I don’t need to know any more.” Levi blurts out, hands up in defeat. A silent laugh shakes your shoulders as you make your way back over to him. You fling the package onto the bed before straddling him again, noting how hard he was underneath you still.
‘Now where were we?’ You sign with a small smile. Levi smirks and places his hand against your cheek, his thumb tracing your bottom lip gently. You playfully nip at him, and he huffs in amusement.
“You’re breathtakingly beautiful, you know that?” He asks you softly before pulling your face into his and locking his lips on yours. It’s a saccharine-laced kiss. His hands find your hips again, lowering until they are fully on your ass, and they squeeze. A squeak escapes into his mouth as he does, and it just makes his grip on your skin tighter.
Pulling away, you grip his t-shirt from the bottom and start tugging it up. Levi leans back so you can pull it up and over his head, discarding it on the bed next to him. Your hands trail down his toned chest and abs, his skin burning under your touch. It’s soft despite the hard muscles underneath them. Your mouth finds his again as your hands explore, not hesitating to slip your tongue into Levi’s already parted lips.
Your hands find their way back in his hair, fingers entwining through the fine strands. You can’t help it – you tug gently, and a small whine comes out of his pouty lips as he’s pulled away from your mouth. Something inside you burns and again you feel your razor thin patience cutting at you.
As if Levi reads your mind, he wraps an arm around your back while leaving his other hand cupping your ass and stands up effortlessly. In a mere moment, he turns around with you in his strong arms and then gently tosses you on to the bed. A soft laugh escapes you as you land. Everything around you smells like Levi.
Levi stands at the foot of the bed and stares down at you ravenously, a look you don’t think you’ve ever seen on anyone outside of the movies on your television screen. You sit up on your elbows and watch as he gets on the bed and slowly makes his way on top of you. He meets your lips with his own as his body hovers over yours, his fingers lightly trailing up your arms resulting in goosebumps following in their wake.
Slowly, you lie back down flush to the mattress, his knees digging into the sheets on either side of your thighs. Levi’s lips start to slide down your jaw which gives you some space to breathe but your breaths quickly turn into soft whimpers as his fingers lightly trace across your lower abdomen. His other hand snakes around the back of your neck, supporting it as he starts planting more soft kisses down it.
“You can stop me at any time, okay?” Levi whispers, his hot breath tickling your neck. You nod, only wishing you had your voice to say his name and tell him you wanted him. As long as he was with you, you would always want him.
Levi’s hand that was teasing your waist makes its way back up to the lacy lining that adorns the edge of your nightdress, long fingers tugging down the thin fabric that holds your breasts in place. You’re glad Levi isn’t watching your face because you are multiple shades of embarrassment.
But Levi doesn’t say anything, instead he takes a breast in hand and massages it gently as his kisses start trailing down past your collarbone. Before you know it, his soft lips clamp around your already very sensitive nipple, eliciting a loud moan from you. You can’t help but dig your nails into the firm muscles of his back in response, dragging them down as Levi bites down gently. An exhale of hot air blows out of Levi’s mouth against your skin when you do that, a small grunt escaping with it.
You feel the absence of his lips immediately as his lips leave and the wetness left behind leaves your skin defenseless against the cool air. Levi softly kisses back up your sternum then pulls away, leaning forward on both hands that now sit on each side of your face. His tousled hair falls forward, creating shadows across his face as he stares down with that same hungry look, only this time it’s tinted with pure amazement.
“Still okay?” He whispers down to you.
You blink up at him and swallow hard. You were more than okay but as always, your words fail you. Instead, you nod and the hands that once dragged down his back are now trailing down his chest again. The feeling of his skin against yours sends electricity through your whole body, and you want more. You need more. Your hands flatten against right above his rapidly beating heart as you do your best to give him a look that conveys ‘more’.
“I’ve got you.” Those were the words he had muttered down to you the day before as you fell asleep in his arms on the beach. It wasn’t just cherishment that he held for you; it was deeper than that. Hange’s words from earlier flit through your mind, only briefly. How could you not have fully noticed until now?
He leans down and places his lips back on yours, soft and sweet. As your lips lock on to his, you feel his feather light touch trace back down to the elastic band of your underwear. But instead of teasing you like he had before, you feel his fingers dip under the cloth and further down to…
Any other thoughts racing through your mind cease to exist as his delicate fingers slide down your slick folds. You don’t mean to moan as loud as you do and fortunately Levi’s mouth muffles it for you. He hums in response to your reactions, smiling into the kiss.
Levi’s lips graze back down to just under your ear as his fingers rub small circles around your clit eliciting more moans from you. Your labored breaths fill the space as the white-hot heat from his touch reverberates throughout your whole body, tingling down to the tips of your toes. He whispers your name under a heavy breath, mutterings of how beautiful you are to him floating up to your ear. All sweet words mirror the moans you made.
You reach down to Levi’s hardened bulge that currently fights against the stretched fabric of his joggers. Your fingers close around him as much as they can through the thick cloth. Upon contact, Levi’s breath hitches. You give him a gentle squeeze resulting in a guttural groan that comes through his clenched teeth.
In response, his touch burns deep into your core as he carefully pushes a digit into your warm entrance, the palm of his hand applying pressure onto your swollen clit as he does. His movements are gentle as he pumps it in and out slowly, and you feel his finger curving up into a spot so good your toes curl. The euphoria turns into building heat, and you know what’s about to happen - but you wanted more. You wanted him now more than ever and this was not enough. More, more, more.
A soft whine comes out of you as your fingers tighten around him. A light huff tickles against your skin – Levi’s way of chuckling.
“Are you sure you’re ready?” He mumbles, his lips finding your earlobe and nipping at it gently. Reaching over with your other hand, you place your hand against his cheek and pull him up to you, planting your lips right onto his. It’s a hungry kiss, one conveying you were ready for him. You love him, you want him. You need him.
With that, Levi withdraws his hand and slides himself off you and the bed. You sit up and watch as he tugs down his pants along with his boxers. You knew what was coming and yet you couldn’t stop the blood rushing to your cheeks in shy embarrassment. You look away, staring at the ceiling as you hear Levi pick his clothes up including the shirt you threw on the bed, and then place them neatly on the dresser behind him. Your name quietly tumbles out his lips for your attention.
When you look up at him, you see him offering a hand to you. Your eyes flicker down for a mere second before going back up to Levi’s soft gaze. You feel as if you could faint on the spot.
Instead, you push yourself closer to the edge of the bed and take Levi’s hand. In a delicate flourish, you’re in his arms again and he pulls you in for another deep, lingering kiss. His fingers bunch at the bottom of your night dress and start lifting it up. You let him, pulling away enough so he can get the soft fabric up and over your head. He folds it and turns to place it next to his pants. When he circles back on you, he takes a moment to observe your half-naked self.
Being in your thin bathing suit was one thing, but to be standing there as the cool air conditioning drifted across your unprotected self was in a whole other universe. You shift your weight awkwardly and twist your arms together as you avert your gaze to the piled-on dresser.
Levi steps closer to you and takes both of your arms in a gentle grip and pulls them away from each other so that you’re exposed to him. You force your gaze on him despite how nervous you were to be in front of him. Levi’s dark eyes trail down your body but not in an ogling kind of way – he watches you with wonder.
“You’re just so beautiful. Every part of you.” He releases your arms, and his hands are back on you, sliding down your waist and landing on your hips. His fingers leave a trail of tingles. “I want you, all of you. If you’ll have me. Is that okay?” He whispers to you, pulling you by the hips into him. The length of his hardened self presses against your bare stomach as he does.
You sign that same simple word, ‘Mine’.
With that, Levi gently pushes you down into the bed with a hard kiss, leaning into you until your back is pressed against the mattress. He loops his fingers into the sides of your panties and tugs them down your legs, pulling away from you yet again to place them next to the rest of the discarded clothes. At that moment, he takes the time to rip a corner off the metallic package with his teeth, the foil discarded onto the dresser once done.
He grabs your hips again, this time pulling you flush to the edge of the bed as he stands at the foot of it. His hand makes its way to your thigh and his perfectly trimmed nails press into your soft skin as he holds you close. The tip of his cock teases your entrance and if you had a voice, you would have begged for it. As usual, you didn’t have to.
Levi leans down to you and kisses you slowly, teeth brushing against your swollen bottom lip. He places his other hand on the bed next to your head, using it to keep himself propped up. His hair hangs low as he hovers, already moist with sweat from the proximity and building body heat between the two of you. You use one hand to grip his forearm while the other hand slides up the back of his head and into his sweaty hair, fingers digging into his scalp. As the kiss deepens, so do his movements into you.
Levi slides himself in gently, using his hold on your thigh to control his speed. He lifts your leg up against his hip for a better angle but the sharp gasp from you stops Levi in his tracks. He stays there, feeling your warm walls hugging tightly around him.
