#why? i literally have no idea i just got scared. one of the nurses had to come in and hold my hand for the rest of the infusion lmfao

[mymarifae]

sometimes i think about the fact that people do ketamine like, for fun. that's crazy to me. i used to get ketamine infusions and that was barely any ketamine at all and i was fighting for my fucking life

[raginglesbian2006]

Who's a good boy?

Lucifer x reader

A/N: I've wanted to write a romantic scenario for my second best boi (first is Alastor, obvi) so here we go. Look at how cute he is :3

It was another day in hell, just as hellish as the day before. You couldn't complain though, having found a home at the Hazbin Hotel.

You were there at its doorstep the day the princess of hell proposed her idea on the news. Despite its bad reception, you knew you had to go visit. You had no clue why you were in hell in the first place, having made sure you were good when you were alive. So, a place in hell that was made for redemption and a chance to go to heaven meant the world to you.

Being in hell helped you get used to the manipulative and cruel sinners that walked down the streets like they hadn't just killed off a bunch of people two seconds ago.

Even though Charlie was an exception when it came to the people you'd usually meet, you hadn't expected her dad, the literal king of hell, to be such a sweetheart.

⊰──── 《∘◦♡◦∘》 ────⊰

You were with the other residents of the hotel, decorating the place the moment Vaggie got on your asses about making the best first impression for Lucifer's arrival.

You had been tasked with baking cookies. Given your affinity for the culinary world when you were alive, you started on your task right away. You pulled out the glazed soft apple cookies, your favorite, from the oven and left it on the kitchen table to rest. You stood there guarding the dish, just in case Niffty tried to take some for herself.(She did but you held her back pretty easily).

"Ok guys, it's showtime!" Charlie yelled suddenly. You rushed to the hotel lobby with your tray of cookies and stood there with the others. You wished you had more time to tidy up but your flour-caked hair and apron would have to do.

Charlie opened the door to reveal a short pale man with a ridiculously large hat. That...was Lucifer?

"CHARLIE!" the man exclaimed, wounding his arms around his daughter's frame and hugging her tight.

"H-Hi Dad!" Charlie stuttered as she struggled for breath. Once she was finally let go, she took a deep breath in and showcased the somewhat okay-ish decor of the hotel and its residents.

You saw Lucifer bend down and give his attention to the little kit "Kee Kee" and then turn his attention to "Razzle" and "Dazzle". You chuckled at his behavior. No way was the original bad boy of hell this adorable.

After his unsavory introduction to Alastor, Charlie started introducing him to every one of you.

"Annnd, this is our resident baker! They make amazing treats for everyone from time to time!" Charlie said, introducing you to her dad.

"Greetings your majesty, it is a pleasure to meet you," you gave a little bow, "I made some cookies for you to try, if you like."

Lucifer picked one cookie from your tray and inspected it for a bit, before taking a bite. You did not know whether you held your breath because you were scared of his critique or because you did not realize how gorgeous he looked up close. He was an angel, alright.

His eyes lit up and he looked up at you, "This is excellent! You really have a talent in this."

Your face heated up at his compliment and you mumbled out a small thank you.

This was your very first interaction with the king of hell.

⊱ ──── 《∘◦♡◦∘》 ──── ⊰

After the fight against the angels and the rebuilding of the hotel, Lucifer started spending more time at the hotel to help out his daughter.

While searching for Charlie, he found you bustling around in the kitchen, preparing something.

"What are you doing?"

Your head hit the underside of the cabinet at the sudden interruption. You emerged out with a whisk in hand, nursing your wound.

"Y-your majesty, I was making a strawberry rhubarb pie...well, at least trying to," your eyes glanced over at the mess that was your creation. Instead of a flaky solid crust, you ended up with something that could only be described as "a lump" and your fillings decided to make themselves known outside the crust, spreading all over your pie- almost resembling a massacre.

You were usually good at stuff like this. You wondered what you got wrong with this particular recipe.

Lucifer hummed and asked for the recipe.

"I suppose it's only best to start over, shall we?" he said, as he started walking towards where the bag of flour was kept. You could only follow behind him, your face flabbergasted. You suddenly felt very nervous.

What you would come to find out, during this little interaction, was that Lucifer was really good at baking. Like, really really good. His hands were swift but precise when handling the dough and his instructions were clear and concise as the two of you worked through the steps to create the perfect rhubarb pie.

When you pulled out a successful pie from the oven, your eyes gleamed with excitement. You looked over at Lucifer, who was already getting ready to slice up the pie.

"Thank you for helping me out, Your Majesty, " you said, giddily, "Your baking skills are honestly out of this world!"

Lucifer laughed, his smirk widening, "Well of course! Just because I rule all of hell, doesn't mean I can't bake a mean pie!"

He looked at you and said, "And please, do call me Lucifer."

⊱ ──── 《∘◦♡◦∘》 ──── ⊰

Over time, the two of you bonded over your love for cooking. He would frequently join in on your cooking/baking escapades, sometimes acting as the taste tester for your new creations. You enjoyed his presence and grew comfortable with him as the days went on. Safe to say, he felt the same way.

One day, you decided to visit him in his workshop with a plate of freshly prepared caramel apples --something Lucifer himself taught you.

You knocked on the door, announcing your arrival, "Lucifer! It's me! May I come in?"

You heard a loud crash on the other side of the door and a very distinct "shit shit shit" coming from the king of hell himself. Your brows scrunched up in worry. What was that man up to?

You were about to barge into the room yourself but you were interrupted by the door opening to reveal a very disheveled Lucifer.

He called out your name, "Welcome to my workshop! What brings you here?"

As you entered the room, your eyes gazed upon the innumerable rubber ducks that spread across the area. You almost stepped over one as you made your way inside.

"Pray tell," you turned towards him, eyes narrowed in scrutiny, "What was that loud crash I heard?"

"What crash?" Lucifer chuckled uncomfortably, his eyes looking everywhere else but yours.

You sighed and placed the tray of caramel apples on his work desk.

"You do realize I've spent enough time with you to know when you're lying, yes?" you enquired.

He tsked, "Lying? pshhh, I don't lie!"

You have a half-hearted nod, clearly not believing his bullshit. He ignored your obvious sarcasm and moved closer to the delicious treats laid out on the desk.

"Oh my! You managed to make these all by yourself!" his hands reached out to one of them, taking a bite, "And they're delicious!"

You chuckled, "Well I did learn from the best, didn't I?"

His pale complexion reddened as he avoided your eyes once more, focusing more on the treat he was munching on.

You were about to ask him about the crash you heard again, but you were interrupted by a loud oink at the door.

"Fat Nuggets!" you cheered, as you got down on what little space was available to you at the mercy of the overbearing amount of ducks in the room.

You patted your knees which signaled to the little pig to come bounding towards you. You giggled as he jumped into your lap and snuggled into you.

You scratched his pinkish skin, "Who's a good boy?"

"Me."

Your hands paused, resting on the pig who let out a single oink. Your face started heating up as you looked up towards Lucifer, who was still focused on munching on the caramel apples, already having had two.

"I-I'm sorry...w-what?" you stuttered.

Lucifer turned around to look at you , mid bite. His face scrunched up in confusion, "What?"

Silence occupied the room for a few seconds, save for the pig oinking every now and then.

It was as if the light bulb popped up on top of Lucifer's big hat and his face started turning the same colour as the bright red caramel-dipped apples he was chewing on.

"I-..." Lucifer trailed off, suddenly finding it difficult to swallow his meal.

Picking up the pig into your arms, you got up. Unable to meet his eye, afraid that he would see your face flushed in embarrassment, you said, "Welp, I guess it's time for me to do..the thing I was...supposed to be doing!"

Before you could turn around on your heel, Lucifer reached out, "W-wait a minute-"

You gasped as he stepped on one of his rubber ducks and stumbled to the floor, his hat falling off his head.

"I'm okay!" he grumbled, as he got up, his hands dusting over his garments. He picked up his hat and brushed over it once, before putting it on his head. He looked towards you, confused to see your eyes trained on something lying on the ground.

His eyes followed yours and landed on a rubber duck. A rubber duck that bore a very similar resemblance to well...you.

Lucifer fumbled, picked up the duck, and hid it away from your sight,.

"Oooh boy, how did that get there, haha!" he laughed, awkwardly.

Your face might as well start boiling at this point.

"D-did you make that....for me?" you enquired, the pig already having jumped out of your hands and on his way back to his owner.

Lucifer's eyes widened as he sheepishly said, "Maybe?"

You walked closer to him.

"M-may I see it?" you asked.

Lucifer gulped once, before moving his hands from behind his back, to reveal the duck he had spent so much time working on.

You gently took his creation from his hands and held it in the palms of your own, your eyes lighting up as you looked at the mini-duck version of yourself.

"I-I promise, I wasn't being creepy," Lucifer started, "I was going to give this to you once I worked on it a little more. I know it looks a bit undone and-"

"It's lovely," your voice interrupted him.

His golden heart started beating impossibly louder at the sight of your widening smile. You were smiling...at something he made... for you. He worried if you could hear his heartbeat.

"I- I'm still not satisfied with the product, " he looked towards the floor, fixing his bowtie out of nervousness.

You let out a chuckle, "Is that what the loud crash was about? Did you fall out of your chair trying to hide this from me?"

He looked towards you, embarrassed that you'd guessed right. You laughed louder at his silent admission. Watching the king of hell squirm under your gaze as his face turned fully red, was indeed a sight to behold.

You tiptoed closer to him, took off his hat, and gently lifted his tomato-faced visage. His eyes widened as you cheekily smiled at him. Then you kissed his forehead, relishing in the way he stiffened. He was too adorable for your own good.

You stepped back, putting his hat back on his head, and placed the incomplete duck version of your likeness into his trembling hands.

"Do keep working on it till it is to your satisfaction, hm?" you said.

He nodded his head fervently. His face still held the same shade of red.

What came next was something he swore would be his undoing.

You leaned in closer and whispered in his ear, "Good boy."

It took him a while to recover from that assault.

[koolades-world]

Hi i don't know if anyone else gave this idea but i'm saying it anyway. I like Satan x MC stories and i was thinking about...what if MC has anger issues and because of that they recived horrible comments?.

I like to think that MC doesn't have many friends because of that and because people don't understand them, It makes MC even more upset with others and themselves but everything changes when they meet Satan and see that they are not alone.

MC would spend a lot of time with him so they can both help each other and grow together, of course at first the brothers didn't care because they didn't understand them very well either but over time they began to feel jealous.

I think this Is a great idea for an MC and Satan angst/fluff story but feel free to write It or not, Hope you like this ♥️

hi!

you're so right, this has great hurt/comfort potential! i love anything satan and i love the dynamic these two would have!! the day i stop loving satan is the day i die. i'll be in the nursing home and still talking about my little pookie LOL

enjoy <3

understanding

If you would've told your past self where you were now, you would have laughed. You would've never guessed that it would taking going to hell and back, literally, to find someone you could be yourself around.

The day you arrived in the Devildom, it had just been another day. You were getting ready to wind down for the evening when you were swept away and planted in front of who you later got to know as Diavolo. Since you were half asleep, you thought what you were experiencing was a dream, so you went along with everything with no questions. When you awoke the next morning, it was a different story. The only one who was able to get through to you was Satan, who you'd only met briefly the previous day. After that, it was all history.

Before you'd met Satan, forming relationships had been somewhat of an endeavor. You struggled to get close to those around you without scaring them away by accident. You wished they would just stick around to hear you out. Satan did just that because he understood where you were coming from. It was refreshing. The two of you became fast friends and helped each other grow. You exchanged tips and tricks, as well as always being there for the other. Your bond was only strengthened when the two of you formed a pact to the point where the two of you were essentially inseparable.

However, while you grew closer to Satan, you grew more distant from the other brothers. It wasn't unexpected since Satan was the only one who'd truly understood you, but that didn't mean it wasn't upsetting. Just because you knew the pain didn't mean that it didn't hurt. You weren't all that sure why though. You'd been getting much better with keeping yourself in check, and they were used to your tendencies since they'd know Satan since arriving in the Devildom. You thought things might have been different this time.

But, insanity was doing the same thing over and over again, expecting a different result.

After another long day at RAD, you arrived home and sat in the living room by the fire. You were doing the work you'd been assigned earlier that day. You heard someone enter the room, and take a seat on the sofa behind you. Paying them no mind, you kept working. The longer you sat there, the more you felt their eyes boring a hole in the back of your head. You tried your best to keep your focus on your work, since you lived there too and had just as much of a right as they did to sit in common space.

But, as things usually went, you struggled to ignore the eyes trained on you. So, the moment they dared to utter a word, you blew up. You hadn't had a fit of rage that intense since you came to the Devildom. Of course, it wasn't just the staring that got to you. It was all the pent up emotions you'd accrued over the course of months. At some point, you felt tears slip down your face as you shouted whoever happened to was sitting there. They decorated your face as a display of your unspoken feelings. To you, there was no point in wiping them away when more were just going to fall. Through the blur of tears, you couldn't tell and you didn't bother to try to figure out.

You threw down your work on the coffee table, and stormed out of the room. You let your feet take you to where ever they wanted to, which is how you found yourself outside of Satan's door. But, your arms wouldn't move, so you just let your head hit the door. You heard Satan within, moving to the door. He cracked it, and upon seeing the state you were in, ushered you in.

