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worldwrapfederation · 2 years ago
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Chaka Khan Reveals Calling Out Mary J. Blige Over Her Song Throws Shades Adele And Mariah Carey
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afeelgoodblog · 1 year ago
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The Best News of Last Year - 2023 Edition
Welcome to our special edition newsletter recapping the best news from the past year. I've picked one highlight from each month to give you a snapshot of 2023. No frills, just straightforward news that mattered. Let's relive the good stuff that made our year shine.
January - London: Girl with incurable cancer recovers after pioneering treatment
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A girl’s incurable cancer has been cleared from her body after what scientists have described as the most sophisticated cell engineering to date.
2. February - Utah legislature unanimously passes ban on LGBTQ conversion therapy
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The Utah State Legislature has unanimously approved a bill that enshrines into law a ban on LGBTQ conversion therapy.
3. March - First vaccine for honeybees could save billions
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The United States Department of Agriculture (USDA) has approved the world’s first-ever vaccine intended to address the global decline of honeybees. It will help protect honeybees from American foulbrood, a contagious bacterial disease which can destroy entire colonies.
4. April - Fungi discovered that can eat plastic in just 140 days
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Australian scientists have successfully used backyard mould to break down one of the world's most stubborn plastics — a discovery they hope could ease the burden of the global recycling crisis within years. 
5. May - Ocean Cleanup removes 200,000th kilogram of plastic from the Pacific Ocean
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The Dutch offshore restoration project, Ocean Cleanup, says it has reached a milestone. The organization's plastic catching efforts have now fished more than 200,000 kilograms of plastic out of the Pacific Ocean, Ocean Cleanup said on Twitter.
6. June - U.S. judge blocks Florida ban on care for trans minors in narrow ruling, says ‘gender identity is real’
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A federal judge temporarily blocked portions of a new Florida law that bans transgender minors from receiving puberty blockers, ruling Tuesday that the state has no rational basis for denying patients treatment.
7. July - World’s largest Phosphate deposit discovered in Norway
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A massive underground deposit of high-grade phosphate rock in Norway, pitched as the world’s largest, is big enough to satisfy world demand for fertilisers, solar panels and electric car batteries over the next 50 years, according to the company exploiting the resource.
8. August - Successful room temperature ambient-pressure magnetic levitation of LK-99
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If the claim by Sukbae Lee and Ji-Hoon Kim of South Korea’s Quantum Energy Research Centre holds up, the material could usher in all sorts of technological marvels, such as levitating vehicles and perfectly efficient electrical grids.
9. September - World’s 1st drug to regrow teeth enters clinical trials
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The ability to regrow your own teeth could be just around the corner. A team of scientists, led by a Japanese pharmaceutical startup, are getting set to start human trials on a new drug that has successfully grown new teeth in animal test subjects.
10. October - Nobel Prize goes to scientists behind mRNA Covid vaccines
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The Nobel Prize in Physiology or Medicine has been awarded to a pair of scientists who developed the technology that led to the mRNA Covid vaccines. Professors Katalin Kariko and Drew Weissman will share the prize.
11. November - No cases of cancer caused by HPV in Norwegian 25-year olds, the first cohort to be mass vaccinated for HPV.
Last year there were zero cases of cervical cancer in the group that was vaccinated in 2009 against the HPV virus, which can cause the cancer in women.
12. December - President Biden announces he’s pardoning all convictions of federal marijuana possession
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President Joe Biden announced Friday he's issuing a federal pardon to every American who has used marijuana in the past, including those who were never arrested or prosecuted.
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And there you have it – a year's worth of uplifting news! I hope these positive stories brought a bit of joy to your inbox. As I wrap up this special edition, I want to thank all my supporters!
Buy me a coffee ❤️
Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!
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mardmeehanabadi · 1 year ago
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ok im into Audible now
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woso-story · 28 days ago
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A Shoulder To Lean On
Alexia Putellas x Reader
Alexia Putellas stood in the empty locker room, the quiet hum of fluorescent lights her only company. The echo of her coach’s words still lingered in her mind. “You won’t be making the squad for the game this weekend, Alexia.”
She had expected it. Deep down, she knew she wasn’t ready. Her knee still felt like a ticking time bomb. It wasn’t just the physical pain anymore; it was the mental battle. Every time she planted her foot, her mind flashed back to the moment of injury, the sharp sting, the helplessness. She had worked her entire life for this—everything had been for this moment. But now, standing here, she couldn’t shake the feeling of doubt. The pressure was suffocating.
It wasn’t just about the injury. It was everything. Two Ballon D’Ors, countless trophies with Barcelona, but it never felt like enough. People expected more. She was expected to be the same Alexia she had always been: the unstoppable force, the leader. But in this moment, she was just a woman with a broken knee and a heart full of worry.
Her father’s voice echoed in her mind. "You’re meant for greatness, Alexia." But her father had never seen her play for Barcelona’s first team. He passed away just two months before her dream came true.
“Everything for him,” she whispered under her breath as she slowly gathered her things.
It wasn’t the game that bothered her, or the squad decision, it was the thought that she might not be able to get back to the level she had once been. That she might not be able to play again. The thought gnawed at her, every day, every moment.
But then there was you.
You, the one person who had been there through it all. The quiet strength beside her, the calm amid the storm. You had been together for over two years, and you weren't involved in football at all. It was a relief. After hours on the pitch, in front of cameras, after facing the demands of the Spanish Football Federation, you were a reminder of something normal, something simple.
Alexia walked into your shared apartment, the familiar scent of lavender filling the air. She saw you sitting on the couch, a cup of tea in hand, a soft smile tugging at your lips when you saw her.
“How was training?” you asked, though you already knew the answer. You could see it in Alexia’s eyes.
Alexia sighed, dropping her bag by the door. “I didn’t make the squad for this weekend’s game.”
You set the cup aside and patted the space beside you on the couch. “I’m sorry. But you’re doing the right thing, Lex. You know that, right?”
Alexia nodded, though the weight of it all was heavy on her chest. She wanted to argue, to say that she was ready, that she could fight through it. But deep down, she knew it wasn’t true. The knee was still fragile, and her mind... her mind was even more fragile.
Without a word, Alexia collapsed into your side, burying her face in your shoulder. And then, something happened that Alexia never expected. She felt the tears start to fall.
The floodgates opened, and all the emotions she had been suppressing poured out. She cried about the pressure, the expectations, the constant feeling that she had to be perfect. She cried about her knee, about the fear that she might never be the player she once was. She cried about her father, about how she had worked so hard to make him proud, only to have him taken from her before he could see her dreams come true.
"I don’t know if I can do it anymore,” she whispered, her voice breaking. “What if I’m not good enough anymore? What if my knee can’t take it? What if I’m letting everyone down?”
You held her, your arms wrapping around her tightly, offering comfort without words. You let her cry, let her release the weight of the world that had been pressing down on her for so long.
“Lex,” you said softly, once the tears had slowed. “You’re not alone. I’m here. We’re in this together.”
Alexia sniffled, grateful for your unwavering support. “But I’ve worked my whole life for this. I can’t just... give up.”
“You don’t have to give up,” you said, your voice firm but gentle. “You just need to give yourself time. Your knee will heal when it heals. You can’t rush it. And you don’t have to carry the weight of the world on your shoulders. You’re doing everything you can, and that’s enough.”
Alexia took a deep breath, feeling a little lighter, though the doubts still lingered. You always knew how to calm the storm inside her. You didn’t try to fix everything or offer empty reassurances. You just were there for her—a constant, steady presence, reminding her that it was okay to take a step back.
You stood, reaching out a hand to Alexia. “Come on, let’s go to bed. You need to rest.”
Alexia allowed herself to be led to the bedroom, her body heavy with exhaustion. She lay down on the bed, curling up under the soft blankets. A few minutes later, you returned with a steaming cup of tea and a small sandwich.
“You need to eat,” you said, setting the tray down next to her. “You can’t keep skipping meals.”
Alexia managed a small smile, grateful for the care that you always showed. She took a bite of the sandwich, sipping the tea slowly, feeling the warmth seep into her body.
After she finished, you crawled into bed beside her, wrapping an arm around her. Alexia nestled her head into your chest, the rhythmic beat of your heart soothing her racing mind.
“I don’t know what I’d do without you,” Alexia murmured, her voice muffled by your shirt.
“You’ll never have to find out,” you replied softly, your fingers threading through Alexia’s hair. “I’m always here. Always.”
Alexia’s eyes fluttered shut, the weight of the day still pressing on her, but the comfort of your embrace made it bearable.
As she drifted off to sleep, you kissed the top of her head. “You’re not alone, Lex. We're in this together. And I’ll be right here, no matter what.”
And for the first time in weeks, Alexia allowed herself to believe that things would be okay. She wasn’t alone in this fight.
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togglesbloggle · 1 year ago
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Why do you think tumblr will die in only a few years?
Answer with jargon: a strong correlation between recent economic shifts and chaotic choices by major tech companies is most easily explained if the 'traditional' social media platforms of 2005-2020 are mostly a zero-interest rate phenomenon.
Longer answer, with less jargon: Even though Musk's takeover is making all the headlines recently, the last year has in fact seen major shakeups at many social media platforms, so Twitter is actually part of a trend. Almost inevitably, these are cases of social media companies trying to find a way to squeeze more money out of their userbase (Reddit), cut costs dramatically (Twitter), or both. This marks a sudden departure from a much more relaxed attitude towards revenue in the Pictures Of Cats industry, where the focus was historically more on expanding the userbase to a global scale and then counting on world domination to sort of <????> and then the company would become profitable eventually.
We joke, correctly, that Tumblr has never been profitable. But the entire structure of ad-supported content curation between human users is deeply suspect as a business model; IIRC Twitter was never profitable either, and Facebook has been juicing its numbers in very shenanigany ways. Discord was actually making money on net last I checked, at least a bit, so they're not all completely in the hole. But even if you take the accounting figures at face value, none of these companies has anything like the amount of money that their cultural prominence would suggest. Instead, they're heavily fueled by investment dollars, money given by super-rich people and institutions in the expectation that fueling the growth of the company now will pay off with interest later.
So what changed?
I'm not an expert here, but I'll do my best to muddle through. The American Federal Reserve has one mandate that dominates all others (sometimes called the 'dual mandate'), and one primary tool that it uses to enforce that mandate. The goal is to maintain low (but nonzero) rates of inflation and unemployment, which in their models are deeply interlinked phenomena. The tool is 'rate hikes', or more specifically, tweaking the mandatory rate of interest that banks charge one another when making loans.
As a particular consequence of this, hiking the rate also means that bonds start paying out much better. When the rate hike goes through, that affects people who let the government borrow their personal cash- that is, people who buy bonds- as well as institutions like banks that lend to one another. A rate hike means that you, personally, can make a little extra money by letting the government borrow it for a while. The federal government of the US is a rock-solid low-risk choice for this kind of moneymaking scheme, so the federal interest rate sort of defines the 'number to beat'; to attract investors, a company has to give those investors money at a better percentage than whatever the feds are offering. Particularly since a company is a lot more likely to go out of business than the state!
To wrap this back around to the Pictures Of Cats industry: the higher the rate hike, the better your company needs to be doing (or the less risky it needs to be as an option) to attract big investment dollars. Very high rates make it very hard to convince people to invest in business activity rather than the government itself, and very low rates put moonshots and big dreams on the table, investment-wise, in a way that wouldn't otherwise be possible. Social media companies were one of these big dreams.
In the great financial crisis of 2008, the Fed took the dramatic step of reducing their rate to zero, trying to juice the economy back to life. And ever since then, they've kept it there. This has produced an unprecedented amount of funding for very crazy stuff; it's part of what has allowed so many weird new tech companies (Uber, streaming services, etc.) to get so much money, so quickly, and use that to grow to massive size without a clear model of how they're ever going to make money. This state of affairs kept going for quite a while, with no clear stopping point; that zero-interest environment has been one of the shadowy forces in the background that shaped fundamental contours and limits in how our Very Online World has grown and developed. Until COVID.
Or rather, the bounce back from COVID: we suddenly saw a massive spike in inflation and an incredibly strong labor market, as employees quit in record numbers, negotiated higher salaries, and found better work, and at the same time supply chain issues and other economy stuff caused prices to climb dramatically. Recall the Fed's 'dual mandate', to control the employment rate and inflation. This was, basically, kicking them right in the jooblies. They responded in kind, finally finally raising their rates for the first time in 15 years. For some of the people reading this, it'll be the first significant shift in their entire adult lives.
The goal, as I understand it, is to fight inflation by reducing the amount of outside investment into private companies, forcing them to hire fewer people and pay smaller salaries, ultimately drawing money out of the working economy and driving prices back down by lowering demand for everything. You get paid less, so you eat out less, and buy at cheaper restaurants when you do, so restaurants have to compete harder by lowering their prices; seems pretty dodgy to me as a theory, but it's the theory. And the first part will almost certainly work- companies are going to see less investment.
For social media companies that are still paying most of their salaries with investor dollars instead of revenues, this is especially catastrophic. Without outside investment, they're just a massive pile of expenses waiting to happen, huge yearly costs in developer salaries and server fees. This is why, all of a sudden, every social media company is suddenly making bonkers decisions. They're noticing that nobody wants to give them any more money! So they're trying to figure out how to live a lot more cheaply, to actually somehow for reals turn their giant userbases in to some kind of actual revenue stream, or both.
Tumblr is kind of the ur-example of this kind of thing, supporting a very large userbase with no coherent plan whatsoever to start paying its staff with our dollars instead of investors' dollars. When interest rates were low and Scrooge McDuck had nowhere else to hide his pile of gold coins, a crazy kid with a dream was the best alternative available to him. But now, unless something changes, he's going to notice he can just buy bonds instead, and that crazy kid can go take a hike.
That's why I think Tumblr is living on borrowed time, though I don't know how much. Like all cartoons, the economy doesn't really fall off a cliff until somebody looks down and notices they've been standing on thin air this whole time. But they always fall eventually; that's the gag.
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alexiabae · 1 year ago
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SIDELINES; alexia putellas x fem!reader
Summary: spain won the world cup. but she didn't care about it, she cares about the happiness that it brings to someone else.
Warnings: fluff. insecurities, brief mention of what happened last year with the Spanish federation. I wrote it a few weeks ago and I'm not sure if I want to update it. So before I regret and delete it, I give it an opportunity. Hope you like it, x.
Note: English is not my first language.
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It's over.
The referee whistles the final, indicating that Spain proclaimed the winner of the World Cup.
Y/N stopped running, her breathing accelerated by the intense 90+ minutes played. She put her hands on her waist, looking briefly at the stands where people started to celebrate their victory.
"¡HEMOS GANADO!" Jenni shouted happily while she wrapped her arms around Y/N's waist and lifted her, making the girl squeal a little.
"Put me down!" Y/N demand immediately, moving her legs on air.
Jenni laughed, putting her down again and kissing her head a few times. "We won kiddo." The brunette whispered, before she let her and went to another part.
Y/N rolled her eyes by her antics and soon her gaze found her England teammate devastated and walk towards the player, wrapping her arms around her waist from behind and leaning her head on her back.
"I'm really sorry..." Y/N muttered, hugging the woman more.
Lucy let out a watery laugh, looking briefly at the girl behind her. "I know... But it's football, you all deserve it." She said between tears, bringing her right hand to Y/N's head, caressing affectionately. "Why don't you go and celebrate with your team?" She asked, knowing internally why because the girl confessed to her a few months ago.
Y/N let out a tired sight. She looks to where most of her teammates are, and her eyes watered, shaking her head. "I regret it, Lucia." She admitted in a low voice, using Lucy's full name.
In another moment, Lucy would scold her for using her full name, but she knew that right now wasn't the moment. Then, she turned around and wrapped her arms around her neck, hiding both of them on the hug.
Lucy wants to say something comforting, but she can't. She said it in the past though. So the British separated a little from the hug and grabbed Y/N's face between her hands, she kissed her forehead.
"Go." Her teammate whispered, signaling with her head the side where Y/N's teammates are. When saw that she didn't move, Lucy pushed her softly. "Go, we will see soon. Celebrate and enjoy your holidays, I will text you and call you." She promised before walking to some of her teammates, knowing that Y/N doesn't walk to go over there.
Y/N looks again to where they are and she sees the beautiful sight that brings her in the first place. She started walking slowly towards there, consoling briefly some of the other team, she took a mental note to go to talk to Keira.
Irene was the first to notice her and run to hug her, lifting her from the floor. Why does everyone do that? Thought Y/N.
"Where were you? ¡SOMOS CAMPEONAS DEL MUNDO, Y/N!" Irene, like every teammate, shouts happily. She started spinning, making Y/N once again squeal.
"I was with Lucy. Please, put me down!" Y/N explained, begging her to hear her and put her down.
At the mention of their common friend, Irene put her down. For Y/N's relieved. She raised her gaze towards Lucy would be. Y/N saw how Irene has red eyes for crying. Happy tears.
"Shit, I'm going to search for her." Irene let her know, kissing the side of her head while putting a hand on her head, before she let go.
Y/N briefly sees Irene walk to the other side of the pitch, doing what Y/N did on the walk toward there, until her gaze moves again to the group next to her and sees the guilty, smiling, her cheeks stained from the tears. The Barça player bit her bottom lip, biting the involuntary smile that wanted to escape.
Then, the other noticed her. The woman made a gesture with her head, asking why she is standing on the spot while they are jumping and chanting. Or that was supposed Y/N she asked with a simple move of head.
"Come here, idiota." Alexia called, stretching her right arm towards her, moving her fingers in the air, still smiling.
Y/N couldn't resist anymore to be near her and accepting the hand that the other offered, intertwining it a few seconds. It saddened Y/N when the Catalan left her hand, but Alexia made her change the opinion when wrapped her right arm around her waist, a firm grip on her hip.
She was over the moon. She doesn't care what was the reason if Alexia could do that frequently. Y/N would do it if it was the award. She knew that it was another moment to remember the many times Alexia hugged her while Y/N lay on her bed while the sleepiness came to her. She would write it in a diary, but her mind was the replacement, she can vividly feel it.
Alexia turned her head towards Y/N, their head very close. "I'm proud of you." She said loudly, trying to be heard from the loud noise that their teammates are doing.
"I'm proud of you too." Y/N doesn't bother to raise her voice, if the brunette doesn't hear her, she reads her lips.
Alexia's dimples show up, showing more of her teeth for the reciprocal compliment. Y/N feels how the grip tightens briefly on her hip.
