#yeah lotor is like a bad person but if he wasn’t!! hear me out!!

[hypfden]

My favorite rare pair ship

Do they have any romantic chemistry on the show!! None!! But I think they are the definition of doomed gay relationship. And for lesbian visibility week I bring you doomed yuri

Sobbing

[duhragonball]

Disinterpretation

I finally finished the Sarah Z video about “pro vs. anti”.   It’s pretty long, and I ended up watching it in chunks over several days, but I think it’s worth watching, especially if you’re sort of partially connected to online fandom, but not enough to be aware of all the lingo. 

As I expected, the whole thing was vague and confusing because the people involved in the conflict made it vague and confusing.   In theory, the full terms would be “pro-shipping” and “anti-shipping”, but it seems like it’s more about particular kinds of ships that could be considered controversial.  But that’s a slippery slope, and apparently the whole conflict mutated into both sides deciding that every hypothetical relationship between fictional characters is either equally valid or equally dangerous.  

Long story short, it’s just purity culture, which was what everyone on Tumblr was calling it around 2012.  But now, if you’re a sane person who genuinely asks: “Who gives a fuck about Voltron?”, these people will jump your ass and accuse you of being on the side of their enemies.  “Children have died over the importance of Lotor/Hagger!   Your callous indifference proves that you yourself must have murdered children!” 

I think what Sarah Z really hit upon in this video was that media consumption has become so ingrained in our culture that people feel like it has to go hand-in-hand with our morality.   That is, it’s not enough for me to watch Star Trek, I have to justify Star Trek as evidence that I’m a good person.  Maybe this is where the expression “guilty pleasure” comes from.   Conversely, it’s not enough for me to not watch Dr. Who, I have to somehow convince everyone that Dr. Who was invented by the devil.

I’m pretty sure the Reylo ship has a lot to do with this, since it’s kind of understood to be a dark, problematic concept, and fans either embrace its flaws or recoil in horror because of them.   Star Wars itself is a dumb story about space wizards, so people try to give the debate more weight by linking it to freedom of self expression and/or enabling real world harm.   Suddenly it’s not enough to just think two actors would look cute making out instead of fighting.   Now it’s this battlefield for the soul of civilization or something.

I grew up in the 80′s, when “concerned parents” and grifters would accuse the Smurfs and metal bands of promoting satanism and witchcraft.   I used to hear stories of teens going out into the woods in the middle of the night to do occult stuff, and all I could ever think about was: “Why would anyone bother wandering out in the woods in the middle of the night?”  Which is why “concerned parents” turned their attention to things that were closer to home, like Saturday morning cartoons.   It had nothing to do with the content; it was just about finding a safe, accessible target for their hysteria.   Some people want to go on a crusade without leaving the house, so they pick a fight with Papa Smurf instead of confronting the real evils in the world.  Even as a kid, I knew this was a con, because I’d watched the show for myself and knew it was too saccharine to be threat to anyone.

The pro/anti folks have tried to disguise this with a lot of terminology.   I wondered why they seemed to reluctant to use the full terms “pro-shipper” and “anti-shipper”, and it’s probably a couple of things.   First, the word “shipper” is basically an admission that this is pointless bullshit that doesn’t matter, and they’d like to avoid that connotation.   Second, they seem to have decided that this goes beyond shipping itself, into practically anything else they want it to involve.  It’s all part of the con, which is to make you believe that it’s “us vs. them”, and you can be part of “us” by curating specific attitudes about Steven Universe.

Seriously, “about Steven Universe” is such an incredible punchline.  You can make anything funnier by adding those three words to the end of a sentence.   “Do not interact if you blog about Steven Universe.”   “Hey, what’s up, YouTube, this is SSJ3RyokoLover69, and this is going to be kind of a serious video about Steven Universe.”   “Mrs. Johnson, the results of your biopsy are in, and I have some bad news about Steven Universe.”   It’s a fucking kids show.   “Oh no, all the characters look like the characters in all the other kids shows!”   Yeah, that’s because it’s a kids show.   Marvin looks like Garfield, this isn’t new.

The common denominator here seems to be that both sides try to wrap themselves in the flag of vulnerable groups: impressionable minors, trauma survivors, harassment victims, etc.   The “pros” want to protect those people so that they can feel free to explore weird subject matter on their own terms, and the “antis” want to protect the same people from being exposed to weird subject matter that they might not want to see.   It’s all about establishing a moral high ground.   Back in the day, it was called “sanctimony”. 

But people get roped into this, because at their core, people want approval, and this stupid conflict offers them a sense of community.  As long as you support the cause, whatever it may be, you’ll have this online friend network that appears to support anything you do.   But if you deviate from their norm, you’ll be cast out.    Does this sound familiar?

To use a more familiar example, I still sometimes find people clamoring about Gochi vs. Vegebul.   I’ve never understood this, because both ships were canon, and I never saw much direct evidence of a war between them, but people would still talk about how crazy the Vegebul shippers were, and how crazy the Gochi shippers were, and it was like some huge thing going on just over the hills.   It’s the same idea, since the idea that you could like both or neither never seems to occur to anyone involved.   I never gave a shit, because I used to see the same dumb agendas in the Harry Potter fandom.

Okay, so let me take you back.  It’s 2005 through 2011, and I’m hateblogging all seven Harry Potter novels, because fuck you, that’s why.  The funny thing I encountered was that occasionally fans seemed to want to pretend like my bashing of certain characters was proving them right somehow.    They were like “See?  He hates Ron Weasley too!  That proves that Seamus Finnegan is the coolest guy ever.”   The Slytherin stans would do this all the time, because I would constantly take the piss out of the Gryffindor characters for being self-important dopes.   I think they just liked hearing it from an outside perspective.   But I had to keep reminding them all that I hated all of them.   Every character from Harry Potter sucks ass. Voldemort was my favorite, but only because he was the one guy who wanted to kill all of the others.   But he sucks too because he failed. 

And the shippers were the same way.   I’d say something shitty about Ron, because Ron sucks, and some smartass Joss Whedon fan would be like “Yes!  Boost the signal!  That is why Harry/Hermione is the best ship!”  And I’d be like “No, Harry and Hermione suck at least as bad as Ron does.  They’re all terrible and I hate them.”   I really do think there was some sort of Stockholm Syndrome going on with Harry Potter books, where everyone secretly knows they suck, but the fans sort of latch on to one or two characters and go like “Well, he’s not as shitty as the rest.”   Like finding spaghetti in the trash and picking out the meatball with the least amount of lint on it.   Then you’d go and start a flamewar with some other starving person over whether your meatball is shittier than theirs.  This is what people mean when they say to read another book. 

Anyway, the big thing I picked up from Sarah Z’s video is “disinterpretation”, a term coined by MSNBC columnis Zeeshan Aleem.   The Twitter thread is worth a read, but the short version is that he once remarked that a Julia Louis-Dreyfus routine wasn’t very good, and someone got mad at him for insinuating that women are incapable of being funny.    They just took his dissatisfaction with one performance by one comedian as being a universal condemnation of women comedians in general.  And this sort of thing is all over the internet.   Everyone sees what they want to see and then they take it as permission to overreact.  

I ran into this myself a while back, because someone saw who I interacted with on Twitter and decided that they’re all bad guys and if I have any interaction with them, then that makes me a bad guy too.   At the time I tried to play it cool, but the more I think about it, the more it ticks me off.   And over the course of that conversation, it was said that I don’t talk about myself much, and that’s kind of funny, because all I ever do on social media is write long-ass blog posts like this one.  I don’t expect anyone to memorize them, or even read them all the way through, but when I write all this stuff and someone goes out of their way to say they don’t know anything about me, the message is that they just didn’t pay attention to what I was saying, and they didn’t bother to try.

So I’m a little jaded from that, because I got called out for a bunch of stuff I didn’t even do or say, and apparently that’s just a thing that happens.   People will reject you for completely arbitrary reasons, not because of anything you actually said or did, and you’re left thinking you made some terrible mistake.   Except, no, I’ve seen it happen to other people, people a lore more conscientious than I am, and if they can’t satisfy the bullshit purity standards, then I never stood a chance.   If the game is rigged so I can’t win, then I’m not going to play.  

And it’s that same condition that probably draws people into these online holy wars, because if you declare yourself for the pro or anti side, at least then you’ll have a posse backing you up.   Only they don’t support you, they support your willingness to support them.    Once your commitment to their agenda wavers, even in the slightest, they will turn against you.   

Sarah Z suggests that both sides of the war drop the pro and anti terms, since they lost all meaning long ago.   But that just invites a new set of useless terms to perpetuate the same cycle.   Her more useful advice is for fandom people to broaden their horizons.   She got a lot of flak for tweeting “Go outside” once, but the ironic thing is that it’s sound advice.   I had lunch with my mom yesterday and it was just nice getting away from things for a while.   People need to do that more often, and unfortunately it feels like it’s harder to do than ever before.

But “go outside” isn’t just a literal thing.   It can mean going beyond your usual haunts, reading the same books, watching the same shows, rehashing the same conversations.   I think the reason this stuff always revolves around “shipping” is because there seems to be this deep-seated compulsion to pair fictional characters off like this, and for a lot of folks it’s the only way they can consume a story, so they do.   And they do it lot, and there’s a lot of them, and they do it the same way every time, and lo and behold the same old conflicts start up.   So maybe “go outside” should mean “go outside of that cycle once in a while.”   Just a thought. 

[dammitadolfnomorecake]

Once Bitten, Twice Stupid prt 126

126

Lance knew he’d taken a turn for the worst as he shuddered on the cold stone floor. He’d thrown up so much that he knew he was definitely dehydrated and on the wrong side of hunger. His body felt lighter. Too light. And something in the darkness felt physically heavy to the point of suffocation. Groaning to himself, his eyes went wide as it came out as a squeak. His body moving as he found himself not as he should be. Tiny little legs and flapping wings were tangled in his shirt. He’d turned into a bat again... He’d let everyone down. He knew he’d been exhausted. He knew he’d had a fever. He knew Shiro was worried after their talk... and now he was showing how useless he was as he wasn’t even able to maintain his human form from how weak he felt.

Untangling himself from his shirt, a new realisation hit him as he surveyed how tiny he was compared to the space he was in. He was tiny. A quick check down showed he a chubby little belly... Right. This couldn’t be good for the twins. This shouldn’t even be possible unless... unless something had happened to them! He was starving. Their tiny masses of cells were foreign bodies... with foreign DNA in his system. Flapping his wings, he squeaked loudly. Spinning himself in a circle due to his lack of coordination. Why wasn’t anyone helping him? Was he losing Keith’s twins? He needed to switch back. Blinking at the darkness, he found himself alone in the cell. No Shiro. No Matt. No Curtis or Sam. Alone... They’d left him behind? When did they have the chance!? He didn’t want to be left behind! He wanted to go home to Keith and cuddle! He didn’t want to lose the twins! He didn’t! He’d been so careful. So careful that this wasn’t fair! He wanted his Mami and his boyfriend and cuddles... not... not Keith hating him for how weak he was!

*

Shooting up from his nightmare, Lance groaned as his body protested the sudden sitting upness. Thank fuck. Thank fuck he wasn’t a bat

“Lance?”

Taking a moment, Lance realised he was sitting with his back to Curtis now...

“Wha...”

“You fell asleep, so I moved you so your head was resting on my leg. You seemed to be having a nightmare”

Ugh. That was one way to put it. Stupid vivid dreams that had to stick in his head

“Yeah... it was... fucking awful. Don’t let me turn into a bat”

“That bad? Here, lay back. You feel slightly feverish”

“I thought I was... never mind... How long was I asleep?”

Even dreaming about losing the twins had shaken him up too much. Saying out loud would panic Shiro... Curtis was probably worrying too... He didn’t want to sink back against him, but Curtis needed the comfort

“A couple of hours. You haven’t missed anything happening other than Matt farting in his sleep”

“I’m glad I missed that. I swear there’s something dead in his intestinal tract”

“It was rather pungent. Much like being at home”

From their breathing Shiro, Matt, and Sam were sleeping. Curtis must be on guard shift. That was good. He preferred not seeming stupid in front of Sam, and not upsetting Matt

“I know this probably a silly thing to ask, but how are you doing?”

Settling himself to sit next to Curtis, Lance covered what he could of them with shiro’s jacket

“I’m not happy to be here”

“Yeah. Their hospitality sucks. I won’t be recommending this place to all my friends”

“I’m ashamed more than anything. They used a gas canister to take us out. Shiro tried to get us to the car, after Rieva was hit. He called Coran straight away, while I did nothing”

“Hey. You don’t need to be ashamed. At least you didn’t get kidnapped in front of VOLTRON”

“Yes. Well. I had hoped you’d be safe. Evidently not”

“I did try to make a recording... I opened up the app so I could record whatever Shiro said when you guys turned up... you know, as evidence or whatever. I don’t even know what happened to my phone”

“I’m sure Pidge would find it”

“Unless they’ve got it and turned it off. They could have even disposed of it on the way to throw the others off”

Being stuck here was thoroughly depressing. What a stupid notion. A vampire who didn’t want to lurk in the dark damps of an underground basement

“We can only hope the others work things out. You had some interesting ideas”

“My ideas only upset Matt. I know he’s worried about Rieva and can’t control himself right now, but like... I thought if we could combine forces we could bust out”

“The only problem with that is what’s waiting on the other side of those bars”

“Yeah, Shiro said that too. I’m worried about you guys, but I’m more worried about what this is doing to Keith... I feel like a bad friend”

“Keith is your soulmate. You have been through a lot together”

“And just when we think we’ve go a break, this goes and happens... I’m sorry. That nightmare fucked me right up”

“Want to tell me?”

“I was a bat. But like, I was panicking because I was a bat and I thought I was losing the twins... if I was a bat, I could get through the bars, then disable the power”

“We both know you’re not that coordinated”

Lance lightly jabbed Curtis in the side with his elbow

“I’ve had my moments of extreme coordination. Plus, I’m more coordinated without my glasses on”

“Barely. You’ll need blood soon”

“Don’t remind me. I never want to eat again as it is. It’s tiresome throwing up”

“The smell isn’t too pleasant”

“There’s that too. I almost miss the bag from over my head”

“I could get it...”

“Nope. I said almost. Do you really think they’ll leave us down here until I starve and vampire out?”

“I don’t think so. You’re a prime specimen. Having you out of control does them no favours”

“Unless they want to see how far they can push a breeder before having to feed them”

“Let’s not think about that. How are you feeling? Have your teeth grown back?”

“Yeah. My fangs grow back in pretty fast, not that the rest of them don’t”

“If you get hungry, let me or Shiro know... I don’t know what my blood will be like, but Shiro’s should be okay as he’s human”

He didn’t want to feed from Shiro. Nor did he want to feed from Sam. He didn’t know if feeding off Curtis was a smart idea, and Matt was out the question. Even when Keith force fed him, he didn’t want an audience to what he was... and with Keith, it was only because Keith was his boyfriend. It kind of felt like cheating if he fed off anyone else. Curtis didn’t want to hear that

“I’ll think about it. You should get some sleep. I doubt they’ll come for us anytime soon”

“I slept enough. It’s you who should be resting. We need you with as much energy as possible for whatever comes”

“If something does happen, promise you’ll get Sam and Shiro out. Matt... he’s a wolf, and I’m a vampire... but them... I can’t ask Shiro”

“We’ll all get out of this. You’ll see. We’re not leaving you behind”

*

“Keith! You’ve got to come now!”

Bursting into the briefing room, Allura startled Keith out of his self loathing flunk that not even the countless amount of coffee was helping. 24 hours with nothing. Rieva couldn’t help. They’d been gassed, all she really remembered was Shiro yelling and being shot, and had some very choice words to say about it all. It took everything had not to start screaming at her for the answers she didn’t have. Raising his aching head, Keith stared at Allura. She was too damn perky...

“What?”

“Shiro is back”

Pushing his chair back to fast it fell backwards, Keith was on his feet, a little too fast as he head throbbed. Everyone trying to talk at once

“Is dad...?”

“What about Lance?”

“Is Matt there? And Curtis?”

Allura shook her head

“Shiro, Sam, and Matt. They were left outside the bookshop unconscious”

What the hell? Where was Lance? Why was Lance not with Shiro? What the fuck did this mean? He’d felt so... he didn’t actually know the word for the relief at hearing Shiro was back, but now he felt weak at the knees seeing Lance wasn’t...

Allura turned from the room, all of them following after her, Keith the first. Shiro was back and it was finally time to find out what was going on.

Led down to VOLTRON’s infirmary, Coran had the three unconscious men laid out. Nursing staff busy around him

“Shiro!”

Going to rush to his brother’s side, Coran intercepted him

“I’m sorry, Keith. I need you to wait outside with the others”

“That’s my brother!”

“And at the moment we’re collecting their clothes and analysing what’s in their system. I know you want to be here, but we need space to work”

Shiro was right there. Right in front of him... now he was being sent away...

“Keith... It’s not like we don’t want to see Sam and Matt. Coran, thank you. We’ll wait outside”

Colleen agreeing with Coran meant Keith had no choice but to head outside with the others. She’d worked as hard as everyone else to understand what was happening, even with no leads to go on. Lotor had left, taking his generals. Allura doubting if she’d made the right call seeing he’d actually gone. With so many people in the room, Keith had found himself withdrawing more and more. He didn’t feel he had anything valuable to add. He’d watched everything at least a dozen times, only no magical leads had materialise and he’d burnt the image of Lance collapsing into his brain. Krolia had been a bigger help than he knew what to do with. She’d gone and picked up Kosmo, and now remained personally stationed with Rieva on the off chance something was to happen. If he wasn’t so hung up on Shiro finally returning, he might have thought to go tell Rieva that her boyfriend was back... Instead Pidge thought of that, her, Hunk, and Allura leaving him with Colleen to go let Rieva know.

Leaning against the wall for support, Keith kept his arms crossed and his head down as he waited for Coran to let him see Shiro. Curtis wasn’t with the others, Keith didn’t want to think the worst of his brother’s boyfriend, yet the fact he wasn’t with the others led to that little voice inside his head wondering if Curtis was the traitor. The guys who took Lance had said that Curtis confirmed the pregnant. He didn’t think Curtis had it in him to lie them, yet if they’d offered him a cure for his curse... He didn’t want to think that way, but why hadn’t he been returned with the others? Was it because he’d fused with a demon? He was the only person Keith had ever heard of to be cursed. If Curtis wasn’t the traitor then... then he and Lance could both be being tortured right now... Shiro could have been tortured. Just because he didn’t see obvious bruising didn’t mean there wasn’t any.

It’d pushed half an hour before Coran came out, the others assuming similar positions to his, only Pidge had her arms wrapped around her mother. Krolia hadn’t left her post. Kolivan had come up empty at the scene, but that didn’t mean he hadn’t spent most of the night scouring the area for clues. James and the wolf pack had nothing. Shiro had to be okay, or Keith might just lose it.

Letting himself relax, Coran smiled at the group of them

“You may go in now. They’ll be asleep for a few hours, but I know you’re desperate to see them. I’ll take the evidence we’ve collected for processing. Hopefully we’ll gain some clues as to where they’ve been held and if Lance was held with them. Before you panic, we’ve restrained Matt purely as a cautionary measure. He may... uh, as you would say, “wolf out”. Hit the red button on the wall when he wakes. I expect he won’t be under as long as Sam and Shiro”

Hunk wiped his hands on his shirt, marks left from the sweat. Almost timidly he asked Coran

“And... they’re okay? They...”

“They’ve been sedated. I would say gas was used as there is no sign of puncture marks. I’ll know more when I’ve examined their blood work. The three of them were dehydrated, I’ve set up IV fluids. I failed to find signs of bite marks, both Shiro and Sam are still human from the feeling of their quintessence and body temperature. Though, had they been changed the change would be obvious. For three men held by vampires, they’ve been exceptionally well looked after considering Matt is a werewolf and Shiro’s identity as a hunter. Right. Well, head on in. I’ll be expecting all of you to get some rest. This has been a very tiring 24 hours and until we learn more, you’re best of resting and recovering your strength”

Keith noticed the way Coran said nothing about Lance. No reassurances that because their three friends had been returned mostly safely that Lance would be found with the evidence on them or that they could expect him to be returned in the same condition. Heading into the room, he found himself stumbling the last few steps to Shiro’s side, grasping his bothers hand as he shook. Shiro was warm. He was warm and alive. He hadn’t expected him to be so warm when his brother was normally such a loud sleeper. Letting himself all but collapse against his brother, he laid his head on Shiro’s chest, listening to the strong sound of his beating heart. He’d come back to him. He’d come back to him when Keith feared he’d never see him again. But how was he back? Had even been taken by the same people who took Lance? Why would they return a hunter? What had they done to him? Was this sleep really drug induced? Or had there been some kind of incident where they’d tried escaping and Shiro had been hurt? He felt terrible for not caring for Matt and Sam as much as he did his brother. He did care about them. He did. He swore he did. He just... felt abandoned all over again. Like Shiro would never be home, or he’d come back but be like Adam. Half crazed and begging for his death.

Coming up behind Keith, Hunk wrapped an arm around his shoulder

“He’s going to be okay, man”

What did normal well adjust social people say to that?

“Thanks”

That didn’t sound quite right. Hunk sniffled

“I’m so glad they’re back”

The angry over caffeinated region of his brain wanted to slap Hunk away and yell at him because Lance wasn’t with them. The more tired part of him making impossible to get those words out

“Yeah”

It didn’t sound enthused. He should be more enthused. He was just too emotionally and physically drained

“You should get some rest. We’re going to stay until they all wake up, and no offence, man, but you look dead on your feet”

“I’m fine... I’m not leaving Shiro”

“Then at least take a nap next to him... or I can go find a chair?”

“Won’t that be weird?”

“Nah, man. He’s your brother. I’d be climbing into my brother’s bed too if he’d just come home from being kidnapped”

He wouldn’t sleep. He’d nap. Or better yet, he’d doze. That way he’d be semi awake when Matt woke up, seeing he really was the most likely to wake first.

[mydearestreaderfanfics]

Wake Me Up (Shiro x Reader)

Warnings: swearing, fake dating, reader has light anxiety

Word Count: 4,855

Prompt/Request: Shiro x femreader with the fake relationship trope?? bonus if they're childhood best friends and pining idiots

Summary: Reader has gotten herself into a bit of a pickle with a study group at school, thankfully a helpful Shiro agrees to pretend to date her to fix things. What happens when their feelings are more real than they want to pretend they are? Read and find out!

Author's Note: I don't usually write in 1st person, but I really wanted to try something new out. Readers, let me know if you liked it, please. Also, to the anon that requested this, I especially hope you like this and sorry it took so long. Bonus! If you want an enhanced reading experience go listen to the Ed Sheeran song by the same name.

Author: Mod Alex

I knew from the first time I met you that you're something absolutely spectacular. The second your family’s moving truck left, my mom was dragging me over, insistent on the fact that we needed to make the new neighbors feel welcome. I had seen you hiding behind your mom’s leg as our mothers talked. I had waved but that only seemed to make you shrink back more. You had looked so timid and scared back then, even more so when your mom told you to take me to the back so we could play. You had begrudgingly agreed, hiding behind a big oak tree. I followed unsurely. “Hey, are you okay?”

“L-mm-on.” You’d hidden your face in your knees, effectively muffling your voice.

“I’m sorry, I didn’t hear you.”

You peeked up. “Leave m’lone.”

I was taken aback but had sat down regardless. “I’m not mean y’ know. We could be friends?”

You hid her face again, but not enough to muffle your words. “Can you read?”

“Read? Um, mostly. I can’t read real big books. Oh, did you want me to read to you?” You nodded sheepishly and I grinned. “Cool! I’ll be right back, okay. You stay here.” I had run back to my house (which was right next door) and brought back my favorite storybook. “Huff… I’m back… huff… I wasn’t sure what kind of… huff… story you like, so I brought this.” I held the book out for you to see. You startled, but relaxed when you saw the book. A shy smile tugged at your lips and you nodded. So I read, and read, and read. I read until my voice began to fade away and the crickets began to sing. “Takashi, sweetie, are you out here?” In my voice that was fainter still, I bid you goodbye, before I could leave though you tugged me back to hug me briefly and ask if I still wanted to be friends. I, of course, agreed, which to this day, I believe was the best decision of my life.

I guess I must have won you over that day because you deemed me worthy of being your best friend. I was elated, of course. Sometimes we played pretend, other times we played hide and seek or tag. Sometimes we read right behind the great oak tree just like that very first day. It was the same way throughout the entire time we went to school. Sometimes, although I’d never tell you this, whenever I notice you’re having a rough day I’ll call and ask you if we can meet up under the oak tree in your backyard. I’ll read to you then, not because you can’t read (you can, beautifully if I do say so myself), but because it's tradition and because it makes you smile and goodness knows I’d do anything in the world to make you smile. Which is where we are now.

“Kashi?’ I pause, eyes leaving the page to look at you.

“Yes, (N/n)?”

Your eyes are closed, if it weren’t for the fact that you had just spoken I might have mistaken you for being asleep. It wouldn’t be the first time you'd have fallen into an easy slumber slumped against me in the shade of the mid-afternoon. “Do you think you could read me something a little different?”

“Of course!” The words left my mouth faster than I meant to let them, making me sound like an over-eager to please labrador, which I suppose when it came to you I absolutely was. You hummed happily, but the creases in your forehead indicated that something was off. “Anything in specific you’d like?”

You blinked your eyes open, sighing before picking yourself up off me to shuffle through your phone. “This?” I took the phone from you, containing my surprise from you. It wasn’t the first time you’d asked me to read you a romance, but I still couldn’t help the butterflies that would awaken in my stomach when you did. You resumed your spot leaning against me, closing your eyes again. Pushing back the urge to kiss your forehead, I began reading.

As I recited the meet-cute to you I couldn’t help but picture us; is that bad? That I can’t even read a simple story to you without picturing us as the ones sharing secrets, swapping longing glances and flirty remarks. It’s why I never choose romance novels. Because then Hazel melts away with the words into you, and suddenly it's not her telling Augustus the lines, but you telling me and I can’t handle it. I feel like I can literally hear your voice, soft and melodic reciting the lines; when I realize it’s not just my brain supplying a pining fueled fantasy, it really is you actually mumbling along with me "...As he read, I fell in love the way you fall asleep: slowly, and then all at once.” And even then it doesn’t slow my heart rate because why that line? The one line that makes sense in the situation we’re in. Do you have any idea what you’re doing to my heart?

We hadn’t even gotten halfway through when I heard you sniffle. My words faltered, resuming as I tried to steal glances at you. We had yet to even get to the sad part yet, so why? Eventually, I just gave up trying to theorize what might be wrong and stopped to gaze at you. Your wellbeing was my top priority after all. That’s the whole point of us sitting here, isn’t it? “(N/n), what’s wrong?” At this point, it was evident that you were crying. Your face was pressed into my arm, but I could still hear your sniffles. It broke my heart, to see you like this. Without a thought to be flustered over the intimate gesture, I cradled the side of your face, gently urging you to look up. “Hey, now, whatever’s troubling you, we’ll get through it.” You started to cry harder and I immediately felt the syrupy trickle of guilt through my veins. Had I said something wrong?

“It’s all my fault. I’m so stupid. Why do I always have to be such a fuckup, Kashi?” You wouldn’t meet my eyes, looking down pitifully. I wiped away a tear futilely.

