#yes that is a thing

[ax3-e0ns]

I feel like Patton would feel so guilty when he saw Remus after that

I mean, he would... but also everyone would be confused by this bc he does take on the role regardless of knowing.

(click the image for full resolution)

[ofcoffee-andletters]

FFXIV Write Day 23 - On cloud nine

HaurcheWoL NSFW heavily implied

On Cloud Nine :to be extremely happy and excited :feeling or showing pleasure

———————

Brucie hadn’t really voiced his curiosity, mostly because he felt like if he asked the owner he would get another cryptic and weird answer that left him without an actual answer — so he waited for a bit…

And then for another bit.

And then, one night, as he was walking down the street with Haurchefant at his side, he asked — “Haurche…I have a very stupid question that I have no idea if you have an actual answer to…”

The ex-Commander of Camp Dragonhead looked down at his small husband and crossed his arms, “Oh? It’s so rare of you to have doubts that you consider I am able to answer���so ask away my dear!” At such enthusiasm, the miqo’te couldn’t help but let out a small laugh.

“Well, you know the Forgotten Knight — the little tavern, well…not that little I guess. The point is that, I have always wondered about their inn…” Brucie noticed how his husband immediately had a small smirk on his face and he had to give the elezen a small slap on the arm, “…Hear my question before thinking any of your debauchery!”

The tall knight couldn’t help but laugh taking a few steps forward, “I am doing my best to behave, my Light…but yes, go ahead.”

As the miqo’te makes a pout and shakes his head, he smiles softly, “Anyway, the inn…the name. Do you have any idea why they called it Cloud Nine…?” He finally asks and, of course, he tilts his head to the side in a common sign of his curiosity being completely genuine.

Haurchefant stares at the smaller man for a moment, he crosses his arms and then uses one to cover his mouth as he thinks about the question he has been asked — in his eyes there’s a hint of playfulness and a dangerous shine. “Oh? You want to know that…? Have you tried asking the owner…?”

“Why would I ask the owner when he is always cryptic about anything and, I wanted to ask you…” Brucie moves his arms to his hips, in a show of irritation and lack of patience. “Do you know or not…?”

The knight chuckles and grabs the small miqo’te by the arm, beginning to guide him towards the tavern that was the source of his husband’s curiosity. “Oh I do know, but I think you need a more hands on lesson about the name, rather than just me explaining why everyone called it that long before it got the actual name…”

The Warrior of Light was now more confused, blinking and calling out the name of his husband in an attempt to make him stop his walking and just tell him the reason — he didn’t mind the theory before the actual show, or whatever Haurchefant wanted to show him or do.

…Alas, he found himself soon crossing the door of the tavern and towards the Inn.

————————

Whenever they stayed at Ishgard, for a day or more, they had a house where they could spend the night or, also, they could stay at the Fortemps manor at any time…and yet, as the Warrior of Light opened his eyes and looked to the side…he didn’t really minded the slightly more old covers, or the abused mattress under him…he cared even less about the faint sound of the patrons walking up and down the stairs.

It was a cold room, colder than most.

But he felt, absolutely, on cloud nine right now…held closely by his husband, his body still aching in all the places Haurche had used his strength to keep him pressed against the bed. And Brucie loved those little reminders, the little burns as he moved to kiss Haurchefant’s cheek and then continue to leave soft and small kisses along his face, down to his jaw.

Hearing his husband laugh, groggy and content, made his heart soar. “…Good morning, my love.”

“Good morning, Haurche…” He purrs, laying atop his husband’s chest and drawing soft invisible patterns over his skin, “You seem happy…remembering all the things you said and did last night…?”

Haurchefant sighs, a smile coming to his face, “…Why, yes…and also remembering your sweet moans and face…along with the way you begged for me. Such memories are almost enough to make me want to pin you down once more…but, I fear I might push my luck too much.”

The miqo’te closes his eyes and smiles, soft and content, “I admit…I liked it far more than I anticipated it…we should have more lessons about the history of certain places in this manner…” He sighs. “…I promise I won’t forget this one…dearest.”

The knight hugs the smaller man a bit tighter and then kisses his forehead, “Anytime you have questions about Ishgard, my beloved…I would be more than happy to give you a proper lesson about it…”

Silence reigns for a moment as Brucie moves to kiss his husband for a second, wanting to thank him for indulging his curiosity and, of course…because he can’t handle not being all over him at any given moment whenever they have time…though… “…I may have…another question right now, Haurche.”

Mayhaps they weren’t going to leave bed today either, too busy enjoying their little moment on cloud nine, in more than one sense.

