#with me sitting by my dog sobbing for 3 hours about how I was going to have to put him down

[baejax-the-great]

A little life update:

Porthos has been back from the ICU for a couple days. The vet indicated there was nothing else they could do for him, and that we were pretty much bringing him home to have a last good day or two before saying goodbye.

Porthos has responded to all this with a resounding "fuck that" and has decided to get better. That, or he hated the vet so much he was willing to die about it.

Anyway he's like. He's fine. He currently grumbling at me because I wouldn't give him a cheese curd.

[slyblonder]

Sweet Treat

Friends w/ benefits!Mark x GN!Reader

(reader has afab anatomy)

word count : 0.7k

“Wheres my treat?” “Your what?”

You and Mark have been friends for a little over two years, but only friends with benefits for about 6 months. This all came into agreement after a very wine drunk, slightly stoned,bored mentality. You were attractive. Mark was attractive(and big). What’s the worst that could happen you thought and agreed.

You hate to ring your own bell but the dick is AMAZING. Going into this you would’ve never guessed Mark would have the stamina he did. Especially with being on the bigger side than most, he’d manhandle you with ease. Yeah you were gonna keep this going for as long as you possibly could. “If you keep doing that I’ll cum again… I-I can’t anymore.” You were practically shaking,overstimulated,and a sobbing mess as mark ate you out. He was too pussy drunk to care about your pleads to stop, taking in your sweet taste as if it was his last. His fingers quickly replaced his tongue as he looked up at you, smiling as how broken you looked. “Then cum baby, let loose for me.” Thats all you needed to hear for that band to snap, letting out the most erotic moan either of you have ever heard.

You both lied there holding one another as you tried to recover, shaking a little every now and then which definitely earned a small chuckle from Mark. “Dude I’ve never heard you moan like that before, it was pretty hot honestly.” You looked up at him with a joking blank stare not wanting to give him any satisfaction. “I have no idea what you’re talking about. Plus I literally just stopped shaking, please give me like an hour before you get horny again.” You let out a small laugh and pat his chest before sitting up a bit and stretching. “I need to start getting ready for this event though. If I’m late there’s no doubt Chenle will kill me.” Standing up and tossing on whoever’s hoodie was at the edge of the bed, you noticed Mark staring at you blankly but not how you did earlier. This boy was truly perplexed.

“Where’s my treat?” “What treat?” Upon first glance you would’ve thought Mark just got told Justin Bieber quit music. He looked down heartbroken and couldn’t believe what he just heard. You like sweet treats and sharing them with people so you keep small bowls of different candies,chocolates, and other similar things in several areas of your home. Since Mark has been over so often, the bowl in your room had ran out and you never refilled it. After you both were done exploring each other you gave him one. Everytime. You basically trained and conditioned him. By accident at that. “Oh sweetie…thats-“ You couldn’t help but laugh and leave the room and come back with a melon candy. “Here you go baby.” Watching his face soften to a small pout was too cute for you to bear. “I thought I didn’t do a good job so you weren’t giving me a treat. Wait do you give other guys one too when they’re done if they do a good job? Did I do a good job? Wait are there othe-.”Before he could finish his list of questions you laughed and shook your head as you moved to sit across from him.

“You just fucked me, came in me, the ate me out until I came 3 times. I think you did more than a good job baby. And no there is no other guys, You have more than enough for me.” You watched as he listened and began to unwrap the candy. “Isn’t this like positive reinforcement like they use on dogs? oh my god you're treating me like a dog.””You know I do question what goes on in your head sometimes. No I’m not treating you like a dog, I just like sharing sweet treats with you.” You looked over at the bowl on your dresser and nodded towards it. “You finished that in a month. You’re here very often.” Mark looked over at the bowl and grew shy, he really was over often but he truly loves being in your presence. He does like you after all but you don’t need to know that right now. His eyes flickered down to your lips, suddenly growing a strong urge to kiss you.

“Let me share my sweet treat then.���

©️slyblonder

(Helloo thank you so much for reading please feel free to like a reblog pleasee I hope you enjoyed it🤍😞 im currently writing this at 1:27am(i wish i was joking) also feel free to request or ask questions in the ask box🤍🤍)

[pastafossa]

Something really special and tear inducing happened with Pip today.

(TW for pet loss, not mine but someone else's)

So we were going into the vet for a quick shot he needed, and for a final check on the cut on his leg. So me and him got there pretty close to closing (final appointment of the day), around 3:45 when it closed at 4. And as I'm walking in, I pass a woman hurrying out. She's in tears, and my heart just breaks for her. She gives Pippin a quick, 'hi puppy' and shaky pet in passing.

But then we go through the door into the waiting room. And another woman is sitting there on the bench, cradling a small collar and just sobbing. Sure enough, the little candle is lit up on the counter for pet loss. And I'm not sure what to do - do I offer a hug? Tell her I'm sorry for her loss?

But Pippin decided he knew what to do.

I need you to understand Pip for a second. He has been with us for 3 weeks. The rescue/foster before us had him for 6. This dog is only 9 weeks removed from that horrible farm where he was beaten, neglected, and left outside by himself at all hours and seasons. He did not have love or training. So, he's learning. He still jumps a bit, paws at people. He walks ok on a leash, like he'll pull but not yank, and he's easily distracted. Easily excited by love or attention because he's not used to it. I do not think this dog has ever seen someone cry. He has not been trained to know what to do when someone is upset.

So there's Pip, seeing this distraught woman sobbing in front of him, with - as far as we know - no experience or context he could make a decision by.

In a heartbeat, I'm yanked across the room - something he does not do - so he can reach this woman. He abruptly slows for the final approach, tail gently wagging, and very softly nuzzles at her in a way I haven't seen him do before. And this poor woman reaches down, carefully cradles Pip's head, and whispers, "hi baby, soft boy. My boy was soft too."

And then she just... cries with him, her head on his.

I glance at the receptionist (who may have teared a little like I had) and I kinda tip my head towards them, a 'can I wait to check in?'. I get a nod, and a mouthed, 'we can wait.'

So I just sat down quietly next to her. Let her cry and pet him. He'd done his big lean on her legs with his head in her lap, carefully adjusting whenever she did. After about five minutes she told us - me and Pip - about her dog. 18 years old, one she'd had since he was a puppy. She showed Pip her dog's collar, and showed me pictures on her phone of this dog, a cute little white fluffball with a HUGE doggy grin. And she pets Pippin more, and asks about him - his name, how long we've had him, whether he can sit yet because her boy took a bit to learn. We talk about Pip's skinny head and I get a watery laugh out of her when I tell her I call him corndog brain since I'm pretty sure the only way a brain could fit in his long narrow head was if it was corndog-shaped and went down his snout. We're there for about fifteen minutes before a tech comes out with nose and paw prints and she stands up. Pippin stays right with her, leaning calmly against her side as she takes the prints, her fingers buried in all the fluff around his neck. She gets a hug from the tech, and then leans down to do the same to Pip. And before she goes (Pippin trying very much to follow), she looks at me and just quietly says, '...thank you for letting me borrow him. I needed that.'

I have no idea how Pippin knew what to do, or how he can be like this even after being treated the way he was. But I'm really glad he could help that woman.

[writerpey]

Omg wait, you have so many fandoms I love, ok, ok could you make like a list of characters from theses shows and what they’d be? Like regressed, caregiver, ect? (So I can send asks based on that) I’m so excited right now

Arcane, Detroit Become Human, Last airbender, Our flag means death, and Six of crows/shadow and bone

happy 2024! this has been in my inbox forever but looks super fun to do! here’s my take on what characters would be regressors/caregivers for arcane, dbh and atla. I totally wrote way more than I expected to but here u are! <3 I’ll do a separate post for ofmd and soc bc they have so many characters I have opinions on.

Agere Character Headcanons

(Arcane, D:BH, ATLA)

(jinx is me cooking up this thread)

Arcane

Vi: As much as she’d be a wonderful caregiver, she’s absolutely a regressor. Being small reminds her of days spent with her parents and Powder, family trips to the fish markets of the coast and sunny days building sand castles at the beach. She tends to be on the older side, a natural tendency from a life spent as the older sibling, taking care of Powder. Vi’s a very active and vivacious little, playing outdoors and hanging off Caitlyn’s shoulders. Loves physical touch, hugs and high fives are the way to go.

Caitlyn: Caregiver all the way! I think she loves kids in general, and despite her awkward nature and sheltered upbringing, she finds it easy to take charge and step into the role of a protector. Definitely looks after Vi and is oftentimes too concerned about her safety. She loves taking the little out to the playground and to eat at Jericho’s food stall (even if she still refuses to eat a bowl of slop herself).

Jinx: Tiniest, cutest, moodiest little troublemaker there is. Jinx regresses to about four or five years old, and absolutely bounces off the walls at all hours of the day. She’s not the quiet, sweet child she once was as Powder, but rather gets herself into trouble and feigns innocence. She loves to annoy both Silco and Sevika, clambering on the latter’s lap and hiding under Silco’s desk for games of hide and seek. Her mood changes rather drastically as well, as she can go from completely happy to hyperventilating sobbing from anything as simple as scraping a knee to refusing bedtime.

Jayce: He’s a very attentive and high strung caregiver. Looking after Viktor is much easier than Caitlyn, Silco, or Sevika’s jobs, but Jayce always fusses over the little. He’s quick to scoop him up whenever it’s deemed necessary, and goes to Mel for help when he needs another pair of hands. Jayce loves caregiving because it gives him something to focus on other than his responsibility to Piltover, and enjoys simple play with his little like story time and building blocks.

Viktor: Super small and quiet regressor! Viktor can get very young, and has no qualms with depending on Jayce for help when he’s little. He likes to be snuggled up on a couch in a mound of blankets and is also content to sit and watch Mel paint the ships that go by the balcony of her apartment. Viktor is sweet and shy and doesn’t tend to verbalize his needs, but because Jayce is so attentive they mesh well together.

Detroit: Become Human

Kara: Caregiver. Need I expand? It’s in her coding in the first place to protect and nurture. Upon her deviance, Kara realizes that even if she was made for it, she can still reclaim that part of herself for herself. She is quick to console whomever her little may be, and projects the kindest and warmest energy to the person she’s taking care of. Kara enjoys making up her own stories, and loves playing make believe with her regressor.

Connor: One hundred percent a regressor. This little guy was shy and uncertain when he first started regressing, as he didn’t know what ‘normal’ behaviour from a deviant was, let alone how to process all the new emotions he was feeling. Connor loves to spend time at Hank’s house with Sumo, revelling in the feeling of the dog’s fluffy fur and laughing happily when he teaches Sumo all sorts of tricks. Connor is usually happy when regressed, but struggles with anxiety and asking for help. Hank is always there to walk Connor through his big feelings and encourages him to use his words.

Markus: He’s one of the most chaotic caregivers there is. You picked the pacifist route in the game? Doesn’t matter. This guy is unhinged when it comes to caregiving. Spoiling his little at any time possible, letting them stay up hours past their bedtime, giving them candy for breakfast and encouraging colouring on the walls. He spent so many years being exactly who Carl wanted him to be while also tasting freedom through Carl’s art that it brings him so much joy to see a regressor’s eyes sparkle when he says yes to whatever their heart desires. He’s also amazing at comforting a regressor. Big hugs and gentle eyes!

Avatar: The Last Airbender

Katara: Is a caregiver! Incredibly kind yet less patient than one (Sokka) might hope. Katara is quick to caution her little, always on the lookout for anything that they might hurt themselves with or on. But this doesn’t mean she hates fun! She adores the beach and using her bending to splash around, and is always ready to get her little an extra blanket or any snacks they ask for. She’s super sweet and falls into the role of a caregiver like she was made for it. Katara has even sewed a plushie or two as gifts, and has a knack for settling a regressor in front of a crackling fire and braiding their hair before bedtime.

Sokka: Regressor for sure. Even though he’s a big brother he never let go of his goofy side, and it plays into so much of his behaviour when he’s regressed. He’s on the older side, around 6-8, and has so much energy he doesn’t know where to put it all. Queue him running around for hours, laughing at absolutely anything that Aang says and bothering Toph just so she’ll play with him. Sokka doesn’t cry, even when he takes a tumble (which is quite often) but is fussy when he doesn’t get his way. He’s a troublemaker, but his beaming smile lets him get away with plenty.

Aang: Honestly I think he’s a caregiver, but is more like a fun uncle than any other label. His sage airbender wisdom doesn’t come through often, which means he’s all about fun all the time. His childish side matches a little like Sokka’s constant energy, and he seems to vanish into a cloud of smoke when any tears come his way. And how did Sokka and Zuko get chocolate all around their mouths, you ask? Well, there’s no one to ask because Aang’s just taken off on his glider on some very important business.

Zuko: LITTLE! REGRESSOR! TINY! Oh my goodness, he’s the first fictional character that I ever headcanoned as a regressor. There’s no need to delve into his trauma here, but the boy is in such a desperate need of healing his childhood that he regressed long before he even knew what it was. Regresses very young, between 2-5. Before meeting the Gaang he’d hang off of Uncle’s shoulder during Pai Sho tournaments on his ship and would shyly ask the crew members to play songs during music nights. His tough demeanour disappears completely when he’s regressed and he turns into a shy boy that is insistent on doing things himself and is quick to cry when he’s unable to, for example, wrap his robes the way he wants. Zuko has a turtleduck plushie that Katara sewed for him after Aang asked him what his favourite animal was and Sokka caught him cuddling up to Appa at night. Sweetest boy in the whole world.

Toph : Caregiver! Matches more with Aang’s style of caregiving than Katara’s, but still lands somewhere in the middle. Her earthbending gives her the ability to pick up on every tiny emotion that a regressor feels, and it means she’s prepared and in tune with every need, happy or unhappy, that someone needs. She tends to playfully tease Zuko and Sokka, but knows exactly where to draw the line with either boy based on the rhythm of their heart. Toph helps Aang when it comes to letting the boys do something Katara has specifically told them they’re not allowed to, and will always feign innocence when confronted by the eldest caregiver.

[ghoststyles]

Fairway to Heaven - Part 6

WC: 8.8K

Part 1| Part 2 | Part 3 | Part 4

_________________________________________________________________

Instead of hurt, betrayal or disgust, Briar feels heartbroken. Heartbroken Harry had to endure that. She moves closer, embracing him in a hug.

“I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” he violently cries into her shoulder. She rubs circles on his back, letting him get out his upset and frustration. 

“You didn’t deserve that. At all,” Briar says softly. Harry nods, just thankful she’s not upset at him. It took him years of therapy to be able to openly speak about his situation. 

“Do you know his name?”

“Oliver,” Harry rasps. 

“That’s beautiful. I bet he looks so much like you. I bet he has your kind eyes. Your charm. Your ability to make anyone feel special. I bet he’s clumsy like you. And I bet he’d like to meet you, too,” Briar says slowly. 

Harry cries harder, the sobs wracking his body.

They sit there for over an hour before Harry finally calms down. He musters up the courage to look at her. His eyes are so puffy and red, and snot is dripping from his nose.

“I understand if you’re upset with me, and if you never want to see me again,” he sighs in defeat. 

“Harry, look at me,” Briar grabs his face and runs her thumb along his cheek. “I’m absolutely not mad. I wouldn’t wish this situation on anyone. I want to help you deal with this, whatever way you need to.”

“Thank you,” he whispers. “I think I want to sleep for a while.” 

“Of course, let’s go up.”

~

“Harry, baby. Wake up,” Briar whispers, gently waking Harry from his sleep. It’s well past 11AM. She called Niall to let him know Harry isn’t feeling well. 

Harry stirs, the memories of last night flooding his mind. He’s not even sure if he slept. Briar runs her finger nails along his back, gently soothing him.

“I called us both out of work today, so we’re going to spend it how you want to.”

Harry exhales. He can’t even think of the last time he took a day off. Or the last time he had a panic attack. The two probably coincide.

When Camille left him, he buried himself in work. He quickly rose to the top as an associate, eventually becoming a manager. Now that his predecessors are retiring, Harry sometimes works from 6AM until 8PM. Even on Christmas Day. 

He takes some labored deep breaths.

“Can we go get breakfast?” 

Briar scrunches her eyebrows, not expecting his answer.

“Of course. Take your time getting dressed.” 

Briar leaves the room, already having been up and dressed for hours. She tossed and turned wondering how anyone could treat him that way. Harry loves so strongly and so deeply. She already knows he’d be an incredible father, based on his love for Gus. But, she didn’t know him in his 20’s and 30’s. Maybe he wasn’t as mature as he his now.

Her heart broke again watching him sleep. He looked sad, even when unconscious.

Harry eventually comes downstairs, slowly and solemnly. He pets Gus, reveling in his fluff. He is truly their emotional support dog.

“C-can we go to this place to get a full English? You’ve had it before, right?”

“Yes, when I went to London in high school. Will you eat my beans?”

Harry laughs softly, “Yes, I’ll eat your beans.”

She guides him out to her car, knowing he’s probably not in a state to drive. She’s too nervous to drive his nice car. It’s a beautiful day, so she took the top of her jeep off. She can’t wait to see his hair flying in the wind.

They pull up to his requested breakfast spot. The parking lot is a little deserted. She is relieved, because if he needs to cry a little he can do so without judgement.

The waitress greets them with a chipper tone, but quickly adjusts based on their sad demeanor. Briar orders them both a coffee and full English breakfasts. 

They sit in silence for a while.

“I know I don’t know her, but, should you call your mom? Is this something you’d talk to her about?” 

“I did in the beginning; my sister, too. But then it just became a cycle of discussing the same thing over and over. So I just stopped bringing it up.”

Briar nods, knowing the feeling. After her dad died, she was enrolled in therapy. As a 6 year old, she didn’t have much else to talk about. 

“I saw a therapist for a while. I was a little unwilling to talk about any of my other issues, so after a while they just gave me a prescription and sent me on my way. I felt like I got kicked out.” 

Briar grabs his hand across the table, squeezing it. “That’s the tough part of it; they give you the tools and you’re supposed to just figure out how to use them. There were so many times I just wished my therapist had told me what to do and what to say.”

Harry hums. The food arrives a few minutes later. He gently breaks his egg yolk, “I’d really like you to meet my mum and sister.”

She smiles, “Aw, yes, I’d love to. It didn’t even cross my mind since you met mine so early on. Well, not my mom, I guess.”

“When was the last time you saw her?” He asks, happy to move onto a different topic.

Briar blows air out of her mouth as she tries to recall the last time she saw her mother. 

“Christmas, I guess.” 

“Can I meet her? Or do you just want to wait until it happens organically?” 

“No, no. I should call her soon, anyway. I’ll try and set something up,” Briar says, pushing her food around. She supposes they're both facing their demons head-on today. “Do you mind if my brothers come? They usually need to be coerced into seeing her.”

