#yes she's in pain again
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I think depictions of Anya being cruel to Curly or drawing out his suffering are artful and chilling but completely miss the point of the story and her character.
I'm not saying she doesn't deserve to have that "I told you so" moment with him but not in something callous or cold. Even if that is how it happened, she'd immediately feel guilty cause at that point she's not tormenting her tormenter or even the person truly at fault. She's doing something cathartic, similar to how Jimmy likely hits Curly to release rage he can't against the rest of the crew. She'd see herself as no different when she'd come back from the moment and see Curly cowering at her. She wants someone to take responsibility but how does being cruel to the defenseless help? Why would she want the power Jimmy has over her over Curly?
The idea of her extending someone else's pain is just so against the struggles she already faces and how she can't even bring herself to cause someone pain even to help them. Her very desire is to release herself from her own suffering and I doubt she'd even fine some sort of guilty release in being cruel to another.
#anya is not a character i see taking agency or indulging in cathartic behaviors#not knowingly like i see her as a character trapped in her head and maybe in the scenario she's cruel to Curly she is envisioning Jimmy#in his place but its not a story about justice or those deserving of punishment and those not like its the opposite of people projecting#their issues on the wrong people and saying things to the wrong people and doing things they shouldn't but anya uniquely falls out of it as#she is subjected to a lot of it but it is also not something she wants to subject another person to like you are doing what Jimmy does and#placing ur rage into another persons and viewing their actions through your eyes like she'd more likely yell at him than do harm or#cause him more pain like at least make it in character#but also she clearly doesn't want to see jimmy or curly in the same light and doesnt because she still repeatedly goes to Curly for comfort#and protection and god there's like concepts that need to be applied to characters individually and then the story as a whole#we can not view the game through only one themed lens less we forget to inspect the compounding factor of Anya is so much more than girl#that needs to be allowed to go off but a woman that simply wants right to be done by her and no more harm like she doesn't want to be aroun#the suffering like idk but some of yall would just benefit from like understanding that people are inherently grey with the capabilities of#black n white thinking or actions#mouthwashing#mouthwashing game#anya mouthwashing#i like her the most but then again i am defensive of all women in media and hate when people change the way the character would take agency#for themselves like yes I want her to tweak out but she just wouldn't and I like seeing realistic depictions of a woman suffering the way#she is like shes not the type at the end of the movie to have a one liner but feel a shallow freedom cause she needs to realistically heal#idk but its just like there is an obbsession forming with making her character her pain and not how she handles and navigates the issue
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Reuniting with a distorted past.
Extra:(New personality tested gone wrong)
wanted to play with rin living in the aftermath aus aswell and had these drawings laying around to share so yay
Panel 1: Was buried alive.
Comic 1: Who are you supposed to be?
new friends
Comic 2: Misguided protection.
obito still sensing the warning signs of rin losing her temper. anyways they proceeded to be dragged into the ocean by rin like some sea monster
Comic 3: Finding out (Now what will you do?)
obito is harshly brought back from his delusions because now its not just kushina but rin too who he needs to ripped out the tail beast from
#naruto#naruto fanart#kakashi hatake#rin nohara#obito uchiha#naruto sukea#fanart#art#my art#sketch#drawing#digital art#hope i can add something new and if not may i shall add fuel to the fire for rin!! :)#So Rin loses ALL of her memories forever (kinda)#the only thing that remains for sure is the feeling of missing something that she'll never reach it again#she's alone and is left to roam directionless until she meets an elderly civilian that is also alone#she stays with her for a year+ but she passes away. But Rin with her new identity decides to walk forward (with love comes pain#but to love at all was the greatest thing to her.) She cherishes her new memories and won't let it stop her from moving on#inbetween this time frame she meets isobu in her mind after he gains enough form within her (who is also without memories)#Now WAY LATER she meets Sukea who looks like he's about to panic and she tries to help (which uh doesnt work too well)#but then Sukea joins her on her travels (sending minato an letter through his summons of rin being alive and forgetting the mission)#they both wander around (he doesnt know how to bring up their past) but then obito appears (always at the wrong times)#At first glance he's pissed but then realizes that this isnt fake AND its both the worse thing yet best thing to ever happen#Now Rin thinks she made two new friends who give her feelings of warmth but they both also reminded her of something old she thinks#PS Minato and Kushina are freaking out back in the village but can't do anything about it (Obito hasn't acted on his plans yet so yes)
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Apologies AU - Good Ending Drop
Hey, everyone. It was my goal to finish Apologies in tandem with the Tournament, but for health reasons, I won't be able to as I planned. Because I tied the story to the tournament and don't feel like untangling it again and making everyone wait more, I'm going to give you all the ending spoilers, as I promised I would if I became unable to finish the story.
