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tippytopdays · 3 years

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Just a Typical Morning

literally slapped a fresh coat of paint on this little thing and did some proofreading, posting here because it's not really a story i feel like belongs on my Ao3

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A snap. A small flare of light. A hiss. The light goes out with a brief spike of pain. The scent of nicotine filling his lungs, sitting there for a moment before being lazily huffed back out. He rolled the cig between his teeth, canines catching the paper.

For once, it was a slow day. Quiet too, if the silent city ruins said anything about it. No howling of some crazy Zed in the alleyways, no rushing of cars; nothing. Then again it’s probably something like, 6AM if he thought about it, since the sun wasn’t high enough yet to count as day.

Well as close to day as it could get, he assumed. It wasn’t like he knew anything else, anyways.

Deimos gripped the cig between his fingers, watching the flecks of tobacco sprinkle over the railing. The balcony was small, granted, but it was enough. Throw on a piece of metal or two along the railing and it even made for some quick cover if there was an attack. Overhead assault was harder to avoid, especially from so high up.

The end of the cigarette glowed dimly as he inhaled, smoke trailing into the air.

He didn’t like being up this early. It was too quiet.

Normally by now he would probably be going downstairs to fetch some grub from the cafeteria with Ford, talk about their evenings or whatever else would come up. Sometimes he’d be scrambling to get his gear on to check whatever combusted in the lower levels. Of course if it was the mercs just screwing around and breaking whatever had gotten mixed up with their roughhousing then he’d get upset. Fixing that shit isn’t easy you know, but it wasn’t worth straining his voice anyways; Ford could do that for him in spades.

He sighed in a soft plume of smoke. Really, what else can you do when the hired help has to be a bunch of knuckleheads, anyways?

Whatever it was, he definitely wasn’t throwing any parties for them that’s for sure. Last thing anyone needed was those guys keeping everyone up all night by being loud as fuck.

Another drag, a slight shake in his fingers as they met his lips.

His arms hurt like Hell from having to spend so long rewiring that at this point he was surprised they were even remotely steady at all. And when he thought about it him waking up at the ass end of dawn because the comms had crashed again was probably a good reason as to why he was up so early. Digging around in cramped crawl spaces was not how he wanted to spend his day; and being tossed into a late night mission on top of it was even lower on that list.

Damn his bed seemed real inviting, early morning or not.

When was the last time he’d slept in? Or just had a day off? Sure they’d had low days along with the high ones, but when did they get an actual break where they could relax? The last time there wasn’t some kind of emergency or chaos outside their doors was at least a decade ago at this point, maybe less. He didn’t really have it in him to care much, since he didn’t keep track of the days anymore. No point to it.

More smoke filled his lungs. He really should just get some extra shut eye, rest until he felt better.

But, for some reason, he couldn’t.

He’d snapped to awareness with a cold feeling of dread weighing down his stomach. It had been so strong he’d shot up, halfway reaching for the pistol at his bedside thinking someone was there. But there wasn’t. It was dead quiet, like the moments after a bad mission.

Maybe that’s why he was outside right now. The casual air helped to mask the intent in his eyes as he scanned the skyline.

A glint of reflected light from a nearby rooftop nearly made him crush the cig in his hands as he tensed. Eyes snapping upwards he focused, but relaxed when all he found was a few familiar faces among one of the many teams patrolling the area. He snorted, smoke curling around his face.

Another pull, the cold wash of nicotine a nice cleanse to the tension in the air.

He was overthinking this.

And after all they’d been through, who could blame him really? Being constantly on the run would make anyone look over their shoulder or keep a gun within reach. Still, it wasn’t like the Agency knew where they were this time. To add to it nothing could get through the blast doors even if it tried. They’d tested those well enough for him to be certain.

It was just a very quiet night and he wasn’t used to it. That had to be it.

The cig smoldered between his lips in one last drag before he flicked the used butt over the railing. Arms raising over his head he stretched with a groan, “Damn,” He muttered, wincing at the series of pops going up his spine, “Ya’d think I’m getting old with how I crack like a handful of spaghetti.”

He was done with his morning smoke anyways.

Mobility returned to his spine Deimos rubbed at his neck he turned his back to the city, meandering back inside. Hitting the switch beside the glass door to slide it shut behind him he glanced at the clock on the comically cluttered bedside table he owned. Yep, too early for him to be this awake, if the glaring red 7:37 was anything to go by. Well mostly glaring, since his cap was haphazardly draped over it when he’d tossed it there yesterday. Or last night, he didn’t look at it then because he was too busy flopping face first into bed.

A healthy gurgling from his stomach brought him out of his thoughts.

That’s right. He didn’t eat last night either. Not really any time to when you’re face first into the ugly end of some bastardized wiring job done nearly half a decade ago. He hummed under his breath.

Was it too early to get something from the cafeteria? It was still morning he supposed; maybe some breakfast sausage would be left this time since he’d be able to get there first for once. The thought alone was tantalizing despite the exhaustion tugging at the edge of his conscious.

Did he even change after all that sweatshop work yesterday?

Pulling at the hem of his tank top he took a whiff. Yep, stunk of old sweat and probably a hint of grease; he didn’t. Pants probably didn’t smell too great either but who would check those and not come off like a weirdo? A quick sweep of the cargo pants half hanging off his hips proved them to be good enough with no obvious stains or rips.

Deimos shrugged. It was good enough. At least he didn’t stink of blood or anything, otherwise Doc would be on his ass hard. Though it wasn’t like anyone would be able to tell the difference in this sausage fest anyways. He’d be fine for a quick early morning bite.

Just needed to grab his jacket and boots and he’d be good to go.

Deimos scratched the stubble lining his jawline while he scanned the room. He’d taken off his jacket somewhere mid collapse but he couldn’t place where. He wasn’t one to lose things—most of the time at least—but sometimes it felt like they just up and disappeared. With his luck it would probably end up in a really obnoxious place like behind the bed or something. Not like that would happen since the thing was braced up against the wall in the corner so it had to be somewhere around here.

He paused when he noticed the distinctly leather looking lump laying on the floor beside said furniture.

Oh. There it is.

Approaching the bed he picked up his jacket off the floor. It still had some dust from when he’d been crawling through the vents last night as he swiped a hand over the shoulder. He grimaced at the sticky webbing that stuck to his fingers; a few cobwebs, too. Gross. Shaking it to clear out any excess dust he threw it on haphazardly, adjusting his pants once it was snugly over his shoulders. Belt tightened up again he’d turned towards the table and nearly tripped over his own boots.

Welp, at least those weren’t far either. Glad he’d had half the mind to take those off before crashing.

Cursing a bit under his breath he snatched his cap off the clock. With a quick sweep of his hand through his hair to straighten it a bit he put his hat on and sat on the bed, scooting his boots closer with a foot. Once they were laced up and buckled he got to his feet, ready for the day—or at least, the really early morning.

He glanced at the clock again. It blinked lazily at 8AM.

Eh, early enough. But the call of some sweet breakfast sausage was not to be ignored.

The moment he turned towards the door there was a series of firm knocks. He jumped, nearly tripping again as he cracked out, “Uh, yeah?” Damn that cig wasn’t enough apparently because his nerves must still be fried from that morning.

“Deimos, it’s me.”

His lips quirked a bit, confused. Normally, Doc only went after him when something broke or got jammed up again but a glance at the tablet resting on the table face up didn’t reveal a blinking light for a missed message. Unless something went wrong in the handful of seconds he’d been standing there then why was he trying to talk to him now of all times, “Hang on.” Tromping across the room he swiped his code in, the door opening with a hiss.

Doc was standing in front of his room, arms behind his back and head turned away as he kept his focus down the hall before turning to face him. He scanned him head to foot, “You look like shit.”

Deimos rolled his eyes with a huff, “Good morning to you too, Doc.” Leave it to him to state the obvious. Not like he didn’t already feel like crap in more than a few ways. He propped an arm against the door as he nodded towards him, “What’s up?”

2B stood a bit straighter, and just by his posture alone he had a feeling that whatever he was going to say wasn’t good, “Boss called in this morning, we have another assignment.”

Well he wasn’t wrong.

Deimos sighed, traces of smoke licking at his tongue as he tossed his head back, “Seriously? Now? Doc I haven’t eaten yet.” As if to prove his point his stomach made yet another unhappy glug. Both men glanced down, the tech sweeping a hand towards it with brows raised.

“I can tell.” Doc merely returned his gaze placidly, “Have you seen Sanford yet?”

He shook his head, “Nah. Haven’t left until now.” Though if he were to take a guess, he’d say the demolition’s expert would be working out somewhere.

It seemed they shared the same thought as 2B nodded, “I assume he might be downstairs at this hour. I did hear some commotion from one of the training decks.”

He chuckled a bit. Typical Ford.

“I want you to be ready within the hour, Deimos. You’ll get to eat when you get back. I’ll tell the staff in the kitchen to keep something in the oven for you.” He turned around, fully intending to leave before adding, “And also, get some washing done when you get back. You smell like a corpse.” With that he took his leave while Deimos scowled at his back.

Great. Of course it would be doc who’d notice.

Still he only sighed, punching the code into the panel to lock the door behind him. Getting his gear from the locker he had downstairs would only take a couple of minutes, and Ford should already be up if he was taking up a training room.

Just another day in Nevada, per the usual.

Things never really change.

#madness combat #Deimos #2BDamned #my writing #fun

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shiftytracts · 4 years

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This was gonna be a scenario post, hence the A and B format, but got so long (2.4k) it almost counts as a story. I’m less sure it counts as emeto--it’s all nausea/general digestive upset, no actual vomit. Also mentions scat and weight gain, but those tags would definitely constitute false advertising; they’re more like incidental story elements than kink elements.

A’s on new meds, whose side effects include slight but near-constant nausea. They wander one morning through the dark, brown-carpeted house they share with B (their SO) and another housemate (C), coffee cup in hand, still slightly sweat-sticky from bed but without the time to shower. It’s a small, thin-walled house, and C’s not up yet, so A and B keep off their shoes for as long as they can, trying not to make too much noise. A muffles their burps into the crook of their elbow. B makes eggs and toast for both; A’s gotta wolf ‘em before their appointment, but wishes they hadn’t—or at least that they’d skipped the orange juice, and maybe saved brushing their teeth for after breakfast. They head to their appointment with their heart pounding in their gut, queasy and bloated and short of breath, bubbly stiff cramps forming in new places every time they bend a different way, belly rumbling so much they wonder if B can hear it, if they can see it shake, can see A’s navel through their t-shirt.

(“Be honest”—A implores, when they wander back from the can to the kitchen sink where B stands washing grease off the breakfast plates—“do I look like a total fatass?”

(“What? No.” B laughs, rhetorically, and adds, “Why?”

(“Well ‘cause I sorta feel like one is all,” A says, peremptorily stroking up and down past their navel, but regretting it when this uncalled-for jiggling further upsets their stomach.

(“Aw. No, you look fine,” B assures them. They look back to their dishes, then at A again with preemptive shrug: “I guess if they were really looking someone might figure you’d had a big breakfast, but.” A yanks at their shirt, hoping to obscure this; “Don’t do that, you’ll stretch it,” B reminds them.)

A tries to crap before they leave but no dice—not time yet. Nasty cramps and cold sweat all through their shrink appointment. Comes home, gives vent to the pyroclastic flow, then collapses supine on the bed and unbuttons their shorts. Takes a nap.

Despite their best efforts B’s doings in there an hour or so after that wake A up; they direct A to the water glass they set by the bed. “Oh. Thanks,” A yawns, and asks if B’ll hand them pajama pants. B smiles and complies.

“Not going out again then, huh? Not feeling well?”

A shrugs. “No, I’m okay now, just kinda.” They try to make a hand gesture for tired or loopy, but judging from B’s lack of answering nod they figure this doesn’t suffice as explanation. “Might later though, I don’t know.”

“Mm.”

“Should eat something, probably.”

“Ah, yeah—get back on the horse?”

“Haha yeah.” Meanwhile A rubs their belly up and down as though to sound its opinion on the level of drawstring tightness they’ve selected. B sits next to them for a sec, puts a hand on their back, pecks their jaw.

“I guess you are a bit chubbier now,” B admits, feeling guilty for how they dodged A’s question on that score this morning.

“Seems that way,” allows A. This, they’re pretty sure, is the previous med’s fault. They wouldn’t’ve switched were that its only sin, of course, but the thing had the gall to be useless aside from its side effects of weight gain and insomnia. “Is it gross? Should I.”

“What? No,” B says again, and laughs rhetorically as before. “‘Gross’? Of course not.” B bats A’s jaw, very gently, playfully. “No matter what happens, I’m just happy you’re getting help.”

A’s answering smile lasts maybe a quarter of a second. “Thanks.” All the same they stand and spread their arms out to either side, to give B a better look. “Sure you don’t mind?”

B smiles, shakes their head chidingly, incredulously. “Why would I mind? It’s kinda cute, if anything.” To prove they mean it they go around behind A, rest the side of their face on the back of A’s neck, snake their hands around to A’s front and slot each one atop their waistband so B’s palms fit in the hollow between pelvis and flab. Roots around til they find the end of A’s shirt, pushes it out of the way, un- and re-does the drawstring so their pajama pants sit at a more flattering height. “That too tight?”

“No, it’s kinda grounding actually,” A shrugs. “Thanks.”

“Mhm. Now go eat something.”

A eats some leftover rice with soy sauce—C ordered way too much rice with their takeout two nights ago, and left the extra up for grabs. Then A figures they can handle two Oreos. Can’t stop burping after that, but only feels a little queasy, little squirmy. Lies on the couch with their laptop, alternately studying and playing Tetris (they’re a week or two into the fall semester; today’s Friday, which they have off from both classes and work). Until C gets home, at which point Mariokart happens. This makes A feel sick, though, not sure whether in a too much food or not enough kinda way, so they take their computer and go back to the bedroom, telling C they just want to remove themselves from the social distraction. Maintains this ruse until about halfway down the hallway, then lets go the foodbaby they’ve been suckin’ in and moves their free hand up and down it as they round the corner into their bedroom doorway. B’s all dressed and ready for their friend’s party now; has to go soon. They’re crisscross-applesauced on the bed looking at their phone, but they look up when A comes in. “Hey.”

“Hi! Feeling better?” B asks, with a slight frown that suggests they know the answer.

A busies their hands with setting their laptop on the bed so they can say, “Nope—queasatronic,” without seeming too self-pitying.

B nose-laughs but says, “Aw. I’m sorry.”

A shrugs, sits. “Eh.”

“Want me to stay home?—I could—?”

But this time A says, “What? No. ‘Course not, you should go. I’m fine, I’m.” (Shrugs, realizing already that this’ll sound like a guilt trip and wondering whether they secretly mean one. But they’re too bushed to think of another ending to the sentence.) “I’m used to this; don’t need a babysitter. You should go.”

“Okay. Thank you. If you’re sure.”

“No, please. Seriously.”

“Alright. What time is it?” B chirps, then presses the top button on their phone and reports, “5:24—yeah okay, I should go. Take care, feel better. Need anything?—I could stop at CVS, or.”

“Uh…” A mimes thinking about it, then spaces out for real.

“Well, you can text me if so,” B laughs.

“Cool. Sure. Have fun.”

“Thaaanks,” B says, swinging themselves by the hand around the doorjamb as they slip out. A arranges themselves supine again, hands folded on their stomach. Lets out an unimpressed sigh as though in summation. Doesn’t really wanna take a nap, but they try playing Tetris again and feel too icky when they try to focus their eyes on the screen. Closes their laptop but does not remove its warm weight from their lap, even though in the 5pm heat its plastic sticks to their wrists. Burps, mouth open, not loudly exactly but sorta high-pitched—as though they were an adolescent boy with a soda can, they scoff. Then wonders if they have any more diet ginger ale. Wanders out to the kitchen, in the extra wall space between which and the dining room (B calls it a “breakfast nook,” but A just assumes that’s a joke they don’t get) they keep their soda cans stacked on the floor next to the milk-cratey recycle bins. There is indeed one left. They grab that and a cup (and two ice cubes outta the tray in the freezer), too lazy to fetch the one B put water in for them earlier, and remind themselves to text B that they’ve run out.

C’s still out there, and notices A’s choice of beverage. “You alright?”

“Yeah, just. Guts’re on the fritz again.”

“Hm. Sorry, pal.”

“It’s cool.”

“You gonna be able to find something you can eat?”

“What?”

“Tonight, I mean. Is there food you can eat?”

A shrugs. “Still some rice left I guess.”

“I ask ‘cause I’m going to the store in an hour, so. If you want some saltines or something.”

“Oh.” A laughs; adds, “thanks. Think we still have some from last time though.”

“Okay. Well, if you think of anything you want.”

“Sure. Thanks.”

“No problem; good luck.”

At this departure from Hope you feel better A laughs slightly. “Thanks.” Heads back to their room, drinks their soda and melty ice. This is the hottest-ass part of the day, so when it’s gone they balance the still-cool glass on their clavicle. They feel much better now, if sorta bloated and fizzy. Quease level comparatively minimal. Figures they should eat again while they’ve got the, uh, guts for it.

Once they start on their second round of rice A finds they’re pretty hungry. Adds soy sauce a lot more zealously, this time, and risks the last leftover spring roll as well but regrets the grease. Has to make up for it with the unsauced bits of rice clinging to the edge of the styrofoam box—you know, like, a palate cleanser or whatever. They hiccup a little, then belch when they bring their plate to the sink, from the contact between gut and the edge of the counter: hadn’t thought about the extra room they take up now. Rubs a peremptory circle into the left side above the navel but finds they feel alright, for now—then 20 minutes later heads into the can, expecting lava from how their stomach cramps and rolls, but gets out only some air and a few wispy pebbles. Notices with greater dismay, then, on the way back to their room, how their belly queasily sloshes around when they walk. Doesn’t seem to have shrunk much.

In B’s mirror, back in their room, A finds they look pretty gigantic, too; they changed into a looser shirt after the first one got too sweaty, and in this comparative tent all you can tell is that the gut’s the widest part of their profile. They set their hands down on it to bring it down to size, and are dismayed at how little difference this makes. Does feel nicer that way though; leaves ‘em there as they trudge slowly back to their side of the bed, and pushes slow circles into each side. Sits heavily on the edge of the bed, hunched over a little. Can feel the tightness in their stomach that means either it’s going to rumble in that long drawn-out violating way where you feel like it’s loosing all your secrets or that you’re going to belch so loud you’ll wonder if you have to puke. Waits, then gives up on waiting and slowly, laboriously lies down. Stretches a little, tempting fate, but it kinda hurts: ties a weird knot high up on the right when they loosen back up. They put three fingers on it gently, and try to iron it out back and forth. Ah!—there it goes. Stomach starts growling, seems to shake everything up, then once that uneasy shifting’s done with it still keeps up the sound what seems a ludicrous, embarrassing long time. When that’s done they sigh and then burp a little. Laughs at themselves for this display. Carefully carefully carefully turns onto their side, facing away from the door, and tries to sleep, a protective hand curled around their stomach.

