#wine mother who goes from 'no dont hand it to me' to 'what the fuck did you say about my baby boy? no say it again i fucking dare you'

[pettyprocrastination]

lore we have decided on for oberyn martell with @joel-mlller @thesadvampire

his only son is absolutely pathetic when it comes to physical activities. cannot throw a ball without tripping over his own two feet. Has been this way since he was a child and will be as an adult. becomes competent through years and years of training but even grown up he’ll still trip walking up stairs and thwack his head on doors. As a baby you might as well either never set him down or put that baby in armor cause that mfer is falling all over

1. is he yours? no. you (oberyns wife) never wanted to sire children and never will. but when he brings the babe home his little infant brain looks at you and goes ‘ah. that is mother’ and will outright refuse to be told otherwise. Will shriek and cry all goddamn night long until you come in and bounce him in your arms and he will finally settle. Always doing the uppy hands for you and mumbling “muh???muh???” to get your attention. Loves ellaria as second mother but YOU are prime mama despite your lack of maternal instincts you just sigh and go ‘well. i guess this is my baby now’ and are his mother. Oberyn thinks its hilarious but also seeing you motherly kinda makes his breeding kink go crazy. 

[radio-to-trenchcoat-demons]

to quote recent events...

"Buzzy from afar. that's what they say about me too"

"All good, smiles"

"No, lloyd is gonna slip in"

"Hablo espanol?" "There a way i can spin that and make it totally offensive" "Oh yeah? Try mother fucker, Try"

*They smash the bottle opener over the remains of the 'plant'*

"How deep is this supposed to go?" "Oh, well..."

"yeah, you get a lot more drunk than me" "well yeah that's because im smaller" *a chuckle from Wilbur*

OUT OF POCKET: it is funny to make fun of lightweights. but not in a rude way, more of a /pos way. :] like, im bigger boned/ bigger framed or smth and i know im not a lightweight so i make fun of my other mutuals for being lightweights (in a /pos way)

"I'd love to do a *fucking* weed stream"

AL IMPUT: fuck yeah id watch that. im smokin' on the other side of the county with yous.

"AHH!" "lloyd is transparent" "fuck, you've got lloyds piss man."

"Like, isnt white wine worse?" "well, its the less horny option"

"Its like the one all the middle aged moms drink"

"And the waiter will say 'i didn't know you were here with your sister' and you'll say 'well, no, she's actually my date' and he, and he goes ' ohhh she looks so young' and then, and then she likes you more. "

" lloyd! "

" my man just, like , bloody hands, crunching through the like, shards of broken porcelain like, HERE BABY HAVE SOME WINE"

AL INPUT: ....THIS BASTARD. i love the marrage joke. thats fucking hilarious. dont worry, he's not married, maybe to big q, but only platonically. thats just too fucking funny. :3

"Why the fuck are you calling me on Whatsapp audio?"

"I couldn't do it "x2 "Oh yeah man, i just got a crazy ass call."

"Yeah who the fuck uses Whatsapp audio?" "Yeah man, up top"

I'll do more quotations tommorrow. time stamp is at about 30 minutes :]

[technowoah]

since I'm a gremlin I can ask for a c!Schlatt angst fighting with reader while he's drunk and the reader is just fed up with dealing with him and goes "IF YOU LIKE SO MUCH TALKING YOU DON'T NEED ME I'M LEAVING!" and just walks away and he realizes the shit he's done?

(the same anon who wasn't prepared to be heartbroken-)

Heartless

Somehow you find your way back to Schlatt again and it never goes as well as you think.

- c!schlatt x reader

- angst

- anon!requested

- part 1 to this story

⚠︎: swearing, angst, alcoholism, mentions of dying, c!quackity makes a appearance, hopefully this is sad enough yall-

An// i decided to make this a part 2 to Have a Heart! So I hope you enjoy love!

The night is still cold and dark as you begrudgingly walk back to one of the buildings that was put up to replace whatever L'Manburg was there before. 

After Dream's word you had still contemplated going back to Schlatt. He doesn't deserve what you do, but you still end up walking along the Prime Path back to the drunken man. You had no end goal and that was a problem. You probably were going to be embarrassed that you came back to him. You couldn't let Schlatt die, from either the hands of someone else or let him die from himself.

You eventually found yourself in front of the metal doors that led into endless hallways of offices nobody occupied. The offices that had wine and cigarettes for Schlatt to smoke just in case he decided to have a meeting in a room that isn't the official meeting room. 

Walking down the hallways you saw that most of the doors to each office were open and most of the alcohol and cigarettes were taken from each room. You peaked inside every room to see if Schlatt was in there, but something in you told you not to because you weren't prepared. What were you going to say? Stop drinking? Because you're sure he'll know he's not going to stop. You want to try to save him.

You slowly opened a door to reveal an office that looked an absolute mess. The small refrigerator was knocked over and all of the wine off the shelf was either shattered on the floor or gone. There were cigarette butts on the ground and lit a cigar, there were also papers and folders all across the room.

You whispered as you walked around the lit room "Schlatt must've been in here."

"Sure as hell he was!"

You spun around to see Quackity looking disheveled as ever. He had a bottle of liquor in his hand, his beanie threatened to fall off of his head and his suit now only a white button up with his dress pants still on.

"I've been running around this goddamn place trying to keep that ram man at peace! He's gonna drink himself to death." Quackity huffed while looking around the hallway.

"I know." 

"That's why you're here huh?"

You sighed at the realization. "Yes it is. I don't want him to drink himself to death. Death isn't what I want."

"Well, it's too late for that." Quackity faced away from you not wanting to look you in the eyes.

You stayed silent until Quackity spoke up again.

"You want me to take you to him? Wanna see him one last time before he dies-"

"Don't say that!" You rolled your eyes 

"Are you fucking kidding me? It's inevitable Y/N! His body is now 70 percent alcohol and his lungs are filled with smoke!" Quackity laughed in disbelief. "I don't want him to die! But its fucking inevitable. Either from someone else or-"

"Himself." You finished his sentence.

"Exactly!" He opened his mouth to speak again but apparently decided against it.

Quackity began to lead you out of the office and down the long hallway you two walked slowly not even knowing where Schlatt was in the whole building. You and Quackity made small talk.

"I hate this. I had to find this liquor and deliver it to him and now I can't find him."

"I came here to try and save him from himself and you're here feeding the problem."

"What else do you want me to do?" He grunted.

"Stop him!"

"If I stop him he's gonna be even worse so-!" Quackity threw up his hands in frustration as you two kept walking.

"I actually have something to tell you." Quackity spoke up after the silence.

"Quackity! Ah there you are!" Schlatt came around the corner behind you both and you turned around to meet the man you both have been looking for stumbling down the hallway.

"Ah you bitch! I thought I told you to leave!"

"Here we go." You rolled your eyes.

"Hey Schlatt! Here's the Liquor you wanted!" Quackity tried to liven up the situation by reaching the bottle out to Schlatt.

"He doesn't need it."

"Yeah I do, who are you to tell me what to do!" Schlatt yelled, not even taking the drink out of Quackity's hand. 

"Schlatt just calm down-"

"No! They made a mistake and they cant even do what I fucking say! They'll keep coming back to me, against my wishes!" Schlatt interrupted Quackity while flailing his arms around.

You stood still not wanting to hear him anymore. Ever since he won the presidential debate the first couple of months he's been sober with only a few drinks here and there. Now he's a full on alcoholic, only damaging himself and his presidency. It's a sad sight to see and you don't want to see it, so you can either run away and know it's still there or fix it and never see it again. 

"Schlatt I want to help." You hesitated before stepping forward.

"Same here Schlatt." Quackity agreed with you.

"You, you! Aren't any help!" He pointed directly at you while trying to keep himself upright. 

"How aren't I any help!?" You yelled back. "I've done everything for you and now you're digging yourself a grave Schlatt!"

"You think you're the best thing ever huh?! Im fucking fine! I can stand on my own two fucking feet!"

Schlatt wasn't standing up straight, he was stumbling either backwards or forward. His body threatened to fall onto the marble floor and he couldn't even stand up straight. His speech was slurring together as well you could barely understand him.

You finally responded to Schlatt. "Schlatt you're stumbling around like- like I don't even know what! I can't understand you and you just need to stop!"

"You're so useless! Not useful to me or my presidency! I can stand up straight and I'm completely fine shut the fuck up!" He yelled while leaning to the side.

"I'd rather die alone! Without you or Quackity." Schlatt yelled again

"That's what you're going to do anyways." Quackity whispered under his breath.

Schlatt kept babbling nonsense as his back slid down one of the walls as he sat on the floor. Head pulled to the side. It was a sad sight to see, you hated to see this man drink himself to death and apparently Quackity, who was looking at the ram man the same way, standing silently next to you.

"Schlatt this-"

"I dont fucking care what you think! You're the worst person I've ever met! You both made my life hell and that's why Im fucking drinking my life away so I wont see any of you're fucking faces!" Schlatt tried to stand up but failed in doing so.

He continued talking. "I am the best thing that happened to this country! I saved both of you from a tyrant! And you thank me by driving me into this state!" 

You felt your eyes threatening to spill tears the second time today.

"Schlatt that isn't me that's doing this shit!" 

"How the fuck would you know?!" 

"I can't. But Ive done every fucking thing for you! You cannot say I haven't!" You yelled back as he rolled his eyes with a rebuttal already on the tip of his tongue.

"Sure as hell I can! I have fucking proof-!"

"What proof?!" You interrupted his babbling even though he kept going.

"I- I!" he stammered not having a rebuttal this time.

"You're incapable of doing anything Schlatt let someone help you for fucks sake-"

"I'd rather die alone than sit here and be lectured by the likes of you!" Schlatt yelled.

"You are going to die alone, old man!" Quackity spoke up. "That's what they're trying to tell you!" 

"You shouldn't be giving me a lecture! Im the mother fucking president! I should be talking, but apparently its not fucking work-" 

"IF YOU LIKE SO MUCH TALKING YOU DON'T NEED ME I'M LEAVING!" You interrupted him and stomped down the hallway for the second time today.

As you walked down the hallway you heard a faint "wait" from Schlatt on the floor. You stopped and looked back to see Schlatt looking at you with some sort of realization in his eyes. Quackity was standing over him shaking his head.

"You know what? I don't even know why I helped you. Probably for power, but I don't need you for that." Quackity walked away towards your way. "Go ahead and die alone like you said old man." 

Quackity caught your gaze and he smiled and shook his head again. He finally reached where you were standing and started talking to you.

"Maybe this isn't a good time, maybe it is. But I am joining Pogtopia. Wilbur said he needs a lot of people for this to work so consider this an invitation." He gave you a thin lipped smile and walked past you giving you a good look at Schlatt, laying fully on the ground.

"Y/N wait, just hold on for a second." Schlatt said while on his side, not even bothering to look at you.

You didn't say anything and followed Quackity's path, down the hallway and out of the door. Behind you, you could only hear the distant groans and pleas of the drunken man behind you. You tried your best to help and that's all you could do. But you couldn't watch that man die.

Taglist: MCYT Imagines: @annshit @bobaducky @malfoysslutt @alec-lost-bee @egorldevi

[moonlit-imagines]

Headcanons for being Tony Stark’s stepkid

Tony Stark x Potts!child!reader

warnings: alcohol mention

a/n: i rushed these so bad i just wanted to post dhhshsnsna

prompt: y/n is pepper’s kiddo!

it was just you and your mom for a long time

pepper and y/n potts

she couldn’t keep up with you sometimes, too busy dealing with the manchild that was mister anthony edward stark

speaking of—

“uh, who’s this?” -tony, pointing at you

“mr. stark, i am so sorry, the school closed because some kid set fire to the science lab and i didn’t have time to find a sitter—”

“no, it’s fine, no need to apologize. hey, kid, you wanna sit in the boss’s chair? i’ll let you run the company for the day!” *cue you nodding* “sweet, would you mind that, ms. potts?”

“oh? no, not at all” *mouthing* “thank you”

“so, uh, what’s your name? no, don’t tell me: ketchup.”

*giggling* “y/n”

“no way! that was my second guess!”

tony wasn’t used to being around kids

he had no idea that he was actually kind of good around them

despite a few minor hiccups

“you sit in my chair and im gonna spin you around, sound like fun?”

he spun you around WAY too fast and you were diiiiizzy, also you fell off the chair

“don’t tell your mom that we did that. she may be my assistant, but she scares the shit out of me. also, don’t say ‘shit’”

dude he just thought you were a cool kid!!!

“hey, you know, ms. potts, you dont really need to hire a babysitter anymore. y/n’s doing just fine hanging out here”

“how am i not surprised you befriended an actual child?”

she still took him up on his offer, you seemed pretty happy

when your mom worked late, you passed out in tonys office

tony and you had your own little secrets (like falling off the spinning chair), tony showed you around stark tower, and you practically lived there

“i got you a happy meal from mcdonalds!” -tony every day after your school

in all honesty, you weren’t the “popular” kid at school...not even close

but tony made up for it

“y/n! i found this old racecar toy in a box of old stuff, you wanna hold onto it for me?”

you kind of grew up in stark tower tbh? it was pretty cool

and as you grew up, you started to notice more

“mr. tony, do you have a crush on my mom?”

“do i what? no, no, i do—who the hell am i kidding? you caught me”

“called it!”

after that you did everything to try and get them together

when your mom was talking to tony, you would stand behind her and wiggle your eyebrows and just taunt tony endlessly

no! tony cannot remember your mom’s birthday for the life of him! you are his calendar now

“dude, why dont you just ask JARVIS to remind you?”

“i may be a genius, but that doesn’t mean i have common sense”

“wise words, sir” -JARVIS

when tony disappeared for 3 months you were so sad???? like you were not okay at all

no

and when he came back, he literally exited the plane saying “WHERE’S ‘T-POTT??’”

(your wonderful nickname. ‘t’ for ‘tony jr.’ and ‘pott’ for ‘potts’)

“my mom missed you”

“oh, i bet she did”

“you turned my child into you, tony. i will never forgive you for this”

“well, at least y/n was here to fill in for me, huh?”

tony wanted to show you the arc reactor but he was actually afraid of scarring you lmfaoooo

but he did let you in on the iron man secret (he knew you wouldn’t snitch)

and just to make sure:

“if you dont tell anyone, i’ll buy you a car when you turn 16”

“man, that’s like, forever away”

“good, maybe you’ll forget by then”

ur mom kinda maybe sorta found out abt iron man :/ she told you that tony was a bad influence

“mom! no, tony’s cool! he’s like a superhero”

“no, sweetie, he’s a rich guy with issues. we’re leaving”

that didn’t last long

not long at all

and soon they FINALLY got together

“jeez, i thought you two would never stop pining after each other”

“couldnt have done it without my wingman” -tony *fistbump*

“as thanks can i have my own iron man suit?”

“yes.” *pepper glaring at him* “no.”

sooner or later your mom and you moved into tony’s house and you got a really big room!!!!

it was completely decked out

king sized bed, flatscreen tv, mini-fridge, microwave, computer, your own bathroom with a smaller tv, a poster of tony??? (you vandalized it and put it in his workshop), and more!!!

okay you were spoiled

“do you like it here? are you sure i made the right choice?” -pepper

“are you kidding, mom? this is awesome! plus, you’re happy, i’m happy, tony’s happy, i think JARVIS is even happy!”

“i am, mx. potts. simply ecstatic” -JARVIS

pepper was really happy!! it was a pretty cool family

you started giving your school tony’s number if you ever got in trouble, you knew he’d cover for you

“mr. potts, is it?”