What I'm about to describe is THE Good Ending. The True Ending I had planned out almost from the beginning!
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In the main-verse...
Susie, who sees too much of herself in Adeleine, decides to take matters into her own hands to bring the girl's older brother back.
She takes the vial of Dark Matter Swordsman DNA that was harvested from King Dedede. Meta Knight catches up with her and argues against it. It's foolish, dangerous, and liable to be nothing but painful to all parties involved. But Susie anticipated interference and asked Zan to bodyguard her. When Zan arrives (late) to the lab, the argument has caused the vial to begin to react to all the negativity in the room. Zan recognizes its contents as Dark Matter and insists on calling Lord Hyness, who in his own quirky way, analyzes their problem and suggests that while the contents are too weak to survive on their own, a resurrection could be possible, using Void's powers to mimic a hive queen, supplying whatever creature emerges the power to survive on Popstar without burning up into ash...
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In the tourney-verse...
White-Haired Noir is at peace with his life and has come to accept the death of his precious little sister many years ago, but...a part of him still wishes to make Adeleine happy.
Using his fairy-born dimension sight, he discovers an Alternate Noir who is 98% percent compatible with main-verse Noir. This is the Purgatory!Noir from the Re_Birthday post. And he drags this unstable, utterly clueless Noir out of this peaceful void without his permission and secretly "volunteers" the massively confused, un-alive but un-dead teen boy for the Kirby OC Tournament.
It is White-Haired Noir that is the "good" voice on phone and in Noir's head, encouraging rationality. His goal? Get Noir some friends. Get him to face up to/open up to people about his past. And get him caring about his life enough that he wants to live...!
White-Haired Noir has seen what the main-verse Star Allies are attempting and knows that the odds of them actually bringing "Noir" back instead of just an emotionless monster are low without a compatible "Noir Soul" (haha) to inhabit the new vessel.
Over the course of many in-tourney events, including Noir learning to have faith in the sibling bonds he built with Gooey despite being Dark Matter at the time, learning to separate himself and Adeleine as individuals instead of clinging to her to his own neglect, privately opening up to King Dedede, who put the pieces together post-possession, about some awful stuff Noir put up with for years in secret from Raquelle's father (who privately loathed Neichel AND her kids and took it out on Noir) to "pay" for Adeleine's good life...
And lastly, using the power of wishes to interrogate if THIS Noir's true wish is to die and be free, to have never been born, to have had a normal "perfect" life, or if he simply wishes for a second chance to be with those he cares about... White-Haired Noir determines that Tourney!Noir is ready and reveals his plan to him. Noir confesses to him that he really does want to live and be with his family again and offers up his stronger soul for Susie and the gang's vessel.
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Back in the main-verse...
The experiment is a success! They have brought, well, something back. It is not quite like Dark Matter Swordsman in form, nor is it exactly a human boy. It looks a little bit like a spiky haired-Gooey.
After some tense questioning of the emotionless, memoryless, unresponsive goo, it...suddenly seems to awaken. With the voice of a deeply shaken and scared young boy, the violet-eyed blob questions the mad scientist, cultists, and masked man surrounding him... Where the hell is he? And where are his little brother and sister?
