#working out some preliminary theories

[arcane-ish]

Preliminary Zaundads timeline

(note: this is not a great, story, it's just what I think fits the facts presented the most)

Vander either falls in love with his miner buddy Silco or they knew each other first and became miners together.

They strike up friendships with their miner budies, Felicia, Connel and Sevika. Maybe they all meet in this shack to spend their breaks or plot their revolution.

At some point they organize. They create or take over the drop. According to Vi's mom they "turned a crack in the earth into a thriving commuity" on the very day where Vi's mom tells them that she's having a kid and Vander names the kid. She credits both Vander and Silco with having had that idea of creating the thriving community.

At this point Vander is satisfied with what they've achieved (We're done).

[admittedly, that could be sarcasm because he knows that they still have work ahead of them] However, Silco is thinking of more, of Zaun. Felicia describes their situation "living week to week" and says that that's "a lot of shit down here" that she would have to protect Vi from.

Vander seems to be into the idea of raising children and already talks about raising more than just a single one.

She talks about carving Zaun out of the bedrock through menial work ("blisters") and that Silco and Vander will figure it out together. Silco toasts to Zaun. Vander only toasts to blisters and bedrock (note that he calls back to that in the letter to writes to Silco after nearly killing him).

Vi gets born, Powder gets born. It seems Mylo and Claggor are sort of around?

Note that even though Powder and Vi are older, their mom and dad still work as miners.

My theory:

1.) Whatever Vander and Silco and the others were doing, they probably funded themselves through the mines? That's why Felicia and Connel kept mining. Or maybe they do deeper tunnels for additional housing? My theory is still that their big thing was to take over the mine they were working in and running it themselves (seize the means of production!) and they were able to fund a their thriving community.

2.) At this point Vander and Silco's relationship becomes more and more unhappy. And Vander distracts himself by throwing himself more and more into his role as an uncle and living vicariously through Felicia and Connel's relationship.

Vi and Powder apparently have a very happy childhool.

However something happens, leading to the Day of Ash uprising. (maybe something threatens their "thriving community") Where Felicia dies and Vander snaps and attacks Silco. However, he afterwards feels bad and writes him a letter, but Silco keeps his distance, not returning for years later.

Now, granted, most of this is still pretty unsatifying. For example, everything about Vi and Powder's childhood looks way too pristine and clean. Mining looks too happy and clean for how shit it should be.

Even Vander's Lanes after he drove out Silco were never that clean. (this is probably my hate for beardless Vander talking, maybe beardless Vander = Vander's self image of his more innocent self)

And that is aside that head canoning Vander and Silco running a criminal enterprise together is just way more fun than them completely sanely funding it through respectable mining.

How exactly did Vander get his Hound of Underground name anyway? I like to headcanon that he was a pit fighter like Vi, but was that before he became a miner or during or afterwards?

And how exactly did he get a reputation as a revolutionary at all when it feels that he barely did anything?

I'm just gonna pretend:

1.) Warwick is not dead. His healing factor will kick in. 2.) These are just the happy, sanitized, idealized memories of Vander's. We will get another flashback that will reveal that the truth was way darker and more fucked up and that Vander's happy memories were as fake as Viktor's happy cult community.

WHAT DO YOU MEAN THIS WILL PROBABLY NOT HAPPEN BECAUSE THERE'S ONLY THREE MORE EPISODES AND THOSE WILL BE DEDICATED TO OTHER STORYLINES THAT STILL NEED TO WRAP UP. I CAN'T HEAR YOU.

[yeet-me-dad-dy]

The Arcane - Chapter Four - Anomaly

Summary: You find an anomaly in Viktor's blood. He takes you down to see his old doctor. You meet Vander.

Characters: Viktor x Male Reader (Dr Raven) x Jayce (Eventually)

Warnings: Blood

Words: 2,408

After Viktor departed from your lab, you set the centrifuge, prepared a slide, poured yourself a drink, and sat down to examine his blood more closely. It was clear right away that something was wrong.

“What the…?” you mumbled as you gazed through the microscope.

His red blood cell count was fine and the cells were dispersed nicely – not too close together, not too far apart, not clumped up in groups. But there was an… anomaly. Around the white spot of hemoglobin at the center of each cell was a blue ring.

That’s why his blood seems purple. The red and blue are mixing. You made a quick, preliminary note of the observation. Without more testing, there was no way to know whether this anomaly was strictly discoloration, or if it was something more serious. Was it preventing the cells from transporting oxygen throughout his body? You would have to separate a cell and look more closely at the… mutation? Toxin? You weren’t sure. Normally, this kind of mystery would delight you. You were excited at the prospect of making new discoveries, of course, but you were also worried. Would the research you were conducting on your own blood be able to fix a problem you’d never seen before and hadn’t accounted for during testing? The best way to find out what would happen if you mixed your blood with Viktors was to do just that.

You prepared a secondary slide, focused the microscope, then pricked your finger. Carefully, you picked up a tiny bit of your blood on the end of a scalpel and dropped it into Viktor’s on the slide. You peered through the lens, holding your breath. With other samples of diseased blood, the common trend was that your blood would mix with the foreign sample and dissolve whatever anomaly it found present, whether that be an infection or something else, rendering it harmless. From there, the theory was that this bi-product would be filtered out of the blood when it traveled through the liver, and then be disposed of in the urine.

That was only a theory, however, because none of your subjects ever survived long enough to prove it. For some, death took seconds. For others, minutes, hours, or even days. For all of them, though, it was excruciating.

And this was why: After a few seconds of contact with your blood, Viktor’s cells began to burst. You expected no less. The main focus of your research was figuring out how to make your blood less volatile. You couldn’t figure out why it had the effect it did, and while some of your research had proven promising in delaying the inevitable, you had been unable to stop it entirely.

This small test was a good sign, despite the outcome. This proved that your blood could remove the anomaly from Viktor’s cells if it turned out to be harmful. You just had to find a way to get it to work without killing him, which is what you’d been trying to do for the last hundred years with no success. You sighed and leaned back in your chair, pinching the bridge of your nose. There were other tests to run, other observations to be made. It could be that the blue ring was nothing more than a strange pigmentation phenomenon and wasn’t hurting him at all. It could be that his previous doctors had been so focused on this strange blue ring that they had completely missed a more obvious answer. The human body, so intricate and complex… Everything was connected. If one thing went wrong, everything was affected.

You stopped by Heimerdinger’s office later that evening, around five, with dinner for Viktor.

“The apple wasn’t enough?” he asked slyly when you set the bag of take-out on the desk next to him.

“I’m afraid it’s going to take more than an apple to keep this doctor away. Sorry,” you smirked.

“What if I throw it hard enough?”

You chuckled and pulled up an extra chair to sit next to him. He put down the notes he was organizing for Heimerdinger and opened the bag to see what you had brought him. A fresh, hot, healthy meal awaited him, and while he didn’t usually have much of an appetite, the smell of it was making his mouth water.

“Any breakthroughs?” he asked as he fished the fork out of the bag.

“Breakthroughs? No. Curious observations? Many.”

“Do tell.”

“There’s still more testing to be done, but what I can tell you is that your blood is healthy, except for one thing.”

“Oh?”

You nabbed the orange out of the bag and peeled it for him.

“There’s an… anomaly," you explained. A blue ring around the hemoglobin in each red cell that shouldn’t be there.”

“Anomaly indeed,” Viktor agreed, his brows furrowed. “So what does this mean?”

“Like I said, there’s more testing to be done to find out what that ring actually is and what effect its having on your body. It could just be pigmentation.”

“But then, what’s causing it?”

You shrugged.

“That’s the million dollar question. A question I’m afraid I’ll have to take a lot more samples in order to answer. Samples of more than just your blood.”

He tilted his head to the side, not quite understanding.

“Plasma and bone, primarily.”

Oh. Those were not pleasant samples to give.

“But those can wait for now” you assured him with a soft smile when you saw the sick look on his face.

After dinner, you took Viktor to your lab to show him the slides and explained what he was seeing, chatting at length about the possible causes and effects of the mysterious blue ring. Then, when the sun finally dipped below the horizon, it was time for Viktor to show you to the Undercity, where you hoped his medical records could be found.

The Undercity was damp and smelly, with a comforting darkness pierced by blinding neon lights. The gaze of every Trencher was on you and Viktor as you wound through the narrow, muddy streets, some glittering with greed as they took in your expensive clothes, and others darkened by fear when your red-hot gaze found theirs. You were on edge and Viktor could tell.

“Relax, will you?” he said as he limped along.

“Not sure I can do that,” you chuckled dryly.

The streets became thinner, the buildings more dense and compact the farther down you traveled. The deeper he led you, the thicker and more oppressive the air became, as well. It didn’t take long for Viktor to start coughing.

“Stop, Viktor,” you said, placing a hand gently on his shoulder. “I can find my way from here. I want you to go back where the air is nicer.”

He looked like he wanted to argue, but another coughing fit overtook him. When he finally got control of it, he nodded.

“I’ll met you on the bridge.”

“No,” you shook your head. “I want you to stay close. Meet me at the edge The Lanes.”

Worried I’m going to get mugged, are you?” he smirked.

“Of course I am.”

His smirk fell, and he frowned.

“The people of The Undercity aren’t animals, doctor.”

“No, but some of them are desperate, and you would make an easy mark.”

“That applies to people in Piltover, too, you know.”

“I know. Which is why I would be asking you to stick close if we were up there, too.”

He sighed. He wanted to be offended, to argue that he could take care of himself, but instead, he found your protectiveness… endearing.

“At the edge of The Lanes, then,” he agreed.

It wasn’t a long walk back, and anyone who so much as looked at Viktor shied away when they saw you watching. He would be fine. As he limped away, you turned and continuing deeper into The Fissures. The air down here wasn’t necessarily toxic anymore, thanks to the filtration system that House Kirraman had installed years ago. But it was still heavy, and, gods, the smell. Like sulfur and sewage. The people down here regarded you with mistrust. Topsiders didn't come down here unless they were there for shady dealings. You didn't belong... Or did you? You were scary enough to fit in, that was for sure, but your clothes betrayed your status. You yourself were an anomaly in the veins of The Undercity.

You approached one of the first people you encountered, but she scurried away, hissing obscenities, before you could ask your question. It took you quite some time to find anyone willing to point you toward Viktor’s former doctor. When you did finally find him, you were not impressed in the least. Actually, you were appalled. The “hospital” was nothing more than a run-down shack. It may have been a proper hospital at one point, but now it was nothing more than dirt and grime on some old boards.

A bell chimed overhead when you opened the door and stepped inside. Somehow, the air in here was even stuffier than out there. You curled your lip, disgusted at the state of the place. It didn’t look like it had been cleaned in years. Bottles with various colored liquids filled shelves alongside ancient medical tools. You were thankful the glass on the bottles was so filthy. Some of the things floating in them were… questionable. You weren’t sure you wanted to know exactly what they contained.

An older man with a potbelly appeared from a door in the back. He wore a leather apron, stained with old, dried blood, and the frizzy white hair atop his head stuck out at odd angles. He was hunched and limped when he walked, and one of his eyes seemed to be glued permanently shut with some kind of greenish pus. He looked more like a mad scientist than a doctor.

“How can I help?” he asked with a voice like gravel, resting his fat, filthy hands on the reception desk.

“My name is Doctor Raven. I’m here regarding a former patient of yours, Viktor. I need his medical records.”

He didn’t react for a moment, and you wondered if he’d heard you at all. Finally, he nodded slowly.

“Viktor, yes… I remember now.”

“Do you have his records?” you asked.

He grumbled and looked around.

“I think… Yes…”

He shuffled back into the back room and was gone for ages before finally reappearing with a file. He handed it to you, and you were thankful you’d worn your gloves as you took it from him. You opened it. Three pages.

“This is it?” you asked, glancing up at him.

He shrugged.

“There wasn’t much to record. Bad bones, bad blood.”

You scoffed and shook your head.

“Thanks,” you mumbled as you turned to leave.

He cleared his throat loudly, catching your attention, and you heard him shuffle up behind you. He glared at you, his hand out, palm up.

Of course.

You fished a few coins out of your pocket and handed them to him, careful not to make contact.

You were frustrated and in poor spirits when you met back up with Viktor. He stood when you approached, eyes bright and curious.

“Did you find him?”

You held up the file.

“Not sure it was worth our time, but yes.”

He took the file and thumbed through it.

“This is it?” he asked.

“I asked the same thing.”

“I visited him hundreds of times while I lived down here, and this is all he has…” He shook his head. “Unbelievable.”

“I’ll make do,” you assured him. “Come on, let’s get out of here.”

You stuck close to his side as you picked your way back through the broken streets to the bridge, giving more than a few warning growls to those with greedy eyes and sticky fingers. You stopped halfway across.

“Go ahead,” you said. “I think I’m going to linger for a bit. I want to have a look around. This place disgusts me, I won’t lie, but… It’s also exactly the kind of place I want to help. The kind of people I want to help.”

Viktor smiled.

“Take your time, Doctor.”

You did take your time, talking with those that would give you the time of day, asking about their health and their woes. You knew that the Upper City didn’t care much for those below, but you didn’t realize the full extent of their neglect. You were glad that Viktor got out of there. Eventually, you found your way to a bar called The Last Drop. The barkeeper greeted you heartily and asked what you’d like to drink. You declined the drink politely and instead continued your investigation.

“Yeah, things can get pretty bad down here,” he said quietly. “We don’t have much in the way of medical attention, but the doctors we do have do what they can to help. On top of that, the food down here isn’t great. We have plenty of seafood, but fresh fruit and vegetables are few and far between.”

You nodded, listening intently. He leaned forward on the bar.

“What’s a fancy doctor like you doing down here anyway?” he asked, more quietly.

“I came with a patient, to get medical records from his former doctor. I’ve only been in Piltover for two days, and I have to admit, I’m not delighted to see how they treat this part of their population.”

He scoffed.

“Topside couldn’t care less about what goes on down here in the Trenches.”

“Yes, that’s the conclusion I came to as well,” you said quietly.

“Sure I can’t get you a drink?” he asked. “You look like you could use one.”

You chuckled.

“No, thank you. I should be heading back. Thanks for talking with me.”

You tried to give him some coin for his time and information, but he refused with a chuckle.

“No need for that, Doctor. You just do what you can to help the people down here, and we'll call it even. Hey, what’s your name, before you go?”

“Raven,” you answered as you stepped down from the barstool. “Doctor Raven.”

“Vander,” he said, offering his hand.

