#yeah you were exhausted for a long time because you felt the pressure to date and get married | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

writingsfromhome · 2 years ago

Text

The Ex-Text

Epilogue: what’s next

A/N: this isn’t so much an epilogue than a part two but it just fit better to call it one lol. But it’s the final instalment in the Ex-Text so make sure you read the first two. As always, ty for reading this far <3

Prologue (text) / Main (ex) / Epilogue (what’s next)

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It was a bit of a wet morning but I was determined to have a good day. And it’s like the world listened because by the time I got my morning coffee the sun had decided to kiss my skin hello. It was a Friday, I had a weekend of bachelorette festivities—our last girls weekend before Taz officially married next weekend. And I was going to a job I loved after changing roles last year, and getting promoted to the position I’d been chasing after.

It had been a year and 7 months since the night I decided to change. It wasn’t linear by any means but I had a better sense of who I was and what I wanted nowadays. I stuck up for myself, and felt less end-of-the-world if someone didn’t like me. I wasn’t perfect all the time, but things were better.

I’m so excited for tomorrow, I read Taz’s text in the lift up. I’d set up a spa day for the bridesmaids, and then a potentially rowdy evening across a few bars with a scavenger hunt. As the maid of honour I took my duties very seriously. I was friends with most of the invitees either from childhood or through Taz—there were a handful of girls from high school that Taz and I were friends with who I hadn’t seen in a while. It was going to be an interesting weekend.

***

“So YN,” Taz’s cousin slides in beside me wiggling her phone. This was our second pub on the list and she had the lead for the scavenger hunt by two. The group had enough drinks that everyone was loud and comfortable even though not everyone knew each other well. “How far along are you?”

“I’m not playing,” I made the game. I tell her that.

“Oh c’mon!” She looks at the girls sitting near us. “You’re just trying to get out of some of these! Like kiss a stranger, or find a way to write your number on someone’s arm? You’re cheeky with these—find someone to do a musical number with—“

“That’s how I know I’m not winning the hunt,” Felicity says. “I’m shite at dancing.”

“No you was so good back in school,” Taz giggles as she catches up. “Dots was even better, remember when she went with that wanker to the year 11 dance and oh what was his name-“

“I heard my name,” Dots pokes her head through. “You lot are loud.”

“Have you heard them?” Taz’s cousin points to the other end of the table. Someone’s getting a shot poured directly into their mouth.

“Taz are you participating in the hunt?” Felicity waves her phone that has the app pulled up.

“I’m getting married in a week so…only the PG ones.”

“No one’s going to say anything if you do number 7,” Dots winks. I smile uncomfortably, remembering the grip the peer pressure these girls had in high school that lead me to some pretty bad decisions.

“Taz is too much of an angel to do anything like that,” I try to swoop in for her.

“Then you should do it for her.” Dots says, her eyes alight with mischief. “Since you’re not playing. That way the bride-to-be has a chance to win.”

“Yeah!” Felicity jumps right into the plan eagerly. “It’s not like you’re dating someone right?”

“I…”

“I don’t need to win that bad,” Taz tries to come to my rescue but the plan is too enticing for these girls.

“Oh yeah YN you never got back on the horse after…Ethan?” Taz’s cousin mouths the word like he was going to appear if she said it too loud.

“No it’s…” I’m tempted to lie. To look good. Everyone leans in to hear the end of my sentence and I blurt out. “It’s complicated.”

“Ooh what’s that mean?” They move in closer and I feel crushed. I avoid Taz’s eye, she knew I hadn’t dated in forever. Not for lack of wanting, but I found opening myself up to new people was more exhausting than it used to be. Being in one long term relationship after the other, then taking a huge break, now dating felt like learning to walk again.

“Um,” I try to backtrack on the lie. “It’s just complicated but technically I’m not dating someone right now!”

“Wait so you’re not bringing a plus one to the wedding?” Someone asks.

“Well I-“

“You should invite the guy! If he comes you know he’s serious and if he doesn’t…”

“Yeah!” Felicity grabs my arm. “Invite him! I want to see Ethan’s rebound that manwhore.”

“It’s not really a rebound when it’s been years,” Taz says. I agree, but I’m also touched by the vehemence in Fel’s voice when she talks about Ethan.

“Well screw the guy. If he’s complicated, you can kiss anyone you want at any bar you want. So?”

“YN,” Taz’s murmur catches my attention. She shoots me a warning, I had to put my foot down. Not give in because I wanted to please. I should but with this many eyes on me I chicken out.

“Fine. But maybe pick number 7 at the next bar, this group looks uni aged.” I feel Taz’s disappointment beside me.

“So? I had a thing with a 21 year old last summer,” Fels shrugs.

“Ew. Didn’t you feel like his mother?” Taz asks and I laugh, a bit of the pent up energy releasing with it.

“No, he was a big boy. He knew how to take care of himself.” She grins. The topic shifts to her and I think I’m forgotten until the hour hits and we decide to move places.

“Okay YN I know you’ve mapped this all out but if we’re trying to get you a good number 7 I know a better place where I used to live. Last summer actually.” Felicity links her arm through mine as we walk out.

“We know how well that went,” Taz’s cousin teases.

“Exactly! May I? Girls! Change of location on the third cuz Taz has to win tonight-“

“I really don’t want the gift card that badly.” Taz says but it’s drowned out by everyone cheering. God we were all well on our way to drunk.

***

“That one,” someone whispers to me. She points to a tall blonde with a cardigan on.

“Mmm too bookish,” someone else says. Somehow the whole group was debriefed on the way over that I was to have the most epic kiss with a stranger for Taz’s sake. Because even though she had three other missing items on her list, doing this would make her win.

“Well that creep over there just bought me shots,” Taz slurs. We look to where she points, it’s a guy who had been a potential kisser. The group crosses him out as well as the line item on her list. Now she was down to 2 to win.

Felicity had led us to her old local area, one I hadn’t spent much time in but sounded familiar. Even though I’d planned the pub crawl to the detail I had to let go of the control and go with the crowd.

“Okay YN you have to do this now,” Dot says. “You can kill two birds, then Taz is free to win.”

“Doesn’t anyone else want to win?” I ask pathetically.

“No!” The group encourages me. “You need this too YN!”

“Him,” Fels points to a guy sitting at the bar. He’s talking with the bartender who’s laughing at whatever he’s saying. “Look, he’s funny and nice enough to talk to the bartender. He’ll give you a nice smooch.” She kisses my cheek with this statement.

“Oh he’s cute,” Taz says and I glare at her.

“You can’t even see his face.” I tell her.

“Yeah but his hair is nice,” she rubs my cheek where Felicity kissed me. “And his shirt stretches nicely over-“

“Okay bride-to-be,” she was such a traitor.

“What? A girl can’t look?” Taz asks. She wraps an arm around my shoulder and leans in. “You don’t have to do this.”

“I know,” but with all these girls waiting on me to I didn’t have another choice. I just had to get over it. Plus I hadn’t kissed someone in over a year so I wasn’t complaining if he was cute. And Taz was right, from the back he was cute. “Fine.”

I step away from the crowd and they all gasp. They get ready for the show and so do I. I clear my throat, push my shoulders back—my cleavage looked great in this dress so I’m sure it wouldn’t hurt, and head over. My stomach drops with nerves but I take a deep breath and tap the bloke on the shoulder.

My lungs deflate like a released balloon when the face looking back at me is Harry. Harry the ex-texter.

He blinks, then blinks some more. Meanwhile I stand there staring.

“YN!?” Harry turns the barstool to face me. His neck must’ve started cramping.

“I-uh,” I glance back at the girls and they’re all pretending not to stare but it’s a bad attempt. They’re staring.

“It’s you-I-“ Harry stands up, it seems like he was going in for a hug but he thinks better of it almost immediately. “What are you doing here?”

“Hi,” I say lamely. I feel the shame of the last time we spoke. That YN feels like someone else. Someone people manipulated easily. Like him.

“I don’t know what’s going on,” he laughs nervously and his eyes roam up and down my body. He runs his fingers through his hair and looks back. “I think there’s a massive group of women there staring at us? Have you rounded up a gang to kick my-“

“Ignore them,” I quickly take a seat beside where he was sitting. He takes one last glance at them and sits back down.

“Can I get you a drink?”

“No no,” my mind is occupied. I couldn’t kiss him. This was the worst person in the world to have picked, why was he here damnit?

Then I remember why this area was familiar to me. His address was only a street or so over, this is close to where I’d picked him up that day.

“Actually, I’ll do a a vodka soda.”

He orders for me while I try to sort out my thoughts.

“So are you in a cult? Am I some sort of blood sacrifice?” Harry throws another glance over his shoulder.

I finally look at him. He looked good, of course he did. He’d decided to do something about those razor blades—he’d thrown them out; he sports a mustache and stubble. His hair is styled, nicer than it was when I met him. His eyes are murky waters and I don’t look at them too long. I spot the gym bag by his feet, so that’s why his shirt fit so well…

Omg.

“Actually,” I consider what he’d just said. “You’re not too far off.”

“Wait really?” His eyes bug out. “You’re joking.”

“Well the cult is actually a bridal party,” I say. “And the blood sacrifice is a number on our scavenger hunt.”

“Oh,” it dawns on him. “I’m fresh blood. You already have my number, wait is that why you came up to me?”

“No I actually didn’t even know it was you,” I say honestly. “They picked you out from the crowd.”

“Really?” Harry looks back, now intrigued that this group of women found him fit enough to pick out.

“Don’t let it get to your head,” I roll my eyes. My drink had landed in front of me so I take a sip.

“Well? You have my number right?” When I just nod he laughs. “Wait. You need something more.”

“Well obviously I’m going to lose this scavenger hunt,” I scowl. “Don’t worry.”

He chuckles and looks to the front, meanwhile I try not to squirm. Being around him wasn’t the best feeling, especially on my way to drunk. I felt hot with embarrassment and yet the intrigue of who he really was still stayed with me. And it stays because even now, despite not trusting him or liking him very much I felt like I had room to just be myself. He was an easy presence despite his baggage. Or maybe because of it.

It seems we were good at silences because we drink without saying a word. It’s like our brains are catching up to our sudden run-in.

“How have you been?” Harry asks quietly.

Fine, I’m going to say automatically. But I answer truthfully. “Alright. Life’s been better but also nobody’s tricked me into going to a cheating ex’s wedding so life’s been a lot worse!”

He laughs awkwardly and clinks his bottle against my glass. “Yeah. I deserve that.”

“Yeah. How about you?”

“Better. A lot better.”

“Good to hear,” I say genuinely. Despite my grievances it was nice to hear he was past whatever he’d been in when we first met.

“I think about you often,” he says while still looking forward. Oh god this felt like being in a car with him. I turn my body towards him and tap my knee against his. He looks at me, like we’re having an actual conversation. “I do. About what I did to you…I’m sorry.”

“Yeah you’ve said.”

“Yeah,” he grimaces. I wasn’t going to let him off the hook so easily. Being manipulated and lied to like that still stung. It was rock bottom for me in a way. “I was a dick. I’m deeply sorry and I’ve thought about how to make it up to you but I thought I should just stop texting you ever. Trust me that was rock bottom for me and you didn’t deserve to be dragged down with me.”

I try not to look surprised when he says it was his rock bottom, like I was thinking seconds earlier.

“You got one thing right,” I tap at his phone. I wasn’t going to tell him I forgave him, or that I understood even though I did. I didn’t like him very much, I didn’t trust him, but I knew he was sorry when he said it.

I remember the wedding—there was something I wanted to apologize for, “Well now that we’re unloading apologies, I am actually sorry for uhm, slapping you that night? That’s not me. And I don’t know where it came from! I feel bad about that.”

His laugh is quiet, to himself. “You shouldn’t be apologizing for anything. Anything at all YN.”

God, the way he says my name is addictive. He said it like everyone else, but in his voice…

“I know. But that crossed a line…”

“Nah don’t worry. Plus I don’t mind when a woman slaps me around a little,” his face splits into a grin when I give him the reaction he was looking for.

“Harry,” I scold. “You’re teaching children with that mouth?”

“That’s why I’m quitting.”

“You’re quitting!?”

“Yep. Phase 3 of my plan, to live the life I want. I’m finishing the school year and looking for a job in my field over the summer.”

“Wow,” I was impressed. “Wow Harry. Good luck with that.”

“Yeah I’ll need it thanks.” The way he looks at me makes me nervous. I think I’ve been single a bit too long. And right on cue he asks: “So YN how about you? Are you still doing your single thing?”

“I feel like you’re still talking about it like you don’t believe in it,” I tell myself to calm down every time he says my name.

“No I-“ he plays with his bottle. “I believe you. I’ve tried it, it’s been good for me. But I started dating again this year and I found I really love that too.”

“Yeah?” I ask him more about it. He tells me he’s dating knowing what he wants now. What kind of woman he’s looking for.

I felt like focusing on myself has helped me with that too. The only issue is I was finding it hard to open myself up to men again.

“I haven’t been dating much,” at all. “But I’m open to it now.”

“Show anyone your mean side lately?” He jokes but in there is a serious question.

“That’s only reserved for you,” I say, then realize how flirty it sounds and clamp down on my tongue. Maybe I should stop drinking. I didn’t even know Harry very well. But when I peek a glance he looks flushed.

I liked this version of Harry better. I wonder if he was like this before, before he had his heart broken, or even before he started dating Vanessa. But I don’t tell him that, I didn’t want him to think we were friends or anything.

We fall into silence again, not an uncomfortable one though. I look at him, he looked the same but different. Like a change had taken place underneath the surface. I imagine he’s studying me the same way. He smiles and I return it.

A body pushing into the side of me interrupts us. Dots is there with Taz and they wave the bartender down for a drink even though they could’ve ordered from the table. I roll my eyes and turn to them.

“Hi,” I look between them. Dots looks mischievous as usual and Taz seems curious.

“Aren’t you going to introduce us YN?” Dots asks.

“Oh, this is Harry,” I eye Taz when I say it. She’s a bit slow but when I introduce them to Harry it dawns on her. Her face darkens as she pinpoints who he is.

“Harry is it?” Taz asks. “I’ve never met a Harry I liked.”

Dots looks over at her like she’s grown another head, clued out and assuming I was still here to kiss him.

“Oh well…” Harry looks just as confused at her sudden intensity. “I hope I can change your mind about that?”

“Too late for that,” she nearly spits out. I watch his eyes widen and then go to me. I’m biting back a smile.

“Taz, right you’re Taz.” He sounds like he remembers her.

“And I’m Dots,” Dots repeats. Poor girl was clueless. “We’re just doing a bachelorette thing and YN seemed to think you were cute enough to ditch us right?”

“Really?” Harry takes pleasure in playing along.

“Well no I—ow!” Dots interrupts me by smashing her elbow into me. I sigh. “Right. Yeah. You were irresistible, I had to ditch my friends for a man like you.”

“Sarcasm,” Harry says just low enough for me to hear. He’s smiling.

“YN you should come back,” Taz tries to grab my arm but Dots is like a pro as she cuts that off.

“No we’re just doing the same thing back there. Talking and drinking. You two enjoy. You should give him your number here.” She drops a sharpie in my hand. “Let’s go Taz.”

I try to warn Taz with my expression, please don’t tell anyone I know him. None of these girls knew I went to Ethan’s wedding, it was an embarrassing story on my timeline I didn’t need to share. I didn’t want them to know the story of how I knew Harry.

“Your friends are scary.”

“I guess,” I turn back to him. My drink was nearly empty and I did think it was time to go back. “I should go back to them.”

“Oh,” he looks disappointed.

“What?”

“I thought we were having a nice time.”

“Yeah well we were catching up. And now my drink’s finished and I’m-“

“I can buy you another?”

“I think I’ve had enough. This is our third place on our night crawl so…”

“Fair.” Harry looks at me like he has something to say. I stand there and wait but in the end he just sighs and sits back down.

“Oh yeah I’m going to write my number,” I grab his arm and pull his sleeve up. Holy muscles. “on your arm. If that’s alright?”

“Sure,” he smiles and his dimples make an appearance. It’s boyish, like we’re teenagers exchanging numbers.

I write it down even though he had it, cap the marker, and look up. We’re so close; his eyes flit to my mouth and away so quickly I almost miss it.

“I’ll get this tattooed,” Harry jokes.

“I’ll change my number if you do,” I warn him. He just shrugs like he didn’t believe me and I shake my head, turning back to my friends.

I get back to a group of disappointed women. They give me a hard time and tell me how upset they are that I don’t care about Taz winning. They try to tell me how good we looked together, how I looked with him.

“We’re not leaving until you kiss him,” Felicity says.

“Leave her alone! He smelled like bad news,” Taz says. She was well past drunk now so no one listens to her.

“Ethan was bad news,” Fels states. “This guy is just a random man you can kiss and invite as a plus one. Have some fun with him. Get back into the pool where all the fish are. C’mon YN we know your dating life is shite!”

“Remind me to never get drunk with you lot,” I stare at them. They were scary. “I gave him my number, at least Taz can cross that out!”

“Wait! Harry!” Everyone begins to shout his name as they spot him leaving behind me.

I catch him turning with a wary expression. He points to himself. The girls shout “Yes!” and earn some dirty looks from the other patrons.

He walks up to our table like a sacrifice to an ancient ritual. “You ladies need something?”

“Yes,” a few voices say but Felicity is the loudest. She points to Taz who has her head down on the table. I should check on her.

“See this beautiful creature here? She’s getting married! Married! And we have a scavenger hunt. And she can almost win! But she needs to kiss someone at the bar. But she’s getting married! And you look decent enough to help this bride-to-be! So YN her wonderful friend is helping out. And she chickened out up there. So she wants to kiss you. Does she have your permission?”

“Does she?” He turns to me. God I was helpless with the pressure around me. My eyes lock onto Harry and I hope he can read the help etched into them.

“This is silly,” I tell him. “We don’t need to do this. I don’t think Taz even cares.”

“I don’t!” I guess she was conscious because she lifts her head to answer me. But everyone crowds her out, her cousin actually guides her head back down.

“You owe her a kiss,” Dots says proudly.

“I owe her a lot actually,” Harry says to me. My heart races as we look at each other.

I would be lying if I said the idea of kissing him doesn’t intrigue me. He was attractive! And his facial hair made him more so. But I didn’t want to complicate anything.

What’s there to complicate? I ask myself. It’s not like he’s in your life. Plus maybe this will be the push to start dating again. Kisses are nice right?

“Okay whatever,” I take a step towards him. “It’s not like this means anything. It’s just a kiss.”

A cheer goes up with the group.

Harry drops his bag to the floor and takes the other step to me. “It doesn’t mean anything?”

“No,” I say more to myself. “It’s just a kiss with a guy.”

“Just a kiss with a guy,” Harry repeats. “If you say so.”

His hand reaches up to my neck and he pulls me gently to him, with his height I crane my face up and his warm lips come down on mine exactly how I imagined it would feel. That’s when I realize I had imagined how he would feel. But it’s too late by then.

It feels like hearing music live for the first time, I can suddenly hear every atom of the song. I can feel it, taste it, even smell the soundwaves pounding through the room. That’s what the kiss feels like. Ultrasonic and consuming as hell.

He’s gentle but I can tell he’s holding back with the way his hand grips the back of my head tight. And that sends my senses into overdrive. Even though his moustache is a bit tickly, he was a really good kisser.

When we part, I laugh because I’m nervous but also he has lipstick on his face.

“That was hot,” someone in the group says but we can’t take our eyes off of each other. I’m trying to remember how to breathe and it seems like Harry is doing the same.

“You have-“ I laugh nervously again and reach up to wipe the lipstick from the side of his mouth. This close his pupils are blown out and it only confirms to me that he was holding back. Because he looks like a man who can barely contain himself.

“Uhm,” he finally breaks his gaze to look at all the women staring. “I hope that was satisfactory enough.”

“That was movie worthy,” everyone begins shouting scores out. Some of then fan themselves with the menu. Harry clears his throat, picks up his bag, does an awkward half-bow, and stiffly nods to me.

“G’night YN.”

“Yeah…thanks.” I didn’t know what to say after having the most intense kiss of my life. To Harry. The ex-texter.

“I need some water after that,” Felicity climbs over me out of the booth and I slide in by Taz.

“I’m sorry,” she wraps her arms around my shoulder. “We have really shitty friends.”

“You have amazing friends,” Dots says. “We just broke YN’s dry spell. Did you see that? That was chemistry YN. That was wow. I hope you got his number.”

“I have it,” I sigh.

I decide I was going to drink more. I didn’t want to remember this night anymore.

***

It’s the Friday after and I’m at work, it’s a slow day so I’m scrolling through my phone when a notification pops up.

It was Harry.

Hi. I text back. I’d been thinking about him a lot this week, about the kiss, and about dating again. I wouldn’t admit it to my friends but it was a reminder that chemistry existed somewhere out there.

I don’t want our whole relationship to be wedding crashing so I want to run something past you.

???

Your friend Felicity invited me to Taz’s wedding. Tomorrow. She said you knew but you haven’t texted me all week so I think she’s setting you up?

I couldn’t believe it. I text Felicity and she responds immediately with a kissy emoji and a tongue sticking out.

I’m sorry I didn’t know, Fels just confirmed. You don’t need to come she’s just on this mission to get me a date.

She said you have a flaky boyfriend?

Oh my god the lie had spread. So embarassing, I was going to strangle Fels.

Really I’m alright. Sorry about that.

I would like to see you again. Even if it’s at a wedding. But I’ll only go if you invite me.

Wow. I read the message another time then put my phone away. What was I supposed to do?

I take my phone into the toilets and call Taz. She picks up, it sounds like she’s in a car.

“Hi you free?”

“Yeah I’m just getting back from the salon, what’s going on?”

I tell her. I tell her it all, the conversation Harry and I had and how I was feeling and what Felicity did.

“That one does not know how to keep her nose out of people’s businesses.”

“I know,” I groan. “I could not invite him and get a million questions from everyone who knows Fels invited him. And I keep him out of my life. Which is fine because I barely know him (even though that kiss felt like I’ve known him for all of eternity). But if I invite him, I’m telling him I’m okay with what he did to me. That we’re okay.”

“YN listen,” she sighs. She says something to someone on her end and I hear a car door close. “Look—sorry just getting in. You’re not that person anymore. I don’t trust him more than you do but just tell him that. So he knows you’re only taking him to get everyone to shut up. Like…use him as a date like he used you.”

“Hm,” that was a good point. “Yeah. That could actually work?”

“Really? I thought I was just saying shite,” Taz laughs. “Okay I really have to go my in-laws are here. Are you alright?”

“Yeah yeah you focus on your stuff. I’ll be by this evening.”

“Love you, bye!”

I call Harry immediately after. He doesn’t pick up so I go back to my desk and consider what to text him when he calls back.

“YN I was still in class sorry.”

“Oh god sorry I forgot!” I look at the time. “Sorry I just assumed you were free.”

“No it’s alright,” he answers. “Are you calling about tomorrow?”

“Yeah…” my mouth is suddenly parched. I get up and walk away from where people could hear me. “So, the thing is my friends are giving me a hard time because I don’t have a date and all that. So sort of the way you used me as a date at that wedding, I could use you at this one. Like if would be doing me a favour?” I cringe as the words come out.

