#with everyone else just there as jane's plot demands

[fictionadventurer]

People Jane could have asked for help when she wanted to leave Thornfield, instead of just running out into the wilderness with a piece of bread and some money that she spent entirely on bus fare:

Mrs. Fairfax: Didn't know Rochester was married, would understand that Jane wants to leave. Could possibly provide a loan to help Jane travel to where she needs to go, or at least direct her to other people who could help.

Mr. Eyre/Mr. Mason/the lawyer: Sure, her uncle's dying, and his employees just left her there, but they might not be that far from Thornfield. Could be nearby, or could be reachable by letter if inquiries were made.

Mr. Rochester: He owes Jane money. She could demand it and ask for a reference. If he refuses, she could always pull the "you want to lock two wives in the attic?" card. Risky option, because Rochester is volatile, he's already shown signs of violence, and Jane might cave if she faces him again. I don't blame her for not taking this option, but it was there.

Bessie and Robert: They like her, and they have a house separate from the main house. If she can find a way to travel there, they'd probably house her.

The priest: You know, the one who was going to marry them in the church that's literally walking distance from Thornfield's front door. He knows Jane's story, knows that she's innocent, and knows exactly why she needs help. In the perfect position to provide aid.

The Lowood school: She's been gone for less than a year. I'm sure they'd take her back.

[swisheywishyoverlord]

Perhaps I am a romantic fool, but I did enjoy Pride and Prejudice more than the other Austen novels we read this semester, probably because of the stronger romantic plot lines. While everyone does end up married in the end in Austen’s work, I feel that the pairings in this book make a lot of sense for all the characters involved. 

Starting with the most obvious, Elizabeth and Darcy are both characters that are extremely prideful and prejudiced, yet they level each other out. At the beginning of their relationship Darcy’s flippant, prideful commentary creates a bias for Lizzy disposing her away from him (Austen, 9). When Wickham enters her life, she quickly allows his manipulation to reinforce her negative opinion, boiling over when she rejects Darcy’s marriage proposal (Austen, 134). Darcy’s pride is usually very blatant. He has a cold exterior at almost all times and he does things like write letters to get the final word in so that Lizzy cannot wound him again (Austen, 141). However, these elements of his nature melt away when he is able to truly converse with Lizzy. During their walk in the garden, her expression of affection caused a visceral reaction in him: “heart-felt delight, diffused over his face, became him” (Austen, 250). This shift away from his usual prideful demeanor toward a contented, at ease persona shows the balancing act for both of them. Darcy in turn checks Lizzy’s prejudices and pride. It was after reading the letter that she exclaims, “‘I have courted prepossession and ignorance’” (Austen, 144). Their relationship is mutually beneficial because it helps them be more aware of themselves. It is exactly as Mr. Bennet expressed when he said Lizzy would not survive in an “unequal marriage,” she needs a relationship of equals which she gets in Darcy, flaws and all (Austen, 258). Their relationship is brilliant.

Jane and Bingley are the gold standard. They are both doofuses in love. The only reason they were not together sooner is because of the interference from other characters like Mr. Darcy and Ms. Bingley. Other than their rather pure relationship, Jane and Bingley share other similarities. Jane is the eldest daughter and responsibility falls to her to secure a good marriage that is advantageous enough to aid in marrying off her sisters. A similar sense of responsibility weighs on Bingley as one of the young men of large fortune who has to attain a good wife and have an heir. They are a sweet couple and I like their simplicity in contrast to the darker love between Lizzy and Darcy.

This meme was created by me and I am very happy with it. Of course, as I explained above, I love the two obvious romantic pairs in this novel, but I am especially appreciative of Mary remaining alone. Yes, it is tragic for her, but her character could not have been in a happy romantic relationship from my perspective. It is not because of her lack of beauty compared to her sisters or anything. She is too selfish. At one of the first balls we see Mary “eagerly succeeded” her sister and she was described as someone who “worked hard for knowledge and accomplishments,... impatient for display” (Austen, 18). As the only plain one of her sisters Mary was definitely dealt a harder hand, but she goes through the world demanding attention and for skills she does not have to compensate, hurting everyone else in the process. Her lackluster playing was an embarrassment to her entire family and yet she persisted. I think she needs to take a good long look at herself and spend some time alone. Her apparent plainness is not a complete detriment. Plain women get married all the time. However, she holds herself back. That is why Gru is just as eager with Mary’s lack of marriage as he is for the previous two. Mary being alone is the right thing for her right now.

I’m going to keep Lydia and Wickham short. They are both manipulative and immature in their own ways which leads to their forced marriage. Yes, it ended up being more than Wickham should have hoped for with Darcy’s interference, but they are clearly still poor as Lydia asks Lizzy for aid at the end of the novel (Austen, 264). Gru looks so down in the meme because their pairing is a result of their negative traits condemning each other to their fates. It is sad. Lydia is impulsive and immature and Wickham is impulsive and greedy. They are well matched like the other couples, but their bad traits build up together instead of evening out like Darcy and Lizzy.

Sorry this is long winded, but as the Gru meme suggests I can talk about this for a while. I am Gru and this is a short synopsis of what he ranting about in his presentation. Thank you :)

[plus-size-reader]

Drive In

Billy Hargrove x Plus size!reader

Word Count: 1021 words

Warnings: none 

Summary: Asking Billy out, beating him to it before he can ask you

——————————————————————————————————

You had always loved going to the drive in.

It was a sort of tradition that you’d started with your family as a kid. There wasn't a lot to do in a small town like Hawkins, with the exception of walking around the local grocery store and getting into trouble.

Still, you always found joy in those Friday night movies.

At 8:30, every Friday night, the local drive-in played some horror blockbuster, and whether it was new or old, you couldn’t get enough. You learned later that they played other things throughout the week but you didn’t care about that.

For you, it was all about the thrill that you got from horror.

You had always loved it, then and now.

Your family traditions had changed a lot as your family grew and adapted. Your brother went off to college, and your mother and father’s jobs got more demanding. No one had time to drop what they were doing to see a movie with you.

Until you met Billy.

Billy Hargrove moved from California to Hawkins over the summer and you thought he was just groovy. He wore the same jean jacket every single day and drove a badass blue Camaro that you couldn’t get enough of.

All things considered he was the coolest guy you could have ever met but more than anything, he was going to be the perfect movie watching partner.

He just didn't know it yet.

After all, the two of you had never spoken to one another before but you knew that the best icebreaker in the world was going to be asking him to a movie. You weren't entirely sure that it would work, but it was the best shot you had.

You didn't know it yet, of course, but Billy had noticed you too. It was almost impossible, with your striped sweaters and Mary Janes clicking on the pavement as you walked past his car every morning. It would have been impossible to miss you.

In that way, you two were the same.

You were both an enigma in a place like Hawkins. You didn’t really fit into one social circle or group of friends in the high school scene, that drew attention wherever you went. Everyone knew that it was only a matter of time before you two got together, like two smaller hurricanes joining over the sea to create an even larger storm.

Had they known what you were planning, they wouldn't have been able to blame you for trying to speed up the process. You had never been one to just stand by and let the things you want pass you by.

If you wanted something, you were going to get it.

...And right now, you wanted Billy.

~

“Good morning Billy” you purred, sitting your books down on the desk beside his, thankful that homeroom didn't start for another few minutes. It gave you just enough time to make your proposal without having to worry about interrupting anything.

Normally, you would sit in the front of the class, as to not miss anything. Billy knew that and was shocked at your choice, but didn’t complain. What man in his right mind would argue with a beautiful woman, trying to talk to him?

Certainly not him.

"Good morning sweetheart, how can I help you?" he grinned, propping his head up on his elbow, looking at you with a cocky, yet somehow dreamy look on his face. If nothing else, he was handsome.

At least he had that going for him.

"I had a brief proposal for you, if you'll indulge me" you started, putting on your best dramatic flare in a way that you were sure he'd appreciate. You didn't know him really well but anyone who spent that much time on their hair in the morning, appreciated some amount of drama.

You knew that for sure.

All Billy did was nod, smiling as he looked at you, still waiting for some kind of development. Frankly, you could have suggested anything right now and he would have agreed to it. However, when you took a strip of paper from your bag, and started scribbling on it, he had more than a few questions.

"What are you doing? Can't you just tell me what you have going on?" he wondered, a chuckle on his lips as you fiddled with your pen, focusing on what you were doing. You'd decided to make this more of a game.

It was more fun for you this way.

"This Friday at 8:00, you can pick me up at this address and we can go see a movie, if you'd like that is?" you suggested pretty proud of yourself for pulling this off as smoothly as you could. You had always been confident, but this was a knew high for even you.

Something about Billy just brought this out in you.

Billy looked at you for a second, taking the slip of paper you were holding out to him and surveying it for a moment between his fingers. It didn't make a whole lot of sense to him, that you would do all of this instead of just asking him out directly.

Even still, he nodded.

"Sounds like a plan, I'll see you on Friday" he nodded, tucking the paper into his pocket without a second thought, but before anything else, class was about to start. It was far from the end of your conversation, but it was going to have to take a pause.

He may not have been prepared for this to be the way today went, but it was a pleasant surprise.

Now, all he had to do was wait for Friday to roll around and he'd finally get to spend some time with you. He'd been thinking about this for so long, plotting the best way to ask you out, but you beat him to it.

...But he was going to get the last laugh.

You may have set up the date, as far as location and plans, but Billy was going to make it the best date you'd ever had, if it was the last thing he did.

[chopper-witch]

I know there is a lot of talk about modern!stranger things rn and it's got cute things with the characters or how’d they would text/sext whatever but... 

Y’all. 

Actual Stranger Things plot in modern times. in 2022 (well, 2019-2022, ig) 

Seriously think about it. 

I just rewatched s2, and Jonathan and Nancy get away with leaving because Nancy pretends to be at a friend's house for a few days by calling from a landline in ILLINOIS. Yeah, sure *67. But *67 in 2022? Ahahaha, Nance, your mom is pulling out “find my iPhone” and hunting your ass DOWN. She can’t find you? Oh, she’s calling the company and asking where the fuck that call just came from. And already texting your friends if they really are with you, and then you have to beg them to take one of those “pretend I took the photo” photos. 

Aliens instead of devil worship. Which still works great because it is clearly a very Christian town 🤧. Gotta get that antisemitism in there. 

The kids are kids still, you know? TikTok is popular. IG Reels are popular. Is it really their fault the NYT does an exposé on the Hawkins Lab because one of them (Dustin) posted a video of Dart when he was small on their alt and added in the tags #hawkins #hawkinslab #realmonsters #monsterarereal? 

#talkshitgethit goes trending after the Angela incident with everyone on Jane’s side after someone else who was at the rink posted a video about everything that happened from beginning to end. The news even gets ahold of it, and the girl went missing in police custody...

They need Suzie to trace something because of course the lab is using VPN shit and heavy firewalls and GPS spoofs and they know how to trace an IP but please, is there some way to trace someone who is using a VPN and spoofs from our phones please help we promise its for a video game and instead of hesitantly believing she goes, “it’s okay if you want to break into the government. I’ve been wanting to try that for a while”

My original idea with them demanding everyone makes a Spotify playlist and share it but then discovering Vecna nerfs lithium-ion batters, so they need to burn CDs and use a player that isn’t rechargeable, but who even has the ability to burn CDs anymore? The library has four 3-d printers... and one ancient computer that is barely booting but still has a CD slot attached. 

The government is trying to clean this up so bad, every single time, but you know, Marvel just came out with their whatever-th movie, Star Wars is still milking itself dry, HBO is still doing Game of Thrones something or another, and both sci-fi and fantasy are still growing in popularity. Alternate dimensions real? Good luck putting that one back in the box. Psionic powers real? Yeah, that’s not going away. 

Especially since in our very real world the CIA was very really trying to do projects very, very similar to what is seen in Stranger Things (and this isn’t a conspiracy - this is a proven fact. MK Ultra had over 100 projects, and much of it was tied to mind control. They also tried to a “projected consciousness” kind of thing literally called “Gateway Process”, the document is here).

God, I could keep going. Something about the idea is so fucking funny to me. Like almost none of this works in the modern world. Or it does, but not as well. 

[dailytudors]

The Beginning of Thomas Cromwell's Downfall

On June 10th, 1540, Thomas Cromwell was arrested on flimsy charges of treason and heresy. “Thomas Cromwell’s arrest” writes Hutchinson, “was as ruthless as it was sudden.”

Thomas Cromwell had traveled to Westminster Palace to take his place on the Privy Council. After the council, when everyone went to dinner, his mortal enemy, the Duke of Norfolk, Thomas Howard, stood up and raised his voice and shouted “Cromwell! Do not sit there! That is no place for you! Traitors do not sit amongst gentlemen.”

When Thomas demanded to know what the hell was going on, the captain of the Guards, Anthony Wingfield and six more men came forward. Thomas Cromwell, as they predicted, did not go easily. He asked them what was the reason for his arrest, but the Captain of the Guards calmly told him that wasn’t his concern. He either went with them willingly and they wouldn’t hurt him, or else he resisted and they would use full force against him. Cromwell probably knew this day was coming. According to his latest biographer, Tracy Borman; Thomas Cromwell was plotting against the Duke of Norfolk just as he was plotting against Cromwell. It was only a matter of who got there first.

Henry VIII could have easily stopped this from happening but Henry was the main force here. Norfolk loaded the gun, and Henry pulled the trigger. He was very dissatisfied with his fourth bride, Anne of Cleves. And although he had known of her pre-contract with the Duke of Lorraine, he agreed to marry her anyway because he needed the Cleves alliance so badly. Once he saw her, he tried to get out of this arrangement saying that she was ugly and that she wasn’t a virgin. But the truth is that Henry didn’t like her because of their first meeting. That first meeting on January of that year really determined their short marriage. Whereas Henry’s previous wives (including his first foreign wife, Katherine of Aragon) were very conscious of their roles as Queens and familiar with the pageantry and the culture of courtly love; Anne was educated in a very strict household. She had no idea what she was getting herself into. Or rather, her brother had no idea what she was going to getting his sister into. Anne was a fish out of water in the English court. Her garb was strange, she could barely speak English and she had no idea how to dance or engage in the types of conversation that other women of her adoptive country engaged on.

She was completely unprepared for this. And then came Henry VIII. He was no longer the handsome youth who had bedazzled so many women. He had grown morbidly obese and his ulcerous leg smelled bad. But being who he was, he still had a penchant for court drama so he thought of surprising his wife by arranging a playful visit to her. He and a few other courtiers dressed as bandits and arrived to Anne’s bedroom and started flirting with her ladies, including those she brought from Cleves.

You can imagine Anne’s horror as this happened. The leader of the bandits approached Anne and tried to speak with her and when he went too far –from Anne’s point of view- Anne pushed him away and told him to go away. For a man like Henry VIII with an ego the size of his realm, being told that he was disgusting and refused by in front of everyone, including his best friends, it was a huge humiliation. When he revealed who he was, Anne immediately apologized but it was too late. Her reaction made Henry make up his mind about her.

Cromwell tried many times to convince Anne to seduce Henry, to get on his good side but it wasn’t Anne who was at fault here, it was Henry. And it was Anne’s education. She hadn’t been told what she would be getting into, she hadn’t been prepared for this role the way her predecessors had been. Even her common predecessors. Anne Boleyn had served under three Queens, Jane under two. They knew state protocol, they knew all about courtly love. And Katherine of Aragon like Anne of Cleves had been a foreigner but one who had grown in a court that treasured courtly love and were dressing good was everything. She was skilled in dance, music, art, everything. Anne had practical skills which were seen as very useful, but ultimately they paled in comparison to her other predecessors.

Henry VIII directed his anger at Cromwell. Cromwell tried to tell him that he couldn’t get out of this arrangement so easily. He had agreed to marry Anne of Cleves, and there was nothing else he could say that would justify his repudiation of her. So Henry married her. But he was very angry at Cromwell. And Cromwell was taking too many liberties with his privileges position. Though Boarman believes that Anne was as ugly as Henry saw her, she does admit that it may have all been a matter of perception. And that one of the people who added more fuel to the fire of disappointment is Cromwell. Cromwell probably knew Anne was no great beauty, but by no means was she ugly. She could enchant the King. But Cromwell as always wanted to make sure that Henry would fall in love with her before he got to lay eyes on her so he started bragging about her beauty, saying that her hair shined like the sun, that her eyes were like stars, that her skin was so fair, etc. Then there was also the religious factor. Thomas Cromwell was a very methodical and pragmatic man; he did what the King asked him to. But he was also a Reformist sympathizer and his sympathies were becoming more obvious to the King and his enemies.

After Cromwell was apprehended by the royal guards, he lost it. He said very angrily “This then is the reward for all my services?” Then he turned to the members of the Privy Council “On your consciences, I ask you, am I a traitor?”

If Cromwell believed he was going to cause a big impression and leave everyone dumbfounded, he was sorely disappointed because soon after he asked this, everyone began yelling “Yes” and “Traitor”.

Read the rest here: https://tudorsandotherhistories.wordpress.com/2015/06/10/thomas-cromwells-fall-from-grace/

[thecandywrites]

Blood For Gold Chapter 21

Oh but we aren’t done, let’s unravel this spiderweb completely shall we? All the aces that everyone thought they had are pulled out, and what they thought were aces, just might end up being jokers instead. Also this picture of this dagger? That’s Kushi, before and after it turned to platinum, before it disintergrated into black ash. 

@punkhorse96​ this is where we come right to the brink of losing everything and this story ALMOST becomes a tragedy only for LOVE TO CONQUER ALL. And save the day and bring it back from the brink of destruction and taking the highroad keeps you from being involved in the tragic “accidents” on the low roads from the head on collisions between the other players in the game. Enjoy Darling, one more chapter to tie all this up in a neat little bow. 

Also I would like to make a note- because this mentions pregnancy and in a sense, abortion too- I want to make something clear. I am pro choice. I believe that children can be a blessing, but they above all else, are people and they deserve to be wanted, deserve to be cared for by loving and caring parents who want them and parents who are ready and willing to have them. And not be viewed as the bad consequence for having sex. 

Blood For Gold

Chapter 21

“What’s going on now?” Demsey asked you. 