Meta Knight welcomes Noir back to the world of the living.
Later, after Noir has time to dress himself in an appropriate scarf, Adeleine and Gooey are brought in and it is a happy and tear-filled reunion all around as Noir confirms that, while this form is strange, it's not dangerous and he's not in pain. He is then re-introduced to King Dedede, whereupon it's revealed that even though Noir likes him, he's still a snarky teen punk at heart, as he sasses the king horribly. (Dedede has gained another kid, but at what cost? XD)
...And that's it.
That's the ending to Apologies I've held onto for nearly a year.
For reading through all that, here is a short comic I drew a while back of the reunited family having a snowball fight in White Wafers.
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(Not to unnecessarily over-explain the story but because the comic is a little vague, I have to tell you that no, Noir does not ever return to human after his revival. I meant it when I wrote in several places that their parting on Shiver Star was the last time they'd see each other "...in this form." This is merely meant to depict a moment in which Adeleine, seeing her brother alive and smiling and laughing and having real fun for the first time in so long, is able to imagine his old self smiling and is at peace that her brother is finally free from the hurt and misery he bore up with for so long.)
(...And yes, he has a long, silly tongue just like Gooey. Which is why he hides all but his eyes behind the scarf. Gotta keep up that cool older brother look even as a little goo creature! While Noir can't become human - frankly, he doesn't miss having a human body, given the stuff in his adolescence and being over-stressed, underfed, under-slept and just overall sick all the time in his later teens - he does eventually acquire the ability to shift into his old "Swordsman" form for short bursts of time.)
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(Lastly, you might wonder how I could have had this exact ending in mind from almost the beginning when so much of it is tied up in recent posts like the tourney? ...Well, originally what was going to happen to allow Noir to be properly resurrected into the Dark Matter Goo body is that the Dream Rod from Star Allies was going to appear in response to a grieving Adeleine's wishes to see her brother again, bringing Noir-as-Swordsman back. At least for a LITTLE while, as it would be revealed that with Zero dead, Noir, who was entirely composed of Dark Matter at this point, couldn't survive on Popstar. Every moment he was there, his body was burning.)
(Still, he lasts long enough to have one final talk with Adeleine that helps heal him from the torturous events of DL 3 - in which we learn a highly disappointed Zero drove Noir to the absolute breaking point, shattering his mind and his newly regained soul. Adeleine also tells Noir she has finally realized everything he did for her during their childhood and apologizes to him for not seeing it before. With dawn on the horizon, Noir asks to look over Adeleine's sketchbooks with her before the end... He dies one last time, peacefully, while Adeleine finally gets to properly mourn him.)
(Then, all the "main-verse" sections proceed to happen as stated above!)
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(...Okay, okay. One last thing. There was also an alternate ending planned where Magolor, taking advantage of the fact that Merry Magoland was built on a nexus point, finds a way to reunite Adeleine and White-Haired Noir - still a teen in this version - using his theme park as a union point, as special birthday gift for Adeleine.)
(I was kinda fond of this one for reuniting the timelines, but it opened up a lot of questions such as, if Magolor made it so that Noir and Adeleine from two different dimensions can see each other as long as they're both in Magoland, could others from the WH Noir-verse see the main-verse this way? It invited too many questions, so that's why I scrapped that one and just let White-Haired Noir grow up instead.)