“Of course not. Whatever is most comfortable for you guys.” 

They eat in silence, only speaking up when the waitress returns to the table every so often.

“I send him birthday cards,” Harry says, staring at his hands.

Briar lifts her head, giving him a look to continue his thought.

“Every year around Christmas time. I’m not even really sure when his birthday is. I’ve never written a note, or anything. I just sign my name ‘Harry’. For all I know, she’s never even told him about me. Or even given him the cards.”

Briar’s sadness returns, evident in her facial expression. 

“H-have you tried contacting your mutual friend? The one that introduced you?”

“I did, years ago. Everything was kind of fresh at that point, and I definitely think he took sides. I’m pretty sure they’re together now. His parents own an art gallery and are involved in high-society over there,” he coughs. “I just look  like a schmuck in comparison. The craziest part of it all, I don’t know what I did to deserve no contact. I’m scared I’ll die never knowing.” 

Briar closes her eyes, willing herself not to cry, “Did you ever fly to France to try and find her? Or her family?” 

“I did. Once. I’d say about 6 months later. I drank whiskey the entire flight to Paris. I didn’t even have any luggage with me. I just marched off the plane and went to where I last knew she lived. I should’ve known her keeping her Paris apartment meant something.” 

“You couldn’t have known,” Briar says softly. 

“I knocked on the door. She opened it so quickly. I think she was expecting someone else. Her jaw dropped, and she tried to close the door on me. I was able to get inside, but she started throwing bottles at me. Then she threatened to get a restraining order against me. She was really showing at that point, so I didn’t want it the police to get involved.” 

Briar is horrified the more he tells her. 

“I went home to my mum’s for a while. Then flew back to the US and just went back to work. I can’t say I’ve done anything substantial since then.” 

“Oh, stop. You renovated a gorgeous house. You started going back to Wynnewood. You’ve become your own boss,” Briar rattles off his accomplishments.

“I just thought I’d be married by now,” Harry chokes up a bit. She moves to his side of the table, leaning her head on his shoulder. 

“I know this is ironic coming from a 23 year old; but, there’s no timeline on life, baby. You faced adversity and are moving on from it. That takes a lot of courage.” 

Harry chuckles, wiping away a stray tear. Briar is so emotionally intelligent for a 23 year old. 

They leave the café, opting to go back to Harry’s house. They grab books from his shelf and read them outside on his comfy lounge chair under the cabana, hoping the sunshine heals them both. Harry eventually dozes off, finally achieving deep sleep after a rocky 24 hours. 

Briar massages his head, twirling his curls in between her fingers. As much as she wants to comfort him, she can’t help her tendencies to meddle. 

She visits Niall’s Instagram, immediately checking his following list. She scrolls, closely examining every profile to find even a tiny breadcrumb that could lead her to Camille. Harry never said her last name, so she’ll have to pull out the big guns of internet stalking.

Nothing stands out tremendously; He doesn’t follow many people. Just a few OnlyFans models, golf companies and Barstool Sports. She spots a familiar name, Lydia…Where does she know that name from?

Briar’s thumb gives one last ditch effort scroll, when she lands on an account: @Fingermonkey

She clicks on it, and her heart immediately stops. Camille. The woman who made her boyfriend lose sight of who he was. The account is public, so she cautiously proceeds. 

She’s a striking woman; she can see why Harry fell for her. She exudes beauty and class. It’s almost palpable.

Briar shudders, unsure if she should continue. She’s on her page for selfish reasons; to see Harry’s son. Her curiosity gets the best of her. She scrolls some more, before stopping at a photo of a tiny hand. Briar bites her lip, staring back down at Harry.

“No going back,” she whispers to herself.

After another few scrolls, she finds what she’s looking for. It’s from around 5 years ago. Camille is holding a tiny boy with dark brown curls and green eyes, bright as day. They’re on the swings, bright smiles adorning their faces. 

Briar feels like she’s been sucker punched in the stomach. He’s a beautiful little boy. A boy Harry never even got the chance to love and help raise. She takes several deep breaths and scrolls back even further to 8 years prior. 

Another blow. The engagement photos.

Briar winces, zooming in. They seem to be taken in California, just as the sun is setting. Camille is holding Harry’s face as she kisses him, the ring being the main focal point. She reads the caption:

J'ai trouvé mon éternité.

I found my forever.

She clicks off Camille’s page, rolling her eyes. She clears the search history, knowing she’s been caught stalking in the past.

Briar has so many questions. 

Does she want Harry to find her? Why is Niall still following her? 

~

Briar is physically at Wynnewood, but mentally elsewhere. After her stalking session, Harry woke up feeling better, so they decided she should go home. As much as he loves her company, he always needs alone time to process things. She was happy to oblige, needing her own time to breathe.

Briar is taking inventory after her shift when she spots Niall on the practice green. A lump forms in her throat, but she knows she needs to confide in him. He smiles, waving her over. 

“Hey, Briar. I heard about the other day. I was up in the clubhouse already when everything went down. How’re you doing?” He asks, pulling her in for a hug.

“I’m good, thanks for asking. Everything was taken care of, so I just needed some time to shake it off.” 

He nods, fiddling with his putter. Niall looks around, not really sure what else to say.

“Hey, Niall, can I ask you something?”

His eyes go wide, clearing his throat, “Listen, if it’s about Lydia and I…”

Finally, it clicks. Lydia from the party. Lydia who told her she’s also dating someone from the club. Briar gasps, “I, uh, what?” 

“Fuck.”

Briar crosses her arms in front of herself, “Um, I was just going to tell you that Harry told me about Camille, and about the baby.”

“Fuuuuck,” Niall scratches the back of his head. “Can you ignore what I said before?”

Briar laughs, “For now. We can talk about that later. I just wanted to see if you had other insight. It was obviously a very emotionally charged conversation.”

“Yeah. Are you off now? Do you want to go inside for a drink?”

She nods and waits for him to clean up his stuff. They walk back to the clubhouse in silence, so Briar grabs a table outside while Niall changes in the locker room. The club is empty enough, so she’s not worried about members seeing them together.

He sits down, sighing, “I-I don’t really know how to proceed. Do you just want to tell me what he’s told you?”

“Sure,” she says quietly. Briar begins filling him in about their dinner at Ashmont and Jonathan revealing more than Harry was willing to share. Her heart races as she shares more details.

“That’s tough, darling. I know he was going to tell you eventually. The situation absolutely wrecked him. It took years to feel like I had my friend back.” 

She nods, biting her lip, staring down at her shoes. Harry bought her a pair of lavender and white New Balances; her initials stitched in the tongue. 

“You’re a very rational person, even at your age,” he smiles, leaning to put his elbows on his knees. “So, I know you’ll both work through it. But, what are your feelings?”

Briar sucks in a breath. “I’m not angry, and I want to support him, of course. But, I can’t help but have this sinking feeling in my stomach. I did some Instagram stalking.”

“You found Camille on there?”

“Yeah, through your account,” she waits for Niall to look back up at her.

He meets her eyes, “I keep a distance. I don’t speak to her or our mutual friends from study abroad. But I like to keep tabs. He’s my mate and I want to protect him.” 

Briar nods, picking the skin at her cuticles. 

“He’s a cute kid, isn’t he?” Niall smiles. 

“Yeah, he is. Harry didn’t deserve that. At all,” she says, sitting back in her seat. “Should I meddle? Or just stay out of it?”

“I would hate to see this kid get any older without meeting his father. And, if you think you’ll be,” he trails off, smiling to himself. “Sticking around for a while, I think you have the influence on him to face it head on.”

“I hope I’ll be sticking around for a while,” she smiles.

~

Briar feels slightly better after talking to Niall. She has to remember to ask Harry if he knew about Lydia. 

Briar was in need of some cathartic release. If Harry was willing to face this obstacle, she’s willing to face hers. She sits in the driver’s seat of her Jeep and scrolls her list of contacts before landing on Catherine Barlowe. 

She dials, going through several cycles before finally being answered on the final ring. 

“Hi, Bri. How are you, sweetheart?”

“Hi, Mom. I’m good, how are you?”

“I’m so good, honey. I’m so happy to hear from you. Dean and I are actually getting ready to move in a few weeks.”

“Oh? Where are you going?” Briar scrunches her eyebrows. That means her mom is selling the house she bought with her dad. The house she lived her first 9 years in before her mother’s addiction led to the 5 of them being placed with her aunt and uncle. 

“I thought your brother may have told you. We’re going to California, honey.”

“Who? I thought the last time we all saw you was at Christmas time? And why California?” 

“Jasper. He comes to see me. A lot more recently. The other boys only contact me when you do. I don’t think I’ll ever hear from Welles on his own,” Catherine sighs. “Dean is from California. He has young daughters, so we’re moving there to be closer to them. You remember? I told you about them.”

Tears begin welling in Briar’s eyes. Her mother, now 4 years sober and remarried gets to go play house with Dean’s young children. Instead of tending to her own.

“Yeah, I remember. There’s three of them, right? But they weren’t at the wedding,” Briar says quietly, remembering the rushed ceremony that took place the week after they finished their program together. Welles was furious, Jasper and Callum didn’t say a word, and Cormac cried the entire time. Patrick couldn’t bear to go. Meredith went in support of the siblings. 

“Yes, he didn’t have custody rights at the time. But, that’s all settled now. We’re so happy, Bri.”

“I’m glad, Mom. Listen, I have to go, but I wanted to see if you’d be interested in going out to lunch soon. I’d like you to meet my boyfriend,” she rasps out.

“That sounds great, honey. Just text me the details. Talk soon.”

“Bye,” Briar chokes, throwing her phone into the passenger seat. She takes a few deep breaths to regulate her breathing. The tears continue to fall as she pulls out of the parking lot of Wynnewood. 

Her phone begins to buzz, seeing Harry’s contact photo pop up.

“Hi,” she says solemnly before placing the phone between her shoulder and ear. 

“Hi, Birdie. Are you okay?” He asks, sensing her tone.

“Yeah, yep, I’m good. What’s up?”

“Nothing, I figured you’re leaving Wynnewood. Was gonna see if you want to grab Gus and come over. I can make us dinner.”

“Um, I’m kind of tired. Think I’m just gonna go home, if that’s alright.”

“No, yeah, of course, love. Are you sure you’re alright?”

“Yes, I promise. I’ll text you when I get home, okay?”

“Okay,” he says softly. “Bye.”

She hangs up, not even bothering to say bye. Briar knows she shouldn’t take it out on Harry, but she’s struggling to hold herself together. She hears a crack of thunder before feeling thick rain drops hit her face.

“Fuck!” 

Briar never put her Wrangler’s roof back on the other day. The droplets get more intense as she nears her apartment. Pulling into her spot, she frantically runs to her storage area to grab her roof parts. 

It’s down pouring now, but she charges forward with her parts, lining them against the car. Her biceps are burning trying to lift the piece on top of the car. Tears are starting to roll down her face, her hair beginning to stick to her neck.

Briar squeezes her eyes closed, defeated as she feels two arms wrap around her. She whips her head around, startled by her boyfriend. 

“What’s going on, love? Let me help,” Harry says, pulling her down from the step of her Jeep. She steps to the side under her apartment’s overhang, watching him effortlessly put the roof of her Jeep back together. He’s absolutely soaked, his gray sweatpants now a charcoal color. She watches the way his back muscles move under his white t-shirt. 

He fastens the parts from the inside of the car before grabbing her backpack in one hand, and her hand in the other. He guides her to her apartment while fumbling with her keys. Gus greets them at the door, unsure who to go to first. 

Harry sits Briar down on her ottoman before grabbing the fuzzy blanket from her sofa.

“What’s going on? I’m a little scared,” Harry says, his eyes full of concern. 

She takes a shaky breath before sobs take over her whole body. She folds in on herself, burrowing into the blanket.

“I-I’m so sorry. I’m so sorry,” she wails. Harry is stunned, unsure what she’s apologizing for.

“I should be supporting you and here I am getting so overwhelmed and then trying to deal with my own bullshit,” Briar cries. He places his hand gently on her back.

“Baby, I’m lost. Did something happen today?”

“I called my mom. She’s moving to California to raise her new husband’s kids,” Briar cries, snot pouring from her nose. “I should’ve fucking known. I don’t even know why I called.”

Harry can’t help but feel a little guilty. He mentioned it at their breakfast to get himself out of the hot seat. She took his bait. 

“And because I can’t stop meddling, I looked up Camille online,” she confesses. “I even talked to Niall about it all.” 

Harry freezes. He figured she would confide in Niall. But he didn’t think she’d look Camille up. He’s too afraid to ask what she found. 

Harry guides her to sit up. He grabs her cheeks with one hand and makes her face him, “Hey. Hey. I need you to breathe, Briar.”

Briar cries harder at his use of her name. She can feel herself start to hyperventilate. He wraps himself around her tight. He holds her until she stops shaking. Gus has brought them 5 of his toys to try and lighten the mood. 

“Gus, go to your bed,” Harry commands, voice deep. Briar flinches. 

She lifts her head, taking in a deep breath.

“I hurt my own feelings today. I went looking for information I shouldn’t’ve,” she admits quietly.

“I think we all do that sometimes. Which part do you want to talk about first?”

Briar loves how diplomatic Harry is. Even when they have their spats, he always makes her feel like an equal partner. She also loves when he completely dominates her in the bed right after.

“W-we can talk about my mom,” she says, assuming that’s the easier of the two. “Her husband has 3 young daughters. So, now my mom gets a do-over. Poof. Our family is just out of the picture.”

Harry sighs. His father did something similar after his parents divorced. It stung for years, and took time to mend. Now they’re very close. 

“That’s awful, Birdie. I’m so sorry. Are you going to see her before she leaves?”

She nods, wiping her nose on his chest, “Yeah, told her about you. Apparently my brother has been visiting her in secret. I’m so angry.”

He smiles lightly, “I’m happy to come along. Or not. Whichever makes you more comfortable. Don’t hold it against him. You all have to deal with things differently.”

“Thank you,” she says.

“Of course, baby. Now, do you want to tell me about the other situation?”

“Only if you want to. I crossed a line,” she starts to cry again.

She wraps her hand within his, squeezing tightly. Comfortable silence is usually never an issue for them, but the tension could be cut with a knife. 

“Well, social media is public information, baby. I could’ve done it years ago, but never did.”

“I saw him,” Briar blurts out. It was now or never.

Harry closes his eyes, feeling nauseous. He takes a deep breath through his nostrils, “Oh yeah?”

“Yeah. He’s gorgeous, Harry. Really,” she sniffles. “You shouldn’t give up. She’s wrong for what she did. And I want to help you fight for this.”

He can’t help but feel his heart swell with pride. His tough girl is ready to sit in the trenches with him. To fight the biggest demon holding him back from his happiness.

“I wrote a letter years ago,” Harry starts. “Let’s send it.”

Briar gasps, sitting up to face him, “I don’t want you to feel pressured by me.”

“I’m not. I’m not sure if this is too soon, but I already know I want to keep you around for a long, long time. This will help me get over my last hurdle.”

Briar cradles his face, kissing him gently.

“I’m yours, if you’ll have me.”

They huddle together.

Briar starts to snicker, “Did you have any idea that Niall and Lydia, the server from the club, are dating?”

Harry’s head shoots up, “Huh?” 

“Okay, good. I would’ve been pissed if you hid that from me."

“How’d you find out?”

Briar laughs, “I said, ‘Hey, Niall, can I ask you something?’ And he confessed immediately.” 

Harry throws his head back laughing.

~

Harry is in his study, silently reading his letter from years ago. His tears are falling onto the paper, dotting and blurring the ink. He was 32 when he wrote this. It sounds old, but he was a kid. It was hard to keep him at home. He had access to disposable income, so he used it to its fullest.

Camille lived a simple life, finding pleasure in gardening, reading and going to cafés. Her job always came first, which kept her busy traveling around the world. Harry was restless; always chasing the next big thing, and partying until his body physically shut down. 

It didn’t help that he was a touchy person. Even though Camille had his whole heart, he shamelessly flirted with other women. He let them hang on him at bars, on yachts, and anywhere he could get attention. People in their circle talk; leaving Harry in the hot seat more than once.

He’d be naïve to blame it on Camille’s attachment style. She was generally cold, not showing him much affection. But, nonetheless he pursued her, absolutely enamored by her beauty and grace. 

He was dumb enough to suggest an open relationship one time; about 6 years into the relationship. His needs in bed became too much for Camille. She didn’t understand his need to get off and dominate her. He slept at a hotel every night that week. She gave him an out, but he couldn’t take it. 

When Camille left, he started hooking up with women more regularly. His heart hurt so bad, but he was finally getting his physical needs met. None of them lasted, until Briar. 

Over the course of 8 years, his heart slowly healed. It’s not ideal that Briar is so much younger, and an employee of his country club. There’s a strange power dynamic there. He loved how flustered she got when he looked at her; she still does sometimes, but he can feel the difference. 

They bring encourage each other’s confidence. They drive each other to be a better version of themselves. They feed each other’s deepest desires; scratching every itch that had been culminating over several years. 

Harry begins rewriting the letter; changing the tone from blinding rage, to one of neutrality. He wishes her well. He hopes she’s healed.

From what? He’s not sure. He hopes she understands his point of view, and will consider letting Harry meet his child. He’d do anything at this point. 

He seals up the letter, addressing it to Camille. Not even sure she still lives at this address, he walks it out to his mailbox anyway, lifting the red flag to signal the post man. 

He feels weight lift from his chest that had been there since the day he met Camille.

~

Briar and Harry are sitting at a nice restaurant on the water. She sips gingerly at her mojito while they wait for her mother to arrive. Briar extended the invite to her brothers, but received radio silence from them all. 

She’s anxiously bouncing her leg, to which Harry firmly grasps her thigh as he locks his jaw. She inhales sharply, closing her eyes. After the emotional turmoil they’ve experienced over the last few weeks, their sex life has toned down immensely. She misses his hand around her neck and his dirty whispers. 

“Relax. I’m right here,” Harry whispers in her ear lowly.

Briar gasps when three of her brothers appear from the restaurant’s entryway. Jasper must’ve picked up Callum and Cormac from Patrick’s.

Briar stands to hug her older brothers, while Harry pulls Cormac in for a hug.

“Where’s Welles?”

“Not sure. I haven’t heard from him,” Callum says simply. 

She rolls her eyes. He’s 28, but he is the most immature out of all of them. 

They sit, easing into a conversation with Harry. She’s grateful she can entertain them while she’s somewhere else in her head. He reaches over to lock pinkies. 

Her mother walks in, looking stunning. That’s one thing that Briar has always been jealous of. It’s why her addiction flew under the radar for so long. She was always put together and exuding happiness. But in secret, she was struggling. 

Her strawberry blonde hair is longer than when she saw her last, loose waves falling over her shoulders. She’s in a floor length floral gown, a sweater over her shoulders to fight the chill of the restaurant. 