“Oh. Sure…yeah if you want.” He sounds…offended?

“Like if we’re being honest we’ve not really spoken since that night. And I have no reason to trust you and whatever. So this is just…”

“Returning the favour.” He puts it simply.

“Yeah? Yeah! Right. Exactly.” Why was this coming out so horribly.

“I get it,” he says. “I’m glad we talked. I’d be happy to be your plus one tomorrow.”

“Perfect,” I find myself smiling.

***

Taz’s wedding is a dream. An absolute dream. I tell her a million times after the ceremony and I gush to her how much I love her and am proud of her during speeches. Her bridesmaids give their toast, and every person who was at the bachelorette makes sure to tease me about bringing Harry who had been nothing but supportive tonight. He stuck to himself when I was doing maid-of-honour duties, and squeezed my hand encouragingly before my speech because public speaking was not my favourite thing. I had to admit it was nice to have someone here just for me. It had been a while.

When Taz told me she got engaged a couple years ago I always thought it would be Ethan by my side. It was weird that Harry was here, because of Ethan, but also the way he came to be here.

“Hi!!” I shout at Harry after doing shots with the bridesmaids. I was officially tipsy but most of the major wedding traditions were over. We were waiting for the cake cutting and bouquet toss and the first dance. And then it was all fun.

“Hi,” he holds out an arm to guide me to my seat.

“I hate these heels,” I unstrap my feet and groan when I put my feet on the bare floor. “That feels sooo good.”

“Hi!” A chirpy voice says to my right. I peek an eye open and groan again, Felicity has joined the table.

“Hi, Felicity right?” Harry says.

“Fels,” she nudges me. “You glad he came?”

“Whatever,” I shrug.

“She’s happy you came,” Fels tries to make up for my rudeness. “She’s not usually this rude.”

“I find that hard to believe,” Harry says. I cut him a look.

“Oh no she’s very nice. She’s just a bit grumpy probably all the maid of honour duties,” she tries to convince a Harry that’s just sharing an inside joke with me. It does something to me.

“It’s okay,” I put a hand on Fels’. “He’s teasing. I’m allowed to be rude to him.”

Harry laughs and Felicity realizes too late she was sitting in on two people that didn’t need her help to get along.

“Well I’m going to find my date, play nice!”

“Nice suit,” I tug at Harry’s lapels once she’s gone. It was nicer than what he wore the last time we met.

“I borrowed it from a friend. I only have one suit and…well you’ve seen it.”

“Teachers don’t wear suits to work?” I tease.

“Thank god no.” His eyes roam over my bridesmaid dress, an off the shoulder sage dress that honestly reminded me of a folky tinkerbell. “You look beautiful.”

“Flattery won’t get you extra points.” I say whilst flattered. The dress had also reminded me of the colour of his eyes when he greeted me today. Now his eyes stay on me all evening.

The announcement for cake cutting goes off so I walk with Harry to watch. Taz looked beautiful in her embroidered dress and she glows even while narrowly missing cake all over her face. Everyone toasts and she readies for a bouquet toss.

“You’re standing here,” Taz’s cousin centres me. “Because there’s no way I’m catching that.”

“I don’t even have a boyfriend,” I say but the other girls crowd me so I stay put. The bouquet is tossed high and I don’t make much of an effort but it glances off the hand in front of me and lands on me. I squish it against me to keep it from falling.

“YN!” My friends tease me and I hold it up in mock excitement. Taz laughs from up front and I go up to hug her, I’m handed another flute of champagne and I toss it back with my best friend.

“YN’s next,” one of the bridesmaid says. “Cheers!”

I get another drink and down it with the girls. I can’t stop laughing about it. I try to look out for Harry to see how he feels about the bouquet but he must be in a darker corner. I don’t spot him.

I refuse the next drink pushed my way and move to my seat as the couple gets ready for their first dance. Harry’s not there but he sits down shortly after I do.

“Look!” I show him the bouquet. “I caught it!”

“I saw,” he smells the flowers. “I got a picture of you.”

“Let me see!” I hold my hand out and wait for him to find it.

“Oh my god,” I laugh as I zoom into my face as the flowers hit me. “Look at my face! And look at her! This is a great pic…” the words die on my lips. I’d accidentally swiped to the camera roll zooming out and I see dozens of photos of me.

“Oh,” Harry takes the phone from me. “Is that creepy? Sorry I was taking photos to send you since you’re busy having fun I-“

I feel tears threaten my makeup and I clench my mouth closed. Despite all the drinks I suddenly feel incredibly sobered.

I take his phone back and swipe through, he recorded my speech and took a million photos of me with Taz. My chin trembles.

“Hey I’m sorry,” Harry takes the phone back. “I didn’t mean to upset you I’ll delete-“

“No!” I stop him. “Don’t. I want all of them.”

“Why are you…” his confusion is all over his face. “Are you upset?”

“No,” I blink away any tears. “Sorry. No. I’m okay! I’m alright.”

It was stupid but Ethan never took photos of me. Even on important days like birthdays, Christmas, holidays. I had a million candid photos of him but I had to beg and remind him for photos of me. Harry took so many without even asking, just because he knew I would want to look back on the memories I was making. It was such a basic thing to do but it felt like the world to me in this moment.

“Thank you.” I say when he doesn’t make a move. “Honestly thank you. Sorry, ignore what my face is saying! But make sure you send every single one okay?”

“Yeah I will,” he promises. He swipes a fallen tear with a gentle smile. I draw back from his touch and use a napkin to dab at my eyes instead.

“YN you know I’m really sorry,” he says just as the first song comes on.

“No I’m fine!” I shift my chair to face the dancefloor. I position it slightly ahead of Harry so he leans forward to speak to me.

“I mean about the other wedding we went to.”

“Yeah I-“ he looks serious so I stop what I was saying. I turn slightly so I can look at him. “Can we talk about it later?”

“Yeah,” he shakes his head. “I didn’t mean to…”

“Okay,” I smile and turn back to admire the couple but I can sense the emotional turmoil beside me. I push my chair back enough to be side by side with Harry. I lean my head on his shoulder as I watch the married couple dance the first dances of many. When Harry puts his arm around me, his thumb rubs my shoulder. A finger pokes my arm and Dots face pops in beside me to waggle her eyebrows. Was everyone watching me with Harry tonight?!

When the DJ invites everyone else onto the dancefloor I pull Harry up.

“So what was it you were saying?” I ask as we wrap arms around each other.

“I like you a lot YN. A lot. Even when we first met, I started liking you right when you returned my bullshit with sarcasm. You rolled with all my jokes. It was a breath of fresh air.”

I don’t say anything; he had more to say.

“I wish I didn’t do what I did. I sabotaged everything because I was hung up over the wrong girl. And now I’m just a guy to you. A guy you kissed once, I’m just a favour returned.”

“Why are you telling me this now?” I ask.

“Just in case you felt anything, if you thought we could…”

“Harry you lied to me. Embarrassed me. You weren’t a very nice person.”

“I know-“

“I do like this Harry better.”

“Uhm,” he thinks. “Thanks. It’s old Harry, before my life went to hell. Old Harry mixed with some lessons learned. I’m telling you I was at rock bottom when I did what I did.”

“I believe you.” I did.

He sighs in relief. “Thank you.”

We dance quietly for a bit. Until I speak, “I’m trying not to date losers.”

He flexes his jaw, fixating on a spot behind my shoulder.

“I thought you were one,” I tell him honestly. “But I’m not so sure now. But this feels like asking a lot Harry I…”

“You don’t need to respond now,” he urges. “Just think about it.”

“I can’t,” I was terrified of agreeing to a relationship that would hurt me all over again. “I do like you Harry but I don’t know if I can agree to what you want…”

The truth was that Harry was showing me that the glimpses I’d gotten of him throughout the last week were more telling, more consistent than the guy he was when we first met. I was deathly afraid of getting hurt again, and I’m not sure I was willing to take the risk. If that kiss was any indication, I know Harry was telling the truth on his end but I didn’t want a relationship with a guy who started it off by lying.

“I’m-excuse me,” Harry stops mid-dance and walks away. I feel awful but I let him go, watch him disappear to the lobby, and I sit back in my seat. Dots tries to wave me by but I ignore her. The lump in my throat sits heavily and I feel like shit. Especially when a few dances later Harry returns and announces he was going home early. His face is splotchy and it feels awful.

“Are you sure?” I ask him.

“Yeah,” he holds my arm. “Thank you for tonight, and again I’m really sorry about everything.”

I just pull him into a hug, with no words equivalent to what I should say. He squeezes once and lets go.

“Tell Taz thank you for the invite. I’ll see you around.”

“Okay…bye Harry.”

That’s the last I see of him. I head right to the drinks and drink enough to feel okay. I dance with my friends and get as many pictures as my phone can handle in.

At the end of the night I go home to an empty flat and drunkenly download all the dating apps I swore off of. Swiping through like a catalogue, by the time I wake up the next morning I’m well on my way back to the dating scene.

***

I stare at the man in front of me. His profile on the app was exactly the kind of guy I was looking for. And he’d actually made me laugh a few times tonight which was a bonus. But something feels like it’s missing—they all have this last month as I became a serial dater. I was really putting myself out there but nobody made it past date two.

“So how about heading out?” He asks after the bill.

“Yeah! Sure,” I grab my purse and we walk out. He grabs my hand as we step out.

“Want to share a ride?”

“Are we going to the same place?” I ask.

“If you want,” he pulls my hand and places it on his shoulder. He was cute, I could kiss him.

And I do, but it’s just a kiss. Just two mouths kissing. I don’t feel the spark, or the passion.

“Actually,” I pull away. “I forgot I have an early morning meeting so I think I should behave and head home by myself.”

“Oh,” he looks disappointed. “Well maybe we can do something on Friday?”

“Yeah I’ll text you?”

He pecks my lips, “Sounds good.”

I get a car and as I drive away from the date my hands stray to my lips. I remember another kiss, and then I slam the door shut on it. You can’t keep comparing all your kisses to that one!

Except the thing about telling my mind not to think about something, I do. I think about Harry, and question myself like I have been ever since the wedding if I made the wrong choice. Did I push him away too quickly, out of fear? Am I protecting myself or just scared?

I open the text exchange between us like I do weekly and hover my fingers over the keyboard. What do I say? What could I say?

I scroll to the top of the conversation and find his address and plug it into my phone. I was 18 minutes away.

“Excuse me could I change the drop off?” I ask the taxi driver. “I had a change of plans.”

He asks me where and he knew the area enough to take the left and head in that direction.

That was very impulsive. Maybe I shouldn’t have done that?

Adrenaline courses through my body as I pray that he still lived in the same place. What was I going to say?

My leg bounces up and down as I stare out the window, biting down on my lip. This was stupid, I made him bloody cry the last time I saw him. Then again I cried the time before that. Were we equal? Was I twisted enough to think this could all work?

I nearly jump out of the taxi after paying and walk to the front door. Of course, you needed a key card.

With shaking fingers I call Harry.

“Hello?”

I freeze. He was out, the sounds of people and music give that away.

“YN? Is that you?”

I was so stupid! Why did I do this?

“YN?” Now Harry sounds worried. I take a deep breath.

“Sorry! Wrong number. I meant to call som-“

“YN are you alright? Is everything okay?”

The background noise disappears. He must have stepped out.

“Yes sorry to worry you!” I squeak. “Everything’s fine.”

“Why did you call?” He asks as I ask “What are you doing right now?”

We laugh. Harry tells me, “You first.”

“It was an accident…”

“Oh well…a good accident.” I can hear his smile through the phone. “I was just grading final tests at my local pub.”

His local pub…that meant he was close by. I think. My heart picks up speed. “Oh! Is that something you do often?”

“Yeah some of these papers remind me why I’m quitting this job. So I drink to get through them.”

“Giving up on the youth of tomorrow?” I ask. I spot a bench a little ways away and head to it, next to a bike rack.

“Yes!” Harry laughs. “They’ve given up on me too. They’s all assholes nobody listens to me.”

“I would’ve liked to have you as a teacher,” I go for flirting. “None of my grade school teachers were good looking. I could’ve used a distraction.”

“So you’re admitting that I’m good looking,” Harry says just as I spot him heading to his door.

“Yeah in your grey t-shirt, I think so.”

I watch as he whips his head around and scans the area until he spots me.

“I lied,” I get up and wave at him. “I came by to see you but I was embarrassed when you weren’t home.”

“Why-“ his voice sticks. “Why did you come to see me?”

“Well,” by now we’re close enough that I could shout to him but I still use the phone. “I thought about what I said that night and I think I was too harsh.”

“And?” Harry stares at me as I walk up to him.

“And I want to believe that a second impression can be just as important as a first.”

He’s alight in a second, hope injected into his features. I stop a few feet away from him.

“I’ll take that. I’ll take it.”

“Okay,” I move in closer, lowering my phone. My eyes are on his lips and I don’t care that how badly I want to kiss him is plain as day. Because in the moment he reaches for me I know he wants this just as bad.

My mind is wiped clean when he kisses me—I kind of hate myself of a month ago for denying me of this all this time.

It’s indecent, the way we kiss out there. When my mind returns to my body I push him away, flushed and nervous.

“Should we take this up to your place?”

“Why? Are you getting shy?” He teases.

“Your neighbours are getting free entertainment,” I’m out of breath as I talk and this seems to make Harry smile even harder. He presses a hard kiss to me and then leads me by the hand up to his flat. We’re on each other with every pause we take, it’s gross and unlike me but I’m just too happy to stop. The spark, the passion, everything I’d been looking for is here.

“Can I uh,” Harry closes the door behind us as I continue kissing him, my lips finding any part of him. “Can I get you something to drink?”

“Sure,” I watch him unbutton my cardigan. “I’ll take a tall glass of whatever you’re serving.”

He smirks and pulls me back in. I jump when he tells me to and he carries me to wherever his bedroom is. I’m barely in the right state of mind to notice anything as I get lost in us. In the way his hands hold me, and the way his moustache feels on my skin. Maybe it’s been a while or maybe it was him but having this after so long makes it taste sweeter than it ever had.

***

“Happy six months,” Harry wraps his arms around me from behind. I’m making us coffee, we were up especially early because we were making the trip to see Harry’s family for the holidays. Usually this is when I went to Taz’s but this year she’d urged me to spend the time with my boyfriend’s family.

She’d been suspicious when I first told her about Harry. But when she saw how happy I was she’d given it her blessings (and I’m pretty sure threatened Harry with some dismemberment). I hadn’t had a big Christmas in a while, and Harry said he had more family coming into town. I was nervous to meet so many new people, people that meant a lot to Harry. But he assured me everyone would love me.

“Happy six month,” I reach up to peck his lips and settle against him. He hums as he tightens his arms around me. I couldn’t believe this was my life now, I was happier than I ever dared to think I could be. I never knew a relationship could be so complementing, so grounding.

Despite our rocky start, that Harry and I had discussed in depth when we first started dating, we were mostly smooth sailing. The way I saw it we met as two damaged people. Somehow we parted from there and ran like parallel lines until we were straightened out enough to meet again. And now we ran together as a pair of lines.

“I’m so lucky,” Harry presses a kiss to my temple, thinking the same thing I had been. “I’m the luckiest guy in the world YN. You make me the luckiest guy in the world.”

“Then that would make me Mrs. Luckiest-Guy-in-the-World,” I joke as I turn in his embrace.

“I’d like that,” he strokes my cheek. “I’m excited to introduce you to everyone tonight.”

“That makes one of us.”

“YN I promise there’s nothing to be nervous about. They already love you because they know you’re the reason I’ve been so…me.”

I swallow the ball of emotion in my chest. We were both just us around each other. No fuss, no pretending. Just us. It wasn’t something I could share with my own family, they barely knew what I was really like. Harry had met my parents separately when they were in town a couple months ago. They’d liked him, but they also liked Ethan so it wasn’t saying much.

“I trust you,” I hold his face in my hands. “Fine.”

“Good,” his hand rubs my back. He pulls me into his chest, crushing me against him until the coffee goes off.

“Thanks love,” Harry says as I hand him a mug.

We chat about nothing as we take our coffees to the couch where we sit snuggled. I feel safe here, it’s a good feeling, a feeling that felt so overwhelmingly new sometimes that it made me want to cry. Which always made Harry laugh.

“I can’t wait to spend this new year together,” I tell him.

“Me too,” his lips press softly onto my temple. “I’m finally excited about the future. I’m doing a job I like and dating a woman I love.”

“I’m happy for us.” I smile up at him.

We sit snuggled on the couch as we sip our morning coffee. I savour everything about this moment.

With Harry life was stable, it was good. I knew I would never pick up my phone and find a text so life-shattering like the ex-text had done to me; I know it was impossible to predict the future but somehow I could tell you that I had a good feeling about it.

———————————

TAGLIST: @tiaamberxx @cherryshouse

#harry styles fic #writingsfromhome #harry styles #harry styles x reader #harry styles fanfic #harry styles imagine #fic #harry styles fluff #harry styles series #harry styles angst #harry stylesxreader #series #i didn’t really know where this one was going lol #but I am also feeling lazy to edit so dont mind #sorry in advance if this isn’t the ending you wanted lol #road trip

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halehxosman · 3 months ago

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From the moment their mom had become ill Haleh had been in fight mode. It was not easy, not had she felt confident in much of the decisions she'd had to make or help their mom make, but she had not shied away from any of it. At this point though, she wondered if she had been in fight mode so long, she couldn't stop. It felt like the second she let her guard down, let someone help her, admit how she was really feeling, her world would crash and burn. Even now that it felt like an inevitability that their mother would not last much longer, she had to keep fighting. If she stopped, it was like she was surrendering to loosing her only present parent. Like she was giving up on her.. And also, as if her sacrifices had been for nothing. Because she hadn't been able to keep her alive and save her. Maybe she was being a bitch. Maybe she was stupid for not asking for help the second their mom had her first episode. She didn't doubt that Evren would have done all he could to be there. At least for their mom. For her? She wasn't all that sure.

She caught his eye, nodding in response. Their mom wasn't that kind of parent. The kind that would withdraw love in the face of a disagreement or fight. All her disapproving meant was that she wanted them to make good choices. Worried about their safety and their future. Given where his choices had landed him, she could see how he'd feel like that. "I think she just didn't understand it. And it all made her worry a lot. I'd be in the middle of a conversation with her on the phone, and she would halt it and ask me if I thought you were okay. If I thought you could handle a child on top of everything else you were dealing with." Perhaps for the first time tonight she piced her words carefully, threading more lightly than she normally would have. She could have said more, included her own opinion or musings on what it might be like to be a parent watching your kids grow into adults and make life changing decisions without seeking your approval, or wanting your opinion. At the end of the day, to your parent you would always be their child. And they wanted to protect you, from the world sure but also from yourself. "Yeah. I'll add you to the google calendar and text you the date and time." she assented. The longer she sat still in this car, the more exhausted she felt. A headache was beginning to brew at the back of her head, the need to be able to lie down and sleep increasing.

"It was implied." She argued, once more masking her hurt with anger, his words having shook her back out of the lull she had almost given into. Damn proof that allowing her guard to lower would swiftly be regretted. Though she also didn't have it in her to grovel and apologize over and over. She hadn't asked for forgiveness for a reason. it wasn't deserved and it was not as if she'd feel any less guilty if she did so. This type of omission of the truth was not the kind you lived down. Maybe she didn't deserve to either. Seven months.. God did she have to break this to him too. "I don't think she has that long Evren." Her chest constricted painfully as she spoke, having to almost force the words out. Fisting her hands in her lap, fighting the tears that with no warning was threatening to flow out. A few forced deep breaths were taken before she was able to meet his gaze. "I'll call you right away. I promise." Wanting to reassure him, knowing it was the last thing she could do given the situation she had put them in, Haleh tentatively reached over to place her hand on top of his for a brief moment. Her fingers folding around his and applying some gentle pressure.

The fact that he chose not to argue with her had her slump back against the seat, her muscles beginning to fully relax as the conversation did in fact seem to be coming to a close. And then her not all there mind zeroed in on 'I have my own reasons for that', and she was scoffing all over again, wanting to errupt all over again. To avoid it, she quickly reached for the door handle, all but kicking the car door open in her haste to get out before she said some more shit she couldn't take back. "Right." her tone clipped, before sliding out and using her elbow to shut the stupid door. "Would fucking love to know what those are.. what the hell did I do wrong.." she muttered to herself, wobbling a little. Haleh had barely taken two steps before instant panic seized her. Where was her phone? Rummaging trough her purse with one hand, and coming up empty, she patted her jacket pockets, head spinning when it wasn't there. She all but ran around the car to Evren. "I can't find my phone. Shit. Shit! It has all of moms important numbers and if anything happens and I don't pick up.." With shaking hands she thrust her purse at him. "Please tell me its in there. I'm blind and its at the bottom, right?" Her hands went to her temples, pressing back her hair as she barely dared look at him trying to find it.

Evren honestly couldn’t imagine all the work and stuff Haleh had put into all of this. The sleepless nights, the numerous doctor’s appointments, the endless alarms set for medications; it was too much for anyone to handle much less someone in Haleh or Evren’s situation with no sort of medical background. It was something he’d never thought about before - likely because he’d never been in this situation before - but in this moment, now that he’d lay it all out, thinking about it, Haleh was a hell of a lot stronger than he was. There was no way he could’ve given up a life he wanted for something like this. Or at least that’s what he would’ve said if you’d asked him several years ago, but, this version of Evren - the one that had matured just slightly over the last few years - would’ve done it in a heartbeat, especially for someone like Haleh or his mother. And even though he still didn’t approve of Haleh’s choices, at least he had a better understanding as to why; and he couldn’t judge her for that.

“I’ve never doubted that she didn’t love me.” Evren spoke, shaking his head as he looked over at her for a moment, turning his attention towards the traffic around them before turning onto his street. “I guess I just assumed she was disappointed in me.” he said out loud not quite having realized he’d done such. It wasn’t a lie, that had been the biggest reason he’d been so distant with his family to begin with. Because as hard as being apart from them had been, at least it was his choice. He wasn’t so sure he’d have been as comfortable with the thought of giving them the opportunity to turn away from him instead. Sure, it didn’t make a lot of sense, but Evren never claimed to have common sense. “Just - whenever you’re more sober I’ll figure out when mom’s next appointment is and I’ll be there.” he spoke. He was unsure if their mom would be upset with Haleh for telling him, unsure if she’d even welcome him after his distance for all these years but he had told Haleh he’d try and he was willing to do that. After all, who knew how long their mother had with them at this point anyways.. It didn’t sound great if you asked him.

