#yeah i totally watch spiderman for the plot

[not-neverland06]

you're not her

The 'Worst' Logan x fem!mutant!reader

a/n: really wanted to write for the worst logan so I found a streaming site so I could finally watch the new Deadpool movie (yay pirating) (this is totally hypothetical and a joke to the feds lurking) I was going to just read the wiki plot but I don’t think that was going to cut it Again, using the same superhero name/powers. It’s not an OC I swear, it just makes sense in comic book movies to have some alternate name and I’m not creative enough to come up with multiple different supe names. Summary: You hate him, you really fucking hate him at first. He’s cruel and constantly reminds you that you’ll never be the hero he knew. You’re not her and he’s made that abundantly clear. But what are you supposed to do when he’s suddenly your new roommate and you have no choice but to wake up to his face every day? I feel sad because I don’t think I did the angst justice with this one. But if I keep staring at it trying to fix it, then I’m never going to post it. (This is a long one guys) Angst with a happy ending (because I’m a little bitch) Makeout scenes and smut towards the very end 18+ MDNI

You don’t know how you got here, but you know you’re mad at whoever dragged you into this shit. You don’t think it would be wild to assume it was Wade’s fault. Usually, when something goes wrong in your life it’s on him. 

What you do know; you look like shit. Wade and Wolverine are both standing over you in their awesome ass uniforms and you’re still in your fucking pajamas. How are you supposed to be badass and save the world in pants that have Spiderman’s face plastered all over them?

“I’m gonna fucking kill you, Wade,” you growl at him. 

He places his hand daintily on his chest and waves you off, “Save that for the bedroom, pookie.”

You grit your teeth and glare up at him, Wolverine gives him a similarly disgusted look. “Fuckin’ ridiculous,” you grumble under your breath. You get to your feet and brush yourself off, finally looking around and taking in wherever the fuck he’s dragged you. “Where are we?”

“The void,” Wade responds, voice ridiculously dramatic. You look around and throw your hands up in defeat. 

“What the fuck, Wade? Why did you drag me with you into this?” You look over at the Wolverine beside him. He hasn’t stopped glaring at you both and his claws are out, clearly ready to just eviscerate you. “Who the fuck is this?”

“Okay, wow, language, Flux. I’m disappointed in you.”

“Eat me-”

You’re cut off by the knock-off Wolverine standing a few feet behind you both. “Flux?” He demands, voice so low you almost can’t hear him. Both you and Wade’s heads whip around to face him. Thus far he’s been relatively silent, you nearly started to wonder if he was mute. 

“It’s her X-Man name,” Wade tells him, gushing like it’s some big deal. “Impressive, huh?” You don’t bother correcting him that it was your X-Men name. Can’t exactly call yourself that if they booted you off the team for being a crappy superhero. 

Logan snorts and shakes his head. He stalks towards you and you nearly fall over in your attempt to scramble back from him. “You,” he demands, claws pointed at you threateningly. “You’re Flux?”

Wade hisses, watching as Logan swipes out at you. “Alright, peanut, let’s put the claws away and take a deep grounding breath.”

“Shut the fuck up,” Logan snaps at Wade. He turns to glare at him and you take the opportunity to scramble behind your friend for protection. At least if he gets stabbed, he’ll heal. “You,” he scoffs and it trails off into a laugh. There’s no humor behind it, he's just a dick. “You are a fucking joke compared to my Flux.”

The ground underneath you rattles, pebbles bouncing off the cracked desert and ricocheting off their boots. Wade quickly moves away from you, shoving you forward so he’s not in the line of fire. “Yeah, well you’re just an alcoholic fuck who could never hold a candle to my Logan.” 

You can feel energy brewing at the tips of your fingers, waves, and waves of hate building up within you. The man across from you feels the shift, the static suddenly permeating the air around you both. You let your power build and build…

The pebbles drop back to the ground and you stumble back from Logan, nose bleeding from overextending yourself. “Shit,” you mutter, wiping at your face with the back of your hand and shaking your head. 

Logan laughs again, it echoes through the stormy sky and you wish you had any control over your powers so you could just send him flying. Or, better yet, turn his bones into liquid and flip him inside out. “Oh,” he lets out a long exhale, glaring at both of you. “This is fuckin’ ridiculous.” The faux smile drops from his face and he raises his voice just loud enough to make you jump, “Just one big fuckin’ joke!”

You have about five seconds to dive to the side before Logan is lunging at Wade. “Wait, wait, wait we can talk about this!” Wade shouts, but it’s too late, he’s already on the ground getting his head caved in. 

You let out a rough sigh, stumbling off to the side. You’re drained from that shitshow of powers. You barely made a few rocks levitate and you feel like you’re going to pass out. You walk away from the two men and throw yourself on the ground, trying to reorient yourself while they fight like wild animals. 

You can hear them in the background, stabbing and shooting like they’re aiming to kill. Too bad neither of them can die. It’d save you a hell of a headache.  They run past you, Logan’s got his claws buried in Wade’s gut while Wade’s desperately firing off his gun into Logan’s chest. 

Your head rolls weakly to the side and you mutter out a pathetic, “No, stop. Don’t kill each other.” As expected, neither of them listens to you. They keep fighting, showing no signs of stopping. 

There’s a moment of silence after about ten minutes of nothing but grunts and insults. You peak your head up in interest. Logan got his claws posed over Wade’s throat. You wonder if decapitation would actually kill him or if he’d somehow manage to survive that. 

Wade doesn’t seem interested in testing out the theory, “They can fix it!” Wade shouts, “They can fix your timeline. I just need your help saving mine.”

Your eyes widen and you meet Wade’s masked gaze over Logan’s shoulders. The white slits widen and he minutely shakes his head, telling you not to say anything. Like, maybe, that neither of you has any fucking clue if the TVA is capable of even fixing timelines like that. 

You know Wade is desperate when he makes that promise. It’s the only reason he would say something so stupid. It’s a blatant lie, one pulled so far out of Wade’s ass you’re genuinely surprised that Logan can’t smell the bullshit. Whatever happened in his universe must have been horrible for him to ever believe anything that comes out of any Deadpool’s mouth. 

It’s a long moment before Logan finally pulls his claws out of Wade. Your friend slumps forward in relief as Logan stalks away from him. You glare at Wade from where you are on the ground, “That was fucking stupid,” you snipe at him. He gets to his feet, walks over to you, and forcefully yanks you to your feet. 

“Not a goddamn word,” he warns, but you aren’t exactly threatened by him when he's got three holes in his head from Logan’s claws. Still, you hold your hands up and acquiesce, following after him as he chases down Logan. 

Your mind is still fuzzy when you are captured by Cassandra. You're recovering from overextending yourself, eyes blurring and limbs going limp like jello when her army of henchmen circle you all. 

You finally feel yourself starting to come back to your body when you wake up tied to Johnny. “And,” Wade draws the word out, waiting until you lift your head to finish, “there she is! Happy you could join us, princess. Mind turning these ropes into dust for me?”

You groan and let your head slump onto Johnny’s shoulder. He smirks and glances down at you. “Oh fuck off, both of you. I can’t do shit right now and you know it, Wade, I’m drained.” 

Logan is glaring at you, but there’s less hate in his glare and more confusion now. “Can you do anything?”

You narrow your eyes at him, lips screwed up while you try to decide if he’s being an asshole or genuine. “Hard of hearing or something old man? I’m drained,” you reiterate, your tone a little too bitchy. 

Logan narrows his eyes, grunting something foul under his breath. Wade interferes before you can piss each other off anymore. “She had an accident, her brain’s a little broken now. But it’s fine! Whose isn’t?”

You huff and throw yourself back against the cage you’re all being transported in. You feel eyes on the side of your head and slowly look over to see Johnny grinning at you. “Hey, you know I’ve met one of your variants-”

“Don’t give a fuck,” you interrupt. You hear Wade snicker under his mask, giving you an encouraging thumbs up even with his hands bound. You were both a little disappointed it wasn’t Captain America lurking under that cloak. But at least this guy isn’t such a prude he won’t cuss. 

For the next five minutes, you’re on the receiving end of a very enthusiastically vulgar rant about just what a cunt Cassandra Nova is. He’s still not even finished by the time you reach the gates to her lair.

Your eyes widen when you see all the people lurking around the walls. Most of them you recognize as people you’ve put away or killed in your world. But there’s something just minutely different about them than the version you faced in your timeline. Their eye color or outfit is always just slightly off. 

The familiar faces are almost a relief. But there is nothing comforting about knowing you're outnumbered two hundred to four. The cage is tipped over and you go rolling out, you grunt as Johnny’s elbow digs into your ribs. 

Before you can even attempt to shove him off, the ropes are whipped off of you and you’re dragged by an invisible force across the ground. Rocks and sand scrape across your tender skin and bury themselves deep in your pores. You hiss in pain when you finally come to a stop and your body is your own again. 

A groan slips through your parted lips unbidden as you struggle onto your knees. Your pajamas are ripped practically everywhere and you feel like you might as well be naked at this point. You really wished that you at least had a chance to change before you were kidnapped to another universe. 

The woman you presume to be Cassandra Nova is currently fucking Wade’s skull with her freakish telepathy fingers. Johnny’s a pile of guts and bones on the floor and you have no fucking clue where she flung Logan to. 

You get to your feet, shaking your head and reorienting yourself. In a second she’s in front of you, head tilted to the side while she regards you curiously. “Woah,” you jump back, glaring at her outstretched hand. 

“Careful,” Wade warns her breathlessly, still clutching his head. “Flux here has a pathological fear of bald people.”

You nod, “It’s true, you can imagine how strained my relationship with your brother was.” Cassandra circles you, a devious tilt to her lips. Your eyes track her, unwilling to take your gaze off her for even a second. You feel like a rabbit, facing down a fox that’s made its way into your burrow. 

“Curious,” she mutters. “I’ve seen quite a few of you down here before. But,” she chuckles and before you can move her hand is shoving its way into your brain. You scream, there’s an agonizing burn as her fingers probe under your eyes and dig through the deepest part of your subconscious. It feels like someone’s taking a shovel and ripping up your worst traumas. “None of them have been so weak.”

Wonderful, even she wants to insult you. You can feel the way she’s plucking through your thoughts, tossing aside the ones she doesn’t like. Images of your childhood are flashing across your vision. You can no longer see the world around you, it’s like every one of your worst memories is being played on a projector. 

“Ah,” she clicks her tongue and jerks your neck around until you’re looking at something you’ve tried to forget for years. “Here it is. How easy it would be for me to simply unblock those powers of yours.” She smiles, her face appearing before you and blocking out the bloodshed. “It would make this far more entertaining for me, what do you say?”

Your teeth are clenched so tightly you’re surprised they haven’t cracked yet. It’s hard to get the words out when her fingers are still dancing through your skull. “Fuck you,” you finally spit out. She releases you suddenly, and you surge forward with a gasp, clutching at your skull desperately. 

You half expect your brains to begin leaking from your nose and eyes. But nothing happens, despite feeling incredibly violated, everything is still in its proper place. Cassandra walks past you like everything is fine and dandy in the world. “Well, as much as I would love to see those powers of yours in action again, Flux, I’m afraid Alioth must eat.”

Before you can ask what she's talking about there’s a loud rumble. Like thunder cracking through the sky and land, the ground underneath you shakes. Cracks form under your feet and the henchmen around you all start desperately racing for cover. 

You turn around, staring wide-eyed at the purple cloud of death and destruction steadily moving across the sky. A face breaks through the clouds, grinning down at you. Purple lightning hits the ground and the villain next to you explodes into nothing but dust. 

“Shit!” You shout, turning around and running to try and avoid getting zapped up next. There’s no coming back from this one. Once this monster gets you, not even god could save you. 

Suddenly, an arm wraps around your waist, lifting you off your feet. “No time for consent, we’ve got to get the fuck outta here!” Wade shouts in your ear. Logan is standing next to some robot leg, ripping out cords until a jet on the back fires up. Wade leaps onto the boot, wrapping an arm around Logan’s legs as you’re all shot into the sky. 

You’d scream if you weren’t trying not to throw up. You hurtle through the sky at speeds that have your skin nearly ripping off your skull. The rocket on the back of the leg starts to sputter out. The flames flickering out and then back to life. It steadily begins to drop until you’re plummeting headfirst towards the ground. 

Wade wraps himself around you, tossing himself off the boot so he can brace your fall. You hear and feel nearly all of his bones break under your weight. For a moment it feels like you’re laying on warm jello as you try and catch your breath. 

“Nailed it,” he mutters weakly. You’re pretty sure he can’t breathe, a rib having pierced his lung in the fall. A shadow looms over you and you glance up to find Logan glaring down at you. You stare at him apprehensively, half expecting him to unsheathe his claws and just end you right here. 

Instead, to your surprise, he holds a hand out. You look at it with suspicion, glaring back up at him. “Fucks sake,” he mutters. He reaches down, roughly grabbing your hand and jerking you to your feet. You feel the warmth of Wade’s blood on your back and grimace. 

“Thanks,” you mutter, still not entirely trusting of him. 

He purses his lips into a thin line, backing awkwardly away from you. He just nods and starts surveying the land around you. It feels less like trying to figure out where you all landed and more like awkwardly avoiding eye contact. 

The whole interaction leaves you feeling odd. “Well, that was as awkward as two virgins on prom night,” Wade loudly announces as he jumps to his feet. You whip around and send him a dirty look but his attention has already been snagged by something else. Lately, you’ve been considering grounding up Adderall and slipping it into his breakfast, you think it might do him some good. 

What’s got to be the fugliest dog you’ve ever seen in your life bounds towards Wade. He drops to his knees, ripping off his mask and opening his arms wide to the mutt. You grimace, taking a step back when she starts licking his face. “Oh, that’s just wrong.”

Thankfully dogless, you steal Nicepool’s Honda Odyssey - much to Wade’s chagrin. Logan’s in the front seat, Wade beside him. You’re sitting in the back, rubbing your temples and trying to get rid of the raging migraine you’ve had since Cassandra finger blasted your brain. 

You’ve been zoning in and out of the conversation happening in the front seat of the car. But Logan suddenly slams on the brakes and you go hurtling forward. Without even looking at you, both their arms shoot out, blocking you from flying through the windshield. 

Your face scrunches up as you look at both their arms, it feels like being saved by an overbearing soccer mom. “Buckle up, princess,” Wade tells you. He shoves you back into your seat and you look between the two men suspiciously. 

“Did you just say if?” Logan growls, glaring at Wade. Your face drops, finally realizing what you’d missed. 

Wade lets out a weak chuckle, “Slip of the tongue?” Logan growls and the claws come out. Wade raises his hands, “Okay, let’s put a brake on the crazy train. I wasn’t lying it was just an educated,” for the first time in your friendship Wade is actually speechless. You’re shocked by the silence. Until, of course, he runs his mouth again and comes up with the lamest cop-out you’ve ever heard. “It was an educated wish that they could fix your timeline, alright?”

Logan doesn’t give much of a warning except a low growl before he shoves his claws deep into Wade’s thigh. “You motherfucker!”

“Hey!” You shout, jumping forward and ripping Logan’s claws out of Wade’s leg. “Look, we’re trying to save our whole fucking universe. Can you blame him for lying?” You regret opening your mouth pretty much immediately. 

You should have just stayed out of this, it wasn’t any of your business. And if they wanted to be two dumbasses and fucking tear each other apart then so be it. But you never should have drawn attention to yourself. 

“Shut the fuck up,” Logan shouts at you. It’s so startling, coming from him. You’re still associating him with the man you’d looked up to growing up. Your Wolverine was a hero. He was the reason you wanted to be an X-Man. And they look exactly the same, it’s nearly impossible for you to separate this one from the one you knew. 

But it's easier now. Because the man you’d known would never be so cruel and jaded to the world. Not like this. “Why the fuck are you even here? You’re just some watered-down knockoff of a real hero. You are nothing, you’re worth nothing. It’s a fucking joke that you’re alive and the woman I knew is buried six feet deep. If there was anything right in the world you would be in a grave somewhere crawling with maggots.”

Your eyes water without your permission. You don’t know this man. Yet, he has the face of your greatest hero and the man who you’d grown up hearing stories about. It’s like facing everything you’ve ever wanted to be and having it shout your deepest fears and insecurities back at you. He’s just confirming something you’ve known for years. You never deserved the title of being an X-Man. You never deserved the uniform or anything that came with it. 

Your breaths are coming short and fast, it feels like your lungs are constricting. You worry you won’t be able to get air in but he doesn’t care. No, he keeps going. “You follow this fucking clown around and you contribute nothing to the world. You’re never gonna save your fucking timeline. You can’t even make a few rocks float.” It’s not the words that hurt you next. It’s the way he says it. “You’re pathetic.”

He spits them at you. There’s venom lacing his tone like he’s seen into you and knows there’s nothing in you to offer. For the first time in a long time, you feel seen and you hate it. Because he’s looking past the sarcasm and the faux confidence you carry yourself with. 

He sees the empty husk of a woman you truly are and he’s forcing you to face it with him. It causes you physical pain, to know that everything you’ve ever feared about yourself is true. You don’t have anything to say to him, you can’t. 

Your lips tremble and you feel so fucking small. You can hear your parent's voices in your head, screaming at you and wishing you were never born. They’d rather have a stillborn than a fucked up mutant for a daughter. You see the way even other kids at the school would hide from you. You were made wrong, even as a mutant you were never truly accepted. 

Logan’s face drops ever so slightly at the prolonged silence in the car. Even Wade isn’t speaking, he’s just staring at you both. “I,” he starts, but Wade cuts him off. 

“I’m gonna hurt you now.” Wade’s never been one to let people run over you, even when you might just let yourself fall into the background. You shouldn’t be surprised when he draws a knife and stabs it into Logan’s throat. 

But the arterial spray that follows catches you off guard and suddenly your tears are dried. Instead, you’re throwing open the car door and diving out before one of them crushes you. You make it out of the car just in time, Logan having thrown Wade right where you had been sitting. 

Music starts up in the car as a result of their fighting. Divorced dad rock and the sounds of their, borderline, sexual grunting are your soundtrack for the rest of the night. You curl up at the base of a tree, waiting for them to be done with each other. 

Logan’s words continue to echo through your head. And the longer you linger on what he said the angrier you get. Not necessarily at him, but at yourself. You’ve let yourself linger in self-pity and wallow in regret for so long. 

You look in the mirror and you no longer recognize yourself. He’s right, as much as you hate to admit it, you’re a fucking joke. You toss your head back, slamming it against the trunk of the tree hard enough for it to hurt. 

There’s this manic, cloying feeling tugging at your chest. It’s like someone’s sitting on your ribs, crushing you until you can’t breathe anymore. You keep throwing your head back, letting the pain distract you until you feel warm blood leaking down the back of your scalp. 

“Shit,” you hiss, hand coming up to cradle the back of your skull. You wince when you feel the split in your skin. The blood leaks over the tips of your fingers, running through the cracks of your palm. 

You force yourself to relax, to move your head away from the tree. As you go to stand up, possibly to get Wade and Logan to quit their fighting, you notice something odd. The air around you is still, you can no longer hear them grunting or groaning as they rock the Honda. 

Leaves are suspended in the air. They’re not trembling from the breeze, they’re completely frozen. You take a step forward and gasp when you hit something solid. The air in front of you has solidified somehow. 

The realization dawns on you slowly but surely. This is you, you’ve done this. Manipulated everything around you on an atomic level. You’ve turned something you shouldn’t be able to feel into something you can touch. Frozen the world around you. Whatever Cassandra had done inside your head, it had knocked something loose. 

You haven’t had this wide a range of control for years. Any attempt to do something like this has been met with nosebleeds and long periods of blacking out. Elation fills you, the hurt from earlier is nearly gone. 

You glance through the wall of air and try to see if you can still see the Odyssey. To your horror, it’s gone. You wave your hands and the air returns to normal. The leaves drift back to the forest floor and you run back to where you’d left the two men. 

There are tire tracks dug deep into the mud. You know Wade wouldn’t willingly leave you behind, not here. You don’t know if Logan’s just kidnapped him or if someone else has. Whoever was driving was clearly in a rush to get out of here. 

You must have missed it all while you were having your meltdown. “Fuck,” you shout, your voice echoing into the branches above. You take in a deep breath and start walking. Hopefully, you can catch up to them before whoever has them does serious damage. 

You make it to a weird cave/hideout area. The Odyssey is parked outside and when you peek through the broken windows you find the interior completely destroyed. There’s blood soaking through every surface, anything and everything has been smashed and bent the wrong way. 

You don’t even know if this is from Wade and Logan or whoever had snatched them. Shaking your head you back up and slink towards the entrance of the den. You can hear shouting inside, it sounds like Wade, but you can’t make out what he’s saying. 

You haven’t seen action for a long time. At least not any that you could actually contribute to. It feels a bit like riding a bike. You’d practiced on your way here, making things around you float or eradicating a few trees into nothing but dust in the wind. But this is different. 

Your friend (and Logan) are inside, possibly being tortured. Maybe even dead. Though, you seriously doubt the universe is going to be that nice to you. You let the energy build in your arms, it’s like a warm tingling feeling. It shoots down to the palms of your hands until you feel static in the air. 

