#yes I know this is late but in my defense. I forgot
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dustmint · 2 months ago
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Lodgetember Day 3: Headcanons!!!
Here are some flowers headcanons because she's my favourite
She's one one of the newer lodgers and joined maybe one month or so before Jasper did
She's not a talkative person, but she is one of the more gossip-y lodgers, she's used her spy bugs to see what's going on at the society sometimes and to get a bunch of gossip
Jekyll caught her doing that and told her not to, still does it sometimes
She keeps live bugs in her lab to study, they're kinda like her pets and she has names for all of them
She likes to draw, has a preference for drawing her bugs or real people that she knows or remembers meeting, she's drawn some of the lodgers and is on a quest to draw them all (if she gets the courage to ask)
She keeps a diary that's not really up to date, but she has written down random information like reminders, the name of the other lodgers and what they do, as well as which lodgers are scared of bugs and those that aren't
Very good listener, will remember weirdly specific details but will walk into a room and forget why she was there
Used to have a big fear of bugs until she became obsessed with them one day, still kinda has a fear of some of them
Likes to fiddle with her spy bugs sometimes and say stuff to them
First met Jekyll after some of her spy bugs went haywire and started flying around everywhere, copying a bunch of noise and terrorizing some of the people around the area where she lived, that Jekyll happened to be passing by. He was able to use the bugs to track her down, and he offered to help with the ones that were malfunctioning. The bugs caused a small-ish scandal but no one knows it was her except for the rest of the lodgers, Rachel and Jekyll (But the police never found her and probably never will)
Keeps both real and robot bugs locked away very securely inside her lab
Had a habit of picking at her nails, main reason for wearing gloves
Has insomnia and sleep apnea, so she has a lot of trouble sleeping. Most nights she won't even bother trying to sleep and will just fiddle with some of her mechanic bugs instead, but she'll usually end up falling asleep in the middle of working
Very good friends with Bird, I like to think they've went to the countryside or somewhere like that to go catch bugs to look at and also to look for rare plants
Also good friends with Lavender, no reason why, I just think they would be good friends
Consulted Maijabi and Tanis about if bugs has souls and if a bug died if they could bring it back, Maijabi did not answer the question. But she and Tanis keep randomly having very serious discussions about it and also about if it would be possible to put the soul of a bug into one of her spy bugs. This ended up with them becoming friends
Hangs out a lot with Pennebrygg to talk about automatons
Has considered making automaton bugs to murder someone, hasn't gotten around to actually doing it
She's aromantic
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avieaerie · 1 year ago
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Have some sword dancing 🗡️
Description under the cut:
[ID: Mollymauk Teafleaf from Critical Role. Mollymauk is a purple skinned tiefling, wearing a heavily embroidered red and teal coat around his waist as a skirt, patterned leggings and a long teal scarf around his chest, trailing it's ends over his arms. He is facing away from the viewer, standing in a spotlight up on his toes on one foot, throwing a sword in the air while holding another behind him. End ID]
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javelinbk · 9 months ago
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Valentine’s Day cards: Two of Us (2000) edition
insp
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madd-nix · 8 months ago
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I finally finished this after making this poll forever ago! Here are Apollo and Rei as the latest two characters for my Ace Attorney x PLA swap. You can check out the other ones for Phoenix/Ingo, Trucy/Akari, Maya/Emmet, and Edgeworth/Melli at each of those links, and I think I'll start tagging them all now as "#ace attorney x pla" for easier access.
Also, plugging my commissions! If you like this, please consider commissioning me! Thank you! 💜
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almadelsur · 25 days ago
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💋 The Secrets One Keeps
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summary: You're in love with jj but he's with kie, so in moments of pure desperation you often find yourself turning to the person he hates the most...rafe
warnings: some good old angsty pining, very very slight smut if you squint, fem!reader, one or two uses of y/n, plz let me know if I missed anything
a/n: SHE'S BACKKKK, so I've decided to completely reformat and re-post this fic with a few tweaks and editing considering i first wrote this like 3 years ago, and yes for those of you who have been asking, I fully intend to finallly continue this fic....more info on that later ;)
.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。..・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・
JJ’s eyes change the moment Kiara steps into any room. Immediately his presence is ripped away from your immediate atmosphere, popping the little bubble you'd spent all afternoon crafting as he sprung up to greet the olive-skinned enigma that captured his affections.
“Kie!” The joy in his tone was incomparable to anything he’d directed at anybody else. Nothing could draw out such happiness from the blonde. You hated that about her.
In an attempt at self-defense, your brain shut itself off. Shielding you from processing the scene in front of you, your emotions ran cold like cement pouring down and across your neurons. It was the only way you could survive such a beating to your heart.
You figured that by distancing yourself mentally, you wouldn’t have to raise suspicion and distance yourself physically. In reality, you knew the real reasoning was your inability to stay away from JJ but the facade helped you cope.
“Hey J” she embraced him and his body relaxed around her as if she was the only source of his happiness. The only way he’d find alleviation from what he perceived as a shitty life being through her. “Sorry I’m late my parents had me running like crazy at the wreck today.”
Scattered greetings filled the air from the rest of the pogues, yet you could only focus on the way his eyes fixated on her like she was the most beautiful thing he’d ever seen.
“Here come sit baby” he offered her the seat he had just previously been place holding. What you thought had been quality time with your best friend, presented itself to you now as momentary attention to pass the time until his actual desire arrived.
Settling herself down and offering you a wide smile, her shoulder bumped against yours gently as a sign of acknowledgment.
“Hey dude” she directed at you, but you didn’t reply. You just couldn’t bring yourself to pretend. Not today anyway. Instead, you offered her a small smile, it was minimal but it was the best you could do under the circumstances.
“Yo" A crumpled tissue paper flew at your head, jj attempting to refocus your attention on him, "didn’t you say you were gonna get some water or something?” He spoke up, the scheme evident in his tone.
“um yeah I guess” You lifted yourself up and took a few steps before jj used the opportunity to slump himself down where you had been sat and sprawled his arms across his girlfriend’s shoulders.
“snooze ya loose sucker” he joked as he turned to Kiara to start up some mindless conversation. Leaving you behind in the dust.
Your teeth gritted as you focused on making your way to the kitchen hoping the distance from the scene unfolding would lift the iron grip on your heart.
You made the fatal mistake of glancing back and you were met with the image of jj nuzzling up to kiara in a picturesque display of love. The lump building at the base of your throat indicated that it was your time to get the hell out of there before you broke down in front of everyone. 
“Shit guys, y’know what I just realized I gotta go” You spoke quickly, your tone matching your pace as you rushed to the exit of the chateau. 
“You’re still coming to the party later though right?” John B asked, not tearing his eyes away from the screen in front of him. 
“Mhm yeah sure” you opened the door ready to depart. 
“Shit I forgot about that! Me and jj are gonna be late, we got dinner at the wreck tonight.” kiara added as you stepped out, unable to control the escape of a rogue tear.
“Date night babyyyy” You heard JJ cheer before you slammed the door behind you. 
“Is Y/N okay? She seemed a bit off.” Kie nudged JJ as she questioned. 
JJ furrowed his eyebrows momentarily. Glancing out the window, he saw you jog away from the house, and a brief flash of worry flashed through his mind. As quick as it came, it dissipated. He shook his head figuring that if there had been something wrong, he’d have been the first to know. 
“Nah she’s okay don't worry.” he offered to kie.
Boy was he mistaken. 
——————————————————————
“Fuuuck me” you moaned out, sinking into him one last time. You were hot, sweaty, and heaving as you pulled him out of you.
“I thought I just did” Rafe taunted leaning back to lie down, arms crossed behind his head causing his taut abdomen to flex.
You scrambled off the bed, picking up your garments and shoving them back on your body forcefully.
“What, no pillow talk?” He tried again.
“Rafe..” you trailed off. Whenever you’d finish fucking, you’d struggle to even look at him. The self-hatred flooded your body as soon as the orgasm poured out.
“Hey you called me” he eyed you intently but you knew he didn’t actually care. To rafe cameron everything was just a game. At this point it was pretty much common knowledge. “In fact” he moved closer to you so that he could speak directly into your ear “It’s always you that calls me.”
“Don’t be a dick” you stood up and eyed your heels contemplating whether you could face the walk back in them. “You know it makes me feel like shit.” It might have sounded brutal but that’s how things were with rafe.
“Yeah, it’s like you punctuate your orgasms with self-hate.”
“I'm a pogue, rafe.” You argued back as if it was the most obvious thing in the world.
“So? Kooks and pogues can fuck you know.” You couldn’t comprehend why you were even having this conversation. Why now, why tonight.
“Yeah maybe, not you though.” You didn’t want to tell him the reason explicitly.
“I fuck pogues.”
“You fuck anyone.” The words came out almost instantly and without thinking, yet rafe took no offense.
“Exactly so what’s the issue?”
“The issue is, rafe.” You paused trying to find the words without actually having to say the words. “The issue is that if my friends found out they’d hate me, probably more than I already hate myself.”
He just chuckled, the look in his eyes changing as he figured you out.
“What's funny?” You challenged.
“You don’t have to bullshit me princess.” He looked up at you with a devilish glint in his eye. “You just don’t want jj knowing about your little escapades huh?” Bingo.
“He’s with Kiara.” You shrugged him off.
“Uh huh, you like him but you can’t have him.” Every word he spoke striking a nerve deep within you. “So you’re fucking me to fuck him over.”
“You don’t know what you’re talking about.” You grabbed your heels and shoved them on, wincing as you buckled them up.
“Don’t I?” He threw his joggers on lazily as he stood, the level dynamics changing significantly. The older boy towered over you. “Where are they tonight?”
“Back at John B’s, we had a little get-together.” You crossed your arms. More often than not you usually called rafe after a few drinks left you feeling lonely. “Sorry, your invite must have gotten lost in the mail.” You attempted to jab at him with sarcasm yet he clearly held the upper hand with his line of questioning. 
“So all of them are there now?” He stepped towards you.
“Mhm,” You lied.
“Even jj?” Moving closer until your neck was craned upwards to meet his eyes.
Taking your silence as an answer, he reached up and ran his palms across your upper arms, prompting you to uncross them.
“He was uh- him and kie should be getting there soon” You mumbled.
“So would i be wrong in guessing, that might have prompted your call then?” You let yourself be guided by his movements leaning your neck further back as his hand trailed up to your jawbone.
“rafe…” you called out insignificantly.
He leaned in and pressed his lips against your neck, right over where he could feel your pulse, and pressed down.
You couldn’t help the gasp that left your mouth. Because as much as your heart belonged to jj, rafe was just so fucking good at raising your temperature.
“Round two?” He mumbled against your neck.
“Yeah..” you attempted yet it came out as a whisper. He grabbed you swiftly and lifted you, moving you across the room and throwing you down onto his bed, crawling on top of you in a predatory manner as he did so. As your back hit the bed, the ringing of your phone brought you back from the haze he had you under. 
“Wait rafe stop stop” you pushed him off and grabbed the screeching mobile, pressing it up to your ear. “Hello?”
“Dude, where are you?” The sound of jj’s voice came through over the pumping sound of music and party chatter. “Me and Kie just got back and John B says no one’s seen you for like over an hour.”
“Oh I’m uh, I had to go do something for my mom” The lie pouring out of your mouth caused rafe to chuckle which was of course met by a slap from you signaling for him to be quiet.
“Oh well, when are you getting back? I have to tell you about this date. You’re gonna be so proud of me I actually think I’m ready to tell Kie I love her” you screwed your eyes shut as he spoke.
“Yeah I- you know what I can’t make it back my mom needs me to stay and help out but uh I’ll see you tomorrow or something.” You hung up before he could even reply, throwing your phone down uncaring of its state.
“What’s wrong? They getting hitched?” Rafe spoke up from behind you.
You turned to Rafe, the fire in your veins pushing your arms to grab him, roughly pulling him back onto you.
“Just shut up and fuck me rafe.”
And fuck you he did.
——————————————————————
The next morning you woke up to the sight of rafe’s bare back. Not much of a cuddler, you figured.
Quietly you pushed the covers off and began to dress yourself back up. As you got to your shoes you sighed and shook your head, as if there was any way in hell you were going to walk home in heels. You scooped up your shoes and your now-cracked phone shaking your head, slightly ashamed at your outburst.
Without even a second glance at the sleeping body you were leaving behind, you made your way over to the door. As you turned the knob and stepped out to leave, a husky voice spoke up.
“I’ll keep my ringer on for you babe.”
You rolled your eyes looking back at him, “Fuck you rafe.”
“Yeah, that’s what I’m counting on.” He didn’t even open his eyes as he answered, instead just rustling around in the bed and turning to the other side, once again facing his back to you.
You scoffed as you exited. Your internal rant clouded your vision, body on autopilot with an excellent self-navigation of the Cameron house from the countless times you’d made this exit.
“Y/N?” The gentle voice wiped your thoughts clean as the shock stilled you dead in your tracks, slowly turning to come face to face with none other than Sarah.
“Sarah” you drawled out. “What are you doing here?”
“It’s my house?” Her head was cocked to the side, equally shocked to see you.
“No I just mean- I thought you were spending the night at John B’s.” You forced the small talk, avoiding the topic of why you were here, sneaking out at 8 in the morning.
“He had to work today, did you spend the night here?” She glanced up at the door of rafe’s bedroom.
“Umm-“ There had only been two other instances where you had been at a complete loss for words. The day jj told you he and Kiara were dating, the morning after your first sexual encounter with rafe, and now this.
“Are you sleeping with my brother?!” She whisper-shouted, eyes wide as the realization hit her. Busted.
“No?”
“Oh my god!” She grabbed you by the wrist and dragged you to her room, slamming the door as soon as you were both inside. “How long has this been going on?!” Her tone was loud and her hands wild as she interrogated you.
“Just a little under a year.” You sat on her bed and looked at your lap as you spoke. Reminiscent of a child being scolded.
“A year?! Oh my god!” She repeated. “Who knows about this?!”
With that, you looked up at her desperately. “No one. No one knows so please don’t tell them.” You didn’t have to name names for her to know who you were referring to.
“Are you two like” she paused “together?” She scrunched her nose up, disgusted at the thought of her bully of an older brother dating anyone.
“No god no. It’s just sex” you were just as uncomfortable as Sarah was, having to tell her about boning her older brother.
“Disgusting.” She turned away from you with her arms crossed, looking out the window.
“Look I’m not proud of it okay? Just-“ You sighed “Just please don’t tell anyone” pleading again.
Sarah let out a long sigh and uncrossed her arms. She walked over to you and joined you on the bed, her eyes showing concern mixed with something you couldn’t quite place your finger on.
“I thought you were into jj” she spoke softly, there it was. Pity.
“Yeah well, jj is with kie and instead of sitting around wallowing in self-pity, I decided to do something about it.” As the words left your mouth, you realized how weak the explanation was.
“So you just use rafe to bang the jj out of you.”
“It’s not like Rafe cares, if anything he’s also using me.” You tried to reason.
“I don’t doubt that. But I mean, that’s- It’s not healthy, you’ll never move on if you don’t actually process your emotio-“
“Look Sarah, I don’t need to do any of that shit okay? What I have here works, when I fu- when I’m with rafe, I don’t think about jj.” Tears began to swell in your eyes “Sleeping with rafe helps me forget about everything, even if it’s only for a little while he uh- he makes me feel good.” To an extent, there was truth behind your words, while you and rafe fucked the rest of the world went away. It was only after, that the crippling self-hatred hit you along with the return of your immense feelings for jj. 
Sarah shuffled over and threw her arm around you. “That’s not good for you, it’s just momentary. It’s easy and it's a cycle, you’re never going to get better going down this path. Especially not with rafe.”
“Rafe he’s- he’s not that bad.”
“Yes he is. But i bet it gives you satisfaction fucking him knowing jj hates him. Feels like revenge right?” She’d always been so perceptive your Sarah, you hated how she could see right through you.
Tears ran down your cheek silently. “You’re not gonna tell anyone right?” You sniffled.
She gave you one of those classic salt-of-the-earth Sarah Cameron smiles, the kinda smile that would light up any room she walked into. “Takin' it to the grave babe.”
A loud beeping caused both your heads to whip towards the window. “Shit, I completely forgot I was supposed to go on the HMS with pope and jj, we were gonna chill there until John B and Kie finished work.” She rose to her feet and extended an arm towards you. “Wanna come? Or we could drop you home if you’re not up for it.”
With a sigh you took her hand and pulled yourself up, walking beside her as you mentally prepped yourself to face the blonde you desperately pined for.
“Well rise and shine campers.” jj yelled out of the window of the drivers seat.
“Y/N! Where you been dude? you totally bailed last night.” Pope was next to speak as you and Sarah filed into the Twinkie. As JJ began to drive you avoided any form of eye contact in his general direction.
“I had to go help my mom out, blackout at mine again.” You didn’t even look at pope either, instead focusing your attention on the blur of trees and houses pacing by the window as JJ sped down the winding roads.
“Isn’t that what you were wearing last night?” pope, observant as always, pointed out.
“Uh yeah, I didn’t really get any time to change cause…”
“I called her last night when I got home, I was so drunk I don’t think I was ready to stop the party.” Sarah covered for you.
“Yeah I wrapped up helping my mom out and then this one calls me talkin bout a sleepover or something so I didn’t exactly have much time to change.” 
Thankfully pope had lost interest as soon as he had asked the question, otherwise, your overcompensating ass would have been caught out straight away. You always had to add to the lie until you felt like you had sold it completely.
Keeping your eyes trained on the outside meant that jj’s frown directed at you through the windscreen mirror went completely undetected. He always knew whenever there was something up with you and right there and then he knew something definitely was.
“Hey, you okay?” He didn’t need to address you explicitly for you to know he was talking to you.
“Yeah just tired.” You shrugged him off in an attempt to distance yourself from him yet again.
He knew you were lying but he didn’t understand why, you never lied to each other. Apart from John B, the pair of you were closer to each other than with anybody else in the group. You’d been best friends since kindergarten, and since then you’d sworn 3 things to each other.
1- You’d always share your snacks.
2-You’d always be best friends even if you argued.
 3- You would never ever lie or keep secrets from each other.
Of course, as the both of you grew older the rules became more and more lax. The snack sharing was limited only to when you felt nice enough and sometimes you’d go for days without making up if you had argued particularly badly. Having kept two friendship-breaking secrets from him, the childhood rules seemed pretty insignificant by now.
