#yesterday's which involved the other person telling me that she

[the-everqueen]

but seriously it's surprising how often ppl react inappropriately to me mentioning that i'm not out to my family

[augustinewrites]

yesterday afternoon - after an unsuccessful coffee shop date - you’d decided that dating sucked. it was much too awkward and formal and not at all like it was in the movies, putting too much pressure on the people involved.

last night - after watching shoko flirt her way into free drinks - you’d been tipsy enough to take her advice. 

casual sex! it doesn't have to be with a stranger, just pick someone you know. someone you’re sure you won't fall in love with.

this morning you’d woken up to find gojo laying in bed next to you.

you lay shoulder to shoulder with the one person you should not have picked, staring up at the ceiling, waiting for the other person to speak. 

“did we really–” 

“three times,” satoru confirms happily, rolling onto his side to grin down at you. “i'm surprised we didn't do this sooner, really. our sexual tension has always been off the charts.”

when he leans in to kiss you, his lips meet your palm as your expression wrinkles. “don’t get familiar.”

“we’re naked together in bed– we slept together in more than the literal sense. can’t get more familiar than that.” 

“and this never happen again,” you promise, refusing to look at him. 

“why? because you’re afraid you’ll fall in love with me? it’s okay to admit it. i'm extremely lovable.” 

you’ve seen the way girls fawn over him. how they swoon over his pretty eyes and confident smile. he’s satoru gojo. a legend amongst jujutsu society. you’re no one in comparison, not a user of an otherworldly cursed technique, not from a major clan. 

people like him don’t fall for people like you. you’re afraid of rejection, afraid of being hurt. 

“we’re friends,” you tell him honestly. “i don’t want to risk ruining our friendship over something like this.” 

he tilts his head as your look at him. “shoko told you to try casual sex, didn't she? why not with me?”

“she told you?” you groan, dragging a hand down your face and making a mental note to never ask your roommate for advice for anything ever again. 

“hey, look at me,” he urges, grasping your hand. you do as he says, meeting his earnest gaze. “i can be casual and chill, it’s not like i have a huge crush on you or anything.” 

it’s so hard to say no to him. you really wish you could.  

“i’ll think about it,” you tell him, rolling your eyes when he fist pumps. “but you need to go home before shoko sees you.” 

but you’re dealing with satoru gojo, who almost never does what he’s told. “you’re not getting rid of me that easily. come here.”

he winds an arm around you, pulli my you in so you’re snug against his chest. explicit memories of last night flash through your mind, sending heat through your veins.

 “i can’t.” you tell him (though you’re mostly reminding yourself.) this is insane— satoru, what are you—”

you’re cut off when he shushes you, whispering let’s sleep in for a little while longer. 

he starts to drift off again as you struggle to escape his grasp, but your efforts are futile. even on the throes of sleep, satoru is stronger than you. 

so you give up, resigning yourself to a few more minutes of…cuddling. shoko isn’t a morning person anyways.

after a minute, you find it's not entirely awful. it’s a purely physical reaction. gojo is good looking, even with his hair mussed with sleep and his mouth hanging open. because you know that under the softness of his skin lays defined muscle, and spending the morning in his nicely toned arms isn’t the worst thing in the world. 

(it’s purely physical, is what your head tries to convince your heart, which is beating a little faster than usual.)

a very soft, content sigh slips past your lips. 

then, shoko knocks on your door. 

“hey! don’t tell me you’re too hungover for grocery shopping.” 

“shit!” you whisper harshly, shoving him away from you. “she cannot see you in here.” 

“afraid you’ll have to share?” he teases, narrowly avoiding being hit with a pillow. “okay, okay! where do you want me?”

“closet!” you instruct, scrambling my around the room to make sure none of his clothes are lying around. you thrust them into his hands, pushing him into your closet. 

he catches the door before you can close it, smiling down at you. “aren’t you glad we’re doing this?”

you shove him inside, slamming the door shut just ask shoko bursts into the room.

“hey,” you greet, trying your best to appear casual as you lean against the door. your heart beats in your throat, as she squints at you, then lets her gaze sweep across the room.

“did you bring someone home last night?”

“no.”

she looks at you. really looks at you, you think. 

“okay,” she finally says, though you can’t tell if she believes you. “i just– i thought i saw you leave with gojo. suguru said you two were flirting all night.”

“gojo and i?” you try to laugh, but it comes out a little strained. “never in a million years.”

shoko only shrugs, and you let yourself relax when she turns to leave…

…only for her to turn around once more, leaning the the doorframe. “well if you really don't like him, just let him down easy, alright? suguru told me he has a huge crush on you.” 

wait–

“gojo?”

you hear a sharp inhale through the door. 

“yeah,” she nods. “you really couldn't tell?”

gojo…has a crush on you. it takes a few seconds to truly sink in. “i had no idea.” 

“of course you didn't. he’s definitely got a really weird way of showing it.”

she turns to leave for real this time, but you wait a couple extra seconds before opening your closet, finding a wide eyed, blushing satoru staring at you. 

you can't help but laugh. at his expression, at shoko’s revelation, at this entire situation.

dating sucks, but maybe it won’t be that bad if it’s with him.

[littlespoonevan]

I watched the first three seasons of 911 back when that was all that had aired and just didn’t keep watching after the break between seasons for whatever reason. I also didn’t really get buddie, I just thought it was a beautiful friendship. I’m now on a rewatch and just got to the end of season 4 and boy am I all in, Buck’s reaction to Eddie getting shot and the aftermath really made me get it. Anyway, I was wondering if you have any fic recs for a buddie newbie? I’m probably gonna speed through the rest of the show in a few days and need something else to occupy me hahah

hey bud, welcome back to the world of 911!! 🥰 okay so i have some previous fic recs that i've posted here and i also have 489 bookmarks on ao3 which you can have a scroll through here (i only ever bookmark something for rereading or reccing purposes so can confirm i've read and loved them all)

but i'll do my best to make a somewhat cohesive list below of some of my personal faves. i have no doubt i'll probably leave some out accidentally but they'll definitely be in my bookmarks so 100% check those out too!! ❤️

The Nearness of You by��allisonRW96 / @homerforsure

Eddie reassured himself that he could do this. Other teams coming in were probably going to be staying at the same hotel in the same double rooms and it was very possible that none of them were going to be having sex. Or even lying awake at night thinking about it. Or: Buck and Eddie go on a work trip.

Leave the Light On (I'll Be Coming Home) by HMSLusitania / @hmslusitania

“We’re here for our grandson,” Helena says. “Chris is still sleeping,” Buck says. “I meant, we’re here to take him back to Texas,” Helena clarifies. “Yeah,” Buck says. He’s too tired, way too tired to be tactful. “Over my dead body.” -- An accident on a call leaves Buck with custody of Chris after Eddie is... missing presumed. While they navigate their new family circumstances -- and fight to stay together, despite Eddie's parents' best efforts -- a John Doe wakes up in a coma ward with no memory of his own life beyond the knowledge he has a son named Christopher and, somehow, he needs to get home.

To Build a Home We Deconstruct Our Rituals by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels /@letmetellyouaboutmyfeels

After the shooting, Eddie realizes he needs to put some things in place. Like who will get his assets if he dies. Who will speak for him if he ends up in a coma. What might happen if his family contests Buck's guardianship. Luckily, he's got a simple easy-peasy solution that won't result in insanity, catastrophe, or heartbreak: Marry Buck.

standing on the brink of emptiness by woodchoc_magnum / @woodchoc-magnum

In which Eddie is struggling in the aftermath of being shot, learning how to take care of himself and realising he's in love with Buck; and Buck is dating Taylor, taking care of Eddie and Christopher and trying to figure out why he's so goddamn confused about everything.

across our great divide (a glorious sunrise) by catchingpapermoons 

“We’re working on it,” Maddie explains, shooting Chimney a look. He nods seriously. “In couples therapy.” “Huh,” Eddie says, and then he thinks about it. "Do you think Buck and I would benefit from couples therapy?" — or, Eddie gets Buck to come to couples therapy with him.

darling, the future's better than yesterday by rarakiplin (gmontys)

Eddie, ten years younger, in this awful 2010, blinks up at him. He's still sitting slumped on the curb, and for a second Buck thinks he might tell him to fuck off, but then his eyes fall shut and there’s something — aching and painfully vulnerable in the bend of his mouth, the faint tension in his brow. “My…um, girlfriend, I guess. She’s pregnant.” “Holy shit,” Buck says. - or, buck deals with some wonky dimensional/time travel and then breaks up with his girlfriend. eddie, obviously, is involved.

i'm here (i’m yours for the taking) by farfromthstars / @buckactuallys

“Everyone!” Around forty heads turn, and Buck shifts on his feet uncomfortably at the attention. “This is my old friend Buck and his husband, Eddie.” “Uh,” Buck makes, turning to Eddie with wide eyes. Eddie's looking just as stunned. “Connor, I think you got–” He cuts himself off when Eddie wraps an arm around his waist. ~ at the winter wedding of an old friend, buck and eddie pretend to be married to each other. the plan has no weaknesses, obviously, not even mistletoe or anyone’s secret feelings… they call it the season of giving i'm here, i'm yours for the taking

Your Fingerprints Smeared on My Heart (Lead Me Back to You) by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels

In 1880, Evan Buckley of the arriviste set is sent out west to oversee his family's railroad and recover from a broken heart - and meets Eddie Diaz, cowboy. When fate tears them apart, they make a promise: find each other again. In 2018, Buck walks into his fire station in Los Angeles - and meets Eddie Diaz, new recruit.

no kingdom to come by waywardrenegades

Family, FaceTime, guilt trips, phone calls, church, heart healthy meals, and learning how to let yourself be happy. Whatever that looks like. or; when his father experiences a health scare, Eddie flies to El Paso.

when i was shipwrecked (i thought of you) by catchingpapermoons 

Buck walks toward Jee-Yun’s room, still talking, and Christopher trails after him, asking excited questions in response, and Eddie’s smile grows. He wants this forever. Everything, every part of it; Buck, Christopher, and him—that’s all he needs. And— Oh. Oh no. He shuts his eyes for a moment, inhaling sharply. He’s looking at Buck, and feeling something strictly not platonic at all. or: Eddie needs to learn how to let himself feel, and one step at a time, he learns how to do just that. (And he falls in love with Buck along the way.)

i don't swim and you're not in love by hattalove / @hattalove

She turns to Eddie and says something else, but Buck is busy fighting the headrush he gets at the sound of Ana Flores calling Eddie and Christopher 'the boys'. Like they belong to her already. God, what’s wrong with him? What is this? or, eddie cooks, chris domesticates a slug, and buck tries to figure out why he hates his best friend's girlfriend. to everyone's immense shock and surprise, it goes badly.

everything's coming up milhouse by hammersmiths / @bucktommys

LAFD Updates (@L*A*F*D_Metro) LAFD Alert: Red-level traffic on Gardiner Road this morning. If you are trying to get into the city centre consider taking Westerley Lane. buck 🔥🔥 (@firebuck) so true bestie or, Eddie mans the LAFD Twitter account. Buck tries to be supportive.

said i couldn't stay, but it's different now by hattalove

“I think,” he says, watching Karen pull Hen out onto the dance floor, their eyes never leaving each other’s, “I think I’m just—sad.” Maybe. That feels like a close enough word to describe this gaping maw right in the center of his chest. It’s only really there sometimes, taking little bites out of him, easy enough to ignore, but today is worse. ���About being single at a wedding,” Eddie says, not a question. Buck shrugs. “Sounds stupid when you put it that way.” or, the one with the four weddings (feat. a drunk karen wilson, shania twain, a single cheerio, and some confessions over cubed fruit).

cause i'm tired of sleeping alone by rarakiplin (gmontys)

Buck goes on dates now. Not often, and never with the same girl twice in a row, but he goes on dates. And the thing is — the thing is, Eddie can’t be mad about that, because he goes on dates too. - or, five (ish) times eddie and buck go on dates with other people, and one time they go on a date with each other

so far from being free by allisonRW96

"That’s Daniel. He was our brother. Buck doesn’t know what to do with the past tense. He never had a brother. He’s always had a brother. He gained one and lost one in the same breath and it feels impossible. But even if Buck was capable of doubting Maddie, the truth of her confession is evident in the way it throws every facet of his childhood into sudden perfect clarity. That yawning, arctic absence. The unnamable fear. The impenetrable target of his parents’ approval that he was never, ever going to be able to hit. That they didn’t want him to hit. He has a brother. A dead brother who has haunted Buck’s steps for his entire life."

don't let the tide come and wash us away by writerforlife

Buck develops a relationship with the ocean, avoids talking about the day Eddie was shot, realizes he might be in love, and drives. Order may vary. (a fic for the "Buck is going to break all the way down in season 6" truthers)

dance, for all that we've been through by catchingpapermoons 

The Los Angeles Ballet’s 2022-2023 season ends with a bang with their fresh take on a ballet staple, Swan Lake. Artistic Director Bobby Nash is in his eighth season with the Los Angeles Ballet, and it has flourished under his direction. However, his associate, Eddie Diaz, is the one whose reimagining of the choreography has caught our attention... (or, Eddie Diaz moves to L.A. to restart his dance career, and ends up choreographing a show, finding a family, and falling in love. Not necessarily in that order.)

I'll Scrawl it on Every Wall I See by letmetellyouaboutmyfeels

When Eddie joins the 118, he and Buck don't exactly hit it off on the right foot. Or continue to walk on the right foot. In fact they kind of can't stand each other. Good thing they each have a beloved anonymous pen pal to share their daily woes with, someone completely unlike their insufferable coworker. Or, in which Buck and Eddie love each other before they know each other, and know each other before they love each other. When Eddie joins the 118, he and Buck don't exactly hit it off on the right foot. Or continue to walk on the right foot. In fact they kind of can't stand each other. Good thing they each have a beloved anonymous pen pal to share their daily woes with, someone completely unlike their insufferable coworker. Or, in which Buck and Eddie love each other before they know each other, and know each other before they love each other.

never felt this way before (yes i swear) by withoutthetiger

It’s the summer of 2022, when Buck no longer wants to be called Evan, and it only occurs to his parents to mind. It’s after the pandemic – or so they say – and before whatever hell will befall the world next, when Buck can’t wait to join the LAFD in September, and he doesn’t know if he’ll ever meet someone as gently strong and fiercely protective as his big sister. It’s the summer he goes with his family to the One Eighteen Ranch & Lodge. *** A Dirty Dancing AU, set in Texas in 2022, featuring a whole lot of familiar faces in a not so familiar place.

Fragile lines (and wasted time) by Mellaithwen / @mellaithwen

“Hey Buck,” Christopher says a little shyly, before reaching out to grab Buck’s foot through the hospital blankets—shaking it in the same way he’s woken his father up on many a bleary-eyed morning. The familiarity of the gesture makes Eddie’s head spin. But of course, there’s no response from the comatose man on the bed. “I thought you said he was sleeping,” Chris mumbles, angrily swiping at his cheeks, and Eddie’s already broken heart shatters all over again for whatever hope his son had just lost when his expectations were so cruelly dashed. . While Buck sleeps, and dreams in the aftermath of the lightning strike, Eddie tries desperately to hold himself together.

Don't Take the Money by HMSLusitania

“You know, being stuck here isn’t actually the end of the world,” Chimney says, coming up to the table and picking up one of the smoke detectors. “It just feels like it, Buck. Trust me, I know.” “I’m pretty sure it might actually be the end of the world,” Buck says. “Considering this is the sixth time I’ve lived this day.” Chimney stares at him for a beat and then his eyebrows lift. “Wait, are you like – dude, are you in Groundhog Day?” OR The post-lawsuit time-loop AU literally no one asked for.

keep your eyes on the road by iriswests / @fcntasmas

Buck used to speed through yellow lights; now they’re his favorite part of the drive. -- or; a glimpse into buck and eddie’s developing relationship, told through ten moments stopped at a traffic light

Hot Ghost Problems by ebjameston

The ghost would prefer to go by Buck, if Eddie wouldn’t mind. +++ [Eddie is the newest firefighter at the 118. Buck is the ghost haunting the 118. Unfortunately for both of them, Eddie's also a witch and needs to put Buck's spirit to rest, because that's what witches do. Turns out, Buck's spirit? Super not interested in being put to rest. Very interested, however, in flirting with Firefighter Diaz, who is just trying to survive his candidate year. (Also turns out, Buck? Super not dead.)

as lucky as us by hammersmiths

One of the first things Ravi learned when joining the 118 was to, under no circumstances, think too hard about Buck and Eddie’s relationship. But brother, they could try make his job easier. “I mean, I get it,” Buck’s saying, overhead, and Ravi’s knee-deep in literal human crap and even he can smell that shit from a mile away. “You and Tommy have a lot in common.” or, Ravi continually suffers as a third-wheel.

[johns-prince]

John was being honest when he described himself as dead lazy, and so having a partner and bff like Paul was perfect for him since Paul is such a workaholic and can hardly sit still.

John needed a push, someone who could carefully and patiently nudge and drive him along, or at least light the fire under his butt, because if not he could become listless, lethargic, and stuck. I'd say this was pretty obvious during the 70s.

