#with the people who dont take responsibility whatsoever

[geniemillies]

i will never be convinced on rhysand the better high lord when tamlin opened his court to refugees during amarantha's reign, began celebrating festivities that didn't belong to spring just so they'd feel at home, played for them too with his silly fiddle omg, refused to send his people beyond the wall until he was desperate, felt them die because their bond as subject and high lord was just too great (sarah's words not mine), even buried a lesser fae in his court after he was brutalized by amarantha, dug the ground with his haaaands, said lesser fae wasn't even his subject but he offered him peace and company during his death anyway. then there's mister change takes time over here, has his people living in harsh conditions in camps, under a mountain where they cannot leave because they're more weapons than people. so if you were born anywhere in his court that's not velaris sucks to suck i guess.

don't even get me started on his family being in charge while he was gone for 50 yrs because their circus troupe didn't do squat either. cassian is a privileged boy who has lost all emotional connection to his own people. idk what azriel does besides do a job he doesn't even want to do and mope around i guess. morrigan hates her people, morrigan 'i'm the exception, everybody evil except for me and i will make no effort to change anything bc im too pretty for that'. amren. amren wtf even is she doing in the night court. not even from the lands and she's already named second in command, that's all i have to know about the high lord. what is she commanding? *in damian's voice* she doesn't even go here!!!

tamlin did more for spring and people from other courts in those fifty years than the ic will ever consider doing for the night court. morrigan couldn't lift a pinkie, if you mention doing anything for hewn city she'd start whining throwing up waa waa waa, grown ass woman. cassian kisses the dirt rhysand steps on, if he says bark he out here 🐕. amren is just there for shits and giggles. azriel.

so if anyone sat on their asses it's rhysand and his ragtag group of powerful people who don't do shit with it. illyrians still suffer in the camps, hewn city still trapped in a mountain where abuse is the norm. and they aaaalll stiiill haaaate youuur aaaasss 💥💥💥💥💥

[listen-to-the-inner-walrus]

.

[kaidatheghostdragon]

Halfas and Fear Gas

Ive seen a lot of "fear gas makes danny high." Its hilarious and i love it. Other variations i recall seeing are: fear is not as potent, complete immunity, 'food supplement' fear gas, and the boring 'effects him like normal.'

BUT.

I haven't really seen anyone treat effect effect on the brain and core as separate processes. In other words, humans get affected one way, ghosts get affected another way, and halfas get blasted by both.

We already know how normal humans are affected, so we dont really need to go over that. Ghosts, however, are free reign. (Unless there's a canon incident where a ghost like boston brand or gentleman ghost are exposed to a fear gas attack? Any DC canon nerds out there that know of something like that?)

The options I've seen or thought up so far:

Complete immunity - ectoplasm just doesn't react to physical matter in a way that impacts the ghost. Fear gas, as in the chemical itself, has no effect whatsoever.

Effects ghosts like humans. Straight forward, it's a bit weird if you think about it, but eh.

Fear gas, as in the chemical itself, is like ghost weed, or perhaps something stronger. Might be hallucinogenic, but in a bad trip sort of way rather than a worst fear sort of way

Fear gas, as in the chemical itself, is accidentally a super effective health suppliment for ghosts

If emotions are food to ghosts, fear gassed humans can span the range between 'delectable snack sprinkled with extra sugar' to 'weird chemical food that isnt healthy but will still sustain you' to 'supercharged health snack completely saturated by nutrients'

Fear gas, either the chemical itself or the people affected by it, has a distinct smell. It could be good, bad, or neutral, possibly related to how it affects the ghost. (Or deceptive, for humor and/or angst.)

Fear gas is outright toxic to ghosts. Perhaps the chemical itself is similar to, but just left of, ectoplasm. Like many artificial chemicals that can substitute various nutrients / usurp metabolic pathways in humans, it could have any number of mild to debilitating, short to long term effects on ghosts.

(If anyone has another idea, feel free to add)

Now we get to halfas, who have both a human brain and a ghost core. Dany has a human body and brain that are affected normally by the fear gas: hallucinations, panic attack, adrenaline response, etc etc. Someone better at biology can describe the actual biochemical processes going on.

But the ghost core? Added on top of All That? Can be excessively angsty, somewhat mitigating, or outright hilarious.

Going through the list of options:

Complete immunity.

This sounds boring, but its actually my favorite. Why? Because danny is getting conflicting signals. His brain is compromised and in full panic, but his core is telling him that he's completely safe. As a hybrid, Danny could be capable of having critical thought with both organs. If he's clever enough to recognize the seperation between the two, he can exploit it as a sort of anchor (I'm imagining it somewhat like how a multitasker can do different things with different senses, like listening to an audio book while solving a jigsaw puzzle - the book is auditory, the puzzle is visual and tactile, neither interfere with the other.)

Danny, in this scenario, is definitely in an altered state of consciousness, seeing things that aren't there and right on the cusp of panicking or defending himself. But if he can recognize that his core is unaffected, he can focus on the sensory input that his core is processing, and the whole situation might be somewhat equivalent to becoming lucid in the middle of a nightmare - its terrifying, but just the recognition that it isn't real takes the edge off. To him, it's now like being stuck in a VR horror game and being unable to take the headset off, flinching at all the jumpscares but recognizing that his body isn't actually being attacked or injured.

Affects ghost like humans

Danny could either be affected exactly the same as anyone else or effectively double-dosed as both brain and core fight entirely different hallucinations. Maybe if danny is lucky, he'll just black out from the sensory overload.

Ghost weed

This could make what was initially designed to be a really bad trip into something catastrophic... or mellow it out. Idk. I've never done recreational drugs. Both the brain and core are cut off from reality. The brain is terrified, and the core is tripping out. If his core naturally reacts to his emotional state, it's gonna amplify the effects, which is Really Bad. If the core is compromised to a point where it can't really process anything, then Danny is still trapped in a nightmare state, just more loopy and otherwise no worse than any human.

Health supplement and/or literal food

This one is confusing. Brain is terrified, core is satiated? Energized? A boost to his powers is gonna make him much more difficult to contain and treat. When he comes out of it, there's real potential for angst from danny worrying that the conflicting emotions of absolute terror and hunger satiation are a sign that he's turning evil. Especially if his core was instinctually feeding off of the fear of nearby civilians who were also gassed during the trip. That undercurrent of predatory satisfaction is gonna leave him awake at night for a few weeks.

