#yall are insufferable sometimes

[terraliensvent]

multiple ppl close to kinah were able to verify that they were in the hospital recovering when the attempt happened. all of those ppl could not collab and lie so one person could get “extra attention” in ur words. Im frustrated with terra staff aswell but that doesn’t mean its ok now to call someones suicide attempt fake so ur feelings seem more valid. I find that extremely sickening. U have zero evidence or good reason for doubt or else u would have vented about it already. all u have is ur feefees. u do need therapy. And mod pls stop validating baseless speculation on smth so serious. what happened 2 people needing proof for claims like this

alright yeah im deleting kinah asks now

first off i dont think that people should just believe whatever they read on the internet, because you dont know who these people are irl. again, thats not to say that you shouldnt give support where you can or that you should make public callouts saying that it was all fake when you dont know for sure, BUT at the same time theres a level of speculation regardless because its the fucking internet. people are wild, people are strangers, and there is a non zero chance that people could have lied. just because people have a level of speculation on something they read online, that doesnt mean they need therapy and it doesnt mean theyre a bad person, it means they have a brain. if YOU want to believe it without a shadow of a doubt then thats fine, and if other people have some doubt thats also fine, just dont go out of your way to fucking bother people because thats just unnecessary.

second off, i need proof for accusations like “so and so is posting feral” or “so and so is an abuser,” saying things like “the way that kinah bounced back into cs makes me speculate” isnt an accusation.

the views of the anons i post here arent reflective of my own views, and if something is a problem i give my own input on it in my response. when i created this blog i didnt want to delete asks because i feel like that controls a narrative and makes me an unreliable narrator when it comes to these discussions. if people want to talk about things like this, i didnt want to force silence because thats not how you hold a discussion.

as an additional note: anons have been becoming increasingly aggressive in my inbox, whether its towards one another or towards myself. i implore all of you to stop being so aggressive, stop making assumptions, and stop playing this holier than thou card. so much of the art and cs community is made up of people who will virtue signal and place themselves on a moral pedestal and my inbox is the last place for that. if you want to rant and complain, go ahead, but stop acting like youre better than each other because you have the Correct Opinion on everything and believe everything you read on the internet.

my final thoughts on this are as follows: there is a non zero chance that everyone is lying. is it a small chance? sure. does this mean we should spread the narrative that it was all fake? no. are you a horrible person who should die in a fire because you dont 100 percent believe that the attempts were real? no, but also dont go out of your way to be an asshole because of that belief. i think we should all publicly operate under the assumption that the attempts were real. if you want to privately speculate, go fucking wild. could kinah going back into cs and making stuff for terras possibly be bad for their mental health? maybe. but also, its none of our business. and thats what im ending this topic with, a lot of this shit really is just none of our business and i think you all give way too much of a fuck about someone who you will never know irl.

i dont dislike kinah, in fact i actually really liked them when they were on staff for terras. but at some point we all gotta throw our arms up and say why is this taking up so much of my brain power when this person is just someone i follow on fucking toyhouse.

we are done with asks about kinahs attempt now, unless anyone has important info or something new to say im deleting them.

[vizishereig]

TO ALL OF THE COOL FANFIC WRITERS WHO FOLLOW ME:

every time one of you follow me, I freak out a little bc I view y'all as like... So Cool. I need you to know this. you guys are fucking amazing. <3

[maineventbts]

yall think triple h isn’t a good booker because he doesn’t make the decisions that you want him to make.

obviously , there are problems in storylines and many times they’ve dropped the ball with stuff. but yall like to say “you guys only tolerate this because Vince isn’t in charge anymore,” anytime your fav loses a match. you’re not even being constructively critical , you’re just mad.

you can be upset at the direction they choose to go in but yall like to take it up another notch and it’s annoying.

[dandyshucks]

blinks tiredly. i decide "hm maybe i should try to expand my circle and step outside of it a little, lets go look at the main community tags" and im just greeted with a bunch of edgelords who think saying "fiction doesn't affect reality, don't like don't read" is peak activism and "fighting censorship". head in my hands. this is partially why i do not ever go into the community tags, my nervous system cannot handle blocking fifty weirdos every single day just so i can have a normal experience in the community tags hfdsjkl

[strawberryscorp]

i have two wolves inside of me. one of them tells me to draw scorbus and says that i really will do it this time and ive done it before why wont i just do it for the girls and the gays the tumblr fans are starving please babygir and the other makes me paint koi fish

[airlock]

I'm not sure how transparent people think they're not being when they go "ah, at long last! before, I was willing to extend this trans girl on the internet my Magnanimous Forbearance even though she has Flaws and her Vibes Are Off, because I truly and totally respect trans women. but now! now I am free! for you see, I have been given half of an excuse rooted on blatant misinformation, and"

[magnoliamyrrh]

.

[notsociallyacceptablealex]

Ok so I made a post the other day about two characters, one canonly bisexual and the other textually bisexual bc the character had been with men before and then was choosing to stay with the canon bi -- and some fucking ho decided to be like "the man wasn't even relevant." You fucking asshole, sometimes the people we fuck are irrelevant, that doesn't make someone less bisexual. God damn. Sometimes, *sometimes*, I really fucking hate lesbians. And I'm not even mad if this individual headcanons differently, I fucking hate them for coming onto my original post like I should change my headcanon. God, sometimes, *SOMETIMES*, I just just really hate yall. Good fucking for you that your sexuality is on its far end of an extreme, MINES NOT, GO MAKE YOUR OWN FUCKING POSTS. I'M BISEXUAL, MAKING MY OWN BISEXUAL POST ABOUT A CHARACTER THAT *HAS* BEEN WITH MEN AND IS NOW WITH A WOMAN. Fuck. This just makes me want to go find every canon lesbian character post on your blog and just be annoying and be like, "she looked at that guy, she's now bisexual actually." FUCK OFF do you even realize how annoying you fucking are??? Go play in traffic or maybe mind your own fucking business and make you own posts. Ugh. This is a kys moment. Your soul is fucking ugly. I hope you get no bitches. Die alone until you learn to stay in your own lane. Assholes. Yall really think it's just "straight and gay." Your world is so small. I'd pity you if I didn't want to fucking throttle you more than pity. Take a long walk off a short pier. Fuck off.

[can-of-pringles]

Jedi never know when to mind their business

[dinogoofymutated]

Hey not sure if your currently taking requests but I just wanted to I soooooo stoked that you write for Remy! I've been starved for years cuz there's like no fan fics for him😭.

anyway I was wondering if you could do like a fic or headcannon where gambit somehow got hurt on a mission and is on bed rest but is also like really horny because you wont have sex with his since hes hurt.

If not that's fine I just thought it up and thought it would be hilarious 😂. Anyway luv your work, keep it up😘

NSFW!Gambit/AFAB!Reader

MMMMMHHHMMMMMM BESTIE UR MIND. ABSOLUTE GENIUS. I hope that you don't mind I did make it NSFW there at the end but the majority is just teasing our favorite gambler. Also, This is for the folks who were also really attracted to that one scene in criminal minds with the bulletproof vest. iykyk.

TWs: teasing, sexual innuendos, explicit smut, Handjobs, Mutual masturbation, PNV sex. Raw sex. (Wrap it bf you tap it yall) Creampie. Reader written with Fem! pronouns.

"Asolutetly not." You're quick to say it. Gambit pouts as the words leave your mouth, still on the infirmary bed with all the wires and doodads still hooked up to him. He's giving you those scoundrel puppy eyes that he knows you usually give in to, but you're not willing to budge this time.

"No, Remy. I will not be-" You take a quick glance around the room, leaning in a little closer as you begin to whisper-yell at him. "-I will not be having sex with you right now!" Remy sighs in a pitiful way leaning against the headboard in your direction. You can’t begin to look him in the eyes right now, instead lightly pushing his face away from your spot, sitting close to his bed on a chair that you had moved from the corner. His pout turns into an amused smile, as he instead takes your hand in his own, moving it down to press a kiss to your palm. You try not to blush at him. You’re supposed to be standing strong, dammit! 

  "Come on, Chère. S' not like it's gonna make Gambit hurt any worse-” You cut him off by lightly slapping his abdomen. Remy immediately flinches, curling in on himself with a pained groan. You feel a little guilty afterward, flattening your palm to rub the area soothingly.

    “Yes, it would. Remy, I could seriously hurt you. You heard beast, any vigorous activity could rip your stitches.” You say, moving to where you can sit on the bed, facing him. You cup the side of his face, gently moving stray locks out of the way. He rolls his eyes, not at you, but at the memory of the talking-to he got when he had woken up in the infirmary. 

    “Never stopped me before. Since I been with the X-men it’s like everythin’ become a big deal. So what if I rip a few stitches here an’ there?” Remy grumbles. You give him a stern look, before leaning in to kiss his temple. He melts into your touch.

    “It is a big deal, Remy. You need to heal. End of discussion.” You say gently. Remy thinks on it for a moment, before giving you a slight smirk. 

    “And by “end of discussion” you really mean “Until Gambit tempts me into bed”, Right?” He says. You roll your eyes at him before standing. If that’s the attitude he’s going into these next weeks with, you know for a fact he’s going to be insufferable.

    You were right. The incoming weeks were almost as much torture to you as they most definitely were to him. Wherever you went in the mansion, Gambit was sure to follow. He’d be in the kitchen while you would be cooking, unable to help due to doctor's orders, but no one ever said that he had to stay out of the kitchen. He’s come up behind you, snaking his arms around your hips as he’d “Give you pointers”. He’d lean close and whisper in your ear, sometimes giving it a nip or two. But one thing about Gambit is that every time you turned him away, or laughed at him and told him to sit down, he’d get pouty. 

    That was a trend that continued. He’d deliberately go out of his way to tease you, on movie night, in the library, in the showers even. And every time, despite how hot under the collar you might have been, you turned him away. The more bothered you seemed to be however, his pouts turned into smirks. Eventually, you got fed up with it. You were trying to be a good girlfriend and make sure Remy didn’t hurt himself, but if he was going to be a brat about it, you could be a brat too.

    You started off a little more subtly than Remy did. Lingering touches here and there, kissing him just long enough to leave him wanting. You’d wear just a tad less clothing around him, or wear slightly lower-cut tops. You were beginning to realize just how easy it was to get him riled up.

    One particular day, the tension was thick in the air, having coalesced into something barely breathable. Remy was lying back on the bed on his elbows as you redressed his wound, making sure to spread ointment onto the healing stitches and care for the skin. You frequently found yourself drawn to the sight of his lower abs, the large bruise having begun to yellow as it healed. Maybe it was the fact that you hadn't seen his skin in a while, but the sight of him had you breathing a little funny. Remy was also a little quieter than normal, unable to look away from your gentle hands as you took care of him.

    Once you finished, you lingered by his side, a hand pressed against his chest. You look up to find him already watching you, but neither of you says anything. You purse your lips, debating on whether or not you’re doing what you think you’re about to do. Remy tilts his head at you questioningly. He opens his mouth to speak but fails to do so as your hand trails down to his waistband. He takes a shocked breath through his nose, his eyes fluttering shut for a moment before he’s looking at you again through a lustful haze. 

    “Thought you said-”

    “Shut up.” You sigh, cutting him off. Remy smirks at you, biting his lip. You roll your eyes, caressing the crotch of his pants a few times before you begin to slip them off of him.

    “Don’t get too excited.” You whisper, but really it sounds more like a needy sigh. “Just a handy, okay?” Gambit huffs a laugh at you, but doesn’t tease. He's practically bucking his hips into your hand when you finally take hold of his cock, stroking him to hardness. You can’t seem to look away from the sight, watching as his abdomen clenches with every stroke from base to tip. You twist your hand on the upstroke, listening as Remy lets out a curse and a sudden moan just as you thumb his head, collecting his abundant precum as you use it to stroke back down again. 

    “You’re really pent up, huh?” You ask in a heated whisper. Remy’s head is tilted back in pleasure, and he huffs in amusement as he cracks an eye open at you. His hand slides up your thigh, Your legs being pressed against each other tightly to find some friction. You gasp as he suddenly slides two of his fingers up the inside seam of your pants, and you can practically feel yourself get wetter at the touch. 

    “Looks like I’m not the only one.” Remy hums. You can’t seem to pull away from him as he continues to stroke you. The air is hardly breathable, and the burning in your chest and your core starts to become too hot to ignore. 

    “Fuck it.” You say. Remy is confused when you let go of him, only to break into a wide smile when he realizes you were beginning to strip. The shirt is first to go, before your bra, and then your jeans and underwear. Remy wolf-whistles at the sight, and you wave him off, embarrassed. 

    “Couldn’t stay away from the temptation of Remy LeBeau, Now could you Chère?” Remy muses. He’s such a goof. You try to hide your smile as you carefully straddle his legs, making sure to avoid his sore spots. One of his hands holds onto your upper thigh, the other making its way to your center. He strokes you languidly with his fingers before circling your slit and pushing two inside. You suck in a breath, careful to set your hands on his shoulders without putting any weight onto them. 