For a bit, the two of you just sat in silence. You sat side by side on his bed, his arm around your shoulders. He offered you a tissue, which you simply balled up in your hand.

"What's wrong?" He finally spoke.

"It's dumb." You responsded.

"Nothing is dumb. This is a safe space. You can tell me." He reassured you. You were quiet again for a little bit, trying to gather your thoughts and put them into words.

"I don't know why, but I hate your brothers. Not in a hatred way, but they infuriate me. I can't describe it." You spat out the words like they were bitter in your mouth. Satan pondered your words for a moment. You were a little afraid to look at him, but you were greeted with his beautiful green eyes searching you.

"You just want them to like you, don't you?" He said. You slowly nodded, thinking about his words. "I was in the same position once. I was afraid they were going to hate me for what I was, so I tried to change." He looked as if he wanted to say more, but stopped himself.

"What did you do?" You weren't sure why exactly you were asking. To get advice for your current situation or to hear the end of the story, you were unsure.

"I stopped pretending to be something I wasn't, and just became me. Yes, I did learn to control my wrath, but I was myself." Satan had a far off look in his eyes, likely reminicing.

"Is that why they hate me?" You gnawed at your lip at the prospect of them hating the mask you tried to present to the outside world.

"No. I don't think they actually dislike you. I know them. It may not be as well as they know each other, but it's enough to know they don't distain you." He refocused his gaze on you again.

"Then what is it?" You felt a slight rage simmering again. Just the thought of the brothers was sending you into a tizzy.

"I think they're jealous." He stated.

"Of what? My anger issues?" You scoffed at yourself.

"Of us." He presented this as if it was common knowledge, leaving you a little puzzled.

"What do you mean?" Time felt like it slowed down when you heard his words.

"I think they envy the bond that we have. They see the you that you are around me, and wish they could have the same. Since they were so cold to you at first, however, they're finding it hard to break the ice." Satan spoke slowly, each word deliberate. "No pun intended." You let out a little snort at that.

"Do you really think that?" You could feel the rage begin to dissipate as you let his words sink in.

"I do." The two of you sat without exchanging words again as you digested the information. A small grin formed on your face. "There's that smile." He beamed.

"Thank you. Sorry for not telling you sooner." You hung your head a little, almost ashamed of your actions.

"No need to apologize. But, next time, do come to me. Even if I don't have the answer, you shouldn't keep it all in like that." Satan lightly ruffled your hair affectionately.

"I'm glad to have met you."

"Me too."

[slaymbo]

yandere class 1a hcs because im a degenerate (seperate and togetherish)

okay, for a bit of context, the reader has an earthbending quirk where they can bend anything that comes from the earth (obvs) and theyre very talented at it! theyre so good that if theres even a speck of dirt in a glass of water they could bend it (which is why they get mistaken for having a quirk that controls all the elements instead of just earth)

however, a really big drawback is the fact that they have to be barefoot/wear thin shoes to bend properly so they feel more in-tune with the earth and whatnot

another drawback is that they can feel and "hear" a lot of things with their quirk as long as their wearing thin/no shoes, so hearing other people talk while they can feel the earth rumble beneath them is a bit overwhelming, which is why i feel that the reader wouldnt talk as to not overwhelm themselves too much

however, that doesnt stop the chaotic class 1a, because of course it doesnt

when y/n transfers to ua, the class immediately falls in love with them!

their bubbly personality, their kindness, their smile

if the class could make a list about all the things they love about y/n, it would be at least a lightyear long

i feel like tokoyami, darkshadow and the bakusquad would be the most adamant on trying to get them to speak to them

because even though they like it when they pay attention and sign to them, they need to hear their darling speak!!!

it'd be pretty funny if dark shadow scared them to try and get them to make even the tiiiiiniest noise and y/n turns around slowly and stares until he retreats back to tokoyami (he was a bit jealous that he wasnt looked at like that by them, but whatever)

one day, denki walks by y/n's dorm and hears a voice--their voice

his heart starts beating fast bc omg!!!! he finally heard their beautiful voice!!!

y/n, who can literally feel heartbeats thru their feet, opens the door and is in shock (the pun was intended) that denki is just standing there like the lovesick buffoon he is he totally got their voice recorded too

y/n asks if they can see his phone so they can "record" their singing voice

they then proceed to delete the recording

denki is FLOORED, his flabbers are ghasted!!!

uhhh i dont feel like writing more of the story so heres a rapid fire of random ideas

the whole class has definitely pretended to be sick/hurt multiple times so that their sweet darling would "nurse" them back to "health"

one time shoto used his quirk to make his body hot so it would seem like a fever and y/n touched his forehead and said "omg sho, ur so hot!!! :((("

he fainted from that and had to be taken to the nurse for realsies

izuku has broken his bones just so y/n would give him attention

which is, i kid you not, what made them realize they could bend bone

they taught themselves how to mend, break, and move bone to their will and izuku was so proud!!! (btw he totally has multiple notebooks abt them and their quirk)

iida and todoroki have tried multiple times to pay the reader to talk

mina got them to speak by giving them kool-aid jammers and white peaches

there have been so many times y/n has made ochako so happy that she floats

they have to use their quirk to get her downnnn

there was one time the class went to a pool and tsuyu said it was cold :( so y/n literally bent lava ever-so-slightly closer to the surface of the earth to make sure she wasnt as cold

bakugo has yelled at y/n to talk and they've signed "shh, im mewing" so many times

speaking of them signing, during the sports festival i feeel liek they could body shinso so easily

they learned that they could bend bone AND they never talk, so they just bend his ass out of the ring

[queenshelby]

Yes! Mr Murphy (Rewritten)

PART 24: THE LOSS

Pairing: Cillian Murphy x Reader

Warning: Lots of Angst, Age Gap, Teacher x Student, Pregnancy Loss, Infertility

Your PoV (starting with a little flashback)

It was Saturday, at around 5 o’clock, when everything changed and you struggled to stand up straight, experiencing more pain in your abdomen than you had ever experienced before, all whilst watching Nina perform the chorography for her solo.

It felt like someone took a knife, stabbed you and then twisted it around, making you drop to the ground rather suddenly.

Nina, however, did not notice right away as she was focused on the music and her performance, thereby following your instructions to forget the world around her when being on stage and, unfortunately for you, she did not react when you tried to call out for her.

The pain was so intense that you could barely speak and the level of pain made it clear to you that you absolutely needed to see a medical professional right away.

“Nina!” you thus called out again, unable to move and, just as she noticed you having collapsed, you saw big red puddle of blood on the floor.

The bleeding was heavier than anything you had ever experienced and the cramping was torture, causing you to tare your nails through the ground as Nina jumped off stage.

“Oh shit” she cursed, unsure what to do.

“I need you to call an ambulance” you barely managed to say as you got even more intense pains around your shoulders and clavicle now, making your breathing rather difficult.

“Okay. I am getting my phone. Don’t move” Nina told you before racing to her locker while you tried very hard not to pass out.

It took literally everything in you to keep breathing and push through a moment that had you believing that you were living your last minutes of life while Nina called triple nine and it was just before the ambulance arrived that the pain went to a whole new level, causing you to finally pass out.

***

Waking up in the hospital, you had Emma by your side. She was your next of kin and held your hand when the doctors gave you the news which more than stunned you.

“We stopped the bleeding for now, but we must operate immediately” was what a man dressed in blue had told you and you still were not sure what was going on.

“Why?” you barely managed to say in your dazed state, causing Emma to hold on to your hand more firmly now.

“You are experiencing pregnancy complications, resulting in the rupture of one of your fallopian tubes” he explained, causing you to shake your head while the nurses rushed around to get you ready for surgery.

“I am not pregnant” you told him, still confused and somewhat besides yourself.

“You are. You have, what we call, an ectopic pregnancy and we put you on a blood transfusion in order to stabilise you for surgery. We will need operate now, remove the pregnancy, and see whether we can repair the rupture as you are still bleeding in to your abdomen. We need to act now as this condition is life threatening but we may need to remove your tube if we cannot repair it” the doctor explained to you and, all you could do by this point, was to nod.

“Okay, just do what you have to do” you then said while unable to grasp the fact that you were pregnant and, of course, since you had the implant put in at nineteen, you did not even consider the idea of pregnancy or miscarriage.

“The theatre is ready, doctor” you then heard one of the nurses say and, after that, everything happened so fast that there was not even time to think.

You were shocked and scared and completely heartbroken. You never wanted to have children but this came as a surprise and you did not know how to handle it. It was not fair, and you were not ready for it.

You just wanted to break into tears and sob in protest. The tears began to well, but as they began to fill your eyes, you turned within to impart a little wisdom upon yourself.

“You can do anything” you said to yourself which was exactly what your mother told you the last time you saw her. It was when you were taken away by the Department of Immigration and placed into the Forster care system, following which you had never seen her again. But, with this wisdom in mind, you turned to joking with your medical staff as you were poked, questioned, and drugged.

As you were wheeled away and the weight of anaesthesia began to bear down on you, you had complete acceptance of what was happening and trusted that everything was as it should be. Then there was nothing…

***

Awakening from surgery was like coming back to life. The drugs had your brain filled with a thick mental fog that had you feeling as though you were waking from a ten-year coma. You were in and out and barely capable of a clear and coherent thoughts, but it only took a second for you to realise that you were experiencing the worst nausea of your life. You made this clear to the nurse standing over you and as you again fell back out of consciousness, she injected something into your IV.

You came to it again moments or minutes later without any nausea and managed to ask where Emma was before you drifted off again and then, the next time you opened your eyes, you saw the nurse walking in with her and Connie who wanted to check on you after what Nina had told her.

“Is Nina okay?” was the first thing you managed to say, seeing that the last you remembered of her was her calling an ambulance which, at thirteen years of age, must have been a pretty big deal.  

“She is fine. But, how about you?” Connie asked, not knowing what had happened to you.

“I am okay, I think” you told her while Emma advised her that you probably needed some rest now and, without informing her of the procedure performed, Connie chose to give you some privacy.

“Thanks for checking in on me. I appreciate it” you said nonetheless and she nodded.

“Any time! Please me know if you need anything, alright?” she then said before Emma took the seat next to your bed for the rest of the night until, the next morning, you were woken by the nurses again, performing some tests.

While the nurses took your vitals, the head surgeon came in and gave you an update which was something that did not happen the night before due to an influx of emergency patients.

He informed you that, despite their best efforts, your left fallopian tube had to be removed. In addition to that, your uterus had been perforated as the pregnancy was attached to the left-hand side of it and you were informed that you would need some bed rest for about two weeks which included a five-day hospital stay.

The surgery itself was not easy and a large incision had to be made on your abdomen due to the severe bleeding you were experiencing, now leaving you permanently scarred.

“Okay” was all you told him in response to what he had to say and he was rather surprised by how well you took it, knowing that most women in your position would have been frantic.

“You may not be able to have children without further medical intervention” you were then told by the doctor and, again, you nodded and replied with a simple “okay” as, the truth was, that the relief of surviving something that had you so close to death had you more than happy to face whatever awaited you after surgery and that even included the prospects of infertility.

“A counsellor will be available for you when you leave hospital” he then went on to say and you to chuckle.

“Honestly, I have been through counselling so many times in my life, I can assure you that I won’t need it” you said and it was at this point that the doctor decided to give you some more space as well, allowing you to come to terms with what happened to you at your very own pace.

***

Several minutes later, you were finally served your first meal since your surgery and you could not recall the last time porridge tasted so good. You were starving and, just as you ate your mushy oats, Emma read through a magazine that had just been delivered to the hospital that morning.

“Anything interesting?” you asked as Emma zipped through it, page after page, until she gasped heavily, causing your eyebrows to furrow.

“What is it?” you wanted to know but Emma knew that now was not the time to tell you as she read through the short article quickly.

“Nothing, just some gossip about…no one really…” she said while closing the paper and dropping it to the floor, not wanting you to see its content…

[captain-mj]

Angst idea: Horangi has gambles with his life constantly, Konig is worried, it all ends in Horangi betting wrong, and loosing something (his life, getting another scar, smth else). And then Horangi sees Konig's worry and *guilt* happens.

Fluff Idea: Mornin cuddles w korangi

Angst Idea

König had his radio on, listening to Horangi and Stiletto talking. They were trying to get to the evac. The three of them had separated on the mission, divide and conquer strategy, but they hadn't been quite as lucky as König.

Stilleto's progress was painfully slow, the area crawling with people. They didn't have all of the documents but backup had come and despite their training, they were far too outnumbered.

König tried not to rush them. "Horangi, how far?"

"Not too far. I can't see you just yet."

"Stilleto?"

"Been stuck in one place. Couple of men a little out. Don't think I can take them. Out of ammo."

König made sure they couldn't hear him before groaning. This mission had been disastrous. His gun wouldn't work very well to snipe to provide cover. He was fucking useless here.

König shoved his fingers under his mask to chew his nails, but his gloves stopped him.

Horangi came on. "I see an office. I'm going to go check it."

"What?" König shouted into the radio. "No. Come to evac."

Stiletto immediately started on him. "Absolutely not. This mission went sideways. Let's go."