The accusatory tone that escaped his sister’s lips wasn’t a shock; he had just accused her of waiting until he was too late to tell him. And no, the question hadn’t been fair but he was trying to be better about speaking his mind, even if it wasn’t nice. Exhaling exhaustingly he shook his head, his gaze meeting Haleh’s as they sat at the entrance to the trailer park, waiting for traffic to slow down for him to turn in. “That’s not what I said Haleh..” he paused, gripping the steering wheel again. Okay, sure, maybe his statement had come across as making it sound like she had no intention of telling him until their mother was dead and gone. And he knew that wasn’t fair. He may not agree with her choices, but when it came to their mother Haleh would’ve never let it get that far. He knew better than that. But that didn’t make it sting any less that he had to found out months later; and while he couldn’t blame anyone but himself for why, it certainly didn’t make it hurt any less. “I just-” he paused, shaking his head as he was unable to finish his thought, finish his sentence. It wasn’t important. All that was important was that he knew now. Maybe he could have this part of the conversation with her later when they were both more sober. “Can you at least promise me that from here on out the second anything happens you’ll call me right away?” he asked. “I don’t want to find out seven months from now she had another heart attack. If things are as bad as they seem I -” he paused, looking at her for a moment, parking his car in the driveway of his trailer, but left the car running once it was parked. He was too afraid the conversation would end if he were to go inside. He listened, letting her blame his absenteeism on why he hadn’t been informed or in the know of anything before; that was fair. But if the roles were reversed, he’d have told her immediately; their mom would’ve rather them deal with this together than not at all. So instead of arguing - there was no point, she was hurt by his actions and it was valid - he nodded. “I know.” he replied. “I know I haven’t been there, and I have my own reasons for that, but, like you said the important thing now is that I do know. And I can be there however I’m needed.” @halehxosman

#evren.#convo.#c. evren01 #( x. living a life thats not her own ;; haleh )

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0anonnymouslyours0 · 2 years ago

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you are perfect - joseph quinn

warnings / description: this was requested by @kellysimagines!! joseph!quinn x female!reader. req: joe and the reader have been together since s4 shooting, and they're in brazil with jamie at a meet and greet. reader gets insecure because there are so many pretty girls, she feels insecure of her chest size. warnings: fighting, insecure/jealous reader, kissing, titty sucking ..

"y/n! joe! look over here at the camera!"

"can we get your autograph!"

"what was it like acting in stranger things with each other?"

"how long have you guys been dating?"

you blink twice, feeling the pressure of hundreds of eyes watching you. you knew the press tours were going to be busy, but you weren't excepting them to be quite this stressful. you stood next to joe and jamie on the podium, answering questions, signing various items and taking pictures with fans.

you glanced at the queue of girls that had formed next to joe, all wanting to take a picture with him. they were all so beautiful. there hair was all perfectly done, make up flawless, beautiful figures. one girl stepped up, next in line to take a photo with joe. she had a small black crop top on, cleavage on full display. you glanced down at your own chest, cheeks heating. you had always been a little self-conscious about your chest size. now dating joe, you were even more aware, because of the thousands of beautiful girls who threw themselves at him daily.

"y/n? can i get your autograph? i'm a big fan of your work." a girl said, smiling at you.

you exhaled quickly, before smiling at her brightly. you needed to focus your attention on your own fans, and the meet and greet, not your insecurities.

"of course!" you replied.

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the meet and greet had finished a couple hours ago. you had gone back to your hotel, exhausted. joe had gone out with jamie, seeming to have much more energy then you. you scrolled through instagram. there were a few posts about todays meet and greet, along with photos of girls smiling next to joe, or looking up at him with large doe eyes. you frowned, when you came across a picture of the same girl you saw earlier. the feeling of self consciousness came over you again. you clicked away from the picture, shaking your head. then you got an idea. you googled the best plastic surgeons in brazil, taking a screenshot of the results. this way you could be just as beautiful as those girls, beautiful for joe.

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"hey love! im home!"

"joe!" you said hugging him as he walked into your room.

"how was your time with jamie?"

"yeah fun- got bombarded by paparazzi though." he said placing a kiss on your cheek.

"thats a shame." you said, frowning.

"yeah- oh that reminds me, do you have that photo of us at the event today?"

"yeah its on my phone, just send it to yourself." you said handing him the phone, before laying back down on your bed.

he nodded, walking of to find his phone in the other room.

"y/n? that the hell is this?" joe called angrily.

you sat up quickly, racking your brain for what he could of seen. there was nothing weird- was there?

oh.

the screen shot of the plastic surgeons. joe came in, brandishing the phone in front of your face.

"why are you looking at plastic surgeons?" he asked, dropping the phone on the bed.

"i- i'm not sure.."

"don't lie."

"i was thinking about getting.. um a surgery."

"why would you do that?"

you felt tears brimming. you hated fighting with him. you hated that you were so insecure about this. it was just pathetic.

"i wanted to.. to be pretty for you."

he face immediately relaxed, a frown forming on his brow.

"oh honey, you're so pretty."

he sat down next to you, pulling you into a hug. he pulled away kissing you while cupping your cheeks.

"you are so pretty baby. you don't need anything changed."

he kissed down your jawline, his hands coming up to fiddle with the strings of your top. he pulled your top down, and it pooled at your waist. he moved back to your face, kissing your mouth. you moaned, as his hands unexpectedly came up to grab your breasts roughly.

"you are so pretty. so so pretty." he whispered into your ear.

he unclasped your bra, throwing it across the room. he kissed down along your collarbone. you chest heaved as his lips closed around your nipple. he ran his tongue around it. a groan escaped his mouth, vibrating along your skin. you arched your back, giving him more access. you moaned as you delivered a quick bite to the skin. he moved to your other breast, repeating the seem motions. he kissed back up to your chin, hands cupping your breasts. he kissed you, leaning back and grinning stupidly.

"don't ever change anything about you. you are perfect."

this took forever. also tysm for 160 followers !! i feel so lucky :) i also had a crisis halfway through writing this and kept spelling his name joeseph?

#stranger things #female reader #oneshot #fluff #st4 #smut #eddie munson #masterlist #joseph quinn smut #joseph quinn #joseph quinn x reader #joseph quinn fanfiction #joseph quinn stranger things #joseph quinn x you #joe quinn #stranger things cast #eddie my beloved

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sugawarassoccerlover · 2 years ago

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a/n: very self indulgent thing because life is shit im tired god I need a hug warnings: depression, burnout, suicidal thoughts, suicidal ideation(everyones fine, no one dies), crying, angst genre: angst to hurt/comfort pairing: Sugawara x gn!reader

you had been barely making your way though the past week. you pushed through conversations and interactions with other people, trying your best to not concern your friends about your mental state. especially not Koushi. he's an ideal boyfriend, perceptive, caring, sweet, generous, sympathetic, and kind. however, lately you've been feeling as if you'd been taking advantage of those characteristics of his, and you felt awful for it.

so you were starting to do "better". journaling instead of venting to him, drawing on your arm or crying in your room instead of crying in his arms. going to your pet instead of going to him. not to say that you didn't spend time with him, you'd go on dates or just hang out with him if he asked, but no time was spent concerning you.

you did what was necessary, even more than what was necessary actually. you planned for the next school year, went to work and did everything that was asked of you, helped your friends and family with their jobs, their problems, and helped them plan their own weeks. you babysat for some friends and family members when asked, and even ran errands for others.

not to mention in your family, you had to be the parent. you had to mediate and calm things down when things when wrong. you had to care for your siblings when something was happening. you had to control and handle the conversation with your parents if anything were to be accomplished.

though you kept yourself busy, nothing ever really stood out to you, each day feeling bland by the end of it. you never knew what day it was, or how much time had passed, time just stopped feeling real. you were getting tired. exhausted even. what went from helping out occasionally turned into giving your own life to be at everyone's beck and call. you rarely had time for yourself, not that you cared. however, everything you had been doing started to catch up with you.

you found yourself laying in bed one... what day was it? Saturday maybe? not that it mattered anymore. you were so tired, so done. you knew you were being used, and you were sick of it, but you didnt know how to put your foot down. you felt like you'd be a terrible friend or person in general if you ever told anyone know. as you started to go in a downward spiral of feeling trapped, a frighteningly satisfying thought popped up in your mind. you could just end it.

no one ever requires anything of a dead person. the more you thought about it, the more you felt as if it was necessary. you didn't even feel sad, no remorse, no fear, just exhaustion. you wanted to be done with this. with life. sighing, you thought to yourself how pitiful you were. you were going to end it over being tired. you cursed yourself. weak, stupid, idiot. how come people can handle more pressure than me? oh well. you wouldn't have to think about it for too long. just keep going, maybe even enjoy yourself until you're gone. you thought you'd give yourself maybe a day or two.

"y/n?" came your boyfriend's voice from the hallway of your apartment. you nearly forgot you had given him your apartment key, so that must have been how he got in.

oh shit.

you cleared your throat. "oh hey babe!"

"I've called your name like seven times now, are you alright?" Koushi frowned as he stepped in your room.

he looked... nice. did he prep himself up for something?

"oh yeah, I'm good, just tired," you forced a smile.

"just tired? darling I sent you text reminders of our date and you didnt even read them." you froze. "our date"?. shit. shit shit shit.

"I'm so sorry," your voice broke, emotions you had kept inside beginning to bubble to the surface.

"it's alright, don't worry about that, i just want to make sure you're okay." Koushi smiled warmly, taking a seat on the edge of your bed.

tears pricked at the corners of your eyes. you completely forgot about your date, therefore didnt bother to get ready, didn't even respond to your boyfriend, but he's concerned for you? shouldn't he be mad?

"love, you look like you're about to cry," his eyes softened. "what's wrong?"

you bit your lip, avoiding eye contact with him. you'd spent all this time making sure you wouldnt bother your boyfriend, yet here you were. you forgot about the date and now you were going to cry in front of him. what a way to fail.

it started with only one tear falling down your cheek, but the next thing you knew, you were sobbing. Koushi's eyes widened. he moved closer to you, holding your face in his hands and wiping your tears away with the pads of his thumbs. his heart shattered at the sight of you so distraught.

"hey, what's wrong?" he asked softly.

you desperately looked at him for a moment, before another sob escaped your lips and your face fell into the crook of his neck. Koushi wrapped his arms around your back, pulling you closer. one arm came up to carefully cradle your head. He quietly shushed you, gently almost like a child. he pressed soft, comforting kisses to the side of your head as you continued to sob.

"I'm here now, baby," he whispered, beginning to trace shapes into your back. "I'm here. you can let it out."

it didn't take long for Koushi's comforting mannerisms to have you calmed down to sniffles.

"I'm sorry," you whimpered. "I ruined our date, I'm so sorry."

he pulled away from you for a moment, to place his hands on the sides of your face, making you look at him. "hey. its okay. I don't want you to feel bad about that, alright? I'm not upset. I just want to make sure you're okay." he gently stroked your tear stained cheek with his thumb. "so please, tell me what's wrong."

you took a shaky breath as you tried to collect yourself. "I don't... um. its, a lot." you looked down, tears re-forming in your eyes.

the grey haired man grabbed your chin, saying softly. "it's alright. I want to hear all of it, no matter how long it takes, okay? this is what I'm here for, baby."

his words made all the emotions bubble up again. you were going to end your life soon, but here you were, worrying your boyfriend. tears pooled in your eyes as you made tentative eye contact with the former setter. looking at you, Koushi realized your gaze was so... hopeless? empty? it seemed as if there was so much behind that gaze but also almost nothing at all. he felt a sinking feeling rise in the pit of his stomach. he didn't want to jump to conclusions or freak out over a hunch, but he wanted to make sure you're okay.

"babe. are you..." he trailed off, not sure what to say or how to ask. "are you safe?"

you froze. "what d'you mean?"

Koushi breathed deeply. "I mean are you... you don't plan on doing anything do you?"

cue sobbing session #2. you didn't want it to get to this point. you never did. you barely noticed Koushi carefully scooping you up into his lap, holding you close. he himself nearly wanted to cry, seeing you so hurt, so broken like this without him knowing. he buried his nose in your hair while he traced shapes into your back with his fingers.

"I'm so tired Ko," you said through a hiccup. "I'm tired of being everyone's errand person." you were fumbling with your words but somehow your boyfriend understood you. "I'm tired of being everything for everyone when I can't be enough for myself, I just want to be done. I can't keep this up anymore."

you had put so much effort into keeping up an appearance of being alright and being sure that he wouldn't worry, but here you were a sobbing mess in Koushi's arms.

"baby it sounds like you're burnt out. you've been taking on way too much. I know you're capable and you love helping people, but you gotta look out for yourself too. you can't help everyone if you're only running on fumes," he wiped a few of your tears away with the pads of his thumbs. "you're allowed to rest you know."

"I just... I don't know how to stop, I don't know if I can stop but I can't keep going either." you hiccuped.

"let me help you then. how about we take today to give you a break? and then we can work on some things together, hm?" he offered.

"are you sure it's not a bother?" you asked quietly.

"love. I wanna be here for you. you can always come to me if you're feeling like this or if something happens. if you want space that's great too, but please angel," he paused to look at you. "please tell me if you need anything."

"thank you Koshi."

"anytime, y/n. I love you so much."

"I love you too."

Koushi pressed a soft, loving kiss to the tip of your nose before suggesting, "how about we take a nap, and then we can go to that bubble tea shop you love? after that we'll see what I can help you with."

you nodded.

a/n: idk how to end this lmao so yeah hope that was good, have a great day lovelies.

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kiyosamu · 3 years ago

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remember.

----♡----

pairing: rintaro suna x female reader.

genre: yandere, dark, light romance. // one shot, 4k words.

synopsis: abusive relationships can seem impossible to leave. when you open up to a classmate, your life takes a dramatic turn in the best and worst ways imaginable.

content warnings: assault, domestic abuse (not from suna), descriptions of violence, yandere themes.

----♡----

“hey, kid.” suna’s voice caught your attention as you passed by him in the university corridor. he was quiet, only speaking loud enough for you to hear right as you were walking by.

“hey, rintaro.” you stopped for a moment, refusing to look up at the tall man towering over you.

“i haven’t seen you in a while. everything okay?” he leaned against the wall and clutched a textbook to his chest. “you haven’t even been to class. kinda been missing my project partner.”

“you got my work though, right?” you asked him, partially covering your face with your hair. “i emailed it to you.”

“i did.”

“okay… good.” you cleared your throat, awkwardly shuffling and offering a suspiciously sudden goodbye.

“hey, wait-" suna grabbed your wrist to keep you from leaving. the small amount of pressure more than enough on your deep bruise to make you wince.

suna noticed your pained expression and immediately let go, stepping back.

“i’m sorry, i didn’t mean to hurt you. i just wanted to ask you if-“

“it’s okay!” you interrupted, knowing you’d already spoken to him for too long. you needed to get out of there before anyone noticed. “you didn’t hurt me. sorry, i have to go. bye!”

your behaviour was erratic. your speech was rushed; forced and strained with every word as you tried your best to appear normal.

unfortunately it was much harder to pretend everything was okay than you’d originally thought it’d be.

you quickly turned and headed down the hallway to drop off the assignments to your other professor. the last one you’d have to see for the day before heading home. you were almost there. so close you might not even run into him.

you’d hoped, anyway.

----♡----

after seeing your professor, you walked out into the fresh evening air. the cold stinging your cheeks and the wind pushing your hair out of your face.

your cheeks burned from the freezing air, but it was your black eye was that hurt the most.

“i’m sorry, i just lost my temper.” his words echoed in your head, “you shouldn’t have pissed me off.”

you nodded, essentially agreeing with him. it’s true, if he didn’t get mad, he wouldn’t have hit you. and why was he mad? because of something you did. so really, it was your own fault.

you were the one apologizing to him that night. doing anything you could to make it up to him. all of this with a deep purple bruise forming on your face.

when he finally left your dorm and went back to his, you were mentally exhausted. you fell asleep and woke up right before your second class of the day.

he had started forcing you to miss classes, to do everything at home and only go in to submit your work. this was for two reasons.

the first, you could spend more time with him due to your schedules. if yours was freed then you’d have more time together.

the second was to stop you from talking to other men. completely.

...and then he found out suna was your lab partner.

“i don’t want you working with him.”

“i have to. the professor is the one who chooses.”

“then work from home and submit the stuff online. that guy is a manipulator. he’s dangerous and will take advantage of you. i just know it.”

you’d never gotten that type of vibe from suna, but you obeyed your boyfriend because you didn’t want to know what would happen if you didn’t.

secretly, though, you missed class. you missed working with him. laughing, getting to know each other. he’d become a good friend over the past year and since you had the same majors, you two shared quite a few classes.

he was calm. funny and quiet, but definitely not timid. his energy made him come off tough, but not scary. if anything, he made you feel… safe.

just for those few hours you had together.

and whenever class would end, you found yourself missing that feeling.

----♡----

“i have to go to class tomorrow.” you said, refusing to make eye contact with your boyfriend who’d invited himself over to your dorm.

just like he does every. single. night.

“why? you gonna go talk to that suna guy?” he approached you, giving you a terrifying smile that you know wasn’t coming from a place of happiness.

“yuji… please.” your words were barely a whisper when you felt his fingers wrap around your throat. “my professor told me i need to start going. my grades are falling behind.”

his fingers tapped rhythmically against your skin. dancing skillfully as he toyed with the idea of choking you. you held your breath, expecting the worst.

“you should try harder.” he growled, digging his fingertips into your neck and you clenched your eyes closed. “get your grades back up so you don’t have to spend any more time with that guy.”

“okay, okay!” you grabbed onto his wrist and his eyes widened. “i will! i’ll get my grades up so i don’t need to see him anymore.”

“good girl.” he smiled, the evil expression he’d previously worn had melted away into a false image of a kind man. “always listening so well for me.”

yuji leaned in and kissed you. you kissed back, barely, but just enough for him to be satisfied and leave you alone.

“time for me to go.” he sighed as he heard the dorm advisor do a final walk through to knock on the doors and let the students know it was time for guests to leave.

“see you tomorrow?” he asked, tilting your chin up to look at him.

“sure…” you whispered. you trembled under his touch and wanted nothing more than for him to leave your sight.

“good. it’s a date.” he said happily and gave you another kiss, practically skipping down the hallway back to his own room.

you shut and locked your door, desperately wishing that was the last time you’d ever have to see him.

----♡----

“well, well, well.” suna cooed as you took your seat next to him. “as i live and breathe, i never thought i’d see the day. you finally made it to class.”

you nodded and pulled out your books.

“had to. my grades are slipping.” you sighed, looking around at the science classroom. “what are we doing today?”

“lab day.” suna said as he nudged an instruction sheet towards you. “should we put on our coats and get to it?”

“okay...”

you started to have an internal panic attack. your wrists were as bruised as the black eye you were hiding behind your hair.

suna stepped away to get your lab coats.

this would all be visible, and you didn’t want suna (or anyone) to see any of it.

you nervously approached your professor and she looked up at you with a disinterested stare.

“ma’am, i need to be excused from class today.”

“absolutely not.” she scoffed, “unless you want to fail my class, which i know you can’t afford to do, you’ll stay and do your lab.”

you opened your mouth to reply but she kept speaking.

“go put up your hair, roll up your sleeves and get your lab coat on. you should be thankful you have such a competent partner.” she crossed her arms, leaning back in her chair, “actually, i think the two of you should spend some time together. he’s my top student and you definitely need some tutoring.”

“i don’t think that’s necessary-“

“mr. suna, come up here please.”

suna walked up with a confused look, unsure as to why he was being brought in to the conversation.

“something i can help with?” he asked.

“yes,” the professor smiled, “i’d like the two of you to do tutoring sessions a minimum of twice a week, an hour each time. could you do that?”

“oh, sure. i don’t mind.” he smiled, “was that all? we should get to our assignment.”

you felt backed in to a wall. of course you were okay with this, you enjoyed spending time with suna.

unfortunately, you were terrified of the repercussions.

even worse, there was nothing you could do about it.

when you got back to your table, you put your hair up and silently thought of a plan. keep your head down, don’t make eye contact. maybe he wouldn’t notice.

you rolled up your sleeves and put on your white coat. it was barely long enough to hit your wrists, but did a decent job of hiding the bruises.

the first half of the lab went well. suna explained things in a way that made it easy to comprehend and you were genuinely enjoying yourself.

until you completely forgot.

you began to pour the green liquid into the tube. suna was writing his lab report when he looked up and noticed your mistake.

“oh, hey,” he stood up, putting his hand over yours to tilt the container back up. “you need to pour it slower, like this.”

when it started to pour just as he’d wanted, he let go and you found yourself missing the brief comfort of his touch.

“good job! you did it.” suna smiled and you looked up at him with an excited expression. finally. finally you were getting something right.

when the two of you made eye contact, his smile immediately dropped into a look of concern.

“what happened to your eye?”

“oh,” you stepped back, covering it with your hand. “i fell.”

suna carefully held onto your wrist and you winced in pain. his intentions were to move your hand away from your eye, but he took immediate notice of your reaction and pushed your sleeve down.

the bruises in the shape of fingerprints stained your skin a deep purple.

“what about here?” he stepped closer. you tried to read his expression but he looked completely emotionless.

“from the same fall, i’m just clumsy.”

“and your neck?”

suna pushed back your lab coat to see the same fingerprint bruises scattered around your neck.

you were suddenly thankful you’d chosen the table in the far back end of the classroom. nobody was ever watching.

“yeah.” you said, practically a whisper. “i’m just really clumsy.”

suna leaned down and looked into your eyes.

“why don’t i believe you?”

“five more minutes!” the professor called, interrupting your intense conversation and the two of you snapped back into action.

you finished your lab report and quickly packed up your stuff before rushing out the classroom door.

suna followed closely behind.

“it’s your boyfriend, isn’t it?”

you stopped dead in your tracks and turned around to look at him. suna’s expression was no longer emotionless. he was angry.

“okay,” you sighed, grabbing his wrist to pull him to a secluded space outside. the two of you sat down under a large tree, away from everyone else.

“yuji gets upset with me and… hurts me… sometimes.” you choked out. “i haven’t told anyone because i’m scared of what he’ll do to me. i haven’t left him because i’m scared of him. i’m stuck.”

you hadn’t said these words out loud to anyone, ever, and the way they were flowing so freely had you crying before you were even aware of it.

“please don’t tell anyo-“

“i’ll take care of it.”

you looked up at him. suna looked completely calm, his voice smooth and gaze held on you.

“what do you mean?”

suna stood up and ran his hands through his hair.

“i mean i’ll take care of it.” he smiled, “see you tomorrow afternoon for tutoring?”

“wait, suna-“

“later!” he gave you a passive wave before walking back towards the university building.

----♡----

that evening you waited for yuji to come by your dorm, but he never did.

you waited for him to call you, but he didn’t.

you worried about what suna had meant. maybe he was going to talk to him, maybe even threaten him. you’d hoped he wouldn’t do that, but you really didn’t know what he was capable of.

surely the rumours about him couldn’t be true. an honour's chemistry major being involved in a more sinister, underground group that nobody even knew if it was real or made up?

he was too nice. there was no way.

----♡----

after class you headed back to your dorm to get ready for your evening. suna had asked you to meet him under the same tree from the day before. around 7pm.

you debated on calling yuji, but ultimately decided against it. maybe he’d come to his senses. maybe he was remorseful, and just wanted to move on. to leave you alone and pretend your relationship never happened.

that was what you wished for the most.

----♡----

you stepped out into the cold evening air. the wind blowing softly and brushing the hair out of your face.

you clutched your books to your chest and took a short cut through the back fields separating the dorms from the main university campus.

you checked your phone, you were early. suna would be there in about 15 minutes.

you reached down to grab your phone when it was immediately snatched from your hands.

