#wordy as usual folks

[evakuality]

Matteo - episode ten

This episode!  Honestly it gives me warm fuzzy feelings throughout and I think that’s why even though I have a couple of issues with some of the previous episodes that I just genuinely do love this season so much.  This episode does such a lovely job of bringing everything together and wrapping everything up - though I am left as always wanting more.  So it’s a good thing that we got the Abi special so soon after :D 

Clip one - first I have to say how frustrating the way this is shot is.  There are so many lovely parts that would have made great screenshots if they hadn’t been so blurry.  The one I did is still blurry but I insisted on at least one per clip soooooo there had to be one.  

Anyway.  This clip!!!  I just have a lot of feelings about this clip.  After all the angst and the stress and the misunderstandings and the tension it’s just so incredibly wonderful to see them finally able to connect with no secrets or anything between them.  And the fact that Druck chose to move this moment to this episode is testament, I think, to how well they understood these characters.  Not only would it not have been in character for David to do this earlier, it also wouldn’t have been right for Matteo.  He’s been shown to be disengaged and isolated even from his own life for the whole season (more tbh when we look at him in previous seasons too) and he was just never really ready before now.  And btw, I think that’s why Sara’s ‘you wouldn’t have sex with me so you’re obviously gay’ thing bothers me so much.  People can be not ready for sex and not wanting to be pressured into it doesn’t make you gay!  But anyway, I like this moment and I like that they are so hesitant and gentle with each other.  It takes so long to build up to it from the fairly frantic parts before they get to the bedroom to the recognition, I think, that this is a big deal and that they can and should go slow once they get inside.  It just all feels so perfectly right for these characters.  And then the admission that they’re nervous (and excited apparently) and yet they’re still in the moment together and willing to work through it together.  In a lot of media at this point they would stop (which is a valid choice, don’t get me wrong) and I love that this scene acknowledges that you can be worried and nervous and it’s okay.  If you stay in the moment together then being nervous is okay and it can be part of the experience for you and you can figure out what you want together.  It’s just a really lovely moment and I love that they got to experience this in this way at this point.  The fact that there’s nothing hidden between them really makes it something special imo.  Not to say that other versions where it all happens at a different time and in a different way are wrong at all, but I just go back to how this is the right time and the right way for both of these characters and I love that.

Clip two - I could probably have written an entire essay on just this clip, I love it so much.  I love that it’s so long and this conversation is allowed so much time to breathe.  And that then we get such a lovely moment with Laura as well.  But let’s look at specifics, shall we?  It means so much that Matteo says that ‘everything’ is good after they’ve had a light, silly, teasing moment.  We see this side of him a lot particularly as s4 progresses but it’s not a side we’ve been allowed to see much in his own season.  But this is who he is or wants to be.  When he’s truly happy he’s being a brat to those he loves, and it’s so wonderful that after all the stress and the worry and the anxiety and the fear and anger etc that he’s been dealing with over the last few weeks, that he can now be his authentic self and be hugged and kissed and loved by someone as he is.  In some ways I think wanting to be accepted for their own authentic self is at the core of both of these boys and so it’s beautiful to see them both getting exactly that in this conversation.  Which of course brings us to the way they discuss David’s transition and his experiences and wishes.  I honestly don’t have the words to explain how much I feel for this section of this clip.  I love that David is comfortable, that he gets to talk about this with someone who does love him as he is.  I love that Matteo has clearly been researching but no big deal is made of it.  I love that we’re allowed to still see the traces of David’s fears and anxieties around this.  I love that he's allowed to be shown feeling something like yearning as he examines Matteo’s body.  I love that he relaxes when he’s told he’s good the way he is.  I love that his experience feels real and authentic.  So most of all I love that he’s played by someone who knows and understands how this would feel for a character like this and is able to be so authentic in his acting.  I am, as always, astonished by how well they managed to cast so many of these roles.  There are things I think could have been done better with the trans storyline, but all in all I’m glad that we got to have the scenes we did between these two when they get to discuss it together.  I just love this whole scene and the acting and the meaning.  And then as if we haven’t already been made all squishy and cosy already, then we get Laura added.  Wonderful Laura who treats Matteo like he’s meant to be there, who has already made breakfast for him and who is loving but firm with her brother.  To be honest, what this part taught me is that we were robbed of more Laura stuff because she’s such a beautiful character and it would have wonderful to see more of her both with David and with the other characters.  And then, as if that wasn’t enough, we get boyfriends sharing clothes casually like it’s no big deal and they’ve been doing it forever.  And the casual leaning on each other.  Just... this whole clip would honestly have made the entire episode by itself but it’s surrounded by other wonderful clips as well.

Clip three - The boys!!  I love this group of kids together.  They just work as a unit and I love that.  I mean, I also love how easily the boy and girl squads blend together in this show but there is something beautiful about each of them as separate entities.  And this scene shows the boys in all their best chaotic glory.  First, I really do love how Matteo is allowed to stall be withdrawn and low energy in this scene.  He’s active and engaged in the conversation, takes pains to talk with the others etc so he’s not disengaged like he has been before.  But he’s also not the Matteo we often see, the one who’s energetic and being a little shit.  Even when David arrives he stays low, slumping all over his boyfriend etc.  I love that it shows your personality doesn’t have to change, you don’t have to stop being introverted etc just because your life is ‘happy’ - he’s still himself, but here he’s a happier version of himself.  And then David.  It’s lovely how the boys just welcome him in.  This is either their first meeting with him as Matteo’s official boyfriend or another very early one (and tbh his body tension etc suggests it is probably the first).  And yet the boys treat him as one of the group, bringing him into the conversation and being their usual stupid selves.  There’s a beautiful peace to the scene even as they range over a number of subjects and characters even feel sad or anxious at times.  It’s still got this really lovely welcoming vibe.  I’d like to say, almost as an aside, that Jonas’s song really is a bit melancholy and yet that’s kind of a good thing?  or at least appropriate.  I talked in the episode 9 part about how bittersweet finishing school can be and this song really fits that feeling.  So it’s ironic that Carlos is the one who most pushes back against it when he was the one who most felt the bittersweet way about the end of exams etc.  But maybe that’s why - he wants the anthem because he’s feeling the most vulnerable.  Also, I know everyone likes to laugh at Matteo and David being all ‘just communicate!!’ but a) they did!  That’s how they got together! and b) right now, they are some of the few people this group knows who have a relationship so perhaps maybe they have the rights of it!

Clip four - I love a supportive boyfriend <33333 The way Matteo tries to calm David by being an idiot on their way to the office and then the way he insists he wants to be there when David says he didn’t have to.  It’s all just so lovely.  For a relatively short moment this whole bit tell us so much about Matteo and how he shows his affection.  I know we’ve seen it before but I do love seeing it in action in such an obvious and determined way.  And the fact that he is supported in turn by the whole group is so precious.  By this point in the week it was starting to become very very bittersweet (there’s that feeling again) as a member of the audience as the season is coming to an end.  So it’s really nice to see everyone there at this time.  And of course, the story itself is coming to a close as well.  We wrap up David’s story (well basically) as we find out that he’s allowed to be graded correctly.  And Amira’s solidarity is precious to me - as another who would face discrimination I love that it’s she who refuses to move for the teacher.  I really do love her.  She’s got some similarities with Sana and yet she has a steel and a way of engaging with the world that is entirely her own.  I love that she got her own season but I’m sad at how parts of it were stolen from her.  I also love that Matteo is perfectly happy to kiss David in public.  I’ve always thought he’s been a more open Isak and more willing to accept and acknowledge his sexuality.  I don’t think that’s necessarily been the biggest issue in his path and I don’t know, this feels like it proves it in a way.  That’s a whole room full of people, including adults, who don’t necessarily know about this relationship and he just goes for it, no hesitation.  

Clip five and six - yeah so I see these as both parts of the same clip and so I’m discussing them together.  This is such a joyous part of the season.  It’s so nice to see them celebrating together and being so happy.  I will admit that in real time it was very overwhelming with all the social media etc but that was also really nice because it felt like such a loss to move away from these characters.  Thank goodness for the Abi special and Amira’s season and all the social media stuff in between.  That was such a fabulous time in the fandom.  But I digress.  As sad as it always makes me, this is such a lovely ending to the season.  That Matteo is able to be so free and open and happy among his friends and that he’s even able to say at the end that he doesn’t know what he wants to do but it’s ok because he’s happy right where he is.  I’m still bothered that we never got any closure on this, we never got to see him move past this.  Which is realistic I’m sure and yet I still want to know.  Other things I’ve thought/wondered about these clips: why is Hans there? Jonas/Anselm’s song is lovely and I always wanted to get a copy but never did.  I’d forgotten the weed stuff so having it come back like this was hilarious.  Red is my favourite colour so this whole part really vibes with me.  I really love the addition of ‘with you’ to the ‘life is now’ because Matteo was so alienated and isolated for so long that it’s nice to see him thinking that ‘with you’ is an integral part of his current contentment.

And that’s that.  I’m all emotional all over again now that I’ve done this so it’s probably good that I’m starting an anniversary rewatch again so soon!  And sometime soon I also want to revisit Amira’s season.  I’ve only watched it properly once so I’m pretty excited to see it again.  I really really miss my og Druck kids.

[genericpuff]

Hi! I came here from your "lore olympus biggest whiff" blog about the finale... I've never read LO but I was always interested in it. However, after reading a few paragraphs of that blog (I didn't read all of it because I didn't want to get too many spoilers), it doesn't seem worth it. Would you recommend it up to a certain chapter? If yes, until which chapter should I read?

Honestly, if you want to read LO, I absolutely highly recommend reading the whole thing, or at least trying to. Not just to give context to the things we're all talking about in these communities, but also because it's about to go behind the Daily Pass wall on August 29th and it'll become even more inconvenient to do so.

I'm personally still a huge sucker for the first season myself because it just has that magic that LO used to have that a lot of us fell in love with in the first place; it still has its flaws, it's definitely the worst of the "Persephone looks like a toddler" era, but the characters feel a lot more real and a lot of the best, most iconic panels from the series come from S1. The first half of S2 also isn't awful, though the art does start to get a bit rough around the edges. It wasn't until the last half of S2 that I personally started to go , "Wait, I don't think Rachel knows what she's doing." That said, I didn't become a full-blown critic of the series until the S2 finale, which is where I firmly believe the comic should have ended (that is, if Rachel had structured the story better to allow for the S2 finale to be the overall series finale).

But you should read as much of it as you can anyways. Even if you can't get through a certain part of the story and decide to DNF, that's fine, but I personally don't want to be the one deciding for folks what they should be reading or how much. I also definitely don't want people forming their opinion of a work like LO entirely through my criticisms of it - the best way for you to form your own opinion, regardless of whether or not it aligns with my own, is to simply read it yourself. I know where I started to lose interest in the series, but you might not feel the same way when you read it yourself. It's definitely happened in the past that people have gone to read LO to "see what all the fuss is about" only to wind up loving it haha and that's great, honestly, I don't want anyone to wind up missing out on something they might like just because of my own opinions about it :' )

Honestly it seems daunting but you can easily read all of LO between today and the 29th, a lot of the earlier S1 episodes are relatively short and the actual pacing of the comic itself throughout the second and third season makes for a very quick reading experience, text bubbles usually aren't too wordy so depending on how fast of a reader you are, you can usually blitz through each episode within 2-3 minutes (that said, I'm also a bit of a faster reader so your reading time may vary). Plus the episode count on the app is also thrown off by several episodes that are purely dedicated to Q&A's, hiatus notices, etc. So it's about a 12-18 hour reading experience give or take, which sounds like a lot, but if you're able to read several chunks of episodes at a time in bursts, it can be done by the time it goes behind DP on the 29th :' )

So yeah ! I do hope you read it for yourself if you're really curious, and if you do, feel free to come back again and tell me about your experience! Did you get through all of it or did you DNF? Did it put any of my own criticisms into better context for you or did you wind up enjoying the series regardless?