“Hey, don’t talk about my best friend that way.” You giggled softly at that. “Really though, you aren’t a fuckup and as far as I’m concerned you’ve never done anything to deserve the berating you're giving yourself.” You sigh, leaning against my hand mumbling quietly.

“You’re sweet. But I really did fuck up this time.”

“What happened?”

“Do you remember when I told you about my group for my Fiction Writing class…”

“Yeah?” Of course, I remembered. Out of everybody in the group, you were the only one to take the assignments seriously, not to mention the guy you mentioned that kept hitting on you- Lotor was his name. I’m not a jealous person, but the thought of someone making you that uncomfortable for their own gain gets under my skin more than I’d like to admit.

“Well, um, it's just that they, um, they got it in their head that you and I, that we’re like, an, uh, an item? I-I was trying to tell them that we weren’t but they wouldn't let me get a word in, you know? Lotor said that that was the real reason I would have to reject his advances. And it was like they started kinda teasing me and I just didn’t know what to say anymore, so I told them that, uh, they could meet you… I’m sorry, you don’t have to, of course. I should’ve just tried harder to get them to listen to me. I should just, um, I can- I’ll just send Ezor a text. Word will definitely travel then...”

I frowned, listening as you continued to go further into your own head, curling in on yourself as you did. My heart twinged, was it so bad that I kind of wanted to play along? Wouldn’t it be a win-win anyway? The group you were in were not particularly nice people from what you'd told me and playing along with it would keep them from giving you shit, and well it didn’t hurt that I’d get to pretend to be your boyfriend… it might be the only chance I get. “What if… What if we just play along? I mean we already know everything about each other. It’d be easier than finding someone else or getting harassed every time you go to class. Anyways, it’s only until the end of the quarter.” And I was being sincere, regardless of my own personal interest, I would've done it for you. I’d do literally anything for you.

You stopped talking abruptly and looked at me with a look I couldn’t quite place. “You’d do that for me?”

I grinned. “Of course. It’d make it easier on you wouldn’t it?”

“I-I guess.” You bit your lip while you thought, a habit you’ve had since we were younger. “Yeah, okay... Yeah, this could work. Are you free Friday night?”

“Friday? What time, Matt and I have that conference.”

“Right, sorry I forgot. It’s, hmmm, let me check…” A beat of silence fell over us as you checked. “9:30?”

“9:30 is perfect.”

“Great! Okay, so the group is meeting up at the Lotor’s at 8, but the ‘study sesh’ doesn’t start till 9:30. Um, it’s really more of a party but Axca is bringing her notes, so I'd have to go either way. Also, I think they want to prove you are my boyfriend or whatever so…. Yeah.”

“I’ll pick you up at 7 and we can get something to eat before then. I have to take care of my girlfriend after all.” I was joking but saying it still made the butterflies stir up again.

You rolled your eyes and smiled. “Sure, sure. See you then, boyfriend.”

-

I’d gotten more dressed up than I may have needed to considering we were going to a college party, but I wrote it off on wanting to look good for the act we were about to put on, after all, it had to be believable right? And well it wasn’ too dressy, just nice. I didn’t look nearly as good as you, of course. When I picked you up, I’d nearly stumbled over my words. I felt like a teenager again, picking up my date for prom. You laughed when I offered you my arm, taking it anyway even though we didn’t have to put on the act just yet. “You like nice, are you ready to go?”

“As ready as I'll ever be," You fiddled with your jacket as you smiled shyly at me, "and thanks, you look good too."

My skin buzzed with a pleasant electricity at the compliment. “Thank you. Well hey, look at the bright side at the least we go eat now. I'm starving, the conference didn't break for lunch thanks to Matt.”

You laughed and I couldn’t help the smile that tugged at my lips, you looked so beautiful and carefree. “Alright, Mr. Matt-Didn’t-Feed-Me, where are we gonna eat at?”

“I was thinking Rover’s?”

We had started walking to my car, at least we were until you stopped in your tracks. “Rover’s? Isn’t that place kind of on the up-and-up?”

“Sure it is.”

“Won’t that be… kinda pricey. Shiro, I don’t think I can- I’ve got textbooks and supplies I still have to get for next quarter.”

I waved my hand, turning to grin at you. “I don’t remember saying I was going to make you pay.”

You huffed looking somewhere between uncomfortable and flustered. “I’m not letting you dump a ton of money on me.”

“Hey, look, I just got a bonus, alright. Let me take us out to dinner. We’re always talking about how we want to go there, so let’s just do it. I promise you there is nothing I want to spend my money on more.”

You grumbled, and before I knew it you had yanked me into a hug. “You are way too good to me.”

I let myself chuckle as I wrapped my arms around you in return. “No way, you deserve it.”

-

At Rover’s we had to park a little ways away. “Hi, we have a reservation for 8.”

The host smiled pleasantly looking at the screen in front of them. “Shirogane?” I nodded. “ Right this way.”

“You tricked me!” You whisper yelled at me as we followed the host.

“I did no such thing.”

“You didn’t tell me you already reserved a spot here.”

“It’s the only way to get in. Although I will say, I’m glad you agreed before we got here.”

You gently socked my arm and I acted hurt, sticking my tongue out playfully. “You ass.” Your broad grin betrayed your words, showing just how excited you were to be here.

"Name-calling, that’s not nice, (N/n). And to think I brought you here-”

“Oh my god, shut up you nerd.”

“Your table.” The host had stopped, watching the both of us with an amused expression. He was older, nearing his late fifties surely. “I remember when my husband and I were your age. We were just like you.”

I laughed, somewhere between disbelief and absolute delight. “Thank you, sir.” I heard you splutter, masking it as a cough. While the host began to walk away I winked at you. “We have to get into character, right?”

-

Dinner was spectacular, although we could have been at a Denny’s and I still would have had a great time with your company. That’s not to say going to Rover’s was overrated, it really was as good as we thought it would be. You seemed so carefree, it was nice to see you free of your usual anxious demeanor. That was a far stretch from how you looked now as we drove to an exclusive party that you had no want to go to. You were practically white-knuckling in the car. My hand found yours, the other still planted firmly on the steering wheel. I gave it a gentle squeeze. You didn’t say anything, but the squeeze you returned to my hand told me more than any words would have anyway. It was one of my favorite things about our friendship, we knew each other better than anyone else, no words necessary.

The house spanned almost a block, with a smattering of people, all in varying states of drunkenness, across the lawn and flocking in through the wide set of French doors. I got out first, moving to open your door, before offering my arm. “Oh my god, you cheeseball.” You took my arm gingerly despite your words, letting your hand slip down to mine once we started walking. Before we made it in I made it a point to stop you, leaning down towards your ear, letting you hear me over the loud thrumming from the music inside.

“I won’t let us get separated, okay, so don’t worry.” I paused for a moment trying to articulate my thoughts in the least embarrassing way. “And, I don't know how far you're comfortable with taking the act. I know we didn't talk about it too much, so if anything happens and you're uncomfortable let me know and I'll figure a way out of it, okay? Is there anything you want to avoid?" My face was burning, asking was important to avoid causing you any unnecessary panic, but it still felt odd asking what the limits of our fake-relationship were. When I pulled back enough to hear your response, you were just as flustered as I was.

“If the situation calls for it, almost anything. And I'll only go through with it if you’re okay with it too. Can we go inside?” Your voice, even as close to me as it was, was just barely over a whisper, your nerves evident. It reminded me of my own voice, ripe with longing in so many conversations we had had and I entertained the thought, even if only for the briefest of moments, that maybe you were pining for me too.

The inside of the house made the front lawn look like the prohibition. People were passed out at random parts of the room, narrowly avoiding the houseguests who were in the middle of sloppy make-outs. The whole thing felt like it was ripped from a cheesy teen film. You were still holding my hand, having taken the lead to drag me through the house to the enclosed back deck where people thankfully seemed to be a little soberer.

“(Y/n), you were able to make it good, and oh- I knew you two were a thing, although I will say I’m surprised.” Lotor’s posh voice rang clear through the chatter and although he didn’t outright say it, his meaning hung heavy in the air: he was demeaning you, saying he was surprised you’d managed to be dating me. Just another tactic to lower your self-worth enough for him to go in for the kill. I hated guys like that, who thought that 'negging' was an appropriate way to win someone over. Besides that, the idea was stupid and I wanted to tell him off, I’d die happy if you ever decided to grace me with being my girlfriend, for him to even insinuate that I was too good for you was absurd.

“I'm Shiro, nice to meet you. (N/n), has told me all about you all, it’s good to finally be able to put a face to the name.” I laughed hollowly, enough to give the random passerby the idea of a friendly interaction but cold enough to let Lotor know I didn't appreciate what he was doing, at least I hoped it did.

“Oh my goodness! So you and her are actually dating?!” A bubbly girl came over, hair in a long reddish-pink ponytail and with a drink in her hand; it was definitely not her first. Lotor threw her a look that screamed: "shut up". SHe didn't even notice.

I smiled warmly, squeezing your hand. “We are. For a while now actually. I honestly thought it was common knowledge?” I laughed, hoping she bought it. Her eyes widened, lips forming an ‘o’.

“Wow! I actually had no idea.” She leaned over to you, winking. “Nice catch. Axca is over there by the way, but you should stay a while. Y’know- eat, drink, be merry.” She giggled before swaying back over to a group of people she had been talking to.

“Come on, I need to talk to Axca.” You pulled me along by the hand, maneuvering through the crowd uneasily. I drew closer to you, hoping the close proximity eased your nerves the same way it eased mine. When we finally stopped, you stayed tucked under my arm, making warm contentment spread through my chest.

“(Y/n), Ezor sent you my way, I presume?” A girl with electric blue hair and a dark jacket sat on a relatively untouched sofa in the corner on her phone, her bag slung next to her.

“Yeah. I’m glad she didn’t send me on a wild goose chase. You have the notes, right?” She nodded but made no move to take them out. You shuffled next to me, words tumbling out of your mouth to fill in the silence that had stretched on for an uncomfortable amount of time. “Can I please have them? Parties aren’t really my scene…” After another beat of silence you continued, “... and Shiro and I already had plans so… yeah.” This caught Axca’s attention, her eyes darting from the screen of her phone to meet your eyes.

“Oh? So you’re still pretending?” She said it without a hint of amusement as if genuinely puzzled.

“Pretending?” You practically squeaked the word out before continuing, quickly covering up your shock. “What in the world are you talking about?”

Axca looked between us. “There’s no trace of you two being together in your online presence. The four of us all figured you were faking. Almost none of us actually thought you were dating him, Ezor just wanted to get a rise out of you and Lotor…” She paused, deciding that what she was going to say was better left unsaid. “So you two really have been dating? You don’t make it too obvious.”

I could practically feel you fuming beside me. “Just because we don't flaunt it like some Insta-couple doesn't mean we haven't been dating.” Axca shrugged, fixing you with a disbelieving and uninterested look. “I mean, really! Isn’t it bad enough that you all tease me all the time!? Now you’re trying to catch me in a lie that you all set up?!” You were shouting, the weeks worth of subtle bullying finally boiling over. It was garnering the attention of party-goers nearby.

“What’s going on?” A tall girl with curly space buns spoke, Ezor was leaning heavily against her side. She radiated intimidation and I felt you shrink against me. Still, you held your ground.

“You all set me up and I don’t appreciate that. Especially since Shiro and I are actually dating and he went out of his way to be here to prove as much to you all.”

“Is that so? Axca what did you find out?”

“Not much. They’re all over each other’s pages, but it’s not necessarily romantic.” She tossed the tall girl, Zethrid if my memory of your description was right, her phone.

Zethrid looked over the contents of the phone before laughing. “Prove it then, (Y/n).”

“That’s enough. I’m not just going to let you all taunt her while I stand here. Axca, was it? (N/n) is here for the notes you have. If you would kindly hand them over. As she's already told you all we have plans and I’d rather not have to postpone the date I planned with my girlfriend because you all think making fun of her is fun.”

“Is that so?” Lotor came strolling from behind us, a fourth woman leading him. She stood quiet, her gaze piercing.

I turned to him. “Yeah. It is.”

“Go on then, Prince Charming. If you love, (Y/n) so much, then why don’t you do something to prove it. Otherwise, I'm sure there's someone who could make her much happier.” He spared a glance at you.

"She's not a prize to be won-" I looked over at you, you’d taken to squeezing my hand. As I turned you grabbed me by the collar and before my brain had a moment to register what was happening you’d pulled me down to press a kiss to my lips. My mind raced and after a second for my mind to process what was happening, I wrapped an arm around your waist pulling you closer as we kissed. You were the first to pull back, a shy smile gracing your lipstick smudged lips. A whistle sounded in the back, along with some cat-calls. You didn’t seem to care, and honestly, I knew how you felt. It was like a bubble was around us as I leaned down to kiss you again.

I would have kissed you until the sun came up and the crowd dispersed but an arrogant voice broke through the haze. “Alright, we get it!” When we broke apart, Lotor stood silently fuming. “Axca give her the notes so they can leave.”

“But I thought-”

“Just give her the notes.” Axca did, fishing a perfectly labeled folder from her bag and handing it to you. As she did, Lotor moved

towards you with a barely hidden sneer on his face as he leaned down to whisper something to you. Clutching the folder, you jogged back over to me, taking my hand in yours as you did.

We made it outside, walking down the sidewalk to the car. The voices and blaring music fading quickly behind us. “Are you okay?”

You hadn’t looked at me, much less answered. We sat in silence even as my question hung in the air. “You kissed me.”

“What? I thought we agreed... You pulled me-”

“The first would’ve proven enough. But you kissed me a second time. Why?”

I couldn’t discern the odd tone of your voice. I felt jumpy all of a sudden. “I just- we had to convince them-”

“Was it just an act then?” You turned to me, tears quickly polling in your eyes. Guilt stung at my heart, I’d been selfish, thinking that maybe your feelings were the same as my own and instead I’d made you uncomfortable and confused. You deserve the truth at the least.

I took a slightly ragged breath. There were a million ways to tell you that I’d loved you since we were nothing more than two kids sitting with a book in our laps behind a tree, hell I’d even imagined it a handful of times, and yet not once did I think this would be how you'd find out. “No. No, I- I shouldn’t have done this. It’s never been an act, not for me at least. I never meant for it to go this far but then you kissed me and I thought- I should have realized it was just for the act. I’m sorry, I fucked up. You have every right to be mad at me, but please if there’s any way that we can still be friends. I don’t want to lose you.” I was rambling, but I couldn’t find the right words and I couldn’t fix it- couldn’t make the harsh feeling of rejection leave or take my actions back.

“Shiro.” Your hand came to cup my cheek, stopping me in my tracks. “Slow down. Let me get this right, you were never acting?” Your eyes glanced between mine as if searching for the truth. I nodded. “So you really wanted to take me on a date and kiss me?” I nodded again, trying to dip my head to hide my blushing features. The hand cupping my cheek stopped me. “How long?”

“What?”

“How long have you felt like this?”

I swallowed thickly. “How long? Um… yes?" A strained, nervous laugh escaped me, "I mean, I can’t even think of a time when I didn’t. M’sorry.”

I chanced a glance at you to see your reaction. I certainly wasn’t expecting you to be barely holding back a fit of giggles. Ouch. You must have seen me cringe because you quickly stopped. “Sorry, I’m sorry. It’s just, god, you mean to tell me we could have been doing this so much sooner?”

“I- what?” I couldn’t let myself believe what I was hearing. You rolled your eyes good-naturedly.

“You and I could have been dating for years now. Are we both seriously such disasters that we’ve literally been pining for each other for years?!” You sounded incredulous and I found myself laughing in disbelief along with you.

“I guess you’re right. So does that mean that we can…” My words faded away as we leaned towards each other.

“Please?” Your words ghosted over my lips, teasing me for what was only seconds away. In the warmth of the car we kissed, it was the same but different than the kisses from before. The same subtle taste of your cupcake chapstick and yet it was so much… More. Maybe it was because we both knew it was what we wanted or maybe it was just the knowledge that I would be allowed to do this again and again and again, but the feeling of kissing you was intoxicating, a sensation that I knew I would never be able to get enough of.

-

It had only been a week since we went to the party and confessed, but everything still seemed so perfect. Ironically, very little had changed. You were still my best friend, after all. We were sitting in our usual spot, I was reading out an original piece of yours, both to revise/edit it at your request and because I had been dying to read it. I’d finished it, marking out a few editorials and encouraging notes on the margins of the paper. As I wrote a thought came to mind. “I've been wondering something.”

“Oh?”

“What had Lotor said to you that night?”

You rolled your eyes, huffing with annoyance. “He said that when I had my heart broken by you that he’d be there for me to come groveling back to.”

“What a prick.”

“Right?”

“For the record, I will never break your heart.” You laughed.

“Thanks for the reassurance, casanova.”

“No problem, my love.” I grinned as your teasing expression gave way to a flustered one. You slipped your hand into mine, hiding your face on my arm.

“Mm-uff-oo.”

I chuckled, some things never changed. “I have no idea what you just said.”

You pulled back just enough to be heard. “I said, I love you.”

I smiled, pressing a kiss to the top of your head. “I love you too.”

[tiny-opal-essence]

Pocket Paladin Chpt 17

Whatever can go wrong will go wrong

Previously...

Team Voltron has discovered that the person they rescued from Lotor was not Shiro, but a clone with Shiro's memories.  While initially unsure of how to proceed, they are fully supportive of the renamed Ryo.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Lance blearily opened his eyes.  It was still dark in the room.

How long until breakfast?

He shoved Keith’s bandana off and got out of his bed.  He walked over to the edge of the dollhouse floor to check the clock on Keith’s wall.

Still a few varga.  Yay.

Lance had been having some trouble sleeping through the night lately.  Even though the doll bed was a huge improvement from the improvised cotton balls and Kleenex, it still wasn’t designed for someone to actually sleep in comfortably.  He didn’t think it was really that important to mention to anyone.  There are more important things than one person’s comfort.

He looked over and saw Keith was still asleep in his bed.

At least one of us is comfortable.  Glad I didn’t wake him up.

Keith’s face was relaxed for once.

He looks so soft.  Huh.  Never thought “soft” would be a word associated with Keith.

Lance sat down on the edge of the floor, kicking his legs slightly.

I’m glad he and Ryo were able to talk things out yesterday.  It would kind of suck for Voltron if the black and red paladins weren’t speaking to each other.  We don’t really have anyone who can sub.  At least, not until I’m back to normal.  And who knows when that’s going to be.

Lance leaned back on the floor keeping his ankles dangling off the edge.

Even if I do get back to normal, would Blue want me back?  Allura’s done such a great job with her.

‘The team does work better without you.  You’d hate to ruin all of their progress, right?’

Yeah.

‘They’re better off without you.’

Before Lance could dwell more on those thoughts, he heard a soft *groan*.  He sat up and looked over.

Keith’s face that had been relaxed just a moment ago was now scrunched up in discomfort.  He started shifting around in his bed while mumbling out something unintelligible.

He’s having a nightmare!  I have to help him.

“Keith!  Wake up!” Lance called out, but Keith did not wake up.

Maybe I’m too far away.  I need to get closer.

Lance stood up and looked off the edge of the dollhouse floor.

Yeah, nothing there to break my fall if I jump.  Guess the quickest route is the stairs.

He ran across the room and opened the door to the hallway.  He nearly tripped down the stairs in his haste.  He stepped down onto the nightstand and saw that Keith was now laying on his back.

“Yo, Mullet!” Keith showed no signs that he heard him.

Quiznak.  Still not close enough.  Okay.  There’s only a couple inches between the nightstand and the pillow.  That’s not too far, right?

‘It might as well be the grand canyon at your height.’

Well, if I get a running start, I should make it.  I was always good at long jump in gym class.

‘But in class you didn’t have to worry about falling to your death.’

Ok, that’s enough from you, stupid voice.  I’m going to make it.  Just you watch.

Lance hurried over to the far side of the nightstand and took a deep breath.

Ok, here goes nothing.

He ran back towards Keith and leaped off the edge.

Yes!  I made it!

He had landed on the edge of the pillow that was hanging off the bed.

Phew.  Wait, no no no no no!

He started sliding down towards the chasm between the bed and nightstand but managed to grab ahold of the pillowcase.  He could feel the pillow shifting somewhat beneath him.

Oh yeah, the pillow would shake because Keith’s twitching in his sleep.

Lance began climbing up the pillow making sure to keep a good grip on it in case Keith really started moving around.  He could see the beads of sweat on Keith’s forehead.

He looks hot.  And not in the good looking kind of way.  Ok, maybe partly in the good looking way, but now’s really not the time to focus on my stupid crush on him.

Lance continued climbing along the pillow until he reached the indent caused by Keith’s head.  He slid down the incline and came to a stop in front of his cheek.  As Lance tried to stand up on the soft pillow, Keith let out another *groan* and moved his head slightly, causing Lance to fall back against his face.

“Really, Keith?  I try to help you out and this is the thanks I get?  *sigh* You’re lucky you’re cute.”  Lance said in good humor as he tried to stand again, this time bracing himself against Keith who had become still once more.

That means he probably didn’t hear me call him cute.  Good.  Don’t know what he’d think if he found out I like him.

Lance was now standing in front of Keith’s ear.

Let’s hope he can hear me now.

“Keith!  Buddy, pal, my dude!  Despierta!”

Keith shot awake, causing the pillow to rise up and Lance to fall down on his butt yet again, but he wasn’t too concerned about that since it was a soft landing.

Keith looked around the room as he got his breathing under control.  Once his breathing sounded normal, Lance called up to him.

“Glad you finally heard me.”

“Of course I heard you,” Keith said as he turned to sit facing Lance.  “You were yelling right in my ear.”

“Heh heh, sorry.  You didn’t seem to hear me until I got closer.  Did you hear anything else I said?”

Please don’t have heard me say you’re cute, please don’t have heard me say you’re cute.

“No.” Keith lied.  “Why?”

“No reason.”

Phew.  He didn’t hear that.

But Keith had heard.  He had heard Lance say that he was lucky he was cute.  He had also heard the sarcasm in the lines before that and assumed the last line was also meant sarcastically.  It was a common saying after all.

“Wait a minute, why are you here?”

“Why are any of us here?”

“Lance, you know I mean why are you here sitting on my pillow?  And how did you get there?”

“I jumped.”

“What?”  Keith said with a blank look on his face as his brain tried to piece things together.

“Well, you were having a nightmare and couldn’t hear me from my bed, so I came over to help you wake up from it.”

“And you jumped down from your room!?”

“No.  I would have broken a leg or something if I jumped down from there.  I jumped from the nightstand to your pillow.”

Keith looked over and saw the gap between those two objects.  He realized just how far of a jump and how long of a fall that would be for Lance at his height.

“What the hell, Lance?  Do you realize how dangerous that was for you!?”

“I’ve always been good at long jump.  I knew I would make it, and besides.  You needed help.  Your nightmare seemed pretty bad.”

Keith was too tired to argue with Lance about the dangers of parkour at his height, so he decided to move the conversation in a different direction.

“It wasn’t a nightmare.  It was a memory.”

“Oh.”  Lance paused for a moment.  “Do you want to talk about it?”

“Maybe…I don’t know.”

“Don’t worry, Keith.  If you want to talk, I’m here.  If you want to just go back to sleep, that’s fine.”

Keith let out a small *yawn*.

“Maybe you should lie down.”

Don’t want you literally falling asleep on me.

“I should move you back to the nightstand first.”

“Dude, I don’t take up that much room.  Here, I’ll even scoot over.” Lance did just that.  “Now you’ve got plenty of space.”  Lance patted the pillow next to him to emphasize his point.

“But-”

“Lie down, Keith.  As long as you go slow it shouldn’t be too shaky for me.”

Keith hesitatingly lied back down on his side.  As his head sunk into the pillow, he was only able to keep one eye on Lance as the other one’s vision was blocked by the pillow itself.

Once Keith was still, Lance lied down on his side facing him.

“Draw me like one of your French girls,”  Lance said with dramatic flair as he struck the pose.

This earned him a *snicker* from Keith.

“Ha!  I got you to laugh!”

“That wasn’t a laugh.”

“It’s close enough!”

Keith rolled his eyes while Lance let out a *snicker* of his own.

“All seriousness though, are you ok, Keith?”

“Yeah.  Or mostly, I guess.  A lot happened yesterday and it brought up some memories.”

“I can understand that.  We were all pretty shocked with Ryo’s reveal.”

“It’s more than that.  It just…it feels like everyone who cares about me winds up leaving in the end, willing or not.  My mom, my dad, Shiro, twice.”

“Keith-”

“And I know why my mom left.  I understand.  But that doesn’t change the fact that she left.  And I haven’t heard anything from her since finding the Blade of Marmora.”

“Keith, Kolivan told us how much danger she would be put in if any attempts were made to contact her.  Remember what happened to his sister, Keerthana?”  Lance gently mentioned.

Keith *sighed* “Yeah, I know.  It might blow her cover because of how high up in the chain of command she is.  But I don’t even know her name!  My dad never got the chance to tell me before he died.  And Kolivan thinks that if I knew her name I would get Pidge to find her in the Galra Empire’s database.”

“Well, would you?”

“Yes.  I wouldn’t contact her though.  I know how important her mission is.  And I don’t even know what I’d say.  It’s just…what if we’re fighting the empire and just happen to kill her before realizing who she is?”

Lance could tell how worried Keith was about that happening.

“Have you told Kolivan why you want to know?”

“No.  It’s a stupid thing to worry about.”

“It’s not stupid to worry about your family, Keith.”

Lord knows I worry about mine all the time.

“Easy for you to say.  You and your family are close.  My mom’s the only family I have and I don’t know her.  All I ever got from her was a lockbox with a self-storage key in it.  That’s where I found the hoverbike, Marmora sword, and a letter saying that since I was old enough then, my dad would explain everything.  Too bad my dad had died 8 years before that.”

“Do you still have the letter?”

“I tore it up after I read it.  I was angry.”

“*dramatic gasp* Keith?  Angry?” Lance said while trying to hide a smile.

“I was 16, I had anger issues.”

“Newsflash, you still have anger issues.” Lance teasingly responded.

“I’ve gotten better.”

“And we are all proud of you for that.”

There was a bit of comfortable silence between them.

“So…your dad died when you were…8?” Lance did the math in his head.

“Yeah.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t.  I got so sick of people saying that to me at his funeral.  Everyone said that if I needed anything all I had to do was ask.  What I needed was my dad.  It had always been just the two of us.  He didn’t talk about my mom much, but when he did, you could see how much he missed her.  There was always this hidden sad look on his face.  I hated that she was making my dad feel upset by not being there.  He said that mom was working and would come back to us someday.  I thought she might come to his funeral, but that didn’t happen.  Now I know why.  He always said she was out of this world.  I never realized how literal he was being.”

“Not to interrupt, but props to your dad for one of the best dad jokes ever with the whole ‘out of this world’ cause your mom’s an alien thing.”

“Yeah.  He’d’ve liked you.”

Lance perked up slightly at hearing that.

My crush’s dad would have liked me!?

“You both have terrible jokes,” Keith said.

“Hey, my jokes aren’t terrible!” Lance sat up indignantly.

“Okay, they’re not terrible.”

Lance saw the amusement in Keith’s eyes.

“Darn right!” Lance said as he lied back down.  He let out a *yawn* a moment later.

“Do you need me to give you a hand back to your bed?” Keith asked.

“Keith, was that a pun?"

“Not an answer.”

“Ok, maybe eventually, but I can stay up a bit longer.  I’m comfy.”