“sure”

“your child, y/n, punched another student in the face today. we’re very disappointed in their behavior”

“why’d they punch the kid?”

“well, the other student punched y/n first”

“HAH! thank you for wasting my time. send y/n back to class and call me back if something important comes up”

he literally gave you a high five when you got home

“i gave him a black eye!”

“i couldn’t be more proud. i mean, i dont condone violence, but self defense is a whole other story”

a little help in the workshop, tony asks you to hold the flashlight

“why don’t you get one of your robots to hold this for you?”

“are you kidding me, you’re complaining? we’re having stepdad/stepkid bonding time! and dum-e can’t do anything right, i dont trust him”

youve had a few theme park trips as a family ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

also tony has 100% told you to wait in the car and then left you alone for 2+ hours

“i’m not like a regular dad, im a step-dad. want some beer? you can have a little sip. i’d rather you do it in the house”

your mother actually does love how he actually cares about you!

“y/n is 12% my responsibility” -tony

“tony, you are impossible” -pepper

no avengering for you! pepper said no!!!!!!

disappointed but not surprised

iron man 3: y/n potts is put through the wringer

Text Message to Mr. Tony: bro you better come get your girl, me and happy are watching this other guy flirting with her. he’s showing her pics of his ‘big brain’

Mr. Tony: HE WHAT

Text Message to Mr. Tony: Tony he looks creepy i don’t want him to be my new stepdad do something!!!

anyways ur house kinda blew up and ur mom and you kinda got kidnapped and u were right abt that guy being creepy and thankfully no experiments were done on you but like your mom kinda almost died and her and tony were fine!!! all good in the end

you met mr. col. james rhodes that day

“aw, you’re the kid ive heard so much about” -rhodey

“you mean the coolest kid in the world?check.”

“you cant tell me you aren’t tony’s biological child, good god”

you got to meet the avengers later on too! (you’d already met natasha tho, only briefly)

“i know it can be a little overwhelming, right? meeting all these heros, legends even—” -rhodey

“oh, my god, is that thor? thor!!” -you, leaving rhodey in the dust

literally why does pepper trust you around tony something always goes wrong there were literally robots attacking, you were only at avengers tower bc your mom was busy with the company and she thought you’d be safe with the avengers. the AVENGERS.

“please dont tell your mom that i created a bad robot that tried to kill us. the robot will be the least of our problems” -tony

he made happy pick you up and you had to miss out on FUN and it sucked a lot

“it’s okay, y/n! i’m fun, too!” -happy

then your mom and tony took a break and your life got mega-boring for a while, but they weren’t separated for that long. you try not to think about it. it was brutal

Mr. Tony: Does she miss me?

New Message to Mr. Tony: I think so. Either that or she’s crying and drinking wine in the dark for no reason.

Mr. Tony: Damn it, now I feel bad. I miss her a lot. Oh, also, the Avengers say ‘hi,’ I’m in Germany with some bad news, I’ll explain later if you don’t see it on TV first, and I found you the perfect friend! His name is Peter and I think you’d like the school he goes to, it’s in Midtown. Smart kid school.

New Message to Mr. Tony: I’ll look into it, thanks. Also, I don’t like how those all connect. Please update me asap

watching the news to see several avengers arrested, cap on the run, and more!

“maybe it was good i didn’t fall in with the avengers”

tony and pepper finally got back together and you actually transferred to midtown high! peter and his friend group accepted you quickly, it was great. you and flash unfortunately had the most in common

you’d literally text happy right next to peter and he’d immediately reply to you. it hurt peter’s feelings

Momma: Sweetie! I’m working in the office late, leftovers are in the fridge, hope you have a wonderful day at school! 💕

👉👈the vulture tried to kill you for being tony’s stepkid, tony made peter promise to protect you

“y/n, you gotta stay out of harm’s way. mr. stark gave me an actual mission and it’s terrifying, i have to make sure you stay safe”

legit why the fuck was this old man tryna kill you bro grow up

anyyyywayssss your mom and tony got engaged!!

“wow, i thought the day would never come!!” -you

ppl told you tony isnt your stepdad bc ur mom and him werent married but who tf asked

why is the earth always in fucking danger

you and peter were just vibing on the field trip bus and all the sudden: space donut

“go! i’ll cover for you...FRIDAY, call tony”

“...hi there, little one”

“what the fuck”

“oh, so you see the aliens, too? well, at least im not crazy”

tony stark has left the atmosphere

you and your mom were kinda......not chillin tho

she and you didn’t sleep for a few nights, then ppl just straight up disappeared

plot twist: you survived the snap and your family was lucky to be alive, you even got a little sister who became a big handful!

only bad thing was all your friends dusted and you were pretty lonely

but watching morgan grow up kept you busy

“ahhh, shes so big!”

happy times in bad times

bad times!!!!! bc after five years thanos came back as thanos from like ten years ago. outdated thanos. obsolete thanos.

but you made your first and only appearance in the suit tony actually designed for you many years ago

you should have just stayed home tho bc that fight didnt pass the vibe check

“please dont tell me he...no, no, no, no, no”

you and your mom latched onto each other in tears, tony was one of the best people in your life, he made you and your mom two of the happiest people on earth

best stepdad a kid could ever ask for

taglist: @alwaysananglophile // @rorybutnotgilmore // @locke-writes // @sweetheartliz07 // @queen-destenie // @natasha-danvers // @lokihiddles // @frostedgiantfavs // @emygirl // @lotsoffandomrecs // @johnmurphyisbisexual // @teenwaywardasgardian // @pappydaddy // @captainshazamerica // @freya-xo // @ravenmoore14 // @purpleskiesstorm // @ofthedewthesunlight //

[cicinicole-14]

Hi for the ship thing and headcanons, please do jolex 🥰

Who is a night owl:

dont get me wrong, they both most definitely will stay up late together or both pass out before 9pm on a Friday night, but some days when the depression hits, its jsut different and Jo is definitely more of the night owl. Alex is more of a morning person and Jo would rather sleep like the dead. 

Who is a morning person:

as we’ve discovered, more so Alex esp when they have kiddos. Alex is the one to get up with them early and let Jo sleep, he makes breakfast with the kids’ help and keeps their room quiet for jo to get some extra sleep but will unleash their evil spawns when he deems she’s slept in long enough. 

Are they cuddlers:

some days, yes, mostly. jo definitely loves the affection from someone who genuinely loves and wants her back. but there are days where she literally is like “do not come near me with your (temperature) hot body Alexander Michael Karev, you are a heater and I am already too warm” 

Who is the big spoon and who is the little spoon:

Alex is def the big spoon. Jo likes cuddling into him because sh feels safe, he feels like home. but she def has big spooned him too it’s a 50/50 relationship we have equal roles people

What is their favourite sleeping position:

no lie, both spread out like starfish in their bed. 

Who steals all the blankets: 

Jo. Alex is a space heater and doesnt need blankets she freezes and likes being snuggled up and warm

What they wear to bed:

I mean some nights, nothing, but like jo def loves Alex’s old Iowa state shirts or his wrestling shirts from HS that smell like him. an old worn in t-shirt, anything with a pair of booty shorts or his boxers even. and Alex will just wear a t-shirt and boxers or flannels in the winter. 

Who likes seeing the other wearing their t-shirt:

Alex wholeheartedly loves when jo wears his shirts unless its his favorite flannel and she steals it “come on, jo. you know that’s my favorite one. I wear it all the time.” its exactly why she takes it. 

Who falls asleep mid-conversation:

jo, unintentionally. sometimes the insomnia hits and she won’t have slept for a couple days so when life catches back up to her she will fall asleep randomly. even more so while pregnant and right after their daughter is born. she just “night night Josephine” 

Who wakes up in the middle of the night with nightmares:

they both have their fair share of horrid nightmares. Alex’s deal a lot with his trauma of growing up. his mom pulling various knives on his siblings and dad attacking them. even nightmares of jo leaving him like Izzie did and he wakes up without her. 

jo’s are terrifying as well. she dreams that Paul’s death was just an illusion and that hes still out there and he’ll still come and get her. she wakes up drenched in a cold sweat and Alex holds her and they pull up his death certificate on the gsm database to prove it. she also has nightmares about being abandoned again. dreams of herself as a baby, dreams of her mother leaving her at that firestation. horrid nightmares. and Alex just holds her. she also has many nightmares about Alex abandoning her too just like her mother abandoned her but he’s never done that he’s always there when she wakes up and everything is okay again

Who accidentally punched the other in their sleep:

jo is an absolute horrible bed partner. she does NOT sleep still. she will move around so much during sleep its dangerous. yes, Alex did wake up with a bruise across his cheek one night from an elbow to the face...

Who can’t keep their hands to themself:

both of them. theyre notorious horndogs no autocorrect they are not corndogs please stop correcting me when you’re wrong 

and just because, im throwing in the parenting meme one too bc my heart melts

packs the lunches

Alex. he gets up with the kids in the mornings and also we do not trust jo to make their children food. she’d feed them boxed Mac n cheese and take out the entirety of their lives. and while they love that and Alex wouldn’t care if it was jsut them, their kids need real food. he packs them lunchables and uncrustables but at least its a little more of a variety. 

blows raspberries while cuddling

jo, more so. they both do, but jo LOVES a good chunky baby belly she can blow raspberries onto. and yes she leaves maroon lipstick marks on chubby cheeks and bellies. 

is the tickle monster

Alex. and she runs to mommy to save her from daddy! “oh, now you want mommy, huh? as soon as daddy is the tickle monster all you want is mommy? not when I wanted cuddles, or we picked you up from daycare or I dont know, I gave birth to you and wanted snuggles you cry and want daddy but now hes the tickle monster you want me?” and jo scoops her up and tries saving her but ultimately they lose and get attacked in their very large bed by the tickle monster. 

gives life lesson speeches

they both do just depending on the situations. 

when the girls start dating, jo sits them all down separately, and explains to them a bit of her past. letting them know that no man should ever lay hands on them. she teaches them how to defend themselves and Alex ofc shows them in example how women should be treated. Alex makes it clear that if a guy or girl ever should treat his daughters or his son in any other way than he treats jo, that he needs to know and gOD forbiD one of them lay a finger on one of his children there WILL be hell to pay. jo obviously consoles him in front of her children but tells him “u already have a record. if anyone lays hands on our children I will be putting them in the ground not you”

kisses the boo-boos

Alex he is a pushover and 100% makes sure all boo-boos are kissed and even when the kids are way too old for having their boo-boos kissed, he makes sure the bandaids that are no longer avengers or dinosaur or unicorn or princess themed, have been properly kissed. even through protests of “dad, im not five anymore I dont need my bandaids kissed” “how do you expect them to heal, then, CJ? you’re my most clumsy kid, and I have had to kiss all your boo-boos and never once have I not. thats why you’re still in once piece” 

breaks the bad news

jo makes Alex do it most times. she claims she’s the fun parent and tries to stay the fun parent by making Alex break bad news like “we cannot get another dog” she blames it on Alex but then brings home a puppy the following week. 

joins the PTA

listen. LISTEN. when Greyson started big kid school, in kindergarten, they placed her in private school to give her everything they didnt have growing up. jo was determined to make sure she gave her daughter everything made sure she felt loved and was spoiled it was terrible. so jo, of course, sent her to Seattle Elementary academy and was not paying attention when she signed some forms signing up to be in the PTA. she loathed it so much and “Alex im sorry I cant do this. I know we wanted to give Gracie everything we didnt have growing up but I cant take it I cant take the private school. the volunteer hours the strict dress code violations? she is FIVE. I also have to volunteer FORTY HOURS this year alone. no! I am a surgeon, a mother of two and im pregnant! I do not have time for this! all these PTA moms are stay at home moms who have nothing better to do than gossip about their neighbors and drink wine. and I swear to god if I have to hear about Jessica’s fucking essential oils pyramid scheme one more time I will shove those oils so far up her a––” “Jo! Look, Ali, mommy’s here!” Alex interrupts her just in time. he doesnt blame her. those private school moms are quiet the handful. every time, one of them has the nerve to hit on him. “and I swear, if one more of those moms hits on you in front of me, im going to backhand her with my engagement ring on. no hate to most of them, but theyre too much” they end up ending Gracie, and Ali and the rest of the kids to public school just like they had grown up in and did just fine. 

crashes sleepovers with embarrassing stories

oh one hundred and ten percent Alexander Michael Karev. he will find any moment to break out embarrassing stories and photos. hell, even when Zola, Bailey, ellis, Sofia, Harriet, scout, any of the bunch come over he’ll embarrass them too!  

gives the crazy nicknames

not really either of them (that ive figured out in the moment) (the kkc kids do not have crazy nicknames yet) (we jsut have Gracie for Greyson, Ali for Alice, and CJ for Cristina Jo. Alexis goes by Sissy because of Alexis and Alexa and Eli usually goes by bubba seeing as how that’s what the twins have called each other growing up with Izzie and that stuck) 

thank you so much for these! I loved loved loved doing them! even threw in some KKC universe things so if yall have questions about that feel free to ask I will share! tho there is yet to have a fic out about them yet… its been a bit difficult with writers block /: 

[gvf-imagine]

Weekend with Jake

——————————

You and the boys relaxed in Jake and Josh’s basement, it was a calm saturday afternoon and most of your free time was spent with these men in this basement. They were your friends, your best friends even. Sam was the first one you met , he was in your biology class to which you both showed up late and were paired together to dissect a frog. Which you both protested, instead of cutting up a poor frog you and him talked about music the whole class hour. You failed the class but gained a friend, well four friends after he introduced you to his brother’s that lunch period. That was a few years ago now, back in freshman year. Now you're all seniors, who barely attended school. The boys at least had good reason, they were investing their time in their band. You just didn't want to go to school if your friends weren't there, you did what you needed to graduate and coasted through the rest.

“Thirsty?” Jake inquires , noticing you'd been quiet for a while. You didn't realize any of them had spoken; you were adrift in reflections of the past.

“Yeah I could go for some soda” you answer, offering him a kind smile, he grins back and hops off the black suede couch, his imprint still left in the cushion next to you. You hadn't noticed the warm presence of his body heat until it was gone. He moved across the room and jogged up the stairs headed for the kitchen.

“I'm bored” Danny utters, looking at an old magazine. He let it fall out of his grip and settle lightly on his lap.

“Me too” Sam announces, he had been situated in the corner of the room and was fiddling around with his Bass, he often played small compositions to himself. You looked to Josh who you expected would be the next to say something, he was far too enthralled with his phone to even regard that any of you were here.

Jake's footsteps descended the stairs before he hopped over the back of the couch landing perfectly in his fading imprint.

“Here you go!” he voices handing you the cold can. You grab it and inspect the label, your eyebrows peak up towards your forehead in thought.

“You got me diet?” you inquire looking to him. His face goes pale and panic fills his chocolate brown eyes. He shifts his weight on the couch, adjusting his posture. He gulps telling you his throat went dry. You tried your hardest not to laugh, but couldn't help it. It was cute seeing him all flustered at the thought of insulting you.

“Jakey, I'm just kidding, I prefer diet, thank you” the words escape your lips and Jake sighs with relief sneaking in a small chuckle as well.

“Good….because I didn't mean anything by bringing you diet, I mean I know you like it but I dont - I dont think youre ya know, I don't thi- you look really good to me like you don't have to change anything about your- I just-” you put your finger to his mouth, his haphazard words coming to a stop.