On the plus side, feeding his ghost core might help it clear out the toxin faster, so the trip is much shorter. Maybe he even pulls out of it before he accidentally causes any damage with his powers.

Smelly

Pretty straightforward. If it smells bad, Danny is automatically gonna hold his breath, limiting his exposure. If it smells good, he might take a good few wiffs before realizing what's up and holding his breath, or just keeps dosing himself more and more as that effects, good or bad to the core and definitely bad to the brain, settle in.

Toxic

Has the potential to be much more long-term and insidious. You can run the full gamut here. Does he need to be restrained and taken to the far frozen for days or even weeks of treatment? Does the ectoplasm incorporate the drug, and Danny has to suffer weeks or months of microdosing until it's used up, turning him into a paranoid schizophrenic during that time? Is it blood blossoms 2.0? Does it have no mental effects but screws with his powers? Does it influence his emotional self-control? Does he grow the ghost equivalent of a tumor that encapsulates the toxin and has to be surgically removed? Does he need supplemental ecto to remain healthy, temporarily, or permanently? Does it affect his ectosignature or peak power level? Injure his core? Lower his healing factor?

All of this is on top of the initial fear gas trip, which he may have never even fully pulled out of. The angst possibilities are endless.

Then, there are liminals who have the potential to be affected like halfas or in an entirely different way. Does your headcanon give them proto-cores or baby ghost cores, or are they just severely ectoconaminated? How would that change their symptoms?

Anyways, just some ideas for people to use. My favorite idea so far, that I'd love to see someone use, is that Danny has learned to use his separate brain and core as insurance against mind control and mind-altering drugs. The freakshow incident was a sort of catalyst that helped him recognize the differences between his brain and core, and he taught himself how to lean into one or the other for various advantages in different situations. (Sort of like how a person can lean on either logic or intuition to make different types of choices.)

There's a lot of interesting potential here. Essentially, Danny could teach himself to be immune to mind-control and greatly resistant to drugs, as he can evaluate his surroundings with both organs and identify differences. Mind control wouldn't work unless it targeted BOTH brain and core, as he could shift to the uncontrolled one to break away. Any drug designed to knock out or roofie a human is countered by the fact that danny's core still remains conscious of his surroundings, and creative use of ghost powers counters the accompanying paralysis.

If ghosts dont sleep, one could argue that Danny's core is in a meditative state when his brain rests, which is why his ghost sense can wake him up from a dead sleep - he's never fully unconscious. Workoholic danny could find a way to get homework or paperwork done, or solve a problem, or design a piece of tech, or even play a videogame, while 'sleeping,' even using ectokinesis to move stuff while his body is sleep-paralyzed. Sleep-deprived danny is still functional because his core isn't affected by his brain's lapses in consciousness from micro-naps. (He is a lot moodier, though. His core is more emotion-focused while his brain is more logic-focused, on top of the normal mood-swings from sleep deprivation.)

This version of danny, after being fear-gassed, immediately recognizes that his brain and core are suddenly experiencing two different realities. He would be able to talk himself down from a panic attack and slowly find his way to safety. He probably wouldn't trust himself to hold back if he got in a scuffle, but he would be coherent enough to vaguely understand his surroundings to avoid danger.

And lastly, something I dont recall seeing in any fics - if the bats encountered fear-gassed Danny, and he's aware enough to refuse an antidote, I dont think the bats would push it. Yeah, forcing more medical trauma on our favorite blorbo is all good and fun, but he clearly has an altered metabolism that was affected differently by the fear gas than normal, so there's a heightened risk that the antidote would also have an altered affect, for the reward of removing the effects of fear-toxin (which is no longer guaranteed), which danny is already showing he's capable of working through.

On top of that, medical professionals are not allowed to force treatment if the patient refuses them and can walk it off. (If they are unconscious or can't get up on their own, they can intervene.) Medical conditions and allergies are a thing too, and its the priority of the patient to inform the medical worker as soon as possible to prevent complications. Jazz may have coached Danny about "in a medical emergency, declare closet-meta status with highly modified metabolism and unknown reactions to most drugs."

I see the conversation going something like:

"If you can hear me, im going to administer an antidote."

"Dont. Give it to someone who actually needs it."

And then the bat treats everyone else before approaching danny again to ask how they can help. They would be trained to take all of this into account:

Human male, visibly uninjured (unless the fic writer has different ideas) experiencing non-standard reaction to fear toxin. Probable indication of meta or enhanced status.

Victim is cognizent, replied to verbal communication, denied treatment. Appears to be managing the effects of the fear toxin. Not currently a danger to themselves or others.

Nonstandard reaction to fear-toxin implies potential non-standard reaction to antidote. Victim may be aware of medical condition that could complicate treatment, and is reasonably stable at the moment. Further questioning needed.

There are other victims in the area that are less cognizent, they become higher priority. Approach victim again when all other victims are cleared out, (in case of uncontrolled meta powers, to avoid further casualties), ask more questions and ascertain situation.

Once questioned further, danny drops the memorized line about altered metabolism and unknown effects, and giving Danny the antidote basically immediately becomes a non-viable option. They will probably argue Danny into being taken to Leslie's clinic, as he'll refuse a hospital (probably quite hysterically, given the fear toxin), which i'd imagine is the bat's normal protocol for closet-metas.

At least, that's how I imagine the situation panning out. Danny noping out before the bats return to him or during mid-interrogation is also extremely likely, which is gonna put the bats in panic mode for the next several hours. (Going to *any* secondary location with the bats is a non-option to Danny, for many potential reasons.) Danny is definitely going on a watch list (as in, possible meta with unknown powers, keep an eye out in case he gets caught up in another rogue scheme, need more information).

[magical-oppas]

I cannot believe that people are so disgusting that I'm here defending a Piquet but here we go.

It is NOT your responsibility to take care of Max's well being. It is NOT your right to have an opinion on his private life. You do NOT have any right whatsoever to drag her daughter into this.

Do I agree with everything she does? Absolutely not but you know what I do? I dont follow her on insta, I dont keep up with what she is doing, where she is going. If she happens to post something about Max I just go to her account, take a look and then go on about my day.

You dont own Max. You just like watching him drive a car, that is where your "relationship" with him ends.

Get. That. Into. Your. Head.