He pulls away from the kiss and hovers over you again, looking down into your eyes with worry. It's been a while since you have been touched like this, let alone this intimate. You don’t think you’ve ever felt this loved. Levi makes this all so easy despite the anxious knot in your chest. You realize it isn’t just this that he makes easy, though. It’s everything around you. Every issue, every solution.
You imagine you’re looking at him just the same, a small smile etching into your flushed and hot face. Before he can ask again, you move your hand up and under his fingers that digs into the bed next to you. Lacing your fingers in with his, you squeeze his hand a few times.
A way to say you were okay and that you trusted him. And always would.
He looks down at you curiously but then realization dawns on him. His concern washes away to reveal his own version of adoration for you. It’s one of your favorite expressions on him by far.
In a breathless moan, Levi pushes himself all the way in. He presses his lips onto yours, muffling your moans that rise in volume as he slowly rocks into you. The hand he had on your thigh tightens as he pulls you into him more, quickening his pace slightly. The new angle hits a spot that almost puts you at the brink of finishing right then and there.
Levi lets go of your hand and moves his arm under your neck again, giving him the opportunity to trail his now sloppy kisses and teeth down it. Those razor-sharp teeth sink into your skin as one of his thrusts hit simultaneously. You bite into the back of your hand to keep yourself from wailing out and waking the rest of your roommates. The other hand that now sits against his sweaty chest digs into his skin, burying deeper with every thrust. It feels as if every part of your body burns like wildfire from his touch. Your name comes out in a groan this time, husky and deep.
“God, you’re fucking beautiful. You feel so good.” He buries his face into your collarbone as he moans your name again, shakily.
Levi thrusts soon become clumsy, feeling him slam into you inconsistently and with every hit comes more pressure against your clit. Heat builds into your core, the same as before. You’re pulling at his hair, in an attempt to warn him you were close. Throaty curses leave his lips as you both feel each other tense up.
In an instant, it’s like the world crumbles around you as you hit your limit. The walls surrounding Levi clenches as each wave of pleasure rolls through your whole system. Your orgasm sends Levi over the edge and in one deep thrust of his hips, you feel his body shudder as his moan almost turns into a whine. His teeth bite into you again as he rides through his own climax, filling up the condom within you.
Levi releases your leg and lets it fall gently against the bed before collapsing on top of you. He uses an arm to keep himself propped up enough to not suffocate you with his body weight. You focus on the heavy panting emanating from the both of you as you come down from your high. His heart beats in sync with your own against as he lays on top of you, digging his face into the crook of your neck.
You wrap your arms around his head and hold him close, despite the heat and sticky sweat between your bodies. Levi nuzzles his nose into sweaty soft skin and chuckles, low and hoarse. You both continue to lay like that until the breathing slows down to a normal pace. The next time he speaks, his voice is so soft and barely audible that you almost miss it.
“I love you too.”
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☾ Previous Chapter: June Part 3
☾ Next Chapter: June Part 5 [Final]
#attack on titan#attack on titan fanfiction#shingeki no kyojin#shingeki no kyojin fanfiction#levi ackerman#levi ackerman fanfiction#fanfiction#fluff#levi x reader#levi ackerman x reader#erwin smith#hange zoe#levi x fem!reader#aot#aot fanfiction#levi ackerman x you#snk fanfiction#long fic#snk#aot fluff#attack on titan fluff#attack on titan levi#unspoken words#modernau#levi smut#levi ackerman smut#smut#slowburn#x reader
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Chapter 8: June - Part Four [NSFW]
☾ Pairings ➼ Levi Ackerman x fem!mute!Reader (she/her pronouns), set in a modern semi-fictional world
☾ Summary ➼ Due to childhood trauma, you find yourself an adult without the ability to speak. After years of working on it, you have found ways to live without a voice. Now here in your late 20s, you are 5 months in getting used to a new town. On a fateful day in late November, you and your adopted sister visit a local bookstore-café, unaware of the friendships about to blossom. Throughout the months, one friendship in particular develops into something more.
☾ Content/Warnings ➼ fluff, slowburn, oblivious feelings, romance, angst, mention of minor character deaths, trauma, illness, adoption, mentions of fire, disabilities, alcohol use, very light nsfw mentions, references to child abuse, smoking and alcohol abuse mentions, domestic violence, light assault, uhhh- sex? idk how to tag this kind of stuff.
☾ Author's note ➼ Hehe, hi! I bet y'all never thought you'd see this tag OR BANNER on here ever. Tbh, I thought I would never see this tag or banner on any of my writings. But uhhhh- here we are! If it isn't obvious, this is my first time EVER writing smut. I've never even written self-indulgent smut before because it is REALLY HARD FOR ME TO DO. That's mainly why this chapter took so long (I'M SORRY); I wanted to make sure it was perfect. If you're a minor and read the smut I will find you and cut you! Hehe. Anyways. Again, I am so sorry this chapter took so long!! I've hit quite a rut in my life and I'm just really glad to have gotten it done in the first place. Let me know what y'all think!! ALSO CAN Y'ALL BELIEVE THERE'S ONLY ONE MORE PART LEFT HOLD ME I'M CRYING
☾ Word Count ➼ ~10.9k
The visual of Levi’s bewilderment haunts you just as much as the feeling of his lips on yours does. You’re not sure why you thought kissing your friend would be a good idea at all. Regret gnaws at you as you find yourself in a vicious cycle of rumination.
But it wasn’t all regret, was it? You wanted to kiss him. And you liked it.
Maybe it wasn’t regret at all, actually. What you really felt in your core was disappointment. At yourself for not thinking before acting and at him for not responding the way you inwardly hoped he would. If Levi’s cold shoulder this morning wasn’t proof enough, you don’t know what was.
“Love?” Hange’s voice cuts through the white noise reverberating through your skull. Slowly, you turn to where your sister currently sits with light green paste smeared all over their face. You blink the glassiness away and raise an eyebrow at them – which is a little hard to do as you have the same paste smudged on your face that is in the process of drying.
“Were you listening at all?” Concerned eyes bore into yours. You’d say you were thankful for the green tea facial that covers the dark circles under your lashes, but you knew Hange had noticed the moment they laid eyes on you today. They click their tongue and sit upright in your direction.
“What’s going on in that head of yours?”
‘What do you mean?’
“You look like you didn’t sleep a wink last night and you have been out of it all day. What are you thinking about?”
‘It’s nothing. Just had trouble sleeping.’
“You’re only restless when you have something on your mind.”
You stick your bottom lip out. In truth, you really did want to talk about it, but you weren’t sure what you wanted to say. Hange wasn’t the type to let things go when it came to you though, especially when you’re distressed. You’d need to say something now whether you liked it or not.
‘I like Levi.’ You sign quickly, averting your gaze from the piercing light-brown eyed stare burning holes in your face. You sigh softly and tuck your chin in the white fluffy robe that wraps around your body, ignoring the fact that you’re wiping the face mask off into the fabric as you do. It takes them a moment to realize you’re not planning on saying anything else.
“And that’s upsetting?” They laugh and relax back into the plush cushions. “That’s nothing new. I’ve known for a long time.”
Your eyes cut over to Hange again at that, wide in shock.
‘You knew? How? Since when?’
“I know when someone’s smitten. And you my darling? You are smitten like a kitten.” They roll their head in your direction as they speak, eyes sparkling. “Probably since February.”
Was it that early?
‘Can you be specific?’ You feel your face heat up from under the thick mask.
“If only you had a mirror. You should see the way you look at Levi. It’s so obvious, even Nanaba picked up on it.” They smirk as they twist in your direction, resting their chin on a hand that sits propped up on the armrest. A wide smile carved up and into their eyes.
“What happened last night anyways that made you discover this known secret?” Hange already knew, they had to have. Their demeanor changed from worried to curious in the blink of an eye.
‘Nothing.’ You sit back in a huff, closing your eyes.
You hear Hange sigh softly but doesn’t press for the next half hour. Your body sinks deeper into the plush massage chair as your head sits back on the head rest. Off to the side, you hear the soft babbling of the fountain piece that pairs wells with the gentle spa music that floats from the ceiling speakers down to your ears. Your brain wanders and you feel the heaviness that comes with sleep about to settle in.
“Excuse me?” A sudden voice startles you. You pop an eye open to see a spa employee in mint robes standing in front of the chairs you and Hange were relaxing in. “It’s time to move on to the hot pools, are you both ready?”
“Oh yes!! I’ve been looking forward to this part.” Hange exclaims, practically throwing themselves out of the chair.
.
The steamy mineral water stings your skin upon first contact. It wasn't uncomfortably hot, but it was close. It takes you a few seconds to get used to it and before you know it, you’re sinking low until your nose is submerged. Only your eyes and up show, like a crocodile floating as it hunts. You had put your hair up so that it wouldn’t get wet, but a few loose strands decide they want to get wet anyways as they float around your face.
