#yeah label the book on the left naruto and the book on the right naruto but the akatsuki had therapists

[josecariohca]

Op I’m going to go on a bit of a tangent, I hope that’s okay. I’m just so ridiculously fond of this character that I have to chime in. It’s a bit all over the place, but just roll with me here.

Like this was the Tsuchikage’s own student, and while Onoki is a great character, the dude is objectively a dick. And we have no idea how long Deidara actually trained under him for, or how the two met in the first place.

Deidara is so, SO insanely intelligent, he has an absurd pain tolerance, and he worked closely with bombs and explosives--this is very clearly not a kid who was raised delicately. He had MAYBE all of one friend in his life (who was also directly related to his teacher) (and he seems indifferent to grumpy with her at best) (but he’s also dead and captured at the time, so, ya know) (I’d feel hostile in that situation too).

He was likely raised in an environment where he was killing people before he actually knew what that meant, and doing so in a very violent, horrific way. I cannot imagine what that would do to his psyche, let alone adding the pressure he likely faced from the head of his village, AS WELL AS the social isolation he likely experienced. 

But this guy really just got screwed over and screwed over. ALL he ever wanted to do was be an artist, he wanted to appreciate art, and have his appreciated in return. He was taken in the Akatsuki when he was 14 and he was appreciating architecture, and he SAYS he just wanted to appreciate the architecture, and then he got bodied by a pair of eyes and he comes out of that experience SEEING IT AS ART. Like he is such an open and perceptive character!!! He sees art in everything (whether he sees it as good art or bad art is another conversation, but I digress).

And he gets paired up with the one other person who could possibly understand where Deidara is coming from, who also had trauma in his life and used art as a means of coping, and of course he has the entire opposite viewpoint. Deidara is vocal about how much he respects Sasori. He’s vocal about how he sees Sasori as the better artist. And because of that, he is constantly asking for Sasori’s approval. And that’s not to say Sasori is cruel to him, there are some examples of Sasori either flattering Deidara, defending him, or giving him credit, but damn near every conversation they have is either bickering on what art is or Deidara asking for Sasori’s opinion on something he did.

What part of any of that reads as traumaless? To me, it reads as a desperate, frustrated child who so aggressively craved validation (and who wouldn’t?) that it caused him irreversible damage, so much so that he didn’t care if he used his own body to blow a 10 km crater into the Earth, as long as it meant somebody would appreciate it. And that seems pretty tragic to me.

deidara is not traumaless

i keep seeing people say that deidara is the one akatsuki member without trauma for some strange reason. couldnt be farther from the truth considering how he acts + his backstory, so im going to sum up his personal issues real quick.

deidara grew up with absolutely none of his peers taking him seriously or giving him any kind of respect or recognition for what hes passionate about. he was basically the laughing stock of his village. eventually it caused him to develop such a deep inferiority complex that it pushed him into pathological narcissism.

his personal issues are fairly obvious because he yells about them the entire time, but what he seeks is recognition from his peers that he simply never gets. he was pushed to join the akatsuki at a very young age and partnered with sasori, who did not take him seriously whatsoever, but at least was an artist himself and shared many of deidaras beliefs. alas deidara had someone to talk to about his passion, albeit in an argumentative manner (which was just a bickering ritual at some point). when deidara fought itachi and lost he saw "true art" in his sharingan that defeated him, he recognized itachi as superior in his internal hierarchy and became fixiated on that narcissistic wound. he worked on creating a gadget for his eye that would counteract the sharingan.

he developed suicidal fantasies at some point when he created the C0 last-resort technique. those were less about the genuine wish to end his life, but once again about the need for recognition by blowing himself up in a cataclysmic explosion and hoping that someone would notice. nevertheless he pulled it through when he fought against sasuke, who once again completely dismissed him. during the fight the old wound by itachi surfaced again and he went haywire trying to disprove the uchihas superiority over him.

deidara is a tragic character, he unfortunately never met his goal even in his death. so yes, he is definitely deeply traumatized, like the majority of akatsuki members.

[sup-hoes-its-me]

Hi hun! Hope you’re doing well! Could a request a Shikamaru fic! I was thinking maybe it’s obvious to everyone that Shikamaru and Reader like each-other (except themselves of course). But a mission where they have to pretend to be a couple and they finally confess.

😘

Pretenders (Shikamaru x Reader)

A/N: another request. Im not super proud of this one, i really got stuck halfway through and i think that shows here. Thanks for requesting though, and hopefully you still enjoy. Trigger Warning for sexual assault.

word count: 6500

“So, you two set out on a mission tonight right?” Ino asked, leaning her cheek in her hand, nodding toward her two friends across the booth.

“Yep. Supposedly 3 weeks,” Y/N told her. “I won’t get to see you guys for so long.” The girl took a quick sip of her lemonade and sighed. It was a substantial amount of time. It’d been a while since she’d gone somewhere so intensive.

Shikamaru and Y/N had only a couple more hours before they were to be briefed on the details of otheir next mission and whisked away to a far away land for yet another tedious job. Y/N was perfectly fine with the premise of going on a 3 week mission, she’d been home too long and longed for some kind of adventure. She still wasn’t sure the caliber of the mission, nor did she even know where or what they were doing, but she was excited nonetheless.

Shikamaru, of course, wasn’t too fond of the entire idea. Yes, he was more than happy to find out his mission partner was Y/N L/N. Out of all the people he could have been paired with, she was most definitely the least annoying. He really felt like Kakashi had his back lately with missions, giving him ones that were semi decent, and sending him out with his friends. He was certainly grateful for the Hokage’s assignments.

Choji added from his spot near the wall, taking a second away from munching on his lunch. “It won’t be so bad. You guys have each other, after all. How could things get boring when you have your little girlfriend with you, Shikamaru, am I right?”

“Choji…” Shikamaru groaned, pressing his fingers to either side of his temples. These sorts of things borhered the hell out of him. The constant teasing from everyone, not just his teammates, but literally teachers, other squads, his mother, her grandmother. They weren’t dating. They never were dating.

Yet every person in this damned town was under the assumption there was something going on between them. Really, he was just trying to live his life.

Did he want to date her? Yes, a million times over, yes. She was literally perfect, he couldn’t imagine himself with anyone else. But was Y/N at all interested? Definitely not. She was more oblivious than Naruto was with Hinata, and that’s saying a lot. She seemed to ignore everyone when they made jokes, she thought all his measly attempts at flirting were just normal conversation even when he treated Ino completely differently. She wasn’t a dumb girl either. She was smart in her own right.

That’s why he’d begun to think she was maybe avoiding his advances on purpose. That she didn’t like him and she was trying to let him down easy. It was stupid really, and he wished she would just come out with it already, tell him to his face that she just wanted to be friends. It was frustrating, to say the least, but he kept trying.

He could safely say he hadn’t felt this way for another girl in his entire life, and he wouldn’t give up that easily. He really just wanted other people to mind their business. That’s the reason he shot down all the jokes and comments from his friends. They didn’t need to know about his lovelife, that was personal.

Ino smirked, tossing her ponytail over her shoulder and letting a laugh leave her lips. “Come on, Choji. You know how Shika feels about you teasing him.”

“Fine. But you gotta admit it’s funny.”

They continued on with their conversation, Shikamaru groaning at their jokes and the other two laughing the entire time. That was how it usually went. Y/N just listened quietly, sipping away at her lemonade. Those two, his teammates, they always made jokes, it was normal. She was constantly labeled Shikamaru’s girlfriend, and each time he denied it. Over and over again. He didn’t let a single instance slide by.

That’s how she knew to avoid the subject. To keep her feelings to herself. There was no point in confessing to him when he was already so adamant at keeping their relationship out of other people’s mouths. She was a troublesome girl, anyone who thought he saw her as anything different was delusional.

So she kept quiet, just listening.

Each time someone joked, her stomach would turn and she would wait for him to say something, for him to admit they were right, for him to get flushed in the cheeks, for him to reach out and hold her hand and confess his feelings, and each time she was let down brutally. After enough times getting her heart broken, it was only inevitable she give up this false hope. There was no digging her way into his cold heart. He was so closed off, to get inside...it seemed like an impossible feat.

She wasn’t willing to fight for him anymore. It was tiring, and they never got anywhere.

After enough time, she stopped crying herself to sleep. She stopped talking about her crush with Hinata and Ino when the boys weren’t around. She still looked at him with all the love she had to give. He was the best man she knew, how could she not. She just stopped wishing for something that wasn’t going to happen. She stopped investing so much of her time and energy into a useless, pointless dream.

She was tired of running endlessly in circles, over and over again. All because of his dumbass.

Maybe with time, she could try and get over him. With time she could learn to like him the same way as all their other friends. It was always just the little things that would pull her back in every time. It was the walks home at night when she was tired, or she had too many drinks and he’d wrap his arm around her waist and hold her so tight to his side she could feel his heart beating. It was the times he’d lay beside her in the grass and run his fingers through her hair splayed out over the ground. It was the times he would hold her silently as she cried for her mother and father who’d died, and he would rub her back until she could breathe again.

Every single fucking time she got close, the moments she felt she might not be desperately in love with him anymore, he came right in and stole her heart again. It wasn’t his fault, he was just being a good friend, but God, did it hurt sometimes.

And it wasn’t Ino and Choji’s fault for talking about it. It was so fucking obvious she liked him. Y/N followed Shikamaru around like a lost puppy half the time, what else were they supposed to think? They were just wrong in their assumptions that she was anything more to Shikamaru himself. That the boy thought of her as anything more than a troublesome friend who was always needing help with something or another.

She drank the last bit of her drink and set down the glass. “We better be heading to the Hokage tower soon. It’s almost time, and he still has to debrief us and all, “ she told the boy at her right.

“Yeah. I’ll go get my bag from home first and we’ll meet up there?”

“Got it,” Y/N slid out of the booth and waved to her friends. “See you when we get back.”

“Bye, Y/N!” Ino called as the girl left the restaurant with her book bag over her shoulder. She sighed, sinking down into her seat and glaring over at the pineapple head across from them. “You gotta make your move on this mission, Shika. Stop being such a scaredy cat.”

“Listen, you guys don’t know anything about anything, okay? She doesn’t like me that way. She never has.”

“I never thought I’d have to say this, but you’re dumb, man,” Choji laughed. “She obviously likes you.”

“Yeah, yeah. All of you seem to think that but you don’t see how she is with me. We are purely friends. That’s it.”

“Whatever, man,” he waved off the boy’s stern reply and added, “ Have fun on your trip with Y/N. Hope you get lucky.” Those words caused Shikamaru to heat up from his neck to the tips of his ears and he promptly slid out from his seat, straightening his vest as he did so to try and calm himself. That was unnecessary of his friend to say, for sure.

He turned to them once more and nodded his head. “See you around.”

“See you!”

Now all he needed to do was get his things together and meet up with the girl of his dreams for their weeks long mission. Fun times. Especially now that his friends made him annoyed and frustrated with the entire situation again. He’d have to calm down before seeing her soon.

_______

“We’re doing what?” Y/N asked, staring down at their Hokage in disbelief. He’d been detailing their mission and everything seemed normal so far, infiltrating and learning information about a budding coup in a far away nation just on the edge of the Land of Earth and The Land of Wind. It seemed easy enough at first, but then he kept going.

Kakashi sighed. “I said, you two are to be disguised as a princess and her consort from the Land of Sunflowers. The leaders of this land are expecting these royal visitors and you will be taking their place.”

“So, like, he’s gonna be my husband?” she asked for clarification again. It wasn’t that she didn’t understand his words, it was that she didn’t want to believe them. This was her worst nightmare. They would have to pretend to be in a relationship? Shikamaru was going to hate this more than anything and it would be uncomfortable the entire time.

Why did Kakashi have to pick them two, of all his shinobi? Why?

“Yes. That won’t be a problem for two close friends such as yourselves. After all, that’s why I picked you. You have some kind of dynamic going I feel your targets will find believable.” Shikamaru cursed the heavens. Even the fucking Hokage thought they were involved. This was ridiculous. Now this long ass mission he was already dreading was made ten times worse with this awkward situation. “We’re not gonna have a problem, are we?”

It would be okay though. He just had to take a few deep breaths. That’s all.

“No, sir, of course not. I’m ready for anything you throw at me,” she declared, straightening her back and letting the heat fade from her cheeks. She was embarrassed, obviously, but she couldn’t let the Hokage know. It was easier talking to Kakashi though, much easier than Tsunade. Kakashi watched them grow up, he knew them personally from helping them train. That didn’t mean she couldn’t be flustered.

“You’ll take those bags with you. They have some more suitable clothing for royalty. Put them on when you get close to the village. Throw out any indicators you’re from the Leaf as well.”

“Okay.”

“You’re dismissed. Leave as soon as possible,” the gray haired shinobi told them. She nodded and threw the bag over her shoulder, tossing the other one over to Shikmaru who caught it and slung it onto his back. He definitely wasn’t happy about any of this, but maybe it was a sign.

Ino and Choji told him to confess his feelings to her on this mission. Kakashi just told them they would be pretending to be a married couple. As he watched her walking in front of him down the Tower stairs, her head just barely dipped as she absorbed all the information running through her mind, he wondered if maybe this was his opportunity. A make or break type scenario. He had three weeks to figure out how to tell her how he felt in a more direct way than he’d tried before.

He worked out all the scenarios and their outcomes in his head millions of times and every time they ended in disaster. For someone so great at strategy, he sure did struggle with this one.

“So, I guess we’re married now. Should we start kissing or something?” she asked awkwardly as they reached the bottom of the stairs, shifting back and forth from her toes to her heels. He stopped, more like froze, in his path and stared at her.

“Now you're just making it weird,” he replied. “We aren’t even there yet.”

“I know, I was kidding. Trying to lighten the mood, you know,” she grumbled, crossing her arms over her chest. Of course he would reply like that. He didn’t like her at all, he couldn’t even take a fucking joke. Had to get all upset over it like a baby, all because he was so set on never dating her ever, never even entertaining the thought. She rolled her eyes, “You don’t have to be so rude about it, geez.”

She kept walking before he could reply. He had a feeling this trip was going to be a lot worse than anyone had anticipated. He was nervous, grumpy, and preparing for the worst. In fact, what he really wanted was a nice long nap.

_________

The dresses that Kakashi packed for her were...extravagant to say the least. They flowed all the way down to her ankles, thick heavy hoop skirts embroidered from head to toe with symbols of the land of sunflowers. She felt strange with her shoulders exposed and her body on display in these outfits which were so unlike the pants and t-shirts she wore when she was back at home or on a normal mission. She wrapped a shawl around her shoulders and sighed, feeling at least a little covered.

Shikamaru had nice clothes, but they were nothing in comparison to her wild dresses and all the bright colors of the fabric. He looked semi-normal. She was jealous, admittedly, that he still got to wear pants and shirts. He said she looked good in the dress, he actually told her about a dozen times, reassuring over and over again that she looked fine, but she didn’t believe him. She wasn’t dainty, how could she look beautiful when she clearly didn't belong in something so delicate?

Still, when they walked up to the gates of the Land of Shadows, they were greeted like the royalty they pretended to be. They were swept away to the main castle to meet with the King and his wife. It was nearly dinner time, and they were to eat with them as a greeting. It made sense, but Y/N felt herself growing more nervous with the second. She didn’t know the first thing about being a princess, or acting like a monarch. All she knew was fighting and joking with her friends.

Not only that, but how could she convince them that she and Shikamaru were in a relationship? Y/N wasn’t sure they possessed the right dynamic and even if they tried, it would be obvious they were uncomfortable with each other. It was all making her heart race, and she had to take a few deep breaths as they entered the dining room.

But her companion...he knew what he was doing. He was going to put on quite the show, take advantage of the situation. If this week and a half was his only chance to hold Y/N in his heart, than he wouldn't let any opportunities slip by.

Without warning, she found that Shikamaru had reached over and wrapped her hand up in his bigger one, clutching at her shaking fingers. He was so steady, she found herself sinking into his touch. It was comforting, more so than she thought it could be, given the circumstances. His skin was just so warm and soft against hers, it was only natural she felt safer.

“Ah, Princess Ayaka, Duke Hisashi. It’s a pleasure to finally meet you,” a man called from his place at the table. His wife was sitting beside him, her soft smile only reaching her lips not nearing her eyes. Y/N caught that immediately. Her distance. Silently, she took note of that as the King approached them, extending his arms for an embrace.

