#xernalia

[randomperson339]

Humans edit genes

*Thomas and Xernalia are at a horse race.*

Xernalia: Oh all above-how can we allow these horrible designs to just... exist like that?! They're worse than humans!

Thomas: I dunno, horses were just born like that. We're not gods, we just use what's given to us.

Xernalia: but you do change several animals- what about dogs and crops? You modified those- selectively bred dogs for certain traits and spliced genes in crops. What would be so different about giving horses an actual good body?

Thomas: have you seen pugs?

Xernalia: ...no.

Thomas: yeah, here. This is what humans did with genetic tampering.

Xernalia: What design even is that?!? They're not even able to breathe properly! Their ears are almost completely unsupported! What happened to them?!

Thomas:

Xernalia: human selective breeding.

Thomas: and GMOs have helped companies put more pesticides in our food. So it's probably best we don't tamper with more species right now.

Xernalia: so then why don't you use it for good?

Thomas: well, most people don't think about horses as that important. It would be a waste to use these techniques on horses. And why are you so insistent on this? You're not half as insistent with the human form.

Xernalia: well... it's different between you, a sentient being and horses, a nonsentient being. Plus, you're not dead in the water if you break a majority of your bones.... plus you're just sexy, alright?

Thomas: so... you're not interested in improving my body because you find it sexy?

Xernalia: yeah! I said it- horses's imperfections aren't sexy, but yours are!

Thomas: *laughing* glad to know my raw sex appeal keeps me from being remade by my wife.

Xernalia: well- no- maybe?- actuallyy.... no- yeah.... you're right.

[silksong-when]

some fanart for my good friend @obiusperson‘s fic image id:   image 1: xernalia says “hey thomas want a piece of this ass?” with a picture of her superimposed over thomas talking to a rich bug. Thomas looks nervous” Image 2: xernalia lays on her side in the “sexy pose”, with censor bars over her genitals and nipples, and her tail forms a heart over her body Image 3: furry xernalia with HAIR Image 4: a whiteboard drawing of a xenomorph queen, labeled “xernalia” looking over a stick figure labeled “thomas.” three little weaverlings sit at their feet, labeled “their children.” image 5: another whiteboard drawing with a stick figure Thomas holding a dead tiktik in his hands. There’s a speech bubble saying “it frickin dead” /end id

[obiusperson]

@silksong-when gonna see what happens when I input Xernalia lol

i got tired of there being no good oc quizzes so i made my own!

[frogblast-the-ventcore]

what did u think of the lore?

And also this is totally a warning about how you totally shouldn't ask on my other blog about how Thomas Xernalia and the other in their group would totally be able to sneak around Slaanesh's palace undetected lol

I liked it! It seems pretty well thought out.

[randomperson339]

In the middle of a war:

Thomas(normal human, a commander of the war): And where the fuck is my wife????

Xernalia(A giant black killing machine, Thomas's wife): I'm right here!

Thomas *rounding the corner* :Thank god we need to- what's that? Xernalia *dragging the gaping-open carcass of her enemy*: "a baddie.... wanna fuck?"

Thomas: "No I don't wanna fuck right now. I have some other things to do. and the blood, gore and other fluids aren't helping!"

Xernalia: ...you don't find this attractive?

Thomas: No I don't find this attractive. You're getting blood all over the carpet, that's going to be a bitch to move afterwards, and there's just so much we have to do!

Xeralia: Sorry! I didn't realize this would turn you off! Every non-human species appreciates this as an act of dedication.

Thomas *sighs*: Sorry. I'm just.. overwhelmed. We have to do [random tasks that cannot be delegated] by tomorrow and there's a lot on the tine and...

Xernalia: cuddles?

[randomperson339]

Humans have weird priorities

*Hera walks around, but bumps into something*

Thomas: Oh hey, didn't see you there!

Hera: and I don't see you

Thomas: yeah, I'm being invisible so that Xernalia can be dramatic. As a treat.

Xernalia *bursts into room*: "OH, where is my lover!? I'm ocmpletely heartbroken that he shalln't be revealed!" *starts dramatically fainting into a nearby bed. It goes on for quite a while.*

Hera: "I feel like it's gone far enough. She's like... butchering language to express herself."