Max will never thank you for looking out for him. Max will never lie awake at night and go "you know xyz on twitter? I'm glad they harrassed my girlfriend today". Max will never fuck you.

MAX IS A FULLY GROWN ADULT MAN. HE DOES NOT NEED YOU TO DEFEND HIM AGAINST HIS OWN LOVED ONES.

If you have ever actively hated on a wag online, sent them death threats, harrased them in their comments etc you are not welcome on my blog. Block me. Never interact with me ever. And yes this also applies to anyone who has followed that vile kelly hate account on tiktok, even if you did it as a "joke".

If you disagree with anything I said too bad, womp womp go cry about it. I will not argue with anyone who thinks its ok to blindly hate a person for being in a relationship with someone you happen to find hot. So that rant you are so bravely about to send me on anon? Delete it. I will not waste braincells on you.

[cupcraft]

How do we begin to deplatform abusers in content creation circles?

It takes fans of course. There's a lot of posts talking about this (from me and many others).

But we also need to talk about fellow ccs. And their role in being complicit in abusers platforms.

It's not just the ccs who openly and brazenly go "I support them/they're innocent". It's in the ccs that mention them, its in the ccs that quietly unfollow but don't say a single word at all about it (and don't post anything supporting the victim whatsoever), it's in the ignoring the problem, it's in the treating abuse in some cc circles as not abuse (ie when ccs treated dreams allegations as "minecraft shit" or treated it like controversy and drama and not srs grooming allegations in which minors were harmed). It's in the liling a generic "support victims" tweet and thinking that's enough. It's in the moving on without a word. It's in the allowing ccs and ccs that openly support abusers to attend content events, to attend tournaments, to attend conventions. It's in the staying friends with them or speaking highly of their work. All of these things contribute to platforming abusers. Its in the way they speak over victims and make jokes about their story and dont apologize for it (thinking of xqc hasan and ludwigs handeling of adrianah's experiences) All of these people are complicit in abusers in their industry.

The way to destroy abusers is to not be silent. It is to speak up and support victims the way that they need. It is to hold both the abusers and their loudest defenders accountable and to keep them away from gaining power in their career. It is not just unfollowing quietly and pretending that's enough. And don't think it's impossible don't come here and defend your "fav" and say it's too large of an expectation. It's fhe bare minimum. And it's always funny, to see that it's always the women and genderqueer ccs that speak up first. The men are often silent, the burden of supporting victims in their career doesn't fall on them.

Demand more of your ccs as you do with fans. To destroy abusers in these industries takes approaches from both aspects to keep victims and others safe. Demand more of your ccs they aren't helpless or without responsibility.

[spyroz]

i dont reblog those posts about how hard it is to have moralizing ocd in online spaces, even though i deeply resonate with them. ironically, i can only talk to 2 people about my ocd, because one of my obsessions is that other people will assume im using my mental health as a shield against criticism if i talk about it. therefore, if i talk about my ocd in any circumstance, my brain believes that i'm already doing something immoral

basically, most of my obsessions resolve around people assuming bad faith of me or that i'm somehow secretly an irredeemably bad person, no matter how hard i try to be good. i am a bad person if i dont reblog posts about serious topics, spend every waking moment thinking about extremely serious topics, or make any social mistakes whatsoever (which is scary because i'm also autistic). i believe that i am irredeemable if i make a small mistake, and i often think all my friends are waiting for me to make a mistake so that they can attack me, and that my life will be ruined if i fuck up. im constantly scanning all my interests (and people i know) for the tiniest imperfections (far beyond healthy amounts of criticism in your interests) out of fear that liking anything or anyone makes me a horrible person. if you dont take a side on this lgbt label discourse, then youre a bigot! im ALWAYS mentally preparing responses and apologies to totally theoretical situations of people being upset with me. i have intrusive thoughts about doing the immoral things that scare me most.

the problem is, *talking about* any of these thoughts invites people who will actually bad faith me. "if youre so worried about this stuff, then you must have something to hide! you just want to avoid accountability!" they make your obsession a reality by accusing you of the exact thing you fear most. none of these thoughts are reasonable or realistic, and i know that. i know that i'm mentally ill. i know logically that i'm as good a person as anyone else. when i actually do make a mistake, i stay level-headed and apologize, acknowledge what i did wrong, and change my behavior

but there is a large part of me that does not want to heal from my ocd, because i believe constant self-monitoring and self-critique is the only thing preventing me from becoming a horrible person

there is nothing i want more in this world than to be a good altruistic human being who is capable of growth, but spending weeks trapped in thought loops analyzing all my behaviors for the smallest signs of a mistake will not help me be a better person. it makes me a worse friend. it drains my energy so that i dont have the mental capacity to actually spend time being kind to others. i reread this post many times while writing it to make sure i didnt accidentally write 6 different slurs. but i can't figure out how to heal. what the fuck do i do about this

this is incredibly hard for me to write about. i'm fighting the urge to delete this post as you read it. i cant stress how debilitating this is for me, it is the biggest hurdle in my life and it sucks away days worth of my time and energy. i will become trapped in thought-loops THE SECOND im not kept sufficiently busy and stimulated by tv/music/my bf/being out of the house somewhere/etc. so much of my life is wasted wanting to be good, that i dont get a chance to actually live the life of a good person

i really hope this post resonates with someone. ive only met a few other people who have this particular kind of ocd, and its extremely isolating. but i want to try to heal from it, and i know the first step to healing is talking about it

[magical-glimpse]

Would yall like me to make a list of the the red flags i look out for in readers ? It is quite a personal list but i guess it can help people who reallht dont know how to go about it ?

///

YES PLEASE DO

✨Red flags in BTS tarot readers ✨

what do i mean by red flags ? I mean little things that, when added up, can lead me to block or ignore a reader because they are not accurate or responsible. This is a personal list, according to my own values, and my experience on what tarot can or cannot do. If you don't find it helpful then just ignore me and make your own lol.

a reader who does not have any boundary whatsoever (accepts everything or does not say what they do not read on)

a reader who never refuses a reading on any topic

a reader who genders people they dont know the gender of (calling future spouses Mrs or Mr, gendering them in readings)

reads on appearances ( tarot can give clues in personal readings, but it does not accurately predict appearances)

openly ships certain people together

openly likes one member over the others ( i dont just mean biasing, i mean their entire blog is 90% one member)

dedicates a whole tarot blog on one member

has no problem reading on rumors

claims to read in order to "spill tea"

entire blog is about "spilling tea"

never explains where they get their info from: tarot? oracle ? intuition? clairs ? No friggin' idea bro.

shit talk the members or the people they are supposed to read on

says one of the bts' members energy is dark or manipulative

says a member or FS uses "black magic"

does not have any idea or even opinion on the theory behind tarot, just pulls cards and hope for the best i guess ?

cultural appropriation

gets kicked out of a member's energy, comes back, is surprised it's hard to read on them again

acts almighty about the fact they can read tarot

acts aggressively towards innocent questions

doxxes people

a reader who does many readings, every day, never stops, never takes breaks. Tarot takes energy, if someone can pull many readings daily they are either a super saiyen of tarot endurance or bad at actually reading.

