#yes I did fuck up mikeys thingy

[kiturts]

BAKA BAKA BAKA!

im never doing clean smooth lineart ever again

[ju1cyfru1t]

rottmnt x reader || S/O who bites (out of love and affection obvi)

Rise! Donnie, Raph, Mikey, Leo x Reader (separately)

fluff? :D, gn reader, romantic (established relationship), BITING mmmm, mild swearing

Donnie

- the first time you bite him, he jumps and lets out a loud yelp, “ah! ow! what in the name of-“ then just stares at you in disbelief. absolutely incredulous. and has to take a while to process. why? why- HOW could you do this to him? after all he’s done for you?

- don’t play with him he HAS and WILL bite you back and NOT in a loving way

- he is ALWAYS on his guard

- you go in for a hug? you lean in to kiss him? you turn your head ever so slightly in his direction? his whole body tenses up. you’re giving this boy trust issues. he will physically, STILL GENTLY, push you away with his mechanical spider arm thingies…heaven forbid you bite those too….

- “Do. NOT. Bite me. Y/N.” “…”

- ^— “DO NOT. This is your last warning.”

- “Yes, Y/N. You’re very ferocious and vicious. Now STOP biting me.”

- “Sigh. That is NOT affection, Y/N.”

- “AH! Don’t bite me while I’m working, please…Don’t bite me ever!”

- “If you want to ‘show affection,’ you could just…I don’t know, hug me? or hold my hand? the biting is unnecessary.”

- NOT a fan of the biting at ALL

Raph

- The first time you bite him, “AHH!” he is confused. he does not understand. are you trying to attack him??? do you wanna throw hands??? what did he do to deserve that??? he does not want to throw hands with you

- he really does not see how biting is supposed to be showing your affection but whatever you say 😭

- his skin is pretty thick and rough. I mean you’d really have to sink your teeth in to hurt him so he just lets you. it actually lowkey tickles to him.

- “Careful. Ya don’t wanna bite my spikes.”

- it’s definitely not his favorite thing in the world but he doesn’t mind terribly if it really makes you happy and as long as it’s just you trying to show him love

- chooses to just take it as a sign that you want attention and/or some kind of affection

- would never bite you back tho

- however, I don’t suggest catching him off guard with a nibble cause he might start swingin 🤺 and would feel absolutely horrible abt it

Mikey

- the first time you bite him he’s offended. you’re gonna bite HIM? 🤨 yeah, ok buddy. he just squeaks in surprise and rubs where you bit him, looking at you like ‘😟’ before biting you back. he is taking it personally until you tell him you’re just showing affection cuz you love him soooooo much

- he’s perfectly ok with it then as long as you don’t bite him too hard

- LOVES to give and receive affection anyways so he makes it really easy to bite him when he’s clinging onto you all the time

- always giggles and squirms when you bite him

- returns your bites with kisses all over your face

Leo

- the fucking most dramatic ever

- the first time you bite him he acts like you just shot him

- “OWW!! OWIE! Ugh! Y/N! How COULD you?! BETRAYAL” while gripping where you bit his shoulder and whining like a toddler even though it did not hurt at all and you didn’t leave any sort of mark whatsoever.

- ^ drops the act completely when you tell him it was out of love

- now every time you do it he thinks you’re trying to flirt with him 🤞😔 and I mean I guess he’s sort of-ish right

- honestly he doesn’t really care but definitely teases you about it /ns

- “yeah? do I taste good, Y/N?” /ns!!

- “ow! ok, ok! not too hard!” while giggling

- “mhm…now kiss it better.” makes you kiss where you bit him every time.

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now I know I ain’t the only one who bites like that 🤨

[the-arteest]

I MADE A RISE AU

the silly tortles

so!! in this au Yoshi was a famous musician rather than a movie star!! he passed his love for music onto his children, and is much more appreciative of all forms of art than in canon.(though he still thinks music is the best and most legitimate cough cough)

close ups of the boys!

Donnie(any pronouns)

i'm so sorry for the low quality aurgkuetg but! Donnie plays the piano! he is still very into tech, but their stuff and look is based a bit more on a piano because that's what the famous Hamato Yoshi played! wow!! but she truly wishes to play the drums because autism(/j please don't harass me)!!

next boy!

Mikey(any pronouns)

Mikey plays the (heavily modified) flute! While they love the instrument, it's just not enough for him. She needs the big guns! the bari sax!! did i mention all of them are very into jazz??

next boy!

Leo(he/him)

he's such a creature

anyways, Leo plays the trumpet! yes he's totally the asshole trumpet stereotype and i love/hate him for it. he loves the trumpet, but the music doesn't hit him in the feels, give him the jazz vibes! ignore his vanilla design ayuktghatg

next boy!

Raph(he/she/just Raph[ael])

i love her so much he is my life

yes those are little eyelashes!! alligator snapping turtles have little eyelash thingies and i love them for it<3

Raph plays the tuba, but the trombone is where his heart lies, she live laugh loves trombones

more details!

Splinter, while being a bit more accepting of who they are and how they express themselves, is still a bit stubborn. he won't let them all switch instruments until they master the ones they have. unfortunately, they inherited his stubbornness and refuse to practice their instruments until they're allowed to play the ones they want to play. this is a terrible stand-off and the boys partially lose anyways

they eventually find some strange vibey instruments(similar to the ones they already have) in Draxum's lab and take them home to mess with, and they find out the instruments are mystical! THAT'S RIGHT BABEY THEY'RE FUCKING BARDS WOOHOOOOO

eventually they learn to harness the

magic

and can make their funky instruments on their own! (they can still technically make the stuff they do in canon but they don't know anything but basic self-defense and would die with a weapon in their hands)

also the funky doodles

hope you love them as much as i do!!

[sk3tch404]

Lmao np <33 I always enjoy drawing Yandere's as pathetic lil meow meows hehe (funfact: I actually drew Rory first but after I finished his lineart I was like, wait shit I don't have a full color reference- and then I hyperfocused on drawing jay instead lol)

Also, you 🤝 me: jayce + jack o' lanterns = stonks ✅ ✅ ✅

Also also, ngl if Darling were self-aware she'd def hate me, because I always try to speedrun the Bad ending first lmaooo

Also^3, every time I hear baggy pants, I can't help but remember the boys I went to school with a few years ago, who wore the most ugly, most a t r o c i o u s pairs of baggy pants I have ever seen 💀💀

For Reference: https://imgur.com/a/fZsHsF7

This is what I'm talking about^^ like pls,, just sTO P-

About the blue reference, the paragraph I meant was the one about how I only liked EJ so much because of his BLUE mask 😔 young me truly set the bar too low (maybe it's because of him that I'm attracted to most fictional mad scientists/doctors with no morals now, damn this bastard 😒)

Oh, and the OG mikey myers Movie is the 1978 one! ^^

And finally about the Christian Gang /hj (every holiday Yandere of yours has/used to have strong Christian influences but these three are still considered extra Christian to me so I'm just gonna start calling em that lolololol)

Gonna be honest, when you revealed that one of them was gonna be Christmas, I immediately headcanoned him as just some guy in Christmas elf costume- thank god that's not the case though (I say, even though I know damn well that I'm still gonna draw him in that costume the nanosecond you drop a ref for him, because he's a lil skrimblo who needs to get a reality check via me shitposting him into humility)

Also ofc the twins are ginger 😒🙄 /derogatory /j okay but fr, whenever I see a fictional ginger online I'm like ....Ed Sheeran??? 😱😱 (coughcoughchildecough)

-Ren'py anon

OKAY OKAY I'LL DROP A SMIDGE OF RORY SPRITES SO U CAN COLOR IT BBG

He only wears shades outside lol

HEHEHE YES JACK O'LANTERN STONKS GO UP IN THE BRAIN CELL ACTIVITY

Eh, I mean, its always fun to get the bad ending first though. Just to see then get all angry and violent 😍 good shit tbh

MC would def hate you, but I feel like it would take a bit to get the bad bad ending yk? I don't have the obvious, good/neutral/bad choices most of the time (although there are some choices that will obviously lead to negative consequences lol)

JAYCE ONLY WEARS THE ONES IN STYLE RN NOT THOSE LMAOOOO

Though they can look good if done right, those boys at school were definitely not doing it right 💀

Now I understand the blue reference! Ugh how did I MISS IT SO BAD 😭 gosh you were going crazy abt him and the color blueeeeee

I understand how that all kick started ur obsession with fucked up men. We are one in the same 😎

Hehehe thank you for the confirmation! I will be watching Myers stand there menacingly as I look up fics of him 😍

It's so funny that you call them the Christan gang, but it's not gonna have all the significant original values and whatnot. It's just a global holiday thingy that everybody does regardless of religious background (Though I'm glad you still see their origins and acknowledge their important purpose to many other people!)

GOD HELP WHY? I ONLY WATCHED LIKE 10 MINUTES IF THAT ELF MOVIE WHEN I WAS IN 6TH GRADE DURING LUNCH? WHY WERE THEY PLAYING IT DURING LUNCH YOU ASK? BC OF CHRISTMAS OR SMTH IDK, BUT IT WAS OKAY IG

It would be very funny to see him as an elf that works at the mall as a side 😇 He needs it anyway

Regarding the Twin's, THEY HATE IT WHEN PEOPLE MAKE GINGER JOKES, SO BAD. THE MINUTE SOMEONE SAYS ANYTHING ABT ED SHEERAN AROUND THEM, THEY EITHER ZIP OUT OF THERE OR FIGHT. NO IN BETWEEN.

Typical gingers 🙄 so sensitive dude

Childe is one of the only gingers I can tolerate. If these two didnt have a life and played Genshin, they would favor Childe so much.

[h0n3yj4y]

♡STFU♡

This was a request for someone but Tumblr deleted the draft that I had and it also deleted the persons request thingy so if u were the one that requested agedup Mike and Short reader hardcore smut PLS LEMME KNOW!! (i am very sad this happened, fuck u tumblr💔)

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Mean!Mike Wheeler x Short!fem reader

Nsfw- aged up Mike to 19 👍

Warnings: rough sex, degrading, slapping, choking, biting, p in v, pinning, porn w/ no plot, fluff at the end, height kink, a teeny bit of blood

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You and Mike always had nice, slow paced fuck sessions. All so nice and sweet, both of u peppering each other with kisses and hickeys and so on. But today? Oh today was far from slow and sweet.

Mike had both ur arms pinned above u in a tight stinging grip as he was pounding in and out of u. He was going so unbelievable fast, u didn't know how much more u could take of his huge cock if he kept going at this pace, u felt like he'd break u. You let him know he was going way too fast and hard but of course Mike didn't give two shits about how fast and hard he was abusing ur tight cunt. All he did was smirk and go harder.

You were a whining, whimpering and moaning mess, a bit too loud honestly and Mike, of course, had to take care of that. He took his free hand and wrapped it around ur neck with a firm tight grip as he leaned close to ur ear. "Listen up you lil bitch. You better shut the fuck up, if not, i ain't gonna stop abusing the shit out of ur dripping cunt." all you could do was nod, not being able to mutter out a single word as you're trying your hardest not to let out any loud noises and Mike knew this but yet he wanted a verbal response from u. "Hmm? What's that? C'mon now, use ur fucking words. I know u can." he said so in a mocking tone. You look away from Mike and try to mutter out "y-y-yes...Ma-aster" to which u succeeded, well, would've if it didn't come out as one loud moan.

Mike slaps ur right cheek making u whimper in pain, he then grabbes ur chin, lifting it up so u are looking at him straight in the eyes, not allowing u to move ur head. "Nuh uh uh, what did i say bout being loud princess? Guess I'll have to punish u for being a bad girl and not obeying one simple fucking rule. Ur such a dumb slut." He lets go of ur chin, leaning down to the crook of ur neck as he lightly traces his lips over ur sensitive spot making u shiver. Mike then bites down harshly on ur sensitive spot, a bit of blood trickles down as Mike bit really really hard, he then licks it off, making u moan and dig ur nails into his back. He starts to pick up his fast pace again, this time going harder than ever as he slammed into u.

U were very close to cumming as u felt a knot form at ur lower stomach "M-Mikey...i-im so c-close hngh~" - "M-me too, hold on a lil longer tho, dont u dare cum before me. u got that?" you nodded as Mike leaned away from u, towering over ur very small figure, u were always very short compared to Mike who was huge, and he loved this since he could pin you down with such ease and tower over u a lot which would make u submit and do anything he asked. Oh and not to mention that u have a huge height kink which made everything 100x way better, Mike also used that as an opportunity to tease you a lot which would make you all flustered and horny.

