#yeah I’m shutting up now

[quinn-pop]

if we are made in his image, i hope i never meet god

(i played star allies lol)

[redhotarsenic]

@nowfallc PICTURE!! FOR YOU!! PLEASE TAKE IT!! <3

[apostaterevolutionary]

Oh man, I actually haven’t been this mad at bioware in years lmao (see my last reblog if you’re seeing this without context somehow). It’s oddly refreshing. Almost comforting even. Like ah, yes, of course they did something stupid, that’s just the world working as it always has. Sky blue, water wet, bioware making an absolutely massive fumble that fills me with burning rage. Normalcy

[wickmitz]

I decided to start talking about Wick and Rocky's relationship because I like their dynamics too, I like seeing Wick scared of Rocky and Rocky being aggressive with him, which is unusual because Rocky is rarely aggressive with anyone, but of course Wick is an exception to rule

Also my mini opinion about their possible relationship, I think that if Rocky didn't have to fight for his place, then he and Wick could become friends, or at least tolerate each other a little, I also see some superficial similarities, their gentlemanly and romantic natures, and their common love for explosions (remembering the quarrymen chapter), but this is my assumption, I think that I don't understand the characters' personalities well, so I can be wrong in this assumption, something like that. So, what do you think about their relationship?

for starters, i cannot thank you enough for this ask! as i’ve said previously, i have many thoughts on these two, so it’s nice to finally be able to share some of them. although given the extent to which i think about them, i apologize in advance if this is sloppy and sort of everywhere … while i’ll try to structure things the best i can, i cannot promise i’ll succeed! but hopefully this is an enjoyable reply nonetheless.

one of my favorite things about rocky and wick’s relationship is absolutely how aggressive rocky is towards the aristocrat ; he is prone to glares and cruel jokes and borderline hissing whenever the man is within his line of sight, or can be brought to a wailing-fit over the mere mention of his name from miss m’s mouth. there is a childishness to it, but a very prominent threat as well in spite of rocky’s usual incompetence. so he goes out of his way to posture around wick, readily lying and adorning himself with the gangster drapes he so badly wants to wear, in the hopes that it intimidates … will even badmouth wick’s family and make fun of his name and rock related obsession to mitzi, and so on so forth! yet all of this is very reminiscent of schoolyard bullying rather than anything too severe, though we as the audience understand rather quickly that rocky would bash wick’s head in with a tire iron if he could. ( translation : if it wouldn’t earn the tears or hate of a certain beloved mitzi may ) and it’s all very intense despite the absence of actual violence! and i understand why many fans see this as unusual for rocky and believe that it’s only wick who makes him act so aggressively, but i’d argue it isn’t really wick at all that prompts such scary reactions from him … and that rocky is a deeply angry character who’s a.) been boiling quietly for a long, long time and b.) has turned wick into a punching bag of sorts for this inner world of resentment and hurt. basically, when he’s judging the well-to-do or poking fun, his eyes don’t look at wick and actually acknowledge him as sedgewick sable ; instead this is a being, something vague and metaphorical, who threatens to upseat rocky’s permanence in the lackadaisy and steal away his savior, and he’s had a hand in the violinist’s misfortune for a long time.