Your sister, on the other hand, does not take the gentle approach. Before you know it, they’re running down the ramp ass naked. They throw themselves into the water when they get deep enough, throwing water straight in your face. Luckily, the pools are slotted out by appointments so it’s just the two of you in the small, enclosed room. They disappear for a second, submerged in the water leaving only ripples behind that float across the top.
“Are you going to tell me what happened now?” Hange’s low voice comes from right next to you, causing your heart to skip a beat. Despite the unnerving crawl of your skin, you side eye them and shake your head.
Their words bounce around in your skull. If even Nanaba picked it up, that would mean Levi knew too, right? Is that why he brushed you off this morning? This wouldn’t be the first time that he’s held things back from you, but you hoped that had changed in the last handful of months. A fleeting thought of going to him first zooms through your mind and disappears just as quickly.
“Did he kiss you?” Hange’s voice is so close that you feel the heat of their breath blowing right against your ear. You push back from instinct, swatting the water and subsequently splashing them in the face.
“Oh my, he definitely did. Look at your face!” Hange muses as they tread up closer to your face and there’s half a foot between noses. You shove at the tops of their shoulders and blow them a raspberry. They were ever persistent.
‘If you must know, he didn’t kiss me.’ You’re suddenly focused on the waterspout sitting opposite of you on the wall.
“Damn. I was rea-“
‘I kissed him.’
“Wha-?! You?!”
Without another word, you turn your back on their open-mouthed stare and head for the sitting ledge in the back corner. Steam rises off your warm skin as you do, merging easily with the rest of the hot air. Hange follows, mumbling under their breath as they process the news. When you twist to sit down, you’re face to face with Hange as they squat into the water across from you.
“I’m guessing by your reactions, it didn’t go well?”
‘He pulled away and gave me a weird look.’
“What did he say after?”
You don’t answer that, instead you slide into the water until you’re halfway submerged again. The hot water tingles against your raw face, making you wince until the uncomfortable feeling subsides. A few bubbles burst on the surface from your released huff.
“You didn’t give him a chance to, did you?” They raise an eyebrow at you. The amusement that tugged at their features melted away to reveal concern. You raise your hands out of the water, water droplets falling back in with little splashes.
‘He pulled away quickly and gave me a look that didn’t really scream “yay”. What was I supposed to do?’
“Sit and talk to him like the adult you are?” More bubbles pop at the surface as your eyes narrow at them.
‘What if he doesn’t want to talk? Or even see me? Or be my friend anymore?’
“Well, did he kiss back?”
‘I don’t know. I can’t remember. A lot was happening.’
“I imagine he did. He likes you too, you know.”
You roll your eyes at that. Maybe he did, maybe he didn’t. But that doesn’t change the shocked expression that he stared at you with before you ran off for the night. You feel the pressure of his lips on your mouth again and it makes your heart skip a beat. How confusing this all was.
“Want me to make him talk to you?” Hange says with a smirk on their lips.
‘Don’t even think about it. He’ll just kill both of us.’ You flick water in their direction at which they chuckle at it.
“Just give it some time, you’ll figure it out. But probably not too much time because this was a friend group before you both decided to catch feelings and I will not have this group break apart because you both want to be teenagers about it all.” They shrug their shoulders at that.
‘What happens if we never talk again?’
“Not allowed. I’ll lock you two in a room if I have to. Oh wait, maybe I should do that? Then you’ll either talk, fight, or kiss again.” They ramble on, tapping a forefinger on their chin as they think. Their eyes shoot over to yours, wide and full of excitement.
“If you both start dating, it’s for the long run by the way. Marriage or nothing. I can’t risk the friend group falling apart.” They joke. Part of you thinks there’s a bit of truth in their words but you let it slide. The prospect of marriage though? Was it your face heating up at the thought or the hot water?
You give them an exasperated look despite it all, offering them a thumbs down as well.
“I’m only half joking. You and him will figure something out eventually. Who knows, maybe it’s all a misunderstanding! You’re shy and he’s… well. Him. Maybe you just need to make the first move.” They offer you a small smile, their eyes softening again.
That fleeting thought from earlier comes back. Again, Hange’s words held some truth as they always do. You already made the first move and that didn’t work out the way you planned. But If Levi didn’t know to come to you, maybe you would have to open that door for him, granted he doesn’t slam it in your face. You decide you’ll do what you can to pull him aside tonight.
.
Much to your dismay, the appointment ends too quickly. Fortunately, Hange kept up with their promise of taking you shopping since there were a few hours until it was time to meet up with the boys who were no doubt still out golfing. You laugh at the idea of Levi standing on the greens with a signature bored expression, but then you remember you were supposed to be anxious. You don’t know what you’re going to say to him.
After a while, you forget your worries for a time. Hange finds a really nice pantsuit that frames their tall body well. You found a simple sundress that frills out on your waist in a color that your sister exclaimed matched your eyes so well. And it was nice being able to chat, that feeling of dread that coursed through your veins like ice forgotten.
That is until you’re standing in front of Levi with your hands twisting in each other – a nervous habit you picked up just recently. The fabric of your dress feels like it’s digging into your skin as you stand awkwardly, your heart feeling as if it might explode. He doesn’t even look your way, eyes glued to his phone as he mindlessly scrolls. The idea of getting him to talk to you falters.
He's wearing a slate gray dress shirt in a complementary shade for his eyes. The sleeves are rolled up to his elbows neatly. The rest of his outfit is clean yet casual and perfect for the place Erwin had reserved. Some of his hair falls in his face as he continues to look down, ignoring the fact that Erwin was calling everyone to attention.
“Are we ready to go? The taxi is here.” Erwin gives you and Hange a once over when he looks up from his phone. “Wow, you both look like you had a good day - practically glowing.” He gives you a beaming smile and you force one back in return, feeling the quivering of your muscles as your lips pull back.
Levi glances up finally and his dark eyes scan the room. When they land on you, they linger for a second longer before he looks away as he pulls himself up from the barstool. You did not miss the subtle surprise that flashed across his face as well as his eyes flickering down to the sakura necklace you put back on for this evening. You had taken it off the last few days to keep it safe, something you were not used to doing before. You almost sighed in relief when you felt the familiar and subtle weight around your neck again.
The car ride to the restaurant was fortunately short but to you, it was agonizing the whole time. Erwin opted for the front seat to help direct the driver so that left you, Hange, and Levi in the back. Your sister forced you in the middle and they claimed it was for safety reasons but you knew better.
Your almost bare thigh sits against Levi’s after you all piled in, snug as can be. You pull your arms together so that you’re not squishing into Levi any more than you have to. He’s facing the window, arm propped up and leaning against it as he looks out. You spend the whole ride rehearsing what you wanted to say to him.
When the taxi parks in front of the restaurant, you take a deep breath. It was now or never, you tell yourself. You force yourself out of Levi’s side after he slides out, having to push the door as he almost shuts it in your face.
You’re able to reach far enough to grab his wrist to make him stop and he spins on you quickly, eyes flaring with annoyance – barely softening when he notices it’s you. It takes all of your strength to keep your fingers latched on to him despite the look on his face. After a moment, he helps you out of the car with that same hand, making sure to keep you steady as you almost trip on the curb.
‘Can we talk?’ You sign quickly.
He considers you, eyebrows pinched the way they do.
“Tch. We don’t have time, Hange and Erwin are waiting for us.” He finally grumbles back, eyes aimed at the retreating figures now walking through the double glass doors. He turns on his heels and leaps up the stairs, leaving you and your hurt feelings at the bottom.
So much for trying.
Even in your sour mood, you still appreciate how beautiful the restaurant is from the outside. It’s very high end with a large crystal chandelier peeping out of the tall windows that make up the majority of the front wall. The railings of both sides of the stairs are adorned with growing vines and colorful flowers. A simple sign in neat cursive hangs above the front doors, reading ‘La Crevette’. You raise an eyebrow at that but say nothing before making your way into the air-conditioned interior alone.
The inside is even better. The gold inlay that decorates the white marble adds a delicate and elegant tone. On the walls sit ceiling high mirrors that you can’t help but stare in as your eyes scan the new surroundings. You catch Levi’s eyes in the reflection before he turns away to follow the hostess who is now leading you all to your designated table.
To say that the atmosphere at the table was so tense you could cut it with a knife would have been an understatement. You find yourself sitting across from Levi - at least 5 feet away. The chill emanating from him makes you shiver and you wish you had brought a jacket with you.
Orders were already taken so now you sit in silence as Hange and Erwin compare the activities they both did today. Levi’s fingers drum against the clothed table as he stares out the window to the left of you. It looks out into the ocean, the setting sun painting the sky, those beautiful oranges and pinks that you liked so much. You fidget with the napkin that sits across your lap in tight fingers as you stare. Erwin calls your name.
“So how did you like the spa? Did they take care of you as well?” His clear eyes stare into yours with interest.
