#wish I'd had the nerve to do this a few years ago

[cheadarchesse]

So I talked to the financial aid people at my new school and things are better than expected

Friends, I will be getting $3k OVER the cost of tuition and that's just in grants. If I'm careful and strategic, I can cut down how many days I'm at my soul sucking job!

I'm over the moon rn. Thought I would need to pay them or scramble for every scholarship posted just to make ends meet

[rcmclachlan]

Relative Value (buck/tommy)

"And I feel for her, you know? I really do. The dissolution of a relationship, especially a marriage, feels like you're drowning in hot tar, and you spend every waking moment kicking your way to the surface to try and breathe. But if she brings up her divorce again while I'm in the middle of peeing? I'm going to divorce her head from her body."

Buck makes a face at the thought of Maddie's decapitated coworker. "Please don't send the 118 to that scene. I'm not so great with entrails these days. Send the 147—they deserve it after they botched that extrication on Monday." 

Maddie laughs, the sound tinny but comfortingly familiar coming through his phone's speakers. She'd propped her phone on Jee-Yun's dresser halfway through the call so she could put away laundry while she talked, and for the last five minutes he's been watching her fold Jee's clothes like she's being judged at the Olympics. 

It's nice to see that hasn't changed. Maddie should've been in jail years ago for the way she loads a dishwasher, but when it comes to laundry she's a goddamn wizard. When he was younger, his parents saddled him with taking out the trash and doing the dishes, but putting away the laundry was always Maddie's chore. She actually enjoyed it, the weirdo. She used to tell him the first whiff of warm Snuggle right out of the dryer was a cure-all. Also, she can fold a fitted sheet in under ten seconds. He'd timed her once.

Maddie takes an eye-wateringly orange shirt out of the laundry basket and with three decisive motions turns it into a perfect rectangle. If Jee ever decides she wants to go deer hunting, she'll be all set. "Since when are you not good with entrails?" 

"Since that guy was ripped in half last week."

It'd easily been the grizzliest car crash he'd ever been called to. It made the 405 pileup a few years back look like Disney on Ice. About halfway through tagging and bagging almost a dozen casualties strewn all over the westbound lanes of the Pomona Freeway, the guy responsible for the crash snapped awake while Hen and Chimney were setting up and drove off in a panic. The top-half of the motorist stuck under his car was dragged maybe sixty feet, and Buck had a front row seat to the sight of the poor guy's nerves and vasculature trailing behind him like squid tentacles before the driver came to a stop by hitting yet another car. 

"I'm also not eating spaghetti for the foreseeable future, FYI," he adds.

Maddie wrinkles her nose. "Okay, changing the subject: when do you leave again?"

It wouldn't be an overstatement to say the smile that question invokes explodes over his face. He feels it happen; the spark eats the fuse so quickly there's barely any lead-up and his cheeks burn from the sheer magnitude of the blast. 

"You look deranged," Maddie says, laughing.

"I feel deranged." He's been like this all week and it's starting to scare everyone. Chimney keeps leaving pamphlets for Clozaril in his locker. "Tomorrow morning. We're picking up the bird right after we do a coffee run."

"I wish my boyfriend was whisking me away to the mountains for a romantic getaway." Maddie heaves a theatrical sigh. "My husband says the best he can do is Shake Shack."

The whole thing is absolutely bonkers. He'd been minding his own business, half-watching a documentary about volcanoes with his feet in Tommy's lap, when they showed some insanely beautiful footage of Mount Rainier. And although his mind was focused on completing level 29 of Euclidea, his mouth was busy saying, "I've always wanted to go there." 

Thumb digging into Buck's instep, Tommy had made a thoughtful sound and said, "I'd tapped a buddy of mine to get us into Griffith Observatory after hours, but I like your idea way better. Let's do it."

If someone had told Buck 1.0 that someday a beast of a man would be flying him by helicopter to the Cascades for their two-year anniversary, he would've laughed his way into a pneumothorax. And then he would've tried to fuck his nurse. 

He looks across the living room to where their bags have been sitting, fully packed, since last night, and grins. "Tell Chim he needs to step up his game. You're worth Zankou, at least."

Maddie snorts. "Gee, thanks."

Behind her, there's unexpected movement, and every muscle in his body locks up as his heart stops in a moment of brief, blinding terror. 

It's stupid to feel this way after seven years, but a little part of him is still waiting for Doug to crawl out of the shadows like a wraith to finish what he tried to do. He's spent many a sleepless night spiraling to the soundtrack of Chimney's desperate, Do you know he's dead for sure? Did you see a body?

Buck did see his body, but a little voice sometimes whispers to him from some deep, dark place at two in the morning: it was freezing that day. It could've slowed the bleeding, could've kept him alive long enough to go to a hospital. You don't know what happened after the ambulance left with him. What if he survived? What if he's out there right now, just biding his time?

Which are bad and ridiculous thoughts to have because he knows that monster is dead, and frankly he's got better things to think about than Doug, who's absolutely having his skin torn off in hell right now—especially since his adorable, perfect niece is the one who came into the room. 

"Say hi to your uncle, Jee," Maddie says, smiling. In her hands, a pair of polka dot leggings becomes a polka dot brick with hospital corners. 

Jee-Yun jumps a little like she can't quite see him, and Maddie goes over to the dresser to obligingly tilt the camera down. 

"Hi, Uncle Buck." Jee-Yun waves, then rises an inch or two higher in the frame, and he realizes she's standing on her tiptoes. She cranes her head, moving it a bit from side to side like she's looking for something. After a few seconds, she drops back down, grimacing in disappointment.

He looks over his shoulder, but no one's there. "Sorry, kiddo, it's just me."

"Just you is fine, always," Maddie immediately pipes up, and he ducks his head with a smile. It's always nice to hear her say that. "It's just that… well, she had a question and we weren't sure if you were the one we should be asking."

Buck grins. "Lay it on me, Jee."

It's always a little hilarious to watch how Jee reacts when the spotlight's on her. She bounces and twirls a little, and her whale-spout pigtails move with her. For someone getting ready to enter kindergarten, she's got the stage presence of a Broadway star. "Uncle Buck, how do airplanes fly when they're so big and heavy?"

He opens his mouth to answer her, but there's nothing there, just an empty pocket of air that tastes vaguely like the ham sandwich he had for lunch. He closes his mouth with a click, stymied. He could've sworn he knew this one. Something about lift and drag?

"Jee, I-I'm sorry. I don't know off the top of my head. I could look it up for you?"

A little groan escapes her, but it turns into a shriek when a tie-dyed sweatshirt comes winging from off-camera and lands on her head. Jee wrestles the shirt away, static making her hair cling to her face, which she swipes with a whine. 

"That's why I wanted to ask Uncle Tommy!"

Buck has forgotten a lot about the tsunami. Time has softened the memory of how warm the water was, how it shoved its way into his mouth and nostrils like it was trying to find a way inside his veins, and that it was filled with so much debris it scored the insides of his cheeks bloody. But the one thing he never lost was how his feet went out from under him when that first wave hit like a freight train. He hasn't been able to ride a roller coaster since: he doesn't see the need to pay to experience the feeling of free fall again. He remembers every second of it like it just happened. 

He may be sitting on the couch with his feet firmly on the floor, but his stomach is thrilling at the familiar sensation of being completely unmoored. Only instead of being dragged into the dark, he's being pulled up into endless blue. 

Breathless with stratospheric joy, he digs his trembling fingers into his knees like it's going to do anything to keep him grounded, and chokes out, "Who, Jee?"

The look Jee turns on the camera is so confused that Buck isn't sure he was even using real words just then. It could've been a jumble of sounds falling from his mouth like aquarium gravel. 

"Uncle Tommy," Jee says, with the patient air of someone who forgot they were talking to an idiot. "It's okay if you don't know about airplanes, Uncle Buck. You drive fire trucks."

He's pretty sure he was just insulted. Behind Jee, Maddie's wide-eyed and mouthing an ecstatic oh my god! 

"Tell you what. When—" he swallows thickly, overcome "—Uncle Tommy wakes up from his nap, I'll have him call you and he can tell you all about how planes stay up in the air."

She mulls it over, and he can see the outline of her tongue poking the inside of her cheek like she's swishing the offer around in her mouth. Finally, she gives him two decisive nods of her head that has her pigtails bouncing. "Okay. When's that?"

"I-I don't know. Soon." If the lightning had struck a few feet away from him instead of dead-on, he thinks it would've felt like this. Any second now he's going to vibrate out of his skin and scar Jee for life. "Maybe I should go check on him." 

"I think that's a good idea," Maddie says cheerfully, coming into the foreground. Her eyes are glossy and red, and even with two screens and several miles between them it feels like she's about to wrap him up in the warmest hug. "Why don't we let you go for now? Uncle Tommy can give us a buzz later."

"Yeah, t-that sounds like a plan." He knows he's rocking the deranged look again, except it's somehow so much worse. He doesn't care. He hopes his face gets stuck like this. When he rolls into the station two weeks from tomorrow, he's going to take every pamphlet Chimney shoves at him and eat them.

Maddie's grin is threatening to split her face in half. "Give Uncle Tommy a big kiss from us."

He's going to do way more than that. "You bet. Bye, Mads. Bye, Jee!"

The very second the call ends, he's on his feet and practically running down the hall. Tommy had been coming off a rough 24 earlier when he'd sloppily kissed Buck and then staggered into the bedroom. It's been almost three hours and Buck hasn't heard a peep since. 

Buck makes sure to lift the bedroom door when he opens it so the hinges don't creak, and when he sees Tommy—sprawled diagonally across the mattress with his jeans still on and enough drool soaked into the pillowcase to fill a bathtub—his knees decide it's the perfect time to stop working. He clutches the door frame so he doesn't crumble to the floor under the weight of all this euphoria.

Jee thinks of Tommy as family. It's not hard to figure out the logic she must be using to get there: she has an Uncle Buck, who has had a Tommy for as long as she's been making real memories, and therefore… 

He can't help but wonder who else in the world is operating on that same intel. Jee has no doubt told the teachers at her kindergarten about her mom and dad and her amazingly cool Uncle Buck, but maybe she's also told them about her other uncle, who always lets her ride on his shoulders when they go to the park and who talks to her like she's a forty-seven-year old at brunch. Maybe she's told kids at the playground about the uncle who knows why planes stay in the air and who folded himself into a pretzel because she wanted him to sit next to her at the kids' table last Friendsgiving. Maybe she's drawn shitty pictures in crayon of two stick figures holding hands under a smiling sun, and when her classmates ask who they're supposed to be, she tells them, "That's my Uncle Buck and my Uncle Tommy." 

Inhaling shakily, he makes himself move from the doorway to the bed, crawling in as gingerly as he can. It's all for nothing, though, because Tommy cracks an eye open and fixes it on him. Buck scrunches his face up in apology, but Tommy just smiles a little and tugs Buck down, pressing his face into the space between Buck's neck and shoulder and settling with a hum.

Buck slides a hand into his hair and holds him close, breathing in old sweat and a hint of his own shampoo. "I love you, Uncle Tommy."

"If this is a new kink, I'm going to need at least another two hours of sleep before I'm prepared to tackle it," Tommy mumbles. 

Choking on laughter, Buck presses a kiss to the side of his head and wonders if it's possible to die of happiness. "Not quite. Your niece has a question about airplanes and wants you to call her when you wake up."

When there's no immediate answer, Buck is sure Tommy's fallen back to sleep, but then Tommy shifts a little in his arms, presses a kiss to his shoulder, and murmurs warmly, "Will do."

[cybersunnie]

18+ / MDNI cock warming; f!reader (wc 992) with PATRICK ZWEIG

There was a story about the tortoise and the hare, and Patrick Zweig was the hare. 

Slow and steady wasn't exactly his style. 

He was quick and impulsive. Careless and arrogant. Annoyingly—or admirably?—persistent like the suffocating heat on a hot summer day. If you spared one glance at Patrick, you'd think he was nothing but smug. And he was well aware of all of this, too. He just never cared much about what other people thought of him, to begin with. 

But Patrick loved a challenge, and he sure liked taking his sweet time with you. Or, more accurately, he enjoyed making you squirm.

He'd have his cock stuffed inside your cunt, and tease you with lingering touches and chaste kisses until you caved in and begged him to fuck you. With Patrick, it was all fire and the wrong kind of love. But sometimes, when he felt a little nicer, he just wanted to be close to you, to become one with you, heartbeats linked and breathing the same breath.

And with how poorly he had been doing in his last few matches, he needed that semblance of human connection he had lost years ago.

The night was young, but Patrick was eager to have you. His hungry kisses left your lips raw, and his mouth traveled south and started to nip at your jaw, his nose digging into your cheek. Everything he did was to distract you. Distract you from the burning sensation you felt as his cock stretched you out.

"There you go, atta girl."

Patrick kept a firm grip on your hips, his thumbs caressing the skin there to soothe your nerves. You always got so flustered whenever you tried to take him. And that was because you felt all of him. The tuft of hair on his pubic bone, the veins on his cock. You'd whine, tell him that it was too much, that he was too big, as if your pussy wasn't made for him.

He liked it, though.

Because in the end, you looked so pretty, sitting on his fat cock. 

You heard him groan, low and guttural, and his large hands snaked up to your ribs, stopping just beneath your breasts. His touch was electrifying—everything about him was—and it sent a slight buzz through your body. And the sight of him alone wasn't helping. Patrick's wild hair and deep green eyes and that fucking smirk he never went without. But as much as you wanted to move, you couldn't. He wouldn't allow it. Not yet.

"Fuck, look at you." Patrick slid a hand further up to cup your breast, and you wondered if he could feel your pounding heart. "I could stare at you for hours."

You raised a brow. "I hope that's not the only thing you'll be doing."

"No, no," he said softly, his gaze darting over your face while he let his other hand wander, fingers tracing up your arm and leaving goosebumps in its wake. "But it's tempting."

Patrick watched you roll your eyes, and he chuckled, grasping your hips once again and squeezing. He wished he could just keep his cock inside you all night, your cunt keeping it warm and wet and snug. But you were always too fussy to stay still for long. He supposed that was his fault—he did like spoiling you, after all.

"I have an idea."

Ideas and Patrick Zweig didn't mix well. You learned that early on when you first met him. And as you looked into his eyes, seeing the playful mischief within, you knew you were in for a treat whether you liked it or not. 

He took your silence as an invitation to continue, so he leaned in, his breath hot against your ear and voice velvety, "We should do this in front of a mirror next time." 

Or maybe ideas and Patrick Zweig did mix well.

Your mind started to reel, imagination running wild. But Patrick painted the picture for you like it was something he had been thinking about for a while. 

"You'd have no choice but to look at yourself—to look at just how fucking pretty you are when you're like this," Patrick whispered, his voice beginning to get lost in the heat and longing. "I'd keep your legs spread nice and wide so that you can see how my dick looks stuffed inside your sweet pussy." You squirmed, but his grip tightened around your hips. A silent warning to stay still. "Maybe you'd finally understand why I do this to you every time."

He pulled away from your ear, a hand leaving your hip to caress your cheek, his touch soft despite his calloused palm. All you could do was stare at him with a tight chest. "I care about you, you know," he laughed as if to hide the sincerity behind his words. "I'm not just trying to get a quick fuck. I wanna take my time, stay close to you longer." 

For once, his name tasted sweet on your tongue. "Patrick."

It was a prayer disguised as a whisper, a plea for his words to be true. And he hummed, his lips brushing yours as he uttered your name back. If this was the wrong kind of love, why did it feel so right? Why did he feel so right?

You tried to swallow down your pride. "Please."

"Please, what?" Patrick asked, but he knew what you wanted. He was connected to you. Your thoughts were his, too. "C'mon, use your words, baby."

But you couldn't bring yourself to say more, to accept defeat. You pulled your lips taut.

"No? Nothing?" He tilted his head, and his signature smirk was back. "Well, let me know when you figure it out."

And while Patrick was much like the hare, he knew he needed to take it slow and steady when it came to you. You would surrender to him sooner or later. You always did.

author's note: i have very mixed feelings abt this 😄 ANYWHO i will gladly give patrick everything he needs which is a shower and a bed

UNEDITED — 05.14.2024

[minoment]

ofc ofc ofc, sub!jack sparrow supremacy✨ So I didn't really plan this out, but something about jack getting the cockiness fucked outta him…it just does something to me. I don't mind presentation, so you can keep it gender neutral if you like!! Now i'll proceed to obsessively refresh the 'dom reader' tag until you publish it <3

Pairing: CAPTAIN Jack Sparrow x Dom GN!Reader

Type: Draft

A/N: Posting this because I promised to get it out <3

Minors DNI <3

You and Jack had gotten off on the wrong foot, to say the least. Well, in your opinion. He didn't seem quite so bothered by it, more.. excited? That definitely ticked you off. He was so.. so infuriating.. so carefree. He treated you like some alluringly gorgeous god of war and that he was some un-killable fool who dared question your presence. Like he was the special one who would never ever be shown your wrath. You hated it.

Jack Sparrow was known across the seas as the luckiest, unlucky but admirable alcoholic to ever stumble upon the slippery decks of a ship. You however, were known as a vicious, territorial, almost Nordic pirate who guarded their claimed land with iron and steel. No one dared to venture near your territory, the pure amount of fear had made you almost forgotten to this day. Not that you minded of course. Stories of your cruelty and maliciousness spread an elaboration of what you were truly like, the tales isolating you in an almost comforting sense of loneliness.

You almost wished you had back that loneliness. But no. Of course not. That fool had made sure to never give you a sense of tranquility ever again.

"HELLLOOOO??"

A shouting voice was heard over the waves, it was slightly slurred and incredibly obnoxious for this early hour. The golden sun peeked over the horizon, sending golden slivers dancing across the waters surface.

You grunted softly, opening an eye and slowly picking yourself off the deck of your ship where you had peacefully been napping. You were an intimidating figure, at least 6'4" and toned from years of taming rough oceans. Your skin was tanned and mottled with scars and tattoos. Your braided and decorated hair glowed a fiery auburn in the growing daylight, 'like molten copper' as your late mother used to say.

Silently, you moved over to the ships edge, raking your cold green gaze over the sandy expanse of the small island you were moored next to. And there he was..

That daft moron got himself stranded a few days ago, somehow separating himself from his crew AND the Black Pearl. You had moored here a few weeks prior, reading the stars and waiting for the perfect time to sail back to your hidden cove you called home. He had dragged himself drunkenly out of the sea not 16 hours ago and your tranquil peace had disappeared from that point forward.

You had no intention of helping him, his constant chatting and one-sided conversations making him insufferable. He was doing it on purpose and you knew that, but it got on your nerves either way.

"What tha fuck d'ya want?" You snapped crossly over the well-kept railing of your ship. Your gaze narrowed as a triumphant smirk played across his lips. He was admittedly handsome, you'd give him that.

"Mornin' lovely..." He singsonged flirtatiously, gazing up at you and shielding his eyes from the now fully-risen sun.

You scowled in disapproval, not appreciating this levelling sort of flirtatious friendliness.

"You know.." He continued thoughtfully, mockingly speaking as if you were some sort of Lord, "I'd really like some food and water.. if you'd be so gallant as to spare some?"

You scowled once more and moved away from the railing. As much as it was 'survival of the fittest' and a constant battle with your stubbornly cruel personality, you couldn't watch a man starve to death with your help right in front of him. Besides, apart from being an infuriating pest, he hadn't actually hurt you.

A neatly coiled rope lay near your mast and you picked it up, carrying it back over to the railing. You secured the end firmly to the rail and dropped it down so the other ratty end dipped into the salty water.

"Climb up before I change my fuckin' mind.." You snapped, tilting your head in a sort of aggressive invitation aboard.

Jack wasted no time in scrambling up the rope like a monkey, your powerful grasp steadying his shoulder and body as he helped himself aboard. He stood to the side as you untied the rope and started to reel it up. His hand absentmindedly rubbed where your fingers had gripped his collarbone, his gaze flicking to your veined, clearly weathered hand as it worked the now sodden rope.

You turned and looked down at him, your gaze becoming ever so less furious as he looked back up at you and thanked you for your generosity. For some reason, you felt a little guilty for not letting him on sooner. He looked like a curious little mutt, his beautiful brown eyes seeming to warm you up from the inside out. You bit the inside of your cheek and looked away, scolding yourself for getting in your head. You motioned Jack to follow and brought him below deck.

Your boat was large yet you were the only one on it. It was decorated beautifully, showing off what obvious peace you had by yourself. There were maps and tapestries in some rooms, others having shark skulls and ornately engraved longswords hung up with bent nails. Apparently you were incredibly creative as well as a ruthless killer.

Jack marvelled your boat before his gaze curiously roamed your broad form. His keen eye took note of your clean clothes, the neat Nordic pattern embroidery and the occasional stain of spattered blood. Your belt held pouches and sheathed knives, all made by you. He admired your physique too, the way your muscles flexed under your skin as your opened the heavy door to your main living area. You didn't smell like the usual pirate either. An alluring scent of spices, fabric, seawater and blood seemed to follow you wherever you walked.

Eventually you sat him down, taking note of his ripped clothes and dirty features. You motioned for him to hold out his hands, working in complete silence as you wiped off his hands with a wet rag. The salt water stung a few scratches but Jack patiently held still, letting you wipe off his neck and face area. You almost did this as a sign of respect before standing up and getting him some clean clothes. You held out the rag and the pail of sea water, wordlessly telling him to get dressed and clean the rest of his body. He did as he was hold and you turned, moving to the other side of the cabin to find some stale bread and dried fish for him to eat.