obviously, rocky doesn’t think wick robbed him of his family twice over and made him homeless, but he is channeling the fear and anguish of those events into his loathing for wick, if that makes sense? it’s easier that way -- to finally have an outlet for everything bleeding inside of you, to be able to bite and claw at something without feeling conflicted or having to take personal accountability for your own mistakes … which is something that i think rocky does struggle with to a degree. he is sort of a finger pointer! his pain has to be worth something, it has to be for someone else ; spending years homeless and losing his last bit of family was for freckle, and the scrambling of his literal brain was for mitzi, and that means he can’t ever be angry with them! well, except that he is, somewhat, but he buries it deep down instead of feeling it. with freckle there is a sense of strain between them -- an air of ‘you owe me’ from rocky to freckle as he uses freckle to appease miss m, and he constantly pokes fun at his cousin too. it’s lighter than his jabs at wick, but there’s a constant pestering, a reminder of how good freckle has it : how he’s got the mom and the house and the job and the girl most notably. i don’t think rocky is intending to come across as mean, and to his credit he hardly does! but it’s rather clear to me that some part of him, some hidden and deeply hurt part, is rather indignant about taking the fall for freckle all those years ago. which he can’t understand, because how could he? he made that choice, he decided to take accountability for something he didn’t do because he loves freckle and knows it’d be so easy to believe this family tragedy was roark’s fault ; the devilish child he was, all troublesome and too broken to properly fit anywhere. so there is a disconnect born here, where rocky can’t comprehend that he’d be angry at freckle, so instead these not so great feelings are placed elsewhere and silently boil over time. and with mitzi … i don’t think he’s angry at her per se, but there is a frustrated and desperate chorus of : why him and why not me, when i’m the one out here dying for you? which is certainly unpleasant. of course, rather than allowing those feelings to be more aimed at miss m, whom he feels unloved by, he ( again! ) represses these emotions and allows them to fester into his greatest fears and fantastical complexes. i think there is a lot of other miscellaneous anger he could have towards others too … perhaps some part of him is sore upon seeing ivy’s normal lifestyle, watching her go to university and knowing that’s been taken from him. or an ache felt when hearing stories from zib and the band and how they used to travel successfully, living as nomads, and rocky is all too reminded of his similar lifestyle and how he couldn’t make it work as effortlessly. people with immense trauma are more prone to irrational anger and jealousy, to viewing everything around them as unfair and believing it’s even more unjust that so many people get to live comfortably while they’ve suffered. a situation that gets more messy when you’re someone like rocky, a man who’s willingly made choices that have harmed himself and wants to continue on with his smiling, bumbling fool of an act. he does not want to be angry, does not want to see it within himself, i think, which leads to an accidental increase of it.

all of this is to reiterate that wick is a scapegoat for rocky and nothing more. it’s why he’s rather hypocritical whenever it concerns the man. for example, it was stated by tracy that he looks down upon wick for his excessive presence at the bar, yet he appears to enjoy hanging out with zib -- who drinks just as often! he makes fun of how all wick ever talks about is rocks, when he himself is prone to poetry rambles that people find irritating or boring, and etc etc. this is also just a human nature thing, to critique someone you heavily dislike and even going as far as to belittle things you love or do in your own day to day because you just hate them that bad! but given rocky’s willingness to befriend anyone, it more so reeks of a dehumanization element. wick is every obstacle in his way, every divine force that threatens to send him packing again, so he is equal parts unnerved by wick’s presence and angry about it. it is mostly a fear response we are seeing, an emotion that’s morphed into long held resentment and anger. so his actions are extremely defensive, with him trying to push wick far away and keep him and mitzi separate, like some sort of animal attempting to ward off a threat that’s come too close to their home. despite the loaded animosity there, this hate has hardly reached its peak … but it shall only grow more intense as things continue onward i’m afraid, since as it stands ( in the comic at least ) rocky is at an all time low … and is ten times more desperate. i’d honestly say wick has become so warped in his mind’s eye that he can only strive towards ‘winning’ over the other man, because that’s all he can see anymore. i think mitzi implying that wick willingly helped her out, the intense head injury, and rocky’s fragile emotional state is exactly what pushes him towards premeditated murder in look-see. i don’t know how people perceive that arc, but to me it’s very clear that rocky actively sought to see the deaths of wes and fish that night. going as far as to lament that he’d be, “very disappointed if ( he ) dreamed them,” and purposefully luring the marigold duo away to have freckle pick them off. while you could argue that this was a smart move, in a gangster sort of sense, there’s still no denying that rocky is oddly chipper about the whole thing and is now seeking death out ; whereas before his methods of vengeance were just, well, ruining people’s livelihood but ultimately leaving them alive. this isn’t to discredit the fact that rocky is going through something! he is in a very muddled and dark place, mentally and physically, but even tracy has said that the head injury hasn’t changed rocky’s personality -- it’s only brought things to the surface.

source : q&a with tracy .

which, yeah! makes sense! head trauma can cause a person to become a wreck emotionally ( think mood swings, irritability, etc ) but it doesn’t completely morph someone either. personality changes may occur, but it’s not like you’re being rewritten entirely, you know? and given tracy’s old statement, it’s clear that ‘personality changes’ aren’t a side effect he’s suffering from. something that adds to my beginning statement, which is that rocky is a deeply angry and troubled person, more so than fans give him any credit for.