“If you say so.”

There was more comfortable silence before Keith spoke up again.

“Sorry for talking so much.”

“Dude, it’s fine.  I’m glad you trust me enough to open up more about what you’re going through.”

“You’re not going to tell anyone else, are you?”  Keith asked.

“Of course not.  This is your tragic backstory.  I’m not going to force you to tell the others.  That would be rude.”  Lance paused for a moment.  “I am a bit curious about one thing.  How did your dad die?  Please don’t feel like you have to answer.  I totally understand if you don’t want to talk about it.”

“It’s ok.”  Keith *sighed*.  “That’s actually what I was remembering in my dream.  He died in a fire.  Some sort of freak accident.  He barely managed to push me out the door before the house collapsed on him.  The only part that didn’t burn down was the shack.”

“Wait, the shack in the desert?”

“*mhmm* I lived there after being kicked out of the Garrison.”

“But you said earlier you grew up in the system.  Why didn’t you go to your foster family?”

“I had already aged out of the system by then.  I went through a few different foster homes.  The last one was nice, but their house never felt like home.  It’s ok though.  I spent most of my free time at the shack with my hoverbike anyways.  Living there just made more sense.  My dad had already paid for the land and left it all to me in his will, so I didn’t have to worry about rent.”

“That’s nice.”

“Yeah.”  Keith paused for a moment.  “You know what’s ironic?  My dad was a firefighter and he died in a fire in his own home.  And now I’m the red paladin, the paladin of fire.”

“The universe has a twisted sense of humor sometimes.”

“*mhmm*” Keith agreed.  “I can still remember so many details from that day.  It had been a dry summer.  The house lit up like kindling.  I was so scared I couldn’t move.  I could hardly hear my dad over the roaring of the fire.  He gave me his bandana and told me to put it over my mouth and close my eyes while he grabbed me and ran for the door.  That was the last time I saw him alive.”

“Keith, are you ok?”  Lance sat up as he saw Keith’s eyes starting to tear up.

“…No.”

“I’m going to hug you now.  Is that ok?”

“Yeah.”

Lance moved closer to hug Keith’s face, albeit awkwardly due to the unique surface of the pillow.

“For what it’s worth, I’m sorry you’ve had to go through all that.  And I hope that you know none of us would ever leave you by choice.  You’re stuck with us whether you like it or not!”

“*heh* Thanks.”  Keith sniffled out.

“Anytime.”

Lance tried to make it seem natural, but after several minutes of comforting Keith, even he had to admit

“This is a weird kind of angle for a hug, isn’t it?”  Lance felt the air blow past him as Keith *sighed* through his nose.

“-s fine.”

“Yeah, but are you fine?”

“I will be.”  Keith’s eyes were clearer now.

“Do you want me to stay with you?  In case the nightmare memory comes back?”

Keith had to stop himself from blurting out ‘Yes’.  He was surprised how quickly he wanted to respond ‘Yes’ to Lance.  He wanted Lance to stay.  But that might not be the safest place for Lance to be.

“Aren’t you already technically staying with me since you’re rooming here?”

“Good point, but I wasn’t able to wake you up yelling from the dollhouse.  I had to get closer, so it would make sense for me to stay closer to you in case the dream happens again, but I would only do that if you’re ok with it.  Do you want me to stay?”

“That might not be the safest idea.  What if I roll over in my sleep and hurt you?”

“You’re a pretty sound sleeper.  You don’t move around at all.  Well, except for nightmares.  And as soon as I feel the pillow move, I would know what’s happening and help wake you up from it.  It would be fine, long as you’re ok with it.”

“*sigh* Ok.  You can stay.  Just for tonight.”

“Deal.”

Keith knew he rarely moved in his sleep, yet he was still worried about accidentally hurting Lance.  But he trusted that Lance understood the risks.  He sat up slowly and reached over towards the dollhouse, grabbed the bandana, and handed it over to Lance before lying back down.

“Thanks, Keith.”

“No problem.”

“Wait, is this the bandana from the fire?”

“Yes?”

“Dude, this is like the only thing you have left of your dad’s.  I shouldn’t be using this!”  Lance pushed the bandana away from himself.

“It’s fine.”

“But this is probably really special and significant to you.” Lance paused as he realized something.  “Oh my God.  I’ve been drooling all over the last thing your dad ever gave you!”

“It’s ok.  It does mean a lot to me, but you need it more than I do.  Besides, your drooling’s not really that noticeable at your height.”

“Yeah, but-“

“I said it’s fine, so it’s fine.”

“If you say so.”

Lance grabbed the bandana and pulled it up to his chin.  A part of him still felt a bit guilty about using something that meant so much to Keith, but Keith had said it was fine.

“*heh* Usually I’m the one telling you it’s fine.”

“*heh* Yeah, I guess you are,” Keith responded with a small smile.

Lance could feel his eyelids growing heavy.

Keith *yawned* a moment later and looked over at the clock on the wall.  “It’s getting late.”

“Or is it getting early?” Lance joked while trying to stifle a *yawn* of his own.

“Either way, it’s probably time for us to get some sleep.” He paused for a moment.  “Thanks for listening.”

“No worries, Keith.  If you ever want to talk about that stuff again, my door is always open.  Or I guess my wall is always open since the wall of the dollhouse is open.”

“Does everything have to be a pun with you?”

“You know you love it.”

-me.  But that’s just wishful thinking.

Keith rolled his eyes with a smile.  “Goodnight, Lance.”

“Night, Keith.”

It was quiet for a minute.

“You’re staring again,” Lance said teasingly before he opened his eyes.

“Oh, uh, sorry.  I’ll just turn around and-”  

“Don’t worry about it, it’s fine.  I’ve gotten used to it.  Besides, I know how hard it is to take your eyes off all of this.”

“Oh my God, Lance, just go to sleep.” Keith *groaned* out into his pillow to hide his smile.

“Ok, fine.  Buenas Noches, Keith.”

“G’night, Lance.”

This time, they both closed their eyes and fell asleep once more.

It was the best sleep Lance had had in a long time.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Lance had lost track of how long they had been walking.  Well, how long everyone but him had been walking given that he was riding in Keith’s utility belt pocket.  He would have preferred a jacket pocket, but since the savanna-like planet of Gefahr was so warm, Allura thought it best that everyone wear their armor as it regulated temperature.  There was no need for added layers.

Lance had tried to argue for riding on someone’s shoulder since the planet was uninhabited, but was quickly shot down by Hunk pointing out that just cause there are no people on the planet doesn’t mean there aren’t other creatures who might mean Lance harm.  So Lance was stuck in the utility belt pocket.

Hunk had finally gotten around to fixing his own utility belt pockets so Lance had assumed he would go with him, but was surprised when Keith had volunteered to be the one to bring him along.  Lance had jokingly said that he ‘could do with a change of scenery’, but once you’ve ridden in one utility belt pocket, you’ve ridden in them all.  There was only the slightest of differences in material.

He kept watching the tall blue grass go by through the partially open zipper.

I’d ask how much longer it’s going to be, but I’d just get the same answer as all the other times.

‘You don’t want to bother them, right?  Though you’ll find another way to bother them regardless.’

I don’t remember asking for your opinion.

Lance worked to ignore those thoughts and relax with the slight swaying of the pocket he was in.  He could tell Keith and the rest of the group were moving slower than usual, most likely so it was a less bumpy ride for him.  He was grateful but wanted to get out of the pocket sooner rather than later.  It was starting to get a bit claustrophobic, but Lance didn’t want anyone else to know that.  He didn’t want them to see him as weak.

Ok, it can’t be that much longer, right?  Hunk was so excited to find a planet with new types of food to work with in the kitchen.  Allura would have parked the castleship closer if we could, but apparently, the ground is too soft for the castleship to land without damaging it.  She wouldn’t make us walk farther than we had to.  Actually, no.  She might consider it part of training, like pulling your weight.

‘You’re certainly not pulling your own weight.’

Hey, I have less weight to pull, so I don’t have to do as much.

‘And a good thing too.  There’s not much you actually can do.’

I can do things!

‘Like what?’

Stuff…things…umm…

Lance was shaken from his thoughts as he felt the pocket stop swaying.

Finally.

“Can I come out yet?” Lance asked through the comms.

“Not yet.  Pidge still has to do a scan of the nearby area to make sure there’s no animals that might be a threat to you.”  Ryo answered.

“Don’t worry, it won’t take more than a few tics,”  Hunk added on.

Lance heard the wrist scanner boot up and make a few sounds.

“Looks like we’re all clear.  You’re good, Lance.” Pidge stated.

Thank God.

The zipper was opened all the way and Lance climbed onto Keith’s offered hand.

Keith brought him up to his shoulder.

“I’ll keep the scanner running so if something does get too close we’ll get a heads up since the castleships scanners are down while Coran works on them,”  Pidge stated as she pushed a few buttons on said scanner.

“An excellent idea, Pidge.  This way we can ensure Lance’s safety.”  Allura commented.

“So this is the schakalberry tree?” Lance asked as everyone looked at the tree in front of them.

“Yep,”  Hunk responded.

“That is one tall tree,” Ryo commented as he looked up towards the top of the tree.

“It’s huge!” Pidge exclaimed.

“I feel like an ant,”  Keith added on.

“Think about how I feel,”  Lance said from his shoulder.

I feel like an ant around the rest of the team.  If they feel like ants with this tree, what does that mean I feel like?  An ant to an ant?  Is there a better way to phrase that?

‘Of course there is, but you aren’t about to think of it.’

“What exactly is an ant?” Allura asked.

“They’re a type of bug on earth,” Hunk responded.  “They’re pretty little, like yea big.”  Hunk pressed his pointer finger and thumb closer together but kept them from touching to show Allura how small ants are.

‘And that’s exactly what you are.  A little bug, a pest.  And what do we do with bugs?’

Nope, not thinking about that nightmare.  Never thinking about that again.  They would never actually do that.

‘Not intentionally, but well, accidents do happen.’

Lance could almost hear the smirk in the voice.

“Looks like there are some low hanging branches.  Keith, why don’t you and Lance work on those while the rest of us pick some from the higher branches?”  Allura suggested.

“That’s where the sweetest berries are according to the Falleans.”  Hunk commented.

“Sounds good,” Keith responded.

“Here’s a bucket for you two.”  Pidge handed one of the 5 buckets to Keith.

“Don’t I get my own bucket?”

“You aren’t really in the position to carry a bucket right now, Lance.”  Hunk said gently.

“Even if we did have a bucket in your size, it would only hold a few berries.  It just makes more sense for you and Keith to share.”  Pidge pointed out.

“Ok, fair point,”  Lance responded from Keith’s shoulder.

Pidge gave everyone else a bucket and they used their jetpacks to fly up towards the uppermost branches of the schakalberry tree.

Lance felt a little upset that he was, in essence, grounded even though his jetpack worked just fine.  He understood the others’ worries about him falling, but the jetpack would stop him from falling.  Or slow his falling enough for one of them to grab him.  It wouldn’t be that big a deal.  He knew they wouldn’t let him fall.

Keith was now standing in front of one of the low hanging branches.  He put his hand out for Lance to climb on.

“Relax, Mullet.  I got a jetpack too.”

“Are you ever going to stop calling me that?”

“Are you ever going to not have a mullet?” Lance stood up on Keith’s shoulder.

“No.”

“There’s your answer.”

With that Lance used his jetpack to fly over to the nearest branch.  He almost didn’t notice Keith’s hands below him ready to catch him if he fell.  Key word almost.

Does Keith think that I can’t do this too?

‘Of course he does.  He’s stuck babysitting you while the others are actually doing something productive.’

Keith put the bucket down on the ground underneath the branch Lance was now standing on before walking over to another low hanging branch and starting to pick berries.  Lance did the same.

The berries were the size of basketballs to him.  He grabbed the closest one and started pulling on it.  He could feel the resistance of the berry.

Ok, this is harder than I thought.

He looked over and saw Keith having no trouble with his branch.

Ok, maybe it’s just me.  How to do this?  Aha!  Got it!

Lance grabbed the berry once more.  This time as he pulled, he also used his jetpack for an extra boost.  The berry resisted for a moment before coming free.

“Oof.”  Lance landed on his back on the branch.

“Are you ok?” Lance saw the concerned look on Keith’s face.

“I’m good.  Just needed a little boost strength-wise.”

“You don’t have to do this if it’s hard.”

“It’s fine, Keith.”  Lance dropped the berry into the bucket below.  “I want to help the team as much as I can while I’m like this.  This is something I can do.”

Not well, but I can still do it.

Lance couldn’t help but feel inadequate when Keith walked over and dropped a handful of berries into the bucket.

Is this even worth the effort?  At the rate I’m going, I’m only going to pick like 10 before Keith manages to fill the bucket.  Every little bit counts, but my little bit is hardly a drop in the bucket.  Or would it be berry in the bucket?  Lance thought with a small smile.

‘You’re not funny.’

Yeah, I know.

It wasn’t too long before Keith was back with yet another handful of berries.

Lance grabbed another berry and started to pull with the help of his jetpack.

“Um, Lance?” Keith said.

“Yeah?” Lance responded after dropping the second berry into the bucket.

“I wanted to apologize for last night.  The whole waking you up and-“

“You didn’t wake me up, Keith.  I was awake for a bit before your nightmare memory thingee.”

“You were?”

“Yeah.  The doll bed’s not really designed for actual use, so I’ve woken up in the middle of the night a few times.  Last night was probably some of the best sleep I got since the whole getting shrunk thing.”

“Really?”

“Yeah.  Pillows are like clouds at this height.”  Lance paused for a moment.  “Thanks again for grabbing the bandana blanket for me.”

“No problem.  Sorry about grabbing you in my sleep.”

“Grabbing’s a bit of a strong word, Keith.  If anything, you draped your hand over me.  Wait, is that the right word?  Anyways, it’s more like your hand was a heated blanket of some kind.  You didn’t smush me down into the pillow if that’s what you’re worried about.”

“But what if I had?”

“You wouldn’t, Keith.  I know you wouldn’t hurt me.  I’m fine, you’re fine,” very fine, “And everything is fine.”

That is the exact moment that things went wrong.

“Guys, something just popped up on the scanner.  Make that several somethings.”  Pidge warned through the comms.

“What direction are they coming from?”  Keith looked around to see if he could figure it out himself.

“Overhead.”  Pidge and the others landed in front of Keith and Lance.

Keith held out his hand for Lance to climb onto.

“What are they?”  Ryo asked.

“Not sure.  We designed the scanner to warn us of things that would be a threat.  It doesn’t necessarily tell us what they are.” Hunk explained.  “Bit of a design flaw on our part.”

“Well whatever it is, we should get ready,” Lance said.

“Coran, do you see anything on the ship’s scanners?”  Allura asked through the comms.

“I haven’t finished updating them yet, so they’re not active.  Why?”

“We have a lot of movement near us.  We may need to make a quick exit.  How soon can you get the castleship ready to leave?”

“Give me 15 dobashes and she’ll be ready to go.”

“You might want to hurry with that, Coran.  We’ve got company.”  Ryo said as an all too familiar ship came into view overhead flanked by two battle cruisers.

“How did Lotor find us here?  The Falleans said that this was a safe planet!”  Lance exclaimed.

“*Hmm* It has been a while since we’ve heard from the Falleans,” Keith commented mostly to himself.

“Lotor probably figured we were on their tail and would be looking to resupply somewhere,” Allura responded.

“What if there’s something you missed in my head?  What if I’m the reason they found us?” Ryo worried out loud.

“We went over the data multiple times.  If they had put anything in your mind we would have found it.” Pidge answered.

“Is there a chance they don’t know we’re here?”  Hunk asked hopefully.

The ship started shooting at them.

“Well, that answers that question,” Keith said as he transferred Lance to one hand and activated his shield with the other.

“Coran, how much longer till the castleship’s ready to go?”  Ryo asked.

“We’re working as fast as we can.  It shouldn’t be more than another 13 dobashes.  Do you want me to send the lions to meet you?”

“No, the planet drains their power somehow.  We can’t risk them being grounded here.”  Pidge responded.

“That means we can’t form Voltron.  What do we do?” Hunk asked.

“We hold out until Coran can get the ship to us,” Ryo stated.  “Keith, hide Lance.  We don’t need Lotor to know he’s here with us.”

Keith slid Lance back into his utility belt pocket and zipped it most of the way shut.

“Everyone, protect Keith.  We know he’s the intended target.”  Allura reminded the group.

Lance remembered exactly what Lotor had said back then, all the way back when Lance took the hit for Keith.  How it was ‘high time someone cut him down to size.’  They were lucky that Lotor hadn’t managed to hit his intended target.  Lance wouldn’t want anyone else to have to go through what he’s going through.

I wonder why they’re targeting Keith anyways.  Maybe because he’s half Galra?  Or is it racist to assume that?  Uggh.  I hate not being able to see what’s going on.

“I don’t need protection,” Keith stated.

“True, but Lance does,”  Allura commented.  “Lotor finding us here is an unforeseen risk.  We can’t afford anything happening to either of you.”

Nice to know they care, but I can protect myself.

‘Really now?  Then, what would you call all the other times?  You were almost stepped on, nearly crushed under a fist, trapped in a jewelry box, and let’s not forget all but dropped to your death, I could go on.’

Please don’t.  That was before I knew how to handle myself at this height.

‘But that last time was only a few days ago.’

Lance ignored the voice as much as he could and tried to focus on the voices around him.  He could hear Lotor speaking.

“You have something of mine, paladins.”

“Yeah?  Well, you’ve got something of ours.  Where’s Shiro?” Pidge demanded an answer.

“Ah, so you’ve discovered our little ruse.”

“Answer the question,” Keith growled out.

“Even if I did know his location I would not share it.”

“We will find him.” Allura declared.

“Do you hear that?  They actually think they can find him.”  Ezor mocked while the rest of the generals laughed.

Guess all of team Lotor is here too.  Yay.

“We found Ryo.” Hunk pointed out.

“Oh, is that what the project’s calling itself these days?” Zethrid asked out loud.

“You only found this clone because we let you.”  Lotor declared.  “We left you a trail of breadcrumbs and you didn’t suspect a thing.  True, we were hoping that it would be longer before you figured it out.  We believed that with what’s happened to your most important paladin your team would fall apart, but you are still going strong.  Credit where credit’s due.”

“Uh, thank you?”

“Hunk!”

“What?  I’m just being polite.”

“Tell us what you’ve done with Shiro,” Ryo demanded.

“I haven’t done anything with him.”

“LIAR!"

Lance could feel how agitated Keith was.  His shaking in anger was causing the utility belt pocket to shake as well.

“Believe what you will, but I was not involved in that aspect of the project.”

“Then why were you there guarding him?” Allura gestured to Ryo.

“I owed someone a favor.”

“Who?”  Pidge glared at Lotor.

A look of realization came across Ryo’s face.

“The witch.  Haggar.”

“I guess they did give you a brain after all.”

“Hey!  Leave him alone!” Lance had managed to unzip the pocket enough for him to stick his upper body out.

The rest of his team turned and glared at him and Lance swore he could hear them all going “Boiiiii!” in their minds.

“It seems you have a little stowaway,”  Lotor smirked down at Lance.

Oh, yeah, that’s scary.  That is very scary.

“Good to know the spell worked.”

“What do you want, Lotor?” Allura asked while Keith put a protective hand in front of Lance to shield him from view.

“I already told you, you have something of mine.  I am simply here to retrieve him.”

Lance figured Lotor had gestured towards Keith based on how the others reacted.

“We will not allow you to take him,” Allura stated.

“Yeah!  Keith’s our friend!” Hunk declared.

“And teammate!”  Pidge added.

“If you want him, you’re going to have to go through us,” Ryo said.

“So be it.”

Lance was glad that Keith had managed to zip him back in the pocket while everyone else was talking because things started moving quickly, causing him to fall down.

Ok, I’m a little sick of that happening.

He felt something press against the pocket.  Whatever it was stopped and stayed in place once it felt him through the material.

“That you, Keith?”  He hoped it was Keith.  He couldn’t see much in the pocket with just the lights from his armor, not that there was much to see anyways.

“*mhmm*” Keith responded in the comms.

He must be using his shield to protect me.  But what about him?

Lance could hear the clashing of metal around him.

There has to be something I can do.

Lance felt his surrounding shift as something hit the shield.

What was that?

Keith’s hand moved slightly but still managed to keep Lance from being shaken around in the pocket.

This kind of feels like being on that one flying saucer looking ride at the fair.  The one where it spins really fast and you’re pushed against the wall and can’t move.  What was that called again?

There was another sharp lurch in a different direction.  Then yet another direction.

Or maybe this is more like bumper cars.  With a blindfold on.  Would it be better if I could see what’s happening?

Lance barely stopped himself from puking as there was a sudden drop.

Yeah, don’t think seeing would help.

The force pressing against him disappeared and he fell on his hands and knees as the pocket was jerked once more.

“I got him!” Lance heard Zethrid say.

“Good.  Get him to the ship.”  Axha responded as the pocket started shaking.

Keith must be trying to get away.

Lance heard a zipping sound and saw that more light was coming in.

Why would Keith be opening-?  That’s not Keith!

Lance had learned to recognize his teammates’ hands from his new perspective.  He was pretty sure none of them had claws or red skin.

“And he even brought his little friend along for the trip.” Ezor taunted as her hand approached Lance.

Lance backed up into a corner of the pocket in an attempt to get away.  Seeing one of his friends’ hands reaching for him was intimidating enough at this height.  Seeing an enemy’s hand reaching for him was downright terrifying.

“Get away from him!”  Keith was still trying to break free from Zethrid’s grip causing the pocket to shake and making it harder for Ezor to grab at Lance.

Lance managed to avoid the first few attempts, but Ezor eventually snatched him up and start lifting him out of the pocket.  Lance’s fight or flight instinct kicked in and he bit Ezor’s finger.

“Ow!”  Ezor dropped Lance back into the pocket and yanked her hand out of it.

“Babe, are you ok?”  Zethrid’s grip loosened slightly at her girlfriend’s exclamation allowing Keith to break out of it and quickly re-zip his pocket shut.

“He bit me.”  Ezor shot an offended look at Keith and Lance.

“That’s it.  No more Mr. nice guy.”  Zethrid said.

That was her being nice?!  Lance thought as he worked to get his heart to stop racing.

Zethrid and Ezor started charging towards Keith but were suddenly blasted back by a flash of pink energy.

“I believe we said we would not let you take him.”

Keith looked over and saw Allura standing nearby, a small hint of a pink glow still around her outstretched hand.

“Besides,” Pidge joined Allura, “2 against 1 isn’t really fair.”

What about me?  Don’t I count for something?

‘No, you don’t.’

Hey, I can fight too!

‘Yeah, cause biting someone’s finger and then cowering in a corner is a real asset to the team.’

“You ok, Lance?” Keith asked as he put his hand back protectively over the pocket and reactivated his shield.

“Yeah, you?”  Lance put his hand against Keith’s through the fabric of the pocket to let him know he was alright.

“Just a scratch.  No big deal.”

“You can’t keep him from us forever,” Axha commented as she fought against Ryo.

“I can do this all day.”

“And they can do this for much longer,” Lotor stated before multiple transports full of robot sentries dropped down into the fray.

“Why does every villain have an army of robots?” Hunk asked as he avoided a hit from Narti, who had Kova perched on her shoulder.  “Nice kitty.  I don’t want to hurt you-”

*HISS!!!*

“-But you clearly want to hurt me!  Coran, what’s the ETA?”

“It’ll be at least another 4 doboshes until she’s up and running.”

More sentries dropped from the sky surrounding the group.

“That’s not going to be enough time,” Allura stated as she blasted 3 of the sentries to bits before more took their place.

“We need a new plan,” Ryo added as he sliced one up.

“Wait, Lance,” Keith said while blocking a strike from another sentry.  “What about pharaohs?”

“Pharaohs?  What do dead Egyptian dudes have to do with anything?”

“No, pharaohs!  What we talked about yesterday."

“Wait, do you mean Feroz?”

“That’s what I said.”

That was hardly close at all.

“Why not just say ‘Red’?” Lance was honestly curious as to why Keith was trying to be cryptic.

“Think, Lance.”  Keith was forced back by yet another sentry.

“Oh!  Because Lotor and crew can hear what you’re saying, but not so much what I’m saying.  That way they don’t know the plan!”

“Good.” Lance could hear the smile in Keith’s voice.

“I think I’m thinking what you’re thinking.  Coran, would you be able to open Red’s hangar door?”

“Yes, but that would just drain her energy.”

“True, but Red’s the fastest out of the lions.  She could make it to us and bring us to the ship in time for liftoff before being drained completely.”

“It’s risky,”  Allura commented.

“But it might be our only chance,” Ryo added.

“It seems doable.  Pidge, do you think it would work?” Hunk asked.

“Yes.  It will work.  Do it, Coran.”

“Red’s on her way.  I’ll have Black on stand-by in case she doesn’t make it all the way back.”

“She’ll make it back” Lance stated.  “She’s Feroz.”

“Whatever you and your paladins are thinking of doing, it won’t work,” Ezor stated.

“We have you surrounded and outnumbered,” Axha said from the opposite side of the group.

“You’re not getting away this time.”  Zethrid threatened from another side with Kova *meowing* in agreement on Narti’s shoulders opposite her.

The sentries closed in more on team Voltron.  All members of team Voltron found themselves turning between facing each of the 5 members of team Lotor, not sure which of them might strike first.

Keith was the only one to notice Axha aiming a shot at the back of Ryo’s head.  He ran over and reached his arm and shield out and blocked the shot.

Ezor aimed her gun as well.

*pa-choo*

Suddenly there was a hole right through the utility belt pocket only an inch above Lance’s head from his perspective.

“¡Ah Dios!”

“Lance!”  Keith quickly put his shield back in front of Lance.

“As we said before, there will be no escape for you this day.”  Lotor proclaimed.

*ROAR*

All eyes turned towards the sound to see Red racing towards team Voltron.

“That’s what you think, suckers!”  Pidge exclaimed as Red grabbed everyone in her tractor beam and activated her shield.  Once in the cockpit, Keith grabbed the controls and Red started heading back to the castleship.

Team Lotor continued to fire until they could no longer see Red in the sky.

“What are your orders?” Axha looked over to Lotor.

“Let them leave.  We’ve accomplished our goal here.”

“No way they’re letting him on any more missions after that stunt,” Zethrid commented.

“Is that really going to stop him though?” Ezor added with a smile.

“We’ll have to see what the cameras show us on their ship,” Axha answered.

“Is your finger alright, Ezor?” Zethrid let a bit of worry show on her face as she cradled her girlfriend’s hands in her own.

“It’s fine, babe.  He can’t bite that hard at that height anyway.  He just surprised me.  Why? You gonna kiss it better?”

“Of course.  Now, was it this finger?” *kiss*

“Nope.”

“Was it this one?” *kiss*

“No.” *giggle*

“How about this one?” *kiss*

*giggle*

Kova *meowed* on Narti’s shoulder.

“You’re right, Narti.  It is interesting that the green paladin didn’t try to hack the sentries.  And after all the trouble you went through to take down their firewalls and make it so they would self-destruct once hacked.” Lotor lamented.

“Voltron seems to still believe that the red paladin is our target,”  Axha observed.

“Good.  They won’t realize our true target until it’s too late.  You three can head back to the ship now.  I have something to discuss with Ezor.”

The other three generals headed towards one of the transports, but not before Zethrid kissed Ezor on the back of her hands and gave them a reassuring squeeze.