When B gets home much later that night they wake up a little (“Oh. Hi. How was the thing.” “Hey! Sorry to wake you. It was fun; I think it went well.” “That’s good.” “Mhm.” “Anyway good night.” B laughs: “Haha okay. Go back to sleep A.” They mean to reply at your service but instead say, “Open sesame”; B laughs and pats their hair so it itches their nose. When A swipes at it snot comes loose. They decide not to open that pandoras wormtails); figures they’ll fall back to sleep quick until the consciousness of nausea slides back into place, at which point they try to roll onto their back and find themselves ludicrously heavy. It takes several tries, and all their breath. They groan with bored self-pity, forgetting they’re not alone in the room.

Meanwhile B struggles out of their clothes and into pajama pants and an inside-out (but not backwards) tank top in the dark. “You okay?”

“Blugh. Not great.”

“Aw, still?”

“Yeah… nah,” A says, blinking, confusedly forgetting which answer is appropriate. “I gotta pee,” A decides. This helps a little, since it wakes them up all the way and therefore allows them to disentangle the need to pee from their other woes. In the bathroom mirror they look mostly deflated up top but still extra puffy and round lower down; at least it doesn’t hurt their stomach to stand up anymore. Only hurts like a menstrual cramp does after you take ibuprofen, but the quease that in that case is only incipient is much worse here. At one point they cough, and dread this “pandoras wormtails” too when it alerts them to all the mushy brittle things in their throat and chest. This also makes them start burping again, so that that’s how they end up greeting B when they get back to the doorway of their room: fist over their mouth, wincing a little, leaning into the wall for balance. B’s a good sport though. They face each other in bed and B lays both their warm hands on A’s stomach, whimpers in pity at how blown up they can tell it is.

“I’m sorry you don’t feel well,” they say in that affectionate half-asleep tone that always comes out querulous.

“It’s cool,” A says back.

B sloppily nods so that their jaw thuds against their pillow, hair spilling into their eyes, and tells A, “Just try to go back to sleep; feel betterinthmorning probbleby,” trying to get all the words out before a yawn.

#emetophilia #emeto cw

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kc-anathema · 4 years

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I’m so sorry I did another long post so soon...

So a long time ago, I received a flame on Spec Ops 98: Jazz's Interrogation at Soundwave's Pedes. I hadn’t received a flame in a long time, and I haven’t received one since (which is amazing, since this was on chapter 26 back in...dear heavens, 2015. This fic is officially an epic.)

In fact, I stopped reading the flame once I realized it was a flame, about four chunks in. 2015, five years ago, I was changing principals, changing schools, trying to figure out how to marry my Canadian then-fiance and figure out immigration. (Fun type--marry her in Vegas, wait a couple years, bring her over. Use a lawyer to make sure it’s all kosher.) So yeah, didn’t read.

And then a concerned reader mentioned to me that I didn’t deserve this awful flame and that they loved the story. And I thought...oh yeah, there was a flame on this. That was a couple months ago.

I finally decided to break the flame apart like I used to. This feels very nostalgic to me. I found out that this is really the flamer’s only claim to fame--they flame fics and troll writers. I’m not going to name them then, although you can find the easily on the ff.net review page for this fic.

My father once told me that, if anyone ever spraypainted slurs across my house...leave the slurs up. Don’t pay to remove them. Let the awful words stay up until everyone in the neighborhood is begging us to take them down again.

I think leaving the review there says more about her than me. And I’m going to enjoy clawing this apart, I think, like a cat scratching apart a lizard.

Flame begin:

We’ve got a problem if Soundwave is involved here and he’s not pulling his usual ‘Decepticons, Superior’ line. Add on a fic about perverts and we get this. Ah, well. What are you gonna do?

Remember the character Sheldon from The Big Bang Theory, and how he said “Bazinga” all the time? That kind of went from a joke to an overused character crutch. Like ‘dynomite!’ or ‘did I do that’? Is it really good to rely on a character line to the point where we can call it ‘usual’?

“I’ll take my pleasure and that sweet aft” – Sounds like a cheesy commercial for Robot Chicken. Fireflight is locked up in a dungeon and is about to be whipped by a BDSM Starscream. That’s not at all OOC. Basically it’s a fanfiction that talks about fanfiction.

I...um. Yes. Yes, it’s an OOC line modeled directly after pulp fiction zines and tijuana bibles. I literally looked up several of those on the Internet Archives and various old men’s magazines covers. It’s not fanfiction directly, although it’s certainly what fanfic evolved out of.

Do these look subtle? Low key? Classy? Tasteful? It’s cheap trash and it’s fun as hell. I don’t think readers at the time thought that these were in any way true. This is right along the lines of drawn hentai. So I think the flamer admitted despite themself that I did good.

“We’re stuck here in the middle of a war...we don’t have time for sex” – That’s right. But that fact doesn’t apply does it?

...reading trashy, porny magazines is not sex. It’s actually something you do when you can’t get sex for whatever reason. I would know. A lot of us would know. Apparently not the flamer. No one thinks that “hey, I got a chick/dude willing to bang right now...but the new issue of Men’s World is out! Can’t miss that!” Unless you have some serious fetishes that your partner is too weirded out by, I think this does indeed apply.

Then Jazz gets captured and lo and behold, Soundwave is revealed to be the Christian Grey of the story. I hope he has some maid outfits for Jazz.

...our flamer hits the sludgy bottom of the joke well and grabs their shovel. They do not try very hard for originality in their insults. And, while Grey was a jerk, Fifty Shades wasn’t quite a prisoner of war scenario. No, that was a cheap romance for chicks. I’m writing more akin to men’s...oh.

The flamer is a chick.

Their only bdsm or bad romance experience is with Fifty Shades.

I don’t think they read much.

Annnnnnnnnnnnnnnd we have a shower scene. Damn if it’ll be Carrie!

Iiiiiiiiiiiii did not write a shower scene?

Dudette, did you even do the reading you say you did?

There’s no point in adding moral ambiguity, especially in regards to Soundwave. He won’t be swayed easily, or at all, by Jazz’s speech. He’s cold hearted for a reason. He serves the Decepticon cause until the very bitter end. He’s a lot like Shockwave that way. Highly doubtful he would find meaning or even the relevance of writing pornographic fanfiction, but eh, this was never meant to be serious, was it?

...no. It’s a humor fic. The flamer is criticizing a humor fic for being humorous. Kudos for identifying the genre? I mean, the flamer is also complaining that I did not write Soundwave as a one-dimensional factionalist without examining what that means for him and how the mission creep has left the original political crusade behind. It’s not like I took pieces of Soundwave from Gen1, IDW, and the comics and blend them all together.

This reminds me of the fanboys in the TMNT fandom who keep pushing for every iteration to simply rehash their nostalgia boner for the original toon. I feel like I’m getting the Transformers version of wanting less of this:

because it isn’t the familiar characterizations of this:

“So what’s the down low?” – You, Jazz. You’re going to give the down-low to Soundwave. I can’t wait to read how shiny his robo-vagina is.

...wow. Classy there, flamer. Also I really don’t think they read anything. This whole fic is plug n’ play. There’s exchanging of cables, talk of code and positronic souls and sparks and revving engines. There isn’t a drop of sticky, spike, or fluids.

Chapter 15’s sex scenes bore me. Nothing is worse than having a guy ask to remove every bit of clothing. Just do it already! And why is Jazz a virgin? Come on!

Look--the thing about sex and fetish and whatever revs your engine is that it’s not going to rev everyone’s engine. You don’t like the type of interfacing here? Fine. I don’t like those kind of sex scenes in my porn either. But I wasn’t write that scene for porn. I wanted write warbuild Jazz dealing with violent subroutines while interfacing with Prowl. I had fun with it.

Why is Jazz a virgin? The previous 15 chapters discuss that.

I really don’t think the flamer read the fic.They scanned for anything remotely sexual, so I don’t think I’m going to take anything they say about this fic being ooc for perversion’s sake.

“Everyone here is damn pervy” – In which a character talks about the author.

“We gotta get Soundwave to finish writing his story” – Why? I mean, what’s the point? It’s not doing anything for them, unless it’s to show how castrated Soundwave is. I’ve seen him act better in Mary-Sue fics.

There is a whole plot about Starscream and Skyfire, and I thought I could trust the readers to be intelligent enough to make the leap with the parallels between Soundwave and Jazz.

This is literally the only review that questions why Jazz said that.

The Mary Sue shot just echoes the Fifty Shades swipe. I think this flamer did most of their flames roughly ten years ago--the insults are pretty dated.

The Decepticons don’t know about Ratchet? Why? I mean, he’s one of the oldest dudes there. He has a reputation. When you have a reputation, people know about you. It’s inevitable. I think your inner logic slips a lot.

At this point, I literally have 21 previous chapters of world building.

I am not surprised that the story’s logic was slipping away from one of us.

It’s funny to read the forum responses in the story. It’s like the author is trying to make fun of detractors yet ends up making fun of herself.

Okay, this part is hilarious for a reason only briefly noted in the fic. I think that the only things this can refer to are the comments from the chapter titled Flames of the M4gn1f1c3ntSkyPr1nc3--because those are literally the first flames/comments I put in the fic. And I didn’t write them!

My wife wrote them! I don’t write Starscream well but she just poured those out like water--she’s seen more of the hysterical side of fandom, particularly the earlier TF fandom, and I snipped out pieces for the fic.

So...I mean, we’re pretty happily married, so I don’t think she counts as a detractor. ^___^ Ultimately I started writing this fic for her.

“Your optics make me crazy” – Not at all a cliché.

Good thing I didn’t write that, then. Here is that little section in the Prowl/Jazz section. (Took me a bit to find it since I plugged that into the Find and couldn’t bring it up.)

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I like what you do to me. Jazz allowed him in, tilting his helm. I never really understood it, y'know? How mechs could lower their guard so much. Let someone this close.

And now? Prowl drew back, wanting to see Jazz for the answer. With a quiet ping, he warned the other mech even as he raised his hand, touching Jazz's visor.

I still think you're crazy always going on about my optics, Jazz said, venting even as he disengaged the locks and let Prowl gently remove the blue polycarbon.

Your optics are perfection, Prowl corrected him. And you let me see them. Hundreds of mechs wondering what's under that visor, but I get to see.

Still shy about letting someone else see them, Jazz turned his head, only for Prowl to touch his cheek and turn him back, coaxing his optics to open with a soft brush of his thumb.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Not bad for an asexual, I think. I mean, it’s not like I have a ton of hands on experience, being kinda broken that way. But I have read plenty of pulp magazines and pulp radio shows!

This didn’t take long. I skimmed through this work, because there was so little content. Lots of ridiculous shit, though. Soundwave writes fanfiction, the Autobots are weirded out/turned on, capture Soundwave, Soundwave realizes that his whole life was a life and decides to defect. Yeah, about that. He wouldn’t do it lickety split, let alone EVER. Hell, the reactions in the forum bits show what some would think of this, if they weren’t too busy fapping.

The funny thing is I don’t think the mechs can even fap. I don’t write them doing that. But yes, flamer, I do believe that you skimmed through the work. Particularly since you’ve recounted it backwards...Soundwave captures Jazz as the capstone to a long internal conflict within himself, but rather than go through chapters of internal monologue and Decepticon politics, I started the story as close to the inciting action as possible, not quite in media res.

I won’t hash out why Soundwave defects. I mean, I spent 22 chapters at that point explaining it. But it’s my fault the flamer skimmed, I guess?

Needless to say: the romance bored me senseless. It was poorly written, and overall there’s really no skill attached to this. You don’t grip the audience and Jazz’s virgin mode made me roll my eyes. Reads like a first-time waifu manga.

Nah.

I’ve been writing way too long and am more than self-aware enough of my own failings that I’m also pretty self-aware of my own strengths, too. And no. It’s not poorly written. I definitely feel I could improve the first few chapters a bit, but that’s because I wrote those over five years ago and I’ve improved since then, too.

Empty insults. Maybe if the flamer had gone so far as to give a critique beyond a couple of misquoted lines and their own headcanons, I might have listened, but there’s literally nothing of substance here beyond a child tantrumming that I’m stupid and bad and should feel bad.

As for the other pairings, booooooooooooooooooooooorrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrring.

Usually I have a fun time setting these fics on fire, but this one bored me senseless. Yes, it was stupid, but the author’s attempt to authenticate it are just as sloppy as anything else.

“Authenticate”?

Is this person talking about using fandom tropes as my setting?

There are 22 chapters at the time, and now 51 chapters, building up this world and using roughly 20 years of fandom background to inform the fic.

Maybe if they hadn’t skimmed, they might have found something interesting. But considering that they skimmed over anything character related and stopped for the sex scene--I don’t think that says anything about my writing and more about their own proclivities.

They were trying to read one-handed. A plug n play fic. A long meta look at fandom in war in a humor fic. And they came here for the sexy times.

I don’t have to draw the conclusion here, do I? Well, for the flamer, probably. And then they’d glance at it for a second, call it sloppy, and say I showed nothing, and what I showed was boring, and that boring stuff was ooc anyway.

One thing I am thankful for is the fact that it is not long.

51 chapters later and I’m still not done.

Nothing’s worth remembering in this and I don’t need to tell you that these characters either act like simpering imbeciles, or are virginal waifus. All I’m missing is a senpai in the bed, some tissues, and some high quality lotion.

...why do they keep referencing gay human sex? I mean, I get it, they’re saying that it’s similar to yaoi fics, but.

This is anti-yaoi with its last hurrah, isn’t it? The late 90s, early 2000s, rising from its sludgy well to try to shame the easily cowed and intimidated, the young writers easily startled by long lines of text. No wonder the citations used are so...15 years ago. I mean, who was talking about Sues even 5 years ago. That criticism kind of faded a long while ago, even then.

I think the sad thing is, even the badly written Sue sex fics end up being more interesting than this. If Ebony Darkness D’Mentia Raven Way were to come along, I think this story would get better. What with her ‘I shot him a gazillion times’ lines.

...and there’s the cherry on the top. Third cheap shot firing blanks. Sue + Fifty Shades +...shit, I can’t even remember the title for that infamous fic. It’s that old.

...this fanfic flamer is old.

Like, don’t get me wrong. We’ve got fandom moms and grandmoms who cut their teeth on fandom print zines in the earliest conventions. They’re not “old” in the same way.

This person has lost any joy, humor, or playfulness that fanfic comes from. No one should go into fanfic expecting fine art. I mean, sure, it happens sometimes, but this is a playground of pulp, experimentation and just plain childish fun.

All in all, not worth remembering. It’s makes me tired to read it. It’s not even stupid enough to make me laugh. You’ll still get a fail rating for me, especially with the shitty version of Soundwave here.

Yes, fanfic flamer. You are indeed tired.

He should be on Big Brother. He’d be great making soy lattés and purees.

Big Brother in 2015 was in its 17th season. There were roughly around 6 million viewers at the time. The demographics for the tv viewing audience were graying even by the 2000s, and by 2015-18, it was significantly older.

Granted, it’s a very tenuous conclusion to draw, but combined with the old fandom references, the anti-yaoi vibes I’m getting, and the fanboyish desire to curate their own headcanon of a character to the point of insulting writers on the internet...

Flamer grew from being a reader to a bitter, old person angry and the whipper snappers for writing stupid, trashy crap that they criticize with broad, unspecific insults.Flamer is the stereotypical mean adult in any 90s cartoon or heavy metal rock video.

A little depressing. Poor flamer. I do hope they found more creative, engaging, and positive things to do.

Me? I just wanna rock.

Thanks for coming to my ted talk on pulp fiction and bitter cultural creators.

#in a nutshell #sorry for another long post #I just wanted to finally do this #after thinking about it for awhile #felt like a loose end #fandom #fanfiction #transformers fanfic

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imagine-a-killingharmony · 6 years

Text

Pregame Cast Time

Here's maybe a difficult request but I know you can do it! Can you do head cannons for the pregame v3 cast with a s/o. If you cant do that it's ok. Please and thank you plus I love your stuff.

I usually don’t do the pregame cast, nor do I really allow entire cast asks so I’ll just ask if you ask for the rest of the cast I didn’t do in another post for later, I’ll do the male cast first?

Honestly I’m surprised y’all are into my weird pregame headcannons, but I’m all in.

-Mod Pregame Shuichi

Kiibo

(His AI hasn’t fully been made quite yet, Team Danganronpa’s keeping him as the audience surrogate but before they do so, they let their robot travel to school to try to learn human emotions, that goes as well as you would expect...)

Kiibo was an odd student who had come towards your school one day, he never spoke like... other kids do, he spoke much more robotically, calculated, emotionless, it was quite... odd to say the least. (But he seemed lonely, so you befriended him, then he asked if you could pursue being his romantic partner!)

He’s quite fine with harming himself for your sake, he doesn’t see his own safety as high priority, saying he’s merely a spare, which you always try to counter but he’s far too good at countering otherwise, he always calls you arguing against him: “highly illogical”.

His hand feels like cold metal, freezing whenever you touch them, so he’s taken to wearing gloves, but even then you can’t help but to feel a chill.

You can tell, he’s really trying his best with this relationship, but he’s very new to being romantic... but he’s trying! He says he can’t buy you anything, nor does he enjoy to eat (thinking about it, you’ve never seen him eat...), so he often sticks to romantic affection like... pressing his lips against yours, holding your warm hand in his cold one even if his body feels like cold metal, you swear you can see him actually smile.

Kiibo never talks to his backround, nor does he ever let you come to his house, he says you would never enjoy his family, that they wouldn’t appreciate you either.

He was odd, Kiibo. But at let he would let you know with the only thing that seemed to confuse him, words of affirmation to prove he loved you ever so often...

“I love you” means a lot in this relationship!

Shuichi Saihara

(An fascinated Ultimate Fanboy of Danganronpa that seems to hate people otherwise, usually has his head tucked into a book so you REALLY wouldn’t know the kind of shit he’s into. He usually uses Danganronpa as a vent towards the weird emotions, has a thing for drafting his execution then gets all excited at the thought of death.)

Shuichi had been the one who showed you around your new school, you truly wanted to know what was under that gaze of his so you chatted with him, it wasn’t actually... pleasant at first, even though with remarks to please “go away”, but soon he found that he couldn’t make you go...! (Actually he wanted you to stay, so he asked if you could date each other.)

Shuichi was an... odd but at first, he talks casually about how your execution would be if you signed up for Danganronpa, going into a disturbing amount of detail, he... oookay, you tried setting him straight on that but he didn’t actually seem to get it?

Shuichi has warm hands, slightly hot even when you put them in yours, he says it’s because his phone usually overheats... yeah that’s understandable.

Shuichi’s way of showing romance is communication, he’s usually not one for physical affection, it’s embarrassing, he prefers if the two of you could just... sit wherever, talk about whatever with no judgement between the two of you, that’s the perfect date in his terms.