Someone whose FS readings of members weirdly pairs up with their own characteristics

Someone whose readings are dragging a member or a FS through the mud (ex: saying jk is toxic and manipulative and a cheater, saying taehyung got someone pregnant and forced them to abort, someone using the very real fears from within the kpop industry to target an idol with no other proof than "tarot")

thinks "divine feminine" and "divine masculine" are determined, or linked to in anyway, to biology

created the blog before and making posts before learning tarot, their very first tarot readings are bts tarot readings,( unless they explicitly say their blog is for learning purposes )

you dont actually learn anything from the reader, they never explains the process, or the answer or anything about tarot

their readings are always extremely positive or extremely dark for no seemingly good reason

readers who acts like they are never wrong

readers who share leaked pictures from paparazzi

readers who call a FS some sort of honorific name or put them on an inhumane pedestal

readers who claim themself (or others) are the FS

readers who act childish in general

I guess there could potentially be more, but this is what covers my bases as of rn. Feel free to add more so we can discuss them.

[mnemyo]

a VERY long essay on V’s Day 7 Visual Novels as a Rika lover

.

while rika is an extreme version of this, to many mentally ill people “unconditional love” comes off as very burdening, especially for a character like rika who everyone who ever “loved” her before always had a lot of expectations for her to fufill. On a less character defined level,

V’s “unconditional love” is also a trap of sorts, in his story rika describes the “darkness” in herself. you see, if you dont show rika affection whatsoever she doesn’t tell you the root of her ideology, however, if you side with her in the rika vn sequences she tells you the story of her darkness and light (im aware she explains some of it even if you reject her but there is more when you embrace and sympathize with her) basically her analogy is

her darkness is not inherently born in her, her darkness is the trauma and negative feelings others inflicted onto her in her upbringing.

the darkness used to externally present as tears (sadness) until people responded to that, too, with more darkness.

In response to that darkness, she developed severe anthropophobia (fear of humans) until she was able to suppress her phobia by finding a way to suppress her crying. her tears stopped coming out but they were still there behind her smile, just welling up on the inside until she was so full of tears. the body needed to expel tears because there was no more space

unfortunately, the way the excess tears came out wasn’t by the physical tears coming out, rather, through extinguishing her own darkness (harming others, abused becomes the abuser) she lists these things that would expel tears: cry, yell, and do something others would hate.

(at this point you can comment on how you think she’d be pretty when she’s finally able to cry and notably rika is grateful but comments that the mc, too, looks like shes going to cry, this shows the scene is meant to be in a sympathetic lens)

continuing her ideology she says one day she found a devil swimming in the tears inside her.

the devil whispered to her her incecurities: that she was unlovable, that her fiancée secretly hated her, that she was worthless.

This caused her to cling further to V (her fiancée) because the ‘devil’ was sustained by her tears, and she desperately wanted to kill that devil by drying her tears. V has an obsessive ideology with loving someone like the sun, drying all of someone’s tears and vanquishing the devil inside them, an unconditional all encompassing love.

while V encompassed her in this love, she had a realization that this devil that kept telling her she was worthless and unlovable, was actually herself, the herself that was deeply hurt in her childhood and was alone for so long. immediately she became terrified, terrified of this man who so devotedly wanted to kill her devil she asked him to spare the devil, to stop this sun like love that would one day reduce her to nothingness but he refused, so she ran away to start a cult of people, like her, so filled with darkness.

she actually comments at this point that she wont save those in agony through freedom and charity (the way she tried to get mentally better before, by starting a charity organization) and that not everyone can be saved by freedom and charity, rather need fear and salvation.

another interesting thing is that she says V will never be right in rejecting her ideology UNLESS he sacrifices himself to blind her with his light, in which case she would lose everything (this happens in another route where he dies for her and she permanently enters a catatonic hollow-to-life state where she can’t even talk and is sent to a mental hospital abroad because no one can take care of her other than a specialist) she ends this conversation by posing the mc a question. when she one day has to make the decision (this conversation happens during v’s route where you get together with him) the decision being independence (what she chose) or stableness (v’s all consuming light)

there within hides the reason why the game says v’s all consuming, sun like love is negative. theres 2 reasons

1. his all consuming unconditional love is self-sacrifical and is thusly even more burdensome

2. this also expands on part 1, this love is stable but also causes a deep codependency, even if V did “fix her” who would she be? she only knew herself as consumed by darkness before but who would she be after? a product of v? v’s wife? she wouldn’t be able to recognize herself

she also states that to her love is both light and devil, love being described by her as the duality of trust + healing but also obsession and possession. she then states that v’s love doesn’t contain any obsession (while sounding negative a light version of obsession in a relationship is a good thing, think your thoughts being filled by your loved one and with possession theres jealousy and a desire for them to stay with you) without those two aspects the love is only light and endless undeserved trust is a bad thing and too much healing doesn’t let one take time to process each stage of a deep set wound, healing is meant to be a full process and sometimes there needs to be pauses in the process to *be able* to mentally process

another thing rika comments is that v wants her to torture herself which is what starts her explaining her darkness ideology, even commenting that no one ever asked her about her darkness before

this is concerning because if no one asked her about this before that includes v that means v knew next to nothing about all her trauma (theres a lot)

non conclusive list of rikas trauma:

- shes an orphan abandoned by her parents

- she was adopted by a abusive religious family and was abused and even implied sa by their priest (i’ll get back to this in a second)

- when she ran away from her adoptive family she went to a lot of trouble to find her biological family, not her parents rather her step-parents (this doesn’t really make sense as a statement but thats what she states, probably makes more sense in og korean) and said step parents also abused her!

