#why’s being a human so complicated

[justforthesakeofme]

have faith in yourself but not too much faith because that makes you bad

[tofixtheshadows]

So I've been thinking lately about how Mithrun is Kabru's dark mirror (more on that another time- it needs its own post), and I thought it interesting that one of their parallels is that they were both cared for by Milsiril, but in opposite directions. She took Kabru in as her foster after he was orphaned and tried to convince him not to become an adventurer. On the flip side, she helped rehabilitate Mithrun specifically so that he could rejoin the Canaries.

And I kept wondering: why?

For Kabru, obviously she loves him a whole lot- despite any other shortcomings in their relationship, I do believe that.

So I get why she tries to convince him not to go dungeoning, and, failing that, at least prepares him as thoroughly as she can.

But why help Mithrun? She used to hate Mithrun, but after realizing what a secretly twisted person he was, she actually thought of him more positively (oh, Milsiril). So it wasn't as if she held the kind of grudge that might motivate her to make his already-depleted life even more miserable by sending him back to the dungeons. And it wasn't that she felt bad for him either, since she didn't visit Mithrun for the first ~20 years of his recovery.

The Adventurer's Bible says that Utaya was the impetus for Mithrun returning to the Canaries, but Milsiril is the one who made the trip to see him and tell him about it.

Why would Milsiril work so hard to get her old coworker back into fighting fit? Why encourage him to return to such a dangerous lifestyle, when she was the one who chose not to mercy-kill him?

That last panel is such a crazy thing to hint at and then never elaborate on. Without it we could have just thought that Milsiril wanted the Canaries' work to continue without her, even if it seemed out of character. I think some people even assume she's just a natural caretaker as a foster mom and handwave it to include nursing Mithrun too. What could Milsiril's suspicious motives be? What does she gain from Mithrun joining the Canaries that isn't an altruistic desire to see dungeons safely sealed? Feeling a sense of responsibility for the work she left behind isn't an ulterior motive.

My theory is: Milsiril, knowing that Mithrun was empty save for the burning desire to face the demon again, wound him up like a clockwork doll and pointed him back at the dungeons.

Hoping that he'd eliminate the biggest threat to Kabru's life, before it was too late for him.

Milsiril the puppetmaster.

[puppetmaster13u]

Prompt 310

Shadow core Danny? Shadow core Danny with Hazmat AU? Indeed, with a hint of a twist. 

See that hazmat helmet beneath the hood? Yeah that’s erm, that might be his actual face now. It might be able to split open into a proper maw, as he found out during one of the early fights. He thinks it might be a shadow-core thing though, because Fright Knight has something similar, along with the Keeper. Who's apparently a ghost that keeps track of other shadow-ghosts, which, cool. Cool library covered in flesh, nothing spooky there. 

He mentions this? Because apparently even if all ghosts partially feed on emotions, shadow cores need Fear the most. Which, thankfully shadow cores are apparently more rare than he’d expect, so he’s not going to go into a territorial frenzy or something on a bad day, yay! 

But uh, he might… count as a ghostling since he’s only a year dead- in fact he’ll continue to be as such until he’s at least 100 years dead, since he didn’t die as an adult. Which in turn… means he needs even more fear, at least until he’s old enough to generate it on his own. 

So what’s a ghostling to do? Take a trip to one of the most fear-soaked cities in the world, y’know, just a little weekend trip every month. Gotham isn’t that bad, and he can stay invisible- mostly! What’s going to happen, he run into a vigilante? Ha… oh no.

[toytulini]

man the thing about beauty standards and being ugly and being pretty and being insecure is that ultimately you do just kinda have to Decide that youre pretty. like ultimately thats how you become pretty, or hot, or sexy. you have to just Decide that you Are. you have to recognize that its made up, its arbitrary, its subjective, and that people might disagree with you about it, and as much as you are able, you need to completely and utterly disregard their opinions on your appearance, and decide that youre pretty now. and THEN.

you need to find beauty in "ugly". you need to recognize that ugly is made up, that its arbitrary, that its subjective, and you need to be able to find the beauty in it all. and this means you cant bodyshame people. you cant body shame shitty celebs or politicians. you need to base your criticisms on the substance of their character and misdeeds and unhinged horrific opinions and not give a shit about what they look like. you cant go calling people ugly for being shitty. you cant go calling people ugly for looking A Way You Dont Like.

