#yeah only straight white people are good at fighting all the gays would just paint thier nails u should go out on the front lines bc ppl of

[yutamayo]

Unpopular opinion I think it's a good thing to ban transgender people from the military. I think they should ban all gay people and people of color too. Let the straight white cis men kill each other for honor and patriotism and rich people who will never know their names.

It's amazing fr this way we won't have to kill them they just doing it themselves for free that's a good deal if I ever saw one.

[castiellesbian]

i feel like i need a glossary of terms or a contact list for all these people involved with the show. i have shit memory and dont pay attention to the credits who is sera (sara??) and why does everyone hate her!! why is he Bobo!!!!!! please... has anyone posted about this im desperate

lol well including everyone involved with the show would be difficult, but I’ll give you some highlights

Eric Kripke: creator of Supernatural, showrunner for seasons 1-5. People have differing opinions about him but general people enjoyed his run and he’s considered the best showrunner in the series overall. Not much to say because there’s a lot to say lmao (notable episodes: “Pilot,” “Lazarus Rising,” and “Swan Song”)

Sera Gamble: writer who was involved from the beginning of the show, became showrunner after Kripke left. Her seasons, 6 and 7, are typically regarded as the weakest seasons. She was a huge brothers-only supporter, and was responsible for Misha being written out of the show (as well as Jim Beaver, Bobby) in order to get the show to just be about the brothers again. There’s a lot of drama regarding her treatment of Misha/Cas, but more recently she’s known for the Magicians debacle, a horrendous example of the Bury Your Gays trope. She’s also involved with (the showrunner of?) You on Netflix. She was a pretty good writer, but overall fans dislike her because of her showrunning tenure (notable episodes: “Faith” with Raelle Tucker, “Death’s Door,” “The Born-Again Identity”)

Jeremy Carver: writer from season 3 that was promoted to showrunner from seasons 8 through.... some time in 12, the timeline has been a little murky to me. He was the one who brought Cas back into the main plot, as well as allowing the deancas storyline to become genuine subtext (we can argue whether it was queerbaiting or what he was intending to do if he had been running the series finale, but yeah). Unfortunately, he was also the showrunner when Charlie was killed off brutally, which dampens his legacy. People are conflicted about his seasons, but generally he’s looked upon favorably (not related, but the picture that comes up when you search him on google is NOT him, he’s really like a typical white nerdy looking dude lol) (notable episodes: “The Rapture,” “Sacrifice,” “Do You Believe in Miracles?”)

Andrew Dabb: writer from season 4, promoted to showrunner during season 12 and is the last showrunner of Supernatural (he wrote the finale). He was well-liked by deancas fans for awhile because of how much screentime they were allowed to give, and because of the focus on extended/found family. Sam and Dean only fans didn’t like him for the same reasons. Unfortunately, HIS legacy has been marred by the awful series finale, though it’s debated whether that was his fault or because of network meddling. (notable episodes: “Dark Side of the Moon” with Daniel Loflin, “The Prisoner,” “Moriah”)

Robert Singer: executive producer since the beginning of the show (he’s also co-showrunner throughout Supernatural, but I don’t think he typically was involved with the plotlines too often). He’s directed quite a few episodes, including the infamous wire fight episode (s13 finale) as well as the series finale. Married to Eugenie Ross-Leming, writer of the show

Eugenie Ross-Leming/Brad Buckner: writing partners TECHNICALLY from season 1, but they only wrote one episode until they were brought back in season 7. They are regarded as the worst writers in all of Supernatural, responsible for tactless death scenes of fan-favorites (and typically minorities) like Kevin, Charlie, and Eileen. They also feature a gross amount of dubcon/noncon, racism, weird unnecessary sex stuff, and are SUPER into Lucifer for some unknown reason (they have a crush on Mark Pellegrino I guess). They’re also just kind of bad writers in general, their pacing is weird and their plots convoluted. To be fair, though, they have written some good moments, like Dean trying to reach Cas in Hell’s Angel and Dean’s confessional scene in Paint It Black. But overall, they suck. Why are they still on the show even though BOTH sides of the fandom (who never agree on ANYTHING) dislike them? Well, because Eugenie is married to Singer. Nepotism. (notable episodes, the ones I can stand to watch lmao: “Holy Terror,” “Hell’s Angel,” “Our Father Who Aren’t in Heaven”)

Ben Edlund: writer from season 2 who left after season 8, but people STILL talk about him simply because he is arguably the strongest writer of the series. Cas fans particularly like him because he did most of the heavy-lifting regarding Cas’ characterization. He also wrote the famous bi!Dean scene with Aaron in season 8, where Dean is flustered after being flirted with. (notable episodes: “On the Head of a Pin,” “The French Mistake,” and my all-time favorite “The Man Who Would Be King”)

Robert “Bobo” Berens: writer from season 9, his first episode was “Heaven Can’t Wait,” which is all you really need to know about his influence on the deancas storyline. He’s also gay, so people particularly enjoy seeing how he approaches destiel in his episodes since it’s not just another straight guy potentially just catering to fans. He was also the one who was meant to go off and run Wayward Sisters, and is responsible for a lot of their development in recent seasons. I believe he also created Rowena? He wrote the episode this season where Cas confesses his love to Dean (along with other heavy deancas episodes like “The Trap”). Sam fans typically don’t like him because he doesn’t give him much focus. (notable episodes: “Heaven Can’t Wait,” “Who We Are,” “Wayward Sisters” with Andrew Dabb)

Steve Yockey: writer from season 12 through the beginning of season 15. Also gay, and also responsible for deancas moments in recent years. Generally loved for his deancas subtext but ALSO because he is an amazing writer who came out with iconic episodes. (notable episodes: “Celebrating the Life of Asa Fox,” “Lily Sunder Has Some Regrets,” “Peace of Mind” with Meghan Fitzmartin)

Robbie Thompson: writer from seasons 7 through 11, and wrote some fan favorite episodes in the meantime. He is also the creator of fan favorite characters like Charlie and Eileen. He was also one of the few writers who was vocally supportive of destiel during his tenure rather than just later. I’m not implying anything about his intentions, but it was validating for him to encourage fans during a time where most of the cast/crew ignored or actively dismissed it. Plus his episodes are just fun! (notable episodes: “LARP and the Real Girl,” “Fan Fiction,” “Baby”)

Meredith Glynn: writer since season 12, has worked closely with Bobo during their seasons together. She and Bobo cowrote “The Future,” which is the mixtape episode, so she has been taken in by deancas fans haha. She also wrote the episode where Cas makes the deal with the Empty, so it’s pretty safe to say she and Bobo had worked on the deancas plotline together :) She’s also liked some deancas-related tweets on twitter, so she’s being subtly supportive (notable episodes: “Regarding Dean,” “The Future” with Robert Berens, “Byzantium”)

Davy Perez: writer since season 12 (a lot of the ones I’ve mentioned are, since this is when Dabb became showrunner and made changes in the writers room). His episodes tend to either be horror or bizarre. I mention him because he’s responsible for episodes like “Stuck in the Middle (With You)” (Cas’ first “I love you”) and “Tombstone” (aka Brokebacknatural lmao). I don’t know much about him otherwise, but that’s why he’s brought up usually (notable episodes: “Stuck in the Middle (With You),” “Tombstone,” “Atomic Monsters”)

hopefully this helps, and hopefully I didn’t forget about anyone major. There have been a LOT of people behind the scenes so it’s hard to say who to include. Like, I didn’t mention Jerry Wanek, Jim Michaels, Kim Manners, Thomas J. Wright, or others who might be mentioned from time to time.

[lillian-nator]

Wallflower AU (aka highschool au made w/ @bellfort3)

V i b e s - hanging on the roof; walking across train tracks; skipping school; Lakes, yes, something with lakes; something with different types of sodas. - My angsty teens are gonna have painted nails - Tommy bleaches his hair; Wilbur dyes his hair black - dramatic fuck. - Wilbur in eyeliner plz - Wilbur wears doc martens; black, yellow, maroon, silver shiny - Tommy's worn the same exact jean jacket for the past 5 years; it's 2 sizes bigger than he is; but he wears it every single day; it has fur on the inside; and its light washed with tears; the tears didn’t come like it; he's just ripped it over the years - He doesn't wash it very often, but he's glued patches on it, and Wilbur's drawn on it in sharpie. He just layers hoodies or flannels under it when it’s cold, but still wears it when it's hot - Tommy's also worn the same shoes for YEARS, they’re duct taped together at this point, they're white converse, they're not white anymore, and he's bleach-washed them SO many times that they permanently smell like chemicals. - The laces are frayed, so bad that he doesn’t even wear the laces most days. - Tommy doesn't shy from going in mud or water though, he'll wear the shoes to their fullest and then some. - I think you can tell by now, that Tommy just doesn’t come from a lot of money. - They live in a kind of run down town, very poor, old, smallish. - Wilbur is middle class, which is very well off in the area he lives in. - Wilbur gives off family disappointment vibes. Where he has to sneak out at night, Tommy can leave through his front door. - Wilbur calls Tommy “sunshine”, but very sarcastically since Tommy is a dick :) - Tommy has one of Wilbur's old beanies; it's black and monster branded, the monster logo is green - Wilbur gave it to Tommy 3 years ago, and Tommy never gave it back - btw Tommy's 17 and Wilbur's 19: Tommy's a junior and Wilbur's a senior - Wilbur only drinks Green Apple Monster - Tommy drinks sugar free redbull, but mostly only when Wilbur buys it for him, because Tommy usually doesn't have pocket change - Wilbur and Tommy bring speakers to the train tracks and dance and by that, its them jumping around and occasionally pushing someone over - Tommy uses his allowance to buy cigarettes; Wilbur vapes - both mentally ill - Wilbur is essentially the modern emo. He has this one yellow and black flannel that's oversized, and he wears it multiple times a week - it’s a problem.

- Dream, Wilbur, Karl, Tommy, Big Q, SapNap, Punz, and Tubbo - That’s the group. - I have just been talking about Tommy and Wilbur but they are the main characters so you can suck it. - A scene with Dream, Wilbur, Karl, Tommy, Big Q, SapNap, Punz, and Tubbo, at a lake, throwing each other in, and Tommy gets his shoes soaked, but he saves his jacket from the fall. Water gun fights, and they drink energy drinks and eat chips. they lay in the grass and contemplate life, Talk abt life yes. Abt existence. Abt how shit it is. Half of them have to wake up early and sneak home, the other half get to stay as long as they like. - Tommy tucks his t-shirts into his pants, which are always very baggy black jeans with just gigantic holes. - Tommy and Dream both have ADHD, however, Tommy's meds are purely from welfare, he cannot afford to give any out. Dream however? From an upper-middleclass family. Basically millionaires in this town. He can afford to lose some of his meds. - He yells in the clearing "COME GET YOUR DRUGS CHILDREN" - Besides, I've learned that there are like so many different ADHD meds, and maybe Tommy is just on something a lot stronger than adderall. He can't partake in the pill popping, but he doesn't mind. He does it every morning. - They don't do it often, maybe once a month, depends on how big Dream's prescription is - not that he regularly takes them like a good boy should - And I won't ever write this, but Gogy hangs out with them every so often, in which Gogy and Wilbur have an on and off again hooking up type relationship - whenever they hang out, Gogy like sits and Wilbur's lap and shit - Tommy and Punz GAG - "EW the fuck - get your hands off eachother. ITS GROSS - NO PDA IN MY BACKYARD"

- They hang out in an abandoned Building. But they don't try to fix it up. They're not fucking VSCO girls. They just want somewhere to hang out - If anything they make it worse - they fucking trash the place - It’s not intentional though - It’s like they can have fun without worrying abt the mess - just, sometimes they spill hawiian punch mixed with vodka everywhere - THEY GHOST HUNT AND OUIJA BOARD AND SHIT - They hang out in cemeteries too. they play manhunt in a cemetery, but like the regular version- like just hide and go seek in the dark. - they've done seances even though almost all of them are atheists - anyways the point of the fact is, is that half of them (excluding the minors you know) I'm looking at you Karl and Q - somethings going on between you two have made out with guys, and I'm not gonna sugar coat it, most modern like takes on religion do not take kindly to that

- they go to prom - and Dream somehow ends up with a ton of weed, because he had just turned old enough, and had the money - and they get fucking high OUT of their minds, like they're never doing it again - like, George and Wilbur definitely hooked up at Wilbur's house, which they aren't supposed to do - because Wilbur's parents will fucking flip that Wilbur is sleeping with a random person. No one is quite sure where SapNap ended up, and Tommy lost one of his shoes. In a panic, they spent the next 3 hours looking for it to find it at the lake by the school - Tommy fucking cradles it to his chest. -  (are wilburs parents homophobic?) (yes maybe a little side of homophobia) (Is wilbur bisexual or gay?) (he is ‘whoever the fuck looks bangable’) (fair enough) (he is ‘gogy my king’) (TRUUUE) - the bleachers - they hang out under the bleachers

- Gogy = Stylish stoner - very popular, but never not high - Karl is like the goody two-shoes of the group, doesn't skip class, and is on the principals list, however, he will NEVER back down from space brownies - its his weakness - Tubbo has a subway pass, and they do that thing where Tubbo swipes it and everyone fucking bolts into the subway, and they take all the trains at like 4am and just hang from the bars and shit - Wilbur still dresses relatively like, nicely and scholarly, which puts everyone off. He wears very loose sweaters with button-ups underneath. with khakis or black jeans and his docs - where his best friend, our Tommy, wears borderline yellow converse, and one bleached two-sizes-too-large jean jacket, and some second-hand-store hoodies, that are always a bit too worn in, but so, incredibly Tommy - Tommy who legit hasn't brushed his hair in years, not with a brush anyways - too frantic to brush his teeth most mornings. but always chewing gum; Tommy's always everywhere at once - ADHD meds only half-working on him, they couldn't afford the good shit - He'll never quite understand Dream handing out his adderall for free, Tommy would kill for the hard shit, but hey, he's never gonna stop his friends from having a good time

- Let's talk about Karl Jacobs - good ole' goody two shoes Jacobs - all of his teachers are constantly trying to get him to stop hanging out with Tommy and gang - every parent teacher conference is "we love your boy, but we are concerned about his friends" - Teachers have meetings with him, about how the people you surround yourself with can change your future - Karl's like, from the good side of town, plays first in the drumline, plays violin on the side, straight a's, clean-white-air-force-ones type of guy. Name brand clothes. Combed hair - Packed lunch every day from his mom; gets dropped off by his mom, kisses her goodbye; Mom is like very involved in school too - PTA parent - it's fucking good kid Jacobs - and he's sneaking off with fucking potheads to go to college parties and abandoned buildings - Does he do drugs? Well, he’s a big fan of treats if you know what I mean :wink wink: - ….you ever see Ted's video about a 500mg edible …. yeah. - big fan of gummy bears and brownies - Karl shows up to Parties and there are shouts of "Fuckin' goody-two-shoes Jacobs is HERE" - a lot of people make fun of him and think they can push him around - He seems like a softie; welcome mat type beat - but fucking watch this man chug 5 cups of whatever you give him, and then still win beer pong - Like his best friend is fucking quackity, he can do the hard shit - its very much a his parents have no clue who he actually is type beat - Look, his parents have no clue where he is ever - And if they even know he’s out, they don’t know where or with who - If his mom is at all involved in the school, she'll hear about Quackity, basically a drug dealer with how much hash weed he hands out on a daily basis. - Tommy has to be contained in order for the school to run smoothly, and Wilbur is a dramatic fuck that sleeps through most of his classes - Tommy has to take frequent breaks - They make him spend 3rd period in the principles office - Like he obviously needs help but he can’t afford it at all. Even the school can’t do anything for him bc he can’t get anything official for himself - like he can't even try to concentrate - He gave up so quickly in high school, bc they don’t have enough time or staff to help him - he tried in middle school - but man, did he give up in highschool - Yeah. He knows it is hopeless. Can't even afford college anyway. he'll just do whatever Wilbur does - here's an idea: Fucking Karl Jacobs showing up to school one morning just absolutely hammered out of his mind - Karl just showing up to first period AP Physics, and he's barely awake, honestly smells so much like weed and booze, and if he breathed anywhere near you, you could just feel the alcohol radiating from his breath - He's extra bubbly, laughs at everything - takes out his notebook to take some sort of notes, and just fucking giggles at the shapes and equations. He is very spacy, he clearly stayed up all night doing something very illegal; he gets up and jumps around. 2nd period band? oh boy - He gets sick at lunch bet - Like everyone got Drunk but Karl got FUCKED up - It was his birthday, bet - He took like 17 shots over the course of like 8 - 12ish hours, and I looked it up, despite karl being super scrawny and probably like 140 - 150ish pounds - which isn't a lot for being 5'11 - will not kill him - BECAUSE, you guessed it, he turned 17 - He didn't sleep, he was awake taking shots and just fucking who knows what until 6am when they stumbled to school - at lunch, 11:30 in the morning - he's head down on the table, miserable - he doesn't have a hangover yet, because it's only been a few hours, but man, is he nauseous - just the smell of food makes his stomach churn - and the thing about fucking Jacobs showing up drunk as hell - is that at least one of his teachers has called his mom about it - SHES PRESIDENT OF THE PTA FOR FUCKS SAKE, ONE OF THEM KNOWS HER - And the teachers aren't stupid, Karl is so obviously drunk - generally Karl is pretty quiet in class; but now he has no distinction between hanging with hs friends and being in class - he's shouting and cracking jokes and is very tempted to kick his chair over - Anyways, Karl fucks himself over, end of story  - ONTO PUNZ’S RELGIEOUS TRAUMA WOOOOOOOOOOOO - It's Punz - fuckin' golden boy Punz; he plays football; and goes to church; and calls his mother "momma"; wears a nice church outfit; and is polite to the bible study mothers that come over on tuesday nights and gets them drinks - just a fuckin' golden boy - A religious family. Go to church every Sunday. Sunday school. Holidays. But. The kid just realizes that they don’t believe in god. Them telling the group like they’re high and he’s like “you know? Some of the shit that’s happened to us proves to me that god rlly isn’t real.” - and Punz like prays every day for Tommy's dad to get his job back; or for Gogy to get better parents; or for Karl to live the life he wants; and NOTHING EVER WORKS. THEY'RE ALL STILL FUCKED. - by the way we will get the the Tommy's dad losing his job later - But Punz's life is controlled by something he doesn't even believe in anymore - because he's still going to the like church breakfasts, and christmas service, and every sunday morning, and helping his mom's ladies bible study, and his parents are talking about sending him to a youth bible camp - - and he doesn't even think he believes in god anymore. - Punz kind of took out his own personal, religious, and family struggles out the way most teenage boys do. Drinking, and lots of sex. - SO I just imagined this like, really dramatic moment, where its the morning after Punz had a one night stand at some sort of party down the street, and he's long past saving his virginity for his wife, but he's buying her the morning after pill, which his church is just so against, and he has like the moment of, "if you do this, you're done." and he does it - he's had a couple of those moments, like, when he first had sex, and when he first smoked weed, or popped a pill, or snuck out at night, or skipped church - but that was the moment of "there is no going back" - like any type of drug or procedure that aborts an embryo, or that blocks fertilization thats already in process in like: the biggest no no in his church community - so once he stepped out of that drug store, he kind of took a breath, and just came to terms with it - "I'm an atheist." - Punz is the pastors son. - he's like, pre-commited to a catholic college - he’s in deep. - so when he first announces it to his friends, one really late night, "I think god might not be my thing." - they just start whistling and say "FINALLY, THE PASTORS SON HAS TURNED AROUND." - Dream just like turns over to him "how many chicks did you fuck to make you realize that?" - Tommy just slings his arm over Punz, "I'm glad you've quit the Jesus shit, Punz. Your better than it." - There’s gotta be this girl ok. He rlly rlly wants to have sex with her but he always backs out. The thing that breaks him. Is that he gets drunk and loses his virginity to someone who is not that girl - like, he likes this girl, and has a good connection with her, and she likes him, and he knows that its gonna be comepletly consentual, and she's like fucking beautiful right? - and she's the one he wants to loose it to and he's a stupid fucking idiot and loses it to some fucking random ass chick that doesn't even go to their school - This triggers a spiral. After that? He slowly starts giving less of a fuck abt everything. He fucked up the one thing you can’t do over and god he’s so painfully aware of it and so painfully aware that he didn’t even fuck up right. - You’re supposed to wait till marriage. Nope. You’re supposed to do it with someone you love and trust. Double nope. He. Fucked. Up. - its just like he wanted to do something bad. he wanted to fuck something up. he was questioning his faith, his like, great and sturdy and always-there faith for the first time, and what better way to test faith than to do something shitty and see what comes of it. and so he was planning and planning and planning how he was gonna do this terrible thing - which is such a good kid thing to do, to put so much thought into your own rebellion - but he wanted this to go perfectly. - Little Pastors Son, Punz, wasn't gonna wait till marriage. - He was gonna have sex with the girl of his dreams before they were even dating - but man did he like her. Did he want her. - And then he fucked some random girl when he was black out drunk. He's fucked everything up - he can't wash this away with confession - he's tainted. He's dirty. - He looks in the mirror and doesn't recognize the heathen staring back. - He hates who he's become. - But he never goes back - he can't. He's dirty. He's wrong. - but the more he goes down the spiral - the more he realizes that one mistake shouldn't have made him feel like that - that if god was real, which he honestly wasn't sure in that department, he wouldn't want Punz to feel like the scum of the earth for doing something wrong. especially when he felt so bad after he did it. This system was fucked. He didn't want to be apart of another cycle - and he's just lying to himself every time he goes to church, and reads a cerse for his mom, and meets with younger kids at the church, and plays flag football with fucking church virgins who are good catholics and follow all their mommas orders - And every night when he says grace he means it less and less. he always does it when his momma asks, but boy does the lords word mean shit to him anymore From Ethan: - A turning point to the others in Punz's breakaway from Catholicism is like - He prays before he eats, usually. Sometimes they wait for him to finish his prayer before eating themselves, just out of politeness. He's a friend, he gets that shred of etiquette - And then one day he just doesn't. They got some fast food for a whole group dinner out at their hangout spot (a warehouse, did you say??) Tommy is staring at it intently but he waits for Punz to pray. Tubbo's already started eating but the rest wait - And Punz just starts eating - Dream nudges him, "No prayer, Pastor's boy?" - "No prayer," Punz mumbles into his food. "I'm trying something new." SO, TOMMYS DAD LOSING HIS JOB ARC W000000000 - it starts with Tommy showing up in a different jacket one day - like you have to understand, he's worn this jean jacket every single day for as long as WIlbur has known him, which is like 6 years - Like Tommy shows up in this giant, khaki work-jacket and it's his dads... - HIS DAD DIDNT DIE - his dad lost his job, which is essentially death to a family who already couldn't sustain themselves - and Tommy shows up to school, face pale and cheeks sunk in and there are visible bags under his eyes - and Wilbur just rushes over immediately and hugs him so tight to his chest - and Tommy just sobs, "pops lost his job -" gasp "I can't - we can't pay the bills this month. everything - its all falling apart Will." - "Hey - hey. Stop. It's gonna be fine. You're gonna be okay. You always are dude." - Tommy does have to get a job - and he probably does drop out of school unofficially, like he just stops going. - he sleeps during the morning classes, and heads into work at 10am - he's a carpenters assistant. it pays well as they need young, able men. but most of the younger citizens in the town go to school - he has to take the day shift because the day shift pays better - he doesn't mind it, he doesn't - it gives him the opportunity to get all of his energy out; but he misses going to school. as much as he hated it, he misses his friends. - and lets be honest, its hard as fuck for his dad to find a new job, he doesn't have a great resume - he didn't graduate from highschool. and he isn;t in top health condition, he definitely doesn't have health insurance - so Tommys stuck with this job for a long time - his dad uses his last paycheck to buy Tommy workboots so tommy feels in debt to him - He’ll get his GED eventually. - I think - The like religious status of the rest of the group brought to you by me - Everyone who I don’t mention is just a hard atheist - Karl and Wilbur are catholic, but to a lesser extent, Wilbur doesn't really go through with lent, and Karl only sometimes does. They go to a different church and go pretty much on holidays only, a sunday a month maybe. - SapNap goes to Punz's church, they've been friends for years. - He goes to sunday school but misses a lot of sermons because of his siblings sports games. - He is involved, but not to the way Punz is - SapNap's mother is in fact in Punz's moms bible group - Punz sometimes doesnt attend the bible group and Sap's mother is all "now you tell that pastor's boy to actually attend next time, got it?" and Sapnap dies a little on the inside - And George is an orthodox christian, but he's pretty much quit due to the blatant homophobia he's seen at his church. 