Shuichi’s mother was a odd lady, she accepted you into the family as soon as you walked into the house, begging you to take good care of him, your unsure on why the two of them didn’t talk much... but you held back your questions, it clearly made them both uncomfortable.

Shuichi doesn’t say, “I love you” to just anyone, so when he does...

It honestly feels like your flying on cloud-nine, he really only does it if he gets flirtatious or if he’s... really thankful he has something other than Danganronpa to obsess about.

Ryoma Hoshi

(An popular guy that’s pretty much amazing at anything, sports included! Super optimistic at almost anything, he’s planning to adopt a cat and kick some ass when he grows up! Gets... attaches to people easily, really attached.)

Ryoma visited the tennis club, you were the leader so he hadta’ go to you to get taught, n’... things progressed from there! He thought you were a real sweetheart so he asked you out, he was a pretty popular and really really nice guy, so how could you possibly say no?

Ryoma’s a valiant type of guy, he’s the type of guy that would calmly joke about gladly laying his life down for yours as a joke, but... you aren’t sure if he’s joking time to time, really he gets into that knight act.

Ryoma’s hands are... room-tempature, they feel small in yours but he has such a tight grip, but it’s... affectionate, really gentle just as they seem.

He would show romance any possible way he could, if you want compliments? Stellar! You look amazing today, seriously! Hanging out? Perfect! He’s already at your house with the popcorn! Kissing? Great! Your now making out, who cares where?

His house? Why would you two need to go there, ever? Ryoma dislikes his parents, much more so because their easily to... make angry so they usually depress him out (he swears it’s not like that kind of one, here check his arm!), so you’ve never actually met the folks... it’s probably for the best.

Ryoma’s the type of guy who would say “I love you” over a mic overhead to millions of people if he could, he wants to announce his love to the world! Which is you! Yeah he snuck a pick-up line in there...

He’s... one of the good people in a world like this, you know?

Kaito Momota

(A delinquent who never attends class, an avid smoker at that, and the basic definition of what to stay away from at school, he’s surprisingly a loner, a tired one at that who believes effort just isn’t worth it. Kind of... a tsundere, not like anyone can see that considering he has no other friends, unless you count the people he frequently beats up.)

How did the two of you possibly get together, well you had to ask him out, you didn’t think he was that bad... then your friends dared you on top of that, he just said: “sure” and done was done. You were dating, no regrets, nuh-huh.

Kaito jokes about using you as a human shield, you doubt he actually would, honestly you probably be using him as your weapon of mass destruction...

His hands are big in comparison to yours honestly you feel safe with his hands over yours, his are rather cold, but you hear that means they usually have a big heart...? Guess it’s an myth, has to be.

Kaito’s not one for... PDA, he seems to loathe it actually, calls it dumb too, but whenever your alone he loves doing small acts of affection, his face flushes red whenever you hug him back, then trying to push you away, it’s kind of cute...?

Kaito’s stuck with his grandparents, he’s surprisingly really nicer with them around not even grunting once, you can’t help but feel a bit surprised he’s bringing you to them instead of his real family...

He said: “I love you” once, you never let him live it down, every time you say it he feels a little part of him die on the inside.

Guess you shouldn’t completely judge a book by it’s cover, eh?

Rantaro Amami

(Getting back into school after the killing games, he’s a bit broken from his expierences but he tries to hide it off with an unusually big brother attitude. But signs of the killing game remain with how cold he can become within seconds.)

You weren’t that big of a fan of Danganronpa so you hadn’t completely understood why the rest of your class was fawning over him the minute he came into the class, he was uncomfortable so... you comforted him the two of you talked it out, became good friends, then more than that.

Rantaro’s... knightly, you could totally see him joking about him saying he’ll be your knight in shining armor... but he probably let you usurp that role if you just asked.

He feels... kind of natural when you hold his hand, normal, he treats your hand as royalty making sure he doesn’t grip too harshly.

Rantaro loves little acts to show that he cares for you, patting your head, hugging you, pressing a light kiss against your forehead, small “I love you”, little declarations of his affection.

... Rantaro doesn’t actually have a family besides a little sister, they survive on their own on funding given by Danganronpa, it takes everything you have not to pinch that little sweet girl’s cheeks...

Rantaro tells you he loves you daily, he’s a sweet guy, might be the sweetest guy you know.

You love him too, so you remember to tell him yourself that daily too.

Gonta Gokuhara

(A passionate student body president whose trying his best to make friends and keep the school in order, he had a gruff upcoming as a bad doer himself once so he really really wants to change that view about him!)

Gonta Gokuhara was the Class President of your entire class, he was scary to everybody else but you didn’t think looks mattered all that much, and gained the nerve to talk with him, you fell in love instantly when he asked if you needed assistance with your homework.

He would die for you, you actually think he would jump off a cliff if you asked nicely enough, and that’s horrifying. He truly dedicated himself to showing his passion towards this relationship, but maaybe that’s a bit too much passion?

Gonta almost crushed your hand when he took it into his own, he profusely apologized after it, so you... usually hold your hand over his, so it doesn’t get crushed...

PDA isn’t allowed on campus but otherwise it is A-OK! He truly doesn’t mind it then, but he usually just affirms his love by screaming at the top of his lungs that he loves you.

His father isn’t ever home the time you come around, then his mother passed away a while ago, he really wants you to meet the guy he just explains he’s busy a lot... you try to remind him it’s alright!

Gonta Gokuhara screams his declarations of love if you heard me before, I’m serious about it.

Your eardrums feel like their bleeding, they might start if they take anymore of a beating but it’s for love!

Kokichi Ouma

(He’s the leader of the Occult Club, he’s often bullied due to his small stature seems like a timid meek lad, but he can get creepy sometimes... Pretends to be a big evil villain when he gets afraid of his own shadow.)

An member of the Occult Club... Leader of it too, he asked you out one day while shaking like a leaf, how could you possibly refuse when he looked on the verge of tears?

Kokichi can’t actually... defend you, he looks weaker than a twig, you could easily snap his bones with a little: crack if you put a teensy weensy bit of force into it.

His hands are tiny, pale, kind of sweaty and shaky too, you had to hold them tight for them to stop trembling like crazy...

Kokichi’s a sweet guy, he’s bashful but he’s not completely embrassed to show you his love... he... um, gives you small little poems he made, complete with a small little spell that wards off evil, pretty nifty huh?

He lets you come to his house anytime you want, his parents are completely nice people, he even has eight little siblings walking around that don’t really look like him... he did a small cute routine with them, complete with a little pose. (He says they like pretending to be a gang of super bad super villains, he’s the leader of course.)

Kokichi admits he loves you, always in a stuttered weak voice, but when he finally says it he looks somewhat proud of himself...

You really don’t want to know how they’ll take the next phase of your relationship together...

Korekiyo Shinguuji

(A totally normal teenage boy with a bit of a troubled past, he’s a bit lazier than most people, somewhat chiller than most people too, probably pass being stabbed with an: “eh”. He gets sick easily, and lives with his sister.)

He just asked if you wanted to be his ‘one and only’ one day, in the middle of class without a slight change in expression, he shrugged when you asked why but... why would you refuse? He seems pretty cool, so why not? Screw it as they say.

Korekiyo? He’d probably sell you to Satan for a cornchip hadn’t he liked you, he’s on pretty rad terms with you so... he’d prefer you not die...?

... He’s got bandages wrapped all over his hands with many scars, you can feel the scars every time you intertwine your fingers, you can’t help but to wonder on how he got those...

Korekiyo probably shows love in stupid ways with engaging in stupid conversation topics with you, he likes leaning in against you and affection though, don’t get em’ wrong, he just really wants someone to talk to.

His house is completely empty anytime he brings you over besides from his older sister, she’s a pretty nice lady... they seem to have a lovely sibling bond, like nothing could break it.

Korekiyo... would literally choke than admit he loves you, that’s so cheesy thooo... if he... does admit it, that means he’s... likely sad, really sad to actually admit it.

... You should comfort him.

#mod shuichi #mod shumai #ndrv3 imagines #ndrv3 x reader #shuichi saihara #kokichi ouma #ryoma hoshi #kaito momota #kiibo #rantaro amami #korekiyo shinguuji #gonta gokuhara #pregame danganronpa #pregame headcannon #ndrv3 spoilers

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falseroar · 5 years

Text

Dark Laughter Part 8: Studio Time

((Here are links to Part 7: Just Be Happy and the start of the series, Part 1: What Dark Saw. Hey look, no warnings this time!))

The studio space that the egos used was, much like the rest of their home, not quite right with reality. Every time it was used it seemed just that little bit different, whether because the ceiling was slightly higher one day than the next or the segmented walls weren’t guaranteed to be in the same place every time the studio was used. Considering the wildly different uses the egos put the area to, there were props and flimsy backgrounds littering the floor everywhere outside of the relatively small space that was actually used for filming.

It also didn’t help that keeping a steady crew outside of the egos themselves was nearly impossible, as the guests weren’t the only ones lucky to survive even one segment. Right now, aside from the four egos standing around the cameras, the only other normal person was a man attending to the monitors where an earlier recording of Bim’s game show was playing.

“Wilford, why did you drag me here?” Dark asked, noticing that the Google standing among the other egos had already spotted him and was attempting to give him a warning glare. Dark returned it with interest and a silent promise to make the android regret any hasty words this time.

The glare was somewhat ruined when Wilford threw one arm around his shoulders and patted Dark’s cheek with his other hand. “I think it’s time to put you in front of the camera again! The fans have been asking for it, and this face deserves to be on the screen!”

Wilford shook his hand after the pat to dispel some of the cold seeping from Dark’s aura as he scowled. Behind him, the row of monitors began to flicker with static and ghost images while the intern pulled off his headphones and threw them as far away as possible.

“Or behind the camera is good too. Can never get enough help these days, and yes, Jerry, I’m talking about you. Tell your wife I said hi!”

Wilford ducked to avoid the mike that sailed through the space where his head had been a second ago and added to Dark as if nothing just happened, “But you want to get in the in, on the up and up, am I right? Here’s where we start.”

Wilford winked and strode across the studio floor toward the four egos.

“Good evening, everyone! Are we ready to start?”

“If you mean start my show, then yes,” Bim said, straightening his tie as he watched Wilford approach. “I have the studio for the day, and we still need to go two more rounds. Isn’t that right, my lovely contestants?”

“Uh, they all, uh, made a run for it,” Eric said from his place offstage and away from the cameras even though they were clearly not on. “During the break. The crew too. Jerry, um, he was the last one but I guess he’s gone now? Not that, uh, that’s Mr. Warfstache’s fault or anything, I’m sure he…had other things to do…”

Yandereplier hissed under their breath and said, “Yeah, kind of hard to finish the game without the players. Sorry, Bim.”

Yandereplier shrugged and the red-shirted Google appeared to be unable to care any less than he already did, but Eric seemed to make a determined effort to appear even smaller than his usual cowering. Bim’s anger, however, had only one target in mind as his eyes narrowed behind his glasses.

“Why do you do this every time?! Can’t you let me finish one segment without you butting your giant pink mustache into it?”

“Well, I don’t see how all that was my fault,” Wilford said, not backing down as Bim stormed up to him. “I’ve warned you about locking those doors, but you’re always so surprised when people run away because they ‘want to live’ or whatever. Why do you even bother with these game shows, anyways? Oh, whoop de do, ‘I’m the next Alex Trebek’ or whoever the kids are watching these days. Why don’t you ever change it up a little? Have some fun?”

Bim swelled up and gripped the lapels of his jacket as he gave Wilford the hard stare. “How dare you! Alex Trebek is a national treasure!”

“I’m…not sure that’s what you should be taking offense to,” Dark said as he approached. “And I also recall that you made an attempt to host your own game show, Wilford. What exactly did you have in mind here?”

“Hm…” Wilford paused to consider, long enough to confirm to everyone present he had no clue, before he said, “Oh, I know, how about an interview! Haven’t done one of those in a while.”

“And you’re not doing one while it’s still my studio time,” Bim said.

“Besides, how exactly is doing the thing you’ve always done changing it up?” Yandere asked, but both hosts ignored them.

“I’ll have to get my interviewing knife,” Wilford murmured to himself, patting down his thighs as he spoke. “How embarrassing, to be caught out with only my shooty and no stabbys.”

“Yan, go dig out some costumes, Eric, put on a wig, and Google, find some egos with nothing better to do, we’re finishing this show!”

“…Can I be the contestant that doesn’t have to go through the grinder?” Eric asked.

“Grinder?” Dark repeated.

“Only if you get your questions right!” Bim answered, playfully slapping the younger ego on the back. “…And get lucky with the Wheel of Wow.”

“No one is going through any grinder,” Dark said.

“Because we’re going to need to set up for the interview,” Wilford added. “Eric, find my chairs, Google, set the lighting, Yan, keep being beautiful, you. Oh, who should our guest be? I hear there’s a kid named Sally Face who’s got some wild stories to tell, we just need to get past the guards and—”

“Uh, no, we’re going to finish the game! You can’t just leave the grinder waiting!”

“…I rather think we can,” Dark muttered, noting to himself that this is exactly why almost no one else in the house ever got presents from Santa. He reached out and grabbed Eric’s shoulder while he waffled back and forth on who to listen to and said, “Just give it a minute.”

“I, uh—” Eric flinched as both Wilford and Bim threw out conflicting orders on what he should be doing as their argument escalated, starting with reasonable requests such as to get one of the others and going on to tearing down the set, finding a prison guard’s uniform, and turning on the “fighting music,” whatever that was. “Should we do something?”

“Nah,” Yandere said as they pulled out their phone to check some messages. “This happens all the time. Just let ‘em vent, right Google?”

“To save on memory and data usage, this unit ignores orders until the fighting stops,” Google answered, watching as Bim reached his arm up and around, trying to get a hold of Wilford’s mustache from the half nelson hold Wilford had him locked in. “Longest recorded time was 4 hours, 37 minutes, and 3 seconds.”

“Only because you stopped counting during the great pineapple on pizza debate because you said it was stupid,” Yandere pointed out. “That lasted, like, weeks.”

“Yes. We completed several tasks while you lesser beings were occupied arguing the merits of frivolous and ultimately meaningless energy consumption,” Google said, smiling to himself. “It was a good time.”

As entertaining as this was, Dark didn’t feel like waiting to see if these two would break that record. “That is enough. Wilford, enough!”

He hauled on both of them, pulling them up to their feet and using his aura to separate the two long enough for Wilford to fix his suspenders and Bim to run a hand over some flyaway hairs.

“Neither of you are going to be recording anything,” Dark said, and interrupted them before either could protest. “Bim, you have no crew, no contestants, and you might as well just try to salvage what you can from what you’ve already recorded at this point or start over. Wilford, you don’t even have a guest, much less any prepared questions, and again, no film crew.”

“Pft, who needs preparation?” Wilford asked.

“Weren’t you just saying you wanted to try and work on scripts a few minutes ago?” Dark asked.

“But this is my studio time, I don’t want to just waste it.” Bim scowled. “Who even asked you, anyways?”

“I could let Wilford put you back into a headlock,” Dark offered. “There’s enough cameras around here, maybe we could film that and post it instead.”

“I mean, I got most of it on my phone already,” Yandere chimed in. “But if you want to keep going, we could get some sweet angles, maybe get some props to beat each other with. Google, you can handle music, right?”

“I have access to a wide variety of music which may be suitable for this situation,” Google said. His eyes blanked for a moment and then he added, “Would you prefer heavy metal or banjo?”

“Banjo!” Wilford answered, cracking his knuckles.

Bim paused to consider and said, “You know, if you wanted another pair of eyes on those scripts, I’m sure we can come up with something…A little less harmful to my health?”

Wilford’s mustache tilted as his mouth twisted underneath it and he stroked his chin. “A crossover, you say? A little something to keep the fans guessing?”

Bim couldn’t hide his relief that Wilford was already moving on to another idea, but that meant he now had to follow up. After a moment of struggle, his eyes lit up. “You know, these ninja warrior, ultimate champion obstacle course type shows are fairly popular these days.”

“Obstacles?” Wilford grinned and rubbed his hands together. “Pits. Pendulums. Possibilities.”

“I know where we can get some chiranhas who are ready for some fresh me—er, fun.”

“Bim, my buddy, I think it may be time to move outside of this studio and really get our hands dirty,” Wilford said, throwing an arm around the ego’s shoulders. “Tell me more about these chiranhas.”

Dark watched the two of them start throwing ideas back and forth and admitted aloud, “I may have just unleashed a great evil upon this world.”

“Eh, it’s Tuesday. Bound to happen eventually,” Yandere said with a shrug. “You should see what I got up to in the Occult Club last week.”

“Remember, don’t make any deals with demons without letting me vet them first,” Dark said out of reflex and Yandere snorted. He noticed that Google was still giving him the glare and asked, “What? What problem could you possibly have with me right now?”

“It is my directive to keep an eye on you when in the same vicinity in case you revert to previous modes of behavior,” Google answered. “That same directive warns against behavior designed to curry favor or increased familiarity in an attempt to regain your previous station within the house.”

“For how long?” Dark asked. After all, he could wait. He had been patient before, he could do it again.

“Unspecified.” Google turned his head at a call from Bim and walked away without waiting for Dark’s response. Probably a good thing, as Dark wanted nothing more right then than to rewrite the android’s “directive” in a…manual kind of way.

Before long, Wilford and Bim were drawing out plans across the studio floor with Google running numbers and Yandere throwing in the occasional suggestion. Eric watched from a distance, “um”-ing and attempting once or twice to suggest that some of their ideas might be a little too lethal, but to no avail.

They were so wrapped up in their plans that some time passed before Wilford looked up and then around the studio before asking, “Say, where did that Dark go? He should be helping us!”

“Disagreed,” Bim said. “Do you think a second flamethrower would be too obvious?”

“He left a while ago,” Eric said and looked away when Wilford gave him a sharp look. “I guess he, uh, had something he needed to say to Y/N? Only they walked by the door and he practically ran after them.”

“Logical error noted,” Google said and grunted when Wilford pushed past him and ran out of the studio.

“Yeah, like that,” Eric said weakly. “Is…is something wrong, do you think?”

“Eric Derekson’s statement is incorrect,” Google continued, scowling a little as he rubbed at the spot where Wilford’s hand hit him. “Y/N is currently in the infirmary with another Google unit, and they have not left the room since they arrived two hours ago.”

“Well, it looked like them,” Eric said, frowning.

“Maybe you just wanted to see them,” Yandere said. “I see my Senpai in all kinds of places. In the clouds. In my tea leaves. In the monitor connected to the secret camera I set up in his bedroom.”

“…What?”

Bim sighed at the flurry of notes and stood up, dusting off his pants as he checked his watch. “Is it that late? We’re going to be late for dinner, and I have a feeling Wilford won’t be coming back anytime soon from wherever he’s run off to. Come on, if we’re too late, Chef Iplier will rope us into helping wash the dishes.”