"Doesn't have to be a complete bust."

"Horangi." König growled. "No."

There was a moment of silence, both of them surprised König of all people could sound so commanding.

"König, I can get them."

"It's not a gamble worth taking."

"I disagree." Horangi answered before they both heard the click of the comms.

König started to curse and spit in German, trying to desperately to get an answer he knew wasn't coming.

Stiletto eventually arrived and she looked just as concerned as he did.

Evac came and there was still nothing.

Then he heard the gunshots. Several and leading right towards them. König got his gun ready and went forward, planning to help.

Horangi appeared right in front of them. He was right there.

Horangi smiled at him. His eyes crinkling around the edges because of it.

The bullet went straight through his ribs. They all heard it. Breaking the calm air was the sound of it smashing through his bones.

Horangi fell like a cut puppet.

König stared at him. He grabbed someone. Their body snapped over his knee like a toy. He started to tear someone's head off. Maybe literally. He didn't know.

Then he was on base. The time in between was lost to him, but König didn't care to find it.

Horangi was there. That was what was important.

HIs body looked so tiny. They had taken off his mask.

König had dripped blood on the floor. He hadn't noticed. All the nurses stayed on the opposite side from him, eyeing him like he was a street dog.

Maybe he was. A feral thing who's master had been hurt.

König laid his head on his arms, shaking.

"He's in critical condition."

"The wounds will slowly heal."

"He'll be scarred."

König closed his eyes tight, hearing the nurses still. He didn't want to think about that. He still wasn't sure how much time had passed. Had it been a few hours? Weeks? He couldn't remember. It felt like he had been dropped back into his body. Suddenly waking after a very long dream.

-

Horangi felt the pain in his body almost immediately. His entire being made of nothing but pain. A sharp line went through his body like he was being staked. Dull throbs ran along his legs.

Bad gamble.

He chuckled at himself. Of course he lost. Dogshit gambler.

Hands were on him and his first thought was, like always, his debters. They must've found him. Must've...

He opened his eyes and stared up into König's. His hood had been discarded, letting Horangi get the full effect of his face. His sad, pained, grief-stricken face.

König's lip wobbled. "You scared me."

"I..." Horangi frowned and stared up at him. Why? He was expecting König to be angry at him for disobeying his orders or irritated at him for getting hurt.

"I thought I was going to lose you." König grabbed Horangi's hands gently and kissed them softly.

"I'm sorry." Horangi stared at him longer and guilt started to fill his chest. "I didn't;..."

"You were hurt." König said miserably, leaning closer. "You're still very hurt. I'm so sorry. I should've came for you."

Horangi kissed him gently. "I didn't mean to scare you, gongjunim. I should've lsitened."

König pulled back. "Why?"

"I thought..." He stared into the giant soft blue eyes and he just sighed. "I gambled."

König stared at him before just nodding. "They weren't sure you'd wake back up." He wouldn't look at him. Horangi really wished he'd look at him.

"I won't ever worry you like that again."

König kissed his cheek. "Good. Please don't..."

[androgynousblackbox]

The Horror of Our Love. 2 [Appleradio, Radioapple]

The Journal

I didn't grow up in the most ideal conditions. It got a lot better when my father died of a mysterious and very sudden heart failure that literally no one could predict. He was such an angry man. Maybe all that stress just got to him finally! I still remember the way his eyes opened up so wide while he was grabbing at his chest. He wasn't looking at me because I was behind the couch, but I could see him. I could hear him too. Hear the quick pacing of his heart as it became slower, slower and slower, until there was no beating anymore. It got so quiet all over the house for a second before he hit the floor.

That is how I found out I had magic. Unfortunately for me, my mother was a muggle and had no idea of what to do with a magical child who told her, at the tender age of 4, that he was responsible for stopping him, hoping to get praise out of it. I want to make it clear right now that it wasn't my intention to kill him. A kid that young can't understand things like life or death. They can't understand that when the heart fails and someone drops to the floor, they are never getting back up again. I just wanted him to stop. Right at the moment. In whatever way it was possible. 

It just turned out that the way to stop him resulted in his death. When mother explained it to me, that father was gone, I remember staring at her and wondering why she was so sad about it. I wasn't sad. I wasn't happy either. It just was.

It wouldn't be until much later that I find out that the magic had skipped the generation of my father and he had abandoned the entire wizard world out of pure resentment. He never even tried to tell my mom about it and instead treated her as if that was somehow her fault. Neither of us had the language for what was going on with me, but I didn't really need it that much.

A kid doesn't really need to know the name for every part of their body before they already know how to move on it. My magic was as real for me as my own fingers or my own feet, even if I couldn't see it. Even at that age I knew, it was only a matter of time and practice for me to learn to handle it just as well. Just another muscle at my disposal. 

But after it was only my mother and I didn't have much of a reason to train that muscle. Moving things around me without actually touching them was entertainment enough. We had a few good five years before a disease took her. I tried to help, but I didn't know how and doctors were constantly taking me away from her side to perform whatever is that they felt they had to do. The neighbor that was taking care of me during those weeks said that it was the lungs. Hers were not working properly anymore so it was harder to breathe. It was a lot more advanced than they thought initially. There was not a lot of hope for a recovery. I thought about the heartbeat of my father as it was slowly fading away and the idea that the heartbeat of my mother could go through the same thing was so horrific I accidentally made all the lights on the building explode. 

When they finally let me hold her hand, I concentrated so hard on trying to make her all better, all the while happily telling her about what I learned at school that day. I tried to get her breathing to become normal again. I tried to ignore my own heart beating in my ears, while I somehow kept talking. As I was doing that, a machine beeped close to her. Once again they pulled me out, but I saw her eyes closed and I panicked.

No magic that time. Just a kid scared out of his mind whose only thought was he didn't want his mother to die. I think I bit at least two nurses and kept yelling they had to let me see her, they had to, I could help, they just had to let me see her. 

The next time I saw her face, it was at the funeral her friends organized for her. No siblings, no grandfathers that could look after me. The family on the side of my father didn't even know I existed at that time. 

Of course I ended up in an orphanage, where I thought I would stay until I was old enough they would have to kick me out. I didn't want a new family. Quite frankly that wasn't ever an idea that crossed my mind. I already had the best mom this world could offer me, and I couldn't do anything to save her. Why would I want to repeat any of that ever again? It just made a lot more sense to stay where I was until something more interesting happened. 

That something came just a couple of years later in the form of a beautiful woman who came to see in my room. She wasn't one of our teachers or part of the staff. I would remember someone like her. There was no husband that I could see, so that already was new. Couples came to visit us, to try to pick us out like puppies at the pet shop, not single people.

She made a little bit of conversation first. Asking my name, what I liked to do, if I liked to be here, if I had lots of friends, before reaching to the actual important issue. I was just a few weeks away from being 11. Sera was the teacher of transformation back then. She gave my letter herself and let me read it and sat down on my bed, patiently waiting for me to start asking her questions. 

The first one I made was, naturally, when we can go. I thought it was hilarious. I didn't believe her at all at first, so I wanted to see how far she was willing to take this prank. 

When she started to make some of my belongings float around the room, I was convinced that it was strings and trickery somehow. It didn't make any sense to me that other people had the same muscle I did, that they were older, more powerful than me, and they had nothing to show for the rest of the world. That I never heard of them before, that nobody knew. The existence of the secret, that barrier between the muggle world and the wizard one, was to me a testament of how utterly useless the entire rest of the wizard world had to be. It was easier to believe I was the only one with real magic than to think that an entire civilization could be based around hiding theirs. 

She could see I wasn't taking her seriously. She pulled an apple from somewhere on her business suit and told me to eat it while thinking about my favorite food. I thought about the pasta that mom used to prepare and suddenly I had a mouthful of it when I bit into the apple. That was the thing that finally did it for me. That flavor sealed my fate. 

As she helped me out to buy all my essentials for my first year, she mentioned offhandedly that my last name was known. We were in one of the book stores and she poked with a finger a book whose author had my same last name. They had copies of that same one back at the school I was going to, if I ever was curious about it. For now, the book itself was far too advanced for my current level, and the money the school could supply for me was pretty limited, so it wasn't convenient to buy it then.

On my first night there all I could think about was that book. The topic itself could be anything, but the fact that a member of my family wrote it made all the difference in the world. I took it out of the library as soon as I knew how and read it entirely in one week, all 923 pages. I didn't understood not even a fifth of it and yet, I needed more. I started researching the author on the side, all the while learning more about how wizards worked. It wasn't until a few days later of my arrival that I found out that I was an anomaly inside of the house I landed in.

A kid raised outside of any magic or wizard culture in Slytherin? It was a struggle, I won't lie about it. So many references, jokes and little details that so many others grow up with, things I had to pretend not to care about until I could find out more about it on my own. Likewise, the things I knew were completely alien for them or made no sense. There were slip ups and mistakes, miscommunication along the way. We were from two different worlds after all, and I just find out theirs existed not that long ago. I had a lot to catch up on if I wanted to have free movement to do as I pleased.

Something all the more necessary the more research I did on this one wizard. His name carried a long history that just kept unraveling the more I pulled. Notorious wizards, but also nobodies that disappeared without a trace. Those were the ones who ended up giving more information, ironically enough. Those were the ones who thought their names alone made them somebody that the rest of the world should know. 

I don't think I exaggerate when I say that I spent the entirety of my first year, and a considerable portion of the second one, just looking further and further back in my family's history. It's funny to think about it now. If professor Sera hadn't mentioned that name to me, so many things could have been avoided entirely. I am thankful to her for doing that. She is never going to know how much.

If it wasn't for her, I would have never gone to the girl's bathroom on the top floors. I would have never looked at the serpents at the sink in the eye and ordered them to wake up. I would have never gone down that hole that opened up for me or continue down the dark corridor to that chamber. I would have never come inside, ignoring every sign of alarm that told me I should be running away from there, to find the monster that slept under the giant statue. I would have never seen those yellow eyes opened up at my intrusion and that pure white body slithering its way towards me. Only stopping from devouring me whole when I said, on his own tongue, that he was beautiful. His mouth opened wide so I could see his fangs dripping with venom. 

He immediately retracted them and looked at me, slowly lowering to see me at eye level. Completely flat on the floor as he was, I still had to raise my head to meet him. The shock was to be expected. It had been decades since the last time anyone with my former last name had come to visit him. None of them have been as young as I was.

He told me that as I came closer to inspect him, seemingly expecting something from me, but I couldn't figure out what nor I cared. There was no plan when I came to visit him. I did it anyway because I knew I could and I wanted to see him myself. It was my birthright, after all. Nobody else in that entire school could have done what I did. Nobody else deserved to look upon him like I could. Only me.

Now that I was in front of him, I barely dared to move. I patted his nuzzle, clumsily, fascinated by the sensation of his scales, and I blurted out my name. He repeated it for himself and the sound of it sent a shiver down my spine. His voice was not the voice anyone could expect coming from a monster. It was light and melodic, one made for singing and telling stories until dawn. It sounded exhausted now that he wasn't going to eat me, not even mustering the enough interest to be legitimately disappointed. I thought it was a pity that such a voice had to be concealed like this.

He finally asked what I wanted.

I looked around at his chamber, bigger than any church I went with my mom with, bigger than any other close space I had seen in my life. It was appropriate for the size this monster had. Seeing as he wasn't going to impede me, I kept exploring around. There were statues of my ancestors at the sides. Some were broken up in some parts because of the years passed, while others were just destroyed to leave behind feet on a base.

The massive head of the monster followed me. His whole body moved easily for the size it was, but there was a heaviness there that couldn't be ignored. He could crush me with his tail alone if he wanted to. Standing right at his side my head would not reach above his back. I could be just a stain under him and nobody would even know it. I made sure to close the entrance before I advanced any further. It would be so easy for him. 

"Is this where you sleep?" I asked.

"No, I was just napping" he said and I could hear his patience growing thin. 

Completely understandable, of course. There he was, a legendary beast, just lounging in his chamber when a little kid comes around and starts asking questions while not answering him. In my defense, I can at least say that I wasn't doing it out of some power play. I honestly had no answer to give except that I wanted to stay there, with him, but that didn't sound like the kind of answer that he expected to hear and I had no desire to justify myself.

"Where do you actually sleep? Can you show me?"

If a snake could only frown, I know he would have. As it was, only his voice and eyes could tell me how thoroughly confused he was at the request.

"Why?"

"I want to see."

It was a nest that was set up for him under the statue. The stairs leading up to there seemed so long back then, but it took him a second to descend there. I saw old pillows, blankets and even some pieces of clothing of past students he must have grabbed to form this. There the ceiling was oblong, making it like a curve cave where only a small portion of light came in. Even in the darkness I could see his eyes and the pearly shine of his scales, waiting for my next reaction. I had to disappoint him again by keeping asking him questions, way too many in fact for him to actually respond before I had jumped to the next. From my ancestors to how this place came to be, what did he eat, how did he move around the school, why nobody had found him yet, could he leave, what other magic he could do.