AND NOW ON WILBUR SOOT AND KARL JACOBS AND BARKING - Wilbur has siblings, fun fact - that we will never talk about or address - but definitely nothing like Wilbur, more the Karl Jacobs type - Wilbur is the oldest. he's always lectured about being 'a good influence on your brother and sister.' - They’re big sports kids. Softball and Basketball (tall genes). Straight Bs; Bed by 10pm; Have never missed school - Parents pride and joy :) - Just good suburban kids, Have friends next door, help the neighbors, attend the cul-de-sac barbecues. - Basically who Wilbur used to be up until highschool (until Wilbur met weed and a good group of stoners) - Sure he was a disappointment and he had no clue what to do with his life - But he was happier - Never really liked being the goody- two-shoes boy next door, he doesn't know how karl does it “Playing good boy like a dog” - Also he used dog terms around Karl - Because he’s “Playing good boy like a dog” - He’ll throw Karl a beer and smile “go fetch” - He laughs so hard when he sees Karl be good in a class or play it up for his parents; Because Wilbur’s so past trying - Wilbur will walk by and just bark at karl. Bet. Just Growls lowly; Walks in a  circle; Anything to make Karl’s parents (or Wilbur’s own) stare at him and scurry away - Karl’s parents push Karl forward and like hold their younger kids close to their chest, whispering “keep close, don’t look at him” - They tell Karl to stay away from kids like him. - And boy do Wilbur’s pa#rents hate it, They push him along and whisper yell at him As he throws his head back and cackles - I mean imagine, like a stereotypical middle class suburban family: House wife, blue collared father, Two kids; in sports jerseys, Girl in braids, boy in khakis - And then there’s Wilbur: Doc Martins, black jeans, collar and sweater, beanie. Definitely high on something - Chains LOTS OF CHAINS - And he's Barking. Fucking Barking At the nice family down the street - And then he takes out his vape right in front of his parents and silently offers Karl a hit with a smirk - Cause Karl’s too busy playing good boy - And as Karl’s family looks back, as Wilbur is corralled by his mom - He flips them off with the biggest smirk uou will ever see - Wilbur's kind of an ass - And Karl really wants a hit of that vape.

[hypnosisbuttd]

Hypnosis is Bullshit

(A gay Hypnosis Story)

“Alright Campers!” Chris shouts to the contestants in the cafeteria “It’s time for your next challenge!”

“What now?” Duncan asks annoyed.

“Aw what? Do you not enjoy my challenge?” Chris says sadly

“No” All of the contestants say simultaneously

“Rude...” Chris says, faking being offended. “Well it doesn’t matter cause you’re doing it anyways! Meet me out by the cabins! No not your housing arrangements, the OTHER cabins.”

Chris then proceeds to disappear.

The Campers leave their cafeteria, but then Duncan and Trent get into a little scuffle outside the doors.

“Don’t fucking push me dude” Trent snapped

“Well if your slow ass wasn’t taking up the entire doorway I wouldn’t have needed to” Duncan responds

“Bastard, you wanna fight me?” Trent threatens

“Try me bitch” Duncan challenges“

Oh my god, break it up you two.” Heather sighs

“You stay out of this you black haired dog eater” Duncan sneers

“AIGHT BITCH YOU WANNA GO?!” Heather says threatening Duncan as Lindsay holds her back.

“Ha, you’re so easy to get a reaction out of” He laughs

“Ugh! I really wish someone would knock you down a peg you brat!” Heather shouts

“Duncan I really think you should back off” Gwen suggests

“Aw come on you know you love it baby”“Ew...” Gwen says backing off.

“Y’all gonna head over to the Cabins, or Am I gonna have to drag your clown asses over there?” Leshawna asks

“Tch, fine” Duncan reluctantly lets up

(Nobody messes with Leshawna)

The campers settles their conflict and head out to the old cabins in the wood. 6 of them have spirals painted on them.

“This challenge is a 1 on 1 hypnosis challenge, each of one of the former screaming gophers will compete with one of the former Killer Bass to hypnotize each other in one hour. Whoever succeeds will be allowed to do whatever they want with the other, whoever does the most embarrassing thing to the other when the timer is up wins, the judge will as always be me.” Chris explains

“As stupid as this challenge is, there is a slight problem Chris” Duncan calls out

“And that is?” Chris asks

“Hypnosis ain’t real you fucking moron.” He shouts

“Yes it is!” Izzy shouts “Ive seen plenty of government facilities use Hypnosis on Politicians to get them favorably on one side of the Spectrum or on enemy soldier to reveal critical information! But I’m completely resistant to it cause I was born colorblind!” Izzy rants

“And we’re supposed to believe the crazy lady why?” Duncan asks

Izzy growls

“Anyways here are your teams”

“Leshawna and Eva, you’ll go to the first cabin”

“Ha good luck, I have an Iron Will” Eva notes

“Team 2 will be Heather and Bridgette”

“Yeah no, I’m not letting this bitch control me. You’re going down Heather” Bridgette threatens

“Team 3 is Lindsay and Izzy”

“This will go down well...” Duncan mutters sarcastically

“Team 4 is Geoff and Gwen”

“Aight little lady! We got this!” Geoff cheers

“I don’t think you understand this challenge” Gwen says

“Team 5 is Owen and DJ”

“Oh fuck no” Trent and Duncan say simultaneously

“And Team 6 will be Duncan and Trent! Ha ha ha” Chris laughs

“Fuck you and your idiot ass McLain” Duncan says flipping the bird at McLain before waking inside the cabin.

“I could have had it worse...” Trent suggests trying to keep it positive.

The two of them wander inside the cabin and did the room lined with various Hypnosis tools.

Duncan just sighs“God this shit it stupid... I mean look at this” He picks up a ray gun “Hypno Gun? My gif what do they think we are? 5? I’m so done with this. Let’s just wait the hour out I don’t even care if we lose”

“Whatever...” Trent sighs.

Duncan sits down on one of the coaches while Trent wanders around the room.

After a bit of searching however, Trent notices a small tape sitting in the corner of the room, he picks it up and the Tape Reads ‘Easy White Noise Hypnosis’. Trent, wanting a bit of laugh but also not caring, removes the label and replaces it with a label he had on one of his other tapes titled ‘Heavy Punk Rock Favorites’.

He then proceeds to sit next to Duncan

“Da fuck do you want?” Duncan snaps

“Well I decided since we’re going to be here a while, I thought you would like to listen to some music. I know you’re a punk rock fan, so I got some of my favorites.” He hands the tape to Duncan

“I mean you’re choice in Music probably sucks but whatever...” Duncan plugs in a pair of headphones into the tape and begins listening.

“Dude this is just white noise, what the fuck is this?” Duncan asks clearly confused

“It’s a start up noise, it’ll probably take a couple minutes to start up” Trent lied

Duncan relents and continues to sit there. After a few minutes, his expression begins to go slack and he sits there looking confused.

“Dude... This shit is making my head feel... funny...” Duncan slurs. He goes to take off the headphones.

“Up bup bup bup” Trent places his hands on his and keeps the headphones “Just keep going”

“But... I...”

“Ssshhh” Trent shush him. Duncan giggles a little before continuing on.

After a couple more minutes, Duncan is gone full slack. His eyes are crossed and drool is slowly dripping down the side of his mouth. Trent waves his hand in front of Duncan, he doesn’t even react. He just sits there.

Holy shit did it actually work? Trent thinks. He decides to test his theory.

“Duncan can you hear me?” Trent asks

“Yeah...” Duncan mumbles

“Are you willing to obey my commands?” He asks

“Sure” Duncan slurs

“Stand in front of me...” He orders

Duncan stands up and walks in front of Trent.

No way... Trent thinks This can’t be real. I guess the only way to know is if I make him do something so embarrassing that if he’s pranking me he’ll have to let up...

“Alright Duncan listen to me. When I snap my fingers, you will become a Sexy Gay stripper who’s here to strip for me. You love showing your bare ass for people and you’re super horny. Ok?”

Duncan just drools

Theres no way... Trent thinks

Trent snaps his fingers and Duncan wakes up and stares directly at Trent. He then placed Hands on either side of Trent

Yup he’s definitely going to kill me

“Why Hello there Sexy” Duncan purrs

OH MY GOD Trents Mind Screams

Duncan stands up and admired Trent “Damn when they sent me for this job, I didn’t expect my client to be so sexy.” He says seductively

“Thank you...” Trent says trying to hold in his laughter

“Anyways let’s get on with the show shall we?” Duncan says pulling off his shirt slowly.

Trent just stares in awe as Duncan slowly pulls off his clothes. First he tosses off his shirt and lets Trent feel his pecs. Then he pulls off his pants and gives Trent a lap dance. Finally when Trent thought it was going to end, Duncan leaned in by his ear“

Since you’re such a special client case, I’ll give you a bonus show.” He whispers seductively.

Duncan stands up and pulls off his underwear, bearing his ass for Trent to see. He throws the underwear off to the side and exposes himself directly in front of Trent.

“Like what you see?” Duncan says winking

Trent could feel himself getting hard.

Wait what?

Trent looked down to see himself indeed having a hard on at the site of Duncan

What the? I’m straight! What the heck is going on?

Duncan leans in quietly and sets himself on Trents lap“What do you say me and you find the bedroom, and take care of that little problem of yours” Duncan says pulling at the edge of Trents pants

“Alright that’s enough! Sleep!” Trent calls out

Duncan immediately falls limp, his body crashing into Trents chest. Trent realized how Tiny Duncan was especially without the clothes and laughed to himself a little.

Hmm what should I do with you now? Trent thinks.

He looks down at Duncan’s muscular form. And immediately comes up with a devilish plan.

“Alright Duncan… You can still hear me correct?” He asks

“Ye…” Duncan slurs.

“Alright, when I wake you up, you will think you are a professional wrestler. And I am your opponent. You will try and punch and dent but will not have enough strength to do so. Meanwhile when I even slightly tap you, you will feel excruciating pain. And the only way You can make it stop is by me surrendering. Understood?” Trent explains.

Duncan moans.

“Ok… Then go…” Trent snaps his fingers.

Duncan sits up instantly and stares directly at Trent. He smiles and growls.

“Look at you. Little Princess. You think you can beat me?” Duncan sneers.

Trent stands up. “Psh, you’re all talk…” He laughs.

“Oh yeah. Then let’s see how you like this?” Duncan aims a punch directly for Trents face, but when he touches his face, it’s no more than a slight touch. Duncan backs up.

“You’re sturdy…” He mutters.

“Wanna try that again?” He asks

“Grr TAKE THIS!!!” Duncan runs up to him and grabs him around the arms. He attempts to lift Trent up, but fails miserably.

Trent just laughs and flicks Duncan’s nose. Duncan backs up and covers his nose in pain.

“Dude what the fuck?! How did you do that?” He says rubbing his nose.

“Just luck I guess.” Trent slaps Duncan’s back and he collapses to the ground writing in pain.

“OK DUDE I SURRENDER!! PLEASE JUST STOP!!!” Duncan screams.

Trent pulls Duncan’s legs over his shoulders and Duncan writhes in pain.

“Say it!” Trent snaps

“Say what?” Duncan whimpers.

“Say you’re a princess…” He tugs on his leg.

Duncan winces hard. “GAAAH! Fine! I’m a Princess! I’m a pretty little bitch princess.”

“Why couldn’t Mario find you?”

“I was in another castle! Obviously!”

“And what we’re you doing there?”

“Probably getting fucked by You.” He laughs.

Trent stands there silent for a moment as he drops Duncan lies on the ground writhing.

“I surrender.” He mumbles.

Duncan’s pain vanishes and he quietly gets up and turns to Trent.

“You ok dude?” He asks

“Why did you say I was getting fucked by you? Why the fuck would you say that?” He growls.

“Dude, I just think your hot. I’m not tryna make you mad. If anything, I think you’d make a great top!” Duncan laughs.

Trent just sighs. “Sleep…”

Duncan falls forward and collapses into Trents arms. Trent quietly sits him on the floor and sits next to him thinking.

Did he really mean that? Trent thinks

He looks over at Duncan, who’s drooling on the floor and looking spaces out. Trent quietly contemplates for a moment before realizing his final trick. The thing he would do for Chris’s competition.

“Alright Duncan, can you hear me?” Trent asks.

“Mm…” Duncan quietly mumbles.

“Great then here’s what we’re gonna do.”

(Time skip to the end of the competition ton)

“Aaaaaand Times Up!” Chris blows his air horn. “Let’s see what we got now!”

“Duncan was right! You’re bullshitting McLain!” Gwen snaps.

“None of that stuff worked! All of the tools were fake!” Leshawna explains.

“Yeah! And I should know! I know what Hypnosis stuff looks like!” Izzy shouts.

“Really? It was supposedly real when I bought it online.” Chris says nervously.

“Yeah well I can guarantee that not a single one of us completed the challenge.” Bridgette snaps

“Actually I did!” Trent raised his hand.

Everyone turns to look at him in surprise.

“You can’t be serious…” Heather says tiredly.

“I am! And I have proof!” Trent quietly walks down the steps, a small figure crouches down behind him.

“Is that…” Gwen attempts to peak around.

Trent calls the small figure. “Come on, don’t be shy…”

The figure crawls quietly to Trents feet and reveals itself to be Duncan, but he’s different. His usual green Mohawk, now he had his air in a sort of wild style, kind of slicked back, but with a bit of a tip. But that was the least of the Changes. He was completely naked except for a pair of black ears and a large black tail stuck into his ass. And he had a collar with a bone collared name tag on it saying “Damian” attached to a leash that Trent was holding.

“No way…” Izzy says shocked.

“His name is Damian now. He’s a cutie aint he?” He says scratching Damian behind the ears. Damian pants in happiness.

“This isn’t real…” Heather says laughing.

“It is. I Hypnoed him to be a good boy. I taught him a couple tricks while I had the time.” Trent explains.

He points to in front of him and Damian walks up and “stands” on all fours in front of Trent.

“Sit…”

Damian sits like a dog looking at Trent expectantly.

“Roll over.”

Damian lies down then rolls onto his back, then rolls back onto his stomach and sits up.

“Speak!”

Damian barks.

“Wag your tail!”

Damian sticks his butt up in the air, and begins wagging his fake tail. Damian looks at Trent happily.

“Good boy!”

Trent pulls a cookie out of his pocket and dangles it in front of Damian. Damian grabs it and begins munching on the cookie. Once he’s finished, Trent pulls out a large beef bone and hands it to Damian. Damian takes it in his mouth and quietly circles around Trent before lying at his feet and viciously chewing on the bone.

“This is insane!” Owen looks in shock.

“HES SO CUTE!!!” Lindsay squeals.

“Oh how the tables have turned…” Heather smirks.

Chris looks at Trent in shock. He regains his composure and smiles at Trent. “Well then! Congratulations, Trent! You have won immunity!” Chris announces.

“And Damian, he’s my dog, after all.” Trent reaches down and scratches Damian behind the ears again. Damian whines in happiness.

“Ugh… Fine! Damian gets Immunity too… You have to change him back by the end of the week though!” Chris adds.

“Yeah yeah…” Trent waves it off.

(One week later, after Eva is eliminated)

Trent walks up to Damian, who had been quietly sleeping under Trents bunk. He ques for Damian to come out and Damian shuffles out and quietly waits for Trents command.

“Alright welp its time for you to go back to normal…”

Damian frowns and cries at Trent.

“I know I know… But Chris said it’s the requirement…” Trent says petting Damian.

Reluctantly, Damian sits back in normal position.

“Goodbye for now Damian…”

Damian barks one more time and nuzzles into Trents hand.

“And sleep…”

Duncan’s eyes roll over and he returns to sleep mode.

“Alright Duncan, I want you to take all the memories of you as Damian and tuck them safely away. It’ll be there, but you can’t open it unless I ask you to. Ok?” Trent explains.

Duncan mumbles what sounded like a yes.

“And other than that, when I snap my fingers, you will wake up as your Normal self, with all the memories of what you did. Ok?” Trent asks

Duncan nods.

“Ok, and go.” Trent snaps his fingers.

Duncan’s eyes snap back to reality and he looks at Trent in disgust.

“The fuck is up with-“ He stops as his memories come in “OH FUCK YOU!!!” Duncan gets up and lightly shoved Trent. Trent laughs.

“Yup! I got you!” Trent says.

“Oh god! How the fuck did That work?” Duncan asks

“Honestly? I just kinda got lucky! But I wasn’t wasting a golden opportune moment like this!” Trent laughs.

“Tch, whatever.” Duncan crosses his arms. But shockingly his expression softens.

“Hey… about that Damian thing…” He mumbles.

“What about it?” I ask strangely.

“Do you think you could do it again sometime…” He asks quietly.

Trent looks at him surprised “You’re not serious?!” Trent says shocked.

“Yes I am. I kinda like being Damian. I know I act like a bad boy all the time but, to be Damian would be like having just… a lay off of that I guess…” Duncan mumbles.

Trent seems to think for a moment, before nodding and reaching his hand out towards Duncan. “Deal!”

Duncan grasps his hand and shakes it. “Thanks.”

Duncan begins quietly walking out when Trent stops him.

“Aren’t you gonna put on clothes?” Trent laughs.

Duncan looks back at him and smirks.

“Dogs don’t wear clothes”

(END)

[lady-divine-writes]

Klaine one-shot “Artistic Differences” (Rated NC17)

Summary: Kurt and Blaine have known each other all their lives. They've loved each other almost as long. But as Blaine uses his love for Kurt as inspiration for his music, Kurt has yet to reciprocate. And since painting is Kurt's entire world, Blaine is worried about what that might mean for the two of them. (2703 words)

Notes: I had been writing this for the @klaineadvent Drabble Challenge 2020 prompt 'opinion'. I finally finished it. Wee! XD

Read on AO3.

Baby, you're not alone...

'Cause you're here with me...

And nothing's ever gonna bring us down...

'Cause nothing can keep me from lovin' you...

And you know it's true...

It don't matter what'll come to be...

Our love is all we need to make it through...

Blaine stops singing when he notices an echo haunting his lyrics, lingering on the high notes for longer than written. He listens with eyes closed, smiling at his keyboard. 

His boyfriend Kurt, humming behind the melody. 

Blaine has been ironing this song out for the past three hours now but Kurt hasn't complained once about the constant stopping and starting.

He never does. 

Blaine peeks over his shoulder as he continues to play with the harmonies and watches Kurt, focused on the canvas in front of him, swaying to the rhythm of the music, happily sandwiched between his two passions - art and music.

It's a mild and sunny Saturday - a whole day devoted to cleaning up commissions and tying loose ends on weekly projects before their one day off together. Blaine and Kurt share a studio space - normally unheard of for an artist and a musician, but they make it work. It helps that they've known one another for so long that being alone together is the same as being alone with themselves. That also means they get the inside scoop on what the other is working on long before the public does.

And what they're not working on, which has begun to bother Blaine.

Blaine adores everything his talented boyfriend comes up with. Even regarding his more controversial works, there isn't a thing Kurt has painted that Blaine finds objectionable. Kurt puts his heart and soul into every painting, no matter who it's for, and no matter the subject. A writer from Artforum once wrote: "Kurt Hummel goes beyond the veil to showcase not just the external, but the core of every subject - their drives and motivations. It pairs nicely with the transparency of his own soul, which shines through the gouache and the gesso to leave the viewer with a tangible piece."

And therein lies the root of Blaine's problem.

A glance at one of Kurt's canvasses and the world knows everything it needs to about what he loves.

But one subject in particular has gone wholly unrepresented.

“How come you've never painted a portrait of me?” Blaine asks.

"Hmm... what's that, love?" Kurt mutters, switching out brushes, then moving from a blob of Titanium White to a smear of Winsor Blue.

"How come you've never painted a portrait of me?" Blaine rises off his piano bench and relocates to the wooden folding chair behind Kurt's easel in the hopes of pulling his attention a bit. "You've been an artist for as long as I've known you, and I've known you your entire life. But not once have you ever painted a portrait of me."

“Why do I need to? I have you right here," Kurt says, pretending to bop the tip of Blaine's nose with his brush. "Besides, these aren’t personal." His gaze bounces between the three canvases set on easels in an arc in front of him. "They’re bought and paid for.”

"But what about your private stuff? You've shown me your sketchbooks and your digital art files. Unless you have some hidden folder marked 'secret boyfriend art' that I've yet to come across, there's not a single piece of me in any of your work."

Kurt doesn't steer his gaze away from the apple he's adding highlights to to acknowledge his pouty boyfriend, but the corner of his mouth hitches. "If you say so, dear."

"I know so," Blaine grumps, crossing his arms over his chest and dropping back in the chair so hard he nearly topples it over.

"That's your opinion."

"You're evading."

"Is it really so important to you?"

"Yes! It would be nice to be immortalized by my artist boyfriend!"

Kurt snickers. "Are you that much of a narcissist?"

"Your art is important to you! More than that - it's your life! You paint everything that you love! You've made dozens of paintings of Finn, your father, your mother, your Navigator... "

"My Navigator is my baby. It deserves love. I don't get to drive it much living in the city," Kurt defends. "Besides, those paintings I posted on Instagram landed me a huge contract with Lincoln, and that paid for our month-long tryst to Bali. You're welcome, by the way."

"I'm not saying I'm not grateful... " Blaine pauses, the smile on his face a souvenir from thirty straight days of overindulgence in sex and alcohol. "I think I more than proved that on that private beach? Under the moonlight?"

"Yeah, you did," Kurt growls, silently hoping that will be the end of this discussion.

"But... " Blaine picks up and Kurt's heart sinks.

No luck.

"... nowhere am I present in your work. Not that I've seen. Not even in the abstract. And that makes me think... " 

"Think what?" Kurt mutters, his playful attitude fading the longer this conversation drags on.

Blaine sighs, realizing how much like a spoiled toddler he sounds. But he's in too deep to stop now. "That you don't expect me to be around long."

Kurt's snicker turns into a full-blown chortle. "We've been together forever! You staked a claim on me in kindergarten! Are you suddenly going somewhere?"

"Can't you take this seriously?"

"No."

"Why not?"

"Because it's ridiculous!"

Blaine huffs. "Great. So my feelings are ridiculous."

"No, Blaine, your feelings are valid. This argument is ridiculous. Believe it or don't, you don't know everything about me. Or my work. What does it matter what I put on a canvas? I told you that I love you! That I would always love you! I tell you over and over and over! Those are my words! My truth! Listen to my truth!"

"B-but what if you change your mind?" Blaine grimaces when that toddler inside him begins throwing an all-out tantrum.

"Then I change my mind!" Kurt groans, slamming his free hand down on an open tube of Dandelion Green, sending a thick ribbon of paint a good four feet. "I'm allowed to change my mind! And so are you! But I don't see that happening!"

"Then why won't you marry me?"

Kurt pulls a face, probably without thinking about it. "Because I'm not very fond of marriage."

"Why not? Your parents had a great marriage! And your father has a wonderful second marriage!"

"But your parents don't have a very good marriage, do they? Nor your older brother, who's been divorced twice already! " Kurt argues, frustration causing him to forget himself and clean his stained hand on the untucked hem of his shirt instead of a rag. That should be a huge red-flag for Blaine to back down, yet he doesn't. Common sense? Sorry, don't know her. "And the national average isn't that great, either. Doesn't it mean more that I choose to stay with you instead of feeling obligated to?"

Blaine doesn't have an answer for that, even though the answer is obviously yes. Of course, it does. And in high school, that would have been enough to shut Blaine up. But admitting to that feels too much like conceding, and this one time, this is an argument he wants to win. "Did you hear that song I've been working on?" Blaine asks, switching gears so quickly, it puts Kurt on edge.

"Yes," Kurt replies, his voice becoming tight quickly. "It's lovely."

"I wrote it for you."

"Thank you. It sounds wonderful. Another huge hit in the making."

"It's the 15th song I've written in your honor."

"Wow," Kurt says dryly, predicting the direction this is heading. "That many?"

"Yes."

"Well, that's an incredibly kind and loving gesture, one that I didn't know required reciprocation."

"It doesn't require reciprocation. But it would be nice."