“Something between Benny and Sierge that they need to work out.” You answered him. 

“Demsey, do remember that favor I asked of you? How you would help me escape the Palace of Windsor?” You prompted, as your tears welled in your eyes because having Demsey so close but knowing that the best thing to do for him was going to be to get worlds apart from him was breaking your heart just thinking about. 

“Yes, I have not forgotten.” Demsey reassured you. 

“I need to call it in. The moment we return, I need you to bring that trunk down to the stables, I was given Charlico as a gift, and I’m leaving with Heavencrest and Charlico. Because the moment we get back and can get packed, everyone is leaving the Palace of Windsor and my family is going to be going to Mirador to help sort things out.” You informed him. 

“Absolutely, I will ride back immediately and meet you in the stables.” Demsey reassured you. 

“Thank you.” You thanked him before your parents came and pulled you back to them as they insisted on having a family meeting to discuss what they were going to do as once again, urged them all to go to Mirador and formulate a plan there and that you would have room in Mirador’s stables for everyone’s rides and plenty of rooms for them to stay in even though they weren’t as lavish as the rooms at the Palace of Windsor but your family insisted that even if they had to share beds and roll out bed rolls on the floor, they were going to stay together but in this moment, you just wanted to be free and have space from everyone. 

Demsey rode the fastest horse he could rent and immediately went up to his room and hastily packed his own things into his own trunk and put them with yours and waited anxiously in the stables as your family came back as you hurriedly packed everything you could not live without and put them in a separate trunk and instructed the servants to take the first trunk to the stables and all the others to go back to Mirador with your parents since they would be taking carriages back to Mirador before you got dressed in a simple, comfortable shirt and pants along with your flying leathers and practically ran towards the stables once Yalin gave you Charlico’s papers of ownership and breeding lines and a note to the stable hands that Charlico’s saddle and whatever other tack you wanted would be leaving with him. 

“So what happened in there?” Demsey asked as he tried to help you get Charlico and Heavencrest saddled up to be loaded up. 

“My case against the Morrigans got dismissed from every court in England.” You told him. 

“How in the world did the Morrigans get your case dismissed?!” Demsey demanded. 

“Because it wasn’t them that did it, it was the Dowager Queen who was the one who dismissed both my case against the Morrigans and the Morrigan’s case against me in both the public and private courts and barred us from ever going to court to protect the Crown from any damage that this case would bring to it through Gregori, Yalin and Ramsey and she herself got to see and hear all of the evidence and acted as judge and jury and ruled in my favor. The original contract I had with Edward Senior was upheld. And the Dowager Queen awarded me everything that the Morrigans have as recompense for the hurt they caused me in their conspiracy and attempt to murder me and they were branded as mad and insane for trying to murder me via mourakatili and were sent to the asylum to be fed poison to make them honestly insane.” You answered. 

“Oh, but that’s a good thing, isn’t it? Isn’t that more or less the outcome you wanted?” Demsey asked in confusion because you were still manically trying to saddle and load both animals up and you were still crying and clearly in distress. 

“Factually, yes, but at the same time, no, not at all, because I finally found out why they tried to kill me to begin with and it’s so much worse than anything I could have imagined. The day I married Edward Senior, Ramsey, in a panic said only minutes after I married Edward, told his father that I was his perfect bride but because I was just then married, I was unavailable because his parents had threatened him that if he had not found a bride that season, he would be cut off in every conceivable way and sent into the army and have the rake beaten out of him one way or another. But he just thought I would marry Edward and live out the rest of his natural life with him and in five to ten years when Edward would die naturally of old age, then he would be ready by then. But what no one realized was Gregori’s desperation to see Ramsey married and father to a legitimate heir as soon as possible was so great, he conspired to murder Edward Senior so that I could be Ramsey’s wife that much quicker. Because it was Gregori who bribed Edward’s doctor- Dr. Rickets, to poison Edward Senior with Wolf’s Eye which when you take it, it makes you delirious within a couple months, and within a few more months, it will put into a further delirious rage to the point your heart beats so hard so fast, your heart beats itself apart, causing your heart to fail, and that led to Edward’s own madness and in his madness, he abused me. The entire Royal Family including Charlotte, Yalin, Ramsey and myself were completely unaware of Gregori’s involvement and plotting and all of them were mortified to learn of this news and as recompense, they gave me Charlico for free, although I still feel I paid for him with my own blood, but none of that seems to matter to anyone else so the real murderer is walking free because he’s the King’s brother and heaven forbid he face any punishment for his actions.” You hissed as you wiped your angry tears away as you did your best to get Heavencrest’s saddle cinched correctly as your tears blurred your vision. 

“The Morrigan's thought I had poisoned Edward Senior, wanting to get out of the marriage which of course wasn’t true because before the poisoning- Edward Senior had been nothing but good to me and I was happy and content with him and I had no reason or motive or cause for such a thing but they thought I was a typical moura, who just wanted the highest payout as quickly as possible and in retaliation and wanting to avenge Edward Senior, hired the same doctor, Dr. Rickets, to obtain mourkatili and poison me with it so that I would be buried right next to Edward Senior. Dr. Rickets tried telling Gregori but Gregori was already on holiday with his family in Dorierra trying to find another “me” for Ramsey and didn’t get his letter in time for Gregori to step in and Dr. Rickets added Jade’s Crown to the mourkatili to make it less lethal but more addictive and told the Morrigans all they needed to do was put a thimble full of it into a pot of hibiscus tea to hide the color and once I would have a sip, I would become addicted and would request to drink it more and would choose to drink myself to death, which that plot very narrowly succeeded.” You revealed with a bitter laugh. 

“But because it was Gregori who is guilty of the conspiracy, it’s being covered up, buried and dismissed and all evidence of Gregori’s guilt, once it was made aware by the Morrigans and myself and my family, it was then quickly destroyed and Dr. Rickets ended up going to the asylum with the Morrigans and has the same fate as them.” You revealed as Demsey was half tempted to try to burn the palace down himself as rage almost blinded him but your hurt kept his mind with you in the moment.  

“However, the complication was that Richard’s mistress, Myra, her children by Richard were brought up in Broadcove as servants because Agnes insisted that only the children she bore to Richard should be his heirs and treated them as such because she was the one who had control of a good portion of the wealth since a lot of it was in her name, that term was agreed on so that Agnes would continue go along with everything like a good wife and Richard of course had to agree because Myra has no nobility at all herself, just her beauty and personality to recommend her and Agnes had the breeding, nobility, connections and dowry to boot. So, of course Richard married Agnes but kept Myra as his mistress and it is those connections and that dowry that enabled Edward Senior and Richard to invest it and multiply it and turn it into the massive wealth they did and with Agnes working her own contacts like a concierto does an orchestra, that’s why they have as much power and influence as they do. But Agnes was always resentful on account of Myra so she abused those poor innocent children because she hated how Richard loved them more than the children she bore to him and even though they were his bastards, they were made in more love than Jane and little Edward ever were and she demanded that if they remain in the house that they were to earn their place as servants or be put out into the street because she could not bear the humiliation of Edward’s infidelity made public and she would turn all of her connections on Richard if she didn’t get her way so he had no choice but to agree and Myra was lucky she got a room, much less a suite of rooms at Broadcove in the opposite end of the house from Agnes, Jane and little Edward.” You explained. 

“And if that wasn’t bad enough Agnes even sent one of them to their early death, the eldest son Myra bore to Richard, the second time I was served mourkatili in tea form, she insisted that to “prove” it wasn’t dangerous, for the poor boy who served it to me, she insisted that he taste it to prove it wasn’t poisonous, I tried to stop it but he did as she commanded and dropped dead the moment that poison touched his lips and she tried to pin it on me to Myra saying that I insisted he drink it. So of course Myra came to me and demanded to know what the poor boy had done to me that I should be so cruel as to kill him and when Richard found out, of course he believed Agnes at first and came at me and had me tied down so he could beat me and I couldn’t fight back, I was too drunk on mourkatili to fight back anyway before Jane intervened and told them the truth and Jane had to show them the truth that had been caught via her own messengerari that was in the room and when Myra saw it, she apologized profusely and did everything she could to heal the hurt that Richard had inflicted but when Richard saw it, he never did apologize to me but instead turned on Agnes, her bruises and cuts were twice as bad as my own. But that didn’t stop Agnes because the third time Agnes did it, it was Myra’s youngest boy who was only six.” You broke down crying as Demsey came and tried to hold you but you resisted him, because you wanted to leave as soon as you got this all off your chest because you wanted and needed him to know the truth. 

The whole truth.  

“And I of course drank down every drop of it to keep him from having any to protect him and Jane, once again had to intervene, so she and her father decided that only she would serve me the mourkatili because I would not make her drink it and that all of Richard’s other children by Myra would be kept to her apartments in the north wing and would only be let out when they were in the company of Myra or Richard, so they became like caged animals, just like me and must like Myra.” You revealed as Demsey stared in horror. 

“And Jane, sweet Jane, she got her ladies maid to go to the market for her to get me ipecac and she would try to dilute the mourkatili and try to add what she had heard would help lessen the impact of it or help to try to neutralize it. And she purposefully “tripped” and crashed onto the floor when she couldn’t dilute the tea and it of course stained the rugs and the floorboards underneath but she couldn’t do it too often for fear her parents would get suspicious but she did everything she could in those limited, forced circumstances to try to do what she could to save me, so even though the fact of the matter is she did serve me poison, she isn’t responsible for it. And I hold no grudge against her or blame. And of course, when I got to leave Broadcove, Myra pleaded with me to take her children as my own servants because she knew I would be good to them and treat them with kindness, much more than they were being given at home and I could not refuse her. But of course, they are their father’s children and they of course, kept reporting on everything I did to their father. So even when I left Broadcove, I couldn’t escape the Morrigans.” You divulged. 

“But why not dismiss them entirely then?” Demsey asked. 

“Because they have been good to me despite that and I couldn’t fault them for their loyalty, nor can I find fault in their service, they have always been respectful and obedient and they did everything they could to be courteous and cater to me and it was only three months into my widowhood when they saw for themselves what kind of person I was that they switched their loyalties to me and told their father to “fuck off” because if he really did love them like he claimed, then he would not have put up with their indentured servitude or mistreatment at Agnes’ hands and refused to spy on me after that and it’s because of those circumstances that in an effort to mend things with me, the King made Myra a Maquise, a station higher than a Count or Countess and basically told everyone the cover for this whole fucking fiasco was ‘that Agnes and Richard went on holiday, got sick with something to make them go mad while Jane and I have been at Windsor and that they bribed Dr. Rickets to poison me with mourkatili and thankfully my brother’s dragon was here to cure me and that they are all guilty of madness and attempted murder and have since been sent to the asylum. And that Marquise Myra Bellafont, moved with pity, has taken in Jane and little Edward and is now their loving caregiver’.” You informed him. 

“So that’s why I am leaving Broadcove to Myra and all of her children as heirs of it because while Agnes has always treated them with animosity, they have never treated Jane or little Edward that way or even Myra, let alone me. So they will leave Mirador as my servants and enter Broadcove as masters and I have been awarded everything that the Morrigans had, all wealth and property and I am leaving a business or two to Myra and her children to run so that they can keep up Broadcove and care for their needs and anyone who says otherwise or attempts to reveal the truth will be promptly killed or sent to the asylum themselves.” You explained. 

“But if that wasn’t enough, Richard did hire a mage to cast a spell over all of Mirador so that no messengerari would work and send any message out and bribed four of the post masters in the Royal Mail Service to destroy every piece of mail going in or out to me and Mage Bellfast had to conjure them all up because they had all been burned in an effort to be destroyed. That’s why that table was covered in mail from my friends and family. Not even your letter to me a few days before the ball to warn me about who was going to be there and who meant me harm could reach me.” You explained. 

“And that was the other reason why the Royal Family couldn’t let this go to court because to prove that their Royal Mail Service had been corrupted, couldn’t be tolerated.” You answered. 

“And what’s even worse is now I can’t go home to Dorierra either because I got the classification of tavnit, which means “no master”. And even if I were to go back to Dorierra, I can’t stand to go back into the bride system. But I also can’t stand to go home to Mirador where my whole family now has dollar signs in their eyes and now they are all clamoring for a piece of the giant money pie I’ve just been handed and the temptation to just let your sister inherit all that I have so that you can assist her in how to run it all so I can be free of even all of that is too tempting for me right now and so the only place that leaves that I can go and be truly free in every sense, is a colony because justice is a joke and loyalty is fickle at best in this country and the less people around me who can use me for their own benefit, spy on me to others who would use that information as blackmail against me and betray me, the better.” You insisted bitterly.  

“Do you think I would ever do those things to you?” Demsey asked. 

“No, never, because you’re actually a very good man, with upstanding character and morals but you deserve a highborn lady at your side to be the perfect wife to you and help you and stand by you. And as much as I want to do that, I can’t.” You cried as you put your bags onto the saddles and tied them down. 

“Why not? I told you, I don’t need an heir and a spare, all I want is you to be happy. And if a colony is where you think you’ll find that then let me go with you. Where you go, I go. To hell with England.” Demsey insisted. 

“No, England is still your home though, and Whydah I’m sure has no equal. You have everything here, you have your business which should be booming with the new soap recipes which Leumeni has offered to share if he could have the chance to court Kiera properly. You have your title as Duke, you have your family and friends, and I’m not worth giving all of that up for.” You argued. 

“Yes you are! To me, you are worth more than anything this world has to offer me.” Demsey argued further as he once again tried to reach for you to pull you into the comfort of his embrace as you desperately put your hands on his chest and shoved him away with what was left of your strength in that moment. 

“Demsey please! You can’t love me without knowing the truth about me! I am a murderer! I’m the one who gave Edward his fatal blow!” You cried out as Demsey was dumbstruck by such a revelation as he subconsciously took a step back as your heart broke to see such a reaction from him before you grabbed your last bag and tied it to Charlico’s saddle.  

“A millenia ago, when mouras first touched down on the ground, the reason we knew we could turn things into gold was because at a banquet, a drunken man tried to rape a moura woman. The moment his touches grew desperate and violent, just touching her, her body, in an act of self defense, turned him into a statue of gold. That’s how we found out we had that power. Once she touched him again, he turned back to flesh and blood but the act of being a solid gold statue killed him and he dropped dead. Then we learned to master that defense mechanism and learned to control it. It was our blessing and our curse. From there, moura women were hunted like game, like trophies and when mouras grew cloaks, when you took a moura’s cloak you were considered bonded with them. And men of all kinds hunted us, and once we turned their enemies into statues of gold, to be melted down into bricks and bars of it and once that is done once it stays gold for a year, touching it again will never let it revert back to it’s original flesh, so the gold was kept in the ground for a year and a half just to be safe while the person was considered “gone missing”, or the women turned their own body weight of mud and rock and bricks into gold, then they were released. But that meant that no moura would ever have rape or any abuse attempted on them because the perpratrator would be turned to gold themselves. But when the gold plague came, that power died with it. And suddenly we didn’t have that protection, or that curse. Until only recently, and I mean recently as in only the last one hundred years. There have been only four mouras born in the whole world, who can now touch that moura gold and turn it into moura platinum. That’s what I am. I’m a platinum moura. The moment Edward’s flesh touched mine as he tried to rape me, he dropped dead as a platinum statue, he broke the bed and the crash was heard through the whole house and I had to have the bed burned and bribed Dr. Rickets to say he died of a heart attack, which having a heart that needs to be beating for you to stay alive, if it stops, you’re dead, still kind of happened. But because of the mourkatili, it means that that very platinum is poisonous and lethal if you touch it but when I touch it again, it turns to black ash, the same black ash from the Gold Plague that killed billions of heavenly moura, that’s why my hands were black when you came in and why there was so much ash on the floor because Mage Bellfast, as payment for conjuring up my mail asked me to turn a brick of moura gold into moura platinum. I tried and failed because Grevu cured me. And when Mage Altissia informed Mage Bellfast of that, he cast a spell on me and pulled the mourkatili that was in my hair back into my body and re-poisoned me so that I could have that power back. I tried stabbing him after he put that spell on me and I tried stabbing him with Kushi and Kushi turned from gold to platinum in my hands but the mourkatili made me weak again and I collapsed onto the floor and when I stood back up and picked up that gold bar and the moment I touched it, it turned from gold to platinum and I gave it to him and he at the time had the good sense of wearing gloves and when he got to hold it, he kissed it. And when he kissed it, his body instantly dissolved into a heap of ash with the bar of platinum falling onto a heap of his clothes and ash and it killed him and when I went to pick up Kushi, the moment I touched it, it turned back to gold but also into ash as well and it disintegrated into my hands and all the jewels that were imbedded into it, fell through my fingers like pebbled sand at the beach. I destroyed Kushi because it had been made with moura gold and when I touched that brick of moura platinum, it did the same thing. And now I can’t touch anything made out of moura gold or else the same thing will happen to it and for all I know the ash is just as poisonous now as it was when it first appeared in the Gold Plague. That’s why I have the tavnit status and that’s why I’m not welcome back in Dorierra because I have no use for the stable masters and once again, I am a lost cause.” You confessed. 

“Do you still love me now? Knowing that I can kill you if you touch me? That I can turn everything that happens to be moura gold and turn it into poisonous platinum that will kill everything and anything it touches?” You asked rhetorically. 

“That’s why as soon as I’m packed, I am going to go back down to Grevu so he can heal me yet again so that I am free of this curse too and then I’m leaving for the farthest colony I can find from here because the more space between me and this whole horrible situation and circumstances, the better.” You told him. 

“But I know you would never do such things to me, at least on purpose. I promise to remove everything gold from Whydah so that you can’t possibly…” Demsey tried to offer. 