“It’s an honor to meet you, your highness,” Shikamaru replied with a smile, an obvious fake one, but damn was he good. She watched as he hugged the man so earnestly, as if he’d sunken right into the role of consort without an issue. She’d have to ask him tonight how he was so good at acting.

“And your beautiful wife,” he extended his hand to the girl and she raised it hesitantly, receiving a soft kiss to the back of her palm. “Come take a seat. Dinner will be served soon.”

The pair took their seats beside each other on the opposite side of the table, Y/N directly across from the Queen, who looked up at her for merely a moment only to sigh and go back to fiddling with the curve of her wine glass. "Your highness," Y/N hummed to the woman who nodded.

"Oh what a dream, to be young and in love," she said. "I remember the days."

"Please dear! To me, you will always be my beautiful young wife! We share a love to last a lifetime," the king cheered, placing his hand over that of his wife's as he took his seat at the table. "I apologize for her gloom. She's been going through a rough patch. We are more than overjoyed to have you here."

"It's fine. We all have our bad days," the girl replied softly.

After a few minutes of small talk, just dipping their feet into the conversation, a couple servants brought out plates of food and wine bottles full of vintage drink truly meant for the highest of royalty. Compared to the plain sake she had drank at home, this was liquid gold dripping down her throat. Shikamaru sent her a warning look. Y/N was known to be quite the lightweight, and even a couple glasses of wine could send her into a tipsy stupor. He really knew her too well, so hyperaware of the things she did.

"So, how did you two meet?" their host asked, taking a moment away from the chicken in front of him. "It's said that you married for love, not arrangement. That's true?"

Y/N and Shikamaru hadn't been versed very well on the details, just on the basics. Her heart beat increased, stress building up. Her lies would have to be good.

"Yes. You've heard right. He was my friend before anything else. We met as children." That much she knew for sure after reading the mission summary.

"Oh wow. Childhood lovers. Very sweet," the queen sighed, resting her cheek in her palm.

Y/N would be lying if she didn't feel a bit of similarities between her own story and that of the real princess she was pretending to be. Shikamaru and Y/N grew up together, for as long as she could remember. She started to love him before she even really knew what love was. It only made sense she pretended to be a princess in the same situation.

And when he held her hand again, this time under the table, his thumb brushing over her knuckles so softly she thought she might melt. Her cheeks began to heat up under his touch and she smiled. It was so nice holding his hand, pretending to care about each other this way. Not that she needed to pretend.

Dinner droned on, and she continued to hold his hand the entire time, besides when they were spooning at their food. For once on a mission, it felt like they were completely at peace. Of course, they were both supposed to be analyzing the movements of everyone around them to make sure no one was planning a coup like Kakashi told them. But she couldn’t held but cherish the moments of calmness and warmth between everyone.

The King and his wife were genuinely some of the kindest people she’d ever met, whether they were just acting that way or not. It was a pleasure to have dinner with them, talking and laughing like an uncle would with his nieces and nephews. It had that same energy, talking to him.

“Hisashi, you wouldn’t mind accompanying me to my library? I have some books I think you might enjoy,” the man said, standing from the table. The rest of them slid out of their chairs after him, and she had to brush down her skirts to make sure everything was in line. It was tedious, wearing these outfits without any prior warning. She felt like a clown. The Queen was so effortless in her movements, how could she not feel stupid standing beside someone so regal?

“That sounds great, your majesty-”

“Not necessary. Call me Shoto, that’s my name after all, and you are an honored guest,” he laughed. He reached over and gave his wife a gentle kiss on the cheek before turning on his heel and heading toward the door. She really expected Shikamaru to just leave with just a simple goodbye, or a “I’ll see you tonight” kind of thing.

Definitely not this.

He was gonna go all out this time around.

“I’m going to kiss you now,” he whispered, just loud enough for only her to hear, over her shoulder into her ear. When his warm breath hit her skin, shivers ran up and down her spine. Her eyes widened and she turned to stare up at him, cursing herself when she felt heat rise up in her cheeks and burn the tips of her ears. Was he serious, or just teasing her? He always liked to crack jokes like that.

But when she felt his rough hand pressed to her cheek, lifting her face ever so carefully to meet his, she knew he wasn’t messing around. His eyes met hers for a split second, and she could have sworn he winked down at her before pressing his lips to hers.

Honestly, she thought she might have a heart attack right there in the dining room. Shikamaru was kissing her. It felt even better than she dreamed it would. Chapped lips running against hers, heat pooling in her stomach, heart pounding in her chest.

As soon as it started, though, the kiss was over, and he took a step back. "See you tonight, Princess."

She was keen on catching the smirk on his lips, and the way he laughed to himself as he walked out of the room with the King before him.

Y/N stood there silently, her fingers pressed to her lips, breath caught in her throat. The boy she’d wanted for so long just kissed her like it was nothing, and she was left all alone to deal with this predicament, all the feelings that came rushing in after. All she knew for sure, whether he was serious or not, was that she really, seriously liked him. She liked him a lot more than she thought.

And now they had a whole week and a half of fake kisses and hand holding to endure. Jeez.

__________

“You know, you’re nothing like the other princesses I’ve met,” the guard said to her as she waited for Shikamaru to show up. He was still out with the King practicing archery. Apparently that was a hobby a lot of these rich country men had. So far, she wasn’t suspecting a thing out of the King or any of his closest acquaintances. They were nice as could be and seemed sincere in their intentions toward the village alliances. She had no reason to suspect them, and was beginning to think a coup was just as Kakashi thought, a mere rumor.

That made things a lot easier.

She sighed, tapping her fingers on her wrist. She wasn’t a fan of having a guard watching her every second of the day, especially not the talkative ones. This one was strange. He gave off this energy she couldn’t describe as anything other than creepy.

“Yeah? That’s nice,” she muttered.

“It’s just, usually princesses are pompous, full of themselves, spoiled women. You aren’t the same,” he continued, even if it was obvious she wanted him to shut up and go about his business while she did hers. She felt uncomfortable being alone in this land, without any of her weapons or the ability to fight back if someone was acting sketchy. She was forced to sit by like some little, ditsy princess just watching and observing.

Honestly, though, Shikamaru was probably having a great time. All he had to do was eat with the royalty, play board games, shoot some arrows, and then go to sleep. There was no extensive fighting or thinking going on, just sitting around observing and waiting for something suspicious to happen.

The queen would normally hang out with the female guests but thanks to her bouts of depression she stayed in her room, leaving Y/N completely at the mercy of time. So much time passed, and she was bored of it.

“I’m honestly just another princess. You’d be surprised though. Many princesses are just as modest as I am, it’s not all that uncommon,” she commented, taking a peek over at the man, only to quickly look away. He had quite the hungry look on his face, and if her eyes hadn’t deceived her, his own were trained right on her breasts. Damn these dresses.

Y/N wrapped her arms across her chest and slumped down, trying to hide herself from this weird man watching over her. Only, it seemed impossible. He was so much taller, could just look over her shoulder. She couldn’t run away and raise suspicion. She had to sit here and wait for someone else to break the tension.

She was scared.

“I meant that as a compliment. You say thank you when someone compliments you, yeah?” he mumbled, a firm hand reaching out to snatch her wrist. It hurt, his grip on her arm, and she winced at the feeling. “Say thank you.”

She bit her lip and refused to meet his eyes, instead focusing on his hands. If she needed to, she would defend herself but only to a small extent. She couldn’t blow her cover just because some guard was manhandling her. Take a deep breath, Y/N. It’s gonna be okay. Just calm down.

“T-Thank you,” she gulped, hoping he would drop her wrist. But he didn’t. He only held on tighter.

He smiled, yellow teeth showing through his thin lips. “See, you are a good girl, aren’t you?” he questioned, and she felt his other hand run up her waist. All she could do was whimper, shivers running up her spine and any skin this man laid his hands on. The only hope she had was that another guard come walking around and see them.

It was unlikely, but she prayed for a savior to make their appearance.

His hand worked its way down to her ass, and she felt him squeeze. Vomit rose up in her throat and she squirmed away, pressing herself against the wall as tight as she could so his hands had nowhere to go. Instead, he took to fondling her breasts in his hands. She could only bite her lips and feel the tears bubble up in her eyes as he pushed down the fabric of her top and pressed his filthy palms against her skin.

“What the fuck?” a voice cursed from behind them. The guard was torn off of her form and she brought up her hands to cover herself, tears still dripping thickly from her eyes as she cried, little breathy sobs leaving her lips. Shikamaru stood there, hands shaking at his sides as he glared over at the guard. “What’s going on here?” he demanded. Y/N watched as her friend turned red in the face, burning up with an anger she rarely saw from him, if ever.

“You tell me, your highness. Your wife seduced me!” the guard cried, clearly lying to cover himself and his sins.

The eyes of all three men, the guard, Shikamaru, and the King standing near the footwell of the stairs, turned to her. She just cried harder, shaking like a leaf in front of everyone. “He grabbed me and started to touch me, and-and I couldn’t do anything,” Y/N told them all through her pained cries.

The King marched up the steps and grabbed his guard by the arm, yanking him toward the doorway to enter the castle. He appeared worn from his workout, tired and sweaty, but he was awake enough to realize the severity of the situation. He bowed low to Y/N and her companion.

His apology ran thick from his mustached lips, “This is unacceptable. Honored guests, I apologize for everything that’s happened. I will take care of this, I assure you. Please, don’t hesitate to ask for anything you need tonight.” Shikamaru nodded, and they watched as the pair of men walked into the castle, no doubt to find another guard to incarcerate the guard in question.

Shikamaru turned to her and winced, seeing her dress pushed down below her breasts and the tremors running through her hands desperate to cover them. He watched as hot, heavy tears ran thick down her cheeks and her lips quivered and shook with fear and trauma. Gently, he moved her hands to the side and brought her dress back up to cover her chest. He worked carefully, making sure not to startle her or make things worse.

The woman sunk into his touch, leaning her head against his shoulder and sobbing. “It’s gonna be okay, Y/N. You’re safe now.” He wrapped his arms around her shoulders and tugged her close to his chest, pressing a soft, gentle hand to the back of her head to stroke her hair. “I’m so sorry. I won’t leave you alone again, okay?”

“Shika, “ she whimpered, “I’ve never felt so helpless in my entire life. I couldn’t do anything to defend myself and there was no one else around to help me. I-I didn’t know what to do.”

“I know. You must have been so scared,” he whispered. She just nodded against his shoulder, crying deeper into his chest. He hugged her tighter and swore to himself, even if he couldn't make it happen, that he would protect her. This kind of thing would never happen to her again if he had any say at all. “I promise this won’t happen again.”

"I've just never been in that position before. I always have the upper hand. It was awful. I was so scared and I wanted to cry for you to come help me but I didn't know where you were."

"God, I'm sorry," he mumbled, hugging her tighter in a desperate attempt to calm her shaking. He just wanted for her to be better, even if he knew that wasn't an option right now.

He felt so hopeless, knowing the only thing he could do was promise, to say things without any actual basis behind them. He was just whispering words to the wind hoping they would stick and he was right. He cursed himself for not being there in the first place to protect her, to make sure something like this never happened in the first place. He really was useless when she needed him the most.

He wouldn’t even argue if she said she wanted to go home, if she never wanted to see him again. He let her down. For the first time ever, he let her down in the most terrible, awful way he could think of. And now she was crying and he didn’t know how to make it better. He was really trash.

For now, all he could do though was hug her and promise her the world, all these things that might make her feel safe and comfortable, make her feel less alone and scared. It was the least he could do.

________

Finally, after a long evening of socializing and another huge dinner literally fit for a king, Y/N found herself stripping off her gowns and heavy undergarments, switching into something much lighter and comfortable for the night.

She was tired from the day. From being left alone for the good part of the morning just sitting in the sun waiting around. She was tired from the assault on her body by the guard whom was supposedly in jail right now for his actions. She was tired from all the crying and the shaking. She was just tired.

Shikamaru was out, finishing up drinks with the King and some of his subordinates for the time being, so she sunk down into the mattress near the far wall, curling up under the down covers and pulling a book from the table beside her. Anything to ease her mind for a while. She felt safe being alone in the confides of the bedroom, knowing that her friend was right down the hall if she needed him.

She scanned the pages of the novel quietly, humming each time she turned a page, leaning on her elbow so the pages would be illuminated in the candlelight.

After about an hour, the door slid open and her companion entered, shutting the door silently behind him. "You aren't asleep? I expected you to be after such a long day."

"I'm tired, but I'm not in the mood for sleep yet," she shrugged, still skimming through the pages of her novel. "Did you have fun?"

"Nah. It's such a drag having to hang out with that old man. He's nice but he never stops talking." He took off his coats and tossed them onto a chair, kicking off his heavy boots and thick socks. "Annoying, having to wear all this fancy shit too."

"Trust me, I know." She shifted over in the bed so he had more space to lay himself down, kicking out his legs and crossing his ankles. "Do you know what's on the agenda for tomorrow?"

He nodded, tilting his head ever so slightly to the side to peek at her face. His eyes slid down to the novel turned over in her hands and smirked, "Yeah. You've got book club. Have fun with that." She tossed her book back on the table beside her and instead curled further into the blankets.

His eyes caught hers and he smiled, one of those undeniably handsome intoxicating smiles she loved so deeply. "You know, you look kinda cute like that."

"Huh?"

He shrugged, "All curled up under the blankets like a little baby. It's cute. I'm just calling it how I see it."

If she wasn't flustered before, she definitely was now. He was undeniably making her feel some sort of way, and she was loving the attention. He was being so bold, so unlike him. She questioned what had compelled him to act like this, to say such things. They weren't in character anymore, it wasn't like he had to say these things.

"Thanks, Shika." She felt dumb but what was she supposed to say? She was overwhelmed. "But we're alone now. You don't have to act all lovey-dovey."

He crossed his arms beneath his head and sighed, eyes gazing up at the canopy. He mumbled, just loud enough to reach her ears, “When this is all over, I’m gonna miss you being my princess.” She peered over at him in the candlelit room, making out his faint silhouette in the darkness. Her heart fluttered in her chest at his sweet words. She never imagined in a million years Shikamaru would say these things to her, and now that it was happening she didn’t know how to react.

She dreamed of this moment for a while now. The thoughts of Shikamaru confessing his feelings and then her falling into his arms dramatically. It was a fantasy of hers, a guilty pleasure. Far too dramatic to ever be a reality.

That's why she was too shocked to meet his eyes. His princess. Those words made her woozy.

"What are you talking about?"

"You're not stupid. You know what I'm talking about," he said calmly.

"You don't want things to go back to normal?" Y/N asked, hesitant. She felt nervous, diving into these waters. Each words felt like it held so much weight. It was a puzzle, just finding the right thing to say, how to reply to his statement. "Just friends, like before?"

"Is that what you want?"

And when she really thought about it, he was right. She didn't want to go back to normal. She wanted to continue holding his hand, kissing his cheek and his lips, loving each other with their words and their gazes and all the little touches. She wanted all of this to last and as the mission came to a close, she found herself worrying for the future empty of all those things.

She shook her head, just barely able to bring her eyes up to meet his. He looked bored, but she knew he cared. He cared a lot, actually. "I-I think I'd like if we could stay like this."

"Falling in love with you, Y/N, was one of the easiest things I've ever done. Finding the right time to tell you, that's been troublesome," he confessed, blowing a stray piece of hair from his eyes. "You never seemed emotionally available, really."

"I always was. I was always waiting for you, Shikamaru. Ever since we were just teenagers, I've been waiting for you," she told him, letting her heart finally come out with her words. "I just thought you wanted to be friends. Before this mission, I had completely given up on being with you, but then everything seemed to fall into place on this trip."

"When Kakashi told us we would be married for this mission, I have to admit, I got excited." He rolled onto his side to face her. She was still curled up in her blanket, and he felt like he was melting. The most beautiful woman in the entire world right in front of him, his heart playing right into her hands. He was okay with that. He was okay with this girl having his entire soul if that meant he would see that smile and those eyes peering up at him.

He wasn't a romantic man. Far from it. But she brought out a side of him he'd only heard about from love struck novelists, such kinds Kakashi sensei would read.

"I just knew I'd have to shoot my shot with you," he finished, sending a wink her way. She truly was swoon, like putty in his hands. Her words came faster than she could think to stop them.

"Shikamaru, I think I love you. When you kissed me for the first time, I knew it was true. All these feelings for the past few years weren’t in vain. I love you."

"The feeling is mutual."