Thomas: "...no, she's not inventing complete new words. That's when I stop her."

*Xernalia starts absolutely wrecking house with her claws* "I shall find you, one way or another!"

Hera: "I think this is when you intervene."

Thomas: "Nah."

Hera: "You're letting her destroy your home?"

Thomas: "Well, I was planning on replacing the sheets for a while now-"

*Xernalia rips into the mattress*

Thomas: "and the mattress for that matter."

*Xernalia has successfully spread the insides of the mattress all over the room, putting everything under a fine layer of fluff.* "Please come to me my darling- my poor pussy is-"

*Thomas throws off his cloak of invisibility* "Okay that it! No more drama for you!"

Xernalia: :(

Thomas: "and no make-up cuddles either."

Xernalia: :0 "But why?"

Thomas: "I know you, and I'm not comfortable with you discussing privates with someone who didn't ask."

*Hera discreetly left the room*

[obiusperson]

thanks for the tag

last song: The Reprise of Wait for Me in Hadestown

Favorite color: blue, and/or red

currently watching: bunch of youtubers, but been reading One Piece and Ruridragon

Sweet/savory/spicy: sweet 100%

relationship status: single

Current obsession: Xernalia/Thomas and their supporting characters IG, don't really have an obsession obsession ATM

tags: @silksong-when@snailsfall

Nine people i'd like to get to know better:

Tagged by: @bell-of-indecision, thank you so much for tagging me <3

Last Song: Gmfu by Odetari,6arelyhuman

Favourite colour: Dark red, violet, pink

Currently watching: Death note, ep6

Spicy/Savoury/Sweet: Spicy

Relationship status: Single

Current Obsession: Mbti types and cognitive functions.

Tagging: @somin-yin @a-cloud-for-dreams @axepen @hinsaa-paramo-dharma @basic-bitch-alkali @rhysaka @blackknight-100 @squishywizardd @reykalot

[randomperson339]

*Thomas, Xernalia and Luffy One Piece are walking down a road*

*Xernalia slows down to walk besides Thomas*

Xernalia: so... can we adopt him?

Thomas: No, I don't think we can.

Xernalia: *trying to explain herself* I mean, he's basically an orphan, he's good with the vibes, and he even wants to destroy the world government! He's the perfect candidate!

Thomas: But you're forgetting that we've known him for a week, if that! Even if he accepted it just because... which is a pretty Luffy thing to do, but that's besides the point- we're just not acting in that capacity at this time. A title

Xernalia: I mean, we're clothing him, hunting for him, and even building for him. We're basically his parents already, so why not make it official?

Thomas: Yes, but I haven't even started to do any therapy on him-

Luffy: hey mom, why did you slow down?

Thomas:....

Xernalia: Thomas wasn't informed you were calling me that yet! It's very startling... also, are you willing to adopting him as your dad?

Luffy: sure!

*Luffy continues walking down the road*

Thomas: ...no intimate time for you.

Xernalia: aw :(

[randomperson339]

LIttle thing I made for my OCs. Thomas is trying to not cause an inter-national incident, meanwhile Xernalia is just happy to be having a new experience and be sharing it with Thomas. It's not every-day a centuries-old being gets arrested!

[image description: Two white-board drawing. One is of Thomas with very badly drawn hair holding a sign saying "Thomas". On the other is Xernalia holding up a bitten sign saying "And Xernalia!"]

[randomperson339]

[randomperson339]

This has been noted for Xernalia

How to carry your girlfriend.

There wasn't enough room for on the neck, in the t-shirt or by the scruff but they're there in spirit.

[randomperson339]

Human petting

Xernalia: Thomas! I want pets.

Thomas (her husband): Not immediately. I have some responsibilities I need to attend to.

Xernalia: Can you do it... while petting me?

Thomas: I mean... kinda? It's some paperwork.

Xernalia (putting her head in Thomas's lap, pinning him): so... this could work?

Thomas: ...yes.

[Thomas begins scratching Xernalia's chin]

Xernalia: *purs in contentment*

Thomas: *works on his paperwork while petting with his other hand, gradually moving to pet the back of her head*

Xernalia: *gets more relaxed, before starting to squirm under his pets.*

Thomas: *gently bonks her with his other hand* I've told you. No horni before nightfall.

