#working out and shaving constantly and being strict about eating

[cas---2y5]

siri tell me where I can get a fucking grip

[old-hyper-super-clover]

For the requests‚ what about a family trip to the beach with Purgatory Hall + the royals and MC? Like Simeon and Barbatos setting up a picnic table meanwhile MC and Luke play around in the sand searching for shiny or strange things to building a sand castle (everything also keeping Solomon and Diavolo far from the preparations for the picnic)‚ playing with water guns or swimming. And after eating maybe playing a match of volleyball sand, admiring the sunset till it's nigth time and before going back‚ playing with fireworks, do a little stargazing or something--

Feel free to ignore this and thanks in advance anyway~

FINALLY I've come to write something for this lovely request. It's packed with so many fun ideas that I kinda went overboard with it xD this means the story is so big I'll have to split it into two posts!

To Bisshitu: I wanted to thank you for your continuous support! I see you in my notifs a lot and I really appreciate it!! (ALSO I AM SO SORRY YOU'VE WAITED SO LONG I HOPE YOU WILL STILL ENJOY THIS CHAOS)

Literally just 13 idiots on a beach trip~

Part 1

MC was leaning against one of the walls in the giant entrance halls of the House of Lamentation. Standing next to them, Solomon handed MC an opened bag of spicy newt chips. "Want some?" He asked and MC gladly took a few while constantly watching the commotion that was going on in the rest of the hallway.

Who would've guessed that going on a vacation with the seven rulers of hell would involve the most panicked, loud and chaotic packing of bags to have ever existed?

Well, let's be real, MC did expect it, but maybe not to the degree that they were in amusement about now.

The oldest brother had called the others for a "luggage check" as he had been sceptical of his brothers' talents in packing reasonable items in an, likewise reasonable, amount of suitcases and bags.

And of course, the first one to show up had to present his luggage in the form of... nothing.

Yes, Beelzebub came up to Lucifer, only the remains of a sandwich in his hand (which didn't last longer than three more seconds), confused when Lucifer mustered him with an angered glance.

"Where's your luggage?" Lucifer asked, to which Beel only gave a shrug.

"We're going to the beach, right? Which means I'll only need my swimming trunks, and I wear those underneath my pants."

Now the confusion has wandered over to rest on Lucifer's face. "But... Won't you need clothes to change into, or at least pyjamas for the night?"

"Hm..." Beel scratched the back of his head while thinking about Lucifer's words. "Nah, I don't need those. I'm planning to stay at the beach all the time, so..." Then suddenly, he gasped as he remembered something. "Wait, I do have something else prepared to bring along!"

Beel reached into his pocket, and when he pulled out a hand-written list that unrolled itself, plonking onto the carpet and rolling all the way to Lucifer's feet, the avatar of Pride knew exactly what said list was going to be.

"There are a few food stands that I'd like to try out..." Beel announced, eyeing the paper. "First of all, there's one selling shaved ice, which I want to compare to the ice-cream from this other stand, but who's also selling parfaits of which I kind of want to try all twenty-five flavours... Also then there's of course-"

"Beel" Lucifer interrupted the avatar of Gluttony in a strict tone. "Go pack a proper bag."

"But-"

"Now."

Letting out a sigh, Lucifer watched as Beel left.

But little did he know, this had only been the beginning of the chaos...

Moments later, Lucifer has found himself explaining to Satan why taking 70 different books with him would be ridiculously much. Also Mammon had taken this opportunity to "lend" some of his brothers possessions, arguing that he "needed those for the beach". This had worked until his swift fingers touched Levi's limited edition Ruri-chan sunscreen.

So, as Lucifer was spam-calling Belphie to wake him up and finally have him start packing, a sudden argument could be heard from upstairs:

"... How dare you steal my precious Hana Ruri 'magical sun ray protective lotion for all blooming heroes of justice'?! This very sunscreen is an homage to the legendary beach episode where Azuki-tan got a sunburn and couldn't help Ruri-chan in the intense battle against the evil kelp-army that was threatening to overgrow the local reef-"

"OKAY OKAY, HERE'S YOUR STUPID CREAM NOW LEAVE ME ALONE"

"S-STUPID CREAM?!?! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW PRECIOUS THIS ITEM IS TO A FAN LIKE-"

That was all Lucifer could understand as an awfully annoyed scream Mammon let out was drowning Levi's gibberish. Rubbing the bridge of his nose, Lucifer knew this vacation was going to be one intense experience...

An hour later, the group found itself where this little story had started off. The Purgatory Hall crew had already arrived long ago, enjoying the chaos together with MC -- who, btw, had been the only one to pass Lucifer's vibe luggage check right away.

Slowly it felt like most of the brothers were ready to go, only Asmodeus was left in the judgemental glare of the avatar of Pride.

But Lucifer noticed they already were way behind the time they were supposed to meet Diavolo at his castle. So, to Asmo's luck, he let off of trying to see what's inside the pretty boy's suitcase and announced the group's departure.

In enthusiasm shared by almost everyone, they let out a big cheer:

"Off to the beach we go!"

Some of the demons had whined about wanting to visit the human world beach. But as those idiot boys literally couldn't be trusted to act responsibly (which is okay, we love them regardless), Diavolo offered to stay at the beach resort he created in the Devildom.

Looking over the endless ocean, surrounded by the equally large beach and glistening in an artificial sun's light, MC was wondering just how powerful the demon prince must be to have created all this. But they were left only little time to be in awe over the location, as their friends demanded their attention shortly after having arrived.

Without going into much detail -- the day was packed with lots and lots of fun. MC was running around the beach, playing and goofing around with their friends, only to take a collective rest and then go do something silly again. Only a few other demons were to be found at the resort, but those were some acquaintances of Diavolo's family, and the group seemed to have scared them off of the beach after, like, an hour or so. Hence, the whole beach served as their playground for whatever activity they wanted to do, until in the afternoon, most of them were about to collapse from exhaustion and hunger.

"That's right, we didn't really have a proper meal since coming here" Asmo noticed as several tummy grumbles undermined his statement.

"We DID bring a picnic basket..." Satan mumbled. "But some genius had to let Beel carry it."

The culprit gave an immediate pout. "I had to hurry, 'kay?!" Mammon huffed. "MC was already at the beach and I--" he stopped. "... U-uh... I mean..."

Gaining a round of sighs and shaking heads, his brothers however decided to let Mammon's... mammon-ness slide for once. Mostly because, approaching from the distance, Barbatos and Solomon were getting closer, their hands full with bags that seemed to be stuffed with food.

"Y-yoU BroUGhT S-nAcKs?!" Beelzebub was already on his feet running towards them but Barbatos' stare was actually enough to make him stop.

"Not before the dishes are prepared, Beelzebub" Barbatos explained calmly, but with this very weird hidden tone in his voice that gave everyone chills despite the scorching summer heat.

"We figured everyone must be starving by now, so Barbatos suggested we'd make a little picnic party with everyone" Solomon cheered, presenting the bags in his hands.

"That sounds lovely" Simeon could be heard among the general noise of approval. "Let me help you prepare everything, Barbatos."

The demon butler beamed him a smile, thanking the angel for his help.

Then, Solomon spoke up again, and every bit of joy vanished from all their faces: "Thank you, Simeon! With the three of us working together the food will be ready in no time!"

--------------

Barbatos was putting all kinds of spices into a bowl to create a delicious sauce. Right next to him, Simeon prepared mouth-watering sandwiches.

And behind their back, there was this chopping sound. Chop reaching their chop ears in an chop never- chop ending thread, over and chop over again...

Swallowing his tension, Simeon was fighting a frown. "He's only cutting the fruits..." He whispered. "You shouldn't be able to mess up a fruit salad..."

"I know" Barbatos mumbled back. "However I cannot fight this unease that urges me to check if he's really-" He was interrupted by a very unsettling "oops" coming from that certain sorcerer at the cutting board.

In honestly quicker than the blink of an eye Simeon and Barbatos were at Solomon's side, frantically scanning the table for whatever Solomon must've messed up. When all they found were slices of fruit that, well, might have been chopped a bit wonky, they gave Solomon a confused stare.

"I cut off too much of this poor Hellberry's pull" Solomon explained. "Oh well, I'll just cut around the stem and add it to the fruit salad like this."

Both Barbatos and Simeon couldn't help but stare for a moment longer, their brains not really comprehending NOT finding an abomination in Solomon's cooking.

"Can I help you two with anything?" The sorcerer then asked.

"U-uhm, no..." Simeon mumbled. "It's all fine, we just..."

"We wanted to see if there's anything we can help you with" Barbatos jumped in to continue.

"Thanks, but I'm fine. Actually I'm almost finished, so maybe I can help one of you afterw-"

"Nononononono...!" Simeon almost whined. "I-its fine! We're actually almost finished ourselves, so..."

Solomon looked back, raising an eyebrow. "Doesn't look like it to me..."

Suddenly, another voice joined the group.

"I agree! You two are likely just being humble again" Diavolo had walked up to their working station a moment ago, but neither of them seemed to have noticed in their stress. The prince continued: "That's why I decided to lend you a hand as well. This is a vacation for all of us, so I should not burden my loyal butler with all the work."

"That's a commendable attitude for royalty like yourself" Solomon cheered. "Well then, I think Simeon and Barbatos could use a hand."

Diavolo was already squeezing his quite broad body into the tiny cooking space, this certain over-excited sparkle in his eyes as he mustered the food.

Barbatos and Simeon on the other hand were exchanging glances, so immensely stressed that their thoughts were almost audible:

'Barbatos I don't think I can handle any more of this stress' Simeon stared.

'We shouldn't have let Solomon help in the first place, our kindness was foolish' Barbatos stared back.

'What do we do now Barbatos this is the only food we have left, they cannot ruin it'

Thankfully, the perfect butler was not planning to let their "help" threaten the food for any longer. "Young master, I highly appreciate that you thought of my well-being. Which is why I indeed have a request for you and Solomon."

Simeon almost barged in on a frightened impulse, but Barbatos continued before anyone could raise their voice. "There is dessert stored in our hotel's main storage. Would you be so kind and bring enough for our whole group?"

A little surprised, Diavolo agreed. He waited for Solomon to finish cutting the fruits, then they went off to the hotel.

Finally able to catch a breath, Simeon shot Barbatos a last glance. "That was easier than expected. Why didn't we let Solomon bring the desserts earlier?"

Back to mixing spices, Barbatos didn't look up at the question. "What desserts?" He simply asked.

"... Uhm..." Simeon was quite startled. "Are there... Are there no desserts in the storage room...?"

"Oh, I sure hope there are" Barbatos said. "Otherwise I will have some explaining to do..."

-------------

(To be continued...)

Find my summer event Masterlist and Rules for the requests here <3

[fucker-anon]

Puppeteer Headcanons

K so this mans has been living in my head rent free since I first laid eyes on them (like 2013) so here are my headcanons about their backstories, personalities, and more. Some are inspired by the original stories and lore, some are inspired by other bloggers, some are me self-projecting. Warning there are mentions of dark themes so keep caution. Also i am not a writer, (im sorry) @creepy-bi-day enjoy!!

Puppeteer~

Backstory: 

Puppeteer was born as Jonathon Blake on July 23, 1974

Mother was Hispanic, dad was American. He grew up speaking Spanish and English. He also never really got along with both sides of the family cause he’s mixed (they didn’t like that). They kinda preferred his siblings.

had 4 younger siblings (3 girls, 1 boy). He was 4 years older than the second child.

ever since he could walk he was obsessed with musical theater. For a while his family was able to Johnny to theater camp. Stopped after the 3rd child was born due to financial reasons

parents were working full time to take care of their family. meant Johnny was basically acting like a 3rd parent. good news was he was able to take care of all 4 of them and meet their basic need of being fed, staying clean etc. bad news it meant that he was taking care of them 24/7 and was constantly tired and not taking care of himself. Started to develop symptoms of depression, but couldn’t get help due to the stigmas around mental health + he’s a guy.

got worse in highschool when his work load increased and he wanted to do more in drama and music but couldn’t cause he had to take care of his siblings. He also didn’t make many close friends except for one girl in his drama class Erma. 

Erma was his best friend and they started dating in their second year of highschool. She helped him as much as she could with his mental health, their studies, and even helped babysit some days. They brought out the best in each other. 

Erma loved dance and wanted to become a ballerina, but her parents tried to keep her focus on studies. They did allow her to take theater which she also loved. Her parents were very strict and controlling so she had to hid her relationship.

It wasn’t until the second child turned 13 (johnny was 17), when she started to help out more with the other three siblings (12f, 9f, 7m). Thanks to her help and now they were in a better financial position, johnny was able to join plays and bands which had afterschool practices.

He was really good. He discovered he was born with perfect pitch and was able to get the lead in a play in his final year. This was also when he was able to score a scholarship so some of his uni fees would be paid for.

he decided to major in theater and wanted to go on Broadway or at least become a drama teacher

however when apply for uni, Erma’s parents discovered their relationship and they offered Erma a choice, break up with johnny or else they wouldn’t pay for Erma’s schooling. They hated johnny mostly due to racism and the fact that he wasnt going into a “stable career”. Erma choose to break up with Johnny but didn’t want to tell him these reasons cause she knew that it would upset him. So instead she told him that she’s fallen out of love and wanted to break up.

Johnny agreed mostly to make her happy, but this started his spiral downwards.

Johnny didn’t have any friends other than Erma, he also went to uni in a different city so he didn’t have his family there. His depression got really bad, and he ended up isolating himself and failing first term. He decided to kill himself via hanging. Problem is he wasn't heavy enough to kill himself right away, so he was suffering for hours. 

He spent his last few hours allowing himself to finally “be selfish” and allowed himself to be angry at his family, Erma, and his overall life.

due to this anger, he was able to come back as a ghost, wanting others to feel the same pain as him.

when he came back he was able to change his body into his idea of a perfect vessel, some improvement were making himself taller, better hair, clear face, smooth voice, bigger dick.  and now feeds off of negative energy

Personality:

cold-hearted, cunning, manipulative, a smooth talking, somewhat charming. this is the very carefully crafted version of Puppeteer, He’s the guy who could talk you into doing anything, mostly stuff like jumping off a bridge

however once you get close to him, you see more of Johnathon than puppet. He is very protective of his close friends, will fuss over them and scold them if they aren’t taking care of themselves

good luck getting there tho. After Erma he really had a hard time opening up to ppl due to his fear that they will all leave him at one point. 

Powers:

he feeds off of negative energies, the more trauma the better (finally imma a snack), so he usually influences his victims into a deep depressed state where they off themselves. However once he started hanging out with the creeps (mansion au), he really didn’t need to do that since everyone is a lil fucked up. He just feeds off a little bit of everyone, so that no one is really affected. At this point, he probably has enough energy to outlive the fucking queen

He’s a ghost so he can levitate at most like 10 m above the ground, and if he focuses, he can go through walls and become invisible. 

he has golden strings due to the ectoplasm inside of him (make his eyes and mouth glow to). This strings are like limbs, They are tough to break but if you do its gonna hurt him a lot. They can extend up to 60 ft, and are about 1 cm thick. 

Fun Facts (cause idk how to categorize these)

lots of trauma, need therapy. he feels a lot of shame for what happened and only opens up to his very close friends. again born in 70′s, theres the toxic masculinity and some internalized homophobia. 

still a theater kid!! love musicals and can still sing and play guitar. His vocal cords are a lil more sensitive cause the whole hanging thing, but as long as he warms up, can has the range baby. also has Macbeth memorized

can still cook. while he doesn’t like his past and doesn’t need to eat. He wrote down all of the recipes he knew and will sometimes make them again

dick is 6.5 inchs soft 7.5 hard, i know y’all wanted to know. if also like 6′2 tall. tall big boi

i hc him as pansexual. yea he rather died again than admit that he loves someone, but he won’t care about gender. he still is cis tho.

he does fuck. not often but occasionally. slightly lower sex drive than average 

grunge king. he grew up in poverty and he great at diy. very leans more punk grunge but can be soft grunge depending on his mood. love beanies and his hair is a little longer than chin length with lots of layers. He is tempted to shave off the sides of his head tho. also has grunge and punk music on his playlists.

bad with tech. like the opposite of ben. gets called an old man since he couldn’t figure out how the tv remote works.

he doesn’t grow facial hair, doesn’t like the look.

acts like he’s too proper to cuss, but he does.... a lot

experienced some racism while growing up so he does say ACAB

probably has some piercings or tattoos or both 

still is depressed, has some tough days, but doctor ej gets him pills to help and he has a good support system

shit this was a lot so Helen is next with another post. ill get into their friendship and relationships with other in a whole new post if yall like it. someone tell me if this gives joy cause i could write an essay on this man

[mythgirlimagines]

Time for a brand new talentswap for this fine Tuesday! Give a warm wink and a smile to Myth, the Former Ultimate Animator!

——————————————————-

BACKSTORY AND TALENT

As a youngster, Myth‘s imagination and energy was all over the place. A combination of regular consumption of books, movies, and TV, and living in a rather creative household herself, made this Myth want to bring her odd creations into the human world. Ever since she entered her first ever short animation into a prestigious film festival for preteens, she has been on a roll ever since, with romantic and fantasy anime being her main bread and butter. Her most well-known work yet is “Up in Smoke”, a Romeo and Juliet-esque animated film chronicling the romantic escapades of a two female elemental spirits, a water and fire spirit, and the rebellion against their strict family. It earned raving reviews from critics for its adorable artstyle, its loveable characters, and its heartwarming portrayal of LGBT dynamics. In fact, most of her works have at least one LGBT character, or at least have some form of LGBT subtext. She may not have a lot of human friends apart from Wyre, but she has the support of both her friends and her massive fanbase. Even as a adult, she still has it going in the animation department. 

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RELATIONSHIPS

Wyre Anon, Former Ultimate Animal Breeder

Due to her wild and rowdy appearance and personality, Wyre never really had many human friends, but they compensate for this with a whole arkload of animal friends, with lizards, snakes and other reptiles being her main speciality. Myth and Wyre met as children, and quickly bonded with each other over their eccentric behaviour and lack of human friends. In fact, Wyre was the one who gave Myth the eared hat and tail that Myth regularly wears. Wyre regularly brings in live animals as a drawing reference, so Myth would learn how to properly animate animal movement. 