Paul was perfectly suited for John in this, like in so many other ways too. Paul seemed not at all bothered, but quite comfortable with this position in their relationship, as far as I can tell. I'm thinking back to Paul making his way to John's house in Kenwood, that he'd often have to wake John up, this involving cups of tea or coffee. Maybe they did some writing and playing, maybe they didn't, as Paul said it was his way to get out of London.

Or, how Paul, John, and Ringo (sans George) had to do a Christmas recording, and how Paul, the whole time, was gently and patiently urging John on to just do it.

I think they're a perfect encapsulation of their relationship, these moments and memories caught.

They both gave each other a harmless need to compete, and to accomplish, together. I mean I'm sure there were plenty of times Paul's patience wore thin with John, and I'm sure John was very intentional in needling that, but insofar that I can tell, Paul really did have exceedingly, almost near limitless patience and love for John as both a partner and a friend.

John needed that, he needed someone like Paul, who could truly and unapologetically put up with him, and love him, and still want to work with him every day, day and night.

Even when the band broke up, the divorce finalized, and John was both loving and hating Paul in tandem for the next ten years... Paul was desperate to write with John again, and John was desperate just to write, you see.

PLAYBOY: But wasn’t it clear that John wanted only to work with Yoko?

LINDA: No. I know that Paul was desperate to write with John again. And I know John was desperate to write … desperate. People thought, Well, he’s taking care of Sean, he’s a house-husband and all that, but he wasn’t happy. He couldn’t write and it drove him crazy. And Paul could have helped him—easily.”

— Linda on John and Paul in the late 70’s and 1980. (X)

While Yoko was definitely driven and career oriented, that didn't necessarily mean she influenced, inspired, or drove John on herself. Not in the way Paul did. I think that's pretty evident, considering he subsumed himself to "house husband", only occasionally baking bread before even that lost his interest, in which he'd keep to lazing about, sleeping hours on end, and mindlessly watching tv.

John was no house husband, the role he took with Yoko was pretty far removed from his potential, even with Cynthia it wasn't that bad.

With Paul, John even thought of writing musicals, and he apparently wasn't even that fond of musicals—but if Paul wanted to do it, like so many other things, then why couldn't John? If John had Paul, then he could do just about anything and everything, really.

“MM: In the early days, did John and Paul really write together?

MARTIN: Yes, but they also wrote separately. “Please Please Me” and “From Me To You” and “I Want To Hold Your Hand” were undoubtedly collaborative efforts. They’d sit down and literally construct the songs together. I can’t remember the first individual songs, although obviously even before I met them they were writing individually, but if you go through them you can hear which of them are John-oriented and which are Paul-oriented. “Yesterday” is obviously Paul, and that’s an interesting point because it was the first time we ever used anyone other than Beatles on a record. There was no one on that record but Paul and a string quartet.

MM: Did you notice them growing apart, developing distinct personalities?

MARTIN: Paul and John had their own identifiable styles: Paul was the syrupy one and John was the hard one. But the rift wasn’t there then. They were really a unit.

MM: Could you tell me what you think of what each one has done individually since the last Beatles record?

MARTIN: I have great admiration for George. He’s done tremendously because it’s a sort of devotion to duty as far as he’s concerned. We forced him into being a loner, I guess … he could never collaborate with anybody in his writing and therefore when the split came he had more strength because he was forced to be alone. He learned an awful lot about producing, studio techniques, and so on, so that he was able … obviously, any one of them had the power - because they had the money - to spend as much time in the recording studio as they liked, and I know that when George made his album he spent six months doing nothing but overdubbing his own voice 16 times and producing his album. To have the tenacity to do that in itself is something of an achievement, but to go along and actually produce good sounds and good music and good lyrics with it is tremendous. I’m full of admiration for that.

I think the other two have suffered by comparison, because they’ve each indulged themselves in their own way. John’s become more obvious in a way … “Power To The People” is a rehash of “Give Peace A Chance,” and it isn’t really very good. It doesn’t have the intensity that John’s capable of. Paul, similarly with his first album … it was nice enough, but very much a home-made affair, and very much a little family affair. I don’t think he ever really rated it as being as important as the stuff he’d done before.

I don’t think Linda is a substitute for John Lennon, any more than Yoko is a substitute for Paul McCartney.”

— George Martin, Melody Maker Interview, 1971. (X)

John was very partner orientated. He needed someone, whether he liked it or not, and he needed them to need him too.

He didn't like being a husband, but he liked having a wife, someone there for him constantly, who loves him and will care for him. John had Cynthia for that, at the start. John had Pete as his partner in crime, bestest of mates, when they were just kids.

Then, John had Paul, and turns out, Paul just about covered all of that, too, and plus it. A best friend, a coconspirator, a wife, a collaborator, his partner, his rival and his greatest ally and muse. Cherry on top, Paul needed John just as badly, madly. Maybe John never saw it that way, maybe that was why he had his fear, his insecurity that Paul never really needed him as much as John needed him.

“IRVIN: Back then people were very keen on knowing who the leader of the group was…

GEORGE M.: Yes, I was. When I first auditioned them I said, “Who’s going to be the leader, is it John or Paul?” Such an odd couple really, because they were diferent and yet very similar, both had big egos, both very good songwriters, but they needed each other like mad.

IRVIN: Did they really like each other? It wasn’t just a competitive partnership.

GEORGE M.: Oh no, they loved each other! They were brothers, and like brothers they pissed each other off quite a lot. John could be maddening at times, Paul can be very bossy and even more maddening and George would get fed up with both of them. But they did love each other and adored what the other did and had an incredible bond.

Paul always took inspiration from John, especially in his lyric-writing. ‘Eleanor Rigby’, for example, wouldn’t have happened without John’s influence. Paul wrote all of it but John’s influence was there and similarly John was knocked out by the freshness Paul brought to melodies and harmonies. He learnt from Paul how to put in the odd chord that choked you up a bit.”

— George Martin, interview w/ Jim Irvin for Mojo: Sir George Martin: The Mojo interview. (March, 2007) (X)

I think I've gone off tangent, but the point of this was to say, John was dead lazy, vastly intelligent and talented, but very prone to sloth. Paul was a rather perfect stopper to that. He could whip John up, get him moving, shaking, ever patient and ever loving, just the right enough of mean, bitchy and stubborn, smart and quick tongued, to meet John toe-to-toe. Like a house on fire these two fired each other up, talk about all-consuming and intense.

They were pretty perfectly matched for each other.

“It was like a tug of war. Imagine two people pulling on a rope, smiling at each other and pulling all the time with all their might. The tension between the two of them made for the bond.”

— George Martin on Lennon/McCartney (X)

[hylkun]

30 DAYS | L. HEESEUNG

DAY 4: the strawberry cheesecake

SYNOPSIS: in which y/n l/n gives lee heeseung 30 days before graduation to prove his feelings for her are genuine.

PAIRING: popular!heeseung x quiet!fem!reader

GENRE: high-school!au, angst and lots of it, fluff

BEFORE YOU READ: cursing

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"Heeseung, I'm convinced you're actually dumb." Sunoo grumbles, while Heeseung holds his head down in shame. "Who in hell possessed you to get involved with Jang Wonyoung, of all people? And don't you like (Name)?"

"I know, I know - I just thought she didn't like me after she ditched us the other day, so," Heeseung murmurs, resulting in a hard slap from Sunoo on his shoulder. "Ow! What was that for?"

"That's for being an idiot. You're lucky I'm not like the rest of our friends and actually give a fuck about what you do. Now, I suggest that you have a very serious talk with (Name). Do you have her number?"

"Uh, yeah. Why?"

"Let me work my magic."

You immediately plop your phone onto the bed and rush into the shower. You were literally meeting Heeseung outside of school in less than 30 minutes, and you looked like a mess. Today was your off day, so you weren't expecting to be going out. Well, the day quickly turned around.

After yesterday's events, you sort of regretted getting involved with Heeseung - but a part of you wanted to give him another chance, despite him quite literally letting your arch nemesis kiss him on the cheek. Jang Wonyoung was pretty much known for ruining people's lives - especially yours.

Since middle school, Wonyoung had been endlessly tormenting you. To this day, you wonder what you could've done to make her hate you.

The sound of your phone ringing interrupts your daydreaming, and you step out of the shower. You check the caller ID, and Heeseung is calling. You hesitate to pick up, but you do after a minute, so it wouldn't go to voice-mail.

"Hello?"

"Hey, (Name)? I'm already here. Are you on your way?"

"The fuck? I just got out of the shower - give me 20 minutes."

You hang up, and you dress the fastest you have in your life before leaving home. Hopefully, Heeseung hasn't been waiting long. He's lucky you don't hold grudges. Otherwise, you would've taken longer on purpose.

15 minutes later..

You rush through the doors of Bighit Cafe, grabbing the eyes of numerous customers. You scan the place in search of Heeseung, and there he is - Goodness, he looked so much better out of his uniform. And his skin is practically glowing - God, why did he have to look so beautiful?

You approach his table, and with every step, you can feel your confidence dissipating. Heeseung notices your presence and smiles sweetly. "Hi!" He says. He grabs your hand - a gesture that makes your cheeks heat up - and leads you to the table.

As you sit, you feel the aura of awkwardness surround the both of you. It was as if everything you had planned to say and had just up and left. Well, that was until Heeseung finally spoke up.

"Look, I'm sorry. For, y'know, the whole Wonyoung issue. Well, she's my ex - and if you know Wonyoung, she's a pretty hard person to get rid of," he starts and takes a deep breath before continuing, "Just know I'm not interested in her anymore. It's her who's interested me."

You nod in response. It was pretty understandable. Wonyoung was a girl who would do whatever it takes to get something she wants, in this case, someone. It's not surprising that she would do all this to take Heeseung from you - not that he's yours or anything.

"Yeah, I totally understand. Wonyoung is a bitch." You say, and chuckle in hopes to lighten the mood and thankfully, it works.

"Tell me about it. Uh, on the brighter side, I asked Yunho what sweets you liked, and I ordered you some strawberry cheesecake. I already paid for it."

"Really? Thanks so much!"

And Heeseung loves to see you smile, even if it's over something small like strawberry cheesecake.

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TAGLIST: @zerobaseone-zhanghao @jooniesbears-blog @heeswif3y @nshitae @llvrhee @ikeusimp @starfallia @softieluvsyou @rairaiblog @lhspeachie @nishiriks @13tter @acousarah

[singto-prachaya]

Shitshow

So yesterday I saw a shitshow unfold and it made me both sad and angry. The fact that my two biggest faves have to deal with this and that most likely no on involved will be punished for what they have done. I'm sure not everything that's done yet has been translated but let me post what we got already.

Daou Pittaya was SH'ed on set by and uncle staff member and they made fun of Daou Pittaya being SH'ed. They also done some other stuff.

TW's are on the first tweet and I will put the rest under the cut

On the 1st day of shooting, they post this without telling the name of the series, but we can tell from the comment on the 2nd pic that it's col.

The thing is, the comments on the 3rd picture are super concerning. Even though they didn't say names or mention anyone, the fact that they are talking on the post about the 1st day of shooting is telling.

I will leave it for you to interpret the conversion. They might just talk about themselves or something worse, but it's disgusting either way

Second part is that uncle guy and some other staff have been leaking stuff about the series constantly. From cast members that weren't allowed to be revealed yet to other stuff.

They did delete the pictures with DO and Pond, but they retouched the pic and removed all 3 actors out and posted the retouched pic. With the caption "when the problems occurred, I'm just gonna face it".

TW : homophobic remarks, derogatory terms( F** )

The next day, after they had to take down the photo, the predator posted this on his Facebook. His friend(part of the crew) also raised the middle finger and commented, "Oops, unintentionally raised my finger."

Another person commented derogatory terms on the 2nd picture. I believe that everyone already know who this bitch referring to.

When i say that the word she used is the equivalent of the word "F" or "F***" I mean it*. To be more specific, it's derogatory terms for calling a fem gay man. So, yes, people in the LGBTQIAN+ community can be this Homophobic.

The 3rd pic is the people who laugh about the derogatory terms.

Yesterday, after the SH video came out and everyone was talking about it, (my assumption is that) D did some digging and found the comment on the 2nd pic, then proceeded to give the comment a WOW.

This is the reason why he tweeted, " Homophobic is disgusting. Just stop it. It's 2024 already. " On Twitter.

*The Thai equivalent they used is "tud".

He made another fb post which they above did not translate yet. But Google trans gave me the following: "A sad love triangle. The three of us. The slut is sitting with her face smiling. Haha."

See the original twitter thread here

[s7-evermore]

Ch. 4 - Tender Performance

Sorry this took a while to get out. I was busy af with college and everything lol. I haven’t edited this one yet, so I’m sorry in advance for the mistakes. I just wanted to get this one out of the way before finals take over my body and kill me—

The Boyfriend Contract Masterlist

Ch. 3 | Next Chapter

The Tender Performance of a contract means to offer or attempt to perform the agreement… and damn did he deliver.

It was fake-breakfast-date Tuesday. But Yuu’s nervousness was anything but fake.

She didn’t want to leave Grim behind on his own, so she made sure to text Azul ahead of time if it would be alright to bring him along.

“But of course,” he replied. You know, in the most unshady way he can via text.

“This better be worth it, Yuu,” Grim deadpanned as he slumped over her shoulder, “Seriously? You’re actually dating this guy?”

“Didn’t Ace and Deuce already tell you?”

“They did! And I thought they were messing with me!” He exclaimed with a prominent frown.

“And what would they gain from lying about this?” It was another stupid question from her, given that Ace would probably pull this type of prank on Grim.

“Because this is absurd!! It sounds like a lie! It sounds fake!!” He exclaimed louder, practically yelling into her ear. “Azul?! Seriously?! You’re dating him?? You agreed to date him?!”

She sighed, “Grim…”

“No— not even that! I can’t believe I had to hear this from Ace and Deuce first! We literally live together! How come I never heard about it?”

She felt guilty, but Grim was Grim. He’ll come around eventually.

“We tried to be discrete,” she simply replied.

“Man…” he sighed, “whatever, it’s probably none of my business who you date. Wish it was a better person though.”

“What’s wrong with Azul?”

“That’s such a stupid question,” he rolled his eyes, “like you weren’t there when he scammed us, or when he overblotted.”

Despite how he normally was, Grim knew Yuu well. They both knew each other well. Which was why she didn’t know whether to reveal to him her contract with Azul. However…

One of the terms stated in her contract with Azul was that only the two of them were to know the complete and clear details of their contract, and under no circumstances are they to tell anyone else.

The Leech twins probably already knew. While she knew that Azul wouldn’t tell them due to their contract’s terms, the twins were smart enough to know what had conspired between them. They didn’t need details to know everything when they were involved behind the scenes.

It took the whole night for her to process the fact that she would be fake-dating Azul for a while. It was Monday yesterday, and she was now on her way (with Grim) to one of her breakfast dates with Azul. One out of…well, many. Maybe.

She didn’t exactly discuss an expiration date, but Yuu had a feeling that things would calm down a bit when Azul’s end of the contract would be fulfilled.

That being said, she didn’t exactly have enough time to psychologically prepare for the experience of having breakfast with Azul as his…partner. Will the Leech twins be there as bodyguards? Will it just be the two of them with Grim third wheeling???

She hoped she was keeping a good exterior, because her mind was a train wreck.

Yuu didn’t expect much from the breakfast date aside from the subtle awkwardness between them. But for some reason, she didn’t expect him to be early…

Really early. He looked like he had been there for a good several minutes before she arrived.

“He’s early,” Grim said, speaking exactly what was on her mind.

She approached the Octavinelle Housewarden, who was seated at one of the empty tables. He was looking at his watch when she tapped his shoulder.

“Hey,” she greeted him with a small smile, “Good morning.”

“Good morning, Yuu,” he stood up from his seat with a polite smile before turning to the cat-like monster on her shoulder, “To you as well, Grim. Good morning.”

“Yeah yeah mornin’,” Grim said rather dismissively. “Didn’t think you’d actually be here.”

“Who do you think I am?” Azul frowned, dismayed by Grim’s remark, “I’m not one to ditch on dates, you know?”

“Don’t go thinkin’ you can drag my hench-human around just ‘cuz she agreed to go out with you!”

“Why, I would never think of doing such a thing!” Azul exclaimed, “Courtship is a consensual agreement. I asked for her consent and she agreed.”

Yuu sighed and looked down at Grim, “Come on now, Grim. Enough of that, didn’t you say you were hungry?”

“We should get some breakfast now,” Azul looked over at the buffet. “It’s still early, but the cafeteria will get filled up by students soon, so we should hurry up.”

“Sounds good to me!” Grim suddenly cheered, his mood lifting up at the sound of food.

She noticed the small quirk of Azul’s lips as they ordered their food.

“What will you two be having?” Asked one of the chefs.

“I’ll have two pieces of buttered toast and black coffee,” Azul replied.

Her eyes scanned the food at the cafeteria concessionaire before adding, “I’ll just have some Omurice, a glass of water, and a carton of chocolate milk.”

“I’ll have this, and this, and that grilled fish over there, and��“ Grim got off her shoulder and suddenly started pointing at a bunch of dishes.

