#y'all should take it seriously... i posted this immediately instead of adding it to my queue

[bim-mba]

if any of my 5 human and 82 porn-bot followers like 'howls moving castle' (novel) y'all should read this

I am howling

[starsinmylatte]

Nightcall

Pairing: Thrawn x afab reader

Rating: Explicit (Very 18+)

Word count: 2.4k

Warnings: established relationship, edging, praise k!nk, very slight dom/sub undertones, interspecies relationship

Summary: Reader has had a VERY long day, and Thrawn is away from the Chimaera. Or is he?

Author's note: Hi! I'm finally starting to post fics to Tumblr again. I've been away for a bit, but I am very excited to write more. All my stuff is also on AO3 here! Any comments or reblogs are always greatly appreciated (seriously y'all leave the sweetest comments and it makes my day). Have fun reading my first ever attempt at smut and lmk if you'd like to be added to my tags <3

Today had been hell.

Thrawn had departed the Chimaera days ago to handle some business on Coruscant, and, as usual, Konstantine was using his absence as an excuse to be a massive pain in the ass. The Grand Admiral relied on you to help keep order just as much as he relied on Eli Vanto, but he was currently as busy as you were. So, the ever-glamorous job of making sure the Seventh Fleet remained in orbit mainly fell to you.

It was the fifth day Thrawn had been gone, and you were already fantasizing about throwing Konstantine out of the airlock. It would undoubtedly save the remnants of your sanity. He usually wasn’t blatantly insubordinate, but today he seemed to make an exception.

“I simply don’t understand why the Grand Admiral is insisting on holding this formation,” he exclaimed. “We should be chasing the rebels back to their base by now!”

Another headache was definitely coming on. I swear on every star in this kriffing galaxy…..

Your reply was icy and tinged with frustration, “Konstantine, if you wish to question the Grand Admiral’s tactics, you are more than welcome to discuss it with him when he comes back. Until then, we will be following the orders he left us with.”

He momentarily met your piercing stare before realizing any further arguments would be futile.

“Fine. I do believe I’m needed elsewhere,” Konstantine huffed as he departed the bridge.

For the first time in hours, the bridge was blessedly silent. You sank into a chair, rubbing your temples. Kriff, I definitely feel that headache now….

A sudden hand on your shoulder made you jump. You were so distracted that Eli might as well have materialized out of thin air.

“Hard day?” The corners of his mouth twitched as he attempted to stifle his amusement. “I heard you gave Konstantine a well-deserved earful.”

You rolled your eyes at him, “Next time, it’s your turn. This is my fourth headache in the past five days.”

“Why don’t you take the rest of the afternoon off? You’ve been working harder than anyone else on the Chimaera for days.” He lowered his voice before adding, “He should be back soon.”

A wave of relief washed over you at the news. You and Thrawn had gone to great lengths to keep your relationship secret from the crew, but Eli was too good of a friend to be kept in the dark. Besides, he would’ve noticed eventually that his two best friends were slightly more than friends.

Eli must’ve noticed the change in your expression, “Oh, you definitely need a break.”

He shoved a datapad in your hands and started pulling you to your feet, ignoring the numerous protests you gave him. “Here, take this to Thrawn’s office, leave it on his desk, and then you’re taking the rest of the day off. No arguments.”

-----------------------------

Thrawn’s office was its usual freezing temperature. Even though your uniform had layers of thick material, the chill was easily seeping through them. Shivering, you placed the datapad on the large desk in the back of the room.

You turned to leave, but a pang shot through your heart as you looked around the empty room. It was normal for you to barely see Thrawn on the days he was especially busy, but it was always different when you knew he wasn’t on the Chimaera at all. Stars, you missed him when he was gone. Just knowing he was nearby on days you couldn’t see him was so comforting. “Soon” wasn’t a good enough time frame for when he’d return.

A sudden thought crossed your mind; nothing was stopping you from spending the night in Thrawn’s quarters. It wasn’t exactly an unusual occurrence for you to sleep here, and it would be comforting. Besides, with your headache, you didn’t exactly feel like walking all the way back across the ship to your room, and his private quarters were conveniently connected to his office.

You began stripping off your uniform as you walked into the room and made your way over to the bed. It was still freezing, but every layer you removed took the worries of the day with it. Soon, everything except your bra and panties sat neatly folded on the bedside table. In this moment, you weren’t an Imperial officer; you were a woman climbing into her lover’s bed for comfort after a long day.

As soon as you slid between the soft, black sheets, you instantly received the comfort you were craving. They smelled exactly like Thrawn, crisp and clean, but with a unique depth cut by the citrusy scent of his favorite tea. You could almost imagine that he was actually there beside you. A contented smile crossed your lips as you drifted off to sleep.

---------------------------------

You suddenly woke to a light caress on your cheek. In your groggy state, you didn’t fully realize what that touch meant until you leaned into it. You would have probably fallen back asleep were it not for the low, pleased murmur that followed your actions.

“Apologies, ch’eo bat in’a, I did not mean to wake you, but I was not expecting to find you here.”

Your eyes flew open in shock as you sat up and gasped, “Thrawn!”

The low light in the room illuminated the regal form sitting beside you on the edge of the bed. Thrawn’s usually unreadable expression was one of slight amusement mixed with another, softer expression. You couldn’t help but notice his beautiful azure-hued skin and luminous ruby eyes were only complemented by the dimmed light; you couldn’t help but think he was meant to be seen like this. He must’ve been tired from the constant travel, but nothing in his posture or expression gave it away.

You didn’t wait for him to speak again before reaching over to embrace him. Thrawn immediately wrapped his strong arms around your waist and pulled you in tightly. Pressing your face into his chest, you quietly murmured, “I missed you.”

He said nothing, so you assumed he didn’t hear. You both sat contentedly for a few minutes and savored the intimacy before he moved one hand to stroke lazily down your back and the other to run through your hair. As you leaned further into his touch, he grabbed your chin and turned your head so he could press his lips to your ear.

“You are quite endearing when you’re half-asleep. It’s beautiful,” he whispered.

The praise combined with the sensation of his warm breath in your ear finally did you in; a flame began to spark to life in your core. You had missed him, and every single part of you was screaming for you to let him know just how much.

Before you could even move, Thrawn trailed his lips down to kiss your neck, and the flame in your core blossomed. You let out a quiet, breathy moan, and he immediately stopped.

Bringing his lips back to trace the shell of your ear, he rasped, “Oh? It seems you did miss me. How fortunate that I was able to return to you already in my bed.” He paused to lightly trace the outline of your bra before continuing. “And in something so pretty too. A shame that it will soon be discarded.”

You whimpered at his words as his lips renewed their brutal assault on your neck and upper chest. For what seemed like an eternity, Thrawn was content to lavish affection on the spots that provoked the greatest responses from you as his hands held you in place.

“Thrawn, please…. Touch me….” you begged, hoping desperately for him to comply.

He merely let out a dark chuckle as he chided, “Patience, ch’eo ch’itiseb, for every protest that leaves your pretty mouth, I will be sure to make you wait even longer.”

You bit back a moan at his sinful words; his eyes seemed to glow even brighter, and his smile turned feral. The look he gave you in return was simply predatory.

He continued to suck hickies into the sensitive skin at the base of your neck and around your collarbones. His tongue licked a long, torturous line up the column of your neck to kiss the area under your jaw. With every kiss, caress, and touch, the flame in your core spread throughout your entire body. He bit down on the juncture of your neck and shoulder, and you melted even further into his arms.

“It seems you were able to learn an adequate lesson in patience, so now we may continue. Turn around for me,” he ordered.

You turned to face the wall as he returned to his previous position at the edge of the bed. He trailed his hands up your waist and around to cup your breasts. Thrawn may have decided that you could have more of his touch, but he still refused to dip his hand under the lacy fabric of your bra. Instead, he teasingly rubbed over the material to brush against your nipples. Your head fell back to rest on his shoulder as you pushed your chest out into his hands, still desperate for more.

“How very, very eager for my touch….” His tone was still infuriatingly collected for how quickly he’d reduced you into a moaning mess, but a slight accent began to mar his words. “Ch’itses’o euhn ei.”

As soon as the words left his mouth, Thrawn unfastened and discarded your bra. Finally, he wrapped his hands entirely around your breasts. The sharp contrast between the warmth of his body and the room’s icy air only intensified the pleasure as he began to roll your nipples between his fingers.

You couldn’t help but moan his name again, loudly. Thrawn’s breath hitched before he let out a low, breathy moan, “Bun vn’inen’i. Let me hear you.”

His voice had always been profoundly attractive, but hearing him murmur filthy sentiments into your ear in his native tongue made you absolutely melt. You let out another gasp and rubbed your thighs together, seeking any friction you could find, keenly aware of the desire beginning to pool between them. In your desperate search for friction, you accidentally rubbed your ass back against him and felt his growing erection.

The contact made Thrawn hiss. In one fluid motion, he flipped you around, pushed your back flat against the mattress, and leaned over you.

It was moments like this when you remembered you were in the bed of one of the most powerful men in the galaxy. Thrawn’s ruby eyes glowed with lust as he gazed down at you. His feral smile returned as he studied his prize. “Allow me to show you just how much I missed you.”

He trailed kisses from your breasts down to your inner thighs, nipping at them slightly, then stopping to look up at you as he reached your panties. “These must go,” he murmured against your thigh. Thrawn took the band in his teeth and began to tug the panties off, using his hands to remove them fully.

Finally, you laid before him completely bare, and once again, he paused to appreciate your body. “Simply beautiful,” he cooed.

Thrawn returned to kiss your inner thighs before he spread your legs further. He moved to kneel on the floor at the side of the bed and pulled your hips to the edge. You knew exactly what was coming next. “Oh….”

You barely had time to moan before he swiped an experimental finger through your core. Under any other circumstances, you’d be embarrassed that you were already so wet, but Thrawn lit a fire in you that no one else could. Now it was his turn to let out a low groan at his discovery.

He didn’t waste any more time before moving one of his long fingers to lightly trace around your entrance. The torment of his delicate touch made you rock your hips upwards, desperately begging for more contact. Without warning, he pushed two fingers deep inside you, making your walls clench hard around them. You moaned and begged for more as he began to pump them in and out of your drenched core, causing your legs to shudder in pleasure.

“Look at you, I’ve only just started using my fingers, and you’re already shaking,” Thrawn groaned.

He brought you right up to the peak of pleasure before suddenly withdrawing. You sobbed in protest as he brought his fingers up to your mouth. “Clean them off,” he commanded. Hoping that he’d finish you off if you complied, you obediently took his fingers into your mouth and sucked all your juices off of them.

Thrawn was very pleased. He moved back down between your thighs and sucked another hickey on the delicate skin before returning his attention to your core. He slowly circled your sensitive clit with a finger before licking his way up to suck on it. Once again, he continued his attention until you were at the very edge before withdrawing. Being edged once was hard, but the second time left you an absolute mess.

When Thrawn looked down on you, covered in his marks, eyes glazed over in lust and absolutely begging for completion, he lost the remnants of his control. He leaned back up to murmur, “Ch’eo ch’itiseb, how would you like me?”

“Stars, Thrawn, I don’t care. I just want you inside me now,” you moaned back at him as you reached up to help tug off his remaining clothing. After a few moments, he was also completely bare and leaning over you on the bed again.

With how desperate you felt, any time at all was too long, but your pleas and cries finally turned into more gasps and moans of pleasure as he finally lined his thick cock up with your entrance. The feeling of being so gloriously stretched and filled as he pushed in made your walls clench around him. Thrawn moaned at the sensation and began fucking you at a leisurely pace.

He leaned in to capture your lips in a burning, passionate kiss as his thrusts grew faster and your hips rose to meet them. His hands roamed your body, finding their way to pinch and tug at your nipples. You moaned into his mouth as you grew closer and closer to the high you’d been chasing all night.

Pausing between kisses, Thrawn suddenly grabbed your chin and stared into your eyes with his burning red ones before returning to kiss you hungrily. The unspoken message was clear: you were his. This new intensity, combined with his thrusts that came faster and faster, finally sent you over the edge into a shattering climax. Thrawn’s thrusts grew more and more erratic until he finished soon after you, coating your walls with his seed as he came.

As you both lay there in the afterglow, Thrawn mused, “I may have to find an excuse to be gone more often.”

Tags: @pretty-with-andorian-shingles @mittheresabosen @handbaskethell

[nazario-sayeed]

Interruption (Ethan X F!MC)

Author's note: It's been forever since I've posted an Ethan fic so I was searching for prompts to help me out of my writer's block and came across the following prompt: "I was wondering how long you two were going to make out like that before you realize you weren’t alone" and this is the result. I miss Open Heart, y'all. English is not my first language. Also, I can't pick a decent title even if my life depends on it. 

PS: This has been sitting on my drafts for weeks and after that blog post that made me lose my mind, it seemed like a good timing. 

Warnings/rating: M (some implied sexual content, kissing, swearing; it's mostly a dumb pointless fic. Seriously, it's the dumbest thing I've ever written, that's the biggest warning, I don't even know why I am posting it) 

Word count: around 1800

Masterlist

Tag list (general): @kayden-vescovi​ @lahelalove​ @donutsgirl36​ @queenkaneko​ @msjpuddleduck​ @zadieschoi​ @brightpinkpeppercorn​ @jlpplays1​ @desiree-0816​ @embarrassingsmartphonegame​ @mfackenthal​​ 

Tag list (Ethan): @chasingrobbie​​ @a-i-n-a-a-s-h​​ @akacalliope​​ @perriewinklenerdie​​ @lastfirstcupcake​​ @sparklinglilac​​ @sofreakingdonewiththeworld​​ @furiouscloddonutpeanut​​ @paulfwesley​​ @vankittenheart​​ @heauxplesslydevoted​​ @theroseduelist​​

let me know if you want to be added/removed from my tag list please

Ethan and Lexie tried to keep away from each other. They really did. For about two months, they actually managed to not run back to each other and both of them felt miserable because of it. If they weren't so committed to their jobs, it would have taken a week rather than a couple of months until they found their way into each other's arms again. They kept ending up intertwined in his office, a supply closet or even an on-call room and saying it'd be the last time. In one month, they had at least 5 encounters that were said to be "the last time". After a while they stopped lying to themselves and simply fully gave in to their feelings. 

He was still her boss, though, so they had to be careful with their relationship. Keeping it a secret was not ideal and not what they wanted, because honestly neither of them were ashamed or thought they had something that had to be hidden, but their coworkers might not think the same- especially now that Ethan was working as her direct supervisor. Lexie's roommates kind of knew about them, but they pretended they didn't; they didn't really say anything after that awkward moment when they ran into Ethan sneaking out of their apartament the morning after the hearing and Lexie wouldn't be the one to bring it up. All of them- Ethan, Lexie, her roommates- pretended nothing had happened. 

But then the two of them got together again and it felt painfully hard to pretend nothing was going on.  

Ethan used to despise those doctors who couldn't keep their personal life away from work; even when he dated Harper, none of their coworkers knew because they acted like professionals within the hospital walls. Even the thought of hooking up inside the hospital used to make him almost physically sick- how could these doctors not show one bit of self control at work? But with Lexie, it was pathetically easy for him to forget what self control was. They spent so much time apart that when they finally did get together again, it was like something lit up inside of him: he couldn't get enough of her once all of those feelings that had been eating him alive- need, longing, passion- were finally released. And even the smallest thing was enough to light up the fire inside of him. One stole glance during rounds, or an "accidental" touch while they were working with the diagnosis team was enough to distract him for the rest of the day- and then he wasn't able to think about anything else at all until he could get her alone. 

On the middle of a particular crazy shift, after he had spent all day thinking about the little glance she had given him during rounds followed by the smallest lip bite, he ran into her just outside an on-call room and he had no choice but to take her inside before she could say anything. He immediately locked the door and pushed her against it, kissing her in a way that made her knees weak.

"Dr. Ramsey, what was that for?" she asked him with a mischievous glint on her eyes, a little breathless with her arms still around his neck. He looked at her with so much intensity that she thought she would melt.