Most of it I came to find out in my next visits. I tried to come for at least a few hours everyday and every time I did he was always lifting his head, as if ready to act on a command I just never gave him. Instead I brought my books to study there and read when I finished my homework and played chess when I was bored. I didn't have to explain the rules to him. He just told me that he learned a long time ago, even before landing on this chamber, but it had been ages since he played so he was pretty rusty. That was the excuse at least. I still beat him the majority of times. It was a special kind of joy to see this huge best pout and make excuses the more I grew up, until his I am just letting you win because you are young made less and less sense.

He told me I was a weird kid. Shouldn't you be socializing with other kids your age? Here it is cold, damp and there is not a lot to do. Surely I could have better options for activities that didn't include this place. He was just a big boring monster that left to their own devices and was just going to sleep, eat and sleep again. If I wasn't going to have him attack anyone, dispose of any body or some other task, he couldn't understand why I would want to spend my time there.

His words, not mine. To me it was pretty obvious, although I still had a few years left before fully understanding it myself. As one of the easiest reasons to grab, he was a vast source of knowledge. Making homework around him was just easier when I could ask him a question about something and more often than not he was going to have an answer. Potions were the subject where I could hear his voice perking up the most. What could have taken me maybe one hour on my own was cut in half when I could simply count with his help. 

Other reasons were less simple to explain and therefore I wouldn't even try. The way it made me feel when he let me rest my back against any part of his body as he laid comfortably, either eating some prey he had captured or doing nothing. Seeing his face covered in blood for the first time raised my heart and I had the image stuck in front of my eyes for a long time. How the first time that he laughed at one of my jokes felt like an accomplishment to be proud of and then I had to wonder when was even the last time anyone had told him any joke, good or bad. How the sound of his breathing was more comforting than the fire of a chimney in winter. How when he started calling me Al instead of Alastor or kid felt good. How his eyes started to light up and relax when he saw he was me at the door. 

I just wanted to come see him. Shouldn't that be enough?

Eventually his questioning became annoying. So of course, I took it as an open invitation for me to bring a friend over so he would shut up for once about socializing with kids my age. She had been one of my friends since the first year, but I didn't think to trust her until we were in our fourth year. She always knew I was up to something, but since I let her copy all my homework and helped her out with the subjects she had trouble with, I never felt the need to question too much about it. 

While everyone else in our class was in the nearby town, we were going down the tunnel in the bathroom. 

I could see his eyes growing hungry as he came close and I immediately had to tell him that she was a dear friend that I wanted him to see. Until then, she didn't fully believe me when I told her I knew the monster that lived under the school. For some reason she thought that was a way for me to hide the fact I was meeting with some boyfriend I was hiding from her. More reason as to why she didn't want to pressure me about it in the first place. She never told me why that was ever an option in her mind, though.

In any case, once he understood that she wasn't food or an enemy, he was just stunted as to what to do now. At least with me there was an expectation, but she was just a stranger. Not that she let him dwell too much on it before she was admiring him all over, praising him for being a worthy predator that surely inspired fear in all of his victims. Could he give her some sample of his venom just in case? Maybe a portion of his skin? Anything that he could be would be amazing.

He looked at me so confused, so lost in front of her open enthusiasm, that I had to laugh. She just likes magical creatures, especially the carnivorous ones. Her own mother raised dragons so she knew all there was to know about them, how to understand them and tame them. Even how their meat tasted, because when one dragon died it would be rude to just let it go to waste when it came to such majestic beasts. In hindsight, I should have known that she was going to be delighted to meet him from the start, but didn't feel inclined to bring her over until she presented me with her own girlfriend. I guess it was just time to do it then.

As a show of good will, she had brought dead rats in her bag for him. In the case that I was lying or embellishing things for her, she was planning to give them to her cat anyway. For a snake as big as him, rats were merely snacks, like peanuts were for us, but I think he did appreciate them all the same and relaxed after that. Of course she wanted to know everything about him, just like I did when I first met him, although she was a lot more polite and graceful about it. Beast or no beast, she was being her usual charming self all the same and wasn't about to be squeamish or scandalized for anything she happened to find out about his natural instincts. 

It took her another couple of visits, but she finally convinced him to fill up a jar she was carrying with his venom. He still insisted on being extremely careful when handling it. Inside the body it was definitely lethal for humans, there was no escaping that, but the mere contact with the skin was permanently paralyzing. There was a cure that had to be applied immediately. His sincere concern moved her to promise she was going to be as careful as one could be. When he wanted to know what she wanted in the first place, my friend just smiled and assured me a girl could always need something like that.

Of course she saved the secret. I never doubted her for a second. I just knew that she was going to understand the kind of marvel that he was, how truly amazing it was that he existed at all. Now I could finally have someone else to talk about him without pretending it was something else entirely. I could use his name as much as I wanted, as long as it was the two of us, and she would give me a knowing smile as she listened to me. She even helped me out to create alibis for being at the chamber late into the night. Was I not in the communal area right after dinner? Oh, I just had to study something in the library, don't worry about it. 

When I spent my first night down there, nobody asked me anything when I came back thanks to her. To be honest, I wasn't meaning to do it. It was a cold night, but inside of his nest it was warm and he was wrapped around me in a circle. I was reading a book at the light of a lintern and he was asleep already anyway, so how could I resist such a soft reset. I woke up covered in blankets and he was nowhere to be seen, but I didn't mind. Probably hunting his own breakfast somewhere in the castle. If I had food of my own, I wouldn't have minded waiting on him. Instead, I made my way back to the surface, towards the dungeon for my house. 

My dear friend found me on the way to go out with a group of friends and excused herself to come find me, grabbing my arms as she demanded to know what happened. The urgency of her tone sounded weird to me. I had literally just fallen asleep and he didn't want to wake me up or realized it was too late to send me away so he just let me rest there. What else could have happened? 

Of course I wouldn't mind spending another night there. All the nights in that castle. But I wasn't so naive to not understand that would only give me trouble in the long run. Just a few nights, though, and as long as I was careful to not concern the classmates I shared a room with, then why not? On my next visit, I commented that to him and he stared at me like I was insane.

"Why?" was all he could say.

"Because it is warmer here than in the dungeons and I don't have to hear snoring," I replied, which wasn't a lie and wasn't the whole truth either. But he wasn't going to hear me and take that either as a good enough answer. "Is that okay?"

He tilted his head to the side and finally shook it, as if he had given up understanding what was wrong with me. Probably for the best. Apparently two rats had walked all over me while I was sleeping, but he could eat them anyway without waking me up so I don't know how that was going to make me change my mind.

"Just make sure that you don't get into trouble" was the last recommendation before he officially threw the towel. 

I knew that already and I wasn't planning to risk it either. No because I was particularly fond of the rules, but if they ended up punishing me or expelling me then that meant little to no time to do the things that I actually wanted to do.  

In my fifth year at Hogwarts, there was a ballroom organized to celebrate the thousand year anniversary since the school's foundation. I hope I didn't give you the impression that I was antisocial, dear reader, far from it. I am just selective when it comes to the amount of people I decide to spend my time with and the amount of information I give them. I still enjoy the occasional outing just like any other kid of my age.

It wasn't enough for him, though. When I told him about the whole ballroom and how I was planning to just spend the night there, since everyone would be busy with their own celebration, he was indignant. I already made little sense for him, but for some reason this choice he found utterly worth arguing about. A kid like you, come on, surely you have more than plenty of admirers or someone that catches your eye. Are you actually telling me that all this time you were never interested in anyone? Not even once? There was no one that occupied your thoughts, you doodle their name along with you, imagine the two of you together, just enjoying each other's company? You are so young. You have no idea that you are never getting these years back so you should take advantage of them. Even if it's just fun. Make mistakes if you want to make them. This place was not made for a kid like you to have a normal joyful life. 

You should want to be away from here as much as possible. And yet you aren't. That was basically the gist of all of his protests. I cared very little for them, of course, but the nagging idea that he was the one who didn't want me there kept pestering me. In the end it made sense. Whereas my dear friend had brought snacks and sometimes I brought whatever dead animals I could catch to him, as said before, those were still merely snacks, small bites for him. They were ever going to fulfill him or give him more of a solid reason to at least stop trying to kick me out.

So I gave him to eat the janitor. That man made it so easy too.

The night of the ballroom, the date I had chosen to go with me unfortunately had a little stomach ache that terminated our night earlier than everyone else. It was almost like someone had slipped a little bit of something on their drink when they weren't looking. But not to worry too much, the effect only lasted until the next morning when the body would naturally take care of it. Nothing too serious either, just enough of an inconvenience to rather go to bed to rest than to keep dancing. They have never done me any wrong, after all.

As I made my way to the bathroom and pretended I was just walking around until it was empty, I didn't bother to be as discreet as usual. I could hear his steps down the hallways, waiting to see what I was doing. He already had his sights on me for some time because of all my sneaking around. He could never catch me in the act of doing anything wrong, but tonight he was finally going to have something. I like to think that he died at least with that satisfaction to console him.

I barely had to do anything for him to follow behind. When the bathroom was empty, when I started descending the tunnel, I was concerned about him going directly to any of the professors or the headmaster herself to inform them of what happened. Luckily for me, acting as if I had something in my pockets must have made him think that time was of the essence, so he didn't waste any on trying to find out what I was up to. 

Before I opened up the chamber, I paralyzed him. Then it was only a matter of bringing him floating inside. The giant snake came out slithering from the space under the big statue, directly from his nest, towards myself. I could tell that he was first confused, about to question why I wasn't at the party, until he noticed the present I had.

"What is that?"

"Your dinner. Unless you already had something."

"That is not funny, Alastor."

"Who is joking?" I dropped the janitor, still stiff as a wooden plank, down on the floor. My friend kept staring as if he didn't understand what I was doing. "He steals from the students, did you know? Goes through their mail, eats whatever concerned parents send to their kids. If he could get away with it, he would love to lash out with a whip, isn't that right?" I asked the man that couldn't respond to me or anyone for that matter. "He tells that all the time at least. About how that is supposed to build some discipline. There is always a first year that cries because of him. He won't be missed."

"Is that what you want?" he asked me.

I had again the sensation he was waiting for something of me. At the same time his tone of voice was just as confusing as it was filled with uncertainty. Why was he hesitating? Shouldn't he be glad I brought him food at last? He had been ready to devour my friend, how was this that different?

"He saw me come in" I said as my response. "He saw you already. He is listening right now, even if he can't understand a word, and I can't do obliviate spells yet. What do you think he is going to do if I just let him come back now?"

He still looked at me a while longer as he slithered across the floor until he was on top of the janitor. His yellow eyes stared at the man with an expression I couldn't read. Then he opened up his mouth. I barely managed to see a glimpse of his fangs before he had buried them in the middle of the janitor. It all happened so fast that I almost dropped my wand. 

He didn't lie about the effect of his venom. There was no reason for him to do it anyway, but I guess it takes an actual demonstration to really believe something that effective, that quick, can actually exist. I could see very clearly the moment in which the eyes of the man lost all focus, when the lights turned off, before I read a squishing ripping sound as he closed his jaw, taking with him the stomach and probably a good portion of his intestines with him. Even after death, the blood was pouring out everywhere. The smell was almost as overwhelming as the vision when he started to devour the rest, taking chunks and bites, swallowing limbs full. On more than one occasion I could feel his gaze over me, but I was too fascinated to move, to even speak.

By the time there was only a few stains of red in the stone floor, my legs were trembling and had to hold on to a nearby pillar. Slowly, he made his way towards me. I don't know what kind of reaction he was looking, maybe disgust or regret or maybe just laughter, but when instead I reached out arms open to hug my muzzle and lick the blood off his face I could feel his massive body flinching at once as if my tongue was an ax going for his throat. I didn't care that I was ruining the suit I had managed to rent for the party. 

I just knew I needed to be close, closer than I was before. It was a compulsion without any other thought behind, no reason that I could use to justify it not even to myself. When my tongue reached for the corners of his mouth, he suddenly reacted pulling back and I stumbled without my support, leaving me cold and dumbfounded. He was staring at me carefully for what seemed like a long moment until he spoke again.

"Go clean yourself" was all he said before he disappeared in one of the many tunnels around the chamber, all connected to the different pipes around the school that allowed him to move freely and undetected.

I licked my own lips, but it didn't taste the same as it did before, when it was on top of his skin. From that day on, he spoke to me more about his past. He had dropped some comments here and there throughout the years, but now it was finally painting a complete image of who he was. He didn't tell me all in one setting, there was usually some point in which he just couldn't continue anymore before he had to change the topic, but eventually I got it all.

He was not always a beast. Many, many, many years ago, when this school was still new, his father saw him communing with muggles in the nearby town to spread magical solutions to their problem. Diseases that otherwise would have killed them were eradicated, injuries that should have been fatal were cured in the blink of an eye, missing children were found, the harvest were a success and food was plentiful. Muggles first took him as a miracle worker, an angel sent by god from Heaven, and one day the narrative changed into that of a devil using temptation to take them to the wrong path. 

They followed him back home and retaliated against the smaller wizard population that they found. The news had spread even beyond that zone, so just erasing those memories of this group was not an option anymore. There was no other choice but to flee that place, leaving behind houses and the belongings they couldn't bring with them being reduced to ashes if not completely destroyed.

The wizards were angry, but none worse than the one that was supposed to be his father. He cursed him to that form and locked him up in the chamber to forever be the secret passed down from generation to generation, unable to live by the same magic. From my ancestors, that now I understood were also his, to my own eyes. 