You smile politely and nod, signing along saying ‘They did, it was quite luxurious. Thank you for setting it up for us.’ He smiles back and chuckles.
“Hange said the baths were really nice. We might have to stop by one before we leave town, huh Levi?” The attention is now diverted onto a very bored looking Levi. He only hums in response, shrugging his shoulders as well.
‘You look like you got quite a bit of sun today.’ Your smile wavers as you eye him. There’s a soft flush across his cheeks as well as his nose and forehead. His gaze flickers up to you and you think you spot conflict in his steely eyes.
“I forgot a hat.” He says back, his curt tone a little too sharp for you. You pretend to not hear it. Your eyes fall onto your water glass after that, Hange and Erwin going back to talking about the other things they did today.
By the time dinner comes and disappears, the tense atmosphere barely stagnates. You sense Erwin and Hange can feel it too, but they don’t say anything. The only things you’re given are looks, ranging from curiosity to what you imagine is understanding. You don’t blame them though, this is really something that you and Levi need to hash out. Anxiety gnaws at your chest as you continue to pull on the thin fabric of your dress.
Eventually, the waiter comes with the check and hands it over to Erwin per his request - you all knew better than to argue with him about it. When Erwin hands the black book back with his card of choice, the waiter takes it and leans over to start gathering dishes out of the way. As he reaches from behind you, the feeling of his sleeve brushing against the side of your neck makes you stiffen up. When he pulls away, a small pop resonates by your ear.
The lack of weight around your neck is instantaneous. You watch in silent horror at your favorite necklace plopping into your lap softly. Everything goes quiet as you pick up the chain in shaky fingers, almost losing the sakura pendant as you do. The sight of the delicate golden chain now broken in a place that would not be an easy fix makes you feel like someone is stepping on your chest - crushing you.
You feel hot tears rolling down your face and you blink hard a few times. You’re in too much shock to make a sound. The waiter’s incessant apologies come muffled as realization dawns on you. You should have kept it tucked away and safe. You shouldn’t have kissed Levi. This necklace is you and Levi right now. Broken necklace, broken friendship. Your fault. All of it is your fault.
Placing it on the table gently, you force another sweet smile, one that closes your eyes and you feel more tears pressing out as you do.
‘I’m going to get some air.’ You sign.
Before anyone can protest, you push your chair out and away from the table, bumping into the still apologizing waiter. You sign a few hard apologies yourself before running down the ramp to the host station and out the front doors. Your feet take off down the street in the direction of the condo, tears streaming still but not a single sob escaping your lips.
A hand closes around your wrist, the force of your speed almost knocking you back as someone holds you still. The firm grip is telling enough that you don’t have to look around to see who it is, but you do anyway. Levi is out of breath from running after you, chest heaving and hair windswept.
“Where are you going?” His voice is stern and laced with annoyance.
You only shake your head in response, still feeling the tears rolling down your cheeks and off your chin. You have no energy left for a fake smile and his subtle annoyance feels like another knife in the chest. You’re not sure if it was the exhaustion, the necklace, or Levi, but you feel inexplicable rage boiling over. Ripping your arm out of his grip, you start signing roughly.
‘Why are you here?’
“I’m worried about you. You’re upset.” His steely eyes cut into yours, narrowing.
‘You could have fooled me. It seems to me you want nothing to do with me, ignoring me the way you have all day. What do you want?’ He flinches at that, surprised by your less than normal aggression.
“I-I’m sorry. I just don’t…” He runs his fingers through his hair, pushing it back and out of his face. He stumbles through his words, something you’ve never seen him do. But you can’t think about that right now, your patience is thinning and you can’t face him if he still refuses to acknowledge the hurt he’s dealt to you even if he didn’t realize it.
‘‘I can’t fix it.’ You sign shakily, fingers fumbling over each other.
“I’ll take a look at it. And if it’s not fixable, I can just get you a new one.” It dawns on you that Levi doesn’t understand, and you’re not certain if he ever did.
‘I’m not talking about the necklace, Levi!’ You’re in the middle of the sidewalk slamming your hands together as people rush past you two. As always, it feels as if it’s just you and Levi and everyone else are blurring streaks in the background. This time, it doesn’t feel as pleasant.
He doesn’t say anything back, choosing to stare with his lips parted as if he wanted to.
‘Why won’t you just talk to me? I thought you trusted me with yourself.’
“I do. Trust you, I mean.”
‘Then talk to me!’
“It’s not that simple.”
‘Right.’ You don’t give Levi a chance to refute as you turn around swiftly and start off in the direction of the condo, head hung low as you do your best to sniffle quietly. Fortunately, no one looks your way as you shuffle down the sidewalk.
Different layers of pain pile on your shoulders and you’re not sure how you’re going to get out from under them. The worst of them all seems to seep into your heart in a heavy way, weighing you down so much that you’re surprised you make it back to the elevator of the condo without collapsing. When the doors shut in front of you, you allow yourself to finally fall apart like you’ve been wanting to all day, sobs racking from deep within your chest.
.
The moment you get into the bedroom, you slam the door behind you and prep for bed. The lingering sunlight filters through the room, painting the room gold. You didn’t care what time it was, you just knew you were ready to pass out from the day.
As you loosen your hair from the multitude of pins sticking in it, you stare at yourself in the bathroom mirror. Your eyes are bloodshot, the skin around them puffy. At least you don’t have to do much since your tears broke down most of the makeup already, only needing the gentle swipe of a cloth. The moment after you slip on your sleepwear, you toss yourself into the soft sheets of your temporary bed and curl in on yourself.
The hurt from last night comes back tenfold. Only this time, frustration burns under your skin. Before you know it, nightmares come to you in the form of dark slate grays.
The next time your eyes open, they’re met with darkness. You’re not sure if the moon decided to stay away or if the clouds had rolled in during your slumber, but regardless your vision is pitch-black. Soft snoring to your right indicates that Hange had made it back and is currently deep in sleep. You vaguely recall hearing them calling out to you when they came back shortly after you fell asleep.
Rolling onto your back, you are greeted with the dim red light from the alarm clock illuminating the ceiling. You imagine it’s quite late in the night considering how refreshed you feel despite the lingering melancholy from dinner.
With a huff, you sit up and swing your legs off the bed. Your bare feet hit the cool, hard floor and you make quick yet quiet work of sneaking out of the bedroom. You know Hange could sleep through anything, but you did not want to suffer on the off-chance they woke up – you were not prepared to face them right now.
After closing the bedroom door, you pad over to the fridge and pull it open. The only drink options were a couple of beers and a handful of caffeinated sodas. You wish you had a cup of Levi’s tea in your hands, but instead you opt for water from the filtered pitcher. After taking a tentative sip of it, you decide that going back to sleep was not an option for you. You kick yourself for potentially screwing up your sleep schedule for the rest of the trip but that was a problem for future you.
With a cold glass in hand, you step over to the plush couch and sink into it. Grabbing the remote in the other, you turn it on and flinch as you’re met with a loud commercial about an action movie coming out soon. Quickly, you turn the volume down to one and sit still as you listen for any sounds of your roommates – luckily it stays silent. You sigh softly.
You pull over a blanket from the other side of the couch and tuck yourself in. You let your mind wander for a bit as a random movie starts to play, the low volume buzzing in the background. Thankfully, your thoughts stay away from Levi. That is, until you watch as a teacup is placed down on the glass coffee table in front of you with a clink as well as delicate fingers pulling away from the handle.
Blinking the glassiness from your vision, your eyes trail up the muscular arm that belongs to a weary-eyed Levi. His gaze shifts away quickly as he lowers himself on the other side of the couch as far as possible from you. He lifts his own teacup to his lips and takes a small sip, eyes forward on the movie ahead.
He doesn’t say anything to you, which you’re not certain if you should be grateful for, or annoyed. You were thinking about wanting some of his tea earlier, but now that it’s here, you’re torn between indulging him or not. As your eyes narrow on the steam that rises off the amber liquid, Levi pipes up finally.
“I didn’t poison it, if that’s what you’re wondering.” He mumbles. You flicker your eyes over to him, but his gaze stays glued to the TV in front.
You let out a soft huff and reach for it, taking the handle in between two fingers and pulling it up to your mouth. Upon the first sip, you withhold a sigh of content. Levi always knew how to make a mean cup of tea. But you won’t say that to him right now. You’re still fuming, tea or no. With that thought, you down it the best you can despite the scorching heat of it as it burns itself down to the pit of your stomach.
You stand when you’ve finished, placing the cup back onto the saucer and then turning around to fold the blanket back up. The space is turning tense by the second and you don’t want to deal with this right now. After placing the blanket on the armrest, you reach down to grab your tea set as well as Levi’s, but his hand stops you as his fingers close around your wrist once again.
“Stay. Please? I want to talk.” You side eye him, noting the nervousness in his eyes. If it wasn’t for that, you would have stormed off. For once, it seems Levi is ready to talk, and whether you were ready or not, you needed to listen.
