#will probably look it up in my free time
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aachen404 · 5 months ago
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Am I the only one who isn't understanding this label discourse bullshit?
I keep seeing people trying to justify their hate against [insert label] because [insert more established label] people are uncomfortable and how it invalidates their spaces.
I do mean this in the nicest, politest, with the most worried-looking face I can muster: have you gone outside recently? Have you been to these so called queer spaces outside of online spaces?
I can assure you that besides the very few butthurt idiots, no one in their right mind will give a fuck how you choose to use the labels you happen to find. Most people will just not care that much because their label, as a fully personal thing, will mean different things for different people, and thus a different thing for them, than for you.
And if a label doesn't make sense to you, there's a very simple next step: ask the person about the label, and if you're not an ass about it, there's a good chance that they'll tell you.
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dorothywonderland · 2 months ago
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BRO LITERALLY DOXXED HIMSELF TO THE CYCLOPS. he was asking to get jumped come on
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hinamie · 5 months ago
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fire nation festival wear aka a blatant excuse for me to push atla clothing design conventions to the absolute Limit
jjk atla!au with @philosophiums
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todayisafridaynight · 8 months ago
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trensu · 3 months ago
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Guess who's baaaaack! It's me, I'm back to writing. My laptop when kaput back in May and I've only recently gotten a replacement. In celebration of this, here's more of stasis in darkness. Enjoy :)
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“Hello. I’ve wanted to meet you for years,” the god said. 
“Years? But, why would you want–? I’m–I’m no one, Lord.”
“Don’t say that.”
The god’s voice hadn’t gotten louder, yet his words carried a force that made the room tremble. The air became heavy with it. Wayne’s breathing grew haggard under the pressure of the words. Steve tossed out any idea of false privacy and crossed the room in a few steps to kneel at the other side of the bed. He took Wayne’s free hand to anchor him. Wayne didn’t so much as twitch in his direction but his knuckles went white as he gripped Steve’s hand.
“You gave me your spoils and your stories every night. I felt your love in every word you spoke to me. You’re the reason I’ve been able to exist this long. Wayne Munson, you are the most important person in the world to me."
Wayne let out a wordless cry. The hand in Steve's shook. Steve viscerally remembered how it felt to have the god’s attention like that for the first time. He also remembered how guilty the god sounded after he realized the effect he had on mortals. With a slight grimace, Steve discreetly nabbed the Lord of Night's attention. 
"I think that was a little too much," Steve suggested cautiously in a low tone barely audible over Wayne's sobs. "Maybe dial it back a little?"
The Lord of Night nodded abashedly. When he spoke again, the pressure in his speech noticeably lessened though the love in his words remained.
“So, you see, I needed to meet you in person. To thank you.”
The last part made Wayne weep louder. The grip he had on Steve’s hand increased in strength, and Steve was sort of relieved Wayne was an old man because even this frail, his hands were pretty damn strong. If he’d been any younger, Steve would’ve had bruises for sure. The god waited patiently as Wayne collected himself.
“My Lord, y-you–” Wayne gasped as his crying subsided. “I don’t deserve–”
“Wayne, you crazy old man, are you going to argue with your god?” the Lord of Night said in the same teasing tone he used with Steve all those nights in his pilgrimage. Wayne’s eyes widened.
“N-No! I’d never–!”
The god laughed, playful and bright as a star. Wayne halted his protests to stare in awe again. 
“You know, I usually encourage a bit of dissent but this time, I’m putting my foot down. You do deserve this, okay?”
Wayne nodded dazedly. He still watched the god with soft, warm eyes. His hand twitched in Steve’s as if he wanted to reach up to touch the god. Steve loosened his grip to allow it but Wayne didn’t follow through with the motion.
“...you remind me of someone,” Wayne whispered. The Lord of Night tilted his head curiously.
“Do I?” he asked. At Wayne’s nod, he added, “I hope it’s someone good. I know what people say about me these days, and let me tell you, it’s not super flattering. King of Darkness this and monster herder that, blah, blah, mean and scary, blah.”
“I know better than to pay any mind to hearsay,” Wayne replied. "I’ve found that most people are fools, my Lord." 
The Lord of Night laughed again. Wayne looked delighted. 
