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#why? and why did I think it'll look good?
jiao-ming · 3 days
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Aventurine
From: Honkai Star Rail
Theme: Fluff?
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(Photo from Pinterest)
——— ☆ • ♧ • ♤ • ♧ • ☆ ———
You never really saw a reason to live, all life was is a circle of meaningless. The things you knew about life was that it was better to be feared than be loved.
Ever since you could remember, your life was filled with misfortune. Each time you meet someone, they'll either kill you on site or kill you later on. If you think it'll be different, it wasn't...I wouldn't...
You had a wonderful gift of power, if it was even called a gift. It gives you more of a curse then blessings, everytime someone founds out about them you'll be in danger. So you eliminate the danger as soon as possible, even if you thought they'll be different...
But something stranged happened one day...
You were just chilling on a rooftop of a building in the middle of the night. Then you heard the rooftop door open, you were ready to kill the person but they spoke up to you.
"The rumors say that you'd be in the tallest darkest building in the city..."
You turn your head and face the masculine voice, you saw it was a man who wore expensive clothing. The clothes he wore had designs like of different gambling games, it caught your attention by his bold style.
"What do you want from me."
You said coldy to the male, you didn't want to be here any longer. If he tries to stop you, you'll kill him.
"It's not want, more like a need."
The male says smirking at you as his eyes shine with excitement. This made you confused by his choice of words. Your guard was up, what is he up to.
"Who are you...?"
You said confused with wariness, you already had your gun ready if he tried something.
"I'm Aventurine, part of the IPC—"
You immediately cut him off by shooting him by the side of his head. His eyes widen by the sudden violence.
"IPC huh...I don't associate with any of you people..."
Your eyes glare at him as you spoke harshly towards him, you never liked the IPC. The organization is just pure evil with no good side to you, maybe the way you think about them was because of all your encounters with them. They all acted hostile and violent to you, with the fact of them having a terrible image in the galaxy.
"Come on now, I heard some of my associates were troubled some to you. But I assure you I'm not like them, I communicate other than fighting."
Even after Aventurine said that you still had your guard up, you held your gun up to him if he tries anything. Even the slightest movement will cause Aventurine his life with you, but all he did was smile to this.
"Doesn't matter, you all are the same. If you want something you'll take it by force."
After you said does words Aventurine laughs at it, this made you confused. Why was he so careless of showing his reactions, what was his plan.
"What if I tell you I'll help you find a reason to live."
This caught your attention, why does he know this! How does he know this! Your eyes glare at him harshly, you didn't like what this situation was turning to.
"What do you want in return..."
You said knowing this wouldn't come for free, everything has to come in a price. No matter how big or small it is, you learn it the hard way...
"What I need in return is for you to be part of the IPC,—"
That didn't surprise you, it would make sense on why he would want you to work for the IPC. With your power it would be handy to have someone like you. But the next part of his sentence caught you off guard and left you speechless.
"—and also be my bodyguard."
You look at him like he was a mad man, it wasn't like he was the first person to ask the question of you working for them. But for him to ask you to be his bodyguard!? Now that was new...
"Pardon—What?"
"You heard me! Be my bodyguard and I'll help you find a reason to live."
Was he stupid of something...No he couldn't be! Why would he ask you! Knowing how you're a so called wicked beast who is filled with sin! A known demon among citizens! He could just have hired you to do the dirty work! But he asked you to be his bodyguard! So why!?
"Why, have you heard of me?"
"Of course I did, why wouldn't I ask you to be my bodyguard if I didn't heard the rumors."
So he does know...Then why did he want you still!? Did he have a death wish or something!? Is he a mad man!? Was he manic!? Questions keep flooding your head, but you soon snap out of it when Aventurine spoke out.
"So? What do you say?"
He says with a smirk as he held his hand out for you to shake to agree to the proposal. You stare down at his short height and then to his hand, will it be worth it? Almost everytime someone ask you to work for them you decline them, and if they threaten you, you'd kill them. But now...
"Fine, I accept..."
You said as you walk towards him and shook his hand, this was something that might go terribly wrong. But then again maybe terribly right...Aventurine smirks at your decision, he then pulls out a pin. It's design was similar to his ascetic and a piece of paper, he then hands it to you.
"You'll be under me now, hope you can start work tomorrow."
He says walking away from you while waving, you look at your hand and stare at the paper. It had an address and a number, must be his address and number. You let out a sigh, you wonder if this was a good idea. But what can you do now? What is done is done, now you just have to wait for the out come...
——— ☆ • ♧ • ♤ • ♧ • ☆ ———
Sorry if I got some spelling wrong...
English isn'y first language ╥﹏╥
If you want part 2 ask me!
I'll be happy to write it :3
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bcth-uk · 18 days
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Many happy returns, dear @elennemigo 🩵🤍💛🤍🩵 😘
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jtl-fics · 1 year
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Fluent Freshman - Part 14
PREVIOUS
When Andrew came out of his bedroom to grab a second Allen wrench (he’s working on the frame of the dresser while Neil builds the drawers) he finds quite a few things to irritate him.
1st was the sound of his brother and his cousin arguing loudly. Andrew had been pretty clear that they needed to be quiet that morning but following Andrew’s clearly given guidelines was NEVER either of their strong suits.
2nd was the fact that there was a smell in the air that Andrew was unsure of. It wasn’t a bad smell. It didn’t smell like Nicky had left some component of the breakfast FF had bought to burn. Andrew sniffed the air again and…..lavender? It wasn’t really a smell that existed in the house of three college student boys.
3rd and most irritating was the fact that FF was not where Andrew had left him four hours ago on the couch. Again, Andrew had been pretty clear to both Nicky and Aaron that FF was to be left ALONE. FF hadn’t been able to go to sleep until Andrew had promised that nothing would happen to him while he slept.
He moves towards the kitchen table where Nicky and Aaron are eating some of the sour patch kids that FF had brought back as they argued, “He can’t be serious that Kate and I gross him out more than Andrew and Neil! I’ve seen how fast he walks away when they start getting gross.” He hears Aaron say.