Setting the saucers back down, you sit on the other side of the couch again, facing him with your arms placed over your chest. Only now do you realize you’re still in a nightgown that barely covers your ass and no bra. Trying to be natural about it, you grab the pillow that sits in the middle of the cushion and pull it to your chest to cover up.
“Are you having trouble sleeping?” He rubs the back of his neck as he watches you. His anxiety looks like it’s about to overflow.
‘Is that really all you want to talk about? Small talk?’
“No! Of course not.” He grumbles. He mirrors you, folding his arms across his chest. He’s getting defensive again.
‘Then what do you want?’ You click your tongue in annoyance.
“I don’t know wha-…” He falters.
‘You do know what you want. You just won’t say it.’
“It’s not that simple.”
‘But you know, don’t you? What is holding you back? What is making this so difficult for you to talk to me?’ Your signs come out more forceful than you meant.
His arms fall into his lap as his focus darts to the tv off to the side. You eye him warily and purse your lips while you wait for him to continue, which he does after sighing heavily in frustration.
“I’m afraid, okay? I’ve never felt so conflicted about stuff like this before. But I’m sorry I’ve been ignoring you all day. It wasn’t my intention to hurt you, I just didn’t know how to face you. Or what to even say to you.”
“I’m sorry.” he says quietly, shifting his gaze back to your face.
The look in his eyes is chock-full of anxiety and panic. Your fingers are flying before you can stop them. The strong walls of anger you had put up for protection start crumbling away, making room for disappointment as well as regret for making him feel this way.
‘I shouldn’t have kissed you, I’m sorry to have caused you so much strife.’ You bite the inside of your cheek.
Levi scoffs at that, his gray eyes cutting over to you, narrowing. He doesn’t say anything right away, instead using this moment to shift on the couch until his knees are against his chest as he faces you a couple feet away.
“Don’t be sorry.” He whispers finally, dark eyes piercing into yours.
‘You’ve been brushing me off all day. It’s because I kissed you when I shouldn’t have. You hate me. And you regret it even now.’ You feel the tears from earlier start to well again, but you refuse to let them spill in front of Levi.
“Why would I hate you?”
‘I just feel like I ruined our friendship with my actions, and you wouldn’t talk to me about it so I also feel like you want nothing to do with me because of it.’
“I don’t hate you.” He mutters, eyes shifting away before jumping back to yours. “I could never hate you.”
‘Then why won't you talk to me?’
Levi gets up abruptly and starts pacing back and forth in front of you with his shaky fingers raking through his hair. The anxiety radiating off him is palpable.
“It’s hard to put into words.” Levi says simply. A scowl appears as he pinches the bridge of his nose between fingers. He continues to pace, eyes half closed as he mutters to himself. You hear something about ‘not being used to this’ and ‘being blindsided’.
You lean forward and grab his pant leg with tight fingers. His sweatpants’ waistband slides down his hip from the sudden force of your grip, immobilizing him unless he wanted them pulled down any further. His steely eyes snap to your troubled expression and he softens immediately, hands dropping to his sides.
‘Just try.’ You give him your best pleading eyes, bottom lip jutting out as far as it can go.
Levi side eyes you as you hold him in place, his lips pinched into a thin line. He opens his mouth as he attempts to figure out what he wanted to say next. It takes a few tries but eventually, he settles on the last thing you’d expected him to say. It’s like his naturally stoic demeanor melts into something completely unrecognizable – not like you were complaining.
“When you kissed me, it was like I understood everything and nothing at the same time. I was so confused.” Levi mutters under his breath, sitting back down on the couch but this time on the cushion closest to you. His thigh brushes up against your knees, sending tingles up your spine from the sudden contact.
“Ever since you’ve stumbled back into my life, I couldn’t understand why you were always on my mind. I think I do now.” He continues without missing a beat. “I think I’ve always cherished you in some capacity, just in different stages.” Levi places his face in his hands that were propped up against his knees. After a few seconds, his head turns to you with a familiar expression. The way he looks at you reminds you of the little boy next door all those years ago.
“Leeeeeviii!!” You yell as you bound down the front steps without a care in the world. Your brother and Levi currently sit on the lawn, messing around with their action figures who were currently in a heated battle. In your excitement, you completely miss the bottom step and stumble down onto your hands and knees, rough concrete digging into your skin.
The wails that come out of you are loud enough that the dogs across the street start barking. A pair of hands are on you in an instant, helping to pull you up and onto the bottom step that had caused you so much trouble in the first place.
“I’ll go get some bandages.” Your brother says in a panic, running up the stairs and back in the house you had just come out of.
“You’re okay, it’s just some scratches.” You look up through blurry lashes to see Levi staring at your bleeding knees. You’re not going to bleed out, but crimson is trickling down your legs and it’s enough to make you cry harder.
Levi takes your little hands into his slightly bigger ones and inspects them. He brushes off the small gravel that had embedded itself into your skin, his tongue stuck between his teeth in focus. You observe him as best as you can despite the salty water obscuring your vision. Levi’s eyelashes flutter across his cheeks as he turns your hands over to get a better look at them.
“Not cut, just a little dirty. Nothing that can’t be fixed.” He says softly to you. Blue-gray eyes look up into yours and you realize you stopped crying. He offers you a lopsided grin as he squeezes your hand a few times.
“See? Not broken. You’ll be okay.”
He was always so calm with you. You shoot him a toothy grin while squeezing his hand back a few times. So calm. So safe.
“Levi, I’m never letting you go.”
You laugh at the sudden memory that flashes before your vision. You’re grateful for Levi in many ways, despite the fact he made you mad sometimes. Memory recovery was one of the reasons why. Levi’s eyes widen at your sudden outburst.
“What?”
‘Remember when I ate shit outside of my house when we were kids?’
He hesitates as he thinks.
“Which time?” His lips twitch at his comment and you realize it probably wasn’t the first time you had fallen. You appreciate your resilient nature as a kid, taking note of the small scars that probably decorated your knees even to this day.
‘Levi, I think there’s always been a part of me that’s always felt safe with you. And, I think having a future without you in it, no matter what that means, isn’t something I want to see. So, I think that’s why I was so torn up about this. The idea of you leaving just tears me apart.’
Levi sits up at your confession, staring at you in curiosity. There’s a new look of assurance on his face as he eyes you. A pink flush creeps up his neck and into his cheekbones as he focuses back on the colorful screen ahead.
“I don’t have any plans to leave.” He mutters.
There’s more silence, only cut up by the voices on the television and distant crashing of waves from down below. You watch him closely as he blinks slowly, propping his chin up in both arms that sit against his thighs. Before you can sign again, he speaks softly.
“I don’t regret it.” He side-eyes you, as if he were afraid to face you for such a statement.
‘What do you mean you don’t regret it?’
“It means I don’t regret that you kissed me.”
‘Did you want me to kiss you?’
Silence.
“You should probably get some sleep. I’m sure tomorrow will be just as exhausting. We can talk more then.” Levi says quietly, changing the subject.
You narrow your eyes at him, annoyed he would close up after so much progress. But then a yawn so big escapes your mouth and you shove your face into the pillow you were still hugging until it’s done. When you look back up, you see Levi watching you in amusement before his expression changes into indifference quickly. Maybe this would be best saved for the next day when you were both awake.
‘What about you?’
“I don’t sleep much, you know that. I’ll be okay.” He shrugs his shoulders as he gets up from the sofa. He reaches for the remote and turns off the tv then carefully places it back on the coffee table. Then he turns around to offer you a hand which you take, still hugging the pillow to your chest. He raises an eyebrow at that but turns on his heel to head to his bedroom. With a soft sigh, you place the pillow back and follow him down the hallway to your room.
The need to figure out what was going through his mind was strong, but your exhaustion hits harder. As you pass the kitchen, you note the time was about to hit five in the morning which means you have been up for a while. Despite the amount of sleep from earlier, you feel your body giving in to the heaviness of fatigue – no doubt a consequence of having such a taxing day.
You watch as Levi stops outside of his door, right hand gripping the doorknob in white knuckles. As you pass him, you reach over and place your hand on top of his. When his eyes fall on you, you offer a small smile.
‘What’s wrong?’
Before you can pull away, Levi says your name and stares over at you with longing.
“What am I to you?”
With shaky hands, you sign back, ‘What would you like to be, Levi?’ Adrenaline courses through your veins like lava at the sudden question.
“Yours.” It’s so soft, barely audible. And yet so full of conviction.
Levi looks down at your lips quickly before jumping back up to your eyes. In a swift motion, he releases the doorknob and grabs your hand, pulling you in closer to him with sudden force. His gaze is as firm as the grip on you, holding you in place. When he speaks again, his words come out measured.
“You’re right, I do know what I want. My answer is yours. I want to be yours.”
