#yeah I'm cooking that
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yes & no by Natalie Wee | Trigun Ultimate Overhaul
#THIS HAS BEEN COOKING. FOR TWO MONTHS#trigun#vashwood#vash the stampede#nicholas d. wolfwood#vash#wolfwood#trigun maximum#mine#edit#trimax#trigun edit#tw suicide mention#for that one line#and#tw blood#hopefully there's nothing else I'm forgetting#long post#i guess#pls feel free to critique me on the alt texts I've never done it before and would love to know what I can do better#but uhhh yeah otherwise. enjoy my baby. I'm very proud of this#I do however need to not look at it for a while now#so aside from the IDs if there are mistakes. no there aren't <3#AND THANKS TO MY QPP EEE FOR LISTENING TO ME ENDLESSLY WORK ON THIS AND OFFERING ME INPUT AND CRITIGUE!!! <3333#god. it's finally done#edit: btw I could write so much on my choices in this and what I'm going for and little details. but I leave it to the masses to interpret
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I need the pokemas anniversary to come soon so we can hopefully see volo go batshit crazy again for the second time!!!
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#please please please give us a volo and giratina alt I BEG YOUUUU @ pokemas writers and devs 😭😭😭😭😭#his expression range is INSANE like. how can he look so unhinged because he made a deal with the devil but look so HOT while he's at it!!!#particularly the last screenshot... those wide crazed eyes... oooooh game freak was cooking and the kitchen exploded in a fire i fear#a.k.a they cooked so hard that this whole sequence will Haunt me the rest of my life like cynthia's piano intro for sure#also have i mentioned that he's so hot. how the hell does he do that#it's 12 am and i just woke up from a super long nap and i just miss him so much... i need to see him in pokemas or the mainline game again#gawd yeah i'm still obsessed with the last screenshot. never in a million years would i expect to see someone who looks like cynthia use#an expression like that... 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭😭 i love pla so much you guyssss#volo#pokemon volo#pokemon wielder volo#pokemon legends arceus#pokemon#pla#pokemon: legends arceus#hisui
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OBSESSION.
context.
#birdiepfftdraws#yeah my rambles getting out of hand and i fucked up the formatting#it's meant to look cool and reveal ratchet and starscream once u press on the image#but whatever#megop#transformers#tf one#tf one megop#transformers one#doomed ass yaoi#megastar but like toxic ig#optiratch kinda#i'm cooked#this colouring style is killing me#i have work in 6 hours#this isn't my proudest work and im kinda mad#ratchet looks cute though#maccadam#my art#artists on tumblr#optimus prime#megatron
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❝I will just root for you quietly, then.❞
FIRST KANAPHAN as KANT PATTANAWAT and KHAOTUNG THANAWAT as BISON episode 9 of THE HEART KILLERS
#the heart killers#the heart killers the series#first kanaphan#khaotung thanawat#firstkhao#firstkhaotung#kantbison#long post#gmmtv series#gmmtv bl#thai bl#mlm#thkedit#th: the heart killers#bibi gifs#userrlana#tusermona#tuserhidden#tuserrowan#yeah#affection#no one does it like them#i'm biased but i don't care#also love how they keep making khaotung's characters bad at cooking#when he's the one who knows to cook#when are your skills going to be used darling?
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as we enter the start of a semester and the dreaded Hour of Making Friends us upon us... if ur ever at a loss for what to say in one of those weird social situations where you only vaguely-know people, one of my favorite questions to ask is "what is your favorite food crime." a food crime is like the food combination that you love that other people find revolting. press them to take it further than pineapple on pizza, that's rote. food crimes is a good topic that has many benefits as it turns out all people are degenerates and also it will give you some cool ideas to try out later in the privacy of your own degenerate kitchen
the other good thing to ask is "okay but has anyone here ever been someplace haunted" bc it turns out if you ask most people directly they don't believe in ghosts, but many people are like "oh yeah i lived in a haunted house. ghosts aren't real tho"
#my food crime is that i regularly make a “pasta and tuna” situation that has somehow gotten even more evil and degenerate over time.#it is a ''white wine reduction'' (it's just white wine and garlic powder & seasoning)#and tuna from a can.#and plain pasta.#if i have the spoons i will actually chop garlic for it but this tends to be my comfort food for a REALLY bad day#bc its super easy to make:#boil pasta. drain. put into bowl for later. into same pot u used for pasta.#put tuna (with oil/water from can). let fry a little for like 2-3 min. put in whatever amount of wine. season to taste.#the tuna will get a little crisp on it which is nice. important side note:#this began as a Bolognese sauce.#and one day i had to sub for tuna. i know. not ideal. i cried about it too.#somehow over time it is now its own little evil thing. i would never make someone else eat it. it is beautiful.#but yeah i don't even stir the pasta in afterwards i just slap pasta into serving bowl#slap this ''''''sauce'''''''' on top#molto bene#(i really can cook fairly well btw. this is a food crime. not a suggestion of skill or ability)#(i LOVE baking but when i cook for myself. the autism is obvious. bc i just don't understand the point of most of the steps)#(.... i can just eat the deli meat out of the bag. it is protein. i don't even have to like it. i just have to eat enough calories.)#(also i used to cook MUCH more before this apartment which is so small that i can stretch my arms out and overreach the counter length.)#(.... i'm 5.2. so.)
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You know what I really love that should be explored in even more Merlin fanfics?
Immortal Leon. Like, you've just got Merlin over there sulking about while he waits for Arthur to return. Then there's just Leon, living his best immortal life, doing the most randomest shit known to mankind
#bonus points if merlin and leon are like fully bonded over the fact that they are the only two people left from their time#i want in depth nostalgic conversations between them over the return of arthur... while cooking some food in an airfryer or something#or EVEN BETTER- leon has learned a bunch of skills over the years and while merlin sticks to himself you have leon having famous careers#like they meet up for their like annual get together or whatever and then leon's just like#“oh yeah i got bored of being a world renowned painter so now i'm just going to go and write some socially critical novel”#basically what i'm saying is i want a fic where arthur comes back and merlin is frantically rushing around and he calls up leon#and leon answers like “hey merlin so glad to hear from you but can this call wait i'm about to perform at my world tour concert”#bbc merlin#immortal leon#sir leon#merlin#arthur pendragon
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older gf!cait loves to remind you about using your manners!