- she was also bullied in school for being a not cheerful girl

she states to all this trauma that she didn’t even know there was light in the world, since all she’s known was darkness, that she thought she was born to be tormented and tortured or she wouldn’t have a purpose to live

now going back to the catholic priest abuse, this is most likely why she sees herself as the devil and why devil isn’t an inherently bad thing to her.

all this really to say that while a lot of what rika did is inexcusable like man after that whole life she lived + when she ran away to start a cult V instead of telling her friends and cousin she was mentally ill the entire time she’s known them he tell them that she killed herself! because he is so dead set on “shouldering the pain he caused on his own” he socially isolates the only other people who can show her light, ESPECIALLY since rika comments that the RFA all have their own darkness.

Thank you if you’ve read this far! I have a lot of thoughts about Rika my friends are sick of me. This is not to say any of rikas actions aren’t bad by any means but I think she’s a wonderfully complex character that i find easy to sympathize with and for any fellow Rika lovers (or someone who just wants to understand rika more) I would recommend reading the day 7 vn’s in her own words, she says more details if you side with her more.

[tf2heritageposts]

you can take this as a joke but i'm the actual anon. i thought you were actually posting pro cop stuff and didn't know it was part of the game. i am a poc. i know you don't believe that but the reason i got so upset with you is because of how often my voice and the voice of my friends have been stepped over by white people who claim they care about poc. you're one of my favorite tf2 blogs on tumblr and i really got emotional and just wanted you to acknowledge poc voices because i felt like you were ignoring them. so many of my favorite creators big and small do that. i wish that i knew sooner you were not actually making demo a member of the police. again i don't want to come out with my real blog because i am scared but i am genuinely sorry.

i really don't think your a racist and that your choice of wording only came off as racist because i didnt know that it was the game's wording and not yours. i believe you are a good person and not racist. again, you are not a horrible person and i really don't think anybody who was questioning your choice thinks you are. i just wanted to see genuine acknowledgement of poc voices and overreacted. i'd like to see a more nuanced explanation of your casting more than drunken sideburned man so i can actually understand what you're talking about. again i am really really sorry and didn't even realize i was coming off as harassing you. i got emotional and take responsibility for any stress ive caused you. i dont know how i can make it up to you but im going to donate 10 dollars to your gofundme as an apology because i really did not mean to cause this and thought i was wording things politely. i'd donate more but this is really all i can spare right now. i am autistic and can be too blunt while thinking i am being fine. i hope you reach your funding goals and again i am very sorry.

i’m gonna take this as the actual anon and say i accept your apology. i completely understand why you could interpret it as me making demoman a cop, and i understand why you’d get emotional about it. i promise, i do NOT like cops whatsoever

have a good day anon :]

[loving-n0t-heyting]

I realize you are unlikely to be a receptive audience for this sentiment, but while I agree that people are wrong to take mere panhandling as an immediate threat to their life and respond with force "in self-defense", I think it is important to realize that they are responding to something that really is worth being wary of, and which is taboo to discuss in polite society. At the margins, there is a spectrum between begging and mugging; this only really applies to the very most aggressive beggars, but as with any group, more aggressive beggars are disproportionately visible. There is clearly a very socially relevant Type Of Guy who is mainly a beggar rather than a mugger because of his cowardice, a circumstance which one would expect to gradually shift as he grows more desperate; it is this type who is responsible for phenomena like people hurrying past beggars or otherwise avoiding them, not some nebulous socialist-friendly bogeyman like racism or bourgeoisie guilt.

"you are unlikely to be a receptive audience for this sentiment" well i mean A+ on yr theory of mind if nothing else

i suppose the first thing to say is that i dont see how fearfully treating all beggars as would-be muggers until proven innocent is really supposed to be distinct from "socialist-friendly bogeyman like racism or bourgeoisie guilt:" similar rationales are at play in the common paranoid demonisation of blacks and the poor as vicious imminent threats abut whom responsible self-interested members of society must tragically exercise perpetual vigilance. in fact, you might think mentally conflating all members of a group with their worst most dangerous representatives is kind of the hallmark of all bigotry whatsoever

anyway ig its true there are plemty of beggars who mainly do not rob passersby out of cowardice, and who can be expected to indulge in this temptation when and as the incentives against robbery weigh less and less heavily relative to other concerns. the same is true of every other segment of society, this being a principal reason for the existence of like, criminal law. put this abstractly you are correct but in an uninteresting way bc the same could be said of any large class of ppl to begin with

also i dont buy this stuff about terror and hatred of the homeless being unmentionable in polite society. the cali legislature is gonna count as polite society if anything does, right? the same one that virtually unanimously passed the CARE act? seems like it was pretty mentionable there!

[marabarl-and-marlbara]

yo, mara i really like your "i dont want to be friends" response to the "can we be…." asks i always picture a cool girl that makes other girls go "カッコイイ(￣ω￣)" when you say this, its so awesome in its honesty+raw

hi anonymous;

honestly: i hate saying that, and things like that; there:s an important ideal underneath my personal feelings, there, that makes it feel important to say, in-kind;

in-part of bacterial will i need be shut-off from people and establishing relationships (i still fail here, and make plenty of excuses here to have them, though: still can:t perfectly adhere to ideals);

in-part because it seems more painful if i don:t be the deranged-moron in the conversation willing to be upfront about unsaid things; as i don:t think most of the people who express liking me, or wanting to have closeness with me, or converse with me, actually like me whatsoever and in-stead craftsome persona or paragraph that appeals to "the idea of what i:d like" & engaging with it seems like (for me) leading them on to some connection i don:t want to provide, and slightly more isolating than if i:d just been ignored completely (put misanthropically: "another conversation that is nothing but empties"); further: there:s grossness in seeming like i:d deny the aforementioned issues and try to connect despite that, as a manipulation where i:d be rewarded from playing-along and furthering-along like treating a persons feelings as part of a business model to create a Strong Fan with great impressions of having interacted me; instead: i just act like a deranged deadbeat moron who follows some programming (like a harmful bug) to say "I will not be your friend; I will not give you advice; etcetera";

i wanted to consider making a group discord for people who support me on substack, both because 1) i want to provide some community to supporters because i do (sincerely) value them, 2) i want to reinforce the connection there from substack and not let it wither in the way being aloof-deranged-deadbeat-moron isolate causes connection to wither, 3) i want to spread the faith where i can and need people warm to me to inherit or adopt those beliefs -- again, being isolate hurts this; the Shadow of all these things is the hidden [4th] cause of bacterial will that suggests caring whatsoever about the prior three is being drawn in-to the connective mist and light of server and the invisible things within that light: of course, becoming enraptured in connection and relationship and be drawn-in deep with rewards and love and good-feeling and incentive; and the [4th] issue staunches (poorly) the desire and opening up to community can:t be, and won:t be; adhere without thinking to programming and the bacterial will will flourish inside a hermetically-sealed type of faith; and it all sets unwell inside me; and i feel a longing i have to ignore, and a sense of dedication allthesame like blindness being passed on-to me by a hand of Lord God as-though it were Acts as-though i were of the goat separated from herd as-though it were St Michael (is that right?);

sermon notes from today, take care, anonymous; bad number of paragraphs in this message but it aligns with the subject matter.