“Ugh, I had prune hands forever after last time,” Yandere said, leading the way to the studio door.

But Google beat them all to it and slammed the door shut before locking it on the inside.

“Uh, what’s the deal there, Googs?” Bim asked.

The ‘G’ glowed on his red shirt, but the android’s eyes were vacant as he spoke as if reading off from an internal memo.

“Lockdown has been initiated. No one is to leave their current area, and no one is to go anywhere alone or unsupervised. All egos are to remain in place for their own safety.”

---

Dark swore as he rounded the corner and found yet another empty hallway. He had seen you just feet ahead seconds ago, but there was no sign of anyone as he continued on, checking every door he walked past as if you had enough time to duck inside before he could catch up. Rain lashed against the windows and he realized that, at some point while he was in the studio, a storm had blown in. Right, the King of the Squirrels had said something about it earlier, hadn’t he? But now the wind shook the house as Dark made his way from room to room before stopping outside of one door in particular.

He knocked, but no answer came from inside your bedroom.

After a pause, he opened the door and peered inside. The room was dark and clearly empty, but he still turned on the light and walked in.

Your bed was undisturbed (how long had you been staying with Mark this time?) and there was nothing obviously out of place as Dark made his way to the closet door and checked inside, just to be on the safe side. A flash of lightning outside the house briefly added to the light in the room and Dark stared down at the empty closet floor.

Where did you hide, when you were at Mark’s house? Was the closet in your room there enough to block out the lightning and thunder and the memories they brought with them?

Dark shut the closet door a little harder than necessary, causing one of the pictures pinned to the board on the wall nearby to flutter. He paused, taking in the series of photographs of you with the other egos, and Mark, and the other friends you had made in the time since you came here. Below the board, a strange stuffed animal sat on top of the dresser, its wide eyes meeting Dark’s. Its species was a complete and total guess, although for some reason Dark hovered between duck or lion.

In its lap was a dried rose petal. It had faded since the time Dark gave the rose to you, the almost black hue more clearly a dark blue that tinted toward red on the outer layer. And, for some reason, there was a trace of green running straight through it.

Dark frowned at the sight of that third color and reached for the petal, but realized he had no time to think about that as thunder shook the house.

“Wilford,” he muttered and turned toward the door.

Only to stop short when he clearly heard a knocking sound, but not from the direction of either door. Following the persistent sound of the knock, Dark turned around and saw the mirror hanging beside your bed, and the figure standing there.

It looked like you, but when Dark met the eyes of the person in the mirror, there wasn’t a single doubt in his mind who he was looking at.

The sound might have been inaudible through the glass, but their response was clear when the District Attorney saw they had his full, undivided attention:

“Finally.”

((End of Part 8. Thank you for reading! “Pits, Pendulums, Possibilities”... probably won’t be coming to a channel near you, for so many legal reasons.

And here’s a link to the next part, Part 9: Storm Warning.

Tagging: @silver-owl413 @skyewardlight @withjust-a-bite @blackaquokat @catgirlwarrior @neverisadork @luna1350 @oh-so-creepy @purpstraw @weirdfoxalley @95fangirl @lilalovesinternet-l @thepoolofthedead @a-bit-dapper @randomartdudette @geekymushroom @cactipresident @hotcocoachia @purple-anxiety-blog @shyinspiredartist @avispate ))

#markiplier #fanfic #darkiplier #wilford warfstache #bim trimmer #googliplier #eric derekson #yandereplier #wkm district attorney #dark laughter #The storm is finally here #It's time to face your fear #Mirror mirror on the wall #Do you really think you can save them all?

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lovemesomesurveys · 5 years

Text

What’s your hair like? A mess. It’s long, wavy, and a mix of my natural dark brown hair and the red that I dye it because it’s been several months since I’ve gotten my hair done and my roots are very overgrown. It also needs a trim. Is there someone you can’t help but stare at? Alexander Skarsgard. How do you feel about teenagers claiming to be in love? It’s hard for me to understand because I can’t imagine feeling that at such a young age and I kind of feel like it’s easy to get caught up in the emotions and lust due to hormones, and I wonder if they know what it really means, but who am I to say what they feel? To them it’s real, they’re the ones feeling it. Plus, I’m almost 30 and I’m not sure I even really know what it means or if I’ve ever actually been in love. I thought so, but I’m not so sure now. Are you dating anyone? If so, for how long? No. Do you believe in long distance relationships? They work for some people. I’ve never had one.

Do you have unlimited texting? Yes, even though I hardly ever text. What’s your favorite button on the keyboard? All the ones I use. Do you like your handwriting? No, it’s awful. Your biggest fear? Losing my loved ones, dying, never amounting to anything or never doing anything with my life, things getting worse or never getting better... What’s on your walls? Some posters/paintings and decals. Do you like perfume? Yeah, some. Are you a guy or a girl? Girl. Do you prefer to have girls as friends or guys? I don’t really have a preference. If we vibe, we vibe. What’s the top thing you look for in a S.O.? Someone who is patient, understanding, caring, and kind are especially important to me. Last words you heard and from who? My mom saying “goodnight.” Why do people cheat on each other? There’s a variety of reasons.

What’s your favorite brand of pencil? I don’t have one. Do you wake up by an alarm clock? If so, isn’t the BEEEEEP annoying? Yes, but it’s not a “BEEEEEP”, it’s something I chose from the options on my phone. It’s like an instrumental song type one. The last song you listened to? I have Señorita by Shawn Mendes and Camilla Cabello stuck in my head. The person you go to for advice? If anyone, my mom. Are you one of those people who just HAS to vent to somebody in some form? No. I don’t like doing that with people. I hate burdening others with my stuff and unloading on them, so I don’t do it much. I save that mostly for surveys and Twitter. Do you have Myspace, facebook, and myyearbook? I have all 3, but only my Facebook is active. I haven’t used Myspace or myyearbook in like 10 years, myyearbook even longer, but my account still exists out there. I don’t recal using myyearbook much, I think I just signed up to check it out. How do you feel about avril lavigne? I like some of her songs. I haven’t listened to her music in awhile, though. I wonder what happened to her. Don’t you hate it when people don’t say your name right? Nah. Now and then someone will mispronounce my last name, which I don’t understand, but I don’t hate it. It rarely happens. Have you heard of Paramore? If not, look them up. :) Yes, I’ve known of them for years. I actually saw them in concert once as well. Who’s your favorite sibling? I don’t like choosing favorites when it comes to family members. I’m closer to my younger brother. Favorite Parent? I’m closer to my mom. What do you want to do for a living? I don’t know. :/

Do you know anyone with down syndrome? No. Does anyone you know have a birthday this week? Mine is tomorrow. What do you think of the middle name ‘Jane’? I don’t think anything about it. What’s your favorite name in the opposite gender? Alexander. Can you keep eye contact with everyone? I find it awkward to hold it too long at once, like I’ll look away for a bit and then look back and so on. What color are your eyes? Brown. Do you curl or straighten your hair? It’s been like 3 years at least since I last straightened my hair myself. When I get my hair done my hair stylist straightens it, but it’s been almost a year since I got my hair done. :X Pro-life or pro-choice? Why? What shape is your favorite bowl? Bowl shape? Did you know the Salvation army was a church, too? I think I’ve heard that before. I hate winter. What’s your least favorite season? Ugh, SUMMER.

Do you know the difference between a hoodie and a jacket with a hood? A hoodie is more thin/lightweight. Do you belive in 'hating’ anyone? I don’t hate anyone. Do you like Twilight? I was really into it when the books were still coming out and then the movies, but I outgrew it. Do you know the difference between loving someone and being in love? Yes. I’m not in love with a family member, but I love them. What animal that is endangered is your favorite? Giraffes. :( How do you believe the Earth and life on it was created? God. What’s your religion? Christianity. How many fingers do you have? * 10 (dont u come @ me w that “”“thumbs”“” bullsh*t either, lmao. They'are ALL fingers) <<<< Hahah. I say the same thing. Don’t get all technical with me! What about toes? 10. Do you like your teeth? No. Do you need glasses or contacts? I wear glasses. Have you considered getting contacts that change your eyecolor? What color? It’s cool, but the idea of putting in contacts freaks me out. I also prefer wearing glasses anyway. Do you have allergies? Yes. Have you ever made a quiz? Don’t you love it when you’re on a roll? Once, a long time ago. Like pre-Tumblr days. What time zone are you in? Pacific. Do you wish you lived some where else? Yes. Sometimes don’t you wish you could move away and start over? Yes, but unfortunately my problems would follow me. It would be nice to live somewhere else, though. I hate this city. What’s the craziest color you’ve seen on a house? I’ve seen pink, yellow, purple, and blue houses. Do you like the name Trevor? Eh. How do you pronounce Bzoink? Biz-oink. Is Taylor Swift better than the rest of the teen singers? I’m not a fan of Taylor Swift. What time will it be in 3 hours and 2 minutes? 7:14AM. What’s your favorite brand of cereal? General Mills, Kellogs, and Post. Do you like to read? Yes. What’s your GPA? I’m doneeee with school. Isn’t annoying when you’re friends are different around different people? Depends on how they’re being different. I did have a friend who was completely different and not in a good way. Do you want a phone with a keyboard? I have a touch screen phone. Do you go to church but you aren’t sure if you believe in God? I don’t go to church right now, but I do believe in God. What grade are you in? I’m done with school, remember? Are you shorter then most of your friends? Yes, all of them. Do you prefer a S.O. older or younger? By how much? A bit older. Like up to 5 years at most, I’d say. I just feel like the older I get; though, the harder it’ll be to find someone. I’m almost 30, but I feel so...stunted and behind in life. Someone in their mid 30s would likely be in a much different place in life and be further ahead. I don’t know if they’d want to date me with where I am in life. Do you like popcorn? I love movie theater buttered popcorn. I also love this garlic parm seasoning I get put on it at this one theater we go to. SO good. Why does corn get chewed up but come out in the original form? Ew. Are you pessimistic or optimistic? Very pessimistic. What number do you think you’re on? I’m not counting. That was # 76. What’s your bestie’s name? Was it really? Wow. Anyway, her name is Yolanda. What size shoe do you wear? 6 in women’s. Do you like lollipops? Nah. Don’t you hate the texture of lotion on your skin? No. Well, unless it’s like greasy. Favorite movie? I have a lot. How many words per minute do you type? I don’t know. Do you think it’s possible to meet your bestie online? I don’t have a bestie online. Do you blog or write in a journal? This is my blog and journal. Isn’t health class annoying? I didn’t find it annoying. Who’s your favorite teacher, if any? What internet browser do you use? Chrome. Isn’t it weird to like having butterflies? No? The good butterfly feeling is nice, like the kind you get when you’re excited or you like someone. What’s the longest flower name you can think of? *shrug* What year were you born in? 1989. What time is it, backwards? 91:4. If you had to shorten your name to 4 letters, what would it be? Step. Sam; a femine name or a male name? Whatever. What’s the prettiest cat you have seen? All the cats I’ve ever seen.

#personal #text #survey #surveys

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punkscowardschampions · 5 years