“Thank you Jake” you speak softly, you knew what he was trying to say.

“Let's go swimming” Josh proposes, finally lifting his eyes from his phone. You had almost forgotten what you were talking about.

“Swimming? We don't have a pool” Sam replies, setting his base back in its case. Josh shrugs looking at his tall, slim, younger brother.

“no , but the neighbors do and they're out of town” he offers with a sly grimace.

“Problem solved” Danny chimes perking up with a toothy grin.

“I’m in” Jake replies nodding.

“(y/n)?” Josh asks, they all look at you in waiting. Your eyes flicker between the four of them.

“Sure….but I don't have a bathing suit” you realize.

“That's ok you can just wear your birthday suit” Josh winks. Your eyes roll, as they often did in Josh's direction.

“You can borrow Ronnies,here come on I'll take you to her room” Jake offers, touching your shoulder gently indicating it was time to stand. You agree and follow him up the stairs and down the hall to her room. You walked in and it smelled just like her, vanilla and cashmere , her signature perfume scent. Jake looks around the room and silence settles in the air he looks over to you his hand tucked snugly in his back pockets.

“Here it's right here….dont worry its clean '' he says pulling the bikini out of Ronnie's drawer. You look at it as he hands it to you , it was the color of strawberry milk, which you liked, it was also a two piece, which you didn't like.

“Oh it's a bikini” you utter, you didn't mean to say it out loud. You did not usually wear bikinis , you didn't feel very comfortable in them, especially not in front of four boys. You just didn't feel like you had the right body for a bikini. Jake must have noticed your unease

“You can wear one of my shirts if you're not comfortable in just that” he offers gently. You smile and thank him but decline, you didn't want his clothes to get ruined from the chlorine.

“Ill just wear this, its no problem, plus I really wanna go swimming its hot as fuck out” you chuckle. Jake nods in agreement

“Well I'd better go change too” he announces, leaving you alone in the room. You slip your clothes off and shuffle into the bikini. You looked at yourself in the mirror that hung on the back of Ronnie's door. You didn't look as horrible as you thought you would have, but you were still kind of nervous about the guys seeing you like this, they'd never seen you in such a small amount of clothing.

“Most of your body will be underwater, they'll only see you for a moment” you give yourself a small pep talk.

“Come on (y/n) were leaving!” you hear danny call from the living room. With a fortifying breath you give yourself one last look and walk out of the room. You make a pit stop in the bathroom and grab a towel to wrap around your body , you grabbed an extra four for the guys as well. The soft shag carpeting of the bath mat in the bathroom grounded you and calmed you.

“Just getting some towels!” you yell down assuming they heard you. You had the towels and you were ready to go, butterflies slammed incessantly into the sides of your stomach, begging to be released.

You walked down the stairs and found the guys waiting by the front door.

“Alright let's go” Josh says as he turns the bronze door knob, the sun gleamed in the sky, you squinted trying to combat its powerful rays.

“Jesus christ” Sam spat holding his hand up above his eyes.

“Good day for swimming,” Danny adds as you all walked towards the backyard, the neighbor in question was a few houses down. The warm soft grass felt inviting on the bottoms of your feet the sun bathed your skin with warmth like a hug from mother nature herself.

The pool was actually pretty big, you were almost surprised something like this was in someone's backyard and not on an episode of ‘cribs’. The boys begin pulling their shirts off with no thought , you were almost jealous at how little they had to worry about their bodies. You, on the other hand, were a little more reluctant. A few droplets of water hit your face as Jake jumps in the pool, then Danny then sam.

“Come on” Josh nudges you before joining his brothers. You watch them with a smile before dropping your towel , slowly. Jake was watching you intently only with his head visible above water. His lips part and his tongue smooths across them as he takes in the sight of you. His hair was wet and small drops of water cascaded down his face, he didn't seem to notice he was too engaged with you. You didn't see him looking at you at first and the first person to say anything was danny.

“Jesus…” he muttered, in a good way you had hoped.

“I'll take that as a compliment Daniel” you chime walking closer to the pool, using the ladder to slowly dip yourself in the refreshing water. It wasn't too cold or too hot, it was perfect and your body thanked you for it.

The guys swam around for a while, all of you splashing each other, laughing and probably being far too loud to go unnoticed by the other neighbors but none of you cared. It was freeing to be in the water, all your worries fade with every splash , ebb and flow just like the artificial waves Josh and Sammy were causing while wrestling in the water. You felt something grab your leg and pull you under before you could let out a sound. You smile when you see Jake's long hair floating aimlessly in the clear blue water, he waves to you then brings his hand to his lips and blows you a kiss before resurfacing. You stayed under a few seconds longer than followed him up. The noise of the outside world filling your ears once again. Jake flipped his hair out of his face, you watched in slow motion as droplets of water flung of the tips. You couldn’t help but take not of how attractive Jake is, his smooth sun kissed skin covered in droplets of water racing down his body

Stop stop stop.

You pull your eyes away from him , you could swear you saw him smile.

Your heart was fluttering in your chest, you hadn’t felt like this before about Jake, you’ve always seen him as a best friend. The night went on and now you and Jake found yourselves back at his house , upstairs on the balcony that was attached to his second floor bedroom.

“You want a drink?” He questions

“Wine?” You inquire with a smile.

“Yes ma’am, your favorite too, pink moscato” he returns the smile. You were at the kiszkas so often for dinner they’d always kept a bottle of your favorite wine in their liquor cabinet. Jake stepped out of his room and downstairs. You turned your attention to the sky. Pinks and oranges painted across the lazy sky as the sun began to set. You closed your eyes, your body tired from spending the day in the hot sun. The clinking of glasses brings you back to a more present state of mind. Your eyes flicker up to Jake who stood over you, holding a wine glass out to you , once you took it he returned to the wooden patio chair he was sitting on.

He poured your drink first and then his, the wind gently blowing his hair. You took a sip of the sweet and tart liquid, it was ice cold and delicious.

Your eyes find their way back to the sky.

“What a beautiful view” you chime to no one in particular. Jake looks to you, he watches the wind sweep through your hair , his eyes scan your profile lingering on your lips.

“Yeah...you’re gorgeous” he says , his words softly float out of his mouth.

“I means ITS- it’s a gorgeous...view” he corrects himself quickly, he curses himself under his breath. You pretend like you didn’t hear the first part but you did and it made your stomach flip. Did he really think you’re gorgeous?

“Are you sleeping over?” He asks, taking another drink from his glass. You mull the idea over in your head.

“Do you want me to?” You respond , a loaded question.

Jake catches this and smiles at you.

“Of course” he coos. This would not be the first time you slept over so it wasn’t a big deal.

The rest of the guys were downstairs drinking around the fire pit, you could see them from where you were sitting.

“Wanna join them?” Jake asks, noticing you gazing down at them.

“Sure!” You chime. The two of you grab your drinks and make your way to the fire pit.

“We should make s’mores” you propose making a pit stop in the kitchen. You open the cupboards looking for graham crackers and some chocolate bars. Marshmallows were on top of the fridge as always.

“Here I can carry that” Jake offers, taking the food from your hands , such a gentleman. His fingertips gently brush against yours and by the look in his sparkling eyes you couldn’t help but wonder if it was intentional.

“There they are,” Josh exclaims as you and Jake sat down. You sat next to Danny who welcomed you with a side hug and a kind smile. Jake sat across from you with Sammy. Flames of blazing heat separating the two of you, obstructing your view of him.

“We brought snacks” Jake chimes tossing the marshmallows to Sam who tore the bag open happily.

Conversation flowed as easily as the drinks, the sun was gone now, the heat of the alcohol was all you needed to keep you warm. The five of you spent a few hours around that fire landing you all in a drunken stooper.

“Well...I think I’m gonna go to bed ladies” you say, struggling to stand up. Danny holds your arm stabilizing you. You turn and give him a good night hug, his hand brushes up and down your back as he says goodnight. You take a lap hugging each of them , all of them saying goodnight. You stumble again as you walk towards the house.

“I’ll help her” Jake says standing to his feet, you feel his hand lay above your hip bone and his other hand grab your arm as he stands behind you holding you up.

“Went a little heavy on the wine huh girl?” He laughs as he moves you through the house.

“Yeah” you slur.

“Think you can make it up the stairs?” He asks, trying to catch your gaze. You shrug. He chuckles and just picks you up bridal style , carrying you gracefully up the stairs. He sets you down on his bed gently, his mattress shapes to your body , you feel him drape a thick comforter over you , his body weight settling next to you. He brushes your hair out of your face and kisses you softly, reluctantly on the cheek. It felt right, being here with him in this bed , with his arms wrapped around you , your body against his, his face nuzzled into your neck planting kisses on your shoulder. He whispers a soft goodnight.

The next morning you woke up to an empty bed, it took you a moment to realize where you were, your head pounded , the night before still knocking against your brain.

Jake was nowhere to be found , well, at least in the bedroom. You squint your eyes as the sun gleamed through the blinds

“Good morning” Jake voices as he steps into the room carrying a tray with breakfast foods laid out attractively.

“I brought you breakfast, I bet you’re feeling pretty rough” he chuckles as he sets the tray down so it’s stationed across your lap. You smile at the plate of delicious food in front of you and then turn to Jake.

“Oh Jake this is so sweet, thank you so much”

“You’re welcome girl….I made it all myself” he adds.

“Well here we can share” you chime scooting over so he could get closer, he wasted no time doing so.

You rest your head on his chest as he takes a drink of juice.

It all felt right, for the first time in your life everything felt right.

[sanababes]

Requested by: anon

Mine

Pairings: fem!reader x Choi Sooyoung / Joy

Warnings: nothing much, just some (not really) mafia au scenario

/ it's my first writing about this so yeah, please bear with it and I couldn't really stick to the plot hehe /

-----------

Park Sooyoung, the youngest underground mafia boss in Seoul had been keeping her eyes on a one specific woman. But due to the conflicts in her schedule, she couldn't have time to arrange a proper meeting with you, Kang Y/n. She also has a small knowledge about you that makes her more excited to meet you personally.

Meanwhile, you're the daughter of Kang Seungwoo (just a random name lol) who is one of the prestigious individuals when it comes to political status. The Kang family haven't been involved in unnecessary rumors or news, in other words they are strict and timid with their actions. You really didn't care about it and you despise people who show their interest on you for their own sake or for money.

Your cold and ignorant attitude had been your own bestfriend when interacting with people which you hate the most. When your family is invited in an event, you would keep a reserved aura. Luckily, your cousin Hyewon is there to accompany you for the whole time.

Today is a rather interesting day since it's your 21st year of living in this unwholesome world.

You were awoken by Miss Choi, your beloved nanny since you came out of your mother's womb. The older tapped your shoulder gently that made you slur inaudible sounds.

"Goodmorning, young master. It's already 1 o'clock in the afternoon. Your father is expecting you in the dining room as fast as possible"

(Bruh does that even make sense lol, morning then noon i-)

After a few seconds of adjusting your sight into the bright lighting, you opened your eyes then brushed your hand through your ruffled hair. Miss Choi prepared a warm bath for you to freshen up and start your special day. You got up up from your bed slowly then entered the bathroom sluggishly. You removed the pieces of clothing on your body then dipped yourself into the water. A sigh escaped from your lips as you closed your eyes from the tranquilizing feeling sipping through your skin.

It took you roughly 20 minutes to get yourself dry and dressed up casually. You strutted gracefully downstairs and saw your parents chatting as they ate lunch peacefully.

"Hi darling, happy birthday to you!" Your mother hugged you tightly then gave a kiss on your cheek.

"Thanks mom" you smiled lightly.

"Happy birthday, Y/n" your father greeted.

You thanked him then joined them for lunch. They talked about business things and you would occasionally answer their questions, stuffs like that.

When you're all done, they left immediately for a quick meeting at the city hall with 2 bodyguards guiding them to a black Mercedes.

You looked around your spacious living room and decided to call your bestfriend Yujin to come over. The latter agreed quickly and was on the way already.

You sat comfortably against the classy couch and waited for Yujin to arrive. You fished out your phone then scrolled through Insta then you saw Sooyoung's recent post.

"Hmm, she's cute..." you mumbled nonchalantly.

"Who's cute, Y/n/n?"

You flinched and almost fell when you saw Yujin peeking behind your shoulder.

"Bitch! When did you even got here?" You asked.

"I just came in a minute ago. Miss Choi had let me in" the latter smiled cheekily.

"You almost gave me a heart attack..." you grumbled while putting your hand over your chest.

"I'm sorry, so who's cute?" Yujin sat beside you and waited for your answer.

"Uhh, no one" you managed to say.

The girl looked at you suspiciously then glanced at your phone.

"Ahh I see, so Park Sooyoung aka Joy is your type now huh?" She teased while nudging your shoulder.

A blush crept into your cheeks as you tried to deny what your bestfriend said.

"What? I don't know what you're talking about" you pressed the home button of your phone nervously.

"Yeah yeah, don't worry I won't tell anyone"

Yujin looked at you, trying not to laugh at your priceless reaction. You just shook your head and grabbed the remote of the TV.

"Oh! Happy birthday you jerk" she added.

"Yeah, I thought you wouldn't remember" you said sarcastically.

"Oh come on, how can I forget my baby's bday" she pinched your cheeks while making some cringy noise.

You whined and tried to pry her hands off.

"Yah! if you don't put your hands down imma kill you" you threatened.

"Fine, fine. So why did you called me over? Your party will not start until the sun sets though"

'Oh right, the party yey...'

"Ughh, I dont want to goooo" you complained like child.

"Duh of course you need to go, it's your own celebration for fuck sake" Yujin stated with an 'as a matter of fact' tone.

Your parents prepared a party for your special day. Many influential people are invited and Sooyoung was one of them. You had seen her before from fashion events that was held by her own company.

She was pretty popular and has been known as an independent woman. You also by the way, is interested to know her more which is quite rare.

"What are you going to wear Y/n?" Yujin suddenly asked.

"Uh just some suit that I bought recently"

You weren't a fan of girly stuffs so yeah, you're wearing suits frequently.

"Hmm, what should I wear then?" The latter said while scratching her not so itchy chin.

"Just say that you want to borrow my clothes again" you chuckled as you smacked Yujin's head playfully.

"Oh man, how did you know?"

You just snickered at her antics .

"I know you so well Yujin-ah" the latter started to pout like a child.

"Shall we get ready early instead? I'm bored" you yawned wearily.

Yujin agreed as you both walked upstairs towards your room.

---- time skip ----

You're currently sipping a vintage Vinfolio wine as Hyewon and Yujin kept blabbering between you. Your parents in the other hand, are talking with some acquaintance from what you can see in your peripheral vision.

Meanwhile, Sooyoung has been glancing at you from time to time with some of her 'secretly' mafia members chatting beside her. The gorgeous woman decided to muster up her courage and strutted towards your table. You noticed her in a short red-sparkled dress which hugged her toned body perfectly. She had confident smile on her lips, determined to make you fall for her.

"Good evening Y/n-ssi, I've been wanting to meet you for a long time" Sooyoung greeted and lend her hand out for a hand shake.

"It goes the same for me, Joy-ssi" you showed your signature smile and held her hand gently.

"Wanna talk somewhere else? It's pretty crowded in here..." the latter suggested as you shared a meaningful look with Hyewon and Yujin which they understood quickly.

"Yeah, sure" you nodded and guided Sooyoung to the nearest balcony within the ginormous event hall.