“Demsey, that is not the only reason I can’t marry you and that you can not come with me. You deserve a wife who is faithful and honest with you in all things. Demsey I am pregnant. I am with child as we speak. I’m a month along already and even if we got married today, the baby will come too soon after the wedding and your reputation as well as my own would probably be ruined beyond repair and I can’t do that to you, I won’t do that to you, I refuse to do that to you. It’s not right and I refuse to do anything that can be in any way harmful to you. That’s why Grevu cured me the first time, he could tell I was falling pregnant and cured me to protect me and the baby, but because of the pregnancy and because of Grevu’s magic, protecting the baby from all harm, even now with the mourkatili in me, the baby is fine, it remains unharmed and the rest of my womb is being protected from reabsorbing it’s poison and this babe was made in love and passion and I refuse to harm it either. It’s an innocent in this situation too and it’s not only my responsibility and obligation to take on the consequences of my own actions and I have no one to blame for my state but myself and I am ready and willing to take it on and the only saving grace I have is that the baby is in no way the offspring of the Morrigans. And I love you too much to try to push onto you a baby that isn’t yours. It wouldn’t be honest or right. And I can’t ask you to take me and this baby on, knowing that.” You insisted as you finished then went over everything to make sure everything was attached and secure and wouldn’t come flying off when you would fly to the colonies in just a few moments. 

“And the father of the baby has completely disappeared, no one can find him. And what’s worse is he was a whore in a whorehouse, that’s who the father of this baby is. Two months ago, when you gave me that note back that Calla was able to sneak to me. I went to The Gold Finch, that is where I met Yalin, she told me about The Red Velvet Rope and she told me which days to go and which days to avoid the place because that was Ramsey’s favorite whorehouse and at the time she didn’t want us to meet because she knew Rasmey would use me, then ruin me. I met the manwhore there and I got to be with him three times, that first time, a second time right before the ball at Havenfield and the third at the Masquerade Ball at The Midnight Peacock. That’s who I was with right before you found me at the bar, he was why I didn’t feel like dancing because we had both told the other that we were going to be pursuing other people and that never again would The Red Velvet Rope be in our lives and then the bastard made an enormous bet on me on Kamoba and apparently won a small fortune and as always, he took the money and ran because since then, he has vanished into thin air and no one has even heard of him, let alone knows of him and of course The Red Velvet Rope absolutely insists that no one by his name or appearance has ever worked for them, ever. But the place wouldn’t be a good whorehouse if it didn’t serve it’s lady clientele pregnancy warding tea to counteract the consequences of it’s use which I made sure to drink both before and after each trip to The Red Velvet Rope. Except for the night of the Masquerade Ball, I was too heartbroken over losing him that I forgot to drink any and that one time was all it took, even with the mourkatili in my system which mourkatili is supposed to kill fetus’ but thanks to Grevu’s magic, the baby is perfectly fine and healthy and shows no signs of being disformed or anything. And I would never do you the dishonor of trying to pass off a baby that isn’t yours to your very face and I would hate myself for trying to live that lie and that guilt would eat me alive, more than mourkatili ever could. That’s what I meant by you deserve better. Do you still love me now? Don't these truths kill every ounce of love you thought you had for me? Don’t..don’t answer those questions. Hopefully all these truths will help you dismantle any affection you’ve built for me and hopefully you can find someone worthy of your love and affection who will do right by you, who isn’t a whoring murderer.” You offered as you finished with the last of it before you went back to Grevu and asked him to heal you again as Demsey sat on the now empty trunk as his own sack of clothes and personal items laid down at his feet and processed everything as he watched you get into Grevu’s tent with him as you hugged Grevu tight and tried to tell him goodbye as he wrapped his neck and wing around you protectively as you cried into his chest but thanked him for intervening and trying to protect you and save you and the baby before he seemed to glare at Demsey. 

“It’s not his fault. He’s not the one to cause my hurt.” You tried to excuse to Grevu. 

“Just, please, heal me, one last time, so I can carry the baby safely ok? Thank you, thank you for preserving this little miracle of life.” You pleaded with Grevu who put his nose into the neck of your flying leathers and snorted softly before you had to let him go and go to a corner and throw up again and just the sound of you being sick and in agony as once again, the mourkatili colored your hair, but just the ends of your hair this time instead of all of your hair as you readily grabbed it and cut the colored ends off and laid them on the ground for Grevu to burst into flames to destroy for good and it was enough to break Demsey out of his stupor and move him to action as he knelt next to you and once you were done, he handed you his handkerchief to wipe off your mouth. 

“Audra, my love for you transcends everything you’ve told me and will transcend a million things more. I don’t care if you were working at The Red Velvet Rope as a whore yourself, and I don’t care if you couldn’t know who or what was the father of the child you’re carrying and I don’t care if you don’t even have a penny to your name. I love you. I will always love you. And I will happily love the child you’re carrying as if it were my own. You speak like you’re the only one to have ever sinned. I’m imperfect too and I don’t want the perfect wife. How boring would that be? I want you as my partner in life, no matter how or what kind of name you want to attach to it, I want you, any part of you or all of you if you’re willing to give it to me as perfectly imperfect as you are right now and forever.” Demsey professed. 

“You want to hear my deepest darkest secret? Shortly after seeing you on the train, I used The Red Velvet Rope too because I could not get you off of my mind and I thought at the time that if I rutted with a moura, that would help me be less distracted and then I met another moura, with the same first name and the same looks as you. And my fantasy was that I was actually being intimate with you instead of her and I met with her three times as well, that first time shortly after returning the note to you from Calla, the second, right before the ball at Havenfield and then again at the Masquerade Ball. I went to that ball and I immediately rented a change of clothes so that no one would recognize me in my own clothes in an attempt that you would not recognize me but that she might and sure enough, like moth to a flame, she found me again and it both broke my heart but filled me with relief that she was going on the straight and narrow and she confessed that she was going after an orc in the gentry and I feared it was my brother because shortly after just giving Sierge the smallest, most miniscule of details about her, he has been looking for her ever since and he claimed he found her and agreed that her resemblance to you was uncanny and I tried to kiss her goodbye and cut things off clean with her at the ball, but it was like she was a drug that I was addicted to and I went one last round with her and I haven’t seen her since. She also bet on me for the Kamoba and apparently won a small fortune in turn but again, she, just took the money and ran and not even Sierge has been able to find her since, even with his almost super powerful sense of smell, and that was also why I was in no mood to dance at the Masquerade Ball and why after that, I found you at the bar and why it wasn’t fair to you at all that I was in your presence but yet it was her that was on my mind. So I’m just as much of a whore as her and I have been just as unfaithful and just as secretive and deceitful and I’m sorry that we live in a society where such things are like a death sentence to a woman and her honor but are expected from most men and it’s not fair and it isn’t right. But I swear- on my life, I would never, ever, hold such things against you and I would keep these revelations just between us and take them to my grave and I will do anything you ask of me, except for leaving your side. I want to help you, I want to love you and care for you if only you would let me. You are not the only one with sin or fault, I’m just as guilty as you, I’m just as imperfect and flawed. But she is nothing compared to you and is a sad counterfeit of the real you and I would much rather have you than a hundred of hers. You will always be infinitely more precious to me. Please, if you must insist on going to a colony, then let me go too. You don’t even have to marry me if you don’t want to, I don’t have to be a Duke, Sierge or even Tzane can take the title and the business for all I care. Just...let me love you and care for you the best way I can. I know how to make soap anywhere, with my own two hands, it doesn’t have to be England or Europa, I don’t care where we are or where we go, as long as we are together. That’s all that matters to me, we’ll find a way to keep each other. I swear.” Demsey offered before you took your small canteen on your hip and swished your mouth out real quick before you finally kissed him, climbing into his lap and wrapped yourself around him and held him tight as you both cried tears of happiness and relief as an overwhelming flood of emotion overtook you both. 

Then as if you both seemed to realize it at the same time, that each other’s taste was...really familiar.Not in a way that it was familiar from the night before but much farther back than that. Almost too familiar in an uncanny way. 

“Wait, this, other Audra, the first time you met her, did you try to call her Audrey and she corrected you by saying it’s Audra- Draft?” You questioned him as suddenly, something clicked in your head.  

“And I replied, ‘call me Demsey’.” Demsey answered as he gave you the most bizarre look before you both started laughing. 

“Oh my gods, we are so stupid! Ugh! The Abbess at the Red Velvet Rope, told me I was going to be seeing a guy named Draft. That’s why I said “Draft”, not as my last name, but that was to address you, who I thought was named Draft.” You confessed. 

“And it was on the 12th. At like, 3 o’clock in the afternoon? I told my abbess on my side of the place that I just wanted a rut with a moura and she offered an Audrey and so that’s why I called you Audrey and I thought the Draft thing was you saying your name was Audra Draft, Miss Draft.” Demsey confessed with a sigh of relief as he held you as finally your own personal scent was so wonderful and comforting and familiar! How had he not made the connection before now?

“And then we both returned on the 23rd at about the same time and met again, you were wearing that gorgeous navy suit jacket with the cream pants and that vest with cream and navy paisley.” You realized. 

“And you wore that sexy as sin black lace dress that had me nearly losing my load just from the looks of it. Which, you do still have that right?” Demsey asked.  

“Yeah, it’s back at Mirador.” You confirmed with another laugh. 

“And that was you? At the Masquerade Ball, and it was me that you were quitting Mr. Draft for?” Demsey asked as he just couldn’t stop laughing as all of a sudden everything clicked into place as to why he was so outrageously attracted to you as he tightened his hold on you. 

“Yeah, and obviously it was me that you were quitting Miss Draft for?” You asked with a laugh of  your own. 

“Yeah.” Demsey confirmed. 

“So this is actually my child you’re carrying, this is my babe that Grevu has used his magic in protecting this whole time?” Demsey asked in awed astonishment and wonder and gratuity that even when you thought it was the child of a manwhore, you would would bear it and cause no harm to it and you’d be juast as loving and doting and safeguarding it which pleased him greatly and really proved to him the exceptional character you had as you nodded yes before he happily grabbed your face and kissed you with so much passion and so much feeling it was almost overpowering.

“Ok, new change of plans, I am marrying you as soon as I possibly can, I have a ring for you actually here, in my pocket, when you had that attendant hand the journal that I had written in back to me and that one line that you loved me back was all I needed to know, I figured you would be a while and I immediately rode to the closest jewelry store and bought you a ring and raced back and I barely made it back before we came inside the throne room. I am taking you home to Whydah and only keep whatever servants you’re really attached to back at Mirador but otherwise, leave the rest to whoever you want and I will never leave your side again and I pledge my heart, mind, soul and absolute fidelity to you from this day on.” Demsey vowed as he got the ring from his pocket and slipped it onto your finger.  

“Likewise. Although I would like to make one small suggestion.” You offered as you wiped the last of your tears away. 

“Name it, it’s yours.” Demsey answered back. 

“If we ever get to the point where we need a break from being Duke and Duchess Voyambi, we can take breaks and go out on the town and Mr and Mrs. Draft.” You proposed which got him to smile wide and laugh. 

“That sounds perfect. And we can continue to make bets in Kamoba, as Mr. and Mrs. Draft.” Demsey suggested. 

“Perfect. Now, get what you need, load it onto Charlico because right now, he is yours, because it is only right that a mated pair of griffins be owned by a mated pair of people and fly Charlico home to Whydah.” You ordered as you looked at the aquamarine teal stoned ring with a halo of diamonds around it with so much pride and happiness and now that you knew that it was actually Demsey to save you from everything and that you had no more reasons to try to escape anything, because what you wanted and what you needed was already yours and already in your embrace and being married to Demsey and carrying his children was all you wanted and it made the sting of all the revelations earlier today melt away and you felt strengthened and fortified and so supremely happy because you were happily and freely choosing Demsey just as much as he was happily and freely choosing you, as “complicated” as the circumstances were. 

“Yes Ma’am.” Demsey giggled as he kissed you again. 

“Good dragon, very good dragon. I owe you everything. Thank you so much.” Demsey happily cooed to Grevu who happily wrapped his head and neck around you both and happily soaked up your affectionate petting and scratching just as a servant came into the barn. 

“Is Duke Demsey Voyambi in here?” He called out. 

“Yeah, I’m here,” Demsey said as you untangled from him as Grevu lifted his head to reveal you both and together you walked hand in hand to the servant who looked relieved to see you. 

“And Sultana Saharazat! Oh good, I’ve found you too. Your bets on the Kamoba battles, they have returned along with their payouts.” He said as he handed Demsey a thick letter full of bills and then handed you a large parcel of bills too as you noticed the letters on top as addressed to Mr. Draft and Miss Draft. 

“So who did you bet on?” You asked him. 

“You, you beat out Benny, I bet on you to win the battle and you did.” Demsey said as he took the letter and showed you before you took the letter and showed him. 

“You bet on me too?” He cooed to you as he wrapped his arm around your shoulders and kissed the crown of your head as he read it. 

“And with the pay out being one in 20 that you would win your class, I now have at least 2000 pounds here.” You giggled as you opened it to reveal the stacks of pound notes before you put those into the saddle bag with Heavencrest but kept the note and put it into your pocket. 

“Would you come to Mirador with me today though? I still wish to have your input and sensibilities on how to handle all of the wealth and businesses and how I should alot what I’ve just inherited and who it should go to, but I do have one thing clear in mind, all businesses need to have unions for the workers, everything has a union back in Dorierra and when Jane told me that you were pro union, it of course makes the best sense, earning money is of course the goal but not at the price of the lives of your workers.” You suggested sweetly as he simply pocketed his own winnings but put the actual letter in a bet into his pocket where your ring had once occupied. 

“Of course, I would be delighted to, and I’m honestly happy and relieved we agree on this.” He reassured you before Benny came rushing in with Sierge carrying a whole bag full of money since his bets were structured in such a way that they compounded so he just won over a hundred thousand pounds for Benny beating The Saharan Viper and The Copper Cobra along with your heir father, his wife and his mother. 

“Grevu! Lift this curse off of me right now!” Benny demanded of Grevu as you and Demsey watched her pass you curiously as you snickered a laugh. 

“Shut up Audra! You just won the world! You have no right to laugh at me!” Benny spat angrily as Grevu growled at her before he got up and balled himself up, like a cat curling up on a rug before a fire and turned away from her as your family was coming into the barn to leave too. 

“Aw, does “the happy heart beat” not make you so happy Benny?” You asked her in a teasing, almost taunting tone. 

“Don’t you dare say those words to me, there is nothing happy about this situation at all!” Benny said. 

“Happy heart beat?” Demsey repeated. 

“In the far east- in the emperors harem, that’s how pregnancy is diagnosed and what is said when it’s discovered. It’s a way of diagnosing pregnancy. Dr. Chu told me, that’s why I told Sierge to follow Benny and stay with her.” You revealed. 

“And thats...” Demsey began as he looked at you questioningly. 

“Yup.”  You eagerly nodded with a bright smile. 

“Oh good you have not left yet.” Your mother blew out a breath of relief at seeing you as all of them were carrying small packets of money, won from them betting on you for winning the Kamoba tournament. 

“No, Demsey is coming to Mirador with us, since he’s been running his businesses with great success in the English market, I want his input to help me decide what I should do with all of the Morrigan’s businesses and help me decide who should get what.” You explained as you happily stood with your arm around his waist as he stood with his arm around your shoulders and happily held the other to your side as Benny just rolled her eyes in annoyance. 

“Axal! Get your ass down here and have Grevu take this curse off of me this instant! He cursed me last night before the night Kamoba games and I refuse to live another moment under it!” Benny screamed down the barn which got everyone to stare at her in confusion except for you and Demsey who were content to just stand back and see how this was going to play out. 

“How did he curse you?” Axal asked with a barely contained grin. 

“He just...did! I just need him to lift it!” Benny hotly demanded. 

“Right. I don’t believe you. Unless you can give me solid proof and evidence that he did and show me how he cursed you, I’m not getting involved at all.” Axal dismissed as he waived her off and began to walk away. 

“He got me pregnant!” Benny desperately confessed as everyone gasped and stared at Benny in shock as you couldn’t help it, you snorted and snickered a laugh which soon infected Demsey too and the others around you. 

“Wow! You had sex with Grevu? By heaven above, Sierge’s dick isn’t enough for you that you had to fuck my dragon?! How did he even fit…?” Axal began to ask.

“No! I didn’t fuck your dragon, his cock would split me in half! No, I...he made the seed that was already in me take root and now his magic is protecting that root and I need him to lift his protection of that root so I can remove it!” Benny finally confessed. 

“And whose “root” is it?” Axal asked. 

“Who knows, it could be mine, it could be Viscount Whiteales or any of the other orc gentlemen  you were schmoozing with at the Kamoba lunch and dinner feasts, it’s hard to tell with a whoring slut like her.” Sierge said as everyone ‘ooooh’ed’ with another snickering laugh as Anavia and Loreiris tsked and shook their heads. 

“Your mother will be so disappointed in you. You knew penilie- vaginal sex was forbidden for this very reason, is this why you couldn’t get the dowager status?” Loreiris asked. 

“Yes, it’s cost me everything! Now Grevu, take it back!” Benny demanded. 

“But what about that leverage you were going to use against Audra when and if she could not get you that Dowager status? Surely you can’t fault her- for you- not getting it, because we were all there to hear how she wanted all of us to have that status and didn’t single you out to not have it.” Loreiris pointed out. 

“You were going to betray Audra after everything she did for you?” Your mother scuffed in disgust. 

“No, I wasn’t, I swear!” Benny said as real fear came back into her eyes. 

“But you told me that you were going to.” Loreiris insisted. 

“And me,” your heir father insisted. 

“And me,” his wife Maradiem added. 

“And me,” his mother Anavia added. 

“It was just something to say for the Kamoba, I didn’t mean it!” Benny pleaded as your whole family began coming towards her and began to surround her as everyone was glaring at her before she was pushed back so that her back hit the wall. 

“What is going on now?” Yalin and her children asked as they came into the stables to see your family off and saw Benny as she ducked and dodged through your family to get to her. 

“Please Mama Yalin, you have to help me! Grevu cursed me so that seed took root in my womb and his magic is protecting the root and I need it removed before I could ever go back to Dorierra!” Benny pleaded. 

“Well whose seed was it?” Yalin asked. 

“Sierge’s.” Benny finally confessed. 

“Are you sure? You were seen practically hanging all over all the other orc families yesterday, it could have been any of theirs, after all, you were offering all of them the leverage you had collected for Gregori against Audra and Demsey so Audra could be with Ramsey, but obviously, you see how that didn’t go so well.” Loreiris said as she gestured to you and Demsey as well as to Ramsey who was between Axal and Octavia. 