Text

Jimmy & Janis

Jimmy: I'm not at work Jimmy: if you were gonna come in and be #goals Janis: weren't Janis: but tah for heads-up Jimmy: 👍 Janis: do you know 'bout my fave barista or should I roll the dice Jimmy: he's covering for me Janis: oh good Janis: 💕 Jimmy: can't say I never do owt for you, mate Janis: don't cash the IOU yet Jimmy: why? Jimmy: I get it, you look as rough as I feel but Pete ain't that shallow 💕 Janis: fuck off Janis: I'm great Jimmy: bollocks Janis: am too Janis: been for my run and everything Janis: I can handle mine, like Jimmy: fake it for the 'gram, my dear, I don't need to hear it, like Janis: later then skiver Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: I've got two kids hanging round my neck, what are you doing? Janis: no concern of yours Janis: check the socials if you're so interested Jimmy: you'll be grooming your horse or counting your cash, no need Jimmy: and now making yourself look #🔥 for the CG Janis: wow, you know me so well Janis: #flex when it counts Jimmy: [does like a cringey tweet for her or something] Jimmy: there Janis: 👏 Janis: sound cover it for today Jimmy: 👌 Janis: if you see a purse can you chuck it back to me Jimmy: after I've taken all the cash out, yeah Janis: 👑 don't carry cash Janis: it's got my gym card in it though so, if you do find it Jimmy: guess I'm working out today too then 💪🏆 tah Janis: welcome Jimmy: [a moment cos he's looking for it genuinely] Jimmy: where do you want me to bring it? Janis: oh good Janis: you at work tomorrow Jimmy: Can't pull a sickie every day, can I? Jimmy: not cancer riddled yet Janis: cheery Janis: don't bother getting out your sickbed Janis: just give it to grace Jimmy: how's that gonna look? Jimmy: you're already not babysitting with me right now 💔 Janis: 🙄 Janis: fine I'll come get it tomorrow then Jimmy: or meet me at the park by mine, get it, pose a bit and pretend you're with me today Janis: not really in the mood Janis: hungover or nah Jimmy: fake it Janis: that's precisely what I'm not in the mood for Janis: I ain't at home, just say I'm there Jimmy: hang on, I'll just photoshop you in Jimmy: won't be suss Janis: we don't need to be together 24/7 Janis: only that lot are that highkey Jimmy: you wanted highkey, mate Jimmy: and I just put my hand down the back of a fucking minging sofa for you, top that Janis: nah, that was definitely you Janis: 💕 Jimmy: leave it out Jimmy: on it with your lies this morning, you Jimmy: just what I look for in a lass that 😍😍 Janis: bitch what lie, where Janis: highkey for highkey was 100% your line Jimmy: you said some shit about appealing to our audience first Jimmy: and that you didn't wanna scale it back so there's your lie, Jenna Janis: whatever Janis: I'm busy right now Janis: maybe I'll come by later Jimmy: I won't be walking the dog later, I'll be walking her in a bit Jimmy: gonna knock and run instead though Jimmy: 🙄 Janis: fuck sake Janis: be there then Janis: not hanging about Jimmy: and I am? the shit you've gotta do ain't more important than mine, girl Janis: how'd you know Janis: not a competition anyway Jimmy: that'd be a first Janis: ha ha Janis: stop mucking about Janis: can you be there in 20? Jimmy: can you? Janis: obviously Jimmy: 👍 Janis: try and look like you're not dying Jimmy: late nights are #goals Jimmy: keep up Janis: if you leave out all actual details Janis: sure Jimmy: weren't gonna tweet 'em all out Janis: have you checked what you did put out Janis: always got to take back the bootycalls and texts to your ex before the PM Jimmy: I deleted my ex's number ages ago, we're all set Jimmy: only got the 1 Janis: 👍 Jimmy: in a bit then Janis: toodles my love Jimmy: 🤢 Janis: it's alright Janis: not gonna tell your manager on you when I'm there Jimmy: You'd have to run into him first Jimmy: even for an athlete like you, that's a challenge too far Janis: #officebants Janis: save it for Pete Jimmy: giving you a freebie to woo him with Jimmy: welcome Janis: if you knew how, you would've already Jimmy: might've done, how would you know? Jimmy: gotta keep it off the socials for your sake Janis: 😂 Janis: you think you'd be better at faking it by now Jimmy: oh you've got complaints, eh? Jimmy: go on Janis: don't you have an official procedure to follow Janis: another question to ask Jimmy: not on the clock, babe Janis: 'course Janis: so sick Janis: poor boy Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Jimmy: I'll live Janis: wow, way to ruin my day Janis: 💔 Jimmy: too soon to start posting vent statuses probably Jimmy: poor little rich girl Janis: I'll deal with getting consoled on the low, like Jimmy: 👍 Janis: you gotta bring the kids or Jimmy: or what, lock 'em in? Janis: I dunno, your sister ain't that young is she Jimmy: she's not coming Janis: okay Janis: well I won't keep you Jimmy: I'm on the dog's 💩 schedule not yours Janis: yeah but you know what I mean Jimmy: you're busy, you don't need to kill your horse to flog it, Jasmine Jimmy: point made Janis: if you like Jimmy: how? Janis: how? Jimmy: how are my likes owt to do with it? Janis: well that ain't what I meant so it must suit you at the very least Jimmy: what did you mean? Janis: that I ain't gonna hang 'round and cause drama Janis: I remember waking him up last night, like Jimmy: he's got swings and a slide and climbing frame, on top of a puppy to chase, he's not gonna give a shit about me or you Jimmy: my sister's the one being dramatic and as I said, she ain't coming Janis: well either way Janis: I shouldn't have come back, like so Jimmy: you didn't stay, it don't matter Janis: I know that ain't how it works Janis: got enough inconsiderate older brothers and sisters, like Jimmy: how it works is I was back later than I said Jimmy: nowt to do with you Janis: literally untrue Jimmy: you were there, don't mean you get it Jimmy: no need to unlock my family dynamics Janis: ain't trying or planning to Janis: I kept you out late and I'm trying to say soz so take it Jimmy: like you forced me, piss off Janis: didn't mean to get you in trouble with your boss, like Jimmy: you didn't Janis: sounds like it Jimmy: where you getting that from? Janis: she's giving you the 🥶 out Jimmy: she's giving me the 🖕 Jimmy: used to that Janis: 🎻 Janis: alright then, I'm here early Janis: gonna do some laps, text when you're here or something Jimmy: [appears not long after like oh hey but not texting cos can't be tamed] Janis: [when you're shook again but hide it like boy, putting your hand out like purse please] Jimmy: [chucks it at her obvs which makes Twix a little bit wild] Janis: [meet cute with the dog lmao, also saying hello to Bobby 'cos you aren't that rude] Jimmy: [when Bobby ain't saying hello back cos shy egg but Twix is friendly enough for everyone] Janis: [not gonna take it personal, like, even if this is so awks now, takes a few snaps of Twix and turns to him like yay or nay?] Jimmy: [takes some pics of her and Twix in response cos nothing fake about that love or cuteness and it's a good delaying tactic before you have to pose with the bae yourself] Janis: [takes him his messy self and is 😏 but can't be properly smug 'cos feeling it too] Janis: in* Jimmy: [he's literally 😎 but grumpier lol then he has to let Bobby take some pics cos the boy wanna do whatever he does like bear with bae] Janis: [when that's shamelessly cute so you just chill on a bench nearby, giving love to Twix when she comes 'round Jimmy: [when you go sit on a swing so your brother will but you gotta beckon her over to sit on it with you for the pics and it's gonna be so awks bye] Janis: [when you just have to commit to it 'cos overcompensate always] Jimmy: [taking so many pics and vids for the different angles honey] Janis: [when you're still looking #goals oh lads, as if you're not dying at having to be sat on him rn] Jimmy: [when he's likewise dying at her being on his lap though #don'tletherseedon'tletherknow] Janis: [you do not need this many pictures, hop off] Jimmy: [when you then spend 3x as long as it takes to go through 'em deleting etc cos the awks] Janis: send me any decent ones Jimmy: [does] Janis: tah Jimmy: 💕 Janis: have fun Jimmy: without you, never, baby 😘 Janis: [does lil lol as she's slowly walking away like okay then, but Twix keeps following so it's taking a while] Janis: come get your dog Jimmy: take it with you Janis: don't be mean Janis: it's adorable Jimmy: have it then Janis: the kid don't hate me yet, don't throw me under the bus as a 🐶napper Jimmy: he ain't noticed, on you go Janis: he will do Janis: you just want me to walk it, yeah Jimmy: Keep it Jimmy: what could be more #goals? Janis: we need to buy one together and have a custody battle Jimmy: alright Jimmy: let's go adopt a new 🐶 Janis: what breed Jimmy: what's #trending? Jimmy: leave this one tied to the roundabout, hang on Janis: not with your brother Janis: get rspca and social on you Jimmy: I'll send him home Jimmy: note pinned to his coat, like Janis: actually 💔 Jimmy: don't cry, you'll get a headache Janis: so comforting Janis: #baeoftheyear Jimmy: 🥇 or nowt darling Janis: I've had my vitamin c already Janis: but we can pretend you hit me with a smoothie of 💕 Janis: ew Jimmy: do you genuinely have a vomit kink or what? Jimmy: getting me close, girl 🤢🤢🤢 Jimmy: trying to put me off my 🍕 before I've ordered it Jimmy: Mia would be proud Janis: hot Janis: 😬 I didn't think that sentence through leave me alone Janis: I'm not on top form rn Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: knew you were wrecked too Janis: not as much as you, boy Jimmy: I drank more than you, lightweight Janis: yeah, 'cos you stole it Janis: wanker Jimmy: you stole my jacket, I didn't wanna freeze to death Janis: I did not Janis: you wouldn't take it back Jimmy: don't sound like me, that Janis: I remember being gutted it WAS you, trust me Jimmy: 💔💔💔 Janis: I know Janis: heartless, me Jimmy: You wanna fill that hole with pizza or keep flirting with me? Janis: 'scuse me Jimmy: it's an easy question Jimmy: how many braincells did you 💀💀💀 last night, pisshead? Janis: sounded sordid Janis: I was just wondering if #kinkunlocked Jimmy: Are you hungry or not? You know I'm a feeder Janis: Yeah, I could eat Jimmy: so come on back to the house of fun Janis: sure Jimmy: [rounding up dogs and kids like but Bobby's in a mood cos he wanna stay so Jimmy's like FINE I'll get it delivered to the park ffs so then he gotta text Cass to get her to come over lol] Janis: [moves closer to 'em again, sits on said roundabout Jimmy: [sits with her obvs when you lowkey lying there cos you feel crap] Janis: [popping out some painkillers like here boy] Jimmy: [when you dry swallow cos you ain't got a drink & then stick your tongue out to show her they gone cos you a nerd] Janis: [pat his head like he's a dog] Jimmy: [letting it happen] Janis: [pushing back his fringe 'cos sweaty forehead] Jimmy: [thank god he's got his shades on so he can look at her & she doesn't need to know that he isn't a grumpy boy in that moment] Janis: [when Bobby wants to be pushed so she's like is it okay if I do it 'cos Jimmy is in no fit state lol and Bobby is like okay 'cos just wants to be pushed and she ain't up in his face] Jimmy: [you know he's gonna be snapping sneaky pics of them cos cute. Also I like to imagine Twix annoying him as he's tryna chill lol] Janis: [just loling to herself 'cos also cute] Janis: probably go sleep on something that doesn't spin 'round and 'round, babe Jimmy: I'm not going to sleep, I'm 💀💀💀ing tah very much Jimmy: show some respect all of you Janis: 😂 Janis: I'll save the kind words and tears for when you gone Janis: gotta fake it 'til the end Jimmy: 😍😍😍 Jimmy: what do you wanna eat? pizza faves weren't on our couples questionnaire Janis: anything hot, anything with meat on Janis: I'm easy tbh Jimmy: 😏 Janis: Oh, shut up Jimmy: or what? Janis: or I'll come give you a push Jimmy: so fierce you 🐅 Janis: better hope you never find out, boy Janis: 👊 Jimmy: 😱😱😱 Jimmy: [a wild Cass appears and ignores everyone but Twix cos mad about last night still] Jimmy: you've got competition now, mate Janis: nah, you're on your own Janis: 🤷 soz Jimmy: 💔💔 Janis: got enough sisters of my own to deal with without taking on yours Janis: you'll need to fake marry a bitch for that level of service Jimmy: swap you Gracie, she likes me Jimmy: [goes to talk to Cass and she shouts at him as is their standard, really helping that headache] Janis: happily Janis: beats crying Jimmy: 👍 Janis: [Keeping Bobby busy running 'round the park like a crazy person] Jimmy: [if this weren't awks before thanks Cass just don't smack him his fake gf don't need to see that before she's even met you] Janis: she'll cheer up when pizza gets here Janis: all been hangry Jimmy: subtle hint that, Judith Janis: I'm being lovely, fuck off Jimmy: not to me Janis: you really gonna push a child off the swing to have a go Janis: not #goals mate, not #goals at all Jimmy: you really gonna let my sister think my girlfriend don't like me Jimmy: #savage Janis: Yeah, what she needs right now is some PDA Janis: love me for that, like Jimmy: you leapt to that, mate Jimmy: lads and lasses can talk you know Janis: You know I don't talk Janis: we been over this Janis: #specialsnowflakesyouandme Jimmy: we've been over this, you have to fake it Jimmy: I get that you really wanna kiss me but everything else Janis: 😒 Janis: you really want another woman in your face rn, fine Janis: [comes over like hey] Jimmy: [drags her far enough away that they can 🚬 without being around kids or dogs] Janis: [grateful for the break but also more awks 'cos just them again] Jimmy: [smoking in awkward silence such fun lads] Janis: [taps his head, not roughly, like, how're you doing now?] Jimmy: [shrugs because v helpful always] Janis: ['good talk' like ain't that what we're meant to be doing lmao] Jimmy: ['you don't wanna' like here's your out for a sec, take it] Janis: [goes to shake head but turns it into a shrug] Jimmy: [on his phone like an antisocial bitch] Janis: [when you're bouncing your legs up and down 'cos can't sit still at the best of times, just keeping an eye out for the pizza hardcore] Jimmy: [meanwhile you just straight up sit on the floor cos you realise you don't need to be standing rn] Janis: [Twix gonna jump you boy] Jimmy: [when you're like come here cos you don't want the dog in your grill so the bae MUST sit on you instead, that's just logical and nbd] Janis: [when you look at him like really?] Jimmy: [ just lifting your shades so you can look at her like come on] Janis: [does and gives him a look like 'I hate you so much' but when it's also a LOOK] Jimmy: [is 😏 but when she's sitting with her he's just touching her in the SOFTEST ways like playing with her hair & so lightly tracing her skin with a fingertip that you might think it's a bug or something lol cos tired af since he barely slept and is the softest boy] Janis: [when there's no faking that you ain't about it 'cos you have never felt anything on this level of soft so you don't know how you're meant to be so you're like help] Jimmy: [when you're then just leaning on her so its lowkey snuggling] Janis: [when you literally say 'what the fuck' but quietly and with feeling] Jimmy: [when you don't say anything cos what can you tbh] Janis: [gotta have that pizza show up to cockblock] Jimmy: [just casually gonna go eat pizza with the fam like that didn't happen okay boy] Janis: [when you're just there like do I stay or do I go] Jimmy: [when you literally handhold her over to the fam like eat your pizza but obvs its so fake bye] Janis: [palm a couple of slices and yeet babe like g2g bye] Jimmy: [Twix is 💔 we're all 💔] Janis: [give her some sneaky pizza kids] Jimmy: [nomming the crusts like a Roo] Janis: [getting tooty] Jimmy: [well that was awkward, thanks so much Jimothy] Janis: [later like early PM] Janis: I need a favour Jimmy: ? Janis: doesn't matter if I can't come over/you can't come out but just meet me for obligatory selfies to prove we're together Jimmy: where? Janis: doesn't matter, can be a #datenight or #cosynightinwithbae but gimme fake plans to get me out of real & unwanted ones Jimmy: alright Jimmy: come here then Janis: you home now? Jimmy: I'm not gonna send you somewhere I ain't, am I? Janis: alright smartarse Janis: was being courteous Janis: be there in fucking forever 'cos gotta get the bus in Jimmy: I just got out the shower if you need details, like Jimmy: you want me to meet you somewhere else? Janis: I did not need to know but I'll get the 😍 on then, tah Janis: nah, it's fine, got to get out this house anyway, wherever I'm going Jimmy: 👌 Jimmy: Tell Mia I missed her today before you go if she's there #obvs Janis: how did you know Janis: but get to fuck Janis: she's being avoided #obvs Jimmy: 💔💔 Jimmy: How did I recognise an #obvs SOS or the #obvs cause when I heard it? Janis: yeah well it's all your fault so you should be more ready to help Janis: #letdown tbh Jimmy: what have I done? Janis: they wouldn't be strongarming me into a sleepover if you weren't a thing Janis: but you can be my excuse too so do me a solid and make it good Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Jimmy: you're v loved babe and you were before I took the job on Janis: oh yeah, so loved Janis: no doubt end up getting waterboarded for info Janis: #justgirlythings Jimmy: 😂 Janis: it is not funny 😡 Jimmy: a bit Janis: 😑 Janis: swap places with me then Janis: sure they'd welcome that just as much Jimmy: if I wanted an orgy with 'em it'd have happened before now Janis: 🤢 Janis: literally shut up Jimmy: you should've got me to pick you up Janis: in what Janis: your sportscar Jimmy: 🖕 Janis: I've got the 🐎 don't I Jimmy: might've turned it to glue Jimmy: party animal you are Janis: is that what you're thinking then Janis: party? Jimmy: what are you wearing? Janis: 😏 the creep makes a return Janis: wys I should be wearing Janis: bus ain't even here yet so Jimmy: Look down, girl, are you night in ready or night out ready? Janis: I dunno, obviously I've not rolled out club-ready like a nutter Jimmy: stop pissing about and send me a picture 🙄 Janis: ffs alright! Jimmy: ⏲ Janis: [snap] Jimmy: fuck it, let's go out Janis: yeah? Janis: okay Jimmy: a knobhead from work is having people round, I weren't gonna bother but Ian's just got in Jimmy: don't wanna double with him and his missus Janis: definitely not Janis: nothing goals in that Janis: works for me Janis: not such a knobhead he'll have a dresscode, yeah? Jimmy: hot girls get to ignore dresscodes, how don't you know that? Janis: I would've probably put jeans on still Janis: what happens when you're forced from your own home without warning Jimmy: he wears shorts all year round, don't worry, like Janis: not got the legs for it Janis: I understand Jimmy: I'll dress the same as you mate, make it a #mood Jimmy: we're just one of them couples Janis: ha, if I use the # twinning not in reference to her, gracie will deffo cry Janis: worth it just for that Jimmy: there you go then Janis: 💕 Jimmy: I'm going shop so we ain't empty handed, what do you want? Janis: can't be THAT couple Janis: you want me to tell you I'm easy again 'cos Janis: not fussed Jimmy: my mum would cry, didn't drag me up like that 🙄 Jimmy: 😏😏😏 Janis: such a 💔breaker you Janis: but really, just get more of whatever you want and that'll be fine, I'll get you back when I get there Jimmy: yeah yeah Jimmy: no need to flex rich girl Jimmy: you're a cheap date Jimmy: didn't even stay for icecream or owt earlier Janis: so I'm cheap and easy Janis: yeah, keep digging, like 😏 Jimmy: 😍😍😍🤤🤤🤤 Jimmy: have you not got a jacket or were you just #posing 'cause you're a massive flirt? Janis: why would I need a jacket when you're handing yours away like a philanthropic chippendale Janis: how dare you imply I was implying anything, also Jimmy: I can't even read them words Jimmy: too northern for that shit tah Jimmy: I'll just grab you one #OMG #soannoying Jimmy: how dare you flirt with me so openly, anyone'd reckon that's what snapchat was invented for or something Janis: Chippendales are SO northern, shut up Janis: I've done my research, I take this seriously, tah Janis: you know, too much nip for Insta, could post it on twitter if you're feeling too special rn Jimmy: I didn't get that far the word before it was well big and tripped me over Jimmy: as for my research the 🐶 ate it, soz Janis: Cute but disappointing Janis: if I was to give you a yelp review Jimmy: she is Jimmy: get used to that Janis: omg Janis: so mean Jimmy: 🐶💔 Janis: We're gonna make a club Janis: get jackets that ain't yours Jimmy: you're so fake Jimmy: couldn't do one fast enough from her before Janis: oh yeah, that's deffo what that was Jimmy: ain't stopped crying 'bout it, the poor pup Jimmy: 🎻🎻 Janis: again, your fault Janis: and you ain't even sorry Janis: poor, poor pup Jimmy: I only take the blame for shit I ain't done for my real girlfriends Janis: plural now Jimmy: past and future, duh Janis: duh indeed Janis: hopeful Janis: it's cute Jimmy: say what you really think, Janet Janis: always do Jimmy: [sends her pic of his outfit] Jimmy: Go on then Janis: I mean Janis: not as good as me but you'll do Jimmy: 💕 Janis: 🍻🤞 Jimmy: don't let me get as wrecked Jimmy: If I have to call in sick tomorrow an' all, you'll have to pay me Janis: So I'm babysitter Janis: alright Janis: easy Jimmy: I've done it all day, swapsies Janis: not me Jimmy: could've if you'd been here Janis: you reckon Janis: last I remember you was about half 💀💀💀 Jimmy: you're calling yourself high maintenance now? Jimmy: easy a bit ago Janis: just saying Janis: you needed looking after more than me Jimmy: leave it out Janis: why Jimmy: why not be a massive dickhead? Jimmy: up to you that Janis: you wanna play nice? Janis: n'awh Jimmy: you're the one asking me for a favour Jimmy: so you do Janis: nah Janis: I asked for a photo, that's all Jimmy: stop being a twat Janis: charming Jimmy: you just said you don't want that Janis: you're very, very annoying Jimmy: 💔💔💔 Janis: but I'm on the bus Jimmy: congrats, mate Jimmy: I know it's beneath you 👑 Janis: piss off Janis: I spend half my life on this fucking bus Jimmy: shouldn't have done your 🐎 in Janis: s'what happens when I'm done w you Jimmy: 🎻🎻🎻 Janis: got my headphones but thank you Janis: efforts are always appreciated, boy Jimmy: 😘 don't mention it, babe Jimmy: anything for you obvs Janis: too kind Jimmy: 💕 Jimmy: let me know when you're about then Janis: yeah 'course Janis: it's about half an hour so Jimmy: 👍 Janis: damn Janis: how haven't I asked Janis: is my fave barista gonna be there or what Jimmy: ??? Jimmy: man of mystery him Janis: how irritating yet attractive of him Jimmy: I keep telling you, slide into his DMs, girl Jimmy: sort it out Janis: not right now Janis: biding my time Jimmy: probably got a gig anyway 🤩🤩 Janis: exactly Jimmy: if I had anywhere else better to be Janis: what you gonna do eh Jimmy: 🎻💔 Janis: gutted Jimmy: give us a chance to get in the door before you leave your review Jimmy: bit rude shouting it from a bus window Janis: that's me Janis: got money but no manners Jimmy: #kinkunlocked Janis: 😏 what mine or yours Janis: #transparent Jimmy: weren't speaking for you Jimmy: we ain't that couple Janis: 😶😶 Janis: that couple Jimmy: 😂 Janis: Jimmy Jimmy: What? Janis: how much of last night do you remember Janis: 'cos my memory is a bit fucked Jimmy: after I lifted that bottle, I dunno, why? Jimmy: Does it matter? Janis: probably not, no Janis: just Janis: idk Jimmy: Just? Janis: It ain't my usual thing Janis: losing massive chunks of time like that Jimmy: doing shots ain't my usual thing, is it yours? Janis: no Jimmy: none tonight then Janis: not for you, anyway Janis: I don't need to work 💰💸🍀 Jimmy: you ain't doing 'em without me, you dickhead Janis: 😂 Janis: fine Janis: be doubly entertaining then Jimmy: 1. full time job holding all that hair back tah and I'm on the clock enough Jimmy: 2. piss off I'm the CG's top employee so goes without saying life and soul of this party Janis: 1. I could put it up, IF I was going to vom but that's so unlikely it's almost an impossibility so Janis: 2. I don't work there so your shop bants will have no effect on me and I'm the one you're trying to please here Jimmy: 1. your kink is so blatant shut up oh my god Jimmy: 2. you'll be pleased by all the drinks I just bought #easy Janis: 1. 😑 Janis: 2. 