"So I heard you're planning to collab with the Kim's corporation next month"

"Hmm, we're still discussing about the terms of the company so it's not sure yet" you answered politely.

"I didn't know that Sangwoo is your father" Sooyoung stated while staring at your side profile.

You looked out into the distance and agreed timidly. The latter bit her lips then went closer to you.

"You know what, can we hangout sometimes when you're free?"

You chuckled lightly while swirling your wine glass in a circular motion.

"Are you trying to hit on me Miss Park?" Sooyoung smirked while dragging along your shoulder.

"I mean who wouldn't with someone attractive like you?" She flirted casually.

"Fine, meet me on Friday at Han River park. 6pm sharp Missy" you said while glancing at her.

Sooyoung smiled victoriously and kissed your cheek.

"I'll make you mine soon Y/n, mine..."

~the end~

I didn't sticked to prompt too much, sarry

[voidselfshipp]

Starstruck

Cw: food

As jer laid peacefully under all those warm blankets raindrop wrote a letter and tied it to a lantern.

It floated up to the Sky,surpassing the clouds and into the spirit world, getting tangled in an old tree.

-- she tu!, look!-- yu lei said, using his throwing star to scratch the rock tangled between the trees roots, making it move its branches.

He took the card-- Its from rain!

Yu lei Walked inside as his brother sets the two cups of tea and freshly baked cookies on the table.

--"dearest yu lei and shen tu"-- he read-- "I really miss you! Come visit soon! I have a friend to present to you!,I think youll like her! -rain".

Both brothers look at eachother as both sit on the table.

-- do you think thats a good idea?--shen tu asked.

-- yes of course!,maybe rain can convince her friend to put our posters on her home!

His brother chuckled-- still with that door god thing? We have the restaurant now, hey who knows maybe we can get ya a girlfriend!

Yu lei shook his head laughing-- oh shut up

The Next day arrived without much fuss.

Both Guardian brothers went to visit their friend, and just around twelve pm rains friend had arrived.

The store was empty aside from some costumers aside.

Jerico stepped in Yawning a bit as she had woken up just some minutes ago.

--aight rain im here!

Rain Walked up to her-- jerico! I knew youd come! These are my Friends, shen tu and yu lei!

Freezing was an understatement as to what jer did.

She looked up to meet none other than her not-so-fictional-now crush and his brother.

"Well fuck me" she thought looking at both-- ah....nice to meet you

Yu lei couldnt respond either,jerico was beautiful, and there he was trying to find the right words.

She sat by the Window as rain tried to introduce eachother to the other.

--Jerico is an artist you know!--raindrop said to the brothers-- shes here for a job! A Long term one!,And shes super skilled!

--aw-- jer cooed-- thats very sweet of you rain!

She nodded tugging shen tus sleeve, leaving yu lei and jerico alone to talk.

Inside jeris brain there was only chaos,there infront of her was the Man who she saw on a movie, A MOVIE, a Man who WASNT SUPPOSED TO EXIST.

Was she startstruck? Confused? Feeling a sudden urge to launch herself at him and kiss him? Yeah.

-- so youre New-- yu lei said--was the trip long?

-- yeah it was-- she answered-- but coming here was worth it, the place is very beautiful..

He nodded looking outside just like her-- yesterday was rainy, And today its sunny,the Weather god must be in a mood

She chuckled-- yeah they must be, you know I heard a story about gods yesterday-- jerico felt like messing with yu lei a bit-- about the little door gods,and would you guess that one of them looks and its called just like you?

Yu lei panics as he looks at his brother who facepalms and rain chuckling--ah what a coincidence

Jer leaned in-- to quote one of my favourite movies, just like I, god doesnt play with dice, and I dont Belive in coincidences-- that made him sweat bullets, she laughed playfully pushing him-- im just messing with ya

He chuckles-- maybe I am who knows-- he winks and just then, ying, rains mother calls him to help with the food

-- ill see you in a bit

-- see ya

He nodds with a smile and goes help with the soup.

Jerico is a nervous wreck and she tries to process everything, he was way prettier in person.

She sighed, it was seen that he rejected every single woman that the movie tried to make as his love interest.

Why would she be any different?

Yu lei brought her her soup, she Ate alone as the shop started to fill up with costumers.

Jerico decided to stay after hours to help clean, so did the brothers.

As she cleaned the bowls, thinking she was alone and nobody could hear her, she sang.

-- 'Boy, you got me helpless

Look into your eyes, and the sky's the limit

I'm helpless

Down for the count, and I'm drownin' in 'em'

-- she rocked back and forth with a smile on her face--

'I have never been the type to try and grab the spotlight

We were at a revel with some rebels on a hot night

Laughin' at my sister as she's dazzling the room

Then you walked in and my heart went, "Boom!" ' --

She wasnt EXACTLY the quiet type, yu lei peeked his head through the door hiding behind the one with his poster on it.

Why did the song feel familiar, or more so, how did he know the meaning it had to her

--' Tryin' to catch your eye from the side of the ballroom

Everybody's dancin' and the band's top volume

Grind to the rhythm as we wine and dine

Grab my sister and whisper

"Yo, this one's mine"

My sister made her way across the room to you

And I got nervous thinking

"What's she gonna do?"

She grabs you by the arm

I'm thinkin', "I'm through"

Then you look back at me

And suddenly I'm helpless

Oh, look at those eyes

And the sky's the limit

I'm helpless !'--

Jer stops midway through as raindrop starts to clap.

-- you have such a nice voice! -- she said putting the clean dishes on the shelves.

--Thank you for helping-- ying said as jerico dried her hands thanking raindrop for the compliment and walking over to Grab her bag.

-- its nothing, glad I could help!

-- before you go!-- rain handed her two posters-- so they can visit you!

--Thanks rain, youre too kind -- jeri ruffled her hair--ill be back tomorrow!

She Walked outside to be met by yu lei, as shen tu seemed too busy cleaning-- can I walk you home?-- he asked-- its dark and I want to make sure youll be fine

-- I dont want to bother ill be fine

--nonsense! I couldnt bear if something happened to you!--the door god stopped mid sentence-- b because rain would be very upset! Let me walk you home

She chuckled-- alright, come on

They walk silently as the breeze made jerico shiver.

Yu lei, handed her his jacket, as rain and her mom encouraged him and his brother to dress with modern clothes, to blend in.

He smiled as jer put the jacket on and he pulled her closer to him.

When they arrived home she puts the posters up on her Doors-- its late, you sure you dont want to spend the night here?

Yu lei shook his head-- ill be fine, you can give me the jacket tomorrow dont worry

She nodds and both say goodbye.

Jeri sits on the floor back against the door, sighing,what a day!.

She went to sleep gripping his jacket tightly, it had his smell.

Oh she wished and hoped that hed pay attention to her

[hadestownmodern]

dont have sex u will get pregnant and get made fun of by persephone

Hi guys! @dilforpheus here! I want to preface that the first segment of this was written before the banter on Instagram, but once I saw it I had to incorporate it. There is one final segment with WAY too many spoilers to share yet! 

This friendship/semi maternal relationship between Eurydice and Persephone is arguably my favorite in the ENTIRE modern au. 

The exams were passed back with no particular ceremony. Just Persephone turning them over on Student’s desks, curling writing on the front projecting a number as to how well a student did. Eurydice wasn’t particularly paying attention. She didn’t sleep much the night before and her back was absolutely killing her. She wasn’t even sure how she was going to make it through the next fifty-seven minutes of Persephone lecturing her on social structure in some specific midwestern town and the obscure sociological study that was performed on middle schoolers in the region. 

Eurydice barely notices when Persephone puts her returned exam in front of her, and most certainly misses the smirk on her features as she hands back the papers. Eurydice flips it over to see her grade- 87, adequate- before flipping through the exam to see what she missed. She notices that one corner is bumpier than the other, and flips to see what is interrupting the pages. 

There, staples to the corner of her exam, is a single condom. Not much use now that there is a staple through the middle. In persephone’s swirling cursive is written  

“You, like the girls in this study, could benefit from these -Seph”

Dumbfounded, Eurydice looked up to see Persephone smirking at her as she returned to her laptop in the front of the room .

“Are you fucking with me, Stephanie?” Eurydice mumbled, turning the paper to look at Persephone. “Jokes on you, i’m allergic to latex.” She quips, disregarding the fact she was fully in class in front of people she didn’t know. Fuck ‘em, she’d never see them again after this semester anyway. Persephone was going to be in her life forever. 

“Excellent point. I’ll remember that for next time.”

They ignore the gaping looks of her classmates, and the murmured whispers as Persephone goes back to teaching and beginning the new unit. 

“What did she just call her?” “Did she lowkey call Eurydice a whore?”  

It’s halfway through class, not even a full 30 minutes into the lecture when Eurydice is grasping the edge of the desk so tightly her knuckles were white. Her breathing is labored, but only enough that a trained eye would see. She isn’t even taking notes as Persephone tosses a keyring at her. “Get out of here, you look like shit.”

Persephone is erasing the board before Eurydice can process it, grasping the key ring in her fingers. 

“No, i’m staying. I have to learn this eventually before you give me an 87 again”  

Persephone rolls her eyes before shutting her laptop. “Fine. Class is over.” 

Noone else in the class argues as they quickly pack up their things and scramble out of the classroom, short “bye” and “have a good weekends” pour out of their mouths as Persephone watches them go. She sits at the now empty desk beside Eurydice and runs a hand over her hair. “Is it your back again… Orpheus told me it’s been bothering you recently.”

Eurydice only nods, letting out a shaky breath. ‘You didn’t need to end class-”

“Well you weren’t leaving, and you were distracting me. I was afraid you were gonna pass out right here.”

Eurydice laughs half heartedly, and starts to put her stuff in her bag. “Thank you, Perstephanie.”

Persephone put an arm around her shoulder and rubbed her shoulder. “You know, if you used a condom, you wouldn’t be having this problem.”

---------------------------------------------------------------------------

“Are you fucking serious right now?” Eurydice pulled out the tissue paper, pulling a single box of condoms out. Attached was a note, in Persephone’s flourished cursive.

“So next birthday you don’t have to be pregnant -Seph. P.s. the real present is a vacation where you can put these into use. “

“I’m just saying, twenty two is way more fun when you don’t have feet you can’t see.” Persephone is on the other side of the bar, pouring herself an extra drink to toast to Eurydice, where she herself could not. “We could be drinking on the beach, but no, you drank two glasses of wine at my house and ended up in bed with my nephew.”

“Oh fuck off, You set me up for that-”

“EuRyDiCe! PeRsEpHonE!” Orpheus’ voice cracks from the other end of the bar at the same time a shot glass slips from his fingers and shatters on the ground. “What...whats going on? Why are you fighting?” 

His hazel eyes are wide as they flick between the two most important women in his life who are seemingly arguing over..a gift? Their impending child? “I thought you liked each other!”

Eurydice reached out and grabbed his hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze. “We do, Orpheus. We’re just messing around.”

“We do this in class all the time!” Persephone promised, squeezing his shoulder. “And you clearly didn’t listen when I taught you what safe sex was all those years ago. Maybe it’ll get through to her.”

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

There’s a gentle knock on the door that startles Eurydice, who pulls her eyes away from her daughter. A couple of hours old and she already seemed to shift the tilt of her world’s axis. She’s finally showered and in something comfortable when Orpheus stepped out to grab something to eat- namely, bring her fries from that diner down the street. She deserved it, dammit.  Eurydice looks up to see Persephone in the doorway, waving and smiling brightly.

“Hey sunshine, can I come in?” Persephone peaks in, genuine joy on her face as she watched Eurydice. So young, but in the short time she’s known her, she’s seen her grow into a completely different woman. “Everyone else will be here soon..Junie’s with my mom..but I wanted to see you.” Yes, she was overjoyed to see this baby that belonged to the boy she raised, but her priority was currently on the woman holding her. She wasn’t about to let her get overlooked in all the excitement of the baby. 

“Yeah, Yeah of course… I’m trying to get the hang of feeding her, but then she fell asleep. And they keep telling me to sleep when she does. But I can’t seem to stop looking at her…”

Persephone sat on the end of the bed, near Eurydice but not daring to crowd her personal space. “No, no I understand completely. I didn’t even put Junie down for about two weeks. Wouldn’t even let my mama hold her..” She rests her hand on Eurydice’s knee with a smile. “So a girl, huh? Does she have a name yet?

“Don’t act like you didn’t know.” Eurydice teased, running her finger over the baby’s nose with a lazy smile. “Your mother knows everything. But yes. I can’t believe it. I love her so much already, and I’ve barely known her three hours...we can’t name her. Nothing seems good enough..I’ve called her french fry for months now.”

“Even you’re starting to believe in her magic. That’s impressive. And a name will come to you. Well, My mother named Junie. No way in hell did my husband pick the name Juniper.”  Persephone watched the way Eurydice didn’t even look at her, unable to drag her eyes away from the tiny person she held in the crook of her arm. “How are you, honey. And don’t give me that fine, bullshit.”

“i...I’m so happy. I love her so much and I love Orpheus so much and- i’m so tired.” Eurydice admits, letting out a sigh. “I love her so much, and I can’t even describe how happy I am. But i’m tired and I didn’t realize how much pain i’d still be in.. and it’s like her gums are razor blades and I don’t think i’m every going to physically be capable of having sex again, not to mention why would Orpheus even want to and- I’m so tired but I can’t look away from her! I can’t put her down. She’s been apart of me for so long.”  She’s crying before she realizes it, warm tears running down her face. She hiccups as she feels the baby starting to move in her arms and almost cries harder. How was she supposed to do this if she was already exhausted?

Persephone is closer to her, tucking black curls behind her ear before wiping at her cheeks. “It’s okay, Eurydice, it’s okay. I understand. I really do. I felt guilty for being tired, for not being on top of the game all the time. I worked so hard to have her, how dare I be anything less than 100%.” She pulled her head to her chest, stroking Eurydice’s soft curls as she held her. Eurydice needed a mother, she needed a mother to care about her, and Persephone was more than glad to fill her part. “”I would take showers that were exactly three minutes long. And for 180 seconds I would sob. Because how dare I be anything less that grateful. But fuck, I just wanted a nap for more than two hours at a time. And to not feel like a cow. So I get it.” 

Persephone kisses the top of Eurydice’s head, feeling the girl’s body just shake as she cried into her. Of course she kept it in. Women were trained to think they could show nothing but joy that day, when in reality the emotional highs and lows came like the changing tide. “It’s okay. You’re going to be the best mom. You are allowed to feel things, Eurydice” She promises, allowing herself a glance down at the incredibly small little girl Eurydice was clutching as if her life depended on it. “She’s so beautiful already. Looks just like you…”

“She looks like a potato alien, you can say it!” Eurydice whined, hiding her face in Persephone’s shoulder. 

“Well..all babies do. But you ate so many fries what do you expect other than a potato?” It’s teasing, and light, and the way Perspehone lightens the mood. She won’t dare ask to hold the baby, not with the way Eurydice anchors herself by holding her. 

“I feel like I got punched in the stomach with at least six knives and then someone ripped out whatever balances my emotions. All that while feeling like a dairy cow mixed with the happiest person in the world.” Eurydice tries to describe, laughing just a little as she wiped her tears away. “I’m a mess.”

“Well, you know, all of that could have been prevented with a condom. Which, by the way-” She pulled out a card and handed it to her. “Heres one for safekeeping, remember it in six weeks.”

“You’re such an asshole sometimes.”

“I know.”