“So you were going to try to sell that leverage to the highest bidder?” Yalin asked Benny as she pulled away from Benny and fixed her with a disapproving glare. 

“No!” Benny shook her head no. 

“That’s not what she told everyone else, I specifically overheard her tell Kate Whitesale and her brother that she would give that leverage to them so that Kate would be the next Duchess Voyambi and that Benny would be the next Viscountess Whitesale since Sierge was the second son and heir to nothing and had no power or wealth to his name because it all rested with Demsey and how getting that leverage came with ‘the unfortunate side effect of Sierge’s attentions and affections which you did not at all return’.” Loreiris paraphrased. 

“I overheard those exact sentiments too, you offered the same thing to the other orc families that day too and swore up and down how you had Sierge’s unwanted and unreciprocated attentions and affections and how you needed “saving from him”.” Axal insisted. 

“Oh dear, did you get caught in your own web?” Yalin asked Benny as she shook her head and looked so profoundly disappointed. 

“Well, unfortunately, I’m afraid I can’t help you. Because the right thing to do was once you saw that whatever leverage you got by whatever means you used, was no longer wanted or needed, you should have been a good friend to Audra and forgotten all about it. Because I never asked you to get that leverage and I never wanted it used against Audra. Who has clearly already had enough horrible tactics used on her.” Yalin offered. 

“And I never asked you to get leverage on her either. So your leverage was and is completely useless to me.” Ramsey insisted. 

“Nor I.” Charlotte chimed in. 

“No but your father did!” Benny insisted to Ramsey and Charlotte. 

“Right, the same one who hired a doctor to poison an old man to death, how did that turn out by the way?” Ramsey sarcastically mocked her before turned to his mother. 

“Horribly. I fear your father faces some intense discipline and will be forced to pay recompense with interest for years and years to come.” Yalin answered. 

“And once it is known that you are with child, that classifies you as “fallen” and no man in nobility in any country either here or anywhere else in Europa wants a fallen lady, no one will want to claim you. I suppose if you have anyone at Dorierra will take you on- in such a condition, that would be what’s best but for fallen ladies, there are few choices. Maybe the father might be induced to take you, if he will have you but only if you had not betrayed him or tried to cast him off before hand. But with the fortune Sierge just won from the Kamoba, he could have any number of ladies.” Yalin said as she gestured to him. 

“And with that fortune he could buy any number of the businesses I just inherited, so it’s not like he’s left with nothing, no fortune or income or power or influence, he could be a man of industry and wealth that might even exceed his brother and he could always claim his own title of nobility, it might not be as high as a Duke but it’s better than nothing, after all we are all Maquis now right?” You pointed out to everyone else who had agreed on staying in England. 

“But he’s the one who gave me the leverage against you in the first place!” Benny said as she pointed at Sierge accusingly as everyone then looked at Sierge. 

“Look, you and your hands and mouth were very persuasive but I only told you what you wanted to hear. It’s not like anything that I told you was necessarily completely true or at all accurate or even current. Because what’s that saying? Something only ten percent true is still 100% misleading? You’re not the only one who knows how to work other people and you weren’t subtle about the fact that you were working me, but thanks for the inside info to bet on you against the Saharan Viper, even as dirty as you played her, I now have enough money to buy any bride I wanted from Dorierra if I ever wanted one, or I could just as easily court and marry any eligible lady here in England. So, all in all, thanks Benny for doing me the backhanded favor.” Sierge winked at Demsey with a smug smile himself a shrug from his shoulders. 

“But the fact that you’re not just willing, but desperately wanting to kill my unborn child because it just happens to inconvenience you and puts your treachery on display and exposes you for who and what you really are. I don’t know if I want you as a wife. I can’t trust that you wouldn’t hurt any other children I could ever give to you if I were to take you as my wife, for any number of reasons. So go ahead, let Grevu lift his protection from you and “uproot” the little sapling and destroy it before it can sprout any further as you so chose to phrase it. You’re free of my attentions and affections as of this moment and every moment to come, exactly how you wanted to be, right?” Sierge questioned rhetorically as even you could see the beginning of tears start to make his eyes glassy as he tried to remain composed as even you could feel how profoundly hurt he was by this betrayal too. 

“Yes, you know why? Because you never once respected me! Or women in general. You treated me like a pet, a toy, you feel a woman’s place is in the home, birthing heirs and too stupid for anything else, helpless and weak and completely dependant. I am so much more than you could ever comprehend, let alone appreciate. And being forced to be bonded, much less married to a stupid, honorless, pig headed, stubborn, egotistical, selfish, much less completely incompetent, lackluster lover, who is as reckless with honor as he is money. You are ruination itself! And you will lose all of that wealth as quickly as you got it!” Benny roared angrily as everyone blinked in surprise. 

“Wow, been holding that in for a while now huh?” Calla asked Benny. 

“Yes, and I’m done, Leumeni, Coravien, come on, we’re leaving. we are going home to Dorierra, we can still catch the train.” Benny barked at her brothers. 

“I’m not leaving with you. I’m free, remember? Unlike you, I got dowager status, so I don’t answer to you. Besides, everything I could ever want and need is right here with me in England. Not in Dorierra.” Leumeni answered back calmly as he looked to Kiera who happily took his hand and held it tight. 

“And you’re more than welcome to stay at Mirador while you find a fine house of your own.” You offered to him. 

“Thanks, I’ll take you up on that.” Leumeni smiled happily. 

“Me too, if Demsey will take me on as a partner in his soap business, I’ll give him every soap recipe I know and we can have the same soaps and things here that we do at home. Besides, I’m a Marquis here in England and the King offered me a living of ten thousand pounds a year, which I understand is a lot and the other orc ladies here are actually really pretty. So I’m staying too.” Coravien answered his sister back too. 

“Yeah can I get in on that soap thing too?” Leumeni asked. 

“Absolutely. I’d be happy to have you on board.” Demsey readily agreed as you smiled happily at him as you squeezed him into your side and being so proud to have such a wonderful man as your fiance. 

“And London needs a proper moura restaurant,” Storren pointed out. 

“Yeah, I ain't going back either, I’d love to open a good moura restaurant. Give that Savoy I keep hearing about a good run for its money.” Brima grinned. 

“And my place is with Tzane, I ain’t going back either, not until I marry Tzane and we go back together to gather all of my things from Dorrierra so I can fully move here, Whydah is from what I hear a large home, big enough for more than one couple.” Calla shrugged. 

“Mama Yalin?” You called out. 

“Yes Audra Dear?” Yalin asked, happy and elated that you were still speaking to her in such an affectionate way, having feared that Gregori had completely destroyed your relationships with their entire family. 

“Would it be possible to get a marriage license for Demsey and I to get married sooner than later, he has asked me to marry him and I’ve accepted, and I would like to get married within the week at least so that all the members of my family who wish to return to Dorierra can see me get married in the moura tradition before they leave to go home to Dorierra?” You asked her hopefully as you raised your left hand and turned it so she could see it as everyone gasped excitedly and cheered to see it before offering their congratulations to both of you. 

“Surely you can postpone your departure from England for a day or two can’t you Benny? You could still go back with my family when they want to go back.” You offered rather sweetly, if not just a tad smugly because what you had told her in the Kamoba battle was coming true, just the way the gods and goddesses had told you it would. 

“Only if Grevu will lift this curse off of me first.” Benny decided. 

“Grevu, go ahead, do as she asks. Lift the protection.” Axal decided before Benny marched down and kneeled in front of Grevu who blew a red smoke over her and then inhaled it all back in a moment later. 

“Thank you, you overgrown rat with wings.” Benny snipped as she turned away from him before Grevu spitefully growled and knocked her down onto the floor on her way out with his snout as Benny cursed in pain before she felt the pain seep and radiate from her lower belly as she clutched it as everyone else just shook their heads and carried on with business of getting ready to leave as Siege simply walked out of the barn and towards the carriage with his other siblings and their partners since his parents had left Buckingham palace to their London home right after the “court” was ajourned. 

“You ready Demsey Darling?” You asked Demsey as you both got into Heavencrest’s and Charlico’s saddles respectfully. 

“Absolutely Audra Dearest.” Demsey grinned before he put the helmet on before Heavencrest and Charlico raced to reach to the skies as Demsey and yourself flew to Mirador to discuss business with your family and friends, including Marquise Bellafont because you wanted her to tell her children herself of their own freedom and rise to nobility since the King and Queen had quickly signed off on her nobility so she could show it to her children herself. 

Once you arrived home, Rose, Myra’s eldest daughter, was the first to greet you. 

“My Lady, you would not believe what the papers have been saying about you.” Rose began. 

“Rose, I love you dearly, but I need you to go back inside and get dressed in your Sunday best, your mother is coming with really fantastic, exciting news, and get all of your siblings and tell them to do the same.” You excitedly told her. 

“Really?” Rose asked you. 

“Yes really, and after today, you and your siblings are servants to no one, not even me.” You hinted as she gasped as she looked from you to Duke Demsey who was nodding in confirmation with you, wearing a similar smile. 

“Excuse me then,” Rose happily excused herself as she rushed back into the house and called all of her siblings together and repeated what you told them as they all quickly left and got dressed in their Sunday best and packed everything they owned before their mother arrived and eagerly embraced her children and revealed the truth and then repeated what the King and Queen had told her what the story should be as they all agreed to the story before they came back to you as all of them hugged you tight before you presented them with your winnings. 

“Now, this is all I was able to win in the Kamoba battle, take this money, go to a really good dress shop or even a few of them, put this down as a down payment on your new wardrobes. I want every member of your family to dress and appear as lofty as your station permits. I have some jewelry I wish to bestow upon all of you. Although I will insist that all of Agnes’ jewelry be given to Jane along with anything else Jane has any sentimental attachments to and I understand if Jane would like to inherit her mother’s connections and will use them how she sees fit.” You insisted. 

“Oh of course, of course.” Myra readily agreed. 

“Now it will take time to save up some money for decent dowries for the ladies. But once everyone else gets here, and we all discuss together how we are going to divide everything. I’m sure by the end of tonight, all of us will be satisfied with the outcomes.” You reassured them. 

“Thank you Audra, you’ve been so good to us, is there anything we can do to repay you?” Rose asked as she hugged you again. 

“Just stick to the story that the King proclaimed, be kind and good to Jane and especially little Edward. He will miss his parents, but hopefully when he grows up, he will learn to accept things. And I want all of you to have the same freedom I’m going to enjoy, and that is to choose for yourselves what your lives will be, who you marry and marry for love if you can at all possible, if you even want to get married that is. But choose happiness, whatever that may be and I will do my best to find some kind of tutor, so that all of you get the same education and same learning and gain understanding of business so that you handle your new acquisitions well and not squander it or let anyone take advantage of you either. You are neither servant or slave to anyone’s will but your own from this moment on.” You urged them before everyone seemed to arrive as you introduced your family to Myra’s children. 

You all crammed in around your table as several ladies had to take on the laps of their partners as your steward from Broadcove, Mr. Chattingham, who was so happy to hear of your own victory and in a way, Myra’s victory over his own former masters was key in knowing all the businesses that Edward Senior, Richard and Agnes had, and doubted much had changed in the year since his service to them ended and had incredible insights on what businesses would be best for each of your brothers as well as Myra’s sons as you and Demsey insisted that each business would have a union to protect it’s workers as Mr. Chattingham named who Richard had hired to specifically root out union organizers within his businesses as you knew already who you were going to be immediately firing before you hand them over since your parents had gotten word before they left that a messenger from the King along with Scotland Yard had been dispatched to all of the banks and other businesses and was in the process of having it all turned over to you and put into your name as it was immediately a prerequisite that the unions would be brought in and stay in place or you would not hand any of them over because even in Dorierra, every Dorrieran man was in his own union with the stables so such a thing was not new to you or anyone from your family as even Sierge offered to buy a business himself so that he had something other than his family’s soap business and his soon to be brother in law’s restaurant, but something to call all his own before there was a knock on the door. 

“Hi, I’m Mage Amaryllis, Mage Altissia informed me that there was a spell on this house to disable the messengeraries? And she asked me to come and lift it.” She offered. 

“Yes, thank you so much for coming, please, do whatever you can.” You invited her. 

“Thank you.” She said before she found the absolute center point of the house and closed her eyes before moving and gesturing around herself as you saw what looked like magic shackles begin to break around the messengeraris in each room before she did a pulling down motion from the ceiling and all of a sudden it felt like a fresh breeze flowed through the house as the very air felt lighter and less stuffy or still or smothering. 

“There, much better, things should be working much better and much smoother from now on.” Mage Amaryllis smiled. 

“Thank you so much, how much do I owe you?” You asked. 

“Nothing, the King and Queen have already paid me and I just came from Broadcove and have already lifted this same spell from there. But if you ever do need anything else, either magically or otherwise, here’s my messengerari address as well as my own home address here in London, write or call any time.” She said as she handed you a card with her name and contact information written on it as she had another one for Myra before everyone else also took a card from her before she saw herself out before Myra and all of her children did the same as you assured them that they were all definately invited to your wedding whenever you got a chance to plan it and execute it. 

“Ok, I need to try something.” You told your family as you left the dining room and went to the living room took the keypad on the messengerari in the livingroom and punched in the address to your other friends back in Dorierra and smiled excitedly as your friends faces then began to fill the surface as they were equally surprised and happy and excited to see you. 

“Demsey!” You called as he came in before you took his hand and introduced him to your friends. 

“This is Duke Demsey Voyambi, I’m marrying him as soon as our marriage license comes through and it will be a love match this time.” You informed them proudly as they all gasped and gushed and squealed and offered you their congratulations. 

“So like, how soon is soon?” Jenniverre asked. 

“Probably a few days,” Demsey answered. 

“Oh that’s more than enough time, who wants to fly to London with me?” Jenniverre asked everyone who was on the group call. 

“Oh give me an hour to get packed, do you have a room where we could stay?” Jenniverre asked. 

“Yes. Is there any way you guys can bring some figs? Like bushel baskets full or even saplings?” You asked hopefully. 

“Yeah, why?” They asked. 

“Pregnancy cravings.” You answered in Marinai with a bashful blush and smile. 

“And? Was it at least good?” They eagerly asked. 

“Oh, how divine is the god’s blessing!” You said as you waived your hand above your head which was a marinai euphemism for meaning ‘sex so good it’s as if you were having actual sex with the gods’ which got them all to giggle and laugh salaciously. 

“Oooh, of course of course, yeah, you got it, we’ll stop by the greenhouses.” Adrilody confirmed. 

“We’ll be there as soon as we can get packed and saddled up, we’re flying in, see you soon! I can’t wait!” Jenniverre squealed as she and the others quickly got off the call. 

“As if this house wasn’t full enough.” You chuckled to Demsey. 

 “Well Whydah is huge, they are just as welcome there too, any friend of yours is a friend of mine, just as any enemy of yours is an enemy of mine too.” Demsey offered. 

“Thank you.” You thanked him appreciatively as you stood on tip toe as he ducked down to kiss you easier as he couldn’t help but palm your lower belly reverently. 

“What does ‘savacia’ mean?” Demsey asked.

“Pregnancy cravings.” You answered. 

“Wow, this early?” Demsey asked. 

“Oh yeah, moura’s can tell almost instantaneously when we get pregnant, morning sickness hits early but really only lasts a week at the most, usually only a few days, Grevu hid my morning sickness by making you and Axal start throwing up and I was so distracted with the mourkatili poisoning and Dr. Chu did say that I would have cravings but what’s usually the go to thing that those who have been cured from mourkatili is actually- vegetables, like celery, usually rhubarb. So for me, the figs were a surprise and I didn’t think anything of it.” You murmured.

“Who said “savacia”?” Your mother asked as she came into the living room from having walked down the hallway from the bathroom that was in the hallway. 

“I didn’t. Calla?” Benny asked her as she came down from claiming a room of her own upstairs. 

“Nope, I did.” You volunteered. 

“The figs! Figs are your savacia?!” Your mother exclaimed excitedly.

“Yeah, that’s kind of why I really wanted to get married, rather quickly, to the father.” You answered as you nodded over to Demsey as everyone came rushing in and congratulating you again. 

“So I was right?! You are pregnant!” Benny gasped as a smug smile threatened to overtake her face. 

“Yes I am, about three and a half weeks along.” You confirmed. 

“So I was right about you getting pregnant at the Masquerade Ball.” Benny beamed, feeling vindicated that she her hunch was right. 

“Yup, but not by any manwhore as you so claimed, but by him, he just changed his clothes and went under our assumed names we gave each other so as not to cause any suspicion and we’ve been secretly courting for say, the last two months would you say? Keeping it so secret and hidden away was especially hard on both of us, especially when I was being pursued by the Raymonds, wasn’t it?” You readily supplied your family as Demsey didn’t dare disagree with you because that sounded like the perfect explanation for everything as he found himself smiling brightly because that should have been the truth because he had every intention of telling you he wanted to court you at the ball at Havenfield but he got interrupted by Ramsey in the art gallery. 

“So hi, I’m Audra Draft, pleasure to meet you.” You said to Benny as you offered your hand to shake hers as she looked both disgusted and disappointed by the fact that her “leverage” wasn’t even real leverage at all as she crossed her arms under her bountiful bosom and scowled at you before you let your hand drop. 

“You! You lied to me!” Benny accused Sierge who was just grinning smugly himself, proud of his brother for finally connecting the dots so to speak but he wasn’t about to disagree with those sentiments. 

“Yup, it’s true, I did lie to you, because what kind of brother would I be if I actually gave my brother up for something as meaningless as what you talked up our exchange to be? Demsey only gave me Audra’s assumed name, to protect her and her honor and I respected him enough to respect his wishes in protecting her and her honor. Something which you’ve been hell bent on destroying since the beginning. And I wasn’t going to let you actually have anything capable of destroying me and my family.” Sierge tossed back as Benny narrowed her eyes dangerously at him. 

“But since she’s pregnant, she’s not “fallen” too?” Benny demanded. 

“No, absolutely not, I’m the one that got her that way and I have every intention of making her an honorable and upstanding lady and no one would dare question me or my word about the matter and it’s still early enough that when we take our honeymoon to anywhere she wants to go, it’s not uncommon for new brides to come home pregnant from their honeymoon.” Demsey reasoned. 