The rest of the night continued along the same line. The Lord of Night listened eagerly to Wayne’s every word as he reminisced about past heists and recalled fond childhood memories. Steve kept to himself, for the most part, letting the Lord of Night and his last believer bask in each other’s presence. Wayne stayed awake as long as he could but finally fell asleep as dawn approached. The Lord of Night began to fade as the first rays of the morning peeked through the bedroom window.
“Watch over him for me, please?” the Lord of Night asked Steve. “I’ll be back tonight.”
“Of course, Lord,” Steve replied. 
The sun broke past the horizon and the Lord of Night vanished. Steve took the stone from the bedside table. He wrapped it up carefully in cloth before returning it to his satchel. That level of care probably wasn’t necessary considering it was solid stone but it was the only thing they knew would keep the god tethered to this plane so far from his last shrine. Steve was charged with carrying his god's tether and he would not let him down by being careless with it.
It was also the only thing he had been given that belonged to his god. Typically, a holy warrior would be granted a symbol of their faith by a temple priest once a god had accepted the holy warrior’s offered service. Most of the time it would be a simple pendant or bracelet with a god’s sigil; a mass produced thing any follower could obtain, the only difference being that a holy warrior’s token would carry a particular blessing from the high priest. A holy warrior would carry that as a sign of their commitment until they’ve earned a more prestigious item to replace it during their years of service.
Steve’s journey so far has been as atypical as it could get. Most warriors traveled to their god's grandest temple. They recited that god's specific prayer for a holy warrior's offering, witnessed by a high priest who would then reveal whether the offering was accepted. Steve's god had no official prayers of any sort, much less temples or clergy. Steve's god couldn't really remember his own symbol aside from a vague outline of it; not nearly enough for it to be inscribed on even the simplest of tokens. 
Regardless, Steve wouldn't trade his experience for anything. Most holy warriors toiled for years, even decades, before getting a chance to meet their god. Steve met his god nearly at the beginning though he hadn't known it at the time. He'd been able to see him and speak to him. Steve’s humble offering of servitude had been accepted directly by his god rather than by priestly proxy. So what if his god wasn't able to grant him a token for his pledge? His presence was a privilege Steve would take over any boon.
It was a sentiment Steve knew Wayne understood. Steve scooted his chair closer to the bed where the old man lay sleeping. He wrapped a hand around Wayne's wrist to track his weak pulse, and settled in for his vigil.
Steve woke Wayne a handful of times to make sure he drank some water or ate some of the vegetable soup Steve had thrown together using whatever he’d picked from the garden the day before. They chatted for a while; Wayne telling Steve about his life before age and sickness caught up to him. Eventually, Steve was able to coax him back to sleep when it became obvious his energy was fading.
At some point in the day, Wayne’s temperature began to rise. Nothing worrisome yet, but dread trickled into Steve’s veins regardless. The old man had been fighting whatever ailed him for a while now. If a fever overcame him, Steve doubted Wayne would survive it.
When the Lord of Night appeared alongside the fading sunset, he seemed as worried as Steve. Wayne sat in bed, propped up by pillows Steve had strategically placed. His eyes were rheumy but steady.
“You’ve seen the Door already, haven’t you?” the Lord of Night asked Wayne dejectedly.
Wayne’s gaze strayed from the god. He glanced at the corner opposite of the bedroom door. His hands shook as he tried to point that direction. Steve didn't see any door there. The god took Wayne's hand between his own, tangible to his last believer even as he appeared more translucent than the night before.
“It showed up earlier today,” Wayne whispered. The god nodded.
“You don’t have to answer yet, but soon. Once you go through the Door, you’ll be in Death's domain. No god is allowed to enter there besides him. I would have lost my chance to meet you if we’d been delayed any longer.”
“Good thing you have Ser Steve. He got you here real quick from what he told me,” Wayne said with a crooked smile.
“Has he been talking himself up?” the god asked amusedly. “Trying to impress the boss?”
“It’s my first quest,” Steve butted in with mild exasperation borne of embarrassment. He hadn’t expected Wayne to mention him at all during his communion with the Lord of Night. “I have to make a good impression.”
“To make up for the first impression, huh?” the Lord of Night teased. 
Oh no, Steve thought when he caught Wayne’s curious look. He wanted to hide his face in his hands. That would be childish. Steve was a man so he was above that, unfortunately.