#caitlynྀི txt.#older gf!caitlyn.#yeah... i'm cooking something up#arcane#arcane x reader#caitlyn arcane#caitlyn kiramman#caitlyn kiramman x reader#caitlyn kiramman smut#lesbian
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Yoi is a babe 🫶
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A diva, is what he is.
#dema answers#atla#avatar the last airbender#zuko#atla fanart#atla art#the crew#Ensign Yoi#Royal Guard Ming#atla ming#zuko's crew#for the spirits#new gods au#spirit touched zuko#and his entourage of rambunctious fools#Fun fact! If it's Ming complimenting him then Yoi's reaction would be VASTLY different#With her it's either A: nervous teasing to hide the fact that he is actually quite flustered.#Or B: a blushing stuttering dorky mess#Which he'll later deny. Of course.#BUT. He's actually a diva. Any compliment will only serve to stroke his ego and make him absolutely insufferable for the next few days.#Being called a babe? Yeah...you just condemned the rest of the Crew.#Enjoy the pandemonium :D#He's just a cinnamon roll a sweet dorky guy hidden under layers upon layers of Cool Guy™ vibes#He'd listen to power songs and take dance lessons in secret and be a Clingy Drunk. He'd also sing in the shower and adopt puppies.#He'd also be either the smoothest guy in the room or a terrible flirt. No in-between.#He's like...that annoying cousin that's always cooler than you (but is actually just a lovable idiot who cries during Disney movies)#I'm still cooking up his backstory#For the moment let's just say that he was just Too Much for his commanding officers to handle. So they sent him to the Prince's crew.#the rest is history#atla oc
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I want. Four to get appreciation. Because
Four gave a ton of unnoticed help when Twilight was injured
The fight with Wild was difficult, and I know we're all concerned about his negative view of the shadow crystal
But Four did something that no one else really thought of to help- He took care of Twi's stuff
From the beginning he told Twilight to not worry about them
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So Four took care of pretty much everything but the others (that Sky and Wars handled)
He took care of Epona
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Which is so very important- he took care of Twilight's horse. After her arrival at the stable Four followed up on her
And for Epona, a horse so attached to her human, having some company can help so much for reassurance
He took care of Twilight's stuff
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He got Twi's shield- his bags and equipment, and organized it into one place
And he was worried. He obviously found the shadow crystal while handling Twi's stuff, but his negative reactions to it were out of concern.
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Also- because of his placement in this scene
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I'm fairly convinced Four was ready to start cooking before Wild showed up (since he's beside the counter with food supplies). At the very least he had the basket of fruit out for everyone -but he was literally standing with food behind him- he thought of everything
And he did housekeeping!
Wars payed for the inn, so Four took care of the inn
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Realistically these boys were probably not too concerned with tidyness. Four got all of Twi's things on one table, and took care of the room they stayed in
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Organizing tables and Twi's things, having food supplies ready, and opening the curtains- overall he was the one tidying up the inn
Four helped in a huge way! He took care of Twi's horse (Epona is so important), his equipment and shield and bag, as well as the other rooms in the inn
Four filled in all the little tasks that others didn't think of. He helped in ways that were needed, but not obvious
There's a lot of problems with the shadow crystal and with Wild, and I don't know what's gonna happen in the future
But don't forget this- don't forget that Four was one who stepped up in an almost unnoticeable way
Don't forget that when everyone was barely holding it together, Four visited Twilight's horse and took care of his things
No matter what develops in the future- this amount of care shown is important ya know?
.
Art and comic from Jojo @linkeduniverse au :)))
#epona is so important#Lu four#linkeduniverse#linked universe#I work with horses and#Epona is INCREDIBLE- she's extremely attuned to humans and emotions. she doesn't scare easily and can keep her cool in a fight#but it's still super stressful to suddenly be in a fairly large and populated town- separated from her person#and for such an empathetic horse? Four going and TALKING to her- gently petting her nose and just being near her#means so so much! that literally matters so much to a horses mental state in a foreign situation- just having company#he checked on Epona and gave her company like !!!!!! it's so considerate and means so much for Epona! Four I love you !!!!!#uhhhh yeah!#with the food- I don't think the innkeeper would have free/complimentary food out- but wars wallet def had it covered#then wild showed up with potions in a cooking frenzy- but four was still shown with food behind him- he thought of everything#I don't know what's gonna happen with the shadow crystal and stuff. but no matter what happens in the future- this matters.#he did a ton of small things no one else thought of it matters he cares so much didjdkdksjfjj#I have a lot of posts I'm making/editing and trying to get to. I'm just a little gal trying my best :/#so many ideas and so little time... I love you guys and this fandom so much :))#(if I said anything off or offensive let me know... I'm always nervous about that but I want to hear from you if I'm wrong)#(also you are so so cool and valuable don't forget that ok? I love you and you are important)#:)
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dpxdc - Neglected Child AU
As one of his first acts as Ghost King, Danny basically created ghost CPS. Mostly they help new spirits come to terms with the fact that they're dead, but situations like Danny's are a lot more common than the Observants had lead him to believe. People who come back from the dead or are exposed to large quantities of unstable ectoplasm often lead sad, short second lives. Either because they are unable to obtain the nutrients their new forms require, or because their communities turn against them in fear. This is a story about Jason Todd.
There was a lot Jazz loved about her job. She loved helping young ghosts find acceptance. She loved matching cases with foster Fraids. She loved meeting new people. She loved the rare excuse to travel dimensions. But some days, Jazz was intimately reminded of why this program was formed in the first place.
Knock, knock, knock.
Jazz looked up from her laptop. “Come in!”