"That dribble was scandalous." Alexia inevitably said, leaning briefly on Y/N's ear to be heard.
Y/N shakes her head, smiling. "Can you please stop for a moment thinking football and enjoy?" She asked rhetorically, chuckling. She reposed her left arm on Alexia's shoulder, giving a soft pat.
"Sorry, you know how I am." The brunette apologized, shrugging.
It takes Y/N for surprise what Alexia made after. She knew that the Catalan is someone affectionate with people she cares about, but she always has the power to surprise her.
Alexia leaned again and kissed her cheek. It would be a few seconds, like one or two. But it remained for more seconds that it was obligatory for only two friends. Even she made a little pressure before she separated, starting to chant again.
But Y/N just looks at her distracted, not caring if someone sees her. She is enjoying Alexia, that's all that matters to her in that moment.
•••
After taking as many photos as possible with the trophy. They walked to the changing room, where the real party started.
Y/N doesn't mind it and goes to the showers. She felt strange, she remembered the last time she won a trophy, just two months ago and it didn't feel the same manner. Y/N celebrates it until the next day, not bothering to do the necessary personal things immediately, she just lives the moment. But right now... It's different and she knew it.
She knows that she didn't would accept it in the first place. But then, a person interfered with it. Explaining the reasons to why they all, need her on the team. And Y/N accepted. She was very conflicted, nights where she spent it crying with a lump on her throat.
"Stop thinking, I can hear you from here." Ona muttered on the other shower.
Y/N turned to look at her and saw how a reassuring smile played on her lips. "Why are you here and not celebrating?" She was confused, noticing Ona's wet hair.
The young Catalan leaned her arms on the wall and put her chin there. "I can ask you the same." She hummed, chuckling when Y/N threw her some drops of water with her fingers.
Ona watched her carefully while the other continued to shower. She knew that something happened to her, because from the start, Y/N was acting distant, light conversation and always on her mind.
"Something to say? Since you are looking too much." Y/N teased her, letting out a playful smirk.
"Why are you acting holding yourself?" Ona directly asked. She saw how Y/N froze on the spot, not waiting for that question.
Y/N's eyes watered, not caring anymore hold her tears in front of some teammates. Her demeanour changed, something that Ona noted immediately.
"Hey... Sorry. I shouldn't ask you..." Ona interrupted herself, grabbing her towel and after wrapping it on her body, she got out and went towards Y/N, grabbing the tower for the girl.
She wrapped it around Y/N's body and turned off the shower. "Let's go." Ona muttered, bringing the girl outside and sitting her on a bench. Soft sobs starting to escape from Y/N's mouth. The Catalan frowned, feeling a little guilty for probably being a hard topic for her. Even if she didn't really know what the problem was. She decided to put on the clean clothes that she brought before.
"Look at me." Ona whispered once she had her clothes on. She bent down and removed Y/N's hands from her own face, wiping with her thumbs the many tears rolling for her red cheeks. "I'm here, Y/N. If you don't want to talk about it right now, I understand. But please, you are holding it for many time that it is consuming you." The brunette whispered, passing an arm around her neck and leaning towards herself to hug her, while with her free hand caressing her back.
Y/N thought that Ona was right and for once, she decided to share her fears. After she relaxed a little and the hiccups remained from sobbing.
"I shouldn't come back to the national team." Y/N muttered, her head still on the crook of her neck, feeling a little brave since she can't see Ona's face.
Ona frowned and still caressing her back, she asked. "Why?"
"Because from the start, I wasn't coming... But-." Y/N stopped abruptly, fearing if she said too much, her secret would be out. But she trusted Ona.
"But?" Ona pressed softly, putting her chin on her head.
"Alexia talked to me." She finally let her breath out, the one she was holding.
"She talked to me too. I don't understand." Ona said confused.
Y/N let out a sigh. "I accepted even knowing that everything would be the same as before." She explained.
Ona's frown disappears slowly conforming she thought about it. "If I don't understand bad this time... The reason you are here is Alexia." She said it carefully, noticing how Y/N confirmed it with her head. A low sight escaped from Ona's mouth. "Since when?"
Y/N swallow. "I lost count." She whispered.
The Catalan felt shocked by this answer. She was waiting for a clear number. Not for her friend confessing to her that practically she is in love with Alexia from all the time they met.
The young defender separated herself a little and with both hands, she grabbed her face, looking directly to her eyes. "You will do everything for her, didn't you?" Ona guessed quickly, understanding now.
Y/N bit her bottom lip, nodding. "And for the first time I regret it. I failed my friends, Ona. It hurts." She started to cry again.
The other girl feels her pain. It's like if Y/N could pass her from her body and show her how she is feeling. And it is sad and scary.
"They understand, Y/N. They will not hate you." Ona tried to reason with her.
"Even though I don't deserve being here... There are a lot of better players than me. It's stupid." Y/N rants out, letting her walls down and showing how truly she feels.
"Don't say that!" Ona scolded her, looking at Y/N seriously. "You deserve it. You are one of the best players we have. Damn, you came from winning a Champions League. And you played every minute of this tournament, something I don't agree with because you aren't a robot." She made her point, a little mad with Y/N for saying that, better say, for believing that she isn't a good player. She knew that it was her insecurities talking for her, but she can't contain her madness. "You deserve it. Just like them." She says it this time in a sweet and caring voice, kissing her cheek repeatedly.
"Y/N! You are losi-," Alexia came to the shower room. The gold medal is still around her neck, a happy face adorned by a big smile that turned soon in a half open mouth and in her eyebrows installed a confused frown. She cleared her throat after recomposing a little. "Sorry to interrupt guys..." She awkwardly said, forcing a smile. Then, the woman tried to go but Ona called her.
When someone else entered the room, Ona separated from Y/N and put herself quickly in front of her to cover her. Clearly she knew that Alexia caught them in a compromised position, but a wrong one.
"Ale! Wait." She looked briefly at Y/N, who was wiping her cheeks fast and with her eyes begged at her friend to let it go. Ona sighed, a little conflicted but wanting the best for her friend. Maybe she didn't have to know everything, just the part she is struggling with right now. So, the Catalan raised her head to look at a serious and confused Alexia and spoke. "Y/N is bad. She needs you." She whispered, looking guilty at the floor.
After hearing these words came out from Ona's mouth, Alexia instantly worried. She decided to continue the way that she decided before to leave and closed the door, walking decisively towards the pair, stopping in front of Ona.
"I don't want to overstep because I know you. But I'm staying here until you're ready." Ale murmured, worry installed on her voice. She looks at Ona, their eyes meeting. With a simple gesture of her head asked her, but the answer was shrugging.
Y/N sniffled and stood up. She knew that Alexia would stay here until she knew everything. So she decided to put on the clothes, go to an empty shower and put it on quickly, matching Ona's wet hair down and after wiping some dry tears from her cheeks, she went outside, meeting the begging ones from the freckled girl. Y/N can't look at Alexia, it's like the brunette intimidated her right now. She can feel her eyes on her, watching every move she makes.
"I hate this..." Y/N muttered, letting aside her towel and sitting on a bench, putting both hands on her knees, a tired sigh escaping from her mouth. "I shouldn't pay you attention and stay with my decision. I spent two months with anxiety, sleepless nights, crying without anyone knowing and fighting the urge to call the girls to ask for their forgiveness." She explained in a low voice. I hate the act of whatever you say, I would do it..." She trailed off, more tears rolling for her cheeks, this time not caring.
Alexia was speechless, noticing how much in pain her friend is and she didn't notice. It hurt her. Her watery eyes wandered towards Y/N, seeing her small form on the bench. She was hugging her knees, hiding her head there. It broke Alexia's inside. Maybe her heart, or her soul. Or something else that she doesn't describe.
"I'm going outside." Ona whispered at her, biting her bottom lip and passing her arm for her eyes, grabbing her things and kissing Y/N's head before she went out.
The midfielder walked slowly towards the bench and sat down next to her, wrapping her left arm around her shoulders and pushing her softly toward herself, leaning her head on hers. Inevitably it was the first thing she did, because Y/N in pain or sad Alexia needed to fix it. It's a sentiment that she always did from their early friendship that remains until today. Alexia could fight the world only for Y/N giving her a tiny smile.
"You could say no. I would never be angry with you." Alexia whispered, looking at the white cold floor. "If I insist much it is because I wanted to play my last world cup with someone important to me." She confessed in a small voice.
Y/N sniffled, raising her head to look at her, making Alexia separated to meet her red eyes. "It's not your last world cup." She muttered in a hoarse voice.
The childish voice made Alexia paint a lipped smile. "Maybe." She opted to say. She leaned her head aside and brought her fingers to Y/N's face to put away a strand of hair. "Lo siento." She let down the first tears roll for her cheeks. It's weird that Alexia cried in public, it needed to be something really big to make her cry.
"Don't cry, please." Y/N begged, a pout on her face.
Muffled music was heard in the background, alongside many of them singing.
Alexia sniffled and shook her head smiling, looking at her. "I'm sorry for be blinded all this time..." She murmured, grabbing with both hands Y/N's ones, not intertwining, just holding it while she caress her palms. "But I'm here for you. I will always be for you." She whispers, passing her tongue for her bottom lip.
"Ale...?" Y/N calls her. Maybe this wasn't the right moment, but she has something to say right now. Even if the other rejects her. When Alexia looks at her expectantly, squeezing her hands to let her know that Y/N has all her attention, she takes a breath and speaks. "I feel things that I shouldn't have felt for you. When I look at you, whether you are paying me attention or not, I'm calm and nervous at the same time. I did things for you even if I don't wanted to do it, I'm not talking about this case, but from other occasions. I found myself remembering every little detail you have with me every night. I have been selfish to me and I shut up because you seem happy. I can't describe all I feel for you. But I'm in love with you, Alexia." Y/N finished to say.
For Alexia, there isn't a best description of it. Maybe it was a little messy, but it's real. She was taken by surprise, she can't deny that. Right now in her eyes, if Y/N pays the right attention, she could see the pure love on them.
"Sorry to be a distraction to this amazing moment. Maybe I needed to say it on another occasion..." Y/N whispered, standing up.
Alexia frowned, grabbing her wrist, standing up too. "Kiss me." She just simply said, firm.
Y/N opened her mouth, taken aback for what she said. The Catalan gave the few steps that separated from her, letting out her wrist to wrap both hands on her hips. "Don't make me repeat it."
It's when Y/N put both hands on her cheeks, looking at her mouth wishful but afraid if it is a joke or a product of her imagination. She leaned slowly, closing her eyes. Alexia leaned down, she was a little taller than Y/N, and met her lips.
A soft whimper escapes from Y/N's mouth, not believing that she is kissing Alexia. Her hands made pressure on Alexia's cheeks, bringing more towards her while she put herself on tiptoe. It's a chaste kiss, meeting the mould of their lips.
When they separated, Alexia opened her eyes and saw how Y/N was still with hers closed. A loving smile painted on her face, inevitably brushing her nose with hers and not letting time to the other to react, she captures her lips with hers, biting softly her lower lip.
Soon, their tongues met, deepening the kiss. Alexia tightened her grip on her waist, pressing her more into hers.
The foreheads are pressed against each other after they need to breathe again, silly smiles on their faces.
"Why do we stay here and keep kissing? I don't mind celebrating." Alexia whispered in Y/N's mouth.
Y/N intertwined her hands on her back of the neck. "I love that idea. But unfortunately, if they notice that we are missed, soon they will all start research for us."
"Right." The Catalan sarcastically said, rolling her eyes, already annoyed with her teammates. Y/N chuckled, adoring her reaction. She couldn't resist it and kissed her, making Alexia humming gladly.
They kissed a little more until they decided to come back with the team. Y/N watched with a loving smile how Alexia walked to the door, not believing anything what happened for a few minutes. Then, the midfielder turned around to look at her. "Are you coming?" A raised eyebrow accompanied the question with a knowing smirk.
Y/N grabbed her things and walked towards the door too, stopping to her side. "Thank you." She said sincerely and put herself on tiptoe, kissing her cheek for a few seconds.
"For?" Alexia whispered, seeing her separating from her. Y/N shrugged and gave her a lipped smile, walking out.
This time it was Alexia who watched how Y/N let her things on her bench and walked towards Ona and Tere.
"ALEXIA! Come here!" A happy Misa calls her with a beer on her right hand and another on her left, stretching it towards the brunette.
Alexia walked towards her, an involuntary smile on her face.
She won twice that day. And maybe she won every day that Y/N permitted her to pass by her side.
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samkerrworshipper · 1 year ago
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Hi how have you been?💗 Would you maybe consider writing some angst for Alexia/Barcelona x reader where like maps and Ingrid start start to notice reader getting thinner and eating less but Alexia is so wrapped up in media and stuff that she doesn’t notice until reader faints at training. Then Mapi shouts at alexia and there’s some angst but it has a softer ending? ❤️
i remember everything.
alexia putellas x reader
warnings: eating disorders, pain n angst with a softer ending.
Tumblr media Tumblr media
“Ale we’re losing her.”
Alexia hated a lot of things, winter, bad drivers, the colour orange, the Spanish federation, France, patchy makeup and cherry flavoured candy. The thing at the very top of her list though, was people telling her what to do. Alexia was the best player in the world, she was a force to be reckoned with, she did not need people telling her what to do with her life or relationships.
“Maria, she’s my fucking fiance, I would know if something was wrong with her, this is none of your business.”
Alexia was typing furiously at her phone, something that she seemed to always be doing lately. If you were lucky enough to catch her time for a few minutes, chances were her attention would end up being caught by replying to some email or text from her agent and manager. It was never ending, and anybody who had been a part of Alexia’s life before and after her had seen just how much her life had changed in the past two years. In this instance, Mapi and Alexia were out for drinks, trying to catch up but it was proving to be impossible with most of Alexia’s attention on whatever it was she was replying to this time.
“This is what I’m talking about, you don’t have enough time to talk face to face with your best friend, how does that prove to me that you have enough time to look out for your girlfriend?”
Alexia’s eyes rose from her phone, her fingers pausing.
“Maps, I know my fiance, I’d know if she had a eating disorder, I’d know if she was struggling, I lie in bed with her every night, I wake up with her every morning, I train with her everyday, I know her.”
Mapi’s eyebrow rose up at her forehead, it was weird for Alexia to meet her gaze, something she hadn’t experienced in a long time.
“When was the last time she was sick? When was the last time she burnt something in your kitchen? When was the last time your dog ran away? You wouldn’t know because every time those things have happened in the last few months she’s called me, because you’ve been out of town. You're busy, we all understand it, not everybody can be La Reina, not everyone is you, but not everybody is your fiance. Her smile that normally lights up the room, it’s not there anymore, nothing about her is the same anymore, and I’ll be damned if she dies on your watch because you are being too insolent to acknowledge it.”
Mapi stood up from her seat at the bar, downing the rest of her dirty martini and giving Alexia a final parting frown.
“Go home to your fiance and actually look at her, eye to eye, lover to lover, and try and tell yourself that she is fine.”
Mapi exited the bar, disgruntled by her failed attempt at an intervention with Alexia, the slightly older woman simply didn’t want to listen to her and what was Mapi supposed to do about that? Alexia was stubborn and bullheaded, but she was like Mapi’s sister, she was Mapi’s blood, more than anybody else. Mapi had no idea where she’d be without Alexia, possibly dead in a ditch somewhere. Alexia had been the fristr person to haul her out of bed on a bad day, drag her out of clubs when she was so drunk she couldn’t see straight, Alexia was tough love, she forced Mapi to live until Mapi herself wanted to live. Mapi was more than grateful, but she also wasn’t going to let the love of Alexia’s life slowly kill herself because Alexia was too consumed with her own career to even realise.
The drive home for Alexia was slow and stressful in a way she’d never experienced. Alexia in her heart wanted to believe Mapi was wrong, because how could she be right? Alexia saw you everyday, she knew you better than anybody else, and she hadn’t noticed any of the things that Mapi had been talking about.
When Alexia does get home it’s to a silent house with no lights on, something thats fairly regular for her, considering the abnormal hours she normally egts home at. She leaves her keys and coat at the front door, reaches down to pet Nala who she must have woken up because the fluff ball has major bedhead. Alexia pours herself a glass of water from the tap before cautiously making her way into your bedroom. When she does finally make it to the door it’s hanging open, you sat on the bed, the lamp being the only source of lighting whilst you read from underneath it. You look so peaceful, so perfect, that Alexia considers leaving, sleeping on the couch. But she’s too angry, too consumed with her feelings, too emotional to take into account how much her actions affect you. She figures that in the last few months she’s probably drifted from you more than she's come close, which is probably concerning considering that the months leading up to a wedding you are supposed to be in premarital bliss.
“You didn’t have to wait up.”
Alexia’s voice is even, she moves into your shared wardrobe, pulling off her slacks and crop top and searching for a pair of her pyjamas.
“How was your day?”
You sound so hopeful, so curious. This is the only time of day msot weeks that you get to talk to Alexia and when it’s not too late you try your hardest to stay awake, hopeful tat maybe this time Alexia will return your eagerness.
“Fine.”
Alexia finally finds her pyjama shirt and shorts and changes into them quickly before moving back inot the bedroom.
“O-kay, how are you, how was Mapi?”
There’s so much hope in your voice, something that Alexia hates. She lets her eyes roam your body quickly, discreetly, not in a way that would make you think she was trying to start anything. She doesn’t see anything different. She doesn’t notice the fact that you no longer wear short sleeves or cropped shirts anymore. She doesn’t notice that your ribs now jut out from your skin, instead of being covered by a healthy amount of skin and fat, how could she? She doesn’t notice the patches across your scalp that are now missing hair, she doesn’t know that you no longer get your period, she doesn’t notice that your nails are now brittle and crusty, something that you’ve come to hate about yourself, just another dot point on the list of things that you detest about your body.
“Good.”
Alexia’s one word answer hurt your soul, more than Alexia ever had.
“If you don’t want to talk you can just say that.”
Alexia doesn’t slip under the covers like she’d planned to, instead her jaw clenches and hardens, a defence mechanism of hers that you’d never manage to crack.
“What are you talking about, we’re talking, I’m just tired.”
Your face falls at her snap, your eyes falling back to your book and marking your page before dropping it down on your bedside table, a little huff leaving your lips as your eyes drift upwards to meet Alexias.
“Alright, you must be absolutely exhausted every single time we talk then.”
It’s bold, especially considering that Alexia seems to be in a completely rotten mood, but you can’t find it in yourself to care, because this is all she does and your becoming sick of it.