Until I got there, being used as a weapon was all he knew. Less than a pet, just an object to be used and forgotten past graduation, like a little entertainment toy. Taking out whatever enemy, friend or annoyance out of the way the other wizards put in front of him. His venom was freely taken as many times they wanted to for whatever purposes they wanted to. Some are more adamant than others. Some are nastier than others. Now I understood why there were statues broken off while others got to pass the test of time. It wasn't that they were just old as I had assumed, it was that he couldn't even resist looking at them.

All of that was already a lot to take in, but that wasn't the part that most stood out for me. If nothing else, it finally made sense why he was so weirded out by my simple presence without ordering him around, by me wanting to spend time here with him without the need for carnage. No, the part that shook me was another one, the last piece of information he was willing to give me, the one he wanted to think about the least.

He never told his father that he had a muggle wife and a child on the way. In a way it was a good thing because he could hold on to the idea they both got to have a good life among their own, without having not even a clue of the indignity he has been subjected to. At the same time, that also meant that he could never contact them or even know about their fate. 

The first wizard that came after his father was the children of one of his many brothers. The base of that one had been lost a long time ago after he had knocked the rest of the statue. I didn't ask, and he didn't tell, but the hatred in his voice spoke volumes of what impression that one had left him with. I hated him too, without knowing his name, face or what he had done, simply because he dared to treat him with anything less than respect. But even that paled in comparison with the rage that the man who put him here in the first place inspired me. It seemed that the bad father portion was a curse we both shared.

When it came to his own family, the one he lost contact with, though, his voice turned quiet and his phrases short, as if talking anything more than that was still too painful, even after all these years. 

I don't really know why he felt the need to tell me any of that. Maybe he thought that would make me want to stop visiting so much? That whatever I had started already was going to stop because some bastard in my lineage was the bastard that also made him? If any of that was his intention, then I am afraid none of that came true. If anything, it has given me the next purpose for the rest of my years.

I always was planning to keep close for as long as I could. But after hearing about his background, I had a new purpose to dedicate myself to it and told him as such as soon the idea became clear in my mind. Someday I was going to break his curse and we both would get out of this castle together.

Which finally brings us to the reason why I am here speaking to you like this, dear journal. You see, breaking a curse as old as this one requires time, lots of study, trial and error. Wizards might live long, but we aren't immortal. 

I didn't care about living forever exactly, but I need as much time as I can gather and as long as I exist here then that is a little more time than another part of me had yesterday. In my own readings I had found out a little about this method to save someone's soul into an object. As long as the soul is attached to this plane, the wizard can't truly die. How many years would that give me? How many opportunities to try on?

At first he didn't believe me when I told him my plan. Why would he? As far he was concerned, I was still just the same kid that kept bothering him almost everyday and brought him food one time. I was only 16 after all. I could still change my mind. I could still meet a wizard or witch that would make life outside of this castle more interesting and worth living, or just get bored of him. He told me as such multiple times and at first I would feel the need to protest, to insist this is what I wanted, but that got tiresome and we never agreed so dropped it. If he wasn't going to believe my word, then I had no other choice but to make him believe with my actions.

My first actual kill was actually in part thanks to my dear friend. She loved to learn about magical creatures, but absolutely despised the professor for that subject. A brute that has no real love for any of the creatures he brought for class, just a sick need to show off his domination skills over them. He had beaten some of those poor creatures in front of them, insisting that was the only way that they were ever going to listen. When I told her about this, she didn't think for a second that I was joking and I adored her for it. Her smile was too precious as she told me to please bring her back one of his fingers to feed her cat with.

A precious gem she was. If it wasn't because of him, I might have been happy just living around her, causing who knows what kind of disasters and problems for everyone around us. As things turned out to be, I had decided on a different path for myself.

Bringing him down with me was so easy. I just had to tell him the truth, that there was a giant snake under the school, but I was too afraid to enter on my own and needed his assistance to decide what to do. Luckily for me, he was an idiot and so he didn't think to contact the headmaster first or any other of the professors. Probably he thought he alone was going to be enough to tame him and then he could get all praise for it. Just as much of an idiot as my dear lady friend had warned me about already.

When I paralyzed him, I presented his body once again but made a gesture to stop the massive fangs coming for him. He had already given me the sight of one of his kills. It was only fair that I gave him the sight of my first real one. Not the product of fear and desperation, but an actual conscious elimination of someone's life because they had already proven that they weren't fit for it. 

You can't just say the words and point with a wand. For this curse you have to actually know what you are doing, to want it, to not have a single doubt in your mind. To me it came as easy as breathing and the next second, that professor that no one was going to particularly miss was gone forever. 

That is how I came to be here. For this to work you have to take a life each time. I was willing to pay that price as many times as it was required if that meant helping him.

Lucifer, I did it for you. All of this is going to be for you. When I was looking into how to do it I finally understood the words I needed to make sense of it, but I didn't get to tell you. I hope I did it after the deed is done. I don't know. I can only be aware of everything that happened up to that point. I can at least tell you here.

I love you, Lucifer. I think I did the moment I saw you, but then you had to make it worse by actually welcoming me here. By letting me hear your voice and your laugh and letting me stay, I had no other option left. I was doomed the moment you did that because you couldn't bring yourself to kick me out. In a way, this is all your fault too. 

I am not complaining though. We can both share these blood stained hands, even if you don't have any. I know you aren't squeamish already. 

I have never felt more sure about something before. I want to live outside of those walls with you, for as long it's humanly possible and even after that. I won't let death separate us as long as there is a shred of me somewhere with any conscious left. I will find you and take you out of your prison no matter what.

This is my promise, my darling. 

[fanficshiddles]

The Call Of Fate, Chapter 4

The team were out on a mission for most of the day, so Jade was on her own around base. She mainly played bass and had a wander around the grounds since it was a nice day.

When the team returned, they were all in pretty bad shape and exhausted, aside form Loki and Thor. Who just had a few scratches left.

‘Geez, what happened to you guys?’ Jade asked as the team, apart from the Asgardians, headed to the nurse.

They all just grumbled on their way by. Loki stopped by her and leaned against the wall next to her. ‘To be fair, that was a tough one. Aliens, as per. But they had some high-tech weapons that made it rather difficult.’

‘But you and Thor got away without much harm?’ Jade asked.

Loki held his arm out, where there had been a big gash, but now it wasn’t much more than a cut and she could see it slowly healing up right before her eyes. ‘Holy crap!’

‘We heal at a much quicker scale than you mortals do.’ Thor said as he passed by.

‘Clearly!’ Jade laughed.

‘The others will be out for the count this evening, so at least we will get some peace for a while.’ Loki said as they made their way down the corridor.

‘Do you fancy getting pizza in and watching a movie or something?’ Jade suggested when they reached the common area.

‘That sounds’

‘What a great idea!’ Thor interrupted his brother.

They hadn’t noticed him sitting on the sofa, already with a bottle of beer.

Loki rolled his eyes. He had gotten his hopes up of spending the evening alone with Jade. Jade couldn’t deny she was a little disappointed too that it wasn’t just going to be her and Loki.

Once pizzas were ordered, the three of them sat down together to pick a movie. Which was an annoying task when the whole team was there, as they could rarely all decide on one to watch. But Jade was learning that it was likely the Asgardian brothers that were the main problem.

‘You’ve already watched that film over a hundred times.’ Loki said through gritted teeth as Thor started chanting for a film as Jade was flicking through the choices.

‘But it’s such a good film, you can’t deny it!’ Thor said excitedly.

‘There’s nothing wrong with watching a film multiple times, I’m guilty of it too.’ Jade said in Thor’s defense.

‘No, he has actually watched it more than a hundred times. Have you ever watched a film that much?’ Loki asked, raising an eyebrow at her.

‘What, literally?’ Jade asked, shocked, as she looked between the brothers, almost giving herself whiplash since she was sitting in the middle of them. Loki was sitting closer, their thighs were touching, something she was trying not to think about too much.

‘Yes, literally.’ Loki sighed.

‘I’ve got years on you, Jade. Plenty of time to watch movies.’ Thor laughed. ‘As I said, it is a GREAT film. Please can we watch it?’

‘No.’ Loki snarled, arms folded over his chest.

‘Jade has the remote, and she’s the lady here. So it’s her choice.’ Thor argued back. ���Pleaseeeee, Jade.’ He pleaded and tried giving her the puppy dog eyes.

‘Why don’t we watch something that none of us have seen?’ Jade suggested.

‘Brilliant idea.’ Loki said gleefully.

‘Aww.’ Thor pouted.

‘This looks good, I’ve heard it’s genuinely a scary film for a change, not the typical cheesy horror.��� Jade suggested and pulled up the description for the Gods to see.

‘Good choice.’ Loki agreed.

‘Looks alright.’ Thor hummed.

‘If either of you get scared, I’ll allow you to hold my hand if you need to.’ Jade teased as she pressed play.

Loki chuckled. ‘Oh, cupcake. If anything, it will be you needing to hold my hand.’

Right from the get go, the film was quite scary and had a lot of jump scare moments. Jade did jump a few times and even Thor and Loki did too once or twice. They were all completely hooked on the screen, not even speaking to one another.

So when the buzzer went off around the base, signaling there was someone needing in the gates, the three of them jumped out of their skin as it had been at a super tense moment in the film.

‘Well, pizza’s here.’ Jade laughed and paused the film.

‘I’ll go get it.’ Thor said as he summoned Mjolnir and flew off the sofa, straight out the room.

‘I thought Tony didn’t like him doing that inside?’ Jade asked Loki.

‘He doesn’t. That’s why I never tell him off for it.’ Loki smirked.

Thor was back within a minute, he’d almost given the poor delivery boy a heart attack when he arrived at the gate from the sky, mere seconds after he’d pressed the buzzer.

They’d ordered a bunch of pizzas and sides, Jade thought it was far too much food. But then she remembered the Asgardians did eat a lot more than mortals did. So she made sure to get her fill before it was all gone.

‘So what are we thinking so far of the film?’ Jade asked while they ate.

‘Not too bad, for a mortal horror film. It is actually one of the better ones.’ Thor commented.

‘I agree. To make us jump too, it’s a piece of art.’ Loki said.

‘It is not making me jump.’ Thor said.

‘It so is. I saw you jump.’ Jade said.

‘I was merely jumping because I could feel a change in the atmosphere, it happens often if there’s a thunderstorm due.’ Thor said sheepishly.

‘Yeah right. There’s no thunderstorms due at all.’ Jade said.

‘And I’ve never heard you say anything like that before, so you are most definitely lying. But you must have also forgotten, that I can actually tell when someone is lying.’ Loki said as he narrowed his eyes at Thor.

Thor rubbed the back of his head and then just stuffed some garlic bread into his mouth and muttered something that neither Jade nor Loki could understand.

After the three were happily full, they settled down again and watched the rest of the film. When it was finished, Jade let out a big breath.

‘Well, I’m not gonna lie, I am glad that’s over.’

‘You’re the one that picked it.’ Loki chuckled.

‘I’m not saying it wasn’t good, because it was. Just scarier than I anticipated.’ Jade shrugged.

‘Oh, is it really over though?’ Thor motioned to the screen where the credits were coming to an end. Thinking there might be an after-credit scene.

The screen went blank and there was no sound coming from it either. But the three of them sat there, waiting for something more. Jade even leaned forward a little bit, trying to anticipate another jump scare scene, no doubt.

‘RAHHH!’ Loki suddenly yelled out and grabbed Jade’s knee. She jumped out of her skin and let out a screech.

‘LOKI! You ass!’ She grabbed her cushion and whacked him with it, making him laugh.

‘You’re so mean.’ She whined but laughed too.

‘Had to wait for the most opportune moment, and that was it.’ He grinned mischievously and winked at her.

‘I’ll get you back for that one. I don’t forget.’ Jade said as she pointed at her eyes then at him.

‘Bring it on, cupcake.’ He smirked.

She shook her head but had a smile on her face.

‘Well, I’m off to bed. Good movie night guys.’ As she moved round the sofa, she ruffled up Loki’s hair cheekily before heading out.  

Once she was out of earshot, Thor looked over at Loki with a slight smirk and a raise of an eyebrow.

‘What?’ Loki barked at him when he continued to just stare and say nothing.

‘You like her.’ Thor commented simply.

Loki raised an eyebrow at him. ‘Of course I do. Don’t you?’

‘Not in the way you do. You know what I mean, Loki.’

Loki leaned back and looked at the TV instead, flicking through the channels. ‘I like her as much as I like the rest of you.’ He hummed.

‘If any of the rest of us had ruffled your hair like that, we’d have been tossed out the window quicker than you could say boo. You didn’t even flinch when she did it.’ Thor said knowingly. ‘Plus, you’ve given her a nickname, a cute one too. Not a mean one.’

Loki rolled his eyes and rose to his feet. ‘Drop it, Thor. She’s to be wed to another Prince anyway. So it’s pointless.’ He went to leave.

‘Brother, wait.’ Thor was surprised when Loki did actually stop in his tracks and glanced over his shoulder at Thor.

‘We have plenty of time to come up with a plan to get her out of this arranged marriage.’