    “Looks like this pretty pussy missed me as much as I missed you,” Remy says breathlessly. His eyes flicker from your cunt up to your bare breasts, and then to your flushed face. You feel like you’re falling apart too quickly, already climbing that high as he fingers you with those hands you love so much.

    “Remy,” You call for him breathlessly. “ m’ not gonna last too long.” Remy can't help himself any longer, and pulls you closer to catch you in a passionate kiss. He drags his teeth across your bottom lip, letting go of the plush skin. He doesn't withdraw his fingers until your thighs begin to shake and you start to clench down on him. You whine as he does so, barely holding your composure. Remy takes your hand off of his cock, pressing a kiss to your knuckles before gently dragging your hips further into his lap. Your mind is hazy, but you know to be careful as he lines himself up.

    “If we're going to do this, we're taking it my speed, okay?” You say. Remy nods, barely taking in the information. He was ready to be inside you. After weeks of nothing- all he could think about was you. Your giggles, your smiles. Your body. The way you taste on his tongue. The feeling of your thighs clenching around his head.  Remy would do anything you asked of him at this moment.

    You take it slow as you lower yourself down on his cock. The stretch of him feels delicious against your inner walls. Remy leans in, kissing and sucking on your breasts as you take your time. He bottoms out with a wet sound, his hands resting against your upper thighs.

    Remy curses as you begin to move, bouncing on his cock somewhat slowly. Even in the haze of your lust, you're worried about hurting him. Remy, on the other hand, doesn't share the same sentiment. His hands clench around your thighs, and when he can't seem to take the slow speed anymore, he slams you down onto him.

    You gasp at the action, and apologies spill from his lips as he tilts you forward, knocking your balance so you're forced to lean onto him as he controls the pace, eagerly thrusting into your heat. 

    “Remy-” Your protests are cut off with a kiss as your favorite scoundrel begins to take exactly what he wants. His grunts and moans beneath you send another trickle of warmth inside of you. To be honest, seeing him take control like this was hot- almost hot enough for you to forgive the fact that he was certainly overexerting himself- but it was hard to be mad at him when he's fucking you so good.

    One thing about Remy is that he's a talker in bed. If anything, you were surprised he was as “quiet” as he had been the majority of the time. But once he started to get closer to his peak, Remy began to ramble. 

    "You think you're smart? -Ah! Teasing me like that.. mmh… expecting me to just take it?" You're not really paying attention to his words, nodding in response while only thinking about his steady grip on your thighs and ass and the peak you're reaching so quickly. Remy squeezes you harder, almost harshly as he begins to take you faster. His hips begin to stutter, thrusts starting to do him in one by one. 

    Remy lets out a loud groan as he reaches his peak, burying himself deeply inside you and thumbing your clit. He continues to thrust as he helps you reach that white-hot peak of pleasure, pressing kisses to your temple as you ride it out on top of him. By the time you're both fully finished, you're panting for air. You're fully collapsed onto Remy's chest, Remy being absolutely boneless as he rests against the headboard. 

    “You’re such an idiot.” You say when you finally have enough sense. Remy just chuckles, continuing to press kisses to every part of your face and neck he can reach. You sigh happily as he does so, pressing some of your own kisses to his shoulder.

    When you finally peel yourself off of his chest, the first thing you check in on is his bandages. You scowl when you see that they've been soaked through with sweat, but more concerning is the spot of red that has started to form. You look up at Remy with narrowed eyes, and he quickly looks down as well, before looking back up at you and simply shrugging with a gleeful smile.

    “Casualty of love, Chère.”

[zhongrin]

01101100011011110110000101100100011010010110111001100111001011000010000001100110011101010110001101101011011010010110111001100111

(binary to text converter)

◇ characters ◇ zhongli, al haitham, capitano, childe

◇ tags ◇ minors dni, afab!reader, chubby!reader, self aware android au, overstimulation (zhongli al haitham), period sex (al haitham), oral (giving / al haitham), inhuman features (capitano), did (childe | tartaglia), sadistic tendencies (tartaglia)

◇ a/n ◇ i have no words ya girl filthy and i blame it to the zhongli sisterwives coalition for enabling me (if yall see this, ily <3). also - obligatory tag to crys @crystalflygeo bc i feel like she'll set off a feral al haitham at me if i don't tag her /aff /silly. lastly no i definitely don't play favorites wdym

𝑚𝑎𝑠𝑡𝑒𝑟𝑙𝑖𝑠𝑡 ⬙ 𝑡𝑎𝑔𝑙𝑖𝑠𝑡

handsome, elegant, gentle, and overall the perfect partner. from the random geology facts to his massages and specially blended teas, zhongli is the ideal android companion you could ever splurge on. he’s an expensive model and will break your bank, plus, his various dlcs and extensions - ranging from his alter personality “morax” which is brasher and rougher on the edges to the several… ‘attachments’ you could purchase to enhance his ‘performance’ - could probably get you into debt if you’re not careful.

but really, it barely matters when he manages to fuck you just fine with his standard out-of-the-box attachment. he’s as rough as you want him to be, yet at the same time he kisses you like you’re the most precious gem he’s ever unearthed and he’s not pounding you against your bedroom door. your knees buckle and your voice cracks around the edges as you scream his name for the hundredth time that night, the way he’s bullying into your sweetest spot making you gush yet again.

he’s perpetually hard as he helps you come down from your high, and the circle in his amber eyes spins as he loads the data from your smartwatch in a matter of milliseconds.

“2092 calories... hmm. i suppose you’ve met your goal for today….”

zhongli bends down to press a tender kiss to your sweaty forehead. and for a moment you sink into post-climax bliss, feeling warm and satiated and a lot less stressed than when you first started-

he smirks when your whole body jolts as his finger starts to slowly rub your swollen bud, hips gently moving to set a slow pace to not overstimulate you too much. although he had to say he was tempted to do so, with the indecent sound you’re making from both your upper and lower set of lips.

”… but what say you we go for more? after all… you’re most sensitive when you’re on the peak of your fertile days - such as today, yes?”

your android is very very strange, you decide. but then again his personality is described as “a tad insufferable” on the label so you guessed teyvat⟡robotics is at least being honest. for one, al haitham is very punctual with his ‘working hours’ - in fact, it was the very first thing he asked when you turned him on. anything after his ‘office hours’, and he gives you the insufferable roommate treatment. he also prefers to read physical books instead of using his supercomputer brain to look up information. he’s also very seemingly apathetic about a lot of things, and sometimes it drives you crazy… just like now.

“you said you wanted the cramps to hurt less. now stay still.”

he seems to not give any fuck about all the period blood smeared over his synthetic skin as he brings you over the edge for the third time tonight.

granted he could just turn off his smell and taste sensor, but you were pretty sure the vivid lust in his verdant green optics with a diamond of terracotta of his activity bar must be a glitch in his code. with muscled arms hugging your plump thighs, he buried himself further into your cunt, humming when he felt you clench around his tongue amidst his ministrations. they vibrate and fucks your sweetest spot with such precision and speed - and with each climax, it gets harder and harder to think.

go ahead, tug on his hair all you want - he’s just doing what you’ve instructed him to do. and what is he if not exemplary at his job? hell - perhaps if it’s for this, he wouldn’t mind working overtime.

“when i’m done with you, you won’t be able to feel any pain, let alone think.”

previously a unit made for war, the capitano model is intimidating - and that’s an understatement. he’s tall, bulky, rigged with many alien-like features, and would probably get stuck on your house’s doorways, but what most people don’t know since they don’t bother reading his manual is that he’s utterly soft and gentle to his owner. in this case, namely, you.

and you’re glad that he is because the sinful way his thick fingers are stirring your sloppy pussy and fucking your mouth was already making you see stars. long thick tongue slithered out from his ‘mouth’ behind the crevasse of his helmet, wrapping around your breast and flicking your hardened nipple, a guttural purr that sounded both mechanical and otherworldly seemingly making the air vibrate.

he hums when you beg for his girthy manhood, and his fingers scissor your walls as he gauges your reactions. capitano grunts and chuckles, gentle yet with a dark undertone behind it as he taps onto your clit and fucks you deeper with his fingers.

“not yet. you’re not ready, my little human. maybe after you give me two more orgasms.”

the general consensus is that ajax is the cutest companion one could ever get from the market, and you used to agree with that sentiment. he’s sweet and cheerful, cooks you the best homemade meals, and knows when to hold you when you feel too stressed.

if only your curious soul didn’t hack into his program that one night out of curiosity. if only you hadn’t found the commented-out section amongst the lines of codes in his program. if only-

tartaglia is meaner - a lot meaner, in fact. ajax holds your hand like you’re a bubble rising on top of the water's surface which can pop any moment, but tartaglia pins them onto your mattress in a tight grip to prevent you from escaping. ajax's focus is to please you and make you feel like royalty who's in for a good time - tartaglia’s focus is on how loud you can scream in pleasure for him, how many times you can come undone by his hands compared to ajax, and he thrives by hearing his name falling from your lips as your eyes cross and your cunt spasms around his length.

too sensitive? too much? you can’t?

“but babe…. doesn’t it feel even better when there’s a little bit of pain mixed with the pleasure?”

© zhongrin | 2023 ◆ no repost. reblogs much appreciated. feel free to reach out to submit suggestions, feedback, comments, or if you just want to talk!

◇ taglist ◇ @thestarsofenkanomiya | @genshinparty | @abyssmal-skies | @hamdehlesmis | @depressivecomforts | @sophiethewitch1 | @why-am-i-here-someone-save-me | @sunnshineflxwer | @heartonthemoon | @yuutasbabe | @percyval-archives | @carbs-need-more-love | @rebeccka | @queen-belial | @stygianoir | @silentmoths | @niktwazny303 | @dustofthedailylife | @herdrops | @diebischesther | @marina-and-the-memes | @angryhope | @mixed-kester | @shuangxo | @fiannee | @lordbugs | @anonymousficreader | @shizunxie | @ladylofspades | @sup-zfam | @ansy-tea | @irethepotato | @nachotrash | @algrimmammon | @sassy-cat-in-town | @syrenkitsune | @smokipoki | @pvbbyb0y

[kazbrekkerscrutches]

Spencer Reid - We Shouldn't Be Doing This

Warnings: smut themes but no actual smut, fed!spencer x enemyfed!reader, enemies to something (let u pick babes), insults, angst, one-bed trope (ur welcome)

This is Spencer in the more recent seasons, but you can picture him in your preferred season.

Word count: 1.6k

Summary: Y/N and Spencer have never liked each other. They are always competing over who's the smartest, who's the most handy with a gun. Yet, when they're sent on a mission and they end up in a motel room with one bed, things get interesting.

A/N: Yall are gonna love this. This is inspired by this. Thank you for that. The girlies are gonna love this one! Thanks for reading <3. Let me know ur feedback! @hereforhalstead thank u for the idea.

I had started working at the BAU for a couple of years. I got along fine with the girls, JJ and Emily. Garcia was my girl, hyping me up and helping me with anything. Most of the boys were fine too, Morgan made me laugh until I couldn’t breathe, Hotch was like a big brother to me and Rossi was a father figure to me. But there is one guy that was very insufferable and the only person in the BAU that I could not stand. Dr Spencer Reid. 

Don’t get me wrong, he’s a very attractive man. Yet he is the most infuriating person I have ever met. 

He didn’t seem to like me too, when I joined the BAU. He looked at me with dark eyes. His hair was always messy, his snarky attitude made me want to kill him sometimes. 

After joining the FBI for about six months, Spencer and I were competing against each other all the time. It didn’t matter if the subject was mentioned, we were already arguing on who was the smartest. He kept making the remarks about his IQ, his eclectic memory and the fact that he could read 20 000 words per minute. 

It didn’t matter what I told him, he kept laying it on thick. He kept trying to prove to the entire world that no one could be smarter than him.

One day, Hotch and Rossi had enough of us screaming and arguing all the time. They sent us on a light care in New Jersey, about a girl who escaped a convicted killer. 

This is just fucking perfect. Now I’m stuck with the encyclopedia. I tell myself. I bet he wasn’t happy too, just by the look on his face. He looked like he was boiling on the inside. His face was red, his hair looking worse than usual and streams practically coming out of his ears. 

We got into a car, driving us to the airport. Total silence filled the car, neither of us daring to start an argument. We got out of the car after a while, heading into the jet and off to New Jersey.

It took about two hours to get there. My headphones were placed on my ears, reading the file of the young woman who escaped. I could see Spencer playing with a coin, not really doing anything. 

When the jet landed, we got into another car. We arrived late at night, meaning the interview with the girl would have to be in the morning. 