"I have been thinking about you all day, Lexie. I couldn't wait to get my hands on you" he said, leaning down to kiss her neck. She let out a soft gasp, tenderly threading her fingers through the soft hair on the back of his head.  

"Well, this is way more fun than running labs, so please carry on" she pulled him to her lips again, moaning quietly into his mouth as his hands explored her back underneath her scrubs, his touch setting her skin on fire.

Their kisses grew more heated and passionate as they both stumbled across the room until the back of her knees hit one of the bunk beds and she fell down with a loud thud, pulling him on top of her. Their mouths didn’t part as Lexie pushed his white coat over his shoulders to the floor.

They kept kissing urgently on the small bed as their hands explore each other's bodies, but just as Ethan reached to pull her scrub top over her head, they were interrupted by the beep of a pager.

"Ughhh" she groaned as she reached to check her device "It's not mine" 

He kissed her jaw and picked up his pager from where it was tossed on the floor, somewhere inside the pocket of his white coat.

"It's not mine either."

"What?"

"Uh, actually, it's mine" they heard a voice above them. Fuck.

Ethan and Lexie just looked at each other and froze, not sure about what to do- not sure if there was anything they could do at this point. Just then, they felt someone moving on the bed above them and watched, petrified, as Bryce climbed out of the bunk bed and looked at them with a smirk on his face.

"I was wondering how long you two were going to make out like that before you realize you weren’t alone" he said, picking up his stethoscope and hanging it around his neck.  

Lexie was the first to break out of their shocked state- she gently created some distance between her and Ethan, pointlessly trying to regain some of her dignity. She could feel her face burning and couldn't bring herself to look at Bryce's face- he didn't even have to say anything to tease her, just one look would be enough to let her know he would never ever let her forget about this.

"Bryce, I'm so sorry, we obviously thought we were alone in here and we know on-call rooms are for sleeping and not for- well, you know- but..." Lexie finally met his eyes as she desperately tried to explain herself but the surgeon cut her off, holding his hands up in mocking defense.

"Hey, relax. I don't care about what you do in here. I mean, I've definitely thought about pushing a certain hot paramedic inside an on-call room more than once, so no judgment. Let me just grab my stuff and I'll be out of here in a second and you can get back at it" he said with a bright smile, trying to ease the tension. Ethan had not said a word this whole time- he looked like he wanted to bury himself in the floor or punch Bryce but wasn't sure about which one he should do first. Instead, he cleared his throat.

"Uh, Dr. Lahela isn't it?" Ethan asked, his voice not as firm as it usually was. Bryce noded, trying as hard as he could to keep a straight face. "I would appreciate if you didn't mention what you saw here to anyone. Given our situation, I'm sure you can understand a need for some, uh, discretion"

"Don't worry, your secret is safe with me. Next time, just make sure you're alone." he said and then smirked at the two flustered doctors, deciding to tease them just a bit more "Or, you know, you could ask me to join you, you two look hot together."

Ethan mouth hang open in shock as Bryce winked at them.

“Okay Bryce, time to leave. Don’t you have someone to cut open right now?” Lexie jumped off the bed and practically shoved a laughing Bryce out of the room, her face impossibly red.

Once he was out of the room, she shut and locked the door behind her with a heavy sigh. Ethan buried his face on his hands and groaned.

She opened her eyes and looked at Ethan- who seemed at least as flustered as she felt- and as their eyes met, they both burst out laughing. Out of breath, she closed the distance between them and sat by his side on the bed, still laughing. He wrapped an arm around her and pulled her closer, smiling.

"I don't think I'll ever be able to look into Dr. Lahela's face again" Ethan said while he laid down and pulled her to lay with him, arms around each other. She turned on her stomach and rested her chin on his chest, looking up at him. As his blue eyes stared into hers, she decided to take a risk.

"Maybe we should tell people about us, Ethan. What happened today would be uncomfortable no matter what, but we were lucky it was only Bryce here. What if it had been someone else? Someone who might not had taken it as easily as he did? Maybe we should come clean before anyone uses it against us. If we really have nothing to hide, why are we keeping it a secret, you know?" Lexie tried to read his face but he was as stoic as ever. Her emotional side wanted to scream at the top of her lungs that she and Ethan were in a relationship, but her rational side knew it was better to keep it low for as long as they could. It was delusional to think that everyone would take it as smoothly as Bryce did- and being a female resident in a relationship with an attending, she knew they would come for her, not him. But as she looked deeply into his eyes, she realized she didn’t give a shit about what other people could say or think.

“You’re right. Are you sure that’s what you want?” he asked, gently pushing her dark bangs off her face. He knew it as well as she did that their relationship could negatively affect her career and reputation more than his, and he would never forgive himself if their relationship was the reason why she had a future and career anything less than extraordinary. She smiled and took his hand on hers, bringing it to her lips and kissing it with a soft glow on her eyes.

“Yeah, I’m sure” I’m ready to tell the world you’re mine.

He gave her a rare, true smile- one of those that could light up even her darkest moments, that made her sure they could get through this as long as they had each other’s backs. She couldn’t help but smile with him as he pulled her face to his, kissing her deeply.

It didn’t take long until the kiss grew more heated, and soon enough her hands found their way to the buttons of his shirt.

“We can tell people later, don't you think?" she said, kissing his neck. He mumbled an agreement and pulled her to straddle his lap, running his hand through the side of her body. She smirked and unbuttoned his shirt slowly. "Now, where were we before we got interrupted?"

Just like that, Bryce’s interruption was quickly forgotten and they went back to do what they originally went to on-call room for.

[staytiny-angel]

Like, Subscribe, and Love 1/?

A WWE/YouTuber AU

A collaboration by @mondaynightrollynch and @scream-qween

Main Pairing: Becky Lynch/Seth Rollins

Rating: T for now

Warnings: None for now.

Summary: YouTube is the family business for 22 year-old Seth Rollins, he and his siblings all have very successful channels and his parents own the management company that they all work for. Seth's life is good even if he's lonely...until Becky Lynch comes crashing into his world and changes everything.

Taglist: @finnsauroraborealis @biforbecky2belts @the-beastslayers-queen @neversatisfiedgirl @sethsevolution

"Why are all of of you losers in my apartment this time?" Seth said throwing his leather jacket on to the sole empty chair in his living room where his siblings had set up camp.

"Cause you actually went grocery shopping yesterday unlike SOME people" Roman says with a pointed glare at Mox.

"How the fuck was I supposed to know it was my turn?" Jon shot back

"Because we have a system?" Roman replied.

"Wait, so y'all came to my house to eat up my shit and drink my beer instead of…I don't know….going to a fucking store" Seth says shaking his head "Some days I wish Mom and Dad had stopped at me." He signed

"Aww, Don't say that Sethie...you know you love us." Ruby said taking a sip of one of her fussy baby brother's craft beers. "Oh haha" Seth said sarcastically. "Any ideas for a new video?" He asked his youngest sister.

"I keep trying to convince Sarah and Liv to do Fleetwood Mac but they want to do Black Veil Brides" Ruby huffed, falling to the couch dramatically. "They...do know Andy's our brother right?" Roman asked confused. "I...kinda....haven't....told...them" Ruby, if even possible sunk lower.

"Ruby" Jon teased. "What Jon?! Do you go around telling everyone your brother is the lead singer of a rock band?!" "Yeah, I do. Better than telling people all my lame brothers and sisters do is Internet shit"

The rest of his brothers and sisters glare at him in unison. "If your gonna break into my apartment and drink my beer could you at least not insult how I make a fucking living?" Seth says rolling his eyes

"Yeah Moxie that ain't cool." Ruby agrees, shaking her head

"Besides, Renee would kick your ass if she heard you considering she does 'internet shit' for a living too" Roman chimed in.

"And don't say reviewing movies is different because that's exactly what Rhea does" Ruby added.

Jon looked mad before shutting his mouth and looking at the ceiling, while Seth's phone chimed. He had a notification from a Twitter page he followed called WWE News.

"Just in, @TheGamerLynch has surpassed @CrossFitGameGeek as the most subscribed gaming channel on YouTube. Congrats to Becky but we hope Seth bounces back soon"

"Damn" Seth jumped at Ruby reading over his shoulder.

"Nah, it's cool." Seth says "She plays some stuff I don't that's really popular right now. You know I don't really do fighting games and MK11 is what everyone is hype about, she's GOOD" he explains

"You do better during football season right, Seth?" Roman says

"Madden is life, so yes I do better when everyone is in football mode" he replied. "Even though the Bears SUCK!" Ruby yelled, Seth sending his sister a glare before saying "You aren't allowed here if you insult my team"

Ruby mumbled but otherwise kept quiet. Seth stared at his Twitter before proceeding to type up a tweet of his own.

"Congrats to @TheGamerLynch for becoming a top channel. Love your MK11 series even if I don't actually play it myself 😂" He hesitated for a moment. Would gossip channels think he was jealous or something? He pushed back the thought and posted it

-

"Holy hell, Seth Rollins tweeted me" Becky Lynch gripped her phone in shock.

"Who?" her brother's girlfriend Violet asked

"Seth Rollins?! He runs CrossFitVideoGameGeek, a top gaming channel, I just beat him out in the rankings and he congratulated me! Says he watches my MK series even though he doesn't play it" the flame haired girl said excitedly.

"I don't do video games but congrats I guess" Violet shrugged, turning to her notes for a new true crime video she was working on.

"Do you think the internet would explode if they found out LegoClub and WonderLandGhost were dating?" Becky asked her older brother, Finn Balor. "Huh? Oh-yeah, maybe. I try to keep my life private, y'know that"

"Yeah yeah" Becky waved at him, looking at her phone. "What should I say back? I can't ignore him" "Ask for a collab?" Violet spoke up, "You always complain about us not playing games with you"

"But...I'm scared" Becky admitted.

"Why?" Finn asked

"Didn't you just beat this guy? " Violet says

"Yeah, but....2 things. Thing the first..." Becky turns around her IPad and shows them the handsome, glasses wearing gamer "He's really cute....sometimes he does cross fit workouts and games shirtless. Thing the second....his parents run NXT. He's totally outta my league"

"NXT? That big channel management company?" Finn asked. "Yeah, he's probably planning a way to beat me, probably do a challenge where he strips every time he curses" Becky whined.

"You do know NXT reaches out to channels that have at least 5 million subscribers right?" Violet, Becky looking at her immediately. "I got a email about it, I could set up a meeting with them and you could talk to Rollins" "Seriously?!" Becky exclaimed

"I've been doing some research into them. All three of us meet their qualifications and unlike most of these companies they have an amazing reputation. Mr and Mrs McMahon-Helmsley started it because a few of their kids got fucked by Channel Awesome." Violet explained.

"You would give your channel to them?" Becky asked, knowing how adamant she was about not selling out. "Can't make money if I keep getting demonitized" The goth woman said, being pulled into a hug.

"We should at least set up a meeting." Finn says wrapping his arms around his girlfriend while looking at his sister.

"I know we've always said we would never do something like this but... If we want to go further with our channels, if we can find a company that will actually take care of us without us having to sell our souls? We should at least hear them out." Violet tells her

"It would be helpful to not have to edit my swearing" Becky says

[diningpageantry]

Scales, Fins, and other Fishy Daydreams

Archive Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18215168/chapters/43151156

Chapter 3/10 of It’s A Handheld Disaster

Word Count: 1553

Chapter Summary: Baz takes Simon's shitpost text a step further, and the outcome ends up spreading a few rumors.

SIMON

bi-sammy: sammy would still fuck huxley if he looked like the fish from shape of water

I grin smugly at my screen, sitting in a dark room with nothing shining but my mobile. The shutters stay shut, and the light from the bottom of the doorway barely filters into the room. It’s just me, this scratchy blanket, and Baz, somewhere else in England on another screen. I absolutely adore that.

gaystrell: why would you say something so controversial yet so brave.jpg

Sometimes, I catch myself smiling. Other times, I elect to ignore how real it feels. It’s weird, given that it feels like I’m just chatting with someone who I see everyday. The casualness of this reminds me of texting Penny in the afternoon on a Thursday.

Except, given the current time, it could be interpreted as more intimate than that of a friend’s text.

8am on a Saturday is usually a time reserved for comfort. For staying warm with someone you care about. Instead, I’m just messaging Baz.

bi-sammy: because im right

bi-sammy: hear me out here ive got a brilliant idea

gaystrell: whoever taught you the definition of a brilliant idea was clearly misleading you

bi-sammy: dont be an arse until youve heard it

bi-sammy: wanker

gaystrell: you’re truly proving your point

bi-sammy: ANYWAY

bi-sammy: shape of water au

bi-sammy: thats all

gaystrell: i’m appalled.

gaystrell: hold on.

I don’t think much of it. Occasionally, he disappears for an hour to two. I don’t bother asking, assuming it’s none of my business, but I do tend to worry a bit. I hope he’s alright.

After clicking off my phone, my head settles against my pillow as my eyes fall shut.

There’s something about this. There’s something about him. It’s a bit hard to pinpoint what it is, but the overwhelming feeling of comfort I have in the notifications I get from him just answering my bullshit is incredibly welcomed. He’s semisweet. I don’t know why I didn’t see it earlier, but he’s a fantastically bitter person.

My head slowly turns over, eyes opening and straining in the darkness.

I hate my empty room.

I hate the absence of comfort--I hate the plainness of these walls.

I want to say I hate my foster dad, but I also feel like I’m not allowed to say that. Not because the system will take me again and throw me back (even though I could have left a year back, if I was still in it). Instead, I feel like I shouldn’t hate him. Theoretically, I should be thankful for what I have. I’m not in a boy’s home, and I haven’t been since I was 11, but the remnants remain. The fights don’t go away, and neither do the weeks of starvation.

Still, I sort of despise living here under Davy.

That’s what he makes me call him. His name. His nickname. Not dad; of course not dad. He’s had me in his care for roughly six years, but he’s still Davy to me.

Shitty fucking Davy, with his strict curfews and practically using me as a housemaid because he’s too cheap to care for himself.

Shitty fucking Davy, not letting me add anything to my room because the day I turn 18, I’m out of here until his next kid (and cheque, apparently) come in. Told me I’d wreck the walls and ruin his furniture if I did put anything on it, too.

So that’s what I’ve got. Blank walls, blank furniture, blank everything. It’s like a jail cell for a bedroom, and everything I’ve got to show for myself is in a backpack and two dresser drawers/

But, at least, I own my mobile.

Every summer job, mixed with odds and ends shit and whatever I can do for my bill. It’s all mine, and Davy can’t fucking touch it.

Maybe that’s why, when I feel it buzz against my chest, it makes me feel more alive. It’s a reminder of all that work just to be able to talk to someone freely.

Arguably, the best feeling in the goddamn world.

I grab it and flip it over. It’s just an email about uni.

Fuck.

I end up scrolling through tumblr for a little while, doing nothing but liking and reblogging a thing here or there. It takes a little while before a little drop down falls from the top of my screen.

gaystrell: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1r7Wkwj7MSFk0--DgquHGhYVBbqneEYq0J01t0uMRmxA/edit?usp=sharing

gaystrell: feel the need to apologize before you click the link, but then again, you asked for this hell

When I click on it, it pulls up a doc titled just “crackfic”, and I’m floored with the first sentence alone.

“Fuck my fish ass harder, daddy.”

My hand flies up, covering my mouth as I practically wheeze as quietly as possible. A few paragraphs in and I’m nearly crying into my palm, muffling my laughter as I read through pages upon pages of the most ridiculous fic I’ve ever laid my eyes upon.

I check the word count out of pure curiosity, and it somehow makes me laugh harder.

bi-sammy: holy fucking shit

bi-sammy: i swear to god if you don’t post that i will

gaystrell: already in the process of making the archive post

gaystrell: i seriously believe you underestimate my sincere ability to be the biggest dick on the street

bi-sammy: i dont know whether or not u meant that as ur literal dick or the big dick energy in making that a post but id probably agree with you in both

bi-sammy: tag me in the post pls i want to be the first to reblog it

gaystrell: you’re a ridiculous, sad, little man

gaystrell: of course i’ll tag you

Within minutes, it’s uploaded with the absolute worst slew of Archive tags attached to it, and as soon as he tags me in his post, I tap the notification.