[djpachipikachu]

omgomg i’m so interesting in you usagi/tmnt iteration!!!

okok first what’s like.. the starting point/inciting incident of the story if there is one?

second what are the characters personalities/inerests like?

HAIIII excitedly kicking my legs

the start of the main plot is when usagi goes back in time and is forced into the tmnt’s era of time ,,, he accidentally comes across an ancient relic in the woods with spot (these woods are made of massive ancient trees with equally expansive entangled roots , like if the ocean itself had been a forest instead of filled with water it is kinda horrifying) and it takes him and spot back to the tmnt era , before the relic itself was even created

i do plan on making a comic for this so it wont start out immediately like that but itll have some like . oneshots/episodic comics of usagi’s adventures before that happens, similar to usagi yojimbo’s way of storytelling

PERSONALITIES!!!! WEEHEEE!!!!!

usagi:

most similar to usagi yojimbo, a mature but still like . silly kinda guy ! in the usagi era he takes joy in chatting with people he meets on his travels, incredibly polite, loves to tell stories of myths and gods to children

although most of his days are spent alone with spot , his steed (spot is like horse sized)

he tends not to attach to people or things very much because he knows how easy it is to lose everything, so as much as he enjoys talking to people, he keeps his distance.

he doesnt dedicate himself to being a hero or anything … he will help if he feels people need the help but all hes really trying to do is survive on his own

hes basically like a formless side character . forced bystander in this story

its for the character development i promise

leo:

cold

hes the leader/general of an army, a bit harsh in his personality, doesnt want to be approachable or get close with anyone

hes stern and quiet and kind of a workaholic, his brothers think he needs a life outside of being a leader and Only a leader

tired ! so very tired !

a lot of shit that he internalizes

however a very strong leader and strategist, he is well trusted by those who follow him and they know that his main priority is to get everyone out Alive, more than fight for their cause

he protects fiercely , just insanely bad at showing it . the worst at social things out of all his brothers easily

forced to be an adult at a young age so he never rly got the chance to form a personality outside of his responsibilities

she likes reading in her lonesome though

raph:

PASSIONATE ! ABOUT MANY THINGS !

theyre the sibling that goes out the most and interacts with people on personal levels the most out of everyone ! they have a good rep in the general yokai public !

they do have problems with anger but a lot of the time they channel it into training newbie recruits , the main motivational speaker , they know how to encourage and pump ppl up

a bit recklessly bouncy in how they fight, imagine rottmnt mikey’s energy with mutant mayhem raph’s enjoyment of fighting

the most down to earth out of all their siblings . arguably the most mentally stable out of necessity

they love feeding pigeons and they teach lion dancing to a children’s dance group in the city !

donnie:

obnoxiously gen z . good god . insanely chronically online . most similar to mutant mayhem donnie

he doesnt go out like whatsoever Partially bc he has chronic fatigue syndrome and its easier for him to just stay home, partially bc his brothers are over protective of him and dont want him fighting in the war

so he helps from afar, piloting drones, targeting firearms into battle, building gear for everyone

he likes engaging in arguments online . most exciting thing to him . little fuckass teenager this guy

kendra is his worst online enemy and rival but also like . his only friend . rly sad . joking is his coping mechanism

he loves researching and learning things, it takes up most of his time when he finds a topic to extensivelt research and take notes on

his main interests are the usual coding, engineering, etc As well as the inner workings of mystic power

mikey:

most sociable next to raph !! a very altruistic spirit

he’s most similar to idw mikey i think , most upbeat and relaxed kinda nature !

However . he’s not at all as emotionally aware as any other iteration mikey

he’s very strong in his opinions, stubborn about being right, can very easily fall into a black and white point of view about things, its hard to get thru to him

he loves to dance the most, its how he uses his mystic power

whew okay yeah they might not be the Most accurate bc im still ironing out the main traits but here they areee

[black-salt-cage]

sorry it took me a while to come back, the replies are right, and i didnt use any specific labels because its a super wide range of people and labels, i asked because you said radqueer DNI and sometimes people will include anyone who has a trans identity outside of gender in that- regardless of if we're radqueer or not. I wanted to make some stimboards with these gifs, i wouldnt have asked otherwise, im really sorry for the confusion. I have that like, "autism made me super scared of being misunderstood" issue. i know i shouldnt ask otherwise i was just worried because of that because radqueer doesnt really have a solid definition and sometimes people include things that arent inherently radqueer. i have race dysphoria myself and consider myself trace (lots of us dont use the term transrace because of the problems it raised with 'transracial adoptee' so it gets shortened together to trace, tracial, etc.) and im more than aware that my like, life. is controversial. same with my transpecies friends. sorry for asking, i really wasnt going to, and i get no pleasure from asking these, im sorry if it seems i was trying to start anything. im just really used to violent hate so i get nervous/

okay, I'm gonna try and word this as nicely but firmly as possible. If someone gets upset at my response to this so be it, but know I wish to make myself nonaggressive but transparent in what I have to say. I'll be putting this under the cut because this pertains to discourse, and if you don't want to see it just skip this ask.

If you identify yourself as radqueer or consider yourself as part of the community then I do not want your interaction. Despite what you may believe, I have seen far too many radqueers show glowing support of maps, aams, zoos, and other such things that I find despicable to support. To any radqueer identifying person that reads this and thinks I'm wrong, you have a right to disagree with me. Maybe you don't support things like pedophilia and zoophilia, but too many radqueers do, and I find that the community itself provides a safe space to such things as the basis of it's beliefs. I'm not sure if you are saying you consider yourself radqueer anon but if you do, I'd like to politely ask you not to engage with us or our content as I don't feel we have any productive words to exchange with one another. That goes for anyone who's radqueer.