���Wayne,” the Lord of Night said with palpable mischief. “In exchange for all the stories you’ve given me these many years, what if I told you how I got my very first holy warrior?”
“I didn’t know better,” Steve groaned weakly in an effort to stop the story before it began in earnest. The Lord of Night made a shushing motion in his direction. 
“It would be a privilege, Lord,” Wayne said with matching mischief.
“Settle in, my loyal follower, and listen closely,” the Lord of Night began with exuberance. “I call this tale The Trial of Nine Nights.”
The rest of the night, the god recounted Steve’s pilgrimage. The way he told it painted Steve as some sort of gallant hero. It was suspenseful and whimsical. It didn’t sound like Steve’s experience at all. Yet every word was true, told with a flair that Steve himself would never have imagined. Wayne had hung on his god’s every word, despite the sporadic interruptions caused by coughing fits.
“The way you tell stories…” Wayne said faintly between coughs as the story wound to an end. “You…really do remind me of…someone. My little starmaker*. He was…” His voice trailed off weakly as he tried to catch his breath again.
“Rest now. Tell me about him tonight, Wayne,” the Lord of Night commanded as he disappeared with the arrival of dawn.
Wayne’s temperature seemed to climb with the sun. Steve did what he could to help. He stripped the bed of blankets and draped cold, damp towels over Wayne’s brow. More than once Wayne had asked Steve to answer the door.
“Someone’s knocking,” Wayne insisted.
“I’ve checked already,” Steve lied. He hadn’t heard a single knock all day, much less one coming from the very door-less spot Wayne kept indicating. “No one’s there.”
Wayne drifted in and out of a restless slumber. Despite Steve’s efforts, the fever had not lowered by nightfall. The Lord of Night paced at the foot of Wayne’s bed with a caged restlessness. Wayne had yet to wake up. 
“I don’t think he’s going to make it. Can you do anything for him?” Steve asked, hesitantly. “You came here to help him, didn’t you?”
“No,” the Lord of Night said shortly. “I can’t. I’m not a god of medicine. I’m not a healer.”
Each word was said with increasingly helpless frustration.
“I’m not strong enough to calm his dreams. I can’t ease his pain,” the Lord of Night said angrily. “At this rate, I won’t even be able to apologize to him.”
“Apologize for what?” Steve asked incredulously. Steve’s question went unheard. The Lord of Night tugged at his hood as if trying to hide his not-face. He gave up his pacing and slumped defeatedly on the chair beside Wayne’s bed.
“His family has sustained me for so long. He’s so devoted to me, and I keep failing him,” the god said, voice thick with shame. The brooding silence that followed was unlike the Lord of Night’s usual demeanor.
Steve wanted to protest the god’s claim. He was tempted to ask why the god believed he’d failed his last follower. Steve had seen people who’ve scorned and rejected their gods for a multitude of reasons. Wayne had not behaved like any of those people. Wayne had been so happy to see the god, Steve couldn’t imagine Wayne wanting an apology of any sort.
Before Steve could steel himself to ask, Wayne finally stirred awake.The Lord of Night straightened and drew the chair closer to his last follower. Steve situated himself near the corner Wayne had claimed to see a door. There wasn’t anything Steve could realistically achieve by placing himself between Wayne and the unseen door. When Death’s Door knocked, there was nothing a mortal being could do to keep it from opening. Regardless, Steve hoped he could provide some semblance of comfort by standing guard. 
Wayne’s eyes were glassy. He lay limp and disoriented, making not a sound outside his labored breathing. Neither the Lord of Night nor Steve spoke. Steve didn’t want to startle the man nor bring his attention to the unseen door. After a few minutes, Wayne finally noticed his bedside companion. 
“You,” he croaked in a daze. “I know you.”
“Yeah, it’s me.” The somber tone went unnoticed by Wayne whose entire face brightened with an unexpected joy. 
“Eddie,” Wayne said shakily. 
“What?”
“Eddie, you’re here,” Wayne said with more love and joy than Steve had ever heard from another person. He felt a momentary flash of envy that someone could hold another so dear, before it hit him that Wayne was speaking to the Lord of Night. The god seemed as dumbstruck as Steve over it.
“Is…is that me?” the Lord of Night asked. The god sounded so young and lost. It reminded Steve of Dustin and his friends when they were small. It inspired all the same protective instincts.