Mike then looked down at u with a devilish smirk as he kept going in and out of u at such an aggressive pace and force. "Fuck. U look so good under me baby. So small, weak and pathetic. All mine to use how i please, so pretty. Now cum for me." watching as u rolled ur eyes back and gripped tightly onto him, u both reach ur climaxes, letting out long moans and groans, breathing heavily as u both try to catch ur breathes.

Mike pulls out of u as his cum drips out of ur abused little cunt, he smiles, admiring what he did. He cups ur face and gives u a soft passionate kiss. "You did so good for me baby, so so good. Now try to rest, I'll get us both cleaned up. I love you" u smile softly at him "I love you too, Mike."

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A/N: Thank u sm for reading! If you didn't already know I do take requests! :D

I'll take any kind of request as long as it isn't anything gross or very weird like example, piss kink...

Also I do apologize if this isn't super hardcore smut like how the person requested, this is my first time doing anyting "very rough" and it's only my second fanfic but hopefully I'll get better over time and such! oh and i started writing this at 2am so, sorry if its short and poorly written, hopefully there arent any mistakes. (i proof read this twice but i sometimes miss lil things so idk) :(

Anywho, its 4am now, good night loves, hope u sleep v well. <3 💛🌻🌼

[camilieroart]

COLORCODED TMNT AU RANT (with no edits) PART 3

COLORCODED MASTERPOST

COLORCODED UNEDITED RANT 1

COLORCODED UNEDITED RANT 2

I'd recommend checking these out before reading this :)

Mikey has a shit ton of nicknames : Mikey, Mike, Mikey Mike (separate from the two first), Mikester, Painty, Sticker boi, Angel, Angelo Raph doesn't have much, just the occasional : Anger machine, Pointy, Phael, Pha. Meets is Meets, they did try one : Meaty. It did not stick. Leo is : General, Chief, Flake (snowflake that was shorten), Sensei (mocking), Boss, Braincell boy (when he's alone with mikey), Narnar, Nardo. Donnie is : Techy, Natello, Tel, Tello, Explosion man, Disaster boy, problem, Don, D April is : Neil, Champ, Winwin, Fluff. Casey doesn't have any yet, he's too recent, but they do throw some around from time to time : JJ, Deok-Su (not really a nickname jgirejger), Edgy Boy, Emo, Splits, Case. Splinter : Dad, Daddyo, Papa, Oto-san, Splinty (only from April), Mr. Splinter sir, Yoshi

So season 1 is all about the Kraang's menace, with a sideline of Shredder but not much, just enough to distract them a little from the Kraangs before they wipe out the city Now Season 1 also has to introduce the mutanimals, metalhead (maybe same episode ?), April gets a gun and a role in the team (could get coupled with a b plot), Karai becomes Shredder (over several episodes) and some daily life eps and fillers because MY GOD do I miss some good fillers in nowadays shows sometimes Like yes !!! I love plot !!! But please let me breathe a little S1 ep 1 would be the pilot, idk if 20 or 40 minutes long, probably in between these two, since it has to introduce : the turtle family, April, Casey, their relationships (should be done in tje first few minutes for april and turtle family), the kraang threat, and the entire "let's sneak out and beat down a random thief that will happen to be casey" While maybe setting up in tje background some of the future eps Like let's push as much foreshadowing in the first ep as possible so it ties back nicely to the rest of the show

2nd ep I would feel like should be about the turtles figuring out how to move around, maybe beat down some people and learn how to use their new environment while discovering the city. Could have a b plot of Casey actually formally meeting them. 3rd ep they discover the kraang menace during patrol, and instead of being all like "mmmh =-= what's going here... Sound sketchy znd weird let's learn as much as possible", freak out and retreat to the lair and just panic explains everything to Splinter, Casey and April. They don't believe them. #2012 mikey moment but with the whole team. The ep would go the turtles proving what they saw, Casey becoming part of the patrol team and Donnie getting his hands on some kraang tech (not much), setting up the soon to be metalhead ep 4th ep they investigate more what the fuck are the weird alien thingies doing. They infiltrate one of their base and find out absolutely nothing because none of the aliens speak english. So nothing is written in english. They do take a shit ton of pictures in hope to decipher it later. B plot, while team A is infiltrating the base, Team B is on lookout and they run into Baxter Stockman. That's when Buckle is born and also they find out what the hell the green thing was.

5th ep, in the background Donnie has just finished making Shelldon and presents him to the team. He doesn't mention it but we can see him making meets. It's a chill ep, just some family shenanigans with the pets. Casey meets Buckle. Raph and Leo want to try to make Shelldon a battle drone while Donnie and Mikey are very much against it. April and Splinter are looking for Ice cream kitty that disappeared and they're trying to hide it from mikey. 6th ep, the trio Donnie, Casey and April get some development, again a chill ep, smth like either everyone else got sick and they're looking for a cure or uhhh casey busted some of Metalhead's compunds and is trying to help Donnie get them back and April tags along, or donnie is missing pieces to continue Meets and Casey and April take him in the city to find some pieces... Smth along these 7th ep, Mikey is the one that finally figured out how to read the kraang's writing. I don't know how yet but he did. They find out about their obsession with imagination, and their plan to get it with the mutagene (which failed) and their brand new plan to directly extract it from people but whoops it kills them (work in progress). They're like "well wow that massively suck and it's on a huge scale how about we don't try doing this by ourselves" znd they try to warn the human authorities. Humans being humans, they don't believe them but now knows about their existence (which well they kinda did before because of rumors but now they know 100% (since in the colorcoded universe people knows actually mutants are a thing, and there are people that arz pro-mutants and people that are against mutants))

8th ep they play it low and stay in the lair instead of going on patrol, nice filler ep just fluffy family time, b plot we meet the mutanimals.

9th ep, Metalhead ep ! It's them !!! It's the boi (genderless) !!!! So Donnie presents them to his brothers, saying it's an IA blah blah blah, then they watch a movie where it's like "ooooooh evil IA they all realize humans sucks actually and kills them all" which makes them uncomfortable with Metalhead (who is not on), cue the "let's deactivate them" Meets yeeting thz fuck out to the mutanimals and the turtles meeting thz mutanimals and adopting meets

no actually when Leo lose his braincells, Meets is the second Leo guihgeru it's one of the thing about his brothers Donnie coded in the original program before the IA evolved

meets as soon as Leo is alone with Mikey : My time has come

i also want to slip in bonus shorts like 10 minutes long, of family shenanigans in the present and when they were young, including April and Casey as kids

like there's this part where you know how they aren't allowed to go too far in the lair ?

At some point when they were 10~11, they went anyway like "i ain't scared ):<" and then they kinda convinced themselves the place was haunted and never went back and when as teens casey asks about it they're like "bro no this place is haunted D:" i feel like it could be a fun ep ghioregheuri just 10 mins short, maybe an halloween special

Casey: "have you ever come back there since then?" Them: "lol no that place is scary af"

casey : "you. are fighting aliens like. every day" Them : "yeah but you don't get it this place is haunted"

it's it's a halloween special there would probably need to be a sort of threat, even if it's just their imagination, what did they think they saw? Fdhdf

i'm not sure yet but imagine it was just splinter messing with them to make sure they never go back he saw them preparing to sneak and go in and he followed them and scared them

it would be easy for a master ninja

maybe it could also JUST be them getting spooked it's easy to get spooked when you're 10, in a place dark you don't know a bit abandonned

THEY JUST GET REALLY SCARED AND DECIDE "AH HELL NAH"

i'm thinking April would be with them or go a bit after them (so like when they were young), going "yeah well I'm not scared >:)" but she'd be all alone in a dark place abandonned with rumors of it being haunted and Splinter wouldn't even intervene

but if casey had to go, first he'd be much older than they were, since they're 16, the others would still refuse to go, and Splinter would be like "welp i guess the secret is up now" but Casey would go in, alone with the lamp and come out like 10 minutes later screaming for his life because turns out the place is actually haunted

Meets, who's room is the closest to the not-allowed part : sweats intensifies

They're also a teen and they just learned this is in fact haunted and they are not one to dispute their brothers words "you say it's haunted ? that's factually impossible however every metal bones in my body trusts you and now i'm scared"

In the 10th ep, April finally learns about the Kraang's plan (which they kept from her), and HEAVILY insists to help them. They're hesitant about it but Leo straight up refuses, and she gets upset. Later during patrol with jis bros and Casey they talk about it and they're like "mate you should give her a chance, you gave Casey a chance and look at him now" and Leo is like ): but what if she gets hurt,,, she can't fight ! April (who had been following them without them noticing (which is already a proof she's skilled)) is like ):< well i'm gonna show him. They run into the Kraang and start a battle and April sees it as a chance to prove herself. She tries to sneak and grab one of the Kraang's gun but gets spotted and saved by Leo who gives her a VERY dirty look before finishing the battle. Once it's done he stomps over and they get into a yelling match (yey), until April convinces him to give her a real chance, using the skills she has (namely, a good shooter since when she was very little and her parents were still together, her mom wanted her to be able to fend for herself and she was given daily lesson for around 8 years. She only recently had to stop). She succeeds the test and Leo, still very not happy about it, "accepts" her in the team. After that we see his opinion improves about her position in the team during the episodes, as a background thing. She gets her own donnie made gun in the beginning of the next ep, too :)

Ep 11, chill ep, maybe a special for a holiday or smth, just a breather ajdcjzvd Ep 12, introduction of the Foot as a problem (until then there were some bits and pieces of Karai's and Saki's story here and there). The kids find Saki's corpse on patrol and recognizes him from Splinter's pictures and bring him back home. Yada yada grief, he gets a tomb, they realized something bad happened and investigate the Foot. Donnie and Raph are against distracting themselves from the KRAANG, but the other disagrees. Donnie and Raph don't go in the first place but then have tp rescue the others that got captured (and got a bunch of infos with it). They learn that the Foot went bad, and that there's a new leader the "Shredder". They learn they plan on dominating the city and invade bits by bits the world so the Foot rules over everything, as it should. Donnie and Raph acknowledges it's a problem and agrees to help as long as their main priority is the Kraangs (modifié) Ep 13, chill ep, Mikey centered with a b plot involving Meets introducing the turtle family to their sign language because they had grown tired of writing in a notebook.

when meets officially becomes part of the family, there's an awkward amount of time where he doesn't know what to say instead of "my sons" cue a lot of laughters from his kids when he calls them "my spawns" "my kins" "my beloveds" "my children" etc He ends up settling on "my turtles" Meets really hates being reminded THEY'RE a bot so even Splinter calls THEM Meets even tho he calls his other kids their full names

do you think Meets ever asks Donnie for upgrades ?

Well there is some moments where they do but usually they're content with what they have It's like, they ask when it's smth that will help them (silent flying thing to be discreet), not just going up to him like "eyyy upgrade my dude ?"

I feel like Mikey would try to get them to get more cool upgrades zgdvf, he'd be like "dude, you should ask Donnie for super fast rocket boosters, or an ice cream machine, heck yea, that'd be awesome!" xD

Oh he probably would XD Meets would just politely say no tho fhzvdjzcdh If Leo was the robot one, however, he'd probably end up with a shit ton of useless upgrades until donnie goes "okay that's enough"

Because Mikey and Leo together have 1 braincell

Mikey: "DONNIE! CAN YOU GIVE MEETS A GIANT ANIME SWORD?" Meets, signing: 'please no' Donnie: "what the fuck Mikey."

LMFAO I had forgotten this whole aroace mikey bit where he runs away from potential love interests

Mikey: "my handsomeness is both a blessing and a cruse"

"i'm handsome" UwU "you ARE handsome" fear

"i'm handsome but just for me. it is my handsome. don't touch"

absolutely LOVING how Joo-Hyun does the most BUCKWILD SHIT and then when asked how she just winks and goes "the power of magic" that is SO fucking funny to me Joo-Hyun : is loaded Joo-Hyun : has retrieved all contacts in a new phone without even knowing the people Joo-Hyun : "the power of magic ;)"

the power of hacking people's phones

the power of magic ? Yeah no i'm just really into illegal stuff why am i loaded ? i robbed a bank

Imagine she just has some random talents and says it's magic but also knows magic and you never know which one's which

i think i'm gonna make that canon actually. she's magic-y but she's also a criminal

"criminal" in the society's way i mean. she's super nice.

i could use that "criminal" thing to like criticize the rich and this kind of things. like she's didn't rob a bank, she robbed the super rich.