You didn’t want to touch the Fissures doctor, but Vander’s hand, you didn’t hesitate to shake.

“Until next time, then, Vander.”

You bid him farewell and made your way back toward home, following the path illuminated by the silver glow of the moon.

[moinstar]

Lesson 54 spoilers

"...So, tell me. What is it you're plotting, exactly?" Raphael eyed Diavolo with mild irritation in his tone.

He smiles apologetically, caught in an act and felt the need to explain now. "So, you can tell something's up, huh? I was afraid of this."

"It's odd enough that we're the only ones here. And then after we were attacked, your response seemed unusually tepid. There are so many red flags..," the gray-haired angel sighs. "Of course I can tell that something's going on."

Moin speaks up. "I'm guessing that has something to do with me?"

"Yes, it does. Though it's nothing you should feel bad about." Diavolo reassures, though it's not bringing relief to the burgundy-haired human girl.

"This is about your magic power, Moin. And what has been happening to it." Mephisto stresses it strongly.

"Yes, your power has been growing greater by the day. And then there was the incident with the hostile demon in Meowcao. That's when we realized that you weren't in full control of it." Lucifer added.

Simeon nods mildly, carefully regarding Mephisto, Lucifer, and Diavolo's statements. "And when Raphael was attacked earlier, it looked like Moin cast a barrier spell of some sort, but without an incantation. I'm guessing that in the heat of the moment, the spell must have gone off subconsciously."

"What exactly is happening to Moin's powers, we need a definitive answer to that question. Then we can take action if necessary. However, we thought we needed to spend a bit more time observing things from afar." -Diavolo

"Right, our theory was built on too many assumptions. They needed to be verified." -Lucifer

"...So you used the SF as a chance to do that." -Raphael

"That's right." -Diavolo

"Ah, that must be why there was a second preliminary test. You presented everyone with a problem that no ordinary student could solve." -Simeon

"In any case, Lord Diavolo, Lucifer, and I were the only ones to pass the second test." -Mephisto

"So, it worked out exactly as you'd hoped, then." Raphael gapes his mouth a little, coming to a realization. "...Unbelievable. You mean to tell me that the fiery rock that nearly hit Simeon and the beast that attacked us were both YOUR doing?"

"No, that was the work of demons who oppose the royal family. We'd never resort to such cheap tricks." -Mephisto

"However, we knew that if we were to hold the SF finals here, those demons would see it as a good opportunity to strike... That I cannot deny." -Diavolo

"Yes. We did know they were here, and we didn't try to stop them." Lucifer sighs defeatedly. "So in that sense, you might be able to argue that it was "our doing"."

Moin's eyebrows furrowed at this. If Diavolo knew about the opposition, why didn't he do something about it? Why did it have to go as far as almost risking their lives since that incident in Meowcao?

"There are still many lower tier demons who think that harming an exchange student would be a good way to damage Lord Diavolo's reputation. They had no idea they were being lured here, the fools," Mephisto scoffs with a smirk.

"Even so, if you'd only told us this in advance-" Raphael notices Simeon who hasn't been talking for a while now. "...Um, Simeon?"

Simeon smiles. It was that frightening smile back when he used to scold the brothers. "Ah. I see... Thank you for making things so very clear." Everyone except Moin pales at the sight. She knew that Simeon would never direct his anger towards her. "For the sake of argument, I'll overlook the fact that you chose to test Moin's powers. Because I can see how that might be the only way to draw out certain aspects of these powers. Tell me though, why was it necessary to lure the Demon King's enemies into attacking us? What if Moin or Raphael had been hurt? What would you have done then, hmm?"

"It's only thanks to Moin that we're okay. Because she protected us, even though it meant putting herself in harm's way," Raphael added in.

"What's more, I'm a human now: weak and frail. Should I assume none of you cared about what might happen to me?" -Simeon

"I wouldn't call you "weak and frail"..." Lucifer mutters.

"Sorry, did you just say something, Lucifer?" Simeon pointedly smiles at him, daring to continue what he has to say.

"No, nothing."

"I didn't know it was possible to project so much anger while maintaining a smile..." Mephisto whispered to Diavolo as he takes a step closer to him.

"I'm too scared to move a muscle. It's been a long time since anyone's made me feel this way..." -Diavolo

Moin turns to Diavolo with an expressionless gaze. "I'd like you to avoid such methods in the future..., Lord Diavolo." His face immediately shifts to the one who's worried and hurt genuinely, sensing that Moin is indeed mad and felt betrayed at this whole discussion they were having. It's spiraling down rapidly that Diavolo almost forgot to consider her feelings and wanted to comfort her. But as he was about to speak his reassurances once again and offers his hand, Mephisto butts in with a disdainful remark.

"Well, I'd like it if you could learn to control your powers. Then we wouldn't be in this situation."

Something snapped in unison. There was a moment of defeaning silence, as if another wrong answer would cause an explosion, figuratively. Simeon could tell that it was the last straw. The revelation hurt her than they thought it would. And there was another person who wasn't helping the situation get any better. He could feel the gears of emotion running around her head and that she's barely holding to what she might impulsively do: tears, anger, or running away. She really wanted to do those three options but before she could react, Simeon shields Moin from them, hiding her behind his cloak.

"...Lucifer, Diavolo, Mephisto. You need to think about what you've done today."

[odditycircus-2002]

Medusa!Reader and Shang Tsung MK 1: Part 5

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Spoilers for Story Mode: Proceed with Caution

The Imperial soldiers aren’t too gentle when they throw you into a cell; luckily, Johnny Cage’s unconscious form broke your fall. You were still blindfolded and tied up, yet you quickly picked up Baraka’s familiar grave voice. He asks what happened as he removes your gag, but you stop him from removing your blindfold by putting a hand over his. You first explain that you lost your mask, so it’s not a good idea for him to remove the blindfold yet. Then you recall what happened upstairs, although Kenshi is the one who reveals it was Mileena being treated for Tarkat. You hiss at Kenshi for disclosing such sensitive information casually. He’s lucky he’s already injured, else you’d give him a good reason to see a healer!

While understandably upset by you withholding the truth, the Tarkatan can’t find it in himself to be mad at you. You were only upholding your vows and doing your duty diligently for the Royal House.

Baraka then asks about your welfare, carefully skimming his hands over your form to check for injuries. You reply that you’re okay before asking Baraka to close his eyes so you can check over him, too. The latter insists it’s some scrapes and bruises, so there's nothing to care for; nonetheless, he complies with your request when you press. After preliminary checking on Baraka, your hands lingering around his face longer than necessary, you look over Kenshi.

However, there wasn’t much you could do for the now blind man since your apothecary bag was confiscated besides using your minimal magic to stop the bleeding. There wasn’t anything else you could do for the others besides wait for them to come to; you were able to turn your attention to the horrors right outside your prison.

You have treated soldiers during your training on the front lines without falter. You have carved open your fair share of cadavers without so much as flinching while digging around in their insides for medical studies. You had even helped dispose of your fair share of cadavers by gathering them to be burned in a pit without issue. Yet what you saw before you trumps all of that and more.

The first thing to hit you was the smell, by the gods' awful smell of death, both new and old. Which mixed with a sickly sweet smell reminiscent of mildew. It was intensified for you since you and your snakes could TASTE it on your tongues. You gagged as it threatened to be the only thing you’ll ever taste again. Then the sounds you’d only ever expect to hear from the Netherealm’s damned souls languishing in eternal torment.

Empty cages hang from the ceiling, with cells lining the walls on your side. You could see arms poking out from between the bars of these cells, desperately trying to scrape for the bloody remains all over the stone floors, which were stained with freshly spilled and hardened blood. From the position of your cell, you could see giant tubes filled with a mysterious green substance and malformed bodies obviously inflected with Tarkat. You felt bile rise in your throat from the dread filling your stomach.

You... you recognize some of the experiments from your mind. All those times you shared your theories and hypotheses with Shang Tsung... Is this all because of what you put into his head??? No! You always, ALWAYS, explicitly expressed how they would be crimes against nature! You did not create such depravity with your hands! Yet, it did nothing to alleviate the guilt already burrowing into your head.

Still, the amount of information that must've been gathered from these- NO! NO! You will not even indulge in such dark thoughts! Shang Tsung has twisted your research beyond recognition of their original intention! This whole lab shouldn't existed! After putting your blindfold back on, you desperately get to work to assist Baraka in breaking out of your prison in more ways than one.

Despite hours of effort, the bars were too thick and deeply embedded in the stone to rip apart. Kenshi eventually speaks again, asking you and Baraka to help take his mind off their current situation. You listen to the ill man retell his life before his disease, about his family and former vocation. Though you have heard it many times before, your heart broke for Baraka when he reiterated how Tarkat took his entire family. Not for the first time, you say that you would've loved to have met Baraka before his misfortune, met his family since they sound so lovely, and seen him happy. You then add how you two would've been good friends even then.

You don't see Baraka's thoughtful expression as both Johnny Cage and Kung Lao begin to regain consciousness. The first quickly remembers Kenshi's condition and rushes to check on his state. You explain to the actor that you did your best, but your apothecary bag was confiscated. Johnny and Kung Lao had understandable reactions when they realized the nightmare they'd woken up in. All your attention then turns to a lone figure entering through a heavy sliding door.

You let out a gasp as you recognize the figure to be none other than Syzoth, Shang Tsung's "assistant." You call out to him, catching the Zaterran's attention. Judging by how his eyes widened and he took a step back, he wasn't expecting you, of all people, to be down here.

The Zaterran avoids looking in your direction out of guilt; even if it was safe to make eye contact, he wouldn't be able to look you in the eye. He then turns his attention to the now blind Kenshi crouched on the stone floor and inquires about his condition. Syzoth then digs around in your apothecary bag next to your cell to pull out a jar of cream you made to dull the pain. He then hands the pot to you first, asking if this is correct. After opening it to give it a sniff, you confirmed he was right before handing it over to Johnny. Johnny offers you a pair of his shades to pay you back, citing you'll need to see. While the latter cared for his friend, you could feel Baraka's questioning gaze.

After commenting on how Syzoth is vile to be a part of Shang's schemes, he questions how you two know each other. You explain that you thought Syzoth was a lab assistant Shang brought along and a friend, the last part you add bitterly. The Zatteran looks at you and the rest in remorse before firmly stating that while you are Shang's prisoners, he is his slave. Your eyes widen behind your new sunglasses as Syzoth explains that the Sorcerer has his family hostage. While he's genuinely sorry for what Shang did to you and everything he was forced to do, he must obey Shang to keep his family alive. You felt conflicted in your sudden urge to strangle Syzoth and your sympathy for his plight. It does dawn on you that having his family hostage explains Syzoth's behavior around Shang Tsung. You weren't surprised to learn that Shang learned shapeshifting from Syzoth, as the latter has demonstrated the ability to you before.

However, you did try to warn Syzoth that, given what you know by now, Shang won't keep his word to him. Baraka assures you that you don't need to show your form if you don't feel comfortable, but you insist otherwise. That's when you removed your hood and cloak from your form to reveal the true extent of what Shang Tsung has done to you, reminding him of the day your life changed forever. The Zaterran barely swallowed his gasp in horror at the sight before him. Your entire body was covered in scales; you had a nest of living and slithering snakes atop your head; your teeth were sharpened points; you had some small spikes on your shoulders and on your forearm; you also had two bat-like wings reminiscent of a Vaternian's, flare from your back.

Shang teleports in front of you not long after revealing your new body. He glances in your direction briefly, taking in your changes with a look of interest. Baraka growls at the Sorcerer before moving in front of you as you put your hooded cloak back on. Shang scowls at the Tarkatan before happily informing the rest of your fellow prisoners of the gruesome fate that awaits them. He directly addresses you after boasting about how he can't be apprehended so easily.

"I truly did want to spare you of your fate, my sweet. Rest assured, my benefactor has told me you are still needed alive for her goals. I will be back soon, dear Y/N."

"... I hope the Netherrealm claims your soul."

After instructing Syzoth to "take care" of you, he teleports away, leaving the rest to their doom. After you and Baraka implore Syzoth that he doesn't have to obey Shang, the Zaterran glances toward you before restating that it's either you or his wife and son. When he raises your cell's gate and a cell containing dozens of Tarkatan abominations, all of you fight back. You finally put your petrifying gaze to use in combat, stopping three combinations in mid-pounce before they could pile on top of Baraka. Kung Lao watches in a mixture of horror and amazement when the three stone hybrids shatter to the ground.

After Baraka defeated some of the larger hybrids, you and Kung Lao assisted him in freeing the others who were put in electrified cells, much to Syzoth's dismay, who knew that Shang Tsung would torture his family to punish him. Before Baraka shifts his stance to fight the Zaterran, you tell him not to blame him for Shang's evil doings. Baraka acquises by not killing Syzoth, informing him that he would've done the same if he were in the Zaterran's shoes.

You go to help up your scaley friend right when Shang reappears. The Sorcerer scowled, displeased at seeing his prisoners free and his experiments killed. You and the rest stood ready to fight as Shang berated Syzoth for ruining his plans for vivisection. Seeing he's surrounded, Shang then uses his magic to release what you instantly recognize as poisonous gas. After revealing that he's killed Syzoth's family long before, Shang teleports away before the enraged reptiloid can grab him.

However, the Sorcerer quickly appears behind you, forcing your mask on your face before you bite him. However, one of your head's snakes managed to nick him on the finger. The last thing you hear before teleporting away is Baraka screaming your name.

[m---a---x]

Welcome to the premier of One-Picture-Proof!

This is either going to be the first installment of a long running series or something I will never do again. (We'll see, don't know yet.)

Like the name suggests each iteration will showcase a theorem with its proof, all in one picture. I will provide preliminaries and definitions, as well as some execises so you can test your understanding. (Answers will be provided below the break.)

The goal is to ease people with some basic knowledge in mathematics into set theory, and its categorical approach specifically. While many of the theorems in this series will apply to topos theory in general, our main interest will be the topos Set. I will assume you are aware of the notations of commutative diagrams and some terminology. You will find each post to be very information dense, don't feel discouraged if you need some time on each diagram. When you have internalized everything mentioned in this post you have completed weeks worth of study from a variety of undergrad and grad courses. Try to work through the proof arrow by arrow, try out specific examples and it will become clear in retrospect.

Please feel free to submit your solutions and ask questions, I will try to clear up missunderstandings and it will help me designing further illustrations. (Of course you can just cheat, but where's the fun in that. Noone's here to judge you!)