Apple – the ghost of a dryad whose tree was chopped down two summers ago – poked her head in.
“Uh, Lady- I mean, Ms. Phan-, no,” Apple took a shuddering breath. Jazz smiled encouragingly. The girl had only been working here for a season, and already she was making excellent progress. “Ms. Jasmine, there’s a city spirit here to see you, uh, on behalf of a uh, potential client.”
“Thank you, Apple, you can send them in.” Jazz said.
Apple flushed green, closing the door with a sigh. Jazz guessed she had about two minutes before the impromptu meeting began. She used the time to sweep some papers off her desk and into a drawer. It had been some time since she’d had a walk-in like this. Jazz had a strict open doors policy when it came to her office, despite the technical fact that her door was often closed; it was just easier to focus that way! She had no idea why most ghosts preferred to submit claims by mail, really it was much better for them to speak with an officer in person.
Thirty years ago, Jazz would’ve had trouble describing the spirit that walked through the doors. Fifty years ago, even looking at it would’ve been painful. But Jasmine Duchess Phantom had been living in the Infinite Realms for almost eighty years now, and liminal senses reached out subconsciously, cataloging scents and colors that her mortal mind would have balked at.
The shape of a steel-colored skeleton peered out at her from a billowing cloud of grey smoke, which curled around its feet and seeped across the floor. Jazz tasted gunmetal and sugar, smelled stale urine and burned bread, felt desperation-fear-hunger-love crash violently against her. Like a cliff to a wave, Jazz stood her ground, letting herself be tested. This spirit was old and afraid; when it spoke, it spoke in a million overlapping voices.
“My apologies for barging in unannounced, Your Grace. I come before you with an issue of great import. One I have reason to believe our King may have a personal interest in.”
Jazz nodded, “My doors are always open, City Spirit. I’m always happy to help. But before I hear your petition, may I know who I am addressing?”
The skeleton did not move that she could see, but Jazz heard windchimes like chittering laughter.
“I am Gotham, Your Grace. My apologies for my rudeness. I have little reason to travel these days and am unaccustomed to necessary introductions.”
Jazz nodded, committing the name and its taste to memory. “No need to apologize, Gotham. Your situation is not unique amongst your kind. Have a seat,” Jazz gestured at the plush couch across from her desk. “What troubles you so, to bring you so far from home?”
There was more windchime tittering, and Jazz wondered if the spirit was laughing or just readjusting itself on a plane she could not see. A nervous tick, perhaps? Maybe she could send Apple for something to make Gotham feel more at ease. Bullet casings or chocolate chip cookies would be equally soothing to this entity, Jazz guessed.
Gotham folded into itself, form blurring slightly before reforming on the couch, leaned forward with elbows on knees. “Many years ago, a mortal man pledged himself to my service. I accepted him as a City Guard, my mortal Champion. This man has many children who have likewise pledged themselves to my protection.”
Jazz smothered the urge to interrupt. She loathed the idea of child Guards; the fact that this City Spirit was here now asking for help meant that this instance had gone just as well as it usually did.
Unaware of her internal judgement, Gotham continued. “The second child died and revived some seven years ago, I…” This time, the rattling sound emanating from Gotham shook the room with the force of a thunderclap. “You have to understand, I don’t claim kids as champions, so technically he was never even under my protection. And when he came back, he ran! I don’t have power outside the city, you know, so even if, well, it’s not like there was anything I could have done differently,”
Jazz was aware that she was frowning. She could only guess what her aura felt like to Gotham, whose smoky aura was rapidly thickening. A bird puffing itself up to look bigger. A cheap trick. If Jazz were in a more compassionate mood, she might have felt embarrassed at such a juvenile display from a spirit decades older than herself.
“You neglected a child, or-” she cut off Gotham before it could protest, “allowed a child to be neglected. For seven years. What changed? Why petition him now and not then?”
Gotham chittered, “Well, you see, he came back to me just over a year ago, retook his pledge and everything. And, well, things were rough, I thought the fraid was just readjusting itself, but, er-”
“Tell me.”
“Well, the problem is I don’t exactly know what the boy is anymore, but he’s more ghostly than not, and his fraid’s fully human. If this infighting between my Guards goes on for any longer, it’ll tear me apart. I figured The King might want to step in, considering this boy might be a halfa, maybe he could help him and the fraid get back to normal.”
Jazz grinned. “Rest assured, Gotham, The Crown will indeed be taking special interest in your case.” Words dripped from her lips, caustic even to her own ears. “Now, why don’t you go outside and give Apple the rest of the details. I have some visits to make.”
#ghost king danny#dpxdc jason todd#jasmine fenton#jazz fenton#sentient gotham#neglected child au#dpxdc#yeah i'm really excited about this idea. its been cooking for a while now .#its nowhere near complete but honestly i'm having trouble with batfam characterization. if anyones interested in like#cowriting#my dms are always open#unedited
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NFU
a messy exes/right person, wrong time jegulus microfic inspired by the song NFU by del water gap for my bb @static-radio-ao3 as my thank u for the introduction :))
“Hello?”
“Regulus,” a hoarse voice rasps on the other end of the phone, drawing out the syllables of his name. Rough and low and… drunk. Extremely fucking drunk, by the sound of it.
Regulus stiffens. “James. Are you-- you’re drunk calling me. Again.”
“Very astute. You’re always so astute, Reg.”
He checks the clock on his nightstand with bleary eyes. 3:30 AM. God. Not this again.
“I thought we talked about this,” he sighs, sitting up and rubbing a hand over his eyes.
“We don’t talk much these days,” James points out rationally. “I think I would have remembered.”
Regulus rolls his eyes. Not fucking likely.
“Since you were in a similar state the last time we had this conversation, I’m not surprised you don’t remember. Just so we’re clear that doesn’t make it okay, James. This is— you have to stop doing this.”
By ‘this’ Regulus means getting wasted and calling him when James is too far gone to talk himself out of the idea. And, if Regulus were smart, he would stop picking up when James’ name flashes across his screen.