She spots them after speaking with the hostess, her smile lighting up the room. 

“Hi, my babies!”

Jasper stands to greet her, while her other brothers hold in a groan. She walks around the circular table to press a kiss to Briar’s head, before turning her attention to Harry.

“And who’s this? Don’t think I popped him out,” she laughs, waiting for Harry to stand up.

“Mom, seriously?” Briar grimaces. 

“Hi, I’m Harry. It’s a pleasure to finally meet you,” Harry says smiling, pulling out the chair for her. 

“Pleasure is all mine, Harry. I’m Catherine. Isn’t my daughter incredible?”

Harry smiles, nodding. He can sense Briar’s discomfort. He assumes this praise is just for show. 

Her mother brings up every topic under the sun, effectively avoiding topics regarding Briar’s father, the move, and her new husband.

They eat, letting Cormac talk about school, Callum talk about grad school and his new girlfriend, and Jasper about his new job. Briar realizes she’s done a shit job at talking to her brothers lately. She doesn’t know any of this.

“Where’s Wellie, Briar? Didn’t you invite him?”

“I did. Didn’t hear from him.”

“It would’ve been nice for you to follow up with him,” Catherine snipes. “It’s not everyday I get to see all five of you.”

“Really? How about you? When was the last time you talked to him?” Briar crosses her arms at her mother.

“It doesn’t matter. This is family time,” Catherine raises her eyebrows, waiting for Briar to snap.

“You know all about that, don’t you mom? Just counting down the minutes until you can go play house with Dean’s kids in California.”

Callum and Cormac look between the two women, stunned. Jasper’s eyes widen.

“California?” Callum questions. “Mom, what is she talking about?”

Catherine looks around, “I thought Jasper would’ve filled you all in. I’m moving to California with Dean to be closer to his kids. They’re younger.”

Jasper looks down, pushing the vegetables around on his plate. Callum shakes his head, throwing his napkin on the table before storming off. Cormac starts to cry, to which Harry puts a hand on his back. 

“Mom, how can you leave?” Cormac asks, his lip quivering. 

“Baby, you’re all adults. You don’t need me anymore.”

“I’m only 17, Mom,” Cormac chokes. 

Briar has tears streaking down her face. Briar hasn’t needed her mother since she was 12 years old, hoping and praying for her to come back. Cormac barely knew her; only fantasizing what their relationship could’ve been. 

Harry pays the bill before suggesting Catherine leaves. She nods, standing to grab her purse. She silently looks each of her children in the eye before walking out of the restaurant. 

“I’m sorry, Bri. I thought she changed,” Jasper says solemnly. 

“It’s okay. You deserve to handle your relationship with her however you want.”

Harry and Briar walk out hand in hand after spending 20 minutes consoling her brothers. 

They climb into Harry’s car, silently staring ahead. Harry grabs her hand again.

“That was rough, pup. I’m sorry,” Harry says softly.

“Can we just go home? I miss you, Daddy.”

Harry clears his throat as his cock twitches.

“You have me, Birdie. Let’s go home.”

~

“Be rough with me,” Briar pleads from the bed. “I want it so bad.”

Harry chuckles as he pulls his belt from the loops on his pants. She’s completely bare, her wrists fastened to each corner of the bed. He opts to leave her feet out of the restraints, hoping he can toss her around a bit. 

“Daddy’s been taking it easy on his Birdie for the last couple weeks,” Harry says, trailing his knuckle along her rib cage. She keens, shivering from the light touch. “But don’t think I forgot about your stunt at Ashmont.”

Briar freezes, remembering their escapades. She taunted him, removing her panties in the stall, waiting for him to come after her. It’s a shame the night turned into a disaster soon after. She whines, not sure what else to do.

“Hm? Remember that, Birdie? Words,” he stares straight into her eyes.

“Yes, Daddy. I was naughty,” she bites her lip. 

He doesn’t like that. He shoves his middle and ring fingers into her mouth, choking her a little. “Leave that lip alone. I bite that.”

She purrs around his digits, goosebumps rising on her skin. He removes them from her mouth before sticking them at her core. He barely grazes her folds, seeing how she’ll react. She jerks around, slightly moving her pelvis to meet his hand. 

“Ah, ah. No. You’ll be taken care of how I decide.” 

She nods, swallowing thickly. She’s eating up everything he throws at her.

“Think I’m gonna take my time tonight,” Harry let’s out an exaggerated sigh. Briar whines, pushing her face into her shoulder. “Mm-mm. None of that.” 

Harry pushes Briar’s legs in the air, holding her ankles together, so the lips of her vagina are peaking out between her thighs. He growls at the sight.

“This little pussy is so used to getting what she wants. What does she want tonight, Birdie?”

“Your mouth, Daddy! Please!” Briar balls her fists, wiggling slightly.

Harry spits, watching the liquid drip down her thighs and cunt, “Nah, I’m good.”

Briar’s jaw locks in frustration. She watches as he walks to his closet grabbing her plug and vibrator. He generously applies lube to the plug, gently circling her ass. Briar closes her eyes, laying her head back. 

He gently pushes the plug in past the tight muscle, moving it in and out a little. 

“Oh my godddd,” Briar exhales. Her chest is rising and dropping fast. 

“I think tonight’s the night, baby.”

Briar whines, half out of horniness and the other out of nervousness. He flicks the vibrator on, pressing it firmly on her clit. She throws her head to the side. 

“Look at me. Don’t look over there,” Harry threatens, increasing the speed. 

She wills her eyes open, staring into his, her mouth opening slightly. The tension is building in her pelvis. She’s sure to come once he starts circling the vibrator on her clit; his signature move. Within seconds of him doing that, she’s crumbling. 

Harry shuts off the vibrator and adjusts her leg position so her legs are open wide, one resting on his shoulder.

“Wanna see your pretty face when I fuck your ass,” He says, peppering kisses on her face and neck.

“Please,” Briar whispers. 

Harry reaches between them and pulls the plug out and tosses it on the floor. He’ll clean it later. He extends his hand to rest in front of her face. 

“Spit.”

She spits on his fingertips, a line of spit connecting them to her lips. He lowers his hand to lightly touch her hole before inserting his middle finger. Briar groans, pulling on her restraints. He quickly inserts another, rocking them in and out of her gently. 

Harry’s cock is neglected, standing tall and proud, nearly touching the tip to his torso. Briar begins to panic, unsure if his girth will fit in there.

“Relax, baby. I got you. Do you remember your word?” He says, petting her cheek.

“Bogey,” she says softly. 

“Good girl,” he kisses her again. Harry has never withheld kisses, even in her worst punishments. “One more and then we’ll go for it, okay?”

“Mhm,” she nods, a single tear escaping her eye. She trusts her boyfriend with her entire being, but her heart rate is skyrocketing. 

The third digit enters her, eliciting a whine. Harry flexes his fingers, giving her a delicious stretch. A thick layer of sweat has formed behind her knees and on her forehead. 

Harry kisses her forehead, licking the saltiness from his lips, “All good, Birdie. Doing so well for me.”

After a few more minutes of stretching her out, Harry pulls his fingers out and lowers himself to be eye level with her ass. He licks a long stripe over the now open hole. Briar shivers, pulling on the restraints.

Harry rises from his spot on the bed to pull his underwear all the way off, his cock bobbing as he moves. He grips his length firmly, giving himself a few generous pumps. He kneels over her, undoing her right hand’s restraint. She looks at him curiously, but understands when he entwines their hands. 

He uses his right hand to line himself up at her delicate center. Briar sucks in a breath in anticipation. Harry presses the bulbous head of his dick in, groaning as he moves. His pace is painstaking, taking in every facial expression from the angel below him. 

“Such a good girl. Letting Daddy be the only one to fuck this little hole,” he pants, nostrils flaring. His forehead is starting to drip with sweat.

“Only you,” she whines as he pushes in little by little.

“Let me know if you need me to stop and take a break, lovie.”

She furiously shakes her head, still holding in a breath. Harry is finally working his way up to full thrusts.

“Breathe with me,” Harry pleads. “1,2,3, exhale.”

Briar feels high. That breath sent her senses all the way to her pussy.

“Daddy,” Briar breathes heavily. 

“What do you need, baby?”

“Fingers. I-In my pussy,” she cries. “Please.” 

“Okay, baby. I know y’empty in there,” he smiles down at her lovingly as he untangles their fingers so he can stick them inside. “So wet f’me.”

The sensations are too much once he starts petting her g-spot with his fingers.

“Coming, Daddy,” she babbles.

“Go ahead, Birdie. So fucking proud of you.”

She squeezes her eyes closed, letting out a cry of relief as she hits her wall. 

Harry chuckles at her babbling. She is fucked out to high heaven. He wants one more out of her before he comes. He alternates thrusting into her ass and fingering her pussy. He releases her other hand from the restraint. She’s too distracted, so her hand remains in the same spot.

“Rub your little clit, baby. One more f’me.”

“Ugggghnnnn,” Briar whines, drool coming out of her mouth. She circles her clit three more times before she’s clenching hard on his fingers and cock.

The squeeze of her ass pushes Harry into his own orgasm, a ringing forming in his ear. He gives two last lazy thrusts, emptying himself into her. He closes his eyes and hangs his head low before slowly pulling out.

Briar squawks, so he shushes her gently. Harry could come again at the sight in front of him. His come is leaking out of her ass hole, dripping onto the sheets below. He picks some up with his finger, smearing it on her pussy. She mewls, her head lolling to the side. 

“So fucking good for me. Gorgeous, baby.”

Harry takes a mental image before hustling to the bathroom. He starts the bath, making sure to throw some epsom salt and lavender oil in there. He wets a towel with warm water for Briar, and throws two towels into his towel warmer. 

He reenters the bedroom to find his girl curled up, her back to him. He runs his knuckles down her protruding spine. Harry gently dabs the towel along her labias and ass to clean up.

“Birdie, I ran us a bath. Gonna lift you,” Harry coos. Her eyelashes flutter as she looks up at him with moony eyes.

Harry lifts her from her armpits and knees, and swiftly carries her to the tub. Her eyes are shut, but she rests her head on his chest. He’s become a pro at maneuvering themselves into the tub.

Harry positions Briar at the front of the tub, before finding his seat at the back. He leans forward to pull her body to his chest. Harry closes his eyes and rolls his neck along the edge of the porcelain tub, listening to their uneven breaths.

He plays with Briar’s hair; twirling the long pieces between his fingers. She hasn’t said a word, but he knows she’s elsewhere right now. He moves his fingertips to her scalp, gently scratching around the nape of her neck, hoping she’ll come back to him soon.

“Mmmmm,” Briar hums, smiling to herself.

Harry smiles, increasing the pressure and speed like he’s petting Gus.

“Stop,” Briar whines, her hair now in her face.

“Sorry, Birdie. How do you feel?” 

“Good. Sleepy,” Briar yawns.

“Hungry? I can order us something,” Harry taps her sides.

“Can we have Caesar salads and Diet Cokes?” She cranes her neck to look back at him.

Harry laughs, “Sure, baby.”

“And french fries.”

“You got it,” Harry leans down and kisses her.

~

Briar is staying at Harry’s while he’s in the city for a few in-person meetings. It’s been nice; she does yoga outside in the mornings, takes Gus for walks around the picturesque neighborhood, and cooks using his expensive appliances.

🦊: Hi, Birdie.

🐥: Hi Daddy

🦊: Miss me yet? 

🐥: I like being able to lay sideways in your bed

🦊: You can do that when I’m there.

🐥: You’re too hard

🦊: How’d you know? Send me a picture.

🐥: It’s 10AM. Pay attention to your meeting

🦊: I’m not asking. 

Though Harry isn’t home, Briar still walks around his house scantily clad. An idea to terrorize her boyfriend pops into her head. Bolting up the stairs, Briar grabs her plug from Harry’s special area in his closet. She smirks to herself, feeling the cool metal in her hand. She walks outside, peering over Maureen’s fence to ensure no one will witness what she’s about to do.

She gathers spit in her mouth before lubricating the plug. She places one foot on the lounge chair for leverage, before nudging the plug past her entrance. Waddling around, she moves two lounge chairs to face one another. Propping her phone up on one, she shuffles to the other to get into position. She removes her sleep tank top and silk shorts, staring up into the sky to get some sun on her face.

She kneels, making sure to pop her ass out more. The phone is set to video so she can take screen shots of the poses she likes best. Or just send the whole damn video to him.

She makes sure to twist her body to fake some curves, looking over her shoulder and touching her hair. She fiddles with the plug, making her whine. 

Yup, she’s sending the video.

After a few minutes, she gets up from the lounge chair, being sure to flash the camera. She grabs the phone, scanning it over her body before blowing a kiss.

Delivered

Looking around again, she quickly throws her clothes back on, opting to leave the plug in for the day. Gus joins her outside, laying on the chair opposite hers. She has an urge to shut her phone off completely, just to push Harry’s buttons a little more.

Her quiet morning is interrupted by her ringtone blaring. She picks up without saying anything.

“Do you think you’re funny?”

“Who is this?” Briar is holding back laughter.

“I am in a meeting, little girl. You sent that video when all I told you to send was a photo.”

“So are you jerking yourself in the bathroom?”

“What a fucking mouth on you, huh? And yeah, your little video is causing a problem,” Harry grits.

Briar whines, “Don’t you wish it was my little hand, Daddy? Or my mouth?”

Harry slams his fist against the bathroom stall. His neck vein is protruding as he growls.

Briar is full on smiling to herself. She’s not particularly horny right now, but she’s happy to aid Harry with his issue. She can hear his panting increase before a clattering of the phone. 

“Harry?”

“Fuck, I dropped my phone,” he laughs incredulously.

“Oh my, well, maybe I should let you go,” Briar trails off.

“No, baby. Almost done. Just tell Daddy how much you love,” he groans. “Love him.”

“I love you, Daddy. So much. Come for me,” Briar says, leaning into her chair.

Harry releases into the toilet with a strangled moan. He prays to God the conference room walls are thick. He grabs a wad of toilet paper to wipe down his misfires before flushing.

“Thanks, Birdie. You’re in so much trouble when I’m home. Love you.”

“Okay, bye.”

She hangs up, shaking her head. She looks over her shoulder to see Maureen standing at the fence, watering her plants. Briar gives her a tight smile and wave, to which Maureen grimaces in response.

Briar lounges for a few hours before feeling intense boredom. She cleans a little bit, making sure to dust Harry’s various trinkets from his travels. She lightly wipes a ceramic elephant he got in Thailand, a Russian nesting doll from his time in St. Petersburg, and a clay shark from South Africa. While Harry has been all over the globe, the two share a desire to one day back back in South America. She hopes a llama trinket will one day sit on this shelf. 

It’s been a few weeks since the lunch with Briar’s mom and since Harry sent the letter to Camille. While she’s happy Harry is attempting to get to know his son, Briar can’t help but feel extreme anxiety. Why hasn’t Camille responded? 

The shrill sound of the doorbell and Gus’s subsequent bark breaks Briar’s train of thought. She can see a figure through the frosted glass of Harry’s front door, lingering at the table of snacks designated for delivery drivers. 

Briar can see the UPS logo on the man’s shirt, so she lets him pick his goodies before opening the door. She waved to him as he drives away, looking down at the package at her feet. She wonders if Harry sent her something for when he returns. 

Bending over, she’s surprised at the package’s weight. If it were new lingerie, it’d be light. She bends at the knees, inhaling when she lifts the package. Shooing Gus away, she manages to get the package to Harry’s long kitchen table. 

She’s wracking her brain what it could be. The entire package is wrapped in brown paper. She flips it over to see the label. Harry’s name written in cursive letters using a Sharpie. Her eyes are drawn to the left hand side; the sender.

C. Rowe 4 Rue Dupetit-Thouars Paris, France 75003

A lump forms in Briar’s throat. It’s been a few hours since she talked to Harry this morning. Her fingers start to dial his number.

“If you’re calling for a follow-up to this morning, I have to let you know that Niall is right next to me.”

She hears Niall groan in the background. When she doesn’t laugh or respond, Harry tries again. “Birdie?”

“Hi, I-I wanted to tell you that a package came f-for you,” Briar chokes out. 

Harry scrunches his eyebrows, “Okay, just leave it with the others. Anything else?”

He wants to be sweet with her, but she knows not to call about random things while he’s in meetings.

“I-it’s from Camille.”

Silence. Briar closes her eyes. 

Harry sighs, “I see. Okay, thanks for letting me know, pup. I’ll be home tomorrow afternoon. Are you going to be okay until then?”

“Y-yes, I’ll be fine. I’m sorry. I’m not sure why I’m so nervous.” 

“It’s okay. This whole thing is a little odd. Just try to take your mind off it. Throw it in my office if you don’t feel like seeing it.” 

“Okay, I will. I’ll talk to you later. Love you.”

“Love you.”

Harry sighs. Niall looks over at him empathetically. 

“So when were you gonna tell me you’re dating one of the servers?”

Niall’s eyes go wide before rubbing his temples, “She told you?”

“What? Why wouldn’t she? She’s my girlfriend.” 

“We’re not dating. We hooked up once...twice.”

“Mhm,” Harry laughs. “Better nip that in the bud, then.”

Niall groans again just as their next meeting begins.

~

The anticipation is killing Briar. Harry is due home any minute, so she’s pacing between his kitchen and living room. Sitting on the sofa, sitting on the stool, sitting on the chair, standing by the window. She can’t keep still.

She joins Gus in his outburst of barking and running from window to window when they hear Harry’s car pull into the garage. She pokes her head into the garage to see Harry unloading his bags from the back.

She walks over to him, pressing her hands into his chest. 

“Hi, Birdie. Missed you,” Harry says, pressing a kiss to her mouth.

“Welcome home,” she smiles back at him.

She grabs the wheeled suitcase, lifting it over the threshold of the door. 

“Let me change and we can open it,” Harry says simply. Briar’s stomach drops.

“Okay.”

Briar corrals Gus to the sofa, the two of them perching in the corner seat. Harry changed into colorful sweatpants and a t-shirt that says ‘vote vote vote’. He grabbed the package from his office on his way back into the main living room. 

He places the package on the coffee table. The two of them stare at it silently. 

“Are you sure you don’t want to do this alone?”

“Mm, no, it’s okay. If there’s a letter, then I’ll read that on my own.”

Briar nods, waiting for him to open the box.

Harry peels the brown paper from the edges, tearing straight through his and Camille’s names.

He removes the paper in its entirety, examining the oversized shoe box before pulling the lid off. He places it off to the side while peering at the contents. From first glance, it looks like junk. 

He scrunches his eyebrows when he spots one of his old shirts. Did Camille really use this as an opportunity to send his shit back?

He moves the shirt to reveal a few envelopes, a baby rattle, a small pair of vans, a stuffed dog, and drawings. 