For therians or transspecies or whatever anyone calls themselves that may apply to such a category, that is something that I can't say I exactly relate to, but like most things people do with their own lives that doesn't have any effect on anything or anyone other than the person themself, I don't really care what you do.

Now. Here's the part I don't think you're going to like. I'm gonna tell y'all something about myself.

I am white. 100% white. This system is within a white body. I have not and will never experience any form of racism, cultural appropriation, or what have you that could ever affect my life in any negative way whatsoever. What I AM is transgender, and have openly identified as such for more or less a decade at this point. I also live in an area that does not take too kindly to trans people and have had slurs thrown at me in broad daylight out in public because I was very clearly not a cis woman. To quote what you said in your last ask:

"its just there's a lot of misinfo and regurgitated transphobia surrounding the topic, and im no stranger to helping educate and clear away misconceptions, im sure as a profic blogger youre familiar with situations like that."

I find it offensive and, frankly, insulting, that the topic of trace, or transracial, or whatever you wish to call it, would be considered a marginalized group that would fall under the topic of "transphobia". My reality is that I have people in my every day life who weaponize my gender identity against me. I'm sure you hear comments online that aren't very nice. hell, I'm sure you've heard some very mean and nasty ones. I do not think anyone should be harassed or bullied for any reason.

But while you may not realize it, that comment in your last ask was incredibly condescending. I do not need the bigotry I face on a daily basis explained to me. I am very well aware of what it's like to deal with transphobia on a day to day basis, and I don't appreciate the implication that I'd need to be "educated" for not outright supporting something that I cannot blame people for thinking is racist.

I'm not here to tell you what to do, and I sincerely doubt at the end of the day anything I say will change your mind. In fact I anticipate that you probably don't like me one bit after answering and I can accept that. But I cannot say I support it. I'm white and I'm planting my butt in my lane where it belongs, and I have heard many poc speak out against it for incredibly good reasons, and I agree with them. I don't wish ill will on you nor do I know what your story is, your feelings are, or anything of the sort. But I am not the person to go to for validation on this.

So in case it's not clear I'll make it clear now: I don't support the concepting of transitioning to another race, regardless of whatever word you wish to call it

[the-holy-ghosted]

Putting on my sunglasses again wow hello another anon about Ghosted (2011)

Care to share your thoughts about what happens after the final scene like wow how do these characters spend the remainder of their sentences after such dramatic events. one really does have to wonder *points the microphone in your direction*

ok putting on my spoilers hat again but im not putting it under a cut. if you feel like watching ghosted then dont read this post. if you dont feel like watching ghosted then feel free to listen to my rambling madness

anyways i think that after the final events of the film where jack and paul """reconcile""" and it cuts off i think they do truly reconcile afterward. i dont think theres a bone in either of their bodies that is not enraged beyond belief over what the other has done to them but theres also no bone thats not wracked with guilt for what theyve done to the other in return. very deeply, they believe they owe each other. although it was jacks own fault for getting put in prison, i think paul very much does feel solely responsible for having ruined his whole family. (something something do we remember jacks "what do you know about it? what its like? to take someone's life and know that youve ruined so many others?" that he spat at clay.. i think paul knows very intimately) and he feels he owes jack what he can never give him. he owes him a son, for one thing. indirectly, he owes him a wife. he owes him a happy family he couldnt return to after doing so much time for a mistake that ended in the loss of a life and although it was pauls own fault for getting put in prison, for what its worth, what else did he have going for him? he had no stable family and no consistent friendships and paul was essentially forced to grow up impossibly fast and skip out on all the nice parts of growing up. having people who loved him. who wanted to take care of him. who knew him and who he didnt have to lie to. at the end of the day yes paul did it and it hurts jack more than he could ever tell him but hes so young... jacks already gotten his payback. god hes probably responsible for so much physical and mental damage and weeks upon weeks upon weeks of physical therapy that will get paul to a place that is funtional but nowhere near as capable as he was before. paul ruined his life but hes ruined pauls, too. in a way he owes it to him to take care of him for that. he owes paul some semblance of stability. and for jacks own sake, he needs to keep an eye on him and make sure he doesnt ruin anybody elses lives. to make sure nobody else hurts him.

in a nutshell i do think they stick very close together after their altercation. for the remainder of their sentences and to an extent once they get out, too. who else do they have, now? neither of them have anybody they want to see outside waiting for them. they have destroyed each others whole lives and they need to keep each other as close as possible because of it. theres no moving on from this whatsoever with what they know of each other and how theyve already bonded in the three months they were together. what can they do but stay that way? they will collect what they are owed from each other one way or another

... also this is only partially related but i do believe that for the entirety of jacks time in solitary confinement, he didnt know that paul was alive. he was fully convinced that he'd killed paul and was able to come to terms with that. i think it just adds a good layer of emotion on top of everything to think that hes only informed that pauls been asking for him, tha tpaul is alive, after hes let back in with the rest of the wing. he didnt prepare himself for this outcome and, as depicted in the scene, looks to donner in disbelief and then starts to cry before he even sits down next to paul. i think it would be good. i think it would hurt him real bad

[skybristle]

more sparks please. girl what happened to you and do i have to kill anyone

rbs > likes

These two. dw shes already fucking them up. hashtag feminism! [they are also both women]

these two n what they do to her [i wont go fully into it but just elaborae since i already summarized it here in my post abt maw but]. yeah. When she was constructed she was a very ambitious iterator and very. jittery and eager to help her kind and very very radiant. probably the perfect iterator!

of course.... as ive probably heavily alluded to ash is a POS ! as her senior, and the only one in their group at the time, she looks to him for guidance and feels so terrible finding out how fucked up he is with his own colony and how he is struggling to bear it [he IS depressed and chronically ill however also just. has zero accoutnability or responsibility whatsoever and refuses to recongize his mistakes ever or consider his actions beyond what he receives from them] so of course as they fall for eachther and she helps him shoulder his burden he simply takes it for granted and does little to return the favor. its soo unbalanced and unhealthy but sparks is just trying and trying because god !! she wants to be good !! she wants to help people !!! so fucking bad!!!