#Apologies AU#Noir Fontaine#PS: going to be on posting hiatus for a bit#To make a long story short this is the fourth(?) time in a year I've had serious wrist pain. And it's BOTH wrists this time ._.#Possibly carpal or radial tunnel - which I don't want - so I'm cutting out all drawing and non-work writing for a few weeks#But I'm tired of the same ol' song and dance of putting the happy resolution off again and again and again...#...and I'm worried about getting distracted playing catch-up when I come back so ...You get the ending NOW!!#(Want to keep this post clean so all you get about the background stuff in Noir's adolescence is heavy context clues)#(Speaking of background things - after 02's destruction Raquelle's damaged soul is left wandering the void...#...she is salvaged by Drawcia who is herself part Dark Matter and has been 'repainting' discarded Dark Matter shells)#(Mistaking Raquelle's memories of '...girl...painting' (Adeleine before she was attacked) she assumes she is an artist and...#...makes her a brand new body out of the remaining dark matter and adopts her under the name (yes) 'Vividria.')#(Vividria and Ado meet in Star Allies and though Vivi has no memories they immediately become super close once more!)#(Adeleine doesn't know it's her but Noir will eventually put two and two together - though he doesn't press the issue)#(So yeah! Things basically end happily for most everyone!)#(As for Neichel and Rim they probably ARE watching from heaven - sorry Noir!! - and happy to see their kids happy!)
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All I’m going to say I think now that my brain remembered part of what it was thinking is that Taylor and Joe went through a lot together (good and bad) and regardless of how it ended or what led to it they both seem to be determined to keep that private and not throw each other under the bus and in the end they’re just two very, very different people whose outlooks in the long term were just never going to align and never has that been clearer.
#I AM NOT DEFENDING HIM JUST TO BE CLEAR#I’m just saying… he said a lot of nothing in those quotes beyond ‘people on the internet suck’#which is true#and both he and Taylor are keeping things close to the vest about it all#and just seems to me that whatever they went through together they are determined to keep it between them so that’s the end of that#(again in contrast to how she has no qualms about reading m for filth)#he’s just some guy and now he gets to be just some guy forever#and she gets to be extraordinary#like yes the loving committed thing raises eyebrows given how much pain she was in#but like he could have shaded her about how it ended too and he didn’t#AND I AM NOT DEFENDING HIM#we know he was a terrible partner and she felt like shit#I’m just saying neither of them want to delve into the specifics and i think they’re just moving into footnotes in each other’s lives now#like i want to make it clear AGAIN I am not condoning anything on his part here — clearly there were huge issues#I’m just saying just because he may have sucked as a partner doesn’t mean the internet being cruel isn’t also true idk#and yes it’s transparent why he’s choosing to speak out now (or rather why the Sunday times is choosing to reach out to him now)#but like… idk i just can’t muster up any feeling about this man one way or the other lol#and take cues from Taylor (and even him) she’s determined to keep it between them other than the broad strokes#so I’m following her/their lead#(like I have thoughts about why but that’s not important and ultimately is just… it’s the most normal of ltr breakups)#like he just sounds a little pretentious with his ‘real life’ which like… good on him keep living that real life you do you dude#meanwhile his ex is flourishing with every passing week and milestone and is living her unabashed best life#and they’re probably both happier for it now
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I've seen many people say Alicent walking away from Aegon, as well as other scenes of her failing to comfort her kids is her "lacking empathy" or something along those lines
I've seen a lot of people say that empathy is a basic human trait, and that "anyone" would've gone to him and provided some form of comfort (e.g hugging, apologising, etc.)
NEED people to recognise that not everyone shows empathy the same way. That not everyone recieves empathy in the same way. There are many reasons to as why Alicent walked away, 1. Maybe she was worried she would only make things worse. 2. maybe she thought he preferred to be left alone.
We can see very clearly the emotions of pain on her face. She wants to help but doesn't know how, she's not really close with her children. So she doesn't know if her providing him comfort by hugging/her presence in the room with him would make things better or worse. E.g, myself- I love my friends and family dearly but sometimes when I'm grieving I need to be left alone and someone coming to talk/hug/be with me, regardless if their intention is to help, will honestly make things worse than better.
There is no one way to show empathy nor one way to receive empathy. I don't think it's fair for people to say this about Alicent when we don't know at all if it would've helped. In my opinion it's a very black and white view of something that is an extremely complex thing.
Grief isn't the same for everyone. Comfort from others isn't always the answer to grief. Grief can be shown in many forms.