Loki turned away again but didn’t move yet. Just waited a moment.

‘I don’t think there will be a way to get her out of it, Thor. But thanks for the hope, anyway.’

[balanmlpfurryandmore-confessions]

~1~

"So what your saying is that theater is abandoned?", Emma said with a hint of curiosity.

"Yeah and I wanna check it out! Come on Em it'll be fun! I gotta prove to our friends I'm no chicken!", Leo eagerly stated while jumping with excitement.

The two kids were always close by eachother, thick and thieves, however this time Emma was a bit unsure about the antics the two might get into.

Before she knew it Leo was running to the theater entrance to take pictures. Emma looked closely at the exterior, a beautiful look really, despite it's clear decay. The two snooped inside and found old movie posters framed along the walls, the people in the posters looked... familiar?

"Hey Leo?"

"Yeah Em?"

"Dont these people look familiar? The actors on these posters."

Leo looked at one, a farmer guy that looked just like the local corn farmer Jose.

"Yeah... super strange.... say.. when was the last time we heard from Mr. Jose? Like a week ago? Maybe we can ask him why hes in this spooky poster in this old place."

Emma felt a chill run down her spine suddenly and looked around starting to feel uneasy,

"Yeah.. let's get out of here and go ask then?"

"Come on Emma, dont chicken out now we literally just got here.. just a few pictures and we'll go okay?", Leo didnt let her answer as he ran off again snapping pictures determined to show his friends at school that hes the bravest.

Emma tried to stay close by, it was getting darker and darker. In the darkness she failed to see the dark pierrot that made a grab at the two and dragged them into a strange world unlike their own. It was as they fell that another clown showed their face, one with a wide eerie smile that seemed as if it were stitched into place. She couldnt see his eyes or really much of his head due to a huge hat.

After that she blacked out and would later wake up to the clown she saw nursing her hurt arm. The clown wasnt wearing that insane hat now so she got to see his sweet features and honey colored doe eyes.

It was a shame that the moment he noticed she was awake he rushed to hide that beautiful face like before. He must have thought himself ugly or something.

"Hello mr.... what's your name?"

"My names Balan, it's less a name and more so a concept... I'm a maestro balan, a being that embodies joy and purity."

Emma almost wasnt listening, she just was not expecting that voice, that sweet deep tone to just roll out of the beautiful clown. She finally remembered the extremely important detail,

"Wait, wheres my friend Leo? I came in with him... all I remember is falling into something with him and.. well I felt almost like I died if I'm honest.", that idea gave her the chills even if she knew better of it.

"He got taken, we all had a nasty fall and I could only keep you in my arms and away from my worst half. Lance took your friend, hes been taking people for a while and I cant figure out why...", Balan said all this with a bit of annoyance mixed with hate, this Lance guy clearly got under his skin.

Emma got worried at that, multiple people being taken? Taken where exactly and why? We're they alive?? Being eaten as they spoke!?

"Oh god, how do we save my friend? Or the others?? They must be so scared right now...", Emma bit her lip, she could practically hear Leo now saying she needed to stop being such a scaredy cat. This whole trip was a huge mistake.

"We can save them, but I need your help Emma. Humans are durable and can walk through negativity with ease, you can get through and rescue your friend and together we can free the others and restore balance."

Emma couldn't help but raise an eyebrow,

"A balance?"

"Yes a balance, keep up kid. Context clues would tell ya if I'm purity Lance is impure. So that would mean..." Balan gestured to Emma into finish his thought.

"So that would mean we need to restore balance by taking down Lance?"

The absolute sass of the clown in front of her was making her feel stupid as he gestured to say essentially, uh yeah duh.

"Anyway...", balan went on and straightened his clothes, "Come on little one, let's go get your friend and save the others. Assuming their alive that is."

Hope you all enjoyed that. Might due more when my hands arent tired.

This is basically bww but as told as if it was a Goosebumps story, sass and all.

[topazadine]

And the thing is that these nurses will use their power against anyone they judge, think has caused their own suffering, or whatever. (TW for medical trauma, medical neglect, slutshaming, misogyny)

When I was in high school, I suffered a ruptured hemorrhagic ovarian cyst. I was absolutely pouring blood. Drenched two of those puppy pad things. I straight up could have died, that's how bad the blood loss was. I'd been bleeding most of the day and only cracked and begged my dad to come get me around the end of the school day because I was literally hunched over on the floor, crying, chalk white from pain.

My idiot father took me to the peds ICU for some goddamn reason even though I was like 15 or 16 and absolutely should have been sent to the adult ICU for a ruptured ovarian cyst.

I told them, having been diagnosed with PCOS the year prior, that I thought it was a ruptured ovarian cyst because I'd read up on my condition and knew it was a possibility, and the pain was only on one side of my body. They didn't believe me because apparently I was just a dumb lying teenager.

Not only did the nurses ignore me in favor of oohing and ahhing over a newborn baby, but they catherized me, pumped my bladder full of fluid, and left me there.

For three hours.

While they "waited for imaging." With a little Tylenol to tide me over. Oh, thanks.

Imagine having a full bladder, for three hours, while you are pouring blood from an ovarian cyst, in immense pain, terrified of how much you are bleeding, scared and wanting your mom (my father was a bastard and absolutely no help, and my mom was off on a business trip), and the nurses just.

Ignore you. For three hours. Because they've got better shit to do I guess. Don't check on you except to throw another puppy pad under you and then leave again.

Then, I got imaging, and they realized, "oh shit you have a ruptured ovarian cyst and it's pouring blood," and suddenly they couldn't get me out of there fast enough. Like basically pushing me out the fucking door, telling me to take a Tylenol and giving me a permission slip to stay out of school the next day. No actual pain relief, no aftercare instructions, nothing. Just "oh well maybe it'll stop or something idk, bye."

It was only months later that I realized that they likely were "punishing" me because they thought I'd been having a miscarriage as a teenager. I wasn't even sexually active at the time.

They then realized they'd been totally fucking wrong after forcing me to lay there with a full bladder for three hours. That I had told them what it was and they had ignored it in favor of being judgmental little shits. And that if I wanted to, I could have gotten them all in serious trouble for ignoring a patient whose room looks like a murder scene while they busy themselves squealing over babies.

Being in the peds unit (again, my father is an idiot), they likely didn't even consider that it could have been ovarian cyst. But instead of, you know, consulting with literally anyone else, they shoved me in a room and ignored me because of their own prejudices. They likely believed I was lying about not being sexually active because my dad was there, because why believe a stupid teenager? Then when they realized they were absolutely wrong, they got me out of there as soon as possible so I couldn't protest.

It was an absolute nightmare, and I hate that they got away with it because I was too young and scared to call out their bullshit, and my father was useless.

(This was at Endeavor Health Northwest Community Hospital in Arlington Heights, IL, around 2008 or 2009. I have no idea how terrible they are now, but I'd advise against going there because fuck them.)

On the plus side, though, it taught me to advocate for myself. Medical professionals have tried to use my mental illness against me multiple times - such as gaslighting me into thinking I'd signed up for group medication management when I distinctly remembered saying I wanted individual treatment - and I call them on it every fucking time. I have walked out of therapy appointments because of bad vibes. I get the ombudsman involved when I have to.

When doctors are extremely late, I go up to the receptionist and tell them to reschedule me and that this behavior is utterly unacceptable. I tell them that I will refuse to pay the copay if they attempt to charge me so they better get ready to eat the cost. And doctors hate it, and I absolutely do not care.

If your patients are always demons to you and calling your ass out, maybe YOU are the problem, not the patients. It's one thing to get a few assholes every once in a while. It's another thing if you're getting so many that you feel the need to get a little snarky pin.

You just better hope you don't run into a patient like me who is more than happy to get you in trouble for being an asshole.

surely it's not just me who finds those fucking "be nice, I'm in charge of the pills" pins you sometimes see doctors and nurses wearing in pretty bad taste right? like the *point* is a stand against being mistreated by patients but like...yea you are in charge of the pills and can arbitrarily deny care to people, not really sure why that's something to gloat about? like the number of stories especially of black women being totally denied painkillers in hospital and stuff because the nurses were assholes it's like....maybe you can have your snarky pins when you're not in the position to medically torture someone? idk

like you get people rushing to defend it like "you don't know what it's like working in a hospital" but like...i do sure as hell know what it's like being mistreated by medical professionals. I'm not even getting paid to be here. it's kinda fucking evil when you think about it for more than a second.

[theinkeddragon]

Make me choose meme

Characters: Your bosses

Literally anything else: Your AUs

:)

I regret my decision /lh /j

Characters: my bosses

Ohhh hhyou motherfucker I have to pick! I love em all! I love them all so much. .. ...

I gotta say Boss) he was the first, the one I played through all the games with my first run around, hell he's what kick started the entirety of GOW&R. I adore Lady, and if I could choose more than fucking one I'd choose them both. and if Knight counted, I'd be choosing her too.

Literally anything else: my AUs

HRHHRNNNRNRNNGNRNNGNRNHHRRRRR-

I Am The Boss.

I love GoW&R, it's the one where most if not all of the lore stems from, it is my baby, it is the one I'm making a fucking COMIC about (Blightfall & Bleeding purple are getting comics too, but GoW&R is the one I'm like... WORKING working on.)

But, if I had to choose a favorite, IATB. Because I really like the idea of a universe where Johnny is forced to be the boss. I adore that idea that loss broke him so much where he took the torch, even if he really didn't want to.

Cause IATB Gat is fucking traumatized dude. Lost both Aisha & Kira in the same day. Then later, after a week of convincing himself otherwise, found Lupus (the old boss) dead, and only after that realized he was in love with Lupus. It fucks him up! It gave him a panic attack disorder he can't control because everything he'd been ignoring or suppressing vomited up at once! Like, it makes him distance himself from everyone around him, to the point even if someone can tell something is wrong, he can deflect it easily! He completely gave up on any type of relationship: casual intimacy, friendships, romantic relationships, familial relationships, all of them.

Cause he's fucking scared! He thinks he deserves to hurt!

And then Jake (Yes the same one from GoW&R, being a voidwalker just changed his life path so drastically that he has an entirely different body build) crashes in and ruins that distance by just... being so fucking persistent. And because Gat wanted to 'keep an eye on' (he did not. He wanted to kill him. Nurse disagreed. And Nurse is currently the only one with a vague closeness to him. So he, with a fuss, listened to Nurse.) him after Jake tried to break into his apartment. Cause while Nurse (Lady, in this universe) won't let him kill Jake (He likes the company), that doesn't mean he can't throw him around a bit (A lot.). And then it backfires because Jake

Decided to be petty and take 'never be let out of sight' as literal as he could and glue himself to Gat's side as much as possible. Which turns into them becoming friends. Which turns into them dating. (Can you guess who develops feelings for who first? Can you guess who realizes it first? Can you guess when the confession happens? Hint: It's not Jake, It's not Gat, and it's not without nearly dying.)

Can see Kira (Deer) and Lupus. Because Valor made Kira a voidwalker after her death, but since she was still... dead, it didn't bring her back, it just made her a part of the void; So only other voidwalkers can see her. And then she proceeded to capture Lupus's soul, so he's now the only ghost in known existence. And also a part of the void. So both of them have been watching Gat decline since their deaths and been able to do nothing about it, cause they're not IN the mortal plane. So when someone who can SEE THEM waltz's in, they are very eager to work with him, even as his goals change. (from just doing his job, to genuine concern) Not to fix him single handily, but to actually get him on the road to not being a fucking mess.

There's. I have a lot to say on the story and why I love them. I need to draw their redesigns (I do got picrews if anyone's interested)

[arcane-abomination]

hello, my names angel.

i'm here to ask a question that would help a very internal battle right now, i'm not sure if you can answer and no need to feel pressured. please ignore this is it's too much, etc.

but, i wanted to ask - i've had six animals this year / last year pass. all of old age / old age complications, and you might be saying "damn, that's a lot and i'm right there with you (i did everything i could which is why i'm so perplexed). my rabbit, domino was the first animal of mine to pass and after her, it's literally like she caused a domino effect. my hamster went next, then my two rats, my dog, and today my fish.

i've always had this deeply overwhelming empathy towards animals, in ways, way too much. i thought for a while that maybe all this death was meant to be, I've had one hell of a life and one of the only basic human emotions i hadn't experienced yet was grief. death scared the shit out of me most of my life and it was like the universe was telling me that it was time to experience it. after domino died, death became something… beautiful to me? almost peaceful. i became obsessed with animal bones (in a healthy way) and how strangely beautiful the unknown / creepy is.

i've been involved with my craft since i was 12 years old and i want to ask if experiencing so much death can be a sign that i should get into death work? like, am i attracting death because of some sort of energy i have? (not to sound egotistical lol). and i don't mean bad death, but in a way like, am i meant to help these animals pass?

i say this because one of my rats and my fish, i had to nurse in their final days. i had to medicate my fish and hand feed / keep my rat warm. my hamster passed in my arms. it was like i was helping them pass on but does that sound too nice to be true?

am i attracting death in a bad way? is it a curse? i don't know and i know this is a lot so please do ignore and pretend this doesn't exist if you please

but if you do try to answer, i appreciate it either way. thank you for listening.

please have a good day, thank you.