You take a step inside and spot three people. Each of them is decked out in weapons. One of them turns and spots you. “Who is-” 

You don’t let him finish, throwing your hands out and slamming them all into the wall so hard the whole interior shakes. Dirt rains down from the ceilings while their faces contort in pain. You run inside, spotting Logan and Wade. 

You shoot Wade a big grin but he throws his hands up and shouts, “Read the fucking room!” Your brows furrow and he points emphatically at the people you’re holding, “Good guys!”

“Oh shit,” you release them immediately, a guilty look on your face. “I am so sorry.” Logan cackles in the back, doubled over laughing while the three people in front of you brush themselves off. 

You don’t want to be out here with him, but it’s better than being in that cave with the others. Laura walks past you, sending you an uneasy smile. You’d noticed her sitting beside Logan and decided they probably needed a few moments to themselves. 

They were finished now, though, and he had the only bottle of liquor left in the cave with him. You trudge over to him, leaves crunching under your boots. Elektra, after that horrific introduction, had given you a uniform a different Flux had left behind. 

She was long gone, killed by Cassandra years ago, but she’d conveniently been your exact size. The uniform is nearly identical to the one you have buried under your bed. Black leather with a dark purple X going across your chest and matching purple seams. You’d never wanted something ridiculously flashy. Just something that people would see and associate with the X-Men. 

Because that’s all you’d ever wanted to be; a hero. It feels like a pipe dream now. If your pajamas weren’t so destroyed you would have just stayed in them. You don’t feel like you deserve this uniform, not when the woman who’d worn it before you had actually been a hero in her timeline. 

“Don’t want company,” Logan snarks, without even looking back to see who’s coming up to him.

You take a seat on the lawn chair closest to him and snatch the bottle of whiskey from his hands. “Good,” you tilt your head back, downing as much as possible. It burns the whole way and you revel in the slight tickle in the back of your throat. 

“Alright,” Logan mutters. He gently takes the bottle back from you, giving you an aggrieved look when he sees just how much you’ve stolen. He looks back into the fire and sighs, “Look, I’m not interested in hearing about your sob story or why you’re suddenly drinking all my liquor-”

“Gambit’s liquor,” you interrupt, not bothering to look at him. “And I’m not looking to dump my sob story on your lap. I just want to sit in silence and that’s impossible because Wade hasn’t stopped running his mouth since we got here.”

He looks a little surprised by the brusque way you dismiss him, “Alright,” he mutters. He takes another swig from the bottle and you both stare silently into the fire. It’s like that for a while, you don’t bother keeping track of time. 

All you hear is the crackling of the flames. All you can feel is the way your eyes burn from staring into the fire and watching sparks pop off the logs for too long. The breeze rustles the trees, makes the leaves shake free and dance around the logs of the fire. 

He breaks the silence first, to your chagrin. “About what I said,” he clears his throat uncomfortably, still refusing to look at you, “back in the car.”

“Don’t,” you snap, voice low. “Just,” you let out a long breath and shake your head. You finally look over and meet his eyes. He does actually look sorry, but you don’t want to hear it. “Just don’t, I deserved it all right.”

“No, no you didn’t.” You open your mouth to argue but he gives you a firm look that has your jaw snapping shut. “I was wrong, I don’t know you. And if my Flux had ever heard me talking to you like that she would have melted my fucking spine.” He laughs a little and you feel your lips twitch up slightly. It’s the first time you’ve seen him look anything but angry. 

Curiosity loosens your tongue and knocks you out of the dazed stupor you’ve been in. “What was she like?” You ask, tone earnest. “Your Flux, I mean, you make her sound so amazing. I just can’t,” you trail off, but the look on his face tells you he understands your unspoken words. I just can’t see myself as a real hero. 

He groans and leans back on the log he’s resting on. He stretches his legs out in front of him, the liquor bottle placed on the forest floor. You’re surprised, you figured the thing was glued to his hand. 

“Well,” he reaches up and scratches at the scruff of his chin, a wry grin on his face. “She was always giving me shit, never let me get away with anything.” You unconsciously lean forward, drawn into the endearing way he begins to describe this other version of you. 

It’s not ridiculous to assume this variant meant something to him. He’s got a shine to his eye that you haven’t seen in the whole time you’ve been together. His gaze has been empty, closed off to anything and everything. But now, his eyes are crinkling at the corners, there’s an easy smile on his face that you can’t miss. 

“Ah, she was fucking feisty. And strong, she was so strong. She was always a better hero than I was. She lived for that shit,” he trails off and shakes his head. You can see you’re losing him and you don’t want this to end. You’re in your own little bubble right now, getting to pretend there’s a version of you out there somewhere that actually lived up to her potential. 

“Her powers,” you blurt out, desperate for something to stop him from retreating back into his mind. “Did she have, um, good control over them?”

Logan nods, eyes darting down to the bottle of whiskey before flickering back up to meet your gaze again. “Yeah, Charles trained her, she was right up there with Jean. She could have,” he stops and suddenly you feel guilty for making him talk about this. You can see the tears in the corner of his eyes, the way the whites of them go red. “She could have been great.”

“I’m sorry,” you whisper, “I didn’t mean to pry.” But you did. You were being selfish and forcing him to talk about it even though you knew it would hurt him. 

“Look, kid, she would have liked you. I’ll tell you that much,” he says reluctantly. Like the words hurt to force out. You suppose he isn’t used to being genuine with anyone. 

You shake your head and look down at your hands. “I appreciate the thought, but I doubt it.”

Logan grabs the bottle again, gulping it down like it's water. His words have a slight slur to them as he speaks again. “I think I would know, bub. ‘Sides, you made it into the X-Men, tells me what I need to know.”

You scoff and fix him with a sardonic look, he raises his brows in question and you roll your eyes. “They’ll take fucking anybody. And I still wasn’t good enough for them.”

Logan shakes his head and frowns. “If what I saw in there,” he points back to the den and you feel your cheeks warm as you remember what you’d done, “is any indication, then I’m sure you were plenty good.”

You lean towards him, elbows braced on your knees. He follows suit, leaning so close you almost want to back up. The proximity flusters you slightly but you shake the feeling off. “You don’t even know me and the first real thing you said to me was that I’d be more useful as fertilizer.”

He sighs, face screwing up at your harsh words. He runs a hand over his cheeks and groans, “I didn’t mean it like that.”

You lean back in your chair and idly twirl your hand through the air. The leaves around you lift up and flutter through the air above your head. Logan watches and you turn back to him, waiting until his eyes meet yours to speak again. “Yes, you did. And you were right. I’m fucking useless, powers or not.” The leaves drop, a few fluttering into the fire. “We’re irrelevant, Wolverine, two washed-up X-Men who never looked good in the uniform.”

There’s a twinge of hurt on his face but you can’t make yourself feel bad about it. Since he’s such a fan of brutal truth, you’re sure he can handle it. 

You watch as the leaves curl up at the corners, the fire burning them straight through the middle. You get to your feet and move past him. You’re nearly back to the den when he calls, “The suit looks right on you,” over his shoulder.

You pause at the threshold of the door. He’s already drinking again, staring into the fire and watching it burn. You take a few steps towards him, staring at his broad back. “What happened to her, your me?”

Logan looks down at his hands, his ring finger specifically. You wonder at the significance of the movement, what exactly you’d meant to him. “She married me,” he mutters, voice cold and closed off again. 

“Goodnight, Logan,” you whisper, finally walking inside the den. 

You miss the small goodnight he sends back to you, finally turning around only to watch you leave. 

There had been a very clear plan set in place. Get Juggernaut’s helmet, put it on Cassandra, and then kill that psychotic bitch. Which is why you’re so confused when you’re standing knee-deep in guts and watching Logan and Wade leap through a portal above you. 

You don’t have time to feel angry or even hurt that they left without you. Laura is grabbing your arm and you’re both running for your life, trying to escape Alioth again. You run into Cassandra’s lair ducking into one of the rooms and dragging Laura with you. 

You’re both holding your breaths and praying that he’s sated by the others still outside. After a few minutes, the cracks of thunder stop and you risk peeking your head outside. The clouds have retreated back to their usual spot in the middle of the void. 

You take in the carnage of Cassandra’s evil lair. Most everybody is dead. You only have to skirt around a few people to get back to the Odyssey. 

You throw yourself in the driver’s seat and sink back against the bloodstained cushions. You let out a relieved breath and look at Laura, “What do you do to entertain yourself around here?”

You acclimated to the idea of being stuck in the void pretty quickly. There wasn’t exactly a lot waiting for you back home. Besides, Laura was nice enough. You had food, beer, and company. You didn’t really need much else. 

You’re pretty sure if you linger too long on the thought that Wade left you behind you’ll fall into a depression that you’re never going to be able to claw your way out of. So, you forced a smile on your face and played cards. Nothing else to do but wait to die of old age or for Alioth to kill you. 

Of course, your plans had to be ruined. There was an odd rush of air against your back and then a slight whoosh. Laura glanced over your shoulders and her brows furrowed, you turned around to find three armored men waiting behind you. 

“Flux,” the man glanced from you to Laura, “X-23?”

“Laura,” you both correct at the same time. 

The man gives an aggrieved sigh and holds his arm out, “Come with me, please.”

You stand up, energy tingling in the palms of your hands while you regard them suspiciously. Laura comes up behind you, claws out and glaring at them. “Why should we?” You demand. 

Barely a second later you hear the most insufferable voice in the world. “Hiya, peanut!” 

“Wade,” you hiss. You follow the armored men through an oddly shaped portal and find Wade standing beside a shirtless Logan, smiling proudly at you. “You fucking left me,” you hold up your hands and his eyes widen.��

His hands quickly come up, trying to assuage you, “Hold on now-”

You throw him back, his body hurtling into a nearby building and caving in the wall. Logan watches it happen with a small smile, “Been wanting to do that for a while.” 

Once Wade had recovered he filled you in on everything that happened. TVA did a general clean up and then you were standing in front of your apartment door, keys in hand like nothing had happened. 

It was so bizarre, going from a mission to save your timeline and then you’re expected to just go about your life. You stay standing in that hallway for you don’t know how long before you hear someone behind you. 

You jump and drop your keys when Logan clears his throat. “Shit,” you hiss, whirling around and glaring at him while your heart races. He chuckles and bends over to grab your keys for you. 

“Sorry,” he mutters. This is the most relaxed you’ve ever seen him, covered in blood and in a borrowed shirt. “Uh, Wade doesn’t have enough room at his place. Told me I should come over here.”

You look over his shoulder and see Wade peeking his head out of his doorway. He catches your eye, sending you a thumbs up. You almost smile but then he makes a phallic gesture with his hands, pointing at Logan and humping the air. You glare at him and he quickly backs into his apartment, but not before sending you one last encouraging shit-eating grin. 

You look back at Logan and he’s waiting expectantly for your answer. “Yeah,” you take your keys from him and unlock the door. “I’ve got a spare room but there’s no bed in it right now.” Your eyes widen when you see the mess that is your apartment. 

You quickly rush through, picking up empty take-out boxes and dirty laundry and shoving them into your room. He’s smiling at you when you come back and it's slightly off-putting. “Um,” you gesture towards the couch awkwardly. “You can take the sofa tonight and we’ll look at setting you up with something more permanent tomorrow.”

“Thanks,” he hovers by the armrest and you engage in the longest stare-off of your life. Neither of you says anything for a few suffocating moments before he gestures at himself. “Shower?”

“Oh,” you snap out of your stupor and nod your head. “Yeah, right, of course.” You show him down the hall, “Here. I’ll go get you a towel.”

You rush towards your linen closet, leaving him behind in your bathroom. You grab a few clean towels and then figure he might want some clothes as well. You grab some pajamas that Wade’s left over when he’s crashed before. They’ll probably be a bit tighter on Logan, but you wouldn’t mind seeing that. 

You walk back to the bathroom and the thought of knocking doesn’t even run through your head. It should, honestly, but you’re already so thrown off by him even being here. You walk in and immediately gasp and drop the towels. 

“Oh, I'm sorry. I’m so sorry.” He’s standing naked before you. Clothes discarded on the floor behind him. Everything on perfect display. Your eyes land on his abs, noticing a few prominent veins leading down-

You cover your face and turn around. “Sorry,” you mutter again. God, you’re such an idiot. You still haven’t even left. You’d just been shamelessly ogling the man naked and you don’t even have the decency to walk out. 

You really can’t help it though. It’s been such a clusterfuck, the last 72 hours. Your brain is fried and Wade’s little show hasn’t helped you at all.  

You hear Logan laugh behind you. “It’s alright,” he mutters. Something warm ghosts across your arm and you jump slightly. His hand firmly grasps your bicep, gently tugging your palms away from your face. 

You risk a glance over your shoulder and nearly gasp at how close he’s gotten. He's towering over you, something in his face you can’t place. “It’s alright,” he whispers again and you find yourself nodding without really thinking. 

He’s got both hands on your arms now, trailing up and down. The touch is so featherlight you can barely feel it at all. You don’t even realize how he’s gently coaxing you closer until you trip on the towels at your feet. 

You startle, looking down at them and moving to kick them aside. But he stops you, his finger nudging your chip up so you’ll look at him again. There is such blatant want painted across his face that it makes your heart skip a beat. Your breath catches in your throat when he wraps an arm around your waist and drags you closer. 

You can feel all of him. You can feel just how much he wants you. It catches you off guard, this sudden display of attraction. You don’t know where it’s coming from, what’s brought it on. But you can’t find it in yourself to care. You’ve been so lonely for so long. You just want to bask in the fact that he looks absolutely starved for you. 

No man has ever looked at you with such heartbreakingly yearning eyes - like he’s been looking for you his whole life. He dips down, lips ghosting gently over yours. Your breaths mingle together, you can nearly taste him. 

It’s unclear which one of you moves first, who pushes closer to the other. But it doesn’t matter because the second you put real pressure behind the kiss he’s all over you. One of his hands drifts down to your ass, squeezing the flesh there and dragging you closer, grinding his hips into yours. 

You moan at the feeling, your arms wrap around his neck and you press yourself even closer. He groans against your lips at the first swipe of your tongue. You part with a gasp when he picks you up, practically tossing you onto your sink. Your legs spread instinctually, making room for him as he slots himself between them. 

It’s odd, feeling so vulnerable even when he’s the one who's completely naked. It still feels like he’s holding all the power. 

His lips are moving frantically over yours like he’s terrified you’re going to disappear the second he lets go. You can taste something desperate on his tongue. Something deeply rooted inside him that you can’t identify. 

One of your hands drifts from his neck, trailing over the muscles of his chest. Your fingers carve a path down his abs, relishing in how muscular he feels under your palm. Your hand reaches his pelvis, nearly wrapped around him when he jumps back. 

He grabs your wrist in a grip so tight you know there’s going to be a bruise. A pained gasp slips out and he releases you immediately. “I’m sorry,” he mutters. “Sorry, I can’t.” He won’t look at you now, backing up towards the shower and shaking his head. “This was a bad idea, I can’t do this.”

You shake your head, slipping off the sink and hiding your bruised wrist behind your back. “No, sorry, I shouldn’t have moved so fast.”

You feel too ashamed to meet his eye. He kissed you but you feel like you’ve forced yourself on him somehow. It’s a nauseating feeling and you want nothing more than to run back to your room and hide. 

He takes a step towards you, something pained on his face. “Kid-”

You just shake your head, step out of the bathroom, and grab the handle of the door. “Sorry,” you whisper again, closing the door behind you. You lean against the cool wood, trying to catch your breath. 

Your hand drifts up to your lips, still tingling from how desperately he’d kissed you. It doesn’t make any sense. He came on to you, he threw you up on the sink, and made out with you more passionately than any man ever has before. So why are you the one who feels dirty?

You rush down the hall and into your room, slamming the door behind you. You dive under your covers, closing your eyes even though you know you won’t sleep. No, your shoulders are tensed up to your ears and your bones are vibrating with an energy you need to release. 

You’re completely tuned into the other person lurking in your apartment. You can hear as he starts the shower, how he talks quietly to himself sometimes. Then when he gets out you can perfectly picture what he looks like while he’s getting dressed and it only makes you feel worse. 

You listen as he leaves the bathroom and pauses in the hall. You can see it in your mind’s eye, how he stares at your door. He walks towards it and lingers for a minute before cussing quietly and heading back into the living room. 

You suddenly remember that you didn’t lay sheets out on the couch for him. You feel guilty, but there’s not one part of you that will be dragged from this bed and face him. Not now, at least. 

He’s up for a little while longer, getting water. Turning the TV on and off. Rooting through your cabinets looking for booze you know you don’t have. Finally, he settles on the couch. You’re awake for another hour, unable to relax until you’re completely sure he’s asleep. Even as you drift off and your body finally relaxes your mind doesn’t. You keep seeing that stricken look on his face and it makes you sick to your stomach. 

It’s the smell of pancakes that wakes you up. You’re not sure when you finally managed to pass out last night but you know it was late. Which is why you’re so pissed off that you’re being forced to get up at seven in the morning. 

You’re used to being able to sleep in a lot later than that. You’re already in a pissy mood from last night and it only gets worse as you trudge around your room getting ready. You’ve never been more thankful to have snagged one of the rare two-bathroom apartments in the building.

You don’t want to have to share a bathroom with Logan. You don’t even want to use the other one after what happened last night. It’s too embarrassing and painful to think about. The emotional whiplash of feeling so desired and then absolutely hideous is making your head spin. 

You’re sure it was all just a problem on his end, but it really doesn’t make you feel any better. When you can’t stall any longer, and you know that Logan has heard you get up, you slip quietly out of your room. 

The curtains in your living room are open and he’s in the kitchen fucking around with your stove. The news is playing quietly on the TV and you’re astounded about how little he’s done and how much more homely your apartment feels. 

It’s never really been home to you. Not after you were booted from the X-Men. But he’s somehow made it ten times cozier than it ever has been. You almost resent him a little for it. 

“Morning,” he grumbles from the kitchen. “Coffee,” he motions behind him and you see a steaming cup already waiting for you. You silently slip behind him, grabbing the creamer from the fridge and pouring it until you’re sure it’s sweet enough to not actually taste the coffee. 

“Thanks,” you mutter, moving to sit at the table. You keep your eyes trained on the TV, pretending to pay attention to the news so you don’t have to look at him. He bores his eyes into the side of your head until you feel like you’re going to have holes in your temple. 

When you can’t take it anymore you finally look over at him. He doesn’t smile, his face barely even twitches, he just looks back to his pan and continues scrambling some eggs. “Didn’t know you cooked,” you offer up weakly, already growing anxious from the silence. 

It feels wrong, to be walking on eggshells in your own apartment. He grunts and shrugs, “Not really cooking. You had the mix in your pantry,” he tells you brusquely. His tone borders on rude and you scoff. 

The audacity of this man to have an attitude with you in your apartment. He was the one who threw a hissy fit last night. You roll your eyes and go back to the news, all it tells you is that the world is just as depressing as the inside of your apartment is right now. 

You notice out of the corner of your eye the way his shoulders slump forward. He leans against the oven, seeming not to care if he burns himself. You suppose it doesn’t matter, he’d just heal. “Sorry,” he mutters. It sounds like it pains him to say the words. 

“Whatever,” you mumble under your breath. You take a long sip of your coffee, slurping a little so you have something to fill the atmosphere. 

He puts some food on a plate and brings it over to the table for you. You usually don’t eat breakfast, preferring to just skip the meal and eat a bigger lunch. But it feels too bitchy to say that to him, so you just accept the food with a strained smile. “Thanks.”

He sits across from you, glaring down at your table like it insulted him. You drag your fork against the plate, letting the scrape of metal against porcelain drown out your worries. Finally, he looks at you. “Look, about last night.”

You tense up. You want to interrupt him, to stop him from explaining. You know it’s just going to hurt your feelings, whatever he says. Whether he tells you it was a mistake or he just realized he’s not attracted to you, either way, you’re fucked. But, it’s also kept you up all night so you just shut your mouth and let him speak. 

You keep your gaze trained on your plate, unable to fully face him. He lets out a long sigh and clenches his fork so tight you hear the metal bend. He drops it to the table and clenches and unclenches his fists a few times. 

“I just couldn’t kiss you, not when I wasn’t doing it for the right reasons.”

Your brows furrow in confusion and you finally look up at him. “What?” You demand, disbelief coloring your voice. 

His eyes are boring into yours, an intensity behind the stare that leaves you feeling a little shaken. “You look like her,” he whispers, and the grief is so thick in his voice it makes your throat tighten. He pauses briefly before continuing. “There are,” he clears his throat like he’s trying not to cry. It makes you lean back in your chair, arms crossed over your stomach uncomfortably. 

“There are a few differences, obviously. You’re not a carbon copy. But your mannerisms, your attitudes, you’re so similar. And I,” he shakes his head and gives you one of the most genuinely apologetic looks you’ve ever received. You can tell he really does feel guilty for projecting on you but it doesn’t make you feel any less uncomfortable. “And I just wasn’t doing that for the right reasons. I was pretending you were her and that’s just not fair to you.”

You lean your elbows on the table, head falling into your hands. You let out a rough sigh and groan in irritation. You knew the reason would hurt but you didn’t think it would be this bad. You feel gross, icky under your skin knowing that he was pretending you were another version of yourself. The version of yourself you’ve always wanted to be; the hero. 