Once the transport took off, Lotor turned to Ezor.

“When I chose each of you as my generals, I asked for one thing in return: Loyalty.  To me and the cause.  You were told to target only the red paladin.  Why did you deliberately go against my orders?”

“I saw an opportunity to take the blue paladin without having to deal with the more complicated parts of the plan.”  Ezor tried not to show how nervous she was.

“And what did that get you?”

“My finger got bit and he got away.”  She looked down in shame.

“Exactly.  You gained nothing from your actions.  By targeting the blue paladin directly, you nearly alerted his team to the truth.  If Voltron found out that he was our true target this early it would be disastrous.  Not only that, when you were told to aim near the top of the pocket, you aimed for the middle.”

“I thought that it would be more effective if the ‘close call’ shot was closer to him.  It would convince them even more that he shouldn’t be out in the field.”

“And in doing so you risked everything.  If he had been sitting up any more in the pocket, your shot would have killed him.  Need I remind you we need the blue paladin alive for the plan to work?”

“I understand, Lotor.”

“I’m not so sure you do.”  Lotor brought a hand to the hilt of his sword.

Ezor *gulped*.  She watched as Lotor seemed to debate something in his head while tightening his grip.

Lotor *sighed* to himself before letting go of the hilt and letting his hand fall back down to his side.

“You are young and naïve.  There is much you do not know.  Consider this a learning experience and see that it does not happen again.  Fate may not be so kind to you in the future.”

“Yes, Lotor.”  Ezor’s voice shook slightly from nervousness as she avoided looking him in the eyes.

“*sigh* You know I care about you.” Lotor put the hand that had grabbed his sword on Ezor’s shoulder and noticed her slight flinch.  “I still hate to think about what might have happened all those years ago if I hadn’t intervened.  They were hurting you.  And all because you are only ¼ Galra.”  Lotor used his other hand to tilt Ezor’s head up so she was looking at him.  “You are Galra.  That should be enough for them.  I know it is enough for me.  Us part Galra have to stick together.  We’re family, after all.”

“I know.”

“I realize I have been unfair to you and the others.  I have been keeping many details of the plan under wraps for fear of anyone beyond us learning of them.  I am deeply sorry for that.”

“You don’t have to apologize, it’s ok.  We all understand. If we needed to know you would let us know.”

“While on the subject, I have an important task for you and Narti tomorrow.  I’ve already explained Narti’s role to her, but you are the key to this portion of the plan.  Everything depends on you doing exactly as I tell you.”

“I won’t let you down again.”

“I know you won’t.  Now pay attention.  This is important."

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“Are you sure you’re ok, Lance?”

“Yes, Hunk.  I’m fine.” Lance tried to push away Hunk’s worried hands that had been hovering around him since he came out of the healing pod.  “I mean, yeah, I’m a bit shaken, but not stirred!” Lance smiled at the reference he made.

“I’m going to assume that’s another earth phrase?” Coran said.

“Something along those lines,” Keith responded.

“*ahem* If we could get back on topic, please,” Allura interjected.  “Given recent events, we have a few things to discuss as a team.  Coran, have you had any success in contacting the Falleans?”

“Not yet, Princess.  All I’m getting is static.  I’ll keep adjusting the frequency and see if I can get through.”

“We need to let them know that Gefahr is no longer safe.  What could have happened that would affect the signal?” Allura wondered out loud.

“It is possible their communicator was damaged,” Pidge suggested.

“The Galra could have something to do with it.” Ryo pointed out.

“Either way, we should continue trying to contact them.” Allura declared.

“Why not just teleduv over there and see what’s going on?” Lance suggested.

“Because we can’t form Voltron right now,” Pidge answered.

“Red was barely able to make it back to the castleship before being completely power drained,” Hunk added on.

“We don’t know what’s on the other side of the wormhole,” Coran mentioned.

“If it is the Galra, as Ryo suspects, it would be best to be able to form Voltron,” Allura explained.

“True, true,” Lance commented.

“Plus, if the Galra are involved we don’t want to walk into a trap,” Ryo responded.

“When does Red say she’ll be ready?” Lance asked.

“Red says she should be ready by tomorrow morning,” Keith answered after asking Red herself through their mental link.

“*sigh* Good.” Allura switched back to her serious face.  “We also need to work on our protection formations.”

“I thought we did a good job today.  They didn’t get Keith.” Pidge commented.

“They almost did,” Allura responded.  “It was sheer dumb luck that Keith got away.  We need to be better next time.”

“I don’t need protection,” Keith said.

“Until we can figure out what Lotor wants with you, you do.  And in the future, we might have to protect someone less capable of protecting themselves.  It is a good idea to do some more training.” Ryo pointed out.

“Fine.” Keith accepted.

“And finally, Lance.  Are you quite sure you’re alright?” Allura asked.

“Yeah, it was just a few cuts and bruises.  Nothing too serious."

“Nothing too serious?!  You almost died!” Hunk exclaimed.

“But I didn’t!  I’m fine.”

“You got lucky this time,” Pidge interjected.  “If that shot had been a millimeter lower, you wouldn’t be here now.”

“And now we know Lotor and his team are not above targeting you in the field.” Ryo pointed out.

“It is for all these reasons and more that certain precautions must be made.  Pidge, would you be able to bring up the rules list?” Allura asked.

“Give me just a sec.” Pidge typed on her laptop.  “Got it.”

“From now on, Lance is not to go on any mission regardless of the risk involved.” Allura declared.

“What?” Lance said softly.  He couldn’t believe what he was hearing.

“No missions.  Period.” Pidge simplified as she edited the rules list.

“We discussed it while you were in the pod and agreed that the risk is just too great.” Ryo apologetically said to Lance.

“But…but the other missions I’ve gone on like this went ok.  We didn’t know that Lotor would show up!”

“Exactly,” Allura stated.  “We do not always know what we will face in the field.  This last mission was proof of that.”

“That was probably just a fluke or something!”

“A fluke that almost cost you your life,” Keith responded, worry showing in his voice.  “You didn’t even try to stay hidden when Lotor showed up.  You let them know where you were as soon as they landed.”

“Well, next time I’ll stay quiet and if Lotor and crew show up, they won’t even know I’m there.”

“Even if you could manage to be quiet that long, Lotor’s team would assume you’re tagging along on every mission now.” Pidge pointed out.  “The best thing for you to do is stay on the castleship where you’re safe.”

“But I want to help!”

“You can help Coran on the bridge,” Ryo mentioned gently.

But that’s not the same.

“Please, Lance.  We just want to make sure you’re safe.” Hunk said upon seeing Lance’s dejected face.

“We’re paladins of Voltron.  We risk our lives every day.”  Lance said while wondering

Why is it different for me?

“And we can’t risk something happening to you,” Coran responded.  “You are the most vulnerable of us right now.”

‘See?  Even Coran doesn’t think you can do anything.  Vulnerable, weak, useless.’

“The Galra almost took you,” Keith said.

“If they had taken you, who knows what they would do?” Hunk worried out loud.

“Lotor would use you against us.  He could force us to hand over Keith.” Allura stated.

‘See who she actually cares about?  Surprise, surprise, it’s not you.’

“For everyone’s safety and peace of mind, yours especially, you need to stay where it’s safe, ok?” Ryo said.

“*sigh* I’ll stay where it’s safe.” Lance agreed.

“Good.”

But I never agreed that that was the castleship.

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Realities without Lance: 137 (+11)

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[goldstonegolem64]

Side story This takes place during  the three years that Voltron went missing. This is also a way for me to put some ideas I had out into the world

“It has been about twenty months since the castle of loins disappeared along with Voltron, some of it’s paladin and princess Allure of Altea. In their Absence they left behind the Coalition and the new Galra empire on the verge of another massive galaxy war. But thank to the efforts of Empire Lotor, Commander Matt Holt and the remaining Paladins of Voltron peace was maintained” Jay stopped reading the news articles and tossed the table onto his desk . He then removed his Glasses, rubbed the bridge of his noise and placed his glasses down on his desk. “ God I need  to get going home ” Jay said as he grabbed his glasses and was ready to  leave his office. 

In the passed year and a half. Jay was put in charge of a coalition and imperial sponsored Mercenary company despite his protest   called the Volt troop.The troop was made up of two fleets of Coalition fighter pilot, Two warship that housed a crew of three hundred each with a near infinite supple of old mode Galra sentries , Fifteen Valkyrie type and five gladiator type robeasts.The troops main job were to protect shipping vessels, clearing planets of Pirates or Maverick Galra fleet commanders that had left the empire after Lotor’s rise to power and  the rare red queen hive world  that was found. It was a pain in the ass. But after two year of fighting a nearly endless battle and countless deaths an near crippling fear that he would not return from a mission . It was nice to finally to not have that fear nagging at the back of his mind 

As he made it to the door it opened suddenly to Reveal a tall purple skinned man with white hair. Jay was caught off guard by this sudden appearance of his friend and the emperor of the Galra empire. Lotor 

“ OH Joseph have I caught you at a bad time” Lotor asked as  

“ No No I was just on my way out. But what brings you here Sir “  Jay asked as he straighten his clothes and looked more dignified. 

“ Please don’t call me sir. Joseph were friends and I’m here to personally hand you this “  Lotor said as he handed Jay a table 

Jay grabbed the table “ First I’m at work so were not friend were  employee and in employer “  Jay watched Lotor rolled his eyes as he heard that “ And second what am I looking at here “Jay said as he looked at the data pad that showed him cargo Ship routes along with picture of what looked like an Altean ships that looked like the Castle of lions. Jay felt his heart skip a beat but something in the back of his told him that it wasn’t them “ I’m guessing that we’re either looking at we’ve professional photo shopped image or we’ve found are selves another Arc”. Jay said as he handed the table back to Lotor

“ Yes it seems like it” Lotor said 

“ Does The Coalition know About this?” Jay asked 

“ Yes Mr. Holt was the one that informed me about it they already sent a team to recover it and they would like some added protection ”  Lotor said 

“ Alright then I will send the twins to handle it ?’  Jay said

 “ Now that we have that out of the way How are the boy’s doing ?’ Lotor said as the two start walking down the hallway 

“Well their still kind of mad at me for being away from home for long periods of time. But they are enjoying school and having friends their own ages. Fitz is finally getting a hang on math and science. Bastion is getting into some trouble do to his habit of hiding and setting up trip wires during recess which as caused a domino effect where other kids are following suit and several teacher have called me to find him Which is getting annoying because Bastion is getting better at hiding when he doesn’t like the class. Usamu is getting better with his powers we’ve lost a few plates but hey he’s getting better he’s also getting better at painting which is nice the girls are loving school and learning about everything “ Jay’s cheek marks started to glow a little “ As well as Ezra’s as moved” 

“ That’s good to hear “ Lotor said smiling 

“ Now how are you holding up mister emperor of half of the know universe  and how are my favorite generals doing I haven’t had time to call them seeing as I’ve been jumping planet to planet ever other week “ Jay said 

“ Well Acxa has spent most of her free time looking for missing paladins on her off time. Ezor and Zethrid are stomping out any warlord or pirates that dare come in to are territory they have also started dating “ 

“ Weren’t they already dating ?” Jay asked confused

“ I don’t know to be honest. Maybe they were and I’m just noticing it now . But never mind that . As for Narti she’s still recovering from being released from my mother control the druids and doctors say she will be cleared to return to active duty in the next few months”  Lotor said smiling 

“ That’s good to hear I” 

“ As for me. I’m board out of my mind. I don’t know how my Father did it. All I do is still there on the throne reading and listening to people reports. I beardly every get to go out and pilot my pieces of the Ragnarok without being followed by three warships. I missed the old day where I could go where I wanted with out everyone freaking out that I might go missing”  Lotor said 

�� well your the last of the royal blood line so if you go missing there will be a power vacuum that will case a massive civil war that will have either never end or Sendek will show up and wage a one side war against the coalition and one wants that” Jay said 

“ Your not wrong but still I hate it” Lotor said 

“ I know but still you have to do it for the better meant for the universe. “  

“ I know “

“ Now have you gotten back into the dating gaming?” Jay asked 

Lotor froze up and looked towards Jay “ No I haven’t but I have had a fair share of suiters. But none of them have meet my standers” lotor said

“ What are your standers again “ Jay asked knowing something was up 

“ Well they need to be head strong, fun to be round , have to have the same interests as me. Acutely like me for who I am and not what I am” 

“ Allura your still after Allura aren’t you “ Jay said as he opened the building front door letting the Emperor out first “Ever after what she said and did to you” 

“ Ok she called me a  tyrant like my father  and slammed me into the ground. Not the worst thing I’ve been through”

“ That’s true also do you want to come by for dinner seeing as your here and the kids would love to see you again”  Jay said as the hanger door opened to revel the Valkyrie sitting there waiting 

“ Sadly I have to return home I have a meeting in the next two hour “ Lotor said annoyed 

“ That suck” Jay said 

“ It dose but like you said. If I’m not the one doing it some one might get it wrong. Did I say that right ?”  Lotor asked 

“ Yes you did bud “  Jay said laughing a little  

“  Is it time to go my Pilot “  VAl said as she walked toward jay.” Oh hello Emperor Lotor It is nice to see you “  

“ it is good to see you too Val. “ Lotor said 

“ It’s Good to see you as well Is Ragna with you I wish to speak to him about something important?” Val asked 

“Sadly no he is currently Help Acxe in looking for the missing paladins But when I see him again I will tell him that you wish to spoke with him.”  Lotor said as he started walking back towards the ship he came in 

“Thank you and have fun at your meeting “  Val said as jay disappear into her mouth 

“ I’ll try” Lotor said as the Valkyrie started to talk off

The flight home was always a beauty to watch as the twin suns of Hades-4 started to set behind the massive mountain range that surrounded the city of Persephone. It was nice to look at the city below him as they passed by the mountain range  . As they flow out of the city the sight of a massive forest came into view an as they flow over it the sky turned from a dark green to a dark blue starry sky. it was a beautiful sight to and was one  reason he choose this planet as his new home. But the main reason he choose this world was the fact that it was close to the milky way so just in case someone tried to invade it and the school system here was good  for the kid so it was a win/win.

A smile creeped across jays face as the sight of a familiar mountain with a small town in the make at the foot of it. The town didn’t look like much but it was a nice place to start fresh and raise a family. It really helped Jay coup when the others when missing. As the Valkyrie got closer to the town he saw people walking down the street. Some stopped to look up and wave to him. he continued to fly over the town until he go a two story house that was next to a small pond as well as a hanger as they landed near the hanger jay got off Val as she opened the door to her hanger. As Jay was walking back to his house hands in his pockets. He notices that some one was sitting on the front step of the porch. As he got closer to the house he saw Fitz Sitting there talking to someone on his phone 

“ Yeah next week it will be fun just you and me at the festival” Fitz had a smile on his face unaware that his Dad was standing there watching him just out side of the porch light’s reach  .” Yeah I just need to ask my dad “ 

“ Ask me what Fitzy “ Jay said as his cheek marks started to glow  along with his eyes as he stepped into the light 

Fitz screamed at the sudden appearance of his dad “   Hi Dad “

“ Hi Fitz how was your day at school and who are you talking too”  JAy asked as he sat down next to his son

“ It was alright I mean it’s school what is going to happen and i’m taking to Axton “ Fitz put his phone on speaker “ Say hi Axton “

{ Hello Mr. Sorin } a female voice said over the phone 

“ Hello Ms.Mercer exactly what are you and my son plan on doing at this on coming school festival ?” Jay asked looking at His son as their face started to turn a bright shade of green 

{ UUUUHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH nothing we were just going to hang out and play some games right Fitz “  Axton said trying but failing to hide her  embarrassment 

“ Yeah we just going to play some games and ride some rides” Fitz said still blush

“ Alright if that’s all then yes Fitz you can go just be home before midnight “ Jay said as he got up from the stair he was sitting on  and walked to the front door and before opening it jay turned back to look at his son “ And no funny business “ Jay then opened the front door and walked into the house followed by jay yelling “ I’m home” Jay walked into the living room 

“ Hello father” Bastion 

“ Hi dad” Usamu said  

Jay turned to see his other two son both sitting on the couch  Bastion was watching something on the tv while Usamu was drawing in his sketch book

“ Hey kiddos how was school.?” Jay said 

“ Same old same old  “ Usamu  said not looking away from sketch book

“ I punched a guy in the throat because he was picking on some kid in a whee chair “ 

“ First off that not good don’t punch people second of did you get caught punching this guy “ Jay asked 

“ No I punched then ran into the car and then Ezra drove off before anyone could see me “

“ Good to know and good on you for punching him and standing up for that kid. Now don’t do that again . Because I don’t want to hear Mrs. Henbit yelling at the next pta meeting about how her precious baby watched two kids beating the shit out of each other or some other stupid shit she’ll bitch about.”  Jay said annoyed as in the back of his mind he could hear the screech of henbit “ Now what do you guys want for dinner tonight?” Jay asked 

“ Ezra order pizza and took Molly and Clay with them to get it” Bastion said 

“Alright then” Jay walked over to the couch “ what we watching today”  Jay said then he sat down between his two sons and final started to relax from along days work.

[ladyemberswrites]

"A Touch Is All I Ask"

-

Summary: Basically, an Au of Au wherein an accident Lotor ends up traveling through the rift only for him to met and fall in love with Allura from another reality, but because life refuses to give him a break the rift creatures destroy both that Allura and her reality along with her leaving Lotor to travel the rift for centuries trying to find his way back home. Fortunately, he ends of being saved the Princess Allura from his reality. Which makes things all the more awkward as Lotor has to force himself to differentiate between this Allura and the Allura he had loved. The plot only thickens once Allura starts to develop feelings for him as she nurses him back to health.

Rating: T and Up

Words: 2k

Chapters: 1/?

-

He had lost everything in a single fleeting moment. A breath, a heartbeat, and soon nothingness consumed him. It ate away at the flesh and the bone, and pierced his dreaded, cold heart. His fingers reached for nothing, tiny cosmos, stars that have already long passed, and they bleed through his fingers. His fingers, these hands that have done nothing but bring about horrors, that only bring about destruction. Perhaps they were right, he is a curse. A blight on the world, a filthy obstruction. He felt the world around him drown, his body as heavy as lead and as weightless as a cloud. In space-time is obsolete. His mind and memories fragmented, and the voices that haunt him whisper in his ears in continual repeat.

The rift is relentless, a cruel, twisted mistress. An abomination, an unknown horror and they like a siren singing sailors to their deaths upon the steep rocks sing to him too as he wanders, and he drifts to nowhere. Howling, and lulling sweet tunes that fill the silence of his travels where there is nowhere and no one, and as the presumed days go by they fill the aching silence. He‘s long tuned them out-but-

~Lotor~ their eyes are amber like hers. Their hair a dark silver like hers had once been. Though, he had never heard her voice, he assumes that must have been what she sounded like. But, he knows that they aren’t his mother. Their image of her is picture perfect, not a single detail missed, but he knows. He’s no fool. He knows their games he knows their lies. They hiss when he pays the cheap imitation no mind, growling, and sneering.

~How dare you!~ they screech in union, a kaleidoscope of dissonant voices. His ears run red when the shrieking refuses to come to an end, but again he disregards them and simply keeps going, he keeps moving because he does not know when to give up. Because death is too easy, no matter how tempting it is to just collapse and sleep an endless dream. But, dreams offer him no repute, no reprieve instead they are nothing more than a reflection-a mirror world-a gateway to his own insanity. There is no peace. So, he must walk even though there is nothing.

~ 

“That's absolutely disgusting, Lance!” Pidge grimaces, her nose wrinkles as she spat out her tongue.

“Yeah, well, try actually being there and seeing it in person" he leans into her, his shoulder, bony and sharp, cuts into her side "let me tell ya, that changes a man" 

“Just because you experienced it, doesn't mean I want to hear it” Pidge mutters into her palm "and can't you sit on your side of the ship?" she shoves him.

He brushes aside her last comment making himself comfortable “I thought we were friends, Pidge? Besides you who else do I have in this big lonely castle?" 

"Why can't you bother, Hunk for a change" the girl surfs her screens in boredom.

"I would, but he's been too busy with his new girl-friend" he emphasizes his point by making quotation marks with his fingers "to hang out anymore-I mean whatever happened to the bro-code!?" 

Pidge rolls her eyes "so, what? He can become a lonely, desperate misogynist, womanizing jerkhole?"

"I prefer the term lover man, Pidge" 

"I think you missed the entire point of that statement..nevermind-the point being is that there are other men on the ship you could socialize with" 

"I rather get stabbed in the spleen again than hang out with Keith out of my own volition" 

"I wasn't talking about, Keith." 

"Shiro's way too serious to do anything fun with. It's all Lance stop. Lance your drinking way too much. Lance you can't spike people's drinks. Shiro's awesome and all, but he doesn't have a single fun bone in his body" 

"I don't think perpetuating liver damage is something I would personally consider fun" 

"It's not about the drinks, the drinks are just secondary, where there's alcohol there's hot women, come on get with the program Pidge"

"Shiro's gay" 

"I was gonna hook him up" 

"With a dude?" She rose a dry brow. 

"Of course a dude, unless he goes both ways, I can get him both" 

"...Y'know it's a wonder why your single?"

"Is that sarcasm?" 

"What about Coran" she dodges the question " he's a guy"

"Coran's fun-until he goes overboard. Y'know like the time he nearly killed us"

"That was your own fault y'know"

"How was I supposed to know pot would drive him into a murderous rampage-" The hiss and beep of the bridge door interrupts him. Hunched and bleary eyed, Allura wanders onboard in a complete daze, her heels clicking against the paneled walkway. Her characteristic bun hung lopsidedly off the side of her head, her ends frazzled and uncombed. Her eyes sunken with dark bruises and her favorite white jacket hangs haphazardly off her one shoulder.

Lance whistled “Boy, you look awful, Princess-or is that a new look your aiming for” 

Allura snaps her head towards him with lethal speed,  barely restraining the urge to strangle him 

“I’m far too tired to deal with your nonsense this morning, so please do shut up unless you’d like be placed on toilet duty again” 

The threat hangs in the air for a few minutes before Lance snorts, brushing her off awhile tugging at the hem of his turtleneck sweater in a nervous bout “Y-yeah, but no thanks, Princess, I've cleaned enough toilets and vomit to last me a lifetime" 

Allura didn’t bother to comment but casts him one last warning glare before turning back to the teleduv, reaching out she taps it lightly bringing the ship's screens to life. The skies were all clear except for a bach of asteroids floating in the distance, but to her relief so far no enemy ships or anything remotely suspicious, as they travel the cosmos to Planet Greta off hidden on another less known side of the galaxy.

Even so, she didn't wish to take any chances and made sure to double check her assessment, while ignoring Pidge and Lance's continued conversation  Bits and pieces dribble into the forefront of her thoughts here and there, but there's nothing she can make sense of being that the topic relates back to Earth. 

Her checks repeat nothing new-Sighing, she cuts the feed to rub her face in annoyance. Everything hurt. Her body aches in a way that's more aggravating than truly painful. But, sleep has been hard to come by lately, the moment she closes her eyes-the nightmares began again. Her father’s blood upon her hands, splattered upon the blue silk of her gown, the sight of his mangled corpse lying at Zarkon’s iron boots. His face darkened, indistinguishable from the other bodies that littered the marble floors-

 She clenches her fingers listlessly fearing that if she didn’t pay attention she’d find his blood on them again.  Her skin burned, having spent the night trying to scrub the red away. Now, they just itch, the skin of her hands rubbed raw and dry. And yet, there's that lingering feeling of wetness  that she just can't shake, despite knowing that it isn't there. Yet, she kept scratching her wrist as she stared out over the bridge watching nothing but stars pass them by.

“Lura?” she didn’t hear Pidge pace up to her. She turns in the girl's direction “you okay there? You’ve got that dead look in your eyes again?” 

“I’m fine, Pidge. Don’t worry” she wonders if her voice always sounded hoarse, or is it just her, and she’s hearing things again. Whatever the case she just shakes her head attempting to ignore it. That and the throbbing headache that pounds at the back of her skull.

“If you say so….” Pidge didn't  know what else to say or do other than offer the woman her space, and awkwardly returns to her seat.

"What's her problem?" Lance whispers.

"....I don't know. She looks sick-"

"She's not going to pass out again is she because-"

Perhaps, it’s time to give up and ask Doctor Alibhe for some sleep aid? Her nose wrinkles at the prospect, but what else can she do. She's tried everything: training until she's exhausted to the bone. Meditation only abandons her to her own traitorous thoughts which only leads to exasperation and a wish to lobotomize herself. So, no that was a no go. She's tried tea, acupuncture, oil massage. Worse case scenario, well, partially out of desperation a chiropractor who only charged her an exuberant amount of money and a nasty crick in her neck that took weeks to go away. Trial or error aside, she can't continue like this; people will notice, people are already noticing, if it keeps going the questions will never end. Pressing a fist to her brow, she huffs-if only the night didn't dreg up past horrors-

*Ping*

*Ping* 

Her temples throb, cracking her eyes back open Allura finds herself thrown from her musings back to reality. The pinging of the teleduv continues causing her to pause and blink for a moment flicking the scanners back on.

"What?” out of bloody nowhere something pops up upon the monitors signaling a disturbance in the area. Brows tightly pinched together, she didn't see any ships-

“Enemy ship?” Lance asks in a brief moment of seriousness. Both his and Pidge's eyes dart from her to the screens above, bracing themselves for impact.

“It’s-" she squints "no” she shakes her head 

“whatever it is-it’s far too small to be a ship-it’s-oh, 

no” her heart plummets to the pit of her stomach. 

“Oh, no what?” 

“It’s another rift opening….” 

“Well,  that's just flipping fantastic!” Lance barks “More rift creatures! Is it bad that I rather deal with Sendak, heck even Zarkon himself any day over dealing with those walking-talking living embodiments of nightmare fuel!” 

Allura swallows dryly. A lovely start to already dreary day-oh, stars, she's not sure how much more she can take of this insanity.

~ 

“Maybe we’ve been blessed by the Altean space gods!” Lance cries to the heavens “because I don’t see a single thing or y’know I'm not vomiting up my own entrails”

“Not if you don’t jinx us” Keith snaps. As quickly as it had come the rift had immediately snapped shut. Yet, no creatures of the rift made it out through the small opening. No horrifying illusions or imagery, just nothing. Just dead-end silence that did little to comfort her as she stares out among the stars and the blackness of space.

In their rush they took their respective lions on ahead with Allura placing Head Commander Hira at the helm and with the ship on high alert. When nothing assaulted them, Shiro suggested they take a look around by hand. Jetpacks loaded with full and pistols set on lethal everyone disembarked only to greeted by nothing. 

Allura worries her bottom lip out of nervousness, she’s only glad that she hadn’t eaten anything for breakfast or else she would have vomited in her own helmet. Holding her pistol close, she prepares herself for anything by as the minutes trickle on by, besides the cluster of  asteroids, nothing bizarre happens. An hour of searching and checking and rechecking the area's clear of any  potential danger.

“I’m starting to think it was a false alarm, Princess” Keith calls out to her. 

“Yeah, I’ve got nothing. Nada , zilch” Hunk tapped his scanner “besides the glitchy connection, I don’t see anything out of the ordinary” 

“Me neither” Pidge mutters “it’s all just empty space as far as the eye can see.” 

“Same here” Shiro adds, perplexed.

“Same with my end” Matt floats back to them “looked all over those asteroids over there, but like Hunk said zilch. Nada.” 