and then if you wanna really galaxy brain this shit you start using ugly as endearment. OBVIOUSLY do not fucking call other human beings ugly. that shit is far too loaded, its just Rude. Dont call specific features of people or even characters ugly cos thats also too loaded. as a term it has baggage. but you can see the ugly in tacky, loud, garish clothing, and it can be Good. you can see the ugly in a distinctive, horrible tiny car from the 90s, and it can be good. you can see the ugly in animals that have evolved to look the way they do, without a single thought of what humans find appealing. you can see the beauty and the freedom in "Ugliness". you can break out of this shit altogether and feel nothing but disdain for anyone who stoops to insulting your appearance if they disagree with you about shit. you can get completely out of the cave of these beauty standards. you can find it so freeing to revel.in letting yourself be ugly. in recognizing that the way you look and exist might be ugly to some people, and youre out of the cave enough to simply recognize. thats just your opinion and it doesnt matter. didnt ask.

you can look at ppl arguing about the correct amount of skincare products to use daily, the Correct Amount of makeup, and whether or not its radical to conform to beauty standards or defy them and argue about is it really conforming if visible makeup pisses men off, and you can say, well I dont care about any of that, I recognize the societal pressures of flawless skin and all that but you see,

I just want to look like a silly little clown :o3

[superloves4]

Sooooo, the first three episodes have not yet changed my mind on the rings of power show

[irisbaggins]

The novelisation of the Phantom Menace has made me so incredibly sad, where little Anakin sees an injured Tusken and decides to disobey Watto to sit by the Raider until he wakes up. Anakin has such a deep, loving heart that he was willing to suffer the consequences of disobedience to make sure a Tusken Raider would be safe, a being he was taught all his life were brutal and cruel. And in this chapter, Anakin admits that the only thing that truly scares him, is of losing his mother. That juxtaposition, that note of I will care for this creature to I fear losing my mother, put so much more weight onto AOTC, and of Anakin's rage. He broke, and he lost himself to his rage. When faced with what he did, he rages against the world and his actions, before breaking down into further sobs at the loss of his mother and the actions he made. His worst fear was realised, and he became the monster that everyone claimed the Tuskens to be.

It'll be interesting to read the AOTC novelisation, to see if this scene is ever called back to. I just find it interesting, and further showcases the depths of Anakin's feelings and compassion, as well as the pitfalls that such strong emotions come with. For if you feel compassion and love as deeply as Anakin does, so will you feel the destructive nature of all of your rage. And that, that is Anakin's biggest weakness; he feels too strongly to ever truly control it.

[bittersweetresilience]

for the ship ask game...

feligami 🦚🐉

HI SELKIE 💘💓💗 let’s go into my room and sit on my bed. i have snacks 🥰

What made you ship it?

i didn’t ship feligami until very recently, since i have strong feelings about arocoded félix, but while i was making amvs i saw how many times they held hands and my heart was swayed.

What are your favorite things about the ship?

i don’t ship it enough to have an answer for this question 🤣 get nina in here. nina has essays on essays about queerness and abuse recovery. i suppose my answer is the hand holding.

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

i have strong feelings about this one too. they would not have kids ‼️ they would not get married ‼️ down with the nuclear family ‼️

(ship ask game)

[astralarias]

To be honest it does kinda upset me sometimes that I can’t work. and I’m only now accepting that I can’t and I’m not just “lazy”, I do have actual Problems. I don’t want to work for working’s sake, I don’t think anyone should Have To work to be valuable, people just are and I know that applies to me too. But I want to do something fulfilling with my life, I’ve always wanted to help animals and work with them. and I want independence, fully, to be my own person. But I feel I am so lacking in all the ways people are people, because of how my childhood was, endless trauma and emotional neglect. I feel like a half-formed person who will never be able to fill that hole in me and Be a human. I’m scared.