But you also feel such a deep sadness and sympathy for him. He’d briefly mentioned that he was married to this other you. You can’t even begin to imagine what it would feel like, to see your dead wife’s face staring at you and she doesn’t even know you. 

“I,” you don’t even know where to begin. You struggle to say anything for a minute and you both just stew in the tense silence. You take in a deep breath and look up at him. You do what you always do, forcing a smile and shrugging it off. “I appreciate the honesty, really.” You stand up, bringing your still-full plate into the kitchen and busying yourself with cleaning up. 

“Clearly,” you snap, your voice crueler than it should be, “It was a mistake. We’ll just have to make sure it doesn’t happen again, right?”

Logan sits silently at the table. He looks like there’s more he wants to say but you don’t give him the chance. You can’t take it. You finally thought someone had wanted you for you, flaws and all. You’re a fucking idiot, he barely even knows you. Whatever connection you thought was there was just brought about by your own loneliness. 

“I gotta get ready for work,” you tell his back because he isn’t looking at you now. 

He nods, scraping his fork across the plate as he aggressively cuts into his food. “Right.” You wait for him to say anything else but he doesn’t. 

You walk past him and head back to your room. You don’t even have a job, you don’t have to work. But you still grab your purse and head out of the apartment. Pretending you do just so you don’t have to look at him anymore. 

You really should have let him finish, though. You should have let him keep talking to you. Let him explain how as much as he sees her in you, that’s not why he wants you. He wants you for you. Because as similar as you can be, you’re still a completely different person from who his late wife was. You’re someone strong and incredible and he genuinely wants you. But he can never really let himself be happy. 

It takes a few days for you both to ease up around the other. The incident in the bathroom is never brought up again. You take him shopping for clothes after a few days. It feels wrong to keep giving him Wade’s hand-me-downs. You would have had your friend take him, but you don’t trust Wade’s sense of fashion at all. 

After that and getting lunch together while you were out shopping things got a little easier. You bought him a bed for the spare room because you felt guilty seeing him all cramped up on your tiny couch. 

You don’t initiate any physical contact with each other. The closest you’d gotten was your hands brushing when you both reached for some popcorn at the same time on movie night. But you hadn’t really minded that bad. 

Eventually, he starts to feel like a real roommate and a friend. He lets little pieces of himself slip out. Slowly opens up about his past. You haven’t made any existential discoveries of course. But he tells you stories of what his X-Men were like. 

You try not to dance around the topic of his wife, you don’t want him to think you’re avoiding asking about her. But you also don’t want him to think you’re obsessed with discussing her. 

He’s right, you two weren’t carbon copies of each other at all. You might share a few things in common but the more both you and Logan learn about each other, the more clear it is how different you both are from your variants. 

Sometimes you think he looks at you like he’s really seeing you, not her. But you can never be sure and you don’t want to put much strength behind the thought in case you’re wrong. You hate the idea that when you’re thinking of nothing but him, he’s just seeing her reflection on your face. 

There’s nothing you can do about it but it doesn’t stop the hurt. 

Tonight, at Wade’s suggestion, you’re both up on the roof waiting for a meteor shower that you’re ninety percent sure is never going to happen. You’re also one hundred percent sure that Wade just tricked you out of your apartment so he could have sex in it. He and Vanessa don’t really get a lot of time alone with Blind Al around. You’re already mentally preparing for the absolute fuck storm you’re going to have to clean up after.  

There’s a light nudge on your shoulder and you glance over at Logan. He’s got the whiskey bottle outstretched towards you and you take it from him with a smile. One thing about being his roommate, your alcohol tolerance has skyrocketed. His liver might regenerate, but you’re pretty sure if you keep going down this route yours will give out in a few months. 

“Think this is actually going to happen?” You ask, pointing up toward the clear night sky. 

Logan chuckles and shakes his head. He stretches out in your flimsy lawn chair and you try not to let your gaze be drawn to the sliver of skin peeking out from his shirt. “Probably not, but I don’t mind being out here.”

There’s an unspoken, with you, that makes you smile. You meet his gaze, his eyes soft as he watches you. “Me either.” You lean back in your chair, pulling your legs up onto the seat and huddling under your blanket. “It’s peaceful.”

You drink together in silence for a little while longer. Then you have to tap out, you don’t want your brain getting too foggy. Tonight is nice, you want to remember it tomorrow. To your surprise, he caps the bottle and places it to the side. You don’t mention it but you do feel like you’ve noticed he’s been drinking a little less. The dark circles under his eyes seem to be easing away ever so slightly. 

He looks over at you with an odd light in his eyes. You shift uncomfortably under his stare when it lasts a little longer than it usually does. You chuckle awkwardly, “Do I have something on my face?”

There’s a soft uptick to his lips as he shakes his head. “No,” he mutters, looking back out at the night. “You mind if I ask you something?”

Ominous, but whatever. “Sure.”

He still doesn’t look at you and you worry slightly about whatever it is he’s going to ask. He doesn’t ease you into it all, “Wade said your brain was broken?” A laugh springs out of your throat from how brusque that was. He rolls his eyes. “Fuckin’ idiot mentioned it in the void, been wonderin’ about it.”

“It’s fine,” you tell him. You’re relaxed enough that you don’t mind answering. You don’t want to pop the soft bubble you’ve managed to create around each other. “Here,” you hold your hand out for the whiskey bottle. He gives you an apprehensive look before handing it over. 

You unscrew the cap, “This,” you say and point your hand at the glass. The liquid inside lifts into the air and you freeze it before dropping it back into the bottle with a splash, a simple little party trick. “This used to be enough to put me in a coma for two days. That’s what he meant. Something happened to me and I just couldn’t do it anymore.”

Logan’s eyes widen and he shakes his head in disbelief. You laugh a little, “I assume your wife never had problems like that?”

There’s always a fond smile when you mention his wife. Whether the memory is bittersweet or not. “She wasn’t perfect, much as I thought so. When she used her powers too much she,” he trails off and looks down at the floor. You frown, ducking your head down so you can catch his gaze. 

“You don’t have to talk if you don’t want to,” you promise quietly.

But he shakes his head and gives you a weak, tight-lipped smile. “No, I want to. And I don’t want you to think you’re the only Flux who struggled. When she used her powers too much she would deteriorate. Parts of her would just disappear, I don’t even know how to describe it. They were destroying her from the inside out.”

You let out a low whistle, eyes widening slightly. “Well, maybe I didn't get the short end of the stick after all.” It’s quiet and for a moment you worry your humor was ill-timed. 

But he lets out a rough laugh, “No, I guess not.” He takes in a deep breath before looking back up at you. There’s no distant sadness in his eyes like there usually is when you bring her up. It seems to only be a familiar ache now, rather than something fresh and bleeding. “But what happened to you? Why couldn’t you use your powers?”

“Oh,” you look down at your lap, picking at the strings of your pants. It would be unfair to have him talk about his wife and then wimp out when it was your turn. 

“Um, There was this mission. A bunch of kids, mutants, were being held in this warehouse. It was actually pretty normal, just go in, retrieve them, and bring them back to safety. I must have done a dozen of these before, but, I don’t know. Something was this different this time around.”

You can still hear them screaming. In your mind, you hear the way they cried for help. And you see the look on your faces when they realize you can’t save them every time you go to sleep. 

You suck in a sharp breath and almost jump when his hand lands on yours. It’s gentle, he’s barely even touching you and he’s not even acknowledging what he’s doing. But you take his hand in yours and squeeze, it’s nice, grounding. 

“Long story short, they were heavily guarded and I was pretty drained from fighting off the guards. My powers were practically gone by the time we could even get to the kids. And, I don’t know, something must have gotten knocked over or hit the wrong way because smoke was filling the place and everything was on fire. I couldn’t see anything, couldn’t breathe, and the kids were blocked off. There was nothing we could do to get to them. Everyone kept screaming at me, telling me to just use my abilities and get them out of there. I couldn’t,” your voice gets thick and you look anywhere but at him. “I,” your mouth hangs open and you don’t know what you could possibly say. 

There’s no excuse for what happened. “I just couldn’t,” you whisper. You sniffle and your eyes flutter rapidly, trying to stop any tears from coming. “Hadn’t been able to use my powers since then. Trauma block or something, I guess,” you dismiss yourself flippantly and shrug. 

Logan just squeezes your hand again. He doesn’t seem to know what to say to comfort you and you’re honestly grateful for the silence. You get so sick of people telling you there was nothing you could have done. Or that the others should have helped you. Because that’s not a fucking excuse. There’s no fixing what happened, no giving those parents their children back. You fucked up and you don’t appreciate people giving you cop-outs. 

You keep your gaze trained steadily on the ground, eyes going blurry while you try to slip into the back of your mind. You don’t get the chance, though. Logan is kneeling in front of you, hands slipping up your arms to cup your face. 

He forces you to look at him, to stay present in the moment with him. “You fucked up,” he tells you. It's so shocking that you can’t help but let out a loud wet laugh. You sniffle and he grins, wiping the tears out from under your eyes. His grip on your cheeks tightens and he makes sure you’re listening as he speaks, “You fucked up, kid. But that doesn’t mean you didn’t try your fucking hardest. And it doesn’t erase all the people you did help.”

Your eyes search him, trying to find any kernel of untruth. Trying to prove to yourself that this isn’t real. That he isn’t real. You don’t deserve this moment of such unwavering trust and faith. This is meant for someone else, for someone who deserves good things in life. 

You’ve never truly believed you deserved happiness or peace like this. But right now you don’t care because he is saying everything you’ve ever wanted to hear. And he actually means it. 

Your hand drifts up, covering his and tilting your head to press a gentle kiss to his palm. It’s tentative, a test, a way to give him an out if doesn’t want this. His grip on you tightens for half a second before he shoots forward and claims your lips with his own. 

It escalates quickly. You practically melt off your chair, straddling his lap while he leans back on the ground. Your hands tug at his hair while he moves desperately over your body. He can’t seem to decide what he wants to do, where he wants to touch you. 

You love how fully his hands engulf you, the tight way they cradle you to his chest. You’ve never felt more secure in someone’s arms than you do right now. He’s got you, and he wants you. For you this time, you can tell. You can tell from the way he holds you that this isn’t a desperation born from grief. It’s something else, something you’re not ready to identify yet. 

His tongue laves across the seam of your lips, silently asking permission. You smile against the kiss, parting your lips and deepening it. He licks into you, tasting you with a low grunt in the back of his throat. You feel your hips start to move of their own volition. Gently grinding down against his lap. You moan when you feel just how bad he wants you. 

You lean back, parting from the kiss and pressing a finger to his chest to keep from following. You chuckle at his eagerness, grinding your hips down again and watching the way he thrusts up to meet your movement. “Didn’t know I was such a good kisser,” you tease. 

But he doesn’t return the joke or play along. His face falls slightly and he pulls further away from you, the look on his face distant. “What?” You whisper. “Do I have bad breath?” You joke, trying to keep the mood light. 

He shakes his head and runs a tired hand over his face. “No,” he mutters. He repeats the word more firmly and finally meets your gaze. “I think I need to take this slow, just because of…”

He trails off but you know what he means. His wife. You don’t know if he’s still projecting her onto you, you felt so sure he wasn’t earlier. But if every time you kiss he’s gonna pull back you’re not sure that you can do this. “Of course,” you mutter with a bite to your voice. It’s hard not to feel a little rejected every time he acts like this. 

You move to get off his lap but his hands clamp down on your hips and he shakes his head again. “You don’t have to get up.”

You hesitate, thighs still hovering over his. You should get up and put as much space between you as possible. But he’s so warm and you want to be held for a little while more. You nod and he looks relieved. You lean back down, pressing your chest against his and letting your head rest in the crook of his neck. 

He wraps a heavy arm around your back, keeping you close while the other reaches up to stroke your hair. It makes you feel small, in a good way. Like you can just relax and he’ll take care of you. 

“Goddamn,” he laughs a little and you sit up. He nods to the sky above and you turn around, gasping. 

“Fuck,” you whisper, “he wasn’t lying.” For once, Wade was telling the truth. Above you, it looks like the sky is falling. Glittering stars dart across the sky, streaks of blue following behind them. You grin, “It’s so beautiful.”

Logan keeps his eyes on you and nods, “Yeah, it is.”

“Ah, look, my favorite fuck buddies.”

”Wade,” you greet tightly. You shove the bottle of wine you brought into his chest and he stumbles back. “Just let us in, you freak.”

He frowns, placing a hand over his heart. “You know, it really hurts when you talk like that. I think we all need to hold hands and have a good old-fashioned jerk circle.”

You roll your eyes and flick his thick forehead. “It’s share circle, dumbass.”

”Not the way I do it,” he moves to the side and lets you both in. “Well, mi casa es su casa, especially since Vanessa and I had rockin’ sex in your bed last week.”

He walks off before you can hit him or even begin to respond to that. “I fucking knew it,” you hiss, glaring at his stupid Hawaiian shirt while he mingles with the rest of the people at the party. 

Logan chuckles behind you, “How did you two ever become friends?”

You roll your eyes and turn to face him. “I moved in next door,” you respond dryly. “This was a nonconsensual friendship because god hates me, clearly.” You shrug your jacket off and he takes it from you, hanging it up on the hook by the door. He comes back, slinging an arm around your shoulder, and leading you towards the kitchen. 

You hear Wade laughing loudly in the background and he grunts, “I’m gonna need a drink for this,” he mutters. You nod your head in agreement. You don’t get very far, though, because without any warning Wade is in front of you. He’s got his ridiculous dog in his arms and shoves her in your face. You grimace and jump back. Logan abandons you and you narrow your eyes at his retreating back. Traitor

Wade says your name with disappointment. “You know, Mary Puppins is a part of my life now. As my best friend, you need to bond with her. I can’t have you two fighting like this.” He shoves the dog into your arms without any warning and you flinch away from her wandering tongue. 

“If this thing licks me, I’m putting her down,” you warn him gravely. 

He gasps and snatches her back. “You are no longer welcome in my home,” he tells you with a snotty huff. You roll your eyes and watch him go. When he’s out of sight your lips curl up in a grin and you glance at Logan. 

He’s by the sink, making himself a drink and taking a deep swig straight out of the bottle. You creep up behind him, wrapping your arms around his waist. He smiles, hand coming down to gently hold your arm. “What’re you doing?”

”Come with me,” you whisper. You take his hand and lead him through the apartment. You both skirt around the partygoers, giving them vague greetings and waving them off when they give you odd looks. 

Logan leans down, lips brushing across your ear as he whispers, “Where are we going?” Your knees nearly give out when you hear that low tone of voice of his. You just shake your head and lead him down the hall. You can sniff out Wade’s room from the permeating stench of his axe body spray. 

You throw the door open and drag Logan inside behind you. His nose wrinkles up at the stiff socks littering the floor and the smell. Other than that, it’s relatively clean. You actually thought this would look so much worse. 

“Now,” Logan demands, “are you gonna tell me what we’re doing?”

“Well,” you lock the door and turn around with a devious grin. “Seeing as Wade has ruined my favorite sheets, I feel like we need to get him back somehow.” You glance around the room, trying to figure out something of his you want to destroy. 

You don’t hear Logan moving towards you. You’re too busy rooting through Wade’s desk and trying to find something good to shred up.  All you’re seeing is increasingly more disturbing porno mags. He has got a serious problem with pegging. You briefly wonder if you should set up an intervention or something for him. 

You nearly yelp when Logan’s hands grip your shoulders, whipping you around to face him. “I’ve got an idea of what we can do.” That’s your only warning before his lips cover your own. You melt into him immediately, hands fisting his shirt and dragging him closer. He grins against your lips, lifting you and placing you on the edge of Wade’s desk. 

“Mm,” you moan but shove his chest back and shake your head. “Wait,” you hop off the desk and take a seat on Wade’s bed instead. “There’s no point in this if we’re not on the bed.”

Logan shakes his head with an amused huff. He walks towards you but instead of taking a seat on the bed next to you like you'd expected, he kneels before you. Your brows furrow together and you frown. “Wait, what’re you doing?”

He gives you a gentle smile, hands coming up to rub gently over your thighs. The warmth of his palms soothes you almost immediately. “You trust me?” He asks, voice a low rumble against your chest. 

“Yeah,” you whisper. He nods encouragingly and leans forward, kissing you gently. There’s nothing expectant in this kiss. He’s doing it just to be close to you. Then you feel his hands drifting higher, fingers running over the buttons of your jeans. Your lips part, ready to ask him a question. But he just takes the chance to dip his tongue into your mouth, eagerly tasting you. You moan into it, not protesting when he presses you back into the bed. 

His fingers dip under the waistband of your jeans. You lift your hips to help him tug them the rest of the way down until they’re dropping to the floor quietly. You have a million questions dancing on the tip of your tongue but you can’t find it in yourself to actually voice any of them. You don’t want to break the moment. This is the first time he’s seemed comfortable going further than kissing and some heavy petting. 

“Fuck,” he whispers. Your hips jolt as he runs a thumb over the wet spot on your panties. “All this just from kissing?” He asks, a teasing lilt to his tone. You feel your face flush, cheeks warming when you realize he’s never actually seen just how much he affects you. “Relax,” he tells you, squeezing your thighs once before slipping a few lithe fingers under the band of your panties. 

He tugs them down, but the second he sets eyes on you he gets too impatient to take them off the rest of the way. They dangle off one ankle while he lifts your thighs, setting them on his shoulder and dipping down to press a gentle kiss against you. You gasp at the contact, head tilting back while you instinctually grind your hips up against him. 

It’s been a long time since you’ve actually been with anyone and you already know you’re going to cum embarrassingly quick because he fucking devours you. You’ve had boyfriends who liked to eat you out before, but this is something completely different. 

He drags his tongue over you, sucking on your clit like it’s his only true joy in life. You can’t even make noises, your jaw hanging slack while you cant your hips higher. He groans when you grind against his face, shaking his head and flicking his nose across your bud. You nearly come from the sight of him smiling against your cunt alone. You feel it building slowly, and it’s like your powers are swelling up along with your release. 

Wade’s knicknacks are floating off the shelves, some of them rotating in the air, others fluctuating between liquid and solid forms. You can’t control yourself, you’re barely aware of the chaos happening in the room around you. You just feel a warmth at the tips of your toes, swelling over your body, making your skin feel too tight. There’s little to no warning when you cum. He dips his tongue inside you and you let out a long moan, drenching his face. 

The sheets are soaking wet underneath you and you know you’ve ruined his shirt. You’ve never come that hard before and you would reflect on that more if he wasn’t still fucking eating you out. You think your brain is going to melt out of your ears, you're so overwhelmed by all the different sensations.

He dips his tongue into you, dragging out your orgasm and drinking as much of you down as he can. Your hips keep twitching, you’d be thrashing out of his hands if it wasn’t for the near brushing grip he has on your hips. “Fuck fuck fuck,” you reach down, grabbing his hair at the roots and tugging. He groans at the feeling, barely leaning an inch back. “No more,” you whisper, chest heaving. 

He smiles, palms smoothing across the skin of your thighs, “You okay?” 

“Mhm,” you hum weakly. Your head falls back against the bed with a dull thunk and you struggle to catch your breath. “Holy shit, where did you learn to do that?” He doesn’t answer, just laughs. You jump slightly when he presses a tender kiss on your thigh, every part of you oversensitive. 

He moves slowly up your body, hands dragging your shirt up until he’s pulling it over your head. He cups your cheeks, letting you recover while he kisses your cheeks and face. You laugh slightly at the feeling of his beard tickling you. 

You pull back, meeting his gaze for a long drawn-out moment before you lean forward to finally kiss him back. You can feel yourself slowly coming back into your body. Your limbs tingle back to life while you lazily make out with him. 

His hands drift down your chest, squeezing your breasts. You laugh against his lips, arching into his touch. You reach back, unclipping your bra and throwing it off somewhere in the room. In the far reaches of your mind, you make a mental note to take that when you go. You don’t want to think about what Wade would do with it if he found it. 

Logan pulls back from you and your lips tip down at the serious look he wears. Your fingers trace the lines of his face and you tilt your head in question. “What’s wrong?” You whisper. You’re completely naked before him and he’s still clothed, you don’t want him to leave now. 

He can’t keep doing this to you. He can’t keep forcing you into these vulnerable positions and then leaving. There’s only so much rejection you can take before you start to resent him for it. 

He tilts his head down, gaze dragging across your body appreciatively. He’s looking at you like you’re art and it makes you feel like you should be in a museum somewhere. Finally, his hand drags down from your chest, wrapping around your waist and dragging you onto his lap. 

You brace your hands on his shoulders to steady yourself. He leans towards you, lips trailing lightly across your jaw. “You’re not her,” he whispers against your skin. Your mouth parts, a pained breath slipping through. You try to move back from him. You hadn’t expected something like that, not now, not when you thought you’d made so much progress together. 

To have you naked, vulnerable like this, and then say something like that to you. It was fucking despicable. You shove his shoulders back but he barely moves. You shift, trying to cover yourself and fighting off the urge to cry. Why won’t he let you go? Why does he keep doing this to you? 

He reaches out, snatching up your wrist before you can get far. “I don’t want you to be. I never wanted you to be her, I need you to know that.”