but shes left bleeding alone, in an overextended structure as they operate on her while shes awake, overclocking her systems and sendinf electricity like lightning down her puppet, he basically messages maw Once to try and get her to knock it off before falling back into his patter nof laziness like welp! did what i can do ! and has the audacity to whine to sparks about feeling inadequate. and she really has no choice but to get back up and dust herself off and live with this reality, which persists quite literally forever, even if its less stressful when her colony eventually leaves. and she stays stuck in this delusion that ash couldnt have done any more and that it was just unfortunate and.. he still needs her help she cant leave him in the dust [what did he do to her again?].

especially as their local group slowly grows and he kind of refuses to accept the responsibility so sparks is also shouldering mentorship and taking care of them and etc. the only exception really is whispers who isnt allowed to speak to sparks because their colony is an asshole so they grow close to their designated senior and ash actually does take the kid kinda under his wing as much as he sucks, mainly at sparks concerns initially.

shes also. super badly traumatized by maw and a lot of that fear and paranoia echo especially later on when maw *actually hurts another iterator*. shes well aware how much maw resents her and maw is the only thing to really scare her. over time sparks loses her whimsy and just becomes very calcualted and dilligent. takes little pleasure in it anymore but if shes not working shes nothing, even as she makes her issues and overextension worse she hasnt rested in ages.

once mass ascension happens and ash bascialyl goes 'welp im done. see ya'll' now that nobody is literally there to make him do his job and goes into sleepmode completely disregarding all the work sparks has done for their group and for *him* not just to appease his colony on his behalf thats when she finally breaks this delusion she has and fucking snaps. she still is kidn of in the position where now shes FORCED To hold authority because hes gone but doesnt bother to try with those who dont answer to her. shes just so angry and frustrated and just workaholics it all away but its really. its not helpful long term and this anger is just building as things in their group get worse and worse as he sleeps in the distance none the wiser.

and, finally, when whisper's emergency broadcast rings true and all hell breaks loose- and he wakes up and the first thing he does is crawl back to sparks to make her do his shit again without even acknowledging his abandonment for many many kilocycles she just completely fucking loses it on him. dedicates herself to- rather than try to put ehr group back together and aid whispers, she just charges headfirst into hurting everyone whos ever hurt her. im still trying to figure out what goes on with maw but as for ash. she creates the brainiac to steal his seniority but also just hijack his structure in an incredibly painful manner. just so she can feel her pain. oh, and just like her, she wont have anyone to crawl to for sympathy [being needlessly cruel and ignoring others suffering? sounds a lot like maw. disregarding the needs of your group to chase a selfish goal as someone lay dying? sounds a lot like ash. lol. lmao even].

after she gets the seniority crown she starts having a guilt crisis. then whispers. uhm. Well. Escapes starlight's can and jumps in the void sea [ive been alluding to it this whole time but nobodies said anything so. ill just lay that here and let u guys react] she finally realizes how badly she fucked up [thats what makes her better than maw and ash] and what shes done and how much shes kind of fucked over her bridges with the people who actually cared about her [chimes and ochre especially] and. yeah. i need to piece out what happens after this still but i mean starlight and maw r still kicking around and sparks now has the responsibiltiy to do SOMETHING which would probably resul in violent retallion from at least maw and kick this bs and sparks hurt and anger up all over again. lol. lmao even.

[simcardiac-arrested]

AKNDMN,S okay so

juts a fair warning this is a very long ramble so like. people reading this be careful you might be stuck here forever because you cant put read more in asks for some reason

I don't have any updated references for Six Silver Stars (the one who's very mad at one guy) so she won't. have any images.

She was created with the idea of mapping stars and planets and stuff so her puppet chamber was built outside of the can and made out of glass with her puppet arm attached to the roof of it. im sure this creates no issues at all whatsoever. anyways the main ancients that monitored her and talked to her did not like them. which im sure doesnt create any issues whatsoever. ive fallen in love with the idea of schools organising trips to visit the puppets of iterators so she made friends with this one kiddo who wasnt super social with the group. kid was often granted permission to visit her chamber and they'd often talk and just bond. kid was part of a fancy-ish family who was very devoted to the void. bring in Unnamed Iterator because i cannot think of a name

art and design not by me by a friend btw.

anyway they were made to bless people and prepare them for the void. like the people felt that they were ready and they pretty much just said 'yeah good luck' and gave them offerings and fancy robes and masks to hopefully make the void favour them slightly. Kids family went 'yeah lets all dip in the void and take our like. 15 year old kid with us this is so cool of us' which then left Stars pretty alone as her ancients often just. blocked communications for her because they were soo amazing(sarcasm) Stars immediately turned all blame onto the guy because its all she really had to blame. she didnt know the parents of the kid and she obviously wouldnt blame the kid so yeah. this guy was the blame.

this guy also worked very closely with Swirling Blossoms, Fading Fast

(again art and design not by me i saw this adopt and my brain went yesss) as they both had similar but different jobs. They made to be a god directly to the ancients, a place of worship, offerings and confessions. she was built with taboos SUPER SUPER SUPER enforced into her code like to an ungodly amount. also was given a lot of 'ancients need help you must help them they dont mean to do anything wrong ever they need help.' again i am sure that this didnt give them any issues surrounding themselves and their ancients at all. both them and unnamed guy communicated a lot and slowly started to date in secret which was Really Weighing on Blossoms because ''dont grow attached to anything thats a sin thats a no no ''

this continued to weigh in on her and like. a little while after the mass accession somehow messages between them got leaked. like not anything gross just typical couple stuff. not sure how this happened yet . but yeah, she was Very Stressed OUt About This despite like no once giving a shit. panic lead to her making dumb desicions and she ended the relationship and isolated herself. a lot 👍

so during this unnamed guy is like acticly trying to fix two relationships, one with someone they barely knew but felt very very bad for and one with their ex.

starts continued to do not very good and was exceedingly pissed at unnamed guy because before the mass ascension her communications were blocked and no one is able to break them or undo them. so like. they were sending scugs back and forth to Stars who was just like "Dude FUCK OFF you fucking killed my kid " and his ex was just sending them back with no response. theyre so fucking fucked over and a sopping beast and theyre not okay.

anyways theres more but this is also like. a brick post thats not very well organized so if youre still interested i might talk more about them in another ask

DIVORCE NUMER UNOOOOOOOOOO