“Mhm,” he responded, flickering his eyes between you and the road. “Are we taking you home to change first?”
“Yeah, I don’t know if I’ll join you guys afterward though.” You chewed down on your nail anxiously as the tension from being in the same space as jj paired with the guilt from having fucked rafe prior, suffocated you.
JJ made a face as he focused on the road, something was wrong with you and he’d be dammed if he wasn’t going to put his everything into finding out what that was.
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waitingonher · 11 months ago
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because i love you — [hoo boys headcanons]
summary: your "thing" with the hoo boys!
author's note: in honor of the pjo series coming out today,,have this rlly rlly short draft from earlier this year! xoxo
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percy jackson — doodling on him
“give me your hand.”
“yes ma’am.”
minutes pass as you doodle gods know what onto percy’s hand. you always resort to this whenever the camp head counselor's meeting begins late—which seems to be every meeting—and giving percy "tattoos" certainly kills time. last meeting, you drew a can of beans and the time before that, was a bouquet of tulips. so honestly his guess being a pair of socks this time isn’t too far of a reach.
“okay, done,” you release his hand, a proud smile gracing your features, “cute right?”
he quirks a brow upon seeing the drawing, “is that…” percy turns his head to the side, gaining better perspective, “is that a flying fish?” 
“wow, you’re good,” you say, giving him a nod of approval, “although, last time you did say that my can of beans looked like a roll of toilet paper…” 
your boyfriend throws his hands in the air, “in my defense, you used a shitty pen so it was hard to tell.” 
“whatever.” 
jason grace — sewing your initials on his clothes
“hi love,” jason says, plopping down beside you on the couch. you give him a bright smile as he places a gentle kiss on your head, “almost done?” 
nodding proudly, you hold up his pair of jeans to show him your work: your initials sewn onto a corner of his back pocket, “yup, just finished actually! what do you think of the color? i think you bought the thread for me on our second date. but i totally forgot i had it until i went digging in my supply box.” 
a grin plasters itself on jason’s face as he nods his head in realization, “i knew the color seemed familiar. i remember wondering why a tiny spool of thread was so expensive. but it’s perfect, i love it,” he kisses your cheek, “all my friends are gonna be so jealous that they don’t have their girlfriends’ initials sewn onto their clothes.” 
you laugh as you imagine jason vehemently bragging about his jeans to all his friends, “tell them i’m charging $50 if they want me to do theirs,” you wink. 
“we’d make more than the stolls’ and their smuggling business if we did that,” he laughs, admiring your work once more. who knew that having your initials on his pants would have such an affect on him, “also, can you do my sweaters and my other jeans?"
you raise a brow, "i might have to start charging you at this point."
leo valdez — impromptu fashion shows
“wow!” you clap enthusiastically, “your outfit even puts paris fashion week outfits to shame!” yes, because a rainbow checkered crop top with a humongous green tutu and a pink boa paired with insanely skinny stilettos beats any and all high fashion runway outfits, “now, leo valdez, can you give us a few words about your new clothing line? and possibly a bit about what it’s like to be so amazingly talented?” you inquire, raising an invisible microphone to his mouth. 
leo oh-so humbly bows and rises with a proud grin, “thank you, thank you, but i honestly must give all credit towards my beautiful muse, y/n, she’s the inspiration behind my new line. and about being so talented, it really is such hard work to be this naturally gifted.”
“ooh, do tell about this ‘y/n.’ i’ve never heard of her but she does sound absolutely gorgeous!” you exclaim, keeping up with the act. 
your boyfriend nods firmly, “oh yes, she’s very, very, very beautiful,” adding a playful wink, “but i must say, she has the worst morning breath i’ve ever encountered!” 
your smile drops and you squint your eyes, “i’m going to choke you with that stupid ugly boa if you don’t take that back right now.” 
“uh ma’am,” leo backs up nervously, clutching his boa, “i’m going to have to call security if you threaten me again.” 
"i'm seriously going to kill you."
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etfrin · 9 months ago
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— ᴅᴏ ʏᴏᴜ ɢᴏᴛ ᴘʟᴀɴꜱ ᴛᴏɴɪɢʜᴛ? | ꜱᴘᴇɴᴄᴇʀ ʀᴇɪᴅ
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✧— ᴡᴀʀɴɪɴɢ: NSFW | subby to soft dom! Spencer, fem! Reader, insecure Reader in the beginning, Spencer gets punched once, oral sex (male receiving), blood kink if you squint, praise kink if you squint, no use of y/n, uses of nicknames such as baby, sweetheart etc, fingering (female receiving), squirting, pussy slapping, overstimulation if you squint | lmk if I forgot something!
✧— ꜱᴜᴍᴍᴀʀʏ: A blind date with Dr. Spencer Reid ends in a surprising manner, including a spilt lip and a thief
✧— ᴡᴏʀᴅ ᴄᴏᴜɴᴛ: 3.6k
✧— ᴀ/ɴ: probably one of my most favourite work I ever wrote, please give it love <33
「ᴍᴀꜱᴛᴇʀʟɪꜱᴛ | ɴᴀᴠɪɢᴀᴛɪᴏɴ | ᴛᴀɢʟɪꜱᴛ」
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You were on a blind date with Dr. Spencer Reid.
Penelope had set you both up, and you had agreed to the date because there was no harm in it. The man himself was punctual meanwhile you were unfortunately ten minutes late. In your defense, you had to keep redoing your eyeliner.
You won't admit it to him when he asks why you were late. Instead, you said dismissively, “Oh, it's the traffic.” The stare he gave you assured you of the fact that he knew you were lying.
“The rush hour shouldn't begin in this area for another hour. Even then if you were truly stuck in traffic, you would have come even later,” he said as a matter of fact.
You raised your eyebrows in shock, your lips parting as you scoff. “Ah.. yes.. well..” You decided to let him know the truth, “It was actually because my eyeliner kept getting messed up and I had to redo it. I am sorry.”
“No need to apologize. The average woman spends about 22 and a half minutes getting ready when they go out,” he said, his fingers tapping on the table.
“Oh,” you said, taking in the fact, you suppress the urge to Google it to see if he's correct. “That's cool,” you smile softly at him.
The rest of the date goes averagely well. Spencer told you as much as he could about his work and you did the same. You learned about the man's IQ, and about the fact he was a genius. The longer the date goes on, you seem to realize you're not for someone who has achieved so many things at such a young age.
Your whole life was a mess. And Spencer noticed that you were hesitant to talk about yourself after finding out more about him. The date ended on a polite note. Despite the fact, you decided not to call him back, you liked him. He was sweet, a bit dorky but you liked hearing his random rants about things you never even thought about before.
The man insisted on walking you home and you agreed. It was a thirty-minute walk. As you both started walking, it was hard to keep pace with him. He had slowed down for you, and your hand kept brushing with his. But neither of you made the next move of simply holding hands.
You wanted to though.
Both of you continue walking in silence. You notice the full moon in the sky and grin. “The moon is so pretty,” you whispered.
“Yeah, very pretty,” Spencer mumbled back while looking at you.
You looked at him, and asked, “Wanna hold hands as well? It's kinda chilly.”
“I don't see how holding hands would help with the fact you're feeling cold. Would you like my jacket instead?”
You don't say anything, smiling at the agent so he would get the hint. He doesn't. You shake your head at yourself and state the obvious, “I would like to hold hands with you as we walk. Can I, Reid?”
He flushed, crimson covering his pale face. He stutters, “Ye- yes I would like that. And please call me Spencer.” He offers you his hand and you tangle your fingers with his. Within the next second the sweet moment is ruined.
A thief had come out of nowhere and had snatched your back. You stand there gaping at the figure that seems smaller by the second. Spencer didn't take a moment to react; he sprinted after the unsub. You get out of your stupor, your legs make you run towards the thief albeit slower than Spencer.
Spencer catches him. The agent gets punched but he quickly takes control of the situation. He twists the thief’s arm while you take your purse that was now on the street. You take out your phone and call the police. The police arrive soon.
Spencer handles everything and the thief is taken away. You notice that Spencer had a split lip and he was bleeding. “Hey,” you said, taking his attention away from the police. You raise your hand and you touch the cut. He winces.
“Sorry,” you mutter, “My house is right around the corner. I have first aid.” You add, knowing that he doesn't know how to take hints, “Come up?”
He furrowed his eyebrows. Fuck, he's adorable. Even with his perfect hair now a complete mess. He looked much, much better as a mess. You had to suppress the urge to lick the bead of blood on his lips.
“That would be nice,” he mumbles.
You bring the man to your apartment, Spencer has taken care of everything. You'll have to go to the police station tomorrow to give a statement. Right now, you focus on the pretty boy instead. You make him sit on the couch.
You bring out the first aid. You wet the cotton with the antiseptic, you sit in front of him. You already liked him. There's no denying that. But seeing him messy with blood turned you on to no fucking end. He was pretty before, now he's sexy to you. Your poor panties were suffering because of it. Completely utterly soaked with your arousal.
You act normal as you sit in front of him. You tilt his head and he lets you. Fuck. Even that made your cunt clench around nothing. You swallow as you press the bud onto his cut. He lets out a whimper. And... you felt yourself going insane, wanting to hear that sound on repeat.
You clean up the wound to the best of your abilities. You sit back satisfied. You grin at him, your hand musing his hair up because you just couldn't control yourself. “All done, pretty boy.”
You can't help but feel disappointed that it was over. He will leave. You'll drown in your own insecurities to ever ask for a second date. “You didn't like me much, did you?” Spencer asked. His hand is in his hair desperately trying to fix his ruined hairstyle.
You scoff playfully, “Why would you think that?”
“Most people I meet find me… overwhelming. Weird,” Spencer said, “I agreed to this date expecting nothing different. It was to satisfy Garcia. But… you were certainly nicer than the people I have met before. I would like to thank you for that.”
Your heart aches as you hear his words. You lean in, both of you sharing the same air now. Your hand is on his cheek, your thumb caressing his skin. “You're not weird, Spencer. You're unique. And you're out of my league. I am sorry if I made you feel bad-”
“No, you didn't,” he cuts you off, leaning in even closer. His eyebrows are furrowed as if he doesn't understand his actions. It was like you were gravity-pulling him in. Your lips brush with his, your breathing heavy. You can hear your heartbeat thumping against your ribcage.
“I never felt this way before,” he murmured, his hands getting tangled in your hair. His eyes were dark, and he closed them. He tried to pull back, trying to have a bit of self-control. He couldn't, he only leans in further, trying to close the gap between both of your lips.
“What way?” You whispered, wondering how you could make this man feel anything.
“I have an urge to kiss you. I have had that urge since you had bitten your lip nervously when I called you out in your childish lying. I have wanted to kiss you since you smiled at me genuinely as I was talking about things you as an average person couldn't possibly be interested in nor were you paying attention."
“Hey!” You chuckled, finding your way to his lap. “I was paying attention,” ‘To your lips’, you didn't add.
“Were you?” He challenged.
“Hmm,” you hum, your hands around his shoulders now. Your fingers twirling his hair near his nape.
“Liar,” he giggles. “I never thought I would find it endearing.”
Your heart warms as you hear his words. “Kiss me, Spencer,” you whispered, forgetting about his split lip. Spencer doesn't seem to care about the cut because he pressed his lips to yours as soon as he got your consent. You moan, your lips parting to welcome his tongue.
The kiss was clumsy. Wet, and sloppy and you loved it. The faint taste of blood coates your taste buds and you love it. Your tongue caresses his, trying to engrave his taste on your lips. You bite his lower lip, opening his cut. He hisses but doesn't break the kiss.
The kiss turns bloody but neither of you cares.
You rather enjoyed it more than you should. You lick the cut before kissing him again, he sucks your tongue tasting his blood on you. Both of you break the kiss before your lips meet his lips again in haste.
He groans into your mouth. You break the kiss and whisper, “Want you.” Your hands were on the hem of his sweater. “Can I?” You asked. He nods and you take it off. You then begin to unbutton the brown dress shirt he wore.
As soon as you get him undressed. Your hands begin to explore his body. He was lanky, and you loved it. He shivers when your finger tweaks his nipple. He sighs your name and you can feel his cock, hard and eager for attention beneath you.
“You like that, baby?” The nickname falls naturally from your lips. Your tongue ghosts over his neck, the hollow of his collarbone. He doesn't reply but you can feel his cock twitch. That's enough of an answer to you.
Your lips find his sensitive nipple. And you suck the hard pebble, enjoying his gasp. You smirk, as your tongue twirls against his sensitive flesh. Your hand gives his other nipple the same attention. You drag your tongue further down his stomach, your lips pressing wet kisses all over his heated skin. “Can I taste you, genius?” You whispered, your mouth took a bit of his skin to bite. You leave a mark of your teeth on his skin.
The mark looks good on him.
Spencer whines, “Yes, please.”
You unzip his pants, tug the cloth down, and free his legs of it. You were going to do the same for his boxers. But you decided to do something else. His boxer briefs were dark due to the pre-cum, one spot more prominent than others.
You place your lips there, and you suck his pre-cum that has seeped into the fabric. He groans at the sight, his eyes getting closed shut as his chest rises up and down. Spencer was breathing through his mouth. You find his cockhead, and suck harder, the material of the boxer getting darker and wetter because of your saliva.
Spencer moans your name, all loud and unabashed in the living room. With his moan comes a plea, “Don't tease, please.” You don't listen. Your tongue flicks over his clothed slit coaxing out more of his pre-cum. Only when you are satisfied with the mess you created, do you pull back. You snap the man back to reality by pulling the hem of his boxers and letting it snap on his skin. He whimpers, and you wonder briefly if he was as freaky as you. You wondered if he liked pain.
A discovery for another day.
You set him free from the confines of his boxers. His cock springs up, the cockhead hitting his stomach. The cockhead was a dark pink, bordering on a painful red. His cock was begging to cum with the way the veins were bulging, and his slit kept letting out beads of pre-cum. He was long enough to stretch out your cunt perfectly, he was thick enough to roll your eyes back.
He was… to describe this with a single word was impossible. All you knew was that you wanted his cum in your mouth, you wanted his cum painting your pussy walls. You wanted him. You wanted him ruined by you. You don't let a single thought of insecurity creep into your mind.
You distract yourself with his cock instead. You use your hand to squeeze more pre out of him. You enjoy the way the pearly white liquid drips onto your hand. You press a kiss to each of his balls. He gasps, both of his hands in a tight fist. His eyes were closed.
“Look at me, baby,” you whispered, “Look at me as I have my meal, baby.”
You lick all over his cockhead. You don't care if he opened his eyes or not. You were too busy moaning as you tasted him. Salty, and thick, you loved it.
Spencer Reid is now your favorite flavor.
You begin to take more of his cock in your mouth. Stopping halfway through his length because you didn't want to choke. You close your eyes and take a deep breath through your nose before you hollow your mouth. You begin to suck, not giving a fuck about your technique. You're hungry. You're eating him up.
This was as simple as that.
Your tongue runs all over his shaft, and the corners of your lips have saliva and pre-cum oozing out. Making you look like an absolutely pathetic mess. Spencer whimpers as he looks at you, his hand coming down to gently wipe away the mess. Even when his mind was numb with pleasure, he managed to be sweet. You reward his sweetness with a harsh suck causing his hips to thrust forward. The action made you take more of his cock, and you choke.
He tries to pull out but you stop his ministrations with a sharp slap on his thigh. You glare at him despite the fact your view is blurry with tears. Spencer tenses before relaxing. “Sorry,” he groans, “I didn't mean to do that. Feels so good, sweetheart.”
The nickname is a melody to your ears. You begin to bob your head upside down. You blink, letting the tears fall, you see the way his knuckles were turning white from the fists he made. You put your hands over his fists and pry them open. You intertwined his fingers with yours. His nails now dig into your skin, and yours does the same. You both have crescent-shaped marks on each other's hands.
Your nails dig into his skin a bit harder as you slowly take more of his cock down your throat. You take him down to the hilt, your nose pressed into his mound and you breathe in his primal scent. It drives you fucking insane. It reminds you of your sopping wet cunt that is aching to be filled.
Your eyes roll back as you continue. You move a bit and find yourself between one of his legs. You pressed yourself against the shin of his leg. You moan, the vibration of the sound sends jolts of pleasure to the boy. He cums, all thick and hot down your throat without a warning.
You let his cock slip out of your mouth, you couldn't manage to swallow all of his cum. It coats your lower chin, you rest your head on his thigh as you begin to ride his leg like a deprived whore. Your soaked panties weren't much of a textural pleasure against your pussy. But you would take anything you can get.
You wanted to cum. That's it.
Your actions are interrupted by a sharp yank of your hair. You moan from the pain and the pleasure that comes along with it. Your blurry eyes focus on Spencer, looking at you with wide brown eyes. “Come up, darling,” he said, gently, “Let me take care of you now.”
You whimper, hating the way you were interrupted but listen. You find yourself on his lap again, your back pressed to his chest. The brown-haired boy kisses your nape. “You were so good to me,” he praises, “Thank you.”
You wanted to reply, but instead, you let out a soft noise. Your head resting on his shoulder. He pressed a kiss to your temple. “Good girl,” and you nearly cum from the praise. His eyes are curious as he sees your reaction. The man is memorizing your reactions so he can play your body like a fiddle in the future.
You were giving him all the answers.
Good girl indeed.
He unbuttons the blouse you were wearing. It reveals your bra, and your nipples straining against the silk material. Spencer pulls the bra up, freeing your breasts. Spencer hums in satisfaction as he uses both of his hands to knead the soft flesh. You moan as he pinches your nipples, he plays with your breasts effectively.
You were so wet, you could feel your juices had coated your thighs. “Spencer,” you whine, “Do something please.”
He stills, “You want more?” He breathes down your neck, and you shiver as you feel the exhale of air on your skin.
“Yes,” you beg.
“What do you want?” He asked, his hand sprawled over your tummy. He pressed his hand softly, his fingers tapping on your skin in the similar way he tapped the wood at the beginning of the date.
“Anything,” you gasp, “anything you give me, Spence.”
He chuckled, and it was a bit mean to your ears. “And to think you didn't like me. How wrong you have proven me, darling. One of the few to ever do so,” he whispered, his tongue peeking out to lick the shell of your ear. You moan as you feel the wet muscle on your skin.
His hand travels further down your body. His finger snapped the button of your jeans open. He slides down your jeans alongside your panties down to your knees. Exposing your glistening pussy to the cold air. You let out a heavy sigh, your eyes closing as you melt into his touch.