“Oh my god, I don’t come home every night just for you to make it seem like I’m a shitty girlfriend.”
It’s so Alexia, so Alexia to always somehow make herself the victim, somehow make it you who is the one in the wrong.
“Are you joking? You didn’t agree to come home to our house?”
Alexia moves herself further away from the bed, to the very edge, her eyes and jaw just as stubborn as each other.
“What do you want me to say? I’m tired, I want to sleep, not listen to you whine about whatever your fucking whining about, I’ve been in interviews all day and all I wanted to do was come home and sleep.”
Alexia was always in interviews, always doing something that was your fault, it wasn’t your responsibility to sort out her calendar, or to make her less of a good football player, it just happened to be the way the cookie crumbled.
“Okay, I’m sorry, I just had a really fucking bad qweek and I wanted to talk to you about it, because your supposed to be the fucking person I can talk to, but it’s fine, we can talk tomorrow, or next week, or next year, whenever your not tired.”
Alexia exhales, Mapi’s voice plays through her head, this is her in, this is her opportunity to not be such a fucking jackass.
“No, tell me about it.”
Anything you wanted to say, you swallow, it’s a hard job, but your suddenly so scared of Alexia, so scared that she’ll see you the same way you do, she’s never around to reassure you that you’re enough for her, and you honestly don’t feel like you are anymore.
“It’s fine, honestly sleep.”
You peel back the covers beside you, but Alexia stays still on the other end of the bed, just looking at you.
“You obviously want me to ask about it or you never would have brought it up.”
Alexia knows that it’s a dickhead move, but she’s at her wits end, she’s tired and your beginning to piss her off.
“Why do you make it seem like talking to me is a chore?”
Alexia has a schedule, and she figures sometimes talking with you is a chore, because Alexia doesn’t have time, some days talking to you is just another box for her to tick.
“How many times do I have to say that I’m fucking tired before you udnerstand?”
Alexia’s tone is so harsh, so angry, a tone she long ago promised herself she’d never use with you, ever. But right now every single rule she has for herself is being broken and when tears spring to the corners of your eyes she can’t help but feel guilty.
“If you’re so tired, go to sleep, I’ve told you that already, you’re starting an argument for no reason.”
Alexia cocks her head, trying to absorb what you’ve just said to her.
“Yeah, okay, whatever, I don’t want you fucking talking to me for the rest of the night though.”
Alexia never used to swear around you, or at you, but the part of her that was once so sweet and gentle with you is now gone, long forgotten under the facade that has become La Reina.
“Okay, I love you.”
It’s Alexia’s last chance, her last opportunity for redemption. You give her a few seconds, and when you get nothing in return your heart shatters.
“Please say it back Ale.”
Alexia’s face is emotionless, absolutely devoid of anything that made Alexia, Alexia. It reminds you as to why you are so scared to let people in, because of the damage they can do and the damage they can find. Alexia no longer seems concerned about any of those things, only concerned about herself.
“Alexia.”
She slips under the covers beside you, but her body and face is stock still, so stubborn, so hurt, so fucked up. It’s the final straw for you.
You pull the sheets away from your body, wrenching yourself up and out of the covers, tears streaming down your face as you rush into your wardrobe, pulling out whatever clothes are within arms reach and stuffing them into a bag.
When you emerge Alexia is looking equal parts concerned and shocked.
“Where the fuck are you going?”
In the moment, all you want is to be loved, feel loved, and it’s clear Alexia isn’t prepared to do any of those things.
“You need rest, I don't think either of us are going to get it whilst the other is in the house, I’m going to stay with Mapi for a few nights. When your ready to love me I’ll be there.”
With that you leave the bedroom, pick up your keys and drive into the darkness of the middle of the night, tears flowing freely down your face as the bleary night lights of Barcelona pass by.
It took every single bit of energy left in you to make it up the stairs of Mapi and Ingrid’s house, your knuckles pounding against their door until it swung open, to reveal Mapi and Ingrid, both looking like they’d just crawled out of bed and equally as shocked as each other.
It was then that you broke down, fat, big tears streaming down your face and sobs falling easily from your lips.
“I love her.”
There’s a silence so loud between the three of us as Mapi pulls you into a hug, Ingrid closing the door behind you and the two of them helping you into their house, pulling you into their bed and bringing you into a big hug. All you can do is focus on your breathing, in out, in out. Your hands tears at the broken skin and nails, you can’t manage to meet either of the womens eyes as you cry in their arms, they don’t seem to mind, they only tighten their grip on you.
“It’s okay hermosa, we’ve got you, we won't let go.”
You can’t do much more than cry, you're grieving your life, grieving your lover, grieving everything that you’d just lost in a matter of minutes. Your hearts torn to shreds, undecided about whether or not to let Alexia hold onto a breaking thread and risk the plummet. She’s given you absolutely nothing, no hope, no faith, no love and yet there she goes. She’s let you go. You're only feeling some of it, you know that there is going to be a day, not far away, where you're going to have to see her at training, laughing and smiling with your teammates, people who she’s loving through everything. You're losing her. You lost a version of her that was once so caring, who gave the warmest hugs. You’ve lost your 2 am conversations and your forever and always. You lost the person you’d promised you’d stay around till the very end with, if she hadn’t pushed you away, if she hadn't just loved you none of it would have happened. Alexia Putellas Segura was never yours to have though it seemed, she was for everyone else, the fans, the club, the country. Alexia Putellas was a thought, not a person.
There was a reason why you didn’t eat anymore, you’d become obsessed with trying to be perfect for Alexia, she hung out with models and super stars on the weekends, and yet you were just you. You were so unworthy of her love and attention that you couldn’t really blame her for falling out of love with you.
“She doesn’t love me, she never has.”
Maria hates it when those words leave your mouth, because it couldn’t be further from the truth, Alexia is just shit at showing you it. She knows that her bestfriend loves you more than anybody else in the world, that she would give up everything to be there for you, she just hasn’t noticed that you’ve needed that.
You sniffle into Ingrid’s chest, your fingers tapping against her thigh and your legs shaking from underneath you. You’ve never felt heartbroken before, Alexia has been your day one, and now it feels like you're just done, like everything the two of you have ever worked for together is just completely done.
“She loves you more than you know hermana, but she doesn’t deserve you if she’s going to continue to hurt you.”
Now that Mapi has you in her arms, she can feel just how much smaller you are, how much you’ve shrunken and how emaciated you are. She internally curses Alexia and her stubbornness, the world is so loud that Alexia Putellas has become deaf to your needs, to your happiness. Sometimes her best friend is one of the most impressive people she’s ever met and sometimes she’s just stupid, stupid for letting the love of her life feel so worthless and stupid for letting you walk out the door, something that could be the stupidest decision of her life.
You're positively exhausted, and it doesn’t take much of Ingrid’s back rubs and comforting Norwegian words that you don’t understand for you to be lulled into a painful sleep.
As soon as the two are certain your asleep the move you into the middle of the bed, Mapi looking over the top of you concernedly at Ingrid.
“She needs helps.”
Ingrid can’t find any part of her brain that disagrees with her other half.
“She needs Alexia to take her foot out of her ass and be present.”
Mapi nods her head, her eyes falling to your own face, even in your sleep you lok disturbed, your eyebrows knitted across your skin and a deep frown on your lips.
“Si, well if Alexia won’t then we have to, she needs to know she’s loved. She’s lost so much weight elksling, she hasn’t been eating or looking after herself.”
Ingrid nods, equally worried as her girlfriend about the health of their bestfriend.
“Get some sleep, we’ll figure it out in the morning.
When the two women wake to find you missing from their bed, it takes a search of their apartment to find you deep asleep in their spare room, neither of them question it. They make you breakfast, you don’t eat it, insisting that you're feeling nauseous. When they try to talk about Alexia you shut them down, you’ve created a mental fortress, one that Alexia and your health and emotions aren’t apart of. They invite you to stay with them for the foreseeable future, and you can’t find any reason to say no.
The following days leading up to the first pre-season training are all the same, you hardly sleep every night, sitting up late out on their porch and waking up at the crack of dawn. Mapi knows that your health is teetering dangerously, you hardly eat, you only leave the house to workout, you are a skeleton of a human being. Mapi doesn’t know what to do, you don’t care about anything anymore, or maybe you care so much that it’s all being numbed out.
It’s the first training session when everything turns to shit. She’d found you balling your eyes out in a change room cubicle beforehand, as soon as you’d spotted Mapi you’d pulled yourself together, terrified of being vulnerable in front of her. It only got worse though when you stepped out of the tunnel and onto the field, to be faced with Alexia, standing casually on the field, chatting with a few of your teammates. Your heart plummeted at the sight of her, the woman that you’d made so tired, so unhappy, laughing and messing about with your teammates. You pushed Mapi away when she tried to comfort you, walking straight to the sideline of the pitch to start your warm up. You made it through half of it, your body hurt though, in a way that it never had before. You only made it through one of your sprints before you were face planting into the turf, your whole body completely done. Your bones sunk into the grass, your body just giving up.
It was Mapi who made it to you first, flipping you over, her eyes searching your unconscious face. She knew this was going to happen, knew it was only so long before your body stopped letting you overwork it.
“Alexia.”
Mapi screamed at the top of her lungs, desperate to draw anyone's attention, specifically your fiance, or ex fiance. Everyone turned to face the two of you, Mapi knelt down on the turf, rocking your body back and forth as she tried her very hardest to awaken you, a task that was proving to be unsuccessful. The whole team rushed forward, Alexia at the front of the pack, collapsing beside Mapi on the ruf, taking your head in her hands and shaking it furiously.
“Someone get a medic, y/n, come on, wake up for me, get up.”
There was more emotion in Alexia’s voice than Mapi had heard in months. Mapi hated that it took you passing out for Alexia to care, and suddenly her protective older sister instinct kicked in, pushing Alexia away from you, taking her hands and distaching them from your unconscious body.
“Get the fuck away from her? She has to be unconscious for you to give a fuck? This is your fault, you let it get this bad, if you actually loved her you would have realised ages ago, but you don’t do you? You don’t love her like she deserves, you only love her when it’s convenient for you?”
The words bring tears to Alexia’s eyes, Mapi’s words awaken something in her, a realisation that she’s right, Alexia has given a blind eye to you and now you were seriously hurt because of it. She scrambled away from your body, suddenly overly aware of just how much she’d hurt you. She pushed herself out from the group, running away from all of them, running away from you, running away from her problems, running away from her life that she’d fucked up so badly.
One of the girls had called 112, clawing Mapi away from your unresponsive body as the medics tended to you, plastering a oxygen mask on your face that was far too big, sitting wrongly on your bony face. They loaded you up onto a stretcher, your cold body attached to more cords than you had extremities.
Mapi managed to fit herself into the ambulance with you, clutching your hand the whole drive to the hospital, praying to herself to let you be okay, to let everything work itself out.
When you woke up it was painful. Your eyes blinked furiously as they tried to focus on anything besides the infuriating white light that was clouding your vision. It took a few seconds for your senses to kick in, but once they did it only hurt more. The sound of constant beeping, movement and noise pollution crowding you ears. It was then that you spotted Mapi and Ingrid at your bedside, your eyes darting furiously between the two as the blood rushed to your ears to protect you from the overstimulating noise that was crowding your brain.
Mapi stood up, her hand intertwining with yours. She was trying to speak to you, but you couldn’t hear anything, your ears making you practically deaf. Mapi held your hand and it seemed to be enough, enough to tell you that everything was okay, or as okay as it could be. Slowly your anxiety slipped out from under you, and your hearing came back, allowing you to focus on what Mapi was saying to you.
“Hey sweetheart, it’s all okay, your okay, take some deep breaths for me.”
Your eyes darted to the IV’s and cords that were connected to you, the feeding tube that went through your nose and down your throat, the oxygen cannula that also rested on your nose, the countless IV’s that were connected to your arm, making it far harder to move your arm at all.
“What happened?”
Your words were choken, your throat dry from lack of liquids. Mapi solved this problem, reaching to your bedside and lifting a glass of water to your lips, you took tentative sips, the water soothing your dry throat.
“You passed at training, malnutrition and dehydration. The doctors think that you’ve been struggling with anorexia for a little while, that you haven’t been eating properly.”
Suddenly everything stopped for you, the words leaving Maria’s mouth making you gulp on nothingness. It felt like you were being choked, big imaginary hands wrapping around your throat, preventing you from saying anything in your defence. It felt like your organs were all eating each other up in your stomach, a uneven discomfort spreading across your torso.
“Nobody is judging you, you’ve been through a really tough time, what matters most now is getting you back to being healthy and happy. Barca is in full support of what you want to do, you have lots of options, inpatient, out patient, moving in with Ingrid and I fully.”
You didn’t want any of those things, you wanted Alexia and it hurt for you to admit that.
“I want Ale.”
Maria frowned at your words, she was still furious with Alexia.
“I don’t think that's a good idea, you deserve better then her hermosa.”
It hurt you to hear Mapi regard Alexia so lowly, when a few weeks ago Alexia had been her best friend in the entire world.
“I want to see Alexia, I know she’s here, let me see her.”
Ingrid stood up, walking out the door of your room and out into the waiting room, retrieving a particularly heart broken blonde from the room and dragging her into your room.
The way your face lit up when you saw Alexia made Mapi feel sick, she wasn’t going to let Alexia hurt you again like she had.
Alexia’s cheeks were tearstained, her eyes distant as they met yours. It hurt her in ways she could never explain, seeing you looking so lifeless in a hospital bed, you were conscious, but all life had been drained from your body, you truly looked like a skeleton.
“Mapi, give me and Alexia a minute will you?”
Mapi looked like she was about to argue, but Ingrid’s hand on her wrist, tugging her out of the room was enough of a distraction, the Norwegian woman closing the door behind the two of them.
“I’m so sorry, I was such a bad girlfriend-.”
You stopped Alexia grovelling by lifting your hand.
“You fucked up, you hurt me more than I’ve ever been hurt before. It fucking sucked Alexia, never seeing you and when I did see you, you were always on the phone or tired or not in the mood. I understand that you are very busy, and that you can’t control your schedule, I’m not having a go at you for that, you are allowed to be tired. I’m pissed off because I was struggling, really fucking struggling and all you gave a shit about was yourself, you don’t understand how stressful it is to explain what’s going on in your head when you don’t even understand it yourself. You are supposed to be my person, the person I can ask and tell anything and you didn’t want to be that and I detested you for that. I can’t do it anymore, I can’t spend everyday hating you, because this is what it does to me. I can’t live without you, but I also can’t live beside a version of you that doesn’t love me like I deserve. I want to try us, I want to try again, because if I stand even a chance at keeping myself alive and being happy whilst doing it, it’s going to be in your arms, but I need you to understand that, I need you to understand that you need to be here for me, regardless of what’s going on in your life. You know I’m proud of you, I’m your biggest supporter, so right now I need you to be that for me.”
Alexia nodded like a goldfish at you, more tears flowing freely down her face.
“How bad is it?”
You bit down on your lip, everything that made Alexia, La Reina was gone, all of her barrier broken down, so that the only person standing in front of you was your Ale, the Ale you loved so very much.
“It’s not good, I haven’t been looking after myself in a long while, Anorexia they say. They want me to go into outpatient or inpatient, or move in with Mapi. I don’t want to do any of those things, I just want to be with you, happy with you, with you there to look out for me, I just need you to commit to that for me.”
Alexia nodded quickly, her head shaking furiously as her blonde hair swished back and forth beside her head.
“Please, if you’ll have me. I’ll take time off, whatever you need, I’m here for it all, I’ll spend everyday for the rest of our lives making it up to you, I promise, please just let me love you.”
You patted down on the space beside you on the bed and Alexia hesitantly sat down on the space, hovering on the bed, making sure she wasn’t touching you, not wanting to make you feel uncomfortable. You were starved though, starved of everything that you’d been missing the last few weeks, you reached out for her, pulling her to sit beside you on the bed, your head coming to rest against her stiff form. It took a few seconds to get her to relax, but when she did she lifted her hands up to your thin hair, carding her fingers gentle through it, trying her hardest not to notice the amount of hair that was falling out as a result of your health problems.
“I love you Ale.”
Alexia was so focused on you, that she didn’t even really hear the words.
“Ale, say it back.”
Your stern tone seemed to awaken her, she pointed her head down to yours, pressing a gentle kiss to your forehead and murmuring,
“I love you mi amor, more than you will ever know,”
It calmed your soul, a part of your heart that you didn’t know existed finally resting, enough to let you slowly drift off on Alexia’s chest, allowing you to sleep better than you had in months. Alexia found herself following you, the sight of you finally relaxed making her so much more content.
That was how Mapi and Ingrid found the two of you, sound asleep on your hospital bed. Mapi was a little bit annoyed at how easily you’d forgiven Alexia, but she couldn’t find it to be mad at the Catalan for very long, approving of how happy you looked at rest in her arms.
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a-book-of-creatures · 1 year ago
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And since I just reposted something about Animorphs, here's more required reading - K. A. Applegate's letter to the fans after the series ended. Removing spoilers just in case because you need to go out there and read every one of the 60 or so books.
Dear Animorphs Readers: Quite a number of people seem to be annoyed by the final chapter in the Animorphs story. There are a lot of complaints that [spoilers]. That there was no grand, final fight-to-end-all-fights. That there was no happy celebration. And everyone is mad about the cliffhanger ending. So I thought I'd respond. Animorphs was always a war story. Wars don't end happily. Not ever. Often relationships that were central during war, dissolve during peace. Some people who were brave and fearless in war are unable to handle peace, feel disconnected and confused. Other times people in war make the move to peace very easily. Always people die in wars. And always people are left shattered by the loss of loved ones. That's what happens, so that's what I wrote. [spoilers] That doesn't by any means cover everything that happens in a war, but it's a start. Here's what doesn't happen in war: there are no wondrous, climactic battles that leave the good guys standing tall and the bad guys lying in the dirt. Life isn't a World Wrestling Federation Smackdown. Even the people who win a war, who survive and come out the other side with the conviction that they have done something brave and necessary, don't do a lot of celebrating. There's very little chanting of 'we're number one' among people who've personally experienced war. I'm just a writer, and my main goal was always to entertain. But I've never let Animorphs turn into just another painless video game version of war, and I wasn't going to do it at the end. I've spent 60 books telling a strange, fanciful war story, sometimes very seriously, sometimes more tongue-in-cheek. I've written a lot of action and a lot of humor and a lot of sheer nonsense. But I have also, again and again, challenged readers to think about what they were reading. To think about the right and wrong, not just the who-beat-who. And to tell you the truth I'm a little shocked that so many readers seemed to believe I'd wrap it all up with a lot of high-fiving and backslapping. Wars very often end, sad to say, just as ours did: with a nearly seamless transition to another war. So, you don't like the way our little fictional war came out? You don't like [spoilers]? You don't like that one war simply led to another? Fine. Pretty soon you'll all be of voting age, and of draft age. So when someone proposes a war, remember that even the most necessary wars, even the rare wars where the lines of good and evil are clear and clean, end with a lot of people dead, a lot of people crippled, and a lot of orphans, widows and grieving parents. If you're mad at me because that's what you have to take away from Animorphs, too bad. I couldn't have written it any other way and remained true to the respect I have always felt for Animorphs readers. K.A. Applegate
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worldwrapfederation · 2 years ago
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Yung Miami Reveals She's Bisexual And Says She Wants Megan Thee Stallion
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wosoimagines · 1 year ago
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Celebrations - Vivianne Miedema/Reader
prompt: Arsenal celebrates Viv finally making her return from her ACL injury.
warnings: none
words: 4587
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(Y/N) POV
I grinned as I wrapped my arms around Viv’s waist as I picked her up to spin her around. Viv scoffed in my arms before I put her down. She shook her head at me as I only followed behind her.