[faunusrights]

OFFAL HUNT REMASTERED LIVEBLOG // CHAPTER 19

IN THIS EPISODE OF MURPHY IS SCREAMING, CONSTANTLY, TRAPPED IN THEIR PERFECT NIGHTMARE:

Glynda was saying: “I know we aren’t friends. I know we aren’t partners. I know you’re a criminal. But—I think I can trust you. I think I have to trust you, even if you’ve done awful things before.”

EVERYTHING GOES WRONG BUT LIKE SOMEHOW WORSE THAN EVER? LIKE A WHOLE NEW BRAND OF LOW. LIKE CINDER’S GOT A PICKAXE AND THE CENTRE OF THE PLANET CALLS FOR AID.

IT’S BEEN A WHILE HUH!!!!!!!!!!!!!! but dw offal hunt, like the rising of the sun, the arrival of winter, and the eventual downfall of capitalism, always returns. so lets go.

(i just quickly reread chapter 18 liveblog to remember what happened and Ah Yes I Remember Now. The Suppressed Memories)

The place was emptier without Glynda. Quieter.

/gunshot oh we’re in danger right out of the gate huh? we got some yearning right out here? right now? how quickly the turn do tables.

Cinder appraised her work, holding the beige coat up to the light and squinting.

man i forgot. i FORGET. how much i just love cinder in this fic. sometimes she kinda zones to the back of my mind where she sits waiting for me to start thinking about her again, but now i remember that this cinder is Peaque. look at her GO, minding her own BUSINESS. im proud of her. does she know i love her.

It didn’t take long to don her new, fire-proofed clothes.

in another world, in a more comical plot, she used asbestos. it didnt go well.

The subtle warmth of the Dust teased tension from Cinder’s stiff muscles, even as she marvelled at the strangeness of her own bedroom’s space. It seemed bigger now than it had the last two nights.

h

She chose not to dwell on it.

h

i choose to dwell on it! ME!!!! I CHOOSE TO DWELL ON IT. HEY CINDER WHAT THIS GAY SHIT. hello. ma’am. can we look deeper into this. i, for one, would like to, and i, for one, think its of value to think abt this. that said, small segue

Quietly, Cinder murmured, “I didn’t freak out.”

THE FACT SHE SAYS IT ALOUD LIKE EM AND MERC CAN HEEEEEEAR HEEEEEEEER i am. INFATUATED with this family. cant wait for the 100k spinoff thats basically an elongated beach episode where they go to like. alton towers. or butlins. six flags??? thats a thing in america right??? anyway. beach episode. call me. (wink wink nudge nudge push push shove shove)

 We had to stop back in because Merc left his favorite binder, and it was 2 in the morning, so it was easier to crash here for the night than mess with the ship’s autopilot.

them,,, THEM!!!! mercury is just a son and childe. thast it. he canot change this. i love these kids so much i am SHAKING THE MONITOR RN!!!!!!! AAAAAAAAA

Stuck here in one of the homes they’d shared, Cinder missed them terribly. Missed the sound of their voices and the easy comfort of their presence. Finding the time to contact them had been difficult, between managing Glynda and Hati both, but Glynda was gone, and she’d sent Hati onwards to Atlas. She remembered her call with Emerald, before arriving in Umbraroot; she knew it had not soothed her or her fears.

im sorry was this chapter targeted at me, specifically, as a human being on planet earth? GOD!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I LOVE THIS FAMILY!!!!!!!!! THIS WONKY OLD BANDAGED UP FAMILY UNIT!!!!!!!!!!!!! i thrive every time they are mentioned on the page. it is a blessing. my succulents grow stronger each time they show up.

“No,” Cinder argued softly, “I had to. Mercury, you deserve to hear it from me as well. I am sorry. And I am promising you: I’ll come back.”

For a long, heart-wrenching moment, he was completely quiet. It was good that Cinder was alone in the apartment; laying herself bare like this would be unbearable with an audience.

GODDDDDDDDDDD AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

i am OBSESSED WITH THIS!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! IM GOING TO BE THINKING ABOUT THIS UNTIL I D I E. of all thing the remaster does better than og, this is just. SPEEDING AHEAD. this whole CONFLICT this whole MESS just makes everything so much RICHER its like when u splash some wine in yr fancy food or stick some cinnamon on yr favourite desserts u dont NEED TO but it adds that lil SOMETHING,,, that little KICK that just ties the flavour profile together and in this case ofgughugguhu it just GIVES SO MUCH. im making SNOW ANGELS in the WORDS on the PAGE.

“Mercury. If I could prove it to you, I would. But you have to—trust me. For just a while longer.”

“It’s getting harder,” he said. He didn’t sound like he was lying just to hurt her. That wasn’t spite. That was honest anger. And it made her feel like dirt.

im less picking these for specific instances of like, things i want to say, but more just because bits of this r rly just so /chef kiss. cinder has these.... endearingly (take that whichever way u like) human qualities in OG to rly make u realise she had ties to add to her #Doubt but the remaster is just AMPING it up and u FEEL IT and ive never been more SYMPATHETIC to a round-faced sinnamon bun of assholery and fire id DIE for cinder fall and this is a fact PUT IT ON MY GRAVESTONE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

“Is there anything you need?” What was this? Cinder could barely focus on her words. It felt like... “Anything? At all?”

“We’re fine.”

“Mercury, wait please—” She was losing him. “I think—”

“Just hurry up.”

The line went dead.

this place is not a place of honor.................. no highly esteemed deed is commemorated here........................ nothing valued is here................ IM DYING

Cinder began to type out her response, and that was when the nausea really kicked in. 

[...] 

She recognized this now.

Glynda.

stress stress stress stress STRESSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

There shouldn’t be anybody. Cinder had done everything in her power to cut Glynda from people who would interfere. To isolate her. Make it easier to bring her to Atlas, to the frozen north, to her mother and the machine…

Cinder’s esophagus quivered; furiously, she shut her eyes and thought of nothing.

god cinder don’t remind me that you’re an asshole and dipshit and also a moron im trying to be NICE and CARE ABT YOU!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! STOP REMINDING ME YOU’RE A PIECE OF SHIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

FOR FIVE MINUTES!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

The front door clicked open.

Cinder couldn’t have said how much time had passed, only that it had passed slowly. What she did know was that it was Glynda returning, the sensation of boils bursting wafting off her soul. It crawled over Cinder’s flesh. She curled in on herself.

There were mites under every nailbed. Salt in her weeping mouth.

offal hunt’s brilliant use of this horror aspect is something i have tried previously to emulate and here’s a fact, take it from me: that shit is HARD. offal hunt consistently able to whack those real nasty, really Disgusting vibes on the head EVERY TIME is a work of art. i mean, kc and diesel do not fuck around, and therefore i am NOT surprised, but it’s only when u try this shit yourself that you realise: this is hard! this is difficult! it’s a huge testament to how GOOD this fic is in every way. also this whole fucking body horror aspect is something i didnt know this fic needed, but it did, and here we are. 

Thickly: “Things were going okay. If you hadn’t gotten nasty, I might have smoothed things over. I could have fixed things with my son.”

with my son

with my son

with my son

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA I CANT TAKE IT EVERY TIME ITS TOO MUCH FOR TO BEAR I CANNOT HANDLE IT I CANNOT STAND IT ITS LIKE BEING SHOT JUST DIRECTLY IN MY DICK

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

im like sweating rn

Glynda said, “I’m scared.”

“Why?”

“I don’t want to tell you.”

I SAID IM SWEATING

Glynda asked, “Are you lying to me?”

And Cinder said, “What?”

“About me. About Witches. About Ozpin—” Cinder’s guts went sour. “—About anything. I need to know if I can trust you.”

I SAID I! AM! S W E A T I N G

“I know you’ve lied to people. Hurt people.”

Adrenaline and the image of her kids’ faces behind her eyes made a potent, sick cocktail. “—Not. Now.”

so lets like double back to when i said hey was this chapter written to target me specifically and as it turns out, yes. yes it was. yes it was and as MUCH AS I AM LIVING FOR THIS MOMENT THIS SWEET BUILDUP THE EXPLOSION AND THE CRATER IT ALL LEAVES BEHIND

I

AM

so this next bit is like. i cant really quote one section but as i was saying in Vague DMs, this whole bit feels like wading through mud. usually if you say something consumes energy to Read it’s in a Bad Way when yr bored but this is more like. you Feel cinder all over everything feels so sluggish and it’s like dragging your own corpse around as you try and leave and you’re TIRED and your LEGS HURT and you’re kinda thinking god what if i just fell face down for just a moment of my LIFE.

The putrid weight of Glynda’s soul filled the room until there was no space left for her.

it’s like being trapped in a sauna, like getting stuck in a humid waiting room. where do you GO. what do you DO. god this whole section is fantastic and offal hunt NEVER fails to fucking nail the Vibes but reading it is HARD. i literally keep having to stop and breathe like ive been holding my breath. jesus h christ.

a small intermission for a mood:

“Get fucked.”

back to regularly scheduled hell

Out of the bedroom. Down the hall. The walls were sweating with heat. She tasted smoke. 

i love that i just said how i feel like im trapped in a sauna and it turns out: thats because me and cinder both, baybee!!!! hahahaha help

Glynda’s soul chewed her to the marrow. “Move, Glynda.” 

cinder being hunted at the start of this fic: teehee! im running away! now im gonna getcha! heehee! arent i clever :) cinder being hunted now: this uh. this blows, actually,

Cinder’s pulse roared in her ears. Her hands twitched. She smelled Ochre Brown’s round face melting off. His wide smile shattered with each of his teeth, going black and popping like corn.

this chapter is probably my favourite so far for this blending of so many elements. i cant even begin to like. THINK STRAIGHT about how all of this is tying together. the lore. the THEMATICS. like i said this character rly is just Rich with what og lacked and oh is it RICH. im gonna read this chapter in future and see so much that i know ive already missed. holy shit.

“Ms. Fall,” she said. “The White Fang requires your presence immediately.”

NOT NOW

Cinder stood there looking at it for a moment. Her thoughts were slow. Copper-tinged. Something small and indulgent whispered to her through the blood-fog.

It was obvious enough what would happen if she got into this car. The driver would take her to a secluded place, where she would be ambushed by a squadron of battle-hungry White Fang grunts.

They’d try to take her down. And she was a killer, wasn’t she? Ochre Brown wailed in her ears with every thump of her runaway heart. Her hands itched for action; her teeth, for blood.

She’d burn them black.

never mind! you are already dead,

She thought about Glynda. About her saying that if there was trouble with the Fang, she wanted to come. That she would fight for Cinder.

She thought of Glynda’s question: What aren’t you telling me about Ochre Brown?

Yeah, fuck that.

AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA OH MY GOD!!!!!!!!!! WHAT A CLIFFHANGER!!!!!!!!!! WHAT A MOMENT!!!!!!!!!!!!! MORE MOMENTOUSLY: WHAT A CHAPTER!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

this is EASILY my favourite chapter so far. EASILY. everything about this was peak offal. the relationships. the dynamics. the dialogue. the vibes. the Grossness. the fighting. the EVERYTHING. this is some other level and its BITCHIN. PEAK. that said im now very tired. im going to have a cup of tea and Consider Things for a few hours. brb.

[blookmallow]

playing rusty lake Roots... theres so much going on 

i wrote this post at like 2 AM last night so its kind of incoherent lmao

ok so now im following the family history of... maybe the founders of the rusty lake hotel? someone who is Involved Somehow. some weird shit is going on and im really into it but not quite following yet 

oH god theres a dead guy in the clock. ok 

i spent like 10 minutes solving puzzles in this room with that dude in there the whole time and i had no idea OK SURE 

then i had to burrow into his chest to steal his heart, as you do. sorry sir apparently i need it for some reason but it doesnt look like you’re using it anymore anyway 

very romantic

the absolutely batshit solutions to some of these are so good like. “she likes him! he likes her! help them communicate” “ok i will... give her a rose” “she likes the rose! oh she pricked herself and is bleeding everywhere now” “i... use her blood. for ink. with the feather i got from a raven earlier. so he can write her a love note. with her blood” “great job! they’re engaged now” “i see” 

and you’ll NEVER GUESS where i found a ring for her 

god damn it its you again

why is this disembodied hand following me everywhere i go... i didnt kill it this time it was already dead but like, Why 

oh fuck its the dudes!!!! from the hotel!!!! its the guys!!!! 

i can also see them in the hotel across the lake despite everyone else being humans this time and it feels like this should be Before the events of the, uh. dinner party. but it might be shadows of the future to come or something, there’s a lot of ominous Fate and something to do with memories happening here 

oh. that’s why i needed the heart. i see 

im collecting sacrifices for some kind of revival i think, im betting this is gonna end up being how mr. owl happened somehow 

oH god that’s. ok. fuckign christ 

thats not. how any of this works but sure ok that happened 

really not a fan of the fact that the solution to “how do i get the key from the dog” ended up being “feed it the woman’s fucking placenta after she gives birth” lmao ok

i do like when the solutions are like. unexpectedly horrifying, though. that moment of “wait. no. no. oh god. thats it isnt it” 

also the woman would only give me one bottle of milk (there’s three babies) so i had to fill another one with wine and another with water. i feel like this is a bad method of caring for your triplets but what do i kno 

i know this all isnt really meant to be taken literally tho i think... everything happening here is highly symbolic but im not sure exactly how

the milk goes to samuel, who seems the most normal/put together child, maybe the one who was treated the best/the most privileged one/the one closest to the mother 

the wine goes to albert who ends up being the most fucked up one so maybe thats a sign he was abused/maybe one or both parents had an alcohol problem they took out on him the most 

im not sure what the water would mean though, that one goes to emma and shes a botanist so, water for the flowers, i guess, she later commits suicide but i dont know why yet (or maybe it might not be explained at all) maybe it’s a. wasting away/neglected thing? 

hm.

im missing a shot i thought i had here but you’re in an alchemy lab trying to make this elixir and the alchemist won’t take it, and the only other thing in the room is.... the dog 

so i was just like :( im gonna kill the dog arent i 

but then 

the dog drank the elixir and was fine so the alchemist tried it and immediately died, so apparently it’s a 50/50 chance of either reaction and not “it works or it doesn’t” all around and now we have an immortal dog :’  ) 

either that or it just doesn’t affect dogs. time will tell i suppose

anyway this is how albert turned out and i would do anything for him LOOK at this baby boy 

he wanted a butterfly so i solved a bunch of very strange puzzles to obtain one for him 

fuCKing hell 

albert you’re not gonna believe this look what i found

FUCK yeah you look great 

i brought him the butterfly and he immediately stabbed it to death but really im more concerned with the fact that it’s BLEEDING RED 

look at him go

i carved a pumpkin mask for him and he loves it 

i hope albert knows i would die for him 

ok anyway uhh its 2 AM as of when im writing this so i should stop but im trying to work out thoughts on what the fuck is going on here so far 

ok so

james married mary and they had three kids

james might have murdered his uncle or something im still not sure why there was a dead guy in the clock at the beginning 

somethin sure happened there

james became fascinated with alchemy and eventually died trying to create an elixir of life. something or someone is trying to do some kind of weird revival ritual with body parts. i highly suspect that might be where mr. owl comes from

its not totally clear what’s going on with albert, he had a mark on his head when he was a baby but im not sure if his face is like that just bc birth mark or if the wasp incident made it worse or something, i feel like it wasnt as visible in the childhood scene but i dont remember now 

he wanted the butterfly when he was a kid too but it wasnt clear if he liked it or wanted to kill it then too. not sure if the wasp incident Changed Him/was the start of lifelong rivalry with samuel, or if albert’s just mentally ill and that was just One More Incident with his siblings bullying him, or maybe a combination of both

emma grows up to be a botanist but commits suicide for reasons unknown

there was a really weird disjointed flashback on emma’s side of the tree where albert kind of inadvertently dumped a kid into a well (he was... spinning the crank thing mayb stimming or something, the player makes the swing go too far to make the kid land there in the first place so idk if thats just The Hand Of Fate or what, but albert didnt technically do it he just was the reason he lost grip on the. thing where the rope goes/he didnt help the kid) (but again he’s. not mentally well, i think it was ‘he didnt understand what was going on’ more than ‘he committed a possible murder’) so idk if maybe that was emma’s kid?? she also may have been impregnated by plants. dont know what the fuck that was about either 

samuel marries a fortune teller named ida (and has more kids i think. i wasnt paying close enough attention to the photo on the wall) who albert also loves but she seems to think of him as the devil and has visions about him i think

it looks like albert loses it and puts some kind of curse on samuel possibly black magic/voodoo/something which MAY have turned him into mr. crow, which, fucked up if true 

but im hesitant to accept “albert’s just Fucked Up And Evil” bc... the wine bottle seems to imply he was not treated well as a baby/possibly abused, samuel knocked a wasp nest onto his head which isn’t massively outside the realm of like. sibling rivalry stuff (my brother once smacked me in the head with a snowglobe so hard i had to be rushed to the doctor when he was rly little/i was younger and we’re Completely Fine now lmao) but maybe fucked him up worse than they realized 

and the whole thing with ida, too. theres no detail given but it definitely seems like samuel is the favorite child and albert is the “we don’t talk about that one” child so its like. years of abuse/unequal treatment/etc and we dont necessarily know how samuel’s treated him all these years or if there could’ve been more/worse things going on 

i dont know!! i like him and i want him to get help and not just be condemned as the family demon just bc he spooky 

[feycreature]

Every other multiple of 2 as well as all prime numbers.

u are. mother fucker.