Scales, Fins, and other Fishy Daydreams

Word Count: 3,192

Summary: Fish!Huxley and Sam get it on Shape of Water style

@bi-sammy this is your fault (you're welcome)

I immediately slam like and pull up reblog, rapidly typing out my response before posting.

absolute madman. cant believe youve done this. i trust you with my entire life.

As usual, he's quick to reblog back.

anything for the absolute pain in my life x

Smiling shamelessly, I ride on the moment's high as our conversation stays out in the world. I quite enjoy this version of his softness. The public, taunting replies to mine. In all this time of following him, I can't really recall him ever being this friendly with anyone but me.

Makes me feel special. Maybe too much so.

BAZ

The jarring shock of the seemingly endless notifications rattles me momentarily speechless.

It isn't even 15 minutes after I'd replied to Snow and there's already a few people reblogging it with comments about him and I. A quick “i ship y'all’ to “powermove of the century”. Each make me flush deeper as the replies flood in.

If I were to be practical, I'm aware that I shouldn't be so flustered over the concept of us being a couple. It's most likely my overactive, sad, lonely imagination, but the idea of being loved just makes me blush. Especially since it's someone who doesn't seem to absolutely loathe me.

gaystrell: are you reading these?

bi-sammy: the what?

bi-sammy: i have. nothing to read. i cant read.

gaystrell: use your two remaining brain cells look at the notes for the crackfic

bi-sammy: holy shit

bi-sammy: im cackling

A notification pops up, making me snort this time. I pull up the post and send it off to him without a second thought.

gaystrell: sent a post

gaystrell: “sounds like something huxley would do for sam”

bi-sammy: stop im gonna piss myself shits too fucking funny

I pull it back up, scrolling down to reblog and adding a quick reply that, in all honesty, I should have thought out more. Secretly, part of me is glad that I sent it.

huxley wishes he was this smooth ;)

Within seconds, replies flood in from everywhere. From jokes about Snow and I possibly dating to the concept of Huxley writing (purposefully) shitty homoerotica about himself as a fishman. I quite like the conversation about the latter, while the former makes my chest knot in ways inexplicable.

Going through the notes makes me smile, even if it's mildly embarrassing. The amount of times I've seen the eyes emoji used is definitely excessive, but still somewhat welcomed.

Even my archive has a few comments already, although more based around the fic itself. More ironically, though, is the one person who probably took it seriously and just commented, “Nice fic!” I love the abundance of shameless appreciation for obscure fanfiction in the depths of this community.

Snow's messages roll down my mobile screen as I'm checking the comments, continuously replacing the previous message for the top slot.

bi-sammy: mate

bi-sammy: i love you

bi-sammy: also every time you reblog something of mine i get like 5 followers

bi-sammy: if you mention me i get 10

bi-sammy: youre???????????? a god????????

bi-sammy: can i marry you????????????

I slowly close my laptop, eyes on my phone with an absolutely gleeful grin.

gaystrell: when and where?

[andrewmoocow]

Gravity Soul chapter 11: Escape to Death City, Home of the DWMA? (originally posted on October 28, 2018)

AN: Hello again ladies, gentlemen and every other rainbow in-between, welcome back to Gravity Soul! Last chapter our heroes were forced to flee after losing to Kishin Cipher, and their chosen hiding spot? None other than DEATH CITY! New bonds are built and our heroes decide to get stronger in order to properly take the monstrosity on. Some of these I've been wanting to tackle for a while ever since I even started conceptualizing so I hope you'll love them as much as I do.

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All was quiet in Death City, Nevada. The 1800s-esque cobblestone streets were empty for mere moments until a green portal decorated with various arithmetic symbols shined into view and out of it came the Mystery Meisters, now fresh off their departure from Gravity Falls. "So this is Death City!" Ford declared in amazement. "Have to say, really admire the rustic feel of it."

As the crew gazed around the city with wonder, Dipper on the other hand was more mindful of the suddenly anthropomorphic sun, which sported a wide smile emitting a booming laugh. "Hey, I got a question!" he exclaimed. "Why is the sun suddenly alive here yet normal in Gravity Falls? Is it some kind of magic or something?"

"It's best that you not think about it." Death the Kid stated before he looked onward. "Let's get going everybody, the Academy shouldn't be faraway." He led everybody else through the streets of Death's turf, giving them a tour of it along the way.

"Whoa, everything looks so creepy!" Mabel exclaimed gazing through a shop window. "Makes me wish we brought some cameras to take pictures of the place." Wendy added joining her in staring through the window. "Lord Death's face is everywhere. I know he owns the place, but I feel like this is too much." Dipper stated before his eyes wandered to find a nearby ice cream shop. "And is that some kinda parody of Baskin-Robbins?"

"Here it is, our faithful school!" Maka declared after some more sightseeing gesturing towards the school itself high above the rest of the city with flights of white stairs below. It looked more like a macabre funhouse once again with Death's face with red spire roofs, candles jutting out of the building and a group of three skulls anointing the entrance. And above the school was a group of three black orbs mysteriously floating in the air.

"Talk about some bizarre architecture dude! This is definitely going up on my list of inspirations for my dream house!" Soos remarked pulling out a piece of paper with some crude drawings of buildings on it. "It's gonna have a water slide, a bouncy house for an elevator, and trees that can turn into giant super fighting robots!"

"So do we have to climb all these steps?" Pacifica wondered putting a foot on the first stair. "Yeah pretty much." Patty said just as she immediately bolted for the entrance. "RACE Y'ALL!"

"Patty, this is no time for games!" Maka exclaimed racing after her. "We still need to talk with Death and get his help in stopping Kishin Cipher!"

"We literally just got back from nearly dying Maka, can you lighten up a bit?" Black Star said zooming up the stairs. "How can I lighten up when I just-"

"Lost Soul, we know." Tsubaki interrupted her. "We all miss him too but I don't think that's a very healthy way to express your feelings." she stated. "Speaking of losing someone, where's Mr. Pines?"

"How much longer Soos?" Ford moaned as he, Soos and Pacifica became tuckered out from climbing the stairs. "I think we're still in the tens Mr. Pines." the manchild answered. "Well by the time we join the others, I'm going to punch whoever constructed this place. After I throw up."

The hallways of the Death Weapon Meister Academy proved themselves to be very grandiose. As far as the Mystery Meisters could see, they were surrounded by fancy corridors with arched ceilings that almost seemed like a maze.

"Wow, this place is so fancy!" Mabel exclaimed in awe. "And these must be all your classmates too!" She began waving to everyone that passed by until she unexpectedly bumped into a strange blue man. "Oh sorry mister! Didn't mean to run into you like that."

"It's fine missy." the man answered turning to meet the Pines twins, revealing his pupil-less eyes and piglike snout. "Say, aren't you those kids Death was talking to a while ago?" he asked. "Oh my gosh, it's a zombie!" Dipper exclaimed. "Quick, did we pack any formaldehyde and cinnamon in case we run into situations like this?!"

"Hey calm down guys, he won't eat your brains!" Black Star calmed them down. "Speaking of which, we'd like you to meet Sid Barrett. He helps out Lord Death round these parts and is also my dad." he introduced the zombie. "Wait, he's your father? Guess your mom must be some kind of necrophile!" McGucket remarked, which earned him a smack on the head. "Okay I'm sorry! Maybe she's a necromancer instead!"

"Actually, I'm his adoptive dad." Sid answered. "His real dad was a maniac who had to be put down." he added. "I would later raise the kid as my own until I died and came back to life. I couldn't bring myself to kill a baby, cause that's the kind of man I was."

"Y'know, I actually was a zombie once!" Soos remarked. "But I'm not sure if I looked anything like you sir." he stated. "Thanks for your observation, but this is no time for chit-chat. Shinigami said he wants to see you." Sid declared. "Especially the kids."

"Thank you very much Sid, we'll make a note of that." Kid stated before starting to move again. "Come along everyone, his room should be close." he said leading the others away.

Many steps through the labyrinthian halls later, a strange door with a skull face at the top stood before them. "This should be the place." Stein announced beginning to open the door. "Now right this way."

Within moments, the denizens of Gravity Falls found themselves underneath a series of guillotines lined up like a tunnel. "Are any of these going to chop off our heads?" Dipper wondered fearfully gazing up at the tunnel's ceiling. "No it won't you guys, you just still need some adjusting to things!" Spirit claimed. "Now come on, Death shouldn't be kept waiting."

A strange looking room greeted them at the end of the guillotines. The walls almost looked like the sky and a large platform where Death's mirror was situated was surrounded with many crosses planted into the ground that resembled a desert. "Hello, Lord Death? It's us, the Pines family!" Dipper called, but he received no answer. "Where is he anyway? Sid said he should be here to greet us."

"Salutations kiddos!" Lord Death loudly greeted them suddenly appearing on the mirror, shocking them all. "Oh I am terribly sorry, please forgive me for startling you." he apologized exiting the mirror to see them all face to face. "No, we should apologize for being so impatient!" Dipper exclaimed dropping to his hands & knees and bowing his head. "And also failing to stop Asura & Bill."

"Greetings Death, it is a pleasure to meet you face to face." Ford greeted the Shinigami with a respectful bow. "It's good to meet you too Stanford." Death gingerly greeted back before his tone became solemn. "And I am also terribly sorry about what happened to your brother."

"Hey there man!" Wendy casually greeted Death much to Maka's displeasure. "Shouldn't you be more respectful?" she chided the cashier. "What, you mean like this?" Wendy asked before she bowed as well. "Yeah, that's good enough."

"And I assume these must be your friends as well!" Death exclaimed. "So let me get this straight. This place is run by the literal Grim Reaper itself?!" Pacifica gasped in shock. "Why yes indeed young lady." the Death God answered before making his voice deeper and more menacing. "And I should be expecting your soul very soon."

The blonde girl trembled in her boots before Death chuckled in his regular voice. "Just kidding miss!" he assured her with a pat on her head, making her shiver. "So what is this place anyway? I know it's some kinda school but what's it for?" Gideon wondered. "That is a very good question little one!" Lord Death answered before clearing his throat. "Allow me to explain."

"Welcome to the Death Weapon Meister Academy, also known as the DWMA or Shibusen." he began expositing in an announcer's voice. "It stands as a defense against the forces of evil, which would plunge the world into darkness & drag humanity to the very depths of fear and madness, the demons known as Kishin and their insatiable hunger for destruction."

"To ensure the Kishin never regained their hold on this world, this academy was founded by the Grim Reaper, Death himself!" He then switched back to his normal voice. "So basically, we're an organization that exists to protect & preserve peace!" Death exclaimed. "I guess it's not exactly a typical school. Oh well, that isn't important!" he said forming his hands out of his cloak, clasping them together and pointing at the Mystery Meisters. "For now, let's roll up our sleeves and get to work!"

"Work on what sir?" Soos asked as the speech ended. "Why, getting you all ready to face Kishin Cipher! That's why I plan on temporarily enrolling you all at my academy." Death announced to the shock of the party. "We're actually going to become students here?! That sound awesome!" Mabel exclaimed hopping up and down but Wendy only groaned. "Aw man, I seriously wanted to get away from school. Well, at least this place will be less boring."

"Which reminds me, you should all be assigned students to room with." Lord Death said pulling out a tall stack of paperwork and examining it with a pair of glasses. "Let's see, the Pines shall share Maka's apartment. Ms. Corduroy & Mr. Ramirez shall sleep with Black Star & Tsubaki and finally Mr. Gleeful, Ms. Northwest and Mr. McGucket shall move in with my son."

"Uh how did you get our names? We didn't even introduce ourselves yet!" Dipper wondered. "That's also unimportant. Now go along and retreat to your assigned living spaces." Death answered. "I'll see you all soon for your first classes!" With that, the Death God vanished back into his mirror leaving his platform empty.

"Guess that's his way of saying we should get moving." Stein stated with a puff of his cigarette. "I'll see you later. Gonna need to take care of some business." He began leaving the Death Room as the party began going their separate ways. "I'll have you know I live in a very fine & symmetrical mansion." Kid warned Pacifica, Gideon & McGucket. "So if any of you dare disrupt that symmetry, there will be serious consequences."

"I hope you can make yourselves comfortable at our place you two." Tsubaki said to Soos & Wendy. "I can only assume you have some sorta Japanese aesthetic goin' on?" the rotund ex-handyman asked. "I'm asking because y'know, you're both ninjas."

"I wonder if your place is large enough to hold two young girls, two boys, a cat lady, a pig, a sword and an old man like myself." Ford mused preparing to leave as well. "Just make yourselves at home while I take care of my own business." Maka muttered before Spirit suddenly appeared behind her. "Have fun with your new roommates sweetie! And if Dipper tries to make a move on-" Without another word, Maka chopped her father in the face.

"You know what, you can go on ahead kids. I'd still like to speak with Death about Bill." Ford suggested. "Okay, see you soon Ford!" Dipper exclaimed as the children finally exited the Death Room, leaving the scientist alone with the Shinigami, who popped out of his mirror to speak. "Is there any thoughts you want to share with me Mr. Pines? I'm all ears!"

"It's about Bill Cipher sir. You claimed you faced him hundreds of years ago, but how did he manage to find you?" Ford asked as the two of them sat down to some tea. "You almost seem bound to this place, so there's no way you could've gone outside of it to meet him."

"It was actually eight centuries ago when I had first come to blows with Bill." Death explained sipping his tea. "He had actually originally appeared to me, claiming that if we struck a deal, he could help me purge the world of all evils forever and ever. But of course, that was all a lie."

"You did what?!" Ford exclaimed in terror, spitting out his tea. "Sincere apologies for startling you Stanford. I suppose you may have dealt with Cipher as well." Lord Death contemplated. "Indeed I have Shinigami," the six-fingered great uncle confirmed. "for similar reasons as you. He called himself a muse that said I was one of many brilliant minds I chose each century to assist. But obviously, he used me for his own plans as well."

"And according to you, he has returned and fused with Asura as well." Death continued on. "Oh yeah speaking of which, when we left Gravity Falls I heard Asura call your son his 'pesky little brother.' What did he mean by that?" Ford asked again, this time the question made Death nervous before he finally accepted what has now happened. "I've been keeping this secret for ages now, in which only a very small few know it as well, but it's finally time I admitted it." he sighed. "Asura is actually my son."

"My God, it cannot be." Ford gasped. "Though I guessed there may have been some form of connection between him and Kid beforehand, especially due to the similar stripes in their hair, but I never guessed they would be your actual children." he stated. "And another thing, if you're their father then who's the mother?"

"I actually never married. Asura & Kid are just chunks of myself I pulled out and made their own beings. Asura represented my fear while I just wanted a free-roaming Death God which resulted in Kid." Death continued on. "I worry that if I reveal this to him, he wouldn't trust me anymore since I'm basically the father of the ultimate evil. And as for Asura, while I detest him for what he's done in the past, I'm also concerned for what Bill could do to him since he's a completely insane monster."

"I see." Ford commented looking up at one of the windows in Death's room, noticing that the sky was turning red. "I hate to run sir, but the kids should be expecting me to return soon." he stated preparing to return to his great-nephew & niece. "But I promise that your secret is safe with me."

"Good on you Ford. The only others that know it are Sid, my Death Scythes, Excalibur and a few others associates of mine." Death said as Ford finally left. "But I feel the secret won't be kept between us all for long."

"I'm back everyone!" Ford announced stepping into Maka's apartment. "It took me a while to actually find this place, but thankfully Spirit was there to lend me a hand." he stated. "So kids, how are you adjusting?"

"We're doing great Grunkle Ford, this is a great new experience for us!" Mabel exclaimed stepping out of a bedroom. "By the way, you're gonna get Soul's room while Dipper & I sleep on the couch." she added. "Plus Dipper & Maka are already doing nerd stuff in her room."

"Well it's good you're getting used to things. Now what's for dinner?" Ford wondered. "I know, why don't have some smoked sausages?" Blair asked suddenly appearing wearing only an apron with a wiener dog in her hand, much to Ford's alarm as he covered Mabel's eyes. "Don't you have any form of decency furball?!"