“Come on, Viv! Be excited! You’re back!” I cheered. Viv only rolled her eyes. “Come on, darling. It’s been three hundred and eleven days. You’re allowed to get excited and celebrate coming back.”
“We’ll celebrate when I actually get subbed onto the pitch,” Viv said.
I shrugged at that. I knew that Viv had been nervous about coming back, but I had been there every step of the way to assure her that she was going to be okay. I had missed getting to play with Viv for so long now and I knew that Jonas was going to sub her on even if it was just for a few minutes.
I wasn’t the only one who couldn’t keep my excitement in. Katie was right there with me. Not that it surprised any of us since Katie was consider the president of Viv’s fan club.
Honestly, I was just really looking for when Viv would finally get to start again. I couldn’t wait to play with her in the starting eleven again.
“Schatje,” Viv called out. I paused my animated retelling of my most recent trip home to turn to Viv. I grinned when Viv motioned in front of her. “Come sit.”
I abandoned my storytelling as I made my way over to where Viv was before I felt her running her hands through my hair so that she could pull it up for me. It was a small thing we had started after Viv realized how nervous I got before games during my first season with Arsenal.
It wasn’t long before Katie came to sit in front of me so that the two of us could talk about how excited we were for our national team camps that would be coming up. Everyone would be flying out the next morning to get to their respective camps.
While I couldn’t wait to go home and see all my national teammates, I was a bit bummed out that Viv wouldn’t be able to come watch my games this time around as she would finally be back with the Dutch National Team. Viv had assured me that she would still make time to watch my matches though as I promised to watch hers as well.
“What are you most excited for, (Y/N)?”
“Tobin and Christen said they’d come out to catch the second game since it’s in San Diego,” I said with a grin.
It was no secret that Tobin and Christen had taken me under their wing when I joined the national team. My Arsenal teammates had been surprised though when I had finally convinced Tobin to join Arsenal and they had seen just how close the two of us were. But I hadn’t had much of a chance to see the two while preparing for the World Cup and helping Viv rehab, all the while both Tobin and Christen were dealing with their own injuries.
“You must miss them, huh?” Katie asked as she nudged my foot with her own. “All of your national teammates?”
My situation was a bit different from everyone else’s on the team, it seemed. Pretty much everyone else at Arsenal had someone from the same country as them on the team. Or they at least knew someone who was playing the WSL that they knew from their national team.
Lindsey was my closest teammate and even then, she was in France. Well, I guess that I did have Catarina Macario and Mia Fishel both were still so new to the team that I wasn’t that close to either of them. I was closer to Jessie Flemming than I was to either of them.
“Yeah, I really do miss them,” I nodded. I hadn’t been called up for our September friendlies after I had been publicly critical of Vlatko and the USSF for keeping him around for so long, but the federation knew that they would only be able to keep me off the team for a short amount of time before there was clear outcry to have me back. “Besides, Becky’s going to be back in camp, so we’ll finally get Captain America back on the field. Maybe we’ll get her to finally score too.”
“Yeah, good luck with that,” Katie said.
Viv pressed a kiss to the top of my head before she moved from where she was sitting. I let Katie help me up before the two of us had headed out to get lined up since we were both starting today.
While we were waiting in the tunnel I couldn’t help as I kept bouncing on my heels. This should be a good game for us after all. Plus, we had a celebration dinner planned for after the game for Viv’s return.
The second the whistle blew to start the match I knew that it was going to be a rough one. Not that it completely surprised me, Bristol hadn’t won a match yet this year and no one ever wanted to start the season off with four losses so they would try their hardest to stop that from happening. That meant targeting Alessia and staying on my back as well.
Honestly, it was a pretty smart tactic. Alessia’s temper could almost rival Katie’s and that was saying something. If they could draw Alessia into getting a yellow, or even a red, it would shift the game.
There was just one major detail that Bristol was forgetting.
We’ve got McCabe.
Katie scored a banger in the seventh minute giving us the advantage that we had all expected to have.
But it was just two minutes later that the advantage came crashing down.
I had made a run for the ball but struggled to get my balance as I had taken a small shove from one of the Bristol players that sent me crashing to the ground. I had heard the dreaded pop our recent ACL squad at Arsenal had described as I hit the ground. I was immediately clutching at my knee even as play continued around me.
Katie was the first one to realize that I was actually hurt as I hadn’t gotten up yet. She was quick to fight to get the ball back before kicking it out so that the play would stop. She was also the first one over to me.
“Please, tell me it’s your ankle,” Katie said as she knelt on the ground next to me. I clenched my teeth as I shook my head. “(Y/N), please tell me it’s something other than your knee.”
“I’d love to,” I said, causing Katie to let out a sigh of relief. It was always worrying, no matter what color jersey a player wore, when they went down because it seemed like a majority of injuries these days were ACL injuries. “But it’s definitely my knee.”
“Okay,” Katie nodded. I saw her briefly turn to signal for a sub so I could go off. “It’s gonna be okay. Maybe it isn’t that bad.”
“Yeah, maybe.”
I wasn’t surprised by our other teammates coming to check on me or how Kim also stayed close.
“Just a sprain, yeah?” Katie suggested. I glanced up to see that Kim didn’t look super confident in that possibility. “Or just a hyperextended knee? So long as you didn’t hear a pop there’s a chance it isn’t your ACL. Did you hear a pop?”
My eyes caught where Viv was standing on the sideline. I couldn’t let her stand there and worry about me. Not when we were supposed to celebrate her return.
The trainers were close enough to us that they were able to hear our conversation.
“I didn’t hear a pop or feel one,” I assured Katie. I knew that Irish woman would be angry with me when the news did come out because I was already certain that it was my ACL, but I refused to be the reason that Viv’s night was ruined. “I’m sure these guys will take good care of me and have me back on the field in no time.”
Katie nodded as the trainers moved next to me. Kim grabbed ahold of Katie’s arm to pull her up.
“Come on, Katie,” Kim softly coaxed the Irish woman. “(Y/N) will be all right. Let’s get out of the way and let the trainers do their thing.”
Katie hesitated but I smiled at her and nodded so she went with Kim while I let the trainers help roll me over. I brought my hand to cover up my mouth so that no one would be able to read my lips.
“It definitely popped,” I admitted behind my hand. The trainers froze at that because I had just told Katie that it didn’t. “Don’t tell the team. I don’t want to ruin Viv’s night with my own torn ACL.”
“You sure?”
“I heard it and felt it pop. It’s definitely torn.”
The trainers nodded before they moved to load me on the stretcher. I knew that it was something that had become precautionary with all the severe knee injuries so many players had been through recently.
They carried me off the field, but I let them stop so that Viv could check on me once we reached the tunnel, so it was a bit more private. I sent her a soft smile as she crouched so that she was at my height as she cupped my face.
“Your knee?” Viv asked.
“I doubt it’s that serious. It doesn’t feel that bad, I promise,” I assured her. I couldn’t help how the guilt gnawed at me as I said the words because I knew that she would be upset and worried when she did find out that my ACL was torn. “They’re just taking me out on the stretcher as a precaution. I’ll be back from the hospital for dinner. Right, guys?”
There was a course of yeses from the trainers.
Viv sighed as she nodded her head before pressing a kiss to my forehead.
“I’ll see you later, Schatje.”
“Hey,” I said as I reached out and grabbed a hold of her wrist when she went to walk away. I grinded my teeth together at the aching pain that came from my knee at the slight movement. Viv bit her lip at my reaction. “I’m going to fine, okay? Tonight’s about you. I know that Jonas is going to get you on the field, and I know that it isn’t going to be how we planned it with both of us being on the field, but, Viv, you deserve to be back out there. Enjoy that, yeah?”
Viv slowly nodded her head, and I gave her one last small smile before I kissed the back of her hand and let her go.
“No one tells Jonas until after the team has gone out,” I said once Viv was out of hearing range.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“You okay, kid?”
“I’m fine.”
Becky had been the first to call me. I had seen all the texts that my national teammates had sent me, but Becky was the one I had answered first. I was hesitant to text Tobin or Christen back. I knew that they would call me as soon as they knew I was out of the hospital, but I didn’t know how long I would last talking with them on the phone before I broke down.
Tobin and Christen weren’t just my team moms. They were my safety net. They had been the ones I went to when my anxiety about playing started to get to me. They were the ones who had convinced me to finally ask Viv out and they had been there through the hardest times in my life. But this was one of the worst setbacks I had, and it was at the worst time with the Olympics only nine months away.
I didn’t even know how long I would make it before asking Tobin and Christen to fly over to help me out while Viv was away at camp. I knew that they would do it too, but I couldn’t help but feel guilty for even thinking about asking them when they both had so much on their own plates already.
“How bad is it?”
I froze at the question. I, logically, knew that Becky would be the one they’d have call me to get information about my injury since she was our team captain, and we were in between coaches at the moment.
“My ACL is torn,” I admitted. I ran a hand over my face as I stayed in the car that was sitting outside the restaurant. Kim had stuck around to wait for me to get back to London Coloney with a couple of trainers. I had assured her that I was fine and that I just had to call Becky to give her an update so she could tell our national team. “I don’t even know what I’m going to do about surgery. Viv’s supposed to head to her own national camp tomorrow. But the longer I put it off, the longer I’ll have no idea what my timetable to return would look like.”
“Okay, you talk it over with Viv and get a gameplan with the medical staff at Arsenal and keep me updated.”
I knew that would be the next step. I sighed as I looked at the restaurant entrance. I wasn’t going to ruin Viv’s celebration so our talk would have to wait until after dinner. It really was unfortunate that we had to have such a quick turnaround between our game tonight and the national camps that everyone was leaving for tomorrow.
“Hey, Becky?” I called out before she could hang up the phone. “I know the federation wants you to report back to them tonight, but do you think it can wait until tomorrow?”
“Kid, they need to know as soon as possible.”
“I know, but it was Viv’s first game back from her ACL. I didn’t let her know how bad it was when they took me off. I didn’t tell her that I heard the pop,” I explained. Viv deserved to be able to celebrate this without having to worry about me. “I just want her to be able to celebrate finally getting back on the field for a game. I’m going to tell her tonight, but I want to be the one to do it. Not the team breaking the news.”
“Okay, but I call them at eight o’clock tonight,” Becky relented. I nodded in relief even though she couldn’t see me. “That’s like four hours. So, you make sure you tell her before then.”
“I will. I promise.”
We wrapped up our conversation as I made her promise to let the rest of the girls know that I missed all of them and I was upset that I wouldn’t be there to see them but that I trusted that they would win without me.
I took a moment to compose myself before I grabbed the crutches from the back of the car to head into the restaurant. I was slower to get back to the private room where the others already were. I could see the worry in my teammates faces when they saw the crutches. But my eyes met with Viv’s as I ignored our teammates.
Viv’s eyes darted down to the knee that I had hurt as she immediately started to fidget with the rings on her fingers. I started to make my way toward her before I took a seat next to her. Once I had the crutches leaned against the wall that was behind us, I grabbed ahold of her hand.
“It’s fine. Just hyperextended,” I assured her. Viv’s shoulders dropped in relief. “Doc said to get rest and the trainers will reevaluate next week to see how it’s looking. I’ll be back on the field in no time. I promise.”
Viv smiled at that as she gave my hand a tight squeeze. The guilt hit me hard as I watched the worry disappear from Viv’s eyes. I knew it was cruel to give her this false hope, but I didn’t want to ruin this for her.
“Great! That means you’ll be back with us in no time!” Katie cheered. I shook my head as Viv and I both turned to look at her. “Just too bad you won’t be going to national camp now.”
I rolled my eyes. I didn’t need to think about that right now. Especially because it still hadn’t really hit just yet that I was going to be missing out on seeing some of my best friends for the second camp in a row.
“Just wait, McCabe. Once Beth, Viv, and I all get back on the field, it’ll be your spot that I take, and you’ll be the one riding the bench.”
Katie gasped at that before she pretended that I had actually hurt her. I couldn’t help but smile as Viv laughed at Katie.
As our night moved along, I found myself forgetting about the injury I had just sustained and instead lost myself in the celebration. It wasn’t even anything big we did for Viv. We didn’t even focus too much attention on her, but Viv honestly did love being around the rest of the team.
While she hadn’t been completely separated from the team during her injury and rehab, she had missed getting to spend as much time as she was used to with the rest of the team. I had also been careful to limit how much either of us committed to team bonding nights, especially when it was game nights knowing that as much as she pretended to hate the games, Viv was one of the most competitive people I knew, and she would have been upset by the number of games she couldn’t join in.
It was nice to see her enjoying herself with the rest of the team.
Aside from being the newest one on the team to be injured, today was amazing. Even as dinner was winding down and some of our teammates started to make their leave. Katie assuring both Viv and I that she was covering our meals tonight as the president of Viv’s fan club.
Of course, we could only go for so long though before something had to go wrong when our squad was around.
I hadn’t even been paying attention to the Aussies who were messing around next to the table that Viv and I were still sitting at as we both quietly talked to each other. I knew that the two of us would be making our leave soon as Viv was obviously worn out from the day.
I moved to slide out of my seat, but that proved to be the wrong thing to do because as soon as I had turned so that I could maneuver my way to my feet, Kyra had taken off to get away from Caitlin who was trying to chase her. Which meant that both of them collided with my recently injured knee.
I gasped as I tried to hold back the tears while I turned back in my seat to keep it from being ran into again. I was very away of how all of the attention had been turned to me.
The aching pain that I had been able to ignore all night was back and it was ten times worse now. It was so bad that I couldn’t even process the apologies coming from Kyra and Caitlin. Viv was quick to move around the table so that she could be on the side I was trying to get out from as she waited for the pain to subside.
“Did they give you anything for the pain?” Viv asked.
I shook my head before I fished out the prescription from my jacket pocket.
“I have a prescription, but I’ll have to get it from the pharmacy tomorrow.”
Viv took the prescription from me. I was also a bit surprised to find that she had shooed the others away so that we were in the room by ourselves.
“Why would they give you a prescription if you just hyperextended your knee?”
I sighed at the question. I really didn’t want to do this here. I would do it at home, but not here where anyone could hear us.
“(Y/N), they wouldn’t give this to you if you hyperextended your knee. Especially not a prescription for this much,” Viv pointed out. I knew that she had figured it out. Viv looked up at me as I felt my shoulder slump forward. I was already over this injury, and I had only had it for about five hours. “Why would they write you a prescription?”
“Not here, Viv.”
“Yes, here.”
“No. I’m not doing this here,” I said. Viv scoffed as she looked away from me. “We can talk about it as soon as we get home where it’ll be a private talk, but I’m not going to do this in public.”
Viv huffed as she stayed crouched in front of me for a moment before helping me up and situated with my crutches. Our walk outside was a silent one until we actually reached outside. Once we were outside, I found myself saying goodbye to our teammates and assuring both Kyra and Caitlin that I would be fine.
Viv stayed by my side as we made our way to the car. She even helped me get into the car. Something that we had mastered when she tore ACL, but it was a little awkward now. Both of us were used to doing the other’s role.
Viv stayed silent the whole ride back to our apartment. This morning’s playlist to get us both excited about the match we had today was the only thing keeping us from complete silence inside the car.
Even when we got home, Viv stayed quiet. She had gotten both of our bags out without a sound and followed me into the building. Her watching me struggle with the door for a moment before she held it open all the way so that I could get in without having to worry if the door was going to close on me or not. She stayed behind me as we made our way into the building.
I wasn’t sure if she refused to move in front of me just so she wouldn’t have to face me or if it was just because she was afraid that I’d fall and she thought she had a better chance at catching me if she was behind me.
Our trip from the elevator to our apartment took longer than normal as I was getting used to the crutches and couldn’t move as fast as Viv had eventually been able to. But once we were inside of our apartment, I moved to sit on the couch. I was fully prepared to sleep on the couch as well if she was mad enough at me. After all she was the one that would be going to a national camp tomorrow, so she’d need a better rest than me.
“I was going to tell you,” I assured her as she took a seat on the couch once our bags were put up. “I promise I was.”
“And did you plan on telling me before or after I left for camp?”
“I’m not a complete asshole, Viv. I was going to tell you as soon as we got home. But I knew what tonight meant for you. Three hundred and eleven days and you finally got back on the field. You deserved to celebrate with your friends. I wasn’t just going to let you skip that to baby me when I’m fine.”
“You tore your ACL! I don’t think you get what that’s like! Take it from some‒”
“I know! I know,” I cut her off. I couldn’t stop the tears that were threatening to fall as it was all finally catching up to me. “I’ll be out for at least six months, but it will more than likely be closer to nine before I can get on the field again. I’ll probably miss the Olympics because if it takes me nine months to come back then there’s no way I’ll be in form to go to the Olympics. And I’ll probably have more bad days than good ones.”
“When are you having surgery?”
“I don’t know, Viv. It just happened tonight. I’ll probably go talk to the team medics and a doctor tomorrow to figure out a plan.”
“I’ll call Jonker and let him know that I won’t be at camp.”
“No. No!” I moved forward to snatch her phone away from her. Viv tried to reach for it, but I moved back as far as I could. “You’re not doing that! You’re going to camp. I’m not letting you ruin everything you’ve worked for because of me.”
“You were there for me! Why can’t I be there for you?”