Outfit: Same outfit as the original, but with a cat design on the skirt, a brown fox ear headband, and a matching brown prop tail. 

Anon Scar, Ultimate Princess

As the princess of a small European country called Zunduros, Scar is the current heiress to the Zundorian throne. Myth was surprised to learn that her animated shows have quite the following in Scar’s kingdom. Despite constantly carrying herself as the “Heiress of the Untouched Shadow”, the facade quickly breaks away to reveal a heavily-concerned and somewhat maternal girl, once she realises that this entertainment giant doesn’t exactly have the healthiest living habits. Nowadays, Scar is always on standby, making sure that Myth gets her daily food and rest. 

Outfit: A black Gothic Lolita-style dress, with white lace and red bows on the front, dark red stockings, red heels, red gloves, a red rose holding up her side bun.

Fusion Anon, Ultimate Musician

As the lead singer of the soft rock band, “QUIZ BOWL”, Fusion’s songs mainly center around family and parental love. Fusion’s personality matches the subject matter of his songs, being paternal and kind-hearted, despite what his height and wild fashion would suggest. Imagine Myth’s shock when this 6’3 tall boy with a large afro dyed various colors and a leather jacket claimed to be a massive fan of her adorable animated films. Ever since Myth found out and gave him an autographed art book, Fusion has been in special interest heaven. Nowadays, Fusion helps compose music for Myth’s animated films. 

Outfit: A large afro dyed various colors, a black leather jacket with an autistic pride badge on the front over a red t-shirt, black leather gloves, ripped black pants, black boots, a guitar case strapped to his back, color contacts. 

Fusion Anon II, Ultimate Photographer

As the girl behind the famous photography blog ,“bustasnap”, Fusion II has traveled all over the world to take pictures of all the scenic landscapes she can find. Upon looking at Fusion II’s photos, Myth knew that she had to use them for background references. This has led to the mysterious disappearance of many of Fusion II’s printed Polaroids. Upon finding out that Myth was the one behind the theft of her pictures, Fusion II chose to print the pictures and hand the copies to Myth. From there, Myth learned that Fusion II is a kind girl underneath her sarcastic and flippant demeanour.

Outfit: Same outfit as her original design, but with her prized Polaroid strapped to her right side. 

Just Anon, Ultimate Gamer

Dominating popular MMORPG after popular MMORPG under the name, “anon.”, Janon spends all of his time laying down and not moving from his territory. Despite Janon’s adorable appearance and fashion sense, Janon is foul-mouthed, cynical, and hates just about everybody in this goddamn con. Well, almost everybody. He has a massive soft spot for the two Jr. Ultimates of the convention. Janon and Myth like to organize little slumber parties and nap underneath a large pile of blankets, pillows and stuffed toys, where certain bothersome Anons wouldn’t bother them.  

Outfit: A Pikachu hoodie, black headphones with the Overwatch logo on each ear, formal wear and face-mask from original design.

Sparkle Anon, Former Ultimate Traditional Dancer

Coming from a long and prestigious line of traditional dancers, Sparkle’s dancing is truly a spectacle to witness on stage. Spicing up her dance moves with glitter and sakura petals, Sparkle’s moves look like they’re straight from a high-budget fantasy movie. Topping off her stellar appearance is a loud and bombastic attitude that truly shines on stage. Just like with Fusion, Sparkle is also a major fan of Myth’s works, particularly her magical girl series. Myth regularly watches Sparkle perform in order to help with animating dancing and the movement of her characters. 

Outfit: An orange kimono with pink flower designs all over it, a purple obi, white socks, brown gets sandals, a sidetail decorated with flowers, glasses from original design. 

Egg Anon, Former Ultimate Lucky Student, and Wet Sock, Former Ultimate Yakuza

Originally the twin children to one of the biggest underground yakuza chains in the world, Egg has since been cast out of the bloodline for their unpredictable luck cycle managed to nearly doom their entire bloodline, and it’s only through Wet Sock‘s control that the entire bloodline didn’t go kaput. Upon hearing about Egg and Wet Sock’s backstory, Myth thought that this would make a good premise for a film. Needless to say, despite their cursed and violent concepts, Myth managed to look past them, to find deeply disturbed individuals that just need a hug. 

Egg’s Outfit: A bandaged left eye, a half-shaved haircut, the same same clothes from their original design, but with a clover design replacing the bird designs. 

Wet Sock’s Outfit: An eyepatch on their right eye, a half-shaved haircut, a black suit just like Fuyuhiko’s.

Curious Anon, Jr. Ultimate Nurse

As the adopted child of a hospital worker, Curious ended up learning everything that they can about the medical field and the human body. Curious has became famous and beloved at the hospital for their kind-hearted and levelheaded personality, as well as their excellent bedside vigil. Because of Myth’s constant neglect of food and sleep, Curious is constantly on standby to make sure that Myth gets the proper amount of nutrition needed to function as a proper human being. Myth may not need Curious constantly hovering over her, but she appreciates Curi’s concern for her. 

Outfit: Part of their hair tied into a small ponytail, a mint green face mask, same outfit from original design, but with a white apron with a red cross design on the front, and mint green scrubs.

Anon Nerd, Former Ultimate Mechanic

Famous for his uncontrollable temper and strength, as well as his equal caliber intelligence, Anon Nerd is known for making functional machines out of literal garbage. Unfortunately, Nerd’s entire attitude doesn’t exactly make him a massive hit with other people at his mechanics store. Despite Nerd’s own workaholic tendencies, Myth just makes Nerd so angry with her blatant disregard for her own health. Nerd regularly tries to get this adorable animator to get her eyes off her drawing tablet and just go to sleep, even if it means knocking her out with a wrench. 

Outfit: Ruffled-up hair, grease stains all over his body, a black and yellow jumpsuit, black and yellow boots and gloves, scouter from original design. 

Eldritch Anon, Ultimate Team Manager

Despite Eldritch‘s jittery and paranoid behavior in public, Eldritch is unbelievably confident when it comes to leading a group. Eldritch is the number one trainer in “Fort Ritchie‘s Boot Camp”, a training center that trains children to take on the inevitable zombie apocalypse. Ignoring the whole “apocalypse” pretense, Eldritch is really good at motivating individuals to take action. Upon witnessing Myth’s poor health, Eldritch has taken it upon himself to prevent Myth from becoming zombie bait, but Myth really doesn’t want to exercise, and seems content with being zombie chow. 

Dream Anon, Ultimate Chef

As the daughter of a professional TV chef, Dream can cook healthy meals to feed all her teammates on her volleyball team. Dream is famous for being just a big bundle of joy and sunshine, as well as her energetic and overzealous attitude when it comes to cooking. Dream has taken upon herself to cook Myth only the best of meals, in order to make Myth actually drop her work to go eat with all the others. Don’t get Dream wrong, she does enjoy a lot of Myth’s works, particularly her shonen works. But would it kill Myth to eat something with actual nutritional value?

Outfit: A white chef uniform, a pink bandana tied over her head, a pink ascot, shoes from original design. 

Iris Anon, Reserve Course Student

When you first meet up with Iris, the first thing you would notice about her is her insane clumsiness and her almost stupidly optimistic viewpoint. Despite first impressions, Iris actually managed to get into Hope’s Peak Middle School’s reserve course on academic prowess alone, which makes her a veritable genius. Despite not even having an actual talent, Iris doesn’t let that, or the horrible quality of the Reserve Course get her down. Iris watched a bunch of Myth’s anime with her girlfriend, and she is currently overjoyed to be spending the con visit with the girl behind all those masterpieces. 

Outfit: A white dress shirt, a red bowtie, a dark blue skirt, white knee-length socks, black slip-on shoes, bandages on her arms and legs, glasses, star clip, and braids from original design.

Purple Anon, Ultimate Swordswoman

As the daughter of an ancient lineage of sword fighters, Purple has been taught the art of the blade by her elders, and yet she manages to surpass them all in blade-to-blade combat. Purple is hardly ever seen without her trusty claymore strapped to her back. Despite what her talent would suggest, Purple is very timid and cowardly, thanks to her sheltered upbringing. Because of her sheltered and old-fashioned upbringing, Purple also speaks in very antiquated vocabulary that is hard to understand. Myth may not understand a word that Purple is saying, but Purple would make a great fantasy protagonist. 

Outfit: A black headband, gakuran top, a long purple skirt, lilac stockings, black slip-on shoes, a purple scabbard on her back that holds her claymore.

This series centers around this adorable animator who is unhealthily attached to her work, as the people around her show massive concern for both her and her health. 

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PERSONALITY

Ever since she was a child, Animator!Myth has always been into the arts and a very creative soul. Her imagination is all over the place, which helps her with her works. Aside from that, Animator!Myth is also kind-hearted and happy to lend a helping hand to people who needs it. Unfortunately, Animator!Myth has a little bit gaping flaw in her personality: she is a MASSIVE workaholic. Not wanting to let down her loyal fanbase, Animator!Myth works day and night on her animated works, much to the understandable concern of her family and friends. This unfortunately means she goes for days on end without stopping for a snack or nap break, making this already childish and loopy girl somehow even more childish and loopy. Her friends are trying their best to teach Myth that overexerting yourself is no good, and taking constant breaks is the key to success. 

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APPEARANCE

Animator!Myth is bespectacled and slightly chubby. Myth‘s undyed hair goes down to her shoulders. As for her clothes, on her head, Myth wears a fuzzy blue hat with ears, an ahoge, and brown stripes. Myth wears an oversized blue jacket with yellow details, that holds an animator’s tablet in one of the pockets, over a pink shirt. She also wears a red skirt, black stockings, and yellow rainboots with a paw print design on the bottom. Clipped to the bottom of her skirt is a tail that matches the hat she wears.  ——————————————————-

Well, now that I have finished this week’s talentswap, let me know what you think! In the meantime, have fun and be merry!

-Fusion Anon

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It would be so awesome to be an animator! I love this talentswap!

[wedreamedlove]

Bai Qi - Character Study

Archiving another post from Reddit. This one is more outdated...

This post was supposed to unleash my ode to Bai Qi, my one true love, onto the world though LOL.

Spoilers include up to Chapter 15. Plus calls, dates, and ASMR in CN server. Still using JP and CN as sources here because of Elex's translation issues.

I want to start this post off by saying that I disagree with Bai Qi's archetype being a "bad boy". If anything, he's just a lone wolf or maverick. Putting aside how there's another character that fits being a bad boy to a T, the common points of a bad boy archetype are:

exudes confidence, and allows his interests to take priority

moody and paradoxical, making him hard to understand

displays an attitude, has an edge, gives girls a vicious thrill

rebel with or without a cause

likely engages in dangerous hobbies

I don't know about you guys, but Bai Qi is REALLY simple. He has basically two goals in life: upholding (mostly conventional) justice and caring for the MC (who he has devoted his life to).

He's not rebellious for the sake of sticking it to the world, he just has his own views on how justice should be carried out (and it's still on the side of light; he's not a vigilante). Maybe his motorcycle is a dangerous hobby, except he always ensures MC is safe when riding with him. Honestly, this guy is so far from being a bad boy LOL.

Heck, even the other common trope of a bad boy having a painful past that is the reason behind their nasty attitude doesn't apply to Bai Qi because he confronts his painful past and gets over it (with the MC's help) before she even officially meets him.

CHIVALRY? CHAUVINIST?

First, let's tackle the big issue: the "sexist" things Bai Qi might say. It's an inescapable fact that this game is an Asian game and (given Elex's confusion over what to localize and how you can only change the base so much) this seeps through, so there are heavily gendered concepts.

However, it should also be noted that these games for women are usually made by women in the industry. Yes, there's internalized misogyny but this isn't it here.

Coming back to Bai Qi, you have to realize that he comes from a strict military family: his father is a lieutenant general [Campus Date] and was extremely harsh, meanwhile Bai Qi describes his mother as gentle and someone who cried in the shadows for him whenever his father went off on him [Seize: Sad Thoughts Call]. It paints the image of his mother being a dodder flower, the classic housewife.

Then, after his mother's death in high school when he was 15 years old [CN Character Profile], he went to join the special forces. Undoubtedly, this was another environment where he's surrounded by men and military ideals. And yet, through all of this, not only does he keep his own idea of justice, but he comes out WITHOUT looking down at women.

"Bai Qi is excellent and one day he will be the "sharp blade" of the special forces. The only pity is that he is too attached to the justice in his own heart, and he's blinded his own eyes. But at the same time I am looking forward to what direction his convictions will take him to." - Commander Leto

[CN Character Profile]

Gavin's character type is being the quintessential male.

But he's completely supportive of MC's work, helps her out with her production shows, and sends her to and from work whenever he has the time. He never disparages her work.

In [Seize: Sad Thoughts Call], there is a point where MC tells him that she'll always be by his side and he can rely on her. Bai Qi chuckles through his tears (ZHANG JIE! YOUR VOICE!!) and says "Silly, I'm a man. You should leave these sort of words to me. But, hearing you say this, makes me really happy."

I think it's doing Bai Qi a disservice to think he's being sexist here. Perhaps, you can feel sorry that this sort of standard of masculinity is something he upholds but I'd argue that he was making a joke to break up the heavy mood and he doesn't say ANYTHING about her not being allowed to say that. Instead, he's actually happy to hear that from her. He openly shows his emotions to her here about his past and sorrow. Again, considering his military upbringing and his mother, it's probably engraved in his bones to do his best to take care of his loved ones.

Look, some people just have dominant personalities and Bai Qi is one of them. He's probably one of the closest of the men to being classically masculine, but the way he's an enormous puppy for the MC breaks him out of the stereotype. (Like how Victor is the classical CEO, but his Souvenir side breaks him out of that stereotype).

Going along with, what I'd call his chivalrous (NOT chauvinist) attitude, is how natural his actions are in taking care of the MC and being considerate of her.

In [Photoshoot 5-7], MC drops her chopsticks and Bai Qi picks it up, gives her his, and wipes hers off before using it to eat.

In [Main Story 12-13], Bai Qi shows up on his motorcycle and passes her a pastel-colored helmet. Meaning that, not only did he consider her safety, but he also went out of his way to pick a color that he thought would suit her.

In [Wish Date], MC drops a plate and it shatters but just as she bends down to clean it up Bai Qi picks her up and moves her away.

In [Warm Palms ASMR], Bai Qi keeps MC comfort by sitting beside the bed on the ground to look over his documents. He doesn't assume he can just get on the bed and actually double-checks before he does.

In [Gentle Touch CN ASMR] Bai Qi is concerned about MC getting tired from standing on tiptoes to help him shave and tells her to stand on his feet. Later, he boosts her up onto the sink counter.

TRACKING BRACELET; PROTECTIVENESS

Tackling the second big issue: the tracking bracelet and Bai Qi's "overprotectiveness". Honestly, if anyone is overprotective in this game though it's definitely Li Zeyan LOL. Bai Qi may take second place, but that's still far below Li Zeyan.

Anyway, addressing the tracking bracelet first, I think it's interesting that, after Bai Qi gives MC the tracking bracelet in Chapter 2 and the events happen, he gives MC the [CH2 Story Call: Tracking Bracelet] and there he asks MC if she's at home. I don't know how the English version did it but in Chinese, after MC reminds him that he sent her home just an hour ago and did he forget, you hear him clear his throat awkwardly and then he says "Oh, I was just making sure. Don't go out anymore tonight." Hm, wouldn't he know she was at home already if he was using the tracking?

In [CH5 Story Call: Production Show Investigation] Bai Qi calls and asks "Are you home yet?". Hey, again, wouldn't he know if he was tracking her? He knows MC went to the orphanage and implies that he knows she went there because of the bracelet. But here's another thought: he was clearly investigating the old orphanage because he appears there later in Chapter 6 to save MC. So, perhaps he and the special forces already had surveillance on the old orphanage and the surrounding area.

In [Main Story 12-18] Bai Qi hears that MC is in the hotel and panics and asks the reception for her. If he was using the tracking bracelet, wouldn't he know exactly where she is? For something that everyone feels like he's violating MC's privacy with, he barely seems to use it for its actual function LOL.

It happens again in [Starry Date], although you can argue dates might be different, but MC pranks him in a call and, at the end, he asks her for the address of the karaoke place she's at so he can pick her up. If he was tracking her he wouldn't need to ask the address now, would he? She's definitely wearing the bracelet in dates because in [Trio Date] Bai Qi reminds her to have the bracelet on.

On a side note, I also find it interesting that he never FORCES the MC to wear the bracelet. In [Main Story 12-11] in Chinese he strokes the bracelet gently and then says "Remember to wear it". It's always said as a suggestion, as if he thinks that she does take it off at times but he doesn't press her to constantly wear it.

In [Main Story 15-4], Bai Qi reveals that even without the bracelet he can still find MC so it's not a tracking bracelet. I'm sure he thought implying that was the only way for him to give her that bracelet.

Now, regarding his protectiveness, he doesn't actually limit or cage the MC in anyway:

In [CH5 Story Call: Production Show Investigation] he suggests for her to avoid the orphanage but considering they meet again in Chapter 6, he clearly didn't do anything to stop her.

In [Photoshoot 5-1] MC has to interview a criminal and Bai Qi is there to escort her, but he doesn't stop her from going to meet the man. Because she's working and he knows better than to interrupt her.

In [Follow-Up Date], I agree that MC did something crazy by following him in, but he doesn't freak out at her afterward. He scolds her and whatnot but then calms down.

In [Seize: About Film Studio Call] Bai Qi picks MC up and removes her out of the shooting location because a bomb threat was called in. But he apologizes immediately when he realizes what he did, recognizing he was wrong for doing that, and actively works with MC and includes her into evacuating the rest of her employees.

In [Main Story CH12] Bai Qi brings MC to the special forces base and gets her involved with everything he's investigating after he gets permission. Heck, even when there was that rogue soldier, he just shuffles the MC into a corner and then goes to subdue the person.