Preliminaries and Definitions:

B^A is the exponential object, which contains all morphisms A→B. I comes equipped with the morphism eval. : A×(B^A)→B which can be thought of as evaluating an input-morphism pair (a,f)↦f(a).

The natural isomorphism curry sends a morphism X×A→B to the morphism X→B^A that partially evaluates it. (1×A≃A)

φ is just some morphism A→B^A.

Δ is the diagonal, which maps a↦(a,a).

1 is the terminal object, you can think of it as a single-point set.

We will start out with some introductory theorem, which many of you may already be familiar with. Here it is again, so you don't have to scroll all the way up:

Exercises:

What is the statement of the theorem?

Work through the proof, follow the arrows in the diagram, understand how it is composed.

What is the more popular name for this technique?

What are some applications of it? Work through those corollaries in the diagram.

Can the theorem be modified for epimorphisms? Why or why not?

For the advanced: What is the precise requirement on the category, such that we can perform this proof?

For the advanced: Can you alter the proof to lessen this requirement?

Bonus question: Can you see the Sicko face? Can you unsee it now?

Expand to see the solutions:

Solutions:

This is Lawvere's Fixed-Point Theorem. It states that, if there is a point-surjective morphism φ:A→B^A, then every endomorphism on B has a fixed point.

Good job! Nothing else to say here.

This is most commonly known as diagonalization, though many corollaries carry their own name. Usually it is stated in its contraposition: Given a fixed-point-less endomorphism on B there is no surjective morphism A→B^A.

Most famous is certainly Cantor's Diagonalization, which introduced the technique and founded the field of set theory. For this we work in the category of sets where morphisms are functions. Let A=ℕ and B=2={0,1}. Now the function 2→2, 0↦1, 1↦0 witnesses that there can not be a surjection ℕ→2^ℕ, and thus there is more than one infinite cardinal. Similarly it is also the prototypiacal proof of incompletness arguments, such as Gödels Incompleteness Theorem when applied to a Gödel-numbering, the Halting Problem when we enumerate all programs (more generally Rice's Theorem), Russells Paradox, the Liar Paradox and Tarski's Non-Defineability of Truth when we enumerate definable formulas or Curry's Paradox which shows lambda calculus is incompatible with the implication symbol (minimal logic) as well as many many more. As in the proof for Curry's Paradox it can be used to construct a fixed-point combinator. It also is the basis for forcing but this will be discussed in detail at a later date.

If we were to replace point-surjective with epimorphism the theorem would no longer hold for general categories. (Of course in Set the epimorphisms are exactly the surjective functions.) The standard counterexample is somewhat technical and uses an epimorphism ℕ→S^ℕ in the category of compactly generated Hausdorff spaces. This either made it very obvious to you or not at all. Either way, don't linger on this for too long. (Maybe in future installments we will talk about Polish spaces, then you may want to look at this again.) If you really want to you can read more in the nLab page mentioned below.

This proof requires our category to be cartesian closed. This means that it has all finite products and gives us some "meta knowledge", called closed monoidal structure, to work with exponentials.

Yanofsky's theorem is a slight generalization. It combines our proof steps where we use the closed monoidal structure such that we only use finite products by pre-evaluating everything. But this in turn requires us to introduce a corresponding technicallity to the statement of the theorem which makes working with it much more cumbersome. So it is worth keeping in the back of your mind that it exists, but usually you want to be working with Lawvere's version.

Yes you can. No, you will never be able to look at this diagram the same way again.

We see that Lawvere's Theorem forms the foundation of foundational mathematics and logic, appears everywhere and is (imo) its most important theorem. Hence why I thought it a good pick to kick of this series.

If you want to read more, the nLab page expands on some of the only tangentially mentioned topics, but in my opinion this suprisingly beginner friendly paper by Yanofsky is the best way to read about the topic.

[mbti-notes]

Funny story, the other day I received a question about the quotation "Until you make the unconscious conscious, it will direct your life and you will call it fate". (Sorry to the person who asked because I lost track of your handle and must now post the full response here. You're about to see the journey you've sent me on.) The question was vaguely worded, so I can only assume it was requesting a source for the quotation. This struck me as odd for a couple reasons. First, the quotation is widely attributed to Jung, so it shouldn't be very difficult to find the source. When I say "widely", I mean it is not only used all over the internet, it also appears in numerous books. Second, the quotation does a great job of encapsulating a central tenet of Jung's theory, so there is nothing particularly strange or suspicious about it.

Since I'm used to academic writing and wading through research materials, I'm usually diligent about finding the original source of quotations in order to avoid misattributions. But I was lax in this case because I allowed myself to assume that such a well-known quotation must have already been checked by someone. A mistake. A preliminary search revealed that a small handful of people have doubted the attribution, but a definitive answer seemed elusive. So, I decided to take a deep dive into the literature. I searched through Jung's as well as whatever Jung-adjacent and Jung-inspired works I could get my hands on.

I was unable to find a verbatim source in Jung's own writing. However, this isn't enough for me to claim that he never said it. It's possible that it was lifted from a discussion, lecture, or interview, of which the transcripts are not readily available. Jung did write sentences that were remarkably similar to the quotation in meaning, so it's also possible that the quotation was somehow mangled or lost in translation from the original language, which makes it difficult to match up with the official English editions of his work.

I then decided to locate its earliest usage in order to piece together an origin story. The earliest date I could find was ~2006, which is a huge red flag. Books by Jung and about Jung span the entire last century, so one would expect at least a few references from earlier periods, especially throughout the 90s when psychoanalytic theory was widely referenced in a variety of academic disciplines. Of course, books before the 90s haven't all been indexed and made available to search online, so a citation might still exist out there somewhere in a very obscure book.

I then decided to examine books published since 2006 that contained the quotation to see if any included a citation. This was even more of a red flag because, in every case, the authors either did not provide a citation, cited another post-2006 book, or cited a (dubious) internet resource. It turns out that 2006 might be an important piece of the puzzle because it was around then that goodreads.com went online and became a widely used resource for quotations.

Although goodreads makes it clear that they don't verify information, people often trust the website because it is assumed that readers are quoting accurately as they read the actual books. The Jung quotation in question is listed on their website and could even be the first instance, but there was no citation and I couldn't find who originally posted it in order to ask where they got it from. Whoever originally posted it was obviously familiar enough with Jungian theory to capture some of its essence.

In conclusion, I hazard to guess that there are three main possibilities for how this quotation came into being. Around the mid 2000s, someone reading something in the original language posted their own personal translation of it, or they got it from an obscure source, or they fabricated it for reasons unknown. From there, the quotation got picked up by various parties and spread far and wide.

I decided to tell this story because I think it's a good example of how misinformation creeps around online and gradually becomes "reality". The numerous steps I had to go through to investigate this one tiny piece of information illustrates how tedious it can be to verify the things you read. Should we expect the masses to verify every word they come across? It's not realistic, is it? Teachers and parents tell kids to be careful about the internet content they consume, to not take things at face value, to not believe everything they see and hear, etc. But it isn't easy (or fun) to always be on alert even for the motivated, even for this weary and grizzled researcher.

Fortunately, nobody's gonna die from a misattributed quote. But, what about subjects of consequence such as medicine or geopolitics where truth really matters? I love that we have so much information at our fingertips. I just wish we didn't always have to battle against greed and chaos to find the good stuff.

[reachartwork]

Initial Contact + 47 Days

Following the Chicago Incident and subsequent plasma column formations over Madrid and Seoul, our analysis team has compiled preliminary findings regarding the series of apparent atmospheric entry attempts by unidentified objects, designated UXO-1 through UXO-7. These incidents demonstrate a clear pattern of iterative refinement that suggests deliberate testing rather than random failures.

The first object, UXO-1, was detected entering the atmosphere over the Pacific Ocean at 0247 GMT on June 12th. Initial radar returns suggested a conventional craft approximately 3 meters in length. Upon reaching an altitude of 31,000 meters, the object experienced catastrophic structural failure. What followed defies conventional physics.

The volume of debris recovered exceeds the original size of the object by a factor of approximately 230. Analysis of the recovered components reveals sophisticated mechanical systems of impossible density and miniaturization. A single recovered gear assembly, measuring 4cm in diameter, contained internal mechanical structures that would occupy roughly 8 cubic meters if conventionally arranged. When the research team attempted to map the internal geometry of these components, measuring tools produced contradictory results, with internal measurements failing to correlate with external dimensions.

More disturbing was the discovery that many of the mechanical components continued to function after impact, despite severe damage. Dr. Harrison's team documented what appeared to be computational processes being carried out through purely mechanical means, with no electronic components detected. The complexity of these systems suggests computational capability far exceeding what should be possible through mechanical means alone.

Each subsequent entry attempt has penetrated approximately 2-3km deeper into the atmosphere before failure. UXO-7, the most recent attempt, managed to reach an altitude of 17,000 meters before destabilizing. The volume of debris recovered from each incident has decreased, suggesting progressive refinement of whatever technology allows these objects to contain apparently impossible internal volumes.

Microscopic analysis of recovered components shows precision engineering at scales approaching theoretical limits. Dr. Chen's team has identified what appear to be mechanical memory storage systems that operate through principles we cannot yet explain. Attempts to reverse engineer these systems have been hampered by their tendency to catastrophically decompress when examined too closely, often resulting in explosive expansion of internal components.

Most concerning are the patterns emerging in the distribution and timing of these attempts. Each entry vector has been precisely calculated to minimize potential civilian casualties from debris, despite the seemingly destructive nature of the failures. This suggests either remarkable predictive capability or a level of control maintained even during catastrophic failure.

The working theory, supported by analysis of debris patterns and recovered components, is that these objects employ some form of spatial manipulation technology that becomes catastrophically unstable in Earth's atmosphere. The same technology appears responsible for the plasma column formations, though the exact mechanism remains unclear. Each iteration shows signs of attempted adaptation to our atmosphere, though the fundamental incompatibility appears difficult to overcome.

We strongly recommend treating future atmospheric entry attempts as potential hazards requiring immediate response, while noting that the pattern suggests these may be attempts at establishing contact rather than direct hostile action. The precision of the entry vectors and apparent care taken to minimize collateral damage, even during catastrophic failures, implies a level of consideration that seems at odds with overtly hostile intent.

Additional funding is urgently needed for contained testing facilities. The volume of mechanical components recovered from these incidents now occupies three dedicated warehouses, and we have barely begun to understand their operational principles. Of particular concern is the possibility that these objects represent scouting attempts for a larger incursion, though the apparent difficulty these entities have with atmospheric entry provides some strategic advantage for planetary defense considerations.

Attached are detailed analyses of debris patterns, component reconstruction attempts, and preliminary theories regarding the spatial manipulation technology involved. We cannot overstate the potential implications of successfully understanding and replicating this technology, nor the urgency of preparing for further contact attempts.

-- Dr. Sarah Reeves Lead Investigator, Department of Defense Extrasolar Technology Assessment Team

[canonmisogynyvictimstournament]

PRELIMINARY ROUND - STAR TREK

PROPAGANDA

T'Pol

1.) dressed as a sex object. far more qualified & experienced than the (male) captain yet treated as less capable. had her agency removed when her past rape was revealed against her wishes & the episode treated it as a good thing. her taking command of the ship got humanity wiped out in an alternate timeline & she "redeemed herself" by becoming a housewife. there was a scene where the captain fell face first into her boobs. whatever they paid her actress, it should have been at least 3x more

2.) i think you can most clearly see the misogyny t'pol deals with in her costuming and makeup. she is given clear special treatment to make her look "more attractive": she wears catsuits throughout the show (despite neither institution she works for having any other similar uniforms, even for other women), sexy little silk pajamas, a cropped jumpsuit one time (even tho…it's a one piece?? and makes no sense to be cropped????), and SFX makeup that doesnt make her look as "alien" as other members of the literal alien species she's a part of. enterprise's main crime is sexualization, and while everyone (quite literally EVERY member of the cast) is hit with it at least once, t'pol pretty much never gets a break. there's a difference between sexy and overly sexualized, and ent is FAR into the over sexualized side of that spectrum. love you t'pol wish your canon was better xoxo

3.) The classic “Rick Berman Star Trek needs a woman who is strong and competent and part of the crew but gets skintight jumpsuits with low necklines instead of standard issue Starfleet uniforms to show cleavage and keep the male audience on board”.

Kes

1.) Poor Kes had it so bad. She's an Ocampan, which is a kind of alien with psychic powers and a 9-year long life-span. I was pretty interested in what they were going to do with her character when I started watching because in theory with the show having seven seasons, we could have seen her go through pretty much her whole life span over the course of the show. Unfortunately, most of her character is tied up in her terrible boyfriend Neelix, who is at a lower estimate in his mid 30s, and at an upper estimate his mid 50. He met her and started dating her while she was taken prisoner after being kidnapped. Neelix is mostly meant to be comic relief, he acts like an annoying, forcefully cheerful clown for the majority of his time on-screen (when he's not having war flashbacks) except for when he's interacting with Kes. With Kes he is possessive, controlling and manipulative. He's constantly accusing her of trying to cheat on him or leave him, throwing himself pity parties whenever she talks to another man and belittling her. And worst of all he's often framed as being in the right. She hardly gets any screen-time that isn't somehow actually about her boyfriend, the Doctor she's the assistant of or another male crew member who has a crush on her (also too old for her). When she does it's pretty much always focused on her psychic powers and not her as a person.

Some of the highlights of her time on the show include the time that Neelix's lungs were stolen, and after he spends the whole episode feeling sorry for himself and accusing her of being happy about it because he thinks she wants to leave him she donates him one of her lungs. Then there's the time some space anomaly makes her prematurely fertile so she has to decide if she ever wants kids right at that moment, and for some reason, almost the whole episode is focused on whether Neelix wants kids. She eventually breaks up with Neelix. Which is great! But she was possessed at the time. So she didn't even get to do that herself.

She was written off the show at the start of season 4 when another character was added and they needed to boot someone. She "ascends to a higher plane of existence". And then everyone on the crew proceeds to completely forget her about her straight afterwards. I'm not sure anyone was actually sad about her essentially dying. She comes back in a later episode called "Fury" which is about her trying to take revenge on the crew for her poor treatment. You'd think this would be good. But for some reason, she's mostly angry at the captain for allowing her to get on the ship in the first place, despite one of her few character traits being that she's adventurous and always wanting to learn things that no one else has. So the episode mostly focuses on trying to pick apart one of the only parts of her character that was well-defined and consistent. Her past self does tell her that she's forgotten what she truly wanted or something to talk her out of her revenge plan. I'm not really sure what they were going for. She tells the captain she was only an innocent child, so she shouldn't have been allowed to make the decision to get on the ship. She is never shown to be angry at Neelix. The man who started dating her when she was according to her future self a child. And a prisoner.