He was looking at your pretty cunt, his fingers pushing your pussy lips aside to see your cute clit and your slit. “Beautiful,” he whispered. And he watched your cunt clench around nothing. He pressed his palm onto your slick sex, he began to slowly soak his palm onto your arousal. The pressure of his hand is delicious.
But you needed to be ravished.
He pulled his hand away before he brought it back to your pussy in the form of a slap. You jolt in his hold as he slaps your pussy, once, twice. The wet sound ringing in your ears as you nearly cum from this.
“You're really wet,” he notes, his fingers swiping up and down your folds. His digits were glistening with your arousal. You don't say anything, feeling your body burning with lust.
His thumb finds your clit, he plays with the bud. Flickering it with his fingers, even going as far as pinching it. He makes the poor bud all swollen and sensitive, you let him do all that, getting closer to your high from the simple yet mind-blowing touches.
“Spencer,” you moan, as you feel his fingers playing around your slit. Teasing you with the hint of going in but never venturing inside of your walls. “Come on,” you whine.
He tuts you, his fingers finding your clit to pinch the bud rather harshly making you see stars. “Don't be impatient,” he said.
His finger finds your entrance again, this time he pushes his middle finger in. The slide is extremely easy and wet. You moan as you let yourself be filled. The single finger pressed deep inside of you, and he twisted the finger making you see white.
“Warm,” he mumbles, “Tight too…” He pressed his ring finger in, and soon he was knuckles deep inside of your pussy. “You can take it,” he whispered, as his other arm was wrapped around your stomach keeping you caged.
“Yes,” you agreed with a loud whine, “I can!”
He begins to slowly fuck his fingers into you. The squelching sounds made because of how slick your pussy was spurring him on. “So wet for me,” he groaned near your ear, as his fingers found your spongy spot.
You gasp he expertly curls his fingers to the spot, his fingers rubbing the soft, yet hard sensitive muscle. You begin to squirm, feeling entirely overwhelmed. His arm tightened around you. His fingers begin to thrust inside you, faster and faster by each second.
You cry out his name. He doesn't stop. He won't stop. “Please, please, please!” You beg, but you don't tell him to stop so he continues. His lips were pressed to your neck, his tongue licking your pulse. “Good girl,” he groaned, as his fingers got soaked in your juices. Your slick walls clenched around his digits like a glove as you feel closer and closer to the edge.
He pushed a third finger in without warning. And it burns, but it burns so good that your eyes roll back. The coil that had gathered in your stomach snaps, and you feel yourself relax as your mind lets go. You don't even realize you're squirting, your cunt spasming around Spencer's fingers.
It feels so, so good.
You feel your eyes getting droopy, you feel yourself completely content and your mind breaking away from reality. You think you hear Spencer softly calling your name out. And you swear you whispered a coherent response.
You feel a pair of lips kissing your forehead.
“Don't worry, I'll take care of you.”
Suffice it to say, that wasn't the only date you and Spencer went on.
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fefern · 6 months ago
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Hello!! I'm in love with your Wuwa hcs and writing in general and I'd love to put in a request, if you're still open for them :0 <3
I'd like to request some fluffy hcs for Jiyan with an s/o that's part dragon, has horns and tail and maybe some scales like Mortefi(forgot if you spell his name like that I'm sorry😭 the red scientist guy). The s/o is super protective of him but also aloof in public, super cuddly in private when the time is right, brings him rocks and flowers as gifts and all that cute stuff, basically courting him by "dragon standards" hajsjdjd
Thank you for your time!<3
✧˖° his reaction to a dragon hybrid lover. | jiyan headcanons.
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⋆ ˚☁️ ⁀➴ synopsis: look in the sky! it's a bird, it's a plane, it's a... dragon hybrid reader? just how will jiyan react to being courted by you, and how does he love you as someone who's part dragon?
⋆ ˚☁️ ⁀➴ characters involved: jiyan and gender neutral reader.
⋆ ˚☁️ ⁀➴ warnings: none!
⋆ ˚☁️ ⁀➴ notes: hello hello hello! i hope you are doing well lovely anon!! thank you for sending in an ask, and i hope this fufils what you were looking for ;;!! sending lots of love, and as always, requests are open! ૮ ˶ᵔ ᵕ ᵔ˶ ა
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ᡣ𐭩 •。ꪆৎ ˚⋅ jiyan ᡣ𐭩 •。ꪆৎ ˚⋅
your tail would be so so pretty, decorated with scales that had colors that mimic the colors of the clouds and skies. 
your horns would be cute on the top of your head, a bit pointy and glowing in the night. 
jiyan has come to adore your dragon features, finding them both unique and absolutely beautiful. he’s caught often staring at the way your scales on your face, neck, and tail all catch the sunlight just right to create a glimmer like nothing he’s ever seen before. 
he’s quiet in the way he admires you, gently curling a piece of your hair behind your pointy little ears and smiling whenever you look over at him when he does. 
he didn’t have time to confess to you about his feelings though, he was caught up with being a general and of course, he also had to consider the fact that he didn’t really know if you would reciprocate them back. 
would you prefer mating with another dragon hybrid yourself? is that how these things work?
after a few months of being around you though, he began to notice some… strange things. 
for example, whenever you two were walking around the city, you’d always be on the defensive, not letting anyone get too close, not even the chef when you’d go get lunch together. 
then, sometimes, when he comes back from long patrols, you overload him with rocks and flowers that you’ve gathered for him, and he always says thank you, even though it’s a bit difficult to bring back to his home.
(he keeps them in his room forever to admire when you’re not around.)
also, lately, you’ve been much more affectionate with him, rubbing your cheek against his and getting very touchy as well, always wanting to be close to him physically. 
he expresses his confusion about your behavior to one of the researchers when he stops by one day to gather some intel for a mission for his rangers. 
one of the researchers directs him to a shelf that discusses about dragon hybrids, and the man spends almost the entirety of one day learning more about you and your species. 
the way he feels his cheeks flush a soft pink when he realizes just what it means for you to have been doing all these actions. he feels like he had a revelation, but at the same time feels stupid and dense. 
he’s quick to come back to you one day with flowers and your favorite food in hand, giving them to you and confessing his love for you on top of a quiet hill with a beautiful view of the starry night sky. 
“my pretty dragon, you’re prettier than anyone in all of huanglong, and i have loved you for quite some time. will you do me the honors and be mine?”
when you say yes, he feels overjoyed and wraps his arms around your waist, pulling you into a tight hug as he’s careful not to hit your horns or tail while doing so.
after the successful confession, a few things change. 
for one, when you begin sleeping over more at his place, he begins to gift you dozens of fluffy blankets and pillows. he organizes them in a nest-like position for you to cuddle up in, and finds it adorable when he comes back to the sight of you curled up in the fluffiness. 
jiyan will cuddle with you more often now, guiding your tail to wrap around his strong muscles so that you get your fix of touching as much of his skin as possible. jiyan likes to run his hands over the smooth scales to coax you to sleep.
he enjoys pecking soft kisses on the scales of your face and neck; it’s his little reminder to you to not be insecure about something so beautiful. 
overall, you’re jiyan’s most beloved treasure. he will do anything to make sure his little dragon is safe and loved.
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marvelobsessed134 · 4 months ago
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Kill kill
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This is part of my spooky summer series! You can find the masterlist in the pinned post on my profile!
Pairings: Serial Killer!Kate Bishop x Fem!Reader
Warnings: g!p Kate, fingering (f receiving), dom!kate, sub!reader, descriptions of violence, Kate is mentally unstable yall I cannot get enough of writing Kate as a complete psychopath <3
“The bow killer as they’ve been nicknamed due to bows and arrows being their preferred weapon, has begun terrorizing New York City. More after the break.” The news sounded from the TV. This damn killer has been everywhere recently. You sighed as you continued to cut strawberries up to eat as a little late night snack. Kate won’t be home till a little later she said she had something going on with work.
She has been gone late a lot more lately, which is suspicious but she provides for you and so, you choose not to question it. After cutting the strawberries you sat down at the couch and turned on HBO to watch one of your favorite horror flicks. Something to keep your mind off the very real murderer that’s on the loose.
In the middle of the movie the door to your shared apartment opened to reveal your sweaty and exhausted girlfriend. You furrowed your brows and paused the TV. “Where were you?” You asked. You didn’t want to sound insecure or anything like that but you couldn’t help it! She’s gone for three extra hours and comes home exhausted and sweaty like what!?
The raven haired girl paused for a moment, “At work. I thought I told you?”
“Yeah, I um forgot. Sorry.” She walked towards you and pressed her lips against hers. The kiss began to get more heated as she pushed you back onto the couch and got on top of you. You could feel her growing bulge against your leg making you whimper.
“You’re so pretty.” She whispered as she pulled her shirt off and undid her bra as well as doing the same to you. Kate toyed with your nipples and moved her hand down inside your sleep shorts and panties, playing with your wet core.
“Fuck Kate!” You moaned as you arched your back. “Cum for me baby, give me those sweet juices.” She growled.
As if on demand you felt yourself clenching around her fingers and you came inside your panties. “Naughty girl, cumming inside of her panties.” Your girlfriend chuckled before pulling her fingers out and sucking them dry. You then flipped her over, “Let me suck your cock?” You asked innocently.
“Fuck yes.” She muttered. You unbuttoned the fly of her jeans before pulling them down along with her boxers while you were mesmerized by her impressive length like always, you noticed a knife was tucked under the waistband of her boxers. It had a slip cover on it to cover the blade but there was…blood splattered on the handle?
“Katie…” you asked nervously.
“What is it honey? Can’t take it?” She teased but she knew that wasn’t the case because you’ve sucked her off many times before.
“What’s this?” You asked as you held up the knife. Her eyes widened, “I-it’s uh self defense.” Her response was way to quick as if she was covering something up.
“Kate Bishop please tell me the truth.” You said, a little more firmly but in a scared way.
Your girlfriend sat up and carefully took the knife from you. “If I tell you this, promise not to run. Because I will find you if you do.” Her words unsettled you but also oddly turned you on at the same time.
She put her hand over yours as she said this. All you could do was nod.
“I’m the bow killer.” Those four words sent you to the edge. Your heart was pounding, your pussy was still soaked and your mind was running ramped.
“T-the…y-you-“ was all you could muster out.
“Yes, baby. But please know I love you and I’m never gonna hurt you.” The raven haired girl cupped your face in her hands.
“Why?” Was all you could ask.
“Ever since I was a kid I had this…urge to hurt people. I know it’s wrong but I could never shake it and I- one night I let myself go and I killed a woman but it felt so good. The feeling was so addicting that I decided to just keep doing it. The more people I kill the less…I want to hurt you.” Her explanation was wild and you felt insane for understanding her.
“I don’t know why but I understand.” You replied. She sighed in relief and put the knife down on the coffee table, “Don’t tell anyone about this. You understand?”
“Yes Kate.”
“Good girl.” And she kissed you once again.
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hoshinasblade · 3 months ago
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im going to need you all to send me happy thoughts please because i am having a very bad week and it's only monday lol anyway here's some angst. i know i have written a lot of stuff here already but so far this one is my favorite (despite me literally drafting this in my phone so expect some grammar errors or spelling mistakes), so if you can, let me know what you folks think. likes, replies, and reblogs are appreciated but i will bonk you in the head if you repost or copy any of my writings. THANK YOU ANON FOR THIS ASK!
you could bring a numbered kaiju into submission but it seems that your heart is an entirely different monster.
you should have known better than to fall in love with a colleague, and you should have known better than to fall in love with the third division's vice-captain. your own commander, gen narumi, threw you a dirty look when he found out about your intimate relationship with the bowl cut bastard, and as much as you want to come up with a good enough excuse, the best thing you were able to give is a cliched the heart wants what the heart wants. narumi scoffed at you upon hearing it, following it up with a personal vow to never be romantically involved with anyone in the force.
it didn't have to be said but hoshina still did the honors - there's not a lot of ground rules in your relationship but the first one is this: you and he are soldiers first, lovers second. you pondered if it was supposed to hurt you, and you asked yourself what the hell is wrong with you to say yes to such a set-up: all those love advice by your family and friends about how you should not settle with the bare minimum flew out the window. "i have a responsibility to my division. but i also know i love you," was what hoshina told you. in hindsight maybe you did not care about anything else he said except the part where he confessed he loves you.
you convinced yourself that nothing is more important than being loved by hoshina soshiro. and you persuaded yourself that if he could place you second in his priorities, you would be able to do so too. "i mean, i was a defense officer before i became your girlfriend," you agreed with him.
but there's no worse lie than the one we tell ourselves, you realised too late.
hoshina soshiro took you to dates almost every weekend although he is also almost always late. but you guess being one of the highest-ranking official in an anti-kaiju division burdens him with a heavier obligation than the rest of the officers so you did what a good girlfriend would do: you tried to understand his situation and offered him comfort whenever you catch him overly stressed or fatigued in his tasks. "i'll make it up to you," he would promise, and you would kiss him on the lips.
but after a while he stopped asking you out entirely, blaming it to his busy schedule - and yours - and a month after that, you would see hoshina soshiro only when there are inter-division conferences. narumi gives you his ugliest frowns everytime he spots the vice-captain walking towards you. "get a room," the first division commander rolled his eyes at you and your boyfriend one time.
to be fair, hoshina is good at making you disregard his misgivings. may it be with his tongue or his fingers, even for just a fraction of an hour, you cannot deny that hoshina makes you feel loved and taken care of. hoshina would tell you he loves you and nothing else matters again in your world but those three little words.
you could have perfectly proceeded in your charade of being fine if hoshina only remembered your anniversary. the straw that broke the camel's back, disappointment and frustration and heart wrenching pain consumed you when it came clear to you that hoshina was not planning for some surprise for you after not giving you a single greeting throughout the day - he simply forgot.
"so it skipped you that today's supposed to be our day, but you had time to go to lunch with okonogi," you accused him, feeling a bit guilty that you are involving another person in the argument. the trip to tachikawa base was not short, and your muscles are already killing you, but you made the effort to see hoshina in hopes you can salvage the occasion. the guilt died down after several seconds when hoshina replied.
"how is okonogi-chan a part of this?" he defended her. it did not escape you how he seemed to not be answering you at all.
"okonogi-chan?" you mocked hoshina. "jesus, i am so tired of this!" you did not recognise the sound of your voice when you shouted. "i - i know what i signed up for when i compromised with you, soshiro. you said duties first, i just did not expect i would be at the bottom of the things you care about. that's if i was even in that list at all."
"that's not fair -"
"what's not fair," you gritted your teeth, "is that you keep treating me like shit." you held back your tears; you refused to cry in front of hoshina - you had already given him the power to hurt you, it would have been to much handing him the knowledge that what is happening is effectively breaking you from you within. softly, you determined to get the bottom of things - fuck your dignity, the most you can get from this scenario is hoshina's honesty. "do you still love me?"
"you know i do," he declared too quickly. hoshina strode towards you, crossing the three, four feet distance to reach you. grabbing your cold hands and attempting to cradle it with his own warm ones, hoshina looked sincere and sorry, and you regret that you cannot for the life of you remember the last time he was this tender with you.
"actually i don't." you did not know how you're supposed to bridge the sea between you and hoshina as you withdrew your clammy hands from his touch. you chose to ignore the sudden sadness that crossed his face when you stepped away from him.
the loud ring of the alarm announcing a kaiju attack echoed in your ears. "i have to go, we'll talk more later," hoshina offered, his stare at you was surely meant to glue you in your spot but you did not let it so. "i love you."
"no, wait." you are a defense officer, and a good one at that, and you thankfully did not have to remind the third division vice-captain of that. "i'm going with you." even on the verge of heartbreak, your response is to stand beside hoshina. you almost winced at the implication.
you did not wait for his approval. narumi will be pissed, he joked after seeing you in a battle suit, helping you out a bit as you pick your weapon of choice. "hey." his grip on your elbow distracted you. "be careful out there," he whispered.
bodies break in the strangest of ways, you found out while fighting a considerable strong honju alone in the sector where you were assigned. you weren't officially in the area to be on duty, and protocol says you cannot be under hoshina's command so you had to be borrowed as a back-up to another platoon. your tenure and experience could easily place you as a team leader, that is why you were confident to face a number of those monstrous creatures at once. that is until the suit you were wearing - just a spare one that hasn't been used yet by a recruit - overheated.
"retreat to somewhere safe," you heard hoshina in your in-ear comms, out of breath. "that's an order." you wanted to assert that he isn't really your commanding officer, that he is not upon him to command you in any way but air feels like liquid in your lungs, the exhaustion catching up to you. in a minute or two the suit will lose its integrity after overheating, and you will be vulnerable to attacks of even the smallest yojus. "stay there and i'll send someone -"
you hoped you were not making a habit of interrupting hoshina as you mustered your strength to speak in a firm sentence - "the mission, is to neutralise the kaiju, sir." you screwed your eyes shut, ignoring the searing sensation of the wound in your shoulder.
throwing caution in the wind, hoshina did not relent. "i will come get you."
"soldiers first, soshiro." the static in your in-ear comms was deafening after you had called the vice-captain by his given name, and knowing that whatever you say will be broadcasted to the other officers, you continued. "to hell with what happens to us, right?"
you couldn't say you recall what happened next. dizzying darkness claimed you as your suit gave out, your combat release putting your body to too much pressure. when you came to consciousness, it was at a hospital - in a white room too big to cater to only one patient. tubes were attached to you, needles poking at the delicate vein in your wrist. it hurts to move, it hurts to discover you woke up alone.
the hours passed, each tick of the hands of the clock racing against your own thoughts. a nurse found you awake while in a roaming duty, and alerted the doctor. it was not after that when you saw hoshina again.
"how are you feeling?" you could sense his awkwardness from across the room. you saw his hesitation to come close to you; you cannot decided whether to feel satisfied that he seems to be in pain seeing you like this.
"i can't do this anymore, soshiro." your throat was dry from not speaking in ages, and your words sounded hoarse, as if you had to scrape yourself for them. "i almost died, and i can't do this anymore."
a piece of you wanted for him to tell you to shut up.
"i could have died, and you weren't there. and my god, this entire time i had to assess if i am just selfish, or greedy, and i know there are people to save, but soshiro, it's tiring to be the one who loves the other more," you exclaimed. "maybe it's my mistake that i am in a relationship with the third division's vice-captain but i fell in love with hoshina soshiro."