“Just think, the same could have been for you, if you hadn’t insisted on “uprooting my seed” as you so “delicately” put it.” Sierge murmured from his corner across the room. 

“So? How was it? Was it good at least?” Axal murmured in your ear. 

“Oh how divine is the gods blessing!” You repeated with the same way you did before which got your whole family to cheer and laugh as Benny scuffed in disgust. 

“You know, maybe you should go back to Dorierra, you’ve beaten The Saharan Viper in Kamoba of all things, surely any man would think twice before harassing you on the train.” Your mother suggested with a forced polite smile.

“You will have to hurry, the last train leaves in an hour and a half.” Tzane suggested as he looked at the time from the clock in the room. 

“Fine, I will.” Benny said as she went back upstairs and got repacked as you called your carriage around and got Benny’s things loaded up as she used her remaining fee she had been paid just for coming as Leumeni and Coravien saw her off. 

“Well now, shall we go out to dinner? To the Savoy perhaps?” You suggested to everyone else once Benny rode away in the carriage. 

“But I’ll need you to help me get dressed,” you urged Demsey before taking him by the hand and leading him upstairs to your bedroom to finally strip out of your pant suit since you had long since peeled yourself out of your riding leathers and the moment the door was shut Demsey’s hands were already all over you, practically ripping these clothes off of you.  

“So what does “ah-shamala-show-in” mean?” Demsey asked as you helped him get undressed to a degree too as you walked him towards a chair for a quick sex session before dinner. 

“It means ‘oh how divine is the gods blessing’ in the literal translation. But it’s a euphemism in marinai that means ‘sex so good it’s like having sex with a god’.” You giggled as you got him into the chair and readily seated yourself on your now familiar friend and began to ride him with gusto. 

“Ah, that makes everyone’s reactions much more understandable. And may I just say- the feeling is very much mutual.” Demsey happily replied as he drove up into you with equal passion as he held you so close and looked up at you like you were a goddess he would be devoutly worshiping for the rest of his life as you welcomed his affections with open arms, literally, as your moura marks were lighting up the room brighter than any candle or fire could. 

“Gods I just should have told you sooner, I should have been able to tell you at the ball at Havenfield that I wanted to court you.” Demsey confessed as nipped at your ear after kissing up the column of your graceful neck. 

“I have a feeling you were about to before Ramsey cut you off.” You smiled as your fingers carded through his hair and scratched deliciously at his scalp while his own fingernails raked down your back as his cock was exactly what your body had been craving this whole time as you were almost beside yourself in happiness that you actually sexually craved your soon to be husband and were almost helplessly attracted to him on every level. 

“I should have been rude and insisted on saying it anyway.” Demsey confided. 

“Well in my mind and heart, you did and obviously, you have my answer.” You giggled before you kissed him soundly. 

“You can say that you wanted to keep it quiet out of respect for Ramsey and of course Gregori and Yalin and you wanted to make sure that I had my choice of any bachelor of my choosing but seeing me being openly courted by another just cemented our feelings for each other and simply as a ruse you pretended to be interested in your other options.” You reassured him just before you found your release and, for the sake of the others in the house, you kept your keening cry of bliss down by biting down on the juncture of his neck and shoulder and whimpering while your body shuddered in delight which only spurned Demsey to finally release his precious seed into the only “field” it belonged in as he held you so tight. 

“I am never, ever- letting you go.” Demsey professed as he nuzzled the crux of your neck and shoulder and breathed in deeply, cementing this wonderful smell of you in his mind and was so relieved that the woman who he had fallen in love with and the woman he had fallen into lust with- were the same woman and supremely relieved that any stigma or jealousy you may have felt when you found out about the “other Audra” was now done and over with and any he had felt had melted into nothingness. This was so much better than he could have ever hoped, or imagined or even feared and once you both recovered he, very patiently and lovingly helped you get dressed in a gown that you insisted matched what he was wearing so that you looked like a proper couple before simply putting your hair up in a simple bun to hide it’s rather shortened nature.

You returned downstairs to where your family had gathered and had to take a few carriages to the restaurant before they happily got one big table put together as Demsey invited his parents back for the meal to see for themselves  and they were so happy and overjoyed to have you in the family even if they were disappointed that Benny had chosen not to stay with Sierge but they were relieved and pleasantly surprised to hear the news of your “secret” courting of their son and realized that was why you were polite with Ramsey but were not returning his efforts and realized that Demsey had actually played that circumstance cleverly and were thrilled to have Leumeni and Coravien added to the family soap business as well as Leumeni, Calla and Storren added to their family and eagerly talked to Brima and Coravien about the other orc ladies that were in the gentry before as they of course had their own ideas about the wedding as Demsey made sure to insist that it should be as soon as your friends could arrive and that it should be rather small, with only family and close friends because your wedding to Edward had been so big and such a huge ordeal that you didn’t need or want that big of a wedding which you readily agreed with which his parents could not argue with as it was readily agreed that the London home would be better equipped to handle such an affair then since the majority of the guests would be at your own home as Amara and Storren also announced their courting, along with Kiera and Leumeni and Calla and Tzane as their weddings would be much more planned and prepared because Calla, Kiera and Amara wanted the bigger, grander weddings which you and Demsey did confirm you would be back from your honeymoon in time to attend and you were all relieved when Demesy’s parents gladly accepted the cover that the King had insisted on, especially with you and Jane especially providing off the cuff “details” that added more “authenticity” to it and made it sound closer to the gospel truth as it was accepted as such as Jane was given the most sincerest sympathies for the sudden loss of her parents and their sanity but the fact that she was protected because of her being at the Palace of Windsor as you continued to eat dinner with Demsey on one side of you and Jane on the other, just as it should be. 

[opting-for-oblivion]

This AU will not leave me alone, so fine. Collins in the Caribbean.

More serious:

Mr. Collins is basically just cut and pasted into the PotC timeline, along with some other minor P&P elements that have to do with his character but that don’t really change the PotC plot that much, if at all.

He’s a cousin of the Becketts, though not meant to inherit anything from them.

Maybe he was, at one point, intended to marry Beckett’s sister, Jane? (As unlikely as I am to actually make this a serious AU, Jane would be an interesting ghost to have unspoken between them...)

Collins is still a clergyman of a well-off parish back in England. (This is also a bit of an unspoken tension between Collins and Beckett, because Beckett’s father wanted him to join the clergy as well. Collins may have even been the inspiration for Beckett Sr. trying to get Cutler to join the clergy, as an alternative to joining the family trading company...)

Lady Catherine de Bourgh exists and is still Mr. Collins’ esteemed patroness. She still low-key bullies him about getting married, which may or may not inspire his visit to his cousin.

I’m not exactly sure when this is supposed to be taking place, but definitely sometime after The Price of Freedom, maybe even during DMC / AWE? (As I said, this AU is unlikely to go anywhere that actually demands a rational plot.)

Less serious:

The entire inspiration for this AU is that Collins and Beckett are such opposite characters it’s hilarious. Beckett would hate Collins. The crack plot that follows from this is just “Mr. Collins visits his cousin, Lord Beckett, and annoys the hell out of him, but Beckett can’t really do anything about it.”

I know that Collins is generally insufferable as a person, but he’s actually just rather awkward. This AU is so much funnier when it’s just Beckett that loathes Mr. Collins, meanwhile everyone else actually kind of likes how mundane and oblivious the man is (or at least tolerates him and doesn’t see what the fuss is).

It’s almost inevitable that Collins and Beckett end up discussing patrons at some point. Mr. Collins goes on and on about Lady Catherine and Beckett listens with mild interest because this is perhaps the first useful thing his cousin has ever said. As far as Beckett is concerned, any connection with the English aristocracy is worth noting. Very much, “How can  I  we use that to my our advantage?” Of course, Collins is entirely dumbfounded by such thinking. If Collins asks if Beckett has ever had a patron, Beckett might (very bitterly) mention Lord Penwallow, but he’s entirely dispassionate and rather closed on the subject...

If Mr. Collins ever went to dinner with the Swanns, it would take every ounce of self control in Governor Swann’s body to not adopt the man immediately out of pity. If Beckett had to attend the same dinner, he’d last 5 minutes before wanting to either stab himself or his cousin.

The worst case scenario for “how boring and annoying and insanity-inducing can Collins be” (in Beckett’s opinion) is if the man were to find himself in conversation with Jack Sparrow or Pintel & Ragetti -- gods forbid all three. Sparrow would just nod along as Mr. Collins talks about the most random things and occasionally encourage him with new talking points, whereas Pintel & Ragetti would actively engage in the most harebrained discussions.

Imagine Pintel, Ragetti, and Mr. Collins discussing the Bible. 

Cutler “I Killed God Myself” Beckett and William “Reads Sermons For Fun” Collins are certainly one wrong religious comment away from a total mess. That said, Beckett’s atheism doesn’t really register with Collins at all. Collins is just too oblivious.

You know how, in P&P, when Mr. Collins visits Lady Catherine, he’s like,,,rattling off facts about her estate and the price of her carpets? While other people are talking? That, but about the EITC and Beckett’s things. While Beckett is talking. Beckett can’t take it. He fucking snaps.

I feel like a requirement of the "two characters who almost look identical" premise is that they get mixed up at least once. Obviously their professions usually stop that from happening, as their manners of dress are too markedly different, but somehow it has to happen.

[9worldstales]

Loki & Thor in “Thor & Loki – Double Trouble” n° 3

It seems I forgot to post my thoughts for “Thor & Loki – Double Trouble” 3 so here they are.

We left the brother falling in a hole. Well, the fall seems to be quite long in an “Alice in Wonderland” fashion and, instead than constantly panicking like Loki seems to do in “Thor: Ragnarok” the two apparently had grown quite comfortable with it, Thor perfectly straight, head down with his arms crossed while Loki seems almost seated, arms crossed behind his head and legs also crossed.

I do wonder which kind of adventures they usually live if they can get comfortable in such a situation.

Anyway, to Loki’s question if Thor has heard something, Thor insists all he could hear is the wind of Loki’s idiocy. Really, it’s worrisome Thor believes Loki is an idiot and yet he insists on playing along with his schemes. As Obi-Wan Kenobi would say ‘Who's the more foolish, the fool or the fool who follows him?’

I get why Loki can call himself the smart brother of the two, at least he’s not following the fool.

Anyway Loki dismisses the fact he has maybe heard a voice to ask Thor if he wants to play a game. Really, this Loki is someone who’s desperate for his brother’s attention… in the most terrible way because his way to get it is by being overall terrible.

Thor, you’re the older, you should try teaching him he can have your attention without getting you two in troubles.

Also I’d like to know how to play ‘Rock, hammer, dagger’, which Loki suggests, offering with an enthusiastic smile to even let Thor play first… since Thor turns the offering down saying he won’t give Loki another chance to stab him.

Is it a version of ‘Rock, paper, scissor’, only instead than making hand gesture you literally use them to hit your opponent?

Whatever, there’s a light at the end of the tunnel, Loki notices it and as he praises himself for being the smarter… neither of the two attempts to place himself in a position that would make their landing better.

Thor falls straight on his face because for some reasons he moves behind the arms he has raised while Loki falls on his back.

Loki would like to know for how long they had been falling but Thor counters the smart question would be where they landed… to which Loki replies it wasn’t a competition for best questions. I love this Loki. I get Thor might feel like strangling him but I can’t help but love him… though if I were in Thor’s place either I find a way to handle him better or I might consider strangling him as well.

Thor thinks they’re in Jotunheim and proves his point by sniffing a rock. I don’t know what Jotunheim rocks smell like, I didn’t even know they were meant to have a distinctive smell. I though they would be ice shaped as rocks or rocks covered in ice. Whatever, every day you can learn something new, in this case that Thor can recognize Jotunheim by the smell of the rocks.

Loki thinks the orb can bring them back only… to discover he lost it. He’s not happy when Thor points it out. Thor, blaming him for losing the orb and asking him for a solution, tosses the rock away… and it predictably hit someone who was previously concealed from everyone’s sight, who’s clearly big, dangerous, with many friends (which also were concealed from everyone’s sight… really guys, why so many people hidden? And mountain giants, no less! Where you playing ‘hide and seek’?) and not happy to receive a rock on his head.

Meanwhile Loki and Thor argue. Loki claims it was his idea to fall into the tunnel and Thor says he was merely being foolish and using something he didn’t understand to clean up the mess he made and is again avoiding responsibilities and getting him in troubles. Really Thor, if you thought so, WHY DID YOU ENABLE HIM TO DO SO INSTEAD OF STOPPING HIM?

I’ve a younger brother who used to be troublesome, I didn’t use to tell him ‘yeah, go for it’ when he came up with a dumb idea and follow after him with my fingers crossed in hope it didn’t get us killed! You aren’t even tagging along because you want to babysit him, you just let yourself be completely roped by his crazy schemes and then complain if they go predictably wrong…

Also Loki, sweetheart, really, no need to lie when it’s obvious it’s a lie. As the smartest brother don’t do it, unless you enjoy arguing with Thor, which I fear is exactly the point of all this mess. You really have to learn you can get attention from him with better methods, you know?

Anyway while Thor is complaining, completely focused on his own complain Loki notices the giants approaching and tries to warn Thor.

Should I point out I love how Gurihiru, in those four panels manages to give them different expressions and poses while keeping them in the same spot in the image merely having them do a discussion?

But back to the story Thor finally notices they’re surrendered… so he accepts Loki’s suggestions they should just run away.

I love their faces as they realize so!

Though really, this time they don’t attempt to pass for brave.

Loki asks Thor which is the plan, Thor demands to know why he’s in charge of the plan and Loki points out Thor doesn’t like his own plan to which Thor agrees because he claims since Loki is the God of mischief he doesn’t have plans but fiendish plots… while Thor’s plan turns out to just hit people in the teeth with his hammer.

Great plan, Thor… -_- but really, for once Loki is deferring to you and he’s right, you don’t like his plans so why are you complaining he put you in charge of making plans?

As they talk a hammer goes past them and then SHE appears.

The goddness of Thunder. AKA Thor.

Which I’ll call ‘Lady Thor’ from now on, to make things simpler to follow.

What follows are again 4 wonderful panels of the siblings being confused (I love Thor’s expression and Loki tilting his head) before Loki satisfied point out this means they aren’t in Jotunheim and they found another Thor and not another Loki because Lokis are very rare and special...

...and Loki, love, I adore you but, first of all, I think it’s hard to manage with just one of you and second, you’re basically inviting disaster because I just know this means a Loki will show up as well.

But I love you anyway.

Female Thor doesn’t waste her time and starts beating the rock giants, pointing out Thor and Loki could make themselves useful as well.

Thor reminds himself he has a hammer as well and could help. Loki says he was just giving her space and be chivalrous. It’s kind of fun how Loki doesn’t seem to want to fight but when they started fighting he can hold his ground pretty well.

Once they’re done, Loki and Thor introduce themselves to Lady Thor. Loki is polite about it, bowing to her while Thor does so in his own boisterous manner (I love how each of them has his own panel with Lady Thor looking at each of them as they introduce)…

...which pushes Lady Thor to decide there’s not enough space in that universe for two Thors so the two attempts to fight things out before Loki realizes he has the wonderful chance to put not one but TWO Thors at work into one of his crazy competitions to see who’ll be Thor (Christmas has come early for Loki, indeed)…

...and like any true loving brother informs Lady Thor he’s rooting for her, which annoys his own brother.

They still decide to go for a competition that’s not the ‘there can be only one’ Highlander style of competition.

Thor suggests hammer toss, rejected because simple, Lady Loki best lighting strike rejected because subjective so Thor tries again with something involving strength, arm wrestle. Lady Thor, who must be more clever than him pretends to thinks it over, clearly figuring out he suggests competitions based on strength thinking her weak…

...but in the next page we see her effortlessly winning the arm competition.

Thor, who can’t even accept to lose against himself complains arm wrestle is a sport of mortals.

Lady Thor retorts it’s a good thing HE suggested it. Learn take responsibilities for your failures, Thor and be a positive example for Loki. You’re the big brother after all.

Loki points out they can’t go home without solving the small issue of a missing orb, which is their only mean to go back home.

As Lady Thor considers where it could have ended we see that the orb was retrieved by Lady Loki… who’s planning to have lot of fun with it.

Now there’s a long and complicate story with the identity of Lady Thor and Lady Loki in the Marvel universe… but, I wonder if here the case is merely that both Thor and Loki are gender swapped in that universe (if so could be said in regard to Loki…).

So, is Lady Thor Jane, or she’s the female version of Thor and Lady Loki is her sister? Was it her voice what Loki hear while they were falling or someone else is involved? Or there was just no voice?

We’ll discover in the next episode!

Anyway I continue to love this crazy comic. The characters are very expressive and the situations are funny, although a bit predictable. But whatever, Thor and Loki are love and I love this story.

[letteredlettered]

Have you ever participated in play-by-post role play? I’ve learned about it recently and have become pretty intrigued - it seems like a fun way to write a little and collaborate with others (esp since writing can feel kind of lonely to me, at times). If u have - how did u find the experience/do u have any recommendations?

I’m not sure what play-by-post is, but if you mean LJ-style roleplay (which has moved entirely to Dreamwidth), then yes. I also participated in just a little roleplay in forums, back when people used forums. I know people rp on Tumblr and Twitter, but I don’t get how.

Writing is not lonely to me; I love being alone. I once tried to write a fic with my BFF  @mydaroga​ using roleplay, but we had some trouble coming up with a plot. I also once tried to write a fic with my dirty old man using roleplay--that was fun, but we never finished. The same thing was true then--it was hard to do plot that way, though feelings and character stuff is very fun. I feel like it would be really fun to do an epistolary novel that way.

(My dirty old man was my first fandom friend, when I was 17, in Jane Austen fandom. She’s called my dirty old man, because I told my mom I had a friend on the internet, and she was very concerned. “People can trick you!” she kept saying. And I told my mom that even if my internet friend was a dirty old man and not an female Argentinean human rights lawyer, they still knew an AWFUL lot about Jane Austen and I would treasure them anyway.) 