Kurt rolls his eyes at Blaine's agenda. Tit for tat. Is that how this is supposed to work? "From what I remember, those songs made you a pretty penny."

"So?"

"So, it's not like you wrote them for me and kept them between us. Most of those songs are chart-toppers."

"But I didn't release them for the money! I wouldn't care if they didn't make me a dime! I put them on the albums because I'm not afraid to let the world know how I feel about you!"

Kurt's brow furrows as he fights through a blooming headache to decode that declaration. Once he gets it, he gasps. "I'm not hiding you away if that's what you're implying! You go with me EVERYWHERE! Every gallery opening, every art show! There have been articles written about our relationship! You're no dirty little secret!"

"I never said I was."

"No?" Kurt chuckles bitterly. "You're sure implying it a great deal!"

"That's not what this is about."

"You're right. It's not. Blaine!" Kurt tosses his brush into a mug of water and starts pacing the floor. "I am a gay artist walking a very fine line."

"I'm a gay artist, too!" Blaine says, offended.

"But you're a musician. And a songwriter. Musicians are supposed to use love as their muse. Writing about your relationship is expected... unless you're Taylor Swift, apparently."

"Yeah. What's up with that?"

Kurt shrugs. "I don't know. The point is that the second I make a piece of art about our relationship in any way, shape, or form, I'm afraid that's all it will be about, no matter what I intend."

"Isn't art supposed to be subject to interpretation?"

"That's just it! If I hint that my art has anything to do with you, that will become the only interpretation. Because too many straight people see the homosexual experience as solely about the right to fuck who we want to fuck and nothing else. I make a portrait about you or dedicated to you, and after that... " Kurt's eyes leave Blaine's face, scanning the room and his canvasses all around for help making his argument. He finds a painting of a forest they hiked through in Bali and stops there "... a tree that I paint will no longer be just a tree. It will become a symbol. In a forest of evergreens, if one needle is slightly browner than the rest because the paint oxidizes weirdly or whatever, then it'll be about you and me on the skids and nothing else. And I don't want that to happen."

Blaine turns in his chair to find the painting Kurt is staring at. On the surface, it's trees, dirt, and sky, but underneath, it's much more than that. That painting of their beloved paradise is perfection - so much so that he can feel the sun on his face, the breeze kissing his cheek, smell the sunscreen on his skin. "I understand what you're saying, but... "

"But?" Kurt grinds out between his teeth. This is the frustrating thing about arguing with Blaine. Even when he says he sees Kurt's point of view, he doesn't seem to really.

And when he's not winning, he gets dismissive.

"... I think you're overthinking things a little."

"And you're not?"

"Another evade," Blaine says, pointing at him in a way reminiscent of his brother's only acting technique.

Kurt grabs the hair at his temple and pulls to keep from flinging the palette in his hand like a frisbee at Blaine's head. "Isn't it more important that you know how I feel about you? You inspire me every day! Your love, your support, your music - they feed my soul! But do I have to plaster it on a wall to make it real?"

"That's kind of an empty question because you don't! There are no paintings of me! Not even in our apartment! And I'm sorry, but I think that's very telling!"

Kurt nods, his lips pulled taut. "You're right, Blaine. Not one. And it is very telling." He drops his palette on his work table and circles the room, grabbing finished canvases and carrying them over. He positions them purposefully, placing some under UV lights he has mounted to runners on the ceiling. 

"What... what are you doing?" Blaine asks with worry, wondering if Kurt is about to do something hasty, something that will ruin his paintings, waste all those hours of work, jeopardize the money he has yet to collect for them. 

Kurt doesn't answer. 

He doesn't even look at him. 

He works silently, his shoulders rigid, his footsteps heavy as he collects paintings Blaine forgot about, paintings that had made Blaine bristle because they were of places they had been to together, things they had made a point to see only with each other, but not a one included him. Those Kurt flips upside down.

He swipes a squeeze bottle of clear liquid from his army of supplies. It could be water. It could be paint thinner. Blaine doesn't know, but he's not certain he wants to find out. He's about to leap off his seat to stop him, but Kurt switches off the overhead lights, turns on the UVs, and Blaine stops. He watches in horror as Kurt douses the flipped canvases in fluid, but the paint doesn't run. Whatever is in that bottle, it sticks, but only in certain areas, and before it dries completely, Kurt dusts the paintings with a fine powder, one that brings hidden images to life beneath the lights.

“Oh my God,” Blaine mutters, stepping back to get a better look.

Every painting, in one way or another, is of him. Of them. And not just recently. There are images of them from college, high school... middle school. There are profiles of Blaine in the negative space between flowers of one painting, and in the clouds of another. A fluorescent image of teenaged him playing guitar to a silhouette of Kurt sitting beside him. There are shadows of them dancing, singing, even a daring one of them making love up against a wall. 

And the flipped landscapes? Their vacation pictures, as it were? The glowing dust reveals portraits hiding in plain sight, painted upside down and invisible to the naked eye. All of these images, Kurt painted in ways where no one would detect them if they weren't looking for them. If they didn't know they were there.

And they are in every. single. one.

Now that he's seen this, it's safe to assume all of Kurt's works carry similar Easter eggs, even paintings long gone.

"Why... why didn't you tell me about this?" Blaine asks, too stuck on stupid to move, walk from painting to painting and examine them properly.

"Why did I need to? I love you. I've told you. What else did I need to prove?"

Blaine shakes his head slowly, ashamed of himself. What an imbecile he is! Kurt is absolutely right. He loves him! He didn't need to prove it! The hurt Blaine felt - that was on him. It wasn't Kurt's responsibility to fix it. There isn't a day that goes by where Kurt doesn't show his love to Blaine in one way or another. Blaine didn't need this. He really didn't.

And right now, he doesn't feel he deserves it.

On a side note, how wrapped up in his own crap has he been that here, in this space that they share, where proximity has forced Kurt to memorize every song Blaine has been writing for his latest album while he paints, that he never realized just how frickin' talented his boyfriend is!?

"Kurt... " Blaine finally finds the strength to take a step forward, drawn to that ghostly image of them making love. It's a simple shadow of the moment, but it evokes a powerful memory "... these are incredible. How did you... ?" Blaine expects an answer before he can finish. Kurt is rarely shy about discussing his work.

Though Blaine should use this opening to his advantage - apologize since those should have been the first words out of his mouth.

But he gets nothing.

"Kurt?" Blaine looks over his shoulder in search of his boyfriend, ready to make amends. 

But Kurt is gone.

[whyispickingausernamesohard]

Remember when we were having friends vibe check the mechs? Yeah this was with @astronautjaws​

Note that I do talk to this friend about the mechs a Lot so they did know some stuff (a Jonny ramble had happened literally the night before for example). (Also the Sasha mentioned in Ivy's is Sasha Sienna bc I also ramble about them)

Images descriptions under read more, if there’s a better way to format them please let me know!

[Image ID:

Ten images, each with 1 to 5 pictures of a given Mechanism and comments edited over.

Three pictures of Raphaella la Cognizi, featuring both of her wing styles. Comments read “She looks like a Juliet but she’s wearing all red so imma guess Red Rose? Clone or otherwise. Nice wings tho” “Okay but she does look like a Juliet” “Holy fuck Juliet” “wings and just straight up gay vibes, uh idk much about ships positions so imma go sword girl, now thinking about it her mechanism can be sword wlw”

One picture of Gunpowder Tim. Comments read “Jonny, human disaster and feral bastard, cannibal, tax fraud committee, captain?, gay dads that he killed both of” and a conversation between the person sending, “What’s his mechanism” and the person commenting, “Oh fuck. Uh compass?”

Two pictures of Jonny D’Ville. Comments read “he gives me a Nils vibe so let’s go with that, uh I go with him being a navigator but a badass one cause I feel like he would be looking at a map then turn around and shoot whoever was behind him without flinching, I feel like he’s 5′2″ tho which tbh the shorter you are the closer to satan you are so, that gun be his mech.” Comments from the sender read “You have no idea how much discourse there is over how tall he is” and “He has such short ppl energy but Insists he isn’t short (I think I remember seeing his height somewhere but I don’t remember it)”

Three pictures of Ashes O’Reilly. Comments read “they are the one who paved the way to enbies using random nouns as their names and i love it, tbh I was gonna go with like June as their name but I really think August/Auggie is more their vibe, Fucking shit is that a 5 string bass I love them, Their mech better be that bass, Lieutenant? Like is that a position used on this ship?, In regards to my first point their middle name is definitely Quill”

Two pictures of Nastya Rasputina. Comments read “those blue streaks of hair in the first pic bonus points there, she looks innocent but she’s definitely the kind of person who has a first name that’s minimum 3-4 syllables and she has 5 different middle names, Genevieve or Rebekah for sure (yes I did look at a name generator for this cause I can’t think of words let alone names with more than 3 syllables), I feel like her mech is a ring some jewelry, rank??? Seriously I know nothing of rank”

Five pictures of the Toy Soldier. Comments read “Toy Soldier babey, the child, it will either destroy baby yoda or team up with baby yoda for world domination, its mech I feel like is like the metal lumberjack from wizard of oz where it’s a metal heart that ticks, it has no rank cause nothing can contain The Feral Babey/Child - only chaos, timetraveling babey but wherever it lands everybody just goes ‘aw’ and TS commits crimes.” A conversation between the sender, “Yea basically fuck I talk too much about TS,” and the person commenting, “Oh for sure.” Another comment from the sender is placed over two pictures of the Toy Soldier with its hair down. It reads “These two pics in particular unlock secret emotions in me”

Two pictures of Drumbot Brian. In both pictures he is wearing the bronze face paint. Comments read “gold boi, shiny 10/10, I feel like Leo/Leonardo fits him, it might be the beart/long hair but I feel like he’s friends with the lesbians- like Hozier, mech is that drumstick? Cause you can’t play the accordion and drums at the same time?, cook probs, he’s just smiley all the time - he’s definitely the capybara of the group”

Five pictures of Marius von Raum. In two pictures an ace of hearts card is clearly visible in his hat. Comments read “Zack or Max, he’s the one who has been pulling stupid pranks everywhere like whoopie cushions under every seat, I spy with my little eye an ace in his hat so he’s confirmed canon asexual (would have preferred the ace of spades but I’ll take it), his mech is that card, no one wants to give him a rank cause he came on the ship stealing snacks and never left but he’s good at fighting in battle so he can stay” “K he’s aroace”

Three pictures of Ivy Alexandria. Comments read “[many question marks] Hello??, I may have just found a reason to start listening to the mechs, hey wait is this Sasha or nah, eh might as well go with Sasha cause why not, last pic got a knife so the knife is definitely the mech cause knife, That vest! That style! WTF! I love it!, feels like she’s off reading books while the rest of the crew is out fighting and only joins as a last resort. Plus if/when she joins the fight it’s over in 5 minutes cause gotta go back to reading that book before you’re out of the zone and you lose motivation for reading the book and it sits unfinished on a table (adhd mood but still) also if she occasionally fights while reading the book, just a book in one hand and a sword in another fighting off whoever is in front of her never breaking eye contact with the book”

One black and white picture of Dr. Carmilla. Comments read “her mech is the Spencer’s or hot topic gift card cause piercings, and if you don’t like that answer then I’d say it’s a dried/pressed flower or clover that’s been made into a bookmark cause that vibes, feel like her name is Rain or Millie, I feel like she doesn’t have a position but more of a location and that is the crow’s nest cause if you have a ukulele people are going to ask you to play the TOP cover of Falling in Love With You song over and over again or House Of Gold, and there’s no escaping it when you have your ukulele in hand”

End ID]

[artificialqueens]

White Noise (What an Awful Sound) Ch.2 (Crystal/Gigi) - Meta

A/N: I hope everyone enjoyed the first chapter! I’ve been having a lot of fun writing it. Please leave any feedback/opinions/suggests you have, I love reading what people think about my work! :)

“Gigi, breakfast is ready!” The sound of her mother’s voice woke Gigi up. She rolled over to check the time on her phone, 9 am. Ugh, who the hell wakes up this early on a Sunday? Her parents must really be laying into the new “suburban” lifestyle. Breakfast together early every morning, family dinners. Oh maybe they’ll even have movie night! Gigi ignored all the texts she’d received from her friends back home while she was asleep, rolling herself out of bed and walking to the bathroom. She rummaged around in the box labeled “Gigi’s Toiletries” in her mom’s beautiful cursive. Pulling out her face wash and moisturizer before turning to the sink where her toothbrush rested from the night before.

Once back in her room Gigi picked out an outfit for the day. Scanning through the clothes she’d already put away in her closet, she decided on a long, pale green skirt that had a small slit revealing some of her left leg and just a cropped white shirt. Gigi gave herself a quick once over before rushing downstairs.

“My god, would you look at that. Sleeping Beauty has finally joined the rest of the living.” Gigi’s dad said. He was sitting at their dining table sipping coffee out of a mug and scrolling on his phone. Gigi was willing to bet all of her savings he was looking at Facebook. These damn 40’s somethings, always on their goddamn phones. Just shameful.

“There’s so evidence to prove I’m not sleep walking right now.’’ She said, taking a seat next to her father.

“You washed your face, brushed your teeth, and got dressed.” Gigi’s mother replied, poking her head out of the kitchen.

“Right…so what’s for breakfast?” She eyed her father’s plate but he had already eaten what was on it.

“Cereal for you since you decided to take so long.”

“Paul stop it,” Her mom hit his arm playfully before putting a plate of waffles in front of Gigi, “apparently, your father’s version of unpacking the kitchen is only taking out the waffle iron.”

“Hate to say it but I’m not surprised.” Gigi said.

“I am shocked and appalled by how little you two think of me, really. Just wow.” He replied, feigning hurt. Gigi’s dad stood from the table, taking his plate into the kitchen and placing it in the sink. He whispered a small ‘thank you’ before pulling Gigi’s mom in for a kiss. The teen just ignored her parents, public displays of affection were normal in their house. Gigi had a theory that her father was so affectionate to make up for how much time he spent at work back in LA, always hugging, kissing, or holding her mother’s hand just to let her know he’s still there.

“Anyway, Gigi honey, your father and I need to go to the store and get some things for the house. Do you want to come with us?” Gigi just shook her head, she could use this time to unpack her room some more. “Okay, well we should be home before 4. Please don’t forget, we’re going over to have dinner with the Methyd’s at 5.”

“I will be ready, promise.”

Her parents made their way out the front door, her mom yelling something about wearing a jacket if she left the house. Please, like Gigi was gonna leave the house. Where would she go? To hang out with all her friends here in Missouri? No Gigi was going to go back upstairs and unpack her room. She hated living out of boxes, even if it had only been a day. Back home she waited until the very last second to pack up all her things. Nicky, her best friend, had told her to ‘stop stalling and pack your shit already’ to which Gigi argued that she hadn’t been. Now she was willing to admit Nicky had been right. Just because she refused to throw some random crap she’d had all her life into a box didn’t change the fact that the ‘For Sale’ sign outside her house was real. But now Gigi was ready to settle into her new room.

About an hour later Gigi had made good progress on her room. She’d just finished organizing her books when she heard a crash followed by a lot of expletives that she was glad her parents weren’t around to hear. Gigi walked over to her window, trying to see what was going on. She chuckled to herself as she watched Crystal struggle with an easel on her porch. “Oh my god she’s losing a fight to a fucking easel.” Gigi said, slipping on a pair of white sandals before running downstairs and out the front door. She made her away across the street, still smiling at the sight.

“Want some help?” She asked, finally reaching the other girl.

“Jesus, fuck. You were not supposed to see this.” Crystal laughed. She ran a hand through her curls before looking up at Gigi, a fake pout painted across her face. She is way too adorable for her own good, holy shit.

“Well, too bad.” Gigi said. She bent over and started picking all the art supplies that, she guessed, had been knocked over during the struggle.

“I can’t get it to stand up. I don’t know what’s wrong, it was fine up in my room.” Crystal sighed, giving up and letting it drop to the floor. Gigi nodded.

“Okay, well how many times did you let it do that?” She joked.

“I-I may have dropped it three times while dragging it down the stairs, yeah.”

“I think I may know what your problem is.” She said.

“Wow, you know I am so glad Missouri has someone of your intelligence level living in it now. If it wasn’t for you I would still be fighting for my life against that thing.” Crystal pointed in disgust towards where the easel lay on the porch. Gigi just laughed in response. A silence fell over the girls. To Gigi’s surprise, for one of the only few times in her life, it wasn’t an awkward silence. Crystal wasn’t expecting a response from her, instead she turned her attention to focus on organizing her paints.

“Uh, okay, I, um, I was wondering if maybe you wanted to hang out today?” Gigi shifted in her spot, running a hand awkwardly through her hair. Crystal raised her eyebrows and smiled.

“Actually, I’m just not entirely sure I can handle a full day with you,” Crystal said. Gigi’s eyebrows furrowed, “I mean you just have such an overpowering personality.”

“Right, yeah, I’ve heard that about myself many times.” Gigi nodded in relief.  Just as she finished talking Crystal phone vibrated, she pulled it out of her back pocket to check the notification.

“Well Ms. Gigi Goode, you’re in luck. My friend Lux just asked me to go thrifting with her. Wanna come?” Crystal stood up and walked closer to Gigi. She bit her lip while waiting for the brunette’s response.

“Oh um, yeah sure. I’d love to.” Gigi said. In that moment she was positive she would’ve said yes no matter what Crystal invited her to.

Crystal ran inside to grab the keys to her car and say bye to her mom before dashing back to Gigi and grabbing her hand, “Okay let’s go.” She pulled Gigi toward her car, her skin burning where they’d made contact. Crystal’s car was very old and a horrendous mustard color but she loved it because it got her away from her parents. She was the only one in her friend group with a car, which meant all her friends loved it too. Gigi had to admit, Crystal was not a very good driver. She was always just a little bit too far over the speed limit for comfort and drove with her left leg up on the seat. They drove in silence, well Gigi was silent. Crystal couldn’t help but sing along to every song that came on as they made their way in town to the thrift store. Crystal’s taste in music was definitely different from Gigi’s, playing songs from King Princess, Cage the Elephant, and Hozier, whereas Gigi was more of a pop girl. She basically played Dua Lipa on repeat 24/7. Sitting so close to Crystal while Cherry Wine played throughout the car made Gigi feel overwhelmed, she tried to slow her breath as she stared down at where their hands both rested on the console. She resisted the urge to intertwine their fingers together, missing the feeling from earlier. She studied the other girl’s fingers, the way they dance ever so slightly to the music, the chipped purple nail polish she wore. She had rings on almost all of her fingers.

“You okay?” Crystal asked, glancing at Gigi out of the corner of her eye. She looked like she was going to be sick. But as soon as Crystal spoke Gigi snapped out of it, smiling and peeling her eyes away from their hands to look up at Crystal.

“Yeah, just uh- never mind.” Gigi stopped herself from saying something stupid. She felt foolish, she hadn’t even known this girl for 24 hours and she already had the urge to profess her love to her. She didn’t even know if Crystal was gay. Well, actually that’s not true, she listened to King Princess and Lana Del Rey. The girl was definitely some flavor of gay. Plus nobody that dressed like that was straight.

“What? No, tell me!” Crystal pouted.

“It’s nothing. Just your music makes me feel like I’m in a coming-of-age movie or something.” Gigi said. She tried to fight off the blush creeping across her cheeks. Crystal just laughed, making Gigi regret she said it.

“I like to listen to this kind of music when alone or like painting. It makes me feel calm and inspired. Or like I’m gonna be the next great sapphic artist,” Well, shit, there it was. The confirmation Gigi needed to insure her gaydar wasn’t completely broken. She swallowed hard, not wanting to show any reaction. “I just need to find my muse.” Now it was Crystal who was stealing glances at their hands, moving her hand just close enough that she could feel the heat radiating from Gigi’s. Missing that same heat when she reluctantly pulled her hand away so she could pull into a parking spot.

The girls made their way into the small shop that was filled with very loud clothes. The way Crystal dressed suddenly all made sense. There were only three other people in the shop, they were all standing together loudly talking about how horrendous the huge bubble gum pink dress in front of them was.

“Oh thank fuck, finally. Crystal you have to try this on!” One of them said, grabbing the dress off the rack and running up to Crystal. She stopped and gave Gigi a confused, but welcoming look. The girl looked so much like a fairy, Gigi had to suppress the urge to ask her how Tinker Bell was.

“Hi, I’m Daya.” Another girl, the tallest in the group, came up to them and put her hand out for Gigi to shake.

“Gigi,” She said, taking her hand. Gigi couldn’t help but notice how pretty they all were. What the hell is in the Missouri water?

“That’s Lux,” Crystal said pointing to the small blonde who was being swallowed by all the fabric of the dress she was holding, “and that’s Daegan.” Crystal pointed to the girl who was standing next to Daya.

“I really like your hair.” Gigi said, looking at Daegan’s bright pink hair. She wished she could pull off a color like that but alas she was destined to have boring brown hair for the rest of her life.

“Oh, my god thank you.” Daegan said, “I like her, Crystal can we keep her?” She made puppy dog eyes toward the girl who just laughed.

“Excuse me, hello?!” Lux huffed from under the dress, “Can we get back to Crys trying this on please.” She whined.

“Holy shit, yeah babe you have to try it on.” Daya said pushing past Gigi and taking the dress from Lux. Gigi felt her heart drop into her stomach. Babe? Crystal had a girlfriend? Not just that but a fucking hot girlfriend? Ugh the homophobia of it all. Gigi just walked over to the nearest rack and started looking through all the clothes, trying to ignore the giggles coming from Crystal as Daya pushed her into a dressing room.

A few minutes later Crystal emerged from the dressing room, pulling the thick velvet curtain back dramatically. She walked confidently out into the middle of the store and spun around for all her friends to see.

“You’ve never looked better.” Daegan said as she pulled her phone out to take a video of Crystal dancing around like an idiot. Crystal curtsied and let out a ‘thank you’ in a horrible British accent.

“I think we found your prom dress!” Lux added jumping up and down like a little kid. Crystal made a disgusted face.

“I’m not going to prom, and even if I was, I would never wear a dress.” She put a finger in her mouth and pretended to throw up.

“Ugh not this again. Crystal Elizabeth Methyd you’re going to prom, you have to,” Daya crossed her arms and stared sternly at Crystal for a few seconds before giving up and turning to Gigi, “Tell her she has to go to prom.”

Gigi looked between the girls confused. What kind of power did they think she had over Crystal? They’d just met, you couldn’t even classify them as friends yet. Shouldn’t Daya be the one to convince Crystal, she’s the one that’s her girlfriend here not Gigi. “I-I’ve never been to prom before but I’m sure it’s really fun. My mom says everyone should go to at least one of their proms.”

Crystal rolled her eyes, “Your mom sounds like mine.” Why couldn’t her friends just leave it alone? She already told them a million times she wasn’t going, although the thought of seeing Gigi in a prom dress did intrigue her. Crystal turned around and walked back into the dressing room.

The girls stayed in the shop for a couple of hours, trying on ugly hats and way too big sunglasses, before Lux declared that they had to leave because she was hungry. Crystal bought three button up shirts, that Daegan said looked something her dad would wear, and a bright turquoise and pink windbreaker that Gigi’s mom definitely would have owned in the 90’s.

They all climbed into Crystal’s car, Daegan complaining that making her sit in the back was transphobia. Crystal just ignored her and opened the passenger door for Gigi. She felt awkward in the front, shouldn’t Daya be sitting here so they could hold hands or something? Gigi ignored her thoughts, enjoying the way Crystal’s perfume smelled.

Being in the car with Crystal’s friends was very different than being with just Crystal. Daegan immediately stole the AUX to play Megan Thee Stallion, Doja Cat, and Nicki Minaj while Lux complained that she wanted to listen to Grimes. Crystal just ignored them trying to focus on driving with all the yelling going on around her.

They had finally calmed down, Lux accepting that there was no chance in hell Daegan was changing the music for her, until the question of where to eat came up. Daya voted for Taco Bell while Daegan complained that they had Taco Bell last time. Lux suggested Chick Fil A before being shut down by Crystal, reminding her that they no longer supported the restaurant because of their anti-lgbtq beliefs. Lux rolled her eyes while Daegan joked that the only reason she ate there was because their hatred for her existence made it fun.

“What about pizza?” Gigi offered. Before anyone could protest Crystal said yes, giving everyone in the back seat a stern look. They all murmured reluctant okay’s before changing the subject to gossip about someone from school.

