#with how spread out updates are. thats wishful thinking

[cloud-somersault]

I literally can't stand the way this stupid chapter went down. Chapter 7 has been a pain my ass the entire time, I can't even look at it without being pissed. And now posting it has left everyone confused, and I hate that added on confusion, as if this AU didn't have enough going on

I know it's not a big deal, but I hate disorganized things. I think it reflects badly on me and makes me look like I don't have my shit together, plus I deadass cannot stand what I wrote!! Even now!!

Ugh, can we all collectively forget about this...stupid reordering of chapters. I'm so pessimistic about it, and I'm glad I didn't delete it, but it's hard to see the silver lining right now

[waffles-art-writing]

Can you do Ghost(mw2) x female reader who is like Yor from spy x family(the jobs she has not the personality)

Female reader also has a child

COD MWII Ghost x Female!Assassin!Reader. (Reader has a child)

Summary: You’re recalled from retirement of being an Assassin, your daughter being your main priority. You end up going back into the field with Task Force 141. After the mainly successful mission, Ghost takes you home after finding out you’re injured but not sever enough to need to go to the medical wing. You share a soft moment with the cold lieutenant, showing the side of the quiet man no one has seen. The next morning the babysitter drops your daughter back home, your young child coming home to a surprise and a face she hasn’t seen since she was a wee babe.

Proofread: Kinda???? Not really

Pairing: Simon ‘Ghost’ Riley X Female Assassin (AFAB)

Age Rating: 16+

Codename: *Whatever you want it to be*

KEY: Y/N - Your Name. L/N - Last Name. C/N - Codename

Warning/Info: FLUFF!!!! Soft!Ghost, Injury Description, COD Violence, Female!Reader, Weapons. It is reasonably long. Call Of Duty Comic Description of Ghost.

If you want a part 2 please comment!!! <3 :) (PART TWO)

I apologise for the lack of posting, stuff irl has been picking up a lot and I will not be able to post as much as I wish I could. And I am applying for a new job which will result in me having to spend less and less time on here. :( but I’ll update when I can.

A screeching sound pierces through your calm, soundless sleep. The ear piercing sound making you groan, rolling over, smacking your hand onto your nightstand, slapping the screen of your phone. The sound comes to a halt, you look at the time. Eyes widening, you didn’t set the earlier alarm. “Shit shit shit.” You curse out, stumbling to pull on some pants, tossing a shirt over your head as you dash down the hall. Stopping to peek into your daughters room, who is fast asleep, covers pulled up to her chin, a foot sticking out of the bed to the side.

A soft smile spreads across your lips as you look at her. Her hair a mess on the pillow, hands wrapped around her stuffed dog toy, snuggled into it. You move away from the door, continuing on your mission to the bathroom, pulling your hair back into a messy bun. Life has been hectic ever since putting your job as an assassin on hold so you can have your daughter, and not end up losing her cause you’re not around enough. Only two people knew about you and your daughter, both of them still working well and truly.

You flick on the bright light in the bathroom, you look towards the mirror. Dark circles rest under your eyes, hair tousled and messy despite it being pulled up in a messy bun. You lean against the bathroom counter, turning the tap on to brush your teeth. Suddenly your phone vibrates, the sound echoing around the cold room, almost amplifying the sound. You tap the green button on the screen not looking who it was.

“Hello?” You answer, your voice quiet to not wake your daughter.

“Morning L/N.” The deep gravely voice of Price comes from the speakers, it almost sends a chill down your spine. You haven’t been called this early by him in a long while. “Morning John, is there something you need?” You cut straight to the point, not wanting to beat around the bush as to why he is calling you so early in the morning, on a week day of all days.

“Straight to the point as always I see. Yes, we need your expertise for an overview of a mission- Yes I know, before you even complain I know you aren’t in the field anymore, or thats what most say but Laswell says otherwise.” You roll your eyes, of course he would know you still do the occasional job but you haven’t done one for years, you aren’t even sure as to how he thinks you could help. “Mission Overview? What could I possibly help with?” You question, your hands running under the cold water to splash it onto your face.

“Its an Capture or kill mission and if the time comes and we, y’know gotta send the target on their merry way to an early grave, we want you to give us an idea on how we should do it.”

“And why can’t you guys figure it out?”

“L/N we need you for this, its a complicated mission… I myself want you in the field and execute this yourself…”

You sigh, running a hand down your face. You worked for KorTac - a mercenary group - and you assisted Price and his team the Task Force 141 on occasion. But you mainly worked solo, the Task Force 141 never met you, other than Price and Laswell. You met Ghost as well, you both stay in contact occasionally, only in case of emergencies… well more like, needing a ride from the base back home on the very rare occasion he decides to go home.

“Pay?” You ask.

“Whatever your rate is, kid.” He replies.

“Good. I’ll be there in 3 hours.” You hear Price reply with confirmation before hanging up the phone. Your fingers drum against the counter.

Okay, cool, doing another job, nothing new right? Just been out of the field for a few years, just gotta warm up a bit thats all… Right?

———

“Okay behave, don’t do anything silly and listen to your teachers. And remember to listen to Amber’s parents okay? Have a good day and a fun sleepover.” You say to your daughter - Emilia - kissing her forehead. “Yep!” She chimes, a smile spread across her cheeks, her braids neatly tucked up into a ponytail. “Good, Love you.” You smile, pulling her into a hug. “Love you too Mama.” She squeezes her arms around your neck, your crouched form still larger than her. Once you let go, she waves goodbye, running into school towards her friends. You smile, quickly turning around to walk towards the car park.

You make your way towards the dark blue sedan you bought far too long ago, still surprised it still works. Your face falls when you see a figure leaning against the hood of it, hands in their pockets, clad in black. Including a cap and what looks like a skull balaclava. You sigh, knowing who it is. Its not a common thing to see people walk around in a skull print mask and clad in full black.

“Lieutenant…” You greet when you reach him, he stands up and nods to you. “C/N…. Or should I call you Miss L/N?” He pokes, his dead pan tone not helping his remark to come across as teasing. You shake your head with a smile, unlocking the car. “I’m assuming you’ve been sent to make sure I end up coming right?”

Ghost shrugs, a small nod accompanying it. “We can’t be too careful…” He states, climbing into the passenger seat as you get into the drivers side. “Right… whatever you say Ghost.” You huff, buckling yourself in as you pull out of the car parking.

———

“The mission will be tough, but I brought an old acquaintance along to help us plan out a strategy. Boys, meet C/N. She has worked with me in the past and used to work for the Mercenary ground KorTac, she now works solo for the government.” Price states as you stand at the front of the room.

“Hello, Yes before you ask I’m what some call an ‘assassin’. I work solo but I haven’t worked in the field for some years now, as I have had other things going on. But I am still qualified to assist you boys in any way to make sure this mission is a success.” You pause, locking eyes with Ghost, he knows you’re nervous to be here again. You continue to inform them the best strategies for them to be able to do this unnoticed, especially while inside.

———

It’s the day of the mission, you managed to get a babysitter for Emilia. She wasn’t all too happy about you leaving for a few days, but you said you’ll be back in not time, and have a gift for her. Which is partly true, you just hope nothing goes south and cause you to stay away longer than you planned. You want to be back by the weekend, or at least before the new school week starts.

Your plan to stay out of the field didn’t last long, Gaz ended up falling sick with food poisoning, pretty bad food poisoning from the amount of time he spent in the bathroom or medical bay yesterday. Still having an upset gut this morning when you arrived at an ungodly hour in the morning, having just dropped Emilia off at the baby sitters.

The team is communicating back and forth over the comms, you’ve managed to infiltrate the building where the target is. The slick walls on the outside not making the job easier. You are definitely a lot less fit than what you thought you were, but still fit enough to keep up with the team and your job on this mission.

Assassinate the target, and get the hell home.

Simple right? Yeah really simple, if it wasn’t a great big warehouse like building with barely any cover or high points for you to use to your advantage.

———

“Got eyes on the target.” You whisper into the comms, slinking along the beams that support the A-Frame ceiling of the warehouse. “Copy that, Ready when you are C/N.” Price states, Ghost and Soap stating something of confirmation.

You step lightly across the beam, your light footwork going unnoticed by the man littering the floor below you. There’s a catwalk just below you, one armed guard standing at a door that leads into the office where your target sits, back to the door and window that overviews the factory.

The guard walks up and down the cat walk intermittently, observing everything below him. Never above him. How stupid.

As soon as the guard passes by under you, reaching a part in the catwalk railing that’s solid sheet metal. You jump down, landing lightly on your feet, the sounds of the factory drowning out your movement. Crouched low you sneak up behind him, slicing the backs of legs, right through the tendons that keep him standing. You spring up, hand covering his mouth to keep him silent. Other arm wrapping around to the front, quick jerk to the side. Lights out.

You gently lay his limp body down, tucking him up against the metal barrier.

“Guards out, preparing to breach the targets office.” You communicate. “Be careful C/N.” Ghost states over the Comms, both him and Soap just downstairs at the entrance, ready to breach if anything goes sideways. “Always am.” You hear Soap snort at your reply as Price growls at you all to focus.

Your skilful hands test the door, it doesn’t budge, the window that’s just a foot or two away from the edge of the cat walk is open. Either pick lock the door and risk getting caught with your back to the open or swing in through the open window and possibly fall and either hurt your self, die, or break all your bones then die by one of the other guards bullets. Either way you could end up dead.

Window.

Quickest way in.

———

The mission was a success, you managed to get into the room, secure the target and kill them. Clean and quietly. Getting out was a different mission entirely, one of the guards spotted the fact they couldn’t see another guard on the cat walk. They investigated and found the slumped body of the dead guard. Immediately yelling for the alarm to be pulled.

Ghost and Soap busted in to draw their attention to them and away from the office, all you had to do was get the fuck out and get to the extraction point. You managed to slip out the window on the far side of the office, but not without being nicked by the a few bullets.

You manage to sprint across the roof, throwing yourself off the edge and landing on top of a large truck with a large thump. You cough harshly, feeling like your ribs got smashed by a sledge hammer. You stumble to your feet, slipping off the side of the truck and sprinting towards the back fence of the compound, you glance to your right, seeing Ghost and Soap climbing the wall quickly. You fling yourself into the fence, dragging yourself over the top, thankful theres not barbed wire.

“C/N? You good?” Soap calls over the comms, you can hear he’s breathless, the faint sound of Ghost in the background barking orders out to the extraction chopper to start the engine. “Y-Yeah…” You wheeze, rushing through the brush of the forest, weaving in and out of trees heading uphill towards the small clearing the chopper is situated in. Your lungs burn, the cold air stinging your eyes and cheeks. The adrenaline numbing the pain in your leg and arm, your ribs still feeling like you’re wearing a corset.

You stumble into the clearing, Ghost and Soap a few paces ahead, the lieutenant spins around. Noticing you’ve arrived, Soap running to the chopper. You nod to Ghost as you approach, Ghost waits for you to pass before following after you into the chopper. You slump down into the uncomfortable chair of the helicopter, adjusting to keep your ribs from being pushed on by the seat strap.

Both the men ask if you’re okay, you wave them off chuckling while wheezing out a “Just a little unfit is all.” Soap chuckles, Ghost just shakes his head lightly, moving forward to signal for the chopper to get you all out of there.

———

Once back in England and on base you get a phone call from the babysitter a normal thing, it’s almost eight thirty in the evening “Hello?” You ask, bringing the phone to your ear as you walk down path towards the entrance of the base, car parked not too far front he entrance. “Hey Miss L/N! Lizzie here, I was just gonna put Emilia to bed. Are you free to talk to her?” The babysitter Lizzie states, it’s almost like a nightly ritual. Every night that you’re not home, whoever is looking after your daughter will call to see if your available to say goodnight to Emilia.

“Yeah I’m free.” You state, stopping at the end of the path by the entrance of the main building, sitting down on the bench outside. You hear Lizzie talking to Emilia, your daughter sounding tired but excited. “MAMA!” She calls through eh phone, you smile a and laugh lightly hearing your daughters voice warms your heart, her sweet voice making you happy. “Hey pumpkin. You behaving?” You ask her, having a teasing tone. “Yeah! We got to watch a movie while eating dinner!” She states happily, you smile listening to her talk about what happened throughout the day.

The door opens and closes, Ghost slips out into the cold evening. His eyes spot you off to the side, its dusk, the flood lights not coming on just yet. He can see your breath in the cold air, billowing out past your lips. His own breath billowing out into the air as he pulls his mask up, he leans against the small wall of the entrance staircase. He shoves he cigarette between his lips, cupping his hands around the flame of the lighter. He hears your laugh, it echos into the evening air. Its warm and light to his ears, his eyes flick up to watch you. He’s too far away to hear what you’re talking about.

You bid Emilia goodnight, shutting off your phone as you shoved it into your jacket pocket. Sighing as you search your small duffle bag for your keys, knowing you threw them in there. You wince, groaning as you lean over, gripping your side with ragged breaths.