Your eyes widen at the sudden confession, and you stare at him with your lips parted in surprise. As if time slowed down, just like in the elevator, Levi tilts your chin in his direction - pinching it gently between his thumb and index finger. He leans in slowly, his eyes staring into yours as he wavers inches away. Levi is so close to you that his hot breath hits your face, and you smell hints of his black tea and traces of pine.
“And I want to kiss you. Is that okay?” You nod, dazed by his proximity.
Carefully, his mouth meets yours and you instantly distinguish the difference between this kiss and the one in the elevator. This one is hesitant, nervous. But traces of ravenous hunger linger as an aftertaste.
That same heat blazes from your face all the way down to your toes. Levi’s fingers move from your chin to right under your jaw, tilting your face into him even more. After a moment, he breaks away granting you a moment to catch your breath. His face is still inches from yours, gray eyes fluttering closed as your forehead rests against his. Your name tumbles out of his mouth, almost like a beg.
“I need to know.” He pulls away from you, the air around you instantly turning cold from the lack of his presence. “Will you let me?”
‘Let you what, Levi?’ You know what he wants, but you just want to hear him say it again. And again and again and again.
“Let me be yours.” Your smile would have blinded the whole world.
‘Mine.’
He leans in again, cupping your whole face in his calloused hand and locking his lips back over yours. The hunger intensifies just like the buzzing throughout your whole system. You open your mouth slightly to let his tongue in to explore and it does, eliciting a quiet moan from you. You swear you hear Levi growl in response. Oh, how touch starved you two were for each other.
As if in sync, Levi opens the bedroom door and you both stumble still lip-locked into his room. He pushes you up against the door, shutting it behind you. If you weren’t so lost in the kiss, you would have been worried by how loud the slam must have been. Levi presses up against you more, sandwiching you between the heat of his body and the cool wooden door behind you. You already feel how hard he is under his sweatpants.
You’re more inexperienced than most so there’s hesitation in your kiss – something Levi picks up on quickly. He pulls away but leaves his hands on your face as he looks at you with apprehension.
“We don’t have to do anything you don’t want to tonight.” He whispers to you. His voice is as sincere as it always is, albeit husky. You place a hand over his that sits on your face, leaning into it as you do before signing back.
‘I want all of you.’ You offer a loving smile, wide and full of adoration for the man in front of you. Levi’s eyes bounce back and forth between yours as if searching for something. He finds nothing but pure truth.
Levi’s lips crash back onto yours, careful but just as heated. As his marred lips leave and make their way down your neck, one of your hands slides up his chest to his undercut until your fingers find what they were looking for, tangling in his raven hair.
The moment you feel his teeth pinch your soft skin, another moan comes out louder than before. Having him pressed up against you like that, the outline of his cock pressing into your stomach, you start to feel your patience slowly unraveling.
Your nervousness flies out the window. This was Levi, you had no reason to worry. Levi is safe to you. He would take care of you as he always does. And you would do the same. The thought makes you smile up at the ceiling. Before you know it, your hands push against Levi’s soft skin, and he pulls away quickly. Worry pools into his dark eyes as he watches you carefully.
“Is everything okay?” He murmurs hoarsely.
Instead of signing back, you force him to step back towards the bed with your palm pressed against his chest until the back of his knees hit the edges of the mattress. The force alone makes him lurch back so that he falls back onto the soft duvet, catching himself on his hands so that he’s sitting up.
In a swift motion, you straddle his hips, and your lips find solace on his mouth yet again. You don’t hesitate to push your tongue through to taste him again, wrapping your arms around his neck and pressing yourself into him more.
You don’t mean to, but you find your hips grinding on to him, the only barriers between your already soaked self and Levi being the clothes you wish were off. The pressure and friction against your very sensitive core make you pull away for breath. Levi’s soft grunts are music to your ears and his lips start trailing back down your neck, his teeth finding purchase in your soft skin yet again. His fingers slide up your back, pulling your night dress up with it.
Then a groan comes out of his clenched teeth, full of frustration.
Levi pulls away again and stares up at you with heavy-lidded eyes full of impatience. You note that pink flush of his that you love so much, deeper in color and painting across his cheeks. As you stare down at him, you come to love this version of Levi and you want nothing but to see his face contort at the way you grinded into him. But he places his hands on your hips to keep you still, much to your dismay. You watch him carefully as he speaks, his voice husky.
“I-uh. I want this, I do. But we need to be safe. And I didn’t bri-“ He averts his gaze, staring at the corner of the bed. You were so lost in the exhilaration of it all, you didn’t think about it. A thick appreciation for him crashes over you because his cautious nature, even if it did slightly kill the heat of the moment.
‘Give me a second. I can help with this. Stay here.’ You give him a chaste kiss before sliding off his lap and out the door quickly. You tiptoe your way back to your room, making sure the only sounds that can be heard are the clock ticking on the wall and the muffled continuous crashing of waves just outside.
When you slip into your room, you see Hange flat on their back with their hair tousled everywhere. Soft snores escape their lips, a telltale sign they are out like a light. Hange wasn’t promiscuous in the slightest, but they weren’t closed minded either. And with that, it meant they stayed prepared.
You creep over to their unorganized suitcase where clothes were strewn all over the place. Reaching into the top compartment, your fingers feel the sharp edges of a foil package and slip it out. You blush to yourself as you think back to Levi’s outline as you make sure it’s the right size.
A snort from behind you makes you freeze in place, breath hitched as you sit crouching in silence. A moment passes. Another minute. Hange’s snores fill the room again and you let loose your held breath, shoulders sagging. You’re sure this conversation would come up again later, but you didn’t want to deal with it right now. Especially with Levi waiting for you.
It takes you next to no time to slip out of your room and back into Levi’s, closing his door with a soft click. Turning around, you show him the condom in between pinched fingers and smile widely to Levi who was still sitting on the edge of the bed for you.
“Did you come prepared?” He raises an eyebrow at the glittering foil.
‘No, but Hange do-‘
“I don’t need to know any more.” Levi blurts out, hands up in defeat. A silent laugh shakes your shoulders as you make your way back over to him. You fling the package onto the bed before straddling him again, noting how hard he was underneath you still.
‘Now where were we?’ You sign with a small smile. Levi smirks and places his hand against your cheek, his thumb tracing your bottom lip gently. You playfully nip at him, and he huffs in amusement.
“You’re breathtakingly beautiful, you know that?” He asks you softly before pulling your face into his and locking his lips on yours. It’s a saccharine-laced kiss. His hands find your hips again, lowering until they are fully on your ass, and they squeeze. A squeak escapes into his mouth as he does, and it just makes his grip on your skin tighter.
Pulling away, you grip his t-shirt from the bottom and start tugging it up. Levi leans back so you can pull it up and over his head, discarding it on the bed next to him. Your hands trail down his toned chest and abs, his skin burning under your touch. It’s soft despite the hard muscles underneath them. Your mouth finds his again as your hands explore, not hesitating to slip your tongue into Levi’s already parted lips.
Your hands find their way back in his hair, fingers entwining through the fine strands. You can’t help it – you tug gently, and a small whine comes out of his pouty lips as he’s pulled away from your mouth. Something inside you burns and again you feel your razor thin patience cutting at you.
As if Levi reads your mind, he wraps an arm around your back while leaving his other hand cupping your ass and stands up effortlessly. In a mere moment, he turns around with you in his strong arms and then gently tosses you on to the bed. A soft laugh escapes you as you land. Everything around you smells like Levi.
Levi stands at the foot of the bed and stares down at you ravenously, a look you don’t think you’ve ever seen on anyone outside of the movies on your television screen. You sit up on your elbows and watch as he gets on the bed and slowly makes his way on top of you. He meets your lips with his own as his body hovers over yours, his fingers lightly trailing up your arms resulting in goosebumps following in their wake.
Slowly, you lie back down flush to the mattress, his knees digging into the sheets on either side of your thighs. Levi’s lips start to slide down your jaw which gives you some space to breathe but your breaths quickly turn into soft whimpers as his fingers lightly trace across your lower abdomen. His other hand snakes around the back of your neck, supporting it as he starts planting more soft kisses down it.
“You can stop me at any time, okay?” Levi whispers, his hot breath tickling your neck. You nod, only wishing you had your voice to say his name and tell him you wanted him. As long as he was with you, you would always want him.
Levi’s hand that was teasing your waist makes its way back up to the lacy lining that adorns the edge of your nightdress, long fingers tugging down the thin fabric that holds your breasts in place. You’re glad Levi isn’t watching your face because you are multiple shades of embarrassment.
But Levi doesn’t say anything, instead he takes a breast in hand and massages it gently as his kisses start trailing down past your collarbone. Before you know it, his soft lips clamp around your already very sensitive nipple, eliciting a loud moan from you. You can’t help but dig your nails into the firm muscles of his back in response, dragging them down as Levi bites down gently. An exhale of hot air blows out of Levi’s mouth against your skin when you do that, a small grunt escaping with it.