Harry opens one of the envelopes to find a stack of Polaroid pictures. He can feel his eyes start to sting. They’re in chronological order, showing his son grow from a tiny baby to an excited 7 year old. Briar has her head on his shoulder, silently viewing the photos. The birth photo has words scribbled in Sharpie at the bottom.

Oliver Styles Rowe  18-11-2016 3.3kgs | 53 cm

Harry is crying now. Briar rubs his back, trying to encourage him to keep going. 

He flips through the photo, feeling vomit bubble up his throat. This kid looks like a lot of fun. Fun that’s killing him to not have been a part of. Camille keeps him well travelled; there are photos from Tokyo, Australia and Mexico. 

Unlike most babies, Harry’s had his signature curls from the start. Briar gasps at the photos as they get closer to present day. Oliver is Harry’s twin. 

Oliver receives great marks in school; he’s pictured with several certificates and trophies. He even seems to be a footballer. 

Harry puts the stack on the coffee table, turning to face Briar. 

“Wow,” Harry says, wiping a tear from his eye.

“What’re you thinking?” 

“Just heartbroken all over again.” 

~

Harry went into his office to read the letter. He stops at his bar cart to pour himself some tequila.

It’s short, but gives Harry some closure. Over the last 8 years, Camille embraced motherhood by focusing less on work. She meditates, volunteers regularly, and is extremely involved at school activities.

She and Theo, their mutual friend from study abroad, have been together since she moved back. That sends a pang to Harry’s heart. They got married about 5 years ago, and have a little girl named Amélie. She only talks a little about Oliver, saying how much he reminds her of Harry. 

Camille apologizes, which Harry didn’t expect. She recognizes cutting him off from his son was wrong. She also left her contact information, followed by the last line. 

He would love to meet you. I think it’s time. 

C

Tears are fully falling on Harry’s cheeks as the heaviness of the last 8 years hits him. His son has Styles in his name. He smiles to himself, feeling the butterflies in his stomach. 

He shoves the letter in his desk drawer before wiping his eyes. He joins Briar and Gus back in the living room cozied up by the fire.

____________________________________________________________________

OHM YGOD. SOMEONE PLZ TALK TO ME AB BIRDIE AND HARRY I AM LIVINGGGGG

Taglist:

@daphnesutton​ @pandeebearstyles​ @anxiouswaterss​ @gem1712 @stylesfever​ @awesomenavy​ @crazygirlinthisworld​ @butdaddyilovehim-hs​ @luxiorchive​ @alchemxx @narry-heart 

[half-eclipse]

⋆.˚ ☾ .⭒˚ regressor!daisy x cg!karen ᶻ 𝗓 𐰁 [fic]

daisy has a nightmare and karen makes it better<3

note: i didn’t read this back so hopefully its okay, also my first ever lil fic :,)

Daisy wakes in a cold sweat, her nightmare jolting her body upwards. She breathes heavily, tears spilling down her cheeks as she hugs her knees to her chest. She clutches the stuffed dog beside her, trying to soothe her racing heart.

Her nightmare had been one of the worst she’s had in a long time. It replays in her mind, broken fragments of the night in Miami, all alone and cold on the shower floor tiles. The memories suddenly feel too fresh and real, the fear and pain flooding back to her in an instant.

She wants Karen. She fidgets with the sheets underneath her, her hands shaking. She glances at the door that separates her room from Karen’s, where she’s no doubt sleeping soundly. It wouldn’t be fair, she thinks, to disturb Karen at this hour. They’d all had a long day in the studio the day before, everyone returning to their beds that night far too early and far too exhausted.

She lets out a shaky sigh, feeling small and vulnerable in the dark room.

Maybe Karen would think it was stupid. Daisy is an adult, why couldn’t she lull herself back to sleep? Except, right now she doesn’t feel like an adult. She feels like that lonely little girl, struggling night after night to fall asleep with no one around willing to comfort her.

Before she realizes it, her thumb is making her way to her mouth. She knows Karen would chastise her for it, saying it’s yucky and bad for her teeth. But she’ll take any amount of comfort right now, still weighing the pros and cons of waking Karen.

A branch outside cracks against her window and then she’s up, clutching her stuffed dog to her chest. She pads quietly towards Karen’s room, not wanting to disturb the other band members sleeping peacefully in their own rooms. She wouldn’t know how to explain why she’s making her way to Karen’s room at this time of night if she were to be caught.

Daisy hesitates outside of Karen’s cracked open door, her mind filling with doubts. But her need to be held by Karen outweighs the fear of disturbing her, and she raises her trembling hand to knock gently.

“Karen?” She calls quietly, voice far too small and timid. She waits a few beats, chewing on the skin around her thumb, heart beating rapidly in her chest. Karen doesn’t even stir.

Daisy feels a pang of stupidity, and for a moment she considers turning around and going back to her own room. But she feels so small and she needs Karen to help her brain stop feeling so clouded and messy. She tries again, voice cracking as she hiccups a little sob.

Karen wakes at this, rubbing her eyes as she sits up. “Daisy?” She asks, voice sleepy. Karen was never one to wake up too fast. “What are you doing awake?”

Daisy’s sniffle tells her everything she needs to know, and she leans over to click on the salt lamp on her nightstand. The soft, warm light illuminates the room in a gentle glow, enough that she can see Daisy’s terrified, tear-streaked face and the little dog clutched tightly to her chest.

She’s immediately awake, protectiveness washing over her. “Oh, sweetheart, was it a bad dream?” She says gently, pushing the covers around until there’s a spot for Daisy. She pats the space beside her, welcoming Daisy in.

Daisy immediately clambers over, crawling into the sheets and snuggling into Karen’s chest. “Bad dream.” She lisps out, hiccuping now. Karen’s face softens and she rubs Daisy’s arms.

“Do you wanna tell me about it?” She asks the trembling girl, pushing sweaty bangs away from her face. Daisy shakes her head no, breath picking up again.

“Hey, hey, Daisy, look at me.” She coos, lifting Daisy’s head to meet her eyes. “You don’t have to tell me, love.” Her voice is soft and soothing, and she takes Daisy’s hand that isn’t clinging to the soft plush and places it on her chest so Daisy can feel her heartbeat.

“I want you to breathe with me, okay? Follow me.” She takes a deep breath, and Daisy mirrors her shakily, feeling the steady rhythm of Karen’s heartbeat under her chest. It grounds her, and she calms slowly, making Karen smile.

“There you go. There’s my girl.” She says quietly, pulling Daisy in to kiss her forehead.

Daisy smiles then, a wave of peace washing over her. How silly of her to think that Karen would’ve thought it was stupid, when she’s the one person in the entire world who has probably seen every side of her, who understands all her pain and fears.

Her thumb moves towards her mouth, and Karen gently stops her before she can reach her lips. “No, little love. That’s no good for you. Where’s your pacifier?” She asks, and Daisy just shrugs, a pout forming on her lips.

Karen detaches herself from the smaller girl, who whines at the loss of contact immediately, fearing that Karen will get up and leave. Instead, Karen shushes her gently, pulling out a soft brown pacifier from her nightstand.

“Here you go, Dais.” She kisses her cheeks, making the girl giggle as she takes the pacifier in her mouth. She whispers a small thank you around her pacifier, immediately clinging to Karen again.

She clicks off the salt lamp, tucking the sheet over Daisy gently. “It’s too late for someone so small to be awake. Can you close your eyes for me, hun?”

Daisy is already a few steps ahead, eyes drooping sleepily as she snuggles closer to Karen. She nods, not fully listening to what Karen is saying, just enjoying the feeling of being so close to the other girl. Karen strokes her hair, falling back asleep beside her.

⋆.˚ ☾ .⭒˚

[my-own-walker]

Hello. My dog just recently passed away and she was the light of my life. I was wondering if you could write one of the Evan’s comforting reader after they lose a pet? You can feel free to pick any character you want but if you don’t mind, I’d love it to be with Kit <3 just super fluffy and comforting? If not that’s totally okay too

Sleep With The Tides

note: aghhhh absolutely my love. i am so sorry that happened to you, i know it all too well. sending alllll of my love and support to you right now. also feel free to reach out if you need to talk!

warnings: mentions of pet loss, grief, kit fluff, the beginning is very sad please be warned...i expedited this one because i know how hard this time is, so bear with any possible typos or grammar errors!

+++

Goldie was a good girl. She never ran when I left the door open by accident. She was so good, she would go on walks by herself, with no leash, and just wear herself out until she felt like coming home. She was so tolerant of everyone. She was trained so well. Trained by me.

She left me. She gave me one last kiss on the nose before crossing over into paradise. Kit was there when it happened. I rang him as soon as I noticed things weren't right. I was right that I would need him.

He immediately wrapped me in an all-encompassing hug and shielded me from it all. I remember screaming. I remember sobbing. But I can't remember how I sounded. It felt like the louder I cried, the more silent the world got.

There was nothing he could say to help. He just held me until my body stopped being wracked by unrestrained sobs. He only left to grab me a glass of water before returning to holding me. Right there on the living room floor next to my baby girl.

'She was a great pup, darlin',' Kit whispered softly into my ear. 'She's not far. You'll see her again someday.' His drawl was warm and inviting, cushioning my mind from the blow of reality. I sniffed and breathed my first full breath.

'She can't be gone,' I spoke, almost noiselessly. I stared off for a moment before turning my head and catching a glimpse of her soft tail. I buried my head in Kit's chest and resumed weeping.

'I know, I know birdie,' he cooed. 'Should we go into the other room now?' I mustered a nod. I couldn't stay there with her. Kit helped me up by holding both of my shoulders and guided me into my bedroom, his body as close as it could be to me the whole time.

+

Hours later, Kit wrapped Goldie in a blanket and dug a hole in the yard. He did it all without my knowing. He set her collar and sweet pink bow on the kitchen side before returning to me, sleeping in my bed. I didn't feel tired, but suddenly I was asleep, then awake again.

I woke to the sound of Kit coming into the room. For a moment, everything felt okay. I almost couldn't remember why my eyes felt swollen and my throat felt raw.

'Kit,' I croaked, sitting up quickly. And it was as if in that moment the world turned on its axis for the second time that day. It all came back to me and tears rushed to my eyes.

'Aw, baby,' Kit uttered. He rushed to my side and began rubbing my back.

'Gosh, no, I'm sorry,' I stammered, sniffling and rubbing my eyes. 'I'm being so silly. She was just a dog.'

‘It’s okay to cry darlin',' Kit replied, still rubbing my back. 'She wasn't just a dog, she was family.' He kicked off his shoes and shifted so that he was sitting on the bed with me, his back up against the headboard. He patted his lap to beckon me closer. 'C'mere.'

I slotted myself in between his legs, laying slightly on my side so my head could rest comfortably on his chest. He wrapped his arms around me tightly and sighed.

'Do ya wanna talk about it?' His voice rumbled deep in his chest. He was warm and soft and smelled like motor oil, tobacco, and sage.

'It just happened so fast. All of it,' I mumbled. 'I can't even believe it's real.'

'She lived such a wonderful life because of you, Y/N,' he said, stroking my hair. 'It'll be different without her, but she was happy. You gave her everything.'

'I feel like I could have done more,' I sniffled. Kit squeezed me tighter and placed a kiss on top of my head.

'Don't say that, doll,' he tutted. 'She loved you so much.'

'Kit, can you stay for a while?'

'I can stay as long as you need me. Later on, I'll take you in the car to my place so I can grab a few things. I don't want you alone right now,' he answered. 'I love you.'

'I love you too, Kit."

+++

Again, I'm SO sorry for your loss. I know not much will take the pain away but please let me know if you need anything!

[moonchildreads]

small town

Chapter 20 - Self Control

IN THIS CHAPTER: The last high school party, apple flavored Kool-Aid, and Andy gets what he deserves [10.3k]

WARNINGS: underaged drinking, mentions of drug use (weed), slut shaming, a little misunderstanding (gets resolved really quickly), suggestive themes? (very mild, eddie's just a little bit wired, okay?)

A/N: i know i'm a day late, i'm sorry T.T someone got fired at my job and i'm supposed to handle their shit now because my boss is kinda cheap. it is what it is. BUT. hopefully this chapter makes up for my tardiness because as you can probably tell from the banner, the slow burn is officially boiling, you guys! enjoy <3

masterlist - prev - next | playlist

In the night, no control Through the wall something's breaking

Saturday, May 31st - 1986

Dottie was pacing like a nervous dog in a cage, feet hitting the soft rug in front of her closet with each step she took. It was the first Saturday in a long time that she hadn't spent in a blissful domestic bubble with Eddie and she was feeling downright antsy. The night before, once Hellfire had officially said goodbye to its Class of '86, the two teens had sat themselves in a booth at the back of The Hideaway with burgers, fries, and milkshakes, and something had finally clicked into place for her. There was no longer a specific need for them to spend so much time together anymore - no more exams to study for, no more books to read or worksheets to fill, and yet there they were still, on a Friday night, getting food together like usual. Sitting opposite of Eddie in that booth, watching him try to lick ketchup from the corner of his mouth and not reaching the smudge with the tip of his tongue, it dawned on Dottie that she had never loved anyone the way she loved him.

It wasn't that Dottie hadn't loved throughout her life, because truthfully she had. She had loved her Dad first, tiny fingers wrapping around a big thumb when she was just a few hours old. She'd loved her Grandparents, all four of them equally, but maybe no one should tell them that Grandma Jo leaving after a visit would always cause the biggest sobs to escape her tiny toddler body. She'd loved her Uncle Johnny, always cuddling up to him while they lived together, not really understanding that he wasn't actually her Uncle until it was too late to start calling him anything else. She'd loved her friends back in New York, even though she knew now that they hadn't loved her back in return. Hell, she'd loved Tyler, or else it wouldn't have hurt as much as it did when he broke her heart. Dottie wasn't someone that didn't know what loving meant or felt like, but the way she loved Eddie was unlike any other kind of love she had ever experienced before, and she knew she had to tell him sometime soon or she'd regret it for the rest of her life.

But first, there was prom, and graduation, and most pressingly, a party for which she had absolutely no idea of what she was going to wear, hence the continuous pacing. James, tired of hearing the back and forth on the wooden floors for the last fifteen minutes, came into his daughter's bedroom resigned to play stylist for the night like he'd done so many times before. Keeping up with the latest trends for the sake of his little girl was a full time job he had long ago learned to love.

"Do you know what Nancy is gonna wear?" he asked, sitting down at the end of Dottie’s bed.

"No, I didn't think to ask. But she always looks so pretty, Dad, I can't look like a bum."

"How about you tell me what you don't want to wear and we can start from there, okay?"

Thirty minutes later, Dottie had an outfit laid out where James had been sitting and she was doing her makeup in a hurry before Nancy picked her up. The plan was simple: go to the party, say hi to Chrissy and thank her for the invite, hang out with Nancy for a bit, meet up with the boys, and if the party sucked, head over to Jeff's for a movie night. He'd rented Ghoulies and Weird Science for the weekend and he still hadn't seen either, so it seemed as good a backup plan as any. Besides, movie nights had always meant sharing a blanket with Eddie and cozying up to him when she got sleepy. No matter what ended up happening, she knew her night wouldn't be completely terrible.

"Honey? Are you done yet? Nancy is here!" James yelled from the bottom of the stairs.

"I'll be down in a second!" she hurried to put on her clothes and ran down the stairs to meet her friend, crossbody bag bouncing behind her and hitting her backside.

She found Nancy politely making small talk with her Dad on the foyer; James had gone to school with her mom Karen and had fond memories of sharing a desk with her throughout their many years at Hawkins’ various academic buildings. They hadn't exactly been friends, but they always were on good terms and had even worked on a few projects together, namely one about growing sprouts from beans in mason jars when they were in middle school.

"Hey! Sorry for making you wait," Dottie said, stopping to hug Nancy who was better prepared to receive it than she had been in the school’s bathroom a day before.

"You're fine, don't worry about the time," Nancy reassured her. "There aren't any schedules to keep at these parties, everyone just comes and goes when they want to."

"Oh, good to know that we can just leave whenever if it sucks."

"Speaking of that," James said, getting his daughter's attention. "Call me if you're staying at Jeff's, okay? I'll come pick you up tomorrow."

"Donny can drop me off, you don’t gotta come," she waved her hand nonchalantly.

"Okay, but call me anyway so I know where you are. Take care you two, don't get too wild."

"Dad, seriously," Dottie rolled her eyes, exasperated but not without fondness. She knew he worried too much, but after all they’d been through, she couldn't blame him.

"Have a good night, Mr. Burke, it was nice to meet you," Nancy said, heading out with Dottie at her heels.

"You too, Nancy. Say hi to your parents for me, will you?"

The girls got into Nancy's car and drove away towards Loch Nora, the radio playing The Rolling Stones’ Harlem Shuffle softly in the background. They talked about random things, filling the empty space with the kind of anxious but lighthearted conversations one would have with someone they don’t know very well yet. So far their budding friendship had proved satisfactory for both girls, and they were willing to put in the effort to get to know one another better, even when that meant having to venture outside the comfort zone The Weekly Streak’s newsroom provided. During the ride Nancy complimented Dottie's outfit, and in turn, she had loudly admired hers, prompting the blue-eyed girl to admit she'd borrowed the shiny jacket with padded shoulders from her Mom’s wardrobe. After a good-natured laugh, Dottie admitted she had stolen her dress from her Mom’s closet too and Nancy told her her Mom had good taste. When they parked across the street from Jason Carver's house however, the friendly chatter ceased and both girls stared at the two-storey rising in front of them with apprehension.

"I'm so nervous," Dottie admitted, watching the colors spilling from the fairy lights inside the living room paint the veranda red, then green, then blue, and finally back to red.

"Me too," Nancy said, taking a shaky breath. "But we got this. How bad can it be?"

"Yeah. You’re right. It’ll be fun," Dottie nodded, and arm in arm they ventured inside the packed house in search of good old teenage normalcy.

Neither Nancy nor Dottie were having the slightest bit of fun. After a few shouted-over-loud-music hellos to some familiar faces, they had found themselves in Jason’s kitchen, nursing cups of a strange brown concoction that didn’t smell good and tasted even worse. Dottie wasn’t much of a drinker, and apparently Nancy wasn’t either, citing that the last time she’d gotten drunk, she’d embarrassed herself so badly she’d rather not have a repeat. The jocks and popular kids disagreed heavily with that assessment, and were having a lot of fun with two kegs in the backyard next to the pool. Dottie had suggested they venture out, sit by the water where it wasn’t as stuffy, but Nancy had quickly directed her into the kitchen where they ran into Marcie Hurley, an acquaintance from the newspaper club. Marcie was a lovely tall girl with a bold pixie cut; she was currently slightly intoxicated but full of ideas for stories to run in the last edition of The Weekly Streak before summer holidays started. Nancy pretended to listen to her with her utmost attention, but Dottie could tell by the way her eyes were glazed over that she was definitely calculating how much more she’d have to hear before she could get away without coming across as rude. Two girls Dottie didn’t know walked into the kitchen searching for something fruity to drink when they said something that caught her attention.