"Oh cut me some slack Sixer, with Soul gone I gotta have someone to have fun with." Blair stated defensively. "And besides you are a bit of a silver fox yourself." she playfully cooed before going her own way, leaving Ford aghast and Mabel's innocence preserved. "Seriously, what is a silver fox?!"

Meanwhile in Maka's room, Dipper & Maka were busy chatting and looking through her various books. "Wow, so you have your own weapon form as well? That seems utterly ridiculous and impossible." Dipper commented now sans his vest & shoes while Maka was also dressed more casually in a tanktop and sweatpants. "I agree, but it seems it can only appear when I'm knocked unconscious."

"Ooookay then." Dipper nervously replied before he spotted a framed postcard sitting on her desk. "Hey, what's this supposed to be?" he asked picking it up. "This actually came from my mother, which what inspired me to defeat Asura once and for all." Maka explained. "Everywhere she went, she made sure to send me a postcard of whatever destination she was in. This one in particular contains the Persian word for courage."

"Your mom must've really meant a lot to you if she keeps sending you postcards. Speaking of which, what caused her to not be present in your life?" the boy continued. "My dad was simply too much of a pervert, lusting after far too many other women which worsened our relationship." the Scythe Meister said. "In fact with Soul gone, he's probably the only Demon Scythe that I can use right now."

"Aw chin up, I'm sure you and your dad can patch things up somehow." Dipper assured Maka before Ford came calling for them. "Soup's on everyone! We're having smoked sausages tonight!"

"Let's just eat and later get ready for bed. Tomorrow's going to be your first day at the Academy." Maka stated hoisting Dipper onto her shoulders and carried him to the main room. "Wow, you're really strong for someone your age!"

"Thanks for the sushi dawg, feels like I haven't eaten anything in hours!" Soos thanked as he, Wendy, Black Star and Tsubaki sat down to some sushi she made. "Why thank you very much Soos. It's the best I can do for our guests." Tsubaki replied. "Yeah, make yourselves at home I guess." Black Star added. "So what are your lives like back at your home?"

"Well you probably know how my family is. I'm living with my abuelita, my dad just up & disappeared and my mom died too. But look at me now, still a jolly dude who's everyone's friend!" Soos exclaimed.

"And as for me, I got my dad and three bros, Marcus, Kevin & Gus." Wendy said pulling out a picture of herself and her aforementioned brothers when they were young. "We may get on each other's nerves a lot because manliness and all that, but we all still love each other."

"At least none of your brothers ever felt inferior to you to the point of wanting to become a Kishin!" Tsubaki nervously laughed before her expression turned somber, mourning the fall of her own brother.

"Good lord, look at you in that picture!" Black Star exclaimed staring at the picture, particularly the younger Wendy's hiked-up pants, pigtails & braces. "I'd say the years have been very kind to you Wendy." he complimented, making the lumberjack's daughter blush. "Oh, uh t-thanks Black Star."

"Oh, is that blush I spy Wendy? You got a thing for him?" Soos playfully mocked. "What, no she doesn't!" Black Star screamed. "My heart only belongs to one woman, and her name is The Path to Godhood!"

"Can you not Soos? I know you're only joking, but you're making everyone else nervous." Tsubaki gently scolded him, beginning to blush as well. "Sorry about that Baki." Soos retracted his earlier joke before he made an observation. "Hey, you're getting all red too! You perhaps jealous?"

"Oh just shut up already Soos." Wendy giggled with a sigh. "So you got any places for us to sleep here you guys?" she asked. "Oh I'm sure we could pull out a few spare mats." Tsubaki answered. "Wait, you're being serious? We're actually going to sleep on the floor?"

"It's okay Wendy, it's kinda like being in a sleeping bag. I looked it up on the Internet, and it says the Japanese always sleep on the floor." Soos assured her. "Which reminds me, you got any that can fit me?"

At Death the Kid's mansion, Pacifica, Gideon and Fiddleford were busy making themselves at home as well, sitting down in the dining room with Kid and the Thompsons. "Let us set some house rules everyone. Rule #1, everything must be kept absolutely symmetrical no matter what." the Immature Death God announced. "That especially goes for your Mr. McGucket, with your very looks and all."

"Well if you say so Kiddo, imma keep myself as sym-meteorite as possible!" McGucket claimed boldly, though the children he was now living with weren't so sure of it. "Now you got anything to eat here? I'm starving!"

"Pretty sure I can cook something up." Pacifica stated. "You can trust me, I've been working at Gravity Falls's local diner so I know my way around the kitchen."

"Yay, thanks Pazzy!" Patty exclaimed cheerfully. "It's honestly felt like ages since we had that gumbo at the Shack, I'm famished!" Liz added patting her stomach. "We are truly grateful for you offering to help us with dinner tonight Pacifica." Kid stated leading the younger girl to the kitchen. "So what do you think we should have anyway?"

The next day, far away in the outskirts of Death City, a young man dressed as a clergyman wearing a pair of headphones with Death's face on them bobbed his head to the music playing in them pulled up before the city in a dune buggy resembling a hearse and gazed at the Academy.

At the same time, a man wearing a large bear head appeared out of a coffee shop with a monkey wearing a backwards baseball cap clinging onto his shoulders.

A tall & large Russian man with a large nose wearing heavy winter clothes stepped out of an alleyway followed by another slimmer man with a bearskin hat and duffle coat.

A darker-skinned fellow stepped toward the Academy as well with white war paint on his face in the shape of a keyhole. Along with him was a taller man with a large afro, a pleated sarong and nothing covering his torso.

Another man appeared, his clothing much more loose and a turban covering his entire face. Beside him was a beautiful young woman dressed as a belly dancer.

Finally another lady made herself known, an Asian woman in formal attire who pushed up her glasses with a stern look on her face.

"Lord Death, all your weapons have arrived." Stein confirmed to Death in his room. "And this time, everyone is here."

"Excellent Stein," Lord Death replied. "tell everyone to meet here and we shall make preparations for Operation: Apple of Discord."

Meanwhile at Maka's apartment, the Pines were getting ready for their first day as temporary students at the DWMA. Mabel put the finishing touches on a scabbard she had made for her brother, which was pink in color with a silver metal tip, various ornate gold decorations and a pine tree symbol in the center. "C'mon Dipper, we don't wanna be late! Plus I got a surprise for you!"

"Be with you in a bit Mabel, just gotta do a few more pushups for Excalibur." Dipper groaned struggling to do more warmups under the guidance on the Holy Sword while Blair innocently waved a flag around. "Keep moving Dipper, I don't know what I've been told but all that glitters isn't gold!" Excalibur barked. "You do realize that those two sayings don't make any sense together, right?!" his new Meister panted before his arms finally gave out. "Can we please be done now?"

Pulling out a stopwatch, Excalibur examined it for a bit before giving his answer. "Yes indeed, you have completed all exercises in the allotted time." he answered. "Great, cause lookie what I got for you bro-bro!" Mabel exclaimed revealing her scabbard to Dipper. "Oh yeah, that looks uh, great Mabel."

"FOOL!" Excalibur cried smacking Dipper with the end of his cane. "I sense a bit of nervousness in your tone my boy. Could it perhaps be the color?" he suggested. "Don't let any gender stereotypes bring you down, just accept that your sister has made you a lovely gift."

With that, Excalibur changed into his weapon form to allow Dipper to insert him into his new sheath, which he hung over his shoulder. "Come along kids, the Academy can't be kept waiting!" Ford called about to step out of the door. "Trust us, you're going to love it there!" Maka added and the twins joined them and Crona on their way to the school, leaving Blair and Waddles behind.

Much later, the group had arrived at the front doors of the Death Weapon Meister Academy. Each of them, especially the Pines, knew this would bring them one step closer to stopping Kishin Cipher, rescuing their loved ones and saving Gravity Falls.

Just then, Kid & the Thompsons stepped towards them with Pacifica, Gideon & McGucket in tow along with Black Star, Tsubaki, Soos & Wendy. "Mornin' dudes, you ready for your first day of school?" Soos asked them. "Well since we're coming here during the summer, I guess this would sort of count as summer school."

"You're going to be in the EAT class with us." Black Star stated. "Just as a fair warning, things can get pretty crazy in there so try to keep your heads down."

"Thank you very much Black Star." Ford said pushing open the doors. "Now come along children, we've got work to do!" Suddenly he was interrupted when he opened it to find Stein already inside waiting for him. "Death wants to see you Stanford."

"Oh, me?" Ford wondered. "I am terribly sorry to come and go everyone, but I am needed elsewhere. I'll see you all later!" he quickly apologized stepping through the entrance and walking away with Stein, leaving the kids, Soos & McGucket to wonder what he was needed for.

"So what is your reasoning for pulling me aside Franken?" the author wondered as he was led by Stein back to the Death Room. "Lord Death wants you to join in on a little meeting he's holding with some of his colleagues." the Meister answered letting him inside the room where the Death God was standing before Sid & Spirit along with a host of other colorful characters. "I can only assume these are the other Death Scythes?"

"Indeed they are Stanford." a dark-skinned woman covered in bandages replied. "Mira Naigus, school nurse and DWMA CIA commander at your service Mr. Pines." she introduced herself shaking the scientist's hand. "They are Justin Law of Western Europe, Tezca Tlipoca & Enrique of South America, Tsar Pushka & Feodor of Russia, Dengu Dinga & Alexandre of Africa, Djinn Galland & Zubaidah of West Asia, Azusa Yumi of Oceania and finally...alright, where is she?"

"Where's who?" Ford asked. "Let me guess, Marie is lost again?" Tsar Pushka wondered as if he had experienced this before. Enrique the monkey chattered excitedly while hopping up & down which made Tezca cackle rolling on the floor. "You're right little buddy! Maybe it is because of that eyepatch!"

"Sorry I'm late everyone!" the voice of another young woman cried rushing into the Death Room. This woman in particular had blonde hair & was clad in a black dress with a large yellow zigzag pattern on it and an eyepatch with a lightning bolt symbol. Just the combination of the color scheme and choice of accessory alone made Ford both suspicious & nervous. "Again, sorry I'm late Death! Just got a little lost, as usual."

"Oh don't be Marie." Death stated. "Now then, we have gathered you all here today to discuss a new threat that has emerged and wreaking havoc upon the world. To further elaborate, I'd like to introduce you all to our guest Stanford Pines." he explained introducing Ford to the Death Scythes. "Greetings everyone. As you may know, I hail from a town in Oregon known as Gravity Falls that is currently undergoing serious peril."

"Could you please explain more about this threat Stanford?" Azusa asked. Before Ford could answer, Spirit hurriedly rushed to his side. "I'd try to keep my mouth shut around her if I were you." he whispered. "While she is very respectful, she's also a total bossyboots as well, which earned her the title Queen of the Committee Chairman."

"Excuse me Albarn, but Mr. Pines is trying to speak." Azusa scolded Spirit with a snap of her fingers. "Now please, return to your spot." Much to his chagrin, Spirit obliged as Ford continued to speak. "Anyways ladies and gentlemen, I'd like you to meet Bill Cipher." he announced making the triangle appear on Death's mirror. "A powerful dream demon originating from the second dimension, Bill is currently merged with the Kishin you may know as Asura and the two have made Gravity Falls their domain, hoping to extend their madness across the globe and potentially the rest of the universe as well."

"Are you serious, we're going up against some triangle?" Djinn Galland commented. "Do not be fooled by his simplistic appearance. Bill is a conniving, sadistic monster who can trick or possess anyone to get his way." Ford stated. "He is also highly intelligent, preferring to make deals with his victims to further his own evil deeds."

"Although he can't do much in the mindscape, in our physical realm he is pretty much omniscient. Telepathy, manipulation of things like time & matter, reality warping, the whole nine yards!" Death added. "Combined with Asura's own abilities and godlike Soul Wavelength, the two of them combined are nearly unstoppable."

"What do you mean by nearly sir?" Dengu Dinga asked. "Through some careful research, I was able to deduce that only a zodiac made up of twenty symbols representing 23 souls can create a force strong enough to terminate him." the polydactyl professor stated. Just then he noticed Justin Law barely paying attention and instead listening to his music. "Excuse me young man, we are currently having a discussion that we'd be happy to have you join in on."

"What?!" Justin shouted in Ford's face, much to his surprise. "I said, please take off your earphones and pay attention!" Ford shouted back. "Oh, I am terribly sorry, please proceed." the young Death Scythe politely apologized removing his earbuds. "As I was saying, we must organize a plan of attack on Cipher. One group shall go on ahead & distract him while another shall progress and finish off both him and his four Madnesses, Sloth, Wrath, Greed & Envy."

"Horosho, should be easy." Feodor remarked. "We just go in, wait for you to go after us and everything will be all fine and dandy." he stated. "Don't be so casual. As I stated, Bill can do pretty much anything when in the physical realm, so we must keep ourselves sane if we want to survive." Death said. "However there aren't many ways to keep him from going into our minds."

"I would suggest outfitting our skulls with metal plates since it's the only method we have on hand, but it's very painful." Ford stated. "Are you serious?" Sid wondered and the scientist only replied by knocking on his head, producing a loud clanging noise. "Okay, maybe I could use one of those."

"Oh great googly-moogly, it's almost time for class!" Ford exclaimed looking at his watch. "I hate to come in and run folks, but the twins should be waiting for me!"

"Very well then. Everybody here is dismissed!" Death declared clapping his hands, signaling for his weapons to disperse. As they began leaving the Death Room, Stein stepped up next to Ford. "Hey, I've got an offer for you." he said. "How do you feel about becoming a guest teacher today?"

"Why I'd be delighted Stein!" Ford exclaimed cheerfully. "I actually do have a few degrees so I might know my way around things." he added. "Excellent, I'll be there to assist you along with Marie here." Stein stated introducing him to the blonde woman.

"Oh hey, don't think Mira introduced me! I'm Marie Mjolnir from Oceania, pleased to meet you." Marie greeted, but Ford only returned her greeting with a cold glare. "Are you okay? Why are you giving me the stink-eye?"

In a large classroom filled with multiple academy students, Dipper & Mabel took their seats waiting for the teacher to appear. "What's taking Ford so long? Whatever business Death's got with him, I hope he isn't too preoccupied." Soos wondered sitting down with the twins. Just then a door opened and Stein appeared sitting backwards on a swivel chair and rolling backwards before he fell over. "Good morning class."

"Good morning Professor Stein." the students replied in unison. "Hiya Mr. Stein!" Mabel cried before she was met with a scalpel launched in her direction, only managing to hit the desk behind her. "Oops, sorry sir."

"Anyway, today we have a special guest to lead the class today." the Meister announced. "Ladies and gentlemen, I'd like you all to meet Mr. Stanford Pines." Ford then stepped into the room waving as the class applauded, with Soos cheering loudly. "Woo, we love ya Mr. Pines!"

Another scalpel flew in Soos's direction, again only managing to hit a nearby desk. "I'll keep my mouth shut." he squeaked ducking down. "Now then, let's get down to business." Ford announced writing his name on the board. "My name is Stanford Pines, a professional in the field of investigating cryptids and other oddities."

"What kind of cryptids did you meet sir?" a young man with thick glasses and horn-like hair asked. "Well that is a very good question young one." Ford answered. "Among the creatures I have researched are gnomes, unicorns, vampire bats, a squash with a human face & emotions, leprecorns, the Hide-Behind and cursed Egyptian super-termites."

As Ford continued speaking, Dipper & Kid decided to strike up a conversation. "So what did your father want my great uncle for?" Dipper asked. "I do not know, but I feel this requires some investigating. Want to join me after class?" Kid offered. "Are you kidding, I'd love to!"

"Hey, don't you want to train with me & Tsubaki on how to swordfight?" Black Star asked. "I would like to do that as well, but I think I'm gonna have trouble balancing it all." Dipper answered. "I could find a way to make another me to do one thing while I do another, but the last time I tried that went horribly wrong."

"And that's how I wound up who I am today." Ford concluded a speech. "Now then, are there any more questions?" he asked. "I got one." a somewhat familiar sounding voice said. "Yes, what do you have to say sir?"