When you finally turned around, he had washed himself and was getting dressed. Only Jacks upper body remained unclothed and your green gaze wandered over his tan skin. He had many bullet and knife wounds, adding up to the lucky part of his reputation. Personally, you found them quite beautiful although you would rather die than admit it.

"Here.." You said gruffly, handing him the plate of foot and a pouch of rainwater off your person. "Rest for a while.."

"Ah.. thank you.." Jack replied, finishing dressing himself and taking the plate and pouch from you. "I knew ya soul would be as beautiful as your pretty face.."

You sighed silently, moving to pick up his discarded clothes. You walked back up to the sunny desk, laying out Jacks clothes so they would dry and be parched of their salty sea smell.

You moved back below deck, your gaze raking over Jacks now-clothed chest and opening your mouth to ask about his scars.

"You really are nothing like the stories say, are ya?" Jack said as he interrupted your train of thought before you could speak and looked from his food to your eyes.

You paused, momentarily re-arranging your thoughts before speaking.

"No I'm not..." You said eventually, motioning to your own chest in reference to his bullet wound scars. "But you're definitely as lucky as the tales tell.."

Jack looked down and smiled slightly to himself, unable to form a response to that. It felt odd to be complimented by such a stoic and feared persona like yourself.

"What are ya really like then?" Jack asked, drinking the last of his water and letting you take the plate from him.

"I- don't really know.." You replied, stowing the things away before turning back to him. "Well no.. I just can't remember.."

"Why not?" Jack asked with a tilt of his head. "You look like you'd have quite the personality.."

"Near death experience can blanch the personality from your soul I s'pose.." You shrug, leaning back against the ships wall and crossing your arms. You watched him closely. "You definitely have had your fair share of near death experiences, how come you're still an arrogant shit?" You say flatly, making Jack laugh.

"You've got quite the mouth huh?" He smirked, his gaze flicking to your scarred lips in a much more suggestive way than before.

You were a little taken aback by his suddenness but you regained control of yourself and narrowed your eyes. "Answer my question.."

"I guess I'm just better than you.." Jack shrugged with a cocky smirk, obviously trying to rile you up. The annoying thing was, it was working. You gritted your teeth, your jaw tensing.

Jack easily picked up on that and grinned, a soft chuckle escaping him. He knew this was a dangerous game; that only made him want to play it more. It certainly solidified his reputation of the stupidly brave captain.

"You aren't better than me.." You scowled, your hands moving behind you to grip the wooden counter as he began to approach you.

"Oh but I am.." Jack smirked. "You would have killed me by now if I were anyone else in front of you.. am I special?"

The audacity he had. It made your blood boil, but nonetheless you stayed against the wall, watching him like a hawk.

"It makes me wonder.." Jack continued, moving ever closer so his body was mere inches from yours and his calloused hand reached up to cup your face. He leant up and in a little closer, his lips only centimetres from yours. "A great pirate like you.. maybe you've gone soft.. maybe you could even be a whore and-"

That word set something ablaze inside of you, a boiling pit of rage and frustration overflowing within your guts. The only thing you could think about was teaching this cocky brat a lesson. Just before he could finish the rest of his insulting sentence, before he could kiss you; you snapped.

You pushed him back, slamming him against the opposite wall and knocking the breath out of him. Before Jack could get a single word or gasp out of his mouth, you crashed your lips against his and silenced him. His eyes widened in shock before he relaxed. He attempted to bring his hands up to cup your face but you gripped his wrists and slammed them against the wall with your iron grasp. This was a lesson.

You bit down on his lower lip and squeezed his wrists tighter, earning a low whine of protest from Jack as your larger body pushed him up against the wall. Soon your hands left his wrists and he got the message, holding onto the edge of the counter lining the ships wall. Jack gripped the polished wood so hard he thought his rings would splinter the expensive timber. His breath hitched as you wrapped your hand around his neck, only needing one to pleasurably restrict his blood flow.

Heat pooled between his legs when your hand tightened around his neck, a choked whine escaping his lips as lightheaded pleasure filled his senses. You took this opportunity to slide your tongue into his mouth, making his legs almost buckle. Your kisses became even more aggressive and vicious as you tasted him, pinning him roughly up against the wall. The fiery taste of rum and salt on his lips spurred you on as Jack mewled in your grasp. You were so good, it made him lose himself almost instantly. The way you squeezed his neck, how your rough fingers pressed against his arteries so he could breathe easily through his nose while you ravaged his now kiss-bitten lips.. he wanted more, oh so much more...

Jacks greed eventually got the better of him and he clawed at your free hand, trying to move it towards his hips. You growled low in your throat, warning him. He didn't listen, desperate for more pleasure as he dug his nails into your hand. You pulled away with a rough curse, gripping his dreaded locks and dragging him away from the wall and down into the next room; your quarters.

The man yelped in a pleasurable sort of pain, opening his mouth to protest. You didn't let him, throwing him down into the messy nest of furs, fabrics, and blankets that was your bed. You held Jack down on his stomach, one hand pressing down between his shoulder blades and your knee in the small of his back. Nothing could be heard except for Jacks laboured breathing, the gentle lapping of the waves against the hull, and the metallic noise of you unclasping your belt.

You dragged the thick, worn, leather strap from around your waist before wrapping his tightly around Jacks wrists. He watched as you wrapped the belt further around an iron ring connected to the wall, unable to move his hands. Now that he was restrained and laying on his stomach in your bed, you could begin his real lesson.

Jack buried his face in the fabrics, your scent making arousal rock through his body in steady waves; yet it was also weirdly comforting to him. He felt you over him, your knees on either side of his hips as you leant down to bite and kiss at his neck.

You moved his hair ever so gently to the side, your lips and teeth leaving dark hickeys all over his sweet, salty skin. Jacks breathing became heavy once more as he tried to hide this fact by muffling his face in the furs. Eventually it became too hot and Jack couldn't breathe, so he just lay his head to the side and took it; not even bothering to preserve his dignity or hide his rough pants and gasps anymore when you suckled marks onto his skin.

You were marking Jack as yours and the very thought made his hips stutter forward ever so slightly. A small whine escaped his lips and you scowled, one hand moving to pull his hips up away from the bed. Jack was now face down ass up, a humiliated blush spreading over his features as he panted. One of your hands was in his hair, tightly gripping his locks and keeping his neck exposed while you marked him. The other held his hips, keeping him pressed against your body but unable to grind down against the sheets where he needed it most.

A choked breath was pushed from Jacks lips as he realized exactly what situation he was in. You weren't going to give him any sort of pleasure. You were going to hold him up like this and mark him up until he was a pleading mess. Jack didn't want that, he was greedy for more, anything more; and you knew it.

Jacks heavy panting and gasps filled the room, occasionally breaking it up with low keening whines as you tugged his hair and marked his neck. Eventually he couldn't take this torture any longer.

"P-please.. Indulge me, I beg you.." Jack panted, swallowing and licking his lips. His own breaking, reedy voice surprised him. "Need more..."

Jack lay his head to the side as you pulled away from his neck, letting out a low groan as you squeezed his hips and silently warned him not to try and thrust back down against the bed.

You decided to treat him knowing that his stubborn greed and wants would get both of you nowhere. So instead of taking away what he wanted, you would give it to him. Oh yes you would, you would give him what he wanted until he was a squirming, moaning mess just pleading for you to stop.

Jack practically melted in your grasp once more as your hot mouth came in contact with the sensitive skin of his neck. Your sharp teeth grazed over the fresh bruises, your tongue gliding over their wake.

The sensation distracted his attention long enough for you to slip your large, rough hands into the soft cotton fabric of his pants. the low whine echoing in his throat turned into a strangled moan as your hand wrapped around his stiff, leaking shaft.

He buried his face in the furs once more, his hips trembling as your mouth continued to work at his neck and your hand tightened around his cock. Jack could feel himself dripping into your tight fist as he bit down on the thick wool of a blanket, his eyes rolling back in pure ecstasy. Nonetheless, he remained obedient and kept his hips as still as possible while your hand worked him into oblivion.

[loonylooly]

at this point i'm wondering what sarah is thinking when writing her love interests, like ok it's clear she finds them hot but like....are they good people

Rhys:

UTM lap dance shenanigans

throwing Feyre into danger constantly (Weaver, destroying cauldron, getting the book from Adriata, etc etc)

Still not doing jack shit about wing clippings in Illyria?? Emerie is right there, Rhysand, go enforce your damn laws

Insulting his wife's sister constantly

Almost killed his wife's sister cause she dared give her important medical information

Locked Lucien (MY BOY!!) in the house of wind

Locked Nesta in the house of wind

Didn't give Mor any warning that time he made her face her abusers and she cried i think (ngl i forgot most of it)

Ignoring Hewn City even tho...Kier is like the only bad guy we've seen from there?? Surely there's decent people in Hewn City, don't gotta make everyone suffer

Nesta windhaven kidnapping intervention so she stops spending Rhys' money (if it was really about her own sake, they would've put a stop to it much earlier)

Seemingly alienates everyone in Feyre's life that could and would stand up to Rhys for Feyre's sake. Lucien? Nah, shoo. Nesta? Nah, shoo. Weird thought but Tarquin? Yeah, makes her steal his book.

And last but DEFINITELY not least; demon baby wife death

HE COULD'VE TOLD FEYRE... OR ATLEAST NOT THREATENED TO KILL HER SISTER FOR TELLING HER WHEN HE HOULD'VE TOLD HER IN THE FIRST PLACE??

THERE'S PROBABLY MORE BUT MOVING ON

Cassian:

Barely ever stands up for Nesta in the IC

Aids in kidnapping Nesta to Windhaven so she stops spending whysand's money

Laughs at Nesta when she falls down the stairs

Aids in punishing Nesta for daring to tell Feyre important medical info

Constantly going agaisnt Nesta's wishes and trying to "save her" when she doesn't want him to

That one time Azriel asked Nesta if Cass had pushed her down the stairs...Like are we gonna ignore that?? Personally I'd have a quarter life crisis if my closest friend, who is like my sibling and has known me most of our lives, seriously entertained the idea that i would physically assault the girl I like

general aggressiveness all of ACOSF

aids in bulldozing Nesta's apartment

Rowan goddamn Whitehorn (Who I've yet to see people bashing him somehow,,, HoF rowan was like if ACOSF cassian had a horrific murder baby

Left his pregnant mate alone during a war cause he wanted to prove himself....like..idk man if i had the choice between war and taking care of my pregnant wife i'd pick the wife (did he know she was pregnant? i've kind of forgotten by now)

Rowan's kid would've been hundreds of years older than Aelin.....just think abt that

Literally everything he did to Aelin during training in HoF

Their argument where he PUNCHED HER IN THE FACE

Threatened to whip Aelin...I repeat....Threatened to whip Aelin, an ex-slave....

Told Aelin it'd be better if she died 10 years ago (unprovoked?? bitch you met her like 2 weeks ago just cause she's getting on your nerves doesn't mean you gotta wish DEATH upon her)

Literally was relieved to find out she was only 19 because if she was a few years older she could've been THE CHILD OF HIS BEST FRIEND.

No issue with marrying the cousin of his best friend's child....Imagine if he hadn't met Aelin first.. If he'd met Aedion first, Aelin would've always been the relative of his friend's son to him

FOR THE RECORD i hate all of the SJM age gaps but rowan and aelin's specifically irks me because Aelin LITERALLY CALLS HIM OLD throughout the WHOLE SERIES

Literally tells Aelin he doesn't care about what she's been through and that she is nothing to him after she confronts him for leaving her

Puts Luca in danger by sticking him on to a frozen lake with a monster inside where he'll DIE if Aelin can't save him

Funnily enough, some of the only seemingly decent person guys in SJM 1. Are completely forgotten about in the books or 2. SJM had to make them violently unlikeable

Like we've got:

Tarquin, seemed like a pretty good guy, rightfully pissed that the IC stole his family heirloom, shows up like twice in the books (LET HIM COME BACK SARAH I LOVE HIM)

Tamlin, was pretty decent in book 1, was made violently unlikeable in book 2 onwards

Chaol, very strong morals, generally a good person, loves his wife, made violently unlikeable and boring in late CoM, HoF, and QoS (ToD is one of my favorite books in the series, will praise ToD till the day I die, my boy EARNED his own book)

Aedion, seemed like a good person, strong morals, spent years trading his dignity for the sake of Terrasen, loved his cousin above all else, made violently unlikable in KoA (even tho I think he was justified in being angry about it, i'd be SO pissed)

Sartaq, good guy, strong morals, Nesryn's chapters were some of my favorites in ToD, Sartaq is one of my favorite SJM love interests, i'll never forgive author lady for forgetting about him in KoA (tho i guess she forgot about everyone from ToD? Yrene and Chaol are the only important ones, she barely even mentions Nesryn even though Nesryn's BEEN an integral part of the gang since QoS, giving her the Suki from ATLA treatment)

[thecameronchronicles]

After School Special

TW: Smut. Language. Public sex. Degrading language (teasing). Spanking. 

SUMMARY: JJ doing a favor for Kiara leads to an afternoon delight. 

WORD COUNT: 1600

REQUESTED

Can you do one where Jj goes to pick up reader from Kook Academy and they hook up in the back of the building please!

After School Special

JJs POV

It wasn't the first time I'd seen her. Not even recently. But it was the first time I had in her uniform. Knee high socks and that little plaid skirt, buttons at the mercy of her breasts beneath, and every single pair of eyes taking stock of her whenever they thought she didn't notice. But she didn't only notice, she lived for it. Well aware all eyes were on her. As mine were no exception. Jesus, how couldn't they be? She bent just slightly and you learned just how she preferred lace to cotton. And that smirk when she knew you were watching her was just as devilish as the innocence behind her own eyes for the need for attention. But whether she wanted it in true admiration such as this or as something to pass the time, mine was among the brigade. Shameless descent of her exposed skin that prompted the most sinful of conceptions causing my jaw to clench and my fingers to match. Once stilling my cock to behave, I moved to the direction of her at the back of the Kook academy, leaning up against the stone, as her fellow silver spoon aficionados parted when seeing me. 

"JJ? Where's Kie?"

"Your cousin asked me to come and get you…" She rolled her eyes, cocking her hip as my gaze couldn't help but follow. How was this the same girl who stood beneath my shoulders a few summers ago? Too shy to meet my eyes and now glared at them as if to challenge me?

"I'd rather walk."

"Back to The Cut?"

"I'm not going to The Cut. I don't like it there…it smells and it's dirty…" 

"It has character." I added. "Don't worry, you can even invite one of your meatheads to sit beneath you so you don't get dirty…" But something in her switched to my comment. Not the invitation she saw it as, she moved to me. 

"What if I want to get dirty?" She asked while her fingers danced on my shirt, my heart pounding beneath her touch. Yes, I'd noticed her 'mature' over this last year. A girl to a woman. Sensual to sexual, seventeen to eighteen and wearing the title of adulthood with a middle finger to her daddy issues. Ones she apparently wanted to act on at every given chance. 

"You just said-"

"Maybe it takes the right person…" She hinted, her fingers continuing even lower as I cocked my jaw. 

"Let's stop before you get ahead of yourself, there princess. This is not gonna happen. I'm taking you back to The Chateau until Kie is done working. And I'm then you're not my problem anymore…"

She was now more aggressive, that small window of isolation fleeting as I turned away. With a quick wrap to my bicep, she had me against the wall. Half of which was possible by my lack of fighting against her as I was curious to know what her ambition had been. After all, I could have even have dragged her along with me if I wished. 

"What now-"

"I see the way you look at me JJ…You want to know how I'd feel wrapped around your cock, don't you?" I couldn't believe she was saying these words. She used to blush whenever she heard Kiara or one of us other Pogues say anything even remotely age appropriate for us. And now she put any of our former comments to shame as she was so brazen now. All with a come hither look to match. 

"It would be so easy to touch me JJ…aren't you curious how wet you make me?" 

"I already have an idea…" She pushed herself even closer against me. I was certain she could feel every single nerve of my body, every beat of my heart she made erratic, the formation of my cock hardening by the second. She knew. 

"You have no clue, JJ…" I swear the way she said my name was unique to all those in prior addresses. It wasn't to reprimand or dictate. It was to seduce and tease. It was to promise and offer. 

"None of the Kook boys helping you get rid of this attitude?"

"I don't need a Kook boy…" Her lips captivated my ear, "I need you." Her hand ran over my seam, leaving any question to my arousal in dismissal as her smirk widened. 

"I need you inside me." Her hands had dismantled my belt and her hand was within my boxers before I could object. As badly as I want to focus on her touch, no matter, and maybe even especially, for how bold she had been about it, all I could picture was how many other guys got to know this. If I had any chance to keep from these thoughts consuming me, I had to take charge. 

"You wanna play games, princess?" I asked while taking her against the stone making up the rear of the school, her arrogance rivaled by my dominance as I lifted her leg to my hip. 

"I just want you to fuck me, JJ…" Her words held an instant affect on me. I could have come in two pumps alone by her request. But I wanted to make this last. So I took my time. And she would just have to endure it. 

"You don't know what you want. You wouldn't even know how to handle me…"

"Wouldn't you want to teach me? Train my body to know you?" She pulled me closer, ghosting her lips with my own as I was fighting every nerve in my body to act on it. And yet, the ability I had to hold this over on her was greater than any high. 

"It's already automatically soaked when you're near me, JJ. It's almost painful…" 

"Must ruin a lot of your panties…" I tessed, voice losing confidence as my banter faded to necessity. My dominance was dwindling as my fingers came to contact to that that fabric. Such innocent lace on such a sinful owner. 

"Every pair-" The idea was too much. My lips had taken hers as my fingers were quick to ascend from her hips to her chest as I pulled her against me. I could hear Kiara's warnings and threats ,but they were silenced when her hands tried for my belt. As I held her wrists in my hands, I was at a crossroads. If I allowed myself to sink into this luet, there would be no going back. 

She forced me to consider her in choosing by a soft kiss that quickly turned French. A slow tongue coaxing my own outwards until her panties were torn from her hip. 

"You let anyone know how dirty you are taking it like this and you won't get to come." I assisted this with a hand over her mouth as she would nod, my cock steady in my hand as I prepared myself for her. When she turned back to look, I reset my grip to her jaw and neck to remind her who held the dominance as she would gasp before ultimately submitting to me as I slipped inside of her. 

"Oh…." She breathed in relief, her nails clawing at the walk in front of her as I became quickly lost in how she took me. Tight. Deep. Warm. She was heaven and hell in each thrust. 

"Make you wanna come already, JJ?" She teased as my hand slipped to the wall for stability as I was reminded of her need to be kept in check. 

"Stop sounding like such a slut. You are already moaning like one…and I'll make sure you come like one…" 

"Please���" She set her head against my shoulder as my fingers were quick to unbutton her uniform, tearing the final buttons so I could feel those full breasts beneath my grasp. I used them to hold her closer in to me. 

"I wanna come JJ…please…make me come for you…" Her words strengthened my cock's force as I drove it deeper into her. And I still needed more. I pushed her harder into the wall but took her to face me until I could kiss her, fuxkijf her against her school as she endured it as I'd directed. 

"That's the spot, JJ…" She confessed as I nodded. 

"I know, princess. My spot, now." I focus on that sensitivity, my fingers at her clit and my cock quickening still as I kept her quiet as distant voices and conversations would set me as dominant. 

"You're gonna take all my cum? Tight little pussy gonna take all of me?"

"All of it." She validated. 

"Should fill your mouth for being so dirty."

"Next time, I promise…please come inside me this time, JJ…please I'm so close…" She gasped as I nodded. 

"I know baby…you're trembling…" She nodded before both hands came to either of my wrists; one at her neck and another between her thighs, as we remained this was as that pleasure built for us both. 

"JJ!" She gasped as her name fell from my mouth as well. Never before had I felt such a force behind my release. And I knew I never would again. 

She was forbidden. She was desperate. But now, she was mine…

TAGLIST: @hopebaker @iovdrew @penny4yourthoughts @magnificantmermaid @pickingviolets @lovedetlost @trikigirl271 @maybankslover @slut4starkey @slvtherinseeker @obxiskewl @obxxrxfes @bluesongbird @slut-era @ailee-celeste @rafesbae @camilynn @sweetestdesire @pankhoeforlife @pankowperfection

[inkiest-silly]

I’m feeling silly and ima just- time to post about MY VER of “if Vincent survived the fire” or shortened to STF

STF vince has cut down on his smoking, he isn't addicted anymore due to having hospitalized for a while and unable to do any packs! He also wears layers over his body and hands so it's less uncomfortable Being his hands are burned - his hard to do things without it feeling weird He is working to upgrade his bistro, and im planning on like Adding a few other characters be he's gonna have a bigger waiting staff - bring its gonna be a bigger establishment His chefs still work for him

His chefs still work for him - cherrie is loyal as hell so definitely not leaving He never got over his love for rody,he feels resentment for what rody did to him- but he just couldn't let go of the man He hasn't seen him in ages- but he sometimes wonders what in the world he's doing now Thoughts lke "Is he happy with what he did to me? Does he think im dead and is happy with it?"

He wears his glasses all the time now- he is half blind so he just, does now. He can't afford to not see well,so he keeps them on They aren't used to Vince with glasses or-even the scars In the back, he wears long sleeved shirts instead and thick gloves-Vince stutters on his words and his voice is a little fucked up and raspy due to rody cutting his throat with a bottle

Talking for a long time hurts his throat, he is still trying to fix some things about himself He isn't as harsh on his employees Other than remmie. Remmie is remmie. He learned his lesson about keeping his house with his establishment He lives only a few minutes away from the new place He walks home Why?