Casey: "damn, I have a wicked aunt :)"

casey the gun in the making

Donnie: "I will literally shoot you with this gun if you don't stop annoying me" April: "lol you wouldn't do that, you like me too much uvu" Donnie: "Don't fuckin test me"

Meets wardrobe : a bowtie

Mikey is soft/cute boy aesthetic, Raph is tough boy, Leo is slut aesthetic (he is not)/japanese inspired. These two are not in relation to eachothers, Donnie is techwear, Casey is Emo/Goth boy, April is Girl ™️

like don't put donnie in red but you can put any of the bois in green

omg they could literally be greenscreens

put them in front of a green screen they're invisible

Mikey: "GUYS LOOK I CAN MAKE MYSELF INVISIBLE ON CAMERA LMAO"

does Donnie have more than one pair of glasses?

yeah, but he usually wear the square one, he modified them the most heirohjtir like to zoom or so other things

lmaooo I imagine Mikey would sometimes take the gasses when Donnie's not using them and mess around with them he probably broke soem yea

Leo be like "I look better than you and I know it"

mikey be like : hehe fun clothes leo be like : haha i'm hotter than you

All the dresses are dresses Meets gave as a present for Christmas

meets looking at leo's casual ouftits "boi i know what i'm getting ya"

does Meets have money did they shoplift the dresses vhfbdh

meets has extensible arms they shoplift

Meets: happily giving the dresses everyone: "wait where did you get those"

bold of you to assume they don't all shoplift

maybe they would but imagine it was the first time Meets has ever stole anything and they're all like "wow, didn't think they had it in them to do that (impressed)"

baby’s first crime

Donnie would play Dnd if he could zvdge

oh absolutely sadly his family isn't interested

I NEED TO GIVE DONNIE AND LEO MATCHING TANAKO NO ICHI SHIRTS RGBUIEHBUE

They gave one to Mikey but he refuses to wear it

Mikey: "wow Meets, how did you find dresses that matches our aesthetics so perfectly?" Meets, who has gone through hundreds of different clothing stores to find them: [maaaaagic! :)]

Meets who hasn't been around for a while before gifting : :)

"oh so that's why you disappeared for so long"

Meets who broke the 4th wall to draw the dresses themself : :)

Meets who asked the writer to write them conveniently finding the perfect dresses despite it not being logical at all in canon: :)

(raph’s dress ) hot take : the dress looked like that at first, but meets added the embroideries (he learned from mikey)

most people look very "professional" in suits but I think they would very much not look professional efdjhbfd colorcoded Leo: "time to look SEXY AF"

(surprisingly they all turned out great)

i love it when like there's clothes in other languages that are like "wow super cool and neat" but actually the words are really stupid like water water sock grandma

i'm going to give mikey a shirt that's like really basic, just it says BUTT in giant letters in japanese

the boys at night going shoplifting and seeing this shirt : "LMFAO WHO'S GETTING IT"

Mikey: "I CALL DIBS ON THAT SHIRT"

Leo: "oh this is terrible I love it"

the boys everytime they come across a stupid japanese shirt : haha YES

the shirt wasn't orange it was like, idk red or something but Mikey wanted it so bad he recolored it to fit his color sceme dhdfbdf

Splinter : "you must learn to share Michelangelo" Mikey : "NEVER" dips the shirt in orange dye

Splinter, with a straight face: "Michelangelo, next time you find a butt shirt, you will have to give it to one of your brothers."

This is Donnie. Donnie has 2 hyper complicated futuristic ouftits in his wardrobe and the rest is normal. Be like Donnie.

do you think they'd try to go to a convention in cosplay disguises like the rise turtles efhdbfh

Leo and Donnie dragging Mikey to a Tanako no Ichi convention

Mikey, actually having fun at the convention but doesn't want to admit it: "this is terrible. I hate all of this. I should have stayed at home."

magical girls but it's the gender that's magical

sometimes i think about how conservative and traditional Yoshi used to be and then I look at his sons and i'm like "damn."

Raph: "s k u l l s h i r t >:)" Casey: "w i c k e d"

imagine Mikey asking people to put stickers on his shell because he can't to it himself zdgfvg Mikey: "HEY DONNIE! I got new stickers, can you put them on my shell :D?" Donnie: "AGAIN?? At how many stickers will you stop??" Mikey: "I will never stop."

Tanako no ichi

Mikey: "I still don't get this show. Why are they letting a bunch of kids save the world???" Leo: "Mikey, we've saved the world before." Mikey: "THAT'S DIFFERENT!"

Mikey: "we're ninjas, we can fight!" Donnie: "and they have magical powers, what's your point"

are you gonna make up any parallels/foreshadowing with the turtles' story like they did in the 2012 show ?

Yeah

Tanako no Ichi: has a world ending plot scenario Leo: "man, I sure hope that never happens here lmao" Donnie: "don't jinx us please"

and then it happens

imagine Casey's alter ego dies on screen (foreshadow his dad dies saving him) and they all turn to him and then collectively decide to stop watching for now

Casey: "Aw, that was my favorite character, how could they do that :'((??" Donnie: "I always thought they looked a lot like you, It's almost like this character was a reflection of you as a person and this was a sort of prophetic warning lmao" Casey: Casey: "How about we never watch this show again"

Donnie after Mikey asks if it's a reboot : "Well Mikey, since you asked so nicely, I will tell you that if presented as a reboot, it is not ! In fact, while keeping the same story and continuing the plot of the previous 12 seasons, they changed the designs that were very flawed and had numerous problems of cohesion. Take... uh butterfly girl. Her hair grew longer and thicker during the transformation sequence even tho none of the other characters had that ! Her Butterfly motif looked more like a ribbon and caused confusion, and a lot of people complained about "sexualized" design because of her bare legs but short skirt (even tho it was part of her character). There was also a story of plagiarism, that was debunked since then, but did participate in the redesign. Plus, the overall team cohesion was really bad, none of their ouftit even slightly mirorred eachothers. How did they fix it you ask ? Well, they gave to the team several similar points, especially with their motifs. Look at the 6 button middle, they all have it, with their motifs on the side ! There's a little mark on their cheeks, and-" Mikey : "put me out of my misery"

Mikey: "PLEASE NO MORE LORE"

Donnie : "Well actually that's not lore, it's just behind hte scenes informations that you asked for. However" pulls out a huge book Donnie : "If you want lore, Leo and I have been keeping track of everything and-"

Mikey: "NOOOOOOO-"

Donnie has buck teeth:)

sasuka exists purely so I can put merch on several turtles without messing up the colorcode. however I am sure i can figure out a proper reason for their colorcode XD

Absolute revelation : WHAT IF I colorcoded Sasuka WHITE with green accent so the betrayal of her mom being the villain mirrored the betrayal of Oroku Saki (colorcoded white with red accents) when Karai stabbed him

I feel like this show is looking too much like a show Mikey would actually like fdhdhbf needs to have a really nonsensical story efvdhbf

not if it doesn't make any sense i mean don't worry in 30 seasons you have time to fuck up

Mikey thinks the visuals are great ! The characters are great ! But what the fuck is going on tho it just annoys him more than makes him hate it he just likes a well-built story

Mikey: "aesthetically? cool. what the fuck is going on tho"

he can sits through an ep, but through a season ? too many incoherence and characters getting OOC, too many plot points gets lost and characters arc butchered it is a cool show ! that's why most of his family likes it. you just have to make abstraction of the huge storyline flaws

Leo: "if you ignore the entire plot, it's a good show" Mikey: "are you even hearing yourself right now"

in level of stupidness, it presented the Shopkeeper as Sasuka's mom in the end of season 12 (they already had the redesign then), but then in season 20 they said the Shopkeeper was actually Sasuka that travelled back in time to beat up her team for some stupid reason

and it's like "yeah ! cool ! CHOOSE 1 THO" Mikey's favourite show is an on-going action romance show with a really well constructed story called "On the Devil's shoulder" he keeps trying to make his family watch it but they find it boring to death

Donnie: "I have a list of all the canon events that happened in this show right here." he points at a journal the size of a dictionary, "and in here I have a list of more events that directly contradicts the events of this first list" he points at another journal that somehow looks bigger than the first one

it's bigger because they contradict the same plot point several time

SO in Colorcoded each season would be year, and the ending of season 1 would finish most of the short arcs started there, like April's dad learn that they are a danger magnet, and the Kraangs winning happens on the anniversary of when they first got out of the lair. Like a bittersweet reminder. So in the end of season 1, New York is definitely destroyed (renamed Old York), and a lot of people runs away. April's dad cut all relations with the turtles, and she's dragged away to Canada, while Casey and Hye-jin are being put in foster care in Philadelphia, waiting for their mom to take them back (she's all they have left... or is she ). The turtles and Splinter returns to Japan to the remaining Hamato Clan (the Foot clan and Shredder does the same), and everyone is severely traumatized.

yea but like, what does imagination give the Krang? why wouldn't they give up after such a huge disaster? Is it really that worth it? Do they have a way to know if someone humans/mutants have more imagination than others? (cause if that's the case, I'd imagine Mikey would be an easy target since he's is pretty creative)

cause like, imagination is just basically the ability to make a mental image of something you have or haven't seen/felt/experienced, do they really need that? how come the Utroms and Kraang don't have that actually? If by imagination you mean the ability to have be able to "see" things in your head (mind's eye), then well, some irl people don't have that, it's not that uncommon, but it's really not worth all this effort to get. If by imagination you mean creativity, (hehe, kinda like the Lego Movie plot) then "imagination" probably wouldn't be the right word what's your definition of imagination here, cause it's a bit confusing why the Kraang would want it dfhdfdf (and surprising that they don't already have it, depending on the definition)

I thought they didn't care about what happened to the humans? why would they want to stop them? Even with a few new human memories, would that change their morals?

Imagination is the ability to create things that aren't real nor possible in one's head. Imagination is an ability that only the humans possesses, and that was deemed interesting by the high-tech society of the Utroms to study. To study it they made a faction dedicated to it : the Kraangs. Over the course of their study they realized the potential of imagination for their specie (not to advance, they already can do that, but to create their own made-up stories, make themselves a culture much like the humans. They want that ability, to them it's like a superpower).

the things is that they don't get a few human memories, when they snatch the imagination they snatch the entirety of the human's memories, and feelings attached to them, essentially fusing the human with the Kraang. To the Kraang it's like they experienced all that the human experienced. If the human had a daughter, it was their daughter

so they have both their own memories and all the human's memories?

ya but like the human's memories is this super violent all of the sudden thing, it feels much more fresh and vibrant and important basically it gives them empathy

so like, in this, imagination is like a 'skill' you can give someone (like, one human's imagination = one Utrom/Krang being able to imagine) right? it's not like, a quantity or something

i mean "give" is a big word. They do kill the human in the process. It's an ability they steal. But yeah basically 1=1

so are some people's imagination better than some? I think that would make sense

i mean i guess it's an ability like anything else : if you train it it becomes stronger i guess children's imagination are better than adults in most cases

cause if so I'm pretty sure the Krang would probably try to find the best people to take imagination from like, they'd target artists and music composers, architects etc... (before they made the technodrome of course dfhdf, they wouldn't be picky anymore then since they'd just take it form the whole city)

mmh yeah true htey probably would i guess their research would be useful there oh myabe the way the turtles learn about the kraangs is because they capture mikey

i think they'd more likely have like a machine that pinpoints imagination like after years of research they probably made a scientific thingy that corresponds to imagination

does Splinter have pictures of them from when they were kids

I mean he has a shit ton of pictures of them at every age but most of them are extremely chaotics (nice non-chaotic non-blurry pictures are rare)

I think his favourite picture would be of when they were kids (not toddlers like 6/7) and Mikey had a "class" to teach his brothers to paint and it ended up as a paint fight and mikey would get really mad they didn't take it seriously and start crying and the picture would just be crying mikey and his brothers comforting him with poorly made paintings, the turtles and their surrouding covered in paint

very random question but do you think if colorcoded was ever made into a series/movie, would it be 2d or 3d animated?

i have already thought about it XDXD 2D all the way. I love 2D animation so much

I feel like 3d would be more adapted since the designs are pretty detailed but also 2d good,,,

i mean these designs were made with the thought that it would mostly be illustration based

if it had to be animated, the design would be simplified hgruihgeur

they probably have smoke bombs hgerhgire

Okay so you know how at the end of season 1 the turtles basically failed miserably to save NY ?

So i have yet to figure out season 2 but consider : they're being dragged in the mud and called out for it by [insert group of people here], and they're all traumatized and miserable Okay so what if at that point, Splinter never told them about his own failure as Yoshi Hamato And he finally tells them then

like they saw Splinter as an amazing flawless person and they get to see that he has failed too in the past,,

Okay so I keep thinking about it and WHAT IF During the entire NY catastrophe everyone got a good look at them/filmed them/took pictures so everyone knows about the 5 turtles that failed to save NY, and they get MASSIVE backlash from everywhere (internet, in the street, on the news... Meanwhile the governments are all pretending it's a hoax and mutants don't exists) So that doesn't help everyone's mental health, Splinter's story would help a bit but they'd still feel huge guilt from failing to save thz city. Then, amongst the hate, on internet a new # starts trending : #SavedByATurtle And it's like thousands of people saying that, yes, they failed to save the city, but if it weren't for the turtles they'd be dead. It starts on the internet and then it spreads (the news, books at some point), the idea that the turtles saved a SHIT TON of people. At some point a news channel does the math and announces they saved (at least) 3 million people with their different actions. Now yeah 3/19.5 is not ideal, but fuck that's 3 million people. (As time goes on the number keeps growing) Also at some point Steve vouches for them

Okay so I keep thinking about it but you know how in most of the TMNT it's always Leo/Raph relationship or arguing or whatever. I think in Colorcoded it'd be more Mikey/Raph.