Best of luck!! <3

[kentocalls]

jiraiya | breadcrumbs nsfw. it’s a situationship but the good kind, i wanted to thank @actuallysaiyan for writing all those prompts. also the gif 🥵

he groans, crosses out the line that’s lived for only three seconds, the words dancing around his eyes, mocking him. he’s the renown author of the Icha Icha series. he can write, move his audience with his captivating comedy and well timed eruptions of emotions. but this, this piece of work is draining everything from him.

his cup is empty, his snacks gone. tense and frustrated he snaps his pen across the room. he could find something, someone to help take his mind off of it all. except he’s causes enough of a racket, his mission isn’t an easy one and he’s not exactly kept low key about his presence. it’s going to mean more paperwork and an earful from superiors and writing was supposed to help. the editor would be less person to yell at him. alas. the night is not in his favor.

the village is silent, most folks already asleep. he can hear cats fighting if he really tried but even then, his stares at the blank wall ahead. a flash of the prettiest lips fills his mind and he aches.

his mind trails after the confident, youthful, smart shinobi who had his knees gracing the ground with a simple ask. he doesn't know how it started, doesn't care where it goes, wants more. maybe there's enough clues if he looks for them, maybe his favorite has graced him with kindness and left a morsel.

enough is enough, he’s leaving tomorrow. the change of pace necessary, he has to keep moving. because who he’s seeking isn’t here and the mission is at a dead end too. t

he wind offers another pause from his thoughts, tempation, cool against his skin gentle, inviting. he closes his eyes, takes half a second to let his body relax, half a second to imagine it’s not the wind’s gentle caress but wait! he didn’t open the window, he wouldn’t this late and—

there’s your scent and something medicinal permeating the room.

you’ve always been fast. confidnet. slipping into unsavory places with ease.

making the most excellent shinobi and his worst habit.

by the time he’s done looking at the window your seated on his desk, writing pad in arms as your eyes trace over the latest pagse written. you’ve always loved spoilers, itching to know what happens before everyone else.

it makes him feel smug, after all these are fresh words, something exclusive only he can offer. gods, he’s missed your face, notes swollen lips and tired eyes, ignores the scratches near your chin. what you both do is dangerous, tedious, necessary. he won't ask because you can't tell. still the thought, did you rush over immedidately after a succes?

eyes rake your beautiful form spilling over his work desk.

your uniform has seen better days but he’s so so so pleased to see exposed skin. your legs look so smooth, nevermind new scratches and old scares greeting him.

he’s staring, gawking like an inexperienced brat, it would be embarrassing, you’d tease him endlessly for it, however, you’re so engrossed in his writing. swaying your legs softly, they dangle freely off the desk, and yet managing to cage him in. his palms reach up, kisses at a small cut on your knee, large palms soothing, fondling, massaging your thighs. itching to admire.

you’re here.

skin is hot, face is a bit flushed though you’re hiding it behind a stoic expression, eyes stealing more and more words. it’s not that long of a chapter, he sighs and pulls you closer, face nuzzling into your stomach, you can feel his kisses through your uniform. needy.

he’s usually wordy, jokey, loud. leaves no space for the outside world when it’s just you two, but right now he’s being such a good boy. you wonder how long it’ll last, the fact he’s being gentle and slow with his movements is trippy. especially when you know how tough he is, have seen him snap men in half so casually. flaunts his reputation, his height, his fame like he’s breathing but right now? letting you read unreleased, unedited writing?

letting you sit on his precious desk, your scent will drive him mad when you’re gone in the morning. he doesn’t have to be nice, could’ve easily stopped you from slipping into his room. taken you against the wall, you wouldn’t have protested. except he didn’t, he’s being the most gracious host.

that’s the only reason one of your hands plays with his long locks, eyes pulling away from his writing pad when your fingers, inevitably, tangle. “hair’s gotten too long.”

“to match yours.” he muffles, before leaning back and looking up almost innocent. like his hands aren’t squeezing and molding and clawing at your thighs. like his mouth isn’t kissing lower and lower, as if he isn’t inhaling that sweet scent that’s evaded him for months now.

you hum, spreading your legs wider, tilting your hips a little higher, his hands know what to do, moving to the waistband of your bottoms, “why’s this one so serious?”

“if you read the other two you’d see why.” he grins, a lazy hand drawing circles from your bellybutton down to your clothed sex and your hand snaps to his wrist with such power. “i like my uniform, i need it clean.” your glare sends shivers down his spine, you’d be mean for him if he asked right?

“and where are the other two?” he doesn’t want you to move, he doesn’t want to spend time playing writer and editor. he much rather gather more field experience, engaging in physical activities has always been his forte, he’s a hands on learner afterall.

crumbles the second your hand is patting at his cheek, pulling his hair and crashing your lips to his. it’s greedy, messy, hungry. you’ve been pent up too. the missions come one after the other and you’re such a high rank, all those secrets and no where to bury them — who knows the weight of all the pain you cary better than one of the legendary sannin?

it’s why you seek him out, over and over again

he doesn’t ask for more, doesn’t push and always pulls you close.

“i wanna…” he nips at your lips, stop distracting him, moves his hands under your top and up, squeezing, groping, pulling, “need too, ah, read the other two first.”

“you’ve worked hard enough,” finally your legs wrap around his hips, he lifts you up so easily, grips the back of your neck firmly, earning a moan, oh you need him, “let me take care of you.”

laying under him, he’s extra careful peeling your clothing off, aware your previous warning still hangs true. you’d take a kunai to his arm if he dirties another uniform. in another setting, he'd like that very much. but he's barely containing his urges, forces hands to work with extra patience, despite his pressing need making itself known. makes a haste of kissing, licking, biting, bruising what can be hidden. for both your eyes only.

you’re so pretty for him.

he tries to pace himself, tries not to get caught up in spite of all his reasoning to go slow he’s a frantic mess. hands clasping with yours, using one arm to hold both your arms above your head, you comply so easily, mouth open and wanton and how the fuck is he going to do all the things he wants to do if he can’t stop kissing you?

a hand snacks down your chest, pinching, fingernails lightly scratching before reaching your core and the gasp you make; drives him insane, let him be a little mean, a little rough, the sounds he makes deepening your need further. his own hips canting against your thigh and sheets.

part of him still doesn’t believe you’re here. that you're not an illusion. that he doesn’t need to wreck his brain and imagine the sounds slipping freely from your lips, that he can take you in with all his senses. have you falling apart in all the ways he knows you adore.

“pretty pretty thing…” he’s sucking and biting on your neck, sliding another finger in and the sloshing sounds cause your cheeks to burn. you want more, hips bucking up on their own, you want so much more but he’s breaking a rule.

“no ma-marks, jiraiya, don’t—“ silencing you with a heated kis, hand frees your arms, one to squeeze at your neck; it’s just enough pressure, how you like it; brain almost turning almost mush. but he’s pulls back, grins wide with a third finger in you now. you’re so wet, sounds absolutely filthy.

“let’s ruin ourselves for anyone else, yeah?” and fuck, he can’t say shit like that when you’re like this, body clenching around him. call it lust, call it longing, call it satisfaction whatever he has you chasing is where you want to go. the softest kiss on lips and he starts to trail down, praises and naughty things whipsered into your skin.

editing his draft can wait.

that’s not why you snuck in anyways.

[quinloki]

Hi Quin <3

I may or may not have gone through your entire catalog haha (^///^) Thank you for feeding us all so well ☆ Such stunning works!!!!! (シ_ _ )シ

I was wondering, I find that I keep on reading the same people a lot. Have you discovered some cool new people to read from recently? any great recs? stuff you keep coming back to?

Anyways, you're awesome!! And I can't wait to read what you come up with next!!!!!

=O Sideblogs and everything?

...

Σ(っ °Д °;)っ

(*/ω＼*)

Goodness. ❤️I'm glad you enjoyed my stuff enough to read all that. I'm a terribly wordy ^^;

Ah! But hmmm... I do tend to read from many of the same folks, especially since I ended up surrounded by impressive writers.

But let's do this:

@swampstew - if you follow me, you know her. I cannot fathom otherwise, and if you don't, start here.

this is @icy-spicy's master list - I'd have that cold shower ready before you start, but there's more than One Piece there.

@mydisenchantedeulogy writes for a lot of fandoms, her words are so good I'm a fan of her stories without even having seen the universes they come from.

@un-shit-yourself is a long time real life friend, and a fantastic writer. Mostly Dragon Age, but the writing pulls you in. We chat, but we don't usually cross post, so you probably don't know about this one even if you do follow me.

@zoros-sheath - if you haven't read Magnets, start there, otherwise go hog wild. I can't imagine you're going to find anything bad.

@standfucker - whew, I look - Zen makes me wonder why I even write because what she writes is just too goddamn hot. Y'all don't need me, you got her. (I say this in jest, I'm going nowhere I promise) White Out and Rotation are two of my favorites, but Stowing Away to Save Yourself is something I specifically requested and gods was I served well.

@writing-yarn-goblin and @lyndsyh24 and @theaceofflamesposts are here, but you're more likely to enjoy the first two on Wattpad and the last on Ao3. Lyn's getting more active here, but her library is full of good stuff - fluffier than my usual work, but just as good imo. Lyn is one of the biggest reasons y'all get to deal with me at all. She was a saint when I stumbled into Wattpad.

I love @heyitsdoe and @/bas-writes stuff - they are both phenomenal writers. Bas has shifted away from OP a little and is more into JJK, but if you're looking for solid fic to read, then you will find tons there and I promise you'll enjoy it =3 Doe is super sweet and her writing is always a full meal, I've commissioned her and it was far and away worth every penny.

Honestly, I'd really recommend checking out my Following page. I leave it public, but everyone on it is either a friend, a writer, an artist, or some combination of all three.

I could go on in this post for like 5,000 more words and not hit everyone who has delighted me. @cyborg-franky @coza-main @lerya-fanfic @leakyweep @leftsidebonfire -- I'm going to hit a damn tag limit again.

@thus-spoke-lo is a little on the darker side, but gods alive I love her work, and I could read it for hours if I had the hours to spare.

@vizkopa writes in a way that helped me loosen up and write more how I wanted to, so thank her for that, and enjoy what she's got - mostly on Wattpad I believe? I know that's where I've read it.

Seriously, just peruse my followers, if you need something new.

But know that like me, they're 18+ and that's a boundary for their comfort as much as anything else. So don't break that.

[mewos-laptop]

Hi uhm, I hope you don't mind me sending this, I'm randomly just anxious right now

Is. Is it true that overthinking your texts like. All the time and the only way to stop it is to be able to recheck your texts.. Not normal??

Because I was alerted yesterday that apparently be coming anxious that this may have aciddentally sent a friend a fucking hate crime instead of the usual "hi how are you" and needing to RECHECK YOUR MESSAGE to stop the thoughts isn't normal???

- Spinel (Pearl is trying to help me calm down)

No, that's not a normal thought pattern most folks have. /nbr

That's a very common obsession and compulsion loop folks w/ OCD have, myself included.

Obv it may not be OCD, and could just be OCD traits or anxiety, bc OCD itself is an anxiety disorder, but it may be something to keep in mind. /nf, gen, nbr

(I've realized all of this has come off very blunt, we do apologize for that, psychology is one of our interests, and we usually don't like to make anything overly complicated or wordy to read or comprehend when talking about this sort of thing).

-Sunday

[julianplum]

thought I'd upload a little process video of my latest piece! I've seen some tags from folks who were saying it looked digital even though they know it's not, so I wanted to show a little process so y'all could see how this painting came together!

also THANK YOU to everyone who reblogs work and leaves tags on it, it is free serotonin for artists to read what y'all think of our work and I love it so much!!!

I'll talk a lil more about my process under the cut, for anyone who's interested.

Step 1 is always research & what I call "get to know you" sketches. For this particular piece, I have a lot of nasturtiums in my garden, so I went and sat outside and sketched with neocolor crayons to get the shapes, colors, and vibes down.

Step 2 is to dive a little deeper into the details. I found references in my own plant & also online, and sketched out some more detailed flower and leaf shapes to understand how this plant works and what makes it feel like a nasturtium. I did my base color study at this point, too.

You can see some of these exact shapes repeated or elaborated on in the final piece! This was a really helpful part of the process.