2.) She's kind of the sexy born yesterday character who's already taken. She's an alien whose race only lives nine years, so when i say that she got married at two that's a bit less alarming. She lived underground her "whole" life (about a year and a half) before she left her town, to find the surface, got kidnapped and then rescued by Neelix, a middle-aged scavenger/smuggler/chef who looks like a Cats character from a regular aging alien race. Neelix promises to show her new places and they apparently fall in love and get married and then Neelix takes her to the Voyager, and she leaves her home forever. At the age of 2. She lived in a cave her whole life, then found this gross little man, married him for some reason, and then was convinced to leave everything she had ever known, her entire family and life, to get on a star ship whose express mission was getting to the other side of the universe as fast as they were able.

Once on the ship she was able to find some independence and her own interests, and eventually left neelix, but god their entire relationship was really just loser old man and naive teenager and it was soooooooo uncomfortable

3.) I rewatched the Kes parts of Voyager. The "General Observations" section can be taken as a TL;DR (sorry for the essay). Here are a few not-so-fun facts about Kes:

General Observations:

Kes was kidnapped 4 times over the course of the show.

Kes often talks like a child especially early on in the show. She acts like a classic Disney Princess; sweet, but not quite understanding what's going on around her.

A lot of Kes's character revolves around the fact that she is very young, and a lot of the more uncomfortable aspects of her treatment revolve around this too. It's not like it's an impossible concept to pull off, in the same show the EMH is actually younger than Kes, and has several romantic relationships that don't feel super creepy in the same way most of Kes's do. This is because the writers don't make him act like a child and they actually give him agency in his relationships.

Kes's people, the Ocampa, live underground on a desert planet. Kes travelled to the surface when she was less than 1 year old, where she was captured by the people living there and tortured for information using "every method of persuasion" that they know. This is where she met and started dating Neelix. He explicitly says he thinks she is dating him because she owes him for getting her out of that situation, and yet it seems like the writers think this is a cute and heartwarming relationship.

Nearly all of her screen time is devoted to emotionally counseling the men around her, helping their character development, comforting and caring for them. She is hardly ever shown to have negative emotions ("Fury" aside), and then it's generally only when a man she cares about is in trouble. This includes when she is kidnapped. Even then she has to be calm, understanding and empathetic.

Kes's established character traits: curious, smart, psychic, caring, kind, young, innocent, naive. Pretty much all of these get tossed out the window in "Fury". She kills people she's known most of her life and tries to sell everyone out to organ harvesters because she gets "confused". She decides not to do this in the end because her younger self tells her she's acting out of character. This episode is one of the worst instances of character assassination I have ever seen.

In about 10 of her 70 total episodes on the show Kes makes a significant contribution to the plot that is not focused on a man. Most of those were more her acting as a psychic plot device rather than anything about her as an actual character. There was only one episode "Before and After", which I would count as truly being devoted to Kes as a character.

Practically every man Kes comes across is attracted to her. Often her attractiveness is mentioned in the same breath as the fact that she is literally a 1-3 year old.

Kes's love interests: Neelix, the EMH, Tom Paris, Tuvix, Ameron (while possessed), Nori (while possessed), Zahir. Aside from Zahir, she has pretty much no agency in any of these relationships.

Neelix calls Kes "sweetie", and talks to her like she's a child. When he's not shouting at her, anyway. Kes unconditionally loves and adores him for some reason.

Observations while watching:

When Neelix's lungs are stolen Kes refuses to leave his side and one of the first things she does is offer to donate one of her own, refuses to let the EMH perform any medical procedures until she's sure it's safe. Meanwhile, Neelix goes on a jealous rant at her because she called another man by his first name.

When Kes donates a lung Neelix refuses at first because the operation would be too dangerous, but Kes says "you've done so much for me, let me give you something once", implying that Kes owes him a lung for him helping free her from the people torturing her.

The episode "Elogium" was apparently meant to be a metaphor for teen pregnancy. With Kes as the teen and Neelix (whose actor says that he sees him as being in his 50s) as the father.

Ocampan puberty apparently happens between the ages of 4 and 5. Kes starts the series at less than 1 year old, and leaves at 3. She is apparently at an age where it would be dangerous to conceive a child in "Elogium". She is not sure she is finished growing. She has been dating Neelix for about a year (possibly more) at this point.

When the EMH hallucinates Kes as his wife, she makes him promise not to tell Neelix, because he tends to get "a little jealous"

In "Elogium", Neelix interrogates Kes over the fact that Tom Paris says "see you later" to her because he "Sees the way he looks at (her). (He) used to look at women that way (he) knows what it means." Neelix is later implied to be in the right here, Kes is being naive thinking Tom Paris could be her friend, apparently.

In "Twisted" Kes turns two years old. Tom Paris gives her a locket for her birthday. Neelix gets pissed off because he thinks he's trying to charm her. Neelix is, again framed as being in the right here.

Kes has a very good memory and is able to remember where everyone's rooms are. When she demonstrates this, Neelix implies she knows this because she's slept with every man on the ship. At the end of this episode, Kes decides to put his photo in her locket to always keep him close.

When Kes is upset that Neelix attacked Tom Paris over her, the EMH tells her she should consider herself lucky to have two men fighting over her.

Tom Paris admits to Neelix that he finds Kes attractive, but says that he won't try anything with her because he respects Neelix. He asks if Neelix would allow him to be her friend. Because who cares what Kes wants right? I guess if Neelix had said no he would have just stopped talking to her?

Tom says Kes is very devoted to Neelix, and Neelix admits he thinks she's only with him because he saved her life and she's grateful he freed her from captivity and she owes him. He is dating her despite this. This is never addressed.

Tanis, another Ocampan, calls her innocent and naive, so she seems quite young even by the standards of her own species.

Tuvix, having inherited Neelix's manipulative tendencies tries to manipulate Kes into begging the captain for his life.

Kes gets kidnapped by caveman aliens. When someone comes to rescue her, the cavemen try to trade another woman to them so they can keep Kes.

Kes goes into a coma and acts as the damsel in distress again in "Sacred Ground"

"This is typical of you Neelix… it bothers you that I'm making friends of my own, you always have to involve yourself somehow." "You can spend time with anyone you want" "As long as I spend most of it with you… I never realised a relationship could be any different. I've never been with anyone but you." Kes when she breaks up with Neelix. Except this isn't Kes because she's actually possessed at the time. She doesn't even get agency in her own breakup.

Kes is dressed in skintight leather trousers and high heels and tries to seduce everyone while possessed by a male warlord. He describes Kes as a "little girl".

In "Darkling" Kes starts wearing form fitting jumpsuits somewhat similar to the ones Seven of Nine wears (though not quite as tight). This is possibly because she's supposed to look more mature, and she starts having "young adult" storylines instead of teenager storylines.

"Everyone seems to be treating me like a child, I'm three years old now"

The EMH kidnaps Kes in "Darkling" when he turns temporarily evil. His treatment of her in this episode includes shoving her into a wall and putting his hand around her neck, repeatedly grabbing and shoving her, holding her at gunpoint and throwing her off a cliff.

The evil EMH kidnaps Kes because she wants to leave the ship to travel with her new boyfriend. This is framed as the good inside of him because he is trying to "protect" her. Kes decides to stay on the ship because of this. She never expresses any negative emotions about this incident.

In "Before and After" Kes goes through her entire life in reverse. In the future she sees, she has married Tom Paris and had a daughter with him, and her daughter has a child with Harry Kim, who was the best man at Kes and Tom's wedding. This is by far the best Kes episode, but she never really gets to react to anything that happens in it. Soon after this she ascends to a higher plane of existence in "The Gift".

In "Before and After" Kes sees threats in advance and warns the crew about them, preventing the Captain's death in the future. This isn't really acknowledged.

Half of "The Gift" is focused on Seven of Nine and the Borg. Not even Kes's send-off episode is really focused on her.

In "The Gift", Neelix and Kes have one final scene together. Neelix gets quite self-pitying again and says she broke up with him because he was holding her back. Kes says that wasn't it but doesn't say why it happened. This is the only time they directly talk about their breakup outside of when Kes was possessed.

When Kes decides to ascend, the captain begs her to reconsider. Kes insists she has not lost her judgement or come under an alien influence. Captain Janeway tells her she's family and tearfully embraces her. Tuvok puts out a candle in mourning (everyone forgets about her after this episode ends though).

In "Fury" Kes is back in physical form somehow, despite ascending into some higher plane of existence in the last episode she appeared. She is also much older in appearance.

In "Fury" Kes gets onto the ship, starts exploding everything she can with her psychic powers, kills everyone she comes across and goes back in time to the start of the show to kidnap herself.

Kes and Neelix have a scene in "Fury". It makes Neelix much nicer than he ever was in the early parts of the show (especially to Kes). He actually notices something is wrong and asks her how she is and prepares her favourite meal for her because she had a bad day. I'm not sure he ever even asked her how she was before. I guess at this point they must have wanted to pretend the relationship was a lot less creepy and unhealthy than it actually was. Especially since Kes is the villain of the episode.

Older Kes's plan in "Fury" is to travel back in time, sell out the people she spent the majority of her life with to organ harvesters so she can send her and her younger self back to her home world because the crew "abandoned her a long time ago". I think this manages to dismantle practically every established character trait she has.

Older Kes's explanation of her actions in "Fury": "You (Captain Janeway) took her (young Kes) from Ocampa. Her home. She's a prisoner on this ship. I was a child, you corrupted me. Your ideas. Exploration, discovery. I believed you. In three years I'm going to leave Voyager in search of higher things because you encouraged me to do it. You encouraged me to develop my mental abilities. What I found, I couldn't control it, it scared me… I trusted you!" Neelix was the one who took her from Ocampa. As noted before, Captain Janeway begged her not to ascend.

Old Kes is killed by the captain. They know something terrible happened to Kes when she ascended, but apparently all that they did was get Kes to record a video of herself saying that she shouldn't take revenge because it's not who she is. This worked for some reason, she says she killed everyone because she was confused.

Kes decides to go back to Ocampa. Due to the Ocampan lifespan, everyone she knew before she left is probably dead. To add insult to injury, Neelix is the last person she sees before she leaves for good.

[garmgeyr]

CHARACTERIZATION UPDATE & THEORIES

UPDATED 12/13/24

Now that Penacony’s story has officially concluded, I’ve combed through the script to compile all of Gallagher’s dialogue in a doc that I can use and continue to add onto as a reference (as of right now, it only has dialogue and my preliminary annotations, but since this is a character who is simultaneously an unreliable narrator and a figure deeply tied to Penacony’s history, I intend to supplement it with links to evidence from other sources as I revisit the Penacony readables and NPCs). In light of the information presented in 2.3, I’m updating my portrayal here in GH as well.

The information below will be full of major spoilers from 2.2, so proceed at your own risk.

First of all, who - or what - is Gallagher?

Gallagher is an emanator of Enigmata, and is himself a work of fiction (within the fiction that is HSR). The philosophy of Enigmata asserts that the singular truth in this world is that nothing can truly be known, and that certainty (i.e. Fate, Destiny, the past repeating itself) stagnates life. As a “virtual character,” Gallagher’s existence is a lie and will end once this is revealed, which we can assume is one of the rules emanators of Enigmata must follow in order to continue enjoying their aeon’s blessings. This is a fascinating concept and part of Gallagher’s appeal to me, and were it not for the fact I’ve chosen to pick him up in a RP group, I’d leave it at that. But RP does demand a certain degree of certainty about a character, so my goal is not to undermine this concept with “truth,” but to establish a foundation for my writing.

To distill his character, I’ve separated canon information provided by the main story into “Verified By Another Source” and “Accepted As True Until Proven False.” Most of the information in the first category has been verified by Micah, Mikhail’s memory, and the Dreamjoy Memoir event, all of which we have to assume are trustworthy sources, while most information in the second category has been provided by Gallagher himself, who has a history of lying to the player characters without them - or the audience - being aware.

Verified By Another Source

Gallagher is a History Fictionologist, an emanator of Enigmata

He’s been branded as a traitor by the Family, along with Mikhail and Micah, and has a deep-seated distrust toward the Family

He’s existed as “Gallagher” in Penacony at least since the Age of Dreaming, which was several Amber Eras ago, and assisted Mikhail in developing the Watchmaker facade to lure visitors from all across the cosmos to the Planet of Festivities

He helped create Dreamflux Reef out of the primordial dreamscape, however, at the moment I only have concrete confirmation that he was responsible for the second time it was lifted. This was after Mikhail’s exile and it was used as a refuge for the other exiles who were fleeing the Family. Dreamflux Reef is the oldest city in the dreamscape and the place where Mikhail’s history as the Father of Penacony began, so it existed at some point prior to their exile

His appearance and parts of his character are copied from other members of the Family. According to Sunday’s suspect list, he: is laidback with a calm demeanor, is a Bloodhound security officer and also a charismatic drinksmith, slacks off on the job, has a habit of messing with his tie, smokes cigarettes, loves soda, likes to have a piece of candy before getting down to work, seems mentally older than he appears, has a stocky stature and distinguishable scars, regularly goes to the bar to drink after work, is generally unkempt and slobbish, and has a subtle sense of humor

He has the tendency to come and go quietly, and show up at just the right time

He created the memetic entity called Dormancy, which took several years of effort

He wrote the Charmony Festival invitations to bring competing factions to the Planet of Festivities and hoped that this would smoke out the true traitor in the Family

Sunday essentially “killed” Gallagher when he saw through his persona. If you watch the scene at the end of Act II, the background music quiets and a mournful bell chimes after this revelation, and then Gallagher gets pretty antsy. From outright stating that he's running out of time, to taking a more active role in the story's progression (almost to the point of pushiness), his behavior shifts quite a bit from this moment on

Accepted as True Until Proven False

Gallagher calls himself a child of the Watchmaker, similar to Micah. This tells us that Gallagher is younger than Mikhail and was "raised" by him like the other children orphaned during the War of Independence. However, we also know that there is a persona that existed before "Gallagher," and how old that persona is remains a mystery for now.