Like I was thinking about several siblings interactions and I'm surprised that more often than not Mikey and Raph end up fighting For example, I was thinking of a Mikey/Donnie comic after the Leo/Raph one, where Donnie would feel like shit and Mikey would cheer him up before calling a brother meeting. Raph is bad at social interactions, even with his brothers he just has trouble figuring out what to say. So when Donnie is like "i'm worthless I know you'd give money for people to take me if you could". Raph answers with "If I were to sell you, don't worry, I'd sell Shelldon too so you won't be alone" Like he GENUINELY thinks it's the right thing to say there and he gets smacked by Mikey, anf they end up arguing

For another example, I was thinking after the Leo/Raph comic that maybe when Leo felt overwhelmed he'd give the lead to Raph (who doesn't want to lead, but will do so if it helps Leo, but only temporarily). So at some point he's leading and he accidentally put Donnie and Mikey in a lot of danger and when they return Mikey is furious and ask him "what the fuck were you thinking ?! You know Donnie and I's skills are lower than yours" "Yeah and ? Sounds like you need to train more often, not my problem." "It'll be your problem once you have our DEAD CORPSES ON YOUR HANDS" Then Leo would go "Mikey ! Stop !" Silence "You don't like how I do things ? Well what about you take the lead, Mikey ?" "I don't want to lead, I know my job I'm asking you to do yours !" "My job isn't to lead ! I'm not Leo !" Mikey looks at him up and down "Yeah I saw that." And then storms off

i'm genuinely surprised how much mikey's and raph's colorcoded character make them clash with eachothers like aight ngl did not expect that also Meets and Leo do argue a bit too. not as much as Mikey and Raph but they often have opposite views about what the team should do Donnie, who doesn't have enough self confidence to argue with anyone, stuck between 2 set of siblings arguing : )) :

Leo: "why can't everyone get along :,((("

donnie is just like "hh. hhhhh. time to stand there and wait awkwardly and hope it doesn't end up in bloodshed"

Aight so since i'm not sure i'll have time to draw it, I'm gonna lay out some Colorcoded comic plot I had in mind

So for Casey comic : Casey thanking Splinter for something (not shown) and he goes "Thank you Mister Splinter." "That's very polite Casey, but you can call me just Splinter." "Polite ? I'm not polite, Mister Splinter sir, polite is for the WEAK. I am super tough and strong and WHAT IS THAT" He proceeds to shriek and climb on top of Donnie "that's just Buckle Casey." "Buckle ????" "Yeah it's my little puppy pup. My good girl. Yes your are yessss you are" "HAVE YOU SEEN THAT JAW ??? AND WHERE ARE IT'S EYES ??? THIS IS A DEMON" "Casey may I know why out of everyone you decided to climb on me" "Obviously because you're taller" "Yeah, obviously mister tough strong guy"

Mikey/donnie comic : Mikey and Donnie are in mikey's workshop, and donnie is posing while Mikey is sketching a bunch of his head from different angle. "Yes I'm finally getting it !" "What's the point..." "Well I never capture you right in my family paintings you know ? It always bothered me but if I practice a lot, you'll finally look good !" "No, I mean what's the point of working this hard for me ? Just leave me out of the paintings..." "No can do D. It's a family picture not a family picture minus that one guy" "It's not like I'll be there for long..." Mikey pauses and looks up "What" "Come on Mikey. You all told me : you'd rather give money to get someone to take me than keep me here" "Donatello what are you talking about" "Earlier, when you guys were telling me how worthless I am. Clearly you don't want me around" "Donnie oh my god. We were joking. Did you really take it seriously ? We would never. None of us would. We love you so much, you're our baby brother. You're not worthless" "But I AM ! Everything I do is bad, I can never get anything right ! I'm always below average on everything. I'm a failure at everything. You guys are right." "That's not true ! You're an amazing scientist and healer ! You can do so many things" "No I can't ! The only reason I am healer is because I have common sense ! I'm no scientist I can't even weld something together without burning myself !"

Silence "I'll be right back don't move Don." Mikey runs to Raph's room and drags Leo and Raph back into his lab. "Donnie says he's worthless and that we want to sell him" Raph and leo in perfect harmony "what" "Because of the jokes we did earlier !" "Oh gosh Donnie I-I'm so sorry I didn't think you'd take it like that. You're amazing and we love you and we would never do that." Leo hugs Donnie znd keeps at least a hand on him until the end of the scene "Yeah, well don't worry Don, if we ever do sell you, we'll sell Shelldon with you so you're never alone" Raph gets smacked violently by Mikey while Leo goes "Raph ):< !" "HEY MIKEY ! What ??? What, what did I say wrong ??" Donnie looks devastated and about to have a breakdown "Raph apologize." "What, no ! And don't tell me what to do Michelangelo. I did nothing wrong" "Oh 'you did nothing wrong' ! What are you, stupid ?" Mikey and Raph start to argue in the back while Donnie shakes off Leo's hand and leave.

Later on, Donnie is captured by Baxter Stockman's mousers and he goes "To be captured that easily, this one must certainly be a burden to your team... Say, let's make a deal." Mikey, Raph and Leo are very on edge about to snap at any moment. "What deal" "Well, I'll take your friend there, and in exchange, I'll let you go and never bother you again. And you know what, I'll even throw in some money, what do you say, mh ? You are all quite the mutagene success and I've dreamed to dissect one of you. It's an excellent deal !" As he speaks we can see Donnie's face falling until he drops his head in defeat, like he knows they're going to say yes "What the fuck is wrong with you" "Yeah we're not selling our brother !" "You can take your stupid deal and shove it up where I think." They continue to berate Stockman (that looks very surprised), while Donnie is absolutely glowing in the back. After he's rescued he just leaps in and hugs his brothers tight with the biggest smile

Leo: cool leader Raph: angy fighter Mikey: artsy goofball Donnie: ANXIOUS GENIUS

Imagine Meets doing the windows shutting down sound zvgvdggf

they would just to annoy everyone fbhdf that would mean they can play any sound too imagine them blasting meme music or somthing when someone is being annoying

raph dropping his slice of pizza on hte wrong side Meets : "MMMH WHATCHA SAYYYY"

Raph: "Hey Meets can you stop playing music at random plea-" Meets: [NEVER GONNA GIVE YOU UP NEVER GONNA LET YOU DOWN NEVER GONNA-] Mikey: Falls on his face during training Meet: [BADUM TSSSS]

Donnie : "wait so doesn't that mean you could talk using like radio or something ?" Meets : Meets : "beep boop"

while it doesn't really make sense that they can play these on themselves, WHAT IF, Casey or april or donnie found a bluetooth speaker and meets can just lock in and play whatever they want and they use it to prank

also now i think i accidentally coded colorcoded raph as autistic without realizing it

like -doesn't like hugs unless he iniates it -games. games is his life and how he deals with his burst of anger (his interest i guess then) -sensory issues well now if I do intentionally code him autistic ima have to do some research hugirger

about raph's possible autism I've also made him like super awkward socially with everyone new he meets until he gets to know them even a little bit and also tend to avoid people and go to pets and such and like idk nhgirejhugeruj maybe that's also accidental autism code idk

I guess so gherieugr I also don't like loud noises i can't control like for example when you go tap tap tap against your plate to make smth fall off your spoon it's very bad noise, makes me flinch and cover my ear

Meets is the baby sibling and they're using it to their advantage

leo and raph have an on going fight about who is the oldest

leo says he is the oldest and raph says he is the oldest what does Splinter have to sat about that fdvhdf does he not say anything cause he likes the drama

"ohhhhh well I forgot whoops" yeah basically

casey and april are in the same class casey had to retake a year at some point

COLORCODED TMNT MASTERPOST

[wheelcr]

tell us tell us pls ^^ how did you and mike wheeler meet / get close w each other??

ty for the ask sweet nonie! this might be a super long story time / rant so please uhhh buckle up JSHSJJDNSJ

so basically, in my stranger things dr, me and mikey are actually ( kinda ) neighbors and have been since i moved to hawkins when i was like 6. we would see each other on the way to school sometimes or like i would catch him biking around in front of my house, but we never really interacted save for some awkward waving across the street / hall in school

until like 5 months later, when my mom just had to befriend the wheelers ( love her so so much, but her social butterfly - ness is not for me ) and invite them over for dinner. our families were chatting it up and everything, nancy was super nice to me and called me pretty which made me giggle and blush ( i was over the moon omg ) then my beloved mother who just can't keep her mouth shut was all like "my sweet rosie and michael are the same age aren't they? say, why don't the two of you go play in the living room? or upstairs?" or something along the lines of that yadda yadda basically she wanted us to hang out

now i didn't really find it as a big deal but like my only friend in hawkins at that point was dorothea from homeroom, who was a pretty, smart, proper princess. i had no idea how to interact with mike + the hangout was fucking terrible, one of my worst memories in my dr

first off, i tripped and fell down the stairs ( i was fine dw my ass just hurt ), mike then ended up stepping on one of the legos i left on the floor due to me not cleaning up cause i wasn't even expecting anyone to be up in my room that evening, us fighting over the television and the awkward small talk and him cringing at some of my tastes which i found super rude

but then after we had like this really small, brief, yet actually really sweet moment when we bonded over being complete losers. like how i only had one friend and felt like i didn't fit in anywhere and he comforted me and told me he could be my friend if i wanted and kaiauejfn i told him that "i'd think about it" but my lil 7 year old heart was doing flips istg so— that was an epic semi - first impression, and after that, i honestly had no idea where i stood with mike wheeler

that interaction was honestly it for a while. we went back to being strangers who had a soft n sweet lil moment in my bedroom. until one afternoon that finally solidified our 'bestfriendship' as he liked to call it

i spent overtime after class hours helping out with my favorite teacher, mrs miranda, chatting her up just to gain a few extra credits maybe ( yes, ik, slay me ) and i walked out to find mike was getting verbally assaulted and spat on and all that by fucking dickhead troy around the side of the school. i was thinking like 'i knew this mike guy was a fuckin loser but really? troy? that braindead kid from english— oh shit i have to help him don't i' so i did what any logical person would do and walked right up behind him, and grabbed a fistful of troy's hair!!

now, the funny thing is, i'm a few months younger than both of these guys yet, at 7 years old, still stood at around 4 inches taller, so he really couldn't do much to me if he tried. that being said, i yanked this guy's head back and yelled in his face something along the lines of "leave right fucking now", and although my voice cracked on the word 'now' it definitely still did the trick

anyways that's basically the story of how we became friends! the incident with troy earned me the nickname tiger, for the cool 'cool roar thingy' i did in the poor boy's face, which mike still calls me to this day. when i asked him one time during lunch break "why not something like a lion or whatever?" he shrugged and explained that tigers are cool— plus it just so happened that on that specific day, i was wearing my mismatched, tiger striped ribbons that i used to be obsessed with. the faint scar on my cheek also reminded him of a whisker, i guess, how he noticed that? i have no clue

[nefarious-virgo]

Sorry for spamming mcr content but it’s still so surreal to me that I saw them LIVE

Here’s some personal highlights:

Gerards outfit and face paint, great fashion choice

So many emos in one place like it was 2005 or smth

I had a great view of the stage and got a ton of good pictures and videos

The crowd singing / screaming together in general but especially during wttbp

Mikey fucking way tank

The entirety of Na Na Na but especially everyone doing jazz hands, “like tiny daggers up to heaven” everyone putting their hands up, AND IT STARTED RAINING THE EXACT MOMENT THEY SAID “and the sky opened up”

Everyone being super excited by the rainbow

Gerard pointing at me and the others at the accessibility platform thingy and I SWEAR HE LOOKED AT ME (I was in the front) (also everyone else turned to look at us and it was awkward but great)

“We all drink piss. Or we did we don’t anymore”

Mikey taking a photo for Instagram haha

BOY DIVISION

“Everybody say ooo” “OOO”

Ray Toro. Yes he is a highlight

I was able to get both the tramp stamp shirt and the boy zone shirt even though I had to queue for ages

Overall a great night saw many cool people but as always I’m too shy to talk to anyone haha. If you went to the concert as well and want to talk about it or about mcr in general hmu :D

[honoredbastard]

such pretty tears, baby boy ♡

“does this get you off?”          “MGH! y/n please-”     “ah ah ah-”   

✻ ˒ ໍ CHARACTERS ♡ bonten!mikey, bonten!rindou haitani and sadist gn!reader. all above the age of 20. they’re all timeskipped.