Once I feel comfy with my subject material, I'll sketch out the final composition. This step REALLY helps me figure out how everything is going to flow and land on the final page. Composition and layout is that secret thing that takes your piece from a study to an illustration. I'm making conscious choices here about which way I want your eye to move in the piece, where my focal points are, where I'm leaving white space (or black space, in this case!) and where I'm putting leaves, flowers, and critters.

As you can see this isn't final, and I made some changes particularly to that middle-top section in the final because it wasn't flowing right on the page, but this is what I worked off of to get:

Some folks use lightboxes and trace their final sketch onto the page to get clean lines. I like to keep the looseness of a sketch by just drawing (and erasing!) onto my final paper. I used Arches Hot Press paper and a light green colored pencil here, and the great thing about nice watercolor paper is that you can erase into it and not hurt the grain. Obviously don't go too hard, but it's pretty forgiving!

Once I have my final sketch down, I'll usually block in my important shapes first, hence why I started with the leaves, then lay down textures and other colors, add final details, and then in this case I added the black background last, which was terrifying. I took a lot of pictures just before blocking in the background in case I messed it up!

Anyway I hope that's interesting to someone, it's probably way too wordy and granular but I love talking about this stuff and it's always really helpful for me to peek into folks' processes, so! If you've made it this far, keep an eye out for this piece to pop into my Etsy shop in a couple weeks 👀

[alpydk]

How do you do that? (Fanfic writing)

I've not seen many of these posts. I always see a "well the words come in my head and I just do." So I'm going to be me and write too much and tell you how my work process is for writing and how I write the stuff I do. Good? Good. - Warning - This is a long post.

Step 1! The idea!

The best stories are written in truth. So if you have something you've experienced, adapt it and get it down. 1, it's therapeutic. 2, you can channel your own emotions and experience into it. It's more real when there is something behind it. Take f.x The Moment - a lot of my personal experiences and trains of thought went into that and it gives the character in it a lot more life.

"she would sit alone in her tent, her legs pulled close to her chest, her eyes on her pack comparing the pros and cons of the act, before eventually she would move to the campfire where her allies would act as her unknown protectors." - I've done this with the pros and cons and eventually just sticking around people. Real experience = More relatable to the reader.

Other ideas come from common tropes you see in movies, tags I've seen on Ao3 which light something in me, scenes in movies that I've loved and just a vivid imagination that's very dramatic. Seriously folks, write down your daydreams.!

Step 2! Planning!

For poems, don't plan and do very little editing. Some will probably hate that. I'm expecting Jourdane to be biting the bars of her cage at that statement, but the best poems just flow from the heart (At least in my case.) For fics, I grab a pen and jot down an outline. You've seen my pokemon book and the many pages with random notes like "FEELINGS, Comfort smut." - This gives me my basis, the start middle and end, what characters will be involved and the dots I need to connect. I'll usually also include some inner perspectives I want to put in. f.x "Guilt/Fear/Control" - Sort of character themes. This reminds me of the character motives and reactions so they don't go off as I'm writing.

Now, this doesn't mean the plan will change as I write. It has done in the past, but that just means a new load of notes is written.

Step 3! The writing!

This is the part you all really want. I'm going to use some of As you Wish - To break it down.

Descriptions

When it comes to fanfic, especially in canon, we already have a set idea of the characters and locations in our mind. So I spend very little time on character and location descriptions unless they matter in the scene.

"Pale fingers spun the wedding ring mindlessly on the wooden table of the tavern as the now owner of the band spoke." -

Pale fingers, that's a signature of Astarion, could also talk about hair colour, red eyes, key features. For Gale, it's usually robes, dark eyes, beard. The wedding ring (most associate with gold or silver but it is not important, mind fills it in). The wooden table in the tavern, brain will hopefully put us in the Elfsong or similar - but again, not really important, as this is not what the scene or story is about. I stick to what is needed, or it just becomes more about details than the message. Dialogue

Start with the canon dialogue. Do not be ashamed to use it to give you an idea of how characters talk. You see in the game that Gale is very wordy. I am not. So what I do is take a standard line and then 'Gale it up' - What I mean is I go onto OneLook - Take a word and replace it with something more intellectual. Gale does not say "I'm sorry" very often. He says "My apologies" He doesn't say "we're talking about."; he says "We're discussing..." - You get the idea. Include character actions they commonly do. Astarion in mine spends a lot of time scoffing and smirking. Flamboyant hand actions and the like. Karlach speaks loudly, Gale gestures and gazes. Emotions A lot of thinking, a lot of wondering, a lot of feeling. So much character introspection put into non dialogue parts. Either in the form of some internal monologue. "Of sorts... Of course, he’s said it like that," or questions the character would ask themselves. "What would happen with it tomorrow as they took on their final battle with the Netherbrain?" Combine with genuine ways the characters would question these things, how a real person would act. So many fics I've read either become very 2 dimensional with their characters. They spend so long on direct dialogue or physical descriptions that they miss what makes a person a person, and it's this inner soul that speaks more than anything. It's the doubts and the worries and the love and the happiness we FEEL. It needs to be written in too. Take, for example, Gale - Man is filled with self doubt, crushed under the weight of his past with Mystra. He may act outwardly confident, but inside he's not. These things need to be included to get it right.

Poetic Language

The analysis part... I like to call a spade a spade. If I've used a metaphor or something, it is exactly how it's meant to be used. There is no speculation of meaning, no "but the author is possibly conveying a sense of loss through the description of the red carpet." - There's a place for that and I'm sure that's what makes other people's fics considerably better than mine, but I don't have the time or longing for that. My comparisons are very obvious, again so the reader can relate. "What was marriage if not chains to bind?" - See? Very obvious way of thinking that marriage is a prison, and it not only includes the emotions of the character's introspective thoughts but also some of that well-used billedsprog (picture language, can't think of the English word - am not schooled enough).

Anyway, metaphors and such - Don't gatekeep your work trying to be intellectual. Reading, especially fanfic, is there to be enjoyed by everyone, so as a writer just keep it simple.

Step 4! Editing!

I personally used ProWritingAid for spelling and grammar checking. Grammarly is also a good one but very pushy in its premium advertising.

I try to avoid using repeat words too often, again see OneLook for alternatives. I also read my fic through on word first checking for errors, then copy and paste to Tumblr where I read again. The font and layout is different, so I can spot more that I might have skimmed over the first time. If I want to be sure, then I might go out for a few hours and then read through again later and will surely find something. If you want to be really sure, find a beta reader (I personally don't because I can't handle the critique unless I know the other person is very skilled and trustworthy, even then it's my work, not theirs.) Congratulations, you have just written a fanfiction!

Share it on Tumblr, share it on Ao3 (or your chosen site), get depressed when it does not get the traction you want. This is the writer's way.

I hope this helps at least one person to join the fanfic writing community. Honestly, just write and be creative. Don't doubt yourself, don't think you're not good enough, just put words on paper and go for it. There is a reader out there for every writer. You just have to find each other.

[active-mind-15]

I've had a thought for some time now... what if Akashi was a BTS fan?

At first, I was entertaining this idea simply because BTS and KNB are my biggest interests, but then I started to think harder about it, and I think it would make sense for him to be a fan of them.

Now, I know some of my KNB moots on Tumblr listen to Kpop, but I know that not everyone does, and even the ones who do are not all fans of BTS. With that being said, I'll try and explain things as best as I can for all the folks unfamiliar with BTS so this headcanon is easier to understand even for non-fans.

I predict this is going to be a very long post, so I'll have mercy on y'all and put the rest of this under the cut. Enjoy!

A summary of who BTS is for anyone reading who doesn't know them:

7-member music group from South Korea. They debuted on June 13th, 2013, and are comprised of 3 rappers and 4 vocalists. The members are RM (leader and rapper), Jin (vocalist), Suga (rapper), J-Hope (rapper), Jimin (vocalist), V (vocalist), and Jungkook (vocalist). Here's a picture for reference. I also wrote their stage names down next to each member so you know who is who.

BTS is an acronym for Bangtan Sonyeondan, roughly translating to "bulletproof boys". So, BTS aimed to be the bulletproof shield to protect people--especially those in their 10s and 20s--from harsh societal criticism that rained down on them like bullets. Their fanbase is called ARMY, an acronym that stands for "Adorable Representative MCs for Youth" (yeah I know it's wordy), and with that name, BTS hoped that listeners of their music would be inspired to find their voice and spread positivity. While they do have their fair share of cute/silly songs, a very large chunk of their work is lyrically introspective and touches on a lot of social, psychological, and even political issues. Bolstered by the fact that their music is self-written and co-produced, their authenticity is one of their biggest strong points and has allowed millions of people worldwide to relate to the messages in their music.

That being said, what does this have to do with Akashi being an ARMY? Well, I just wanted to imagine how he would become fascinated with a group like them, so I'll be splitting up this post into sections. I don't know how many sections I'll do, I'm winging this as I go, so let's just start with section 1.

HOW DID HE BECOME AN ARMY?

Mibuchi. Mibuchi strikes me as someone who would already be an ARMY and would convince Akashi to give them a shot. Maybe Akashi catches Mibuchi gushing over some photos of them online and it happens enough times that he finally cracks and asks who they are.

As someone who is an ARMY of 7+ years, when someone asks me who BTS is, I have to hold myself back from exploding where I stand because I get so excited when someone wants to know about them because they're so amazing that I always want more people to discover their music. Mibuchi, being the dedicated ARMY that he is, would instantly fill Akashi in on the details of who they are, the type of music they make, and who each of the members is, and Akashi would listen very intently, getting more curious the more he listens to Mibuchi talk about them.

Something I usually do when people ask for BTS recs is ask them for their favorite genres. The reason why I do that is because BTS has experimented with so many genres that their discography is incredibly diverse, probably more diverse than most artists I've ever listened to. So, I usually just fine-tune my recommendations to people's preferences to make the initial listening experience more palatable. And that's what Mibuchi does for Akashi. Once he gets Akashi's favorite genres, he sends him a playlist of BTS songs that fit his preferences. And so, because Akashi isn't one to turn down music recommendations, he keeps his word and listens to the playlist front to back.

After finishing the playlist, Akashi lays on his bed and stares at the ceiling, the chemistry of his brain permanently altered, wondering how on earth he went so long without knowing who BTS was.

AKASHI'S BIAS AND BIAS-WRECKER

If you don't know what these terms mean, having a 'bias' just means you have a favorite member. It's someone you feel your attention is naturally drawn to more than others in the group. You can be drawn to them for multiple reasons such as liking their voice, thinking their fashion is cool, or having a similar personality to theirs. There really are no rules for this kind of thing. A 'bias-wrecker' is a member who steals (said endearingly) your attention away from your bias, on occasion. Think of it as two members constantly replacing each other as your favorite. However, this is not always the case and not every ARMY has a bias/bias-wrecker. Some spread their attention pretty evenly across all the members and don't really have a particular favorite. But it's a fun question ARMYs like to ask other ARMYs every now and again, so for the sake of this post, I will include who I think Akashi's bias and bias-wrecker would be if he had them.

So, right off the bat, I know deep in my heart that Akashi's bias would without a doubt be Suga.

Reasons why I think Suga would be his bias:

All of the BTS members are authentic, but Suga is most notably known for his raw unfiltered lyrics and his candidness about his past experiences. He suffered a lot in his teens and 20s to be able to make music the way he is today. Despite all that, he's unafraid to speak about his mental health journey and often encourages ARMYs to be open about our own journies as well so we can normalize conversations around it and get the support we need. Through listening to Suga's story, Akashi would probably relate a lot to his struggles and gain strength from his words.

Suga's stage name is actually short for "shooting guard" because that was the basketball position he used to play back when he was in high school. So, he would get extra points in Akashi's book simply for that. I know he'd be excited to find out that piece of information and relay it back to Mibuchi, who would then show Akashi videos of Suga playing basketball and get him more excited about Suga. I can just imagine him going into captain mode and making little comments here and there like "he has a nice release" or "his shots go in very cleanly" or "I would have scouted him for Rakuzan if he were a high-schooler".