Ghost pushes off the wall as soon as he sees you double over on the bench, showing pain. “Hey hey hey… what’s wrong?” He mumbles, flicking his cigarette in front of his boot and stomping it out. Stopping over the smouldering ashes to crouch down in front of you, pulling his mask down quickly as he kneels. “C/N what’s wrong?” He asks, his voice stern as he looks at your scrunched face, pain obvious across your expression. “My ribs- I… I thought they were just bruised.” You wheeze out, sitting back to look at him. His hands ghost over your knees as he stands, sitting next to you.

“Let me check, we don’t want you to go home with broken bones. Are you hurt anywhere else?” He asks, motioning for you to shrug off your jacket. “Just a few grazes from a bullet but I handled them, they weren’t deep.” You groan, pulling your jacket off, your thick jersey and shirt thankfully being warm enough in the crisp air. “Okay, may I touch your ribs? Under your jumper?” The taller man asks, you nod your head turning slightly so your back is facing him. His glove clad hands snake under your jersey and shirt, ghosting over your waist up to your ribs.

“Did you land on your back or front?” He asks, his fingers delicately pressing against your rib cage. “Front, kinda threw myself off the roof onto a truck roof…” you state, flinching when his hands snake around to your front, right under the hem of your sports bra. Rough gloves pressing into your ribs. You wine, flinching away from his hands. “Ow- Watch it lieutenant…” you snap, your body disagreeing with your sudden movements. “M’sorry” he mumbles, he pulls his hands back. Laying your jacket across your shoulders again. “Well nothing is broken from what I could tell, but you’re not driving.” He states, standing from his spot next to you and grabbing your duffle bag and throwing it over his shoulder.

You look at him confused, a brow raise as you slip your arms through eh jacket again, fixing your jersey and shirt in the process. You stand, looking up at the large man. “What? I need to get home, what the hell do you mean Ghost?” You ask, tone almost angry. “I’m driving you home, you shouldn’t drive when you have damaged ribs.” He states, keeping his explanation to a minimum. You sigh shaking your head as you follow him, he ready knows where your car is. You both arrived in the same vehicle so thankfully he remembered where you parked.

———

The drive back to your place was quiet, the occasional question, or observation. Ghost helps you out of your car, his hand ghosting over the small of your back guiding you up the stairs of the small apartment. “You didn’t have to walk me to my door, Ghost.” You state, unlocking the door and pushing the door open. Toeing off your boots by the door and dumping your bag on the couch as you walk past it, Ghost follows you in, leaving his boots by the door while closing it and locking it. He immediately walks towards your bathroom, he’s been here a few times, he knows the layout like the back of his hand. “Ghost? The hell are-” “Finding your med kit, take your shirt off, I need to properly check your ribs.” You stare down the corridor towards the bathroom with a shocked expression. You throw your coat over the back of the couch, walking down the hallway towards the bathroom, passing it towards your bedroom at the end of the hallway. “I’m in my room just so you know.” You call out, grabbing the hem of your jersey, wincing when you tug it up.

You jump at the feeling of calloused hands resting over yours. “G-Ghost?” You stutter, feeling his presence behind you, his breathing quiet and muffled by his mask. “Let me help.” He offers, more like stating he is going to help you even if you deny it. You lift your arms above your head, wincing at the movement. He tugs the heavy fabric carefully over your head, throwing it over to the hamper in the corner. You wince you turn around, looking up at the taller man. “Why… Why are you doing this?” You ask, brows furrowed.

“You go n’one else to help you, and I know that you wouldn’t get help.” He states, gently pulling your dark shirt up and over your head as well, your sports bra on full display. Ghost’s eyes linger on your chest for a second before quickly adverting his eyes to the medkit on your bed. “Sit down.” He mumbles as he opens the small bag, kneeling down in front of you. You sit with your arms tucked around your stomach, conscious of how you look.

You have always been conscious of your body, especially after your pregnancy. Your tummy never got back to as toned and flat as it was before. Stretch marks paint your hips and thighs, and your lower abdomen like tiger stripes, rough to the touch and unpleasant to look at. Ghost grabs the anti inflammatory cream from the kit, pulling his gloves off and warming the cream up in his hands. You stare at the movement of his hands, mind wandering to thoughts you never thought you would have again.

What would his hands feel like, I wonder if his touch is soft - he lays wears gloves maybe he has soft hands? Maybe they are rough, like his personality. What his he doesn’t like what I look like and thinks I’m disgusting, what if he thinks pathetic for being in pain. What if-

“Y/n?” Ghost asks, he’s being saying your name for the past few moments. You snap your attention back to him, letting out a small ‘huh?’ When you notice him looking at you with slightly furrowed brows. “Can I put the cream on?” He asks, his voice quiet, his hands resting on your legs, palms facing up with the cream smeared across them. “Oh… uh yeah…” A small blush of embarrassment paints your cheeks as you sit straighter, arms resting across your tummy. Ghost watches you sit up properly, reluctant to move your arms. He attempts to work around your arms, gently spreading the cream across your ribs. His hands are calloused but his touch his soft but firm enough to make sure the cream spreads.

“…Love, I need you to move your arms…” He states softly, his eyes looking up to yours, his soft with concern. You furrow your brows, looking away as you move your arms, the yellow light from your lamp glowing softly across your skin. The light bumped stretch marks marring your skin, the deep colour a large contrast against the rest of your skin, most of them have lightened but a few are still dark. You flinch when you feel his hands move lower along your rib cage.

He hasn’t said anything, quiet, like always, eyes analysing everything he is doing in great detail.

He finishes rubbing the cream in after gently lifting the side of your sports bra to get under the cloth, gently massaging the cream into your sore body. “Its still going to be bruise to shit, you’ll have to be careful…” He mumbles, he gently takes your left arm into his hands, peeling back the bandage you haphazardly wrapped around while back on the base. He smears the residue of the cream around the wound, “You did a good job at cleaning it…. Just half assed bandage” he teases lightly, re wrapping your arm with a clean bandage.

You shrug, handing your head, eyes trained on his knee thats pressing into the plush carpet of your room. The same carpet you paid too much money for and installed it yourself while almost 3 months pregnant. A lot of tears have been shed on this carpet, some blood but mainly tears. You hear him say something, your mind elsewhere as you mindlessly shake your head. Not a hundred percent sure on what you were disagreeing too.

You never noticed how detailed his tattoo is, its on display as he takes his jacket off, rolling his long sleeve up. The permanent ink thats been delicately painted into his skin stand out against the rest of his pale skin tone. The scars he’s gained after the tattoo break the ink in small lines, mostly the ink has stayed. His hands are large, rough but gentle. He’s always been a tough and scary man on the outside but you can see he has the same needs as anyone else. Love, affection and care… even partnership. Yes he has the team but he needs something more, but he’s scared, hesitant. Horrified if he gets too attached or too close with someone he cares about he will lose them, he’s terrier he will do the wrong thing, scare them off, pained himself in the a bad light he’s always been known to hold.

Ghost eventually gets to check the bullet graze on your thigh, its shallow. Still needing antibiotic cream and a new bandage, your track pants that unzip up your mid thigh are scrunched up around your hips and upper thigh as he works on your injury. Mumbling something as you hold the clothing out of the way.

“…Can you stay the night?”

Ghost’s movements cease for a brief moment, his breathing stilling as he glances up at you then back down at the bandage he’s wrapping around your thigh. You stay silent, looking at him. Hands itching to do something, but you can’t.

“…Sure…” he replies after a moment.

You nod your head, happy that he agreed. A little anxious despite the fact you know him, he knows you. Fuck he even knows your daughter since she was a wee babe, but hasn’t seen her for some years. She probably won’t remember him at all. She was barely three when he met her, she’s now turning six in a week.

Ghost zips your track pants back up, pulling the fabric down your leg. His hands linger on your covered calf. Fingers pressing in the muscle gently as he stares blankly. You can see he’s thinking, thinking to the point of being motionless. You lean forward, ignoring the slight pain thats throbbing throughout your body. You reach down a tap his hand thats on your calf, knowing he isn’t fond of physical touch. “Ghost…” you whisper, trying to draw him out of his thoughts.

He snaps his head up to look at you, eyes set at a hard glare which soften slightly when he realises its you. You give him a soft smile. “You okay?” You ask softly, his hands falling away from your calf, the warmth going with it. You miss it, the comforting weight and warmth of his large hands gripping your calf. He nods his head as he cleans his throat, standing to clean up the med kit and discard of the old bandages. “Yeah, I’ll be right back… Get uh…” he pauses glancing over at you when he turns to walk to the door. “Change and get into bed, I’ll get you water an a pain killer.” He states, closing the door behind him with a soft click.

Ghost shuts the door softly, careful to not slam it. He glances down at his watch. 2245 (10:45pm) he groans quietly, nudging the bathroom door open again the put the med kit back in the sink cabinet.

Why the hell did I agree to stay? What the fuck is wrong with me? Her skin was so soft… Her stretch marks were fucking amazing- FUCK I can’t think like this. I need to stop thinking like this, we are friends… are we even friends? What is she hates me and Is only offering for me to stay out of sympathy or it being late? God she has a kid, I can’t just barge into their life and be the man they see with their mother. I’m not a go-

His thoughts get cut short when he spots a photo of the fridge door, one side of it ripped, torn off. He reaches up and slides it out from under the sunflower magnet. The photo is of you, smiling as bright as the sun thats beaming in through the tree tops. Emilia is cradled in your arms, clearly only a few months old. Her big eyes beaming in sunlight, same colour as yours. Ghost’s fingers trace the ripped edge of the photo, he knew who was supposed to be there. He quickly pins it back to the fridge before taking the pain killers and water to your room.

———

You watch as Ghost places the bottle of water and pain killers on the bedside table. You’re sitting in bed, bag t-shirt and shorts. You look up at ghost, patting the bed next to you. Ghost stares for a moment, shocked you want him in your bed and not to just crash on the couch.

He opens his mouth to deny but you beat him to it. “You aren’t sleeping on that piece of shit couch, you’re staying in here with me. And thats final.” You state, tone firm. Ghost looks from you to the open space on the king sized bed next to you. His eyes flickering back and forth over and over again. “Sleeping on top of the blankets.” He mumbles out, knowing we won’t be able to get past your stubborn attitude, you’re a mother. You know how to get your way. You smile, a soft one of reassurance. You throw a spare shirt at him and point towards the box in the corner.

“Stole this from you a year ago cause you forgot to take it with you after you did your washing here…” You chuckle lightly, “The box should have some basketball shorts or something you can wear. They were my brothers that he gave to me when I was pregnant cause they were bigger than my clothes.” Ghost just nods, crouching down in front of the box and searching through it, he knows you would be angry at him if he slept in his clothes he wore that day.

He looks over at you then towards the lamp next to you, you get the idea and turn over. Back facing him, hand resting on the switch to turn it off as soon as you feel the bed dip behind you. It feels like an eternity for him to lay on the bed, even though he’s on top of the covers. You can hear a small groan emitting from his side of the bed, you flick the switch. The room delving into darkness, the only light peeking out from under our door, the nightlight that sits in the hallway for Emilia happily lighting under the dark corridor.

It quiet, apart from your breathing and Ghost’s muffled breaths, and the starting pitter patter of rain hitting the window. You turn to lay on your back, keeping your eyes on the ceiling.

“Thank you.”

Your soft words break the silence, Ghost looks at you from the corner of his eye. He’s laying like a dead man, straight as board, hands clasped together over his stomach as he looks towards the ceiling.

He hums in response, he turns his head to look at you properly, the dim light from the hallway making it practically impossible to see anything, but his eyes have adjusted easily. He reaches over to clasp your hand thats resting on your own stomach overtop the blankets. Squeezing it softly, letting you know he heard you. A small smile creeps up onto your lips. You turn onto your side, facing him now. He copies your action, bodies mirroring each other as your hands lay clasped together between the two of you. You let out a small sigh, his hand squeezes yours when he hears the heavy breath.

“Emilia would’ve jumped in between us if she was here, she doesn’t like when it starts raining late at night.” You state, smiling to yourself as you trace Ghost’s broad silhouette in the dark room. The small amount of light peeking through the thing curtains behind him on the far side of the room. “So she’s scared of rain?” Ghost’s rough voice cuts through the quiet, the gravel in his voice hoarse but still has a soft tone to it as he tries to talk quietly.

You shrug, unsure what she’s actually scared of. “I think it’s more when it suddenly pours down and it’s dark, the sound and lack of light scares her.” You hum, still trying to figure out what your daughter is scared of, even though you have reassure her many times that its just rain. You hear the deep rumble of Ghost making a humming like sound, like he’s thinking.

“Well… I’m sure there’s no monsters, you’re scary enough” he teases, squeezing your hand. You feign hurt, gasping and swatting his chest lightly. A giggle leaving you, a small, breathy almost non existent chuckle rumbles from Ghost’s chest. “God, if the Ghost thinks I’m scary, I really must be.” You laugh, teasing him back. Your ribs hurt from your laughter, but you’re too caught up in the fact you are hearing the one and only Lieutenant Riley laughing, laying on your bed, your hand in his.