“Like I said. Astute.”
Drunk James is his worst nightmare, truly. Drunk James is a walking, talking reminder of everything he doesn’t have anymore, everything he will never have again. When he calls, lacking crucial social skills like self-control and any modicum of a filter, Regulus is forced to be the rational one, reminding them both that this boundary exists for a reason. A very good reason.
“Okay. Well I’m glad— it’s good that we talked about this. But this is— this has to be the last time. I’m hanging up now, okay?”
James continues as if he never spoke. “How’s your um— your boyfriend doing?”
Immediately no.
“I’m not talking about this with you—” Regulus attempts to shut him down, but James is nothing if not obstinate.
“You’re still dating the guy with the dumb fucking name, right?”
James knows full well that he is. Sirius would have informed him otherwise. He just wants to hear Regulus say it because he’s fucking sick and twisted. Naturally, Regulus can’t give him the satisfaction, so he avoids the question.
“You can’t think Regulus is a perfectly normal name and then turn around and shit on a guy for being named Kingsley.”
James scoffs on the other end of the phone. “I can shit on him as much as I want. Fucking hate that fucker.”
“You’ve never met him. You can’t hate someone you’ve never even met.”
“Sirius hates him.”
“Sirius doesn’t hate him—” Sirius just wishes he was you.
“Mhm. Told me so. Said he’s a little bitch who can’t hold his liquor.”
Now it’s Regulus’ turn to scoff. “This coming from you right now? You sound so fucked up, I doubt you can even see straight. Not that you could before, but—”
“I’m not fucked up,” James insists, then says calmly, “I just missed the way that you talk.”
This. This was why they had to stop. In his worst moments, Regulus loathes the fact that Sober James all but ignores him most of the time, only bothering to text him on important holidays or birthdays. That is, until he’s reminded that Drunk James wants to ruin him— completely and thoroughly— by the casual cruelty of speaking his mind and expecting Regulus to go on peacefully with his life as if he didn’t just upend it entirely.
“James…” he starts shakily.
“Shit, that sounded stupid. This was,” James hiccups, “not my best idea, I fear. Rash. Extremely rash feeling.”
“What, drunk calling your ex? Yeah, I would say it’s one of your worst.”
James is quiet for a moment. “You kill me, you know? I-I hate talking to you.”
Rage wells up in Regulus’ throat so fast he nearly chokes on it. “You called me—”
“God, you sound good. You always sound sexy when you’re angry, did you know that? Rougher… hotter. All red in the face and your neck…I can almost see it, if I squint.” James pauses, presumably squinting like a drunken idiot. “Maybe that’s why I called you— to make you angry. To hear you be angry at me again. Stupid fucking thing to miss, isn’t it?”
Yet again, Regulus is at a loss.
“You— I’m— God, you’re a real fucking bastard, you know that? Do you have any idea how excruciating it is to talk to you when you’re like this?”
But James ignores him, saying ruefully, “Sirius told me, he always tells me, he says, ‘Don’t do it, James. You always regret it, you always yell at me the next day for letting you call him,’ but he can’t stop me,” a childish giggle bursts from him. “I’m too fast. Much, much faster than him, just for the record. He’s never once beat me in a foot race, and if he says he has he’s a big, fat fucking liar—”
“James, I sincerely don’t give a fuck about that— be honest, did you run away from him at the bar?”
Drunk James will do that. He’s a runner. Well, not when Regulus was around to keep him on a tight leash, but it seems that without him, James is turning back to some of his worst habits.
The line goes quiet. Then, “A little bit.”
“It’s a yes or no question, James.”
“Mm.” He seems to think on it. “Yes, then.”
Regulus tosses his hand in the air, forgetting James can’t see him. “Go back and find him!”
“Don’t want to,” James sniffs. “Tryin to make my mistakes in peace.”
“You— I’m hanging up and calling Sirius.”
“No, no don’t!” James yells into the receiver, making Regulus wince and pull his phone away from his ear. James’ voice is much quieter when he speaks again.
“Don’t, I have to say— I wanted to tell you. I have to tell you that I’m sorry, Regulus. I’m so fucking sorry.”
A pit of dread forms in his stomach. James sounds wretched. He sounds like how Regulus feels when he thinks too long about how far they’ve drifted apart, how little they speak to each other anymore. For one infinitesimal second, Regulus gets the satisfaction of knowing that he’s not alone in this specific shade of misery— dark blue and bottomless. And then he reminds himself that he’s sober and his ex-boyfriend is drunk and they shouldn’t even be fucking talking right now if they knows what’s good for them.
“James, look, you’re drunk, you’re emotional—”
“‘S not what I’m apologizing for.”
“What, then?”
“Everything. All of it. I never—I wanted…”
Don’t say it, Regulus begs silently. Please don’t say what I—
“I still love you,” James breathes out. “I love you so much I can’t breathe around it.”
Regulus lets his eyes sink closed, firmly shuttering the tears forming in his eyes. He can’t let himself say it back. He can’t. If he does…
“James…” Regulus lets himself savor the sound of his name on his tongue. Then says softly, “It’s okay.”
They both know it’s not.
______________________________
James looks down at the number on his phone. Blinks, just to make sure he isn’t imagining… but, no, he isn’t making it up. He picks up his phone, his apprehension growing.
“Regulus?” he asks, unsure.
A snort sounds on the other line. “Hm, fffancy seeing you here.”
James blinks again. “...We’re talking over the phone.”
He doesn’t have to see Regulus to know that he’s just waved James’ words away with a flippant hand. “Metaphorically, then.”
It’s been weeks since the last time they spoke. James remembers very little of that ill-conceived conversation, except of course for the part where he said the one thing he promised himself he would never say again because his brain hates him. It’s played on a loop in his head everyday since, his ragged, sincere words and Regulus’ noncommittal response to them.
It’s okay, he had said.
It was anything but okay. They both knew that.