The girl crawled out from under the blankets and over to him on the other side of the mattress. Her arms wound around his neck and as best she could, she curled into his chest. Her ear pressed to his heart, beating loud and constant in her mind. He was more than happy to let her cuddle up to him, in fact, he relished in the feeling.

This is what he'd been missing out on all this time. The hugs. The cuddles. The looks in the dark full of love and longing. It was nice, to lay there with someone he knew for sure, without any doubt, loved him to the moon and back. He wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her tighter to his tired form, letting her sink further into his touch.

Kakashi knew what he was doing sending them. Two lovers with a mask over their emotions, straight into a game full of dancing around their feelings and pretending to be something they always wanted to be. Everything played out perfectly, a happy ending for a couple of worthy shinobi.

He was happy. That's all he could ask for.

[cherrynojutsu]

Title: Like Gold

Summary: Sasuke grapples with love and intimacy regarding his developing relationship with Sakura after returning to the village from his journey of redemption. Kind of a character study on Sasuke handling an intimate relationship after dealing with PTSD and survivor’s guilt in solitude for so long. Blank period, canon-compliant, Sasuke-centric, lots of fluff and pining, slowly becomes a smut fest with feelings.

Disclaimer: I did not write Naruto. This is a fan-made piece solely created for entertainment purposes.

Rating: M (eventual nsfw-ness)

AO3 Link - FF.net Link - includes beginning/ending author's notes

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Chapter 3/?: Focalize

It is a tranquil spring evening by the time Sakura appears within view behind the hospital's glass entryway, a blur of carnation and sage and ivory. It is just a few minutes past seven; it seems she is waving goodbye to what he assumes is the receptionist further into the building, out of sight. Then she’s pushing one of the doors open with her shoulder and coming into focus, pastel colors subdued in dusk.

Sasuke notices she’s carrying a plain tote bag, and that there are also two large books and what looks like something reminiscent of a magazine in her hands, neatly stacked and held to her chest. She is wearing a sweater that is slightly oversized, a desaturated green.

Her face lights up when she sees him standing there, leaning against one of the blue columns situated a few steps away, closer to the road; her expression belays something like a mixture of ardor and avidity, and as she approaches, he also observes her cheeks match her hair.

His heart swells pleasantly in his chest; any shred of loneliness he felt in the past few hours dissolves.

“Sasuke-kun,” she chimes in affectionate greeting as she ambles over to him, all lenity and upturned lips.

“Sakura.” Her eyes flash lighter, more vibrant, as she gets closer; they are reflecting glow from a nearby streetlight that flipped on promptly at seven, an electrified yellow-green.

There is a short moment in time where they just gaze at each other, scant amount of steps between them, an oblivion of chartreuse and charcoal in spring twilight.

“How was your first day back?” She finally asks, smiling up at him.

He thinks it over for a second as he studies her, a gentle breeze of springtide. “...Fine. I saw Kakashi and the dobe.”

Her smile shifts into a knowing one. “I’m going to guess paperwork and Ichiraku’s.”

He pulls the health screening forms out of his pocket in answer, and her dimple makes an appearance.

“You can come by tomorrow just after eight in the morning, if that works for you; I’ll be here.” Different hours than today, then, he presumes.

He feels he should clarify that she’s not coming in early just for his sake. “...Shouldn’t I make an appointment?”

Sakura shakes her head. “Thursdays and Fridays I don’t have appointments or surgeries until a little later in the day. The majority of those mornings are set aside for medical research and correspondence with some of the clinics. As long as it’s before eleven, I can step away from things for a bit.”

Research. Interesting. She hadn't mentioned much about that in her letters; he hadn't realized it was something she did regularly. “What kind of research?”

She blinks in surprise, and he thinks she looks a little sheepish. “...It depends. Right now we’re doing some longitudinal studies on mice; behavioral assessment in accordance with certain stimuli, neurobiological response, brain scans, that sort of thing... I’ve also got some poisons I’m looking at for antidote development, but they’re pretty rare, so it’s not super pressing.”

His eyes flick to the books in her arms, a silent question. Her lips quirk upwards even more, then; he tries not to focus on them for too long, because she’s shifting the texts so he can read the titles. The thin magazine-like one is labeled Progress in Neuro-Psychopharmacology and Biological Psychiatry; it must be a research journal. The top book reads Neuroanatomy Through Clinical Cases, and the other reads Molecular Mechanisms of Neurotransmitter Release.

“...Some light reading,” he comments dryly, his version of a joke, and he revels in her soft exhale of breath, a shy version of a laugh. He has missed it.

“I suppose. I actually need to return these; they’re almost due. I meant to do it yesterday, but...” She’s blushing again. Vivid eyes meet his hesitantly before sweeping away. “...I forgot.”

Heat edges up his neck.

“I… wasn’t sure what you wanted to do this evening,” she continues, pursing her lips a little as her fingers clutch the books closer to her again. “I thought maybe we could swing by the library? I’d like to take a quick look to see if they have some new things in yet; it shouldn’t take very long.”

Sasuke muses that Sakura absolutely is the type to visit the library regularly. He used to go often, when he was younger. He wasn’t checking out books of that caliber, though; he wonders how long she’s had them. He also ponders momentarily if rogue ninja status is enough for the powers that be to revoke your library card from the system. Probably.

He hasn’t been able to read regularly for awhile, being away; books have been unnecessary weight, something extra to carry, and also a distraction from what he was trying to accomplish. Though he would accompany her wherever regardless, he realizes he would like to start reading again. It would be something to occupy his free time, when she is busy.

He nods his assent.

“Okay,” she breathes, looking a little relieved and meeting his eyes again, luminescent jade. "They close at eight today, so we should probably get going."

He nods again, glancing down at the books still in her arms. He considers for a second, then holds his hand out. Sakura blinks in confusion, long lashes skimming her cheekbones.

“...I’ll carry them,” he offers, neck heating up again as she stares. “...If you’d like.”

Her skin blooms with color, darker than earlier. “Oh. Thank you.” She hands them to him carefully, soft fingers brushing his. Her touch is delicate, incredibly distracting; her glowing cheeks, even moreso.

She adjusts her bag over her shoulder and then turns; he falls into step next to her as if it's the most natural thing in the world.

They walk just east of the hospital, which tells him the library is likely still in the same location, despite Konoha’s changing landscape. Some of the buildings they pass along the way are under construction. That seems to be a recurring theme in the village right now; much of what he saw earlier today passing through with Naruto was the same. Sasuke wonders if the library will have expanded, too. He doesn’t think he’s passed by it, yet.

There are a few people milling about, but not nearly as many as earlier. He supposes the majority of residents must be retired for the evening, inside their homes with family. There are a few restaurants they pass that smell fairly appetizing, but Sakura doesn’t say anything, so he concludes he was right in thinking that she has eaten already.

“So, how were things with Kakashi-sensei and Naruto?” Sakura asks conversationally, peering up at him from his right. “Anything other than paperwork?”

Sasuke contemplates before responding. “...Naruto and I went apartment hunting.”

Pink brows furrow a little bit as she grins. “Did you invite him?” She asks, though he suspects by her expression she already knows the answer.

He shakes his head. “Kakashi mentioned it as I was leaving and he invited himself.”

She laughs, then, glancing in the direction of the mountain of faces at their old sensei. “Yeah, that sounds like him. He probably appreciated a morning with Naruto out of his hair. He’s been helping there a lot, when he’s not on missions.” She pauses, then adds, “I imagine apartment hunting with Naruto would be pretty draining, though. He’s gotten a little better at cooling it with the nonstop chatter since Hinata, but not by a ton.” She stops again, thinking, before inquiring, “Did you end up finding a place?”

Sasuke nods. “It’s north of here.”

She smiles again, then purses her lips as if she’s considering whether to say something more or not. Finally she adds, green eyes darting to his and then looking away shyly, “...Not too far away, then.”

His gaze softens. “...Not too far.”

They amble by a few street vendors selling gardening supplies, closing up carts for the evening; they must be doing fairly well, as all that’s left over from the day's plantable wares are saplings here and there, and a few starters, small labels detailing their required care poking up from the dirt containers they’re sitting in. There are several taller displays interspersed between carts, stocked with watering cans, spades, gloves, and the like. Sasuke thinks it is quite trusting of the merchants to leave their goods out overnight, evidently without fear that they will be stolen or damaged; many of them are walking away holding only money boxes. It speaks to the relative security of Konoha, in comparison to most of the places he's been.

“Did you get everything you needed for your apartment today?” Sakura asks him after they meander a few more steps.

He blinks. “...Mostly."

“Was there something in particular you wanted to do, after the library? We could stop by a store, if they’re open, and get what you're missing.”

He shakes his head, then admits, “I… didn’t have anything planned.” He worries, then, that maybe he was supposed to plan something. They’re together now, or at least he hopes they are; he'd kissed her, and he would like to, again, if they're alone. Maybe this should have been more formal. He then thinks he should answer the second part of her inquiry: a box and a drying rack would probably be easy to find at a general store, but the majority of places in Konoha that are open past seven only sell food. “...I think the store I went to closed at seven,” he adds.

Sakura looks as if she’s deliberating again. “What are you missing, still?” He notices she doesn’t seem upset that he didn’t plan anything; maybe it’s okay.

It takes him a moment to respond, carefully. “...A small storage box, and a laundry rack.”

She brightens. “I actually have a spare drying rack that I'm not using, if you want it. The washing machine in my unit broke in February, and when my landlady replaced it, she got a washer/dryer combo.” She thinks, then adds, “...And I think I have an empty shoebox in my closet; would that be big enough?”

Something like serendipity unfolds in Sasuke’s chest and begins to vine between his ribs. He thinks unbidden of the blooming cherry blossom tree he can see from his window, just within reach, if he only goes beyond the glass.

He nods. “...Thank you.”

Multifaceted eyes peer up at him warmly. “No problem.” Her cheeks darken again. “We could… walk for a while, and then swing by there at the end. If you want.” Her fingers are gripping the strap of her bag a little tighter. “I wouldn’t mind walking by your building at some point before that, so I… so I know where it is.”

Sasuke nods again, heart skipping a little. He had hoped she would show him where her apartment is tonight, too; he would like to walk her home. He also hopes ‘walk for a while’ means he gets to spend more time with her between the library and going by his building, before they go to hers.

He thinks maybe he should voice that. It comes out as a question. “...We could walk around a bit after the library?”

She’s gazing up at him with red cheeks and smiling with a gentle light in her eyes. “...I’d like that,” she murmurs.

His ears feel warm again.

They turn a corner, and then they are at the library. There is a small expanded portion of the building on the south side now, and it is painted a slightly different mauve-leaning gray than it used to be, but otherwise it appears the same. When they near the entrance, Sakura pulls open the door for him, since his hand is occupied.

“Thank you,” he says quietly, before they head inside, bell on the door jingling.

The librarian working at the front desk nods at Sakura in recognition as they enter, a fairly young woman with chestnut hair. The librarian Sasuke remembers was quite a bit older, elderly now that he’s thinking about it. He briefly wonders if she passed away in his absence. The thought makes him morose; he hopes she just retired. She had always been kind to him.

“Finished with those already, Sakura?” The woman asks, friendly and motioning to the books in Sasuke’s arm as he makes his way to the desk to set them down, Sakura beside him. She must know her well.

“Yes; the journal was interesting, this time. Very relevant to the experiments we're running, and much more substantial than the last edition.” There is something somewhat critical in her voice regarding the referenced last edition, as if something in it wasn’t up to her academic standards. She’s well within reason to be captious; she has become an expert in her field in a rapid amount of time, and if she’s doing research regularly, he’s sure she has the data to back up her assessment. He wonders just what kind of experiments she’s running that have to do with neuro-psychopharmacology; whatever they are, he imagines they must be complex.

The woman is wearing a name tag that reads Ichika, Sasuke can see now that they’re closer. Sakura pulls out what must be her library card from her tote bag; it’s connected to a lanyard with several keys and what he presumes is an ID badge for the hospital.

“Thank you," the librarian says as Sakura hands her card over. As she does so, the woman glances at Sasuke with brown eyes, and then back to Sakura, as if waiting for an introduction. “And this is?”

“This is Sasuke,” she answers, smiling, then adds, “Uchiha.”

“Welcome,” the woman named Ichika greets him, without any malice. Sasuke wonders if she just doesn’t know who he is, or if she’s being friendly because of Sakura’s presence. Maybe it’s because she’s a civilian.

“...Thank you,” he offers sincerely after a moment.

“It was nice of you to carry those books. I know from experience they’re quite heavy. My name’s Ichika.” She gestures to her name tag. “I don’t suppose you like to read as much as Sakura does?” Ichika laughs as she hands Sakura’s card back and starts scanning the books as returned. “I think by now there are more books in the library that she’s read than ones she hasn’t.”

Sasuke glances at Sakura knowingly, and she looks downwards bashfully for a second.

“...I like to, but I don't think I’d understand half of what’s in these,” Sasuke answers honestly, turning his gaze back to the librarian. He sees Sakura flush out of the corner of his eye.

Ichika laughs. Sasuke thinks then that she really must not know of his prior rogue ninja status. “I usually have her write down the titles of the books she’d like us to add, because I don’t know that I can even spell some of the words.” She squints at the last book. “ Molecular Mechanisms of Neurotransmitter Release. I haven’t the faintest idea what a neurotransmitter is, or what it would be releasing.”

Sakura smiles. “Neurotransmitters are the body’s chemical messengers. A release is when the neurotransmitter causes a response in the receiving neuron; they can be disrupted in diseases and biological toxins. Tetanus is a good example; it goes up synaptic terminals of interneurons where it blocks the release of inhibitory neurotransmitters. The result of the block is that motorneurons become overactive, and then cause muscle contractions and spastic paralysis, like lockjaw.”

Ichika blinks blankly. “I don’t know where you keep that information in your head, Sakura, because it certainly wouldn’t fit in mine. Guess I’ll try not to step on any nails in the meantime.” She’s shaking her head, but her tone is amicable. “Well, they’re all checked in, with a few days to spare. I left out the new journals and that other book you asked about in the usual spot, back in the Medicine section.”

Sakura nods, and the librarian’s gaze turns back to him.

"Would you like a library card?”

Sasuke is glad he won’t have to ask. “...I used to have one. I’m not sure if it’s still on file.”

“I can check our records, if you want to browse in the meantime. If it’s not still on file, we can set you up with a new one; you can take books today either way, if you find some you’re interested in.”

Sasuke nods; that was easier than he thought it would be. “...Thank you.” Ichika turns to approach a row of filing cabinets a bit further back behind the main desk area, he assumes to check for his name in their database; he turns to Sakura.

She’s smiling at him as if she wants to ask him a question, but she doesn’t say anything. When she turns to journey further back into the library, he follows. They pass through two interior rooms, organized by genre and alphabet just the same as they had been years ago. The shelves are a little fuller than they used to be; with the population expanding, it makes sense that they now have a wider selection available.

They turn a corner to another interior room, and suddenly he sees a familiar face. His replacement is hunched over in a corner, nose buried in a book that appears from its cover to be about painting. When Sasuke inspects the rest of the room, he sees that the majority of the books in this section have titles related to art.

“Oh, hey, Sai,” Sakura greets casually, heading over to him. Dark eyes glance up at her from his book. Seeing him here must be a regular occurrence, given her lack of surprise.

"Hello, Ugly,” he responds, somehow both cheerful and monotone all at once. Sasuke frowns. He’d been around Sai a few times following the war, before he left for his travels. He never liked his nickname for Sakura.

Sai then looks to him, still standing at the threshold of the room, keeping his distance. He knows him, but not well.

“Welcome back, Traitor," he adds, tone friendly enough. Sasuke supposes that one’s fair. He inclines his head minutely, hand in his pocket.

Sai twists his gaze back to Sakura. "Have you recovered from your birthday extravaganza?"

Sakura blanches and stiffens a little in surprise as Sasuke eyes her with great interest; clearly this was not something she’d expected to be asked about. "Uh… Yeah. It doesn't take long; I eat during and can heal my headache the morning after."

Sai nods. “Yes, Beautiful said you didn’t get nearly as plastered as she wanted you to.” The way he says it is with way too positive of an inflection, as if he’s talking about it being great weather outside instead of crude wording for getting drunk.

Sakura rolls her eyes, then. “She would think that.” She pauses, then looks at Sai carefully. "Ino should be back tonight, right?"

"Yes. I am excited. I'm feeling quite amorous."