Actually, in [Main Story 12-11] MC notes that this is the first time Bai Qi has said she's "forbidden" from going outside. This is when things get really crazy and Evols are going out of control, so it's not a surprise he wants her to stay put while he investigates the hotel. But this also shows that all the times before Bai Qi has never said anything forceful to MC and has only ever advised her not to wander around recklessly.

None of these are actions of a person who is crazily overprotective. Someone like that (cough Li Zeyan cough, at least until he calms down) would have locked her up in a room and kept her ignorant so she doesn't get any thoughts to run off and investigate things. Bai Qi tries his hardest to grant her wishes, within reason, and tries to answer any questions she has as long as he's free to do so. (And hey, no one talks about Li Zeyan's SP guard detail or Luoluo being able to track her through surveillance cameras; Xu Mo already got attacked for this so I won't bring the poor man up LOL).

Look, despite Bai Qi's maverick attitude, he still is part of a military organization and needs to follow orders. It makes sense too considering his military upbringing and no doubt, as long as it's not outrageous or touches his bottom line (the MC and sacrificing lives), he'll obey orders.

His joining of the special forces symbolizes the difference of his justice compared to his father. He will not give up on someone for any reason. If a sacrifice is necessary, then he will choose to face it alone.

[CN Character Profile]

But, anyway, he is protective to a certain degree and it's understandable considering how alone he's been since 15 years old and how in [Seize: Sad Thoughts Call] Bai Qi reveals that he feels like everyone he gets close to leaves him in the end (the death of his mother, his younger brother, his father (before he threw this man into the garbage bin where he belongs)).

He's also probably seen a lot of deaths of his comrades in the special forces. Heck, in [Main Story 12-6] Guzheng talks about a mission where the only people who survived was him and Bai Qi, and him only because Bai Qi came and saved him.

So, now that he's reunited with his one and only love again, you bet he's going to try and protect her. Not only is it in his blood, with his military upbringing, but also because he's just that sort of person. A trustworthy man who is determined to protect his loved ones without any sacrifices (or taking on all the sacrifices onto his own body).

HIS ENTIRE BEING IS ATTUNED TO MC

Okay, now that we got all the ugly things out of the way, this section is just for me to gush about what a gigantic soft puppy Bai Qi is with the MC. He's a tough, indifferent, lone wolf police on the streets, but an enormous puppy in the sheets in front of the MC.

Catch me crying every time over this Bai Qi Wish Date art by Honey Dogs because that's what Bai Qi is constantly doing everywhere. EVERYWHERE.

Like the art above shows, in [Wish Date] Bai Qi uses his third wish to stand in the corner and watch MC as she prepares his birthday meal. He's just a puppy who wants to be as close as possible! Watching his loved one! There's amazing description about the gentle smile in his eyes.

In [Prank Date] Bai Qi catches MC's eyes immediately when she just looks over at him across the room.

In [Follow-Up Date] Bai Qi saw MC trying to give him something, before that policewoman came up and tried to give him food and scared off MC.

In [Main Story 12-13] Bai Qi is just standing outside but he spins around the moment MC comes out of her building as if he sensed her. His eyes also creases when he smiles at her.

In [Main Story 7-4] when MC bumps into Bai Qi at their school, she sees him just standing there with his hands in his pocket and quietly watching her. A smile surfaces in his eyes when they accidentally ask each other why the other is here at the same time and then he waits for her to continue first.

In [Makeup Challenge CN ASMR] Bai Qi reveals that he watches MC put on her makeup quite a bit. He doesn't get all the products right, and he doesn't know what they're all for, but he gets a gold star for trying LOL. I'm just imagining Honey Dog art again with him leaning against the bathroom door watching MC with heart eyes. But also, when he takes her into an area with more light to put on her makeup, he just spends some time looking into her eyes because they're pretty in the light.

In [His Fingertips CN ASMR] Bai Qi notices that MC has pierced her ears. She did it to match him and the affection in his sigh as he calls her silly. SOBS. He also decides to get her matching earrings as a gift next time instead of a bracelet. On another note, in his birthday stroll, MC and him end up getting her clip-on earrings. CUTE.

In [Gentle Touch CN ASMR] Bai Qi is again over the moon with seeing her at such a close distance when she's helping him shave. He's also a gigantic puppy nuzzling her hand when she checks her work by smoothing her palms across his jaw.

In [Caressing His Face CN ASMR] Bai Qi again reveals that he watches MC go about her bathroom rituals. He sees the skincare she puts on her skin and, although not knowledgeable, is totally game with letting her play by putting it on him. AGAIN, with the nuzzling, because her hands feel too nice.

Don't touch me I'm so tender for how concentrated Bai Qi's attention is on the MC whenever she's around. Honestly, the way he's so openly honest and genuine about his feelings for the MC is what strikes him out for the bad boy archetype.

SHORTCOMINGS

Anyway, to be fair, we have to look at some of Bai Qi's shortcomings and "flaws" now. Bai Qi isn't perfect. Heck, no one is, which is what makes these characters feel complex and developed. However, his shortcomings or flaws certainly don't make him a toxic person (or else, we'd all be toxic people with our idiosyncrasies that other people don't like, lol).

Bai Qi can be really rude to people who aren't the MC. Not to mention, he tends to resort to violence and threats to people he really, really doesn't care about.

In [Relieving Date] Bai Qi tells the people who were hitting on the MC to scram unless they want to be beaten to a pulp.

In [Slightly Drunken Date] Bai Qi tells the bassist to take his beer and leave if he doesn't want his arm broken.

In [Moments] I believe Bai Qi nearly threw (or did throw) Minor over his shoulder when he was touched on the back? Minor also, at one point, says that Bai Qi nearly punched him a few times or something?

Fortunately, he doesn't go overboard with his force. But I can totally see how some people wouldn't be impressed with someone who chooses violence as an answer or threat. I'm totally a-okay with this, but then again I think characters with body counts are attractive so I'm not one to speak about this being a positive thing LOL.

But, despite being rude, he knows when to draw a distinction and be professional. For example, in [Follow-Up Date], he treated the policewoman with the bare minimum courtesy, despite being indifferent. He chews her out for endangering people in the field, but he doesn't do anything more than that.

In [Campus Date], it's shown that he beat up and got beaten up in high school, although those people sounded like they were part of a gang, so it wasn't like they were upstanding citizens LOL. However, there was that kid who stole the cash register money and got beaten up by Bai Qi, who then took the money to spend on something he wanted. This surprised me since he ends up working with the police and special forces to uphold justice, but well I'll just paste a section in his profile here:

Bai Qi has many informant friends that belong in the gray zone, and he often breaks what's known as the rules of convention. He uses methods that don't look so "just" to achieve his goals. Because of this, there's many people who can't understand him and feel that his actions are inappropriate. Towards all these misunderstandings, Bai Qi doesn't bother to explain and doesn't care. Even if no one understands, he will use his own ways to protect his convictions.

[CN Character Profile]

He's not squeaky clean, but I'd say he still stands mostly on the morally upright side (cough maverick archetype cough). In fact, he's a huge proponent for the preciousness of life and I guess almost how everyone has an inherent worth in them, which is ironic considering how little he applies it to himself. But, hey, it's normal to have different standards for other people compared to yourself.

Anyway, moving on, Bai Qi's protectiveness over the MC CAN get the better of him, but he apologizes immediately. I mentioned it above already but in [Seize: About Film Studio Call] Bai Qi apologizes for his actions of forcibly removing the MC to protect her.

Continuing on, because I see it brought up, there's the opinion that Bai Qi lacks personality because he has no opinions when it comes to MC. I'm going to argue here that this focus is on the wrong thing.

Bai Qi has a LOT of opinions (such as how best to protect MC, etc.) but his personality is the type not to care about what he considers "small details" which is why he's content to let MC make the decisions on what to eat (because he has no strong preference for food) and do the things she finds fun.

Actually, in [Your Loving Eyes: The Best Gift Call] MC is trying to get Bai Qi a present, but he just says "Sure" to everything she suggests until MC chides him saying "Hey, why is everything good? When did you lose your opinion?". In Chinese, you can hear Bai Qi respond with a startled and amused "Really?". It's clear that he doesn't believe this is the case either.

It's completely fine for that not to be your thing (which is why we have three other eligible bachelors), but it's reading Bai Qi's character wrong to think this makes him have no personality.

You can even see in [Moments], that Bai Qi does arrange for some outings, such as taking MC out to the arcade to play games. He also suggests going to look at the stars a lot, because he's an astronomy boy.

Hobbies #2: Astronomy. He likes the stars, and once did some research on them. He also really enjoys soaring through the night sky, the feeling of looking up at the stars, and Jupiter.

[CN Character Profile]

However, despite this not being that big of a deal in my eyes, Bai Qi and MC do get development in this area which is what makes their relationship so nice. A HEALTHY RELATIONSHIP. Cough, sorry I had to get that out.

In [CN SSR Crisis: Art of Speaking Call] Bai Qi is taking MC out on a date and she is conflicted over what shoes to wear, the hair clip to use, and the purse to bring. She asks him for his opinion, but he keeps saying that they're all good, as long as she likes it. But MC gets annoyed and tells him that it sounds like he's being perfunctory and doesn't care.

This takes him aback and he hurriedly tells her that wasn't his intention. He genuinely thinks those things. But he realizes that she does want to hear his opinion, so he strives to give her a choice, even if it barely makes a difference for him because he thinks she looks good in everything. The two end up promising to not say any "sure" or "whatever" that day, so that they answer each other with an opinion.

In [SSR Heat up: Pretty Boy Call], you also see Bai Qi getting called out for answering "whatever" to everything. He immediately works to correct his opinion and says he'll wear whatever she picks.

Honestly, the reason he's so happy to go along with MC is explained in his [Mediterranean Date] where he literally says "The missed holidays, the dates I couldn't make, and the many times I had to disappear without being able to tell you... I've never had the time to make up for all of these things. So, no matter what we do, no matter where we go, as long as the person beside me is you, I won't have a single objection.".

Lastly, I think the real issue with Bai Qi is that he has a terrible sense of self-worth. It doesn't express itself in him being timid or not confident, but in the way he's reckless with his own health. ESPECIALLY when it comes to the MC.

In [Campus Date] there's a line that goes "She probably didn't know that her piano saved the youth who was about to fall into an abyss of darkness, and she had no way of knowing that this youth swore to protect her with his entire life". On one hand, romantic, on the other hand... oh boy, Bai Qi has really devoted his life to the MC and he's a man who doesn't change his stance once he decides on something, and here are some instances:

In [Endless Abyss: Beside You Call] Bai Qi comes back from a mission and decides to send MC to work. He just came back from a mission and hasn't slept for an entire day, but he wants to see her because she remarked on how they haven't seen each other for a while and he feels the same. HELLO? SIR PLEASE SLEEP.

In [Bleary Dawn CN ASMR] Bai Qi has two instances of this. First, he's cuddling in bed with MC and thinks about how he should get out and go for a morning jog, but he doesn't want to leave her. MC is worried he'll catch a cold in the rain, but he says he won't since it's a light drizzle. However, MC gets upset at that and you can hear the genuine apology in his voice when he realizes that she's worried about him.

Second instance, in [Bleary Dawn CN ASMR] is when they chat about whether Bai Qi has ever slept in. His family didn't allow that (SCREW HIS FATHER) and then he joined the military so even less so. He never feels sleepy though since he sleeps early. However, if he can't sleep then he just goes through the entire night without sleeping. MC worries about him, he tries to brush it off again saying it's no problem, she gets upset, and he startles and gets genuinely apologetic again. SOBS please Bai Qi learn to treasure yourself.

In [Main Story 12-11] Bai Qi gets injured when he was subduing the out-of-control Evol soldier, but he doesn't seem to even notice it until MC brings it up and wants to treat it for him at her house. He even reluctantly shows her his arm.

It's understandable because his DOUCHE FATHER has treated him terribly throughout his life. In [Campus Date] we get a memory from Bai Qi about his father literally saying "Such a useless thing has no point in existing". Ever since his mother passed away (at age 15!) he's been alone.

Fortunately, like I mentioned at the start, Bai Qi gets over most of this trauma in [Campus Date] with the help of MC. But the marks still linger and it's not until he's 24 years old at [Main Story 12-18] where he asserts that his existence is absolutely not a disgrace/stain that he fully gets over his father's specter. Still, Bai Qi's pretty reckless with his health.

Anyway, both MC and Bai Qi need to realize that the best thing you can do for your loved ones is to take care of yourself, because your happiness and health is their happiness and health. Support each other, but treating yourself well for them is the best thing to do.

CONCLUSION

Overall, while Bai Qi is a lone wolf and maverick in public, he's the sweetest puppy around the MC. He's terribly reckless with his health (he's been trained to be a weapon and, no doubt, his father still haunts him), but he's slowly overcoming that with the MC. She also encourages him to be more expressive of his opinions, no matter how small or insignificant he feels they are (re: the things he really couldn't care less about).

In return, he gives MC courage to walk her own path no matter what anyone else says. His easy confidence and ability to ignore the gaze of the world is something that's admirable.

The two of them just provide each other unconditional love and support and it's gorgeous. She can act however she wants with him and he'll take it in stride and accept her. He doesn't want her to change, and neither does she for him. But together they encourage each other to express their opinions and feelings to each other more.

Anyway, congratulations to anyone who read all the way down to this point. You deserve a Bai Qi SSR and may you be blessed with Bai Qi pulls---. I also hope this provides a better understanding of Bai Qi and more appreciation for his character.

I didn't touch on Bai Qi's hobbies or character apart from the MC much, unfortunately, because the focus of this post was about his relationship with MC and his character around that. But, trust me, he has a lot of hobbies for himself! He's just low-key in the way he expresses those (cause he's too loud in beaming heart eyes at the MC), so it's like a "blink and you miss it".

His official weibo shows a ton of his hobbies though, like taking care of his (eternally dying) cacti. He has a hedgehog! He loves basketball (and other sports). He plays the guitar and sings. He loves astronomy.

[msladyrosa]

I'm here to tell a story that my heart is screaming at me to tell.

This is me. I fucking hate myself, just as much as I fake loving me. I don't think I've ever been this contempt as I was in these photos. I'm awkward and I fake confidence by throwing sarcastic and snarky comments. My coping mechanism consists of lying and just hiding behind my fake me. I've created a confident, pretty and delusional front that isn't me, but it's just as real as the raw version. My raw is ugly and disgusting and I hate it. I hid it and for the love of the non existent God there is, I wish I didn't have the raw side. I write in my skin, because if I went back to cutting, then I would no longer have pretty skin that people can love. I love eating, but I don't do it, because of the fear of losing my 36,28,42 measurements. I'm suicidal, but heavens forgive if I make a joke about it in order to cope with my insane itch to make my skin purple. My arm hair is soft and the last time I shaved I was scared that someone might see the thin, white lines that are underneath. My body is sexy as fuck, but Heavens forgive me if I actually feel comfortable in it. Thoughts of "they'll be fine without me" or "it's better if I'm not here" are drowned by the words I told someone who was a suicidal as me, "killing yourself would not make the pain disappear, you're just passing it on to someone else". I'm such a fucking hypocrite, or is it just a twisted way of actual introspection? What is wrong with the way I walk funny because I'm dizzy for the lack of food is that people notice. Oh great deity in the sky, please allow them to notice, but forgive them is they dare to ask what's wrong. I look happy and relaxed in the photos, hell yes, but not I'm an anxious mess that's writing this in the middle of a mental breakdown. Parents are never the one's to blame, no forgive them for not validating their children's emotions and struggles. No, strict parenthood creates strong-willed, rightful and successful people that think of themselves as worthless, weak, pathetic excuses. Oh we lie, and we lie good. Ask actors if they had strict parents... You'll find none, why? Because strict parents will inforce you an internalized fear of failure outside of social norms and acting is "a waste of time" to their standards. Support doesn't come from the right sized bra, but it sure as fucking hell is welcoming to be held and somehow relived from a burden you didn't fucking asked for. I was so happy ya'll. I was in cloud nine. That day I had a date with a guy I like that I thought was way out of my league, I lied my way through his pseudo intellectual remarks and he believed it.

We know how to lie so good and so true that eventually you lose track of your actual motive to do it in the first place. Society wants you perky and pretty, fuck yeah they do. How do I get all perky and pretty when I only see disgusting, overdosed surroundings? It's easy to get worried when you finally realize somethings not right. It wasn't right to be kneeling at someone's feet screaming a nasty and raspy wail of pain. 10 years it took me to fucking do that and yet nothing really changed. Now I'm just looked at with pity and the quizzical look that can only mean "when is this one gonna blow up again?" Oh, honey, I won't, you're just worried that you're just realizing this now. It's easy to be outside and just stay that way.

I was so happy, all the time. I was forced to lie in order to move forward. You love me? Yeah, as long as you earn it. Are you proud? Sure, as long as you don't fail. Am I okay because I feel like this? Well, it's fine as long as you keep it in. It's beautiful. "As long as..." my reality had always been subjected to a condition, and clause, a fucking constant reminder that I have to earn my happiness. I have to earn my own idea of self worth that is diluted through your standards. I have to earn reassurance from the people I surround myself. I must assume the best case scenario but I can't be surprised when it's the worst outcome.

Having loved a mad human made me realize how flawed I am. I was happy. So, so happy I forgot I wasn't. I tortured myself through endless nights of doubt, starvation with a full kitchen. Sleepless nights contemplating self harm and then decided against it because I had work and the cute client at work would see how damaged I was. I tortured myself with the idea of loneliness in a see of people, only to realize I've been in that see long enough that I grew a tail and fins. I was plagued my guilt because I didn't love them, but when exactly did it go from happy to uttermost bullshit? I was so happy I forgot what sadness was.

I was so happy it started hurting. Hurting when I failed to do something. It was excruciating when I was not able to buy a car because I had noticed I had spent my money of pleasing those who swore they'd provide for me. I was in pain when I showered and instead of singing, I just blasted music loud enough so that nobody heard my hyperventilating bitch ass. I was in so much pain that I welcomed it as my way of happiness. I loved my pain, because I've had it my whole life.