Mikhail, Micah, and the others never found out he was a “virtual character” or else he would have had to give up the persona long ago. This lends credence to the idea that he’s been known as “Gallagher” for a very long time

The features he collected from the individuals in the Family to concoct his persona were taken over time, not all at once. He's been refining his persona for years (much like one might refine their own personality in reality, hm?)

He self-identifies as a traitor to Mikhail, stating that he “did nothing” when Mikhail needed him. This seems to have been after the truth about the Family’s use of the Stellaron had been discovered (sometime after the Age of Dreaming), and Mikhail was getting pretty old. At some point, Mikhail gave Gallagher the directive to send invitations for the Charmony Festival, and then left for the frontier again (where he died and was later brought back to be enshrined in Dreamflux’s garden). If what Gallagher says about betraying Mikhail is true, then it may be that he hesitated for too long to send the invitations. Being as skeptical as he is, especially after centuries as a witness to Mikhail’s futile attempts to contact the Astral Express, I don’t think he believed that Mikhail’s idea would work, and so he and Micah (and others) tried to find a different way, to no avail. During this time, Mikhail disappeared and died out of sight

Gallagher was the only other person outside of the passengers of the Express who could see Misha, but having known Mikhail only in adulthood, he didn’t realize that this was the childhood spirit of his old friend until the Crew uncovered the secret of the dream bubble. In his About Misha II voice line, the JP version makes it more explicit that with meeting Misha, Gallagher is now a witness to the entirety of Mikhail’s life

He’s a “Virtual Character” who’s been around for a few Eras - so what does that mean?

When I first brought Gallagher into the group, my working theory was that he was created by some off-screen History Fictionologist and puppeted like one might control an avatar in a game. However, I no longer believe this to be a fitting interpretation. In the main story, Gallagher consistently calls himself the Fictionologist, and that Fictionologists cease to exist once their lie has been discovered. We don’t have any information to prove otherwise, so for now we have to simply believe him. It’s still congruent with his loading screen information and his character stories too: he fabricated this persona, which makes him both the author and the character. Firefly’s About Gallagher line seems to support this idea as well:

Learning about everything he experienced is like reading a brilliant novel. You know that the people are made up, but you still can't help but feel joy and sadness for them. Maybe by the end, we'll have long-lost track of who the author, the reader, and the characters are.

The end of 2.2 and 2.3, as well as the letter Gallagher leaves for the Trailblazer on the Express, all drive home the idea that Gallagher the character is gone now. “Life and death are merely fiction on the road to Enigmata, just like farewells and reunions.” He’s fulfilled his mission and has been uncovered as a fabrication; however, there was a persona that existed before "Gallagher," and so it's likely that there is a persona that exists after "Gallagher," too, even if it's one that needs to be remade from scratch.

The Hound statues associated with Gallagher continue to exist all throughout Penacony, and the one I think is the most interesting is the one you can find in the Scorchsand venue after 2.2. It’s sitting on a table directly across from the mysterious film that begins the Scorchsand Vacation adventure quest, which has tidbits about Gallagher’s and Dormancy’s fates, all captured by a “Mr. Reca” who, from the limited information we have about him, seems to be a Fictionologist as well. My red string theory is that this person, who still exists in the world, is linked to Gallagher.

“Even now, the world is still filled with characters that we’ve played.”

But that’s a post for another day.

Continuity in GH

Personally, I believe that Gallagher disappearing at the end of the story is poignant and stays true to the concept that he was made to convey. In any other situation, I wouldn’t try to figure out how to prove or explain how he still exists after the fact, but Gnostic Hymns requires characters to be up to date with canon, and I can’t write a current iteration of a character who doesn’t exist. As the mun who chose to pick up this tricky character for a group like this, I have to establish some way to keep him around past 2.3 in a recognizable form.

For GH’s purposes, I’m making the following assumptions:

Gallagher is not human. The “truest” part of him is likely the magenta energy that glows beneath his scars and in the eyes of the Hound statues. To keep up his human facade over the centuries though, he’s physically aged at the same rate as Micah (which means that he did indeed stop aging a while ago, since Micah’s physical body is gone now and Micah himself says that the way he appears is probably the way he looked the last time he entered the dream)

It’s through the blessing of Abundance that he has a near-immortal existence

With Enigmata being born from Remembrance, I believe that Emanators of Enigmata have similar rules and abilities as Emanators of Remembrance. In other words, both have the ability to exist as complex memetic entities that can travel wherever they want and assume the appearance of locals, as long as they’re fulfilling their aeon’s desires. Gallagher is therefore not confined to Penacony’s dreamscape

The Hound statues around Penacony are Gallagher’s avatars, through which he can observe areas where they’ve been placed. His existence in this way is more like that of a spirit

He and Dormancy are cut from the same cloth (in JP, Sunday even says this during their confrontation, instead saying that they’re merely “linked”), which is what gives him unique control over it. This seems to imply that he's more like a meme (similar to Black Swan, who can also control Dormancy to an extent) than human

So what now? In true Enigmata fashion, Gallagher simply exists in GH. He doesn’t have an explanation for it. I don’t have an explanation for it. Followers of Enigmata are said to even have trouble understanding themselves, so this still aligns with the lore. For threads that take place after 2.2, Gallagher is once more a drinksmith, although one who is found in Dreamflux more often than in the Family’s dreamscape. As far as anyone else is concerned, including those who knew him before 2.2, he’s just another dreamchaser. He’ll make no allusions to his involvement with the Astral Express or Penacony’s fate, and will be crafting a new backstory from his future interactions in GH, including those that take place in other worlds.

This doesn’t change how he’ll participate in threads outside of Penacony though. In all other instances, he’ll adopt a new persona for the purpose of the environment, although it will look and act similar to the Gallagher we know.

While I don’t believe Gallagher will make a return in future patches, I do think that there will be additional information pertinent to the path of Enigmata and History Fictionologists, so I expect to continuously update my interpretation as the game continues.

My favorite thing about Gallagher, and what I hope to keep at the core of my interpretation, is that ultimately, his presence in the story asks us to think about what we consider to be real. Can something fictional have a tangible effect on others or make a lasting impact on the world? I don’t think I have to guess what the writers of a RP group would say to that.

[captn-trex]

and so it begins…

with clone x oc week right around the corner, I thought it would be the perfect opportunity to kick off my next longfic, shadows of kamino, which includes 5 original characters, paired with 5 existing clones — Rex, Fives, Hunter, Tech and Crosshair. their stories don’t really intersect at the beginning at all and I know that 5 new characters may be a lot to get your head around so I thought I’d do a little introduction post :) complete with songs because yeah I’m a music nerd sorry

just a quick note — I won’t be posting chapters of this every week like I did (more or less) with Technical Devotion, because tbh I just don’t think that brings out great work from me lol. so I’ll just be posting as and when I write/edit chapters, and will be more active posting it at some points and less at others. the first chapter will be out tomorrow !

the basic idea is that they are all other clones that the kaminoans made at some point and for whatever reason (to be discovered during the story). the images are just ones I made up using this website, but I’ll replace them with my own art as and when I make it.

okay! so here they are (under the cut):

— Etta / Rex

"nobody said it would be easy, and if it was you wouldn't want it anyway"

The circumstances of Etta’s creation are completely unknown to her, which made it hard to explain her existence to the clones of the GAR when she was placed among them at the (accelerated) age of 7 years old. The clones were suspicious of her at first, but the squad she was placed with, domino squad, took her under their wing, even if they did originally nickname her ‘Miss’ — due to her slow progression in being able to hit the target with a blaster. Throughout training, she became a formidable warrior and an even better shot, and with her designation CT-3774, her ‘brothers’ started to call her Etta, as her numbers resembled the name. She is very earnest and intentional with her words and actions, always follows orders, but also lets loose around her close brothers. She is fiercely loyal and takes immense pride in being part of the Grand Army of the Republic.

— Indri / Fives

"slow down, you crazy child, you're so ambitious for a juvenile, but then if you're so smart, tell me why are you still so afraid?"

Indri was created just before the clones of the Grand Army of the Republic, as a preliminary test for the Kaminoans’ newer theories of accelerated aging. She does not age as fast as the other clones, but faster than the average human, and does not know anything about her donor other than the fact that they were from Alderaan. Indri works with the Kaminoan Nala Se, and assists in the process of cloning and figuring out new methods to stretch the DNA of Jango Fett further. She is not allowed to talk to the other clones, and so none of them know of her existence, apart from a small girl in a similar situation named Omega, who sometimes helps in the lab. Indri is extremely intelligent but relatively timid, though if someone asks about her work then she could talk for hours and hours.

— Minra / Hunter

"I come unhinged, and play before your pale eyes, and suck you in, to make me feel everything"

The Kaminoans created Minra for a very specific reason, though it is not fully known to her. Throughout her life on Kamino, she has been trained by a plethora of bounty hunters, teaching her how to fight, self-defence and stealth tactics. The only thing she knows about her DNA donor is that they were Pantoran, which she had to figure out by herself after realising she didn’t look like the humans she interacted with. She isn't strictly allowed to speak to the other clones, but she also isn't one to pay much attention to the rules. Minra is a relatively guarded person, and revealing her true feelings about something would be the last thing she'd do. She has been known for having a flirtatious personality, which has landed her in hot water with the Kaminoans a handful of times. She can be more self-centred than others, but her sheltered upbringing on Kamino is mainly to blame.

— Nyx / Tech

"this life lived mostly underground, unknowing either sight nor sound, 'til reaching up for sunlight just to be ripped out by the stem"

Nyx is a defective and enhanced clone, with the designation CT-9905. She was created shortly after the defective clones of Clone Force 99, though was not allowed to join them in training as she was ‘behind’ them in her development. Her enhanced skills include speed, stealth and agility, and her weapon of choice is a pair of vibroblades, only using a blaster when absolutely necessary. She knows that she was cloned from a bounty hunter, like the rest of the clones of the Grand Army of the Republic, but unlike them, she does not know who this bounty hunter was. Nyx doesn’t talk to anyone unless absolutely necessary, and is incredibly focused, intelligent and rational. She particularly dislikes the Kaminoans, as she feels they only see her as an experiment, especially when they refuse to call her by her chosen name.

— Tiyunne / Crosshair

"the fire in you is long gone, it burned too bright, like the red sun, the child in me is elsewhere"

Tiyunne knows nothing of the circumstances of her creation, but knows it couldn’t be without reason. She was trained as and works as a mechanic on Kamino, tending to the more major problems of the Republic ships that land on the planet, and is widely known, although nobody knows she is a clone. She does not have accelerated aging like the other clones, so she saw the rise of the clone army first hand, but doesn’t remember much from her childhood, making her further suspicious of the Kaminoans’ intentions for her. She is very witty and personable, easy-going and selfless with her work, which she enjoys immensely and finds particularly intuitive.

[missamyrisa2]

Miss Amy and the Sensitivity Test

I posted this on my dA and old tumblr but since the scenario came in an ask, here it is again for anyone who hasn't read it~<3 And even if you have, I went through and added some more details and dialog because I can't help teasing myself further~<3

Amy twiddled her thumbs nervously. She'd been literally laughed out of work everywhere else in town ever since her secret was spilled at the library. The salon couldn't keep their ladies from testing their makeup and pedicure technique on Amy. The warehouse found Amy going on endless giggle-laden rides on the forklifts in place of the workers moving their shipments. And that stint at the local TV station certainly made for a lively weather update when sneaky crew members were tickling her stockinged feet and sneaking tickles at her sides through the green screen.

All of Amy's supervisors had been reluctant to let her go, they simply couldn't afford the distraction. But most of them were amicable enough to give her one last chance by showing she could hold her composure as the HR reps tested her ticklishness over and over - usually having her held by her arms and feet as questions and tickles were administered in equal measure. Unfortunately, Amy never could fight off those tickles and was brought to giggly exhaustion each time - just to be sure she hadn't passed the test.

Never did Amy guess she would be looking at working a library again, but this new branch was insistent they needed someone with her reputation. Amy was flattered, and then confused when she was told she couldn't start working until a physical exam was completed. Having been through so many tickly adventures, Amy felt as though she had developed a tickle sense to see impending wickedness down the line. Her theory definitely had proven true when she narrowly avoided a gang of feather-toting motorcyclists on the way to the doctor's office. But unfortunately, Amy's tickle sense was not quite honed enough to detect what lay in store in this unassuming exam room.

She sat with an understated trepidation, looking down at her purple socked feet. It seemed odd that the bubbly receptionist insisted Amy take off her shoes and leave them behind at the front desk. "Oh yes, we insist all patients leave their shoes and belongings up here. We don't want any...distractions" Amy complied and couldn't help but feel like she receptionist was jotting down notes about her as she bent over to take off her shoes and straighten up her outfit. It was probably nothing.

"Hello Amy, I'm Dr. Jahli." The doctor entered the room, speaking in a rather mousy tone. Her face was partially hidden under a medical mask, but her eyes were certainly friendly. Amy relaxed a bit and shook hands with the attractively curvy doctor, admiring and crushing on for a moment Dr. Jahli's stylish black dress under a white overcoat, cinched with a wide white belt and shiny oversized buckle. "What we're going to do today is a series of simple tests. Hopefully we should have you out in an hour." Amy pursed her lips, seemed a bit much for a physical, but she really wanted this job.

"Sure, sounds... good."

"The preliminary test is for your hearing and vision. Could you please turn towards this poster over here?" The doctor pointed to a poster with letters of varying sizes. "Please read the top letter?"

Amy furrowed her brow at the giant letter E at the top. "Uh...E?"

"Okay, and the next line?"

"H-a?" Amy said with a shrug.

"And that spells...?"

"Ha? Like ha ha?" Amy smirked. The doctor grinned under her mask.

"And the fifth line?" She continued.

"Brush." Amy thought she saw the doctor tremble as she spoke the next word.

"Mmm. Next?"

"Tickle." Amy said out loud. Both doctor and patient shivered for a moment, though for different reasons and neither seemed to catch each other's tell. Amy assumed it was a coincidence. Her common sense seemed to have a weakness for fetishy story plots. Dr. Jahli took a moment, and then produced a multi-colored fluffy duster.

"Great, Amy. Now can you identify the colors you see as I move this funny little thing around your head?" She fluttered the soft tendrils around Amy's cheek and ears. Amy tried to call out the multiple colors, fighting back her squirms and giggles.

"R-gree-yellow! Um...green! Err. Blue now."

"Mmm-hmm. And what color is down here that I'm pointing to?" The doctor slipped her hands down and drew fingertips over Amy's purple socks.

"Purple!! purple! purple!!!"