Sasuke twitches and his frown sinks deeper, but Sakura rolls her eyes as if she is used to this lack of filter, and gently pushes his book into his face, firmly but carefully so as not to damage it.

"Too much information. Just say you miss her."

Sai smiles as he moves the book away. "It is less information than Beautiful gives."

"That's because she's not normal," Sakura replies, sighing. Sai nods almost mechanically, as if he is cataloging this tidbit on human social interaction away in a filing cabinet for future reference.

There is a pause that is just a bit too long, before Sai offers, “I am researching for an upcoming painting.” Sasuke doesn’t know Sai well enough to understand, but Sakura does; apparently this is his way of telling her that he is busy with his book.

"I won’t keep you, then. Don't let her forget about our plans, though, and tell her I missed our spar this week."

Sai smiles. "She was preparing a new playlist prior to her mission." This also interests Sasuke, but not as much as Ino trying to get her ‘plastered’. He is for some reason having great difficulty imagining Sakura even a little drunk.

Sakura sighs deeply through her nose this time, and says flatly, with no enthusiasm, "Great.” After a beat, she adds, “Well anyways, tell her I say hi. See you. Good luck with your painting.”

Sai nods, and Sakura then turns to go a different direction, Sasuke following close behind. They pass through four more interior rooms before they finally make it to the Medicine section towards the back of the building, where one book and two more medical journals are sectioned neatly away in an empty portion of shelf. The book is just as thick as the one she’d just returned.

“I didn’t know you liked to read, still,” Sakura mentions as she carefully picks up the stack. She’s smiling at him again; that must be what she wanted to say earlier. Maybe she’d expected Sai would be there, that they would pass through the room he was sitting in, and that’s why she’d held off.

Sasuke nods. “...I haven’t read much in a while.”

Jade eyes are soft on his. “Well, if you want to look for a bit, I could look, too.”

He nods again.

XXX

Roughly twenty minutes later, Sasuke leaves the library with Sakura, comparing what they’ve checked out underneath the streetlight just outside; the light has faded enough that it is a bit difficult to read without it.

They still had his information on file after all, though the woman, Ichika, had him fill out a renewal slip and updated his contact information to his new address before giving him a new card. It is a strangely comforting and nostalgic feeling, to know that he was still present in the archives of Konoha in ways he had been unaware of.

He had picked out two books: one about the history of kenjutsu in Fire Country, and another historical text documenting the overthrow of the daimyo in the Land of Silence. He has never been there, given it is beyond the reach of Shinobi authority; he figured it would be interesting to read about. With it being a samurai-led country, it made sense to read at the same time as the book on kenjutsu.

“These sound like you,” Sakura says after scanning the titles of what he’s picked, glancing up at him kindly as she rotates so he can read the information of her own. Cradled in her arms are the Journal of Cognitive Neuroscience, the other scholarly journal, Human Brain Mapping, the book from the Medicine section titled Translational Research in Traumatic Brain Injury, and what appears to be a fiction book, an addition to the others, titled Spoiled Suitopi.

“You read fiction, too,” he observes as he reads the title of the last one, and she takes this as her cue to shift them back together neatly into one stack, largest to smallest.

She laughs a little. “I try to. It’s a good mental reset after reading medical texts; everything starts to blur together after a while. This was actually a recommendation from Ino; she’s into the dramatic stuff, clearly. Sometimes they’re decent.”

Curiosity gets the better of him, and he decides to ask. “...A birthday extravaganza?”

She smiles timidly, expression shifting to something a little embarrassed. “I wouldn’t call it that; she showed up at my apartment last weekend with ingredients for drinks, and then we watched terrible movies in my living room.”

Sasuke is learning all kinds of things about Sakura this evening. “No Sai?”

She shakes her head. “No, that’s a me and Ino thing; he doesn’t really pick up on the nuance of them being terrible, and we figure we don’t want to give him poor examples to follow… he’s got enough of those already, dating her.” She grins a little, then. “Also, he can’t really handle his liquor.”

Sasuke thinks Sakura must be able to hold hers fairly well; she had seemed pretty confident earlier, regarding the morning after. He knows her mentor Tsunade has quite a reputation. He himself has never drank much.

“He’s... interesting.”

Sakura shrugs nonchalantly. "He's better than he used to be, regarding the oversharing. Ino is worse, honestly.”

He considers her words, then decides to drop the subject, because he doesn’t want to think about that. Sakura had said in her letters that Ino and Sai were together; he can only imagine what she knows about them, likely most of it against her will and learned in the manner he's just witnessed.

He shifts his attention upwards; a few stars are starting to peek their way into the night sky. He follows their path north, to the barest hints of lavender sinking below the horizon. It has become even more silent outside, fewer people and slightly cooler temperatures. There is still a breeze. They spent longer in the library than he'd anticipated.

He’s not sure what time she usually goes to sleep; if she works at eight, it’s probably early. He wonders if he should ask.

“Thank you for going with me. I’m sorry it took a little longer than I thought,” she says, before the question comes to him. He shifts his eyes back towards her; he’s about to tell her not to apologize because he clearly spent time browsing, too, but she’s already speaking again. “You said your apartment is on the north side, right?”

He inclines his head in an affirmative.

“We could walk that direction, if you want; there are a few newer things on that side of town I could point out that are kind of interesting. If…” She pauses, as if considering her wording. “If you haven’t seen them already, I mean.” She gestures to his selection from the library, gripped in his hand. “We could drop off your books, too. Not as much to carry back, then, with the box and the laundry rack.”

“...I’d like that.”

She smiles up at him again, tender effervescence. He realizes as they start making their way north that they both have been talking in more hushed voices, as if the blanket of nighttime shifting atop the village has quieted them in addition to their surroundings.

There is something soothing about treading around at nightfall with her. The village is well-lit enough that it’s fairly easy wandering, and lights emanating from windows cast everything softer, more inviting phosphorescence sifting onto the pathway beneath their feet. Earlier today, trekking back and forth between businesses and his apartment, it had felt more unfamiliar, like there was a disconnect and he was just passing through, despite the knowledge that he was transporting things to a permanent living space. It feels decidedly less transient next to Sakura, a hint of sweetness in tart recollections. He watches their shadows for a fleeting moment, cast close together to the right of them, near touching, and occasionally faded by windowpane glow.

There is a casino she points out a few blocks down where Tsunade apparently used to lose money fairly regularly. She explains it was her mentor’s favorite because it was somewhat close to the residence typically taken up by the Hokage; she used to call it lucky, even though she never won. Sasuke finds out through this story that the Hokage residence is still sitting empty; Kakashi has apparently still not moved there, preferring instead to stay where he has been residing for years. Sakura mentions in a softer tone that she thinks it’s because of his apartment’s proximity to the graveyard where his old teammate, the Nohara girl, is buried.

There is a long stretch of silence in which Sasuke considers just how Kakashi has always seemed able to see straight through him. He’s fairly certain the girl had been a medic, too.

“...Naruto’s house isn’t far from the Hokage’s office, either,” Sasuke observes finally, changing the subject. He’s with her right now; he doesn’t want to ruminate too long. He thinks that's improvement.

Jade eyes sparkle up at him. “No, it’s not. I’m pretty sure that was on purpose; I don’t think they intend to move again. I’m sure he’ll give you the tour eventually - he’s pretty proud of their place; Hinata keeps it pretty nice - but it has some extra rooms.”

He tries not to think about the implications of that for too long. Naruto being in charge of a tiny human is not a very reassuring thought, even with his apparent strides in social awareness.

They pass a yakitori place she mentions is good, a few more blocks down. It seems pretty calm for such a restaurant, not as busy as Ichiraku’s usually is, though it’s later now and they’re likely getting ready to close. “I’ve been there with Naruto and Hinata a few times,” she tells him. “At least, when we can convince him to go eat something other than ramen.”

Sasuke hadn’t realized Sakura was that close with Naruto’s wife, though it makes sense instantaneously; she has known her for years. He thinks for a second before questioning, “Is she still as quiet?”

Sakura purses her lips in thought. “She talks more, now, for sure, but she’s still pretty shy around people she doesn’t know well.” She smiles, then. “I think Naruto has been really good for her, actually. Her for him, too; they balance each other out well.”

He supposes that’s true; perhaps Hinata is the reason for Naruto’s continued emotional growth. He ponders momentarily whether he and Sakura will balance each other out well.

She’s looking at him as if he should say something, so he does. “...He had vegetables in his ramen today.”

Sakura laughs. “Yes, she does force vegetables into his food every once in a while, now, so he's more used to them. I think she might have slipped Teuchi some money to start throwing them in his orders, to be honest."

Sasuke snorts, because of course that would be how that came about.

"It’s for the best," Sakura continues, lips quirking upwards still. He tears his eyes away from her mouth after a second. "He was eating pretty much all noodles and junk for so long. Hopefully it’ll start to cancel out with a few more years.”

As they walk farther, he starts to recognize things from earlier today; a bed of alabaster azaleas surrounding a residential building painted green, and a rather large street sign on a corner, right next to an ornate bench. They are getting fairly close to his apartment building. He holds off on saying something for a little longer, though, because he wants to spend more time with her. He hopes that's not too selfish; he has missed her. A lot.

“There’s an interesting place over there,” Sakura notes, pointing out a clearly aged building that he thinks he walked by on his return trip from the market earlier in the afternoon. “They’re only open two or three days a week, but it’s antiques now. I don’t usually buy anything other than books, but it’s fun to look through; they get rare ones in, from time to time. The owner is really nice.”

He nods. That would be a good way to spend an afternoon. He suspects she must have a collection of books at her apartment, then. He wonders how many.

She is mute for a moment, as if in thought, as they pass through another intersection. He wonders if he should be adding more to the conversation, but it doesn’t feel like an awkward silence; just an easy one.

He spies another familiar sign, this one advertising the market hours. “...My building is a few blocks this way,” he mentions quietly, loath as he is for this evening spent with her to come to an end. She looks up at him for a moment, then nods, and he subtly starts leading her in the general direction of his apartment complex.

His building comes into view a short time later. He points it out right before they pass beneath the cherry blossom tree, and Sakura nods in recognition. “Sai used to live somewhere over in this area, before he moved in with Ino. I’m not sure where, exactly. I know he liked how quiet it was, though.”

Sasuke nods as he pulls his key from his pocket, and they cross the street. He had been right about the light pollution; there is little enough of it that one can see the stars rather clearly, more so than one could from the library.

He wonders if he should perhaps invite her in. He thinks of the letters, still sitting on the small end table in the living room.

She saves him from making the decision. “I’ll wait here,” she tells him politely, leaning up against the old brick. He nods.

He goes up the stairway, down to the last door on the right. Once he unlocks his door, he places the two books on the kitchen table inside, and locks the door again behind him. It only takes him a minute before he is coming down the stairs again.

She smiles at him, then blinks when he holds out his hand. She colors, he thinks, when she realizes he’s offering to carry her books for her again; it’s harder to tell with the lack of light.

As she hands them to him carefully, she says, voice soft, “My place is a little south of the library; not by too much.” Her eyes flit to his, then dart away; there is a careful smile on her lips. “Maybe a little over ten minutes from here.”

They wander together in an easy silence, her leading the way more now. There are a few crickets chirping. It was fairly warm out today, so it makes sense that insects are starting to make their return. A gentle breeze continues to waft through from time to time.

He walks close enough to her that he can faintly smell raspberries, each time the wind blows just right. There are even fewer people out and about now, it being closer to nine in the evening; the road is fairly deserted. They go by the library again, lights turned off, and more closed businesses. It soon transitions into older construction that he assumes must be residential.

She was right; it doesn’t take long, around twelve minutes at a leisurely pace, before she points out a building further down the street. “That’s the one.”

As they get closer, he notes that hers is also an older building, built out of cream brick; there is something nice about that realization, that she also apparently chose something older with a bit of history over something brand new. There are few enough street lights that one can see the stars overhead well at night here, too.

“There’s a patio or balcony attached to each unit,” Sakura remarks once they’re closer, pointing at one on the northernmost part of the second story that is brimming with potted plants, much more than any of her neighbors’. “That one’s mine.”

As they round the corner of the building, he assumes to reach the front entrance, she tells him it was one of the reasons she selected this apartment, aside from its proximity to the hospital and her family's residence. "My parents' house has balconies for both bedrooms. It was strange to imagine not having one. This one’s attached to the bedroom, too; it’s nice to sit out there, if the weather’s not too extreme."

It’s a smaller complex, only two stories high. He thinks there must be six units, given its size and the trio of balconies they passed beneath, three small patios in their shadows on the ground level. It is somewhat close to the hospital, as she’d said, but far enough away that it's not necessarily an area that would bustle with activity, even during the day’s busiest hours; it is very still right now, peaceful. They pass through a glass door that is not locked, leading into a common area with six doors, three on the main level, and then three on the second level, with a metal stairway leading upwards. A huge, two-story high bay window sprawls by the main door, overlaid in a diamond pattern, which must allow light to stream in the majority of the day.

Each of the doors to individual units has at least one or two plants framing it, but he knows which one is hers right away. An array of thriving potted plants surround the upper northernmost side door, spilling out to surround the entire right side of the banister that frames the edges of the building. Hers is also the unit furthest on the upper right, like his; another nice realization. A few of her plants are flowering, but for the most part they are varying shades of green, with accents of paler colors. Desaturated and calming, just as he’d guessed she would like, rather than intensities of marigold and cobalt and fuchsia. It's hard to tell in the dim lighting, but as they get closer, he thinks that the few blooms are pistachio and lavender and blush in color, like her hair.

Or her cheeks. Jade eyes are on him again as he finishes walking up the stairway behind her.

He follows her to her door and leans a little against the railing behind him while she grabs her keys from her bag; he doesn’t think she’d mind if he came in for a few minutes, but she didn’t explicitly invite him, and he wants to be polite.

Once she’s unlocked it, she turns back to him to take her books. Her hand brushes his, and it’s incredibly distracting, again. “I’ll be right back.” She smiles at him before disappearing inside her apartment.

She leaves the door slightly ajar behind her, and he tries not to look. He busies himself with observing what appears by her neighbors’ doorways instead. No light emanates from beneath the doors of any of them; he wonders, this being older construction, if more of the tenants here are older, and are perhaps in bed already. The upper units probably aren’t occupied by extremely elderly people, given the stairs, but the ground level units’ decorations appear more classic and refined, less youthful. He notes the pots surrounding the other doors are very matchy, but Sakura’s are less so; hers are various shades of neutral terracotta colors, soft and inviting, some with unique shapes.

She’s back quickly, foldable drying rack and shoebox in tow, closing her door mostly behind her. She also must have set her tote bag aside; it's no longer situated on her shoulder.

He realizes all at once as she meets his eyes, handing him the items she’s gifting him, that he does not want this evening to end.

“Thank you,” he says, voice husky.

“You’re welcome,” she murmurs, just as hushed.

Sasuke studies her eyes for a long moment, trying to commit the life in them to memory, though he already has, he thinks.

“...May I see you tomorrow after you work?” He finally asks quietly, trying to keep the hope out of his tone. He knows he’ll see her for his medical clearance in the morning, but he would still like to spend time with her outside of that, if she doesn't have plans already.

She looks crestfallen, smile slipping a little before coming back. “I would love to see you, but I have dinner with my parents every other Thursday, since I get off at four. They stopped by for a visit on my actual birthday, but they wanted to do cake and a gift tomorrow night after our usual supper time.” She pauses, searches his expression for a moment. “Maybe the day after tomorrow, if you’re not busy? I get off around four on Fridays, too.”

He nods, committing this part of her schedule to memory. “...I’ll meet you at the hospital, then.”

Her smile gets wider. “Okay. I can show you around the other newer parts of the village, if you’d like. The southwest side has really expanded.”

He nods his head in agreement, thinking. He would like to ask for more time with her, before he starts taking mission assignments again, but he also doesn’t want to monopolize all of it; she has years worth of life here, roots other than him that need tending. He hopes she’s saying yes because she actually wants to, and not simply for his sake.

He takes a deep breath, forcing down nervous vulnerability at his next question. “...And Saturday?”

She blinks, then blushes darker, smile growing wider still. She casts her glance downwards to her feet out of shyness, shifting a bit. “Saturdays I work seven to three; I’m going to stop by the market after for some gardening supplies with Ino, but other than that, I didn’t have anything set in stone.” But then jade eyes flick back up at him, and they are slightly apologetic.