Bc he thinks it's good for strengthening his mussles again And it is So he keeps doing it In the rain? Umbrella. But whenever he is out in the rain- he's reminded of the moment when he had to dry rody off and give him an umbrella-He enjoys the rain on his skin, it's cooling and nice He's taking care of himself only to try and get back to proper health to do more So he isn't as scrawny (He still hates eating but he forced himself to)

Vince involuntarily twitches out of random, his nerves are a little messed up and it's most likely the thing to happen 1 Like to believe rodys tie slipped off his neck during the struggle and Vince still had it even fit is a little burnt Complete opposites in healing omfg

Every Valentine's Day vince will mutter under his breath or think "happy birthday rody" and continue on with his day be he's a sad sorry ass He just wanted love man Hm.. How does rody feel that he killed a man over so hard that he needed to get hospitalized and almost died Bookie if anyone foudn that it was you you'd be put behind bars bookie i EVEN IF IT WAS YEARS AGO

Vince doesn't make an effort to style his hair much,he just doesn't care about his physical appearance anymore He knows he's already physically fucked up so he just, does the bare minimum He also sleeps a lot more,just - trying to stop himself from thinking about rody

-Vince keeps his head low when he's out, he doesn't like to be crowded- somehow- it works. And he's just glad he's short enough to walk without being spotted from a mile away. He still puts up a optimistic, really kind demeanor outside the bistro,but he drops it and just, he's kinder- but just- a little uptight He doesn't like getting into relationships still,he still has his heart for rody but is trying to push it back and away He mutters to himself something of the such when he starts thinking about him "he hurt you for a reason."

Vince has a mini heart attack when he sees male gingers - He wishes he could get another hug like he did once before Sooo He hugs himself to sleep He always has something in the background when he's trying to rest, usually a song

Baby I'd give you a hug

[niigata-division]

ARB Birthday Special: Lyall Shiba

~~ January 21st ~~

“To forget the dead would be akin to killing them a second time.”

Login Lines:

“Sorry, I’m a bit busy with a case at the moment if you could just…eh? Is this a gift?” 

“My birthday? Oh shoot, it’s today, isn't it? Thanks for reminding me. Now then, if you excuse me, I need to focus on my case.” 

Voice Lines:

“25 years old…if you had told me a few years ago I’d reach this age, I wouldn’t have believed you…or more accurately I would have been too drugged out of my damn mind to understand what you were saying.”  

“My phone has been blowing up all day from my fans sending me Happy Birthday on PROFILE, so I placed it on silent. Not that I’m ungrateful, but I always assumed that with my retirement I’d fade out of the spotlight, but I assume not.” 

“I had a dream last night…and I saw him just standing there with that goddamn smile on his face and…I just got so angry when I saw him that I wrapped my hands around his pathetic little neck and tried to choke him…I hate him.”

“I lit a few candles on my altar to send a few prayers to Anubis and Thoth. It’s a tradition I do every year on my birthday. Mainly, I pray that the next yearly cycle of my life is a good one, but considering I’m in the DRB this year I’m not holding my breath on that one.” 

“Ah shit….I mean, hey Chief, I haven’t caused any trouble lately, so what brings you here? Oh wow, I didn’t think you’d remember it was my birthday. Awwww, I always knew you liked me, Chief! Maybe I'll even break my record for the longest amount of time without giving you a migraine. Ouch, so cold, Chief.” 

“Uhhhhh….Chief? Is this a get-out-of-jail-free card? Okay, but why? Well, I better make sure to save for when I get into some major trouble then. Anubis knows I seem to always be in your office every other day.”  

“Oh Hey Ayumu-san, I take you here to wish me a Happy Birthday too. Just a bit. I owe my life to you, Ayumu-san. It's because of you that I’m still here to celebrate my birthday. I can’t thank you enough for that. Easier said than done. Ah, you didn’t have to get me anything, Ayumu-san, but thank you.” 

“Oh gosh, out of the palettes, you could have gotten…ah it’s perfect Ayumu-san. Did you know this is one of my favorite bands? No offense, Ayumu-san, but I can’t imagine you listening to this band. You're too cheerful of a person for some of the songs.”

Seiji Lines:

“For once you’re not in trouble, Rookie. I just stopped to wish you a happy birthday. Of course, I did. I know the birthdays of all the officers in the department. Normally, I'd wish you a Happy Birthday and just be done with it, but given that you haven’t gotten on my nerves much recently, have this. Consider it both a gift and a reward. Nope, a migraine is starting. *sighs* Get back to work, Shiba.” 

“Of course it is. Given how often you seem to get in trouble, I would think you’d appreciate it. You can redeem it and get off scot-free from any punishment I would usually give you. Only once, though, so use it wisely, Rookie.”

Ayumu Lines:

“Lyall, can I talk to you for a second? Am I that easy to read, huh? Anyway, I'm glad to see you’ve been doing well, especially considering our…first meeting. I was just doing my job, Lyall, but if you want to thank me, just keep living your life would be more than enough. Now then, I know you're into wearing dark makeup, so I got you this as a gift.” 

“Is something wrong, Lyall? It was one of the first palettes I found when I looked up ‘goth makeup’. Really? Maybe I should listen to them sometimes. Eh? Why not? Hey, it’s not my fault. I like to see the bright side of things.” 

[changeling-of-the-fae]

T-10 Pre-Op And The Weird Things You Do Before Surgery

Caveat for anyone who doesn't want to see these (there are probably a lot more coming): I'm tagging them all as 'recovery blog' if you want to block it!

I've been trying to maintain a certain nonchalance - sure, surgery is going to suck, but I've already done everything that comes after.

I know I can do it again, and at least this time I can plan for it.

When I got home from Montana, brace and crutches in tow, I hadn't even finished unpacking from my move. There were boxes everywhere places, clothes that needed a home, and crutch-friendly pathways were non-existent. I didn't have estim, or ice packs, or a wedge pillow.

This time I have all that and more! Possibly too much more.

I suspect my mother and aunt have been looking at knee replacement surgeries for ideas of what I might need, but we are on very different pages.

I love them dearly, but I will NOT be using a bedside commode. I will be getting my nerve-blocked butt the ten feet it takes to get me to the bathroom. The surgeon has already made i clear that it's better to get up and moving sooner rather than later, anyway.

I do, however, think they're starting to get to me. Because, and not to be too dramatic, it feels a little like I'm dying.

It's not because I'm suffering or in total agony. But there's this odd background checklist of 'things I can do now' and 'things I won't be able to do for a while'. And it feels weirdly like I'm putting my affairs in order. Which, really, I am - recovery from surgery, to the level I'm at now (but hopefully better!) is at least six months.

I went grocery shopping, picked up the requisite stool softener (hardcore painkillers), and finished a few of the tasks I promised my mother I'd do weeks ago.

I called my dad's sister and asked her out for coffee, since we only get together at the family Christmas party and I'm not planning to go (it's three days post-op.)

And I have been cleaning; in suspicious new ways.

My parents' house is a visual representation of the marriage of ADHD (my mother, myself, my younger brother - we care but the doing is herculanean) and autism (my dad and older brother - they don't care and don't know why they should.)

So believe me when I say the three hours I spent washing windows, scrubbing switch plates, and dusting baseboards is seriously out of place.

It's just...the little things, y'know?

My bedroom windows haven't been cleaned since before we moved in 15 years ago.

It wouldn't normally register on my radar as a worthy task (they're windows, dirt happens!) but dammit I want to be blinded by sunlight after my surgery.

I want to wake up to snow and wish I had my sunglasses.

(much clean, very shiny!)

I know no one else at home cares. I don't expect them to even notice, really. Hell, I barely care. But there's some weird mental-physical link that's compelled me to make a three (3!!) page to-do list of odds and end tasks like this.

Maybe I'm just looking for ways to stay busy. I'll never admit to it.

[dancingbabya-notes]

Running Away

<-♡—♡—♡—♡—♡—♡—♡—♡—♡—♡—♡—♡ —♡—♡—♡—♡—♡—♡ ->

Keigo x quirkless oc

I just wrote this at the end of december two years ago have fun. I doubt I'm gonna add more to this story. but um I thought I'd mention that it hints at backwards tango, I mean I think most of us know where babies come from by now. I guess theres a lewd joke at the end but um... the ending is more of a joke

<-♡—♡—♡—♡—♡—♡—♡—♡—♡—♡—♡—♡ —♡—♡—♡—♡—♡—♡ ->

Looking at the tests I couldn’t believe it. It was true. Putting every single one in the bag that I’d planned to throw away I swallowed my nerves. This was what I wanted to have a baby. My mother told me it was incredibly hard for women in our family to get pregnant so when it happened hold on and push through. But Keigo didn’t want kids.

“I guess I’ll have to go then.” I mumble picking myself up from the shock.

It wasn’t severe and the symptoms weren’t showing strongly, I could plan this out.

“Hey love bird? Promise you won’t be mad.” Later that night Keigo pouts.

“What’s wrong?”

“I have to go on a few missions out of Tokyo, still in Japan. I won’t be home for a few months.” He explains.

This was perfect. “That’s fine, just take care of yourself. I don't want you to run yourself ragged.”

“I’ll call every chance I get.”

“Once a week is fine, I don’t want you to stress,” I look at him with a small smile.

“I have to leave the day after tomorrow.”

Grabbing his hand I sigh. “Don’t worry, I’ll be fine.”

This was working out too well. But this was going to be interesting. Due to certain things you were a bit of an enigma in the system. You were permanently living in Japan, but it was because of the nature of the visa you had that often made others confused. You could leave at any time.

So after letting Keigo leave and waiting a few days for that first call. You left everything electronic there and took your clothes and other things back home. To America.

Everything was different because of the passing of time but your house was fine. You were more than happy to know everything was kept the same.

“Lynn, you look happier than a groundhog in a hole. I thought you weren’t coming back home.” The man waiting for you smiles.

“Plans changed and I decided to come home,” you chuckle nervously. “All my things will be here in about a month.”

“That’s fine, I’m sure there’s some of your ma’s old stuff at the house.” He ruffles your hair and takes the suitcases from you. “What’s it like across the water?”

“It was fun, I’m amazed by how differently everyone handles their repatriations. But not that it means much—“ you covered your mouth trying to stop the natural reaction. Certain smells triggered the morning sickness, one in particular you didn’t expect was chicken.

Rushing to the nearest bathroom you emptied your stomach and cleaned yourself up. Your uncle stood there with a pointed look. This wasn’t an uncommon situation in your family, a girl gets pregnant and runs away to her family for one reason or another.

“What did he do to you?”

“Uncle Clark, I’m fine. He didn’t do anything but be the best man to me ever,” you didn’t have a quirk so often when you were dating the other party believed themselves to be better than you. “He didn’t want kids.”

The tall man sighs. “Let’s get you home. You need a midwife, I’m not trusting my little sister's baby girl to a hospital.”

It made sense, for some reason when the family visited a hospital to give birth it only resulted in the gradual dilapidation of that person like a withering flower. Your grandmother had survived through sheer spite, and you wished to do the same.

The house you had was close to the family land. Your family wasn’t too big considering a lot of the family considered the difficulty getting pregnant as a curse. Getting everything situated it wasn’t long before your belly grew. There were a few hospital things that were unavoidable. Especially considering the nature of pregnancy for a quirkles person.

“Lynn, you look ready to pop,” your cousin laughs.

“Keep poking fun at me Jon and I’m telling on you,” you hiss. “Apparently I’m having twins.”

“Woah two little feet running about in two years. I wonder what they’ll look like? Momma says I get to help you around the house until it’s time.”

“I know. Tell your Ma I appreciate her.”

“She already knows.” You hear the new voice.

“Hi Aunty.” You wave from your spot.

“Your uncle and Konner will be done with the additions to the house soon. They just wanna be sure there was enough light in the room,” she sighs. “Twins.”

You nod. Excitement had grown in the whole family when they found out that you were pregnant. It was usually a very exciting thing considering your moms side of the family.

“Have you talked to the man since you left?”

“No, I’m sure he won’t notice me gone.”

“I don’t know about that sweet pea. Jon, you wanna tell her?”

You look at your cousin confused.

“At school we sometimes do a review of heroes, we took a look at Japan. I told them you lived there for a while and I knew some information about the other heroes. But it seems that Hawks has been going through a rough patch.”

“What?”

“Yeah, he usually eats chicken a lot. And you know how crazy his metabolism is but he said he gets sick. Then for a few days everyone was concerned because she kept falling asleep.”

You raise a brow. What was going on with him? Despite the estimation you went into early labor.

It took a while but both boys were born safely: Takahiro and Toukou. Your wrinkly raisin babies were in the world. Staying at your aunt’s house until the room was finished you felt exhausted.

The months brought changes though. It was at the first month you noticed red marks on their backs. It wasn’t a bother to them but you did ask the doctor when you went for the check up.

“You said their father has a wing quirk, it could be early quirk development. It is said to be rather painful, so possibly soothing their pain with a warm washcloth could be handy.”

This didn’t help you. But still you took them for their check ups and other things by month four the wing buds were beginning to poke out of the skin. The warm wash cloth was working to help. But it was almost a year that they had a small pair of wings poking from their backs. 

“I’m gonna have a ball with you two aren’t I?” You laugh.

You felt your heart strings pull. With every day they seem to look more and more like their dad with little bits of you mixed in. Takahiro was a little bigger than his twin, his small tuft of hair was the same strawberry red as yours but his eyes were the same gold as his fathers. Toukou had Keigo’s hair but your piercing green eyes. Both of them had the same deep brown skin as you thought.

It felt like if you blinked they were already flying around and talking. Maybe you could go back to Japan to see your little brother, so he could meet the twins. But what if Keigo was still looking for you? 

“Do you want to go back?” Your aunt asks.

“Yes, but I know there isn’t much there for me but my little brother.”

“Go.”

“But—“

“Just go to Japan, there’s no way he can find you that easily.”

With that you packed your things again and the boys things. They were four and you’d already taught them Japanese, both could speak it better than English. Getting everything in order you were surprised by how easily the visa was accepted.

Japan felt like it didn’t change but it was different. Instead of living at the heart of Tokyo like before you chose a different city and more toward the spacious areas. The house you secured was rent to own and you were excited since the neighborhood seemed nice.

“Momma, are we gonna go to school here?” Toukou asks.

Both boys' wings weren’t red, which was good. They had a matching pair of blue gray wings.

“Yes baby, Takahiro, are you upset?” You ask to look at the other child.

“Are we gonna live with dad?”

You pause. “I dunno. I haven’t talked to your father, first you get to meet your uncle. Then I might see if you two can meet your dad.”

He frowns. “I don’t wanna meet him, if he didn’t have the right mind to keep you he’s not worth our time!” 

Toukou frowns. “If he makes momma sad I don’t wanna see him either.”

“Go plan out the backyard while I finish tidying up.” You pat them gently.

Sure they were okay, you started tearing into boxes. It was dark by the time the three of you sat in the living room eating the takeout you ordered.

Getting the message from your brother you smirk as he called. “Hey, I didn’t think you’d come back after disappearing like that.”

“Things happened?” You shrug. “You coming over right? The boys might be asleep by the time you get here.”

“I’m at your door. Open up.”

You hear the knock on your door and through the phone. Your little brother stood there with a smile. Giving  him a firm hug you practically drag him inside. The twins peek around to see who was there.

“Boys come meet your uncle Kai.” You state.

“Damn, I know you said you had kids but I didn’t know you had two little men!” He laughs. “It’s nice to finally meet you two.”

Toukou was the first one to speak. “Uncle, mom said you’re a hero. Is that true?”

“Yup. I work so you two can go to school.”

You punch him. “Don’t say things like that. I have a job.”

You did take a step back as they talked and eventually the boys fell asleep. With your brother’s help you got them to sleep and finished cleaning up after giving him some food.

Kai looks at his cup for a second as you dry your hands. “Are you gonna see him?”

This made you stop as if you were in a movie. “Um, I don’t know Kai.”

“He hasn’t stopped looking for you.” He eyes you as you grab a beer from the fridge.

“Well, it wasn’t like I was hiding. But I don’t wanna see him hurt.” Sipping the beer you sit on the counter.

He stands up. “Lynn, he didn’t hit you did he?”

You were midway putting the can back up to take a sip. Keigo never put his hands on you with the intention of harm. “No, Kai. He wasn’t anything like dad. Just let it go. I left because he didn’t want kids.”

He watches me for a second and sighs. “Did you even tell him you were pregnant?”

“No.”

“Lynn! It’s been years,” he gasps before checking the time. “Shit I gotta go home.Stay safe okay?”

“Course. Keep us safe okay?”

“Always.”

It felt like everything was fine. Until one day when you were sitting on the back porch. It was big enough for you to lay on if you wanted to, but you sat at the edge with your feet dangling off the edge as you sipped the wine.

“Careful there lovebird.”

Your heart clenched as you spat the wine you were about to swallow. Panic filled your senses as you were considering booking it into the house but he was already facing you with his hand holding yours gently like he always did. Tears welled up in your eyes. You were the one who left but it hurt you too. There were other decisions, there were other options but you chose to leave.

“How’s the married life?” He asks with a hollow chuckle.

You roll your eyes. “I’m not married, Keigo.”

“Really? Could have fooled me. Is there anything that you wanna tell me?” He looks at you and you sigh.

“Some time when I’m sober.”

He frowns. “Lovebird.”

You frown as you capped the wine. “Fine. You wanna know? I bet it’s been eating at you for these years, I left because I was pregnant.”

“Who was it?” Your heart stung. He actually thought that you would cheat on him.

“Who else was I sleeping with, Keigo? They are your children.” Just as you consider saying more the door behind you opens.

“Mommy, I had a nightmare,” Takahiro’s whine made you jump up. Pulling him into a hug you let him lean against you.

“It’s okay baby, mommy is here.” You reassure him.

Keigo was bewildered. Indeed the boy in your arms bore a striking resemblance to himself. But he also kept an eye on the boy watching him from the door. His hair.

“Momma, who’s he?”

“Toukou, how about we have some tea? He’s…a guest.” You managed as you picked up the crying boy in your arms.

Your son looked at his father with suspicion and skepticism. What could be on his mind?

“You wanna come in?”

“Yeah.”

Keigo took his boots off and followed you inside. Takahiro maneuvers around you and clings to your back as you make tea. Sleepy milk tea for them, and green tea for yourself.

Keigo was awkward the entire time. Sitting on the ground while Toukou glares him down, the wariness of a child is evident. You weren’t surprised considering how guarded both of your sons always were.

Placing the tray of cups down you let Takahiro climb down as he grabbed his cup and Toukou grabbed his.

“What are your names?” Keigo asks.

Takahiro moves closer to your side. Toukou frowns.

“Be nice please. He’s not a bad person, you can tell him.”

“My name is Takahiro.”

“Toukou.”

You kiss their heads and sigh. “Look at you two, I’m so proud of you.”

“My name is H-“

You cut him off. Waiting for them to pause in their drinking.

“He’s your father.”

“What?!” Both of them look at you in shock.

“I’m actually your dad. Not even sure how that happened.”

You give him a pointed look. “You know exactly how it happened. But that's besides the point. You three have met.”

Everyone returned to their quiet tea sipping and you watched. The tension was thick and you weren’t sure if a knife would be strong enough to cut it. They finished their tea and it was still quiet.

Takahiro stands up with a frown. He grips your hand tightly. “Why didn’t you want us?” He despite being the bigger twin was the quiet one.

Keigo seemed confused at this question. “I didn’t even know you existed. How could I decide if I wanted you or not?”

Takahiro frowns, separating you and Keigo with his body. “I know that. But you told mommy that you didn’t want to have kids. Everyday she sat outside crying because she didn’t know if she did the right thing. Knowing that we wanted to see you she still didn’t because she-“

Toukou stands next to him and uses his wings as a shield. “She didn’t want us to be disappointed in case you didn’t want us. What if you left momma alone and never spoke to her because of us? Momma is the strongest person we know, sure uncle is cool because he’s a hero but momma is stronger than any hero we’ve met.”

“Toukou, Takahiro. You two should get some sleep. It’s late and I’m sure you don’t wanna miss the first day of school.” You remind them.

“Okay.” Takahiro drops his wings. “Don’t hurt our mom.”

Toukou drops his wings and looks at you. “Can we sleep with you?”

“Yes, go get ready for bed again. I’ll be up there in ten minutes. Let me ask your father to leave,” you pat their heads.

They disappear up the stairs. You look to the man that is the father of your children.

“Now that you’ve thoroughly destroyed your image for the boys can you please go back to what you were doing,” you state pointing to the back door.

“Lovebird.”

“Keigo, it’s not the time. I’m tired, and I need to reevaluate how I’ve been handling my emotions,” you run a hand through your hair with a shaky breath.

Keigo looks at you before pulling you into a hug. “No. The last time I listened to you, you left without so much as a word. Lynn you made it seem like you’d stay and I’d talk to you next week. I called your phone everyday hoping that you’d pick up. God I asked your brother to tell me why you left but he refused.”

“Kai is smart.” You huff.

“Are you even listening to me? I’ve waited day after day for five years hoping that I could see you again. Now that you’re here within my grasp, I’m not letting go baby,” he looks into your eyes. The raw emotion filling his eyes was making you crumble, maybe you made the wrong decision. It seemed like the right thing to do. Keigo wasn’t a bad person and you did want to go through everything with him.

“On your next day off you can come to the house.” You manage. “I was the one who messed up, because I was scared. Also I know Takahiro and Toukou can’t stand my inability to keep up with them. Japan is more packed than the house we had before.”

“My next day off, I got it. You’re not disappearing on me again lovebird.”