"i'm sorry." you didn't miss the slight tremble in hoshina's voice, and your chest tightened because after everything, he couldn't say you what you needed to hear.
"i would have died trying to save you, you know," you added weakly.
"i'm sorry," he repeated like a chant, like some mantra that would cure everything damaged for you and for him.
"me too," you replied, because there was nothing else left to say.
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stxneflxwers · 3 months ago
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between just you & me.
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⋯⁂ summary. this is a birthday fic~
⋯⁂ a/n. as said in summary, this is a birthday fic. well, a belated birthday fic. for me. teehee. my birthday was on the 26th but whatever i can be late to my own birthday :D. btw i refuse to proof-read this. lol rip. this fic feels like an utter mess but whatever. this took forever to coherently come up with anyway. lol, lmao...
⋯⁂ characters. aventurine. gn reader.
⋯⁂ cw. all lowercase. fluffy-ish, teensy bit of hurt/comfort. eating (milkshakes and fries bc YUM). physical affection. reader heavily based on me cuz...it's...my birthday? don't like don't read ig. reader takes unspecified type(s) of medications. aventurine and reader struggling with disordered eating and/or small appetites.
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"happy, happy birthday~"
you heard a familiar chirp in your ear as you were still resting in bed. sure, you're sleeping in, but there's nothing wrong with that on your own birthday, right?
it's your boyfriend. he leans over you, all with a huge yet genuine grin on his handsome face. and, of course, holding a bag of your usual meal choice and your favorite milkshake from a delightful little old-fashioned restaurant that you hold in high regard.
you're about to scold him for breaking in again, and then you remember just in time that you had recently given him a spare key to your apartment. you sigh softly, relieved to know he didn't break in.
"...birthday?" you then ask, your bleary eyes and sleepy mind not quite there just yet.
yes, you very much forgot that it's your birthday. but, in your defense, you just woke up.
"yes, darling dearest, it's your birthday. i figured i'd get you a little treat to start off the day just right," aventurine coos as he takes a seat on the edge of your plush bed, right next to you. "want me to feed you~?" he teases.
"oh my god, no–" you fluster, a pout forming on your bottom lip and in your brows.
"heh," the sly gambler chuckles breathily, "alright, alright. you can feed yourself. i trust you're capable?" he laughs heartily when you (very weakly) punch his bicep.
"what a way to start my day – getting sassed by my own darling boyfriend first thing." you playfully roll your eyes, a wry smirk on your lips.
you slowly sit up against the headboard of your bed, letting your limbs stretch far and wide as you yawn. he thinks you look like an adorable kitty like this, and he's quickly overcome with the desire to cover your face in little kisses. but, almost out of instinct, he holds back on his affections. for now.
he hands over your bag of food and over-the-top milkshake, tenderly smiling at how your eyes light up at the sight.
"thank you so much, vasha," you murmur and lean over to press a chaste kiss to his cheek, he nearly blushes, "it really is a great way to start my morning, regardless of your sassing." you smirk, sounding far more confident when you give him a verbal jab to his side.
"no problem. i'm more than happy to indulge your cravings whenever." he hesitates, his hand stuttering mid-air, but he ultimately rubs your head a little.
"hmhm, good boy," you grin when he blushes faintly at the praise, "...do you want some?" you offer, picking out a french fry and holding it out to him.
he hesitates. almost visibly tensing up at the offer.
before he can reject the offer, you comfort him, "i don't mind, really. besides... i can hardly eat all of this myself. not to mention, did you even eat this morning–"
"did you take your meds last night?" he immediately retorts, interjecting. he loves you, but damn, he's concerned too, you know?
he had noticed that you missed your yesterday's evening medications as he passed through the bedroom to deliver your meal. he sighed when he noticed.
"i–" you sputter, "...is that why i'm feeling so weird right now?" you stare down at the crispy fry in your hand, eyes narrowing.
he snorts lightly, "probably." he jumps up to his feet, walking over to your desk to grab the circular medication container that's ordered by each day of the week. how convenient!
once you take your meds, you tentatively munch on your delightful food and milkshake. you wish you could share with him without him getting so evasive, even though you can strongly relate to his...aversions.
when he notices your slow, small bites, he frowns a little, "...you alright, sweetheart?"
you're quiet for a long moment. you two can barely lie to each other's faces. you know each other too well because you both experience similar emotions and thoughts – practically two peas in a pod.
"uhm..." you fluster, "oh, you know me... it's hard eating around others..." you sigh.
"do you want me to leave–"
"no! please, stay," you pout, grabbing his sleeve before he can leave, "you don't have to eat any, but please don't leave me alone too much today...?" you whisper, eyes darting away from his knowing stare.
"i promise i won't leave you today. at all." he quickly sits down next to you, allowing a tender smile that's reserved only for you to form on his face.
"thank you." you sigh in relief.
you two continue to chat, the subjects of conversation varying greatly – bouncing from topic to topic. at some point, he holds out his hand to request a fry, even though the tremble is obvious.
he wants to try as many times as possible, all for you.
and you'll gladly support him each step of the way.
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nouvxllev · 9 months ago
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Omg hi! Do you think you would ever do a sequel to head over heels, your hand over mine? Maybe where Jenna proposes?
your hand over mine, my ring over yours
Pairing: Jenna Ortega x Fem!Reader
Summary: ^ request!!
Words: 2.8k
Warnings: damn this is shorter than what i expected
a/n: the obvious answer is yes i (do) will!!
prev. || masterlist.
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"Why did you say yes to him anyway?" Jenna's voice, now your girlfriend (awesome as hell, you may add), echoed over the room. Mic in between both of her hands as she sways side to side over you.
The both of you decided to stay in the karaoke booth for a while, it was a waste of money after all. Your money, might you add. The guy didn't even bother to pay for it!
You shrugged, watching her figure fall into place beside you, a song chosen by Jenna playing in the background. "I needed to move on from you. It was clear I didn't have a chance."
Jenna's eyes narrowed, you could see her eyebrows crinkling even in the dimly lit room. "Move on? Didn't have a chance?"
You nodded, almost laughing at how the mic was still in direct contact with her lips, you were avoiding direct eye contact but it was so clear that Jenna was fuming.
"I seriously can't believe there's someone out there so oblivious and it's you." You heard her chuckle, yet her voice was soft. You expected her to get mad at you by the way she started her sentence, but you forgot she was the one who ran (not really) over here and confessed to you all so abruptly.
"Weren't the flowers and hundreds of letters mailed to your doorstep enough to hint that I liked you?"
You scratched your head, a sheepish smile playing on your lips. "Okay, in my defense, I just thought you were being extra friendly. Who wouldn't want a friend who sends flowers and letters, right?"
Jenna shook her head, letting go of the mic and crossing her arms. "I was practically spelling it out. All that was missing was dropping down on one knee and proposing to you."
You raised an eyebrow, "hey to be fair, my mom was the one who gave you the motivation."
Jenna shrugged, nodding her head with a smile. "Yeah, I owe her one."
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That was five years ago.
Now it was your 5th anniversary with Jenna.
You lay at your bed with Jenna’s headphones on, staring at the ceiling for God knows how long, doing your best to fall asleep without Jenna’s warmth and presence beside you. It was difficult, difficult than it should be. You were the daughter of the Winona Ryder, damn it! Why couldn’t you go for months without the love of your life by your side.
Ever since you and Jenna got together, everyone was, of course, not surprised but they were happy nonetheless. Hell, you even took up acting just because you can be one of Jenna’s love interests in a movie. Of course, that could be a hassle for the directors whenever it was a kissing scene. They have to yell “cut!” In front of your faces to get the both of you to stop.
Now you couldn’t help but wallow in your own sadness because there weren’t two arms wrapped around your waist and a familiar warmth along your bed for the past and next two months.
All day, you've been binging Jenna's interviews, shows, and movies to the point you can rehearse them in the back of your head.
The room felt emptier without Jenna's presence. You noticed how she was returning so late at night, how her filming dates often varied so random you couldn't even be there or keep track, how she took up almost any part she was given to her, how she often came home looking so overworked and stress you couldn't even talk to her without fearing that she'd blow up on you. And now she's all the way across the country to film another movie.
The film industry often meant sacrificing personal time apart from the holidays, and Jenna seemed to be giving it all.
Yet she always gives you that damn smile, you couldn't possibly think she's falling out of love. But it still worried you why she was doing all of this.
She was hardworking and passionate, it was part of what made her so lovable, but you couldn't help but worry about how it was affecting her.
You sat on the edge of the bed, lost in thought, you could text or call her but you knew it wasn't going to be seen for atleast another three to four hours. You didn't doubt her love, it was one of the many things you couldn't, but the worry was still there.
That was until you got a notification.
j 🤍🎧
i missed u too yn o right can u check outside for a minute? i think i mailed a package outside your room might be beside the living room, i asked them to deliver it there personally seen, 11:44 PM
The only thought that ran across your mind was 'They can do that?'
Slipping on a pair of slippers, you made your way to the living room, your steps being pulled down by whatever weight that was on your shoulders.
Jenna's message made you happy, of course, the distance seemed a little bit smaller but you couldn't help but wish she said something more than requesting you to pick up her package. Maybe a simple little 'I love you and happy anniversary' would have been something to put you at ease.
As you turned the doorknob and stepped into the living room, the fluorescent light shining from the living room made your eyes burn like hell. You squinted, but that didn't really help, you tried to adjust to the light, putting your palm above your eyes.
"Why is she always across the country," you murmured to yourself, "why are you like this, Jenna?" Your voice started to get louder and louder once you started to speak to yourself even more. You were going insane, that's the most part, but who wouldn't. "Why couldn't you just choose a project closer to home for once..." It was selfish to ask for, too selfish to make Jenna choose you over her career, but you couldn't help it.
"Does she even love me..." Your voice trailed off when you turned the corner to the living room.
Oh, what the actual fuck.
It would be an understatement to say that the living room had been turned upside down. Everything was lit up, and everything was rearranged. Hell, there was a fucking balloon arch with Jenna at the center of it all while the couches were pushed back as if it was an aisle to a wedding ceremony.
Damn, were you that depressed to the point you couldn't even hear what the fuck was going on outside your room for Jenna to transform it into this?
You couldn't say anything. Every word that was about to come out of your mouth left before your mind can even process what was happening.
Without uttering a single word, you ran towards her, your heart pounding in your chest you wouldn't be surprised if you'd have a mid-crisis heart attack. You wrapped your arms around Jenna as if she was something so untouchable, burying your face in her neck as you melted within her presence, her scent mixing in with hers as she took a step back to hold you dearly.
Her comforting warmth was a fix even you can’t tolerate. Jenna was in your arms like before, her body fitting perfectly against yours, her soul reminding you why you were alive up until this point.
Your grip on her tightened, holding on to her as tears slowly started to stain her clothes, clinging onto Jenna as if she were a mirage about to disappear from your desperate arms.
"I missed you too." Jenna's voice broke through you, your tears coming in further. Her voice was soft and tender, coming as a whisper that soothed your troubles.
"How? Why?" You murmured, your voice mumbled and tear-streaked as you lifted your head to face her. Puffy eyes and all because of your crying. "Why are you here?" Your voice cracked, "I thought you wouldn't be back for another two months." You searched for something in Jenna's eyes, something that you longed to see once again.
Jenna gently wiped away a tear from your cheek, you missed how her touch was the most reassuring thing in the world. "I heard that Winona was out of the country for filming, and it's our anniversary." It was so little for the explanation but it said everything.
You pulled back once Jenna started rummaging out of her pocket, you watch Jenna pull out a small box.
Wait, holy fuck.
"Jenna, holy shit, is that—"
"Yes, yes it is that." She chuckled, nonchalantly, as if she didn’t just swoon you for the millionth time in the past minute, turned your living room into a makeshift wedding ceremony, and is now proposing to you.
"You can't be serious. Jenna if this is just some joke I'm actually breaking up with you."
"No, no, y/n! Of course it's not. I'm being completely serious."
She fiddled with the box, not opening it yet as you stood there with eyes wide open.
"I'm sorry," she began, her voice vulnerable and sincere as she looked up to you, "I'm sorry I haven't been around. I'm sorry I keep coming back home looking stressed, I'm sorry I took up too many auditions and movies that I can hold myself up to, I'm sorry I couldn't spare even a single minute of my time loving you as much as I did before, I'm sorry I made you worry countless of times, more than I can count even. I'm sorry I haven't been the partner you deserve."
She continued, on and on until tears welled up in your eyes once more. "I know I've been distant, I know I've caused pain in you for the past months, maybe even years and I know I've let my career consume me."
"I don't have any excuses for it." Her voice dwindled, almost cracking as she looked up, trying not to cry as she laughed. "But I did all of it for a ring that would bind us forever. It's not the—"
You couldn't help but push your lips against hers, cutting her sentence off. You missed this. How your pain went away with a kiss.
"It's the perfect excuse."
Her vulnerability touched your heart, she had never been more vulnerable to you than now, you gently reached out to gently wipe away the tears that had begun to fall from her eyes. "Jenna, it's okay," you reassured her as you noticed her lips started to tremble. "I understand. I understand all of it, all of you."
Jenna's gaze met yours once she started to calm down. And there you saw it, something you searched for in her eyes ever since she landed on your doorstep this evening. Devotion.
You kissed her once more, whispering, "You know how many people would kill to be your wife?" You didn't let her open the box just yet, you held back. You know she has more to say.
Jenna, with tears of joy still glistening in her eyes, chuckled at your words. "You'd die and kill. That's the difference between you and others. You'd die for our love, and you'd fight for it with everything you have, and I think that's morbidly fascinating." She explained, "and what do you mean?"
"I'm saying that are you sure you want to marry me? I mean, there are so many people in the world you haven't met." You explained, your lips trembling.
"I could meet all of them in a single file and yet, you would still be the one who enchants me," Jenna replied, brushing a strand of hair away from your face.
"I love too much."
"I'll let you pour all your loving on me, or love everyone in the world but me. Just stay by my side. That's all I ask."
"I cry too easily. Over the simplest of things."
"I'll let you cry an ocean that surrounds every inch of you and I'd swim across everything."
"I get mad more often than not."
"I'll let you throw storms my way, express your angry through disasters upon disasters and I'll be there for all eternity even if it kills me."
"I doubt myself too much. I don't even know if I love myself."
"I'll let you love yourself before you have a chance to love me. Doubt may knock on your door, but I'll be there to answer."
"I can be difficult to handle."
"I'll let you be someone you're not at times. I'll be the one to show understanding and how to love yourself before loving me yet again.
"I'm scared of losing you, too scared for you to even love me that much."
"Then let me take your hand, and let me show you that my love couldn't waver over. Even at death I'll call his name and let me live once more with you. I'll wish in every star that in every universe, we are together. I want you to see that I'm not going anywhere."
"You know you'd eventually drown if my love for you was an ocean."
"Then let me die," Jenna whispered, a smile gracing both of your lips, her eyes filled with that same devotion and commitment you saw five years ago.
You chuckled,"We have odd ways of saying I love yous."
"Well, I am proposing to you in your living room late at night. It's accounted for." Jenna laughed softly along with you, her eyes sparkling with affection as she leaned in to press a kiss to your lips, your mouth curving into a smile as she did so.
"Reminds me that you haven't said those five words yet."
"Oh right."
"Y/n," she got down on one knee, her hand on top of the box as she prepared to open it, "You're one marvelous, just spectacular girl I've ever met. I'm so fucking happy Winona decided to tag you along that day," she chuckled.
"Every chore wouldn't be the same without your presence by my side, and my presence beside yours, I don't want to ever imagine that. My heart surrendered to your precious eyes, and I say it truly from the deepest depths of my heart that it has no plans of bail. Wherever you go, I follow. I don't want you to be the only one suffering a burden that would eventually kill you, I don't want you to be alone in your times of darkness. So please, let me be the one who will carry your burdens, your sadness, your everything. Let me be the one who will scar and carve my heart and skin for you to dump your sadness and let me carry it with a proud heart. When I die, my spirit will do everything in its power to regain the same feeling when I was alive with you. How does one understand the great love you've given me that would last millions of lifetimes, y/n? You became the reason why I now wake up with a smile, and why I became the happiest version of myself. And now, I can't think of a better grave of eternal slumber than in your beloved arms. Thank you."
The sincerity in her words left a big hole in your heart, but it was nothing but mere content and happiness. Tears welled up in your eyes as she spoke.
"Will you, Y/N/L/N, marry me?" Jenna opened the box, the ring almost blinding your eyes. Ethereal was out of the question to describe it, it was too marvelous for words. It was diamond, of course, but it had other gems that symbolized something more than love.
"Yes. Yes, Jenna!" you exclaimed, "Yes, I will." You could almost say that a million times and not get tired of it. Especially when Jenna is looking at you as if you held the stars and the moon with your bare hands.
She chuckled, standing up as she waited for you to offer your hand. "Isn't it yes I do?"
You grinned, it was an understatement to say that your heart was brimming with pure joy and happiness. "When it comes to you, it's definitely not." You offered your hand to Jenna, her fingers tracing your hand as she delicately placed the ring on your finger. It felt like a promise because it was. You gazed at it with awe, it was more than a piece of jewelry on your hands, it was Jenna. It was Jenna entirely. Her person, her love, her soul, her everything on your hand.
"You look simply gorgeous. Oh my God, I can't believe I'm marrying you," Jenna squealed, her happiness infectious and heartwarming.
"That's my line," you jokingly laughed. "And isn't it gorgeous?"
"No, you're gorgeous. The ring is just a bonus," Jenna replied, staring at you instead of the ring she probably spent hundreds of sleepless nights over. How this woman loves you was beyond anything of human comprehension.
"I love you so much, even you, Jenna Ortega, couldn't describe it." You wrapped your arms around her waist, sealing the deal with a kiss on her lips once again. You never got tired of it.
"I love you too."
You pulled away, a smile lingered on your lips, knowing that no matter how many times you kissed Jenna, it would never be enough to represent the love you had for her.
With your hand over hers, and her ring over your finger, you couldn't imagine a life without her anymore.
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a/n: i finished reading 7 husbands of evelyn hugo the other day and i cried so much. its such a great book!! i might do a story based off of it. i just dont know what jo characters should i do for the pairing
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marsplastic13 · 4 months ago
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'Complicated' (part 6) - Kaz Brekker x Reader
Idea - Kaz Brekker hires a prostitute to overcome his touch aversion, and be a better man for Inej, but things take an unxepected turn. Pairing: Kaz Brekker x Prostitute!Reader, (had to use y/n because I'm bad at names) Genre: modern AU, slow burn word count: 4.8k notes: this is one of my favorite parts, let me know if you like it!!