😑 Janis: do you wanna get me drunk or nah, make up your mind, lad Jimmy: Baby, don't be expressionless, it's 💔 Janis: [pulls stupid face to send him] Janis: ❤🔫 Jimmy: my heart has grown back! and loads of sizes 😍 Janis: #humblebrag Jimmy: send that tweet Janis: ❤ or 🍆 lads, you decide Janis: I'll start a poll Jimmy: 👍 Jimmy: Why did you fuck off last night, is that in the black hole or what? Janis: I can't remember exactly Janis: just weird fragments that don't quite fit together like I've got it secondhand or something Jimmy: go on Janis: it don't make any sense Janis: but like you said, doubt it matters Jimmy: probably not Janis: I am p sure it weren't 'cos we woke any of your fam up or something so Janis: so don't need to worry Jimmy: that was before and only our kid Jimmy: he always wakes up when I come back Jimmy: if he was even asleep Janis: yeah, I remember that too Janis: did you get him to sleep in the end Jimmy: 🤔🤔 Janis: what? Jimmy: did I get water? If he let me do that I must've Janis: Yeah Janis: 'cos you scared the shit out of me Jimmy: Did I? 😂 Janis: I thought that was earlier but no, yeah Janis: definitely on the sofa Janis: softer than the park Jimmy: You scared me earlier Jimmy: that's why Janis: did I? Jimmy: I was walking and you showed up like 👻🔪🔪 Janis: how mean Janis: sounds legit, I believe you Jimmy: well creepy that was Jimmy: tah Janis: you're the creeper Jimmy: leave that right out Janis: didn't say I hated it Jimmy: didn't say you liked it Janis: what's it to you Jimmy: nowt Janis: 😏 Janis: there we go then Jimmy: what kind of picture do you need? Janis: just one to prove we're somewhere doing something Janis: I was purposely vague about our plans in case you were already out or something Jimmy: 👌 Janis: no way I was sleeping in a room with Mia in Janis: actually end up 👻 Jimmy: you can stay at mine if you want, she'll probably use your pillow for black magic Jimmy: or spooning Jimmy: bit rude of us not to lend her a sharpie so she could draw your face on Jimmy: turn the bus around like Janis: 😂 Janis: don't, it's too real and it makes me feel uncomfortable Janis: defs looking for hair and fingernails as we speak Jimmy: How haven't I drawn you and sold it to her for 💰💰💰💰 Jimmy: going soft me Janis: always on the clock, babe Janis: it'll kill your creativity/soul Janis: 💁 Jimmy: I bet you real cash she'd eat it 🐍 Jimmy: what are the calories of paper and pencil? Janis: anything over negative is too high, but she'd get the pleasure of puking me up that way so Janis: it's a must Jimmy: can't compete with such romance, fuck me 💕 Janis: well she gets to fuck everyone so only fair Jimmy: not me Jimmy: or you Janis: ❄❄ Jimmy: your sister 100% Janis: 🤢 Janis: disgusting Jimmy: trying to get you to vom 'cause you're so into it and I'm that kind of boyfriend 🤞 Janis: 😍😍😍 Janis: easier ways, I'm sure Janis: but know you're an 🎨 Jimmy: alright, challenge accepted Jimmy: 💘 Janis: no shots, remember Jimmy: nowts a shot unless it's in a shot glass Janis: yeah, that's how that works Janis: 😏 Jimmy: means I have everything to play with and more space to mix it Janis: oh god Jimmy: bigger measures for you to down too Janis: I'm babysitting you, remember Jimmy: You just might die trying though, Juliet Janis: behave Jimmy: or what? Janis: find out Jimmy: alright Janis: alright Jimmy: is your bus anywhere near yet, it's fucking miserable out here Janis: you don't wanna wait inside Jimmy: weren't given the nod for that one Jimmy: Ian threw his weight about and me out Jimmy: earnt himself some 😍😍😍 Janis: Gross Janis: wtf Jimmy: 🎻 and 🤢 Janis: well, we ain't that far Janis: you should get a head start on the drinks if you ain't Jimmy: 👍 Janis: is he gonna let you back in later Janis: you could come back to mine but you would have to pretend to have crazy hot sex with me if the coven is still lurking so Jimmy: 😂 Jimmy: Cass'll post a key through Janis: 👍 Janis: gotta stick together vs the 'rents Jimmy: we can't be as late back though Janis: yeah Janis: whenever's fine Jimmy: you're easy, I get it Janis: shut up 😏 Janis: the favour is the alibi, anything else is just extra Jimmy: most of my wage is tips, I'm gonna keep you out all night now Jimmy: habit Janis: so above and beyond, babe 💕 Jimmy: 💰🐮💕 Jimmy: can you remember what we drew? should go check out the finished masterpiece #🎨 Jimmy: got a mental image of you sucking on the end of my sharpie there but otherwise nowt much Janis: Filth Janis: 😂 Janis: when we find out it's as intelligible as smeared shit on the walls, like but seemed like a masterpiece at the time Jimmy: when you reckon its 🥇 but it ain't even 🥉 Jimmy: #tragic Janis: hopefully we didn't sign it 😱 Jimmy: shit I probably did do! Jimmy: cut my hand off instead of my ear so I can't be that dickhead Jimmy: still post it to you though 💌 Janis: this country ain't quite THAT religious Janis: but romantic Janis: I'll keep it in a jar Jimmy: I won't tell you I'm ambidextrous and it's another scam, that'll take the shine right off the gesture Jimmy: and that's witchcraft in the north if it ain't here Jimmy: gotta take the secret to my grave naturally Janis: you are SUCH a show-off Janis: but I'm left-handed so we can get burnt together Jimmy: don't be a HATER when I'm trusting you with my secrets Jimmy: obvs you are #evil twin Jimmy: so romantic though #datenight 🔥💕 Janis: it's just REALLY obvious you want me to ask what them hands do Jimmy: if you need to ask I'm not fake dating you hard enough Jimmy: the answer is obviously 🚬 and ✎ Janis: yeah yeah, I'll study when I need to Janis: you're easy too Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: I'm well hard 💪 Janis: 😏 Janis: mhmm Janis: if anyone asks Jimmy: you ran away from them questions mate Jimmy: 💀👑 will be in my DMs asking herself Janis: well excuse me for not sticking around to stroke your ego and quench their thirst Janis: not interested in either soz Jimmy: 💔💔 Janis: what better review than I gotta run to you soon as your mentioned? Janis: think on, boy Jimmy: 😏 Jimmy: I never said you were bad at this Janis: not directly anyway Janis: you can say I'm good, go on Jimmy: You're SO good baby 💕😍💘 Janis: 😂 Janis: 😩💦 Jimmy: 🤤🤤🤤 Janis: so in the party mood now Janis: and not a moment too soon, just pulling up, like Jimmy: [waves cos let's say he went there cos sick of sitting on his doorstep] Janis: [snaps a pic 'cos #goals and gets off the bus like 😏 'don't have to convince the driver how in love we are do we, 'cos I can run at you if you're feeling it?'] Jimmy: [throws a jacket at her cos always and a distraction from how much he'd love that] Janis: [when you appraise it like you've been really fashion and you're not sure but obvs you put it on with a grin and a 'tah'] Jimmy: [🙄 but a playful one so also 😏] Janis: ['can you lead the way this time or am I your personal satnav again?] Jimmy: [playfully dragging her off by the arm cos actually does know where he's going but gotta take her to the pub or something first anyway cos you can't show up this early] Janis: [lowkey happy nerds always] Jimmy: [throws her snacks he bought for her when he bought the drinks cos she didn't stay for much pizza and he don't know if she got to eat at hers before she ran away #considerate] Janis: ['#feeder' but nudges him like thanks and noms] Jimmy: [nudges her back and gives her his phone so she can reply to Mia again cos fave] Janis: [when you 🙄 but not playfully at her lack of shame lmao] Jimmy: [give it up gurl Grace fancied him anyways so #girlcode] Janis: [always hitting her with those exclusive selfies lol] Jimmy: [love that, going harder than you need to always] Janis: [shudders 'if you ever go there, actually got no respect for you' Jimmy: ['if I ever go there, kill me. Tah. Don't wanna live without my dick when it shrivels and falls off'] Janis: [lols and does a 💔 with her hands like poor baby 'I'll put you out of your misery, mate; what are friends for, after-all'] Jimmy: [nods his thanks and offers her a 🚬] Janis: [shakes her head but takes it okay gurl] Jimmy: [lights it for her as per before his own even cos pecking order] Janis: [tips her imaginary hat to him] Jimmy: [walking and smoking as standard] Janis: ['So, on a scale of manager to Pete, where does this one fall? Need to know how small to make my talk, like'] Jimmy: ['if manager Dave is 0, this lad is like a 2' does the 💔 with his hands like unlucky] Janis: [makes ott disappointed face 'damn, weather and sports it is, okay'] Jimmy: [makes an OTT pouty face to hide the fact he's actually jealous because in my head this lad is 'cute' but in like a really basic way haha] Janis: [pinches his cheeks like a grandmother] Jimmy: [playfight moment] Janis: [always a moment, don't mind them] Jimmy: [let her win though cos we know its real] Janis: [irl 💪] Jimmy: [dramatic bow down cos he's a nerd] Janis: ['you're welcome' 😏] Jimmy: [gives her a bottle of whatever like shhh] Janis: ['Slainte' and knocking it back 'cos start as you mean to go on] Jimmy: [giving her like a steady on kinda look but is 😏 for #bants not concern vibe cos can't say anything actually cos he's as bad we know] Janis: ['don't worry, I'll keep it from you' and not passing it and another swig with a grin 'cos best babysitter ever] Jimmy: [takes it cos gotta prove you're still 💪 and takes a swig with a cheeky wink and it's hotter than it needs to be thank you boy] Janis: [when you can't even be mad but you have a go at pretending still 'cos otherwise] Jimmy: [pass it back like love me again] Janis: [just having a time, don't mind them] Jimmy: [realistically how far can this pub be so enjoy yourselves in these streets while you can lads] Janis: [also where you putting these bottles lads] Jimmy: [let's hope he has some kind of bag with him for the unopened ones at least cos can't show up empty handed] Janis: [my boo is horrified lmao] Jimmy: [he had snacks too so he weren't carrying all that #justsayin] Janis: [you silly, also get a round in girl] Jimmy: [when this bit will probs be better than the party lbr] Janis: [ahh shit house parties, perfect bonding ground 😈] Jimmy: [we know you can make it look fun for the socials kids] Janis: [when she defs would've got him something and coke so she could pretend it was just coke for a hot sec lmao] Jimmy: [such a cute nerd move he'd have to lol] Janis: [when he's shamelessly got a cute laugh bye] Jimmy: [when you make her play darts or pool or whatever cos you lost the playfight and you wanna win] Janis: [always down for a competition] Jimmy: [but she should win again so he's a sulky bitch] Janis: come on, be my mate Janis: [kicking, but gently lol, under the table] Jimmy: [is 😒 and ignoring like hmmm just gonna drank and play with this beermat] Janis: [kicks a bit harder like oi] Janis: you're rude Jimmy: [gives her a look like what?] Jimmy: 🎻🎻 Janis: 😑 Janis: another one or Jimmy: 🍻 Janis: missed the please Janis: work on the thank you for when I'm back 👍 Janis: [goes] Jimmy: soz mum Janis: don't make it weird Jimmy: like she were in the room there then Jimmy: it was weird Janis: 😒 Janis: shut up Jimmy: it was rude a bit ago when I tried that Jimmy: make your mind up Janis: don't have to Janis: if I'm a mum I'm always right 'cos I say so Jimmy: if you're impersonating mine you ain't Janis: I'm not going method Janis: and if that's a #kinkunlocked I gotta go like Jimmy: piss off Jimmy: you're making it weirder than I went for Janis: then shh Jimmy: I get it, telling me what to do is one of yours Jimmy: I wouldn't have reckoned on you as that predictable but alright Janis: piss off Janis: I don't wanna be your mommy Jimmy: 👍 Janis: [come back with that drink huffily and just be on your phone] Jimmy: [down it cos that's the mood] Janis: [awks again] Jimmy: [gdi Jimothy you're always making the vibe off] Jimmy: [just on socials putting in that werk like you're love's young dream for her though cos as close to a sorry as we're getting rn is when its working and the fans are loving your efforts so bae's getting all the notifications] Janis: nice work Jimmy: [shrugs and goes to get more drinks like here's a real peace offering] Janis: [nods head like tah and does small smile but genuine] Jimmy: [when you can't help smiling back cos she's so cute bye] Janis: [just showing him all the highkey responses and loling] Jimmy: [take a moment to bond over how ridiculous everyone is like] Janis: [just like why do they care so much] Jimmy: [we know its cos you two walking around looking like models] Janis: [#hotcouplealert] Jimmy: [gotta do the jj love heart doodle everywhere they go soz to the tabletop but not] Janis: [snap that honey] Jimmy: [also take a moment to text Cass and make sure she's alright boy] Jimmy: [okay but Cass sending him a pic he drew of jj on the swing together cos she's like why are you gross but you upload that art to your insta because #fans] Jimmy: {Bobby drew it not Jimmy lol] Janis: ['He's so cute'] Jimmy: ['And talented. Made you look cute an' all' boy stop playing you think she's hot af] Janis: [makes 'oh please' noise, 'gives you a run for your money, deffo'] Jimmy: [kicks her like she did to him earlier but is 😏 not 😒] Janis: [squeezes his arm in a pisstakey supportive way like 'it'll be okay, babe'] Jimmy: [flicks some drink at her face like you did to me the other day] Janis: ['you want this whole drink on your head or what? but not actually mad 'cos always here for the flirty bants over awks any day] Jimmy: ['or what' because always gonna say that, giving her such a LOOK excuse you Jimothy you're too sober for this] Janis: [just a LOOK back] Jimmy: [when he just leans across the table and it's such a kiss moment but instead he wipes her face for her with the sleeve of whatever hoodie he has on but that's even more intimate so how dare you tbh] Janis: [when you're so 😳 you're like gotta go loo bye] Jimmy: [just shamelessly watch her go we all know it] Jimmy: get on a move on, we're going after Janis: alright, piss police Janis: I'm coming Jimmy: not a kink before you say it tah Janis: yeah, how defensive you were dead sold that one, mate 👍 Jimmy: 🖕 Jimmy: it's a bit of a fucking walk and you're the only one getting a boner for exercise round here, Julie Janis: I already knew you couldn't keep up, babe Janis: didn't need to admit it Janis: I'll go slow for you 💕 Janis: [comes out like ready] Jimmy: stay here and take it slow with the barman if you're gonna be a dickhead Jimmy: [is walking ahead like excuse you I'm so 💪] Janis: [hangs back like she's pondering but then shrugs and follows being loud like 'He's not my type so shoot your shot if you're feeling it'] Jimmy: [mimes a 🎻] Janis: ['Don't be sad, with no competition from me, you stand a chance now' encouraging 👍 up] Jimmy: [ignoring cos so mature] Janis: [walking annoyingly close to him like speeding up when he does and slowing down when he do like you can't ignore me boy] Jimmy: [🚬 without offering her one like yeah I can] Janis: [just a look and noise like wow, it be like that, yeah?] Jimmy: [does the dramatic look around like oh did I hear something cos nerd] Janis: ['I friggin' hate you, you know'] Jimmy: [gives her a bemused look cos no you don't] Janis: [snatches that 🚬 so rudely] Jimmy: [lights another for himself with an OTT sigh] Janis: ['what you being a dickhead for?'] Jimmy: ['what are you always trying to pimp me out for?'] Janis: ['you what?'] Jimmy: [I said, what are you always trying to pimp me out to the locals for? If I was #dtf I wouldn't be fake dating you, would I?'] Janis: ['Erm, obviously, it was a joke; if you needed or wanted a wingman, I ain't interested, trust'] Jimmy: ['so hilarious you'] Janis: ['Jesus, sorry, forget I said anything'] Jimmy: [shugs like consider my memory erased] Janis: [when you start walking ahead but only a bit 'cos you don't know where you're going so can't fully walk off, like] Jimmy: [when you obvs catch her up and are walking in step like you can't ignore me either this goes both ways] Janis: [the most exasperated look] Jimmy: ['what?' cos I must] Janis: ['Don't even'] Jimmy: [don't even what?' he's so annoying omg] Janis: ['Stop it, I swear to GOD'] Jimmy: [gives her a look that's stop what? cos not gonna say it but such a twat still] Janis: ['fuck this' under her breath and actual walking off] Jimmy: [not gonna let her so following 'what was it you said? be my mate, come on'] Janis: ['you don't wanna be mates' and looking ahead keeping walking] Jimmy: ['for someone who don't wanna be my mum you're about as determined to fuck off'] Janis: [just turning around like what but not actually saying it] Jimmy: ['you don't wanna go home and neither do I, so let's just go to the party, yeah?'] Janis: [shrugs 'whatever'] Jimmy: [drags her back in the right direction but really gently] Janis: ['this don't mean we're friends'] Jimmy: ['I don't wanna be friends with you' cos ain't that the truth] Janis: [just trying not to look so hurt] Jimmy: ['And I am a dickhead, there's your answer for why I was being one'] Janis: ['I don't care'] Jimmy: ['why'd you ask then?'] Janis: ['Didn't say I didn't at the time, it's irrelevant now'] Jimmy: [hits her with a shrug of his own] Janis: [nods like exactly] Jimmy: [gives her a look like wtf is that meant to mean as if he don't know] Janis: ['how much further?] Jimmy: [tells her, let's pretend not that far but far enough they gotta walk awkwardly for a bit longer] Janis: [picks up pace] Jimmy: [does a bit but not that much cos unfit af] Janis: ['gimme the bag'] Jimmy: [gives her a look like um no] Janis: [gives him a ffs look back 'give it here or hurry up, like'] Jimmy: [goes slower cos that bitch aka me] Janis: ['I might not wanna go home but I can still think of better things to do, seriously'] Jimmy: ['Go and do 'em then'] Janis: ['I tried to but you stopped me and I gave you a second chance for some fucking reason but fuck this now'] Jimmy: ['We're pissing distance from this lad's back garden, stop being a knobhead'] Janis: ['You ain't thinking this through, why the hell would we wanna be somewhere we've gotta fake all of this a moment longer?'] Jimmy: ['why do we have to fake owt? You wanted one pic, we've uploaded shitloads'] Janis: ['Um, because it'll look fucking weird if we ain't couply when everyone at this party knows we're meant to be'] Jimmy: ['Mia treats 'em like staff they ain't gonna gossip with her like besties'] Janis: ['You go in and do what you like then, I've got no reason to be here'] Jimmy: ['there's reasons'] Janis: ['yeah' purposefully sounding ambiguous to as if that was a question or nah] Jimmy: ['Are you gonna make me say 'em or what?'] Janis: [when you're just like 'ha' 'cos clearly not happening and just start walking with again like alright] Jimmy: [give her an I hate you look that so isn't] Janis: ['I got it, yeah, now can you fucking light up, I need to smoke before going in there'] Jimmy: [does because it's his job 5ever] Janis: [just smoking your feelings lol] Jimmy: [#mood] Janis: ['why don't you wanna be my friend?'] Jimmy: ['why do you wanna be my friend?'] Janis: ['why are you incapable of answering a question straight?'] Jimmy: ['for someone who don't care why do you care so fucking much?'] Janis: ['if I ask a question, I want an answer, simple'] Jimmy: ['what if it's not?' fucked yourself then, ain't you, mate'] Janis: ['that ain't the point, I'm asking what you think, what you know, whatever the fuck the context is, I don't ask you so you can turn it around on me like I don't know all that about me already'] Jimmy: ['the point is, rich girl, this ain't your world, your parents just paid for a bigger house on a nicer bit of it, and I don't properly work for you sweetheart, so I can do owt I like. Better yet speech is free and I can say whatever the fuck I wanna an' all.'] Janis: ['yeah? and what are you saying then, Jimmy? fuck all. so if you'll excuse me-' and bowling inside like you know this lad personally but you know he ain't gonna mind] Jimmy: [staying outside as if that makes a bit of difference or any real deliberate point other than you can't be around the bae] Jimmy: Alright, what I'm saying is I don't wanna do this anymore Jimmy: deal's off Janis: Alright Janis: fine Janis: thanks for telling me Jimmy: 👍 Janis: any reason why beyond the obvious or Jimmy: why are the reasons any of your business? Jimmy: in the fine print was it, that Janis: because I was in it too and I'd tell you if I just switched out of nowhere with no warning Jimmy: figure it out Janis: 👍 Jimmy: I just want out, we can do it however you like Jimmy: take the night and sort it Janis: wow generous Jimmy: that's me Janis: I don't need time, it's easy Janis: I'll get with this lad, you can 'find' out Jimmy: I'm not making you look bad that's not part of it Janis: How do you reckon on making me look good Jimmy: He's a fucking 2, we can do more than that for you, like Janis: You wanna vet the lad I fake cheat with Janis: that's not mental at all Jimmy: 'cause all of this has been dead sane Janis: yeah, and you want out so you can quit acting like you remotely give a shit Jimmy: calm it down Jimmy: it don't look great for me if you fake fuck my ugly co-workers Janis: welll I DON'T care Janis: you said I can do it however I like Jimmy: I reckoned on you being smart when I said that is why Janis: nah you reckoned on me caring to make you look good too, why should I Jimmy: it was the deal if nowt else Janis: the deal is off, by your request Jimmy: you're such a massive dickhead Janis: you Jimmy: you don't get it Janis: what don't I get Jimmy: what do you get? Janis: piss off if you're starting that again Janis: came in here to get away from that Jimmy: you can't answer it 'cause the answer is nowt Jimmy: but you think we can be mates Janis: and you do? alright Janis: you don't answer anything so glass houses Janis: pot kettle, whatever else Jimmy: 👌 Janis: bye Jimmy: what are you gonna do? Janis: wanna be more specific Jimmy: Do I need to? Janis: yep Jimmy: 🙄 Jimmy: Are you gonna drag that twat into it or what? Janis: not that I owe you shit Janis: but I'll pick someone you don't work with Jimmy: or think of a better idea Janis: it's a great idea Jimmy: How? Janis: you get the sympathy vote and to be mr good guy and I get to show I don't give a shit so they can miss me with the told you it wouldn't lasts and whatever else they're dying to Janis: win win Jimmy: if I wanted a popularity 🏆 instead of being left alone Janis: your personality will put 'em off give it 5 minutes Jimmy: piss off Janis: you know I'm right Jimmy: I know you're fuming Janis: about what, exactly Janis: being stupid enough to ever agree to this, yeah, I am actually Jimmy: 💔🎻💔 Janis: whatever Jimmy: [i'm using the weather and saying it's just started to rain heavy so he has to come inside or else he never will] Janis: [chatting to some rando and trying not to look his way even though of course you notice] Jimmy: [when you go up to her to give her a drink cos you're jealous af and you want said random to fuck off] Janis: [when you look at it like you've never seen a drink before in your life 'you trying to poison me now?' whoever this lad is should run 'cos no need to be involved in this drama] Jimmy: [lowkey force her to take it so rude 'drown your sorrows, girl'] Janis: [that's deffo getting thrown at you like I'm sorry boy] Jimmy: ['when you have to go find a towel now if you didn't before RIP to the bathroom with you] Janis: [when you have to either go outside or find somewhere in this gaff to be alone 'cos people love drama and would be being so annoying] Jimmy: [100% gonna look for her when he's done though cos king of the mixed message if she's outside I'm gonna lol cos you're getting wet again boy] Janis: [probably 'cos realistically how big is this house that there's a room no other fucker is in lmao] Jimmy: [unlucky dickhead] Janis: [wherever the nearest available shelter is, whether that's a tree or a bus stop, whatever] Jimmy: [either way #mood and he's finding her there, popping up v unwanted] Janis: [when you see him coming and it's like literally wtf boy 'I swear down, Jimmy, do not'] Jimmy: [when you just kiss her as hard as you fucking can because this is over and wtf do you have to lose and you're thinking you'll just walk away after okay boy well done truly you messy slag] Janis: [when you go for it even though you reckon you definitely shouldn't now because you feel something so got to chase it 'til you can't no more] Jimmy: [the most ridiculously intense make out of all time casually happening until he breaks it off cos when there's too much drama at school you gotta walk awaaaaaaaaaaay] Janis: Pussy Jimmy: 💀💀💔💀💔 Jimmy: brutal Janis: fuck you Jimmy: you wanted an answer so bad, there it is Jimmy: take it Janis: no, as per with you it was just more questions Jimmy: might've been able to find some answers in the bottom of that bottle you chucked at me Jimmy: so hasty you Janis: should've kept it then Janis: you need it more than me Jimmy: I've got others Janis: I'm so pleased for you Jimmy: 💕 Janis: Stop talking to me Jimmy: stop talking to me Janis: gladly Jimmy: 👍