"Wonderful. Now we're going to move on to the physical."

"First, I'll need to check your breathing. Lift your shirt please-oh wait." She chuckled, gesturing to Amy's cropped black top, which left much of her midsection exposed.

Amy felt a little twitch scurry across her midsection when Dr. Jahli produced a stethoscope and immediately placed it square on Amy's tummy. "Ooh!"

"Just checking your breathing. Everything sounds...lovely." Amy thought she heard a snicker. The cool end of the tool made Amy writhe slightly.

"Sorry, it's...ee...cold" Amy murmured, feeling a faint prick of blush on her cheeks. Her taut tummy flexed involuntarily and slipped a little gurgle. The doctor took notes and observed closely, nodding slowly.

"That's normal. Your outfit is very cute by the way. And makes this process that much easier. Lean back for me please." Dr. Jahli motioned Amy back on the exam table. Hazel eyes under dark long lashes glanced over Amy's exposed tummy with a curious gaze.

"Thank you...oooh! Oh, okay. okay. Yours is cuute too!" Amy squeaked as the doctor gently placed a palm on Amy's tummy, feeling her breathe rapidly.

"Thank you, you are very sweet. Next I'm just going to press on your abdomen lightly." The touch made Amy's body visibly tremble. Had her eyes not been squinted through her embarrassment, Amy would have seen the knowing glint in the doctor's eyes, betraying the intent of what would follow. "Very good. Does this hurt?"

"N-no!" Amy squeaked out, her tummy inhaling rapidly. The doctor's cool hands following her movement. "I'm going to press a little more. I thought I felt something." Curious fingers slid along Amy's tender skin, probing for reactions and lighting up a pathway of sensitive nerves. "Does this hurt, Amy?"

Amy stammered to respond, fighting back a giggle that eagerly wanted to bounce out of her belly. "It doesn't...hurt." She responded sheepishly. The doctor put a hand on her hip and leaned in to watch the little twitchies echoing the light tickly sensations Amy had been feeling. Amy pressed her lips to stop a babble from escaping. Her eyes rolled back as she felt fingers curiously probing the gap between her shorts and hip, sliding in slightly, grazing that hot spot. A giggly moan was percolating but eased off as the fingers retracted and a mere squeak escaped.

"Okay Amy, I'm just going to test your reflexes now. I'm going to take this across your belly and measure the reaction." Dr. Jahli reached into her coat and produced a long white feather.

"Wait a feather? That can't be right!"

"Please relax Amy, just lean back. I need to test your sensitivity. That's what this exam is for." She reassured, waving the supple instrument back and forth slowly. Amy gripped the table and inhaled sharply as the wispy feather tip stroked in a crescent pattern over her bellybutton, then did the same under it. Small giggles slipped from Amy's mouth as she tried to hold back.

"Don't try to fight it. Just react naturally. I'm going to test the reflexes in your bellybutton next" Amy closed her eyes and squeaked out as the feather traced the rim of her navel before flicking over each side. "What about this? Does this hurt? Amy? Aaaamy?"

"...Yesss!! It tickles!!"

"Oh, it does?" She replied with mock concern. "Well that is...unexpected, but side effects are common with this test. You're doing wonderfully." Dr. Jahli said warmly, watching Amy's tummy quiver madly from the feathery inquisition. She exchanged the feather for a small wand with hair-like protrusions. Amy thought it looked a lot like a mascara wand, and when she estimated the size of the wand and what it was designed to probe, she nearly jumped from the exam table.

"Ok hold the phone! Put it on hold and redial. Is that necessary?"

"Oh yes, Amy. This is just the next procedure for your reflexive test. Please lean back."

"But...that's a really...sensitive area."

"Yes, I should think so. Don't worry yourself, this is all very standard testing procedures. Now please, we need to test here otherwise we won't be able to give you the approval for your job."

Amy sighed and watched that little tool as the doctor dipped it into a container. When it was pulled out, the little spiky hairs glistened with oil. Amy trembled as it drew closer, the doctor twisting it back and forth. A hand was placed on Amy's tummy to hold it steady. "Just relax Amy." Amy giggled uncontrollably as the lubricated surface began twirling into her navel, eliciting all manner of twitches and bounces. "Relax sweetheart." Amy tried to hold on but she was bucking and laughing within moments of the wand entering her highly sensitive navel, and it only got worse as it was slowly drilled back and forth with all those little tickly hairs stimulating her ticklish nerves on all sides.

"You're doing so well Amy!" Dr. Jahli said over Amy's hysteric giggles, holding her belly tight as she twirled the tickly wand back and forth, dipping it in and out, coating Amy's tender button with the tickly oil. When it finally withdrew for the last time, Amy was gasping through silly giggles, her face a mess of blushes and stray hairs. She barely had time to gain some composure when the doctor next produced a small white implement with a hose leading under the table. With the flick of a switch, the hollow tip squealed to life, making a sucking noise.

"Now we'll just need to clean up that excess oil. This is Mr. Thirsty~" Immediately Amy could see the tip as a mouth and the bolts on the top as eyes looking to their target ahead of his snakey body. Amy whimpered as he was taken to her twitching tickled navel. Mr. Thirsty eagerly gobbled up the excess droplets of oil, the air rushing over Amy's sensitized skin like an invisible carpet of tiny feathers. Amy tried to endure but found her hips trembling in protest and laughs freely falling out of her mouth.

"Please stop!! That tickles so much!! I don't think I like Mr. Thirstyyy"

"Amy, you're fine. You're doing just fine. He's just here to help, aren't you Mr. Thirsty." The doctor retorted, lovingly stroking Amy's long locks of blonde hair as she mercilessly ran the suction tool all along Amy's rim and inner crevice. When at last her bellybutton was clear of the tickly oil, Amy was even more a mess of ticklish laughs. Just when she thought it couldn't get worse, the doctor produced a large metal bucket from under the table. The second sound was Dr. Jahli snapping a medical glove onto her hand.

"Oh my gosh, what is next? Haven't you tested me enough?"

"Most definitely not." she balked, barely suppressing a giggle. "Okay Amy, the library has deemed it necessary to test your cold sensitivity. Sometimes the air conditioning in the building goes on the fritz and they need to know you can withstand such conditions."

"Seriously?"

"Absolutely. We don't want you to get frostbite. If you aren't able to detect a sudden drop in temperature then the library would be liable. Now~there are a few spots that are most viable for this test." The doctor replied, motioning Amy to lean back once again as she reached into her bucket and produced an ice cube. With one hand on Amy's beltline, she carefully positioned the frigid cube and began grazing it along Amy's abdomen and waist, tracing along the top of Amy's little shorts.

"How does that feel, Amy?"

"It's....cold!" Amy squirmed and writhed, feeling the blast of coolness riveting through her midsection. It was a different sort of tickle, but one that made her giggle out all the same. The streaks of cooling sensation lingered and layered as the ice cube went back and forth.

"I might have guessed that Amy. Does this tickle? Does the cold make you more ticklish?"

"I think so?? Maybe? What do you care? I don't know!! Just stop....stop icing meee!" Amy protested as the cube was taken up her happy trail and in circles around her navel, and over to each hip where it deposited little droplets of arctic water. Amy laughed out and trembled on the table, legs shaking as the coolness continued to send tickly shocks down her form even after the doctor withdrew the ice cube. The droplets running down into her shorts coated her hips and even her upper thighs with tickly streaks. "You're doing great, Amy."

"Sorry, looks like I've gotten some water on you."

Amy begged her no as she heard the suction tool firing up again. "That's no...not necessary please nooo! Not Mr. Thirsty!" She cried out in laughter with her objections ignored as the water was sucked away from her skin, stimulating those muscles and nerves further as Dr. Jahli meticulously cleaned every bit of her wiggling skin. The cool water had nearly filled Amy's navel to the brim, so the doctor placed Mr. Thirsty in Amy's crevice and let it drain away the liquid, occasionally sucking at the bottom of Amy's navel, tugging on the little hidden nubbin. Amy howled with laughter, trying to stay on the table as her feet kicked madly.

Amy was left gasping, barely able to hold on or resist as the doctor continued.

"Very good. Now we need to move to a new test site. Just relax Amy." She reached up and rolled Amy's cropped top further, exposing Amy's little nipples. Amy barely had a chance to whine when a new ice fragment was applied to her sensitive nubbin.

"Mmmhh!! Not there!"

"Does it tickle, Amy? Does ice on your nipple tickle you?" The doctor continued her line of questioning, smiling through her mask knowing Amy could never produce a response as she laughed and squirmed herself silly. Amy's face was completely red with blush, and the blooms spread down her neck quickly.

"Yussss it's mmmh okay okay okayyyyyy royal button pushes you're entering the Amynami code for extra ticklessss!"

"You're doing great Amy. Just a little more on this nipple. Whoops. I think we need Mr. Thirsty again." Amy screamed a laugh as the ice was circling her nipple and Mr. Thirsty eagerly caught the excess water while tugging incessantly at her button like a little pair of lips. Her nipples swelled in protest, and her giggles grew higher pitched.

"Doing okay, Amy?"

Amy gasped and rolled her eyes, laying flat against the table. "Um. I'm a little tickled! How about we stop for a minute."

"We're almost finished with the procedures Amy. You can take a break when we're done." The doctor grew authoritative for a moment, not that Amy had the energy at this point to get off the table or even resist as the doctor moved to take her bare hand to Amy's belly and another ice cube to her nipples.

"We're going to test both your belly and chest now. It is important to ascertain whether or not you can withstand both at once." Amy's eyes widened and she squealed out in laughter as finely manicured nails began ever so lightly scratching along her belly while a fresh ice cube was circling around each nipple in a figure-8 pattern. Amy gasped and threw her arms about, kicked her feet up and down, trying to endure the dual tickles. The nails followed her squirms, darting in and out of her navel, tracing her waistline back and forth, spidering up each side. The ice melted away on her buttons and ribs, and even made its way up to her neck occasionally. When one cube grew small, the remains were placed into her navel to fill it with the cold liquid, and a new cube was retrieved. The water droplets in her bellybutton were then splashed about as a finger came in to play, diving into the water with taunting taps sending tiny splashes everywhere. This of course, necessitated a visit from Mr. Thirsty to happily vacuum up the excess. By the end of this procedure, Amy was a mushy giggling mess.

Dimly aware of what was happening next, Amy felt her body being repositioned. Her legs were pulled up on to the table. Her arms were lifted. She tried to resist, but couldn't stop giggling, and her eyes were a haze of tears. By the time she recentered, Amy looked down to see her legs sitting on stirrups and looked up to see her arms were gently bound over her head with a restraint.

"Doing okay Amy? You were struggling a lot with the last test so this is just a safety protocol."

Amy nodded dreamily, it seemed all so reasonable. Just another test for the job right? All she had to do was sit and relax and giggle a little. No big deal. Amy smiled and watched as Dr. Jahli retrieved new instruments. Both her hands were gloved now. A large canister was wheeled out near the exam table and she pulled up a hose with a pointed nozzle. Before Amy could even get the words to protest, the machine whizzed to life. With a loud blast of sound, a white cloud erupted from the tip of her tool and coated Amy's belly with frigid crystals.

Amy's dreamy haze was quickly knocked away by renewed intense sensitive sensation as the doctor now worked her true craft freely. She dusted Amy's nipples next with the icy dust. "Doing great Amy!" her tone never wavered as Amy bucked in her bondage, laughing from the sensation, screaming with laughs as the doctor then took her multi-colored duster and twirled it all about Amy's over-sensitized skin.

"What perfect reactions. What a lovely body you have Amy." The doctor's shifted tone sent Amy into giggly hysterics. It happened again. And then a more intense look from those hazel eyes flashed.

"You love to tease with your lovely body don't you? Yes, I can tell. You love that attention."

Those sweet yet imposing words made Amy blush all over, even as she wiggled helplessly, bucking up and down, every tendril of that fluffy tool like a rapid scattering detonation of tickly fingers, scurrying about her body. As her body eventually warmed up, Amy's laughs and struggles leveled off. She relaxed for a moment, ready to protest these new tests, but lost the words as she squeaked helplessly at the sight of the next procedure.

"I'm just going to use some vibratory testing now. Most people say it's like a little massage." Dr. Jahli held up a wand with a big spherical soft tip, which hummed softly and lit up brightly. She let it graze along Amy's ribs and underarms, up over her nipples, and down to each hip. Amy screeched with giggles, trying desperately to pull away as those vibrations extracted some deep-laden laughs.

"What beautiful big belly laughs. Just let it out now. This is what you wanted, you wanted attention didn't you? A naughty thing, I think." She murmured, drawing the wand over Amy's navel and waist, her free hand playing at Amy's waistline. At last Amy was able to manage some words.

"You! You don't understand!! You don't know what you're doing to me!"

The doctor cocked her head to one side, letting the wand rest on Amy's waistline. Amy could see the grin in her eyes, and shuddered.

"Well, you've certainly piqued my curiosity Amy. There is something I thought I saw, and now it definitely needs further investigation."

Deep red blush appeared down Amy's face as she tried to hide in her hair. She pulled at her bonds frantically as she felt those medical gloves playing at her belt, moving over the material. "Nuuuu don't ooh gosh pllleeease don't!"

"Mmm?" Dr. Jahli watched Amy's reactions closely as she carefully and slowly unbuckled the large silver flower-shaped buckle by pulling it loose from the black belt. She studied Amy's whimpers as her fingers pulled the button from her shorts and unzipped them, which was difficult to start and easy to finish from the swelling panties peaking out below. Amy breathlessly giggle moaned when the doctor began tugging down her little shorts. Heavy gasps followed as she felt her pink panties being exposed, and the pressure of her tight shorts being pulled away.

The doctor cast her curious eyes downward, looking up and down at the swell in Amy's hot pink frilly undergarments. "Well, you are certainly full of surprises, Amy." Amy tried desperately to close her legs, to twist away as her doctor leaned down and inspected the swollen fabric, lightly tracing a fingertip along its length. Amy quivered.

"No don't!! Oh gossssh you're killing meee!"

"I believe more sensitivity tests are in order. I'm just going to tickle your thighs and waist now"

Amy squealed in disbelief, once again laughing hysterically as fingers began squeezing at her bare thighs and a feather traced her frilly waistline back and forth, teasing that panty line over and over. "You're doing great Amy!"

Her howls were interrupted by the occasional moan as the doctor would let the feather dip into her panties or would quickly reach up to plunge a probing finger into Amy's oversensitized navel. This repeated until Amy was once again a melted puddle of giggles, the teases and tickles just wearing her down.