“‘course it’s you, Eddie,” Wayne said fondly. 
“Eddie,” the Lord of Night whispered. “Oh, it is. It is me. I’m here.” 
The words rang through the air. The finality in them nearly deafened Steve. The words were a realization that shifted the entire cosmos. The air he breathed, the light he saw, the very world he perceived had changed fundamentally. It was a change so loud and obvious, Steve was certain every human left on earth and everyone beyond the Door knew it happened. Yet between one blink and the next, the world remained the same as it ever was. Everything that had been still was and would continue to be for as long as the stars burn.
Inexplicably, Steve experienced a bout of vertigo at the shift that had and hadn’t happened. He fought back a wave of nausea that accompanied it.
“Eddie,” Wayne rasped over the rattling of his weak lungs. No longer translucent, the god appeared solid and real in a way he hadn’t even at the shrine where Steve first encountered him. Wayne’s wrinkled hand reached out to gently cup the Lord of Night’s cheek.
"Hey, Uncle Wayne," the Lord of Night said with a new voice. 
"My starmaker, I missed you. So much. But how're you here? You were gone, you di–"
"We didn't want you to be alone," Eddie, Lord of Night, responded thickly, leaning into the hand and covering it with his own.  "We wanted to thank you for taking care of us all these years."
"Don’t,” Wayne wheezed, teary. “I’m sorry. I’m sorry, Eddie. You deserved so much more than your pa or me ever gave you."
"No! No, Uncle Wayne, don't apologize," he said earnestly. "You were perfect. You gave us a home when pa died. We were so little and you protected us. You loved us. That's all we ever wanted."
“Oh, Eddie,” Wayne said in a heartbroken rasp. “That damn door’s been knocking all day. Who'll take care of you when I'm gone, Eddie?" 
"Don't you worry about that, Uncle Wayne. Steve's gonna look after me.”
“Are you sure?”
The Lord of Night took off his hood and turned back to look at Steve for the first time since he sat himself at Wayne’s side. All the air left Steve’s lungs in one fell swoop. His god had a face.
His god was beautiful.
The Lord of Night’s skin remained pale, providing a stark contrast to his large, dark brown eyes glittered with bittersweet joy and sorrow. His lips, full and a soft shade of pink, were pulled into a wide, mischievous grin that dimpled his cheeks. His dark eyebrows were almost hidden under wild curls. His hair draped over the slope of his shoulders and matched his eyes wonderfully.
Steve willed himself to stay steadfast and strong under the god’s gaze. The Lord of Night’s grin twisted a bit as if he wasn't entirely pleased by what he saw. The nausea from before came back because Steve knew what people looked like when he'd disappointed them. As usual, he had no idea what he'd done wrong.
“Yeah, I’m sure. He already promised,” Eddie, the Lord of Night, said. He turned back to Wayne and gently wiped the sweat off the old man's brow. 
“Good,” Wayne said with a. “You need someone takin’ care of you, the way you get in trouble all the time.”
“We weren’t that bad,” Eddie said with a watery smile. After a pause, Eddie continued reluctantly. “Uncle Wayne, if you need to answer the Door, you can. I won’t be alone.”
“Yeah,” Wayne murmured. “I’m tired, Eddie.”
“You won’t be for long, I promise, just answer the Door.”
Wayne’s breathing slowed. His eyes drooped closed. Eddie clung to his hand until it went lax. A choked sound escaped him when Wayne’s breathing stopped. Steve instinctively stepped forward to comfort him but Eddie abruptly stood up, sending the chair clattering to the floor. He whirled around and stumbled towards the empty space Steve left behind. 
“You better take care of him. Wayne is a good man, he’s earned–” Eddie said to…the wall? But stopped and reeled back. His mouth curved down in a scowl. Eddie’s eyes were dark and glowering as he stared at something there that Steve himself could not see.
“Oh, fuck you, I know I can’t do anything to you but–”
Eddie stopped again. He looked like he wanted to punch something. Or someone?
“I just want to know that he’ll be happy and saf–hey, asshole, I’m still talking you, don’t you dare– FUCK,” Eddie shouted at nothing. He panted in anger. Steve cleared his throat.
“My Lord?”
“I forgot how much of a dick he is. It’s not like I was asking for details! I don’t fucking care what’s past his stupid Door. It’s not a crime to want your family to, like, go somewhere good after. He could’ve just said yes or no!” Eddie ranted.