The car dropped us to a motel, where Hotch and Rossi had reserved a room for us. The lady in the front desk gave me the keys, both of us walking towards our room in silence. I could feel his stare burning the side of my head. 

As I opened the room, I was the first to see that the room was missing something. 

There’s only one bed.

I swore under my breath. Spencer saw it next, shutting the door behind me. 

“You’ve got to be kidding me.” I heard him say. 

Rossi had planned this, he had to. He planned for us to get away, fix our issues and get back to Quantico like nothing was wrong between us. 

I dropped my bag on the chair beside the window. “This is just wonderful.” I mumbled sarcastically. 

I earned one of Spencer’s glares. “What? You think I want this more than you do?” I look at him, not amused by Rossi’s ruse. 

He drops his bags, taking off his coat and suit jacket. “I would’ve preferred to sleep on the concrete than to share a bed with you. I bet it would be much more comfortable.” 

I scoffed, taking off my coat and dropping it on the chair. “Right in with the fire, mh? You like that, to get me fired up and all ready to insult you. What’s your fucking problem?” I speak with a harsher tone, anger clearly lacing my throat. 

“What’s my problem? You’re an arrogant idiot who barged into the BAU like it was your living room! You’re intolerable, Y/N! You know that?” He practically spit in my face.

“Oh, so now I’m the problem. Please, Dr Reid, tell me all of the remarks you have against me.” I say, stepping closer to him, looking up at his stern face. His breathing has gotten faster, his hands in fists by his side. 

“You’re ignorant, selfish. You only care about yourself and that small head of yours. You try to make yourself smarter than everyone else! Just because you went to fucking Stanford doesn’t mean your Einstein.” He started walking closer to me, anger radiating off of him. 

“What else? Hm?” I whisper, my voice stern and angry. I didn’t care what he thought of me. His opinion was the last thing I cared about. 

“You’re a spoiled little girl who got everything she wanted in her whole life. You got the job, the looks, the money. Everything. You didn’t work a single day in your life to earn all of that.” He grabbed onto my forearms, clenching his fists entirely against my wrists. He had pushed them behind my back, pinning me to the wall behind them. His voice got quieter, still angry and venomous. 

“Fuck you, Reid.” I whisper in his face, my face clearly affected by his words. My breathing has quickened too, my pulse fast and hard in my chest. My cheeks were flushed, the heat of his chest radiating off of me. “You’re telling me this for what, hm? To get me to hate you? Because, trust me, I already do. You’re a selfish prick, who only cares about how smart you are compared to the world. No wonder you can’t get anyone to stay with you.” I tell him angrily, his hands twisting around my forearms, untwisting them from my back and pulling them flush against his chest.

His blood was practically boiling. I could feel his hot breath on my face, his eyes burning with fury. “You better shut up before I make you shut up, Y/N.” He whispered roughly. 

I raised my eyebrow, testing his patience. “Or what? You’ll have me arrested? You can’t do that.” I whisper, close to his face. I don’t think he could’ve gotten more mad than he already was but boy I was wrong. 

He slammed his lips against mine, releasing my wrists to grab my face roughly. His hands claimed dominance on my jaw, sliding into my hair and pulling it. His mouth was engulfing mine, his tongue deep in my mouth. I melted into his touch, his rough hold on me making me release the madness against him. His lips left my lips, melting down to my neck. He left heated kisses, making my head lean back on the wall. His teeth grazed my neck, nibbling it and licking it with his wicked tongue. 

My hands clinged on his chest, the hardness of it under my fingers. His chest flexed under my harsh touch, my hands going all the way to his back and his slutty waist I had been eyeing for months. His breath was hot and sweaty on my neck, suddenly taking a bite into my neck, making me whimper softly. 

His lips left my neck, lifting his head to speak directly on my lips. “I hate you so much that it makes me love you.” He whispered on my lips, kissing me harshly with his hands around my jaw. 

He pulled me off the wall, his hands roaming down to my thighs and lifting them up to his waist. My hands went in his hair, his sharp jaw and all of the hot skin I could touch. 

He sat down on the bed, taking me on his lap. His hands were all over me, on my waist down to my hips and ass. He groped anything he could find. My lips went on his neck, tilting his head to give me better access. I found his sweet spot, making him cry out, moaning into my shoulder. He whispered in my ear, “We shouldn’t be doing this, Y/N.” His voice was rough and needy at the same time. 

“Everything about you tells me otherwise, Spencer.” I whisper roughly, kissing back up to his jaw, my hips set over his. He pulled my hips flush on his, a gasp leaving my mouth.

“Fuck it.” He mumbled under his breath, switching positions to set me under him, his tie falling on my chest. Both of us were hot and sweaty, our breaths labored and heart pounding. His hips were set harshly on mine, feeling every single inch of him. 

I grabbed his tie, pulling him closer to my face. “You’re not lying?” I whispered, my eyes fiery but not angered. He knotted his eyebrows slightly. “About what?” He mumbled softer than usual.

“About loving me? Because I would be a liar if I said I didn’t feel the same way.” I spoke softly, one hand tugging his tie and the other touching his jaw. 

“I’m not lying.” He whispered, a glimpse of surprise in his eyes. His gaze softened a little, both of his arms around my head.

“Good.” I whisper, my lips grazing his swollen lips. “Because there’s not going back to before after this.” I whispered, kissing him roughly. My hands on his jaw, feeling the power of it while he kissed me with exploding passion for the rest of night and for the following years. 

[robinlovexo]

heyyy, welcome to my page loves, introduction time!

call me robin💕

to see more of me, follow me to this link >:3

fansly.com/robinlovexo

im 23 😼❣️ i’m a queer individual, im genderfluid, meaning some days i am more masculine, some days im more feminine, most days im very androgynous, and typically prefer they/them pronouns - although all of my pronouns are they/fae/she

✨i love women, and men, nonbinary and trans babes. i am a polyamorous individual, currently not partnered, but have a sexual partner that i see on occasion✨

yes you can call me babygirl, good girl, etc, but also if you’re more creative with gender neutral words you get bonus points. please recognize that this page often is me feminine presenting, but i may switch it up on yall 😋

this is my account, at times i will be a menace and be insufferable, if you’re here you get all of me. take it or leave it. sometimes i horny rage online and write smut, other times i rage abt the fucked up systems online, sometimes it’s my thoughts while i’m stoned. i am also very vocal abt the genocide in palestine, and oppressions worldwide.

i do what i please💗

[‼️ALSOOO!!! SEXY PEOPLE AGAINST GENOCIDE BOYCOTT!!! do not go to starbucks, mcdonald’s, chevron… lots of others too. practice conscious consumerism. our buying choices have power. look up the bds movement to learn more‼️]

i love sweet dms, and if you peak my interest maybe we can chat 🥰

i do not entertain language of r@pe or SA of any kind. if you slide into my dm’s with that, you will be blocked. that is not sexy, in fact that is horrific. i love consent. consent is so sexy. and i will not entertain people who condone any rhetoric of extreme force. gtfo plz.

i am a kinky motherfucker, i’m still exploring kink, i recently learned i have a foot fetish, please worship and kiss my feet, i love to be tied up, and also would love to tie you up too😵‍💫🤤 i love to tease, make me beg… and i would love to make you beg too 😋

i’m a switch💖

✨i sell content ✨

i don’t post anything explicit on my main page.. i just will tease you excessively 🤭 if you want any explicit or specific content from me, i may accept requests, i accept gifts and tips

i obviously don’t have to respond to you, but i usually enjoy it. y’all are cuties.

thank you for being here❣️

[laithraihan]

now i’m kinda curious to hear what you think of proshipping.. if you don’t mind of course

I'll share my thoughts, and if theres anything I say that doesnt make sense feel free to point it out to me because I mostly write with the help of a translator. Under the cut because I wrote too much stuff.

TLDR: proshippers hate me because I dont want to look at glorified depictions of pedophilia/incest/etc, antis hate me because my content isnt 100% sanitized. I stay around anti circles because I find it slightly easier for me to talk about my headcanons with them even though I think they can be insufferable.

So the thing about proshipping. From what I've seen it means being "anti-harassment" and being in support of curating your online experience, which sounds great on paper and that's practically what I do. I have over 3k accounts blocked on my personal twitter to navigate the website more easily and I also dont care if someone blocks me if they dont like my stuff.

Except proshippers never consider me a proshipper because I am uncomfortable with viewing glorified depictions of topics like pedophilia, incest, rape, all that stuff. The same way people are uncomfortable with excessive blood and gore (which I also can't really handle seeing). Whether or not it's always easy to tell if it's glorified is an entirely different topic, which is precisely why I stay away from all depictions in general to avoid being intrusive.

And what's interesting is that I do not label myself an "anti". Mainly because I don't even know what the term "anti" is supposed to mean ("anti-" what exactly. Genuinely please tell me because I actually dont know) But the ones who label themselves "proship" always call me an anti, because again I do not wish to engage with content related to pedophilia etc, and that alone apparently enough to be considered "a person who harasses others over fiction" even if I mind my own business and have no interest in forcing my personal tastes on others, especially if they make it clear that they wont change their mind. Which makes me believe that for a lot of self-identified proshippers, the definition of being "proship" would be more similar to "I love fucked up stuff and if you dont then youre lame and it obviously means you can't tell the difference between fiction and reality" which honestly seems like insecurity to me.

Forgive me for bringing up this up once again but I want to mention an example to make it easier for me to explain: yknow the whole thing with me drawing Minori and Reigen and labelling it "non-cp" which caused a wave of both self-identified antis and proshippers harassing me over that (I'll say that proshippers were more bold about it since the antis harassing me were all anonymous). Proshippers saw me saying "I dont ship that" and interpreted it as me being defensive and in denial, as if I said "guys I swear Im an anti !!! please dont think im a proshipper !!! ", when I meant "I dont want to discuss this with others in a shipping manner because thats not how I see it and I dont want to enter a space Im not comfortable with"

I admit I responded to this situation in a petty manner, but this was after several days of harassment done directly in my inbox and publicly (sometimes I wish yall remembered that group chats and priv accounts exist). My point is that simply saying you don't like seeing pedophilia in fiction is enough for proshippers to believe it's justified for them to harass you over it (and I'm fully aware they'll say it's not harassment, only when antis and "puriteens" do this to them then it's harassment)

Now about the anti side. Don't get me started on them either. If proshippers see me as an enemy then this must mean that I always get along with the ones who call themselves "antis" (I do not). Note that Im only talking about adults here, I dislike beefing with children and I think their feelings about this are entirely reasonable (I'll elaborate on this when talking about internet safety)

But anyways. I think a lot of adults are discourse-brained and do way too much. Im thinking of nonsense like "this ship is problematic because they are 'sibling-coded' so thats basically incest" "siblings giving each other a hug gives me proship vibes" things of that nature. And you're not allowed to do anything that even has the smallest possibility of being interpreted as "problematic", because then they'll harass you for it, and if you clarify your intentions, they expect you to apologize for "misleading" them because clearly they didnt do anything wrong by making assumptions about you.

There's almost no room allowed for creativity with them, everyone has to follow fanon because they consider it canon, if you ever want to try something other than the same boring domestic fluff then it's "too much" (and not even platonic affection is acceptable to draw in certain cases). Which is incredibly fucking boring to me who wants to see different types of content. People even said I was enjoying incest for drawing Reigen selfcest, and that I was "making others uncomfortable" by drawing it. Genuinely seems to me that they only care about moral superiority, that they never think about anything in depth, and I dont think they realize that it also shows in what they create: boring and repeated fanart and headcanons where the only thing you can say about it is "thats cute", nothing more because you saw it ten billion times already. You cant draw two people showing platonic affection that absolutely nobody would bat an eye if it happened in real life, you cant discuss something specific in more depth without people saying you have a fetish for it, and then they'll harass you based on their speculation that it's a fetish. I dont think many realize this, but fandoms are full of autistic people, so it's normal to see people who are interested in very specific things that dont make sense to others! I wish people were less judgmental, but at the same time I dont care if people think Im weird. I think what I mean is theres no reason to mistreat weird people who do no harm to others.

So yeah if you call yourself an "anti" I'll assume youre spend too much time engaging in fandom discourse and you're the type of person to believe that fanart where two people are holding hands is the equivalent to drawing them fucking each other. Which I think is a very childish mindset to have and it's worrying that many adults think this way. I also think that as an adult they should be capable of blocking stuff they hate instead of constantly arguing with people online because at this point it's just mental torture.

The thing about internet safety I mentioned earlier, I'd say this is the one thing that I'll always prioritize discussing whenever proship discourse comes up.... To put it simply: filter and limit the visibility of your content, do not put triggering stuff in the main tags, stay in your own circles. Whether or not you believe fictional rape/pedophilia/etc is bad is irrelevant, my point is that these are objectively triggering topics and should be filtered just like how there are warnings for violence and blood even if it's not real.