“I’m not saying that you can’t be. But you’re not putting your own career on hold because I have to have a surgery.”
“Then what about while I’m gone? It a lot harder to take care of yourself when you’re on crutches than you think.”
I sighed as I pinched the bridge of my nose. We were getting nowhere with this.
“Beth and Leah and Laura are all still going to be here. None of them were called up,” I pointed out. I hadn’t really thought about asking any of them if they’d be okay to help me out. “I can always ask them to help me. I’m sure that Tobin or Christen wouldn’t mind flying over to help me out for a couple of days.”
“I want to be able to take care of you like you took care of me,” Viv admitted as she moved closer to me. I sighed as I threaded a hand in her hair. “It’s scary and I would have never gotten through my own injury without you. I want us to be able to play together again and that means that you’ve got to get through this, but it’s hard and so emotionally draining.”
“And you are the one that’s going to get me through it,” I said. Viv perked up a little at that. “But I’m not going to let you sacrifice your own career because of mine. Especially not when you just got yours back. So, you’re going to camp.”
“But what about your surgery?”
I sighed as I moved my hand to play with the baby hairs at the nape of her neck. It knew that Viv always calmed down when I did that.
“I’ll wait to schedule it until you’re back from camp. And I’ll make sure that it won’t clash with the Manchester City game,” I assured Viv. Viv sighed before nodding in agreement. “Besides, between the girls who weren’t called up and our medical team, I’ll be well taken care of while you’re gone. And I’ll be sure to talk to you every day.”
“And if it ever feels like you’re drowning, you’ll tell me so that I can be there to pull you up like you did for me, right?”
“Right.”
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myboipracticallyimagines · 19 days ago
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Scarlet - Five Hargreeves x Reader
Prompt: You were a Sparrow dragging into a new timeline with your singular surviving sibling and a family who claimed he was theirs. In this new world, your powers of youth were ripped away, forcing you to age in five years what should have been twenty. Though you were the same age as the rest of the Sparrows, you were now perpetually in the aging body of a twenty-year-old. Unlike the rest of the Hargreeves, you needed to get back.
So did Five.
(A/N: Spoilers for Season 4 if any of y'all care. I wouldn't. Hopefully this will make the ending a tiny shred better for you guys.)
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It had been five years in this timeline. This broken, hellscape of a timeline in which Ben was all that was left of your family and your powers didn’t exist. Your power of youth did nothing here but make you perpetually younger than the rest of the Hargreeves. They wouldn't let you forget it, either. Though you were the same age as them, down to the minute, they seemed to regard you as their innocent, no-blood-on-your-hands, little sister that they were stuck looking out for. Save, Five, of course, who apparently was older than each of you but stuck in a younger version of himself. You would've been thrown off by the coincidence if everything about your world wasn't already fucked. The worst part, by far, was that you couldn’t even buy a fucking drink in this apocalypse.
Luther was the main, if not only, force keeping the family together - you and Ben included. Even though you apparently didn’t exist in his timeline, he tried his best to include you in the family functions. Even though you would've rather drowned yourself in your sorrows, you were grateful for him. Sometimes when he looked at you, you could see a hint of his own grief in them. It should've been Sloane who made it to this world with him, not you. Nothing tied you to this family except for Ben.
Not that he was much help. By year one he had built a Ponzi scheme empire and by year two he was in a low security federal prison. You couldn't help but think that he was better off there sometimes. He at least had a fresh start. He wasn't forced to assimilate to a different version of the family whose bodies were still fresh in your own timeline. He didn't have to push down his grief to save face, nor did he have to forge his own 'fresh start' in an utterly unfulfilling career.
Everyone else had their own vices in this timeline - bubble wrap, a bar, a family. They all seemed to assimilate fine to mundane life. Diego and Lila were seemingly never happier. They welcomed three children into this world in five years. Lila even had her birth family here. You were probably most jealous of her. Or maybe Allison, whose husband and daughter were both waiting for her as soon as she crossed over. You had never been lucky enough to love someone like that.
Or be loved like that.
Of course, none of the Hargreeves knew the full extent of what this world was doing to you. None of them felt the weight of time pulling them as you did. None of them felt themselves age in five years what should’ve been twenty. You needed to find a way back. Quickly.
Thus entered the Keepers. They weren’t hard to find by any means. You were introduced to them via flyer on your apartment building’s bulletin board. For a secret society, they had a fuckton of marketing. In your reality, you would’ve easily spilled the information to your sisters. In this one, you kept that shit to yourself.
Five began attending a month after you did.
You could tell by looking at him that he didn’t believe a word of what Jean and Gene were saying. It annoyed you at first - he’d been stuck in the future for 40 years, but a cleanse was where he drew the line? It didn’t take a genius to realize that the cleanse was just a fancy remarketing of an apocalypse, of which he had now allegedly survived four of.
While Five hovered near you for the duration of the meeting, he didn't speak to you until you were out of the building. "Need a ride?" "I only live a few blocks away," you shrugged. "And it's dark now. Can I give you a ride?" You rolled your eyes. "Sure. Thanks."
After opening and closing your door for you, Five got into the driver seat, though he made no effort to start the engine. He exhaled deeply. “It won’t work.” “What won’t work?” “The cleanse. It has every workings of an apocalypse. It’s not a magical reset button on the timeline. At least not for humanity.” “And how are you so sure of that?” “I’d been running from apocalypses for forty years before I met you. The people who died stayed dead. You can only watch the ones you love die so many times before you get a little cynical.” He turned towards you, eyes set on yours. “These timelines, as fleeting as they may be, are the only way for my family to be alive.” “No chance this one is just a magic reset button?” He pulled his lips into a tight smile. “Not a fucking chance.”
~~~
New Grumpson was perfect. It was the town out of a Hallmark Christmas movie, down to the hot chocolate stall and ice-skating rink. You would've started a new life there if everyone didn't immediately start shooting at you.
Every single one of you would have died if you hadn't just gotten your powers back. They were stronger here. You no longer had to touch your assailant to steal their youth. Instead, you could draw in youth from a crowd, watching their skin wrinkle and bones brittle from yards away. "What the fuck was that!" Diego shouted as the men before you fell to their knees, taking shaky last breaths as their lungs shriveled within their aging chests. "That's youth, baby!" you shouted back, spryer than you'd been in years. "Watch out!" Lila yells. In a split second you see the spray of bullets heading towards you - far too quickly to avoid. Just before they hit you, Five grabbed onto your shoulder and blinked
You had never felt his power before, and the sensation ripped the air out of your lungs. "Calm down, calm down," he spoke calmly, hands resting on your back as you doubled over. “Holy shit,” you whimpered, the rest of your body still vibrating from the trip. “What the fuck, Five?” “You’re welcome. Your cute little aging shit would’ve done nothing against a hundred bullet holes, sweetheart.”
With a deep breath, you steadied yourself and finally took a moment to look at your surroundings. While at first it just appeared to be a subway station, it was eerily dilapidated, and all the normal writing had been replaced by strange ciphers. “What is this place?” “This is my new power. Every time I blink, I land here. The trains go to the exact moment and place in time I blinked from in a different timeline. I’ve explored three so far. When I walked out of this station, minutes had passed - not the days I’d been away.” “What- Why-,” you stuttered through your question, your mind latching onto a million ideas as you replayed his words. “Why didn’t you tell us?” “Why would I?” “Because my family could be in one! There could be one where the world isn’t about to be fucking ripped apart! There could be one where I could be fucking happy!” “Not the ones I’ve seen. This place is a paradise compared to what I’ve walked through.”
A low squealing of metal alerted you to a train on approach. “Show me.” “Show you?” “Please, Five. I need to see it. I will never be content here if I knew something better could be waiting.” He let out a low groan. “Fine. One timeline. And then we’re going back, and I will hear no more of this station.” You nodded fiercely. “Not a word.”
He took you to the first new timeline he came across. He promised to play fair and avoid the few that he'd already seen. Four stops down and you were at your destination - a train station almost identical to the one you'd boarded. Five took note of the few differentials - different symbols on the signs, a murky looking puddle, and so on.
"Done journaling?" you finally asked as he placed his notebook back in his pocket. A look of distaste crossed his lips. "This journaling is what is going to keep you alive. In our timeline at least. Who's to say in this one." "Lovely," you smiled back. "Just stay behind me."
You obliged, following him up the stairs of the station and into the sunlight of the wide open. The heat was the first thing that hit you - it was brutal. Not only was your skin burning, but so were your lungs. It felt like stepping into a blazing fire. "What is this place?" you coughed. When no response immediately came, you turned to Five. He seemed transfixed, eyes shifting around quickly to try and take in as much information as he could. "Five, are you okay?" "This is my apocalypse," he breathed. "This is where I was stuck for forty years." "Fuck." Your voice barely carried above the wind. "Let's get out of here."
Five was still frozen in place when the rain of bullets began. You hit the ground, pushing yourself behind what used to be a car. "Who's shooting at us?" you screamed at Five, who had dropped just after you did. "I am!" he yelled back. He repositioned himself to kneel beside you. The moment his hand hit yours, you were back in the station.
"I am so sorry," you choked out the moment your lungs refilled with air. "I didn't even consider we could end up there." "I knew the risk. I just didn't think we'd end up there so soon." He didn't look at you when he spoke. "I am sorry, Five. I shouldn't have made you show me." "But you did," he sighed. "Let's just get home and forget this ever happened.
You didn't speak to him as you waited for the next train, or as you boarded the car, nor as you stopped at three stations. You did, however, let out a quick gasp when you passed station four at full speed and traveled onto the next. "Did that happen last time?" Five grit his teeth. "It did not." Apprehensively, you spoke again. "We can just get off at the next one and go northbound instead."
It was a great idea, in theory. In reality, the track had shifted, leading you to an entirely new station that held an extremist military regime topside. You got out of that one pretty quickly. Five studied the map some more and went seven stops southbound, leading you directly into the mouth of an active volcano. You tried eleven more south, six more north, two more south, and nineteen more north before you had to rest. "We've been down here for three days," Five finally spoke as the two of you sat around a small fire he had made. "It's been a few minutes now back home. My whole family could be dead." "They're not dead, Five. They have their powers back. They're strong." He rolled his eyes. "You were seconds from death when I brought you here." "And I'm still alive. They have each other, too, Five. When we get back, they'll have every soldier wiped out." "I think you are severely underestimating how much those people wanted to kill us." "And you are severely underestimating your siblings' power. They can handle themselves until you get back." Five sighed. "We'll see."
That conversation had taken place approximately six years, five months, and two days ago.
You had eaten more subway rats in that time than anyone should have to see in their entire lives. The two of you had been shot at, stabbed, burnt, and bitten enough for several lifetimes over, and were somehow still alive. On the bright side, it had gotten much easier to set up camp in the station. The process was almost flawless, with Five tending to a fire and updating his journal as you captured your dinner. Dinner was almost always rats. Some days you got really lucky and found a stray bird. Other days there was no life at all. Today was just average, with you scavenging two healthy sized rats for Five to cook over the fire. "Tonight, I present to you a lovely appetizer of subway rat, following by a delicious main of rat from a subway," you said, pulling the two rodents from behind your back. "Ah, a true delicacy," he smiled up at you. You smiled back, "I aim to please."
You sank to the ground beside him, completely spent from days of running from apocalypse to apocalypse. Five took care of the actually gross part of the meal preparation, and today you watched him work in silence. When he finally leaned back beside you, you spoke. "I'm tired, Five. I don't know how much longer I have in me." "I know," he said softly. Neither of you spoke for a long time. Crackles and sparks from the fire were the only noises that greeted you tonight. No trains ran by either direction, solidifying you were staying just where you were tonight. "Do you remember the greenhouse we found a few weeks ago?" You smiled. "How could I forget? Those strawberries were the highlight of my year." Five let out a small laugh before tightening his lips. "What if we went back there? Just to regroup and regain some strength?" Everything in you wanted nothing more than to go back there - to live whatever time you had left in the warm sun and safety that the timeline had offered. "We can't." "Why not?" "Because I won't be able to leave, Five. I am exhausted to the very core my being, but I would never forgive myself if we gave up. I'm the reason you're here. I can't be the reason you stay here." "Don't say that," Five said softly. "You are not the reason we got stuck. And we aren't giving up. We're just taking a pause." "Fine," you finally give in. "But I'm following you up there. You have to be the one to pull us back to reality." "Kicking and screaming," he smiled.
Train station eighteen north brought you up to the most beautiful place you had ever seen with your own eyes. The grass was green and lush and spread as far as the eye could see. Below your feet, the ground was cool and sturdy, and before you, the path led to a quaint cottage with an attached greenhouse. The sun hit it at all hours of the day and the gardens were overgrown with berries. Wildlife was still abundant here, the deer and rabbits unafraid of the two intruders on their land. It was a paradise.
"Home sweet home," you smiled, opening the door to the most homely abandoned house you'd ever encountered. Technology was different in every timeline, but this one seemed to be similar to a few decades ago in yours. There was a working shower, sinks, and refrigerator, but you also had lamps for light and a wood stove for warmth. Though you loved your family with all your heart, the house you had grown up in had never been a home. This was a home. And it was somehow yours. You were still taking it in when Five rushed past you. "I call first shower." "No fair!" you shouted back, but he was already in the bathroom with the door locked behind him.
While Five showered, you picked your first of many crates of strawberries. They were perfectly ripened and easily the best thing you'd tasted in six and a half years. With shaky hands, you sat down at the table and brought the fruit to your lips. "Thank you," you whispered, unable to stop the flow of tears running from the corner of your eyes unto your collarbones. They were unrelenting and unstoppable once they began. It had been eleven years since you felt this level of peace. And you feared you would never feel it again. Even if you made it back, you knew death was only a step behind you, hot on your heels.
"Alright, I'm-" Five said before crossing the threshold into the living room. With a shaky hand, you wiped your eyes, but Five had already seen your tears. "What's wrong?" "It's nothing," you pushed away, trying to calm your still shaky breaths. "No, it's not. I've known you for twelve years and I have never seen you cry." "I said it was nothing, Five," you said sharply, storming into the greenhouse. He caught up quickly, pulling you swiftly back into his arms. He held you closely, wrapping one arm around your waist and using the other to grab the back of your neck, holding you in place. You could've gotten away easily if you wanted to. But you didn't want to. Your snap was immediate, and this time the tears weren't silent. They were accompanied by sobs that raked through your body and crawled forcefully from your lips. They were uncontainable, uncontrollable, and unrelenting. When your legs became weak, Five lowered to the floor with you, still holding you tightly to his chest. It could've been hours, days, or merely seconds before you were finally able to calm yourself down. Your body had collapsed against Five and you couldn't bring yourself to pull away. You didn't apologize for your breakdown, nor did you make any effort to pull yourself away from him. When you finally mustered the strength to look at him, he was staring down at you.
"What's wrong?" he asked once more. You shake your head slightly, trying to prevent another wave of tears. "It's just so nice here." "It is. Why did that make you cry?" he asked, wiping your matted hair from your face. It took you a moment to find your voice again, your throat still trying to close in on itself. "I haven't felt this peaceful in eleven years. Maybe even then. I don't know if I'll ever experience it again." Five didn't immediately speak, so the words kept coming. "I know I shouldn't feel happy that I'm here, but I do. The world is crashing on almost every single person I have left and I'm here, eating fucking strawberries." "You're stuck here eating strawberries," Five corrected. "You did not choose to abandon the rest of the world; you were forced to. There is no reason you can't find a glimmer of comfort in your own apocalypse." His usual temper was gone, replaced with a softness you'd never seen from him before.
You wanted to kiss him.
You wanted to reach up and pull his lips to yours and disappear into him completely. To hold onto him as the world fell apart around you. To become his.
He kissed you first.
He moved slowly at first, apprehension forcing him to pull his punches. His hands didn't wander as he drank you in, as if he were afraid that one rash movement would snap you back to reality. You pushed further into him, wrapping your arms around him, digging your nails into his scarred skin. That spurred him on. One hand tangling itself into your hair while the other cupped your face against his. Each movement, each scratch and pull and moan pulled him further in, until he was all you could see or feel or think. He was yours. And you were his.
Months passed in domestic tranquility. By day you ate strawberries and game, and by night you drank in each other. The world fell around you, but you remained safe in the haven of your own creation. While this world took care of you, you took care of it. Each morning you turned your attention to the cottage, repairing every last item in disarray. You mended clothing and quilts while Five fixed pipes and floorboards. Not a soul interrupted you during your stay. It seemed you might have been the only souls left - the sole inhabitants of an apocalyptic after. You were the first breath of life after it was wiped from existence.
And from your two lives, came another.
You had suspected you were pregnant for weeks, but your second missed period finally fully convinced you. In a few months, you were going to bring a baby into this world. A perfect child born into an apocalypse. The future, which had finally been palatable, now terrified you. Would this universe collapse again? Did it even matter? Your child would know nothing but the two of you. They would have no friends, no life or love outside of you and Five. Even if you found a way home, how could you bring them into an apocalypse on the verge of collapse?
Five broke you out of your trance. He was flushed and breathing heavily - he had run back from the train station. "I have to tell you something," he said quickly. "So do I." "You go first," you said in sync. You rolled your eyes, though a smile pulled at your lips. He smiled too, before closing the distance between you and pulling you into a deep kiss. He paused as he pulled away. "You go first," he whispered. He remained a breath away from you, holding you tight to him. "I'm pregnant, Five." He drew a sharp breath. "You're sure?" You nodded. "It's been two months. I think I've known for a while now but didn't want it to be true. I've condemned them to death even before their birth." "They won't die here," Five spoke calmly, though his eyes glistened with the ghost of a tear. "I found a cipher. I know the way out."
You refused to believe him until he showed you. Within his hands, Five held the guide to a million universes, with yours at the center. The one which held the rest of your family sat only seven stops away.
"They've been so close all this time," you said as your throat threatened to close in on itself. "They were within our reach all this time." "This knowledge doesn't affect our past. We could've looked for them for years and still not found them. Either of us could've died in the next apocalypse we found. We did what we could to survive this." You shook your head. "We weren't surviving, Five. We were thriving. We found the cushiest apocalypse we could and started playing house." "Is that what this is to you? Playing house?" His tone hardened but his voice didn't rise against you. "What else is it, then?" "I think you know." Your heart stopped beating within your chest the moment the worlds left his mouth. "I don't." "Yes, you do." "Say it then." You refused to pull the words out of him. The three words that you had kept deep within you for the past two years.
"I love you."
Your world stopped. The only things left in existence were you, Five, and the flutter within your stomach.