I had it when I was in forth grade and in order to fit in I had to go a sneak around to kiss a boy, and I didn't want to. It was there when I was accused of fighting other girls, but in reality I was trying to establish my self worth, so I was punished. In fifth grade I loved a boy so much I had written beautiful words to describe how much I loved his smile, and so he said I was stalking him and he got scared; 2 months later I was in a shrinks chair talking about it; fast-forward to last night, that same boy explained to me how much he wanted to fuck me now that he had lost weight. Middle school was terrible. Seventh grade, I was constantly degrading myself because another pretty blonde chick was only my friend when she could laugh through me. I insulted a perfectly great teacher because she noticed my self destructive behavior. Eighth grade came and I was lost with a blonde boy. He was beautiful and I was not. He was friends with the girl that swore fielty to me and he chose someone else and because he chose the pretty pale skin on someone else, I settled for the kid that wantedto finger me in the bleachers during recess. Ninth grade came and I was failing classes, parents were strict and hurtful, but they aren't to blame for my shortcomings. That's when I found myself in the arms of the pretty blonde thing I had fallen for. The pretty girl had him in public, I could only have him when we snuck around and he would hold me and kiss me like holding on to his life line. I was letting him touch me, but my self hatred didn't know no boundaries so I suck to my knees and gave my first blowjob at the top of staircase wearing only a lazy purple bra and the school uniform and the shame I'll forever wear because I did it without wanting to, but because I was expected to.

I was so happy to be out of there, that I ended up sinking deeper into my lie. I was smart, new and vulnerable. That's how I met the wholesome boy I called my first boyfriend who was nice and respectful, but he was as ugly as they come. I was a queen to him, but he was looking more like the ogre on the fairy tale and there came my vanity, my ego, my selfishness. I was brutal and I couldn't care less. High school started with a bang with the boy I played with, and when he got to close to my actual raw person, I kicked him out with a bang and he cried. I just stood there not knowing how to react, so I just went on to the next person I could lead on and play. Junior year I knew was difficult, and a black boy with a nice boy and a promising basketball future came around, I once again craved approval and degraded myself to it. That's how I ended up sneaking around 10 minutes before my parents picked me up. In the second floor, I'd found myself again on my knees, and expected to give a blowjob in exchange for attention, and like before, I was hidden, and I expected to be I had tears in my eyes, but because of my shame. Senior year came in, and the black boy with the attractive body was replaced with another, but this one only had pretty eyes and the promise of spoiling me with his family's money. Once again, I said yes when he said he wanted me to be his girlfriend, at least this time I was not hidden, but I was back in the cycle and I ditched my best friend in a movie theater so that I would be in the backseat on a Dodge, sucking my pseudo boyfriend's dick with tears on my eyes, not becauseofhis size, but becausethe disgust towards myself. Like before, I was expected to do so, and so I did.

Heavens above forgive the religion to blame women for sin and lust, but instead punish us for the boys who couldn't keep their dicks to themselves. The end of senior year came, and I was relieved, but then I fell for the guy my parents liked. Humble background, similar interests, and a promise of stability. I was ditched because for him I was a whore and his friends told him so, I accepted the insults and insinuations.

I was so happy, I forgot the rest. College was great and a religious nut job, a platonic love, a semi smart dipshit with the complex of being over everyone in experience, a quiet mature man that treated me with decency, the suicidal broken guy who needed healing #1 and the suicidal broken guy who needed healing #2, later, here I am.

I was so happy in these pictures, I had no idea was contemplating my own disappearance. I write this with migrane, blue ink from a ballpoint in my thighs, with nostalgic memories of moments where my mind wasn't this crowded. I was so happy it hurt. I guess that my logic dictates that happiness is painful and that my pain can bring me joy, but fuck I was so happy.

I had everything. I was pretty, I was smart, I was important. I'm still all those things, but right this very second, I'm happy, and painful so. Heavens above forgive for I have sinned...

I dared to fail... I sinned

I dared to fall into lust... I sinned

I dared to judge... I sinned

I fucking dared to wake up every miserable day... I had sinned.

I dared to be painfully happy... I sinned

I lied... and so that's my greatest sin of all.

[cozycryptidcorner]

This is a monster match for an intrepid anonymous user!

So I'm pan, but vaguely have a preference for men, but like specifically cute, non-threatening ones. I'm infp-t for mbti. I read a lot, and I love games. I have ADHD and i have trouble doing work because of it but it's also the reason I can figure out random plot twists or do well at guessing games. My friends and I joke that I have a high passive charisma, because I'm just oblivious and talk a lot. I have a lot of stuffed animals, many of them I got specifically because they're wonky in some way. I have too many books. I really like soft things, and soft people. Thank you.

You have been matched with an elf! Well, the name humans call his kind changes over the years, älva, elverfolk, álfur, and so on, but it seems that rather modern writers and historians have decided on the term ‘elf’ when talking about his kind. Doesn’t really matter to him, though, because his people have their own word for themselves, one that humans couldn’t even pronounce, much less would they dare say, even if they could. While his kind considered more advanced than yours, he will admit, it’s rather remarkable what giant leaps of technology have been made in such a short amount of time.

While his people haven’t really had much need for objects such as cell phones or computers, they do depend on a mysterious source of magic they call the Æther. Things like medicine, communication, teleportation, the works, all can be achieved by tapping into it, so you suppose the need for something like cars or vaccines aren’t a necessity for them as they are for those on this plane of reality. Your elf doesn’t really go into much detail about the mystical otherworld, though hints that most of his kind are sworn against revealing any secrets to anyone on the outside about their mystical abilities. You don’t much mind, though sometimes the thought of an untapped, seemingly eternal energy source does keep you up at night.

He is ethereally beautiful, you would never dare lie about that, and very clearly inhuman to anyone with well-seeing eyes. There is a blue tinge to his skin, where any red tones might be on a human. It’s probably because his blood has a purplish navy tinge. If it was red, he most likely would look just like any other human being, albeit with vividly green, slightly upturned eyes, and cheekbones that can cut through glass. His hair is a long, glossy blond, like spun gold, and he enjoys braiding it down in seemingly thousands of different ways. You don’t think you’ve seen him wear the same hairstyle twice, though, at the seemingly endless variants he’s done, you don’t believe you would even recognize it if he did repeat one or two.

Oh, and he’s tall, much taller than the average human. It’s very easy to pick him out in a crowd- he’s the blond standing at least a head higher than everyone else. It’s rather convenient for you because you don’t ever lose him whenever you are out in public. Maybe his blueish skin would be easy to pick out as well, but he usually glamors himself whenever he’s mingling with other humans, as to not draw too much attention. If that were the case, though, maybe he should shave a few inches off his height, also, because damn, even without the blueness, he still draws plenty of stares.

Your elf seems offended if anyone mixes him up with the fae, because the faeries and the elves are very different, thank you very much. When asked how, he usually just goes spluttering about how they don’t respect magic barriers, or how they just ‘make up’ rules about the use of magic which has absolutely nothing to do with anything factual, mind you, and besides, they have no sense of propriety, have you even heard about that white-haired slut who quite literally fucked himself into a curse? It’s their fault they’re dying off, they have no respect for anyone but themselves, etcetera, etcetera, until your elf would wear himself out.

But of course, you mean biologically, as in, what separates the two as species from each other. Which, after a long while of getting talked around in circles, you realize that there really isn’t a difference? Besides their core values and use of the Æther, it seems to you that they are basically the same, sort of like how Catholics might claim they differ significantly from the Lutherans, but seem basically the same from a far off distance. The same source of magic, able to handle it well enough like their bodies evolved to do so, just a very, very different outlook on what it should be used for. The elves, then, you gather, are a vaguely distant parental figure to the human race who only show up when things are fucked royally. In contrast, the faeries are more like that weird crack-addicted cousin who no one invites to get-togethers but still shows up anyway, taking their pranks a little too far.

Oh, and if you think he’s venomously pissed at being mistaken for a faery, don’t even think about mentioning Santa’s little helpers to him, either. He practically starts frothing at the mouth.

Elves have longer than human lifespans, yes, but they also don’t live for a thousand millennia, like modern stories might have you believe. Sure, they live for about two, maybe three hundred years, and that most certainly is much longer than a human, but your elf hasn’t been around since the dawn of time. He did live through the space race, though, and witnessed the moon landing with his own two eyes, just over yonder from where the plucky crew of the Apollo 12 landed. Maybe all those crackpot conspiracy theories about ‘aliens on the moon’ are about him? Who knows, definitely not him.

He does have his place in elven society as a sort of sentinel, or watcher, someone who keeps an eye on the human race and makes sure they don’t do anything particularly stupid. Given the fact he can just walk into places he most certainly should not be, it’s rather easy for him to do so. Though he’s not allowed to interfere unless there is immediate danger of annihilation, he just reports what he’s seen or found to a council of elders, and they decide what should be done with it. He rarely ever participates in whatever direction the council chooses, citing something about the fact that watchers might try to take advantage of such protocols. So, there will be times where he can relax at home while a bunch of other elves take care of the problem... or problems.

When he’s not being constantly vigilant against the top one percent of humanity that seems to want to ultimately doom the other ninety nine percent, he has some hobbies he likes to fall back to. At first, you weren’t sure what to make of his favorite, because pottery? An elf who can call forth a god-like amount of power from some alternate dimension made only from pure energy likes to make little clay things? But yes, actually, he does, and it’s probably because he can harness such power.

Unlike humans, the elves have always been able to snap things into existence. Oh, you need something to hold that ambrosia? Just think really hard about it, and a bowl will appear from seemingly thin air, pulled from its point in time to where you are today. Humans, though, clearly don’t have that kind of liberty, so they were forced to get creative with simple necessities that an elf wouldn’t think twice about. Pottery stems from one of those needs, using clay to create things to eat and drink out of, and your elf finds it just fascinating at the skill and engineering it takes to merely make something look… functional.

Sure, his stuff used to be crazy-lopsided and uneven, but he’s getting better at it, steadily, slowly, under the guidance of a local ceramics professor. Yes, he goes to a university class to advance his skill, isn’t it what humans do, too? He might not actually pay for it, per se, he kind of just… charmed the staff to slide him into the class, and doesn’t have any intention of actually graduating or anything, so he runs free on the campus while disguised to the teeth with a more human appearance, letting his artistic side run free.

Maybe also more of a side note, but he loves animals. Loves them. Animals have such a fundamentally innocent nature about them, yet domesticated creatures like dogs have such a love for their masters that it almost physically hurts him to think about. Even though he can’t really have a dog at the moment- his current human landlord has a very strict pet policy because of her and a few other tenants’ allergies. Though your elf seems satisfied with cutting corners elsewhere, he doesn’t feel like making some humans permanently ill just because he’d like a dog to be around.

[manorbagofsand]

he takes mental inventory of everything he's eaten since yesterday morning.

coffee.

an english muffin.

a few handfuls of spicy peanuts.

the last few plantain chips.

a beer.

another beer.

kombucha, free from your housemate’s job.

another beer. 

a wash of shame comes over him. he shouldn't drink this much. but he knows he won't change. he at least shouldn't try to hide that he drinks this much, leaving the empty cans on the floor between his bedside table and the bed until he can covertly discard them. 

is he an alcoholic?

he takes inventory. he's not very functional while drunk, that's why he drinks, after all. alcohol gifting him a sense of complacency unavailable to him otherwise. he has, 1 or 2 drinks a day, and only most days. he's only been drunk at work twice, before, both after a night out with Esther, both miserable experiences, vomiting outside in the median between the sidewalk and the street where some bright-eyed city planner probably thought would have flowers, but actually just has bark mulch and the shiny glint of litter. he thinks of his ex's dad, asleep over a glass on the table. he thinks of the characters in lucia berlin stories, the desperate night errands to buy a fifth, how the other addicts told her she wasn't really one of them if she wasn't a wino. he only really drinks beer? he is fine when he doesn't drink? well, fine meaning miserable and desperately seeking escape. he feels another wash of guilt thinking about all the alcoholism screening assessments he's lied on. lately he's been putting down eight. that's one for four days a week, two for another two, and taking a day off. he tries to convince himself of this. he can’t remember the last time he took a day off. he buys two six-packs a week. he drank half a six-pack just yesterday. 

okay so what if he’s an alcoholic, he can’t manage otherwise. maybe he should have a drink before he leaves to see tony. is noon too early?

he takes inventory, he can only think of one time he started drinking alone that early in the day, and it was before a date. a first date, at that. he thinks that felt justified, but also is an incredible bad look. okay, no, he doesn’t need a drink now, doesn’t even want one. he thinks about Wendy in Little Fish, Jonny Appleseed, Jessa in Mostly Dead Things and it doesn’t make him feel better, but he is at least able to move back to what he was trying to think about –

this morning, coffee.

more coffee.

he decides, as usual, to forgo, breakfast, even though he still has more english muffins and even has the right brand of almond butter. in addition to all the wrong brands he's never going to touch. he thinks he probably won't get fucked until evening, so he doesn't want to give his digestive system any ammunition with that much time.

he takes inventory of all the things he needs to dispose of while his housemate is out of town this weekend.

the four empty beer cans under his bed.

the cake he made last week and never even cut.

the pie his friend gave him that he also never cut that is now starting to grow mold.

the remaining slices of bread that are too old.

the potatoes in the fridge he cooked and didn't like the texture of.

the soup he made on monday. but what if the soup is still good? probably, but he probably won't eat it so he should just let it go now. it makes him feel worse to consider how careful his housemate is about not wasting food, that thinking about what he might think washes him with yet another icy bucket of shame. if he discards it now, maybe his housemate won’t notice, or just think that he ate it. he feels bad, but not enough to actually make him eat it. 

he should go to the farm stand and buy produce tomorrow. or maybe he shouldn't because he's just going to compost most of it anyway.

the half a roasted sweet potato, that he weirdly had cut into circular discs rather than his usual wedges. actually, he will eat that still. sweet potatoes have become a go-to for him in the last few months. long-shelf life. they keep well after being cooked. and also, he pretty reliably still feels interested in eating them even after they’ve finished roasting. what kind of motherfucker can’t even be interested in eating food through the forty minutes it takes to prepare? they don’t do anything suspect to his shit, which is to say, he can’t see them again on that end. 

he takes inventory of all of the things he’s stopped eating because they come out identifiable in his shit. quinoa. corn. grapefruit. carrots. he thinks about the girl who lived with his ex-, who had her eating disorder diagnosed because her therapist noticed her hands had turned orange because she only ate sweet potatoes. how she had speculated Japanese sweet potatoes wouldn’t be as obvious. how it all came crashing together then for him how his hands had also been orange when he was in high school. for him, baby carrots. he tried to remember when he still ate bagged processed vegetables. 

he tried to remember what it was like before anyone had told him there was something wrong with him. before there was something wrong with him?

no, he remembers standing in the shower, circling around if he could be pregnant. he hadn’t had sex with anyone, but what if? he remembers having a doctor recommend he get tested for female athlete triad syndrome, how he still was new to interacting with doctors and didn’t realise they weren’t actually going to follow through at all on that. feeling like there was not anything wrong with him, that he was finally in control.

the dirty condom from a few nights, when he didn’t want to clean himself out, let alone clean the toy off afterwards. he laughs how he still doesn't have a trash can in his room. this seems the most reasonable of all on this list. yes, he’s an immature fag with no blinds and dirty condoms on his floor. this is a flaw he’s willing to lean into, to pretend he is loose and free and reckless. but he isn’t. he is so wound up in his head. he has practiced these worries too many times today already. the only kind of reckless he could actually claim is the four burn scars on his arms from cooking while drunk in the last year. which he worries people will ask if he did intentionally. 

what if he did do it intentionally? 

he doesn't want to be like this. the shame layers on, shame that he hates how he is, but doesn't change. no matter how rational he is, he cannot actually convince himself that no one cares. shame that he has no control over his shame. 

he has to leave in hour and half if he’s not going to be unacceptably late. he wonders if he can make it out of the house by then.

he heads for the bathroom. puts the fan on the 40 minute timer. worries his housemate will wonder what he is up to. tries to convince himself he already knows, that he does not care. he wants that, but he can’t convince himself. 

he’s also covered in sex-bruises all the time on his neck and shoulders and wrists and he does not hide them, and no one even says anything. does his housemate know that he is gay?

is he gay enough? 

he feels shame that he still uses the same beginner douche kit he bought years ago. he remembers the pang of jealously of learning about posh gays with a whole douche attachment for their shower head. what if he were that put together? 

he flips the toilet seat up, so it won’t get splashed, and tries to focus on relaxing his sphincter. 

he’s not actually ashamed of his body. except for the way his skin hangs loose on his abdomen, refusing to show his faint hard work of abs. except how his chest and legs are covered in red welts and scabs. except that he is covered with scars, most of them self-inflicted, which are visible enough that he feels constantly conscious of them, but not gnarly enough that people actually ever ask about them. except the way he has a bald spot right under his chin on his beard, how the whole thing is still pretty sparse, maybe he should just shave it but then he feels shame about looking pubescent. 

but he thinks he’s not ashamed of his bodily functions. he’s not afraid of his own shit. he thinks about the shame of the dirty condom on the floor of his room. he thinks about all the times he’s scraped his middle finger a circle around the inside of his rectum, feeling for any residual chunks to decide if he needs to douche another round. he thinks about the time after getting fucked that somehow he had shit all over his own feet, how his ex had gently gotten paper towels and wiped them off, gently, and wordlessly. 

and yet, it’s been years since he’s been on so much as a first date without cleaning himself in advance. it’s not that he’s afraid of someone being spooked when their cock comes out streaked, it’s just that it seems worth the relief to be able to avoid it. except that relief is fleeting. untrustworthy. whatever. he knows its what he needs to do in order to actually leave the house. he scrapes his finger around the inside, up through the second mouth, which yields to show it has nothing else to reveal, like Monty Hall opening the first door.

placated, he gets in the shower. he thinks about how freud would have had a heyday with him. 

he really doesn’t want to have to have that conversation. he thinks tony already seems to think he doesn’t eat. this isn’t quite true, but he is charmed by the simplicity of it. he feels some obligation to uphold that expectation, to be able to avoid eating in front of him. he wants to avoid the intimacy of having a conversation about his pre-sex routine, which seems only possible by keeping a very strict pre-sex routine. 

tony asked him recently to take a weekend trip with him. the travel. the prolonged company, sharing meals, the ruined veneer of being ready all the time. 

he could come up with five hundred reasons why he can’t go, but are any of them good enough to say to someone else? could he suffer through just a weekend? 

could he, 

maybe, 

even, 

have an okay time?