I also think there are a few similarities in their personalities Akashi would pick up on. Aside from their shared love of basketball and personal struggles with mental health as teens, I would say they're both pretty introverted, are extremely hard workers, both play piano, both show affection to their loved ones through acts of service, and both of them are incredibly strong, despite all that they've been through.

But who is Akashi's bias-wrecker? I'd have to say it'd be RM.

Reasons why I think RM would be his bias:

As I've mentioned before, RM is the official leader of BTS. I think for that reason, he would garner a lot of respect from Akashi, who would be impressed as to how he could be the leader of a globally recognized group starting from such a young age, especially when he hears about all of the hardships BTS had to face as they climbed up the ladder. As someone who has also had to step up and be a leader from a very young age, Akashi would look to RM and take notes of his leadership style to see if there's anything he could implement in his own life.

RM is also one of the main lyricists of BTS and the way he can speak and carry himself with such poise and maturity would also be another thing that Akashi respects. He loves to analyze RM's lyrics for every use of double entendres, wordplay, and literary/psychology references. (I have a separate headcanon that Akashi is at least conversational in Korean, if not fluent, so I'm sure that would make RM's lyrics all the more interesting to dissect.)

Akashi would also find similarities between himself and RM, too, outside of being leaders of their respective teams such as a love for the fine arts and nature, high intelligence (RM has an IQ of 148), and his down-to-earth demeanor.

FAVORITE BTS GROUP SONGS:

So I'm just gonna go album by album and list the songs that I think Akashi would pick as his favorite from each one, mostly due to the message in the lyrics, but some will also be because I think the instrumentals would be up his alley. I'll also provide some links to lyric videos so you guys can listen and read along to further understand my song choices. Any songs with an asterisk(*) next to them will link to a music video, so just turn on the closed captions. Fair warning, the older music videos have translated captions that are a little bit clunkier, but they're still readable. Anyway, let's go!

2 Cool 4 Skool (2013):

No More Dream*

O!RUL8,2? (2013):

Intro: O!RUL8,2?

N.O*

Skool Luv Affair (2014):

Just One Day*

Dark & Wild (2014):

Rain

The Most Beautiful Moment in Life, Part 1 (2015):

Intro: The Most Beautiful Moment in Life

Moving On

The Most Beautiful Moment in Life, Part 2 (2015):

RUN*

Butterfly

The Most Beautiful Moment in Life: Young Forever (2016):

Butterfly (Prologue Mix)

House of Cards (Full Length Edition)

Epilogue: Young Forever*

Wings (2016):

Lie

First Love

Reflection

2! 3!

You Never Walk Alone (2017):

Spring Day*

A Supplementary Story: You Never Walk Alone

Love Yourself: Her (2017):

Serendipity*

Outro: Her

Sea

Love Yourself: Tear (2018):

Singularity*

The Truth Untold

Paradise

Magic Shop

Love Yourself: Answer (2018):

Euphoria

Answer: Love Myself

Map of the Soul: Persona (2019):

Mikrokosmos

Jamais Vu

Map of the Soul: 7 (2020)

Black Swan* (also the classical version*)

Louder Than Bombs

We are Bulletproof: The Eternal*

BE (2020)

Life Goes On*

Blue & Grey

Proof (2022)

Yet To Come*

For Youth

BTS has released some Japanese original songs, too, so I'll include which ones I think would be his favorite among those!

Crystal Snow (2017)

Lights* (2019)

Your Eyes Tell (2020)

FAVORITE BTS SOLO SONGS:

Each of the BTS members has dropped their own solo projects whether it be singles or full albums, so I'll go member by member and talk about which of each member's solo songs I think would be his favorite.

RM:

Life (RM, 2015)

uhgood (mono, 2018)

forever rain* (mono, 2018)

No. 2 (Indigo, 2022)

Jin:

Tonight (2019)

Abyss (2020)

Yours (2021)

Suga/Agust D:

So Far Away (Agust D, 2016)

People (D-2, 2020)

Set me free (D-2, 2020)

AMYGDALA* (D-DAY, 2023)

Snooze (D-DAY, 2023)

J-Hope:

Piece of Peace (Hope World, 2018)

Blue Side (Hope World, 2018)

Equal Sign (Jack in the Box, 2022)

Safety Zone (Jack in the Box, 2022)

Jimin:

Promise (2018)

Like Crazy* (FACE, 2023)

Alone (FACE, 2023)

V:

Scenery (2019)

Snow Flower (2020)

Rainy Days* (Layover, 2023)

Love Me Again* (Layover, 2023)

Jungkook:

Still With You (2020)

Stay Alive (2022)

Shot Glass of Tears (Golden, 2023)

HOW AKASHI FEELS BEING AN ARMY

I think finding out such a prominent music act is singing about topics he directly relates to is such a shock to him. It's like he feels seen at long last and he isn't going through these issues alone. Even if BTS doesn't know who he is, the fact that their music speaks to him is enough to comfort him through tough times.

I'd like to think that when he's had an exceptionally rough day, he likes to just lie in bed and listen to them. He seems like the type of person to reserve time out of his day to just listen to their music in silence.

Because he became such a fan, he and Mibuchi would now have so much more to talk about with each other, and Akashi would also come to understand why Mibuchi would be such a big fan of a group like them. Together, they'd stream new releases right when they come out, watch BTS's livestreams together, and, if they're able, go to concerts together. Concerts are more of a new thing for Akashi since I feel like he has never been to a proper concert before, so the first concert he'd ever go to would probably be super overwhelming, but he'd feel reassured with Mibuchi by his side. And the concert ends up being amazing and Akashi feels like he just...belongs. Something would finally click for him that day, and he would realize that this level of connection, not just with the artists, but with the fans as well, was something he really enjoyed.

BTS would kinda stay as mainly Akashi and Mibuchi's thing, but Hayama and Nebuya do give BTS a shot, too, and find they do like a lot of their music as well. Their favorite songs are probably the more upbeat ones, though, as opposed to most of the ones I chose to be Akashi's favorites.

But the bottom line is that being able to come together with his friends over a common interest outside of basketball makes Akashi happy and he hopes he can continue to share memories with his friends through music.

Okay, I've gotta cut it off here, I have to get ready for a family dinner outing. If you managed to make it to the end of my post, I hope you enjoyed my ramblings and also the music I linked. Bye for now!

[sexhaver]

one of my favorite parts about MTG is how much wording matters, like you're making a deal with the fae folk. for example, look at this old-ass card:

the official Oracle text of this card reads as follows:

"Counter target instant spell if it's blue. Draw a card at the beginning of the next turn's upkeep."

those of you not well-versed in the intricacies of MTG rules jargon (i.e. normal people) might think of this as unnecessarily wordy. after all, wouldn't the following wording be shorter while keeping the same functionality?

"Counter target blue instant spell and draw a card at the beginning of the next turn's upkeep."

Wrong. You idiot. You absolute fucking oaf. You have just made the card objectively worse.

the first half has to stay the same because the actual wording allows you to target any instant spell (even nonblue ones), whereas the revised wording requires the spell to be blue as you cast Burnout. this means two things, one of which is pretty much irrelevant:

the wordings interact differently with spells/effects that change the color of a spell on the stack. with the actual wording, you could target a nonblue spell, then hold priority and respond to yourself by making the spell blue. with the revised wording, you would need to cast and resolve the effect turning the spell-to-be-countered blue before casting Burnout. this is completely and totally irrelevant because there are maybe 15 cards ever printed that change the color of a spell being cast, and the only one of them that doesn't suck ass is only usable as half of a two-card instant-win combo (Painter's Servant + Grinding Wheel)

you can cast the current wording targeting a spell that is not blue, it just won't be countered when Burnout resolves. the revised wording would make Burnout literally unplayable until your opponent casts a blue spell, which theyre not even guaranteed to have in their deck in the first place. i know this is kind of a subset of the last point but it bears repeating independent of the color-changing shit: the current wording lets you cast Burnout in response to ANY instant, not just blue ones

the second half has to remain as its own separate sentence because if it didn't, you wouldn't draw a card if the first half of the spell doesn't do anything (i.e. you targeted a nonblue instant). this one is kind of annoying to explain with counterspells so i'll use creature/damage spells for example

Sorin's Thirst says "deal 2 damage to target creature and you gain 2 life." with this wording, if the creature you target has become an illegal target by the time the spell resolves (usually by being sacrificed, bounced, or given hexproof), the entire effect is countered and you don't gain 2 life.

the Explosion half of Expansion//Explosion reads "deal X damage to any target. Target player draws X cards." in this case, if the target of the damage is illegal/gone by the time the spell resolves, the card draw part of the effect doesn't give a shit because it's separated by a period. by God you paid good mana for that card draw and with God as your witness you're drawing those X cards whether you hit something for X damage or not.

with Burnout, this means that if the "draw a card" part was lumped into the same sentence as "counter target instant spell if it's blue", you wouldn't draw a card if the spell you target isn't blue. which sounds stupid until you remember that not every deck plays blue* and it's possible for this to be a completely dead card. the current wording allows you to effectively cycle it for something more useful by targeting any spell (even your own!) with Burnout, letting it resolve without countering anything and still getting the "draw on next upkeep" effect. if the rules text was all one sentence, all this would accomplish is wasting 2 mana and a card. this has been your morning MTG Autism Post, thank you for tuning in

*in practice, since this card is only legal in Vintage, Legacy, and Commander, you are actually 100% guaranteed to have someone playing blue at the table. the problem then becomes that this card kind of just sucks even with the lenient wording letting you cycle it with the slowtrip

EDIT: as pointed out in the replies, if you somehow manage to actually fizzle Burnout by removing the targeted instant from the stack entirely before Burnout resolves, you will not draw the card since the card draw is not targeted, and spells fizzle when ALL of their targets are illegal upon resolution. the examples above still hold true, though: since the card draw of Explosion requires you to target a player (usually yourself), the cards still get drawn regardless of whether or not the damage goes through

[burnt-to-cynders]

Alright, time to actually make one of these for real, since this is looooong overdue. Hi! I'm Cynthia! I'm...a lot of things, and I struggle to describe them without it feeling inadequate! I play games, I write software for a living, I write non-software things for fun occasionally, I'm wildly horny, neurodivergent, a massive nerd who constantly wishes she knew more about everything.

Property of: @synthbang and @stalesweetrolls

Let's start with some ID stuff, I'm a pre-HRT(for now!!!) transfem, I go by she/they/it pronouns. My friends call me any fun variation of my name they can come up with, like Cyn, Cyndy, Cyndicate, etc. If we're mutuals, we're friends :3. I'm white, American(New England), poly, t4t, atheist, wildly sapphic, and physically, but not visibly, disabled.

As for interests, I've got literal dozens. Gaming, anime, manga, movies, writing, reading, music, pole dancing, ttrgps, game design, hiking, conservation, activism, fashion, just to name a few, each of which splinters into dozens of little sub-interests. Ask me a dragonball question, I dare you.

Actually, ask me any kind of question. Asks are open all the time and so are anons. Go wild ya horny fools

FOLKS WHO ARE NOT WELCOME (DNIs)

Minors

Seriously, minors, this blog is very horny

Ageless blogs

Sissy kink blogs

Race and ageplayers

SIDEBLOGS

I have two sideblogs atm, although in actuality there's just one that's even remotely active.

@den-of-cyn is where I used to do my hornyposting. The big thing that's there now is the pinned post with a list of my kinks, for those of you interested in the horny side of the Cynner. The account got flagged as NSFT and I haven't been able to get that revoked yet, and moreover I decided to stop worrying about it and just started posting horny on main anyway. There's quite a few good ones on there that I haven't reblogged to here, and a few pics I haven't reposted, so if you somehow don't get enough horny nonsense on this page, you can always go there to see some vintage Cyn >:3

@thebookofcyn is my writing sideblog. It's where all my original stuff will one day live, when I get the spoons to put all my old stuff on it. It is SFT FOR NOW, IT WILL NOT BE IN THE FUTURE! Soon there will be a pinned post there explaining my tags and how to find stories. I'm hoping to post more there as time goes on and I actually embrace this hobby more.