It was odd. Aside from having to move and getting a much bigger place of residence. The walls were higher and you could let the boys fly freely. Keigo took to helping you with the boys almost immediately. Toukou was the quickest to warm up to him but Takahiro was still a little hesitant to get comfortable.

“Mom, can we get another sibling?”

You dropped the cup in your hand. “What?”

“Please we want a baby sister or brother.”

Keigo looks at you for a moment then to the boys. “We’ll have to think about it.”

Considering you had barely survived your wedding and faking that the registration happened sooner you were a bit stuck. Not that you really ever considered having children after the twins.

“But mom likes taking care of babies.”

“You’re my babies, I like taking care of you.” You remind them. “Go finish your homework.”

Later that night you and Keigo sat awkwardly in your room.

“So they want another sibling.” Keigo sighs.

“It’s fine this should pass. They asked for a new baby before I explained to them that I couldn’t yet.” You look at your husband with a hesitant frown. “Do you want a baby?”

“Well, it’s more what you want. You’re gonna be carrying them for nine months and then some.” He points out.

You wince. “You know, I’m glad the boys grew their wings later. I can’t imagine what it’d have been like if they were born with wings.”

“When did they grow in?”

“It took two years. It started when they were three months old.”

He looks at you. “I’m sorry.”

“For what? I’m the one who ran away.”

“No? I should have been clear with you. I was scared I’d be a horrible father so I didn’t want to have kids but now that I’ve been with the boys for this long I-“

“I know Keigo. I thought I’d be a pretty shit mom, but luckily I had things to keep me going.”

“I’m also upset that I missed the swollen tummy.”

“I don’t miss the cravings. You know I couldn’t eat chicken for months.”

“Hehe, neither could I.”

You look at him and sigh. “I guess let’s have another baby. But just know, you’re in charge of all my weird cravings.”

“I get to-“

“Don’t say it.”

“Lovebird.”

“Only this one time.”

“I’m gonna breed my love bird.”

Mm. Yeah, you regret agreeing. Because if you thought the backwards tango with Keigo was tiring when you weren’t trying to get pregnant it was exhausting.

But it yielded quick results. Going to the doctors you found you were pregnant again. This time with triplets.

Luckily the house was big. Luckily you could do it together.

[kathrynalicemc]

A/N: Here we are! The Valhalla fic at last! I decided I would post this on Dafne's birthday because if I didn't, I'd probably never post it. Im maybe just over half way actually writing it so therefore I am going to be releasing these every second week. That way I still have time to finish writing while still doing uni. This second semester is a bit lighter and shouldn't require as many essays so hopefully I can finish. If not, maybe ill take a mid story break and continue in the summer. I am expecting 10ish chapters but it could be one or two more. Also: IMPORTANT NOTE! Each chapter will have a companion piece in the form of a song. It is heavily recommended you listen to it before/during/after reading as each song inspired the chapter or vice versa. I technically also have posted this prologue before but it was a year ago and ive fixed it up since! Enjoy <3

Warnings: This story is going to be very high fantasy and self indulgent. I know its set around 2020 I think but it wont be very modern LOL. Occasional shitty writing. No legit content warnings for now but expect fight scenes later on.

Characters: Dafne Arcano

Song: Valhalla Calling - Miracle of Sound

---------------------------------------------------------

Prologue: The Call

It began with a crack of lightning, brilliant and blue, lighting up the darkness around her. A second later came the sharp crack of thunder in reply. It rumbled seemingly in every direction, slowly fading into the black void all around her.

Dafne inhaled as she steadied her nerves and clenched her fists.

“Where am I?” The words echoed into nothing, small ripples of water radiated out from her boots and disappeared into the darkness.

Another flash of lightning. Then another. And another. Dafne instinctually brought up her arm to shield her eyes from the light. The ground quaked beneath her feet and reverberated up her legs to her chest. One final crash of lightning lit up the darkness and then everything fell to silence. It stretched on for what seemed like a lifetime and yet just a few heartbeats.

She uncovered her eyes and glanced up, her breath catching in her chest. Before her, growing up from the darkness below, towered an inky black jagged mountainscape backlit by a faint white glow. A swift rapid of rushing water fell from the top and crashed down to the black ground, foaming and sending waves out that turned into gentle ripples by the time they reached Dafnes feet.

A low resonant horn broke the silence from deep within the mountain itself. It almost seemed to call her as if her soul was remembering a memory from long ago.

The waterfall suddenly parted and a stampede of riders shot out, hooves thundering and kicking up a spray of water. Looking closely, Dafne noticed each rider had a shield upon their back. There were three different crests, one of them being the Arcano family crest she was familiar with. A second shield featured the Varangr crest, one she knew of but didn’t encounter often as they lived in solitude on Svalbard. The third was a complete mystery to her. Dafne of course knew about the tale of the three brothers splitting off into their own families but the third family had long since died out, their name and crest lost to time.

These must be the Valkyries her grandfather told stories about. The female members of the three families that had the Gift whose job was to guard and protect the ancient wizard city of Valhalla. Dafnes chest ached as she watched visions of her long since passed ancestors ride off to battle, wishing she could be among the shieldmaidens.

As the last rider vanished into the void, so too did the image of the mountain. All was quiet.

Suddenly, the sky above her erupted into a dancing aurora borealis. Colors of blue and green blazed before her eyes, folding and swirling against the deep indigo sky. The silence was broken by the astonished laughter of Dafne, a sound that very rarely is heard by anyone.

Whirling around to catch every glimpse of it that she could, her eyes caught the shape of a dark figure just a few feet away from her. The figure was tall and imposing, yet her face displayed wisdom and kindness. Her long strawberry blonde hair curled and went past her waist. In that moment, Dafne’s love and obsession for history paid off. She knew based on the tunic and furs that adorned her body that this woman was ancient, probably from the age of Vikings. The woman smiled gently and then three men with similar facial features faded into existence behind her. It was clear that these were her sons.

From the sons, another line of ancestors appeared behind them. Then another. And another. The entire horizon before her stood endless generations of ancestors going back hundreds of years until they disappeared from view into the dark.

One after another they all started to speak. The words were familiar but lost on her at first. Slowly they began to get closer and closer to being recognizable. Eventually she could start to pick out some words she understood from within an avalanche of sound.

“Find us”

“Help us”

“Save us”

“Free us”

The woman in front of her leaned forward, her face inches from Dafne. She placed her hand upon Dafne’s shoulder and then spoke.

“Wake up”

[sealegsagain]

Found something I filled out in 2010. I think I'd like to do it again with my answers now. Now:

100 Truths: After you've filled this out, tag 10 people and have them do the same:

1. Last beverage? Hazelnut coffee, cream and sugar

4. Last song you listened to? Angel Olsen - If it's alive, it will (live at Kim's Video and Music NC April 16, 2011)

5. Last time you cried? January or December, I think

SIX HAVE YOU EVER:

1. Dated someone twice? You mean broke up and then came back? Not that I think about it.

2. Been cheated on? Yeah

3. Kissed someone & regretted it? Not usually

4. Lost someone special? Yeah

5. Been depressed? Who hasn't?

6. Been drunk and threw up? a very long time ago. Before 2016, definintely. The last time that I actually felt ill from it was 2016.

LIST FOUR FAVORITE COLORS:

Purple, black, teal, silver, dark blue

THIS PAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

1. Made new friends? Yep, bangface people mostly

3. Laughed until you cried? Unfortunately not

4. Met someone who changed you? Not that I can tell right now. Ask me in a few more years.

5. Found out who your true friends were? Everyone has their place, so I'm not about to put folks in "true" and "false" categories, but it was nice seeing who stepped in to help during some things I went through, yeah.

6. Found out someone was talking about you? Nah

7. Kissed anyone on your friend's list? Yep

8. How many people on your friends list do you know in real life? Most of them

9. How many kids do you want to have? It's kind of out of my hands at this point with age and PCOS, but I don't see kids in my future

10. Do you have any pets? I'd have cats here if it was allowed.

11. Do you want to change your name? I did. I was known as Elizabeth till I graduated high school. Liz since then. Answer to both. Keeps things interesting.

12. What did you do for your last birthday? Dinner and drinks with Bill at Ikebana, Same with my mom at Bramble and Brine in Lewes. Honestly was wonderful

13. What time did you wake up today? 9:10 am, Work has my body on a schedule where this is what feels like sleeping in is

14. What were you doing at midnight last night? Listening to WTJU, organizing files

15. Name something you CANNOT wait for?

Paying off my car. Leaving the continental USA again.

16. Last time you saw your dad? A few weeks ago

17. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life? I would have been smarter with my money

18. What are you listening to right now? Nothing atm.

19. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom? They're awesome.

23. What's getting on your nerves right now? Sunday Scaries

24. Most visited webpage? Youtube. haha.

This is random how it just starts re-numbering here; but oh well...

1. What's your name? If you don't know by now..

4. Zodiac sign? Sagittarius

5. Male or female or transgendered? Cis female, she/they

6. Elementary? These sound like identity theft questions

7. Middle School? If you don't need to know

8. High school? You already do

10. Hair color? Light brown w/ red and blonde pieces

11. Long or short? Long, wish it were longer

16. Height? 6'

17. Do you have a crush on someone? Nope

18: What do you like about yourself? That'd be an essay that I don't have room for

19. Piercings? Just the ears. I'm boring.

20. Tattoos? None

21. Righty or Lefty? Righty

FIRSTS :

22. I'll choose wisdom teeth removal. They did sew those up.

23. First piercing? Ears.

24. First friends? Don't remember. Elementary School

26. First sport you joined? Tennis. I wasn't great at it

27. First pet? Jasmine the cat

28. First vacation? Disney World, Orlando

29. First concert? BB King with my mom

30. First crush? Memory Hazy.

RIGHT NOW:

49. Eating? Had A bagel and leftover bulgogi for breakfast

50. Drinking? Lacroix fizzy water

52. I'm about to? Bathe, antique store, groceries

53. Listening to? nothing atm

55. Waiting for? Tonight. Oh oh oh... when you will be here in my arms (but nothing really) --------------------------------------------

stopped here, will finish later

YOUR FUTURE :

58. Want kids? Nah

59. Want to get married? If things align that way

WHICH IS BETTER WITH THE OPPOSITE SEX?

68. Lips or eyes? eyes

69. Hugs or kisses? kisses

70. Shorter or taller? close to my height is nice

71. Older or Younger? either

72. Romantic or spontaneous? I think they're the same thing.

73. Nice stomach or nice arms? arms?? muscles don't matter to me.

74. Sensitive or loud?

75. Hook-up or relationship?

HAVE YOU EVER :

78. Kissed a stranger? within talking to them the first time the same day.

80. Lost glasses/contacts? in all senses of the word, including contacts actually ejecting themselves from my eyes!

81. Cried during a movie? Amelie, without fail. several others.

82. Broken someone's heart? been told I have... ask me this when I was Gina's age and I'd say it was impossible for me to.

83. Had your own heart broken? That's like asking me if I'm alive

85. Been arrested? can't say I have been, or want to be.

86. Turned someone down? Yeah. One actually took it well! I don't want to believe in ladder theory.

87. Cried when someone died? of course.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:.

89. Yourself? I want to.

90. Miracles? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hBBzrHXu1Fg&feature=related

:D

91. Love at first sight? Never happened to me. Maybe for others. Love requires interaction, not just seeing.

92. Heaven? no. I think I know why people believe in it though (as a concept, not judeo-christian)

93. Santa Claus? I miss people actually SLEEPING on Christmas eve. I believe in the Santa ritual even if gifts are not exchanged in the morning. No gaming all night for one night a year :p

95. Kiss on the first date? depends. *thinks back to how many times it was a mandatory-or-never thing* Let's debate, kids.

96. Angels? They have cool names Ariel, Gardriel, Sharmiel. but no.

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY:

97. Is there one person you want to be with right now?

Definitely. Daily. Wish he knew it. Made a very bad move lately. Feel sick.

98. Had more than one boyfriend/girlfriend at one time? Nevah. I almost combusted from guilt when I went on casual dates with two different guys in the same week once.

2010:

100 Truths: After you've filled this out, tag 10 people and have them do the same.

1. Last beverage? diet coke

4. Last song you listened to? Ayu Trance 3 in the car on the way to the vigil.

if you're listening to music, you're steps ahead of me.

5. Last time you cried? if you can't remember, that's good. me- New years eve.

SIX HAVE YOU EVER:

1. Dated someone twice? what length of time is that

2. Been cheated on? Guy said he broke up with his ex, then slept with her again. found out about it online. :p

3. Kissed someone & regretted it? Only one person is a regret to the point I regret my memories. Their name started with an L

4. Lost someone special? It would have been awesome if they stayed in my life.. I think. not sure. Hurt to lose them though.

5. Been depressed? clinical symptoms, not clinical length

6. Been drunk and threw up? ..... regrettably yes. I don't want to get that drunk ever again. If you do, you'll want to throw up all day the next day. :(

LIST FOUR FAVORITE COLORS:

1. deep blue

2. violet

3. silver

4. marine

THIS PAST YEAR HAVE YOU:

1. Made new friends? o' course

3. Laughed until you cried? Maybe once or twice did my stomach hurt from laughing. No water tho.

4. Met someone who changed you? Change can't be pinned on one person.

5. Found out who your true friends were? There was no weeding out event.

6. Found out someone was talking about you? I wish they were :p~~ I think at this point, I'd see it as amusement.

7. Kissed anyone on your friend's list? If I were kissing someone, it's likely I'd have the courtesy to add them

8. How many people on your friends list do you know in real life? All but a few, and those I've known long enough for it to count.

9. How many kids do you want to have? None of my own, now, thanks. Future: one perhaps?

10. Do you have any pets? LOUD kit-kat

11. Do you want to change your name? I did. I was known as Elizabeth till I graduated high school.

12. What did you do for your last birthday? Went to an art show. My. Just thinking about it cheers me up.

13. What time did you wake up today? 7 yesterday.. I had finally reset myself to diurnal and I messed up last night.

14. What were you doing at midnight last night? waking up from a nap, I think

15. Name something you CANNOT wait for? oooh I love looking forward to things :)

Makes life worth living. Philly next weekend. But seriously, my next pell grant check, then I can do things I need to do.

16. Last time you saw your dad? last Sunday

17. What is one thing you wish you could change about your life? the qualit

18. What are you listening to right now? a cover of poker face done by chris daughtry... needless to say, scarred for life.

19. Have you ever talked to a person named Tom? cannot say I have.

23. What's getting on your nerves right now? Aw Gina, Lady Gaga shouldn't get on your nerves ;) But right now? Worries, arguments.

24. Most visited webpage? It's all moving towards 2.0 and I can see it. This one! ha.

This is random how it just starts re-numbering here; but oh well... (indeed it is)

1. What's your name? gina grace magnesia cilantro zwicky. ( I like your name.! Mine's Elizabeth Anne Peek. very borin)

4. Zodiac sign? Sag with a vag

5. Male or female or transgendered? I used the answer to #4 to make that clear

6. Elementary? glen ave k-3/north salisbury magnet 4-6

7. Middle School? wicomico middle

8. High school? WIHI

10. Hair color? NOT GINGER (Gina, Gingers are awesome)

11. Long or short? mediano.

16. Height? 5'11 Eh meh. Giant lady. used to it by now. Tall ladies of the world: you can still attract men. Have for ages

17. Do you have a crush on someone? Without emotions. without feelings. life is just a clock.. ticking (but seriously, not at the moment)

18: What do you like about yourself? I look at other people and think I'm not so awful.

19. Piercings? Two standard

20. Tattoos? Blanque

21. Righty or Lefty?

FIRSTS :

22. First surgery? not going to talk about that here

23. First piercing? ears- 7. they made one of the holes too low. :p

24. First friends? What the hell kind of question is this??

26. First sport you joined? tennis? Lots of rollerblading..

27. First pet? Praying mantis in a jar

28. First vacation? fraaaance!

29. First concert? BB King with my mom

30. First crush? Christopher Henry in 1st grade. The fact that I remember his name is frightening

RIGHT NOW:

49. Eating? pickle chips (lol what else is new)

50. Drinking? nada.

52. I'm about to? Stay awake all day, go to craft store, finish organizing music @_@

53. Listening to? not my brother's hardstyle anymore, WHY WONT HE LISTEN TO ANYTHING ELSE?

55. Waiting for? the next step

YOUR FUTURE :

58. Want kids? uh, most likely NOT.

59. Want to get married? YES

60. Careers in mind? nature tv show host! (i'm thinking, like, the female version of bear grylls) XD

WHICH IS BETTER WITH THE OPPOSITE SEX?

68. Lips or eyes? eyes

69. Hugs or kisses? kisses

70. Shorter or taller? either

71. Older or Younger?

72. Romantic or spontaneous? I think they're the same thing.

73. Nice stomach or nice arms? arms?? muscles don't matter to me.

74. Sensitive or loud? WHO SAID SENSITIVE WAS THE OPPOSITE OF LOUD

75. Hook-up or relationship? I think I'm done with hook-ups

HAVE YOU EVER :

78. Kissed a stranger? within talking to them the first time the same day.

80. Lost glasses/contacts? in all senses of the word, including contacts actually ejecting themselves from my eyes!

81. Cried during a movie? Amelie, without fail. several others.

82. Broken someone's heart? been told I have... ask me this when I was Gina's age and I'd say it was impossible for me to.

83. Had your own heart broken? That's like asking me if I'm alive

85. Been arrested? can't say I have been, or want to be.

86. Turned someone down? Yeah. One actually took it well! I don't want to believe in ladder theory.

87. Cried when someone died? of course.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:.

89. Yourself? I want to.

90. Miracles? http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hBBzrHXu1Fg&feature=related

:D

91. Love at first sight? Never happened to me. Maybe for others. Love requires interaction, not just seeing.

92. Heaven? no. I think I know why people believe in it though (as a concept, not judeo-christian)

93. Santa Claus? I miss people actually SLEEPING on Christmas eve. I believe in the Santa ritual even if gifts are not exchanged in the morning. No gaming all night for one night a year :p

95. Kiss on the first date? depends. *thinks back to how many times it was a mandatory-or-never thing* Let's debate, kids.

96. Angels? They have cool names Ariel, Gardriel, Sharmiel. but no.

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY:

97. Is there one person you want to be with right now?

Definitely. Daily. Wish he knew it. Made a very bad move lately. Feel sick.

98. Had more than one boyfriend/girlfriend at one time? Nevah. I almost combusted from guilt when I went on casual dates with two different guys in the same week once.

[alsjeblieft-zeg]

344 of 2023

WHAT WAS YOUR LAST:

Beverage = Coca Cola.

Phone call = my husband, from work.

Text message = something from my bank.

Song you listened to = My Way by Limp Bizkit.

Time you cried = in April, when I heard bad news from work.

HAVE YOU EVER:

Dated someone twice = I don't really understand this question, dating is utterly baffling to me.

Been cheated on = yes, by my first ex. He was even open about it.

Kissed someone & regretted it = no, not really. I rarely kiss people anyway.

Lost someone special = yes, my grandma. She passed away from lung cancer.

Been depressed = yes, I had one serious episode when I stopped getting up from bed.

Been drunk and threw up = no, I don't throw up.

LIST THREE FAVOURITE COLOURS:

black

neon green

purple

THIS YEAR HAVE YOU:

Made a new friend = not really. I maintained all old friendships, though.

Fallen out of love = no. My love is very stable.

Laughed until you cried = many times. Last time from the thread on this forum, about replacing one word in a song title with "fart" 😂

Met someone who changed you = no. It happened many years ago.

Found out who your true friends were = no, I found it out earlier.

Found out someone was talking about you = yeah, quite a few times.

Kissed anyone on your fb friend’s list = I don't have Facebook.

GENERAL:

How many people on your fb friends list do you know in real life = I don't have FB, but if I did, I wouldn't add random strangers.

Are you happy = in general, yes. With some details of my life, no.

Do you have any pets = yes, two cats.

Do you want to change your name = no, I like my name, even though it's boring and common in my area.

What did you do for your last birthday = existing and getting older :P

What time did you wake up today = before 7am.

What were you doing at midnight last night = sleeping.

Name something you CANNOT wait for = another vacation, or another road trip.

Last time you saw your Mother = in July, we live pretty far from my parents.

What is one thing you wish you could change about your life = I'd have a perfect health.

What are you listening to right now = nothing, just watching a domcumentary about buying houses in TV.

Have you ever talked to a person named Tom = Yeah, but probably not in person.

What’s getting on your nerves right now = nothing in particular.

Most visited webpage = priyom.org, sigidwiki.com, kiwisdr.com, Tumblr and two forums.

Nicknames = Jelle or Jelle-tje.

Relationship Status = married.

Zodiac sign = Taurus.

Gender? = male.

Elementary? = yes.

Middle School = yes.

High School = yes.

Hair colour = natural brown, currently red.

Long or short = short.

Height = 180cm / 5'11

Do you have a crush on someone? = kind of, but I don't think it's romantic. 48: What do you like about yourself? = I'm not judgemental. 49 Piercings = eight in total: three in left ear, two in right ear (one removed, though), snakebites and left eyebrow.

Tattoos = two, one on each forearm.

Righty or lefty = kinda ambidextrous, used to be left-handed, but then I got a nerve damage so my right hand took over some functions.

FIRSTS :

First crush = one male rapper lol. He's Dutch.

First piercing = left ear.

First best friend = a girl named Martina.

First sport you joined = basketball, I used to be a semi-professional player.

First vacation = can't remember.

First car = never had a car on my own, but Renault Clio IV.

RIGHT NOW:

Eating = nothing.

Drinking = nothing.

I’m about to = chill because I have too much time today.

Listening to = some TV program.