I started roleplaying on LJ because of the 2009 Startrek Reboot kinkmeme. People started showing up on the kinkmeme as characters, and I decided to make one, and then my BFF made one, and then we were off to the races. I quickly met some great characters and welcoming people, but I ended up not having a super great time.

I do want to @ @mydaroga one more time, because she still rp’s and has a really great time. She can possibly reblog with some recs and info, if she has time.

Below the cut is some of the problems I had with rp.

The problems started really quick. This was casual roleplay, started on a kinkmeme, without the rules and expectations you might find in more codified LJ/DW roleplay, but I soon found myself in situations where people made pretty strong demands of me. For instance, a player playing Character A and I made a little plan for a cool plot for our characters to address an emergency situation. I came home from work one day to find a Character B (whose player I did not enjoy) VERY UPSET that I had set up a plot and then wasn’t there to play it. I was completely confused because a) I wanted to play this plot with A; we had set it up; it was ours entirely; this B had just seen our little idea and decided it belonged to everyone, since it was happening in a fictional world in which Character B also exists, and due to the place Character B had in canon, the player decided B was in charge. In my mind, there was not “one” world; there were simply many little stories we could play out, which didn’t mean we had to include everyone and didn’t mean anyone else could butt in on our story. b) I had replied to A THAT morning, gone to work for 9 hours, come back, and opened LJ to reply right away. For player B, 9 hours was entirely too long for them to wait, and I did not and cannot understand that. I have a job; I have a life; I am someone who struggles to look at their phone--and at the time, most people didn’t even have smartphones. In fact, one reason I GOT a smartphone was because I was so into rp I wanted to be able to keep up, and that seems an unreasonable price to pay to keep up with rp. Why should I be pressured to rp when I’m doing rl things? This really, really rubbed me the wrong way--and it kept happening.

This kind of casual rp is fraught with people who demand to be a part of your play when you don’t want them, and who demand that you reply quicker than you can or are comfortable with. The reason for this brings me to the other aspect of rp that I struggled with: you’re playing characters who have deep feelings and intense relationships. Sometimes your characters fall in love or have sex or fight or kill each other, and this bleeds into rl feelings far more than any other fandom activity in my experience. Even when you’re writing fic and you become the characters, you get to control the entire situation. In rp, you feel what the characters feel, but you don’t get to control what other characters feel. People’s hearts get broken--sometimes because a relationship in rp feels more real and intense than some of our closest rl relationships, and sometimes because people DO have rl, and when they don’t respond to you, it can be hurtful. Sometimes I played characters who did hurtful things, and I didn’t realize it was hurting the player. Other times, I myself was hurt by someone who didn’t reply to me for days; I was too emotionally invested to deal with a lack in response.

If you’re not doing casual rp, but are using the communities on DW set up for such things, you’ll find some rules that will help address these issues. There’s an expectation for how long you’ll take to reply. There’s clear guidelines about when you can join someone’s storyline, when you have to include someone in your storyline, when you have to leave someone alone, how to tell someone to leave you alone. There’s an understanding about character bleed, and there’s community support to address it and talk about it; there are ways to tell someone you’re feeling emotionally invested in a way that can be hurtful; there are ways to protect yourself.

In the end, however, I find myself unhappy with these communities, as I do with lots of structured community both online and irl. When anyone is allowed to come and do anything they want, you get people who bully others, and no one knows what to do about it; feelings get hurt, and the result is chaos. What seems to be a logical way to deal with this is to create strong guidelines that everyone can agree to and support systems for when something goes wrong--but the sad fact is, as a contrary person, these guidelines often rub me the wrong way, and I often feel excluded by the support systems. I hated having to “apply” to LJ rp communities. I hated having to introduce myself in a codified way. I hated rules such as “there can only be one Commander Spock; if you want to play Spock it has to be a different universe or different age of Spock.”

In the end, I feel I thrive in the liminal space between anarchy and structured communities. Perhaps this is why I have always felt drawn to things that are fringe. I would be very happy to rp again if I could do it casually, but tbh I would probably dip at the first sign of in-fighting.

[jade-marie]

Top 10 books fics I read in 2020

Tagged by @sothischickshe

I don’t read books. I’m trash. So have my top 10 fics. These aren’t in any real order, btw.

Finally got round to adding some content to each one. Send word to my family, I died doing this. All the fluffy goodness is hitting me right in the feels😭😭😭

Do not collect $200 by @mrslackles

My OG favourite series. I will talk about this till the cows come home, I will read it over and over again until the day I die. So fucking good. The plot, the characterisation, the angst, the fluff, it just has everything and I fucking love it.

Favourite snippet:

Her touch is so light that Rio shivers and his tongue darts out for a second, meeting two of her fingers, and it makes their eyes meet.

And the look she finds there, god, it’s indescribable – no words, there are no words. Yet she knows what it means. Nobody’s ever told me I’m a good kisser and nobody’s ever touched you like this.

She doesn’t say it aloud but it doesn’t matter, not really. They both know it.

And Beth doesn't know when she falls asleep, only that it's with her palm on his throat and her fingers splayed over his lips.

Lush life by @hereliesbb

Lush life is basically my comfort blanket. I have a bad day, I read it and I’m smiling again. Every time. Without fail. The fluffiest fucking shit I’ve ever read in my life, even the angst is fluffy. I love it so much, I cannot find the words. 

Favourite snippet:

“What?” she asked when she saw he was staring. She looked back in the mirror to make sure she didn’t have anything in her teeth.

“You’re beautiful,” he said and then huffed like he was making fun of himself. Beth felt her face flush and about a hundred thousand butterflies take flight inside of her.

Warm water by @inyoursheets

Angst, yearning, friends to lovers, slow burn AND THEY WERE ROOMMATES. Such a good read omg 😫

Favourite snippet:

She kisses him.

Elizabeth. Elizabeth kisses him.

He can’t move—can’t think, not with her up close, her scent overwhelming him, her soft body pressed into him—when she’s already pulling back, jerking to a halt.

And just like that, he’s done. Finished. Can no longer find it in him to keep it up, his carefully crafted indifference, the control he tried to grasp so eagerly. No point guarding it from her any longer, not with those wild, wide eyes peering up at him like he can give her something, here, now.

Good sport by fireinsideforfun

Again, phenominal characterisation. I love the way she portrays their vulnerability. It’s just so so so beautifully written. 

Also, the image of Rio drowning in a pair of ginormous pyjamas makes me feel some shit🤣

 Favourite snippet:

“You’re not going to go rotten on me, are you darlin’?” he quietly asks her.

The question takes her aback, because although his voice is gentle his eyes are speaking volumes, something dark and desolate brewing.

“No. Never,” she says to him and means it.

He scoffs. “How can you know?”

“Because we’ve already been there before,” she says, and she can tell he knows what she’s referring to. “I already tried to get rid of the king and I couldn’t do it. We’ve been through those motions together. It’s done.”

Milkshakes by @emilykolburn

Dad Rio vibes, Rio and babies. Milkshake meetcute. I cannot. Literally so adorable.

Favourite snippet:

Rio was looking her up and down, slowly taking in every inch of her that he could, and she noted that he had that twinkle in his eyes again. When his eyes eventually found hers, he tilted his head to the side a little, tongue running slowly across his bottom lip. The intensity in the eye contact alone made her want to shrink away. She wasn’t used to it, she realised, but the longer they looked into each other’s eyes, and the way the corner of his mouth slowly twitched up into a smirk, she found she liked it.

Irresistible by @wakeupflawless

Highschool au. Enemies to lovers. I eat that shit UP.

Before anyone could say anything, she grabbed the front of his shirt, yanking him down to her for a very public, very dirty kiss.

“Oh, shit,” She heard Pedro say.

For once in his life Rio must have been stunned, because he was frozen against her for a moment. He grabbed her hips, pulling her closer to him and deepening the kiss. The bystanders erupted, she heard hoots and hollers coming from the guys and exclamations of “Oh my God!” from the girls.

“Hey! That’s enough” Called the Vice Principal, “Everyone get to class!”

Beth broke their kiss, panting slightly and grinning ear to ear.

“What was that?” Rio asked, raising his eyebrows.

“So everyone knows I’m hittin’ it,” Beth replied, smirking, “And also to say sorry,”

Love despite by @itsbriology

Dad Rio strikes again. If Lindsay throws in one more big-hand-small-baby-ratio reference... i’m pretty sure my ovaries will explode inside of my body and I’ll die of internal bleeding 🙃🙃🙃

Favourite snippet:

The hiccups lasted longer than he thought, almost to the point he wondered if there wasn’t something else he could do for her. But they eventually slowed and so did her tears, and then he stopped and looked down at her little head full of soft brown hair that had landed on his chest and watched her eyes drift shut again from the pure exhaustion of the near traumatizing event.

“There ya go, sleepy head. See, I told ya.” He laughed down at her as he continued holding her and pushing the cart down the aisle. A little old lady stopped and took in the sight of them.

“Someone’s a good daddy,” She smiled up at him with Jane cozy in his arms and he stopped. The lady looked to be about eighty and probably weighed seventy pounds.

“Uhh, no… this ain’t…” He tried telling her but she interrupted.

“What an adorable little girl you’ve got there.”

The lady looked up at them grinning.“Thank you.” He smiled back, not knowing what else to say in that moment.

Criminology 101 by @sdktrs12

College au. Cars being destroyed. Fluffy shit. Idiots being idiots. LOVE ITTTTT

He moves one hand up to brush her hair out of her face. “Do you trust me?”

I do that’s the whole problem, she wants to scream. She finds herself nodding quietly instead.

“That’s good.” He leans down, presses his lips against her temple in a soft kiss that makes her heart skip a beat.

Beth closes her eyes as she leans into him, giving in and letting herself fall into the dark abyss that is his touch, his smell, his voice.

Shit.

She’s in so much trouble.

Both sides of the law by @joeyjoeylee

Slow burn. Y E A R N I N G. But they don’t even know they’re yearning. Taking the constant oneupmanship and translating it into a law school setting - genius. So so good.

Favourite snippet:

“Shouldn’t you be at the bar?” She really needed to let Gretchen know some of the staff had a distinct professionalism problem. If, or when, she was in charge of throwing the party next year, she’d have to make sure they did a better job of recruiting the help.

“Was just there, actually.” He wiggled his hand to show her the beer bottle he was holding. “But Gretch got on me ‘bout not having my nametag.”

She was confused and a little scandalized. Was he really drinking on the job? And…”Gretch”? He had to mean Gretchen? Granted, Beth barely knew her, but Gretchen hadn’t seemed like someone who would be on a first name basis with the staff. And why would he have a nametag? Nametags were for the students, and he was just a bartender…

Oh.

Oh no.

Everything seemed suddenly to be moving very slowly and she seemed to be watching it all unfold from outside her own body.

She watched him lean closer again to reach behind her and pick up the last nametag from the table.

She watched him pluck the Sharpie from her hand and use it to cross out “Christopher” then write “Rio” in big block letters that still managed to look messy.

Then she watched as he made a production of pinning the nametag just so to his lapel, mirroring her, exact and mocking, grinning down at her all the while.

Oh no.

A time to kill @sothischickshe

JUSTICE FOR MICK. And his shirt. Poor bby did not sign up for dealing with these two dumbasses and their dumbassery. Grumpy Rio pov is always a winner in my book. It’s comedy gold.

Favourite snippet:

Jesus, her hair is past lank. He sniffs. “You’re ripe. Go shower, man.”

Elizabeth grumbles incessantly until he agrees she can have coffee first, but he draws a line under a single cup, demanding she hurry.

Rio opens the windows wide as they allow. There’s a distinct scent of manure in the air, but it honestly might be preferable.

“That shirt needs washing too!” he yells from a safe nasal distance.

She literally punts the shirt at him from the bathroom, before slamming then locking the door. The handle vibrates for ages after.

He debates sourcing some tongs to handle the offending item with. When he can’t find any, considers setting fire to it instead. Surely Elizabeth can make herself a dress outta all the hair she incessantly moults over every inch or some shit.

Eventually he chucks it in for a wash with some other bits, holding his nose closed.

Elizabeth’s in the bathroom for fucking ages. He assumes it’s payback for pointing out she stunk, or whatever. But it ain’t cute.

He jiggles the handle, knocks on the door. There’s no response.

“Oi!” Rio shouts. “Hurry up, I gotta piss!” It’s not, strictly speaking, true. But. It could be. Hogging the bathroom’s just rude.

“Go away!” she squawks. Then, “Go outside!”

He keeps it up, and she mostly ignores him. Though when he insinuates she’s taking the world’s longest shit, she does straight up tell him to fuck off.

Tagging @purplemagic @wakeupflawless @00gangfriend00 @joeyjoeylee

[rockislandadultreads]

Likeable Characters: a variety of genres to read

Mermaids in Paradise by Lydia Millet

On the grounds of a Caribbean island resort, newlyweds Deb and Chip—our opinionated, skeptical narrator and her cheerful jock husband who's friendly to a fault—meet a marine biologist who says she's sighted mermaids in a coral reef. As the resort's "parent company" swoops in to corner the market on mythological creatures, the couple joins forces with other adventurous souls, including an ex–Navy SEAL with a love of explosives and a hipster Tokyo VJ, to save said mermaids from the "Venture of Marvels," which wants to turn their reef into a theme park. Mermaids in Paradise is Lydia Millet's funniest book yet, tempering the sharp satire of her early career with the empathy and subtlety of her more recent novels and short stories. This is an unforgettable, mesmerizing tale, darkly comic on the surface and illuminating in its depths.

The Marriage Clock by Zara Raheem

In Zara Raheem's fresh, funny, smart debut, a young, Muslim-American woman is given three months to find the right husband or else her traditional Indian parents will find one for her--a novel with a universal story that everyone can relate to about the challenges of falling in love. To Leila Abid's traditional Indian parents, finding a husband in their South Asian-Muslim American community is as easy as match, meet, marry. But for Leila, a marriage of arrangement clashes with her lifelong dreams of a Bollywood romance which has her convinced that real love happens before marriage, not the other way around. Finding the right husband was always part of her life-plan, but after 26 years of singledom, even Leila is starting to get nervous. And to make matters worse, her parents are panicking, the aunties are talking, and she's wondering, are her expectations just too high? So Leila decides it's time to stop dreaming and start dating. She makes a deal with her parents: they'll give her three months, until their 30th wedding anniversary, to find a husband on her own terms. But if she fails, they'll take over and arrange her marriage for her. With the stakes set, Leila succumbs to the impossible mission of satisfying her parents' expectations, while also fulfilling her own western ideals of love. But after a series of speed dates, blind dates, online dates and even ambush dates, the sparks just don't fly! And now, with the marriage clock ticking, and her 3-month deadline looming in the horizon, Leila must face the consequences of what might happen if she doesn't find "the one..."

By Book or By Crook by Eva Gates

Get bound up in murder in the first Lighthouse Library mystery! For ten years Lucy has enjoyed her job poring over rare tomes of literature for the Harvard Library, but she has not enjoyed the demands of her family’s social whorl or her sort-of-engagement to the staid son of her father’s law partner. But when her ten-year relationship implodes, Lucy realizes that the plot of her life is in need of a serious rewrite. Calling on her aunt Ellen, Lucy hopes that a little fun in the Outer Banks sun—and some confections from her cousin Josie’s bakery—will help clear her head. But her retreat quickly turns into an unexpected opportunity when Aunt Ellen gets her involved in the lighthouse library tucked away on Bodie Island. Lucy is thrilled to land a librarian job in her favorite place in the world. But when a priceless first edition Jane Austen novel is stolen and the chair of the library board is murdered, Lucy suddenly finds herself ensnared in a real-life mystery—and she’s not so sure there’s going to be a happy ending....

All Systems Red by Martha Wells

In a corporate-dominated spacefaring future, planetary missions must be approved and supplied by the Company. Exploratory teams are accompanied by Company-supplied security androids, for their own safety. But in a society where contracts are awarded to the lowest bidder, safety isn't a primary concern. On a distant planet, a team of scientists are conducting surface tests, shadowed by their Company-supplied 'droid—a self-aware SecUnit that has hacked its own governor module, and refers to itself (though never out loud) as "Murderbot." Scornful of humans, all it really wants is to be left alone long enough to figure out who it is. But when a neighboring mission goes dark, it's up to the scientists and their Murderbot to get to the truth.

[mcheang]

Lila the evil witch

Inspired by the Disney evil sorceresses: Mother Gothel, Ursula, the Evil Queen...what if Lila was an illusionist...but what was she after? The Disney villains were literally after a physical component: hair, voice, heart... the exception was Queen La of the Leopardman, she wanted Jane’s Husband

WARNING: THIS IS A DARK STORY...involving religion and exorcism.

The Daughter of Mrs Rossi was dead.

Inhabiting her youthful skin was an evil witch’s spirit named Lila. She even legally changed the name of the diplomat’s Daughter.

In the past; Lila had posed as a sweet Wiccan in an American village, living humbly. But she wanted more! (Inspired by Sarah Ravencroft from Scooby-Doo)

Lila was in truth a witch, and she longed to have the materialistic desires that everyone else desired. She was just willing to risk her soul in the process.

Lila cast love spells on the richest boy, causing him to obsess over her. She stole the beauty of the fairest maidens in the land to heighten her own. And those that opposed her soon found themselves sick.

It was the second issue that got the reverend concerned. His own daughter had suddenly gone from pretty to having burned skin.

He prayed in the Church for wisdom and guidance.

And perhaps it truly was holy intervention that caused a hypnotizing ray of moonlight to lead the reverend into the woods where he found Lila the Witch preparing a bath in a sunken pit of dark liquid. (Inspired from the book Another Faust where Belle took a painful chemical bath to maintain her beauty and allure.)

It was a repulsive bath. There was nothing so horrifying as the smell of blood, but there were crushed butterfly wings floating on it.

The reverend had seen enough. Lila was no innocent Wiccan; but a witch!

He wanted to expose her right there and then, but Lila had the male youth population on her side and was engaged to a very wealthy lad.

The reverend left the witch to her evil bath salts without alarming her to his presence.

So, the reverend gathered trusted adults for a secret plot to drive out the witch to the community.

He waited till the next moonlit night to lead them to the sunken pit and there they exposed Lila as a witch.