TAGS

I layer my tags and usually don't do content tags, and I don't tag reblogs except to do responses. The tags that mean things on this blog are as follows:

#cynposting - Any post by me that has text outside of tags, including reblog replies. Searching this tag will get you everything I've written in text on this blog.

#cynful thoughts - Any post I think is horny. You can filter for this post if you want to see me being a degenerage, or filter it out if you'd rather not.

#pics of the cynner - Any picture of myself, pretty self explanatory. Most are accompanied by #cynful thoughts

#Cyn fits - pics of myself taken specifically to show off an outfit and explain why I chose it for that day.

#I asked - Reblog of an ask that I sent someone

#ask and ye shall receive - Tag for when I answer an ask

#get tagged idiot - Tag for when the only content of a post is me @ -ing someone in the reblog.

#pinned post - Last one, tag for the previous pinned posts I've made. This should be the last one. In theory.

And that's it!!!! For now. Probably. I'm a wordy bitch, so I expect this'll get longer and longer.

[the-insouciant-scientist]

Character Sheet - Harper

-------

Name + Title: Harper Faraday, the Insouciant Scientist

Pronouns: They/Them

Referred to as: Professor

Profession: Silverer (Ontological Cartographer), Scientist (focus on chemistry, but does a bit of everything)

Closest to: Rubberies

Ambition: Bag a Legend (completed, A Vast Network ending)

Associated stats: Watchful, Persuasive, Artisan of the Red Science

Associated quirks: Steadfast, Austere, Melancholy

Sign of the Chiropteromantic Zodiac: The Lovers

Destiny: The Memory

-------

They say...

"Is that a weasel in their labcoat, or are they just... Oh! It is a weasel! Actually a few weasels. Wait, why are they all looking at me like--"

-------

Backstory:

(warning for vague mentions of both child abuse and neglect, and forced partnership/marriage, also sorry this is a wordy one but I promise it's for a reason lmao)

Isabelle Evans (she/they) was born in 1874 to a lower upper-class family in Norwich, England. She was beloved for what she represented, but not for who she was.

Bear with me, here. I promise this will make sense.

Isabelle's childhood was a lonely one, spent mostly learning how to grow up into a proper lady and trying to avoid her parents' ire. Her education did include reading and writing, to her endless delight, but the majority of it was the usual: embroidery, sewing, violin lessons, how to cook. Not skills she was upset to have, mind you, but what they represented was... less than ideal. The idea of becoming someone's wife one day was horrific to her at absolute best.

Her parents seemingly couldn't strike a balance between harshness and grace in their parenting, and it left her often feeling like she was walking across a glass pane so thin that she could fall through at any moment. She made up imaginary friends for herself to cope with it all, kids her age who liked to talk with her, who were good at the things she struggled with (so they could help when she failed), who understood that her parents weren't just the proud and friendly society folk they presented as to others. Imaginary friends who could hug her tight as she nursed skinned knees and bruises, who could hold her hand when she was scared.

She was eight when she was talking to her parents, trying to understand why they were upset with her, when she realized she didn't feel like she was the one talking. Like words were just flowing forth unbidden. If someone had asked her what her name was, right in that moment, she would have said Eleanor, but would not have been able to say why. The conversation ended with her mother hugging her, a rarity between them, and it had... resolved peacefully? She could hardly believe it.

Thereafter, Isabelle noticed things like that a bit more often. In tense moments, feeling like she was her imaginary friends, or maybe they were her. Perhaps that should have frightened her, but mostly she just felt loved, that she had people on her side for once. The odd forgotten day or misplaced needle case was such a small price to pay for their companionship. And from the outside, it only seemed like she had become more confident, more polite, more ladylike. A bit more forgetful, perhaps, but nothing out of the ordinary.

Isabelle found a small passion in botany and flower cultivation in her teens, and made a few friends as well. Her parents loosened their grip on her a bit as they saw how well she was taking to the life they made for her, and she absolutely took advantage of that. It wasn't an unusual sight to see her racing down the street with a friend's hand in hers, off on some adventure or another. Her imaginary friends quieted, less needed, but were never far when she called.

Things became more tense again as she grew into a young adult, though. Isabelle's parents were keen to marry her off while she was still young and pretty, hopefully to someone with money and power. Isabelle (who by today's standards would be considered a sex and romance averse aroace) was... not keen on that. She scared quite a few suitors off over the years by any means necessary, hatpin stabbings included.

At the age of 24 she was set up with one of her friends from her teenage years, her parents reasoning that she'd have a harder time frightening him off. And so Theodore ________ set to wooing her. She tried to shake him off like she had the others, but to no avail. He was absolutely set on making Isabelle his bride. Even went so far as to ask her parents for her hand in marriage, which they accepted immediately.

And so, with the death sentence of her own wedding hanging over her head, she drove herself half-mad looking for some escape. It was only when she heard gossip outside her window about some strange and wondrous cavern below the earth, where London had fallen to before she was even born, that the gears really began to turn. They only picked up speed when she heard of a card game that, when won, would grant a wish.

She could wish to disappear. Or be free, forever. Or whatever she wanted.

And so the Sentimental Spinster hatched a plan to find a way down there. Some petty crime that would land her in New Newgate, and then she could descend from there. But something went very, very wrong along the way. Maybe if you asked her, she could tell you what, but...

A person woke up in a cell in the very beginning of the first 1899, with no memory of how they got there, and in a body they didn't recognize. They quickly gained the name Harper from their inability to stop rambling. The surname Faraday came later, a name from a newspaper to fill the blank space at the end of theirs.

They made their escape as so many others do, and so Harper Faraday came to the Neath, full of curiosity and an insatiable desire to learn anything and everything they could.

The card game lay entirely forgotten in some shadowed corner of their mind, no longer a driving force or ambition.

There were simply so many other things to do.

-------

In-game storyline (not entirely in order) -

Harper took to detective work almost immediately upon arriving in the Neath, which eventually lead them down the path to the Correspondence, and the University. Their dedication to the truth got them kicked out (in what was honestly one of the worst days of their life that they were aware of) but they made it back eventually, even more determined to bring truth and knowledge to light. And set things on fire with the Correspondence, literally and figuratively.

Originally went after the Vake not as a hunter would, but as a cryptozoologist would. The idea of a batlike monster stalking the night, the likes of which no one had ever seen before? That sounded like an incredible research opportunity to them. By the time their internal compass went from "neutralize and study" to "end its reign of terror and kill it", it was... no longer quite them doing so. The Stubborn Vake-Hunter (it/he) was a self that formed out of necessity. Its sense of duty and single-mindedness was the main reason they saw it through in its entirety, untempted by the knowledge the Vake could give them.

They met Elias Leroux (@the-dye-stained-socialite) in 1899 (the first one) a little over half a year into their time in the Neath, in a bit of an incident at the University. Harper had been running full tilt back to their lab with a flask of colorful but deeply caustic chemicals, and tripped and spilled it over Elias's skirts as they had been wheeling in the opposite direction. They whisked Elias back to their lab to neutralize the spill before it could burn them, but Elias insisted that they try to set the color as a dye because they were so enamored with it. The two of them ended up spending the rest of that day doing nothing but experimenting with dyes and chemicals, and marked the start of a fast friendship. Over the years friendship turned to something more, though, and they were married at the Bazaar on May 3rd, 1899 (1901).

-------

Trivia -

They currently have about 440 weasels, including a salt weasel, a weasel of woe, many weasels of social discomfiture, some araby fighting weasels, and enough lucky weasels to overrun a city. Their favorite is a little cream colored lucky weasel with brown splotches on it, named Florence. It likes to curl up in tight spaces, like in their waistcoat, or in weasel-sized Florence flasks. Hence the name. Harper usually has 3-7 weasels on them at any given time.

Very allergic to grass and did not know this until their first Fruits of the Zee. It's not as if there's much grass in the Neath, it wasn't super relevant before then!

The Chorister's Bomb affected them Really Weirdly as a dissociative system. They and their alters are a bit more distinct from each other since then, although their dissociation is still such that they don't actually know that they're a system. They definitely don't have the words for it. Also I never intended them initially to be a parallel to Veils's different identities and selves, but it really did line up pretty much perfectly.

On the topic of their alters, they have an alter who's a Fingerking. No one knows if it's an introject or just a really confused actual Fingerking who tried to possess them and mostly failed. It's a mystery!

They make tea blends as a hobby, based heavily in flavor chemistry and Neathy history. Their current project is a series of blends based on the previous Fallen Cities.

Harper has a tendency to refer to everything scientifically, frequently using the words 'experiment', 'procedure', and 'formula' in place of more common words.

They're very friendly with The Manager of the Royal Beth, albeit also absolutely terrified of him. For good reason, I mean. They trust him implicitly to be a safe haven if they have to escape from Veils or anything else, but they are Fully aware that his help will come with a cost.

People tend to completely overlook them when they're next to Elias, which is absolutely fine by them given their wallflower tendencies. It's hilarious though when someone accuses them of faking knowing Elias for clout at Their Wedding... which is also their wedding... that they are marrying them at. Which is a thing that happened to them. Most Bohemians and Society folk view them as Elias's freaky little pet scientist, assuming they know of them at all.

Of the bats, they're probably closest to Wines nowadays (post Vake killing) by default. They help clean up at its revels sometimes out of guilt for what they've done. It doesn't care all that much, probably, but sure as hell isn't going to tell them to stop working for free.

They don't like alcohol. Black Wings Absinthe is the only thing they'll partake in, and that's only out of necessity. Was once possessed by Jack-of-Smiles. This surely has not traumatized them :-) (<- lying)

[marsbar17]

Hi, same anon who asked about matchups! I’d like to match up with a masc character! though if there’s someone otherwise who you think would match really well with me then that’s fine too !!

Excuse me if this gets too wordy.

I’m an INFJ and i’d say i have a balanced and composed air to my personality. And i’m usually quiet, which makes people naturally intimidated by me. It’s also because of my straightforward, honest tone when i speak, elegant stance, and gothic fashion.

I’m not mean, just quaint and a bit standoffish until i start to read and understand other peoples energy. It takes time for me to relax a little, and show more of my passionate, spunky, and high-spirited side.

I’m also very whimsical, poetic, and spiritual at heart. I feel emotions for everything, as everything matters to me. I love love love to create. I’ll get into just about any form of artistry but i mainly draw and play a few string instruments. Especially the bass! My music tastes are mainly house, dnb, folk, rock, funk metal. I also do tarot readings and work on my spiritual self which has me “venturing off” sometimes.

And my love language is physical touch ! My touch is always gentle and helping once i’m comfortable enough with someone. I can also read ppl very well…

I think that’s all i can think of. Thank you for reading!

My immediate thoughts with the first part were Bloodhound, and after reading it all I still think Bloodhound but I'm leaning towards Mirage

In terms of Bloodhound here are my reasonings:

• They can respect your honesty with others, and they admire your unique sense of style

• They also would enjoy being around people as spiritual as they are, and would love enjoy any art that you create whether it's poems, music, or drawings

• Honestly, they just like being around people who know who they are and what they like

• Also, they need some love man, they yearn for physical touch they're just afraid of it

In terms of Mirage:

• My man is amazed by literally anything, he'll drop whatever he's doing to listen to you and to tell you that your creations are beautiful

• I have a headcannon that Mirage is into goth people hdhfjskks he's just some guy who is infatuated with cool aesthetics

• He's great at making people feel welcome and comfortable in my mind, man's literally friends with everyone

• He doesn't care if you're quiet, loud, "weird," energetic, he's just like "oh damn new friend :)"

• Also headcannon, he loves every single genre of music, and will jam out to pretty much any song

I'm very bad at explaining the thoughts in my head so I'm sorry this is so short shdhnskqk I'm realizing now I'm not very good at this oopsies

I hope you like it though!

[fruit-salad-ship]

Gladiator AU thoughts time! Plum is hosting a party. Lot of rich people, lot of food and a lot of drinking. Overall, not a fun time for Peach but the job is the job. A crazy party could be the perfect cover for an assassination. One very drunk snob compliments Plum on her new purchase (Peach). Calling her an interesting find and asking her how much. The final straw for Plum was when he offered near double to buy Peach off of her.