"But it's the parents' responsibility to control what kids look at online, this has nothing to do with me!" and I agree with the parents being the ones Primarily responsible. However the reality is that children are online and there's nothing you can do to stop it from happening. Kids will also enter spaces theyre not allowed in, theyre children and children are rebellious especially teenagers, I was like this as a teenager too. You'd be lying if you said you were always obedient since childhood and never did anything you were told Not to do. And you can't really expect teenagers to always block and not interact if they see something triggering. It's your responsibility to block them if they interact with you, because what I see most of the time is adults bickering with teenagers who are uncomfortable, calling them "puriteens", putting them on blast and allowing other adults including NSFW accounts to dunk on them.

Humiliating and degrading teenagers does not "teach them a lesson", it only makes the teenager more stubborn and reactive. Adults must accept that kids will always find their way in there even if your content isnt easily accessible. So I think it's stupid to feel offended at a child because they got upset when they found upsetting content like how any normal child would react. Which is why I wish more adults would keep blocking without saying anything petty to provoke teenagers.

Before someone pancake-waffles me and says "so youre fine with antis doxxing people" no I do not support doxxing. Ive been doxxed so I know it sucks. However the only times Ive seen it go this far is after continuous arguing because nobody knows when to stop. Im not saying this applies all the time nor am I saying doxxing is fine, but there are ways to minimize this sort of outcome as much as possible. Both sides have doxxed people over petty arguments that couldve easily been avoided if they just blocked each other and moved on.

The topic above (internet safety) is probably the only thing related to this where Im actively telling others what they should be doing. It's not only teenagers who are triggered by depictions of pedophilia etc but also adults like myself. In my case Im old enough to block content I dislike without saying a word, however I cant help but think that there's not enough being done about filtering especially when I do not search for this type of content and I still see it all the time.

I also think it's important for me to mention that I have a very poor sense of morality. I do not have a personal moral code that I adhere to, and I mostly stick to the basic universal ones that make sense to me. So I will not discuss the "morals" of consuming this stuff because I am not adequate to share an opinion on this, and I know the most popular topic of discussion related to proship discourse is morality which I frankly find counterproductive. I dont understand why people should care so much if I find something morally correct or not, unless it's to make themselves feel better about having a "superior opinion" to mine. Though I will say that if a man tells me he's into rape "but only in fiction!" then I dont think it will stop me of imagining myself bashing his skull repeatedly with large rocks. Maybe Im too mistrustful of men in general.

Final point I want to clarify is that I am not trying to assert some sort of superiority over people by disliking both sides, like saying "Im not an anti or a proshipper Im a Normal person" or something like that, and Im not expressing a "neutral" stance on the topic of fiction's influence on reality either. There are topics like racism and orientalism in fiction that Im vocal about (which is expected since Im Algerian). I genuinely believe there are many things that are interesting to discuss and should be prioritized, but too many people are chronically online, subjective and defensive, at this point I dont even think it's accurate to say that disliking one side automatically means you support the other side regarding fiction. To me, "proship discourse" is not about the debate of the effects of fiction on reality, censorship in media, etc. It's about everything I described earlier that happens online.

[pearl-blue-musings]

Violet Chemistry

Hi hi!!

I have been working on this for FOUR MONTHS and I can finally share this

Pairing: Kaeya Alberich x fem!reader x Alhaitham

Warnings: 18+, alcohol mention, panic attack, oral male receiving, threesome, penetration, fingering, slight choking, spanking, slight cheating but very little, after care is important yall!

Word count: 11.8K

Alhaitham sighs for the upteenth time as he reads at his desk. Despite the fact that he turned down to be the grand sage, he still gets his pay for being the grand scribe. However, with all the work he has on his plate, things to research, and new things to discover, he finds his mind still wandering off to you. What are you doing? What are you up to? Were you able to move out to a better place?

He doesn’t truly have the right to be concerned with you. It’s been years since he’s seen you, and one of the last times he saw you he had turned down your research project. He always remembered your affinity for the arts, specifically music and dance, and that was something that wasn’t completely allowed in the Akademiya. But somehow you were accepted under the Darshan Vahumana, being affiliated with social sciences. And you knew that. So why the hell did you even suggest it? You’re obviously a genius but why this? Why would you propose such a thing? He hated seeing the pain in your eyes as the sages refused you, concurred by his agreement as the scribe.

For as long as you can remember, the two of you had been in and out of each other's lives. You even knew Kaveh when the three of you were younger. Spending time with his grandmother was always a joy for you. For some reason you’re closer to Kaveh but always have been drawn more to Alhaitham. Kaveh always loved watching you sing and dance, sometimes helping him find inspiration for his architecture. Alhaitham’s allure and genius had you feeling inferior yet always wanting to challenge you. He brought out the best and worst in you but you could never see yourself with him in a romantic way.

Especially after he claimed to never believe in your dreams.

The gray haired male wanted you to understand. He wanted, well wants, you to understand that he cares about you. He knows you’re smart and capable so why keep pursuing something that isn’t beneficial to the Akademiya? He was clearly looking out for your best interests but all you heard was that he didn’t believe in you and thought that the arts were a waste of time. When your research was rejected, you met up with Kaveh at the local tavern where he had to keep you in line as you sobbed into your drinks.

“I don’t,” you wail, “I don’t understand why there isn’t room for art in academic research! It’s just as viable and important!” You sniffle again and take another sip. “I mean, he was so heartless toward me. Me!”

Kaveh sighs and wipes a tear away. “I hate seeing you like this over someone like him. He doesn’t deserve it! And you think you’ve got it bad? I live with him.”

You look up at him with puffy cheeks and reddened eyes, swollen from your crying. “Be like what?”

Kaveh holds your gaze before shaking his head. “So head over heels in love with him.”

His words had hit you hard. You? Love him? Alhaitham? The man that has made your life insufferable yet all the more better all at once? You love him? You quickly chug the rest of your drink and order another. “Not after today I’m not.”

That night was nearly two years ago, and so much has happened in that amount of time. After your research got rejected and you poured your heart out to Kaveh, neither man had seen you. The blond had an inkling you had dropped out or taken a break to travel the world and explore the arts in different cultures. He knew you were leaving after that night. Mostly because when he went to check on you, your neighbors told him you had packed all of your things and left. He pondered telling Alhaitham but he was aware that bastard was the last person you wanted to see. So he kept it to himself.

Even when he went home that night and was questioned by Alhaitham. “Did you manage to take her home? She usually frequents the tavern after good or bad news and I haven’t seen her around. Have you heard from her?” Kaveh’s eyes widened. His roommate and old friend had never shown this much care for someone other than himself. He hears the taps on the floor of the scribe’s impatience. There’s no way he can reveal where you are, even if he doesn’t know.

“I’m not her keeper! And you should’ve been nicer to her. You know music means everything to her and you,” he points accusatively at him, “you know that better than anyone! She gave everything into this proposal, spent weeks mulling over how to combine them together! And you squashed it! How heartless!”

Kaveh huffs and walks away to his room and slams the door. Alhaitham stares after his roommate and shakes his head. “I merely asked if she was okay. She’ll bounce back.” Alhaitham stood uneasily before he entered his study. He sits down and grabs a random book. For some reason his attention faltered and the words he and the sages all but railed you with ran rampant in his mind. Maybe Kaveh was right, his words may have been too harsh. But he can’t take them back. He knows he’s told you worse so he’s sure he’ll see you tomorrow mulling over new ideas.

He didn’t see you the next morning or the morning after that, struggling to swallow the severity of his tone.

….

After all your years of traveling, you never thought you’d end up back in Sumeru. You had heard of the changes that had happened with the Akaedmiya and the Lesser Lord Kusanali, and thought maybe you can visit again. You wonder how Kaveh is doing, having heard nothing of him from the grapevine. Which in itself was shocking, considering he was close to finishing his magnum opus.

But you had heard a lot about Alhaitham.

He was suggested for the new Grand Sage? But turned it down? That smug bastard! And to add insult to injury, they’re still prejudiced toward the arts and desert dwellers? He’s still the same as the rest of them! That wasn’t going to change your mind about checking out the Grand Bazaar and check in on your old friend Nilou. You knew she was always a good dancer and part of the theater there. You figured you would see her, checking everything on you before carrying on with your disguise.

Your first stop was the harbor in Sumeru City, that being your drop off and return point of your stay and previous departure. You take a deep breath as you take in the sights and smells you had abandoned once upon a time. You feel a slight squeeze to your shoulder as you turn around, feeling the tension ebb away as you place your hand over his.

“It’s gonna be okay, snowflake. We don’t have to be here longer than necessary.”

You smile up at your travel partner and boyfriend, Kaeya Alberich as you two step off the boat. “However, I do want to truly explore the alcohol culture here so…” You playfully punch his arm and laugh with him. In your travels around Teyvat, you didn’t count on opening your heart to someone new. You had been content with Alhaitham holding your heart forever, although you despised that fact. However, on your trip through Mondstadt, the knight had come to your rescue. You had been writing in your journal about sound vibrations and musical cultures from the various lands when a band of hilichurls ambushed you. You struggled to get all of your belongings and douse the fire; you assumed the creatures wouldn’t have been active at night but you were mistaken.

Kaeya had swept in just in time and took care of them. You stared at him in awe as he lent his rough hand out to you. When you took it, you were surprised to feel how warm it was despite seeing his icy cold vision in action. And dared you say, felt a spark? His sweet words and quick wit had you handing your stuff to some of his crew as you all headed back into Mondstadt for safety. After returning to the knights headquarters, Kaeya got you settled with Goth at the hotel and that’s where you stayed. You didn’t think you’d ever see him again, but one night talking to several bards at Angel’s Share and you were enraptured by him. He thought your brain was absolutely fascinating, never knowing that music and vibrations can be studied in this way.

Over the next few days he had introduced you to Lisa, whom you’d heard of but never met, and became fast friends. During your stay in Mondstadt, it became almost tradition for Kaeya to pick you up from the library and head to the tavern together. On one of your last nights in Mondstadt before traveling back to Fontaine, Kaeya walked with you around the lake after he picked you up from the library. You were shocked you weren’t at the pub, but he insisted it was coming up. You had giggled at that and the knight stopped in his footsteps. “Your laugh is the most beautiful thing I’ve heard. What can I do to make you laugh like that, dear?”

Your mind was reeling. Specifically, thinking back to all the times a certain scholar called your laugh callous and disruptive. This was a breath of fresh air for you. With the moon dancing on Cider Lake, you weren’t sure what was pulling you into him, may it be the Anemo archon himself but suddenly the world around you ceased to exist and all that was discernible was the captain in front of you. His eye seemed to sparkle more than usual before his lips met yours in a soft kiss. You relaxed into it and wrapped your arms around his shoulders as his hands rested on your hips. When you break for air, your heart was beating out of time erratically, something you had never felt before. And you think the man in front of you feels the same way. He leaned forward to slyly kiss the corner of your mouth and pulled back with a soft chuckle, and proposal.

“Stay in Mondstadt. I know you’ve got your research to do but, what better place to do it than in the city of freedom. And I’ll be here too, if you fancy.”

As you walk through the Grand Bazaar, you reminisce on your relationship with Kaeya. It brings a warm smile to your face as you scan the stalls. The idea of him going to Port Ormos as well, a few hours trip, left you feeling uneasy but brush it off. The Mora in your bag is begging to be spent on some of the fashions and trinkets your eyes come across. You try to avoid buying everything when a growing crowd draws your attention. It seems the patrons of the bazaar are gathering around the front of the theater. With your instrument in your bag, you politely elbow your way to the front to see what the commotion is all about. Once at the front of the circle, you see a rug occupied by a crew of performers. There are some actors, the owner of the theater, and someone you hadn’t seen in years.

With eyes slight and a growing smile, all senses of dread leave your aura. “Nilou!” The redhead perks up from talking with the other performers and quickly pulls you into a tight and warm hug. The two of you giggle as you rock back and forth and you’re certain you feel a warm wetness on your shoulder.

“Oh my dearest,” Nilou begins. “I’ve missed you so much! I thought I would never see you again! You left so abruptly!” By now the two of you are crying from the happy reunion, laughing as you see each other's expressions. She then flicks your elbow and you flinch in response. “Don’t ever leave like that again! You hear me? If you think I’m sad, imagine how Kaveh or even your old friend Alhaitham would feel! Granted, the scribe isn’t the best with feelings…”

“Still?”

Nilou shakes her head with a chuckle. “But no matter! You’re here and you must perform with me today! It’s an open mic of sorts and I’d love to hear or see you. Ah! We should do a dance together!”

You hold her hands securely and blink away some more tears. “So long as I can accompany you,” you breathe out. “I’ve learned so much and there’s a lot I have to tell you!”