Waiting for = having the possibility to see this man.

YOUR FUTURE :

Want kids? = no.

Get Married? = I'm already married.

Career? = the same as I have now, heavy rolling stock electrician. I love my job.

WHICH IS BETTER :

Lips or eyes = eyes.

Hugs or kisses = hugs, if ever.

Shorter or taller = doesn't matter.

Older or Younger = doesn't matter.

Romantic or spontaneous = spontaneous.

Nice stomach or nice arms = who cares.

Sensitive or loud = a bit of both maybe?

Hook-up or relationship = relationship, I'm not a hook-up person.

Trouble maker or hesitant = a bit of both, too.

HAVE YOU EVER :

Kissed a stranger = no.

Drank hard liquor = yes.

Lost glasses/contacts = yes.

Sex on first date = no.

Broken someone’s heart = yes.

Had your own heart broken = yes.

Been arrested = no.

Turned someone down = yes.

Cried when someone died = yes.

Fallen for a friend? = yes.

DO YOU BELIEVE IN:

Yourself = not much.

Miracles = yes.

Love at first sight = nope.

Heaven = I'm doubtful.

Santa Claus = lol yes and no :P

Kiss on the first date = I believe in kissing when you're ready for it.

Angels = yeah, in form of some humans. And cats <3

ANSWER TRUTHFULLY

Had more than one bf/gf?= yes, I had three relationships.

Did you sing today? = no, unless singing in my head counts :P

Ever cheated on somebody? = no. I can't even imagine doing it.

If you could go back in time, how far would you go, and why? = before 2021 so maybe I could prevent my brain damage.

If you could pick a day from last year and relive it, what would it be? = 24th July I think, going for our vacation :D

Are you afraid of falling in love with somebody else? = no. My love is not really romantic anyway, or at least I think so.

Posting this as 100 truths? = pff.

[extravaguk]

pairing: jungkook x reader

summary: But above all things, the last thing you expected to happen when you came back was to show your tits and get pierced by none other than motherfucking Jeon Jungkook.

Jeon Jungkook. Guk. Gukkie. Jeongukkie.

wordcount: 15k

genre: summer!au, ex high school classmaters, kinda frenemies to lovers, tattoo artist!&piercing artist!jungkook, popular!reader

rated: m (fluff - smut - angst)

warnings: you broke jungkook's heart you bitch!! , oral sex (m&f), protected sex (shocking tbh), CL as your bestie it doesnt get better than that! idk i dont wanna spoil too much

author's note: fucking finally dude!! i've been writing this since february but school was kicking my ass. now that i finished my exams and mercury is in gemini i was able to finish it. if you read this, i hope you enjoy it!

Inkphoria

You've been standing outside the shop re-reading the word for fifteen minutes, although it definitely feels like it has been longer. You're gripping the flyer too tightly, rumpling the paper in your hand until you're pretty much sure it's ruined. It's the first day of June, and it's already too hot. The sun and humid weather are causing beads of sweat to form in your hairline and your white tank top to stick to your skin. Your jean shorts didn't feel this uncomfortable a few hours ago and you're sure the heat is causing your mascara to transfer to your eyelids and lower lashline. You've never needed a slushie and a smoke this bad in forever, even if you knew the later would make your parents lose their shit.

Inkphoria

You read it again. Your brain is trying to guess what font its written in, an excuse to try to steady your heart beat until your nerves ease a little and you can finally gather the courage to step into the damn shop. You've noticed a few people passing by giving you strange looks because maybe it hasn't been fifteen minutes. Perhaps you've been unmoving like an idiot in the middle of the street for longer than you want to admit.

Chaelin's voice echoes inside your head.

'Its not that much of a big deal. It's not even that painful, trust me.'

You wish you could trust your best friend, but your best friend is also the same woman who assured you Cats was the movie of the year. Yes, not 'Cats: The Musical'. 'Cats', the movie.

'And this could be a great start to get out of your comfort zone and start living your life exactly the way you want to, not the way people expect you to. Not the way your family wants you to, not the way Adam wanted you to.'

But although her credibility could sometimes be questionable - like that time she also told you she'd tried marmite and 'honestly, it's not as bad as people make it out to be'-, you also didn't trust anybody in this world as much as you trusted her. She had always been your entire support system, the only one around you who never sugarcoated, who always treated you as an equal, who was always there for you to help you discover yourself and, at the same time, remind you of who you were.

'And it's gonna look so hot, too.'

That's it. Sticking the wrinkled flyer on your back pocket, your feet finally start moving. It doesn't take longer than three strides and you're pushing open the door.

The first thing you notice is that, thankfully, the shop is empty. The second thing you notice is the bright sky blue walls, a green undertone peaking through. Your eyes scan nervously the interior. Frames with tattoo designs and people modeling other different designs decorate the walls, some skateboards also hanging from the ceiling. A few plants in the corner, and two leather couches on either side of the room. Your scanning stops on the counter, where a girl with short, platinium hair and -what you guess is- the eighty percent of her body inked. Face included. She's been looking at you, a smirk tugging at her lips. Her tone is amused when she speaks

"Hi." she says. "You can come closer, you know? We don't bite."

Great. As if you couldn't feel more out of place, apparently you also couldn't look more out of place.

"Sorry." you gulp as you walk forward. "It's my first time doing anything like this."

She laughs this time, but it's not mean. It's not mocking, thank God, and the smile she sends you is as warm as the weather, friendly, luckily helping you calm down a bit. "A virgin, huh? JK's gonna love this." your eyes jump in surprise, but she's fast to wave her hands in front of you. "Just a joke. So, first time getting a tattoo. You have something in mind, honey?"

"Um, no. Not a tattoo. Not yet, I think." you wet your lips, regretting not reaplying chapstick before stepping inside. "A piercing."

"Oh! Cool!" she claps her hands, too excited for your own taste, pulling from under the counter a catalogue. "So, where will it be? Cartilogue? Nose? A lot of people are getting their septums pierced right now, though, so you might-"

"Nipples. Like, one of them."

Her gaze finds yours in surprise, although her face swiftly transforms again into an amiable expression. "Now, that's badass. Alright!" she skims through the pages of the catalogue until she finds the nipple piercing collection. You scratch your head before wiping your forehead sweat-free. "You can pick either barbells or hoops, although barbells heal faster and they don't move around as much. There's different kinds of metal, too. Gold or platinium. If your skin is sensitive, I recommend titanium. It's hypoallergenic and not as problematic."

The blonde keeps talking as you nod your head, a smile making its way into your face while silently thanking her for her easygoing personality. It quickly makes you feel comfortable and stupid for being so terrified of doing this.

Once you decide, settle on the cost and sign the papers, she stands up from the stool she'd been sitting on. "Ok, I'll go tell my coworker. He's been sketching tattoos all morning, it's time he gets to work!" she laughs, but suddenly your smile banishes and your throat shuts down.

"He?" your alarmed tone halts her motions and she looks back at your frightened expression.

He? A he is going to pierce your nipple? You're about to let a random stranger, a HE, see and touch one of your boobs and then pierce a needle through one of your nipples?

"Oh, baby, don't worry. I'd do it myself if I knew how to, but I only do tattoos. Most of our staff are on summer vacation so it's mostly just him and I. If you don't feel comfortable, which is totally understandable, you can wait until september when Minzy comes back and she can do it for you." It's her turn to scratch the back of her head as she adds: "but trust me, we're professionals. He's not a creep or anything like that. He's been doing this for a long time. He won't cross any boundaries."

September? You won't even be here in september. Fuck.

Sure, you could do it when you move back into the city. But this summer was supossed to be the summer. You already decided after your breakup with Adam that there would be no trace of the old you. That it was time to push yourself, to do the things that you've always wanted to do, unapologetically. To find the new you, the real you. To stop being scared.

So after going through you options for a few seconds and taking a deep breath, you make up your mind.

"It's fine. I can do it."

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"JK, sweetheart!"

Jungkook is finishing drawing a Chinese dragon when Mijoo opens the door without knocking. Again. He puts the pen down, rubbing his eyes. It's monday, a slow monday, not much work, and he had hoped it would stay that way until closing time. It's summer and Jungkook hates summer. He hates the heat, he hates being drenched in sweat, and he hates the fact that he can do nothing about it. Because working in the summer is terrible. Summer makes him lazy, makes him want to bathe in a tub full of iced water and not get out until he turns into a raisin and october comes. It makes him irritable. Summer makes him annoyed by people -like Mijoo, even if he loves her to death- and himself.

"I got a girl here who wants a nipple piercing, her first piercing by the way, so get your shit ready and bla bla bla. Straight titanium barbell. Also, don't flirt and don't be creepy. She almost ran away when I told her a male was going to be touching and piercing her tit, be mindful of that. She's too cute, if you want to get her number you should wait until it's done. I think that's it. I'll bring her in in a minute."

Mijoo leaves as fast as she talks, but Jungkook is already used to it. He's already used to the headaches her mouth causes too. He sighs before standing up, tying his too-long raven hair into the best bun he can manage. He washes his hands, sets the table up, sits on the chair and puts the gloves on. He's too busy sterilizing the jewerly when Mijoo comes back with you.

"Alright, my babies. I'll leave you to it." she turns to you. "He'll explain everything, from how the process will be to how to take care of it after it's done." she leaves before saying bye, closing the door behind her, and then he finally turns to you.

Your eyes meet and suddenly everything stops. He almost drops the sterilizing machine, his whole body tensing, going into panic mode as he recognizes you immediatly. His hands shake.

Of course he does. Of course he recognizes his high school crush. The too goody two shoes, too pretentious and too rich, too good for everybody and, most importantly, 'too good for Jeon Jungkook' girl of his high school dreams. Of course he recognizes the girl he had confessed his stupid crush to when he was sixteen. Of course he recognizes the girl who rejected and broke his young and foolish heart when he was a dumb teenager.

It doesn't matter that six years have passed ever since. He still knows every lock of your hair like the palm of his hand. He still remembers the shape of your lips and the exact shade of your eyes. He can still identify the body he fantasized about -and jacked off to- when he was a hormonal teen, now filled in all the right places. Now a grown woman.

Just one look at you after years and years of pining is enough to almost make him faint. And grow a boner under his jeans.

And by the look on your face, your eyes wide and your mouth agape, you recognize him as well.

Dammit.

He schools his features and clears his throat. Forces his body to relax and compose himself, because he's not a teenager anymore. He's also a grown man, who has matured, who now has much more experience with women than he did back then. He had already embarrased himself enough when he was sixteen to be doing it all over again. You're just another attractive girl in a sea of attractive women.

He turns to you. You still haven't said anything. Neither has he.

"Um, you can sit on the table." he manages, motioning to the set up in front of him. He watches you taking doubtful steps until you're sitting down, your eyes avoiding his gaze. He almost forgot you were here to get pierced. Holy shit, you were here to get pierced. To get your nipple pierced.

You're a professional, Jungkook. You can do this, Jungkook. You've seen boobs before, Jungkook. You've pierced nipples before, Jungkook.

Clearing his throat again and forcing his hands to stay by his side, he speaks. "The... The top." your gaze finds his, like a puppy about to get scolded. You look at your top, realization dawning on you. "You don't have to take it off. You can just pull it down."

So you do, pulling the straps of the white tank top down and dragging the fabric down with trembling fingers. No bra. Jungkook gulps as your breasts comes into vision. As perfect as he had imagined years ago. His cock twitches. Round, full, perky and so damn inviting he has to hold himself back from latching onto one nipple with his mouth around it and swirling his tongue over the nub until you're a pretty, moaning, little mess on his piercing tabl-

He closes his eyes for just a second before reminding himself to act like the 23 year old Jungkook he's tried so hard to become. The confident, assured Jungkook he is.

"Okay, this is how it'll go. First I'll clean it and scrub it to get rid of any bacteria." he's so glad he hasn't stuttered yet. 23 year old Jungkook doesn't stutter like 17 year old Jungkook. He's also glad he can pick the alcohol bottle and the surgical scrub without trembling. When he faces you again, you're watching his motions with your lip caught between your teeth. That has him swallowing the lump in his throat.

Making eye contact with him again, you take a deep breath and offer a small nod, so he gets to work. He can show you and himself he's a grown man. A grown man who can pierce a nipple without appearing like it's the first time he's seen a boob in his life. The sooner he does it, the sooner it's over.

Jungkook wets the paper towel with alcohol before carefully wiping over your nub with it. Your back arches, probably from the cold feeling, he guesses. He rubs it a few times before throwing it in the trash can nearby. He avoids looking at how enticing the soft peak is salluting him when he reaches for the marker. He doesn't say anything when he dots it with it, jaw clenched and his dick painfully stiff.

"Lay back." his voice low as he commands, turning away to get the clamp. When he slides closer, he tries to ignore the view: you, with your hair sprawled and your sweaty, shiny skin and your eyes focused on the cieling, nipple fully erect, like the star of one of his most erotic dreams. He extends his free gloved hand before he can stop himself, fingers carefully working the nub until he's sure it's painfully hard. Almost as hard as he is.

You gasp, your back arching again. He stills and looks at you, your cheeks flushed pink. Probably from the heat, he guesses again. Or at least that's what he tells himself. He can't stop himself from wondering how responsive would you be in a different setting, most likely his bed while his teeth play with your breast and his cock dives into-

"You okay?" he studies your face, your eyes not meeting his and instead still focusing on the white ceiling.

"Mhm." you reply with a small voice.

"Relax, alright? It'll be over soon." his voice is as gentle as he can, his fingers mindlessly caressing your breast to try to soothe your nerves. Or maybe it's just because he's a selfish bastard. Whatever it is, he forces himself to bring the clamp to your nipple, securing it around it.

"Take a few deep breaths. This will only take a second of pain and then it will go away." He misses the way your mouth falls open, but he doesn't miss the way your eyes squeeze tight as the needle goes in.

"Ah!" he definitely doesn't miss that either. He goes rigid for a second, because that didn't fucking sound like a cry of painfulness. It's breathy, and whiny, not too loud and, for fucks sake, if that's how you sound when you're getting fucked, he swears to God-

He feels your heartbeat under his hands when he puts the barbell in and then the bandage over it. He takes a look at you, chest moving up and down. And then you take a look at him and what he sees is almost enough to take you right there.

Reddened cheeks, drops of sweat framing your face and those eyes glazed with something he's seen too much in the women he's fucked throughout his life. They're half lidded, mascara adorning your long lashes and almost smudged, looking right through him.

"Jungkook..." and your voice, as you say his name -acknowledging him for the first time since you stepped into his shop, for the first time since you were sixteen-, it's hoarse, almost inaudible, like you just came all over his-

He's on his feet in an instant like he's been burned. "It may bleed for the first week, and it can be really sore. The swelling will eventually come down." he's quickly tidying up the table, a bottle in his hand that he hands to you without looking directly. "Wash it gently with this soap and warm water once per day. Don't touch it. Wear a comfortable...bra. If it gets crusty, clean it with saline. Not alcohol or any other thing you might clean a wound with. The soap I just gave you or saline. Nothing else."

He's pacing around the room as he takes his gloves off and throws them in the trash bin, too agressively maybe, then he keeps rambling, like he's hurriedly trying to make you leave as soon as possible. "Avoid pools and the sea. It takes about six months to a year to heal, so don't... don't touch it, don't play with it or..." he clears his throat, "don't let anyone else play with it. And if it gets infected, come back immediately and I'll take a look at it." which he honestly hopes it won't happen. When he faces you, your top is back on and you're getting off the table.

"Alright, um...I'll do that." clearing your throat, your hand gripping the doorknob. "Thank you."

But right before you can exit the room, Jungkook says your name.

"_____." when you turn around to face him, it takes a few seconds for him to make eye contact from across the room. "It was good to see you."

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"Let me see!"

It's the first thing Chaelin says when she opens the door to her appartment. It's on the second floor, small enough to compare it to most expensive appartments you'd stayed in throughout your life, but big enough for Chaelin, her cat and her -impressive- collection of acrylic nail kits and pairs of high heels. It's also big enough for her to offer you the only guest room until summer is over so you didn't have to, one, stay at your parents' place, and two, find an appartment in a short period of time for a short period of time.

When you left years ago, you did so with the thought of 'never looking back'. You never really expected to return here, of all places. Maybe visit your best friend for a weekend at most, have dinner with your parents on a saturday and then go back to the new life you'd made for yourself on a sunday.

But that was before you'd caught Adam cheating.

Tale as old as time: childhood sweethearts get engaged, move in together, son of a bitch sleeps with the assistand he told his girlfriend not to worry about, and then the brokenhearted girl packs her bags and leaves the cheating bastard begging for her to come back.

You'd be lying if you said you were surprised.

Throughout your life, you'd learned to expect many things, regardless of being sheltered and babied by your family since you were born. Watched too much Maury and Dr.Phil. Too much Gossip Girl to know what the deal with life really is.

So, thankfully, you'd only shed a few tears, mostly because your ego and self steem were slightly triggered. You'd realize long before that your feelings for Adam started to disappear once he popped the question and you said yes. Your love story began as teenagers but soon after graduating, the two of you went on different paths: you'd matured, grown into your twenties while he got stuck at 17 and never stopped acting as such.

So yeah, whatever, break ups are hard. But they're not as hard when the love is gone and the sole reason to stay with your partner is to please your parents. You were also right when you expected your mom to tell you to 'forgive and forget' because 'those things just happen, it's not a big deal, honey'.

But above all things, the last thing you expected to happen when you came back was to show your tits and get pierced by none other than motherfucking Jeon Jungkook.

Jeon Jungkook. Guk. Gukkie. Jeongukkie.

The lanky nerd with braces, glasses and an anime obsession much bigger than his hentai obsession, which is saying a lot. The shy, awkward classmate who'd stuttered his undying crush for you when you were just kids. That one who you had rudely rejected like the bitch you used to be in high school.

But my God, Jeon Jungkook was anything but a kid now.

You were shocked. You were gagged. Couldn't seem to fathom what was happening and what your eyes were seeing. It took you a while to close your mouth when you realized JK was Guk. Gukkie. Jeongukkie.

With messy black hair, a smoldering gaze free of glasses, piercings adorning both ears, and his right eyebrow,, the braces long gone showing perfectly straight - but still bunny like- teeth. The clothes he wore were loose, all black, but it was impossible not to notice the muscles of his back and arms, covered with tattoos from his hands to his forearms. You'd bet there were more of them underneath the fabric.

It was awkward at first. You didn't know what to do, or what to say. Didn't know if he rememberd you. So you chose to stay quiet while your body chose to react like it had never been in the presence of an attractive young man in it's entire life.

And oh, did it react.

He was reluctant, his old timid demeanor peeking through his newly adopted persona. But as soon as those hands came in contact with your skin, your whole body was lit on fire. Like you were 16 and losing your virginity over again and it was the first time a dude touched your boobs.

There shouldn't have been anything erotic about it -besides the fact that your entire breasts were exposed-, it should've been just a professional procedure. But those gloved fingers touched and pinched and suddenly you were too aware of Jeon Jungkook and the way you were starting to sweat profously, not due to the heat of the season.

You tried to distract yourself by looking at the cieling and not at his gorgeous face. Tried to avoid thinking about Jeon Jungkook and how his mouth would feel wrapped around you. Tried not to think about the way your panties were a second skin to your folds, and how tempted you were to grind your hips until you recieved some sort of friction with the jean fabric of your shorts. You wonder if he noticed you squeezing your thighs together. You hope not.

And then the needle happened. You never thought of yourself as a particularly kinky person. Sex with Adam was boring for the most part and you'd lost your libido for a long time. Stopped thinking about sex altogether. But the pain. The pain mixed with his hand rubbing soothing circles on your breast and his voice, as sweet as honey, guiding you through it. It made you reconsider a lot of things you'd once dismissed as 'weird' or 'deviant'

You swear you almost came right on his table.

And then your eyes connected, you made the mistake of calling his name like a satisfied woman who still needed more, and it was all gone. He stood up like a scared cat, gave you a bunch of explanations about the aftercare that you barely grasped without even looking at you and pretty much rushed you to leave.

So you walked, all the way from the tattoo parlor to Chaelin's appartment, mortified, and completely humilliated.

"Are you gonna let me see or not?" your friend says expectantly as you finally sit down after chugging a glass of iced water. You sigh, placing the glass on the table before carefully pulling down your top. "Oh my God, it looks so cool!" she gasps and you can't help a smile while she studies it in amazement. "Did it hurt?"

"Um, I guess." you keep out the part where you almost orgasmed, obviously, stopping her hand from touching when she reaches towards you. "Wait, no. He said something about not touching it for like six months or a year, I don't remember."

At that, Chaelin's eyebrows quirk up. "He? It was a he? Was he cute, at least?"

"You won't believe this..." looking away for a few seconds, you take a deep breath. "It was Jeon Jungkook."

There's a pause, a silence that fills the room when Chaelin's jaw drops. "Jeon Jungkook...pierced your nipple?"

You close your eyes, bracing yourself for what you're a hundred percent sure is coming.

"Ha..." there it is. "Ha ha..." you still know there's more. "Ha ha ha..."

Chaelin laughs hysterically for about God knows how long, while you keep drinking your glass of water unfaced, your mind drifting back to Guk. Gukkie. Jeongukkie, his tattoos and his stupid gloved hands.

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You know he's here.

Everything was cool, you were doing alright, having a great time with your vodka sprite in hand and your cute white bikini on. Chaelin was by your side, the guys were excited to have you back and thankfully, you'd avoided most questions about Adam and they'd avoided digging too deep into the topic. You'd sunbathed the whole afternoon, kept away from the water like he'd told you and ate the Hawaiian pizza Yoongi insisted on ordering despite Namjoon's and Jimin's complaints.