“Nah, yer alright. You’re scary, but not as scary as Price when he hasn’t had his morning coffee” he jokes, tugging you closer slightly, he’s still on top of the blankets. His arm wrapping around your waist, careful on your sore ribs. “That’s true.” You agree, laughing softly as you place a hand on his chest, feather lightly touches run along your back. Your head tucked under his chin, his mask still on. Thankfully he didn’t wear the hard skull one and just a simple fabric one with a skull print.

Your laughter slowly ceases, breathing going back to normal. After a few moments of comfortable silence, you speak up again.

“Thank you again… This means a lot Ghost.”

A beat of silence passes.

“Simon…”

“What?”

“Call me Simon…”

Your eyes widen at his words, a warm feeling flooding your chest as you tuck your face into the nook between his shoulder and neck.

“Thank you Simon.”

“Anytime Y/n”

His words were barely a whisper, you fall back into silence. Its nice, the heat from his body keeping you warm, eating your pain in a way you didn’t think was possible. The pain killers probably taking most the credit for the lack of pain, yet the sense of security and comfort falls over you. Your eyes slide shut, breathing evening out as sleep pulls you into the depths of slumber.

“Goodnight, Love.”

————

You walk out of your room, hair messy, rubbing your eyes, feet padding across the hardwood of the hallway. Mind still in sleep mode. You round the corner into the kitchen from the hallway, bumping into something… more like someone. You wobble as you lose your balance, arms snake around your waist quickly, pulling you close.

“Careful, I don’t wanna take you to the hospital cause you broke your ass.” A deep voice chuckles, you look up, bleary eyed and confused. “O-Oh… Sorry Gho- Simon…” You apologies, rubbing a hand down your face with a groan, leaning your forehead against his chest. He’s changed into his cargo pants from the day before, same shirt from last night. It fits a little tight across his chest and his biceps but not too tight.

“Drinks on the coffee table, go sit down.” He states, his voice still laced with sleep. You look at him confused, glancing over at the coffee table. “Thanks, but you didn’t have to.” You state, walking over to the couch and slumping into it.

“I’m not the one who looks like I got ran over by a bus.” He teases as he walks over, bowl of fruit in hand and more painkillers and a glass of water. You thank him as he hands them to you, he sits next to you on the couch. “Feeling any better?” He asks, voice quiet. You nod your head, scooping some fruit into your mouth. The comfortable quiet gets broken by a knock at the door, you jump from your spot. “Shit” you mumble around a mouthful of fruit. “That’s Lizzie with Emilia.” You state stumbling from the couch, placing the bowl of fruit on the table, throwing your hair back into some sort of up-do. Simon stands from his spot, hands coming to rest on your shoulders. “Sit back down, I’ll get it.” He states, turning to go to the door.

“Wait Simon you still got-” you were gonna say hes still got his mask on, it will scare Lizzie and Emilia and confused them both as well. But your words die in your throat as you watch him tug it over his head, stuffing it in his pocket. You didn’t realise until now he must’ve washed the black war paint off when he got up. You watched in stunned silence, the man who never takes the mask off, ever. Has now taken it off, his dark short cut hair on display.

With baited breath you watch as the door opens, Lizzie coming into view with Emilia standing next to her gripping her hand. Lizzie looks up at the taller male with wide eyes, filled with confusion. You’re too shocked to register any words being exchanged between the two, you’re shaken from your trance when Simon turns to face you with a small smile. Jaw covered with a light stubble, dark chocolate eyes, a small scar cuts into his brow, two other scars rest just above his other brow. His nose is sharp, jawline defined. On his left another scars cuts through his top lip going up to the outer edge of his nose. There’s a another scar that paints his skin from the bridge of his nose trailing to the right, ending on his cheek bone below his eyes.

“MAMA!” Emilia screams, snapping you out of the trance properly. You crouched down catching her in your arms, ignoring the fact she just rammed straight into your heavily bruised ribs. “Hey pumpkin! I missed you so much.” Emilia wraps her arms around your neck, legs clinging to your waist like a koala as you stand up. Your arms scooped under her to support her properly as you walk over to stand next to Simon. “Thanks a lot Lizzie. I’ll go get your pay-” Simon stops you from moving towards the kitchen island to get your wallet. “Already paid her.” He states, hand resting on your lower back as you look up at him. Emilia looks between the two of you smiling. Lizzie waves it off and says shes happy to do it again, you bid her goodbye and close the door.

Emilia dragged Simon off to her room while you talked to Lizzie, saying something about wanting to show him her stuffed toys. You thank Lizzie again, showing your appreciation for her looking after your daughter. Once you closed the door, you stroll down the hallway. Hearing the rumbling timbre of Simon’s voice softly echoing around the apartment. You reach Emilia’s room, leaning against the door frame, you bite your tongue to not giggle at the sight in front of you.

There’s stands, Simon Ghost Riley, Clad in black cargo pants and a dark grey shirt. Sitting Criss Cross Apple Sauce on the floor, the pastel pink fluffy rug below him a strong contrast to his clothing. Emilia is rambling on about her stuff toys, pulling each stuffed animal off her bed to show the large man. Simon’s eyes are soft, just the barest hint of a smile on his lips as he nods along to Emilia’s words.

“And this one is Burt! He’s a water dragon! See!” The young girl states, a large smile on her face, cheeks rosy from excitement to showing a new person her toys. “Nice to meet you Burt.” Simon greets the toy, probably the umpteenth one he has greeted in the span of five minutes. “Nice to meet you too Mr. Simon!” Emilia states, hanging her voice to sound like a boyish drawl. You can’t help but chuckle at this, walking into the room when they both look over at you.

“I see your toys like Mr. Simon quite a lot, sweetheart.” You smile, taking a seat on the ground, knees tucked beneath you. Emilia smiles, nodding her head as she grabs another toy, leaving the small blue dragon next to Simon, like the rest of the toys she’s shown him so far. “She’s very confident and friendly for a kid.” Simon quietly states, keeping his voice low to talk to you. You nod and shrug your shoulders, a small smirk on your lips. “Yeah, I guess so. She always has been.”

“Mr. Simon… are you staying the night?” Emilia ask’s suddenly, gripping her favourite stuffed dog, in her hands. Simon looks from the young girl to you, in which you just nod to Emilia. “If your mum says I can.” He states, his tone soft. Emilia’s eyes light up, she jumps towards you, pressing the dog toy into your chest. “Please mama! Please please please! Can he stay!” She asks, more like demands. You laugh lightly, scooping the young girl up in your arms. Cradling her against you, humming in a a question manner. “Hmmm. I don’t see why not. SO yes, he can stay.” You conclude, laughing when Emilia squeals in excitement. “Thank you thank you!” She dashes from her spot in your arms, towards her bedroom door. “I gotta go build a fort for movies! Don’t come over till I’m done!” She states, dashing towards the living room, her bare feet pounding against the hardwood.

“Well… Look’s like you have a fan.” You tease the quiet man, a small smile on your lips as your eyes soften when you see him. His large and scarred hands softly gripping the small dragon toy in his hands. “Seem’s so… Guess I’m going to be spending more time here.” He states, standing as he places the toy back on the bed. You stand next to him, leaning up and leaving a light kiss on his cheek. “Thank you…” you softly state, placing a hand on his upper arm before leaving the room when you hear Emilia yell something about needing help.

Simon watches you leave, a hand ghosting over his cheek. His chest tightening with emotion, it feels tight but its almost comforting. He shakes his head as he follows you out, planning to help Emilia with her ‘fort’.

[the-kipsabian]

wrestling fic writers!!

i have decided to be the change i wanna see, so lets do a nice little thing for each other, as a community full of incredible and talented writers. yes this is writer specific only, but thats cause thats where the main problem of people not interacting with creative works lies in this fandom as far as i can tell and have seen people talking about it especially in the last couple of months

if you read this, please add links to your written works. it can be just a single fic youre really proud of, your writing blog, your writing tag, your ao3 account, anything where your works can be found

and if you leave your link here, PLEASE check out someone else that has left their works, and interact with them. leave them a comment, even just a kudos, REBLOG their fic, etc. interacting is the keyword i want to emphasize here, along with building a sort of a masterpost of where to find people writing in this fandom

and if you are not a writer, youre still highly encouraged to interact with this post and share it and show love to the writers in this fandom, obviously!! i think that should go without saying, but adding it in anyways

a bit more about my vision and resources and such under the read more, but thats the gist of it. happy linking and please be kind and supportive to each other!! 💜

nobody is too big or too small to add their things on this list. if you write and post anything in this fandom whatsoever, be it fics or drabbles or headcanons, any companies or any kind of ships or reader inserts or any content whatsoever no matter how 'dead dove dont eat' or hell even if its just meta, we welcome all here and nobody can say that one thing is less valid than another. just please tag your content accordingly, especially if theres content warnings, and feel free to mention what you write, who you write, any info you wish to leave that would help people before they click on your links. but even so, that should not and hopefully will not deter people from interacting, no matter what it is. someones trash is another ones treasure, i promise you

and unless the amount gets really overwhelming, im personally going to be checking out everyone that leaves something here. unless it squeaks me out, but even then, i'll spread the word. and i just wish as many people as possible will do the same, and not just use this as a potential board to only get eyes on their stuff. ofc thats also the point, but you should give as much, if not more, than you get. we need to be kind and supportive of one another (besides, from personal experience, if you show love to someone else, they are more likely to do it back than without you taking the first step, so... pay it forward)

as for resources, heres a few links that should be helpful in leaving comments and feedback. of course everyone does their own thing and no comment is too big or too small to leave, but for those who need them. if you have anything you'd like added to this list, dont hesitate to get in touch or drop it in the post yourself!!

101 comment starters

ao3 floating comment box

kudos html

dont know how to comment? easy solutions

a quick hot guide to commenting (by yours truly)

an overall guide to appreciating fanfic writers

and just in general.. leave people comments. leave them asks about their projects. just go over and gush about their work. i know it sounds embarrassing but writers love nothing more than to hear that someone likes what they are doing. if you find a fic that hasnt been updated in forever, comment on it. it might just be the spark the author needs to continue. while kudos and likes are nice, and just as valuable to some, its definitely in the words the people leave for them that matter the most. im not saying this to put pressure on anyone, its just how it is, and i feel like unless people are writers themselves, and even then sometimes, thats just hard to grasp, especially if the writer is a smaller and less popular one who doesnt get a lot of traffic in the first place

i think thats all. just be nice and considered to everyone, reblog peoples works, this post with others add ons and so forth. and if i find anyone talking shit here or at other writers for something they share, you'll be blocked and im probably taking your kneecaps. be fucking nice. we are all struggling here and we need to stick together

happy sharing and commenting 💜💜

[roomsofangel]

GROWING PAINS . . . # CHAPTER NINE !

synopsis you hated christmas. simple. this year was no different, the only thing changing was the scenery when you decide to let your older brother, yunho convince you to visit your grandmother who neither of you had met but hoped it would do some good. everything was still the same — writer’s block, the winter loneliness, the way yunho won’t stop singing jingle bell rock, yeah, everything was the same. at least, until a certain blonde haired boy made it his mission to melt your iced heart.

warnings none really!

wc 1.3k

if you’d like to be added to the taglist please either send an ask in my inbox or leave a comment to be added to the taglist! reblogs and comments are also very appreciated! ^_^

this chapter is in san’s pov !

a/n i decided to update this today and give you all a double update for growing pains since i know it has been a good while:( let me know what you guys think :D

san thought he knew a lot of things back when he was still a rosy cheeked kid with deeper dimples than he had now — when he still had a lot of hope in the world and nothing snuffed out his spark just yet.

and maybe now that he’s an adult with more emotional scars than before, he can say he never wants anyone to feel the way he did. not since that night, he refuses to let anyone feel as if he has given up on them. sometimes he wonders if thats who he is or the fact he just wished no one ever gave up on him.

this small town, oh the ache it carried when he decided to come back three years ago to care for his mother. it was best to not live these days in his own rues, he had to learn to accept the past and embrace the future, no matter how much it ached.

and for the most part, san was fully convinced he was healed from that chapter of his life — that he no longer needed medication to make him feel alright.

“and this is yeosang.”

ah, that made his world shatter. kang yeosang in the flesh.

his eyes couldn’t help but match the other’s when they narrowed, eyeing and taking in the sight of how he was sat before the sound of your voice came up again, “you can sit by me if you want to.”

and san felt his heart ache a little, well— does it count as an ache? he hasn’t felt anything in his chest like this before, unless it was to do with hurt and sorrow. san nods, “of course yn.” he smiled, and tried to ignore the feeling of a glare on him as he took a seat with you, your smile warming him up.

it seemed that time was going by achingly slow, but san was thankful for the three that were there. mingi seemed to be decent, he reminded him of wooyoung. he should text wooyoung later, he forgot to do so.

as the movie progressed, it was some romcom that san could recall watching with his sister years ago, he couldn’t remember the name but he could recall certain scenes as he tried to snack on the popcorn given and focus on the texture, the taste. he could feel your hand brush against his and he felt his face warm, why was he warm?