however, to touch upon your mini opinion about these two, i actually wholeheartedly agree that rocky and wick could become friends if circumstances were different. they do in fact have many superficial similarities, but one of the more prominent things they deeply share is never really belonging in the groups they frequent. this is more overt with rocky’s character, yet wick faces it too in subtle ways. the well-to-do crowd, seen through the investors, find the gentleman to be lacking in about every place imaginable ; to them he is an obsessive freak who cares too deeply for meager rocks, something they constantly mock him for, while he’s also being noticeably set apart from the rest of them … he seems younger than the investors, more excitable, passionate, and a little less experienced, and doesn’t seem to care for money or reputation as much as them either. there is a constant rubbing between him and them, where what he enjoys is seen as wrong, such as his love for the lackadaisy and his choice in paramor, a grieving widow with extremely dangerous ties. we also know that wick doesn’t have many friends at all, with the only two he has being lacy and church ( church is listed as such on his character profile, in a sort of tongue-in-cheek way ), both of whom work for or with him. they are obliged to hang around, and while they care in varying ways, they are prone to judging him just as much. honestly, it’s not shocking that wick seeks refuge at his chosen speakeasy! but even there he is rather distant from everyone else. he doesn’t speak to zib ever in the comics, nor seems all too close with viktor, ivy, or horatio … it is merely mitzi he is close to, even if he knows of the other people who work there. and, once again, wick very obviously doesn’t fit in. he is not gangster material, could never be an atlas may replacement, much less someone who could get his paws dirty in such an active way. so he has his feet in two different worlds and doesn’t know how to fit into either of them, or which one he actually wants to fit into more. i think in many ways rocky could relate -- these are two very lonely people who wish to belong somewhere and be accepted by some group or another but go about it in all the wrong ways. wick, who is too hesitant to fully commit to what he wants and is worse off for it, and then rocky, who obsessively throws himself against what he wants until he breaks every bone in his body. they also have explosives to bond over, lol, and other miscellaneous things like their taste in women i suppose … but this potential bond adds to the tragedy of lackadaisy, where we see two people who on every level should get along but we’re burdened with the knowledge that it’s an impossibility anyway, because there’s no removing the circumstance of which they’re in.

though i like to believe that despite wick’s fear of rocky, he maintains a kindness towards him regardless. i think his worries about rocky are rather surface level … he doesn’t know the boy at all, really, and thus can’t make heads or tails of him, hence him believing the lie in balderdash. so when i’m feeling particularly self indulgent, i like imagining a world where they’re forced together and sort of ‘stuck’ together ; to which rocky finally breaks and exposes his wounds to wick, in every sense of the word, and wick finally gets him. the aggression, the possessiveness of mitzi … it is all fear and desperation and a profound sadness, things he’d sympathize with. if rocky was able to explain that he loathes wick because if he saves the lackadaisy then mitzi won’t need him anymore and that it’s not fair that wick gets to so easily fix things when rocky would give his soul for his home, for her, and how wick could render every sacrifice he’s already made for naught by smoothing things over with some greenbacks and he can’t lose this, he just can’t --! … which, well, wick is too kind of a man to be able to do anything except feel awful, even though it’s not his fault at all. here we have two people who could coexist! and they should, since rocky logically can’t do every speakeasy job ( band member, rumrunner, mitzi’s shadow, also the guy who gets the money for the hooch ) by himself, just like how wick can’t save the lackadaisy with only his cash and limited booze stash. it’d be a joint cooperation, a collaboration between them, both equally important in the grand scheme of crime’s every turning wheel … but rocky’s rage and fear won’t let him see that, and likely never will. still, in scenarios where everything ends up alright for the lackadaisy and the people involved in it ( which is not how canon will go, by the way ), i fancy wick and rocky getting better within their relationship. rocky will always be prickly and quick to upset around the other man sadly, but perhaps he could see wick in a softer kind of light. or at least understand vaguely enough that he isn’t out to get rocky, so to speak. and then maybe wick learns that pancakes soothe rocky’s ire and poorly makes them anytime he wishes to talk to the man, and other fun things like that! but you should have more confidence in your character analysis skills, because you were spot on ( at least in my eyes ) about them potentially getting along if things were different. it’s certainly a fun aspect to play around with, and is important to note when discussing their relationship so you can fully understand just how warped rocky’s perspective on things are. and how unstable and traumatized he is too, of course </3 sidenote, but i also hope that throughout everything i’ve said here, or anything i’ve said before on my blog, that my love for rocky and my own sympathy for him comes across well enough. while he’s deeply flawed and i have no qualms discussing said flaws in depth, i also don’t think of him as some insane freak who’s evil at his core or anything like that. honestly, i adore analyzing him so much as a character because of how far down his issues go! he’s very well written, i’ll say, as is wick and many of the other characters, but i digress.