“Hey! Calm down that’s too much!” Yuu scolded him, “Just limit it to two dishes!”

“We’re gonna have a full day today! I gotta make sure I don’t go hungry in between you know!”

“We still have lunch, you’ll be fine!” She stressed. “Ugh… seriously.”

“Why do you have to worry? Isn’t Azul paying for all this?” Grim asked, looking genuinely confused.

What?

“Huh?” She gaped at him, “What?! No! That’s not how it works!”

She looked over at Azul, only to find him already pulling out enough thaumarks from his wallet to pay for their meals.

“Woah—“ she placed a hand on his and stopped him, “what are you doing? You can’t pay for my stuff.”

“I can’t?” He blinked, looking just as confused as Grim.

“No!” She retaliated, “just ‘cause you’re a dude it doesn’t mean you have to pay for my meal.”

“And why not?” Azul asked.

“Well… it’s just… you don’t have to, okay?” She then leaned closer to him to whisper, “that’s not the kind of fake-dating relationship that I want.”

“Yuu,” he said, rather seriously, “this isn’t about me being a… ‘dude’—“ he cringed slightly at the word, “—you’re saving money aren’t you? It’s also part of our contract’s terms.”

“But you don’t have to pay for everything,” she said with a groan. It’s precisely because of this kind of thing that I’m saving money.”

“What do you mean?”

“Listen, just…don’t, okay?” She fiddled at her own sleeve, “it’s just, I don’t like relying on people when it comes to simple things like this. I definitely don’t want to become indebted to you more than I already have…”

Azul stared at her for a moment, making her more nervous. She hoped that she wasn’t breaching anything in their contract.

Yuu found it hard to rely on others, even when it comes to things as simple as paying for her food. She didn’t want to come off as helpless, or as someone who couldn’t provide for herself. Even before she came to NRC, she was used to getting by on her own, and she didn’t really need anyone’s help. She’d rather be the helper than the helpee… y’know?

“Then… just think of it as proof.”

“Huh?”

“Grim doesn’t seem to believe that we’re together. A lot of your friends don’t seem to believe us either,” he explained, “If I do this for you, then they won’t question the credibility of our relationship.”

“But—“ she paused for a moment, realizing that she hadn’t exactly told most of her friends the “status” of her relationship with Azul. Most of them (like Leona, Vil, and Riddle, for example) probably wouldn’t believe them, they knew Azul well enough after all.

They weren’t close, but they knew Azul and his tendencies.

I wouldn’t peg Azul for the type to blackmail a girl into being in a fake-relationship though… she thought.

“Do— do you think they’ll believe it?” she hesitantly asked.

He moved…closer, his breath tickling her cheek, “Do you think I would give just anyone anything without a price?”

Right. They don’t know their act. If they simply see Azul being generous to her, like a boyfriend would be, it would be believable enough. He wasn’t that kind after all.

He’s a little complicated, though.

“I wouldn’t be a good boyfriend if I didn’t at least try to pay for our meal,” he said, louder this time, enough for Grim and anyone nearby to hear.

“Come on, Yuu!” Grim encouraged her with a mischievous smile as he stood on the concessionaire counter. “Just let your boyfriend treat ya!”

She bit her lip, still uncertain. Even back when she was in a relationship— a real relationship, she didn’t like leaving this kind of thing to her partner. Even more so with a guy she’s fake-dating now.

“Is there a catch though?” She asked him quietly.

“None,” he replied, leaning down to whisper again, “this is just to honor our contract. We must look convincing enough, especially to your dorm mate.”

She bit her lip and hesitated. Grim ate a lot, and just while they were talking, he not-so-secretly added a cookie and a piece of coffee bread to Azul’s tray.

“…alright,” she finally relented before nodding over to Grim, who cheered.

After that whole back and forth (and the whispers), they sat at an empty table, Azul sliding next to Yuu, while Grim ate happily across them.

“Eat slowly, you’ll choke,” she warned him.

“Yeah yeah,” she lost him. He was too busy munching on his free meal to pay attention to whatever she was saying.

“Watching him eat all this gives me heartburn,” Azul said with a sigh, picking on his own food.

She shook her head before turning to him, “Grim tunes out the whole world when he’s this hungry.”

“I can only imagine how much you go through to feed this…creature.”

She shrugged, “I’m used to it. Anyway…” she leaned in closer to him, letting Grim wander off into his own world as she said in a low voice, “So, where were you born? Did you live in the Coral Sea your whole life or…?”

He raised a brow after taking a sip of his drink, “Is this one of your green-card marriage interview questions?”

His lips quirk up when she giggled, seemingly pleased with himself for making her laugh.

“I’ve lived in the Coral sea my whole life,” he replied, “The Atlantica Memorial Museum is but only a quarter of the whole area. There’s much to see there, but I’m not sure if it’s something you’ll enjoy.”

“Why not? I happen to like the sea.”

“I recall you saying that the sea is scary.”

“But it’s interesting,” she shifted on her seat to get comfortable. “Back in my world, more than 80% of the ocean has never been explored, mapped, or even seen by humans. Literally a great number of stars and planets has been explored more than the ocean floor! Isn’t that insane?”

“Hard to imagine, as a merfolk, that is,” he said. “If you’re so interested, then perhaps I should take you on a date somewhere in the Coral Sea someday…”

With the way he spoke, Yuu almost thought he was serious. But Grim was right next to them, and, with the cafeteria slowly filling up, who knows who could be listening in on them.

“That would be nice,” she said softly, feeling kind of shy all of a sudden.

He smirked, sensing her shyness, “Perhaps I can take you to my mother’s restaurant.”

Okay, now she was sure he was teasing her. Yuu didn’t want to go as far as to meet his mother. This was only a one-time fake-dating thing, and the last thing she wants is to extend the lie to Azul’s parents.

She rolled her eyes before saying, “I did hear from Jade that your mother runs a restaurant in the Coral Sea…”

“Yes, it’s a very popular restaurant. If you ask any local for directions, they would probably take you there themselves,” he spoke with a hint of pride.

She giggled, “I see where you get your business side from. Does your mother know you’re running mostro lounge here at school?”

“She invested in it,” he smiled, “and of course, every time I visit I show her documents of our profit— to show her its success.”

Wow. It was kind of weird to imagine that he had— or has, she’s clearly still alive— a mother. A family. You know… all those warm homey stuff before he became a tall, (handsome) intimidating, infamous cafe manager.

“She must be really proud of you,” she said.

“Naturally.”

“And your father?”

“Which one?”

She blinked, “Shit, you have two?”

“My biological father and my stepfather,” he answered, “both of my biological parents got divorced when I was young, and my stepfather was my mom’s divorce lawyer. Well… you can imagine what happens next.”

“Huh… I actually didn’t expect that,” she muttered, “Did you learn contracts and stuff from your stepfather then?”

“You’re smart. Yes, he taught me all about them,” he replied.

“I don’t know if I should thank him or not,” she sighed, “do you see your biological father often?”

“He calls every now and then to see how I’m doing, but other than that, very rarely,” he replied. Yuu wondered if it was a sensitive topic, but Azul didn’t seem bothered by it at all.

She looked over at Grim, who was now chugging on a mug of water. He inhaled his food like it was nothing.

“Well that was fun,” she said when she finished the last of her food.

“Does breakfast end here?” Azul asked as he watched her clean up her plate.

“Well I wouldn’t want to be late, and Grim might insist on more food if we don’t leave soon.”

Azul checked his watch, “We still have lots of time.”

She stabbed her straw into the carton of milk before taking a small sip, “Yeah but our classrooms—“

“Where were you born?”

She blinked at him. Oh, did he want to get to know her too?

Knowing Azul, it was likely for the sake of getting information about her, but truthfully, she would have to disappoint him. There was nothing remarkable about her, after all.

“In another world.”

He rolled his eyes, “I knew that, but where?”

“You wouldn’t know either way.”

“It would still be nice to know,” He insisted.

She pursed her lips, “Yokohama, Japan. I moved to Tokyo for college though.”

“Tokyo? Is it another city?”

“It’s the capital of Japan, my home country,” she replied.

“And why Tokyo?”

“My dream college is in Tokyo. It’s a little difficult to get in it, but I got a scholarship in the end, so all is good.”

His eyes widened slightly, “A scholarship? You must have worked really hard.”

“Not having a social life helps sometimes.”

He chuckled, “And what were you going to take?”

“Visual Communication,” she said, “there’s a master’s degree program too, so if I do exceptionally well in my undergraduate degree then I’ll hopefully be chosen for another scholarship for the masters program. Which I REALLY hope I get.”

She internally groaned at the thought of all those sleepless nights in high school, trying to keep her grades up while balancing odd jobs. She knew she would have to work twice as hard in college, given that college means more work, more brain power, and more money. Next time she would have to work night shifts more often.

“Your parents must be quite proud of you for getting that far, right?”

Yuu froze for a moment before giving him a stiff smile, she didn’t really want to think about it too deeply. It had already been years, after all. No use on dwelling in the past.

“Speaking of, what are your parents like?”

“Dead.”

Azul nearly choked on his black coffee. “I’m—“ he coughed a couple of times and composed himself, “I’m sorry—“

She smiled and shook her head, “It’s fine.”

It wasn’t that much of a sensitive topic to her anymore, honestly. In fact, the way she responded to him so bluntly was kind of funny. Like an incorrect tumblr meme or something.

“I…I see,” his face was in its neutral expression— the kind that often made her nervous. It wasn’t that he looked scary or anything, he actually looked somewhat professional.

He really is handsome… she thought shamelessly. Honestly, he looks like one of those serious-looking CEOs from one of those K-dramas or manhwas.

She studied his face as he silently stared at her. It made her a little uncomfortable, both his silence and the fact that he looked so focused on her face as if he was trying to unearth every single little secret of hers.

“Prefect?”

She flinched at the sudden voice as she looked away from Azul.

“Riddle!”

Standing before their table was the Heartslabyul Housewarden, accompanied by his usual retinue, that being Trey, Cater, Ace, and Deuce.

“Woah! So the rumors were true!” Cater beamed at the sight of the unexpected couple, “You guys really are dating.”

“Why do you sound so surprised?” She asked him, “Weren’t you the one who took a photo of us?”

Cater raised both his hands in mock surrender, “Hey now, don’t get mad at me! How could I not when it was the most ridiculous thing I’ve seen that day?”

Ace made a disgusted look, “Ugh, seeing you two make those googly eyes at each other is so cringey. Glad I’m not Grim.”

“Hey, don’t be mean!” Deuce elbowed Ace before smiling down at the Prefect. “But…Ace is kind of right though. You guys look really close.”

“It’s only natural,” Azul spoke up first as he pushed his glasses up, “She’s my girlfriend after all.”

Riddle made a funny face at the word “girlfriend”, and yet he remained strangely quiet.

“Wow, I really didn’t expect this from you, Azul,” Trey chuckled, albeit rather awkwardly, “Then again, you’re always ambitious— I guess it’s no different when it comes to love, huh?”

“Speaking of, how long has this thing been goin’ on?” Cater asked. “It’s kind of sudden. I can’t tell if you guys are just that good at hiding it or you had to blackmail Grim to keep it under wraps.”

“Hey!” Grim pouted, “For the record, I didn’t know about it either until Ace and Deuce told me!”

“What?! For real?!” Cater looked quite appalled at the revelation. “Dang! No wonder we didn’t know about it… Grim isn’t exactly the best at keeping secrets, you know?”

Grim snarled at Cater’s remark.

“How long have you two been… seeing each other?” Riddle asked reluctantly as he eyed them.

Riddle always remained suspicious when it involved Azul and the twins, that was the only reason Yuu could come up with when she saw the scrutiny in his eyes as he looked at the two of them.

It made Yuu quite nervous. She had been friends with Riddle for quite some time now, and it made her feel just as guilty to lie to him like this. Aside from that, however, Riddle also had an acute sense of responsibility and justice. If he felt something was amiss, he would surely look into it, just as he did during the incident with Savanaclaw.

As though sensing her apprehension, Azul placed his hand on top of hers, and it was…weirdly warm. He was always warm, and it was comfortable…for some reason.

Damn, leave it to a touchstarved girl to feel warm about Azul.

“For a while,” Azul replied with an amiable smile as he held her hand on top of the table— a sign of their relationship. “But if you’re curious of the specifics, we’ve been seeing each other for over a month and a half.”

Azul gave her a look and a soft smile.

Right, okay. So that’s their story. A month and a half of “secretly dating”.

“I’m sorry we kept it from you guys…” She suddenly said, “We just… wanted a little privacy, you know?”

Riddle stared at their intertwined hands without a word.

“Why apologize?” Trey spoke up instead, “you guys did nothing wrong. Besides, it’s probably Cater’s fault that your peace was interrupted.”

“Hey!” Cater looked at Trey in horror, “how come I’m the only one to blame here?! You were there too!”

Azul chuckled, “It’s not a problem at all. In fact, I think it was a good thing, for the both of us. We don’t have to keep hiding it any longer.”

He turned to her, “Are you finished eating?”

“Huh?” She looked down at her now empty plate, “Uh, yeah…”

“It seems that Grim has finished as well,” He stood up and stretched his hand out in front of her.

“Shall I walk you to your classroom?”

She ignored the stares of disbelief from her friends as she took his hand, “Of course.“

“We’ll be off now,” Azul looked at the five Heartslabyul students with his signature smile, “I hope you have a good morning.”

“I’ll see you guys later!” She exclaimed, “let’s go, Grim!”

Her furry companion hopped off his seat and followed the couple as they walked hand-in-hand out of the cafeteria, leaving behind several stunned students in their wake.

[statementlou]

my post yesterday about why I don't really care if Louis Tomlinson supports starbucks shocked me by actually circulating and getting notes and obviously I like validation and appreciation.... but I feel kind of weird about my big contribution to the topic being something that might come off as discouraging attempts to help Palestine. Feeling powerless in the face of such injustice is horrible and scary and traumatizing and while there are certain things that I do not think make much difference (like boycotting irrelevant targets), that's NOT how I feel about the situation in general! We CAN make a difference and help the Palestinian people! It can feel impossible to fight against all that power and propaganda and military might- but it has been done successfully over and over, colonialism has been destroyed in one place after another a hundred times in the last century, apartheid regimes have fallen, occupations have ended, because over and over, always, even all the military might in the literal world is less powerful than a united front of the PEOPLE. As Ursula K LeGuin said, "We live in capitalism. Its power seems inescapable. So did the divine right of kings. Any human power can be resisted and changed by human beings", and as Louis Tomlinson said "The power and magic comes from the people, you guys. Don't undermine your role in all of this" and "get off the 'gram and into the streets"!

Under the cut are things you can do that I believe actually directly impact the Palestinian people and the Israeli government, including some easy ones, and the key to a successful movement is to have every type of contribution, to have NUMBERS. However- it is also necessary to have people willing to do the actual work of fighting injustice, not just changing their consumer habits or yelling at people online. I strongly encourage people to explore becoming physically involved in activist work, and not to see it as yet another tiring obligation but rather as a way to help yourself feel less overwhelmed and exhausted. Feeling powerless and defenseless is a trauma that follows us into every corner of our lives, but standing up and working for change can not only save lives, but is good for your own mental health as well, I promise.

I can't make you an exhaustive list of resources, only tell you some tactics that I believe are actually useful. I'm not an expert or whatever, but I have been actively involved in social justice advocacy, activism, and direct action for over 20 years and am drawing on that history of both things that worked and were great and things that were not from my personal experiences. Thank you to @captainrayzizuniverse for helping me (but she didn't see the post any stupid things said by mistake are entirely on me), and especially for pointing out a big (typical white person) slip up, which was to almost forget the very first item on this list: Listen to, support, and amplify Palestinian voices!!! The whole starbucks issue wouldn't even exist if people just went by this single important guideline and did the things Palestinians were asking for rather than making up other things to do instead. In life altogether, and speaking as a disabled person god does this come up a lot: if you want to help someone, start by asking them what they need and then do that even if it isn't what you think they should want. Don't fucking wing it!! Join local groups organizing for Palestine: the people united are powerful, but only if they are united and working in large groups! Join a group! This is hard because... how? who? And I can't answer that for everyone but I can tell you that in the US JVP (Jewish Voice for Peace) is doing a huge amount of very accessible recruiting, you can just join (you don't need to be Jewish) and get involved straightaway in the great actions they're putting on. PYM (Palestinian Youth Movement) is not open to everyone to join but you should definitely follow them on SM to keep up on actions and maybe find ways to support. If you're a student I bet there is some kind of group at your school?

Go to protests: protest works, period. The general politician rule of thumb is that anyone who bothers to actually go out and march represents 10-100 voters. When they look at the numbers (like- '500-1000 people protested the most recent bill you signed') they do this math and they worry. But also honestly if it's something you can manage- it's good for you. It helps. Even if you just go alone and don't talk to anyone, being in a crowd of hundreds of people feeling the same things you are, caring as much as you do, it helps. If you can, yell along to the chants as loud as you can. Get fired up and use that energy to keep going and not despair!