I am SO sorry, I got super caught up in this, I've been playing AC odysee too so that didnt help, kind of went off on one. Feel free to not delve into this, because its a bit wordy.

I need so much more of this AU to be a thing...

It had been a month. Peach wrestled with bad dreams every night since, not that it was all that different from her cot in the arena’s depths. At least here she could lock her door and feel like no one would creep up in the dark and catch her unawares. The numerous midnight fights she’d been forced to partake in, other gladiators and staff, even visiting nobles making the assumption that as a woman, she could be had, an item to take, or buy, to claim as their own. She’d ashamedly not won all those fights, nor dodged all those bargains thanks to her old boss, but from that she learnt to sleep lightly, small stints, every sound alerting her, be fierce so no one dares get too close. Even in her new quaint little locked room she kept a dagger beneath her pillow. Everywhere and everyone was danger, just so happened she’d become pretty dangerous too over the years.

Her job that very next day seemed miles apart, escort the lady of the house, that’s it, no fight to the death, no training until your arms ached and legs shook. Plum wandered from shop to shop, business deals mostly, but a little leisure, in passing handing out neatly written invites to some party she was throwing. Every so often she’d turn to Peach, her stoic calm presence flawlessly intimidating to others, and ask her a question. ‘Do you like this kind of fruit?’ ‘What do you think about this colour?’ ‘Which should I choose?’ All of which peach did not really know how to answer. She had spent her life not experiencing much of anything, and now plum was making it her job to expose her to as much as possible, to discover who she was and what she did and didn’t like. Every day a new choice would come forth, and this was peach’s new daily battle, her new arena was deciding what colour she preferred. It felt kind of pointless, petty even, but she humoured her boss none the less. It was after all, her job. Be compliant, play along.

Well this was all amounting to this event, quite the ordeal. Grey had security details increased, several staff on rotors day and night, Peach was paired with one or two other men, all of which made her uneasy, not that she showed it. They were nice enough people, not at all like the folks she’d mixed with in her life, but all the same, better to be on guard than to let people get the drop on you. Staff all over the grounds were tending mainly, cooking, taking deliveries day and night, polishing, decorating, organising. Peach had never seen so much flamboyance in one place. The flower arrangements were the one thing of it all she truly stopped to take in, Plum did indeed pick out something quite special with those. You didn’t see flowers much in the arena, the fighter didn’t know their names, or much about them at all, but Grey being observant noticed her looking them over while bustling around, pausing to catch the rare sight of his newest member of staff being…dare he say it, soft? His approach was loud on purpose, make sure not to sneak up on her, be obvious. “They’re nice right?” His head tipped towards the arrangements in their large vases, noticing Peach back away from them, reinstating her usual hostile posture. “Sure.” She was closing down, playing it tough, and Grey saw an opportunity to follow up on a task Plum had set him, to try to encourage their new addition to make some kind of personal choice, even a small one.

“What one do you like the most?” The question was pointless to Peach, she had been caught out slacking, was pretty sure this was some kind of trap to check see if she was doing her job or not. She shrugged her shoulders stiffly, not saying much of anything. The man tried to soften a little, perhaps he’d come off as intimidating, all she ever seemed to do was shy away from him. “Flowers have meanings you know.” It wasn’t difficult to spot the scar on the side of his hand as he raised one to point at a big white blousy bloom that rose like a spear “Maybe these? They’re called Gladioli, or ‘little sword’ they’re a symbol of strength.” They were pretty sure, but very bold. Peach couldn’t help but let her eye wander over them. “Seems like odd knowledge for a guard to have.” Grey laughed under his breath a little, picking out a more delicate sprig from a Lower point, its small white flowers almost glowing with how the light hit them. “My mother grew a lot of flowers for market, we all had to help with harvest time and selling, guess I retained some of it.” He held out a small leaved branch, taken from the display without leaving a gap, nor changing its appearance, waiting for peach to take it, her hesitant grasp of it eventually allowing him to step away. “That feels more your speed.” He had annoyingly picked out the one her eye was drawn to the most, it seemed to fill gaps in the display more than stand front and centre, next to the more bold flowers it was subtle and dainty. As he walked away back to his job his pace was paused, hearing the woman speak up much to his delight. “What’s it called?” He hardly turned, glancing over his shoulder to try to be a little more nonchalant about her sudden interest. “It’s Myrtle, a wedding flower normally, associated with love and innocence.” He didn’t see her response, keeping his back to her to continue towards his next job. He missed her glance at it, and her brow scrunching a bit, and thankfully for peach, the slight redness to her cheeks. She shook it off, went to put the flower back, but…felt compelled. No one was around, and it was so expertly removed you’d never know it was missing from the display. It got tucked under her red cloak in her armour as gently as she could manage, out of sight, a little secret she tried to protect as she went back to patrol. Her route allowed her to pass by her room, ducking out for a brief moment to quickly place the little sprig in a chipped cup, pouring some water in for it, placed on the window ledge along side three rocks she had picked up that were of interest to her. For a brief moment, with no eyes on her, and no one to see, there was a small hint of a smile on her face, sure it was a little damaged from being hidden away, but that didn’t stop it being kind of beautiful. She carried that somewhat better mood with her on patrol, thinking about it whenever the day was slow.

Grey had passed by Plum’s office, she was busy picking out songs to be played, seeing the musicians amble out of the door as he grew close, giving her a gentle smile as she leant back in her chair, a little tired from the looks of it. “You should get some fresh air, feel the sun for a moment.” He was right, she truly needed to get up and stretch her legs, pacing over from behind the sturdy desk to hook her arm through his. “Lead the way. I trust everything going smoothly your end?” She enjoyed hearing his stories, about his day, as he muddled through all the jobs done, what had been brought at market for the event, the deliveries received, if everyone was alright. They paced down an elegantly arched walkway, the garden bathed in sunshine, finally stepping out into it. It truly was nice to have some heat on her shoulders, waving to one of her gardeners who paused to smile in her direction. “There was one development with your little pet project.” “How is she?” The worry in her tone crept in, was it bad? Was Peach ok? She’d been worried that a party this big would be a lot for her to handle, she wasn’t very well adjusted to social gatherings, but the fighter assured her she’d handle it. “Oh she’s fine. You know how she is, can more than handle herself. Caught her eyeing the flower displays though.” A bright glint in plum’s eyes met Grey’s, a beaming smile following. “Really? What for? Did you ask? Tell me everything.” It was quite entertaining to imagine someone so brutal pausing to enjoy anything due to beauty. “She went through the motions, stiffened up, avoided conversation. I gave her a sprig of Myrtle before leaving, she didn’t know I’d peaked back at her. She went to put it back but tucked it away. Later I saw her dip into her room briefly. Been in a good mood since then. Pretty sure when I walked past her window I saw it in the sun with water on the ledge.” Plums grip on his arm tightened as she wiggled him a little with excitement, a squeak of delight, his gear clinking as she did this. “Thats the best news I’ve had all day!” They continued to amble through the gardens, sweet smells and passing butterflies making it truly an excellent break. Plum’s shoulders slumped into a satisfied sigh. “It’d be so nice if she could just learn to live a little while she’s here. Getting her to decide anything for herself is like getting blood from a stone.” Both could attest to that, she truly had spent 20 odd years being downtrodden, and it showed. “Maybe the party will be painless enough…I hope. You tell her to step out if she’s overwhelmed you hear?” Plums stern gaze set on an elegant water feature, the sound calming. “You know she’ll never shirk her job for her personal needs. Thats not how they trained her, she’ll suffer the discomfort.” Both sat in a quiet contemplation, hoping things would remain calm and safe.

When the party finally came around that evening, as the sun began to set guests arrived. Most in beautiful carts pulled by fine horses. Their staff carried goods and gifts in, receiving wine and kind greetings from the hostess and her entourage of helpers. It was surely a lively get together. Grey maintained a steady shift of guards, making sure everyone got a break, taking special note of their new member. Peach was stoic and cold as ever. She didn’t react to guests looking at her, hardly said a word as she worked. Some guests tried to engage her in conversation, but Plum swiftly intervened and lured they away with promise of more drink, an interesting story, even a peak at her latest business exchanges. She was networking, but trying to keep people away from Peach as best she could. The woman stood in more ceremonial gear, a little more elegant and showy than her usual, shined and tended. It was…different to say the least. She’d only had to wear this once before to accompany Plum to a legal event in town. The fit wasn’t to her tastes, and it lacked some vital protection in some areas, but this was what was required for the job, and so she did it without argument or question.

Glancing across the room was a regular thing for the hostess, she’d tried to not drink too much, kept her eye on the woman by the door who kept diligent watch. This act did not go unnoticed but the guests, one of which approached, his fine robes and decorated hands a show of his wealth.“Quite the find, you must have paid a lot for that one.” His short hair and angular face was typical of the location, a strong profile, sipping wine as he too looked towards the woman guarding the entrance. “She’s certainly an asset to security.” He swirled his vessel before sipping once more, eyes firmly set on the fighter.“Does she still fight?” The pair perched on plush benches lined with finely made pillows.“She certainly does, friendly matches amongst the staff, practice bouts to keep well practiced and sharp.” “I’m surprised you removed her from the arena scene, she could increase in value if she keeps winning. You could sell her again to make a tidy profit. She’s still healthy, strong, has a few more fighting years in her yet I’m sure.” Plum maintained composure, despite how he struck a nerve.“It’s not worth losing good staff over. She could very well die in the pits.” His frame seemed to lounge back, an air of indifference.“She’s just a slave, what does it matter? You can always buy another. Or a dozen I bet for the price you paid.” This guy was a very wealthy merchant who shipped in silks and dyes, Plum was trying hard not to get on his bad side, he could be of value. Instead of taking the bait, of getting mad, she stood, excused herself, and snuck away for a moment for some fresh air, leant on a balcony overlooking her compound. That man was a foul creature, she truly was struggling with his conversation.

Peach noticed her boss slink her way across the room for some fresh air, still within her sight, she didn’t have to change where she was stood, instead overlooking the mass of drunks in the room, some laughing too loud, others eating, all with wine in their hands and a song in the air from the small group of musicians that were posted up in a corner. This had been a pretty dull shift, no trouble, nothing to worry over, Grey handled the outside, Peach and several others the inside. It was late, no doubt this party would go on for hours yet however, a fact that drained her just thinking about it. A very angular man had been eyeing her the whole night, a look that made her incredibly uncomfortable, but she’d managed to ignore it so far. That was until he finally approached. Perhaps full of liquid courage, or just simply tired of being mildly polite in his dealings. With Plum out of earshot, maybe he had even been waiting for her to step away. His body was draped with royal blues and golds, truly colours of opulence, one hand outstretched towards her, fingers brushing some of her hair to one side. Peach’s default reaction was to sneer, but did not move, he was drunk, she couldn’t kill a guest of this caliber. This wasn’t a threat to her employer, just an irritation to her.“You really are quite something. Like a fragment of Mars himself…” His hand fell on her shoulder, squeezing a little, feeling the muscle, incredibly tense, so much so he was quick to release his grasp with a sly if not shocked grin. He hardly looked her in the eye, instead focusing on the rest of this daunting woman, who seemed set in stone. It took everything for Peach not to bash this man with her shield, eyes glancing to where she last saw Plum, her actual job, to keep watch of her. The elegant woman had noticed what was happening and started to make her way across the room, intervened by another drunken party goer, a woman who held her up with loud conversation and praise for the events success. “How would you like to go back to your glory days? You’re wasted here in this mansion as a guard. You belong in battle-“ His form leant in, up to her ear to whisper, cutting through the music and the jovial energy in the room, an act that made the guards stomach turn. “You and I could have a lot of fun, make a lot of coin, keep each other company.” He moved back but not too far to give her adequate personal space, sipped his drink and looked at her over the vessel. She couldn’t say anything, it would all be seen as rude or hostile, she’d get in trouble for it, no question. Instead the guard stood there, her firmly set scowl showing no signs of faltering, he was not getting the message however.“Sorry I stepped away for so long, are you after something? I can get staff to fetch you whatever you’d like-“ “I’ll buy her from you.” He did not take his eyes off Peach, Plum standing looking up at this man in bewilderment, catching her composure.“She’s not for sale I’m afraid-““Nonsense! Everything has a price.” He glanced down to plum with a narrowing gaze. “I’ll pay 20% more than you did. Look, she’s been out of the fighting ring for a while, her price will decrease the longer she’s not racking wins up.” Plum managed to contain her anger, smile sweetly and place a hand on her guards arm in comfort, or even protection.“Like I said, she’s not for sale.” Her stern calm tone started to creep out, the smile disarming, and yet he would not back down, glancing back to peach who’d stayed perfectly still and quiet. Trying not to focus on the few people close by who were catching wind of this conversation.