“Perhaps, something was trying to get out, but couldn’t” Hunk states with an uneasy hitch in his voice. 

It isn't unlikely, and it's probably the case, too. Though that does beg the question-if something were trying to claw its way out the rift what stopped it? Allura isn’t sure if she wants to find out.

“Hunk’s probably right” Allura agrees quietly, holstering her pistol “we should probably head back to the Lions. Oxygen's running low.” They weren't that far from the castle ship, but it's still a pretty good distance even with the lions.

"About time! This place gives me the creeps" 

"Second that-"

“...more like it was a waste of time…” everyone moves on ahead of her as she can't help but linger, taking one more glance over her shoulder she scans her surroundings. It's times like these that remind her how vast the galaxy is. Enormous and all consuming like a sea with no bottom, no end. Left could right, and right, left. Shoving down the existential dread, she moves to to turn and head back until a twinkling light catches the corner of her eye. Stopping, she swivels back to look again-this time the twinkling is hard to miss, she squints, it isn't a star, as the source of the glittering is a top an asteroid closest to her. With bated breath she slowly, carefully maneuvers herself over to it. It's rocky texture is rough, the cold seeping through her gloves. With a grunt she heaves herself upwards, her thoughts oddly quiet as she focuses on climbing and hauling her weight until she reaches the top. Heaving enough to cloud the glass of her helmet, she stills to inhale a deep breath before she decides to lift her head up and freezes-

A massive body is collapsed upon the mountainous structure.

It-can't be-

Galra?

Hesitantly, she crawls towards him on all fours both curiosity and fear churning in her gut. Carefully, she reached over to quickly tap his shoulder to snap it away fearing a swipe of his large hand. Or a lunge. Squeezing her eyes shut she expects the worst, but when nothing came she instead hears a low, pained groan.So, low that if it weren't for her being so close she probably wouldn't have heard him. Placing a hand to calm her erratic heart, Allura steadies herself before gently extending both her hands to flip him on to his back, however it isn't without some difficulty. He's super heavy. With a grunt she manages and once he's on his back she's met with a rather gorgeous face, but unfortunately one she did not recognize. Examining his body, his armor is old. Eroded with rust and dented all over with the color of it faded. His face as handsome as it is, is marred with bruises painted black and dark blue, and dried blood dribbles down his obviously split lip. Yet, strangely enough she didn't find anything indicating his rank. No badge or medallion, no even a family crest holding his cape together. There's a satchel hung around his waist, but it wouldn't be wise to open it out here. He definitely looks the part of a high ranking galra general, but that begs the question, if he is, what is a seemingly distinguished general doing out here in the middle of an asteroid field? Did someone dump him out here?

Frantically her eyes dart around- but, she was so sure she hadn't detected a galra ship in the area-

Breathing heavily, she only finds emptiness. 

-unless-

Her eyes fall back to him-the rift.  Her eyes widen as she eyed him closer now noticing the markings on his face, a telltale sign of quintessence exposure. They weren't too bad, but it isn't something that can be ignored without consequence. Frightened out of her mind, she shouts back to her team over her shoulder.

 “I found something!” drawing all eyes to her. I've definitely found something; she whispers to herself.

[lygerastia]

cheiloproclitic (Klance)

Summary: Pining Keith just looooves Lance's lips.

Warnings: none.

Chapters: 1 [completed] 

Words: 3,459

READ IT ON AO3. 

**

Lance is rambling again, much to everyone’s annoyance. Something about uh…their last mission, when the team fought Lotor’s crew and got their ass handed to them. Keith has no idea what he’s talking about—words seem to pass over his head as he toys with his blade, twirling it distractedly. Shiro probably would’ve scolded him if he saw how careless Keith was with the knife; but Shiro was in the room, resting. Keith was glad he had the man back in the team; at least he wasn’t going to be forced to lead again, despite getting slightly used to it. He was going to miss that—but his feelings need to be pushed aside for the moment. He still had the Black Lion to learn to live with. And that was no easy feat. It was different from Red, who he has formed a bond with over time. He still couldn’t believe that he has been chosen as the leader—was he up for it? He wanted to believe so. He wanted to think that he was capable of leading the team and earn their trust.

He wanted to prove himself.

“…”

Keith stares blankly at the knife: another one of his problems. His own identity, the Galra blood that was a part of him…He didn’t want to think about that right now. He didn’t want to think about all of these problems at all. He wanted to be as relaxed as the others, as charming and goofy as Lance. Thinking of Lance, his hues focus on the tall, lanky boy who was still gesticulating and making laser sound effects. Playful, as always. Keith knew better. After that private moment between them, when Lance sought out reassurance from him, things changed. The Red paladin never expected that to happen; it…shook something inside of Keith. No one ever came to him for advice; and yet Lance did. The one that hated his guts a while ago.

Keith…admired Lance. Sometimes, he even wanted to tell him that. But he was afraid of his reaction. Was Keith in the position of praising Lance? He had no idea how to react and, in consequence, his own feelings continued to bloom. He didn’t mind getting closer to the ex-Blue paladin. How many times has he wished for that to happen, to learn what it is to have a friend there for you, to let someone in behind his walls and not fear that they’ll leave him. He wanted to trust someone; he didn’t want to be lonely anymore.

Keith craved for affection and desired to feel more..

He shivers and wipes his eyes, trying to hide the incoming of his tears. He said he wouldn’t cry. And that’s what he’s going to do. He has to focus here. The dark haired boy puts his knife away and sinks back into the couch, crossing his arms over his chest. He didn’t wanted to sulk, so he gives an attempt to listen to what Lance was talking about, although he has heard it countless times before. Lance liked bragging about how he shot all of the guards back there with deadly accuracy—Keith had to admit that that was impressive. Saved his life even. There was no doubt that shooting was Lance’s forte, though it seems the boy in question never seems to acknowledge that. He always sought out validation, a thing Keith couldn’t really understand. Lance should know he was good. Extraordinary. Sometimes, Keith wanted to be as skilled as Lance was. And it was a darn shame Lance couldn’t see himself through Keith’s blue ones.

Lance was handsome. Lance was funny as well as incredibly annoying when he shouldn’t be. But the times when he was serious clearly showed how dedicated and loyal he was for the cause. How he would set aside his pride for the greater good; and how much of a fool he was for not believing that he was a valuable asset for the team. Involuntarily, he cheered everyone up—Keith can’t see the castle without Lance’s loud mouth and arrogant attitude that hid his true character inside.

Keith noticed a lot of things about Lance lately…How, when he was upset with a decision, he kept his opinion for himself and stuffed his hands in his pockets. How smart and clever he could be when it came to strategy and thinking of what the team needs best. No one really seems to appreciate that—maybe Keith had those moments too, but…he learned the truth. How Lance was Keith’s impulse control and how he managed to make him change his mind when it came to jeopardizing the team’s safety. Lance was the perfect right hand for Keith—and Keith, to a certain degree, trusted him. They made a good team. They…

When did this started...?

When did the broody and aloof currently Black Paladin started to think of his teammate like this? He stared at him countless times but only recently he noticed how handsome Lance was. How fluffy his brown hair was and how often did he wanted to ruffle it, to touch it. He never had that impulse before, but now it was more obvious. Keith found out that whenever Lancey Lance smiled, he’d involuntarily smile to himself; a little one, barely visible, but it was there. Without a doubt. And Keith also noticed that his gaze softened when he was looking at the aforementioned boy. And how his pulse quickened. How his cheeks reddened when Lance ‘flirted’ with him or addressed him some words. How good Lance looked in his costume, at that tight ass, or how he peeked at his naked torso when he was changing. That was his secret—observing has become a habit, and he prayed to God that Lance didn’t notice. But oh, so many dirty thoughts crossed his mind in that moment, a thing he didn’t personally think he’d be capable of. It was… a new experience that Keith carefully examined and threaded on with extra caution. He didn’t want to fall too hard into Lance’s trap. What if he read all these signs wrongly?

What happened to him? Feelings weren't his forte.

Keith did not want to think too deeply about what he was feeling towards the other. Maybe it was wrong, but it felt so right.

It was undeniable that Keith had a crush on the sharpshooter. He could figure that out by himself.

Those beautiful blue orbs of Lance’s suddenly stop onto Keith’s and Keith jumps in surprise. Maybe he was too focused onto his internal battles and was too obvious about his attraction. He hoped not. He really did not want everyone to know. Although his heart kept telling him that it was ok to be expressive, that it wasn’t wrong. But damn, how could Keith do that without accidentally fucking things up? He had no idea. He decided to just wait it out and works things out. Because he has been pining on Lance for a long time without really realizing what he was feeling. Those constant jabs at him; he now knew why.

It was all clear—and oh boy he was in deep.

Lance smiles in Keith’s direction; and his heart skips a beat. “Are you listening to me, Keith?” he asks in that goofy tone of voice of his, that was very endearing to Keith’s ears.

“Mmmhhm..” Keith is only capable of letting out a hum, not trusting his voice. He felt too many emotions to believe his voice wouldn’t crack.

It makes Lance grin brightly and he completely turns his body towards Keith. His body tenses immediately and he straightens a little since he had Lance’s full attention on him. He was going to start babbling again and Keith had the task to listen.

“I’m at that part where I so brilliantly shot the enemy that was about to overwhelm you, Keith!” Keith remembered that moment. Ok, he was slightly frustrated by that. Maybe he wanted to impress Lance this time around. But oh well, he had to live like this.

“Yeah, thanks for having my back out there,” Keith compliments Lance and he’s pleased to see how he visibly flusters and tries to keep his smile in control. He glances to the side, acting nonchalant about it. At least Keith was a good actor when it was needed.

“Uhh yeah, no problem, buddy!” he says, kind of proud. “But have you seen it, guys?” he suddenly addresses the others, though his body was still focused on Keith.

“No, not re—“ Hunk starts to answer, but it is interrupted by Lance.

“Then let me recapitulate!” And he starts on talking and talking, again, gesticulating and making cute sounds. Keith sighs dreamily, but he quickly hides it under that cool ‘I’m a bad boy’ façade. He keeps his eyes trained on Lance’s face, though his attention was captured by Lance’s lips.

Oh, Keith learned the hard way that he liked Lance’s lips the most. They were attractive and had a rosy hue to them that seemed to glisten in the light, attracting him. When did he start wanting to kiss Lance? Since forever, maybe. I mean, his lips moved so darn much that it was impossible to focus on something else.

Keith only noticed on a mission when they had to infiltrate a Galra base. While they fucked up the stealthy mission and riled the guards up, Keith knew that they had to hide somewhere. When he saw the opportunity, when he saw that crack, he reacted immediately and, grabbing Lance’s arm, he pulled him in the confines of that gap. They barely fit—Keith has no idea how he could think that they’d actually squeeze in there. But they did; they were pretty skinny after all. It was the perfect hideout: dark and deep enough—luckily for Keith, Lance did not hesitate on following his lead, without questioning it.

“Keep quiet,” Keith hissed in a whisper at Lance, confused as to whether he liked the position they were in or not. It was a necessary yet compromising if one of their teammates were to discover that; which was highly unlikely. They were somehow sitting face to face, their chest barely touching one another. Lance was taller than Keith (not by much, mind you! Tell Keith he’s short and he’ll flip you over) and the small space had him lean above Keith, resting his palms on the wall above Keith’s head. In that moment, the dark haired boy hoped that Lance wouldn’t hear his booming heart flutters or feel the heat radiating off his face at the sudden closeness. Even if he planned this, it wouldn’t have ended so perfectly like this. It made Keith self-conscious of his feelings but at the same time, he liked being able to feel Lance like this. He tried hard to avoid looking directly into Lance’s eyes and glanced to the side, pretending he was listening to the footsteps outside. He could hear them, faintly in the distance—but it slipped out of his mind the moment he noticed Lance’s hot breath above his face. He flushed, he couldn’t help himself. And clenched his fists that were to his side, trying hard to control himself to not put his palms onto Lance’s chest.

His breathing started to grow erratic—this was bad. This was very bad. He wouldn’t be able to control his impulses.

“Are they gone?” Lance whispers close to his ear and Keith’s breath hitches in his throat. Fuck, fuck, fuck. Really, this was fucked up.

“Shh, listen,” Keith snaps, hiding his nervousness. Lance sighs and glances to where they came from. And suddenly, they both hear it. The heavy footsteps of the Galra soldiers running, their voices shouting ‘Look for the two paladins! Capture them!’ Keith’s hand was on his knife, ready to fight were to be discovered. He felt sweat forming on his brow from both the tension of the chase and the hot atmosphere he felt around the Blue paladin. They waited, tensed and poised to attack—but the group of soldiers passed alongside the crack without even paying attention to their hideout. When the sounds faded away, they let out a breath of relief and their bodies visibly relaxed.

“Ok, I think we can go out—“ Keith started but stopped as soon as he turned his head towards Lance. “—n-now…” He hated himself for letting his voice falter. But could you blame him? Lance relaxed too quickly and he was now resting above Keith on his elbows, gradually getting even closer to Keith’s face. If Keith craned his neck a little bit more and stood on his tiptoes, he could easily kiss Lance. They were basically…Keith couldn’t explain this feeling. “I—I uh..”

Lance only looked at him confused, even daring to cock his head to the side cutely. “They’re gone, Keith.” He states, matter-of-factly. But Keith’s mind was not processing facts any longer. His eyes stared into Lance’s blue ones, getting lost in them. It felt as if he was swimming in them and he was getting lost in the ocean of them; more like drowning. It was a dreadful feeling—he was remaining without air at the sight. Dammit, Kogane, compose yourself. “Keith…? Buddy?” Lance’s voice was worried yet dangerously low. “Are you ok?”

Keith’s face was redder than his suit. What should he say?

“Why are you staring at me like that…?” Lance was self-conscious of the staring and a light blush painted his tanned cheeks. And he had a very sexy voice… “Keith…” This time, it sounded like a moan and Keith reacted accordingly.

Without remorse, he grabbed Lance’s collar and held him there, frowning at what he was about to do. His eyes kept darting towards the Cuban’s lips: it was the first time he actually saw them. In the dim light of the ship, they glowed with intense temptation, so healthy and well-kept. As opposed to Keith’s own lips, which were naturally soft yet his uncaring attitude left them chapped and unattractive. He licked them to make them more appealing, although the main attraction was Lance’s mouth. Slightly parted from the surprise and trembling with desire, Keith hoped. Lance looked scared, yet oddly into it. Keith’s heart beat even faster as he started to get on his tiptoes, closing his eyes. Was he really going to do this?! Was he really going to kiss the Lance McLain? He couldn’t possibly…And yet he felt Lance’s hands going down to his hair, resting there and petting his head. What the hell was Lance doing anyway? He was reacting to Keith—did that mean he also felt the same way he did?

No way..

But the wish was there, floating between them. In the way Lance’s fingers brushed against Keith’s dark lush locks and how, during the initial relaxation, Lance’s knee was in between Keith’s legs, almost touching him. Keith felt like grinding against it, just to feel Lance closer, to observe what his reaction would be to that. Would it feel right? Or would it be extremely wrong? Keith was tempted. There was nothing he could do to quench his thirst and feed the hunger he felt in that moment for the tanned Blue paladin. His eyes shone so beautifully…What did Keith do to deserve this? Just a little thrust of his hips, a bit of rotation of his lower half and he’d be…

“K-Keith…” the way Lance said his name, Keith would never forget. How soft it sounded and how vulnerable it made Lance look. It made Keith’s blood boil and his instincts kicked in: he simply wanted to ravage the boy senseless. It should be illegal to be this adorable and sexy at the same time.

He leaned in closer, taking the lead. Lance slowly closed his eyes, wearing a deeply conflicted expression but at the same time—

“Urghhh…” Keith moaned in his palms, covering his face at the memory. They didn’t kiss, though—but the thought was now vivid in his mind. They were interrupted at the right time and parted as if they were about to do something forbidden. It took a while before they could look into each other’s eyes again without feeling ashamed about what they were about to do back then. Other things took their mind off of it and now they forgot about it. At least Lance did. Keith couldn’t. Lance’s mouth was constantly attracting his attention, no matter what. When they curled into that mischievous and perverted grin; whenever he ate something and some crumbs remained latched there—he wanted to lick them off. Lance was so clumsy and oblivious. Keith liked that, sort of. He wondered more often than not how his lips tasted. And it killed him…

This was so fruitless…

“Keith, buddy?” He feels Lance’s hand on his shoulder and he quickly lifts his head, almost bumping into Lance’s big forehead. They were in the exact same position as before and both their faces flare up in embarrassment. But neither moves from their spot, assuming their position. Lance clears his throat, trying hard to keep eye contact. “You—You feeling alright? You were kinda spacing out there…”

Keith wants to die. To disappear off this planet because he’s feeling the urge to kiss Lance right then and there, in front of everyone. But he can’t afford to do that. His lips were so close; not much separated them and hot breath was tantalizing against his own mouth. Just a bit more and..

“Keith, you’re all red.” Lance puts his hand on the other boy’s forehead and Keith flinches. “You’re burning and—wait, why are you staring at my mouth like that?” The sentence makes Keith gulp: he was caught. “Do I have something on it?” Again, clueless Lance strikes again. Fortunately for the Red paladin. How could he explain what he was feeling? He couldn’t. He himself had no idea what he was feeling. All that he knew was…that he was disastrously attracted to that pair of lips.

“I—I—Lance, I was just th-thinking.” And so, the boy pushes Lance’s hand away, averting his gaze. “It’s nothing.”

“Thinking about what?” And, as always, the inquisitive and curious Lance came out in the open. “Keith, don’t avoid me!”

Red in the face, Keith couldn’t contain his feelings any longer and he stood up, bursting “K-Kissing! I was thinking about kissing, ok?! Now leave me!”

Lance only blinked in confusion. “Kiss who?”

“Y-Y…” Keith gulped. He couldn’t say it. He wanted to. But he couldn’t. he lifted his head and pleaded Lance with his eyes to get the picture. Lance softly gasped, taken by surprise by Keith’s expression—and he involuntarily blushed.

“K-Keith…?” Lance mumbled in that deep low voice of his. “Who.” He was serious; he really wanted to know now.

“Yo—Lips.” Keith blurted out, at a loss. What the fuck was he saying?

“Lips?”

“Yours—uhhh, you have umm, nice…lips?” Lance barely heard him and he leaned towards him. Keith only seemed to shrunk under the gaze.

“My…what?”

It was now or never. “I am attracted to lips, ok?!” And, with that statement, he pushes past the taller boy and runs out of there. “I’m going to train!”

“Wait, Keith—He’s gone…” Lance calls after the boy then sighs in frustration, running a hand through his locks. “What’s with that guy?” Lance had no idea what Keith referred to, but it bothered him. What was all the tension he felt whenever he was around Keith? It was weird. It felt as if Keith wanted to do something to him, but he had no idea what. Yet he felt as if, without him really wanting to, his mouth gravitated towards Keith’s on its own. What was this sentiment…? He couldn’t be attracted to that bastard. What the hell was wrong with him? “Do you guys have any idea what he was talking about?” he turns to Hunk and Pidge, the ones who have been present to the encounter this whole time, amusing themselves.

Pidge snickers and gives Lance a shit-eating grin. “From my calculations, Keith sounds as if he’s attracted to your lips.” Pidge’s glasses glints with mischief. “I think he reaaaaallly wants to kiss you, Lance.”

Lance takes a while to process that in his mind; and when he does, his brain completely explodes. As well as his face, which is red as a tomato. “WHAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAT?!” he cries out in despair, but entirely pleased by this information. “I—I need to cool down a little bit…” And he wobbles out of there, feeling faint.

What is he going to do with this information now?

–

[masterlist]

[dent-de-leon]

Anyway Lance also got some pretty good solid development in season 6?? I mean, just off the top of my head you’ve got:

Lance literally sacrificing himself to save Allura, that’s like?? Some prime heroism right there?? He saw that she was in danger and he put his life on the line, that’s huge. See also: how Allura cries for him, how she refuses to accept the fact that he may be gone, how she cradles him in her arms and stares at him so sweetly afterwards, ect. There’s a genuine connection there, and it’s been building for quite a few seasons now. 

Lance legitimately completely getting over his playboy phase--something everyone wanted--and acknowledging that his feelings for Allura were so much deeper and real. Even better, he never tells Allura, he never burdens her with his feelings to guilt her or make her uncomfortable. He instead acknowleges that she liked Lotor and instead tries to work through his own (supposedly unrequited) feelings in a very healthy way. 

And, above all else, he literally says his love for Allura makes him “want to be a better person.” That’s literally such a turnaround and easily some of the best character development he’s ever gotten. 

Lance seeing M&M as just a “nerd game” but then giving it a chance and actually having tons of fun with the character, which also leads to him having a genuinely good time. We get to see some more of Lance’s creativity with how he gets into character and loves acting (reminds me a bit of how his comic is narrated from his perspective as like this high fantasy adventure). At the end, he says to Allura, “We have a lot of fun together, don’t we?” And she happily agrees

Lance is the first one to tell Romelle that they can’t just open fire on Lotor’s ship because Allura’s on board and he’s not about to let her get hurt. 

When Lotor and Allura come back from their trip to the rift, Lance is the only paladin that pulls his bayard on them. It’s just Keith, Krolia, and then Lance that have their weapons at the ready. “Allura, step away from Lotor.” She gets understandably upset with him, but he does it because he knows her safety is at risk and he feels it’s the best option for her. 

You can tell Lance looks really concerned for Shiro when he’s being taken over by Haggar and tries to fight it. He’s also the one that regains his footing first and delegates orders--which the team immediates follows, “Allura and I will secure Lotor. Hunk, help Shiro. Everyone else, get down to the hanger and stop those guys.” 

Lance is also the only paladin with his bayard out at the time, and even when Shiro attacks him, he doesn’t fight back, and instead asks what’s going on--he knew Shiro was obviously going through something very bad and didn’t try to hurt him. 

Doesn’t question Keith’s leadership like he did in earlier seasons. Like, as soon as Keith asks if they’re ready to go, Lance’s response is just, “We’ve got this.” He puts his very immature one-sided rivalry aside and understands that, yes, Keith is a good leader, and he’s willing to accept that and follow him. 

This isn’t season 3 Lance very callously and maliciously accusing Keith of using the loss of his best friend to take over the team, or season 4 Lance complaining that Keith is ruining their parades. Like, there’s some very real growth and depth here.

Lance is the one who comforts Allura after everything that went down with Lotor, and he never once tries to make it about himself or uses it as some sort of opportunity to make a move on her. He’s focused enirely on her feelings and validating them, on making sure she knows none of this is her fault and that he’ll always be there for her. 

“Allura, it wasn’t just you who trusted Lotor. We all did.” “Let me tell you, as someone whose made a million mistakes, all you can do is get up and make it right.” Really, that heart to heart was so good and cathartic for her, you can tell by the way she hugs him and thanks him. This is Lance building up his teammates and being someone for them to lean on, and really just sort of living up to the legacy the Blue Lion prepared him for. 

Lance was very viscerally affected by hearing about what happened to Shiro--especially after that moment when he opened up to him in the previous season. At the time, Lance tried to reassure him by convincing him he’d be alright and getting him to try and rest--which isn’t by any means an awful or uncaring thing to do, but he regrets it nonetheless. Even when there wasn’t much more he could have done. 

“He...he tried to tell me, but I didn’t realize. I’m so sorry, Shiro. I--I didn’t know. I could’ve...” Lance cries for Shiro, Lance feels for Shiro, and he’s clearly someone who hates seeing his friends hurt and really takes that to heart. We then have this lovely little moment where Allura reaches out and silently reassues him. It mirrors how he was the one to comfort her when she was crying, and it’s just another subtle thing that hints at how their relationship has really been developing. These two seriously have amazing chemistry and character devlopment together, and it’s one of the highlights of the season. 

So yeah, I really don’t understand this sentiment where people seem to think that season is somehow objectively bad for Lance, or how he just got no content or character development. There was honestly some really solid and well thought out progression for his character, even if it might not neccessarily be what some fans wanted to see--it’s still very much there. 

[braincoins]

“Remember when you ‘saved’ me that first time?” she asked him.

“I can hear the air quotes in there, and I object to them.”

“I was going over the evidence about you being Paladin. That’s why I was so lost in thought.”

“And walked out into traffic, nearly getting hit by a car.”

“I would have been fine. The car might not have been.”

He snorted. “So I showed up to save you right when you were figuring out my identity. Appropriate.”

“When did you follow me?” she wanted to know.

“Oh, uh... it was just before the accident. I was trying to figure out how to tell you I knew but then...” He shrugged.

But her eyes widened. “You’ve known all this time?”

“Well... yeah. I mean, it was only going to get more and more awkward to bring it up. And we were busy crime-fighting, and...”

She groaned. “I still would have appreciated you saying something. After everything I...” She paused. “Um. Before I take that any farther, I feel like there’s something else about me you should know.”

His eyebrows both rose. “I can’t even begin to fathom what further secrets you might have.”

She removed her mask, and then took off the ear caps. “I’m not human,” she said, looking him in the eye. “Coran and I are both from the planet Altea. My father sent us away when I was just a baby to protect me from Altea’s impending destruction.”

He blinked. 

He studied her.

Then he reached out - with his left hand - and slowly traced the shape of her ear. She shivered pleasantly, and bit her lip. He was making sure the ears were real, not... but she couldn’t help reacting a little.

“You are literally out of this world.”

She burst out laughing. “That is your reaction? A bad pun?!”

“I’m sorry, but... it’s all I can think of!” He looked embarrassed as he pulled his hand away. “So is this what you really look like, then?”

“Mostly. Except for my height. I can alter my shape some, and that’s how I look like a normal human most of the time. But I do make myself taller to be Starlight.”

“Incredible.” He shook his head. “And so all of your tech and gadgets are... Altean?” he guessed at the word.

She nodded. “Yes. And we think Dr. King might have gotten her hands on some. Apparently our landing wasn’t as smooth as I thought it was, and there might have been some scattered debris from the crash. Coran cleaned up as best he could, but...”

“He missed some. And Galra found it.” He nodded. “That would make sense.”

“Unfortunately so.” She sighed.

“So, is that it, then? Because I think I have a secret I haven’t shared yet.”

She snorted. “‘Is that it’? That’s all you can say? I’m your editor and also an alien and...”

“...and I love you.”

It was her turn to freeze. She swallowed hard. “Even though I’m Allura?”

His brow furrowed. “Especially because you’re Allura. Why would you ever think otherwise?”

“Well... y-you rejected me.”

“What? When?!”

“When I walked out into traffic the second time. When I was flirting with you while interviewing you.”

“Tha-...? Oh my god, Allura, I thought... I thought you were desperate to get the interview, that you didn’t mean it. I mean, you’re in love with someone else! Why would I...”

“I’m in love with YOU!” she declared. “I always have been!”

“Wait, but you rejected me...”

“I didn’t know you were Paladin then. I turned Paladin down for a kiss because I wanted Shiro. And it was only afterwards that I realized you were the same person!”

“Oh my god, I’m such an idiot.” He fell onto the couch, dropping his mask next to him. “We’re both idiots.”

“I’m afraid so.” She sat next to him again. “But for some reason, I still love you, Mr. Lucky.”

He snorted and then laughed again.

“So... you love me as Allura, too?”