✻ ˒ ໍ CONTENT/KINKS ♡ NSFW, EDGING, TYING, OVERSTIMULATION, Y/N BEING A soft SADIST-(?) MASOCHISTS, BOTTOM, BOYS, GIVE NO REICIVE. drug/addiction mention(s). MENTIONS OF PET PLAY.

✻ ˒ ໍ A/N ♡ Y’ALL SADISTIC GN!READER HAS ME BY THE NECK-. i don’t know how to write rindou nor smut well FORGIVE ME GODS OF SMUT- it’s just a little drabble thingy ma jig that really couldn’t be kept in my drafts for too long- manga spoilers? draken will be next time? also toy/gear mentions.

::  ִֶָ MANJIRO “MIKEY” SANO 𓂅

sex with mikey was usually nice, lazy, and quiet. on other days he’d devour your body like a starving man, but in reality he was a little on the frustrated side. sexually. at times he’d be away for business purposes as he’d tell you and leave sanzu or rindou to be your bodyguard. as for rindou you appreciated his company, he didn’t talk to you much but the times you’d cook for him ( he loves your cooking, bad or not this man will devour it in full. so will ran, ran is just all smiles and eating. burnt food? doesn’t bother him. ) and/or just a small conversation was enough for you to smile. although sanzu was a different story, the top trusted bonten members and mikey all shared a loft, including you. so it didn’t take a lot of time to understand sanzu’s.... addiction.

it didn’t bother you much but whenever you came out of your shared room with mikey, he’d stare. just stare at you calmly, sword or gun in hand. sometimes he mistook you for his s/o, other times he was too high to think straight and was sprawled out on the couch. half of his body melting into the floor. you wondered how he could do that comfortably. 

but that didn’t matter anymore, mikey was arriving home soon and you snuck around to grab some things around the house. a rope (thank you high sanzu for complying and ordering one), a ball gag, a small paddle that shouldn’t hurt too much, and a blindfold. all things you ordered off the internet after studying in secret for weeks.

when you were alone, lonely, and sexually frustrated you stumbled across bdsm and kinks. of course mikey had kinks and interests that he’d expressed to you which you happily indulged in them. ( his spanks hurt, but they make mikey’s hips thrusting against you afterwards 10x better. ) at the time you just believed you were a maso with a bratty side and mikey had to many kinks to list that left you both in undying pleasure.

all until you were alone all over again, sanzu drunk and on whatever drug he smoked or popped this time. you were free to do as you want. a little on the dangerous side when your boredom stretched for hours on end when sanzu was sober enough to recognize your sneaking presence. at times he’d play along and sneak up behind you ( he’s too good at this when he has his sanity tbh ) and whisper in your ear “what are we hunting this time?” “OH FUCK!!” you’d scream and on reflex threw a fist at the man, who’s arms blocked his face and your fist. “sanzu!” you groaned, heart thumping against your chest like a race horse.

“i’m sorry.” you voice strained, scared that you fucked up this last time with sanzu and he was tired of it. “it’s fine, it’s fine. i’m the one who scared you. sooo... whatcha sneakin’ about for?” he grinned, leaning closer to your face. his eyes felt like he could see your lies before you’d come up with one, so you just told the truth.... parts of it at least. “i didn’t want to wake you and i got ordered stuff that i wanted to use online and i was gonna go get it!” 

sanzu’s face that was inches apart from yours leaned away, he smiled politely before trotting back to the couch. “all good, just wanted to make sure boss’ partner wasn’t meetin’ other gang members. y’know?” his body practically melted into the couch, eyes flicking between you and the t.v before getting comfortable. “you know i would never, sanzu!” you grinned, he shrugged, eyes already half-lidded. 

yup, he was about as stable as a dizzy ram for a few minutes there. you sighed and marched your way to outside where two small boxes were stacked above a bigger box. those were all toys- anal beads, a small paddle, dildos. you name it, you ordered it. you could already fantasize it- mikey under your touch, tied to a chair with every. single. part of him.... exposed. your body felt a shock through it, biting your lip to remain calm but it was hard for your ideas to settle.

you could already feel a knot building in your stomach that you had to get out badly. mikey would be a couple hours right? when you arrived to your shared space with mikey, you put the boxes in the closet and searched for something of his. something that smelled of him, that made you tingle in all the right places. you found a familiar black shirt so you took it, plopped onto the bed and held it in one hand while the other went to town on yourself. you began losing your mind from the pleasure as you started edging yourself - falling into a fantasy of your own.

mikey body was wearing ropes like clothes, you were staring him down with a smug smirk. eyes slow and attentive, it made mikey twitch when he watched. toes curled when you licked your lips, biting down on your cheek to stop you from devouring him right there. no no no, you had to have your fun. you inched closer to him, eyes never leaving his.

the man unable to speak was bontens number one, his life was right there for you to hold in your palms. you were aware of this, but you treated him like he was another civilian. he, of course, allowed you to. your hands brushed his untouched cock that was dripping with precum, “excited already?” you asked, licking the pent up contents.

mikey, who was gagged, nodded quickly before your warm tongue dragged itself from his base to his already flushed tip. playing with the slit for your own amusement while he tried to buck his hips to no avail. you were aware he’d try to get himself into your mouth, lure you into his trap where he has his way with you and not the other way around.

“ah-ah-ah.” you shook a finger at him, a teasing yet playful tone, your hand wrapped itself around his veiny shaft, slowly but surely raising the speed with each bite you placed on his pale thighs. he twitched and squirmed as he neared his release till you slowed down at the peak moment. you could hear his frustration through his muffled pants and whimpers. your fingers rubbed back and forth across his slit before placing a thumb there.

you looked up at mikey who’s cheeks were redder than a tomato, you kept looking while your mouth neared his inner thighs. you placed hickeys, ran a nail from the inside his hip down his thigh which made him squirm more. his skin flinched at the odd feeling, then you did it with his cock.

that sent him into an odd feeling of pleasure that made his toes curled, breath hitch, and eyes squeeze shut. raising yourself from the ground, you sat onto his lap with open legs for taunting him. “should i remove that ballgag? hmm?” you questioned, blowing into his ear before biting at the lobe. “so sanzu can hear your pleasure as i play with you to my heart content?” you licked behind his ear, his head jerked back slightly - free rain to kiss up and down his neck.

 “i’m not letting you cum till you cry for me.. slut.” you clicked in his ear, he shivered at your dominance over him. 

I’M GOING TO HELL FOR THIS ONE EVEN IF IT’S SHITTY LMFAO-

::  ִֶָ RINDOU HAITANI 𓂅

sex with rindou was about a mix of everything. it was like those ‘god making me’ tiktoks you’d stumble upon every-so often from your pure boredom. at times you were allowed to go to bonten meetings and overs you weren’t. ( rindou is keen on protecting you from the heavy shit he sees too often. especially if those meetings are fucked up. ) so when you weren’t either someone who was already informed like koko or ran which rindou trusted more than anyone to watch over you, to be your bodyguard. 

the problem was, rindou didn’t touch you in the places that craved being touched. your bottom half was aching to feel his hands again, to become red, fading into purple and blues. aching afterwards but getting the best aftercare, you were treated like royalty after you let rindou have his way with you. you even missed his breeding kink that would never end and left you in a shaking mess.

yet although all the offers and signals you threw at him, he brushed you off. now this was getting on your nerves. very much on your nerves. so you set up a plan: overstim and edge your boyfriend beyond compare. you’d give him the best aftercare for a price. you were going to have your way with him, of course you’ll ask for consent and walk him through what you’d do to him. but after that the power exchange was all yours.

you’d both mutually set up on a safe word and if either of you couldn’t speak properly you set up a safe signal. rindou was invested in bdsm and you too, became invested into it. which may have flipped your sadist switch. the idea was to tie rin up or to a chair. you had plenty of gear ( both pet and non pet play ) and way too many restraining gear. which excited you of all the things you could do.

although you knew one thing for sure. you were going to play with his cock till it ached and tears were burning into his cheeks while you tried your way at humiliating him. he’d done this to you many times, restrained you, made your nipples harder than him. it was everything.

when you peered out of your room you saw ran sitting at the dinner table concentrating at something. “should i pester him?” you questioned aloud in a hushed voice, “hm? oh is that you, y/n?” “yes?!” you felt like you got caught, your voice was high pitched and confused which made ran laugh. “at ease, come on over here.” following his orders like a dog, you stumbled your way over to ran awkwardly.

you stared at the cards in awe, “are you playing by yourself?” “actually yes i am! would you like to play with me?” “sure!” you sat time with a smile, yyou seemed focused but your mind was somewhere else. far far away from the ground, it all played out with rindou’s loud moans and occassional grunts as your hand slid down his length. eyes flicking to him than the thing you were working so well for - applying your mouth soon after. though rindou failed your plans for his edging, you still went to town as he filled your mouth, riding his orgasim while you kept going. the pleasure becoming painful but it felt oh-so.... good.

                thanks for reading! <3 it was horrible but fun to write 10/10.                 rindou’s part sucked everything that i had worked on was                 deleted and i’m still pissed so it’s not great, thank you!

[cae-liveblogging]

Tmnt 2003 S1 E2

D: "it may not look like much but this tin toy can chomp his way through steel and concrete like Michelangelo through a pizza."

-----

APRILLLLL!! :D WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING IN THE SEWERS??!?

-----

Donnie is literally so dramatic

-----

the intro is distinct but in that same right practically unrecognizable as a tmnt intro besides the fact that they yell "TURTLES" a lot

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thats a lot of TV's

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lol he put out a whole block out of power

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not D and M arguing over the name of the lair

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they're 15 aww

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Raph is so angy

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L: "lets not trash this place more than it already is." fr fr

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do NOT tell raph to take anything slow he will NOT DO IT

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YEEHAW

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Donatello literally invented the flying car huh

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Mikey has a dvd collection aww

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love to see that Baxter Stockman isn't a plain ass white guy like in 87

-----

it looks like a fucking FurReal Friend

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Donatello looks devastated at this news a la Penelope Scott Rät

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RAPH WHY DID YOU BREAK THE TV?!!?!??

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WHAP 'IM SPLINTER! GET 'IM WITH YOUR STICK

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April is no longer a reporter shes a lab assistant we love women in STEM 💙🧡💜❤️

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"several rats" dude thats like a dozen

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the mouser is goring the rat on live tv

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"you flatter me Miss O'Neil, I like that" shutthefuckupasshole

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he's acting sus but i love how thorough April is like she really loves her job we love women in STEM 💙🧡💜❤️

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SHE KNOWS GET INTO IT MISS O'NEIL

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love how splinter just disarmed raph and he stood there like a moron

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R: "why cant we go topside and show him a little mean and green?"

S: "because i fucking said so you little red bitch"

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🎶BUSTED🎶 how sibling of you

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"I do not tolerate failure >:("

"Thats why you'd make a lousy scientist >:("

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D: "hey guys, I got one working :D" you sure did bud look at it go

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"try not to work too late April you know i dont like to pay overtime" okay girlboss

-----

one question tho why is she wearing a crop top and baggy pants that just feels so weird yet so cool to me

-----

she discovers a secret lab, folks

-----

the mouser can climb walls the mouser can climb walls the mouser ca

-----

L: "you know what master splinter says, a ninja is always prepared."

M: "I thought that was the boy scouts"

-----

M: "Next time, lets leave the wall crawling to the dude in the blue and red tights"

L: "you read way too many comic books"

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D: "I shut down its jaw servos. It couldnt even chew through a stick of gum! :)"

the mouser: proceeds to chew through a pipe and also solid concrete

D: :(

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obligatory shot down someones throat while they scream

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M: "guys, you okay!?"

R: *spits water out* "peachy"

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A: "idc how bad the cities rodent problem is. this is serious overkill" you dont fucking say

-----

ope she activated a motion detector thingy shes fucked

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Stockman: my mouser will make me a very rich and powerful man."

A: "Arent you already a rich and powerful man?" yes but hes a dirty capitalist sellout

-----

he literally has a button for pulling people out the front window of that observatory window huh

-----

she lost her lab coat noooooooo

-----

raph sounds like a gremlin lol

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M: "whoah!rouhbouh-houdini!" (robo-houdini)

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why does mikey talk with a valley accent its so disctracting

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raph really is a maniac huh

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shes gonna attack the mousers with a fire extinguisher. shes gonna extinguish them. -----

nevermind she actually hit it

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RUN BITCH RUUUUNN!