It reminds me of how Helaena got a lot of hate after the b&c scene, and people saying she had no empathy/care for her children due to her reaction. Not everyone reacts the same to these things. If you would kick and scream that's valid, but people, like Helaena who would dissociate from shock and trauma are valid as well.
We're all completely different individuals, billions of us. We all experience things and show things different. Just because we may experience things differently, doesn't mean we are lacking of empathy.
In my opinion, the only people who fail to have empathy are the ones who cannot comprehend this.
#hotd#alicent hightower#house of the dragon#helaena targaryen#aegon targaryen#aegon the second#hotd s2#hotd alicent#hotd fandom critical#there's no black and white when it comes to grief and these things#people think providing someone comfort will always make them feel better#yes empathy is a basic trait#but again#Alicent is not close with her children she doesn't know if it would help she wants to but again she doesnt know how or if it would help#I don't think its her lacking empathy when you can clearly see the pain on her face#I have a strained relationship with one of my parents if I was in great grief and they tried to help it would become awkward and worse#I think alicent understands that#I mean shit even with my closest parent sometimes i just need to be left alone#so don't expect comforting by hugging/presence will always be the answer to things#empathy#true empathy is recognising these things aren't as easy as you think#and not shaming people and saying they lack empathy just because they reacted in a way you didn't comprehend
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Here's part two of drawing my family pictures as the Bad Batch because I can and you can't stop me
#i can tell you right now that drawing their armor was a fucking pain in the ass#and the l e g s jesus fucking christ#why do i have to care about anatomy#don't ask where crosshair and wrecker's legs are btw i wouldn't know#fun fact the original picture is from our summer vacation to Italy back in 2018#tech is me in this picture actually real and true#another fun fact#omega's eyebrows were blonde until the very last minute because i felt like they looked kinda odd#and she does actually have dark eyebrows in the show so--#i don't know if they look any better now but ehh good enough#hunter looks so wrong for some reason but i can't fix him i'm sorry#also yes they're all in their blacks because a) i couldn't be bothered to draw all the armor again and b) they deserve the comfort#i might do proper shadings if i find the motivation for this but until then this is what you're getting#the bad batch#bad batch#tbb#the bad batch fanart#bad batch fanart#tbb fanart#hunter#omega#crosshair#wrecker#echo#tech#the clone wars#star wars#star wars fanart#art#my art
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if you have chronic pain i love you btw. and if you have meds and need them right now, TAKE THEM!!! there's no shame in helping yourself and there's no honor in forcing yourself to be in pain
#im talking to one of my friends#whose wife has hypermobility#and the amount of things we have in common around that is crazy#we're swapping ideas of things that help and it just feels so fulfilling#like yes i have this pain but i have a couple things that help!#they might help you!#she's also been wanting to get a rollator which is what i would get if i got a mobility aid#not mlm#dantes talking again#chronic illness#chronic pain#EDS#ehlers danlos syndrome
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Dragging my teeth across concrete, I'm still so mad about everything, oh bbygirl
#ye he is doing ouchie but that's not why he's crying#ouyang my beloved#im so fucking mad all that and for whatttttttt#only cure for this pain is a modern au where they meet again#may they have all their lives together#also yeah idk how to do smoke#general ouyang#the radiant emperor#the radiant emperor fanart#general ouyang fanart#fanart#art#digital art#illustration#tw self destruction#tw self destructive behavior#tw self h4rm#he who drowned the world#she who became the sun
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i do love canon amy & rory but god, does some part of me wish they really had gone with the idea of the doctor picking up a child as a companion (and then later, that child’s best friend with a huge crush on her.) with the rest of the season really not changing at all, except now it’s amelia pond with an angel in her head killing her and lost alone in the woods. it’s little rory who dies and is forgotten and becomes a toy soldier. if this is going to be a fairy tale, then let it be one. children have never been safe in fairy tales.