He turned to her and smiled. “Yeah. I always thought Allura was a knockout, but she - you were my boss, so there was that wall there. Allura was untouchable; Starlight was safe to pursue. Finding out you and Starlight were the same person?” He shook his head ruefully. “I was a goner. Starlight was always incredible, but I didn’t know that much about her. But Allura? Allura is gorgeous and clever and smart and funny and driven and... and...”

“And no longer your boss,” she pointed out. “I told you Lotor had nothing to do with the transfer. I asked the old owners for it before I even knew he was going to buy the paper. The timing was a coincidence. But then you rejected my flirting and I thought you only loved Starlight, and...”

“I’m sorry.” He gathered her into his arms again. “I’m so, so sorry.”

“I am, too,” she whispered. 

There was a very loud throat-clearing from the kitchen. “No hanky-panky on my sofa, please!” Coran’s voice demanded.

She pulled away and was glad to see Shiro was as red-faced as she was. “Uh, perhaps we can talk more about this somewhere else?” 

“My place?” he asked. “I can always get back home, no matter where I am.”

“Sure.” 

“It’ll help if we’re standing.” 

“Oh, right.” She got back to her feet. 

He picked up his mask in his right hand then stood and offered her his left. 

She accepted it and let him pull her in to him. “Are you sure you have the energy to teleport?”

“I... should? But, you know, just in case...”

She leaned in and pressed her lips against his, and this time he responded, wrapping his right arm around her waist, eyes falling closed as he kissed her. She tried to focus on putting all of herself into the kiss again, as she had before, sliding a hand around to the back of his neck and holding onto his waist with the other.

And when she opened her eyes, they were... “Um... is this your bedroom?”

He was blushing. “I’m sorry. I normally end up in my living room. This has never happened before.”

She grinned down at him. “Is someone getting his hopes up?”

“Maaaaaybe a little?” He kissed her again and again and again, then moved to her cheek and over to her ear.

She gasped, tightening her grip on his waist. “Don’t...” She had to pause to catch her breath as he nibbled on her earlobe. “Don’t you think we should take things a little slower?”

“I’ll make you pancakes in the morning,” he said, breath hot against her ear.

“Deal!” she replied before hauling his face back so she could kiss him again.

{Previously in The Adventures of Starlight & Paladin…}

[sasuhinasno1fan]

Strangest way to meet your neighbor

I had a free day today because my class got cancelled but I ended up washing sleeping bags for my job. So sorry this isn't that good. Neighbor

Lance took a bite of the muffin Hunk had left for him after a stress baking session. He’d been going to meet Shay’s family for the first time and he was so nervous. Lance reaped in the rewards because Hunk was fine and he got the pastries as a result. He was set for breakfast and times he felt peckish for snacks for a while. He went to go sprawl out on the couch, maybe build up the motivation to get started with his next project when someone knocked on his door.

Not bothering to look through the peephole, Lance pulled the door open, taking in the person on the other side of the door. He’d seen him around, lived right across the hall with his brother. And despite the cold weather outside, he was wearing shorts and what he guessed was a tank top under his zip-up hoodie.

“Hi?”

“Um hi. I’m Keith, I live across the hall.”

“Yeah, I’ve seen you around. I’m Lance.”

“Nice to meet you. Um, funny thing, I forgot the keys to my apartment and my brother is at a work thing that he won’t be back from in like an hour from and I just came back from the gym. Do you think it’s possible I could borrow your shower so I don’t smell like sweat waiting for him to come back?”

With his pleading expression, Lance couldn’t find it in himself to say no. “Sure. Come on in.”

Lance led Keith to his bathroom and told him he’d get a towel. Part of Lance wondered what he was doing. He never made an effort to go make friends in his building. He’d still been getting over his break-up with his ex at that point and wanted to be alone. Keith was his type in terms of looks but he wasn’t about to go running into another flirting session, not even a one night stand, not while he was still dealing with his ex. He knocked on the bathroom door and opened it at Keith’s answer.

“Here you…go.”

Keith had his back turned to him and Lance’s eyes trailed over the muscles on Keith’s back. He turned to see Lance at the door and Lance got an eyeful of the defined abs. His arms were also a work of art.

“Lance?”

“Huh? Oh, yeah. Um, here you go.” Lance shoved the towel at Keith before closing the door and tried to still his beating heart. God, Keith was really hot. Like really hot. “No, nope, not going there. Lance, do not go there.” He muttered going to grab his laptop. Work would distract him.

He opened his laptop, making sure he had his external hard drive and tablet when his phone buzzed. It was from Allura.

I’m coming over.

Lance let out a sigh, leaning back on the couch. He and Allura dated for a while and the fight that ended their relationship actually almost ended their friendship for good. It made matters worse when he found out Allura started dating Lotor. The asshole’s dad had fired him because Lance stood up for himself, which left Lance struggling to find a job after. He never liked Lotor or his family after that, so he’d been pretty miffed when he found out Allura was dating Lotor. He had listened to Allura sing him praises when he tried to tell her what he’d done. It put a lot of strain on their friendship and made him feel awkward around her. They had adopted a cat together, Blue and now he was about to become a single parent of their fur baby because the apartment Allura was moving into didn’t allow pets.

“Ugg, got a hot guy in my bathroom and my ex coming all in one day. I need headache meds. And my headphones.”

Lance went back to his room and grabbed his headphone and plugged them into his iPod, pressing play and letting the music pull his thoughts from the worries he had.

Because of that he didn’t hear Keith calling for him, didn’t see him exit the bathroom trying to look for him.

“I thought I had another shirt.” Keith muttered to himself as he pulled up his sweatpants that was sliding off his hips. “Where did he go?”

Then someone knocked on the door.

Keith looked around and still seeing no sign of Lance, he decided to just go open the door. On the other side was a woman with long white hair with a man with silver white hair.

“Who are you?” the woman asked, narrowing her eyes at him. “Where’s Lance?”

“Inside? May I help you?”

Just then Lance came out from the hallway and stopped at the sight of Allura and her new boyfriend Lotor.

“Lance who is this?” Allura demanded to know.

“Why does it matter?” Lance asked, going over and pulling Keith away from the door and away from Allura. “It’s my apartment, I can have whoever I want over. Besides, why is he here?”

“Lotor drove me over.”

Lance narrowed his at Lotor. “What was so important that you couldn’t text me?”

“I wanted to tell you you’d have to come get Blue yourself. I thought I’d at least come to see you.”

“Still could have texted me.” Lance said, glaring at Lotor.

“What’s the matter McClain? See something you like?”

“I don’t like snakes.” Lance snapped. “I’ll pick Blue up, don’t worry. Just tell me when.”

Allura hadn’t taken her eyes off of Keith, eyes narrowed untrustingly. “Who are you?”

“Keith, I live across the hall.”

“How long have you been sleeping with Lance?”

“Excuse me?”

“OMG, Allura, will you back off? Look, just go please.” Lance shut the door and groaned in his hands. Forget work, he needed a nap.”

“She’s extremely nosy.” Keith pointed out, as he used the towel to dry his hair.

“I’m so sorry about that. That was my ex and her asshole new boyfriend.”

“No offense, but I think your better off. I hope she doesn’t bother you more because of me being here?”

“It’s fine. I just need a nap.”

Keith took in the stressed face. “Do you have tea? It helped me when I’m stressed.”

“Oh, I couldn’t.”

“It’s the least I can do for letting me use your shower.”

Lance nodded in the end. “In the kitchen, cupboard above the stove.”

“Got it. Hey, but do you have a shirt I could borrow?”

Lance took a quick glance at Keith’s bare chest. “Sorry, I haven’t done laundry yet. Try not to burn yourself.”

Lance felt slightly bad that he was ogling at his half-dressed next door neighbour, but he needed something to keep his mind off what just happened.

“Did you guys share a pet or something? Who’s Blue?” Keith asked as he brought over a cup for Lance.

“Allura and I adopted her. She’s a Savanah cat. After we broke up, we still decided to share her but her boyfriend’s new apartment doesn’t allow pets so she’s gonna be mine.”

“If you want, I can come with you when you need to pick her up.”

“Oh, you really don’t have to.” Lance said.

“I don’t mind. I wouldn’t feel right leaving you to deal with them by yourself.”

Lance took a sip of his tea taking Keith in. they’d just met and here he was offering to put himself under the scrutinization of his ex and her annoying boyfriend. Maybe there was something more to this guy.

“Sure.”

[dammitadolfnomorecake]

Once Bitten, Twice Stupid prt 125

125

A nice big bed. Plenty of soft blankets. A few bags of A+ blood. Lance held plenty of fake hope as he was marched along, well aware that’d he’d gone and got himself kidnapped. There’s been stairs, now things smelt damp, this was definitely a secret lair of some sort and he already hated it. People these days had no respect at all for pregnant people. You accidentally vomit on someone and suddenly your missing half your teeth. He was so stupid as to be intentionally uncooperative. He wasn’t that stupid... well, maybe he was. He’d gotten his arse kidnapped thanks to what was now obviously not a message from Shiro.

Marched along, he kept his mouth shut, playing docile. The fabulous hospitality he’d been shown ending with him literally kicked into some kind of dirty cell, before the grating of clearly metal bars. Fucking idiots. He was a vampire. You know. Stronger than the average human. What were bars supposed to do?! Hissing as his knees scraped on the stone floor, they could have at least taken the stupid bag off his head and untied his hands

“I’m leaving you the worst YELP! review ever! 1 star and a stern warning about your manners!”

The stupid bag was dosed with orange scented... surface spray if he had to hazard a guess. All scents wiped out thanks to “dumb” and “dumber”. Hearing someone moving, he automatically tensed, preparing to lose his head, yet instead, all he lost was the obnoxious bag. Matt, Sam, and Curtis sat together in the corner of the dark room, craning his head up, he tried not to smile at Shiro

“Hey, guys. If you were going to throw a party, you could have invited me the normal way”

Shiro chuckled humourlessly. Lance felt that to his soul. He was going to be in sooooooooo much shit when they got out of here

“We didn’t think we’d be seeing you here. Let me get those restraints off your hands”

“Thanks. They’re really not comfortable, and probably not my colour either”

Crouching down behind him, Shiro started working at the biting restraints. Lance trying not to hiss as the pins and needles sensation in his hands burned

“Does Keith know you’re here?”

“Nope. He went with Coran to pick Rieva up”

“She’s okay?!”

Lance nodded slowly. Matt’s eyes were glowing yellow and he really didn’t want to be turned into Lance paste. He really didn’t appreciate the lingering scent of orange at all. He might just risk scurvy because it’d be along time before he went near an orange again

“Yeah. Everyone’s pretty much like joined up. Pidge is safe, so’s Colleen, and Hunk and Allura”

“Thank fuck for that...”

There was a burning need to question how this had happened, instead that hiss finally escaped as Shiro pulled the restraints of his hands

“Sorry. Matt chewed through ours...”

“Yeah. I feel like Sendak is scraping the barrel with his new hires. No brain cells there at all”

Moving around him, Shiro offered his hand, Lance letting himself be pulled to his feet before half collapsing again Shiro from dizziness and relief. Shiro wrapping his arms around him as if he thought this was an intentional hug

“Did they hurt you?”

“Knocked a few teeth out. Zero respect for the pregnant”

“And they didn’t...”

His face was their punching bag, which he’d be more grateful for if he didn’t have to feel his teeth growing back

“Nope. I’m sorry, but I’m pretty much sure you guys were used to distract everyone so they could kidnap my dumb arse”

Shiro asking

“How did they even get to you?”

“Used your phone. I stupidly went out the front. Douche canoes got me with a tranquilliser or something...”

One moment he’d been up, the next the ground was rushing to say hello

“You should sit, here, take my jacket too...”

Even in a situation like this Shiro was a worrier

“You need it more than I do”

“You’re still in Keith’s sweats. You might not be cold now, but we need to keep your warmth up”

Right. That. This wasn’t exactly a tropical beach... and why were they still in the cell?

“Why haven’t you guys busted out?”

Matt bitterly spat

“Lead and mercy on the bars. Plus they shock you when you touch them”

“Did you try covering your hands?”

“Nah, I thought what’s a little more fucking burn”

Okay. Matt’s ego was dented and his mate hurt. It wasn’t time for Lance’s ego to keep cracking wise arse remarks to hide the fact he was secretly panicking. He could feel he’d let go of it too much. Feel his fear and annoyance feeding its cockiness

“Sorry. Sorry, I’ll just... yeah...”

Shut up is what he needed to do. So he would. He was dumb for thinking they hadn’t already tried to break out.

Shiro sat him a little farther away from the others than he would have liked. Matt’s anger stank so bad that he could taste it instead of smell it. Covering his shoulders with Shiro’s jacket, he pulled his knees up to his chest, burying his face between them. This sucked. This sucked so hard. He’d felt like something was wrong with Shiro’s message but he’d run off instead of calling Keith who hadn’t called him even though he said he would. Lance already knew they wanted him. They’d talked about how he was a valuable sample now the pregnancy was confirmed. Curtis wouldn’t have wanted to talk, but his friend couldn’t help if and it wasn’t fair at all. He wanted to feel angry over it, but they’d definitely said Curtis confirmed he was pregnant. Not told them outright like it was fresh information. He was a goddamn vampire. A sleepy, cranky, ready to blow his lid, vampire... Who didn’t love dark and scary spaces unless he was exploring with his friends.

“Are you okay?”

No. He wasn’t. He was tired and hungry and couldn’t imagine what Keith was going through. Softly he mumbled, trying to deny Shiro sitting next to him made him feel a tiny bit better seeing the man surely had years of experience under his belt and would come up with some amazing plan

“I’m fine... you should go sit with Curtis. I’ll be okay”

“Lance... Keith would...”

Keith would want him to rely on Shiro. To rest and gather as much information on his surrounds, but hearing his boyfriend’s name was too much. He really fucking missed and it’d only been a short time

“Keith was a wreck. He left me at VOLTRON so I’d be safe. Instead I fucked up...”

“Oh, boo hoo. It’s not like he was shot right in front of you”

“Matthew! That’s enough”

Lance whined softly. He deserved that. He only knew what it felt like to be scared shitless in front of someone holding a gun on Keith. Not to see it happen... Sam scolded his son, another whine slipping out as Shiro settled next to him, wrapping his arms around him and pulling him up against him

“We’re obviously going to be here for a while. You should rest”

AKA he should shut up and stop with the pity party. No one wanted to hear it. Not when Matt was worried about Rieva and his father. Mutely he nodded, wondering if the smell of orange was blocking out traces of Keith’s scent on Shiro. Sendak had to have some fucking master plan... Lance kind of wanted to skip punching him in the dick for ripping off his testicles. He was old and he was tired. The bastard ruining his plans... but he also never wanted to set eyes on Sendak again. He’d rather be locked down here with Lotor for the next decade of his life than stand before Sendak and be made to feel all those messaged up things again.

*

Dozing off without meaning to, Lance kept his eyes closed as he listened to the others. Shiro had moved from beside him. Sam and Matt talking technical stuff while Curtis and Shiro fretted about having Lance in the cold and how it couldn’t be good for his mental health... that and how Lance was going to need blood. He could have kept up the charade if he hadn’t been suddenly made aware of why he was awake, throwing up violently beside himself. Fuck. Pregnant. Right. His twins didn’t care they were making his father throw his guts up at random times.

Hacking and coughing, Shiro came over to him

“Lance, you okay?”

“Morning sickness... sucks”

“It’s alright, buddy. Let’s get you away from the mess”

“Not much point when I’m...”

Yep. There he went, gasping like a fish out of water before throwing up again. The cold had crept in. Holding his ego down was hard. Those bars looking pretty tempting despite their construction.

Shiro sat patiently by him until he was done. Letting himself be moved by Shiro did nothing for his ego. His nails extending as the hunter sat him down closer to the group

“You just had to throw up, didn’t you?”

“Fuck off, Fido”

Growling at him, Matt pushed the wrong buttons. Lance snarling back in his friends face with his fangs extended, Shiro looping his arms around Lance’s waist as if he was trying to hold Lance back

“Enough! Matt. Your ego is out of control. Rieva is with Coran. He’s the best person to help her. Lance... can you try to bring your ego back under control. You’re making your scary face”

“He can’t fucking help it. He won’t settle until he sees his mate. And I can’t stop my fucking morning sickness. Fuck this”

Unexpectedly Sam chuckled

“I never thought I’d ever hear you swear quite as many times as you have. Somehow it’s quite relieving”

Ugh. He had been swearing a lot. And thanks to Keith “Fuck” had slipped more and more into his vocabulary. No one really used it swear any more as it was. It was just a convenient word for summing up all sorts of feelings in different situations

“That’s because my Mami taught me to have manners. I’m not usually this angry”

“Usually he’s pathetic”

Lance nearly snarled at Matt again. He would have if Shiro hadn’t sighed, changing topics

“Okay. Lance, we started discussing exit strategies on the way out. Naturally we assume everything we’re saying can be heard”

Lance nodded because it did make sense

“Sendak would hear it. If not him, he’ll have someone listening out”

Technically he didn’t know if it was Sendak. He was simply the assumption seeing Lotor was at VOLTRON and they were here. Lotor also knew he was pregnant and probably that he hadn’t been well. Maybe if he could have turned into a bat, he could have gotten them all out by now. Half talking to himself he said his inner thoughts out loud

“If we can overload the bars then we should be able to bend them”

Either he had to grab them or Matt did. He obviously couldn’t because of the twins. Matt had been through enough as it was. Maybe...

“If we put something against them will the current shock it? Like... maybe we could start an electrical fire and trigger a fault?”

“Or we could start a fire and die in it”

That was too close to Keith’s nightmare for comfort and way too close to how he’d lost his father. He wouldn’t do that to Keith. Sam pretended it was a good idea

“We’ll keep that in mind. Matt, can you check if you can see any kind of cabling or switches?”

“Why? We’re on the wrong side of the bars to do anything”

Ugh. Even Lance got that they needed as much information about the environment they were being kept in, and he was falling back to sleep

“Your eyesight is better than ours. It’s so dark in here I can barely see a thing”

Matt got up, walking over to the bars, he stood there for a good moment and a half

“I don’t see anything. I’d say we’re in a basement, but other than a few scraps against the wall, there’s no switches”

“Nothing on the roof?”

“No”

“How thick is the outer wall?”

Oops he was asking questions again... Matt sighing at him. Matt really wasn’t great at this “captivity thing”. He expected more “Let me out!” And “I’m going to piss on your leg!” from him

“How is that supposed to help us?”

“I don’t know, we’ve got a vampire, a slightly cursed human and a werewolf. If we can’t go through the wall we can always go through the roof”

“And what do you know about construction?”

“I know enough. I renovated my house inside out, plus dust and mould don’t really affect vampires like it does with humans”

“Dude, you’re so weak I doubt you’d make any impact if you tried. Why don’t you just go back to sleep?”

Lance had had enough of Matt’s attitude. He was trying... even if he was failing, he was still trying... Matt might be able keep his hunger under control, but a few days and Lance would either go completely crazy or collapse unconscious and be no help at all

“Matt’s right. You need your rest”

Now Shiro was agreeing with Matt?! Maybe he wasn’t the best “prisoner” but it hurt to be dismissed. Whatever. He was going to keep his temper and hopefully his mouth in check.

*

Lance had hit cranky. By his estimate it’d been something around 12 hours since he’d been rudely stolen. They were resting in shifts. Shiro urging Sam and Curtis to rest. Lance trying not to feel any kind of jealous over the pair of them at least being kidnapped together. He missed his boyfriend and hunger was setting in. He was cold. Cold. Tired. Hungry. Lonely... and mostly cranky. There should be kind of clause to this morning sickness where you only threw up when there was something there to actually throw up. Rubbing his stomach in soft yet agitated circles, he couldn’t bed himself down like the others, instead getting up to pace.

“Lance?”

Shiro sounded sleepy. He’d known the hunter was still awake, but had wondered if maybe Shiro was really simply sleeping with his eyes open

“I’m fine”

“I didn’t say you weren’t... but I would understand if you’re lying to me right now”

“I’m fine, Shiro. You should sleep”

“Nah... I’m good”

Well this was awkward. Why was Shiro trying to talk to him if he didn’t have anything to say? Walking over to the door into the cell, Lance stared down the lock. It was keeping him from his Keith and he didn’t like it

“Don’t touch it”

“I wasn’t going to”

“I know it’s hard but the best thing we can do at the moment is wait it out”

“There’s lots of other things we could be doing”

Whoops. He was letting his crankiness show. Seriously though. He didn’t get how a little bit of electricity was keeping everyone so obedient. Covering your hands would protect you from the lead and mercury. A hard blow against the gate would probably work to knock the damn thing unlocked. His hunger was definitely affecting his thought process.

Climbing up from where he’d been sitting, Shiro walked over to him

“Matt got shocked when he tried touching the bars”

“I figured that much out already”

“I know you’re anxious and you want to see Keith...”

“Sorry, Shiro, but don’t even go there right now. I know he’s your brother, but to me... He’s the love of my life and the father of my twins. Like Matt can’t keep his temper worried about Rieva, I can’t keep my temper right now”

“Then what do you need?”

“Other than out of this ridiculous cage? Oh, I don’t know. My boyfriend. My bed. Blood. A good nights sleep. Honestly, pick one”

“If you need blood...”

“Don’t. I’m a ticking time bomb and you all know it. Starve me and I’ll lose control. Don’t tempt me with your blood”

Shiro sighed at him as he pinched the bridge of his nose

“Lance... You can’t help what you are”

“I’m not about to fucking feed on you. I have some self respect left under everything”

“It’s not about self respect. Look. We don’t know how long we’ll be in here”

“Well maybe if we fucking thought of an actual plan, we could break out”

“And what’s on the other side of the door? How many vampires are between us and getting out?”

“And how long until Matt wolfs out? How long before I lose control. I’ve fucking had it! You’re all here because I’m pregnant. Keith’s going to be fucking blaming himself. We have no clue what’s going to happen. I swear I’ll take my own fucking life before I let them hurt Keith’s children”

“We need to wait. Patience yields focus”

“I’m fucking focused enough. We don’t even have to start a big fire to short the bars out. We could collapse the fucking ceiling between me and Matt. Yet we’re sitting here like good little children. They hurt Keith and I’m not going to hold back when I see them”

“Keith’s fine. He was with Coran”

Physically fine meant nothing when Keith would overthinking absolutely everything

“That’s not what I meant and you know it. You didn’t see the look on his face at the news you guys were missing. I did. He’s going to be tearing himself apart. Blaming himself for everything. He’s been through more than enough”

“And if you get hurt? Then what? He wouldn’t want you hurt”

“At least he’d know I tried my hardest to get back to him”

Shiro wrapped his arms around him

“We’ll get back to him. You’ll see. He’ll be fussing over you and the twins in no time”

“I... just want to see him again”

“I know. We will. For now all we can do is wait”

Lance sniffled, returning Shiro’s hug

“I hate what this is doing to him”

“I know. I also know whatever he’s doing, he’ll have Krolia, and Coran, and Allura. He’s not going to be alone”

“Not until he snaps and pushes them away, or takes off on his own thinking he knows best”

Shiro chuckled

“They’re not going to let that happen. He’ll be cranky, and probably won’t let you out of his sight, but he’s not going to care about anything once he sees you again”

“You too... it was like the worst feeling hearing Rieva was shot and you guys were missing... I felt so useless”

“At least you’ve got hilarious friends to keep you preoccupied”

“I don’t see anyone hilarious in here”

Shiro chuckled again Lance’s weak humour

“Alright, come sit back down, kiddo. When the moments right, we’ll all get out of this together”

[tiny-opal-essence]

Pocket Paladin Chpt 11

2nd mission

Lance pushed the red blanket off of himself as he slowly woke up.  He sat on the edge of the bed as he blinked the sleep from his eyes.  His feet touched the ground.

Wait.  My feet touch the ground?

He opened his eyes in shock and looked around.  The lights weren’t on in the room, so he couldn’t make out all the details of the furniture.  He figured he must have woken up early.  Looking down at himself, he could hardly believe his eyes.

I’m back to normal height!  OMG!  I’ve got to tell the others!

“Hey everyone!  I’m back to norm-” Lance ran into the door.  “Ow.”

Why didn’t that open?  It should open automatically, right?

When Lance’s vision cleared, he realized why it hadn’t opened.  The oversized light switch next to the door gave it away.

Oh, that’s right.  I’m in the dollhouse.

He wasn’t sure if the tears in his eyes were from the physical or emotional pain.

‘You didn’t really expect the spell to wear off that easily, did you?’

I guess not, but it would have been nice.

He heard the bed creak loudly through the wall of the dollhouse.

“Lance?” Keith said groggily.  “Are you ok?”

“Yeah, just bumped my head.” He hissed slightly in pain.

“Are you sure?” The bed continued to creak as Keith sat up.

“Don’t worry about me.  I’ll be fine.  You can go back to sleep.”

“Do you need some ice?”

“Nah, it’s not that bad.”

“It still might be a good idea to look at it, just in case.”

“Fine.” Lance agreed and wiped the tears from his eyes.

Keith slid the wall of the dollhouse away while Lance flipped on the light inside the room.

It’s just plain weird watching an entire wall move away in front of you.

“Do you feel dizzy?” Keith asked as he looked down at Lance.

“No.  My head hurts, but that’s it.”

“Do you have a headache?”

“I don’t think so.”

“Well, you’re not slurring words and you know who and where you are, so I don’t think you have a concussion.”

“That’s good.”  He paused for a second.  “How come you know how to tell if someone has a concussion?”

It was Keith’s turn to pause.  “Rough childhood.”

Lance could tell that Keith didn’t want to talk about it, so he changed the subject.

“Well, I feel ok and I don’t have a concussion, so let’s just go back to sleep, kay?” He let out a shaky laugh.  “Goodnight!”

“I heard what you said before.  About being back to normal.”  Keith said quietly.

Lance didn’t know if it was just because of being tricked by the dollhouse or if it was everything else that he was trying to hold back and hide from the others, but it all suddenly became too much for him.

“And what about it?” Lance spat out.  “Are you going to make fun of me?  Hey everyone, Lance got tricked by a stupid dollhouse and thought that he was back to normal height!  Let’s all laugh at him!” He could feel the tears forming in his eyes again.  “He’s almost been crushed, stepped on, fallen, and can’t stop thinking about all the other ways he’s almost died and how useless he is!  But even this is a new low!  I mean, tricked by a fancy piece of plastic or whatever this is made of!”  He kicked at the wall and barely held in a cry at the pain.

Yeah, that’s more heavy-duty than plastic.

No matter how much he tried, he couldn’t stop the tears from falling.  He sank down against the dollhouse wall and put his head down in his arms to try to hide them from Keith.

‘Way to lose your cool in front of your crush.  Now what will he think of you?  If there even was a chance that he liked you before it’s definitely gone now.’

Keith didn’t know how to handle this.  He’d never seen Lance this upset.  Should he try to hug him?  How would that work given their current difference in height?  Hand hug?  Maybe just pat him on the back, or tap him on the back?

“Lance?” Keith said softly while hesitatingly reaching towards him.

“Forget I said anything.”  Even though it came out a mumble, Lance’s voice was enough to make Keith’s hand pause a moment before reaching for the red bandana that had been serving as Lance’s blanket.

“Here.” Keith handed it to Lance to dry his eyes.

“Thanks.”

They were both quiet for a moment.

“I’m sorry I’m not good at this whole comforting thing.”

“Really?  I couldn’t tell.” Lance looked up at Keith with a hint of a smile on his face.

“I could go get Hunk for you if you want.”