They finally pulled into a small pizza place with picnic tables scattered out front and a burnt out sign that read ‘The Big Slice’. Daya and Lux grabbed a picnic table while Crystal and Daegan went in to order, Gigi opted to stay outside and wait for them to come back.

It was kind of awkward without Crystal there and Gigi found herself racking her brain for something to say. The other girls hadn’t said anything since they sat down either, instead staring at their phones.

“Uh, so uh Daya how long have y-you and Crystal been dating?” Gigi asked, nervously looking between her and Lux.

Daya choked back a laugh, “What? Crys and I aren’t dating. Ew that would be like dating my sister.”

“Oh I’m sorry, I-I just heard you call her babe and assumed.” She couldn’t help but feel relieved, hoping her face didn’t show it. Lux busted out laughing at the idea of Crystal and Daya together and couldn’t stop.

“I call everyone babe, don’t worry.” Daya assured her. Gigi swallowed, oh god could she tell that Gigi liked Crystal. She thought she had been discreet when she looked at her but apparently not.

“Oh I’m no-” She started to protest.

“What’s so funny?” Daegen asked as she and Crystal made their way to the table. She sat in between Daya and Lux while Crystal planted herself right next to Gigi.

“S-she,” Lux tried to get out, pointing at Gigi, “she thought you two were dating.” Daegen joined in and after a couple of seconds Daya found herself laughing too. Gigi tried to laugh but it just came out as an awkward chuckle. The only one who wasn’t laughing was Crystal. She wore a horrified expression, her eyes bouncing between Gigi and Daya. “Why, why, uh um why would you think that?” Crystal’s eyebrows furrowed as she turned attention completely to Gigi. But she just shrugged and said it didn’t matter.

The conversation was forgotten as soon as the waitress brought out the pizza and everyone was too busy stuffing their faces to talk about how bad of a couple Crystal and Daya would make.

As time passed it became easier for Gigi to be around Crystal’s friends, she actually enjoyed how loud they all were. With everyone else fighting to talk over each other no one really noticed Gigi’s lack of input. Thank god, she used to hate how her friends back home would always try to pull her into the conversation. Why couldn’t they understand if she had something to say she would goddamn say it.

“Oh shit. It’s almost 4. My parents are gonna be home soon and I promised I would be there to get ready for tonight.” Gigi said looking down at her phone. She started to stand up from the table.

“Oh okay, I’ll uh drive you home.” Crystal said, standing up too.

“You don’t have to, I can just walk or uh call a lyft or something.” Gigi said, secretly hoping Crystal would insist.

“Excuse me, what about us?” Lux whined.

“Also what’s tonight?” Daya asked.

“Huh? Oh Gigi and her parents are coming over for dinner.” Crystal mumbled, knowing there was bound to be teasing from her friends. They all raised their eyebrows but before any of them could say anything inappropriate Crystal pushed Gigi toward her car. Crystal yelled at them to find their own way home.

“I hate you, bitch!” Daegen shouted at Crystal. She just put up her middle finger and held it up as she climbed into the driver’s seat.

“Don’t let her make you listen to One Direction Gigi!” Daya added before Gigi closed her door, unable to hear them anymore. She couldn’t help but laugh.

The drive was quiet, but this time it wasn’t a comfortable silence. Both of them wanting to say something but too afraid to say it. Crystal put on the same music from before, calm love songs that made Gigi feel like she never wanted them to stop driving.

“Why did you think I was dating Daya?” Crystal asked abruptly, pulling Gigi out of her daydream.

Gigi’s eyebrows furrowed, “What?” God why was she bringing this up again? Gigi never wanted to think about that again.

“C’mon I wanna know,” Crystal pouted, “please!” She begged, turning to look at Gigi.

“It’s nothing, I uh, heard her call you babe and I just assumed,” She shrugged trying to look anywhere but at Crystal.

Crystal didn’t respond, instead they just fell back into uncomfortable silence. Gigi tried to come up with something to say. God the one person she actually wanted to talk to and she couldn’t come up a single fucking thing to say.

“This doesn’t sound like One Direction.” Gigi said.

“Yeah I uh, I only bring that out with people I like,” Crystal shot her a devilish smile, “sorry.”

“You’re such an ass, oh my god.” Gigi laughed, hitting Crystal lightly on her shoulder. She watched as Crystal picked up her phone and unlocked it, quickly changing the song to ‘What Makes You Beautiful’ making Gigi laugh even more. “That’s more like it.”

Crystal finally pulled into her driveway, reluctantly putting the car in park. Gigi lingered in the passenger’s seat, not wanting to miss the heat from Crystal’s body. She slowly unbuckled her seat belt, grabbing the handle to the car door.

“So uh, I’ll see you tonight, yeah?” Crystal asked, unbuckling her own seat belt.

“Yeah, yeah. I’m looking forward to it.” Gigi pulled herself out of the car.

She was halfway down Crystal’s driveway when she heard her name. Gigi spun around to face her, “Yeah?”

“I had fun, uh with you,” She stopped as if she was searching for a difficult word, “today. I had fun with you today.” She ran a hand awkwardly through her hair.

Gigi chuckled, “I had fun with you too, Crystal.”

“Okay, good.” Crystal spun around and stumbled cheerfully up the stairs of her porch, turning around to wave at Gigi one last time before disappearing into her house.

Gigi continued walking back to her own house, smiling the entire way.

[ghosttotheparty]

cotton candy skies always look better in person

2. also available on AO3 chapter one

Lucas does his friends, he does.

But if anything, he feels more real in Antwerp. More like him and less like a statue of him. Not that he doesn’t feel safe or loved with his friends, of course he does, but walking around Antwerp with just a camera and camera bag in hand, he feels more like he can do anything. He’s not afraid of bumping into people he knows, not afraid of people recognizing him.

He’s started wearing rings, necklaces. He’s grown his hair out, into actual curls that fall down the back of his neck instead of halfway across his forehead like some sort of pathetic fringe. He’s painted his fucking nails, for God’s sake, even if most of them are just clear polish, blue and orange covering his left pinky and index fingernails, he feels bold. Unstoppable.

Maybe Noah has something to do with it. Noah, who somehow Lucas has been talking to more than Kes, Isa, and Jayden. Noah, who Lucas ran into in an art supply store two weeks before he left. Noah, who Lucas trusts enough to become one of three people in Utrecht that knows about him. Lucas had told him the third time they’d hung out, told him about his former hopeless crush on Kes, and sworn him to secrecy. (Noah had pretended to lock his lips, drop the key in his mug, and drink it.) After enough conversations, Noah had been able to change his mindset completely. “You can paint your nails and be masculine. You can paint your nails and be feminine. You can do whatever the fuck you want, and you can be whatever the fuck you want. Just don’t be a poser.” Lucas had laughed.

Ralph also knows. Lucas told his over a cup of coffee too, and even though he knows Ralph would be supportive if he told him he was moving to fucking Antarctica, he was still scared. Ralph had squealed and clapped when he said it, and Lucas had smiled, but when Lucas began to cry, Ralph scooted his chair over to him and held him while he told Ralph he was scared. Scared of what he saw in the news, scared of what he saw in the streets. Scared to look gay, scared to be gay. Ralph had held his head close to his chest, combing his fingers through his curls like his mother did when he was little. Ralph whispered to him quietly. “It’s scary. It is. But it’s not your fault. You’re not the problem. They are. You just have to live, okay?” Lucas has taken “to live” to heart. He’s done just surviving. Ralph gave him a little rainbow enamel pin and a kiss on the forehead before he left. (The pin now lives on the strap of his camera bag.)

And his mother knows. Lucas had had a full-blown panic attack in his room before telling her, but she claimed she already knew. (Which, of course, wasn’t the reaction he’d expected, nor was it the reaction he’d wanted, but he’ll take what he can get.) While he cried, she’d reassured him that God loves him. And he’d cried harder. “God loves you and whoever you love,” she’d said, “and I do, too.” There were tears in her eyes, too.

He’d never doubted that she loves him. She made it clear she did. She got him his camera, she’d bought all the art supplies he needed. She’d bring home “surprises” when he was little, usually stacks of printer paper from her office, or a new marker set. He’d just worried that maybe God wouldn’t love him. That his mom would gently tell him to repent, would send him to a camp because she wanted the best for him. The possibilities were endless. The day after he came out to her, Lucas had gone to Ralph’s to tell him, and they’d celebrated. Lucas felt loved.

After coming out to her, their relationship went back to the way it was when he was a kid before he realised he’s gay. They’d started having movie night every weekend, started cooking together. Lucas told her he used to like Kes, and she’d giggled like a schoolgirl. There were no secrets between them. And everything was fine.

Until all that shit happened.

The shit that landed her in an institute and him forced to make the choice between staying with his father in Utrecht or moving to a completely different city in a completely different country, with a cousin he hadn’t seen since he was eight. He’d chosen the cousin in a heart-beat, obviously.

When he’d gone to say goodbye to her, she was laying in bed, covered in crisp, white sheets, looking up at him through dripping eyes, scared like a child. “You’ll call me, won’t you?” “Of course, mama.” “Promise?” He’d taken her hands between his and held them to her heart. “Promise.”

He’d walked out of the building with her wedding ring around his ring finger. The ring she’d told him, she only kept because his name was engraved in it. “What about you?” he’d asked, He had her ring now, but that did that leave her with? She’d patted her belly, and although he didn’t know if she was referring to her stretch marks or the c-section scar, he’d laughed tearfully with her.

The ring he often forgets about, unable to feel it on his finger after he got used to it. But he still twists it when he gets nervous or anxious.

Like now.

He’s leaning against the wall of the convenience store, headphones on, music blasting, twisting the ring quickly. (He’d texted his mom the night she’d given it to him that it fit him perfectly. Loose enough to twist easily, but not so loose he had to worry about it falling off.) The sky is soft, everything he could see washed in a golden-pink light. For a moment, he regrets not bringing his camera with him.

He stands up straight when the doors to the studio building open. This is the seventh time he’s stood here at this hour, hoping the pretty boy in tights would make his way to the door. Not that Lucas would tell anyone.

His hope starts to fade now, as the stream of dancers slows down, longer gaps of time between the door shutting behind someone and opening for someone else. He analyzes everyone’s face. None of them is him.

What if he doesn’t come weekly? What if he only comes once a month or something? What if last week was a one-time thing and Lucas never sees him again? The questions swirl around in Lucas’s mind as he cranes his neck slightly, still searching.

Then, by some miraculous sort of divine intervention, the swings open almost a full minute after being close, and he walks out.

Fuck.

He’s fucking gorgeous.

Lucas takes his headphones off, sliding them around his neck, a smile creeping across his face. The boy is talking to a girl who Lucas recognises from last week. She’s missing the dark, almost theatrical makeup, but her dark red hair is hard to miss. They’re both laughing, the boy shoving the girl to the side, and she kicks him, throwing her leg up high so it hits his shoulder. He pretends to grab at it, and she drops her leg, scrambling backwards and omitting a “No!” loud enough that bystanders turn to look. He hushes her, his eyes wide with amusement, and Lucas smiles.

He doesn’t feel like approaching him yet, not with his friend right there, even though he’s been longing to just see him since last week, So he waits, watching, trying not to look creepy by pulling out his phone and holding it in front of himself. He pauses his music, realising he left it playing.

They go back to fighting, the girl throwing punches, missing, and the boy managing to hook his arm around her neck in a faux chokehold.

Other dancers around them watch before rolling their eyes and looking away, and Lucas laughs to himself. After a few seconds, the girl breaks away, shoving the boy away and kicking his back for good measure. They exchange a few words, soaked in laughter, that Lucas can’t hear, and after a minute, Lucas becomes anxious again, wondering if they might leave together. Maybe they’re dating, he thinks, his heart dropping. He keeps watching them, his fingertips tapping his knuckles, torn between waiting a bit longer to see if she leaves, like last time, and missing his chance if they leave together.

Lucas looks away, down the road, sighing, before looking back. The girl is looking at her phone, holding the boy away from her with her other hand. After a second she says something to him, sticking her phone in the pocket of her jacket, and shakes his hand. She punches him one more time before making her way down the street, and he flips her off as she waves.

Lucas watches as the boy looks down, pulling his phone out of his pocket and adjusting the strap of his bag. He looks like he could be waiting for someone.

Now or never.

Lucas takes a deep breath before making his way down the sidewalk. He passes in front of an alleyway, glancing down it to make sure no cars or bikes are coming. He’s still twisting his ring as the boy gets closer, and he shoves his hands in the pocket of his hoodie.

Up close, Lucas could see that there’s a mole right next to his eye, a detail that doesn’t show up in the photo he’d taken last week,

Fuck. The photo. What if he thinks it was super weird? What if he was creeped out by it? But the way he smiled… Lucas has never taken a photo of a smile like that. It looks real. Genuine. Honest. Maybe he doesn’t think it was that weird.

The thought of it pushes Lucas forward until he’s standing right next to him.

“Hi.” His voice is small. The boy startles and lifts his head, looking at Lucas. His eyes are a rich brown, his lashes dark. And Lucas’s stomach feels like it goes through a whole gymnastics routine as the boy smiles slowly, recognition sparking in his expression.

“Hey.” His voice matches his eyes.

They stare at each other for a second, much like they did last week.

“I was hoping you’d be here today,” Lucas says, rocking back on his feet as he takes in the boy’s face.

“Every Thursday,” he responds, still smiling.

“Yeah?”

“Mm-hmm.”

“Good to know.” Lucas hopes he sounds bolder than he feels. The boy tucks his phone into his pocket, facing Lucas completely. His hoodie is a light cream colour, his jacket a dark brown, almost matching his hair. (Which looks ridiculously soft. Lucas doesn’t think about combing his fingers through the mess.)

“What’s up?” the boy asks.

Lucas takes a breath before answering. This is really happening.

“Nothing. Just wondered if you wanted to hang out.

The boy’s smile takes over his face again and Lucas stares at it.

“Yeah, for sure.”

“Unless someone is coming to get you,” Lucas adds uncertainly, almost interrupting him.

“My mom just told me I’m on my own tonight, so… I’m all yours.” Lucas notices the boy’s cheeks become pink and he has to suppress another smile. “What were you thinking about doing?”

“Uhm…” Lucas pauses before reaching into his back pocket and pulling out a joint. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.” The boy tilts his head to the side quickly, beckoning him. Lucas follows as he leads him to the alleyway. Most of the dancers are gone by now, the street quiet. “I’m Jens, by the way.”

Jens.

It feels like the sky opens up around him.

“Lucas.”

“Where are you from?” The boy, Jens, turns into the alley, dropping his bag to the ground and jumps up onto the dumpster. Lucas watches as he brushes his hands in front of himself before sticking the joint in his mouth and copying him. After brushing his hands off, he takes it out of his mouth and answers, realising Jens has been watching him.

“Utrecht.”

“Ah.” Jens watches as Lucas pulls a lighter out of his pocket and lights the joint, blocking it from the breeze. “That explains the accent.”

Right. Lucas forgets how he sounds different to everyone around him. To him, Jens is the one with a cute accent.

Lucas takes a drag, nodding, and holds it out to Jens as he exhales. Jens (and everything else, but Lucas is only looking at Jens) is covered in pink, like God put a pair of rose-coloured glasses on the sun.

“How long have you been in Antwerp?” Jens asks, turning to look at him, pulling a leg up in front of himself.

“Just a few weeks. I moved in with my cousin.”

“Mm. Trouble at home?” Jens leans forward and passes the joint to him. Their fingers brush together and it’s like he just touched a live wire. He sighs, tilting his head back and forth.

“You could say that.” He lifts the joint to his mouth, feeling Jens watching. “How long have you lived in Antwerp?” he asks, changing the subject.

“All my life.”

“Same house, same everything?”

“Yup.”

“Sounds boring.”

Jens snorts, looking at him. Lucas is on fire.

“It was.”

By the time the joint burns down, the sky is a glowing kind of dark blue. Lucas finds out that Jens has been dancing since he was a kid, that his little sister is going to start next year. He learns that Jens is good at math but despises history. “The only things I can memorise are combinations and routines.” Lucas tells him he’ll do his history homework if Jens does his math. It’s a deal. They shake on it. (And Lucas feels like he’ll be shaking for the rest of time.)

Lucas tells him he’s been into art and photography for years but only really started about a year or so ago. Jens asks if he still has the picture he took of him last week.

“Of course, how could I get rid of my only picture of my model?” he says, realising that they’re flirting.

“We can take a better picture next week.”

Next week. Lucas feels like his soul is smiling.

“Thursday evening photoshoot?”

“Perfect.”

Jens giggles and Lucas thinks it might be his favourite sound in the world.

That night, his cousin asks how his day went. Lucas tells him he wandered the city, taking pictures on his phone, which is true. He thinks about telling him about Jens, but doesn’t.

He wants to keep this for himself for now.

[munsonsduchess]

So. I re watched The Magnificent Seven again because I’m at home self isolating until my housemates covid test comes back in a couple days so I made some notes. Presented below as I watched the film … again

Teddy looks like he wants to say something to encourage Matthew not to speak but like he just can’t find the courage to speak up

Everyone turning to stare at Sam as he rides through the town. Like they aren’t used to seeing a man of colour make something of himself.

The bartender who tells Sam they don’t serve ���that kind’ as a direct insulation that they don’t serve Sam’s kind. Which could have just been because Sam is a lawman and the barman is an outlaw but could also be more than that

Faraday isn’t as stupid as he looks. He knows exactly who Dan is and what Sam’s purpose was. He could tell something was happening and was ready in seconds with a gun drawn to help Sam.

He sticks around after everyone runs out because he knows Sam’s occupation and seems to want to know more.

Emma has obviously been searching for someone who could help for a long time. Teddy stopping her from talking to Sam and her acceptance seems to imply that they’ve spoken to people before but that no one has taken them seriously. Maybe because Emma is a woman

Emma is clearly ready to offer up anything she can to find ‘righteousness’. It also seems like she’s more than ready for a fight.

Sam had decided upon hearing Bouge’s name that he would take the job and then when Emma shared her convictions he knew he could pass off his intentions as unselfish if anyone asked

Faraday cheats at cards and is scared of the dark confirmed. He’s also clever enough to use his wits to get out of a situation when he’s seemingly at the mercy of two other men

Faraday has issues around killing people. He clearly shows remorse for his actions. He doesn’t seem to like violence but he’ll use it to get what he wants if he needs to

Does Faraday know who Joan of Arc is?

He’s also apparently willing to throw his life away for strangers

Emma is not here for your shit

Teddy is a good boy and he’s here to help his friend on her vengeance quest as all good friends should

Vasquez wants Sam to know that he’s not the type of man who kills in cold blood. He uses Emma as leverage because a white woman’s death will look worse for Sam

Sam offers to tear up the warrant to get Vas on his side but I have the feeling he would have done it anyway

Vas taking a minute to decide and figuring if he works with Sam there’s a possibility of him going free and not having to run anymore

GOODY! That hip swagger

“That’s ok son you just pay me double” Goody is a respected member of the community and his reputation proceeds him so there is a level of fear there at offending him or anyone associated with him

Faraday is clearly interested to see how people react to or behave around Goody. To see how the man stacks up to the story

Goody very interested in who Faraday and Teddy are and what they have to say. Putting them off their game by speaking in the middle of the saloon while he’s getting a shave

“I keep him employed and he keeps me on the level” clearly Billy has been helping Goody with his demons far beyond what we see later

Goody and Sam being friends warms my heart

That good old southern breeding. Goody can’t resist being charming

“Ain’t no such thing as a Texican” that’s one hell of a loaded statement right there

“This is not going to end well” couldn’t have said it better myself Goody

The Famous Pigeon Brothers who weren’t famous for very long

“I believe that bear was wearing peoples clothes” Joshua the man was snuck up on in the dead of night, had a boulder smashed over his head and has been tracking the culprits for two days. I don’t think you’d be in your right mind either

“Don’t call the alligator big mouth till you cross the river” Goody just has all the best advice

IT’S MY BOY!

There’s obviously something Faraday is trying to drown in all that whiskey and Teddy knows it which is obviously why he tells Faraday to keep it

Emma doesn’t trust Farday at all

Goody knows what’s up although he’s not one to talk about the battle behind him

MY SON! HE’S SO PRETTY I WANT TO CRY

Sam giving Vas the gun so he’s less threatening to Red. Same way he left his gun outside when they went after Vas

I love that Martin cut his hair off to be historically accurate but damn what I wouldn’t have given for a long haired Red in this movie

Peace offering or trolling? Both? Both.

“Yeah ok I trust you now”

Can I also say I love how Martin learnt to ride bareback for the historical accuracy? Like historical accuracy is my jam. Now I just wonder how accurate the costumes are

“Oh good it’s a black man and an Asian man quickly call your children inside for who knows what havoc they might bring”

I do love how the racism is never as overt as someone using a slur but it’s always there just under the surface

“Manservant? Really?”

Did they practice how they were going to come into town and look imposing or do they all just instinctively know how to pose? I know Goody does anyway

I cannot keep a straight face when Farday calls himself the worlds greatest lover

Sam has no time for these Blackstone men and I am here for it

Sam’s horse is just called Horse

Goody having PTSD flashbacks before the shooting even starts since he’s clearly triggered by just the situation

A western staple where the bad guys always miss and the good guys never do

At times like this Mal Reynolds comes to me speaking words of wisdom “shoot the man not the horse, a dead horse is cover, a live horse is a whole lot of panic”

Faraday and Vas being very gay and poor confused Red like “tie him up what?”

“Lincoln like the president” and goody just “oh damn”

Someone please give Emma a better shirt. She’s gonna spill out of that one

“Seems I was the only one with balls enough to do so” damn right you were

Emma just breaking down when there’s no one around to see her use she has to be strong

“Fame is a sarcophagus” “what’s a syllable?”

TABLE MANNERS FOR THE LOVE OF GOD TABLE MANNERS

Goodbye to the working girls the town isn’t the same without them

Emma has a better shirt! She still looks like she’s gonna spill out though

Shooting lessons with Goody and Faraday

“The way of northern aggression”

Billy’s class just running away because he’s way too good

“Make me some eggs”

“GET SOME GRAVEL IN YOUR CRAW!”

Faraday trying to goad Goody into proving himself. Sam’s wariness and Goody turning around and showing Faraday just why he got the title he did despite the reasons why he doesn’t pick up a rifle anymore

Do any of them know what Jack is talking about?

“So far so good”

We’re to assume it’s Goody picking off Bouge’s men at the mine since he’s the only one who could make those sorts of shots which means Sam has talked him into doing it even though he’s seen what happened to Goody during the initial fight

“I’ve always wanted to blow something up”

The look on the faces of the people who live in town as the miners come through. They’ve always lived separately from these men and now they’re forced to look at their faces and see just how they’ve all been living

Sam putting the dynamite in the hotel like it’s no big deal

Poor Peter Skarsgard. He’s the bad guy or the poor Dad in a horror movie while his dad is spooning Colin Firth on a boat in Greece

“I worked for my money. I wasn’t given a million dollar loan. I’m a good guy”

Emma can shoot just fine. She does not need you Faraday

“I had a father thank you” “I didn’t” proceeds to show off as if to prove himself

“They say the nightmares never go away” no they really don’t ask Goody

“Avenge me!” Yeah faraday it’s not that hard

“I am to fight” “it comes to that and we’re all dead” excuse you Sam but Emma is the one who brought you here and she’s the one who’s been raring for the fight since the beginning but sure put her with the women and children

I’m also so mad they cut out of the scene of Vas and the school teachers kid talking

“I have three Maria’s!”