[Xernalia whines]

[randomperson339]

cuddle-fluff

Thomas is currently using his wife, Xernalia, as a chair. She insisted on it, since she wanted to be closer to him. And since for work they have to look somewhat dignified, the usual cuddling wasn't an option.

So now they're working in parallel on different subjects. Xernalia is currently threatening an entire species for one particular grain of rice.

These threat include, but are no limited to: dismemberment, gutting, and sever trauma to the most sensitive organs. even threats so vile merely writing them down would actively worsen the state of humanity.

Thomas meanwhile is currently negotiating for an armada from the same species. This particular armada has access to the most powerful weaponry ever conceived, along with the best defense in living memory. His offers have included: blankets, stuffed animals, and hookers.

Xernalia's attempts to threaten this species were overthrown when she forgot to maneuver her hand. Since it was currently resting on Thomas, that reassured everyone that she wasn't going to kill them.

Thomas then ended his negotiations, and proceeded to send threats so violent that writing them down would actively worsen the state of humanity to the call Xernalia was on.

Everything ended peacefully due to both of these master diplomats.

[randomperson339]

Xernalia woke up in-bed, the lavish silks doing little to ease the soreness she was feeling.

"Mourning." Thomas greeted her, holding out a tray for the Breakfast in Bread

She whined, settling down from her half-lidded position.

"Here you go." He gently tossed a piece of prime meat towards her, which she quickly jumped up to snatch out of the air.

"Can you just hand me the meat next time?" She asked as between bites.

"Well move into position so I can just leave this here." He said, not appreciating how she had just taken up the entire bed.... somehow.

After some disheartened shuffling, she made room for Thomas to sit down-

And she pounced, wrapping her arms around his waist.

"Well if you're going to play that game, you're not getting any more breakfast!" He said, lifting up the tray so that it was out of her reach.

"Nooo!" She mock-exclaimed. "Fine, I concede your stomach for more breakfast."

He put the breakfast at her level, letting her spill the meal on the already messy sheets.

"I'm also willing to clean up if I get to use you like a big teddy bear." She offered.

"Deal." He automatically said.

[randomperson339]

Aw thanks <3. My answers to the top 3 are that I have 5 published works so far, 109,669 words as of today, and I write for a variety of fandoms, although the ADHD goblin is liking @wolven91's Conservaverse universe right now. Beyond that I tend to add in a lot of my own stuff to any fandom I write for (My biggest fic is about 60% my own stuff, much more if you get into my other works)

4: My kudos by ratings are:

Insects Gods and Mortals: dude is thrown into Hollownest with knowledge of the game with a xenomorph chestburster inside his chest. Proceeds to realize how little of Hollownest's culture was preserved after the fall.

Status: Snakebitten: XCOM's grump old lady and the alien's young viper prince catch feeling for one another. Proceeds through a comedy of cultural misunderstanding

SLUTS: Breeding Drake: A very informative document about all the dangers of the Lugio Placenata, aka the breeding drake, and why you never, ever, under any circumstances fuck any of them because all the following absolutely disgusting things would happen to you.

A Guarded Heart: What if we could make love to the Tyrant guard?

The Attack Against the Hive: a teenager does super powerful tricks against the super powerful xemomorphs!

5: I absolutely respond to comments- when appropriate

6: attack against the hive has the angstiest ending I suppose. Though not many of my fics have endings yet

7: A Guarded Heart kinda wins the happiest ending by default I suppose. One of them is a story in the 40K universe, so the ending afterwards is probably horrible, but the rest of my fics either aren't completed, don't really have an "ending" because they're more of a point in time than a flow through it, or are the answer to the other question.

8: no hate, but someone did say that A Guarded Heart wasn't what they liked

9: Yes. 40% of my fics are smut RN, and that's only going to go up from there!

10: I don't write crossovers, yet. I might write a TOH and Amphibia kinda crossover with some characters from Insects Gods and Mortals, then put them into Steven Universe and/or Gravity Falls, but those are just plans and I haven't written anythign beyond those vague outlines. TBH I just make my stuff cross over with whatever media I'm currently consuming TBH

WTF There'ss no question 11

12: no fic translation

13: not really co-written, though a friend did edit some earlier chapters of Snakebitten/Insects Gods and Mortals. After that I just kinda started to bounce ideas off of her.