"You ever tried giving up?" Suddenly the classroom turned monochrome as the voice began cackling. "I know that laugh." Ford angrily declared. "Come on out Bill, or keep hiding like a coward if you like!"

"Try turning around to your right Sixer." Ford did as Bill said and much to his horror, he found Marie taking off her eyepatch to reveal the eye of someone who would be possessed by the dream demon. "Did you really think you could escape me old chum? I thought we were best friends!" he exclaimed with a loud "OHOHOHOHO!"

"Quit laughing Bill! You've made my family suffer for far too long!" Ford screamed angrily grasping Marie's shoulders and shaking her back and forth, though Bill only laughed again. "Quit your fighting Stanford, even if you move yourself away from Gravity Falls I'll always be watching you!"

"No you won't, because I've got help!" Ford declared preparing to strangle Marie. "But how can you say that when you're already choking one of your "little helpers?" Toodle-oo!" Suddenly Bill disappeared leaving only the Death Scythe hailing from Oceania in his place, choking as the scientist tightly grasped her neck. "W-what are you d-doing?"

"Come back here you bastard and fight me! I could do this all day!" That was the last thing Stanford would say before he felt Stein punch him in the back. "Three-Fold!" the mad Meister exclaimed. "Gi, Go, Shoku!"

After being punched three times, Ford started bleeding from the mouth and lost his grip on Marie's neck before falling down in front of the stunned students. "Class dismissed." he coldly announced turning his screw and slinging Ford over his shoulder to carry him off, the classroom still deathly quiet.

Minutes later, Dipper and Mabel patiently waited in the school's dispensary for any news on their grunkle's condition. He laid there unconscious in the hospital bed, blood spilled from his mouth and his eyes shut. "What do you think prompted Ford to attack the eyepatch lady?" Mabel asked her brother, who stopped jotting down all he had learned in class to answer. "I don't know. But come to think of it, she does kinda remind me of Bill."

"What do you mean by that?" Mabel continued. "Well her primary colors are yellow & black and she has an eyepatch; but she looks in no way the type that would affiliate with him." Dipper analyzed. Just then, Maka opened the door to find the twins already in the room. "Hey guys, sorry about what happened with Ford."

"It's all right Maka, it's just that Bill hurt him so much that anything reminding him of the guy might trigger him now." Dipper said before Stein & Mira appeared as well with notes on his condition. "Good news children, your great-uncle shall be fine." the bandage-covered nurse announced. "Bad news, we may have diagnosed him with a mild case of PTSD."

"Tell us something we don't know! He's already suffered enough at the hands of Bill before, but what happened when Kishin Cipher has made things even worse for him!" Dipper exclaimed just as they heard moaning coming from Ford. "Hey, he's waking up!"

At the same time, Marie suddenly barged into the dispensary. "I am so sorry about what happened to Stanford! I didn't realize I would make him so mad, yet I don't know how!" she exclaimed before she suddenly tripped over and fell on Ford's body as he awakened. "Oh my back. What happened?" he groaned. "Kids?"

"Ford!" the twins cried in unison hugging their great-uncle. "Kids! Please tell me what happened." the genius said. "You were just standing there talking nerd stuff when you started rambling about Bill before strangling the eyepatch lady." Mabel explained. "Then Mr. Stein punched you so hard that you started bleeding from the mouth!"

"Wait, I did what?!" Ford exclaimed trying to comprehend what his great-niece had said. "Like I said, I'm truly sorry if I made you mad Stanford." Marie said getting up and dusting herself off. "And I assume you must be his great-nephew & niece?" she asked the twins. "Yes m'am! I'm Mabel and this is my brother Dipper!" Mabel introduced her and Dipper. "What's your name eyepatch lady?"

"My name's Marie Mjolnir. Very nice to meet you." Marie said shaking the kids' hands. "I have some apologies myself Marie. I am deeply regretful of what I've done earlier." Ford apologized. "Hopefully you can find a way to forgive me as well."

"Oh it's all right Ford." Marie replied before a crow suddenly flew by the window, squawking "Ahou! Ahou! Ahou!" much to the confusion of everyone in the room. "What the hell is that crow doing outside?" Ford wondered. "We have no idea either." Mira said. "It's been flying around the Academy for weeks, often appearing whenever someone would make a fool of themselves."

"Unrelated topic, but shouldn't you be assembling with Sid, the Scythes and Mifune to move out to Gravity Falls?" Stein wondered. "That's right, I just wanted to make some last arrangements before departing." Mira stated before walking out of the dispensary. "I shall see you all again soon."

With the nurse now leaving the room, the Pines then turned to meet Maka's gaze. "So what brings you here Maka? Well, other than my condition of course." Ford wondered. "I actually came to tell you about a big party Kid is throwing at his mansion to welcome you all to Death City." Maka announced.

"The whole school is invited actually, faculty included!"

"That sounds delightful Maka, I'll make a note of it." Stein commented turning to Ford. "And as for you, I think we should get you back home to recover. Which might mean you can't go to the party."

"Aw man, this could've been the perfect chance for you to find someone to love!" Mabel groaned in disappointment before she felt Marie tap her shoulder. "Did you say love? Are you like some expert matchmaker or something?" the Death Scythe asked. "All I ever wanted to do is find a man to love and we could retire together & have some beautiful children! I'm so desperate I might as well marry a toilet!"

"Well you could find a plumber to hook up with." Dipper snarked. "Preferably one who doesn't wear a tie and beats up evil turtles for a living."

"Mark my words Marie, I'm going to find you a man tonight or my name isn't Mabel Danielle Pines! And it is!" Mabel heroically declared. "Now then, gimme some info. For an possible dating site profile." she said leading Marie out the door. "Well I was born on June 8, 1984 in Oceania. I'm interested in surfing, Norse mythology, kangaroos, biking..."

"I can already tell they're going to be an unstoppable duo." Dipper declared as the two's voices grew fainter. "Speaking of teams, I have some business of my own to do." he said leaving the room as well. "Which one, training with Black Star or investigating with Kid?" Maka asked. "Both of them. We all decided to reach a compromise. See you tonight Maka!"

Soon Maka departed as well leaving Stein & Ford alone in the dispensary. "Okay, now that the children are out of the way, let's get to bringing you home." the stitched-up scientist declared helping Ford out of the hospital bed and leading him by the hand to the exit before Spirit suddenly appeared on the other side. "Hey Stein, you done with your business yet? I've been thinking we should go to Chupa-Cabra's later and-what are you doing?"

"He's simply helping me up, don't take it the wrong way Spirit!" Ford exclaimed nervously taking his hand away from Stein's. "And what is this Chupa-Cabra's place?" he wondered. "Oh it's just great Pines! I mean, you won't find any other place in Death City with babes and booze!" Spirit explained. "You gotta come with us!"

"Okay I'll bite." Ford gave in. "I think I might need a break from all this emotional suffering."

"Thanks for clearing up your schedule and helping us compromise on how to spend your time Dipper." Tsubaki said gratefully as they, along with Black Star, Excalibur, Kid and the Thompsons traversed the halls. "You're welcome Tsubaki. But is there anyone in this school that could tell us where to go from here?" Dipper wondered. "There actually is, and he should be coming up right now." Kid stated just as they came across a tall man with a chin-curtain beard, closed eyes and a rather large forehead drinking some coffee. "Hello again Joe."

"Oh hey kids, good to see you again. How's Oregon been?" the man asked them. "We actually brought something home from there!" Patty exclaimed bringing Dipper to his attention. "We'd like you to meet Dipper Pines!"

"What's up kid, name's Joe Buttakaki." Joe introduced himself shaking the boy's hand. "So what brings you here to Death City?" The Pines brother was silent for a moment before he answered, his voice firm with resolution. "I want to know about the Kishin Asura, and Lord Death's relationship with him."

Joe was silent and then he turned around. "Follow me." he simply stated leading the party away. "I knew the day when someone would ask about them would come. I just thought it would've been just Kid instead of you."

"Well that's the thing Joe, Asura called him his pesky little brother. What the hell is up with that?!" Black Star exclaimed as they moved from the academy interior to its underground hallways. "This was a secret Lord Death has sworn me to keep since I graduated from the academy." the DWMA's tech expert explained. "But word on the street is he's roped another person into his little inner circle of secret keepers."

"Another person?" Dipper wondered scratching his chin to deduce who this individual could be before Excalibur smacked him upside the head. "FOOL! It's most likely he's talking about your great-uncle." he declared to his new Meister, to his shock and exasperation. "Seriously?! We've already kept enough secrets from each other last summer, but this is getting ridiculous! I mean, what other stuff could we be in the dark about?!"

"I-I don't know, I'd prefer t-t-URP-to put the lime in the c-c-coconut and then eat the candle." Ford drunkenly remarked as he sat in Chupa-Cabra's with Spirit & Stein along with Blair, a pair of beautiful women and stacks upon stacks of beer mugs. "Very glad you're enjoying yourself Mr. Pines! Terribly sorry about what happened to your brother too." the first woman, named Risa, said comforting the elderly genius. "Yeah, I can see you're just utterly heartbroken by that." her partner Arisa added pouring Ford another drink. "Here, have another."

"Thank you ladies. You're such nice people." Ford thanked them putting his arms on their shoulders. "You're both absolute babes, but you Risa are just a beautiful butterfly." he slurred putting their faces uncomfortably close to one another and lightly gripping her chest. "I can definitely see that age has been insanely generous to you."

"Hey Ford, buddy?" Spirit interjected putting a hand on his shoulder. "I think all this booze is getting' to you. Listen, I get you're still super depressed over what happened to Stan, but you can't just waste your time just drinking your troubles away."

"You're one to talk scarlet, you'd rather waste your time here than be a good father!" Ford spitted at Spirit, much to his chagrin. "Dude, harsh!" he exclaimed in defense. "But I'm gettin' ahead of myself you're all the best people God ever crapped onto his dumpster fire of an asteroid! Drinks on me ladies and gents!" Ford shouted, leaving everyone stunned and concerned for him. "But how are you going to pay for all this?" Stein wondered. "You probably don't have that much money."

"OfcourseIdoKarloff!" Ford stuttered, his statement barely understandable as he fished some odd currency out of his pockets. "Lemme see I got zeni Beli woolongs Bison dollars bits bells gold rings gil munny rupees bolts lien schmeckles bottle caps all that jazz!"

"Wait, as in literal bottle caps? Where did you get these?" Stein wondered picking up a bottle cap. "Just another post-apocalyptic wasteland that I ran into across the multiverse somewhere!" Ford exclaimed spreading his arms wide. "There were giant roaches everywhere and I was accompanied by the cutest little dog who loved running into forcefields!" He then suddenly dropped to his knees with a crestfallen look on his face as he raised his arms up and screamed "DOGMEAT, NOOOOOO!"

"Seriously Fordsy, you need to chill out!" Blair sternly declared trying to stop Ford's drunken ranting, but was met with being lovingly gazed at by the great-uncle. "Can you hear my thoughts?" he began monologuing to himself. "My buddy from a distant star, I'm not sure I even know who you are. Look at me, like a kid out of school hanging out with a fool. A fool who I think is actually kinda cool."

"Are you okay there Stanford? You're slobbering all over the floor." Stein asked. "Why am I starting to drool?" Ford mused as saliva began pouring from his mouth before he finally fell over on his face, on the verge of a hangover. "We're trying to help you, you've had enough!" Spirit tried to pull him up but his hand was slapped aside. "I KNOW WHEN I'VE HAD ENOUGH YOU BEAUTIFUL PRINCESS!"

With that, Ford slipped into unconsciousness in a pool of his own drool and the stacks of mugs about to fall on him. He could barely make out the sounds of him being picked up off the floor and a door opening.

"Will this give us the answers we've been looking for?" Dipper asked as their group stood outside a large door deep within the academy's underground. "Yes indeed Dipper, welcome to the academy's Secret Vault." Kid declared pushing the door open to reveal a plethora of bizarre machinery lying around. "This is where we keep the various Demon Tools created by Eibon, whom as we discussed a long time ago during our rescue mission, created the Demon Weapons inspired by Excalibur."

"Whoa, Ford would've loved to see this place! Can't wait till I tell him at the party!" the younger boy gasped in amazement examining the various devices the sorcerer created. "There's just so many of them, I probably can't think straight over what they can do!"

"I know what'll help you think, some much needed sword training!" Black Star declared. "Once Tsubaki & I show you the ropes, you'll be an ace in no time! Though obviously not on par with yours truly."

"I'll give him the basics and you'll deal with some of the more complex stuff." Tsubaki suggested picking up a wooden bokken and taking a stance while Dipper prepared as well, summoning Excalibur to his side. "Now then Dipper, everything starts with your stance." she instructed her student as their weapons lightly tapped each other. "Keep your stance wide and your body lowered as you're moving forward."

"Balance is the key, right?" Dipper asked. "Correct." the shadow weapon answered. "Next is your right foot, then your left foot." she continued lecturing as they sparred. "Now go even faster. And as you're moving backwards, keep your eyes on me."

"Hey guys, I think I found something!" Patty shouted from afar, popping up with a large key in hand. "Doesn't this seem a little familiar to you guys?" she wondered turning it around to reveal that the teeth were in the shape of an E. "How can this be possible?! It disappeared along with him!" Kid exclaimed in shock taking the key out of his weapon's hands. "This has to be some kind of trap devised to keep intruders away from the Vault!"

"Nope, looks like the real deal to me." Joe guessed gazing at the key as well. "What are you guys talking about and why is that key so perplexing to you?" Dipper asked. "Let me take a look at it."

With the mysterious key handed to him, Dipper observed it looking for clues on what to do. "Maybe I should try rubbing it?" he suggested doing just that. "Sorry kid, but this doesn't look like any magic lamp." Liz snarked. "Or maybe it can open a door to the heart of all worlds!" Black Star chirped. "And it can also be used as a weapon to fight evil shadow creatures with no hearts!"

"Wait, I think I know one thing it can open." Kid announced looking towards a strange cube with ancient writing scribbled on it placed on a pedestal. "What is that thing?" Dipper wondered walking toward the cube. "That my friend is BREW, the legendary Demon Tool that can merge two things into one or create whatever the user desires." Excalibur answered. "If used incorrectly, it can bring about utter destruction as we know it."

Dipper then slowly inserted the key into BREW but unfortunately, nothing happened. "Is this going to be like in the movies and shows where it seems like something doesn't work but then after a few seconds it actually does?" Patty wondered and she was indeed proven right as BREW began to glow and flash wildly, causing debris from all around the room to fly around it. "Called it!"

"Everybody get down!" Dipper screamed before everyone ducked their heads down, all except for Excalibur, who only said "Fool." before BREW stopped shining and dust began forming, leading a large silhouette to appear.

When the dust settled, all that was left was a humanoid man whose appearance was concealed by a simple mask and extravagant robes. "What happened? Where am I?" the man wondered in a panic, unaware of his current surroundings. Just then he heard footsteps and found a young boy standing before him, looking up at his mask. "Excuse me sir, but are you Eibon?"

"Yes, indeed I am little one." Eibon answered quietly. "And you are?" he asked back, though the boy only replied by collapsing on the ground. "Dipper!" the Sorcerer heard a familiar voice. 'Dipper?' he thought. 'What an odd name.'

"Wake up Dipper, are you all right?!" Kid exclaimed trying to wake his younger companion up. "Why yes Mrs. Lincoln, and how was the play?" Dipper woozily asked barely putting his train of thought back on track. "What just happened?!"

"Hello again, old friend." Excalibur greeted Eibon. Although they couldn't see it through his mask, he was most definitely making the Excalibur face.

"Am I in the Secret Vault? How long was I out? Did we win?" Eibon asked still in the dark about current events. "Yes you are, about a few weeks and yes we did." Joe answered all three of the Sorcerer's questions. "That's quite a lot to take in. And who is this boy still?" Eibon continued. "Very few people are allowed in the vault!"

"My name's Dipper Pines Mr. Eibon." Dipper introduced himself shaking the giant's hand. "Very nice to meet you."