Call and write officials: if you live in the US or UK this is HUGE. What I said above about how they count people at protests as standing for more people who didn't bother but agree? Same with phone calls for sure, it REALLY pressures them. Many orgs make this really easy- I get emails all the time with links to send a letter in a single click or click to call and all you have to do is read the script, get on some lists I guess? But many sites also have this feature, JVP does for example

Support BDS: the Palestinian led BDS have been doing the work of isolating and chipping away at Israel for 19 years and like I said, the actions of the masses only work if we are united behind a few strategic targets rather than all over the place; they have made this possible. It's good to avoid buying from the companies they target; even better to work on the big divestment campaigns. For example, student groups pressuring the big universities to divest from BDS targets echo the successful University divestment efforts that helped end apartheid in South Africa.

Send money: money helps, immediately and concretely, and again if we are many, each person doesn't have to do a lot. Do what you can spare, it all adds up. This has been painful with Gaza for sure, with millions donating but aid being blocked. I don't have The Answer but here's a group I found that actually seems to be getting aid in, and here's a spread sheet of gofundmes- note that people who have foreign passports do not have to pay the horrible border crossing fees, so you may wish to focus on funding those who don't have that privilege. this could maybe be better and there was some other stuff I wanted to say about doing activism to tie up the "activism as self care" thing from above and also bringing it back around to talk about Louis more but I'm tired and I'm hungry right now and this is a lot already. So. Bye lol sorry. send me asks if any of that is something you care about or want to hear

[falling-violet-petals]

I spent the last two weeks reading every single witch hat atelier chapter (except for 77 which was published yesterday lol) and it has consumed my entire life.

I am obsessed with Qifrey just the idea of a really sweet professor who is also very morally grey and has a very dark past taking in all these traumatized little girls as his witch apprentices to protect them from the same experiences he went through and being so so understanding of their experiences and emotions and worrying about them and never pushing them to do things they don't want to do and letting them experiment as much as they want while providing guidance when they need it. And especially his relationship to Coco with how strongly she resembles his younger self and how they parallel each other but this time as her professor he is trying to keep her away from the pain he suffers and he's trying to make Coco have hope in magic in a way that he himself doesn't have. And the way he acts towards the girls actually makes them trust him SO much like (spoilers) Coco has been keeping the whole Custas ordeal a secret at the request of Tartar but in the more recent volumes she has finally decided to tell Qifrey because of how much she trusts him and Qifrey not only patiently listened to her and allowed her to do what she wanted even though it was dangerous because he knew how important it was but he also actually wanted to help Custas and was willing to talk to him instead of immediately fighting him for doing forbidden magic like the other adults (sorry Lulucy). And like idk it's weird because I'm used to seeing characters that are morally grey like him but to having a character like that just be such a genuine and good teacher/father figure. And granted he actually does have selfish reasons to want to have Coco as an apprentice and that's a big part of what makes him morally grey but a great thing about it is that he doesn't actually let these reasons change the kind of father/daughter or professor/apprentice relationship he has with her like he doesn't treat her any differently than his other apprentices and he very much cares about her beyond just being a lead to the brimhats and he constantly shows it with his actions.

Also his relationship to Olruggio is also so perfectly contradictory. Like you can't convince me they aren't in love. Personally unlike some of the fandom that likes to say they are just married but haven't said it I like to believe that they are both in love and are vaguely aware of the fact that the other likes them back but Qifrey refuses to confess because he doesn't think he deserves it for obvious reasons and he also thinks Olruggio would realize his intentions even sooner if they were romantically involved and Olruggio on the other hand is so used to Qifrey's secrets and dodgy personality and refusal to talk about serious things that he's afraid if he confessed Qifrey would just completely shut him off (we all know he would actually do something worse but shh 🤫). But even without the shipping if you just (for some reason) see them as friends there is still so much to say about their relationship like Olruggio clearly cares so deeply about Qifrey that he spent his childhood with him and then moved with him to his atelier and still lives with him after all the crazy things Qifrey pulls off (like spontaneous adoption) and he also forgives Qifrey for everything no matter what and (spoilers for chapter 40) still Qifrey (who is very much still affected by his trauma on the daily) is so closed off that he is not able to accept all of this affection and acceptance that Olruggio is willing to give to the point that Qifrey is actively harming him and violating his personhood by erasing his memories whenever he finds out about Qifrey's search. And like... the fact that Qifrey is so traumatized that in "self-defense" he's turning around and doing the exact thing that traumatized him to the person he loves most and the fact that Olruggio loves him so much that he would be willing to forgive even this... I don't even know what to say anymore because they just make me want to scream.

Anyway yeah I like Qifrey a normal amount I swear

[lucy90712]

pedri and y/n trying to get over each other but they can’t and after their breakup pedri hasn’t been doing well and his publicist forced him to date someone in order to be the topic of the year again and do well on his socials, but y/n misinterprets that and accepts to date gavi, and pedri also misinterprets that. both y/n and pedri go on breaking each other hearts more until a couple of shots at the bar change it all

A/n: I decided to go with Fermin instead of Gavi hope that’s ok

What a dickhead. How did I ever date that man. Why have I been crying over him when clearly he doesn't care about me at all. Less than a month ago Pedri broke up with me and I've been with mess ever since, we were together for over a year and I really thought he was the one but now it's very clear to me that he wasn't. Three whole weeks after our break up he has posted a picture on his story on a date with his new girlfriend while I'm still getting over the heartbreak. I knew he would move on one day but I didn't expect it to be so quickly and I certainly didn't expect to see him post about it seeing as he hardly ever posted with me. Seeing this makes me wonder if he ever actually loved me or if he fell out of love and how long he stayed with me while he didn't want to be. What makes this all worse is that I know the girl he's with she's a model and she's so much prettier and more successful than me which hurts my self esteem quite a bit. 

Seeing that Instagram story when I first woke up was one way to get myself over the break up as instead of feeling sad now I'm just so mad that I want to forget about Pedri all together. I didn't want to move on this quickly as Pedri was my first long term boyfriend and my first love but he's made it a whole lot easier for me as the feelings I had for him have gone out the window. I never thought my feelings would go away overnight but as it turns out they can and they did and now I'm ready to move on and I have the whole day to live free of the sadness I've been feeling. 

Even though I'm no longer with Pedri I've remained friends with his teammates as they have always been so nice to me especially Fermin. He is close with Pedri but they aren't best friends by any means so I didn't feel bad still talking to him and he still seems happy to talk to me. Fermin was even sweet enough to text me overnight and warn me about Pedri's story which I wish I'd seen before checking Instagram but the gesture was lovely nonetheless. I decided to text him thanking him which he replied to straight away asking if I'd like to go out for coffee to take my mind off things. If he'd have asked me yesterday I would've said no but today I don't have any reservations in fact it will be nice to see him as I haven't actually seen him in person since Pedri and I broke up. 

Fermin came and picked me up and drove us to a smaller neighbourhood just outside the city where there is a quiet cafe that Pedri always told me we should go to but we never did. We both ordered drinks and pastries for breakfast which he insisted on paying for as he invited me to come. Once we sat down together things were a little awkward for a minute as it feels like we shouldn't really be here together but really we aren't doing anything wrong I'm not with Pedri anymore and Fermin is free to spend time with whoever he wants. Fermin broke the silence by asking how I've been and I was honest with him and telling him that I've been hurting but I'm over it now. 