He tries to kiss you but you snatch his jaw in your hand before he can. You let your nails dig in until there’s red blooming under your fingertips. He hisses, but he’s not mad, you can feel how much he enjoys the little pinpricks of pain. 

“No more pulling away,” you warn. “I’m not playing this damn game with you anymore, Logan. You want me, then commit.” You release him with a shove and his pupils dilate with want. You appreciate the gentle way he’s been treating you, but you know you’re both holding back. 

He’s the first partner you’ve been with that can actually take what you give and vice versa. There’s something only mutants understand sometimes. You normally have to hold back, have to make sure you don’t scare a guy off by making the walls shake when you come. 

You push him down onto the bed. Hands sliding under the hem of his shirt and running over the grooves of his muscles. You haven’t had a chance to appreciate just how gorgeous his body is before, but nothing is holding you back now. 

You snap your fingers and the buttons rip open, he surges forward catching your lips with his while you both frantically push his shirt off. He throws it off to the side and his fingers fumble with his belt buckle while you trail kisses down his neck. You glance up at him for a second before biting down on a particularly sensitive spot. 

He groans, head rolling back while you grin against his skin. You make your way back to his lips. “Don’t hold back,” you tell him, trailing your hands down to his fists and running over the spots where the claws come out. 

“Sweetheart,” he starts tone apprehensive. You shake your head, shutting him up with a kiss. 

“Don’t. Hold. Back.”

It’s like a switch flipping. Even the way he looks at you changes. You’re not something to be cherished and adored. You feel like a deer pinned by a wolf. He’s got you in his clutches now and there’s a real possibility you might not survive this. 

He stands up, dropping you on the bed and dragging your hips off the edge. He doesn’t kick his jeans off, just lowers them enough for his cock to hang out. You’ll address the fact that he wasn’t wearing boxers later, you’re too worried about what’s hanging between his legs right now. 

You’re no virgin, but goddamn, there’s no way that’s going to fit. 

He laughs, the noise cruel and it makes shivers crawl down your spine. “We’ll make it work, kid.” He spreads your legs and you tilt your hips up, making it easier for him to just sip inside. 

There’s a slight stretch, but you’re already soaked for him. You’ve been waiting for this to happen since you walked in on him naked in your bathroom. “Oh, shit,” you toss your head back, taking in a deep breath while he pushes in. It feels like he’s rearranging your insides, molding you to fit him perfectly. 

You can already feel yourself clenching down, just being so close to him is enough to make that tingle in the tips of your toes start. He leans down, placing your legs over his elbows and rutting into you like a wild animal. There’s nothing gentle or slow about this. 

You’re both so pent-up, tired from the weeks of dancing around each other. Your nails drag up his back, blood following your movement. Your powers are actively surging against him, pain only driving you further into each other’s arms. 

You can hear his breathy grunts and groans in your ears and it’s music to you. Neither of you cares about the party going on just outside the door. You’re loud, skin slapping against skin while you loudly call out his name. 

God, you hope they hear you. Hope they realize just how thoroughly you’re wrecked for each other. You can feel yourself getting closer, hips stuttering against his while you struggle to match his pace. “Come on,” he mutters in your ear. He releases one of your legs to reach down and rub your clit. 

“Fuck,” you groan, reaching up and tugging at his hair while your back bows. It only takes a few more tight circles of his thumb before you’re spasming around him. He’s quick to follow behind you. 

He pins your hips to the bed, dropping your legs while he thrusts faster. He loses his rhythm, the muscles of his abdomen flexing as he cums inside you. It’s like a mini death, you feel like you’ve lost time when you finally manage to come back to yourself. 

And when you roll your head to the side you realize just how much damage you’ve done to Wade’s bed. “Shit,” You glance up at the sound of his voice and notice little droplets of blood on your hips. Logan’s claws are out, stuck in the fluff of the bed. 

You force the words out, tongue heavy in your mouth. “Do that often?”

“Not really,” he mutters. The claws retreat and he rubs his fingers over the blood. It’s not bad, you’ve honestly done worse to yourself. It’s like a big paper cut. When the rough pad of his fingers presses against the cut you hiss at the sting, nearly enjoying it. 

“Must be special,” you tell him with a cheeky grin. He shakes his head with a laugh and takes his time pulling out. You hate the loss of him inside you but it's a slight relief. He's larger than any partner you’ve ever had and it’s almost overwhelming to be so full. 

“Come on, let's get you dressed.” He pats your thighs, glancing around for your clothes. 

“Uh, Logan,” he looks up and you glance at his still very hard cock. “I thought you came?”

The smile he gives you is slightly terrifying. Because there’s a promise in it. He’s not getting you dressed for no reason. He’s taking you back to your apartment so you can have more fun where there are less people and fewer reminders of Wade. “Stamina's part of the deal, sweetheart.”

“Oh,” you whisper, voice breathless in shock. You wipe the cum off your legs with Wade’s sheets. You feel like you’ve thoroughly gotten revenge on him for destroying your favorite bed set. Maybe, you’ve gone a little farther than revenge, though. 

You feel guilty, looking around the room and seeing everything you destroyed. Once you’re dressed, you wave your hand, putting most things back where they belong. But there’s nothing you can do about the bed. The sheets are soaked with a mixture of yours and Logan’s releases and there are six holes dug deep in the bed from his claws. 

When you step out of the room with Logan, struggling to press down your hair and get it back into place, Blind Al is waiting by the door. She’s doing a line off the back of her hand when you pass by. You think you’ve almost made it scott-free when she yells, “Man, I wish I couldn’t fucking hear,” at you. 

You tense up, shoulders to your ears while you run to the door. Logan laughs, grabbing your coat for you and pressing a hand to your back while he leads you to the apartment. “Weren’t feeling so embarrassed earlier,” he teases. 

“Shut up,” you grumble, dragging him into the apartment to finish what you couldn’t on Wade’s bed. 

You’ve managed to keep any holes out of your bed, you just have to use your powers to keep his at bay. It’s nice, not having to explain why everything around you is levitating to the person you’re having sex with. There were a lot of awkward conversations that came from that. 

You’re lying on Logan’s chest, fingers idly running over the veins in his biceps. “I want to be serious about this,” you tell him. 

His hand pauses from where it’d been stroking your back. You sit up on your elbow so you can get a better look at him. “I mean it, I,” there’s no way to say this without sounding like a complete bitch. You just have to rip the bandaid off. 

You take in a deep breath, “I know that you still miss her,” you say, unwilling to say her name. Logan sits up, looking more serious now. “But I don’t want to be with you if you think that I’m going to turn into her. Or if you think that I’m the last connection you have to her. I’m not her, Logan, and I'm never going to be her.”

You expect anger on his face or regret, maybe. But you don’t expect him to laugh at you. You roll your eyes, lips pursed while you wait for him to finish. He notices the pissy expression on your face and quiets down, but you still see a smile fighting on his lips. 

“I know you’re not her. You could not be more different” he tells you with a slight smirk, like there’s an inside joke you’re missing out on. “I was married to her for a long time and I loved her. But we had our time together. Now, I just want my time with you. You’re not her,” he leans forward, pressing a sweet kiss to your forehead. “That’s why I want you.”

You feel your heart flutter in your chest and have to fight to keep a stupid grin off your face. “Okay,” you whisper. “Good, well as long as we’re on the same page,” you tell him, faux serious. He just rolls his eyes and pulls you back into his arms. 

You’re going to cuddle up beside him when you hear your phone going off like crazy on your nightstand. Your face pinches in confusion and you reach over to grab it. 

Wade

Did you fuckers have sex???

In my bed!!!!

And you didn’t invite me?!

….

Wade

Tell Logan I want his claws in me next

“Fuckin’ dumbass,” you mutter, throwing your phone somewhere on the bed. Logan laughs again, drawing you closer. 

a/n: i have a really weird tendency for masochism, idk what that’s about. I just feel like if you were having sex with this man, he’s taking you like a wild animal. also feel like I might be a one-hit wonder. the smut just wasn’t doing it for me this time guys nor was the angst, i’m disappointed in myself

I just don't think I did justice to his character in the movie, I might have made it too OOC/ if I did PLEASE let me know

end. — I do not own the characters or the comics/movies Wolverine/X-Men, but this writing is my own all rights reserved © not-neverland06 2024. do not copy, repost, translate & recommend elsewhere.

General Taglist: @evasmlp

Logan Taglist:  @nonamevenus ♡

[starrayblogs]

chai? i love chai!

a/n: i love pavitr, he's so silly and i wanna be best friends with him ..... so here i am- writing a short story because my brain is literally being occupied by him, and i'd like to share it with you. enjoy!

another a/n: i haven't actually watched the movie yet! it hasn't released where i am D:, but i have been so hyped for the movie i just can't wait to watch it! sooo, sorry if there are any plot mistakes!

pavitr prabhakar + gn!reader

you're a spiderperson! hoorah! feel free to imagine yourself as your spidersona ü

"i love chai tea!"

"what did you just say? chai means tea, bro! you're saying tea tea, would i ask you for a coffee coffee with room for cream cream?"

"no. no, i'm sorry."

giggles bubble up from your throat as you fail to keep yourself from bursting into full-blown laughter at miles. "this is not funny." miles points a finger at you, who is currently bent at the knees with arms wrapped around the torso while laughing.

after a few more seconds, you rise up straight and fan your face as you try to stop from laughing. "aw, man, that shouldn't have made me laugh so hard." you say in between breaths of composure.

"chai tea isn't funny!" pavitr exclaims, crossing his arms.

"oh no, of course it isn't. miles's reaction was." you snicker a bit as you glance to miles, who gave you a glare. "but, on the topic of chai, i love karak chai." the lenses on your mask curve at the bottom to show some sort of smile, with your masked eyes.

"what did you just say?" pavitr's lenses widen as his arms unfold. "did you just say karak chai? you know your chai!?" he gasps, coming up to you with a hand over where his mouth would be.

"yeah! i love chai!" your eyes grin as your shoulders rise a little.

"gwen, i can't believe you've brought such a nice, new guy!" he turns to give gwen a surprised look before he turns back to you, placing his hands on your shoulders. "tell me, new guy," you cut him off to say your name, which he says and resumes. "how did you come across karak chai? are you indian too?" he asks curiously.

"no, actually, but i did grow up with some indian cuisine around me!" you reply with as much excitement as him. he lets out an 'oooohh' as his lenses grin at you. "i like you, new guy!"

"oh come on, what about me?" miles interjects and gwen lets out a laugh that she quickly covers up by clearing her throat.

"you said chai tea." pavitr pulls away from your shoulders to point at miles.

"i said sorry!"

you laugh again, this time recovering faster when pavitr turns to face to you. "tell me," he says your name with a cheerful look in his masked eyes. "do you also like naan?"

"oh, obviously, but..." you hesitate by squinting your lenses a bit, which makes the spiderman in front of you tilt his head. "i'm more of a paratha person." you admit sheepishly.

pavitr gasps as his lenses widen again. he stares at you for a few seconds, which makes you nervous because you think you've said something to upset him. "i have never met another spiderman that knows about indian food..." he mumbles, but there was a bit of a surprised tone in his voice. "i just know we are going to be great friends!" he exclaims, moving over to give you a side hug.

your eyes widen a bit, but you grin. you happily hang your hand over his shoulder, just like he did with yours.

"you should totally try some indian food here when you get the chance. i know all the great places!" he offers, tilting his head to you. your lenses curve underneath at his offer.

"i'd love that, oh my gosh. now that i think of it, i kind of do miss the food." you chuckle, a hand coming up to pat your stomach absentmindedly.

"we should totally eat out together whenever you're here!" he says, his eyes and tone filled with joy which brings a smile to your eyes and lips underneath the mask.

"that sounds like a fun time." miles adds himself in, which makes pavitr's head turn away from you to reply.

"hmm... maybe it will do you so good too, teach you how to not make mistakes like chai tea again." he says, and miles lenses widen as his demeanor immediately brightens.

"awesome! can we get naan bread?" miles asks, which receives a not-so-happy reaction from the indian spiderman.

"what did you just say!?"

pavitr pulls himself off your shoulder to point and scold at miles again. you and gwen glance at each other before bursting into laughter together, watching as miles does his best to apologize.

[rintoshis-archived]

𝐃𝐀𝐑𝐊 𝐑𝐄𝐃 - ft. miles morales

🀄、pairings: miles morales x reader warnings: mentions of paranoia, death, mentions of blood, slightly angsty, fluff at the end, slow burn, legit doesn't make total sense, not proofread, lyric references, venom, profanities, kissing (nothing smutty), mentions of gwen and hobie, poor spanish (blame duolingo...), with translations, no actual current plot of atsv, own plot, might not make sense if you didn't watch the movie, mutants, giants, mentions of skinned bodies, false accusations, arguments, a lot more within these lines, peter being a bad mentor, involves miguel, margo, peter. w/c: 4,297 notes; i really did not expect this to be long ... but yeah! this might not make sense and there might be whole lotta ooc BUT THIS IS MY PLOT I DO WHAT I WANT RAHHHH 🤣🤣🔥🔥 anyways i didn't know what i went with the storyline but there are a lot of depressing moments here ... i hope y'all are ok btw .. okay bye ily

'SOMETHING BAD IS 'BOUT TO HAPPEN TO ME' You thought. Your paranoia didn't help you sleep at night, the empty feeling of always being secluded from the world. Your dimension didn't have any Spider-people, and in contrast to Miles's dimension; it was harder to pick yourself up and fight for the city.

The feeling of cold sheets wrapping around your limbs, the fabric only bringing you more comfort. His smell lingered on your pillows, his jacket hanging on the back of your door. You didn't wanna leave Miles. The banging headache raised when you cried for the rest of the night, tears flowing down your cheek.

This might be pathetic, sure. But you weren't happy with the world you were born into. You missed the vibrant city of Miles's dimension, the moments you spent together to train him to become the best Spiderman of the century. You could only laugh at that thought.

Your eyes are glued onto your ceiling, the empty white color reflecting your current mind. Hell, if you could go back; you would. Your eyes close heavily, and the feeling of your hot eyelids resting on your eyes.

'I DON'T KNOW IT BUT I FEEL IT COMING.' The returning feeling of being helpless, a deep voice circulating in your mind. As much as you didn't wanna admit it, you were fragile. The Spider that bit you wasn't as ordinary as you thought. That goes without saying; Miles got bit by an unordinary spider, too. But something about that insect made it a little more special than other Spider origins.

The Spider actually talked to you. Its venom projects into your blood cells, infesting your mind and body. ''The city needs you, the city needs you, the city needs you, the city needs-'' If you could spray bug repellent inside of your head, you would've done it already. The echoing voice inside of your brain didn't subside even after you've covered your ears with pillows.

You were restless. Your spider suit resting on your chair. The radio your dad previously had woken you from your slumber, the screams and sounds of innocent people screaming, a cop reporting for backup.

''This is Agent- Shit! Get away- We need backup, now! Call for the nearest-'' The voice cuts off, only leaving you with the sound of a broken stereo. Out of instinct, your webs sling the radio to your hands, turning some of the knobs to get more surface of the situation.

Nothing comes out, the last person who reported to the station was that 'Agent'. You hop out of bed, took the suit, and quickly put it on. You contemplated for a while, but the sudden shiver of guilt only awoken the voice that whispered in your ear. ''The city needs you, the city needs you, the city needs you, the city needs you.''

The sounds of police car's sirens echoed in the street, a building being griefed by an explosion. Big claws and bloodied cement was the scenery when you arrived. You heard a lady scream in an alleyway, and all of the police cars emptied out of people. No cop was left alive, they were all skinned out of their bodies.

''G-Get away from me!'' The lady's voice stung your Spider-sense, the sound of big feet stepping towards the lady. You were on the walls, peeking at the villain. It had a broad back, spikes decorating its spine, and green and vibrant reptile skin. You land on the floor, attaching your webs to the spikes of its back. ''You heard the lady.''

Your webs were strong enough to pull the reptile back, jumping high to let it sling behind you. A loud thud could be heard miles away, the cement of the building cracking from the giant's impact. You approach the lady, putting two hands up. ''Are you okay?''

The lady's eyes widened while looking behind you, your spider sense didn't detect the big chunk of cement that was coming your way. Your hands almost act instinctively, grabbing ahold of the cement before it crushed the two of you.

Your webs threw the brick back, crumbling on the body of the reptile. ''You should run.'' you flash a small smile of assurance to the lady, webbing the two buildings to get closer to the villain. Your eyes catch a small glimpse of a black and red suited person in the sky, spider sense tingling at the sight. Your head turns to the building where it landed, getting distracted from what was in front of you.

''Move!'' A voice echoes from the roof of the building, your head quickly turns back to the lizard, his hands almost grabbing a hold of you. A sudden bolt of lightning almost blinded you, causing your eyes to close at the brightness.

A huge hole in the sky opens, the edges of it being coated with pink, purple, and hints of green. It looked like it glitched into the sky, with strings of what looked like webs inside of it. Miles had already electrocuted the lizard for a short time, as he approached you.

''Y/N! I'm here!'' His hands wrap around your torso, feeling your warmth over your suit. ''Miles?'' Your hands wrap around his neck, pulling him into a hug. ''H-how are you here? What the fuck is that?'' You ask of the hole in the sky, some of the cars and poles flying inside of it.

''Listen, we need to go.'' His hands grab yours, webbing to the closet rooftop. ''No... No! I need to see my aunt-'' Your eyes widen, his hands pulling you into the black hole. Your argument with your aunt didn't lull even after the 'talk' you both had.

''¡Dios mío, Y/N! Te lo dije una vez, dos veces, trice! Y no nos escuchaste ni a mí ni a tu mamá!'' (Oh my gosh, Y/N! I told you once, twice, thrice! And you didn't listen to me or your mom!) Your hands slam the door on your aunt, refusing to continue this talk with your aunt. You had just lost your dad, you couldn't save him from that stupid mutant that appeared right in your dad's station house. Your dad's friends whom you even considered your own; dead before your eyes, bodies laying and pierced in her stomachs. ''Do not slam that door on me, we are not done!'' Your aunt opens your door with pressure, her words poisoning the whole room. ''Tía, yo también te lo dije un millón de veces!'' (Aunt, I told you a million times too!) It wasn't your fault. It wasn't your fault that your dad still wanted to be the hero even when he can't. It was his fault. ''¿Cuántas veces tengo que decir esto? You can't be meddling in the policía's jobs! You killed your-'' (How many times do I have to say this?) ''Get out!'' Your webs shut your door with force, webbing the door handle closed. ''No entiendes, tía, I didn't kill Papa!'' (You don't understand, Aunt) ''You just don't understand, Y/N! Your mom is crying, the whole police is after you! They think you murdered your father! You need to stop, Y/N. You are not the 'hero' of this city!'' Your auntie bangs on your door, but your hands remain on your ears, cuddled up to your pillow.

It 'MIGHT BE SO SAD, MIGHT LEAVE MY NOSE RUNNING.' You couldn't leave your auntie, and your mom didn't stop crying, she stopped coming to her job and didn't speak to anyone else.

'I JUST HOPE SHE DON'T WANNA LEAVE ME.' Those words ring inside of Miles's head, he had already fought his battle with Miguel just to see you again, and he was willing to go through it all over again.

''Listen, your aunt will be fine! You'll be safe there!'' Miles tries to pull you in, and you let him. You take his words and put them inside of your heart. The feeling of being airborne in the galaxy takes over your senses, a huge tube leading you both into another portal. Your hands tremble inside Miles's grasp.

You both land in an elevator, a platform bringing you to up top.

His thumb rubs your skin, hoping to have calmed you down. You both fall into an elevator, Miles's hands still intertwined with yours. ''I should probably explain, huh?'' You didn't respond, your mind almost wandering away staring at the wall. ''Y/N?'' When the warmth of Mile's skin leaves yours, your head turns to him.

''Did you say something?'' ''Yeah... Did you listen?'' ''No... Sorry, could you repeat that?'' You hear Miles sigh, his hands knotted with each other to his chest. ''Well, Miguel wanted me to pick you up... Kinda.'' Your head tilts a little, and a tinge of unsureness laced Miles's words. ''Kinda?'' You ask, almost surveying him. ''Well I did kinda sneak out and asked Margo to take me to your dimension but that's not the important part!''

Miles raises his hands as if it were for defense and you laugh. ''You're so stupid.'' You nudge his shoulder. ''Why'd you take me here-'' You feel almost a big punch in your stomach as if you'd glitched out in a game. ''Woah!'' Miles panicked, rummaging through his pockets. You were surprised he had put pockets in his suit. Maybe you have to do that, sometime.

''I forgot to give you this.'' He takes your hand before you glitch out again and put on the bracelet on your wrist. Nausea stopped, feeling a little bit better from the piece of silicone around your skin. You laugh a little, seeing Miles's panicked expression even from over his mask. You took off your own mask, breathing in some air. ''So.. Why'd you take me here?''

Miles took off his, too. ''Well, I missed you, of course.'' A window appears behind you both, the land seemingly upside down. ''Woah...'' ''We're in Nueva York.'' The door opens, and Miles captures your hands in his, leading you to the upside-down hallways.

''T-there's so many...'' You didn't expect almost a hundred- maybe more Spider-people. All of them were different, some were on wheelchairs, some were riding horses, and some were incubated in a yellow-orange barrier.

After what seemed like a million light-years, you both reached a dark part of the building, a girl who seemed like she was purple waved at you two and started working back on her computer.