“Aaron I have watched Smithy climb out a second story window because you and Katelyn started making out and he’d have to walk closer to you to go out the door.” Nicky returns. “I think you made him mad when you implied he was grossed out by Andrew and Neil. This is why I get spoon privileges and maybe, if Smithy is feeling forgiving, you can swipe your finger around the bowl.” he points at Aaron.
Andrew hangs back just out of sight.
He knows that FF does not like to be subjected to seeing PDA. A part of him feels…better at the confirmation that it really isn’t because him and Neil are both men. FF has seen them hold hands, kiss chastely, and lean on one another and been unbothered by that it was only when it started getting a little heated that  they’d realize that FF had left. FF never makes a scene about it, never scoffs in disgust or squeals in delight he just seems to see where it’s going and will leave if he doesn’t want to see it.
It’s nice.
“Well he’s probably mad at you for waking him up. Andrew said to leave him alone.” Aaron returns.
“He needs breakfast! He also has to take his ulcer meds at the same time so he had to wake up and eat something. He can go back to sleep after!” Nicky defends.
Andrew scowls. Ok. Nicky could live if that was the reason he woke FF up. Still, why the hell is FF in the kitchen and more importantly what bowl and spoon are Aaron and Nicky arguing over?
Andrew tunes his family’s argument out and heads to the kitchen to find FF putting a baking dish into their oven while incense burned on the counter (Andrew now realizes that was the thin box that had been in with the rest of the candy)
He sees the bowl and spoon that Nicky had mentioned and more importantly he can see the chocolate brownie batter on them. Andrew walks over to the bowl and picks it up. He wipes his finger along the inside and…
He closes his eyes for a moment to savor the flavor of the batter. He leans against the counter and his hand brushes against….a five hour energy bottle. Andrew knows he had thrown out the two he had found in FF’s bags before (Ulcer + exhaustion + FF = bad he didn’t need to be a math major like Neil to understand that math.)
Andrew shoves the bottle in his sweatshirt pocket as FF turns around and stares at him passively. FF’s eyebrow’s raise slightly but there’s no other reaction. Andrew considers that, perhaps, FF had wanted to lick the bowl.
He offers the spoon instead knowing it is the better prize but FF is the one who bought the ingredients and mixed together this amazing batter, so he gets first dibs.
“That wouldn’t be good for my stomach.” He declines and Andrew wonders if FF had taken his meds yet or, in his tired state, he’s forgotten to.
“When did you wake up?” Andrew asks.
“Hour ago.”
He should go back to sleep after he takes his meds but also knows that FF probably won’t go to sleep until the brownies are done.
“I’ll make the pie tomorrow.” FF says and Andrew blinks out of his thoughts.
Andrew decides to go get FF’s meds for him. He’ll make it clear to FF later that the guy doesn’t HAVE to keep making amazing desserts as a thanks for being invited to Columbia. If FF just so happens to WANT to keep making amazing desserts then Andrew isn’t going to be the person that stops him.
He shoves the spoon in his mouth and heads out to go find Smith’s bag and his meds.
Aaron and Nicky see him and both let out outraged noises as their quarry had been stolen.
Andrew ignores them and gets to the bag by the couch.
Who the fuck just has 14 bottles of five hour energy sitting in their bag??
***
When Andrew handed FF his ulcer meds he could admit to feeling grateful even if Andrew had obviously gone through his bag to grab it. He swallows it dry because Andrew is standing by the sink and he knows that until Andrew eats a brownie he is not in a position to ask for favors big or small.
(He learned his lesson from that one time with Captain Neil. If he wants to do anything related to Russian he has to be in the safety of his lofted bed under the cover of night and the cover of his…covers while he reads via flashlight. He will not be caught so flat footed again! These are all necessary precautions!)
Andrew seems to very much want for FF to be in prime condition for the hunt. Part of him wonders if he’ll be released amongst other game animals and FF had never felt more jealous of the turkey who got pardoned by the president the day before. Why does that stupid bird get all the luck? Where’s his presidential pardon?
That grateful feeling evaporates into a dust cloud as Andrew lifts a plastic bag, “Stop drinking these.” Andrew hisses, “They’re going to make your ulcer worse.” He points at FF.
“I need them.” He says.
“For what?”
“Five hours of energy at a time.”
“Pull out the brownies and go back to sleep Smith.”
“They still have 10 minutes.”
“Then I’ll pull them out in 10 minutes.”
“There’s a final step that I have to do once they’re fresh out of the oven.”
“What is it.”
“Smith Family Baking secret. I don’t make the rules.” FF gestures towards where the incense continues to burn, “Great Gran’s recipe and methods cannot be shared with non-blood relatives. My mom wasn’t even let in on the secret.”
Thank god
Andrew glowers at him.
Oh God
“It’ll be just 20 more minutes.”
Andrew’s eyes narrow at him.
“They’ll be worth it.” He pleads.
Andrew rolls his eyes.
“Go to sleep when they’re done. Take Nicky’s room.” Andrew commands.
“Take Nicky’s what?” Nicky leans into the kitchen.
“Smith is going to go back to sleep on your bed.”
“Yeah you look like shit Smithy. Don’t worry, unlike Neil and Andrew’s bed mine is all safe.”
Nicky zips out of the kitchen with Andrew hot on his heels. Nicky really is a good friend.
He performs the sacred rites necessary upon the brownies when they come out of the oven and takes a small corner piece to taste test and -
He closes his eyes and clasps his hands together in prayer.
‘Thank you Great Gran.’ He prays earnestly.
‘Remember to wash behind your ears’ he thinks he hears a whisper of grandmotherly advice in return.
That was probably normal.
He extinguishes the incense.
He cuts up the brownies, finds a decently sized plate, and sets the brownies out on the counter before he starts to work on doing the dishes. Yeah Yeah he could have been cleaning while he waited for the brownies to cook! That’s what you always do right? Clean as you go?
Well have you ever been baking brownies that might be the difference between life and death? No? Well then FF is just going to have to stop you right there because he had the oven light on and his eyes GLUED to these fudgey squares.