"I think...this is needed. You are clearly teasing people. And it's quite appropriate for you to feel the sensations right back, and perhaps tenfold, Amy."

Once again the doctor decided to use the cold to reactivate her little test subject. Amy pulled at her wrists and giggled out when she heard the nozzle blasting again, but looked down in shock when she didn't feel the dust coating any part of her body. Instead she looked up in horror to see Dr. Jahli had removed her belt from her shorts and was dousing the metal buckle with the solution.

"Metal is an excellent conductor of cold. I didn't have any spare material to do this test so I hope you don't mind I borrowed this." Amy shook her head no frantically as the shiny buckle was lowered to her belly and placed on her navel. The ultra cold surface sent spidering tickle sensations radiating outward in all directions. The doctor kept it pressed there as she took her vibrating wand up and down the bulge in Amy's panties.

"Get it off!! It's too cold I can feel the petals ooh my gosh this is too tickly!! Don't touch my princess part!!"

"Doing sooo great Amy!"

The doctor kept her vibing tool and the frigid buckle trained to Amy's body, delighting as she struggled to fight the dual sensations off. When it seemed Amy was right on the edge of a ticklegasm, she withdrew both and began dancing long feathers over Amy's exposed legs while she came down slowly from the intense teasing.

"I'm so glad you were brought to me Amy. The other doctors here I don't think would appreciate you like I do." She playfully tugged at Amy's pantyline, adjusting it over her swollen princess parts.

Amy tried to regain any composure, but found she was so overtickled by this point she simply laid there and took her tickles, along with the revelation that this was a very carefully planned tickle attack. And with the doctor's next words, she began to realize this woman knew so much about Amy.

"For our final test, I'm going to really push your envelope." She picked up Amy's thick belt again and started wrapping it around her waist. Amy whimpered as her beloved yet extremely teasing companion floated back over, the shiny flower glinting in the overhead light. "You really like this thing don't you? It sort of lights your fire?"

Amy whimpered as she felt her belt being put around her pantyline, and positioned just so it went over her swollen naughty parts. She nodded embarrassingly, trying to stifle her moans as she watched the flower buckle placed right over her most tender member, the pressure on that hot spot from something she highly fetishized immediately sending her into overdrive. The doctor was quick to restart the tickle attack, digging her wiggly fingers into Amy's bellybutton and thigh. Every squirm adjusted the pressure on Amy's panties, and she knew she wouldn't hold on long. The doctor eventually brought the vibrating wand back out and started tracing the buckle, sending the vibes down through the metal and her frilly panties. Amy's giggling moans were almost soundless. She had been brought to the brink so many times. Her body simply complied to the tickles, struggling and bucking sweetly as Dr. Jahli edged her once more.

"You're doing just great Amy."

At last with one completely soundless scream, Amy arched and pulled when the vibrations and pressure triggered her ticklegasm. She laughed, snorted, and moaned out, her body flopping wildly. Her princess part swelled to a new maximum hardness performance, working its way out of the panties with the crown poking out from under the belt. Her words were complete squeaking gibberish capped off with a desperate scream as she gigglecame, princess drops spilling out and pooling into her bellybutton before falling limply back to the table and bucking gently through giggling aftershocks. Through the slits in her eyes and the fuzz in her ears, Amy saw the doctor was exchanging her tools one more time. "Guess we need Mr. Thirsty again."

[pennysperfectpolls]

Preliminaries round 2 match 6

Pennywise (It) vs Penny Hofstadter (Big Bang Theory) vs Penny (Dr Horrible’s Sing Along Blog)

Only 2 will move on

Propaganda under the cut

Pennywise (IT)

• Scary, goofy outfit, gives out balloons

• he's a clown. he's a demon. he's an alien. he's a serial killer. a bunch of kids with a baseball bat are enough to take him down.

• funny murder clown, i wanna see him among all the other probably not clowny pennies.

• :)

Penny Hofstadter (Big Bang Theory)

• Penny has no last name but when married, it becomes Penny Hofstadter. Her brother was in jail for drugs. She definitely does not have an alcohol problem. She had an addiction to video games causing her to not move for days. She marries Leonard despite everyone believing she could do better. She is described as a gorilla many times, which is ironic as she starred in a film where she turned into a gorilla.

• She's the only main character who doesnt have a phd but also the only one who knows how to gut a fish so i guess it balances out

Penny (Dr. Horrible’s Sing Along Blog)

• she’s an incredible and tragic character whose love and trust gets her killed in the end. also Dr horrible is a very underrated media in general I want her to win

• Ordinary person in a supervillain story, just wants to shelter people and do her laundry. Relatable!

• She’s a sexy lamp but boy is she a cutie

• She’s the only genuinely good person in the whole show. She’s sweet and very naive. Love her <3

• Penny is an extremely empathetic and caring person. She works at a homeless shelter and is gentle and friendly with everyone there. She meets the main character at a laundromat and immediately becomes a very supportive and encouraging friend. Her goal throughout the narrative is to open a second location of the shelter so she can help more people. She has a sad backstory of not being accepted when she was younger and has learned to focus on optimism to make it through. Her main flaw is that she tolerates a romantic relationship with a man who doesnt respect her because she isn't well-practiced with respecting herself, but after he takes it too far, she does stand up for herself and walk out on him (growth!)

Pollrunners notes: all of these are some of the most submitted characters

[sporco-filth]

Superhero to Superslob - pt 3

two stories in one day wow

Honestly I would have just combined parts two and three but I wanted them separate.

Synopsis: Jupiter is now well and truly a slob and it doesn't look like he'll be going back anytime soon...

"Ugh…" Justin sighed, looking into the mirror. "What's happened to me?" It had been, what? two weeks? since his last fight with Corruptor and so he hadn't had any reason to wear his supersuit. But lately, Justin had been noticing some… unexpected changes. His pants had started to get a bit tight and his shirts were starting to rise up to reveal a mound of fat that had formed over his six pack. Now, he was standing in front of the mirror, in his supersuit, trying to see if the changes were really that noticeable. They were. Supersuits don't leave a lot to the imagination. He ran a hand along the curve of his belly, feeling the bulge beneath the thin, silky fabric of the supersuit. It wasn't a lot of fat, but for someone who took great pride in his fitness, it was a shock. And yet… for some reason, he didn't feel quite as disgusted with himself as he expected. He quickly pulled his hand away and shook his head. No, he needed to focus. Who'd ever heard of an overweight superhero?

He went to the kitchen and took in the slowly accumulating piles of empty take away boxes. He'd been developing an insatiable craving for all things salty, fatty and sweet. Plus, he was struggling to find the energy to put in the effort to cook proper meals, and buying take away or junk food was just so much easier. His stomach growled. I can start dieting tomorrow, he reasoned, going to the fridge. I mean, it's not like I'll get rid of this gut in a day, so what's one more or one less in the grand scheme of things? He pulled out a frozen lasagna from the freezer and grabbed a bottle of beer left out on the counter. With his superstrong teeth, he bit off the cap and spat it onto the floor where it joined other rubbish he'd let build up. Justin's motivation to clean had taken a nosedive lately, but focused on sating his hunger, he paid the mess no mind. He plopped down on the couch and, focusing on his frozen pasta, he used his heat vision to warm it up. Soon the scent of baked pasta and golden brown cheese wafted through the apartment. He went to take a sip of beer and frowned. "Gah, it's warm. I should've remembered to put it in the fridge." Justin inhaled and blew gently on the glass bottle, his freeze breath chilling it to the perfect temperature. He dub into his meal, enjoying the feeling of the greasy carbs as they settled in his stomach. He took a swig of beer to wash it down and let out a burp:

"BOOOOOAAAAAAUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURRRRRRRRRRPPPP!"

Being a superhero, Justin's belches were naturally amplified. He chuckled to himself and patted his stomach. "I'll scare the neighbours if I'm not careful." He continued to shovel down lasagna, wiping his sauce-covered fingers on his supersuit and using his cape as a napkin. When he was done, he simply tossed the tray aside and lay down on the couch. His gut bloated with pasta and beer, Justin noticed the bottom of his belly peeking out from under his supersuit's top. "Boy, I really packed that away," he smiled. "I guess being a superhero means I've got supersized stomach capacity." He brushed his fingers along the slither of uncovered skin, feeling oddly proud of himself.

Meanwhile, at the junkyard, the Corruptor and Glob watched on their monitor. "It's working!" the Corruptor cheered. "Look at him! He's becoming a fat slob!" "This seems to be confirming my theory," Glob jotted down some notes. "You see, my preliminary tests had suggested the ray might have a mental effect on the victim." "A mental effect? I thought it just weakened Jupiter?" "Yes, but it also weakens his mental strength, his ability to resist temptation. It seems it's reducing his ability to make good judgements when one of the options gives instant gratification and the other requires hard work." "What does that mean for us?" Glob smirked. "I think it means pretty soon, he'll start to enjoy being a lazy slob so much that he won't be able to stop himself." She looked at the monitor and saw Justin reach out for a pack of lollies which he proceeded to pour down his gullet. "Maybe it's already too late for him… Shall we start the ambush soon?" "No, no…" the Corruptor said, rubbing his chin pensively as he watched Justin make a pig of himself. "I was impatient before, but watching what we've achieved, I wonder if perhaps we had the wrong tactic. It seems we might not even need to strike." "We won't?" The Corruptor grinned. "No. I think Jupiter might bring about his own demise all on his own…"

[allisticntprivilege]

I saw you reblogging a post about NT experts on mental states&illnesses and I wondered: What do you think about Simon Baron-Cohen and his works&ideas he postulates? (I myself don't like him but that's just me and that would extend the limits of this ask box...)

He has moved from Direct Pathologizing (extreme male brain, theory of mind -- which is still his most cited work, describing autistic transmasculinity & autistic women not being straight as testosterone related disorders) to aspie elitism masquerading as neurodiversity (but still some theory of mind shit) but, like, that’s still bad. Aspie supremacy can kill.

And, like, there’s his idea of what post-diagnostic support means: https://wchh.onlinelibrary.wiley.com/doi/full/10.1002/psb.1816 and the categorization of AAC as only showing preliminary evidence of benefit https://www.thelancet.com/article/S1474-4422(20)30034-X/abstract (Hint: no, if you consider the AAC fields own literature it gets the same Evidence-Based label, and if you don’t consider the field’s own literature then that rule should be applied to all the other folks studying their own so-called supports.)

He is, at this point, supervising work where a careful reader trying to pull useful bits out will absolutely find those useful buts. However, never trust his framing of anything. The framing still tends to be very Typical Autism Essay.

[aesethewitch]

Digital Divination: Preliminary Thoughts & Personal Theories

If you've been following the last week or so, you may have seen me ranting about questions regarding digital divination. I've been fascinated with divination since I was a teenager, and now I've got a handful of personal theories and UPGs that I definitely take for granted. It's been a long time since I've asked the whys and hows of divination.

Time to go back to square one.

But if I'm going to dive into what makes divination work and, therefore, why digital divination does or doesn't work, I ought to start with what I know. Or, rather, what I think. So, we start with my personal theory.

*cracks knuckles*

Why does divination work in the first place?

I suppose it depends on what you're using it for. Some use it to literally divine the future. Others see divination as a tool for self-reflection or as a meditative focus. Others still seem somewhere in between, using it as a introspective tool to help with decision making based off of what is already known.

I fall somewhere between the "true" diviners of the future and the introspective tool users. In my opinion, divination (especially tarot) is best used as an assistant and self-improvement tool. I believe divination can predict the future… sort of.

It isn't perfect. That's certain. My existing running theory on why divination works has to do with the interconnectivity of all things, and this is why it works both ways, depending on the diviner's goals. It's either that, or the diviner is specifically requesting messages or assistance from a spirit, who guides their attention and tools toward the appropriate answers.

In the case of interconnectivity, the diviner essentially "taps into" those connections. This doesn't necessarily have to be via meditation or trance. For me, I rarely need to do either. It does require a focus, though, which I suppose could be construed as a trance-like state. The process involves reaching out for the connections and following them to draw conclusions.

In the case of spirit communication or receiving messages, it works somewhat similarly. I don't think that spirits can directly, tangibly affect the physical world we exist in. I do think they can manipulate connections like we can (and sometimes with greater effectiveness or power). So rather than a spirit shuffling and literally pulling the cards for you, they might tug on a connection to your hands and make a card fly out, influence you to stop shuffling at a certain point, tug on the strands surrounding a pendulum to make it swing, etc.

This all ties in with my personal views on fate and faith and free will, which... I may talk about at some point. For now, *handwaves us onwards*.

But Aese, you offer tarot readings all the time. You even take money for tarot readings! Don't you think they can predict the future? I hear you ask, very hypothetically.

Yes! And also, no.

According to my theory, it isn't so simple. There are countless winding, interconnected paths weaving into a blurred future which hasn't taken shape yet. Though I believe in fate (*noncommittal handwiggle with accompanying ehhhhh, it's complicated noise*), the willful interference of humanity and spirits in the world reshapes the future constantly.

At its core, divination is a connection to the inner self, the subconscious. It's through this connection, branching outwards into the world, that we're able to divine.

There is no way to be 100% positive about an outcome. There is always a chance that something will change and alter the situation and, therefore, the future. Nothing is set in stone until it happens. This is why you'll get divinatory readings that resonate really strongly but which don't come to pass.

The goal with divination shouldn't be to obtain certainty. It should be a tool to observe the present and determine the most likely outcomes. It's a decision-making assistant. Is it often correct? When I do it, yes. But that's because I'm specifically pulling for the most likely outcome. Without severe interference (and sometime accounting for it), I find a rather consistent success rate.

For this reason, I don't like yes/no questions. The answer is almost always going to be "maybe." People don't particularly like that, especially people who don't do divination themselves.

I also immediately distrust any diviner who espouses a 100% accuracy guarantee when predicting the future (unless, of course, it's hyperbole for advertising or humor purposes). I definitely believe there are those whose accuracy rates are extremely high and who have a certain skill with divination. They deserve to be proud of their skills. Hell, I'm proud of my skills.

But no one will ever be 100% accurate all the time. You would have to account for every tangent, every twist, every interference to be perfectly accurate. And to do that would take so much time, effort, and skill that it would be prohibitively expensive and/or a ridiculous waste. Just go live your life. Yeesh.

But none of this mentions tools. None of my existing theories require that I have a firm connection to a tool. I've picked up a new tarot deck and had spectacular success without practice or "seasoning" it.