@millercontracting @coldmermaidhologram @syd649
Kaz stepped out of the shower feeling drained, both physically and emotionally. He collapsed onto the bed, his mind a whirlwind of conflicting thoughts and memories from the evening with y/n. The incessant vibrations of his phone interrupted his attempt to find peace.
With a heavy sigh, he checked the notifications. Fifteen messages from y/n, three from Jesper, and one from Inej wishing him goodnight. Guilt twisted in his gut; he had abruptly left y/n's house, leaving behind a mess of emotions and unanswered questions.
Their attempt at intimacy had started with good intentions. Kaz had tried his best, using his hands to pleasure y/n as they had discussed. He felt her respond, melting under his touch, her moans guiding him in the right direction. y/n's encouragement spurred him on, reinforcing that he was making her feel alive and desired.
But then came the moment when she asked him to go further, to insert a finger. Panic seized Kaz like a vice. The sensations overwhelmed him, dredging up memories he had tried to bury. Wet, sticky, drowning—those feelings crashed over him, triggering a panic attack he hadn't experienced in months.
y/n had tried to reach him, her voice a lifeline in the chaos, but Kaz couldn't hear her. In a haze of fear and confusion, he fled, escaping from the situation and from himself.
Lying on the bed now, thoughts of Inej haunted him. He imagined her peacefully wishing him goodnight, unaware of the turmoil he was facing. They were drifting apart, he realized sadly, their connection strained by his own struggles and insecurities. The thought of their upcoming reunion offered a flicker of hope, a chance to mend what felt broken.
The text from y/n flashed on Kaz's screen like a warning signal. 'I swear I'm coming to your house if you don't answer me' it read. Kaz stared at it, torn between the desire to explain himself and the overwhelming urge to be left alone. He knew y/n was worried, but he couldn't face anyone right now, not even her.
In an attempt to ease her concern without having to engage in conversation, Kaz transferred the money he forgot to give her, hoping it would serve as a reassurance that he was alright and prompt her to drop the matter. But instead of quieting her, his phone immediately lit up with an incoming call from her.
Reluctantly, he answered. "Yeah?"
"Kaz, are you okay?" y/n's voice was laced with genuine worry, cutting through his defenses.
"Yes, I'm better now," he replied softly, hoping to convey that he wasn't in immediate danger.
"You could've answered me," she chided gently, her concern palpable. "I was worried sick."
"You shouldn't have been," Kaz deflected, unable to bear the weight of her concern.
"Are you kidding? You left my house completely out of yourself. I thought you drove straight into a tree," she confessed, her worry turning into frustration.
Kaz winced at the image she painted. Driving in his state had indeed been reckless, a fact he couldn't deny. "Well, I didn't," he murmured, feeling a pang of guilt.
"I want to sleep now," Kaz added hastily, hoping to end the conversation before it delved further into his vulnerabilities.
He heard y/n sigh heavily on the other end. "Go fuck yourself, Kaz," she retorted softly, a mix of exasperation and affection in her voice.
Kaz closed his eyes, feeling the weight of the day bearing down on him.
***
The tension from the past few days had been building, and now he found himself standing outside y/n's door, late at night, unsure of what to expect. He knocked tentatively, almost hoping she wouldn't answer, but when she did, his heart sank a little.
y/n opened the door, wearing only panties and a crop top, looking tired but still striking. Her casual demeanor contrasted sharply with Kaz's turmoil. "I was about to smoke weed and watch House, what the fuck do you want?" she greeted him bluntly.
Kaz hesitated, then slowly pulled some cash from his pocket and handed it to her. She glanced at it, then back at him. "She's coming tomorrow, right?" she asked, her tone implying she already knew the answer.
It was Kaz's turn to hesitate. "I really like House," he blurted out awkwardly, trying to lighten the mood.
y/n sighed and accepted the money, stepping aside to let him in. The room was almost completely dark. They both understood the unspoken rule—if she didn't take the money, their interaction would mean something entirely different. In the dim light, Kaz undressed and climbed into bed, feeling the unsettling mix of familiarity and detachment.
y/n sat on the desk, rolling a blunt with practiced ease. Kaz observed her silently, struck by how natural she seemed in this setting. She tossed him the tablet. "The first drag is to share or it's ten years of bad sex," she said with a smirk as she lit it.
"You just made that up," Kaz chuckled. y/n inhaled deeply, then leaned in to blow the smoke into his mouth, their lips almost touching. He closed his eyes, savoring the moment before exhaling slowly.
They settled into bed—Kaz on his back with the tablet balanced on his stomach, and y/n nestled beside him, her head on his shoulder and a leg draped over his. He placed a hand on her thigh, the intimacy of the touch not lost on either of them. As she passed the blunt between them, Kaz squeezed her thigh gently each time, a silent acknowledgment of gratitude.
They watched the episode in comfortable silence, interrupted only by Kaz's occasional comments about how the actor didn’t know how to really use a cane. "Should I light another one?" y/n asked when the first blunt was finished. Kaz nodded, watching her move gracefully around the room. He couldn't help but admire how effortlessly sexy she was, even in such mundane actions.
When y/n blew the first drag into his mouth again, Kaz realized he had seen others do it and found it incredibly alluring. Another thing he was experiencing for the first time with her.
They continued sharing the blunt and watching the show until Kaz's thoughts turned impulsive. "I don't know how to put on a condom," he blurted out, his mind clouded by the effects of the weed. y/n seemed unfazed by his confession.
"Do you think you'll have sex?" she asked casually, her eyes still fixed on the tablet.
"No, it's still too soon," Kaz replied quickly.
"Do you want me to teach you?" she offered, her tone matter-of-fact.
"Yes," Kaz admitted, feeling a mix of embarrassment and determination. He wasn't sure if Inej knew how to do it, but he wanted to be prepared, or at least have a plausible excuse for being here.
"Great, but first, kill this," y/n said, passing him the blunt with the last two drags. "It's easier than you think."
Hesitantly, Kaz inhaled, then leaned in to blow the smoke into her mouth, feeling a surge of heat at the intimate gesture.
"So, show me," y/n prompted, her usual playful grin teasing Kaz's nerves. He frowned for a moment, then reluctantly looked down at his lap.
"Where do you put a condom, Kaz?" she asked, her tone teasing yet instructive.
Feeling somewhat foolish, Kaz hesitated. "I... you know I won't do that," he muttered, suddenly aware of his boundaries. Some things should remain between him and Inej, even if he was stoned enough to forget that.
"I know, I was testing my luck," y/n replied nonchalantly, getting up to retrieve a box from a drawer. She tossed vibrators and dildos onto the bed, making Kaz regret his request even more. "Choose one that's most similar," she instructed, pulling out a handful of condoms from another drawer.
Grateful for the darkness that hid his embarrassment, Kaz picked one without much thought. y/n raised an eyebrow. "Come on, baby, I felt it, you're being modest," she teased.
"Why do you always have to make things harder for me?" Kaz sighed, looking up at her with a mixture of exasperation and affection.
"Do you hear yourself? You serve them on a silver platter," she laughed. y/n slipped into teaching mode, and Kaz found himself oddly satisfied with his progress, despite the awkwardness of the situation. "Don't get cocky, darling. You won't be this relaxed when you're about to have sex for the first time, and real skin is much slippery," she warned, stuffing a handful of condoms into the pocket of his jacket. "Try them out at home to find the right fit."
"Damn, weed makes me so horny," she commented, settling back onto the bed beside him. "And so wet, I—"
"y/n, oversharing," Kaz interjected, amused yet also caught off guard by her candidness.
"Right, sorry," she smirked knowingly. "Do you ever touch yourself?"
Surprisingly, Kaz didn't feel as embarrassed as he thought he would, thanks to the weed. "Rarely. Sometimes even my own touch bothers me."
"When was the last time?" y/n inquired, her eyes challenging him with playful curiosity.
"Um, I think that time we kissed for three hours," Kaz admitted with a slight flush creeping into his cheeks.
"Did you think of me?" y/n's question was direct, her eyes searching his for an honest answer.
Kaz's hesitation was enough to let her know the answer. His brain seemed to have memorized every whisper and moan, replaying them with absurd accuracy.
"I thought about you too," y/n confessed with a smile that suggested she found their connection intriguing.
Shaking his head in disbelief, Kaz chuckled softly. "Did you, now?"
"I'm not embarrassed, Kaz. You know that," she laughed softly, moving closer to him.
"Do you think about your clients often?" he asked, half-serious, half-teasing as he pulled her into his lap.
"Some of them," she replied coyly, her face dangerously close to his.
"Kaz, stop looking at me like that. Your girlfriend is coming," y/n whispered, her lips brushing against his teasingly.
"I paid you. I'm just a client," Kaz replied, trying to maintain a distance that felt increasingly fragile.
"Then why are you hesitating?" y/n countered softly, her gaze searching for him.
"I just wanted to look at you," Kaz murmured truthfully, his resolve wavering.
"Kaz, are you about to tell me I'm beautiful?" she teased with a smirk.
"No," Kaz insisted, his voice firm yet tinged with uncertainty, he definitely was. "I want to try it again. I want to..." He paused, sighing deeply as he struggled to articulate his desire. "To get you off."
"Baby, don't ask me things hoping I'll refuse," y/n replied with a playful tap on his nose. "I'm working right now. I can't say no."
"I want to," Kaz reiterated more firmly this time, his resolve clear despite the nerves fluttering in his stomach. He knew this was crossing a line, pushing their arrangement into uncharted territory. Yet, something in him yearned to explore further, to delve into the intimacy they had danced around for so long.
Their eyes met in the dimly lit room, each silently acknowledging the unspoken tension that crackled between them. y/n regarded him with a mix of curiosity and amusement, as if testing his resolve. Kaz held her gaze, his heart pounding with a mixture of anticipation and fear.
"Kaz," she began softly, her tone taking on a more serious note, "you know the rules. This isn't just about you anymore."
He nodded, acknowledging her point. The boundaries were clear—they were here because of an arrangement, a transaction. Yet, the air around them was thick with unspoken desires and uncharted territories.
"But," she continued, her voice lowering to a whisper, "if you're sure..."
"I'm sure," Kaz interrupted, his voice steady now. He reached out, gently brushing a stray lock of hair away from her face. "I want to."
y/n hesitated, her eyes searching his face for any hint of doubt. Finding none, she nodded slowly, a small smile tugging at the corners of her lips. "Okay," she murmured, almost to herself as if affirming the decision.
Without further hesitation, Kaz closed the distance between their lips, tasting the familiar hint of cherries. This time, his touch was confident, tracing paths along her body with purpose. Her satisfied sounds were like music to him, and he found himself reveling in the moment.
Kaz's fingers moved with increasing determination, feeling her arousal through the fabric of her panties. She grew restless under his touch, prompting Kaz to gather his courage. He slid a finger inside gently, feeling her react with a gratifying gasp. He wished he had a video of how she threw her head back—it would be the only porn he'd willingly watch.
Taking his time to adjust to the sensation, Kaz met y/n's desire with each movement. "Another one, please," she requested breathlessly, her eyes filled with longing.
"Kaz, love, you're driving me crazy," she whispered, her voice trembling slightly. "Go faster."
Lost in her responsiveness, Kaz kissed her deeply, savoring her moans. y/n interrupted their kiss intermittently, praising him, asking for more. He enjoyed how demanding she was, each demand boosting his confidence.
"I'm so close, love. Just for you," she gasped, her body tensing under his touch. "Come for me, darling," Kaz whispered, the words slipping past his lips with a mix of urgency and tenderness. He watched as y/n's eyes opened in surprise, a fleeting moment of vulnerability passing between them before her body tensed under his touch. She closed her eyes again, surrendering to the sensations he was coaxing from her.
Kaz felt a surge of pride and relief as he felt her body relax against his, the tension melting away in the aftermath of her climax. He pressed his lips gently against her temple, savoring the closeness and the intimacy of the moment they had shared.
Slowly, he withdrew his fingers, mindful of her sensitivity.
Kaz lay back on the bed, staring at the ceiling as he processed what had just happened. He felt a mix of exhilaration and unease, realizing how far he had pushed their boundaries tonight. As much as he wanted to convince himself it was just business, he couldn't ignore the undeniable connection they shared.
"You're too sweet for me," she murmured between heavy breaths, trying to steady herself. "I want to ruin you," she added, her fingers tracing his lips with a mischievous smile.
Kaz was surprised, he had no idea what she meant, but she distracted him right after. "Are you hungry?"
Kaz nodded. Smoking had made him really hungry. "I can make noodles if you want," she said. "I'm starving."
"Now?" he frowned, still feeling the remnants of their earlier intimacy.
"Yes, now, come on," she got up and changed into a fresh pair of underwear, keeping the crop top.
"I really need a minute to—"
"No one is around, let's go."
"I'm half naked."
"Me too," she said with a wink, her casualness making him smile despite himself. 
In the kitchen, y/n assured him that she didn't need help and started moving between cupboards and stoves. Kaz leaned back in his chair, watching her with a mix of curiosity and admiration. She moved with ease, her confidence captivating him.
"How hungry are you?" he asked, noticing the large quantity of things she was cutting. She smiled, a glint of mischief in her eyes.
"You'll see."
Kaz felt like his eyes were glued to her, following every movement she made in the kitchen. As y/n moved between the cupboards and stoves, her graceful motions and focused demeanor captivated him. He watched as she effortlessly reached for ingredients.
When y/n tried to reach the upper shelf of the cupboard, Kaz noticed her struggling despite standing on her toes. Instinctively, he got up to help her, feeling a rush of protective instinct.
“Wait, I’ll take it. What do you need?” His voice was softer than usual, a stark contrast to his usual guarded demeanor. He moved behind her, and she gestured toward a red box on the top shelf. Leaning in, Kaz’s chest pressed lightly against her back, and he placed a hand on her waist as he reached for the box.
Their proximity caused a strange flutter in Kaz’s chest. He handed her the box, but instead of moving away immediately, he lingered, studying her reaction. y/n turned to look at him, her expression unreadable, which both intrigued and disarmed him.
"Why do you have to be such a tease?"
"What did I do?" he asked, genuinely confused, as he went back to his chair. y/n shook her head, going back to her pots.
Finally, she placed two plates in front of them, sitting on his lap. "There are three more chairs," he observed half annoyed, but curling an arm around her waist anyway.
“Just wait,” she replied with a playful glint in her eye. “Is it good?”
Kaz couldn't contain a satisfied hum when he started eating. It was really, really good. Or maybe it was just 3 am, and he was stoned and he could still smell the orgasm he made her reach on her skin. Everything felt surreal and intensely vivid.
A few minutes later, they started hearing noises, and her three roommates peeked into the kitchen. Kaz was really grateful that she was sitting on him, covering him up a bit. 
"Did you make noodles?" asked roommate one, with sleepy eyes, already grabbing a plate.
"Yes, but you can have them only if you promise to behave," said y/n amused.
"I promise," repeated the girls all together.
“So, what’s going on with you two?” another roommate asked, her curiosity clear despite her sleepy demeanor.
“Nothing,” y/n shrugged, a mischievous smile playing on her lips. “Yeah, like we don’t know your after-sex face,” one of the roommates teased, causing Kaz to nearly choke on his food.
"Nothing happened," she insisted, laughing at the absurdity.
"y/n, it's 3 am, you made noodles that you're actually eating, and you are fucking loud," added roommate three.
"You promised to behave," y/n scolded them, but there was no real anger in her voice.
Kaz hugged her tightly, feeling the warmth of her body against his. The girls kept their playful banter going, and for the first time in a long while, Kaz started to feel weirdly at ease. He couldn't believe he was with four prostitutes, all half naked, himself included, eating and kind of enjoying himself.
"So Kaz," asked roommate one, "is it true that you have a job shadier than ours?"
A small laugh escaped his lips as he leaned back in the chair, dragging y/n back with him. "You could say that," he admitted, making them giggle, "but you know, I heard some strange things staying here, so maybe the shadiness is equal."
"Are you still hungry?" asked y/n softly, looking at his empty plate.
"Maybe," he said, involuntarily gazing at her lips. 
y/n got up to fill his plate again, and the girls started laughing at the face he made. "y/n, you should make him promise to behave too," laughed roommate two.
"Shut up," she retorted, going back to his lap.
Kaz wrapped his arms around her again, feeling a sense of belonging he hadn't expected. The strange, comforting domesticity of the moment made him realize how starved he was for simple human connection, for a feeling of being part of something, even if just for a fleeting night.
As the conversation flowed and the banter between y/n and her roommates continued, Kaz found himself drawn into their playful teasing and laughter.
"Did she tell you about her new boyfriend?" Roommate three smirked mischievously, glancing at y/n with a knowing look.
"No, she didn't," Kaz replied, eyeing y/n curiously and poking her side lightly.
"So, you are embarrassed about him," Roommate one chimed in triumphantly, raising an eyebrow at y/n.
"I'm not!" y/n protested half-heartedly, a playful glint in her eyes.
"He's 50," Roommate two blurted out suddenly, causing Kaz to raise his eyebrows in surprise.
"What?" Kaz turned to y/n, his curiosity piqued.
"He still didn't sleep with her because he's afraid she's going to give him a heart attack," Roommate three added with a chuckle, earning a playful swat from y/n.
"She told him she's a pilates instructor," Roommate one added with a grin.
"Girls, come on," y/n laughed along with them, "he's cute."
"Where did you even find him?" Kaz asked, genuinely curious now, his earlier worries about Inej momentarily forgotten in the midst of their light-hearted banter.
"I'm not telling you," y/n replied coyly, leaning back against Kaz's chest, her demeanor relaxed and carefree. "I'm not telling anyone anything, you bunch of snakes."
The teasing continued into the early hours of the morning, their laughter filling the kitchen and easing the tension that had hung in the air earlier. Kaz found himself caught up in their laughs, enjoying the distraction and the genuine warmth of y/n and her roommates.
They talked and joked until 6 am, their conversation ranging from light-hearted gossip to shared stories and playful teasing. Despite the late hour, Kaz didn’t realize he hadn't once thought about his girlfriend during their time together.