''Miles Morales.'' A dark voice grew out of the dark, a floating platform lowering from the sky. ''Miguel, we're back.'' ''Another outsider.'' Miguel turned to face you both, the man looked like he hadn't slept in years. You frown at his comment, he didn't know who you were.

''Miguel O'Hara, this is Y/N L/N.''

An infant webbed around the room and caught you three off-guard. ''Mayday! Good job Honey!'' A man with a baby carrier enters the room, phone pointed at the child. Mayday, cute name. You smile at the sight of a cute baby webbing freely, she'll be a good Spiderwoman when she grows up. ''Miles! I haven't seen you in so long!'' The man put his phone back in his pocket, putting two of his hands on your shoulders.

''Peter!'' ''Miles! Hey, bud! Who's this?'' Peter smiles at you, and you give him another smile back. ''I'm Y/N.'' You shook his hand, and he immediately pulled away to catch Mayday. She was climbing on Miguel, a funny sight to see. You didn't fail to see how Miguel was so... Muscular. His webs looked different, it looked like it glowed with a orange light.

You knew to not fuck with him, especially when he was the only one in the room who didn't wear a bracelet to keep him from not glitching out. ''Y/N L/N. You must know what kind of place this is, I assume?'' Miguel says, capturing Mayday in his hands. Miles looked at you, slight panic arising in his eyes.

''Uhm, I brought her here. She can help me, Hobie, and Gwen-'' ''There are enough problems that I have to deal with. Put her back, Morales.'' You didn't know who Hobie or Gwen was, but Miles mentioned that they went on missions together. That Miguel had a foul mouth, for sure.

''You've caused enough shit, Morales! The start of the spot, breaking a canon event, and even rebelling against my rules!'' Miguel webbed down to the floor and threw a bomb on the floor. Once it hit your foot, it opened up a dome.

''What the fuck-'' You try banging on the walls, the sounds outside almost being muffled from the inside. ''Miles!'' ''Enough is enough, Morales. I guess I'll have to send you both back then.'' You see Miles trying to bargain with Miguel, but Peter interrupts. ''Miguel, loosen up pal. Let them experience their puppy love in the HQ, gosh they're so cute together-'' Miguel shoots a web to Peter's mouth and put him in a dome as well.

'DON'T YOU GIVE ME UP, PLEASE DON'T GIVE UP.' These words fill your mind, still trying to get out of the barrier. Your words couldn't reach Miles as he backed up beside you, his hands on the dome. ''Miguel, for someone who's the so-called 'master' of HQ, you really don't know how to stop making the same mistake all over again.''

Miles shatters the projected dome and takes your hand to escape out of the HQ. Peter waves at you both as a goodbye, seemingly proud of Miles for what he did. ''You're a bad mentor,'' Miguel says, chasing you both. The dome fades away, and Peter takes off the web on his mouth. Peter grabs Mayday's pacifier and put it in her mouth. ''Let's go, honey!'' Peter chasing you both.

''If I would've known we'd be running from a Headmaster of an HQ full of Spider-people, I would've come prepared, Miles.'' You two web from wall to wall, knocking some people over and leaving them with a short 'sorry'.

''It's not like- Woah-! I planned this to happen!'' You laugh at his words, keeping up with his pace. ''You can't let me leave you in the dust, Miles!'' You pass Miles, but he quickly catches up. ''I won't!'' He grabs your hand and slings you on his back, sticking onto him like a koala. You both giggle a bit while making your way to Margo. ''I missed you... I missed... Us.''

You rest your head on Miles's shoulder. ''What you said earlier... Who's Hobie and Gwen?'' ''Some friends of mine.'' You smile, kissing his cheek. ''Gwen, huh?'' Miles laughs at the pout that he felt on his skin, ''HONEY, I BELONG WITH YOU AND ONLY YOU, BABE.'' Miles's words made you smile as you both land in Margo's office, seeing her work away on her computer.

''Miles. What did you do now?'' Margo didn't look back, she already knew what you both wanted. ''Send us back to my world,'' Miles says, but your eyes almost want to disagree with him. Miles notices the slight worry in your eyes, he only captures your hands in response.

You knew you'd always wanted to go to Mile's dimension and spend time with him and Mrs. Morales. ''Alright. But I can't guarantee you'll be able to go back to HQ in one piece.'' Margo stated, her spider was already ready for you both.

''Miles, why are you doing this to yourself?'' Margo asks, as you both hop on the platform, hands still in his. ''I JUST DON'T WANT HER TO LEAVE ME.'' Margo only rolls her eyes with a smile and started her machine. The spider started knitting a cocoon around you two, and your hands tighten in nervousness.

''It'll be okay. As long as you have that bracelet, we can live together forever, happily.'' Miles reassures you, tucking hair behind your ear. Miles snakes a hand around your waist and pulls you in for a kiss once the spider finished webbing.

Miguel and Peter could only stare at you both, Peter looking like he was lovestruck. Peter's hands rest on Mayday's eyes while Miguel only rubs his temples. ''Oi! No lovey-dovey in the machine!'' Margo teases before it teleports you both.

A FEW MONTHS AFTER ...

''Miles, Y/N! Dinner!'' ''Innaminute!'' Miles screams out while you two were playing on a PS4 in the living room. Lieutenant Morales watched you two, occasionally taking photos of you both. ''That's unfair!'' You laugh at Mile's whining when you threw a banana on the road, causing his character to slip.

''See 'ya! Eat my dust!'' Miles bit his lip in concentration, leaning his body on where his character would go, bumping into each other. ''Dinner is getting cold, you three!'' Mrs. Morales approaches you three in the living room, catching her husband taking a video of you two playing games.

Her head rests on his shoulder, smiling at the view. ''Amor de cachorro, eh?''(Puppy love, huh?) Mr. Morales laughs and kisses his own wife once you two finally finished the game. You jump in celebration, laughing at Miles's frown. ''I won! I thought you were the best of this game-'' Miles grabs your hand and pulls you into his lap, kissing your lips.

Once Miles's parents finished smooching Mr. Morales interrupts you both. ''Oi! No kissing in the house!'' You smile on Miles's lips before pulling away from his lap. ''I'm hungry.'' ''Let's go eat?'' ''Race 'ya there!'' ''No fair!'' ''Don't run in the house!''

Because in the day, you both are just teenagers attending school, but at night you both have duties to save the city.

woahwoah this was so long ... ‧₊˚ ⋅ fusaes 2023 do not copy

[l0vergirlatheart]

Hello! I have this idea/request for sagau loosely based off of me and my friend’s dynamic where there are two separate creators. Like, not two reader clones or smth just two separate people, either of them can be reader, or both??? Idk, just do whatever you want with this idea :)

They both play genshin, and both of their accs r self aware. One of them is a whale who has all the characters and plays everyday. However, they dont know much about building characters because their fav part of the game is the lore and knows a lot abt it and always talks while playing. The other is a f2p that plays for several weeks straight before taking along break, and only has their fav characters (COUGH wanderer COUGH) and they are the type to never speak AT ALL while gaming. They also have more of a meta player mindset while building their fav characters and doesnt care for much for the lore.

I just like to imagine how the genshin cast would react to them in coop, especially for the first time. Just seeing one of them rant to the other about the lore or seeing one of them one shot all the enemies. And imagine two if the same characters from the different accs meeting each other.

absolutely love the idea of two wanderers as that silly little fucking spiderman meme

also there's scaramouche instead of wanderer for now for the plot

DOUBLES! ft. scaramouche and albedo

c.w // spoilers for sumeru quest and scara's backstory, heavy(?) angst in scara's part, pet names BECAUSE I CAN!!1!11!! GRAHH

start under cut

ALBEDO

"What are these talent levels?? Why'd you crown Albedo's normal attack? It's the most useless in his kit- you know you should've leveled his Skill, right?" You said, while you looked at your friends Albedo- it honestly hurt to look at.

"Uh.. Yeah, I totally knew that.. I just was.. testing it.. out..?" Your friend mumbled into their mic, obviously lying.

Meanwhile, in one of your worlds, two Albedos were silently watching the other.

'Why is there another me? I could've swore I killed Dorian.. but he also has a star mark. It looks exactly like mine.' They both thought to themselves.

Eventually, one of them spoke out.

"Who are you?" Albedo said, staring at the other blankly, the smallest bit of confusion and fascination only seen if you truly tried to look for it hard within his eyes.

"I am Albedo."

"I am also Albedo. Are you sure you're really 'Albedo'?"

"Are you sure you're Albedo?"

This went on for a while.. neither of them were like this usually, but the other just wouldn't give up. Both were persistent when curiosity had peaked, and this just got very interesting.

end : 1/2

SCARAMOUCHE

"...well, that was one hell of a boss fight.." You mumbled under your breath.. you had barely managed to make it out of Scaramouche's boss fight alive-- half of your characters were dead, and the others were barely hanging on by a thread-- you truly need to thank the ancient Genshin cooks for Sweet Madames and Chicken Mushroom Skewers..

"It sucks that Scara really thinks that about himself. I mean, sure, he was abandoned by Raiden, but not because he was weak or anything. It's really because she just didn't want to control every aspect of his life, but there are of course, better ways she could've done that. You do have to understand that both made mistakes that lead them to where they are now, and..." You went off on a ramble, and unbeknownst to you, a certain purple-haired boy was listening to everything that spilled from your lips.

Everything he's ever known and believed in-- it was all just.. just a misunderstanding? He felt hopeless all of a sudden, he felt like falling.. and he did.

That's when you looked back at the screen, suddenly knocked out of your rambling state and (semi)yelled out, "Oh shit, ain't nobody gonna catch him?!" ...and nobody did. You silently flinched at the sound of the impact-- even through a screen, you could tell that hurt horribly.

"Oh no, poor darling.." You mumbled sympathetically as you read each and every word stated and said during the 'quest,' just like you did with each and every other one. You knew all of this yet you still felt so sad for the poor puppet Scaramouche. He really didn't deserve any of that, you thought to yourself as you wished you could've done something, or that you could do something.. if only it weren't through a screen.

Scaramouche hated being pitied, but maybe.. maybe if it was you, he didn't mind, and maybe he felt a small sense of pride because it meant in some way, and at some point, you cared for him.. and that filled him with more joy than either of you realized, and much more joy than you ever will even think.

end : 2/2

[pumpkinstrawbrew]

🆃🅷🅴 🆆🅸⨢.🅲🅷🅸🅽🅶 🅷△🆄🆁.

>>> the grim adventures of jon n' jack. feat batman n' spiderman. <<<

...

it was only a matter of time, before i would have made another crossover with those two. i can't deny, that they are very 1:1 for me, when it comes to comics supervillains. so why not to mix one awesome n' beloved thing with another? esp since funny enough, they do have quite a few similar plot-points. well, the halloween themed costume aside. i mean it goes as far as jack once having the bat-themed boyfriend pal, which reminds me of someone else, i know.

anyho'...

i've tried to make my notes more or less readable here, but they still might be a bit scattered. i attempted to keep them as short as possible, but i just cannot talk 'small'.

1. the first art is low-key based on underdeveloped AU, that i have about the early comic scarecrow n' modern jack meeting n' hitting it off serial killiar style. considering, that both of them possess killing methods, which have a noticable tradmark to it, i imagine that they will leave one hell of a mess behind, while traveling across the country. in that timeline, batman is dead. n' jack's shitty foster dad was killed off earlier on. neither of them knows what to do with themselves, since the people who they had *twisted* emotional conection with are gone. without any direction, they meet in the middle, n' decide that they can as well team-up n' try to make being a villain fun again. jon might experiment on their victims *or torture them if its his ex bullies* n' then give them to jack, who would scoop their brains out and put candle inside their skull. n' uh yeah, he literally did it in the comic. i was honestly surpised that marvel come up with smth that creepy. it really sounds more alined with dc, if anything. but either way, here they are. two *grieving* psychos going downtown. they will make one another so much worse, i imagine. n' they will totally kill that npc dude btw.

2. dark magic n' the drip. or jon n' jack at their corniest. like, jonathan looks like he watched too much the nightmare before christmas n' jack dress up like count dracula for no reason. it's so random-ish n' cheesy. but with this being said, i love both of those designs, n' think, that they really suit the vibe of comic issues in which they were featured. jack always came off as a he-witch to me, but it was nice to see it being played on in a different way. n' then, crane really rocks his own outfit as well. i totally need to draw him in it more often, haha. they dress up for a halloween party for real this time. n' well, i added batman n' spiderman into the mix here, bc i kinda wish that they got to fight / interact with those versions of jon n' jack. it would have been fun for a few reasons. also this can be technically counted as shipping art, but can be viewed as your typical gloating bad guy n' helpless hero thing too. n' to clear any possible questions, i only create stuff with adult peter parker. like cartoon era/late early comics, 20 smth one. i love my spiderman being of age, where he can legally mingle with his villains, not be detained at school lol.

3. the classic four from the timeline, when the comic plots were a bit more ligthearted. aka during the times, when the deadly mercenary n' crazy scientist were robbing banks, instead of harming *torturing* people. i love dark stuff, but there is charm to how 'simple' the scarecrow's and jack's goals once were. n' i love how the scarecrow used to do the lil, dorky dances. it really suits him. n' since at least 2 or maybe, most of jack o' lanterns are southernish in their roots like jon, i had an idea of them having a country dance *in the middle of graveyard* kinda just makes sense to me, haha. batman and spiderman merely happen to find them like that. n' well, it's kinda awkward. esp bc they technically don't do anything bad. i also imagine spiderman being like 'oh, so you have one of those too'. which is mostly a ref to how both the scarecrow n' jack were called 'the reject from land of oz' by other characters. they can rejoice here.

4. the develish & undead duo!! my friend once told me to try n' watch older superhero cartoons, and at first i was like 'welp, they prob be hella boring'. but then i caved in, n' watched a couple of superfriends episodes. as result, i fell in love with their scarecrow's desingh! it was unexpected tbh. usually, i prefer jon's older, classic scarecrow look. so no straw hair, less features exposed, just a hat n' a sack on his head, but their version of him actually did it for me. i find their crane both creepy n' cute. n' i also read on wiki, that he might be undead. so that bit interested me as well. non-human jonathan crane, what a concept! him returning from the grave just to be a menace to batman. n' to accompany him, there is an undead jack o' lantern from the ghost rider comic. his corpse literally got possessed by satan. anyways, both of them raised army of zombies. both of them undead n' prob won't ever get out of their spooky suits, since i don't think that they can. n' funny enough, jack's hometown was called sleepy hollows, if i remember correctly. so they can haunt people there, make it into a truly cursed land.

5. the last one was kinda spontaneous on my part. the other day, i was looking at what kind of action figures the scarecrow n' jack have. saw one, where jon was looking kinda strange, all black n' yellow. which is how i find out that he *apparently* got yellow lantern powers in newer comics, even if it was like for 10 seconds or smth. i didn't read the issue itself, but i found the idea kinda fun, n' his design was decent enough for me to get interested n' wonder what i can do with it. then, a bit later, i saw that jack had a venom-funko figure. i don't think, that he was ever canonically venomized in any of the actual comic issues, but once again, the mere idea of it happening was enough for me to consider doing smth with it. i mean, a venom-like tongue, but its made out of fire? dang. that's kinda cool. so yeah. the yellow lantern scarecrow n' symbiote jack o' lantern being the double trouble. if they weren't enough of a mean goblin-man before, now they surely will be.

[anonymous-dentist]

GOD I LOVE YOUR AU ok question time

- who is in the federation of heros? What founded the federation? Are they powered like cellbit?

- how is cellbit one of the first few born? I feel theres a science experiment plot caught in this and he broke containment. I wonder if he found this out due to being able to scare himself, and that fear immediately projecting to others, making THEM just as scared. Id imagine hed be diagnosed with severe paranoia/etc and then like. Oh SHIT its not. That. Oh fuck.

- what was that leadup that made him a supervillain? Something so minuscule yet so big as fear, to be considered one of the high villains of the city is insane. Some people would probably laugh it off an say physical destruction was scarier than mental, until they see what he actually does.

- who did he murder?????? I wonder if it was someone who defied the "everyones fears projected back to them" ability. Someone unaffected by this, like maybe their own ability counteracted it. One of the federations lower ranked heros attacked... as a citizen... i feel theres more than meets the eye here..... but of course it ended with murder. I feel there could be done with something of luzu and his look alike there.

- i still keep thinking about breaking dawn and how forever is also considered richas's dad, and just thinking about it being kinda switched in this scenario. Cellbit walked into forevers life again an now richas has another dad to annoy the piss out of. Though i do feel him an jaiden would be at each others throats in investigation. She would totally be a foh member to me. He tries to take down them through HER.

- why jaiden? Shes probably the most visible with her apparent ability. I imagine her having hummingbird like abilities. Flying at such a fast rate it can change the force of wind itself, etc etc etc (running on coffee an headaches atm sorrie) but she KNOWS something. She knows the foh is fucked up. She knows its dictating the definition of right an wrong, but she doesnt have the power (YET!!!!!!) to kill them from the inside out.

- heros who are seen as the light amongst the city, vigilantes who are the underbelly of a growing problem/an antibiotic refusing to kill the infection, and singular villain who wants to put a stop to it for all. God. I am jn love with this au im sorry can u tell

- and then theres fucking SPIDER MAN. nobody knows who he may work for since, by the logic of q city, if your a vigilante, your working for someone else directly related to the foh, and being sponsored as such. But theres no calling for spiderman, theres even active "have you seen this person" signs around the city, marking them as a non verbalized threat to the standing of foh. Cellbits key.

- now he needs to convince his friends to help him find spiderman. For....... research. Yes. Totally. He wishes to interview spiderman in hopes to figure out "who he works for", which not really. Hes not the best at lying, nor was he really trying. He wants to crack down the foh to its rotten core.

- he even tries to ask roier for help at some point, right? He talks about the signs around the city, says its a shame that hes on a watch list- and how he swings around to actively web heros against the walls to stop them from hurting another person.

- and its convinent theyre on a coffee date (cellbit didnt even notice, roier did, an hes just awkwardly like... hahahahabah thats really weird why would spiderman stop him but also yeah i get that- why would thet get rid of MY hero <:((("

- cellbits subconsciously like. Shit. Pretty boy is pouting about the vigilante. More reason to find the motherfucker.

SORRY ITS SO LONG ENJOY THE RAMBLEEEE

WOW OKAY so let’s see:

1. It’s a lot like the Federation from the canon qsmp, but it’s also more overtly focused on ‘Protecting the City’ from superpowered threats. It stepped in to fill the shoes of the former police state, and by getting rid of the majority of police officers it both opened up opportunities for villains (and thus heroes and thus the Federation) and for heroes (see: previous parentheses.) The founder is anonymous, a “Mister Duck”.

2. I’m actually lowkey playing by MHA rules. Basically, at some point a couple of decades ago, kids started being born with superpowers. It was the more obvious ones that were discovered first, like a girl in France being born with little duck wings. Cellbit’s ability is less obvious, but his parents were constantly overly worried about him because babies and children are always very very scared of everything. Eventually he realized what was up when he was around nine or ten, but he didn’t really tell anybody because even back then he knew that he would “get in trouble” for it.

3. As for villainy, it was an accident. He needed money after his parents died (of sudden heart attacks, and he pretends he doesn’t know what that actually means), and he isn’t a very intimidating guy on his own, so he kinda… helped himself out a little. And it worked super well, so he kept doing it. And he kept doing it. And then he started going a bit overboard with it and the people he was robbing started dying, too.

4. And as for the murder, Cellbit and the hero were both civilians when they got into an argument. The hero, new to the whole thing, ended up using their ability and actually attacked him. He attacked back, notably without using his ability, and he accidentally killed them. The Feds were NOT happy about this, so they messed with the court proceedings and got him sent to prison for three years. But, hey, at least he got therapy there?

5 and 6. Jaiden is 100% working with the Federation in this au. She and Spider-Man are taking very different approaches to what is fundamentally the same issue here. I think her ability is more parrot-y, but she does work for them now. (It’s a very recent development.)

8-10. Spider-Man is a fan-favorite and the Federation does NOT appreciate him ruining their image!! And he knows that he isn’t well liked by them at the moment, and he doesn’t care because it’s fine if Spider-Man dies. He has a job to do, and he is going to do it.

11-end. And it’s a good thing that Cellbit is such a big Spider-Man fan! It’s something Roier thinks they can use to bond. Definitely. Bonding.

…Can you tell superhero aus are my guilty pleasure lol

[themculibrary]

Hello! Apologies if this comes off as rude, but is there any way for you to schedule the Betty/Ned masterlist soon? I'd also like some recs if you don't mind. Again, apologies if it comes off as rude, I am only wondering.

Not rude at all! I will definitely try to work on it this week and get that scheduled for you. Here's some fics we have so far on the masterlist:

A Soft Place to Land (ao3) - Typewriter_witchcraft betty/ned, peter/flash N/R, 98k

Summary: "With great power comes great responsibility." Yeah, right. More like, with great power comes stab wounds and bloody sheets and a hero complex that could take down even the strongest of men. And Peter, well, he isn't the strongest of men. Not to mention that Peter's hero complex doesn't exactly extend to himself.