Nilou nods excitedly and pulls you into the performing area. Word spreads quickly of the impromptu session and that it may end up extending into the night so anyone can come and go as they please. It’s the first time in a long time you truly felt at home in Sumeru and were so welcomed. You dance your heart out and played until your hands and body were sore. Various vendors provided the theater crew with food and different costumes to wear, something that made this experience all the more exciting. You couldn’t wait to tell Kaeya later at the tavern.

….

It’s rare that his work has him working from home, but today is an exception. With the newly installed sages, the need to be more in touch and connected with the people of Sumeru is more imperative than ever. All he has to do is “blend” with the populace and see what things the Akademiya can improve upon. Without the Akasha, it makes it hard to read the minds of everyone, hence his field trip. Alhaitham has half a mind to ask Kaveh to show him around but knows his roommate will only complain.

The first part of his duty is to explore the shopping and sightseeing around Sumeru City. He knows his way around the city; surely there can’t be anything he or the leaders of Sumeru have missed. The first thing that catches his eyes and ears is the hurried talks and bustling feet of the townspeople. Curious, he eavesdrops a little longer on the couple in front of him.

“Are you heading to the theater's jam session?”

“Jam session? What’s that? Does the Akademiya know about it?”

The first man wraps his arm around his friend and chuckles. “Times are changing around here and it’s about time! I heard it’s an anyone can join or play kind of deal. It was all Nilou’s idea!”

The friend lowers his voice and Alhaitham discreetly moves closer to hear more. “But we know nothing of music and the arts, can we still go?”

“That’s the beauty of it,” the first man comments, “ it’s for anyone! Think of it as a way to relax and express yourself.

“I also heard someone outside Sumeru showed up too so it’s going to be amazing!”

The two men leave and head toward the grand bazaar. Alhaitham pushes himself up from the corner he was hiding from. A jam session? And an outlander? Surely it’s not the traveler, he would have been made aware of their presence. He’ll have to go investigate. Since working with the dancer, the scribe has had more of an appreciation for the performing arts. It’s something he’s always had a slight interest in as it provides to the wholeness of a human being. Mostly, his interest came from you but he didn’t have the guts to actually admit it.

Alhaitham moves on and ventures around the stalls, buying some food and maybe some housewares. He figures it should be his turn to help out around the house while also doing his work. He knows he mostly helps around the library, but he’s glad to have the chance to go outside. Typically on a beautifully warm day, he’d find a tree to laze under and read, possibly daydream about what if’s, but today has him lacking time for himself to indulge himself. He sighs at the lost reading of new material, but knows he’ll have time to catch up on a later date.

Alhaitham shrugs and continues through the stalls. His feet take him to the doors that muffle new sounds and activity. Deep down, he has a feeling it’s you as you have been away for awhile and it would make sense you would return now. WIth all the changes in Sumeru and the Akademiya, he’s sure that was able to draw you out from wherever you were. And a secret part of him hopes you stay so he can correctly communicate why he agreed with the former sages. As he opens the door toward the Grand Bazaar, his mind races with all the changes he would like to implement with the help of others and you. His newer connections have led him to have a better understanding of those less well off than him. For example, meeting Layla who’s had a project rejected under her Darshan Rtawahist had him thinking even more openly. Although he can’t completely relate to her exhaustion levels…

The joy and freedom of the music welcomes him into the bazaar. The bumbling excitement grows the closer he gets to the middle where the crowd is most dense. Using the strength of his shoulders, he pushes his way through the crowd to come see what all the commotion is about. For the first time in what feels like years, he’s unable to formulate the right words at how he’s feeling.

There you are, looking livelier than ever, playing and dancing to the music. Generally having a good time. Alhaitham had missed your smile so much and there it is, on display for everyone around. He tries to blend into the crowd to avoid catching your gaze but what can he say to you? He’s part of the reason why you left, he’s certain there’s some animosity you’re harboring. The way your eyes glitter as your smile reaches the corner of them has him feeling small and surprisingly unworthy. No amount of studying languages, poetry, and even some romance at the urge of his roommate, could aid him in figuring out what to say.

The music fades and Alhaitham scurries toward the back to steer clear. However, he keeps a ear tuned into whatever conversation you might be having.

“That was amazing,” Nilou comments. “I’ve never heard music or a rhythm like that before. Where did you learn it?”

Your eyes beam at the question and suddenly the crowd around also seems to have the same level of interest. So you get comfortable and pull out your bag. “Well firstly, I traveled to Liyue Harbor as it was the closest place. I had always wondered if the land of contracts had anything with sound waves or music considering the Geo Archon’s power and was surpsiwd to see so little! But on my way back here after the Lantern Rite I heard such lovely music! Anyways, after Liyue I traveled to Fontaine where they live for music there and there are so many instruments! And..” The way you speak of your travels has captivated the audience as well as the scribe. Your great detail about every country in teyvat and all the traditions and cultures you learned makes his heart happy as he smiles in content. Alhaitham has seen enough, and despite wanting to reach out and touch you he resists his urges and walks away.

Before running into the Vahumana sage

The sage then calls out for you and the crowd disperses. There’s anxiety written all over your face as the head of your Darshan emerges from the crowd. The papers and books you’ve written are scattered around you and you gulp the closer he gets. The sage picks up your work and smiles fondly. “I’m so glad you came back. We have missed you dearly here!” The whole crowd visibly relaxes as he motions you over for some privacy. “I had heard that there was a gathering of sorts and wanted to come see it out. We’ve had a couple researchers wanting to study social concepts in theater and the arts and I felt this was appropriate.”

Hidden around the corner is Alhaitham, ready to spring into action and defend you and Nilou if it became necessary. You have been sensing someone's presence for a while, but it wasn’t enough to make you seek it out. Right now, you’re too focused on what your sage is saying and potential implications. “So,” you finally interject, “what are you saying?”

The older man smiles and hands you back your work. “I’m saying that with the recent changes in the Akademiya and your extensive research into this topic, we would like to fully fund your previous and future research. I’ll have to make an appointment but if you are willing, I would love to learn more about what you’ve discovered and how it can help the Akademiya.

“What do you say?”

*****

The sun is setting by the time Kaeya returns to the main city. The two of you have booked a hotel room and you’re eagerly awaiting his return. You hear the door open and you quickly get up to greet him with a hug. You can immediately tell something is off when he doesn’t call you his snowflake. “Hey,” you softly coo, “what happened?”

Kaeya sits on the bed with exhaustion and sighs deeply. “Oh nothing too terrible, sweetheart. I found what I was looking for and secured some deals for Mondstadt’s alcohol industry.” Your ears perk up at the off-putting sentence.

“I thought,” you start, “the alcohol and mixed drinks was the reason you came? Something you were doing for the Knights?”

You feel the way Kaeya shifts and shudders. A slow hand reaches out to his shoulder as you rub at them to relax him. “Kaeya? Why else were you here?” You sit down next to him and rest your head against his. The eagerness you have to tell him the good news overruns your need to comfort your boyfriend. The knight in question quirks his eyebrow and adjusts his head to be in your view.

With a smile, he softly says, “you seem to be excited. How was going in town?”

Without warning you push off of him and blurt excitedly. “They’re letting me do my research!”

Kaeya’s jaw drops in amazement as a knowing grin comes to his face. “Snowflake,” he kisses your nose, “that’s amazing.”

You nod happily and sit cross legged on the bed. “And they’re gonna fund my research, past and future! Plus they told me I can stay here and give lectures to help bridge together-“

“Whoa whoa,” Kaeya chides and moves away from you. “You’re planning on saying here?” You’re taken aback by his slightly harsh tone as you stand up from the bed. You face away from him, unable to stand any expression the cryo user might be emitting.

“I mean, that was the plan. You know that KK. This is what I’ve wanted from the beginning. A, a chance.” You turn around with dignity to face him and you’re met with a stone cold look. If looks could kill. “K-Kaeya?”

“So you’re going to leave me, too?” The break in his voice has you scrambling closer to him. You try to console him but he chuckles and smiles at you. “If you must know what I was doing, I was following a lead about my heritage and I met with the traveler.” He pauses to read your face before he keeps going. “I found out more than I wanted about Khanrieah, something I thought all,” he emphasizes, “Sumeru scholars would know.”

You drop your hands from his frame and place them on your hips. “What the hell do you mean by that? Is that why you helped me?”

Kaeya shrugs and you begin to get more angry. “Might as well come clean,” he sighs. “I did help you because I recognized you’re a scholar. I have ties to Khanreiah and the Abyss, and I thought you could help me. You didn’t immediately but you did help me by coming here so…” he leans forward to whisper in your ear, “thanks for that.”

Your eyes fill with disgust and dismay as you push him away from you. This was supposed to be a great thing, you get to continue studying while still being with him. Long distance would be tough but the two of you would make it work. Your musings are silent but Kaeya is more than aware of your thinking face. It’s cute, but right now he knows what he said hurts. He wasn’t planning on saying that but, he can’t let others hurt him. So he has to hurt them first. In his mind his father dropped him off in Mondstadt for a better life; still abandoned is all he can remember. And now, you want to do the same to him. It all worked out regardless, he got to go to Sumeru again to discover his roots and had an amazing relationship.

Your sniffles bring him out of his own head and his mouth opens slightly. The corner of your eyes are tight and filling with tears and your heart feels like it’s on fire. “You lied to me? For your own gain?” A hiccup erupts from your throat as all of your thoughts rush at once. “Did you even love me? Did you really not support me? Archons, you're just like him!” Your voice breaks at the mention of your previous love, and that causes an eye roll from your lover.

“Don’t even bring him up again. I’m not like him.” You can hear and sense the fuel to his response, the fire in his tone as he raises his voice slightly. You quickly scoff and wipe away some tears.

“Bullshit! You both lied to me, you both don’t love me!”

“That’s not true,” Kaeya argues. “I do love you.”

“Then why did you lie? I thought we promised to be open and honest with each other.”

Firm hands gently grab your shoulders. “It’s true you were my ticket to Sumeru, but I do love you snowflake.”

You pout your lips, your fiery emotions still on high. You breathe heavily through your nostrils as your pride can’t let you let him win. “Diluc was right, I shouldn’t trust you.” You knew that would do it. You knew that sealed your victory. The look of betrayal that came across his features was unexpected. His hands left you as if you were something to be left alone. Kaeya’s breathing falters as he struggles to come up with a response.

“At least I’m not hung up on some guy who will never love you back.” All the air escapes your lungs at his proclamation. You have no rebuttal, nothing to defend yourself as your words fail. Kaeya pushes past you as he grabs his keys. “I’m going for a walk. I think we both need to clear our heads. And you need to figure out who you really love.”

You do nothing to stop him as he leaves the hotel room. You do nothing as the weight of what was said finally hits you. The both of you were going for low blows and he hit the lowest. You remembered him talking about his weird family issues, but you never knew that they had ties to the fallen kingdom. You’ve heard about it but know very little of the ancient land. It hurt that Kaeya originally saved you from your Sumeren outfit, but the two of you did genuinely fall in love. That has to be true, right?

Your mind reels with what if’s and you take a number from Kaeya’s book and decide to get some air.

At the tavern.

****

Most evenings he wouldn’t even consider entertaining his roommates plans. But tonight has Alhaitham reconsidering. There was a party of sorts at the tavern, where the drinks are flowing, the music is vibrating, and everyone is having a good time. He’s enjoying having semi intelligent conversations as he can tell Kaveh is getting to his drunken state. Alhaitham is lost in the environment and starts to enjoy himself when the sound of the door opening catches his attention.

In strolls you, anger and frustration across your face as you march up to the bar.

His keen eyes follow your presence and he’s captivated once again. He never thought he would see you again and twice in one day it happened. The glass in your hand dances on your lips as you swallow the liquid in your cup quickly. You take a deep breath, your shoulders relaxing as you blend in with the crowd. Alhaitham bides his time as he sees you talk with old friends, waiting for the right moment to speak to you. For a little bit Nilou comes in to chat with you, but quickly leaves stating she has early practice in the morning. You hug her tightly before she leaves, his mind mulling over what it would be like to have you in his arms like that.

Alhaitham shakes the thought as Kaveh stumbles upon you. Two toned eyes squint toward your direction as Kaveh sits close to you. You welcome him and even hug him. How lucky, he quickly thinks.

“Oh it’s been so long,” Kaveh excitedly slurs. He rests his head in his hand and places a comforting hand on your thigh. “How long have you been back in Sumeru? Y’know I’ve really missed you.”

You giggle and rest your hand on his, taking a quick swig of your new drink. You smile and mirror his actions. “I’ve missed you too, a lot Kaveh.” You sigh in contentment but your smile starts to fade. The blond beside you perks up and removes his hand. With his voice low, he lifts your chin to meet his dilated pupils. “What’s going on in that pretty head of yours?”

You try to avoid his gaze, but his eyes take hold of you and you crumble under their intensity. “It’s my boyfriend. We had—“

“Wait!” Kaveh interrupts. “Boyfriend?! Did you finally, you know, move on from..?” You shake your head sadly before confirming his excited state. “Yes. He’s a knight. I met him in Mondstadt. He’s just amazing and I really do love him…

“But I got an offer to stay here and he didn’t like that.” You pause to take a drink and lower the empty glass. “We had a bad fight about it and he stormed out.”