As exhaustion finally caught up with them, Kaz found himself drifting off to sleep in y/n's bed, his head nestled comfortably in the crook of her neck. 
He was jolted awake by the insistent buzzing of his phone two hours later. Inej. Inej would be arriving in a few hours. What the fuck was he doing?
“Turn it off,” whined y/n beside him, her voice thick with sleep.
He glanced at the screen, seeing he had already missed two calls from her. Panic surged through him as he quickly disentangled himself from y/n. 
“Hi, Kaz. Did I wake you?” asked Inej as soon as he answered.
“Yeah, am I late? Are you already here?” he asked, worried.
“No,” she laughed, “I was supposed to arrive in a few hours. Did you forget?” Her laugh was meant to lighten the mood, but Kaz couldn’t shake the feeling of unease.
“Nej, what do you mean ‘supposed to’?”
Inej hesitated. “Something came up. I can’t come this week.”
“Something came up? You promised,” he said, unable to hide his hurt.
“I know, but Kaz, I might have a lead about some slavers. I can’t back out from that.”
Kaz knew she was right, but he couldn’t help feeling a wave of frustration and disappointment. “You could’ve told me sooner,” he said harshly.
“I knew it on my way to the airport,” she admitted.
“You’re always ready to leave me waiting like an idiot,” he snapped before he could stop himself.
“Excuse me? Are you mad at me? You know this is important.”
“Well, for me, it was important seeing you today.”
“I have to go, Kaz. Have a nice day.”
Kaz sighed heavily, staring at the phone in disbelief. He couldn’t believe what had just happened. Defeated, he sat back on the bed, feeling a strange sense of relief mingled with guilt.
“She’s not coming?” asked y/n without opening her eyes, her voice still sleepy.
“No, she’s not,” he admitted quietly.
“I’m sorry, baby,” she murmured, reaching out to touch his arm.
“Thanks,” Kaz replied, feeling unsure of what the right thing to do was. “I had the whole day planned,” he chuckled dryly, “I’m a fucking idiot.”
“You’re not. How could you know?”
“And you? Plans?” he asked, shifting the conversation to y/n, perfectly aware of the risks.
“Just going to the gym, cleaning my room, nothing important. I’m off from work. Can you get my birth control pill? It’s in the nightstand.”
Kaz got up and fetched the small pill from the blister pack. y/n stuck out her tongue, and he carefully placed it on it, a small smile forming on his lips at the playful gesture.
“Can we sleep a few more hours?” Kaz asked, exhausted from the sleepless night and the heavy disappointment.
“Of course, love. Come here.”
Kaz crawled back into bed, finding comfort in her warmth. As he settled down, he realized he felt less guilty about his time with y/n. The ache of Inej’s absence still lingered, but in y/n's arms, he found a fleeting solace. He closed his eyes, hoping to escape into sleep and away from the turmoil of his emotions.
They slept until the early hours of the afternoon, the haze of the night lingering as Kaz dropped y/n off at the gym. His mind was a whirl of thoughts as he drove to meet Jesper. He needed to vent about Inej, about everything, and Jesper was always a willing ear.
Jesper was in a good mood, and luckily, he didn't mention y/n. Kaz spent the next hour unloading his frustrations about Inej, feeling abandoned by her constant absence. Inej didn't call, didn't text, too caught up in whatever she was doing. Kaz really wanted to get drunk, but he had to work that night. The boss wanted him to close some deals, and he couldn't afford to mess up.
As he tried to focus on organizing his papers, Kaz's mind kept drifting back to the previous night. How surreal and good it had been. y/n's friends were actually funny, all a bit deranged. He suspected that if he hadn't been there, their conversation would have escalated to something else pretty quickly.
y/n was always in his mind, and he knew that it was wrong, that they were blurring the boundaries of their relationship too much, but Kaz couldn't help but feel less lonely than he had ever been in his entire life. He tried to remind himself that he paid her for that time together, but the connection was undeniable. If she didn't think that they were at least friends, she was an Oscar-deserving actress.
As if y/n read his mind, she sent him a picture. Apparently, she was watching the last episode of their show. His show, he corrected himself, there was no 'them.' Kaz replied with a picture of his messy desk.
‘Poor baby, working late?’ she wrote back.
He wondered if she texted this often even with other clients, but his mind refused to acknowledge the possibility.
‘Luckily I slept all morning,’ he replied.
‘Did you enjoy snoring in my ear?’
‘Very much.’
‘I’ll tape your mouth shut next time.’
Kaz skipped a beat reading ‘next time.’ They were playing with each other, but he was the one who had something to lose. His relationship was at stake, and Inej's constant distance didn't help. He never had a problem with the distance in their relationship until he found out how much he liked having someone close. At the start, he was almost grateful that Inej was never there—fewer occasions to let her see how inadequate he was to fit the boyfriend role. He used to thank Ghezen that she decided to stay with him anyway.
But now that he discovered that he could be more, more present, closer, Kaz was starting to worry about the distance between them. Inej had always been the girl he loved, the only one he had ever fallen for. It had always been them, long before deciding to have an official relationship. y/n was making him discover that he was so much more, that his limits could be pushed further than he thought, and that for doing it, he needed to have someone close.
Kaz felt a surge of guilt as he reflected on this. How could he have allowed things to get so complicated? Inej had been his rock, his constant in a world full of chaos. She was the girl who knew his darkest secrets and still chose to love him. Yet, here he was, entangled with someone else who made him feel alive in ways he never knew were possible.
The realization was unsettling. Kaz prided himself on being in control, on keeping his emotions in check. But with y/n, everything was different. She brought out a side of him that he had buried long ago, a side that craved closeness and connection. He couldn't deny that their time together was more than just a transaction. It was real, and it scared him.
Kaz wondered if Inej sensed the change in him. She was perceptive, often seeing through his facades with ease. The thought of her finding out about y/n sent a chill down his spine. How could he explain that he needed someone else to discover parts of himself he didn't know existed? How could he justify his actions when he couldn't even understand them himself?
He sighed, running a hand through his hair. The stakes were higher than ever, and he was playing a dangerous game. The distance between him and Inej had once been a comfort, a way to keep his vulnerabilities hidden. Now, it was a barrier he desperately wanted to break down. But at what cost?
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imthesilentwriter · 2 months ago
Text
The Stars
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Harry Potter x Wolfstar!Daughter!Reader
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Summary: With a little help from the mistletoe, you and Harry share your first kiss under the stary night sky.
Warnings: first kiss, light teasing
Authors Note: I'm currently in the process of planning out a couple of oneshot ideas I've had in my head - so, as to prepare for the no time I will have over the next couple of weeks. These fics should be posted about a week or so apart, then I should be done with my final exams, and well... I'll be back. I hope you can understand, enjoy this fic!
Word Count: 2250
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Navigation | Masterlist
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You stand in the doorway to the boy’s dormitory, leaning against the frame as you watch Harry rummage through his trunk. The room is mostly empty, with only a few belongings left scattered about from students still ready to pack.
“Are you all set to go?” you ask, crossing your arms with a playful smirk, catching his attention.
Harry straightens up, turning to face you with that familiar messy hair of his falling over his glasses. “Almost,” he replies, his voice warm but a bit distracted as he shoves a book into his trunk. “Just making sure I didn’t forget anything.”
You raise an eyebrow, stepping into the room a bit more. “You’re not leaving behind any homework, are you? You did hand in that Potions assignment, right?” Your tone is teasing, but there’s a genuine question behind it. You’ve known Harry long enough to recognise that sometimes he forgets things when he’s too busy thinking about other stuff.
He grins, leaning casually against the trunk now. “Yes, Mum,” he teases back, the corner of his mouth quirking up as he crosses his arms in response. “Everything’s done. Handed in my Potions essay two days ago. Thought you’d be proud of me.”
You laugh softly, rolling your eyes but feeling a warmth in your chest as he steps closer. “I am proud. I’d hate for Snape to ruin your holiday with some snarky comment about missing work.”
Harry’s grin widens, his eyes sparkling as he takes another step toward you. “Don’t worry. I wouldn’t let anything ruin our holiday. Especially not Snape.”
You tilt your head at him, smiling, and there’s a moment of quiet tension between you. It’s the kind that has become increasingly familiar lately, and you can feel your heart speeding up just a little. His eyes linger on yours for a second longer than usual, before he shakes his head with a laugh.
“Anyway,” he says, breaking the moment, “we should head down for dinner before Ron eats everything.” He gives you a playful nudge as he moves past you toward the door.
You chuckle, following him out of the room. “Knowing Ron, we’re probably already too late.”
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You and Harry step into the Great Hall, the warm glow of the candles overhead flickering against the enchanted ceiling. You spot Ron and Hermione at the Gryffindor table, sitting close together with a half-empty platter of food in front of them.
As you approach, Ron looks up, his cheeks bulging with a mouthful of what appears to be roast chicken. He says something muffled, completely incomprehensible as bits of food fly onto his plate.
Hermione rolls her eyes, giving him a pointed look before turning to you at Harry. “He said, ‘It took you both long enough.’” She offers a small, knowing smile that makes your stomach flip. There’s a teasing glint in her eyes, as if she’s noticed how close you and Harry are walking together.
You feel your cheeks heat up, but you quickly sit down next to Harry, trying to act normal. “We didn’t take that long,” you reply, though your voice sounds more defensive than you intended.
Ron, now finally managing to swallow his food, grins. “Yeah, sure. You’re only the last ones here. Hermione thought you two got lost or something.” 
You scoff lightly, shooting him a playful glare. “We were just making sure Harry packed everything, unlike someone who nearly forgot their Charms homework last week.”
Ron shrugs, completely unbothered. “That was one time.”
Hermione looks exasperated but doesn’t press the point, instead glancing between you and Harry. “You two seem… close tonight,” she says, her voice casual but with a hint of teasing. “Sitting awfully close, aren’t you?”
Your heart skips a beat, and you realise that, yes, you and Harry are sitting closer than usual – your knees brushing under the table, shoulders almost touching. Harry shifts beside you, and when you glance at him, you notice the light pink tint spreading across his cheeks.
“Oh, uh-” Harry stammers, trying to play it off, “there’s just, you know, less space at the table tonight.” He sounds unconvincing, and you can feel your own face growing warmer.
Ron snickers, biting into a piece of bread. “Right. ‘Less space.’”
You kick Ron lightly under the table, earning a chuckle from him, while Hermione hides her grin behind her glass of pumpkin juice. Harry, still a bit flustered, reaches for a roll, but his hand brushes yours as you both go for it at the same time.
“Sorry,” he mutters, looking down at his plate quickly. You pull your hand back, feeling the butterflies in your stomach flutter more intensely.
Dinner goes on with light conversation, mostly centred around Ron’s enthusiastic retelling of his plans for Christmas and Hermione’s exasperation over his lack of preparation for the upcoming exams. All the while, you’re hyper-aware of how close Harry is, and how his arm occasionally grazes yours.
Once you’ve finished eating, the plates magically clear themselves, and Harry glances at you, an almost shy smile tugging at his lips. “We’ve got some time before bed… do you want to do something?” His voice is soft, hopeful.
You bite your lip, thinking for a moment, before the answer comes to you. “I’d like to go to the Astronomy Tower,” you say, your voice quiet but certain. “To look at the stars.”
His eyes light up, and he nods. “That sounds perfect.”
Ron lets out an exaggerated sigh. “Of course, the Astronomy Tower…”
Hermione gives him a look. “Oh, hush, Ron. Let them go look at the stars.” There’s a sly smile on her lips, and you have a feeling she knows exactly what’s going on between you and Harry, even if neither of you has fully admitted it yet.
Blushing, you get up from the table, feeling Harry’s eyes on you as he stands as well. You glance over at Hermione and Ron, who are both trying their hardest not to look too amused.
“Well, we’ll see you later,” Harry says awkwardly, shoving his hands into his pockets as he waits for you to join him.
You give Hermione a quick wave, and she winks back, as you and Harry head out of the Great Hall together, making your way toward the Astronomy Tower.
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The cold night air bites at your cheeks as you stand atop the Astronomy Tower with Harry, the sky above a sea of stars. They glitter against the black canvas, so clear and sharp that it feels like you could reach out and grab them. You pull your cloak tighter around you, sneaking a glance at Harry beside you. His breath forms soft clouds in the crisp winter air, his eyes trained on the sky, but you can tell he’s just as nervous as you are.
For a while, it’s quiet – almost awkward – as you both gaze up at the stars, your fingers brushing his for a split second before you quickly pull your hand away. The cold is a convenient excuse for the shiver that runs down your spine, but deep down, you know it’s not just the temperature making you feel this way.
Harry clears his throat, breaking the silence. “The stars are… really bright tonight.”
You nod, unsure what to say, your heart racing just being next to him. The space between you feels charged with something unsaid. “Yeah, they’re beautiful.”
Another stretch of silence follows, and you sense Harry shifting on his feet beside you, as though he’s gathering the courage to say something more. You’re at a loss for words, the nervous flutter in your chest making it hard to think straight.
Then, after a moment, Harry speaks again, his voice softer, almost hesitant. “You know… the stars, they kind of remind me of you.”
Your breath catches at his words, and you turn to look at him, your heart pounding in your ears. “Remind you of me?” you repeat, your voice barely above a whisper.
He glances down, shuffling his feet before meeting your gaze again. His green eyes are bright, reflecting the light of the stars above, and there’s something vulnerable in his expression, like he’s afraid of saying too much but wants too anyway.
“Yeah,” he continues, his cheeks flushing pink from more than just the cold. “They’re beautiful, obviously, but it’s more than that. They’re always there, constant, even when everything else feels uncertain. Like no matter what’s going on, you can always look up and find them.” His voice drops, a little shy as he adds, “You’re like that for me.”
His confession is so simple, but it makes your heart feel too big for your chest. You can’t tear your eyes away from him, and suddenly, the awkwardness disappears, replaced by a quiet tension that hums between you. There’s something in his gaze, something tender and full of hope, and you realize you’ve been waiting for this moment just as much as he has.
As you stand there, words hovering on the tip of your tongue, your eyes are drawn upward – and that’s when you see it. A sprig of mistletoe, its little white berries gleaming in the dim light, hanging just above your heads. It’s almost laughably convenient, but it’s there, and you know Harry’s seen it too.
Your eyes meet, and for a moment, you both just stand there, the realization hanging in the air. He glances at the mistletoe, then back at you, his breath coming out shaky, lips slightly parted as if he’s waiting for you to stop him. But you don’t.
Instead, slowly, carefully, Harry leans in, his movements tentative, giving you time to pull away if you want. But you find yourself drawn to him, your heart racing as you close the distance between you. Your eyes flutter shut, and then, finally, his lips meet yours.
The kiss is soft at first, tentative, like you’re both testing the waters, but it sends warmth flooding through you, chasing away the cold of the night. His lips are gentle, and the hand that’s been brushing against yours squeezes lightly, grounding you in the moment.
When you finally pull back, the world feels different, like everything has shifted into place. You open your eyes to find Harry staring at you with a soft, almost awestruck expression, his cheeks flushed and his breath shaky. You know you must look the same, a blush creeping across your skin despite the cold.
The silence between you is thick with emotions that have been building for longer than either of you realized. You’re both standing there, frozen in place, still processing what just happened.
Without thinking, your hand moves up, trembling slightly as you cup the back of his neck. His skin is warm beneath your touch, and you can feel him shiver – not from the cold this time, but from the same nervous anticipation that’s thrumming through you.
You pull him down toward you, closing the space between you once more, and kiss him again. This time, the kiss is more certain, a little bolder, your lips pressing against his with quiet intensity. Harry responds instantly, kissing you back with the same urgency.
But just as you’re getting lost in the moment, Harry pulls back, his breath shaky as he rests his forehead against yours, his fingers brushing lightly over your hand. For a second, neither of you moves, standing there with your foreheads pressed together, the stars twinkling above, the cold night air forgotten.
You let out a breathy laugh, something soft and uncontrollable that bubbles up before you can stop it. Harry pulls back slightly, his lips quirking into a curious smile.
“What’s so funny?” he asks, his voice quiet but warm.
You bite your lip, still smiling. “I don’t know… I guess it’s just – this. Us.” You pause, your heart racing as you search for the right words. “I’ve wanted this for so long... I didn’t think it would actually happen.”
Harry’s expression softens, his thumb brushing lightly against your cheek now. “Me too,” he admits, his voice barely above a whisper. “I didn’t know how to say it... but I’ve liked you for ages. I just... I didn’t want to mess things up between us.”
Your heart swells at his confession, and you realize just how long you’ve both been waiting, dancing around this moment. You take a deep breath, your voice trembling slightly as you speak. “I like you too, Harry. A lot. I’ve been so nervous around you lately, and I-”
Harry smiles softly, his forehead still resting against yours. “You don’t have to be nervous anymore. We’re okay. Better than okay.”
You smile back, the relief washing over you, a weight lifting off your shoulders. There’s nothing left to say; you both know now.
Without second-guessing yourself, you lean in again, capturing his lips in another kiss – this one slow and sweet, like a promise. His hands settle gently on your waist as he pulls you closer. The world fades away, and all you can feel is him – his warmth, his steady presence, the way everything just feels right in this moment.
When you finally break apart, the stars are still shining above you, but all you can think about is how bright everything feels now that the truth is out in the open. Harry looks at you with a soft smile, his hand lingering on your cheek as he whispers, “I think the stars were always meant to lead me to you.”
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chernabogs · 5 months ago
Note
Hello! I rise from my tumblr slumber to humbly ask if you’d be interested in writing for Malleus, based on the prompt ‘I didn’t feel like I’d step into another world, but like it’d stepped into me. I knew I was there and forgot I’d left anything behind.’ from the prompt list you’d reblogged? I am…sensing much Malleus related angst potential here.
Hehe yes... sort of angst, sort of spooky
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RUINS
Inc: Malleus, a fisherman, one ghost (maybe?) WC: 3.1k Warnings: Bleak LMAO. Drug use (smoking, alcohol, and tobacco thanks to the fisherman), ocean horror mention, supernatural horror mention. Summary: A boy looking for his mother visits the last place she was before her passing.
“It’ll be a few hours down the path just beyond the tree line. Impossible to miss if you ask me.” The man pauses to chew on his cigar, his dark gaze narrowing, before grabbing for his pint again. “Why’re you interested ‘n that place anyway? Right rotten, it is.” 