May still doesn’t know that he’s Spiderman. Because of this, she also doesn’t know about his increased metabolism, hunger, strength, sensitivity, everything. He didn’t really notice, for the first few weeks, until he hears May on the phone with one of her work friends discussing how she didn’t realize how much teenage boys eat. Peter immediately stopped eating.

Flash knows something is up. He knows the signs, or at least he thinks he does. And he's going to get to the bottom of things, one way or another.

boy problems (ao3) - AppleJuiz betty/ned, mj/peter T, 4k

Summary: But with MJ, it seems less like something that Peter is interested in and more like an inevitability, a sure thing, a lasting thing, because of all the looks and the rhythm and the way they match deep down.

Watching Peter and MJ most days feels like watching a prologue in montage, like a plane before takeoff, like they’re getting ready to soar right into the sky together.

He’s not sure where that leaves him.

we can follow the sparks (i'll drive) (ao3) - softnslow mj/peter, betty/ned T, 19k

Summary: It's like she's had an epiphany, a sudden rush of urge crashing into her beating heart.

She's in love with him.

alternatively:

betty brant can't date until michelle does, but she falls in love with ned leeds. michelle jones doesn't date, but for the sake of betty, she devises a plan to fake-date peter parker.

plot twist: she ends up falling in love with him.

With a Little Help From My Friends (ao3) - spideysmjs peter/mj, betty/ned T, 14k

Summary: The chimes above the door shake, twinkling as three girls walk in, interrupting Freddy. He looks up from his trivia cards, Betty smacks down another shot glass of vodka, and Peter’s jaw drops almost instantly as if he’s been struck by Cupid’s arrow.

Betty’s eyes follow Peter’s.

She chuckles. They’re totally going to lose now.

Betty and Peter are the reigning champions of Ray's Trivia Night... until they meet Michelle.

EDIT:

this masterlist is set to be posted for tomorrow afternoon!

[not-souleaterpost]

The Warring Visions of Gravity Rush

Well I don't have the motivation to concentrate on something more productive, might as well atleast write out my spit-take.

Gravity Rush has bad direction. Fitting about a game where you are falling upwards...

Or better said, it has like five different "directions" that clash. And I don't mean in a way that compliments each other or that leads to something interesting, but more just so that it pulls everything down as gravity tends to do.

But what do I mean by this? Well lets talk about Gravity Rush as the marketing idea, as the ideal you have in your head when you imagine this "totally hidden gem revolutionary experience!"

You might see the crazy gameplay, or the few pieces of promo that had this atmosphere that is hard to describe. Or you saw the main protagonist and had some reservations and thought "well she may be designed to appeal to one's lower insticts, but still she has a weird dress and look, so it probably isn't all just that, right?"

Right - its partly like that. And thats the first part that really clashes and jusy kinda makes one groan while playing - Kat is the most boring animu girl you could imagine, inclusive of all the worst cliches, like literally the overplayed scene of a kinda loser male lead stumbling upon her after a shower and her losing the towel, even a deaf person could here the "Baka!" screeching in the void of the evil eye...

But how much can one cry about the evils of some anime thot and overused tropes? But that isnt the only kinda meh direction - cause they also go for the superhero thing. Yeah, maybe it was a different time when the game released, but in this day I am sorry, somehow superheros are the most lame thing I can imagine. I mean I loved the Raimi Spiderman movies but after that it just allways felt kinda dumb - even with anime I atleast have this connection of watching and finding some stuff interesting as a teen, while superheros just looked childish even back in the day.

Still, thats just personal stuff, and comics are comics, heroes are heroes, where is the problem, right, they are not different directions, I'm just making an arbitrary distinction.

Well maybe, but there are a few more cardinal things that truly show the wrong way the game took. Cause as I said it has this whole ethereal, mysterious vibe - and combined with the previous stuff it just synthesises into some corrosive poison, making my enthusiasm melt as fast as I have to play another wacky dream sequence or see some other hatsune miku haired plot device explain time dillation - it just blends into a stew with no taste or texture.

But that still isnt the whole story - the whole game trys to go in the whimsical direction, like that one french movie "Amile" (with the fake language sounding like French) - with all the all town looking citys and music - but combined with everything else, it just kinda makes the sound feel flat and lifeless, - especially when one doesnt see Kat being this mysterious nonchalant force in this world - well maybe in moments - but that breaks down cause we have to do the whole "insecure teenage girl who wants to find a bf" thing which breaks everything.

But I dunno, maybe Im too harsh, maybe I'm just projecting my own current bad mood on some old ps vita game - in the end I had fun, and the most fun I had... Was when after finishing the game I collected gems after having many movement updated while blasting this:

And this is kinda my point,my synthesis - It isnt impossible to mash things together that seem to fight against each other - one just needs the vission.

(skip to 26:04 for the song, then you'll see what I mean)

Hell, to prove my point - I will even go against my prude persona, and give an example that keeps the fanservice aspects:

What if, to show the otherwordless of Kat, how she is a stranger that changes this mysterious world, she actually doesnt even mind when somebody sees her naked? Is maybe even confused? (Hell, plays with the garden of Eden imagary that went nowhere if the spoilers of the sequel I read were right ((yeah I know it also was Newtons apple cause of Gravity, but things can have double meanings) - maybe have Kat be amused at being called a superhero, being a friend to children so being happy if they are - maybe then the whimsical music would work too - being from the perspective of a desolate town being visited by a elf-like being who brightens their day and solves their problems?

Maybe make Kat show that she understands the cryptic meta stuff (but in a subtle way) - basically keeping the feeling of mystery, making the player wonder, if they themselves understand the person they are literally playing as (I know one usually wants players to connect with the charachter, but I think in this case it would work)

So yeah, I dunno, maybe Im the only person in all of time that sees it this way. Maybe the direction they went is actually the right one-

Nah I cant say that after watching that animation that supposedly connects the first game to the sequel : With all the most boring cliches of "Oh the happy go lucky protagonist that loves food!" and "oh these cute girls sure love touching each other, arent they cute😉, figurine link to your left💲" - and then ending with some nonsense fight against enemys that have the same design philosophy as Vtubers... Yeez louis😂

And then reading how the story basically retcons away the kids who were lost in the past in some DLC and introducing even more Meta peeps like some guy who represents the game being programming, and the evil being electrycite which seems to be faux deep like "wow its a steam world and they put away the dangerous of this technology🤯" - like they have literal airships and jetpacks and the protagonist has gravity powers aint nothing impressive or dangerous about electricity😂

I dunno, in the end, what I mean is that Gravity Rush is an idea that had potential, that even has fun gameplay and great moments, so its sad when something like that gets dragged down to the levels of those awful on all levels Waifu Rpgs like Xenoblade 2 (yeez louis, even without all the drama, its gameplay looks like waterboarding to me "watch these shitty animations and cluttered ui while grinding and collecting crap for 80 hours!")

Anyways I prolly went on too long and shit on to many things people here maybe like. So in case you are angry:

Yeah...Sorry

[jordoalejandro]

The Twelfth Annual List of Movies I Saw the Past Year

After I watch movies that qualify for these Movies I Saw lists, I like to jot down some notes and give each of them a letter grade. I find that system more natural than stars. It’s hard to tell the difference between a 7 out of 10, a 7.5 out of 10, and an 8 out of 10. But the difference between a B+ and B- movie? That makes sense to me.

Anyway, I was looking back at my notes for the last few lists and realized that, this year included, I’ve only given one movie an A (I don’t bother with an A+. An A is an A.) in the last three years: Spiderman: No Way Home. And, if I’m being honest, there are things in that film I definitely could’ve dinged it down to an A- for. I just had such a good time and appreciated it so much that I chose to ignore those issues. That doesn’t seem like a sound grading system but it’s really more of an art than a science.

This whole lead in is just to say: that’s weird, right? That’s like a total of 180 movies and only one got an A? (And maybe it shouldn’t have.) So is it the movies? Is it me? It’s not that I didn’t like a lot of these movies. I even liked some of them quite a bit. Maybe I’m just getting finicky in my old age. Or maybe the darkness in my soul is growing, taking over, killing off whatever remained of joy in my heart.

Or maybe it’s the movies. Yeah. It’s probably the movies.

Speaking of, here’s the list of movies I’ve seen that have come out since-ish the last Oscars (3/27/22).

61. Blonde - It's occasionally visually cool, at least. There are some neat looking shots every now and then. Other than that? This film joins Jackie and Spencer in the “various scenes from a sad famous woman’s life” genre except this one is taking it to the nth degree. It ratchets the sadness and brutality up to 11 to really drive home how terrible Marilyn Monroe’s life was, even inventing huge chunks of the story so that things can be extra sad and terrible. If, for some reason, you have interest in watching Marilyn Monroe floating through various dream states and getting tortured for almost three hours, this is your film. I don't.

60. Morbius - These Sony Spiderman villain films all have a similar issue: they can’t justify their existence. They are the remora fish to the MCU’s shark. They feel as much like a quick cash grab while you're watching them as they appear to be from the outside. Their attempts to form a connective tissue back to the MCU come across as desperate and off-putting (including and especially stuff like the mid-credit scenes in this film which are some of the most incoherent ones I’ve yet seen). The plots of the films themselves feel barely thought out. They go through the motions and then they end. There’s a lot of CGI and bad dialogue and forgettable side characters and villains along the way. At least the Venom films have Tom Hardy, whose chemistry with himself is so good you can at least enjoy that while the paper thin plot rides out the screen time. Morbius doesn’t have that. Matt Smith is having some fun but it’s not even close enough to make this something worth watching. The whole enterprise just isn’t exciting or thrilling or really any fun. It’s dull. And that’s just about the worst thing you can be as a superhero movie.

59. Bardo: False Chronicle of a Handful of Truths - There’s at least some interesting visual stuff and music going on but this is one of those movies I have a really tough time appreciating. A lot of unconnected scenes and obscured dialogue and it all means something to the filmmaker: life, death, success, art, take your pick. It’s very hard to connect to and care about. I feel like I got maybe half of it, but I won’t really understand the film until I know much more about Alejandro Iñárritu’s biography and the history of Mexico and there’s just no way in hell I’m doing homework for this. I already gave it two and a half hours of my life. That’s enough.

58. Pinocchio - I don’t have any real love for the original cartoon anyway so it’s not like this – a remake made with CGI and a handful of live action people instead of animation – didn’t already have an uphill battle with me. Even still, I went in with an open heart, allowing it to try and win me over, and I came away feeling that the whole thing seems pretty pointless. They’ve made some modern tweaks that don’t really add much. The humor is geared toward children but it’s big and broad in the way that talks down to them, like an old person trying to connect to the youth. Other than that, it seems to stick pretty close to the original cartoon's story (at least, as much as I remember the original Disney Pinocchio cartoon. It’s been a while.) The problem is, the original was made before we figured out how to write satisfying screenplays and so this remake ends up falling into the same unsatisfying plot issues. Characters pop in and out, never to be seen again. Storylines don't get wrapped up. Stuff happens to the character for a while and then it ends. People used to not care about those kinds of things because it was magical just seeing pictures that moved. These days there are a lot more options in moving pictures. Look, it might be sacrilege to say this, but you could probably show your kids this Pinocchio instead of the old one if you had to show them a Pinocchio. I’d argue there’s not a big difference because I don’t care for either. Another thing you could do, though, instead of watching a Pinocchio, is maybe just watch something better.

57. Empire of Light - The score is nice. It’s a gorgeous looking film. Roger Deakins filming lots of scenes in a grand old movie theater situated in a seaside English town? I mean, what a recipe for visual success. Unfortunately the actual plot of the film is much less interesting than its setting. It’s a fairly dull drama that doesn’t ever really feel like it gets going. Some decent acting here and there but generally pretty flat.

56. Triangle of Sadness - A black comedy satire devoid of any real humor. The jokes are all very European. Like, they’re either “this is an astute observation about the perversity of life, no?” or they’re people falling down stairs while pooping themselves (this is a mostly literal description of a huge chunk of act two). That’s basically the level of satire we’re dealing with here. It barely breaks the surface level. The whole movie is long, too. Two and a half hours, broken into three parts, the first of which (~30 minutes) seems cuttable entirely except that you need three parts to make the titular triangle. The other two segments are clanky. They never really feel like they are fully clicking. They have their moments but far from enough to cover the runtime.

55. Don’t Worry Darling - Nice music and visuals. Florence Pugh is good as she’s been in everything I’ve ever seen her in. The movie’s plot is the big problem. It spends the first 90 minutes doing quasi-interesting creepy and mysterious stuff and setting the mood and not much else, which is something you can get away with if you pay it all off with a strong finish and this film's finish is supremely weak. The twist isn’t interesting, the pacing is hurried, and the ending is abrupt. It’s extremely unsatisfying. Endings are so important in films and can make or break them and this one absolutely breaks it, making you feel like everything you watched before was just about a waste of time.

54. The Good Nurse - This is a film that feels like it worked backwards from the true story ending and didn’t have enough plot there for the first hour or so. A lot of scenes of nursing and family life. It’s pretty dull for a long while until it gets near the end, when it feels like things should finally explode with tension, and it sort of peters out. A couple of good scenes but nothing that really pops. Jessica Chastain and Eddie Redmayne are doing nice work but don’t get anything truly meaty from the script to give them that wow moment.

53. You People - It’s weirdly shot and edited like a TV show, and quality wise, that’s kind of what it feels like. Really broad characters, over-the-top situations, and dialogue that lacks all subtlety. It finds a few humorous moments but mostly it feels like watching an expensive pilot for a show that didn’t go.

52. Black Adam - It’s interesting to look at and it has a decent score. Other than that, it comes off generic and uninspired. The plot is mostly finding reasons for The Rock to smash enemies in one set piece then another. The characters are watered down versions of characters from other films and so is much of the dialogue. Nothing you’ve not seen before. Pierce Brosnan has most of the interesting character and dialogue moments in his side role. The whole thing, though better overall than Morbius, suffers from a similar problem of not really justifying its existence. It feels like it was forced into creation because The Rock wanted to be a superhero and DC figured they could sell some lunchboxes with it.

51. A Christmas Story Christmas - It certainly feels spiritually in line with the first film and if you liked the first one, I could see you getting a similar level of enjoyment out of this one. There’s at least some skill involved in not making this feel like a cheap cash grab (like I imagine A Christmas Story 2 – a direct-to-DVD sequel that came out in 2012 that I just learned of while researching this – feels like). My main problem here is that I’ve just never enjoyed the first one. I don’t have a nostalgia for that time and in fact, for reasons I can’t quite put my finger on, I find it somewhat repelling. I never found the jokes in the first one funny either, even as a kid. It always struck me as like, Dennis the Menace old comic strip type jokes that are supposed to make you scoff then shake your head while mildly chuckling. This sequel is very similar, in humor and tone. Some might like it. I don’t.

50. Amsterdam - This has all the pieces to be a fun story: interesting characters, intriguing plot idea, a great looking setting, but the movie feels wandering. Every time there’s a moment that works in comedy or plot it loses momentum almost immediately. The editing is off. Scenes linger, have very little rhythm, and create a sense of awkwardness. It feels like the material needed someone outside to take a pass at it. A rewrite by a new writer or a director with a different vision to clean things up.

49. The Bubble - Some legitimately funny bits and characters but too long and with too many stretches lacking strong laughs. Not much in terms of plot, the film is really only there to get those laughs, so it needs to bring it in the comedy sense and it doesn’t do it frequently enough.

48. RRR - I wrote my review of The Woman King (coming up shortly – that’s what they call a tease in the business) way before I watched this and inadvertently described this film in it, so let me just quickly recap (precap?) the notes from that: this is one of those foreign produced, out of control action films that clearly has some money behind it but which proves again that no matter how much money you spend, you can't buy actual quality. Big fake sets and tons of extras, extremely one-note villains, bad writing. This film is like 45 minutes of fun, inventive, supremely over the top action scenes and two hours and fifteen minutes of bad acting, clunky drama, singing, slow motion shots, piggyback rides, and friendship montages. Given what I'd heard coming in, I had hoped this was going to be an actual high quality film but if you want to get enjoyment out of it, you kind of have to watch it more like The Room (not that it’s anywhere close to that bad, but more in the sense that you have to laugh at the absurd stuff that is constantly happening). It’s kind of worth it to watch it once for the whole experience but if you can just find a Youtube compilation of highlights from the action scenes, you’ll probably have gotten enough of it.

47. Avatar: The Way of Water - Overly lonnnnnnnng. There’s maybe an hour of interesting stuff in here and two hours of James Cameron impressing himself with his world building and technology. The story is basic, the dialogue is forgettable. Filled with characters it’s hard to care about, in part because it’s hard to keep track of them – they all look the same and their accents are constantly changing – but mostly because they’re simply uninteresting. Lots of your old favorites (as much, I suppose, as characters whose names you can’t remember could be considered favorites) are back from the first film and don’t really do anything but hang out in the background while Jake’s kids take center stage and spend most of the middle of the movie doing an alien version of the film where a family moves to a new town and tries to adjust while the townies are mean to them. Then an hour and a half in, the film becomes alien Free Willy for a while, and then we get the hour long third act which is basically a repeat of the third act of the first movie but set on water. I actually hadn’t watched the first one until this year, in preparation for this sequel, and I found myself equally unimpressed by it. It's better but not particularly good. I can’t understand how three of Cameron’s most average works have taken over the highest grossing films of all time list. It’s like some kind of spell he’s placed on the world.

46. Emily the Criminal - A passable little crime… thriller? It’s not too thrilling. A crime drama mostly. There’s nothing really surprising or wholly original but it works well enough, it moves well, and then it gets out. It’s fine. Aubrey Plaza is good in it but "It's fine" is pretty much all I can muster up about this film and so that's why it's here on the list.

45. Women Talking - Women be talkin’! Miriam Toews, who wrote the novel this is based on, must have called it Women Talking in part to entrap dumb guys into making jokes, right? Pssh, if I wanted to hear women talking, I’d still be with my ex-wife! And now I got to make those jokes, but I acknowledged ahead of time they’re dumb guy jokes, so it’s fine. All of this is a great lead in for me to note that I actually didn’t care for this film. It’s more watchable than you’d expect but, ultimately, it really is just women talking. It’s not based on a play but could be converted into one with almost no changes in the script. Some pockets of good writing and acting but nothing that really elevates it beyond what its title promises and when you’re promised a film that’s only people talking, that script needs to be sharp enough to carry the entire film. It isn’t here.

44. All Quiet on the Western Front - It is what it is. It’s an objectively well-made film. Shot well, scored well, acted well. It’s just that it’s a straightforward war (or, rather, anti-war) film and… I guess I just don’t care? It doesn’t interest me to watch a two and a half hour film adaptation of an old book told without surprise or novelty. Things play out exactly as you suspect they will play out and in the end, we learn that war is bad for the people involved. Got it. Thank you. If that’s something that interests you, more power to you. It’s not something that interests me or moves me and not something I’d ever feel the need to revisit. It’s a film that will garner award talk now and then be played by substitute teachers for the next 30 years until someone remakes it again.

43. Till - Another film that’s a pretty standard fare historical drama. The story here unfolds as you’d expect, too. I will say, in fairness, with this story, it’s a little easier to forgive not experimenting with the form (versus with a hundred year old novel that’s already been adapted multiple times). If you try to get too fancy and tell these kinds of stories with a ton of flair, you risk being insensitive to the material and thus, the safest thing is to just go A>B>C. It’s fine – it tells the story cleanly and gets the point across – but it makes it into just another history class film. Danielle Deadwyler gives a good performance, asked to be either otherworldly strong or hysterically, emotionally destroyed in basically every scene in the film and she handles it well. In a way, though, it almost dehumanizes the character. Outside of a few brief moments early in the film, she gets almost no time to be anything other than a grieving mother. She comes off more as a machine built to endure rather than a person. A fault in the writing.

42. After Yang - This just feels like an A24 film. It’s almost a genre unto itself. Very artsy and contemplative and hip and indie. There's some interesting stuff here about technology and family and oh, what it means to be human! The eternal question! A beautiful score as well, which helps because with this movie, you have to enjoy the vibe more than expect, you know, actual things to happen.

41. Strange World - An inventive, interesting looking film, but a script that’s not particularly unique and not very strong in plot, dialogue, or humor. Not bad, exactly, but not good enough to really recommend.

40. Guillermo del Toro’s Pinocchio - It looks excellent and, like with all stop motion animation, you certainly find yourself impressed by the effort required to create these shots. Unfortunately it’s hard to get yourself up for another Pinocchio film. At the very least, it’s not a straightforward take on old material. They moved the story to Fascist Italy and gave the plot some sharpening. All appreciated, given what I’ve already complained about on this list with other films (other Pinocchio films, no less). Still, at the end of the day, this is a film about a wooden puppet boy who gets into misadventures and it just doesn’t speak to me.

39. Jerry and Marge Go Large - A sweet movie that falls apart about halfway through at the introduction of a super forced villain. You can almost feel the writer panicking about needing to add drama to keep the story moving. It’s kind of a shame because the movie isn’t exactly buzzing before that point – its jokes mostly fall flat – but it’s quaint enough to enjoy. Then it tries too hard and you start rolling your eyes. Bryan Cranston and Annette Bening have nice chemistry, though.

38. Rosaline - It’s cute and clever with the way it plays with the source text of Romeo and Juliet. These are the best parts of the film by far. The rest is sort of your standard romcom fare, which is just okay.