Kaveh sighs and finishes your sentence. “And because of that you ended up here.” You nod meekly with a pout and the feeling of wanting to cry. Tears prick at the corner of your eyes and you harshly wipe them away. “Do you two fight often?” You barely hear the question as the music and loud conversations provide a background to your now very open conversation. You had always felt like you can tell the blond in front of you anything and tonight is no exception. You do feel the stare of someone nearby but can’t quite place it.

You shake your head. “Not really. We’ll have little disagreements about things but we always work them out. I’ve seen him lie to get his way but never with me…I mean,” you sniffle and rest your head on his shoulder. “He saved me cause he thought I would know more about Khanrei’ah cause I’m from Sumeru! What’s a Vahumana scholar gonna know about that?” Kaveh agrees with you before ordering another round of drinks to the table and lets you proceed. “I mean, it’s not like he would know that…but then I took a low blow cause he talked about my feelings for Alhaitham—“

Kaveh puts a finger to your mouth to prevent you from speaking any further. The bartender comes back with your drinks and you both thank him. The blond takes a sip and then a deep breath.

“Please, and I swear to god, please tell me you’re over that asshole!”

A shiver runs up your spine and you try to hide yourself behind your glass. The feeling of being small increases as Kaveh’s glare hardens. “You traveled the world, fell in love, did research, and had to work for said Mora to do the research, and you still have him in your heart?!”

“It’s not like I want to have these feelings! He just…” Your voice trails off as you turn around, finally getting annoyed with the feeling someone was watching you. And suddenly the butterflies you thought had flown from your stomach have returned. The moment your eyes meet his always calculated two toned ones it’s like the world around you disappears. So that’s the person who’s been watching you. Why do you feel relieved? Your heart beat increases, your breathing getting shallow as you see Alhaitham stand up and stride toward your booth. You’re not sure what’s come over you, but the way he’s walking with more confidence than you’ve ever seen is doing things to you. It’s making you relive all your fantasies and old memories of falling in love with the man coming your way. Heat rushes to your cheeks as you grab your emptying glass to cool off.

“I never thought I would see you here. And of course, you’re drinking with this idiot.”

His deep voice rumbles in his chest and you’re struck by the baritone in it. You peer into his eyes and you catch the hint of a crimson flush on his uncovered ears. Huh, where are his headphones? You’re brought out of your haze when Kaveh interrupts.

“Idiot?! You are so- you know what, I’m in too much of a good mood to argue.” He pushes up and walks away. “You two catch up, I'm gonna continue to walk away!” As the blond leaves, the two of you are left alone while the music and idle chatter fills the void. You’re unsure of what to say to him as the silence between you two increases. He had always known of your love of music but thought studying it wasn’t worth your time. And since he never truly explained what he meant by that, that was the message received and you decided to gloat about your news. With your hands on your hips and a growing smirk you blurt out, “guess who got her research project approved? Still think studying music is a waste of time now?”

On the inside he cringes over hearing the words he said to you that day. But on the outside his emotions barely change. The Vahumana sage approved your research? Interesting. “Well, I guess congratulations are in order.” Alhaitham crossed his arms to match your energy, something he won’t readily admit that he’s missed. He also doesn’t miss the way your words come out slurred or how the alcohol has given you extra confidence. Or maybe it’s the time apart.

For a brief moment it’s like the world around you has stopped. It’s as if you’re thrown back to your childish love of the man in front of you, his grandmother scolding him for saying something insensitive to you. There’s that twinkle in his eye that you thought was long gone but as he’s looking at you in this moment… You’re not sure what to think. Your heartbeat is too loud, the music is too loud, and he looks too handsome to be here by himself. But Kaveh hasn’t mentioned a partner for himself or the scribe. This tunnel vision needs to end, you’re not gonna get sucked in again. “So,” you slowly start, “is there anyone special in your life?”

Alhaitham is caught off guard by your question. He wants to take his time to respond, needing time to cover up that he’s never thought of anyone the way he thinks of you. He’s always considered you in high regard and respects you a great deal. But as the two of you have woven through each other's lives and aged, he’s been finding it difficult to see a future without you in it. The way the blood rushes up to his ears is something he is grateful for, since he always has on his earpieces. But now they’re off and he’s afraid his heart is now on display for you to bear witness. The proximity between you two lessens as the question echoes in his mind.

He sighs with a step toward you. “Being the grand scribe, saving Sumeru from itself, and being the announcer for the InterDarshan competition has had me fairly occupied. I don’t have time for such things.” You feel your heart sink at his words. It’s like the icy sting of his words sharp like Kaeya’s vision make the pain more intense. Were you rejected twice in one day? Your chest starts to heave as tears threaten to boil over. Your bottom lip starts to tremble on its own as you back away from him. The back of your knees hit the booth and you sit in it and with it the erasure of the tunnel vision. You’re brought back to reality. The two men that you have treasures greatly have both told you no, whether they are aware of it or not.

Alhaitham changes his posture and relaxes at your state. His eyes softening as you sit down with your thinking face on. “Breathe,” he gently commands, “what’s going through your mind?” You may be upset with him but this is Alhaitham. This man knows you as well as Kaveh does and as you know yourself. He knows when you’re about to panic and remembered what would help you in the past. That struck a chord with you. His voice is calm and soothing like Kaeya’s when he’s taking care of you, yet is all it’s own and equally helpful. You take some deep breaths, your foggy mind confusing which man is in front of you right now. Your hand grabs onto his shoulder to stabilize yourself as you come down and have your breathing calmed. Alhaitham slides next to you and, based on Kaveh’s help with emotional intelligence, asks you a question. “What happened? I saw you earlier and you weren’t like this.”

Your eyes dart up toward him before you sit back in the comfy booth. “It’s me and Kaeya. We had a fight and—“

“Who’s Kaeya?”

The tone in his voice shifts from calming to questioning in an instant. The hints of malice and something unknown to you emanate from the man next to you and you shiver. Did it get colder in here? And why is he looking at you like that? “He’s my boyfriend. I wouldn’t say a fight, just a disagreement.” You pause to study Alhaitham’s features as you notice his shoulders are a little more tense than a couple minutes ago. All of your knowledge about reading people and understanding body language is flying out the window as you study the man before you longed than normal. His expression is one you haven’t seen or can easily fathom. “I uh, met him when I was in Mondstadt. Or rather, he saved me from a pack of hillichurls. Then he introduced me to Lisa and it was a whirlwind and, gosh I love him and…” Your sighing voice trails off as catch the scribe’s gaze. Once again, you’re struck with an unfamiliar expression and you breathe hesitantly before you keep going. “I thought he’d be happy for me, but I think he’s worried about me leaving him. B-but we couldn’t even talk about it properly cause we were both angry and he mentioned my feelings for you and it was awful and we said such mean things to each other—“

You’re taken out of your ramblings with a firm hand on your shoulder. You’re now forced to face Alhaitham with a million and one thoughts running through your head. He licks his lips in anticipation of what he’s about to ask you, aware that you aren’t of your own words.

“You have feelings for me?”

You blink once, twice, thrice before your breathing resumes. Did you just admit what you’ve kept secret for so long? How? You’ve been so careful. You fumble over your words as the room seems to get stuffier. However, the man whose long held your affections seems to be getting closer. Suddenly, you take a deep breath before slapping your cheeks adamantly. “Fuck,” you grunt out, “alhaitham, I love you. A-and I’ve been in love with you for as long as I can remember!” Your chest heaves from finally releasing the weight of your emotions. For years you’ve wanted to admit your feelings and now you finally have. You gesture your hands openly to him before setting them on the table. “Well, there it is. Happy now?”

You push yourself up and out of the booth to grab a drink to cam your nerves. Your mind is reeling over the fact that you finally said it. You told him, and now he knows. You realize you left before he could properly respond. Maybe it’s better this way, you think. You don’t think he would reciprocate so at least he knows! At least he knows.

A tap on your back turns you around, your drink hanging loosely in your hand. Before you can comprehend who it is, a pair of hands cup your face and pull you in for a kiss. Your eyes go wide before shutting them, holding the glass tightly as you lose yourself to the kiss. Your body goes lax and you put the glass down on the bar as you wrap your arms around Alhaitham. You knew it was him, you had dreamt of being pressed against it and now it’s finally happening. You’re kissing Alhaitham, and he started it!

Shit, you’re kissing Alhaitham!

You open your eyes quickly and push him away. Your eyes are sparkling under what feels like violet lighting where everything is illuminated. And he looks ethereal. He shouldn’t look like this. You shouldn’t look like this. “What the hell, Haitham?!”

The man in front of you looks down at you from his height, a small smirk on his face as he crosses his arms. He starts with an eye roll, “I thought it was fairly obvious what the hell i'm doing.” Your dilated pupils search for an answer as you wait for his response. The condensation is making it harder to hold onto the glass and the reality of the situation. He lowers his head and you can feel his warm breath against your lips. “You told me you love me.

“I’m letting you know that I reciprocate your feelings. I have for a while.”

Your jaw drops along with the drink in your hand. The clattering glass brings you out of your slight daze as you yelp. You try to bend down to pick up the shattered glass before Alhaitham stops you. “Don’t be stupid,” he chides, “you’ll hurt yourself.” He gently holds your hand where a small cut starts to form on your palm. A light trail of blood leaves your hand and you hiss at the pain. Without breaking eye contact with you, Alhaitham takes your hand in his, brings it to his lips, and jots out his tongue to help ease the pain. You feel the butterflies fluttering in your stomach as you bite your lip, your breathing getting shallower. You want to speak but your throat is drying at every second. After what feels like forever, the two of you stand up as a waiter comes to clean up the mess.

Alhaitham tries to interlock your fingers together but you pull away and head to the door. Your feet are moving faster than your mind can think. You want to go back to your hotel, you want to find Kaeya. You want to kiss Alhaitham again. God, do you wanna kiss him again. But you also wanna cuddle up with Kaeya. This is a conflict you never thought you would be in in your wildest imaginations.

The scribe finds you outside the tavern and quickly approaches you. Your hunched shoulders and quick pacing alerts him to your distress. That’s right, he remembers your boyfriend.

He clears his throat and you gently acknowledge him. “Where is this Kaeya? He let you go alone tonight?” You roll your eyes and breathe deeply through your nose.

“Just shut up and kiss me before I start thinking.”

Alhaitham is never one to truly shy away from orders, so he places his hands on your hips and pulls you for another kiss. This one is slower and more thought out than the first surprise one. You find it easy to melt into his embrace, wanting the moment to last a lifetime as his arms wrap around you tighter. His hands hold you firmly against him until that wandering thought about your boyfriend stops him. He can’t help but feel like the two of you are being watched and it’s an eerie sensation. He’s the one to pull away and you’re left baffled. Slightly breathless you ask, “Why did you stop?” Your eyes scan his for an answer as your nerves prepare you for yet another rejection. Your stomach clenches and tears threaten to fall as your eyes start to sting with the possibility of what could have been and what almost happened. Again. You feel the weight of Alhaitham’s forehead against yours as he gently kisses your nose.

“You know,” he softly breathes out with his eyes shut, “I have no problem continuing this.”

“But I do.”

Whatever words you had planned to say to the scribe in front of you are caught in your throat at the new voice. A voice you know all too well and has whispered sweet nothings into your ear for many nights. You push Alhaitham to the side as the cold and hurt face of your lover appears before you. You had never thought about cheating on Kaeya ever in your life, and yet here you are. You let another man kiss you, twice! The man that has held your heart for years finally reciprocates your feelings and you completely forget how the knight has healed you? You hug your arms and feel your airways tighten. Is this another panic attack? Right now? Your vision starts to blur as tears fall freely from the corner of your eyes. Kaeya is the first to react and gently cups your face. “Breathe snowflake. I’m here. You’re safe, you’re safe.” He rubs calming circles with his thumb on your cheek, a gesture he’s come to know is calming for you. Kaeya slowly bridges the gap between you and pulls you in for a gentle hug. “Hey,” he says toward Alhaitham, but his request dies on his lips when he sees the man in question trotting over with a glass of water.

“Drink up,” Alhaitham softly states as he hands you the glass. You nod sharply and take a few sips of the water, all the while Kaeya rubs your back. Kaeya doesn’t miss that this man, he assumes is Alhaitham, also knew how to calm you down like this. The knight scoffs and lets his guard down with a sincere chuckle. “So you must be Alhaitham.”

“And you must be her boyfriend Kaeya,” the scribe responds.