The Red Rabbit is a place renowned for information gathering and sharing—so long as you allow the bartender to continue pouring the mead. Malleus’ fingers reach up to brush along the hood of his travelling cloak as he pulls his own pint glass close. He’s used glamour to conceal most of his obvious features. If anyone saw the crown prince sitting in a dingy pub asking for directions, it would most certainly cause a stir. 
“Right rotten, is it?” Malleus raises the pint to his lips and allows the burning liquid to slide down his throat. Fae mead is noxious, only in that it can get you intoxicated in the first few sips—if you’re a human. The man who sits before Malleus has taken more than a few at this rate. “Perhaps it would be best to let me be the judge of that myself.”
His companion snorts before setting his cigar aside. He’s a fisherman; the scent of the ocean lingers on his person, and his hands are calloused from tossing and hauling nets into an ungiving depth. The shores of lands that had once been Briar Nations have been deprived of fish ever since they became isolated. The village’s landscapes, once vibrant, have now become jagged rocks and dead trees. The villagers are no different. “Go where y’want, see what y’wish. So long as yer not on the rob. That’ll get you killed.” 
This is another thing that Malleus has noticed regarding the village and its denizens—people mind their own business. This is uncommon for small villages, where most would be itching to get in everyone’s affairs, and only further emphasizes the economic faults of the borderlands. It unsettles him.
He didn’t come here on a whim. The thought of this journey had sat in his mind ever since he found out the origins of his birth, and the deception under which he was raised. Perhaps this is why when he slipped out of the palace through the servant’s entrance and into the forest late at night, he did not feel threatened by the burning gaze he felt on his back.
His grandmother owed him. This, she seemed to know, and so she let him go without protest. 
Still, the villagers final comment piques Malleus’ attention. “Get me killed, hm? And what could be there to kill me if it’s just a rotten, desolate place?” 
“Dire beasts’ nests are in there. Few of the guys have seen ‘em—big, hungry things lumbering past the stained-glass windows and down the corridors. Lots’ve people who try goin’ there end up goin’ missing instead because they underestimate how vicious a defensive mother can get.” The fisherman picks up his cigar again and chews on the end. “Anyone who’s lived here long enough knows.” 
Malleus’ nails tap against the pint before pushing it aside and setting a coin pouch on the table. The fisherman raises an eyebrow, his beady dark gaze darting from Malleus to the pouch in interest. There’s enough to pay for Malleus’ drink, the fisherman’s drink, and probably tide the man over for the wintertime as well. A saccharine smile pulls on Malleus’ lips—the part of him that isn’t shadowed by the hood he wears over his head. “Take me there yourself, and I’ll give you more.” 
The fisherman chews on his cigar, staring at Malleus as he does. A thoughtful look crosses his face before it ends in him shaking his head. “Fuckin’ rich ‘uns…” 
His grumbling doesn’t stop him from grabbing the pouch and opening it up. He drops a few madol on the table before shoving the rest of the pouch in his pocket and tossing his cigar aside. A foul, hacking sound comes from his lips before he spits on the floor—which Malleus tries politely not to make a face over—and grabs his raincoat. “Come off it, then. I’ll take it the ocean way. It’s a lot faster and safer than tryin’ ta move through the woods. Bad season for that.” 
“Bad season?” Malleus asks as he rises to his feet. The fisherman shuffles past the other patrons in the crowded space before shouldering the door open to step back in the bleak outdoors. He mutters under his breath as he digs around his pockets before pulling out a small container and popping something into his mouth. The pungent smell of chewing tobacco notifies Malleus quickly of what it is. 
“S’breeding season. Everything in those woods is all riled up and starving in their energy. You’d make a fine morsel for somethin’.” The fisherman glances back at him and grimaces. “Tall n’ scrawny.” 
Well, Malleus tries not to take too much offence to that as he follows the fisherman down the path towards the docks. In his transformed appearance, his physique did look different than usual—leaner, less ‘victim of countless years of training.’ 
“Tragic,” is all he sighs instead before adjusting his hood once more. 
_______________
There’s something humbling about sitting on a cramped boat next to a net full of dead fish that you don’t really realize until you experience it. For Malleus, who sits with his knees to his chest and his body leaning as far away from the net as possible, it’s an experience he doesn’t want to go through again. The fisherman seems utterly unbothered as he stands at the end of the boat, looking out at the murky waters beyond while still chewing on the same tobacco lump. The vessel putters slowly with its magic-powered engine into the night. 
“Gotta go at this pace in case we run into rocks below.” The fisherman shouts over his shoulder as he looks down to the waters again. “Or anythin’ else for that matter.” 
“Anything—” Malleus recoils as a slimy fish corpse brushes against his hand. His expression twists and he swats it away. “Eugh. Anything else?” 
“Merfolk, sea creatures, indiscernible entities. Y’know—no man’s land specialties.” The fisherman’s foot kicks against the engine as the boat is guided to swerve around a rock in question. “Merfolk especially have been comin’ up and around these parts. Which is strange, considerin’ they usually mind themselves down in the Coral Sea.” 
“Perhaps they are vacationing.” Malleus prompts. He knows this is a stupid idea as soon as the words leave his lips, and the fisherman’s bark of a laugh reassures him of such. No one is vacationing to these no man lands. 
The two of them fall back into silence as Malleus looks out to the sea. The lamp on their boat hardly cuts through the darkness that shrouds around them, churning and twisting like the waters they drift upon. He can see why stories of sailors going mad in the night are so prevalent in these parts. The world around them, which seems to hold no beginning or end in this moment, is a prime canvas for delusions. 
“Try not to look out too long. Focus on the lamp instead.” The fisherman’s voice draws him once more as the boat sails along a cliffside now. Black stones loom over them in a daunting stance. It’s the same stone that was used to create Black Scale Palace—carved from the body of Briar Nation itself, back when the body still had a lot to give and belonged to his family. He can see faintly where fae-made chips reside and where nature itself has taken course. “It’s a fool's role to try and see out there. You’ll start seein’ shit that isn’t.”  
Malleus sinks back down in the boat with a sigh. The fisherman is weathered enough to have done this for a long time now if his grey hair and sun-wrinkled skin had anything to say. If he can survive to this age, then it’s for a good reason. 
“How much longer?” He asks. The fisherman scratches his chin before stepping off the bow and sitting against the side of the boat. Fish corpses, a fisherman, and the void-like world around him—Malleus is beginning to doubt the journey’s worth. 
“Five minutes, give’r take. Best just get comfortable.” 
Comfort is impossible with the pungent scent around them, but Malleus pulls his cloak tighter regardless and looks back to the lamp. A few insects bump against the glass in a foolish bid to reach the light, and he busies himself by counting how many burn up in their efforts. 
_______________
When they finally arrive, he pays the fisherman enough madol to wait for him at the bottom of the cliffs before beginning the steep ascent up the hills. His mother had an apparent idea that building a palace near the edge of the nation’s lands was a brilliant one. Perhaps in the forgiving summer months the view of the ocean was tranquil and pleasing. Right now, it’s the most loathsome thing in his existence. 
Making it to the top of the cliff offers no reprieve, either. He’s greeted abruptly with an excess of thorns twisting and writhing their way across the earth. Brambles, starving for something, shudder and groan as he inches past them. The only reason they refuse to sink into his supple flesh is perhaps because they can smell the magic of their creator imbued within him. His mother apparently did have brilliant ideas—one of them being to give him a healthy dose of magic before her departure. 
“Gods,” he hisses as he burns away another bramble. The sudden light seems to make the patch shudder and retract with an angry sound. The movement enables Malleus to notice a different aspect of the palace that he neglected—the scent of diurnal fae magic. He can feel it clashing with his mothers in a power-struggle for control, the two essences entwining and biting like starving dogs. The diurnal fae likely wished to keep humans away—Malleus wagers his mother wished for the opposite. 
His lip curls in disgust as he makes his way down the stone path leading to the decrepit white structure beyond. The closer he gets, the more he begins to see the truth in the fisherman’s warnings. Stained glass windows are either blown out or breaking along the palace’s walls. The stones themselves are chipping and beginning to crumble, crushed under the weight of the thorns that still twist and move subtly. The musky scent of animals also begins to appear alongside the earlier magic. This is what draws him to a stop as he reaches the front door. 
It may have been heavily fortified once. Now, it looks as though one door was violently kicked in, lying broken on its hinges and giving just enough room for Malleus to wiggle inside. He nips his finger on a thorn, causing a curse to slip past his lips as he presses his wound to his tongue before his feet finally meet stone again. 
There’s no chuffing of dire beasts from within like the fisherman warned. There’s also no indication of any sort of haunting present, which Malleus has also heard rumours of. 
No. Upon entering Wild Rose Palace for the first time in his life, Malleus is greeted with silence—anticlimactic, and brutally honest. 
“... hm.” He shoves his hood off his head and waves a hand to dispel the transformation glamour he’s been wearing. Once that’s in order, he begins to move down the hall to his right, his eyes narrowing with intent swimming in their green depths. If the layout of this palace is the same as Black Scale, then the throne room is likely down this hall, past a few more turns, and then through another set of double doors—nestled right in the heart of the building. 
As he moves, he does begin to track similarities to his grandmother's home. It didn’t feel like he had stepped into another world—rather, that it had stepped into him. He knows he’s here and yet feels like he forgot he left to arrive. It’s unnerving. His fingers trace along the wall to his left as he passes by suits of armour, portraits either torn up or faded from age, and tapestries that display tales with which he isn’t familiar. His grandmother had tried hard to shield him from a lot of things. This apparently includes censoring literature that may have once existed. 
The brambles continue to part for him as he makes turn, after turn, after turn in the labyrinthian design that was formed in his mother’s mind. His breath hitches a few times in panic when he hears a sound from behind him in the hall, causing his pace to pick up, only to level out again when the sounds fade. It feels as though he’s been walking for eons when another set of doors finally appear. 
Carved of black oak and adorned with two dragons curled on their frame, he reckons that they can only lead to one place as his hands grasps the cold, metal knobs. With a jerking motion, he pulls them open to a cacophony of deafening shrieks, and steps inside. 
_______________
Glass. 
The sight of his body takes him aback for a second as his expression becomes almost comical. The wall behind the throne that sits at the end of the large room is glass, polished and untarnished despite nearly 400 years of neglect. His hands fall from the knobs as he slowly makes his way inside. There are stained glass windows lining the one wall while the other is white stone, which is decorated with brambles crawling to the rafters above. Malleus steps over them deftly, frowning as he does before coming to a stop in the middle of the room. Once he reaches this point, he pauses, before closing his eyes and trying to think. 
He wants to see if he can feel her. Even a slight lingering wisp of her presence would be enough to please him. He wants to know if he can experience what it’s like: a mother’s touch, a mother’s voice. His grandmother had tried hard to shield him from a lot of things, with maternal affection also being one—not that he can blame her. He used to, but experiencing loss first-hand had taught him that not everyone heals the same way. A few remain more fractured than others even in the years after. 
“Mother?” He tries the term on his tongue, tastes it, rolls it over to see what that’s like as well. It’s foreign. His mouth struggles to form it and his voice warbles as his eyes open and he grimaces. Sour and strange—that’s how it tastes. His feet drag him closer to the throne before he kneels upon it to peer at the glass wall. 
It looks like it was covered by fabric once. Scraps of violet remain pooled on the floor, which he passes a sparing glance at before looking up again. He feels like a child as he peers over the thrones edge to his curious reflection. He used to do this with his grandmother when he was little—play on her throne, try to get her attention for even a moment. He’s always been somewhat of a needy child. 
“Mother?” He prompts again. Maybe saying it twice will do something. Instead, the only thing he receives is his own voice echoing back as he looks over his shoulder to the darkened hallways beyond. 
Silence—anticlimactic, and brutally honest. 
His nails dig into the metal of the throne as he slumps down, temporarily dejected. It’s a stupid thing to get dejected over, he reasons to himself. It isn’t like he expected to hear what her voice sounded like anyway. All he has are a few nagging memories of it from his time within his egg. His head turns to the side to look in the glass again. His expression is less curious and more frustrated now as he stares into his own green eyes. 
And then, a flash. 
It’s so subtle that he might have missed it had he not been looking in the glass at the right moment. It makes him sit up straighter as his breath stutters to a pause. There’s nothing for another few seconds before another flash, and another. A few lost green fireflies seem to have found their way into the palace and are now floating by his head in interest. Malleus’ lips crack into a faint smile as his hand goes up to brush against one, which lights up bright before floating just out of reach. 
He can see them in the mirror. The fireflies, the stained glass, the tapestries, the shadow—
Shadow. 
He thinks for a moment—just one, foolish moment—that he can see standing behind him in that glass, something tall, with horns like his own and a flash of green that isn’t a firefly. Malleus twists around rapidly in the throne, his body tense and ready for conflict, only to look upon a room devoid of anything but him and the insects. The silence of all but his own breath is becoming oppressive, weighted, like he’s starting to no longer be welcomed in this place. He hears something low rumble from somewhere else within the palace as he waves a hand to conceal his appearance. 
He rises from the throne, shaken but not put off as he steps down to the stone floor once more. A thought crosses his mind that he can’t help but find amusement in—it’s utterly her. From the stories he’s heard through Lilia, and Baul, and even his grandmother on the odd night, it’s utterly her to give him a fright before vanishing into the ether once more. 
It thrills him. It vindicates him. 
“Thank you, mother.” There’s a dry bit of humour in his tone as he casts one last glance to the throne before turning away. 
Does he feel as though a part of himself is satisfied now? Does he feel whole? He isn’t sure. Perhaps the realization will come to him on the boat ride back to the bleak, miserable village he came from. Perhaps the realization will come to him in his bed, when he’s wrapped in sheets of black silk and staring at the stars beyond. Perhaps the realization will never come at all because it never existed to begin with. 
Anticlimactic, and brutally honest.
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wooahaeruby · 3 months ago
Text
Chapter 21: Stupid Games
Chapter Word Count: 4,950
TW
1) mentions of date-r*pe drugs 2) Cheating? not really but it's complicated 3) Language lmao people got some curse words 4) My sanity being gone.
Gonna be honest here, I dropped off the face of the earth and forgot to post
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“Mouse?” Hearing Sona’s voice when the bathroom door opened was such a relief. 
Without your phone (Seokmin took it for safekeeping), you were unsure how long you were sitting in the stall, collecting yourself. You had been replaying the entire confrontation and how it could have gone terribly wrong at any given moment. It took no time for the anxiety to go away but it took longer for the anger to simmer down. 
You told yourself you would have done worse if given the opportunity. Part of you wanted to grab the back of his head and slam it into the counter but that would have been too much. 
“I’m here.” 
You unlocked the stall and stepped out, meeting the firm but concerned face of Sona leaning against the sink counter. Crossing her arms, Sona gave you a once over and relaxed her shoulders. 
“Wanna talk about it?” 
“When I step out there, how bad am I going to hear it?” 
“Pretty bad, bosses are a teeny bit on edge.” 
“So I’m fucked?” 
“Oh, definitely.” She patted the counter beside her and you stepped over, checking yourself in the mirror. “Now spill before we go out there.” 
“Got in a guy's face for spiking someone’s drink. Basically told him that I’d hang him by his balls if he tried, might have let my anger get the best of me, then took his ID and gave it to the guys.” 
“Hm, think I could ask Archivist for the camera footage?” 
You snorted, finally breaking into a faint smile. “Only if you get it to me after.” 
“Deal, let’s get you out of here before half the team walks in here.” 
“Oh joy.” 
With one more check in the mirror, making sure your dress was pulled down comfortably, Sona led the way out of the bathroom. There was a second guard outside, walking behind the two of you towards the stair before Sona led you up and reality hit the moment their eyes landed on you. 
“For the record,” You put your hands up in defense, “I want to say that I handled my anger really well and that could have been a lot worse if I didn’t.” 
“Mouse, you threatened to hang him by his balls.” Mingyu and Seokmin didn’t look amused.
“To be fair! I was running on alcohol and anger.” You held up your hands to defend yourself.
“You choked a guy.” 
“And he deserved more.” 
“Enough.” Seungcheol finally spoke up, putting his hands up before pinching the bridge of his nose. “It’s handled. Let’s just take the fact that she stopped someone from getting drugged in Ruby and nothing serious happened.” 
That…dialed everyone back somewhat. Seokmin was on you in an instant, taking your hands and checking you over for any sign of injury. Joshua joined at his side, placing a hand on your back, letting himself run his eyes over you just as Seokmin did. 
“I’m fine.” You pulled your arms back, looking over their shoulders to Seungcheol then back to the two of them. “Don’t bullshit me when I asked this, does ‘it’s handled’ mean what I believe it does?” 
Both of the men before you shared a look, something you couldn’t read in their eyes. Joshua looked over his shoulder then back to you. 
“Yes.” 
You let your eyes flutter around the room, wracking your brain. There was something gratifying in knowing that he wouldn’t be on the streets anymore. 
“Good. I hope they make it hurt.” 
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“Can you stop side-eying me?” Mouse asked, sitting in the passenger seat of Seungcheol’s car – a black Rolls-Royce Ghost –  with Joshua sitting in the back. 
It was late, Mouse insisted on staying longer which he and Cheol agreed was fine but Sona was on her tail as she phased in and out of the crowd. 
“I dunno, Mouse, are you going to do something like that again but end up with someone hurting you?” The oldest sounded unimpressed and disappointed. 
Sighing, she sank down in the passenger seat, “You act like you’ve never acted out of instinct before.” 
She is doing it to herself at this point . Joshua told himself, running a hand through his hair. 
“I’m not saying I haven’t,” Cheol pushed his hair back, sighing. “But that was reckless, what if something happened and you got hurt? Shua, can you say something back there?” 
“He has a point, Mouse.” Finally speaking up, she sank more into the seat. He watched her head disappear behind the seat back. “Just because you have some basics of self defense training, you were too close, you purposely made yourself too close, and if he wasn’t the biggest wimp on the planet, it could have ended badly.” 
“I ran a hundred different scenarios in my head while in the bathroom, I realized it could have been bad.” There was sincerity behind her words, even some shame if he could place it. “But I knew I couldn’t let her take a drink from it.” 
“And you could have done it by just spilling it on the counter, not dumping it on the guy.” 
“Can one of you be on my side here?!” She threw her hands up, sitting straight and whipping her gaze between him and Seungcheol. “Yes, I did something stupid! But I saved someone from being drugged and probably much worse. Can you at least cut me some slack? Just because you two and Hannie don’t tell me what you deal with, Jihoon was honest and I know you guys don’t fuck with date-rape drugs.”