After getting over the awkwardness we got on really well which we did before but we always had other people there who were involved in the conversation but apparently we didn't need that as we get along really well without too. Fermin was really sweet and he made me forget about everything else going on in my life and he had me laughing harder than I've laughed in months. Spending time with him reminded me a little of how things started between Pedri and I as once we were given the time so talk we got on like a house on fire and being with Fermin feels like that. 

~~~~~~~~~~

Over the last few weeks I've been spending a lot of time with Fermin and I've found myself falling for him. We have been on a few dates and all of them have been amazing I have had a great time from the second he picks me up to the second he drops me off. We haven't made things official yet but I don't think it will be long because the only reason we have been waiting is so that I can have more time to heal from my breakup but I think I'm ready to commit to Fermin. Pedri has made the whole thing easier as he keeps posting things with his new girlfriend which bugged me for a while until I unfollowed him so I wouldn't have to see him or them together. I can't lie I have been trying to get him back as I've posted things with Fermin as my account is private and I know he sees them but I don't know if it bothers him. 

Tonight there is a team get together which Fermin wants me to go to with him. The first few times he told me about it I was hesitant to go as I know Pedri will be there and not only do I not want to see him I don't want to create an awkward atmosphere for everyone by turning up with Fermin after spending a year going to these things with Pedri. I almost completely said no but after thinking about it I decided that I'd go as I can't avoid Pedri for the rest of my life especially if I want to date Fermin. Before agreeing to go I made him promise to tell everyone that I was coming as his date as I know it looks bad that I've moved in from Pedri with one of his teammates and I don't want everyone to find out right when I turn up and cause drama. Fermin told me that he told everyone and they didn't care and they don't think I'm some sort of whore which made me feel more comfortable about going. 

I drove myself to the address Fermin gave me then I had to park which was difficult but I parked a few streets away and then walked back. As I walked back I saw Fermin waiting outside for me looking at his phone but as soon as he saw me he put it away and smiled at me. Once I was close enough he pulled me into a hug and kissed my cheek. He grabbed my hand and we headed inside which is when I felt really nervous all of a sudden but as soon as we got in and the other guys noticed us they greeted us both normally which made me feel a whole lot better. 

Somehow I found myself sitting at the bar on my own while Fermin sat with his friends talking. Things haven't been as awkward as I thought they might be everyone has treated me like they did when I was with Pedri but I feel wrong being here. I really thought I was over Pedri but being in the same place as him has made me really miss him. That might be how I've found myself at the bar with a drink I don't even really like. Seeing Pedri has me thinking about what I have with Fermin and whether I actually like him the way I thought I did or if I'm trying to pretend I do to make myself feel better that Pedri has moved on. This is the whole reason I wanted to spend more time getting over the breakup as I didn't want to find myself dating someone just as a rebound but I think that's what I've done anyway. 

Just as I was thinking about all of the choices I've made over the last few months I saw someone sit next to me at the bar. I didn't even need to look to know who it was I recognised the smell of his after shave as he's always used the same one. He ordered himself a drink and got me another one which made me actually look up at him. 

"Hi" I said 

"Hey how have you been how are things with Fermin?" He asked 

"I've been better I didn't really know what's going on with Fermin we aren't official and I'm not sure that I want to be" I admitted 

"I'm sorry if it makes you feel better I've not been at my best either" he said 

"What about your new girlfriend you guys seem really happy" I said

"Thats not real my team wanted me to be in a relationship with someone who has a following so this whole thing is for pr we aren't even actually dating we see each other for a few minutes every so often to take pictures of post" he explained 

"Wait so you don't have a girlfriend?" I asked 

"No I don't I'm still trying to get over you" he said 

"Me too" I said under my breath 

"Then why are we doing this we clearly aren't happy" he said 

"You broke up with me that's why we are doing this" I said sarcastically back 

"And I really regret doing it I honestly don't know why I broke up with you I miss you every day and the boys can attest that I've been a mess since we ended things" he admitted 

"I've been a mess too" I said 

"Then do you want to give things a go again we can have a clean slate and we can go slow if you want" Pedri suggested

"I'd love that but I don't want to go slow I just want to go back to how we were but before we do anything I have to talk to Fermin" I said 

Pedri understood and he let me go so I could find Fermin who luckily was on his own so I gave him a look and he followed me outside so we could have some privacy. Somehow I think he knew what was coming because the look on his face told me he was upset but not mad. 

"I know you probably saw me talking to Pedri and I want you to know that I do really like you Fermin but I'm not over Pedri so I think it's best we end whatever's going on between us" I said 

"It's ok I could tell you weren't over him and you seemed really happy when he was talking to you again so I'm ok with letting you go so you two can be happy together" he said 

"Thank you Fermin I really have loved the time we spent together we just weren't meant to be but I hope we can still be friends" I said 

"Of course I'm not fully letting you go because you are too much fun" he laughed 

I gave him a hug and kissed his cheek before heading back inside to find Pedri. Pedri was waiting for me so I told him how my conversation with Fermin went and he asked me to be his girlfriend officially again but we agreed not to act like a couple around Fermin for a while as that felt too mean. We both know that things might be awkward between all of us for a little while but things will get better over time and I'm happy as I got my Pedri back. 

[dlartistanon]

There's a Liz CG in chapter 13 and I'm both excited and scared at the same time... Please enlighten us on what happened when you've got the time (っ °Д °;)っ

Let me tell you that I nearly jumped out of my seat when I first saw that CG. And let me tell you that Liz's expression was the second thing that gave me concern. I absolutely had to know what was going on immediately.

So, below the cut, I'm going to recap the most pertinent parts regarding this scene. Afterwards, I will reblog with my thoughts and commentary, and some speculation.

Shiningale focus? In my main plot? IT'S MORE LIKELY THAN YOU THINK.

CHAPTER 13 SPOILERS AHEAD

First off, this scene involving Logos, Ascalon, and Salus:

Logos: How far have you tampered with your… "bloodline"? It’s unimaginable that you are blood relatives of the Follower Shining. Such an outstanding person must always repent for your filth. (This is after Ascalon stabbed Salus in the neck)

After that, there's a conversation between Kal'tsit and Shining:

Kal'tsit: What's Nightingale's status?

Shining: … Outside the window, Shining sees Nightingale sleeping, leaning against a tree. Shining: Not good. Though Liz's state has never been more stable, the levels of Originium content in her body are rising, most likely even affecting her pain nerves.

Kal'tsit: This would not be a normal infection.

Shining: Maybe it's the sorcery devices that Sarkaz have set up on the battlefield, or the whispers of dead souls… I don't know. I can't tell her "I empathize with your pain." I really don't. But she happily told me yesterday that she hasn't felt pain in her sleep for a long time…

Kal'tsit: You're hesitating. You've been hesitating ever since you came back from the Confessarii alone. Do you remember the reason you applied to come along to Londinium in the first place?

Shining: 'To cure Liz'. Dr. Kal'tsit, I have never hesitated, even for a moment, about that goal.

Kal'tsit: Even without knowing the exact state of her condition, we all know what "cure" means.

Shining: What needs to be done hasn't changed… I know.

Kal'tsit: I trust you. The eyes with which you view Nightingale are not only compassionate. You're not the only one who's taking care of her, she's treating your fears as well. Nightingale may be physically challenged, but she is a member of the Followers, your companion, not a delicate flower to be protected. The secrets of the Confessarii are truly stomach-churning. But perhaps it is only by confronting the deepest of abominations that we can unravel the truth.

Shining: …

Kal'tsit: I know you're a little upset, Shining. But as we said at the beginning of our partnership, Rhodes Island will help, if you need it.

Shining: --Thank you, Dr. Kal'tsit. The blue feathered beast lands on Shining's shoulder, chirping. It was Liz's usual way of greeting her. Shining: … Liz is awake, I'm going to get her.

Nightingale then recalls a dream (or a memory?) that's very peculiar. Basically it's her and Shining when they were younger, holding hands and walking along a river and watching a bird, but then something strange and horrifying happened to the bird.

Unfortunately the next thing that happens is that they're ambushed by Confessarius and Salus in an attempt to kidnap Nightingale. Kal'tsit summons Mon3tr but Salus--from her battle with Amiya--is able to restrain Mon3tr. Apparently she was able to do this by performing rituals on herself and finding a way to cannibalize the Arts of other bloodlines. She also dove into Amiya's memories (where it turns out that there's a part of Theresa's soul/consciousness that's protecting Amiya still).

Kal'tsit: Mon3tr!

Shining: Dr. Kal'tsit, you can't move yet. Shining: I told you--you and I will only meet on the battlefield.

Confessarius: Oh? Then why are you hiding your sword at this moment? When you left home, you swore an oath to sever your family's bloodline, and I have longed for you to return and fulfill that oath. I gave you time, and you let me down again and again. We should have given birth* to the next me. It would have been the most ethereal bloodline in nearly a hundred years. Then Liz uses her Arts.

Confessarius: … well. Sharp, but full of impurities. What happened to your soul? Do you still think you have hope while you are away from us?

Shining: … Liz! Come back!

Nightingale: …！I won't… at your mercy!

Confessarius: … oh? You are truly an unexpected piece of work, far beyond my expectations. Even though it's just a body, can it still touch "me"?

Nightingale: Shining, now! I… I can't hold on for long!

Shining: … A strange feeling came over Shining.

Nightingale took the initiative to resist Confessarius and restrained him. The ancient demon clan, which had never seen its true soul, was now more vulnerable than ever. Bloodline. The word bloodline was vague, but at this moment, a long bloody crack seemed to appear right in front of you.

Shining hesitated. How could it be so simple?

How can it be so simple?

Kal'tsit: Nightingale, stop! This is a trap, he's waiting for your Arts!

Nightingale: ——！ Time slowed down.

Confessarius: You and I both know where fate will lead us, but the only one who doesn't know is this poor caged self. Contempt of blood and resistance to destiny are doomed to be in vain. No one can deny the heavenly principles gifted by our bloodline. I will do for you what you hesitated to do, create a gap in the cage… Come into the cage with me, and I will set you on the right path. Think through your options… [ancient Sarkaz name].

On the stone platform covered with dead branches, the white sword pierced the heart.

Shining remembers the first time she cried, how amazing it was, giving birth to emotions that she didn't expect. A new soul is carved and shaped under the sword's edge.

???: I have seen… your pain… your… tears…

Confessarius: Accidents always bring surprises. You could have stopped experimenting right then, but you couldn't bear to destroy the ignorant consciousness in that empty shell. … So you sewed memories into the empty shell.

Shining: She is Liz. She shouldn't…

Confessarius: It is your freedom to name your populated consciousness "Liz".

"Liz" was afraid of the silence of those across the long table. They meet to sit here and have dinner at the same time every day.

But the white-horned Sarkaz holding the sword opposite her had stopped talking to her, taking only notes. "Liz" is always asking herself, 'did I do something wrong to make her angry?'

"Liz" misses the fond memories of their past…

Liz?: I repeat the same dream every day, dreaming about us walking hand in hand in the stream when we were children… Then I flew up, flying higher and higher, but you couldn't hold onto me. From the clouds, I saw you crying. Every time I want to come back to you, I wake up in pain. I ache from feeling your pain and I want to share the burden with you. As long as you tell me why you are suffering… Quesasina.

Shining: …

Confessarius: Quesasina, the name means "hope that does not allow separation", our destiny. She blames herself for your moment of kindness, and she thinks all the fault is her own, this poor "Liz."

Shining: I have abandoned that sinful name. I am now Shining and will only ever be Shining.

Confessarius: Really? Do you think you can resist your family's destiny for thousands of years? I'll wait and see.

"Liz" held the blue feathered beast she rescued from the river in her hands. Her indigo feathers trembled, and the cold river water made her shiver. She thought Quesasina would be angry, but the sad Sarkaz just knitted a brand new birdcage for "Liz".

"Put it in the cage, and it'll be safe from now on."

Liz?: Quesasina, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to risk walking into the river to save it… but I can't just watch it die like this. I fell in love with it when your family gave it to me as a gift. It likes to fly freely, but once it gets too far away from me, it seems to lose its energy and always falls into the river… You said the same thing happened yesterday… but I don't remember it at all. But I will listen to you and put it in a cage. I will protect it. Please don't be angry. I promise you, such a stupid thing will never happen again.

Confessarius: The more fragments and lies you fill her with, the more confusion and pain she will feel. I uncovered the dusty fragments for her. Her awakening is irreversible, and she will eventually painfully disintegrate her rootless consciousness.

Shining: I won't let that happen, Father. I will put an end to our sins with my own hands, and Liz will be cured.

Confessarius: Then what? Isn't her regaining the truth what you fear, dear sister? This is the source of your sad hesitation.

Shining: …

Confessarius: I tolerated you wandering around with this container, and I tolerated you continuing to strengthen this fragile cage… Because I trusted you to love it with all your heart, and you didn't disappoint. Eventually you will come back to me with your cage. And you did. See, she even tried to imprison me to create opportunities to defeat me. Your rebellious love for her and her struggles against fate have sadly become another catalyst.

Shining: You--even using the hope she found in herself?!

Liz?: Shining? Are you here?

Shining: ！

Liz?: I can feel your breath, but I can't see you…

Shining: I'm here, Liz!

Confessarius: She can't hear your voice, we walk within her broken consciousness—the interior of the cage.

Liz?: Shining… there is a burning name and vague question echoing in my mind, but I can't remember it… Maybe I'll remember it when we leave here. I found myself able to share the pain of others to slow the withering of their lives. You said we would go far away to find a cure for me, and maybe I could cure others in pain on our journey.

Shining: …

Confessarius: The disordered and broken memories are flooding her, and sooner or later she will get lost in them. Perhaps she'll go insane, or will kill herself before that happens. But you already know the solution I taught you, Quesasina.

Shining: …

Confessarius: Draw your sword and destroy the bodies of your blood relatives once and for all. Our souls will be reconnected with your sword as a bridge, and you—will give birth. Give birth to eternal authority. This is a fate you cannot escape. Become one with me and nourish her otherwise shattered consciousness with the remains of your blood family.

Shining: … Liz, forgive me.

Shining clenched the sword in her arms, her hand already on the scabbard.

Confessarius: Finally, Quesasina…

From the scabbard, morning and dusk are about to pour out. But at this moment, a hand held Shining's sleeve.

Nightingale: Shining, I like your current name a lot more.

Shining: Liz…

Nightingale: I seem to have slept for a long time, lost in countless fragments. But I heard your voice, and you guided me to a place buried among the debris. There, I dug up fragments of memories… I still haven't remembered them all. But I remembered the question that should have been answered long ago… I forgive you. I forgave you even before you cruelly sealed my memories away… That's why, I'm angry at you for making these decisions all by yourself.

Shining: …

Nightingale: "Liz", I've always loved the name you chose for me. Don't leave me and bear everything on your own. We made a promise to get through this together—

Shining saw Nightingale's eyes and Nightingale's smile.

When Shining came back to her senses, the hand had quietly slipped from her sleeve.

Confessarius: A tragedy, but the ending is always fixed. Either you kill me and become the breeding ground for the next bloodline, or you watch me take her away and then drown in your regret. It’s all the same, sister. Quesasina, the consciousness of the cage has awakened. If you continue to keep her by your side, she will only evaporate and die like dewdrops in the morning.

Shining: …

Confessarius: I will take her away, I will help you maintain it, I will help you make up for it—I will mold the cage into a crown. Then, you will be, we will be… the eternal devil.

In the end, Confessarius ended up kidnapping Liz.

Kal'tsit: Operator Nightingale is a member of Rhodes Island's Medical Department, and we will not allow her to be kidnapped or harmed. But any rash move may put her in greater danger. After all, the opponent we need to face… is an immortal "Demon King" who has coveted the crown for thousands of years. Quesatushta. He who knocks on the door is he who usurps the king. I was aware of the threat of the Confessarii, even during the Tower of Babel period, and several attempts were made in vain. Theresis concealed them so well that people thought they were only the regent's bodyguards.

Shining: … Please don't worry, I know what we have to do.

Ascalon: You are calmer than I thought. What are you planning?

Shining: Liz… made her own choice. It's a choice that even I would never dare to think of. It is bold and aggressive, but it is the most effective. It seems that I'm always the one who's afraid of failure and dying… What I want to do, ha. It is to catch up with her.

[cookiesupplier]

Every Rose Has Its Thorns - Part Nineteen

pairing: Ricky Olson x ofc x Chris 'Motionless' Cerulli

warnings/tropes: slow burn, soulmates, strangers to enemies to lovers, betrayal, angst, fluff, smut, language, panic attack, stalking, online bullying.

summary: In a world where soulmates inexplicably receive a tattoo that will match that of their soulmate the moment they turn eighteen years old, being famous and covered in very visible tattoos can make finding your true soulmate a questionable fate. For everyone involved.

author’s note: Unbeta'd, readers beware as always lol.

tags:@tearfallpixie @cncohshit @jordynyingling0219 @faceless-mirror @nyxthedestroyerofworlds @wild-child-7747 @witchyweeb34 @black-damask1999 @jilliemiw86 @ilovesamkiszka @lyschko666 @lacktoesandtoddlerants @bngurngheart @collapsedglasshouses @laurpartyprogram

Tag List is Open, please let me know if you would like to be added to it or in general.

Ricky was staying with Chris, which he hadn’t wanted to. When he came down, having finished editing the video, uploading it to YouTube so that he could publish it when he was ready, only for Chris to let him know the plan. He’d argued that he was fine in his own house. He hadn’t worked hard to buy his own fucking house to get run out of it by some fucking insane psycho stalker!

The whole argument had fallen on deaf ears. Chris had just shaken his head, saying that he wouldn’t be staying with him forever, that this was still his house, just until they figured out how to deal with everything that was happening, until all of this settled down. It would all be settled down. Chris assured him, standing there with him, a hand on his shoulder, the other curving around the back of his neck, just helping him breathe for a second. It would be fine.

Talia had taken a deep breath herself watching the guys console Ricky, as much as he fought to stay in the house, something about how he looked as he turned to head back upstairs to go pack a bag so he could stay with Chris, she had a feeling there was a weight off his shoulders. He could argue that he was fine here all he wanted, but he wasn’t, and she didn’t blame him. Realising that you had a stalker, it didn’t matter who they were, it was unnerving. In this case Talia thought  it was worse because Ricky did know Grace, and Grace knew Ricky, and now they knew that Grace hadn’t given up, whether, she thought she could get him back, or she was just trying to ruin his life, Talia didn’t know. Then again, someone as insane as to date him for so long and think he’d never find out she was lying to him, it was possible she thought turning the fans against him, would get him to come back to her. So Ricky packed up a bag of his things, along with some of his equipment, and after he published the video to his channel, headed to go home with Chris. Talia, however, went with Vin and Ava like she had been since she’d arrived, waiting to see how it would fair with the video, how the fans would react. By the time the video went live, it had been quite late at night for all of them, so it was no surprise, that she crashed into a fitful sleep long before she saw any reaction to it.

When Talia woke up, she realised it was mid-morning, and found a text from Ava, telling her that she’d gone into town with Vinny and that they’d be back later that afternoon. So dragging herself to make something to eat, only to hear the door, she sighed, walking from the kitchen, she went to answer it, and saw Rick on the other side of the door, waiting.