I’m afraid of owls too goody you aren’t alone

TABLE MANNERS FOR THE LOVE OF GOD

How long had Bouge been in Rose Creek and making the residents live in fear? That it had to be the seven who were able to show them how to live their life again

Those loose white shirts though 👌🏼

Squinting into the sun as the realisation dawns

Sam knows Goody better than Goody knows himself and Goody knows Sam better than Sam knows himself

Sam doing his best to help his friend with his PTSD but Goody just can’t

“It looks like he’s started to drink” that’s because Goody was his friend his best friend and there are untold emotions and god knows what else between them and now that man had left but not just that but left him behind is torturous

“I’m hungry” You little shit!” Red Harvest. Professional Troll

Sam seeking refuge in what’s left of the church. Feeling the proverbial noose tightening as he clutches at his neck

Emma reminding us what this whole endeavour is for. How it all started. How it’s going to end

Bouge sitting back because he’s sure his hired men will be enough. He’s never faced opposition before so he’s confident he still won’t. Or at least that his money will solve all his problems

Also if Red only wears his war paint for special occasions and if he was tracking the group prior to joining them does that mean he put his war paint on specifically to talk to Sam

Another man in Goody’s spot in the bell tower because presumably he’s the second best shot with a rifle or the only other person they could trust up there

A+ use of Fox holes though

Jack reciting his prayers as he goes absolutely feral

Faraday’s happy little smile when he finally gets to blow something up

Jack trying to help as many men as he can, men who are fathers, husbands, good honest men

Bouge who doesn’t seem to care one ounce that the people in the village are being slaughtered and bringing the battling gun out just for extra overkill

“You ok güero?” “So far so good”

“We still have men there sir” proof that Bouge does not care one single ounce for human life that isn’t his own

That rebel yell

“The devils breath” I can only imagine how a Gatling gun got that name especially from a war vet who’s likely seen countless friends allies and enemies alike be blown down by this devil

Faraday being concerned for the children even though he’s injured himself

Jack protecting Teddy at the cost of his own life. Defiant of Denali to the end But accepting his death with a sigh believing in his faith that he’ll be rewarded in heaven and reunited with his family

“I knew you’d be back” Billy has so much faith in Goodnight and I’m gonna cry

Emma with an empty gun putting herself in front of an injured man between the injured man and Denali

Denali ain’t shit!

“You’re a disgrace”

“My daddy used to say a lot of things” these two I cannot cope

“I might need a new vest” Faraday you reckless idiot

“Hit the steeple”

“I got him!” “Oh Goody” I’m not crying you’re crying

I know there’s a lot of talk about Chris Pratt being the worst Chris but he was so good in this movie I swear. Which yeah I know doesn’t change anything but when you see him playing Faraday in that last scene where it’s all down to him. I can’t

“I’ve always been lucky with one eyed jacks”

Nope definitely not crying. Not me

Bouge’s complete disregard for human life as he surveys the town

Bouge V Sam

“If god didn’t want them sheered he wouldn’t have made them sheep” says a man who feels no remorse at all for the blood on his hands

This time it’s Bouge who’s going to feel the noose tighten and I am here for the cinematic drama of it all

God won’t save you now Bouge. Run into the church you like. It’s not going to help

“Ask for forgiveness” The reveal of the rope mark. What Sam has been doing in Rose Creek this whole time. Why he took the job at the mention of Bouge’s name

[marvinswriting]

tiny swap part three: gretchen and janis part one , part two

Monday, 7:10 am

Janis crossed her arms, blowing a raspberry to Damian.

Her friend, obviously, did not seem to take this as a serious insult as he chuckled, turning is attention elsewhere. "Okay, Jan."

They all shared a first period, one that Janis normally slept through with Damian. 

But she was not with Damian and there would definitely be no sleeping since Gretchen sat in the very front row.

Fucking hell.

Damian said goodbye to the group as he made his way to the back and Janis frowned, wanting nothing more than to go with him.

Nothing against Gretchen.

Just-

She trusted Damian more.

A lot more.

Gretchen sat down and Janis allowed herself to be placed on the table, mindful of Damian's warnings earlier. 

Just one week. 

Tuesday, 7 am

Walking into school on Gretchen's shoulder felt new. Even in middle school, she would be with Karen.

Gretchen's right shoulder was reserved for Regina George and Regina George only.

Yet here she sat.

Janis threw Regina and peace sign for good measures and laughed as the girl returned a middle finger.

No real feelings hurt, Janis knew that.

Even Shane Omen didn't seem to know what to think of it as they passed him in the hall.

That was real power.

Janis didn't care for ruling the school.

But if sitting on Gretchen's shoulder as she and Karen walked the halls was all it took to stop getting harassed, she would have done this long ago.

Gretchen actually wasn't bad at the whole walking with a tiny on her shoulder. She had definitely improved since middle school at least. 

The giant stopped at her locker, slipping books in while talking with Karen- something about boys.

Gross.

Janis gave no useful commentary to the conversation. The plastics didn't expect her too.

Maybe this week wouldn't be the most god awful thing.

Wednesday, 8:56 am

Janis frowned at her phone.

Regina was asking if she and Aaron wanted to stay after school just to talk. Call it English help.

Well, the nickname didn't make sense anymore since their giants knew what it entailed but, sure, Janis will humor her.

"Hey, Gretchen?"

The giant looked up from her school work.

"I got after school help today. Can you give me a ride?"

Gretchen sighed knowingly. "I haven't dropped you yet, dude. What could you have to whine about."

"Hey!"

Gretchen laughed, nudging Janis with her pencil. "Yeah, I can drive you."

Wednesday, 4 pm

"Thanks for giving me a ride, Gretchen," Janis said as the plastic stepped into her car. 

"Of course, I wasn't just gonna let you stay at school overnight."

Janis smiled. It was only Wednesday but, she had grown to trust Gretchen a lot more this week. Gretchen hadn't dropped her- yet- and she was open and easy to talk too. It was something Janis never really noticed when she was always with Damian.

Huh.

Gretchen turned on the car, a pop song playing softly. She scooped up Janis, pacing her in over in the cup holder and buckled up.

"If something happened to you because you were on my shoulder Damian would never forgive me." She explained when Janis gave her a questioning look.

"I won't fall! I can take care of myself."

"Uh-huh." Gretchen pulled out of the school parking lot. "So, what did you talk about?"

"Oh you know- bitchin'." Janis grinned.

Gretchen knew full well that Janis couldn't tell her. 

The specifics at least.

Hey, bitchin' wasn't a total lie.

But that was par for every meeting.

Maybe this week wasn't so different after all.

Thursday, 11:30 pm

"So," Gretchen's voice was a bit robotic as it came through the phone.

Janis sat at her easel, painting. "So."

"How was this week?" Gretchen asked. "I'm no Damian but I'd like to think I wasn't awful."

Janis smiled. "No, you weren't awful. At all. This week was great, actually. Regina is lucky to have you"

"-You think?"

"Yeah! Why wouldn't she?"

There was quiet on the other end. "I dunno. It's stupid but like-" Gretchen sighed.

Janis lowered her paintbrush, turning her full attention to her phone. "Gretchen, you talking to Janis Sarkisian about feelings. I guarantee it's not gonna be stupid. "

Gretchen laughed. "I know Regina hates all things that require feeling and having a heart. But I know she loves me and trusts me anyway I just- wish she'd show it more. I dunno. Is that selfish?"

"I don't think so?"

Gretchen continued. "Just, Cady and Aaron are so open with each other. You and Damian- well sometimes I'm convinced you share the same mind. Regina just won't let me in. Like- I can see something is bothering her, but she won't tell me what. I just wanna help."

Janis sighed sadly. "What you're saying now- it sounds a lot like a talk I had with Damian about a year into our friendship. After that, I worked to be more open. I tried to let him in more. And look at us now. You just gotta talk with Regina. I promise you it's not stupid."

"Thanks, Janis," Gretchen said. Janis could almost hear the smile. "Now I got to get to bed but- please don't stay up late painting."

"Oh, I will. I get Damian's pocket again tomorrow, I plan to pass out at lunch and sleep for a month."

Gretchen laughed. "Alright. Good night then."

"Bye, Gretchen."

Friday, 12 pm

Gretchen pushed her way past crowds in the cafeteria, steadily making her way to the gang's table.

Janis leaned closer to her neck as they passed. No matter who she was with, crowded hallways and cafes would forever be a no no. 

Gretchen sat at the table first, nobody else was here. 

"You excited to see Regina?" Janis asked as Gretchen lowered her to the table.

"Yeah. You ready to see Damian?"

"I'm ready for a nap."

Gretchen laughed. "I told you you should have gone to bed."

"Oooo! Look what we've got here!" A taunting voice cooed from behind Gretchen. 

Janis can't see over Gretchen's head, but its a voice she knows all too well.

"What can we do for you, Shane?" Gretchen sits up straighter. 

"I was just wondering how long you think little Space Dyke is gonna last?"

"I'm sorry?" Janis frowned as Gretchen stood up next to Shane.

"She's obviously replaced Regina. You really think she's gonna last long, Gretchen?"

Extreme distance filled Gretchen's features. "Janis didn't replace Regina."

"Then why have you been carrying around Space Dyke?"

"I'm allowed to carry around other friends." Gretchen crosses her arms, standing up straight. 

Gretchen was short. There was no denying that.

But when she drew herself to full hight? She was intimidating. You just never saw it because she let Regina do the talking.

Janis blinked in disbelief at the argument going on in front of her.

Gretchen looked-

unnerving. 

Shane didn't seem to feel the same uneasiness as he glared down at Gretchen. "What's it matter to you? This is is between Space Dyke and I."

"It's not space dyke. It's Janis. And Janis is my friend."

Shane rolled his eyes. "Why don't you leave caring for the worthless tiny to that gay kid?"

Woah woah woah. Janis frowned, standing up, but Gretchen beat her to the punch.

"Damian? Yeah, he's got a name too. I'll give you the benefit of the doubt, maybe you didn't know! I mean, I know because I know everything about everybody. I know things about you that can get you expelled. I know things about all your friends that could diminish Northshore's giant football team. I know shit. Maybe you don't! So I'll let you know right now. It's Damian and Janis. And you better leave them the fuck alone."

Shane rolls his eyes. "You wouldn't do shit without Regina George's permission."

Janis was vaguely aware of a crowd starting to form around the table. She didn't like it one bit.

They had done so well this week! No one was dropped nothing went wrong. Of course, the period they are supposed to switch back everything goes to shit.

Janis tried to ignore the crows around them and the way she felt suffocated.

"I don't need Regina's permission to destroy your reputation," Gretchen said, her voice was dangerously low, almost a growl. 

Shane swallowed, and momentarily, his bad boy look faltered, revealing a truly threatened Shane Omen. Only momentarily.

"Stay in your own fights." He said, glaring down at Gretchen. 

A low 'ooo' admitted from some of Shane's friends in the crowd.

Janis stiffened.

Shane smirked, seeming filled with a newfound confidence now that he was backed up by the crowd. He turned to Janis, the familiar malice in his eyes turning her blood cold.

This was just supposed to be a fun week, a nice experiment if you will. 

This wasn't supposed to happen.

Shane reached forward and Janis instinctively stepped backward.

She couldn't back up fast enough, Shane was quicker.

Shit shit shit.

A hand slammed in front of Janis, blocking Shane and shaking the table. 

"Fuck off." Gretchen all but snarled. 

Janis stared wide-eyed at the hand in front of her.

Holy shit.

She felt nauseous from the spike of adrenaline and her body was shaking involuntarily. 

Shane chuckled. "Seriously, Gretchen. Learn your plac-"

Gretchen reached forward, slapping Shane across the face. 

There was a gasp as the crowd fell silent.

All Shane's friends who were there to back him up stepped backward into the crowd.

Janis hugged herself slightly, pulling her knees to her chest. There was still a crowd around her and it felt like too much.

Too many people.

Too much noise.

Her breaths felt shallow.

"Did you just- slap me?"

Gretchen nodded, stepping forward as Shane stepped backward. "You leave my friends alone."

"Psycho bitch." Shane spat, turning and disappearing into the crowd.

Gretchen didn't turn around immodestly, she just watched Shane walk away.

Janis wrapped her jacket tighter around her, like that could protect her or anything. The crowd had dispersed but it left the cafeteria buzzing again and everything felt too loud. 

She was vaguely aware of two more tinies on the table, people sitting all around, but her brain couldn't comprehend. 

All Janis could do was tug her jacket tighter and tighter until it wouldn't go anymore. She stared numbly at her hands, knuckles white from pulling her jacket.

Fingers wrapped around her torso and Janis gasped, her arms shotting out to push at the fingers.

No no no.

"Jan- Janis. It's me."

 Damian. Janis relaxed, the last of her adrenaline fueled fight leaving her body. She allowed herself to be gently scooped up as Damian raised her to eye level.

"You okay?"

"I- yeah. I think?"

"You think?" Damian frowned.

"No like- Shane didn't touch me. I'm physically fine. Just shaken up, I guess."

"We were so close to a problem-free week." Regina comments from the table. She walks back over to Gretchen who picks her immediately. 

"Yeah." Janis sunk into Damian's hands. "So close."

Damian drew his hands to his chest, wordlessly holding Janis close.

Janis squeezed her eyes shut as she leaned into Damian's shirt, trying to will herself to calm down.

"I hate Shane Omen." Gretchen mumbled.

Janis laughed dryly, turning to look at her friends across the table.

Regina and Aaron had obviously already found way to their giant's shoulders and Gretchen was holding her hand against her cool water bottle.

"You okay?" Janis asked.

Gretchen grinned. "I hit him a bit harder then I meant to."

"Fucking good!" Regina said. 

Janis grinned. "He deserved it."

"Agreed." Damian said, his voice rumbling through Janis. 

She grinned, leaning into Damian's warmth. 

The week itself wasn't bad. Yeah, it was a rough ending but it was in no way Gretchen's fault.

If anything, it would have been worse without her. 

Janis grabbed onto the edge of Damian's jacket, pulling herself out of his hands and using folds in the fabric for leverage as she hoisted herself into the familiar pocket.

"Jesus, Janis. Are we back at this again?" 

Janis popped her head out of the jacket. "I held back all week just for you. But I'm not with Gretchen anymore."

Damian looked down at her but a small smile played on his lips, betraying his disappointment. "Just be careful."

"Always am!" Janis gave a salute to the table before sinking into the pocket, getting comfy.

At the end of the week, while all the giants were her friends, Damian was her giant. And she never wanted to do this little experiment again.

fuck shane omen, man @realmisspolarbear @musicallygt @smallsoysauce @sourishlemons

[countryshitposts]

you got two black eyes from loving too hard

China is in love with his friend, but the clutches of homophobia are strong.

Warnings; homophobia and some smut scenes (cliffhanger too)

Zhongguo Renmin would lie if he says Éguó did not give him the same feelings as his father had once did.

(No matter how many times he scolds and berate himself for this, he can't stop these sinful thoughts spinning around his mind and manipulating his heart to do countless of atrocious acts that will leave him reeling for the next eternity.)

Unlike Sulian, however, Éguó's feelings towards Renmin was soft and genuine friendship, preserved for the best and most important people in his life. There is nothing sinful behind his honey-laced voice, soft touches puncturing and opening Renmin's skin alive, and that blinding and beautiful smile that rivals- no, not the sun, but Sulian himself.

Oh heavens above, no matter how many countless times he has told himself that homosexuals are disgusting and horrible, he falls with a man.

A man who does not reciprocate the same feelings towards him, a final blow to his stone cold heart and solidifying completely.

He had to fall in love with two men in the same family branch.

When Renmin realizes he is developing alien feelings towards Éguó (he tries to remember when he had fallen in love with he) the man had tried - yet failed - to accomplish completely abolishing his feelings for him. He cannot make another mistake again, he cannot have his heart broken to tiny pieces once again.

(Whether the mistake be he and Sulian's failure of a relationship or being gay, it is truly a mystery to him.)

Renmin tries to act casual after his outbreak of feelings started, a manifestation of butterflies trying to rip his stomach open and to fly out of there after tearing him piece by piece until he's nothing but a something, a someone that had once been alive and so in love. But Éguó was absolutely not helping; his twinkling gray eyes and delighted smile painting across his features whenever Renmin enters a room as close as he, the ultimately drunk nights they keep having to satisfy themselves, his cold voice melting whenever Renmin is around makes him all the more warmer and the feelings worse to handle and tolerate than before.

(He remembered trembling in front of a mirror, staring at his reflection like it is the most sinful thing in earth and rips out many a strand of his dark hair to emphasize just how dim-witted he is.)

He tries hard to hide these feelings that will ruin his and Éguó's friendship, which horrifyingly challenging and difficult to manage whenever Éguó would rant about the homos running around his land (Renmin would flinch at the slightest mention he hates gays before laughing pleasantly and saying they're all repulsive); stranger - or friendly - women who'd talk or flirt with his friend to the point that something inside of Renmin wanted to make them disappear like those damned protesters (he insists that he just felt left out whenever Éguó talks to someone else- he had simply laughed and patted Renmin on the back and comforted him by saying he will always be there for him and his heart had leapt); and the ever tortorous game that is intimacy, with Éguó's gentle and soft touches absolutely making him melt.

(One time he and Russia went camping - it had reminded him too much of Soviet too - and he had forgotten one of his sleeping bags and insisted he can sleep outside with no cover at all but Russia had argued he might grow cold and he did not want that to happen.

So Renmin had to handle being caressed by his good friend for the rest of the night, sleepless as he feels Russia's arm around his waist, holding him close and soft breaths on the nape of his neck, making Renmin absolutely warm.

And cold at the same time.)

Of course, he is quite discreet with his emotions and feelings, preferring to keep them in a box locked by heart and brain to all. Éguó will never know of his sinful feelings towards he and risk their vulnerable friendship.

Then the New Year's Eve party drops by like a bomb that will predict the unforeseen future.

Renmin looks at the reflection at the mirror, taking in all the features he had grown to absolutely loathe over the years- but he cannot help but shake off the insults he had created for himself. He hums a small song in his head as he buttons his shirt up and takes a comb to brush strands of his hair. He hears someone open his bedroom door and turns to smile at Éguó, who returns it brighter and even more with a burning passion.

"Let me help with that, Kitay", Éguó's hands roam around China's clothing and buttoning up his sleeves with gentle hands made his heart skip a beat, face a little red as he calms himself down.

"Thank you", Renmin lets out a steely breath as he looks towards Russia- so breath taking in his casual outfit, highlighting his body, making Renmin's mind spam him with sinful and atrocious thoughts.

"Let's go now, shall we?"

-

The New Year's Eve party was even messier than the Christmas Party Fēilǜbīn had arranged less than a week ago.

(Honestly, Liánhéguó, the decorations were quite tasteless and bland, and most of the fairy lights are not even working properly. The food was quite horrible to the point he had to consult sink water for remedy.)

Renmin groans as he feels a presence near him and looks to find Měiguó with her own cigarette in her mouth, she smiles at Renmin, full of hidden spite and resentment (the feeling is mutual, so he does not mind).

"Awesome New Year's, huh?", she asks as she blows out a puff of cigarette to the grossly light polluted air- the stars are, to their disadvantage, being taken out by this reckoning force that is luminscent bright light. Sometimes Renmin wonders if the twinkling stars are even alive to consider the fact that they are too dim by now.

Renmin rolls his eyes, taking out his pipe, "Why are you asking me?"

America rolls her eyes, "'Cause you kissed Japan in the Christmas Party."

Renmin lightly smirks; a simple tug on the corner of his lips, really.

Ah, America must be quite jealous of the make-out scene in Spin the Bottle; he can still recall the fervor deep inside of him, wanting to claw Japan apart like they were some play thing that had opened up to him- before immediately backing off when Japan said they were asexual.

Of course, he and Éguó adressed the matter of the video where Renmin and Ríběn had kissed; Russia had just smiled pearly white and told him he understood it was a dare, with perfect honey voice and no passive-aggressive words, hands clasped around his lap like an obedient queen in front of her king, eyes glinting of genuine joy.

(Renmin could not help but smile a little when he sees Russia grit his teeth when Renmin was jokingly retelling his story of how he made out with Ríběn like it was the end of the world. He had let out a tiny chuckle when Russia tilts his head and, with furrowed brows, tells China that Japan must've been a horrible kisser.

There was a hint of possessiveness and jealousy in Éguó's voice but China had paid no mind for it.)

At least he had fared well than Mongolia; the boy received an earful from Éguó after he watches the video of he carrying Hánguó to a private room to do the do. Mongolia was promising never to do that whole drama again, and vowing that he will take Belarus to dates every weekend or every free time.

"Don't worry, I don't like the bastard", Renmin tells America half-heartedly, "they're not my type."

The woman's brow lift up a bit, "Oh? Then who is?"

Renmin scowls, taking his pipe out of his mouth and wiping it, "That is absolutely none of your business."

He did not wait for America to catch up to him- and why should he? She is the one provoking him and asking the intrusive questions (albeit only one but still) and making him at the very least uncomfortable. He catches Éguó's eyes - who is arguing with Wūkèlán - and the former immediately pushes his brother out of the way and approaches Renmin with a tired smile.

"Your friend - Filippiny, was it? - asked everyone to join truth or dare."

Renmin sighs as he puts an arm around Éguó, "As long as you're joining, I'll come." Russia's eyes glint.

"Seriously? Hell yeah."

Russia is absolutely wasted and shit-faced after many a shots of vodka and wine from the secret stash Canada had brought to the party. Renmin holds a shot glass of vodka while trying to hide his red face from Éguó, who is currently laughing and head on his lap, the source of his embarrassment.

From the corner of Renmin's eye, he sees America look at them with a troublesome smirk, and Renmin knows she's planning something.

He hears Ríběn and Hánguó arguing near the buffet- the latter was screaming and shouting, voice going an octave higher to anyone's liking - it is too irritating, next time Hánguó will break glass - while Ríběn, acting as the more 'level-headed' of the two crosses their arms while softly bickering with the flailing man in front of him, frowning and lips pursed to a thin line (although this would be expected from they; Japan is never one for coaxing someone to a fight or openly gloating).

(Japan had used up all their diabolical, rancid smirks in their second life, the shrugs limited to gestures they do not know of, cruel words replaced with annoyed tones and passive-agressive wording as if the many bombs America had planted on their land and Sulian completely making Teikoku surrender made them use up their malice to the point it had all went dry.)

He pays them no mind- they can handle a fight or two until they realize they are both embarrassing themselves.

"So", a voice calls out, and Renmin perks up from a stupidly laughing and drunk Russia - he is in love with his beautiful laugh too - and finds Canada, with a smirk on his face, red eyes looking straight at Renmin and Éguó. "are you guys, like, fucking?"

Renmin completely sputters; he should not be surprised at the inappropriate question he had just uttered out, but he sprays the vodka he is drinking all over his clothes and on Éguó's face, who seems to be too much in a bliss to care what his friend had just done. Renmin picks up his shattered dignity and glares at Canada who remains confident.

"Did you realize what you just said?", he asks as he unconsciously pets Éguó's short light hair, soft underneath his fingers and absolutely making him warm inside. "We're not fucking- we're friends."

"Comrades", Éguó slurs with a small smile. "We're fucking comrades."

(Renmin's face turns a light shade of red- he did not know if Éguó is backing his claim that they are only comrades or if he is just very drunk to the point he had no idea whether he's humiliating the hell out of himself.)

"You aren't fucking yet, but you will fuck", Philip says not far from them, eyes only on his phone. His statement releases a few snickers from the room, directed towards an embarrassed Renmin and a drunk Éguó.

Renmin pinches the bridge of his nose, ignoring the hushed conversation and a few laughs surrounding him; he coaxes Éguó to stand up so he can leave himself, his lungs heaving and breathing, making him wish for another smoke. He takes his pipe out of his pocket once again and starts to light it up.

(From Renmin's personal experience, smoking is much better than snorting cocaine or any types of drugs- the inhalants may put him towards the path of ecstasy and relief, but he'd resume such depressing state soon after the damned drugs supposedly enlightening his life goes down the drain.)

He opens the door outside, receiving the chilly cold air with a small sigh, lips parting as he brings his pipe towards his mouth, the smoke forming like a wisp and trailing to the moon, despite the fact it is far away, in space, in the atmospheres beyond where he resides. Renmin holds his pipe, wanting to savor the relief, when he hears the door open. He sighs loudly (he has no time for his composure to remain in him), turning to find-

A drunk, stumbling Russia?

"Kitay." His name in Russian sounds so... so exotic, like Éguó is trying to spell out his name in the most unique of ways, tying the string of love Renmin tries to loosen closer, even closer to his friend. Renmin had tried hard to pull these strings of love away from him, from Éguó- yet Earth treats them like porcelain, shaping and weaving their love story to appease their audience from beyond this realm, beyond the naked eye, because they are only tools to this sickening love scheme that heavens above had made. He looks at his friend with a slight smile playing on his lips, puffing smoke out from his mouth as he watches Éguó stumble to his direction before chuckling and helping the poor drunk man up.

Renmin can smell his vodka-laced breath, but he did not lurch at the stench; he has been far too used to his friends addiction to drinking, it has become second nature for the both of them. China would be the sober one, helping Russia get to his knees with the shivering hope he can actually walk, and not the other way around; China will always drink intoxicating and alcoholic drinks in private, hating the way these drinks burn his throat and make him feel the onslaught of an oncoming headache the morrow.