"I love you, too."
A minute passed. Then two.
"I can't bring our baby back there, Five."
Another minute.
"I know."
The two of you stood in the greenhouse for ages, just staring at the other. No more words were shared. They didn't need to be. Both of you knew what you were asking of the other.
“I’ll age here,” Five spoke softly. “So will I.” You drew in a deep breath. “I age the same as you do without a fight. There’s nothing to keep me young here.” “Maybe that’s a good thing. We can grow old together without the threat of another apocalypse. Raise our child in a world that isn't always on the edge of extinction.” “What about your family?” you ask. "They've mourned me once before. They'll survive a second time." "You'd give them up to stay here. With me?" "For you, my love, I would give up the universe."
Seven months later, you brought your daughter into the world, kicking and screaming. She was as stubborn as her father and caused you to labor for 27 hours before she finally made her debut. Five didn't breathe until she let out her first cry, followed immediately by his. He pushed her onto your chest, holding both of you against his. His tears mixed into yours as he showered you in kisses and praises.
You named her Scarlet, after the shade of the perfect strawberries that had pulled you into this timeline. As much as you could possibly love her, Five loved her more. He hated to be away from her in the hours he needed to hunt or scavenge. He found any way to cut his outings short, pulling her into his arms as soon as he returned. When she was six months old, you sewed him a wrap to carry her with him. She was a far better hunting partner than you were. For however many hours the two were out, both returned happy.
Upon return from metal scavenging one morning when Scarlet was almost one, she returned with a folded-up piece of cloth within her tiny first. "What do you have there, baby girl?" you asked, pulling her from her father's grasp into yours. You unfolded the cloth to find a silver ring. Your fingers traced the intricate patterns adorning the jewelry. "Where did you get this?" you turned to Five, who was knelt before you. "Scarlet and I made it for you." He took the ring back and placed it gingerly onto your left ring finger. "Will you marry me?" "Yes," you exclaimed tenderly, pulling Five up to kiss you. The two of you shared tears of happiness, only interrupted by Scarlet's occasional coo.
Scarlet was four when you stood at the top of the train station, bundled up tightly in the winter air. "Are you sure about this?" Five asked. "As I'll ever be," you said, holding Scarlet tightly at your side. With one hand around you and the other around his daughter, Five led you into the station.
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goth-mami-writer · 8 months ago
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🩶As Close As Strangers🩶
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{POV: When drunk Leon showed up at your door that night, the last thing you wanted to do was catch up with your old partner. There was just too much you hadn't told him.}
♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡
《 Rain was falling against your roof softly that night, lulling the sound of late traffic and other nighttime noises outside your suburban home. But it startled you when a loud, jarring knock came to the door suddenly.
It thudded with an urgency, and you were on alert now with the thought of who could be knocking this late. In the rain, too. You stood up, using your used-to-be police training to creep through your living room to see out onto your stoop.
Your eyes widened seeing no one at first, but there was a shadow that slowly came into the light, and your heart thundered when you recognized the face. You hurried to the door, unsure even with a million guesses as to how he even found your address or remembered you at all.
“Leon?!” You said opening the door in a swing, wrapping yourself tighter in your silk night robe to keep the chill of the rain away.
He stumbled on his feet, seeming like he was reaching for a hug but he stopped, as if he was unsure how to proceed in reintroducing himself. Suddenly it all became clear when he started to slur his speech in a ramble of words,
“I ugh- I was in the…the ugh- ” His hands moved up to try and talk without words, but you nodded in understanding,
“You're drunk.” You said finitely, ready to tell him that he needed to find a way home but he stumbled again, however this time his stance gave out completely as he dropped on your doorstep in a fall.
You knelt down, trying to save him from hurting himself then mentioned in a gasp upon feeling the wetness of rain soaked in his clothes,
“Did you walk here?”
You knew it didn't matter. He was drenched, shivering, probably on the verge of a fever from the cold, and he was clearly too plastered to get himself home. So, you helped him inside, pulling on him gently and supporting his weight to rest him on the sofa for now while you figured this out.
You hadn't seen Leon in years. He looked exactly the same. As if time just hadn't caught up to him yet. You wished you could say the same. The new recruit you were when you knew him was long gone now. You'd changed so much. You wondered if maybe he'd just have to meet you all over again. You were partners at one pretty little point in time, always together and growing together to protect the city.
Now…you felt as close as strangers.
But there was something else. Something so dire that you never got to say to him. Your world depended on it, actually. Leon Kennedy was someone you hoped to never see again now that you'd stayed silent for this long with such a gravelly secret.
You sat him on the couch, watching as clearly his head was swimming from alcohol. He smelled flammable, so you were surprised he wasn't ready to lose the liquor on your living room floor, but he was quiet. And still. You reached forward, trying to convince him to shed his wet jacket to get comfortable, telling him to just lie down and be warm for a while. Quietly, he fell asleep, and you knew that might be for the best. You didn’t want to catch up like old friends. There was too much he didn't know.
Couldn't know.
After a few minutes, your gaze on his nostalgia was broken when he began to stir away from sleep. You never thought you'd see him again but he looked at you tiredly now trying to keep conversation.
“How've you been? Haven't seen you since I moved up to federal. I lost my cell at the bar - I figured I'd see if you were home.” He said with a little more sobriety.
Your blood went cold when you knew you had to lie and you played the only card you had at this moment, which was being as vague as possible.
“I've been fine. Just working…some here then some there. Just busy.”
He nodded but then groaned as he sat up straight. Letting the moonlight in the room illuminate his face. Your expression turned soft, and you watched as winced from a headache - somehow beautifully. You stood up, trying not to be seen awestruck by the eyes that still halted you to this day.
You poured tea that was still warm from the kitchen kettle and brought it over in a mug as it steamed. You promised it would help his headache, and he thanked you in a mutter as he drank.
“How uhm-” You said stuttering now as you sat across from him, becoming more interested in talking after all,
“How've you been?”
Leon swallowed his gulp laboredly, that probably being the only hydration he'd had in hours, and he cleared his throat softly,
“I've been alright. They take me everywhere now that I'm an agent. I'm wondering when they'll let me off the leash for a while.”
You smiled, chuckling to remember how hardcore of a workaholic he was. Even before being promoted to agent, he was always everywhere for the city. Under the governor's orders or the mayor's. He did work like a dog.
You balled up in the armchair where you sat and heard as he spoke further with a growing smile,
“Yanno, I actually caught up with our old chief the other day. I told him that…you were still one of the best partners I ever had. He said you….went on leave for a while? After our last mission, I ugh- didn't expect that.”
Oh God, you thought with a shiver in your spine.
There was no way to explain that little leave of yours without telling the truth. And all of it. You struggled to find an explanation. Another lie. You only nodded, struggling to merely confirm that you did in fact leave the force for a while.
But, suddenly, there was a creak on your stairs where a tiny voice called out in the dark,
“Mommy?”
You both spun towards the stairs where the small voice came from and Leon froze seeing a boy, no older than five, sleepily rubbing his eyes in his pajamas. He looked back to you, silencing himself from even breathing as you interacted with what to be….your small son.
You put on your kind, motherly smile to ask if he'd had a nightmare, to which he nodded so sweetly. You assured him that you'd be up to turn on his nightlight in just a moment and heard him tiptoe back up the stairs with his tiny footsteps thudding.
He didn't see Leon. That was a relief. But Leon also didn't see him, not in this dark.
At least not his face.
However, once there was quiet again, you knew exactly how this night would go. Leon was too quick, he wasn't stupid. He'd piece it together like the trusted detective he was. And there'd be only one person to blame.
“I-” He stammered, getting the first hint that you were lying about something,
“I didn't know you had a kid..either.”
You stayed quiet. Maybe you wouldn't have to open your mouth at all. He could see you weren't wearing a wedding ring. Meaning this boy's father wasn't asleep upstairs or…away on a business trip.
You both were inches away from the truth now, and you saw as the pieces in his mind soon fell into place.
He thought of the last mission you were on together. Not the work of it all. Not the report, and not the recognition you earned for it. It was the night after.
That night.
"Fuck that job", he thought. All he could remember was that night.
Both of you had just finished your report in DC, shook hands with the governor and….tried to fly home. But there was a storm - the flight was canceled. And the only hotel with vacancy within city limits had only one room for the both of you. It didn't matter if there were double beds. Neither of you slept a wink.
"We….didn't even want to," he remembered.
"We just wanted each other. Over and over again."
But what month was it. Was it May? April - No. It was summer.
It was July.
“He's not yours, Leon. Christ!” You said in a quiet snap, knowing the face he made when his mind tried to unravel a timeline and do the math.
It was one last attempt at a good lie to make this all normal again.
Leon kept quiet. That face he made- The one that solved cases stayed firm in the thought that he needed to determine whether or not was being lied to. And had been for years now.
He reached to the end table at his side, but he kept his gaze with yours. He told you without words that you had one last chance for honesty before he looked at the photo being tenderly kept in a frame right here in the family room. He didn't need to guess if it was a picture of your son.
He knew.
His eyes moved down, stone cold sober now, and you tried to stop him from using that same ray of moonlight to see how big of goddamn liar you really were. He'd see the resemblance. There wouldn't be a need for him to do any math after that.
“...L- Leon, d-”
“Just fucking stop.” He said cutting you off with the first touch of rage in his tone now that he saw exactly what he'd been left in the dark about.
It was everything.
He began to unsnap this photo away from its picture frame, wanting and needing to hold it in his hands. His jaw tightened and his throat burned. He thought you were a better liar. Or maybe just a better person.
Sometimes, when he was alone, all he thought of was you…in that room with him in DC. Was this why? Because something wasn't right?
“Don't you dare tell me…that he isn't mine.”
He turned the picture of your small son towards you, practically holding the proof in his hands. He didn't need to remember the month you slept together. Or ask you how old your son was exactly.
He knew.
“-When he looks just like me.” 》
(Open to finishing this one ♡ more to come)
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ellatoone7 · 1 year ago
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Don't know if you've seen the Videos of Alexia at the airport getting followed by paps. Would you write a fic where reader is also playing on the national team and is together with Alexia. Maybe Reader is just as famous as Alexia. When Alexia gets swamed by paps (which by the way reader hates cameras) reader all but drags Alexia through the crowd. And after making sure Alexia is ok she gives the paps an ear full about being a bit nicer.
Respect (Alexia Putellas x reader)
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A/N: I can’t even begin to imagine what the girls must be feeling right now. The most horrible situation to be put in. Those girls are truly the biggest inspirations to everyone! 🫶
The situation was absolutely impossible. Alexia knew that, you knew that, your teammates knew hell the whole world knew that. You watch Alexia retype the statement over and over again, you can’t possibly fathom how she manages to fit the injustice of what’s happened in one A4 page.
Alexia has been silently seething since the call up, you didn’t think she could get angrier but you were proven wrong when Patri and Mapi’s name popped up.
You walk over to your exhausted girlfriend hoping to offer some comfort, “Baby, you need to get some sleep.” Your arms rest on her shoulders as you watch the fight leave Alexia’s body.
“I don’t know what to do.” Your girlfriend looked to you for an answer knowing that you wouldn’t have one either. Instead of telling her it will be okay, you try to offer as much support as you possibly could.
Your head was absolutely pounding with all the thoughts running through your head. The anger was always there, it never really left. Even hearing the name of that fucking federation sends you into a frenzy that you try to contain.
The fear was new, sure you had always known that the RFEF were an absolute piece of shit but you never thought it would get this far. You were nearly positive that it ended with Rubiales and Vilda going down but you know that was naive thinking.
After hours of deliberation, you and Alexia knew that there was no other choice but to go. Your career wasn’t something you were overly worried about knowing that you had made the most of it while you could but the thought of leaving the younger girls behind to suffer scared you more than anything the RFEF could ever do to you.
That’s how you find yourself walking through the airport, the arm wrapped around your waist tightens as Alexia spots the press hoping to god she would somehow be able to find the both of you invisible.
You stayed close to your girlfriend, you had never been a fan of the cameras even more so now when you’ve been forced into this situation.
Alexia stayed calm knowing that her getting angry would help no one, her main priority right now was getting you through the mob of people safely, it was the only thing she could control at the moment.
“Just breathe, Mi amor. Ignore them.” You hear Alexia whisper as she places a reassuring kiss to the crown of your head, wanting to just get it over with as she walks towards the media.
The minute they catch sight of the two of you, you’re swarmed. You tuck yourself impossibly close to the blonde, you try to calm yourself down at the amount of questions they throw your way.
Alexia keeps her eyes forward, occasionally glancing at you making sure the reporters keep their hands to themselves. You hear Alexia respond calmly to a few questions thrown her way but you can see that your girlfriend is quickly getting overwhelmed.
No one else would be able to tell with the mask she’s perfected over the years but you can see the slight panic in her eyes as they dart around the place.
You know that her arm that’s wrapped around your waist is as comforting for her as it is for you, you discreetly place your own hand over hers letting her know you were okay.
She glances down at you nearly tripping over a stray lead of a camera, she immediately apologises and your heart aches at how good your girlfriend is even in this horrific situation.
As your gate finally comes into sight, you hear her answer to one particular question, “How are you feeling?”
“Well bad.” Your heart shatters at her defeated tone, you know this has been slowly eating away at her. There is only so much pretending one person can do and you know she’s quickly reaching her limit.
They give you room to breathe once you have finally reached your gate, she waits for you to go first but you insist that she does as she has her details ready on her phone.
She shoot’s you a grateful yet slightly worried smile, not feeling secure with leaving you behind even if it’s for less than a minute. You kiss her cheek letting her know that you’d be fine and also to thank her for unnecessarily taking the brunt of the press.
You watch her walk through the gate and once she’s out of sight you turn to cameras, the rage that you had tried to put aside for your teammates' sakes flamed up at the sight of your distressed girlfriend.
The press catches on to the fact that you haven’t followed the older girl and immediately fires questions at you. You ignore every single one of them wanting to make sure they understand every single word you are about to say.
“We are in an impossible situation, one you couldn’t even imagine. The last thing we need is you people sticking your cameras into our faces when you don’t know the half of it. I will not stand here and watch as you create more false accusations to add fuel to the already massive fire. Alexia is an absolute saint for putting up with all this shit give her some room to fucking breathe and have some respect for this horrific situation we have been put in.”
You don’t think you have ever spoken to a camera as much as you just have, you knew there could be some repercussions but you find yourself not caring as the tension eases just a little bit.
The press have gone dead silent, no doubt in shock as they witness your normally shy and composed persona switch before their eyes.
With one last deadly glare you make your own way through the gate, desperate to get away from their prying eyes but also desperate to feel your girlfriend's touch.
“What took you so long? I was getting worried.” You felt slightly guilty seeing the concern on the already stressed girl's face. You cup her face soothingly as you press a soft kiss to her lips. She visibly relaxes as her hands find your hips, “Are you okay?” You nearly cry at the question, how can she ask you that when she has the weight of the national team on her shoulders.
“I am now that you are here.” She cracks the first genuine smile of the day, holding you close to her as she relaxes knowing no one is watching.
“We are going to get through this, Alé. I promise you.” You reassure as you tuck your face into her neck, she rubs a hand down your back, “I’m not going to stop fighting.” You sigh knowing that she would destroy herself if it meant everyone else would be okay, the love you feel for the brave, selfless woman overpowers every other feeling.
With one more firm kiss you make her another promise, “And I’ll be with you every step of the way.”
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anonymous-dentist · 9 months ago
Text
Or: In a world where everybody has a superpower, Roier doesn't seem to have one
For day five of @smallchaoscryptid's Spiderbit Week- Superheroes/Blood
-
Cellbit's dreams are always dark. They start with him in his childhood bedroom, and then they move him down to the kitchen his parents died in, and then they end with him under the bridge. The sounds are muffled, but he can still understand what's being said, and it's always: "It's your fault."
Because it is.
He's had the same dreams since the night his parents died.
Every.
Goddamn.
Night.
But, well. He deserves it. The darkness surrounding the edges of his dream blurs out the unimportant details, like the face of the little girl who was sitting at the kitchen table when Cellbit's parents died, or the view outside of his bedroom window.
But the darkness hides something else- and this is a recent development, and he really doesn't understand it. Because, just out of view, is a figure in all black with eyes that glow white and claws that tear through Cellbit's dreams like they're paper.
He doesn't know who, or what, this thing is, but he does know a few things about it:
The creature destroys Cellbit's nightmares, sending his subconscious tumbling into a much happier dream- one that he can never remember when he wakes up
The creature tries to talk to him every time, but the fangs in its mouth are so large that it just can't
The creature seems to grow taller and stronger with every nightmare it destroys.
The creature is scared of Cellbit's husband
Now, yeah, sure, the creature can't talk, but Cellbit doesn't need to hear someone speak to know what they're afraid of. That's his superpower: fear. He can look at someone and hear what they're scared of, and he can make them scared, and it's horrible and he's a monster and he deserves to-
Cellbit gasps his way into full consciousness. He stares at the ceiling, chest heaving, brain loud and annoying and and and and-
"Gatinho?" Roier murmurs, curled up by Cellbit's side with his head pillowed on Cellbit's chest. He wraps an arm around Cellbit's middle and squirms closer, somehow, he's so clingy.
"Está bem," Cellbit breaths. "Just... just thinking."
"Well, don't," Roier grumbles. "Your brain is loud. Sleep, pendejo."
As if on command, Cellbit's eyelids droop. Roier always has this effect on him; he's just so comforting. He's a living, breathing weighted blanket, and Cellbit loves him so fucking much.
Soon enough, he's asleep again, and he's face-to-face with the creature again.
The creature tries to speak, but no noise comes out.
It flexes its claws as Dream Cellbit starts the walk downstairs to the kitchen.
The dream is shredded, and Cellbit finds himself face-to-face with-
-
Roier and Cellbit have been married for almost one whole entire wonderful year. He's known Roier for one and a half years, and he's been out of prison for two years.
Roier knows about the creature in Cellbit's dreams, even if Cellbit hasn't told him what his dreams actually are. Roier's been trying to come up with a name for it for months now, but Cellbit doesn't really know what to think of that considering the creature is literally invading his brain every night.
"It's kind of sweet, though, right?" Roier asks.
Cellbit wrinkles his nose and jabs his chopsticks down into his rice.
Dinner tonight is Chinese takeout because Roier's tired from work and Cellbit is tired from existing. It's good, but kind of bland. Since they changed ownership and ended up under the Federation of Heroes' official branding, the food has gone downhill. Yet another thing that Cucurucho has ruined, ugh.