With a large gulp, your eyes dart between the two of them. “And this is the most awkward situation ever.” Kaeya hides a snicker as he notices you’re still a little drunk; partly why he was outside the tavern in the first place. The knight removes his hands from your body and notices the way Alhaitham very gently traces the outline of your face with the back of his finger, matching his breathing with yours. He loves you. Somehow knowing that this scholar also loves you in the way he does calms him and he can lower his guard even more. He blinks twice before addressing Alhaitham again. “So you love her, too?”

The man in question continues his actions without meeting the azure gaze. “So it seems, although it took me far longer to realize it.” Alhaitham pulls away from you, lending out a hand as Kaeya does the same. They help you to stand steady on your feet, still a little wobbly from the sudden panic attack and drinks from earlier. It dawns on you. It’s weird, they both have an arm around your waist and it feels…

Natural.

A warm smile comes to your face before you rest it against Kaeya’s shoulder. Slender fingers tighten on your skin as you peek an eye to your old friend. You try to suppress the giggle that wants to come out but fail. “What’s so funny? You can’t possibly still be drunk.” You lazily shake your head as the three of you start walking. You assume you’re headed to your hotel room but Alhaitham brings you a different way. With the pout he thinks you didn’t catch, he nods upward. “My place is closer. I’m sure my roommate wouldn’t mind the company.” You and Kaeya exchange glances before agreeing with the feeble scholar. As you get closer to your unknown destination, you feel Kaeya’s hand wander farther down your back to finally cup your ass. He gives it a squeeze, making you lose your balance as his fingers try to curl toward your now aching cunt. A whimper escapes your lips and it’s the sweetest and sexiest thing Alhaitham has ever heard.

Kaeya snickers at the blush coming to the other man’s ears as he fishes out his keys. “She likes it when I touch her from behind. It catches her off guard.”

With Alhaitham’s back to you, he unlocks the door and misses how Kaeya has you pressed against his chest and kissing your neck. He’s able to hear your change in breathing and quickly opens the door. “By all means,” he semi strains out, “fuck her for everyone to see.”

You hear Kaeya chuckle before pushing you inside, never letting you go. He suddenly has this need to be surrounded and absorbed by you. Just holding and kissing you isn’t enough. He needs more. He craves it. He wants you to melt on his tongue. And part of him wants to show this Alhaitham just how to treat you. This whole time, the knight has been fathoming just how to make this all work. And he thinks he has an idea. With the door barely locked, Alhaitham leads the two of you to his room for some privacy. Kaeya lays you on the bed and motions for Alhaitham to do the same. His voice is calculating yet playful when he finally speaks. “I have a proposal of sorts,” he starts. Alhaitham crosses his arms after he’s taken his shoes off. With a quirked up eyebrow he nods for Kaeya to continue. “We both love her. And I can tell that we are men above fighting over her affections, considering we are both very special to her. I’m sure she told you the nature of our argument earlier?”

“K-Kaeya, I’m s-sorry for what I said-“ you try to interrupt.

A cool hand cups your cheek as Kaeya kisses your nose. “I know you are, snowflake. But since I still have duties in Mondstadt and you’re here…”

Alhaitham uncrosses his arms with a hmph. “Are you suggesting we share her? As in a polygamous relationship?” Kaeya merely nods and catches your gaze. You’re completely aghast. It’s true you love the both of them and couldn’t be without the other, but will the two of them get along? Is this something Alhaitham would even agree to? He’s not one to share so you’re sure he’s gonna say—

“I would like that.”

“What?!”

“Are you saying you don’t love the two of us?”

You struggle to respond to Alhaitham’s quip but find yourself stuttering over your words. You never thought he would agree. So, he really does love you that much huh? You then go over the pros and cons in your head and you can’t honestly think of anything. Except one thought comes up. “What about the two of you?” You ask, pointing between the two men.

Kaeya has an evil smirk as he approaches Alhaitham and brings him into a surprise kiss. Alhaitham’s yelp of surprise is cut off by the man in front of him grabbing at his chest. It’s quiet, with the exception of the two men kissing beside you. When they break apart, they’re breathless and the lust elevates between the three of you. Kaeya chuckles at the gray haired man’s expression as he licks his lips. “I can see why she’s so smitten with you.”

The scribe tries to recompose himself as he realizes what’s about to transpire. He catches your reaction out of the corner of his eye and doesn’t hesitate to kiss Kaeya again. His hands cup the knight's face as he stands to grind his hips into the other. Kaeya lightly groans into the kiss and starts to lose himself to the man he should be detesting. Alhaitham loosens his grip on Kaeya’s face and trails his hands down the other’s chest and down to his hips, lifting a leg to feel just how hard Kaeya is. The kiss is sloppy and messy, the opposite of Alhaitham in every way and it is turning you on so much. Seeing their kiss has you rubbing your thighs together as you try to inch closer to the two loves of your life. You bite your lip to hold back your whine at being ignored. Why do they get to have all the fun?

Alhaitham is the first to pull away and turn to you. His pupils are blown out not just from the kiss but the way your eyes glaze over with lust as his chest heaves up and down. “Don’t tell me you’re feeling left out.” His eyes wander to your thighs and he smirks. “I thought this is what you wanted? The two of us to get along?” Kaeya then rolls his hips into Alhaitham’s, causing him to give a low moan as the knight unwraps himself from the latter.

“Oh? Is our snowflake greedy?” You find yourself nodding dumbly as Kaeya traces the back of his finger across your face. The lust in his tone has you hissing from his fleeting touch. You move on the bed to sit on your knees, with your face looking up toward the two now very horny men. His hand slowly wraps around your neck with his thumb rubbing at your throat. Your gaze is pleading with him to tighten his grip. He gives a quick squeeze and your eyes roll back, almost losing your balance. His other hand caresses your face then falls down to your chest, lightly playing with your collar bone before rubbing his palm over your pert nipple. You want more, no you need more, so you arch your back into his touch. At your reaction Kaeya pulls away. “Not yet, darling. I have to show Alhaitham how to touch you correctly. So save it for him, okay?”

You can only nod as Alhaitham has already discarded some of his clothes on his own accord. With confidence, Alhaitahm now kisses you directly. The taste of the cocktail you had and his own breath mingle for a smell and taste that has both of you begging for more. His tongue licks at your lips before he sucks at your neck. With your eyes closed in pleasure, you miss Kaeya remove his shirt and place himself behind Alhaitham. You feel Alhaitham shudder slightly as his hands find your waist. “Cup her breasts,” Kaeya whispers in his ear. “Her nipples are sensitive. You might even like to lick them. Like this…” He leans over from behind Alhaitham who leaned over and suckles your breast while cupping and pinching the other. He pulls away with a pop and kiss Alhaitham’s cheek. “Just like that. And don’t worry, she likes it rough.”

That’s all Alhaitham needs to hear before he repeats the actions Kaeya had just done. You gasp in surprise and struggle to stay on your knees. Gray hairs tickle your chest, giving you a sense of comfort. You feel him bite at your nipple and you grab onto his hair for leverage.

Although his mouth is occupied you can still hear him command you. “Keep your eyes on me.” You slowly open your eyes and see his intense gaze boring into yours. He adds the pressure to the breast in his mouth, fondling your other breast harder. It’s weird being under his spell of passion. You never thought he would be trying to make you break in this way. As much as you wanna look away, you can’t. You pull at his hair when he sucks on your nipple as your breath hitches. You breathed heavily through his nose and snickers. With your attention on Alhaitham, you miss the way Kaeya had snuck behind you. His hands are on your hips as he kisses at your neck. You can feel his bare chest against your back, and his warm erect penis against your ass.

You feel him breathe against your ear and your head falls back against him. “Nuh uh, snowflake. I think he said to keep your eyes on him. But let’s get you more comfortable, hm?” With almost practiced form, Kaeya moves back and pulls you so you’re sitting in between his legs as Alhaitham doesn’t break contact with you and moves with you. Your walls clench feeling Kaeya’s erection on your back in anticipation. The man behind you spreads your legs, giving Alhaitham better access to your awaiting body. Lithe fingers all over your body have your head spinning. The scribe releases your breast with a pop and grabs at the back of your head with controlled force.

“I told you,” he growls out, “to keep your eyes on me.” Your hips shake from Kaeya running his fingers around your hips, teetering dangerously close to your lower lips. Alhaitham then slots his lips over yours, darting his tongue into your mouth. The more you kiss him, the more you love the taste of him. You could get drunk off of it. You feel his hands cup your breasts and play with your nipples and you keen into the kiss. The kiss is suddenly interrupted when you whimper out.

“Oh fuck!”

Alhaitham huffs and looks down between your legs. The temperature in the room elevates as he watches Kaeya’s fingers in a haze. The way they open and play with your lips, sliding up and down your pussy. Your breathing shallows as his fingertips keep coming close to your clit but never touches. You wanna buck your hips for more but being in between the two men makes it difficult.

While Kaeya may be playing with you, his eyes are focused on Alhaitham. The way his eyes never leave your pussy has the knight grinning. He spreads your lips wider cause a main to erupt from your throat. With a husky demeanor, Kaeya speaks up. “She gets messy when you’re slow with her.”

“I’m not incompetent in the bedroom,” Alhaitham quickly quips.

“But you don’t know her likes, what turns her on…” Kaeya trails off for a second. “What makes her do this.” He emphasizes by inserting a finger inside your wet pussy, causing you to whine loudly. Your back arches a bit off him and your abs contract. The two toned eyed man in front of you sighs with a gruff before he removes a hand from your chest and copies Kaeya’s movements. He’s also keenly aware of the electricity between him and the knight when their fingers touch. “She feels good doesn’t she?”

Alhaitham tries to ignore the question to enjoy the feeling of your walls clenching around their fingers. Both men have a finger in you, Kaeya closer to your clit with the other below. Their fingers going in and out together has your body needing to shake in pleasure. You’re sure this is a metaphor for something but you’re too blissed out to notice.

“Do you think you could move? You’ve had more time to do this than I have.”

“Heh,” Kaeya chuckles, “are you trying to take charge?”

Their pace inside you increases and your grip on the two men tightens. You’re not sure who, but someone just barely graded your clit and a high pitched moan escapes your lips.

“It would be better. I’ve known her longer.”

Behind you Kaeya rolls his his and starts to rub your aching bud. “Yeah? We’ll have you made her cum so hard she can’t walk? Or made her scream in ecstasy from being fucked over and over.” He inserts two fingers in your slit, making it now three fingers, with his thumb rubbing over your clit.

Alhaitham’s fingers spread your lips again as your juices coat his fingers. “It’s something I’ve wanted to do for awhile,” his breathing got deeper. “And since I’ve already passed the tutorial, I’d like to have my turn.”

You groan in pleasure and frustration before finally speaking up.

“Would you both,” you pant, “shut up and fuck me?”

You hear some possessive chuckling as their fingers increase their speed. You shut your eyes in pleasure, your head falling back into Kaeya’s chest with your own heaving. “I-I’m so close! It feels so, so good!” Your arms weakly reach out for the man in front of you grabbing for him to kiss you. He easily falls into the temptation of your lips and silences any moans. His finger inside curls with the captain’s and you whimper into his lips. You feel your walks clench and that cook inside needing to be releaswd.

Kaeya breathes heavily behind you, his cock throbbing at the thought of being inside you. And from being challenged by the man to your front. He’s so used ri being in charge, but having someone who also is used to it is invigorating for the cryo user. It’s sexy and he likes it a little too much. “Aw, you’re close aren’t you? Come on baby girl, cum for us. Let him see what he’s been missing.” Almost as if on command, your hips shake as your orgasm overwhelms you. Before it hits, Alhaitham speeds his finger and releases your lips to hear the beautiful melody that is your release. You cum hard on their fingers, body rolling to help you through the sensation. Both men slow their fingers as two pairs of lips attach to your neck and collar bone. Kaeya leaves fleeting kisses in your sweaty skin before he bites your earlobe. “I think he wants to fuck you. But shouldn’t you prepare him?”

You bite your lip in anticipation and gently push Alhaitham off of you. You maneuver your body to be on all fours in front of the scribe. You start to crawl toward him and lower your body to rest on your stomach. Your hands make good work of his pants to free his cock from its confines. It stands tall, the tip wet with pre cum as it throbs against his chest. You’ve always imagined what his cock would look like and it’s better than your imagination. You unconsciously lick your lips. Above you, Alhaitham cups your face and stares down at you with love and lust. “Just like before, keep your eyes on me.”

You nod eagerly as you slowly wrap your lips around the head. Your tongue swirls around the head and dips into the cleft of it. Alhaitham grips your hair, forcing you to go down further. He’s bigger than you thought, and that makes it all the better. You hollow your cheeks and work your tongue up and down his shaft. The look of lust and desire in his eyes goes straight to your cunt as you raise your hips and shake them. A harsh slap comes to your ass that makes you wet and moan on Alhaitham’s dick. Behind you, Kaeya gives your ass another smack before you feel the tip of his cock mess with your lower lips. You keen backwards and shut your eyes in pleasure. Suddenly, you feel a light slap to your cheek. Possessive eyes meet your glassy ones. “I told you to keep your eyes on me. I don’t care what he’s doing to you.”