Seungcheol pulled over on the side of the road not far from the house, turning in his seat to face her. Joshua had seen the look in his eyes before, there was conflict on whether he wanted to be harsh or understanding. He had seen it when Seungcheol had scolded some of the other guys for reckless behavior over the years. More often than not he was understanding but there were times where he put his leadership before his friendship. 
Mouse’s hands were balled in fists on top of the middle console, nostrils flaring with every breath. “Do not give me that look, Seungcheol, you know just as much as I do that you can’t protect me from everything in this world. You made a choice on letting me know the lives you all maintain. Teach me to fight better, train me somehow if you want me to be able to hold my own even the smallest amount. But trust me when I say that I would rather go down with a fight than let someone innocent get hurt.” 
The second they got back to the house, Mouse marched into Jeonghan’s room and not so gently closed the door. 
“How do any of you deal with her?” Seungcheol said, disbelief huffed out in anger, heading into the kitchen and grabbing a glass, ice, and a dark whiskey bottle. “I’m serious, Joshua. She gets under my skin like no one ever has before.” 
Joshua followed behind him, leaning back against the cleaned counters. 
When he first met her he had asked himself something similar. She always had a comeback, some smartass remark, and at first he didn’t understand what Jeonghan saw in her in the beginning. Jeonghan once said she was broken like the rest of them but had a will stronger than steel and she wanted to keep moving forward. She managed to fit herself in near perfectly with the thirteen of them rather quickly, so he had some understanding of the feelings Seungcheol was going through. 
But…not that long ago, he understood what everyone saw. 
There was a spark in Mouse that he had seen when the group of them were younger, starting out. She had some…untamed issues – anger – a lot more than maybe Soonyoung had when he got angry. Joshua could see it in her eyes along with the anxiety the night of the Gala when Kihyun grabbed her. It was there alongside the weighing numbness the night Mingyu got shot. He saw it tonight when Mouse took the ID from the wallet and left to talk to Seungcheol. 
Yet he also saw this…childlike, happy to be there personality that masked insecurity and timid confidence. 
Spending time with her over the last few days showed him that she was more than the loud, somewhat reckless, and smartass person she liked to show off most days. Mouse liked really bad, old movies and rewatching shows from the nineties. She loved video games enough to go toe to toe with Wonwoo online and cheered with pure euphoria when she promptly won against the hacker. 
There was much more Joshua could think of but it left fluttering feelings in his stomach at the idea. It wasn’t just the…butterflies? But there was a knot of guilt knowing he was absolutely falling for her best friend’s girl. 
“Can you give her a chance? After all this time you have to have some trust in her, right?” Joshua asked and Seungcheol groaned in frustration as he poured himself a cup of whiskey. “I’m not taking full sides but if you didn’t trust her, you wouldn’t be letting her come here, letting her hang out as much, you could order Jeonghan to stay away from her, but you haven’t. She has done nothing to break our trust, she is dating Jeonghan, the guys love having someone else with us. She has done a lot to help when she didn’t have to.” 
Seungcheol took a long drink from his cup, staring down at the counter. “The problem is that I do trust her. I have that annoying protective feeling that I have with all of you but it’s worse for her since she doesn’t know how to protect herself well enough against the assholes we deal with.” 
“Then teach her. Get Minghao, Junhui, and even Chan to handle her. Sona would be willing to help and Mouse trusts her. Get her up to our standards – your standards, and have some faith.” 
Cheol took another sip, tapping his nails against the countertop, eyes darting around as he went over the details in his head. “Fine. Once Jeonghan gets back and things go back to normal I’ll start her out with Chan. This doesn’t mean I’m allowing her to join anything major SVT related. Just to let her handle things on her own if needed.” 
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“Promise you won’t be mad.” You called Jeonghan after texting him to see if he was awake. 
“ If this is about what happened at Ruby, Mingyu already told me.” 
“God damn it.” Fucking snitch…
“ Kinda impressed there, the videos are even better.” 
“Of course Wonwoo sent you the video.” 
“He sent it to all of us in a group chat.” 
“Can you uh…” You cleared your throat, “Can you forward that video to me?”
“Already on it.” Jeonghan laughed tiredly. “ Did Cheol and Shua give you hell?” 
You rolled your eyes, falling back onto his bed now that you removed your heels and jewelry. “Sometimes I feel like Cheol treats me like a child and not a grown woman.” 
“ Ah, you know that isn’t true. He probably scolded you because he cares. Mingyu said you asked Cheol to handle the guy once he left?” 
“I know what I was asking when I went to him. I don’t want the dickbag hurting anyone else.”  
“I expect nothing less out of my girl.”
Words rolled around on your tongue, staying silent before he hummed your nickname. 
“ What’s wrong, baby?” 
“I miss you, Hannie.” Finally letting the words that were weighing on you out, you sighed, curling up on your side. “And before you ask, I’m okay, everyone has been a great distraction, but I miss you, I miss our dates, I miss talking to you after work.” 
You could hear him laugh again, it brought a needed lightness in your chest. “ Just one more week then I’m all yours again. Just stick with Shua and Minnie. I’m sure they are a good way to fill the gap.” 
Over the course of an hour, you and Jeonghan spoke as you changed and cleaned up for the night. He gave vague information on what exactly he was working on in Japan. You fell asleep somewhere in the middle of some long explanation regarding Mochi making that Jeonghan was going on a tangent about. 
When morning came, Mingyu was skipping into the room, shaking you awake with a wide smile on his face. You tried to swat him away but he only flopped himself down over you until you were gasping for air and hitting him on his back. 
“Get off!” 
“Get up!” 
“I can’t breathe!” 
“Come have breakfast!” 
 “I will if you fuck off!” You slapped his back harder and he whined, pushing himself up and off of you, stretching his arms back behind him to try and rub the spot. Heaving a breath, you sat up, hugging a pillow close. 
“Joshua made pancakes!” Mingyu tossed your sweatshirt at you which you slid on and trudged yourself out of bed. “I made bacon, eggs, hash browns-” 
Shuffling after him, the mouthwatering smell hit you the moment you stepped foot into the hall with chatter filling your ears. 
“Oh good, I didn’t want to die if I had to wake her up.” Seokmin’s voice rang out from his spot beside Junhui at the counter, passing things along to some of the others to place on the table. 
“Haha, very funny.” You mocked him, shuffling towards the counter and poured yourself a near full cup of coffee. “I was up talking to Jeonghan last night.” 
“Ohh, talking to her boyfriend~” Seungkwan’s teasing had your eyes rolling back and an unimpressed sigh leaving you. 
Ignoring anything else that left his mouth, you took your normal seat at the table, one space over from Jeonghan’s, peering over to the pouty, puffy face of Seungcheol, thick hair sticking up in multiple directions and a steaming cup of coffee in front of him. His eyes were closed and his hands were shoved in the front pocket of his sweatshirt from what you could tell.
Scary leader, my ass. 
The seats filled with the guys, each in different stages of awareness. Wonwoo, for the first time in a long time, wasn’t on his phone, rather sitting with a far out expression with his glasses crookedly perched up on his nose. 
“Eat up, everything’s on the table.” Taking his seat beside Seungcheol, Joshua called down the table and instantly hands, forks, and chatter roared across the table. 
“Thanks for the food.” You hummed, reaching for different items, stacking a decent pile of food, and ate, smiling to yourself at the home cooked breakfast.
“Hey, Mouse?” Mingyu caught your eye across the table, food stuffed in his cheek as he spoke. “Why don’t you have a car?” 
“Oh- I never had a need for one.” Shrugging, you sipping your coffee. “I have my license but the city has decent public transport so I didn't think it was necessary. Plus I don’t have enough money to shell out every month to pay for one, they aren’t cheap.” 
“It’s expensive to live on your own.” As you continued, you felt a few sets of eyes on you, mainly from Joshua, Seungcheol, and Seokmin but you simply looked down at your plate. “I’m fine without one. I’ve managed thus far.” 
Mingyu looked ready to open his mouth and say something in response, but Seungkwan called out, asking for one of them to pass the syrup bottle at your end of the table and the idle conversation flowed once more. 
Wonwoo, you, and Jihoon made quick work in cleaning up when everyone was finished eating. There was a nagging thought in the back of your mind regarding the guy from last night and your request to Seungcheol. You peered at Wonwoo from the corner of your eye, shifting from foot to foot while your arms were elbow deep in cleaning the dishware not allowed in the dishwasher. 
Sliding up beside you, placing glass cups in the dishwasher, Wonwoo spoke quietly. “If you want to ask what happened to him, you can ask.”  
“If I ask, will you tell me the truth or will you say that you can’t tell me because of Cheol?” 
“Come down to Pandora once you’re done here.” 
Looking over your shoulder, Jihoon was wiping down the table and a majority of the group dispersed, some on the couch while others were fully missing from the living room. It was just the two of you near the sink. Sending him a nod, Wonwoo was off, having finished his part of the clean up, and disappeared down the hall. 
“Mouse!” Seokmin bounced into the kitchen, changed into some shorts and a muscle t-shirt as you dried your hands off. “Since we are heading back into the city later, do you want to get Pho for dinner?” 
“Hm? Yeah. That sounds fine.” 
“Do you want to do something? Soonyoung and I were going to go into the gym outback but if you want to do something-” 
“I’m going to head down to Pandora. Play some games with Wonwoo.” 
“Ah~ Alright, I’ll catch you around the time we are going to leave if I don’t see you.” 
Ruffling your hair, he was off, exiting out the back sliding doors as you made your way towards the ‘basement’ to meet with the hacker. At the bottom of the stairs, you stared at the handprint keypad, and raised your hand to knock, only for the door to open, Wonwoo staring at you. 
“We’ll need to put your handprint in the system.” He turned and left you to follow behind. 
The TV on the console wall was on and you scoffed at the game that was pulled up. 
“It Takes Two?” 
“Mingyu is bad at it and no one else has time to play.” He sat down and held out a controller for you to take, kicking his sock covered feet up on the coffee table. “Plus, you want to talk, this is what I want to do while talking.” 
Sitting beside him, mirroring the position he sat, you took the controller and got comfortable. As the game started, both of you sat quietly, taking in the opening cutscene you’ve seen before in playthrough videos. 
“Is he dead?” 
The question didn’t seem to phase Wonwoo as he started to mess with the controls. Both your eyes were locked on the screen, working in unspoken tandem to get through the game. 
“He is.” He hummed out the words. “We also found out who sold the drugs to him and it snowballed from there. Looked into the guy, no major priors with the police, dug into some socials and he is a creep that doesn’t take no well.”  
“And his dealer?” 
“Not dead, but we are keeping him to find his supplier.” 
“Good.” 
Nodding to yourself, the game continued before your eyes, more calm silence blanketing the room. It was nice, no expectations put on you, playing a video game that should need a decent bit of communication but you and Wonwoo worked well without it verbally. While the both of you weren’t exactly close, it was a rather brother-sister friendship that was built between you. 
He loved to annoy you, getting into your personal space to just be a nuisance was his personal favorite. He’d stand there, not touching you or saying anything but would purposely get in the way if you were doing something. Once you had asked him to go away and he made the childish remark that he wasn’t touching you so he was perfectly fine where he was. 
Your favorite contribution to the friendship was gloating when he lost to you in a game he was good at. He’d never admit that he hated it, mostly a silent competitive person, but he’d always find a way to win one way or another. Another contribution was having someone let you into Pandora and completely fucking with his computer, changing the wallpaper, the speed on his computer mouse to the absolute lowest, and a few times changing his computer language. It made you laugh every time you received a message from him, words laced with annoyance, telling you to stop.
“Is it too personal to ask why you joined SVT?” 
“It’s nothing compared to some people in the group.” 
“It’s still your story.” 
Wonwoo’s fingers stopped on the controller for a moment, mainly noticed by his character stopping on the screen. After another pause, he started back up. 
“It was mainly money. My mother passed away and my father needed to help our family. We were barely making ends meet since I have a brother. I went into college late because we didn’t have the funds. Started working with SVT for cash under the table some months before the first semester. Then things took off and I simply left school mid-semester. Didn’t need it at that point since I could find everything online. I took the time to teach myself more and here we are years later. I do send my family money so they won’t have to worry too much. They think I just work for the cover company.” 
“Were you ever scared of being in SVT?” 
“I think there will always be a part of me that has some fear, I can’t lie and say I haven’t had fear, but it is what I do with that fear that allows me to move forward or handle future situations. The life we have is always changing, always dangerous, but I think we’ve learned how to manage the fear we have and continue on.” 
It made sense. Wonwoo was always someone that handled things with a calm demeanor and a straight face. The only time you had seen him crack was when Mingyu got shot. He didn’t cry but he damn near could have if given the time. There was composure in him that you found fascinating. 
“Mouse?” He paused the game, turning his head to you and setting his controller in his lap. “Why do you spend your birthdays alone?” 
You huffed out a laugh, dropping your eyes down from the screen to your own controller. “I’m guessing you couldn’t find a lot of records on me once I turned eighteen?” 
“Only a police report with most info redacted and a name change.” 
“I’m not going to over complicate it all. My parents died, pretty bad OD, I found them but cops didn’t want to put out that one of their own was taking drugs in a report. My extended family didn’t want me so I bounced around in foster care, changed my name at eighteen. In those foster homes, I didn’t celebrate my birthday, so celebrating it brought back some bad memories from being kicked out from my last home. The state I was in gets rid of all their foster care files once the person ages out of the system.”
“So you isolate yourself every year?” 
“More or less.” You laughed again, it couldn’t be helped. Looking at him now, you sighed, a smile on your face. “I…don’t think I’ll be doing that next year though.” 
He raised a brow, tilting his head to the side. 
“I think I found a group of people to help me not hide from the pain anymore.” 
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Your stomach was in knots, guilt and nausea had been plaguing you all morning. 
For the last week, waiting on Jeonghan to come home, Joshua had been picking you up every single day after work, taking you for multiple dinners, a movie, clothes shopping , and he even helped you get a gift for Jeonghan’s birthday. Yesterday he had taken you to an amusement park that was holding an event for adults after hours!
The flirting had ramped up on his end, it was eating you alive. Jeonghan called and texted a lot and you couldn’t bring yourself to say anything. You knew Joshua’s flirting was intentional, he took you to some of your favorite restaurants, saying Jeonghan had told him. He took you to a movie you wanted to see because Seokmin told him. 
Your head was all messed up. 
You knew you didn’t want to break up with Jeonghan. You’ve missed him since he left, you missed the reassurance he gave when you were stressed, the way he’d take care of you and always filled you with wonder at something new or adventurous. He’d spoil you, which you didn’t need but he insisted. You found joy in returning the care, listening to him vent when something was bothering him, cooking some of his favorite meals for at home dates, and loving the never ending laughter flow between the two of you. 
With Joshua…Things were calm. He made you feel like you didn’t have a care in the world to give. There were unspoken words that let the two of you communicate if you wanted to stay in and watch shows at the penthouse or go out and go somewhere. Joshua listened to your ramble about different recipes you loved and offered to cook them with you. He wanted to know what your favorite desserts were, saying he might be making or getting it for you one of these days. He made you feel like you were enough when you weren’t putting on an act when you were exhausted.
Jeonghan and Joshua, both of them made you feel safe. Both of them were a comfort you’ve grown to love being around. 
You were more confused than ever.
But here you were now, in the passenger seat of the silver Charger with Joshua driving to the hangar the plane pulled into to pick up Jeonghan. It was late, his flight having pulled inside only a few minutes prior, and your leg was bouncing with the nerves that coursed through your veins. A glance beside you had Joshua in a similar state, biting at the skin around his nails, tapping his other hand quietly against the wheel. 
The second the car was put in park and you saw the door to the plane open, you were out the door. Multiple men were flitting around the hangar bay, taking bags to the appropriate cars. You walked in fast, a few of the men glanced at you but you only nodded, which they reciprocated, probably recognizing you, and you spotted Jeonghan easily. 
With his back to you, you could see Jeonghan was speaking to a man dressed in a black suit, two suitcases resting on either side of him. He had his hands shoved into his pockets, surprisingly dressed down in a sweater and sweatpants despite the business he told you he needed to attend right before leaving. 
With the amount of SVT men around, you called out to him using his call name. Jeonghan turned rather quickly to face you and you felt the world slow down. 
He looked tired, the dark circles under his eyes prominent, and the smile he gave you was enough to know that he was going to need a few days rest to recover from the constant go he was on. The moment his arms opened for a hug, you embraced him tightly, feeling the rumble of his laughter as he held you close. 
“Hello to you too, love.” Jeonghan took in a deep breath, resting his cheek against the top of your head. 
“I missed you.” The words were muffled by your face pressed into the fabric of his sweater, breathing in the smell of his cologne. “I missed you so much.” 
You could feel the rumble of his laughter again, only letting him go when he pushed you back slightly, feeling a kiss being placed on your forehead. He raised his eyes to look behind you and Jeonghan smiled, a spark flicking behind his dark eyes. 
“ Hades , always good to see you.” Playfulness was dancing in his tone. “Have you pampered my girl well?” 
Joshua coughed and cleared his throat, stumbling over his words. “Uh- yeah, yeah, totally. Um- Do you want to head back to the uh- Penthouse, get some rest?” 
There was a smirk spreading on his face that sent a chill down your spine. A part of you had a feeling Jeonghan knew of the situationship going on between you and Joshua. You tried to keep your breathing even as you grabbed one of his suitcases and helped him bring it towards the car. You insisted on sitting in the back, needing a moment to collect the racing thoughts that hammered your mind. 
Stepping into the penthouse didn’t ease any of the tension in your shoulders when you noticed Seokmin sitting on the touch, scrolling aimlessly through his phone. He perked up the moment the three of you entered and a gut feeling was telling you to retreat and hide in one of the rooms. 
Jeonghan was stretching his arms out, walking to the kitchen for a bottle of water once the front door closed, humming out a greeting to Seokmin who smiled wide and greeted him in return. The two were…peppy? It was giving you anxiety. You busied yourself with moving his suitcases out of the doorway and rested them near the hallway for easy access when wanting to go to bed. Joshua seemed in no rush to sit down on one of the couches.
When Jeonghan did sit down, placing himself directly beside Seokmin, both of their smiles dropped. 
Jeonghan looked at you then to Joshua, pinning you both with a harsh stare. 
“Sit down, we need to talk.”
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