Hello there! Thank you for trusting me to answer this question! Here is my answer coming from what I know and what I’ve learned in my years.

Are you attracting death? No, not unless you’re mistreating them, and from what I read I don’t believe you are. Death is a natural thing that comes to us all. It comes to everything in different ways and at different times. So why does this feel like it’s all happening at once? Well for starters, you said death scared you, so having it happen to your rabbit might have made you extra aware of its presence. As a rabbit owner myself I can say that while rabbits can live up to about 10 years or so depending on the breed they are actually very difficult to look after properly. They can get sick super easily and as you said all your animals were old. And old rabbits especially often get sick very quickly from seemingly nowhere.

Then there’s your hamster and rats. Unfortunately rodents have a notoriously short life span. Typically only 2 to 3 years on average. So them dying so close together is very plausible. Especially if you got them around the same time. Same thing with certain breeds of fish. Having animals that die quickly can seem ultra overwhelming to some people especially when you have multiple passing so close together. Your dog as well was most likely just a coincidence.

Now is this a sign? Well no but also a little yes? Signs are signs because they have meaning and while I don’t believe you’re attracting death or that the universe sought out to kill all your animals to make you face your fear, it’s a reality that always brought you such discomfort so you most likely just really REALLY noticed it’s presence as you have. Feeling it as a sign to work with death magick and heal/build your relationship with death is definitely a good idea and I would most definitely say you should go with that feeling.

Now again, this is just my interpretation. I don’t know if others with have something different to say or not but in any case I hope that I’ve helped you even a little.

[georgeweasleyslostearhq]

ITS OBVIOUS

Pairing: Eddie munson x reader

Summary: you had a crush on your oblivious best friend, but Dustin tells you its obvious you like him

Warnings: none

"Ok, ok fine! I'll tell you" I sighed in frustration.

Dustin had been pestering me to tell him who I liked for weeks now, ever since I blurted out the words 'no, i like someone else' ages ago he's made it his job to find out who it was.

"Who! Who! Tell me oh my god" he giggled

I didnt want to say it out loud, incase anyone heard, we were in the library so it wouldn't be hard for anyone to hear the loud Henderson's cheers.

I ripped a piece of paper from one of my books and wrote down the name:

Eddie

I slid the peice of paper towards the curly headed boy watching a smirk grow on his face

"I know" he said

"What?" I questioned him

"I've known for ages" he laughed

"How long!" I whisper shouted

"Since the beginning of the year" Dustin shrugged

"I didnt even know then!" I rubbed my forehead.

"Well you make it quite obvious" if the boy had glasses, he would've pushed them up, but he doesn't so he just scrunched his nose

"Obvious! Do I? Does he know? He cant know, oh god" I throw my head back and groan

"Calm down. It's not that bad, I would just tell him" he suggested

"Tell him, have you gone mad? That's the dumbest thing you've ever said" I glared at him

"He might like you too, it's not the worst idea in the world"

My mind wondered off to how in the hell this boy knows. And although he is a genius, if he was able to figure it out even before I did, was anybody else able to. Does anybody else know? Gareth? Mike? Lucas? Eddie?

"I'm never going to tell him, he cant know, so don't. tell. Him." I state, but seeing the boy smile. I start to regret telling him.

"I won't" I dont trust him.

"Promise?" I warned

"I promise" he placed his hand over his heart and smiled sweetly

I sighed in distress as the bell went

~~~

"Ok, just act normal" Dustin said as we walked into the cafeteria, already seeing all the boys at the table, conversing.

"Normal? Do you even know me Dusty? I'm literally the opposite of normal" I furrowed my eyebrows

"Well then just be yourself" he replied

Be yourself, I repeated in my head.

Be yourself

Be yourself

Be yourself

"Hello, Henderson. Y/n" Eddie greeted with a welcoming smile.

"Hi guys!" Dustin waved while I tightly smiled to them.

That's not being myself. Laugh, you laugh all the time, that's normal for you, laugh.

I awkwardly laughed out loud. Far out

"What's so funny?" Gareth asked

"Huh? Oh I dont know" I sat down in my spot, the left of Eddie. All the boys look confused but just go back to talking like always

"So, Y/n. How was your weekend?" Eddie asked me.

"It was ok, I guess" I shrugged and stuffed my face in with some fries

"Are you ok?" He questioned

"Just fine, thanks"

"Ok then" he just nodded with a disappointed look on his face. I felt a bit bad.

I hadn't acted like this before, i think it's just knowing that other than me, someone else definitely knows my secret, and knowing that the other might know scared me. But if he did know, why wouldn't he say anything. Not even to reject me?

"Hey!" I missed in pain as I felt Dustin kick my under the table

'Normal' he mouthed. 'Talk to him, dont ignore him'

I sighed.

"How's your weed?" I blurt out as I turn to the long haired boy.

"What?" He said confused

"Uh, the weeds. Outside your trailer, have you gotten them out yet?" I panicked

"There is no weeds? Are you sure you're ok. Do you need to go to the nurse's office?" He pushed his fringe away from his eyes.

"I'm ok" I looked down at my clammy hands

He nodded his head, not fully believing me, but dropping the subject.

~~~

"What the hell was that?, you call that being yourself?" Dustin practically laughed.

"I got nervous" I whined, putting my head in my hands.

"You've been hiding it for ages, just do what you've been doing" he suggested

"Its not that easy"

~~~

"Woah, he said that" Dustin stared wide eyed at me.

"Yeah"

Eddie and I had a fight yesterday, I said I couldn't go to the campaign due to some family shit and he told me he didn't want me and he would've preferred someone like Chrissy there instead.

Obviously that upset me, do I got up and walked out of the cafeteria. He followed after me, saying it was a joke and he didnt mean it but it still hurt. I wasn't as pretty as someone like Chrissy, so when he said he preferred her, my mind went straight to calling myself 'ugly'

"Why do you hate me?" I questioned Eddie

"What- I- I dont hate you" he stuttered

"Well it seems like you do" I crossed my arms in defense.

"I'm sorry" he apologised

"So tell me why you hate me" I cried out

"I don't" he defended

"Well you don't like me" I looked down and let out a big breath go

"Well I-"

"Make up your mind" I cut him off before walking away from him, showing him that I'm no longer interested in talking any more than that.

I turned a corner and let myself sink down against the wall. Shutting my eyes tightly and letting a hot tear roll down my cheek. a bit dramatic, I know.

"Y/n, I know it hurt you but I dont think he really meant it in a rude way, it was just a joke" Dustin reasoned

"Yeah well there was really no reason for that, all I did was say I couldn't go to the game tonight. I didn't say anything other than that" I shook my head.

"Just talk it out. I'm sure he doesn't really prefer Chrissy"

"Well I dont exactly want to talk to him right now" I responded

"Ok, well take your time" he patted my back for comfort

~~~

I walked out to my mailbox, my father had been too lazy to get up so he yelled out for me to do it for him.

I opened it to find a few letters. One marked for mum, another one for my dad, and another letter.

A letter with a the name Y/n written messily. It wasn't in an envelope, so if mustn'tve been important, or not formal, to say the least.

I walked inside the house and put the letters down on the coffee table, the letter addressed to me still in my grasp. I quickly walked in my room and shut the door. Jumping on my bed and unfolded the letter.

It was really messy, and a lot was scribbled out. but I could read some of it.

Y/n

I am sorry ------------------ i really want you to know i didnt mean what I said, I guess --------------- upset --------------------. You ------------ to me. I care --------- a lot. This whole fight was stupid, and I'm really sorry I had to say it in a letter and not in person. I guess, what I'm trying to say is that I didnt mean it and --------------------------- I'm sorry.

Even if I couldn't understand some of it, I understood where he was going.

So I decided to write one to him.

I spent over an hour deciding what to write and scribbling things out.