“What do you mean Munson said no?” one of the girls was saying.

“He said he wasn’t selling tonight! Which is honestly such bullshit, he was smoking with some other guys, he definitely had something on him,” the second girl said, pouring vodka into a cup.

“Show him your tits, maybe he’ll share with you.”

“Ew, I’m not that desperate!” the first one laughed loudly.

Dottie scowled immediately. She’d once gotten curious about him dealing and asked him a couple of questions, like how did he get into selling and if he was allowed to smoke his own product. Eddie hadn’t been particularly proud of his answers, but she told him she didn’t mind: the money helped pay for some bills around the trailer and put food onto their table. It wasn’t like he was dealing hard stuff or was some kind of mafia lord moving tons of product, for fuck’s sake. People talked about him like he had his thumb on the illegal underground in Hawkins when in reality, he was just a teen selling weed and a couple of pills here and there to a few fellow students at parties. Dottie hoped he’d never done something as gross as asking a girl to show him her body in exchange for a couple of hits of a shitty joint. She liked to believe she knew Eddie, and in her opinion he’d never do something like that, but teenagers had never been particularly known for making good choices. Nancy was already looking at her when she turned around, a knowing smile on her face. She nodded towards the door once, and after a whispered “thank you” off Dottie went in search of her friends.

The boys were enjoying the fresh air and sharing a smoke on the veranda at the front of the house, not really ready to go inside and face the music just yet. Donny had picked up Gareth and Jeff on his way to the party, but Eddie had arrived solo just a few minutes after them. They were talking about music, as they often did, when Dottie opened the front door and jumped on Jeff’s back, who flinched in surprise.

“Fucking hell, Dot, you’re gonna kill me someday if you keep doing that,” he said, rubbing his chest.

“I was worried you guys weren’t gonna show up,” she admitted, hanging onto his shoulders. He leaned his weight into her, hands wrapping around her loose wrists like they were backpack straps to keep her in place as they swayed side to side.

“Party sucks that much?” Donny asked, passing along the joint to Gareth.

“I mean, it’s not like I know a lot of people here. I’ve been hearing Nancy talk to other girls all night, and I think she’s as fed up as me.”

“Wanna ditch?” Jeff asked.

“We’re not leaving until I drink my fuckin’ weight in rich people’s beer,” Gareth declared, giving the cig to Eddie who took a long drag and put the roach out on the underside of the railing he was leaning against.

“If you want beer, there are a bunch of cans in the kitchen but you gotta fish them out of the cooler and someone spilled something green in there. It’s kinda gross,” Dottie grimaced.

“What? No keg?”

“Actually, there’s two in the backyard but the basketball team took ownership of one and I think the football team was doing handstands on top of the other one.”

“That’s so fucking lame,” Donny scoffed.

“Well then, who’s down for fishing?” Jeff looked at the guys, and Gareth shrugged, putting his hands in his jean pockets and following him inside.

“You coming?” Donny asked Eddie who didn’t move from his spot.

“Nah, gonna smoke a cig first. You go ahead,” he said, getting his Camels out of his front pocket.

Donny headed back inside and then it was just Dottie and Eddie under the moonlight, the tiny lamp above the front door doing nothing to shield them from the darkness. Eddie smiled, putting the cigarettes back in his pocket and opening his arms so Dottie could sheepishly tuck herself into him. She felt like she could finally breathe easy when feeling his chest rising up and down under her cheek, his warmth seeping into her bones.

“Too many people?” he asked knowingly, cupping the back of her head with one of his hands. Her fingers drew patterns on the soft cotton of his shirt.

“Mhm,” she nodded. “This is nice.”

“Yeah? You like my shirt?”

“Smells good,” she laughed. He smelled like Old Spice aftershave and laundry detergent.

“Why, thank you for noticing I showered, princess,” he said, grinning. “You look pretty. This your Mom’s dress?”

“Yeah,” she beamed, looking down at her shift baby blue dress. “I didn’t know what to wear so I just played it safe. The socks are new though,” she lifted her leg to show her white ankle socks with frills under her black kitten heels.

“So cute,” Eddie pouted theatrically, making her slap his chest in return. “No, really. You look nice.”

“Thanks,” she settled back against him, cheeks burning.

They enjoyed each other’s presence for a few seconds when the front door opened with a bang, an overexcited and red-eyed Chrissy Cunningham spilling out from the inside, her giggles following her as she skipped towards them in tune with the music coming from the speakers in the living room.

“Am I interrupting something?” she asked, a mischievous grin gracing her fairy-like features.

“Hey, Chris,” Eddie smiled, still holding onto Dottie as she turned in his arms to take a look at the newcomer. “How was your latest purchase?

“It was so good. Valerie, Julie and I just smoked a joint each in the bathroom,” she whispered conspiratorially, making Dottie laugh.

“Oh my. What would Jason say if he knew you were hotboxing his shower?” Eddie matched her tone.

“What Jason doesn’t know won’t hurt him. D’you want to smoke with us later, Dot? Only girls allowed.”

“Sorry, I’m not really a smoker,” Dottie said, feeling a little bit dumb. “But I’ll take you up on that Queen song you promised me yesterday if you wanna dance.”

“Oh my God, yes!” Chrissy grabbed her arm and pulled her out of Eddie’s grasp. “She’s mine now, Ed!”

“I can see that. I’m gonna go get a beer,” Eddie said, following them inside. “Have fun, ladies!”

“We will!”

Weed affects different people in different ways. That was a fact Dottie knew after spending so much time with the members of Corroded Coffin, better known as her best friends. Donny was always virtually the same after a good session, just got very thirsty. Eddie would get deep and thoughtful, and once the effects were gone, he’d get so hungry he’d eat drywall if it was the only thing around. Gareth, like Chrissy, would get giggly once he hit that sweet spot. It was like drinking, Donny had told her once. Everyone had a different tolerance, and most of the time taking a few hits of a shared joint wouldn’t be enough to change anyone’s personality significantly. There were other people like Jeff, for example, who had a very low tolerance and had decided to stop smoking altogether after realizing he’d get panicky and his clothes would always start itching each time he indulged in the vice with his friends. None of them had ever questioned him or pressured him to smoke after that, the same way that they didn’t pressure Dottie to smoke or drink when they were doing it around her. They’d always smoke outside, and Dottie and Jeff were free to lounge around on the couch and talk about anything and everything until they all regrouped inside again. Watching Chrissy be so carefree and joyful made Dottie think that maybe she’d enjoy being invited to one of their movie nights some day.

Chrissy, on the other hand, was a girl on a mission. There were no movie nights being planned in her head; she was instead focused on getting information out of Dottie to relay to Eddie at his earliest convenience. Chrissy liked Dottie, she really did. She liked how kind and attentive she was despite always walking around with an anxiety cloud above her head. She liked how she dressed, with her vintage clothing and big earrings Chrissy couldn’t wear because it’d be dangerous for a cheerleader to be tossed around with hoops or fun acrylic shapes dangling from her ears. She liked how she made Eddie feel, and Chrissy liked Eddie very much, so that just cemented Dottie in her mind as a good person to have around. And so, the blonde lulled her into a sense of comradery with heartfelt compliments and wild dances, trying to get to the bottom of the question she’d had swirling around in her brain for two months now: do you like my friend or is he wasting his time to end with his heart broken? To her credit, what came out of her mouth was much more subtle than that.

“Eddie’s awesome, isn’t he?” Chrissy asked, casting her line into the sea and waiting for Dottie to bite.

“Yeah, he’s great!”

“He was so right about us being friends! I’m so happy you came!”

“Well, thank you for inviting me!” Dottie smiled at her, and Chrissy squeezed her hand in response.

The party was in full swing now. Nancy had found a couple of classmates she got along with and finally managed to escape Marcie’s insistent newspaper talk; she looked much more happy talking to them near the door to the backyard than she’d looked like back in the kitchen. Donny, Gareth and Jeff were fishing out beer cans from the cooler and passing them along to people that normally ignored them in the hallways, their bravery for sticking their hands into the horrid green liquid making them the heroes of underaged teens trying to get unbearably drunk before inevitably throwing up all over Mrs. Carver’s bushes. Eddie stood to a side, near the archway that led to the stairs where bubblegum pink eyeshadow Marianne from his Sociology class had just disappeared up to with his lovesick boyfriend trailing behind her, much to his friends’ jeers and claps. The metalhead had a barely sipped on beer in his hand and hearts in his eyes as he watched Dottie and Chrissy spin around in the middle of the living room, singing along to Top 40 hits and dodging couples making out.

Eddie had never felt happy at a house party before. He’d usually drop by, deal a little bit from the back of his van, and speed away either to Jeff’s house to hang out with his friends or back towards his trailer where he’d smoke and fuck around with his guitar until he’d fall asleep on his tummy with his jeans still on. But standing there, seeing his friends being treated like normal people instead of the dirt beneath a shoe, he felt happy at a party for once in his life. He felt like a normal teenager, like everyone else in the Hawkins High Class of ‘86 saying goodbye to a long school year and hello to the unforgettable summer ahead. Chrissy made a suggestive face at him while dancing around with Dottie and Eddie laughed.

“Hey, Munson!” a familiar voice said, coming to clap his shoulder and snapping him out of his trance.

“Hey, Foster. How are you doing?”

“Weird seeing you here,” Kyle Foster of the Yearbook Club said, looking friendly but fidgety. “You never sell inside at these things.”

“Not selling tonight, man. Just enjoying the beer,” he lifted his can above waist level to demonstrate.

“Ah, dude, that sucks. I had a twenty with your name on it,” he clicked his tongue. “But if our deal still stands, I guess in a couple of weeks you’ll have a bag with my name on it.”

“I’m a man of my word, Foster,” Eddie smirked, shoving his hand into his pocket. “But here, for your troubles.”

He produced a tightly rolled joint from inside his packet of Camels and extended it to Kyle, who looked at him like he’d grown two heads. Never in his entire time being Eddie’s customer had he sold him a pre-roll, much less one that he had intended to smoke himself at some point. He eyed him curiously, not making any moves to pluck it out of the dealer’s hand.

“You sure about that, Munson?” he asked, giving him the chance to recant his offer.

“Yeah, you can have it. I’m not gonna smoke it and I’m feeling generous tonight. Just don’t send anyone else my way, okay? It’s the only one I had.”

“Y-yeah, man, sure! Thanks,” Kyle smiled, grabbing his prize for holding a polite conversation with the town’s freak who felt like less and less of a monster as the school year came to a close. “Here, take the twenty anyways,” he pulled a single bill from his back pocket. “Sorry about, y’know, that whole thing. See you when the yearbooks come out!”

And with that, he shoved the note into Eddie’s hand and left towards the backyard, probably in search of a borrowed lighter to spark up in a corner of Jason Carver’s lush garden. Eddie looked down at his hand, snorted, and put the twenty bucks away to spend another day. Maybe he’d get Dottie a strawberry milkshake like he’d done the day before, only to watch her eyes light up at the first taste and indulge in her pleas because it’s so good, Ed, you gotta try this! They make them with real strawberries! Chrissy found his eyes again over Dottie’s shoulder and stuck her tongue out at him. He clutched his chest like he had been hurt by her, overdramatic as always, and Dottie twirled Chrissy around breaking their eye contact. The songs changed but the girls stayed dancing and he kept on watching them with a satisfied smile on his face. It was a shame, really, that Eddie often became blind whenever he saw the girl he was in love with being truly, completely happy, because if he didn’t, he would have noticed one Andy fucking Humphrey staring at him like he could make the dumb metalhead drop dead in a heartbeat just by looking at him.

Jason Carver wasn’t the typical high school bully you’d see in films. Truthfully, he wasn’t even a bully; he just kept quiet while his friends did all the fucked up things the basketball team was infamous for. He was known as someone who would fly off the handle quickly, but not without reason. He took freshmen and sophomores under his wing, taught them what being a good teammate looked like, gave them a family within the walls of Hawkins High as part of his team. Jason was, if anything else failed, extremely protective and fiercely loyal to his own, and expected the same considerations to be returned to him. So when Andy, one of his best friends since elementary, came running to tell him that The Freak of Hawkins High was trying to flirt with his girlfriend in front of everyone, Jason had no reason to doubt him. Why would he, when Andy had been nothing but reliable all this time?

“What do you think you’re doing, creep?” Jason told Eddie, his tone low, trying not to call too much attention to themselves. Chrissy didn’t need to see this, she didn’t have to know she was being ogled by a pervert under his own roof.

“Drinking your beer, Carver, what does it look like I’m doing?” Eddie said with a sour tone, and instantly knew that had been the wrong answer.

“Yeah? What makes you think you’re welcome in my house?”

“Chill, man, I got invited, same as everyone else.”

“Who would want you here?” Chance Peterson said, appearing at Jason’s shoulder. This was bad.

“Uh, his girlfriend? Just like everyone else?” Eddie deadpanned, putting his can of beer on a ledge and lifting his palms. “Look, I’m really not looking to cause any trouble tonight-”

“Why would Chrissy invite you? You aren’t friends,” Patrick asked, and Eddie held back a scoff. He was willing to bet he knew Chrissy, the real Chrissy, more than any of these meatheads did.

“She invited all the seniors, that’s all there is to it. I’m a senior too-”

“Yeah, a senior citizen, you freak,” Chance said. “Why don’t you go home early and leave us actual seniors alone, huh? What is this, your tenth time trying to graduate?”

“See Peterson, I always knew you didn’t know how to count, but didn’t think you would be so bad at it. Should have known though, it’s not like anyone expects you to do anything that isn’t playing around with your balls. Now why don’t you back off and let your captain here and I have a civil conversation, alright?” Eddie looked down at Chance who narrowed his eyes at him, but Jason threw his arm out to stop him from moving forward.

“We’re not having a conversation, Munson. Back off my girlfriend or leave.”

“I’m not interested in your fuckin’ girlfriend, Carver,” Eddie said, bewildered.

“You say that, but you sure were looking at her before we walked in,” Andy said, stepping around his friends to stand next to Jason. “Wanna explain that?”

“Is looking at someone a goddamn crime now? Can’t exactly leave my eyes at home, you dumbass,” Eddie said, getting loud.

“So you were looking at Chrissy!” Jason yelled.

“No, I wasn’t! Believe it or not, not everyone is fuckin’ in love with your girlfriend, man!”

“Hey, what’s going on here?” Donny flanked Eddie, his voice booming over the sound of the music.

“Back off, dude, what’s your deal?” Gareth threatened Chance when he shoulder-checked him.

People were starting to catch on now, curious eyes looking around for the latest gossip. Jason and Eddie yelling at each other wasn’t exactly new, but both groups of friends having a screaming match at a house party? Now, that was juicy. As everyone started insulting and trying to intimidate each other, Eddie looked around trying to find Dottie in the crowd. She was still dancing with Chrissy, oblivious to the conflict, and now another cheerleader had joined them; he was pretty sure she was a junior and her name was Valerie.

“Hey! Stop looking at her, asshole!” Andy said, grabbing Eddie’s hair and turning his head back towards the imminent fight.

Andy’s voice was loud enough to startle the girls and make them look their way. Chrissy and Valerie paled instantly, hurrying forward to try to contain the scene before it turned truly ugly, leaving a path open behind them for Dottie to follow. Chrissy grabbed Jason’s arm and tried pulling him away when Eddie turned to Dottie and shook his head, his curls still in Andy’s grasp.

“It’s okay, Dot, stay over there!” he told her, not wanting to get her involved and hurt.

But it was too late, because Andy, as stupid as he was, caught on pretty quickly. He hadn’t recognized her before, all dolled up and giggly while she danced with Chrissy and Valerie. He’d simply assumed she was one of their friends, maybe even a junior he hadn’t really paid too much attention to while in school. Insistent on Eddie perving on Chrissy, he’d missed a crucial detail: that the unknown girl she was dancing with was the same girl that had threatened him in the AP Spanish classroom just a week ago. The same one that had told him to stay away from the Hellfire Club. That girl wasn’t Chrissy’s friend, she was a freak, merely blending in with the rest of the school population because she didn’t wear dark colors and leather. Andy turned on her so quickly she didn’t have time to heed Eddie’s warning before he was spewing venom towards her.

“I see now, freak,” Andy said, letting go of Eddie’s hair with a shove and stepping towards Dottie. “You weren’t looking at Chrissy, you were looking at your bitch.”

“What the fuck did you just call me?” Dottie said, angrily.

“That’s what you are, isn’t it? The freak’s little bitch. That’s why you came after me last week, huh?” Andy was seething. “Did he tell you to do that?”

“You brought that on your own by being a smug idiot,” she told him, not backing down from the fight even though she was terrified of him.

“Wait, what are you talking about?” Patrick asked.

“This slut tried to tell Mr. Lorenzo that I cheated on a test if I didn’t leave her friends alone,” Andy explained, once again looking smug. Everyone was watching them now. “Said I was gonna lose my ride to college, acted all flirty and shit. What is it, honey? The freak not giving it to you good enough? Do they all share you, like the big whore you a-”

“Fuck!”

Dottie hadn’t hesitated. Instead, she’d just simply punched him right in the face with her right fist, thumb on the outside like her Grandpa Ken had taught her when they were boxing in his backyard one summer, hitting pillows and humming along to the Rocky theme song while Grandma Caroline made fresh lemonade. The crack that followed the punch was deafening. All chatter ceased and the music was turned off - if a needle were to hit the floor, it would have been so easily heard in the silence that followed her expletive. It had hurt for him, yes, something was definitely broken, but the impact on her knuckles had split the delicate skin covering them, not used to being treated so roughly by colliding against a jock’s bones. Andy pinched his nose with pain, blood starting to pour down his cupid’s bow.

“Wait, no!” Chrissy gasped, as Andy reached over to take someone’s beer can out of their hand and emptied it on Dottie’s head, throwing it away once it was empty. The metal clang on the floor until it hit someone’s shoe.

“What the fuck?” Gareth managed to say, before Eddie launched himself and pushed Andy away from Dottie who just stood there clutching at her hand and looking at the floor in shock.

Her Mom’s dress was ruined, sticky liquid dripping from her hair onto the soft fabric, staining everything as it went down, down, down onto her thighs and legs until it reached her socks. She smelled like an alcoholic and her fingers hurt. She felt empty, adrenaline leaving her body as she shivered while everything around her dissolved into utter chaos. The Hellfire Club and the basketball team were yelling and pushing each other once again, people rushing to get out of their way so they wouldn’t get hit. With the reflexes of someone used to being on alert, Nancy grabbed Dottie’s arm and yanked her aside just in time for Andy to push Eddie off himself and into a side table. Eddie hit the floor with a sickening crunch, but what made everyone stop the brawl was the sound of the lamp on top cracking into a million little pieces right next to the couch.