Who knows what the cousins’ oven would do? He doesn’t know this oven. He and this oven are taking their first whirl together and it could decide to turn on him at any time. They don’t have the brotherhood that he and the oven at his Gran’s house have built over the years! This oven could be one of those ones that maintain their temperature by turning on the broiler! He felt like he could never again recklessly trust an oven after he tried to make crescent rolls in the Viking Oven at his step father’s house and had gotten them back blackened by the broiler.
That oven had been the SINGLE thing he had been excited about during the kitchen remodel which means naturally it was the thing that had betrayed him.
He lets himself think of all the ways he hates the Viking brand as he finishes the dishes and puts everything back to where they belong.
He walks out of the kitchen with the platter of brownies and sets them down on the table where Aaron and Nicky are sat. “Oh my god they smell amazing.” Nicky says and immediately his hand is shooting towards the plate and picking up a corner piece.
FF valiantly resists the urge to slap his and Aaron’s hands away. He needs these to compel Andrew into letting him live.
“Oh wow, those do smell good.” He hears Captain Neil’s voice and when FF turns around Captain Neil and Andrew are both there. It is only in that moment that he realizes that he should have bought some vanilla ice cream to go with these.
Andrew’s love of ice cream was not unknown, probably even infamous. He was the man who, during the summer training, had been so possessive over the soft serve machine in the cafeteria that anyone who wanted any had to ask Captain Neil to get them a bowl or risk being threatened.
He starts towards the door. At this point Target probably isn’t even that bad, probably just some irate people who didn’t come with the rush and are mad they missed out, maybe some officers talking to witnesses on who threw cast the first Wii remote, and workers who will hate him marginally less (unless he gets the same check out person and they remember him (unlikely))
His progress is arrested by a hand grabbing his hoodie.
“Where are you going?”
“I forgot Ice Cream.” And he could get a five hour energy to slam on the way back home.
He then finds himself being pulled down an unfamiliar hallway.
Ah, the anticipation had been killing him more than the fear of his demise. His brownies had not contained the requisite amount of grandmotherly love to save him he had been relying on extract (Great Gran’s spirit guiding his hands) instead of organic (he does not have grandchildren or children for that matter)
Maybe ice cream would have been the deciding factor? He’ll never know.
He closes his eyes and lets himself be dragged. He’s too tired to fight.
A door opens, and he finds himself sat on a bed.
Weird.
“You are falling asleep standing up. Go back to sleep. I’ll leave you at Eden’s if you fall asleep in the booth.” Andrew threatens.
What.
FF knows about Eden’s.
He has heard about it from Nicky trying to get him to agree to go but he’s pretty sure it’d be like introducing an Amazon rainforest frog to the Sahara desert in terms of survivability for him.
“We’re going to Eden’s tonight?” He manages to ask.
Andrew raises an eyebrow at him but answers, “Yes.”
“I’m not really interested in clubs. I don’t drink out in public or dance.”
“Neither does Neil. I just drink. We can stay in the booth.”
“I don’t want to interrupt your time with Captain Neil.”
“It’s fine, neither of us hate spending time with you.”
“I don’t have clothes for a place like that.”
“Nicky grabbed some for you. You’re coming tonight. Go to sleep.”
With that Andrew pulls Nicky’s curtains close, shuts off the light, and closes the door.
FF, always very much like a bird when placed into a suddenly dark environment, starts to feel some of the  exceptional sleepiness that he’d been pushing off through sheer manic desperation to earn another day of life.
He lays down in Nicky’s bed and is tired enough that he can ignore the sheer amount of body glitter on the sheets (does Nicky excrete it like sweat??) and starts to let himself drift off to sleep.
Eden’s might be something completely out of his wheelhouse but-
A conversation with Nicky from when he’d been trying to get FF to go comes into his mind and he sits straight up in bed as Nicky’s words roll around in his head like stale hotdogs at a gas station.
“Eden’s is cool, even though there’s some sick shit in the basement.”
Eden’s is a Secondary Location with a BASEMENT.
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MASTERPOST FOR ALL PARTS OF FLUENT FRESHMAN AU
NEXT
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The requests to be added to the tag list got spread out across a few different mediums on this one so if I missed you then just ask in the replies!
As stated before if you’re up here and I spelled it right but you  didn’t  get a notification there might be something switched around in  your settings that won’t let me tag you properly?
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dwtolos · 2 months
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started watching another home makeover show and it hit me once again how much I want an AU where George and Sapnap are the hosts of a 'siblings getting their own rooms' show (they compete on which room suits their respective kid best) and Dream is one of the cameramen who ended up commenting out loud about something so he ends up being a faceless fan favorite. George does flirt with Dream a lot. Sapnap is very tired of it. They also compete about which room Dream would like the best, which is not the point of the show but in their hearts it is.
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lilydvoratrelundar · 1 month
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dc is doing a little mini relaunch after the current crossover finishes and honestly thank god because literally only two of their current ongoings interest me but there's a bunch of fun looking stuff happening in november that i might actually look at. and also it's starting series for several guys who should have had ongoings this whole time like the fucking JUSTICE LEAGUE
#i.e. black lightning JSA question batgirl. and i'll keep up with justice league now that they actually HAVE an ongoing#insane that it just wasn't happening for so long. why did they do that.#now i might actually take an interest in the mainline crossovers if there's a series that they're actually building from#then again. if it's crap i probably won't stick with it#but like marvel has three avengers books running concurrently CONSTANTLY. and yet dc hardly ever has justice league stuff going on#a team book is just. the obvious place to do all that stuff. cos i'm not reading batman i do not CARE about batman#but the new justice league has flash and black lightning and martian manhunter and other guys who i think are cool outside the Trinity guys#also i'm thinking i'll have a look at the 'absolute' universe. yes we are pointing and laughing at the batman design but it seems like an#interesting concept. and also extremely funny that they're going oh fuck marvel relaunched ultimates we have to do something like that too#but actually looking at the ACTUAL premise of the thing. it's more about making an extremely stripped back version of each character#designed to be at their lowest with no support systems in place#idk how it'll turn out. might be too edgy and angst filled for my tastes.#but it looks worth a look#for the record the two series i'm actually readign currently are poison ivy and the flash.#flash i'm actually collecting (i got in when it started and am yet to be disappointed)#lily dot tee ex tee#my pull list is getting so long. and my actual pull list of comics i'm buying is getting a bit much too#but i do not regret impulse subscribing to The Power Fantasy having just read issue 1. it's INCREDIBLE.#i've stopped getting ultimate x men tho. was good but i don't think really worth the money of getting it physically. i'll just pirate.#and tbh the current dr who run is eh. and also only a 4 issue limited series. but it's dr who comics of course i'm collecting it anyway.#immortal thor is a thousand times worth the money tho holy SHIT that book is SO GOOD and i'm SO GLAD i'm reading it physically#sorry i don't comicspost often but i had. a lot of thoughts.