[euphor1a]

Hi friends, hope you all are doing well ^^

My apologies for being ia, I kind of spent a whole month of vacation doing the bare minimum to survive🧍🏽‍♀️; sadly today is the last day of the said vacation and the reality of everything I’ve been ignoring has hit me like a ton of bricks xD

That being said, I’ll slowly try to come back here! I also wanted to ask for blog recommendations to follow ^^ if you have any~ I’m pretty multi-fandom so I wouldn’t mind as long as I have a fandom in common! (And yes, you can recommend yourself)

Thank you, I hope you’ve been kind to yourself 💕

— aleyna 💌

[dangerousdan-dan]

Just when I'm trying to be more social again, something will happen that reminds me why I'm a hermit

[aroceu]

shame is the self killer shame is the authenticity killer shame hides the honesty of your art and the beauty of your own individual uniqueness and voice and thoughts. without embracing the parts of you that people might think are annoying or imperfect or cringe the road to self acceptance and inner peace and lasting happiness will continue to stay that much harder

[ballpower981]

I am human, and I think that’s so fascinating. I’m this sentient made up of muscle, fat, bone, cartilage, blood, and so much more, all controlled by a conscience, the only thing separating me from a rock, or a feather.

I’m made up of so many cells and atoms and nerves that would take millions of lifetimes to count. But just because I’m so complex doesn’t mean I’m perfect. I’m far from it, actually.

Human beings are imperfect on principle. We’re messy, to put it simply. We have messy feelings, emotions, thoughts, actions. Hell, there’s not a single thing on earth that is perfect because humans are so messy. It’s subjective.

The human body isn’t perfect at all. If you slot your fingers together, they don’t all align perfectly, do they? Sure, there are a few rules when it comes to anatomy, like the structure of one’s face, or the length of your foot being the same as your forearm, but that’s all because of genetic patterns.

If you add blue to blue, you just get blue. If you add one person with “right” proportions to another person with “right” proportions, you get a kid with “right” proportions.

Even when there is a variation, chances are, if you look back into the gene pool (which is so complex that I don’t even have the TIME to type out), you’ll find that same variation. And when the variation is out of nowhere, it’s still always for a super complicated reason.

Humans are so messy and complex and interesting, that seeing people dumb ourselves down to a “bag of flesh and bones” is almost offensive. We’re so much more. Physically and emotionally.

We have sentience, we’re mortal, we’re conscious. Those things are the only thing that separates us from cats, gods, or objects. We have the ability to create and have ideas.

And the crazy thing is, despite there being +8billion people on earth, not a single one of us is the same as another. Some of us may share faces, but our consciousness is purely ours. No two people are the exact same.

I love being human, even when I hate it, because that means I have the ability, the sentience to hate. To love. And I love being human.

[wheelercore]

Constantly thinking abour karen wheeler btw but in a way that makes everyone here super madsies

[bakafurai]

WARGH SONA REF..... because I couldn't bring myself to actually get rid of my past ones haha....... i like robots can you tell???

[lususnatura]

🎤 🎤 🎤

a song that i associate with my muse meme!

AHH, hey, ramone!! thank you for sending in this prompt :D since you sent in three of the mic's, i shall now be treating you to three songs that make me think of blamore when i hear them / that i associate with it. an explanation of why i chose them will be in the tags <3

hozier - who we are.

icehouse - crazy.

depeche mode - personal jesus.

[shallowseeker]

The irrationality of awakened feelings

Theory: The Empty is little bit in love with Cas.

When The Empty took on Cas's "little thoughts," it became something. It ALSO a la Amara, got a weird connection to Cas.

It...."felt everything that you feel."

And now? The Empty is tormented by its own awakened feelings, and it cannot sleep.

At some points, it knows perhaps that it may be in love with him, but it's ANGRY about that. (Whereas Amara "would never hurt Dean," all the Shadow wants to do is hurt Castiel.)

///

That's ALSO why it took on Meg's face in the end. (It's cognizant of its own emotions that it's jealous. Jealous enough that it doesn't want to try to BE Dean.)

Because, reasons.

It wants to be an Individual, and well. Meg took on the face and name of another, and The Empty resonated with that aspect.

It doesn't know what to do with It all.

It doesn't know how to be an individual or parse those emotions.

So, it covets. It rages.