It's at night, when you're a little tipsy and your cheeks are flushed, that you feel it. You'd barely noticed Taehyung disappearing to let in a new guest.

You don't see him, but you feel him.

You're sitting on the pool tile steps, legs dangling and the water baely reaching your belly to make sure it doesn't touch your very sensitive and newly pierced nipple. Your back is facing the sliding glass doors of Hoseok's house, but the moment you hear his voice, smooth but animated as he converses with Taehyung, your body wakes up immediately, back straightening, goosebumps forming on your arms and nipples tightening against the fabric of your two piece.

You don't turn around, instead opting for downing the remaining of your drink and coming to the realization that, of course, Taehyung, social butterfly who'd always got along with everybody and remained friends with most people from high school, still keeps in touch with Jungkook.

You ignore him when he enters the pool, still peering from the corner of your eyes while pretending to be engaged in Chaelin's and Jihyo's conversation. Your mind sabotages you by taking you to that day a week ago at the tattoo parlor.

To the warmth of his hand, to the few strands of hair that his small ponytail couldn't keep together, to the way his eyes focused on such an intimate part of your body, to the endless ink decorating his skin, to-

Great. Now your bottoms are wet and not due to the water.

You don't miss Chaelin supressing a laugh and her not so subtle elbowing. You glance at her in warning and try to keep calm for the next fifteen minutes until Jin proposes moving to the living room to watch a movie.

"I'm gonna stay here for a little longer, guys." you say, after clearing your throat. You needed some time to gather yourself before being in a confined space with Jungkook.

"Are you sure?" Jin stops by your side to place a hand on your shoulder as everybody starts exiting the pool. "It's Mean Girls! You love Mean Girls! You never miss a minute of Mean Girls!"

Rolling your eyes, you wave him dismissively. "I know every dialogue on Mean Girls like the back of my hand, I think I'll be alright, Jin."

When everybody finally leaves, you take a deep breath, covering your face with your hands in an attempt to get him out of your head. Damn Jeon Jungkook and his irresisitble glow up.

"You okay?"

The unexpected voice startles you, a gasp finding its way out of your mouth and causing you to jump on your seat, heartbeat erratic as you instantly recognize who it belongs to. Your hand grasps your chest as if that would do anything to protect yourself against him.

"Shit, don't do that!" you say, the words almost getting stuck in your throat as you see him approaching you, still submerged in the pool. The more he nears you, the less water depth there is and the more visible his torso comes into view. Wich was exactly what you'd been avoiding.

Because Jeon Jungkook was ripped, as you'd imagined when you first encountered him.

Broad shoulders and strong biceps and chiseled abs and veiny forearms. Drenched hair, a full sleeve of tattoos and water dripping from delicious tan skin and all just so very hard. That paired up with a loopsided smile that does nothing but make you shudder.

"Sorry." he doesn't sound apologetic at all when he says that, the smirk adorning his features telling. "You just seemed a little off." you advert your gaze when he pushes his hair back.

"I'm fine, just...just wanted to be by myself."

"Oh" Jungkook's smile disappears. "I can leave, if you want me t-"

"No!" you're not sure where that comes from and neither does he, judging by the look on his face when your eyes find his. Eyebrows raised and mouth slightly parted, he's as surprised as you and there's an awkward silence for a few seconds. "Um, you don't have to. I mean, it's not my house, you can do whatever you want." you sniff and tame your voice, trying to seem cool and collected like you didn't just practically beg him not to go.

Ironic, considering this was exactly what you had been fearing for the past thirty minutes.

And then he smiles. A knowing smile. A smile that says 'you just totally checked me out and now you don't want me to leave'. A smile that you would have never associated with Jeon Jungkook of all people years ago. A smile that makes you want to look away but still keeps you in place.

"Sure." he says, closing the space between the two of you slowly but still leaving enough distance. "So, how's it going?"

You clear your throat, head high and determined not to let this man, or any man for that matter, turn you into a trembling mess. You're still you and you're not easily shaken by the opposite sex. Or at least that's what you helplessly chant in your head.

"Everything's cool. I'm on summer vacation now," a little white lie, "so I decided to-"

"The piercing." he says, the smile never leaving his face. "I meant how's the piercing."

"The pier- right." you almost miss the step he takes forward, all too aware of his height over yours but thankful for the centimeters that being propped on the stairs added to yours. "It's-" you almost, almost miss his knee touching your knee and him slightly separating your legs with his own inch by inch. Or how your thighs open unvoluntarely to welcome him in and how you can barely find coherent words to speak. "It's doing-" or the way his smile disappears and is instead focusing his dark stare fully onto yours.

"It's doing well." you finally say in a whisper, not being able to bring yourself to be louder.

He hums. "May I see it?" Jungkook wets his lips with the tip of his tongue and the action and his voice is enough to make you nod your head, bewitched.

His movements are unhurried, his hand coming up to tentatively come in contact with the flesh of your clavicle. His fingers skim through your skin upwards, his touch is feather-like when it wraps around your throat. You pant, and he stops but he doesn't move away, his eyes still focused on yours, studying you, daring you to pull back, to tell him to back off. But just a simple touch of his and you're fully under his control. It reminds you too much of the day you got that damn piercing.

Your lips are parted and for a moment he stays just like that. His body so close to yours but not close enough, and his hand slightly gripping your neck. Your pussy clenches around nothing and you can't wrap your head around the fact that something so simple sets your entire being alive and leaves you aching.

Then, as slow as he started, his hand travels from the front of your neck to the back, pushing your hair aside to carefully untie the straps of your bikini. He breathes through his nostrils, doesn't make a sound. He seems so collected it's starting to annoy you.

Instead, your breathing is ragged when the top falls down, exposing both your breasts to him. That's when he removes his eyes from yours and his jaw clenches. Your nipples perk up under his gaze, like they remember him and the effect he had on them just a week ago. You're at least glad you're not the only one affected but he seems to be a master at keeping it under wraps.

Then, his hand moves again, leaving goosebumps on your skin as it goes south. Jungkook takes his time, so deliberate you want to scream, until he's cupping your pierced breast, keeping away from the nipple just like he'd advised you a few days prior. You can't look away from his face, from his eyes observing you like you're a full course meal and he's been starving for days. You feel drops of water falling from his hair to your thighs, his thumb caressing your skin so delicately as it faintly nears your still tender nipple. Just nearing it, never touching it.

"Beautiful." his murmur is almost imperceptible and for a moment you think you've imagined it. Your back arches on its own, breast pushed against the palm of his hand, almost like your body is begging him to come closer, to touch you more, to feel you all over. He meets your eyes briefly, gauging your reaction, before going back to your chest. Suddenly, the grip on your breast tightens, fingers ever so softly squeezing your flesh. From your throat comes a mewl, your eyes shut and your legs close around his waist.

"Jungkook, please..." you whisper when you open your eyes. He looks at you, unvertainty written all over his face, lips bruised as if he had been biting on them too hard, gaze as glassy as yours. And just like that, the spell is broken. He blinks and his expression changes completely. Lips forming a straight line and jaw tight. His hand retracts, fixing your bikini top over your breasts before tying it around your neck like it originally was. Meanwhile your eyebrows crunch in confusion. But when you're about to start asking questions, he clears his throat.

"It's healing okay." he steps back, avoiding your eyes. "I'll see you inside."

Jungkook leaves the pool like nothing happened.

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Jungkook is fiddling, fixing the position of his glasses and combing through his straight hair with shaky hands, habits he's tried so hard to get rid of in his sixteen years of existence but still finds impossible to.

He can't help it. He's always been like this: the quiet and awkward kid in class who sits in the back, a misunderstood puppy in a sea of stronger dog breeds that could eat him alive. An outcast. Too geeky for his own good. Notebokes full of Dragon Ball doodles on the margins of the pages, the shelves in his room stacked with Marvel figurines, and a closet filled with outdated clothes that he has been inheriting from his older brother.

He has never been the type to stand out, always being overlooked by people like he's invisible. He doesn't mind though. He'd much rather be ignored than getting picked on by bullies like he used to in elementary school.

He never gets invited to parties. Ever. He's a nobody who barely speaks, and when he does he either stutters or manages to embarrass himself in one way or another. He's seen the look on people's faces when they look at him. Their eyes seem to scream 'weirdo' everytime he gets acknowledged.

So obviously the only reason he was invited to this particular party had a first and last name: Kim Taehyung. The only kid in Jungkook's entire life who didn't look at him in a funny way, the only kid who took the time to entangle in a random conversation with him after class and who seemed geniune enough to make Jungkook feel comfortable.

He's not sure how it happened, since Taehyung mostly hangs out with the cool kids. But somehow it did, and now Jungkook is uncomfortably standing in a living room full of drunk teens, looking directly at you.

You, the one girl Jungkook had been pining on for God knows how long. You, who are obviously too pretty, too popular, and way out of his league. You, with your plaid skirt and your polo shirt and those legs that never seem to end. You, who are sitting with your friends in a couch, drink in hand and visibly tipsy. And yet, he doesn't think he's ever seen anyone pull of the 'drunk-rosy-cheek' look better than you.

He can hear your laugh through the music and he already thinks it sounds better than whoever is playing in the background.

"Come on, Gukkie! Her friends are leaving and she's all by herself now! It's your chance" Taehyung's obviously drunk too because it took Jungkook a while to decypher his exact words. He'd disappeared for a while and now that he's back, he's pushing Jungkook in your direction.

"This was a mistake, Taehyung." Jungkook shakes his hair and steps back, quickly glancing at the front door to prepare his escape. But his new friend's grip on his hoodie keeps him in place.

"Guk, listen. The only thing you have to do, is walk up to her, and say 'hey I think you're, like, really pretty. Just letting you know. Bye!' That's it. Jung- Dude, Guk, seriously, look at me." Taehyung grabs Jungkook's cheeks, squishing them between his hands and forceing him to face him. "You've been crushing hard on her for years, my man. We're graduating and you won't see each other again. What's the worst thing that can happen? Getting rejected?"

Jungkook's eyebrows draw together. "Um, yeah?"

"Exactly! Getting rejected is not the end of the world, bro! It just means keep trying on other girls!" Taehyung releases his hold on Jungkook's cheeks. "I just think you're going to regret not telling your crush she's your crush. Who knows? Maybe in the future you two will get married."

Jungkook snickers, muttering a 'yeah right' under his breath. Still, he can't help the smile that Taehyung's words always seem to pull out of him.

"Now," Taehyung playfully slaps Jungkook before turning him in your direction again. "Go get 'em, tiger!"

"Okay," Mijoo's voice slices through Jungkook's memories. She's sitting on Jungkook's desk, munching on her brownies and looking at her coworker expectantly. "And then what?"

He sighs, running a hand through his hair, sits back on his chair, already feeling the effects of Mijoo's baked goods. "And then I walked up to her, like a damn fool, stutter and all. And I say:" he clears his throat, making an effort to do his best teenage Gukkie impression."'Hey, _____, um, so, I think you're beautiful and I've had a crush on you since seventh grade, haha, just wanted to let you know.'"

Mijoo rolls her eyes, still chewing. "And then what?"

"And then she looked me up and down, giggled, fucking giggled, Mijoo, and said 'Who are you, again?'" Mijoo gasps and Jungkook closes his eyes, trying to force that recollecion out of his head.

"What a bitch." she can't help but laugh before apologizing. Jungkook merely shrugs his shoulders and takes another bite of his brownie. "She didn't say anything else?"

"She said something along the lines of:" he clears his throat again, this time, doing an impression of you. "'That's sweet and all but, you and I... we're not the same. And I have a boyfriend, so...' She said that like I didn't know, like I wasn't aware of the school's it couple! Like I was dumb!"

Mijoo nods. "And now you want to fuck her even more than you did in high school."

"I- No! Well, yes. Fuck, of course I want to sleep with her! But I just... can't."

"Why not?"

"Did you hear anything about what I just told you or were you too concentrated trying to get high?"

It's Mijoo's turn to roll her eyes. "I heard everything you just told me. I just don't understand what the problem is. You two were sixteen. Sure, she was a bitch about it, but Lord knows I've been a bitch my entire life and now I'm not anymore." Jungkook raises an eyebrow at that. "Okay, sometimes I can be nice. But the point is..." Mijoo finishes her piece of brownie before getting off of Jungkook's desk. "It's been, what? Nine? Ten years? People change, JK. You're the best example of that. You want to fuck her and she obviously wants to fuck you too. You're both adults." she wipes her hands on her shorts. "I think it's time you fulfill that high school fantasy of yours."

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You've made up your mind.

And by you, it means Chaelin has made up your mind.

It didn't take long to convince you though. That last interaction with Jungkook cause too many emotions stirring within you. It left you hot, it left you bothered, it left you confused. Sure, it also left you a little bit embarrassed like the first time, but above everything else, that interaction with Jungkook left you absolutely livid.

Because who the fuck did Jeon Jungkook, formerly known as Guk, Gukkie, Jungukkie, and currently known as JK, think he was to come near you, speed your heart rate's up, and then runaway like that?

You've spent days thinking about it. About that face, about that body, about those hands and- shit. You're doing it again.

You've spent days trying to push those intrusive thoughts. Spent days trying to bury what happened. You've spent days trying to keep quiet, not telling anyone about it and just wishing that stupid spark of desire simply went away.

But it has just been simply unavoidable. You haven't been able to ignore the sleepless nights with your brain drifting back to that night and forbidding your hand from slipping under your panties. Or the excessive amount of time during the day where images of him suddenly popped in your head and wouldn't go away, even with you squeezing your thighs to try to make the ache go away.

So you ended up ranting and ranting and ranting to the only person you could confide on, who is obviously your best friend. Your best friend, who's too smart for her own good and knows you too well for your liking. Because apparently your moodiness and snappy remarks couldn't go unnoticed.

And after explaining the fiasco over a bottle of wine -and minutes of endless laughing on Chaelin's part because, again, it's Gukkie you two were talking about and, according to her, this was "the most karmic thing I've ever seen"-, she gave you the best advice an older sister could ever give.

"Fuck him."

"I know right? Fuck him!"

"No. I mean, fuck him."

And now here you are. Right inside that room you stepped in weeks ago, confronting the man in question with the same confidence that has always distinguished you from others and trying to act like the fluttering inside your belly wasn't nauseauting.

"A date."

"Yes."

"You want to go on a date with me." this wouldn't be so hard if Jungkook didn't look so delectable in a plain white t-shirt and ripped jeans. You cross your arms over your chest, doing your best to not look down at the exposed skin of a man who obviously worked out a lot and apparently, never skipped leg day. "What's the catch?"

He's sitting on his chair, back resting comfortably and legs spread, narrowing his eyes at you and probably wondering why the girl at the front desk let you in without an appointment. Also, probably wondering if there was a catch to all of this.

"There's no catch. I just want to go to the fair this weekend. I'll ask Taehyung for your number and text you the date and the exact place we'll be meeting. Unless..." your quirk one of your eyebrows. "Unless you're already planning on how you'll chicken out this time."

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Of course, Jungkook says yes to going on a date with his high school crush but spends the following days overthinking every single thing.

He can't help but feel like it's kinda sketchy. What if you're planning your vendetta on him? What if you don't even show up and he ends up there looking like a damn idiot? What if you hate him and are just messing up with him? What if that incident in high school is going to repeat itself?

"If she doesn't show up, you simply move on and never speak to her again. It's that simple. She can't have that much power over you to cry about something like that." Mijoo had said that same day she let you in the tattoo parlor after you'd asked to see Jungkook. Jungkook's coworker hadn't even question you and just motioned you to Jungkook's room with a knowing smile on her face. Later that day, Jungkook had scolded her about it and she'd simply shrugged.

He considers cancelling, eyes reading the 'won't be able to make it, sorry (sad face emoji)' over and over again and fingers hovering over the send button so many times he's lost count. But then he remembers that comment of yours about him chickening out and Jungkook starts seeing red.

How couldn't you understand he's just terrified of you rejecting him one more time? Sure, Jungkook is now an adult who doesn't get butthurt over stuff like that. He's experienced too much after graduating from high school and he's a much stronger individual than his fragile self back was back then.

But something about you just makes him feel so... weak.

He still finds it impossible to concieve where he got the courage to approach you like that at Taehyung's pool, or how he brought himself to touch you for longer than a minute without coming in his pants. He'd enjoyed it too much. Allowing him to see you so exposed, just for him. He'd be so tempted to kiss you right there and then, to run his hands up and down your thighs and fully wrap your legs around him to let you known how much you'd affected him. Once you called his name, it was like he'd finally snapped out of it and backed away like he'd been burned by you. He spent the next twenty minutes trying to keep himself from pulling down his pants and jerking off in his friend's bathroom.

It's terrible. Because he feels like the teenager he used to be when you're around. Shy, insecure and overall a mess. You showing up in his life after so many years and now apparenly being interested in him seems like a dream that he's not sure he wants to keep being in or wake up from before it's too late and he falls back into that tumoltuous longing that will inevitably end up in heartbreak. His heartbreak.

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It's saturday night, he's standing by himself in the crowded fair at the spot. You're fifteen minutes late and he's already about to turn back and dip out. He feels too awkward and the nerves are eating him alive.

You're not going to show up. You're not going to show up and now he feels and looks even dumber than the time he told you he was crushing on you. You're not even going to show up and now he's going to come back home, get drunk by himself and curse your name for-

"Hey!" he turns around to the sound of your voice and sees you running towards him. "Sorry I'm late! I couldn't find my phone and spent like thirty minutes looking for it. Turns out, Sharon Stone, was taking a nap on top of it and I didn't even notice."

"Sharon Stone?"

"Chaelin's cat."

To be honest, he's too surprised to process your explanation right away. He might also be a little speechless because that sky blue sundress looks too good on your skin and your eyelashes are so long, framing your beautiful eyes, and your lips are all glossy and kisseable that it takes him a while to find his own voice.

He clears his throat. "It's alright." scratching the back of his head, he momentarely adverts his gaze from you in an attempt to not get distracted by how soft your hair looks and how much he wants to wrap it around his hands in a ponytail. "Um, where do you want to go first?"

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Almost an hour and a half later, when the sun has already disappeared and you're both surrounded by colorful lights, Jungkook decides to buy the both of you hot dogs and a drink and you both settle down on a bench.

You've been walking all over the fair, going from booth to booth, playing any game in sight Jungkook dared you to -he obviously had a competitive streak-: from the ballon and dart games, to the shooting games, to the bumping cars, to the ball-in-basket one. To say you were having fun was an understatement.

You'd almost regretted setting the date up. You were sure he wouldn't even show up and if he did, you were scared of how awkward things could get between the two of you. And if things were awkward, you were sure it would only take less than thirty minutes for the both of you to part ways and never talk again about such failure of a date.

To your surprise, none of that happened.

The conversation was flowing, both of you acting like you were strangers on their first date getting to know each other, which, to be fair, that's exactly what it felt like. There was a slight banter, teasing each other when one of you lost in whatever game you were playing while the other was obviously winning. There were laughs and a funny feeling in your tummy whenever you'd walk side by side and his arm brushed yours.

There was no stiffness on his shoulders, no mention of the past or your previous encounters, no acknowledgement of the blatant sexual tension you'd experienced before, not an ounce of avoidance whenever your eyes met his and he was even sure of himself enough to place a hand on your lower back or briefly interwine your fingers with his to guide you through the mass of people.

It felt like you'd both unspokenly agreed on making each other feel comfortable enough to have a good time.

"I didn't think you were going to show up, to be honest." you suddenly say, taking a sip of your strawberry juice and thankful to finally let your feet rest for a while.

Jungkook looks at you, hot dog mid air and eyebrows almost disappearing into his hairline. "You didn't think I was going to show up? I didn't think you were going to show up." you simply shrug, lowering your gaze seepishly, the beginning of a smile on both your faces. He surprises you by tilting your head in his direction with his forefinger. You watch him watching you, a little dazed, a little lost in how his dark hair messily falls over his forehead and his equally dark eyes study your face, his thumb swiping over your lower lip. "You um... There was ketchup right there." he lies.

"Oh" you say, feeling your face heating up. "Thanks. Red doesn't really match this dress." you manage a smile and tuck a lock of your hair behind your ear.

At that, he eyes your dress for a moment, mouth slightly ajar. He's debating on whether or not to say something but you beat him to it.

"I'm sorry, by the way."

"For being late? I already told you it's fin-"

"No." you shake your head. "For... that time when we were young and I was such a concieted brat." you say, looking away , trying to find anything else that's not his pretty face. "I thought I was a queen bee back then. I was annoying and rude, specially to you. I..." you lick your lips. The cherry glittery gloss was already gone. "I thought it was cute, what you said. There was no reason for me to act like that. I know this doesn't make anything right but..." when you turn to face him again, there's still the same expression on his face. "I'm sorry."

A few seconds go by before it's him who's shaking his head. "It's okay. It was a long time ago, anyway." he smiles at you, although it doesn't reach his eyes and seems sorta forced. You sigh, and he takes your hand. "Let's go to the ferris wheel."

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tell you're tense. You're sitting right beside him in the ferris cabin, your back is all straight, you're facing forward and he believes you haven't blinked for what feels like an eternity. He thinks it has everything to do with your conversation a few minutes ago. You were probably not content with his response but what could Jungkook do? There was really no point in apologizing for something that happened years ago, but at the same time, he didn't want to hold anything against you like a resentful asshole because it was really not who he was. But there was still a little bit of stingyness inside of him and he didn't know how to make it go away.

At the end of the day, here you were, on a date with him that you'd asked for, getting along and asking questions about him and laughing at his jokes and trying to start all over again.