“personally, if she says i’m a bird i’m gonna be a bird.” mingi broke the silence with his hands raised up in defense, making yunho snort and san couldn’t help but laugh a little himself and nod along. “so are you?” he teased a little and mingi grinned

“i like this guy.” mingi motioned over to san who nodded his head in acknowledgment and returned the grin, yunho agreeing with a “right!”

but san didn’t miss one thing,

the one thing but san is he was too observant for his own good

so yeosang must have forgotten that san noticed everything, even the similar little scowl that he remembered all too well.

“no! like this!” mingi shoved yunho aside to get onto the snowy ground, laying on his back and spread out to begin making a snow angel, making yunho groan and find a new spot to make his own

san chuckled, turning his attention to you who quickly looked away and back at your brother, making his lips only curl up more. he was convinced his face would hurt later on. “are they always like this?” he asked, wondering out loud and asking you while you nod and laugh. “sadly.” you said in response, san chuckled

“thank you for inviting me, yn.” san whispered softly as his eyes glanced up at the night sky, the stars twinkling and he noticed the moon was full. god, it was beautiful. he always loved the moon, he loved the different meanings and the different phases. how can something so magnetic and beautiful also be so far?

his eyes glanced towards you, your rosy nose scrunching as you felt the snowflakes fall onto the bridge of your nose and melt on your skin, your focus more on the same moon he was admiring.

how can something so magnetic and beautiful feel so far?

san walked back to his home, holding his house keys while you followed behind, your little hums making him smile at the snowy ground that he tried to focus on, counting each little detail. “hey san,” your voice met his ears, and he hummed in response

“i’m glad you came tonight.” you said, the two of you reaching his doorstep and he thought this was comical in a way, maybe even endearing. you were walking him to his door this time, oh how the roles reversed but he didn’t mind. he’d do anything to spend just even another second with you.

san smiled, “me too.”

“i’ll.. see you around?” your voice got a bit higher towards the end, your feet backpedaling to walk away soon to get on your way back home but your gaze was still on him, cheeks and nose rosy. “you know where to find me.” he whispered, not letting his eyes leave you for one moment. no, he needed to every little detail of you tonight committed to memory.

you looked.. so beautiful, under the moonlight with the snowflakes in your hair. “goodnight, san.” you looked at him, and he nodded.

“goodnight, yn.”

you reminded san of the moon,

he just hoped he could be your sun.

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taglist (open) @myonlyloveseungmin @itsvxlentine @rockstarsanie @brown88 @barbielibra @vixensss @satsuri3su @yessa-vie @yoichiislovie

[regretisstoredintheme]

Could I perhaps ask for Rottmnt donnie x reader where reader has like a huge crush on Donnie and they've recently got new glasses. Since they got new glasses, they're like super scared to go visit the bois in the lair because they think they look stupid and they don't wanna Donnie seeing

It started with a whisperrrr and that was when I— HMMMM??????

WHATS THIS?? A REQUEST!??

*snatches paper* 

“Anonymous asked: Could I perhaps ask for Rottmnt donnie x reader where reader has like a huge crush on Donnie and they've recently got new glasses. Since they got new glasses, they're like super scared to go visit the bois in the lair because they think they look stupid and they don't wanna Donnie seeing”

A/N: This. Is. So. adorable. PREPARE, LITTLE ANON. *cracks knuckles* 

—

No Difference. (A Oneshot) - Donatello x Reader

Warnings: Self deprecating, gender neutral reader but April does say “gurl” like once. Disclaimer that I have never had this feeling, I just went off of my gut. 

-

Blurry. 

The world seemed a lot better when it was blurry. It seemed a lot nicer, a lot safer, and a lot less humiliating. Those were the thoughts that went through your head as you sat in your room, holding the new pair of spectacles in your hand. You wished they didn’t update your prescription— you wished they gave you contacts instead, because when you looked in the mirror, all you saw was the idiot you knew yourself to be. 

They made your eyes look huge, and you felt defective for needing such thick lenses. Defective, yeah thats exactly what you were— the exact opposite of the one person you felt drawn to. 

Oh yes, the purple clad terrapin, who doesn’t cease to consistently amaze you. What would he think of you now? 

You lifted your hood, biting your lip as you hauled your backpack over your shoulders. It was time to leave, to join the monsters in hell, or— as they called it, Highschool. 

You tried not to talk to anyone, you tried to avoid people you knew, but no matter where you went, it seemed people had to point out your new prescription. Whether it was the teacher, or peers who never even made the conscious decision to know your name. Either way, it was like a plague, a sticker on your forehead, a walking cactus up your leg… you hated it. You hated it with a burning passion, you hated it so much that you weren’t even hungry when you went to lunch, so much that you didn’t even notice April when you knocked into her. 

“Oof—!” She huffed, fixing her glasses, “Y/n?” Squinting, a smile spread wide on her lips, “There you are!” She cheered, nudging your side, “I was starting to think you got sick today!” A laugh left her throat, “nice glasses, by the way, are those new?” Her hands sat at her hips, unfazed and waiting for your reply. 

Your smile faded as she mentioned your apparel, feeling once again like it was a smudge on your face. “Well.. yeah..” you muttered, reaching up to take them off. 

“‘Well, yeah..’?“ April mimicked your words, a brow lifting as she saw right through your bullshit. 

“I mean—“ you paused, “Its just…” 

April waited patiently, walking with you to a place you could both sit without being disturbed. “Don’t they look.. I dunno.. stupid..?” You tried to stop from tearing up, but the water pricked your eyes, forcing you to wipe them away before you embarrassed yourself further. 

The girl next to you gave an incredulous look, but shook her head, trying to be understanding. “Thats bullshit, Y/n.” She said upfront, her brows furrowing slightly, “you look incredible all the time.” She was quiet for a moment, before looking up, an idea sparking in her head. “How about we go see the guys?” She suggested, tilting her head to you, “I bet a certain scientist could wash away all that nonsense thinking.” 

She deflated when you shook your head vigorously, eyes squeezed shut as you felt  heat in your face at the thought. “I don’t want him to think I’m stupid..” you mumbled, fumbling with the hem of your hoodie. “Girl…” April’s eyes lidded, “you know Donnie had dorky glasses he was embarrassed of too, right?” She chuckled, “he was so upset that he started working on making his own contacts immediately, getting frustrated when they didn’t work.” 

Your head raised a little as she told the story, blinking with surprise. “Ohhh Leo teased him endlessly, calling him ‘Nerdatello’, but if I’m honest, I don’t think it made Donnie look any less cool.” Now you were chuckling with her, a hesitant smile on your face. “..but…” you felt the fear crawling up your throat again, biting your lip as you looked anywhere but April’s face. “Donnie looks cool no matter what I— … What if he ..laughs at me..” 

“ I’ll kick his sorry ass!!” April barked, a hand clapped protectively over your shoulder, “but trust me, he wont.”

“D may be a genius, but he’s stupid when it comes to you.” 

——

The sewers only served to raise your anxiety, the random ripples in the water, the echo of your footsteps, the detail magnifying in everything you could see in your glasses. It was so overwhelming, you thought you were gonna be sick. You wanted to believe what April said, you really did, but this sinking feeling just couldn’t be swayed, and you kept thinking about the possibilities.

“You alright back there?” April called over her shoulder, slowing down so you could catch up to her. “I dunno, April.. you seeing me is one thing, but the guys…” Fiddling with your fingers, you walked up next to her, head drooped. “You gotta get some confidence, man.” April hit your side lightly, “you’ve got nothing to worry about. Except maybe Leo… but it’s his turn on patrol.” She waved the metaphorical situation away, still smiling at you like she always did. 

Walking into the lair, you tried to calm your rapidly beating heart, the lair looked so much different with this much detail— you could actually read the graffiti on the skate ramp and see who’s room was who’s. Your breath hitched when you saw the familiar purple sheen of your favorite turtle, his lab always illuminating some kind of glow. April climbed up the ladder to the second floor, you always one step behind her — as if hiding your face. 

Don’t think for a second April didn’t notice, her eyes were on you the entire time. “Donnnnieeeee~!” She drawled, inviting herself in. You hesitated at the entrance, but April’s hand around your wrist pulled you inside, despite your nonverbal protests. “I brought a surprise!!” 

Your eyes rested momentarily on the back of the turtle’s gaming chair, feeling a gentle warmth in your chest upon being in his presence. 

“Is it coffee? Please let it be coffee.” The soft shell groaned, scooting out of his chair before spinning around to look at the both of you. “Nope, better.” April said confidently, and with that, suddenly you weren’t hiding behind her anymore— her hands firm on your shoulders as she presented you like a prize. 

Donnie’s eyes widened slightly, giving April a look you couldn’t quite read. The softshell seemed to straighten up, dusting himself off before standing. He put on a coy smile, trying to draw attention away from his messy desktop. “What brings you to my humble abode?” He said smoothly, gaining his composure. If you were honest, Donnie looked like he had just done an all-nighter, the bags under his eyes evident as he stared at your forehead rather than your pupils. You knew he had some trouble with eye contact — but you expected him to notice the ‘stain’ on your face. 

“Humble?” April smirked, pointing out his change in demeanor. 

The purple turtle shot her another glance, this time a faint blush over his nose. He coughed into his hand, “anyway..” muttering something, he then finally looked you in the eye. He halted, analyzing before he pulled down his goggles, making sure he was seeing right. “… you have a freckle right there...” he muttered, going to poke it before backing up, flabbergasted as his finger touched glass. He squinted in on your blurry face, your features coming back into focus. “Oh.. you got new glasses… that’s….. cu—cool. Cool cool cool..” he looked away quickly as he realized his mistake, coughing to cover up the Freudian slip.

“Dee..” April rubbed the crease between her brows, trying not to get frustrated. “When did you sleep?” 

Donnie looked at her, smiling with all the confidence in the world. “Nope.” He paused, realizing his answer didn’t make sense. “Yes….terweek.” He said again, this time satisfied with his answer. Before April could protest, he was slinking an arm around your shoulder, smiling at you instead. “Hey, since April didn’t bring me a coffee, what say we go grab one?” 

He smirked, leading you out of the lab before you could even say yes. You weren’t exactly keen on him neglecting his needs— but he was taking a break.. personally, you were still flabbergasted he didn’t mention your glasses more— maybe it didn’t make as much of a difference as you thought…

Donnie turned to April, giving her a small salute over his shoulder before disappearing from her sight. April’s annoyed attitude all but evaporated, smirking as she let her brother off with a wink. 

Their plan worked. 

—

A/N: HIIIII this was so fun to write… I HOPE ITS OK!!!! You can’t tell me April wouldn’t phone Donnie about the situation, especially when he’s the smartest person she knows! They both knew of your little crush, Donnie isn’t as dense as people think and April keeps secrets between her and her best friend. Making sure you don’t feel uncomfortable is their number one goal, even if it means a little lying.

[counterfeitphantoms]

What's your interpretation of the Phantom Queen?

Evil? Satan? Any good? Why does she want Jamaa?

I'd look on the wikia, but I am not sure how accurate that is, and the lore of AJ is never in one place. Wish someone made a doc or just a really long thread to reference.

good call on the wiki, there's a lot of flat out incorrect/non-updated info on that 😭 (though @/Asteralium is working on a project to consolidate the lore all in one place!) . my thoughts under the cut because it is a LOT...

BUT if we're talking my interpretation of the canon queen, I believe she flat out IS just evil, flat out. Lesser Phantoms (Common types), on the other hand, likely aren't pure evil and have some form of agency over what they would like to do, and we've seen some even flat out go to Jamaas side with play-wilds phantoms (playable ones) and classics pet phantoms (which is stated they just want to be loved) Along that same vein I think kings generally are pretty evil, not sure of their capacity to really WANT anything else except for what the queen wants to some vague degree (though the king in the books is... odd, he seems VERY set on revenge and he seems to believe he should be the one rightfully ruling over Jamaa)

But back to the queen. hmm. I think her ultimate goal is just to consume more and more land/resources, for no particular reason other than to continue spreading and consuming. She doesn't have some tragic backstory or overarching reason for doing what she does; she just wants MORE, constantly, no matter the cost or harm it may cause. It falls in-line with phantoms pollution theme really well, I think! Since phantoms have recently been established as an evil force thats consistent across all dimensions (play wild and classic are canonically different worlds now, but the phantoms in both are the exact same phantoms that can just hop from world to world using portals); I think they ultimately just want to bring in more and more Jamaas' into their own world (the phantom dimension we see a lot of in playwild, and some in classic) just to assimilate them, thus adding onto their own world as a result!