By the end of it, I had basically wrote him an essay. I didn't want to send it. But I felt like it had to be said.

~~~

"Hey" Eddie awkwardly greeted as he saw me outside the school. He was leaning on the brick wall like he was waiting for me, with a joint between his fingers.

"Hi" I said as I avoided eye contact. He took a hit from the joint and stepped onto it as he dropped it on the ground outside the front doors of the school.

"So, How are you" he stood tall, pressing up against me as a way to push past the people in the hallway

"I'm ok. You?" I looked around anxiously

"I'm fine. I got your letter, it meant a lot to me, it really did, and I want you to know I'm really sorry" he announced

"Thanks, that's means a lot" I smiled tightly, trying to put this all at ease

"Tell him" I see Dustin mouth in my direction

"No" I said out loud at him

"Sorry?" Eddie turned to me and raised an eyebrow

"Sorry, I just thought of something" I shook my head sheepishly and looked down at my moving feet

"That's ok, so um-" he started

"Look I should really go, I have some things I have to get to before class" I lied. I was trying to avoid him, I just knew I would blurt another thing out and embarrass myself even more.

"Oh- okay then, I'll speak to you later then- I guess" he whispered as I started backing away from him

~

I watched him as he talked. They way his jaw moved as he spoke. The way his nose flared as someone cut him off, the way he would play with his rings as he waited, or the way he slightly stuck his tongue out in concentration. I loved it when he did all those. It was like a show that I could watch all day and never get tired of.

But it was different when it was just for me.

He stood in front of me as I stared at him in awe, It was in between a class, but it was ok, cause I had a free period which I usually just spend in the library.

"Y/n, are you listening to me?" He snapped his fingers in front of my face

"Sorry? What did you say?" My body shook out of my body, nervous and a messy state as he probably caught me.

"I was asking if you wanted to maybe hang out later?" He asked politely, with a small smile on his face

"Well I dont really, you know I don't do drugs or smoke so-"

"No! No- that's, that's not what I meant, or implied I meant just hang out in general, like friends do" he explained

Like friends

"Like friends do...I'll think about it" I spoke softly and smiled

"Ok, well I'm free tonight, or the next, and the next, I'm free whenever basically, you know I'm not mister popular around here so" he chuckled. I laughed along.

"You're telling me, freak" some jock said as he walked passed

"He's a dickhead, you're not a freak" I beamed at him before I turned around and went to library.

~

"Jeez, Dusty, it's like you're everywhere" I breathed out a chuckle

"Have you told him yet" he asked

"No, Dusty, I haven't, and I never will, he doesn't like me so just forget it" I groaned as he sat next to me

"You dont know that, there's a chance he does" he smiled widely

"And there's a the more possible chance that he doesn't, now just stop, I regret telling you so much" I said, banging my head on the table over and over again

"Come on, I haven't told anyone! Stop worrying! We keep having this conversation and it's going to go nowhere unless you say something to him, when no body is around and it's just you two, tell him" he pleaded

"Dustin, I don't think you understand, I don't want him to know, and even if I told him it will go nowhere cause he doesn't like me" I stood up and gathered my things

"You dont know that! For all we know he could" he stood up as well

"COULD! he COULD! that's the problem, he doesn't like me, but he COULD! if he does, he should tell me but he's not so he doesn't. Thank you, Dustin, for trying to cheer me up but it's not helping and it's not working so just stop. He could never like someone like me when there's people out there like Chrissy!" I cry out, the librarian looks furious and the people around us looks annoyed, but Dustin just stares at me in a guilty manner. But I noticed his eyes weren't exactly set on me.

My eyes grew wide as I heard a painfully familiar voice

"Who doesnt like you?" They asked

"YOU" Dustin yelled out at him

Fuck.

---------------------------------------------------

There might be a part 2, if you want so just tell me.

This kinda based on something that happened with me a few days ago so. 🤣

@tommyriddleobsessed @bellevsoares

[zuretha-metal]

Update 8/27/23

Hey, y'all. These oast couple months have been interesting. One of my physicians is moving on to the biggest and best job, my favorite coworkers quit, and we're officially down two nurses in-clinic. Podcasts might literally be the only thing holding me together, lol.

Penumbra S5: Okay, so this season so far has just sort of... made me cry? It wasn't much of a tearful reunion in Juno, but listening to them bicker like the old days and get back to the basics (the first thing that drew me in about this show was the space noir private eye vibes) was refreshing. So refreshing, in fact, that I went back and re-listened to, "The Case of the Murderous Mask", "The Train From Nowhere" -- the end of Season 1, Season 3 in it's entirety, and then I re-listened to Season 4 just to listen to Juno and Nureyev be in love and listen to Juno pine. The lady has some big emotions, and I love him for it. As for Second Citadel, that first scene of Season 5 hits like... really hard. And I was so scared for Talfrin, but then Angelo was there. The second he swooped in and announced himself, I started sobbing. I'm glad Damien was able to be reunited and that they've learned what is happening to their world. Quanyii is a little scary right now but I think I would be too if I took a magic edible and bad tripped my way through the Mirrored Planes and gained horrible knowledge and as soon as I woke up, I found out the love of my life had gone missing and the place was getting bombed. Definitely an understandable reaction. Our little lizard kissing boquet made me cry at the end of the episode. You know why. Last season brought everyone together only for this season to send them sprawling apart to possible doom.

Desert Skies -- I didn't get to listen to much of this yet, but it is a trip. If their frozen burrito aisle didn't send me, the fact that they refer ghosts glitching and having unfinished business by using the acronym "SUB"bing has my absolutely dying. I have no idea how to explain any of this to anyone, and it's still like...weirdly well-written. It's wholesome for being so, so nuanced.

Midnight Burger -- KB got burnt out about halfway through the second season. Still, I've got about 4 new episodes the listen to, and I'm very excited. We have a chaplain at our hospital who does the same three prayers on a loop, but she prays so nice it reminds me of Effie, and I actually feel better after hers.

Batman: The Audio Adventures -- This is great to listen to. It gives me spooky noir detective vibes and also lets me simp over a man who can't eat dinner until 2:22 in the morning because he's got two occupants in his mind. These voice actors are so good, and they paint a picture of Gotham that is so immersive and interesting. I had to stop listening so my boyfriend could catch up, so I'm excited to listen to more.

Things are so busy right now as our clinic transitions to make sure we can still see patients, and also because I've accepted a position in as an extra in a dinner theater production. Our first rehearsal is tonight, so wish me luck!

My Running Favorite Podcasts List:

The Penumbra Podcast - Juno Steel mysteries. I've dipped my toes into Second Citadel, not sure if I want to sacrifice my soul for it just yet. As for Juno's stuff, I would die for every member of the Carte Blanche and the first episode still gives me chills, even on the fourth relisten.

Welcome To Night Vale - my first podcast. My favorite baby. I listened to this thing walking the mile to and from campus and the mile across the highway to work for a year. I based my marching band tech assignments in Night Vale 's school district. Go Scorpions! (The web address is floating around somewhere out there if you're interested in the Big Rico's Sell-A-Slice fundraiser for new marching band uniforms!)

Good Morning Night Vale - Great recaps of episodes and the cast are just...abolsute goblins. Very feel-good. Good for my soul, good for yours, good for the All Mighty Glow Cloud's - all hail ❤

The Two Princes - Absolutely lovely. Short, dynamic, and absolutely charming. I listened to this one a while back and don't remember much except a totally relateable main character, a cursed forest -- also lots of gayness and a flying ship. Beauty and grace.

The Orbiting Human Circus - Strange. Very Pan's Labyrinth in the realm of, "reality?" I love the music and the old-timey feel. Still picking my way through the Naughty Till New Year's collection, but I'm a sucker for the stories they bring to the table.

The Magnus Archives - I cried a bunch. Made art. It's beautiful. The only smart man in this podcast is Joshua Gillespie. Amen to my man with all the braincells who said, "Put the key in a bowl of water and freeze it." I, of course, picked all of the stupid people as my favorites and all of them are dead. Except one.

Marsfall - Just started this one. Chaos. Amazing imagery. Also ANDI - I'd die for that sweet boy. And for some reason it just makes me think of Starkid's Starship? Bc like, it's detrimental AND campy. Excellent.

[rxttingsblog]

𖤐 More than evil 𖤐

﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌﹌

Summary: What would be Henry creel’s reaction to a demon!reader ?? (headcanons)

A/N: decided to do some reactions if 001/henry encountered a demon!reader. I thought the idea was unique and plus no one has done it yet. sorry if this isn’t the best! i’m new to this lmao

—Henry creel/001/Peter ballard x GN!demon!reader <3

•••

You were different from everyone else the moment you were born. Born with multiple abilities, different features that were non-human, this caused your own family to admit you to Hawkins laboratory. But little did your parents know their big mistake.

Initially, Brenner thought you were only born with abilities. He didn’t think you were a supernatural creature. The man was planning on doing experiments on you in order to add more lab rats. But bro literally thought you were human. So did all the other nurses, guards, orderlies, including Henry himself.

GOOD LORD, THEY UNDERESTIMATED YOU LIKE BIG TIME.

You had this whole demonic form that you could control. But sometimes if you went out of control the form would magically come out? it’s complicated. you didn’t understand what you were nor how powerful you truly were.

It was one day out of the blue, you were alone just chilling in the rainbow room when 002 and his band of fuck ups began messing with you, insulting you, mocking you, etc. You weren’t the type of person to take shit.

So you snapped. like big time. you scared the shit out of 002 and his gang with your demonic form. So of course they flipped the fuck out and Brenner saw this whole situation unfold on the cameras and everything. You were doomed because Brenner had some extreme punishment methods.

Your demon form was unsettling but also exotic at the same time. You gave off an odd/evil presence. Your eyes black as night with no sign of any emotion, pointed horns on the top of your head, razor sharp teeth, tattered wings, your wings were like bat wings. Your nails also formed into extremely pointy claws. Your appearance often scared the living shit out of people.

Let’s say, right after you snapped, Brenner was in complete and utter shock over your truest form and it wasn’t long until he announced you as a feral patient. You on the other hand, were very confused. What was going on? Why were cruel guards locking you up in a padded cell and chaining you up? No one ever expected this and the whole lab was planning on killing you. This was something Henry wasn’t aware of. (yet)

Meanwhile, before Brenner locked you up for going feral. Henry was kindly offering Eleven some training advice before that whole mess occurred. He never took interest in you at first until that fatel incident. He watched it unfold in front of him with his very own eyes. Let’s just say that’s when everything took a turn for the worst.

He was never the type to feel anything, the only true emotion he could really experience was undying rage that only got stronger by being caged in this prison. laboratory

From that moment onwards, an ongoing obsession was unleashed then and there. After he saw how powerful you truly were that’s when he became impressed by you, fascinated by you, you were even more powerful than Eleven and possibly him which he didn’t want to believe.

Henry has multiple feelings about you. He’s obsessed with you, fascinated by your very existence, loves how you’re a creature from a different dimension, but also heavily envies you. He doesn’t know whether or not he wants your abilities or you.

It’s not long until he starts wanting you by his side to change the world however he sees fit. He is truly shocked by how powerful you two would be combined. With your help he could have anything he desired. This world could be his and your little toy.

Henry knows about the cruel and oppressive restrictions on you, but that doesn’t stop him. You’re trapped in a cell and he knows what cell because when he was on the night shift he overheard your faint cries from the cell at the very end of the corridor. He took note of that and usually every night while everyone was sleeping he’d visit you and gain your trust by talking to you/comforting you. He was manipulating you but he also liked you.

You ended up telling him about your past life and how you were born this way. Little did you know is that you were just like Henry and he admired that. Henry has always wanted to find someone who was just like him and now he finally has it.

At this point, Henry forgot about Eleven. He originally was going to escape with her but instead he wanted you. You were older, and actually born with more interesting abilities that were never heard of or spoken of by mankind. Henry then tells you about his plan to escape and this is when he asks you to help him take the infuriating soteria that was implanted in the side of his neck.

You obliged, the moment the two of you were alone in the boiler room that was located in the debts of the lab, you hastily removed the soteria with no issue at all. But since you had those restrictions it wasn’t long until guards came rushing in to take you away. But Henry killed the both of them right in front of you. At first, you weren’t fearful because those people were trying to harm you.

This is the part where he tells you to wait in the storage closet. But you weren’t that dumb. You were a demon after all so you knew when something bad was about to happen. You scented that something fucked up was happening behind closed doors and that’s when you exited the storage closet. The foul scent of fresh blood filled your nostrils, the fluorescent lights flickering, followed by agonizing screams. You quickly sprinted towards the rainbow room and as you predicted, Henry killed everyone. Only you were the last one alive.

Now, this is when he gives you that entire edgy ass speech. You don’t say a word and only listen, trying to comprehend everything. After that’s over, this is the part where he asks you to join him. Joining him would mean taking over the world and officially ending the existence of humans.

If you say yes: He will be thrilled, absolutely thrilled and you two would be an unstoppable power couple. He also wouldn’t judge you because of your form. He actually thinks you’re very beautiful/handsome and would probably worship the ground you walk upon. His favorite thing about you is the horns you can manifest. Despite being psychotic, he’s also a strangely good caretaker. So he would provide you with love and affection. The two of you would go out killing every night. Scaring the entire city and cursing Hawkins. You do most of the work since you have more of the power but Henry makes sure to help you. Honestly, half of him is still secretly jealous of you but he tries his best to brush it off.

If you say no: Henry wouldn’t be surprised, he’s be disappointed in you that you couldn’t join him because that means he did all this for nothing. For the first time, he feels threatened. So he’ll have no choice but to kill you. But since you’re so powerful it’s clear who’s going to win. Henry isn’t the type to runaway though so he’s going to try and fight you and get his revenge. But of course you win the battle and that’s when you send him to the upside down. Because you have the ability to control different dimensions. So when Henry is sent there he ends up dying instead of becoming Vecna. You feel bad, but you knew you had to do this.

(I hope you enjoyed these cheesy headcanons! I’m trying to post shit that seems unoriginal but i don’t think i’m doing the best job. comments/reblogs are greatly appreciated!)

—made by Willard

[goodoldfashionedthoughtcrimes]

When I was about 12 years old I noticed this white stuff in my underwear. It was goopy and creamy but when it dried it became crusty. I had no idea what it was. I hoped that if I ignored it it would go away- it didn’t. Eventually I became worried. I thought that I might be slowly pissing myself, but the texture wasn’t right for that. I considered that I might be intersex, have testes, and that they might somehow be leaking. I wanted to ask someone about it, but because of the inherent shame and tabooness around women’s bodies I was too embarrassed to do so. I figured that even if I did ask someone, they wouldn’t be able to help me. I thought that this white stuff in my underwear was a result of me being a dirty freak.

I felt so much shame around my body. I was terrified of sleepovers or locker rooms or anywhere else where someone might see what’s in my underwear. I carried this shame for almost two years.

Then one day a friend’s mother drove me home from school. This woman kept some kind of puberty pamphlet in the back of the car for us to read. I happened to pick it up and read part of it. The section I read taught me that this “white stuff” in my underwear is called vaginal discharge, it happens to all women, it begins anywhere from a year to a week before your first period, and it’s part of my vagina’s healthy natural functions.

I was so reliveved to know that what I was experiencing was normal, but I was also furious. Less than 50 words could have saved me from years of pain and humiliation. But no one thought to mention it. My school had given us some basic sex ed, but they never covered it. But they did cover wet dreams because obviously that’s more important.

I’ve shared my story with other women and it turns out I’m not the only one that had this issue. Dozens of women got back to me telling me that they had the same experience. One poor girl, she messaged me saying something like, “I know this sounds weird, but thank you for teaching me what discharge is.” She went on to tell me that she was 19 years old and that she had been experiencing it for ~8 years and had no idea what it was until she read my post. As soon as she noticed this white stuff in her underwear for the first time she went straight to her step mother who promptly made fun of her for being a freak. The stop mom took her to the gynecologist but they couldn’t figure out what was “wrong” with her. She had been going to the gynecologist and getting all these unnecessary and invasive exams and tests done. She thanked me for telling her what vaginal discharge was and thanked me for letting her know she’s not alone. I sent her a DM telling and infodumped everything I knew about vaginal discharge.

I couldn’t believe her story. She had been going to licences medical professionals for almost a decade and not one of them could figure out that it was just vaginal discharge.

————

When I was ~13 I put my fingers in my vagina and felt something. It felt like a tampon that had been left in there too long. I tried to pull it out but it was stuck. I then tried to scoop it out, feeling around the edges. That’s when I realized that it was attatched to me. It was not a tampon. I was terrified that it might be a tumor. But I was too scared to say anything because of the inherent shame and tabooness surrounding women’s bodies (again) and also because telling someone would mean having to admit that I put my fingers inside of myself.

About a year later I went to the gynecologist for an unrelated reason. I figured that now was the best time to bring it up. The nurse practitioner told me that I would need a pelvic exam to figure out what’s going on. I had been dreading getting a pelvic exam. I had been avoiding them for years because of a bad experience I had as a child. But I was so worried that I had literal cancer that I decided to tough it out. The nurse practitioner poked around for a while and asked if this object I mentioned was shaped like so. I said yes. She informed me that this object inside of my vagina was my cervix.

My fucking cervix! I never would’ve guessed. In the few diagrams of women’s anatomy that I had seen prior, the vagina and cervix look like two distinct organs. It always looked like the vagina ended then the cervix began. I never knew that the cervix poked out into my vagina like that.

————

I had such horrible experiences I vowed to prevent as many women as possible from experiencing the same thing. I made a point to tell my sisters everything I knew before it would be too late. I volunteered to teach sex ed at my high school. I share my stories constantly in the hopes that it’ll prevent someone, anyone, from experiencing the same thing. If I can prevent just one woman from feeling the same that I felt, all of my work will have been worth it.

Why is this the norm? Why are so many women unfamiliar with their own bodies? Why is it that what litte sex ed we get focused on men and their bodies? Why did my sex ed covered wet dreams and how to wash your dick, but never once mentioned vaginal discharge?

I used to agree that 7th grade was way too early for sex ed. I now couldn’t disagree more. Many girls at my school began menstruating before those two hours of sex ed we got in 7th grade. Children need to know what’s going to happen to their bodies during puberty before it happens, not after.

My area loves to pride itself on having some of the best sex ed in the country, but we really do have so far to go.

This is why I’m going into sex therapy/research/education/writing. I want to give free speeches at middle and high schools so the students will be prepared. I want to write books. I want to write a book directed at parents on how to talk to their kids about their bodies and sex. I want to write a book directed at children and teens about their bodies. I’m dedicating my life to prevent as many people as possible from experiencing what I did.