[tmiquotepage]

I REALLY Need Advice

(LONG post, but I appreciate any feedback you guys can offer me here!)

I currently work as a babysitter for three wonderful children for the summer. They are 7, 10, and 13. I used to watch them before school during the school year, and I watched them for Spring Break as well. The parents got a divorce not long after I started working for them, and so the kids travel back and forth between two apartments five minutes apart. That's the gist of the background.

Now, normally, my fee for babysitting, especially for 3 kids, is $10/hr. The hours I agreed to at the beginning of the summer were 6 am until 3 pm. (I also live 30 minutes away, but my hour of commuting and my gas were never on the table for reimbursement.) Well, the mom asked me on Spring Break if, since I would be watching the kids for 8 weeks, we could do $300 a week, as $450 would get "quite expensive after 8 weeks" (like, yeah. Individualized care for kids is expensive. If you want cheaper, put em in a camp or daycare. Jesus.). I got her to raise that amount to $350, because $300 for 45 hours a week is highway robbery and less than minimum wage. I wouldn’t be able to afford my car and the gas to move this summer. Okay. That was settled.

Summer time rolls around and, at the end of the school year, the mom gets a new boyfriend, who immediately moves in with her. We'll talk about this dude later, because WHEW. Anyway, despite the fact that this dude is constantly hungover and/or day drinking and/or sleeping, the mom decides he is an adequate babysitter for the kids a few days a week. So, my schedule becomes completely confusing (as in, the mom will literally wait until 10 pm the night before to tell me whether or not she needs me the next day, whether she wants me to come in late, etc.). Keep in mind, even though we said "$350 a week," I am really getting paid $70/day. Which is the same thing. Unless you get told at last minute that you aren't needed for the three days of the week the mom has the kids with her boyfriend, in which case, it's only $140. So, I am already having issues with how much I am getting paid BEFORE I get into the shit show that is the family dynamic I have to work with.

Now, let's talk about the family. I'll obviously give codenames, not real names, because I'm not a monster. We'll start with the parents, Popeye (Dad) and Diva (Mom).

Popeye is a good dad. Works hard, doesn't make a ton of money, but always spends what he has on his kids. His apartment has more kids toys than signs of being a bachelor pad. He works hard, hasn't seen anyone since the divorce. His primary focus has ALWAYS been his kids. He cooks dinner for them almost every night (eating out is MAD rare. He's a really good cook.) He is ex-Navy, so he can be a bit strict. He doesn't accept mouthing off or being rude, but he also isn't mean. I have never seen him yell at his children or get angry. He is completely in control of his emotions around them. He's not a huge hardass about censoring his kids either. He'll let them listen to explicit rap music, play war video games with the kids. He's careful, but not overprotective. He is a balanced, comfortable, imperfect but loving parent

And then there's Diva™️. Diva is an Australian transplant who has a master's degree in the art of giving facials. She is all about pristine living, Michael Kors jackets, and acting way more rich and perfect than she is (though she has a LOT more money than Popeye). Acts like she is God's gift to all mankind. She has a boyfriend, who we will call JT, that she puts above all else - including her 3 children. Dinner at her house is almost always take out because, as her 10 year old tells me, she knows how to cook, but badly, and she's just too lazy to do it. She runs her own business, is constantly looking for groupons for the kids to use. Or rather, looks for cheap things "kids their age" would like. I am convinced she knows nothing about her children's likes and dislikes. Their rooms are her house are sterile and clean and don't have much feeling. Whenever things are out of place, she makes them clean it up and chastises them because "they are old enough to know better." She acts the part of the nurturing, caring, all-natural mother, but her eyes and words are always cool and sharp as a blade. She, the small woman I could probably break like a toothpick, scares me more than the buff retired navy father or the ex-con she has living with her and her children. I get the feeling, from the way the kids talk about her, that they have the same fears as I do.

As a tack on the end of the adult descriptions, allow me to tell you the bit I know about JT, the mom's boyfriend. He is significantly younger than her, halfway between the ages of her and her 13 year old daughter. He is a hot head. No job. Sleeps most of the day. Often leave the apartment reeking of booze. Often hungover. Has been in jail before, though I am unsure as to what he was arrested for. From what the kids said, I believe it was some sort of assault, burglary, or armed robbery. He occasionally cooks the meals at the house, which means the kids are at least getting a little bit of non-fast-food when they stay there (or, as the mom puts it, when they “visit.” They apparently don't “live” there. They visit, like you might visit a grandparent.). He has a daughter that is 10 years old, who also lives with him at Diva's house when she isn't with her mom. JT is confrontational with Diva's 10 year old boy, which I'll talk about later. I never feel comfortable when he is around, because he seems misogynistic (he called his daughter a ho for wearing yoga pants out to play) and always looks like he's ready to start a fight. Even though he and the mom are just dating, he already acts like a stepdad to Diva's kid, and he is NOT the good kind. When the kids do something he doesn't like, he will call Diva and tell her to chastise and punish the children. Occasionally, he even gives them punishments like grounding them for three weeks, even though he has ZERO authority to do so. Diva always takes his side in arguments.

On to the kids. Diva and Popeye have three: Uni (13), Pathfinder (10), and Sharknado (7). JT has one daughter, Mellie (10).

Uni is the most mature of the kids. She is a very talented artist who has been dealing really well with the divorce, as she surrounds herself with friends, a positive attitude, and creative outlets, like skateboarding and drawing. She cooks for herself often, and easily adapts to whichever situation she is in. It rarely ever feels like a chore to watch her when we go somewhere. She helps with the boys when I am swamped, occasionally, and knows how to calm the youngest's tantrums. The only real issue I have with her is when she and the middle child get in arguments and she tried to mother him and chastise him. It doesn't go well.

Next up, we have Pathfinder. Pathfinder is a 10 year old boy, the middle child. He plays video games very well, and has a soft heart which he will show when you prove he can trust you. He is, by far, the best dancer and beat spitter in the whole family, and he is proud of the fact. Pathfinder has a few behavioral issues where he will lie, and push boundaries every once in a while. He gets heated when playing video games, and often plays way too roughly and/or doesn't share with his little brother. Pathfinder, however, I understand more than I think I used to. He is a middle child with a sick younger brother and an older sister who wants nothing to do with him. He gets bullied at school and doesn’t make friends easily. He is starting to show early signs of major depression. Perhaps most importantly, Pathfinder is not taking the divorce well. More specifically, he clashes like hell with Diva's boyfriend. JT often picks fights with him and gets in his face. JT constantly feels the need to assert authority over Pathfinder and intimidate him. Pathfinder has shared with me that he never feels comfortable staying with JT. He begs me to take him to his dad's, to get him out of the apartment whenever possible. A few weeks ago, he stood up for himself to the boyfriend. JT gog in his face and yelled at him, then grounded him off all electronics (which, let's be honest, was because he wanted to play Pathfinder's Xbox at Diva's apartment without Pathfinder telling him no, because he's the one that got it for his birthday). When Pathfinder told his dad that he didn't want to go to his mom's anymore, the mother called the kid while we were at the store getting supplies for a craft project to tell him he was grounded for longer and that she was now going to shave his hair that he's been growing out for two years because he isn't respecting her boyfriend. She told me he wasn't allowed to even do our craft or watch TV. He could “sit on the couch and twiddle his thumbs" all day. (I eventually said fuck it and let him do whatever he wanted because we were at Popeye's place, and I could see that this kid was positively distraught.) He is STILL grounded, 3 weeks later. Yesterday, JT came out of his bedroom while the kids were talking, got in Pathfinder's face and started calling him gay because his shorts were sagging a bit. I took Pathfinder to Popeye's because he was shaken at the altercation, and told his mom what happened. Her ONLY response was “[Pathfinder]’s main problem is that he can't take direction or obey adults, and he needs to work on that.” What's worse about this situation is this kid has since told me (since he knows I am gay and proud and accepting) that he feels like he might be bisexual. He doesn't feel like he’d be safe if his mom and JT found out he is interested in a boy in his class. Pathfinder has openly stated that he hates his life, dreads staying at his mom's place, feels completely alone, thinks no one loves him. He barely calls her “mom" anymore. He has said that, if she goes through with shaving his head, he will never call her “mom” again, and will basically disown her as his mother. Keep in mind with all this shit that this child is 10. Ten years old and already a god damned nearly suicide risk, judging by his words and behavior lately. I had a meltdown yesterday when I realized this much because, unless this kid get serious help, he could very easily be just another name on the news in the coming years, and that breaks my heart.

Finally, we have the youngest child of Popeye and Diva, Sharknado. Sharknado is seven. Sharknado is a total trainwreck in the behavioral department. This kid has an adrenal insufficiency that means he is reliant on a steroid the way a diabetic is reliant on insulin. He is a bit more prone to disease than other kids. As a result, the mother babies the ever-loving shit out of him. She lets him get away with absolutely everything, and blames Pathfinder if they are ever in an argument. Tells Pathfinder he has to be gentle with his little brother. As a result of this parenting, Sharknado is a MAJOR tantrum thrower, even at age seven. If we are not playing the game he wants to play, the screaming and stomping starts. If he is losing, the screaming and stomping starts. If we are not actively paying attention to him, he will scream and make a spectacle of himself. Where the mother loves seeing that Pathfinder has an issue taking direction from adults, she is blind to the fact that her youngest is exponentially worse. When we go to the store, he runs off. When we go out to do something, he is instantly bored. When I tell him not to touch things in the store, he thinks it is funny to grab it an run away from me. If he is in any way unhappy, he will drop onto the floor and start screaming. Even in public (bowling alley, the zoo). Rules just do not apply to him, and he is positively dumbfounded when you try to correct this behavior through punishment (like taking away a toy, or banning video games for the day). We played the quiet game one day where all winner would get a dollar when we got back (because I had a headache and it was an hour drive and they just kept arguing). He talked the entire ride home, and the others didn't. They got a dollar each, he didn't. He pitched the biggest fit, pounding on the floor screaming, hiding under the bed, saying he wished he was dead because I was being so mean to him. He is always yelling about “fairness" when you tell him “no.” I don't think he actually knows what the word means. Sharknado is a nightmare who never listens and screams his head off on a daily basis, louder when I tell him to stop. And yet the mom has never threatened to chop his locks off. He is her perfect angel.

Lastly, I'll introduce you to Mellie, JT's daughter. She is 10. She is kind and generally respectful, which I assume comes from her mother's side. She is a daddy's girl, however, and so takes on her father's qualities when it comes to his treatment of Diva's kids. She's best friends with Uni, which is great, because Uni needed a girl friend to hang out with during the summer. She let’s Sharknado win in games and babies him. And, of course, she constantly belittles and picks fights with Pathfinder. This week was the first week I was babysitting her as well, so I don’t know much more than that.

So here's my main problem (yeah, all the above was essentially preface. That's the stuff I am USED to putting up with for barely minimum wage). This week, I watched the kids at Popeye's apartment Monday and Friday, with the rest of the days at Diva's. JT was at Diva's, but he is unable to travel, I guess, and two of the kids had dentist appointments two of the days. So, I went. At Diva's request, I came in later at 10 am on Tuesday and Wednesday, then 7:30 am in Thursday. On Tuesday, the kids were having a pillow fight in the apartment at, like, 1 pm, which apparently woke JT up, so he came lumbering out of the bedroom, snatched up the Xbox controller Pathfinder was using to find a YouTube video, and yelled at everyone – Mellie included – to get dressed and go play outside. I was then (without ever being asked) babysitting a fourth child outside with my three. We ended up going to the pool all three days, too, by the way. Three days with 4 kids in a pool. I stayed an hour late the first day, and an hour and a half late yesterday, too, because I came in late. I drove the kids to their appointments, and also made 4 different trips to and from Popeye's apartment to retrieve things for the children, and I drove the girls around to gather ingredients for their bake sale. Keep in kind, it was nearly 50 miles just with the kids in my car (not counting my commute or anything) that I was not getting reimbursed for. I also went and spent $60 on pool toys for the kids (including Mellie), because I love them and want them to have a great time. I spent personal money, knowing I wouldn't get reimbursed. But here's the kicker. When I contacted Diva to ask about adjusted payment to include the fourth child, she just said (I swear I could literally hear venom dripping from her teeth) “of course I won't short you for those days, even though you came in late. You will get the full $350 we agreed on.” Basically, even though she is already paying me peanuts, she assumes the fourth child is covered by the extra hours in the day I didn't come in. As if I shouldn't be getting paid at least $70/day, regardless of what hours I work, because even that is barely acceptable for the job I do. I should also mention that she and the dad split the childcare costs. So, if she really is saying the rest of that $350 completely covers the cost of a fourth kid, that means Popeye is shelling out childcare costs for his ex-wife's boyfriend's daughter.

So that's my situation right now. I just want advice, you guys. Should I stay, leave, ask for more per week? I mean, the thing is, I know the dad will pay more if I ask, but he's already spread pretty thin with the income. Diva is the one who always asks me to cart the kids places and has me watching extra kids and do extra stuff like crafts with them, and she’s the one who makes so much money, but she's the one who is being stingy and not giving me what I deserve. It bugs me. I just need advice on future steps, guys. I love these kids, and I don't want to just leave and have them think it was something they did wrong, but I am at the end of my mental rope. What do I do here?

[angclicals-blog]

⟨  𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐎𝐃𝐔𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍  / /    MARINO, LEONARDO.   ⟩

hello, friends ! admin fox here with her third trash boy, leonardo. he’s been in torn forever and he is .... how do you say ... way too fucking old for this bullshit. all of his info is under the cut and if you’d like to plot pretty please like this post or message me !

⋆ ◦ ° ☾ jeffrey dean morgan + cis male + he/him — have you seen leonardo ‘leo’ marino around? this fifty-one year old known as the connard has been hanging out at prophecy ink tattoo & piercing a lot recently. they are a civilian that works as a restaurateur, and they feel worn out about the gangs. a bisexual leo, they are charming + adaptable, as well as unforgiving + domineering. knuckle tattoos. salt & pepper beard. an old bottle of red wine.

⟨  𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐎𝐃𝐔𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍  / /    early life.   ⟩

leo was born in valdez, to a military father and a housewife mother; his father was at the base away from valdez most of the time, so leo spent his days with his mother & his brother, gio. when his father was in town, however, it was the worst time of his life; his dad was very strict, wanting things done in his way and he wasn’t afraid to get physical if things went wrong. 

ever since a child, leo had a problem with authority; he’d clash with his father, his teachers, the local police. his family couldn’t even bring a nanny into the house without leonardo running her off at some point; he’s a very opinionated man, and he isn’t afraid to say exactly what’s on his mind--- he’s very similar to his father in that way, though leo would die before he admits to being anything alike the man. 

leo has always had a big interest in politics; it’ the kind of power and decision making that really gets his motor running, so he went to law school at eighteen, and worked hard to make the right connections, working as a lawyer and then as a congressman. 

by the age of forty-five, leonardo was elected mayor of valdez, a job he did for the past five years. it seemed like a dream job, but it turned out to be a nightmare--- with so many politicians in the pocket of the cobras, leo was nothing but a pawn in the hands of the gang he swore to himself he’d never join. so, after years of fighting to make valdez a gang-free city, leonardo finally gave up, resigning himself from the position about a year ago. 

ever since he retired from politics, leo decided to pursue another passion of his--- cooking. it is a skill he learned from his mother as a young boy, and something he’s been working on getting better and better at every chance he gets; about nine months ago leo opened a small bistro downtown, and although now that he doesn’t receive the bribing from the cobras his bank account is considerably smaller, leo has never been happier with his choices. 

despite not staying married for long, leonardo had two children, a boy and a girl that have since grown into fully fledged adult--- his youngest, isabella, still lives in valdez. his oldest kid from a previous relationship, salvatore, died two years ago on a car crash and left behind a son, now three year old blaise, that is currently being cared for by leo. 

⟨  𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐎𝐃𝐔𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍  / /    personality.   ⟩

he’s ... a though dude. leo is very domineering and needs everything done his way--- he doesn’t get physically violent like his father did, but you might hear some screaming in the kitchen of his restaurant if you walk in on a bad day. 

leo’s a tired old man, but at the same time he has never felt more alive. politics were a big passion of his, but it wasn’t a great lifestyle. nowadays, with his little restaurant and not a single responsibility in the world, leonardo is free to do whatever the fuck he wants. which can make him quite irresponsible at times. nothing too crazy, though; he drinks heavily, and he fucks around, but he finds himself way too old to pull any of the crazy stunts most people in town do. 

he feels like he isn’t prepared to raise a child ( he never did, both of his children lived with their mothers ), but little blaise has made him a lot softer than he once was, to the point where some people can’t even believe it.

leo was a politician for a good part of his life, so he’s pretty damn good at lying, and can use his silver-tongue to charm people into doing anything he wants--- a skill he hardly ever uses anymore, being a blunt and sometimes harsh man instead. 

⟨  𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐎𝐃𝐔𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍  / /    appearances.   ⟩

leonardo is 6′2, with deep black hair ( which he usually wears slicked back ) and a thick salt n’ pepper beard that he hardly ever shaves off. 

he had several tattoos across his arms and chest, though the most visible ones are the ones covering his knuckles & back of his hands; a lot of those are recent, but him being a hip politician with tattoos and a “cool style” was a big selling point during his campaign. 

leo dresses with pretty simple clothing, usually sticking to dark jeans and cotton shirts, the occasional leather jacket or hoodie depending on how cold the weather is. he spent most of his youth inside suits, so nowadays he refuses to wear them even on formal settings. 