So why, then, doesn't digital divination work for me?

I don't know! I have absolutely no idea. It could be because of my personal connection to the medium, it could be unfamiliarity, it could be that I just don't like it and so it doesn't work. It could be a preconception that it won't work, and therefore, it ends up inaccurate. Not a clue!

Yet.

My next steps are going to be compiling other theories on why divination works. I want to have as wide a net to cast as possible so that I can test multiple theories at once. Then, I'll hunt down as many apps, websites, and various online tools as I can to test, dig through reviews, decide which ones to use, and then get down to it. It's the scientific method, baby! Hypothesis, experiment, record results, do it again.

If you have thoughts, theories, or want to yell about divination with me, feel free to add a comment or reply or send me an ask. I'm going absolutely feral about this and would love to chat about it!!

If you like my work and want to throw a couple dollars my way via Ko-Fi, it would be much appreciated! This research is going to be mostly public for exposure and interaction, but there may be behind-the-scenes notes and more in-depth UPG stuff that'll be Ko-Fi exclusive. Plus, even one-time supporters get extra and early stuff all the time!

[mariacallous]

This story first appeared in Signal, Meduza’s Russian-language newsletter on the rhetoric of Putinism. The translation below appeared in The Beet, a weekly email dispatch from Meduza covering Central and Eastern Europe, the Caucasus, and Central Asia. Sign up here to get the next issue of The Beet delivered directly to your inbox.

Hello, and welcome back to The Beet! 

Almost exactly one month ago, a group of gunmen attacked the Crocus City Hall concert venue on the outskirts of Moscow, killing and injuring hundreds of people. A

On the evening of March 22, terrorists attacked Crocus City Hall, a concert venue outside of Moscow where a crowd of spectators was waiting to see a performance by the Russian band Piknik. Several men armed with machine guns entered the venue, opened fire on the crowd, set fire to the building, and then fled. The attack killed 144 people and injured more than 500 others. As of this writing, dozens of concertgoers are still considered missing. 

Almost immediately, unconfirmed reports emerged, including in the Western press, that an ISIS offshoot had taken responsibility for the events at Crocus City Hall. By midday on March 23, the ISIS-affiliated news outlet Amaq was reporting that Islamic State militants “had carried out a coordinated attack on a large crowd of Christians.” Then, news broke that the FSB had made a number of arrests in connection with the attack, and that at least some of the apprehended suspects were citizens of Tajikistan.

Nearly 24 hours after the tragedy, Vladimir Putin addressed the Russian people. He declared March 24 a day of national mourning and promised that all those responsible for the terrorist attack would be punished.

That phrase, “terrorist attack” — terakt in Russian — was once a central element of Putin’s rhetoric. Now, after more than a decade on the sidelines, it has reemerged in Russian politics, displacing the out-of-favor (and banned in the context of Russia’s ongoing invasion of Ukraine) word “war.” 

Who is to blame?

The FSB has arrested — and in some cases, tortured — around a dozen suspects in connection with the March 22 attack, but the identities of its architects are still unknown. 

Amid an emerging global consensus that the attack on Crocus City Hall was the work of ISIS-K, or the Islamic State-Khorasan, which operates primarily in Pakistan and Afghanistan, the Russian public seems inclined to believe otherwise. Judging by the tenor of Russian social media discourse, at least, a few other narratives are gaining more traction.

The first alternative theory points the finger at Ukraine. Margarita Simonyan, editor-in-chief of the state-controlled media network RT, called reports linking the attack to ISIS “fake,” strongly suggesting in social media posts that Ukraine organized the attack with help from the “collective West.” The so-called Z-patriot war bloggers are unanimously critical of the Russian security forces’ impotence but haven’t reached a consensus on whether they believe Western intelligence or Kyiv orchestrated the attack. Deputy Security Council Chairman Dmitry Medvedev was especially quick to blame the “Kyiv regime.” Putin also referenced “preliminary information” about Ukraine’s role in the attack.

Then there are the Kremlin opponents who believe that Russian authorities engineered the attack. They support this idea with a conspiracy theory from the late 1990s, which holds that a series of apartment bombings in Moscow during that period was an inside job. This particular theory seems to be gaining popularity — on the day of the Crocus attack, there were over 200 times more hits, compared to the previous baseline, for the Wikipedia page about the Moscow apartment blasts. The anti-Putin opposition also believes the attack will be a pretext for Russian authorities to “tighten the screws” and announce a second wave of mobilization following Putin’s recent “electoral victory.” 

For now, there are more questions than answers surrounding the March 22 attack. But it does seem clear that a feeling united Russians that day, and it had little to do with the logistics of the attack. For more than a decade, the phrase “terrorist attack” meant one of two things for most Russians: something that happened far away to other people or a meaningless phrase in Federal Security Service reports about the latest successful operation thwarting an attempt to “destabilize the socio-political situation” in Russia.

There have been times in relatively recent Russian history when both terrorism and the expectation of the next attack were routine. Memories of those times seemed to be well buried. But after March 22, they suddenly burst to the surface, inflecting Russians’ perceptions of what happened that night at Crocus City Hall.

Pandemic, war, drone attacks, shelling in cities on the Russia–Ukraine border — none of these notably catastrophic events called up a remotely similar reaction. Crocus, like the town of Beslan, will forever be connected with terrorism in the minds of Russians. Many will never forget where they were and what they were doing when they first heard that men with machine guns had stormed the entertainment complex.

‘All of us’

The terrorist attack on Crocus City Hall wasn’t simply a mass shooting at a concert venue — it was also a reminder of all the other traumatic events in Russia’s relatively recent past. And collective traumas tend to unite, at least momentarily, even very fragmented and atomized societies, becoming part of civic identity. 

In the weeks that followed, Russian society has fiercely debated the specifics of the attack: whether it could have been prevented, the adequacy and proportionality of authorities’ response, and who should be held responsible. At the same time, Russians quickly came to view Crocus City Hall as an attack on “all of us,” merging it with the collective memory of the terrorist attacks that became a crucial part of national identity in the 1990s and 2000s.  

That period was a difficult and dangerous one for Russians, marked by the apartment bombings in Moscow and Volgodonsk in 1999; the bombing of Moscow’s Pushkin Square in 2000; the bombing of the Victory Day parade in Kaspiysk, Dagestan, in 2002; the Moscow theater hostage crisis in 2002; suicide bombings at the Krylya rock festival in Tushino, outside of Moscow, in 2003; an explosion on a commuter train in Stavropol Krai in 2003; a bombing on the Moscow metro in 2003; the Beslan school siege in 2004; bombings on the Moscow metro in 2010; a suicide bombing in Moscow’s Domodedovo Airport in 2011; and many other incidents.

People who experienced this difficult era remember the pervasive fear that came with it: the sense that you or your loved ones could be killed at any moment; the habit of avoiding large crowds; and finding comfort in superstitious behaviors, like always sitting on the fourth subway car because the last bombing happened on the second one. 

That omnipresent fear was largely forgotten over the course of the last 10 years or so — and this is widely considered a great achievement for Russian society. But the feeling turned out to be lurking under the surface. Now, following the Crocus attack, a new generation of people, who don’t personally remember residential buildings blowing up in Moscow or suicide bombings at music festivals, will inherit the collective memory of living daily life in fear. 

Making connections

Like “terakt,” the word “connections” has a specific set of connotations regarding security issues in Putin’s Russia. Following Crocus, pro-Putin media started referring to a possible “Ukraine connection.” To understand that phrase, it’s helpful to recall past “connections” Russia has made.

From 1994 to 1996, Russia was at war with the separatist Chechen Republic of Ichkeria, and by the mid-1990s, the phrase “Chechen connections” was already played out in public discourse. Authorities and media searched for “connections to Chechnya” in almost every high-profile murder or fraud case. During that period, it was not uncommon to hear government officials attribute any and every social problem to the “Chechen connection” or the “Islamic factor.” The tendency was so widespread that novelist Viktor Pelevin satirized it in the 1999 novel Generation P.

In the 2000s, when Russia was waging its second war on Chechen separatism and suffered a series of bloody terrorist attacks, “Chechnya” was usually the first and main explanation for unfortunate or tragic events — it was also often the correct explanation.

“Chechen connections” were subsequently found in high-profile cases like the murder of opposition politician Boris Nemtsov in 2015 and the arson attack on a local office of Russian human rights organization Memorial in Ingushetia in 2018 (the Putin administration forced Memorial to shut down in 2021). In the 2010s, however, the phrase took on a different meaning. In the 1990s and 2000s, vague “connections” to Chechnya were supposed to lead back to Chechen militants hiding out in the Caucasus mountains. More recently, it has come to mean the Chechen authorities — i.e. regional Governor Ramzan Kadyrov and his security forces. And though the phrase persists in the media, Russian officials no longer utter the words “connections to Chechnya.”

Similarly, after Georgia’s 2003 Rose Revolution, and especially following the 2008 Russia–Georgia War, Russian state media and authorities sought out “Georgian connections.” The ones they found were somewhat tenuous. After the Beslan school siege in 2004, then-Deputy Chairman of the State Duma Sergey Baburin and Foreign Minister Sergey Lavrov both hinted at possible links to Georgia. In 2010, Russian Security Council Secretary Nikolay Patrushev said that an investigation had uncovered “Georgian connections” in two bombings on the Moscow metro. (Chechen separatist militant leader Dokka Umarov, who was presumed to be residing in Georgian territory at that point, took responsibility for the attacks, which killed 41 people.) In 2012, Russian security forces and propagandists claimed that Givi Targamadze, a Georgian politician and leading figure in the Rose Revolution, had organized rioting at a Moscow protest.

From terrorist threat to moral panic

Vladimir Putin sees his chief task as Russian president as eliminating all real and imagined threats against his personal power and Russia itself. The Kremlin is always fighting off carefully labeled menaces: “Chechen terrorists,” “color revolutions,” “the Collective West,” “anti-Russia,” “U.S. hegemony,” “LGBT ideology,” and so on.

If the threats on that list seem increasingly abstract, it’s because the real threats to Putin’s presidency have dissipated (or, more accurately, been systematically eliminated), leading the Russian authorities to set their sights on potential future threats. And where they’ve failed to find potential threats, they’ve resorted to fabricating them. This process has had some unintended consequences: the constant search for threats inevitably leads to over-simplifications of politically complex issues, as well as to bizarre phobias — which explains how Russian politicians wound up asserting that Russia’s Armed Forces are waging war against gender-neutral toilets in Ukraine.

At times, the Kremlin’s perception of actual threats differs sharply from ordinary Russians’ perceptions. To try to bridge that gap, Russian authorities learned to incite moral panics during Putin’s third term as president, from 2012 to 2018. The government sought broad social support and, perhaps even more importantly, the appearance of support for its policies, by presenting Russia as the defender of “traditional values,” “the union between man and woman,” and other conservative social positions. In 2024, the supposed potential threat now comes from the “collective West” rather than somewhere deep in the Caucasus. 

The political mechanism is simple: convince people that someone or something (the LGBTQ+ community, globalism, migrants — it doesn’t really matter who or what) threatens their safety and their way of life, and that the authorities are protecting them from that threat.

Politicians the world over propose urgent, decisive measures and see their popularity rise, their supporters rally around them, and their power to enact their own agendas grow. Examples abound: Hungarian Prime Minister Viktor Orban, Turkish President Recep Tayyip Erdoğan, Putin, and many others. The specific enemy in every moral panic is new, but the threat — the destruction of a common way of life — is always the same. 

The moral panic mechanism is most effective in authoritarian regimes, like Putin’s Russia, where the authorities control the information space. But it’s not limited to autocracies — the right wing in the U.S. incited very successful moral panics about hippies in the 1970s and “gay culture” in the 1980s.  

A transparent — but powerful — pretext

The attack on Crocus City Hall was a real — not imaginary or potential — threat to public security, but Ukraine is the subject of Russia’s current moral panic. The Russian authorities are seeking a “Ukrainian connection” in the Crocus events simply out of inertia — their current worldview leaves no room for any other enemy. 

But no one — not Dmitry Medvedev, not Margarita Simonyan, and none of the pro-Kremlin war bloggers (with maybe an exception or two) — is really out to convince millions of Russian nationals that Ukraine organized the Crocus attack.

The main audience for “Ukraine connection” propaganda is Vladimir Putin himself. And, of course, he doesn’t need to be convinced of anything. What he requires is a demonstration that everyone — from the security forces and propagandists to the Russian people — is behind him and shares his fixation on Ukraine. As for everyone else, the public demonstration of belief in a “Ukraine connection” is a core part of Russia’s current patriotic credo. If you want to be considered a Russian patriot, you have to express certainty that Russian troops did nothing wrong in Bucha; that Russia didn’t shoot down Malaysia Airlines Flight 17; that Russians and Ukrainians are “one people”; that Moscow should capture Kyiv; and, now, that there’s no doubt about a “Ukraine connection” to the Crocus attack. 

Supporting the “Ukraine connection” theory as confidently and loudly as possible amounts to a demonstration of loyalty to “our own” and hatred of the enemy against whom “we” have united. That’s why convincing evidence of Ukraine’s involvement is unnecessary and no counterargument is effective. No one is even asking how organizing the attack would benefit Ukraine — the country has long since been cast in the role of infernal evil.

Even public displays of grief for the victims of the Crocus attack have become demonstrations of loyalty. Public officials were reportedly instructed to lay flowers at memorials in the days after the attack — this kind of enforced public grieving is a first in Putin’s Russia. The private sector has undertaken analogous shows of solidarity, like writing off victims’ debts. The Crocus City Hall attack presents an ideal opportunity for public and private sector workers alike to show that they support “their own” because, in this case, they don’t have to identify with a war of aggression to do so.

What the Putin administration needs most is public buy-in for its war on Ukraine. Much of its current rhetoric — from complaints about the “collective West” to outlawing “LGBT propaganda” — has become part of a campaign to generate consent for a senseless invasion, just as the invasion itself is framed as the “logical” answer to those “threats.” 

There is little evidence that the attack on Crocus City Hall was the work either of Kyiv or of Moscow itself. It seems likely, instead, to have its roots in other issues, like Russia’s colonial past, its involvement in wars in Chechnya and Syria, and its treatment of Muslim communities within its borders. But those who believe it was an inside job are right about one thing: the deadly tragedy has become a convenient way for the Kremlin to stir up fear and suspicion about Ukraine, while exploiting a difficult period in Russia’s recent past to rally people around its brutal present-day policies.