But then the ferris wheel starts moving, and he finally understands why you look so uncomfortable.

It's the way you immediately grip his forearm, nails digging in his skin and he swears he hears the smallest gasp forcing itself out your throat.

"Are you... scared?" he tentatively asks.

You say nothing for a while, not moving an inch. He would laugh if you didn't look so pained about it.

"I don't like small confined spaces nor rollercoasters." you finally say through gritted teeth.

"It's not really that small and ferris wheels are not rollercoasters. " your nails dig deeper and he winces. "Okay, okay. You don't like small confined spaces nor rollercoasters, and that includes ferris wheels. So why didn't you tell me?"

"I don't know. I've never liked ferris wheels but you seemed excited about it, so..."

There's a silence after that in the environment, neither of you exactly sure of what to say or how to act. Until Jungkook moves one of his hands hands until it's resting on the one who's holding onto him for dear life, fingers caressing yours. The warmth of his hand spreads through yours and although it's almost July and you can already feel your sweaty back staining your dress, it's oddly comforting. What's more comforting even, is him twisting his body towards you and talking with the calmest and most soothing tone you've ever heard.

"Look at me." you do instantly, unwillingly, and kinda wish you hadn't. It's almost as if your body will do anything he says without question. Like he has some sort of power over it to just react however he wants. His eyes bore into yours and suddenly the cab doesn't seem so suffocating. "It's just you and me right now. We're not even on a ferris wheel." the corners of his mouth turn slowly upwards. You zone out the environment, suddenly too aware of him and how close he is and how loud the beating of your heart is to your own ears.

"Jungkook."

You swallow the knot in the back of your throat when he removes his hand from yours. It almost makes you protest, - now realizing you've losened the tight grip on his arm- , before it craddles your face, keeping you in place while bringing his body closer.

"You have to stop saying my name like that."

With his thigh touching your thigh, your whole demeanor melts. When he leans closer, and you feel his breath fanning over your lips, your eyes shut closed.

"Tell me I can-" he starts to say.

"Yes." you finish for him. He doesn't doubt on closing the distance between you two. His lips touch yours and your body shakes in excitement. It's just him lightly skimming your lips with his but it's already too much and at the same time, not enough. It has you deepening it, yourself moving closer when he kisses you again. It has you relaxing against him, the tenseness prior disappearing and making you arch your back when his tongue asks for permission.

But it's exactly then, the moment you open your lips to him, that has you losing your mind.

The sparks fly, traveling from your head to your toes and then settling on the pit of your stomach as soon as the kiss starts to turn desperate and rough. When he nibbles your lips with his teeth, it makes you mewl and whine and your nipples tight against the cotton of your dress. It makes the metal barbell to feel uncomfortable, slightly painful. And when he goes back to being messy and filthy with his tongue tangled with yours, your thighs close on their own.

He forces himself to pull his hand back and bring it down, finding the parting of yd opening them for him. "Wait," you say, your fingers wrapping around his forearm as you try to catch your breath."The ferris-" he shuts you up with another kiss.

"We're not on a ferris wheel." he reminds you, a soft whisper against your mouth. And for whatever reason, you believe him.

≿━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━༺❀༻━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━≾

"He fingered you on the ferris wheel."

"Yes."

"And you came before the ride was over."

You take a small sip of wine, your eyes focusing on the TV where a rerun of the Golden Girls is playing, although, to be fair, lately you haven't been able to pay much attention to anything else but a certain brunet with doe eyes and kisseable lips. "Yes."

She hums, stealing a handful of popcorn from the bowl between your thighs.

"How long did it took? Like five minutes?"

There's a pause in which you clench your jaw, your fingers twitching around the glass in your hand, and then you answer. "Probably less."

There's another pause, and then-

"Ha...Ha ha...Ha ha ha-"

You let her laugh. It's okay. You knew you had it coming.

Chaelin knows the pillow you throw right at her face is also something she had coming.

≿━━━━━━━━━━━━༺❀༻━━━━━━━━━━━━≾

It's not that you're mad.

Jungkook and you had a great time on that fair date, he made you laugh, bought hot dogs and drinks for the two of you and got you off inside the cab of a ferris wheel on record time with those magical, long fingers of his. Technically, there shouldn't be anything to be angry about.

Except it's been a week and you can't stop thinking about him, about wanting more, and about those words that he left you with after the ferris wheel ride ended, when you had tried to return the favor.

'Next time, maybe.'

And there hasn't been a next time.

The thought of texting him or giving him a call to ask for another date is persistent in your mind. It remains while you do the laundry or wash the dishes, while you shower, while you eat or while you spend your days at the beach with Chaelin. There's always the incessant desire to reach out towards your phone, unlock it and dial his number to beg for more.

But you'd never been one to beg, so you resist the urge everytime that feeling starts to creep up on you and it washes over you like a wave. You silence your phone and try to concentrate on making the most out of your summer.

It's one random night, when you're tiredly dragging your feet across Chaelin's apartment's carpet, yawning and ready to succumb to a well needed slumber, that you see your phone screen's lighting up with a message.

Your heart pathetically leaps inside your chest when you read his name.

'you free on saturday?'

You wish you could say you ghosted him, ignored his text and moved on with your life until it was him who begged you for another date. But the truth is you opened it in a matter of seconds and typed 'i'm free, why?' back in a rush with trembling fingers.

So now you're on the passanger seat of his car while he sits on the driver seat, the first saturday night of July, like he's Danny Zuko and you're Sandy Olsson, watching a vintage movie in a drive-in theater which plot you don't give a shit about, even if Jungkook's date plan idea made something inside of you churn with adoration.

And the only reason why you don't give a single damn about the movie playing in front of your eyes, is because you're hot. Way too hot. And the reason and cause is none other than the boy-now-turned-man sitting on your left.

You barely exchanged words when he picked you up, just rode in silence until you got to your destination and you bet he can feel as well as you do the tension in the air.

You've surveyed him a few times from the corner of his eye, noticing him fiddling with the rings around his fingers and shifting in his seat from time to time. And if the sight of his fingers bring memories that you've tried to bury to keep yourself from lunching towards him, a brief glance at his forearms, adorned with ink drawn through his golden flesh -doing a poor job at concieling the veins running underneath- and his skin-tight jeans wrapping those muscled thighs of his is enough to have you be the one squirming in your seat.

A woman can only endure so much, and you come to that realization thirty minutes into the movie.

"I want to suck your cock." you say, a stern expression on your face as you turn your body in his direction.

Jungkook frozes as your voice slides over him. It takes him a couple seconds to look at you, shock widening his eyes and parting his lips.

"Huh?" he manages, his grip on the steering wheel turning his knuckles white.

Without separating your gaze from his, you gather your hair and tie it in a ponytail with the hair tie previously around your wrist. You don't miss the quick glance he sneaks into the curvature of your neck and the valley between your breasts.

Inching forward, closing in on him, you place one of your hands on top of his thigh, the action making his whole body tense. "____..." he whispers your name in a warning that doesn't sound convincing even in his own ears.

You smile, your eyes never wavering from his as your hand inches upwards, slowly caressing over the fabric of his jeans until you finally come across what you were looking for.

His hand flies to your wrist, stilling your movements. "____, this is not-". He starts, but his voice gets stuck inside his throat when you palm his undoubtly growing erection.

"Shh." your shaky breath fans over his cheek and you force yourself on your knees on the passanger seat in a more comortable possition to stop the trembling to reach them.

You fumble with the belt holding his pants in place, then with the button and finally with the zipper. He helps you by lifting his hips to pull his jeans and boxers to his thighs and you have to bite back a mixture between a gasp and a moan at the sight below you. You haven't even seen Jeon Jungkook naked all the way, but the mere sight of his hard cock with pre-cum glistening on his crown is probably the sexiest thing you've ever had the pleasure of appreciating.

It gets sexier when you wrap your hand around the base and his body melts in the driver seat, throwing his head back with his eyes shut. It gets even sexier when you finally lower your head, swirling your tongue over the head before finally engulfing him fully in the wet warmth of your mouth.

"Shit." his voice is tight, uneven as his hand loosely grips your ponytail, as if careful not to accidentally hurt you and break the glorious moment.

Although you wouldn't mind at all. Because the moment your hands are on him, and your tongue is on his shaft, that's the only thing you care about. Your belly is twisting, an undeniable wet spot on your panties as the fabric sticks to your folds, and the more you suck Jungkook, the more you want from him. His earthy taste is addicting and the soft little whimpers he occasionally can't prevent himself from are making you want to milk him until he can't take it no more. There's this desire within you to whorship him and his cock like you had been dreaming for the past weeks.

"This is s-so fucking h-hot." he rasps between ragged breaths, the bobbing of your head, sliding up and down his dick as your hand works the centimeters your mouth can't take is about to make him faint.

"Getting a blowjob?" you joke, your throat starting to feel sore as you kiss his leaking tip.

"N-no." he draws in a rough breath when you take him all of him again. "You giving me a blowjob... T-the f-fact that anyone c-could see us..." he darts a quick glance at your body, your ass up in the air and your dress sliding down, almost exposing you completely. "The fact that-ah! Shit..." he squeezes his eyes when he feels a glob of your spit lubricating him.

There's a sudden need to make you feel the same, to touch your skin and have you shaking the same way you have him. So one of his hands travels from your spine, to your perked ass, finally dragging the cotton of your dress to allow himself to see your thin white panties. "The fact that anyone could see you l-like this," he murmurs, regaining a little bit of control when he squeezes one of your cheeks. "letting t-them see you s-sucking my cock and..." he smirks when he feels you gasping around him, his fingers trapped between your thighs and pushing them inside your heat easily "and letting them see me fingering this pretty little pussy."

Soon after that he's cumming in your mouth while you're cumming around his fingers.

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At first, it's mostly on weekends when you see each other. Weekends of stolen kisses and soft sighs and whispering against each other's lips. Then weekends turn to week days, sitting on grass while sipping on refreshing beverages, drawing each other laughs, elbows touching as you walk around the park side by side because the both of you are too scared to interwine your fingers together.

Jungkook feels content like this: sitting on the sand with you between his thighs, admiring the sunset while nuzzing your neck and inhaling your scent every now. He likes waching you enoying your strawberry ice cream, almost forgetting the chocolate chip one already melting in his hand.

"If you were an ice cream flavor,which one would you be?" you ask him, relaxing against his chest.

"Rocky road."

"Why?"

He shrugs behind you. "Everyone likes rocky road."

You hum, playfully rolling your eyes. "What about me? Which ice cream flavor would I be?"

"Lemon sherbet, in the summer."

"Lemon sherbet? Out of all of the flavours out there, you're rocky road and I'm lemon sherbet?"

"Lemon sherbet, in the summer." he corrects.

"Okay, fine. Why?"

"You're boring and basic."

You gasp, trying to feign outrage but not being able to repress the laugh that escapes your throat. You elbow him, his laugh mixing with yours while taking the time to wrap his arms around your form, the breeze blowing your hair allowing him a spot between your neck and your shoulder. "You're boring and basic, but once you have a taste..." he presses a small kiss on your skin, causing the tiny hairs on the nape of your neck to rise. "Once you have a taste, specially on the hottest day in the middle of summer, you can't stop tasting and licking until there's no more lemon sherbet left."

You suck in on a breath when he craddles your jaw to face him. "It's been my favourite flavor since I was a kid." he kisses you immediately after, his lips swallowing the small whimper now stuck in your throat.

You close your eyes as his tongue opens your mouth, arousal blasting your insides and something much, much deeper that you fear to even name shredding your chest.

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The beginning of august comes faster then you two realize, but what you both do realize is how hard it's becoming to stay away from each other.

It's been thirty days of dates happening almost everyday, sharing high school memories and anecdotes of the time you spent away from each other. Hours of getting to know each other and opening up to each other. From failed relationships to new friendships. Of park dates walking side by side and fingers now interwined because you both realized one day that, fuck it.

It's difficult to sleep when you realize you're starting to catch serious feelings for somebody who was just supposed to be a fling. It's hard to sleep when his face, his voice and his touch and thoughts of missing him when you don't see each other start haunting you at night.

It's hard for Jungkook to focus on work when you're everything that's occupying his mind. Because he has a hundred sketches to make but he's too busy thinking about the hundred different sketches he would make of you.

It's hard not to send him a goodnight text, just like it's hard for him not to reply in a matter of seconds, almost as if he was already waiting to recieve it.

Jungkook thinks of you at night. Of how pretty and absolutely perfect you are for him. Of the taste of your lips, the way your hair feels between his fingers, or the flush on your cheeks when he makes you cum as droplets of sweat accumulate between your breasts. He thinks about your voice. He also thinks about the amount of hours left to be able to listen to it again.

But mostly he thinks about how ridiculous this situation is. Because he was stupidly crushing on you when you were only teenagers, daydreaming about a chance with you. And now his crush is long gone and he's starting to realize that he's falling, and falling fast.

You, too, think of Jungkook at night. Of his ability to bring a smile out of you, to soothe you with just a few words and filling your belly excitement, happiness and feelings you're sure you've never felt before.

Jungkook's managed to imprint himself in your dreams, and you, in his.

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Getting drunk with Jungkook is fun and messy.

It's fun because he lets loose, he stutters a lot like he used to do when he was a teenager and he makes you laugh louder than ever before. It's messy because he has no control over his hands as they explore your body, clumsily taking your clothes off as his mouth laps at the breast he's allowed to touch.

He's more forceful and dominating too, pinning your hands above your head, and commanding you to keep them right there, on the pillows of his bed. When you rebel against it, your fingers finding the hard planes of his chest, he pulls away from you and places them back where he left them. "Don't make me tie you up." he threatens, and your body shudders beneath him.

He sucks, and bites and leaves marks all over your skin, grunting in response to your moans. Creating a path of kisses from your lips to your stomach, his shoulders separating your knees, opening you up only for him. And thankfully, when you reach down to tug at the strands of hair framing his face, he lets you, because he knows you need something to hold on to the moment his tongue eats you up. He leaves his fingertrips on your thighs as he keeps you in place, not allowing you to runaway. Just forcing you to take it as he takes from you.

And when you cum, he doesn't back away. He keeps sucking, and licking and punishing you with his mouth until you're cumming over and ove again, screaming and begging for his cock.

Having Jungkook over you, both completely naked, skin to skin and only sweat in between is more than you could've ever fantazised about. He slurls your name when he puts the condom on. He would do anything to feel you raw, but he also knows he wouldn't be able to last a minute. The sight of you spread open, with your cheeks darkened by a crimson blush and your hair tangled all over his pillow is a picture he wants to keep forever.

He enters you when you call his name, your voice dripping with need. He stretches your warm and wet felsh, slowly easing himself into you at first, until he's fully inside and your bodies are completely in union. A shiver runs down Jungkook's spine when he looks at your contorted face in pleasure, your lips forming an 'O' and your pussy clenching around him.

"Oh, my God." you moan into the dark of Jungkook's room, and even then, he can clearly appreciate every curve of your body lifting off the mattress to connect with his. He lowers himself on his elbows on either side of your head, caging you in and capturing your mouth with his.

"I know, baby." he murmurs. It's hot, in the middle of August but suddenly Jungkook doesn't hate summer as much as he used to. Not with you sharing the heat with him. "It's way beyond what I could ever imagine." You nod hurriedly against his lips, your arms finding their way around his neck as he starts rocking in and out of you.

"It's too good." you cry, when he hits a particular spot that has you rolling your eyes in bliss and gripping his waist tighter with your legs against you. Your fingers thread through his hair, not bothered by the beads of sweat gathered on the nape of his neck.

"Too good..." he agrees, not missing the shiver that's shaking your own frame when he picks up his speed. "You have no idea what I would do t-to fucking feel you with n-no barriers between us," his movements become frantic as his hips slap against yours, his jaw clenched as he keeps talking, "to s-stuff you full of my c-cum over and over again until it won't stop d-dripping."

Jungkook's voice against your ear has you trembling and your orgasm nearing closer, your nails scratching down his back as his thrusts overpower your form. "Would you like that?" he asks with his voice strangled.

"Y-yes. Anything y-you want."

"You'd take all of my cum like a good cum-slut?"

You hate the fact that that's what makes you come undone. The twisting and knotting in the pit of your stomach finally snapping until you're holding on to him like you never want to let him go and he's following soon after.

Because if Guk, Gukkie, Jengukkie was not only able to make you come in less than a few minutes with his fingers or his tongue, but he was also able to make you cum instantly just by calling you a good cum-slut, that means you're fucked. Like, really, really fucked.

≿━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━༺❀༻━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━━≾

There's a knot in Jungkook's stomach and a suffocating grip around his vocal chords as he caresses your skin. The sun is rising in the distance with the first rays of light entering his room through the window. Your shamphoo is intoxicating him, numbing him and enticing him to bury his nose in the tangled curls pressing against his chest. Your arm is thrown across his stomach, your breathing leavig goosebumps all over his body.

"It's too early. Go back to sleep." you mumble against his heart. He wonders if you can feel it dangerously speeding up.

"I can't." he says, voice struggling to stay balanced. "I have to tell you something."

You hum in response, sleep still interwined with your body, your arm tightening around him. You sigh in content, expecting him to elaborate.

He wets his suddenly dry lips. "I don't want this to end. In fact, ____.... I want more. Need more."

"Jungkook..." your whole body goes rigid right away, untanglling your bodies from each other and sitting up on the mattress.

"No, listen to me." he mimicks your movements, rapidly grabbing your hands to make you look at him. His eyes are expressive, a mixture of fear and hope swirling in his dark irises. "I wake up everyday, and you're the first thing I think of. I go on about my day, and I keep thinking about you, wondering what you're doing and counting down the hours until I get to see you again. I spend every night dreaming about you, and when we'e together, the only thing I can think about is how I wish I could stop time so I don't have to say bye to you the next morning. ____, I-"

"Jungkook, stop please." you shake your head, pushing away from him and in desperate need of air. You press a hand against your chest, beating back the throb of pain while the other curls in a tight fist, the feeling of your fingernails digging into your palm less painful than the ache inside your heart. "This... This wasn't supossed to happen, Jungkook." you start pacing around the room, as if trying to find an exit while avoiding his gaze. "This was just a summer fling. That's all it was, I'm supposed to come back to the city in two weeks and-"

"A summer fling?" a sardonic sneer comes out of him. "Oh my God, I can't believe this is happening again..." he mumbles to himself before rising from the bed. You stop immediately, a shiver quaking through you as his impressive frame intimidates His eyebrows are drawn together and his dark eyes are void of any prior emotion. "You're going back to the city in two weeks? And you didn't care to tell me until now, after I just spilled my guts to you?"

You eyes fill up with uncomfortable tears, reaching one arm towards him. "Jung-"

He flinches, taking one step back. "A summer fling is all I mean to you?"

"Ju- "

"Look me in the eyes, right now, and tell me that's all I mean to you. A summer fling." panic crawls up your throat. There's the need within you to confirm, to stare into his beautiful and stern eyes and tell him that, yes, that's all he is to you. But you've never been a good liar. So nothing comes out. You opt for wrapping your ams around yourself wishing they were his and lowering your eyes to the ground. "I think... I think you should leave."

Those are the last words he says to you, and the last thing you see when you turn around one more time after gathering your clothes, is his back as he looks out the window.

You allow yourself to cry the exact moment you step into Chaelin's apartment. Your friend is sitting on the couch, bowl of cereal in hand and a fresh cup of coffee sitting on the livingroom's table.

"Hey, you're early tod- Baby, what's wrong?"

"Please, don't laugh."

That morning, you lay down for hours on the couch with your head on Chaelin's lap while she softly brushes your hair as you cry, hiccup, fight through the pain in your heart and relate to her as best as you can the latest events.

She doesn't laugh at all.

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"She'll come back." Mijoo's slurred words do nothing to put Jungkook's state at ease that night. He simply shrugs, fingers clenching at his sides, frowing into his drink before gulping down the bitter taste of vodka in one shot. "Seriously, I think she's just afraid. My ex was the same."

"Comparing her to your ex is not the analogy you think it is."

"Ugh, shut up. Things didn't work with my ex because she was a bitch." Jungkook gives Mijoo a pointed look which she responds to by rolling her eyes and sipping on her rum coke. "Your girl is not a bitch. She used to be a bitch. What she did this morning was bitchy, but, like I said, she's just being a pussy. If she only wanted sex with you, she wouldn't have been doing couple stuff with you the entire summer."

"Whatever. I don't care." he lies and Mijoo knows he's lying but decides to drop the subject fo now.

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"We can't keep spending our days smoking weed." Chaelin speaks over Blanche's voice on the TV.

"I know. I'm just sad."

"You have to come back and tell him how you feel."

"I know."

There's a beat of silence before your friend kicks your thigh with her feet.

"I know and I will." you mumble through red eyes and smoke clouds.

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It's September first and it doesn't feel like Jungkook's birthday at all. He's been trying to focus on his work, alternating between isolating in full hermit mode and hanging out with friends to drink away his sorrow. The days have gone by and before he could realize it, he woke up today with over twenty text messages wishing him a happy day and a throbbing hangover.

He dresses up on autopilot. First a cotton shirt, then a pair of jeans and lastly, his Nike's. He doesn't bother tying his sneakers just like he doesn't bother taking a shower. He smokes a cigarette for breakfast, the death stick making him feel nauseaus on an empty stomach. And then he goes to work.

He's been repeating the same routing for the past weeks and he's not thinking of changing it, not even on his bithday.

He spends hours drawing, tattooing and drawing some more between yawns. He ignores texts an phone calls and simply waits until the day is over to go home, go to bed and forget about the fact that you're probably on your way to the city and that he hasn't crossed your mind not even once.