#it wouldn’t have to change any of the actual plot of the season. except MAYBE amy’s choice but even then i think amy’s choice would be the#one episode where they should be adults. if only for the half where they live in a village in that dream.#because that’s the kind of future that children would dream up. they live in a little cottage and nothing ever goes wrong and their best#friend visits them all the time even though they’ve grown up.#they aren’t actually adults there just children with an idea of what they should be as adults and acting accordingly#and it would still end the same way.#but idk its just. rory’s 2000 years waiting for amy inside the pandorica is already tragic. yes.#now imagine its a kid. a kid in a little roman soldier helmet who will never grow up. who will not leave his best friend.#he loves her and she’s more important than the whole universe and that sort of love is supposed to MEAN something in a fairy tale!#its supposed to melt the ice out of hearts and transform people from stone.#and what that love means here. is that he will have to wait 2000 years. a child and a box.#little rory and the amelia who followed the doctor’s letters to the pandorica. and she doesn’t recognize him again.#and amelia in the pandorica… 2000 years a child trapped in a small box waiting to be rescued.#s5 is already fucked for them but it could be worse. it could be so much worse.#and it would make the doctor choosing to take her place in the pandorica to save the universe later even better.#because who else but the doctor would put the fate of the universe on the shoulders of two children and realize much too late what a#monstrous thing he’d done. and still have to hope. have to hope. that amelia would remember him fondly enough to bring him back to reality.#the logistics of all of this would have been a pain lmao. child labor laws in acting and all that.#BUT. hypothetically. it would have slapped.#doctor who#amy pond#rory williams#<- also this entire time ive been referring to him in my head as rory pond so much that i fuckin. forgot his actual last name.#and then like if you want them to be adults in s6 or whatever you can just timeskip to them getting married and still have amelia remember#the doctor there. it would work. it would.#amelia pond au
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okay but imagine loving someone so much you're willing to live the same crushing reality over and over again with no one to share the immense guilt you feel over lying and having to watch people die you could technically save solely because you cannot live in a world where that other person isn't by your side
#yes i'm crying again#i wonder if qiao ling now has xixi's powers and if she will ever read lu guang's memories#still not over the password on lg's phone....#he doesn't let it faulters he doesn't let himself forget what he's enduring all this shit for even if it's painful and [screaming]#doomed by the narrative gays always hit.... i'm so sad#link click
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stand by for life💃💃stand by for life🕺🕺
#yoko posting again!!#i consume this album like a hungry animal#best yoko songs are there#like?? coffin car??angry young woman??she hit back???woman power??a thousand times yes??#and growing pain omfg#my girl was cooking there#i hear im a battleship#and im dead#yoko ono crucified and resurrected me#mikis art#the beatles#yoko ono#yoko ono fanart#the beatles fanart#Spotify
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thinking about. narukami arashi. in all her messy self. augh...
#i love her sm and its like way beyond the queen girlboss thing#i have yet to read much of her in the !! stories cuz im catching up slowly but#at least in what ive read so far. shes such a wonderful character. full of duality#shes caring shes distant shes cute and dainty she could beat your ass shes confident shes insecure shes collected shes impulsive#she wants to be loved and love as well but she knows it's painful to chase after someone... to lose people... its painful and scary...#i love how she insists on being there for mika bc she already lost someone to her self centeredness. she will reach out.#she will not allow herself to miss her friends' pain again#but also she keeps her distance... leo had to literally shake her pain out of her...#in ! even though eeeveryone is mean and transphobic she keeps smiling and doesnt push the issue#even tho it hurts her sm to be constantly invalidated...#(yes ik its a good bit of retcon shut up)#even though shes so confident in herself. she still cowers at the thought of being rejected and ostricized.#tbh i love knights in general. the overarching theme of “individualists”#but theyre all just. deeply lonely and unloved people#theyre sticking close and playing family but theyre all terrified deep down its all a house of cards...#i need to read the model trio lookback. i need little nacchan and the birth of her insane crush on the teacher guy.#(also tbh i stand by nacchan being thw most normal knights member. even her crush is Just Girlhood Things)#(like cmon who didnt know a girl who had a delusional crush on someone older. i knew like 10 girls like that#its only the child model part that makes her unusual. between a rich nobleson a yandere tsundere model#a genious lunatic composer a vampire chuunibyou guy and a child model tgirl. whos the most normal)#enstars#arashi narukami
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He has his mother's eyes. ❤️🐓🐍❤️
Young Renard and his mom Zina.