“you did this, didn’t you?” a familiar voice snapped at you. you glanced up to see yuji, sporting a similar black eye and a bandaged cut on his cheek.

“i- no, of course not!”

he rolled his eyes at your reply, clearly not willing to listen to a word you were saying. yuji grabbed your wrists, forcing you to drop your books and pushed you against the back wall of the university.

“you did. tell me right now. everything you said. who you said it to. and why.” the look in his eyes was horrifying. scarier than any other look he’s given you before.

this made it seem like his previous bouts of anger were nothing but minor inconveniences.

“i didn’t-“

yuji pulled back, immediately hitting your chin with a hard punch that knocked your head back into the concrete wall.

“try again.”

your vision was hazy. mind blurring memories together and you couldn’t even form a proper sentence.

you felt a warm, wet sensation cascading down the back of your neck and were immediately soothed by the feeling. the warmth was comfortable, even though you didn’t know what it was from.

yuji’s hand wrapped around your throat and he pressed his forehead to yours. his fingers dug roughly into your windpipe, causing you to choke out the remaining air in your lungs. you felt yourself get sleepy, closing your eyes and letting darkness overtake you as your body went limp.

----♡----

“hey, wake up.”

snapping fingers in your face had you looking around curiously. you couldn’t focus on your surroundings. it was unclear who was with you, unclear what was happening around you, and unclear why you were there.

the sounds of multiple men. grunting, panting. speaking quietly between deep breaths and harsh exertion.

what were they doing?

“hey.” the fingers snapped in front of your face again.

“what…” was all you could manage to say. your body felt heavy. weak. you were just so tired. all you wanted to do was fall asleep. you submitted to the exhaustion, closing your eyes again.

“don’t go to sleep.” a soothing voice lifted the back of your neck, pressing something soft against your head. “stay awake and listen to me.”

“ya like beatin’ up girls, huh?”

whack

“wanna put a girl half your size in the hospital, for what? to feel like more of a man?”

whack

“a real man would never hit a woman.”

whack

“a real man would beat the shit out of losers who do hit women, right ‘tsum?”

“right. maybe we’ll even put him in the hospital.”

whack

“oh, he’s gonna be there once we’re done.”

you finally recognized the last voice. it was suna.

he spoke again, his voice raspy and dark but still audible from where you were.

“i hope to fucking god you didn’t hurt her so badly that she’s knocked out…” suna trailed off and let out a small chuckle. “because there’s nothing i want more than for her to hear you cry like a little bitch when this blade goes right…”

the sound of yuji’s sudden scream was immediately muffled by what you were sure was the hand of the other man.

“…through you.”

your eyes widened and you were starting to understand what was happening.

all you could feel around you was danger.

you started to hyperventilate. panic was taking over.

“focus on me. come on, we need to get out of here.”

“who…” your head started to hurt now. badly.

“my name is osamu.” he bent down and cradled you in his arms, bringing you close to his chest and picking you up bridal style. “hold on to me if you can.”

“i’m scared…” you whispered.

“i know.” he murmured, carrying you away from the scene and back through the field. “i’ll keep you safe. we need to go to the hospital.”

“what about…”

“the only thing you need to worry about is stayin’ awake right now, okay? it’ll all be okay.” osamu’s voice was soothing. his body was warm and his strong arms supported your body in a way that made you never want to leave his hold.

you gave him a weak nod. even if you wanted to get away, you couldn’t. so you decided to trust in this man and hope for the best.

----♡----

“hey, sweetheart.” the calm voice of a nurse slowly woke you up. “you’re finally awake.”

“where…” you choked out, your throat was dry and you could barely make out where you were. it was all so… confusing.

“you’re in the hospital.” she said as she stood on her tiptoes to change the fluids on your iv pole. “you were assaulted. your injuries aren’t good but you’ll make a full recovery.”

the nurse leaned back down and held onto your hand. “you have a real knight in shining armour, you know. your boyfriend hasn’t left your side since you were admitted. he’s going to be so happy when he finds out you woke up.”

boyfriend?

your heart started to race at the thought of yuji coming in. you looked around, preparing for the worst when you heard footsteps enter the room.

“hey, sleepyhead.”

“speak of the devil.” the nurse smiled, giving your hand a squeeze. “i’ll let you two have some privacy. please press the call button if you need anything, i’ll come back and check on you soon.”

the footsteps grew closer and you heard the squeak of a chair being pulled up next to your bed. you opened your eyes to see suna giving you a compassionate smile.

“rintaro?” you whispered, “what are you doing here?”

“making sure you’re okay.” he crossed his arms, “been here since you were admitted.”

you tried your hardest to remember even coming to the hospital, but you just couldn’t. everything was gone after your head hit that wall.

“what… happened?” you asked, your eyes pleading for him to be honest.

“someone attacked you and your boyfriend.” suna leaned in, “do you not remember anything?”

“i remember yuji being upset with me…” you blinked, your mind working as hard as it could to remember something of importance. “my head hit the wall and it’s kind of fuzzy after that.”

“i see.” suna nodded.

“wait, how did you know i was in here?”

“some people mentioned an attack on campus. i got worried when you were late for our study session, and when your phone rang and you didn’t answer i felt like something was up.” he shrugged, taking a moment to think of his next words. “i called the hospital and asked if you were here, and then came right over when they confirmed it.”

“oh. okay…” you went to scratch an itch on your scalp and were met with searing pain at the slightest bit of pressure. “ow!”

“careful.” he smiled, taking your hand away from your head. “it’s gonna be sore for a while.”

“yeah…” you trailed off, trying to make sense of the situation. “what happened to yuji?”

“why do you care?”

“huh?” you glanced at suna who’s expression had turned sour.

“why do you care about what happened to him? he could've killed you.”

“i just wanted to know if he…” your voice was shaky and you tried to compose yourself. “if there was a possibility of him coming after me again.”

“not a single chance.” suna leaned over the railing of the hospital bed and took your hand. “besides, even if there was, i won’t let anything happen to you.”

----♡----

you’d found out yuji had suffered from severe injuries almost taking his life. he was beaten, stabbed, and his spinal cord suffered so much damage he was permanently paralyzed from the waist down.

while you were relieved the abuse would be over, you constantly wondered who had assaulted him.

you remembered telling suna and him saying he’d take care of it, surely that wasn’t him, right? there was no way suna could do something like that.

----♡----

months went by while you recovered from your injuries. you’d been discharged from the hospital after 3 weeks, and suna had stuck by your side every day.

“i’m happy to say you’ve essentially made a full recovery.” the doctor smiled, shaking your hand. “i’m so proud of your progress. you’re truly a walking miracle.”

“what about my memory?” you asked, “when will i remember what happened?”

“oh, you might not ever remember. you hit your head hard and from what we gather, you were unconscious.” the doctor stood up, clutching his clip board before walking out. “it’s probably for the best that you don’t remember what happened. you should focus on moving on, now. take care.”

----♡----

“well, should we celebrate?” suna asked as you walked out of the hospital together. you stopped, causing him to turn and look down at you. “what’s up?”

“i just wanted to say thank you…” you said, feeling your face getting hot. “i don’t think i could’ve done this without you.”

“you could’ve. you’re the strongest person i’ve ever met.” he leaned down, brushing the hair out of your face. the same hair that used to cover the deep bruises, now showing your true complexion. “and the most beautiful.”

you felt your heart flutter at his sudden compliment. suna’s hands found your waist and you instinctively draped your arms over his shoulders.

“you really mean that?” you asked, looking into his eyes.

“of course i do.” he smiled, leaning in to give you the long awaited kiss the two of you had been dying for. his lips were soft and you melted into his arms. he pulled away, resting his forehead on yours. “beautiful in every possible way.”

you felt tears well up as you were being complimented. the sweetest, kindest, most handsome man touching you so delicately and speaking to you with nothing but respect.

you'd completely fallen in love with him, and it was everything you ever could’ve asked for.

----♡----

a few weeks after the two of you made it official, your honeymoon phase was in full force. you couldn’t keep your hands off of each other. you were experiencing your first true relationship that made you feel loved and you cherished at every moment.

one evening, you decided to go to suna’s dorm to surprise him.

knock knock

“rintaro?” you called out, opening the door to let yourself in. “are you home?”

“in here, baby.” he replied from the kitchen. he was sharing an apartment style dorm with two other men, but you hadn’t met them yet. they weren’t ever there when you were.

“we finally get to meet your girl, huh?” one of them cooed as you walked in. he had dyed blonde hair and smirked at you as you walked by. “damn, she’s a looker, huh ‘samu?”

samu… why did that sound familiar?

“don’t be such a pig.” the other boy replied. you realized they were twins when he stood up and walked over to you. he smiled, holding out his hand. “nice to meet ya, i’m osamu.”

osamu.

no.

“my name is osamu…”

it couldn’t be.

“…hold on to me if you can.”

no, no, no.

the memories of the night of the assault came flooding back to you.

it only took a moment to realize...

...it wasn’t a random assault at all.

#suna drabble #rintaro suna #suna angst #rintaro suna angst #haikyuu angst #yandere haikyuu #yandere suna #yandere #haikyuu #suna #osamu miya #atsumu miya #miya twins #inarizaki angst #atsumu angst #osamu angst

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hyuckssunchip · 3 years ago

Text

idiosyncrasies

Pairings: Mark x Reader

Words: 1.6K

Warnings: Language (there is almost always language in my writings), angst

Synopsis:

Mark discovers just how much the little things mean to him. But it may be too little too late.

The ringing of the call seemed particularly droning today, echoing for what felt like eternity as you waited nervously on your bed.

It was automatic, the Pavlov effect earning your boyfriend a smile as his voice struggled through the line.

“Hey.”

“Hey.” Although you had dated for more than long enough, for some reason it came out shy and soft. Perhaps you were matching his mood, lackluster from his usual jovial self. But then again, it had been a while since you had seen that side of him.

“How are you?” You mumbled, cradling the phone as if it were going to break if you held it wrong.

“Fine. Just tired. We’ve been practicing nonstop for the show, just a lot of pressure you know?” You could imagine the way that he would run his hands through his hair, messing up the already frantic hair. “We’re all really tense.”

“You guys will do great, you always do. Just remember to take care of yourself. You’re more important than any one show.”

You were trying to console him, but you could tell it wasn’t working.

“Yeah, but this is important you know. It’s our US debut. It may not seem like a lot to you, but to us it’s huge.”

You bit your tongue, fighting for the right words to help but coming up with nothing.

He eventually broke the silence. “How are classes?”

“Fine I guess, with work and stuff I just feel like I don’t have enough hours in the day though. It doesn’t help that my professor’s decided all my midterms would be in the same week.” You straightened up as you stretched out your back.

“Can’t argue with that. I could use a few more hours in the day too.”

“I wouldn’t mind that, then we could call more often.” You bit your lip as the words slipped out, knowing that he would be able to hear the passive aggressive insinuation under your words.

“We call enough though.”

Your nose scrunched, “Mark you missed our last few calls.”

“And I’m busy, you know that. Especially now.”

“This isn’t what I signed up for.” You mumbled, mainly to yourself, but Mark heard it despite thousands of miles between you.

“It is. You knew that I came with the job, you said it was fine. You said you didn’t care.”

“No. I at least expected my boyfriend to call, or miss me.”

“I do miss you. All the time. But thousands of miles and tight schedules make it hard. You know that.”

You shook your head, brows furrowing. “I miss you so much that it physically aches me to not see or hear from you. Maybe it’s different for you, but because I love you I want to see you.”

“I love you too, but I just can’t see you all the time. Just because I can’t see or call you for one day doesn’t mean that I don’t love you anymore.”

“But it’s not just one day Mark. It’s days, weeks. Hell I don’t even know the last time I heard your voice before today.”

He sighed heavily on the other end.

“Look, I know you’re busy and exhausted. I get that. But so am I.” You let out a shaky breath, heart clenching as if you already knew what was coming.

“Don’t get started on you being tired.” He heaved, feeling irritated by the conversation, starting to lose his cool. “You don’t even know what being tired is like.”

Your jaw ticked, “I can get tired too. Don’t take away my pain just because you think your’s is more.”

“Well until you’re overworked until you collapse every night, I think it’s pretty clear where I stand.” Across the ocean Mark rubbed his hand over his face, exhausted beyond belief and just begging for sleep to overtake him. “What’s the point of this conversation? Are we just arguing for kicks? Cus I’m too tired for this. Let’s talk tomorrow.”

“Then what? Tomorrow turns into the day after, then the day after that, until it never happens?” Frustration was bubbling inside you, closing in on your tipping point. But it was closer than you liked to admit.

“Then get to the point.” He grunted, teeth grinding with annoyance.

Then you broke.

“I just want a normal relationship, with a normal guy that can do normal things with me. Is that too much to ask?” You cried out, emotions running rampant in your mind, overwhelming any logical thought that you had once had.

“If you want that so bad, what’s stopping you?” He growled on the other side of the line. “I sure as hell ain’t.”

The silence was devastating.

“Really?” Your voice was small and on the verge of breaking. Who knew what was holding you together still. You blinked back the tears bubbling at your eyes, blurring as you glanced at the picture on the desk. How did you two get here?

There was nothing to fill the silence until you realized that you were the only left on the phone.

Your throat tightened as you glanced at the blank phone, then back at the photo that seemed to be taunting you. Shaking your head in determination you flipped the frame over so that you couldn’t see the smiling faces anymore.

By the time that the morning arrived you had desperately tried to take back your decision. Mind running over the thought that that conversation could be the last you ever had with him.

A panicked daze had you hopelessly dialing his number.

But days passed, your calls went straight to voicemail. After the first few days you decided not to bother leaving messages, who knows if he was going to listen to them anyways.

There’s a threshold. For Mark it was three days.

Three days of nothing from you.

No calls, no texts, no trying.

You had officially given up.

And he was beyond the point of no return.

Mark let the door shut heavy behind him, hand searching in the dark for the light switch.

It took him longer than normal, lips pursing as he realized just how long it had been since he’d been here.

He shuffled forward, kicking off his shoes haphazardly, dragging his luggage to the bedroom. The moment that he entered he felt himself shiver at the cold atmosphere.

The door to the closet slid open, and he was met with a half empty closet, empty spots for hangers just waiting to be filled.

He sighed, closing it again, deciding that he could put his stuff away later.

His face contorted as he walked past the desk, halting as soon as he noticed the picture frame laying face down. With outstretched and tentative fingers he stood it back up, eyes flickering over your features.

His heart ached at the memories of the frozen moment, opting to turn it around so he didn’t have to think about it every time he passed the desk.

Mark headed to the kitchen, glancing at the way his shoes were still kicked to the side. His feet stopped on their own, head cocking as he felt himself move towards the pair, leaning down to set them straight.

He stepped back, staring at the lonely pair of shoes by the door, neat and tidy, something you had always nagged him about.

Now that he thought about it, it looked nice that way.

Again he trudged to the kitchen, pulling on the fridge door as he searched for water, grimacing at the nearly empty fridge, nothing but water and a couple of beers. It seemed incredibly bare without your containers of leftovers occupying the middle shelf.

The door fell shut silently as he pulled away, uncapping the bottle. He gulped with wide eyes, taking in the blank door.

The missing notes and lack of loopy handwriting making it seem so much more cold and rigid.

Mark averted his eyes, drawing his attention away from the differences that he couldn’t help but notice around the house.

Funny.

It’s funny how the things that had once irritated him gnawed a you shaped hole in his chest.

The way that his sweater had managed to make its way into your side of the closet.

The way that he would notice his toothpaste running low incredibly fast.

The way that you nagged at him to clean up after himself, claiming that you weren’t his mother, but doing it for him anyways.

Even the way that you would write those stupid little notes on the fridge. Those real embarrassing ones telling him that his boxers were clean and put away. Those ones where you confessed your love and he would quickly covered red faced when his friends came over. The ones that you simply doodled on.

He collapsed on the couch, rolling his head back as he stared at the ceiling.

It took him a few seconds to realize it, but he stood up in panic as he did.

It was gone.

The glow in the dark star you had stuck up there on the day that you had finally moved in with him. The one that had stayed with you both through thick in thin. Through petty fights and lovers quarrels, to moments of happiness and thrills of firsts with each other. Through everything, it was there.

But now it was gone.

It was as if it was the final nail in the coffin, the sudden realization that it was all so real. That it was really over.

Funny how you miss things when they’re gone.

#nct #nctcreations #cznnet #neowritingsnet #nct dream #nct 127 #nct scenerios #nct drabbles #nct imagines #nct mark #mark lee #nct angst #nct fluff #nct mark angst #nct mark fluff #mark angst #mark fluff #fool sun

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andypantsx3 · 4 years ago

Note

i could literally die right now + either deku or kirishima, andie u pick!

Surprise I picked not Deku because I was scared lmao.

Falling | Kirishima/Reader

Prompt: “I could literally die right now” Word Count: 1220 words Tags/Warnings: pro hero AU, fluff, SFW Notes: Thank you @bobawithpomegranate for beta reading!!

It had been ten minutes since the last time you had felt your arm.

It was currently wedged sideways between the door of the subway and a particularly sour looking salaryman, whose scowl was so intimidating you didn’t dare ask him to free up some space for you. Not that there was any space for him to shift into, as the entire car was packed like a sardine can.

You had no space to go either, balanced precariously over what looked like a college student dead asleep in his seat, wet locks of red hair spilling out from under the hood of his sweatshirt. This close, you could catch the lingering scent of some orange peel body wash, a welcome reprieve from the other smells that came with close train quarters.

He was cute, even with his features slack in sleep, a tiny scar over one eyelid, and looking bone-deep exhausted like he’d just come from an athletic meet. If the wet hair and telltale swell of muscle under his Crimson Riot hoodie was any judge, he probably had. Not that you had been staring long enough to speculate…

You were still looking—not staring—when the salaryman next to you shifted, and you felt the familiar prickle of blood flow returning to your arm. You wrenched your arm from between the man and the door—only to find that had been the only thing stabilizing you as the train lurched to a stop. You stumbled, hands grasping at the air in front of the salaryman. His eyes met yours, and in a moment that seemed to stretch for a small eternity, he moved minutely backwards.

Your hands clenched just short of the fabric of his suit and you tripped sideways.

Directly onto the lap of the sleeping student.

The sharp bone of his knee slammed into the side of your thigh as you went down, hard, your cheek stinging where it met the jut of his collarbone. You were frozen in shock for a moment, limbs locked up, before you were sliding sideways, angled towards the floor.

There was a startled snuffling noise, and a strong arm locked around your waist, hauling you back up against a hard chest.

You cringed, flushing all the way down to your toes. “Shit, I’m so sorry—”

You looked up, only for your tongue to freeze in your mouth. Looking up at you was not a sleeping college student. With his eyes open and a small grin bearing those trademark sharp teeth of his, you suddenly realized exactly who it was you were using as a seat—pro hero Red Riot.

Though he was fresh enough on the hero scene that it was possible for him to take the train like this without being recognized, you imagined it wouldn’t be long before that would have to stop. Though you knew little about heroes, even you knew he was rocketing up the ranks, fueled by his boyish charm, roguish good looks, and a frankly illegal set of washboard abs custom-made for magazine spreads.

Washboard abs that you could currently feel pressed up against the side of your arm.

Your brain rapidly entered panic mode and you tried to throw yourself sideways off of him, but Red Riot caught you again, laughing wryly.

“Careful there!” he said, “You almost ate floor. Wouldn’t want you to bang up that cute face of yours.”

Then he paused, seeming to realize what he’d said, a hint of a blush speckling his cheeks and the bridge of his nose. “Uh, I mean—”

Your brain went entirely offline as you gaped at him. Had he just tried to fan service you? How did he even know you knew who he was? Were you that obvious?

God this was so embarrassing.

“No, it’s okay!” you yelped, “You don’t need to apologize, I know my face isn’t actually—uh—you know. Anyway—thanks. Yeah, thanks for saving me, you—”

The crackle of the overheard interrupted you, the train conductor’s staticky voice announcing, “Ladies and gentlemen, I do apologize for the delay. We’ve got an obstruction on the track, we will be delayed just a short couple of minutes.”

Red Riot was staring at you through the announcement, a little wrinkle appearing between his brows. “What do you mean your face isn’t actually—? Actually what?”

Your entire face went hot. Oh my god, did he want to have this conversation? For real? You didn’t need reassurances, you needed to get off of his lap and disappear, stat. You wondered how feasible it was to pry open the doors and leap out into the subway tunnel, to disappear into the darkness and never be seen on the surface of the earth again.

That was the only solution here.

“This is so embarrassing, I could literally die right now,” you said instead, moving to clamber off of him. “I’m going to get off now, I’m sorry I fell on you.”

Red Riot’s arm clamped down, however, jerking you back against him. When you looked up at him, he seemed just as shocked as you were by the move.

“Sorry, reflex,” he said, shifting uncomfortably underneath you. It only emphasized the firmness of the muscles under you and you wondered frantically if the flames of your embarrassment might burn so hot that you would actually catch on fire.

The train conductor’s voice crackled back to life, “Ladies and gentleman, please don’t be alarmed. There is a fight taking place on the track and we have been asked to shelter in place. Please remain calm and stay in your seats, we will be passing along directions from the Public Safety Commission as they arrive.”

Red Riot perked up underneath you. “A fight! That’s my cue! I’m um, a hero—I don’t know if you’ve heard of me? I go by Red Riot...”

You nodded vaguely. He knew you knew, didn’t he? Why else would he have said the fan service thing…?

Red Riot smiled, another flash of those sharp teeth. Then he stood up abruptly, hefting you in his arms and whirling to place you gently down in his seat, still warm from his presence. Your face went impossibly hotter, a weird fire starting in your abdomen at the casual show of strength. You stared up at him with wide eyes.

Red Riot smiled again, then rummaged around in his pocket for something, movements rushed.

“I, um, don’t have a lot of time right now. Gotta get to the fight,” he said, producing a pen. You wondered what he was doing with it, until he took your hand, flipping your palm up.

The pen pressed into the skin of your palm and you thought for a moment that he was signing his autograph, until he capped it. “Don’t feel any pressure. Only if you want! I just thought I’d take a chance since it literally fell into my lap. I’ll, um, maybe see you later,” he said.

“If I don’t ‘literally die right now,’ that is,” he added, laughing.

And then he was gone, pushing through the crowd of people to get to the door of the train.

You looked down at your hand. In an untidy scrawl, he’d written:

Eijirou Kirishima

And underneath:

080-1XXX-5678. Date?

You covered your face, your cheeks burning. Oh yeah. You could literally die right now.

Current event masterlist in pinned.

#kirishima x reader #kirishima eijiro x reader #kirishima eijirou #bnha x reader #eijirou x reader #bnha todoroki #garbage fest 2021 #garbage fest fics

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animatedrapture · 4 years ago

Text

"𝖐𝖎𝖘𝖘 𝖒𝖊 𝖘𝖑𝖔𝖜𝖑𝖞" — suna rintarou ;

𝖘𝖚𝖒𝖒𝖆𝖗𝖞: suna rintarō is so much more than his bored eyes, the blunt between his lips, and his tendency to slack off—luckily, you're one of the very few people who know this; especially after he comes home to you sullen after finding out he didn't make it to the olympic players.