He had been doing so well, had been training himself to think of other things besides his ex boyfriend and his ex boyfriend’s new boyfriend and what the two of them were getting up to together, all the fun things they were probably doing while James was just focused on getting through his day. On getting to the next one. The next. The next the next the next the next the next—
“You don’t have ‘nything to say? Hm?” Regulus’ words slur. Unusual for him. Regulus was always so in control of himself.
James frowns. “Are you okay? You sound—”
“Drunk? Well, that’s because I am. Royally, massively fucking toasted. Thought I’d return the favor and call you for once. ‘S your lucky day.”
“Oh. I guess— I deserve that.”
“I’ll say. Taste of your own medicine. Drink up, Potter.”
James huffs a humorless laugh. “You must be drunk if you’re calling me ‘Potter’. You never call me that.”
“Never say never, Potter,” he spits out meanly. “It’s never a good idea to say never, remember? Remember how not good of an idea it is to use the word never? My therapist, she says I need to stop talking in absolutes. Never and always. Never say never, I learned that from her. Shame you didn’t, too.”
James sinks into a kitchen chair, burying his face in his free hand, rubbing out the headache growing in his left temple. “You were right,” he admits. “This is excruciating.”
This conversation is making him feel awful for every single time he’s dialed Regulus drunk, the barrier between his thoughts and his words nowhere to be found. Regulus was right. He deserved a taste of his own medicine. He deserved this for every single second Regulus had to keep his cool on the other line while James was busy fucking them up a little more than they already had been.
“Like remember when you said we’d never break up? Or when you said you’d always love me? Hilarious. Really, really funny stuff.”
Regulus’ voice is liquid rage, red hot and acidic. James swears it’s burning him through the phone.
He sighs. “Regulus. Can we not?”
“No, no, we should talk about it. It’s been long enough. We can be rational adults and have a damn conversation. Here, you know what, I’ll even go first. I wanted you to come with me, you know. I should have asked you. To come with me.”
James feels his heart stutter in his chest at those words. “You did ask me to come with you,” he murmurs.
Regulus was waiting for that, like a snake rearing to strike. “Wait. Yessss, that’s right. I asked you to come with me and you said no! Now I remember. You said fucking no.”
James clenches his jaw, his own anger slowly rising up the column of his throat. “I didn’t say no. I asked for some time to decide if I wanted to upend my life and move across the country, which is a pretty sane response to a question of that fucking magnitude. You’re the one who decided my hesitation meant I didn’t love you.”
“Well, it sure didn’t feel like you loved me when you let me leave.”
“Let you—?!” James cuts off, knowing he’ll blow a gasket if he doesn’t calm himself. “Regulus,” he starts, “I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but no one lets you do anything! You do whatever you please and damn the consequences! I just never— I didn’t want to be one of those consequences.”
Regulus, to no one’s shock, does not attempt to calm himself. In fact, James fears he’s only stoked the flames.
“You are hands down the most infuriating human being on the face of the goddamn planet! Of course you’re blaming me! Of course, like you were just an innocent bystander while I went about ruining our relationship! Like you had nothing to do with it! You had no part in it, no, not perfect James Potter, never him! I cannot believe— I just— it’s all so— fuck!”
His voice breaks on the word and then the rest of him breaks too. His tears sound painful, like they’re fighting they’re way out of Regulus’ body with each sob. He cries loudly and messily and James can’t pretend like the sound doesn’t break his heart all over again.
“Regulus?” He makes his voice gentle. Soothing. “Hey, don’t cry. Listen, you’re drunk. Why don’t we try talking when you’ve sobered up?”
“No, James,” he sobs, gasping for breath. “You don’t understand. I fucked up. I fucked up.”
James sits up straighter, alarmed.
“Are you okay? Are you safe? What’s going on—”
Regulus sniffles. “No, I’m— I’m at my place. I’m fine. It’s just… it’s Kingsley.”
James’ mind goes still in a way that should scare him but doesn’t. “Did he hurt you?” He doesn’t bother keeping the cool rage out of his voice.
“No!” Regulus nearly shouts. “No.. the opposite, actually. I hurt him. Badly.”
James closes his eyes and takes a deep, slow breath. “Look… I’m sorry you’re upset but I really don’t want to listen to your lover’s spat—”
“I said your name last night,” Regulus whispers.
“You—what?”
Regulus doesn’t hold himself back. “He fucked me and I said your name. When I came. Yelled it, actually. No way to hide it. James and Kingsley don’t sound remotely similar.”
And that— well. James has lost the ability for rational thought. “Oh,” he manages.
“Yeah, oh,” Regulus mimics him harshly. “He stormed out and we haven’t talked since. And I think— I think he’s going to break up with me now. He should break up with me. It’s— what I did is unforgivable.”
No matter how hard he tries, James can’t think of a single thing to say to this information. Naturally, Regulus won’t let that stand.
“James? Are you gonna say something?”
“What do you want me to say?” he asks weakly.
“Say you’re sorry!” Regulus shouts. “Say you’re sorry for drunk calling me all the fucking time, for reminding me that you exist, for reminding me I still fucking love—”
He cuts off, but not quite quickly enough. James still heard everything he didn’t say.
“I am sorry,” he says, voice rough. “I’m really, really sorry, Reg.”
He hears the hitch in Regulus’ breath. If he closes his eyes he can see Regulus before him, see the pain take up residence on his beautiful face, the way he scrunches his nose when he cries, his eyes going stark red, his cheeks staining themselves pink.
He can see Regulus so clearly in his mind. But he didn’t see what was coming next.
“I-I just want to be with you again,” Regulus cries softly. “I want to be with you, baby. I’ll move back, I’ll quit my program, I’ll move in with you like you wanted, I’ll do anything— but I can’t live like this anymore, James, I can’t, I can’t—”
James’ own tears slide down his cheeks silently, falling off the cliff-edge of his chin.