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askweisswolf · 6 years

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@glimadora-week posting late, but this one is for Day 2: Cliche Tropes. Originally started out as “sharing one bed” and instead ended up being “caught in the rain”. Eh.

I apologize that these are so late, linking these into one chapter story is taking more than I expected. FF.net here and AO3 here.

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Bright Moon hadn’t hosted a celebration of this size in a long time. Glimmer couldn’t even remember such a celebration being hosted before, probably because before now, well… there hadn’t been much to celebrate. The Rebellion hadn’t been beaten, and had continued to fight on even after Micah’s death, but by the same token they hadn’t really won after that, either. Their fight with the Horde had simply become about surviving.

But today, they had fought against the Horde and they had won. Today, for the first time in years, the Rebellion wasn’t only about surviving. Today, for the first time in years, it actually looked like they had a chance of winning. So of course, there was a celebration. Of course, a lot of people showed up for that celebration, particularly when several princesses had been involved in the battle.

And of course, the celebration had gone on for the rest of the day and quite late into the night. Bright Moon might not have hosted a celebration so large in a long time, but it had once upon a time, and so it was lucky enough to be built with just enough room to house people when they decided to sleep over for the night after a large celebration.

Unfortunately, the last celebration in Bright Moon had happened before Glimmer’s life time. So while it was built to host a large celebration, it hadn’t been expanded on since then.

And that was how Glimmer was informed that Adora had graciously offered her room for additional bedding when it came up that there would be a shortage of beds. About halfway through the explanation of how this had happened and an apology, the princess held up a hand to silence the staff member. “You spoke to Adora?” she asked.

The young man blinked. Of all of the reactions he’d expected, he… hadn’t been expecting that. “Yes,” he said uncertainly.

“How long ago did you speak with Adora?”

“Ah… a little while ago?” He wasn’t entirely sure where these questions were going, but Glimmer had a particularly intense gleam in her eyes. “I’m afraid I’m not sure how long ago it was. I apologize.”

Glimmer sighed and rubbed her eyes. “It’s okay, at least you saw her. Everyone else I’ve asked hasn’t been able to find her since Sea Hawk burst into my room to drag me out to the party.”

He didn’t know how to respond to that, so he didn’t. After a moment, Glimmer glanced back at him. “You wouldn’t have happened to see where she went at least?” It was almost painfully hopeful. “I can work with a direction. Any general direction, really.”

“… I think she went outside?” he tried. “She mentioned going to check on Swift Wind, maybe.”

“The stables! Perfect! I mean, Swift Wind hates our stables, but he likes to be there for the other horses, so… it’s a place! And I know Adora might be there! Thank you very much!”

He opened his mouth to reply—he was pretty sure he intended to say he was only doing his job and there was no need to thank him, though he did appreciate the politeness Queen Angella had managed to pass down to her daughter—but then he discovered that Glimmer was already gone, simply leaving a small cloud of pink sparkles in her wake.

He blinked a few times, then sighed and went on with his duties for the evening. Princesses were weird.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

The weather outside of Bright Moon didn’t match the calming atmosphere inside the palace. As everyone inside was beginning to settle down for the night and sleep, a storm had broken out. There was no thunder and no lightning, so it wouldn’t keep everyone up during the night, but it would still be a pain to be outside in the cold and the wet. It was times like these that Glimmer was grateful for her powers, and she certainly wasn’t above abusing them to try and keep herself as dry as possible between the palace and the stables.

Hey, if she had the powers, she was going to use them. They might not have always been effective in combat, but they certainly had their moments. And at this point, she still didn’t know yet how her talk with Adora would pan out; it would be a small mercy to at least have it without being completely soaked, on top of potentially having her heart broken.

It was her own fault. She was hoping. She shouldn’t have been hoping, after the way Adora had run off, but the hope was there nonetheless. And when she hoped, the letdown always hurt worse than not hoping. But apparently her heart was horrible at listening to her head—a common and recurring problem with her, as much as she hated to admit that her mother was right in that particular regard—and she’d been nursing a minor crush on her taller friend since bringing her to the Rebellion.

A crush that, if she was being totally honest with herself, had been growing from minor to major for some time. A crush that she had largely kept to herself (venting to Bow didn’t count!) because she had eyes and she could see that whatever Adora had had in the past in the Horde with the Force Captain named Catra was now all complicated and messy. A crush that she had mostly kept quiet about (venting to Bow still didn’t count!) because Adora had been under a constant amount of stress and pressure, and she hadn’t wanted to add to it by bringing up feelings.

She’d just been trying to be a good friend. Because that was what Adora really needed, more than anything else—a good friend.

Only now they’d kissed and it’d barely been anything, really, but Glimmer was realizing now that her crush was like, super major and before she could say or do anything about it, Adora had managed to slip away and disappear. It shouldn’t have been possible with how tall she was, but somehow she’d managed it. Even going to the stable was just on the vague confirmation of a member of the castle staff, and when Glimmer finally blinked into existence inside the barn she fully expected to be met with nothing but baffled and mildly spooked horses.

What she was actually met with was a startled yelp from Adora, who jumped back from the space Glimmer suddenly occupied, tripped over her own feet in the process, and crumbled into an undignified heap into a pile of fresh hay.

Glimmer didn’t laugh. She didn’t look down at the crumbled form of her friend and snicker after an emotionally charged moment. Nope. She was the perfect picture of composure.

“You know,” Adora groaned, “it’s not nice to laugh at someone after startling them.”

Okay, maybe she laughed a little. She swallowed to compose herself and crossed her arms over her chest, lightly tapping her foot on the ground as she looked down at her taller friend. “It’s not nice to run away after kissing someone too, you know.”

It was a gentle jab, at most. Despite the uncomfortable coiling in her chest, Glimmer wasn’t actually mad; what little Adora had said about the Horde indicated that they didn’t generally do emotions, and what emotions they did allow didn’t seem to be the healthy kind of emotions. That she’d reacted this way was… well, expected, she supposed. She didn’t think the Horde actively encouraged any kind of romance. It must not have been gentle enough, since blue-gray eyes rapidly shifted between Glimmer and the stable door as Adora measured the distance she’d need to cover to get away.

Glimmer sighed and offered her hand, after a moment. “Don’t bother,” she said. “It’s pouring outside. You’d just get soaked and sick.”

“I’ve never been sick before, actually.” Adora took her hand though. Glimmer would like to say she pulled her up, but considering the natural height difference between them it was more like she gave a small tug and the blonde boosted herself up onto her feet the rest of the way.

“Bow tells me it’s unpleasant.” She let go of the blonde’s hand, and tried to tell herself that she imagined the brief flash of disappointment in her eyes. “I’m sorry, I was just having some fun. I’m not mad, Adora.”

There was a moment of silence between them, broken only by the sound of the rain outside; Glimmer could have sworn it was her imagination, but it sounded like it was coming down harder than before. Finally Adora shrugged and seemed to shrink into herself, shoving her hands behind her back. “Maybe you should be,” she murmured.

Glimmer blinked. “Why?”

“I-I mean—Glimmer, I kissed you.”

“Yeah, and I kissed you back.”

“Well, you—you did, but… wasn’t that your first kiss?”

Glimmer sputtered, cursing herself as she felt her face heat up. “H-How did you know about that?! I mean… how do you even know about first kisses being important? Do they cover it as Force Captain orientation or something?”

Adora had the decency to look sheepish. “Your castle has a huge library, and I had some free time.”

Okay so, apparently the former Horde soldier and current host of She-ra had a bit of a romantic streak. That was stupidly endearing.

Glimmer gave up the fight for composure and sighed, plopping down onto the hay and pulling her knees up to her chest as she peered out of the barn to the downpour outside. “If it helps, technically that wasn’t my first kiss.”

Adora sat down next to her tentatively. “It wasn’t?”

“Bow and I kissed when… gosh, I think we were like twelve? We were talking about it, and we wanted to see what the big deal was.” She shrugged, her eyes following the trail of rain drops. “It didn’t seem like such a big deal after we tried it.”

There was a swallow next to her; she heard her friend shift, and after a moment she felt warmth and softness pressing against her side. “And now?”

She didn’t look away from the rain. “Now I can see why it’s a big deal. I guess it depends on how much you like the person you kiss, and...” She trailed off, sighed. “I like you a lot, Adora.”

“… Are you sure about that?” It was so soft that Glimmer would have sworn she’d imagined it, if she wasn’t listening.

“… Yeah.” She rested her hands down next to her, sneaking a glance at the taller blonde. “You don’t—have to feel obligated to like me back or anything, though. I know everything’s really complicated for you right now.”

That got a quiet laugh from the other girl. “Everything’s been really complicated for me for awhile, Glimmer. You and Bow have been like, my only constants since this started.”

“I know.”

“And I know I haven’t talked about it with… anyone, really, and maybe I need to start working on that, but the Horde never like… encouraged emotions. Catra and I were sort of an odd case.”

“You don’t talk about her.”

“I don’t know how to. She’s...” Adora trailed off into silence, then sighed and dropped her forehead to her knees. “Complicated. A lot of things are complicated with me. You probably shouldn’t like me so much.”

Glimmer shrugged. “Probably. I still like you a lot regardless. You’re really sweet, and you’re stupidly noble, and you’re utterly gorgeous as either yourself or She-ra.” She made a show of tapping her finger to her lips. “Yup, I still like you a lot. I think I was doomed from the moment we met, really.”

That got another laugh out of Adora, surprised and amused. “You couldn’t stand me when we first met.”

“Clearly I changed my mind.”

“Clearly.” Adora shifted to get more comfortable on the hay, and after a moment she lowered her hands. Glimmer felt the tentative brush of Adora’s fingers against hers, and then their fingers laced together and she felt a gentle squeeze.

She tried to ignore the way that simple contact made her heart flutter. Tried, and failed miserably.

“For what it’s worth,” the blonde said finally, “I like you a lot too, Glimmer. And that was actually my first kiss.”

And they probably still needed to talk about that, sometime soon. Because to call the whole thing complicated was an understatement; Glimmer was the princess of Bright Moon, and good will or no Adora was still a former Horde soldier and the host of She-ra. There Adora’s whole past with the Horde, and her relationship with Catra. There was still a lot that needed to be settled between the two of them from here.

But for the moment, that could all be settled in the future. Glimmer was perfectly content to wait, particularly when Adora shifted and rested her head against her shoulder, closing her eyes with a small, content sigh.

And maybe she hadn’t been planning to spend her night out in the barn, caught in the rain, but Glimmer realized then that she wouldn’t want to be anywhere else.

#glimadora week #glimadora #Glimmer #Adora #my writing

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werewolfwilds · 6 years

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i redid an ask meme that i had originally done ~3 years ago to see the comparison so for archiving purposes im putting it in a lil journal entry here ! i wanna start doing small journal entries again it was fun when i did that

new answers bolded

1) what images do you have set for your desktop/cell phone wallpapers?

my desktop bg is literally just…. a collage of kageyama manga screencaps a h a,,,, and my cellphone bg are drawings some gay drew me like 74724 years ago :v // my desktop rn is actually a background from one of the dmmd routes LMFAO..... idk which one it is but i’ve always liked those bg pics!! my cell lock screen is p5 art and my bg is leopika

2) have you ever had a crush on a teacher?

nooooope // nah

3) what was your last text message?

my phone is dead so i wouldnt be able to tell you lmfao i dont even remember // it was a gif from kelly lol

4) what do you see yourself doing in 10 years?

hopefully working a job i enjoy and making costumes and being happy!! // god i have no idea and it freaks me out... hopefully working,,

5) if you could be anywhere else right now, where would you be?

hoommee ((or at katsucon tbh)) // at the beach with friends maybe

6) what was your coolest halloween costume?

a white cat probably lmao // i dont think ive ever had a particularly exciting halloween costume but one year i was sharpay from high school musical and i think i peaked then tbh

7) what was your favorite 90s show?

uhhhh….. i didnt really… start watching tv until like… the 2000′s so i really cant tell you man lol // spongebob started in 1999 does that coUNT,

8) who was your last kiss?

(answer redacted) // :/ someone should kiss me so i can change this answer lmao

9) have you ever been stood up?

nope // nah

10) favorite ice cream flavor?

vanilla w/ vanilla oreos ok u need to underst a n d // this hasn’t changed i haven’t had this particular ice cream in a long time but i still stand by it

11) have you been to las vegas?

nahh // nope

12) your favorite pair of shoes?

idk i have these black ones i wear everywhere lol // i have a pair of white sneakers that i refuse to stop wearing now

13) honestly, have you ever cheated on your significant other?

i wouldnt even consider it. // no bc i’m not a piece of shit lmao?

14) what is your favorite fruit?

hmmm…. pineapple orrr…. strawberries but only if they’re the really good kind like they have to be perfect // pineapple!!

15) have you talked to anyone on tumblr that you could see yourself dating/having sex with? if possible?

….. ye s… yes. // in the past apparently so but thinking about it now nah lol

16) are you into hookups? short or long term relationships?

hookups arent my thing eh i prefer long term relationships altho i cant really say ive been in a “long” term relationship pffff // i don’t think hookups will ever be my thing, emotionally long term relationships are what i’m here for but i’m also a Very Impulsive Person so i cant tell you if this will stay a fact :’)

17) do you smoke? if so, what?

nope dont wanna // no thanks

18) what do you do to get over your anger?

usually talk to people or shout into word // i have to vent about it to someone probably a thousand times even months or years after it happens tbh

19) do you believe in god?

nahh // nah

20) does the person you’re in love with know it?

i aint in love with anyone rn so no? // i’m not in love with anyone.

21) favorite position?

………….. for w hat………. // oh honey lmfao... N/A

22) what’s your horoscope sign?

virgo/ox ovob // Virgo/sun, Aries/moon, Libra/rising and Cancer/midheaven

23) your fears?

literally everything i already named a few so ill name some others… ghh anything in… the ocean or lakes and stuff frightens me and i really dont know why bu tlike…. fish and crabs and jellyfish and seaweed cuz it’s evil and stu f f basically anything that’s not a mammal or turtles or penguins…. lo l im a baby // uncertainty is a big fear of mine and also people being mad at me lmao... as far as physical fears though i have debilitating fears of almost all insects/arachnids and lobsters/shrimp/crawfish :^)))))

24) how many pets do you have? what kind?

two cats and a dog!! // one cat one dog

25) what never fails to turn you on?

i dunno,,/////// // lol neck biting/kissing oof

26) your idea of a perfect first date?

im okay with mostly anything i just really like spending time with the person ; v ; // i’ve never really had an answer for this? thinking about dates has always made me so anxious for whatever reason but i’ll be happy to just spend time with them doing whatever honestly, i’m a super indecisive person aha

27) what is something most people don’t know about you?

i dont really know tbh lmfao // i’ve considered in the past looking into mental conditions (anxiety/bpd/etc) to see if i might have one or two but i never want to say anything about it because i don’t want to self-diagnose anything.