"I mean, maybe?" Cellbit replies. "It's kind of freaky."
"I don't know, it kind of sounds cute."
Cellbit gives Roier a flat look; Roier just grins and steals some chicken from his plate.
"It's destroying my dreams," Cellbit says. "That doesn't sound 'cute' to me."
"Yeah, but doesn't it give you different dreams?" Roier asks. "I think it's trying to help."
"Yeah, or it's trying to kill me."
Roier's shoulders tighten. "Do you think so?"
It's always hard to pick up Roier's fears, but Cellbit can often just guess them even without using his powers. Like, he knows that Roier is just scared enough of bears to refuse to go camping anywhere without a cabin for him to stay him. He and Cellbit are both terrified of losing each other, and they're even more scared of losing their kids.
God, Cellbit is so stupid. He doesn't need to be worrying Roier with this, he already freaks out enough when Cellbit ends up caught in the middle of one of the Federation's hero fights due to his abysmally terrible luck.
His face falls. He places his chopsticks down and reaches across the table and takes Roier's hand in his.
"It'll be fine," he tells Roier. "If it tries to kill me, I'll just... wake up."
"If it tries to kill you, I'll kick its ass," Roier swears.
He squeezes Cellbit's hand once and offers a lackluster smile.
Cellbit's heart twists in his chest. Oh, Roier...
-
The night's dream starts as usual:
Cellbit opens his eyes to find himself in his childhood bedroom in his childhood body. There aren't any bloodstains on his clothes yet, though that'll change soon enough.
He tries looking out the window, but that isn't what he did that night, so anything beyond the window is covered by the darkness.
There's a growl, and then the creature forms in the shadows near Cellbit's bed. (There are always two beds in his room, but why?)
"What do you want?" Cellbit tries to ask, but that isn't what he did that night.
Instead, and in a squeaky childish voice, he groans and shouts, "This sucks! I can't figure it out!"
He's at his desk. In front of him are multiplication tables he's supposed to be doing for homework, and they're easy enough that Adult Cellbit could do them now, but that isn't what happened that night. So the problems look like random lines and squiggles, and Cellbit's chest hurts, and he can't breathe, and-
"I can't do this!" he shouts, jumping off of his chair and pulling his homework with him. "Mãe!"
He reaches his door, has his hand on the handle, and then... there's the creature by his side shredding the door into pieces with its claws.
Cellbit blinks, and he's an adult again, and he's in a different dream, and he turns to the side and he's face-to-face with-
-
Roier is one of the few people Cellbit has ever heard of that doesn't have a superpower. He seems happy enough without one, but... but Cellbit thinks that he's lying. He isn't angry that Roier is lying, though. No, he understands, because he himself lied about not having powers until they'd been dating for six months.
In the back of his mind, Cellbit has a few ideas of what Roier's secret superpower could be. The only one he says out loud is, "I know what your power is. You're super handsome!"
But, in order, it goes:
Extreme endurance (evidence: goes for long runs every morning and ends up back in bed sweating and tired by the time Cellbit wakes up)
Can always cook the perfect meal (evidence: he's just really good at cooking)
Comfort aura (evidence: Cellbit always feels happy and cozy and safe when Roier is around)
Super strength (evidence: he's really strong)
But, well. None of those quite work, mostly because the majority of them are just early excuses for thinking Roier was attractive back before they started dating.
Tonight as Cellbit brushes his teeth and gets ready for bed, he thinks up a new idea:
Vocal projection (evidence: he's loud as fuck when he's singing in the shower)
Because, yes, Roier is, indeed, in the shower, and he's singing very loudly. But, really, Cellbit wouldn't have him any other way. He's perfect.
"Hey, guapito," Cellbit says after rinsing his mouth out. "I need your help with something?"
Roier cuts his song off with an irritated groan. "Now? I was almost to the chorus!"
"Desculpe. But you're better at naming things than I am, and I need help coming up with something to call the creature in my dream diary."
"You have a dream diary?"
"I'm starting it tonight. I'm going to figure this thing out."
"That's cute!"
Cellbit can see Roier's silhouette shaking with silent laughter through the shower curtain. Wordlessly, he opens the curtain so he can take the shower head down and spray Roier with it.
"It's serious," Cellbit says, ignoring Roier's screeching protests. "I think it's messing with my head."
"Put that down- vete a la verga, fuck!"
Roier bats at Cellbit's hands until Cellbit lowers the shower head.
And then Roier yanks the shower head away from him and sprays him with it.
"Pendejo!" Cellbit shouts. (Not the best swear word, but it's all he could come up with on such short notice.)
He skitters away from the shower and looks, horrified, down at his soaking wet pajamas.
"Whoops," Roier plainly says. "Guess you'll just have to sleep naked tonight."
He grins, and Cellbit hates him. He wants to kiss him soooo badly!
So he does, and it's nice.
A few minutes later as they crawl into bed, Roier says, "Hey. I have a name for your monster."
Cellbit looks at him. "Yeah?"
"Call it Venom. It's, like, dissolving your dreams, right? Like poison?"
Brain poison, hmm.
Cellbit grabs his brand new dream journal off of his bedside table and opens it. Right on the first page is a long, detailed description of his dream. Right below it is a description of the creature as well as a really messy drawing.
'Venom', he writes.
...What a specific descriptoin. "Dissolving your dreams", not quite how Cellbit has been describing it.
He glances at Roier out of the corner of his eye.
Hm.
-
The first part of the dream goes normally.
And then Cellbit is downstairs at the kitchen table with his parents. There's also a girl there, but Cellbit hadn't looked at her face that night, so she doesn't have one now.
"I can't do it," Cellbit whines. He balls his hands into fists and fights the urge to smash his own face into the table.
"You can," his father insists. "You're a smart kid! Why don't we take a break."
He gets up from the table and goes to cut some watermelon.
Cellbit knows what's about to happen next. But he can't close his eyes, because his eyes were open that night.
"Let's try one more time, okay?" his mother asks.
He sniffles and nods.
He looks down at the problems. He can't understand him, he's so stupid. He's so stupid! Why can't he be like [her]?! She's good at math. She's even finished her homework.
His vision starts to blur. He can't see. He can't- he can't breathe oh fuck he can't breathe why can't he breathe what why can't he
A scream.
He looks up and watches his father finish plunging his watermelon-cutting knife into his own stomach.
"Pai!?" the girl screeches.
"I can't do it," Cellbit's mother whispers. "I'm a failure. I can't do it."
She wrestles Cellbit's pencil from his hand and raises it to her eye and-
Cellbit gasps as a clawed hand rips the table into pieces in front of him.
As the dream shifts and as his body turns back into his own, he's pulled by the creature- by Venom- into a loose hug. Its claws dig into his back, but they don't hurt.
He looks up, and he finds himself face-to-face with-
-
Roier was the first person that Cellbit let himself get attached to after he was released from prison.
He'd met Roier by pure chance, and it was love at first sight. He was just so... and he's still so...
"Does this dress make my ass look big?" Roier asks, posing in front of Cellbit in a way that most people would probably call sexy.
...perfect.
They'd met at their mutual friend, Maxo's, club. Roier wasn't on the pole that night, he was instead working the bar, and he and Cellbit hit it off immediately.
The next time Cellbit had been gone, Roier wasn't there, but his 'cousin' was. Melissa, according to Roier, owns half of the club.
And then, seven months later while rummaging through Roier's closet looking for a hoodie to steal, Cellbit had seen one of Melissa's dresses, and, well. Cellbit isn't stupid, okay? But he hadn't said anything because he didn't want to break Roier's trust, and he lives by that idea even now almost two years after their marriage.
If Roier wants to tell him something, he will. It isn't Cellbit's place to push.
Cellbit checks out Roier's ass appreciatively.
"Everything you wear makes your butt look big," he replies.
Roier nods and smiles, more than content with that answer, and he goes to the other side of his dressing room to start putting his makeup on.
Cellbit tries to make it to every one of "Melissa's" shows. He's a good husband, he wants to support Roier in everything he does.
...And he can't sleep anymore unless he has Roier by his side. Does that make him clingy?
He yawns, anyway, and he leans back and slumps in his chair. He might move to the dressing room's sofa, he's exhausted. (He might not be able to sleep without Roier, but he can rest his eyes, at least.)
"Is it okay if I stay back here?" he asks. "I need to lay down."
Roier glances at him through his mirror, concern lining his face. "Are you okay?"
Cellbit waves his concerns aside. "I'm just a little tired. I don't think I'm going to fall asleep, but I don't want to accidentally pass out during your show. That would be bad for business."
Roier's eyebrows furrow, just slightly. "Are you sure?"
"I mean, if it's okay-"
"No!" Roier cuts him off so quickly that he even seems to surprise himself. "I mean. It's okay, but you might not be comfortable. I can try and find you a pillow?"
His voice is shaking, just slightly. Hm.
"Nah, I'm good," Cellbit replies. He shrugs his jacket off and balls it up in his arms. "I've slept in worse places before."
"If- if you're sure, then go ahead."
Something feels... off. Maybe it's just because Cellbit is tired, but something is just. Weird.
But Roier eventually leaves the dressing room, though not without giving Cellbit a big fat messy lipstick-covered kiss on the lips.
Cellbit moves to the sofa, and he pillows his head on his jacket, and he closes his eyes, and he... he falls asleep. Just barely, because his dream is a faded memory around him, but. But.
But Venom isn't there.
-
The third stage of the dream is the coldest. It gnaws at Cellbit's brain, because it was the middle of January when his parents died. He was alone and under the bridge and covered in blood and absolutely freezing.
The dream doesn't ever go on past the bridge. He always just sits there shivering until he wakes up unless Venom shows up.
So he sits, and he shivers, and he waits to wake up. His body is crying, and the tears are freezing to his cheeks. He can't breathe. He can't stop thinking of... of... fuck, who is that girl? The one who chased Cellbit out of the house. The one with no face but the same voice as him.
A police car speeds over the bridge above him. It's going to his house, he knows this. The morning after the bridge, he snuck back towards his house, and the police car was still there. So was the girl. So were his parents bodies, wrapped in sheets and being carried to a Federation-white van.
He's a mistake. [She] was always better than him. [She] never hurt anybody. It isn't fair!
He sobs and buries his face in his knees. He won't sleep tonight, Cellbit remembers staying up all night because he couldn't close his eyes without seeing his parents die in front of him, and he still can't close his eyes without seeing it.
"I'm a monster," he whimpers, the first time he'd ever spoken those words, but not the last. (Later, he would try to embrace them and become the monster the media labeled him as, but it didn't help.)
There's a snarl above him, and then there's Venom standing above him with its fangs bared.
"I-" Cellbit chokes, forced to repeat what he'd said all those years ago. "I need to turn myself in. I have to!"
He stands. Venom moves to block him, grabbing onto his shoulders and holding him in place.
"There have to be healer heroes," Cellbit reasons. "They can fix them."
(They can't, and they won't.)
If possible, Venom looks distraught. The darkness wavers around it, and that's when Cellbit realizes that this is the closest they've really gotten to each other. This close, he can almost make out a face hidden behind Venom's teeth, buried deep within its mouth. But it's too dark, but if he looks hard enough...
Venom steps back, and he tears the bridge apart, and Cellbit finds himself face-to-face with-
-
Roier is cooking dinner tonight, and it smells wonderful. Of course it does, Roier's the one cooking it. Everything he cooks is wonderful, because he's wonderful.
Cellbit sits at the table watching. The kids are all in the other room doing homework, and it's almost peaceful.
Roier slips with the spatula and drops it into the pan. He swears and scoops it out and swears again as the oil inside burns him.
Again, almost peaceful.
Cellbit swiftly stands from his chair and goes to help Roier.
"Here, let me-"
Roier lightly smacks his hand. "Não, não. Go away."
"Mmm, what if I wanna stay with you?"
He slips an arm around Roier's waist and snuggles up against his back. He rests his chin on Roier's shoulder and watches a beautiful smile spread across Roier's face.
"I guess it's fine," Roier sighs, playing up the theatrics. "I guess."
And then it's peaceful once more. Cellbit watches Roier cook, and he pays special attention to Roier's biceps. (Sue him, his husband is hot.)
But then, in the other room, Richarlyson starts shouting:
"This is stupid!"
"Calm down," Bobby drawls. "It's just multiplication, let me see-"
"No, I can do it!"
Cellbit tenses. Roier doesn't seem to notice, and that's fine. It's nothing for either of them to worry about.
"You've literally been working on that for hours," Bobby argues. "Let me see."
"Não!"
Quietly, Pepito pipes up with, "I wanna see!"
"No!" Richarlyson yells. "I can- I can do it!"
"Let me see," Pepito pleads.
(Cellbit can't see.)
"Fuck you, give me the homework," Bobby snaps.
"Fuck you, it's mine!" Richarlyson exclaims.
(Cellbit can't breathe.)
"You literally can't even do it," Bobby mocks. "Give it."
(Cellbit can't-)
The world dissolves around him, and all he can see is his father's body sprawled across the floor and his mother across from him still muttering about how useless she is as he still muttered about how useless he is and he's both 26 years old and eight and he can't breathe and and and and and-
"Cellbit!" he hears. Two warm, gentle hands settle on his cheeks, and he blinks, and he's in his own kitchen. With his husband. Crying.
"It's fine," Roier whispers. He presses his forehead against Cellbit's, eyes slipping shut. "It isn't going to happen again. You're fine. They're fine. It's fine."
Cellbit blinks. The kitchen sounds miles and miles away, but he still heard that, and he knows for certain that he not once has told anybody about the night he killed his parents.
He swallows, fresh tears stinging at his eyes. "What isn't going to happen again?"
Roier tenses, but he doesn't move. His eyes squeeze even further shut, but he doesn't move. His mouth narrows into a pencil-thin line, but he doesn't move.
Cellbit can barely feel his hands, but he still moves his arms to hold Roier around the middle. The kids are still fighting in the background, but... but he can't handle them right now.
In a minute.
"Do we have to talk about it?" Roier hesitantly asks.
Cellbit's answer is immediate: "No. Just... sorry. I'm sorry."
Roier's brow furrows. "'Sorry'? Sorry for what, eh?"
"You shouldn't have to see all... all that. I don't even want to talk about it, but-"
"No, shut up. I'm sorry for sneaking into your dreams every night. It kinda just happens, I don't control it, but... it happened, and you were so sad, and I wanted to help."
Cellbit smiles faintly. His own eyes slip shut, and he can almost not see the bodies this time.
"You do help," he responds. "You help more than you could ever imagine, even outside of the dreams."
He tips his head up to kiss Roier, soft and brief and gentle.
Against Cellbit's lips, Roier mutters, "I can stop."
Cellbit shakes his head. "Don't worry about it. Now that I know it's you, I can stop freaking out about a buff scary monster guy haunting me."
Roier huffs out a quiet laugh. "I can try and be less scary, but I don't control that, either."
"It's still you. Just... God, does this make me a monsterfucker?"
Roier's laugh is much louder this time. He bites Cellbit's bottom lip before pulling back.
Cellbit's eyes open, and he looks into Roier's, and he can see the love in them, and he can feel the love in his own.
God-damn, how did he get this lucky?
"Who are you calling a monster?" Roier demands. He pinches Cellbit's side and turns back to the stove. "Fuck you, sleep alone tonight. I don't even care."
Cellbit smiles and invades his husband's space once more. He hooks his chin over Roier's shoulder, and he sighs against Roier's cheek.
"Te amo," he says. He presses a chaste kiss to the side of Roier's jaw.
Roier's ears turn red, but his face betrays no emotion.
"Your breath smells," he says, a smile teasing at his own lips. "Go brush your teeth before we eat."
Cellbit rolls his eyes, but he leaves to go do as he's told if only to try and finish panicking on his own and try and calm down before dinner.
He passes through the living room, and he sees Bobby at the table helping Richarlyson with his homework.
Some things do change, after all.
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patriwoso · 1 year ago
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an overwhelming feeling
alexia putellas x reader
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You were never one for the screams of a crowd, the loud noise freaking you out and making you feel under a spotlight.
“Oh my god, Lex…” You grab her arm as the bus pulls up. “I don’t like this, I feel sick.”
The federation had taken the team to Ibiza and decided on an open top bus parade to celebrate the success of the world cup win.
What you didn’t quite expect was the hundreds and thousands of fans stood behind the barrier screaming your names as you got off the bus.
“Stay with me, mi amor.” Alexia squeezes your hand slightly before dropping it to avoid the attention of the fans.
You sign a few shirts and smile slightly for photos.
Not taken a liking to this situation you head straight for Alexia who was signing a shirt for a young boy.
You put your hand on her back slightly, making her aware of your presence.
“You ok?” She checks, looking at you before turning back to another fan to sign their phone case.
You look at her with eyes that tell her more than words.
“Last one guys.” She calls out, handing the pen back before wrapping her arm around your waist and walking you into the hotel.
“Te amo” She kisses the side of your head softly.
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magics-neptunes-things · 5 months ago
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Olympics Games (One Love 9)
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Hi guys :)
I don't want to talk about today's game so straight to the new chapter from One Love ♥
Please enjoy :)
TW : None
(1) | (2) | (3) | (4) | (5) | (6) | (7) | (8)
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Ona is tired. Like fucking really tired. She never felt as exhausted as she is right now after loosing the semi-finale of the Olympics Games. And what is rather alarming, is that she’s not only physically tired but her mental health is pretty low too.
Like some of her national teammates, Mariona for example, she played a lot of games during the last season. She played during the World Cup last year, the National Cup too and now she has the Olympics to play. The tiredness was easier to manage while they were winning, but it’s not the case anymore and she’s exhausted.
She’s exhausted to have to fight against her Federation and she’s exhausted to have to deal with the shit their coach is doing with the national team. They need someone who fight for them and know what she did and it’s not something they have now. Without pretension, Spain's team has some of the best players in the world and they aren’t in the Finale.
Ona knew that Lucy reserved a plane to come to see her play Saturday at Paris, not Friday at Lyon. She felt so exhausted and angry after their lost game that she didn’t have the strength to cry. She hated that game, hated the way the staff made them play and hated the way Cata Coll was the one who took the lost on her back.
She almost burst into tears when she saw that her family was waiting for her outside the stadium after the game, and she let herself being wrapped and cradled in the maternal embrace of her mother. Something she hadn’t done in years, probably at the beginning of her teenage era.
She just wants to sleep until she feels rested, go home to her dog and her girlfriend. But that’s not possible because her girlfriend is in fucking London, and that’s basically what she said while crying in Aitana’s arms way later that night, when her friend came to see how she was doing.