“Jason, stop this!” Chrissy pleaded, hanging onto his arm.

Andy, not one to be deterred, snapped his head towards Dottie, not caring that Nancy threw an arm out to cover her with her own body. He raised his hand, fully on board with hurting either of them to make a point, when Jason finally snapped into action and grabbed him by the collar, pulling him into Patrick’s arms who instantly held him in place, Chance coming over to help.

“Are you crazy?” Jason yelled at his friend. “We don’t hit women!”

He turned just in time to see Chrissy helping Eddie up, the two of them muttering to each other softly, looking a lot more friendly than he liked. His eye twitched once and he looked at Hellfire as they huddled closer to each other and started inching towards the exit, Nancy and Chrissy herding them out.

“Get out of my fucking house!” Jason told them, like they weren’t already trying to leave.

“Gladly,” Donny said, closing the door behind them and shielding them from further aggressions.

“You guys, I am so sorry,” Chrissy was saying, not knowing who to direct it to first.

“It’s okay, Chris. Not your fault your boyfriend has shithead friends,” Eddie said, patting her shoulder in comfort.

“Still, I should have-,” she cut herself off because there was nothing she could have done; the basketball team and the Hellfire Club were destined to hate each other until the end of time. She turned to Dottie instead. “Are you okay?”

“Y-yeah, I think so. My hand hurts,” she sniffed. “I’m sorry we ruined your party.”

“Oh, please, that party sucked,” Chrissy snorted. “The most fun I had all night was when we were dancing with Val.”

“Come on, let’s get you home,” Donny said, guiding Dottie towards his car.

“I can drive her, I brought her here,” Nancy offered, giving him half a smile. She wasn’t friends with the guys, but she knew enough about them through Mike to have at the very least positive feelings towards them. Besides, it wasn’t like Jonathan hadn’t also been an outcast back when he was still in Hawkins. She knew what that was like.

“No, no,” Dottie hurried to say. “You should both go back to the party. Eddie can drive me, Don, I don’t want to ruin your car.”

“Are you sure?” Chrissy said, not wanting to leave her in such a vulnerable state.

“Yes, I’m sure. Go back inside, it’s your party,” she squeezed the blonde’s hand. “I had fun dancing with you, thank you for inviting me.”

“Maybe we can do it again some day? Just us girls?” Chrissy said, eyes full of hope.

“I’d love that,” Dottie said, and she really meant it.

“Okay, then… let’s go back inside, Nancy. Bye guys, drive safe,” Chrissy waved at them, pulling her cardigan closed and both girls disappeared back into the house.

“Is this a bad time to say that I stole a case of beers?” Gareth said, lifting a 12-pack and bringing some much needed humor to the situation.

“Let’s go back to mine then, we can sneak in through the basement door,” Jeff proposed, and Donny nodded.

“I’m… I’m gonna pass, guys,” Eddie said. “I’ll take her home and head back to the trailer. My ass kinda hurts.”

“Have fun without us, okay? I’m sorry I ruined it,” Dottie said, tears swimming in her eyes. Whether it was because of the shame or the pain in her hand, no one knew but no one asked her either.

“Hey now, you didn’t ruin anything. We’ve got an awesome story to tell the kids someday,” Donny laughed.

“Yeah! We’ll be like: Auntie Dot broke a jock’s nose back in high school because he called her names,” Jeff said, putting on an old man voice and Dottie chuckled wetly.

“Come on, let’s go,” Eddie said, guiding her towards his van with a hand on her lower back.

“I should sit in the back, I’m gonna get your seats dirty,” Dottie said.

“Don’t even think about it, there’s no seatbelts in the back,” he said, climbing in and rummaging around for the tarp they covered Gareth’s drumset with when they moved it for gigs.

The music from inside the house was booming again when Donny’s car pulled into the street and the boys left, saying goodbye by honking twice. Eddie covered the front seat with the tarp and helped her get in, clicking the seatbelt for her in place and jogging to get to the driver’s side. Dottie stared out the window as Eddie turned the van on and backed up into the street, waving at a defeated Chrissy who was looking out from the living room’s window. When Eddie stopped at the first intersection, Dottie turned to look at him.

“Ed?” she asked in a shaky voice. “Can you take me to yours instead?”

The trailer was empty with all the lights turned off when they arrived, which was unusual for a Saturday night. Wayne had always had weekends off, after all, he had a kid at home to take care of and nobody was an asshole enough to ask an old man to come in during his time away with his family. Still, as Eddie kneeled down next to the entrance to help Dottie undo her heel buckles, she looked around while holding onto his shoulders and found herself missing her Mr. Wayne. Eddie had asked her in the van why she didn’t want to go home, and she had simply replied she didn’t want to tell her Dad she’d gotten into a fight just yet. She’d failed to mention that she was expecting Wayne to give her the parental comfort she needed, but without the grounding she was sure she was gonna get from her own father.

“He’s at the plant,” Eddie said, guessing her silent inquiry. “He’s doing extra time this weekend so he can take a couple of days off for graduation.”

“That’s really sweet,” she smiled, stepping out of her shoes now that he’d gotten them unbuckled. The beer that had dripped down her legs had stained the tops of her socks.

“Wait here, okay? I’ll get the shower running for you, the knobs are… well, they’re stupid,” he shrugged with resignation. “You can call your Dad if you want, tell him where you are.”

He started the shower for her while she dialed home, James picking up after a few long rings. He listened to her talk quietly while getting her a towel and clean clothes; she hadn’t exactly asked, but Eddie got confirmation that she wanted to spend the night when he heard her lie to her Dad about being at Jeff’s and having a movie night. Eddie wasn’t about to complain about her not mentioning she was with him if it meant he could sleep next to her for a full night. He went back into the bathroom, lowered the toilet’s lid and put the things he’d gathered for her on top before opening the mirror cabinet and pulling out a new toothbrush along with a packet of makeup wipes. She hung up and walked into the small bathroom after him, looking at the items in his hands with a quirked eyebrow.

“I wear eyeliner for our gigs sometimes,” he admitted. “It always looks like shit, but if it’s good enough for Ozzy, it’s good enough for me.”

“Maybe I can teach you how to do it right sometime,” she said, the corner of her mouth lifting into half a smile.

“Maybe you should just do my makeup so I don’t poke my eye out.”

“Okay,” she agreed. “I’ll do your makeup next time.”

“Kick your clothes out the door when you take them off, I’ll throw them in the washing machine for you,” he said, and left her to her devices.

He went back into his bedroom to give her privacy and get changed into his own PJs, which consisted of an old ratty t-shirt with a couple of holes around the neck and plaid pants he was sure had belonged to Wayne at some point in their lives. While he busied himself changing his sheets into fresh ones, putting her clothes in the washer and making his bedroom look somewhat presentable, Dottie tried to hurry up in the shower, not wanting to use up all the water. Still, she couldn’t help but take her time appreciating the fact that Eddie actually owned conditioner and that the green apple smell that surrounded him in the mornings belonged to the big bottle of shampoo in the corner of the tub. She washed all the beer off her skin and hair and, feeling a lot more like herself, wrapped her body into the soft off-white towel he’d gotten for her, standing at the mirror to rid herself of her make up as best as she could. She brushed her hair quickly, scrunching her curls into the towel to remove the excessive moisture, and brushed her teeth making a note to buy him a new toothbrush to replace the one she’d used. Timidly, she also reached for his deodorant, reasoning that it was better to use it than to stink up his clothes and bed with her sweat.

She was studying herself in the small mirror, not entirely believing that she was wearing Eddie’s clothes, when she realized the light scabbing on her knuckles had probably loosened up with the water and they were all bloody again like she’d never cleaned them up in the first place. Poking her head out of the bathroom, she directed her voice towards his bedroom where she could hear him pottering about.

“Eddie?” she called.

“Yeah?”

“D’you have any bandages? My hand’s bleeding again.”

“Uh, lemme see,” he pushed the door open and rummaged around in the sink cabinet, grabbing a little bag that contained their first aid supplies. “Come, sit on the bed,” he instructed, and she did as he asked without a word.

He kneeled in front of her and inspected her right hand, closing each finger carefully and pressing on parts of her palm to see if anything hurt. Nothing seemed to be permanently broken, so reached over to his bedside table where a cup of water sat and gave her an ibuprofen to help with the swelling before moving on with his next task. She watched him as he worked diligently to clean the scrapes, long thick fingers fluttering softly on her skin.

“What’s the diagnosis, doc?” Dottie asked.

“I’m getting a weird déjà vu here, princess,” he chuckled. “You need to stop getting into trouble before I get into pre-med.”

“Can’t help it. Trouble’s my middle name.”

“I thought it was Ann?” Eddie said, laughing.

Truthfully, he was joking around to hide the fact that he had been losing his mind since she’d opened the bathroom door and came out all rosy-cheeked, smelling like him and wearing his clothes. He’d given her one of his old shirts, a white one he hardly ever used anymore with a Garfield print at the front and his blue checkered boxers, not expecting them to look as big on her as they did. The hem of the shirt almost covered the shorts, and the short sleeves went past her elbows. The less was said about his gray socks that bunched up at her heel, the better, and he tried not to think about the fact that he knew she wasn’t wearing a bra because he’d had the most mortifying pleasure of throwing the cute cotton garment into his washing machine fifteen minutes earlier. Eddie was wrapping up her knuckles with a long piece of gauze when he noticed she’d gone strangely quiet. He looked up at her face to find her teary-eyed and chewing on a wobbly lip.

“Hey, what’s wrong?” he asked, holding onto her hand. “Is it too tight?”

“Is that… what everyone thinks about me?” she whispered, like she was afraid of asking out loud.

“I- I’m not sure I know what you’re talking about, darling.”

“Wh-what Andy said. About me being… does everyone think I’m a slut?”

“What? No! Of course not!” he stuck the gauze in place with a piece of medical tape and lifted himself onto his knees between her legs to hug her. “Dot, he didn’t even know who you were until tonight, he was just talking out of his ass.”

“I’m not a whore,” she muttered into his shoulder. “I promise I’m not.”

“Darling, what are you on about, huh?” he grabbed her face with two hands and brought her eyes to his. “I know you’re not. You could sleep with half this town and I still wouldn’t think you’re a whore. You- you can do whatever you want with whoever you want! I know you, you’re… Dot, you’re so fucking nice to me, to all of us, and the only reason Andy said that bullshit about you is because you’re friends with the freaks.”

“I’m not,” she said, and he looked at her in question. “I’m not friends with the freaks. I am a freak.”

“Hell yeah you are,” Eddie smiled. “You are a freak, and you shouldn’t let what that piece of shit said get to you, okay? You broke his fucking nose because he talked shit about you, Dot. You’re so fucking amazing.”

It was probably the way Eddie was looking at her like she’d hung the moon and all the stars, or maybe it was the way he was holding onto her face with a gentleness no one associated with the rugged metalhead, fingers extending under her ears and into her damp hair, thumbs on her cheeks. It was most definitely the way he always took care of her, how he cleaned her wounds like she was the most fragile thing on Earth and how he never hesitated to pull her into his arms whenever she needed a hug without questioning her reasons. But honestly, it was most likely the fact that he was so close to her, his warm breath mingling with her minty one, that had her leaning forward and pecking his lips with hers in the most chaste kiss she’d ever given to anyone in her entire life.

She tried pulling away as fast as she had leaned in, she really tried to, but Eddie felt like he had been struck by a live wire and instinctively chased her mouth with his own, still cupping her face but moving one of his hands to tangle into her hair, finally taking a hold of the proverbial carrot dangling in front of him. He was kissing her - Eddie Munson was kissing Dottie Burke and he couldn’t get enough of it - he needed more, he needed to consume her and she to him until there was nothing left for anyone to see. He grabbed onto her bare thigh to pull himself up and she whimpered, the walls of the illusion suddenly crashing around him. She’d just tearfully asked him if the town thought she was a whore, and his way of reassuring her, had been to deny it and then make a move on her. Eddie jumped back so quickly he fell onto his bruised ass and hissed in pain.

“Fuck, Dot, I’m- I’m so sorry!” he pleaded, leaving her dumbfounded and glazy-eyed.

He’d fucked up. He’d ruined everything. With his eagerness, he’d jumped the gun and now his plan was ruined, and she probably, maybe, definitely thought he was a fucking pervert trying to get into her pants, and yes, he very much would like to do that but not like this. Not before she knew he would quite literally die for her, not before he’d confessed to her the profound love he felt and had finally become the kind of man she deserved to have. Dottie looked at him not understanding what had just happened, but when she moved to get off the bed and closer to him, he jumped off the floor and put even more distance between them.

“I’m so sorry, we shouldn’t- fuck, I didn’t-”

“Eddie, it’s fine-

“No, it’s not fine!” his hands tangled in his own hair while he tried to find the words to explain himself. “This is all wrong, goddamnit-”

“Eddie, calm down-”

“Fuck, Chrissy is gonna kill me, I’m such a fucking idiot-”

“Ch-Chrissy?” Dottie whispered, but he didn’t hear her in the middle of his freakout.

Oh. Oh. She was so stupid. She couldn’t even blame him, she’d been influenced by her aunts and by Gareth - and of course, who wouldn’t be in love with Chrissy Cunningham, Head Cheerleader and Queen of Hawkins High? She was so kind, and friendly, with her gorgeous eyes and warm smiles. And by his own admission, if she was going to kill him, well, that certainly meant she returned Eddie’s affections, did it not? She’d be an idiot not to love Eddie back because Eddie was so loveable. Sweet, silly, wonderful Eddie who had just kissed his best friend and regretted it deeply. She had to get out of there if there was any hope of saving their friendship.

“I’m so sorry,” Dottie said, rushing out of the bedroom and into the kitchen.

“Dot, wait!” Eddie followed her. He had to fix this, he had to tell her, he was gonna tell her- “What are you doing?”

“I’m really so sorry, Eddie, I didn’t know,” she got her damp clothes out of the washing machine; the cycle had probably ended in the middle of his upset rant and neither of them had heard it.

“Where are you going? It’s midnight!” he watched her shove her feet into her heels, not bothering with fastening the buckles before she opened his front door. He had to act fast or he was going to lose her forever.

“Eddie, please,” she asked, tears pooling in her eyes again, voice broken. “I just want to go home. Everything’s fine, I’ll see you on Monday-”

“No!” he threw himself onto the door, closing it again effectively locking her in. “Y-you can’t leave like this! What are you gonna do, walk home in your heels? Are you insane?”

“Please, I’m sorry,” she sobbed, breaking his heart into a million tiny pieces. “We can forget this all happened, please, just let me go!”

“No!”

“Eddie!”

“No! We need to talk about this!”

“There’s nothing to talk about! I didn’t know you were dating her, just let me-”

“Wait, what?” It was Eddie’s turn to be confused. “I’m not dating anyone, what are you talking about?”

“I’m not fucking deaf, Ed! You just said Chrissy was gonna kill you!”

“Yes, but that’s not- Fuck! That’s not what I meant! She’s dating Jason Carver, for fuck’s sake!”

“It’s okay if you like her, she’s fucking perfect-” she babbled, fat tears leaving tracks on her cheeks.

“You’re fucking perfect! God, fuck, this is not what I-” Eddie took the clothes out of her arms and threw them into the living room, pulling her into his arms again.

“Eddie, what the fuck?!” she shrieked, trying to get away from him but he held on tight, throwing her onto his shoulder and sitting her down onto the kitchen counter.

“I made Kool-Aid!”

“What? I don’t want fucking Kool-Aid-”

“Just stop arguing!” he yelled, effectively shutting her up. “I made apple Kool-Aid.”

“...I love apple Kool-Aid,” she said, for lack of a better response.

“I know,” he said, leaning back and looking at her sitting between his arms, palms on the cold surface of his kitchen countertop. “That’s why I keep buying it. For you.”

An ugly sob bubbled up out of her throat and she hid her face in her hands. She wasn’t strong enough to keep fighting with him, and when he hugged her again, fingers tangling back under her ears, she simply bowed her head and cried harder. Eddie kissed her hair and held her, letting her release all the pent up emotions that were swirling in her mind. When she breathed a little bit easier, he looked at her, drying her tears with his thumbs.

“Can I trust you to stay here while I get the Kool-Aid?” he asked, softly.

Dottie nodded, so he moved away from her to get the pitcher out of the fridge. He filled a mug first, watching her legs swinging lightly back and forth while she sniffled and picked at her nails, and stopped before filling the next one. She saw him frown and look around the kitchen before finding what he was looking for: a yellow ceramic mug with a gnome playing the accordion on the front. A couple of weeks ago, the teens had been studying in the trailer on the small table in the kitchen, and Dottie had mentioned to Wayne she was gonna get him a hat with her college logo when she was in Michigan so he could add it to his collection. He’d glowed at that, joking that he was gonna tell everyone his niece was a genius and that he’d leave her her favorite mug in his will in return. The two of them had spent around 30 minutes going through every mug until she decided on one, all while Eddie worked on his homework with a dumb smile on his face. She’d picked a yellow mug with gnome playing the accordion on the front, the very same mug Eddie was now gently putting into her hands filled with apple Kool-Aid he allegedly kept buying because he knew it was her fave flavor.

They sipped their juice in silence until Dottie calmed down, holding onto the mug with both hands for comfort. Eddie stood there, waiting for her to say anything and when it became clear she was not gonna be the first one to talk, he put his mug down and turned to her, pulling on the hem of her borrowed boxers.

“Hey,” he said, ducking his head down to look her into the eyes. She made a small sound of acknowledgment but kept staring at the liquid between her hands. “I’m not dating anyone.”

“Okay.”

“I don’t like Chrissy,” he kept going.

“You don’t have to explain anything to me.”

“Yes, I do. I really fucking do,” he took her mug out of her hands and ducked a bit more. “Dot, look at me. Please.”

“Eddie, it’s fine-”

“I’m kind of insanely in love with you.”

“What?” Dottie breathed out, eyes widening.

“Darling, I haven’t been able to even look at anyone else since the day I met you. I’m so fucking obsessed with you it’s actually embarrassing,” he smiled at her, finally hitting her with the full force of his confession.

“You… you like me?”

“Mhm,” he nodded, lifting her hand and kissing her gauze covered knuckles. “Chrissy has been helping me plan how to ask you out. We’re not secretly dating, she knows I’m crazy about you.”

“Oh. Sorry, I didn’t know,” Dottie murmured, ashamed that she’d jumped the gun with her conclusions.

“You couldn’t know, that was the whole point,” he chuckled. “I was gonna ask you out after graduation, I wanted to have our diplomas and everything but then you kissed me and… you’re awfully impatient, has anyone ever told you that?”

“God, I’m an idiot,” she laughed, hitting her forehead with her palm. “How long had you been planning that?”