𝖙𝖆𝖌𝖘: female reader. fluff—established relationship. angst if you squint. comfort. mention of drug use. like, one swear word.

𝖜𝖔𝖗𝖉 𝖈𝖔𝖚𝖓𝖙: 2k

𝖛𝖎𝖔𝖑𝖊𝖙'𝖘 𝖓𝖔𝖙𝖊: in lieu of the influx of toxic stoner!suna content, i offer you a piece of appreciation towards him and all that he is. i was meaning to post this in my new blog but i thought there's so much of you here who would appreciate and need this more. written on a whim at 1AM and didn't proofread so for any errors, gomen. repost because tumblr tagging hates me. cross posted on ao3 under the same username. original post here. this was written before we got information that he actually made it to the olympic team. furudate really told me to stfu, huh?

It's you who find out first that there is truly so much more to Suna Rintarō than his expressionless exterior, sleepy eyes, and bored gaze towards even the most ridiculous situations. It's when his self assured stance dwindled as he walked towards you once upon a time, introducing himself first before asking you for your number.

"My number?" You echoed his request, trying your best not to gawk at his attractive features and six foot two stature towering over you so easily; making you feel oh so small. (Which is funny, given that you were already standing straight on your heels.)

"If you don't mind, 's cool if you say no," he replies, tearing his gaze from you as if he was actually anxious you'd say no.

It's funny, really. It's not every day a famous pro-athlete known for both his good looks and skills walk up to you, asking for your number and actually considering you'd say no to him and his pretty features—in fact, nevermind that he was pretty, it was more the fact that he wasn't so full of himself to actually think you wouldn't say no.

That's what makes you nod your head; your heart already beating right out of your chest as he gives you a lazy grin and his phone to press your number in. When you're done, you hand it back to him and you mentally pat yourself at the back for not visibly trembling.

"Y/N?" He reads your name from the contact information, and good God, did your name sound so beautiful coming out of his mouth. He doesn't wait for your reply anymore, looking back at you from his phone, the lazy smile still across his lips as if he knew it was a heart killer.

"Thanks, I'll text you later," is the last thing he said before he walked away from you.

It didn't take long for you to fall in love with someone like Suna Rintarō—underneath his detached personality also lied someone who was truly passionate with the things he set his mind to, gave his time to. Like you or volleyball or the video game he's been waiting to release for a whole month—it only had to be something or someone who was special enough, then, he would give it his all.

The smoke that filled his lungs occasionally did nothing to lessen your own intoxication of Suna Rintarō and his passions—because every exhale, his dark green eyes would meet yours and oh so easily, he offers you that same lazy smile yet one that was dripping with affection.

"Should you even be smoking that, Rintarō?" You had questioned him before, about the second time you've seen him put the rolled blunt in between his soft lips, inhaling it.

"It's a once in a while kinda thing, you don't actually think I'd sacrifice my career for this don'tcha?" He grins at you, amusement flooding his usually bored eyes — now glazed over with the effects of the weed—from the way he gazes at you with an eyebrow raised.

It's when you realize that Suna Rintarō was independent and knew what he was doing—did what he did with full awareness, full control, full flexibility. It's as if who he was in court was who he was in person as well.

"You're really interesting, y'know that Rin?" You had mumbled against his chest once before, it was at the first few months of dating—he had one of his arms around you with you cuddled on his side, watching a movie from his couch.

"Yeah?"

"I mean—you've always been so good at what you do, huh? But you still work for it."

"What makes you say that?" You can feel him looking down on face against his chest.

"C'mon, don't be silly. You were scouted at middle school and you only got better as you grew up!" You say, finally moving your head to meet his gaze.

But all you get is a flick on your forehead and his low chuckle, "'s not that deep, y/n," he answers.

But you already knew better.

Suna isn't one for words, and no matter how much you insist that he was beyond the description of words, he only rolls his narrowed eyes at you. You find out Suna Rintarō, your boyfriend, was a huge inspiration during your sixth month together when you finally met his little sister.

It's hard to say it wasn't amusing how snarky she was, just as he was to his friends whom you've met a few times before—Atsumu and Osamu Miya, you remember. She's quick with her tongue, easily retorting back to her brother's comments.

"Are you sure you didn't just pay Y/N-san to be your girlfriend, nii-san?"

"Nah, you still jealous I came out prettier than you?" Suna bites back, a teasing grin plastered across his face. His sister only scoffs, looking back at you.

"You can tell me if he blackmailed you to come here!" She attempts to whisper. You're not sure whether you should be worried or continue to laugh, but you do neither as you choke on the drink you were sipping on right as she told you this.

"Shit, Y/N," Suna curses as you cough, your throat burning at the drink's intrusion, but Suna's quick to rub soothingly against your back as he offers you his water, his eyes glazed over in panic.

"You okay?" He asks when you stopped coughing, and you nod in response—throat remaining slightly sore. Suna lets out an aggravated groan, "Be careful next time," he manages to scold you, but oddly enough, his words remain saccharine.

There's something about the way that his little sister doesn't seem the least bit surprised with his reaction that somehow lets you know that perhaps, Suna Rintarō might just be quite the caring brother behind closed doors.

After that, it was when Suna excused himself to take a call from his manager, leaving you with his sister.

"Hey, nee-san, promise you'll take care of Rin-nii? You won't break his heart, will you?" His sister asks, eyes gleaming with something akin to hope, expectation, wonder. It easily takes you by surprise.

"Don't you worry, I'll promise I'll take care of him, promise I won't break his heart," your voice easily softens, nodding. His little sister's gaze remains on you, as if she's assessing you and as if she would easily tell whether or not you meant the words that came out of your mouth.

It makes you hold a breath until she nods slowly, smiling at you lightly just as Suna comes walking back, eyebrows raised, knowing he must've missed something.

"Whatcha girls talkin' bout?" He asked as he slipped back on his seat beside you.

"None of your business, obviously," his sister quickly answers.

They're truly quite similar, it's enough to make you smile and get through meeting his little sister until both of you dropped her off back to the train station.

"What'd she tell you?" Suna nudged you after seeing her train leave.

"Nothing, Rin," you answered with a wide smile, leaning up to place a chaste kiss against his lips—yet just as you pull away, one of his hands has found its way behind your neck, pulling you back to him.

You never thought a kiss could feel so loving before—but it really seemed as if Suna Rintarō had a knack for proving you wrong, over and over again.

It was the day that the Olympic team was announced when you see so much more of Suna Rintarō. Quick like the blink of an eye, or lightning that leaves the thunder chasing it; Suna felt the exhaustion, the pressure, the burnt-out feeling that's been repressed in the back of his head. It comes to him, crashing down like boulders not just on his shoulders but weighing down every part of his body.

Did he lack somewhere? He wonders. Where did that lacking end and start? What could have he done? Was it training, where he spent most of his time now? Suna had end up seeing you less and less since the drafting of olympic players started and you've been nothing but patient.

What was he supposed to tell you? After all the time it has stolen away from you—that he didn't make it?

When he opened the door to your shared apartment, he doesn't look up at you with a relieved sigh as he usually would—he avoids you gaze entirely, he avoids your observing eyes from the couch you sat on, watching him slowly shrug his shoes off.

"I'm just gonn—" he started, about to make an excuse to avoid looking at you.

"Prepared your bath, Rin. C'mon," Suna hears you say but it doesn't sink in his head, watching you take his hand, leading him to the bathroom.

Suna remains silent as he looks down on the bath you prepared for him, warm and inviting.

"Meet me in the kitchen when you're done, okay?" He hears you say, followed by the echo of your footsteps walking away.

You easily understand that Suna Rintarō was more than his talents, his efforts, and every little thing about him when you feel his large arms wrapped around you, his broad chest pressed against your back and his face buried on the crook of your neck. His fresh scent right out of the shower engulfing you and invading your senses, flooding you with him.

"'m sorry, bunny," he mumbles.

"You have nothing to be sorry about, Ri—"

"It's odd, thought I'd pull it off, thought it'd be nothin' if I didn't make it. Don't know why I'm so upset right now," he continues, cutting you off, "Been so patient for me too, bunny. Thought I'd be nice to make you proud, ya know?"

Your sigh comes out sharp from the heavy feeling from your chest, not knowing what to do to make him feel better—like he did with you, always knowing his way around your low moments.

You wriggle out of his arms, making him grumble until you fully face him. He looks back at you with a small frown, eyebrows furrowed, watching your expression.

"I'm always proud of you, Rin. Olympic player or not, you make me so proud," you speak softly, your hands cupping each side of his face.

"Don't even get why it matters to me this much, it's just—" it was your turn to cut him off, tipping your toes to press a lingering kiss against his lips. Suna smiles against your lips, carrying you to sit on the kitchen counter like he always did—knowing you always would have to tip on your toes to reach him.

Soon, the lingering kiss turns slow and passionate—lips softly grazing the other, and it feels more like pouring the heavy weight of love out of your chest and into the other. A kiss so loving, so reassuring, so passionate—the kind that easily takes your breath away and makes your mind go blank. When Suna pulls away, he rests his forehead against yours, breathing heavily. You smile at him because it's all you can do when your heart feels like it's going to leap out of your throat just to offer itself to him entirely—and Suna smiles back at you, pecking your lips before wrapping his arms around you again, resting his chin on your shoulder.

You run your fingers through his hair, hoping it would help soothe him, and then you say, "I promise that you'll make it next year, Rin. I'll be with you now, and I'll still be with you then."

It only makes him hold you tighter, closer to him, "I love you, Y/N."

"I love you, Rintarō. You deserve the world and all the stars in the galaxy."

"'s too bad there's nothin' more I need than you, then."

That's what Suna tells you—Suna, who was smoke in his lungs, dumb videos of the twins to blackmail them with, little mistakes, bored eyes, and lazy attitude. The same Suna who was slow kisses, passion, and genuine smiles reserved for you—the same Suna who gave his passions his all, the same Suna who held you securely in his arms every night, the same Suna his little sister admired. Most of all, the same Suna Rintarō you loved with every beat of your heart, every fibre of your being.

📞 violet is calling... all content featured belongs to ©️ animatedrapture. do not plagiarize, repost, or modify.

#suna x reader #suna rintarou #haikyuu x reader #suna #haikyuu #suna rintaro x reader #haikyuu imagines #rintarou suna #suna fluff #haikyuu fluff #suna Rintarō #;cloud #IM SO PRESSED!!!#so anNOYED!!#GODDAMN HAD TO REPOST

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watchyourbluesturngolden · 3 years ago

Note

I'm OBSESSED w/the Howard Stern fic and I was wondering if you could write another interview w/ Howard like matbe it's the first interview after you had gone pubblic... there's a line in your fic “I remember though, at first we were all a little uncertain about her. She’s not exactly like the other women you have a history with"...just like building on that and "I just mean, we were used to seeing you with models and actresses.."where yn is introvert,normal grl who helped H w/his mentalhealth

first of all thank you so much 🥺 it means a lot to me that you liked that other fic that much! i changed your request a little bit because i honestly couldn't picture harry opening up this much in an interview with howard stern slkfjdslkfj but i hope you like it!

tysm to @ssacalumsg0lden for beta reading for me :)))))

zane lowe

warnings: mentions of bad relationships

word count: 1.6k

"So what have you been up to, Harry?" Zane asked, leaning his arm against the picnic table.

"You know, the usual. Some music stuff," Harry said. "But I'm also trying to spend a lot of time with my family and friends. It's so hard to do that when you're on tour or working on a new album, it kind of takes over your life. So I like to try and make sure to do that whenever I'm able to."

"That's good, it helps to stay grounded."

Harry nodded. "It's very easy, I think, to get swept away from your normal life. So I try to surround myself with the people I love as much as possible, for the sake of my sanity," he laughed.

"That's good, it's important to do that," Zane nodded. "Do you notice a positive change in your mood now that you do that?"

"I do, very much," Harry nodded, a light blush tinting his cheeks as he smiled. "I've... There's a few new people I've gotten very close with, and it's made me so much happier."

Harry was, of course, talking about you. His girlfriend of one year. The woman who had changed his life.

Harry knew his relationship with you was different than ones he'd had before. Before, relationships weren't relaxing. They weren't something that made him feel safe, or a space for him to unwind after a long day. They were just something else he had to expend energy on. He was always performing, always trying to make his girlfriend happy, even if that meant sacrificing his own sleep, or comfort, or happiness.

But with you, it was different. For once, he didn't have to be anyone except himself. He didn't have to force himself to stay at afterparties for hours and hours, drinking too much and talking to people he didn't really know. He didn't have to come home after a long day, only to get cleaned up and get ready to go out for a fancy dinner. He didn't have to fake anything, not with you. He could just... be. For the first time in his life, he felt like he could completely be himself, no changes needed.

He had never really been with an introvert before; his previous relationships were always go go go. The next party, the next after party, the next after after party. It was exhausting, if he was being honest. Of course he appreciated the opportunity to celebrate with his friends and meet new people, but sometimes he was just tired. He was tired of being Harry Styles, the pop star who parties constantly. Sometimes he just wanted to come home and decompress, talk to his girlfriend about his day, and ask about hers. He was tired of being on all the time.

Which is why he loved his relationship with you so much. With you, everything seemed easy. Since you were decidedly an introvert, the majority of your evenings with him were spent watching movies in either one of your living rooms. On the nights you did go out (usually suggested by Harry, because you would honestly be fine to stay in every night) you didn't go to extravagant gatherings or five star restaurants. You preferred to explore smaller local shops and cafes, or old book stores, or antique stores, or walk around in a park, or go for a picnic. Places where you and Harry could just be together, without the pressure of others around you.

Harry was happier than he'd ever been. He didn't realize exactly how tiring it was to go out every night until he stopped doing it.

At first though, you were a little concerned about his sudden change of habits. You worried he would begin to resent you for keeping him in every night, since you really weren't interested in going out. After you had been dating for about 2 months, you decided to ask him about it.

"Harry, if you want to go out and... get drinks with your friends, or just meet up with them, you can," you said encouragingly. "I don't want you to feel like you can't do anything just because I don't like going out, I promise I'm not going to be upset if you want to do stuff like that." You were a little shy speaking about this, because it had been an issue before. It's really hard to sustain a relationship when one half wants to go out and have fun every night, and the other just wants to stay in and watch Netflix.

His eyes widened a little and he shook his head. "That's not- I mean if you're sick of having me here..." his voice took on a teasing tone.

"Yeah, because the way I cuddle you constantly really makes it seem like I want you to leave," you rolled your eyes. "But I'm serious, I don't want you to feel like I'm keeping you from doing stuff."

"You don't," he said quickly. "I feel like in other relationships I’ve had, I had to be on all the time. I was ready to go out whenever, we would shut down every party, we were just running around constantly, and I... was so over it," he dropped his head against your shoulder, laughing. "I would so much rather stay in. I mean, I still like going out sometimes, but I really don't have any desire to be like that anymore. I felt like shit all the time because I was always hungover and sleep deprived. Also... I kind of felt like the only reason people wanted to be with me wasn't because they liked me, they just liked the idea of me. They liked the friends and connections I had, they liked the parties I could take them to. I felt... kind of used, I guess. I never felt like I could just be myself, because that's not why they wanted to be with me."

You frowned, bringing your hand up to run your fingers through his hair. "I'm so sorry, you didn't deserve that. I don't want you to feel like that anymore, okay? I want you to feel safe enough with me that you can just be yourself. And I really hope you know the reason I want to be with you. I want to be with you for you, not parties or connections or anything else."

You heard a quiet sniffle, and although his head was in your neck, you could tell he was crying.

"Baby, don't cry," you cooed soothingly, continuing to play with the little hairs at the back of his neck.

"I just... I love you," he said quietly. "And I know it's soon, but I do. I've never been more sure of anything. You don't have to say it back-"

"I love you too," you cut him off quietly. "Very, very much."

-----

Harry smiled as he thought back on that conversation. "Yeah. Definitely a positive change in my mood.

"I'm very glad to hear that," Zane said. "The right person can really change everything."

"They can," Harry agreed. "And that shows, in my music as well as my personal life. When I was writing Fine Line, I was having some of the lowest points of my life. Some of the highest too, but that just goes to show that I had no stability. I was just constantly up and down, thrown from super high highs to very low lows. I just felt... bad, a lot. But now I'm in a much better place, I think, and I think you can really hear that on this new record."

"Well, I'm very excited to hear it!" Zane smiled. "I think we all are."

"Thank you," Harry blushed. "There's a few songs on there that I'm very excited to share. Some very personal ones, so that's a little nerve wracking, but overall," he laughed lightly. "Overall I think they're some of my favorites that I've ever written."

"And are these songs about a certain person?"

"They are," Harry smiled. "She's the reason I'm in this better place. She's the reason I've been able to process so many of my emotions and put them into songs like this, so really she's the one you'll have to thank when the album comes out."

"She sounds wonderful," Zane smiled, looking out over the waves crashing on the shore.

"She is," Harry nodded, following the other man's gaze. "She's really... she's everything."

-----

"Harry, that was amazing," you grinned, launching yourself into his arms. The interview had concluded about an hour ago, and Harry just arrived home with takeout from the Chinese place you both loved.

"Thank you," he smiled, setting the bags down before he hugged you back. "Missed you, though."

"Missed you too." You leaned up to kiss him, but pulled away before it could go too far. "But I'm hungry. Let's eat?"

"Sure," he laughed, picking up the bags to bring them to the table. "Uh- I'm sorry if I said anything too personal, I didn't mean to take it so far. I was just thinking about how much I love you-"

"It's okay," you cut in. "I loved it, I promise it's okay."

"That's good," he leaned over to kiss your cheek. "I honestly had to hold myself back a lot, once i start talking about you it's hard to stop."

Your cheeks burned from the compliments, and you moved to return the tender gesture. "You're so sweet," you smiled. "But I'm, like, starving, so can we talk about this later?"

"Sure we can," Harry laughed. "Anything for you. You're everything."

#harry styles #harry styles/you fanfiction #harry styles x reader fanfiction #harry styles/reader fanfiction #harry styles x you fanfiction #harry styles/reader #harry styles/you #harry styles fanfiction #harry styles x you #harry styles x reader #harry styles x y/n

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baeklination · 3 years ago

Text

With My Favourite Ally

Date: 210923

Warnings: SMUT 🔞, a lot of general fucking, anal, mouth fucking (incl. gagging), sucking, fingering, water*1, eating out, buttplug, gen.expl.lang.

Pairing: Baekhyun x F. Reader

WC: 7,1k

NOTE: *1. Yes, people - we have a shower scene. 2. It's a bit on the rough side at times, so remember that things are said/done in - and with - love.

Masterlist

¤¤

"...so they closed it off, but if you take the exit just before that one you'll be okay", Gemma explains over the speaker.

"Yeah, okay. It should be on the GPS, I think. We wouldn't want to make a…"

"WRONG TURN!"

Too many times you've laughed at that joke - too many times you've seen that movie.

"Oh, wait, here he comes", you say, hearing the keys in the door. "Baekhyun..?"

"Yeah..?"

"Your GPS shows roadworks, right?"

"Yeah, sure. Hi", he says, giving you a quick kiss. "Do we have to take a different route?"

"Roadworks. Nothing cumbersome", Gemma assures him.

"Why can't you be friends with people who live in the city", Baekhyun jokes, speaking loudly for Fiona to hear.

"Hey, Baekhyun..! The ocean breeze will do you good, you'll see… So anyway, see you tomorrow? And remember you don't have to…"

A package of hard plastic lands on the table in front of you, flipping it around you raise your eyebrows and look at Baekhyun.

"...just come as you are."

"Yeah, sure. I'll call when we get there, let you know. Bye, Gem."

"Bye..!"

"A little small, no?"

Baekhyun takes a spoonful of your ice cream, shaking his head as he drags the spoon out.

"It's not for you, honey."

"Oh?"

"When you told me you were getting your nails done I felt kinda…"

"Ah, you felt kinda…", you smile at him.

"Yeah. And I thought I'd get an upgrade. You done with dinner?"

"You want to try it now? A size jump? What if it hurts tomorrow?"

He cradles your hand in his, kissing it and smiling mischievously.

"Is that how you felt when you met me..?"

Rolling eyes in head and tongue in mouth, you sigh at his cheek.

"Actually, you're right, Baekhyun. I can't wait."

"And then…", he says, getting to his knees in front of you, putting his hands on your thighs. "...we do it my way."

Baekhyun moans with delight when you press the circle against his hole, securing the plug.

"Can you move?"

"Now why…", he says, pulling you over him. "...are you treating me like a virgin? It's only bigger… Yes, I can move. Or were you hoping I wouldn't be able to..?"

He almost rips your zipper in two when he opens it, but without a care in the world for Maison, he continues to put his hand down your trousers. Twirling your panties around his hand, dragging them upwards, he teases your clit.

"Go change into something I like..?", he asks sweetly, planting juicy kisses on your lips. "Maybe...something black..? Do that for me?"

The way he asks, you'd wear any and every piece of clothing he likes… But also: the way he asks, what he likes may be in tatters by morning, so you don't pick from the high-end side. Giving him a dramatic twirl (mostly in jest) you show off your pick: a spaghetti-strapped mesh body - black.

"Good enough?"

He stops stroking himself, eagerly opening his arms when you join him on the bed - you in turn eagerly open your lips to his. They move delicately but hungrily on your mouth, matching his hands caressing your waist, thighs and rounding the curve of your ass, jiggling it.

"What's this?", he coos playfully, smacking you.

"Hey, I'm wearing a dress tomorrow. No marks", you remind him.

"The new one?"

"Yes. So don't-"

"Then your body's fine", he says and smacks your ass again. "This is fine.. Now be a good little wifey and lay down."

Placing himself behind you, his arm slides around your neck almost like a chokehold, but he keeps his hand firmly on your shoulder, grounding him.

Lifting your leg, he watches himself fuck you in the mirror, his dark eyes fixed on your stretched out pussy. He bites his lip, moaning as he rolls his now slick cock in and out.

"Move it…", he whispers deeply behind your ear, referring to the mesh covering you. "I want to see when you get swollen."

Baekhyun's not alone in enjoying the view; seeing yourself being filled by him adds a lewd layer to the act - one you've been partial to since the days you used to do it in front of his TV, for lack of a big mirror.

"This plug...mh…"

"Is it better..?"

"It's on my g-spot every time I push...and with your pussy around me…", he mumbles stickily, moving faster. "Ohh…"

You feel his entire range of motion with his length, curving up, getting thicker, lodging deep - in this position he even strokes just below your entrance when he slides in and out.

"And I thought I was the main event…", you moan, pressing on his back.

"You are my main event."

Letting go of your leg he closes his mouth around your breast, sucking and dragging his teeth over it, breathing salaciously. His saliva is stuck between the pattern of the mesh when he removes his mouth to pull it down, kissing roughly directly on your skin. Your fingers on his neck draws his attention to your mouth, where he buries his tongue deep, tasting every part of it and pushing his hand between your now closed legs and lets it rest in its tight fit as he thrusts hard into you from behind.