“Vin isn’t here, he went out with Ava-”

“Actually, I came to see you.”

She was taken aback. So far, Ricky hadn’t once gone out of his way to want to see her, every time they’d spoken, the party, yesterday, even the diner, had all been circumstances when they’d been put together because of other people, and had to deal with the other person, and now he was here, seeking her out?

“Um, okay, come in, I guess?”

Stepping aside to let him in, while it wasn’t her house, she knew Ricky was more than welcome in Vinny’s house as it was.

“I’m just making something to eat, I only just got up, I, well, I didn’t sleep well last night.”

Talia nervously rubbed her neck slightly, she hadn’t been able to check her phone without being abused in her messages on her social media since yesterday, and honestly, she was scared to check it now, she hadn’t checked her messages since she woke up.

“I haven’t checked my messages since I got up, I know it's going to be crazy, I can’t control how the fans react, all I know was what I said, and I turned the comments off on the video. I told them I would, because of the abuse that came after the live, and how ashamed I am that any of my fans would abuse anyone online, ever. So.”

Walking back towards the kitchen after she closed and locked the door, she doubted that would change everyone, she knew how fandoms got, while there were a lot of good people there could be a lot of bad too. It wasn’t a good thing, even if you could meet great friends, you could meet your worst enemy too.

“What was more important, was, talking to you about yesterday, about how we haven’t really talked, and you were right, I haven’t wanted to. Honestly, because admitting that you’re my soulmate has been, it's been shit through all of this. I have been struggling-”

“I know Ricky, you don’t need to explain that to me-”

“Shit! Will you just stop!”

Rick cut her off as she went to make herself a coffee, and she started a little, going tense as she set the cup that she’d just pulled out of the cupboard on the counter carefully, not wanting to look back at him now and fuck, he ran his fingers through his hair, feeling bad for snapping at her with how she looked right then. Shit... Why did she have to look like a spooked fucking deer, when yesterday she looked like she was ready to slap him into the middle of next week. Where was that girl, he needed her for the moment. But he supposed, at the same time, he needed reminding, why he was here, after what she said yesterday, he didn’t know her, he didn’t know the pain she’d been put through, by her own fucking family. He had so much support around him, from the band, his friends, and even his family from a whole other state, and she had Ava and two friends who couldn’t even be here with her now.

“I’m sorry I shouldn’t have snapped at you, I just, do you always do that? Make excuses for other people's shitty behaviour? You’ve been doing nothing but that for me since we met, haven’t you?”

He’d known he was acting like an ass, but hearing her yesterday, he hadn’t realised just how much of one he was until then. Shit. When Talia didn’t say anything, just stared at him for a long moment, Ricky glanced down at the coffee cup on the counter and shifted on his feet, moving to pick up the cup. When she went to say something, he lifted his hand,

“Let me, how do you like it?”

He didn’t have Ava here to ask, and hadn’t prepared in advance like she had yesterday, so, he went ahead and asked her directly.

“Half cream, no sugar, please.”

Nodding slightly, they both fell silent as he went to work to make her her coffee, while she knew she hadn’t eaten anything yet and any moment her stomach was going to rebel, it was going to have to be satisfied with the coffee, because the thought of eating anything while about to talk about soulmates with Rick, well, the thought made her feel a bit sick. They’d been going around in circles enough, and she was a bit terrified of where this was going to go, not to mention the messages she had seen yesterday, had brought back the worst memories, she didn’t need to go down that path right now.

Once he was done, Rick handed over her coffee, and let her take a sip before,

“Okay?”

When she nodded slightly, he smiled a little, at least he could do something right, even if it was only coffee.

“Good, okay. So, I know I’m fucked up, and I don’t need you making excuses for me, I don’t deserve them, any of them. I don’t deserve them any more than the people in your past do, because I know I don’t know you that well, but from everything Ava says about you, and she talks about you constantly,”

His voice a little deadpanned at that, trying not to smirk at the way Talia’s face turned a bright fucking red when he said that, she did though, Ava had talked Talia up all through their time on tour, even if Rick had tried to avoid any talk of her like the plague it had been impossible in its entirety. He’d be laying in his bunk, and Ava would be talking to Vinny about home, and Talia this, and Talia that, and it had made him want to scream in fucking frustration into his pillow that he couldn’t escape her.

“Then you are an amazing person. Honestly, you’d think you were her soulmate, Vin should watch out, she might have a thing.”

Hearing her chuckle against the coffee much was better than the dead silence, and the startled look she’d given him when he’d snapped at her before.

“There was that moment in college, so maybe, he should be warned.”

“Oh wow, noted, I’ll give him a heads-up.”

Both of them were laughing that time as she drank some more of her coffee, Ricky reaching for another coffee mug as he started to make himself a coffee.

“So yeah, I want to apologise, I realise, like a complete asshole, that I haven’t, for anything that I’ve done, or said to you, pretty much the entire time I’ve known you. How I’ve treated you has been, inexcusable. Even if you weren’t my soulmate, I should have treated you with more respect, especially as my best friend’s soulmate’s best friend, sister even.”

Both of them, standing in the kitchen, with their coffees leaning back against opposing counters and drinking at their mugs,

“Thank you.”

It was nice to hear it, at least. Talia hadn’t ever even gotten an apology from her family. Not that they would ever consider that they were wrong, that she could be right about having a famous soulmate, that was it, not that she’d always known who he was. Kyle and Jordan had known from the start, it was that Ricky was famous. Who was she, what right did she have, to have a famous soulmate when they didn’t? At least that was how Ava put it, that they were all just jealous, what made her special, was that she had a famous soulmate, and they didn’t, why did she deserve something more? She didn’t, she just had a soulmate, a normal soulmate, Ricky. Ricky, who enjoyed music, had been painfully abused by a horrible woman because of it.

“Fuck, don’t thank me, I was an asshole to you, especially at that party, shit. Making you prove it.”

He knew how he was treating her then, just like Grace had been suggesting she was, just someone out to play him, and he felt like utter fucking trash for it. Now she was thanking him for finally acting like a decent human being and apologising? Well, that made him feel even worse.

“Shit, you can’t be real.”

Just hearing him mention that party, even with what he was saying, how he’d treated her that day, Talia was feeling some sort of way, and Ricky’s eyes went wide when he felt the way she was reacting to it, the way his soulmate tattoo started to grow warm. Only the heat wasn’t instant and, well, stabbing like yesterday, it was like a warm slow burn. The warmth was a tingle that sunk into his skin to spread through him, and shit. That was when he saw it, the way her fingers pressed tighter to her mug, her back arched as she stood a little straighter, her thighs, tensed slightly, pressing together under her long shirt, the shorts she wore barely visible underneath.. Oh, and oh that delicate flush of her cheeks..

“Oh, oh Talia..”

The words were so softly off his lips, that he barely breathed them, he wasn’t even sure she heard him, but that wasn’t the point. She had to be some sort of masochist, he was a fucking asshole to her of epic proportions, and she was still thinking about him like that. Swallowing, not that he could lie himself, that day had played on his mind too. He’d thought about her more than once over the past week, enough that that tingle in his tattoo right now was not an unfamiliar feeling… Right now, seeing the way she was rolling her shoulder on the side of her tattoo, remembering how she reacted to the pain yesterday… it was making him wonder.

Did she feel it every time he did?

Did Talia feel what he felt every time he’d felt a surge of sensation in that tattoo?

Fuck, the most memorable had been when they were together, in that bathroom. He’d felt it, the way he brushed against her tattoo, the way he’d let his lips trail over her tattoo, how in that instant he’d felt her come around his cock as he did. Just thinking about it now, he might as well have been buried deep inside of her again, with the way the surge of feeling in his tattoo flared just at the thought, his eyes closed at the soft gasp that escaped her against the mug of her coffee.

“Shit.”

Ricky set his down on the counter before he dropped it and scalding hot coffee went everywhere. He took a deep breath, eyes opening before he moved towards her, taking the mug from her hands and putting it aside, hot coffee, safely out of reach for the moment, and then his hand was curving around the side of her neck, over her soulmate tattoo, just letting his fingers rest there over her skin nothing more, and feeling her shiver slightly under his touch.

“You can feel something, can’t you?”

Dividers by @saradika-graphics

[the-bad-batch-baroness]

Combat Cold Cuts

Tech x Fem!Reader

Summary: Your favorite team of Navy SEALs just docked and are looking for some good food.

Pairing: Tech x Fem!Reader

Characters: Mira (OFC), Tech, Hunter, Echo, Wrecker, Crosshair

Tags & Warnings: modern!AU, sandwich shop!AU, navy!AU, fluff, awkwardness, smidge of angst, military/naval terms and jargon, sad Bad Batch backstories, mentions of death, mentions of war, mentions of injuries

Word Count: 3.2k

Author's Note: If you've been here a while, then you'll know that earlier in the year, when the polls came out, I made a poll asking who from the Bad Batch y'all would want in my Sandwich Shop AU, and Tech had the most votes. So, ta-da! Took me half a year, but better late than never. Also, don't quote me on this, but I may write more for this AU. Also, if you know where the title is from, we can be friends. As always, please enjoy 💚

@clonexreaderbingo Square: Tech

Today begins like any other day for you as you get ready for your job on the naval base. The sky is crystal clear and the sea breeze coming off the coast is refreshing. You’ve been working at the sandwich shop on the naval base for two years now thanks to your friend Mira. You've known Mira since high school, and because she's the wife of a sailor, she lives on base. Her personal recommendation is what helped you get the job and you're forever grateful to her.

You love working on the naval base because you get to interact with all of the sailors. The sailors always have the best stories to tell. Whether it’s their last meal before setting out to sea or it’s their first meal back on dry land, you're always there to smile and laugh at what they say. Sometimes the men are lively and sometimes they're quiet. You can usually tell when something bad has happened while they were deployed, because the normally talkative ones say nothing.

While stopped at the security gate, as you wait for the officer to scan your ID, you can see a destroyer coming into port in the distance. With that class of vessel docking, you know it’s going to be a busy day at the sandwich shop, with lots of hungry sailors looking for good food and someone to tell their stories too. You quickly go through your mental checklist to ensure you properly restocked yesterday, then the officer returns your ID and lifts the gate for you to enter.

“Hey!” Mira calls with a wave and a bright smile as you enter the sandwich shop.

You smile and wave back. "Good morning!"

"Are you excited?" Mira asks as she playfully jabs her elbow into your side when you come around to the back of the deli line.

“For what?” you ask as you rub your side, then throw on your apron.

“Didn’t you hear?” Mira says.

“Hear what?” you ask.

“The Bad Batch are on that destroyer that came in this morning,” Mira answers with a giddy bobble of her head.

“No way!” you exclaim, but quickly hush yourself. “Really?”

“Yup,” Mira says with a pop of her lips on the last letter. “Top scuttlebutt says they’re returning from a super dangerous and top secret mission.”

“Woah,” you breathe. "Incredible."

The Bad Batch. An elite team of five navy SEALs that were pulled together as sole survivors from other teams across the navy. Each member of the Bad Batch has a unique skill set that allows their team to be practically unstoppable in the field. Which is why they are assigned the most difficult missions, because their success rate precedes them. They don’t even use their real names anymore, just the nicknames they've been given over their many years of service.

Hunter, their sergeant, is the only member of the team that began his career as a navy SEAL. He lost his original SEAL team during a special operation involving drug pirates off the gulf of some foreign country. According to sources, he was able to track down the pirates, complete the mission, and bring his dead men back to port for a proper burial. That's how he got the name, Hunter. He's a natural born leader, and there’s not an operation he won’t lead his men into.

Echo, their communications specialist, is a triple amputee and a former sonar technician on a submarine. His submarine was attacked while surfacing from a mission, which is when he lost his right arm and both legs. Unfortunately, the rest of the crew weren't so lucky. He spent a week in a coma, and his best friend he served with died in the bed next to him the day before he woke up. Sometimes you see him sitting by himself at the memorial with two open beers.

Wrecker, their demolition expert, was part of an explosive ordnance disposal unit before a fatal accident. It was supposed to be a routine defusal of a pipe bomb, but his partner misread one of the numbers on the detonator, leading him to cut the wrong wire. Wrecker noticed the mistake and tried to stop him, but it was too late. His partner didn't make it, and neither did the rest of the unit. Wrecker survived, but lost most of his hearing, and all of his vision, in his left ear and eye.

Crosshair, their weapons expert and sniper, wasn't in the navy, but was a scout sniper in the marine corps. The man was born with a cigarette in his mouth and a permanent scowl on his face, and not much is known about his time in the marine corp. However, according to the rumors, his scout sniper platoon was ambushed during a night operation in the tropics. They say he was stranded on one of the islands for thirty-two days before he was found and rescued.

Tech, their cyber intelligence specialist, was part of the cyber command group before he was reassigned to the Bad Batch. While it sounds like a desk job, he was actually involved in combat missions where he provided integrated cyberspace attacks in support of operational plans. Basically, cyber-warfare. Not much is known about what happened to his team, and there aren't many rumors or theories surrounding the circumstances either, so it remains a mystery.

"So," Mira begins with a sly grin, “are you finally going to ask him on a date?”

“Who?” you ask as you pull off the plastic wrap from the condiment containers.

“You know who,” Mira taps your arm. “The smart one with the glasses that you make googly-eyes at whenever he comes in.”

“Oh…” you pause. “That one.”

“Well?” Mira presses while waving a loaf of Italian bread around.

“I don’t know,” you sigh. “Maybe next time.”

“Maybe next time?” Mira scoffs. “Maybe next time? Girl, he could be dead next time!”

You rush to cover her mouth. “Shh! Don’t say that. It’s bad luck.”

Mira mumbles something you can't understand.

"What did you say?" you ask as you remove your hand.

"I said," Mira begins, "they don't need extra help in the bad luck department."

You roll your eyes and return to prepping the deli line for when the shop opens. While it's true that a lot of bad things have happened to the Bad Batch team, none of the members have died themselves. So, is it really the men who carry the bad luck? Or is it another force entirely? You push back the crazy thoughts, because in reality, you're not superstitious, even if Mira tries to convince you otherwise. Instead, you make your conjectures based on the facts in front of you.

One such fact being that the shop opens in ten minutes and there's already a line of hungry sailors outside the locked door waiting to get in. You and Mira exchange a high-five and put on your game faces to tackle the wave of hungry men. There's nothing quite like the midday rush between ten o'clock and two o'clock, but it's even worse when the ships come to port. You know after two o'clock you'll be able to take a well-earned break, but until then it is full-steam ahead.

Sailor after sailor pours into the sandwich shop once you unlock the door. Mira always mans the register and you make the sandwiches. When you first started working at the shop, it was a complete disaster trying to get in sync with each other. There was shouting, crashing into each other, and lettuce all over the floor. But now, the two of you work together like a well-oiled machine, dancing around each other behind the deli line, and communicating like a dream.

Your heart skips a beat when you see the Bad Batch walk into the sandwich shop. The quiet murmurs of the sailors stop for a moment as the SEAL team's stoic presence takes over the atmosphere. The Bad Batch have a big reputation around the base and they've garnered a lot of respect, even from the greenhorns. It's almost like having a few celebrities walk into the shop, but it doesn't last long and the sailors go back to munching and conversing with each other.

You choke down your nerves as they approach the counter and smile. "What can I get for you boys?"

"Large steak and cheese, toasted," Hunter says. "Extra peppers if you can."

"Sure thing," you answer as you make the sandwich. You quickly pop it into the toaster to melt the cheese, then wrap the sandwich in paper, and hand it to Hunter. "One large steak and cheese with extra peppers, warmed, and toasty."

"Thanks, kid," Hunter says before moving down the line to the register.

"Can I get a really large buffalo chicken with extra buffalo sauce?" Wrecker asks excitedly. "And I mean, lots of sauce, and ranch!"

"You got it," you chuckle, then make his sandwich, wrap it up, and hand it to him. "One really large buffalo chicken drowning in buffalo sauce and ranch."

"Aw, yeah!" Wrecker says as he grabs the sandwich. "Thanks a ton!"

You smile and look at your next customer, but he doesn't smile back.

"Large roast beef," Crosshair says. "Make sure the mayo is light and not a single onion touches it."

"Understood," you bristle at his tone, then quickly make his sandwich, wrap it, and hand it to him. "One large roast beef, with a squirt of mayo, and absolutely no onions."

"Finally," Crosshair says as he takes the sandwich. "Someone who can listen."

You let out the breath you were holding in and compose yourself to smile at your next customer.

"Large tuna, please," Echo says. "Extra mayo and no cheese or veggies, if that's alright."

"Not a problem," you answer, then make his sandwich, wrap it up, and hand it to him. "One large tuna, no cheese, no veggies, and extra mayo."

"Thank you, ma'am," Echo says with a nod as he grabs the sandwich and moves down to the register.

"A large cold cut combo, if you please," Tech says. "But I would prefer it if you hold the ham."

"Absolutely," you answer, then make his sandwich, wrap it up, and hand it to him. "One large cold cut combo, but hold my hand."

Tech reaches out to grab the sandwich. "I beg your pardon?"

You look up at him, confused as to what he means. "I'm sorry, did I forget something?"

"You requested that I hold your hand," Tech says. "Are you unwell?"

Your eyes grow wide and your face flushes with heat as you realize the slip of your tongue. "Oh," you stammer. "I'm sorry. I… uh… didn't mean to say… well… I just… um. Have a nice day."

Flustered and embarrassed beyond belief, you rush yourself off the deli line and into the back storage room.

Mira overhears your awkward exchange and waves Tech down to register with a smile. "I can ring you out over here, hon."

Meanwhile, in the storage room, you attempt to pull yourself together. You can't believe you made such a dumb mistake and said something so absentmindedly stupid to the one guy you like, and he's a navy SEAL for crying out loud. He must think you're an idiot, or worse. Although, you're not quite sure what could possibly be worse than being an idiot in front of a man who had perfect scores at the naval academy, but there must be something, and it makes you want to scream.

"Are you doing alright?" Mira asks as she leans against the doorframe to the storage room.

You sigh. "I'll be fine."

Mira walks over to you. "I think I can cheer you up."

"Doubt it," you answer while rubbing your hands against your face.

Mira smiles and pulls out a sticky note. "I got you a date with that smart guy you like."

You peek out through your fingers. "You what?"

"I set you up on a date with Tech," Mira repeats as she waves the sticky note around.

"How did–"

"Ah, ah," Mira stops you. "It's a secret. And by a secret, I mean I just asked him."

Your jaw drops as you throw her an incredulous look. Was it really that easy? All you had to do was ask? Seriously? You're shocked that Mira had the audacity to ask Tech to go on a date with you, but you're even more shocked that he actually said yes. You're not sure how to process this new information, or if you'll ever get your heart to beat normally again. All at once, feelings of excitement and panic intermingle in your stomach and you feel like you're going to be sick.

"Here are the details," Mira hands you the sticky note, a big grin still plastered on her face. "Don't be late."

You take the sticky note from her, and she goes back to the front to continue taking care of the customers. You look at what's written on the small piece of paper, and it's a time and place. The park bench at 1900 hours. You count backwards on your fingers to seven o'clock. Even though you've been working on the base for two years, you still haven't gotten used to military time. You look up at the clock on the wall and see it is two o'clock. At least you have time to get ready.