His heart sinks for a second, rejection stinging a little behind his eyes. She doesn’t want to see me that often. He’s been absent for too long. She's probably tired of him already, though she hasn’t said anything. He has enjoyed tonight, but he's aware he doesn't make the best company.

“Naruto sent a clone by this afternoon that was going on about an original Team Seven reunion dinner, though. He mentioned Saturday night as a possibility,” she reveals, and his world comes back into focus, heart reversing upwards back into his chest cavity.

Sasuke huffs amusedly, then, relieved. “...Of course he did.”

She sighs wistfully, shaking her head. “Ichiraku’s, I’m sure. I’m pretty sure I’ve tried everything on the menu in triplicate, at this point.”

He eyes her carefully, trying to dry swallow his fear of rejection like a pill. Corrosion, he thinks. “...After dinner?”

Shimmering seafoam again. Happy, transparently pleased, and he’s glad he asked, shoved away the nerves; he’d do it again in a heartbeat, if it’s going to make her eyes look like that. “Of course. We could… hang out here, if you want. Or was there something you had in mind?”

His gaze softens. “Here is fine,” he answers. It is more than fine, actually. He’d go anywhere, if it meant he could soak in her presence longer, but he’s more than a little curious about what her apartment looks like on the inside. His own is pretty sterile, even now mostly put together after the afternoon, devoid of most anything other than necessities. He has an inkling that Sakura is the type to truly make wherever she's living feel like a home, though, given the pleasant spread of life he’s seen spilling out here on her doorstep.

“Okay,” she confirms, dimple reappearing. “I’ll look forward to it.”

There is something in her eyes after a second, gears turning, a question she must want to ask him.

"Would you…" She's talking even more softly, now, hushed as if she's going to scare him away. Her eyes meet his apprehensively as she shifts her weight from one side to the other. "Would you want to maybe... have tea tomorrow morning? I'm… not sure if you have plans or not, but I have a little time, before I work. There's a good place near the hospital, and then after we could get your exam done at eight like we planned."

The vines between his ribs twist pleasurably. She does want to see him, after all. She's not too busy. She's looking at him nervously, as if he would say no, as if he hasn’t spent the last twenty-four hours longing for her company again.

"...I'll look forward to it," he answers quietly, because he will; he likes tea, occasionally. He thinks he will like it better with her.

Her entire countenance brightens somehow, even as she flushes darker. "Oh. Good." She sounds relieved.

"...I can meet you here," he finds himself saying, and her eyes are sparkling at him, now, at what's implied - longer with her, another walk together. "What time?"

She purses her lips now, apparently still nervous. "Would… seven be too early?" Her voice trails off a little, as if in hesitance, as she finishes the question.

He chooses his next words carefully, meaningfully, so there is no uncertainty. "Not at all."

She regards him then like he has done something wholly wonderful, cheeks a rich red in dim light and expression heart-wrenchingly elated.

There is an expectant pause as the oblivion happens again, dimmer now but just as powerful. He really wants to kiss her; he’s been thinking about it the entire evening. He wonders if she has, too, and if maybe she wants him to. There’s no one around, in this little entry area of her small complex, in front of her door and her plants in faded hues.

He decides to go with his gut.

It’s somehow even better, this time, anticipation and lips meeting and a barely audible exhale of breath through the nose on her part, almost like she’s suddenly at ease; he thinks, pleased, that she must have wanted him to. Her hands gently meet his chest, tentatively pressing against him. He would like to do something with his, but it's still occupied, holding what she's supplied him with. He settles for pressing his lips to hers with a little more confidence than yesterday. It’s tender and over much too quickly, much like the evening they have spent together; all soft light settling, lambent and beguiling.

She is crimson when they part for a breath, before shyly directing her gaze away and shifting back down; he realizes that she must have been standing on the tips of her toes to reach him.

Her hands linger on his chest, and then her gaze comes back up to his, almost determinedly.

“I’m… really happy you’re back.” Her face is still flushed, but she doesn’t look away. Her pupils are dilated, bottomless black dwarfing green.

Heat creeps up his neck. His pulse pounds just below her fingertips, as if she’s tugging at his heartstrings with them.

“...I am, too,” he whispers, before he leans down again.

He thinks that he could stay here forever, clutching all that she’s given him, enveloped in a sweet ambrosia of tart berry and newly unfurling plants and soft lips that he’s thought of all day, now against his again.

She gently drops her hands from his chest when they finally part. She’s smiling; she is so pretty.

“Good night, Sasuke-kun.” Her voice is near a whisper. “I’ll see you in the morning.”

“...Good night, Sakura,” he murmurs in response.

XXX

The journey from her place to his really is quite quick; he doesn’t see anyone on his way back. Stars are visible almost the entire way, Leo and Ursa Major and Cassiopeia. The moon is a thin sliver amongst them, raised high in the sky.

Once he's inside, he carefully folds out the drying rack she’s given him in the small laundry closet and lays out damp clothes to allow the air to finish the job. He's glad he didn't need to make another trip to the store. A trip with her was better, and she somehow had just what he needed. He thinks perhaps she always has, and his vision has simply been too blurry, obscured by smudged glass, to see it.

Sasuke retrieves the stack of her letters and places them in the box gingerly so as not to further bend them. He stares at the picture for a long time before also stowing it away, sliding the container onto the shelf in the closet for safekeeping.

He doesn’t feel tired yet, and it's not too cold, so he goes to visit the memorial stone, after, as he’d planned. He feels it is the right thing to do, after having been gone so long.

He confronts many things as he sits there, the bevy of crickets and soft swishing of grass the only sounds on this quiet spring evening, a long list of engravings barely legible in the shadows.

Melancholy is one of them, seeping in slowly, as he’d known it would. Grief and acrimony and betrayal, too. A little bit of anger, still. He also experiences sillage, the aroma of his mother’s flower garden and the scent of his aunt and uncle’s baked goods and the smell of an empty house, all blending together in his olfactory senses like it was yesterday, a bitter incense of nostalgia that is hard on the inhale.

This time, though, semisweet berry and antiseptic are also among them, memory fresh in his nostrils, and he experiences a little bit of comfort, too.

Sasuke doesn’t sleep well, after, but when the nightmare comes, gruesome, and he’s awake for the remainder of the night, he has some books to help steady him until seven comes.

[silverfootstepswrites]

Eden: BLEACH [2]

ZERO / BLEACH (here) / TWIST / REVERSE / DYE / RED

++++

One lives in the hope of becoming a memory. - Antonio Porchia

++++

There was a knock on the open door. Sakura scowled before she even looked up.

“Go away.”

“You sound more and more like him with every day.”

Sakura finally lifted her head from the ancient manuscript. She lowered her magnifying glass. 

“Headmaster,” she greeted Hashirama. The older man, who hadn’t aged a single day since she had first met him, smiled in return. He lingered in the doorway, well aware of the fact that she hadn’t actually invited him inside. She just blinked at him. 

Hashirama sighed. 

“You’re really just like him. I wanted to let you know that those spell books you requested last month are finally here,” he informed her. And then his eyes drifting to the pile sitting on her desk. “Oh… you already got them?”

Sakura paused. The truth was that she recalled in her long nightmare several days ago that these books would arrive. Just to be sure, she had popped into the library to check. And there they were. Labelled with her name and her department. 

It was unsettling- if that was the right word for a situation like this.

Coincidences happened all the time. But was it a coincidence if so many of them piled up at once like this?

“How goes the research?” Hashirama then asked. 

In response, Sakura extended her hand. She imagined the molecules in the air gathering into a solid surface. The shield expanded, shoving Hashirama all the way out the door. Hashirama examined the shimmering surface of the shield. When he poked it, static electricity crackled off the outside. He jerked his hand back. 

“That’s a nice touch,” he commended. And then he waved his hand. “Alright. I get the hint. I’ll get out of your hair.”

“Thank you,” Sakura replied, already turning back to her reading. 

Madara cackled when Sakura recounted the encounter to him that night.

“Good. Keep that geezer far away from you,” Madara agreed, crunching a pistachio between his back molars. 

Sakura thought for a moment. She turned away from the stove for a moment. It was her turn to cook dinner. “You’re no spring chicken yourself, Papa,” she reminded him. Madara frowned at her. 

Sakura paused. She lowered her spatula. 

“Sorry, was that too much?” she asked. 

But Madara only smirked, leaning against the counter. He ruffled her hair. 

“Don’t worry about that kind of crap, kid. We’re always fine,” he assured her. And then he pointed at the pan. Sakura went back to stirring the garlic before it could burn. 

“Quit snacking on those. You’ll ruin your appetite,” Sakura told him. She heard him chuckle.

“Are you my grandmother? Quit nagging.” And then he crunched through another pistachio, grinding it to pieces between his teeth. 

Later that night, Sakura laid on her bed, phone pressed to her ear. 

“Are you sure you won’t come? The guys are cute. I promise,” Ino pleaded one last time. And then she added: “Sorry. It’s just… I haven’t seen you in forever. I miss you.”

And Sakura smiled at the ceiling. 

“Yeah. I’ll sit this one out, Ino. I’m not feeling it,” Sakura answered. She heard Ino sigh. 

Before Ino could worry too much, Sakura then said: “I do appreciate the invites, Ino. I know you’re just thinking about me. I’ll be at the next one.”

Ino’s tone brightened. “Okay. I’ll talk to you tomorrow then.”

“Take pictures so I can see them later.”

“Yeah yeah. I’ll drop by the shop?” 

“Yeah.”

“Love you.”

“Love you too.”

Letting out a sigh, Sakura dropped the phone and rolled onto her side. She stretched her arms over her head. As she lay there, she could hear footsteps downstairs. She thought for a moment. And then her mouth opened. 

“Papa,” she called.

No response. 

She considered getting up, and then she extended her left arm. Pointing, she flicked her wrist as she called him again. 

This time, the “Papa” traveled down the stairs, spreading through the third floor like mist. She could feel the way the word surged ahead, knocking walls and doors, spreading until she was sure that it could be heard everywhere.

There was a pause. And then she felt Madara’s magic wash over her in a wave. Soft. Just a little warm- as were the spells of most fire affinity casters.

What.

I’m bored.

There was a drawn-out exhale. Madara trudged up the stairs, his glasses dangling from the chain around his neck. He stood in the doorway, hand on his hip. 

“What do you want me to do about that?” he demanded. 

Sakura tilted her head to look at him. 

“Dunno. I wanna eat something.”

Madara squinted at her. “We had dinner.”

Sakura stared right back at him. 

He pushed off the doorway, already walking out of the room. 

“You want toast?”

“With butter and jam,” she called after him. Hugging a pillow to her chest, she fell back on the bed again.

“Brat,” he grumbled, stomping down the stairs. 

Sakura laughed. 

They stood at the counter eating together, barefoot, scolding each other for getting crumbs everywhere. 

Sakura loved the way the butter melted in her mouth, mixing with the sweet taste of strawberries. Madara even cut the toast into triangles, just the way she liked, even though she had never once asked him to. 

It struck her, staring out the kitchen window, how fortunate she was. The people who had abandoned her had never written or called. She was sure that the Senju Institute and Madara knew of some way to get in touch with them. But she didn’t want to know. 

Madara had taught her when everyone else said there was something defective about her. He had given her a place to belong. And as all these thoughts swam around in her head, Sakura let her head fall against Madara’s arm. 

“You know…” 

Madara looked at her as he took a bite of his toast. 

“I really like being here with you, Papa. I feel happy here,” she told him. 

Madara stopped chewing. He looked away. 

“Then stick around, kid. It’s not bad having you around too,” Madara replied, not meeting her eyes. 

Sakura beamed. She didn’t have to say anything else. They finished eating their late-night snack together. Brushing crumbs off their face and licking jam from their fingers once they were done. 

++++

On the days that she wasn’t working at the dream shop, Sakura was working on her own research. Her thesis was exploring how magical barriers and fields interact with dreams. If shields and charms were cast in the real world, would those protections extend to dreams? (No.) Could they be manipulated to work in dreams? (Maybe- she wasn’t sure yet.)

Her undergraduate studies in abjuration focused mostly on shields and banishment. Shisui had laughed when she announced her major to them one morning at the shop. As Itachi and Sasuke both punched his arms, he tried to explain that it was a good thing. 

Of course you would want to protect people. That’s just like you.

Everyone in the Uchiha family agreed that Sakura’s shields had a kick to them. They didn’t just block. They fought back when attacked. One of her favorite shields was one that she liked to call The Urchin. It looked like any other shield- clear but shimmering faintly under the right light. If touched gently, it had no reaction. But if struck with force, thousands of spikes rose out of the surface to stab the threat. 

For Sasuke, who favored evocation magic, Sakura’s shields were a great source of amusement as he tried to find ways to break them down with fireballs and bolts of lightning. And Sakura in turn would then work to fix those weaknesses to render his attacks harmless. Neither of them ever admitted it out loud, but their playful competition was what had probably driven both of them to excel in their studies during their undergrad years. 

Itachi worked almost exclusively with illusions. His ability to blur illusions with reality made him a fearsome sparring partner. It was no surprise that he had graduated at the top of his class in record time. Even now, his old professors joked that Itachi had walked into the school and then walked out with his diplomas. 

Shisui was the only one among them that hadn’t gone on to college. But that didn’t seem to bother anyone- especially not his parents. Because as soon as it was legal, Shisui was scouted to work with the city’s observatory to test how celestial bodies and their positions influenced casting. It was a new field that not many people were familiar with. Shisui had a tendency to pack his car with his telescope and spectrometer and drive off into the mountains whenever the skies were clear. If his frequent absences irritated Madara, he didn’t say anything. 

With so many people around her who excelled at magic, it wasn’t hard to find someone to assist her with research on most days. Even her friends from school, Ino and Naruto, were usually around to lend a helping hand. 

But Sakura liked it best when Madara was the one to help her with her experiments.  

“Because I ask the least amount of stupid questions,” he guessed when she told him so. 

They sat cross-legged in Sakura’s room in the dream world. Madara looked around at all the crystals that filled the tall shelves. She had recently extended the height of her room just to accommodate them all. 

“No. You just… you’re good at knowing how to help. You’re kind of a natural, Papa,” Sakura replied. 

Before Madara could touch any of the dreams, Sakura made a sweeping gesture with both her hands. The room around them dissolved into a gentle blue mist. And when it reformed, they were standing in what looked like the city park. There was even a swing creaking gently in the breeze nearby. 

Madara was sitting on a boulder now. He patted the surface a few times, nodding approvingly. 

“The texture’s pretty realistic. You’ve got a good eye for detail,” he commented.

Sakura took a moment to smile before she closed her eyes and gathered energy into her palms again. This time, when she swept her arms, the particles in the air began to vibrate, knitting together. Closer and closer, closing the gaps until they formed a standard shield. 

Madara picked up a small stone and tossed it at the shield. It bounced off. 

“Well. Looks like it’s holding this time around.”

As he spoke, the smooth surface of the shield began to ripple. Like a soap bubble, it popped. Sakura’s arms fell to her sides. Her lips jutted out. 

“Oh man, I thought I really had it this time,” she lamented. 

But Madara just patted the empty spot beside him. Sakura made her way over. She climbed up on the boulder and plopped down beside him. 

“I wonder why shields don’t work in dreams. It would be helpful for lots of people,” she grumbled. She pulled her knees up to her chest. 

“Why’d you choose something so hard? No one’s ever managed to make abjuration magic last here. The dream world doesn’t follow the regular laws of nature,” Madara pointed out. And as if to drive the point home, he held up his pointer finger. A flame appeared at the tip. Only it was burning upside down. 

Sakura copied him. She lowered the temperature of the magic until it turned a dull, almost brownish color. When she lowered her hand, the flame dissipated completely.

“There’s lots of people. Kids especially. Who feel scared. And maybe they didn’t have some weird artificer popping into their heads every night to make the nightmares go away,” she explained. When she met Madara’s eyes, he was smiling again. Sighing, he patted her head a couple times. 

“You got a real heart of gold. You know that, right?” he commended. But the praise almost sounded a little sad. 

Madara’s hand fell away. 

“By the way, I wanted to ask.”

“Yeah, Papa?”

“You’ve been at home a lot lately. Something happen with your friends?”

It wasn’t like Madara to pry into her private matters. He hadn’t asked why she had started casting a barrier over their home every night before they went to bed. And he didn’t ask why she had suddenly started texting him every day while she was at work. 

It was just a nightmare. One of countless ones she had dreamt over all these years. It still made her feel sick to remember the scene. So much blood. 