⟨  𝐈𝐍𝐓𝐑𝐎𝐃𝐔𝐂𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍  / /    plots.   ⟩

a best friend --- yanno.... the one person that has been around him for years, probably was the one that gave him the push to finally switch careers. 

the childhood best friend --- maybe they didn’t meet necessarily as kids, but they grew up together. their families were neighbors back in the day, and this person was one of the few people that leo kept around him back then. they could’ve drifted apart, or maybe they have one of those friendships that has sustained the test of time.

friends of all kinds --- leo can come off as seriously intimidating, but as it turns out he can be quite friendly, so he probably gets along with this person pretty well.

the bad influence --- i’m picturing this as someone at least 10 to 20 years younger than him, and preferably a gang member. it’s someone with whom leo’s first instinct is to be “well, what the hell” and he’ll do things he normally wouldn’t, be that go to a rave late at night, smoke some weed or just eat that greasy bacon cheeseburger that might give him a heart attack. 

the high school sweetheart — they were each other’s first real relationship, and although it’s been years since then, they still have a special place on each other’s heart. 

the ex wife --- they were married briefly about twenty-something years ago, and such marriage gave them isabella. the two weren’t together for more than a year, and although they don’t hold much resentment against each other anymore, it ended pretty badly for the both of them. 

the crush --- this character has a thing for leo. i think it would be fun if they were considerably younger than him, and he’s completely oblivious to how they feel; in fact, he sees them as his own kid, and is probably very affectionate, which in turn only makes the feelings that much harder to get over.

the enemy --- this character has to be a gang member; leonardo has made many enemies over the years, and this person is one of them. either it be because of him cracking down on the gangs back when he was mayor or something else, they make it very clear his presence is never welcome.

the friend with benefits --- leo hasn’t done exclusive relationships in years, but he’s great in the sex department; this character would know that well, since he is constantly hitting them up for some fun with no strings attached.

a hate-sex type of fling — they hate each other for some reason, can never be in the same room without screaming at each other. that is, until they’ve had a couple of drinks and end up sleeping together as often as they fight.

the protegé --- leonardo doesn’t have a lot of parental instincts, but when he takes someone under his wing, he’ll go to hell and back for them; this person reminds him of sal, his dead son, and he would literally take a bullet to keep them safe.

[niskrp]

:// SEARCHING OPERATIVE …

… searching for AGENT 010 / JACK OF CLUBS. classified files indicate that they go by KWON SEOJUN, and are also known as KWON. born in DAMYANG, SK, in 1988/04/15, further investigation makes it clear that they joined the agency SIX YEARS ago. they are a CLANDESTINE AGENT who specialize in ASSET TRAINING and EXECUTIVE OPERATIONS. higher clearance is needed to access further information…

… ENTER PASSWORD TO ACCESS THE COMPLETE FILE.

:// ACCESSING BACKGROUND FILES …

he had an ordinary childhood: loving parents, friends in the neighborhood and everything a man would need to have good memories of his early years. he had good parents, always there for him to help him with school or to take him to parks when they had the time, seojun had nothing to complain about them.

they were very supportive of seojun’s choices and goals, they did what they could to help him achieve everything he wanted as long as he worked hard for it — and he did.

he wasn’t the number one student of his class, but he did everything he could and was satisfied with being the second best, and it was more than enough to get into a good university in seoul.

a criminology major was something he’s always dreamed of, he’s always been interested in crime and laws and wanted to know how he could to help the city get safer — his plan was to be a police officer, but things changed along the way.

he was in his second year of college when he met her.

her name was ahreum, she was a new student in his class, moved colleges for whatever reason and she was now one of the many things that motivated him to attend classes.

they talked, talked a lot in and out of class, and eventually, he got the courage to ask her on a date. they walked around the city together, eating street food and drinking cheap beer, talking about their plans and hopes for the future, and that was when she mentioned the nis for the first time.

and with their first kiss, in front of her little apartment building by the end of the night, he got the realization that he wanted to be with her for life.

their relationship was one of the best things that could have happened to seojun, along with their studies and with the way things were happening in their lives. they were in their fourth year of college when she told him to join nis with her after they graduate, and his answer was obvious. that was all he ever wanted.

he was curious and interested in the job at nis ever since she first mentioned it, and the more they spent time together, more she would tell him about what she knew of the agency, convincing him that they should join together and get married further on in the future.

graduation was a dream come true for both of them, the ceremony and the party were events that they would never forget — not to mention the ring seojun gave ahreum when he asked her to be his fianceé; it wasn’t a diamond ring, but it was enough to make her cry and accept it.

and after graduating, the day to send their applications to the national intelligence service came and after the time provided until the results, their acceptation came and the training process began.

seojun found out a passion he never had explored before: physical combat, and that was the one thing he specialized himself on his training years, while his fianceé specialized herself on firearms, ahreum wanted to be a sniper.

once they were done with their training period, it was time for real missions, it was time to put in practice everything they learned during the two and a half trainee years.

everything was perfect, their relationship was stronger than ever and they loved their job at the agency, both being clandestine agents and sometimes they even got paired for missions together. they were doing what they loved right next to the person they loved.

and since the life as agents was tough and busy, they didn’t have much time to think and prepare for their wedding, so eventually, they just moved in together in seojun’s apartment. they were basically a married couple already.

but they didn’t see a tragedy coming after three years of service.

ahreum was shot during one of her missions, seojun was absent for a mission in japan and eventually got back to korea to the terrible news of her death. it felt like his life had gone with her, it felt like everything he ever wanted was taken away from him. he didn’t feel the ground underneath his feet anymore.

he was twenty-eight years old by that time, and after dealing with the funeral and seeing his fianceé lifeless in a fucking coffin made him decide it was time for a break from nis. it was time to meet his obligations and face enlistment, so he could occupy his mind with something other than missions that would constantly remind him of her.

he left to join the army, but willing to come back to his job once the twenty-one months of service was over.

he closed himself completely in the time he was out. he became a whole new person: he left behind the cheerful and passionate man he once was, to be the cold and indifferent, strict man that he is now.

it was a defense mechanism, a thick skin to protect himself from his own emotions.he comes back to nis when he’s thirty years old, wearing a cap to hide his shaved head ( he hates it ) and with a few more scars than when he left. he goes back to his position as an executive agent in the clandestine division, but also with a new function in his hands: he’s an instructor, training new agents and teaching them everything he learned when he was in their place.

he’s in charge of physical combat classes, sometimes with the use of cold steel, since it is what he’s best at, and he’s strict, could even be called a grumpy man but don’t ever say it in front of him.he’s bitter, he isn’t done mourning but he’ll never admit it.

:// ACCESSING PSYCHOLOGICAL EVALUATION …

seojun is a cold and hotheaded man. very strict when he’s wants something from someone, he demands perfectionism and hardwork from the trainees and he’s willing to give them a hard time in their training years. he’s good at working in teams despite having a short temper, he’s a leader by nature and makes sure everyone knows that. he does anything for his colleagues and is willing to kill for them and for the agency ( even though he has a difficulty dealing with death and murder ). out of work, he’s just a lonely and sad man, that drowns his sorrows in alcohol when he knows he doesn’t work the next day but will never admit it. deep inside, the cheerful and bright man that he once was is still there, taking his time to come back and bring to seojun the joy of life again. he’s passionate, comprehensive and gentle, but he has a thick and tough layer of anger blocking who he really is. he can be violent, impatient and impulsive for stupid reasons at times, mostly depending on how stressed he is, but he does his best to control himself. he seems intimidating, but in reality, he’s a nice and caring man.

… END OF FILE. CONTACT THE AGENT DIRECTLY FOR MORE.

[henry-hart]

Henry Danger Carnival/Fair Fic: Part 3

Dedicated to: @sunbeameyes @up-the-tube @youngbloodthekilljoy your feedback keeps me going. :)

Summary: The gang--Ray, Schwoz' and the kids (including Piper)--spend the day and most of the night at Swellview Fair.

A/N: This part was probably my favorite to write, and I know that because I wrote it so freaking fast. It was all just coming to me so easily and flowing really well. I hope you enjoy reading it as much as I enjoyed writing it! :))) xoxo

----------

"God, Ray threw up on the ride?" Henry asked, hardly able to get the question out through his laughter. He was imagining Ray puking all over one of the rides and the poor, unsuspecting people riding it.

Henry, Jasper, and Piper had met up with Charlotte, Schwoz and Ray at the funnel cake booth. Ray of course wasn't eating anything, and Charlotte wasn't sure she'd be able to eat anything all day thanks to Ray, but the others had worked up an appetite (a vicious bumper car battle tends to do that to a person), so they ordered a few funnel cakes and found an empty picnic table where they could eat them. Henry was next to Piper on one side, and Jasper and Charlotte were across from them on the other side. It was nice to have them all together and not in separate groups, especially since everyone was playing nice for the time being.  

Charlotte nodded grimly. "Yes, he did." She propped her elbow on the table and dropped her chin in her hand. "I'm glad you're laughing now because no one was laughing when it happened."

Henry gave her an apologetic look, but he still let out a string of small chuckles--not at Charlotte's expense, of course. Just Ray's (Ray had teased Henry about how he had acquired his now bruised nose since it had been a little kid who had hit his car so Henry wasn't against teasing Ray back). He had to quiet his laughter though because he had ordered his funnel cake with extra powdered sugar, and he didn't want to make it to go flying everywhere. He tried his best to be careful as he took a bite, but he couldn't help getting some on his face. 

Jasper smiled at Henry, gesturing to where the powder sugar was from his spot across from Henry; he had a little powder sugar at the tip of his nose. Jasper thought it was cute, but he didn't want Henry to walk around with it on his face all day. He dabbed a napkin in some water and reached forward to wipe it off gently, so as not to hurt Henry's already bruising nose. 

"Thanks," Henry smiled. 

Jasper nodded, blushing when he realized he had stretched across the table in front of everyone to wipe Henry's face. Henry didn't seem to mind. Neither did Charlotte, but Piper gave Jasper a knowing look and rolled her eyes. Jasper managed an awkward cough and started nervously fidgeting with his bucket. 

"What now?" Henry asked the group as he pushed his funnel cake towards Piper, who took a piece off to eat. Ray was already playing one of the games nearby--ring toss, by the looks of it, and Henry figured he'd offer to stick by Ray this time so Charlotte could have a chance to enjoy herself like the rest of them. "I'll take Ray this time around."

Charlotte gave Henry a relieved look. "Thank you," she breathed. She got up from the table, happy for the chance to be by herself--or at least away from Ray--but then she couldn't think what to do at a fair alone. She considered it for a moment and turned to Piper. "Wanna come with?"

"You have no idea," Piper answered immediately, glad for the break from her brother and his goofy friend. Charlotte was the only one of her brother's friends that Piper actually liked, and she just so happened to be another girl, which was something Piper greatly appreciated. She had been around too many boys today. She was glad for the chance at some girl time. 

Charlotte smiled, understanding exactly how Piper felt. Charlotte found herself in a party containing mostly guys more often than not, and she was constantly wishing for more female interaction. At work, she was the only girl, and the boys drove her crazy. Where everyone else was against Piper coming with them, Charlotte couldn't be happier. She needed a girl friend.

Henry looked to Charlotte to make sure she was positive in her choice to hang out with Piper rather than solitude. She gave him a reassuring nod, so Henry then turned to his sister. He stood up to pull some cash from his back pocket and handed it to her. 

Piper kept her hand with the cash in it suspended in the air, unsure how to react. She didn't know what to do with the money becuase she wasn't sure why Henry was giving it to her. "What's this for?" She frowned, thinking Henry was paying her to be nice to Charlotte or something--which was completely unnecessary. Piper liked Charlotte. 

"For you," Henry stated simply, "So you can have some money to buy whatever you want."

Okay, first he bought her tickets, and now he was giving her spending money? Why was Henry being so nice to her? It wasn't like she expected him to be horrible; Henry was a naturally nice person--which often infuriated Piper who had a short temper with most people--but now he was being specifically nice. To her. Why he was going such lengths to be so friendly and brotherly? She had been fighting with Jasper not too long ago, and Henry had ended up with another bloody nose because of it. She may not have been directly to blame, but the fault was still hers in the long run. He had every right to be mad at her not handing her money he earned. She suspected her parents had given Henry strict instructions to toe the line with her today.

"Thanks," she offered hesistantly, not really sure what else to say. Jasper's eyes widened at Piper's sincerity, but Henry just smiled and let her walk away with Charlotte. Piper was glad for that--Henry's indifference and casualness towards Piper's uncharacteristic behavior--because she didn't want a huge fuss about it. She put the money in the bag she was carrying around on her shoulder and continued walking. 

"So, now that we've ditched the boys, what do you want to do?" Charlotte asked once Henry and Jasper were no longer in sight. 

Piper looked at what was nearest to them to see if any of it looked interesting. She noticed a laser tag arena--and that only boys seemed to be going inside--so she nudged Charlotte's arm and pointed in that direction. "How about that?" Laser tag seemed like a good idea; she was in the mood to knock some cocky boys down a few pegs. 

Charlotte followed Piper's gaze and noticed just as Piper had that there wasn't a single girl walking through the doors. That just wouldn't do. 

She raised an eyebrow to Piper who smirked in return, and the two of them, arm in arm, approached the laser tag arena, ready to give some unsuspecting boys a little hell. 

----------

"That was nice of you," Jasper began when he and Henry had joined Ray and Schwoz near the ring toss. "To give Piper money, I mean."

Henry chuckled as Ray missed another bottle and had another of his temper-tantrums (the booth operator was loving Ray because all it took was a little taunting when Ray lost and he was forking over whatever money he had). "Yeah, well, I just want her to have fun without having to break her piggy bank."

"Piper has a piggy bank?" The idea of Piper having something as ordinary as a piggy bank was shocking to Jasper. He figured she kept her money in some vault or a safe or wherever evil little girls store their cash--not an innocent piggy bank.

"Maybe, I don't know." Henry shrugged one shoulder. "I just meant that she shouldn't have to pay for things when her brother has a job. Speaking of which--" he reached for his wallet again and pulled out some more cash. "Come on. This round of ring toss is on me." 

Jasper shook his head. "No, I can't let you pay for me. I have a job too--in the same place as you." Jasper had always admired Henry's generosity--it was one of his favorite things about Henry--but he didn't feel right having Henry pay for him as well as Piper. Sure, Jasper could understand why Henry was paying for her; she's his little sister. It makes sense--though Jasper wasn't sure he would do the same considering Piper's evil nature (Henry was a much better person than he). Still, Jasper has a paying job, something he wouldn't have without Henry, so it made Jasper feel guilty to let him pay for everything. "Really, man, it wouldn't feel right." Jasper continued. 

Henry snorted and waved Jasper's concerns away. "Don't sweat, it dude. You can just owe me a ride on the ferris wheel or something later." He gestured to the ferris wheel bucket full of tickets that Jasper was holding. 

Jasper looked down and smiled at Henry's reference to his bucket. "You sure?" 

Henry nodded, "Positive. Now let's go show Ray how to actually win at these games." He smirked. 

Jasper laughed, and they walked up to Ray who was now hounding Schwoz for money. 

"No," Schwoz protested, holding his money behind his back while trying to get away from Ray at the same time. "This is mine!" 

"I'm the one who signs your paycheck, so technically it's mine!" Ray contended. He tried to reach behind Schwoz, but Schwoz made up for in speed what he lacked in height, and Ray failed spectacularly. "What are you even saving it for! You haven't done anything except buy shaved ice!" 

Schwoz scowled. "I don't have to explain what I do with my money to you." He stuck his bottom lip out in a pout. "And I would do something, but they won't let me on the rides." He lamented, taking an embarassed pause. "I'm too short."

Ray stopped his nagging, suddenly conscience-stricken for only thinking of himself whilst Schwoz was denied fun for something he couldn't control. Schwoz probably hadn't fun since they'd arrived at the fair. Ray backed away and let out a heavy sigh, knowing what he had to do but not feeling too excited about it. 

"Look, Schwoz," he began slowly, focusing on the words so that they would actually come out. "I will go with you to the rides so they'll let you on." Schwoz immediately perked up, but Ray held a hand up to stop him from interjecting. "If you pay for one more round. I just--I know I can win this time. I can feel it."

Schwoz narrowed his eyes, mulling Ray's suggestion over. He didn't really want to put any money towards Ray's ridiculous obsession with winning the stupid game, but he did want to ride on something more exciting than the merry-go-round. It wasn't that he didn't enjoy it because he did; he loved all the pretty, painted horses and the twinkling lights and the soft music. What he didn't like was all the staring. Granted, the people his age that were on the ride were there because they had kids--which he did not--but that still wasn't any reason to stare at Schwoz like he was being a creep. He was just genuinely enjoying the carousel. 

That experience plus the fact that he was repeatedly denied because of his height had wounded his self-esteem, so he grabbed a five from his wallet and smacked it onto the counter. 

"Ha ha!" Ray exclaimed, greedily grabbing the money. He held it up to the booth operator's face with a smug grin. The operator didn't look too impresed (he had seen Ray spend 30 dollars on a 1 dollar game just to lose every time), but he gave Ray the rings anyway. Ray pointed to a plush hippo stuffed animal that was hanging in the prizes' section. "You're mine."

Henry and Jasper watched eagerly from the side, curious to see if Ray would really win this time. 

Ray stepped back and knelt as he took a deep, calming breath. He was trying to find his center. He was not going to be made a fool by some haughty, condescending guy running a ring toss game. 

He walked back up to the booth with a more relaxed approach this time, determinded to get his plush hippo. He pulled his right arm up and across his chest, angling his wrist to make the perfect flick motion that would send the ring out and sailing towards the neck of the bottles in a perfect trajectory. 

As Henry watched Ray meticulously prepare to throw the ring, he had to stifle his laughter--especially when, after all his effort, he still missed every single time.  

Ray exploded, all since of dignity gone with the last ring he tossed and missed. "This whole thing is rigged! You don't want me to win. You just want to take my money!" He stuck an accusatory finger in the worker's face. "You and your high horse. How do you sleep at night?" Ray turned around to face Henry and Jasper and Schwoz too quickly to see that the worker was laughing at him. "Don't even waste your time." He grumbled to Henry who was lining up to play next. "They obviously made it so that no one can win."

Henry nodded his head in a mocking gesture, playing it up for Ray to think that he agreed. He of course didn't. He knew Ray was just ridiculous and childish when he didn't get his way. 

Henry sent a mischievous smile Jasper's way before handing a five to the worker. He grabbed the rings he paid for and, with none of the preparation Ray took, but with agility heightened by his superpower and a naturally accurate capability to aim, Henry flicked the rings. 