“Since around your birthday,” he admitted, and she groaned. “I would have asked you earlier but I wanted to set things straight before, y’know? I wanted to graduate first, maybe get a job, I dunno… Give you what you deserve. Instead you get… this,” he waved his hand around. “Sorry.”

“Eddie, I’m so in love with you, it’s not even funny. What are you talking about?”

“What?”

“Oh my god, we’re both idiots!” Dottie groaned again, and he laughed in disbelief.

“You’re in love with me?”

“Yes! Why did you think I kissed you?!”

“I mean, I kinda figured out you liked me, but love, darling, that’s… That’s a lot.”

“You just said you are “kinda insanely in love” with me, what do you mean it’s a lot?” she looked at him like he had just told her the sky was green.

“Well, yeah, but- that’s different! I’m me!”

“Okay, what the hell does that mean?”

“I don’t know, I just- fuck, I love you and I really, really want to kiss you right now. Would that be okay, darling? Can I kiss you?”

She shook her head at him like he had just said the stupidest thing on Earth and wrapped her arms around him, bringing him forward and pressing their lips together again. Eddie laughed against her mouth, hands coming up to cup the sides of her jaw, thumbs rubbing circles into her skin. They kissed with no hurry and no other motives than to just kiss, savoring the moment like a cold sip of water after a long race. There were no more places to hide, no more shadows lurking in the background. It was just them under the mismatched light bulbs in the Munson kitchen, two mugs and a pitcher filled with Kool-Aid, and limbs tangling with one another, scratching an itch that had once seemed impossible to relieve.

Eddie moved his lips from hers to her cheek, up her nose and eyelids until he reached her forehead and stayed there, just breathing in and basking in the knowledge that they’d jumped off a cliff together and had landed on the other side unscathed. There were so many conversations to be had, so many things to be said, but this was more than okay for him now. This was enough, and for the first time in his whole life, he was enough. Dottie’s hands moved under his shirt, lightly running her short nails over his skin, the motion calming and grounding him. He was hers, and she was his, and there was nothing else that mattered anymore. The waters were calm. The locked padlocks remained in place, but the keys weren’t forgotten or hidden anymore. She felt at peace in a way she had never once felt before, knowing that no matter what came next, they would face it together. She yawned once, burrowing further into his skin, and he chuckled.

“Wanna go to bed now?” he asked, softly.

“Yes, please,” she replied.

Eddie helped her off the counter and let her get comfy in his room while he finished getting ready for bed, turning all the lights off and brushing his teeth with a dazed expression on his face. He found her tucked in on the left side of his bed, the one closest to the wall and realized that he could get used to this so easily. He was sure that once she went home the next day, he’d have trouble falling asleep until she was back next to him, nuzzling into his chest and wearing his clothes. They cuddled in silence, soft touches in the darkness, just exploring skin and calming rapid heartbeats with innocent caresses that revealed just how much they’d longed for this. There would be time for bolder actions, but tonight they just wanted to hold each other tight and never let go. Eddie, however, had one more question to ask before sleep could whisk them away to Dreamland.

“Darling?”

“Mhm?”

“I don’t want to, like, ruin the moment, but… what happens now?”

“Dunno. What do you want to happen?” she asked, moving her leg on top of his so he could shuffle closer to her.

“Can we maybe not tell people this happened so I can ask you out like I planned?” he said, shyly. “I just… I want to do things right with you. I don’t want to fuck this up.”

“You’re not fucking anything up, Ed. But sure, we can pretend this didn’t happen and I’ll act surprised when you ask me out,” she rolled her eyes playfully.

“No, no, that’s not what I meant,” he squeezed her closer. “I meant it more like… not telling the guys? You can tell your Dad if you want, though.”

“How about this?” she said, reaching up and kissing his jaw sweetly. “We don’t tell anyone anything, and my Dad doesn’t get an aneurysm every time he sees you. Sound good?”

“You want to lie to your Dad?”

“Not forever. We can tell him before I leave for college. You’re gonna come see me, right?” Dottie asked, hopeful.

“Baby, Michigan is only three hours away. They’re gonna think I’m your roommate with how often I’m gonna be there,” he pecked her hairline.

“Baby?”

“Just trying it on. D’you like it?”

“I love it. And I love you.”

“Fuck, I’ll never get tired of that. I love you,” he chuckled, leaning in to kiss her. “Okay, we won’t tell anyone so your Dad doesn’t murder me.”

“I have one condition though.”

“Okay?”

“I still get to kiss you when we’re alone.”

“You just want me to be your dirty little secret, don’t you?” Eddie joked, poking her side.

“I’ll be yours too if that helps,” she said, cheekily.

“Oh, don’t tempt me with a good time, princess,” he said with a mischievous tone. “Who knows? Might be fun to sneak around all summer.”

Half an hour later, when they were finally falling asleep between soft kisses and whispered sweet nothings, they both agreed that a little bit of teenage disobedience might just be the missing piece they didn’t know they were looking for to complete their perfect summer before officially being adults. After all, it always looked so much fun in movies, right?

taglist (comment below or send me an ask if you want to be added!): @munsonology @kurdtbean @every1lovesanunderdog @eg-dr3amer3

[yalocalfanficaddict]

*vibrating to the point of combusting over the need to write something and title it with a Hozier song/lyric*

Ayo, new music obsession just dropped! Here's a random prompt list of Hozier stuff because my mind is rotting! Anything with Pt 1 and Pt 2 beside it, is just complimentary titles for potential series titles.

Take me to church:

Giggle At A Funeral

Born Sick

Like A Dog At The Shrine

Offer Me Your Deathless Death

Take Me To Church (A lil obvious with this one, but just imagine the Corpse Bride AU's)

My Lover's The Sunlight (Pt 1)

She Demands A Sacrifice (Pt 2)

This is Hungry Work

No Masters Or Kings (Pt 1)

When The Ritual Begins (Pt 2)

THERE IS NO SWEETER INNOCENCE THAN OUR GENTLE SIN (THE ANGST FOR THIS ONE *folds*)

Let Me Give You My Life

Angel of Small Death and the Codeine Scene:

Toying Somewhere Between Love And Abuse (Please just hit me with the back of a metal chair) (and by metal chair I mean angst)

The Wretched And Joyful

Shaking The Wings Of Their Terrible Youth (Arch-angels? Anybody?)

Freshly Disowned...Frozen Devotion

Sweetened Breath And Tongue So Mean (Removed pronouns for inclusivity)

Feeling More Human

I Lay My Heart Down (Pt 1)

It's Bloody It's Raw, But I Swear It's Sweet (Pt 2)

Wonder If Better Now Having Survived (Pt 1)

I'm Alive (Pt 2)

Jackie and Wilson:

From Behind The Red In My Eyes (Literally any character with red eyes will rule this title)

No Better Version Of Me

Most Familiar of Swine (Enemies to Lovers WHERE YOU AT??)

Wretched And Divine (I don't watch Good Omens, but think of the potential!!!!)

Laughing Away Through My Feeble Disguise

Found Me Just In Time

My Mid-Youth Crisis All Said And Done (Pt 1)

Never Felt So Young (Pt 2)

Call Me "Baby"

Hands Through My Hair

Soothe Me Daily

Raise 'Em On Rhythm And Blues

It'd Be Great To Find A Place We Could Escape Sometime

Dead And Buried In The Yard Outside

Watch The World Go By (Pt 1)

Watch It Burn And Rust (Pt 2)

It Wasn't For Us (Pt 3????)

Cut Clean From The Dream (Childhood Friends To Strangers???)

Let My Mind Reset

Looking Up From A Cigarette

Someone New:

Don't Take This The Wrong Way

You Knew Who I Was (Pt 1)

Every Step I Ran To You (Pt 2)

Electing Strange Perfections

Just A Little Ol' Little Bit

Everyday With Someone New (Here me out...Soulmate AU)

(There's An) Art To Life's Distractions (Pt 1)

The Art Of Scraping Through (Pt 2)

Some Like To Imagine

I Guess Any Thrill Will Do (Grumpy x Sunshine adventure!)

My Heart's Already Sinned

How Pure, How Sweet A Love

'Cause God Knows I Fall In Love (Denial for their feelings >>>)

The Stranger The Better

To Be Alone:

Never Feel Too Good In Crowds (Angst? Trauma Recovery?)

Crude And Proud Creatures Baying

All I've Ever Done Is Hide

When You Kill The Lights And Kiss My Eyes (FORBIDDEN LOVERS!!!!!)

I Feel Like A Person For A Moment Of My Life (Pt 1)

But You Don't Know What Hell You Put Me Through (Pt 2)

Kiss The Skin That Crawls From You

Oh, To Be Alone With You (Pt 1)

Questions I Can't Ask (Pt 2)

At Last, The Worst Is Over (BANANA FISH IF THEY HAD A HAPPY ENDING) (I'M SOBBING)

Not A Trace Of Me Would Argue (Whipped characters be like)

We Should Run Away

From Eden:

Something So Tragic About You (Please combine the next few lines as Pt 1s, 2s, 3s, etc. as you see fit!)

Something So Magic About You

Something Lonesome About You

Something Wholesome About You

Get Closer To Me

No Time For Me

You're Familiar Like My Mirror Years Ago

Idealism Sits In Prison

Chivalry Fell On It's Sword

Innocence Died Screaming

Something So Wretched About This (Hozier's favourite word unlocked lol)

Where To Begin?

What A Sin

To Hang From A Tree

In a Week (Ft. Karen Cowley):

I Have Never Known Peace

Like These Insects That Feast On Me

Our Heartbeats Becoming Slow

(We Lay Here) For Years Or For Hours (HANAHAKI WRITERS PLEASE HEAR ME OUT)

Two Corpses We Were (Pt1)

Two Corpses I Saw (Pt 2)

I'd Be Home With You (Could be used as a Hurt/Comfort or a Hurt/No Comfort)

The Slumber That Creeps To Me

I Have Never Known Color (Soulmate AU!!)

Flesh Calmly Going Cold

Your Hand In My Hand

So Still And Discreet

When The Weather Gets Hot

After The Foxes Have Known Our Taste (Pt 1)

After The Raven Has Had It's Say (Pt 2)

Sedated:

Just A Little Rush

To Feel Dizzy, To Derail The Mind

My Heart's In Atrophy

Nursing On A Poison That Never Stung (Pt 1)

Our Teeth And Lungs Are Lined From The Scum Of It (Pt 2)

We Are Deaf (Pt 1)

We Are Numb (Pt 2)

Something Isn't Right (Trapped in an Alternate Universe, anyone?)

Little Words

Slaves To Any Semblance Of Touch (Touched Starved Character's are gonna have a field day with this one lol)

We Should Quit But We Love It So Much (Never meant to be romances >>>)

Come And Save Me From It? (THE QUESTION MARK IS WHAT MAKES ME GO FERAL AHSBWBEDKSI)

Drag Me Away From It

Work Song:

Workin' On Empty

I Just Think About My Baby

I Could Barely Eat

Nothing Sweeter Than My Baby

Once From The Cherry Tree

Give Me Toothaches Just From Kissin' Me

When My Time Comes Around (Pt 1)

Lay Me Gently In The Cold Dark Earth (Pt 2) (THE ANGSSTTTTT)

Three Days On Drunken Sin (We aaaall know the smut writers will have a field day with this one, haha!)

An Empty Crib

No Grave Can Hold My Body Down

What My Hands And My Body Done

If The Lord Don't Forgive Me

Heaven And Hell Were Words To Me

Like Real People Do:

Why Were You Digging? (Pt 1)

What Did You Bury (Pt 2)

Those Hands Pulled Me From The Earth

(I Will Not Ask You) Where You Came From

Kiss Like Real People Do (AHKUDHUSdHBE JUST IMAGINE THE POTENTIAL-)

Eyes Always Seeking

In Some Sad Way, I Already Know

It Will Come Back:

You Know Better, Babe

Talk To It Like That (My mind went STRAIGHT to the gutter when I read it out of context)

Don't Give It A Hand, Offer A Soul

Leave It To The Land

Don't Let It In With No Intentions To Keep It

It Will Come Back

Smile At Me Like That

Hold Me

I'm Something Else When I See You (Myyy heaaart!!! Grumpy x Sunshine title for sure!!)

You Don't Understand, You Should Never Know

How Easy You Are To Need

It Can't Be Unlearned

The Warmth Of Your Doorways

Oh, Please, Give Me Mercy No More (WHUMP POTENTIAL!!!)

A Kindness You Can't Afford

Howling Outside Your Door

Foreigner's God:

Moved In Shameless Wonder

The Perfect Creature Rarely Seen

When The Land Was Godless And Free

Into The Empty Parts Of Me

My Heart Is Heavy

Always A Well Dressed Fraud

Never For Me

The Purest Expression Of Grief (HEAR ME OUT!! HEAR ME OUT!!)

Tender Charm

The Broken Love I Made To Them (Changed pronouns for inclusivity!)

Foreign To Me

Cherry Wine:

Eyes And Words Are So Icy

Like Rum On A Fire

Hot And Fast And Angry (Mad smut mad smut mad smut mad smut mad-)

I Walk My Days On A Wire

Oh Mama, Don't Fuss Over Me

The Blood Is Rare And Sweet As Cherry Wine (*glances at the Twilight fandom nervously*)

The Sheets Of Some Other

But I Want It, It's A Crime

Not Around Most Of The Time

I'm Their's And They're Mine (Inclusivity!!)

Fight And Fury Is Fiery

Loves Like Sleep To The Freezing

Sweet And Right And Merciful

It's Worth It (Pt 1)

It's Divine (Pt 2)

In The Woods Somewhere:

My Head Was Warm, My Skin Was Soaked

When I Awoke, The Moon Still Hung

The Darkness Hummed

I Prayed My Mind Be Good To Me

Into The Trees With Empty Hands

His Bone Exposed, His Hind Was Lame, I Raise A Stone To End His Pain (A lil long, but I think it sounds nice✨)

What Caused The Wound?

To Save A Life I Didn't Have

Forgot All Prayers Of Joining You

My Dearest Love, I'm Not Done Yet

Something In The Woods Somewhere

Run:

Rare Is This Love, Keep It Covered (FORBIDDEN LOVERS!!! I'LL DIE ON THIS HILL OF THIS BEING THE BEST TROPE)

Run To Me, Lover

Until You Feel Your Lungs Bleeding (HANAHAKI?? HANAHAKI!!)

To Be Twisted By Something (A knife? A rope? Possibilities are endless!)

A Shame Without A Sin

Rushing To The Shore To Meet

[fulloffencekurooishotterthanyou]

Hello, I was wondering if you could write a little comfort pet loss with Suga? I recently lost my dog named meatball and was wondering if you could write something? I would greatly appreciated it. I love your writing by the way.

Hello there Kayla, thanks so much for the request. I’m so sorry about your dog and replying to this request so late :( I hope you feel better soon <3

Contents: Sugawara x gn reader, fluff, comfort, death of a pet, 0.5k

In life, loss was brutal. You knew that perfectly well. You'd lost your phone for more than forty-eight hours, a gift from your boyfriend when you hadn't meant to and even lost friendships over the years. But as you sat in the quiet of your living room, you couldn’t help but think this loss was the worst of them all. This was the kind of loss you didn't see coming, the air around you light and airy until a formidable weight collapsed on top of you, knocking the breath out of you. A burden so heavy it didn't feel real. "Y/N, I'm home!" Sugawara's cheerful voice rang out as you remained sitting on the floor, legs leaden as they refused to let you get up. You didn't dare call out, knowing how weak and feeble your voice would sound. "Darling~ Where are yo- Y/N? What are you doing on the floor?" "Hi," you smiled, tears welling up in the corner of your eyes. "I was just thinking about something," There was an evident choke in your voice, and Sugawara sat down beside you, holding out his arms. "You wanna talk about what's wrong? Or shall we just sit here for a second?" "Sit," you whispered, "please." "Alright, let's do that then," he murmured, placing a kiss on your temple as he embraced you. Ever so gently, he brushed strands of hair out of your face, noticing the way you held back your tears. "Hey, darling, can you look at me for a second?" he asked, and you wordlessly did so. "You're allowed to cry, baby. You can do that," he reassured you, "you have every right to be upset right now, so don't bottle up those precious feelings of yours, alright?" "O-okay," you mumbled, feeling streaks of liquid salt run down your cheeks. "Sorry," you blurted out, not knowing why you felt apologetic. "Don't be," he hushed soothingly, rubbing your back softly as a sob broke out from your throat, your body trembling as you cried. "Oh, my love, it's going to be okay," Sugawara breathed, hugging you even tighter. "I'm right here, darling. Right here when you need me."

And later, when you had stopped crying, the two of you remained on the carpeted floor, relishing in each other's company. "My dog died," you finally choked out, "I got a phone call from the vet saying Meatball was going to be let down," "Darling, I am so sorry," Sugawara gasped, his hazel brown eyes glossing over at the news. "That is awful," "S'not your fault Kōshi. I'm just sad I wasn't there at the end," you sighed, bringing your fingertips to the bottom of your eyes, and rubbing your eyelids gently. Your eyes were undoubtedly going to be swollen tomorrow. "I'm still sad for you, Y/N," he kissed you slowly, warmth spreading through your body as he pulled away. "I know it'll hurt for some time," he began, looking at you with such sincerity, you nearly started crying again. "But I'm always here if you want to talk about it and I'll be here as you go through it," he kissed you again, his hair tickling your skin. "Thank you, Kō. I love you," "I love you too, darling. Shall we depart from this beloved floor and get something to eat? You can show me some photos of Meatball if you'd like," "I don't know, I think I've grown quite attached to the living room floor," you teased, standing up as Sugawara held out his hand to you. "Perhaps I'll just have to make you dinner and deliver it to you personally," he joked back, pressing his lips to your cheek. "How charming," you laughed, noticing how a smile spread across your boyfriend's features. "Even through sadness, I don't think I'll ever stop loving you, Y/N." Sugawara commented, taking your hand as he lead you to the kitchen.

[kitmoas]

If you had the means (whether DIY or paying someone else to do it) to have physical hardbound copies of five fics from any fandom, what would they be?

I just want you to know how long I had this sitting in my drafts trying to figure out which ones i would want.

It got long so I put it under a cut for the sake of your dashes lol

Here on Tumblr: I have to put my 3 comfort AUs first of course

The Widow AU by @scarlettwlw truly is something that I dont think I will ever get over. Every single little answer blurb or whatever makes my heart so happy. I literally re-read at least some part of it daily and if I had a book of it--that thing would never leave my person. I would bring it everwhere with me. It would be that book that i would have to keep buying again because I would read it so much that I would destroy it just by overuse.

The Honey AU by @caroldantops personally is a world that feels so real. I love it and I don't think I have to explain too much why. If I had a book of this I feel like it would be one of those things that like I would keep under my pillow and get a second to display forever. I just think reading this would be like coming home? It's just so cozy and just like warm.