“My Lord, I don’t know what you’re talking about!”
“Oh,” Eddie paused. “Right. You wouldn’t. And you shouldn’t. Not yet. Not for a long time, hopefully.”
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*starmaker - so this is a reference to some lore i dropped in the previous scene during some edits I made after I had posted it on tumblr. basically, the legend explains why bedtime stories are a thing and that the lord of night creates a star for every story that impresses him. a really good book or author will get called a starmaker, though to the general population it's just a thing people say to denote greatness in stories without context of where the saying came from.
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and now we're all caught up with what i've written so far, wow! but don't worry, i still have plenty more to write, stay tuned.
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daisybell-on-a-carousel · 1 month ago
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Still very wild to me when people try to gotcha Jason with the whole "if you can kill other people for being evil why can't they kill you" when jason is like. One of the most passively suicidal characters I've ever seen. What if man
#augh i dont want to cw this because im just talking about The Character and i feel bad when i do it for characters but i probably should#suicide mention#ask to tag#while im here i do absolutely believe hes been suicidal since jaybin times. maybe even before just in different ways. but like#going into that building with shelia? yeah#now. i DONT think he was aware of it and if youd ask him hed say no fully believing thats the truth#but like if a ghost jaybin had some introspection time i think he'd maybe eventually be like yeah#his outcomes to him were have a loving parent or die and hes a very big fan of ultimatums like that.#but he doesn't fully see it like that as jaybin because oh hes a hero and saving others when no one else can is what heros do :)#ramble. ivee been feeling it lately yknow how it is#ive once saw a post saying jason was planning to die after the joker was dead in utrh and yeagh i can see that#he puts A BOMB in his HELMET#suicidal characters in the context of hero stories are so fascinating to me. the self sacrifice.#the not caring about your own safety as long as you save someone else. the pushing yourself#the way itd be so easy to make it look like they just fell in battle. to be considered a hero in the end#anyway ive been glancing at suicidal jason todd fics. how bad is it that im still getting mad about characterization#because theyre not killing him right#AND ANOTHER THING. since im here and i try to avoid making posts about The Character like this so might as welk get it all out#think about suicidal jaybin as well as the fact 80s bruce very much considered suicidal people/people attempting like#weak and lazy? yells at them? i think thats about it. Very Much. je seems to straight up just hate them#again very much feel free to ask me to tag this one ^-^'#and i hope no one thinks im being callous here im very worried about that. i just its a very important part of his character to think about#and its fun to explore as someone who is passively suicidal myself#jason todd analysis#anyway no one look at me i am in my corner just rotating him#WAIT to clarify i dont think jaybin fully realized Just becauceof the heros sacrifice thing. i made it sound like that i believe#anyway. if you read him as suicidal since jaybin times and go to ditf with that lens like i did. well. the post death victim blaming..
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agenderdeddie · 1 month ago
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cookkoo · 1 year ago
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Drawtober 2023 day 2: Spider (lily)
Day1
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itslilacmoon · 2 months ago
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Eavesdropping
(timelapse + notes under the cut)
soo this was actually meant to be part of a comic but i wound up just illustrating this part on its own and had a blast trying out a new lineart style and coloring all the dramatic lighting. the comic was about amity willow and gus talking about staging some kind of intervention for luz and hunter bc of their Concerning Behavior, meaninwhile cut to luz and hunter had been having a fun chat on the roof about how shitty they feel, who have now been interuppted and are awkwardly listening in. wonderful times. anyways i actually dont hate this piece shocker. lets hope it doesnt look super weird after i post <3
also im trying out smthn new and posting my timelapses! a sneak peak into my weirdass art process! i couldn’t figure out which style i wanted this piece in hence the weird back and forth at the beginning lol
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fatedroses · 2 months ago
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Local Garlean Adventurer gets the first head kisses he's had within the last decade, is content.
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...Even if he has to fold himself in half for them.