“You don’t need to do that.  I don’t want to bother him when it’s not a big deal.”

“It kind of sounds like it might be a big deal.”

“I’m just tired.” -of being this small.  Lance rested his chin on his arms.  “I could really go for one of my mom’s hugs right now.”

“I’d give you a hug, but that might squish you.”

“You could just do what I do with the space mice.”

Oh my God, why would I say that?

“Ok.  What do I do?” Keith managed to hide his own internal nervousness.

“Just lay your hand flat on the ground for me.” Lance stood up and stepped onto Keith’s hand.  “Now, lift me up to your chest.” He could hear Keith’s heart beating before he leaned against his chest.  “And then press lightly against me with your other hand.”

Keith somewhat awkwardly brought his other hand to Lance to do just that.

Lance just barely felt his hand behind him.

“You know you can press harder than that, right?  I’m not made of glass.”

“I know, I don’t want to hurt you.”

“Believe me, if you were hurting me, I’d let you know.”

Keith pressed a bit harder and Lance let him know when it was good.

Lance could feel how warm Keith was through his pajama shirt.  The warmth surrounding him and the heartbeat in his ear were comforting.  The *bu-bump bu-bump* helped anchor him in the moment.  The sound was loud enough to get rid of almost all of his worries.  He thought he felt Keith’s heart sped up slightly, but it was probably just a trick from his tired brain.

This feels nice.

‘Don’t get used to it.  He’s only doing it because he feels sorry for you.’

I know, but that doesn’t mean I can’t enjoy it while it lasts.

Keith started absentmindedly rubbing Lance on the back and he melted into the embrace.

“Is the bandana working?”

Lance could feel Keith’s chest resonate as he spoke.  It was oddly soothing.

“Much better than whatever came with the doll bed.” Lance smiled slightly.  “I still can’t believe you thought that just that over your face would be a good disguise for rescuing Shiro.  I recognized you from over 50 yards away!”

“How did you recognize me?”

“Dude, you’re the only person I know that has a mullet.  I’d recognize that mullet anywhere.”

“I thought it was a good disguise.”

“Just cause it works in old movies doesn’t mean it works in real life.  It was still cool watching you knock out some of the senior staff, even if you didn’t remember me.”

“I did remember you.  Kind of hard not to with how loud you are.”

“Hey!  I am just the right amount of loud!” Lance looked up at Keith indignantly.

“Ok.” Keith brought his hand up and away from Lance in an ‘ok, you’re right’ motion.  “The reason it seemed like I didn’t remember you is because I thought your name was Taylor and I was confused when you said it was something else.”

“Why would you think my name was Taylor?  I told you right off the bat that ‘the name’s Lance’, remember?”

“You kept saying in class that people called you Taylor cause of how you threaded the needle.”

“The tailor.  Like the person who fixes clothes.”

“…That makes more sense.”

Lance grabbed onto Keith’s pajama shirt with his hands and buried his face into it while trying to stifle his laughter.

“You thought my name was Taylor for two years?  Two years!  Haha.”

“And a few months,” Keith added in the partial year he was in the Garrison.

“Dude, that just makes it worse.  Haha.”

Keith was glad to see Lance smiling again after his outburst, even if it was at his own expense.

“Are you feeling better?”

“Yeah.  There’s just a lot on my mind right now.  Sorry I kind of made you hug me.”

“Oh, uh, it’s ok.”

“*Yawn* I know you’re not really the biggest fan of hugs.”

Keith wanted to tell Lance that that wasn’t true, that he did like hugs, he just wasn’t used to them.  But he didn’t.  Instead, he brought Lance back to his room in the dollhouse and reached for the wall to close it.

“Wait!” Lance cried out, causing Keith to pause.  “Can you leave it open?  In case my brain decides to be stupid again?”

“Sure.”

Lance grabbed Keith’s bandana and climbed into his bed.  He pulled the makeshift blanket up to his chin and turned on his side so his back was to Keith.

“Good night, Keith.”

“Night, Lance.”

Lance breathed in the scent of the bandana and smiled slightly.

It smells just like him.

Keith turned out the light in the dollhouse and laid back down in his bed.  He could tell that Lance had fallen back asleep easily.  That was harder for Keith to do.  He laid awake for a while wondering why he couldn’t just tell Lance that he liked hugs.  It doesn’t seem like something that would be hard to say, and yet for him, it was.  He was also wondering why it felt so warm where he had been hugging Lance against his chest.  It was a different kind of warmth than just residual heat, but Keith couldn’t even begin to figure out what it was.  Maybe he should ask Shiro about it.  He’d probably just tell him that he has to figure it out himself or something similar.  It might be better to do that on his own without getting the ‘You are going to do great things one day’ speech.  He fell asleep soon after.

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“What do we know about this planet?” Shiro asked as everyone looked at the projected image.

“Dezevernent was one of the first planets to fall to the Galra Empire.” Coran began to explain.  “It’s people were told that if they went willingly, they would be spared.  They were deceived.  There were no survivors.”

“The Galra have a base here, but our sources show that it hasn’t been used in some time.” Allura pointed to the location on the projection.

“So then why is Lotor there?”  Lance asked from the floating tray.

“That’s what we’re going to find out,” Pidge said.

“Does the system say anything else about it?” Hunk wondered.

“It looks like there’s a good-sized forest.  That will give us plenty of cover so we can sneak close to the base and see what’s going on.” Pidge commented.

“It looks pretty thick.  Our lions won’t be able to go through all those trees.  We’ll have to go on foot.” Keith pointed out.

“Meaning, we’ll have to land the castleship on the planet,” Shiro stated.

“If we go over here,” Allura spun the projection to the area she was referring to, “we should be able to land the castle undetected.”

“I’ll send Rover 2.0 ahead to scout out the entrance to the base.  That way we know where Lotor’s crew is.” Pidge said.

“Are the trees really that red?” Lance looked at the pictures that were displayed next to the projected planet.

“Oh yes.  I remember visiting there with my family a few times.” Coran reminisced.  “We always had such a great time camping.  Roland always loved-” There was a faraway look in his eyes as he dropped the end of the sentence.

“Coran?  Are you alright?” Allura asked.

Coran shook himself out of the past.  “I’m alright, Princess.  Please, continue with the briefing.”

“Very well.  Since the trees are so brightly colored, Keith, you’ll be the one that’s able to get closest to plant the tracker on Lotor’s ship.��� Allura continued.

“You should wear your jacket too.  It will help you blend in more with the trees.” Lance suggested.

“Good idea, Lance,” Shiro commented.

Lance beamed at the praise from his hero.

Yes!  They liked my idea!

‘Statistically speaking one of your ideas had to be good at some point.’

“Who’s Lance going to be with for this mission?” Pidge asked.

“Well, there’s only three of us that have pockets, and mine somehow got ripped when I did laundry.”  Hunk said.  “That leaves just Keith and Shiro.”

“I’m still…a bit nervous to carry Lance.” Shiro responded.

“I’m cool bringing him with me.” Keith shrugged nonchalantly.

“Wouldn’t that be a bit risky, since you’re the one that’s going to get the closest to Lotor?” Pidge asked.

“I’ll stay far enough away that they won’t notice me.  Or Lance.” Keith responded.  He wanted Lance to come on the mission.  Given his outburst earlier that morning, Lance was feeling like he couldn’t do anything.  Keith wasn’t really good at talking to people, so he couldn’t tell Lance that he was still an important member of the team, but he could show him.  “We all agreed that Lance would be allowed to come on recon missions.”

“True.  It should be alright, but if for the slightest second you think someone’s spotted you, you need to get out of there fast.  We can’t risk a fight when Lance is with us.” Shiro stated.

“This is recon only, so do not engage the enemy.  Keep the comms open and stay out of sight.” Allura added.

“Good luck, paladins,” Coran said.

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“Thanks for sticking up for me back there,” Lance said from his spot in Keith’s jacket pocket.

“Don’t mention it.  We all agreed, so that’s what we’re doing.”  Keith hacked away at the red vines as they made their way through the forest, all the while trying to make it a less bumpy ride for Lance.  They were almost at the base.

Lance could tell that Keith was trying, but despite his efforts, it was still a bit bumpy.  He kept slamming into Keith’s chest.

Slamming’s not the right word.  Bumping?  Yeah, bumping!

‘Congratulations, you know words.’

Shut up.

It was different traveling in the jacket pocket vs. the utility belt.  The jacket pocket didn’t have a zipper, so there was plenty of light.  It also made it easier for Lance to poke his head out and see what was going on if he so chose.  He found it was easier to just lay down in the pocket.  The material was softer and more hammock-like.  The pocket rocked slightly with each step Keith took, but all in all, it was preferable to the utility belt.  It was relaxing listening to the *bu-bump bu-bump* in his ear again.

Lance knew the only reason that he got to be in the jacket pocket this time was because the planet was uninhabited.  The jacket pocket gives away that there’s something in it while the utility belt doesn’t, hence why he has to be in the utility belt for inhabited planets.  They don’t want to risk someone getting too curious and seeing Lance while he’s like this.

“We’re almost there.  Is there anything we should be looking out for, Pidge?” Keith asked through the comms.

“Rover 2.0 isn’t picking up anything unusual.  Lotor and Ezor went in the base about 15 dobashes ago and the other three are still guarding the entrance.  You’re on the right track to get to their ship.  Just keep heading southwest and you’ll be there.  I’m going to see if Rover 2.0 can get a closer look.  I’ll let you know if any of them start heading your way.” Pidge replied.

“Sounds good, Pidgeon,” Lance responded.

Sure enough, a minute or so later, they saw Lotor’s ship.  Keith got out the tracking device and checked with Pidge that no one was coming towards the ship.  Once she gave the all clear, he approached the ship.  He found a good place to hide the device and made sure it was attached tight.

“Do you want to activate it?” Keith looked down at Lance.

“Me?” Lance was surprised.

“You’re part of this team, right?”

“Yeah.” Lance climbed onto Keith’s hand.  Keith lifted him up to the tracker and Lance pushed the button on it.  The light turned on to show that it was transmitting.

“Tracker’s on the ship,” Keith told the others through the comms.

“Signal’s coming in strong.  Nice job, Keith.”  Pidge said.

“And Lance,” Hunk added on.

“Thank you, Hunk,” Lance responded as Keith put him back in his pocket.  “Any luck getting Rover 2.0 closer, Pidge?”

“No.  There’s too many vines for him to get close without getting tangled in them.  I can’t get close enough to pick up what they’re saying.”

“What if Keith went closer?  He’s got heightened hearing and blends in more with all this red.” Hunk suggested.

“That could work, but it would be too risky if Lance is with you, Keith. You’d have to drop Lance off with us before you go up there.” Shiro stated.

“We don’t know how long they’re going to be here.  This could be our only chance to find out what they came here for.” Keith argued.

“Would you really be willing to risk Lance’s life for this?” Shiro asked.

“We’re paladins.  We risk our lives so others don’t have to.  And as Keith said, this might be our only chance to learn more.  If they find the tracking device before we figure out what they’re up to, we might not catch up with them again before they put their plan into action.  I’m ok with taking a bit of a risk to avoid that.” Lance responded.

“I don’t like this, but it might be our only option.  *sigh* Very well, but be careful.” Allura warned them.

“When have I ever not been careful?  Don’t answer that sentence, Hunk”

Keith stuck to the edge of the trees as he crept closer to the entrance to the base.  It seemed no one on Lotor’s team had moved from their post.  He crouched down and slowly approached them while remaining hidden and making sure Lance didn’t fall out of his pocket.  As he got closer, he saw that the cat that had been laying down suddenly get up and start walking around the three generals posted outside the entrance.  Soon enough, he could make out what was being said by the three generals.  More accurately, said by the two generals who could speak.  He repeated what he was hearing into the comms.

“How much longer is this going to take?” Zethrid asked.

“Not too much longer,” Axha responded.

“How long does it take to find the plans for whatever superweapon Lotor’s planning to use anyways?”

“It’s a big area to search.  Give them time to find what they’re looking for.”

“I’m itching to do something besides just standing guard.  Why are we even doing this?  There’s no one else here.  This dump’s been abandoned for deca-phoebs.  We could have just split up to get all the pieces of the blueprints.  It’s going to take over a movement to find the rest.”

“Lotor’s instructions were very specific.  We do as he says.”

Kova *meowed* in agreement as Narti picked him up and brought him up to her shoulders.

“Ugggh fine.  Doesn’t mean I have to enjoy it.” Zethrid grumbled out while keeping a good grip on her weapon.

“You can stop with the theatrics,” Lotor said as he and Ezor emerged from the base.  “We have what we came for.”

And so do we.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Everyone was once again in the castleship.

“We all heard what they said.  They’re building something.  We need to find out what.” Shiro said.

“It’s too bad they didn’t mention the name of it or what planet they’re going to next.”  Hunk commented.

“That would be too good to be true if they had,” Lance said, poking his head out of Keith’s jacket pocket.

“We still have the tracker.”  Pidge pointed at the dot on the screen before it disappeared.  “We had the tracker.  Dammit!”

“It took them longer to find it than last time,” Keith mentioned.

“Yeah, but they still found it.”

“We’ll send word to our allies to be on the lookout.  If they see anything, they’ll let us know.” Coran stated.

 “For now, let’s keep heading in the same direction Lotor was before we lost the signal,” Allura recommended.

“I’m going to get dinner ready.” Hunk said.

“And in the meantime, I’ll get the game set up,” Pidge said.

“Woo hoo!  Videogame night!” Lance exclaimed from Keith’s pocket.

“Let me guess, another tradition you started while I was gone?” Shiro had a smile on his face.

“We actually consider it a part of training.  Pidge has told me that these games are helpful for hand-eye coordination and improving reflexes, though I’m still getting the hang of them.” Allura explained.

“Sounds like fun.”

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

“I believe we can call that a success,” Lotor said.  “Kova served us well as a lookout and Ezor was able to sneak aboard their ship and clone the signature code on the tray while they believed she was in the base with me the entire time.”

“They didn’t even try to hide it.  It was right in the main hallway outside the control room.” Ezor responded with a smug smile.  “I also managed to swipe some treats from their kitchen.”

The others were eating some of said treats.

“These are amazing.” Axha had a rare smile on her face.

“Maybe we should go after the yellow one instead.” Zethrid joked.  “We could force him to make more of these.”

*Meow*

“Yeah, Narti.  I know we need that one for the plan.  I still don’t get what makes him so special.  He’s not much to look at.” Zethrid said.

“Especially now, given his new height,” Ezor added with a laugh.

“All will be revealed in good time.  For now, we should let commander Schurke know that he should be expecting some…guests in his sector.” Lotor smugly responded.

“They certainly won’t be getting a warm welcome from him,” Axha stated.

“Oh, I see what you did there, Axha.  That’s clever.” Ezor commented.

“Babe, you’ve got Schokolade on your face,” Zethrid said.

“Where?”

Zethrid kissed Ezor on the lips.  “There.  Got it.”

“I don’t know, I think you might have missed some.” Ezor looked up at Zethrid with a mischievous look in her eyes.

“Do keep in mind that we all use this space.” Lotor reminded them.

“We know.  Bedroom activities stay in the bedroom.”

“We’ll be back.” Zethrid grabbed Ezor’s hand and a handful of cookies before they left the room.

Narti grabbed another cookie for herself before turning back to the screen in front of her.  She zoomed in on the camera feed that the paladins were in.  Kova curled up next to the keyboard and she rubbed behind his ears, causing him to start *purring*.

“Let’s see if we can learn something from this videogame night of theirs,” Lotor commented.

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“Dinner is served.” Hunk came into the lounge followed by a floating tray.

Lance could see that Hunk had brought the doll-sized table and chairs for him and the space mice.  He also saw what food was on the tray.

“*gasp* Are those…”

“Garlic knots?  Yep.  Well, closest I can get to them.  I figured pizza and garlic knots would be good for videogame night.” Hunk responded as he set up the doll furniture on Lance’s tray.

“You got that right!  Hand ‘em over!”

“Pidge.” Shiro used his space-dad voice.

“Uggh.  Please hand ‘em over.”

Hunk divvied out the pizza and garlic knots, including mini ones for Lance and the space mice.  It was thin crust, but it looked more like deep dish from Lance’s perspective.  He wasn’t complaining.  It was better than having to practically unhinge his jaw to take a bite of a normal slice.  The garlic knots were also a bit bigger he was used to, but hey, that just means more for him.

Allura and Coran had pulled up a counter out of the floor so everyone could put their plates down.  Also, so Lance’s tray could rest on there instead of awkwardly floating around.

Lance and the space mice took their seats between Keith and Hunk.  It was nice to have something that was more to their scale, though Platt was too tall for the doll chair, so he just sat on the ground.

“Did you guys do anything fun today while we were on the mission?” Lance asked the space mice.

Most of the mice nodded, while Plachule shrugged his shoulders nonchalantly.  Chulatt started *squeaking* excitedly and gesturing too fast for Lance to understand.

“I didn’t quite catch that, Chulatt.  Could you repeat it, just a bit slower?”

“He says that they worked some more on their routine.” Allura translated before Chulatt had a chance to *squeak* again.

“Routine?” Pidge asked.

“Oh, I don’t believe I told you.  The space mice have a little show they’ve been putting together, with tightropes, trapeze, and such.”  Allura explained.

“Like a circus?” Keith questioned.

“What’s a circus?” Coran asked.

“It’s basically everything Allura said, but with people instead of space mice,” Shiro stated.

“Circus.  I like that word.” Coran said.

“A space mice circus would be so cute!” Hunk exclaimed.

“Yeah!” Lance said.

“Maybe Lance could join them while he’s like this,” Pidge suggested.

“Aww, that’d be adorable!” Hunk commented.

Not exactly the word I would use.  No offense meant to the space mice.

‘But you would be so cute, just like a pet doing tricks.’

I’m not a pet!  Don’t you have anything actually important to do?

‘Don’t you?’

Everyone finished their food and Pidge started getting the game system set up.

“I’m going to go work on some repairs,” Coran said.  “I could use some help from the space mice if they’d like.”

The space mice nodded that they were ok with it.

“What needs fixing?” Lance asked.

“Oh, just some pipes.  There have been some unexplained sounds coming out of them.  It shouldn’t take too long.  Be back in a jiffy!”  Coran and the space mice left to go take care of that.

“We only have 4 controllers, so we have to rotate people in,” Pidge explained while the Smash Bros loading screen popped up.

“Sounds good,”  Shiro commented.

“I’ll sit out this round.  I’ve got to bring the dishes back to the kitchen anyway.” Hunk started gathering the dishes.

“Me too,”  Shiro said.  “It’s been a while since I played.”

“Alright everyone, choose your fighters.”  Pidge moved her cursor to select Shamus.

Allura chose Zelda and Keith chose Fox.

Lance grabbed the joystick and moved it over the characters.

Good thing I got some practice with this thing on the floating tray.

He hovered it over Kirby and reached over to select him but found that he couldn’t quite reach the buttons on the controller.  He took a few steps to the right and hit the button.

Their characters popped up in Dream Land.  The countdown began, and everyone got ready.  Once it finished, everyone started attacking each other except Lance.  Due to his height, he couldn’t move Kirby with the joystick and attack at the same time.

Just my luck.

It wasn’t long before Pidge was able to launch him off the stage.  He tried to use some of Kirby’s moves to get back on it, but that was the moment the tree decided to start blowing some wind in his direction.

“Oh come on!”

“Don’t be a sore loser, Lance.”

“Who you calling a loser?  I’ve still got three lives.  You’re going down, Pidge.”

“Bring it.”

Zelda had managed to knock Fox off the stage during that time.

“Nice, Allura.  You’ve gotten better.” Keith said.

“Not as good as me, though,” Pidge said as Shamus hit Zelda off stage.

Lance was trying to find a way to reach both the joystick and buttons.

Maybe if I lay down on the controller, I can move the joystick with my legs and hit the buttons with my hands.  Yeah, that’ll work.

Lance found he could just barely touch the joystick with his toes and reach the farthest of the four buttons.  Kirby popped back on the stage and used his ability on Shamus.

“Got you, Pidge!”

“Not for long,” Keith said as Fox was able to knock Kirby and Shamus both off the stage.  Pidge was able to get Shamus back on solid ground, but Lance couldn’t get to the joystick in time and lost Kirby’s second life.

“Dang it!”

“You’re going to pay for that, Keith.” Shamus began going crazy with attacks on Fox before he was launched once more off the stage.

“How are you this good, Pidge?” Lance asked as he waited for Kirby to pop up once more.

“If you think she’s good, you should see Matt play.  He wipes the floor with her.” Shiro commented with a smile.

Pidge looked over at him incredulously, which gave Allura the opportunity to have Zelda knock Shamus off the stage.

“That doesn’t count!  Shiro distracted me!”

“I saw that, and it definitely counts.” Hunk said as he came back into the lounge.

“Yeah, don’t be a sore loser, Pidge.” Lance taunted her.  As he looked towards her, Kirby popped back on stage and was being pushed back towards the edge by the tree.  He quickly looked back and tried to get to the joystick but wasn’t fast enough once more.

“Why does this keep happening?  I swear that tree is out to get me!” Lance hit the controller with his fists in frustration.

The others were starting to realize how much of a challenge playing the game at his new height was for Lance.  They felt bad that they hadn’t noticed it earlier.

When Kirby popped up for the last time, Fox was right next to him.  Kirby hit Fox repeatedly.  Lance noticed that Keith wasn’t hitting back.

“Why aren’t you fighting back?”

“Uh, well, you’re not doing so great.”

“Well, neither are you.  Don’t go easy on me.”

I don’t want your pity.

“Fine by me,” Pidge said as she once again knocked Kirby off the stage one last time.

With that, the game was down to only three players.  Then two as Allura was taken down.  In the end, Pidge was the winner.

Lance looked at his stats and was disappointed.

I didn’t get a single KO?  I thought I would do better than that.

‘Look at that.  You can’t even play a simple game.  What use could you possibly have to the team?’

Hey, I helped on the mission today!

‘Oh yeah, cause riding in someone’s pocket and pushing a button is so helpful.  It’s not like he could have done that without you or anything.’

“Maybe we should do a movie night instead of this.” Hunk suggested.

“What?  Why?” Lance asked.

“Well, this is presenting a…unique challenge for you,”  Allura said.

“But Hunk and Shiro haven’t had a chance to play yet.  That’s not fair to them.”

“But it isn’t really fair to you if you can’t participate,”  Shiro mentioned.

“Please don’t stop on my account.  I can just sit out and be moral support.  It’s fine.”

“If you’re sure…” Hunk started.

“I’m sure.  You should play.” Lance gestured for Hunk to grab the controller from in front of him.

“I’ll sit out too.”  Keith handed his controller to Shiro.  “Then Hunk and Shiro can both play.”

Hunk selected Pikachu and Shiro chose Link.

While the second round was going on, Keith was thinking.  It really wasn’t fair that Lance couldn’t play the game just cause he couldn’t reach the buttons and the joystick at the same time…at the same time…maybe…

Pidge was the winner of the second round, as per usual.

“Who’s switching with Keith?” Shiro asked.

“I think it might be time for someone to win besides Pidge,” Allura commented.

“Actually,” Keith interjected, “I think I figured out a way for Lance to play.”

“But he can’t reach all the buttons.  No offense, Lance.” Pidge said.

“None taken.”

“You’re right.  He can’t reach all the buttons-” Keith started.

Hey!

“-but he can reach half of them.”

“What do you mean?” Hunk asked.

“Well, maybe Lance could team up with someone and only use half of the controller while they used the other.”

“That…actually could work,”  Shiro responded.

“But there would still be a slight disadvantage with them having to say what they’re planning to do out loud.” Pidge pointed out.

“Well, then maybe we should do that everyone pairs up to use only half a controller each, that way it’s fair,” Allura suggested.

“Then we all can play at the same time!” Lance exclaimed.

“I’m down.” Hunk said and everyone voiced their agreement.

“Alright, this round’s teams are Hunk and Pidge, Keith and Lance, and me and Allura.”

Pidge and Hunk chose Shamus.  Allura and Shiro talked shortly before deciding to go with Sheik.  Lance and Keith took a little longer in their decision.

“Why would you want to be Kirby?  Fox is so much cooler.” Keith said.

“Kirby’s shaped like a friend!  He’s adorable!”

“Oh yeah, cause that’s totally useful in a fight.”

“Not with that attitude!”

“GUYS!” Pidge yelled.  “Just pick someone already.  I want another chance to kick your butts.”

They compromised on Meta Knight.  Lance was in charge of the buttons, Keith the joystick.  It was different playing this way, but fun.  Lance was just glad that he could participate like this.

The round was finished with Lance and Keith as the winners.

“What?  Re-do.  There’s no way I lost to you guys.  I kicked both of your butts in the first round.” Pidge said.

“Yeah, but with us working together, we took you down.  Team Klance for the win!” Lance exclaimed.

“Klance?”

“You know, Keith and Lance.  Klance.  It’s both of our names smashed together.”

“Oh.”

“Well, team Punk’s going to kick your butts in the next round,” Pidge claimed.

“I thought we could be team Hidge since punk’s already a thing.”

“What would ours be?  Shallura?  Alliro?” Allura asked.

“I like Shallura,” Shiro said.

“Or you guys could just be Space-parents,” Lance said jokingly.

“Alright, because of that line, you guys are going down in this next round,” Shiro stated.

“Bring it, Space-dad,” Keith said with a small smile.

They played the game through the night, unaware of the danger they were approaching.

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Realities without Lance: 95 (+11)

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[leoninaiart]

Shance - Little notes.

Just imagine Lance liking Shiro so much and wanting to cheer him up bc he sees how stressed the older one is. So he decided to leave some notes with cheering words on them.

But the thing is he is so damn embarrassed that he wrote them in Spanish because he wants to cheer Shiro but he can't help the embarrassment that comes with the idea of his hero reading some cheesy notes. And obviously Shiro doesn't understand a single word in the notes, recognizing the simple handwriting of Lance and thinking this is some kind of weird joke he isn't aware of.

He's curious about the meaning anyway. Though Lance never talked in Spanish, the notes were in the same language, and that's weird. What do they even say? Something good? Something bad? Is he supposed to translate them somehow?

But they're in war, and there's been a LOT going on. Shiro forgets the notes, hidden in the Black Lion storage, and tries to keep his focus on the situation ahead. The notes that were every morning at his door also stopped appearing. Maybe it was a good thing. This little mystery game they had was a distraction from more important things.

Then they get home.

Sure, they had to fight to push off the Galra from Earth, but they made it. This is it, finally at home. In the beginning of the execution of the big comeback, Lance is having some trouble with the Galra ships, not being able to even reach his Lion. Shiro has the biggest heart attack even when Lance stops responding, and his mind can't help but think about all the times Lance looked at him with shining eyes and a sweet smile. How he laughed, joked and was the light of the room with his bright smile. And then he remembered the notes and noticed how little attention he payed to Lance. He unfair to him, a young boy who did nothing wrong and always tried his best to just be there for them.

And he was so scared of losing him. Of not being able of hearing his sweet voice. Or seeing those deep blue eyes.

Then Lance started talking again and his soul was back in his body. Lance was fine, alive, breathing. But he couldn't focus, one single though invading his mind:

He had to fix this somehow.

They won. Sendak is finally dead.

It was like a dream come true.