You feel the absence of his lips immediately as his lips leave and the wetness left behind leaves your skin defenseless against the cool air. Levi softly kisses back up your sternum then pulls away, leaning forward on both hands that now sit on each side of your face. His tousled hair falls forward, creating shadows across his face as he stares down with that same hungry look, only this time it’s tinted with pure amazement.
“Still okay?” He whispers down to you.
You blink up at him and swallow hard. You were more than okay but as always, your words fail you. Instead, you nod and the hands that once dragged down his back are now trailing down his chest again. The feeling of his skin against yours sends electricity through your whole body, and you want more. You need more. Your hands flatten against right above his rapidly beating heart as you do your best to give him a look that conveys ‘more’.
“I’ve got you.” Those were the words he had muttered down to you the day before as you fell asleep in his arms on the beach. It wasn’t just cherishment that he held for you; it was deeper than that. Hange’s words from earlier flit through your mind, only briefly. How could you not have fully noticed until now?
He leans down and places his lips back on yours, soft and sweet. As your lips lock on to his, you feel his feather light touch trace back down to the elastic band of your underwear. But instead of teasing you like he had before, you feel his fingers dip under the cloth and further down to…
Any other thoughts racing through your mind cease to exist as his delicate fingers slide down your slick folds. You don’t mean to moan as loud as you do and fortunately Levi’s mouth muffles it for you. He hums in response to your reactions, smiling into the kiss.
Levi’s lips graze back down to just under your ear as his fingers rub small circles around your clit eliciting more moans from you. Your labored breaths fill the space as the white-hot heat from his touch reverberates throughout your whole body, tingling down to the tips of your toes. He whispers your name under a heavy breath, mutterings of how beautiful you are to him floating up to your ear. All sweet words mirror the moans you made.
You reach down to Levi’s hardened bulge that currently fights against the stretched fabric of his joggers. Your fingers close around him as much as they can through the thick cloth. Upon contact, Levi’s breath hitches. You give him a gentle squeeze resulting in a guttural groan that comes through his clenched teeth.
In response, his touch burns deep into your core as he carefully pushes a digit into your warm entrance, the palm of his hand applying pressure onto your swollen clit as he does. His movements are gentle as he pumps it in and out slowly, and you feel his finger curving up into a spot so good your toes curl. The euphoria turns into building heat, and you know what’s about to happen - but you wanted more. You wanted him now more than ever and this was not enough. More, more, more.
A soft whine comes out of you as your fingers tighten around him. A light huff tickles against your skin – Levi’s way of chuckling.
“Are you sure you’re ready?” He mumbles, his lips finding your earlobe and nipping at it gently. Reaching over with your other hand, you place your hand against his cheek and pull him up to you, planting your lips right onto his. It’s a hungry kiss, one conveying you were ready for him. You love him, you want him. You need him.
With that, Levi withdraws his hand and slides himself off you and the bed. You sit up and watch as he tugs down his pants along with his boxers. You knew what was coming and yet you couldn’t stop the blood rushing to your cheeks in shy embarrassment. You look away, staring at the ceiling as you hear Levi pick his clothes up including the shirt you threw on the bed, and then place them neatly on the dresser behind him. Your name quietly tumbles out his lips for your attention.
When you look up at him, you see him offering a hand to you. Your eyes flicker down for a mere second before going back up to Levi’s soft gaze. You feel as if you could faint on the spot.
Instead, you push yourself closer to the edge of the bed and take Levi’s hand. In a delicate flourish, you’re in his arms again and he pulls you in for another deep, lingering kiss. His fingers bunch at the bottom of your night dress and start lifting it up. You let him, pulling away enough so he can get the soft fabric up and over your head. He folds it and turns to place it next to his pants. When he circles back on you, he takes a moment to observe your half-naked self.
Being in your thin bathing suit was one thing, but to be standing there as the cool air conditioning drifted across your unprotected self was in a whole other universe. You shift your weight awkwardly and twist your arms together as you avert your gaze to the piled-on dresser.
Levi steps closer to you and takes both of your arms in a gentle grip and pulls them away from each other so that you’re exposed to him. You force your gaze on him despite how nervous you were to be in front of him. Levi’s dark eyes trail down your body but not in an ogling kind of way – he watches you with wonder.
“You’re just so beautiful. Every part of you.” He releases your arms, and his hands are back on you, sliding down your waist and landing on your hips. His fingers leave a trail of tingles. “I want you, all of you. If you’ll have me. Is that okay?” He whispers to you, pulling you by the hips into him. The length of his hardened self presses against your bare stomach as he does.
You sign that same simple word, ‘Mine’.
With that, Levi gently pushes you down into the bed with a hard kiss, leaning into you until your back is pressed against the mattress. He loops his fingers into the sides of your panties and tugs them down your legs, pulling away from you yet again to place them next to the rest of the discarded clothes. At that moment, he takes the time to rip a corner off the metallic package with his teeth, the foil discarded onto the dresser once done.
He grabs your hips again, this time pulling you flush to the edge of the bed as he stands at the foot of it. His hand makes its way to your thigh and his perfectly trimmed nails press into your soft skin as he holds you close. The tip of his cock teases your entrance and if you had a voice, you would have begged for it. As usual, you didn’t have to.
Levi leans down to you and kisses you slowly, teeth brushing against your swollen bottom lip. He places his other hand on the bed next to your head, using it to keep himself propped up. His hair hangs low as he hovers, already moist with sweat from the proximity and building body heat between the two of you. You use one hand to grip his forearm while the other hand slides up the back of his head and into his sweaty hair, fingers digging into his scalp. As the kiss deepens, so do his movements into you.
Levi slides himself in gently, using his hold on your thigh to control his speed. He lifts your leg up against his hip for a better angle but the sharp gasp from you stops Levi in his tracks. He stays there, feeling your warm walls hugging tightly around him.
He pulls away from the kiss and hovers over you again, looking down into your eyes with worry. It's been a while since you have been touched like this, let alone this intimate. You don’t think you’ve ever felt this loved. Levi makes this all so easy despite the anxious knot in your chest. You realize it isn’t just this that he makes easy, though. It’s everything around you. Every issue, every solution.
You imagine you’re looking at him just the same, a small smile etching into your flushed and hot face. Before he can ask again, you move your hand up and under his fingers that digs into the bed next to you. Lacing your fingers in with his, you squeeze his hand a few times.
A way to say you were okay and that you trusted him. And always would.
He looks down at you curiously but then realization dawns on him. His concern washes away to reveal his own version of adoration for you. It’s one of your favorite expressions on him by far.
In a breathless moan, Levi pushes himself all the way in. He presses his lips onto yours, muffling your moans that rise in volume as he slowly rocks into you. The hand he had on your thigh tightens as he pulls you into him more, quickening his pace slightly. The new angle hits a spot that almost puts you at the brink of finishing right then and there.
Levi lets go of your hand and moves his arm under your neck again, giving him the opportunity to trail his now sloppy kisses and teeth down it. Those razor-sharp teeth sink into your skin as one of his thrusts hit simultaneously. You bite into the back of your hand to keep yourself from wailing out and waking the rest of your roommates. The other hand that now sits against his sweaty chest digs into his skin, burying deeper with every thrust. It feels as if every part of your body burns like wildfire from his touch. Your name comes out in a groan this time, husky and deep.
“God, you’re fucking beautiful. You feel so good.” He buries his face into your collarbone as he moans your name again, shakily.
Levi thrusts soon become clumsy, feeling him slam into you inconsistently and with every hit comes more pressure against your clit. Heat builds into your core, the same as before. You’re pulling at his hair, in an attempt to warn him you were close. Throaty curses leave his lips as you both feel each other tense up.
In an instant, it’s like the world crumbles around you as you hit your limit. The walls surrounding Levi clenches as each wave of pleasure rolls through your whole system. Your orgasm sends Levi over the edge and in one deep thrust of his hips, you feel his body shudder as his moan almost turns into a whine. His teeth bite into you again as he rides through his own climax, filling up the condom within you.
Levi releases your leg and lets it fall gently against the bed before collapsing on top of you. He uses an arm to keep himself propped up enough to not suffocate you with his body weight. You focus on the heavy panting emanating from the both of you as you come down from your high. His heart beats in sync with your own against as he lays on top of you, digging his face into the crook of your neck.
You wrap your arms around his head and hold him close, despite the heat and sticky sweat between your bodies. Levi nuzzles his nose into sweaty soft skin and chuckles, low and hoarse. You both continue to lay like that until the breathing slows down to a normal pace. The next time he speaks, his voice is so soft and barely audible that you almost miss it.
“I love you too.”