The Phantom Dimension I think is… expansive, insanely so. It's a large sprawling network of corrupted lands that have become so twisted that nothing except phantoms can live inside of it (think: the phantom badlands in AJC, where phantoms pollute land for their own taking, making it inhospitable to literally anything else); I dont think the alphas (or animals, as a whole) can really begin to grasp what the ultimate endgoal of phantoms really IS. They certainly don't fully know about the Phantom Queen- maybe of her existence, but not her full reach/what her real gameplan even is; though, maybe AJCS greely does considering recently he's been becoming more and more aware of another world besides his own existing & all that! (on the other hand, play wilds alphas dont even KNOW that there's at least 4 kings, and still believe there's only one at the moment, so they absolutely aren't aware of the queen even a little)

Ultimately I think. PQ will never really be satisfied. there'll never be a point where shes just like. okay, pack it up guys we're done here. I think if she manages to assimilate classic or play wilds world, she'll just move onto another Jamaa, then another. She has little care for the destruction she's leaving behind, and absolutely barely even considers animals something worth acknowledging

[one-idea]

I see that you are also a fellow fan of Ace x Deuce! They are so cute together and deserve nothing but the best to happen for them. A cute headcanon I have about them is Ace learning how to cook Deuce's favorite foods/meals to show his love for the masked man.

We've seen the novel, he called Deuce his treasure and we also saw that none of the spades are very good cooks. Ace would know he's not very good in the culinary arts but he has Thatch to teach him! He's seen and tasted how good Thatch's food is, he wants to be able to make Deuce feel good and appreciated at the end of the day so therefor hes determined to learn one thing that's Deuce's favorite. Thatch and the other cooks think it's so sweet that Ace is committed like this to learn how to cook Deuce's favorite things just to make him happy, how can they not help him?! So they're right there to help the young commander in his mission, showing him what he needs to do and how to do it.

See you get it!

They are adorable. I’m a sucker for captain and first-mate dynamics and I wish we had more of these two. Just more about the spades and Ace’s journey in general.

But this is such a cute idea!

The Spades biggest problem was food. No one on that ship knew how to cook. So when they join up with the Whitebeards I can just imagine the joy at having some good food.

Ace doesn’t eat with his old crew mates right away, as Deuce made the decision to merge with the Whitebeards to keep the crew alive while Ace was still being a murder boy. So Ace isn’t there the first time Deuce gland the others get to eat Thatch’s cooking. There are tears all around.

Once Ace finally stops trying to murder Whitebeard and reunites with his old crew mates they sit down for a meal and just talk about how much better the food is. That this is just one of the benefits of joining up with the Whitebeards. (They’re trying to gauge where Ace is with accepting he’s no longer captain but Ace has already processed that. His crew hasn’t but he’s had time away to think while trying to murder Whitebeard)

So they join up and the time they get to spend together drastically decreases. After all the Spades are all spread out through the divisions. But Deuce is pretty centralized as a member of the 1st divisions medical staff. All of his old crewmates come to him for care but also for updates on each other. Deuce has all the tea and updates the Spades on how their old crewmates are doing when they can’t see each other as often.

Ace however make it a priority to meet up with Deuce at least once a week. Thats his fist-mate, doctor now, and who’s going to tell the 2nd division commanders no? No one. (The other commanders allow it because they have a betting pool on how long it will take for Ace and Deuce to realize they are in love with each other. Also it’s the only way to get Ace to get checked out after a fight/mission. He fights like a rabid dog against any doctor who isn’t Deuce and eventually Marcos.)

So the two of them get lunch/dinner/brunch/midnight snack (whatever time it is when they can meet) regularly. It’s in these meeting that Ace realizes that Deuce has a comfort meal. After a hard shift/battle Deuce gravitates towards one meal in particular. Ace isn’t the only one who notices as Thatch seems to always have a single serving on hand when Deuce needs it.

Ace logs that information away. At the moment it’s nothing more than “Deuce eats that a lot.” But then Deuce has a hard week. He had a lot of insecurities surrounding his ability as a doctor thanks to his father and working along side people like Marcos gives him big imposter syndrome sometimes. (He’s doing a great job. He’s learned a lot and learned fast, but he’s a medical school drop out from a high demanding family, no matter how good Marco’s and the other tell him he’s doing it never feels good enough. He’s always going to feel like the medical school drop out masquerading among real doctors.) on top of that he hasn’t had time to write in weeks and one of his journals got water logged. It’s just a rough time.

Ace finds the journal and is able to dry the pages by carefully heating his hand and hovering it over the pages. He doesn’t look at what Deuce wrote, he knows Deuce can be sensitive about that. (Mostly because Deuce knows he’s writing Ace through rose tinted glasses and is super embarrassed and stressed at the idea of Ace reading any of it.) the two sit together and talk about it as Deuce flips the pages and Ace keeps his hand a safe temperature to dry but not burn the pages.

Deuce tells him about how he’s feeling and how long the week has felt. “I haven’t even made it to the mess hall once this week. I just eat whatever the nurses bring by for us. Which is super nice of them but I’d like to get my own food and just sit for a bit you know?”

And Ace’s brain lights up. Deuce has a favorite meal. That could make Deuce feel better. He suggests going to the kitchen as soon as their done and get some food, Thatch will make that meal if Ace asks him to, they are friends. And Deuce agrees but is pulled away for a medical emergency.

But that’s not going to stop Ace. He heads over to Thatch and asks him about the meal. Thatch is surprised because he knows that Deuce’s comfort food, he’s a chef he notices that stuff. But for Portagas human black hole D. Ace to notice is different. He thought Ace swallowed without looking. But then again he would have to be blind to miss the way Ace looks at Deuce. So maybe Ace is more observant than they give him credit for.

Ace asks about make the meal, he means can Thatch make it, and Thatch hears, ‘teach me how to make my crushes favorite food!’ (He’s hopelessly romantic at heart) but problem. They can’t make that meal right now. He’s missing some ingredients. But they will be at port tomorrow and they can pick up what they need and Thatch will teach Ace how to make the dish.

Ace, who had not until this moment, thought about learning to cook realizes this is a great plan because he can come and make Deuce’s favorite whenever he’s sad, just cut out the middle man, agrees.

So the next day the two set off to get what they need to make Deuces favorite meal.

Problem

One Ace has only ever carved up meat, put it on sticks, and roasted it. He is not prepared for the amount of technical skills the meal requires.

He strikes me as the type to hear “separate the eggs” and push the individual in cracked eggs apart and then ask what’s next.

Thatch is at a cross because is kinda adorable but also so stupid and he can’t laugh because Ace is putting himself out here trying to learn and he shuts down when he thinks people are mocking him.

He almost losses it when the instructions are to beat something and Ace punches his fist to his palm with “that will be easy they won’t fight back”

It becomes significantly less funny when the instruction “roast veggies” comes up and Ace about burns down the kitchen with a cheer “I can do that” and attempts to fire fist them.

Which leads us to Problem 2: Ace is a fire man. Neither he or That h thought this would be a problem but as he’s cooking using the pan he gets nervous about whether or not Deuce will like it, if he���s going to ruin the dish, and his hand heats up without him realizing. The condition of heat transferring from his hand to the pan handle to the pan starts cooking the food at a way higher temperature then what the stove is set to. Leading to several burnt attempts and two fires before Thatch realized the problem.

It’s a day. Thatch didn’t think it could go this badly. But by the end Ace has “helped” to make Deuce meal. (He tried every step and incinerate all of his attempts so Thatch took over cooking and delegated all chopping and stirring to Ace. But the meal is made. It is edible. And Ace is walking it to Deuce.

Except Deuce is on medical shift and can see Ace right now.

That’s fine Ace will wait. So he waits in Deuce’s room using his hand to keep the meal warm. Deuce gets off hours later and is exhausted. When he gets to his room he finds a passed out Ace on his bed with his favorite meal resting on Ace’s stomach. It’s cold now, since Ace lost the battle with sleep a while ago. But it’s still one of the best things Deuce had had in weeks. After finishing the meal, he curls up next to his ex-captain and falls asleep.

When the two wake up Ace gets excited about giving him the food only to realize Deuce already ate it. He proudly tells Deuce he helped make it and the thank you and smile that he gets from Deuce makes his heart race.

When they separate for the day, Ace storms to the kitchen, basically kicking the door open. “Thatch I need to learn to cook!” Because the wants to see that smile on Deuces face all the time. He wants to be the cause of that smile.

Thatch still traumatized from yesterday, but also a good friend and hopeless romantic, agrees. On the condition that they start with simpler recipes.

So Ace starts helping out in the kitchen when he can, and telling Thatch all about his feelings for Deuce. Thatch loves this. He gets to hang out with his little brother and get all the drama while getting help on feeding this over sized crew. A win all around. The kitchen staff loves to tease Ace, it’s tame as they condone want to scare the boy away.

Ace also ends up being the medical staffs favorite delivery boy. He always wants to bring Deuce lunch and Thatch makes him take enough for the other doctors and nurses. It’s always good food, the staff doesn’t have to go get it, and it comes with the free show of watching Deuce and Ace stumble over themselves. A win for the medical staff all around.

As soon as Ace leaves the medical staff descends on Deuce asking when he’s going to put the “poor boy out of his misery.” And ask him out already. Deuce is five shades of red and denying it until some other member of the medical staff jokes “well if you’re not going to do it I will.” It’s a joke. Everyone in the Whitebeards ships the two of them together but Deuce doesn’t realize that.

He leaves that day with his brain full of “if you don’t do it I will.” And the thought drives him a little mad. He knows he doesn’t own Ace, and if Ace wants to date someone he’d be supportive but he’s so down bad for his friend that he can’t even think about Ace being with someone else without his heart aching.

He thinks he just needs the evening to sleep it off and feel better, but Ace runs into him outside of his room. He’s asking some question about if Deuce liked the lunch he made. And Deuce’s can’t take it. Because Ace is always making lunch for him now, sure the rest of the medical team on duty gets it as well but Ace specifically made it for him, not them and definitely not that other doctor.

He grabs Ace’s hand and drags him into his room. Ace is asking what is wrong but Deuce had already closed the door behind them and has whorled around to kiss Ace. His hands reaching up to frame Ace’s freckles cheek. His other hand snagging around Ace’s waist and its perfect.

Until Deuce brain kicks in and he pulls away because ‘omg I just ruined everything.’ Deuce is freaking out.

Meanwhile Ace’s brain melted the moment Deuce’s lips touched his. It oozed out of his ears when Deuce cradled his face and placed his hand on the small of his bare back. It take Ace a hot second to blink back to reality.

It’s Deuce’s “I’m sorry” and for a second Ace thinks Deuce didn’t want to kiss him until “I should have asked before-” never mind his friend? Is just an anxious mess.

And Ace kisses him back, both his hands coming up to frame Deuce’s cheeks. He bad at this he’s to excited and didn’t plan on angling their noses or anything. He just wanted to kiss his friend again.

Once Deuce’s brain kicks back in he has to use his hold on Aces hair to fix their position, pulling back just enough to fit them together better. But doing so made Ace whin and chase after him and why hadn’t they done this earlier?

Oh boy this got away from me.

But thank you for the ask! I hope you enjoyed it.

[stupidgtblog]

Lore Stuff number 1

Edit: forgot to tag @tineylittledude

I was gonna reply but I figured I should create a post to make it a series! BE WARNED this is literally infodumping. VERYYY MESSY. If you want something less unhinged, just read my actual stories when I update them!

SOOOO first let's start with

Why does Sylvia have the reputation she does?

OK, so VERY LOADED QUESTION but the best answer is mainly because she fostered it. If people are scared of you, they leave you alone. If people think you're a threat, they won't try and attack you. When people first became *aware* of her, she used to get absolutely tormented. Daily attempts on her life. So she decided to start spreading rumors about *herself.* Whenever a band of rogues came in search of glory, she gave them a story to spread (BY SCARING THE CRAP OUT OF THEM) and kind of feeding them lies? Telling people you've killed someone without actually killing anyone kind of has the same effect as doing the real thing???

EXAMPLE TIME!

"You're a bard, I see? Lyre and all." She said, like they were just having small talk, like she wasn't holding him in a single fist. She had the most casual expression on her face! She had to be crazy.

"Something I notice about bards is..." She began to pinch an arm between her fingers, raising it by the wrist. "They get really upset when I break their little hands." They sat in tense silence for way too while, before she burst into laughter.

"I just wish you could see the look on your face - it was like I was the devil!" Her grip loosened to somewhat secure, comfortable. "Look, I'll let you and your friends leave, but only if you tell people to stop trying to kill me. It isn't going to work, it's annoying, and if someone else tries again, I'll break their spine along with their hands. Deal?"

She'd never seen such a quick nod in her life. And then she was alone again.

--

A VERY EFFECTIVE METHOD! RUMOR SPREADS MEMETIC INFORMATION and now in passing you've heard you got another scary nickname! Bardbreaker. How metal.

Okay now for number two :3

Why is magic outlawed?

This is a more lore-intense answer. Magic is outlawed specifically for women (no girlbossing allowed.) For some background...

Sylvia lives in a magically-enhanced (NOT enchanted - enhanced. For agricultural purposes!) forest, ever-so-creatively named the Tallwoods! The Tallwoods was a █████ Single-Man Effort caused by the tireless and intensive work of ████ one of the brightest young minds in the magical field, ████████████ and Brantley Rosenberg!