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sukugo · 1 year
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tagged by @your-dark-thor (thank uuuuuuu <33333333 this is such a fun tag game :D)
rules: make a 24-hour poll with the names of your wips, let it run, then write one sentence for every vote the winner got.
tagging: @demon-glittter @cowboyhorsegirl @ouredentogether @jedibongrip @0bstinate @8-bitdyke
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Me at 10:30pm, delusional: I can definitely do the Cazador fight and then go to sleep at a normal time
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skrunksthatwunk · 7 months
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i just finished saw v and i don't have high hopes for the rest of the franchise (based on what ive heard) but im in too deep to stop now
#no i haven't enjoyed the last two no i don't expect to get much out of the next five or so movies. but i need to know.#i guess saw v mightve suffered bc i watched it basically immediately after iv#something i didnt do with any of the others#but i was told v was one of the good ones so i was looking forward to it. i dont think it was burnout yknow#but uh. i didn't like it. i think i liked iv more honestly. strahm and hoffman do absolutely nothing for me#i liked the traps. that was it though#it felt so pointless and empty. it was the first one where i genuinely wondered why they made it. why did they decide to keep going with#this. i think ii and iv both function more/better as setup for their following films but like. at least iii was pretty good yknow#like both amanda and hoffman's accomplicing feels kinda retconned in but at least amanda's an interesting character#what does hoffman have. what does strahm have. nothing. and no i don't think they have much in the way of homoeroticism either.#i don't tend to be so negative and im sorry if someone goes in the saw tags and feels bad about me talking shit about something they like#because i know that doesn't feel good. honestly i'd love to hear why people like v. maybe it'll change my opinion of it if i look at it a#different way yknow? but for now im just annoyed by it. iv was engaging in the moment but very forgettable#i liked riggs well enough but we barely learned a thing about him. he wasn't a deep character at all and i think that's a shame#but v was just a paperwork-based cat and mouse chase. 90 minutes and it still felt like they were wasting my time#why did strahm go to the old trap locations? i don't think he found anything out there. likr it was just a framing device for the flashback#but he didn't actually have a reason to go there. waste of my time#not an original critique im sure but saw ii on seems to be more focused on scale and layers of shit (i.e. having two games going at once)#than using the traps to examine the characters. i mean you go from two guys in a bathroom for a couple hours#learning about who they are gradually at a slow pace vs like 8 people in a house plus cop stuff plus 90 second traps of dubious fairness#hoffman has no real relationship with kramer (unlike amanda) and basically everyone who'd been following jigsaw is dead and so are jigsaw#and (presumably) amanda. what am i supposed to be here for? the vague outline of a saw trap? the type of torture happening?#im not even opposed to that per se but frankly the more they focus on the cops surrounding this shit the less fun it is#why are you making all the traps like 15 seconds long and tied to characters who aren't the primary focus. it's saw#ughh i miss adam. i miss amanda. hell i miss kramer and he was pretty present in this one (flashbackwise)#whateverrr. anyway that poll comparing chainshippng shotgunnshippng and coffinshippng where shotgun was last? lesbophobic.#im only half joking about that. im sure ppl have their reasons for coffin but i also think it's the tendency fandom bias for “two white guy#ships. but hey maybe vi and onwards will add more context to that that'll make me reconsider. i mean i wouldn't have liked the amanda#accomplice thing That much if i'd only seen ii. i think iii really makes it mesh better and it leads to fun character stuff#(though i still think i would've liked it more bc like. amanda was always grateful to jigsaw right? again hoffman comes outta nowhere)
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cosmojjong · 2 years
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cut my hair like this today
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violetganache42 · 2 years
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Yep. Mario movie still looking mid as fuck.