He had caught sight of her brace, certainly more ornate, the corner of a telling mark only just visible. His hand grabbed her wrist and pulled it tightly to be face up. The unquestionable brand of slavery burnt into her, holding it as if to present it to the guards owner, a reminder of what she was.“She’s property to be bought and sold, she has a price. Everything has a price.” This act made Peach incredibly uncomfortable, visibly seeing her expression turn from anger to embarrassment, tearing her hand away from him to tightly tuck it against her side. She hated that mark, her normal braces covered it completely, this fancy party gear was too revealing, regardless of her overwhelming thoughts of hurting this man, she still managed to keep her cool, one asshole was not going to push her over the edge, this was not the worst she’d dealt with. The man turned to look at her wide eyed, the gaul to retract her hand from him so forcefully, something no slave was to do, not to nobles of any caliber. You could see both women assessing the situation, Plum was calculating her approach to this, trying to maintain trade options with him, but so far he was doing everything wrong with her, and with the woman she’d swore to help be free of this exact thing. While he was initially angry, the man stood straighter, smiled at her, as if scheming or even mildly impressed with her courage, and turned once more to plum.“I’ll pay double. You could purchase two dozen others for that price, all of adequate quality, younger, less damaged, so you can get more work years from them.” He gestured to the scars on the guards arm, the one not covered by her red cloak, glancing down at the leg that was revealed, also littered with old wounds. “She’s not going to last long anyway, may as well replace her before you’re the one stuck footing the bill to get her body removed when she inevitably slips up, bites off more than she can chew.” His disgustingly handsy behaviour went to run his fingers down this clearly uncomfortable woman’s cheek, but a smaller more refined hand gabbed it tight, stopped him. Plum, her anger tipping over, wormed her way between Peach and this opulent asshole, forcing him to take a step back with her behaviour, her grip fierce, rougher than he could have expected from someone so small.“You need to leave this place. Now.” She threw his hand back at him forcefully, her free arm extending back to take Peach’s hand, squeeze it, an act the guard didn’t understand. What was she doing? She was acting as if the man wasn’t right in his assumptions. “For what? Offering you an incredible deal? Dont be so emotional. You women always find ways to twist a good thing!” It took no time for two other guards posted on the other side of the room to be there, Plum had eyed them over this mans shoulder, their approach imminent. “For not hearing me when I said no, a very telling practice in business, I’d not want to partner with someone so single minded and self centred.” The guards joined, and with Plum’s nod placed a hand on the mans shoulder “Dont come back here, you treat people like cattle. It’s disgusting.” The slew of obscenities that left the mans mouth were unkind and filthy, insulting Plum, degrading Peach, and catching everyones attention in the room, many guests turning to see what the commotion was. The hostess smiled, laughed, grabbed her wine, and raised it in celebration, to coax the guests into a calmer state, her sweet demeanour returning in an instant. “Some just cant handle their drink!” Not many had caught the topic at hand, all simply happy to continue their merriment, cheering and focusing back on their conversations. The situation was diffused quickly, leaving Plum to turn and look up at her member of staff. “You ok?” Peach nodded, returning to her position as if nothing had happened, brushing it aside, squashing down any residual shame or rage that tried to creep out. Her job wasn’t to get mad, it was to guard, and that was something she could do, even if her mind wandered the whole time.

When her shift finally ended, and the party goers went home, Peach was freed to ditch the fancy gear, returning to regular clothes, slinking off to her room quietly. The door was locked, and she was freed to rest, mind running over the events of the party. Plenty happened, but that man really got under her boss’ skin. It was normal to Peach, this was the nature of her existence, and sure once upon a time it made her angry, but now days it hardly evoked much of a reaction at all. She kicked herself for the brief moment of sadness that crept in during the fiasco, weakness. A knock at her door snapped her from the thought, getting up to see who was calling, a dagger tucked in the back of her belt before answering. She however was greeted with the small frame of Plum, her arms full with flowers in a simple vase, all that same species in the chipped cup in her window. Peach said nothing, waited for some kind of instruction or task to be given too her. “I’m sorry about that man today. He had no right to act like that.” That felt like a joke, he in fact had every right, nothing he said was a lie, just a bitter reality. “It’s fine, I don’t mind.” Plums brow furrowed at her staff’s complacency about the topic, holding the vase she carried out towards the woman. Peach took it, confused, did she have to take this somewhere? Her quizzical expression was all that was needed, Plum laughed quietly, leaning against the doorframe. “For the hard work, for putting up with that man, for not breaking his arm…although I kind of wish you had.” She chuckled, and even Peach was able to let a smile slip at the thought of hurting him. But this still didn’t make much sense to her, awkwardly holding this thing, a huge bunch of those little delicate white flowers filling the room with a herbal scent. “I…what do I do with this?” a finger pointed specifically to the vase, though simple, it lacked crack or chip, it was finely made with two curved handles either side, not something she’d ever have held or some into contact with in her life outside of patrolling this woman’s home. “Whatever you want, it’s yours. The meadows outside of town have some nice things to put in it when those die, perhaps you could go there on a day off.” For a moment plum got caught up looking at this woman, she looked so lost for someone so capable. This tall, broad, muscular lady who didn’t know what to do with a gift. She however seemed so much softer in her casual togas and soft fabrics, holding flowers, hair messily falling to one side. It took a lot to pull herself away from her, realising she’d perhaps been watching her a little bit too long. “Oh, and here.” Plum rummaged in a little satchel on her side, handed the woman something wrapped in leaves, and smiled. “Get some rest, ok?” Unsure of the correct reaction, Peach was left standing with this huge vase of flowers, a weird little parcel, watching her boss walk her way back to the house. It clicked the proper thing to be done, the guard leaning out the door and calling after her. “Thank you!” Seeing Plum glance back, smile and continue to leave.

Back inside with the door once again locked, the fighter set this way too nice vase down on the small table by the window. It…felt out of place for her to have something like this, she wasn’t a thief, so why did it feel like she was right now? Maybe she could sneak the vase back into the main house, just in case someone blamed her for taking it…such a shame though, it really was nice. Aside from her Little Rock collection, and the sprig from grey in that little clay cup, this was the only decorative thing she had in the room. The first little shred of personality. Her tired body sat on the edge of her bed, still looking at them, eyes tracking to the other item, leaves? Tied with string. It smelt sweet. The dawns light filtered in, she should have slept, but instead rummaged for the book she hid under the bedside table, opening up the little package to investigate. Inside were three round little pastries, she’d seen them at the party, honey and poppy seeds, not something she’d had before, nor thought to try. There was a blissful moment where she sat back, a blanket that wasn’t itchy, a room that smelt of flowers, a snack that was possibly the best thing she’d ever eaten, a door she could lock, a window with a view of trees, and a book she was slowly managing to read now she had time to grow that skill. She had truly been lucky, thinking back to that day Plum and Grey walked in and negotiated to buy her from the arena, she thought for sure things would be just as bad if not worse.

[cewyll]

hii! i found your blog by accident and i'm mesmerized. i used to play rp on twitter and i really wanted to start doing the same here but idk where to start. could you please give me some tips?

oh hey, thank you so much for reaching out! :D i'll admit i'm not as active on this blog as on others, but it makes me happy to have reached you nonetheless. <3

i'd be delighted to give you some tips to start out! it's definitely a process that feels a bit alien at first, but over time you get a feel for it. :>

i am soooo sorry in advance, this is going to be super long — you picked a wordy bitch to ask 😂 but i'll try to format this in a way that's easier to read!

take your time to go through stuff & no need to read or absorb it all right away. feel free to keep this post bookmarked to look back on whenever you need it as well.

💖 welcome to raine's stupidly-long guide to starting tumblr rp! 💖 qualification: i've had this blog for 11 years. fml disclaimer: still all just from my perspective, i'm just one gal with opinions hehe

start out by making a new blog for your character. (i wouldn't recommend starting out with a sideblog personally, since you can't send asks from them). choose a url that feels relevant. i'm always a fan of the ol "smush two words together that sound nice" technique — ie, my other blogs are huntershowl and icarusplunged — which never seems to fully go out of style. really you can do whatever feels right to you :)

the most important part of setting up an rp blog is creating a rules page and, if you're writing an OC, an about page. the rules set up your boundaries, your wants and don't wants, anything you want someone to know before they follow you. the about page should give new partners everything they need to know about your character — personality, appearance, setting/lore, any backstory you want to display publicly.

feel free to look around at different rpers' rules pages and use them as inspiration! as long as nothing is copypasted and everything is your own original content, which brings me to etiquette.

etiquette!

'tis largely an Unspoken Thing in the rpc (rp community), and breaching it can def make people feel uncomfortable (even though that's something that Should be in rules pages, most of us forget haha). here are the things i can think of off the top of my head:

the way to reach out to new people is simply to follow them. that's all you gotta do! if they don't follow back, don't push, just unfollow them after a few weeks and move on. it's almost never personal!

in that vein, if someone's blog is private/selective/mutuals-only, wait to interact until they follow back.

once they do, it's up to you how you want to move forward — usually i'll wait until they post some sort of interaction call for you to like. a starter call, a plotting call, orrrr if they reblog an ask meme (which is like a list of sentence prompts! you can choose one from the list and send it as an ask, which they can use as an rp starter.) you can also just IM them though :)

don't reblog non-rp content (ask memes, quotes/imagery, etc) directly from another rp blog, it clogs up their notifications! just reblog from the original post instead.

don't interact with other people's threads (liking or reblogging, but feel free to read them and talk about them ooc!), and only respond to a starter if it's labeled as open — otherwise it was probably written for another rper specifically.

try not to prod people too hard if they haven't responded in a while. some folks are okay with being reminded about a forgotten thread a few weeks after replies stall out.

always tag nsft (not safe for tumblr, the other acronym gets flagged/hidden) and very upsetting content — gore, SA or abuse mentions, etc. i've seen some people starting to use "dead dove do not eat" as a catch-all for super dark content, but honestly that phrase gives me the heebiest of jeebies so i prefer to go with individual tags

general platformless rp etiquette rules apply: don't steal other people's content, don't assume or control the other character's actions/thoughts/etc.

be kind to each other, most of all. communicate when you have a problem with someone, rather than making a vague/callout post about them. that being said, i'm a proponent of the block button — blocking people is okay! it's not a big deal. this is a hobby space and no one is entitled to you. advocate for yourself!!

okay that was a long section, whew! lil break. take a sip of water. have a snack mayhaps.

now: RP STRUCTURE (the fun part)

we don't really do "script" style rp on tumblr — it'll usually, if not always, be in prose/paragraph form. formatting is a fun touch, but not necessary. as you can see, i'm using small text here with some little chunks of text in bold/italic or regular size text to add some visual interest. again, not necessary! experiment, figure out what you like!

lots of people will use icons of different sizes — 100x100 is the most common, but they really do vary. i would suggest going smaller rather than bigger (like don't use full post-width gifs or icons, try to keep them under half the size of the post? that's the most common vibe at least.)

icons can be used to "illustrate" your character's expression among a bunch of text, if you want Visual Spice. but they are soooo not necessary! totally up to you.

here are some examples of my icon styling!

there are lots of rp resources out here for cool coloring psd's and graphic templates for ya blog. create something fun and pretty that you like! <3

to reply to a thread, reblog it and add your post.

important: i highly recommend downloading and installing XKIT in your browser. it's an extension that lets you trim posts to the last two reblogs (common around here), customize your blog experience, and just makes it a lot easier to exist on tumblr haha.

ummmm i think that's it actually! you're finally free of my rambling. i really hope this helped!! please let me know if you have any questions, and gimme a follow when you start up a blog — i'd be happy to help you out however i can.