Okay, so the main event that caused this was after the project was complete, and Brantley (after rising significantly in status after basically doubling the kingdom's economy) goes to the king himself. Brantley then complains to said king about women in magic because he sucks. He complains about miscellaneous feminine influences by female 'subordinates' of his which basically effed up the Tallwoods. It was still good, but it could've been great. He then goes on to talk about how this effect was reflected in the Tallwoods, but felt in the entire magical field. King then gets pissed off and outlaws female magic, which then gets a new name, witchcraft. Magicians weren't just Mages anymore. Men were Mages, and women were witches.

OKAY, THATS IT!!! I hope I answered your questions :3 THANK YOU FOR ASKING I APPRECIATE IT <3333

[ectoimp]

I was thinking how you sometimes see people say "Man i wish Arthur wasnt always the butt of the joke" or implying that hes the only one picked on in canon. Especially after that update a while ago with Arthur fainting.

But...in canon he isnt? Like the physical comedy is pretty evenly spread, except to maybe mystery.

Lewis gets sandwich faced, Arthur gets bonked by his laptop, Shiro gets her head flung and hit by the van, Lewis gets hit with a truck,Vivi gets bonked by a bat, both Vivi and Arthur are unconscious after the van crashes, Lance gets knocked out, Arthur drops into a pile of boxes, both Lewis and Arthur get exploded in the truck.

Like....Arthurs really not picked on in the videos and hes not really unconscious more then anyone else. Even taking in not comedic injurys, they are probably about equal there as well, at least in number. Lewis obviously got the worst non comedic injury, but also Vivi got a nasty slash, Shiros body is gone (im assuming her anchor being fine means shes not dead), Mystery got slashed and is possibly dying/dead, then of course Arthurs arm.

Now in Fanon...thats a whole other ball game. Arthur is absolutely picked on there lol I just find the perception of Arthur very interesting, especially since if you really look at who get the worst stuff happening to them most often? Its probably Lewis, not Arthur. What if the reason Arthur clings to Lewis in the cave isnt because hes scared of getting hurt....but that hes scared of Lewis getting hurt. Maybe the one most accident prone was actually Lewis, not Arthur. Maybe Arthur even warned Lewis “your gonna get yourself killed one of these days” and after Lewis’ death this seems to him more like a threat then just a warning to be more careful.

[feline-evil]

So! A lot of stuff happened yesterday regarding Deviantart and a lot of information that was being spread was inaccurate and fear-mongering, and while i do not think the site is wholly perfect nor that they didn’t make mistakes i do want to try and put a post out there talking about what was present there and where people were mistaken! The journal has now been changed as has Deviantarts NOAI system (for the better i must add!!) but lets look at what was present for people to see when the discussion kicked off! I’m putting it below a cut because its long but please do read, i do want to try and combat misinformation and fearmongering, and do my best to reassure people while also pointing out what ARE missteps and mistakes on Deviantarts part!

First of all let me be clear, do not agree with AI art, do not think DA should have their own AI, do not think they should allow AI submissions at all. But. Lets get on to what was written on this journal BEFORE they updated it to what it is now:

IMPORTANT:

DeviantArt did not, does not, and will not use deviations submitted to DeviantArt to add to third-party AI models or training sets, or on DreamUp itself.

DeviantArt did not consent to third-party technology usage of images on our site, which were used to train AI models. In an effort to combat future unauthorized usage, we have enacted “noai” — an industry-first directive alerting AI models of deviants' desires to opt out.

DeviantArt is the only platform giving creators the ability to tell third-party AI datasets and models whether or not their content can be used for training. This is a protection for creators to help them safeguard their content across the web.

We encourage other platforms who enable creators to publish their work to implement similar protections. We are making our “noai” directive available for use by all.

You will notice in this section the first two bulletpoints. Bulletpoint one explicitly states they are not using your art to upload and add to third party AI, AI training, or even their own AI. This is stated several times throughout this post! The opting out of ai usage does not mean if you do not have that checkmarked ticked they use your art for this, no, it is in fact about checking on a code that prevents what is ALREADY HAPPENING AND HAS BEEN SINCE THE INFANCY OF AI ART THEFT. Which is that sites trawl deviantart for art to use and usernames to acquire for prompts people can shove into their horrid ai programs. Deviantart has nothing to do with this, and states here they do not have any desire to submit your deviations to this. Right now, before this update, your art already was subject to AI and they were not doing that and had no control over it! Sorry to be the bearer of bad news but most the fear-mongering is about something that. Is already happening. Not having the checkmark that says 'i do not wish to have my art used for ai' does not make it any worse, thats just status quo, same as it ever was. So no. Not checking that on does not mean you are now allowing your art to be taken by AI and that it wasn't being before. It means things stay as they are. Which again, your art was already subject to AI, this was not going to make it any worse.

Bullet point two! Deviantart clarifies that, since they do know and are aware of how many highly popular artists currently on the site have been targeted by ai in the past, they have had no sayin this! Which is why they have come out with this update, to try and combat this! This update was not about allowing AI to access your art, it was the complete opposite.

There are several points within this journal that clarify this over again, when they talk about that checkbox stopping ai from using your art they are NOT saying it aill be used if you dont, only that it is the status quo of them having no control over this and that they are not selling nor giving out your art to AI because they do not consent to that and neither do you. There was never a plan listed here to allow that to happen. The username opt out is also aiming at software that is ALREADY AND HAS BEEN FOR AGES using peoples Deviantart usernames to generate art in their style! Not opting out does not mean deviantart automatically goes 'oh yes you can use this person now here you go art theft machines!' It means the code they have made and invented now isnt applied to your account, so you have the same level of protection that you have had for years before this journal! Which is that, yes, AI of any kind could and had for many high profile artists scalped their work and style! Which, yes, sucks so very much!! But i do not think representing this as not opting out makes this any worse is accurate, it will just stay the same; bad. This doesn’t mean not having it be opt out as default was a great move, of course, i’m not saying that.

Now. Do i think everything they did was good? No. They should not be involved in making an AI system, even one that is more ethical as they seem to be trying to make theirs;  Not rolling out their AI defence system as automatically you are given their new defence toggled on as default was also a misstep, but people i believe were fear-mongering far more than was helpful for artists trying to understand what was happening to a platform they use; same as the need for a mass toggle opt-out for pre existing deviations. Not because without that defence on and that toggled not off your art would be more susceptible to AI than it had been before! Again, cannot stress enough that was clearly never stated and that they state the opposite! It is still bad that the username out was not set automatically, it should've been opted out by default, again i am not defending that i think it was a misstep that undercuts the vastly positive changes they were bringing about, as was dipping their toes into AI in the first place. But, within hours they changed that. It is now opt out by default, and there is a mass system for previous deviations, they have listened and updated their system! This is good, this is a good thing, these protections they are implementing are good; while im sure third party software may still wriggle around, there's truly not much we or deviantart can do if that happens; this is a step forward for the site! This is good progress! They are still making a mistake allowing AI art on the site at all and having their own AI system, but truly a lot of what was mentioned in this journal was not what people were saying it was at all, there was an intense level of misinformation being spread that clearly went against several important bulletpoints mentioned several times in this journal. I am of the belief they should drop their AI software entirely, and that AI art should be not permitted on site, but i do commend them for actually attempting to give artists more power over an already prevalent issue. I'm not dick sucking here, i fully believe in holding the site accountable for their mistakes, but i do not think fear-mongering and misrepresenting information is helpful for anybody, hence why i am rambling in this post.

So TLDR: Your deviations were already subject to the things people were fearmongering about before the opt in/out system. Yes deviantart has made mistakes in getting involved in ai art and i am not defending their creation and allowing use of their own system. Yes they made a mistake not flagging everything as opt out as default but that has been rectified. No they were never planning to scalp all your previous deviations and give them to ai, that was already happening without their control or say, you had been opted in for years with deviantart having no say nor power over that, because AI art is art theft on a massive scale. Do i want to go on the line in saying Deviantart will never change their stance and might fuck this up worse and undo all the extremely good things they have implemented? No, i don’t work there and i’m not affiliated with them. My goal here is, to the best of my abilities (not claiming to be an expert i have just read through the post several times), purely to point out things that were misrepresentated in the immediate reaction to this update, so that people can make a better informed decision on their feelings and support of the site. This was a flawed introduction of a very good and helpful system, and it’s a shame that A) deviantart also tarred it with making their own AI, and that B) people misrepresented the facts of what was announced, because this NOAI is a really good thing that is being implemented. That is all.

(Also don’t come here to argue with me about wether AI art is good or bad, you are not going to sway me into being positive about it; i have very strong beliefs about it and i am not here to argue nor debate.)

[prpledusk]

PSA: Kids please fucking stop.

In regards to recent events I just wanna go ahead and make something clear about where I stand on certain subjects, I dont have a lot of followers and for all I know I might actually lose a couple by writing this but eh. Fuck it, its tumblr.

So my oppinion when it comes to children the internet. Kids are fucking stupid.

I say that not to be mean spirited but more in the sense of "Kids do stupid shit when given the power of anonymity."

Specifically they do stupid shit when it comes to nsfw content.

Throughout my time on Discord and tumblr Ive come across muiltible sitations involving both children and adults as well as controversial and nsfw content, from a child lying about their age to gain access to said content, to adults posting minor/adult content under mine and my friends noses, to someone actually attempting to groom a minor. Its the Kingdom hearts fandom, we've had problems with preditors, and people spreading things like noncon fics since the early 2000's! Put simpley Ive seen some shit. And have a zero tolerance when it comes to Minors on the internet for reasons dealing with experience and also for the fact that I have a daughter and plan to teach her Internet safety when she becomes of age.

So here's a few bits of advice to help those in the fandom and maybe to assist in understanding why children shouldnt be posting or activly participating and comtributing nsfw content.

Children are not permitted to post pornographic content online. Ya'll can write and draw it sure but do not share it or post it online. Its illegal and can get you in serious trouble.

Do not write noncon as it not only helps in the spread of rapeculture but its insulting to actual victems, especially in cases where you may not be cappable of understanding things like nuance or lack the world experience that would tell you w h y its bad. To top it off, most of the time these fics are written by children whove never hhadto experience such a thing and see it as just an edgy way to get their kicks which again, just rubs salt in the wound.

Kids dont have to tell you their age, but if ever theres something that requires age identification simpley say "I identify as an adult/minor". Or just dont identify at all and stay away from adult areas. Easy peasy kill me pleasy.

If someone says "no" or "Im uncomfertable" please. Back the fuck off. End of discussion.

Do not post, contribute, or even dabble in minor/adult things. Yes Im looking at you Akuroku fans. I wish you all a very perish. By comtributing any minor/adult ships all your doing is helping pedophilia and MAPs become more normalized and for a minor online that is definatly not a good because it increases the chances of you becoming a VICTEM of those people.

The amount of times I had to call out adults for thinking theres nothing wrong with minor/adult things is staggering and I want to swallow glass and grind my own bones because of it, but its worth it if it makes a safer inviroment for the children around you. That being said, adults reading this: call that shit out. You obviously dont have to if you dont want to but you'll be shocked how many people you end up helping because of it.

If a minor has been getting nsfw from you, block them and cease contact. Its really the best thing you can do, and Minors? Please dont interract with adult artists and writers, you wont face any consiquence for getting nsfw from an adult but the adult can be legally charged with distribution of porn to a minor you have the potential to ruin someones life and you do not want that on your conscience.

Kids? Please do NOT share porn with other kids? Thats distribution of porn to a minor, which a minor can be charged with.

This list may be subject to update but ya'll get the picture. Back when I was a kid I made a lot of mistakes and yes even I wrote some things that I wish I never did but the difference is I kept it all PRIVATE. I made certain that Only I ever saw that stuff and never ever posted any of it publicly, and dammit it hurts to see kids who already remind me of myself when I was younger make those same mistakes within the same fandom no less.

I remember demyx time and how it consistantly made noncon jokes at the expense of minor characters, I remember Saix puppys :You got served! and how the characters where constantly sexually harassed and molested for the funnies,

I remember the near constant stream of noncon fics and how NO ONE was ever calling out this behavior in the fandom but times have changed. The fandoms changed and most of those kids have grown up and are now highly against all of that bullshit from the past and are currently calling out shit behavior and irresponsible posting but thanks to those mistakes of the past kids today see things like pressuring people into things they dont want, gaslighting, guilt tripping, and streight up minor/adult ships are fine and should even accepted. Hell proshippings apparently a thing and the more I think about that the more I get the Frenzy status.

I want this fandom to be safe. I want peoplr to come to my blogs and feel safe. I want people to talk to me and feel. Safe.

So I guess hopefully people read this and try to understand the basic do's and donts of being a kid on the internet.

In conclusion

Kids need to practice basic internet safety and creepy adults need to fuck off into the abyss.