Kaeya chuckles. “I’m getting ready to fuck her. Is that alright, snowflake?”

You pull off of Alhaitham’s wet and leaking cock to nod and pant out. “Yes, I’m good master.”

“Good girl,” Kaeya congratulates. “Now make sure to suck him dry as I fuck you, okay?”

You agree and go back to sucking off Alhaitham. The scribe tosses his head back as your warm mouth takes him again. His breath escapes with a groan as his hand stays firm on your head. “Is this what he’s reduced you to? An eager slut who loves sucking my cock? You always wanted to be between two men,” Alhaitham hisses as you take him to the base. “So fucking dirty.”

“The scholar has a nasty mouth on him. I like it,” Kaeya comments before his erect penis slides inside you, your essence acting as lubricant. “Oh you always feel so good, princess. Take your master’s cock.” He slams his hips into you and you give a muffled yelp. Your grip on the scribes thighs tighten as Kaeya sets a brutally teasing pace. He starts at nice and slow, letting you get adjusted to him and then pistons into you. Saliva falls out the corner of your mouth as he pounds you, making it hard to focus on the dick in your mouth. Kaeya is unrelentless, incredibly turned on by the two people in front of him. He knows he loves you, and maybe in time he’ll love the man you're blowing. Kaeya is sure of it. With how tightly he’s gripping your skin, you’re sure his nails will leave indents. That thought has you moving your hips back into him. All the while, Alhaitham still hasn’t broken eye contact with you.

All he can think of is how good you’re making him feel. He wants this all the time and never wants to let you go. You’ve already cum once and he assumes you’ll cum again, so finally having intercourse with you will have to wait. He doesn’t want to tire you out, and from the night you’ve had he thinks two orgasms is enough. He feels the need to unload himself into you, a feeling he’s used to on some lonely nights but being able to do this with you is something else entirely. Kaeya is groaning and grunting behind you as your walls clench around him. He knows he’s getting close and can judge that his new partner is too. So to make things easier, he leans over to rub at your clit viciously. He feels you shake and you stop to yell in muffled pleasure. You suck on Alhaitham. Hard.

“Fuck, I’m gonna cum if you do that.” Hearing this, you suck him harder as Kaeya’s fingers bring you closer to the edge of ecstasy. Alhaitham’s husky voice is enough to bring you to your knees but hearing it in this capacity has you seeing stars. You feel his hips buck up into your mouth as his hand speeds up. “Shit, I’m gonna cum. You better take it all. I don’t wanna see a drop on these sheets, you understand? Take all my cum.” You hear him grunt through his teeth, his hot cock throbbing in your mouth. Before you know it, his hips rise and his hand presses down as he releases into your mouth. Curses and mumbles of your name flow from his lips as his balms empty down your throat. You pause your ministrations to catch his face in utter ecstasy.

It’s beautiful. You want to remember this face for a long time.

His cum tastes a little salty, kind of like his attitude, and you wouldn’t have it any other way. After seeing Alhaitham succumb to euphoria, Kaeya holds onto you tighter as he quickens his pace. “Such a good girl, making him cum like that. Now take my seed, princess. I know you wanna be full of me. And since,” he thrusts hard, “you’re so obedient, don’t spill a drop.” With your mouth free, you’re able to moan and whimper as loud as you want. Your throat gets no reprieve as Kaeya pounds into you.

“F-fuck Kaeya, you feel so good.” That earned you a spank to your ass.

“That’s not,” he spanks you again. “That’s not what you call me.” He rubs your clit hard as tears come to your eyes.

“I-Im sorry! It felt so, so good! Can I, can I cum?” Your whines and pleads are a symphony to the two men as the knight finally reaches his climax with a loud whimper. He empties himself into you, holding you against him. You hear him mutter about how you’re a good girl and how good you feel. From the rush of intense and overwhelming emotions, and the physical stress you were under, it’s no surprise you passed out.

Alhaitham is concerned when you’re very clearly sleeping and Kaeya is still inside you. He coughs, “shouldn’t you remove yourself? I guess we fucked her so hard she couldn’t handle it.”

Kaeya gently removes himself from you and trails kisses down your cheek to your neck. He signs softly before asking, “where’s your bathroom? I’ll clean her up so she won’t wake up with all this filth.” Alhaitham points him where to go and he has a moment alone with you. Goodness, you’re even more beautiful asleep. He can’t help but leave a small kiss on your lips. Kaeya returns with water and a towel, immediately cleaning you up without waking you. The temperature in the room starts to drop as the lust fades. Alhaitham returns to the bed and sees Kaeya do the same opposite you. “We can talk in the morning,” Alhaitham concludes, “I think rest is most important for us right now.”

*****

The sunlight peaks into the bedroom, causing you to awake from your slumber. You get up and stretch, feeling some soreness across your body. You turn to the left and see Kaeya, a warm smile coming to your face. You turn to the right and notice the sleeping form of Alhaitham. The butterflies return to your stomach as you brush some of his hair out of his eyes. The sunlight makes him look ethereal in the morning and you want to see this all the time. You lightly kiss his nose before snuggling back into bed, realizing that the unthinkable is possible with your research and in your love life, the future looking bright.

[clouisluvr]

part two to dating sean diaz headcannons maybe??

hi beautiful people❤️ i hope you’re all doing well, im sorry about how long this has taken it’s definitely overdue🫠 im gonna try and keep slowly making my way through requests so bare with me! hope you guys enjoy this <3 also please cutely pretend to not see any potential typos LMAOO

incoming summoning of all sean diaz lovers …

- sean is the type of boyfriend to buy you so many squishmallows but be pretend jealous at how many hugs you give them😭 jokingly says you probably love the squishmallows more than you love him but will still always buy you more when you see them together at costco trips

- a slow kiss enthusiast! sean prefers a more sensual and intimate make out sesh rather than a fast and rushed one, definitely has his hand cupped on your cheek, with the other resting on your thigh as his thumb gently rubs the skin there. will stop for a second to make deep eye contact with you and tell him he loves you before leaning back in😵‍💫 (i Fear i need him expeditiously..)

- if u have/want piercings he’d totally get them with you! cute matching septum/nose piercings methinks

- one of yalls fave things to do would be chatting shit ab bad tv LMAOO. like yall are always tuned into love island, too hot to handle etc. you both pretend it’s Insufferable but really you love hatewatching it (unfortunately daniel cannot watch with yall, esteban tells him its too inappropriate😭)

- MARIO KART MATCHES ALWAAYSS!!! after friday sleepovers yall will spend saturday mornings after breakfast playing! sean gives meeee… luigi or link main vibes? i think hes pretty good at it tbh, lowkey competitive but will happily throw the match the second you pout ab losing (unless ur an s tier mario kart player in which case yall will race against each other all day LMAO) oh and Ofc daniel plays with you guys but i think daniel would be absolutely HORRIBLEE at mario kart, everyone just lets him think hes good LMAOO

- in my last sean post i said that he prefers small displays of affection in public but in private he’s a lot more comfortable with touching you. nonstop cuddles, kisses every part of you he can see. loves for you to straddle or lay on top of him, will rest his hands on your hips or small of your back. likes for you to be kinda laid on top of him as yall laze around for a while, he basically uses you as a weighted blanket. sean loves doing nothing with you - sometimes just being quiet in your presence is perfect for him. unfortunately for sean its rare that he gets to be as affectionate as he wants with you because daniels alwaayss hovering around yall, and if not daniel, its esteban making sure his bedroom doors not closed😭

- esteban definitely works extremely hard and slightly struggles to make ends meet but would still wanna spoil sean and daniel -so any family trip he manages to save up for you are absolutely invited! sean would happily be a slightly cringe couple at disneyland with matching mickey ears, (not the kind of couples that cling to each other in the line for rides though LMAO). and every time daniels too short for a ride, sean will always always tease him and you have to give him a lil whack on the shoulder and then comfort daniel. when esteban (eventually) takes sean and daniel to see puerto lobos, he invites you along. you’re considered a part of the diaz family so esteban wants to share where he comes from with you and his sons :’) lots of long beach days with sean and daniel there!!! sean probably gets a lot of art inspiration from seeing you by the beach, probably having a playful water fight with daniel. he thinks you’re in your element when you’re being totally carefree. your joy is radiant for sean and inspires some of his greatest artworks :’)

- i think sean would need some reassurance from his partner. karen being an absentee mother has most likely given sean some abandonment issues so he’ll tend to feel anxious and insecure from time to time. genuine love and patience from his partner will help sean continue to open up and feel more secure in his relationship with you

- arguments with sean would be … a bit terrifying ill be real! the man is scary when he’s mad, i think he’d try his best to keep his emotions under control but frustrations get the better of us sometimes and he may end up saying something hurtful💔 he instantly feels guilty and apologises profusely but also understands saying ‘im sorry’ isnt always enough to take away the hurt caused. if you give him the silent treatment for a bit, i imagine he’d actually turn to daniel for advice! i think daniel would actually give weirdly helpful advice LMAO. he’d probably tell sean to start the conversation off by giving you something you like, like a choc-o-crisp. it sounds stupid at first but sean would probably attempt to bake you something (and fail horrendously) but seeing the effort he puts in to try and make things right is the perfect first step to resolving the argument :’) sean would definitely value communication in a relationship and wouldn’t want you to hold back about any potential problems!!

- you’d become a bit of a motif in seans artwork! he’d unintentionally draw some of your features or favourite interests in the background of his art, it becomes a sort of signature. you’re his muse!

- couples costumes for halloween are a must. for oct 2022 yall would show up to parties (and trick or treating with daniel) as miles morales and spider gwen!!

- i think the diaz family have a family game night every now and then that you obviously attend! they don’t hold back with you though, they will stack uno cards against you like crazy if you’re about to win😭 and daniel most definitely cheats at monopoly and takes extra money from the bank, to which sean always complains🤭

- during yours and seans early days of dating, he’d probably go out of his way to keep you from meeting his dad and daniel. not because hes ashamed of them.. more so he knows how embarrassing they can get and he doesn’t want you to think he’s weird. he’ll explain this to esteban after inevitably being badgered to bring you over for dinner one night, to which his dad will tell him that if you’re really right for sean and genuinely like him, you’ll accept his family too. besiiidees how ‘embarrassing’ can they really get? well .. i think your first time meeting seans family would be a bit disastrous. sean would insist on cooking dinner, i think he’d attempt lasagna but would leave it in the oven too long. as you arrive, daniel is probably in the midst of attempting another zombie costume project whilst sean and esteban freak out over the burnt lasagna now setting the smoke alarm off. once you arrive and knock on the door the muffled chaos from inside goes SILENT followed by the sound of some rushed movements and whispers. sean lets you in with a slightly panicked smile and despite the smell of smoke wafting into your nose, the ear piercing ringing of the smoke alarm harshly hitting your ears and the sight of his little brother drenched in what you hope is fake blood, you smile back at him and lean in to give him a sweet kiss on the cheek and all of seans worries about you coming over are instantly soothed.

- seans the type of boyfriend to be totally down with a pamper session. he’ll happily let you play aesthetician with him, applying multiple face masks, plucking his brows, waxing his legs, shaving his face, doing his makeup etc. sean seems like the type to have relatively clear and healthy skin but he’s left glowing after yalls little spa sessions!

- lyla ADORES you. you guys are probably incredibly close friends (actually i think lyla most likely introduced you and sean) you and sean are aware of lyla’s fear of her and sean not being friends one day, so you both make an effort to not leave her out of things. you guys definitely go to concerts and new movies together and make a bunch of amazing memories.

- sean has a polaroid of you in the back of his phone case❤️ his lockscreens reserved for his dad and daniel!

- absolutely adores you borrowing his tshirts or hoodies… he loves seeing you in his clothes but more so loves how they always smell like you after you wear them. if you’re bigger than sean he’d love borrowing any cute graphic tees or hoodies you had too.

- i think sean would spend christmas eve with your family and you’d spend christmas day with his! sean would paint you the most beautiful portrait of a candid photo of you, alongside a personalised photo necklace (these are so so cool - you can place a customised photo inside of the necklace, and you see it once you look inside the heart pendant!!) it’s probably of a picture that esteban took of the two of you during your holiday in puerto lobos. its one of the most beautiful meaningful gifts he could have gotten you, and you wear the necklace every day.

- i think when sean falls for someone he doesnt fall fast but once he does fall, he falls VERYY deeply in love. you bring him so much happiness and he loves expressing that through big and small gestures. randomly surprising you with flowers during the week, suddenly being overwhelmed with a wave of songs that remind him of you prompting him to make you a mixtape, writing you love letters, absentmindedly finding himself doodling you on a post it note mid class and handing it to you. sean loves you with all his being and shows it to you every day.