You spend the rest of your shift trying not to let your nerves get the better of you. You busy yourself with everything possible; to the point where you've swept the floor and wiped the counter ten times already. But you can't help it. You're excited and nervous about your date with Tech. You're not even sure if you know how to go on a date, considering it's been so long since you've been on one yourself. However, you have Mira to help you, so it won't be that bad.

Once your shift is over, the shop has been cleaned and the front door locked, Mira helps you get ready for your date. You explain to her how you feel nervous and how you're worried that you might say something wrong or he might think you're stupid. Mira just smiles and listens as you ramble on, offering the occasional encouragement here and there as she helps you put your hair up. Luckily, you wore some decent clothes today so you don't have to go home and change.

After you're ready, Mira gives you a big hug and a few words of advice. "Just be yourself and you'll be fine."

"Thanks," you say, then separate from the hug.

"Go get em'!" Mira shouts as you open the door to leave.

You turn around, smile, and wave goodbye. Mira knows that you'll call her as soon as the date is over to give her all of the juicy details, but you're happy she's here right now to cheer you on. You close the door to the shop behind you and take a deep breath of the evening air. It's still daylight, since it's summer, and because it's later in the day, you're not worried about sweating or becoming gross from the heat. Steeling yourself, you walk to the park to meet Tech for your date.

As you approach the specified meeting place, you see Tech sitting on one of the benches under a tree. Your heart flutters and your stomach flips as your nerves flare throughout your veins. You try your best to breathe through the anxiety, and you swallow back your fear as you approach him. He acknowledges your presence but doesn't say anything, and then you sit down next to him. You both sit in silence and you fidget with your fingers while trying to think of something to say.

"I–" you both start to say, then stop.

"You first," you both say again, then stop.

You giggle, which helps break the ice. "I've never been good at conversation."

"Neither have I," Tech admits. "However, your colleague was most pleasurable to speak with."

"Oh," you say. "Yeah, Mira is great."

"That is not to say that you also will not be pleasurable to speak with," Tech adds.

You pause for a second as you try to process his words. "Can you say that again, but slower?"

"My sincerest apologies," Tech says. "My military duties require precision of language and I will admit that I get carried away with my verbiage. However, my team finds my speech pattern to be complicated as well, so I would not feel disheartened by your lack of comprehension."

"Uh, thanks," you say. "I think."

"Perhaps I should begin again," Tech says as he reaches out his hand. "I am Tech and it is a pleasure to make your acquaintance."

You smile, shake his hand, and offer your name as well.

Your evening with Tech becomes more smooth as you continue chatting on the bench. Your conversation is filled with quirks from the both of you, as well as giggles from your side, and confused looks from Tech. However, it's nice chatting with someone like him. His speech skills really are incredible and it makes sense why he graduated top of his class at the naval academy. You find him endearing, and the way he gets passionate when he speaks makes you smile.

You carry on your conversation with him for as long as you can; until the sun sets and the lampposts in the park illuminate the walkways for the late night passerby. As much as you don't want to call it a night and leave, you can't help but stifle a small yawn. You try to hide it, but during your brief time with Tech, you've realized that not much goes unnoticed by him. Just thinking about it makes you yawn again, but this time not so subtly, and Tech takes note.

"Perhaps we should adjourn for the night," Tech says. "Your oral reflex and deep inhalation indicates that you are fatigued."

"My what?" you ask.

"You yawned," Tech explains.

"Oh," you chuckle. "I guess I am getting pretty tired. It was a long day at the shop."

"I concur," Tech says as he gets up from the bench. "I assume you will be at your employment establishment tomorrow as well?"

You get up from the bench and stretch your arms over your head. "You would assume correctly."

"Through the power of deduction, will you also be available after you have concluded your assigned duties at said establishment?" Tech asks.

You smile. "Why, yes. That will be the case."

"Then I would like to formally invite you to participate in another mutual discussion tomorrow," Tech says.

"I accept," you answer. "Same time, same place?"

"Indubitably," Tech answers.

"Does that mean yes?" you ask, not understanding the word.

"Without a doubt," Tech explains. 

You smile. "Good night, Tech."

"Good night," Tech says. "Pleasantest of endogenous sensory experiences."

You snort and decide to look that one up when you get home, but only after you call Mira and tell her about the wonderful time you had with Tech, as well as the prospect of seeing him again tomorrow. Although, you highly doubt you'll be able to sleep tonight, since your body feels too giddy and excited to calm down and relax. Mira was right. Life is too short to put off doing things you're scared of, because tomorrow is not promised to anyone, and today is all you may have.

Masterlist

AO3

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[dollyyun]

𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐨𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐠𝐢𝐫𝐥𝐬 | 06

SYPNOSIS: wherein Hwang Stella's life is tangled in a predicament involving her clandestine identity as a racer, her seemingly daily life as the official heir to the Hwang Empire, and seven guys with whom she has a complex history with. PAIRING: non!idols enhypen members x fem!oc. GENRE: 18+ (mdni), reverse harem, chaebols, semi-college, racing, eventual adulthood, eventual enha being f1 drivers, multiple povs and written in fic. WARNINGS: slight violence, expletives, trauma(?) WORD COUNT: 5k+ TAGLIST: @aishigrey @kgneptun

✘ SERIES MASTERLIST ✘

After I revealed the truth to some of the guys, they needed some time to grasp the revelation, and I decided to leave them to it, making my departure. Till now, I haven't received anything from Ni-Ki, Sunoo, or Heeseung. I wonder how they took the truth, as I couldn't decipher what they were thinking yesterday.

I mean, aside from my unfinished feud with Jay, will we finally reconcile and be the way we were before? Truth be told, I miss us. Things were simpler back then.

As for Stella, I guess she didn't have the heart to hear the full truth, given how she quickly took off running. I sigh. Until when will she keep running away? And why the hell do I care?

I brush away the thought, and at the same time, my phone goes off ringing. As I am lying on the couch, I lazily reach out for my phone on the coffee table before looking at the screen. My eyebrows furrow upon seeing an unknown caller.

I decide to answer it anyway. "If this is some scam call, you'd best to hang up before I track you down and make you sorry for even thinking to scam me."

There is a protracted pause before the caller speaks. "It's me, Stella."

I abruptly sit up, my eyes widening, before composing myself. "How did you get my number?"

"Sunoo gave it to me when I asked." Fucking Kim Sunoo.

I rub my temple. "What do you want, Hwang? Need me to tell you how I'm your heroine for saving you that night?"

I can already imagine the scowl on her face. "Now I'm regretting my decision to call you."

"Fine, fine." Curiosity gets the best of me. "What is the purpose of you calling your arch-nemesis?"

I can sense the hesitation. "I need your help."

I don't bother to hold back my chuckle. "My help? I'm honoured, but do pray tell why?"

"If I want to beat Rena, I need to be stronger than her." The fierce determination in her voice sparks something within me. "According to Sunoo, you're great at combat."

A soft smirk unfurls on my lips. "I'm flattered. But why me? I'm not the only one who is great at it. Jake and Jay are great at it too."

The three of us used to head to either mine or Jay's personal gym, and we used to work out and combat against each other.

"You already know why I can't ask them!" She says exasperatedly. "If you don't want to help me, just say so."

"Hold up, Princess. I never said I wouldn't help you."

"So you agree to help me then?"

"With pleasure." My smirk widens. "But you owe me."

She sighs. "What is it that you want?"

"When the time comes, I'll tell you." I glance down at my wrist watch. "It's settled, then. Meet me at my place at eight o'clock sharp. Bring along your swimsuit."

"What? But why─"

"I'm your coach now, aren't I?" I ask mockingly. "As my student, heed my instructions and don't ask any more questions."

It is peculiar yet interesting. Hwang Stella wants to be stronger than Hwang Rena. Even though I'm not one to snoop around, there's a part of me that is itching to find out what dysfunctional relationship Stella has with her family, which lies beneath the picture-perfect facade the Hwangs constantly display to the media.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

I don't want to display my avidity for Hwang, but the thought of me coaching her brings a smirk to my lips. I know for a fact that I can't wait to train her and berate her if she doesn't meet my standard.

Oh, Hwang Stella, you're in for a ride.

"I still don't understand why I need to wear a swimsuit." Stella's annoying voice as she complains brings my attention to her.

I try to view her respectfully, but holy shit, has she been hiding and gatekeeping her curves all this while? I can feel my jaw going unhinging. She is donning a navy blue long-sleeve zippered swimsuit that displays her slender legs and accentuated curves.

"Hey! Sunghoon!" She snaps her fingers in front of my face, bringing me back to reality. "You haven't answered my question."

"As I said," Oh shit, my voice cracks a little. I clear my throat, hoping she won't notice. "Do not ask questions. I'm your coach, so I know better."

"I'm not moving until you tell me why we're here to swim when you know I can't." She ardently says with her arms crossed.

Hwang Stella and her stubbornness will be the death of me.

Nevertheless, I yield and sigh. "The more reason why we should start off by getting rid of your fear of pools first."

"And whose fault was that?" She asks rhetorically, glaring at me with a familiar sentiment.

"Consider this as my repayment." I sigh once more. "But the point is, you have to learn how to swim. What if something similar to the other night happens to you again? What if Hwang Rena succeeds in drowning you the second time and I'm not there to save you?"

She begins to waver at the mention of Rena. But then determination is like fury in her eyes. "I'm not going to let Rena succeed again."

"That's the spirit." I walk towards the pool before descending the stairs, the cool water hitting my skin as I go further down. I turn around to face her. "Let's start off by taking small steps." I extend my hand to her. "Go on."

No matter how much she tries to conceal it, the fear flickers in her eyes, but she eventually descends the stairs, though painfully slowly.

My patience starts to run thin. "We don't have all night, Princess."

She wobbles lightly. "I'm trying!"

I let out a sigh of annoyance before taking steps forward, and before she knows it, I pull her with me as she yells out. "What the hell, Park?!"

"Hwang, we're only like this deep." I show her the current height of the pool, which is like around her waistline.

I can see that Stella is trying her best not to touch me, but her hand always finds itself latching around my bicep. I feel how visibly shaken she is.

Before I can ask, she interrupts me with a firm voice. "Okay, let's go." She slowly removes her grip on my bicep.

"Follow my lead." I don't turn my back on her as I walk backwards, examining her. It feels like I'm teaching a kid instead.

"S-Sunghoon!" She stammers, halting her steps. "It's getting deep!"

I cock my eyebrow at her as I stop. "Of course it is. How are you going to overcome your fear if you're just going to remain in that position?"

The panic in her eyes does something to my heart before I relent and step a little closer to her. "Hold my arm."

She complies, her grip on my bicep tightening with each step I take. Since her head reaches around my neck, the height of the current pool is deeper for her.

"Sunghoon!" The fear in her voice is more than apparent before I am taken aback when she latches her limbs around my figure.

Instead of getting annoyed, I find myself smirking down at her, stopping my movement. "Enjoying ourselves, are we, Princess?"

Stella looks up, the fear in her eyes doesn't fade while her grip on my body tightens. I ignore the fact that I feel her breasts press against my chest. "What do you mean─" It seems that realisation finally hits her as she looks between our bodies. She attempts to let go, but immediately latches her arm around mine, probably realising how deep we're already in.

"Park!"

"What?" I chuckle, slowly moving further. "I quite enjoy this."

"Well, I don't!" She hugs my arm tighter. "I swear I'll kill you in your sleep!"

"You can't kill your coach!" I don't know why the fuck I enjoy this when I should be disgusted by her touch. "Now, slowly let go of me."

"No!"

I sigh. "Hwang, trust me. I'm here with you."

Stella forces out a chuckle. "Trust you? A bit ironic, isn't it?"

"If you didn't trust me, then you wouldn't have called me earlier and pleaded for my help."

Stella seems to be contemplating, as she remains silent. It isn't long before she lifts her head to look at me. I nod my head at her in encouragement before she slowly lets go of me. The height of the pool now hits above her chin. I can see that she's trying her best to fight off her fear.

"Sunghoon." Her lips quiver, and the tone of her voice is something I've never heard her call me before.

"I'm here. Relax." I assure her as my voice comes out soft. "Now, dip your head into the water and try to hold in your breath for as long as you can."

Shaky breaths leave her pink lips before she does what I instructed her to do. I wait for her, my eyes remain fixated on her figure. I begin to count, and once I stop at seven, she quickly rises up to the surface and gasps for air.

But a frown tugs at my lips when I see how panicked she genuinely looks. "Stella!" I try to hold her, but she seems to be fighting me off. It is as though she is reeling from some nightmare. I firmly hold her by the shoulders. "Stella! Hey!"

She stops, and she heaves heavily while her glistening eyes meet my concerned ones. "You're alright, Princess." I tell her firmly, yet I handle her with care as I slowly back her up against the wall.

"I'm sorry, Park." Disappointment is written across her features.

With ease, I lift her up and place her on the edge of the pool. "It's okay. You did great for a newbie."

"But that wasn't enough." She counters, frustration laces her tone. "How the hell do I get stronger if I can't face my fears?"

I stare at her in a new light, an unfamiliar sentiment squeezing my heart. My great nemesis, in front of me, displaying her vulnerability and even trusting me enough for her to want my help. Who would've thought?

"Baby steps, Princess." I tell her, bringing myself to sit next to her. "You can't expect to be good one night. Things take time, especially when you want a perfect result."

Stella takes a quick glance at me before looking back at the water as it ripples. "You're right. I hate that you're right."

Chuckles escape my lips before I can stop them. "I'm your coach, aren't I? A good coach would want the best for his student."

Stella goes silent for a moment before she looks at me again with a faint smile. "You've never called me 'Stella' before."

"And you've never called me 'Sunghoon' before." I counter. "Do you want to continue or end the session?"

Hesitation resides in her gaze before she gives me a firm nod. "Let's continue."

I know better than anyone that bottling up pent-up emotions does no good to me. I tried smoking, but it didn't work. I know that I need to unwind at the gym. Alas, my personal gym is currently under maintenance. I'd usually head over to Sunghoon's gym, but given our fallout, I don't know if he'd welcome me there.

I need to punch something, anything. After what happened two nights ago when my parents suddenly invited me to dinner, I knew that they were up to something. Usually, I would keep up with their schemes, but this time, they've gone too far.

"We know that you've been sneaking around with that Hwang girl." My mother expressed her distaste while her sharp eyes looked at me disapprovingly.

I rolled my eyes as I put down my fork with a loud thud. "You're late to the party, mother. We've already parted ways."

My father cleared his throat, intervening in the cold-staring contest my mother and I were having. "That wasn't the point, Mila."

"That was the point, dear." My mother gritted her teeth. "Our son had been involving himself with the Hwang girl! What would've happened if the media decided to publish their scandalous relationship?!"

"For fuck's sake," I utter under my breath as I pinch the bridge of my nose. "Stella and I were not in a relationship. Even if we were, things between us have long since ended."

I swallow the painful lump in my throat while my heart clenches in dejection. It's been weeks, and I still can't bring myself to go about my day without thinking of her. We weren't anything beyond friends, but why the hell does her leaving hurt?

"If this dinner means the two of you berating me about my own dating life, then I'll gladly leave now."

"Sit down, son." My father ordered sternly, to which I had no choice but to comply. "My goal is not aligned with your mother's."

My mother gasped, clearly offended. "Dear!"

My father ignored her as he kept his piercing gaze on mine. "As you are clearly aware of how the Hwangs have many enemies who desire to bring downfall to their empire, including us, we, as in some of my fellow business associates and I, have made a collective decision that in order to do that, we must eliminate their heir."

My eyes went wide as a socket while a scoff of disbelief left my lips. "Are you suggesting that Hwang Stella be killed?"

"Son, listen─"

"You're fucking mental!" I abruptly stood as my chair screeched on the floor.

My father, however, remained collected. "We're not getting Hwang Stella killed. You see, she is known for her intelligence and her capabilities in the field. She is certainly a unique individual, so that's probably why the Hwangs chose Stella instead of their youngest, Rena, as the official heir."

My frown deepened. "I don't get where you're going with this."

My father leaned forward with two hands clasped. "What we want for her is to be distracted and astray from her duties."

I don't want to continue what my father ordered me or the fact that he threatened me, but he is downright mental. How could he? However, if I don't do what he orders, I'll face the consequences.

I ruffle my silvery blond locks. I'm already stressed out with my issue with Jake, and this adds weight to it. Jake Sim, that asshole. I don't know how long he thinks he can avoid me.

You know what? Fuck it. I press on Sunghoon's contact before putting it on speaker mode.

"Jay?" Sunghoon sounds genuinely surprised.

"Can I head over to your gym? Mine is currently under maintenance."

"Sure." Surprisingly, he agrees, but I can sense that he is hesitating. "But─"

"Thanks." I end the call before he can continue. I turn on the ignition of my Ducati Panigale V2 and pull down the visor of my black helmet before speeding off.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

Arriving at Sunghoon's garage feels familiar. He used to have a massive corner where there was a couch that would fit five people, a mini television, and a mini fridge. But as my eyes trail over to that corner, my heart clenches as it is now an empty spot.

We used to hang out there after we ended our last lectures. I miss how things were much simpler back then.

Knowing my way around, I head inside, walking to the gym, which is facing the swimming pool. As I reach outside the ajar door, I hear music and some muffled voices, which brings a frown to my face.

Am I interrupting something? Is Sunghoon having a girl over?

I shake my head at the thought. He would never do it in the gym, and he certainly would've told me if he had a girl over. Lord knows that I needed headphones to block out the unnecessary noises. Even Stella and I weren't that loud. I've been traumatised once. Never again.

"I don't want to see you stopping, Hwang."

"Give me a break, Park! We've been at it for half an hour now!"

I freeze in my spot as soon as I open the door. Not only do I hear her voice, but with the mirror on the wall reflecting, I see her in the ring with Sunghoon, seeming to be boxing each other.

Pure confusion clouds in my head. Since when did Stella box? And since when did she and Sunghoon get along with each other?

I know I shouldn't pry and just mind my own business, but my curiosity gets the best of me as I head further inside the massive gym. I don't stop until I'm near the ring, garnering their attention with my presence.

"Jay." Sunghoon greets, donning a white tee that is transparent enough to make out the lines of his abdominal muscles, sweat trickling down his skin.

"Sunghoon." I return the courtesy before my eyes shift to Stella, and my heart instantly beats fast. She looks good in her gym fit, consisting of a tank top and black tights. Her lilac hair is pulled back into a ponytail. She looks as beautiful as the day I met her.

Instead of ignoring me, her eyes meet mine. She doesn't seem surprised or anything. In fact, she's hard to read now. But after maintaining eye contact, she looks away from me and returns her attention to Sunghoon. "Again." She says with fierce resolution.

"Feel free to do whatever you want." Sunghoon brushes me off before he starts to charge towards Stella.

It's great that Sunghoon hasn't shown any hostility towards me, but oddly, I can't stand the sight of them being together.

I heave a sigh before heading to the changing room.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

My muscles are screaming at me for a break, but I don't relent. Instead, I pour the remaining pent-up emotions into this impenetrable punching bag with such vigour. It's been awhile since I had properly worked out, given the amount of duties and responsibilities of an heir, which has kept me occupied.

Delivering one last hard bow, I decide to take a little break as I make my way to my water bottle. I wipe the sweat that is trickling down my chin with the back of my hand before I unscrew the bottle cap and down the content.