[soft4gguk]

Tessa ure back and it made me saur happy <3 i always wanna leave a good review but i always struggled a lot hwever this is my fav chapter so ill try!! first i miss yuuu so much. i cant deny i hav my fave writers before tbah came to me. apparantly theyre mia but then i saw ur blog. like the fic itself, u build a home in this hidden world of tumblr. u rebuild a safe space for me xx

i engulfed myself w some bad boy jk fics while waiting to ur update and god my hopes in men almost drowning and thank u for saving it!! secondly,,, despite tbah jaykay not sayying the L word idk i still trust him?? (or maybe bc i trust u) most fics i read were always one sided so it's like walking on an iceberg.. but u gave us assurance by showing his pov so maybe thats why and thank u for that!!

next,,how could u make simple interaction between them so meaningful?! i cant word this right opposing to how u wrote it. but i could really feel the strong emotions they hav between the lines?? gosh i cant thank u enough. im always in awe to ur writing its so smart and every line gave resonance (imagine me putting highlights to all sentencs lmao) aaand! the smut was IMMACULATE..i never visioned "making love" this perfect. very clear, full of romance, u nailed it!

alsoo :(( while reading the fic i hav this thought oc's personality is a reflection of u in rl. i feel guilty for being smitten but i think ure a really sweet person! just like someone i could easily trust my whole life the first time i met them. i hope everything works your way n wishing u always the best <33

anyways.. the journal scene is absolutely my favorite! so lemme leave this scene here-------

“Write about me.” He winks, sending a troop of butterflies straight to your chest, spreading like wildfire all through you – ever so weak for him. You hand him the bag you were previously holding – the one that stores the journal you’d originally bought. “Here.” He grabs it, confused but soft as he smiles. “I don’t know what to write about, though.” You smile, taking one step towards him, closing the distance as you look up at him, eyes indecisive as they scan his own before traveling down to his lips.

You shrug, your gaze growing so sweet. “Me.”

hiiii 🥺 first off, I want to say that this ask felt like a big, warm hug from u to me and I can't even begin to express my gratitude for it. it put such a big smile on my face that I'm unsure ill be able to shake off for the remainder of the day, so thank you so much. I hope you know I'm sending that love right back to you and multiplied.

I love your feedback so much and your name is one I look forward to receiving on my inbox so even if its one sentence or a bunch of paragraphs, please send them if it strikes you <3 thank you. I trust him too!!! I think that something very beautiful happens when we take people out of pedestals and simply accept them as flawed humans - in a way, that's what I want to portray with both jungkook and oc in this story. and even with his parents and anyone that might strike controversy in the storyline at times. a couple of chapters back oc said it herself beautifully, "love is understanding."

its so sweet of you to find me in her - I guess in a way, there's a little bit of me in all of the characters to some extent, whether big or small and oc is one I enjoy writing a lot so it flatters me that you'd say that <3 thank uuuu.

oh man, oh man... that chapter bit really got me too 🥺 I love him so much for that. imagine someone doing that for u!!!! it'd fall in love right then and there hehe.

im so glad u enjoyed!!!! and I truly am sending you so much love and life and a million kisses paired with a million hugs!!!! I love you. I hope you're able to keep finding a safe space in this little corner of the internet. xx

[if-the-crown-fits-translate-it]

Discord pt 27

[Date: 20/02, 4.45 PM - 20/02, 08.48 PM GMT]

[Direct continuation of Discord pt 26]

echoza tumblr: “what do you mean?”

knight: “Well. There has to be a reason you all kept calling me Fetch last night. Even though I'm not Fetch. I don't even know who Fetch is! what... What happened to Fetch to make you all so sad?”

echoza tumblr: “We haven't seen him in a while, and you reminded us of him... You probably shouldn't worry about it too much”

knight: “How did i remind you of him? Do we look alike? Wait- you didn't know what I looked like...”

Ethan: “Your discord mannerisms reminded us of him, we thought you were fetch coming back to us”

knight: “Oh. Sorry to disappoint you... :(”

knight: “Do you think i can help look for him? i can ask crown if he knows where fetch went!”

echoza tumblr: “It's probably best not to. We... don't want to risk anything.“

knight: “...risk?”

CypressBoo: “We can trust Fetch to come back to us eventually. Fetch is a person, and everyone needs space from their own family sometimes. There are a lot of us, after all. Being with so many people all the time can tire a person out!”

knight: “Does fetch get tired easily?”

CypressBoo: “Everyone gets tired. We should let each other recharge our batteries every once in a while.”

knight: “I suppose. well, if you all care about fetch then so do I! I'll keep an eye out for any signs of him ;) For now, just put on your crowns and smiles. Ranboo deserves to feel welcome in our family!”

knight: “👑:)”

[Everyone starts sending 👑:)]

knight: “Do you have any more questions? I’d love for you all to get to know me better.”

CypressBoo: “Sure thing! What do you do in your free time? Any hobbies?”

knight: “I like to draw! Maybe I can post some in your art channel. You're all very talented!”

CypressBoo: “That would be wonderful! The artists in this family are very talented indeed.”

knight: “Oh! Terribly sorry, but I have to go! Big smiles everybody! :)”

[Everyone say their goodbyes. Prince enters shortly after]

Prince: “Just stopping by to wish everyone a happy smile day! :)”

[Prince sends 7, 2 then 6 smiles]

[Bea: “Happy smile day to you too! How are you feeling today?”]

Prince: “I'm so happy! :)”

Prince: “I have to go now, but i'll try to come back soon okay? :)”

[At this point, Ranboo is live]

page: “Hello my friends!”

page: “Ah very sorry I need a moment to quickly finish doing something my friends!”

page: “:)”

[Everyone starts sending smiles]

knight: “:)

I'm not here to talk. Just spreading smiles.

:)”

knight: “Lovely lovely smiles you all have! Crown will be delighted.”

spectral: “Ok! Our message was drowned out tho... (:”

knight: “Keep it up! He's bound to see at least one of us smile.”

[Viscount joins sometime later]

Viscount: “Hello! I just wanted to drop in quickly :)”

Viscount: “How are you all enjoying smile day? :)”

[No |Stars: “Vis do you remember the conversation last night?”]

Viscount: “Hmm..? I'm not sure,.. What you mean,,,?”

[Viscount’s morse code spells ‘I D O’]

knight: “Hello! popping in along with viscount for a short moment. I forgot to tell you a little detail about my "fit check", and I know how you artists love to have the details! :)”

knight: “I may not have a tail like this "fetch" did, but I have floppy blue ears! crown made them blue because i can look like my google doc :)”

[Little-K1ng: “oh thats so cute.... lil floppy dog ears...”]

knight: “Dogs scare me but my ears are cute :) besides who's ever head of a blue dog?”

Little-K1ng: “your dog ears are very cute knight :) i hope the dying didnt stain too much around the ears

Little-K1ng: “what a weird coincidence, fetch did really love blues clues (a show about a blue dog!)“

knight: “Just a couple wispy hairs, nothing that can be hidden easily! Crown makes sure I look as prim and proper (snazzy, as you all say) as I can be! Such a kind one that crown guy :)”

[Jack/Anthony: “How have you been enjoying smile day, vis?”]

Viscount: “It's been wonderful! :) I only wanted to stop by shortly to ensure you all were enjoying today as much as we are! :)”

knight: “Yes yes!! Smile day is going great! :)”

Viscount: “:)”

knight: “:)”

[Everyone starts sending “:)”]

[No |Stars: “,,.thats,,,good,,,I guess,..”]

Viscount: “Alright :)”

knight: “Anyways, I'll be trotting off! Just wanted to update my "fit check" :)”

[kate: “Uh... Viscount? Are we cool after yesterday? I'm still sorry for what happened and how I acted.”]

Viscount: “everything is alright, kate. I trust you to make the right decisions :)”

Viscount: “I will also be heading out, busy busy day today after all :) Have a happy smile day everyone! :)”

Viscount: “:)”

knight:  “:)”

page: “:)”

[Everyone starts sending smiles]

[planetariumx]

A Stupid Love Story {Pt. 5/?}

Loki x reader (eventual)

Chapter Summary: Loki keeps sending you on terrible dates and you are sick of it.

Warnings: (forgot to do this when I first posted, my bad) asshole guys, swearing, one guy tries to cop a feel but nothing happens

A/N: lmao remember when I wrote stuff? yeah me neither. I have not updated this story in 6 months yikes thats half a year my dudes I’m very sorry, I procrastinate a lot. But I’m hoping to finish this up, I’ve had a streak of inspiration and I really wanna get this done :) also the chapters will be longer than they have been! I think this one is a little over 1k words, enjoy!

Masterlist

Part 4

It was hours later when Loki finally returned. You had been sound asleep on the couch when you were startled awake by someone shaking you. You mumbled something unintelligible and weakly slapped the hand away from you but it was persistent and instead moved to poking your forehead repeatedly until you opened your eyes. Of course it was Loki, is he ever not annoying? 

“You have taken the couch so unless you wish for me to sleep in your bed, I suggest you get up.” He did not look as angry as you expected, odd.

“Gross” was all you sleepily muttered before not-so-gracefully sliding off the couch and trudging to your room.

~~~

In the morning when you awoke, Loki wasn’t in the apartment. You briefly felt a wave of concern wash over you before pushing that back into a box in the back of your mind where it belongs. You had just started to look for something to eat when you heard the door to the apartment open and then close softly. Great, now someone was breaking into your home. Could this weekend get any worse?

Fearing the worst, you grab a knife from the kitchen and try to make it back to your room where you could get your phone to call for help. You were almost through the door when a cold hand grabbed your arm and pulled to turn you around. You yelped and blindly swung the knife forward but your wrist was easily caught before the blade made contact.

“I’m impressed by your attempt, though weak and unsuccessful, it was an attempt.” The monotone voice you’ve come to know speaks. Loki. Your eyes flew open and you glared into the green-blue ones staring back at you, you could tell he was smirking just by looking at his stupid, pretty eyes that you could easily get lost in- nope stop that right there. 

“You scared the shit out of me! I thought you were an intruder here to kill me!” You tried to punch him in the chest but it didn’t seem to hurt him at all. Stupid Asgardian strength. 

“I brought food.” Was all he said, letting go of you and stepping back so your flailing arms couldn’t reach him. 

“You- what?”

“Food. I went out in search of food that was actually edible. This is the best I could find on this horrid planet.” Sure he was still highly insulting but it was still kind of sweet right? 

“Ok then, what did you get?” You asked as you made your way to the kitchen. He didn’t answer but you saw an assortment of pastries from the bakery down the street spread on the kitchen counter. As much as you hated to admit it, it was very thoughtful and your mouth was watering. 

Breakfast passed in mostly silence, a few words about the food were spoken here and there. Surprisingly, Loki seemed to enjoy the food as well. Not a single insult was said at the quality of the pastries. That’s a win for Earth. 

Later, he informed you that he had found someone for you, some guy who happened to work in the same building as you. You had a date tonight at a fancy restaurant. Hopefully this would work out and you would never have to see or think about the frustratingly handsome yet rude god of mischief again. 

~~~

Saying that the date didn’t go so well would be the understatement of the year. He talked about himself the whole time, not once asking you anything about yourself, and then abruptly said he had to leave because he was going to hook up with his ex. Leaving you to pay the bill. Fantastic. You were fuming when you stomped back to your apartment, slamming the door behind you and startling the cause of your terrible date who was once again sitting on the couch reading some book he found. 

“Thanks a lot, Loki. Really picked a winner there didn’t you?” You glared at him, kicking off your heels and crossing your arms over your chest, trying to look intimidating.

“Did it not go well?” He had the nerve to ask, he seemed amused at your situation. You weren’t even going to entertain that question, he knew very well how it went. “Did you at least try to get along?” He asked you

“Excuse me? Did I try? You did not just ask me that.” You were about ready to slap him at this point but you knew it probably wouldn’t faze him. You didn’t want to look at him any more so you stormed off to your room and slammed the door again. 

~~~

You didn’t speak to Loki for the rest of the week, barely even looked at him. Were you being dramatic? Maybe. Did you care? Absolutely not. At least he had to sense not to bother you. That was until Friday night when he told you, very last minute, that you had another date that night. You grumbled the entire time you were getting ready, making it to the restaurant ten minutes later then you were supposed to.

This time, the guy didn’t say anything about himself and kept asking you increasingly more concerning questions about yourself. You cut it off before it could get any worse and practically ran out to get a cab home.

The next night, Loki had yet another date set up for you and you were getting tired of this. But you still decided to go to the bar, at least you could get a drink.

You were already in a terrible mood when you arrived so when the asshole started feeling you up and wouldn’t take no for an answer, you were seething. 

“If you don’t take your fucking hand off of me right now I will cut it off.” You growled at the man. You could see the surprise and fear cross his face before he swiftly got up and left. At least that was over with. You told the bartender to put your drink on the guy’s tab and then left. 

You didn’t even spare a glance in Loki’s direction when you got home. So fed up with his bullshit that you thought you might actually strangle him if he opens his mouth. 

You took a scalding hot shower to wash the feeling of that creep’s hands off of you and then crawled into bed.

~~~~

When you were in the kitchen the next morning, you could sense Loki walking up next to you and before he could say anything, you spoke

“No. Don’t even start. I’m done with this, I don’t care if you get thrown back in prison, I don’t care if you were supposed to help me. You have done nothing but make my life worse and sent me on some of the worst dates of my life and I’m sick of it. And for some sick reason you seem to enjoy my pain. Get the fuck out of my apartment or I’ll tell the avengers that you’re here.” So maybe that was an empty threat, you weren’t really sure how to contact them but it couldn’t be that difficult could it? It didn’t matter though, Loki seemed to take the hint and disappeared before your eyes. And for some insane reason, you missed him.