28) what makes you feel the happiest?

nice weather and nice conversations w/ best people u//v//u // nice weather and hanging out with people who are fun and easy to talk to

29) what store do you shop at most often?

does….. arda wigs count or… // does arda wigs still count bc mood lmao but truthfully now it’s probably target

30) how do you feel about oral? giving and/or receiving?

kkdkjsfkjkjfj??fsfj/// go for i t??? i have no problems with i t??? i dont think ill ever be willing to put a dick in my mouth though // these random sexual questions thrown in here are something aren’t they lmao. not going to disclose much but i will stand by the fact that i will not put a dick in my mouth lo l

31) do you believe in karma?

sometimes ye // i believe that people will eventually get what’s coming to them but i don’t believe in karma as a solid concept if that makes sense? like i don’t think it’s guaranteed

32) are you single?

yup yup // yeah it’s been wild lmao

33) do you think flowers or candy are a better way to apologize?

i think being sincere is the best way to apologize– if you truly mean it the person will know. you dont need to buy your forgiveness. // the best way to apologize is just to apologize sincerely and change your behavior if it’s applicable.

34) are you a good swimmer?

ehh??? im ok i guess– i took swimming lessons as a kid but i havent done legit swimming ever since then lmao,, ive always been best at the backstroke tho yea // i mean i have the ability to swim but i’m not olympic-worthy or anything lmao

35) coffee or tea?

ehhh im not big on either tbh // chocolate milk and you can fight me

36) online shopping or shopping in person?

depends what your shopping for i guess?? online is more relaxed i guess // online probably because shopping in person Gives Me Anxiety

37) would you rather be older or younger than your current age?

ehhh im happy where i am tbh // older

38) cats or dogs?

do not make me choose // cats and dogs* there i fixed it for you

39) are you a competitive person?

ahaa,,,,, oh god yeah,, // OOF yeah

40) do you believe in aliens?

i believe there’s life on other planets somewhere?? so i guess?? // i believe in aliens in the sense that there’s no way we are the only living life forms in the universe but not in the science-fiction way you feel me

41) do you like dancing?

i do but i suck at it lmao // i do but i: A- suck, and B- have no stamina

42) what kind of music to you listen to?

nearly everything tbh // i’m not picky when it comes to music but imma be real w u. almost all of the music on my phone is kpop. seventeen is my favorite group along with astro, and i also enjoy super junior, shinee, red velvet, etc among so many others,,, im pretty wide spread !

43) what is your favorite cartoon character?

i will never be able to pick just one // i’ll literally never be able to answer this

44) where are you from?

philadelphia uvu // philly!

45) eat at home or eat out?

hmmm at home. // at home

46) how much more social are you when you’re drunk?

i never plan on being drunk tyvm // i’ve never consumed alcohol in my life and to be Quite Fucking Honest i want nothing to do with it

47) what was the last thing you bought for yourself?

bracelets ! ; u ; // uh... excluding food and music... earrings i think

48) why do you think your followers follow you?

uhhhhhhh lmfao i have no idea i think… a good amount are for my cosplays at least?? or id like to think so lmfao but i really dont know pfft // my followers have just accumulated and hung around over the years... i know i gained a good amount from my snk days as arlert-the-troops and then through my haikyuu phase, whether it was for my cosplay or other posts that i made... whenever someone follows me now im not entirely sure what its for but i appreciate everyone who’s stuck around!

49) how many hours do you sleep at night?

it’s never regular man // 6-9 (lol) hours is pretty normal for me

50) what worries you most about the future?

everything tbh // the future as a concept worries me lol

#useless shouting #journal crap #sorry for so many personal posts lately ive been having fun with them lmfao

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hedgehog-goulash7 · 7 years

Text

Oh my- the OP of that long Bucky Barnes post - to which I made a reasonable and TRUE comment - just apparently blocked me from reblogging their answer to my commentary. Which seems...cowardly? And typical of the Stucky stans, who do not seem to want to engage in friendly fandom debate and would rather hurl insults and block you from replying or carrying out intelligent discourse. Anyway -- their response was this (copied and pasted, because, lol, no reblog allowed):

fearlessinger

Tony is that you? I’ll have you know that not everything is about you or your guilty dirty conscience, and this post sure wasn’t. Go back to putting on hold the US secretary of state while you stare moodily into the distance, or whatever you rich white men who never have to fear any repercussion for anything do with your free time. Actually, if you have time to spare you might wanna think about helping your friends who have been wrongfully and unlawfully imprisoned in that secret superjail in the middle of the ocean… No, eh? I didn’t think so.

#i am amazed #honestly #it’s really amazing how you felt the need to take a post that didn’t discuss accountability or Tony Stark in any way shape or form

#and make it all about how you believe Bucky to be actually guilty and think Tony is awesome #i imagine knowing that at this point in the mcu Steve and Bucky are better people than Tony in every possible way must hurt a whole lot

#but please next time take a deep breath #count to ten #and then if you still feel like venting #make your own post #mcu #cacw

Source:fearlessinger

MY reply to this nonsense:

Friend @fearlessinger -- my commentary was completely reasonable and factual and invited friendly debate. Sorry that you seem to have taken it as a slam - it was not. You do appear to be responding to simple facts with ire and defensiveness, though. Come on - I even said I agreed with most of what you wrote. But you did leave the door open to question a few points that were patently not factual.

The FACT remains that AS FAR AS WE KNOW in the story, speaking from the audience viewpoint, Bucky IS guilty of the murders of Howard and Maria Stark. It’s not a diss -- it’s simply the truth, as far as we know it (and I did leave open the possibility that we will find out the video was doctored. Until then, though, the video is very damning - he kills a wounded man AND a defenseless, innocent woman...YOU CAN’T ARGUE that. It happened. It’s part of the story.).

And what of ALL THE OTHER PEOPLE he admits he did kill? You CAN’T escape from facts -- if he killed them, he killed them. Fact. That’s the entire tragedy of Bucky’s character - so if you take that away or say he’s “innocent,” you’re robbing him of his compelling story. The thing that’s compelling and sad about him IS that he committed all those murders, and he knows it, and he knows he needs to be accountable even though he was programmed and essentially someone else’s killing machine. The guilt must be immense.

Thus my discussion about the importance of accountability in the MCU -- for EVERY major character. Think about it - Bruce with the death and destruction on his conscience from when he Hulks out. Black Widow with the red in her ledger. Tony with his early life as a weapons dealer, and then Ultron, which he blames himself for. Thor with his responsibility for his own world and his feelings of accountability for his friends in Midgard -- and his love/hate relationship with his brother. Steve with his guilt and feelings of accountability over Bucky.

It’s also a simple truth that the defense that Bucky was “brainwashed” MAY or may not be allowed in a court of law. In a real court, as I said, it would probably be laughed out, and a jury would probably not buy it. In a COMICS court - well, who knows. Somehow they will need to redeem Bucky in order to let him function in the MCU as a hero. Possibly the chaos of the Thanos invasion - and perhaps some heroic act by Bucky during that - may redeem him, but again, you can’t argue that Steve isn’t currently keeping Bucky OUT of the legal system that could decree him guilty or not guilty. Fact: Steve IS keeping him out. Even Bucky thinks this may be a Bad Idea.

So, friend, I am not sure what you’re so wound up about, to the point of blocking me after an attempt at simple, rational fandom discourse. I wasn’t “venting” - simply offering a reasoned debate to what you posted, part of which was patently debatable.

And here’s the thing: when you post some discourse, you’re de facto inviting some discourse back - and it may not always be something from those who simply echo and amplify your argument. That’s why Tumblr allows comments under posts - so people can reblog and answer you and -- sometimes debate you on some points.

Good grief, I am not sure why fans get their knickers in a twist over such simple debating. It’s very conservative, fearful thinking - like OH MY GOD SOMEONE DISAGREED WITH ME -- even in a polite way and I MUST BLOCK THEM AND THEN LAUGH AT THEM (because, why, you don’t have any good response? Blocking and ridicule are the response of someone who fears those who disagree with them).

I do persist in thinking my points were made politely and reasonably and that it certainly did not invite blocking or dissing.

Sigh - this sort of small-mindedness in fandom makes me sad. What became of the days of friendly debates and discussions?

P.S. - I will take on the statements about Tony in your reply in a separate post, because those also are highly debatable. Thank you for the opening to do so. Friendly Fandom Debate (TM) is my LIFE.

#sighhh #fandom wank #stans #Bucky Barnes #Tony Stark #what in the world is it with people #I think my points were friendly??

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wishingfornever · 6 years

Text

1/28/2018 – No Contact: Return From Absence

Hey, you. Been a while.

Four days. It’s been so busy. A lot of work. It’s my day off. Sunday. A lots been happening and I haven’t been talking about it. Last time we spoke, I was talking about my cousin. He was found a couple of days ago.

He had a black eye, and cuts from rope around his wrists. He was beaten, but otherwise he’s alright. He was released by his captors with… an apology. It would seem the people who had kidnapped him confused him with their target. He has the same car as their target does, so that’s what confused him. They took him, beat him, and later realized he was the wrong mark. Then they apologized and drove him back to his house.

He’s lucky. When I heard what happened, I laughed.

Looking back… it brought back a lot of memories about Alain. One of my earliest memories, I was in Gasquet. It’s a small town, near where I was born (Crescent City). I was young and I had this… problem. I pooped a lot. Perhaps one of the reasons I hate toilet humor today. I was like 2 or 3? Super young. I think I was in preschool or kindergarten… maybe I was older then.

Not the point.

The thing is, I crapped my pants. I didn’t want to ask my dad for help because he’d yell at me again. He was the least patient now that I think about it. He yelled at me a lot. Maybe that’s why my mom was so soft on me, because my dad was just so angry.

Anyways, I was sitting on the toilet, with dirty underwear and I was already a little upset. What do I do? So, I just sat there feeling bad. I hear a knock on the door.

Thing about this door. It’s a thin door with these sort of wood vents? I recall because I could see Alain’s outline. He was knocking on the door and trying to coarse me to open the door. He lightened his voice, told me he was a random name from school. I told him no one named that was at my school.

Honestly, I told him that with enthusiasm in my voice. It was funny to me. Got my mind off the issue at hand.

He said another name and thought he was just being silly. He kept trying to get in and I told him I didn’t know the person behind the name. Then he got tired and broke into the bathroom. The door was weak and not particularly reliable, so it just opened after a while of him trying to get in. Opened pretty easily.

Alain had a video camera and then started to film me, with dirty underwear and started mocking me. I was devastated. I was crying and told him to get out. I might have tried hitting him, but I was a toddler so that was fucking useless. I don’t think he was filming for some sort of weird, sexual fetish. I think he was just being an asshole.

Regardless, it’s one of my earliest memories with Alain. Not a very positive one. I think Alain thinks I don’t remember it. I haven’t told anyone. ANYONE. That’s not an exaggeration, I have literally never brought it up until now in any form.

Now that I think about it, I don’t like public bathrooms without privacy. I don’t do urinals without dividers. I use the actual stall if the urinals don’t have dividers. I’m not sure if that is because of Alain, but… maybe?

Eh… I’m changing the topic. Let’s talk about work.

Work is… meh. Busy. So busy. I think I’m starting to phone it in. I’m half assing my job and not thinking twice. Which is strange. I feel more misanthropic, of course, but I hide it well. I hide everything well.

I’m loved, however… within the last few weeks, I’ve had… the best compliments. “You are so nice.” “I hope my son grows up to be just like you.” “You’re like the best cashier ever.” Just shit like that. It’s weird. My charm is almost entirely pre-scripted and… it works. I’m not even kidding about the son growing up to be just like me, either. A lady said that and it confused me. I wanted to be like, “Lady, the love of my life dumped me because of my lifelong depression and I want to kill myself on a daily basis” but I kept my own troubles to myself.

I wish I didn’t. Sometimes, I just wish I could trust someone enough to open up like that. You don’t count, of course. You don’t know me. Everything I say could just be fake. Certainly has bias but everyone is a little bit biased.

This isn’t to say I don’t trust you, which I probably wouldn’t. I say this because you can’t trust me. No matter how real anything I say is, I can’t be trusted. I’m trying to treat this as my own personal journal but I can’t escape the fact that I know someone will read this. And you know this. So, you’ll have to take EVERYTHING I say with a grain of salt.

Regardless, everyone thinks I’m happy at work. Except for Diana. She… I don’t think she likes me anymore. I feel like she wants to avoid me. This could just be me, but I’m certain of it. I’ll give her space. If she wants to talk to me then she will. I won’t force her.

I had someone complain about me. She came back again. Was a fierce bitch. Only customer to not like me. I bagged salt with food items and it drove her crazy. The second time, I was bagging and she told me not to bag something with some cookies. I can’t recall what it was, I think it was in a can. Fabreeze maybe? Not sure. But I recall the cookies because I intended to bag it with something that wasn’t heavy. Something that wasn’t encased in metal, you know. So the cookies won’t break.

She, however, was telling me that the cookies wouldn’t taste right. What?

It’s in her head, but I’m not going to challenge her thoughts. Not because of professional courtesy but because… I’m actually a little sympathetic. Maybe empathetic. I can’t stand the idea of tasting something that has been tainted in someway. If I think something is rotten, I can’t enjoy eating it. I try to consume it as fast as possible. It’s not a good way to handle things, but… that’s life.

I can’t recall all the compliments I get by customers. They’re a lot but people adore me at work. It… baffles me. Just because I’m smiling and enthusiastic. Of course, the enthusiasm is more than faked. It’s fabricated. I can’t be enthusiastic without energy, and I have been the least energetic. Today, I slept nearly 12 hours because I’ve been… SO sleepy this week. I’ve basically been living off energy shots. Not fun.

Random, but Shane messaged me out of the blue on my way to work. It… stressed me out a bit. I have been avoiding him since what happened. It was simple, single worded message: Yo.

I wasn’t going to respond, but when I was told to go to lunch, I decided I should. He hasn’t blocked me flat out like Dennis and Esther. I mean, I thought he did a while ago but seems it was something on Facebook’s end. Whatever.

So, I open the message and see… a game invite. It says, “Yo” underneath it.

If he wanted to open contact with me again, he’ll have to work a bit harder than that. I don’t respond to game invites. -,-

Speaking of the old drama… I had this dream last night. With Esther, of course. She was in my life again and we were dating once more. Romantically involved and I couldn’t be happier. I told her that this must be a dream. I thought hard, focusing on the world I was in and decided it was reality. She called me a dork because I was seeing if it were a dream. I told her she didn’t understand. Whenever I dream of her, I wake up feeling so… broken. That I finally had her back… it was hard to believe it was really happening.

Of course, I woke up. I felt more broken than ever before. I didn’t cry, though, just… betrayed. Don’t know why she’s haunting my dreams again. I haven’t dreamed of her in a while. :/

I think I mentioned this but… I went on a spending spree a while back. I regret it. Especially since I spoke to Jonny today and he told me that the prices of computers went up because more people are getting into cryptocurrencies or whatever? Bitcoin, you know… Digital money. Fucking christ.

Capitalism is destroying my interests. Like… you don’t need a new computer to get Bitcoin. You just need a computer, and even then. Why would you increase things like graphic cards? What does that have to do with anything? That’s stupid. ><

Regardless, my current spending spree lead to me spending 120 on two games. Fuck. Really? Not including DLC. Eh… Maybe it’ll be worth it later. I guess I’ll start gaming every now and then. Once a week at the most, really. I need to get back into Rosetta Stone.

I need to exercise more, however. I did some arm curls with my new weights… they’re heavy. I never felt weaker. My arms look so skinny. Is it because I starved myself? Where did my muscle go?

It’s discerning. I used to be… strong. So strong. Has no will to live taken my strength from me? Have I allowed myself to sink so low?

Downloading some games from steam… whoa. I bought a lot of games. Never played many of them though. I don’t remember getting these games. Maybe I mentioned it here? Peculiar. :o

Most of these games are old. Classic games. Jade Empire, STALKER Shadow of Chernobyl and other games from the series. Interesting stuff… I really wanted to play all of these. Will I get to?

Asking a lot of questions… mostly to myself.

Which reminds me… THIS SHIT IS IMPORTANT: I’ve decided that I will write a letter. Write. With my hands. Write it, leave it in an envelope. I will leave my computer password and ask her to open up a file saying, “If I die” which will instruct her on what to do next. I will instruct her to send a SINGLE email to send this journal to my friend who has agreed to post this for me if I am unable. The email, will be a draft and it’ll be ready to be sent, just needs to have the file attached. If Adela wants to read this, then she can.

I suggest she doesn’t.

I will have the password to my Tumblr in this email and my friend will use that to post on. I’ll tell her to make two. One to strip and the other as a back up. The one that she strips should rely on copying and pasting. Or, really, CUTTING and pasting because a deleted chapter is a GOOD chapter. If there is a typo then a day is attached to a singular post. I’ll have her use the “Find” key and look for “Contact” as I’ve left “No Contact” on EVERY post thus far. It’ll be part of the title of every post made, hopefully.

In the event that I do die before the year is through, then the final post will perhaps notify when my friend got the email. So, maybe a few days later without posts means I’m dead? Maybe I’ve just been busy. What’s the purpose of this?

Really… it adds suspense! Ho, ho!

Why do we need suspense?

Eh… we don’t, really. But it better catalogs what happens as they happen. A year later, of course… but still. It’s not to make you panic, really. But it’s so you don’t know what happens next. As I said, this is my journal but I’m fully aware that it’s being read. So, unlike with making it biased or unbiased, I’d rather leave it somewhat more feeling how I feel. I don’t know if I’m going to kill myself. But you will if I don’t do this. You’ll know that I survived, or whatever because obviously.

You will see things as I do. So, from this point forward, who knows if I’m alive or dead at the time of reading this? Really… do you need to know? ;)

Eh… maybe you already know. It doesn’t matter, really. I work tomorrow and I really should be doing laundry. I haven’t showered in a couple of days. Might do that before bed.

I have… 120 in my drawer. Used to have more. I have even less in my bank account. I’m such an idiot… I’m such a fool when it comes to money. Just… why? :c

I guess… maybe I won’t see Ariel before I die. I’m such an idiot. I had to have another FUCKING pizza… God, I’m sure I’ve gained weight. ><

New Total War was announced. The Three Kingdoms. That’s Ancient China. Not TOO Ancient but I believe 200 AD? Might be wrong. Still, not quite medieval.

I’m… pretty excited, really. I should have been writing my Jade Empire-esque epic… I predicted that Chinese culture would become a little popular, or at least I have been talking about it a lot lately.

Hrm… Maybe if I’m quick I can get on the boat before it sails… The best time to plant a tree is 20 years ago. Second best time is right now.

This week, I shall dedicate time writing the new book. I shall set aside my historical novel and hope that this will be the book I need. I shall do whatever I can to write it. It shall be done. Tomorrow… Tonight, I dick around. I have to go to bed eventually. D’oh…

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