One by one, every single ring hit the mark, perfectly spinning around the neck of a bottle. 

Ray was so indignant, he couldn't even look at Henry (it was probably for the best because Henry face was set in a cocky smirk). He just silently fumed by himself to the side of the booth, anger and scorn radiating off of him like he was nuclear.

The worker asked Henry which prize he would like, and Henry, ever the good sport, chose the blue hippo he had noticed Ray coveted to use in efforts to placate the pouting man.

"Here," he good-naturedly offered to Ray, who still wasn't looking at him. 

Ray peeked over his shoulder to see what Henry was trying to give him, and he couldn't help but cave when he saw what it was. He took the hippo from Henry, but he refused to smile and hurt his pride anymore. He would accept this gift, but he wasn't going to be happy about it.

Henry didn't mind. He knew that Ray was happy to have the hippo. In fact, Henry figured, seeing as he had a knack for these carnival games, he might as well win a stuffed animal for all his friends--especially Schwoz who had nothing to show for his time at the fair besides an empty shaved ice cup.

Henry eyed a pink pig stuffed animal. "Hey, Schwoz," he called. Schwoz stopped petting Ray's hippo and looked to Henry. "This one's for you." 

Schwoz' face lit up as Henry once again made all the rings land around around the bottles.

----------

Piper hid behind one of the black wall props in the laser tag arena, waiting for the unsuspecting boy to come around the corner and meet his eminent doom--or at least to have his laser sensor shot with Piper's laser gun. The neon lights provided enough light for her to see when someone was coming, and the electronic music blasting from the speakers made her heart race in excitement.

She and Charlotte had been playing for about 45 minutes now, and they were unstoppable. The boys had no idea what hit them when the two showed up ready for business. The look on the group's face when they realized that they were taken down by two girls was priceless. 

Piper and Charlotte had planned to only play one round figuring that would be empowering enough, but after that first round, they were hooked. Piper would be content staying there all for the rest of the day, honestly.

She was having actual, real fun. 

She couldn't help it; she and Charlotte made the perfect team. Charlotte had the accuracy with the gun, and her intelligence made her the perfect strategist. She would plan an attack that made it possible for two people to take out a group of ten, and the plans worked flawlessly every time. 

Piper, on the other hand, was the ruthless one, obviously. She had stealth and drive on her side. She moved silently and would hide, her patience outlasting that of her opponents', so that at the perfect moment, she could strike, inflicting maximum causalties--or whatever the laser tag equivalent was for completely dominating the opposing teams. 

So, given their independent skill sets, they decided Charlotte would stay on the upper level because of her great aim, and Piper would work the ground level because of her vicious nature, benefiting them singularly and as a tag-team.

Piper was currently in position now. This particular group they were facing had fifteen versus the usual ten, but it didn't matter because of the power of word of the mouth.

The boys from all the previous rounds left talking about the people who beat them the way people talk about phantom ghost stories. They talked Piper and Charlotte up to be assassin spy level. The boys were scared of them before even walking through the door. It was incredible.

Piper liked having that fear factor; it made her feel powerful.

She had to hold back a snicker when she saw the boy she was waiting on come around the corner, gun in front of him--but not in position to fire. He was cradling it against him like he expected to actually be physically attacked. 

This was exhilarating.

Piper jumped from behind the wall, gun at the ready, cackling wildly when the boy--who looked older than her--screamed and dropped his gun, hightailing it for the exit. 

He was lighting up the walls and floor as he ran, confirming to Piper that she had shot true. Her laser had made its way to the sensor on his breastplate.

Piper knew his other teammates would've heard his shriek before they saw his sensor's blinking lights, and she was glad. It would help add to the building suspense Charlotte and Piper had. 

She crept silently back behind the wall and into her ready position, waiting for the next unfortunate boy to round that corner.

Piper was in her element.

She had found her place. 

Charlotte was in a similar place of elation. 

She was working less with the groundwork and stealth; she was more working from the higher levels, using the high vantage point to pick off people from the group one by one the way a sniper would.

She had to admit that, though it was just lasers and lights and sensors strapped to everyone's chest, she was pumped full of adrenaline and having the time of her life. 

She wasn't even that mad anymore about having to clean up a vomit-covered Ray.

She took all her anger out rather on the cocky boys who came strutting in expecting a quick victory but were met with swift defeat instead. 

Charlotte was perched in the corner of the balcony that faced the entrance and exit; this way, she could size the people up as soon as they walked in the door and properly assess how to take them out.

A particularly large group walked in next, and Charlotte smiled wickedly to herself. 

They stopped near the door, no doubt discussing their strategy. Charlotte knew they would come for the balcont first. Everyone always did. The idea of having the second floor claimed for your team was too good to pass up.

But she didn't worry about anyone trying to fight her for the balcony. That's what Piper was for.

She was stationed below Charlotte, and with Piper's battle persona, there was no way anyone would make it up there. Charlotte pitied anyone who tried.

Piper was a formiddable opponent by all standards.

Charlotte was glad she was working with Piper instead of against.

She caught motion from near the door. The group was moving again having worked out what they were going to do.

She aimed her laser gun at the first boy to break from the group's sensor, holding her breath to steady herself, and fired. His chest plate lit up like the fourth of July as she hit the mark prefectly, effectively eliminating him from the game (Charlotte was amazed by how well the lasers worked--especially from such a long range). The boy threw his hands up in anger before storming out of the room. The rest of the group starting looking around more carefully, trying to find the source of the sneak attack. 

One boy, an older looking one, broke away in front to lead. He was making his way in towards the stairs to the balcony, but what he didn't know was that he was also walking right in the direction of Piper.

Charlotte took her aim off of him, figuring she'd let him be taught why Piper has the reputation she does. 

A shrill scream thirty seconds later told her that the boy had just been given his first lesson. 

Charlotte found herself giggling--quietly--and she was so thankful that Henry had asked Piper to come along. She was enjoying this laser tag game more than she'd enjoyed anything in awhile, and she knew that part of the reason was that she was playing with Piper, a girl, her friend. 

She loved Henry and Jasper and Ray--and even Schwoz--but Charlotte needed a female friend. Piper was perfect.

The group of fifteen--now down to thirteen and missing a leader--scattered without someone to give them a clear plan of attack. Charlotte and Piper had not only a clear plan but a silent, working connection. They were unstoppable, and those unlucky thirteen weren't gonna make it out of there without a personal taste of how rad two girls with a couple of laser guns can be. 

Bring it on.

----------

A/N Part 2: Charlotte x Piper's laser tag scene was SO MUCH FUN to write. It reads kind of like a battle sequence or something, but I like that because those two are bada**. It's what they deserve. I know laser tag works on a point system, but I liked the idea of everyone who was shot by Piper x Charlotte having to completely leave the room. lolol I'm gonna give Ray some good™ content in the next part. I promise. I haven't done much in his perspective, and I want to. Anyway, tell me what you thought! I'm thinking there's probably gonna be two more parts? Probably? That's not definite though bc I change things as I write all the time. Thank you for reading! xoxo

[catlady1986]

Guilty Pleasure

Chapters: 2/?  Fandom: Final Fantasy XV Rating: Teen And Up Audiences  Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings  Relationships: Gladiolus Amicitia/Noctis Lucis Caelum Characters: Gladiolus Amicitia,  Noctis Lucis Caelum, Prompto Argentum, Ignis Scientia, background characters Tags: Romance, Secret Relationship, Older/Younger Lovers, Prejudice, Student/Teacher Relationship, more later

Note: This one is longer than the last, had a lot to add to this part. If it comes off as too wordy or doesn’t flow well let me know and I’ll fix it. Also, the rating will go up next chapter. ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡ – ✧) Thank you and enjoy!

Previous Next

The sound of his doorbell ringing relentlessly finally annoys Noctis into waking up, grumbling as he slides out of bed. He finds his friends on the other side of his door, them smiling and looking at him with intrigue.

“You both are jerks for ditching me.” Noctis snaps and then yawns.

“Aw, don’t be like that,” Prompto chuckles and slings an arm around his shoulder as they head inside, then gives a wink. “I bet you still had a good time without us there, maybe met someone nice?”

He did, but wait, does that mean-

“I brought you some hotcakes I made this morning.” Ignis says and hands him a Tupperware container.”

“Oh, thanks Iggy.” Noctis grabs a fork and stands against his counter, digging in and looking to his friends, them staring again with intrigue. “What?”  

“So tell us, what’d you do after we left? Did you meet anyone new by chance?”

Noctis furrows his brows. His stomach begins to knot and a pang of dejection washes over him. Gladio hadn’t come over to him of his own volition, he was asked to. But something didn’t add up, he hasn’t told his friends yet that his preferences lean towards men. Hell, he just realized only a few months ago after falling hard for a male teacher he assisted. So how and why was Gladio chosen?

The black-haired man sighs while shaking his head then gives them a pointed look before taking another bite. “Yeah, I did. Guess that was your doing?”

“Oh come on bud, don’t be mad. We just wanted you to have some fun.”

“I don’t need you two to set me up on pity dates.”

“I’m sorry Noct. We thought it would help you out.” Ignis says, looking a tad remorseful. “You’re terribly shy and don’t leave our sides when out.”

“Yeah! You get really awkward and standoffish around people” Prompto chimes in.

“Plus she’s a nice young lady, just started as a receptionist at my office.”

Noctis freezes. She? The person they tried hooking him up with was a woman? So then Gladio wasn’t asked to flirt with him. He liked him for himself. This makes Noct grin smugly.

“Huh, guess you guys were wrong about me then.”

“Wait, so you met someone else?” the blonde asks, eyes widening comically. “Dude, who? Was she hot?”

“Not telling.”

“Aw, don’t be a jerk.”

“So you didn’t meet with Jessenia? Oh dear, I’m going to have to write her an apology note then. Maybe some flowers, box of chocolates too.” the glasses-wearing man says and puts a reminder on his phone.

“Come on Noct, don’t leave your bros hanging. Tell us what she was like, did you get her number? Are you two meeting up again.” Prompto asks and nudges his friend.

“Again, not telling.”

Prompto lets out an overblown whine as Ignis goes stonefaced like he’s deep in thought. Then a subtle bit of irritation flashes onto his face before his stoic mask is back on.

“It’s a man, isn’t it?”

“Wha?” Is Prompto’s reaction, looking between his two friends.

Noctis stops eating, his face turning a deep red color and eyes down-turning to the floor. Leave it to Ignis to somehow ass pull the correct assumption even though he’s usually terrible at reading the atmosphere.

He sighs and sets the container down, knowing he’s going to end up losing his appetite after the incoming barrage.

“Yeah.”

“What? Noct are you- Umm- So you're uh.” Prompto stutters before shaking his head, looking slightly hurt at his friend. “Why didn’t you tell us?”

“I- I really only discovered it recently myself. I thought that maybe it was just a one-time feeling but the guy I met last night, we had a connection. Sorry, I should have said something sooner.”

The blonde smiles and softly knocks his friend in the shoulder with his fist. “It’s all right dude, just next time talk to us about it. Right, Iggy?”

“Uh, yes, sure.” the man says, shifting about then giving a friendly smile. “We will always support you Noct, even if the information is, surprising.”

“Thanks, you guys.”

“So now that is out,” Prompto begins and nudges his friend like before. “what did he look like?”

Noctis chuckles softly. “As cliche as it is he was tall, dark, and handsome. Really nice too, we played pool and chatted for a while.”

“What’s his name? Does he work? Where does he live?” Ignis grills the younger man.

Noct can’t help but roll his eyes. “His name is Gladio, he works at a bookstore, and lives with his parents but is saving money to move out. He said they’re really strict.”

“How old is he?”

“Early to mid-twenties, I believe.”

The sandy-haired man’s eyebrows arch up. “And he lives with his parents still?”

“Iggy, I lived with my dad until I was twenty. Enough with the interrogation.”

“Just worried about you, you don’t know who this young man really is. For all you know he could be a prostitute or a thief preying on naive people.”

“Jeez, thanks Igs.” Noctis huffs. “If he was any of those, wouldn’t he have tried to come home with me last night?”

“That’s true.” Prompto says and gives Ignis a nudge. “Cut him some slack, this guy may actually be genuine and bring our awkward dork out of his shell.”

“Wow, I feel so loved.”

“Very well. So what do you have planned for the day?”

“Pick up my pants and blazer from the dry cleaners. Then I’m going to go over the syllabus’ for my classes tomorrow.”

“I see. Would you like for me to come over then and help you look over it? I can make us dinner?”

“You don’t have to, besides today is your day off since you got dragged in yesterday. Enjoy it and lounge around your apartment, be lazy.”

“That is a waste of time when I could be doing something fruitful.”

“And that is why you got an ulcer.”

Ignis sighs and shakes his head. “Fine, I will try to relax.”

“Well, I think it’s time for me to scoot.” Prompto says and flashes a big smile at his friend. “Congrats buddy, hope things work out for you, I mean it.”

“Thanks, Prompto.”

“I should be leaving as well, need to stop by the grocer, running low on Ebony. Have a splendid day Noct.”  

“You too, see ya.”

The two men begin to leave but Ignis stops and turns back around at his friend, staring intently at his face.

“I do hope you plan on shaving, it wouldn’t be professional for you to look unkempt on your first day.”

“Yeah, yeah, I know.” he says and waives his friend off.

Noctis sighs and leans against his island counter, shaking his head. While it wasn’t how he had planned coming out if it proved to be true, at least it wasn’t as bad as he thought. Although there is still his father. He tosses the container into the sink and looks at his wallet, seeing a white note sticking out of it. Gladio’s number. Should he possibly try to call him? No, he may be in trouble if his parents are as strict as he said and Gladio did say to call him later. He does wonder though if he is all right, he seemed nervous when he said his parents were coming for him. Maybe he should- no, he’ll wait.

So Noct gets going for the day, taking a quick shower, then gets dressed and starts to head out. He glances at the note again, feeling a fluttering sensation in his belly and his chest become tight.

While out, he finds that his mind constantly wanders back to the young man, especially when he catches a glimpse of someone tall with brown hair or hears a deep rumbling laughter. Noct feels ridiculous, like a love-struck teen who can’t wait to see their crush after being away from them for a day. He tries to clear his head however when he arrives at the dry cleaners, he sees a bookstore down the street, remembering that Gladio works at one and should be there. Would it seem stalkerish if he stopped by to see if Gladio worked there?

Throwing caution to the wind, Noctis heads into the bookstore after picking up his items, scouring about but not finding the young man and then learning from a clerk Gladio didn’t work there. A bit downtrodden, he heads back to his car and goes to leave, but stops and looks at his phone. Maybe he could see if there were any other bookstores nearby, he could check them out, see if the young man is there and find out how he is doing.

Well, there is apparently way more bookstores then he initially thought and there was no way he could stop at them all. That would be too stalkerish and a waste of gas. So he decides to just check out the closet ones and if Gladio is not at any of them he’ll just leave it at that. He does really want to see him again though so he hopes for the best. Not at the first, nor the second, or the third. Noctis sighs deeply as he sits outside the fourth, a quaint little bookstore that isn’t like all the chain stores with their bland decorum while trying to be hip with the younger generation.

Noctis heads inside and gets a strong earthy scent along with a hint of flowers; the smell reminds him of Gladio. His heart begins to pound in his chest and he begins trembling from nerves. A female clerk walks by and smiles at him, before greeting the older man.

“Hi, anything I could help you with today?”

“Oh umm, b, by chance is there a uh, a young man named Gladio that works umm here?” he says, trying to act normal and not like a flustered dork.

The young woman gives him a once-over, then goes wide-eyed and smiles. “Just a second.” she says and scurries off to the back.

Noctis can feel his chest tighten, he becomes sweaty and nervous. Then the man steps out from the backroom. It’s like one of those cheesy scenes in the movies where the main character’s love interest enters the room and everything around them freezes while they continue to move, all the attention focused on them. But then Noctis feels his heart drop as Gladio looks at him; he doesn’t look at him with annoyance or disgust, he has a soft smile on his face along with woe. One of his cheeks was bruised and swollen like he had been hit. Despite that, Gladio still gives him that sweet look like he had the night before, making Noctis cheeks heat up.

“Hey, fancy meeting you here.”

“Yeah, I was in the area so I uh stopped in.” Noctis says and chuckles embarrassedly. “See if you by chance worked here.”

“Huh, lucky guess. Must be fate.” Gladio says and flashes a flirty look at the older man.

Noct feels his heart thump rapidly. “Yeah.” He looks up at the young man and smiles before furrowing his brows, reaching his hand up to cup his swollen cheek. “Were you hit?”

“Oh, that? No, I got angry and slammed my door shut, it knocked a plaque I had hanging over the frame down. Dumbass me just stood there and watched it fall before it thwacked me on the face.”

Noctis frowns. He doesn’t believe him, he’d seen similar things and heard similar excuses from kids being abused. But Gladio wasn’t a kid, so it’s not like he could call child services. So he dejectedly lets it go.

“So how badly are you grounded? No tv or phone?”

“No dessert too.” Gladio snorts. “It wasn’t too bad, just a lot of yelling and door slamming. Plus I have to stay at my mother’s on the weekends since my dad is at work and can’t ‘babysit’ me.”

“You really do need to get your own place, that sounds horrible.”

“Yeah, in time.” he says and bites his lip. “So I uh get done in a couple hours, would you maybe wanna get a bite to eat with me?”

“Are you even allowed too?”

“Yeah, my mom lets me have a bit more freedom then my dad does. Plus I usually get something to eat on my way home so if I’m late she doesn’t fuss.”

“Ah, okay. Where would you like to meet up?”

“There’s a diner by the bus stop down a few blocks, that sound good?”

“Yeah, sounds great.” Noctis says and smiles as his cheeks rosy. Then a thought strikes him. “Oh, since you’re staying at your mother’s on the weekend, I can give you my number then.”

“Sure. I can use the house phone so my calls can’t be monitored by my dad.”

Noctis quickly scribbles his number down onto the back of a receipt he had stuffed into his pocket and hands it over, exchanging bashful smiles. They say their goodbyes with Gladio heading back to work and Noct deciding instead of going all the way back home he’ll kill time by putzing around the nearby mall. Maybe he’ll look into some new ties while there.