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#my post#movie trailer#mario movie#super mario bros. movie#the super mario bros. movie#why did they think it was a good idea to give that luma a mouth? it makes them look more weird than cute#and don't get me started on the overusage of fanservice to all the other mario media#if you're adding references to past media of a franchise at least space them out instead of shoving it in everyone's faces every 5 seconds#and the plot is SO predictable and uninteresting#mario and luigi are two plumbers from brooklyn who get sent to another world one day#the two get separated upon being teleported and luigi gets kidnapped by bowser#mario ends up in the mushroom kingdom teams up with peach and toad and they all go on a mission to save luigi#all while making new friends allies and foes along the way in the smb worlds they come across#soon they board on their go-karts to face bowser defeat him and mario reunites with luigi#watch the 'big twist' be they were born in the mushroom kingdom and got sent to brooklyn as babies#after reading charlie day's interview what's the point of keeping the plot of this a secret if literally everyone knows what it'll be about#ESPECIALLY if it's about mario? i swear to fucking god with spoiler culture#if your movie hinges solely on avoiding any and all spoilers from everyone especially when it's twist-driven then it's not a good movie#and that's exactly what this movie has going on: excessive broad appeal to compensate:#1. the fact that there's nothing interesting about it at all and 2. its obsession to avoid spoilers and twists from the cast and audience#sounds really on brand for nintendo illumination and the teen titans go! creators#(i mention the ttg creators because they are involved with making this movie which explains a whole lot)
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neverendingford · 6 months
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#tag talk#watched “it follows” and I shouldn't have. didn't know it was horror going in but after a few minutes I did and I should have stopped#I'm apparently still not 100% past self-terrifying as a form of self harm. I knew I shouldn't have and I kept watching anyway#you know. most people don't know what terror is. they know fear. they know worry. they know anxiety.#terror is something different. I wish I could describe it but you really only know it when you have felt it.#that freezing up of your body. I guess some people get terror in different ways though. I freeze. others fight or flight. I just freeze.#that sense of helpless anticipation as you experience the certainty that the object of your terror is approaching. inevitably.#why fight it? you fucking can't. no matter what you do it'll always get you. it's stronger. more powerful.#hmmm. csa moment oops. I am tempted to make a joke here but I don't want to deflect from my issues.#I have trauma and I wish I didn't. I have hurt that I don't even consciously remember but my body does.#I do not have emotional trauma in the way that people have survivors guilt and feeling like it was their fault. any of those surface emotion#not calling it shallow. but like. it's like when you don't look at the needle and you don't even notice the skin prick but you feel it#you feel it hit your vein and you feel that deep body response that Something Is Not Right.#like when I got my wisdom teeth pulled and I elected to not go under for it so I was numbed but conscious for it.#part way through my body started uncontrollably shaking (well. sort of controlled. I'm good at that).#I didn't feel the pain. I wasn't afraid. but my body was feeling objective physical trauma and I had the response anyway.#I don't remember really. I don't have the surface level pain responses to the trauma.#but deep down my body knows something is wrong and I can't stop my bones from shaking even though I don't feel the pain.#hmmm. I should talk to my next therapist about this.#Lear chased off our last therapist when I was having my dissociative week after watching The Hunt.#which. tbh good riddance she was not equipped to handle us in the slightest. and we're talking to our friend/gf(?) again which is really nic#she and Lear had a few solid conversations too. which was funky cause before he snapped he didn't want anything to do with her#but we kinda had a moment where he realized he's just as fucked up as I am just differently.#anyone reading these tag talks might remember so I won't go over it again.#anyway. I'm not sleeping tonight. I think I should start taking the full pill instead of just the half. but it's just suppressing symptoms#I'm acting up because of my inner state. or maybe my inner state is tumultuous because of my outer condition? idfk#either way I'm suffering over here#not a sui risk but damn#I'm gonna finish patching the pair of pants I've been not working on for the past months
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dreamingpine · 9 months
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i really like them, but i also hate them. but im not really sure if i actually hate them or if i just like. hate the me i see in them. but like. is this feeling hate? or just like...disappointment?
#well they didnt /want/ to get better. not like you mc. someone who doesnt work hard. they dont-#-deserve to be saved. they wanted this so its only right that we dont geel bad mc.#that idea from before. more thinkings#so like. im really digging the scapegoat character;but this is probably because they look i used for them was a defult i use for when “i”#have to be in a story [reader insert; dating sim; etc] but i really dont want “me” in the story#and that character has become like...their own thing that has many versions of the same person. anyway.#i really like this chacter because its like. they're so chill. but so so resigned to it all. its not that they dont care#they just. dont have a reason to anymore. if they even did at all. “its just like that sometimes.”#they just go with it. because. way to much effort to fight against it. fight that good fight. and then i think about mc#who they are supposed to be a shadow of.#mc fights that good fight. they're life is screwed but they're /working/ on it. they want to get better#they want to live better. they want to be alive. they want to help but sometimes its to much. you know#typical mc fashion.#mc is like. okay.#im putting to much of myself in these characters but maybe thats why im so into this right now.#mc is like the person i want to be. whos going through it all but they want to get better. they have the blood on their knuckles#and determination and fear and /hope/. they keep saying it'll get better and they'll make it that way on god#and i want that for me but its so...so so hard you know?#and then theres shadow. or doppel. whatever#they're resigned and its just to hard to fight its so much easier to do the bare minimum even if thats getting harder#and harder by the day. but they do it. they dont have anything else going on. no dreams; no goals; no future. they're just here#so when asked to be mc's shadow its just a “whatever” thing#any frustration they might have felt gone with years of being worn down#they dont /want/ to get better. dont want to put in the work and. i like that.#there's no one thats gonna hold their hand on the path to getting better and they know that. thats also why its so easy to just live this#way since its like. normal now.#and that brings me to mc's dilemma. mc doesnt want to do thsi role that will kill them. they want to get better.#so when someone takes that role; willingly even; does that make mc “bad” for feeling relief?#but like. how would they know if this was something they wanted?#..personally. as the person writing this and the person who realtes to these 2 mc's. i wonder
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gloryinthunder · 10 months
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I used to really love the first romance scene with Astarion (and I still do) but it hits so much harder after you know why he's doing it. That he's purposefully seducing you for protection and blood, that he's forcing himself to sleep with you, and this is a mask he's wearing.
It's a sexy scene and really feeds into the vampy (pun intended) jump-your-bones version of him you get at the start of the game. The whole thing starts out with him being so confident and suave, saying that he's wanted you ever since he set eyes on you and how you want to be known and tasted. It's like everyone's perfect vampire romance novel.
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He's laying out the bait that's worked thousands of times over and luring you in. And you can just get right to the kissing if you want.
But, you can also stop and ask him, "And what do you want?"
And for just a moment the mask drops. This is not the same cocky seductive face we've had up until now. This is vulnerability showing. When has anyone asked him what he wants? When has anyone cared? Does he even know the answer to that question?
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So he pivots. The mask snaps back into place immediately. He turns back into the master seducer and feeds you a line about shared ecstasy to get you back on track.
And then comes what is, to me, the pivotal moment. He asks you "That's what you want, isn't it? To lose yourself in me?"
Looking at his body language he seems unsure at first, maybe questioning his previous tactics. Then he slightly cowers back, lowering himself as he asks the question. The total opposite of his confidence from earlier where he's standing with his arms out wide.
He's not sure what you want anymore. You're not playing by the rules he knows. Why haven't you taken the bait yet? Why haven't you thrown yourself at him?
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And when you finally Nod in agreement, confirming you're here for sex?
This. This is the face he gives you. He just looks so damn sad. To me, it hearkens back to "Of course it'll turn me into a monster. What else did I expect?"
Whatever momentary blip made him question why you're there with him, he's just been reassured about both of your roles in this situation.
He sounds so quietly resigned when he answers: "I thought so."