She did feel guilty for not speaking to Gaara again. He hadn’t done anything wrong. But the image of him laying dead there next to Madara had felt too strange. Part of the reason she had chosen to minor in divination was because dreams and divination were often linked together. Dreams could be a warning of some events to come. And if Gaara was part of that ominous message, she didn’t want to involve herself with him in any way. 

“Just been busy. Too tired to go out, mostly. Everything’s fine with my friends. Ino’s gonna drop by the shop tomorrow. I might get lunch with her,” Sakura replied, looking down at her hands. 

They both looked up as they heard distant beeping. 

“That’s your alarm,” Sakura told him, turning to Madara again. 

He hadn’t aged a day since he had picked her up from the Senju Academy all those years ago. She knew that really talented casters who were constantly working with magic often lived much longer. Bathing in all that energy had a rejuvenating effect. She suspected that her aging would begin to slow soon too. It was rumored that Professor Tobirama and Professor Hashirama were centuries old- although no one would know from looking at their faces. 

Madara nodded. 

“See you soon, kid.”

He tapped her shoulder once before he dissolved into black mist. 

When Sakura opened her eyes, she could hear the faucet running in the bathroom. Her phone was buzzing on her nightstand. She reached over to hit the snooze button. The faucet shut off. 

“Papa,” she croaked half into her pillow. 

There was a pause. When she pried one eye open, Madara was opening her bedroom door. There was a towel around his neck.

“Pancakes,” was all she mumbled. 

Madara rolled his eyes. 

“Yeah, yeah, Your Highness,” he complained, closing the door again. 

++++

The peaceful days continued even as the weather grew cold. Snow fell on the city, but the inside of the dream shop stayed cozy thanks to an enchantment cast by Madara at the beginning of every winter. 

Sakura didn’t really have to duck her head when she entered the store. But her cousins did. It was one of the few times when she was glad to be so much shorter. 

She unwrapped her scarf and tossed it into the air. It hovered there. Waiting until she unzipped her coat and threw it too. Only then did the magic whisk them both away to hang on the coat rack.

“Morning,” Sasuke said from behind the counter.

“Hi. I’m freezing,” she replied. Nose red from the cold, Sakura rubbed her hands together. 

“There’s still some coffee in the break room. Help yourself,” Sasuke told her. And when he began taking off his hoodie for her, Sakura waved his offer away. 

When she approached, Sasuke turned the appointment book around so she could see the day’s schedule. Itachi was upstairs dealing with a client already. She didn’t have anything booked until after lunch today. 

“Shisui?” she called. 

“In storage,” came a muffled reply. 

She found him digging through one of the shelves. To the side were rolled pieces of paper. She picked one up and opened it to find a star map. 

“What’s this?”

Shisui’s head popped up. 

“Ah. Weather looks real clear tomorrow. I’m gonna head out and get some readings.”

Sakura felt her knees buckle. She gripped the edge of the shelf as she remembered something else from that nightmare that had never faded from her mind. 

“Shi.”

“Yeah?”

When she didn’t speak, Shisui straightened. Dusting off his shirt, he stepped toward her. When he saw the look on her face, he rushed the last few steps. He grasped her shoulders.

“Hey hey hey. What’s wrong?” 

Sakura grabbed his forearms. 

“Do you have to go?” 

“What?”

“On your trip. Do you have to go?”

“Yeah, kid. Been planning this for a while. What’s wrong?” he said, slowly. He searched her face as he spoke. She hated the way his forehead wrinkled with concern. Hated even more the way Sasuke opened the door. Standing there with his fists held in front of him, as if getting ready to punch whatever had upset her. 

“What’d you say, you turd?” Sasuke snapped. He shoved Shisui aside. He ducked to get a better look at Sakura’s expression. 

“You don’t look so good. Let’s go sit down,” Sasuke suggested. He took her hand. Waited for her to slowly curl her fingers around his. As he guided her to the door, Itachi appeared. His face brightened as he spotted her.

“Hey. When’d you get here?” he greeted her.

The warmth in his voice made her burst into tears. 

“What’d you two say to her?” Itachi immediately accused. He crossed the threshold to wrap his arms around her, holding her close to his chest. He patted her back as he went on with his scolding the others. “She’s tired enough as is without you two saying something stupid to her.”

“I didn’t do anything, I swear.”

“I just said I was going on a trip.”

Sakura bawled into Itachi’s shirt. She didn’t have the energy to care how stupid she must look. She needed to tell Shisui not to go. Not go away. Because what if that awful dream came true and he disappeared forever again? And then Itachi would go too. And to imagine the sorrow in Sasuke’s face hurt more than all those other things put together. 

“Sasuke, go get her something to drink. Shisui, go get a blanket out of the back,” Itachi was ordering now. And then he lowered his voice. 

“There there. Cry it out. You’ll feel better once you do,” Itachi murmured, patting her back again. 

[imz1-z1]

MADMEN

First group under MM Entertainment

They are reason MM entertainment changed to music label from the dance studio

Debuted in 2017 with song called Bir Qadam, debut MV was for Beri Jaqynda

Their fandom name is MADwave 

Besides their group activities all members do other jobs such as being dance teachers, because they pay for their MV’s themselves!

Watch their documentary with English subs here

Aron

Roman Park  Born in 16.09.1997, Almaty Half Korean Family: mother, sister (his sister have twins)

He is Mad Men’s leader, rapper and dancer. He makes some of their choreos too

Aron is a huge Blackpink fan and his bias is Jennie. He also like BTS, Bigbang

Have 12 tattoos, some of them are same with Khvan Ruslan

Aron said he won’t take anymore tattoos

Eclipse tattoo on his clavicle is unfinished one

His first tattoo was “Be yourself” which he got when he was 17 and it’s most meaningful to him

His favorite tattoo is girl in the arm

Aron had piercing on his lips

Can play piano and dombra, went to dombra classes because of girl

Have trypophobia and claustrophobia

Aron have a cat which name is Ikki and dogs (Richard and Hika)

He wants to have two kids

Likes manga

Aron is interested anything that develops you spiritually and physically

Likes sleeping, sleeping and sleeping

People call him sleepyhead

Loves pizza

Coffee lover

“For eating there is a separate place in my heart.”

Ideal girl (2017): No one knows what kind of person we’re going to love, maybe they're gonna be the complete opposite of the ideal. That’s why I don’t have an ideal type. But there are qualities that I like. Those who have excellent taste in clothes, can cook well, with restraint and kindness.

In 2018 answered to same question again saying: I look at the soul not the looks

Joined to Madmen because of Tim

His closest friends are Tim, Khay and Khvan Ruslan

Aron’s favorite color was long time purple but then he changed it because too many liked that color

“I’m not an expert at love, so I’ll say one thing, happiness is worth fighting for.”

Aron never have regretted anything in his past because for him it makes him the one who he is today and that’s why he doesn’t even want to fix anything from this past

“You shouldn’t regret something that has happened.”

Have said that what inspires him is past, this moment and future

“I want to stay true to myself, stay the way I was born, the way my mother raised me.”

He likes that things are in order

People think Aron is very responsible leader and he takes care of people really well

Bad habit: licks his lips too often

He isn’t punctual

If he would have superpower he would like to heal people

For him ideal day would be spend whole 24 hour in one day with his mom (2019)

He doesn’t really watch movies, but during quarantine he did watch some

After graduating from school he didn’t continue to uni

Secret talent: he learns choreos very easily

He did describe himself in three words: stubborn, not punctual and hot-tempered (2019)

Aron doesn’t like people who smiles at you but talks bad behind your back

When he was 16 he did run away from police (NTK interview 2020)

Have drank so much that he couldn’t remember a thing in next day (NTK interview 2020)

Never kissed a girl in first date (NTK interview 2020)

“I always think of my loved ones.”

“I want to tell you so that you always remain the same regarding the circumstances. Never listen people who surround you and go to your goal. Do what you like. Wear the clothes you like. Just stay independent.

Khay

Tin Khai Lun aka Khay Born in 11.08.1999, Almaty Korean

His position in group is lead vocalist and lead dancer

Scared easily

Khay had opportunity to live in South Korea but decided to debut with Madmen

His fave food is Tteokbokki and lagman

Loves spicy food

Studied in School of Fine Arts: art and technical design

Speaks Russian, English, some Kazakh

Started dancing in 2010

In 2012 started to listen Kpop because went to Korean Festival

His favorite singer is GD

Hobbies: drawing, playing basketball, dancing

Can play guitar and piano

Ideal girl (2017): Cheerful and well mannered. With smiling eyes. Girl should have a good appetite and a great sense of humor. Understanding and sharing my interests. I like the looks of the singers: IU and Jisoo.

Khay has been wearing glasses since 1st grade

He likes to solve Rubik’s cubes, his record is 49 seconds

People say it’s easy to get along with him

Mark

Alikhan Asen aka Mark Born 24.07.1999, Shymkent Kazakh

Group’s vocalist

Before Madmen he was in Sevenlight, after Sevenlight disbanded he did solo stuff

He is still close with some 7light members (Sai, Kael)

Have said that Kael is his best friend

Is closest one with Aron in Madmen

When he was in 7light he did cook for the members

Likes to play guitar, but can play dombra as well

Religious person

"Being good human as much as I can, don’t jump in front of anyone, not thinking misdeed about human beings, not making bad things."

Qualities which he likes in people: I like those who don’t be stilted and be real, honest, positive. People who are LOYAL to their own work, to the ones they walk with.

Qualities which he doesn't like in people: Telling many lies, being stilted, thinking of only themselves getting something illegally, jealousy, vaunt

He is scared of snakes and spiders

Ideal type (2021): I’m thinking, there are characters as many as the amount of people living. Every person is not the same, so I cannot say “yeah that’s my type”. I think the person you really love becomes the ideal for you even though they have minuses. There is no standard “ideal”, every person changes it according to their choices. Am I right?

Mark prefers to write Kazakh in Latin alphabets

Said that his bad habit is that he is so sensitive

Since 4th grade he have been doing music

Did learn to play guitar by himself because his mother wanted him to play dombra

Mark moved to Almaty to study

Moora

Alimurad Ibraimov  Born in 06.12.2000, Tashkent, Uzbekistan Kazakh Family: mother, three older sisters (Kamila, Akzhanat)

In Madmen his position is vocalist

He can play piano

Haven’t dated yet anyone

Moora’s first book which he did read was “The Little Prince”

He have played basketball 

Loves anime especially Naruto

Moora got his first tattoo in 2020

Shy but when he is comfortable with people he is loud

His favorite cartoon is Lion King

People say he is smart

Said that his bad habit is laziness

Perfect day: To be home with his relatives

Likes to play video games for example Tekken and Mortal Kombat

Before joining to Madmen he was in dance group called LevelUp

Have said that his closest friends are Aron and Rem, he even got necklace from them which he cherish a lot

Prefers black when wearing clothes

"This is my life, this is my world." - about his family

His favorite food if meat but he likes everything which have tomatoes in it

When he was asked to describe himself in 3 words he said: Lazy, gets angry easily but calm fast as well

"My mood gets up every time because of my mom"

Speaks Kazakh, Russian and English, prefers using Russian

Aron was Moora's first choreographer in MM

M

Born in 8.12.1999, Kyzylorda, Qarmaqshy region Real name: Ahmetqali Madiyar Mazityli Height: 178 cm

People call him Madi, he didn't want to have this as his stage name so people wouldn't confuse him to Madi Rymbaev

He likes to listen Bruno Mars, Maroon 5

Before he became MM trainee he was in Qpop group called RedBlaidd, they did one song and disbanded due different views

Madi’s cousins are Ace from Ninety One and Ash from NKI

He is choreographer under MM entertainment

Speaks Russian and Kazakh

In group he is vocalist

His favorite food is burgers

Likes to eat a lot

Before he joined to Madmen he was in Madness

One of his closest friend is Madness's Sula

He is extrovert

Likes watching anime, especially Naruto

FORMER MEMBERS

REM

Masakbay Rakhat aka Rem Born in 30.03.2000, Almaty Height: 173 cm Kazakh Junior Clan, Älimuly, Jolshara Family: Mother, father, brother (Nurken) and little sister (Dilnaz)

Studies at Almaty’s college named after Tchaikovsky (choir conductor)

He is Mad Men’s vocalist and makes music for their songs

Rem’s favorite color is black

His fave movies are Slipt and Shutter Island

Rem made his first money as singing in Tois

Watches anime and his favorite is Naruto

Rem have dated 8 girl’s

Talks most from Madmen

Loves meat dishes

Have cat named Umi

Did leave from Madmen in March 2021, is now at TikTok House Bip House

Ideal girl (2017): A girl with whom it’s convenient at any circumstances

Bad habit: he can sometimes just lives inside his head

Rem collects action figures

Have run away from police (NTK interview 2020)

Dated two girls at same time (NTK interview 2020)

Rem have kissed a girl on first date (NTK interview 2020)

Came to MM when he was 14

Young

Erasyl Abdraliev aka Young Born in 01.08.2002, Almaty Family: mother

Is Mad Men’s youngest member

Erasyl was part of Madness (is still close with them!!)

Likes K-Pop, manga and anime

Young can speak Kazakh, Russian and English

He likes to watch videos of space and stars

Is afraid of heights

Likes to stare stars

His closest friends are Sula, Renat and Aldiyar

Did leave from Madmen in March 2021, nowadays is dance teacher in LY entertainment

Young can play dombra

He loves to play video games

When he joined to Madmen he worked really hard for becoming better at dancing

Tim

Timur Kurmangaliev Born in 20.06.1997, Almaty Tatar-Russian Family: mother, father and sister

His favorite good is pilaf

He was Mad Men’s visual and vocalist

Scared easily

Tim can play guitar

He is Mad Men’s shortest member

Lived in Moscow for a while in 2019 is now back to Almaty

He left from Mad Men in 8th November 2018

After he left from Madmen he worked for a while in MM

Ideal girl (2017): Charismatic, economic, well mannered, kind and responsive

[xanthicantag]

do all the ocean asks 🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊🌊

FINALLY, i’ve been waiting hours for this!!!!!!!

pearl: if you could travel anywhere in the world, where would you go and why?

i’d kinda just wanna travel and see people who i know around the world tbh cause i think that’d be neat

sails: describe your perfect partner.

Option 1. Haku from nartuo, 2. Rock Lee but he’s not bald, 3. just kinda someone who’s nice to me and doesn’t wanna pry into my past 4. Naruto

lighthouse: how much makeup do you wear?

none? i bite at my hands too much for nail polish and boy howdy do i sweat

shells: would you prefer to be a vampire or a werewolf?

hnnnnnnnnnnnn, werewolf big, vampire sexy, probably werewolf tbh but like, a dnd werewolf so i cann just flex on someone as a huge wolf

mermaid: most embarrassing moment?

oh god like every 5 minutes of my life. or when on a phone interview where i was asked if i was a U.S citizen i said” Well I’m born and raised in the USA, i guess” or when i fucked up a math problem that was basic addition in calc 3, really a lot of moments

turquoise: weirdest dream you’ve ever had?

i was at work, and a child leap on the counter and turned his face into a black hole, stealing all the spoons and then left, so i had no spoons and people were yelling at me about the spoons and like, shit that boy just, he just became a space anomaly

waves: favourite season and why?

fallllllllll because i can’t stand the heat or the cold

breakers: would you ever consider getting married?

ehhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh? maybe maybe not

seafoam: describe your ideal summer vacation.

it’s the sokka arc from the third book, but i’m sokka and it’s sick as hell

rain: if it were possible, what exotic animal would you keep as a pet?

i wouldn’t keep the shark as a pet, but him and me are bffs and i swim with him everyday

sunlight: least favourite song?

oooooooooooooo boy oooo man this is tough, uhhhh, hm, that taylor swift song, you know the one

marine: would you ever consider plastic surgery?

only if i could get some kinda sick as hell thing from it, like eyes that work, or a sword that is my spine

sea glass: what do you consider to be your best physical feature?

my hair? or my butt, or my eyes?

storm: do you like piercings and tattoos? Why or why not?

i don’t have any?, i don’t hate em

boardwalk: who is your favourite fictional couple?

so, as a hardcore NaruHina shipper first off, I was right, secondly, canon naruhina is not what i’m about since there was no build up for it, so really i’m here for narusasu or narugaara for canon

coral: if you had to describe your personality as a food, what would you be and why?