"Pleased to meet you too young man." Eibon replied accepting the child's handshake. "But still, what kind of name is Dipper?" he wondered. "Oh yeah, that's what most people call me because of this." Dipper replied taking off his hat and pushing aside some hair to reveal his birthmark. "My word, the Big Dipper! Now it makes more sense!"

"That would explain quite a bit. I just thought your folks hated you or something." Black Star added. "So tell me Dipper, what brings you to this vault?" Eibon asked. "I simply came because I want more info on Lord Death and Asura."

"I knew the day would come when someone would ask." the Sorcerer muttered. "Yes the rumors are indeed true, Asura is Death's son." he stated. "Which would make Kid here..."

"My-my brother." the young Death God finally realized. "How has Father kept this from me for centuries?!" he screamed, desperate for more answers. "He simply didn't want you to feel betrayed!" Eibon stated. "I am sorry we couldn't tell you all this time, not just me and your dad."

"Wait, what do you mean?" Black Star wondered. "It wasn't just me that held his secret. All his Death Scythes were in on it as well, and Excalibur too." Eibon revealed, causing everyone to look at the Holy Sword in annoyance. "What, I suppose you're going to get mad at me for keeping quiet as well?"

"What else is he keeping from us? I suppose something related to a certain triangle." Dipper asked, writing in his journal. "I presume you've encountered Bill Cipher as well. As have Death and I." Eibon continued preparing to reminisce on that time. "He came to us claiming that he can help him purge the world of evil, but of course it was all a lie."

"Aw come on Death, we can still work things out! Honest!" Bill Cipher urged the Shinigami as they fought in the Nightmare Realm. "Silence you three-sided scum, or I'll dip you in magma and eat you alive!" Death threatened in a much more menacing voice glaring at the demon through his realistic mask. "You thought your wily words could swindle me, but I shall be tricked no longer!"

"I know you're in there somewhere best buddy! The four of us actually made a good team." Bill stated with a chortle. "You, me, Eibon and Arachne, we would've been unstoppable together! But NOOOO, that little tattletale of a Holy Sword just had to rat me out!"

"It was for the greater good!" Death shouted before he felt his cloak being incinerated by Bill's azure flames. "AAAAAGGGGHHHHH!"

As the Shinigami screamed in pain, Bill pulled out a stopwatch counting down how many seconds it took for his anguished crying to stop. "Wow, 42 seconds! That's gotta be a new record!" he commented applauding as the Death God's cloak regenerated, Death himself looking more furious than ever. "Death Claw!" he screamed summoning four black tendrils bearing his face to grab Bill by the arms and dragging them towards each other, allowing Death to deal the final blow. "REAPER CHOP!"

With a mighty slap, Bill shouted in pain clutching his eye. "You damn idiot, that was one of my weaknesses!" the demon screamed. "All right, you win you idiot!" he added finally surrendering. "It's about time you golden beast. Now leave this realm and never return, unless you want me to tear you to shreds." Death snarled menacingly sticking his bony hand toward him. "AM, I, CLEAR?!"

"Oh you may have won this time bonehead, but I'm not done with your puny world yet!" Bill cautioned him casting him out of the Nightmare Realm. "And when that day comes, I won't be the only one you'll be worrying about. Until then, I'll be watching you! I'LL BE WATCHING YOU!"

"So you and Lord Death actually worked together with Bill at some point? Gee that totally doesn't sound familiar!" Black Star exclaimed rolling his eyes. "Hey speaking of which, I wonder how Ford is doing?" Dipper wondered before his phone started ringing. "Well speak of the devil." he muttered picking it up. "Go for Dipper!"

"Who is it? And what is that strange contraption you're holding?" Eibon asked as the boy hung up. "It's Mabel sir, something's wrong with Ford!" Dipper exclaimed. "Ford? My word, we've been down here so long I've lost track of time!" Kid fretted exiting the Secret Vault. "We need to get ready for tonight!"

"Aw geez you're right! C'mon Tsubaki, let's get cracking!" Black Star shouted, the two racing ahead of them. "A party, you're having a party? Can I come!?" Eibon asked getting excited. "As much as I hate to say this, but it's best that you stay down here for now." Joe answered. "Hopefully we can meet each other again!"

When the door finally closed leaving Eibon all by himself in the vault, he took a moment to look around, examining all the various Demon Tools he created being stored there. Stepping toward a large machine with a clockwork key inside it, he opened it and found a small plaque with his and Death's signatures on it. "Why must there be so many secrets?"

By the time Ford began regaining some form of thought, everything around him was still incredibly blurry. It felt like he was submerged in some nice-smelling liquid and something round & soft was right in front of him. He could also hear a female singing about pumpkins and magic.

"N-no wire h-hangers, ever." he slurred finally coming to. Slowly opening his eyes, he found himself in a bathtub with Waddles right in front of him. "Waddles? What are you doing here? Where am I?"

"Oh goody, you're finally awake!" a familiar cadence exclaimed. With a rub of his eyes, Blair sat right before him in the tub completely nude. "Goodness gravy!" Ford screamed stumbling out of the tub before unfortunately falling on his face, causing his nose to bleed. "I have asked this once, I've asked this a thousand times! Is shame just nowhere to be found in your dictionary?!"

Waddles oinked twice turning his head in amusement. "Oh don't you start!" Ford scolded the swine. "Look at me, I'm a mess!" he exclaimed. "Then what state were you in earlier?" the Monster Cat snarked, making the scientist realize just what he had become. Gazing deeply into the bathroom mirror, staring back at him was a man completely broken by loss, desperate to relieve himself of his grief even though it was completely fruitless.

"Stanford Filbrick Pines, what happened to you?" he groaned in regret before he pulled a drenched photo of him and Stanley as children posing with their shipwreck the Stan O' War. It wasn't long before all those times where he had begged to relieve himself of the pain, first losing his brother, then making a scene in front of an entire class and finally falling into a hangover, came crashing down and he finally broke down in tears. "Why me?! Just why?!"

"Oh don't cry Forddy." Blair said getting out of the tub to comfort him. "And yes, I am wearing a bathrobe this time. Now come on, let's get you some coffee."

One towel over the scientist's head and a cup of coffee in his hand later, Ford sat down on the couch utterly miserable while the Monster Cat gently massaged his back. "Thank you very much Blair, but I feel it's pretty much hopeless for me. My family's torn apart and Kishin Cipher is running amok back in Gravity Falls." he sighed deeply. "Hey I've always wanted to know, what's your story? Well, other than being a promiscuous cat with magic powers that happens to resemble a witch."

"I wasn't able to tell anyone about it my entire time in Death City, but my past isn't all sunshine and rainbows." Blair answered lying down and resting her legs on his lap. "I did originate from the Witches' Realm, but their destruction loving ways are seriously boring. I just love ditching them and hanging out in Death City, which is where I first met Maka & Soul."

"Interesting. Could you perhaps further elaborate on Witches?" Ford wondered beginning to show a bit of his old self pulling out a notepad to jot down on. "Well, they're like super powerful when it comes to magic and also can live a really long time!" Blair explained. "There are also maybe a few wandering around in Death City keeping themselves hidden using Soul Protect, which they can use to disguise their souls as normal humans."

"Disguising their souls. Gonna have to look further into that." Ford mumbled writing down notes. "Speaking of which, where did the kids run off too? I'm sure they couldn't have gone far." he wondered. "Oh yeah, they went to a party at Kid's place after coming back here to check up on you." the cat answered, to Ford's alarm. "My goodness, the party! I should best get ready! Blair, is there anything around here I can wear?"

Just then, Waddles oinked as he waddled in, wearing a small hand towel on his head as he pointed to Soul's room. "Thank you oh so much Waddles. And I should really dry out my clothes too."

Stepping into Soul's empty bedroom and closing the door behind him, Ford came out moments later in a simple suit with a black jacket with matching shoes, tie & pants and white undershirt. When he turned around to examine himself in the mirror, Blair's slender hands grasped his shoulders. Turning around, the author found the cat dressed up for a night on the town herself in a purple dress with a single slit on the side showing some leg and her hair in a ponytail. Waddles on the other hand wore a tiny bowler hat and a bowtie.

"I suppose you're coming along as well?" Ford asked. "Of course I am, just to keep you grounded. And Waddles is coming too!" Blair answered, and Waddles added with an oink. "That'd be delightful. Now let's get moving!" While opening the door, Ford felt Blair start holding his hand and he held hers with a grin, the three of them finally walking out together.

"I can't believe it, we haven't found you a man all day!" Mabel exclaimed as she and Marie helped themselves to some punch at the buffet table at Kid's party. "And to add insult to the coffin, no hits on your dating profile yet!"

"I know right? At this rate I might as well marry a toilet!" Marie replied. "But which kind would take me, cause I'm leaning toward a porta-potty. At least we can go anywhere together!" Just then Dipper walked up to the buffet table. "What was that about toilets?" he asked with a nervous look. "Oh nothing broseph, we're just talking about Ms. Marie's love life."

"Hey everybody, I got some more mineral water for you if you're thirsty!" a blonde young man with bright blue eyes exclaimed racing into the main hall with platters of wine glasses filled with water. "Hey thanks Hiro, I was getting thirsty!" Marie thanked the boy taking a glass. "And how are those lambchops with applesauce coming along?"

"Doing good, I'll bring them out in a sec!" Hiro replied before he began groaning to himself. "If only I had my own weapon that would make people stop pushing me around. Well other than Excalibur anyway." he muttered. "What's his problem?" Dipper wondered beginning to snack on some hors d'oeuvres. "TL;DR, he's a total wimp that people treat as their servant because he doesn't have a weapon." Mabel answered. "But where can we find a good one for him?"

"Maybe he'd match up well with Mai Thi Hoang from the NOT class over there. She's real nice and could probably treat him well." the Death Scythe suggested pointing to a young Vietnamese girl with red-framed glasses making small talk with Gideon. The two of them then put on their own glasses before menacingly tenting their fingers and declaring "Jackpot." while their lenses shined.

"For the last time Fiddleford, stop pigging out on all that spaghetti! Were you raised on a farm or something?!" Kid complained to McGucket. "As a matter of fact Stripes, I am!" the genius hillbilly replied. "And this ain't spaghetti, it's linguini!"

Kid only responded by briefly gazing at the plate before he snatched it out of Fiddleford's hands and chucked it at the wall. "Now it's garbage." he coldly declared just as he realized the mess he made and hastily cleaned it up, desperate to keep the symmetry of his home intact. "Whew, close call!"

Suddenly there was a knock on the door. "Oh, that must be Ford! Wonder what took him so long?" Maka said opening the doors to find not only Stanford, but also Blair & Waddles as well. "Hello there miss, sorry I took so long." the author sheepishly said stepping inside. "And I've also brought a few plus-ones."

"Oh my gosh, you all look amazing! And Waddles is dressed like a little man out for a night on the town too!" Mabel squealed racing towards the three of them. Maka on the other hand couldn't help but find Ford's suit familiar. "That's the same outfit Soul wore to the Anniversary Eve celebration."

"Oh, I didn't realize! If it's okay with you, I could go back and find a different suit." Ford stated before Maka stopped him. "It's fine Mr. Pines. It's fine." she sighed, still hurting over losing Soul. "Aw don't feel so blue Maka, mama Blair can make you feel all better!" Blair assured the young Meister. "Thank you Blair. I can't believe I just said that."

"Yo old man, how are you recovering?!" Black Star exclaimed rushing up to Ford. "I'm doing fine Black Star. And please don't call me old man!" Stanford said. "Okay then old man." the young ninja replied. "Good grief."

"Black Star, Mabel, can I pull you two aside for a bit?" Dipper asked them. "I want to talk with Ford and I don't want anyone to notice us." he said. "Oh, you mean that stuff about Asura?" Black Star said. "Wait, what's this about Asura?" Mabel wondered. "We'll explain later. Right now, I'm gonna need you to provide a distraction." her brother ordered. "Any ideas?"

"Ooh, I got one!" Mabel chirped. "Why don't we get the orchestra to play a new song, one that's less boring?" she suggested. "Okay, which one?" Dipper wondered to which she replied by pulling out a music sheet, making the boy facepalm. "Seriously, that one? That is just so 2004!"

"Oh man, I love this song!" Black Star exclaimed. "And yes, I know it's hilarious that I, a super manly man, adore a song written by a boy band loved by young girls at the time." he added. "Now what are you waiting for, get them to play it!"

Mabel stepped up to the orchestra with the sheet in hand and shoved the piece they were playing aside in favor of hers. "Hey, can you play this instead?" she asked. After some careful consideration, the orchestra shrugged and played the new song, which Mabel & Black Star began singing along to. "Quit playing games with my head! I'm a sport but I'm not a toy," they harmonized to the high-class remix of their song. "Let's not analyze what I just said! I don't want to be a complex boy!"

Faster than anyone could notice, they all started dancing before Patty leaped onstage with the two and joined in. "I can't tell if you're serious when you are so delirious! I'm just playing it baby, is that a yes, no or maybe?! YES!"

As the trio continued, Ford sighed sitting by the punchbowl. "I swear, youth is wasted on the young." he mused taking a sip. "Indeed, look at them so young and naïve." Azusa Yumi added standing next to him. "And yet sometimes I feel the adults are guilty of this as well, like your hobo friend for example." She then pointed to McGucket pigging out on finger sandwiches while Marie desperately tried to get Hiro & Mai to chat. "He's just too busy absorbing the entire buffet table."

"Now for your information Yumi, my friend is a scientific genius! He helped me build my portal and also constructed various machines that he mostly used to wreak havoc whenever someone wronged him!" Ford hotly argued. "And what do you have to accomplish, aside from being a Death Scythe?!"

"I actually helped defeat Asura for your information sideburns!" Azusa shouted back. "How so, did Death find a way to weaponize your bitc-" Ford prepared to insult right back at her before Dipper pulled on his leg. "Excuse me for a moment, great-nephew."

The two stepped into another room far from the festivities when Ford finally decided to ask what was up. "So what did you pull me aside for?" he wondered. "It's about Asura." Dipper sternly answered crossing his arms and narrowing his eyes. "Is it true that you've been told about his relationship with Lord Death & Kid yet didn't tell anyone else about it?!"

"Look, Death has sworn me to keep this secret; and I'm not the only one either!" Ford exclaimed. "Tons of people were in on it, Stein, Spirit, Sid, the other Death Scythes, even Excalibur!" he added. "The last one I know about, but seriously! Remember the last time someone kept a secret from the rest of their family? The entire universe was nearly destroyed!" the boy argued. "Twice even, all because Stan made the stupid decision of ruining your science project!"

"I'm not even sure Stanley was the one who broke it! He said he fixed it yet when I presented it, it was an utter mess!" Ford yelled. "And speaking of family, you don't have to bring Stan into this especially after we just lost him yesterday!"

"Gee, this is totally sounding familiar!" Dipper screamed. "Someone keeps a dark secret from their family which tears them all apart!" Suddenly they heard a knocking on the door before it slightly creaked open. "Mabel, I can see you from the other side. Come on in."

"You too Blair." Ford added and Blair stepped into the room carrying an exhausted Mabel in her arms. "I'm sorry Dipper, I couldn't keep singing forever!" she panted before being dropped on the floor. "But silver lining, everybody loved it when I sang with Black Star and Patty."

"You heard everything, didn't you?" Dipper asked folding his arms. "Yeah pretty much! And I gotta say, what a twist!" Blair answered brightly. "I mean, the whole 'villain is secretly related to the hero' thing has been done everywhere, yet I still didn't see it coming!"

"So was that the reason why you told me to sing? You could've easily done without it." Mabel asked. "I know sis, but that still was a good distraction." Dipper replied spreading out his arms. "Awkward sibling hug?"

"Awkward sibling hug." Mabel accepted and they hugged before saying "Pat pat!" in unison. "Dipper, I am truly sorry about not telling you about Death and Asura beforehand." Ford apologized getting down on a knee. "Let's promise that there be no more secrets within our family, no ifs ands or buts!"

"No ifs ands or buts indeed!" Dipper answered. "Now come on guys, the party's still going on!" he shouted walking back to the shindig. Ford and Blair soon followed behind, but not Mabel as she gazed at the wall. "Aren't you coming back with us Mabel?"