“Regulus,” he says as firmly as he can manage. “Stop it. Please. You didn’t move away on a whim, okay? You’re in an amazing program. You love Chicago, you love the city and the river walk and the Art Institute and that bookshop across from Grant Park—”
“You can’t— I didn’t tell you about any of—”
“I pay attention. I know you love it. And I love where I live. I love my job here.” He forces the next words to leave his mouth, even though they taste like poison. “We’re… in the right places for ourselves. I have to believe that.”
This doesn’t satisfy Regulus. The most twisted part of him is glad about that.
“Why don’t you get it, James? I can’t be in the right place if I’m not with you. The right place doesn’t exist if we aren’t in it together.”
James squeezes his eyes shut tightly. Regulus can’t know how badly this is hurting him. He can’t know that James feels like dying every day they spend apart, that James has applied for over ten jobs in Chicago just to hear nothing back, has looked at apartments in Regulus’ neighborhood enough times he’s saved the site to his favorites bar. Even when Regulus was dating someone else. Even after Regulus had moved on from him.
He's looked at it from so many angles, tried to reconfigure it so many times in his mind, and nothing made sense for them. One of them would always be giving up something, making sacrifices for the other, letting the resentment build.
Even thought Regulus is saying everything he’s been wanting to hear for an entire year...
He’s drunk. He’s drunk and he doesn’t know what he’s saying. Doesn’t know what he wants.
“We’re happy, Regulus,” James tells him stiffly. “We’re both happy.”
Maybe if he keeps repeating it, he’ll finally start to believe it.
“If this is what happiness feels like,” Regulus snarls, “then I don’t want to be fucking happy.”
No. And James doesn’t either.
“You’ll feel differently in the morning. I promise.”
Regulus laughs without humor. “I’ll still want you in the morning. Being sober doesn’t change that. It just lets me hold on to a shred of my dignity and not call you to tell you about it. But it doesn’t change a damn thing. You have to know that.”
He’s drunk, James reminds himself. He’s just drunk.
“Goodnight, Regulus,” he chokes out.
“I still love you, James.”
“It’s okay, Reg. It’ll be okay.”
They both know it won’t be.
#hahahahaha#cooked this up on the drive home (listening to NFU ofc) and knew i would be sitting myself down to write it#yeah i'm gnawing on the right person wrong time trope for these two#the idea that they love each other but might not belong together#mmmm yep. yep hurts SO good.#lyrics from NFU i would be REMISS not to mention include: i'm not fucked up i just miss the way that you talk#and i still love you you say it's okay#but it's not#YEAHHHHHH YUUUUUUP#this is for mil bc she opened my eyes to dwg#and also i love her <3#jegulus#jeggy#jegulus microfic#james potter#regulus black#james potter x regulus black
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Hiiiiiii. Episode 25/26 lawlight analysis rant thingy here. I don't know how to write an intro for this so let's just get to it LOL
I think one of the reasons that the rain/foot scenes stick out so much (the. Sheer insanity of a Foot Massage Scene in an anime revolving around two guys trying to kill each other aside 💀) is the fact that the anime specifically suffers a bit in terms of adapting a few of the "emotional" moments in death note.
And I don't mean "emotionally impactful" exactly. For example I think the adaptations of scenes like Raye and Naomi's deaths were very impactful and the atmospheres of their final scenes were great, but I mean more from a characterization standpoint (if that makes sense). Being more focused on mind and logic games, Death Note as a whole isn't as invested in individual characters' deeper feelings as it is in its action (which isn't necessarily a criticism per say, it's simply part of the nature of a mystery thriller series). But just because they're fewer and farther between doesn't mean there are none at all. In the manga we do get to see, for example, how much Light actually cared for his family and especially Sayu, and how he actually felt more conflicted and suffered lack of sleep/appetite when he first used the Death Note.
The anime specifically as an adaptation is pretty good at adapting the main mind fuckery and action of Death Note, but its lacking in properly adapting scenes like the ones I mentioned above is a criticism I see somewhat often, and it's pretty fair imo. Compared to all the other adaptations, it certainly seems to fall short on an emotional level: the musical has entire songs going in depth about the characters feelings and relationships, the 2015 jdrama is. Insane and has its emotional moments in spades (because it's a TV drama, which are more focused on portraying emotional conflict and the like), even the 2006 movies has its emotional beats and L Change the WorLd is. Well. Oh Man.
Anime Light to a lot of people is like. Light but he's "already evil" (which I have my own thoughts on but I digress). Light but after using the Death Note for like 2 minutes he's already like "fuck yeah time to kill criminals". Basically the anime doesn't take as much time to delve into his less cynical sides or really delve into his already vague and harder to decipher feelings in general, he is noticeably colder from the get-go here, etc.
But that's part of why I think episode 25 manages to stand out so much tonally (apart from it being, y'know, the episode L literally Dies). I love the episode so much and could probably rant for hours about how much I love the artistic choices made in it but what I'm trying to get at here is that it's one of the very few moments where the show tries to go deeper into specific character's emotions, and one of the very few moments where the show Attempts (emphasis on "attempts" because, well, you'll see in a bit) to get more in-depth into Light's feelings apart from his cynicism/apathy/justice. ness.
L in these two scenes in episode 25 is, well, pretty damn open about how he feels. It's usually interpreted as him knowing that he's going to die, and you can see it. He visibly looks/sounds lost, somber, etc. He never really had much to hide around Light to begin with (since he doesn't really care about hiding himself the same way Light does) but especially not now and it Shows, and I personally thought it was pretty cool to delve into his thoughts/show how he feels this way. The somberness can be felt throughout the entire scene, even people who don't already know the plot of Death Note from the manga could probably tell that he's about to die.
In the manga, once L starts suspecting Misa again and Rem realizes what Light is trying to do, it goes straight to Watari and L's deaths, but the anime instead gives a distinct and unexpected pause in the middle of this where L contemplates his own death. It's fucking great, and the shift from straight action to slower emotional weight makes these scenes stand out a lot, since, like I said, the show usually focuses more on the former. But it's kind of ironic, too.