[defiantbird]

Sweeney Todd Revival on Broadway!

Saw it over the weekend and have had some time to marinate on it. As a former theatre (or tech) kid I have to throw my thoughts into the void. I'm serious, this is a long and wordy babble, you are not gonna read it all, I'm really just thought-dumping.

Cast:

We were told as we were entering that Josh Groban, the big draw for most folks, would not be in to play Sweeney. Sweeney was instead played by the guy who usually plays Pirelli. I don't know much about Groban, but I do hear he has a great voice, so I am a little bummed I didn't get to see it.

Still, other guy (Nicholas Christopher per the slip) was...obviously talented-- everyone in the show is extremely talented, it's Broadway. Tremendous voice on him. He had an excellent growl and did my favorite thing (in Epiphany, he went UP on "nor a hundred can assuage me" and it was so STRONG and RAW and AAAGH I love it. Here at 2:22 if you wanna know what I mean. George Hearn is my fave Sweeney.). That said, his Sweeney wasn't my cup of tea. George Hearn ruined all other Sweeneys for me (hyperbole tho). This fellow was a bit stiff...like, he has the sound of the rage but not enough expression of it to get me, if that makes sense. He was explosive but it often didn't feel like a passionate rage, just a loud one.

Certainly a very different Mrs. Lovett (Annaleigh Ashford) than I'm used to. She wasn't my ideal Lovett (again, spoiled by Angela Lansbury), but I can recognize that she was still an excellent one. Gorgeous voice with impressive range, super animated. What was different about her, I think, is that she played her more self-aware than I'm used to. It was a little more "this lady is funny and she knows it" rather than "this lady is fucking weird and it's delightful". But, again, just because that's my preference doesn't mean this was any less good. Very slapstick, way hornier, but ultimately very much understood the character at her core.

The kid who plays Dustin in Stanger Things (Gaten Matarazzo) played Toby! It's clear some people were there just for him. He has a strong singing voice and is just super charming. Truly a treat that I got to see him in this role, I think he fit it really well.

Such! An! Interesting! Johanna! This girl (Maria Bilbao) had a really unique take that I kind of loved. She played her like a bird-- twitchy, always on the verge of panic-- which is such a great choice given the symbolism around the character. I want to scream how much I love this: it ties her to the "Beggar Woman"! Lucy was also very twitchy and jerky, what with the being crazy and all, and it was such a smart way to subtly show that these two are related without the audience being able to realize the connection until the reveal.

Pirelli (Daniel Torres), my beloved. I've never seen a single bad Pirelli.

The guy (John Rapson) playing Beadle Bamford was SO hammy and it was SO good. Super flamboyant, expertly annoying and able to switch so quickly to smarmy and cruel. His timing and tone in Parlor Songs was so fucking funny.

Judge Turpin (Jamie Jackson) honestly kind of took me out of it whenever he was around. He played Turpin as sort of a creepy but ultimately frail geezer. To me, Turpin is usually meant to be like large and intimidating and overbearing. He's an enormous shadow that swallows people. This one to me was just sort of...a grandpa. I didn't feel the evil enough.

Anthony (Jordan Fisher), also my beloved. This guy had, IMO, the most beautiful voice of them all. Like, so beautiful that the sound itself, not the subject matter, made me teary at times., especially during Johanna. Had just the sweetest face and most charming demeanor- didn't feel put on at all. So earnest and naïve and passionate. In general just "have you ever heard a voice and seen a man so beautiful that you cried".

Not much to say about Lucy (Ruthie Ann Miles), and not in a bad way. She had a beautiful voice and played the role well.

Set:

So cool! The show starts in London, with just Sweeney and Anthony standing in front of a bridge. The bridge then becomes the upper room: the flashback for Poor Thing, the upper parlor, Johanna's window. It was abstract for some scenes, like Johanna's window, but it felt very natural. Like there was literally no window, just her looking out between the rails, but you got that it was a window. What was, if I remember correctly, a crane on the side rotated to become the stairs leading down to the cellar, with the "meat hatch" on the back. Again, not sure I'm remembering correctly-- the set is very dark at times and purposely makes you think you're looking at something entirely different-- but I believe the same part had this little niche that became the asylum. Also, of course, the chair. I don't think I have a single complaint about the set. It was clever and wonderful.

A/V:

In the beginning, in his first few lines in The Ballad of Sweeney Todd, Sweeney's mic wasn't working. I hissed internally. It was only a few seconds but I felt the "NOOOO" inside of me that I guess comes from having spent a lot of time hanging with the guys in the A/V booth in high school productions.

I really liked the lighting for the most part. What struck me most was when the ensemble sang. The fog rolled around their feet, the stage entirely dark but for them. At the end Ballad when they were all lined up at the very front of the stage ("Isn't that Sweeney there beside you?" "There! There!"), the light shone up under their feet and gave them this gargoyle-ish look, so stark and deliciously unnerving. My only complaint was this like bright white flashing during City on Fire, but tbh I don't really love that scene anyway, I think it's kind of out of place, so whatevs.

Another petty thing that's less me saying "this was bad" and more me going "nooooooo"- Johanna shooting Fogg...her action didn't quite match up with the bang. Oof ouch.

Choreography/scenes/songs/general thoughts:

The flashback sequence of Poor Thing seems to be done differently every time I see it, but it's always good. This one was really abstract but incredibly striking. Todd and Lovett were lit up below in the shop, and above them it was all silhouettes on the bridge. Lucy moved like Johanna (again, aaah such a good choice), twitchy and nervous. The scenes weren't direct portrayals as it usually is (i.e. Lucy cradling the baby, Beadle and Turpin calling to her, Turpin descending on her at the party) - it was more like interpretive dance and it was very compelling.

Ngl, I didn't enjoy A Little Priest as much as I normally do, although the audience clearly loved it so, y'know. Art is subjective. But Lovett was a little too over-the-top (at one point she collapses laughing on the floor and propels herself around in a little circle), and I didn't get a real sense of mirth from Sweeney.

There is this point in the show, in general, that I love because of the audience. The play is funny. It's really, laugh-out-loud funny. Some scenes are just absolutely ridiculous and it WORKS. But there is a point-- it sort of starts during Not When I'm Around but really kicks in after Parlor Songs, which is like the last funny moment. You spend the whole play going back and forth between Sweeney's intense brooding and Lovett's looniness, and it kind of lures you into lightheartedness despite some of what you're seeing and hearing. It all gets SHARPLY cut off (no pun intended I swear) when Sweeney kills Turpin. The audience goes totally silent and stays that way 'til the end. It's SO well done, it just makes your stomach drop, it takes your face in its hands and says "now here's the real shit". The silence pulls you in and it feels like everyone is holding their breath.

Hehehhehehe I love catching reactions of people who haven't seen the show before. I saw at least one person with their hands over their mouth when they realized the beggar was Lucy.

There was some really great new little things I loved with Sweeney and Lovett. At the end of A Little Priest, instead of the two of them standing there triumphantly, they both slam a butcher knife and a rolling pin down on the table in time with the final note and then the stage goes totally dark.

In the same vein as the above- at the end, usually Sweeney and Lovett kind of look at each other from opposite sides of the stage and then it goes dark. Sometimes there's a door slam. In this one, they turn their backs to the audience and walk through the fog toward the back of the stage. In the very final moment, they clasp hands and jump together into an unseen pit. Like they literally walked hand-and-hand into hell. Internally, I'm making high-pitched sounds over how much I love that.

The ensemble was fascinating. Lots of jerky, kind of interpretive movements. In the beginning Ballad they do this thing where they all simultaneously start drifting to the side and then they suddenly stumble. In God, That's Good! they just sort of slowly lay Toby down on the table and then drag him off. It was weird, but a very intriguing kind of weird. It really unsettled you, which I think the ensemble as "the people of London" is supposed to do. They are meant to be unpredictable, dreamy, listless, and at other times wild. Neato.

I'm sure there's more I can say but I can't think of it right now so let's just stop me here because I've been writing for over an hour. Overall: Really enjoyed it, would recommend. I do wish I knew what Josh Groban Sweeney was like though.

If you actually read all this: Did you see it? Tell me what you thought! I truly really would love to hear about it.

[izzy-b-hands]

So. I'm allowing myself a vent post or two abt Stuff in the Brain today that won't fuck off, but it'll all be under a cut if I feel I'm at risk of being too wordy so folks don't gotta see this if they don't wanna. And on this one I did get wordy, multi-paragraphs so. fair warning if u decide to be brave and read thru it lol

I'm behind on getting Mum a bday gift. Like two weeks behind. Partially bc money, partially bc the thing I really wanted to get her involves bidding on ebay and attempting to win a listing (and I just haven't managed it yet lmao), and partially bc like:

For once I've been living my life for me, thinking abt me and Housemate first and foremost, and focusing on what I actually want/need from day to day, and that means I'm away from my phone a bit more than usual, which means I've missed some calls and texts from Mum and just haven't been as Available via phone/apps/etc as I've been in the past

(including one time in the last week or so where Housemate and I stepped aside to the kitchen to make ourselves mac n cheese, and Mum was late to calling me for a planned call, so I figured I was safe to leave the phone by the couch while we cooked. Nope! In that less than half hour, 25 mins at most that it took us to finish mac and get plated up, she figured we'd both A. fallen down the stairs and were now dying from brain bleeds while the cats sniffed us in panic and fear B. decided to cut her out of my life forever and so now I wasn't going to be answering her calls (tho this point I didn't know until a much more recent text where she admitted to it and did say she was ashamed of feeling that way.) )

So I really need to get something out to her, either the chocolates I was planning on sending for her and the family from a local shop, the Snoopy Build-A-Bear plushie with a lil 'I miss you' tshirt and a voice thingy inside it with me telling her to remember that I love her and am always grateful for her help and care and things like that, whatever will fit lol (this is the fucker that triggered this whole train crash of a set of thoughts today lmao), and/or something from one of the ebay listings I've been trying to get (I just need to accept it and pay the buy it now price considering what the thing is isn't like. Uber rare? But apparently Bon Jovi doesn't have their figurines made any more, so they're a bit harder to find and I'm gonna risk not getting one at all if I don't just. do the dang thing lmao)

I'm thinking the Snoopy would be best/easiest for rn, but I keep getting stuck on what I'll say for the recording and it's so dumb but like:

I know, for the sake of both of us and the deeply grown and intertwined sort of emotionally incest-flavoured codependency Mum and I have, we probably should eventually try going NC or LC for at least like. a month or two in the future? Probably even a bit longer? Not as like a 'this is forever' thing (unless something would happen that would point to that as the best option for both of us), but just until we can maybe both heal a bit and work closer towards something even vaguely approaching a more normal mother/son relationship.

And the particular fear is very silly but like. I'd hate to say the things I have planned, that I mean (I do love her, and I know she does her best, and so I'm grateful for every bit and every sort of help she's ever given or will ever give me), and then we someday go NC or LC, and she's hurt by having the plush and audio around as a reminder of how things were before. I could see her throwing it away in a fit, and then being so sad and begging for a new one by the next day. And I'd want to get her one. I don't know if that's right of me or not.

Like, the trauma has me Entirely overthinking this and I know it's ridiculous, you know? But still. Got the Build-A-Bear tab open on my phone bc the chocolate is at least partially to be shared, so that's Not Enough as a partial belated bday gift; and I'd like to hit another paycheck (or part of it, since the uni rarely puts the full fucking direct deposit in on scheduled payday lmao) before I try for the Bon Jovi figurine (and hope it isn't bought before that point.) So the plush is really the best choice, and I don't want to wait any longer to send anything out bc like. Her bday was at the beginning of March, this is fucking ridiculous of me and not how I like handling gifts at all, for anyone!!

Fingers crossed I just. Get the fucking recording done, get it ordered and have them send it out to her, and that'll be enough until I can get my hands on a figurine and/or order the chocolates and candies for her, her bf, and to share with the rest of the family.