An hour goes by and his phone begins to vibrate, an unknown number flashing across his screen. He’s apprehensive at first but answers it anyway.

“Hello?”

“Oh! Awesome! So you didn’t give me a fake number.” Gladio chuckles from the other end. “Hey uh, business is kinda slow so Karis is letting me leave early. Wanted to let you know I’m heading over, if you don’t mind eating around five.”

“That’s fine, I’ll stop by and pick you up. I’m over at the mall.”

“Yeah, okay, see you then.”

A wave of giddiness overcomes him. He hasn’t felt this excited since his early twenties when he and his then-girlfriend went out for the first time. That was the last time he dated or felt attracted to a woman. She broke his heart badly. Hopefully, it ends up better this time around.

Noctis finds Gladio waiting outside the bookstore and picks him up, them bantering awkwardly and flirtatiously as they head to the diner. But as they arrive, the younger man’s face goes white, his eyes widen and he bites his lower lip before quickly shifting his large frame out of sight.

“Shit.”

“Gladio? What’s wrong?”

“My fucking stepmother is there with my sister and stepbrothers.”

Noctis furrows his brows and looks through the large windows of the diner, spotting a middle-aged woman with three kids. He looks down at Gladio and catches the slight look of fear and brokenness in his eyes along with his panicked breathing, it making Noct’s stomach turn for some reason he can’t quite put his finger on. Without a word, he puts the car in reverse and drives away but Gladio remains in his hunkered over position, his breathing still frantic. In a move that would send Ignis into a tizzy, he pulls one hand away from the steering wheel and gently touches Gladio’s cheek before petting his hair. This seems to do the trick and his breathing returns to normal before sitting back up with a sigh.

“Gladio?” Noct asks with deep concern.

“Sorry, I have bad anxiety. I was afraid she’d catch us together.”

Noctis looks to him with remorse and gently rests his hand against his face again. “You want to go someplace else or do you want me to drop you off at your mother’s?”

“If, if it’s alright with you,” Gladio begins and turns to look at him, his amber eyes looking harrowed. “could we stop someplace secluded? I want to cool my head before I go home, I’ll give you gas money too.”

“You don’t have to give me money, I’ll do it. I used to take this one kid out for ice cream after school because he didn’t want to go home until his mother got done with work. Found out the neighbor that was watching him had been touching him inappropriately.”

“Ah, you sound like one of those do-gooders you read about it the paper.”

Noctis smiles. “Yeah, I like helping people. Even though I get really shy and flustered at first, I still try my best.”

“Wish there were more people like you out there in the world, maybe it wouldn’t be so rotten.”

Noct quickly glances at Gladio, noticing the pained look on his face. A thought pops into his head that would kill two birds with one stone. “Hey, I live not far from here. Why don’t we stop at my place and I’ll order out. That way you can clear your head.”

A soft blush forms on the brunette's cheeks. “Oh, yeah, that sounds good.”

Noctis continues to drive until he arrives at the carport for his apartment complex, shutting the vehicle off though neither exits right yet.

“Hey, thanks Noctis.” Gladio says and looks over at the black-haired man, smiling fondly. “Seems my gamble going and talking to you last night didn’t end in a mess.” His smile grows into one of teasing. “Or my dead corpse dumped in the river.”

“You thought I could’ve been a serial killer?” Noctis laughs.

“Hmm, people never suspect the cute ones.” Gladio’s eyes half lid as he looks at the older man, a sliver of a pink tongue swiping across his dry lips. “Hey umm, Noct?”

“Hmm?”

“Can I, can I kiss you?”

The thirty-year-old’s heart pounds in his chest and his body begins to tremble. Kiss? He hasn’t kissed anyone in years, not since his girlfriend. Will he still any good at it? Is Gladio teasing him? Is it too soon? Should he say no, that he wants to wait? His mind continues to race, even as his body begins moving on its own, leaning towards the young man who tilts his head.

Their lips brush momentarily before pressing them together in a tender kiss. It feels exhilarating and he wants more. Noctis rests his palms against Gladio’s cheeks, deepening the kiss that becomes needy and carnal, large tan hands gripping him around his waist. Tongues explore about in each other's mouths and dance about together, soft moans escaping out until Noct gasps when he gets cupped through his pants.

Blue eyes stare deeply into brown, both filled with lust, as the two pant quickly and continue to hold each other. Noctis is the first to pull back, opening his door and stepping out but he pulls Gladio with him, then he pins him to the side, capturing his lips once again as the younger man runs his hands down his back before gripping his ass. Noctis pulls back once again, their lips separating and making a loud smack, and takes hold of Gladio’s hand leading him towards the elevator. He has never done anything like this before but the feelings he’s experiencing are intoxicating and he wants more, wants to feel the pleasure of doing something scandalous. Taboo.  

[thelastgoodluthor]

What if home is a person (who isn’t here anymore)?

“Quit it.” Lena swatted at the hand ruffling her hair, shooting a glare up at her assailant with narrowed eyes.

“C’mon, Lena. I don’t have any hair left, I have to take some liberties with you.” Lex joked with a boyish grin. It didn’t quite sit on his face right anymore, Lena couldn’t help but note. He wasn’t a lanky teenager anymore, and though he was only in his early twenties he looked far more mature than that, a combination of his bald head - male pattern baldness ran in the Luthor genes, apparently, and at the first sign of a bald patch Lex had resignedly shaved it all off - and the fact that he had filled out since graduating college and moving on to take over LuthorCorp. Lena didn’t know where he found the time to work out considering he was constantly working on this project and that at the company.

“It’s not my fault I’m not a real member of the family to be cursed with a cue ball.” Lena joked, rolling her eyes immediately at the slightly concerned look Lex shot her. “It’s a joke, Lex.” She grumbled, turning back to her laptop. Lillian’s barbed remarks about her not being a ‘real Luthor’ had rooted themselves in her psyche - the easiest way to combat them was to use them herself. The more she used her real parentage as an armour, the less Lillian could use it to hurt her.

Lex let out a small huff halfway between an annoyed grunt and an amused laugh, as if he couldn’t quite decide how he was supposed to feel about her self-deprecation. “Stop working and pay attention to me.” He pouted over-dramatically, earning a roll of Lena’s eyes again as she kept focused on her assignment. “It’s the winter break, even I didn’t do extra credit over the holidays.”

“Well, we can’t all be the golden boy, some of us have to put the extra work in.” She muttered under her breath. Her grades put her at the top of her classes, she was involved in every extra-curricular that would look good on her CV and cement her as an obnoxious over-achiever. But that was never quite enough for Lillian.

Lex stayed silent for a moment, sensing he had hit a nerve, before moving to shut the laptop lid - Lena just barely moving her fingers in time before it closed. “It’s Christmas, and I rarely get to see you.” He muttered, and she felt a small stab of guilt. With Lena halfway across the country at MIT, and Lex swamped at LuthorCorp, they had so little time to see each other. She finally looked up to see the same guilt swimming in Lex’s eyes, forcing Lena to give in with a small sigh as she moved the laptop to the side, kicking her feet up into Lex’s lap and earning her another grin.

“Why aren’t you at the gala with mother?” She questioned. She had gotten herself out of it, begging assignment deadlines that didn’t exist. Lillian had scoffed, noting her apparent laziness at having left it to the last minute and not caring enough to question why anything was due so soon after the holiday.

“Didn’t know I would be able to get here in time for it. I phoned saying I was going to be in late and too jet-lagged to be good company. She was very understanding.” He muttered absently as he picked up the remote to flick on the TV. Lena had to hide the brief flash of anger she felt at the thought - how Lillian would accept anything Lex said easily, give him everything, yet anything Lena did was an inconvenience.

“Besides, I’d rather spend time with you.” Lex told her with a small smile. “I know I’ve been... distant.” He muttered, and Lena couldn’t find it in her to offer any platitude. This was the first Christmas in four years he had gotten away from work to attend at the Luthor Manor in Smallville, meaning Lena and Lillian had been left alone with each other. It was easier when she started attending college, as she could beg back to her dorm as soon as she wished, but it had been torture in the last two years of high school with the strict vacation dates for boarding school. In that time, when Lex did bother to call, he seemed constantly distracted. All Lena had to do was turn on the news to know why.

She noticed Lex’s jaw tense imperceptibly, the temple in his forehead flickering with tension as he landed on a news channel, heralding the very reason for his constant distraction. She looked to the screen, a tired, weary feeling settling in her chest at the sight of the red cape and blue suit of Metropolis’ saviour. “Lex.” She whispered carefully, but he couldn’t seem to tear his gaze away from the TV. She leaned over to pry the remote from his hand, changing the channel quickly to some cooking show in the background.

Lex seemed to blink out of whatever haze the sight of the Kryptonian had put him in, giving Lena an apologetic look as he turned back to her. “I’m sorry, it’s just... he’s...” He took in a frustrated breath, a fire appearing in his eyes Lena had never seen before. “He’s dangerous. And none of them... they refuse to see it.” He muttered darkly.

“I know.” Lena assured, a bitter taste settling at the back of her throat at the lie as she scooted closer to pull her brother into a hug, the force of it crinkling the fine lines of his suit he hadn’t changed out of since he got home. “It’s okay.” She assured him, though she knew it wasn’t. She didn’t understand Lex’s hatred of Superman, and the light in his eyes when he spoke of the Kryptonian, of other aliens and their attempts to take from humanity their world frightened her. More and more he sounded like their mother, sometimes even worse, and Lena felt like he was slipping away from her piece by piece.

Lex remained silent, his head bowed as his jaw worked to grind his teeth in frustration. “Don’t think about it right now, okay?” She muttered, pressing a light kiss to his forehead, offering him a wan smile. “C’mon, mom won’t be home ‘til late - she can’t tell us off for watching bad Christmas movies and eating all the leftovers.” She offered, grinning when her efforts earned her a small tick of Lex’s lips - not quite the smile he was sporting earlier, but close enough.

“Okay, but no Love Actually or White Christmas.” He said, until Lena gave him a hurt look to make him relent with a mutter of ‘fine, but only one of them’. She got up with a grin to find the DVD, Lex going to grab as much food as the two of them could manage. As Lena settled back into his side in front of the TV, she felt content, the moment reminiscent of when she was still a child and Lex had just newly become her big brother, trying to make her feel at home in a place that felt too big and imposing to be welcoming.

But Lex had always been the brightest spot in it, so eager to have a sibling he could impart wisdom on, someone he could protect and act as an idol for. Lena had worshipped him from the moment she became a Luthor and had been eager to follow his every step. Even with the tired set of his eyes, the way his words could become cold and clipped when he spoke of Superman or alien immigration, the way his smile seemed odd on his face nowadays, she still wanted to emulate him. With the glow of the TV reflecting off his face, a grimace at having ‘given in’ to his sister’s demands for the movie betrayed by a small smile tugging at his lips, Lena was reminded of how desperately she had wanted a family after her birth mother died, and how happily Lex had filled that role for her.

She didn’t realise it would be the last Christmas she got to spend with her brother, before he got buried under work again and eventually his calls stopped completely. She didn’t realise the next one would be spent alone, avoiding calls from journalists, talking to her mother and brother through attorneys, as the fallout of his trial played on the news for weeks on end.

She didn’t realise it was the last Christmas she would get to be happy.

[untitledfantasy-blog]

Does Having a Personal Trainer Guarantee Success

Burn Fats Fast: Does Having a Personal Trainer Guarantee Success in Achieving Weight Loss?

Access to personal training is no longer something deemed exclusive to a certain group of people. It is a common sight today to see somebody training alongside with a personal trainer in the gym. If you have just embarked on a weight loss program and are not so sure how best to ensure your time spent in the gym translates into real effective calories blasting workout, hiring a personal trainer may help you with the initial efforts.

If assuming all trainers have the right credentials, does it make any difference to which one I pick as my trainer eventually? Rightfully, this should be the case but I have the experience of having 3 personal trainers in the past so I guess I can share with you how different trainer delivered their training and what are the traits that differentiate a good trainer from your average ones.

If you have more or less already decided that you are going to hire a trainer, before you do that, it will be wise of you to observe how some trainers conduct their training and interact with their client while you are working out at the gym. A good trainer should be able to customize the type of exercise you need in order to help you achieve your overall fitness goals. Although the broad objective is to whip yourself back in shape, a good trainer has to know if you need for e.g. to strengthen your arms/core or correct your posture etc.

Before I go on to describe the trainers I have met in the gym, one obvious method to do your initial screening is probably to gauge the physique of the trainer. Of course we should not be expecting them to look like the hulk but at the very least, the trainer should cut a lean and fit figure. I did come across a few who are flabby and fat enough to make me wonder how are they able to help me achieve my goals when they cannot seem to portray the image of fitness. One more important thing to note is that these trainers should have the right and recognized credentials as most should be armed with basic nutritional knowledge on top of being able to provide training safely with the right methods and equipment to avoid injuries.

Below are 3 types of trainers I have broadly classified based on my personal observation:-

Type 1: Irresponsible, avoid at all cost! I have seen trainers who chit chat with their clients. Although personal training is also about building trust and relationship with clients as part of customer service to better help them achieve their goals, it is simply not acceptable to engage in conversation throughout the workout session and not concentrating if proper form is executed and correct intensity level is being applied during the training. (After all, if you can talk comfortably throughout the training, it probably means you are not working hard enough.) I have come across one trainer who was more interested in "grooming" himself in front of the full length mirror than supervising if his client was working out correctly. He stood there for a good ten minutes to examine his face and guess what? to squeeze his pimples, eew! Isn't that gross? That is not forgetting that he regularly fidgeted with his mobile phone more than anything else. Please give your business to someone else!

Type 2: Going through the motion. I would say my 3rd trainer sort of belonged to this category. What differentiated his training offered from my first two trainers was the program was not your normal weights and cardio training, it was the TRX training. I reckon the suspension training system itself does have its merits in helping you shave off those extra fats as the results were almost immediate. Why did I say this? That's because after the training session, I would check the results using the body weight analysis machine and it was miraculous. You can see an immediate difference although not very significant (after just 20 minutes for the first free trial session) in the increase in your muscle mass. I was totally convinced it worked.

I must say that I was pretty pleased with the results after my 10 session package. As the types of training performed on the suspension system gets tougher, I can only grit my teeth and pray for the last set to be completed as drops of perspiration began forming on my forehead and started streaming down. At no point did he provide any encouragement to finish the last few reps. A little motivation goes a long way in helping me push through the last few reps. As I would be alternated to continue my training on cardio machines, he did not make any explanation on how to select the appropriate program on the machine. Diet wise, the only instruction he had was to give carbohydrates a wide berth. He told me to avoid rice especially as it is fattening which is of course not very good advice. My conclusion for this trainer was that he is probably apt at delivering his training session with the suspension system but was lacking in the area of diet and nutrition and certainly not providing enough encouragement and motivation for the trainee.

My 2nd trainer fitted the bill as well. His program was the normal weights and cardio type. He was more into weights than cardio. He was attentive enough to ensure proper form and posture whilst dealing with how I executed the training with weights (machine and free weights) along with occasional words of encouragement to finish the last few repetitions if he realized that I was struggling. He preferred to dedicate the entire session to doing weights and would request me to train on my own on any cardio machine I like for 30 minutes without specifying any program details like intensity level. I guess it was typical for somebody to choose and teach only certain areas or fields the he is apt.

The other grouse I had was the advice he had dished for diet control. Similar to trainer no. 3, he seemed to be lacking in this area. He had encouraged me to eat fish slice (not those fried fish slices) noodle with soup everyday! I guess this is something unrealistic and definitely not sustainable. He added that this was he had been eating over the years. My conclusion: good trainer to help you with the weights aspect but not a good choice overall as the training must be a balanced one. Diet is also an important aspect which should not be neglected.

Type 3: Knowledgeable and committed. My trainer no. 1 was the best trainer among the 3 and I think he was really good in terms of his knowledge in areas of basic nutrition, strength training and cardio exercise. Moreover, he constantly provides encouragement and tracked progress regularly. He was the only one to explain the food energy for the major food groups and provide the rationale behind advocating brown rice/bread over white bread. (if you are keen to know more, feel free to visit my blog for an article devoted to eating whole grains and its benefits). How I should adjust my eating habits and what type of food to avoid during the weight loss period whereby I should be having an extremely strict diet was part of his plan for me. He was again the only trainer to enlighten me on what is heart rate and how and why I should monitor my heart rate when I do my cardio exercises for best results. One more thing about his training, yes, you got it! Once again, he was the only one who taught me to do stretches after each weight training reps and the importance of stretching and proper breathing techniques when lifting the weights. Occasionally, he would up the training ante and use gym balls, and BOSU is enlightening me on the mechanics behind using this equipment and why using them would help with weight loss. My conclusion: He was the best trainer I had, and I had achieved my weight loss goals in the fastest time.

I had achieved high and significant results with trainer no.1 where I was 10kg lighter after I had finished my training. I was doing well and maintained the results for the next 2 years. However, complacency set in and I lost the momentum which led me to trainer no. 2. I did not achieve any weight loss but instead maintained my weight. I guess not bad compared to putting on more weight. As for trainer no. 3, I did lose weight but as that was only for ten sessions training and I am more inclined to attribute the weight loss to the efficacy of the suspension training system rather than on the trainer itself.

One last reminder, it is important that your coaches can communicate well with you. The trainer must also offer the flexibility to accommodate re-scheduling request although not encouraged. It was a pretty bad experience with coach no. 3 when I cannot have the same recurring session slots and had to be on stand- by should his other clients gave up the slot. Be sure that the training times can be committed to you so that you can ensure regular training as opposed to either one session per week only or 2 sessions per week and you cannot even confirm those sessions let alone plan your other activities around your training! This is not a good sign and I would strongly encourage you to drop trainers who cannot commit a regular session with you.

Finally, personal trainers should ideally be trained and certified in first aid so that they can render help at any point in time during the training should the situation dictates so. I hope I have provided something valuable as a reference to selecting your personal trainer. If you would like to share with me or have other opinions, feel free to visit my blog and leave your comments.