1. coffee mugs, teacups, wine glasses, water bottles, or soda cans?

coffee mugs. i have so many. 

2. chocolate bars or lollipops?

lollipops but i dont eat sweets much to begin with

3. bubblegum or cotton candy?

bubblegum

5. do you prefer to drink soda from soda cans, soda bottles, plastic cups or glass cups?

i prefer to not drink soda

6. pastel, boho, tomboy, preppy, goth, grunge, formal or sportswear?

somewhere between goth and grunge side note what the fuck is boho

7. earbuds or headphones?

headphones

10. game you were best at in p.e.?

FLOOR HOCKEY. my sophomore year we cut our hockey unit short by a week because the Str8 Boys got mad that they didnt understand hockey and my team kicked ass

11. what you have for breakfast on an average day?

lunch.

13. lanyard or key ring?

i dont have keys.

14. favorite non-chocolate candy?

this is hard bc i dont eat sweets and i dont like chocolate much to begin with. im gonna go with starbursts

17. most frequently worn pair of shoes?

doc martens but theyre hiking boots

18. ideal weather?

60 degrees, sunny, not windy, maybe a little rainy.

19. sleeping position?

side, mostly

22. role model? 

i try to live a life that would make taliesin jaffe proud

23. strange habits?

oh there are so many but the only one that comes to mind is blowing into cups when i take them out of the cupboard

26. favorite activity to do in warm weather?

oh fuck i love swimming. but i havent swam in years. and probably wont get to until i get top surgery. so im gonna go with jet skiing because i can actually Do that

29. best way to bond with you?

i was gonna say share music with me but. the real answer is play dnd with me i am not joking

30. places that you find sacred?

other peoples’ homes. thats not my place to Be thats not my place to interfere with i Hate being in other peoples homes. our last two store meetings have been at my managers’ houses and i HATE knowing where my managers live and i HATE that ive been in their houses and sat on their furniture and eaten their food that is Their Space im not their friend i do not belong there

31. what outfit do you wear to kick ass and take names?

any t shirt, ripped black jeans, tall docs with too many buckles, black denim jacket i turned into a vest with safety pins along the shoulders, an assortment of spiky accessories, probably eyeliner

34. advertisements you have stuck in your head?

my dad forces the o’reily’s jingle into my brain on a daily basis

37. suitcase or duffel bag?

duffel bag

38. lemonade or tea?

arnold palmer babey

41. last person you texted?

u, dork. altho if we’re talking actual phone number texting, then my mom

42. jacket pockets or pants pockets?

it depends what it is. if its something im definitely using and will be annoyed for sure if i leave in my jacket like my phone or wallet it goes in my pants pockets, if its something im temporarily holding or wont use any time soon like pens/my inhaler/pads/change it goes in my jacket

43. hoodie, leather jacket, cardigan, jean jacket or bomber jacket?

comfort and my actual wardrobe says jean jacket, but my heart and aesthetic say bomber jacket

46. most comfortable outfit to sleep in?

sweatshirt and underwear.

47. favorite type of cheese?

gouda i think

50. what made you laugh the hardest you ever have?

learning that one of my coworkers had a crush on one of the clowns from barnum and baileys and stands by it followed immediately by another coworker chiming in with “okay but teenage simba was HOT”

53. what is the current state of your hands?

cold and scabby (my tattoo is still healing)

54. what did you learn from your first job?

dont work in a warehouse. just dont.

58. four talents you’re proud of having?

i can draw, i can sing in front of people, id like to think im a good dm, and im apparently good enough at navigating customer service that in my year and a half at starbucks only ONE customer has ever complained about me and it was over something i said that she misheard

59. if you were a video game character, what would your catchphrase be? 

i was going to say “based on what i say the most itd be okie dokie” but thats a lie by that logic it would actually be “hi! what can we get started for you?”

61. favorite line you heard from a book/movie/tv show/etc.?

“If I could pull the blood of you from my veins, I would.” -vex, critical role

62. seven characters you relate to?

OOH OKAY THIS WAS A LOT HARDER THAN I THOUGHT ITD BE

weiss schnee (rwby)

rabbit (steam powered giraffe)

wolf (kippo and the age of wonderbeasts)

scorpia (she-ra)

aubrey little (the adventure zone)

beauregard (critical role)

ruby rose (also rwby)

66. favorite flower(s)?

lillies!

67. good luck charms?

a collection of randomly found foreign change in my jacket pocket, a pretty d10 that was accidentally included in one of my dice orders in my Other jacket pocket

70. left or right handed?

so. im right handed. but im naturally left handed. my granny was one of those people who thinks left handed people are the devil so she forced me to use my right hand, so i default to using my left hand but its absolutely useless

71. least favorite pattern?

FUCK PAISLEY.

73. favorite weird flavor combo?

i know that this Means like mint chocolate or pineapple on pizza or something but. toffee nut and peppermint starb syrups. nobody believes me that its good except the supervisor that got me to try it. its good i swear.

74. at what pain level out of ten (1 through 10) do you have to be at before you take an advil or ibuprofen?

about a 6 unless its a prescription. if i can stand im gonna suck it up

78. coffee from a gas station or sushi from a grocery store?

im rly paranoid about foodborne illness so i Have to go with gas station coffee even tho im a little bit of a coffee snob

79. which looks better, your school id photo or your driver’s license photo?

jokes on u i dont have either!

82. pc or console?

pc is this even a question

83. writing or drawing?

drawing

86. cookies or cupcakes?

cookies

89. who would you put before everyone else?

buster.

90. luckiest mistake?

the other day i made a drink wrong and more complicated that it needed to be and the moment i realized my mistake someone came through the drive thru and ordered the EXACT drink i had just made by mistake 

94. favorite season?

fall, hands down

97. how many phone numbers do you have memorized?

exactly one and its mine

98. favorite historical era?

romantic.

[sunflowerstache]

A Happy Man (Part 2)

A/N: Hello beauties! This is the sequel to my first ever angst piece “You’ll Be Okay” and I really love it! It’s loosely based off the song Die A Happy Man by Thomas Rhett! As always, if you enjoyed/have questions/comments/suggestions/all of the above, please let me know! I love hearing from y'all so much and I love you all to bits!

Word Count: 3.1k

Masterlist            Part 1

“Have a nice Saturday love.”

Your phone buzzed on the end table next to your spot on the couch, indicating another incoming message from Harry. And just like every other day, you left the message unanswered. For the past 4 days, like clockwork, he had sent you a text at exactly 8:15am, wishing you a good day, and another at 9:30pm reminding you that he loves you. After walking out of yours and Harry’s hotel’s room 4 days ago, you had immediately flown home and showed up a sobbing mess at your parent’s doorstep. Upon the door opening, you found your father raising a baseball bat and your mother hidden on the staircase, in fear of an intruder – as it was the early hours of the morning – a sight you would laugh at if it were any other circumstance. Once your parents realized it was just you, and that you were a wreck, they quickly ushered you inside and to the couch, so you could explain what was wrong. That was days ago, and here you were, still seated in the same spot, staring off into space while your parents watched from the entryway.

“She’s going to start growing into the couch if she doesn’t move Y/M/N.” your dad whispered, or at least whispered as much as a dad was capable.

There was a small thud, and you knew your mom had gently smacked your father’s chest, “He meant a lot to her. She just needs some time.”

“And she can hear you both.” You turned your head to look at the two of them huddled together. “I appreciate you letting me crash here, but you don’t have to dote over me. I’m a big girl. Go to the Christmas Tree Shop or whatever it is you retired folk do.” You tried to crack a smile, but you knew it looked more like grimace.

“Oh hunny, you don’t have to thank us. You’re our baby, of course you are always welcome here.” Your mom cooed as she scuttled across the room to sit next to you and run her fingers through your hair, “Everything’s going to work itself out. I promise.”

“My offer still stands monkey. You let me know where he is, and I’ll go have a nice little chat with Harold.” Your dad smiled, still standing at the entryway.

“No dad. The last thing I want is for you to talk to him right now. It would only make things worse. I mean, I didn’t break up with him. I just told him I needed time. So that’s what I’m doing. Taking some time.” You took a deep breath, talking more to yourself than to your parents now, “Not broken up.”

~~~

“She broke up with me, mum.” Harry’s groan was muffled by the thick white duvet as he laid face down on his hotel bed, still in yesterday’s clothes. “I’ve tried to talk to her every day, and there’s no reply.” Similarly to Y/N, Harry had spent the last 4 days in the same position; wallowing in self-pity and crying to his mother.

“She didn’t my dear. You told me what she said, and she just needs some time.” Anne was seated next to her son, running her hands through his short curls, “You have to understand where she’s coming from. The two of you have been strong for two years, this is just a small bump. Everyone goes through them.”

“Not us, mum. We don’t do this. We never fight, and we never walk away from each other. We’re best friends. Or, we were at least.”

“The two of you are two peas in a pod, don’t doubt that Harry. You have a very busy life, and I mean this with every ounce of love I have for you,” Harry turned his head to peak out from under the blanket to look at Anne, “but you do tend to put quite a lot on your plate. And you never were one for clearing your plate. You’ve been so focused on finding things to keep you busy during this time off, that you’ve put some things to the back burner. Some important things.”

It was like Harry was transported back in time, listening to the bustling streets below while everyone carried on with their lives. Like he wasn’t losing his mind 14 floors above their heads. He knew his mum was right. He always wanted to have a plan a, and a plan b, and plan c, but there was never a risk for that lifestyle before. Never the chance for his precisely planned life to cause such an uproar. But here he was, a weeping, snotty, mess because he planned for everything except his love leaving him.

“Let me ask you, Harry. All of the money, the designer clothes, the followers, notoriety, is it all what’s most important to you? Would you be the happiest with only that?”

His head was shaking before Anne could even finish her questions. There was no doubt in his mind that everything he has, everything his unprecedented luck has been able to provide him, meant nothing if he had no one to share it with. No one to come home to laugh about cute fan encounters with. Nothing without anyone to call up when the silence of empty hotel rooms becomes too much.  “Absolutely not.”

“Then in your heart, you know what to do.” She nodded and patted Harry’s back before getting up and disappearing through the front door.

~~~

“Alright, look munchkin. I love you, you know that. But the ass that’s supposed to be making a dent in the couch is mine. I didn’t retire for you to beat me to it.” Your dad plopped down on the couch next to you. “You have a bed upstairs for that.”

“Can’t dad. ‘ve got pictures of him up there. Don’t wanna look at them right now.” You paused, hearing your mother on the phone, for the 4thtime today, “Who she keep talking to?”

You heard him huff next to you, “Who knows. She’s always got something new to gossip about these days. This week, it’s been about Martha leaving the office to go to the company upstairs.”

You were thankful for your dad. While your mother was always the one to sit you down and talk some sense into you when something was going awry, your dad was the comedic relief you needed. He always knew how to take your mind off of the seriousness of life. Which Is exactly what you needed right now.

“I wasn’t going to say anything, ya know, because of the reason you’re here and all, but you smell kid. I don’t know how it works across the pond, but over here we have these things called showers. It’s real neat, you go in and wash you-“

“Oh my god, shut up dad. We have showers for fucks sake.” You laughed, leaning over to rest your head on his shoulder. The two of you sat in silence for a moment, the soft murmur of Netflix and your soft breathing filled the air.

“Everything’s going to work out darling. Everyone goes through a rough patch, and it was about time the two of you had yours.” He stopped for a moment, “You know, your mother and I separated for a couple of months.”

Your head shot up at that and looked wide eyed at your father. For your entire life, you idolized your parent’s relationship and wished for nothing more than to achieve what they have. You never would have imagined that they went through any sort of issues. “No you didn’t! When?”

“You were about a year old. I was working double shifts every week while she stayed home with you. She wanted to be able to be there for you every day, watch you grow, and I would have loved nothing more, but someone had to pay for all the diapers you shit in.” you both chuckled, “Me not being home was too much for her and she told me she needed time. Sound familiar?”

“How’d you get past it?”

“I had been staying with your uncle for a couple months, and then woke up one morning, looked in the mirror and told myself I was an idiot for walking away so easily. So, I went back to the house, sat her down, told her how much I loved her and that I was working so hard so that the two of you could have the best lives possible. That’s all I want – the two of you to be happy and not worry about anything.”

The tears were starting to form in your eyes, thinking about how similar your situation is to what your parents went through. Not wanting to sit and cry in front of your dad, again, you patted his knee and stood up.

“About time I go shower, yeah? Wash this stink off.” you smiled and made your way to the staircase, leading to the second floor of your childhood home.

“I love you kiddo.” Your dad called after you, making some warmth spread through your relatively cold body.

In any other situation, you would be disgusted with yourself that this was your first shower in 4 days. But showering was the last thing on your mind recently. As you stood under the searing water, you thought over everything your father had said. Everything he spoke about, you knew is how Harry felt. He told you every chance he got that he loved providing for you, loved being able to make you smile. And it didn’t take much. You got so much joy just by watching in achieve the things he dreamed of and standing behind the scenes to see just how much the love of your life has achieved. But that wasn’t what caused your departure. You had watched Harry make room in his busy life for countless people, so why couldn’t he do that for someone he loved? You thought back to your trip to Italy and hung your head. In his own way, you realized, he did.  After canceling your museum tour, he had the two of your sit in bed all night and watch a Italian historical documentary. Brought you to the private hotel pool with a bottle of wine after not being able to go to the beach and left you a note the morning of your cancelled breakfast date. You realized these were all ways he showed you he cared and wasn’t trying to put work ahead of you. And here you were, standing in your parent’s shower, ignoring all his loving messages every day, just so you could justify your leaving. Quickly shutting off the water, you grabbed a towel and made a beeline to your old room, needing to get dressed and find your phone. You had apologizing to do.