"Jay." Sunghoon calls for me from behind, prompting me to turn around.

I raise my eyebrow as I see Stella with him as well. "Is it time for me to get kicked out?"

"What? No." Sunghoon eyes me incredulously. "I was wondering if you could be Stella's opponent. As her coach, I need to evaluate her skills."

More and more surprises. "Coach? Since when are you her coach?"

"Been for awhile." A smirk tugs at his lips. "It's fun. I get to annoy her relentlessly with my observation notes and criticisms."

"Haha." Stella rolls her eyes, though she seems to be avoiding my eyes.

"But why?" The question leaves my mouth before I can even stop it.

"Because Hwang here wanted to become stronger." Sunghoon tells me.

Stella lets out a loud sigh before throwing her hands up. "Are we going to spar or not?"

"Patience, Princess." My eyes unknowingly twitch upon hearing his nickname for her. "You don't want to be too confident. Jay is great at combat."

"I'm kind of rusty at it." I place down my water bottle. "Let's go, then."

Even though the distance between Stella and me is discernible, I can't help but look forward to sparring with her. I'd love to see what she has planned in her sleeves.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

Despite the fact that my combat skills are a little rusty, I am tactic enough to block her blows and deliver hits to her, though I am careful enough not to bruise her delicate skin. We circle around each other, my eyes trained on her every movement keenly.

We haven't spoken since we started to spar ten minutes ago, but it seems as though we speak with our eyes instead. Stella looks at me as though I'm just a stranger to her. She doesn't hold back with her attacks and schemes, either.

In fact, she manages to get a good piece of me, landing a hit to my rib. Though my pride is wounded, I can't help but feel proud of her. The Stella I used to know wouldn't dare to hurt a fly.

"You're holding back." Stella takes me by surprise when she decides to break the ice between us.

"I'm not." I deny, appearing nonchalant, but she shoots me a scowl that looks rather adorable.

"He's holding back, isn't he?" She asks Sunghoon without tearing her gaze off my face.

Sunghoon leans against one of the corner poles with his arms crossed and his eyes assessing us. A grin appears on his lips. "Yeah, he is."

"Don't go easy on me, Jay." In a blink of an eye, she delivers a punch, going straight for my face, but I swiftly block her attack, and before she knows it, I lock her arms in my grasps, with her back hitting my chest.

My lips unfurl a smirk as I lean down to whisper in her ear while she struggles valiantly in my grasps. "Are you sure about that, babe?"

"Yes, I am." She grits her teeth and attempts to nudge my stomach with her pointed elbow, but I manage to withstand the pain. "And I'm not your babe."

I release her, and she is quick to turn around before relentlessly attacking me. As I dodge and counter her attacks, I find myself admiring her in this new light. How truly confident and impressive she really is.

"Come on, babe," I can't help but taunt her, finding her being frustrated cute. "Is that all you got?"

Stella charges towards me with the intention of winning, but unfortunately, I've seen this move before. With less effort, after dodging her attack, I quickly grab her with my leg interlocked around hers before I have her pinned to the ground with a thud.

"Give up?" I ask, still smirking as the distance between our faces decreases.

"Never." She grunts, struggling with my strong hold on her body.

"You're playing hard to get." I sigh, enjoying the close proximity between us a little too much.

"Fine! Fine! I yield!" She throws her head to the back and closes her eyes, while her chest heaves up and down from the intensity of our spar.

With reluctance, I release her once more before I offer her a hand, which she accepts as I help her to rise.

"Tsk, I expected more, Hwang." Sunghoon approaches us with a small white towel before he throws it at Stella's face.

Stella shoots him a scowl and uses the towel to wipe the sweat from her face. "But I wasn't bad for a newbie."

"Complimenting yourself, I see."

"She's right." I tell Sunghoon before looking at Stella with a smile. "You did pretty great."

Stella doesn't seem to be expecting my compliment. As if she has transformed into a different person, she looks away from me with a tint of blush on her cheeks. "Thanks."

"Hey, man, thanks for letting me borrow your gym." I pat Sunghoon's shoulder. "I'll get going now."

"Wait." Sunghoon makes me halt my steps. "Do you want to join us for dinner? I ordered for us Chinese takeouts."

"We're having dinner here?" Stella asks Sunghoon with wide eyes.

"Of course. I want my student to have well-balanced nutrition." He gives her a boyish grin before looking back at me. "What do you say?"

"Sure." I find myself agreeing eagerly. Not only do I get to spend time with Stella, though she might ignore me, but also with Sunghoon. I do hope that Sunghoon and I will finally have a talk.

─── ⋆⋅☆⋅⋆ ──

Sunghoon and I exchanged very few words after we stepped out of the gym. All the while I keep to myself and slurp these scrumptious black bean noodles, Sunghoon and Stella often engage in banter. It's a weird sight, because almost everyone knows the two hate each other's guts and can't stand each other.

But I do feel a little jealous of Sunghoon. He doesn't have to be on guard or even worried about being around Stella, whereas I, on the other hand, hesitate to start a conversation with her.

Do I even have the right to speak to her? Will she hate me if I speak to her?

I stand by the balcony on the second floor, taking a smoke break. I inhale the familiar toxic substance, my tongue playing around with the smoke before I blow it out.

"Mind sharing the stick?" Sunghoon appears out of nowhere, startling me. He settles himself next to me.

I raise my eyebrow at him before bringing the stick to my lips. "Get your own."

"I did order for you food as well, so technically you owe me."

Fucking bastard. "Here." I give the stick to him.

I look straight ahead, with nostalgia hitting me. This feels like old times. As much as I hate what happened between us and the cause of it, I miss Sunghoon.

"So, you and Jake?" Sunghoon breaks the ice between us.

"It's been weeks since we last talked or even hung out." I say quietly. "I get that it's my fault for going after his girl, but he's dating his ex's sister, so it's hypocritical of him."

"Were you, though?" Sunghoon gives me a knowing look. "Friends with benefits aside, were you really after his girl?"

Was I? I mean, I always found Stella attractive, but it's her mind and her personality that truly charm me. I didn't want to break the bro code, but I couldn't help with my attraction towards her. I guess I really do like her.

"You don't have to answer me. The look on your face tells me enough." Sunghoon chuckles breathily before stretching out his hand. "First, Jake. Now you? At this point, I could become a fucking therapist."

"What do you mean by 'first, Jake'?"

Sunghoon quickly runs me down about what happened, not missing out on any details. I did envy him a little when he told me that he and Jake had started talking.

"And you know what's funny? It's the fact that everything revolves around Stella now." Sunghoon sighs. "Even the other guys seem to take a liking to her."

"Oh, really?" I ask, clenching a fist. I know I have no right, but I feel fucking territorial right now. The thought of others liking Stella, or worse, getting together with her, feels like a blow to the stomach.

"Yeah." Sunghoon scoffs. "What's so special about Hwang anyway?"

"Stick around her a little longer, and you'll find out." I offer him a smirk. "Careful now, Park. Your feelings towards her might change in weeks or months."

Uncertainty resides in his gaze before he masks it with his usual cockiness. "Trust me, Hwang is not my type."

"I said that too." I shrug my shoulders. "Look where it got me."

Sunghoon shoves me playfully, like he used to. We look at each other before breaking into fits of chuckles.

"I've missed you, man." Sunghoon confesses with a smile after we calm down. "I don't know why the fuck we fought months ago. It's all because of our fathers."

"Agreed." I nod my head. "If they hadn't dragged us into their feuds, we wouldn't have split up."

Sunghoon extends his hand towards me. "Friends again?"

I reciprocate the handshake firmly, warmth fills my tummy. "Friends."

Sunghoon grins at me. "Come here, you." He pulls me into a hug—a hug that I never knew I needed from my best friend.

We hear Stella clearing her throat before we turn to see her approaching us slowly. "I couldn't help but eavesdrop earlier. So, you two are friends now?"

"Sure, it looks like it." I answer her with a grin.

Her eyes flicker at my lips before looking back into my eyes. "I'm happy for both of you."

"As my student should." Sunghoon slings an arm around my shoulder. "It also looks like you have another coach to train you in combat."

"Great. More headaches." Stella rolls her eyes, but a smile tugs at her lips.

"Actually, can I speak to you in private?" I ask, taking a step towards Stella.

Before Stella can reply, Sunghoon interjects. "I'll give you two some privacy instead, but no funny business." He warns us before making his way towards the stairs.

Whereas Stella appears awkward, I don't. I step towards her a little closer, and she remains in her spot.

"I know that we have already cut ties, but I couldn't stop thinking about you." I start off. "I meant it when I said I didn't care that we're no longer friends with benefits, but I still wanted to be your friend. I wanted to be able to talk to you without any complications."

Stella sighs and looks down. "Are you really sure you want to be my friend?"

"Positive." I answer firmly. "I hated how we ended things."

"I'm sorry." She looks up and smiles sadly. "If you knew me, you should've known that I always ran away from my problems or had to face something."

"If you're with me, you won't ever have to run away from anything." I hesitate as my hand stops mid-air, but seeing that Stella doesn't flinch, I brush a fallen lock out of her frame. "I know you're already capable of defending yourself now, but allow me to protect you."

Her eyes flicker down at my lips momentarily. "Jay...."

"Please."

She sighs softly before wearing a small smile. "Okay. So, friends?"

The word itself feels like a cut to the skin, but I force myself to reciprocate the smile. "Friends."

PREV CHAP | NEXT CHAP

[niennanir]

I make it a stern practice not to air my laundry. If I have a problem I can take it to a close friend whose council I trust, there's nothing to be gained from shouting it at the internet. But every once in a while something happens that I feel I can't go without bring up, usually because I think it impacts more than just me.

My mother, whose sharp wit features on my blog with regularity. is nearing eighty, is still working part time, is hard of hearing, and isn't terribly good at being on her feet for long periods of time.

Which is why sending her cross country to visit her grandchildren is always worrying.

I almost always fly her on Delta. This is because when I request wheelchair assistance from any other airlines they have never, ever delivered. Delta manages to have a wheelchair for her about 70% of the time, not good, but statistically better than 0%. Keep in mind that in the US, wheelchair assistance is required by ADA law and based solely on my experience this means that there are multiple violations of accessibility mandates on a daily basis.

Normally even if the airlines don't do their jobs this isn't a problem because I schedule her a longer than average layover so she has ample time to request skycap assistance from the courtesy desk. Always fun because her hearing aids work poorly in loud echoing spaces like airports. Yesterday was not normal.

Her departing flight was delayed, she missed her connecting and was automatically rebooked. Delta should have had someone to assist her but with all the passengers needing to schedule new connections they shuffled her to the side and told her they could help her in four hours.

And that would be the end of my story, and the beginning of my complaint if it weren't for Wayne.

I don't know Wayne's last name. But I know he works at Hartsfield-Jackson Atlanta. I know his job involves escorting unaccompanied minors to their connecting flights through one of the largest airports in the country. And I know he saw my mother, undoubtedly stressed at a long delay, an even longer layover, and the ring of a loud airport in her hearing aids.

Wayne stopped to ask if she was alright. He got her safely to the proper gate for her new connecting flight, he stopped by regularly over the next five hours to make sure she was fine, she was hydrated, she had her phone charged. He made sure she had a seat assignment and an updated boarding pass. It wasn't his job. I'm sure he had to snatch moments between tasks, probably on his break. There were other families relying on him to protect what was most important to them. But because of Wayne my mother made it to my brother's house safe and sound.

It wasn't his job. But the people who should be doing that job just didn't do it. And I'm sure there are excuses that sound good but when we're talking about the safety of a disabled, elderly person those excuses are hollow at best. We can do better, Wayne could do better when it wasn't even his to do.

I can't thank Wayne, I wish I could. I wish I could contact Delta and tell them Wayne in ATL needs a raise, he's stepping up and making you guys look better than you deserve. Knowing the current state of stupidity, they'd probably write him up for not focusing on his assignments anyway. So all I can do it air it here.

Thanks Wayne.

[queen-dahlia]

𝐆𝐢𝐥𝐛𝐞𝐫𝐭 𝐯𝐨𝐧 𝐎𝐛𝐬𝐢𝐝𝐢𝐚𝐧

𝗠𝗮𝗶𝗻 𝗥𝗼𝘂𝘁𝗲: 𝗘𝗽𝗶𝘀𝗼𝗱𝗲 𝟬

I'm can finally rest! I haven't got a wink of sleep since yesterday (இ﹏இ`｡)

Note: Translation is not 100% accurate. Expect grammatical errors.

// : alternate translation

True love—for me, it's my last hope.

I decided not to love anyone anymore.

I decided not to trust anyone anymore.

There is no salvation and no compromise in a world of deceit and corruption in power.

I can't think of any other way to destroy it than by violence.

There will be much bloodshed.

Many will lose their lives.

Still, I decided to literally become the "disaster of the world."

The boy who once loved mankind is dead.

The boy who was heartbroken by the deaths of others is gone.

The plan was going well. Already, the world had progressed to such an extent that the next step would change it.

And yet, somehow, fate was whimsical.

══════════════════

Gilbert: "Rhodolite's Belle?"

Roderich: "Yes. Michael has informed me that you know her. You know, she's been selected as "Belle"."

Gilbert: "Hmm..."

When I heard the story, I felt an unusually strong emotion bordering on anger.

In Rhodolite, there is a "Belle System," in which the king is selected by the person with the most beautiful heart in the country.

One day, a commoner who had been living a peaceful life up to that point is suddenly chosen as Belle, and heavy responsibilities are pressed upon her.

I've always wondered how the selection process works.

But it was just another country. Obsidian and myself were supposed to be uninvolved.

ーUntil she was selected.

Gilbert: "The king is dead, isn't he? By now, the news of the king's death should not be known to the rest of the world."   //   "So, the king is dead. By now, "news of the king's death must not be known to other countries"."

Gilbert: "I wonder if they're saying something like, "You'll have to be the Belle when you find out our secret."   //   "I wonder if they say something like, "You know our secret; you have no choice but to become Belle."

Gilbert: "Poor thing. It's not just me; it's like the Rhodolite is watching you too."   //   "Poor little thing. I can't believe Rhodolite is on you and not just me."

Roderich: "... Your instructions, please."

Gilbert: "Well... I'm just a bystander. Just one of the readers who enjoys listening to the stories she spins."

Gilbert: "It would be foolish of me to intervene in that story, wouldn't it? As usual, I decided to take the high groundー"

Gilbert: ". . . . . ."

Roderich: "Can I help you?"

Gilbert: "No..."

Suddenly, I look down at the papers scattered on my desk.

The scribbled words tell the story of a certain innocent woman.

But the story stops halfway through.

Months went by without any further progress.

(I know her. But that's just a fantasy.)

(I can't let the Obsidian royal family get involved with a mere bookstore girl.)

(But if it's "Belle"...)

(Obsidian has good reason to mess around.)

It was really a whimsical and, at first, deeply unintentional scheme.

If I hadn't heard Belle's story, I would never have thought of it.

(To meet and die, or not to meet and die.)

(Then yeah... I prefer the former.)

Gilbert: "I'm sure there's a goodwill meeting coming up soon for Benitoite and Rhodolite?"

Roderich: "Yes, there is. They will be held exactly as in previous years."

Gilbert: "I see... Yeah, that's good."

Gilbert: "Roderich, please notify them that Obsidian will be participating this year."   //   "Roderich, please inform Obsidian that this year we will also participate."

Roderich: "Yes."

Roderich: "... Yes?"

Gilbert: "I'll go. I just want it to be held at Rhodolite."   //   "I'll go. But I want the venue to be held at Rhodolite."

Gilbert: "Benitoite is a long way away, and I'd rather stay in Rhodolite than anything else."

Roderich: "... Are you insane?"

Gilbert: "Oh, man, have I ever been insane?"

Roderich: "No. But I think "the doctor" will stop you."

Gilbert: "Don't tell anyone."

Roderich: ". . . . . ."

Gilbert: "I'm just being selfish for the last time, okay? I want to see the little rabbit."

Roderich: "What are you going to do when you see her? With all due respect, Sir, meeting Prince Gilbert isー"

Gilbert: "I know. It's just hell for her."

Getting involved could drag her down into a swamp of malice and turn her pure and beautiful heart black.

Knowing all of this, I chose my first and last private desire.

(Because I'm a big villain, you know.)

Gilbert: "Get ready, okay?"

Roderich: "At least, I'm going with you."

Gilbert: "Do whatever you like."

I invented all sorts of villainous reasons and purposes to meet her later on.

Instead of just "meeting her for a purpose", it's "fulfilling a purpose to meet her".

No matter what happens, the fundamental principle remains the same.

I didn't realize at the time that it seemed like a small difference, but it was a big difference.

══════════════════

(Well... So that's how I came to be at Rhodoliteーー)

The first thing I did when I came to the castle was to intentionally get lost.

The map of the castle had been drilled into my head by the information of the spy who had come to the castle and snuck in. 

It is easy to guess the room assigned to the little rabbit.

(I knew they wouldn't let me attend the goodwill meeting, but that turned out to be a bad thing.)

It's no wonder that Rhodolite took a back seat.

They must not have dreamed that the Prince of Obsidian would know Belle.   //   They must not have dreamed that the prince of Obsidian knew Belle.

I knock on the door, suppressing my feelings.

Emma: "Yes, who is it?"

Gilbert: "Oh, I knew there was someone there. I'm sorry, but may I ask you something?"

The door opened fearfully - and the woman who came out from inside was totally different from what I had imagined.

That's funny. "He" gave me the impression that she was a little younger...

She was an adult woman with clear eyes that were not stagnant at all.

I put a smile on my face so that she wouldn't notice my slight turmoil.   //   I put a smile on my face so that she wouldn't realize how slightly upset I was.

Gilbert: "Good evening, young lady."

Emma: "You are?"

Gilbert: "I'm not much to call myself, but I'm in a bit of trouble."

The woman is clearly alarmed and frightened.

Although I did not identify myself, she seemed to sense that the presence in front of her was "evil".

(You have a keen intuition. As expected of Belle.)

She has a good eye for people - and the impression I get from hearing about her and seeing her in person is different.

Gilbert: "I came to the castle to attend the goodwill meeting..."

Gilbert: "While admiring the interior of the castle, I got separated from the servant who was supposed to be my guide."

Gilbert: "It’s a bit embarrassing, but I’m a little lost."

Gilbert: "There isn’t much time before the meeting starts, so I just knocked on the first door I saw light peeking out from."

Gilbert: "I'm so glad you're here."

A woman with a face as lovely as a little bunny rabbit puts on a beautiful smile for an unknown man.   //   The woman with a lovely face, like a little rabbit, gives a beautiful smile to the unknown man.

She seemed to have made up her mind.

Gilbert: "Are you... a noble daughter from Rhodolite?"

Emma: "Yes. I am staying at the castle for my studies."

(Lies.)

Gilbert: "I see. I hear that women who have studied in the castle are sometimes promoted to the bureaucracy. You must be a very talented woman."

Emma: "I'm sorry. My butler will be back shortly, and when he does, he will show you the wayー"

Gilbert: "Yeah, I've decided. I'll let you show me the way."

Emma: "Uh…"

Gilbert: "This must be some kind of fate. Of course, you'll join me, right?

Of course, by this time, I was already thinking bad things.

When I met her, any faint hesitation I had disappeared.

(Because she looked more "beautiful" than I had imagined...)

(If it's going to get dirty, I'd rather get it dirty myself.)

══════════════════

Guard: "O-Obsidian's first prince, His Highness Gilbert von Obsidian, has arrived."

With a clang and the deliberate sound of a cane, we enter the hall of the goodwill meeting.

Just like that, the numerous royalty and nobility gathered there all fell silent at once.

Gilbert: "Ahaha, we look like the center of attention. I feel like I just became the main character."

Emma: "You..."

Gilbert: "I'm Gilbert, the first prince of Obsidian. Nice to meet you, Little Bunny."

(Now let the evil begin.)

══════════════════

Luke: "ーAnd?"

Gilbert: "Hmm?"

The next day, I visited Luke's room on a whim.

The new prince of Rhodolite sat by the window, unafraid of the arrival of the prince of Obsidian.

He is yawning carelessly. **

Luke: "What made you decide to come to Rhodolite?"

Gilbert: "Well..."

(I honestly don't want to be asked why.)

"I want to meet Miss Bunny," but "I still don't know why I want to meet her."

I was interested, I was curious—it doesn't quite fit into words.

(There are things I hope to see from the little rabbit. Some things I'd like to see through her.)

(I can explain it however much I want, but what is it? This feeling...)

(... I don't understand. That's weird.)

All emotions are wrapped up in a smile, and an index finger is placed on my lips.

Gilbert: "Secret."