My Soul To Keep AU by @maximotts is literally something that I am...very normal about. When i say that anything motts texts me i turn it into angel!wanda, I swear I'm so happy that she doesn't get sick of it because if i could just like get a physical copy of all the lore and every random thought for that world.. I would be able to die happy. Would it be my lil bedtime story? Yes.

the plum tree blossoms even in winter by @peachyteabuck listen..the way I continue to go back to this single fic. I dont do that often, I usually prefer to go back and re-read AUs or something longer BUT this damn one-shot has me in a chokehold STILL. I just need mulitple of those lil mini pocket books, so I can just keep one everywhere and read it everytime i just yknow have the urge to lay in a heated dog bed.

The High Stakes series by @temptationsbrew was one of the things that brought me to Tumblr and to say I wouldn't want that in physical book form would be a lie. I have spent entirely too many hours reading it, and just the 3 main parts are literal perfection. It still to this day is one of the best pieces of fanfiction that I have ever read and I need to be able to just whip that story out no matter where I am.

I DO have some fics that really impacted me that arent on Tumblr, and aren't Marvel but none more than this heartbreakingly gorgeous fic. I periodically read this probably 3 or 4 times a year and it still destroys my heart each time I read it. i remember finding it RIGHT after the author had finished writing it, and I binged it for the first time that night.

Colors by evershadow I....the way this fic has had my heart for 12 YEARS and its one of those things that I can't just casually read. Like if I even open the tab I'm reading the entire thing. I can't put it down, no matter how many times I've read it. It literally rips my heart apart and I hate myself every single time i read it. I literally sob to the point of not being able to breathe each time I read it like its the first.

[olystreetpunk]

Okay.

Full explanation now that I know they're okay and are on their way back to camp.

One of the young adult shelter kids has this dog that looks almost exactly like my companion's dog, like scarily similar. The only difference is that this dog is SUPER fucking skinny, like his ribs jut a solid 2 or 3 inches past his stomach. And my companion told them "hey, you're dog doesn't eat enough" and offered them some dog food. Ya know, like a nice person. So he went to go get some alcohol to hang out with ghe Rosie's kids. And when he came back this fucking bitchy ass shelter kid threw a fit going "don't tell me I don't feed my dog enough!" And they anyd the rest of the Rosie's brats ran my companion off the block, threatening to both fight him and call the cops. He called me crying, super upset about how the dog was treated and the fucking shelter kids turning on him as soon as he brought them booze.

So a few hours later I get this call out of nowhere and I say "hello?" But my companion didn't answer and all I could hear was the sound of fighting and yelling, and the call ended after like 30 seconds.

So I gave it a few minutes to let him get out of the fight, hoping he would win and call me back after, but he doesn't so I call him. It rings all the way through. I give it another 8 minutes waiting and call again. Straight to voicemail. I keep up this pattern for like an hour, getting nothing. I'm sitting in my tent in the woods sobbing my eyes out praying he's okay and trying to find someone, anyone to talk to cuz I'm freaking out.

Then I get a text from this shelter guy me and my companion have hooked up with before (detail relevant to explain my shock, we were on VERY friendly terms) saying "I'm sorry you have to be with that psychopath" and that my companion "made a homie have a panic attack and choke on their own vomit". I try to get him to tell me where my companion is but he's being bitchy about it. Then I get a call from a number l don't recognize, answer it of course, and my companion tells me he got jumped and that they stole his phone.

[untamedyouth]

12/16/23

3 AM

How ironic is it that I wrote an entry less than 24 hours ago saying how so many things have happened— good, bad, everything in between, but I was too tired to discuss all of it.

Tonight, right before going to bed, I started to debrief with my mom.

I asked her how she had her day planned for tomorrow, and then I began to tell her mine.

After saying all that I intended to do; my dad suggests I take my dog Talulah for a walk.

I completely understand my dad meant no hard in this suggestion, but because I have felt pressured to be active in the past due to my weight and laziness.

I wanted to explain to him how that suggestion makes me uncomfortable for that reason BUT I know he doesn’t mean it maliciously, I only wanted to talk about how it made me feel…. Especially knowing that he meant no harm. I know it wasn’t necessary to tell him, but I am trying to create a bond between he and I where we understand each other… and the only way to do that is by talking about our feelings.

But upon trying to tell him, I didn’t make it past “daddy, it kinda makes me uncomfortable when..” before he threw his hands up in the air out of obvious frustration. Upon that reaction, I react hurt and angrily “seriously? I can’t even communicate with you??”

I tried to be so gentle, I wasn’t angry or upset, I tried my best to ease into what I was about to say but that still wasn’t good enough.

They say they want to talk to me, but when I try to talk to them it seems as though I’m trying to start an argument.

Mom intervenes and we all agree to stop the fight.

Still feeling very upset, I go upstairs to my mother and I ask for validation that that just happened.

I started to complain about daddy, too cruelly I will admit. … It’s only because I love him so much. I wish I was born a boy so then both of my parents would like me.

I took my complaining too far, I should have known better. Here I am bad mouthing her husband.

It turns volatile. Screaming ensues, threats, sobbing, cruel things said between all three of us, but ultimately I take the brunt of it.

I’m not trying to live in the past… I only wanted to communicate and explain, It wasn’t an attack, because I was well aware that he didn’t mean it badly. It wasn’t until his reaction triggered my reaction to him.

I should have known better. I am the one in therapy, not them.

As I sit sobbing in the corner of my parents bedroom, I am told that; they are bending over backwards for me, they’re taking care of my chores for me, they are doing everything they can to change for me, and yet I still continue to attack them even though they’re doing everything they best they can.

But I know that already… I just wanted to talk..

Once I realized that it doesn’t matter how I perceived the interaction, I was wrong no matter what; thus I forced myself to get up and allow them to comfort me.

That was the hardest thing in the world. After hearing about all the responsibilities I am neglecting because I am so mentally ill, only to be hugged, comforted, and told “I’m sorry for what I said, I didn’t mean it, I was just angry”

I realized that the only way I’ll be a good girl in the eyes of my parents is I maintain a happy, pleasant persona, and bottle up any and all emotions to appear appropriate.

This realization made me spiral even further into my darkness. If I’m unable to make my parents happy, why am I even here? Why was I born. To be a burden on my parents?

I tried to kill myself in the shower with a broken razor. I was too much of a coward to press deep enough to actually draw blood.

I am left now only with evidence of the attempt.

My mom was furious when she saw I attempted and immediately began angrily telling me to get my shit and that we’re going to the hospital.

I did not want to go. I wanted to die. I didn’t want to be abandoned again at the hospital, only to come home 48 hours later because I was behaving perfectly normal in the hospital.

My triggers, are at home.

My mom tells me that she can’t live like this anymore, worrying about me constantly. Whatever remains of my heart, that statement alone shattered into it another million pieces.

Partly because I hurt my mama so much, and partly because I don’t want to live like this either. I didn’t ask for this. I don’t want to be like this. I never wanted to hurt anyone.

Without my family, I would be nothing. If I am so bad that I need to be put in a residential, then I will cut all contact. The last thing I want to be is both a financial burden and a disappointment as a daughter.

I wish I was never born.

M.R

[different-names]

.///////3.26.23

<!searchDIRECTORY: ..////[10.08.22][10.13.22]

../me and my cats are all missing hair.

we are all losing our hair. it is falling out in chunks.

we are moving around, moving through. we are all battered and bruised and missing you.

me and our cats are all sitting here quietly in the dark.

we are lying down bathed in red light.

../invalid command. please reenter.

something i keep calling you rhymes with your name but two of the letters are different, and i don't think your name has any apostrophes, at least none that i'm aware of.

me and our cats recognize your name and your voice.

i don't know if we call enough. i do not think we are calling you enough.

on our next birthday i want to name a star after you but i'm not sure which name i should use. maybe it would be too silly and meta to name a star night but maybe it would be worse to name it sister, lover, friend.

../invalid directory path. this file is missing.

i don't know. i'm not the philosopher. i'm the nurse.

../describe me a god and in vivid detail i will show you how it bleeds.

../describe me a god and i will slow and mathematically show you how to debride and sterilize and suture its wounds. there is no longer space in my brain for magic.

i closed it down and am not painting my bedroom walls any colors. i am for now strictly interested in the color of my nail beds and traffic lights. i am now strictly interested in the color of your nail beds.

i am meeting god and she is human and she is telling me how she got sober in a dark living room over the course of a week with a breathalyzer on 3 hours of sleep pacing around the kitchen sobbing down the line of a telephone walking into that room knowing i would hear you say you don't want to be here is the hardest thing i've ever done.

i want to tell her you weren't alone then. i was there too.

../[she is telling me she woke up in a hospital bed on valium and drove to florida with her mom. she is forcing me to stop talking until i have at least one bite of pizza. she is in finals week and hates that she can't fly out to be here. she is serving me a venti passion tea lemonade as we walk shivering back out into the sunlight.]

she is certain only that she was not relieved you were not lucid enough to say it. she is certain only that she was not relieved that you recognized her face but not her hand on your knee.

../chekhov's step one.

[i have done it, ad infinitum. full stop.]

if you are in a play and life is unmanageable then invariably inevitably eventually the gun will go off.

i am moving by around and through and i am being battered and bruised.

there's a fishhook in your skin and you're sweating. there are rotting hot dog slices in the tackle box and you are sweating. there is lake water dripping from our clothes onto the floor and you are sweating and we don't have any ceiling fans. i've never seen you come so hard and at first i think i hurt you.

me (yours) and our cats are missing hair and i tell you, and you tell me you're missing hair too. i don't know if you know exactly what i mean.

i can't stop thinking about the fishhook, about you sweating. [you kicked the blankets off and you're shivering and i don't know why i think it looks so christlike. i think that's my name. do we have the same name too?].

../the data has been corrupted. unable to parse. command function not found. system shutdown will occur in 1 second(s) unless cancelled. shutting down system hard drives. please wait.

../

../unable to perform system startup. please wait a few seconds before retrying.

../

../

../error 404: file not found file not found file not found file not found file not found

../

../i think maybe i'm not complete yet. that maybe it's too soon.

but i do know now that i need to come home and i need to be beside you.

../does that mean the same thing? ["i look forward to getting to meet you [again]"].

[god! it's happening again, that it's you, and you're someone else, and this time it isn't grief! god. god! there's no one to miss, nothing to grieve!]

[until when? until when?...]

and being complete is when i can accept that it's a choice you'll have to make, and accept what you choose.

<!--for all the time i spent longing for you to get better, for us to get better. for all the time i spent trying to keep things from falling apart. for all the time i spent flat on my back praying something out there keeps you from falling off the roof. [is that my 'in' to 'get god'?] scrubbing blood from the cut on your face off the railing off the bathroom floor and failing to fully remove the stain.--/>

three months later you ask me to help shave your face and you're frustrated, don't understand why i'm too careful, why i'm too scared to press hard enough, why my hands are shaking so hard. "i'm drunk. are you surprised?" "no."

there's some small part of me that could be bitter but i honestly can't be upset. there's no ethic in the concept of debt, no exchange plan, as romantic as it sounds in someone else's mouth.

there's no one who knows what this is between us except us, maybe not even us.

me and my cats are all missing. we have gone missing and are seeking towards home.

[sunnyxnala]

Monday, 10/24/22

8:20am - I woke up and hastily got ready and rushed over to my EEBIOL discussion at la kretz. on my way there, i completely WIPED OUT on my scooter while going down the hill by gardenia. i was in the bike lane, abiding by scooter and traffic laws ok, and then this guy just STEPPED OFF DA SIDEWALK TO WALK IN THE BIKE LANE LIKE DUDE?? and he didn't even LOOK bruh mans wast just on his phone pls. it was too late, i was already too close to stop from hitting him, so i swerved and our shoulder bumped. he didnt take any damage, but i took the hardest fall and tumble oh my god. my scooter went flying to the left side of the rode and i went flying down the middle, tumbling and rolling for a bit before eventually falling on my back and skidding to a stop. i threw my head back and lie there in the middle of the road just full of defeat. truly a "ok universe just take me out already" kind of moment. the guy whom i bumped into was like, "oh my gawd are you okay???" and offered his hand to help me up but i was so angery at him and i was like, "yeah im fine >:(" and got up by myself. and then he kept asking me if i was still okay and "how i didn't see him" and at that point im like dude just go away man T_T

9:15am - i made it to my discussion, albeit late. my ta was very understanding though and allowed me to take our weekly quiz after discussion. i really love how she always brings her dog, he loooooves me frfr bc he always comes by, jumps up, and sits on my lap for the entire discussion. he's saur cute but saur stinky oh my god he always farts on me and i get paranoid tht my peers think that it's ME

10:00am - i hung out and did some work at kerckoff, and that's when i first noticed the pain in my footsies from tumbling down this morning. i didn't think it was too bad, but i definitely felt like my foot was bleeding. when i got back to my dorm, i found out that my legs are all bruised and scratched up and my left toenail is cracked in half T_T L for nala nation.

11:30am - after bandaging myself up, my boyfriend and i met together to grab brunch from the study. we both got chocolate hazelnut waffles and they were so gas <3

1:30pm - i accompanied my boyfriend to his office hour for a bit because i wanted to see him program his little robot thing

2:00pm - i headed out to my ls30b lecture! my boyfriend also accompanied me which i thought was pretty sweet. i also volunteered to answer a question today and i got it RIGHT LETS GOOOO i felt so good after that B) totally not behind in this class or anything nah nope all good, i know my content ha ha...

3:00pm - we headed back to the hill, where i began working on submitting some assignments and sending emails. it still takes me f o r e v e r to send out a well-written email, and i wish i could write them out more easily ;-; i will admit that i feel like i've gotten so much better at writing emails cold but it is still really difficult to write a thoughtful email in a short amount of time. it typically takes me 30min to write an email now, which is not too bad.

7:00pm - i got ready for a meeting, packed my things, and grabbed my friend's belated birthday gift. i met up with some friends who were also on their way to the same meeting at de neve plaza, where we were just preparing and ensuring that we were ready to go.

8:00pm-10:00pm - had a meeting!

11:00pm - after i got back to my dorm, i had another meeting with my alumni mentor to talk more about careers and life after college! very helpful slay

12:00am - i was saur exhausted i ended up crying sobs i am such a crybaby but it's okay it felt very healing. overall, today was... a 5/10... yeah...

xoxo nala

[artanddaddyissues]

The M6 with their children <3

IM SOBBING THIS IS SO CUTE

Heads up: MC text is yellow, PURE fluff, they/them pronouns for the kiddos, the Li's partners have fem pronouns <3

If you want some more baby content, go here! I will fuel your baby fever 😩

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

- EXTREMELY loving parent <3

- if you thought Asra was caring and worried towards you, just imagine them with your kid.

- "You SCRAPED your KNEE? MC! OUR CHILD IS DYING!" "Asra no-"

- frantic healing spells and healing magic are always on the ready, since your child is very, very curious.

- constantly checking up on their child, making sure that kid is living their best life.

- Asra raises them with magic and holds back tears when they nail a new spell.

- "Yes! I'm so proud of you, that was perfect!" "Can I try another? "Oh my- I could cry." "But you are crying-"

- Absolutely IN AWE with the life he helped to create

- Doesn't believe that somebody as... messy... as himself, could create something so perfect.

- "Look at that! they've got my eyes."

- Julian is the proudest, of proud dads. he will take any chance he gets to boast about his kid

- "MC! GET OVER HERE THEY'RE STANDING UP!"

- Records everything in a notebook, filling it with drawings and pages and pages of notes, studying behaviour and keeping memories.

- Since the baby, he's put himself on strict schedule. He gave himself tasks and laid out everything he'll do with the kid up until the age of 16.

- "Hey papa, can we buy a dog?" "Well, your mama will probably say no." "So, then we dont buy one?" "You're right, we steal one!" "ILYA."

- MOTHER NADIA >

- Ultimate nurturer

- She will spoil this kid rotten and you have no say in this.

- She will put them in the best schools in all of Vesuvia

- Will teach them how to ride horses

- Will teach them how to create their own magical gate while you teach them magic

- When the baby was born, she secretly started planning all their birthday gifts up until they were an adult and began a photo album

- Nadia would take her kid on many royal engagements, to show them what it takes to be a good leader

- "But mom..." "I'm not hearing it now dear, we're already on the road. Plus, these nobles frustrate me so later, we can talk about them over tea." "Okay, that doesn't sound so bad now."

- “hey kid come here” “Dad I have a name-” “yeah but kid is easier. Want to go bother mom?” “Absolutely I do.”

- They are your worst enemies. Some Godforsaken tag team of dueling in the halls, painting on the empty walls, pranking the staff, swimming in the fountain and so, so much more.

- This kid grows up half you and half Lucio

- He doesn't waste a minute to start teaching the kid how to survive in the wild, like his mother did.

- Many people, including yourself thought that Lucio would be careless and teach his kid how to party first but it turns out that something in him changed with a kid.

- "My mama told me to never run from musk bears but they smell awful so take it from me and run." "Oka-" "Always find out which way the wind is blowing, it might mess up your shots." "Alrigh-" "when you're in the cold, don't stop moving. Keep moving, keep your hands close to you, make sure you maintain a-" "Dad please... It's literally summer."

- The equivalent of mother nature to her child.

- As soon as the baby was born, Portia got another cat for the baby and soon enough they became best friends.

- She teaches her kid about the seas, the stars, and gardening. Especially gardening.

- Your kid is feisty and very, very manipulative.

"But-" "Just because they're cute, doesn't mean they can have-" "M/C LOOK AT THEM."

- Portia adores her little baby and carries them around on her back in a scarf / sash

- She wastes no time in teaching them how to read and write.

- 100% would make flashcards and sit down with the baby for hours

- Trips to Nevivon skyrocket because Portia is such a proud mama.

- She also needs help taking care of a baby because she only knows cats and plants

- "What does it mean when they constantly brings me gifts?" "They hang out with their cat a lot.” "Oh-"

- Portia is the body positive queen <3 this baby will grow up so confident because of the constant love of their mamas <3

- Lowkey a millennial mom. Very protective over her kid

- "M/C what do i do?"

- Muriel is very nurturing and patient

- Lets the baby roll around in dirt, play with sticks, ride Inanna like a pony

- The fun / protective dad

- Muriel will do anything to protect his baby

- He loves to hold his kid

- "Muriel, they're 10-" "Still small enough for me to carry."

- By the time the kid is 12, they can survive completely off the grid. no questions asked.

- Muriel's weakness is his child's smile. Anytime this kid smiles or laughs, he gives in.

- Very much the, "I don't need it, they do." type of dad

- His child is very curious and always wants to take him on little trips and adventures through the city. As much as Muriel complains, he secretly loves it.