14: My fav ship of all time is Thomas and Xernalia. Yes they are both my OCs, yes the girl is very hot and the guy is completely beyond average, but they both have so much going on that kinda doesn't fit into the linear format of English. IDK, maybe someone will be able to understand it if they read everything I write about them in the next decade lol.

15: a lot of smut, some OC stuff, and/or my old WOF WIP that were connected to an acc that has been deleted.

16: I think I'm very good at thinking things though, and examining what both needs to happen for the immediate effect I want and what needs to happen/not happen for the later scenes.

17: My weakness is how much I can actually write in a day TBH. It's hard to concentrate on a scene that is going somewhere but I'm not at the interesting part yet (and I mean like, I'm going to get to that interesting part in a few sentences but I cannot make myself write them yet). This is somehow nullified when I am made to write out long posts that won't ever really go anywhere, but my braing likes to write them.

18: my thoughts on writing dialogue in another langue for a fic is that, ultimately, language is a tool. The correct application of that tool depends on the effect you're going for. I haven't found a reason to use another language that exists, but there are various reasons to use it.

19/20: the first fic you could really call a fic and not me just plagiarizing concepts from The Lightning Thief would be a really edgy fic where Peacemaker from Wings of Fire gets tortured by memories of his alter-ego. I do not remember the title, but I do remember that I did post a few more chapters which petered into nothing.

20 Questions for Fic Writers

1. How many works do you have on Ao3? 49. I have a few options for #50…

2. What’s your total Ao3 word count? 299,440. Ok, I hadn’t realized I was that close. Now, my answer to #1 might be “a new 560-word drabble.”

3. What fandoms do you write for? I’m nearly exclusively writing for Avatar: Legend of Korra, with a little bit of Last Airbender, where it fits in.

4. What are your top five fics by kudos?

1. Rainstorm - Su is there for Lin, for once. 2. The Well of Need - My first long-form story, with Lin taking care of Kya. 3. This is My Anchor - A mid-sized Kyalin story where Lin doesn’t make Kya take care of her. 4. I’m Sorry I Need You - An angsty one-shot that fits with a couple others in the “marriage is hard” domain. 5. Walk With Me - A longer-than-intended one-shot variant on a Tumblr joke.

5. Do you respond to comments? I do, as soon as I can. Sometimes, that means getting off work. Sometimes, that means giving a response as meaningful as the comment was to me. 

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? For complete stand-alone stories, that is likely Something Changed, where the last words are usually joyous. I can’t find the link for the worst-worst ending I have, so just pretend that never happened.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? The happiest ending? I like my happy endings, so this is tough. But I think I’ll go for Elemental Changes, because that launched my collaboration with @slowdissolve on Red Jade.

8. Do you get hate on fics? Not hate, exactly. One reader informed me that I had ‘let them down’ on a follow-up story because I didn’t write the story that was in their head. 

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? I’ve done a little, but it hasn’t been a focus for me. And, aside from the polyamory aspect, it’s all as vanilla as it comes.

10. Do you write crossovers? What’s the craziest one you’ve written? Not unless you count LOK + ATLA a crossover, which I don’t.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Not to date.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? @slowdissolve and I wrote Moonsigns together, and we published two versions. One is told in first-person language and color coded, on Tumblr. We then followed it up with a more traditional third-person version that does not rely on color, on AO3.

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship? Kyalin is where everything opened up for me. 

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? I’m taking quite the long view of all of this. I haven’t added to Their Sacred Year in a while, but have the outline for the next installment, so I don’t consider it abandoned.

16. What are your writing strengths? Folks seem to like my dialogue and plotting.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? I struggle with the final rising action / climax / falling action, to keep the pacing appropriate to the story.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I don’t plan on it, given I am uneducated in the languages appropriate to this setting. 

19. First fandom you wrote for? Legend of Korra.

20. Favourite fic you’ve written? Saving the hardest for last. Naming the favorite child. Ok, fine. In that case, I’ll have to choose <wrestles with self> Elemental Changes (see #7), mostly because it’s a completely off-the-wall idea that I was able to see through and complete. And to have Slowdissolve illustrate the ending was an absolute capstone.

So I get to thank both @krastbannert and @wishingforatypewriter for their invitations!