once more, thank you for the ask! i’ll end this here because i fear if i don’t i’ll start going in circles, since their relationship is so vast and very important for rocky in a character sense. hopefully i shed some more light on it though! i love these two to bits and pieces and i wouldn’t be half as invested in lackadaisy if their dynamic wasn’t so monumental -- at least to me.

[emily-mooon]

To make up for the fact that I didn’t do anything for them for Christmas, here’s another fake shoujo magazine chapter cover :]

pose ref ↓

HAHA ITS FROM ITAKISS!!!! Naoki and kotoko are nothing like the blorbs but I thought this pose worked for that scene (it’s apart of a much large page split into two images, but I decided to crop it cause the rest of it doesn’t matter tbh)

[lunalikestowriteanddraw]

*watching the shorts (before actually subscribing to them)* hey, this Mace guy is kinda cute

*watching OUAW and Icebound* hey, Andy is kinda cute

*watching EOM* hey, Derek is kinda cute

[booplesnotts-art]

Teehee

The way she looks at Ada sometimes is so>>🖤🖤

(Little wip I probably won’t finish but I just love her and needed to share that again)

[lenny-zesty]

biscuitbites is one of two ships to actually make me feel more than “aw they’re cute :)”

they’ve been doomed from the start. from the moment they met they were damned by the very narrative that brought them together. damned by the narrative that will try to rip them apart. how two polar opposites come together and face the very horrors that have sunken their teeth into their pasts.

and it makes me feel something.

it feels like a wound, one that you think will get better but it just keeps hurting. it’s beautiful. it’s beautiful in a painful, agonizing way.

you want them to be happy.

but you don’t know if they’ll get that.

[emry-stars-art]

Just read the whole 'how Andreil pans out' ask and all I'm saying is that I love the idea of Andrew Courting Abram and Abram just absolutely misses that it's what is happening. Part of it is just a cultural difference, Evermore and Palmetto have different courting cultures perhaps?

Another part is that Andrew really does not act all THAT different. He's giving Abram gifts but like Andrew is always giving Abram stuff? It's not new? Yeah they had dinner together but that's just like what they......do?

Another another part is just Abram not even considering himself as someone worthy to be with Prince Andrew like that. He wasn't worthy before and after Evermore and everything I could imagine he feels even less like a person let alone a person who deserves Andrew's positive regard.

IDK I just love the idea of Abram at some point like 6 months into Andrew trying to court him seeing that behavior somewhere else, being told that's how nobility in Palmetto court others, and going to Andrew like "Have you, perchance, been trying to court me?"

Andrew setting his glass aside and looking up from where he's seated, "For 6 moons Abram, glad you've finally noticed." - @jtl-fics

jtl I. Wish. You could have seen my face as I read this, this is so hilarious and heartbreaking and lovely all in one and I’m in LOVE okay i love this so much. And we can totally make it work ahhhhh

Like yes! Yeah! Andrew’s already a gift giver, it’s just what he does as far as Abram’s concerned, and they spend so much time together that dinner isn’t strange those are perfect points. Like to the court it’s starting to become obvious - maybe in the kinds of gifts Andrew gives, or some other small things that are new, yes, but Abram has always taken these things in stride and usually his lack of judgement when Andrew tries new things or changes in little ways is a huge relief but not this time Abram PLEASE

Finally Andrew just bites the bullet and goes for a gesture that’s way more out of character and harder to mistake, which might look something like this (and thank you @leedee013 for tags about them giving each other flowers that I LOVED):

And Abram can’t really form his thoughts into words because like you said; he doesn’t think he should be allowed something like that, there’s no way he’s ever EVER going to assume that Andrew is trying to confess or clue him in to a courting like this, even if it’s in his head now