Not only does the anime open up L's feelings more in these scenes, but it also tries to dig deeper into Light's feelings as well through L. And it's really funny honestly because while, yes, these are the more "emotionally open" scenes of the anime Light still manages to be Incredibly avoidant and contribute almost nothing to the entire ordeal.
L is visibly upset -> "Yeah Ryuzaki, you're not making any sense at all" (Not addressing the obvious conflict from L)
"Tell me, Light. From the moment you were born, has there ever been a point where you've actually told the truth?" -> "[The most stale, over-explained, avoidant answer to a "yes/no" question that you could ever hear + blatant attempts to reframe the question]"
(L's half-smile here kills me) "I had a feeling you'd say something like that" -> [Nothing]
"I'm sorry" -> [Nothing]
"It'll be lonely won't it? You and I will be parting ways soon" -> [Nothing]
^ From this point Light continues to say literally Nothing for the rest of the scene. I'm not even joking, from then on the rest of Light's voicelines are reduced to nothing but vague noises of confusion.
Everytime L calls Light out as a person ("Has there ever been a point where you've actually told the truth?" / "I had a feeling you'd say something like that." / "Won't it be lonely?") he doesn't actually acknowledge anything. Out of those three lines, he only answers verbally to if he's ever told the truth, and even then it's the most blatantly people-pleasing answer ever, as it usually is with Light. And I don't think it's because Light just. Doesn't care about any of what L's saying at all, or that he doesn't know what the hell he's talking about (questioning Light's authenticity as a person, saying it would be lonely when they part), instead he's choosing not to acknowledge any of what this means about himself or him and L at all. He's like a fucking wall.
And like, for the truth question in particular, the show makes sure that you know it's not something that Light just. Doesn't care enough about to answer. The hard cuts to silence are a very rare but extremely effective way that the show conveys an extremely important moment (see: Light regaining his memories, Matsuda noticing Light opening the warehouse door before he escapes (not as much of a "direct" cut to silence but still)), and cuts to multiple angles/framings/zooms of the exact same shot are also used for the same purpose (see: Light hugging Misa when she was crying, Matsuda aiming his gun to shoot Light, Light regaining his memories Again). Just like the scene where Light gets his memories back, the moment L's question finishes the show utilizes both. That question cut Deep. There's is a solid Almost 5 seconds of silence before the sound of the rain gradually starts fading back in, and honestly that should be telling enough as is (but of course Light doesn't actually admit that. Or anything at all really, so). Oh also another fun detail! We do not see Light's face At All (except for the shot where you can see his mouth moving but not his eyes), for the Entire time that he's going on his spiel to L. We Will Be Revisiting This Later, by the way. This is not, in fact, the first time you're going to see this detail from Light.
The only sort of reciprocation that we see from Light during Any of these two scenes is when Light dries L's hair while L dries his feet. Biblical meanings/references aside it's interesting because it's the only time he directly does anything "for" L in these scenes, but even then he doesn't try to pass it off as anything meaningful really the same way L does ("You're still soaked", a purely neutral and factual statement. It doesn't Add Anything compared to L's. Sin atonement loneliness grieving stuff. While Light is showing his own reciprocation to this more personal moment he also tries to keep it impersonal enough that it doesn't actually have to mean anything deep). And when L says "I'm sorry" after he once again gets no response from Light. It's also after this that L gets that pained look on his face, like he knows that at this point he's not actually going to get anything meaningful from Light (again, very significant and rare from L in the show. We've seen him in distress (see: when Ukita died, hell, when Watari dies), but even then he mostly manages to keep his usually neutral expression), we never see him "look sad" like he does here):
I just think it's interesting that this is one of the few scenes in this particular adaptation of Death Note where they try to open up the character's thoughts/feeling (especially considering the fact that they. lowkey blunder in adaptations of original scenes from the manga), and L himself is being rather open (not that he ever really tries to hide what he thinks nearly as much as Light), and yet all Light contributes to it in return is like. Actually nothing. Bro fumbled it. There is no resolution to any of this, to any of what L asks at all, to any of the many opportunities for a meaningful conversation, and the only thing even relatively close to an answer that you can get from Light is what you can infer from how he acts in the episode after L dies, where he's just going through the motions, but hardly acting as if he's actually living at all.
(Honestly I think the transition from this scene with the taskforce to the subsequent scene with Misa says enough on its own. Light's expressions and tone says everything:)
(Oh sidenote but. This shit again:
"Light, this is our first date in forever. can't you enjoy yourself a little more?" ('Why don't you seem happy? We can finally be together since L is dead') -> No response, Light instead changing the topic to him wanting to move in with Misa without changing his mannerisms at all
Also there's that one detail again. You pretty much don't see Light's expression when he speaks here at all, except for one shot of his eyes, which is quite literally the exact same shot they used when he "saw" L, just altered for the new setting. You have No idea what he looks like when he's responding to Misa, although it's probably fair to assume that it's the same empty stare he has for the whole Two Shots where you can clearly see his whole expression in the entire scene.
Something something Light Yagami bad at feelings I think you get the point though)
I guess Light's Kind of showing what he's feeling now? He'll admit to himself that it's boring without L, but no more than that. Light never actually admits to anything "significant", and L's dead already anyway, so what would that even do?
And then we get, uh. Basically nothing from Light. For the next 5 Years. Except that he joined the NPA, so, uh, yay? Good job, Light you totally nailed it! Thank you for allowing us as an audience to delve deeper into your inner thoughts and feelings as a character so we can find out more about you as a person! Very helpful! Thank you for not sabotaging one of your few dedicated opportunities to look into yourself as a person and reflect on your relationships with others and being 100% honest with yourself! We stay winning guys.
Anyway, this got way too long for a scene that's over a decade old, and I've probably just said everything that everyone else has already said in this fandom before. But unfortunately this has been living in my head for way too long and I must scream. I just think this episode's neat is all :)
tl;dr Part of the reason why the rain/foot scene (tbh episode 25 in General) stands out so much is because the Death Note anime specifically was a bit robbed in terms of its more emotional character moments compared to the other medias, which makes more somber/introspective scenes like the ones in episode 25 stand out a Lot in comparison. But it's also incredibly ironic because it's one of the few moments where the show (or specifically L) tries to look deeper into Light's character, but because he is so avoidant for the entire duration of these two scenes he adds basically nothing at all. It's almost funny. Mostly sad. It's also very gay. Aand post
Okay actually nevermind one more thing I talked about how the jdrama is supposed to be more emotionally in-depth because it is a TV Drama and just for the record, same thing happens there! I could probably do an entire analysis of the Blue Scene in this context like I did with episode 25 but I'd literally be here forever, so uh, just take this iconic line as my main example:
Same Thing. L's statement "I wish we could have met some other way" is personal. It's his own wish, his own regret that he is expressing to Light. While Light's reply obviously has that same regret implied it's also phrased in a specifically impersonal way. It's closed off. "This is the only way we could have met" it closes off the topic and simply renders L's wish as ultimately futile. Light does not say that he Also wishes he could have met L a different way even if it was likely impossible, instead it's a cold statement of cynical fact.
Idk just. Something something L being able and Willing to be more openly sentimental/emotionally open towards Light/about Light vs. Light's inability to be honest with anyone including himself and his own nature preventing any form of meaningful reciprocation. Something something self-sabotage, y'know the drill. God don't even get me Started on how sincere L's tone is when he says "It'll be lonely won't it?"(at least in the eng dub) in the anime I could talk about his tone in that scene for ages. Also yes all of this relates to L Change the WorLd too by the way. Don't ask how it just does okay.
I do think that scenes like these (rain/foot scene, The Blue Scene. Uh. L Change the WorLd The Novel Adaptation) show, at least in those adaptations, that L does genuinely care for Light, and show that he values him as a friend not just in the mindgame-equal sense but also just like, a more sincere sense you know. Idk if that made any sense and that's a whole other topic for another day but you guys just have to believe me on this one alright please please believe me buries head in hands. Okay post over finally thanks for coming to my tedtalk hope you enjoyed my very-unnecessarily long analysis of the week
#death note#dn#light yagami#l lawliet#lawlight#death note anime#coda analyzes stuff#sorry this is all very scattered and probably doesn't make sense i wrote this on a whim one day and then the post had a mind of its own#this was originally gonna be shorter but then light yagami (derogatory) happened#it was so difficult to avoid going on 27450438 different tangents i love this series btw#you know my post about LCtW parallels with Light post L's death. yeah pretend i copy pasted that whole analysis here too#it also applies and is very relevant#death note multiverse my beloved i will love you forever#i just ran this through a word counter 1K+ word rant about these scenes. in 2024. God i'm Cooked#^ LMAOOOOOOOO (laughs in ~2.5K wordcount weeks later at the time of finally finishing writing this) god I Hate it here#also sorry i havent been posting a lot of art lately i'm busy and i've decided to save up all my Art Energy for lawlight week#so i've just been finishing off and posting analysis that have been floating in my drafts.lawlight stp au parallels/notes are probably next#sorry not sorry </3
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I'm sorry did I just go downstairs to make breakfast and see
c r u m b s
on the fucking
c o u n t e r
#personal#bad housemates#the crumb saga#(for reference: my housemates are VERY strict about No Crumbs On The Counter and this has blown up in a huge way)#(there's more to it than that- I do genuinely struggle with finishing chores late and I freely admit it. so I'm not entirely innocent here)#(but the crumbs have been this whole Thing as people may recall from my posting about it)#(to the point where my housemates have been like 'yeah we all think the kitchen is gross and don't want to cook there. because of you')#(when the kitchen is- I have posted photos to prove it -borderline spotless)#(and the only sticking point seems to be...fucking CRUMBS I guess)#(I have been declared the Sole Crumb-Leaver and treated accordingly and now I find THIS)
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You took my friend! How dare you! /J
That's it! *Makes your god into a horse*
(in other words, ponyfication because mlp brainrot is brainrotting)
@bigidiotenergytm
(edit: oops forgot to tag)
#epic poseidon#lol#epic the musical#sofidraws#sofidragon205#poseidon#epic the ocean saga#epic the vengance saga#i don't remember saga names#fanart#bigidiotenergy#help#joke#but being for real I love your art#your works are MWAH#chef's kiss#seriously#I didn't draw my Pos with yours because I don't have a design yet#but i AM cooking#have this instead lmfao#mlp x epic?#ponyfication#I think he wouldn't even mind#cause#he himself is supposedly a horse#or a kelpie#yeah I'm just rambling atp#enjoy goofy joke fanart
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Rivals wanting me to buy Rupert being the best looking guy on the show when Declan and his son are right there very unserious .
#aidan turner#rivals#declan o’hara#patrick o'hara#like were not suppose to notice how hot declan is and just see him as the dad ? Yeah okay#word on the street is Cameron get to have both o hara men good for her#I'm not a Rupert girly really#Cameron cook#nafessa williams
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james potter as a line cook who blasts songs like Yeah! by USHER in the kitchen at 10 am every single morning and regulus as a server who's just trying to get through his shifts without crying in the walk in
#also yeah#i have a line cook at work who blasts yeah! at 10 am 🙂↕️#so it is accurate!#that line cook also blasted like barbie girl#and that's also in James' rotation#he'd be blasting I'm Just Ken and Reg would be hyperventilating in the freezer#when they get closer Reg would come back to vent to him about his tables#most of the time it's stupid but it's Not like he asked what they wanted and they just Stared at him and no one talked#that sorta thing#really fucking annoying I would shoot myself if I were Reg#i don't care#I am dramatic and so is he#or he's complaining about how his table Keeps asking for more coffee even if it's just like their second cup#anyways#he'd be doing that and then silently James would like change the song to something “angry” to yknow “match the vibe”#because he's ridiculous like that#and reg would like him so so much#jegulus
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