Moving back to kneel, he moves the skin on his cock over its head. When it glides over your tongue you taste yourself before his pre-cum eventually dominates the taste in your mouth. It doesn't take long for it to be clear he doesn't want a blowjob, not the way he's pushing his pelvis forward, steadying your head with a hand on the side of your face, so you stay still.

"Mmm...look at that…"

Throwing a glance at the mirror you're met by your puffed up cheeks trying to keep up with Baekhyun's cock.

"Ahh...look at that", he moans huskily, dropping his head back, grabbing his shaft tightly, squeezing a ring around it with his thumb and index, thrusting faster.

Your nose starts running along with your eyes. He ignores the small jerking of your body - he wants the big one. Blowing out air through your coughing, he gets it. You groan, catching your breath, and shake your head at him and his antics.

His hands are soft going down the sides of your face, as soft as soft as his chuckle and subsequent kiss on your temple before he straightens up, angling your head up to take him in your mouth again.

"Don't block me, honey", he demands in a sweet voice, juxtaposed to his wish to shove his cock down your throat.

Trying a slower approach, he lets you relax your jaw before letting him in, the head of his cock now just nudging down the rounded back of your mouth.

Even though tears have stopped gathering in your eyes from roughness, the slow pace means your larynx is blocked for a longer period, so you start feeling your chest - lungs - contract. Trying to match your breaths with his thrusts, you look up at him - the pout on his lips, tilted head and petting of your head tells you he knows exactly what's going on. For Baekhyun it's not about the sensation, not even about the gagging right now; he likes to know that his cock is lodged in your throat, that he has that kind of wife. Slipping his other hand behind your neck he pushes deep, making your muscles try to swallow him - literally. He groans and sucks in through his teeth, exhaling as he slides in again, his stomach pressing on your head.

"Breathe…", he hums, but knows it's gonna be impossible.

Not pulling out for even half a breath, he rolls his hips in quick succession, making you heave and pull back in no time. So, sitting back you glare at him - an act of complaint he adores. You turn sideways, pushing him away when he comes closer. When he tries to grab your hand you swat his away, but Baekhyun's fast; gripping your wrist before you can pull it back he bends your arm behind you. You lean forward to get away from the pain, enabling him to grab your other arm, essentially cuffing them on your back, pushing your head into the mattress. Sure, you could fight him - but do you really want to..?

Aggressively pulling your lingerie to the side he rams his cock into you.

"Ah...Ah", he growls with every hard thrust. "You think I can't see how wet you are?...Ah… Don't pretend you don't like it...Mh!"

Unintentionally, you moan, biting your lip when his groin smacks against you.

"That's it, honey...show me how you feel…", he continues, running his hand up your ass to your hip.

Taking his cock out, he flicks it back-and-forth over your anal, his breathing shaky - he's about to come. Moaning loudly as he slides back in, he lets go of your arms and holds your hips.

"Uh, fuck..!", he groans, as he rams his cock into you as fast as he can. "Shit, turn around… Uh, turn around..."

His speech is barely more than a huff. The moment you start, he pulls out, roughly grabbing your neck and pumps his cock.

"Aghh...aghh", he growls deeply, as his cum spurts over your face. "Ohhh... oh, shi…"

He crashes into the mattress knitting his brows, a necklace of sweat around his throat, glistening down between his pecs.

"Baekhyun..!", you whine, holding your hand out, keeping one eye shut tight.

Swinging his arm by the edge of the bed he comes up with his trousers in hand and gives them to you.

"Here..", he breathes hard, his stomach rising high.

After wiping his cum off, you tuck your hand under his thigh, but he's quick - so quick - to catch it.

"Don't even think about it…"

You bury your head in the covers, jokingly muttering he's no fun. He laughs, but cuts and jumps to a loud wail, again feeling how exhausted he is.

"How was it? I guess I don't have to ask, but..."

"How was it..?", he echoes, putting his hand on his cock. "I… Felt like the pressure of a goddamn fire hose went through me…", he says, rolling over, nuzzling your neck. "But you already know all about that, don't you?"

Sliding his hand between your legs, he glances up and sighs.

"I'll buy you a new one."

•

Whether it's because he feels he might've been a bit too rough or because he actually only has softness left, that's what you always get from him after this type of sex.

Pulling you down to sit on his lap, you brush your teeth in sync, the shushushu filling the bathroom of your otherwise still apartment. Even being done before you he waits, biting his toothbrush between his teeth, resting his hand on your lower back.

The start of a relationship is usually where you do everything together, but the both of you having tiny bathrooms back then meant one at a time which years on turned into double sinks. If Baekhyun is home - if you are - you wash up together. Not saying much, but together.

His stretched out arm is the airstrip personnel: "land here", which you gratefully do. The sheets are cold and make you shiver, but between pulling the covers and finding the warmth of his torso, you soon cosy on in.

"No ailments to report..?", he asks, stroking your arm.

"Nope", you shake your head on his chest. "I guess I'll see the final product tomorrow, but I shouldn't have any problems with the dress. But if I do…"

"If you do, huh..?", he smiles and tips your chin up for a kiss.

Musing for a second he starts giggling, his chest bobbing under your head.

"What?"

"Do you… Do you want me to dig up my old Halloween costume just to be safe? The mummy?"

With Baekhyun being such a dork, even laughing at his own lame jokes, how could you not follow suit?

"Pff, knowing you, you probably already have at least three dirty ideas about it…"

"I might. And knowing you…", he says, stretching to turn off the light."...you probably already have four."

Kissing you good night on the forehead he settles into the mattress with a faint grunt, like a thud in his throat, wrapping his arms tighter around you.

•

You're woken up by Baekhyun's knuckles gracing your ass.

"I know you're not thinking about putting your dick in me before saying good morning…", you mumble, drunk with sleep, not even opening your eyes.

"Never, ma'am", he whispers, keeping his laughter in his throat.

After some shifting, rustling and cool air hitting your back you feel his palm on your cheek, pulling it up. He places a soft kiss on your entrance, following with a few licks, and another kiss.

"Good morning."

"No, stay", you urge, trying to put your hand on his head under the covers.

He tsks when he comes up, pulling your lower body closer.

"I tagged you first. Besides…", he says, pushing the head of his cock into you. "...you'll barely notice, sleepy head."

Not yet wet, the spit on his cock helps, but doesn't provide the same sensuous glide as the real deal, but he semi-waits patiently; only the shortest thrusts once he's lodged his cock in you. Stroking your thigh, your stomach, kissing your shoulder, lightly pinching your nipple between his fingers while your breast lays in his palm. When you place your hand over his and push your ass back he extends his range of motion - now with the sweet glide of your juice - pressing firmly against your body, almost pausing, with every thrust. Turning towards him you tangle your fingers in his hair and enjoy the deep taste of his tongue.

"I guess a good night really does bring a good morning", you smile.

"Then I think it's gonna be a very good morning", he whispers over your lips.

Contrary to increasing his speed, he pulls out altogether and rolls out of bed. Neither far nor long though; he just gets up to pull the curtain to the side. Not completely, just enough to let in more than the echo of light you had, the overcast sky notwithstanding. His naked silhouette is gorgeous against the sliver of daylight - overcast as it may be - shining behind him and as he comes back his wet cock sways with his footsteps.

You get on his lap the moment he sits down, pushing your pussy against his length.

"Sit on me", he whispers hoarsely against your neck, gripping the underside of your legs.

You press his cock harder against your clit, in your hand feeling exactly how turned on he is, and let it stroke you before raising yourself up - and sliding down. Being pushed, Baekhyun doesn't mind laying, barely keeping his hands on your waist, biting his lips, as you pound him.

His thickness feels good, there's no need to rush. The sensation of your entrance hugging around him when you slide up, as if not wanting to let go, the way it stretches when he fills you.

He hums and caresses your stomach with his thumbs, cocking his head.

"Are you trying to get me to breed you, mama..?"

"No…", you shake your head, dropping to his chest, smiling at his remark.

Wrapping his arms around you, light as feathers, he rounds his length deep inside.

"Then why are you working my cock like that, hm?", he asks softly in your hair.

"Cus it's what I like…"

"It's what you like..? Well if it's what you like…"

He lets you sit back up again, but holds your hips firmly above his body, and thrusts. Bracing with his feet he goes just like you did, precise and hard, purposefully hitting your spot to bring out your orgasm. Even behind all the layers of hunger in his eyes, love is evident; the way he looks to see that he pleases you, does it the way you like it even though his morning hard-on is telling him to F...you...up.

With so many years passed, nearly all insecurities about being on display are far gone; you freely touch yourself in front of him - for him. Sliding your palms up your nipples sends a spark to your core, so, wetting your fingers, you run them over your clit, a signal to Baekhyun to thrust faster. With that, he starts moaning, joining in with your heavy breaths and the wet claps from your bodies.

"Baby…", you moan, dropping your head back.

It's impossible not to move your body, make the smacking harder as your fingers work deliciously on your clit. Baekhyun has always loved his morning naughties, so you bite your lip, squeeze your breast and look at him, eyes fluttering.

"Make me come, honey…"

He shivers, then he grunts, and digs his fingers into you. His pounding vibrates all between your legs as his cock pierces you over and over, and it starts your legs stiffening. You tremble and rub harder, desperately keeping your hand in place despite your tense muscles until it hits; shaking, wailing, releasing more fluids on Baekhyun's cock, you come.

He waits patiently as you ride it out, slowly pushing in and out, enjoying the mess you've made on him. Sliding out, you slump down next to him.

"I should start breakfast…", you breathe heavily, pretending to get up.

Baekhyun's hand encircles your upper arm - with a little smack due to the sweaty impact - and he comes up close behind.

"You - wife - are not going anywhere", he huffs, and kneels behind you.

"Higher", you say looking back at him, when he aligns himself.

Laying down on your back, kissing your shoulder he coos:

"Higher?", and wets his finger, gently sliding it in your ass. "You mean here..?"

When you arch deeper he giggles against your back.

"Yeah, I think you mean...right...here…"

Dropping a big ball of spit on his fingers, he smears it over your hole and presses the smooth head of his cock in, taking his time.

"Ahh...ahh...", he moans with every thrust, getting closer to being fully inside you.

Putting his arm around your neck, the right hand holding your hip, he finds his tempo. Seeing your ass being pushed up with every slap from his crotch is the perfect compliment to his burning breath on your shoulder and the ohh's that roll off his tongue every other time he bottoms out.

Pushing in deep, he changes to pressing his elbows in the mattress, clasping his hands together in front of your chest. It's barely that the rest of his body moves, only his ass swinging up and down, pushing your spine together; it's times like these you wish for some kind of reflection, to see Baekhyun's glutes tightening, the curve of his ass down to the back of his equally taut thighs.

"Ah….hhh...hhh...", he breathes hard, a spray of saliva landing on your neck, and he continues. "...hhh...uh, uh, ah", grips your pelvis hard, ramming, heaving out air as he comes in shaky thrusts.

Slowing down, he bounces against your ass, pushes deep, pulling you towards him, moaning. Even after he's settled he sweeps the hair from your neck, kisses you and, humming, rolls his hips.

•

When he's finally ready to get going his embrace reveals his hard-on, so you stick your butt out, poking him.

"Fina-"

"Ooh, don't", he groans and holds you still.

You turn around and look at him, surprised by his odd response.

"I want it to go down", he says and chuckles. "It's 'cus I put the plug in…"

"You did..? That's why you were taking so long..!", you exclaim with a big smile. "Really? Did you really?"

"I did really", he says, mimicking your tone, kissing you over the brow. "It was easier when you did it…"

"Tense?"

"Mm-hm…", he nods, putting his shoes on. "But it's fi-ine now. Shit..."

Straightening himself up, he puts his hand over his bulge and bites his lip.

It's both sexy and sweet, knowing he has it in - and that he did it in part for you.

"Are you gonna be okay to drive?", you ask, trying not to laugh.

"I'll be fine, hun. And when we get there…", he says, lifting his brow with a smile.

•

After some initial gasping and groaning, Baekhyun managed to get used to sitting with the plug, and now, twenty minutes on, you don't pay it very much mind - except for the occasional realisation that the sexiest man you know is three feet away from you with a sex toy in his ass.

With not much traffic outside of the city, Baekhyun is free to let his fingertips caress the nape of your neck as you lean towards the window, into the warming sunlight.

"I really love fucking you in the ass in the morning…", he says languidly.

"You make it sound as if I usually say no…", you murmur.

"No", he says, weaving his fingers into yours, giving your hand a kiss before resting them on your thigh. "Not at all."

With such a picturesque atmosphere it's no wonder you doze off.

Baekhyun loves singing in the car and though he's dreadfully out of tune it makes you happy to see him happy; tapping his thumb on the steering wheel, swaying his head, feeling good.

"...gateun geudaen yeppeoyo-oh-oh-ooh..!"

"CHUAYO!"

"Oh, you're up."

"Mm…", you sigh drowsily. "What time is it?"

"Hm, ten to four."

"Oh, it felt more like an hour than fifteen."

"Did I wake you up too early this morning? Go back to sleep...", he says, stroking your head.

"I'm not tired anymore. I wasn't even to begin with, I think."

Why are men sexy when they drive? There's nothing inherently sexy about, yet they are. At least your man is…

Nonchalantly you place your hand between his legs. He doesn't say anything, merely grunts when he slides forward a bit, touching the corners of his mouth with his fingers. He quickly becomes stiff in your hand - partly thanks to his toy, you suspect - so you put your hand down his trousers. A nudge with your fingers and his cock stands straight up in his boxers, an appetising protrusion against your palm. His hand automatically finds your thigh, squeezing it, when you drag your nails over the rim of his head. Faintly bucking his groin, he looks in both the rearview- and side mirror.

"Take it out", he says, voice thick with lust.

Contrary to traffic safety regulations you slip under the top part of the belt and lean to his side. Not pulling his pants down means you can't access his entire length, but it's nonetheless a good mouthful. Baekhyun's cock still tastes of this morning's semen since you decided on showering on arrival, bringing up images of the morning as well.

"Agh…"

His fingers tip tap under the hem of your trousers, trying to slide in, grab your ass, but it's too tight, so he lets them rest where they are. His arousal amuses you, so you push him to the back of your throat.

"Mmm...", he groans, running his hand up your back. "Let's pull in at a rest stop…"

Releasing him, but pumping, you shake your head. Throwing a glance to the side he looks almost worried, running his hand along your neck, his thumb petting your earlobe.

"Why not..?"

Then he chuckles softly through his nose and manages to put at least half of his mouth on your lips while still watching the road.

"Is it too base for my baby? Hm..?"

"No, but it's too soon for my baby", you say and sit back, nodding towards his backside.

He grimaces and squeezes himself, letting go with a loud sigh and pulls his trousers up.

"I know… You're right."

"You'll thank me when we get there", you affirm and take his hand.

"Oh, I'll something you…"

•

"...are you sure? Oh, my god, I'm so sorry."

"It's o-kay, relax..!", Gemma assures you on the other end of the line. "It's not your fault the highway jammed up, and I much prefer to have you guys groomed and clean when you do get over here."

"Argh..! Yeah, I know, but aish… Whatever, okay. We'll hurry up and see you soon."

After making good time - not pulling in at a rest stop - the highway had suddenly become crammed with cars with little to no movement in forty-five minutes, leading to you having circa fifteen minutes until the party starts.

"What'd she say?", Baekhyun asks, hanging up your dress on the closet door.

"You know her, doesn't sweat a thing. I would've said the same thing, it's just different being on this side of things", you sigh, putting your hair in a bun. "It's okay if I don't wash it, right?"

"Oooh, baby, you're so dirty…", he jokes, putting his arms around you. "But if you want to, there's time. I don't want to hurt you, but I think it's time you knew…"

"What?", you squint your eyes at him.

"Gemma...has other friends to hang out with. She's been seeing them behind your ba-…"

"Oh, I knew it was gonna be some-..!", you holler and break free, continuing to undress. "I'll be fifteen minutes."

Wringing out the water from your hair you hear the woosh of the glass door sliding and get a chill on your body.

"Has it been fifteen minutes already?"

"Maybe ten…", he says, stepping in behind you, his cock swaying stiffly.

Grabbing the shower head from you, he lets the water drench his hair, run over his closed eyes, down his body. Combing his hair back and wiping his face he smiles cheekily and starts screwing the shower head off its hose. The water flows out concentrated but soft, like from a gardening hose, so partly covering it with his thumb he regulates the water's pressure and backs you into the corner.

"We've got time."

Feeling behind his balls your fingers meet the plug; you pull it out just an inch and slide it back. Baekhyun moans, enveloping his lips over yours.

"Finally…"

He doesn't have to tell you to spread your legs, you do it eagerly when he puts the water stream to your stomach and brings it downward. The first hit on your clit gets you up on your toes, gasping, pushing your pelvis out. Baekhyun giggles in your mouth and curls two fingers into you, at the same time spraying the water on your clit again. You moan, grabbing his neck - unsuccessfully trying to grind against it, while he fiercely fucks his fingers into you.

"That's my baby", he whispers, turned on by your whines in his ear.

You pull up the skin to reveal the most sensitive part of your clit and when he aims for it your muscles immediately contract, pushing your pelvis out even further. Your mouth hangs open as you claw at his neck, convulsing on his pounding hand, crying out in pained wails.

"Shh, baby", he laughs at your excessive volume, but flicks his fingers over your clit, making you jerk and whine all the more while you come down.

Offhandedly tossing the hose to the side, pressing close, he lifts your leg and slides his hand behind your head. Sucking roughly on your lips he caresses his cock against you, looking for your entrance. Finding it, he nudges the tip in, then rounds out and snaps his pelvis.

"Ah, fuck", you gasp, putting your arm around his shoulders for support.

Continuing snapping, he doesn't stop kissing you. They're both rough, both what you want.

"Now, about what happened in the car…", he coos, looking at you while ramming his cock as deep as he can.

"What..?", you gasp. "What happened..?"

He leans in again, his back becoming hunched with every new thrust as he quickens the tempo. He exhales in high-pitched moans coated in honey, telling of his desire for you.

Water sloshes on the floor when he gets new footing, digging his fingers into your ass, his face in your shoulder. His wet hair gets plastered to his - and your - skin. Pounding into you, yet moving you along with him, he whispers hoarsely:

"I'm your husband, you shouldn't deny me these things…"

Fighting to even catch your breath between the gasps, answering him is not a priority. Being on time isn't a priority - not having your shoulder blades ground to dust against the tiles isn't a priority.

His even-paced pants are interrupted by a deep-chested trembling and his precise smacking turns to rolling when he comes.

"Ah-h-h...ash… A-HH, A-HH, AH, fu…", he moans and cries into your neck, filling you with his cum.

He pushes so deep while riding it out you have to push his shoulders down in turn; he understands, goes a little easier, a little gentler each time, ending up slowly rolling while lavishing juicy kisses on your lips.

Puffs of the giggle through his nose tickle you over the lip and he slides his length out and look down, kicking in the water.

"Leave it…", you sigh, sliding down to the floor, when he bends to grab the hose. "I'll finish up showering from down here… Come. I'll take it out."

So, kneeling in front of you, he arches with a faint moan as you drag the plug out.

"Freedom…"

"Oh, 'cus I'm the one who told you to wear it then work yourself up…"

"You are the one who worked me up, hun", he reminds you, screwing the showerhead back on and giving it to you.

•

"Eh...I don't-"

"I know, but wait 'til you see it on", Baekhyun says, holding his finger up.

Taking his first option off, he pulls the second over his head. You cock your head, knitting your brows.

"Huh?"

"I know, right?", he smiles, holding out his arms.

"How has it done that?", you exclaim in surprise.

In his hand, this flowy silk shirt looked like a woman's blouse, particularly with the knit lace encircling its short sleeves, but on him it - he - looks suave and sexy in a casual way.

"I love it. Ugh… What… And it goes great with the pants."

"Right? Even if it's all black it's a little something, something. I'm just gonna", he says and grabs his watch from the nightstand. "You ready?"

"Technically, but hmm, I don't know… Feels like something's missing…", you muse, looking in the mirror.

"Feeling a little competitive..?", he teases, looking in the mirror behind you. "Didn't you bring earrings? The small gold ones?"

"Ah!"

He breathes in loudly, smacking his lips with a nod; you know him well enough to sigh and wait for his joke about being a top fashionista.

•

"Brubububruuu..!"

"We're not that late..!", you holler, refusing to accept Michael's impromptu trumpet work.

"I had my finger on the dial to Missing People - whow! Coming through with the fashions, bro'. Nice!", he roars when Baekhyun takes off his jacket.

"Aeh…", he sighs and helps you with yours like the gentleman he is. "I have to make an effort when the missus looks like this."

Waving at a few familiar faces, your attention is diverted when Gemma appears in the kitchen door, crossing her arms:

"Well, well... Look who decided to show up!"

You extend your arm, bottle of gin in hand.

"For being late", you grimace apologetically.

"...and you know it's all her fault", Baekhyun says, pointing his thumb at you.

"...since way back in school, I've known them", Gemma explains to one of her guests.

You're not the type of couple to hang on each other's arms the whole night, but being midway through your second drink your eyes keep travelling across the room to where Baekhyun is. There's something unusually alluring about the way he looks in that shirt, be it the thin fabric whispering about his body underneath, the lace hanging off his triceps when he takes a sip or the three buttons he left undone so you'd be "begging for me to take you round back", as he had put it before you left.

Catching you eye, he casually pours a glass of water, takes a sip and - not so accidentally - spills, the water running down his neck to his chest.

"Whow. Here...", Michael says, handing him some paper.

"Thanks."

After patting his neck dry he goes to his chest, opening another button to reach, casting an eye your way.

"Ah...ah...", he moans quietly, the soft, wet clapping matching him.

Unlike in the shower, his hands now hug your hips softly as he takes you from behind. His boxers - anchored around his thighs - grace the inside of your leg as he moves.

Needs knows no bounds so for now a house wall to lean against and an outdoor sofa to rest your leg on is as good as any bedroom.

"Don't look now...", he whispers amused, lowering himself to your ear. "But I think someone's looking…"

You shut your eyes to not accidentally search for whoever it is.

"Where..?"

"You know the edge of the lawn..? He's pretending to be on the phone, maybe he is, but he keeps walking back and forth, looking here every time..."

"You wanna go back in?"

"No. I want to show you off", he says and pulls up your dress to the small of your back. "Should I spank your ass with my cock..?", he snickers.

"Shh, don't overdo it. Don't embarrass him."

"He's the little perv, spying on us. Or maybe you told him to come out..? Ah…Oh...I know how you like an audience…"

"So do you."

Carefully looking to your side, you spot him - and he's indeed a little spy. Baekhyun's right about you liking an audience, so you arch a little deeper, bend your knee higher up. Turning to face him you mouth "faster", so he goes faster, sliding his hands down your cheeks, pressing them apart. Cocking his head he can't resist to caress your anal with his thumb and moans..

His tongue plays in the side of his mouth, as if he knows your secret, knows what a dirty little girl you are, wanting him so bad you don't care who sees.

"I'm….ssh, pulling out...", he says, wetting his thumb then continues to rub.

"Wait 'til we get home…"

"Not like that", he says, letting the tip of his finger slide in, not at all having meant for it to be his length.