"I'll be with you in a bit." Mabel answered not even turning to her brother. She continued staring at the wall in front of her, still conflicted on whether her own secret should get out. On one hand, she'd finally get some closure but on the other, her family would be furious for her playing an important part in the beginning of a certain event.

"I will tell them, no matter what." Mabel solemnly declared, her fists clenched in determination before she turned around and returned to the party, adamant on her decision.

And that's it for this chapter! Now, I was originally going to end off on a fight between Dipper, Mabel & Wendy against Ox, Kim & Kilik, but then I decided to just reduce it to a scene where Ox challenges the three of them because the chapter was packed enough already until I finally decided to save it for next time. Speaking of which, next time Mabel gets stuck in the feels wringer as Kishin Cipher plots to drive the Pines apart for his own misdeeds. But just what does he have planned for her, and who knew emotionally torturing your favorite characters was so much fun?!

[ahiddenpath]

Digimon Adventure Tri Stage Play Reaction

Guys, this is not an analysis: this is my feels and obnoxious comments while viewing the stage play.  My initial goal was to use these notes to make an analysis, but they’re too funny/stupid/wow to hide from the world.  I typed these notes in real time, stopping the play whenever I had a thought.  It’s the closest I can get to having you watch me watch the stage play without using videos.  I will write an actual meaningful post soon, but for now, have a confused and jumpy/unpolished blob of feels.

The other thing I want to say is that I didn’t edit this after I wrote it, except for surface editing (grammar, spelling) and clarifications (mostly adding more names).  So if I formed an impression at some point, that’s what I really thought in that moment; I didn’t go back and change it.

That said: this will completely and totally spoil the stage play.  SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS!  Read on below the cut (if you dare; it’s almost 4K words long and full of images).

Hidden’s Digimon Adventure Tri Stage Play Reaction

I am immediately not buying that Mimi wouldn't want to camp in the bungalow.  Isn't this the kid that went to Tokyo Tower instead of patrolling Tokyo because the tower has AC?  I guarantee she'd whine an hour in about wanting the bungalow, but wouldn't allow Koushiro to point out that she made this choice for all of them x__x

 Did Mimi just... just throw the laptop?  How bratty can you get?  I... wow, I really hope they don’t treat my Mimi so poorly the whole play.

From Sora's speech, I can see that nostalgia will be a major theme here, which, to be fair, is appropriate, lol!  Nostalgia is pretty much why we’re here.

TAICHI! It’s so good to see you get your big bro on again, lol???  Hikari:  "I'm not a kid who needs to wait for you to walk home with me."

 Taichi: "What?  Why not?  WHAT'S WRONG?!  CONFIDE IN ME!"  He’s so aggressive and clumsy about it, lol??

Taichi:  "WHO ARE YOU CALLING A STUBBORN BLOCKHEAD."

Jyou, amiably: "You, of course! Wait-"  I'm like 15 minutes in and I have already decided that Jyou is my favorite (not surprising lol).

Jyou:  "YOU ARE IN DANGER, TAICHI.  I HAVE NEVER SEEN YOU STUDY."  Oh lord, Jyou is bashing Taichi with the stone of foreboding. Is Jyou okay?  Is he quite sane?  He isn't, is he.  Do you see that gleam in his eye?  No, no. He is gone and gone indeed.  Jyou’s actor is A+++

Annnnnnd oh hey, it's Yamyams doin' jamjams!  I can dig that bass, is he actually playing?  Oh hey, he's gonna sing for real, he's-  Oh my god, stop!  ABORT! He's terrible, hahahaha?!?!?!  IT BURRRRNSSS!!!  

OH MY GOD HIS BAND HATES THE BAND NAME AND THEY'RE SPEAKING TO HIM IN FRENCH WHAT IS THIS

Wait wow what is this weird ass vibe between the bros?  Teeks is accusing Yams of not visiting...  Did Yamato have that habit to start with?  Hmm...

So Takeru says, "I don't want to see us go our different ways."  I've mentioned it over and over, but this feeling is so important to me.  It's something I want to write an entire fic around.  On the one hand, it's such an easy topic, given the subject material. On the other, it's where my brain keeps going.  So... Let's see what happens!

Also:  Takeru:  "Stay hidden, Patamon!" *puts Patamon on his head and skips offstage* Takeru, sigh...

OH SHIT IT'S ETEMON, saying Taichiiiiihehehehe like a creep ass creeper.  He done got beef, too.

Annnnd we cut to everyone reacting because Mimi has no supplies (did you all not bring any?). What I like here, though, is that Jyou can at least talk to her without getting shut down.  Poor Kou-chan -__-

Koushiro: "We're amateurs, is there anything we should watch out for?"  OH I DUNNO, MAYBE ETEMON IN A HAT AND A VEST god damn I know this is supposed to be funny, but they all look like idiots- 

Koushiro: "That old man had a feminine way of speaking"  Says the dude being portrayed by a male actor FOR THE FIRST TIME-

Koushiro: "Taichi-san, you're the closest thing to a caveman we have-"  Ah, bless.

(At this point, my husband is pointing out while playing Destiny that the puppeteers do really good digimon voices, and I'm explaining that the digimon voices are pre-recorded, lol).

ANNNNND Mimi is whining for supplies that she forbade people to bring.  I am shocked.

Jyou is talking about how he wants to help digimon by being a doctor, by saving and protecting, and my heart is growing three sizes.  Best Chosen, y'all.

But oof, the atmosphere got so heavy...  Why do these kids refuse to talk about what they want to do???  Jyou remains refreshing.  Also, I'm just noticing how Koushiro turns his entire body around every single time towards whoever is talking?  He leans in, too.  It's both cute and unexpected (I would expect much more reserved body language, but I get that this is a play and that's what you do).

HAH!  Only Jyou can see the shooting star because he's the only one with his shit together!  I love that, lol!  (Also, is that really Tailmon's voice actress?  Hmm...)

NO, ETEMON HAS KOU-CHAN, BAD TOUCH, BAD TOUCH although really it's painful that we're still pretending they can't recognize Etemon.

Koushiro can't read the room...  Well, at least that's familiar, lol!

(At this point, my husband is asking what I think, and I'm stuttering over how annoyed I am at the ‘not-recognizing-Etemon’ gag.  My husband is laughing at me and saying I'm at a loss for words. Thanks, love.)

HOLY SHIT did Hikari and Mimi just use the tired "scary stories" trope to bring up the Dark Ocean? I'll give 'em points for that.  I AM INTRIGUED, let's go!!!  Oh.  Oh, they broke it off.  They're not doing anything with it.  That's... sigh.  Thanks, guys. (Caterpillar Sleeping Bag Mimi is cute AF tho).

Hmm, right now I'm thinking that Mimi's actress is so lovely and so lively and really feels like Mimi, but...  I also can't stand how they wrote her so far.  Throwing Koushiro's computer, talking over him, not allowing him to point out when she's contradicting herself, immediately requesting the supplies she forbade people to bring...  This stuff annoyed me in Adventure, but she was 10 and in a situation I would have strongly struggled to handle.  But now she's literally...  Making problems for everyone...  For nostalgia's sake...  At age 16? I'm so torn, lol, because the acting is so good but ahhhhh...  Let's see how this develops...

Hmm hmm, I'm listening to Sora talk about how she doesn't wanna grow up, either... Darling, you're already quite grown up, lol!  Lovely lady. I love how the digimon puppeteers echo their puppets, I can't get enough of watching Agumon's puppet and performer while Sora speaks.  They really did a great job!

I think I'm about an hour into this, maybe a little less?  45 minutes?  So far all that's really happened is that we've established that the characters want to be together as Chosen Children, and that with the exception of Jyou, they aren't emotionally or mentally prepared to seriously think of a future beyond that.  I'll be the first to say that this a compelling and interesting topic, and it's something I've wondered about for them, but...  Shouldn't... more things... have happened by now?  Hmm...  I understood that this would be an issue from Sora's very first bit of dialogue.  No one in the audience needs this much expansion and repetition, particularly with so few new ideas and so little momentum so far.  Tri is intended as a love letter for fans of Adventure, yes?  Mostly adult fans?  We don’t need this much repetition to understand, we truly don’t...

Ah!  Now Yamato is talking about Jyou and how to become an adult, finally dropping some new ideas in.  Love ya, Yams.  And ahh, man, Taichi is just... screaming all of his lines?  The actor is so sweet and cute, but the delivery...  I'm pretty sure it's supposed to reflect that Taichi is putting up fronts like nobody's bidness, though.  Yamato ain't buyin' it (Yamato is Almost Best).  I really want him to grunt, "Tell the truth or shut up." XD XD  GRUNT GRUNT.

 Augh, god, I can't take this tho?  Literally EVERY TIME someone tries to say something that will move the plot forward or inject some vulnerability into this play (except for Papa Jyou), they change the subject.  I'm about halfway through now and this has to be at least the 10th time we've been blocked from useful information and deeper thoughts with this method.  Tri suffers from this same issue, though...  Their plot is such that they can’t sustain tension if issues are faced in a natural way, so they CHANGE THE SUBJECT or DROP A LEAD or IGNORE A LEAD, etc, etc.  Here it's mostly saying, "Well what about you?" or screaming someone else's name, which...  Subtle???  Ah, Taichi's latest method of not saying anything is to ask Yamato to play his harmonica...  Oh my god, he's playing Walk on the Edge!  Okay, okay, you got me, stage play.  Hahaha, I remember Yams being better at playing a harmonica, tho!!!!  (I keep picking on this poor dude who is asked to do all of the awesome shit Yams can do, sorry my dude).

Taichi:  Should we sleep?

Yamato:  Let's talk some more.

Taichi: (shit!  fuck!  He remembered I'm dodging-)  YES BECAUSE HE ISN'T AN IDIOT EXCEPT WHEN ETEMON IS ONSTAGE OMG SOMEONE HELP ME-

Ahhh, and they fade out...  With no forward movement.  THANKS.  I mean we established mood, touched on Taichi/Yamato’s relationship, and set up the problems that will be address later (I assume), but...  It’s so drawn out...  

And now Koushiro is drawing on the ground with a stick, bless you, are you trying to compute something? Sigh...  Ah, bless, Tentomon is intervening, haha! 

But...  As right as Ten-chan is, he's also... Wrong? XD  DON'T TELL YOUR FORWARD MOVEMENT MACHINE TO POWER DOWN!!!  Annnnd yes!  We're an hour in and SOMETHING IS HAPPENING!  I am so ready for something to happen. (Tony: "Can we handle the stimulation, though?")

Oh god, the kids freaking out over their partners acting weird, Gabumon's stage hand collapsing... God, right in the feels, I'm almost mad about how easy it is to get an emotional response this way, lol!  We just love our babies too much, lol!

Wow, Yamato lost it at Kou-chan...  You know, we think of Taichi as carrying a lot of pressure (and rightfully so), but Koushiro carries just as much, as we saw in Kokuhaku.  He's not magic, Yams, he needs his tools, and he doesn't have 'em. Related:  Although I don't much care for how it happened, I definitely would love to read/write/see a story where Koushiro has no computer and has to adapt, though.  I'd also love to see one where a new tech wizard appears and he questions his role, but that's a whole' nother thing.

EWW OH MY GOD DON'T UNDRESS ETEMON MIMI WHAT THE HELL, bleeeeehhhhhhh...  Oh god, he thought his outfit was obvious...  Well, you see Etemon, somewhere in the last 6 years, the kids completely lost their ability to read situations x__x  (I get that this is a joke, I really do?  But???)

 Oh huh, so they're claiming Etemon wandered the Dark Ocean for 100 years?  Didn't he...  Come back in Adventure as MetalEtemon?  Is he referencing his second defeat?  ?????

OH GOD POWER RANGER ETEMON WHAT IS HAPPENING.  Haha it's kind of cute that he's like, "Eh I don't know these two (Hikari and Tailmon).  I don't think Metaletemon saw them?  But honestly I don't remember.  I think he was around Jyou and Mimi mostly?

Wait shit are we seriously doing the actual conflict part WITHOUT JYOU AND GOMAMON?  I am so mad right now.  I kind of feel like they'll burst in at some point???  I hope...

...Etemon has a song and dance number.  I am rolling on the floor in pain with the Chosen.  I'm doing it, guruguru mawaru-  No, NO, YOU PUT TAICHI DOWN-  Goddamit how many bad touch jokes do I have to make-

 OH THANK GOD, is Jyou coming back?  THANK YOU DIGI JESUS!  (Tony: "Wait is your favorite back? Did he leave?  It sounded like he wandered off and now he's wandering back in again."

Gomamon: "YOU'RE BEING GROSS JYOU" honey, oh child, you ain't seen nothing yet.  Oh bless him, he's so happy, can we just watch Jyou bounce around in joy please and no more singing power ranger monkeys?  I take back my complaints about nothing happening, haaaaaaaaaaaalp me Senpaaaaaaaaaiiiiiiiiiiii

Oh lord Etemon's back WHELP.  Oh shit, oh shit that Obon joke, THAT'S THE BEST JOKE IN THIS PLAY, isn’t it?  We can't beat that.  Should I... leave?

Taichi, in Etemon's gross ass digital Wonder Land:  "What's wrong, Hikari?"  WHAT'S WRONG?!  WHAT COULD POSSIBLY BE-

(My husband has informed me that I'm growling.  He tells me that, when we were watching Gravity Falls and Mabel tries to tempt Dipper and the others to stay in the perfect imaginary world Bill made for her, I said, "What is she, Satan?  Tempting them to stay here in comfort instead of facing danger to save everyone?"  This is a similar scenario, and it's one of the few things I didn't like about Gravity Falls and OH NO, TAICHI IS THE MABEL OF THIS SITUATION, HELP!!!!  Oh thank goodness, Taichi's done with this too, whew, okay, okay, breathe, stop growling).

Oh God, the Agumon puppet looks dead without the puppeteer, that's actually really awful? These puppets are amazing, guys.  I cannot say enough good stuff about the execution with these puppets.

Hmm, Taichi just begged for mercy, and Etemon is unimpressed...  Reminds me of the fandom after Saikai.  I wonder where they'll take this...

HOLY SHIT Taichi is losing his shit!  I won't say that all of that stammering and dodging earlier is accounted for here, since most of the characters did it to some degree, but it's nice to see the payoff within the same piece (instead of waiting months for the next Tri film and forming your own conclusions in that time period).  I'm actually happy to see a screaming breakdown like this...

Man Koushiro speaks SO QUICKLY, dude, slow it down!!!  Ahhh, he says that we're granted whatever we want here, so Etemon is probably trying to trick us by having us hear Jyou.  SOMEONE IS THINKING USING THEIR BRAINSSS I CAN'T BELIEVE IT!!!!

JYOU IS HEREEEE TO SAVE THE DAAAAAAYYY THE NEW DIGI JESUS, JYOUUUUUU!!!  (And while I 100% agree that you should be cautious, Kou-chan, c'mon, he arrived saying that you made his phone go off on the train and it made him feel awkward, that's pretty much proof that it's Jyou, lol!).  OH AND NOW KOU AND YAMS ARE ROASTING JYOU, classic.

Koushiro finally takes a stab directly at the heart of this...  It's not even about being children and avoiding adulthood; it's about not wanting to leave August 1st.  I realize exposition is Kou's job, but I didn't expect him to be the one to lay it out after all of this dodging.  I’ll be honest, I’m so pleased with Koushiro in this stage play so far?  I love how he moves, I love how quickly he speaks, I love that he’s able to come out and say this.  I wasn’t into the way the play used him spouting off numbers to indicate intelligence, but that’s a nitpick compared to the ground they gave Koushiro here.  

JYOU.  JYOU.  EVEN IF YOU DON'T BELIEVE IN YOURSELF, KOUSHIRO, I BELIEVE IN YOU.  He continues to be THE BEST, I am in awe, I bow before Jyou.