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so THATS how she ended up in the sewers

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girliepop just runnnnn

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✨whoAh✨

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They still kick ass tho

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Donatello is just being a nerd in the middle of a fight dont mind him

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D: "These mousers are incredible! The servo-mechanics, the circuitry, the articulation! :D" he really is in heaven

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y'know what? its only a little off-putting that the turtles dont have pupils or irises

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april faints when meeting the turtles pt. 2 2003 edtlition

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M: "soooo, can i keep her?" ugh

[ray-jaykub]

h,,, how do you think the lads would react to the song WAP?

this is, in fact, a crack ask so feel free to just let your mind wander.

Thanks ive been stressing over another ask in my inbox so this is good xp

Leonardo:

•Michelangelo started playing the song while he was reading

•Overall thought it was a nice beat in the intro

•"Yeah, yeah you f**king with some wet ass pussy."

•Does a huge 180°

•oh my god why would mikey listen to that!

•"Mikey turn it off now!"

•The mom who doesn't let you listen to it at all

Raphael:

•Doesn't like main stream rap so he probably heard it playing on the radio by accident

•Like he was in the van with April and Vern, who turned up the song

•"I want you to touch little dangily thingy that swing in the back of my throat!"

•They put this stuff on the radio????

•Has no respect left for Vern

•The person who doesn't make you turn it but absolutely hates it and it's obvious

Donatello:

•It's one of the most viewed videos on youtube

•Of course he's gonna watch it! What if there's some secret in it

•Has no idea what WAP means but when he does figure it out it is not a surprise

•"I want you to park that big mac truck right in this little garage!"

•Fucking chokes on his coffee and it's everywhere

•"Did she just refer to his penis as a truck?!"

•The only thing he deletes off his history

Michelangelo:

•Only one who fucking loves the song

•Like does the viral dance to it and everything

•I think he has a cruch on Meghan thee stallion (like me)

•"gobble me swallow me, drip down the side of me!"

•"Yes mam"

•The kid who likes the song when he shouldn't

•Master Splinter is all like 'dishonour'

[itsdeaflorumlove]

MY ROTTMNT OC

I FINALLY FOUND A NEW IDEA FOR MY PRECIOUS PEARL.

And this gonna be long so grab thy popcorn bishes. And be warned it is a bit messy (even the position of the drawings are ;-;)

Still a small teetle,

(still an endangered specie-)

In this AU. Lou Jitsu or Master Splinter agreed to create powerful mutants with Baron Draxum, because that sheep is a manipulative fuck and Lou not thinking twice about it. So on their first experiment they only used Lou Jitsu's arm to mutate our precious little Pearl. But it went wrong, yes Pearl was mutated but her shell was developed in the mutation making it small and only covering half-ish of her back and on the front are actually human genes like I would say Uhh she developed a feminine part.... uh... for fuck sake, I swear, so she has boobs and a freaking shell behind her. How did she live? HUMAN DNA!-

It was heartbreaking to Lou, that the sheep motherfucker made it sure that she will survive..... eventually. So for straight four years they took care of Pearl like their own child (ahhhhjjkjshhsh- (With her calling Baron Father and Lou Dad)) along with Baron Draxum's henchmen Muninn and Huginn of course. And after perfecting the mutation, thus the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles were born. But when Lou Jitsu found out about Baron Draxum's true intention with the mutation, he saved the boys and burned the lab up. But Lou Jitsu wasn't able to save Pearl along with her brothers. Leaving a confused four year old in the arms (literally) of evil. Baron Draxum manipulated Pearl, telling her that Lou Jitsu and her brothers didn't survive the fire, to save her precious heart. But the dumb fuck (he ain't dumb ;^;) sheepman wants his warriors, he stills have Pearl and trained her to be the best warrior there ever was. Yes, the sweet naive girl..... is still sweet and naive but very dead-panned and serious in front of her foes. She never really had friends in the yokai world because of her 'father', but she always has Muninn and Huginn by her side when she needed it, and of course an action figure of her other 'dad'. She still misses her dad and her younger brothers. If she face off her brothers, she could defeat them easily. With Lou Jitsu's genes, moves and hard training given to this seventeen year old turtle from her father, of course she can, even Raph. To Baron she is too sweet for his taste but he developed a father-daughter relationship with her throughout the years of training her (and somehow keeping Pearl innocent) but if it wasn't for Muninn and Huginn the girl would be very much less emotional less. Pearl's mask is black (light so kind of like gray(?)/grey(¿) but not.), she requested it, she dedicated it to her 'deceased' dad and younger siblings. Let's go back to the whole no friends thingy. She doesn't have a friend in the yokai world because of her father right? Welp! There's more. She was bullied, because she wasn't a full yokai and because of how irritating she looks (a.k.a. looking like almost human on the body department *hoot hoot*), the other turtles (yokai and kids of course.). They tease her about her shell, not being fully developed. So she often sneaks out to the skirts of NEW YORK. And there she met... her first best friend (Yass finally a friend!!!). There she saved a ravenet from a couple of bad guys, she knew they didn't need her help but she was drawn by the way they fight. They fought the badies side to side with smirks and grins on their faces, with a fist bump at the end in front of piled VERY beat up badies. And that my friend is the story how Pearl met her best friend, Casey Jones.

(Since there is still no official Casey from ROTTMNT, I had to make my version of him in ROTTMNT ;-; and boi does he look weird???)

Yes Baron knows Casey. But the first meeting was awkward and quote and quote from Casey, it was terrifying. With Baron staring at Casey across the table with an intense glare, it made him sink on his chair. Casey is eighteen and he looks out for Pearl with all his heart. Baron and Casey, Protect the cinnamon bun squad. Casey is around Donnie's height so if you compare her with the turtles, she is still smoll. Now, Pearl meeting the turtles. The bois, of course usually they would run around the roofs of New York, but they saw a glimpse of a shadow that they followed it. Of the abandoned warehouse trope, they met there. They both sides thought (Pearl and her younger brothers) they were bad guys, so they fought.

(still need to look for a better looking reference for hooded ninjas.(drawing))

(*readies a box of tissues*)

Her weapon is a black gymnastic(?) ribbon, and when she whips it fast it turns into a sharp sword (MYSTIC WEAPON!). She defeated her brothers, semi-beat-up (but of course while Pearl was fighting her brothers, she was thinking twice on defeating them, the color of their masks are what her dad named her younger brothers). The three older ones were thrown away far across the rooms, while Mikey was kneeling hopelessly in front of Pearl. The older three were shouting at him to move away, as they limped (running) towards Mikey. The orange masked turtle crying as he looked up to the white eyed small turtle, raising her sword to end his life. Mikey smiled at her with a sweet grin saying, "Sorry dad that we failed you.". Now this caused Pearl to stop mid-air, the blade closed to Mikey's closed eyes.

((FLASHBACK))

"Sorry dad that I failed you." A little three year old turtle said as she looked at her two disappointed fathers. "You deal with her." Baron said as he walked back to his lab, leaving a sighing Lou and a crying Pearl. "You only fail if you stopped and never do it again." Lou said as he carried Pearl with his arms. "You see here." Lou said as he pointed to her younger brothers, still normal turtles. "Orange here doesn't give up, he doesn't give up on making everyone smile." Lou said as Pearl sniffed and she giggle slightly. "Yeah, he does always bring happiness to everyone, except father." Pearl giggled again as Lou wiped away her tears. "And that is why he is named Orange, since he is the source of joy in the family." "Lou could you stop calling Michelangelo Orange."

((END OF FLASHBACK))

Pearl dropped her sword, causing Mikey to open his eyes hindi shock and the older three stopped running. Mikey looked up to a crying Pearl as she removes her mask (mouth) and her hood with her saying, "Don't give up Orange, you are the source of the family's joy, my joy.". And with that Pearl hugged her youngest brother in joy and sorrow. The boys were stunned, speechless. "You have never failed to me." Pearl said as she hugged Mikey tightly, a soft smile adorning on her face, tears flowing down her cheeks. Slowly, Mikey hugged back with unknown tears falling down his face, he doesn't know why but he felt already emotionally attached to the small turtle. The older three brothers walked towards them again (still limping). They hugged the two turtles, feeling the same way Mikey is feeling. The four brothers confused on why are they emotionally attached to Pearl.

And we end there, *dabs tissues on my eyes*, the heck the feeeelllssss. And wow, this is the first they I went full on mode to an OC. And hecc yeah I am proud! Maybe part two will come along in the future.

[brightlotusmoon]

Another Fanfic Scene Thingie

I was gonna work on like a sequel to “Fire And Oxygen: Nothing Else Matters” in the Lifegiver series, and I was finally going to start the 2003 Mikey vs aliens story in the CFR Mind Games series, and then this ridiculously random piece for the Sunshine Child series popped up, so I’m putting it here for later. It’s kind of part one from Donnie’s perspective. Then I’ll do a two and three and four from Leo, Raph, and Mikey, and maybe Ghost Splinter. Because the Sunshine Child fics are supposed to follow Season 5 and I’m tired of waiting, so fuck that, and the Leo And Mikey With Ghost Splinter Spiritual Intuition Team will happen whether canon likes it or not. I entirely blame drunk Splinter, that was the second only good thing about “Tokka vs Earth” (shh, I have Feelings about that wreck of an episode cough Mikey Got Nearly Dissected cough augh ahem shutup). Hmm. Perhaps I’ll write a Ghost Rat Dad scene where he discusses the appropriate times to intoxicate for Spiritual Purposes, because now I see April and Mikey dragging Leo into woods near the farmhouse to eat pretty mushrooms and get spiritual. Damn it, headcanons. Slow down. Do you want nonsense fic? Because this is how you get nonsense fic. Gods, I love writing the B-Team and Donnie’s precious loving snark. Mikey may be my love but Donnie is my bro.

Bah. Anyway. Here be the first part of “He Is Quantum”. Also, the first person who assumes Mikey cannot possibly read that well is getting slapped upside the head by the crankiest Autistic with ADHD this side of the fandom. I need more dopamine boosters. Hello, caffeine.

 “He Is Quantum” (Part Three of The Sunshine Child series) Part One: Donatello

“Seriously Dee, you give me too little credit. Look how much I’ve learned.”

“And exploded. And gotten wrong. And messed up.”

“Okay, fine. The wasp antidote.”

“Rubbing mutagen on your face because you thought it said super cool.”

“Curing your brainlessness.”

“With pepperoni?”

“You said the nitrates made it good!”

“Yeah, but…but…”

Mikey grinned. Donnie’s grimace turned into a pout, and his folded arms tightened. Mikey’s own crossed arms loosened slightly and his head lifted. “Come on, Donnie. I remember things, I just need someone to help me figure it out. Look, you know I’m good at making stuff up, I just need help with the follow-through.”

Donatello sighed loudly, dropping his arms. “Fine. Fine. What do you want to do?”

Mikey smiled. “I wanna learn physics.”

Donnie paused and squinted at him. “Why?”

A freckled shoulder rose and fell. “We don’t get along. I wanna be friends.”

Like a record scratch, Donatello felt an odd twitch thrum up and down his limbs. A little voice in his head said that makes absolutely no sense at all, except it makes all the sense in the world.

He pointed at Mikey, then upward. “You…and physics?”

“Yes.”

Don studied his brother for a moment. Mikey was lightly rocking on his heels, mask tails like goldfish fins weaving back and forth, one finger tapping against the opposite arm; he was always moving, unless there was something to stop him, and--

“Okay,” he said. “Newton’s Laws Of Motion. Let’s start with those.”

Mikey raised an eye ridge. “What, no Shreddinger’s cat?”

“It’s pronounced Schro--” and Donnie stopped when he saw the wiseass grin on Mikey’s face. He couldn’t help but grin back. Little smartass brat. He really does know.

The next morning, right from his bedroom, Don walked smiling toward the lab, just as a bright green and orange blur shot out of it. Reflexively, Donnie grabbed his bo staff and stuck it in front of the whirlwind, which gracefully rose a foot in the air and landed right in front of him.

“Hi, Donnie!” Mikey said cheerfully. He was balanced on a single toe, his arms folded across his plastron, a hardcover book shielded in them. His mask tails stirred in his own breeze. His azure eyes were completely electric; Don swore he saw a glow. After yesterday’s lessons complete with some very strange shows from Mikey following Don’s tells, Donnie had decided to privately nickname his little brother “Newton’s Quantum Law” – some of the things he did never made sense and probably never would, and therefore were best left to the confounded musings of theoretical physicists and maybe caffeinated philosophers. Donnie suddenly appreciated the mental and spiritual flips Leo had been doing just to keep up with Mikey ever since that bizarre meditation session where they had both gone unconscious.

He really missed Master Splinter.

“Hi, Mikey,” he sighed, as cheerfully as he could before caffeine. “Did you take a book from my shelves?”