37. Fire Island - There are just too many stretches in the film without something strong in drama or comedy happening for me to really like it, but it isn’t bad. It’s a clever adaptation, with some good character beats and some funny bits.

36. The Whale - Undeniably strong performance from Brendan Fraser, full of vulnerability and heartbreak. Hong Chau is excellent as well in a supporting role. The movie itself is too play-like: full of melodrama and essentially a series of dialogues in a limited setting (this is, I believe, in part because it’s based on a play and in part because we’re meant to feel as trapped in the apartment as Fraser’s Charlie is, which is interesting in a psychological way but certainly not in a visual one). The film has a few excellent moments but otherwise, it has just two gears: mean or sad. It’s essentially 90 minutes of people having over-dramatic dialogues that end in either screaming or crying or both.

35. Lightyear - There’s a cool sci-fi/philosophical sequence that happens early in the film and which is revisited later that’s the high point for me. The rest of the film is a little paint-by-numbers sci-fi cartoon adventure which isn’t bad but also isn’t very inspired. It’s functional but doesn’t feel like Pixar’s best, given we’ve seen what they can do.

34. See How They Run - A fun little whodunit with a few genuine laughs. Saoirse Ronan is a highlight. It’s not as funny or sharp as Glass Onion (if we’re comparing comedic ensemble murder mysteries released this year) but it works and it’s enjoyable enough.

33. Confess, Fletch - A decent enough mystery and a decent enough comedy with some fun characters. Like a lot of films in this area of the list, it had room to be better in all areas but, well, it’s decent enough.

32. The Woman King - Okay, stick with me here because this is a weird comparison but this film feels like a better version of those wild straight-to-streaming action films (like RRR – that’s a callback!) with Steven Seagal or other similar washed up stars that are produced by, like, the Chinese government or a country with a lot of oil money or something. You get the big expensive looking sets and tons of extras in costumes but they still look really fake. Villains that are extremely one-note. Epic feeling stories that are generic at their core and aren’t written very well. But I say again, this film is like a better version of those types of films. The acting is decent. The action scenes are done well. But the whole thing still just feels… artificial? Like the sets and the costumes don’t feel lived-in. The villains are there to be evil and be defeated. The script feels like it’s going through the motions. This all sounds too negative. This film has some good stuff. It’s just in this uncanny valley between those awful Seagal films and better films that feel more authentic.

31. Doctor Strange in the Multiverse of Madness - Some fun imaginative beats, some interesting visual bits, a good score, and decent action scenes, but a plot that doesn’t quite get there. It feels a little loose. Set ups to get from point A to B to C aren’t strong enough and it makes things feel like they’re happening just because they’re cool to see or because they need to happen to continue moving the plot along. It weakens any emotional payoffs.

30. Lou - A solid action thriller. Serviceable in the way a lot of Liam Neeson action thrillers are: not really anything special or wholly unique but it just works. You can watch it and get what you need out of it. Allison Janney makes a surprisingly decent action star.

29. The Bob’s Burgers Movie - This film deals with the same issue The Simpsons Movie did: how do you make this feel like not just a really long episode with better animation and shading? The Simpsons Movie was able to find a way to tell a story that felt sufficiently epic, while dabbling with a bit edgier humor than the show allows. The Bob’s Burgers Movie attempted both of those things but didn’t quite get there in either sense. For fans of the show, it’s enjoyable enough, with some laughs and fun musical numbers, but it felt closer to a decent long episode than a movie experience.

28. The Menu - Well scored. A good looking film. But, as always with a black comedy, I must turn to my black comedy judgment system, which breaks down the movie into two categories. Is it black? The Menu certainly is. Is it comedy? Eh… The comedy is there, at least a little bit. A few real laughs for sure, but the whole thing is more clever than actually funny. The story mostly works though the character motivations (or lack thereof) by the third act strain belief. You sort of have to chalk it up to “well, it’s a satire so of course it’s hyper-elevated.” In that sense, it’s acceptable if not particularly satisfying.

27. Senior Year - It’s an interesting premise that doesn’t quite deliver on its promise. It struggles a bit with consistency, in tone and quality of humor. But it's not bad overall. It occasionally hits in comedy and even lands the emotional bits. It could do both better but it never goes too long without something positive. It’s not something you’d say you should go out of your way for but it’s a light, enjoyable watch.

26. The Bad Guys - Well directed. A cool animation style. The story is cute, though a little reminiscent of Zootopia (I know, I know, this film is based on a series of books, the first of which came out a year before Zootopia did. Even still.) It is very much a kid’s movie, but a well made kid’s movie nonetheless.

25. The Gray Man - It’s fun, which is kind of the main thing it needs to be. The action is particularly well done and Ryan Gosling and Chris Evans are playing their roles pitch-perfect. The dialogue, plot, music, and supporting characters, while not bad, are just too generic to really make this movie rise above the crowd. All the spies do the spy talk from every spy movie ever. The plot is a double dose of two overused secret agent movie plots: a computer drive as McGuffin and the adopted daughter that must be protected. (By the way, I had the thought: I wonder if the rise in plots where the hero must protect a child – usually a daughter/daughter figure – is because male heroes in action movies used to protect grown women but that often came across as infantilizing, so to sidestep that, producers have started going right to the source and having the heroes protect literal infants.) The series has potential though, with Gosling at its center. Its issues with genericness (? genericism? the state of being generic?) can be honed.

24. Bullet Train - Another fun action movie, in a much sillier and more comedic way. Brad Pitt is charismatic as always and a cast of good side characters – highlighted by Aaron Taylor-Johnson and Brian Tyree Henry – round it out.

23. The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent - It works well enough for being such an outlandish pitch. There are a lot of ways this film could’ve gone wrong, but it’s a clever, likable, and decently funny movie. It’s just not quite funny enough to be truly great.

22. I Love My Dad - The plot of this film is about a father who catfishes his son in an effort to get closer to him and ends up becoming his internet girlfriend and then things proceed from there. The movie is as uncomfortable as you might imagine from the pitch. If you can get past that, though, it’s actually quite a nice little film, with some laughs, good emotional notes, and solid acting performances. The biggest knock against the film is that the story does feel a little contrived at times. It’s based on a real story so I don’t know how much of the film’s beats actually occurred but there are parts where you feel like, okay, this is happening because this is a movie and things need to happen to move the plot along. It’s still pretty good, even with the parts that feel moviefied.

21. White Noise - The film has a deliberately strange rhythm and sense of weirdness to it that I can see turning people off but I actually found myself really enjoying it. It’s an often funny and insightful film about fear and mortality and loss of control. It’s better in the first half and loses a little steam in the second but overall I found it quite intriguing. Really good acting from Adam Driver in the lead role.

20. Uncharted - Tom Holland is very charming and he and Mark Wahlberg have an easy chemistry. The action scenes have the right energy to them and the treasure hunting, mystery solving stuff works well, too. There are good bits of humor and fun locales. It doesn’t quite capture the magic of the games and certainly has its clichés, but the film generally does most things well, moves swiftly, and is out in under two hours. That’s a well executed film in my eyes.

19. The Sea Beast - A great looking animated film. Well directed, solid action scenes, creative world design, and it tells a nice story. Nothing for me that makes it really transcend being a very good kid's movie, but no shame in being just that.

18. Chip 'n Dale: Rescue Rangers - Very clever, very meta with some solid laughs. There are obvious comparisons here to Who Framed Roger Rabbit? It’s been a while since I’ve seen that film but I recall it leaning more into the noir and mystery aspects while this movie is really more about the jokes and references. While it can be almost too meta at times, most of those references do work and make it a fun watch full of Easter eggs.

17. Weird: The Al Yankovic Story - Relentlessly silly. A very funny parody with solid jokes, a good flow, and some really fun cameos.

16. Black Panther: Wakanda Forever - It’s sort of wild (or perhaps not really, given it’s the same creative team) but comparing my review for the first Black Panther film with my notes for this one, I'm seeing myself hitting many of the same beats. Issues: the action scenes aren’t great – often too hard to follow and overly CGI’d. Also, a lot of the scenes are really dark, with the night scenes and underwater scenes being especially hard to see. (It’s particularly disappointing in the underwater scenes because I’d like to have had a better picture of Namor’s kingdom.) Similar pluses though, too: set design, costumes, music are all excellent. The acting is strong (Angela Bassett is getting all the raves, and she’s good, especially in her big monologue scene where she really gets to lay it all out there, but I actually think Danai Gurira delivers the best performance as the wounded general Okoye). The film is overstuffed though, which is a problem the first one didn’t have. It’s a good entry to the MCU but slightly below its predecessor.

15. Tár - Well directed, excellently written. The detail in the dialogue is so strong and the script doesn’t really bother to help you out. These characters are people at the top of their game and speak like that. It’s laudable even if it creates separation from the material. Cate Blanchett is incredible here. She fully embodies this complex genius and makes it seem effortless. The way she speaks and moves is so natural you wouldn’t question if Lydia Tár was a real person. There’s a lot going on in the film itself. Interesting topics broached. Somewhat deliberately paced for the first two acts and then kicks into another gear as everything comes towards the conclusion. It’s somewhat difficult to fully parse it. Maybe it’s just a little rushed, maybe it’s an unreliable narrator thing. I’m not sure how many concrete answers are in the film itself. I think I appreciated the first two acts much more but the whole film is a well done character piece.

14. Dinner in America - Sort of a punk rock Napoleon Dynamite. Less weird, a little more edgy, but similar small town weirdos vibes. Moves well, has some laughs, and features a couple of great performances from the two leads: Kyle Gallner and Emily Skeggs.

13. Elvis - It’s pretty good for a music biopic. The first half is edited like a montage, which I surprisingly liked. It just doesn’t stop moving, but it actually kind of works for the carnival ride vision of Elvis’ life that Baz Luhrmann is presenting. I enjoyed it better than the second half which slows down considerably. It’s too long overall but there is a lot of good stuff in it: acting, singing, music, visual style. Austin Butler is very good.

12. The Batman - Visually impressive, decently plotted though it does have some wonkiness. It is far too long, though. Part of this is that some scenes, which are mostly expository, just drag and could be edited down. Part of it is, in seeking to create a vibe, the film lingers. Lots of pieces that breathe and breathe and breathe, that don’t really advance the plot but are just to create mood. It’s successful, at least, in creating that mood: sufficiently creepy and unsettling at times, brooding and mysterious. But you still don’t ever want to be watching a superhero movie and wondering how much longer. You could cut maybe an hour from the film and you’d lose some of that but probably have a better overall product.

11. Good Luck to You, Leo Grande - A charming film. It’s almost entirely a series of dialogues in a hotel room and, despite that, it works. It’s not exactly visually interesting but it doesn’t lull because of a really strong script, which is what you need if you’re going to make a movie that’s basically set in a box. It also helps when the acting is great and the two leads here are great. Emma Thompson is fantastic and Daryl McCormack holds his own with a screen legend.

10. Hustle - Light, funny, endearing. It’s a little simplistic and paint-by-numbers-y, but it moves well and hits all the right notes along the way. It has authenticity, which is rare in a sports movie, and you can feel it and it makes it work better. Decent enough acting and writing. A good watch.

9. Bros - A really sharply written, well done romcom. It does a good job of toeing the line between acknowledging that what it’s doing is different while still being generally a fairly conventional romcom and hitting all those right genre notes.

8. Top Gun: Maverick - It probably got caught up in too much hype but it is a really well executed summer blockbuster. It knows what it is and it just nails it. Fantastic action scenes and just enough quality in character and dialogue to make it a thrilling and fun film that never drags.

7. Living - Looks great, sounds good. This is one of those films that just surprises you. It seems a little dull from the outside (and it’s certainly no Top Gun inside) but it really is a beautiful, delightful film. Very understated. A simple story told well. Some tremendous acting from Bill Nighy but the whole cast does a good job and several people have standout moments.

6. Thor: Love and Thunder - It’s not quite up to the level of Ragnarok (it’s missing a certain epicness that makes it feel truly impactful like that film was) but it’s very funny and surprisingly emotional. Great action and music, often perfectly intertwined. Christian Bale does an excellent job with the villain role: terrifying and tragic (but maybe too good a job – you almost want to tell him to chill and have some more fun). I love that Taika Waititi has carved out his own little unique and weird corner of the MCU.

5. Glass Onion - It does some things better than the first. The characters are amped up, for one, which I think works better for what the series is. Plus, it’s funnier. I did feel like the central mystery was worse, though. It’s intriguing as you watch it but when all is said and done, not as satisfying a conclusion. Overall, though, really well done. And, perhaps more importantly, it's just fun. It's fun to be in the middle of a mystery with all these actors playing big characters and the great score playing and the jokes flying. It's another good entry in what's shaping up to be a really enjoyable film series.

4. The Banshees of Inisherin - Wikipedia lists it as a “black tragicomedy” which is so specific and yet apt. Very funny at times. Very tragic at times. Strong writing, touching on subjects all the way from the difficulties of feeling trapped to the madness of civil war. Subtle and layered. Excellent acting all around, too. Colin Farrell, Brendan Gleeson, Barry Keoghan, and Kerry Condon are all doing plus work here.

3. Babylon - This film does a few things that generally rub me the wrong way with films. It’s long. It’s overindulgent. But you know what? I kind of loved it. Despite its three hour runtime, it doesn’t really drag until near the very end. It has a rhythm to it and a beat. It speeds up then slows down, speeds up, slows down, but it never really stops. It’s kind of exhausting and honestly impressive. Great visuals, great music. Excellent acting performances from Brad Pitt, Margot Robbie, Diego Calva, and Jean Smart. Poignant, funny, and really good at capturing chaos.

2. Everything Everywhere All at Once - I really wanted to love this one just a little more. To get it to that A grade. I’ve flipped it with the film that’s at number one on the list a few times but I’m settling with it here because I just… I wish someone could’ve talked the writer/director team, the Daniels, out of their basest instincts. This is a truly brilliant film about finding meaning in life versus giving into nihilism and it’s also about pee pee and poo poo. It’s an absolutely beautiful film about family, marriage, immigrants and also it’s about how butt plugs are funny! They go into the butt! That’s where the poo poo is! Look, I love stupid humor when it’s applied right, but so much of it here comes across as lol so random jokes. And it sucks because this film absolutely doesn’t need it. The film is already a dramedy. It already has some funny stuff in it. Enough funny stuff to count as a part-comedy, at least, and fulfill the comedy quotient of the dramedy equation. The juvenile stuff adds no real laughs to the film and pulls me right out of it. It adds a barrier to the emotional stakes because it raises my cynical walls. All of this is overly negative. 95% of the film really, really works. (I’m aware that a 95% is an A, not an A-. Art, not science.) The directing, editing, most of the writing. All great. Absolutely superb acting performances from Michelle Yeoh, Stephanie Hsu, Ke Huy Quan, and Jamie Lee Curtis. It’s just that cringe-inducing last 5% of the film. I think if someone took a pass at the screenplay and removed all the bits that a 13 year old boy would’ve put in, this film would be an all-timer for me. As is, it’s one of my favorites of the year but that’s probably it.

1. The Fabelmans - Touching, sad, uplifting, and funny as well. The stuff about movies and art is really wonderful. If there’s any knock, it’s that the family stuff, while mostly well done, comes off a bit too melodramatic or cheesy at times. (This is the 5% of the film that doesn’t work for me here, but it’s something I’m more neutral about versus something that’s actively repelling me.) Altogether a great film, though. Visually, musically. Excellent acting performances from Michelle Williams, Paul Dano, Gabriel LaBelle, and Judd Hirsch in a slightly larger than a cameo role. Plus, one of the best endings to a film this year. Without spoiling too much, there’s a great scene with another cameo right near the end that’s so good and which leads to a final shot that’s so simple but says so much. It’s the perfect bow on a terrific package.

Okay, time for some individual awards.

Best Actor

5. Austin Butler, Elvis 4. Adam Driver, White Noise 3. Brendan Fraser, The Whale 2. Bill Nighy, Living 1. Colin Farrell, The Banshees of Inisherin

Best Actress

5. Margot Robbie, Babylon 4. Michelle Williams, The Fabelmans 3. Emma Thompson, Good Luck to You, Leo Grande 2. Michelle Yeoh, Everything Everywhere All at Once 1. Cate Blanchett, Tár

Best Supporting Actor

5. Brad Pitt, Babylon 4. Brendan Gleeson, The Banshees of Inisherin 3. Paul Dano, The Fabelmans 2. Barry Keoghan, The Banshees of Inisherin 1. Ke Huy Quan, Everything Everywhere All at Once

Best Supporting Actress

5. Jean Smart, Babylon 4. Hong Chau, The Whale 3. Jamie Lee Curtis, Everything Everywhere All at Once 2. Kerry Condon, The Banshees of Inisherin 1. Stephanie Hsu, Everything Everywhere All at Once

Best Directing

5. Joseph Kosinski, Top Gun: Maverick 4. Martin McDonagh, The Banshees of Inisherin 3. Steven Spielberg, The Fabelmans 2. Daniel Kwan and Daniel Scheinert, Everything Everywhere All at Once 1. Damien Chazelle, Babylon

Best Screenplay

5. Kazuo Ishiguro, Living 4. Damien Chazelle, Babylon 3. Steven Spielberg and Tony Kushner, The Fabelmans 2. Todd Field, Tár 1. Martin McDonagh, The Banshees of Inisherin

And now to look at this year’s version of this monstrosity a.k.a. the web of actors who I’ve seen in multiple projects this year:

I need to come up with new ways to say things are good. I try to write like I speak so then when I start describing stuff as superb and terrific because I get self-conscious about seeing “good” in review after review, I feel uncomfortable because I don’t use those words in real life. And then I open up the thesaurus and take a peek at alternatives and they are even worse. You’re not going to catch me describing something as “cracking”. No sir.

Might try working “fabulous” into my everyday vocabulary more so I feel more free to use it on next year’s list.

Anyway, enjoy the Oscars.

- - - - -

Read More:

Annual Lists of Movies I Saw the Past Year

[miss-elinor-marye]

How can one not give into temptation and not flirt with a genius physicist? Elinor always was attracted to men with big and powerful... brains. Just like Dr. Octopus. And on top of that, he's really charismatic and with those four metallic tentacle manipulators... You'd always wonder what else he's capable of.

Kudos to ChizuPS for this wonderful artwork

[cypaira-the-skeleton]

😏

here, have some more of this dude

[oneshot-wxnderland]

Lab Partners With Benefits Pt. 3 | Percy Jackson

Summary: Another week, another lab and Y/n and Percy are feeling a different kind of tension this time.

Category: fluff 

Part 1 | Part 2

–––––––––––––––––––

          Percy had been kicking himself all week. He had forgotten to ask you for your number before you left his place and now you probably thought he was just some asshole looking for a one-time hookup. And he didn’t want that. And he hoped you didn’t want that either. But he wasn’t really sure what he wanted. 

         It’d been a hot minute since Percy was in any kind of relationship and he wasn’t sure if he was even the relationship kind. Even if he did want to be, his life just didn’t lend itself to dating mortals. There was always some monster popping up that he’d have to fight, or quest he’d have to go on, or emergency at camp he’d have to run off to, and Percy was a shit liar. It’s what messed up the last time he’d tried to date somebody. He was constantly blowing off dates and rain-checking everything because the gods are needy attention seekers. 

          He’d seen superhero movies before and related a lot to when they had similar issues. Percy’s not saying he’s Spiderman or anything, but he does live in New York and save it from constant peril – so yeah, he’s Spiderman. 

          This time, however, he was really considering trying again. Trying with you. And Percy had a plan. 

          Sliding into his seat when there were only a few other people in the room yet, Percy felt pumped up. He woke up early, showered, had a FaceTime with the boys to discuss the game plan, and got to class ahead of you so that he was ready to give you his number the first chance he got before he lost his nerve. That was part of Jason’s advice: offer his number to you instead of asking for yours. He claimed it would make Percy come off more vulnerable and less pushy. Leo mostly just spouted different cheesy lines that Percy would never use. Frank didn’t say much but Hazel piped in every now and then when she took the phone from him. 

          “So, you’re lab partners,” Hazel started. “Do you talk outside of your lab?”

          “No, that’s why I need her number.”

          “But you said you did homework together at your place right? So how’d that go? Did she seem interested?”

          Percy paused. 

          “Yeah, it went... fine.”

          Hazel was blissfully unaware of the blush that was creeping up his neck but Jason didn’t miss it. Or the way he suddenly needed to roll up his sleeves and fiddle with them. 

          “Did you just do the homework?” Jason asked suspiciously. 

          “We uh... kissed...” 

          “Niiiiiicee, Percy!” Leo hollered. “That’s my boy!”

          Frank retook the phone from Hazel and hastily gave an excuse to go before leaving the call and cutting off Hazel’s confused protests.

          “I don’t know what to tell you, man,” Jason shook his head. “This is way beyond my level now. Piper and Annabeth are nearby I’ll go get them-.”

          “No!” Percy cut him off. That’s the last thing he wanted. The girl’s won’t know or care what to do so they’d ask Piper’s siblings and then the entirety of camp would know. “It doesn’t really change anything. I’m going to give her my number and then the ball’s in her court and I don’t have to worry about it.”