[centipedve]

flat earth is literally nothing we want flat earth truthers to go up against inside out earth truthers right now it would be so fucking funny

[pinyatapix]

most funniest sudden deviation from a youtuber’s typical video lineup i’ve seen in recent memory

like bro imagine being SO pissed at the direction a show had taken that you have to momentarily quit spongeposting in order to talk about it for two whole hours. king shit

[some-pers0n]

I hate how people will look at popular indie artists who had one or two songs go viral on TikTok and start making fun of anybody who listens to them. "Oh you listen to Lemon Demon, Will Wood, Jack Stauber, Glass Animals, and Mother Mother? Tsk, don't you know that is stupid TikTok neurodivergent white transmasc preteen music? It's so mid and bad you should listen to real music–" you are a pit of misery

[anthropologist-on-the-loose]

I'm as grateful for cellphones as the next person, but sometimes I think about how everyone having a phone on them at all times really did cause us to loose some things as a society. I mean - for example, kids these days will never experience their car breaking down and needing to find the nearest place with a phone they can use. They're never going to have the opportunity to tentatively approach a house only to discover that it's full of queer people having a party hosted by a transvestite to celebrate his creation of a sex homunculus, stay the night, and loose their virginity while unintentionally partaking in cannibalism. It's tragic, that kind of gay sexual awakening just doesn't happen these days because of cellphones.

[carsonjonesfiance]

“This thing is legally dubious and therefore technically unenforceable.” Is not a “useless liberal gotcha” it’s how legalism works in this country. Tying up stupidly worded EOs in court is the quickest way to keep them from being implemented. It is the definition of “doing something.” But it doesn’t usually involve much tweeting so of course a certain type of leftist feels obligated to mock it.

[inkskinned]

please i love you i'm begging you bring back suspension of disbelief bring back trusting the audience like. i cannot handle any more dialogue that sounds like a legal document. "hello, i am here to talk to you about the incident from a few minutes ago, because i feel you might be unwell, and i am invested in your personal wellbeing." "thank you, i am unwell because the incident was hurtful to me due to my childhood, which was bad." I CANT!!!!

do you know how many people are mad that authors use "growled" as a word for "said"? it's just poetics! they do not literally mean "growled," it's just a common replacement for "said with force but in a low tone." it's normal! do you hear me!! help me i love you please let me out of here!!!

[goomyloid]

The remorseful player

[ofswordsandpens]

idk why people get super pedantic about the movie logic in Home Alone and start and try to pick it apart, because like, its a Christmas movie about a child accidentally being left home alone, the premise isn't exactly asking us to suspend our disbelief that much, and yet nearly every single "gotcha" question I see people bring up about this film is literally answered within the first 15 minutes :/

[scionsthings]

Rewatching Arcane

[crabussy]

hi gang. reminder that we are some of the best sweaters in the animal kingdom (second only to equines) allowing us to stay cool and keep moving in hot weather. we have 10 times the density of sweat glands compared to other great apes.

we are ALSO insanely good at smelling rain (specifically geosmin, found in the soil and activated by rain) with the ability to smell 10 parts per trillion. this is speculated to have helped our ancestors survive!

we ALSO have absolutely batshit diets compared to most other animals. caffeine and chocolate are completely toxic to most animals but we can eat it without even feeling sick. even avocados are severely toxic to many animals to the point where it can be fatal to eat, but humans love it!!!

we are ALSO some of the best endurance runners ON EARTH out of ANY other species. we can beat horses in endurance running. you know, the animals that gradually evolved away most of their toes in order to be the best runners?? yeahhh.

and to top it all off. our lifespan is unusually long for our species' weight/mass. in many cases, the bigger a species is, the longer its average lifespan (e.g. domestic mice live for 1-3 years, bowhead whales can live over 200) but we're very small for how long our average lifespan is. big cats like tigers live around 14-15 years, brown bears 25 years, yet here we are expected to live around 75-85 years. that is NUTS.

humans as a species are so extremely cool. it's not just our intellect that makes us amazing. we may not be the fastest or the strongest in the animal kingdom but we're super cool in many other ways. next time you sweat you can go wow!!! humans are so cool I'm able to keep moving because of my absolutely insane number of sweat glands! thank you evolution!

[chamerionwrites]

When will someone gently take all the internet food bloggers by the shoulders, look into their eyes, and explain that coconut milk is not a neutral-flavored dairy substitute

[goldensunset]

advice i think we should tell children is that when adults say stuff like ‘now that i’m an adult i get really excited about stuff like coffee tables and bathrooms and rugs etc’ they don’t mean ‘and now i don’t care about blorbo and squimbus from my childhood tv shows anymore’ bc your average adult still loves all the same pop culture stuff they always did; they just have a greater appreciation for the mundane as well. growing up just means you can enjoy life twice as much now. you can get really excited about a new stuffed animal AND about a new kitchen sponge. peace and love

[palukoo]

three hearts that beat as one | old hollywood throuples anyone???