But then Lady Reynolds sees Abram later heading back to the castle/wherever he stays carrying this bouquet of carnations (fascination), narcissus (honesty/truth) and acacia (hidden love) (let’s not look too closely into these flower meanings lol, i picked the first ones I found and I’ll field all further questions with ‘artistic liberty’ 🫶) and they’re pretty close friends by now so she’s immediately like “oh my GODS Abram who gave that to you”

And Abram quietly says “the prince”

And Allison’s won like three separate bets between various other people of the court and she’s elated

But maybe she takes pity on him when she realizes exactly how clueless Abram is, so she does her best to explain everything and finally, Abram begins to allow the possibility that maybe Andrew is doing all this on purpose. But he would really rather like to be certain.

And of course I had to draw your little exchange but I did it from memory so apologies for the changes in dialogue but I love it:

ANYWAY from there, when it’s cleared up, it’s just them being dumb and sweet and grasping at straws for how to be in love and natural about it (because they’re both very private people and a good number of average/expected acts of courtship aren’t necessarily in their wheelhouse) 😭🥹 and not to add yet more hurt/comfort but Andrew is so so determined to figure out a way to assure and reassure Abram that he knows what he’s doing, yes Abram is worth it, yes he’s doing these things because he wants to. If he didn’t want to he wouldn’t be doing it in the first place. And I’ll bring it back around by using my previously mentioned artistic liberty to say that yes Prince Andrew loves having his hands held/kissed (just by Abram naturally) and Abram figures this out and absolutely uses it against him. They love each other your honor

Okay anyway thank you for the ask, I’m SO lucky to have such brilliant people in my inbox 🥰

[mushroominaforest]

My heart is broken I will never recover/j

I had a very strong vibe that ppl were gonna dislike Wenda 😭 Most of my rambling were bc I was hoping people wouldn’t hate how I did her character lol

Anyways I’m gonna ramble more bc I desperately need people to like or at least understand my ideas lmfao

My au obviously isn’t going to be as gruesome or dark as canon, but Wenda is still going to hurt people. If I was just making a chill high school situation then yeah I’d probably change her vibe. But I need someone sorta evil for this!

I couldn’t really think of a different way to make someone who’d be willing to do bad things to people for petty or shallow reasons without making her a “outcast with low empathy cause mental illness” character, which I didn’t want to do for obvious reasons.

So instead I went for the mean girl stereotype. A rude, rich, bully who thinks she’s better than everyone else. That’s the most reasonable character to make evil in my opinion, because I know people like that and they can be downright horrendous to the people they target.

If I do continue with this au publicly (I already have a lot of ideas and writing and stuff for it but it might just be for me cause I’m a coward lmao) then it’ll probably make more sense.

[juniperhillpatient]

a good soup can fix you like actually solve all your problems & make everything ok. If you don’t believe me you haven’t had the right soup.

[slythernnn]

Decided to hop on the Hozier challenge bandwagon lol

[ronsenburg]

sorry for posting about such tiny writing victories on here all the time. I get that the things that I’m celebrating are minuscule compared with the volume that a lot of other writers (or even myself, three years ago) regularly produce and that the content overall is pretty trivial. but, at this point, it isn’t really even about writing anymore.

it’s so crazy (sarcasm) but having a kid is really hard! not even the physical elements of gestating a human being or dealing with the way life changes after you become a parent. I really didn’t expect the psychological side of it, I guess? I got pregnant in 2021, had a miscarriage, and then got pregnant again right away after and the hormonal changes from all that fucked me up. I’m not exaggerating at all when I say that one day, 18 months after my baby was born, I stepped out of a mental fog deep enough that I couldn’t recognize the person I’d been for that last year and a half. that chunk of time is just amorphous in my brain. between the lack of sleep, continued hormone fluctuation insanity, and inability to take some of my meds, I was like a shell of the person I’d been at the beginning of 2021. I literally had no space in my brain for anything other than taking care of that baby. anything that brought me joy before, any hobbies I had, just… hadn’t mattered. if it was postpartum depression, it was a really weird kind that allowed me to feel happy and optimistic about the future and very much in love with the tiny human I’d brought into the world. I just wasn’t me anymore. the craziest part was that it wasn’t an experience unique to me? a lot of the other moms I talked to about it on the other side were like ‘haha, yeah, that got me too!’ even my therapist kind of hand waved it off as normal. and??? why isn’t this something we talk about???