          “But your balls were in her court, weren’t they Percy.” 

          “Leo I am going to kill you when I get back to camp and that is a threat.”

          Leo left the call.

          “I’m sure it’ll be fine, just don’t do your game-time face because it’ll scare her off,” Jason tried to get the conversation back on track.

          “What face? I don’t have a scary face?” Percy added another item to the list of things to not do when he saw her.

          “Yes you do. It’s when you’re charging into battle but this isn’t battle is it Percy?” 

          “You’re lucky,” Percy lamented while he grabbed his backpack. “You just woke up and were already with Piper. All the hard work done for you.” 

          “You got this man, just be yourself.” 

          Percy decided to throw that particular bit of garbage advice away. 

          Now he was sitting in his seat, got there early, and he was even wearing his nice t-shirt, so what could go wrong.

          As soon as you walked in the door all of his carefully curated bravado deflated inside of him. You walked towards your shared table and he had to expel childish nerves he hadn’t felt in years. He’s in college now, for Hades’ sake. He was a man.

          “Hey,” you greeted as you sat down.

          “Hi.” That was stupid. Men don’t say ‘hi’. He should’ve said ‘hey’ back.

          “You’re here early,” you commented and Percy just nodded like an idiot. 

          The plan was to giver you his number as soon as he saw you, but he couldn’t just blurt that out of nowhere. 

          “How’ve you been?” 

          There. Establishing a conversation and definitely not stalling.

          “I’ve been good.” The small amused smile on your face calmed him down a little. He’s got this.

          Class started before he could slip his number in casually but Percy wasn’t deterred. He wasn’t going to let geology get in his way.

                    While you were reading the data you had to chart on the graph, you noticed Percy’s usual fidgeting get even worse. Glancing at him from the corner of your eye, you saw him concentrating intensely on the paper and trying to contain his frustration. You recognized the signs since one of your friends has dyslexia, but you knew he wouldn’t ask for help.

          “So we have to plot the points on the graph and then draw the elevation lines, right?” You asked casually, looking over to him for confirmation. He nodded his head, but still continued to squint at the numbers which all were very small print and close to each other.

         Muttering the numbers as if to yourself but loud enough for him to hear, you got to work. 

          Percy sat back and smiled a little, knowing what you were doing. He looked over at you, from your furrowed brow to your crossed legs bouncing with your tapping foot. With a contented sigh, he recalled what it felt like to be in between those legs. Having them wrapped around his hips while you moaned his name. 

          His eyes trailed up your body, memories that were attached to each part flooding through him like a highlight reel of his deepest fantasies. Then he got to your bare arms and the goosebumps on the skin shook him out of it.

          “Cold?” he asked, interrupting you trying to help him which he really should have been listening to. 

          “Yeah, a little.” 

          “Here.” Percy shrugged off his hoodie and held it out to you before pausing (and slightly panicking.)

          Hold up, is this weird? Am I being weird right now? Should giving her my hoodie come before or after we exchange numbers? I guess doing it before could be a good test of whether she would be interested in exchanging numbers. But this is couple stuff. Her wearing my hoodie. That usually comes after numbers. But she’s cold now and I can’t seem like an asshole withholding warmth unless she accepts or declines my number. 

           Luckily, you didn’t seem to notice his panic as you took the hoodie from him without hesitation and put it on. “Thanks.”

          He calmed down as he watched you roll up the sleeves so that your hands were free to work and he felt a different kind of warmth spread through him. He liked the way you looked in his hoodie. 

          You caught him watching you and it threw you off. This wasn’t the heated gaze that had made you melt before, this was... softer. But the moment was ruined when you glanced down and saw that he hadn’t drawn a single point yet.

          “Hey,” you tapped your pencil on his paper. “Focus.”

          “Sorry.”

          You worked well together for a while. The rhythm of plotting points distracted Percy from his nerves. That is until he felt your hand on his forearm.

          “What’s this?” You asked, finger tracing the SPQR of his tattoo and making him shiver.

          “Oh, it’s a band.” 

          “What band?”

          “The Super Popular... Cool Rockers.”

          “They spell Cool with a Q?”

          “That’s what makes it cool.”

          “Ah.”

          Percy went back to the worksheet, congratulating himself on his quick thinking when he saw you pull out your phone. 

          “What are you doing?” he asked, totally nonchalant. 

          “Looking up the Super Popular Qool Rockers.”

          Percy snatched your phone. 

          “Oh, you won’t find them.” He dodged your attempts to grab it. “They’re really underground.”

          “You’ll be really underground if you don’t give me my phone back.” Percy hastily returned your phone, as if the threat scared him. You tried to glare at him, but found it too hard to suppress your smile once his broke out. “Thank you. Now will you tell me what it really means?”

          “Maybe one day.” People started packing their things and leaving since class had flown by faster than Percy liked. Sensing his window of opportunity closing he decided to Hades with it. “Depends if you go on a date with me.”

          You took your time standing up and gathering your things while pretending to mull it over in your head. Which Percy really did not appreciate. 

          “Maybe one day,” you answered him with a coquettish smile and took a few steps towards the door. “Well, aren’t you coming?”

          Percy was too concentrated on restraining a fist pump to puzzle out your meaning. 

          “We didn’t get much work done today, so we better finish what we started at your place.” You winked at him and strided out the door.

          With a mischievous grin, Percy was quick to follow. 

[thatdude-noah]

my unhinged thoughts on spiderman no way home in three parts (spoiler warning)

tbh only the second is directly a thought about nwh, the other is just my unfiltered thoughts about spiderman as a whole

also each section has a little synopsis at the end :]

1. tobey maguire

2. mcu spiderman evolution

3. the quote

1. tobey maguire

i love tobey's spiderman. i grew up on it, watched his films religiously (aside from the third one which i only watched one or two times before i decided it was okay to ignore). i think tobey did a great job playing the role.

however.

i think everybody bases their opinion on spiderman media based off of tobey's spiderman, especially people who don't read comics (which is most people if we're being honest). tobey's spiderman, while still fantastic, i feel isn't a fully accurate portrayal of peter parker.

peter parker isn't a total nerd, he doesn't get insanely bullied - hell, he's dated multiple very attractive women, and even dated two at the same time !! peter parker is a bit of a nerd, sure, but he's not a freak. he's more of like,,,a lone wolf type. he doesn't even consider flash his bully or enemy (i don't quite remember how he referred to flash, but it wasn't in any negative connotation).

tobey's peter is a nerd. he's kinda weird and awkward and he gets bullied. and obviously that's not tobey's fault, he was just playing the character how he was written, and i think he did a great job. but i don't think his character should be the end-all for peter parker's. i think, while he did a great job on his role, it isn't the only way to perceive spiderman.

i think tobey's movies shaped a lot of people's views on spiderman and still impact them. so many people grew up on him and are devoted to him. i think this makes people look down on andrew garfield or even tom holland, at least a little. and if they don't, their biases from growing up on tobey maguire still impacts the way they perceive and discuss the other spidermen.

so - i think tobey maguire played a great spiderman and peter parker, but i don't think he's like. the ultimate spider-man. peter parker should change with time, and we should accept that tobey's spiderman isn't the most perfect depiction of him.

2. mcu spiderman evolution

i am also guilty of being partial to tobey maguire because i grew up on his movies. however. i think mcu peter parker had the potential to be one of, if not the best peter parker and spiderman stories out there.

i love the original, basic story line for peter parker (uncle ben, great power great responsibility, poor kid in ny, etc etc) but i think what the mcu set up is beautiful and fixes many of the complaints people previously had about mcu peter parker.

in the mcu, from the moment we met spiderman, he wasn't just a poor kid from new york. yeah, he still wasn't well off, and he was still living with his aunt, but we have no mention of his parents or uncle ben - we don't know spiderman's origin story. and, in addition to all that, he has access to incredible tech and nearly all the help he needs through tony stark.

i absolutely adore mcu peter parker and his relationship with tony stark. i think what was set up was beautiful and i still love the story line. however, it does mean that mcu peter parker is fundamentally different from the other peter parker's that we know.

and then. no way home happens.

i think it's beautiful. aunt may's death is more impactful (to me, at least) than any uncle ben's death was because we had more connection to her, we knew and loved her as a character. she was more than just a plot device, which i feel uncle ben often is. she is peter's origin story, she is his motivation. peter stands for the same thing aunt may stood for because her sacrifice and love meant so much to him and impacted him so much.

so now, we have the origin story. one that (again, to me) may be even more impactful than the original uncle ben story line. and then when we get to the end of no way home, peter doesn't have anything that he had at the beginning of the mcu franchise. he doesn't have tony stark, his tech, or his money. he doesn't have aunt may or his friends. he is just a poor teenager living in new york with motivation and determination. that is the peter parker we love and know, through and through.

so - mcu fixed their original "flaws" in their peter parker and gave us a story that might have more meaning than the classic story we are often given with peter parker

3. the quote

so. the quote.

it was finally said in the mcu and finally gave peter the motivation and origin we needed.

except. it was a little different.

the quote originally from the comics was "with great power, there must also come great responsibility." however, this is often misquoted (which it was in both tobey and andrew's movies) as "with great power, comes great responsibility."

while the second one is smoother and flows off the tongue a bit easier, i think the first one is more impactful and a bit more accurate. the second one says that the responsibility comes with the power, but the first one says that with the power, you must also have great responsibility. while a small difference, the difference is still there.

let me break it down a little.

"with great power, comes great responsibility" - when you have great power, you will have great responsibility. when you have power, you have responsibility. with power, you become responsible.

except that's the problem. so many people with great power aren't responsible, and that's where so many problems are. they have responsibility to be good to the people - that's a choice they can make, sure, but they've never given themselves that responsibility. for example, in no way home - peter was not responsible for sending the villains home safely. but he chose to do so. he chose to give himself that responsibility because of the power he had.

"with great power, there must also come great responsibility" - when you have power, you must give yourself responsibility. with power, you must gain responsibility.

this is far more accurate and far more impactful to peter's story. as stated before - peter doesn't have to be responsible. he doesn't have to be a good guy and give himself these responsibilities. but he chooses to. he chooses to because he knows the power he has, and he knows the impact he has.

so - while i think the misquoted line is still important and impactful, i think it's slightly less impactful than the original line. i am glad that mcu spiderman heard the original line and i think it better reflects his character and the choices he faces.

[wack-ashimself]

'The Batman' or as I call it...

'Is there a real difference between emo and goth? That will be a highly covered topic in this unneeded POS.'

Sure, Farrel as the penguin was nice, but being he has little real screen time, no real character development (like everyone in the movie) you just are watching the best version of a live penguin (that stays closer to the gangster element).

You ever watch a movie and go 'this is not bad, but in no form was it one of the better movies, I'll forget it in a year or two, and it cost HOW MUCH to make?!'

It met expectations, but then stopped as soon as it did.

It's just so fucking drawn out, and 2 of the biggest plot holes are right in your face. Spoilers.

1-the bat signal. IMMEDIATELY after knocking out gordan, they meet on the building with the GIANT BAT LAMP!? NO cops thought 'I wonder if batman is gonna be nearby the THING THAT CALLS BATMAN THAT WAS JUST TURNED ON?!'

2-the riddler's writing is extremely noticeable. Alfred's seen ALL the evidence of the riddler. ...still opens the package with his DISTINCT style of writing covering it because....? BECAUSE....?

Ugh. And do not even get me started on catwoman. Great acting, great fights...and carried all the scenes where robbie boy decides to take his twilight character and meet michael keaton's batman...but their forced 'love' connection felt nothing but filler. And like this movie: unneeded (her fight scenes were much cooler than batman's on average tho).

I'll give you it was probably the most REALISTIC batman, but who the fuck cares? It was boring most times. Outside of figuring out the ridder's clues/backstory, nothing in this movie evolves or matters.

5.9/10. Yeah, I'd rather rewatch the BAD batman movies. They at least were bright and colorful.

ps-best part? The chase scene with the penguin. It's way more bad ass than the trailer. But not much else was.

Side note : I think the main reason above all this movie was a disappointment story wise was because if you watched all the batman movies, video games (tell tale-this was basically STOLEN DIRECTLY from their batman game), shows, specials (real and animated) this was like a frankenstein's monster of like...3 of those combined, so you kinda saw most of it coming. Even if you weren't a comic book fan: you KNEW most of this story. 1-the waynes being dirty. 2-mob and wayne's ties. 3-mob controlling the cops. These were totally all done before on some level. So if anything it was just the real life version of a cartoon they already did. Kinda like spiderman no way home was a knockoff of their own animated movie's story (spiderverse)...god forbid originality comes to play. Then ending it with catwoman and batman doing a paul walker fast and furious drive off? That's it. Everything has been done before. We're just recycling everything forever. Amazing. Fuck hollywood.

pps-no sequel. I do not care. Rob was so bland, like the movie, and nothing felt meaningful. Know when you eat something and it leaves a bad taste in your mouth? Well, that was this, but with NO taste. I didn't even know I ate something. It was like water. An ice cube.

[lampoest]

Unfiltered thoughts watching mission impossible rouge nation inspired by @chaotically-cas

(sorry its so long my brain is all over the place)

this is also part 14 of me watching it every day :/

CURSING WARNING !! ALSO SPOILERS !!!

why is brandt first to speak

starting out with "shit" good call benji

brandt man we get the package is on the mcfucking plane

badass luther 10/10

nervous benji 10/10

that one sound effects sounds like the discord notif

why he in a fancy suit

*jumps on a plane with almost no plan on getting inside*

why did tom cruise think this was agood idea?

but like why would benji even open the ramp?

how is he not winded from that?

classic ethan

THE INTRO 1000/10

SOLOMON LANE !!

wait you can already see lane in the record shop.

how do they tell the agents these little convos?

also damn way to give it away

what if someone just looked in that room and saw the secret message?

also how did the disc get changed? because the imf definitely didnt make that

and how did lane know where he was going?

speaking of lane---

dang that man is pretty

he always sets guns down carefully

i can only see alec baldwin as trump from his snl skits so i dont take hunley seriously ;-;

damn brandt needs to step it up. man keeps letting himself be inturrupted

bruh the imf is only luck

why did no one resrict his legs?

also why is janik such an asshole?

dang she cool !!

why does it take janik so long to get that gun?

bravo-echo 1-1

this man is bleeding but decided instead of taking care of his wound he calls brandt.

i like how you actually see ethan worried and confused trying to plan his next moves. he is rarely caught off guard so it's refreshing to see his more human side

hunley spitting accusations damn bro

also a big fuck you from ethan to hunley

dang ethan is good

brandts little hidden smile

and ethan leaving trails

bitch how you sketch that good???

STAN BENJI !!

youve won, your way out of a job

benji is good

my little brandt x benji shipper in me is happy

simon pegg is such a good actor

the first time i saw this i was like: aww noooo

all dunn with that

TO THE OPERA !!!

TUX BENJI TUX BENJI

i cant tell if that was ethan

it just looks like youre talking to yourself thats more sus than using a phone

want drama? go to the opera

ok but like if you look like that im sorry you are a bad guy. thats like a stereotypical bad guy face

benji-

you can see ethan in the background of that scene

flute gun flute gun

oh no benji is in the closet. dont worry man we love you

if i were there and i just had a good vantage point i could find lane in an instant

ooh ilsa pretty

pipe gun

also pamphlet computer

those key things are cool and plausible

spiderman spiderman does whatever, ethan hunt can?

a W O M A N

what W O M A N?

reminds me of a marshmallow gun i made out if pvc pipes.

why does she not put that thing back?

also the dude loads it and then later it is unloaded

dang that guy is pretty tall.

ethan is so tiny

dis bitch is like uhh gimmie a sec to catch my breath mate

why he only dropkick people?

only 30 mins in ?!?!

the cinematography is exquisite

yes benji goin sicko mode

*gets shot* just a flesh wound

bruh i would've been so startled at that

i love how confused he is at that

ilsa saves ethan once again

they did this on the first day of filming

skdjs

ah yes random package in car = not bomb totally

if she tried to shoot benji then yes she is a bad person

but she didnt try to, she could've easily but didn't

benji being paranoid

she could just say the dude's name

benji being scared

hunley jumping to conclusions

brandt actually cares yeey

why di they approach from different sides of the street they were in the same car.

benji was far away from the sparks why he flinch?

friendship goals

oop plot dump that only mission impossible can get away with

ok...

why this mf's voice so smooth

lane is struggling with chopsticks

also lane :))))

ive chocked on my water so many times watching this scene

lanes voice :))))))

SHE RUINED HIS SUSHI WHAT THE FUCK ILSA

this man dont know what personal space is

gotta look up these peeps mbti types

casablanca references

also benji is wearing dollar store lookin glasses while ethan is wearing some fancy glasses

luther is top notch

as much as i dont like jeremy renner he delivers these lines really well

because atlee is a bitch

oh honey please, impossible is a walk in the park

benji just wants to wear a mask

id be so nervous walking through those

yes...

personal wellbeing who?

why not bring a plastic bottle full of air?

tom cruise can hold his breath for 6 minutes and he learned to do so for that scene

luther big brain

damn cctv

why did they need to break in while benji was going in?

das sus but ok

also isnt et voila french?

she just randomly tapping the ipad

benji being stressed

if he missed the exact center

i want one of those to open my locker's lock

if he just went with the current and didnt try to force his way against the water ilsa wouldn't have had to save him

imagine if he put the wrong one in-

she is breathing heavily to over saturate her body with oxygen so she can hold her breath longer

see ilsa makes it out without well and she went with the current

BENJI'S OUTFIT YESSS :))))))

no you didn't

you gave her a false sense of security

ethan's confused face for the next like 10 mins is great

liar

why does that one man look like sean ambrose?

parkour

skdjdksjdjdkfjs

the facial acting in this

STAIRS STAIRS STAIRS

the glare yesss

vrrrm vrrm

hey its you !

drivin like a grandma

shit !

benji just screaming

im convinced that ethan is indestructible

no you didn't survive that

bonk

dskfh

ethan didnt just-

also why didnt benji just tell ethan he made a copy ???

dont shoot and drive kids

high speed motorcycle chase with no helmet or leather. tom cruise, how?

i wanna learn how to drive a motorcycle

HOW THE FUCK IS HE NOT DEAD YET ?!?!

the lighting

ofc brandt would be the person why sits backwards on a chair. fkn bi vibes

benji to the rescue

fuck off atlee

i am so proud of us ...

the lines are done so well here

benji lookin like how i look when my parents argue

YES THIS SCENE

LANE LANE LANE LANE LANE

im too fucking gay for this movie-

once again no personal space

*inhales* :))))))))))))))

ive like memorized the entire script of this including the music

1 man performance of m:i5 ???

benji's outfit

also i love how youre able to see the characters in the background. props for the attention to detail

i need that haircut because his hair is lookin A+

fuck you atlee

ilsa spitting straight facts

uhh ilsa he still loves julia

NO BENJI NOOOO

EW FUCK OFF JANIK NO ONE LIKES YOU

speak of the devil-

betrayal--

WOULDNT YOU LIKE TO KNOW WEATHER BOY !??

actin sus

BENJI LANE BENJI LANE

his posture shdhskhsj (i cant be talking though)

0 personal space whatsoever

why does everyone have the same haircut in this???

simon mcburney pretending to be hunt prentending to be atlee

manipulation !?

the syndicate you say ? i know a thing or two about them 😼😼😼

damn though renner delivers these lines really well

a black tie? how informal. ..

complimenting hunt right infront of him

but he really didnt

i never realized that they were on the clock for this

huh...

the lil head nod though-

HAHA YEAH FUCK YOU ATLEE

is it bad that i hate atlee more than i hate lane?

ethan big smart wrinkle brain

janik just reading a fucking magazine

ethan has a photographic memory

oh look its benji :)))

lane :))))

ethan being tough

it must be aquward to get the low angle shots

lane is running out the clock to put pressure on ethan hmmm big brain

it isnt working though :\

damn he so cocky that hes telling the villain his plan

ill give you 1/5 of the money you wanted to get my bf back

ok but like does tom cruise just not age?

kill the woman

ugh i hate janik

the trust that is shown between those two is great

yes the score and the chase are so great

also this man really hates windows for some reason

fuck off janik

sneaky sneaky

EYY ITS LANE !!!

yeyy janik is dead

once again dodging bullets and hating glass

couldve killed him but needed him alive

the glass box

badass ethan

all the pretty men assembled

lane really let himself go aster this

dang though lane is my favorite villain ever

i like how for once the girl and the guy just are friends instead of romantically involved

eyy the callbacks to how the movie started.

welcome to the imf

[sparrowmoth]

So I saw the new Cruella movie and I totally understand not wanting to pay money to see it, but honestly it wasn't that bad, lol. At least, not like I expected it to be after reading the post you reblogged, I enjoyed it and Emma Stone played her well. It's just definitely not a Cruella that's going to grow up and eventually murder puppies

@shinycharmblogs I've read the spoilers on Tumblr by this point, so I get that! I'm glad they didn't go the route everyone was expecting. I still find the "dalmatians killed my mom" plot kind of hilarious ngl, and yeah, no way I'm paying to watch that, but good to know it's not a complete dumpster fire! I assume it'll be entertaining. I'm planning to watch it with @fuck-you-i-am-spiderman pretty soon, so I shall reserve my honest opinion until then! ♥️