Lila snarled at them and raced out, her stinking naked body painted red. The men raced after her, determined not to let the evil escape.

They succeeded when one of their own threw a pitchfork at her torso. Lila lay dying in agony.

The villagers gathered around her in grim triumph.

But Lila had the last laugh, while she mocked them about their daughters’ disfigurements, she secretly cast a spell so her soul would not leave the earth. She knew hell awaited her for her crimes.

But being a disembodied soul is no picnic. And yet Lila knew currently, the judge’s Daughter was wasting away in bed from her curses.

Lila waited until the girl’s soul had passed on, before moving in on the still warm body.

When the judge returned from the witch hunt, he was jubilant that his Daughter had been cured.

Lila played her role carefully, lest she arouse suspicion again. She waited years before deciding to move to another town. By this time, Lila’s stolen body was middle-aged. She kept her eyes out for young blood.

And so it went on, Lila looked for a body with a wonderful lifestyle for her to steal. With her acting skills, it was a breeze. The few who noticed were silenced.

Of course, there were the other magical folk who realized what she was. The goody kind sought to exorcise her. They never succeeded.

One day, she came across a diplomat’s Daughter. She had a good life. A sufficient allowance, fabulous travels around the world, and little parent monitoring. She became Lila’s next victim.

After a couple of countries later, she legally changed her name.

Then Mrs Rossi announced they were moving to Paris. Lila initially had some concerns. The Miraculous were ancient relics lost to time. But given Hawkmoth’s failures and the heroes’ inexperience, Lila suspected they were not well versed in identifying magical creatures.

She studied her talented new class, looking for possible new victims. Living a life of travel was fun and all, but it wasn’t fully luxurious.

Obviously those with artistic talent like Marinette, Nathaniël and Kitty Section were out.

To be fair, the only viable candidate was Chloe. The girl was served hand and foot and got to be mean! That sounded ideal to Lila.

But, with Hawkmoth around, Lila suspected the mayor would get akumatized trying to cure her. Or even Sabrina.

Ugh, she’ll have to wait till he is busted then. What a bummer. Who knows how long that will take?

In the meantime, Lila might as well have some fun. Her gullible classmates were her new servants. But Adrien and Marinette kept their distance.

You see, upon first sight, the kwamis saw her for what she really was and warned their holders to be cautious. Thankfully they were strong enough to counter whatever magic tricks Lila could come up with.

Lila didn’t do that though, she relied on her lying talents.

As a result, Marinette never got the chance to spy on Adrien once Tikki strongly told her to not raise the liar’s suspicions.

Also, Plagg thoroughly was alarmed by this Lila girl and warned Adrien to keep his distance while they were separated in the library, and don’t let her take anything that belonged to him. As a result, the book is safe. And Lila doesn’t have a chance to be akumatized.

Ladybug and Chat Noir discussed how to exorcise her. It would take joint efforts but the original soul inhabiting Lila’s body was gone. After the exorcisement, the body would be a corpse.

The action itself was simple, Lila was physically no match for them. All Ladybug had to wind her magical yo-yo string around her and let its magic nullify Lila’s own. (Tikki’s magic can’t do that for Nooroo’s akumas) then all Chat had to do was literally push her with his baton.

Plagg’s power would destroy whatever was anchoring Lila’s soul and force her out.

But how to go about it? In public? In private? How do they convince Mrs Rossi her real Daughter is dead and an evil spirit now possesses her body?

No, the real daughter of Mrs Rossi deserves to be given closure. Her Mother should be mourning for her real daughter, not the Lila ghost!

Ladybug and Chat Noir brought in Alya’s help for this, as well as tell her Ladybug is so not BFFs with Lila!

Lucky charm: an actual recent video of the real Miss Rossi at the zoo for her birthday. Apparently she has an intense fear of snakes.

Ladybug and Chat Noir visit Mrs Rossi at work and ask to speak with her in private. Mrs Rossi is of course, disbelieving, until Ladybug suggests they use the snake test. If Lila acts as Mrs Rossi expects her to, they won’t perform exorcism. But if she does not, Mrs Rossi will let them go through with it.

Mrs Rossi is still skeptical about this bargain before Ladybug points out that with all the akumas and superpowers, how can she doubt what was happening? Even New York has superheroes!

Mrs Rossi admits she doesn’t want to face the truth that her Daughter has been dead all this time and she never even noticed.

Chat consoles her that she can at least give her real Daughter justice.

Alya and Marinette organize a class field trip to the zoo.

Mrs Rossi disguises herself as a zoo attendant.

Lila is paired with Alya to study the snake exhibit. Lila shows no apprehension whatsoever.

At the dim, empty snake exhibit, Ladybug and Chat Noir act. Lila shrieks and demands to know their reason behind this. She pleads for Alya to intervene but Alya just stands back, with the zoo attendant. Both watching silently as Chat Noir gently pushes her with his baton.

Lila’s body collapses. And a visible spirit manifests, still trapped by the yo-yo.

The spirit of Lila the witch is no longer youthful, and they finally see what her real form looks like. An ancient, withered hag snarling and screeching in hatred and agony.

Mrs Rossi condemns Lila for killing her Daughter.

Lila spits at her. “What can I say? A Daughter with little to none parental attention? She was such easy bait! I’ve been here for years and you never noticed.”

Mrs Rossi flinched at the accusation.

Alya stepped forward. “And what about Marinette? Were you going to target her too?”

Lila laughed. “I target those with envy-inducing lifestyles. Marinette may have the connections but she’s no Chloe. I was waiting till Hawkmoth was defeated before I took care of her. Marinette though, was open game. I don’t tolerate people who call me a liar.”

Chat: you are a liar.

Lila glares hatefully at the heroes. “You won’t win. I’ll be back, and when I do, I’ll kill everyone you love.”

Chat: yeah, I don’t think so.

He plunges his baton through her spirit, into the earth. The baton channels the evil spirit away from the earth. In the afterlife, there are 2 paths. Lila obviously has shown no repentance...her destination is obvious.

Back at the zoo, Mrs Rossi weeps for her Daughter. The heroes assure her that Lila is gone and won’t return. Alya is preparing to tell her class the news. They decided to keep this matter private. Mrs Rossi isn’t ready for this to be public.

The fake story: Lila suffered a sudden stroke.

The class wants to hold a funeral but Mrs Rossi insists on going back home immediately. She can’t stand the thought of the class mourning for that horrible ghost. They never knew her real Daughter.

Oh, and btw, Plagg finally convinced Adrien to take pictures of the book and send the information to the Guardian.

[bellemorte180]

PLOT BUNNY

Okay, so forewarning, not writing this one. The last time I had a plot bunny in morphed into “Just Another Fairytale”. This is up for grabs if anyone wants it. 

So, loosely based off of Jane the Virgin. 

Caroline, who is about 25 or so, goes into the doctors for a regular pap smear. She either just broke up with her boyfriend, (Tyler or Stefan, dealers choice) and hasn’t been sexually active in a long while. Like, months maybe? ANYWAY, her doctor just discovered that her husband cheated on her and was distracted. 

Her doctor, who sucks at her job, mixes up her patient file with Aurora Mikaelson. Instead of doing a pap smear, she artificially inseminates Caroline with Klaus Mikaelson’s sperm. Klaus is a famous artist and Caroline has been a fan of his work of YEARS. 

That night, Aurora goes home to tell Klaus what she had done. HOWEVER, Klaus had no idea that Aurora took his sperm to the clinic (or even had his sperm in the first place). While she was trying to get herself pregnant, he was at the lawyers office getting divorce papers drafted. Aurora was trying to get pregnant to force Klaus to stay because she is nuts.

Klaus tells her he still wants a divorce but will be involved in his child’s life. He starts thinking of all the ways he could take Aurora for custody and stop the lunacy that she was sure to inflict upon the child.

They go to the doctor’s appointment where they are told they accidentally impregnated the wrong woman. Caroline is also receiving the same news after feeling ill for a couple of weeks. Aurora flips her shit and is physically removed from the doctors office. Caroline, who has been feeling sick does not even think she is pregnant. The concept does not cross her mind at all.

Klaus tracks down Caroline when he gets her name and tell her everything. She, obviously, does not believe him and takes several pregnancy tests. When she cannot deny it, she demands to know how he knew she was pregnant. 

Klaus is immediately infatuated with her and tells her that he wants to keep the baby. Caroline, who has no idea what she is doing finds herself carrying the baby of an artist whose work she loves and agrees. However, Klaus assures her that his divorce was going to be quick and painless.

It’s not. Aurora is furious and out for blood. She tries to say that Klaus cheated on her and got Caroline pregnant. Which, is not what happened but seeing that Caroline IS pregnant with Klaus’s baby, it is hard to refute and his reputation takes a dive.

Aurora then tries to get Caroline to miscarry by attacking her. However, Caroline being the daughter of a sheriff, knows how to defend herself and does more harm to Aurora. Aurora is arrested and charged with harassment. Both Caroline and Klaus are able to get a restraining order against her. 

Klaus is TERRIFIED when he learns that Aurora went after Caroline. Over the months of her pregnancy, he has really begun to develop feelings for Caroline and visa versa, but neither were willing to say anything. When she is in her late stage of her pregnancy, they decided to try and give a relationship ago, especially since Aurora is out of the picture. 

Caroline, who was having issues with her apartment, moves in with Klaus. Everyone believes that they were having an affair so there was no point in trying to hide it at this point and they want their child to have one home. 

The art community gets wind that Aurora tried to attack Caroline and the whole mess is revealed wit the doctor who wrongfully inseminated Caroline is sued for malpractice by someone else, for a similar incident. Klaus’s name is in the clear just in time for Caroline to go into labor.

They deliver a healthy baby girl with blonde hair and blue eyes. 

[orionsangel86]

“I Think It’s Time For Me To Move On”

...And Other Things That Have Destroyed Me This Weekend...

So there is this common trope within love stories which generally happens at the end of the second act in which everything goes wrong and we all think that the lovers are doomed to failure. Its pretty much standard in every Jane Austen novel, every romantic film every made, every single bloody love story. Go ahead, name one. I guarantee you the break up moment is there.

Within the epic love story of Dean and Cas, there have been many break up moments, and all have had their emotionally devastating impact on the relationship and the show...

But THIS was a different level. 

(For a nice summary of Destiel break up moments and understanding of this trope, @tinkdw​ wrote about it here.)

I didn’t think that there would be another moment within Dean and Cas’s relationship that could hit me this hard. The mixtape in 12x19, the wrapping of Cas’s body in 13x01, and the return of Cas in 13x05 are moments that I consider to be the very top of the scale in making this pairing undeniably romantic. Moments that pushed it beyond a platonic interpretation. These three moments have been the things I cling to when the show has otherwise made me doubt any conclusion to the DeanCas story, and since there hasn’t been another one of those moments since 13x05, until now I have been somewhat nervous that the story was dropped, or being forced back behind a platonic screen. 

15x03 has ripped that screen away. 

Emotional meta under cut...

This entire episode was an emotion fuelled dramatic roller-coaster that killed off three characters including our beloved witch queen in a scene that almost stole the show and practically canonised the SamWitch ship. Rowena’s death should have been by far the most torturous moment for viewers to endure, and it was extremely torturous and had me sobbing on a plane 3 hours into a 7 hour flight. That incredibly heartfelt moment between Sam and Rowena will probably go down as one of the top tear-jerking moments on this show. It was tragic in the best way - the way Supernatural is famous for.

But lets not gloss over the fact that in an episode where THAT should have been the climax, where THAT should have been the emotional highlight and end point, instead we get a further MORE dramatic stand off between Dean and Cas that pulled focus and ripped all of our hearts out just as violently as poor Ketch in the first act (a very clever and smug piece of meta foreshadowing there Mr Berens).

On a meta level, this is HUGE as a writing choice because they MUST know how this looks. This was the climax of the third episode of the finale season. The way Supernatural has always structured itself since Carver era is that the first three mytharc episodes of each season establish the direction of the story and set the foundations for the character level focal points and dramatic key notes to come. 

That the writers have chosen to end the foundation episodes with a DeanCas break up moment that was more dramatic than a Spanish Telenovela has just stunned me and left me reeling because I just can’t see how else this can go. This break up scene absolutely DEMANDS a huge reconciliation of the sort that will be part of the A plot of the season - the FINAL SEASON. Guys. Part of the reason I have been so quiet and so disillusioned with the show during late season 13 and season 14 was because they pushed any Destiel plot into non existent territory - it became kinda irrelevant and Dean and Cas just acted like friends (homoerotic friends yes, and sometimes like an old married couple, but it was mostly played as an afterthought imo), so for this to suddenly be brought to the forefront of the emotional story again is excellent news for us. 

The thing is, like with those huge moments I listed above, the break up scene is basically undeniably romantic when you break it down to its components:

1. It’s only Dean and Cas. 

Once again we have another scene of high stake emotions that excludes Sam. In a platonic reading of the show, it makes zero sense for there to be such a hugely disjointed relationship between Cas and Dean and Cas and Sam given he has known them both for so long now that if they were all “just friends” then surely Sam would also feel the impact of Cas’s choices as heavily as Dean. In a platonic reading, Dean comes across as an asshole, Sam comes across as being weirdly uncaring about his friend of 10 years, and Cas comes across as not even bothering to get Sam’s opinion before leaving. A romantic reading makes sense because quite literally THIS IS A ROMANTIC BREAK UP.

2. The words spoken. 

“Well I don’t think there is anything left to say.”

“I think it’s time for me to move on”

From Cas’s perspective at least, name one time in a piece of media where such language has been used for a platonic breakup sincerely? There have been heartfelt break up songs that use these exact words. (I should know I’ve spent the last 24 hours listening to them all).

That last line in particular is so heavy. It’s the last line of the episode and nothing about it is platonic. This is relationship terminology my dudes. “I need to move on, and get over you.” This is Cas’s bloody Adele song. My heart breaks for him, but if I was his sassy and fabulous best girlfriend right now I’d be sitting him down, sipping a cocktail, flipping my hair and telling him “Babe, you’re too good for him. Good Riddance. Let’s go out, have some cocktails, something pink and fruity. No dive bars for us darling. I’ll take you to Heaven... the fun one in London.”

In all seriousness though, from Cas’s perspective, this was him admitting defeat and giving up the fight for love. How anyone can possibly say Cas isn’t in love with Dean after this, well I just don’t know what show you are watching. This is the face of a heartbroken man who has just accepted that his love is unrequited. 

3. The many faces of Dean Winchester

On the other end of the scale, Dean was mostly silent after his poisonous words “And why does that something always seem to be you?”

Forgive the terrible gif quality I’ve no time for fancy gif work!

Look at his face here. He knows what he said was fucked up and he immediately regrets it. The way he swallows around that regret and then turns away.

and after Cas says that devastating final line and walks away? We get THIS reaction from him:

The jaw clench as he looks down. The sorrow on his face as he realises he has well and truly fucked this up. LOOK

Finally, he looks up, makes himself look up and watch Cas leave. If that isn’t the face of a broken man I dunno what to tell you. Anyone who thinks Dean is totally heartless and uncaring right now needs to reassess because this is NOT the face of someone uncaring. This is the face of someone who has just lost everything. Again. 

4. The FUCKING MUSIC

Seriously. The sweeping heavy drama of the low strings that come in right after Dean says that horrid line, that carry the weight of the look of horror and heartbreak on Cas’s face as they amplify the emotion there. As they blend seamlessly into the slow and subtle version of the Winchester family theme behind Cas’s heartbreaking speech and Dean’s stubborn stoic face hiding a multitude of emotion, until the violin dominates as Cas says “I think it’s time for me to move on” and the Winchester Theme swells to its climax, ripping all our hearts out just like poor Ketch as Dean watches Cas walk out of his life surrounded by darkness. 

I MEAN.

A friend on Twitter reminded us all of this point about the importance of this theme via @justanotheridijiton​ here which is essentially:

“The Winchester theme is not simply an aural marker to let the audience know when and how Sam and Dean love each other (any Supernatural fan knows that is the baseline of their relationship), but to provide narrative information, especially when the image and dialogue are incomplete or inconsistent with the true situation...  Seasoned fans will recognize the theme and its history of being paired with images indicating deep emotional bonding and a desire to do the right thing by the Winchester code. Here we trust our ears over our eyes to reveal the truth.”

So here is yet another key indicator that any surface read that this is actually an ending between Dean and Cas and that Dean really is just an angry asshole is utter bullshit. 

Honestly, this was PAINFUL, but it was painful in the best way. It was 13x01 levels of pain, but this time it was Cas choosing to walk away which makes all the difference. Dean’s greatest fear isn’t his loved ones dying on him after all, but of his loved ones choosing to leave him. This was exactly the kick up the ass Dean needs in order to win Cas back, classic love trope style. 

Hence my excitement at what is to come. Yes we won’t see Cas again until 15x06, but in the meantime I fully expect a good helping of angst and wallowing from a depressed Dean who has to deal with the fact that he has just lost the love of his life and it is all his fault. That he just pushed away the one person who promised they would always stay by his side. That has got to hurt. 

So yeah, this episode emotionally destroyed me, and I’ve only really covered the primary reason, let alone all my feels over SamWitch, Rowena’s death, Belphegor’s taunting of Cas over his deepest fears and then having to suffer through smiting a creature wearing the face of his son until his body was nothing but a burnt corpse... I wonder if Bobo had a bet going in the office over how much he could hurt us all? He was certainly enjoying scrolling through the Supernatural tag on Twitter and liking everyone’s reaction tweets including some brilliant Destiel related ones. I do love Bobo. Our Angst Goblin King. 

If anyone had asked me a few weeks ago what my thoughts were on the chances of getting explicit canon Destiel by series end, I would have said somewhere in the realms of 30-40%, considering it a battle of wills between DabbBerens and CW studio execs who I still feel are against it in general. I would have considered everything that happened after 13x06 as the writers getting a big NO on Destiel from the network and therefore having to pull back on any Destiel related plot points (purely my own speculation on BTS matters of course).

Now I am wondering if Dabb kept fighting the network? If he managed to wear them down into begrudging acceptance? I’m currently up to around an 80% chance of textual canon DeanCas if we continue on this path. If Dean is clearly shown to be mourning and hating himself over Cas next episode, and if this DeanCas dramatic plot line continues to be a focal point of the emotional story arcs... well...

I’m side eyeing 15x07 a lot right now. Only in my wildest dreams would I think that they might actually introduce an old boyfriend for Dean in a “coming out” episode, but the placement, timing, and potential is all there and I’m kind of once again donning the clown mask because I’m just in awe at everything that they are doing. I guess we’ll find out soon enough. In the meantime, I’m gonna paint my face in red and white and wear my rainbow wig and listen to break up songs on Spotify whilst trying to shove my heart back into my chest where Bobo Beren’s gleefully ripped it out with his hands like the demonic angst goblin he is. Wish me luck, I’m not sure I’m gonna get through this season with my emotions intact.

[justfandomwritings]

Oh my goshhh!!! Loyalty is frigging amazing!!!! That fic is so beautiful.. I just... there's no words, man. What happens next? How do they plot? Does he kill Odin and Thor? Can you please tag me when you write the spin off (not to be rude but how long will that take? I am just soooo excited) ❤❤

Gather round children! I am not going to write any story of how Loki’s story matches up with the MCU, and while the sequel I’ve plotted will feature bits of this, it will really only hint at what happened to Loki. So, because I think everyone deserves an explanation, here is how Loyalty!Loki progressed through the movies.

Loyalty post-story explanation:

The plot continues up to Thor as you’d imagine.

Brilliant actor that he would be, Loki pretends to be absolutely fine with all slights and fakes that he has gotten over his lost love. Because no one in his family pays attention to him, no one at court notices anything is wrong with Loki or that it’s odd that he got over losing his soulmate so quickly. 

Loki spends more and more time in the lower districts of Asgard, doing everything in his power to support the people and keep (Y/n)’s memory alive.

The people loved her, were loyal to her, and still are. Naturally, Loki receives much of this loyalty through his relationship with (Y/n) and more importantly through his insistence on keeping her memory alive.

All the while, Loki is plotting Thor and Odin’s demise. He knows he wants it to be at the hands of the Frost Giants who killed (Y/n), and it’s Narfi who gives him the chance.

Now on the Council for himself, Narfi is ordered to plan Thor’s coronation, and he and Loki plan out how the Frost Giants might ruin his big day.

They use (Y/n)’s old family home for their preparations. Most nobles consider the outer rim of fishers near (Y/n)’s childhood to be insignificant. So as long as Heimdall doesn’t watch Loki enter the house or know he’s going there, no one cares to look at what’s happening in (Y/n)’s old room.

Thor movie

On the day of the coronation, Loki has doubts. He knows this is not what (Y/n) would want him to become, and he questions whether they should follow through.

Then, one last time, Thor slights him before the coronation by talking about Loki’s conquests as though they were his own and by mentioning the attack by the Frost Giants as if it were a success even though (Y/n) died. 

(Insert the deleted scene of Thor and Loki together waiting to enter the throne room)

Loki makes up his mind then and there that Thor must lose everything, as he once did.

The Frost Giants come and Thor shows his true colors.

He demands a raid on Jotunheim, and though Loki publicly denies it, he is seething inside. 

Thor demanded justice for a stupid ceremony and thought that was worthy of Laufey’s head, but Laufey killing (Y/n) wasn’t even worth a second thought to Thor.

 After Jotunheim, even Odin can’t deny what Thor has done, and Loki relishes watching Thor cast away from everything he’s ever known.

In the vaults beneath Asgard, Loki argues with Odin on the steps only for Odin to tell him the reason Frost Giant’s don’t affect him is because he is one.

Loki watches Odin collapse and the guards take him away, leaving Loki to think.

Loki is horrified. This whole time he’s been on a quest of vengeance against the Frost Giants, and he is one of the monsters who killed (Y/n). 

He determines that his best plan would be to kill them all, take Thor and Odin’s life himself. 

He sends the Destroyer for Thor and is only incensed more when Thor appeals to him for mercy for Midgard. After everything, Thor still doesn’t understand why Loki is in a rage. 

The fight happens as it did, and Thor destroys the Bifrost to save whatever is left of Jotunheim.

Odin is holding Thor who is holding the spear with Loki. 

Loki: “Vengeance, that’s all I wanted for her, but you wouldn’t even give her dignity.” 

Thor looks confused for a moment before he realizes who Loki’s talking about.

Odin just stares on emotionless as always. 

Loki: “We’ll see.” 

Loki falls.

Between movies

Loki falls to Thanos.

Loki is worried over what Thanos’ plans to do, to destroy half the known universe. 

He wouldn’t mind watching half of Asgard burn or all of Jotunheim or even parts of Midgard which Thor had come to care about, but he knows that isn’t what (Y/n) would have wanted, that many innocents would die in the crossfire, that some of those may even be his own, his real, family.

Using the mind stone, Thanos finds the rage and anger within Loki, and there’s a great deal of it after millennia of being slighted by his father and brother and pitied by his mother, and after a century of suffering the loss of the only person he ever loved. 

Thanos exploits this and draws it out, sending the mind-controlled Loki to Earth to retrieve the Tesseract for him. 

Avengers movie

Everything happens as made, save that one conversation between Thor and Loki.

Thor: “I thought you dead.”

Loki: “Did you mourn?”

Thor: “We all did. Our father...” 

Loki: “Your father. He did tell you my true parentage did he not?”

Thor: “We were raised together, we played together, we fought together. Do you remember none of that?”

Loki: “I remember a shadow, living in the shade of your greatness. You speak of togetherness because every time you needed me I was there, but every time I needed you I was alone. I remember studying magic, alone. I remember defending myself against the Warriors Three, alone. I remember standing up to Father, alone. I remember being punished for our tricks, alone.”

Loki: “I was alone until (Y/n) came, and then you took her from me. You made me alone again. Not just for being the cause of her death, but for not caring that you caused it at all. I was back where I began. I mourned her, alone. And when I finally came out of my chambers, I sat, alone, robbed of the only real family I ever knew. And you’re surprised that after millennia of suffering your destruction, I plotted vengeance alone?”

Thor: The Dark World

Loki faces Odin’s punishment for Midgard alone.

He rots in the dungeon until someone tells him Frigga has been killed.

Loki wants to hate her like he hates the rest of them. She was never a good mother. She clearly preferred Thor and pitied Loki. She let Odin run rampant over Asgard and his sons, and she never once defended Loki. 

But Loki can’t bring himself to hate her because: for one at least she tried, but more importantly she gave him (Y/n).

Loki goes with Thor because if he can’t avenge (Y/n) then at least he can avenge his mother. 

He watches Thor’s love for Jane and can’t decide if he despises it or not. He wants desperately, to watch Thor suffer; but he isn’t sure if that is how. His pain is the sort of pain he wouldn’t wish on his worst enemy, and his worst enemy was his brother. 

In the ship, they talk about it.

Loki: “The only woman who’s love you prize will be snatched from you.”

Thor: “And will that satisfy you brother?” 

Loki: “No, but perhaps in a few years, when I get to watch you become me; perhaps that will satisfy me.”

Thor: “This was all about (Y/n)?”

Loki: “That feeling you have for Jane, that love; imagine if it were the only love you’d ever felt. Imagine if Odin despised you and Mother ignored your suffering. Imagine if I spent my life beating you into submission. Imagine if the Warriors Three and all your friends didn’t care about you. And imagine if the Nine Realms never noticed you existed. Imagine the only person you love being the only person who loved you, then imagine my arrogance, after years of cruelty and incompetence, finally ripped it away.” 

Loki retreats and sits back down. Loki: “It was always about her. It will always be about her.” 

Between Movies

Loki avenges his mother and fakes his own death to rule Asgard as the King they always deserved. 

He puts the people first, shares his wealth and power, he rules with a firm, justice hand and doesn’t play favorites like his father.

The people all begin to realize that it isn’t Odin, that Loki has replaced him, when Loki orders a giant statue to  his soulmate built in front of his extension to the palace.

No one says anything. They prefer this happy peaceful life Loki’s given them. It’s the life Frigga promised they would get with soulmates, but the life Odin was too warlike to let anyone actually have.

Thor: The Dark World

The movies plot passes pretty much the same, but Loki’s character is more in keeping with his development and style. It isn’t the sort of sniveling, whiny, weak creation Taika came up with.

Loki comes at the end of the movie, not to help Thor, but because he realized Thor was going to have it out with Hel on Asgard and put the people in grave danger, including his real family.

He arrives and sees Delling and Dysis helping their daughters and grandchildren onto the ship he brought.

Loki: “Where are the others?”

Delling, heartbroken: “Gone. They died with the army.”

Loki, discouraged: “And Narfi?”

Delling just shakes his head.

Loki roars out into the battle and ends up fighting side by side with Thor and the Valkyrie.

As he brings about Ragnarok, Loki takes the Tesseract. He knows that even the blast of Ragnarok won’t destroy the Space Gem, and he can’t very well leave it floating in space for Thanos to just casually pick up, so he determines to find somewhere to hide it forever. 

As the battle rages on between Surtur and Hel, Loki heads for the Royal Family’s tomb and takes (Y/n)’s crypt, using the Tesseract to port it onto the ship. Everything else is going to go up in flames, and Loki refuses to let that be her legacy. 

The end of the movie, onboard the ship, Thor throws a thing at Loki to prove he isn’t there. 

Loki catches it. Loki: “I’m here, brother.” 

Loki turns and leaves the room, finding (Y/n)’s family and sitting with them. He’s given up vengeance on Thor because he’s finally realized (Y/n) died to save his brother, not so Loki could kill him later. But he knows now that this is his real family. 

Thor is off to the side, watching them. This time he’s the one standing alone. 

Seeing their interactions, their mourning Narfi and his brothers, their talking with Loki, Thor realizes that Loki was right. They never really treated him like family

He realizes that Odin, with his help, robbed Loki of everything. A normal family, a happy life, his one true love. They even took the family he made for himself. 

Thor decides to leave Loki in peace with his family and leave on his own. 

Avengers: Infinity War

Loki watches Thanos ready to kill Thor and realizes what Thanos means by half. He’s going to kill half of each group, and that means half of the sons of Odin.

Loki knows that Thor with his Avengers stands a better chance than Loki, and if Thor dies Thanos may well succeed. 

More importantly to Loki, if Thor dies, then (Y/n) died in vain.

Loki rushes Thanos and dies so that he is the half of the sons of Odin that Thanos kills. He dies for Thor the same way (Y/n) did.

The rest of the movie happens.

Avengers: Endgame

Finally understanding what Loki felt, finally understanding what it’s like to lose everything, Thor picks up Loki’s quest for vengeance and takes off Thanos’ head.

Then, with no real purpose, Thor mourns, alone, like his brother did.

Movie goes as planned mostly.

When Hulk snaps, he doesn’t just bring back the half of humanity that Thanos snapped out of existence. Thanos had been roaming the galaxy slaughtering half of every inhabited world he encountered, and Hulk (knowing this from watching on the ship) thinks of them too and brings back the millions who died before the snap.

Asgard’s army was killed by Hel before Thanos ever touched them, but Loki is brought back in space and roars into battle to help protect his family. 

When the war is finally won, Loki watches Cap disassemble the infinity gauntlet with envy.

The rest of the Avengers are wary that he will try to steal it, but Thor knows what he’s thinking.

Thor: “Perhaps the soul stone might bring her back.”

Loki: “Let her rest brother. I have kept her alive through death for far too long. She deserves peace.” 

Loki leaves. No one knows where he’s gone, and no one ever sees him again.

Loki returns to the wreckage, retrieves (Y/n)’s crypt and disappears forever. 

I plotted this out when I plotted out the series, because I believe you have to know the whole story to write a story well. 

But as you can see, there are huge chunks where the story just overlaps with the movies, so I didn’t think it would make for very good reading.

[autumnblogs]

Day 50: Trickster Shenanigans

Getting an early start today, because I want to do some catch-up for the last few missed days, so we’ll see if I can get to the end of Disc 2 today.

https://homestuck.com/story/5714

So if we view a lot of the beats in the Alpha Kids’ story as corresponding to beats in the Beta Kids’ story, and Jane as a character who is emotionally parallel to Rose in a lot of ways, Trickster Mode basically represents the same emotional beat for her as Grimdark Mode did for Rose. Jane is at her emotional nadir here, thinking that her Dad is dead, and alienated from all of her friends.

More after the break.

https://homestuck.com/story/5730

I think what is so unsettling about the Tricksters is the way in which all of their actual personality traits are overridden - they’re just happy. They make us question the nature of happiness in general, because their happiness is artificial, it overshadows their actual selves - all of the things about them that make them who they are - and makes them bombastically enthusiastic about things as they are, while giving them borderline absolute power to warp reality and give them something TO be happy about.

Their recovery from trickster mode, and Andrew’s narration makes it clear that Trickster Mode is not good for humans, because like a sugar rush, it just provides temporary relief from the genuine emotional problems that the literal material problems of Sburb parallel. Solving the material problems is not a proxy for solving the emotional problems, and progressing through the plot at hyperspeed without doing any of the actual emotional work ultimately leaves the kids’ development stunted, and unprepared for what comes next.

The happiness is fake - the euphoria is a real sensation that they’re experiencing, but it’s provoked externally, it’s a cheat. This whole episode has tones of substance abuse, but I think that what it’s ultimately about on the whole is wish fulfillment as a coping mechanism, as the Alpha Kids ignore their actual problems and escape into a fantasy where they just don’t have any.

https://homestuck.com/story/5757

Dirk’s response to all these shenanigans is kind of... complicated. Like, he’s right that this isn’t solving anything, but his reaction is less about actually wanting to solve his problems in a constructive way, and more I think that Dirk doesn’t want to not be miserable. Maybe on an intellectual level, he gives assent to the fact that it would be good to make progress and change as a person, but emotionally, Dirk can’t let go of the idea of himself as a static person who just is a certain way, and has to be who he is. Changing would mean ceasing to exist. The person who is Dirk is miserable, but he’s too terrified to be anything else.

https://homestuck.com/story/5759

Even as miserable as all this is, it’s kind of cathartic to see Dirk break free from his own aloofness and experience some kind of emotion, even if it’s just anger. This is one of those times where I’m not actually entirely clear how I feel about a story development.

On the one hand, Dirk’s emotions about the whole situation are real, and valid, but like... I’m not sure if he’s right to make those emotional demands of Jake. And I’m pretty sure he’s not. By all accounts, Dirk has been a possessive, physically abusive boyfriend to Jake, if we take into account the fact that their rough-housing is pretty one-sided if the Brobot’s conduct is anything to help us understand.

But I still feel sympathetic toward Dirk, and I guess what makes me feel that way is that he’s being emotionally honest for once in his life, and the emotion that he’s being honest about is pain. I have a hard time not feeling pity for people who are in pain, even if that pain is largely self-inflicted.

https://homestuck.com/story/5778

The language here very directly compares the trickster situation to the Grimdark situation, so I guess I was either remembering that, or just spot on.

https://homestuck.com/5796

Dirk and Jane are both over Jake at this point, and there’s an extent to which they are both legitimately over him, and for good reason. Even as a friend, Jake’s not really willing to do any emotional labor whatsoever.

On the other hand, I think they both realize, to some extent, that they’ve been making unfair emotional demands of Jake, based on the chagrin that they feel in terms of the way they’ve been behaving toward him.

https://homestuck.com/5798

Yup. That is exactly what they’re feeling.

I think the answer to who is in the wrong is this situation is; pretty much everyone.

Roxy probably the least; she is luckily pretty divorced from these emotional shenanigans. I’m sure we could find something to blame Roxy for, but I don’t really feel like it - she’s only a part of this love triangle tangentially, and the main thing that she’s been doing is going against her nature as a Rogue of Void by keeping everyone’s secrets from each other.

They dragged her into it to, and made her a part of it. So maybe if we can blame Roxy for anything, it’s not speaking out about how terrible and unhealthy this whole situation is before things got this bad, after she helped push Jake into a relationship with one of her other best friends? But even that feels like a stretch.

https://homestuck.com/5802

Ah yup, there we go, not only did Roxy fall off the wagon, she started sexually harassing Dirk again.

There’s what I was missing. I was so busy focusing on the Jake English Love Triangle that I forgot about that.

While it should be pretty obvious without stating it, this little sequence is just another continuation and exploration of the theme of alienation that the whole comic is about - the impossibility of human unmediated communication because of the way that exposing our true selves makes us vulnerable to pain.

The emotional effort they have to make to talk to each other is too great.

They are not strong enough.

https://homestuck.com/5819

I wish I had more to say commentary-ways, but everyone here is being pretty emotionally honest! There’s not a lot of motive-sensing necessary when everyone is just laying their cards on the table.

https://homestuck.com/5858

Parallel to the way all of the other kids so far have had their ascension to Godhood arranged, nefarious actors intercede to kill them without any action on their part; and the way that Caliborn arranges for this through Lil Cal, juxtaposed with the imagery of the Trickster Lollipop in his eyes suggests to me that if we fully decode this sequence of events for meaning, it’s an exposition on the theme we got the first time around we were dealing with the God Tiers;

We might call the God Tier principle this; There is no spiritual significance to seeking, acquiring, or having power; it is as easy or easier for the spiritually deaf and blind to acquire power as it is for the awakened.

And we might call the Trickster Corollary this; Wish fulfillment fantasy is the attempt to unify spiritual significance with the power of action, and is false storytelling.

https://homestuck.com/story/5926

I think that this is actually a pretty fine plae to stop. I really powered through around 200 pages without having a whole lot to say, in no small part because the Trickster “arc” if it can be called that really stops being so cagey and ironic for a while to actually just be refreshingly emotional candid. There’s a bit to unpack from the conversations that the characters have with one another, but the long and short of this fallout is that the characters have all failed to not only be supportive of each other, but to even be supportive of themselves.

The Alpha Kids can’t figure out how to love each other, because they don’t love themselves.

Cam signing off early! I might try to do this stuff earlier in the day more like this, since I’m feeling mentally invigorated and ready for work now at the end of my session, instead of worn out from trying to juggle work and hobbies.

For now, Cam signing off, Alive, and with a Cat in my lap.