OH MAN is Jyou gonna work his awkward magic on Yams?  Where's my freakin' popcorn.  Oh, well, hell.  Yama said he... doesn't wanna talk.  *rubs forehead*  Great. Entertaining.  THIS IS FUN I AM HAVING FUN *curls up and cries*

Okay so now Taichi is freaking out and Koushiro is trying to talk to him (roughly 70% of this stage play is someone trying and failing to talk to someone else).  But I really like what Taichi says here- "I have nothing to hesitate about." We all know this isn't true; Taichi is hesitating all over the place right now.  Let's see where this goes!  (Please let it go somewhere this time, lord above).  WAIT- WAIT-  ARE YOU SHOWING ME KOUSHIRO POINTING FINGERS AT TAICHI'S BULLSHIT AND SAYING "I'VE BEEN BY YOUR SIDE FOR SIX YEARS!!" AND THEN CUTTING AWAY?!?!??!?!?!?!?  RAAAAAAAHHHH is this an aneurysm?  I think this is what an aneurysm feels like.  You can't drop lines that good and then CUT AWAY FROM IT GOOD LORD IN HEAVEN-

Sigh, tsk, groan. Hikari, Teeks.  Whacho got for me?  Whoa, I swear Takeru has been a second away from sobbing ever since Etemon revealed himself.  You... you okay, buddy?  Can I, uh, get you anything?  I love how much Hikari has her shit together in contrast.  Oh, and Takeru is about to say something usefu- ohhh, another cut. God, I have a headache.

Hmm, Sora and Meems are cracking, too...  Sora says, "It was simpler when I was everyone's mom.  It's not like me to decide on someone or something."  I really need to hear Mulan's Reflections in the background right now...

Mimi saying "I want to do SO many things!" is refreshing my soul.  I know she's one of the most shippable Chosen, but honestly, if not for the fact that she has a kid that is clearly biologically hers, I would assume that she's too busy doing EVERYTHING to have a family.  My headache recedes just a touch.

Hmm...  I actually really like what Sulky (Yams) is trying to say here.  "I don't want to be with everyone because I'm Chosen.  I want to be with Gabumon because he's my friend," basically.  Part of me sides with Jyou- dude we all get that, it's not a shameful secret- but another part of me...  Deeply appreciates that Yams can separate his duty as a Chosen from his bond with his digimon.  Gabumon is his best friend, his number one.  It doesn't matter if Gabumon can't fight, if Yamato can never digivolve him again. It doesn't even matter that he's a digimon.  It just matters that they're friends, and that they be together somehow, which may seem a more tenuous position by the day.  ...Now I'm sad.  Well played, stage play.  This moment is wonderful.

...Annnnnnd now Yamato is overacting to hell, and I'm laughing instead of thinking and feeling, was that supposed to happen?  Sigh. I still don't understand why he has to be SO SECRETIVE about it, but I mean...  That's our Yams??? 

And now we're back to Kou and Taichi, and they're pulling at each other's throats, as they will, and honestly this is the only "NOW KISS" moment for me, but where was I-

In all seriousness, I really like that the person to finally, FINALLY get the truth from Taichi is Koushiro.  That's how it often was in Adventure too, yes?  But I almost feel like Taichi's breakdown here is a reflection of what fans said in Saikai.  Taichi in Adventure always took action (although he grew so much during Adventure, I'd argue the version of himself he's referencing now wasn't there by the end of Adventure?). He can't fight in Saikai because he's concerned about hurting people/property/the tenuous relationship between humans and digimon.  He can't take action...  But the ability to see that is an indication of growth, not regression.  Will he understand that here?  

Ok god, Agu-chan is dropping some truth bombs...  And the way he and his puppeteer crawl...  I swear these goddamm puppets will be the death of me.

Agu-chan, can you do me a solid and STAMP THIS ALL OVER EVERY SINGLE ONE OF THESE KIDS PLEASE AND THANK YOU?!

HOLY SHIT IS THAT A METALGRAYMON PUPPET?!  THEY HAD THAT SHIT ALL ALONG AND THEY BRING IT OUT WITH 20 MINUTES LEFT?!  WHAT WOT WOOOOT?!??!  I cannot believe I'm seeing this.  And I love how heavy and cumbersome the huge puppet feels.  Like, I always felt like Metalgreymon would be huge and slow, right?

Etemon, I was done with your shit a LONG time ago...

WAIT he is admitting that he was Metaletemon previously. So... when... exactly did he fall into the Dark Ocean?  Sigh. This is one of those "Let it go, Hidden" things, isn't it.  Uh, wow, I am totally unfamiliar with Kingetemon.  That's... a... thing.  

The use of screens and images in the stage play are really fun!  It must have been awesome to see this show in person O__o;;

OH SHIT, Yamato arrives in a cloud of smoke, that's how you KNOW shit is gonna go down!

OH MY GOD OMEGAMON ONLY GETS A HEAD OH MY GOD I'M DYING (Tony:  "HEY do you know how big that thing's supposed to be?!)

KOUSHIRO IS WEARING THE GOGGLES I'm down.  HIDDEN IS DOWN!  REVIEWER DOWN!!!!

HOLY SHIT JYOU'S "A" ON HIS MOCK TEST WASN'T REAL okay this is also a Good Joke, I applaud. Also I am LOVING sassy Koushiro in this? His way of being sassy is to do it in a way where you're not quite sure if he is trying to be a butt or not, which is 10000000% yes lol (In contrast, Izzy is intentionally awful usually lol).

Annnnd I was right from the start; Jyou is carrying this entire thing, lol.  Oh my god, the delivery on this?!?!??!  AMAZING.

HAHAHAHHAHAHAHA. LAUGHTER.  THEME SONG.  DRAMATIC POSE.  I THINK THIS IS THE END SHOT YOU GUYS.

 Now the actors are coming out to speak!

THIS.  LITTLE.  SHIT. I love him?  I...  I love him. The snark is strong in this one. I... he is so... so beautiful.  I...  I think I might be in love?  (This at least indicates that I wasn’t alone in thinking the computer toss was too much???).

YAMATO’S ACTOR JUST SAID "DON'T SAY GOODBYE," Well played, son.  I like the cut of your jib.

 AHHHHH OKAY OKAY I have no idea how I’m going to analyze this.  My surface thought is that this play features a lot of the emotions and inner thoughts of individual characters that can’t fit into Tri, and that (I personally think) Tri suffers from a lack of.  Because there isn’t really ship bait and maneuvering around a new character and plot, we’re able to see relationships that feel much more familiar to Adventure than we often see in Tri (ie, Taichi worried about Hikari, Koushiro worried about Taichi, etc).  As you noticed, I’m very unhappy with the way the play pushes the payoff back as far as possible, cramming it into an AMAZING twenty minutes or so...  But I loved those twenty minutes.

Also, Koushiro feels waaaay more like Koushiro than he does in Tri, except for Kokuhaku.  As your local insane Koushiro fan girl, I am standing and applauding and screaming and crying.  NO PERVY KOUSHIRO.  NO FASHION DISASTERS.  Just Koushiro being supportive and apt and sweet and trying so hard.  I am refreshed.  I am younger.

And the passion and love and energy that went into us, so visibly in human form...  I can’t describe how wonderful the actors and the puppeteers were.  And even though I kind of hated Etemon, his actor was incredible.

So the stage play has amazing points and really irritating points, but on the whole, it’s my second favorite thing Tri has given us (following Kokuhaku).  I will try to write about it more smart-like soon!  If you got this far...  I’m in awe, lol!  High five, my friend!

[dalishious]

@briannamorley Well I wasn’t going to respond to all your replies, but then I figured hell, if you felt the need to go through all my anti Celene shit to leave messages saying you disagreed, you must really value my opinion of your opinion, so who would I be not to?

briannamorley replied to your post “What ending should I take in WEWH? Last time I played I hadn't read...”

Love the page; disagree about Celine and Briala's relationship being toxic--save for her killing Bria's parents. I personally always reconcile them even if you weigh her over Gaspard, she's the lesser of two evils. Gaspard would do way more killing then a 1k elves plus, as far as the abuse we don't know the extent all Bria says is on days she was cruel, she imagined them being amongst the Dalish with Celine having to serve her.

So like... if having her parents murdered doesn’t cross a line for you into toxic territory, what does, then?

And re: “We don’t know the extent” of Celene’s treatment of Briala...

The black curls lightened to grey with the pre-dawn light, then slid to the light brown of cinnamon as the sun brought colour to the room. Dirt-brown, Celene had called it, when Briala had waited upon her as a girl. Horse-dung brown, an ugly shadow of Celene’s spun-gold locks. -pg 27

Briala, a WOC, grew up serving Celene, a white woman, comparing her hair to horse-dung. And had to just grin and bare it because that was her job, and her mother instructed her to be Celene’s friend.

“Maker, I envy you sometimes.” She knew immediately that she had said something wrong. She felt Briala stiffen, though her arms didn’t move, and Briala’s voice was light as she said, “The empress of Orlais envies an elven handmaid?” “You know what I mean, Bria.” Still holding her, Celene patted Briala’s back. “You could leave here, become someone else.” “As long as that someone is an elf,” Briala said with a dimpled smile, but Celene knew she was still hurt. “Yes, I know. But I... I was born to sit on that throne. I can’t do anything else. Since my parents and Lady Mantillon...” She trailed off. This time, Briala pulled away. “You would make a wonderful scholar,” she said as she stood and pulled her robe on, “at least until Emperor Gaspard made a decision you found objectionable. Then, I believe trouble would ensue.” She smiled over her shoulder. “You are probably right, my love.” Celene rose as well and pulled her own robe on, as if nothing were wrong. “And... I will consider Remache.” Briala nodded and slipped her mask into place, then left through the passage behind the mirror, and Celene sighed and fetched her little magical pot. She would be making her own tea this morning, it seemed. -pg 59

Celene hurts Briala, and her thought is how she’ll have to make her own tea.

Briala sat. “...The elves in Halamshiral are angry. Lord Mainserai killed a tradesman without justification, and the elves are calling for mien’harel.” At Celene’s silence, Briala added, “It is an elven word. When the humans go too far, the elves remind them that even a short blade must be respected. They—” “They will rebel,” Celene said, the words cutting through the chilly autumn air. “Against me. Now.” “It is not rebellion, Your Majesty.” Briala bowed her head and took a shaky breath, clutching at the griffon-head arm of her chair. This was exactly what she had feared. “The elves of Halamshiral have never seen you. Their grievance is with neither you nor Orlais. They only wish justice for a man of your empire who died without cause.” “What they wish is irrelevant.” Celene turned and stalked away from the window. “I am already fighting a war on two fronts. I cannot be seen to fight a war on three.” “Then don’t.” Briala rose, putting herself in Celene’s path. “Give them justice.” “A lord for the death of an elf? I... damn this thing.” With a quick jerk, Celene tore the mask from her face. Her face was flushed beneath, her eyes red from another night of little sleep. “Shall I declare the elves equal citizens before the Maker and the throne as well, while I’m at it?” “Why not?” Briala took her own mask off, stealing a quick moment to steady herself. “Unless you don’t believe that, and I’m just a jumped-up kitchen slut you haven’t tired of yet.” Celene turned away, tossing her mask onto an overstuffed couch and stalking to the great amber wall. “You know I cannot do that, Bria. I might as well engrave Gaspard’s initials on the throne.” Against the wall of gold and red, Briala’s empress and lover looked pale and wan. Celene had always seen sleep as an enemy, or at most a necessary evil, from what Briala could tell, and since the events in Kirkwall the stress of rising tensions had her awake before dawn almost every morning. If it were early enough, Briala could sometimes coax her into lovemaking, and the warm and drowsy bliss afterward would let Celene steal a few more hours of rest. Lately, even that had not been enough. Briala sighed. “I do know.” Instead of going to Celene, she went to the small table where Celene’s teapot sat, forever just shy of boiling. She poured Celene a cup of tea, brought it over, and gently touched Celene’s shoulder. It was not quite an apology. -pg 62

Briala fears having to ask Celene to enact justice. Celene says what the elves want is of no care to her. She then mocks the idea of elven freedoms. And “It was not quite an apology” my ass - Briala has nothing to apologize for.

What had happened at Halamshiral was a still-painful ache, but the elves had rebelled. Celene had done what she had to do. Had Briala been there, she might have been able to turn Celene to a different course, but Briala herself was the one who had left. It was not Celene’s fault that she had been manoeuvred into doing what she had done, any more than it was Briala’s fault for leaving Celene without the guidance she had wanted. -pg 167

Celene even has Briala convinced that she’s to blame for Halamshiral, because she wasn’t there to tell Celene otherwise. If one person in a relationship relies solely on another to guide their morals, yes, I would indeed call that toxic.

But anyway, these are just a few samples of Celene’s dismissive behaviour towards Briala. She only does the bare minimum to keep Briala at her side; she does not truly care about the elves.

briannamorley replied to your post “What ending should I take in WEWH? Last time I played I hadn't read...”

Also Bria has accepted that neither the city or Dalish elves see her as part of them; letting her rule with him as her mask--much like forcing them to work together--while interesting in theory, wouldn't last I don't think anyway. Ppl would get suspicious; Gaspard is a military strategist not an adept ruler

Briala goes from this:

Briala could not afford to spare tears for inevitable deaths. In that respect, she supposed that she was more like the nobles she served than the elves in the marketplace. The thought sometimes sickened her, but again, not as much as the thought of deaths she could have prevented. -pg 61

to this:

She had been in Celene’s court for too long. Too many years being called “rabbit,” too many years ducking her head and working from the shadows. Too many years of being proud of who she was, a feeling she could cling to like a floating log in a rushing river. It had kept her head above water, but it had never let her steer her own course. She would fight for her people, because nobody else would, and Fen’Harel take whoever got in her way. -pg 144

Briala’s whole character arc is about discovering who she is as her own person, and reconnecting with her people. Unless “has” was a typo for “had.”

Also, why is it unrealistic for Dalish and city elves to work together? Dalish elves go to the city, and city elves go to the Dalish all the time. In some cases you have clans that have very strong relationships with nearby alienages, such as Clan Boranehn and the Edgehall alienage in Knight Errant, for example.

briannamorley replied to your post “grandenchanterfiona: I don’t hate Celene because she’s a woman. I...”

Disagree not about the genocide or lying to Bria but everything else

...K?

briannamorley replied to your post “grandenchanterfiona: That’s it. Until proven otherwise the Masked...”

Nope to each their own though

...K?

briannamorley replied to your post “grandenchanterfiona: Celene is a straight guy’s idea of a lesbian....”

Stop... I can see if you were equating this to RR Martin but really???

Yes really lol

briannamorley replied to your post “I just read The Masked Empire and even though I knew how bad Celene...”

Theres disliking something and then there's bashing it to the point it becomes infuriating

Sorry guess we never received the guidelines one has to follow in terms of disliking something. Tell me, does it include going through a blog’s tags and leaving reply after reply that says basically the same thing?

briannamorley replied to your post “mllemaenad: jocelyntorrent: mllemaenad: … Okay, I don’t get it. ...”

Disagree but crazy tired so to each their own

Good thing you left another just plain ‘disagree,’ otherwise I might have gotten confused.

briannamorley replied to your post “So this by no means excuses Celene's actions whatsoever, but I noticed...”

Love orlais but again, to each their own

Cool cool I hate Orlais but to each their own. Perhaps I should find some random Orlais fan and spam their email notifications with replies saying as such, to make sure they know!

briannamorley replied to your post “lmao no, about 300 elves were brutally slaughtered, sweet summer...”

More than 300 but it does border on bashing

WTF does this one even mean?

briannamorley replied to your post “grandenchanterfiona: Celene has absolute power; she does not have a...”

If so say that from jump don't go on and on going from legitimate gripe to bashing... like damn I like both of y'alls pages but FUCK me this is exhausting

Then why are you reading through all this? And seriously, what is with this “bashing?” Is there some kind of internet slang I’m unfamiliar with? Because if you just mean bashing as in criticism that hell fucking yes I am critical of Celene. She has a lot of reasons for me to be.

briannamorley replied to your post “Remember that time when Michel de Chevin partook in the Academie des...”

Sigh... y es it was an oversight by them that shouldn't have happened but goddamn

“But goddamn...” what? Why is there a but? Why is there a but goddamn? Just... why, period?

Anyway, TL;DR: