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hongism · 4 years ago

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mists of celeste ➻ 33

➻ pairing: ??? x fem reader ➻ genre: space au, pirate au, space pirate!ateez, angst, smut ➻ Word Count: 10.5k ➻ Rating: M ➻ Warnings: language, violence, guns and weaponry, blood, future warnings tba ➻ summary: Sneaking aboard the ship of a renowned space pirate may not have been the best idea, but you’ll have to make do with what fate has handed to you

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✧✧✧ act four ➻ part eight

Five people in the room. Dark walls, wood panels laid over bricks at haphazard and awkward angles, quiet voices muttering off to the side, three cots smashed together as closely as possible on one side of the room, body splayed out on the two cots on your left whilst you lie on the third. Every muscle in your body aches and burns like it’s been sitting over a fire for the better part of a day. There’s a slight itch to your throat, but you can’t even bring yourself to cough. You don’t move; you aren’t sure you could if you wanted to, so you don’t push it quite yet and instead settle for lying down and listening to the hushed whispers around you.

Seonghwa’s voice is the first to drift to your ears, and just the sound of it lets a bit of comfort sink into your heavy bones. You wish he was at your side and not across the room, and the small cravings for his hand in yours swell up in chest. Jongho speaks up after that with his deep timbre that rumbles against the soft sound of the air conditioner. And lastly, Yunho. His voice grates hard on your mind, and you wish you could fall asleep just so that you wouldn’t have to listen to it any longer. One quick glance to your left tells you that Yeosang is sprawled on the cot beside yours, and just past the steady rise and fall of his chest, you catch sight of Hongjoong’s blue head of hair.

Five people in the room, and San isn’t one of them.

Rest is out of the question at this point, especially with the swirling memories of the dream you woke up from not too long ago.

“Ah, Tsukio. There you are.”

“Tsukio?” You question, head falling to the side as confusion waves over you. Water continues to lap at your feet and pushes between your bare toes. “That’s �� you’ve never called me that before.”

“Yes, I have, child. Ever since the first time you visited me.”

Daichi turns back to the pebbles under him. He nudges them some more with the end of his twisted branch, then lets the stick splash against the surface of the lake. He pushes himself up to his full height, yet something about it doesn’t feel quite right. He isn’t as tall as you remember him to be. Not only that, but your body doesn’t feel the way it usually does. You feel heavier, like something is wrapped tight around you and pulling your shoulders down with its weight, but you can’t bring your hands up to look at them any longer.

“She is too close to you,” Daichi utters without sparing you another glance.

“She?”

“You were foolish enough to let the fire come in and scald you. The water will drown you in her embrace.��

“Wh-What?” You stammer through your endless confusion. You hardly have the mental capacity to be thinking about the meaning behind his riddles might be, but that added to the strange foreign sensation running through your system doesn’t help to ease your panic one bit.

“How often must I remind you of the prophecy before it sinks in through that skull of yours, Tsukio?”

You grit your teeth together to keep from snapping at the old man and telling him off. You want nothing more than to tell him that you are not Tsukio, you are not Umiko, you are just Y/N and nothing else. He has never even mentioned any sort of fucking prophecy to you in all the time you’ve been meeting with the damn man.

“The moon will meet the sea in fire, and guided by the earth, they will seek the sun. As the sun rises out of the east, so the moon will set in the west with waters crashing out of the south and the earth climbing in the north, and fires will blaze at the center of it all. Blood spilled over pale sands and misted skies.”

You find it in you to pull away from the man, although it takes far too much effort to do so, and you slide back across the mud. The sensation is strange between your toes, and you certainly don’t welcome it, but it carries you away from Daichi and his odd mutterings. That’s good enough for you. You don’t manage to pull that far away before your legs fail. Black waters splash around you when your knees sink into the mud. That’s the position you remain in for quite some time too; unable to pull yourself up and incapable of doing anything other than stare down at the swirling waters. It’s only when they still that your senses return. Because the reflection in the water is not your own.

The face blinking back at you does not belong to you.

It belongs to —

“Y/N.”

You jerk your head towards the sound of the voice, eyes honing in on broad shoulders before Seonghwa’s face comes into view. He kneels down beside your makeshift bed. The second he extends a hand to brush the loose strands of hair off your forehead, a wave of comfort hits you, and the gentle smile painting his lips almost convinces you that everything is okay.

“How are you feeling?” He inquires. His hand remains in your hair, nails now scraping therapeutic patterns across your scalp. The idea of sleeping again comes to mind, but you force yourself to sit up on your elbows and look closer at the man’s features.

Even if you were to put it kindly, Seonghwa looks like absolute shit. The deep circles under his eyes, shallow scratches over one cheekbone and a nasty purple bruise on the other. You can see white gauze under the collar of his form-fitting shirt that seems to snake up over his shoulder, but he uses that arm without any visible issue just fine. You hardly realize how your arm moves on its own accord, reaching up to cup the line of Seonghwa’s jaw, and your thumb drags over his scraped cheek.

“I’ve been through worse, princess,” he chuckles under his breath. The smile on his lips stretches to one of amusement, and if you had it in you, you might laugh back with him. But not now. Not while Yeosang and Hongjoong remain unconscious beside you, and nearly half the crew is unaccounted for.

“I’m – I’m sore,” you manage after a couple of seconds of easy silence.

“Not surprised. You were given a pretty strong tranquilizer.”

It comes back to you then, an almost instantaneous shift in your demeanor as you remember what exactly went down prior to you passing out. Nothing too dramatic or memorable compared to the finale. If you had thought that Han Jisung wouldn’t haunt your thoughts after that, then you would have looked a fool on all accounts. Seonghwa notices the tension that rises in your body, and his hand drops from your head to your shoulder, squeezing gently at the flesh under his fingers. He opts not to comment on your unfocused gaze; rather, he motions towards Yeosang and Hongjoong behind him.

“We don’t know when they’ll be up. Yunho was up within a few hours, but his dosage was apparently a lot lower than yours and Yeosang’s were since he didn’t pose as much of a threat.” You squint at Yeosang’s reclining body once before pulling yourself up into a better sitting position. Seonghwa moves with you, hand never leaving your form for a second, and he’s there to steady you when you wobble a little upon swinging your legs over the edge of the cot. You don’t dare to get up from there, content to just sit and stew as you watch the unconscious crewmates in front of you.

“What happened?” You ask after quite some time.

“I can explain that a bit more when Yeosang wakes. It’s… um—” Seonghwa doesn’t let himself finish the thought. Your heart twinges in your chest, although you know that it isn’t on your own accord because of the way Seonghwa’s expression shifts. His gaze falls to the floor past your cot. You don’t press him for answers, but it is more than clear enough to tell that something awful has happened in the time you were unconscious. Your initial reaction is: no, don’t tell me, I don’t want to know. I would be better off not knowing.

That devolves in a matter of seconds thanks to the worry rolling off Seonghwa’s body in waves. You bring a hand up to the one he has resting atop your shoulder then with a hesitant grasp take his lithe, long fingers between yours and offer whatever minimal comfort you can to him.

“Hongjoong is lucky to be alive.”

If Hongjoong is lucky to be alive, then what of Mingi? Where is he? Is he in a similar condition? Better? Worse? Wooyoung isn’t at Yeosang’s bedside. San isn’t at yours. So where the fuck are they? In another room? If they managed to cram three cots together in this one, then surely they could have made some more room for the others as well.

“We need to let him rest longer, give him time to recover, and let his body catch up on sleep as well. So hopefully Yeosang will get up soon, and you won’t have to stay waiting for an explanation for too long.”

Seonghwa’s words exude a sense of finality, and yet he doesn’t move away from you. He stays put and brings his gaze up to trail over your features. He seeks something in them that you aren’t aware of, a dash of confusion to his dark orbs that has your stomach churning every which way, and you can’t pretend not to know why.

“I thought I would lose you both,” he whispers so quietly that only you can hear the words. “I fear that I won’t be able to have you as fairly as I promised bec-because–”

“Do you still love him?”

“Not in that way any longer.”

“We can talk about that later,” you say, cutting Seonghwa’s thought short despite the fact that you already know where it was headed. It is an easy feeling for you to understand because every aspect of your life seems to drag you back to Jisung somehow. If Hongjoong is Seonghwa’s weak spot, then Jisung is most definitely yours. Too much is happening for you to properly process it all at the moment, so part of you demands to postpone that conversation with Seonghwa as much as possible if only to let you have time to gather your bearings and work through the confusion. Some things can wait. Others cannot. What happened before you got here is one of those that cannot wait. That conversation with Seonghwa can. And Jisung… Jisung is a thought that you will push to the deepest recesses of your mind and avoid with as much willpower as you can muster because while you should have seen this coming, you are still reeling.

He always spoke of coming to Kebos once he retired. It was his dream for the both of you. You didn’t have word for word confirmation that he was alive but you knew quite well that he escaped Eros prior to the execution then he disappeared from your radar. You figured he would be here and yet… you could never have expected him to be in the arena when he was or do whatever it is he did. To the outside eye – to Seonghwa – it might seem like an attack, and that would be logical since Jisung didn’t seem to know who you were until you said his name. However, he had to have seen you before the attack, he had to have known it was you, he said your name without an ounce of hesitation, and he was very clearly watching you because you could sense a presence before he showed himself. If he had wanted to kill you, he would have done so. He could have killed Yeosang and Yunho as well, but here they are, alive and for the most part well with you. San… Wooyoung… you don’t want to think that Jisung would kill either of them, and you don’t want to think that they are dead either.

What exactly was Jisung doing in that tunnel?

You are so lost in those thoughts that you don’t feel Seonghwa pulling away to face where Yeosang lays behind him. Jongho comes closer to the bedside, head stretching out to rest atop your head, and the gentle weight soothes you enough to bring you out of the intruding thoughts. He seems to be in far better condition than Seonghwa is – you can’t spot a single scratch or bruise on his face at least, but his knuckles are all battered. His red eyes are tired and bloodshot in a way that is concerning. He reassures you with a gentle smile before pulling his hand away from your head.

“Yeosang?” Seonghwa nudges the sleeping man with the back of his hand. At first, the blonde doesn’t budge even an inch and remains so still that you would believe that he’s dead if not for the steady rise and fall of his chest. Seonghwa bothers to prod at his shoulder once more, this time garnering a reaction from the man as the Elitist bolts upright on his cot. His body still seems to be on the offensive because he nearly clocks Seonghwa right in the nose with a wildly swinging arm, but the latter deflects the awkward attack before it can make contact.

“Where are we?” Yeosang asks the moment he somewhat gathers his bearings.

“We’re at a hostel not far outside the city, but at a safe distance from the arena.” Seonghwa stands up straight as Yeosang continues to blink around the room. It’s only a matter of time before the blond begins to ask more questions, including ones surrounding Wooyoung’s absence, but Seonghwa beats him to it. “Now that you’re both awake, we can better explain what exactly happened. As soon as Vladimir figured out that it was Mingi down in the arena, he detonated the electromagnetic bomb underneath the building that sent an intense electrical current through the arena itself. Neither Hongjoong or Mingi had time to react or withdraw, so they were both caught in the majority of the blast, but it also stirred up an awful duststorm, which flooded the base and tunnels surrounding the bomb. Then, Vlad dispatched several fighting units to no doubt dispatch of us before we could escape. Jongho and I went down to get Mingi and Hongjoong. We could hardly see a thing in there because of the dust, and it was only when it cleared that we were able to find Hongjoong, unconscious and beaten within an inch of his life. Mingi was nowhere to be found.”

Your gaze flits back down to where Hongjoong lies. His face is turned to the opposite wall so you can’t see the evidence of his fighting all too well, but several bruises poke out of the collar of his shirt. That is enough to tell you how bad things got for him.

“We spent so long searching for Mingi,” Seonghwa continues through a deep sigh. You shift to glance towards Jongho, but the Berserker stares at the floor without moving a muscle. His expression is impossible to read, and you can’t bring yourself to try to figure out how he feels about this. The exhaustion alone on his features tells you about how well he’s taking the situation. “There was only one exit, and that was the tunnel you all were already in. We assumed that we could carry Hongjoong out and find you all with Mingi in the tunnel. However… when we came in, it was worse than we could have imagined. The two of you and Yunho were all lying face down, completely unconscious, and there was a man with a green hood standing close to your body, Y/N. We – I immediately confronted him because I thought it had been his doing, but he claimed that he did not do anything to harm you all. There was still no sign of Mingi there either.”

Seonghwa must have more to say than that. You can hardly believe that he wouldn’t breathe a word about Wooyoung or San, but his continued hesitance offers no comfort and only makes you want to make a break for the door and get out of this damn room. Yeosang picks up on that as well, and this time he is quick enough to ask a question.

“And what of the others? Wooyoung?”

Seonghwa’s tongue pokes out to moisten his lips. He doesn’t respond right away, then he reaches for his pocket, pulling a shattered wristband out and passing it to Yeosang without a word. You lean forward to look on as well but regret it the moment you catch a glimpse of the screen. It’s the band that was assigned to Wooyoung, and you only know that because of the small initials flashing in the corner of the cracked screen. You don’t get to look longer than a moment; next thing you know, Yeosang is pushing himself to his feet and hurling the band across the room. It hits the brick wall with a loud clatter. He must not have all his strength back quite yet because just the simple movement has Yeosang stumbling and falling to his knees. Seonghwa tries to catch him a moment too late, hand clasping around Yeosang’s forearm the second he hits the floor.

“Wh-Where is he?” Yeosang asks, tone heavy with labored breaths.

“We… we don’t know, Yeosang.” The lack of confidence in Seonghwa’s tone betrays how he truly feels, and it scares you when he glances up to meet your eyes. The next words to fall from his lips are far worse. “San is gone too.”

Gone.

Choi San is gone.

“No,” you choke out, hardly aware that you say the small word of denial out loud. “Not again. I-I… pl-please—”

“What would’ve happened if you died out there?”

The world suddenly feels a lot less real, like you’re stuck in a pathetic state of limbo and watching everything happen around you without being a part of it. There is a stabbing pain in your chest that lingers for far too long.

“And I wasn’t there to be with you. What would I have done if you died before I told you how much I care about you?”

Seonghwa, Yunho, Jongho, Yeosang, Hongjoong. Five people in the room. And not one is San.

This time when you reach out to Seonghwa, it’s a desperate attempt to have something ground you. Jongho moves to intercept your movements and stand in Seonghwa’s place, but the lieutenant doesn’t let him do so; instead, he slips away from Yeosang and closer to you. His fingers slip between yours, squeezing tightly at your hand, and his other hand moves around your waist. He anchors himself there, the sinking sensation of his warmth filling your senses as you drink it in deeper and deeper. The black waters of panic surge around you.

This is what you feared would happen.

The reason why you were so adamant and desperate not to get attached.

Seonghwa braces his body against yours. The anchor sinks deeper. You ball your fists around the fabric of his coat, clinging to it like a lifeline, and your panicked gaze drops to where Yeosang still kneels on the floor. Jongho squats beside him now, having taken Seonghwa’s place by his side. If your pain and fear are this deep, then you cannot even begin to imagine how Yeosang is feeling at this moment in time.

Can love be so powerful that it changes the deepest parts of a person? You would like to believe that yes, it can. And you can only say that because of the way Kang Yeosang – an Elitist, an arrogant and logic-inclined Elitist – is hunched over on the floor sobbing into his hands. Sobbing could not even begin to describe his cries, in all honesty. They are wretched and awful, so broken at the seams that every crack in Yeosang’s usually so-put-together composure shows every drop of pain in his body. You aren’t sure what you expected from him — perhaps anger? Rage directed towards Seonghwa and Jongho for not getting there sooner? Towards himself for failing to keep Wooyoung safe? Towards you since you gave your word to him?

You aren’t sure if it’s the panic gradually residing or if Seonghwa is influencing your emotions somehow with his closeness and the heat of his breath on your ear, but your heart slowly comes down to a more regular pace. The intense pain over your heart remains quite present. You can manage that; Yeosang, however, just seems to be devolving further and further into a drastic state of hysteria thanks to the news. There is nothing you can do — nothing any of you could possibly do to console him unless you brought Wooyoung through the door right this instant.

Sometimes, on days that were not so busy or stressful, you would find yourself in the mess hall with Yeosang and Wooyoung, maybe with Jongho or San at your side as well. You never put much thought into it back in the heat of the moment, just filtered through things and stored certain memorable moments in the recesses of your brain. But something you could always clearly see from Yeosang – something you see every single time he looks at the dark-haired man – is the way the Elitist would look at Wooyoung as though he held every star in the universe in the palm of his hand. Now you can reason it out and know why exactly Yeosang would look at Wooyoung in such a way.

Because the man hunched over on the floor before you is crying as though the light of his life has been taken from him, like he is fully enshrouded in such an intensity of darkness that there is no way out.

They are doing nothing more than the rest of every last sorry soul in the universe: trying to create what would be their perfect world. Fate has deprived them of enough. Who are you to take more from them?

You would make every last monster who took Wooyoung from Yeosang pay a hundred times over, just as you would do the same to the ones who took San from you.

Jongho maintains a steady touch on his shoulders, one hand squeezing tightly around each one, but the gesture doesn’t slow or stop the cries falling from Yeosang’s lips. It’s with a rare look of desperation that Seonghwa focuses his attention on Yunho, and with an unspoken plea for Yunho to give him something, anything. All the healer can manage is a shake of his head, and he returns to watching Yeosang sob forlornly. For Yunho of all people to admit that there isn’t anything he can do to help the man right now is a punch in the gut. Seonghwa leans away from you to mutter something into the shell of Jongho’s ear, and the Berserker offers a curt nod in response.

“Let’s get you some food,” Seonghwa whispers once he turns back to you. “Jongho will stay with Yeosang for now and… try his best to calm him down some. At least enough so that we can discuss further and talk about a plan.” Seonghwa sinks his teeth into his lower lip. “I wish — I’m sorry I don’t have more answers. I wish I could give you more than what we have now.” The way Seonghwa gazes at you speaks more than the words that fall from his lips. The endless apologies on his mind that don’t come to light – you don’t need to hear any of them to know how he’s feeling and how he’s blaming himself for not doing more.

When he stands, you move with him, albeit on shaky legs that aren’t used to the sudden pressure. Yunho leads the way out of the room without a word. Again the world seems to shift under your feet, like a cruel slap to the face, and you can almost feel yourself slipping back into a dingy and rusted cell. Your mind is so disconnected from reality that you don’t even fully fall into a flashback; it comes in snippets instead, gross figments of your past that you don’t want anymore.

“He’s not coming back. I told him to leave for good.”

“H-He wouldn’t do that, Hyunwoo. He wouldn’t leave us. Jisung’s – he’s different, not like that!” Your hand clasp desperately at the iron bars separating you from the broad-shouldered man. Hyunwoo dips his chin to his chest.

“Forgive me, Y/N… the only way I could convince him to leave was to – was to tell him that you were dying with me.” Your throat goes impossibly dry. “Jisung is gone. As soon as they take your chains off, you should do the same. Get the hell out of here, get off this planet, and – and do better.”

Seonghwa’s hand rests on the small of your back. The pressure of his palm increases with each passing second. It pulls you back and gives you glimpses of the present. A dark hallway, stairs, a smiling woman who motions towards an empty table.

“I – Hyunwoo, I didn’t even get to say goodbye!”

“I’m sorry. This was the only way I could save you all. Maybe one day you will get to see each other again, and you can tell him the truth. And he can tell you the truth.”

Sitting down, Yunho sitting across from you.

“What fucking truth? You can’t do this now of all times, Hyunwoo! It isn’t the time to be cryptic and mysterious!”

Seonghwa’s hand still on you.

“You’ll understand one day, Y/N. I promise.”

You don’t understand a thing. And you certainly don’t get why life or fate or whatever the fuck it is keeps wrenching the people you care about from your grasp.

“Do you at least know whether they’re alive?” You ask, tone hesitant and quiet yet pleading at the same time.

“San and Mingi both had their wristbands still on. Vital signs were active for quite some time but…” You don’t even care that there is a ‘but’. Simply hearing that the vital signs were active is enough to wrench a relieved sigh from your lips. “We have reason to believe that they were taken off-planet. The bands only work within a certain range, and the atmosphere affects them greatly as well. Since we were all on-planet, I didn’t set the frequencies to adjust for space travel. I-I should’ve thought of all the possibilities and planned accordingly.”

The woman from earlier bustles around the table, delivering plates of an assortment of foods from bread to fruits to meats. Despite hunger curling in your gut, you aren’t sure that you can stomach the food anyway. Seonghwa nudges a plate in your direction, and you decide to at least put in a bit of an effort for him, if only to make him feel better.

“It’s not your fault.”

The words surprise both you and Seonghwa, heads whipping up to look at the man who spoke in unison. Yunho stares down at the table as though he hasn’t breathed a word at all, but you all know what he said, heard it loud and clear.

“Pardon?” Seonghwa says after blinking away his shock.

“It’s not your fault. There was no way you could have expected what would happen on the mission. Even if you did expect it, there was no possible way of preventing the damage that was done. Thus… it is not your fault.”

“Forgive me if I don’t trust comfort coming from your lips, Yunho.”

The healer sighs upon hearing Seonghwa’s clipped tone, carefully setting his fork down beside his plate, and when he glances up at the lieutenant, his gaze is unreadable.

“I feel guilty too, you know. For not fighting more, doing more, not being strong enough, for not being the one they took. Seeing… seeing Yeosang’s reaction and Y/N’s reaction — those things make me wish that I had been taken in Wooyoung or San’s place. In Mingi’s place. I know you feel the same way, just as we both wish that we could have taken Hongjoong’s place in the arena.” Seonghwa’s fingers curl into a tight fist against the wood of the table. “I do not want to admit this, and it truly pains my pride to say it, but I do realize the truth of the situation. If things had gone worse for Hongjoong, then you would have lost the most out of everyone.”

“Comparing losses is like comparing apples to oranges, Yunho. A loss to me is far different than a loss to you. It isn’t about who loses more.”

“Yet, you would have had to step up and become captain right away. Be on the bridge of the ship alone for the first time in years but with the knowledge that he wouldn’t be coming back. Bury Ho–”

“Is it your goal to pain me right now?” Seonghwa asks through gritted teeth. His tone is almost choked in the way it strains in the back of his throat, evidence of how upset the mere thought of Yunho’s words are making him. Yet, for once, you don’t feel as though Yunho is intentionally trying to upset him. As shitty as it may be, you almost think that it is his attempt at an apology. Yes, his ego and pride and a whole slew of other issues that he has have not gone away and are blocking him from providing a proper apology. But his tone is not aggressive or seeking to draw anger out of Seonghwa.

“It’s not. We both know Hongjoong will awaken and that he will recover. He will be okay, and he’s come back from worse in the past. That doesn’t mean we shouldn’t worry, but it allows us to have more confidence this time around. And I know that when he does wake up, your name will be the first on his lips. What Vladimir said before Hongjoong descended into the arena — he mentioned how Hongjoong looks at you like you’re something precious. Still. Even after all this time and everything you’ve been through together, he still looks at you the same way. I merely feel an unreasonable and unruly amount of jealousy when I think about it.”

“And that jealousy drives you to overstep boundaries and lines you should not cross.”

“Then we share in that jealousy.” Yunho’s gaze flits up to meet Seonghwa’s across the table. You expect some sort of altercation to unfold between them, but for the time being, they both remain level-headed. The thread keeping Seonghwa tethered is wearing thinner and thinner by the second; you can see it in the way his clenched fist trembles. “He didn’t start coming to me to slight you, Seonghwa. It was never about rubbing it in or trying to hurt you. He only came to me because he didn’t want to hurt you.”

The thing about love is that no matter how hard you try to force it down, no matter how much you kick and scratch and bite at it in a desperate attempt to push it away, it always comes back with more force than before. The more you fight it, the more it spreads. The thoughts that invade your mind, the memories clinging to your skin like a disease, the emotions curling sharp talons into your heart. So no matter how much Seonghwa claims to love you, he will always be fighting his love for Hongjoong. The same can be said of you and your love for Jisung, or even your care for San. Love is not something you can force out of your heart; it is something that you must gradually grow out of, and you only realize now that all your attempts to run away have made it worse.

“Y/N, I—” Yunho cuts his thought short to look towards the ceiling. He must have had enough of the conversation with Seonghwa, tone shifting as he changes the topic over to you. “You did not run away even though you had every opportunity to.”

“Don’t give me one now.” Yunho is trying to say that he was wrong, and you can recognize that. Seonghwa surely can as well. If it’s forgiveness he’s after, however, you aren’t inclined to give it to him quite yet. An apology given under the guise of narcissism doesn’t deserve forgiveness, and forgiveness given in that situation would only breed further issues later on down the line. The selfish part of you also just doesn’t want to forgive him yet.

The meal continues on in silence for quite some time. You don’t bother with trying to figure out how much time passes exactly; all you know is that the air surrounding the table is terse at best. Things only change when Yunho decides to speak again, although this time it’s to drop bombshell information that you could never have predicted.

“You know my mother was murdered here on Kebos.” He doesn’t look up from his plate, but both you and Seonghwa again jerk to stare in his direction.

“I thought she died of illness,” Seonghwa whispers.

“She did. The illness was poison. Poison administered by one Vladimir the Bloody.”

“I — Yunho, I had no idea th—”

“It was my job, my duty, my responsibility to heal her. I knew what to do, I knew how to heal her, how to extract the poison from her body, and I couldn’t do it. Every case I take on is a selfish attempt for me to reconcile those mistakes. To, if nothing else, prove to myself that I am not the failure who watched on as his mother died because he was too weak to save her. I didn’t save my mother, I didn’t keep Mingi from killing his father, and I didn’t save Cass. I broke Jongho’s trust, failed Y/N when she confronted me with the truth, and I cannot count on one hand the amount of times that I’ve failed you, Seonghwa. I’m not asking you to pity me or feel sorry for me. When I first woke up and started treating Hongjoong, you begged me to save him. I do not fear Vladimir taking another life from me. I fear not being able to do the job that is expected of me when the going gets rough.” Yunho drops his hands to the table, letting his palms lie flat against the wood. “I don’t care what you think of me. Whether you find me to be selfish and egotistical — that does not matter to me. I just refuse to let you look at me like I’m still that failure who is helpless and naive. I see it enough when I look in the mirror.”

Seonghwa inhales sharply as Yunho speaks but does not make an effort to come up with any sort of reply until well after the healer has stopped talking.

“Never once have I thought you to be a failure, Yunho,” he mutters. “Nor have I ever despised you. All my anger is directed at myself and Hongjoong. I never wanted you to get dragged into that, but things just happened this way. It’s unavoidable when we all work in such close quarters day in and day out.” Seonghwa sighs and drops his chin to his chest. A hesitant hand reaches up to comb through his dark hair, pushing it off his forehead, then that same hand drops down to his side. “You two should eat quickly. I’m meeting with someone here soon.”

“You are?”

“Yes, the man we found with your bodies initially. I asked to question him about what he saw, if he has anything we can use to find the others, and he agreed to meet me here.”

“Consider me gone,” Yunho sighs, leaning away from the table. “I need to check on Hongjoong and dress his wounds again. And have a chat with Yeosang if he’s any less… hysterical.” Seonghwa offers a hasty nod. Yunho continues pushing away from the table until he’s on his feet, and he doesn’t wait for you to move before he walks up the stairs and out of sight. A hand drops onto your thigh, not searching for anything more than the small contact.

“I would not be opposed to you staying here with me during this meeting.”

“Do you think this person might try something?”

“I doubt he would be so bold as to do that. It’s just that… well, your presence brings me peace.” Seonghwa whispers the words under his breath as though they’re meant for your ears only.

“Because of what we are,” you state even though it was initially meant to be a question. Seonghwa huffs out a quiet laugh and shakes his head a little.

“If that’s what you would like to believe, then yes.”

Seonghwa’s hand falls away from your thigh. At first, you think you’ve done or said something wrong, but the way his back straightens and eyes grow cold tells you that it is something else entirely. You follow his line of sight to the door to the hostel, catching the way it swishes open, and a hooded figure steps through. It must be the man Seonghwa saw in the arena, but you can’t quite catch his face through the harsh shadows his hood casts over his face. Some odd feeling twists in your gut as he moves towards your table, like you already know what is about to happen, and yet that still cannot prepare you for it.

Because when the man slides into the spot where Yunho just sat and tugs his green cloak back to expose his face, you truly feel as though you have entered some strange distortion of reality.

“I don’t believe I introduced myself when we last met, Lieutenant of Death,” he says, tone as clear and teasing as the day you met him all those years ago. “My name is Jisung. Han Jisung. I hope you’ll remember it.”

“I’m sure I will,” Seonghwa exhales through a tight smile. He motions towards you, eyes remaining glued to Jisung’s features as he speaks again. “This is—”

“Y/N L/N, Ghost of Eros. Oh, where to begin with her repertoire? Best sniper in the military of Eros. Assassin of the King of Eros. One of six members in Unit 24, a reconnaissance and extermination team operating under the esteemed military of Eros. Recruit number 17. Little lady, perhaps?” He smiles at you with every passing word. Smiles like not a day has passed and nothing has changed between the two of you. Round cheeks balling up with the same joy they always did in the past, and you nearly believe that time has frozen for the two of you when you see it. Seonghwa brings you back to reality, eyes wide and flashing confusing as he glances between Jisung’s smiling face and your more solemn one.

“You two… do you know each other?”

“Han Jisung, otherwise known in the past as the assassin and reconnaissance specialist of Unit 24. Recruit number 41.”

Seonghwa inhales so sharply that the air whistles through his teeth. His gaze is on you, and you can feel it so intensely that you almost want to burst into tears to alleviate some of the pressure in your head. You have reached the point of no return, chest so tight with emotion that you somehow feel nothing at all when you blink back at Jisung. It haunts you — the mere fact that you are looking at the man who once held your whole existence in the palm of his hand as though he means absolutely nothing to you.

A hand slips back over your thigh, searching for your own desperately, and you know Seonghwa just wants to offer whatever comfort he can right now. The damage is already done. The dam is already broken. And your words spill forth with a reckless abandon that you never imagined you could muster up.

“You knocked me to the ground and injected me with some sort of potent anesthesia. Whoever the hell was with you in that tunnel did the same to my four crewmates. When I woke up, it was to find that two of those crewmates are gone. You’re smart enough to realize how bad that looks for you.”

“I… I do,” Jisung says, tone falling quiet, and his smile droops a bit at the corners. Seonghwa levels him with a suspicious glare, but he doesn’t add anything more for the time being. “I hardly expected this to go over well, but all I can do is plea that you hear me out. My boss — the man I now work for asked for two people to be brought out of that arena. The Brute of Kebos and the Ghost of Eros.” Your throat turns to sandpaper, and Seonghwa’s hand clenches harshly around your leg. Jisung’s lips twitch as he grins a little wider. “You know I’ve never been good at following orders, especially when they come from a leader I can’t see directly. I have two superiors — my boss and my captain. My captain is the one who dispatched me and my three crewmates to take care of the mission. I have never met or seen my boss; I don’t know his name, his face, anything about him. That made it easy to decide what to do, because as soon as I heard ‘Ghost of Eros’, I knew I wouldn’t be able to take you. So, when I went into that tunnel and saw you with four other people, I made a spur of the moment decision to take two others under the guise that… that we simply could not find the Ghost of Eros, but we brought two others instead.”

“You used my crew as a bargaining chip?” Seonghwa seethes.

“To protect Y/N, yes. I know that if it meant protecting your crew, you would do the same.”

Seonghwa’s jaw stutters, but he is unable to come up with any sort of reasonable or logical response. Jisung is right, and you all know it. That doesn’t keep your rage from overflowing, although it isn’t directed at the man across the table. More than that, ti’s what he said. That his boss — whoever that may be — wanted you, and because of you, both Wooyoung and San were taken. Guilt sweeps over your whole body, overtakes your senses in less than a second, and before you know it, your vision blurs with unshed tears.

“You should have fucking let them have me,” you spit before a dry sob tears through your throat.

Because of you, your team fell to pieces and broke apart. Juyeon abandoned his best friend. Soojin left the only family she had. Ash lost all the people he looked up to. Jisung gave up everything. And Hyunwoo walked to his death.

“Why wouldn’t you let them have me? What were you thinking? That you couldn’t set me free at some point on the way back to your boss? That I couldn’t fucking protect myself? Why would you take them in my place?”

Because of you, Wooyoung was taken. San was taken. The light of Yeosang’s life is gone. All your past mistakes rush back to greet you, reflected in the face of the man before you.

“Even after all this time, you would always be my priority.”

Seonghwa snakes his hand around your back, fingers dancing over your spine as he lifts it to brush against the base of your neck. You wish that the action would bring you comfort, that it would do something to alleviate the burning pain spreading through your chest, yet it does nothing except make your tears roll over the balls of your cheeks. Jisung’s brows knit together as he watches you cry. He stretches a hand halfway across the table and stops there, unsure about going the rest of the way.

“If I had known what they meant to you… I’m sorry, Y/N.”

“If you had known what they meant to me, you still would have done it.” Jisung shifts his jaw at your words, eyes blinking away from yours and confirming what you already know to be true. There’s another question on your lips, one that you desperately want to ask but can’t bring yourself to speak into existence, so it dies in the back of your throat with your cries. Seonghwa’s fingers continue their methodical drags over the base of your neck.

“That is true, yes, but — but now it means that I can help you get them back. All of them, including the Brute of Kebos.”

“What’s the catch?” Seonghwa inquires. Jisung wets his lips then presses them tightly together before speaking again. His gaze falls on you, the soft gleam in them taking you back to a starlit night full of cherrywood and sugar and the taste of honey and vanilla on your tongue.

“I want to retire from this life of… constant running and fighting and following orders. I want to do something for myself, but someone made me a promise a few years ago. To retire with me, move here on Kebos, and put that life behind us. If I’m going to help you, I need a surefire promise that after we get them back, Y/N will come back to Kebos with me.”

“That is not a deal I can agree to. Not without having time to discuss it with both Y/N and my captain—”

“Are you not the acting captain, Park Seonghwa? I saw the extent of the damage done in that arena, most delivered by none other than the Brute of Kebos. You can’t tell me that he will be up anytime soon, and I doubt your friends can wait that long for an agreement on your part.”

“Don’t – don’t drag him into this,” you mutter, trying to keep your tone as flat as possible. “I’ll do it.”

“Y/N, no.” Seonghwa blinks down at you. His eyes are wide and glassy, and even just those two words convey more emotion than you thought possible. He said he was afraid to lose both you and Hongjoong. What about when it comes to choosing between three crewmates – people he’s been with for years now – and you, someone he’s only known for months. It isn’t a decision you would wish on anyone. You don’t know what you would do in such a position. You do know that you would rather see yourself back in a prison cell for treason than let Wooyoung, San, and Mingi be taken to some god-forsaken place. As Seonghwa once said, sacrifice and trust go hand in hand. Now, he needs to trust that this is the best decision you can make and let you make it.

“You love her,” Jisung states, drawing Seonghwa’s gaze off you for a moment. “What is love compared to duty? Would it keep you from agreeing to my help, something invaluable in this situation?”

“You would do well not to romanticize love in such a way otherwise you will be sorely disillusioned. Love contains the freedom to choose what you want without the other person making any decision for you. Hence why if this is what Y/N wants to agree to, then I will compromise for her.” There lies a hidden meaning in Seonghwa’s words. They aren’t just meant to defend himself and explain his reasoning, but criticize Jisung for what lies behind his bargain.

“Love means keeping promises as well.”

Those words bring a dramatic halt to your tears, causing anger to bubble up in your gut as you process them, and all you can think is how fucking hypocritical it is of him to say such a thing.

“Don’t subject me to a life without you in it, Jisung.”

“I could never. I love you far too much to do that.”

“Promise me that you won’t.”

“I swear on my life that I’ll never leave you.”

“Then why did you not keep the ones you made me?”

“I was told that you were going to die.”

“If you had truly believed that… If our positions had been swapped, I would have at least stayed and done something to stop it.”

“I suppose that’s where we have our differences then. I trusted Hyunwoo enough to believe him when he told me you were both slated to die and that I should leave. But you’ve always had a problem with trust, haven’t you?”

“I think it’s best if you stop talking before you ruin your chances of walking out of here alive,” Seonghwa retorts before you can come up with a response.

“You wouldn’t dare kill me when I’m the only one who can help right now.”

“No, but I can hurt you just enough to leave you within of life and force the information out of you. I do not wear the mantle of ‘Lieutenant of Death’ for show. Although, if you truly believe that it’s merely a farce, I would be more than happy to show you how I got the title. You have what you want. She’s agreed to this deal of yours, which means it’s now on you to uphold your end of the bargain.”

Jisung regards the man with nothing more than a wavering glance for several seconds. Then he drops his head, a messy mop of blond hair falling forward to cover his forehead.

“I can meet you here again tomorrow morning, but it’s too late to be going out right now. My guess is that your captain will need at least three days before he can even be well enough to move to your ship.”

“It will only take him two. He’s a determined son of a bitch after all.”

“Of course he is. I’d expect nothing less from someone of his notoriety. Tomorrow, I can bring information concerning where they’ve taken your crew as well as what they intend to do with them, if I can. Boss has been pretty mum about his intentions, but I can at least figure out what they’ll do with two he didn’t ask for.”

“Won’t your captain be suspicious of your absence?”

“My captain is none other than Vladimir the Bloody. He doesn’t care to keep tabs on his men when they aren’t working a job for him. My job is complete. All that’s left for me to do is report back on the status of the mission. After that… I can easily eavesdrop on his conversations with the boss. I’m a Spectre, after all, and a damn good one at that. I’ll do my part. You have my word.” Jisung pushes himself up from the table, stepping over the bench and turning around to face you again in one move. “Y/N, if there had been any other way to get you out of there, I would have done it in a heartbeat.”

You answer him with silence. Your bloodshot eyes avoid his features like the plague. You only decide to look at the place where he just stood when you hear a door swishing, and it’s empty when your gaze falls upon it. Seonghwa’s hand slips down to meet yours. He intertwines his fingers through yours without saying anything, offering a silent plea for you to follow him when he too stands up. And you do. You let him pull you to your feet and up the stairs without complaint, even when he stops in front of a new door and guides you inside. It’s a single bedroom, much different than the one you woke up in, and Seonghwa parts from you there with a gentle kiss to your forehead and a whispered promise that he will be right back.

You hardly process a thing as you fall to your side on the bed and tuck your legs up into your chest so that you are curled into the most fetal position you can manage. The darkness in the room adds to your dazed state, shadows blur together into almost human-like forms in the edges of your vision, and you find yourself drifting back in time until your surroundings feel a lot more like that hotel in Echidna where San laid his soul bare before you.

A shaky hand reaches across the darkness to brush over the mattress as though San will appear under your fingers if you do so. He wouldn’t have been taken if not for you. Why won’t that thought leave your mind? The guilt that eats away at your stomach is far too much; it physically hurts you with every breath you heave, and your breaths rasp into the empty air before you. Fingers tighten around the linen sheets. The shadows almost come to a rest before you, almost morph into a face that is recognizable, so close to a dimpled smile and cat-like eyes.

Please be okay. Please be alive. I don’t know what I would do if you aren’t okay.

“Y/N.”

The voice doesn’t startle you or cause you to shift in the slightest. Every muscle in your body feels ten times heavier than before. Seonghwa slips into the empty space before you, causing that shadowy figure vaguely resembling San to dissipate into thin air. Whatever spell was binding you to the silence shatters, and you choke out a fresh sob. Seonghwa catches your wrist and tugs you into his embrace without hesitation. You can only press your forehead against his chest as tears begin to fall.

“This isn’t your fault, Y/N. I promise,” he murmurs, chin coming to rest atop your head. “You didn’t make them get taken, you aren’t the reason why they were taken. That decision… it was not yours. Jisung is the one responsible for that, not you. And he is paying for that choice by helping get them back.”

There is an elephant in the room. One so large and intruding that it occupies most of your thoughts as you listen to Seonghwa speak. You choose to continue avoiding it, running from him, pushing it back to the deepest recesses of your mind while you can.

“I’m t-tired of running from the – the past only for it to r-repeat itself,” you stutter through choked sobs. Seonghwa’s hold tightens around you.

“I know, Y/N. I know you are. I am too. But I understand. We are going to get this. All of us, with not one person left behind or forgotten.” His chin shifts until you feel his lips caressing the curve of your ear, hand tangled deep in your hair. “I’m here, I’m with you. I’m not going anywhere. For now. For as long as it lasts.”

When you first asked him to make that promise, you did not think that your time together would be so impossibly short, but now it truly feels like there is a ticking time bomb surrounding everything about you two.

“Why didn’t you ask him to make a different deal?”

“Because it was your choice, Y/N. I hate the mere thought of having to trade you for — I hate it. Yet if this is what you truly want… if you have a chance to rest peacefully at last with someone you love, who am I to deprive you of that? That is all I could ever want for you.”

“Stop me from doing it, Seonghwa,” you cry weakly. A pathetic whimper slips past your lips as you pull your head away from his chest to look him in the eye, and you are startled now because nothing could have prepared you for the sight before you. Tears paint the smooth skin of his cheeks, leaving ugly streaks down the side of his nose. “Make me stay. Please, I-I won’t stay otherwise. If nothing else just – just make me stay because I’m a Siren, because Hongjoong needs me, because you need me. Be selfish, please, I’m begging you.”

“I was selfish enough to have you as long as I did.” He smiles through the whisper. Not a happy or content smile, not one that brings you comfort, not one that blossoms a warmth in your chest. It’s one that takes your heart right out of your chest and squeezes it so painfully that you cannot breathe. “We can find another Siren. There are always others out there but this? This could be your only chance to have a normal and peaceful life.”

“I don’t want it. I don’t want normal or peaceful, I don’t want to go.”

“I think that deep down in your heart, you know that this is what you want. What you’ve always wanted. A chance to be free of expectations and pain. I would do anything to give you that opportunity, yet maybe Hongjoong and I are meant for each other simply because of what we are at the end of the day. Scourge of the Black Sea and the Lieutenant of Death. San told me that you have pardon papers. You can use those to clear you—”

“But they aren’t for me! They aren’t for me. I don’t want – I don’t deserve to be the one who is pardoned. What makes me more deserving than the man who died for me?”

“Oh, darling, if you could see yourself through my eyes, you would know that you are the most deserving person in the universe.” Seonghwa cups your cheek so gently, with such care, and holds you as though you are delicate and precious. “I know my fate, Y/N. It is to die amongst the black sea at my captain’s side. I do not think that is meant to be your fate though.” If you could possibly cry any harder than you are, you truly would. It is hard enough to breathe as it is, sobs continuing to tumble from your lips as Seonghwa keeps on holding you in the palm of his hand. “I’m sorry. I would do anything for you, but I cannot force you to stay. That is the one thing I cannot bring myself to do.”

You crash your lips against Seonghwa’s in a mess of salty tears and saliva, teeth clashing with his, but he’s right there with you, gasping into your mouth as a quiet sob slips through his previously unbroken visage. There is no more strength left in your body. You don’t have it in you to continue the kiss, and you can barely keep your eyes open at this point. When Seonghwa pulls his mouth away from yours, you can’t even chase him for another kiss, letting him slip a hand behind your head and tuck you into his shoulder. Hot breath ghosts down the back of your neck. You cling to it as desperately as you can like it’s the last bit of warmth you will ever be able to have from him, even though you know deep down that that is not true. He carries you into a deep sleep like that, and it is a sleep that awakens new dreams in you with new and haunting implications to them that you won’t be able to explain come morning.

…

Panic surges through your veins, startling you into a state of consciousness, but when your eyes open you can only see dark shadows in your vision. You aren’t alone. You know that much thanks to the steady sounds of breathing around you – at least two people with you, wherever it is you are. There is a strange sensation about your body, one that you recognize from your previous visit to the Dreamscape, but you cannot see well enough to stare down at your body and figure out what it is. Two shaky hands dart up to your neck, clasping around something terribly cold and metal. It’s a collar of sorts, and it refuses to budge even a centimeter as you try to yank at it.

A finger slips under the ridge of the metal. You brush over the cold skin there only to find a blossoming scar across your neck, one that spreads no matter how far you move your hand along the collar. You jerk your hand out from under it with a growing feeling of disgust churning in your stomach.

In the very least, your eyes are starting to adjust to the darkness, and you can make out the two figures with you. One sits off in the furthest corner of whatever cell you’re being held in. Broad shoulders slumped forward and showing unconsciousness, but you can detect the faintest scent of blood coming from him. The other is closer to you, only an arm’s length away from you, but his head faces away from you so you can’t make out any of his features.

You dare to reach out to him, forcing your tired muscles into action as you drag yourself closer to him. Even through the darkness, your hands look far too masculine to belong to you, but you hardly have time to think about that when you pull the man to face you.

A strip of white in his hair. Unmistakable features, even in the dark.

San.

You stumble back with a gasp, head hitting the metal wall behind you so hard that your vision goes spotty for several seconds. You still can’t see straight as you force yourself towards the other man in the corner. Hands fumble over his collar, jerking and pulling until his head falls forward into your waiting hands. Fluttering lashes pull his eyes open. Red eyes. Close-cut hair on the sides, blood trickling down the side of his temple.

Mingi.

You lose all control of your body — if you can even call it your body. Something else takes over, something pushes its way forward and assumes full control when Mingi fully comes to and squints at you. Off to the side, San is waking up as well, a soft grunt falling from his lips that has the body you’re in darting back over to where he’s hunched.

“San, are you okay?” The words aren’t yours. The voice is foreign but not quite, only odd because it feels like it is coming from your lips.

You can remember it now. The face in the water was not your own. It was Wooyoung’s. You remember it oh so clearly because it scared you so much the moment you saw it. You were in the Dreamscape yet you were in Wooyoung’s body.

San blinks himself to full consciousness, squinting harshly through the dark to look at you better.

“Wooyoung?”

✧✧✧ a/n: hi yes welcome. welcome. to the finale of act four. welcome yes wow can you believe it? i can’t um yeah so !!! a TON happened! let me know what you think, how you feel, how much you hate me! i love to see it! that ending tho 👁👁

taglist: @faeriewoobin @sugarrimajins @atinyinwonderland @2504-life @lil7bluedragon @sparklychangbin @jeong-uwu @jeonartemis @anothershorthuman @xxbluestrifexx @haotheheckk @noonawriter @lostscenarios @nlost21 @mirror-juliet @okokokok123-45 @purple-aeon @theoinkypiglet @toothlessshiber @atinyarmyx1 @simpforhyunjin @hwangwoosan @vampire-jimin @softyubi @drumboydowoon @chatsgotmytongue @just-a-starfruit @babydolljo @scintillating-souls @khjssss @felixity @rawrrainn @hewwo-from-the-other-side

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.

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shslfanficreader · 3 years ago

Note

15, 18, 59, 82, 83 :)

15.) Favourite Research Lab?

Korekiyo’s, I really like the look and vibe, but I would also just love to spend time there and look at everything!

Miu’s is a close second, I love the look of it and it would probably be super interesting, but I would probably somehow get myself super killed.

18.) Favourite In-Game Moment

This is probably a really dark choice for a favourite in-game moment, or moments, but the executions. All of them. Easily my favourite part of the games. Part of what got me into Danganronpa was the executions too, so they hold a weird special place in my heart.

If those don’t count, Nagito’s suicide and the reveal of how everything was done and why he did it. It was insane, but that’s why I love it.

59.) Which Character Do You Easily Forget?

It’s not that I really forget him, I just don’t notice him as much, but the Ultimate Imposter/Twogami. I think it’s because I generally think of him as someone pretending to be someone else, and not as his own person (which is really bad, I know 😔), and he was also killed off in the games before we could learn much about him besides he looked like Togami, and I was spoiled, so I knew he wasn’t the real Byakuya, and with that plus his early death, plus already knowing he was the Ultimate Imposter, I didn’t really take that much notice of his character.

That being said, when I do take notice of and think about his character, I like him a lot and wish we got to learn more about the real Imposter, though since he was the Ultimate Imposter, that’s probably besides the point.

82.) A Character Who Acts Like A Friend?

I can honestly say that I don’t really have any friends irl. The only person I can say acts like anyone I know is Togami, and the person he acts like is my brother. They’re mostly comparable just because my brother and Togami are both people who won’t put up with any bullshit and are straight to the point, and will not sit around and listen to people when they know they have more expertise on the matter. They both also don’t react overly dramatically to anything, even if it shocks them and they can come across as cold due to their lack of showing their emotions. Yeah, that’s the best I can do sisjjaksks I’m sorry.

83.) A Character You’d Like To See As The Antagonist?

Ohhhhh so many!! Junko is such an iconic villain so she’d be hard to top (as Tsumugi knows) but here’s a bit of a list 😅also I know that this doesn’t really necessarily mean mastermind by ‘antagonist’ but that’s what popped into my mind when I thought of these characters as bad guys so I’m sorry.

Taka - I think it would be so cool to see the Ultimate Moral Compass be an antagonist in some way. I would love to see him as the mastermind, and have everyone realise that the person that always did the right thing was the person who caused all that despair. Also, the fanart of MM!Taka is amazing. Especially if the artist makes his suit half black or changes the colour of one of his eyes. It just looks so cool.

Chihiro/Alter Ego - I think it would be a real shock for everyone to find out that, out of everyone, it was Chihiro, that seemed so emotional and acted so weak, that was the mastermind. I gotta admit, this one is mostly because of the awesome fanart I’ve seen of MM!Chihiro. I would definitely recommend giving it a search if you’re interested.

I also think it would be really interesting to see a mastermind actually die during the game. Like, if Chihiro played the part he chose up until he was killed, but had Alter Ego to keep the game going after he was gone. It would be interesting to see a mastermind actually experience the despair of the game and dying in it, and not just watch and be executed or killed once they’re revealed. (I know Tsumugi is in the game, but I mean having the mastermind be murdered as part of the killing game, not die afterwards, and I don’t count Junko since she didn’t actually play the game until the last trial when she was revealed. If that makes any sense.)

Hiro - this is 100% because of the MM!Hiro au I saw someone was writing (as a fan comic I believe.) I can’t remember if there was a fic or if it was just a comic type of thing, but it was so good. Which is of course why I can’t remember the user that made it, so if anyone knows their url, please let me know so I can link their blog! But yeah, it was such a cool concept and know I’m sold.

Celeste - this is purely because I think her aesthetic and colour scheme is already mastermind-esque, and I’d love to see her in a full mastermind outfit lmao

Kazuichi - I read one fic about him as the mastermind and now it lives rent free in my head. Only reason.

Sonia - again, I just saw someone mention it once and now I need it. Seeing Sonia, a literal princess, drop her ruse and find out that she was the one who caused everything that the characters went though would be really interesting. I’d also love to see how Gundham and Kazuichi react to it.

Shuichi - I would love to see more of him acting like in his pre-game video. But as a mastermind. Because. I just want to.

Honestly, I would love to see every character as a mastermind. It’s so interesting and so cool and I want to know exactly what they would do and how they would do it and how every little detail would work out.

Sorry for the long answers, and thank you so much for the questions ahHH!!

#asks

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amma292005 · 5 years ago

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The wild blossom- Part 1 - Just the beginning

Hey,the quarantine thing is getting to me . Decided to write again. But I'm a bit rusty soo enjoy:)) "Just a few more hours and you would be back in Aldonia. It sent chills down your spine knowing you hadn't been home for about 13 years. Memories start to flood your mind. From your first horse back ride when you were only 5 years old to the pillow fights with Celeste in your room. Up until the very night you were told your parents were dead. You could clearly remember as three days later you had to leave everything, everyone , Celeste, Abuela. You moved to the States with the hope that you'd forget the tragedy back at home. As you left the palace , leaving that part of you, the princess, the sole heir to the throne of Aldonia hoping for a new life. You had fun . You are now a pediatrician with a successful career in the US but here you are on the royal jet back home. At least , you knew your grandmother was well. Your train of thoughts being interrupted as the pilot announced your arrival. As you looked down the feeling of euphoria and pain overwhelms you. How good it felt to be back" "Why do you have your hands in your pockets like you've stolen another bagel?" You heard suddenly followed by a snicker . You knew that laugh. "Celeste!" You scream running to meet your childhood friend and personal hand maid. "Feels great to be back doesn't it chica? She asks with tears streaming down her cheeks. You nodded , whilst hugging her. " Ai, let me go you're gonna choke me "she says laughing. Sorry can't let yo go you reply. " Addison Maria Antoinette de la Cruz! I thought you came back to see me! You grandma wails behind you. You quickly turn to embrace her saying don't worry Abuela I haven't forgotten about you. You both share a ramble of words which was muffled by tears but you knew she was just as excited to see you as you were to see her." How long has it been,24 years ago you were just a baby and now you're a grown woman" ,she says laughing. "And you haven't aged a bit ",you say smirking. "You naughty girl", she says laughing. "C'mon let's get you home". You and Celeste with your grandma head towards the royal limousine. It's been 3 months since you arrived. You haven't forgotten a thing you were taught in the earliest stages of your life but you were a bit shaky but now, now you've gotten the hang of the princess thing again. But you did not want to wake up this morning because you'd spent the past day planning a surprise birthday for Celeste. You prayed that today was going to be a good day but you kept getting the gut feeling that the day would not go as planned. If only you knew you were right " Excuse me your highness but you said it yourself, she's 24!. Most heirs get married at 21. She's overdue!" " I know but , is this gonna sit well with her ? Addie(the nickname almost everyone in the palace calls you by) can be very stubborn -hearted just like her head strong father. You and I know she won't agree to an arranged marriage! " "But it's for the sake of the kingdom. The kingdom of Empardia is very strong and with them as allies we'd be much safer and secure " he tries to convince your grandmother. "And this is the life of my granddaughter we are arguing about!" She shoots back. "I understand but this offer is from Empardia itself. Plus your granddaughter will be in good hands. After all aren't the King and Queen of Empardia good friends of Their majesties King Reindolph and Queen Deanna , may their souls rest in perfect peace,?" " I do suppose you're right then. Send a word back to the that we agree to this alliance. But I must speak to Addison first." "As you wish, long live Queen Amelia" "Dammit !" ,You mutter. The stupid clock! why did it have to wake you up so early. Wait, today's Celeste's birthday. So many things to do before she arrives at the palace. "Alright, up we go then!", You say, half wishing you could just flop back unto the bed. " Addison, we need to talk." You whisper " what is it now again, another foot rub or spilt tea" under your breath , only to receive an I beg your pardon! . "Listen, there is something important I have to tell you , freshen up and meet me in the throne room" ___________________________ "This is absurd , this is the 21st century for Christ's sake!" you shout, angrily. I will not have you raise your voice at me. I am the Queen, and my word is final, do you get that Antoinette!. So, it was Antoinette now, she only uses that name when she is serious and she seemed to be, now. "You are getting married to Prince Harry Edward Styles of Empardia and I do not want to hear a single word of objection from you. Do I make my self clear?" "Yes, my Queen", you answer ,mortified." You may leave now". You feel like hitting yourself against a wall and never waking up as you choked on tears on the way to your room, with Celeste's party forgotten. Deep down the Queen regretted her decision but there was nothing she could do. Celeste, seeing you half running and walking into your room. You tell her everything as she strokes her hand through your thick black hair. "What am I gonna do?" You ask her. "I don't know" she replies, sadly. And this was just the beginning. Please send me your views on it. Requests and suggestions are welcomed. Just ask me if you want a part two. Thanks and enjoy:))) #harry styles imagines #harry styles au #harry styles smut

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shsldepressedlesbian · 5 years ago

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no one asked but here danganronpa fantasy au that was made in my early days of the fandom and is thus outdated and was made with mostly only the drv3 cast in mind. i updated it a little for the public tho haa

Plot: ok so basically kaede is a princess and she befriends this shapeshifter named shuichi and sorta assigns him as her advisor and their best friends. then two weeks before her crowning she gets kidnapped and shuichi goes off to look for her in time for her to be queen. and he meets the rest of the cast and finds her and everyone is happy

Kaede: Princess. Is very skilled in many different musical types, but piano is her main. Kidnapped from her palace. Shuichi's best friend.

Shuichi: Shapeshifter(he tries to keep this a secret). Orphaned as a child and stumbled into the castle's gardens, where he met Kaede. Searching for her after her disappearance so she can become queen in time.

Kaito: A wannabe adventurer who offers to accompany Shuichi on the road to find Kaede. Also wishes to one day be able to take his adventuring to the sky. Use to be the assistant of an astronomer, before leaving to make his own fortune. Says he's heard rumors about someone who has a map to where the gang who kidnapped Kaede resides. Ryoma was one of his former idols.

Kokichi: A thief and a leader of a gang of bandits. After ending up getting caught while trying to steal from their wagon, he offers to join them and help find Kaede(with plans to rob them and steal their wagon and horses, but only ends up growing closer to them and reconsidering stealing from them cause "huh that prize for finding the queen is a lot more than what these losers probably have").

Maki: An assassin for hire who runs into the trio by random. Also it just so happens that her next target is Kokichi. Kaito saves Kokichi's ass and Shuichi offers to outpay the bounty on Kokichi's head-wait did someone seriously offer that much Kokichi what the hell did you do to piss someone off that much-he then offers that if Maki were to travel with the three of them for a short while, then they could stop by the Akamatsu kingdom and she could get her gold. Maki just wants to kill Kokichi and go, but Kaito begins insisting she comes with them("cmon just cause your an assassin doesnt mean you have to be edgy all the time")and this does really annoy Maki, but eh fine she'll come with them for a day or two, but if she doesn't that money she'll go back to her original plan. And thus the four is complete.

Kiyo: A traveling anthropologist who is secretly a vampire. In his wishes to continue traveling after his turning, he wears much clothing to protect him from the sun, which gives him a creepy appearance. He runs into the four after someone ends up "accidentally" letting the horses go, and offers to give them a ride to meet Rantaro he can guide him to the town. Then mysteriously disappears after dropping a few facts about certain cultures. Even then he appears randomly ever so often. He also has an interest in seances and always observes specialists in the subjects when the chance arrives. His horse, who he's nicknamed "Shiso", is very precious to him, as it is the child of his now deceased older sister's former horse. He also occasionally travels with Rantaro.

Rantaro: A true adventurer who has been through so many dangerous encounters he has become very chill when facing danger. He knows a lot of things about the wild and creature's preferences, though he isn't a walking fact machine. Meets the four and agrees to guide them after hearing they've met Kiyo. Is also looking for his sisters, who have disappeared whilst traveling with him.

Angie: A siren who can change into human when on land. Is very dedicated to the siren sea god. She attempts to use her voice to lure the trio into her cult(of course, doing so would require them to get into the water and drown), but is interrupted by Tenko who scares her off.

Himiko: A young witch who also deems herself a mage. She is severely underestimated due to her lazy nature and size. She gets gravely annoyed when people accuse her of being a fake, and wishes for everyone to see herself as a mage. She calls Tenko her familiar who she turned into a human(the ways of how are not mentioned). When the three arrive, she uses her cauldron to help them locate where the person-who-has-the-map is(she couldn't make out what they looked like or who they were, but hey, she got the town at least).

Tenko: A girl who had once been training to be a knight put was put under a warlock's curse that turned her into a frog, unless she had a true love's kiss. Frog Tenko fell in love almost immediately when she first saw Himiko, and began following her, hoping to one day be able to see if she could break the curse. Himiko first thought of the frog as annoying, but then it began helping her out, and she grew weirdly attached to it, then decided to craft a familiarbond with her, which required at least a kiss on the head. Surprise surprise, Himiko broke Tenko's curse. And Tenko also kept the perks of being a familiar. Tenko has a very obvious crush on Himiko that she denies to have, but is very loyal to her and has promised to protect her and stay by her side until their last days. Due to being a familiar, she has limited magic that can become more powerful the more closer she is to Himiko- and Himiko can also channel magic through her. Tenko, due to a warlock having been the one who put the curse on her and her old teacher feeding her biased views, has a dislike for males, and only rescued the trio because she hated seeing Angie succeeding, and only brought them to Himiko after Shuichi offered to pay a good amount of gold to see her.

Ryoma: A former adventurer, who is now an outlaw since he joined the gang who stole Kaede. However, he also betrayed this gang a long while ago, and so now he is both hunted down by the gang and guards of most kingdoms. He resides hidden away, though by now he has no desire to continue living. He is also the one to have the map to the gang's hideaway, and is the one to give it to Kaito.

Kirumi: The secret former queen of the Tojo kingdom, who ran away after being forced into a loveless marriage. She now works as one of Kaede's best maids, and offers advice. She also tries to track down where Kaede could be held unbeknownst to Shuichi, and is the one to save the four.

Kiibo: A walking build of gears with a touch of magic, he was formerly Miu's first attempt at a walking person. Then, the very next day, almost by magic, he acquired a personality of his own, the ability to speak, and was basically a human- well, sure, he was still made of wood, iron, and gears, but that doesn't change anything, right? He resides in a village with his inventor, who is Miu, as mentioned before. He wishes to one day be able to leave the village and go on his own journey, but for now, he lives peacefully, trying to be seen as just the same as any other normal human.

Miu: An inventor and an idol in her village. She is the reason her village may be the most technologically advanced in the kingdom. She makes plenty of money off of her inventions. Of course, if people were to actually meet her, they would find that she really doesn't act like the inventor people think she is. She lives in her 'lab' in the center of her village, with her companion Kiibo. Has a deep running rivalry with Kokichi, and was actually the one who paid Maki to track him down and kill him.

Gonta: Half human, half beast, all around gentleman. He was abandoned in a forest and was raised by animals and monsters. He has since moved into a village that was much more welcome to him. He wishes to one day become a knight, in order to prove his gentlemenness.

Tsumugi: A very plain and simple tailor whose clothes are much more appealing to look at then herself. Or, at least, that is what people think she is. In reality, she is the leader of the gang who kidnapped Kaede, and wishes for nothing but wealth. She uses her clothing shop as a cover and extra way to make gold, and at the end she kidnaps the four, only to be foiled.

Other Characters:

Makoto: A friendly baker who happens to get sucked into adventures from time to time. Has a curse/gift of both bad luck and good luck. Also married to Kyoko(and maybe Prince Togami).

Kyoko: A very well respected investigator who is rumored to be able to take any case. An enemy of thieving gangs. Married to Makoto(and maybe Prince Togami).

Byakuya: A snobby prince who is due to take his kingdom's throne. However, he refuses to get married until he is crowned(there is a rumor that he is engaged in a poly relationship with the investigator Kyoko and her husband. neither of them have confirmed nor denied this).

Toko/Genocider Syo: A half demon writer who's demon side is a serial killer by the name of Genocider Syo. Use to serve Byakuya and had an intense infatuation for him, before meeting Komaru and going on an adventure with her(more explained in Komaru's section), and eventually falling in love with her, eventually quitting her old job to become a writer.

Aoi: A friendly mermaid with an intense craving for human treats. Is dating Sakura.

Sakura: The head knight of a certain kingdom. Very just. Is dating Aoi.

Celeste: A vampire who gambles for money and blood. Has her own mansion of vampire butlers.

Kiyotaka: A traveling ranger whose duty is to right all the wrongs of this world. May or may not possess some sort of supernatural powers. Also may or may not be in a romantic relationship with Mondo.

Mondo: A feared bandit(who is also a werewolf)who is the leader of his own gang, with black horses being their symbol(and also their form of transportation). Use to challenge Kiyotaka often and considered him a rival, but now their quite close "bros"(who may or may not have romantic feelings for each other).

Chihiro: A shy potionbrewer. They sell things such as the healing potions they make, though their quick to give for free to people who need it. However, isn't gullible. Surprisingly on good terms with Mondo and Kiyotaka, being that they once rescued Mondo and nursed him back to health.

Hagakure: A(very limited)psychic who has probably sold his soul to a demon for money. Is in way too much debt with too many bandit gangs. His friends wonder how he's still alive. Either way, he travels around telling fortunes to make money.

Leon: An archer who wishes to be anything but an archer. He has a wish of becoming a bard, as far as that wish may be. Has been rescued from siren attacks too many times to count.

Sayaka: A siren who doesn't have the same mentality as the other sirens, and doesn't actually believe in or pray to the sea god. However, she still has a mavolvent side, and enjoys luring men to their doom. But it is possible to befriend her. She and Makoto have known each other since childhood and are very close friends.

Hifumi: A traveling scribe with an interest in drawings of fictional woman. Has been rumored to be an assistant of Celeste.

Junko: The head queen of the chaotic level demons. Wishes for nothing but to break despair to everyone. Grew up with Mukuro as sisters, but isn't actually related to her by blood.

Mukuro: A shapeshifter who takes many forms. Has been a knight in many armies and is very skilled with weapons. She and Junko were both abandoned orphans who ended growing up with each other as sisters. Is also Junko's 'eyes upstairs'. Has managed to grow attached to Makoto after observing him, and often ends up rescuing him without his knowledge.

Hajime: A demon hunter who is half demon himself(his half demon side being nicknamed Izuru Kamukura, and being a skillful level of demon). Only kills demons who he considers actual threats. Surprisingly drinking barmates with Fuyuhiko and Kazuchi. Is currently reluctantly allowing Nagito to stay with him(may or may not actually have romantic feelings for him). Use to be in love with Chiaki, until she peacefully rejected him.

Nagito: A demon who many believe to be in the chaotic level, but is actually just a lowly luck demon(a very severe luck demon to be exact). Brings despair wherever he goes, though he yearns for nothing but the hope to bring him to the end. Grew very quickly attached to Hajime after observing him for a few days after he spared him, and believes that he will be the hope that will eventually kill him- but as annoying as he may be, Hajime doesn't wish to kill him off. Very self-degrading.

Chiaki: A very sleepy and peaceful witch, who people come to for advice. She enjoys controlling stick figures in video game styles. Close childhood friend of Hajime.

Kazuchi: An inventor who dreams of one day being accepted as the private inventor to Princess Sonia, his everlasting crush. His inventions are amazing, but underlooked. He sold his soul to a demon once in order to make his brown hair pink and to have his sight back so he didn't have to wear glasses. Lucky for him, Hajime then slayed that demon, and now he considers the both of them soulfriends(hajime has his regrets). He spends more time with Gundham, who he battles for Sonia's affections, rather then trying to chill with Sonia herself(though to be fair she doesnt let him get that close).

Gundham: A demon who can bend the will of animals to his own use, aided by his destructive Four Dark Devas of Destruction. His name is feared across the land, and he wishes for nothing but to instill fear into the hearts of many. Until he met Princess Sonia, who he spends an awful lot of time with and seems to have a soft spot for her. He can be found making his plans to destroy villages, hanging out with Sonia, or arguing with Kazuchi.

Sonia: A princess who is invested in learning about demons and summonings. Often travels around in order to observe such things, and a ritual was actually where she met Gundham, who she became close friends with.

Fuyuhiko: The leader of one of the most powerful gangs in the continent. Lost his eye in a barfight. Though he's usually a mean and rough guy, he has a soft spot for his 'allies'(mainly Kazuchi and Hajime)and his personal bodyguard, Peko. He thinks of Peko as more than a tool, and wants her to see that.

Peko: Once upon a time, a group of humans with super senses made an arrangement with the gang that Fuyuhiko now runs. The gang would help them out and leave them alone while supplying them with some money every month, and they would give to them one of their own young to each of the current gang leader's children. Peko was given to Fuyuhiko when she was just a baby. The two grew up alongside each other, but never as equals. She was trained to be nothing but a weapon. A protector. Because of this, she has grown awfully monotone. But, she has a soft spot for fluffy animals, though they do not have a soft spot for her.

Mikan: A fallen angel who fell when she met Junko, the so called leader of the powerful side of demons, and became infatuated by her. Now serves alongside Junko, in a not very healthy relationship. Hopefully she'll break free one day...

Ibuki: A half beast who can transform from a colorful gem dragon to a more humanlike form. She's very rambunctious and causes disaster without meaning to. Loud and vocal.

Twogami: A double agent shapeshifter who goes by many identities, so many in fact that they don't even actually know who they themselves are. However, they have a strong sense of leadership and is a surprisingly nice guy. Actually takes Byakuya's role for amount of times so the original Byakuya can sneak out and meet with Makoto and Kyoko.

Mahiru: An explorer who likes to take pictures of every place she sees. Also is known to help people out whenever she passes through a village. Met Hiyoko when the short girl defended her from a bar creep. Has a friend from home that she occasionally travels with by the name of Sato.

Hiyoko: A dancer who travels a lot, going from bar to bar. She doesn't really like it, considering how many 'creeps' are there, but it makes money for her and her dad, who she cares about a lot. Defended Mahiru from a creep and grew attached to her, and insists that she come visit her whenever she happens through a town that Hiyoko is performing in. May have some feelings for her, but whether their one-sided or not is still to be seen.

Akane: A harpy who is almost always hungry, and can usually be found hunting for meat. A little dimwitted and has a sense of recklessness. Close allies with Nekomaru.

Nekomaru: A half beast who can turn into a stone beast. Is very good at pumping people up, and is also very loud. Close allies with Akane.

Teruteru: A chef who runs a popular restaurant with his mother. A little perverted and almost definitely has summoned a Succubus for a one night stand before.

#pineapple writes #danganronpa #danganronpa au #dr1 #drthh #drv3 #sdr2

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sunsetscurving · 5 years ago

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honey, you should see me in a crown [modern royalty AU]

CHAPTER 7 || ao3 link

Lucas Lallemant, crown prince and heir to the throne, never needed someone to protect him. He never needed someone to protect him until the day he nearly got stabbed by an assassin.

Now he has to deal with an annoying bodyguard named Eliott Demaury who is, to the chagrin of Lucas, fucking handsome too.

As if his life hasn‘t been difficult enough already.

Over the next two weeks, nightly walks became their thing. Lucas didn’t bother to hide his little escapes from Eliott anymore, he wanted his bodyguard to know that he left the castle for some precious moments of freedom outside the castle. And if he wasn’t allowed to do this alone, he would drag Eliott with him gladly.

And Eliott seemed to be delighted by it too.

Lucas talked most of the time in the beginning but slowly but surely, something like a friendship developed between them. Eliott opened up, told Lucas about his big brother and how much he wished that he could see him more often. But he was in the army and Eliott was afraid at every waking hour for his big brother to whom he looked up to so much.

“Jacques was one of the reasons why I wanted to be a bodyguard in the first place”, told Eliott Lucas on one of their nightly walks, “I… I also wanted to be brave. To do something that could maybe save a life. That could maybe make an impact how history is written. And although I wouldn’t be the spotlight of this history, I wanted to be part of it, at least…”

And in this moment, Lucas fell in love.

He didn’t want to admit it but the feelings for Eliott had developed more and more over their walks in the middle of the night, where just him and Eliott seemed to be on this planet, where time stood still and only the two of them were moving, two young men who couldn’t be more different from each other.

Lucas had stopped in his tracks and turned around to Eliott after he told him all of this and reacting without thinking, he took hold of Eliott’s hand, the other one looking deeply into Lucas’ ocean-blue eyes.

“You will be in the spotlight. You already are. For me, at least”, Lucas had whispered and Eliott’s lips formed slowly into a smile.

After this night, things were different.

Lucas had the feeling that not only he felt different, that not only he was surer of his feelings but also Eliott. Lucas had the feeling that Eliott actually sought Lucas out to be near him, to spend time with him and not only because his job description said so. And for the first time, Lucas not only felt like a prince but he felt seen. He felt like Eliott could look behind the royal mask of him, that he genuinely cared about Lucas and what he thought and how he felt. Eliott was more than a bodyguard for Lucas after this faithful night where Eliott opened up to him.

He was maybe even more than a friend.

And not only Lucas was happy about this development: Cece was probably the one who profited the most from Lucas’ and Eliott’s upgraded friendship – she had now two people to have a tea party with and Eliott’s laugh whenever they were together with Cece was his highlight of every single day. Eliott seemed to shine brighter than the first weeks of his stay in the castle and Lucas often told himself that maybe he was the reason for his bright smile.

At least he hoped so.

“So, what are you going to do in your free time without the little brat aka me to protect?”

Lucas grinned from the couch where he lay lazily, looking over to Eliott who lounged in a comfortable chair, his tie lose and his suit jacket over the arm rest. This was Lucas’ favourite sight of Eliott – him being relaxed, forgetting about his job for a moment and the both of them just being boys, joking around and laughing.

Eliott laughed and leaned his head back, considering Lucas’ question. Eliott would leave for a little holiday with his parents and his brother tomorrow and Lucas would miss him terribly. He would get some old guard at his side for these few days.

“I’ll have so fucking much time without you commanding me around the whole day”, said Eliott with a grin eventually and Lucas sat up, playful indignation on his face.

“How dare you to speak to your prince like this?”, said Lucas with a played serious tone and Eliott tried to hide the smile on his lips, playing along with Lucas and his little game which he loved to play. All the formalities between them were forgotten whenever they were alone and this was Lucas’ favourite thing about it all – feeling normal without being reminded that he will inherit the throne of his country soon.

“Oh, I beg your pardon, your highness. Please don’t hang me in front of the whole court!”

Lucas laughed and leaned back again, turning his head and tried to memorise Eliott’s face and his laugh so that he could replay it whenever he wanted when Eliott wasn’t around. It was strange how accustomed you could become to someone in such a short time.

“No, but seriously. I will have a lot time to read a book, to talk with my brother till the morning hours, updating each other on the life of the other one and just… enjoy some family time.”

Lucas smiled and nodded, looking at the ceiling now. He didn’t know when he had read the last book or when he had the last family centred holiday and just as Eliott talked about all of this, he realized that he kind of missed it.

“And you?”

Eliott’s voice dragged Lucas out of his thoughts and he looked at Eliott again.

“And me?”

“What will you do without me?”

This is actually a very good question.

“Oh, you know. The princely duties, the masquerade—”

Lucas halted and sat up, looking directly into Eliott’s irritatingly beautiful eyes.

“You’ll be back for the masquerade, right?”

“I’m trying my best.”

“Your best?”

“I’m not sure yet, I—”

“Please, Eliott.”

Lucas stood up now, walking over to Eliott and sitting down on his armrest. They were so close now that Lucas could feel the heat of Eliott’s body radiating off him and Lucas was not sure if the closeness between them was so good right now because Lucas’ thoughts drifted off into a dangerous direction.

“Promise me, that you’ll be there. I cannot do this without you.”

This was another fact that came with their bonding: Lucas kind of felt unsafe without Eliott by his side. Eliott had been there for nearly a month now, always a shadow behind Lucas or next to him, his presence always there and making Lucas feel safe. Safer than in weeks. He knew that no danger could reach him with Eliott by his side. The masquerade would be guarded to the teeth but the anxiety which came with such a big event could only be calmed by Eliott or his little sister.

It’s unbelievable how much I need him.

Eliott looked up to Lucas and laid a hand on Lucas’.

“I’m trying. I really will. Okay?”

Eliott smiled and Lucas couldn’t resist this smile.

“Okay.”

It was the evening of the masquerade and Lucas was walking around in his room like a caged tiger.

“Your highness, would you please stand still for a moment?”, asked his dresser and he couldn’t blame the slightly annoyed undertone in her voice. He had been acting like this for the past few hours and when Lucas looked out and saw how many guests already spilled into the castle, he felt sick.

Eliott wasn’t here.

“Could I—Could I have five minutes, please?”

The dresser nodded with a sigh and curtsied.

“But we really need to hurry then, your highness.”

“I know. I’m sorry.”

And with this, the dresser left his room. Lucas pulled out his phone and opened the chat between him and Eliott.

lucallemant: where tf are you?

lucallemant: eliott pls

lucallemant: I need you

srodulv: I’m sorry, I cannot make it

Lucas stared at the display, his eyes suddenly burning.

lucallemant: what

srodulv: my flight was cancelled and the next one is leaving tomorrow morning

lucallemant: you’re kidding me, get your ass here

srodulv: I’m not kidding. Please forgive me.

He was not kidding. Lucas could feel it. And although he shouldn’t be angry at Eliott, he was. Eliott knew how unsafe Lucas felt without him and Lucas had hoped that he at least could sneak away with Eliott and maybe dance in secret with him and—

Lucas took a deep breath and looked into the long mirror in front of him.

“I am Prince Lucas Charles Louis Alexandre Lallemant. And I can do everything.”

He would smile tonight. He would dance and he would have fun.

Lucas put on his mask, a delicate half-faced thing in black covered with velvet.

And he wouldn’t think about Eliott.

A servant was booming the golden stick against the polished marble floor and thousand of masked faces turned around to that sound. The big hall was decorated with white flowers, the queen’s favourites, and the air smelled like candles, sweet honey from the buffet and… mystery.

“Your majesty, King Alexandre Antoine Raphael Lallemant, his wife, Queen Adalene Celeste Claudette Lallemant, their daughter Princess Cecille Estelle Camille Lallemant and their son, Prince Lucas Charles Louis Alexandre Lallemant.”

Lucas automatically straightened as his name was called into the room and echoed back against the high walls. His father and his mother started to move and so did Lucas and Cece. They floated down the stairs and into the crowd of aristocracy and royalty. Lucas actually hated the silence whenever they entered a room, hated the eyes of so many people on him and the feeling of tripping every second. With Eliott by his side, he would feel surer, better.

You didn’t want to think about him tonight. You survived so long on your own. You can also do it again for one night.

And finally, the music was setting in again and the murmuring of people filled the room. His parents were off to some important people and Lucas took a deep breath. He was kind of glad for all the masks around him, no one could have seen the panic in his eyes and he was very happy about this.

“I really like your mask, Lulu.”

Lucas nearly forgot about his little sister next to him but as she addressed him, a smile spread on his lips. He kneeled down to be on eye-level with her. Today, she was wearing a lilac dress with puffy sleeves and a little tiara was seated on the curls of her blonde locks. She was wearing a tiny fragile mask which only covered the upper half of her face and she looked absolutely adorable. She wasn’t allowed to be that long on the ball but she had begged their mum so long till she agreed to let her go, at least for two hours.

“And I like yours, little princess. You look stunning tonight.”

Cece beamed at Lucas’ words.

“And you look very good, too.”

Lucas knew that Cece meant everything she said and it made him happy to hear his little sister say that. But, today, he had to admit that he really do looked good. He was wearing a burgundy coloured suit which was only made for him and therefor fitted him perfectly. The black mask was colour-coordinated to his black tie and although the outfit was quite simple, it did his effect as Lucas realized that some young women, and young men, turned their head towards him, maybe waiting for Lucas to come over or waiting for the perfect moment to ask him out for a dance.

“Okay, little one”, said Lucas now and turned to look at Cece again. He poked her in the chest, “Don’t eat too much cake, don’t trip on the dresses of other women and please, don’t spill any limo on the marble floor. Mum and dad would be furious.”

Cece giggled and nodded.

“Okay, gotcha.”

And with that, she disappeared between all the people and Lucas lost sight of her. A smile was still playing around his lips and his thoughts slowly drifted back to Eliott, as suddenly something caught his attention in the corner of his eyes.

He turned around and froze.

Someone was coming late and that someone had the attention of the whole court.

Which maybe could be connected to how fucking stunning he looked.

He was wearing a midnight blue suit and a mask which covered his eyes and left his full and smooth lips open where a little smirk was plastered. He was walking down the stairs with the grace of a king and he was wearing a little cape, attached to his suit and coloured in the same midnight blue. His mask, in stark contrast, was white.

And Lucas was totally mesmerized.

He gaped at him with all the others who started to murmur who this could be and why he was late and where he got that exclusive suit. Lucas tore his gaze away for a moment and looked for his parents and Cece but he couldn’t find them.

And because no one dared to walk over to him, Lucas used his status and his chance to weave through the crowd till he stood in front of the stranger. The taller boy sank into an elegant bow and Lucas’ heart automatically started to beat faster.

Which it actually only did around Eliott.

“Your highness”, said the young man quietly and Lucas motioned him to stand up again so he could get lost in his eyes. But the shadow of his mask kind of hid the real colour and Lucas could only see the slight gleam in them. But that was enough for him now.

“With whom I’m having the pleasure to meet with on this masquerade?”, asked Lucas quietly, his voice slightly hoarse. He had the feeling that every single eye pair where on them, even the music had stopped, but the funniest thing was: He didn’t care right now. He suddenly felt sure and safe again and that only because this breath-taking stranger walked into this masquerade and suddenly made Lucas’ evening far more interesting.

The stranger leaned closer to Lucas and Lucas stood still, waiting.

“If I’m telling you my name, then the mystery would be solved and this isn’t the sense of a masquerade, right?”

Lucas smirked and looked into the eyes of the other one while nodding.

“That’s true”, said Lucas while slowly holding out his hand, “Would you dance with me?”

The stranger laid his hand into Lucas’ own and Lucas felt a jolt go through his body, the music was silently playing again in the background.

“It would be a pleasure.”

And so Lucas led them both in the middle of the room and they danced.

And danced.

Lucas lost count of how many dances he only did with him. Anyone else who wanted to dance with him was met with an excuse so that Lucas could dance another round with the stranger. They didn’t talk much but that was actually not necessary in the first place. Their touches and their gazes spoke more than thousand words. Lucas was nearly forced by his dad to dance with some other people but he eventually always came back to his mysterious stranger.

As the night wore on and the first people already left, Lucas saw his chance to be alone with him. He took hold of his hand and pulled him out of the hall, into the hallway and towards one of their hundred balconies. Lucas opened the doors and was met with fresh night air. He breathed the air in and looked over his shoulder, smiling at the stranger and indicating him to follow him. Lucas leaned against the balcony parapet, looking down over the palace garden where he took so many walks with Eliott and…

No, he wouldn’t think about Eliott again.

Not when he was here with a beautiful stranger who seemed to be interested in him. And who would maybe be more available to him than Eliott.

“The view his breath-taking”, said the stranger silently now and Lucas watched him from the side, his strong jaw and his profile. He wondered if he was some duke or some lord or even a prince from another country. But his French was perfect, without any accent. He wouldn’t solve this mystery tonight but he was determined to solve it any other day.

“Yeah, it is… I often come here to take a breath between some nightly events here in the castle.”

“I can relate. It must be hard for you.”

Lucas turned around now, leaning against the parapet with his back now and watched the other one carefully.

“Sometimes. But then there are nights like tonight where…”

Lucas had stopped and the other one, of course, realized that.

“Where?”, asked the stranger and his gaze was now landing on Lucas. Lucas bit his lip and couldn’t tore away his gaze from the man in front of him who was literally dipped into the moonlight from above.

“Where I’m meeting special people. Like you”, said Lucas and his voice got quieter with every word till his voice was barely audible, barely a whisper.

The other one started to smile and took another step towards Lucas till he was nearly pressed again the parapet and the tall man in front of him.

“Like me…?”

“Like you…”

Lucas couldn’t calm down his beating heart. He usually was someone who thought a lot about things before doing them. But right now… He only wanted to do one thing. He had the feeling to know this man, to know his secrets and his dreams although Lucas didn’t even know his name. But something about him was achingly familiar.

He felt good around him.

Like he only felt with Eliott.

Lucas tiptoed, his eyes on the lips of the other one.

His heart was nearly jumping out of his chest and he could feel the breath of the stranger on his lips and then their lips nearly brushed and—

“I’m sorry.”

Lucas’ eyes snapped open and he saw how the other one was withdrawing from Lucas, disappearing slowly but surely into the darkness of the hallway, “You deserve better.”

And suddenly, he was gone.

Lucas was frozen but after some seconds, he realized what had happened. He was gone and when Lucas wouldn’t chase after him right now, he would never know his name and never see him again.

“Wait!”, Lucas called out and stumbled after him.

But the hallway was empty.

As if nothing happened.

Lucas blinked, suddenly feeling dizzy.

Maybe none of this happened.

Maybe everything had been a dream.

But if so, it had been a wonderful one.

#skam france #lucas lallemant #eliott demaury #skam france fanfic #skam france fanfiction #elu fic #elucrownfanfiction #omg yes a new chapter pls dont let it flop ily all

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mrs-lockley · 4 years ago

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OKAY CELESTE I HAVE A LOT OF QUESTIONS: 1 & 2 for True to your Heart 9 for real people 5 & 11 for Wait for Me 👀 answer as many or as few as you want 💙

Hello Freya! 💙 I will do my best!

True to Your Heart

1: What inspired you to write the fic this way?

Tbh, I can’t quite remember anymore! I know I still have to finish the series (writer’s block bit my butt) but I remember I wanted to write a Disney AU for Poe. It’s also a bit of a shameless self-insert because Mulan is my favorite princess and I’m Asian, but also?? I think it was because one of my friends was teasing me for having a type for generals because of my childhood crush on General Li Shang, and then I remembered ... Poe is NOW a General 👀 So I thought ... why not make a Mulan AU?

2: What scene did you first put down?

I still have the outline and only have Part 1 written, but the first scene that came to my head when I created this au was BB8 as Mushu! I know BB8 is Poe’s droid, but I had this cute image of BB8 being your droid (well, technically your sister’s droid) and being sassy and looking out for you. I just thought it was very fitting, and I giggled at the thought of BB8 being protective and threatening some boys if they got too close to you while you were on base. 🙈

More under the cut!

Like Real People Do

9: Were there any alternate versions of this fic?

To be honest, there really wasn’t! This one just came clear to me; I was actually having some bad flashbacks and was listening to Hozier when this idea came to me. I started writing it and pretty much finished it in like, a day or two.

It’s another shameless self-insert, but so far, it’s been my most popular fic. I have a soft spot for it, and it’s also my first reader insert fic as well. I think I shouldn’t feel guilty about writing it if so many people like it, and sometimes when I’m sad I come back to it because wow, I can’t believe I wrote that, you know? The main goal I had in writing the fic was much like how Hozier described it; just kiss, and not ask about the skeletons until you’re ready. it’s one of my favorite Hozier songs and it’s just so soft, and I wanted to encapsulate that and the words just poured out of me.

Maybe I should listen to Hozier more when I write

Wait for Me

5: What part was hardest to write?

To be honest, all of it! I’m a perfectionist and wanted it to be perfect, I wanted it to feel like a Greek tragedy. I wanted my readers to feel the tragedy, the emotions. It took me 2 months to write it, but I poured every emotion I had into it. I was yearning, pining, and hurting while writing it. I wanted to create a vivid image to haunt people with the emotions to linger after, just like any other tragedy. I think what was most difficult for me was that we already know how the tragedy goes, but I also wanted to make it my own as well. I didn’t want it to be an exact copy of the myth, nor a copy of the Broadway play Hadestown, either. I wanted to add my own spin to it while sticking to the original source, but most importantly, I wanted it to drip with emotions and images and longing that it would haunt you for years.

11: What do you like best about this fic?

Out of my limited number of fics, I have to say next to Like Real People Do, this one is my favorite. I’m a little bummed that I put so much heart into it that it’s my lowest viewed fic (in terms of notes), because I’m actually proud with how it turned out. I poured everything into it; the emotions, the imagery, the longing.

To be honest, this one was my most strategic fic because I purposely used specific symbols and lines to foreshadow certain things.

White lilies

White lilies were mentioned several times throughout the fic, and I intentionally put it in my mooboard as well. In Hadestown, a red carnation/rose was used, but for my fic, I used white lilies for what they symbolized. White lilies are typically used in funerals to symbolize rebirth, commitment, and sympathy. Particularly from Asian cultures, I’ve always worn white to funerals because of the symbol of rebirth, and not black for mourning or sympathy.

White lilies were first mentioned when you and Llewyn visited Mike at his grave, and Llewyn placed the lilies at his grave. There, lilies symbolized death because they are a common funeral flower.

The second time white lilies were mentioned was when Llewyn found you in the Underworld in a field of lilies. There, lilies could either symbolize death, or rebirth if Llewyn were to succeed in leading you out of the Underworld. I also alluded to the song, Flowers, in Hadestown, where Eurydice was singing to Orpheus to find her in the Underworld. I used that same image of you singing to Llewyn for him to find you.

If I had wings like Norah’s dove, I’d fly the river to the one I love

This is the first instance I used to foreshadow Llewyn finding you in the Underworld when you first met him singing at the Gaslight. I also wanted to incorporate some of the original songs form the movie as well, and I think Fare Thee Well could also be used to foreshadow Llewyn bidding you goodbye in the Underworld. While you were in a field of lilies, Llewyn found you on the other side of the River Styx, and I alluded that he would “fly” the river to find you, the one he loves.

So show us a bird flying high above, life ain’t worth living without the one you love…

Another instance of foreshadowing. Here, I mentioned having wings towards the end where Llewyn was climbing out of the Underworld, wishing he had nothing but wings to pull you out. And to hint ... he couldn’t live without you.

OOP this got long, but thank you so much for sending this ask Freya 🥺 I really do appreciate it!

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jess-the-vampire · 6 years ago

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Nora is bi ???! I’m so happy I like her more !! This is my favourite character in your AU!

some of my ocs have official sexualities, some don’t,

Nora’s one of the few that does have one, alongside landon, celeste, ect

The funny thing is she’s not intended to have crushes on judas or sky, she’s supposed to be a shy princess who secretly admires them and wishes to be like them and hang out with them.

But some people have stated she kinda seems like she might be into them so even though i can’t really confirm that’s the case, it’s VERY fun to imagine that might be a reason she likes them so much.

Like you got angel, who respects sky and jude and they all care about each other even though they get sick of the other getting in their way. (Angel’s a pain but sky and judas kinda still want him to do better and make better choices for his people though they understand where he’s coming from (Especially judas, as a fellow monster) )

You have loki who mostly just is desperate for friends he follows them everywhere and sorta butts into their lives, but is so bad at talking to them he turns sky completely off and even sometimes gets to jude. (Not to mention he also may have some issues cause of his parents and since they are creatures who DO approve of judas, loki may just want judas around to make him feel more special to his family).

And then you have nora who was always too shy to talk to them, was never allowed much near them since her folks were in fear of her getting hurt considering that tended to be a thing with them. Plus monsters were still new to society and there’s a lingering fear something bad could happen to her, so she wasn’t allowed to leave their sight much.

But as they say, you forbid your child to do something so much, they get more tempted to actually do it. Nora is too used to not talking to them or spending time with them but she wants to, even if she has a hard time doing it. They’re just so…intriguing to her, and their families are so cool as they go on adventures and kick butt, and i think she’s drawn to their energy and how different they are.

She’s a book worm, and she’s bad at talking to people and making eye contact, but she just wants to get to know these kids who go on cool adventures and always seem to have so much fun and struggle with their kingdoms as well, and it’s sweet in my eyes.

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deadcactuswalking · 4 years ago

Text

REVIEWING THE CHARTS: 05/12/2020

Earlier this week, I finished and released by end-of-year list of the Top 10 Best Hit Songs of 2020, which, for once, was on time, being released on the 1st – or 2nd – of December, depending on your time zone. That means I’ve already spent hours discussing music, and to be honest, I have a pretty bad headache in addition to this, so you know, I’m not really in that chart-reviewing spirit. Thankfully, we have very few songs to review here, and a lot of it should be pretty inoffensive. Now, before that, let’s talk about the actual state of the charts because it is looking ridiculous. Ariana Grande’s “positions” spend its sixth week at #1, and welcome to REVIEWING THE CHARTS.

Rundown

Much like last week, it was an absolute bloodbath for any non-Christmas song this week, and this especially affects the hip hop and R&B on the chart. In the UK Top 75, which I cover every week, there’s a drastic difference to the US Billboard Hot 100, and that is the lack of radio. Radio impressions or plays have never been counted on the UK Singles Chart, and whilst in the States, I understand that a lot of Christmas songs rely on the radio, this is not true at all across the pond, because, for whatever reason, Christmas songs are streamed and bought a lot here even 60 years after the song’s original release. This is likely due to a smaller, arguably less diverse population and the immense amount of streaming service-curated playlists, which serve the same purpose as radio and often have the exact same label gimmickry and payola. Regardless, there is a stupid amount of drop-outs and fallers this week, for pretty big tracks as well. Now as I said I only cover the top 75 of the UK Singles Chart because it’s just easier and really, who cares about those last 25 songs? On the UK Singles Chart proper, Lewis Capaldi’s “Someone You Loved”, one of the biggest hits of 2019 and 2020, just spent its 100th week on the chart, which is insane, especially for a modern song. I think the song is dreadful but it is one of the biggest songs of all time here on the Isles, and since we’re going by my measures, it just dropped out (after spending seven weeks at #1, mind you). Of course, that’s not the only notable drop-out – and to be notable, you have to have spent five weeks on the chart or peaked in the top 40 – this week. Let’s list them, shall we? We have “Watermelon Sugar” by Harry Styles, which spent 40 weeks on the chart, as well as #1 hit “Savage Love (Laxed – Siren Beat)” by Jawsh 685 and Jason Derulo, “Giants” by Dermot Kennedy, “Mood Swings” by the late Pop Smoke featuring Lil Tjay, “Lighter” by Nathan Dawe and KSI, “Take You Dancing” by Jason Derulo, “Holiday” by Little Mix, “Tick Tock” by Clean Bandit featuring Mabel and 24kGoldn, “Come Over” by Rudimental featuring Anne-Marie and Tion Wayne, “Lasting Lover” by Sigala and James Arthur, “Holy” by Justin Bieber featuring Chance the Rapper, “One Too Many” by Keith Urban and P!nk, “Papi Chulo” by Octavian and Skepta, “Heat Waves” by Glass Animals, “Deluded” by Tion Wayne and MIST, “Confetti” by Little Mix, “pov” by Ariana Grande (to make way for another one of her songs we’ll get to – also probably the only actually good song that dropped out this week) and finally, “Life Goes On” by BTS off of the debut at #10. On the chart proper, this is one of the biggest free-fall drops of all time, and honestly, who wasn’t expecting this? Speaking of falls, we have a lot of those too. Whilst these are fallers, you should consider how impressive they are for even trying to survive the holiday season, which just can’t be done for a lot of these songs, even the biggest hits of the year, some of which we just mentioned. One of the funniest parts of this to me is that KSI of all people survived the overload of Christmas songs through his Craig David chorus on “Really Love” with Digital Farm Animals down to #17. For a former YouTuber, he has an immense amount of star-power and it’s kind of worrying. Otherwise, our notable fallers include “Paradise” by MEDUZA and Dermot Kennedy at #24, “Train Wreck” by James Arthur at #25 (not a good week for either of these guys – or anyone), “Monster” by Shawn Mendes and Justin Bieber at #26 off of the top 10 debut, “Mood” by 24kGoldn featuring iann dior at #27, “Head & Heart” by Joel Corry and MNEK at #29, “Get Out My Head” by Shane Codd stripped of all of its gains at #31 (seriously, whilst most of these songs were fading naturally prior, this is worrying), “Lemonade” by Internet Money and Gunna featuring NAV and Don Toliver at #34, “Lonely” by Justin Bieber and benny blanco at #42 (giving him four songs as a lead artist on the chart – OCC, that’s not how your dumb rules work; be consistent), “See Nobody” by Wes Nelson and Hardy Caprio really having the most intense combination of streaming cuts and Christmas music at #44, “Wonder” by Shawn Mendes flailing at #45 (it will probably rebound next week), “Blinding Lights” by the Weeknd at #46 (same here), “Golden” by Harry Styles at #47, “Loading” by Central Cee at #48, “What You Know Bout Love” by the late Pop Smoke at #49, “i miss u” by Jax Jones and Au/Ra at #50, “Sunflower (Spider-Man: Into the Spider-Verse)” by Post Malone and Swae Lee at #52, “UFO” by D-Block Europe and Aitch at #55, “Plugged in Freestyle” by A92 and Fumez the Engineer at #56, “Princess Cuts” by Headie One featuring Young T & Bugsey at #60 (which happened to play as I was writing this), “Looking for Me” by Paul Woodford, Diplo and Kareen Lomax at #61, “WAP” by Cardi B featuring Megan Thee Stallion at #62, “Diamonds” by Sam Smith having the biggest fall to #63, “Ain’t it Different” by Headie One featuring AJ Tracey and Stormzy at #65, “Chingy (It’s Whatever)” by Digga D at #69, “Come Over” by Jorja Smith and Popcaan at #70, “SO DONE” by The Kid LAROI at #71 and finally, “Flavour” by Loski and Stormzy at #74. A YouTube comment on the video version of this chart read, “RIP to hip hop and R&B in the UK, 2020-2020”, and, I mean, it’s a fair assessment. That’s not all though, folks, as we have the returning entries, most of which are very explicitly Christmas songs. Let’s start with “Have Yourself a Merry Little Christmas” by Sam Smith at #75, and continue up the chart with “Cozy Little Christmas” by Katy Perry at #73, “Christmas Lights” by Coldplay at #72 (always the best song on the entire chart whenever it returns), “A Little Love” by Celeste from the John Lewis advert at #64, “Feliz Navidad” by José Feliciano at #54, “Santa Baby” by Kylie Minogue at #57, “Let it Snow! Let it Snow! Let it Snow!” by the late Dean Martin at #54, “Sleigh Ride” by the Ronettes at #52, “Mistletoe” by Justin Bieber at #43, “Happy Xmas (War is Over)” by the late John Lennon, Yoko Ono and the Plastic Ono Band featuring the Harlem Community Choir at #40 (always the worst song on the chart whenever it returns), “Wonderful Christmastime” by Paul McCartney at #39 (this is an accurate ranking of the Beatles), “Jingle Bell Rock” by the late Bobby Helms at #38, “Holly Jolly Christmas” by Michael Bublé at #37 and “It’s the Most Wonderful Time of the Year” by the late Andy Williams at #36. Yes, that’s five consecutive Christmas songs returning to the top 40, made all the more ridiculous when you realise it’s topped off by “HOLIDAY” by Lil Nas X... at #41 – and it actually gained this week! Oh, and we don’t stop there either as not only do we have “Santa Tell Me” by Ariana Grande returning to #16 as well, but we also have all of the gains this week. All of our notable gains are in the top 40 and all but one are Christmas songs, so let’s start with “One More Sleep” by Leona Lewis up to #33 (our greatest gain this week) and continue up the chart with “Merry Xmas Everybody” by Slade at #32, “This Christmas” by Jess Glynne at #28, “I Wish it Could be Christmas Everyday” by Wizzard at #23, “Driving Home for Christmas” by Chris Rea at #22, “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree” by Justin Bieber and Brenda Lee at #21 and #19 respectively, “Underneath the Tree” by Kelly Clarkson at #20, “Step into Christmas” by Elton John at #18, “Do They Know it’s Christmas?” by Band Aid at #15 (looking at this chart, I think we ALL know exactly what time it is), “Merry Christmas Everyone” by Shakin’ Stevens at #14, “It’s Beginning to Look a Lot Like Christmas” by Michael Bublé at #13, “Fairytale of New York” by the Pogues featuring the late Kirsty MacColl at #9, “Last Christmas” by Wham! at #3, and finally, “All I Want for Christmas is You” by Mariah Carey at #2. I don’t know if I’ll be happier if a 1994 classic hits #1 for the first time this Christmas, or an Ariana Grande song about sex positions takes the Christmas #1, given, of course, that LadBaby doesn’t pull something out of his ass last minute. Christmas also actually lands on a Friday this week, so there’s potentially two Christmas #1s: the #1 on Christmas Day and the #1 that includes Christmas Day. I mean, there’s this issue every year but since the chart week literally starts and ends on the day this year, I guess we’ll just have to see what the Official Charts Company decides. For now, after not-so-swiftly covering all of that garbage – and there’s three weeks more of it to come, folks – let’s discuss some of our new arrivals, none of which I imagine will be all that interesting but, hey, at least they’re not Christmas songs. In fact...

NEW ARRIVALS

#68 – “Body” – Megan Thee Stallion

Produced by LilJuMadeThatBeat

...It’s the antithesis of what it means to be wholesome, commercial and festive. You all know and love Megan Thee Stallion by now, and whilst I didn’t listen to that debut record yet – it is 17 songs after all – I have heard pretty positive reception so I will check out Good News at some point. Rico Nasty did release a record that’s only one less track and 13 full minutes shorter, so to be honest, I’m a lot more excited to check out that album, even if it won’t have any impact here. I did laugh at the track list when I saw “Intercourse (feat. Popcaan & Mustard)” though, which is one of the few times I have genuinely laughed at just a track list. “Shots Fired” is a pretty great Tory Lanez diss track though, so I’ll say that. “Body” is relatively deep into the track listing, yet seems to be the biggest hit, mostly because of that polarising earworm hook and the music video. Oh, yeah, and it straight-up samples a woman having an orgasm, so don’t expect this to stick around. In fact, that’s the only melody behind this dirty South bounce-adjacent track, and even with that, it only comes in on that chorus, which is less annoying to me as it is just catchy. It’s not like men haven’t done the same thing, though, I mean, Dr. Dre famously – or infamously – “paused 4 porno” on his album 2001, and just in 2018, Kanye released “XTCY”, a song that is hilariously lacking in any kind of moral compass, let alone born-again Christianity. It did the same thing that “Body” does with the moaning yet it also covers it in this really eerie sample, as well as spare 808s and a drum beat that doesn’t feel like it gets in the way of whatever the hell Kanye’s doing on this track. It also helps that the moaning doesn’t just come in on the chorus, instead we have a string swell to distinguish it, and that Kanye has more of a comical lyrical nature on “XTCY”. This comparison is only fair when looking at the production, though, as whilst Kanye has “sick thoughts”, Megan is just bragging about her own body-ody-ody-ody-ody, etc. over a pretty mainstream, accessible beat, even if it has really ugly, loud 808s that kind of do get in the way of the rapping here. Thankfully, Megan rides this beat forcefully – no pun intended – and with some really great wordplay, even if there are a few immediately dated references here and there. That third verse is also pretty funny, and whilst I don’t want to focus too much on this song – it’s a family show after all – this is pretty lively and whilst I’m not a fan of this beat, Megan makes it worth sitting through and honestly, the song sounds a lot shorter than it is. Check it out.

#67 – “Love is a Compass” – Griff

Produced by PARKWILD

I didn’t say the word “compass” on purpose knowing this song would be next, although perhaps I subconsciously snuck the word in. Maybe I should have made it seem like I foreshadowed this song, but honestly what about this warrants foreshadowing? I don’t mind Disney music at all. In fact, a lot of the films are full of really classic compositions that have aged incredibly, including the Renaissance era of their films, especially. In fact, “I’ll Make a Man Out of You” from Mulan – the original – is one of the few soundtrack songs that is directly related to and featured in the film yet I can still listen to outside of that context. I’ve not even watched either Mulan – or have Disney+ - so it’s not like I’m a big fan, but I can appreciate the music when I find it, even if I mostly despise everything Disney stands for as a company. The issue with this is that it cannot apply to “Love is a Compass”. I’m sure Griff and her producer PARKWILD are talented musicians, but this is purely a product. This wasn’t even made for an original animated feature, or a painfully weak adaptation of one of their original animated features starring Will Smith as the Genie. This is a generic piano ballad made for an advert, because just like literal shops and manufacturing companies like John Lewis, Disney has a Christmas advert. There’s nothing artistic about this. This “emotional” piano ballad is layered in reverb and egregious Auto-Tune that drains Griff of whatever emotion her delivery could have had. It doesn’t sound good in this context at all and it is so obvious, which is unfortunate because her voice, Auto-Tuned in a similar way, could easily work over more lo-fi and interesting production. As it is, this is repulsive, sonically and on every other level beyond that.

#66 – “Angels Like You” – Miley Cyrus

Produced by Louis Bell and watt

So, Miley Cyrus dropped her album, Plastic Hearts, last week and I expected more impact on the chart but the two singles are really THAT big that not any of the album cuts had much of a chance, even if “Prisoner” dropped a few spaces. Other than that, “Midnight Sky” is still in the top five and near the end of the chart, we have a debut: “Angels Like You”. It’s clear why this charted because this isn’t just a highlight from the album or a personal favourite of mine, but it’s a fan favourite honestly, a career highlight – which may not be hard to make, I mean, it’s Miley Cyrus we’re talking about – but it still impresses me with how much I really love this song. This is more of a mellow ballad than many of the tracks surrounding it on the record, with Cyrus’ raspy country twang finally met with a fitting blend of acoustic guitars and a genuine orchestral swell in the chorus, even if at times it decides to start clipping. The shift in guitar tone to a dirtier, aggressive one after the first chorus is a genius touch, and even the pretty stiff drum machine here feels like it adds a lot to the power of this song, especially when it starts kicking behind the screeching guitar solo, leading into an admittedly anti-climactic final chorus... that might even be fitting for the content, which is a break-up song but not one that decides to deflect blame or even focus entirely on the break-up, rather being an acknowledgement of what both parties here did wrong, and why they ended up in the relationship to begin with. Both Cyrus and her ex-girlfriend Kaitlynn Carter were in rough spots coming off of previous relationships in late 2019 and those dark spots are what Cyrus understands lead to the collapse of this relationship. She discusses the lack of connection between the two in the first verse, leading to a literally nameless relationship where it was full of romantic gestures but not any depth. The chorus is a complex look at how Cyrus knew she would look back on the relationship as little more than a fling, but how she regrets that this is her only view of the relationship. She didn’t want anything more and split after things started getting too serious, and feels genuine guilt for using Carter to heal her own depression, because “misery needs company”. She uses the biblical metaphor to demonstrate how she feels she tugged down her girlfriend, described here as an “angel”, to the hell Cyrus thinks she resides in, which may be melodramatic, sure, but I’d be lying if I said Cyrus doesn’t completely sell it here, with some of her best vocals to date, backed up by gorgeous production and really well-written lyrics. This is a genuinely brilliant ballad, give it a listen.

#58 – “Naughty List” – Liam Payne and Dixie D’Amelio

Produced by TMS

I’ve been writing these producers as “TM5” for so long without realising it’s an abbreviation for “The Music Shed”. Anyway, I hope we can all agree that Liam Payne is probably the worst off when comparing the One Direction boys and their solo careers so far. Harry Styles is one of the biggest stars in the world, making a twist on 70s classic rock that I don’t like at all but he IS making headlines and having massive chart success. Niall Horan is having mild success making rock and folk albums that are honestly alright, ZAYN has two albums under his belt that may not be listenable but at least the first one was a success and he did go into a more mature R&B direction, and Louis Tomlinson might not have been met with any success from his album earlier this year but at least there’s some quality there. Liam Payne, however, has been releasing straight garbage to no fanfare for the past three years, dating back to “Strip that Down” with Quavo, and continuing down the path of feigning maturity and development with music clearly not backing it up, demonstrated by the bisexual fetishism on his delayed debut album and how his collaborations went from relying on Zedd to relying on J Balvin to relying on TikTok stars on a sexually-charged Christmas single that couldn’t even crack the top 50. I have no idea who Dixie D’Amelio is other than seeing her sister’s controversies on Twitter in passing, but it is depressing that a major-label pop star needs D’Amelio to chart this high – and no, given his most recent singles with bigger features like A Boogie wit da Hoodie and Cheat Codes, as well as the shoddy performance of his last Christmas song, I’m not even considering that it’s the other way around. This immediately, in its first 15 seconds, makes sure you know this will be awful, with its tedious acoustic guitar strumming fused with cheap sounding sleigh bells and dated trap percussion, even with little “hey!” gang vocals straight out of 2014 that make this sound a lot less new and fresh than I think Payne thought it did. Also, something about these lyrics sounds really odd when you consider the age gap between the two vocalists. I mean, D’Amelio’s 19 years old, so it’s not like this is illegal in any way (and they didn’t have any chemistry to begin with), but the childlike imagery in the chorus just makes this gross. “Santa saw the things we did and put us on the naughty list”? This has less subtlety than 3OH!3’s Christmas song they released this year. Yes, that happened, and somehow the two washed-up early 2010s pop stars made a “dirty” Christmas song that is miles better than Liam Payne’s, probably because of the more interesting lyrical detail, and that, you know, it isn’t a duet. Check out “KISSELTOE” if you’re interested, it’s really good. I liked their comeback single with 100 gecs too so I’m pretty excited for whatever comes out of 3OH!3’s recent productivity. This song, on the other hand, as well as the upcoming joke, is just Payne-full.

#53 – “No Time for Tears” – Nathan Dawe and Little Mix

Produced by Tré Jean-Marie and Nathan Dawe

Okay, so, I understand the marketing of releasing a single after a long time of not releasing a single and after your singles have all dropped out of the chart, but Little Mix are just being managed horribly here. Why would you release a single in the Christmas season that you want to be big? This isn’t a holiday song in any way and doesn’t even sound like one, so releasing it this early into the Christmas season is just begging for it to be forgotten and eventually flop. Nathan Dawe is an EDM DJ so he doesn’t need this type of promotion as long as he can tour next year and he’s got big features, and Little Mix don’t need any extra singles because they’re still in the top 10 and they’ve branched out to reality television. Just let the girls breathe for a second and enjoy their success. Oh, and this song isn’t just logistically unnecessary, it’s sonically unnecessary, acting as a house-pop club banger with that standard piano sound reminiscent of 90s house that has been adopted recently by DJs, with any of the infectious melodies and genuine drive sucked out of it, especially if Dawe is going to add a Goddamn trap breakdown in the second verse with the most pathetic set of percussion I’ve heard in years on a house track. It’s not like Little Mix are saving this either because the lyrical content is re-tread and their performances are largely unrecognisable from each other and songs they’ve made before. Yeah, this isn’t offensive, but it isn’t interesting, outside of that bridge, but even then it builds up perfectly to a chorus that’s interrupted by a pointless, repetitious interlude. This song isn’t just uninteresting, it’s inherently unnecessary on all fronts, which if anything, is just kind of sad.

#35 – “All You’re Dreaming Of” – Liam Gallagher

Produced by Simon Aldred and Andrew Wyatt

Surely out of all of these songs, I’d have the most to say about our top 40 debut, with Liam Gallagher, former frontman of legendary rock band Oasis, and his new lead single, right? Well, no, because here are some unfortunate truths: Oasis made two good albums, and they’re not as good as you remember. Liam Gallagher is an awful person who continued to rip off his own band with his new one, without the songwriting ability his brother Noel had. Liam continues to be persistent in his making of enemies for no other reason than publicity. Noel’s reaching out to Liam for the sake of at least reconciliation goes completely unnoticed, ignored or criticised by Liam for no discernable reason other than an on-and-off again facade that’s been going on for more than a decade. Noel wasn’t even that great of a songwriter, relying mostly on musicianship and other people’s melodies he liked to co-opt for his own tracks. None of their solo work has been listenable yet still gathers attention that I imagine is to the dismay of those other band members in Oasis who, ultimately, made those classic albums as much as the Gallaghers. Where’s the praise for Bonehead, Guigsy or even Gem Archer, who stuck it out despite decreasing popularity, utter lack of musical quality and increasing tensions between the people who kept the band afloat until they decided to break up? Both Noel and Liam look at Oasis with regret or admiration depending on how they feel that day but when you look at who REALLY won that Britpop battle tabloids liked to hype up in the 1990s, you realise how far away Oasis was from Blur or even Pulp in terms of not only their songs but having their stuff together. This new song is complete garbage as well, with a pretty awful mixing job, Liam being as distinctively nasal and infuriating as he is with any of his songs let alone his uninteresting ballads, and the COVID-19 charity pandering that comes off as really false, especially since even after Noel released an Oasis track this year as a result of the lockdown – and Liam whining about how he wants to bring the band together to help the NHS – he criticised the honest release of the demo, which Noel wrote and sang himself. It’s also especially telling how the proceeds are only going to benefit charity for its first month of release. Afterwards, Liam and the label can scrape up whatever leftover streams they get from diehard fans. I don’t like Band Aid at all, in fact the song is pretty damn rancid, but at least they keep on recording updated versions to give to modern charities. Liam, you’ve got a bank account the average Manchurian would dream of. This charity single is a fraud, and a pretty hypocritical, immoral one at that.

Conclusion

I think on principle on how fake it is and how awful the song is, I have to give Worst of the Week to Gallagher... but I have a rule against crowning any kind of charity single with that title. At the end of the day, at least something at some point is going to the people who need it. Worst of the Week in that case goes to “Naughty List” by Liam Payne and Dixie D’Amelio, with a Dishonourable Mention to the product that is Griff’s “Love is a Compass”. Best of the Week should be obvious as it’s going to Miley Cyrus for “Angels Like You”, with an Honourable Mention to Megan Thee Stallion’s “Body”. Here’s this week’s top 10:

May I remind you this is the first week of December? Anyway, I doubt Shawn Mendes will make anything through the barrage of holiday tracks, but if he does, that’s next week. Thank you for reading and follow me at @cactusinthebank for more ramblings of this sort, I suppose. See you next week!

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erule · 8 years ago

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Six feet under

Title: Six feet under

Pairing: Dean x Reader

Word Count: 3.3K+

Warnings: angst, romantic, OOC Dean, daddy!Dean, daughter, AU

Summary: Dean’s divorcing from his wife for a lie he told, but they’re still in love with each other and their daughter is the only one who can save this marriage.

Notes: This is the story I wrote for the Fandom Writing Challenge, my prompt was heartfelt apology. This contest is such a great idea! Hope you like it, feedback is always appreciated :) I suggest you to listen to this song while reading.

<< Please, start telling me your name and why you’re here. >> the woman said, with a British accent, sitting on the couch in front of him.

He raised an eyebrow, then he snorted.

<< Fine. My name’s Dean. >>

<< Go on, you’re doing it right, Dean. >>

He shaked his head, frustrated.

<> << It was demonstrated that patiens acquire more awareness, if they say it. Just follow my lead, okay? It will be alright, I promise. >> she responded, with a little smile.

Dean still wasn’t sure about that, but he remembered the reason why he was there, so he talked.

<< My name is Dean Winchester and I’m here, because my wife asked me to. >>

<< Why did she, Dean? >> she asked.

Dean torched his hands, while his gaze was far away, beyond the wall behind the woman. He was recalling the moment she basically ordered him to go. It was painful. It made him feel like she didn’t trust him anymore. Yeah, he made a damn mess, but he knew for certain that he didn’t want to lose his family.

<< Because I… >> he gulped, stopping. He took a breath, planting his nails in his knees, breaking the fabric of the jeans. Ha was almost having a panic attack. Everytime she screamed, the oxygen began to disappear from the room; everytime she felt betrayed by him, it was like he could fall deep down the ground and she would have been happy about it. If only she could see the way he looked at her, she would have felt his pain like it was her own. But she couldn’t. <> he admitted, for the first time, out loud. He looked her in the eyes, glossy and full of suffering. She almost felt bad for him. <>

<< How does it make you feel, Dean? >> she asked, writing some notes on a piece of paper.

He moistened his lips, while the fingers were slipping away from the knees, red of bood.

<< Lost. Broken. Alone. >> he answered. << Well, sort of. Sam, he’s my brother, is always in the motel’s room with me, annoying me. >> he corrected himself, joking. << He doesn’t want to leave me alone. He’s afraid I could do something bad or dumb again. >>

She nodded.

<< What did you do, Dean? What was this mistake you’re talking about? >>

Dean shrugged, passing a hand on his forehead, clenching his jaw. He didn’t want to relive that night, the night in which his whole life fell apart. The never-ending night. That was its name. Sam called like that, of course: he was the genius in the family.

<< No. I can’t. >> he said, with rough and low voice.

<< Dean, the audience is tomorrow. I have to know, so I can help you. >> she stated, raising from the couch as he got up.

<< You don’t know me, Doc. You’re not gonna save me. >>

She locked her eyes in him and, suddenly, the realization hit her.

<< You don’t think you deserve to be saved. >> she whispered.

Dean swallowed, staring at the parquet.

<< A friend of mine said the same, once. I guess it could be true, after all. The only truth that people seem to believe in. >>

Then, he opened the door and walked away.

He sat down next to her, a book in his hands. She placed herself better under the sheets, her blonde hair scattered on the pink pillow. He opened the book, echanging a sympathy glance with her. She chuckled, highlighting her dimples.

<< Shh, don’t wake your mom or she’s gonna be very angry at me. >> Dean said, smiling. She put her hands on her mouth, nodding. << Which story do you prefer, tonight, Princess? >>

<< Alice’s. >> she answered, with her acute voice.

<< Why do you like it so much, baby? >>

<< You called me like your car, daddy! >> she laughed. <>

<< You wanna be strong like her? >>

She shrugged.

<< Maybe. One day. You’ll teach me, right? >>

<< As sure as hell, I will. Starting tomorrow. I’m gonna make you a Led Zeppelin’s tape with all my favourite songs of them. >>

<< Great! Mom hates them. I’m gonna listen to them, when she gets home. >>

<< You look like an angel, but you’re the devil in disguise, Princess. >> She smiled.

<< Now read! >>

<< Don’t be so bossy. I’m gonna read it just for five minutes, okay? Then you’re going to sleep. >>

She agreed, unhappy.

<< Okay. >>

He entered in the office. She didn’t expect to see him, so he wasn’t surprised when she almost lose her temper, when she looked at him. In his head, while she was walking towards him, he saw a past scene in rallenty: the flower’s crown on her head, the bottle of beer that was falling from her hand, her short dress, her bare feet on the grass, her ravenous eyes. The best night of his life. He wished he could come back to that: nine years from now.

<< What are you doing here, Dean? >> she asked, almost as a murmur, but angrily.

<>

<< No. I’m working, Dean. >>

<< You’re always working, Y/N. Last time you didn’t, it was the last day of University. Remember? We had so much fun. >> he whispered in her ear, making her shiver, closing her eyes, but she didn’t fall for that trick.

<< I’m a lawyer, I can’t afford distractions. >>

<< I’ve always been your distraction, sweetheart. >> he replied, while his fingertips were laying on her back, caressing her skin under the blouse.

The minute later, they were closed in the bathroom, his lips all over her body, his fingertips not just on her back and her hands between his hair. Last time he felt her so close to him, not just body but soul too, they were in Chicago, some months before, while their daughter was with his best friend. The good times that now were gone, because of a stupid mistake. His wife hated the white lies, the ones you tell to protect the people you love. But, more of her, his daughter hated them.

<< Uncle Cas? >> she called.

<< He’s coming home, Princess. >> Dean said, taking her hand and kneeling in front of her.

Her eyes instantly filled with tears.

<< Is he dead? >>

Dean shaked his head, drying her tears with a thumb on her cheek.

<< No, baby, he’s returning to his dad. He’s sick and he needs uncle Cas. >>

She breathed out relieved.

<< He did the right thing. If you’d call me, I’d run to you. >>

He hugged her, holding her tight.

<< You’re my beautiful princess, Celeste. I’d kill whoever tried to hurt you. >>

She closed her eyes, laying her head on his shoulder.

<< Auntie Charlie was a pretty girl, daddy. Will I be pretty like her? >>

Dean nodded, with a knot in his throat. Celeste was Charlie’s real name and he gave it to his daughter when she died. She was like a sister, to him. She was the best part of him and when she died, that part died with her too.

<< You’ll be even prettier, because a part of her is with you. >>

Like she was always with him.

She went out from the bathroom, trying to adjust her clothes, while he was putting on his belt again. She put her hair in a ponytail and that made him laugh a bit.

<< What’s so funny? >> << You always do that when you’re uncomfortable. Are you uncomfortable, because you’re divorcing from the man you still love? >>

She took a deep breath, then she turned around to face him.

<< Guess who called me this morning. >>

Dean rolled his eyes.

<< And she said…? >> << She said that you basically ran away from the office. You’re such a bad liar, Dean. If you don’t care about this family anymore, why do you put so much effort in this? Just let go. We’ll be fine. >>

The rage grew up in his stomach. They just proved the world wrong, after what they just did in the bathroom, but she still wanted to hide behind a lie? She was too overprotective. She didn’t want to get hurt and she wanted to keep Celeste safe, away from him and he got it, but hell, she couldn’t just blame him for everything!

<< We’ll be fine? Are you kidding me, Y/N? >> he asked. She tried to talk, but he raised his voice. << I’ve protected you from a decade, Y/N. Don’t say that I don’t love my family, because, someone help me, every damn step I made in these years, I made them for you and Celeste! After I found out… >>

<< Yes! That’s right! That’s the lie you kept telling you and me, that comes out again. You didn’t just find out, Dean. You did it. >> she replied and he noticed that her eyes were tired, circled in red. She was exhausted. << You did it. She meant something to me. >>

He gulped.

<< She meant something to me too. >>

<< You knew I loved her… >> she stopped, holding back the tears, a hand in front of her nose, trying not to cry. << You, Cas and Sam, you did that. I can’t just forgive you, like nothing ever happened. She won’t. >>

<< You’re on her side, even if you’re still in love with me. >>

Her bottom lip trembled, but she nodded.

<< She comes first. You’ve always said that. >>

<< She doesn’t understand, Y/N. Make me talk to her and she will. >> << No. You can’t see her before the audience. She would change her statement. >>

Dean closed his eyes, finally she came clean to him.

<< You don’t want her to change her statement, don’t you? >>

<> she whispered, pointing a finger at him. << And even if I don’t want you in jail, I sure as hell want you miles away from me and Celeste. >>

Dean held her wrist, looking her in the eyes.

<< I’m not a murderer, Y/N. >>

Her gaze was full of hatred, when she spoke.

<< Maybe not, but you covered the murder and you kept it hidden from me. >>

<< You couldn’t handle. >> << You didn’t give me the chance to try. >> she replied, then she wriggled and he remained alone in the alley, his heart falling in his stomach.

Dean went as soon as Cas called him. Something bad had happened to Charlie and he had to run to her. Sam was already there, according to Cas, his best friend. When he arrived, it was very late. He entered in the garage and he saw Cas’ face, in pain, his clenched jaw and Sam’s eyes circled in red.

<< Where’s Charlie? >> he asked, feeling that his voice was about to crack. A bad feeling was killing him on the inside. He knew that she was gone. He knew it, yet he was hoping that it was just his fantasy.

Castiel pointed a finger at the silhouette of a corpse on the ground, covered by a white blanket. Dean closed his eyes, not able to kneel next to her, to look at her.

<< Dean, we aren’t supposed to be here. >> Sam spoke. << She was killed by the men of Cas’ uncle, while she was undercover. We can’t talk. They found out that she was police, so they killed her. If they’d know that we… >>

<> Dean said, remaining calm, too much for a man who already lost his best friend, his almost sister. << We’ll handle this. Y/N mustn’t know. >>

Cas crossed his arms.

<< Why? >>

<< She loves… I mean, she loved Charlie so much. She can’t know that a damn criminal killed her. We’ll make up an excuse, like a stroke or a disease. >> << Dean, sooner or later, she’ll find out. >> Sam replied.

<< She’s my wife, so I get to decide for her. She will not know. Try to tell her and I swear, I’m gonna kill you both. >> Dean threatened. They nodded. << Good. Now, let’s get to work. >>

***

Dean closed his eyes, in front of the court. He was about to enter in a room, to listen to a judge who didn’t know anything about his relationship with his wife nor his daughter, but he would have done what the lawyers wanted and he would have taken his daughter away from him. He went to the doctress to learn how to get his family back, but it didn’t help. Even if he tried to say to his wife how he felt, it didn’t work. Y/N found out about Charlie after she heard a phone call between Cas and his dying father. His uncle was in jail by now and he sold out the men who killed Charlie, in order to get released. Y/N, though, questioned their whole marriage, because if he lied to her about something so important, maybe he could have lied about more. He confessed that he knew, but it was the only big lie he told her, he sweared. But that wasn’t the only thing that went worse that night: Celeste heard them and she, that had this sort of “myth” about her beloved aunt Charlie, got so angry, she yelled at Dean. She understood that he lied to her mom and that he lied about Charlie. That was the moment in which his heart fell into pieces.

Y/N arrived with her black tailleur, holding Celeste’s hand. He got closer, while Sam was arriving too. Y/N tried to avoid him, but he stood in front of them.

<< Hey, how are you? >> he asked, trying to fake a smile.

<< Let us walk, Dean. >> Y/N replied.

<< Can I talk to Celeste for one minute? >>

<< No. >>

<< Oh, come on, Y/N! You’re about to take her away from me forever, can I just talk to her for five minutes? >>

She snorted, then she looked at her daughter. Celeste nodded.

<< I’ll give you two minutes. >>

<< Fine. >> Dean said, then she went away and he kneeled down, in order to face his daughter. << Hey Princess, how are you? >>

<< Good. >> she answered, without looking at him.

<< Why are you not looking at me, Celeste? >>

She looked at the ground, her hands behind her back.

<< Because I don’t want to cry. >>

Dean breathed out, sad.

<< Listen, baby, you know I will always love you, right? I will love you even if the world would crumble down. If this is what your mother wants, I will find another apartment, I will see you when I will be allowed to. I will, I swear to you, that I will. But I don’t think that this is what she desires. She’s just very angry at me. >>

<< Mom warned me. You’re not gonna make me change my mind or hers. >> Celelste replied, looking at him fiercely. He really was his daughter, after all: determined, strong.

<< You really are like me, don’t you? >> he asked, smiling. She shrugged. But, if she was like him, she wanted honesty. She wanted to feel loved, to open up. She wanted the painful truth. << I’ll give you the speech, Celeste. I’m sorry. I already told your mom a hundred times, but it wasn’t needed. I apologize to you from the bottom of my heart, because Charlie was important to you too and I should have told you about her. I should have told you now, when you’re grown and you can understand things better. >> Dean said, giving her the heartfelt apology she deserved and her eyes became glossy and red. << The night we met for the first time, the night you were born, I swore to protect you from this world, because I’m you father and that’s my job. And I will always do it, no matter what. But if you don’t talk to your mom today, I won’t be able to do it properly. I will see you just sometimes and I will have to miss you every damn day. I don’t know if your mom would change her mind, I don’t know if you still love me, maybe I’m just so selfish, but I feel good only when I’m with you. >> he continued and Celeste’s cheeks were wet of tears. Dean’s voice cracked at the end, but he wanted to let her know everything. << And when I’m without you, it’s like my heart is six feet under the ground. That’s how it would feel, if I’d no longer be your dad. >>

Celeste sobbed and then, she hugged him. She hugged him so tight, her knuckles went white. The tears were burning behind his eyes, but feeling so close to her, made him feel already better.

<< Celeste? >> Y/N called. << Honey, what’s wrong? Dean, what did you do? >> she asked, scared.

<< Don’t do it! >> Celeste screamed. <>

Y/N exhaled, thinking about what to do. They had to enter in that room, to talk about the case. She couldn’t just blow it.

<< Can I talk to you for a second, Dean? >> she asked.

He dried his tears with a thumb, leaving his daughter with Sam. He smiled at her, while he was dissolving the embrace. He reached his wife, who was biting her bottom lip, confused.

<< You lied to me, Dean. I know that you wanted to protect me and Celeste, I know that Cas is trying to handle the situation with his family, but I’m scared. I’m scared that he could find you and then us and… >>

<< You think that pushing me away would help? >> Dean asked, in disbelief.

She breathed out, looking anywhere but him.

<>

Dean closed his eyes, passing a hand on his face.

<< You were protecting me. >>

She nodded.

<>

<< That’s why we got laid in that bathroom, yesterday. I was right. You never stopped loving me. >>

She nodded, again.

<< You’re so cheesy, Dean. Like in the letters you wrote me during college to ask me out. >> << Well, tell me they didn’t work. >> he said, with a smirk. She chuckled.

<< They worked, when you bought the tickets for a certain concert you remember. >>

<< Hell yes, it was the first time we… >> he was saying, but then, she cupped his cheeks in her hands and kissed him, leaving him breathless. Celeste shouted and Sam laughed, behind Dean. << …kissed. >> he finished, when she left him to breathe.

<< I’m fucking in love with you, Dean Winchester. >>

He smiled, happy.

<< Me too, baby. >> he decide to call her like his car, because his daughter didn’t love that nickname very much, but she seemed to. << Me too. >>

#fandomwritingchallenge #dean winchester #dean x reader #dean winchester ff #dean winchester imagine #dean winchester fanfiction #dean winchester fanfic #jensen ackles #spn fanfiction #spn fanfic #spn ff #spn imagine #spn #supernatural #supernatural imagine #supernatural fanfiction #SUPERNATURAL AU #castiel #sam winchester

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kanadia413 · 8 years ago

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Danganronpa Non-Despair Au Shipping Headcanons

This is kinda just my musings on how certain couples would have gotten together and other headcanons about them in a non-despair au. I’m going to cover Ishimondo, Naegami, Komahina and Soudam. I’m keeping this PG-13 but I might do another later that’s has my 18+ headcanons.

Ishimondo So these two took for fricken ever to start dating, literally everyone else in their class saw the blatant flirting before they realized they were doing it, (there was even a betting pool for they’d finally confess, Celeste won obviously). But the two started off rivals of sorts, not outright hating each other just having very different moral. They argued a lot and eventually the class (mainly Junko who was sick of the sexual tension) locked them in the classroom for about an hour. The two talked for a while and ended up forming a mutual respect for each other. They became good friends and spent a lot of time together. Ishmaru had come out as gay a while ago (long story made short his dad was trying to figure out how to win over the LGBT community and Ishimaru casually said that since he was gay he would probably have more luck with making a strategy for winning the vote. His dad took two days fully process it and eventually accepted it) and got teased a lot for it, however Ishimaru was totally ignorant to the mockery as he just saw it as the others stating the truth. Mondo found out and stood up for Ishimaru who thanked him despite not understanding why he had yelled at the other students. Mondo found his smile unnaturally cute and after about a week of obsessing over his friends sudden cuteness he realized that he was crushing big and basically confessed by leaving some notes around Ishimarus desk and locker. When he confessed in person Ishimaru just stared at him for a minute before hugging him and giving him a peck on the cheek. The next day they went to class together hand in hand and everyone congratulated them. Neither understood why they were being congratulated as they were trying to hide their new found relationship but shrugged it off. That day Celeste won $500. Smaller headcanons are that Ishimarus boots take forever to get off but Mondo loves the way they look on the other. Ishimaru likes the way Mondo looks with his hair down and often plays with it when the other has it down. Ishimaru has dat ass, and Mondo constantly reminds him of this fact. Mondo’s gang only found out Mondo was when they came in one day to find the two making out. They were surprisingly accepting of the twos relationship.

Naegami I see Togami denying any feelings for Naegi, mainly idle thoughts of how cute the other was. Then one day he’d let it slip and call Naegi cute. To which Naegi would initially be flustered by then start teasing him. Togami would get annoyed and basically say fuck it and kiss Naegi to shut him up. It would indeed shut him up for about a minute before Naegi would swarm him with questions mainly being about what the kiss meant and if they were dating. It would annoy Togami even more and he’d kiss him again to shut him up and then say “We’re dating now” before shewing the other off because he wanted to read. The next day Kirigiri would congratulate Togami but no one else would notice any difference in the two till they realized Togami was actually listening to Naegi and was treating him a bit kinder(Naegi would have Togami wipped, mainly due to Togamis inability to resist the smaller boy when he asked him to do something). A few smaller headcanons I have are that Naegi bought both a stepstool and a pair of platform boots to help him initiate kisses with Togami, that 10 inch height difference can create so many fun situations. Also on multiple occasions when they first started to date Togami would avoid kissing Naegi when they were both standing because it made him feel like he was kissing a child due to Naegi’s height and baby face. He also liked it when Naegi would sit in his lap, he enjoyed the closeness and warmth of the other.

Komahina So the two met when Komaeda was sent to get Chiaki one day because she was skipping class. Chiaki had befriended Hinata as per dr3 side Despair, and had bonded over video games. I headcanon Chiaki as ace btw. So Komaeda found the two at the water fountain and basically it was gay at first sight. He then proceeded to awkwardly stare at Hinata from a distance for a solid 5 minutes. Hinata saw this and told Chiaki who glanced up and saw Komaeda and called him over. He came over and still acted a bit awkwardly (Hinata thought he was a creep stalking Chiaki and he was half right) around Hinata. Chiaki bridged the gap through a 3 player game and the 3 kind of became a group. Hinata and Komaeda never hung out without Chiaki and Hinata was still a bit skeptical of Komaeda. Chiaki saw how Komaeda felt and decided to play matchmaker by ditching the two one day forcing them to talk and get to know each other. There was awkward silence for a few minutes before the two began chatting and found they had more in common then they thought. Hinata found Komaeda surprisingly charming though his sense of humor was bit odd but still amusing. However he hated the way Komaeda talked about himself and told him to stop calling himself trash because that was stupid and untrue. Komaeda teared up and hugged Hinata, which startling him, before he relaxed and hugged back. After that they ended up hanging out a bit more, with Chiaki treating it like a matchmaking game, helping to push them along (she also totally shipped the two, along with Ibuki and Sonia) and once again a betting pool was made on when they two would finally get together. After a few months Hinata found he had a crush on the other but tried to ignore it. One day Hinata introduced Komaeda to Naegi who he’d met in the library and bonded over their ahoge’s. He had decided to introduce the two after finding out that Naegi was the SHSL luck (Hinata had assumed he was a reserve school student like himself at first) and mentioned that his best friend was also a SHSL luckster and offered to introduce the two. When Komaeda met Naegi he acted like he did in side hope, a bit too handsy and flirty for Hinatas taste. Hinata ended up getting jealous and dragging Komaeda away prematurely. Komaeda was confused about what had happened but saw that Hinata was red in the face and tearing up a bit. Komaeda said something along of “I know you could never have feelings for trash like me and I’m probably just misunderstanding all of this but your acting a bit.... off so I might as well take this opportunity to tell you something I’ve been thinking for a long time. Hinata I love you and the hope that sleeps inside you. I hope your okay with trash like me liking you.’ Hinata would be a bit pissed about all the trash comments but tear up and hug the other in a basically tackle hug and kiss him telling him he felt the same. The two would laugh together and cuddle a bit. The next day Komaeda would bring Hinata with him to have lunch in the main course building and they would sit really close and act disgustingly couply. Someone (probably Souda) would come up and throw money at Komaeda yelling at him about how he should be happy about winning the bet, and Komaeda would be really confused. It turned out Komaeda had won the bet about when he and Hinata would get together because he had heard the others making a bet and without knowing anything about what the bet was about he threw in some money and picked a random date, which ended up being the exact day the two confessed. Small headcanons: The good luck of all that resulting in bad luck in the form of the two being cockblocked for about a year, whenever they tried to do more than making out they would get caught or interrupted, and I literally mean every time. Komaeda is also really affectionate pulling Hinata into his lap constantly nuzzling his arm or leaning up against him. Hinata is also a total tsundere, denying that he likes how handsy Komaeda can be. He also loves playing with Komaedas mass of fluffy hair, Komaeda usually is the big spoon when they cuddle but it normally ends in them just curling up facing each other. These two are the most affectionate couple, they act very close and are constantly holding hands or hugging. Hinata likes to steal Komaedas jacket and wear it around, he claims its supper warm and comfortable and Komaeda never complains because he thinks Hinata looks absolutely adorable in his clothes.

Soudam So first off I headcanon Gundam as a flamingly gay dude, okay maybe not that bad but the type that you wouldn’t realize he’s gay till you were told and then everything makes sense. Anyway Souda would start off completely enamored with Sonia, however he liked the idea of Sonia as a perfect princess more that the real thing. Sonia liked Gundam, fully aware that he was gay but still tried to cozy up to him in hopes that he might fall for her, Souda didn’t realize he was gay and just assumed Gundam was after Sonia. At first I see Gundam not actually liking Souda, not hating him but being more impartial, but as he spent time with Sonia and Souda he would grow to like Souda and find his personality endearing and his actions rather cute, he would remind him of a grouchy dog, that really just wanted to be pet, mixed with a baby shark. Either way Gundam gradually developed a crush on Souda and was fully aware of his feelings, he also tried to spend more time alone with the other as he realized that Sonia’s presence would make Souda jealous of him. As they hung out alone more Souda would start to see Gundam not as a rival but a good friend, and start developing a small crush on the other, however he would vehemently deny it if asked and didn’t realize it himself. One day Sonia and Gundam would have an argument and Sonia would look to Souda for help, Souda stopped hanging out with Gundam and finally got his wish of being with Sonia (not in a relationship more close friends) however despite getting his wish he didn’t feel happy or content he felt like something was missing and eventually realized that he missed Gundam. He started asking around about Gundam and eventually found out that Gundam was gay and a rumor was being spread that he was dating someone. Souda felt heartbroken, but like the idiot he was he’d still have no idea why. He avoided Gundam for a week or two before finally realizing that he liked the other. The next day before class he stormed into the room, up to Gundum who tried to ask him why he had been acting so cold recently. Souda wouldn’t respond by grabbed Gundam by the scarf and pulling him down for a kiss. That kiss would lead to making out and the rest of the class would have to left the room after failing to get the two to stop, and also because they had had enough of seeing gay idiots being gay idiots due to Komaeda and Hinatas constant displays of public affection. After a while the class would go find Ishimaru and get him to break up the makeout session by repremaning the two for their displays of public affection all the while Mondo would be laughing his ass off because he and Ishimaru had been kissing in an abandoned classroom and just barely managed to avoid getting caught by the class. smaller headcannons: Gundam is extremely weak to Soudas puppy dog eyes, he literally cannot say no to them. Souda likes stealing Gundams scarf because its warm and smells good. Gundam likewise steals Soudas hat because he thinks he looks better without it. Souda likes playing with Gundams four dark devas and occasionally refers to them as their children. Gundam tamed a shark and tried to give it to Souda for a birthday present which failed spectacularly and ended with a terrified Souda being held by the shark in the tank ( the shark thought Souda was its child), it took 20 minutes to get the shark to let go of Souda and since then Souda is reluctant to get into any pools. Gundam thinks Souda eats bread like a rabbit, nibbling on the edges. Despite others insistence Gundam refuses to believe that Souda is not an angel or water god, or that Souda is not cute, which Souda will constantly deny.

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hongism · 4 years ago

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mists of celeste ➻ 26

➻ pairing: ??? x fem reader ➻ genre: space au, pirate au, space pirate!ateez, angst, smut ➻ Word Count: 4.9k ➻ Rating: M ➻ Warnings: language, violence, guns and weaponry, blood, smut, future warnings tba ➻ summary: Sneaking aboard the ship of a renowned space pirate may not have been the best idea, but you’ll have to make do with what fate has handed to you

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act four ➻ part one

It only takes three knocks against the cool metal of the door for Seonghwa to answer it. He blinks down at you, eyes a bit wide in surprise, but you don’t let the surprise stay for long. You tug the edge of your sleeve a bit, folding the material against your palm as you fidget in front of him.

“Can I come in?” You ask in a quiet tone. You’re barely able to look him in the eye, but he seems to find some amusement in that.

“You act like we don’t do this every other night,” he teases before stepping to the side to let you into the room. “Although you’re considerably earlier than usual tonight.”

Admittedly it’s because of the nerves running through your system. Less than a day has passed since you informed Hongjoong of your identity as a Siren, and you spent the night cold and alone yesterday, thanks to Hongjoong bringing Seonghwa to the bridge to discuss things he’d said to you as well. Plans. One after the other, all options and possibilities, yet all pointing to the same end. Your revelation to him bought precious time – time that he intends to use to confront the man who betrayed him and provided a dead lead. Not the one who tore his crew apart from the inside out, no, but Hongjoong had claimed to you that this was the next best thing, and an equally terrifying adversary. He didn’t divulge the rest of his plans to you at that moment but swore to once he and Seonghwa solidified the strategy moving forward.

And thus, it is stress that brings you to Seonghwa’s door early, and the inherent need for comfort.

The door slides shut behind you, a sharp snap of the metal, and you turn to look at Seonghwa’s face at last. It’s almost intimidating how good he looks without any effort, black strands of hair framing his forehead with gentle curls. You dare to take a few steps towards him. He arches a brow as you push his back to the door, and one hand comes to rest on your hip as though by instinct.

“I-I was hoping… that, uh–” you cut yourself short. The embarrassment comes from nowhere; it’s not the first time you’ve done this, and you doubt that this will be the last, yet Seonghwa’s mere presence always makes you seize up and struggle with the smallest words. The hand on your hip shifts a bit. Then, all of a sudden, your back is the one hitting the cold surface of the door. Seonghwa’s hand remains on your hip, but he brings his other one up to cage you between the door and his body. The action makes you feel so incredibly small. Your breath catches in your throat, and you sink your teeth into your lower lip to keep a gasp from slipping out.

“Were you hoping that I’d fuck you senseless beforehand?” Seonghwa asks as though it’s the most casual question in existence. You bring a hand to his chest, slapping him for the crude comment, but don’t deny his words. Your scandalized expression merely masks the hammering beat of your heart in your chest.

“Only if you think you can manage it,” you whisper back, tilting your chin up a little. Seonghwa’s lips twitch a bit at the insinuation in your words. The hand on your hip slides upwards to land on the base of your throat, but he hesitates there. Eyes flit up to meet yours before you drape a hand atop his. A small gesture, but a confirmation and an encouragement. As his grip tightens pleasurably around your neck, you secure a leg around Seonghwa’s waist, drawing him closer to your body until all you feel is the heat of his presence. “More…”

That’s all you need to say for him to let loose a barely restrained growl, and Seonghwa secures an arm behind your back before lifting you off the door. Lips meet in a mess of teeth and saliva. Your back curves to mold against Seonghwa’s body like it’s what you’re made for, his tongue flicking over your bottom lip and begging entrance only once before you grant it.

“If you keep saying things like that, I won’t be able to hold back,” Seonghwa murmurs, still pressed tight to your lips. You thread your fingers through his dark hair and tug him back just far enough to whisper a response.

“What if I don’t want you to hold back?”

That’s the thing you’ve noticed about Seonghwa in the time you’ve known him. He is ever so patient with you. You would say that he’s guarded, but it’s anything but that in reality. He merely lays out the options before you and tells you to make the choices. He tiptoes around you like you’re a ticking time bomb, and while you appreciate his gentle nature, a large part of you just wishes that he would do whatever he wants rather than waiting for you to tell him what you desire.

When your lips part and your back hits the mattress, Seonghwa seems to read your mind. His gaze remains soft as he bends over your reclining body on the bed, knees finding purchase on the comforter on either side of your hips. Even though you don’t have to, you still choose to voice the question lingering on your lips, if only for verbal confirmation, if only for more than that thinly veiled emotion in his eyes that you’ve missed so much in the past few years.

“What are you waiting for?”

Seonghwa hums without offering an answer for a few moments. He pulls back to straighten his back, fingers dipping down to tug the hem of his shirt out of the confines of his pants. In those moments of silence – as few as they may be – you doubt that he’s going to respond at all. As the shirt falls to the floor, toned muscles and tanned skin on clear display now, he gives you his answer.

“For it to not to be a question anymore.”

The silence between you is palpable in every sense. He moves with careful and hesitant movements, hands bracing on either side of your head when he returns to hovering over you. You slide a hand up the firm expanse of his chest only to reach around his neck and tangle your fingers in his hair. Offering a sharp tug, you revel in the hiss that whistles through his gritted teeth and the way his eyes darken with lust as he looks down at you.

“It was never a question, Park Seonghwa.”

“I don’t mean a question from this–” Seonghwa lifts a hand to press a single finger to your mouth, an amused grin toying with the corners of his own lips. That same finger slides further down to linger mere centimeters away from your chest, pinpointing your heart behind the confines of your skin and bones. “I mean from this. You have suffered enough from people who simply desire to take from you. Forgive me if I want to give you that which you are owed.”

“Just say ‘I like you’ and move on,” you scoff, tone light and teasing to deflect the harsh wave of emotions that washes over you. Seonghwa’s smile turns fond as he mulls over a response.

“Saying only that much wouldn’t do my feelings justice.”

This time when your breath catches and you choke on air, Seonghwa is there to capture your lips again. His slot against your mouth like a hot cushion, and he doesn’t wait for permission to slip his tongue into your wet heat. You can only offer a soft whine before he pulls away too soon for your liking.

“You never gave me permission,” he murmurs, breath fanning over your face. “Don’t ask me to take control. Put it in my hands and trust me with it.”

“My trust is already yours.” You exhale a small sigh and sneak your hands down to loop your fingers around Seonghwa’s belt. “And I’m giving you permission to not hold back any longer.” Seonghwa waits, eyes searching yours for any sign of hesitance. Once he’s satisfied, he dips back down and presses his lips to yours once more. The kiss is languid this time, as though you have all the time in the universe to be under Seonghwa like this. He doesn’t remain there long; instead, he drags his lips to the edge of your jaw. You’re tempted to tell him not to leave marks, but as soon as his teeth drag over the column of your throat, all reason leaves your body.

“If I were to exercise a lack of control… I would make sure everyone in the universe knew what I was doing to you.” There’s a breath of hesitation, only long enough for him to suck a mark to your skin, one that surely blossoms with reds and purples. “Because I’m greedy–” he nips at your skin as he travels lower “–and selfish–” hands slip under the hem of your shirt and goosebumps rise in the wake of his touch “–and I want you all to myself.” Seonghwa pauses his ministrations only to deprive you of your shirt, ridding the offending material and giving him more access to the unmarked skin underneath. “I would ruin you if you let me.”

“Then why don’t you shut up and show me already.” You release a huff, an indignant sound that brings a laugh out of Seonghwa. He hums a bit before tilting his head to the side. The look in his eyes is nothing short of predatory and hungry, a gleam that causes the coil in your gut to tighten further. Seonghwa’s teeth graze the junction of your neck and shoulder. He bites down hard on the skin there, not hard enough to draw blood but hard enough to elicit a prolonged moan from your lips. The sound spurs him on, tongue lapping over the skin he bit to deepen the bruise.

“Perhaps I should go even slower then? Give you a lesson in patience instead?” Your hands are fervent on his belt, rushing to tug the leather away from his body, but he stops you by placing his own hands atop yours.

“Don’t you dare.” Part of you wants to hit him, the other part wants him to merely hurry up and get on with things.

“As you wish, princess.” His brow quirks as he pulls back to sit up straight. His hands replace yours on the belt, and he rids himself of the material with much more luck than you had. You move to divest yourself of your pants, his movements encouraging you onwards. You don’t even get them halfway down before Seonghwa is stopping you, body wholly void of clothing now. He catches your hands in his own and tugs them up in one quick movement. The action brings a heady feeling with it. Seonghwa’s strength catches you off-guard, his lithe muscles exhibiting more power than you recall him having. “You surrendered all control, love. I’ll remove the rest of your clothing when I see fit.”

He moves and speaks with a certain cockiness – not one that is goading like Hongjoong’s or infuriating like Yeosang’s. The lust in his tone is thick like the air between you, and as much as you want to surrender every last bit of control in your being, something is holding you back. Seonghwa seems to notice that, hand gripping your wrists like a vice and keeping you pinned to the bed with ease, but he doesn’t move any more than that. Again, his eyes are searching yours.

“You say that you’re being selfish but am I not the selfish one?” You whisper before you can stop yourself. Seonghwa lifts his chin, eyes darting to the side as he formulates a response.

“We don’t have to do this.”

“I want it though.” A pause, a breath, then — “I want you.”

Seonghwa’s lips draw together to form a thin line. “But you don’t want this to be nothing but a fleeting feeling. You want something that lasts, something more than what you only had a taste of before. And yet…”

“I’m afraid to take it,” you finish for him. “When I let go of all control before, I lost so much. As much as I trust you, my mind refuses to push that thought to the side.” Seonghwa’s lips twitch into a smile.

“Once more,” he whispers, hands sliding down to find the hem of your pants. “If it’s what you want, let’s do this once more.” He hesitates over your skin, but the burning path of his fingers lingers. He passes the choice over to you. Sets out the options for you to make the decision, gaze ever so soft as he looks down at you. “And if it’s time that you need, I can be as patient as you need me to be. Whatever it is you want this to be… whatever it is you need me to be… I’ll do it for you.”

“And what if I want more after this?”

“I won’t take more than what you give.”

“Even if I ask you to?”