Even just that bit of stimulation increases your arousal, so you push back on him. Following your lead, he presses his entire thumb in, breathing all the harder.

"No, no…", he pants after a while, more so to himself than you. "I'm teasing myself..."

"You're not gonna come?"

"No", he replies, on his way over the edge. "Ahh...no, I'm waiting...ah...ah, shit."

He pulls out at the last minute, grabs the shaft of his cock and leans over you with stuttering breaths.

"Fucking close…"

•

Baekhyun's curious way of sleeping when you're out of town continues; at home he likes his side, anywhere else and he tends to stay on yours. As if he's barely moved, his head is tucked deep in the pillow, his arm seemingly slid off your waist lying just behind your back. Knowing he's had a rough week at work you decide to let him sleep in, tuck your feet in the courtesy slippers and carefully close the door behind you.

Finding an - equally courteous - robe in the bathroom you take a deep breath, smelling the hem of it. It is just a morning robe, but the stitching reminds you of the dobok Baekhyun used to wear for hapkido, when you'd pretend to be watching any- and everyone compete until he finally asked you out. He's really loved you for that long...

It's a lovely day. There's no sunny sky, or birdsong when you open the kitchen window, but an overcast, quiet morning. It might be in your head, but you imagine getting a whiff of the salty ocean and decide to have your coffee outside (hoping the beach hammock you've set your sights on doesn't flip you over).

Sighing over just how randomly you managed to pick a random magazine from the pile, you welcome the low snort coming from inside. Bending your knees, letting the robe slide from your legs, you pretend to not notice and continue "reading". A cheeky whistle rings out from the kitchen window.

"My, my…"

Bingo. Hiding behind the magazine, you compose yourself and count to three before dropping it on the grass, and sure as salt on fries, there he walks across the lawn.

"I thought I'd let you sleep in."

"M-hm…", he murmurs, opening his robe, showing his hardening cock. Stroking the back of your thigh he gives you a kiss. "How'd you sleep?"

"I was out in five. You?"

"Same", he nods, letting his robe fall down.

Straightening your legs up, he kisses a trail from your calf downwards, caressing the back of your legs. When his eyes meet yours he spanks your cheek, a quick flick of the wrist causing a lashing effect. He smiles at your jolting and the subsequent bucking of your hips in pleasure.

"Did you put the plug in again?"

"No…", he shakes his head, guiding his cock into you. "You're still my favourite toy."

It's a tighter squeeze with having your legs closed, but it means his length strokes your entrance harder - a different nuance. And when he hikes your legs up, hugging your thighs, you almost feel like a toy; letting your body bounce up and down on meeting his energetic rolling, stroking you here, digging his fingers into you there, biting his lip with dark eyes fixed on yours - Baekhyun knows full well this is the position that makes you feel the most filthy. Because with no anchoring, there's nothing you can do, no action to take than to be fucked by him. Your powerlessness makes you squirm, but also makes you wet. When Baekhyun fucks you like this...your brain goes splat. And of course, he wouldn't be Baekhyun if he didn't tease you about it. Chuckling, sucking on your leg, he coos:

"Mmpoor baby…"

Closing your eyes earns you a rough slam.

"Look at me, honey…"

Continuing with the same, hard, thrusts, he lets out a cascade of sweet moans and hums, he himself eventually closing his own eyes, elation painted on his face. Letting himself be momentarily swept away, he comes back with a few deep, soft thrusts before pulling out, spreading your bent legs. Untying the belt still round your waist, he leans in, dousing you in moany kisses, circling his thumb over your nipple. Backing, kneeling high in the grass, he softly feathers his fingertips on your thighs, his kisses leading the way, sending shivers through your body. When he reaches the edge between your legs and pussy, he runs them along it, up...down...up...down...up...down, letting his fingers follow the curve close to your hole, meeting just below it. By the pull of his lips you can tell he's near bursting with desire to eat you out, yet he waits - not only to tease you, but for your pleasure.

Sliding his fingers up, onto your folds, he carefully parts them, making sure you feel the stretch on your clit. Knowing better than to rush him all you can do is caress yourself, try not to roll your hips.

"You're swollen…", he whispers, swaying his head, taking a deep breath. Stroking circles on your ass with his thumbs, he at last lets his lips touch you, a juicy kiss just under your entrance. Wrapping his arm around your leg, he lets his fingers glide over your entrance, collecting fluids which he uses to slide up either side of your clit, massaging while continuing working under your entrance.

You watch with anticipation when he comes closer. Barely opening his mouth he envelopes your clit, letting his slick lips slide from it before doing it again.

"Put your fingers inside…", you whisper, tangling your fingers in his hair.

He calmly takes it away with a mild "no..." and flicks his tongue over you, gently panting. You moan and automatically bring your hand back - a phenomenal pain electrifies your core up to your chest when he spanks your clit. Don't means don't. He smiles at you while lapping to soothe it, putting some pressure on your entrance, rubbing it, while you grip your thighs in want.

"Get down here", he says, sliding his hands to your waist.

Tipping over in his lap with a yelp, you welcome feeling his body against yours for a moment before he gets you on your back.

Spreading his thighs wide, he steers his cock down and pushes it into you. Knowing you're definitely ready, he sets a quick pace from the get, hooking his hands at the top of your legs, pulsating firmly. Paying special attention to his shaft he makes sure it meets your body with each thrust, squeezing his balls on your ass. The entrance stimulation - smacking and stretching - releases more juice, leading to wetter claps.

He lets you pull him down, but keeps pounding like before, supporting himself on his knees, grunting when you dig your nails in his ass - separating them gives his sensitive hole a tickle.

He breathes wetly next to you, lying down, rocking your body as well as he begins billowing his hips, lifting you up by your ass to get - and give - a deeper hit. The smell of his perfume long gone, only the scent of his slept in skin remains, mixing with notes of freshly cut grass as your moving's broken it to release its scent.

"Mhh", he grunts in your neck. "I love you…".

Raising his head, the muscles on his back grow even stiffer, protruding above his spine. Barely finishing your kiss, he whispers "I love you" in your mouth, his wet lips caressing yours before a wail rings in your head. Dropping his head he stutters, his breath hitching as he swings his hips back-and-forth erratically, fucking his cum into you.

"Uh...ah...mmmm…", he moans, pressing deeply.

His breath is hot on your collarbone, his stomach pushing down on yours as he pants and swallows hard.

"Marry me."

"Marr…", you stutter, breathing heavily, then laugh, seeing as how you already are. "What if I say no..?"

"Nah-ah, marry me...", he says again, peppering tickling kisses on your neck.

You cry out and try to get away, to no avail.

"Okay, okay! On one condition."

"What?", he asks, looking at you.

"Finish what you started…"

A sly smile spreads across his face then he showers you with kisses again.

"You're gonna marry me so many times over..."

#baekhyun smut

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s1ater · 4 years ago

Note

hiii i saw that you write cobra kai imagines and i was wondering if you could do a miguel imagine in which the reader is best friends with robby and has developed feelings for him while miguel still likes sam, so the reader and miguel start fake dating and emd up catching feelings for eachother?🥺💞

failure to plan, part one. miguel diaz x reader

summary 📣: above :)

warnings 🚫: gif not mine, swearing

slater’s note 🗯: also there will be A PART TWO I PROMISE

“i have a plan.”

you looked up from your textbooks, seeing a very hyper miguel, his hands pressed down onto the table, inches across from you.

you press your lips into a thin line, narrowing your brows up to the boy, your head slightly quirked to the side, “what’s your plan?”

miguel pulled out the seat in front of you, causing you to begin to close your books and set them to the side, giving him your divided attention.

“i need to be with same,” he said straight forward, folding his arms against the cold, blue plastic table, “i’m done constantly chasing after her.. wondering whether or not she likes me the way i like her still.”

he paused giving you time to process his words as he tried to think of what to say next, how to form his words while your lips pressed back into a line.

you didn’t know miguel that well... well you did but he was more or so an acquaintance than anything else. you had found yourself noticing him a lot more the moment him and robby had began to get along, causing your whole friend group to pull closer together, that being, sam, you, tory, robby, demetri, eli, and miguel.

he was a funny kid, one you could put a lot of trust into if you needed to.

“i know you like robby,” he paused, looking down at the table as if he was slightly ashamed for knowing this information, and you yourself were slightly shocked, but you stayed silent, resisting the urge to open your mouth. “i see the way you look at him, i know you like that kid just as much as i like sam.”

robby. that “kid” was your best friend and you had very valid reasons as to why you liked him, one being as to he was there for you since day one. robby didn’t have a lot of trust in people, nor did anyone seem to trust him... but you.

you had met him at a skating rink where you had just about fallen on your ass if he hadn't swooped in and caught you by the arm, keeping you on your feet and away from falling into a deep pit of hurt and scratches.

he taught you things, you kept him out of trouble, you kept each other alive and in your well beings. you couldn't have asked for a better friend nor would you ever think about replacing him.

that’s why it was hard for you to realize that you thought of him more than just a friend. the thought of ruining what you had with for something that might not even be a possibility, that being; him liking you.

“yeah, okay, so you know that, what about it?”

“i have a proposition.”

“get to the point.”

you didn’t intend for anything that came out of your mouth to be rude, but the fact that he knew something so personal, something that you wouldn't even tell your mom or girl best friend about made you uncomfortable, on edge. what else did he know?

it was ridiculous to feel so attacked by miguel diaz because really, the kid was sweet, he had no attentions in being harmful, but you just couldn't stop your mind from caving in on itself.

“fake date,” he said it straight forward making you curve your head a bit in confusion and in thought, wondering whether or not your heard him right or if you were really going crazy faster than you thought.

“huh?” “fake dating,” he repeated, “it’s the only way to tell whether or not if i’m wasting my time, but i don’t think i am, i just know she likes me back but i need to push her a bit.” “so you want to make her jealous?” he nodded his head, waiting for you to say something, waiting for you to say ‘yes’.

“what’s in it for me?” “works both ways.” “yes, but i don’t think robby likes me like that, that’s why i haven’t said anything to him about it-”

“y/n,” he cuts you off, wanting to slow down the oncoming rambling that was about to spill out of your mouth in one big mess, “guy best friends usually like their girl best friends. robby just needs a push as well.”

it made you bit your lip in thought, eyes racing back on the table top before you. the idea he presented before you was either a really good one... or a really, really bad one.

“i’ll think about it,” you got up quickly, grabbing all your books before rushing out of the library.

°•

monday came rather fast, making you think you didn’t have nearly enough time to think about miguel’s proposition. you knew he would probably would want an answer, especially due to the fact that you had ignored all his phone calls and texts.

hanging out with robby all weekend hadn’t necessarily gave you any clarity either. it was the only thing on your mind as you the two of you went to the skate park and his dad's apartment, and mr. larusso’s home, and the food court, and anywhere and everywhere. the only thing.

you begun to feel bad because twenty minutes into hanging out he had noticed, giving you hard time about it as time continued on it seemed to have been a repetitive thing.

“what’s on your mind, kid?” “uh, nothing.”

all you could say was you felt bad.

you hustled down the hallway, trying your best to maneuver yourself around the teen bodies that filled the hallway like a small box. it was hot and stuffy and you felt your heart all high in your chest as you tried to spot for something familiar, spot robby.

you continued down the hallway before hitting a clearing a relief hitting you and lightening up on your chest, analyzing your environment before planning out how you’d get to your next class.

you rounded a corner, five feet away from your physics class before you felt the weight of your body being pulled back in your past tracks.

and you almost smacked whoever did so before realizing it was miguel, a relief coming over you as you sighed, sinking your shoulders back into a more relaxed position.

he slightly laughed, letting go of your arm, “relax, it’s just me.”

you rolled your eyes, nodding him off, “what do you want?”

“i want an answer.”

“what?” you almost resisted the urge to play dumb but the words just fell out of your mouth, think it would give you more time to make up your mind.

“you know what.”

“yeah, i don't know,” you turned around but he grabbed onto your shoulder quickly before flipping you back around.

“y/n,” he gave you a pointed look that made you even more anxious than you already were.

you bit the inside of your cheek, hoping the answer would just come to you right in that moment, but it didn't. there was just some part of you that just didn't understand, maybe that was what was holding you back due to the lack of clarity on the situation. what did “fake dating” even entail? what would you have to do? and why you? what was so special about you other then the fact that you were just as helpless as he was to getting the person he liked to like him back.

but so what? there were hundreds of girls like that at your school.

you exhaled, almost rolling your head down in shame, “you know what, fine, i’ll ‘fake date’ you... but you have to tell me why.”

“what do you mean, why?”

“why me, miguel?”

he rolled his eyes as if it should have been the most obvious thing in the world, “i already told you, we both have people we like-”

“yeah but there’s other people in this school in that exact situation,” you extended out your arm, getting worked up for basically nothing.

miguel rolled his eyes again before taking a step forward, “we can talk about this later, meet me in the library later.”

and he walked off.

°•

“hey, can i give you a ride?”

three o’clock arrived like clock work and after seven classes of hell you walked out of your last one, completely exhausted and ready to go home, but remembered you still had to meet miguel in the library.

it had been bearing on your mind all day, that you just wished you could forget about it and go home with robby like he offered.

“no, i can’t,” you mumbled, diverting your body to face robby as the two of you neared the exit of the school.

“why not? got a hot date or something?”

“something like that,” you smiled just as he did.

“alright, i’ll see you later,” he gave your arm a tight squeeze before walking out the doors, waving as he continued out onto the parking lot.

“lord, help me.”

°•

“no strings attached, you don’t have to call me at twelve in the morning when your crying nor do i have to call you when i get hurt or some shit,” miguel was straightforward, he pulled out his phone and began reading from a list off of it, like he had had this planned way before even deciding to talk to you about it. “we’re here to make people jealous, not get attached.”

you nodded, trying to process all the things he had said in the past ten minutes about what was to go down with the two of for however how long it would take before either sam or robby broke from underneath the pressure of you two “dating”.

miguel already had the week planned and you were slightly grateful that he knew what he was doing because you sure as hell didn't.

“i’ll take you out to the mini golf place so then it’s public, you know? it’ll seem more official and that way people will see us together...” he continued on by saying, “we hold hands, kiss in the hall, and do all the cheesy couple shit.” “thought you were a sucker for that stuff,” you hummed, raising your eyebrows, slightly shocked by him bad mouthing all the “cheesy shit” that couples do, the type of shit you would see him doing in the halls with sam when they were still a thing.

he rolled his eyes, “whatever, we got a deal?”

you watched him raise his hand, reaching across the table for your own... and you took it, nodding your head still lost, but content now.

“we have a deal.”

masterlist

taglist 🗞:

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tact-and-impulse · 3 years ago

Text

Lovelace Day fic incoming, @shepherds-of-haven! The AO3 link is here, where I’ve noted the generator prompts. I wanted a unifying theme for this year, and since last time consisted of kisses on the mouth...

other than the lips

i. back

She returned later than expected, and she let out a breath of relief when she entered her dark room. She pushed the door shut with her back foot, about to create light.

“Did you have a good time?”

Immediately, she collected astral flame in her palm, whirling towards the voice. Her forearm was pinned against the door, as Chase materialized out of the shadows. She should have been irritated by his smirk, how he caught her off guard, but familiarity was comforting after what happened. “I thought you said you wouldn’t be around tonight. Did you sneak in through the window?”

“You know me well, sunshine.” He glanced down at her burning hand. “A little on edge, aren’t you? How was your date?”

The magical fire dimmed, as she split and sent the smaller lights floating to her candles. She protested. “It wasn’t a date. I thought it was a work-related meeting. Until the others ran off, leaving me at dinner with a sailor, whose boss finalized a business deal with the Merchants’ Guild. And somebody must have told you, so who was it?”

“Oh, I can’t give them up. That would be too easy.” His deft fingers glided upwards, to the inside of her elbow, then her shoulder. “Whew, you’re tense. Want a massage?”

Exhaustion had caught up to her, and she gave in. “Yeah, that would be…nice.”

She was about to use her chair, but Chase insisted otherwise. “The bed’s better.”

“Aren’t you just doing my shoulders?” Still, she sat cross-legged on her blanket, waiting as he moved behind her.

He cracked his knuckles. “Unless you ask for more.”

“Pervert.”

However, he stayed true to his word. He applied just enough pressure, firmly working her muscles. His thumbs rotated in circles, pinpointed exactly where the tension was greatest. When he reached the base of her scalp, she reflexively arched. She clamped her lips together, trying not to make any sounds as sweet release diffused throughout her upper body. Not that she was shy, but this was a friendly favor.

Chase was strangely quiet and she was wondering why, when he remarked. “So…you never said whether you enjoyed your little outing.”

She hesitated. “It wasn’t bad. He was actually decent. He didn’t try to condescend, and he didn’t care that I’m a Mage.”

“The minimum for decency, then.” Chase breezily said.

“Yeah, I’ve met worse.” She grimaced, steadying her voice. Hael, his fingers were fantastic. She had to say something or she’d moan out loud. “Maybe it’s because he hasn’t sailed for too long. His hometown is out west, so we bonded over that.”

His touch receded, and she instantly felt cold. His tone was carefully neutral. “Well, it’s good that you like him.”

Incredulous, she turned her head. “I didn’t say I liked him. Nice as he was, there wasn’t any chemistry. I turned him down.”

“Really?” His expression was genuinely surprised. “That’s not what…never mind.”

“Not what you heard? Or saw?” She raised an eyebrow. “Were you spying on the restaurant?”

“Little old me? Why would you think that?”

“I wonder why.”

“Alright, I may have overheard your stories. He clearly liked you, although who wouldn’t? And I noticed you were laughing.”

“Only because his jokes were terrible. If you were watching until the end, you would have seen that I said no to a second meeting.”

“Nah, I had to leave early. Kato was asking about something.” His explanation was casual, but she sensed that he wasn’t being entirely truthful.

“Even if it was for a short time, thanks for keeping an eye. I was kind of angry that I was set up. I wasn’t asking to be.” And there was the matter of their arrangement. It was a fairly recent thing, and they mutually agreed seeing other people wouldn’t be a problem. But during the ‘date’, she couldn’t help comparing him to Chase. Not as quick-witted, not as fun, not as charismatic. Not as compatible. Luckily, the rejection was taken well but that wasn’t enough to reconsider. “Besides, I’d rather walk on a rooftop again.”

“Now, there’s an idea. We’ll sneak out sometime.” He was significantly more cheerful. “You’re definitely less tense. Anything else you need?”

“...Yeah.” She stripped off her tunic, shook her hair loose, and boldly stared at him. “I’m asking for more.”

“Good. I wanted to hear every noise you can make.” His green eyes glinted, and he pulled her down.

In the middle of the night, she abruptly woke, her face against his naked back. His breaths were even and deep. He hadn’t left. It took a moment to decide not to create a mark, and then, she kissed the closest point along his spine. If he was still around in the morning, she’d ask if he was available for dinner.

ii. ear

“I’ll kill whoever made this device.” He grumbled, as he attempted to break the lock for a third time. The cuff around his right wrist was snug but that wasn’t the problem. The metallic chain was taut, winding and twisting into a coiled mess.

A forceful blast of wind shook the links of the other end, and a frustrated cry meant that Ayla wasn’t successful either. Despite her precision, her handcuff wasn’t budging. “And I’ll pitch in! How’s your end?”

“Give me a second…” Something gave under the lockpick and he actually dared to hope, before his tool snapped in half. “Shit!”

The central tangle rotated, clicking as the links were drawn further in. He dug his heels into the Vaults’ flooring, but his strength was no match for the device’s power. Once Ayla was within reach, he grabbed her arm, bracing for an explosion. It never came. The buzz of magic faded, and they were still intact.

Still handcuffed together. The chains had wrapped into a sphere, and it was the only thing between them. They couldn’t even separate an inch.

“I thought you said you could do it!” Her glare was furious.

“I was feeling pretty confident. Sorry, I should have realized it was arcane.” He shrugged. “I never took the metalworking elective while I was at the Veiled Circle. Well, Red’s out of Haven, but let’s see if we can track down another Mage who could help us.”

They walked in tandem, although it was initially awkward. He had to shorten his stride to match her pace, and their cuffed hands had to be swung in time with each step. Exiting the Vaults, they’d found a solid rhythm.

“Doing alright?” He asked.

“Not terrible.” She muttered. “We could be dead, I guess.”

“Splattered across the inside of the Vaults?”

“Yeah, you should have seen your face when your lockpick broke.” She bumped shoulders, and she smiled for the first time since their ordeal began. “If you didn’t learn metalworking, what’d you take instead?”

He grinned. “I always knew I wanted to explore Blest, so I signed up for mapmaking. Of course, it was nothing like experience in the field, but it gave me the knowledge of where to start and how to find more information.”

“Makes sense.” She paused. “Speaking of info, what are we going to say?”

“The truth: I was helping you look for a magical accessory. You’re a Shepherd now, you deserve one.” Anything was useful in fighting Endarkened, but he wanted to ensure that Ayla was fully protected in battle. “We came across the handcuffs and accidentally locked ourselves.”

“Is that the story we’re giving? Because it’s not complete.” She frowned. “I found it, I thought it was a gauntlet until the cuff snapped on.”

“Hey, I’m not blaming you.” He pivoted, so they were properly facing each other. Their magically bound hands were restrained, but he clasped her other elbow. “I was relieved when I got hold of the chain. If you were in danger, I had to try something. There’s nobody else I’d rather be handcuffed to, anyway. We’re in this mess together but we’ll solve it together. I promise. Okay?”

Her gaze was searching, and then, she nodded. “Okay.”

They continued on, heading for the nearest common area. He was about to open the door when warmth brushed the tapered point of his ear. Ayla was extremely close, standing on tiptoes, and she glanced away in embarrassment.

“Thank you.”

A clatter, followed by another that was too successive to be an echo. Then, the chain links dropped in a straight line. His wrist felt lighter, the cool air washing over his skin. His brow furrowed in confusion. “Did you dispel it?”

Ayla stared at her newly freed hand. “I’m not sure what I did. Maybe, there was just a time limit and we reached it.” She spun a wind current, lifting the handcuffs and chain off the floor. Neither of them made direct contact, as the damned device was placed on a table. He stood guard, while she evacuated everyone else.

“Let me know when you’re done.” She spared a backwards look. “I’ll kill you if you’re trapped again.”

He laughed. “Understood.”

An acquaintance from Capra soon arrived, inspecting with growing recognition. “It’s a rudimentary model but this is a…er, it was banned decades ago. Basically, it was used to test a couple’s devotion. Once it’s in place, it can only be removed by mutual affection. The standard escape clause of true love. Really, the spellwork tracks pulse and breathing rate and other physiological parameters, so that’s how-”

“Yeah, yeah, I get it. Thanks for explaining.” He made a hasty exit, rubbing his ear. The recollection of Ayla’s soft mouth flashed in his mind, over and over.

True love, huh?

iii. knee

Her first flight on an airship was supposed to be relaxing. Breathtaking views, delicious cuisine, landings at places she’d never seen before. And of course, the best traveling companion she could ever ask for.

Behind her closed eyes, he was frantic, sprinting through the lower levels. His teeth were clenched and his gun was at the ready, but he was in control. It was a shame he was too distant; she couldn’t convey any details of her location.