#zina's chainmail is always a pain but always an interesting texture gotta say#tw blood#eye horror#blood#my art#my ocs#yes Renoir goes by any name in the same name family. Renard was the birth name.#if you can guess what i'm going for with the emoji clues and eye color pallet clues u get a cookie#i'm always a little hesitant to full on call their eyes the evil eye (tho that is what it is to me and in story)--#because i'm always a little unsure what the culture is around it and how strict it is like.. as a symbol to be used in fiction#i go by 'if you think about hurting people while looking at them it harms them' rules Zina can never live around humans ever again#i find it funny that hadrain is a poor little pathetic meow meow depression vampire dad while zina is like.. badass and blood soaked human#like who am i kidding i would always draw zina with eye horror she is the eye horror queen#ren also got his hair from his mom (though ren's hair texture has slightly more curl to it)#ask me to tag somethin if u think it needs it
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⟢ highlight of the hour: my dearest [15/20] ⟣
sweet dreams
#my dearest#korean drama#nam goongmin#ahn eun jin#mmkfav#mygif#mdhoth#the first half of this ep was so unserious askdjfd#jh pretending to be unconscious just so he could spend more time with gc hahaha#i laughed so much in this ep which was finally a nice change of pace#becus all we had gotten so far was pain and tears and sadness#also i really really really liked this scene#the way gc held jh's hand which she's always wanted to do#and how jh woke up to find her next to him#pls dont ever separate them again :((#(yes im talking to you ryang eum)#(dont you dare!!)#(leave my parents alone!!)
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pretty sure i have a kidney infection but i think everything is gonna be okay
#i called the doctors office neither of my beautiful lady doctors who believe me every time i say i have a problem were there and a guy#doctor was the only person to talk to#and he said PUSSY ASS BITCH TAKE AN IBUPROFEN AND SHUT THE FUCK UP#just kidding he gave me some other symptoms to watch out for and said to go to the er if i get those. but that for now i should just keep an#eye on it. anyway i cried a little bit i called my mom and she said that i should be peeing after sex and i said yes mom i'm a grown ass#woman. i called my bf he had a theory that i am making myself anxious about it and making the pain worse. which may have been true but also#i think he's biased bc he gives himself psychosomatic symptoms of everything all the time.#but i'm taking a bath and watching dumb youtube and i actually feel way better so maybe it's true.#anyway i'm already on antibiotics. i'm going to survive the night. if it's not feeling better tomorrow i can call my doctor again!!! bitch!#like calm down jesus....
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looking through diagnosis stuff for conditions usually diagnosed in childhood is so funny brother i dont know how to tell you this is for me not my child.my mom didnt love me enough to take me to a professional as a child.did none of you ever guess that might happen (dont answer that god knows how much society romanticizes parents as incapable of doing wrong)
#my moms still convinced im gonna get diagnosed w ✨light autism✨#girl how the FUCK I DIDNT EVEN LEARN HOW TO WALK RIGHT ???#this one time i was in the doctor for severe hip pain n she commented if it could have been caused bc of that#n i was like 'IVE BEEN WALKING WRONG N YOU DIDNT TELL ME???' but then when i asked again later she went#'i never said that' YES YOU DIDDD???#analiceoriginal.txt#shaking n sobbing who decided parents will have most of the says in diagnoses.sister you got told i needed to see a professional#for autism in kindergarten do NOT start on this 'oh yk its light so she never got it properly checked' no youre just rly bad at this#mom thing
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