“I trust your heart more than I trust the words that come from your lips. There are many ways I would wish to have you… but unfairly is not one of them. I can sense your distress, yes, but I can’t pretend to understand your heart better than you do. You’re asking me to answer a question that only you know the answer to.” As much as you don’t want to admit it, Seonghwa is correct. Even though unspoken, you are asking him to serve your emotions on a silver platter, tell you what you are currently feeling and what you’re supposed to feel.

“Once more… with feeling,” you say with a nod. It’s more for yourself than it is for Seonghwa, but he smiles down at you nonetheless before leaning down to lay his forehead atop yours.

“I wouldn’t deprive you of that much.”

You don’t fully understand what he means by that. When you open your mouth to ask him though, Seonghwa cuts you off by cushioning your lips with his own again. He moves like he never missed a beat, like that pause for conversation was nothing more than a few seconds. You can tell that he’s taking your words to heart though; the kiss is slower this time, if possible. He doesn’t proceed without your encouragement, only beginning to tug your pants down when you drape your arms around his neck. You hook your legs around his waist once he completely divests you of the clothing. It only takes moments for his hand to press between your legs, nudging your folds apart to drag the pads of his fingers over the arousal pooling there.

“Fuck, you’re so wet,” he hisses through gritted teeth as he pushes a single finger into you. Your fingers tangle in his hair, tugging roughly on the dark locks until he brings his lips back to yours. The two of you move as though in a trance, and your tongues press together fervently until you have to pull back to breathe. Seonghwa is quick to slip another finger in, curling them deep inside you, and the action has you releasing a string of throaty moans. Rather than letting your lips meet again, you drag your mouth down the smooth expanse of his neck and take the spotless skin between your teeth to repay his marks in kind. You release him with a lewd pop of your lips, a string of saliva connecting your bottom lip to his neck.

“I hope you still plan to fuck me senseless,” you tease through a breathy whine. Seonghwa laughs, hot breath cascading over the shell of your ear, then he catches your cartilage between his teeth. It’s meant to be a teasing action only, but he hits a nerve that has your spine curling.

“I wouldn’t dream of doing otherwise, princess.” You’re about to urge him to hurry up when his fingers slip out of you, and you instinctively tighten your thighs around his hips. His cock slides home in one swift thrust. The moan that leaves you is nothing short of obscene and loud – too loud, most likely, but you can only hope that the others are still too preoccupied with dinner to be listening in on your activities. Seonghwa sits up on his knees, hands seeking yours and your fingers thread through his without question or hesitation.

His eyes find yours. He remains completely still like that for several moments, and at first, you think it’s because he wants to give you time to adjust to his size, but even after you wiggle your hips a bit, he stays put. The heat of his stare seems to almost unmake you, take you apart bit by bit and leave you raw and bare under him. His next movement is a sudden one, but pleasurable nonetheless. It’s with a great deal of force that he pins your hands to the bed on either side of your head, cock thrusting in and out of you in a way that’s too sinful for words. You could come undone right then, but you hold on for as long as you can now that there’s uncertainty about when this might happen again. It’s not a thought you want to have and not one that should be on your mind now of all times. When Seonghwa rolls his hips against yours, the thought perishes and is overwhelmed by pleasure instead. The way in which he fucks you nearly makes you want to be selfish and greedy; it makes you want him to do the same as well, but he’s given you a chance. He’s given you patience and kindness, as much as he claims to be selfish. You want to at least honor that kindness, even if you can already guess what your answer will be.

His thrusts find a faster pace, and each one seems to hit harder than the last. If not for the chorus of moans tumbling from your lips, you’re certain that you’d be able to hear the bed squeaking and straining under your combined efforts. The slide of his member inside you is pure bliss. You have to squeeze your eyes shut to keep him from seeing the way your eyes roll back from the sensation.

“O-Oh, fuck, f-fuck, Seong… Seonghwa,” you babble, chin dropping to the side as the heat of your orgasm approaches. “I’m go-gonna cum, please, I’m gonna cum.”

“Cum for me then, princess,” Seonghwa purrs. The smile twisting his lips is sickeningly sweet, and all it takes is one more pointed thrust for you to come undone under him. He follows close behind, reaching his high with nothing more than a bitten-back groan. The warmth hits you hard, and even though you’re already spent, you let loose one more weak whimper before the breath leaves your lungs. Your chest heaves as you recover, and you blink violently at the ceiling past Seonghwa’s sweat-stricken face. When his lips brush your jaw, you twist so that your lips can meet, hot breath intermingling with his as he indulges you in an open-mouthed kiss. The emotion that twists in your gut is one that’s familiar, but also one that you’ve run from in the past. You felt it the first time you slept with Seonghwa, that warmth that scared you so much and overwhelmed every other sensation in your body. Strangely, it’s peace that washes over you. Not regret or pain or disgust. Just… peace.

…

And as it turns out, ‘once more’ became ‘twice more, plus once in the shower for good measure,’ but you really have no complaints about that because of the way Seonghwa fucked you while you had your face pressed to the cool tile of the shower wall. Frankly, you think that Seonghwa would have asked to go for another round if not for the dinging from his wristband and Hongjoong’s stony tone interrupting an otherwise intimate moment. Which is why you find yourself standing in Hongjoong’s quarters alongside Seonghwa in front of the captain’s desk well past the time you usually go to sleep. You wish you could blame Seonghwa for wearing you out, but it’s getting progressively difficult to keep your eyes open. He doesn’t seem affected at all himself, which is wildly unfair because Hongjoong’s drawling monotone is about to put you to sleep.

“We’ll need three teams for entry,” Hongjoong says through a sigh, paying your dragging yawn no mind. Seonghwa folds his arms over his chest and looks down at the map before Hongjoong, red and blue streaks covering the map in various places. You’ve all but forgotten what the map is supposed to represent – the capital maybe?

“You have Yunho down as well. Why’s that?” Seonghwa peers at Hongjoong’s unreadable expression, blinking up from the paper. Hongjoong glances between the two of you without saying anything for several moments.

“In case of emergency.”

“What kind of emergency are you expecting if you’d bring Yunho off the ship that’s not far from the arena?”

Arena. That’s a word that has been popping up incessantly since this conversation began, but no one has bothered to give you an explanation as to why it’s being thrown around so much. In fact, no one has bothered to tell you much of the plan at all or what the end goal is. It just seems to be an unspoken understanding between Hongjoong and Seonghwa, and it makes you feel like nothing more than a setpiece in the conversation.

“The arena is currently run by Vladimir the Bloody.”

That catches your attention.

“I know him,” you cut in, feeling more awake all of a sudden. “Well, not like personally know him, but I ran a file on him while I was in the military.”

“Did you?” Hongjoong regards you with curious eyes. You bob your head in confirmation with little enthusiasm and drag your tongue over your bottom lip before motioning down at the map.

“He’s technically the reason I was branded a traitor. The files I stole – there centered around a black market deal between the King of Eros and Vladimir’s crew.”

“Corruption in the military? Who would have thought?” Hongjoong’s tone is as biting as it is sarcastic, and the laugh that follows holds the same emotion. “What was Vladimir getting out of it?”

“Full sanction for any and all of his dealings. In return, he would sell out fellow pirate crews to the military officials nearby.”

Seonghwa scoffs upon hearing your explanation, arms falling to the edge of the desk as he leans over it to look Hongjoong more evenly in the eye.

“Which is why the arena is still up and running. The military shut it down for illegal gambling and cage fighting when it was under Commander Song. But if it’s under different leadership now… under Vladimir’s leadership when he has full sanction–”

“The military won’t bat an eyelash in his direction as long as he gives them what they want,” Hongjoong interrupts, nodding a few times in agreement. “Which makes this confrontation infinitely more difficult. Vladimir has never had respect for other crews, but… to sell them out? Have them murdered? Would he do that?”

“Would you?” Seonghwa’s question is spoken in a smooth and even tone. You blink away from Hongjoong, not wanting to know the answer, and he never provides a verbal one anyway, to your great relief.

“I need to be in the forward team, but Mingi can’t come with me.”

“Mingi can’t come at all,” Seonghwa insists. Perhaps you’re just stupid or slow, but the pieces finally seem to click in your mind.

“For six years, he fought in an arena here on Kebos before they were outlawed. He would win every single time. Every fight. Flawless record. By the time he was sixteen, he was at the top of everyone’s bet lists and at the top of the arena, which was expected because his father was in charge of the arena. He had won countless matches and beaten plenty of people. Kill after kill. Apparently, he was always eager to fight and kill. He was taught that people die every day, so no life is valuable or worthy of mercy. Death is natural, and it isn’t wrong to end someone’s life even if they’ve done nothing wrong. His body count… it’s unimaginable.”

“This arena – the one Vladimir runs – is it the same one Mingi fought in?”

Hongjoong and Seonghwa exchange a quick glance before turning to you with equally surprised and confused expressions.

“Jo-Jongho told me about… the – yeah. He told me,” you stammer, drawing your hands close to your chest. Hongjoong hums in acknowledgment and brings a hand up to thumb at his chin.

“Seonghwa, you and Yeosang can come with me in the forward team. Y/N, I’ll send you with Wooyoung and Yunho.”

“Neither are fighters,” Seonghwa counters. “She’s the only one who can fight on that team.”

“She shouldn’t need to fight if there are no issues.”

“That’s a big if, Hongjoong,” Seonghwa insists, chin dipping a bit.

“What? Now that you’re fucking her, you suddenly doubt her abilities to defend herself?” Hongjoong’s jeering question causes you to choke on saliva, and you cough behind the back of your hand to recover while Seonghwa manages to maintain a flat expression. “If you’re asking why I wouldn’t keep the two of you at my side, that would be too risky. You have to be at my side as my lieutenant, Seonghwa. The best way to keep Y/N safe and out of harm’s way is by–”

“Putting her with people who can defend her.”

“No, it’s by putting her with people who won’t draw attention.”

“You think Wooyoung won’t draw attention?” Seonghwa’s tone rises a little, but it doesn’t daunt Hongjoong in the slightest. The shorter man merely stands up straight and folds his arms over his chest while staring Seonghwa down.

“San and Jongho can quell Mingi, Jongho better than anyone. This isn’t going to be easy for anybody on the crew, but Mingi is a priority. The two of you need to be safe, yes, but trust that I put at least a semblance of faith in your abilities to stay alive and not be taken captive. Jongho has to go with Mingi, but Yunho cannot go with them. Yeosang only trusts Yunho, Jongho, and myself to keep Wooyoung safe in his stead but refuses to let Wooyoung be anywhere near Mingi in case of emergencies. I need Yeosang at my side with you for intimidation purposes only. Yes, Y/N and San could switch places, and she could go with Jongho and Mingi. However, in the event that Mingi suffers an episode, San is better equipped to help Jongho handle it than Y/N is, considering she’s never experienced it firsthand. Don’t you see that this is the best course of action?”

“I do, Captain,” Seonghwa responds, tone flat with defeat. “But revenge isn’t the best course of action no matter what.”

“I understand that you fear for my safety, Hwa. We both know that I didn’t become the most feared pirate in the universe without having to take risks. I need information. I need to know who my information broker really was, why they lied, why I was given a dead lead, and where the hell Jin is right now. Be it luck or fate, Y/N has given us precious time to get the answers to these questions. If anyone is going to have those answers, it’s going to be Vladimir. We’ll reconvene tomorrow to tie up the last few stray threads. The two of you can return to your… activities now. I need to make some calls.”

Seonghwa doesn’t offer an answer, but he doesn’t need to because Hongjoong turns away from the desk to move to another part of the office. You don’t wait for either of them to usher you out again, heading for the door without a word. Seonghwa follows you, but not without looking back at Hongjoong’s pacing form at the other end of the room. You dare to breach the topic once the door to Hongjoong’s room hisses shut.

“Are you worried?”

“Worried isn’t the right word for it,” Seonghwa admits, bringing a hand up to rub at the back of his neck. “I fear that this might not end the way Hongjoong hopes it to.”

“Why do you say that?”

“Consider this… if you were forced to suddenly returned to the military without warning, forced back into the place you hate the most and have the most regrets, how would you feel?” Seonghwa pauses, but it isn’t to let you formulate an answer. He turns to look at Hongjoong’s door and blinks at the metal with an expression void of emotion. “He’s going to unmake Mingi if he isn’t careful. I don’t think he realizes that.”

✧✧✧ a/n: i almost said surprise but then remembered that i am in fact 30 minutes late sdfjuisdhfuih okay but anyway! hello yes! first chapter of act four! how do we feel! i feel like not a lot happened? this acts as a big set up for what’s to come and there are so many hints and crumbs scattered throughout this chapter asfoijsdofij okay but anyway yes i hope you guys enjoy lemme know what you think :3 oH ALSO HI YES SEXY NEW BANNER!!!!!!!

if you would like to, you can take the survey here! if you would like to be added to the taglist, just let me know!

This work is licensed under a Creative Commons Attribution-NonCommercial-NoDerivatives 4.0 International License.

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redjoey1992 · 3 days ago

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If there was one deleted character that I wanted to bring back for my Wish AU rewrite, I would have to go with Charo. Rather than make her Queen Amaya's pet cat, She is now Princess Celeste's pet cat, and I would make her speak but only to Celeste. Think Iago from Aladdin.

So last year, Disney's Wish was supposed to be a celebration of Disney's 100th year anniversary, and everybody was hyped up. Sadly, when it finally got released, people were very, and I mean very, disappointed with it. Yes, Wish has its flaws, and some parts felt rushed undet it's 80 to 90 minute running time, but for me personally, I thought it was good and it could've been better. For everyone else, it was a disappointment.

Then, people keep saying that they were robbed because of two concept arts that have been breaking the internet for over a year. One of them is the idea of a romantic plot of Asha and Starboy, a humanized version of the Star from the original movie (unaware that the humanized star is actually the younger version of Asha's Grandfather and the idea of them having a romance is gross, plus it's questionable because Stars are thousands and thousands of years old). The other is King Magnifico and Queen Amaya as a villain power couple. While those two sound like nice ideas, but in reality, they don't add anything new to it or could make it even more convoluted that it already is. Nevertheless, those two concept art ideas have been the main focus on everybody's Wish rewrite fanfic.

So, if I ever wanted to do a Wish rewrite fanfic, the first thing I do is change the main hero and villain.

ARMAAN:

Armaan is a starry-eyed and optimistic 11-year-old boy from the kingdom of Rosas. He’s energetic and passionate, sometimes rushing into a situation without thinking about it first. Although he considers himself a fish out of water because he has lived in Rosas for almost a year, he’s brave and hopeful and always puts a positive spin on any situation. He deeply loves and cares for his family and friends, especially his paternal grandfather, Sabino.

Armaan was born in a small region in North Africa to a philosopher from Rosas named Tomás and a seamstress named Sakina. Growing up, Armaan would hear his father lecture him about the stars and their connection to all living things. He would also spend time reading books, drawing, and building things. When he was nine years old, his father passed away from an unknown disease. Soon after his father’s death, Armaan and Sakina moved to the Kingdom of Rosas, where they now live with Sabino. He then made friends with seven kids named Ruth (10), Marri (16), Simon (15), Hal (10), Safi (11), Bazeema (12), and Dario (10).

At first, he had a high opinion of Princess Celeste like everybody else in Rosas, but he is rather curious about how she has the power to grant wishes and how the people of Rosas have great admiration towards her. He entered a contest to meet Princess Celeste for only one day on her 18th birthday. He saw this because of Sabino’s wish to inspire people with his music, and his grandfather’s 100th birthday is also on the same day as Celeste’s 18th birthday/wishing ceremony. Armaan won, much to his excitement.

The hangout with Princess Celeste started great in a little brother/big sister way. Then Celeste takes Armaan to her chambers, where she shows him the collection of all the wishes from the people of Rosas. When Armaan saw Sabino’s wish, he asked Celeste to grant it. But she rejected his plea. Celeste also revealed a dark secret to him. She erased everybody’s memories of the citizens’ wishes, rendering them devoid of any ambition and making them rely on her and adore her, which causes tensions between her and Armaan, which escalates into Celeste passing on Sabino’s wish.

Later that night, Armaan feels like he disappointed Sabino on his 100th birthday. Sabino then comes in to cheer him up and shows him to a wishing tree he and Tomás used to go to and says that sometimes wishing on a star can inspire him not to give up hope, something that he gave to Tomás when he was young. Soon, Armaan takes his grandfather’s advice and makes a desperate wish upon a star, hoping everyone in Rosas can make their wishes come true.

His wish is highly tremendous and pure, and he is granted the star itself, which takes on the form of an anthropomorphic ball of light whose name will be called Star. This will lead Armaan on a noble adventure to free all the wishes from Celeste’s wicked clutches.

So, I wanted to make Armaan’s relationship with Sabino as the emotional core as well making Sabino show him the wishing tree just like how he showed his father before him (it's taken from a deleted scene). Based on a friend's suggestion, I would have Armaan be more curious about Princess Celeste, her power to grant wishes, and the people of Rosas' greater admiration towards her, making Celeste’s villainous reveal more shocking. I based Armaan’s character design off of Ravi Cabot-Conyers (my ideal voice actor for him), Mickey Mouse from "The Sorceror's Apprentice" segment from Fantasia, Pinocchio, and Aladdin. There's also a little bit of Antonio from Encanto.

PRINCESS CELESTE:

Princess Celeste is the most beautiful, charismatic, and beloved 18-year-old princess of Rosas and the only daughter of Queen Amaya. From the day she was born, she was enchanted to be attractive, sing beautifully, and be beloved by all, but she was born with magical powers. As the princess grows up, she's been learning and mastering all kinds of magic and sorcery and studying astrology and alchemy. But her one extraordinary magic power is that she can grant the wishes of her subjects. She has that ability because, unbeknownst to everyone, including herself, Celeste is born a half-human/half-star hybrid. She considers her magic superior to all others to the point where she lets the power go to her head, leading her to develop a giant, vain, self-absorbed ego.

One day, people forget what they want or desire. Then, on her 15th birthday, Princess Celeste declares that she will be willing to help her people by announcing a ceremonial event where she'll grant only one wish every year on her birthday.

Unbeknownst to the people, including her mother, Celeste is wicked, selfish, devious, callous, narcissistic, and sociopathic. She cast a powerful and dangerous spell that will steal the memories of her people’s wishes and keep them sealed and locked away in her study room forever. Celeste can only grant wishes that would benefit her and keep the rest locked up, especially those that she deems a threat to her. She created the wish-granting ceremony every year on her birthday to maintain her power, beauty, and influence and have people feed her ego. She learned that spell from a book containing forbidden magic, which she uses as a contingency in case something threatens her power.

Despite her potent magic and enchanting appearance, Princess Celeste harbors an intense jealousy and resentment towards her mother, Queen Amaya, who is more humble and caring to the people of Rosas, leaving Celeste to feel overshadowed by her and will do anything to make herself the center of attention.

On her 18th birthday, she can only invite one person to spend one day with her so she can grant one special wish for the winner. When an 11-year-old boy named Armaan was declared the winner, things went wonderfully in a little brother/big sister way. Then she showed him the millions of wishes in her study room. Armaan discovers his grandfather's wish to inspire people to play the guitar. Once he tells her about her grandfather's wish, she assumes that it might be dangerous, although Sabino is mainly kind and harmless.

Then Armaan starts questioning why Celeste only grants one wish while many others will never for another year instead of being given back so the people who initially wished them could achieve them themselves. Celeste tells him that they can't do it on their own because it's unachievable, and they come to her because she's the only one who can grant the wishes to come true, so they don't have to worry about doing it on their own. Armaan is shocked and surprised by how she did it so people would forget the best memories about themselves, with an enraged Celeste declaring that she's the only one who decides what the people deserve. So, she refused to grant Sabino's wish at the wishing ceremony, leaving Armaan crushed and heartbroken.

Later that night, Armaan wished on a star for help, and the star, revealed to be a little, exciting, boundless ball of energy, answered. Celeste saw the light it caused and believed that someone had threatened her power. All this would lead to the events of her downward spiral, building up to her inevitable defeat.

My idea for Princess Celeste is to create an evil Disney Princess, which is something that Disney has never done before, so having a Disney Princess be the main villain sounds more refreshing. Plus, it would make more sense for her to grant only one wish a year every year on her birthday so she can have the people of Rosas feed her ego. I based Princess Celeste's character design off of Chloë Grace Moretz (my ideal voice actor for her), Princess Aurora from Sleeping Beauty, and King Magnifico. Some of her character was inspired by Princess Fiorimonde from the fairy tale "The Necklace of Princess Fiorimonde" and it's a very awesome read. You guys really need to check it out.

More ideas of my Wish rewrite will be coming soon.

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hongism · 4 years ago

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mists of celeste ➻ twenty-three

➻ pairing: ??? x fem reader ➻ genre: space au, pirate au, space pirate!ateez, angst, eventual smut ➻ Word Count: 6.2k ➻ Rating: M ➻ Warnings: language, violence, guns and weaponry, blood, future warnings tba ➻ summary: Sneaking aboard the ship of a renowned space pirate may not have been the best idea, but you’ll have to make do with what fate has handed to you

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act three ➻ part five

Everything feels almost too calm. There is a sense of serenity surrounding the lake tonight, and you can’t place it, but you imagine it must have something to do with the man sitting cross-legged across from you. He bears white garments like you, soaked through on the bottoms, and you keep cracking an eye open to gauge his expression. His eyelids are pressed shut, but there’s no tension in his brow. Peace. He’s at peace. That’s not something you have felt all too often while here, so it’s strange to see Seonghwa that way. The stillness of his face gives you a chance to drag your gaze over his features; the sharp curve of his jaw, gentle slope of his nose and lips, and the long eyelashes that nearly brush against his cheeks.

“Close your eyes.” He catches you off-guard, mostly because his eyes are still shut when he says the words. You press your lips into a small frown, lower lip pouting out, but squeeze your eyes shut anyway. “There’s no reason to make a face.”

You dare to crack an eye open, finding Seonghwa’s gaze on you now.

“I’ve told you to focus four times now. You keep getting distracted. Do I need to wear a mask? Is my face that distracting?” Seonghwa teases. He lifts his chin a little as he blinks at you. His gaze is innocent, but you know he’s well aware of what he’s doing.

“What’s the point of all this again? Isn’t it taking away from our sleep?”

Seonghwa clicks his tongue against the roof of his mouth and shakes his head ever so slightly.

“It’s the Dreamscape for a reason. Your body is resting even if your mind is awake in here, so technically, you’re still sleeping.”

You really wish there was some way to kick him in the real world. Maybe if you glare at him hard enough it’ll work—just a quick kick.

“Why are you giving me that face?”

“Hm?” You purse your lips and lift your brows, desperately trying to hide your growing smile. Seonghwa just huffs a sigh out in response, followed by another order to focus more.

You’re still smiling when you press your palms against the bed of the shallow lake. The pebbles underneath are smooth against your skin, and you almost lose yourself in the sensation when Seonghwa’s voice cuts through the air again.

“Imagine the water being pushed away from your hands. Don’t think of it as you doing the pushing, let the water do the work.”

Seonghwa makes it sound so easy, but the longer you sit there, the more you realize that absolutely nothing is going to happen. You only try for a couple of minutes before giving up and tugging your hands back out of the water.

“Maybe I’m not a Siren after all.”

Seonghwa releases a loud laugh, head falling back as he snorts towards the sky.

“Nice try. Don’t play coy, and try again. Most Sirens have the ability to do this.”

“Emphasis on most.”

“You seem to be above average. I mean, you’re above average in other… departments, so I’m sure it carries over.”

“Above average? Excuse you, I would like to think that I am far above average in other departments!”

“I was talking about sparring, princess. Where is your mind headed?”

“I hate you.”

“Sure you do. Now, come on. I just want to see how strong you are mentally because that’s what these abilities are based upon. It’s all psychic, not physical.”

“I’ve done it before… used whatever these abilities are. Changing something about my body, I don’t know what, but making bullets pass through me without hitting me? Only when my life is being threatened though.”

Seonghwa squints a bit at you. He is suspiciously quiet, and you’re about to question him when he stands up all of a sudden. He closes the distance between the two of you in an instant, fingers latching onto your throat. You choke at the impact and fall back to the rocks.

“Th-This isn’t as s-sexy as you think it is,” you mutter as you bring a hand up to grip Seonghwa’s wrist. Seonghwa lets another laugh loose, this one much quieter than the last, and his fingers tighten a tad.

“If your life has to be threatened just to see the extent of your powers, then I can do that.”

“G-God, you’re insufferable.” You aren’t sure why he would think that choking you is the best way to get you to focus, because all you can think about is how damn hard it is to breathe instead. Still, you press your palms flat against the rocks once more and desperately try to push the water away. It hits in that moment, a sense of familiarity and deja vu, and your mind slips back into a memory rather than the pull of the water on your fingertips.

The breath leaves your lungs, and you gasp for air, cradling your bleeding nose with careful fingers. Her knees drop onto your abdomen while her hands go for your throat. You try to swat her hands away from you with the bloodied hand, but she seems to have even more strength than before. You stretch a hand out to her sternum, trying to reach for the cloak over her skin. The lack of air is making your head spin though, and you can’t focus enough to use your abilities on her. Your fingers tremble and shake against her clothes.