Part 6

[wildly-lost-lantern]

Promise

A/N: Hi guys. I’m sorry this isn’t a SPS update, but I was inspired. This is something, at least. I hope you guys like it! I wrote this for one of my faves on this site, as well. Please please please tell me what you think! And here to you, @actuallythatwaspromise  I hope you enjoy.

Genre: Fluff, smut, established relationship au

Words: 1100+

Warnings: Unprotected sex, morning sex, oral (fem receiving), uhm?? I think thats it lol

Pairing: Jongho x reader

That morning, you woke because you were having trouble breathing. You found the source of your troubles as your boyfriend. He sometimes came across as scary or tough, but you knew the truth. He was just a huge softy. He frequently would speak in pout if he had a long day. He had a smile that could like up a city. A man with many facial expressions, some designed to make you laugh. Choi Jongho was the definition of duality. He was also the love of your life.

"Wake up, sleepy. I can't breath," you said softly, afraid to break the gentle atmosphere of the morning. With a few pokes to his cheeks, he woke.

"Why are you poking me? Babe, it's so early," he whined as he moved around in the bed beside you. You stifled a giggle as his hair stuck up in different directions.

"Babe, you were squishing me," you explained, rolling over so your head was on his chest instead. He simply murmured in response, drawing lazy shapes on your skin. You couldn't help but shiver slightly, your skin slightly sensitive from just waking up.

"It's a beautiful morning, ____. Would you like me to make you some coffee? Tea? Or should I just get some water?" He asked softly, looking down at your face that was glowing in the early morning light.

"No, I just wanna lay here a little while longer," You whispered back, looking up at him. He looked like an angel in the soft lighting. Jongho nodded before leaning in to give you a soft kiss. Your lips molded to his, it was a gentle yet passionate kiss that stole your breath and gave you butterflies.

"I love you, _____," he started as he pulled away from you. He rolled you over onto your back, kissing the top of your chest, just under your collar bones. "Let me treat you like the queen you are?" He looked up at you from underneath his dark lashes, his voice dropping an octave in lust. All you could do is nod.

He started by slowly removing your top, caressing your body as if you were made of glass. His hands trailed over your skin, leaving goose bumps in their wake. He always knew how to push your buttons in the best way. He gently cupped each of your breasts, kissing the top of each one, before moving to kiss above your navel. The first time he had seen you without a proper shirt, you had been embarrassed to the point of discomfort. Jongho quickly showed you just how beautiful you are in his eyes. He loved your body, no matter what others might say. He licked a slow stripe from your belly button up to the center of your chest, making you shudder in pure pleasure.

"I love you, Jongho.. Please, make love to me," you whispered, gently grabbing one of his hands to intertwine your fingers. He smirked at you before kissing you again, just as passionately as before. His free hand trailed down your side to your hips, giving the flesh there a gentle squeeze.

"As you wish, love," he said as he pulled away from you. He removed his hand from yours and rubbed your stomach, hips, and thighs before gripping the waist of your sleep shorts and panties and pulling them down slowly. Before he went back to you, he removed his own clothes as well, giving you a small show as his muscles rippled with every movement. Before you could blink, he was back on top of you, gladly taking care of you.

He gently gripped your thick thighs, coaxing you to spread your legs for him. You happily obliged. He took his time, kissing a trail along each thigh before his lips connected with your core. A soft whimper fell from your lips as you pushed your fingers into his hair. He licked slowly, every motion of his tongue a calculated move, knowing just how to get you wet and ready for him. One hand drew shapes on the sensitive skin on the underside of your breast as the other held your thigh gently. His tongue circled your clit, humming softly as your taste took over his senses. He slipped his hand from your chest, just to push a finger into you. He pumped into you languidly, relishing in the soft moans and mewls that fell from your pretty lips. He added a finger, pressing against the spot that drives you to an orgasm faster than anything you've done before. Giving you a few more deep thrusts and gentle licks, he pulled away from your cunt. He licked his fingers clean, smiling at your dazed state.

Just before you could beg him to do anything else, he entered you in a slow, deep thrust. A groan rumbled deep in his chest as he rested his forehead against yours. His thrusts started out slow and deep, but soon they started to speed up.

"God, you feel so good around me," he groaned out before leaning back to watch your breasts bounce with every hard thrust. Your lips were parted, moans falling out in increasing volume. You gripped one of his shoulders, pulling him back to you for a deep and rough kiss. He gripped your supple hips tightly, fucking into you faster and harder.

"Yes, like that baby," you moaned out as his grip tightened. He grinned at you with his devastatingly beautiful smile. Your mind was hazy, the knot in your stomach tightening quickly.

"Fuck, you're so gorgeous, laid out like this for me," he groaned, taking one hand to between your thighs to play with your clit. He felt your cunt tighten around his cock as a deep moan escaped you.

"I'm gonna, fuck, come," you groaned out, head thrown back in pleasure. His only response was a deep moan, his hips quickening. "Fuck, yes!" you cried out as you writhed beneath him. You came with his name falling from your lips, your cunt tightening once again. He followed soon after, before you even came down from your high. He rested against you slightly, catching his breath.

"I love you, ____," he said, kissing your lips gently. He got up and started a bath, waiting until it was ready before helping you into the tub. The two of you sat there, in each others arms, just enjoying the morning sun.

"I love you, Jongho," you whispered to him. He simply squeezed your hand, kissing your temple. Nothing more needed to be said. So, you leaned back against him, enjoying the warm water and your loving boyfriend.

[mysmedrabbles]

Another Place [Yoosung Kim]

from the Fourth Wall breaking series

quote contributors: 2 anons and @thedujifuji (submissions bolded, will not be posting the actual asks)

a/n: welcome back to hell i’ll be your tour guide,, finally posting these after only 19 years!! Hope you guys enjoy!

warnings: big sad

-7th wall mod alex

`

`

`

       It was the late night chats that were always the loneliest. Staring up into the bleak cracked ceiling, you traced the shadows cast by the moon outside with your eyes, the empty feeling filling you yet again... a void that demanded to be felt no matter the cost. It was times like these, under the cover of darkness where you were left alone with your thoughts, a yearning so deep you could swear you would unravel, leaving nothing but the shell of the person you once was.

       Man this game was fucking you up.

       Rolling on your side, you checked you phone, the bright light assaulting your eyes. Able to distinguish the time, you made your way to the Mystic Messenger app. Two minutes to 2 am. Ten minutes until you could sleep.

`

       With the cheery tune of the opening screen, a smile couldn't help but find its way to your face, an almost giddy sensation filling the previous void you’d longed to be filled, an otherworldly feel as you surveyed the winnings of the latest Honey Buddha Chip package on your screen. Not much, but enough for a call perhaps? A call to a certain golden haired boy? 

       One more minute until the chatroom opened.

` 

       Your eyes surveyed the screen yet again, looking for something to do to pass the ever stretching seconds, when the familiar ring of a phone call echoed through your room. A call. From Yoosung. A glitch? Weren’t calls supposed to happen after chatrooms? 

       Without thinking you pressed answer, the smiling face the blonde avatar bore fading away as the call subtitles took its place. 

`

      “Hello?” his voice was higher than usual, almost panicked, and yet you could feel your heart flip in your chest as his voice struck you, a small bit of reality you had left. “Hello?” came Yoosungs voice again, voice cracking near the end. “Damn it, damn it.” you heard him mutter from the other end. 

       You expected a chatbox to pop up, to respond, but nothing came, nothing but silence as the incoherent muttering came from far away on the other end. You listened intently... would anything happen? What kind of glitch was this? 

       “Hel-damn it, Seven said this would work- Hello?”

       Cheritz? Answer box please?? 

`

       You heard a deep breath on the other end, and you could almost imagine Yoosung closing his eyes as he calmed himself, one hand gripping the table to keep himself steady as the other held his phone to his ear. 

      “Hello? I- MC... that’s... thats not your real name is it. I dont know... if you can hear me, I’m praying Seven could do that for me.. I-Mc-” his voice wavered dangerously, trying his best to collect himself before he continued, his voice weaker than before, “If you can hear me... please.. say something-i- let me know you’re there.”

       Were you supposed to... answer? It felt silly, replying to the emptiness, saying something that would immediately be swallowed by the dark, but it also felt wrong to sit there doing nothing, waiting vainly for a chat box to appear. Maybe it was a new update.

       “...Hello?”

Silence.

       Just as you moved to end call, Yoosung spoke again, his voice drawn to a hush, as if he were afraid to break the fine glass line separating the two of your worlds. “You're..you’re real,” he breathed, defenses down as he himself clutched his phone desperately with both hands, pressing the device as close to his ear as he could before continuing, “I thought- that you were just a character on a screen I never- there’s so much I need to tell you, so much that-”

       “Yoosung?” was all you could muster, your mind blank at the reality you were facing, until the only thing that could be heard was your heartbeat pounding in your ears, distorting the silence of your room.

       “-And I don’t know how much time we- yes?”

There was so much you wanted to say to him...

       “Thank you,” you started. Whether this was real or not, you weren’t going to pass up an opportunity to talk to him. The idea that this might have just been another simulation broke your heart, but these were quickly rushed away when you looked down at the continuing phone call, remembering Yoosung on the other end.

       His rambling was cut by your thanks, confusing him, it was he who should be thanking you, not the other way around, he started to respond, but you beat him to it, “Yoosung I- in- in you I saw so much of myself; I was,” you took a deep breath before continuing, “so lost, wanting to move forward but so afraid to let go of the past. You showed me,” a crack in your voice as tears threatened to swallow you whole, emotions you hadn’t known you even had rising rapidly to the surface, “You showed me that it's possible to move forward even after you've lost your way. You have helped me and shown me far more kindness than anyone else ever did when I was at my lowest point and because of you I want to be a better per..son with ... every passing day.”

       You finished with a flustered breath, heat suddenly rushing to your cheeks as you realized your declaration, completely our of character from your usual stoic self. This was a game. You declared your love to... someone who wasn’t even real. The shame of idiocy spread through your chest the longer he stayed silent, only his own heavy breathing heard on the other end. 

`

       Taking a second to bring himself back together, Yoosung tried to ignore the warmth spreading through his body, heart and gut synchronized in a flustered dance, both struggling to keep up with the racing of his mind. It didn’t seem real, that the person he’d inevitably loved- continued to fall in love with day after day, was real, not just a character made up by Seven, a virus in the app.

`

       You heard a small giggle from Yoosung, making your heart soar. You could almost imagine his face, violet eyes shining with the threat of tears, blush adorning a smiling expression as he vainly tried to hide his face in his hands, too embarrassed by the way your words stripped him of rationality, touched him in a way where he’d lost all functionality, enraptured by your voice, by you. 

       A smile made its way onto your face as you continued, set to get everything you’d wanted to say out in the open, “You’re amazing and I just, I love you so much and I wish, I wish more guys were like you in this world. You’re so, soft, amazing, artistic, and an excellent cook? The omurice will never stop looking delicious.”

       To this he finally had a response, “It was! It was delicious! If I send you the recipe will you promise to make it?”

       “Of course.”

       “I’ll see if I can text it to you! You won't Believe the things I went through to get to this point, good thing it was worth it in the end! Being with you is always worth it..” 

       He was rambling, and the initial tenseness of the first meet shaken off as his infectious laughter filled the receiver, voice bright with excitement as he went on about the other recipes he tried in his spare time, the ones he’d always wanted to make one day for you... the ones he never could.

`

       His voice started to crack, static becoming more and more prominent as his voice was broken by what? Bad cell service? The fact that you were talking across dimensions? 

       Yoosung could be heard getting sad, his tone dropping, a melancholic need for you filling his head, suffocating him with thoughts of you. He paused his words, starting anew. “MC I... I’m sorry I think... we’re running out of time but before I go I just... I need to tell you... gah why is this so hard.”

A pause.

       “I love you... truly. You showed me kindness when there was no one who believed in me, and it’s because of your love that I’m still alive.. that I have something worth living for. Every time you play my route...” the static got worse, ripping a few words from his sentence, actively trying to separate the two of you as he went on, “...I wish I could protect you forever, make you as happy as you make me.. I wish we had more t- I wish we had more time. There’s so much I want to ask you, so much I’m sure you want to ask. Please, no matter what.. stay happy for me.”

Well...actually.. I do have one serious question for you... Yoosung Kim: does Yoosung Kim is bi?” you chuckled cautiously, a weight lifted as you heard his broken up giggle in response, and for a second you could almost believe that everything would be okay.

The static got louder, cutting in between Yoosung’s words, only fragments of a, “well - lov- ou so,- h-pe s-,” were able to be made, connection weakening, Yoosung’s presence fading away.

`

`

Tapping on the phone, where you were praying for some sort of relief, you were only met with a blank screen, his voice gone, leaving a gaping hole where he’d buried himself into your heart.

`

`

Gone.

`

`

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