She had Lucy on FaceTime earlier and she managed to keep a more or less neutral face, even if the English woman obviously felt the disappointment she could feel. She had the right words to comfort Ona, like always, and it really worked. Until Ona realizes that it’s really all she will have during the next months, while she was brushing her hair after her shower. And that’s when Aitana came.
Ona doesn’t know that her friend texted Lucy right after that to inform her about Ona’s state of mind. She repeat everything that got out of Ona’s mouth even if it was in a confuse way. But Aitana managed to understand everything and was able to repeat it correctly to Lucy.
Lucy was supposed to be at training on Friday, so Ona doesn’t think anything more when Laia Aleixandri and Aitana take her outside of the hotel to grab a coffee somewhere. Ona loved coffee, they only had to say that word to convince her to follow them.
“Who suggested you that place again?” Laia asks Aitana while they were entering the shop.
“Oh, a dear friend of mine who played here for three years before going to Manchester and then finally coming to Barcelona”
Aitana smirks while she looks at Ona from the corner of her eyes, the younger one raising her eyebrow while looking back at her. Of course she understands that Aitana is talking about Lucy. The shop is almost empty at that time of the day. The place is what you probably find on Pinterest when you write “coffee shop”, Ona thinks. It’s all wood, peaceful colors and amazing smells, mix of coffee and pastries.
“Here, there she is actually.”
Ona’s head makes two abrupt movements, one to go on Aitana face (she was looking at the menu hanging on the wall while trying to decrypt those Frenches words when Aitana spoke again) and another to go where she was looking.
And actually, yes. Here she was, Lucy Bronze, casually sitting on a booth, grinning at her.
Ona’s mother probably wouldn’t approve of the words that come out of her daughter’s mouth at this particular time, but Ona doesn’t care. She doesn’t care either about the other people who are inside the shop too, because her girlfriend is here and that’s all it matters.
Lucy got up while the Spaniard came to her senses and that she joins her before passing her arms around her waist.
“Hi” Lucy smiles at Aitana and Laia when Ona buried her face in her neck and hair.
She’s glad that with time they decide to be less strict about the public display of affection. At first, they didn’t want the world to talk about their relationship more than their football skills. Plus, Lucy didn’t want Ona to have to face some of her creepy fans, but it was still happening anyway. So, one day, she surprised Ona by grabbing her by her waist from behind, in the middle of a pitch. And since then, they aren’t really thinking about it.
“What do you want to drink?” Lucy asks the two other girls.
“Nothing, we were just bringing you your girlfriend” Aitana smiles.
“Well now that you are here you still can take something” Lucy points. “Their latte are amazing”
“She has a point” Laia smirks.
Laia and Aitana went to ask for their drink at the counter and during all this time Ona hasn’t let go of Lucy. The dark haired woman puts her total attention on her girlfriend at that moment, lifting her face by sliding a finger under her chin.
“Hey” Lucy says softly, making Ona smiles.
“Holà”
“You look exhausted”
It wasn’t a remark saying in a bad way, Lucy is more concerned about her girlfriend than anything. She already saw the dark circles under Ona’s eyes when they called each other but it’s more impressive here and now. She frowns, realizing in what state her girlfriend is.
“I am” Ona shrugs.
Lucy doesn’t have time to say anything else because Laia and Aitana were coming back to say goodbye.
“You have to be at the hotel in four hours Oni, don’t be late, yes?” Laia reminds her.
“Don’t worry” Ona smiles softly.
They went out, Laia kissing Ona's cheek, and Ona turns again in Lucy’s direction. She has realized by now that Lucy hasn’t command anything for herself, which is pretty strange. She might be the coffee addict in their relationship, but Lucy likes it too.
“What are the plans?”
“Well, at first we are going to take some drinks and something to eat. And then I’ll take you to one of my special spots around here”
“Sounds perfect” Ona smiles.
Ona follows Lucy to the counter and looks one more time to the menu to choose a drink. She asks for a cold caffe latte while Lucy asks for a Macchiato. They take some pastries to go with it, Ona choosing to follow Lucy’s lead about it. As long as there are some with chocolate, she will be okay anyway.
When they get out, Lucy takes Ona’s hand in hers and the gesture itself makes Ona’s heart fluttered. They don’t talk a lot during the walk to Lucy’s secret spot, just enjoying each other presence. Sometimes, Lucy points a building or a park to Ona, mentioning some memories she has there.
They finally arrive somewhere next to one of the two rivers traversing Lyon, and after several yomps, they finally are where Lucy wanted to take Ona. She never lets Ona's hand go one time.
“Tadam!” the English woman sings, making Ona laughs.
“It’s beautiful” Ona says, smiling softly while looking around them.
They can see a lot of the river from her and the other side, but she’s pretty sure that they aren’t visible themselves.
“Beautiful view for a beautiful girl” Lucy winks at her. “Come on, sit with me.”
Ona obliged but chose to sit on Lucy’s lap rather than the big rocks around them. The former Barcelona player doesn’t seems to mind though, letting an appreciative hums passes her lips. Ona puts her head on Lucy’s shoulders, decided to enjoy their closeness.
“I’m happy you’re here” Ona whispers when she remembers herself that Lucy shouldn’t actually be here.
“A little birdy told me that my girlfriend was struggling away in Paris. Couldn’t let her alone, could I?”
“Is this little birdy called Aitana, by any chance?”
“It is” Lucy laughs before kissing Ona’s cheek. “I would have preferred that my girlfriend talk to me about that herself though”
Ona bites her lips, feeling a little guilty for hiding things to Lucy. It was easier to do by phone than in real life. When they are together, it’s impossible for her to do it. Lucy is able to read her expressions and her body language easier than anyone. Sometimes, Ona even has the feeling that Lucy can understands her better than herself.
“I didn’t want to worry you. I’m just tired, really. I will be okay.”
Lucy hums, not really sure about that statement. It looks more than a things Ona is telling herself or repeating to her friends and family, to reassure them. She knows very well how much worried her mother can be for her daughter.
“I know you will be okay. You’re the strongest person I know. But that doesn’t mean you are feeling fine now or that you aren’t allowed to feel a little low.”
Ona sighs softly, stroking Lucy's arm with her fingertips.
“It’s just frustrating you know? We are good and we were supposed to go on the final. But what are we supposed to do when they manage us that way?”
“I know” Lucy sighs too.
She really wants to help her girlfriend but like a little more than one year ago before the World Cup, there is nothing she can do. Other than hearing Ona’s frustration and sympathize with her. Which she tries to do the best as she could, of course.
“You deserved to go to the finale. But you still have a medal to fight for. And I beg your pardon if I’m wrong, but it seems like you like Bronze, no?”
Ona, who was looking at the river in front of them, smirk before turning her face to Lucy. The English woman was fighting against her smile, trying to keep a straight face. Which is almost impossible to do.
“You haven’t even kiss me and you start with your awful flirts attempts already?”
Lucy laughs and puts a hand on her girlfriend’s cheek, the other staying where their both were before, on Ona’s waist to stabilize her.
“You are right, first the kiss”
Ona is smiling when Lucy presses her lips against hers. They have kissed a lot already, an infinite number of times. They shared tender kisses, shy kisses, hot kisses, goodbye kisses and reunion kisses. But Ona can swear without a doubt that every time she has the same feelings to fly somewhere above the ground when Lucy kisses her.
She actually groans in annoyance when Lucy stops the kiss, crossing her arms behind Lucy’s neck for another kiss. This one is maybe a little less innocent than the first, but she doesn’t care. She missed her girlfriend, she needs comfort and she knows that almost no one can see them.
When it ends, Lucy takes Ona against her, the head of the younger one finding her place back on her shoulder.
“I’m sorry you had to cancel your travel to Paris” Ona mumbles finally.
“Don’t. You don’t have to excuse yourself for anything. I shouldn’t have anticipated things like I did, I’m the one who is sorry. I shouldn’t have put more pressure on you like this”
“You haven’t…”
Ona starts to answer, frowning, but Lucy puts a finger on her lips to make her stay silent. Their gazes cross and Lucy takes off her finger from Ona’s lips only to put hers against hers again.
“No football talks until you have to go back to the hotel”
Ona rolls her eyes with a smile but accepts gladly, sitting to be able to look at Lucy easier than before. She missed her like crazy, so why not to take advantage of this time to look at her the more possible? She always have been fond of her face, her smile, her hair, her eyes... Everything. But Lucy soon feels a little uneasy under her girlfriend’s gaze. She’s usually the one who is creeping on Ona, especially in the morning when the Spaniard is always asleep longer than her.
“What are you doing?” the English woman asks.
“Admiring you” Ona answers while Lucy rolls her eyes. “You are so beautiful. I want our children to have your eyes. And your smile.”
“Nah. They all will be mini-Ona” Lucy smirks. “With your beautiful smile, hair and freckles”
Ona pouts when Lucy boop her nose with her fingers, but it’s quickly erased when Lucy kiss her again.
“Barcelona agreed to give me ten days of rest after the Olympics” Ona informed her.
“Finally, you will be able to breath. What will you do during that time?”
Ona shrugs without looking at Lucy. She wants to go to London and having some days with Lucy at least, even if the weather seems to have already said goodbye to summer. But for a maybe stupid reason, she doesn’t want to be the one asking if she can come. She doesn’t want to impose herself in her girlfriend’s life.
“Probably sleep all day long” Ona finally answers.
“Yeah?”
Ona nods and there is a moment of silence.
“Want to come to sleep in depressing and cloudy London?”
Ona smiles and nods again, this time while looking at Lucy with a smile. Lucy is smirking too, one of her arms always around Ona waist. She kisses her hair this time, when Ona sinks her face under her chin.
“Can I take Coco with me? Even if he seems have a blast in my family’s trail, I miss him.”
“Of course you can. Narla will be happy to see him again”
Ona smiles wider and sink even deeper in Lucy. She misses the comfort of her arms. She’s not really used to lose anymore and the only time it happened last year, Lucy was here with her. It will be a process she will need to start to learn again.
“Did you come her a lot while you were in Lyon?” Ona asks casually.
“Only when I needed to clean my head. But I usually came her alone.”
“Usually?”
Of course, it was the word who seems the most important for Ona. It makes Lucy smiles and rolls her eyes again.
“Nah, more like always”
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When Lucy walks back Ona to her hotel, she offered her a big hug and a long kiss goodbye, even if they know they will see each other after the game. It’s only when they heard Alexia loudly clearing her throat that they remember where they were. Lucy looked over Ona’s head while Ona turns herself to see the Spanish’s captain looking at them with her arms crossed on her chest.
It might be an impressive sight, but Ona spots quickly the hidden slight smile and the fun in Alexia’s eyes.
“I better go” Ona smiles at Lucy.
“You better” Lucy laughs before kissing her one last time. “Go, Superstar. See you after the game”
Ona rolls her eyes and keep Lucy’s hand in hers as long as possible when she starts to walk to Alexia. The blonde passes an arm around Ona’s shoulders, who take a last look at Lucy before entering the hotel.
“See you at the stadium, Bronzey” Alexia says at the same time.
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Like the other time when she came to watch Ona playing, Lucy is sitting near her family. The “O. Battle 2” clan is today joined by Ona’s grandparents and some of her cousins. Lucy knows them all, the Catalan girl having took her at every birthday or family celebration since last summer.
She was next to Ona’s brother, listening to him talk with her father in Catalan. And she’s proud of herself when she realizes that she understands almost everything. She turns when she feels someone putting a hand on her shoulder, smiling when she sees Lia Wälti, wagging discreetly like every time.
“Lia, hi!” Lucy smiles before hugging her.
She knows well the Swiss woman now, having watched some Spain’s games with her since she was with Ona.
“Mind if I seat next to you for a bit?” she asks after they great each other.
“Of course not. Are you here alone?”
“Kind of. Mario’s family is here, but…”
She shrugs, looking at the field where Germany just entered to train. Her unfinished sentence makes frown Lucy, who looks at her with concern.
“Aren’t you getting along with them?”
“I hardly know them honestly. I saw them like four times since I’m with Mariona. When I come to see her in Barcelona they are obviously still in Mallorca”
Lucy nods softly. She has to admit that she knows Ona’s family a lot better than Ona knows hers. She never asked herself how Ona feels when she’s with the Bronze, but the younger always seemed happy to pass time with her brother’s kids or her parents. She seems to have a great bond with Jorge, and Sophie too.
“How is Mario?”
Lucy feels a soft guilt, she should maybe have checked a little more for her former teammate and frien. They are close after all and moving both in London at the same time. Lia shrugs one more time.
“She’s tired. I really hope they will win today, I’m a little scared for her mental health if they don’t” she sighs softly. “How’s Ona?”
“Same things. At least after that they will have some days to rest”
Lia hums softly. They don’t have to say what they think about the Liga’s schedule and the Women Football’s in general. They both think the same and understand each other quickly.
“I’m happy that Mario will have less games to play next year. I was concerned about her having an injury, even if I was the one getting one after all”
Lucy smiles at that. It’s honestly a miracle that her knee seems to be always fine after all the games she played last year. Lucy got a little distracted when the speaker starts to present both teams, frowning when she hears “Felicita Rauch”. She hasn’t realized until now that Ona will play against her ex.
“Oh shit” she mumbles.
“What is it?”
Lia got distracted too, but only because Mariona came on the pitch with some of her teammates and staff members. Like every time, Mariona looks for her and send her a wink, which Lia answer with a heart with her fingers.
“That’s Ona’s ex” she mumbles again, indicating Feli by a nod.
“Oh.”
Lia doesn’t really what to answer, she knows Feli well, they played together at Potsdam for four years before she went for Arsenal. It was before the things between Ona and Feli, though.
“Didn’t she mention anything?”
“No” Lucy frowns.
“Probably because it doesn’t have any importance for her” Lia says with a gently smile.
Lucy groans in answer. She still struggles some times with her new jealousy, who appeared when she starts dating Ona. She hates when people she doesn’t know touch her girlfriend, not knowing what intentions are behind that kind of touch. She doesn’t mind Ona’s friends hugging her of course. But having to play against her ex, it’s something different.
“Have you already been in that situation?” Lucy asks soon after.
“Not really”
“I hope she won’t take advantage of that game to try to reconnect with Ona” Lucy frowns.
Lia giggles softly next to her, making Lucy stop glaring at the poor German player to look at the Swiss Woman. With all of that, she hasn’t realized that Ona has entered the pitch too and that the Spain’s team has started the training.
“I’m sorry, but she probably knows you both are together and that’s it will be a lost cause”
That’s true, and finally it’s wasn’t a bad idea to stop hiding things, Lucy thinks. She seems a little relieved when Lia points that fact.
“Plus, you are wearing a Spanish jersey with her name and hanging with her family in the stand, this is probably another indication of how much you are into each other”
Lucy relaxes completely this time, her shoulders falling back a few centimeters. Lia is right once again, and she is glad about it. As if to press this point, Ona’s dad comes back with a carton of beer, holding one to Lucy with an affectionate pat on the back. He proposes one to Lia too, who refuses with a smile.
She keeps an eye on Feli anyway, after seeing that Ona doesn’t seem to take one look at the German team. She plays as a defender, just like Ona, so they shouldn’t have to face each other a lot during the game. Lucy feels like a creeping fan when she looks attentively at how Ona and Feli greats each other at the beginning of the match, but other than a smile, there is nothing. Ona has a full match face.
(She always found her sexy at that very moment)
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In the end, they didn’t win. It would be irrelevant to talk about Montse Tome management once again, Lucy thought. She would have preferred to find her girlfriend with bronze around her neck, not to see her sad face and the sadness of her other friends.
“What does that bitch want?” Lucy grown when she sees that Felicitas is actually coming to Ona.
She looks at her tapping softly on Ona’s shoulder while the girl was standing next to Alexia, Salma and Mariona. Lucy isn’t able to understand what they are saying, but she sees Ona’s hesitation at what Feli is asking her. Then she shrugs and nods before getting out of her jersey to hand it to her former girlfriend.
“Is she…?” Lia asks next to her.
“Looks like it” Lucy shrugs at her turn.
If Felicitas puts Ona’s jersey without hesitation, she sees Ona looking for her in the stand. It’s only when Lucy smirks at her that the Spaniard puts it too, making what it can be described as a slight smile.
“Can’t wait to see Twitter going mad” Lucy comments.
She hears Ona’s family laughing with Lia. She can’t herself explain why it doesn’t bother her, but just after their exchange of jersey Feli went back to her team and Ona seems to ask the permission to go in the locker room. She jogs to go with Patri, relief on her shoulders.
Half an hour later, when Ona comes to her family in the VIP section, she looks once again exhausted. She’s wearing her Spain’s training kit again and goes right to Lucy’s arms. The English woman smiles softly, hugging softly Ona.
“I’m sorry about the defeat” Lucy whispers in Ona’s hear.
“It’s over now. I just want to sleep for four days” Ona mumbles, somewhere on Lucy’s shoulder.
The dark-haired woman laughs softly, releasing Ona for her to be able to say hi to her family. The Battle seems sad for Ona but relieved to see that she will have some rest, finally.
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The next day, they are on a plane for London, Ona half-asleep on Lucy’s shoulder. Coco is on the end of the plane with other animals, sleeping peacefully like his human. Lucy has passed a hand under Ona’s shirt to stroke her back softly, helping the younger one to feel relaxed.
“Are you sleeping?” Lucy asks softly.
“Only resting my eyes” Ona mumbles, making Lucy laughs.
“Can I ask you a question?”
“Sure”
She yawns but sit a little better, just to be able to watch Lucy’s face while the older one is talking. Lucy needs several seconds to focus and stop beaming in front of her girlfriend’s cuteness.
“Why did you get your ex’s shirt?”
“It’s sound so bad saying like this” Ona winces. “But I don’t know. She asks and I say yes. And then I looked for you before wearing it and when you smiled at me I thought it meant that you were okay with it?”
“I was” Lucy assures her quickly. “But I was wondering... We never really talked about it, are you still talking to her?”
“No” Ona shakes her head. “She likes my Instagram's posts from time to time but that’s all. This jersey’s swap doesn’t mean anything, really.”
“Ok. Great, because you made the social media going crazy”
Ona smiles when she sees her girlfriend relax against the back of her seat. She kisses her jaw and then her neck, it’s impossible for her to reach another part of her from her position.
“I don’t care what they say. I’m in love with you.”
“I’m a lucky girl” Lucy smirks.
“Nah. I’m the lucky one.”
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