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, mac and cheese, it’s reliable and sometimes funny, but at the end of the day i’m noodles and cheese

nymph: old-fashioned or modern decor?

so i am in fact a slut for like cool ass gothic buildings, but also i like smaller decor to have more space

seawater: scariest movie you’ve ever watched?

uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhhhhhh, fuck man i hate scary movies and refuse to watch them, but probably the uh, purple people eater movie?

siren: in a fantasy setting, would you be a warrior, rogue or mage?

WARRIOR (i love me a big ol sword), or like a mage if warrior just isn’t viable

tempest: your favourite Pokemon?

Aggron motherfucker, spent, 6 days shiny breeding an aron sophomore year

tropic: what is your least favourite thing about your appearance?

hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, maybe everything, yeah everything

aquamarine: describe your dream date.

i confess to loving naruto, they also confess they love naruto, we naruto run somewhere and eat some yummy food, maybe see a movie or do something else that’s like fun but also casual

brine: gold or silver?

hmrmmmmmrmrm, gold shiny, silver shiny, me brain say both food

tidal: what is a colour that best describes your personality?

so like, i’m gonna reaaaaaaach here, and go way back to when i had a pesterchum and had a sweet ass purple color for the handle

azure: what is something that you do that makes you happy?

i don’t really get to fence anymore but god i love sword fighting

fog: describe where you think you’ll be in five years.

8 of my friends have recieved a summons from me to a location on a cliff over looking the ocean. they all arrive because it says i’ve mysteriously died and only they can solve it.  I trap them all there and force them to play curse of strahd until they win, the whole time i am dressed as strahd

coastline: what is your favourite flower?

roses!

shallows: what is your typical Starbucks order?

i don’t really go to starbucks so just whatever strikes my fancy the second i see it

voyage: what are your favourite names?

so recently i read a dnd book and the one race has a cool ass naming convention set that is illogical as hell and also logical as fuck so all the names like that, example Arkahtahn (my wizard boy)

shipwreck: do you have an OC? If so, describe them.

Tiffany is the ultimate dnd character i’ve ever played, and my ultimate oc. she big, she shoot lightning, accidental is a scion of a kinda evil god, big ol hammer, gay

cerulean: do you believe in true love? 

i mean, i guess? depends on what you think of as true love?

shoreline: if you could become fluent in another language, which would you pick and why?

arabic so i can be gay with my partner in their langauge

tsunami: describe a dream outfit of yours.

I am in a giant shark outfit, i’m talking shark shoes, shark socks, shark pants, shark underwear, shark shirt, shark gloves(it’s a gloves look you know) a sick ass shark jacket, and to top it all off, a naruto headband, to let the people know who i am 

riptide: are you introverted or extroverted? Are you happy with this?

fuck man idk, i like reading a book alone and doing a rail of cocaine with my 80 closest friends so who knows?

hurricane: describe a strange habit of yours.

hmmm, i collect these stickers, which are labels for feta cheese, and i use them to torment my friend Alison by hiding them on her person or in her living places.

[jouissezduprintemps]

Something to Gain, Chapter Nine: Some Things to Say

Rating: T Words: 3337 Fandom: Naruto Summary: Sequel to Something to Prove. Shikamaru and Temari navigate their relationship now that it’s in the public eye.

Something to Prove   First     Previous     Next

Gaara’s stoic expression faltered briefly, shock flickering over his face before it returned to normal. “This is… unexpected.” He crossed his arms over his chest as he leaned back against the wall, taking a moment to look out the window. “Although, I suppose the timing is convenient enough. Very few people know that Temari’s pregnancy was a ruse to begin with, so the actual presence of a fetus doesn’t change much.”

Temari sat cross-legged in the recliner, unfazed by her brother’s clinical and blunt language. She would have preferred a more discreet manner to tell her closest friends and family about the pregnancy, but her ever-practical brother decided that they needed to have a household meeting as soon as she was released from the hospital. “What exactly are you suggesting?”

“As far as I’m concerned, you managed to go through all the steps you need to before we even knew of the pregnancy. If you’re willing to follow through with the decision you gave the council, there’s not much else that needs to be done.”

“What did you say to the council?” Choji asked from the couch.

“That I am renouncing my claim and relocating to Konoha.” This time, the words carried much more weight as they came from her lips.

“Of course, this hinges on Lady Tsunade’s acceptance of the proposal,” Gaara added. “The approval of both kage is needed so that it can be labeled a relocation rather than a desertion.”

“We don’t need Temari ending up in a bingo book,” Kankuro joked.

“So this is really happening?” Ino looked around the room. “Because, I swear to god, if this is a joke-”

“It’s not, Ino.” Shikamaru glanced at his teammate.

“Then, is Temari coming back with us?”

“That might be for the best,” Shikamaru frowned as he thought. “The last thing we should do is send a bird with the message.”

Choji paled. “She’d kill you.”

“Yeah, well, this is the second meeting I’m going to have with her this month about me and Temari. She might still kill me over this.”

“You can’t go in there without a plan,” Ino added. “She’ll want to know everything. When she’ll be moving, when you want the wedding to be…”

“Whoa,” Temari jumped in. “We, uh, haven’t talked about any of that yet.”

Ino looked between Shikamaru and Temari. “You don’t really think she isn’t going to want you to get married, do you? If you tell her that the child of the next head of the Nara clan and a descendent of the kazekage clan is going to be born out of wedlock, she’ll lose her mind.”

“Lady Tsunade is progressive, but even she’d think that’s a little over the top,” Choji agreed, seeing Ino’s logic.

“You guys aren’t some random ninja. You’re the Hokage’s advisor and literal royalty.” Ino couldn’t believe they hadn’t thought of this. “Lady Tsunade’s the granddaughter of Lord First; the hokage position isn’t hereditary, but she’s on the same societal level as Temari. If anything, she’ll be harder on you for it.”

Kankuro coughed, drawing attention to himself. “I think you guys need to be sure if this is what you want. Talk it out before you leave, you know? I don’t want to be that guy, so don’t take this the wrong way, but… you could always consider the alternative and, you know, try again later.”

“Trust me, I’ve thought of that.” Temari shook her head. She sighed. “This is happening. All of it. No, it isn’t ideal, but it is what it is. It looks like we’re just going to have to roll with it.”

“When are you leaving?” Gaara rasped.

“If you don’t need us for the interrogation anymore, we can leave as soon as tomorrow.” Temari knew that it was best to just get everything over with.

Gaara nodded. “Alright, then. For now, just pack what you’ll need. We can worry about the rest when we hear back from Lady Tsunade.”

“Well,” Kankuro mused, “looks like we’re keeping all the baby shit.”

“Hand me that bag, would you?” Temari reached out her hand, wiggling her fingers in a gesture for Shikamaru to do as he was told. He placed the zippered bag in her hand, which was then added to the stack of items she was placing in a summoning scroll. It took a good deal of chakra to pack this way, but it conserved a significant amount of space.

“God, I can’t think straight. What else am I gonna need?” Temari complained. It would be easier to just pack everything she owned, but there was always a chance that Lady Tsunade would send her back to Suna. The effort didn’t make sense for the time being.

“Clothes,” Shikamaru suggested.

“Fuck. Right.” Temari began to pull clothes from her dresser, and her pajamas, underwear, civilian clothes, and fighting outfits began to stack on top of one-another on her bed.

“You’re sure you don’t want my help?”

“Yeah, I’ve got it.”

“Tema, you’re walking in circles.” Shikamaru caught her by the shoulders when she passed by. “Go add things to the scroll; I’ll get what you need.”

“But-”

“Trust me.”

She sighed, letting him have his way. She began to seal away her wardrobe, thinking aloud as she did so. “Ino’s right. We have to go in with a game plan. We need to have answers to whatever she wants to ask.”

Shikamaru hummed his agreement as he opened the door to the closet. “Well, let’s start with the basics. She’ll ask if we plan on keeping it.”

“Which we do.” Temari hesitated, giving him one last chance to object. Instead, he continued.

“She’ll want to know if we plan on raising it together.”

“We will.”

“She’ll want to know if we’re getting married.”

At this, Temari let him have a few more seconds to add something if he wanted to. “It makes sense.”

“Do you want to?”

“What?”

“Get married?”

Temari turned around, arching an eyebrow in amusement. “Really? That’s how you ask me?”

“I mean, it’s a yes or no question…”

“Where’s my ring?”

“Woman,” Shikamaru rolled his eyes. “I didn’t exactly plan this.”

“No ring, no answer.”

She was serious. Her tone was playful, but she was completely, one-hundred percent serious. “For fuck’s sake. I’ll get you a damn ring. I’ll even let you pick it out. But it’s eleven o’clock at night, and I’m not committing burglary because you want to be pedantic about it.”

“Can I get that in writing?”

“Now you’re trying to be troublesome.”

Temari shrugged. “Just showing you what you signed up for.” She turned back to the summoning scroll, packing away the last of her clothes. “Besides, you know my answer.”

Shikamaru brought over anything that had been hanging in her closet, setting it down before swooping in to give Temari a peck on the forehead in response. He opened Temari’s pack and began to tuck away the scrolls she’d already filled. He picked back up his train of thought. “She’ll want to know if you’re moving to the leaf.”

“Which I am.”

“I’d like to say that covers everything, but I can never get a read on her…”

“You know that’s because she’s never completely sober, right?”

Shikamaru froze, as though the thought never occurred to him before. That would explain so much… He shook his head, refocusing. “Are we bringing all the ‘baby shit,’ to quote your brother?”

“We won’t need anything like that for a while. Right now, it’d be unnecessary weight.” Temari passed Shikamaru the last scroll. When it left her hand, she had the sudden realization that all of this was agonizingly, unavoidably real. She couldn’t allow herself to fall into that trap, not now. She needed her wits about her. All that was left for them to do was take the plunge.

It took them the whole three days to return to Konoha. Despite her insistence that she was fine, Ino was relentless in her attempts at playing nurse, fussing over Temari’s chakra and energy levels. Ino made sure that she was fed, hydrated, and rested. She’d gone as far as to forbid Shikamaru from smoking, and he was itching for a cigarette after not having one for a week, thanks to their not-so-farfetched ruse in Suna.

Temari, it was decided, would join them as they debriefed the Hokage about the events in Suna. Her current predicament tied in closely, after all. Ino and Choji would try to stick around for backup, although it was likely that Tsunade would send them out of the office once the news was broken. All the same, it was worth a shot.

Shizune opened the door to Tsunade’s office and stood to the side, allowing the four ninja to enter. She hadn’t questioned Temari’s presence, although she couldn’t hide the curiosity that appeared in her eyes. Tsunade didn’t look up at them for several seconds, clearly in the middle of reading a document. Her pen scratched across the bottom of the packet, and she set it to the side, on top of a small stack. Only then did she turn her attention to the returned squad.

“Temari. I admit, I wasn’t expecting you back. I hope everything worked out okay?”

“Yes, Lady Tsunade. My brother apologizes for the lack of information you were given. He’d uncovered a rather dangerous information leak concerning the alliance between our villages.” Temari gave a small bow out of respect.

“Did he, now?” Tsunade didn’t bother concealing her interest. “Shikamaru?” She turned her attention to the squad leader, requesting his verbal report.

“Lord Kazekage sends his thanks. Our squad was indispensable in the apprehension of the leak. It was discovered that three senior members of the Suna council stood against the treaty and were actively working to sabotage it. Ino provided aid to the intelligence division during the interrogation. It seems that these three members were supplying intel to the remnants of the Akatsuki.”

“I see.” Tsunade laced her fingers together in front of her. “I can’t say that’s what I expected, but I’m glad to hear my judgement was correct in sending you three. The alliance between our villages is still fragile. I’m pleased to know that the Kazekage is taking care to keep the peace. Although,” she looked back to Temari, “I don’t understand what our diplomatic guest is doing here. I assumed you would stay in Suna. Did the Kazekage send you on further business?”

“He sent me with some… delicate intelligence that he wanted delivered in person.” Well, it wasn’t a lie.

“And what might that be?”

“It’s about my, ahem, personal relationship with the village, My Lady. There are a few conclusions Gaara has come to that he wants your agreement on.”

“Just spit it out, Temari.”

“Temari’s pregnant!” Ino exclaimed, gasping as she covered her mouth. All eyes in the room were on her, and she began to turn a violent shade of red. That wasn’t supposed to happen, but she just couldn’t take the tension. “I’m so sorry, please excuse me!” her words rushed as she fled through the door, removing herself from the situation. Silence remained several moments after her departure.

“Choji,” Tsunade flicked her eyes over at him.

“Yes, My Lady.” Choji gave his best friend an apologetic look before letting himself out of the office. Well, at least he could be of some help to Ino. He felt guilty about leaving Shikamaru and Temari to their fate, but he didn’t have much of a choice.

Tsunade’s nails drummed against the wooden desk. “Well?”

Shikamaru didn’t bother hiding the exasperated groan that came from his throat. His teammates were truly worthless. “I’m gonna kill her.”

Temari refused to make eye contact with the Hokage.

Tsunade huffed, sitting up straight. “You have two minutes to tell me what I want to hear.” Shikamaru opened his mouth to begin, but Tsunade silenced him with a wave of her hand. “Not you.”

Temari did her best to stand tall as she turned to Tsunade. “I was informed when I was in the hospital, suffering from a stab wound. The doctor that sees to my family said that I am four weeks along. Gaara and the council have been informed. The solution I think will provide the best outcome would be for me to relocate to Konoha and give up my claim to the kazekage line. This would appease the seniors who are worried about a half-Konoha child claiming the position. I have every intention of keeping the pregnancy, and, after some serious thought, Shikamaru and I have made the decision to marry. That is, should My Lady approve.”

Tsunade listened attentively before turning to Shikamaru. She didn’t say anything. Rather, she watched him. Her direct stare made him nervous, as though she was appraising him. Finally, she looked over to Shizune, who still wore her startled expression. She sighed, admitting, “This would be an incredible asset for our village. I’m surprised Suna would let you go so easily. The child’s combined genetics are sure to produce an impeccable ninja.” She turned her chair slightly and put her feet up on the edge of her desk. “As long as Suna doesn’t add any terms to the agreement, I will give my consent. Although, I assume you haven’t told your parents, Shikamaru?”

“No, My Lady.”

“I recommend you do so, and soon. Temari, I would like for you to come to the hospital so that I can examine you myself. Although I trust the doctors in Suna, I always prefer to see things for myself. If you’re uncomfortable, I could have Sakura take my place.”

“I don’t have a problem with it,” Temari assured her.

“Good. I’m putting a lot of faith in the two of you. You’re both highly intelligent, and it’s clear you’ve thought this through. Just… do me the favor of making it seem intentional to the others. You know, engagement happened first and whatnot. I don’t need any more of you kids running around and getting pregnant. Just be good role models from now on, okay?”

“Yes, My Lady.” Temari spoke for them both, forcing Shikamaru down into a bow as she performed her own.  Before Tsunade could add anything else, the pair made a hasty exit through the double doors.

Choji and Ino waited on the other side. As soon as the doors shut, Ino launched into a frantic apology. “Oh my god, guys. I’m so sorry. It just slipped out. I-”

“It’s okay, Ino.” Temari put a hand on her friend’s shoulder. “It worked out well. You just sort of ripped off the bandage, so to speak. It helped us get it over with more quickly.”

“So, she’s cool?” Choji asked.

“Yeah, seems like it.” Shikamaru stuck his hands in his pockets.

“What now?” Ino asked her friends. There still seemed like there was so much to do before the day was done.

“Now,” Temari smirked, “I was told that I could pick out my own ring.”

Ino’s eyes widened and she clapped her hands together. “I want to come!”

This was what Temari expected her to say. Ino’s tastes were far more extravagant than her own, so she wouldn’t be much help in the actual process. She could, however, make Shikamaru squirm a little while they were in the store. “Of course!”

“Dude, when did you propose?” Choji’s voice showed his hurt at being left out of such an important life event.

“A few days ago,” Shikamaru admitted, only to be shouted at by Ino.

“You proposed to her without a ring?! Shikamaru! I trained you better than that!”

“I’m not a dog, Ino.”

“That’s literally step one of proposing! Get ring, ask girl. That’s it! It’s not hard!” She threw her hands in the air. “At least tell me you were romantic about it.”

“Come on, Temari doesn’t care about that stuff.”

“Shikamaru, she’s going to be telling that story for the rest of her life. You propose to her, with no ring, and do I even want to know how you did it?”

This was getting a little intense, even for Temari. “Cut him some slack, Ino. It’s not like any of this has been traditional.”