You ran down the stairs, after throwing on some old black sweats and a white t-shirt, your hair still dripping from the shower and leaving a trail of water in your path. Getting to the space you were occupying on the couch, you noticed that your phone was no longer on the charger, “Mom! Where did you move my phone?”

No response.

“Seriously mom! I need to use my phone.”

Again, not response, just the sound of glasses clinking in the kitchen.

“I can hear you in the kitchen. If you’re ignoring me because you’re on the phone with someone from the office, talking about Martha again, I swear I’m gon-“ you choked on your sentence upon entering the kitchen, where you expected to find your mother.

The two of you stared at each other like deer caught in headlights, not knowing what to do or say. A wine glass was gently set down, and the room was so silent that you could hear the silent ringing it made when making contact with the marble countertop. You could feel your breathing start to pick up when he licked his lips and whisper a soft “Hi.”

“He – wha – what are you – how did?”

“I called your mom earlier. Told her I wanted to come. See you.”

You nodded, biting the inside of your lip, not knowing how to get past the awkward tension in the air. You had never experienced this with Harry, this foggy unknown feeling. And you hated it.

“Why.”

“Why what?” lines formed on his forehead

“Why – why would you want to see me?

He continued to just stare at you, like you just asked him the meaning of life, with his mouth agape and hands on now resting on top of the counter. “Because I love you. And I’m not letting this be over. I’m not.” He shrugged, “I know you sai-“

“I’m sorry.” You exclaimed, interrupting whatever he was about to say, “I’m sorry for assuming you cared more about work. I’m sorry for blaming you for cancelling things. I’m sorry for leaving. I’m sorry, so sorry.”

Before you knew what was happening, he had raced around the kitchen island and scooped you into his arms before your knees could buckled beneath you. Muffled gasps were coming from between your lips as Harry ran his hands over the back of your head.

“Shhh, hey none of that. It’s alright. You’re okay. I’m here.”

The two of you stayed locked in one another’s arms for what seemed like hours, making up for missing the feel of each other. Missing the way you could feel Harry’s heartbeat on your temple when hugging him. Him missing the feeling of your hands wound around his torso, toying with his back-belt loops. The two of you missing the comforting smell of the other. Slowly, once your crying subsided, Harry backed away slightly so that he could look at you.

“I think we have some stuff to talk about, yeah?” you nodded simultaneously and moved to sit down, facing each other, on the kitchen island stools. He gently picked up both your hands in his own, “Before you say anything, I need you to know I love you. I am so fucking in love with you that it makes my head spin. And when you walked out of that hotel room, I felt like I was drowning.” You moved to apologize again, but he quickly cut you off, “I don’t want to hear another apology out of you. Don’t ever apologize for your feelings. The hurt you’re feeling is yours to feel however you see fit.”

“I just, I don’t want you to think I’m asking you to choose, H. I would never. I know how much your career means to you, it means everything to me too. Watching you succeed and do what you love means the world to me.” You sniffled, trying make sure he understood that you support him in everything he does.

“But I would. I would choose. Because as much as I love the traveling and picking up new projects, and always being busy, I love you more. I love you more than all the sushi I could stomach in Japan. More than the packages Gucci sends me with new clothes. More than there are stars in the sky. So, I’mthe sorry one. I’m so sorry I ever made you doubt that, m‘love.” His eyes started to glaze over, accent getting thicker, as the threat of tears grew closer and closer.

“My career has given me more than I could ever ask for. This life I live gives me opportunities I never in a million years could have wished for. But absolutely none of it means anything if you’re not there to share it with me.” The smile that graced Harry’s face was brighter than anything you’ve ever seen on him. His dimples were prominent on his hair covered jaw, small crow’s feet loitered around the corners of his eyes, and his hands tightened in yours.

“But you should be able to do those things without worrying about me. About making sure I’m alright. You’re so young and so successful Harry! You shouldn’t have to worry about how I’m feeling 24/7. You should be able to do what you want, when you want it.  To be your own person.” You argued, knowing that this argument was slowly fleeting, as your love for the man in front of you was overpowering any doubts you had.

“I know who I am, doll. But I also know that I’m better with you. I’m better when I wake up to see your hair sprawled all over the bed. Better when I see you in that black dress that makes it hard for me to breathe. Better when you’re around. So, if I never get to see the Eiffel Tower again, or drive a new sports car, that’s okay.”  he shrugged, seeing your inner turmoil in your eyes, “Because if the only thing that I have in life is your hand in mine, then I could die a happy man.”

You took your hand out of his hold to brush away the tears that had made their way down your puffy cheeks. Guilt flooded through your veins for ever thinking that Harry loved you any less than how he described. So, you leaned forward to place a kiss to his lips, needing him to know you loved him just the same.

“I quite like the Eiffel tower.” You whispered once your lips disconnected from his, and a small chuckle left his lips,

“I know petal. I just want you to know that I don’t need a fancy destination because you’re my great escape. My sense of normalcy in this crazy life. You’re the one I want to repaint the living room while listening to Sinatra radio and dance around the fireplace with.”

You knew when starting this relationship that things would get difficult, what with being in the public eye and all the moving around. But you also knew that it was all worth it. It was worth it when you got to see Harry after walking off stage, after his morning jog, with his tongue sticking out between his lips while jotting things down in his journal. All the scrutiny was worth it when you got to slow dance in the kitchen or lounge all day with Evie. And no amount of rescheduling or cancellations would change that.

“Did you really just try to flex your Gucci deliveries to me?”

Taglist: @theasstour @emotionally-imbruised @harryspirate @swayingnoodlelove

[ohpenelopes]

                    i mean i could be aesthetic but instead i'm just pathetic

ALISHA BOE? No, that’s actually PENELOPE “PENNY” BROWN-PATIL from the NEXT GENERATION ERA. You know, the child of LAVENDER BROWN and PARVATI PATIL? Only 21 years old, this HUFFLEPUFF alumni works as a BARISTA and is sided with THE NEUTRALS. SHE identifies as a CIS WOMAN and is a PUREBLOOD who is known to be SELF-PITYING, A PERFECTIONIST, and INSECURE but also FLEXIBLE, GENTLE and IMAGINATIVE. 

LINKS – pinboard, stats. CHARACTER PARALLELS – jackie burkhart ( that 70s show ), chloe gemell ( my mad fat diary ), mini mcguinness ( skins uk ), engel beekman ( skam nl ), cassie howard ( euphoria ), emaline ( everything sucks! ), gretchen wieners ( mean girls ), caroline forbes ( the vampire diaries -- earlier seasons ), kelly kapoor ( the office ) AESTHETIC – star shaped hoop earrings, drawing hearts all over your notes, needle pricked finger tips, unapologetic femininity, a loud and cheerful laugh echoing through a hallway, pinky promises, heart shaped sunglasses hiding hungover stained eyes, movie nights with popcorn and rose wine, drowning in the sea of your own thoughts HEADS UP – this intro has mentions of anxiety, but i’ve marked all of these with a trigger warning! <3

backstory ( 2008 - 2026 )

penny is born penelope lyra brown-patil --- penelope, for the woman who not only waited faithfully for her husband’s return for years, but who tricked many man in the process; lyra, for the constellation (because the stars are so wise) --- and as the second (and eventual middle) child to lavender and parvati

and she grows up happy. her childhood is peaceful and wonderful, filled with fun days and laughter. there’s not much out of the ordinary --- it’s stable and beautiful, and penny longs for those days quite a lot.

at some point, she learns of the things her parents went through at school, about war and rebellion and fear. penny admires her mothers more than anything --- she’s scared of this world, of this past, but she’s filled with admiration and a bit of fear that she won’t be able to live up to that. (she doesn’t have to, of course --- there’s no pressure or reason to, but still; she wonders about it, and she can’t shake the thought.)

anxiety tw | though life was stable and good, penny has always felt very uncertain about ... everything. insecurity has never been a stranger to her, nor has anxiety or pressure. she has high expectations of herself, expecting nothing short of the best --- and when she failed as a child (whether it was in playing quidditch on toy brooms or when drawing or when trying to sing perfectly), she would throw tantrums. she got help for this as a child after she had her first full-blown anxiety attack, but it never really faded. | end of tw

her interests as a child mostly range from princess stories to drawing elaborate things to cutting out pretty outfits from fashion magazines. she’s gentle and quiet and excitable when she wants to be, a whirlwind of pink and smiles and tangled long hair

at hogwarts, penny is sorted in hufflepuff (though the hat did consider ravenclaw) for her spirit. she doesn’t mind not being a gryffindor like her parents once were (or, at least, she doesn’t later on; at first it just seems like an affirmation that she’s not as brave as they are), likes how yellow compliments her eyes and fits in quite nicely among the puffs.

anxiety tw | teenagedom is a tough time for her. it seems like everyone is able to juggle it all, and then there’s penny: unable to keep up good grades and look pretty and have an exciting social life and have enough sleep. she feels like she’s drowning in all the expectations she has for herself, feels like she’s the only one on this world who is suffering (she’s prone to a woe is me mentality, for sure) and so hides it all behind perfectly curated smiles. her insecurity has always been strong, but it grows. she drowns them out by pretending. end of tw

in those years, she should be learning who she is, but in stead, penny learns how to be what others want. she shifts and shapes and bends herself to match others expectations --- she’s loud and funny and excitable among her peers, grinning widely and flipping her hair, appearing confident and extroverted and completely at ease. sometimes she’s quieter, a more gentle and softer being, lovely and quaint. she’s a model student (minus the amazing grades) to her teachers, a kind older housemate to the first years, a tough bitch when situations call for it. and sometimes it feels genuine, this person she’s showing off, and sometimes it all feels like a play. it depends, on her mood, on the role, on the weather, on the stars.

and you know what? it works. for most of the time. and then sometimes, it doesn’t, and there’s nothing to do but cry endless tears in her bed and be the most melodramatic person in the castle. alcohol tw | this happens when she’s drunk most of the time, to be honest --- penny is such a messy drunk. end of tw 

penny also developed a taste for fuckboys during this time. she wanted to feel loved, she wanted to be touched, to be desired, and part of her was desperate --- but that didn’t make it okay for guys to treat her that way, period. i would get into this more but i don’t feel comfy about doing that akdjssdf. 

when she turned fourteen, she got a sewing machine for her birthday. the next schoolyear, she dragged the thing behind her into the castle, unable to part from it after a summer of sewing. penny had always been interested in fashion, but now she was able to take it to the next level.

the dream to become a fashion designer grows and grows and grows, and penny is quite handy with the sewing machine, and her designs aren’t half bad, but of course it’s a stupid dream --- because penny doesn’t believe in herself, not yet at least.

post-graduation life ( 2026 - now )

penny graduated with one ambition only (see above) and no faith in herself. she became a barista, telling herself that she would work on her self esteem, that she would build herself up and become stronger and ready, that she would work on her portfolio and her design skills and that she would practice and work hard and ... that’s where she’s been for the past few years.

not much has changed, to be honest. penny still feels like that lost teenager, and in a certain sense she is --- she has just gained a slight bit of maturity, has moved out and has started working. her sense of self is still incredibly fragile, as is her self esteem, and while she’s trying to improve it, she just hasn’t found the right way to. 

she feels so stuck. she feels so frozen. she feels like she has no clue who the hell she is, and she doesn’t know what to do about changing that. another part of her doesn’t even want to be thinking about these things, and just wants to have some fun --- once penny graduated, she definitely started partying more sfksjdfhsdkjfh. party girls dont get hurt!!!!! and like, on one hand, that’s all completely fine, because this is the time for fun and self discovery, and who says you can’t do both? 

the timeclash kind of turned everything upside down. it did for everyone, i imagine, but that’s not really how penny sees it (woe is me! why does everything bad always happen to me!!). she’s so scared sakjdf. scared to see her parents and to be a Big Disappointment because she’s scared of the fact that there’s suddenly a war (like, what the fuck?), because she doesn’t want to fight, because she doesn’t even know how to fight!!! 

she’s a coward lmao, but a coward with Standards (lookin at you peter)

i mean, if it came down to it --- if she had to protect her friends or family --- she would fight, of course. she’s just not very good at combatical magic, or at strategy, or at anything war or rebellion-related, really (except for smuggling booze into hogwarts, i guess, but that’s something of the past). and that’s fine, if you ask me, but penny doesn’t think it is --- but that doesn’t mean she’s going to push herself to be braver or to do more

personality & details

jfc i rambled so much up there, time to get a bit more coherent up in this BITCH

penny is such a mess. i have a hard time talking about her sometimes because she’s so messy and because her mood and her energy fluctuate so much --- she can be high energy and extroverted one moment, and completely down and sad the other. 

did i ... project myself .... onto penny?     maybe. partly.

she’s a bit of a chameleon, really. she’s very adaptable and flexible and willing to change for the comfort of others, and she thus feels like she has a small sense of self. this is true, to a certain extent. i think she’s too focused on finding herself that she doesn’t see that she’s already found herself a little, that there are parts of her that are genuine. she’s so hard on herself, expects so much, she’s just ... completely blinded by her own doubts, tbh.

and she’s def a sad bitch and a messy bitch, but she’s so much fun. god. penny just loves laughing and being happy and doing fun and cute stuff! she likes good things! so much! she tries to be such an upbeat person and she can be and agh. i love her like that.

such a romantic. pls stop her. her idea of love makes her so blind and deaf and she always falls for dumb boys :( but skfjshdf she just loves romance! and romantic comedies! and romance novels (tho she struggles to focus on books properly, ngl) and just ... pink hearts and all that fuzzy stuff

when she got her job as a barista, all she thought was that it might just bring her the perfect coffee shop romance

she’s an idiot

she usually just goes by penny, but not because she dislikes the name penelope --- she thinks it’s a really neat name, to be honest (a bit poetic and mysterious), but penny has just been her nickname for so long that she doesn’t want to make people call her penelope. BUT she does want to be referred to as penelope when she gets famous, thank you very much.

regarding that: penny wants to be famous dskfjhdsf. a famous designer, of course --- but she just likes the idea of fame altogether as well!!! 

she takes that dream and ambition seriously, in a way. she plans to take serious steps soon (but she’s been saying that for years), always waiting until she feels ready to put herself out there. the idea of being rejected is just ... massive. the idea of not succeeding, of flopping, is so terrifying, that she prefers sticking with her dead-end job, for now. she has been sewing a lot after graduation, and i imagine she constructs a fair amount of her outfits herself (and does the same for friends), but that’s it, and she’s such a Coward about it

when she buys fashion magazines, she always gets two copies so she can use one for cutouts so she can make collages and moodboards

aEsThEtIc QuEeN!!!!

no really though, she has such a good sense for aesthetics. knows what colours and fabrics and prints mesh well together, always looks on Point, etcetera. 

idk what to say this intro is such a gd mess bc i wrote everything from scratch and i kept changing my mind about things and while penny is a Very old muse, i changed a LOT oops!!! 

[angrylizardjacket]

You know what it's time for?? 2019 Oscars and Giselle!!