Now, it's time to throw the floor open to folks like @yell0wsalt, @dont-blame-it-on-the-kids, @linguini17, @frogblast-the-ventcore, @badlucksav, @cdlunee, and of course,

you.

[randomperson339]

Anthropromorphization

(Xernalia, an alien, married to Thomas a human. She has found him hunched over cloth and scattered stuffing.)

Xernalia: Hubby... what are you doing?

Thomas: trying to stitch this teddy-bear back to life.

Xernalia: ...you know it's just stuffing, right? There isn't anything to bring back to life.

Thomas: Is that the weirdest thing I've done?

Xernalia: ...no, but I don't know how you're defining life here. It's inanimate

Thomas: yeah... but I feel bad now that it's all torn up, so I'm stitching him back together

Xernalia: Why do you have empathy for an inanimate object?

Thomas: probably because evolution would want me to have emathy for something that's inanimate than something that could be my mate

Xernalis: that's stupid, evolution should've given you a better way to detect the sentience of things.

Thomas: I mean, it did get me an amazing wife.

Xernalia: Wh-no, itt- not worth.... ahgiueaowjhBIEVUCybnowriadnsjc, how dare you say that's the reason you married me was because of some faulty neurons

Thomas: they're hardly faulty if they let me get with you

Xernalia: I mean- you're not wrong, but also. You're conflating several ideas.

Thomas: no, the "faulty neurons" are there to differentiate what is and isn't human, since you can't interbreed with non-humans.

Xernalia: but-

Thomas: yes, you can with genetic manipulation, but evolution wasn't made for to account for magical genetic engineering.

Xernalia:..........

(Thomas gives an affection peck on the head to Xernalia)

Thomas: yeah, I know it's stupid to get hung up about a destroyed plush, but I wouldn't be able to live with myself if I just didn't repair it.

Xernalia: What about the object puts such importance on it?

Thomas: *shrugs* I dunno, I just feel sad when I think about it all torn up.

Xernalia: so, it's like empathy?

Thomas: kinda? It's not sad on an intellectual level, but on an emotional one. I feel for the plush, but understand it's an object. And it doesn't have feelings.

Xernalia: would it change anything if it didn't have a face?

Thomas: probably.

Xernalia: what about a non-quad-limbed body structure?

Thomas: less so than the faceless version.

Xernalia: what about if it was a monster?

Thomas: I married you, didn't I?

Xernalia: >:[

Thomas: sorry, I just couldn't resist. And an actual answer would probably be... depends on how it's monstrous.

Xernalia: So it's about how... human-ish the thing is?

Thomas: roughly, yeah.

Xernalia: so what about a ball that's been left to rot? It was once used, lovingly, by a dog but it got lost in the drain and now it's decaying slowly at the top of a pile of trash?

Thomas: Xernalia... plz don't play with my emotions like that...

Xernalia: oh! Sorry. I- I thought you wouldn't get emotional over a ball.

Thomas: humans get emotions over a lot of things. I even got emotional over computers and satellites, which are very not-human.

Xernalia: so, you just empathize with... everything?

Thomas: yeah.

Xernalia: 8(

Thomas: What's that look for?

Xernalia: It must be so hard to live like that. I mean, you eat meat, right?

Thomas: well, it's different because I need to eat. Thinking about the animals is just something I try not to think about. Like everyone else

Xernalia: All humans feel bad for what they eat?

Thomas: I mean, not everyone, but that's the general feelings I've heard

Xernalia: so it's more... selective?

Thomas: Yeah. I mean, that's why wars happen I think.

Xernalia: so this empathy can both be given to anything, but also taken away from anything else. That seems... stupid.

Thomas: yeah, it's stupid, I feel like it shouldn't be so easy to stop thinking about people as... people

Xernalia: I think it's stupid that it's so arbitrary- you're here, trying to revive an inanimate object, despite it never living

Thomas: well, I was thinking more "I want there to be less violence in the world" not "I want humans to be more accurate in their assessment of sentience." You really want to make humans more sensical, don't you.

Xernalia: no, you're hot when you're nonsensical!

Thomas: Glad to know nonesense is hot, I shall endeavor to always put my socks over my shoes from now on

Xernalia: Not that kind of nonsense!