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And then the scene transitions into the actual act. I do like to think Astarion enjoyed himself as I'm sure the PC did, but it's hard for me to watch this scene now that I know his story and history without being uncomfortable.
Just that line "lose yourself in me" is so difficult to hear. Because on paper it's so sensual. Who wouldn't want a lover to feel that way about them? But knowing the context of what Astarion expects and believes in this moment is just... oof.
And to me, this is what makes this scene brilliant. The writing, voice acting, and the mocap/animation are all just SO GOOD. It's so delicately done and Astarion the character is so good at playing a role that you can completely gloss over the deeper stuff. But once the mask is eventually stripped away you can't help but see what was there the whole time.
And as we've established, being seen is a whole aspect of Astarion's romance arc.
I originally romanced Astarion for the same reasons I'm sure most did: he's a hot, sexy vampire elf (i.e. everything that's on the surface). But, I keep coming back to him over and over again for the person I know is waiting for me underneath the mask.
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landojpg04 · 6 months
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MDNI slight suggestive and language
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Ghost definitely has a motorcycle and a truck. He'll drive the truck when he knows it'll be a long day doing intel and paperwork. But especially on a Friday when the workload is light, he’ll come in on his bike knowing he’ll be able to enjoy the ride.
He started riding the bike more when you gave the comment-
Guys who ride motorcycles are ten times more attractive with their bike
You didn’t say it to him per se but rather to a friend of yours on base, and he overheard. He likes to think that the bike is his good luck charm, as you agreed to a first date when he drove it. But despite you loving the bike as much as you loved him, he never let you on it. Always exclaiming it would be too dangerous.
He's in the garage, music playing lightly from the speaker as he cleans and messes with some of the gears. You watch in awe at the door. Never in a million years did you think you would be here. In Lt’s old t-shirt, sipping tea and watching him indulge in normalcy on a Sunday afternoon. When you transferred to the base, you always heard rumors about the man behind the mask and the name Ghost. But behind that was this man full of love.
“Enjoying the show, darling?” He said, looking up from the bike to see you.
“Just admiring.” You said.
“The bike or the rider?” He said smirking.
You admired and mirrored that smirk. Something you thought you would never see in your lifetime. But after trials of trust, the mask and guards came down, bearing all the luggage, and past to your welcoming arms. 
“Both,” you said, walking over to him. He was seated on a chair and leaned back to welcome you in between his legs. 
He peered up, his eyes glimmering in the sunlight that peaked through the window.
“Let me ride.” You said, peering down.
“You can ride me anytime.” He said, being cheeky.
You groaned at his antics and pouted towards him.
“Do you not trust me on your precious baby, Si?”
He looked between you and the bike. It wasn’t that he didn't trust you. He knows how dangerous riding is. He doesn’t want to let you on just in case something happens. He’s come to terms with something happening to him a long time ago. But you. He just got you and would put you in a bubble if it meant keeping you safe. 
“I trust you. I just don't trust others.” He says, moving a piece of hair from your face. He moves his hand to cup your jaw. He guided you to his lips for a quick peck.
You leave your forehead on him while he moves his hands down to your hips.
He can tell you were annoyed with your answers. You guys bonded over this bike and he truly believes that being able to ride it one day was the only thing keeping you around.
That was far from the truth. You just wanted to straddle something other than Simons's dick.
He stood up and moved you to the side.
He pushed the brake down and moved to the back of the bike.
"We can start with basics. Posture and positions." He said looking at you.
Stunned by his answer and quick change in answers, you didn't move till he said, "Ok, I guess you don't want to." You feet quickly moved to stand by him.
He went through the basics, teaching you how to mount and where to keep your feet. After, it was your turn to demonstrate your understanding. You go to the side and lift a leg to straddle the seat.
Simon from the back saw how you were a natural at this. Your ass is plump on the seat you lean to hold the handles with a slight arch in your back. Simon thought to himself why he hadn't let you do this earlier. He was so caught up in how good you look he didn't even hear you ask him if what you were doing was good.
You looked over to see him in a daze. He quickly grabbed his phone and took a photo of you on his bike, clad in his boxers and old t-shirt; every inch of you screamed that you were his. And he never loved anything more than this moment right now.
He walked to the front of the bike.
"Is this alright Si?" You asked him when you finally are met with his face.
He just smiled and leaned in to kiss you.
"My gorgeous girl on my bike," He said in between kisses.
You giggled and removed your hands from the handles to his neck and shoulder.
"Get off the bike and get inside right now." He said, pulling away. Laughing, you got off and felt a slight smack hit your ass. This was definitely not your last time on his bike.
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rosedpetal · 16 days
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Behave
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Summary: Bucky shows you what happens when you test him.
Pairing: Bucky Barnes x Wife!Reader
Word count: 1.2k
Warnings: smut.
Minors, do not interact.
Masterlist
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You didn't mean to be so overbearing, but you just loved him so much.
"Doll, you have to stop giving the stinky eye to these women. It's getting embarrassing." He whispered on your ear, his grip tightening just a little bit on your arm as he smiled for the people schmoozing at Tony's gala event. "Seriously, when did you get so jealous?"
"Jealous?" You scoff, adjusting the skirt of your long dress, softening the slightly wrinkled fabric. "Barely. I just wish you didn't look so smug with all those single bitches fawning over you."
"In my time, we used to call them spinsters." Bucky raised his eyebrow at you.
"Well, that's just sexist."
"And calling them bitches is not?"
Your glare made him shut his mouth, a little smirk threatening to tug at the corner of his lips.
"I get it, okay? I'm being too much. It's just that I'm so obsessed with you. Why can't I just be one of those wives who barely wait for their husbands to drop dead?" You sighed, adjusting his tie.
He chuckles, a low rumble reverberating through his chest. He trapped your chin between his thumb and index finger, amused at you. "You're crazy, you know that? But it's okay. Your psycho side is almost as cute as your clingy and needy one."
You roll your eyes. "Gotta admit, though. You looked really hot over there talking to them and signing autographs and all. If I didn't want to stab your guts off, I'd be horny... " You paused. "Okay. I'm horny either way."