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littlehatmouse · 6 months ago
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lots of doodles because i forget to post art here most of the time
#lila art#genshin#clorinde#shenhe#kokomi#not tagging arlecchino because that does Not count as an arlecchino drawing LMFAO#He Knows Many Things.#dunmeshi#falin touden#laios touden#sorry that that siblings drawing is so blurry im too lazy to retake it#it has the lyrics to the siblings song below it bc i got it stuck in my head while drawing them#siblings! siblings! siblings! siblings! this is my sister! this is my brother! we are siblings and we care for each other! what we have! we#always share! cuz we are siblings and we have the same hair!!! dun dundun dun dun dun dun dun dundundundundun dun dun dundundun#im actually. rlly proud of those falin drawings on top#and also the clorinde one but i just drew that an hr ago so im probably going to come back to it tmrw and realize its super wonky but wtv#also the kokomi was a request from twt!!!!!#i have. a lot of those to do still#i will do them at some point i just dont have free time a lot#this is the first time ive had to draw in like two weeks i think#and my friends birthday passed and i promised to draw him hkvh so thats my priority#the clorinde was just supposed to be a warmuo#except he called me while i was drawing and we ended up playing sdv#so it was a warmup to nothing#anyway i had fun and i need to go to bed now bye#ALSO i forgot to mention that those shenhe perspectives are meant to look ugly i was trying to draw those perspectives from memory#because i was. in class.#the top down perspective is kindof cute tbh but the Other One.#its ok i love making my faves look dumb and uncomfortable on purpose
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ferronickel · 4 months ago
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Thinking bout the time someone yelled at me because they didn't understand butches.
#feeling some kind of way about telling queer stories lately#and what makes something “queer enough”#which. in my opinion is that any story I tell is queer enough because I am a queer person telling stories about queer characters#but there are always going to be people who call that into question if boys arent kissing boys and girls arent kissing girls#in easy uncomplicated ways#looking glasses is meant to be messy#everyone is at turning points in their lives. they're young adults whose identities and relatio ships aren't fully formed yet#but those complications (in my opinion) are what make the story queer#what are dess's pronouns? she/her but only because she hasnt had a chance to think about anything else#when an overbearing mother got her daughter back after they were missing for years#she might have a hard time adjusting to her child maybe not being her “daughter”#which is queerer: two women getting together or breaking up?#i dont think it matters#but I find these in between spaces interesting to explore#and it's my story that I'm doing for free#so even if dess looks too much like a man#i dont owe it to anybody to conform my story to someone else's expectations#(long ramble that probably isnt very coherent)#(i've just been thinking about some of this stuff lately. and this is the funniest response I've ever gotten to the comic)#(like yeah. she is a girl. good job!)#(i dont often get hate on the comic (which I'm glad for) so whenever I do I find the types of hate really fascinating)#(and dont worry. I got this months ago. I've just been thinking about it again recently and laughing)#nickel for my thoughts
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spurgie-cousin · 6 months ago
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sorry I've been slacking on fundie content lately, I recently learned that a Welsh prince came to the Americas in the 1100s with a few hundred people and that his descendants might be the real life explanation for a few midwest/southern/appalachian folk legends (well it was native history that white people wrote off as folk legends) and that the Smithsonian might've been complicit in hiding this information so. that's been taking up a lot of my time
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itspileofgoodthings · 8 days ago
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remember when you hit the brakes too soon! twenty stitches in a hospital room! when you started crying baby I did too! but when the sun came up I was looking at you!