A month later, the team was fully recovered and enjoying their home planet again. Shiro finally could feel that it was the moment to relax a little more, he had a lot of tirenedess accumulated. So he went to the Black Lion, even if he was no longer his pilot, the connection was still there, as strong as ever. The Lion, feeling the determination of his ex paladin, allowed him to enter. Shiro could practically feel the hype building up when he found the notes still in the same spot, mentally thanking Keith for being so uninsterested in exploring the Lion.

In less than 15 minutes, he got a small translator device from a young Garrison engineer (now that is full of alien species, translators are a must have for everyone) and was back in his room. Slowly, one by one he translated the words from the notes.

At first, the older ones were very short and simple.

'You're great'

'You can make it'

'Take a break'

'You're the best'

He laughed, the image of a very embarrassed Lance writing these very awkward words appeared in his mind.

The next ones were more strong and sweet.

'You're amazing! Never forget that!'

'The universe is lucky to have you!'

And, of course, some of them had a couple of puns, because we're talking about Lance and he just can't help it. Even small drawings of him or stars and planets. The older ones were next, and they took his breath away.

'You make me wanna be a better person everyday.'

'You are my hero, and the best leader I could have.'

'I hope you think I am importan, because you're the universe to me.'

'You're so great and talented, I'm lucky I get to be in the same team as you.'

Shiro was very confused, he didn't understand why there was such a mood change. He could practically feel how big Lance's appreciation and respect for him were in these notes. Damn, he was such an idiot for not noticing before. So focused in a cruel thing like war made him forget these kind of sweet things in his life.

There was still a letter left. But hee could read it later, he needed to see Lance. Now.

In a blink he was in front of Lance's dorm, though it wasn't very far from his. Feeling strangely nervous, he knocked the door. The door opened and Lance was there, in full glory. The marks of the battle were gone, and his (probably smooth) skin was shiny and healthy. The smaller boy smiled, curious, and before he could greet him, Shiro raised his hand with the notes.

Lance mount stayed open, recognizing them.

Was that a good or bad signal?

He saw how the other boy blushed, getting nervous immediately and avoiding his gaze.

'S-so you read them, right?'

'Yeah, I used a translator I got around here.'

'Oh...um...do you like them? I know they're a little weird'

Shiro smiled. This was the first time he saw how cute Lance was when embarrassed. Wait, he shouldn't think that of his teammate, not now, scratch that.

'I do, you're a great person, Lance. I'm very thankful for these notes.'

Lance watched him surprised, like he didn't expect him to say that, but then he avoided his gaze again.

'Cool. Um, about the last one, I have the missing note that continues the message.'

'Actually, I didn't read the last one, would you mind if I you read it for me? It's kind of a bummer to use this boring translator' he joked

Lance seemed like he was having an internal crisis of some kind, because he bited his lip and frowned. But then he smiled again casually, and nodded.

'Sure thing, come in, make yourself comfortable in uh, my room?'

Shiro chuckled a little and decided to sit at the bed. Lance was still up, holding the notes Shiro handled him, opening them slowly. With his voice slightly trembling, he started to read.

'I think It's about time I tell you something important. We have been in space a long time, and I don't wanna regret not telling you the truth. When the time is right, I'll give you the next note.'

Oh... That sounded... Very serious. Now Shiro didn't know what to think. Maybe Lance hated him because he never acknowledged his efforts, or because he kind of ignored his notes. The idea of Lance hating him made his heart ache with pain. He was getting so anxious he didn't even hear the sound of Lance opening the next note.

The voice of the smaller boy interrupted his thoughts.

'Alright... I'm going to read the next one. Shiro?'

'Yes?'

Lance blushed even more , those stunning blue eyes staring at him.

'Please don't freak out.'

... What? Why would he freak out to Lance? This was getting more and more strange.

'For the last few notes I've been trying to encourage you. I don't know what drive me to do it, I saw you one night looking at the stars and you seemed 10 years older and so tired. I had to do something. And even If it was a bit weird, and I knew you couldn't understand them because my dumbass brain decided to write them in Spanish, the warm feeling in my chest wouldn't go away. So I thought about it, a lot. About how much I worry about you, how much I want to show you how good I am, how much I want to spend time with you. Then I realized that you're not jusy my leader... '

Shiro's eyes widened.

'You're not just my hero either...'

Then Lance smiled, embarrassed.

'You're my everything. I like you, Takashi.'

'You... You what?!?'

Shiro couldn't believe this. He was so happy. But he shouldn't. This was Lance, his teammate, his companion. And he was just Shiro, broken after all what happened. Old and broken.

'I know it's... Disgusting that I like you... But say something, please, I'm like having a breakdown here.' Lance tried to joke, though he was crying and his voice sounded weird.

Then Shiro snapped out of his dark thoughts and really, REALLY looked at him. Lance, looking at the ground, the blue eyes full of tears. The face red, the lip bleeding a little, the hands holding his jacket with force. Then Lance looked at him too. And in their eyes the connection felt strong. So damn strong. And the warm in his heart burned. He just could feel the need. The ache of looking and Lance like this and doing nthing.

'But need of what? ' his mind asked.

'Need of Lance.' his heart supplied.

And after all what happened. The Kerberos mission. The kidnap. The arena. The lions. The war against the Galra. Zarkon. Sendak. Lotor. Haggar.

He deserves this. And Lance deserved it too.

So in half a second he's hugging Lance. It just takes another second before he can feel the warm arm returning the hug. He started petting his brown hair slowly, feeling the smooth hair. And Lance was sobbing, and laughing, and making some weird noise in between . Shiro laughed loudly, still petting his hair. And enjoying every little thing about him. His soft hair with a vanilla scent was like heaven to Shiro's hands, and he buried his head in the younger boy's neck.

The notes lied on the floor forgotten while the two of them just enjoyed the other one with small and sweet touches of affection. When Lance moved a little and kissed him in the forehead, he couldn't stop the tears, feeling the love of the other one in that small gesture, it was almost intoxicating. He didn't know how much he needed this, he needed him, his warmth, his freshness. These small things that made Lance so perfect.

For the first time in a long time, Shiro was feeling so fresh and alive. Like every piece was finally at the right place. It's okay now. Everything will be alright. Because he had the universe in his arms.

[ganymedesclock]

I was thinking about s5 and the development of Lotor and Allura’s feelings and thinking about one of the major reasons why I don’t think Lotor is manipulating Allura.

If you look at it... There is something of an imbalance of power here, but it doesn’t flow in Lotor’s favor.

It flows in Allura’s.

There’s really no positive sentiment between Lotor and Allura while he’s an antagonist in s3 and s4, and before she thinks she can trust him in s5. The closest is in s3e3 Lotor expresses respect for Allura’s capabilities and strategy, and she’s the one to outfox him on Thayserix.

In s5e1 and s5e2, we see that Allura is distant to Lotor, fairly aloof to his propositions. She’s doubtful of him, she’s clear about her position, and she doesn’t let him off the hook for any test he can’t pass. And she can do that- Allura commands an army at this point, she’s surrounded by allies in her bastion of power. Lotor, we see, very obviously doesn’t have the power to stop things he doesn’t want to happen... and while the duel with Zarkon ends, barely, in his favor, it’s clear that was never a gamble he wanted to take. 

There are too many terrified, vulnerable shots of Lotor in both that fight and the exchange leading up to it. The confident expressions Lotor makes in s5e1 are rather practiced and stilted compared to his more casual demeanor in s3, and if you watch him closely in the scenes, you can see how tense, how flinchy, how hesitant he is- how repeatedly the camera emphasizes  the thing he’s confined in and his inability to even stand that close to the paladins, who in every scene outnumber him.

And s5e2 contains the flashback via Haggar that shows us Lotor’s childhood, and it just frankly furthers the theme of Lotor feeling helpless, trapped, and afraid, the way he tries to disguise it, but the youngest, most ‘raw’ form of Lotor we see...

is just screaming and screaming and screaming. Helpless, terrified, miserable, in an environment overwhelmingly bereft of sympathy and comfort. He has a pillow and a single blanket and some kind of medical device studying him- no doctors, no nurses, no sign of Zarkon. As I’ve said many times before, this is a depiction of a neglected child.

That’s significant to me, even though Allura’s not privy to it, nor is it part of an interaction with her. Because frankly, if the point of this was to establish Lotor as a manipulator, Lotor as worming his way into Allura’s favor such that, in event of a twist betrayal we can go back and go “you were a snake all along, you asshole!” ...they’re dwelling an awful lot on Lotor’s helplessness and vulnerability. Lotor who doesn’t even celebrate his victory over Zarkon, but merely stares at his body grimly, and enters an emotional quagmire he only reluctantly pulls himself out of in the next episode.

And that thread only continues.

S5e3′s opening scene is when positive interactions between Lotor and Allura pick up in earnest. Allura’s powerful position hasn’t changed- if anything, she’s been handed a major victory with astonishing lack of sacrifice. None of her soldiers were on the field actually facing Zarkon- she, Lance, and Hunk did cover fire, but the only person who was injured and would require medical attention afterwards was Lotor.

This is our first soft interaction. Lotor, sitting, not engaging or speaking to anyone, and it’s not clear how long he’s been like this. His responses are terse, his posture is very closed. He’s not, in any real way, signaling Allura to take pity on him- he doesn’t seem uncomfortable as much as very, very distant, and we’ve seen enough of Lotor to know that’s a distress sign from him.

But Allura can tell he’s upset, and she’s willing to suspect maybe she misjudged his trustworthiness- so she speaks kindly to him, tries to hearten him. And then the rest of the team arrives, Lance and Coran both react potentially hurtfully (which Lotor doesn’t engage with) and Lotor pushes the concept of the Kral Zera, clarifying his concern.

Killing Zarkon hasn’t solved everything- it’s gotten them out of a frying pan and into a fire that they’re not ready for and Lotor’s tense, sure something bad is going to happen. And he’s basically absent for the rest of s5e3, picking up in...

S5e4.

At this point, it’s established the team’s at least listening to him. (They’re not agreeing with his stated importance of the Kral Zera and being there, per se, but they’re listening to him). We’d expect to see a manipulative Lotor increasing in confidence- starting to assert himself more over this new domain. And while Lotor is a bit peppier than he was after Zarkon, this is where we also see the start of an interesting thread for Lotor.

He hesitates. Repeatedly. First when clarifying the importance of Planet Feyiv, then again when he intends to show them the main contenders for the throne- he stops and asks Allura permission to use her computer. He’s hopeful about the idea of turning Voltron to an advantage, and when this leads the team to argue and split...

The hesitation and uncertainty Lotor seems to feel here are not designed to tug Allura’s heartstrings, or we would see him exclusively directing them to her, or emphasizing them to catch her attention. He isn’t.

Trend continues in s5e5- here’s where I see a lot of people metaing about how Lotor is manipulative, and I think that’s mis-attributing something that does start in earnest in that episode. 

That is to say: Lotor, newly on the throne, becomes anxious for Allura’s approval.

Compared to how haughty, snappy, and guarded he was to everyone at the Kral Zera bar the paladins, when he greets the team at central command, he emphasizes the banner he erected and its significance. There’s an obvious, veiled “Do you like it? Please say you like it.”

He stresses the alliance so much, about the idea that they could have that golden age the original Voltron created again, this time without the nasty ending, and he puts so much emphasis on everything they could be to Allura. Yeah, this could be really manipulative if we had a lot of evidence it was swaying Allura all that much.

But Allura really doesn’t change her stance from where she started in s5e3, that, maybe she misjudged Lotor as an ally and she’s willing to at least hear him out as long as he seems reasonable. We’re getting, at best, some mild indicators of interest from her- threading her arm in Lotor’s while they walk together.

But just this, “I misjudged you, maybe you’re trustworthy, maybe you’re actually sort of interesting and charming,” is such a subdued and casual response to what Lotor is doing.

Because the person really dropping his guard big time, sharing all these personal details relatively quickly, opening up in these very vulnerable ways and, again, becoming very focused on, and needy for, Allura’s approval, is Lotor. The person who you could accuse of being naive in love, swept up in how fascinating they find this other person, putting themselves in a vulnerable place, is Lotor.

Lotor’s pretty clear in s5e5 that he needs Allura. That he thinks she’s special, that everything he’s worked towards, she’s the answer. She’s the key, if there’s a way to continue the tradition of Altean alchemy it’s her, that he needs to get her to Oriande so she can meet her destiny, and then, ideally, Miss Talented will still like him enough to lend him her special gift.

Lotor’s shocked by his own markings and has to rapidly derail and reevaluate his plans. He’s completely sure of Allura’s markings and takes it as an opportunity to talk up how special and magical Allura specifically is, like... his own face isn’t glowing right there.

And it’s also very easy for Lotor to give up on Oriande after being rejected by the White Lion, to say that it was meant exclusively for Allura. But while they’re there, we see, again...

The combination of Lotor making his personal feelings very open, and himself very vulnerable, to Allura, and doing so in such a way that he’s obviously not signaling her to comfort him. He draws away from her, he frames himself in this unflattering light.

There’s an obvious imbalance where Lotor’s very quick to emphasize that Allura’s so important, he needs her, he can’t accomplish any of this without her help... but the two times Allura says she’s grateful Lotor’s helping her, he’s obviously caught off-guard.

Sure, there are manipulative people who try to make themselves out to be a victim to their target, but I don’t think that’s what Lotor’s doing. Again, he has a lot of opportunities to signal Allura to comfort him, or try to tug on her sympathies, and while he’s nearly oversharing, we can see that things that would make Allura regard him in a positive light, like his Altean heritage, don’t come out first or even are given particular priority or emphasis.

Furthermore, the colony story actually sets up a parallel between Shiro and Lotor, that Lotor views himself as a failed hero. More than Zarkon’s fault for sweeping in and destroying everything, it’s Lotor’s fault that he wasn’t smarter, faster, had better resources to stop it from happening. People were counting on him and he let them down.

It’s very similar to how Shiro frames the Kerberos mission. Both times, they’re hopelessly outgunned, the empire is attacking for very petty reasons with nothing to gain. And Shiro emphasizes that he let down Sam and Matt Holt, that “my team was captured once, I’m not gonna let it happen again.” Shiro dwells on their fate... even though now that we have all three of them, we can see obviously that Shiro definitely suffered the worst of it. Sam was a little scraggly and scared but untouched physically, Matt has a single aesthetic scar, but both of them were seemingly disregarded as rank and file prisoners.

Shiro was the one who lost a limb, had his face carved open, was tortured and experimented on in a way causing him lasting negative symptoms both physical and mental. But he focuses very little on what he endured.

In that sense I have to think there’s a lot Lotor’s not telling Allura when he simply says he was “sent away” but lingers heavily on the destroyed colony. Especially because we’ve never seen Zarkon excuse someone from a post that he doesn’t like without immediately either killing them, or handing them off to Haggar, and given his disinterest in cultivating an heir, it’s pretty unlikely he’d hesitate to hurt Lotor.

This makes me pretty sure they’re not setting us up for a Prince Hans moment. Especially when much has already been made of Allura’s arc that she’s struggling to relearn to trust people. It makes no sense when the show puts so much importance on “we are always stronger together” and when Allura did everything right, and never gave Lotor any trust he hadn’t earned, to punish her for that.

I’ve said before I don’t think Allura and Lotor’s partnership is going to consistently work all the way through to the end- I think that we’re going to get something similar to ATLA’s Crossroads of Destiny, where Lotor breaks from the paladins and returns to being an antagonist for a while.

But not, I think, painlessly, and not in a way that he never cared. Because if anything, what we see is that Lotor’s more emotionally invested in this than Allura is. Which makes sense! If the implications of “relationship” and the way the writers talk about it suggest that what’s going on here is actually puppy love... Allura’s had crushes before, she’s had people interested in her before. It’s not particularly a commodity or novel. Again, her response to Lotor is fairly banal once she takes a shine to him, just, “well, you’re actually sort of charming, this is a pleasant surprise. And not bad-looking, now that I think about it.”

Lotor? We actively see that Lotor’s been systematically deprived connections. It’s hard for him to trust enough to connect with people. Allura being kind to him, in ways that she thinks of as only the proper response? Catch him by surprise, he’s unused to this. And it’s clear to him, Allura is such an amazing person, he really can’t do any of this without her. She’s living the culmination of so many of his personal dreams.

If anyone has an overly romantic, idealized view of the other person, if anyone here’s kind of swept off their feet by how amazing this all seems... it’s not Allura.

(And I know, I’ve aired the theory they’re cousins before, but if that’s not canon, I think it does seem like the writers are trying to signal some romantic tropes around Allura and Lotor)

[parchmints]

JuLance Day 29 - Compliments

Check out my thread on twitter to see all the prompts at once (the tumblr app messes with formatting so I recommend twitter if you’re using mobile)! All prompts connect together to form one overarching story!

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day 29/31 - Compliments

Lance’s Little Book of Good Things

Day 29: Compliments

Lance’s Little Book of Good Things

Day 33 of Space Roadtrip, Red Lion

Okay!! So here’s the deal. Shiro told all of us that we should keep a journal to “ground ourselves” while we make the looong journey back to Earth, so that’s what I’m doing! I didn’t do it for the first month or so cuz I wanted to actually write ya know? Everyone else is just using their tablets but, I don’t know...I wasn’t really feeling it. I think it’ll just feel better to do it by hand. Red didn’t have any pen and paper tho, so I had to wait until we landed on a planet that had some.

It took a month to find one. Ugh, it was so long. Being in the Lions for a week is gross and I’m not gonna get into it, but just know it’s gross. BUT ANYWAY. We landed on a planet called Hovenduhl and there was a super nice prince there who watched the Voltron show and let us stay at his castle for a few days! I asked him about writing supplies and he gave me a bunch! The notebooks he gave me are pretty similar to the ones we have on Earth, but the pens are so cool! They have different ink colors and some of them are shiny, some of them are matte, and some of them glitter! They’re actually a lot like glitter pens but they don’t give out after like five seconds and they write really well.

So my plan with this bad boy is to write the good things that happen on the space roadtrip! With everything that happened with Shiro and Lotor (hate him), it’s been...hard. And the roadtrip is hard. So, I’m gonna write about good things to keep my spirits up! That way I can look at it when I need cheering up! I probably won’t write every day, but I still think it’ll be nice.

P.S. I’m counting a “day” as the moment I wake up to the moment I go to sleep. Time in space is...weird.

Day 35 of Space Roadtrip, Some Asteroid

I had sword training with Keith today! He’s kind of a lousy teacher and he constantly sends me flying (mainly cuz I let him--wouldn’t want him to feel threatened by what a natural I am), but he told me that as long as I keep practicing, I could be really good! Which, I mean, obviously…

Day 42 of Space Roadtrip, Red Lion

Yorak hung out in Red with me today! He put his head on my lap!

Day 54 of Space Roadtrip, Jungle Planet

We found a planet with lots of hanging fruit, so I was shooting them down and Krolia said I had “impressive aim”! It was really nice. I like Krolia a lot. She’s so cool, I kinda can’t believe Keith is her son...but then she’ll make a broody face and I’m like “oh, yeah”.

Day 60 of Space Roadtrip, Red Lion

Been kind of a rough week. We’ve been flying in the Lions for a long time and no one’s really up for talking. We’re running out of things to say, I think. I’m not a big fan of that if I’m honest. It gives me too much time to think. BUT ANYWAY! Pidge says we’re near an inhabited planet so I’m excited for that!

Day 61 of Space Roadtrip, Baskval

WE LANDED ON A PLANET AAAAAAA!!! It’s been a while! The locals kinda look like cockroaches but they have beds (actual beds!) so I’m in no way complaining.

Day 67 of Space Roadtrip, Some Asteroid

Today was...something. I talked with Shiro today and he said...a lot of really nice stuff. I actually kind of ran here after so I could write it all down because I want to remember this for the rest of my life so here goes…

I’ve been feeling...really bad about how I couldn’t really help Shiro when he was stuck in the Black Lion. He tried to tell me what was happening, but I didn’t listen couldn’t hear him. At least not all the way. And we finally talked about it today. I think it was a long time coming. I thought about that moment a lot, especially when we’re just traveling in the Lions. Anyway, he told me that I shouldn’t feel bad since I didn’t have a direct link to the Black Lion like he and Keith did and the fact that I heard him at all gave him hope.

He also told me that I stepped up and was always thinking about the team and that I’m gonna be a great leader and that he’s proud of me! Okay, I think that’s all he said…

I mean, he also said I was a hero which...man.

It’s crazy. I looked up to Shiro even before the Garrison--the guy’s a legend! When I saw that he was gonna be one of our instructors, I nearly lost my mind, but I could never really get his attention. I mean, it was hard to get any of the instructors to pay attention to you when Keith was around. Probably why I didn’t really like him at first...BUT WHATEVER!! Shiro called me a hero and that’s gonna fuel me for WEEKS!!!

Day 82 of Space Roadtrip, Some Asteroid

PIDGE GOT KILLBOT PHANTASM IV WORKING IN GREEN!!! We played for hours today and it was the best!!

Day 91 of Space Roadtrip, Dead Planet

I finally was able to knock Keith down in training today!! He was a little annoyed but he said good job and that I was really improving. I’m really happy because we’ve been working hard at it. Keith is a much better teacher now too!

Day 102 of Space Roadtrip, Auria

I want to start this off by saying I’M GOING TO KILL KEITH!!! He made me go sprinting after a little alien girl when I didn’t have to! He’s such a jerk…

BUT ANYWAY!! THE GOOD STUFF: We were on this planet called Auria (it was really pretty!) and there was this little alien girl named Aefee who said I was her favorite Paladin!! We talked a little bit and she was really sweet :)

Kinda made me miss Hilario and Ana, but it’s okay! I’m on my way to see them!

Day 115 of Space Roadtrip, Planet With Food We Could Cook

helped Hunk make dinner out of some weird veggies we found on the planet we landed on and he said I had excellent chopping technique! Mamá used to say the same thing when I helped her cook!

P.S. I’m starting to realize a lot of these entries are just me saying when I get compliments...WHAT CAN I SAY I like it when Lancey Lance gets the appreciation he deserves!

Day 134 of Space Roadtrip, Some Asteroid

More training with Keith today! Our fights are starting to feel a lot more even now! And by even, I mean Keith’s almost as good as me! Might even surpass me one day...but oh well, he still can’t shoot for beans.

Day 152 of Space Roadtrip, Red Lion

I don’t talk much about this here cuz it’s not really happy and I try to keep things positive when I’m journaling, but I talked to Allura today and for the first time in a long time, I felt okay? Like...I’ve been really sad about how we weren’t ever gonna be a thing and I still really liked her, but I think it’s starting to be okay. We just talked and it was kind of the first time I was like “okay we’re friends and I’m not wishing for something more” since I decided I needed to give it up. I don’t know, it just felt good. I’m moving on and I still get to hang out with Allura and have fun with her so can’t complain!

Day 171 of Space Roadtrip, Some Asteroid

I FINALLY WON A ROUND OF KP4 AGAINST PIDGE!!! She was really mad at first but then she was like “good game”. Think she’s kind of excited she has competition, actually...

Day 180 of Space Roadtrip, Hybitius

Uh, okay wow. Lot happened today. Like a lot...not all good either, but okay.

So we went to this planet called Hybitius and they have this craaazy carnival with all these thrill rides that make Hunk puke just looking at them and it’s AWESOME!! Keith and I were the only ones with the guts to actually go on them so we spent like, the whole day together and it was...really nice.

We ended the night on this ferris wheel and Keith started talking and he kept saying really nice things like I was there for him and I’m an amazing person and stuff like that and I...ugh this is even hard to write out...but I almost kissed him? And for a second I thought he kinda wanted me to too but the ride was over before I got a chance, which was probably good. Keith probably didn’t want me to kiss him and…

GOD!!! I like Keith!! I like him!! This is so stupid!! When did this even happen?! I mean, I guess we’ve been getting closer because of training...and I guess I’ve always kind of thought he was cute since the Garrison BUT I NEVER LIKED HIM!

I don’t know, I think I’m sad. I know Keith won’t like me back, so I guess I just gotta get over it. Good thing is that I have experience with that so…

Day 215 of Space Roadtrip, Uninhabited Planet

I keep staring at Keith, according to Hunk, but apparently, Keith keeps staring at me too. I don’t know what that means.

Day 220 of Space Roadtrip, Some Asteroid

I think Keith almost kissed me. I’m not sure. We were training and things got a little carried away and...I don’t know. I think...maybe he does like me? I guess I think it’s possible now and that...makes me really, really happy.

Day 222 of Space Roadtrip, Some Asteroid

Keith doesn’t like me. He likes someone else. Pidge told me.

Good thing is that I’ve started “Operation: Get Over Keith” immediately.

Day 223 of Space Roadtrip, Some Asteroid

Operation: Get Over Keith is not going well.

Day 234 of Space Roadtrip, Red Lion

Hunk said something that made Keith laugh over comms today and it was so cute I thought I was gonna have a heart attack.

Day 255 of Space Roadtrip, Some Asteroid

Sorry, it’s been a while. I think the trip’s kind of getting to me. It’s been so long. I’m trying to keep my spirits up for everyone, so I don’t have the energy for lots of journaling...especially about good things.

Sorry, that sounded really negative. I just...want to get home.

Day 269 of Space Roadtrip, Uninhabited Planet

Whenever we land, Keith and I always train and lately, he always come to sit and talk with me. We’re talking a lot, actually. He’s so cool. I mean, I always knew that, but he’s not just cool in an “awesome-pilot-crazy-samurai” way but in a “you make me feel better when I’m sad about something” way too.

We talk about a bunch of stuff, but it usually ends up being about our families.

Suffice to say, Operation: Get Over Keith is still not going well.

Day 283 of Space Roadtrip, Red Lion

Pidge says we’re not close to Earth, but we’re close to being close to Earth. I don’t really get it, but I’ll take it. Pidge thinks we’re close to making a breakthrough and once we do, the rest of the trip will be easy!

Day 298 of Space Roadtrip, Some Asteroid

Keith smiled at me today and it was an attack on my person. Personally.

O:GOK still not going well.

Day 306 of Space Roadtrip, Red Lion

PIDGE DID IT!! SHE KNOWS HOW TO GET US BACK TO EARTH!! IT’S ONLY GOING TO TAKE US LIKE A MONTH TO GET HOME!! EAAAARTH!!!

AAAAAAAAAAAA!!!

Day 312 of Space Roadtrip, Red Lion

We’re trying to limit our time on the ground as much as possible so we can get home sooner, which is hard, but I’m not complaining! LET’S GET THERE!!!

Day 325 of Space Roadtrip, Desert Planet

Had to take a break finally. We had a good run for a while but it was time.

Keith and I talked about everything we wanted to do once we got home and at some point I just kinda hugged him. He didn’t seem to mind, though.

As always, O:GOK is not going well. Kind of just failing miserably at this point.

Day 340 of Space Roadtrip, THE MILKY WAY GALAXY

YOU READ THAT RIGHT JOURNAL!!! THE MILKY WAY!! WHICH MEANS WE’RE MINUTES FROM HOME!!! I’M GONNA SEE MY FAMILY! I’M GONNA SEE THE OCEAN! I’M GONNA EAT PIZZA AND GARLIC KNOTS AND ICE CREAM AND MAMÁ’S EMPANADAS AND I HAVEN’T STOPPED SCREAMING!! I’M SCREAMING RIGHT NOW!! THEY’RE TELLING ME TO STOP BUT I WON’T!

I think this is gonna be my last entry, at least for now! I’m gonna be too busy on Earth to be able to write, but thanks for being there for me buddy! Writing in you really helped, actually.

EARTH!! WOOHOO!!

Love,

Lance