"Shall we head to your place?", Renmin asks his friend softly (a tone that he will only use towards dearest friends and no one else), but the man whom Renmin is supporting shakes his head.

"No... yours." Renmin nods, as he - while holding his taller and much larger friend - towards his car, grunting and stumbling.

(It wasn't because Éguó was heavy, no, but it is due to how his friend just leans on him. Renmin is quite strong and can carry Russia with no problem, thank you very much.)

He puts Éguó on the passenger's seat, safely putting his seatbelt on and hears a storm of Russian swear words - many of which are now familiar to his ears - but still think of these strange mutterings as music to his ears. Yes, love can deafen a man's ears.

Renmin starts his car, closing the doors and locking it (because Éguó has the fatal fascination of opening cars when it's in motion while drunk) and stepping on the breaks to drive silently throughout the night. He'd rather wonder about the many theories of existence and the different planes he exists upon rather than how Russia is still oblivious of Renmin's feelings, but, he is grateful this way.

They got to Renmin's place in absolutely no time, like time has slowed down and that the night is still young, still fragile, despite the fact it is midnight and the moon is shining a bright light. He parks the car near his home, looking at Éguó who - surprisingly - is trying to put himself to sleep.

Renmin loves the warmth surrounding him as he props Éguó up, who was pretty sleepy from the way he breathes evenly. Renmin smiles faintly, opening the door all by himself as he makes his way towards the guest room, and plopping Éguó down on the soft bed, causing the man to whine.

"Kitay." Renmin stops, looking at Russia with a questioning look. The man on the bed motions for him to come near them, and Renmin obliges; perhaps they need a drink, after all, they will have a horrible hangover tomorrow, or maybe they want to greet him a good night before they drift off to a heavy sleep, or he wants both of them to be in the same bed, sleeping under the covers-

He absolutely did not expect lips on his mouth, and the hard grasp of his shoulders and pushing him down towards Éguó's bigger and much muscular body. Renmin hides a gasp as his friend's (will he still call him friend after this?) tongue asks to enter his closed mouth, still feeling the hot breath on his lips and mouth, the hands holding onto his legs, the... arousal growing in him. He denies Russia the permission to guide him across the caves of his mouth, trying - half-heartedly - to escape his firm grip but Russia bites his lower lip and Renmin yelps; forcing Russia's tongue to enter.

He shudders; he remembers feeling this way when he and Soviet Union lost their virginity to each other, the hot and warmest touches resonating in them as they tear one another apart, biting and kicking and absolutely loving the way their sinful touches go lower, lower, lower.

He promises himself never to do it again, after his secret marriage with Sulian was annulled- null.

Then for the first time in decades, he opens his body up for his friend.

And his friend just so happens to be the once love of his life.

(Technically, Éguó has replaced Sulian with that title, now Sulian is just a void deep in Renmin's mind, calling out to him, wishing for him to return to his arms but he refuses, turning his back on him.)

As Éguó's tongue snakes up towards his cave, tasting, exploring the wet taverns of his mouth, China didn't notice one of Russia's hands going towards his lower body, clutching his growing arousal through his pants. Renmin moans as he feels him carress and make it even harder, letting himself become weak, surrendering himself to Russia. He feels him smile as he breaks the kiss, with Renmin whining from the loss of the heat in his tongue, before embarrassingly covering his mouth (either from the needy whine or realizing he has a trail of saliva coming down from his throat, he will never know), but Éguó gently traces his cheeks with his fingers, while his other hand pleasures Renmin's arousal.

"For all these years", Éguó breathes, hot on his face, "after teasing me, toying with me, playing with me for an unneeded amount of time, I finally have you in my hands." With a grunt, Russia reverses their position, now Russia is straddling Renmin and grinding on his legs and Renmin whining and moaning, arching his back so his arousal can hit Russia's leg for more friction. Russia tuts, unzipping his pants and boxers to let his member out, and Renmin gasps as the cold air hits him, enveloping and wrapping him around as the other man above him takes off his own shirt to let Renmin see the glory of he being shirtless.

(Well, it's not very surprising at the least- he and Russia had been taking their shirts off one another, making the former too heated to even function at the sight of Russia's shirtless and looking at himself and asking why he does not look like a wax statue unlike his friend, flawless and scarless and undaunting, looking at Renmin with a pointed look as if he's waiting for him to take his shirt off so they can bathe in a river spring during their camping trip-)

Renmin gasps as he feels a warm feeling surrounding his length, the tongue like a heatwave of many a desserts trying to puncture and make Renmin collapse to no effort at all. The hands snaking up his thighs, indicating factor that they are both going to do this scandalous and disgusting doing, and Renmin will experience another taking of his virginity and this time by Sulian's son.

He grips onto the covers, making a mental note that after all this is over, this... nightmare dream is over, he must take Éguó to another room to fabricate evidence they had done anything horrible at all. Russia must not know; if he does, he will trash around and throw a tantrum when he realized what he had done to Renmin and stop talking to him for the rest of his life.

A part of Renmin wanted to push Éguó off, away from him, and escape through the doors he knows he should have gone through before Russia wishes to talk to him (who is he to deny his friend a request?) but the part of desire wanted this, this momentous occassion to happen, where he is pinned down by Éguó and kissing him with a burning passion, marking him as his and always will be his, subduing him, loving him and treating him roughly to a varying degree and caring for him afterwards.

He listens to the latter part of his as he feels a pool in his stomach, wanting to be released into Russia's mouth, who is still working him up, ruining him, making him whine like the needy baby he was. China grits his teeth, as Russia licks up the length of his member and he cries;

"Éguó, I'm going to-" he screams as he unleashes a torrent of liquid into the man's mouth, white liquid staining Russia's face slightly and Renmin's chest; he breathes, shaking, embarrassed at the mess he made and wondering how his friend would react to this.

(Would he inexplicably tease him? Play and toy with him until he breaks? Would he encourage him release after release or would he just hammer down into him?)

"Aw, look at you, making a mess before we actually get the fun started", Russia coos, making Renmin flustered to even function, feeling himself practically die of embarrassment- he reminds himself to have a much firmer resolve, not giving into the pooling desire nor the pleasure Éguó has given him.

(He remembers the subtle touches Sulian does underneath the table, every time they'd had dinner together; the way his hands roam around Renmin's thigh as he eats or talks, trying to get a whine out of him to drop his spoon force his mouth to form a whine of all sorts. He remembers Sulian's cheeky smirk, lust-filled eyes and golden eyes staring back at his, waiting.

Renmin could not even last a playing and teasing with Russia's father, already pleading with the man on top of him to finish him off.)

"Do you have any lube?", Russia asks as he searches the room - the guest room, Renmin's mind supplies - for any possible places he could potentially have hidden any form of lubricant, and China absolutely knows where they are.

"I have them in my room...", he says suggestively, propping himself up with his hands, still under Russia's body, feeling his erect length on his thighs.

(Needless to say, he is just as turned on as Éguó was.)

Russia raises a brow, "Oh? Then go get it, Kitay." The way he says his name in Russian makes Renmin want to grind into him, pleading with him to finally pleasure him in the most abstract of ways, touching him in certain parts friends absolutely do not touch, ramming into him las he arches his back to get hit with more and more pleasure, screaming and biting his lips as Russia can go on and on.

China nods, and Russia gets up for the man beneath him to go fetch the lube in his room-

(This is the chance; to run straight to his room and lock the door, breathless and sweating and currently in a state of shock and heartbreak, quietly and slowly leaning down to cry, hoping Éguó would forget what has happened in the morning- to greet Russia with a smile and a cup of coffee in his wake, talking casually with no mention of their heated night that almost delved into the passion and-)

Renmin takes the bottle of lube from the drawers; full of toys, plugs, and every mention of sex ever. He remembers how he pulls them out whenever he was heated, tugging at them, panting as they enter him, loving the way they pleasure him yet hating the way they are not real skin. (And maybe the fact he wants to play with his entrance more than a healthy dose, yes.) He comes back to Russia, who has now stripped from his clothes; China's eye trail down from Russia's sweat-filled chest down towards his-

"We aren't supposed to do this", Renmin chokes - either from the size of it or from the sinful deed - looking at his friend dead in the eye. They were only supposed to be friends, comrades, brothers without a blood, not whatever sick and mangled game they are playing right now. There was something hot on his eye, turning the world blurry until he blinks, unleashing a warm trail down his cheeks. "W-we're supposed to be j-just brothers-"

He covers his mouth as he chokes back a sob- no matter how much his sick and disgusting mind wanted the man in front of him, nude and vulnerable, they could not do this. He feels two hands on his shoulders, but he does not dare look up from his hands.

Many thoughts ring in his mind at once.

He did not want this.

This is sinful and against what the two of them have stated.

He did not want to be subdued, to be a part of another's desire playing by.

But the sinful mind of his only pays attention to melting the icy desire frozen by a block of ice.

He wanted this.

He oh so wanted this.

It makes his sob even harder, as Russia's hands play with his hair before letting him lean into his chest - Renmin can smell the pure vodka and obnoxious amount of perfume on the other's - Éguó's arms snaking around China's back, tracing his finger tips on his scars, soothingly rubbing his back as Renmin continues to sob and choke and cough.

After a few more soft whispers in his ear, the quick kisses on the nape of his neck, and the feeling of Éguó's strong and sturdy arms snaking up and down his back did Renmin finally calm down, looking up at the taller's grey eyes, a mix of lust, desire, and concern.

"Are you sure you wish to do this?", Éguó asks, "before you are my lover, you are my friend."

Without a beat, Renmin kisses Éguó, to the latter's surprise, a choked sound coming from the other man as he holds the both of them closer, together, a perfect cadence of their love residing in the room, echoing as their hearts beat as one, creating a symphony only their skin can hear and feel. And Russia's soft grip becomes firm, calloused fingers digging into his back, deepening the kiss as he feels Renmin whine for even more.

No more was Renmin's intellect.

It has been overcome by the overwhelming amount of desire, his soul wanting this, wanting him to submit, to play the role of the girl.

Renmin then feels the other weigh into him, and he feels himself being pushed towards the general comforts of the bed, legs spread out, arms above him which are being held at the wrists by Éguó, looking at him with the utmost prosperity of lust. Renmin breathes in shallowly; they were about to do this, and nothing is stopping them.

-

He knows he should not be savoring this. Renmin bites his lip, trying to keep the tears inside of himself despite the fact his tear ducts has severely betrayed him during the night, with Éguó testing his patience and desire, moving up and down, smirking at the sight of China so submissive, whining and mewling as he thrusts into his tight caves with first his slender fingers and then with his entire length. Renmin remembered being a mess, begging, wanting more, wanting him to thrust into a spot as his back arches and he holds onto Russia for dear comfort.

But now the session is done, he cannot just construct the walls that had been broken by just one flicker of an eye from Russia, turning his insides to soft jelly. He feels the short breathes on his neck - although he is used to it by many camping trips and soft platonic cuddles at the back of the car - and the long hands wrapping around him, ensuring that he is there, safely tucked, and safe. Other times, he would snuggle deeper into Russia, but this was not those other times; they slept with each other, fucked, and they both enjoyed every moment of it.

Renmin tries not to get the horrible tendrils of sleep take him to dreamland until morning when Éguó realizes what they both had done and leave his home, scarred. How was he going to tell Éguó? Was he going to make himself forget all about this, give Russia a doll smile as he wakes up with a terrible hangover? Or will he tell the truth and risk their damned friendship he has built himself upon?

Renmin closes his eyes, trying to still his excited and enamouring heart, plunging up scenarios for him to discuss before his brain denies it all.

Then his visions supply him with a dream; a dream where he and Russia are actual lovers, in a world where they weren't so blatantly homophobic, reaching out into the other universes to make them get a hold of their relationship.

(Russia would touch his cheek passionately, caressing him and Renmin sighing as he leans into his touch with a sigh and a smile, knowing that he'd only be his for the rest of his life.

"I am your lover", Renmin would say with such love in his eyes, kissing the top of Russia's forehead, brushing away his blonde hair and Éguó will hold him closer, kissing him to the moon and back with a burning passion, as if they accepted the fact they are in love in the first place. Renmin will feel a hand on his hip, leaning in and deepening the kiss.

After they break, Russia will smile warmly, his hands ruffling China's dark hair and saying, "I am your lover as well."

And they will love, love with all their hearts- draw little heart strings over their shoulders, kiss in the sunset unhindered, touch each other in parts they thought will be sinful and disgusting, but they will not care anymore.

They are lovers.)

Renmin wants to scream.

Why is he like this.

That is not a question.

-

China didn't even notice he had given in to the lullabies of sleep rocking him back and forth until he is shoved off the bed. He yelps as he feels the hard floors and the absolute pain in his back. He opens his eye, then looks up at Éguó, looking panicked and covering himself with the stain blankets. His mind is blank first, asking himself why Russia had just shoved him off the bed, then a fast forward of all his memories from last night gives his stomach a lurch.

"Gǒu shǐ... Èluósī... Wǒ...", he chokes, trying to find his voice, "kěyǐ jiěshì."

Éguó shakes his head, taking a step back, his blue eyes full of horror as he realizes what he'd done. "Net, there is nothing to explain, Kitay."

[master-sass-blast]

Whole list for Ellie, pls!!!!

Can diddly do, darling! Going under a cut, because again, Longe.

What is their favourite food: Mac and cheese. Cheesy potatoes. Pizza. Really, any combination of cheese and carbs.

Do they have a fear of an animal? If so, what animal: She’s not a fan of seagulls. Stupid fucking sky rats.

What do they wear to bed: Whatever. Actual pajamas, leggings and shirt, t shirt and gym shorts, whatever works.

Do they like cuddling: Yes, but she doesn’t initiate much after losing her family due to dealing with the trauma from that.

Do they have a secret handshake with anyone: She has one with Leo that changes every time they do it. It mostly exists to annoy Zach.

What do they look like: Ellie is a Very Petite, 13 year old girl, with pale skin, a round face, round, dark brown eyes, a button nose, pouty lips, and stick straight, pitch black hair. She’s too cute to be a mini-vessel of anger and murder.

Do they like chocolate: Yes. She loves chocolate. She’ll straight up eat it for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Frank nearly has a coronary over her dietary habits, but he doesn’t have room to complain because he eats stuff straight out of a can with his Ka-bar.

What are their good and bad traits: Ellie is innovative, creative, and determined, but also aggressive, headstrong to the point of being difficult to work with, and steps past a lot of rules in order to “experiment” with different ideas.

Do they have any artistic talent: She plays the violin and eventually winds up taking dance classes and theater classes with Leo as a way to “keep her brain happy” (at the suggestion of David), but that’s about it.

What is their favourite room to be in, in the house they live in: Once Ellie, Frank, and Karen finally settle in a house? The dining room. They all spend the most time together there.

Do they believe in luck: No. There’s coincidence and probability, but luck in and of itself cannot be scientifically proven. Besides, luck is for people who don’t believe in effort.

Can they do magic: Real magic? No. Sleight of hand magic? Also no.

Do they believe in dragons: As a possible, past existing creature? The common media depictions had to come from somewhere.

What is a pet peeve of theirs: Being talked down to. She can’t stand it. She’s smart, she knows she’s smart, and she will be spoken to as such, thank you very much.

What was the last thing they cried about: In the order of the story? Being adopted by Frank and Karen, though she does get weepy over losing her family (as is natural).

What is their sexuality: She’s a babby gay, and later identifies as a lesbian when she’s older.

Do they have a best friend? If so, who, and what makes them their best friend: Leo Lieberman. They bond while Frank helps David keep an eye on his family, over their mutual love for academics and learning things, and from there they’re just... *crosses fingers* like that.

Have they ever been in a romantic relationship: Yes. Ellie and Leo do wind up dating (once they’re older, which probably won’t be covered in the story, but their mutual interest is hinted at).

What does their relationship with their family look like? Are they close? Distant? Ect: Before her biological family’s passing, she was closest with one her four brothers, Andrew, who was closest to her in age at 21. She was relatively close with her other siblings, save for her sister, whom she is heavily estranged from. Her biological mother died when she was two, and her biological father abused her by exploiting her intellect and mutation set for his own gain, but it takes Ellie a while to recognize that. Post being adopted by Frank and Karen, she’s closer to Frank due to having spent more time with him, but she still loves Karen dearly.

Do they have a pet: In the “good ending,” they get a black and white pitbull named Oreo.

Do they have a familiar: Still dunno what that is, so no.

Are they a supernatural being: Nope.

How do they usually wear their hair: Ellie’s hairstyle changes throughout the story/series. It’s longer at the beginning, then she shaves her head when Frank does (because she asks and he figures there’s no harm so he helps her shave her head), then grows it out longer on the top like he does in S2 of the Punisher, then wears it as an angled bob for S3 of Daredevil, and by the end of the story it’s about shoulder-length again. Eventually, she settles on switching between on longer on the top, shorter sides and the angled bob as her favorites.

Can they play an instrument? If so, what instrument and what can they play: The violin, and she plays just about anything on it.

What type a high schooler are/were they: Ellie graduated high school at the age of nine, so... yeah.

Have they ever been in a physical fight before? If so, with who? Who won: Several. It comes with the territory with being Frank’s “sidekick.” She wins most of them, though does take some notable loses to Billy Russo and Agent Pointdexter.

What is their favourite holiday: Halloween. Hands down.

If they could have one wish, what would they wish for: She doesn’t necessarily believe in wishes, since they usually create various paradoxes.

Do they wants kids? If they already have kids, do they want more: She’s too young to consider having kids during the story, but when she gets older she decides she doesn’t necessarily want any.

Do they have a job: She’s thirteen, so no.

Do they know how to drive: Yes. Her biological father made a point of teaching her how to handle just about any vehicle or craft.

Do they get stressed out easily: Not really. She has her snapping points (being talked down to, people she cares about getting hurt, etc), but all in all she’s pretty easy going.

Did they ever dye their hair before? If so, to what colour? Did they like it: She dyes it magenta when she’s sixteen with Karen’s help and LOVES it.

Have they ever broken the law: Yes. Many times. So many times.

Do they own a plant: Ellie and Frank both fall into the category of “would kill a plastic plant, somehow,” so no.

Have they ever rode a horse before: No.

What is their favorite gif: Don’t have an answer for this, so pass.

Do they get along with others easily: Not really. Ellie can run the end of being argumentative and superior, so she can be difficult to get along with at times.

Do they have any tattoos: Nope.

If I wanted to draw them, what would be distinct physical features that I would have to know to draw them correctly: She has to look like the most innocent, adorable, non-murdery teenage ever. Round face, button nose, big, round eyes, pouty lips, whole nine yards. Very pale skin, very dark hair, very dark eyes.

What is their favourite breed of dog: Ellie hasn’t met a dog she didn’t like.

Do they live with anyone? If so, who: Frank, at the beginning of the story, and then Frank and Karen at the end.

Where is their dream vacation: Ellie traveled a lot when she was younger due to her biological dad’s line of “work,” so she’s seen good chunks of the world. She’d probably enjoy going back to France or Iceland the most, though.

Do they know more than one language: Yes. Ellie speaks English, German, Mandarin, Japanese, Spanish, and Arabic fluently, and is conversational in French and Italian.

Are they a quick learner: Extremely.

Have they ever won a contest before? If so, what for? What did they win: Not really. Her biological father had her more focused on studying as much as she could, so she didn’t enter any contests growing up.

If the world were to end in 24 hours, where would they be and who would they be with: She’d stick close to Frank, Karen, Curtis, and the Liebermans.

What does their room look like: In the “good ending,” Ellie’s room is painted shades of purple and blue, and has a desk with a chair, a dresser, and a double bed in it.

If they could have an extinct animal for a pet, what would they have: Probably a Dodo bird.

If they got called out by someone, what would they do: Argue with them. Ellie’s “flight mode” was replaced with extra fight.

Have they ever shot a gun before: Yes.

Have they ever been axe throwing: No.

What is something that they want but can’t have: The ability to kill the worst billionaires of the world and redistribute their funds to those who need them, and that’s only because there’s no way to do that without getting caught and getting other people in trouble.

Do they know how to fish: No.

What is something they always wanted to do but too scared: Scuba diving.

Do they own their own baby pictures: No.

What makes them standout among others: The way she speaks. She’s very intense in her voice and how she talks, which draws a lot of attention.

Do they like to show off: Yes. One hundred percent. She likes the praise.

What is their favourite song: It changes, but one of her consistent faves is “I Love It” by Icona Pop.

What would be their dream vehicle: Stealth bomber jet.

What is their favourite book: Percy Jackson series.

Who, in their opinion, makes the best food: Karen. Frank eats MREs like they’re going out of style.

Are they approachable: She looks it, but she doesn’t talk it.

Did they ever change their appearance: Yeah. She goes through a few phases of figuring out what style suits her best as she grows up.

What makes them smile: Dumb jokes, making Frank, Karen, and Leo laugh, and fail compilations.

Do they like glowsticks: Sure. Who doesn’t?

What is something that is simple, but always makes them smile: Seeing/talking to Leo.

Are they a day or night person: Night.

Are they allergic to anything: Nope.

What do you, the creator of this OC, like most about them: She’s a spitfire, and she challenges Frank to come out of his shell more.

Who is their ride or die: Frank, Karen, Curtis, and the Lieberman family.

Do they currently have a significant other? If not, are they going to get one later one: She and Leo date when they’re older, but that probably won’t be featured in any of the stories.

What attracts them to another person: Intelligence, humor, and willingness to question rules, ethics, and morals.

Who is one person that can always make them laugh: Leo Lieberman.

Have they ever partied too hard and their friends had to take them home: No.

Who would be their cuddle buddy: Leo is her first go to, but Frank and Karen also step up when she needs/wants it.

Who would cheer them up after a long day: Probably Frank, Karen, or Leo.

If they had a nightmare, who would they run to: Frank or Karen. They understand having the types of nightmares that she has.

What object to the care for the most: A phone built for her by her deceased brother, Andrew.

Do they like other people’s children: Eh, not really.

How would they react if someone broke into their home: Kill the intruder.

Does anyone make them have butterflies in their stomach: Leo Lieberman.

What is something that they are good at: Aside from her innate talents, she’s good at crossword puzzles.

What is their neutral expression: She looks like an adorable woodland fairy.

Do they like to cook: Not really.

What is something they can’t leave home without: The phone her brother built for her. It has access to her family’s private satellite network, their stores of information and blackmail data, and their private bank accounts.

Who is someone that they rely on: Frank. Ellie relies on him for protection (despite her abilities, she’s still thirteen) and companionship.

Do they liked to be tickled: Only by Leo.

Have they ever been a sword fight before: Yes.

What is a joke that they would find funny: Any dumb pun in existence.

Do they have a place that can go and turn off their brain: The Lieberman’s house. She really just gets to be a kid there.

What was their childhood like: Kinda tragic, considering her family’s death and the abuse she took from her biological father and sister.

What are they like as an adult: Ellie comes out well-adjusted, all things considered. She does land in the anti-social personality disorder spectrum, but she’s high-functioning and can blend in with society, for the most part. She does wind up picking up the Punisher mantle when Frank retires, citing that “someone needs to purge the city of its scum” as her reason.

Do they take criticism well: If it’s well founded? Sure. If it isn’t? Absolutely not.

Have they ever jumped out of a plane: No.

Who do they like to make jokes with: Frank, Karen, and Leo.

Have you ever drawn them before? If you are comfortable with it, would you post a picture: I have, but I don’t have anything of her I want to post yet.

[boysintears]

It all started in that Coffee Shop // Peter Parker

Warnings: none

Words: 1.927

A/N: this is my entry for @wokeupinawalnut ‘s challenge, i chose the prompt gay pride and coffee shop au wih my baby Peter Parker ; i hope you guys like this, it’s my first time writing for marvel

i’ve got a feeling this isn’t the coffee shop au it started out to be.. also the reader is norwegian/ has norwegian roots

this is college Peter in a world where infinity war never happened

The new coffee shop near campus only opened a few months ago but still Peter has been going there every single day since the opening. The coffee wasn’t the best he ever drank, to be honest. But also the best he ever drank was Mister Stark’s coffee and who knows how expensive that is.

On the day of opening, the shop was nearly empty when Peter arrived. Just a boy behind the counter and two girls cleaning the tables. The shop had a homey feeling, not like a Starbucks or something quite the opposite actually. There were small tables with wing chairs and armchairs sitting around, the tables in the corners of the store had couches, and the lights were always dimmed to a nice warm glow.