“Mmaaybe.” It was a recent-looking textbook, black and navy with squiggles of blue and white peeking between the spaces around Mikey’s arms and fingers.

“Is it the Brief History Of Time book?” Don had been hoping that could be bed time reading. Maybe Mikey wouldn’t have nightmares, just confusing dream trips through space.

“Hm? Oh, nah, I was looking through that last night. Then I got to the parts with black holes and thought spaghetti would be good for lunch tomorrow, which is today, and I distracted myself, and it’s still on your desk, but I’ll put it back on the shelf, promise!”

Don felt his mouth fall open. Wait. Sp-um…spaghettification? Did he…understand…wait, he already read some of it? What? I. What?

That record scratch tremble again.

“Aaanyway,” Mikey was rambling, “I saw this one on neurology and I figured that would be better to start with because, you know, my brain was always weird and now it’s even weirder what with the stuff Master Splinter said about my spirit intuition, you know, when I saw his ghost, and neurology is about why weird brains are weird, so I’ma make breakfast and read this baby! You want eggs and bacon? Onna pizza?”

Donatello didn’t even realize there was a problem until he heard a snapping sound and there were fingers right in front of his face.

“Leeeooo, I think I broke Dooonnn!”

“Mikey, what’s going on? It’s seven in the morning, Leo’s doing his dojo kata thing, you need to stop shouti—hey, what’s with Donnie?”

“I dunno, we were talking, and then he just…glazed over.”

Don blinked, finally. Mikey was in the process of snapping his fingers again, and Raph was gawping at him, head tilted, like a dog finding a frog in its water dish. Don realized he had been standing slightly slumped, hands loose and bo slack between his fingers, jaw hanging, eyes wide, for a good couple of seconds. That was actually a decent amount of time.

Shaking himself out of it, he straightened up and sent Raph the flattest look he could manage.

“Okay, enough of this, I need my coffee, okay?”

“Already made!” Mikey chirped.

He closed his eyes and took a very deep breath. “Okay. Thanks, Mikey. Have…have fun with the neurology textbook.”

“Tomorrow I’ll be back for biology.”

Raphael froze with an expression of deep concern. “Whaaat is going on?”

Donnie just waved him off. “I’m teaching Mikey science. Apparently he reads faster than I do.”

As he finally, finally disappeared into the lab and began to shut the door, he heard Raph yell “THIS IS THE WEIRDEST PRANK EVER.” And he just shook his head and smiled.

[spectrumscribe]

I hear static, I hear you.

An AU, set directly after The Power Inside Her. Canon divergence from the ending of the episode. AO3 link.

———————————————————-

Part Nine. (Master Post)

Raph curled his hands around the mug Leo had given him, the warmth of the ceramic seeping into his scales.

It didn’t do anything to ease the ice in his chest.

He made no move to drink the tea, instead focusing on not winding himself up again.

Getting angry wouldn’t help them. Blowing up wouldn’t help them. Doing anything at all to relieve the pent up emotions he had wouldn’t help them.

But.

She was right there, right there.

And he couldn’t do anything about it.

What exactly he’d do about it, he wasn’t sure. All he knew was that he wanted her gone.

They needed her though, even more obviously now.

Raph slid his eyes from his steaming cup, to the hunched figure sat as far opposite of him as she’d been able to manage.

April wasn’t looking up, and all Raph could see was the top of her head.

She looked a lot different without her hair. He wasn’t sure what to make of that.

Raph’s eyes drifted over to Leo, who’d finally finished handing out tea and sat down. Everyone was seated again, even if they’d all spread out from one another.

Raph saw that his father was holding a heat-bag to his hand still, the small microwavable beanbag being used to warm up his chilled limb. It was the one that had touched Donnie.

Raph hadn’t been able to even move when Donnie had appeared, and before he’d been able to shake off the shock, his brother had started screaming, and-

It got fuzzy from there. Painful, too.

“So… what now?” Leo asked, breaking the tense silence they’d all fallen into. “Any ideas? Sensei?”

“I… I do not know,” Splinter said in a hushed voice, eyes on his cradled hand. “We have done our part.”

‘Now its April’s turn’ was left unsaid, but heard anyways.

Raph tightened his grip around his mug.

He didn’t want to rely on April. Not after what she’d done.

According to his elder brother and father though… she might be the one chance they had of fixing things.

Raph turned his eyes onto April, who was finally looking up again. She looked pale and washed out, and what little was left of her bangs hung limp. Over all, with her thick hoodie and visible weight loss, she looked like a wreck. The redness of her eyes only enforced the image.

“We just gonna brush what happened under the rug?”

Raph blinked, and glanced away from April. Casey. He’d almost forgotten his friend was there, honestly. So much had just happened, and Casey had been unusually quiet...

Casey was scowling, and he set his now empty mug onto the floor, hunching over his knees and looking at them all. “That was some freaky stuff right there, you can’t tell me we ain’t gonna talk about it. What the hell even was that? It was totally out of character for Dee to pull somethin’ like that. He do that to any of you guys?”

Raph shook his head, noting that Leo, Mikey, and April did as well. “He just stood there when he visited me.”

“Same here,” Leo agreed, and an echo of the same from Mikey.

“He… he did speak with me, when I met him,” Splinter said, glancing up from his hand. “But the screaming… no, this was very different from my experience.”

“So we got one outlier here, and not a lot of reason why,” Raph summarized.

“It seems so,” Splinter said, nodding his head.

What was different about it? Easy. They were all together. Question was why that affected things.

“Any ideas, everyone?” Leo asked again, glancing around at them all. “I’m sort of stumped here why this time was different. I mean, I know it’s different because we’re all in one place this time, but why is it different?”

“We overwhelmed him,” April said quietly.

Those three words sent another rush of silence through them all, and Raph stared at April, along with everyone else gathered.

“We…” April’s eyes went distant, and she gripped her mug tighter. “Our combined presence messed up his control. That wasn’t really Donnie. Or it was, but also not?”

Something felt like it was stuck in Raph’s throat. He wasn’t sure what to say to that.

It wasn’t actually Donnie?

Splinter leaned forwards, turning his head towards April’s corner. “April, what do you mean by that?”

April blinked, and came back to the present. “Um… it’s a bit hard to explain. He’s… he’s scattered right now, and not quite all there. What we just met was… well… it was just pieces of him. Held together by his willpower. At the moment… he’s not much more than emotions and memories. Mostly emotions. Fear, anger, grief…”

April blinked again, and scrubbed at her eyes. She continued, “He uses his connection to us to strengthen those, so he can… think properly again? I think?” She shook her head, muttering, “To be himself. Be more of himself.”

“April? You’re not making any sense,” Leo said slowly, cautious of April’s scattered words.

April grimaced, and shook her head again. “I’m sorry. It’s a huge jumble right now. Basically, um… he- he used us to anchor himself here, and we overwhelmed him. Unbalanced him. He couldn’t keep everything under control, and we… I pushed him over the edge. And he lost it.”

“That doesn’t make any sense,” Raph said, frowning hard. The way April seemed so out of it, it was making him nervous. The last time she’d been out of it, head swimming with power…

It hadn’t gone well.

“How do you know all that?” Leo asked in a strained voice. “All he did was… all he did was scream. I didn’t hear anything even close to words.”

“I… I heard him. In my head. It was like…” April’s eyes went distant again, and a hand drifted up to her temple. She looked pained. “It was like he was saying everything he wanted to say, all at once. It was… it hurt. It hurt a lot. I couldn’t- I couldn’t think anymore, there was so much. It wasn’t even just thought, there were emotions and memories and just- everything. He tried to tell me everything and I couldn’t-” April bit off, hand shaking as she lowered it. “…I couldn’t take it. I had to make him stop. So I… I made him leave. Again.

“I’m sorry,” She whispered, lowering her head again. “I couldn’t handle it. I tried, but it… I just couldn’t. I’m so, so sorry.”

“I heard him too.”

Raph flicked his eyes over to Mikey, who’d spoken up for the first time. Mikey was curled on himself, knees to his chest. His mask was off, and Raph could see the dark circles that’d grown around his eyes the past weeks.

“I heard him too,” Mikey repeated, now that everyone was looking at him. “In my head. Sorta.”

Raph stared at his brother. He didn’t check, but he felt like everyone else was as well.

“…what did he say?” Raph asked, since no one else would speak.

“He’s… he’s in a lot of pain. That’s basically all I got,” Mikey replied, shrugging. “He didn’t give me anything else. April, he tell you anything about that? The pain?”

The way Mikey was looking at April… Raph hadn’t seen his brother look at someone like that before. It seemed still carefully masked, but… pointed. Sharp. He wasn’t saying it, but Raph could imagine the meaning behind Mikey’s choice of words.

The pain you caused him.

“Yes. Yes he did,” April replied softly, guilt in her voice. “It’s still happening to him right now. What Za-naron and- and I did. Basically… it’s pulling him apart still. I thought it’d k-killed him, but Donnie… Donnie said it just separated him. He’s not alive anymore, but he still is? I’m sorry. It’s… it’s a mess. I lost a huge chunk of the information when I forced him out.”

“How did he do that anyways?” Casey asked. He glanced between April and Mikey. “The- the connecting thingy? You’re a psychic and shit, April, but Mikey ain’t. Right?”

Mikey shrugged. “Dunno. Just happened without me sayin’ so.”

“It’s not because of Mikey specifically, it’s more… Donnie was the one reaching out, and Mikey was just compatible enough for it?” April explained, seeming a bit confused herself. “I heard everything, mostly, and Mikey only got the most powerful bit. It probably has to do with how Donnie’s keeping himself intact.”

“You mentioned he was anchoring himself here, through us,” Splinter said, and Raph heard a hint of life coming back into his voice. “How so is he doing this, and perhaps it relates to Michelangelo’s ‘hearing’ of him?”

April pursed her lips, and her shoulders slumped a bit. “He’s using us. Mostly his brothers. It’s like… since he’s close to nothing but emotions right now, he’s using ours to hold himself on this plane of existence. Memories too. It’s… it’s a little vampiric, honestly, but without anything being drained from the boys. It actually drains Donnie, instead.”

Well that wasn’t unsettling as fuck or anything.

“That’s part of why he overloaded, actually,” April continued. “Too much emotion, not enough power to stabilize it. He was more himself than he’d had each of individually to connect with, but he… just didn’t have enough energy to process everything. Not enough ambient energy versus too much ambient emotion.”

That was even more unsettling. Great. Raph rubbed his temples, and then stopped because April was too. “Can we please back track to the whole ‘Mikey is compatible’ thing? Little more explanation would be nice. Mikey?”

“Man, I don’t know,” Mikey said, scratching the back of his head. “I mean- I just listened to him? Was listening to him? Something like that.”

Force of habit, or maybe just grasping for something normal in all this crazy, made Raph blurt- “You never listen to anyone, though.” -without much thought.

Immediately, he regretted it.

Mikey’s face closed off, and his confused frown slid into something harsher. “I listen when people actually tell me stuff.”

His pointed look at their father and older brother wasn’t missed, and Raph saw Leo wince.

“Mikey, we’re sorry, but…” Leo’s expression wavered between apology and something like his leader face, the one that gave orders and didn’t have time for dissension. “We weren’t sure if you two would listen long enough for us to explain, or even understand what we were aiming for. We didn’t know how you’d react.”

Raph bristled, hands gripping into fists, but before he could snap something hurt and angry-

-Mikey beat him to it.

“That doesn’t- that doesn’t mean you just cut us out of the loop!” Mikey exclaimed. Uncharacteristic anger slipped into his expression, even more obvious with Mikey’s bare face. “We have just as much right to know what you’re planning to do, this is our home too!”

“We didn’t have much time, and- and I wasn’t even sure how to explain it to you-”

“You could’ve at least tried!”

“You never listen anyways-”

“I listen! I’m always listening! You just never explain things how I can understand them-”

“We didn’t have time. Donnie could have reappeared before we figured out how to tell you-”

“That is enough,” Splinter interjected. “What’s done is done, and we will learn from our mistakes.”

Mikey looked rapidly between their father and brother, rising indignation and hurt clear in his eyes. “You- you’re just going to move on? No! No!! That’s not- that’s not fair!”

“We need to move forwards with the conversation, my son-”

“You didn’t even say sorry properly!”

“Mikey, seriously, I know you’re upset but I already told you-”

“Donnie would’ve at least tried!”

Mikey’s furious words sent a shock of silence through everyone, and even Raph’s own anger was quieted.

Mikey stared at them all, more pointedly at their family’s leaders. He blinked rapidly, and his expression twisted further into a glare. “He would’ve at least tried to tell us what was going on! Even if I didn’t get it half the time, at least he actually tried. You guys didn’t even bother!”