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Inkphoria.

You've been standing outside the shop re-reading the word for fifteen minutes, although it definitely feels like it has been longer. You're gripping cup of ice cream as it melts down your fingers the more you wait. The shop is already empty and it's starting to darken out side, and still you're so hot. Your shorts are heavy and your tank top is sticking to your skin. You didn't even bother to put on any make, although your eyebags definitely needed some concieling and your lashes some dimension to hide the fact that you'd been crying for the last few days.

'You're crazy about him.'

Chaelin's voice echoes inside your head.

You've lost count of how many times your best friend has given your advice, or simply encouraged you to do something you've been too scared to try.

'And he's cazy about you too.'

Chaelin might be wrong about marmite and the movie Cats, but she's definitely now wrong about anything regarding your and Jungkook.

That's it. You briefly close your eyes, inhale a deep breath then release it slowly. You start walking. It doesn't take longer than three strides and you're pushing the door open.

The tattoed blonde looks up from the counter the second you come into view. She smiles at the distance between you two. "You can come closer. I won't bite."

You clear your throat, stalking closer to her. "Is he-"

"He's in the back." she replies before you can finish you question. You close your mouth, clear your throat and nod your head.

"Thanks, Mijoo." she gives you a small wink, her smile easing your nerves like she had three months ago.

She watches you disappear. She shakes he head, her smile meeting her eyes. "I told him so."

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Jungkook ignores the knock on his door at first. It's almost ten and the parlor is about to close. He just has to finish this last fucking sketch so he can grab his shit and go the fuck ho-

Knock knock.

He growls, exhasperation cursing through him. He runs a hand through his messy pile of hair, his rings tangling between the strands, making him wince in pain. "Come in." he grunts under his breath. The door opens. "Mijoo, I really have to finish-"

He stops dead in his tracks as soon as he sees you.

"Hey." you say after a moment of hesitation.

"Hey." he replies and although there's something inside, deep in his chest, shouting at him to stand up, run up to you and kiss your face while he tells you how beautiful you look right now and how happy he is to see that you're still here, he decides against it. "Listen, ____, I'm pretty busy-"

"No, you listen to me." you cut him off abruptly. He looks taken aback and is already opening his mouth to say something, but you're not having it. "Please, just... Let me talk."

Silence looms between the two of you for a while, a staring contest defying each other to back down. When you take one step inside and close the door behind you, he sighs and leans back against his chair.

You move towards him slowly, your lip caught between your lip going through your mind for the speech you'd been preparing the last few days. Your hands are sticky due to the the sugary treat liquifying in your hand. "I know there's no reason you should give me another chance after rejecting you in high school, and there's definitely no reason why you should forgive me for the way I shut you out a few weeks ago. You've been confessing your feelings to me since we were teenagers, and now it's my turn to tell you exactly how I feel about you."

"Jungkook, the truth is... I like you so much. I like you more than I've ever liked anyone. Ever. I said this was just a summer fling, and I was lying. I was lying because there's no way a simple summer fling could make me feel the way you do. There's no way a simple summer fling could make me want not just summer with you, but also fall and winter, and spring and every summer that comes next."

You hadn't realize when your eyes filling up with tears until the sight of him starts blurrying in front of you. His fingers reach yours, his thumb comforting on your skin. "____, it's okay-"

"I'm not done yet." you sniffle, gathering enough courage to continue. "I brought you a lemon sherbet because you said it was your favourite. But you also implied I was your favourite, and I want to keep being you favourite, but now it's already melted and-"

The corners of Jungkook's lips start pulling upward as he tugs you towards him, his heart loudly jumping inside his chest. "Shhh, come here."

He takes the ice cream from your hand and places it on his desk. Then he's helping you onto his lap, your head tucked under his chin and your arms wapping on their own around his neck.

He doesn't care about your sticky fingers or the wet stains of your tears in his shirt. The only thing he cares about is the fact that you're right there, letting him engulf your frame and drown in the scent and warmth he'd misses so much.

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The first day of June has Jungkook sweating and wishing for a haircut. Jungkook usually hates summer. He hates the fact that he has to shower at least twice a day, and the fact that the heat is almost unbearable to sleep in and also the fact that he's easily sunburnt.

This year, however, Jungkook likes summer a little bit more.

"Excuse me, miss. Do you have an appointment?" it's the fact that you're starting to wear those summer dresses he loves so much, and the fact that your skin glows under the sun like glitter, and also the fact that he can lick ice cream off of it whenever he desires.

"I am the appointment." your giggle is almost childlike, playing with Jungkook's heart strings. You shut the door behind you, nearing him. You also seem to always have that flush on your cheeks. Although he likes to think part of it is due to him. He doesn't say anything else as he puts his pencil down and instead turns around in the chair to have you immediately on top of his thighs.

Yeah, he also likes the path your lips trace from his cheek, to his jaw, ending at the juncture between his neck and his shoulder. It still makes his body quaver to this day.

"Let me see." he murmurs against you forhear, his hand already working on unbottoning the front of your dress.

"Mijoo hasn't left yet." you whisper back, your smile impossible to supress and the faint whimper impossible to hide when his fingers expose your breast and tug at the titanium barbell adorning the already hardened nub.

Jungkook loves knowing he was the one to do that, and also the only one to play with it. He doesn't hesitate when he dips his head. "As if we'd ever cared about that." he adds, wrapping your sole point in his mouth.

He fucks you on his studio table with your legs around his waist and his tongue playing with both your breasts, the tattoo sketches long forgotten, scattered on the floor as he whispers against your flesh something that sounds a lot like 'I love you'.

[6okuto]

how'd u know i love to talk about myself and overshare. Wehehe... thank u for the tag!!! 🙆🏻‍♀️

started writing: Omfg. tried writing a luke hemmings x reader fic on wattpad when i was definitely not supposed to have wattpad almost a decade (🤯) ago. i don't think i wrote more than a few chapters before deleting it so my irl could follow me LOL

also tried writing one (1) jungkook thing when i was like 14 (it had like no plot & was mostly metaphors. sooo embarrassing thinking back on how my irls read it 😭💔), but then i didn't write again until tumblr 😭 some of you have watched my main writing journey from the start

started blogging: well known(?) nia lore… first post was december 2021… accidentally posted my asra relationship headcanons and here we are! but i was a lurker for a couple years i think

followers: 5.6k.... bizarre considering the long droughts i've put u all through + i only Rlly write for haikyuu 😭 i'm sure many are inactive or bots but 5k is still nonsensical like i'm just a girl fr… love u guys 🫵🩷💌 thank u 4 rocking w me.

communication: i don't. it's bad. i'm so bad dawg i'm so sorry to u all 😭 but i appreciate Every interaction and message !!!! 🥹🥹 i see an inbox/dm notif and go (!! :D !!)... i smile at my screen and think about ur message and how i could respond.. i pinky promise U r all Always On My Mind!! even if i don't reply to ur reaction I see it and go !! :00 YIPEE !!

really sorry i don't approach people…even moots... i DO really want to talk but i Still struggle to even follow people (back) because i get nervous. what if u don't want me to follow u. what if u think i’m stupid. i still only follow like 60 blogs because of this. fawk my stupid Baka LIFE bro IM SORRY 😭💔 i'm trying. i feel miserable and lonely when i think about this IMGONAN TRY HARDER PLS WAIT 🫵!!! thank u everypony who messages me despite it all. I will cry and wail and sob in front of u /pos /very grateful ☹️🩷🩷🩷🩷🩷

for me,, i Love leaving long reblog tags but i can get overwhelmed(?) at the thought so it can take ages to actually reblog ;; i also try 2 make it clear i rock heavy w interaction.. i hope i give off a friendly aura. pls. how i talk here is exactly what my irls get too,, ur all my friends. it's just that i'm akin to a scared cat that takes months to be comfortable ☹️

likes: they're alright!! i don't mind spam liking, it's kinda fun to watch and i've never dealt with any shadowbanning because of it.. i don't know where that idea came from to be honest 😭?? i appreciate them & i get why leaving tags can be nerve-wracking or awkward to do at first, so don't worry ! 👍👍

i do wish the ratio of likes to tagged rbs/comments was better, but i found a post from a couple years ago where i talked about how my ratio was also only like 10% rbs (not taking into account which actually had tags) so it's never been very good/gotten better… it was better with multi-chara posts—i'd post late at night and wake up giddy to read all the tags but that doesn't really happen anymore.. probably both because of my posts and how the community has changed.. it's disheartening to say the least so i try not to check a lot anymore 😭 just try to write what makes me happy 👍

requests: general relationship hcs r OK to ask for. but other than that they'll stay closed… i push myself to write a certain amount minimum and then get tired… and i feel so bad when i don't get to one/i'm not inspired… they sit there for months and months like girl just let it go.

i think they're still good and fun for events though! and i like when people ramble or just share thoughts with me so i don't Have to write a full post ^__^

writing: let me get all of This out of the way. i think i've gotten less creative over time tbh.. and a lot of my ideas are fun to daydream about but feel flat or boring or too short when i try to write them… and i wish i was more concise,, had better descriptions,, filled the work with more than action beats and movement (or Stopped adding them and just let the dialogue exist),, could write fun au’s and stuff other than fluff oneshots…

i have a lot of thoughts but,, it's all still fun when i've locked in!!! i really like writing and i'm probably not as bad as i think, but i'll keep trying 2 improve on the things i listed. i think i've gotten a little better atp at least!!! 🙂‍↕️🫡

hcs are generally easier to write, plus i get to be silly and ramble 👍 that's why i didn't even Write oneshots in the beginning… twas scary.. especially bc i had no experience w them...

i don't even consider myself a Slow Writer i'm just not creative. LOL. literally just no ideas. if i had them i'd write more 😭 will try to do more short .txt posts..

dialogue is still my strong point. pretty much all my fics start as what could be described as scene scripts 👩🏻‍💻 i try hard to make it fun but still realistic,, and i think my characterization is pretty good.. hopefully... (;ﾟ∇ﾟ) maybe not my smaus LOL

and i don't really write angst anymore but i'm alright at it! 👍 i also have my moments writing nsft stuff and part of me wants to make a sideblog for it but,, IDK. we'll see.

i also want to write for more fandoms but.. scary. scawyyy... scawy... or just more for the ones i Have written for tbh. LOL. cove... may ask for ideas 4 him 🫡

works i'm proud of. umm. …

notes wise idk for sure, i'm assuming it's clingy boyfriends with 14k and flustering moments with 12k. all my old multi-charas did well. I ROCK W THIS! they're rlly fun to do when i actually have an idea to work with, and they Take Time, so i'm not mad they did so well tbh. i'd like to do some again ^^

i liked the iwaizumi sitting on the lawn one but i didn't like the ending… confusing mood and not what i wanted so i deleted it ;; you know it's serious when i actually delete a post guys. but i was cooking! tried hard on it and it was fun to do :3 will maybe go back and revise the ending some day...

i also liked “the most attractive person in the room” !! largely because i got to write banter, but also i was pushing myself to write more than Action beats and Movement so i was happy with myself ^__^

the smau where they react to your new post... i don't even like the actual reactions that much,, but people liked the different reader pics and that made me really happy !! 🙂‍↕️ i want to do another part but i'd have to remake all the accounts so 😮‍💨😭

#THROWBACK, this post for LL where mc wanted to go back to earth. who's rocking with nia 6okuto angst. i miss writing it sometimes LOL i remember really liking writing this one.. the ideas just kept coming...

and here's a Bunch of parts of fics i'm probably never going to finish / post bc i have nopony to (not nervously) tag so. u might as well get something + i like them. yaaayyy!!! ε=ε=(ノ≧∇≦）ノ

(1 + 2, 3 + 4 (copium fic. mb if the beginning is cringe.), 5, 6, 7, 8)

Behind the scenes of a Tumblr Writer - Tag Game

Hey there, I love behind the scenes and since this is something that's rarely talked about, let me start the chain... if you feel uncomfortable with a question, just skip it. You can add some if you want as well.

Started writing: I wrote my first Harry Potter fanfic at age 10. Started posting around 15,16 years old. I'm now 31, so...

Started blogging: I started on a German fanfiction site around 2010/11 I think. Might have been earlier too, but back then I was mostly reading, no posting. I really started when I got into One Direction (very late, tbh)

Followers: Currently at 961, which is wild to me. I don't even know that many people IRL. I convince myself that half of them are bots tbh, so I don't freak out all the time.

Communication: The people I talk to regularly are: a few writers who answered after I constantly reblogged and commented on their works and a few people who commented and reblogged my work. Writing and blogging on here can be pretty lonely, depending on your personality and the time you're active (I'm from Europe and a lot of my followers seem to be living in Northern America, so there's the Timezone thing) ... And I found that the best way to strike a conversation is to reblog, comment, and to not be shy. I do wish I got more asks, though....

Likes: I actually filter them out. I have 793 original posts up at the moment. It doesn't give me anything to know how many likes a fic has other than to tell me which characters are liked more than others or maybe that one fic does especially well. My activity only shows me comments, asks, reblogs with tags, and answers to my own asks. I live for the tags and the comments.

Requests: I love talking to people about ideas. That's how I started the plotbunny game because I have so many ideas and so little time. And sometimes an idea just doesn't want to be written out fully. Requests are fun because YAY, I get some mail... but then I freak out because I don't really know how to write this NOW and then I freak out because it's been a week already, two weeks, wait, two months? I'd rather have suggestions where people tell me vague things like "I'd love to read something about this side character" or "Have you ever considered this character with a soulmate trope"? because then I don't have the feeling of failing the request when I write it a little bit differently.

Writing: I am a fast writer. I know that's one of my talents. I can churn out a oneshot of 1k words in less than an hour. People read slower than I write. That can suck sometimes because you've just posted this and you want to know what people are thinking but they're not as fast as you are. I do have a lot of ideas. I want to write constantly but my brain doesn't always want to. I am trying to respect that.

There are also certain things that I just feel wrong writing. I cannot write anything suggestive (I also don't like reading it) and everything past that gives me panic attacks. I can hardly write mean characters and jealousy feels so wrong to me that I cannot write it. I've also overdone it with the soulmark trope and now I feel like everything I write about it feels lifeless.

I write best in the mornings before going to work, but I don't have much time there. I don't need special music (but it helps), but I need to have at least some energy left and at best, no distractions. But I have been writing for over 20 years, so I will say experience helps a lot.

Tagging: @revasserium @shoulmate @lemurzsquad @screamin-abt-haikyuu @toomanygoldfish @satorisoup @emmyrosee @reverie-starlight @alienaiver and @writingsofanomnivore and everyone else who wants to join

[cherrycheridarling]

lockscreen | t.h.

tom holland x famous!reader

warnings: none just fluff

summary: tom goes on jimmy fallon for a game of 'show me your phone'. being the oblivious child he is, tom forgets about his lockscreen.

wc: 1.4k

"Welcome back! We're here again with the star of the Spider-Man series, Tom Holland!" Jimmy's announcement drew cheers from the audience. "Tonight, we are going to be playing a game called 'Show Me Your Phone'."

Jimmy went on to explain the game to the crowd as Tom sat across from him patiently waiting. Jimmy pressed on the button first and ended up showing the world that his last photo was a selfie taken minutes ago in the washroom. That gained a lot of laughs. Then it was Tom's turn.

"I'm terrified. I don't even know what's on my phone." Tom shook his hands before firmly pushing the button. It landed on the iMessage icon. "Oh? My last text message convo?" he began to unlock his phone. Eyes skimming over his lockscreen.

"Yup, and once it's locked in, you can't touch it." Jimmy reminded him of the rules as Tom quickly skimmed through his last conversation.

Tom ran a hand down his face before chuckling, "Oh, geez. Alright, some context, I needed help picking a tie for tonight and my mate, Harrison, is nowhere near helpful."

He placed his phone in front of the camera as the conversation appeared for the audience to read.

Tom: haz what tie? red or blue?

Harrison: youre ugly either way

Tom: you look like dolores umbridge. pick a tie ffs

Harrison: mm my babe umbridge. jokes. i'd say purple

Tom: you're gross and no help at all

Harrison: have fun babe the bed is waiting for you

Tom: don't make me puke before i go on the show

Harrison: puke on me daddy

The crowd bursted out into laughter along with Jimmy as Tom covered his beet red face in embarrassment. "He is going to kill me for showing that." Tom was laughing as he spoke.

"That's hilarious! Okay, my turn." Jimmy ended up sharing a voice memo of him reminding himself to do chores around the house.

Tom wiped his hands on his pants before pushing the large button again. It landed on the lock icon. "What does that mean?"

"You have to share your lockscreen."

Tom's posture visibly stiffened at the information given. He wished he had gotten some warning before coming on the show. A caution sign telling him to erase everything on the iPhone.

His lockscreen was a memory. A keepsake. You. A piece of his heart. A reminder of happiness and the loving moments you shared with one another. It was taken a little over a year ago at Zendaya's house for a get-together with a few close friends.

You were propped up on the kitchen island, a wide smile on your face. Tom standing in between your legs with his back to your chest. Your arms wrapped around his shoulders as he tilted his head and placed a kiss on your cheek. Jacob Batalon had captured the moment. A heartwarming interaction that you had both done an outstanding job at keeping under wraps.

You had been dating for nearly two years. How you had managed to keep it hidden for such an extended amount of time was a wonder to everyone who knew, including yourselves. It wasn't that you were both set on no one ever finding out, you just never saw the need to. It was your relationship, only meant to be shared between the two of you.

Tom hoped you wouldn't be mad if the world found out, but he enjoyed the privacy and the feeling of having something that was only his. Something he didn't have to share with the globe. Tom debated on his options. Showing the picture and making headlines for the next week or refusing to do so and ruining the game while making everyone suspicious of him.

The former won.

"Okay, um." Tom nervously let out a laugh, "Surprise?"

With shaking hands, he placed his locked phone on the stand and avoided looking into the crowd as reactions varied throughout the studio. Gasps, cheers, 'aww's, even some screams. Both of his hands shielded his expression from the cameras as he allowed the audience to examine the photo.

"Oh, my god! W-what?!" Jimmy stammered, shocked what his eyes saw, "That's Y/N Y/L/N! A-are you two?" his eyes flicked from the phone to Tom.

Tom nodded slowly, "Yeah, yeah. It is and we are. Nearly two years steady." this intel drew more shocked reactions from the habitants of the studio.

"This is amazing! We love Y/N! But wow, how did no one know?!" Jimmy was still in disbelief.

Tom smiled at your name, "I may be loose-lipped with movie spoilers, but this is proof that I can keep secrets."

Jimmy's mouth was agape, "I have so many questions and you are so lucky that we are out of time."

Tom released a breath he didn't know he was holding as Jimmy said goodbye to the cameras and they stopped recording.

As Tom made his way backstage to head to his hotel, his heart began to beat out of his chest as he thought about your reaction.

-

Lounging on his hotel comforter, Tom pulled out his phone once again and clicked on your contact. m'lady. Pressing the FaceTime icon.

Your bright smile lit up the screen, illuminating his mood like the sun on a stormy day.

"Hello, lover. To what do I owe the pleasure of this late night call?" you chuckled while sitting up against the headboard of your bed, Tessa laying beside you.

Tom couldn't suppress his grin at your presence even if it was through a screen, "Hi, darling. I didn't know if you would be awake. Isn't it nearly three in the morning there?"

You nodded and pushed your glasses up on your nose, "Had to run some lines with Tess before filming tomorrow. She's a great actress." you panned the camera over to the sleeping pup.

"Sometimes I think you're only with me for my dog." he joked with a light laugh.

"Shoot. I thought I had you fooled." you teased back, "Why did you call, bum?"

He scratched the back of neck and avoided looking at the screen. That was enough for you to know that something was up.

"What part of your movie did you spoil this time?" you chuckled.

Tom shook his head with a smile, brown curls flopping on his head, "Nothing about my film, love. More or less about us." he mumbled the last bit, but you heard it.

Your shoulders tensed involuntarily, "I'm gonna need more information than that."

"We were playing a game where you have to show certain things on your phone and I had to show my lockscreen and, well, you know what my lockscreen is." his nerves grew with every second that your face stayed expressionless.

"Okay. How did they react?" you stifled a yawn.

Tom's eyebrows furrowed at your response, "Y-you're not mad?"

You chuckled, "Do you want me to be mad?"

"No, no, no." he quickly protested, "I just didn't know if you were ready to tell the world about us and I'm sorry for not informing you before making that big of a step in our relationship."

You smiled at the caring boy in your life. His thoughtfulness overpowering any negative emotions that could've surfaced. You weren't mad at all. Two years was a long time to keep a relationship hidden especially when both of the parties are well known to the public.

"No need to apologize, mi amor. It was about time everyone found out. Long overdue if you ask me. I would've appreciated a heads up, but I'm not mad." you insisted, and it was true.

Tom visibly relaxed at your words, "The audience was shocked and some gushed and screamed. Can't wait to see the headlines and news articles tomorrow."

"I can see it now: 'Spider-Man Actor, Tom Holland and Actress, Y/N Y/L/N's Hidden Love'." you spoke in a mocking voice making your boyfriend laugh.

"Can't forget; 'All the evidence of their relationship that the public overlooked'." he joked in the same tone as you both laughed together joyously.

Your laughter died down while a peaceful smile lingered on your lips, "I'm glad you had fun tonight. I should get some rest. Need to be in hair and makeup at seven."

He nodded understandingly, "Have fun on set, darling. I'll talk to you later. Goodnight, sleep tight, sweet dreams."

"Goodnight, sleep tight, sweet dreams, lover." you gave a little wave before ending the call.