anyway, last october, I finally snapped out of it and started to try and chisel out some space in my new life for the person I’d been before the baby. it’s been really difficult—I don’t get much time for myself and when I do, if I don’t spend it cleaning or prepping activities and play dates, I end up feeling really guilty. I can’t stress enough how much I genuinely enjoy being a mom and how fortunate I feel to spend as much time as I do with my kid, I just also feel like there needs to be room for me to be something outside of that as well, you know?

now it feels like every time I’m able to write anything, I’m getting to step a little further back into the things that made me happy before. even if it’s not very good or not very much, it’s progress towards finding balance. so I’m probably going to keep posting about it here and celebrating all those little things. thanks for putting up with me while I do ❤️

[trying-to-jew]

Deeply tired (but unsurprised) sigh

[lunalikestowriteanddraw]

I NEED the Krew to actually TALK about what happened in episode 46. (Spoilers under the cut)

And I don’t mean them mentioning that it happened but “it’s all fine now because they’re alive!” Because I imagine that shit scarred all of them, one way or another. Frost especially.

I don’t care HOW the conversation happens, but it does need to happen. They each need to have that closure, rather than letting those thoughts and feelings swirl in their minds for all eternity. And I don’t just mean in fanfic or whatever. No, it needs to happen sometime in canon, when they have a moment to talk about it in-depth (so probably post-canon, all things considered).

I just…I need Frost to tell them how it felt, watching as all his friends fall around him, and how he couldn’t do anything. I imagine he still gets nightmares about it, especially for the first few nights after the fact, and I imagine he wakes up from those nightmares and probably goes and cuddles up next to Gricko (after making sure he’s breathing. Even if, logically, Frost KNOWS that Gricko is alive and breathing—he’s snoring, shifting around, whatever—he still needs to check. Just in case), as if to confirm to himself that, yes, they’re here. Theyre alive. He’s not alone.

I need Torbek to talk about how he feels like he’s not good enough in battle. How he kicks himself for not being able to control the Witchlight better, for not being able to bring out the Other. Because maybe, just maybe, if he was somehow able to bring out the Other in that fight, maybe they would’ve had a chance (they still wouldn’t, it would still end the same, and Torbek knows it deep down, but he kicks himself all the same)

I need Gricko to lament about how he thinks he’s not a good enough healer. He’s supposed to keep his friends from dying, and he couldn’t even do that right. Maybe if he had gotten to Gideon sooner, maybe if he had realized that Gideon was already long gone before he pumped his last spell slot into him. How he regrets that Hootsie wasn’t spared. Maybe if he had told her to run sooner, faster, maybe, just maybe, she would’ve made it out alive. Maybe. Or, at the very least, he wouldn’t have had to hear her yelps right before he fell unconscious himself. He’s supposed to be her father, he’s supposed to protect her. But he didn’t. Couldn’t. Just like he couldn’t protect his friends.

I need Kremy to tell Gideon how it felt to watch his best friend, his husband, get ripped apart before his very eyes, and being unable to stop it. Unable to help in any way. How he couldn’t imagine ever living in a world without Gid. After all, what’s the point of living when your reason for waking up each day is long gone? Someone else could pay his debt, surely.

I want Gideon to lament about just how useless he feels. With the mixture of being unable to help Twig in episode 41, turning into a stupid useless dancing mushroom (where he was the slowest because he traded the rhythm in his step away, and his friends had to help push him along), losing some of his fire (sure, he gained it back, but for several hours he felt colder. Weaker.), and then being the first one down during the Jabberwock fight? He’s supposed to be the strong one, the fighter, yet time and time again his friends are the ones protecting him. Keeping him alive while he keeps throwing himself into danger. He could’ve killed the Jabberwock, surely. With the help of Torbek, sure, but it would’ve died! It just got the jump on him, is all.

I just…I need them to talk, when they get the chance to. They deserve that much. To reassure themselves and their friends that everything is okay. They’re alive, and they’re not going to just abandon each other. Not again. Even if they feel weak, or useless, or like they could be so much more if they were just better. They all know now what it feels like to lose their family, their best friend, the love of their life, their everything. And I don’t think they’ll ever let themselves or each other experience that again. Not for a very long time, at least.