The boy was leaning on the counter, a large grin on his face, he looked at Peter. “Look girls! It’s our first customer!” Without waiting for an answer the guy leaned even farther on the counter. “What can I bring you, first customer?”  “Uh,  a-a “, Peter started stuttering.

“Leave the poor boy alone! He’s not only going to be our first but also our last customer if you keep being this weird”, one of the girls called from the back of the shop. Rolling his eyes the boy backed off and turned his attention back to Peter. “How about I’ll bring you a coffee?” “That’d be nice. Thank you” The boy winked at him, “I’m Y/N by the way” “Peter Parker”

Mustering the boy closer he noticed a few pins on his apron. One with the logo of some band, another one with the Iron man mask, a third one, smaller than the first two with a little Spider-man on it, which made Peter fangirl a little bit, and lastly a pin roughly the same size as the Spider-man one completely painted with a rainbow.

Looking up again he noticed the boy looking at him with a thoughtful expression on his face. “If you’re going to say anything against that you can leave and never come back”, he said in a grave voice.

Frantically shaking his head no, Peter started to stutter once more. “N-no. Nothing against that. Completely fine with it. No problems here. Trust me”

The corner of his mouth twitched slightly upwards as the other turned around again to receive the ordered coffee.

That first encounter with Y/N was gladly not the last, but definitely the weirdest they ever had. The times after that one morning, were of a more normal nature and after a few weeks the boys developed a routine. Peter came in the shop, Y/N yelled his name, or one of the many nicknames Peter now had, and turned around to make him his usual. Sometimes he would make him something new, something that Peter never had before, just so the boy could be amazed by Y/N’s amazing brewing skills.

And Peter loved it. The routine, the coffee, the conversations with Y/N that were the same kind of nerdy and amazing as his talks with Ned, and dare he say that, sometimes even more amazing. There was just something he couldn’t describe. A warm feeling on his insides that came when he saw Y/N.

To be honest, he could not imagine living without this warm sensation ever again. It became a part of him, a part of his routine. And quite frankly his favourite part of the day.

So it was devastating for him when he couldn’t come to see his friend for a whole two weeks. Mister Stark took him on a mission and he was hurt while fighting. The billionaire wouldn’t let him out of his sight until Peter was fully recovered.  

Clearly it was only natural that the first thing Peter did, after he could finally escape Tony’s hawk eyes, was going to the coffee shop. Coming in the shop was nearly empty. Only a small group of people where sitting at a table in the corner and talking quietly. He couldn’t see Y/N. The other two waitresses were standing behind the counter, talking.

Peter slowly went up to them. “Hey, isn’t Y/N here today?” “He’s been sick the last few days”, one of them replied with a smile. “You’re friends right? Maybe you could visit him? He always gets so closed off and cranky when he’s sick”, the other chuckled.

“Uh, yeah, I-I mean sure! Can you give me his address? Please?” “Oh you don’t know? I always thought you two would hang out together” After Peter shook his head in a soft motion, one of them pulled out a small notebook and jutted down Y/N’s address before ripping the piece of paper out and handing it to Peter.  

It took the spider boy a while to find the right apartment building, his knowledge of the city was huge but it was way easier to find your way when your swinging though the air.

He got nervous all of a sudden. If Y/N really got so cranky while he’s sick, would he even want to see him? Or would he just send him away? Oh god, what if he was angry that he got his address and just showed up?

Oh maybe he shouldn’t do this. This was a bad idea. But he was already standing in front of the door. And later on he would definitely regret not talking to Y/N. He also missed the warm feeling that always appeared as soon as Y/N smiled at him.

Squeezing his eyes together he took a deep breath and raised his hand to knock at the apartment door. But before his knuckles could touch the wood the door was pulled open and Y/N was standing in front of him with a small smile playing on his lips.

“Oh fuck”, Peter breathed out as he got a good look at the other boy. He really looked like shit. His skin was as white as a sheet of paper; but the bags underneath his eyes as dark as the night. His hair was falling in front of his eyes, looking like it hasn’t been washed in a while.

Letting his eyes wander further down, he saw that Y/N was only in a really baggy shirt that was long enough to nearly hide the boxers he was wearing.

His eyes snapped back up when he heard his opposite chuckle. “If you’re done checking me out you’re welcome to come in”, he told him, his voice fitting to his ill appearance perfectly, with the scratch and the rough undertone.  

Hesitantly Peter followed his friend into his apartment. “You haven’t be-” “I’m sorry” Confused Y/N turned around. “What for?” “I shouldn’t have gotten your address without asking you first. It was a dumb idea to just show up. I should probably go. I-”, Peter already turned back to the door, ready to leave, when Y/n grabbed his sleeve. “Hey, Pete. Calm down. It’s okay”, he was interrupted by a violent cough, “Sorry. I don’t have anything against you showing up. I’m actually kinda glad you’re here”

“Really?” Y/N gave him a soft nod. Still having a grip on Peter’s arm, he pulled him towards the couch and let himself slump on the pile of blankets and pillows. “I always get so closed of when I’m not feeling so good. I rarely see or talk to anybody until I’m myself again. Also I-I kinda missed you”, the last part of the sentence he mumbled into the collar of his shirt, as he pulled it over his nose. His cheeks also slowly tinted with red, but Peter couldn’t tell if it was because of his sickness or because of the reason he really hoped for.

“I missed you too”, he replied in a sudden flash of confidence, regretting it as soon as it came out of his mouth. Letting himself slouch on the couch he lowered his gaze away from Y/N to his feet, feeling heat crawling up his neck.

He could feel the couch dip as Y/N slowly shimmied himself nearer to him. Laying a hand on Peters neck, Y/N pressed a small kiss on Peters cheek and let his head fall onto his shoulder; only to raise it a second later, falling into a fit of coughs.

“You know, if I wouldn’t know better, I’d say you’re blushing because of me”, he chuckled after. “Well I could say the same about you, you dumb barista” “Well, maybe I am blushing because of you” Looking at him sceptically, Peter let out a small huff of air. “Why would you be blushing because of me. You’re so sick that you’re lies don’t even make sense”

Y/N’s expression moved from startled to angry. “You’re cute and nice and have a great sense of humor. That’s why I’m blushing, because I have this huge crush on you!” Whipping his head around to look at him Peter started to stutter. “Wh- you- w-. You what?”, he replied sheepishly.

“I have a huge crush on you and I was hoping you had the same feelings for me. The way you looked at me and the blushing and the way you laughed at my jokes no matter that none of those were funny. I was so sure! But it’s okay, I understand that I was wrong and I won’t mention it again”, he choked out, his voice breaking and become really quiet.  

Peter didn’t know what to say. Y/N just confessed his feelings for him and he didn’t know what to say. He started to panic when Y/N started to move away from him. “I’m stupid”, he blurted out. The sick boy looked up at him, wetness clearly shining in is eyes. “I’m stupid”, he repeated. “I don’t know what to say, because you just threw your feelings at me and I am sitting here staring at you, while you’re starting to cry, instead of admitting that I too have a huge crush on you” “You don’t have to say that. I rather you reject me now, instead of leading me on”, Y/N rasped out.

Shaking his head furiously, Peter followed him to the other end of the couch, holding him still by the shoulders. “I am not saying that to make you feel better. I really do have this crush on you. And I wish I realized that sooner instead of thinking I’m straight, when I’m clearly not. I wish I realized sooner that this warm, sparkly feeling in my chest is not just brotherly love but real love. That I fell for the most amazing boy. I wish I confessed sooner and wouldn’t make us both cry”, he laughed shakily with the first tear rolling down his cheek.  

“I would kiss you right now if you weren’t sick Y/N” “I would kiss you too”, he snuffled. Slowly Peter laid his face in the crook of Y/N’s neck. “Does that mean I can take you out on cheesy, cliché dates now and introduce you as my boyfriend?” “But you didn’t even ask me to be your boyfriend yet” “Y/N Kjell Thorsen would you do me the honor and be my boyfriend?”, he asked without lifting his head up. Chuckling softly he replied “Why yes Peter Benjamin Parker, I’d love to call myself you’re boyfriend” “I’m glad”, the hero murmured and pressed a small kiss to the skin of Y/N’s neck.

“I know this really cute coffee shop I can take you to when you’re not sick anymore” “Are you trying to take me on a date in my own shop?” “Maybe”

Masterlist • Drabbles • Ships

(my requests are open btw)

[boiwribitch]

That makes it worse...

Hey y'all! This is my first written thing on my writing blog! This is going to be a lot of self projecting feat. Klance. You might understand why, or maybe not? I dunno, we'll see :)

It was a night of diplomatic affairs. Aka, not something Keith was excited about in the slightest.

Allura and Coran were throwing a party, in the castle, to welcome an alien race into the the fight against the Galra empire. While Keith himself wasn't a part of Voltron anymore, the Blade was also invited to dine and be present at the meeting portion.

Keith didn't want to go at first, in fact he kinda still didn't want to be there. But there was one changing factor that ultimately triggered his need to be present. And that was a certain Blue eyed boy and his friends.

It was a formal event, so that indicated that everyone had to dress in a suit or a dress. When Keith arrived, in a suit that the Blade provided for him, he quickly saw people pouring in and out of the ballroom area. Immediately his nerves go still at the thought of being stuck in a room with not only most of an alien race, but also a quarter of the Blade. Not to mention his teammates.

Before Keith had the chance to scan the room for a group of humans, assuming they would all stick together in a mass, he heard a shout from his left. There, standing in front of the food table, was Lance, Hunk, and Pidge waving him down. Keith quickly broke away from his Blade posy to greet his old team.

As he walked up to the group, he got a better look at their attire and appearance. Pidge was in a dark green cocktail dress that had a trim of silver on the bottom and top, while the chest area had a silver sequence design of a rose. Her hair was combed and in a high ponytail with a lighter green headband, on her arms were long white gloves that came up to her elbows. Pidge's neck was shown to have a dark green collar which had designs painted with silver glitter. She looked stunning and mature, despite the fact that Pidge also sported tennis shoes with long white socks with the entire look.

Hunk wore black slacks with a light red belt, alone with a sunflower yellow dress shirt that was accompanied with a red and red striped tie. Hunk also had a dark brown vest that loosely draped over his shoulders, and was left unbuttoned. His shoes were black dress shoes with a golden buckle near the ankle. Keith noticed that Hunk was not wearing his usual orange bandanna and instead had his hair slicked back into a low ponytail. Hunk looked about as nervous as Keith felt, he didn't exactly look comfortable, but he was smiling as bright as Keith remembered.

And then there was Lance, and it's sad to say that Keith's first reaction was to do a double take just make sure that what he was seeing looked as good as he thought. Lance wore something slightly more flashy and scandalous than Pidge and Hunk, but that was only to be expected because... Its Lance. He had a sky blue sleeveless vest that was slightly unbuttoned at the top. On his neck, there were gold and pearl chains hanging loosely, whilst is looked like there was one that only had a string and a small shell. His black pants looked slightly tighter and maybe a size too small, but still fit his form to perfection. Lance also... Wasn't wearing shoes? Interesting? Anyway, his hair seemed to have been slicked over to the left of his head while sporting a single earring on his right ear. Needless to say, Lance absolutely looked stunning and gorgeous.

Keith almost felt embarrassed, his outfit was just a simple dark blue suit with light magenta trim.

Before he could get lost in his own thoughts, Hunk hands him a drink and makes some off handed comment about how boring the party has been.

“You look good...” he hears Lance mumble, and blushes slightly. Keith turns to see that Lance is looking anywhere but Keith and instead at a group of alien ladies that looks to be whispering among themselves. His slight bit of hope was quickly demolished and any reason he had to arrive all of a sudden seems pointless. But, Keith had to remember that he wasn’t just there for Lance; he was also there to visit his Castle family. While he doesn’t like to admit it, Keith absolutely considers the people he has been fighting alongside in this war, as his family.

Lance and Pidge had gone off to mingle, leaving Keith and Hunk at the buffet table. Keith glances over to see Hunk staring at him.

"Hey bud, is something bothering you?", Hunk asked with a worried expression. Keith didn't think that he even looked distracted or distressed, but he guess it would be hard to tell without being able to look at himself at the moment.

Thinking he was quiet for too long, Keith said, "Oh, yeah, I'm fine don't worry about it". Keith was bad at lying and he knew it. The only thing that was on his mind was Lance, and how stunning he looked and how his smile could light up a room and his laugh and- how could he possibly fall for a straight guy?! Keith had a plan on whether to ask out Lance or not, but he decided against it for the sake of Lance being straight.

"Nah man, I know you, there is something that is annoying your brain hole", Hunk said as he started poking Keith's forehead with the back of a spoon.

"Listen, its just a personal internal crisis... Its nothing you should worry about", Keith mumbled, beginning to get annoyed at the continuous spoon poking.

"A gay crisis?", Hunk said with a sly grin on his face.

Keith was immediately embarrassed and started stumbling over his words, trying to ask Hunk how he knew? Had he been that obvious? Was Hunk messing with him? What was he supposed to do?

"Keith, man, chill out. Don't worry, I won't tell anybody. I'm just wondering why you haven't asked him yet", Hunk said, putting a hand on Keith's shoulder. Keith slowly looked up and stood up straight.

Speaking of straight... "Hunk, I can't. I would have while I was still here, but I don't think he feels the same anyway. Hell, the guy is straight! What am I supposed to do now?!", Keith exclaimed with slight anger and sadness in his voice.

"You know he's Bi, right?"

"Wait... What?"

"Yeah, he's Bi. Dude, for chemistry class back at the Garrison he literally tye-dyed his shirt the Bi pride flag", Hunk told him as if Keith would know about this. Keith almost couldn't believe it, almost couldn't believe him.

"Are-Are you sure?"

"Keith, buddy, I am 100% sure he is Bi"

"I-I..."

"Keith, honestly, you should go for it! I can see you two being a thing and just- being you guys! I dunno man, all I think is that you should go for it!"

"Hunk... Thank you... Thank you so much! You gave me... At least some-", Keith manages to choke out until he stops mid sentence. Has he really thought about this? This entire time Keith had stayed away from asking out Lance simply because he thought Lance was straight. Now... Now it is almost worse. Because if Keith asked him out and Lance said no, it would've been fine because Lance wasn't even attracted to guys. It wouldn't have been personal. But now...

"Hunk, thank you for telling me... But I need to go", Keith gritted out while he felt tears prick the corners of his eyes. Hunk almost took a hold of Keith before he ran away, so Hunk was left calling after him.

Keith ran. And ran and ran and ran. He couldn't stand being in that room anymore, not while his eyes could still catch Lance's, not while Lance flirted with other people, not while Keith knew. Keith managed to find a small guest bathroom a few halls down and hid himself inside.

His tears never came, they were close, and he felt in pain in his chest and stomach, but no vomit, coughs, or tears ever graced the outside world. Keith just wanted to leave. He wanted so many things right now. Things he has wanted since he left Voltron. He wanted to curl up on a couch and watch movies with Hunk, Pidge, Shiro, Allura, Coran, and Lance. He wanted to cry out all his dammed in tears just so he could feel relief. He wanted to eat some of Hunks food, his almost best friend. He wanted to hug Shiro, his almost brother. He wanted to listen to Pidge rant, his almost little sister. He wanted to hear a story about Altea from the alteans, his almost uncle and older sister. But most importantly, he wanted Lance. He wanted Lance, dare he say, his almost lover.

He wanted to tell Lance everything, how he felt, what he wanted, where he would like to go, and who he would like to go with. He wanted to hold Lance in his arms and never let him go, just to make sure harm never goes his way. Keith wanted to lay in bed with him and be tangled him mess of limbs and loose blankets. Keith wanted to get all the love his had in his heart and hand it over to Lance. Keith wanted that more than anything. He wanted Lance, but the thought of never having him kept Keith from going back outside.

While Keith now knew he had somewhat of a chance, the chance came at a higher risk. If Lance rejects him, it won't be because of sexuality, it will be because Lance doesn't like him personally.

And that, in Keith's opinion, is way, way worse than having no chance.

Keith didn't come out of the bathroom for a while. But when he finally did, he decided that he should leave and just go back to the base. He felt shitty and didn't want to be there anymore for any reason.

Before Keith could make it out of the front entrance, he heard his name be called and quickly turned around.

Lance was making a bolt for where Keith was standing and make bi attempt to slow down. By the time Keith could register what was happening, Lance's body was pressed tightly against his own and he felt himself go completely red.

"Hey bud! Where did you go? Hunk told me you left in a rush really upset about something. I thought you were already gone, but I came over here anyway just to see if you changed your mind. Anyway, are you okay?"

Lance's rambling was muffled by the panic and absolute bliss he was in. Keith knew he shouldn't have be as happy as he was just from a hug, but he was. He made an attempt to speak, but nothing came out. Instead, he wrapped his arms around Lance's torso and buried his face into Lance's shoulder, silently whimpering.

"Woah, Keith! Hey, look at me...", Lance says as he backs away and puts two fingers under Keith's chin, forcing him to look up. Lance's face was riddled with worry and seriousness, clearly on the verge of tears himself. Odd, Keith thought to himself. Lance continued, "... I don't know what happened, and I tired to ask Hunk about it, but he said it was something I would have to ask you about. So... Now im asking. What happened? Did someone hurt you?".

Keith was silent as he held back his tears.

"Keith... Is that a yes?"

"I mean... I guess so..."

Lance immediately looked pissed, "Who?! I'll fight them if need be! Just tell me when and where and show them that-!"

"Lance- wait no! Its not... It's somebody you know, but I can't say why or how they hurt me. Listen, it was... Indirect, so it's not like they even know." Keith was about to step away when Lance grabbed his hand, and looked down at his feet.

They were both silent for what felt like eons. They could hear the music muffled by the walls of the Castle, along with slightest scattered mummers of the people inside. Keith all of a sudden put all of his focus on Lance's hand. It was warm while he loosely held Keith's fingers, and his hand was... Almost shaking, like it was scared of something.

"Keith... Im going to need you to be honest with me, okay?"

Keith looked down, and nodded lightly.

Lance looked at their hands, and decided to bring up his other hand so that both of his hands were holding one of Keith's.

"Was... it me?", Lance asked in a voice so small only Keith could hear it.

Keith didn't know how to answer, a part of him wanted to reject that statement immediately and tell him that it wasn't his fault. But... In a sick, twisted way, it was Lance who hurt him. The thought of rejection clouded Keith mind so badly that he just accepted it as reality. Rejection became Keith's reality without him ever actually taking a chance. It hurt, a lot, and there was not much he could do about it.

"Keith?" Lance says, slowly looking up to meet Keith's eyes. Keith started, and god he could stare for hours if he could, but he can't. Keith slips his hand out of Lance's, and manages to pull a sad smile on his face.

"Yes and no. The thought of you hurts, but only because I made it hurt," Keith turned slightly, facing the front entrance and started to walk slowly, "Im sorry Lance... You deserve better than me. I need to leave. It was nice se-" before Keith could finish, he turned to see Lance's face had tear streaks painted onto his freckles. Keith instantly panicked.

"I-I didn't know you-you h-hated me that much. Im sorry... I should have known. I'm sorry for whatever I-I did to make you h-hate me so-", Lance broke off into more of a light sob, and started to fall onto his knees.

Keith fucked up, he knows he did, he has to fix it, but how can he tell Lance that he-

Keith needed to stop being selfish.

Before Lance could fall over, Keith ran towards him and caught Lance in his arms. Lance sobbed softly and started hiccuping, "I-Im sorry, I wanted to help but I ended up being the problem! I-Im s-so sorry!"

Keith felt his heart break into pieces, everything that he promised to Lance in his mind felt broken and like a lie. He had to say something, anything, just to prove to Lance that he didn't hate him.

"I love you!"

Well... He guessed that was something. But it was the wrong something. Lance's sobs stopped to heavy breaths as he met Keith eye to eye. This is it... This is where I fucked up! Keith lectured to himself. He didn't need to tell Lance, he wanted to tell him, but he knew the consequences. He wanted to run and hide, but he was currently sitting on the floor with the boy of his heart half draped over his lap. It was kinda hard to move.

Lance stared at him, saying nothing and unmoving. Even though Keith was panicking at the moment, he couldn’t stop his mouth moving and started spewing words against his will.

“I don’t hate you Lance, I never did and I never will. Sure you annoyed me at first but that was then and this is now. Lance... you were there for me when those who should have weren’t. When Shiro disappeared, again, I thought no one would be on my side or support me, I thought he was the only one who had my back. I was about to, not only give up, but not even consider taking up a position as the leader. But then... you not only believed in me and made me see reason, but you also showed that you and the rest of the team have my back.

“After that, I couldn’t stop thinking about you. Thinking about how you make me feel and what you do for me, I was falling for you...”, Keith stopped to take a breath, he looked at Lance’s expression to see if any features of disgust had arrived, but surprisingly, they haven’t.

Keith realized he went too far... He just told Lance that he was in love with him and now he is going to hate him and never talk to him again or- "And... What about now?", Lance asked, disturbing Keith's train of thought.

"What?", Keith asked, his voice wavering.

"You said you were, falling for me... How do you feel now?"

Keith was hesitant, but he didn't want to deprive Lance of an answer. Keith's heart was telling him to just get up and run away, his body shook in anticipation of what the next few minutes could mean for his and Lance’s relationship. He wanted to dig a hole into the floor beneath him and bury himself alive, his heart was fighting against his chest.

Keith’s heart was about to implode when he decided to once again look at Lance. And at that moment, he realized something. He stared into Lance’s blue eyes and saw a sense of hope swim in his irises. Lance stayed close to his body, only a few inches of room between them and if they were to move any closer there would be no room to breath. Lance’s hair looked almost messy, probably from when he collapsed on the floor. He had a look on his face that was... so soft and free looking. No tension, no fear, nothing that indicated that Lance would hate him.

Keith, in that moment realized, that no matter what answer he would give, Lance would never hate him for it. Maybe things would get awkward, maybe there would be some tension; but no matter what, Lance would still love him as, at the very least, a friend.

Keith took a deep breath, and looked at Lance while smiling softly, noticing the dust of pink on his cheeks, and spoke only a few words.

“I still am”

THAT’S RIGHT BITCH!!!! MAKE UP YOUR OWN ENDING!! MAKE A FLUFF, MAKE ANGST, DO WHAT EVER YOU WANT!!!!

[kitsunebellproductions]

Thoughts on Voltron Season 7

SPOILERS, OBVIOUSLY! Things that annoyed/angered/saddened/frustrated me: *Kuron still being treated as though he was nothing more than some evil monster and convenient spare parts for Shiro. I am still nauseated by the whole thing. This poor precious baby boy deserved so much better. *Shiro’s hair -I mean come on, his fringe was pure white before but now it’s grey? What, did the whole process leach colour from the rest of his hair yet restore some to his fringe?! I will just assume it’s meant to be white but they felt this particular shade of white/grey worked best aesthetically with his outfits etc. *Too little Shiro for too many episodes. *Too much Keef. (Sorry, fandom has completely ruined this character for me, he’s not a bad character but I am repulsed by his mere name thanks to the toxicity in this fandom. I wish I could go back to the beginning of watching Voltron when he was just another decent character that I felt neither yay nor nay about, but it is what it is.) *That weird game show -if it was some magical space mage mumbo jumbo thingy that just transported their consciousness, why wasn’t Shiro there? And the whole ‘comedy family’ shtick with the Galra... I mean, it was a bit funny but... mostly weird tbh. The funniest parts were the commercials. *Way too little background/interaction with Shiro and Adam. *Also Adam’s design -like, why do you make an entirely new character that looks a lot like a mix of two other characters who are father and son (Matt and Sam)? You could have done literally anything to his design but you went safe and way too familiar? I mean holy moly did you see Kinkade? Fuck yeah what a gorgeous design, that is exactly what my hopeful heart pictured for Shiro’s boyfriend but nope. Give us generic floppy-hair glasses boy with a generic medium brown palette, it’s so fresh and new and interesting. Not. *Adam FUCKING DYING before Shiro even got back to Earth. You could have at least let the poor boy have a reunion with someone waiting for him on Earth before burying some more gays, but no. He must suffer. *Shiro getting like three seconds to mourn Adam. 