☾ Previous Chapter: June - Part 3 ☾ Next Chapter: June - Part 5 [Final]
#Skys blog recovery#this is ported from my old fandom blog chaotic-on-main#I did not steal these I swear lol they’re mine#attack on titan#attack on titan fanfiction#shingeki no kyojin#shingeki no kyojin fanfiction#levi ackerman#levi ackerman fanfiction#fanfiction#fluff#levi x reader#levi ackerman x reader#erwin smith#hange zoe#levi x fem!reader#aot#aot fanfiction#levi ackerman x you#snk fanfiction#long fic#snk#aot fluff#attack on titan fluff#attack on titan levi#unspoken words#modernau#levi smut#levi ackerman smut#smut
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pssspsps *hands you my skyrim werewolf oc*
(cring lore dump below so my brain becomes normal again)
nirin's my bosmer werewolf dragonborn oc :D!! she's skilled in archery; sneak; and fire magic!
she's selectively mute!! and uses sign language; as well as a (very) limited version of dragon language to those who can understand it; namely paarthurnax; miraak and the greybeards.
she's also feral; an absolutel creacher; lives in the woods; and rarely interacts w/ society;
nirin; or 'nir in' is dragon language for hunt master!! its a name she came up for herself after paarthurnax suggested it. she doesn't actually remember her original name;
i like to think that when the events of the games start; or the moment someone is at the right place at the right time and gets picked to become the 'hero' of the games; they forget their name and a majority of their past life. she still retains her personality; skills and any uhhh;; adverse;; effects of her past!! she just can't remember it! one of these adverse effects being that she's a werewolf (meaning i have to use console commands to make her a werewolf immediately on every playthrough lmao).
as her name suggests she's VERY good at hunting! that's her full time occupation basically lmao. she sometimes visits the drunken huntsman in whiterun to 'sell' her catches, but its rlly just the concerned shopkeepers giving her normal people food and supplies to help her survive.
she has 2 main followers! lydia and miraak.
lydia is her first friend (technically caretaker) in skyrim. i like to think that jarl balgruuf assigned her to nirin out of concern for this Child being the dragonborn and tasked to slay Alduin of all beings, so lydia was tasked at making sure she becomes a well-adjusted person and doesn't bite as much sdfdffdjkl. lydia taught her the basics of reading and writing!! :D they parted ways a bit further into nirin's journey, specifically when she travelled to solstheim
oK SO a BIG part of nirin's character is her struggle w/ her dragonborn identity and the burden of her dragon soul. she 100% rejects the call to adventure, HARD. i hc that the dragon souls a dragonborn absorbs Stays with them in more ways than just making them more powerful; like,, the dragons' personalities, wills and their desire for domination stays with her, with the latter especially getting worse the more dragon souls she absorbs and it certainly doesn't mesh well w/ her werewolf nature fskfs. she comes to paarthurnax often for advice and companionship, but there's only so much he can do, seeing as he only has one (1) dragon soul and never interacts w/ human society.
this is where miraak comes in!!! :DD i've always thought the fact he's the First Dragonborn is Very cool, and that he can have some very interesting dynamics w/ the Last (nirin)!! like, the fact he's been dragonborn for thousands of years!! has killed MANY dragons before and very skilled w/ using the thu'um for combat!! in her story, miraak acts as nirin's (reluctant) mentor. she initially pulled him out of Apocrypha so he could take her place in defeating Alduin, but because of permanent injuries and a curse inflicted by Hermeaus Mora, he's been locked out of Sovngarde and isn't rlly in peak fighting shape to take on a giant dragon god. so he's stuck trying to make sure the last dragonborn doesn't die before she saves the world fjsflkdsjf.
nirin isn't happy about this, miraak is even mORE disgruntled about this.
in conclusion, nobody is happy in this story except for me >:)
if you've read this far uhhhhhh, ty for listening to my unhinged brainrot rant and also i am sorry fjsdlkfjsldkj
#skyrim#tesblr#skyrim oc#the elder scrolls#oc#help girl i accidentally looked into the tumblr tags for my fave skyrim character (miraak) and briefly got stuck in the tes brainrot#dw this blog won't become a skyrim/tes blog i swear; my brain's just in a silly goofy mood atm
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HEHEHEHEHEHEH OK DIFFERENT REQUEST THIS TIME AND I THINK YOU'LL LIKE THIS ONE MAYBE I DREW THE TR BOYS REALLY BAD AND ALSO AS HORRORS BEYOND HUMAN COMPREHENSION SO UHH DO WHAT U WANT WITH THEM, HERE ARE SOME PROMPTS BUT UHHH YOU CAN HONESTLY DO WHATEVER YOU WANT. LMAO YOU DONT EVEN HAVE TO WRITE ABOUT IT U CAN JUST HAVE THEM
prompt 1: friend gives really short amount of time to draw someone and this is what happens prompt 2: "i felt silly" *sends you a picture of a drawing depicting you as a horrifying being(ran & sanzu) /in pain (koko)/ literal insanity (rindou) ok looveee u and ur work n i hope i made your day again!!!!
Happy to see you again girl!!! But with no offense intended when I opened that drawing I nearly dropped my phone (TR men Eldritch Horror version). Sadly my iFake doesn't support images so I had to manually type
Y'all I based this crack off typical convos with my friends in art (hating on Kafka so bad with my girl Hina) 🤣🤣🤣
MAD DOG: I felt silly
MAD DOG: I know y'all love it don't lie
RIN RIN: This is why I keep the chat muted
MAD DOG: You wound me, I worked so hard!
MIKEY KING: I've seen kindergartens do better
MAD DOG: Not you too Mikey!!!!
SUGAR KOKO: What just happened
All I see are exclamation marks and that's not good
RIN RIN: Scroll up for yet another disaster by Sanzu
SUGAR KOKO: Wtf
I wish I didn't
Wait my eyes aren't that small
RIN RIN: Are you even sure you want my eyes
SUGAR KOKO: Can I not be in the drawing at all
MIKEY KING: Agreed
If I see that again there go all of your taiyaki rights
MAD DOG: Oh look who's being a kindergartener now
SUGAR KOKO: Mikey you never gave a single taiyaki before
RIN RIN: Fr
No difference
MIKEY KING: How do you know I wasn't planning to???
MAD DOG: Not even for me you wouldn't
MIKEY KING: Sanzu after that drawing you can't even say even because no way
MAD DOG: Bullying is no no
RIN RIN: Wym bullying
SUGAR KOKO: Yeah it's truth
I literally look so in pain and after seeing it I am
RIN RIN: I look like a literal insane psychopathic murderer from a max security prison
SUGAR KOKO: Sounds familiar
I know!
Sanzu Haruchiyo
RIN RIN: Sanzu Haruchiyo
MIKEY KING: Sanzu Haruchiyo
MAD DOG: WHY ARE ALL OF YOU GANGING UP ON ME
DON'T ACT LIKE YOU GUYS AREN'T PSYCHOTIC MURDERERS
RIN RIN: Just you actually
MAD DOG: RAN WHERE ARE YOU BACK ME UP RN IM SOBBING
SUGAR KOKO: you're on your own pal
RIN RIN: he's asleep again
HOTTER HAITANI: now I'm awake and ready to bless all of you with my presence!
RIN RIN: I just cringed so hard
SUGAR KOKO: Ew what the actual hell
Ykw go back to sleep
MAD DOG: RAN MY FRIEND
Does my drawing flatter us all or what
RIN RIN: Ran I will mess up your dye job so bad
MAD DOG: Don't listen to the unbelievers!
HOTTER HAITANI: Of course not
Lemme see lemme see
SUGAR KOKO: oh god
MIKEY KING: I'm leaving
MAD DOG: you're still here?
HOTTER HAITANI: SANZU MY FRIEND
IT'S ABSOLUTELY MARVELLOUS
I LOVE RINDOU
I'M FRAMING IT ON THE FRIDGE
MAD DOG: I KNEW IT
I ALWAYS KNEW I WAS SPECIAL
I KNEW I WAS THE NEXT PICASSO
RIN RIN: the both of you
SUGAR KOKO: stfu Annabelle
You too Pinky
MIKEY KING: you are now my number two Koko
#sanzuyaps#tokyo revengers#tokyo rev#bonten#crack fic#sanzu Haruchiyo#ran haitani#mikey sano#rindou haitani#hajime kokonoi
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hihi!!! hru today? /nf, curious
uhhh soooo did you know that . there's a headcanon that vaporeon can melt on a wim since they're like more than half water? /info, pos, friendly tone
ALSO I have another question out of curiosity: does Ula like a specific type of Victorian aesthetic or architecture? /also nf and curious
We're doing.. Eh. Really upset at my mother right now. /lh, nav
I think we've heard of that headcanon! I don't think it applies to my vaporeon kintype however because I'm actually a fluffy vaporeon for some reason ^^ /lh, friendly tone
Ula likes Victorian Gothic! We also discovered that he likes Romanian architecture (or, well, she likes seeing the photos my Romanian friend sends us of buildings in the country). Mainly darker, mute colors, sometimes gold and red.
- YP
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