"Behave." Bucky hissed, looking around to see if anyone was paying attention to the two of you. At the sound of your little crazed giggle, he snapped his head back to you. "How much have you had to drink, by the way?"
"I didn't drink that much. I don't know what's taken over me, okay? You're just... Ugh!" You groaned, and Bucky blinked, a little taken aback. "You're hot. Are you taken?" You playfully bat your eyelashes at him and he chuckles.
"Well, I do have a wife. But she's quite small, so I think you can take me from her if you want to." He smirked, rubbing circles on the small of your back.
"Ugh, you're married? I bet she's a fucking witch."
Bucky shakes his head, getting his lips close to your ear. "Honestly... My wife is quite crazy. Sometimes I'm scared at how unhinged she can be when she's jealous."
"Is she hot, though?"
"Oh... She's so hot. Just thinking of her has me feeling all types of way... But she's also quite needy. It gets on my fucking nerves. I swear, that woman could drop on her knees to beg for my attention."
"Is begging the only good thing she can do on her knees, though?" You purr.
Bucky checks again for any nosy listeners, relaxing a bit as he realizes you're too are safe.
"Well... She also prays really well, just like a good girl should."
Your could feel your gaze becoming a little unfocused, your core warming up. "I wanna choke you so bad."
Bucky's face and neck turn a little red. "Jesus, baby. What has gotten into you tonight? Is it all because I dressed up?"
"Maybe. Do you think it's possible for humans do go into heat?"
"Oh. I don't know, are you?"
"Breed me. Breed me. Breed me." You chanted on his ear, and his grip on your hips tightened almost painfully.
"Stop right this second." He hisses. "I do not need this right now. Are you trying to get me hard in public, you little shit?"
"Is it working?"
"You're going to pay for this."
"Are you gonna give me your belt tonight?"
"Y/N-"
"What? Is this too kinky for you? Is the idea of marking my ass with your leather belt too much for your poor brain to handle right now, baby?"
Bucky closes his eyes, fists clenching on his sides. Then, he grabs you by your waist, pulling you to the nearest room he could find.
He swiftly unlocks the door, assessing the small supply closet you two are in. It's not ideal, but it'll be enough. His hand fly to your throat, pressing on it slightly, eyes darkened with desire, his slacks tight and uncomfortable. "Filthy little tease. You enjoy riling me up, don't you? Do you think you'll get away with this little stunt you just pulled, huh?"
His vibranium hand snakes under your dress through the slit on your thigh, his eyes darkening at how soaked your underwear is. "Tsk. Does being a little slut make you wet, baby?"
You whimper, completely overtaken by lust, his digits teasing your clothed clit. "You can try to give me shit for misbehaving, but you love how obsessed I am with you, isn't that right? You crave my attention. You thrive on how needy I can get for you."
Bucky's eyes darken, the beautiful expansion of his blue irises only getting noticed by you by the moonlight reflecting through the small window.
"You're giving me fucking butterflies, Bucky. What the fuck? Wasn't that supposed to stop after we got married?" Your brows furrow, your indignant tone making a little snicker escape him. He hooks his finger on the waistband of your panties, a sharp tug being enough to rip your underwear.
"I didn't vow to bore you 'til death do us part, doll. I'll never stop making you feel this way." He whispered, gaze softening at you. Time seemed to stop as he inched closer to you, lips brushing against your red painted ones. "I fucking love you, you unhinged little thing."
"Love you too, baby." Your eyes close shut, mouth hanging open as he fingers you in the supply closet, swallowing your moans with his tongue, bucking his hips on your hand as you palm him through the straining fabric.
Reaching down, you swiftly undo his slacks, pulling them low enough just to free his twitching cock, guiding the thick head to your entrance.
With how lubricated you are, he only has to spit on his cock and moisten the length with his hand, a low growl leaving his mouth as he sink on your heat, inch by inch.
There's a moment of silence as you two lock eyes, your weeping pussy welcoming him with a tight grip that he swears it makes him harden, if that's even possible.
Your head falls back with the first shallow thrusts, a small gasp leaving your lips. Bucky's gritting his teeth, pulling you up, your legs wrapping around his middle. Then, he slams into you.
You can't even speak, getting your walls bullied repeatedly by your husband's thick cock. "F-fuck! Bucky, ohmygod, wait!"
He smirks, not slowing down a second. "I told you were gonna pay for being a menace tonight. What's the problem, baby? What happened to the slut who told me to breed her just a few minutes ago? Where is she? Huh?" He circles his hips, buried deep inside you, making you see white. He swats your thigh, his voice rough. "Answer me."
A little, humiliating whine escapes you, and he chuckles again.
"See, baby? How I can fuck the brat out of you? How you should think before riling me up? How you can't back up for your little antics?" His vibranium thumb circles your clit, the coolness of it only serving to make you orgasm quicker.
Bucky moans at your walls clamping violently on him, a grip so deliciously tight it makes him wanna pull his own hair. So he tugs hard at your locks instead, exposing your neck for his greedy lips as he comes inside you.
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mellowwillowy · 8 months
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𝐓𝐖𝐒𝐓 𝐒𝐞𝐥𝐟-𝐀𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐂𝐨𝐦𝐩𝐢𝐥𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧𝐬
Feat: Riddle, Leona, Azul, Kalim, Vil, Idia, Lilia Bonus: Floyd, Jade, Jamil, Rook, Epel, Malleus
Riddle Rosehearts
Riddle’s face was almost as red as his hair, not out of anger but rather…
[Oh my gooodddd, stomp those tiny feet again, Riddle! Give me that pout~]
Really… should he do it again? Out of nowhere? Well, let’s take a walk to where you clicked then…
[Yaahhh!! So cuteeee!!!]
Well at least you didn’t think him badly for being angry out of nowhere… whoops, he wasn’t supposed to idle like that.
Ahh, why are you moving on to another character? Cater? That good for nothing? The naughty ADeuce duo? He's almost turning from red to green in envy!
Leona Kingscholar
Leona was supposed to be ticked to the brim but definitely not with you. His ears are red from your nonstop rambling while you keep on poking his avatar right on his ear.
[I wonder how it feels like to play with his ears, ah, maybe I should help you clean it too?]