Giselle is dressed to the nines in a stunning white dress, off the shoulder, fitted with a slit up to her thigh and red detailing to lowkey match roger but not enough to ‘look like Missus Fucking Claus’.

side note, Ryan Destiny plays giselle in her biopic All That Glitters, and in this universe, there is definitely a music cinematic universe, both taron as elton, and rami as freddie appear in ATG (and so does ben, obviously). giselle takes a photo of taron, rami, and ryan all together and posts it with the caption ‘legendary’ and it’s everywhere online in less than two hours

(at the after party, someone posts two photos on instagram; the first of rami and ryan grinning and hugging and both holding their oscars, and the second of giselle and freddie at a party in the early to mid 70s, a rare photo of a young giselle absolutely beaming, their arms around each other as they both smile at the camera, and giselle cries for a full half an hour)

Side, side note: Ben definitely had a crush on giselle as a teenager as he was listening to a lot of her and queen.

Giselle hears about Ben's comment about 70s Roger and almost Yells

"God I can't believe he was perfect for the roll"

giselle’s daughters don’t come along, but her granddaughter, Maggie, is invited as she plays Teenage Giselle in the film.

um I LOVE LITTLE MAGGIE LOSING HER FUCKING MIND AND MEETING CELEBRITIES AND HAVING TO BE CHILL ABOUT IT

Like, the idea that maggie, who literally grew up with celebrities breezing in and out of her grandparents home for all of her life, still gets excited about meeting celebrities.

She takes a video on the red carpet of tom holland, he’s standing a few feet away and you can hear what sounds like ryan giving an interview somewhere nearby, and maggie just zooms in on him: (a whisper) it’s him. The spider boy.

The video ends because tom actually turns, spots her, and gives a little wave and Maggie makes a surprised noise before the video cuts out.

She's also got the biggest heart eyes for letitia wright, and there's a series of photos someone's taken of Maggie giving her the most starry eyed gaze, followed by Maggie nervously asking to take a photo with her, and then a photo of the two of them posing together and Maggie looks like she's barely containing her excitement.

Giselle, Ryan, and Maggie have one of the slow motion videos taken; the three of them lounging casually on each other, Ryan is flipping her hair, Giselle is looking at her nails, and Maggie is yawning, all three of them look absolutely gorgeous; mean and sharp and perfect.

Maggie wears a high-necked, black, sleeveless velvet dress that hits just below her knees and has constellations made from diamonds from the hip down.

i have a big ATG post that i didn’t finish for the golden globes, that i’ll try and get around to later, but in it i talk about how Giselle comes out of musical retirement to write a song for the movie, and she performs it at the oscars. to steal from that post for a moment;

Giselle comes out of musical retirement and writes a new song for the film; that’s the final song before the credits, it’s called ‘That Big Wide Unknown’ it’s about how she will dig her heels in to keep the family and the happiness that she has, and how they’ve grown and strengthened for the hardships they’ve endured, though the chorus comes back to marigold’s death, and includes the lines;

i always believed my girl is up there somewhere / but i can’t see my past for the streetlights / i hope she sees / oh god, she sees i’m sorry / i hope to god she knows we tried

it wins Best Original Song, Film, and Lead Actress (ben is nominated for best actor in a supporting role, but doesn’t win; also nominated for sound design)

The director of ATG pulls Giselle onstage with the rest of the cast and crew when they win best picture, and at the end of the director’s speech she hands over ‘did you want to say anything?’

"this, like everything I do, is for my girls, my daughters, my granddaughter, girls like me who want to see themselves on tv, and in movies, and winning best [bleep] picture, to girls like Ryan who know they can win best [bleep] actor! This win is for our future!"

Roger definitely teared up big time.

Giselle took (and framed, afterwards) a photo of Maggie, who has jumped into Castor's (Brian's son, Maggie's dad, we'll get into that in the future) arms, and he's got tears of pride in his eyes, her legs wrapped around him where she's burried her face in his neck and he's pressing a kiss to her temple, and Lilith is hugging her from behind, sandwiching Maggie between them, and they both parents are absolutely beaming with pride. Lilith posts it on all her social media with the caption 'couldnt be prouder of my legacy'

Okay!! at the after party, first of all; Lilith and Castor are invited, but she lets Maggie roam as long as she's with one of the ATG of BoRhap folks they trust.

Roger gives maggie a single glass of champagne “don’t tell your grandma”

of course giselle manages to spot it after maggie’s only had a single sip, and she takes the drink off her immedately, “roger, she’s sixteen! be responsible!” is what she tells him before she proceeds to drink half of it and give it back, “don’t tell your mother” is what she tells maggie

Castor gives her a glass of wine "you're allowed to celebrate a little, but don't tell your grandparents, okay?"

Patience (Brian's wife, again, future stuff) gives her a gin and tonic

Brian gives her half a beer

Lilith isn't surprised but is disappointed (Giselle is kind of proud; what a mom mood) "you five got a sixteen year old drunk!!"

But also Maggie gets super melancholy whilst drunk about all the BoRhap/ATG stuff ending since it's the end of the awards season, and at the end of the night when Giselle goes to find her to take her home, she finds Ben and Rami chatting on like a little set of couches to the side and Maggie's managed to fall asleep on Ben, all tucked up against his side, and Giselle thinks it's the cutest thing in the world and takes a photo but Maggie is Mortified the next day because she definitely still has a crush on him

She actually had a lot of conversations with a lot of her celebrity crushes while tipsy and she's both pleased and embarrassed.

Maggie, stage whispering where she's leaning against Ben on the couch: I have a crush on Ryan, don't tell grandma because it's weird

Ben, petting her face softly as she yawns: I won't

Ben, internally: Who Got This Child Drunk

Giselle spends a lot of the night with the cast, she's got such love for Rami and both of them are tispy and clutching oscars, and Giselle takes his face in her hands and tells him with the utmost seriousness "I love you for who you are, and you did such an incredible job embodying one of my closest friends. You're family, Rami, you're family to me."

Rami cries and hugs her.

Giselle doesn’t get too drunk at the after party, but early on into the after party she takes Roger into the bathroom; it’s tradition at this point. @ginghampearlsnsweettea​ and I were discussing this and she had the most valid take i’ve ever read;

Gizelle and Roger have a reputation for getting it on at award shows and the 91st Oscars is no exception. Kids, grandkids, friends, and various other celebs be damned.

Someone: Don’t you think you’re getting a bit old for this?

Them: Never

Lbr that someone is probably Brian

Rami asks Brian where Gizelle and Rog are because he wants to take a picture with them.

“I have no idea and please don’t go looking for them.”

[talkingismylifewrites]

Broo ok could you give me ANYTHING HONESTLY ANYTHING with a king scenario?? Like theres johanna and regina (or whatever names you want idc) and ronald (gdhdns UGLY NAME SORRY) and dominic? Like sexy stuff, fluffy stuff, sexy fluffy stuff I DONT CARE (also its understandable if you dont write genderbends i just love ur hcs and style of writing SO MUCH)

i love genderbends, don’t worry! one day i will write my joger epic wherein roger is regina, the kickass drummer who blows john richard deacon’s mind because this fandom is lacking in genderbends particularly with girl!roger

Anyways, hope you enjoy!!

i feel like??? it just goes without saying that in the king!au they’re a little more...cautious about having babies

Regina and Johanna aren’t just like, normal women, they are Musicians and their job is 24/7 and demanding

Johanna getting pregnant initially was a Big Deal and not just because of Ron’s uber catholic family but because the band had to wrap up a tour as fast as possible, start working on a new album, and schedule in some maternity leave because yknow BABY

(Johanna was SO SCARED to tell the girls?? like she was worried they’d kick her out and make her leave because it was so ill-timed)

(not that you can TIME an accidental pregnancy. and really, if we’re gonna blame anyone blame Melina because she’s the one who literally poured tequila down her’s and Ron’s throats)

(so when Johanna found out she told, in order, her doctor, Ron, her mother, Ron’s mother, the cab driver who picked her up from the station, the woman who gave her the chocolate chip scone at her favorite bakery, and then the girls)

(Regina was the first to recover from the shock. she practically flew into her arms and started babbling about how wonderful it all was, how exciting, a baby!! what would they name it?? definitely Regina, such a regal name, and of course she’ll be godmother--

While Melina tried to hide that she was crying before sending Miami off to go fetch a bottle of sparkling apple cider as they deserved a toast! 

Brianna was the only one who was hesitant in celebrating, after all, they’d have a lot to manage before it came, but yes, congrats, Johanna! such a blessing)

Yes, so babies

Very strict about the babies because while little Rebecca was the reason they all got together, another baby could easily be why they all fell apart

Regina never wants to give up touring and making music, which a baby could impede

Johanna of course wants more, but she also doesn’t want to stop while they’re still going

(it’s also so not her turn, okay she only just managed to fit back into her prebaby jeans)

Ron and Dominic? 

They definitely want more kids 

For sure

Like Dominic just wants more little girls with Regina’s eyes and Ron’s reddish hair or Johanna’s smile and his own nose

But they’d never enforce that on their girls 

So they all decide: no babies until they’re ready

(they last exactly one year)

On Dominic’s birthday, they all proceed to get absolutely blitzed on too much red wine and too much good food while on tour in the south of Spain

Regina is the one who suggests skinny dipping in the Mediterranean but its Ron who initiates the sex

what originally was just Regina and Johanna splashing each other turns into Ron carrying Johanna caveman style back into their rental house and laying her out on the floor and licking the salt from her skin while Regina throws her legs over her shoulders and goes to town

Dominic follows shortly behind, shouting that it’s his birthday and he will not be ignored like this and someone better touch his dick before he leaves them all on grounds of emotional cruelty

Needless to say, everyone :) has :) fun :)

A month later, Regina is aware that Something Is Not Right

Regina is very in tune with her body

She has to be, as it is the most important part of her job for everything to be in working order

Drumming is more than just wrists and arms, if she’s sick or her legs are hurting she won’t be able to play like she usually does

So when she begins to feel...different? 

She freaks out, goes to the doctor, and discovers that their passion filled night by the mediterranean blitzed their Planned Babies Only Decision 

Regina freaks and drives straight to Miami’s office because, well

there’s a huge giant possibility that this baby’s father is a married man (Ron)

Miami, who already dealt with the logistics of their relationship and potential baby the moment he found out they were together gives her a big hug

 (Regina is totally his favorite he would rather die than admit it but it’s true) 

And tells her that he’s already figured it all out and that she’ll be taken care of

Also, they were due for time in the studio anyways, so they can work on a new album until regina has the baby and then they’ll have the break before the tour

With the band all handled, Regina decides that all she has to do is tell the others 

She goes back to the doctor, gets her first scan, and then she comes home, puts the picture of the Bean in a frame, and hangs it on the wall

“There’s no way they won’t notice it,” Regina says, resting her hands on her hips and admiring her little miracle

FAMOUS LAST WORDS

It takes them three weeks

At first it was cute

Then it was annoying

By the third week she’s ready to take the baby herself and find another three people who are more observant

Desperate times call for desperate measures 

She asks Dom if the photos in the living room are crooked and he’s like, nope, they’re looking good, Reg!

She asks Johanna to help her dust, and sends her to take care of the pictures in the living room. She watches as Jo dusts for 15min, chattering away about the new album but not noticing a thing

She straight up asks Ron if he noticed the new frame in the living room and Ron was like, oh, no, but i’m sure it looks great!

She’s completely given up when Melina, Marc, Brianna, and Chris come to dinner

Dom and Brianna have commandeered the kitchen, working side by side to make a roast with lots of vegetarian options

(Dom keeps trying to hip check her away when she starts Touching The Meat because what does she know about a roast??? They are Delicate Cuts of Meat and You Cannot Disturb Them! No Brianna, it’s not too dry!!) 

Her and Jo are curled up next to each other the couch chatting with Marc and Ron about the upcoming album

While Melina and Chris stand around shooting the shit and drinking beers by their record player

It’s Chris who spots it first, just out of the corner of his eye

Regina was quite proud the way she set it up. It’s just the picture in the frame, but underneath she’s written

Condom Failed: Deacon-Taylor-Tetlaff-Beyrand Baby, Due Spring 1977

She had a bit of a giggle when she was writing it, but now, knowing that she’s involved with Three Idiots, she thinks it was more than just condom failure that led her here

So Chris sees it, and he immediately drops his beer bottle, reaching out to grab Melina’s arm tightly

“The fuck, Mullen,” Regina snaps, staring at the mess on her floor.

“Are you alright?” Johanna asks, standing up to check on him

Melina stares at him, then his arm, before looking at where he’s staring

She sees the picture, and lets out a scream of excitement, her hands covering her mouth 

“Holy fuck!” 

Brianna comes running out of the kitchen at the sound, Dom on her heels (after he checked to make sure the roast was okay)

Meanwhile, Chris is really trying not to blubber because he really just loves babies and well, CLEARLY this is why they invited them over!

(Dom just wanted an excuse to make a roast) (he’s very proud of his recipe) (So So So Proud)

“Oh my god, you guys, congratulations!” Chris cries, moving to pull Johanna into a hug

Because let’s face it, she was the last one pregnant, so it’s a safe bet!

He’s Wrong though

“Thank you...?” Johanna says, returning the hug and making a face at Brianna over his shoulder. 

Brianna shrugs

“I can’t believe it! This is so exciting, you must be so excited!” Melina shrieks, barely able to get the words out

Chris is still hugging Jo tight

He pulls back, staring at her in horror, then at the wine glass in her hand

The wine glass

That he filled

Twice

“Johanna!” he yelps, unaware that Regina is burrying her face in her hands while Johanna is Confused

“You can’t drink when you’re pregnant!” 

There is a long pause

Very long

Johanna stares him deadass in the eyes and takes a large sip

“I’m not,” she says, as dry as her Merlot

“Then who’s sonogram is on the wall?” Melina demands

“What sonogram?” Ron snorts turning to look at the wall. 

“God you’re so lucky you’re cute,” Regina drawls, still perched on the edge of the couch, sipping at her tonic-lime-mint-hold-the-vodka

Ron frowns

Johanna gasps

Dom freezes

“Regina,” Dom says, his voice fragile. “Regina, are you--?”

“Hi Papa.” she smirks before looking at the other three, “Daddy, Mummy. Took you long enough to notice.” 

Johanna, who has never once shrieked in her life, shrieks before pressing their mouths together, her thumbs brushing the apples of Regina’s cheeks, whispering, “I love you so much.” 

Ron jumps to his feet with a whoop, grabbing Regina so as to spin her around and around in circles before letting her go to yank Johanna into a kiss

“We’re having a baby!” he cheers

Dom rushes towards her, falling to his knees before Regina and buries his face into her stomach

There may be tears

“Hi, baby,” he whispers, “It’s your Papa.” 

Regina runs her fingers through his hair, smiling wetly at the other three

“I hope the baby gets my brains because otherwise they’re fucked,” she laughs. “That photo’s been up for three fucking weeks!” 

The three of them laugh and cry and kiss

Regina is passed around the rest of them, where they, too, press kisses to her cheeks and hands to the slight curve of her stomach

It’s not until the faint scent of smoke wafts to them do they remember why they were all together to begin with

“My roast!” Dom wails

(seven and a half months later, Regina cuddles her newborn daughter while the three stand around, all three ready to greet the newest member of their family)

("Im just saying she looks like a Tiger Lily,” Regina coos) 

(”Over my dead body,” Johanna says wetly. Picking her name has been the second biggest fight in their entire relationship. “She’s too perfect for that.”) 

(They name her Catherine)

(It isn’t until they bring her home to they realize their mistake) 

(”This is my daughter, Cat,” Regina smirks.) 

("Goddamnit,” Johanna hisses.)