#remember when we couldn’t take the heat#I walked out said I’m setting you free#but the monsters turned out to be! just! trees!#when the sun came up you were looking at me!!!!#oh you were looking at me#😭♥️😭😭😭😭😭#do you ever think about how moments of connection in Taylor songs is so rare#just. that moment when the beloved is looking back AT her —it almost never happens#and when it does she’s so quick to write it down and hold on to it forever#locked in her steel-trap memory#you almost ran the red cause you were looking over at me#I am always thinking about Ann Powers saying that a Taylor song is just Taylor alone with a man creating the world of the Moment#whatever it is#and most of the time it’s profoundly lonely#the thing Taylor does NOT have (I believe) are friendships that go to the core#that are personal and individual —where she is Seen and Loved#and so she’s still looking for it in romance and mostly not finding it 😭#but man there is something so poignant about Taylor writing from and filling in the silences of a space so many women find themselves in#alone with a man who won’t look at them#I have never been there and venture to predict I never will be#but Taylor has lived most of her adult life there#and then the other half doing the work of transcribing it#shakes me to my CORE#anyways to circle back for a second—out of the woods HAS the moment of connection#and it feels as raw and vulnerable and simple as it probably was#like. for a second we really are just in the hospital room with them#when she says—when you started crying baby I did too I can SEE her just standing there#all nearly 6 feet of her probably in her little ski outfit tears streaming down her face!#but it’s still a point of connection because he’s looking back at her in that moment#I have made myself cry
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suddencolds · 4 months ago
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.~
#not a vent just a journal entry (feel free to scroll past; there is no snz here and this is also not that interesting)#realizing now that i never thought of myself as#someone whose absence would register to others in any other way than just neutral/detached recognition?#phrasing this really badly and i am truly going to delete this later bc it is embarrassing LOL#i think when i was young and posting all this fic into questionable places (the f*rum) i was like#(@ an unfinished work of mine) no way anyone could be bothered by these cliffhangers 👍 they can just imagine the ending#even though i would frequently be bothered by other people's cliffhangers. that exact same principle just wouldn't apply to me in my head#and when i did not respond to people i was like.. i'm sure i wasn't really an important part of their lives so they won't mind it#if i stepped away?#i never really entertained the concept of people missing me or looking forward to my responses 😭 i never thought of myself as someone worth#missing... so when i disappeared it was always with little to no sense of guilt. i think even now i struggle with#seeing myself as someone that inhabits like a tangible enough space in other people's lives that my absence would be felt#(and i don't mean that in a morbid way. and i do recognize that it's quite hypocritical)#on the flipside of things i frequently miss people and look forward to their responses. and sometimes i wonder like#do they all know? do they all know that i miss them because they somehow understand this aspect of human nature better than i do?#or are they in the dark like i am? are these things assumed or are they only known when they are said... 😭#i am a little bit of a coward so i am not saying anything (also because can you even say this kind of thing to someone??#i would probably die of embarrassment) but#how strange it is to have someone suddenly inhabit a space in your life that is substantial enough that#when they're gone you feel that space open up and you miss them#the few times in my life people have conveyed that sentiment to me i remember feeling puzzled that my presence could have that kind of#weight to them. i think my problem is that i purposefully do not read between the lines if the conclusion is something favorable towards me#because i don't want to bank on something good that might or might not be true 😭 anyways this is way too long already. if you read this#then good morning or goodnight
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stevieharringtonwifeguy · 1 year ago
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post apocalypse au where the plot of stranger things doesn't happen but vecna still tears the world open and brings the upside down right side up. and the scattered people who managed to survive the initial earthquakes and power outages and complete breakdown of society have to contend not only with creatures from the upside down trying to eat them, but also with what the bleeding of an alternate dimension into their reality is doing to their bodies
people with prolonged exposure to larger tears seem to be slowly changed into something else, like some radioactivity from the dimension is mutating them. people grow claws, or leathery wings, or their face peels open, or they turn into unrecognisable piles of eldritch goo. there's vampires, were-demogorgons, flayed, weird ghosts, and the number of super powered people like el was in the show skyrockets
other people who manage avoid this fate shun those that fell to it. and to an extent it's reasonable, some people who get changed in this way completely lose their humanity, like the flayed, and while others retain it it probably doesn't seem that way when a vampire-like person needs human blood to survive. but a lot of people are just as terrified of the changes happening to them as other people are, and while they may not be harmless, they'd much rather use their new biological advantages to keep people safe
despite this, people that have been 'corroded' by the upside down are ostracised, feared, sometimes outright hunted by regular humans. so sometimes, they band together. form their own little apocalypse groups
eddie is in one of those groups. he wouldn't say he's the leader, bc they don't really have a hierarchical structure and eddie likes to think he's managed to maintain his anarchic ideals even in the face of the apocalypse. but he is the oldest, and the most scary looking (if not the most actually dangerous), so the combination of everyone being younger and his ability to scare off corroded-hunters that come looking for them means everyone else kind of follows his lead
so no one really questions when he comes back to camp one day holding two passed out humans. a mole-dotted man and a freckled woman, probably about eddie's age, who were injured and had crawled into a ruin building to die. and like. what was eddie supposed to do, leave them there??? no, gareth, it has nothing to do with how pretty the guy is. no, eddie doesn't know how they'll react when they wake up in the middle of a corroded camp, they'll cross that bridge when they get there. el says she senses that they're good people, so clearly everything will be fine actually!!!!!
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