Don’t. Twitch. Ears. Else the player might notice this and question this one new idle.
[Thinking back, I kinda wanna try stepping on his tail like Yuu too~]
Don’t. Swish. Tail. What? Is he a masochist or what? Well, if it’s for you then he wouldn’t mind it.
Wait wait, why are you checking out Ruggie and Jack now? Hey, what do you mean Ruggie has cuter ears and Jack has a fluffier tail? Why do they look so proud? Are they asking to be minced?
Azul Ashengrotto
Azul might break out of the avatar restraint now. You’ve been talking about how you want to squeeze the kid him, round and plump, you quoted.
Why did you find his past appearance adorable?
[Honestly, I kinda want to lift him and his hiding spot and boil him as a takoyaki filling]
Now that made Floyd and Jade snickered. Azul was internally panicking but his avatar did not show him breaking a single sweat.
[Or maybe gather all his ink whenever he cries]
For your pen?
[But I do think squeezing his plump octomer form is the best~ Oh well, he had lost all those baby fats]
And back to how you ramble about his round self again. This was supposed to be disheartening but why was he blushing?
Wait wait, don't look away from him, no! Why are you going to Floyd? And Jade too? He knew Floyd won your heart but allow him to worm into your heart at the very least. Please let one of his three hearts rest in you!
Kalim Al-Asim
Kalim was nodding non-stop at your ramblings, or should he say, wishes. He was really happy that you were taking him as your magic lamp!
[And then, I want you to lace my body with lots of glitters, made of gold!]
No hard task, he just had to grind all that gold into some sort of fairy dust for you!
[Oh! And I want to try swimming in a pool of golden coins like Uncle Scrooge! I wonder if it'll hurt and uncomfortable as I think...]
He was in the same boat with you. You'd have to be careful when diving into the pool! But you can try sleeping on it though you should be careful, just in case the coins swallow you whole!
[And a carpet ride every night~]
Roger that! Tell him more of your wish, will you?
Eh? Why do you stop wishing? No! He will guarantee you that he will make it all come true! Please do not doubt him! Ah... it's because you two are in a different dimension? Screw this barrier that separates you two then.
Vil Schoenheit
Yes, he knew he was unworthy of your praises but he couldn't help but enjoy bathing in it!
[Look at your hair... and that make-up! Wow... truly is the fairest one of all!]
Oh please, no matter how much you compliment him, he could never compete with you beauty-wise! You would always be the true fairest one of all!
[Aha! Look at those heels too, contribute a lot to your height, and make you look so pretty!]
Even a prominent actor like him can't cover his natural reaction which was the growing blush on his face!
Eh? Rook? What does he have to do with him? Too in love with his words more than the beauty in front of you right now? No no no, you must look at him only and no one else!
Idia Shroud
If anything, he was glad his hair did not turn pink! From the way you kept on poking his avatar and patting his head, it made his heart tickled. He was no longer stuttering because the system wanted him to, but because he himself was nervous!
[Oh, show me that one illustration... Kyaaa! Why must you be so cute biting on your sleeve??? It's so inviting!!!]
Ah? That one? He couldn't help but feel embarrassed as you zoomed into his face and examined his hair. Truly, this was too much for his heart!
[Oh oh, and your masquerade costume is so pretty! It makes you look so pretty ffs!]
Ah, it was pretty uncomfortable to wear but he's glad he didn't take it off, not like he can do that anyway. The system won't allow that after all.
Everything feels nice so why are you changing character now? Wait wait! Have you checked his other card? No no no, why is that little shortie fae here? Don't close on him, please! He might want to try hacking your phone soon!
Lilia Vanrouge
Oya? You'd like to dress him up? Kukuku, looks like green and pink would work well on him~
[And... I think we can try curling his long hair, can we change the hue from red to pink like a color wheel?]
...Curling his hair didn't sound bad. Maybe he should try it sometimes and see if it suited him.
[Oh! And I'm gonna hang him upside down like the bat he is! My cute little bat, let's fist-fight!]
You really are an enigma huh? One moment is a sweet and docile lamb then the next moment you are a bull. Hm? Malleus? Why talk about him so sudden? Didn't you say he is your number-one favorite from Diasomnia? So why are you looking at someone else now?
𝐁𝐎𝐍𝐔𝐒:
Floyd Leech
God of Shrimpy~ Keep on poking him, he loves it! Ah, you love his teeth? And his droopy eyes? And his laugh? Hehe, you really love everything about him huh?
So why do you even bother looking at the others? He's going to hug you tight for this silly!
Jade Leech
Ah, he is quite the gentleman, no? Hm? You'd like to keep him as your butler? Why that is quite the generous idea that you allow him to manage your daily life~
With a small dose of love potion in your daily tea every day, he's bound to have you in his arms soon, well, if he ever finds a way to pull you into this twisted wonderland.
Jamil Viper
It truly is an honor to be considered as someone reliable (from babysitting Kalim) and acknowledged as an attendant who could shield you from any danger, truly. He is ready to put his life in line for you so why?
Why are you saying that there's someone else who might fit the position as your attendant more than him? And that person being that slimy eel no less!
Rook Hunt
Ah! This is amazing! To be able to charm you with his words and let him worm into your heart is truly a blessing! Would you like him to write you a poem detailing your beauty?
No no, mon chèri, you shouldn't grace those who are unbefitting of it, don't you think it's a waste to spare the other your grace? Allow this hunter to save you from that trouble.
Epel Felmier
H-huh? You want to dress him up? Naturally, he hates being treated as a doll, a girl no less! But... the idea of you helping him dress and helping him with makeup... he can do this. It is your way of gracing him after all...
Huh? You want to dress Lilia up too? Why? Because he's cuter? Oh no, there's no way there's someone who is prettier than him, look at him, look at how pretty he is in this dress!
Malleus Draconia
If anything, he will always hear you compare him and Riddle to the 'Queen of Heart' and 'Maleficient' from your world. You will praise him for being able to stand on the same level as the actress' beauty which makes him feel giddy.
But boy is he sulking when you start rambling about Riddle and the big-headed Queen. You will dote on him and Riddle back and forth.
Can't you just dote on him?
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