*Speaking of burying your gays... (not to mention a delightful dash of the ‘evil lesbians’ trope): Ezor and Zethrid. Yayy on their relationship, nay on them being presumably killed off (I mean killing 3 out of 4 queer characters while keeping the straight characters safe is not a good way to show how queer friendly your show is. And no the ‘we had to show how dark and dangerous war is’ excuse doesn’t work when the only characters you kill are the queer ones. There were plenty of characters back on Earth we’d have felt just as deeply about -or more even- considering we’ve heard about the other paladins’ families back on Earth but we’d never heard of Adam until now. Just imagine if Veronica had died -that would have been intensely emotional and really had gone to show all that you wanted about the dangers of war -especially as I don’t doubt for a second that Lance would have gotten an entire episode at least to mourn her while Shiro got like three seconds. Because Shiro is apparently not allowed to mourn). *And isn’t it funny how the most alien-looking Galra women are the evil ones, while the ‘good’ ones look more or less like lavender-skinned human women (and are also very pretty, petite and with slender, ‘sexy’ bodies.) Like, seriously... *Not to mention how creepy it is that Keef’s Galra mom and the other ‘good’ Galra woman (Acxa, who for whatever reason the show tried to force some out-of-the-blue yucky heteromance together with Keef) look disturbingly much alike (and they look to be the same age too more or less. So sick and tired of the ‘hot young-looking mom’ trope in media but especially animated shows. And especially when the kids end up banging girls looking to be more or less the same age as their mom). *Shiro not reacting when Ezor and Zethrid went for Pidge -he’s consistently been shown to be very protective and self-sacrificing, yet here he barely bats an eye. I get it was a scene framed to lift Lance, but it felt extremely ooc for Shiro to not at least try to help. *Ezor and Zethrid’s relationship being honestly way more explicitly stated than Shiro and Adam’s (which was the relationship hailed as the big lgbtq+ rep for this season). No, they definitely didn’t need to get back together for Shiro to still be considered lgbtq+ rep -you don’t need a partner to be lgbtq+! But when you wave a specific relationship around as a big banner of glorious lgbtq+ rep to come and then barely even hint at it in the show... well... not so much of a rep then, is it? *Not showing Shiro in that worldwide message of ‘these are our beloved brave heroes from Earth’. Like, this boy was kidnapped by aliens, spent a year being tortured, brainwashed, cloned, dismembered, pretty much violated in every concievable way, then immediately after escaping (with a shitload of PTSD in the baggage) he was sent back out into space and chosen to lead some war against seemingly impossible odds, a war that really wasn’t his war to fight, a war he still fought bravely and selflessly despite his physical and mental issues, a war he died in, but meh I guess he wasn’t worthy of mention. (And I don’t know why Keef wasn’t mentioned either, but maybe being half Galra makes you too much alien to be considered part of the world you were born and grew up in *heavy sarcasm*). *Shiro’s bond with the Black Lion and his role as the Black Paladin being pretty much erased/retconned -it’s like Keef gets to sit his ass comfortably down in the seat Shiro shed blood sweat and tears for and struggled so hard for, easily just gliding along on what Shiro has paved the road for but without acknowledging the huge role Shiro had in it all. Shiro was the one who brought out the wings for Keef in the end of the last season because Keef was unable to do it himself, because Keef had never bonded with her the way Shiro did -Shiro and the Black Lion found and saved each other in so many ways, and the Black Lion loved Shiro so much she saved his ‘essence’ inside herself, yet now we’re supposed to just accept that Shiro is old news and no longer worthy of being considered part of the ‘mighty Paladins of Voltron’. Myeah, did not like the feeling I got of this saturating this entire season. Keef can still be a big hero -or even your new main character- without grinding Shiro down into the dirt on the way. *That arm... it’s so big and clumsy-looking it makes him look weirdly lopsided. The comically large arm works for Sendak, considering his ‘evil sadist who loves crushing people with his alien prosthetic’ shtick, but for Shiro it just looks too big to be practical. If it was intentionally meant to imply that Allura just grabbed a prosthetic modelled after someone bigger than Shiro and remade it, and that’s why it’s so big on Shiro, that’s fine. But it feels impractical for anything other than fighting evil alien generals. *Shiro not getting to fulfil his arc as the abused victim and underdog by overcoming and defeating the evils pushing him down, but instead being forced to take the backset to a character forced into a leadership role for what seems like nothing more than a desperate clinging to nostalgia. It is mindboggling that everything Shiro has worked so incredibly hard for, everything he’s struggled and fought for is being taken from him and he’s supposed to be satisfied with a consolation prize. Yeah, Shiro going full Magical Girl Princess was amazing but he didn’t even get to deliver the final blow in any fight -not even his personal fight with Sendak- because apparently Shiro is not allowed any victories at all. *The whole sense of Shiro being punished for choosing his life’s dream over becoming the obedient house wife of his ex -he had only a short few years left to fulfil his dreams, and yet he’s painted as the bad guy for ‘abandoning’ his boyfriend (who was the one that left Shiro, actually). Yes, Adam had the right to choose to not want to separate for so long -during what was likely the last few years Shiro had enough mobility to do all the fun things couples dream of doing together- he had the right to say ‘I’m sorry but I can’t put my life on hold, and I wasn’t really prepared to go straight to caring for someone with a debilitating disease without a few more years of fun in between, I want to break up’. That still doesn’t make Shiro’s choice to follow his dreams any less valid than Adam’s choice to not wait for him. I bet Adam had an exciting bucket list waiting to start ticking off as a consolation when Shiro was denied the role of pilot for the Kerberos mission -I doubt he’d expected Shiro to actually be allowed to go and that probably seriously stumped him- but it’s incredibly cruel and selfish (and ableist) to expect a person to sacrifice their last few years of being able to fulfil their dreams just so their able-bodied partner can fulfil their small dreams and wishes of things they want to do for the last few of that person’s fully mobile years. And yet everything about Shiro’s arc paints a very very grim and ableist story of ‘you chose your own dreams over bending to your partner’s will, now let us show you what a horrible decision that was by torturing you relentlessly throughout the rest of this series without ever letting up. You will never be allowed happiness again because this is your punishment.’ I agree with other people that the way Shiro’s been treated throughout this series -constantly tormented without ever getting a single break or getting a real chance to fight and overcome his demons- seems way too much like torture porn. *The feeling that Shiro’s Magical Girl Moment was only there to blind us to the fact that him being probably the only one able to transform the Atlas means he’ll be conveniently grounded next season, forced to stay on Earth to ‘protect his home’ while the rest of them get to go off being the ‘amazing Defenders of the Universe’, leaving both Shiro and his legacy behind, unsung. I hope I’m wrong, but I get an overwhelming feeling that Shiro is being pushed into the background because they never intended for him to be the hero of the series but by the time they realised that’s exactly what they’d created with him it was too late to take it back, so now they’re trying their hardest to push him back into some mentor/backseat role in a sneaky enough way that they hope people won’t notice because they’ll be dazzled by the shine of his ‘new role’. ... Things that made me happy/excited/pleased: *The animation level. I mean holy mamacita Shiro is so beautiful he glows in like every single frame. *HUNK. Love this big gentle boy and love that he got to show more of who he is and what he has to give this season. *Seeing the families we’ve heard so much of. Seeing them reunited. Seeing flashbacks to happier times with the families. *Pidge finally getting her entire family back together. *The designs of all the alien/Earth tech. Gorgeous. *The design of some of the new characters <3 *So many new Galra characters with faces and personalities even if we only saw them for a few seconds. *All the ‘Earth preparing for alien invasion’ scenes/episodes. *Finally getting to know more about Iverson and who he is as a person. *Sam and Colleen. *Shiro being the new Princess of the new Castle ship. *Shiro fucking transcending being the Princess and transforming the entire Castle ship Atlas into a new Voltron type battle robot. *The Atlas being this beefy paladin type knight on top but t h i c c femme legs on tippy toes/high heels on the bottom. 10/10 what a beauty. *White Lion Shiro... I mean, I’m certainly not the only one thinking it, right? *Just Shiro. Wow. What a strong, beautiful, good person who cares about everybody else above himself. Someone give this poor traumatised boy hero a fucking vacation with the softest bed surrounded by therapy animals. Perfect cinnamonroll too pure for this world. *Shiro fighting Sendak hand-to-hand on top of a fucking space ship free-falling (read: CRASHING) to Earth instead of trying to escape I mean this boy *Keef fucking anime-slicing Sendak in twaine for daring to try to hurt the person he loves like a brother (bloodless and nice for the young’uns of course, but still). *Hunk carrying Shiro. *@ anyone claiming Lance ‘never gets screentime or development’ -fuck you. Look at this brave, strong boy who started out as a self-centered antagonistic jerk yet has grown into such a good and mature person. I may loathe the Lance I see portrayed in the fandom, but in the show he’s still such a good character. *Coran, Coran, the gorgeous man <3 *The mice and Kosmo the space wolf for MVP *Kaltenecker, most chill character in the entire universe. *Shiro’s prosthetic not being attached -at first I was like ‘noooo’, but then I realised... fuck yeah this is exactly what people in fandom need to stop erasing disabled characters. It is way too common for people in fandoms to claim that a person having any kind of high-tech or magical prosthetic that makes their disability less visible (For example Edward Elric from Fullmetal Alchemist) isn’t actually disabled at all ‘because it’s like they have normal limbs’. Having a prosthetic arm that has a big void between itself and the shoulder attachment makes it impossible to ignore the fact that Shiro is missing a whole arm. (And maybe, just maybe, people will finally stop with the shitty ‘he’s got a full sleeve of tattoos instead of a missing arm in this AU fanfic because erasing disabilities is super cool’ trope.) *The entire Shiro/Atlas transformation scene -ugh so beautiful <3 ... Phew, that got long! (=A=;;) I’ve probably forgotten a lot of things -but it’s been a few days since I watched it so it isn’t as fresh in my mind as I’d have liked, however I don’t have the time to rewatch it right now to refresh my memory so it’ll have to do. These are just my personal thoughts -things I found negative might be things someone else found positive, and things I found positive might be things someone else found negative. This isn’t meant to be a debate or attack -just a way for me to put my thoughts down and remember them for the future. And one last thing -please remember to be kind to each other -and don’t go attacking cast or crew -most of them have no real say in what happens on the show anyway, and harrassing and threatening castmembers to the point where they’re scared to even show up at cons is not the way to make the higher-ups listen to your complaints -however legitimate they might be. Now I guess we’ll just have to brace ourselves for season 8...

[creepywonderland-pony]

Tag Game

Rules: Answer questions given to you, write 11 new questions, and tag people to answer those questions!

Reglas: ¡Contesta las preguntas que se te den, escribe 11 nuevas preguntas y etiqueta a otros para que respondan esas preguntas!

I was tagged by @real-life-sucks-ass (thanks!)

I’m answering this in two languages so I can tag more people c: / Lo responderé en dos lenguajes, así puedo etiquetar a más gente c:

1) What would an evil version of you look like? Describe it or draw it. / ¿Cómo luciría una versión malvada de tí? Descríbela o dibujala

I am my own evil version. Lmao kidding. Oh boi, it took me a lot of time to get this one! I think my evil version would be as extra as me, therefore she would dress in all black and have really showy makeup (unlike me), and will be very very rude and conceited.  Lowkey I want her to have a cool hairstyle, but ceteris paribus, my hair is so straight that she would probably be trapped in the same I-cant-do-anything-with-this-hair hell.

Soy mi propia versión malvada. Lol, broma. ¡Me tomó mucho tiempo pensar en esta pregunta! Creo que mi versión malvada sería tan extra como yo, por lo tanto, se vestiría completamente de negro y tendría un maquillaje muy vistoso (a diferencia de mí), y sería muy grosera y engreída. A medias quiero que tenga un peinado genial, pero ceteris paribus, mi cabello es tan liso que probablemente quede atrapada en el mismo infierno de no-puedo-hacer-nada-con-este-cabello.

2) Share your knowledge! Teach us something weird you know :D/ Comparte tu conocimiento! Cuentanos algo extraño que sepas :D

I’m not quite sure of how unknown this fact is, but it will always shock me that the first biological weapons were corpses contaminated with the black plague catapulted into walled cities. And just to be sure I can surprise you, I’m going to tell ya that plesiosaurus and pterosaurs weren’t dinosaurs, in fact, all dinosaurs lived on the land. These species are classified due to the differences in its anatomy (especially bone structure) as big flying/swimming reptiles.

No estoy segura de cuán desconocido es este hecho, pero siempre me sorprenderá que las primeras armas biológicas fueran cadáveres contaminados con la plaga negra catapultada a las ciudades amuralladas. Y solo para asegurarme de que pueda sorprenderte, voy a decirte que los plesiosaurios y pterosaurios no eran dinosaurios, de hecho, todos los dinosaurios vivieron en la tierra. Estas especies se clasifican debido a las diferencias en su anatomía (especialmente la estructura ósea) como grandes reptiles voladores/nadadores.

3) You find a way to stop the time, as long as you want, as many times as you want. Only you can move, everything else is frozen. While it’s frozen, you don’t age. How do you use that power? / Encuentras la forma de detener el tiempo, por tanto como desees y tantas veces como lo desees. Solo tú puedes moverte, todos lo demás están congelados. Mientras [el tiempo] está congelado, no envejeces. ¿Cómo usas ese poder?

As I’m the most boring human being on this planet and also because I’m always stressed with college or wanting to write or watch a show, or paint, etc; I would probably just sit down and do as many things as possible. It would be very helpful tbh. I would also enjoy some time on my own, and maybe i would also be a little robin hood and take a few things from large commercial chains to give them to the poor. Yeah, mostly those kind of things.

Como soy el ser humano más aburrido de este planeta y también porque siempre estoy estresada con la universida,d o con ganas de escribir, o ver una serie, o pintar, etc; probablemente me sentaría a hacer tantas cosas como fuera posible. Sería muy útil tbh. También disfrutaría algo de tiempo por mi cuenta, y tal vez también sería un pequeño robin hood y tomaría algunas cosas de las grandes cadenas comerciales para entregárselas a los pobres. Sí, como ese tipo de cosas.

4) Can you cook? If so, please share a recipe with us? / ¿Puedes cocinar? Si es así, por favor comparte una receta con nosotros

I can certainly prepare a really good white rice and some pasta and salad lmao. Mmm sweet things are my speciality tbh, but I never learn the recipes from memory so… sorry.

Ciertamente puedo preparar un arroz blanco muy bueno y un poco de pasta y ensalada. Mmm cosas dulces son mi especialidad tbh, pero nunca me aprendo las recetas de la memoria así que … perdón.

5) If your life was a book, what would the first lines be like? (It can be a serious biography, a funny light book, poetry, drama, romance, or even a comics of child’s book, whatever you want!) / Si tu vida fuera un libro, ¿cómo serían las primeras líneas? (Puede ser una biografía seria, un libro divertido, poesía, drama, romance, o incluso un cómic de un libro infantil, ¡lo que quieras!)

“No one would have thought that Constanza was worthy to be a heroine, for her life is so boring that this book will make you sleep” Pfff, this is a hard one. I would probably like to have a really smart and sarcastic context, as Jane Austen always wrote; but in the case I’m blessed with being part of a fantasy book I want it to start with a fight or super badass escape.

“Nadie hubiera pensado que Constanza era digna de ser una heroína, porque su vida es tan aburrida que este libro te hará dormir” Pff, esta está dificil. Probablemente me gustaría tener un contexto muy inteligente y sarcástico, como Jane Austen siempre escribió; pero en el caso de que sea tan afortunada como para ser parte de un libro de fantasía, quiero que comience con una pelea o un escape súper rudo.

6) How’s your day so far? / ¿Cómo ha sido tu día hasta ahora?

Pretty calm, I woke up late, eat my breakfast and spend some time on my social media. I also got a comment on a fic so I’m happy c:

Muy tranquilo, me levanté tarde, desayuné y pasé un tiempo en mis redes sociales. También recibí un comentario sobre un fic así que estoy feliz

7) How many languages can you speak?

I can speak Spanish (native), English (quite fluently, but I mumble some words, working on that tho), and I started learning French (but I can only say really simple stuff).

Puedo hablar español (nativo), inglés (bastante fluidamente, pero farbullo algunas palabras, estoy trabajando en eso de todas formas), y comencé a aprender francés (pero solo puedo decir cosas realmente simples).

8) Rec us one or two good fanfics you’ve read recently! / ¡Recomiéndanos uno o dos buenos fanfics que has leído recientemente!

Ok, so. These are going to be different answers for obvious reasons. Lately I have not read so much in English and I do not know if we will coincide in fandoms but:

Rose Tinted by darkbrokenreaper is a Killing Stalking fanfic that i really like because it doesn’t romantice the uhealthy relationship between the characters, it characterizes them very well (which is especially laudable in my opinion, especially considering that there are some whose minds we still can not totally understand), the plot is really good and over all is really really well written. As a summary: Bum has amnesia and Sangwoo, after realizing that he has fallen in love, takes advantage of it pretending that they are married; from there it develops everything that Bum lives from waking until he realizes that something strange is happening, and seeks to escape.

Another fic that i liked is from Yuri on Ice, On My Love. It is so well written and full of feelings that i cant even think clearly. Just read it please, the plot is so iteresting and i literally cried twice. As a summary:Yuuri has an accident and wakes up young again, in a world where he does not know Victor (his beloved husband) and dode has not yet made a career in figure skating. Many feelings.

I actually need to catch up with both fic yet oops 

Ok. Estas van a ser respuestas diferentes por razones obvias. Últimamente he leído mucho de latin hetalia so:

Arranquemos del invierno de rantingprince me gustó mucho. Lo estaba leyendo en clases y me sentí embargada por sentimientos de nostalgia y a la vez una enorme calidad en mi pecho. Si alguna vez le ha leido dabrán que redacta muy bien y su estilo fluye y te hace flotar. Muy recomendado, no tiene un gran plot pero sí mucho sentimiento.

Seguimos dando Vueltas de Iris también muy recomendado, me la sufrí toda leyendo (ppor Martín y por Manu y por todo), pero fue tan lindo al mismo tiempo como todas las heridas fueron sanando y ambos encontraron en el otro lo que necesitaban. Claro que para entender van a tener que leerse La Mansión Prado primero, pero tbh ambos son tan tan buenos que me lo van a terminar agradeciendo.

Y ya que estoy en esto, hay versiones traducidas al español de On My Love de Yuuri on Ice, que no sé cuán buenas sean. Pero si lograron captar la mitad de la belleza de ese fic, entonces deben leerlo. En serio.

9) What do your family members and/or partner think about you being into fandoms (and writing fics or drawing fanarts if you do so)? Are they supportive? / ¿Qué piensan los miembros de tu familia y/o pareja de que estes en fandoms (y escribiendo fics o dibujando fanarts, si lo haces)? ¿Te apoyan?

My family doesn’t even now what a fandom is and they don’t know that I write fics, neither I want to tell them. I’m not sure, but they probably would not be very supportive (not for the writing part but for writing about gay otps). Also, I’m single af lol.

Mi familia ni siquiera sabe qué es un fandom y no saben que yo escribo fics, ni tampoco quiero contarles. No estoy segura, pero probablemente no me brindarán mucho apoyo (no por la parte de escribir, sino porque escribo sobre gays). Y soy super soltera lol.

10) Your top 3 fav characters ever? / ¿Tus 3  personajes favoritos de la vida?

After a long time of reflection I have decided that my fave of all time is Fitz Chivalry Farseer from The Farseer Trilogy because he is so useless but at the same time he tries so hard, and I suffer so much each time I read him to the point that I already feel that he is a part of me now (but I’m always changing of mind tho, since The Fool is so bold and sarcastic, and every time he opens his mouth I can not stop smiling, it’s really hard to choose between these two).

My second is Merlin from BBC Merlin. He is such a cinammon roll and his smile is so beautiful and he always tries to hep people and also he is so sarcastic too. If I was not so emotionally engaged with Fitz after reading so many pages of him, Merlin would be my number one. And honestly he is my number one of all the tv shows I’ve seen. I love him.

Finally, I’m going to choose Wonder Woman both as my favorite female character and favorite superhero (I’m sorry spidey, you are my second tho, and I still love you). I literally cried on every single fight scene because I felt really empowered and after watching it I wanted to kick some asses tbh. To this day I still smile when I remember the movie. And she is so strong and smart and kind, it is impossible to not love her.

Ugh, I left so many of my faves outside. This was hard.

.

Después de un largo tiempo de reflexión, he decidido que mi favorito de todos los tiempos es Trapié Hidalgo Vatídico de la Trilogía de Vatídico porque es tan inútil, pero al mismo tiempo se esfuerza tanto, y yo sufro demasiado cada vez que lo leo, al punto que ya siento que él es parte de mí ahora (pero siempre estoy cambiando de opinión, porque Bufón es tan atrevido y sarcástico, y cada vez que abre la boca no puedo parar de sonreir, es realmente difícil elegir entre estos dos).

Mi segundo es Merlin de BBC Merlin. Es un cinammon roll, y su sonrisa es tan hermosa, y siempre trata de ayudar a la gente, y también es tan sarcástico. Si no estuviera tan emocionalmente comprometida con Fitz después de leer tantas páginas de él, Merlín sería mi número uno. Y, sinceramente, él es mi número uno de todos los programas de televisión que he visto. Me encanta.

Finalmente, voy a elegir a la Mujer Maravilla como mi personaje femenino favorito y superhéroe favorito (lo siento spidey, tú eres mi segundo de todos modos, y aún te amo). Literalmente lloré en cada escena de pelea porque me sentí realmente empoderada y después de verla quise patear algunos traseros tbh. Hasta el día de hoy todavía sonrío cuando recuerdo la película. Y ella es tan fuerte, inteligente y amable que es imposible no amarla.

Ugh, dejé a muchos de mis favoritos afuera. Esto fue dificil.

11) Tell us 3 fun facts about yourself / Cuéntanos 3 datos divertidos sobre ti

-I have a little mole under my right eye that I find cute / Tengo un pequeño lunar bajo mi ojo derecho que encuentro lindo.

-I’m really into women’s political issues and I want to work on that area / Realmente me interesan las cuestiones políticas de las mujeres y quiero trabajar en esa área.

-I used to be blonde, now I’m brunette / Solía ser rubia, ahora tengo el pelo castaño.

And now I’m tagging: @a-pair-of-iris, @leochamposa, @coloresfrios, @bluebirdinatree, @pico-sour, @lemonmilk1, @im-a-boat, @veektahr @mardeleste y @dinosauria–anacleta

To answer these questions / Para responder estas preguntas: 

1) What is your favorite song and why? (You can choose 2 if it is too hard to only pick one) / ¿Cuál es tu canción favorita y por qué? (Puede elegir 2 si es demasiado difícil elegir solo una)

2) If you had the ability to enter the universe of any story, which one would you choose and why? (You can choose anything: video games, books, comics, movies, etc) / Si tuvieras la capacidad de entrar al universo de alguna historia, ¿cuál elegirías y por qué? (Puedes escoger cualquier cosa: videojuegos, libros, comics, películas, etc)

3) Tell me, what are your top 3 favorite things about yourself / Dime, ¿cuáles son tus 3 cosas favoritas de ti?

4) If you could make a wish without any limits, what would it be? / Si pudieras pedir un deseo sin ningún límite, ¿cuál seria?

5) What would you do if the zombie apocalypse started right now? What is your plan? / ¿Qué harías si el apocalipsis zombie iniciara ahora mismo? ¿Cuál es tu plan?

6) What is your favorite historical time and why? / ¿Cuál es tu época histórica favorita y por qué?

7) What would be your ideal future life? / ¿Cuál sería tu vida futura ideal?

8) Your top 5 writers evers and why? (can be both books and fanfics) / ¿Tus 5 escritorxs favoritos de la vida, y por qué? (pueden ser tanto libros como fanfics)

9) Best 2017 memory? / ¿Mejor recuerdo de 2017?

10) Do you have any oc? If so, would you like to tell me a little bit about them? If not, tell me a little about your favorite character ever and why you like them! / ¿Tienes algún oc? Si es así, ¿te gustaría contarme un poco sobre ellos? Si no, cuéntame un poco sobre tu personaje favorito y por qué te gusta!

11) If you could be a magical creature, what would you choose to be and why? How would you look? / Si pudieras ser una criatura mágica, ¿cuál escogerías ser y por qué? ¿Cómo lucirías?

Por supuesto pueden decidir no hacerlo! No hay ninguna obligación (: Espero que se diviertan~