A hard slap across her face ended the vision. The burliest kidnapper, most likely the leader, asserted. “She’s awake. I caught her eyeballs rovin’ under the blindfold.”

She didn’t react. The situation required a delicate approach, and she had to buy time until Trouble found this machinery room. Her hands were tied behind her back, and her ankles were fixed in a crossed position by another rope. Her pockets were turned inside out and a cloth napkin was in her mouth as a gag, but she hadn’t been beaten. She was grateful for that until the leader spoke again.

“Give me the whip, that’ll bring her around.”

She quickly lifted her head, and it was easy to act terrified, struggling like an earthworm after a storm. One lackey was by the door, and the other was sticking close to the leader. Through her scrying, she now knew their faces too. Nothing about them struck recognition, but then again, she was knocked unconscious after leaving the bathroom.

“See? What’d I tell you? Now then, pretty, you gotta have more money on you. Where’s the rest of it?”

She gave a muffled sound, more of a laugh than anything else. How could she possibly speak through a napkin?

“Boss, are you sure about this?” The nearer subordinate tentatively asked. “She’s Diminished, but she could still use magic…”

The threat to authority wasn’t taken well, and a squabble broke out. Discreetly, she fiddled with the rope but couldn’t obtain a firm grasp. Ah, he was getting close. Her thoughts reached out, sharing images from her Divination. And he responded, with a surge of pure emotion.

“At least, just take out the gag. If she screams, then gut her.” That was the nasal voice of the furthest one. The suggestion must have been accepted because the napkin was wrenched past her lips.

Dry air hit the inside of her mouth, and she winced before announcing. “My husband’s here.”

“Yeah, we know you’re on your honeymoon. That’s why you should cooperate, unless you wanna go home in bitty pieces.”

“No, I mean that he’s here.” She emphasized, and it finally dawned on the goons just as the door squealed. A crash, as it was torn off its hinges, and subsequent shouting. She rolled to the floor, left to pray that Trouble was fine. Pain seared over her leg, causing her to yelp. The trickle of liquid made her more nervous.

Then, her blindfold was ripped away, and she blinked, adjusting to the light. Trouble was grim, his golden hair shining, as he cut the ropes. “I’m sorry. I should have realized you were gone earlier.”

She coughed. “It’s okay, they took me by surprise.” She lifted a numb hand but her kidnappers were already detained by the security guards. Each was bleeding in a different place.

Trouble carried her to the airship’s sickbay and hovered while she was examined by the Norm physician on board. Fortunately, the bruises would disappear without issue and the cut was the only significant injury. Any magic other than psionic didn’t come naturally; she’d done what she could to seal the skin and minimize the damage. A scar still remained, a perfectly straight line on her kneecap. It didn’t look terrible, but Trouble was fixated, his thumb tracing circles around the area.

“It’s not my first scar.” She reminded him.

“No, it isn’t.” He sighed. “Could have been prevented though.”

“You tracked me down pretty fast, and I don’t think they would have hurt me badly. I’m glad you didn’t kill them.”

“Well, I’m not the same cocky quickdraw you first met.” He tried to be lighthearted but it wasn’t quite working. “There were scuff marks by the bathroom, and one of the servers noticed your shoes, while you were being dragged away. When I heard, I thought the worst.”

“I’ll admit it was frightening, but I knew you’d come. Things happen all the time, and that’s why we vowed to protect each other. And you certainly did.”

“You weren’t too bad yourself, hanging in there and setting up a psychic link.” He tenderly kissed her knee, above the scar. “Well, it’ll be a crazy tale to tell everyone else when we’re back in Haven.”

She smiled, interlacing her fingers over her abdomen. “And a great bedtime story for this kid.”

“…Huh?”

iv. cheek

After the meeting ended, she remained in Blade’s office. She had memorized his schedule, and he had five minutes to spare before training his squad. That was enough time for them to talk. She watched him file away his papers, waiting for the right moment before declaring.

“Something’s bothering you.”

He closed a desk drawer, and for the first time today, he looked at her. Just as abruptly, he averted her gaze. His answer was stilted. “It isn’t important.”

“I think it is, if you’re avoiding me.” She added. “I’m not upset. I only want to know, so I can support you. But you don’t have to share.”

A muscle worked in his jaw. He leaned against his desk, folding his arms. “I don’t usually have such vivid dreams but this was different.”

“A nightmare?” She gently asked, slowly drawing towards him.

“It seemed so, at the beginning. We were here, and the wards went off. You and I went together to find the intruder. And it was…me. As a teenager.”

“Was that your dream? Fighting your past self?”

“We didn’t fight. You talked him down, and he actually listened. In fact, he only listened to you. He was a disrespectful brat to everyone else.” He muttered. “Whatever mission he had, he’d forgotten completely when you were in the room.”

“Hold on.” She blinked rapidly, trying to understand. “Are you jealous? Of yourself?”

“Who said I was jealous?” He was definitely sulking.

“But you are!” Laughter bubbled out of her, even more so when his scowl worsened. “I kind of wish that I could have experienced it. So, was I paying attention to him instead of you?”

“Only because he was behaving like an idiot, acting docile in your presence and tailing you throughout the tower.”

“Well, I wouldn’t have minded. If he was the teenaged you, he had to be a good person, deep down.”

His expression was incredulous. “That’s exactly what you said in the dream.”

“Is that so? I’m glad I was in character.”

The corner of his mouth twitched, as he fought a smile. “But there was some truth, I behaved badly at that age. Rude, impatient, without a mythas. That version of myself could be a completely different person altogether. And you treat everyone with kindness, with the benefit of the doubt. The dream was unsettling in many ways, but it made me consider if someone like you was around, he might have found his path earlier. Or eventually, you would have grown to dislike him.”

Disliking Blade was unfathomable to her at this point in their relationship but she mulled over his perspective. The man who led the Shepherds, who had people to protect, who she’d fallen in love with. He was the sum of his experiences, good and bad, and right now, the shameful memories were at the forefront.

“When I was younger, I was content to stay in the background, out of sight and unaware of my own worth. Maybe, you would have thought I was a pushover. But it’s just possibility.” She gave him a quick peck on the cheek. “I fell in love with the current you. It would have been interesting to see you as a teenager, but I wouldn’t change anything about how we met.”

A faint blush brought color to his face. However, he didn’t turn away. “Still, I shouldn’t have avoided you. I…apologize.”

“There’s nothing to forgive.” She could have kissed him again, but she noticed the clock. They would have to part ways in less than a minute, and in his office, there was always the risk of being caught. “One more thing? How did your dream end?”

“He was following you too closely and impeding your duties. I gave him a good smack and you told me not to hit him. That’s where it stopped.”

Her initial reaction had been to protest at his behavior, but that was how it played out and it was just too funny. “If you ever dream a continuation, you should recruit him.”

“Absolutely not.” He paused. “There would be an exception.”

“You’d have to be in the same room with me at all times?”

“Would you object?” His smirk was devastating, and even though she’d seen it numerous times, she was still flustered.

“Not really…”

“Unfortunately, it wasn’t quite what I was thinking of. My exception was different; if there was another adolescent, perhaps a ‘pushover’, then he could join the Order. A conclusive ending to that dream.” He nodded decisively.

The sentiment touched her, and she softly agreed. “That would be a nice dream.”

The leftover seconds ticked away, and his arm slipped around her as the conversation came to a natural end. They could only do this much, but the time they had together was real.

v. fingers

Not even Healing magic cured colds, to her disappointment. She glanced at her reflection in the mirror, and she certainly looked as sick as she felt. Her eyes were dull, and perspiration dampened the scarf tied over her nose and mouth. The building pressure within her head made her sluggish, causing her to fumble with the clasp of her cloak. She had to tell the others she couldn’t patrol.

The hallway seemed much longer; she had to stop before reaching the stairs. Resting her forehead against the stone wall, she wondered if there was a faster way. The haze slightly cleared at the sound of her name.

Halek was walking up, his expression concerned. “You don’t look so good.”

“I think I have a cold.” Every word scraped her throat. “I’m asking if I can take the day off, so I don’t infect anyone else.”

“I can tell your squad. Have you eaten yet?”

“I had a late breakfast. Or is it an early lunch? One of those…I woke up late.” She had tried to sleep off the discomfort, but that hadn’t improved her condition at all.

“You should rest more. Go back to sleep, alright?”

Unable to argue, she shuffled the way she came. She changed out of her uniform and dove under her covers, closing her eyes again. When was the last time she was sick? Never in the mountains, strangely enough. Leore, perhaps? And that was years ago.

She woke at intervals, swallowing medicine doses and paging through travelogues. Slowly, the day passed, and it was almost dusk when there was a knock. She cracked the door open, her eyes widening.

Halek stood there, holding a tray. The lower half of his face was covered by black cloth, but he looked…good? Her fever must have spiked because she felt hot all over. He had to repeat himself. “I brought you dinner. It may be easier if I just come in. Can I?”

She nodded, allowing him to step inside. Her personal space was organized, her tea table clean. He set the tray down before taking the spare chair. Oh. He was staying.

“How are you feeling?” He inquired.

“Still weak. I had medicine and lots of tea. Some crackers. Nothing like what you brought.” Her attention shifted to the tray. A bowl of chicken and vegetables floating in fragrant broth. Lightly toasted bread, accompanied with a jar of citrus preserves in honey. And a familiar drink. “Did you make everything?”

“Yeah.” Even the mask couldn’t conceal his satisfaction. “I know you grew up on a farm, so I kept it simple.”

“Thank you. This is nostalgic.” She smiled and reached for the cup. “Especially the tonic.”

“It wrecks the palate but it works.”

“I remember. When I was little, my parents had to watch me drink every drop.” She pinched her nose, tipping the viscous liquid back. The blend of pungent herbs and spices pierced through her congestion. Authentic.

He was trying not to laugh at the face she made; something like a wheeze escaped him. “There you go. The rest of your meal is better.”

“I believe you.” She tasted the soup. Savory, with a hint of salt. But she was so tired, and after a couple sips, her spoon slid out of her grasp.

However, Halek took it, stirring the surface. He didn’t seem embarrassed as he lifted the next spoonful. “You should finish as much as you can. Open up.”

She stared. “Uh…what?”

“I’m feeding you.” He patiently said. “It’s no big deal.”

The gods could strike her with divine lightning at any moment, she thought as she resigned herself. Halek’s gray eyes were steady, but when she asked about how he prepared the food, he was more alert. He had requested a corner of the kitchen, handling every step from simmering the stock to kneading the dough. Gradually, she became comfortable.

She was almost sorry to see the bottom of the bowl. “Thanks for doing this.”

“I didn’t mind. I fed my brother whenever he got sick.”

So, did that mean she was like his sister? Her throat tightened, probably a spasm. “Can I have the bread?”

She was sure he’d hand over the plate, but he spread the honeyed fruit on the toast and sliced them. He offered each piece, bite by bite. A kind gesture, as friends did. This wasn’t special treatment. Then, her lips brushed his fingers and she froze at the contact.

“Sorry.” Her mouth tingled. “Was that weird?”

“No.” He was unreadable under the mask. His hand moved to her forehead, his touch reassuring. “You’re a little less warm.”

“Really? That’s good.”

“Mm. But I’ll take care of you until you’re cured.”

Heat swept through her again. She should have realized it wasn’t a symptom of her illness.

vi. hair

The secluded mountain retreat was the perfect place for a group vacation. The dense woods provided privacy, and the crisp air was revitalizing. Best of all, the inn was built around hot springs. Even from the windows, the steam visibly rose from the pools. Signs indicated unique features: minerals, temperature, vantage point. And according to the innkeepers, there were secret springs, deeper within the mountains.

And he believed he found a clue to one.

He had gone for a walk to enjoy the sunrise, and in the early light, he noticed certain stones that glimmered. They led into the forest, subtly leading beyond the retreat’s confines. He hurried back to the inn. He could have gone to every room, to see who was awake and willing to follow the trail. But he had a feeling that the glimmer would fade, and so, he headed straight for Briony’s room.

She was half-asleep, and her pink hair was adorably mussed. However, as he explained, she perked up. “Sure, let’s go exploring! Just the two of us?”

“We can tell the others later, once we know where it is.” He offered his hand. “Shall we?”

She accepted with a radiant smile, and they headed out. The stones weren’t as reflective; they had to move quickly. The underbrush grew thicker, the path narrowing. With his longer stride, he was a step ahead, but he held on tightly to her hand. In the unfamiliar terrain, he was glad to be alongside her.

And suddenly, it emerged. This spring was smaller than the others, but snug and perfectly circular. A sign jutted out of the ground, although the lettering was rendered illegible from years of sun and rain. The water was enticingly clear.

“It looks pretty shallow.” He noted. He dipped a couple fingertips beneath the surface, and ripples spread outward.

“Then, should we try it first? Breakfast won’t be served for another half hour.” Her violet eyes were eagerly focused on the pool, then flitted to him in realization. “Oh, wait. Do we have to take turns?”

During this vacation, the Shepherds had typically spent their baths separated by gender. A handful of exceptions were in the largest hot spring, with swimwear and a generous distance between the halves.

He hesitated before suggesting. “Or…we can face away from each other. Underclothes on, if that’s alright with you.”

She slowly nodded. “Y-yeah. I think it’s a good idea.”

“You can go ahead first. I’ll turn aside and keep watch.” He sat on a flat rock, intending to wait.

However, to his shock, she bent close and loudly kissed the top of his head. Not quite touching, the kiss was really into his hair. “Thank you!”

He tried not to listen to the rustling sounds of her clothes and after she entered, he blindly removed his. He was warm even before he stepped in, so the heat was more intense. He was incredibly aware of Briony’s presence, but he began to relax. Whether it was the coziness or the peaceful surroundings, this spring had a soothing atmosphere.

A splash, and her shriek split the air.

“Briony?!” Without thinking, he whipped around and stood.

She had scrambled away from the edge of the pool. A dark shape writhed, its limbs flailing. Then, she broke into gasping laughter. She grabbed the creature and exclaimed. “It’s a frog!”

He exhaled in relief. “It must have dropped from a tree branch.”

“Yeah, and hot water’s not the usual habitat. Here you go.” She drifted closer to the greenery and set the frog down. Her turquoise slip was soaked through, and droplets sparkled on her bare arms. Then, she turned to him. Her eyes widened, a brighter flush coloring her face.

He followed her line of sight. His shorts were wet, drawn low across his hips and plastered to his skin. Clasping his hands over his groin, he awkwardly sank into the water. His throat was dry as he deflected. “Sorry. I acted on instinct, I didn’t mean to peek.”

“Um, it’s okay. I’m not really showing anything.” She bit her bottom lip. “Unless you want me to?”

He was definitely at risk of overheating. He weakly answered. “I wouldn’t force you.”

“I know. I trust you.”

He tilted his head…and stopped. In the distance, the morning bell rang. Her astral magic wicked off the excess water, and they hastily redressed. Navigating back to the inn was much faster. Everyone else was up, waving and calling.

He glanced at Briony and found that her stare was directed below his waistline. Their gazes locked. Abruptly, she darted to the other girls. The blush had never fled her cheeks. She obviously couldn’t forget what she’d seen.

It was a memorable diversion, if only they weren’t interrupted. At least, she wasn’t disappointed, he ruefully thought.

vii. sternum

The roar threatened to burst her eardrums, and the crashing of felled trees shook the ground beneath her feet. She crouched lower, trying to determine where the Endarkened was rampaging. Was it off course? Every muscle in her body twitched from surging adrenaline. A feeling she knew too well. In the past, she had succumbed to the instinct to flee.

But not now, and never again, while she was with the Shepherds.

Everyone was staggered with the intention to encircle and lead the massive demon to the valley. Once it was in the open, they could attack with full force. Literally, herding it. However, her good humor was extinguished when she received the message she’d been waiting for. This was the final push. She broke into a run, heart pounding.

Then, she was in broad daylight. The grassy slope was steep, and she had too much momentum. She stumbled; in horror, she realized she was going to roll straight towards the thrashing Revenant. Her stomach lurched in anticipation as she was suspended in midair…but she never landed. A pair of solid arms wrapped around her, and she looked up at her rescuer.

“Red!”

He winked at her. “Hang on tight!”

And they teleported. The world twisted, the sky narrowing to a thin blue line before it expanded again, and they were standing firmly upon the hillside. The valley was more distant than before, but at the moment, they were relatively safe.

She shook her curls out of her face, and despite the dizziness, she said. “Thanks so much, I thought I was done for.”

Even windswept, he seemed effortlessly handsome. His shirt was torn, revealing a tempting patch of tanned skin below his collarbone. He released her with a nod. Perhaps, somewhat reluctantly. “Well, I saw you trip, and I knew I could get to you in time. I’m glad I caught you.”

“Me too.” She clenched her fists. “Now, let’s kill this thing!” As much as she wanted to express her gratitude, they had a mission to accomplish.

Essentially, the demon was at the bottom of a bowl, and the Shepherds maintained the higher ground. The plan was for ranged attacks, then slowly closing in to finish it off. Red teleported away, fulfilling his task of triangulating runes and preventing it from escaping. Between ducking and dodging, she uttered summons for spirits, coaxing them to harass the Revenant. Like an itch it couldn’t scratch, like the maddening buzz of an insect swarm.

“Right there!” She pointed to an exposed section, and one of her daggers flew true to mark the vulnerability.

Suddenly, Red was at her side. “Nice job.” He spun his warhammer and sent it in the same direction, for a devastating strike that caused the demon to stagger.

“Showoff.” She playfully accused. “You’re really in top form today.”

“Hey, you are too.” But he smiled. His hand rested on her lower back, supporting her. “Found your footing yet?”

“Absolutely, although I wouldn’t mind you sticking around. I’d hate to lose track of you again.”

He was about to respond, but his eyes widened. “Damn it!” His grip tightened around her, and she glimpsed a large arm diving their way before he teleported them out. The valley flashed in a myriad of views, while they dodged the Revenant’s attention.

When they could finally catch their breath, Red grimaced. “It’s really putting up a fight. I’ll have to reinforce the runes.”

“You got this. Good luck!” She flashed a thumbs-up, and he gave her a last squeeze before he had to go.

Her mind raced, perusing her inventory. Ah, she had leftover bottles from her undercover stint in Karzai. She cast the spell and dropped the containers of strong acid on its extremities. They shattered upon impact, sloughing off translucent skin, and the damage was proven by the scream of rage. And here was a chance. Channeling her power through Red’s runes, the magic intensified, further restraining the demon.

The Shepherds rushed in. They kept a relentless offense, protecting those within talons’ reach and targeting the worst of its wounds. At last, the Revenant slumped. Black ichor poured out of the corpse, staining the ravaged earth. A collective cheer resounded through the valley.

She hugged everyone she saw, basking in the victory. Then, she collided into Red, and he practically lifted her.

“We did great!”

“Amazing, as always.” Boldly, she kissed his sternum, where his shirt was open. “I’ve been wanting to do that since you saved me.”

“Is it all you wanted to do?” His thumb traced her lips, and an electric current shot through her.

“Now that you’re asking, I did have a few ideas…for when we’re at camp. I’m so filthy.”

“We might as well clean up together.” And with a grin, he swept her away.

viii. pulse

In retrospect, she should have accounted for the pillars’ fragility.

She rubbed her gloved hands together, but the friction did nothing against the bitter cold. Her squad had journeyed to the north, where ancient Mage hoards dwelled beneath the ice. They trekked underground in search of magical tools, and while they cleared out the ruin, it began to collapse. The others were closer to the exit, and it was pure luck that nobody was killed in the resulting cave-in. There was only the waiting game, while the rest of the team enlisted people to dig out the blocked tunnel.

She eyed her companion, who was apparently in a state of hibernation. His crimson hair was disheveled, his arms crossed as he propped against a broken stone wall. When the debris settled, he had cursed explosively. It was only in the past few minutes that he was calmer, but she was well aware that he wasn’t giving up.

And neither had she. The old wards were still active, presumably a failsafe to protect the hoard. But once she could dispel them, converting the packed earth to sand was the easier task. Her passion was alchemy, after all. She only needed to think harder. Erasing her equations in the snow, she ventured. “Croelle? You never told me what you are.”

His yellow eyes shot open, to glare at her. “Are you delirious?”

“Well, if you could contribute anything, that would be useful in our predicament.”

“If you’re asking whether I have any ability to bring us to the surface, the answer is no. Your curiosity truly has damned you now.”

She dryly replied. “And you. You’re stuck with me.”

“I shouldn’t have noticed your presence in the backwater establishment the locals call a town.”

“So, what were you doing in the outpost? Even compared to your usual haunts, it was a new low.”

“It was; the drinks were terrible.” He hadn’t answered her question. His inscrutable features were only visible because of the mineral veins that glowed in the dark.

Above ground, night had probably fallen. The chill was permeating through her thick clothes, and she couldn’t suppress a violent shiver. How long had they been trapped? Lighting a fire was not an option in this closed environment. But it was terribly cold…

At his low voice, she jerked her head towards him. His arms were extended and she blinked. “Excuse me?”

“I said, come here. Or would you rather die of hypothermia?”

She certainly didn’t, so she shrugged and walked over. Unceremoniously, she dropped into his lap.

He grunted. “You’re infuriating.”

“Th-thanks.” Hael, her teeth were chattering.

His arms enveloped her, and his body heat was like a furnace. Almost comforting. She closed her eyes, partly for rest and partly to avoid looking at him. This position was very snug. His mouth grazed her neck, but an apology never came. Instead, he skimmed down, lingering over her pulse.

Sharp pain made her gasp. “What are you doing?!”

“Don’t fall asleep.” He hissed. “Do you hear me?”

“You didn’t have to bite me.” Nevertheless, she was awake. She fervently talked about arcane research as a distraction.

His comments were brief, the occasional prod. As numbness crept in, he warned. “You’re slipping. Tell me more about transfiguration.”

She tried to nod, but she was drifting. He began to speak in earnest. Curses, threats, her name, what happened to her free will. “Stop berating me.” She groaned. “Sing.”

“…What?”

“Never heard you b’fore.” And she was probably delirious, because she launched into a halting version of an Elvish oral epic. The first she’d ever memorized, it was about an accord with Mages. She was vaguely surprised when his gravelly voice joined in. He sounded like he was unused to singing though his accent was fairly good. And strangely, she sensed the wards unraveling.

The song ended, the freezing air thrumming. Blindly, she placed her hands on the uneven dirt and willed it to crumble to sand.

She jolted to consciousness. Immediately, she sat up and took in her surroundings. Her room at the inn, the fireplace burning. Then, her team crowded around, telling the story in fragments. They had excavated through the night, but Croelle actually met them halfway and she was draped over his shoulder. He had followed them back, smoldering in a corner until it was declared she was alright. Then, he rode out of town. Before she could thank him.

Dinner was downstairs; she insisted she’d join them soon. After they closed her door, she started to tie her hair up, and it hurt at the slightest brush. Frowning, she reached for her compact mirror. Indignation flooded her, at the purplish discoloration marring her skin. He had left a bruise.

When their paths crossed again, she’d have to return the favor.

#shepherds of haven #i combined two prompts for each one again for the extra challenge #but also #a swap within each couple #the person initiating is whoever didn't from the best first kiss

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