A long beat of silence, stifling with tension.

Eventually, a soft “Dude…” from Casey broke the spell of quiet, and Mikey’s glare slipped away.

“I’m sorry,” He said, voice tight. “I’m sorry, but you just- you guys always do this, and I’m tired of it and- it’s not fair. He’s my brother too, okay? Don’t just… cut me out like that.”

Mikey’s gaze dropped from them all, and he lowered his head onto his knees.

Raph’s stun wore off, and he felt awful. How long had Mikey been bottling that up? All that frustration and anger? Shit. And Raph hadn’t even noticed.

None of them checked up on one another anymore. Not since…

They weren’t right without Donnie. Everything fell out of whack without him around. Including their ability to give a shit about each other’s emotional stability, it seemed.

Shit.

“Michelangelo… I am sorry,” Splinter said remorsefully. Mikey’s shoulders hunched a bit more around his knees in response, and Splinter let out a quiet sigh. “We did not mean to hurt you, or Raphael. It was a grave error in our judgement.”

Story of their lives it looked like. Errors in judgement everywhere. Raph started this particular mess, he wasn’t excluded from that.

Mikey didn’t answer Splinter, other than a shrug of his shoulders.

Raph took a turn, since his comment had started the whole fight. “Mike, I’m sorry for what I said. I was just… I don’t know, kidding around. It was a reflex. I didn’t mean to hurt your feelings.”

Mikey lifted his head enough to glance at Raph, and then looked away again. Well, guess that was as close to an acceptance of apology they were going to get right now.

Leo was the one who started moving them past the awkward post-fight tension. “Let’s go around and compare experiences, maybe we can figure out why Mikey’s connection has been so much stronger?”

Solid enough plan. Not exactly productive, but it was something. They were flying mostly aimless right now anyways.

It was the same general experience, all around their loose circle. Everyone had felt like someone was watching them, or following them or something like that, and then came the fear and the choking presence and the overall feeling of terror…

Leo and Casey both confessed that their experiences had been more than a little scary. Kind of dangerous feeling too. Raph could relate, what with the exploding video consoles all around him during his turn.

The evidence in the dojo spoke for itself how Splinter’s visit had gone, and April explained that she’d ended up collapsing during hers, even just for a moment.

Other than Donnie speaking to April and Splinter, sort of at least, the experiences all matched up on multiple levels. Donnie appearing, acting like a typical horror movie character, and then vanishing again. All of them were like that, except-

“I didn’t feel any of that,” Mikey said, when they’d gone full circle and come back to him. He seemed mostly recovered from… whatever you’d call their fight. He was mostly back to his usual self, or maybe was just good enough to pretend he was. “Like, this last one? Sure, but that’s ‘cause we were all together, right? First time it was just… him standing there. Didn’t even look at me. I dunno what you all did, but I barely even got the heebie-jeebies from my visit.”

Leo furrowed his brow, tapping one finger on his knee pad while he thought. “Maybe that’s because he just wasn’t strong enough yet? That was a while ago, and he’s gotten a lot more powerful since then. That still doesn’t explain why Mikey could hear him though-”

“Wait,” April interrupted, holding up her hand at Leo. “Wait, let me hear Mikey describe his experience again. Mikey, if you wouldn’t mind..?”

“Uh, sure? It was just me in the lab, and I was starting to clean up some stuff, when I thought I felt somethin’ off and turned around to check it out, and then Donnie was suddenly there and I ran right towards him-”

“You didn’t hesitate? At all?” April questioned, interrupting again.

Mikey blinked. “No? I mean, it was a big shock, but I didn’t think much on it. Just kind of went with it, ‘cause you know… don’t look a gift horse in the mouth or something.”

April closed her eyes, and her lips formed a thin line. “Of course. Of course. I know why Mikey has such a strong connection to Donnie, and why Donnie’s first appearance was so different from all the others.”

Raph crossed his arms. He wasn’t seeing the point here. “Mind tellin’ us why that is?”

“He wasn’t afraid,” April said, opening her eyes again. She seemed more like her old self, more alive again, but also… deeply sad. “Mikey wasn’t afraid. That’s the difference- I can’t believe we missed that, he wasn’t afraid.”

“Uh, why does that matter?” Casey spoke up.

“Because- Mikey didn’t create a feedback loop. Donnie was too weak to stick around, but he also didn’t get scattered or- or mixed up because of extra emotion or anything and-” April cut herself off, and laughed shakily. “We’ve been the ones doing it, making every visit so scary. Not Donnie. He uses our emotions to anchor himself, not his own, and if we’re giving him nothing but fear to feed on- what do you think is going to happen? It’ll just drag all of his fear to surface, and create on big feedback loop of sheer terror. He’s been acting the way he has because of us.”

Raph’s throat felt tight as he digested that information.

When Donnie had appeared, or started to try and appear, what had been Raph’s first reaction? Fear. Suspicion. Eventually it’d been desperation to get to his brother, but not before Raph had felt real and full terror run through him.

Shit. Shit. They’d just been building things up for one another too. Every time someone had a visit from Donnie, they’d expected the worst and gotten the worst. By the time they’d all collected together, with emotions and tempers running high- Raph definitely not an exception- they’d all been complete snarls of fear and anxiety.

Raph slowly grasped his knees, as the full gravity of what they’d been putting Donnie through settled in him. The way Donnie had been acting, the reactions and near attacks and bipolar moods- shit, the only reason he’d been doing that was- “He was only acting like a monster because that’s how we saw him.”

April nodded grimly, another humorless laugh coming from her. “We’re the ones that did that to him. Not Donnie. He was just trying to reach out to us, and I- we screwed even that up for him. God.”

“Shit,” Casey muttered, seeming just as thrown as Raph felt. “Shit. So ‘cause we all freaked out, ‘cept for Mikey, Don freaked out?”

April nodded again, and Casey slumped back against the couch. Raph’s friend put a hand on his forehead, pushing his bangs from his face as he muttered, again, “Shit.”

Raph could agree with that statement.

Leo had put his head in his hands, and was pressing the heels of his palms onto his eyes. Their father had also lowered his head, ears laid flat and stressed.

“My son, oh my son…” Splinter said softly. “What have we done to you?”

Tense quiet followed Splinter’s words, everyone still reeling from what they’d just figured out.

After everything- after all the stupid, horrible shit Donnie had been through- they’d gone and done this to him too. Raph didn’t even know where to begin, other than to reprimand himself for ever doubting his brother.

God. If- when they got Donnie back, Raph wasn’t even sure how he could apologize for this.

Splinter raised his head again after a long pause, and he looked straight at Mikey. “Michelangelo, tell me, were you truly so unafraid of your brother’s appearance?”

“Well, duh,” Mikey said, giving them all a look. “I mean… he’s just Donnie, so why would I be?”

Hearing it said so plainly, and without even a hint of hesitation, really drove home how stupid they’d all been.

Raph felt like an idiot, and like a huge jerk. To both of his younger brothers.

Mikey noticed how Raph and their family were staring, and he squirmed under the five gazes set on him. “Jeeze guys, why the looks? I know it’s stupid, but come on-”

“No,” Raph said, cutting him off before Mikey could finish that sentence. “No it’s not. It’s not even a little stupid. It’s what we all should have done, but we didn’t.”

“Raphael is right,” Splinter said, bringing the attention over to him. He looked at both Raph and Mikey evenly. “We all should never have doubted your brother, no matter what form he had taken. In this, I failed, and I know that many of you have as well. We have done a great disservice to Donatello, and I pray we have chance to rectify it.”

Mikey blinked at the sudden praise, and didn’t seem to know what to do with it. “Uh. Yeah. Me too.”

Splinter nodded once at Mikey, and then turned to the person who held the key to everything. “April? We have found the source of the connection, what is the next step?”

Raph’s hands went into fists again without his conscious choice, and he turned to look at April too. Much as he didn’t like it, and didn’t trust her, April still held all the cards. That meant he had to listen, and restrain his resurging anger at her.

For Donnie. For the chance to get him back.

Raph would do anything, same as he knew his brothers would. Even if that meant listening to the person who’d killed their missing sibling.

April sat up straighter, and Raph saw her regain a bit more of her old self. Her eyes were still dark, though. Still grim. “I didn’t get all of Donnie’s instructions, since he ripped most of them back out with him. But, I did get an idea from everything we’ve talked about. He’ll be back soon, I know he will, and he’ll be collected enough again to speak. We just have to keep him balanced this time. We’re going to need all of us, and a lot lights…”

continued.

[nomorebigwords]

an okay start for 2018!

Hey good looking,

We’re gonna do a new journaling process for 2018. From weekly to bi-weekly and now… monthly!

This is mostly because I think not all weeks are eventful. Also I feel like I’m trying to force myself to process things I’m not ready to do at that time. Journaling helps me to keep things in perspective. But at the same time it feels toxic that I’m just talking to myself. I’m literally regurgitating the happy and sad moments all to myself. It doesn’t help my dude.

Anyway let’s go to some of the stuff that happened this January!

For the first two weeks of January. I got rekt. No literally. I was vomiting my insides out. Through my butt!! Acute gastro-thingy my doctor said (whom I’ve unfortunately ditched). I was forcefully removed from the job I honestly am degrading internally in. I got better though. But it kinda didn’t hide the fact I wasn’t doing well mentally or emotionally. My lead even noticed since the last week of 2017. I honestly thought it was just the sickness. Convinced even.

But I felt bad when I met up with Renzo and Gail. It was a wake up call. They were honestly happy that when I loosened up after drinking alcohol. In verbatim it looked like I someone had died. Fuck.

Also hey you met up with Renzo!!! Wahoo. Talked about how unhappy I was with my career. Wanted to resign. Want some stability. The works. Also did the co-op playthrough for the Remnant Architect. We aced it oh yes.

Then unto the next thing.

I got promoted. I mean I was amazed. I honestly I was gonna get fired!!!! But hey more money mo problems amirite? It felt nice. But at the same time. I’m not as ecstatic as I should be.

I actually want to leave some sentences. Well about the evening of January 19. And well into the early morning of January 20.

I admitted I wanted to have something more with Isaac. He told me he wasn’t ready. And that he couldn’t give what I needed. I wanted to call bullshit. But then again. Who am I kidding? I did feel have that extreme need. And I was feeding on the barely there connection. And we mostly had our moments under the influence of alcohol. That’s a lot of warning signs.

And honestly I retold the story a lot of people. But this is me so I’m gonna focus on the highlights.

1. Also meet with chung’s bff who was really fun once nawalan ng hiya HAHAHA 2. We share the same sentiments in our career (ie dev isn’t what we want, we want to see the bigger picture of what we do.) 3. Got rekt. Hard. 4. Almost never left Isaac’s side hahaha 5. Was a little touchy feely. 6. The only time when I didn’t think of kissing him (at least anything my sober self can remember) 7. He is an understanding motherfucker 8. He literally saw the second worst version of myself. And he stayed. 9. Somehow even after being rejected, I felt my feelings gotten stronger. Or maybe it’s Stockholm Syndrome. 10. He actually did take care of me though. 11. And most of the time I was just countlessly spewing out “I hate you.” 12. Then he said “I hate me too.” 13. And I lost it 14. And I told him he can’t hate himself I can only do that 15. And then he made me sit  on the edge of the sidewalk 16. “Tell me what car do you see?” 17. “Why the fuck-“ 18. “Mikey, what’s the car in front of you?” 19. “It’s a Toyota, I don’t get-“ 20. “What about that one, tell me the colour.”

Motherfucker somehow saw I was lowkey having a mental breakdown. And he did the grounding technique. We went to McDonald’s and I didn’t want anything. He ordered me a coke. And I kept staring at him. He was fucking tired. His eyes were already bloodshot, and he was only barely awake.

“Why don’t you leave?” “I’m leaving only if you’re okay with it.”

Then we want back to our side of the street. He probably smoked. And there was a calm after the shitstorm that was me.

Fuck.

---

now on to the remaining part of 2018, I mean January.

I got my performance rating, it’s 2.8 out of 4. I’m within target. Great. I still want it to be higher still. Ron pointed out that I should be thankful and proud blah blah. I still have lots to improve on. L O A D S. ((and honestly i’m at a tipping point if i should just resign and start over)

also… living in qc again.

IT IS THE BEST DECISION I’VE MADE IN 2018 SO FAR. I mean sure it’s a hell a lot more expensive. The travel is abysmal. But lord sleeping in your own room, in your own bed. Fuck me. f u c k m e. u p. Honestly my quality of sleep has just increased exponentially.

Also I’ve been craving more and more to just go out of the closet. But I don’t have the safety net yet for any fallout. Ugh.

I’m also decided to again to try more and thus I hope to share with you some more meaningful progress.  11 months to go 2018.