Fucking… work. Come on. Just fucking phase.

Spots dance on the edge of your vision, and your hand falls to your side limply.

The last time you were in this position, you weren’t able to do anything. You couldn’t defend yourself. Your fingers tighten on the pebbles. Then the pressure of Seonghwa’s grip dissipates, and you jerk upwards, gasping for air.

“Good job!” His tone is bright and cheerful, like he didn’t just try to choke you into unconsciousness. You would laugh if you weren’t still attempting to catch your breath.

“Are you congratulating me on almost dying?”

“Oh hush, you’re fine. I barely choked you. You pushed the water away though. It didn’t last a long time, but that isn’t as important. You still managed to do it, which means you at least have the ability. Now we can move onto tr–”

“Hey! Hello, Y/N, are you there? Did I lose your brain somewhere?”

“Huh?” You speak before your brain catches up, the vivid memory of the previous night dissipating bit by bit until you remember that you are in fact awake and not still in the Dreamscape with Seonghwa. Long fingers snap in front of your face. You jolt a little and turn to the man at your side, his peach hair blending in a bit with the sky around his head.

“You’ve been off in la-la land for a while now,” Yunho chuckles. His smile is soft as he looks down at you, and you can almost sense a cheeky comment coming, so you speak before he has the chance.

“I was lost in thought and thinking of other things, that’s all,” you say through a sigh. “I’m sorry.”

“That much is obvious, but there’s no need to be sorry.”

You pull your stare off Yunho and glance around the little marketplace again. San isn’t with the two of you today – something about staying back to help Jongho and Mingi run some maintenance checks on the ship – but you aren’t alone. Wooyoung and Yeosang came along today, and you can only be grateful that Yeosang is too preoccupied with Wooyoung to sling insults your way. The pair keeps a significant distance from you and Yunho; they walk along the row of stalls on the other side of the street, Wooyoung’s arm linked through Yeosang’s. He has something in his hand, though you can’t tell what it is from this distance. All you can see is Wooyoung wrapping said item around Yeosang’s wrist, then a clear and bright laugh falls from his lips, one you can hear from across the road. Yeosang smiles down at the action, teeth flashing, and the action looks so foreign on Yeosang’s features that you glare at the man a little.

“Damn, I’ve never seen someone look so bitter at the sight of happiness,” Yunho snorts, drawing your attention back to him. A scoff slips past your lips.

“It’s not like that. I just don’t understand Yeosang.” Yunho seems to understand what you mean, nodding slightly as he hums in response. His gaze trails over to where Wooyoung and Yeosang stand.

“Yeosang is complicated and hard to understand. You shouldn’t take it personally. He hates everyone at first, then he continues to act like he hates them to save face and seem tough. Plus, he’s bitter that you’re a better shot than he is. His pride is weak in that regard. Besides, no one is as close as Yeosang and Wooyoung are. They’re basically family at this point, had no one but each other for a long time before joining the crew. They bring out the best in each other, so of course, Wooyoung will bring out the softer side of Yeosang.”

You don’t respond, just letting a sigh slip through, and Yunho smiles a bit at your reply or lack thereof. He comes to a sudden halt and releases a noise of surprise. For a moment, you think that something has happened to either Yeosang or Wooyoung, but Yunho is faced in the opposite direction, towards a small stall.

“Y/N, Y/N, come here!” He ushers you closer to the stall, hand around your bicep, and points down at something that looks like a plant. “They have hyacinth root! It’s extremely rare. I’m surprised that they have it. Excuse me – could we have a handful of your hyacinth roots?”

“What’s so important about a root?” You inquire as the person behind the stall begins to pick out a few of the plants.

“You can crush them up with peppermint leaves to create a paste that, when consumed, will slow your heart rate but keep you alive. It makes you seem dead when in actuality, you aren’t. It typically lasts between seven and ten minutes. Good for getaways or dupes.”

“Have you ever used it before?”

“Once, yeah. Hongjoong had a mission somewhere in the Yuki system, but it was so long ago that I can’t really remember where we were. Not too long after I joined the crew actually. Hongjoong came to me with the root and told me to make the concoction. That was the first I’d heard of it. It’s always handy to keep a few around in case of emergencies, especially since they’re hard to come by, but I haven’t been able to find any for quite some time now.” You watch Yunho quietly exchange money with the vendor and take the bag of roots. He pulls away from the stall after a few moments and softly spoken thanks.

The silence that follows isn’t uncomfortable in any sense, but your thoughts won’t quiet down enough to let you relax. Every lingering stare from the townspeople makes you second-guess yourself, and they aren’t exactly shy about looking at you or Yunho as they walk past.

“Hey, I have a question,” you say after a few minutes. “I talked with Jongho about it before, but I wanted to ask about Mingi. From your perspective, is it… is it possible to undo the mental conditioning he went through?” Part of you is genuinely curious about Mingi’s condition and what Yunho thinks about it, but you’re also asking for yourself. If it were up to you, you would erase every lingering touch of the military and push it all out of your mind. If Yunho knows of a way to do that, then you want it.

“It’s very possible,” Yunho hums. “Just like undoing what the military did to you.” You open your mouth to protest, but there’s no use because Yunho just shifts and smiles at you. The smile is knowing and understanding, like he’s picked your brain apart in seconds. “Everything is reversible except for death, right? Mingi is just a tough nut to crack. He wants to learn and understand emotions, but he doesn’t want to let go of what tethers him to the part of him that misunderstands and can’t process emotions like you or me. He wants to abandon his title as the Brute of Kebos, but he doesn’t want to completely lose that part of him. It’s a hard dichotomy to dissect. Hating yourself but clinging to what makes you the thing you hate. Not once have I ever heard him call himself the Brute of Kebos. So… I think that the only way to break him loose of those chains is to have something like a rebirth. A rebirth of the Brute of Kebos, a new version, one different than the last.”

“Why isn’t he allowed off the ship? Is it because we’re on Kebos? Is Hongjoong worried that there will be another incident?”

Yunho freezes, head snapping towards you so fast that it looks painful. His lips part, but no sound comes out for several seconds.

“How do you know about that?”

“I-I – uh, Jongho just m-mentioned it. He didn’t tell me anything, only that there was an incident.” Yunho’s hand closes tight around your arm again, this time much more painful than the last. It almost burns, and you had no idea that Yunho was this strong until now.

“You shouldn’t ask about it,” he hisses out through gritted teeth. You’ve never seen this expression on his face, this gleam in his eyes. He doesn’t seem angry in the slightest, and that’s what sends your thoughts into a scramble. Merely sad. “That’s between you and Hongjoong if you want to talk about it, and it’s on him to tell you about it.”

“O-Okay, yeah, um, I’ll drop it,” you stammer out, averting your eyes, so you don’t have to see Yunho’s pained expression any longer. “We can… we can try to confront a bit of my trauma now like – like you’d wanted to do.” Yunho’s hand falls away from your arm, but the ache continues to reside, and you bring your other hand up to rub at the skin there. Yunho notices your movements, expression falling into guilt. “Yunho?” You press, desperate to just change the damn subject now.

“Y-Yeah, sorry, let’s get started. First, can you tell me some things that comfort you? Things to think about if you’re feeling panicked or anxious? A sight, smell, taste, sound, feel.”

A soft-sided grin, rounded cheeks, and bright eyes. You don’t even ask for the image to come to mind, yet it does as soon as Yunho mentions comfort. You’re frantic as you try to push the thought away and replace it with something else that comforts you, but everything you think of surrounds Jisung.

“Um, the stars on a clear night.”

Jisung.

“The smell of cherry wood and sugar.”

Jisung.

“Sound of fire crackling.”

Jisung.

“The feel of a-a rough hand in – in mine.”

Jisung.

“The taste of honey… and vanilla on soft lips.”

Jisung.

Your voice trails off and dies in a whisper. The heat of Yunho’s stare is on you. Out the corner of your eye, you spot the barest hint of a smile on his lips, but it disappears when he speaks again, tone quieter to match yours.

“Think about the last time you were here. Do you remember it?”

Vague. It’s vague and foggy. A cold night. Stars. Warm fire. Even warmer next to him.

“Y-Yes.” You nod.

“Can you recall it for me? It doesn’t have to be detailed; you can only tell me if you want. Whatever you want to tell me and are comfortable telling me.”

“I last came here with a friend on business. One of my teammates, someone in my unit. Just the two of us.”

“Three constellations. The ones I taught you last time. Come on! If you name them all, I’ll give you something.” Jisung’s laugh is clear as it rings through the air, so loud and bright that it could dispel every cloud in the sky.

“Oh yeah? What are you gonna give me?” You roll your eyes ever so slightly. Only enough for Jisung to see it and scoff at your gesture, and he sits up to hit your arm with the back of his hand. You laugh, hair sprawled out across the ground. Jisung hesitates there. His expression melts, and his gaze is so gentle and full of emotion that you feel a deep pang in your chest. “S-Stop looking at me like that. It’s weird.”

Jisung doesn’t respond right away; instead, he leans down over you and blocks your view of the sky. All you see in that moment is him. You exhale, breath fogging in the air between you, and Jisung dips in to press his lips against yours. Soft lips. The taste of honey and vanilla. Stars hanging high in the sky. Jisung’s calloused hand reaching out and finding yours. Cherry wood and sugar on your nose. A fire crackling behind you.

“I decided to betray the military on that trip. I thought it would protect him. That I was doing it for him. He hated the military more than anything, but it was the only thing he – we had. I thought I could dismantle them on my own. I was so stupid and foolish to think that I could.”

“Has this all been for him then? The papers as well?”

“No. No, the papers were for someone else. The friend I came here with is still alive, at least I think he is. I haven’t – haven’t seen him or heard from him in three years.”

“Who are the papers for then?” Yunho’s tone isn’t pressing; it’s hesitant and cautious, yet it somehow still urges you to answer.

“I lost someone the night I killed the king. That’s who the papers are for.” You dare to glance up at Yunho. Maybe it’s an attempt to see if there’s disgust or hatred on his face, but his brows are furrowed and sloped with concern instead. His lips part to say something in response. A loud shout interrupts him before he gets the chance though. The two of you whip around to find the source of the sound. It’s Wooyoung, hand raised high in the air as he drags Yeosang along with him and approaches you and Yunho.

“Hey! We need to go!” Wooyoung says, tone loud even when he gets close to you. “Lieutenant just called me over the comms. He said we need to get back to the ship as fast as possible.”

“Did something happen?” Yunho asks, but Wooyoung merely shakes his head.

“Don’t know. He didn’t say. He sounded mad though.”

“Shit, let’s go then.” Yunho is quick to spin on his heel and start walking back the way you came. To your surprise, Yeosang pulls away from Wooyoung to fall into step with Yunho instead, and you stay back with Wooyoung.

“He really didn’t explain anything?” You ask, tilting your head to look at the dark-haired man. Wooyoung purses his lips.

“No, he didn’t. But if he’s upset, then that means Captain is going to be a nightmare to deal with.”

“You think?”

“I know it. When Seonghwa is this mad, Hongjoong is always ten times worse.” Wooyoung turns away, bringing a hand up to rub at the skin under his collar, and you watch the movements with nervous eyes.

“H-Has he–”

“No.” Wooyoung doesn’t let you finish the thought, but he seems to know what’s on your mind. He drops his hand to his side again. “He’s never hurt me, and he never will. It just reminds me of my previous own–captains. My previous captains. I don’t do well when any of the crew gets upset or angry because of that.”

“O-Oh,” you exhale. It almost sounds like a noise of relief. Wooyoung doesn’t push the conversation further, and neither do you, so the two of you trail after Yeosang and Yunho in silence until you reach the hangar where the ship resides.

Seonghwa is waiting for you there, just outside the airlock. Wooyoung was correct – he looks upset based upon the way the muscles in his face are tightened and drawn together, but also because of his rigid posture.

“You all need to go to the bridge immediately,” he says, not waiting for you to get close before speaking.

“Can’t I drop this off first?” Yunho asks as he lifts his satchel off his hip.

“It wasn’t a recommendation, Yunho. It was a command. Bridge, now.”

Yunho doesn’t even try to argue. He dips his head and follows Yeosang onto the ship. You and Wooyoung move to do the same, but Seonghwa catches Wooyuong by the arm as he’s climbing the stairs to the airlock.

“Are you alright? Did anyone bother you in the town?” Seonghwa’s tone slips back to its regular warmth and soft concern.

“Yeah, I’m okay. No one bothered me.”

Seonghwa offers a small nod, tongue darting out to moisten his lips before he lets Wooyoung continue onto the ship. The lieutenant falls into step with you as you climb the stairs behind Wooyoung, but he doesn’t speak at all.

“What? You’re not gonna ask me if I’m okay?” You inquire, tone teasing and light. Seonghwa doesn’t respond with his regular mirth or teasing though.

“I know you can handle yourself just fine,” he mutters back.

“What’s going on?”

“Hongjoong is upset.”

“Why?” Wooyoung asks, turning around to face the two of you. Seonghwa clicks his tongue against the roof of his mouth, shaking his head back and forth a bit.

“Eavesdropping is bad.”

“Have I ever really been good though?” Wooyoung lets out a quiet laugh and rubs the back of his neck. It’s meant to be a lighthearted joke, probably to get Seonghwa to loosen up a little, but Seonghwa doesn’t seem fazed in the slightest.

“The lead died.”

“Did the trail die or the Siren?” Wooyoung asks, hand falling away from his neck as his expression grows more serious. A sigh slips past Seonghwa’s lips.

“The lead who was supposed to be here has been dead for thirty years. It was bad information and a dupe to cover tracks.”

“Oh…” Wooyoung’s mood deflates before your eyes. His shoulders slump forward a little, and he faces forward again. Seonghwa frowns at his back before continuing to speak to you.

“Hongjoong is furious. It would be best if we all just bite our tongues no matter what so he doesn’t lash out.”

“That sounds like a good idea,” Wooyoung murmurs. Something about the whole situation doesn’t feel quite right though, nor does it sit well with you. You harden your gaze on Seonghwa.

“Is it really true? About the Siren?”

“Why do you think I would lie to Wooyoung?” Seonghwa barely shifts to look at you, a sharp glare that makes his face almost unrecognizable landing on you. His eyes and tone are colder than they’ve ever been with you, and it’s enough to make you regret even opening your mouth. You near the bridge feeling worse than before, Seonghwa’s angered presence lingering at your side as he continues to walk alongside you.

Actually stepping onto the bridge somehow makes your heart plummet further. The air is tenser than you can imagine, and you’re bringing up the rear with Seonghwa apparently, because everyone else already stands in front of the captain’s chair looking both uncomfortable and nervous. You round the edge of the chair to find Hongjoong sitting there. He seems calm more than anything else, hair a new shade of blue and laying loosely over his forehead. It makes him seem younger and more innocent, but the gleam in his eyes shows how furious he truly is. Seonghwa moves to stand beside him, whereas you hurry to stand alongside Wooyoung.

“During one of our meetings today, a captain of one of our allied crews showed us some obituaries and news reports concerning the Siren we were led to believe was here. That Siren has apparently been dead for nearly thirty years. The lead I was given was a dupe, which means that my information broker is a traitor and working for someone else.” Hongjoong somehow manages to maintain a steady and flat tone. His nostrils flare a bit with each word, so it’s evident that he’s on the brink of letting the anger slip through.

You glance down the line of the crew to find Jongho and Mingi, gauging their reactions to Hongjoong’s spike in anger. Jongho seems to be just fine; his expression is blank, and he looks at Hongjoong like nothing is wrong. Mingi, on the other hand, can’t stop shifting his weight from foot to foot. His brows are so closely knit that you can barely see the skin between them, and he won’t look up from the floor. You aren’t the only one who notices the discomfort Mingi is going through. Seonghwa tilts his head towards Hongjoong, speaking quietly, but thanks to the silence lingering over the rest of the bridge, you all can hear his words loud and clear.

“Calm down.”

It’s the wrong thing to say apparently, because Hongjoong pushes up from his seat and stares Seonghwa down like the man just shot him.

“Why should I calm down when we’re running out of fucking time?” Hongjoong yells, voice booming through the room in a shocking way. “When we’ve been wasting time on a damn false lead because we were betrayed yet again? What part of me should be fucking calm then? How long until someone fucking sells us out?” He expects an answer from Seonghwa, but the man doesn’t provide one. Instead, he huffs air through his teeth and steps closer to Hongjoong. His fingers close around the collar of Hongjoong’s long brown coat, tugging him forward just enough to hiss his next words in the captain’s face.

“You should be calm because Mingi is present.” Seonghwa pushes Hongjoong away from him, and the shorter man falls back to his chair with little to no reaction. He looks down at the floor, avoiding everyone’s wide-eyed stares while Seonghwa turns to address the crew.

“Everyone is dismissed,” he states, tone as flat as he can manage. Yunho is the first to move, then Yeosang, who places a hand on Wooyoung’s hip and guides him off the bridge. Jongho follows without a word, yet Mingi doesn’t move. He hasn’t budged one bit, still in the same position he was in before. “Everyone is dismissed, Mingi. That includes you.”

The sharply spoken command spurs Mingi to move. He nods once, but the movement is stilted and awkward, before following Jongho off the bridge. You find yourself in a similar position to the one Mingi was just in. Your feet don’t want to move, and you can’t get yourself to even turn your head away from Seonghwa and Hongjoong. The lieutenant shifts to look at you. Your heart pounds against the confines of your ribcage. A hand brushes your lower back, and you nearly jump out of your skin because you hadn’t seen anyone come up behind you. San blinks back at you, nudging you forward a little. You take the hint and let him guide you off the bridge.

“You looked scared shitless,” he mutters once you’re out of earshot of Hongjoong and Seonghwa.

“Just a bit surprised,” you whisper back.

“We don’t see Hongjoong like that often. In fact, it’s been well over a year since he seemed that angry.” San doesn’t elaborate past that. You don’t ask him too either, too caught up in the thought of Hongjoong’s unprecedented anger. San’s hand stays on your back throughout the walk back to your rooms, but you don’t speak. It leaves you alone with your thoughts, which are a jumbled mess of confusion at this point between all that’s happened today.

And at the forefront of it all? Jisung.

You just want to pour your heart out to someone and get it all off your chest, everything you remember starting from the minute you joined the military up until the assassination of the king. You want to get it off your chest; you’re sick of bottling it up and not being able to talk about it. You don’t know why you’re thinking that way all of a sudden. You’ve spent so long thinking about yourself and how you can’t be vulnerable or weak in front of anyone. The hand on your back remains. The slightest pressure against your skin, guiding you and pushing you forward. It’s merely driving you down the corridor, yet it feels like more than that. San could’ve moved his hand at any point, but he didn’t, and you only realize why when you reach the door to your room.

He wants to comfort you. To show you that he is here for you even if you fail to realize it.

As his hand slips away from your back, you twist and catch his wrist between your fingers. San blinks at you with wide eyes.

“I t-think – I think I’m ready to tell you about my past in the military,” you spit out in a rush. It’s a miracle you only stuttered a couple of times because your heart is pounding and making your heart rate accelerate.

“You don’t have to,” San whispers, obviously caught off-guard. “I don’t want you to feel like I expect that from you. Because I don’t. I meant what I said yesterday.”

“I know, I know. I just – I want to trust you. I mean, I trust you. I do. I trust you, and I want to trust you with this as well.”

San’s face melts into a soft smile. “Okay. Is it alright if I come in?” He motions towards your door, and you nod quickly, tapping at the keypad to let him in. He waits for you to step through the door first then follows you to the bed. He sits as far away from you as he can without falling off the mattress, hand pressed to the comforter between you. You expected some level of awkwardness or tension to come from this conversation. While you’re panicked and nervous about exposing this part of you, San’s warm and intense gaze does nothing but ease your worries.

“You… you don’t really know much about me aside from the fact that I killed the King of Eros, and that I’m trying to pardon someone.” You bring your hands into your lap, tugging at the skin around your thumbnail to avoid looking at San. “I joined the military at 14.”

“Recruit number seventeen. Name and age?” A cold tone that tears through your skin and confidence with its iciness, and yet you pull your shoulders back and stand up a little straighter.

“L/N Y/N, age 14.”

“I think th-that something happened then because I can’t remember my life before going to the recruitment office. I don’t know if they… if they did something to me or – I just don’t know, but I wasn’t fit to be a recruit. They took me anyway because they needed recruits. I was small and weak. I got injured more often than other people, and no one ever tried to help me because I was a runt. I was thrown into a small unit of only six people. All of us were young and misfits, kids who didn’t fit the military mold, and they never expected much from us.”

“Alright, we’re the mess of recruits, okay? They lumped us together because they think we’ll fail, but we won’t! So we gotta prove them wrong, little lady. Understood?” The boy jabs his thumb at his chest as he says the words, smile falling to emphasize his serious tone. You nod several times in response.

“The only thing I was ever good at was shooting. So… I dedicated everything I had to being the best at shooting. It paid off, of course. They never moved me from my team though, because no other commander wanted me in their unit, but I shot up in ranks and quickly became known for being the best sniper in the division. Somehow that turned into being the best shooter in the military of Eros. I never wanted that title, and I never wanted them to like me. I don’t know why I joined in all honesty. They must’ve taken that away from me when I joined, but eventually it became a desire to protect my team. They became my family. Then I ruined it. I stole some classified documents that could’ve destroyed the military from the inside out, but I got caught. Branded a traitor and stuck in jail for what I did. They weren’t going to kill me then though. One of my friends came to visit me in jail and promised to fix things.”

“Jisung.” You glance at the man, his face slightly shrouded by the steel bars between you. “Jisung, I–”

“I thought we were gonna work through this together, Y/N.” The stinging of his disappointment almost hurts worse than the brand on the inside of your wrist. If you could twist them, you would, but the cuffs around your wrists prevent you from doing so.

“I know…” You can’t finish your train of thought.

“I, uh, I don’t know what I was going to say. I don’t know what to say.”

“I’m sorry, Jisung.”

“Four years. I don’t want it to end like this.” Jisung shakes his head a little bit.

“They aren’t going to kill me. Just – just the brand a-and being kicked out of the military.”

“I’m going to fix this, Y/N. They can’t – this isn’t right. I won’t let them do this.”

“Jisung, you can’t – they – the damage is already done.”

“Then they’ll have to kill me. I won’t let them do this. Not to you, Y/N. You can’t ask me to sit on the sidelines this time.”

“Once I was let out, they expected me to leave and never come back. That’s what I was planning to do, but I found out that one of my teammates told the king that he had organized everything. The theft, the plans to dismantle the military, even claimed that he plotted to kill the king. It wasn’t true at the time, but it didn’t matter. He earned a public execution sentence for it. Because of me. Because I thought I could fix things and make it better for my team. Instead, I got our leader killed. They all blamed me except for one, and that was almost worse. I would’ve rather had them all hate me than have one defend me. They all left Eros as soon as they could. Didn’t even wait for the execution. I stayed and went back to the palace where the execution was being held with the intention of stopping it. I was going to shoot the king before they killed my friend. I thought it was meant to be penance for what I caused. To take away the guilt I was feeling and redeem myself. Then they killed him, and I was too late. I hesitated. He died. So I killed the king and left. I should’ve taken my gun with me, but I left it. I was t-too emotional to remember to grab it. They picked up the traces of my fingerprints and traced it back to me. So yeah… there’s my sob story.”

You exhale shakily. Now that it’s all out there, you feel light and airy. Almost like you’re floating, but not in a good or happy way. Next thing you know, San is pulling you against his chest, and your face collides with his shoulder as he wraps a hand around the back of your head. The action causes a choked sob to slip out. Neither of you were expecting the sound, and you didn’t even feel the tears in your eyes until San pulled you against him. Shaky hands move to grip the back of his shirt.

“I know you still blame yourself,” he murmurs against your hair. “I can tell. At some point, you have to face the truth though, Y/N. And the truth is that you did not make those choices for whoever your friend was. He made those choices, and he alone made them. It sounds like he made them because he cared about you as much as you cared about him. Enough to die for you.”

“B-But I… I didn’t – I didn’t die for him. I should’ve told the truth. I should’ve sacrificed myself. I d-didn’t,” you cry, blinking against San’s shoulder.

“You did sacrifice for him. That’s not something that you should blame yourself for because it’s not your fault. I’ll remind you of that every single day if I have to. Until you believe it.”

“W-Why?”

“Because it’s what you deserve, Y/N. It’s what you deserve.”

✧✧✧ a/n: ahahsdfjkhaskjdfs im late but here oh my god i didn’t expect it to take so long i even cut 1k out of the outline and moved it to shorten yet aslfidjiosdfj here we are welp anyway i hope you guys enjoy and let me know what you think of this one 🤧

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