“How did he ask?”

“Come on, Ino.”

“Temari, you look me in the eyes and tell me what that idiot said to you when he proposed.”

Temari grimaced, aware that the truth would sound terrible to anyone else. “‘Do you want to?’”

“Yes,” Ino insisted. “Now just tell me.”

“No. Ino. ‘Do you want to?’”

Ino turned to look at Shikamaru, completely hopeless. “You’re fucking kidding me.”

“Come on, Ino. Shikamaru’s just not that kind of guy. I mean, if Temari doesn’t have a problem with it, it’s no big deal.” Choji tried his best to defend his friend from Ino’s wrath.

“You are so doing this over,” Ino ordered, poking him in the chest. “Now, let’s go!” She turned, taking Temari by the hand and pulling her down the hall. “Trust me, you’ll thank me for this when everyone and their cousin is asking for your story.” To herself, she grumbled, “‘Do you want to?’ – what the fuck.”

Ino fluttered from display to display, asking to see every piece that caught her eye. She’d stopped looking exclusively at rings quite a while ago, and was now trying on anything that struck her fancy. The attendant was clearly annoyed when it became obvious that she had no intention of buying any of the items. She either didn’t pick up on or refused to acknowledge his body language. Every now and again, she’d call Temari over, chatter about a particular piece, and then make her way further down the glass cabinet.

Temari had stopped in front of a single display, and she’d been studying it for quite a while when the attendant broke himself away from Ino long enough to help. She slipped the yellow-gold band on her finger, pleased with its simplicity. Rather than a large stone, it was decorated with a handful of small ones interspersed among ornate scrollwork on the band. When Ino was far enough away not to be a hazard, Shikamaru crossed the store to get a look at the piece Temari had set her eyes on.

“It’s cheaper if it’s purchased as a full set,” the attendant informed them, handing Shikamaru a price card from within the display. He blanched at the number, doing some quick math in his head. Although he tried to keep Temari from seeing the price, she snatched it from his hand.

She looked down at the price and frowned for a brief moment. “We’ll take it,” she told the attendant, who was clearly happy to make a sale.

“Tema, I-” Shikamaru began, stammering.

“Don’t worry about it. We’re splitting it.” Temari smiled her large grin which exposed her teeth.

“We what?”

“Don’t be stupid, Shikamaru. If you start with that ‘I’m the man and you’re the woman’ bullshit, I’ll kick your ass. It’s what I want, and it’s what we’re doing.” She took his hand and pulled him along after the attendant. “This isn’t just for you, you know.”

Most men would have killed for such a lucky break, but not Shikamaru. Although he’d worked over the years to stifle the sexism he internalized as a child, there was still a part of him that nagged at the notion of her paying anything. His mind only settled when he convinced himself that she was simply helping pay for the other half of the set. Yeah, that made sense. He could live with that.

Temari relinquished the ring, which the attendant put into a small box along with the two wedding bands that came with the set. For a moment, she nearly panicked at the reality, seeing them together like that. Shikamaru gave her hand a squeeze before letting go to get his wallet, and the gesture brought her back to earth. This was what she wanted, and she was confident in that.

[sharigone]

Summary:  “ Her endless pools reflected the moon in the most wonderful way.  In some weird way, I felt connected to Hinata and almost protective over her.  I wanted things to go her way and I’d do my hardest to help.” College AU. Rated T, might be changed to M later.

Pairing: NaruHina

Bleachers Chapter 5: How Could a Moment Last Forever

I could hear Naruto shouting happily as he left my dorm and I couldn’t believe that this was all happening. Pinching myself didn’t wake me from what I thought was a dream. Everything was real and I felt so happy that I could scream. I didn’t even notice Sakura and Ino smiling at me knowingly on our beds.

“He’s had it bad for you for quite a long time, Hinata. But he didn’t know it himself that idiot.” Ino waved her nail file at me.

“Oh, you have to tell us everything!” Sakura kicked her legs excitedly as I put down my bag and joined them.

Where do I even begin?

“Well, we auditioned for the play today and we did that scene I was worried about doing and ended up getting the part without the callbacks.” I braided a few strands of my hair.

“You guys kissed!” Ino gasped.

“Hush, Ino! She isn’t finished!” Sakura waved.

“And for a moment, he leaned in to kiss me during the audition and it felt like he wanted to do it out of his own free will and not just because of that’s what our characters are supposed to do.”

“But?” Ino pressed.

“But we got interrupted.” I bit my lip, “And so my small hope just went away until we were in his room, playing video games.  And one thing lead to another and he… kissed me.”

“Oh, Hinata! That’s just so sweet.” Sakura wrapped her arm around me.

“Who knew, Mr. Loudmouth could be so suave.” Ino sighed dreamily.

I thought about how gentle he was with me, how he tasted exactly like how imagined,  the way his blue eyes looked deep within me and found resolve. I didn’t think I could possibly love him more than I already did until that moment. How could a moment last forever?

“I’ve loved him for such a long time and I can’t believe that he even felt an ounce of how I feel.” I covered my cheeks and relived the memory.

Sakura and Ino gave each other a look and I knew they were having one of their silent conversations.  Sometimes I hate being so clueless.

“What is it?” I looked at the both of them.

“Oh, sweet sweet Hinata. You haven’t had the slightest clue.” Sakura and Ino hugged me.

__

When I walked inside my dorm the guys hooted and threw pillows at me.  Of course, Sasuke couldn’t resist not telling them about catching me and Hinata in a middle of a makeout session. What I’d give to kiss her again.

“Get that dorky grin off your face, you didn’t even go second base.” Sasuke got up and got the game ready.

“Not even second base?” Kiba gaped.

I kicked a pillow at him and sat down on the swivel chair, “Not everyone is a pervert!”

It was silent for a few seconds before we all bursted out laughing because we knew I could be just as bad. But I didn’t feel the need to behave that way with Hinata. I’ve never gone that far with anyone and I’m pretty sure she hasn’t either seeing how she shared her first kiss with me. I wanted to do things right with Hinata. Even without the labels, she’s my girl and I’m her guy. My girl, I liked the sound of that.

“So the idiot finally realizes that she has the biggest crush on him.” Shikamaru stretched out, “What a drag, it took you long enough.”

“I can’t help that!” I stuck my tongue out at him.

“She gave you all the signs though. Blushing, staring, nervousness, fumbling of the words. It was as obvious as the sky being blue.” Sai said in a matter-of-fact tone, “Just like Ino likes me. It didn’t take me years to see that though.”

“We all can’t be book readers like you, Sai.” I squinted my eyes and chose my character.

“It’s common sense to me.” Kiba mumbled.

“Ah, shut up! I know I’m dense!”

I got my ass handed to me twice today and I wasn’t having it. But the game I played with the guys wasn’t my favorite game so I see why I lost this one. I felt like I was losing my mind more though. Every time I blink all I see is her. Her opal eyes, her kind smile, her sweet blush, her soft lips. It’s as if all the lost time I had without knowing how she felt and my own feelings came at me all at once. Hinata loves me, there was no way of unseeing that. She has loved me for a long time and I felt a pang of guilt for not seeing it sooner.  And I knew that the feelings I have for her now would fester into something bigger that would equal to what she has for me.  I wouldn’t be surprised if it already has progressed so far and I’m just too dumb to realize it.

She was on my mind when I was sitting in my lecture, when I showered when I got back to my room, when I tossed and turned at night. I’ve finally had enough of it and put on my jacket and shoes to go find her at her dorm room. It was raining and I knew she would probably get worried if I showed up this late but I need to see her. I tapped on her door and I heard her get out of bed and answer the door.

“Naruto? What are you doing here?” she rubbed her eyes.

I wordlessly moved towards her and pressed my lips against her’s. She seemed a little shocked at first but didn’t hesitate to kiss me back, her hands unzipping my rain-soaked jacket. I guess I forgot to put on my shirt before I decided to come here and she parted away and blushed madly.

“I’m sorry.” I scratched the back of my head nervously.

She shook her head and took my hand in her’s, “It’s so late.”

“I know but I need to be near you.” I averted my gaze, “I, uh, yeah that probably was a bad idea. I’ll go back.”

“No.” she led me into her room.

Sakura was sleeping across the room and stirred only a little bit. I made sure to stay quiet while I took off my shoes. Hinata crawled into her bed and opened her arms up to me so I could lay with her. I felt myself get more nervous as I joined her, nestling my head in the crook of my neck while her fingertips soothed my bare back.

“How did you bear it?” I whispered.

“It wasn’t easy but it got easier with time.”

“I know, Hinata.” I pulled away to look at her, “I know that you love me.”

“Naruto, I--” her eyes widened.

“And it’s okay, I don’t feel pressured.”

“You don’t have to love me back.”

“I know but I will. I can’t help myself.”

She surprised me by leaning in to kiss me, her small hands raking through my hair. My hand held her jaw as I deepened the kiss, I wouldn’t let it get further than this. She felt so warm to my touch and it felt good to be so close to her.  It made me think that I’d have a harder time being away from her knowing that being with her meant everything.

“I don’t want you to go back.” she whispered against my lips before burying her face in my chest, “I feel so selfish.”

I laughed a little and played with the ends of her hair, “You thought I’d leave my girl behind? Not a chance.”

She did her shy smile and wrapped her arms around me, “I’ll always be your girl.”

I ran my fingers up and down her arm until she fell asleep and then sleep came for me soon after. I’d never have to sleep alone ever again as long as I have her. The morning sun rose and peeked through her curtains and she has never looked so beautiful.

“Well good morning to you too.” Sakura said while eating her bowl of cereal.

“Good morning.” I rubbed my eyes and looked in her direction.

She giggled and dunked her spoon back in her bowl, “Naruto, if she gets up and she doesn’t have pants on, I’m going to punch the living hell out of you.”

“Sakura, don’t worry.” I groaned, “I’m not a pig.”

“You love her.” she stated.

I knew I was blushing when I looked down at Hinata.

“You’ve always have and you're finally realizing it.” Sakura smiled, getting up to put her bowl in the sink.

“I won’t say it until I really know.”

“You’re finally growing up, Naruto.” Sakura picked up her bag, “I’m proud of you.”

That’s probably the nicest thing she has ever said to me. She waved her keys at me before she left to probably go to her class. Hinata started to stir when the door shut before she opened up her eyes. Her face lit up when she realized that I was still there with her and she nuzzled herself back into my chest.

“Don’t you have class soon?” she asked.

“Not until another hour.”

She sat up and threw her hair into a bun before crawling back into my lap, “I guess you should go back and get ready.”

“I wish I could stay here.” I hugged her against me, “But I will see you soon enough.”

“Mmhmm.”

I kissed her temple and stood her on the floor, grabbing my jacket and slipping on my shoes. As ridiculous as it is, I really didn’t want to leave her, especially when she looked at me with those eyes. I almost lost it.

“Have a good day in class, Naruto. I’ll meet you in the student circle.” she kissed my cheek for good measure before she pushed me out the door, “Don’t give me that look now.”

I pouted for a little bit before smiling at her and walking in the direction of my class. It dragged on and on but as promised she was there waiting for me with a basket in her hand.

“What’s this?” I pointed.

“I thought it would be nice if we had lunch out on the field.” she waved the basket around.

“Oh, so like a date?” I smirked.

Her face lit up and she kicked her feet nervously, “Uh, I, I mean--”

“I’d love to.” I grabbed her free hand and walked with her.

“You do this on purpose.” she puffed out her cheeks and lightly hit me with the basket.

“I’m sorry, I had to!” I snickered, “You make it so easy.”

Hinata stopped us at this field in between the buildings and I helped her spread out her large blanket. She arranged our lunch boxes and took out our water from her basket and sat down beside me.

She picked up her lunch box and looked over at me, “Enjoy, I hope you like it.”

“Of course I’ll like it.” I took out my chopsticks and started eating.

I’ve never had anything like it. Totally beats the instant ramen I usually make and the crap they sell here at the university. I looked over at her and saw her laughing silently.

“What?”

“Oh it’s nothing. You seem to like it a lot.”

“I’ve never had anything like it.” I took another bite.

She looked down at her lunch box and thought for a moment, “I’m sorry, it must’ve slipped my mind.”

I knew what she was talking about.  My parents passed away shortly after I was born and I’ve been living with my godfather ever since. Home Cooked meals were never a thing.

“Don’t get worked up about it.” I wrapped an arm around her, “I’ll never feel alone again if I have you.”

“I’ll make sure of it.” she promised.

We finished eating our food and then we spent the rest of the afternoon relaxing under the sun. I listened as Hinata read over her lines. Her voice was soft and relaxed me. I watched her face as she emphasized the emotion that her character was feeling. She really wanted this scholarship.

“Hey, Hinata. What do you wanna be?”

“A biology teacher.” she smiled, “I want to make learning fun. What about you?”

“Is it weird that I haven’t decided yet?”

“Not at all.” she smiled and played with the ends of my hair, “It’s okay to be undecided.”

“At first I wanted to be a politician, then a member of the CIA, and now? It’s just blank.” I frowned, “I just don’t know what I’m good at.”

“You’re good at plenty of things.” Hinata furrowed her brows, “Like motivating people, making them laugh, helping others in need… Being a person to count on.”

I thought about it and more often than not, people do tell me that I am helpful.

“Have you thought about psychology?” Hinata asked.

“I actually haven’t. But I think I’ll try it out thanks to you.”

“I’m glad I could help.”

Last Chapter | Next Chapter

[chiyume]

Could you do 9 and 20 (Do you like anime / manga) and 20 again (favorite music genre), pretty please?

@madmooninc Of course I can, love ^^ 

9. Tattoos I want

Well, as I wrote in another one of these asks, I am thinking about covering up the current tattoo I have on my lower back. It’s a difficult thing, though, because since it’s a cover up, the design has to be based a lot on the tattoo I currently have, so it’s gonna have to be pretty big. Most likely, it’s going to curl up along my left hip, towards the ribs, and then down along the right hip, to create a sort of wave pattern, making it look more feminine and less “square”.

I know I want roses. Possibly a peacock feather and some sort of skull element in there. Very classic imagery, because the symbolism of the classics means a lot to me. Probably will focus a lot on black and white, with shading, and a splash of color to certain elements of it (the feather, maybe a single rose in bright red?) I haven’t decided. It’s a work in progress, still :)

I’m also planning to have a tattoo done when I finish writing my book, as a sort of milestone, but I haven’t decided what it’ll be yet. It’ll most likely be some sort of circle or diamond shaped, and I’ll probably have it placed on the nape of my neck.

Tattoos are dangerous things, though, because the more you get, the more you want lol XD These two are the ones I KNOW I want to have made. What happens after that, only time will tell.

20. Do you like anime / manga?

Manga, not so much, but I used to watch a LOT of anime. Naruto and Naruto Shippuuden were the very reason I started writing fanfiction, which has turned out to be a very good decision lol. The last anime I watched was Free! Iwatobi Swim Club, which I absolutely fell in love with (Ugh, Rin, so damaged, so pure, my little shark baby. And Makoto, my gentle giant with the big heart and lovely voice. ). I haven’t watched any more since then, though. I discovered Stucky and Marvel, aaaand yeah, you get the picture lol.

Might try and catch up with the anime world again though. This Yuuri on Ice thing seems quite popular, and since you follow me, you ought to know how much I adore pretty gay boys in love, haha. We’ll see, one day, maybe :)

20. Favorite music genre?

Honey, listen, I have 69,3 GB, 16 023 files, and 787 folders of music on my computer. If you think picking just ONE genre to mark down as my favorite is going to be easy, then oohhh, boy, let me explain you a thing.

However, having gone through said folders, I can announce that I appear to be a hoarder of emo/grunge/punk/metalcore rock music. I can’t really put a label on it (I even googled for one, didn’t find any), so I’m just gonna randomly list a few of the band/artists I tend to fall back on, on a regular basis.

Dead by April

Volbeat

Linkin Park

Fallout Boy

Panic! at the Disco

Green Day

Three Days Grace

Simple Plan

Evanescence

Good Charlotte

Skillet

Billy Talent

Breaking Benjamin

Thousand Foot Krutch

The Used

Sum 41

3 Doors Down

System of a Down

Korn

Maroon 5

Adam Lambert

So yeah, there you have it. What can I say, I’m a sucker for whatever songs you can sing harmonies to, which I do. A lot. Like, all the time. XD It’s a guilty pleasure lol.

Thank you so much for the ask, honey ^^