#why would the erins make them related???
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Before you look at me as if I’m insane based on the fact Spottedleaf, Redtail and Tigerclaw are all related this is canon. Leopardfoot, Spottedleaf and Redtail are all siblings. Don’t believe me?
You see this? They are all related. Willowpelt and Patchpelt have just been yeeted from this family tree in my rewrite
#Warriors#erin hunter warriors#Warrior Cats#family tree#warrior cats family tree#crazy's warrior cats rewrite#crazywarriorcatsrewrite#crazy warrior cats rewrite#crazy’s warrior cats rewrite#wcantinomy#warriorcatsrewriteantionomy#tigerclaw's uncle and aunt are canonly redtail and spottedleaf respectively#this just boggles my mind so much#why???#why would the erins make them related???#actually why would you make all of these cats related
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happy yaoriween or something . oh plus something wdk if we'll finish
#art#my art#comic aurora#aurora comic#aurora webcomic#what the hell is the agreed upon tag#erin is intentionally more desaturated but wdk how well that shows since he always looks sickly#alinua aurora#tess ruunaser#erin ruunaser#tessulina#this is our first time drawing ship art + first time we drew tess and paladin sorry it looks weird#we know paladin and erin is called “micherin” but that sounds stupid so we're making up a name#it would have to be changed anyway when the paladin's name is known. hmm ..#half moon#do people use [ship name]shipping we're from the monkie kid fandom and wdk if their tag usage is universal#our worst trait is having two dreams that were half moon-related and that's why we ship them. no idea if we should ever describe them
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i always forget this character exists but apparently he appears frequently so clearly the erins havent so i gotta ask. if they HAD to give ivypool or blossomfall hetero marriages why didnt they go for stormcloud
#if u dont know who that guy is (and i would not blame you) hes a kittypet that joined TC during bramblestar's storm#like. from what im gathering hes close in age to them#and if you HAVE to give ivy a bland nobody tom who vaguely mentions being soft which makes him a feminist#why not choose the guy whos a former kittypet#and also i say this less bc i care abt him and more bc. hey. hey no incest. no incest. or pedophilia.#hey erins theres a chance for u to not have an extremely creepy pairing here. why dont u take it. hey erins.#like he has no children in the clans at all so far and its so weird bc like they keep pairing up cats who are related#to the point where every character besides storm may as well be related#so like why introduce him and make a big deal out of including him if you arent going to do anything with him#or at least make these cats somewhat less inbred#echoed voice
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A Writing Challenge from August 1st - September 21st
"Erin, what is Frith?"
Frith, is an Old Norse term, typically used among friends and kinsmen, that would often be used in a diplomatic way to bring peace.
Or, more plainly, “a mutual agreement to avoid causing each other physical, emotional, or mental harm, and to avoid negatively affecting each other’s honor, worth, and luck.”
This is meant to be a long-lasting agreement among those that take part.
Now, I’ve spent a decent amount of time to know, in this fandom, that that could very well be wishful thinking, but I’m choosing to stay positive here. It’s no secret that there have been things happening lately that are less than stellar, to put it mildly.
But I’m not here to talk about that.
I’m here to have fun and be creative so that’s what we’re going to do!
I’ve had this idea brewing for several months, and it’s a subject matter that’s very near and dear to my heart. In my personal life, I’m a practicing Norse Pagan. For those that are unfamiliar, I like to describe it as worshiping the Old Ones. I follow the teachings of the Norse Gods.
Why am I telling you this? Well, since this is something that’s so close to me, and we’re all here as fans of one Pedro Pascal and his work, I figured why not combine the two? Initially, the goal was to write all these fics myself, but when I discovered just how exhausting and time-consuming that would be, I decided to include all of you!
I failed to do a follower milestone to thank you all and celebrate, so take this as my thank you for sticking around here and showing support to my fics and gifs.
Alright, so how is this going to work?
huge shoutout to @scenaaario and @kedsandtubesocks for all your help on this you lovely humans ♥
Another important aspect of Heathenry (Norse Paganism) is reciprocity. “Gifts given for gifts received.” So, you all wouldn’t just be giving me a bunch of fics to read. I’ve made something for those of you who will participate as well. This is an equal exchange.
I’ve paired up several of the PPCU with Norse Gods and made moodboards for each of them. I have reasons for matching them up the way I have, and I’ll go into more detail as to why later.
So, yes, this is a writing challenge at its core, but it’s also a way for me to show a little peace of myself with you all and for us all to be creative and have fun! Maybe you’ll step out of your comfort zone a little and that’s okay!
There is an expectation that something will be written/received, so if you don’t think you’ll be able to participate, that’s totally okay. There’s no pressure at all, and I appreciate any support or boosting to get to those that would like to!
Okay, enough of all that, which Gods have I chosen to match up with the Boys?
I’m glad you asked! Matching up traits and personalities was really fun, and really challenging. Nothing is a 1:1 match, but that’s okay. Nothing is supposed to be, and that’s where some of the challenge may come in.
For those that are participating in the challenge, you’ll send me an ask declaring which God/Pedro Boy you’d like to write. In return, and my part of the reciprocity, you’ll receive a moodboard to use for your fic, and a little blurb telling you a little more about the God and why I’ve chosen that character to pair them with. I’m hoping some of them will be a little obvious, but I’m aware not everyone is as familiar with the Gods as I am.
There are only 14 slots and therefore only 14 moodboards made, so once someone has been claimed, that’s it. As much as I’d love to have even more people participate, I don’t think I can make that many things lol.
If you’d still like to contribute somehow, I’m open to any questions you may have about the Gods (and maybe how the boys relate), because I��m a big ol’ nerd and love talking about this shit.
So, who’s who?
Maxwell Lord – Odin [Óðinn] (The All-Father and God of wisdom, magic, war, death, but also cunning and trickery.) claimed by @missredherring
Pero Tovar – Thor [Þórr] (God of thunder, lightning, sacred groves and trees, strength, and the protection of humankind.) claimed by @morallyinept
Max Phillips – Loki (The Trickster God of mischief and chaos.) claimed by @qveerthe0ry
Oberyn Martell – Freyja (Goddess of love, sensuality, sex, passion, war, and magic.) claimed by @guiltyasdave
Javier Peña – Freyr (God of fertility, harvests, and peace.) claimed by @almostfoxglove
Ezra – Týr (God of victory, law, and justice.) claimed by @marisferasiop
Marcus Moreno – Frigg (Goddess of domestic life, marriage, and maternal energy.) claimed by @joelalorian
Joel Miller – Hel (Goddess of death and guide to the underworld.) claimed by @beefrobeefcal
Dieter Bravo – Bragi (God of poetry, oral traditions, and the Skaldic Poet of the Aesir.) claimed by @schnarfer
Javi Gutierrez – Baldr (God of light and purity.) claimed by @morallyinept
Dave York – Vidar [Víðarr] (The Silent God of vengeance.) claimed by @kedsandtubesocks
Din Djarin – Heimdall [Heimdallr] (Gatekeeper of Asgard, the gods’ stronghold within Valhalla. God of guardianship, vigilance, and protection.) claimed by @djarinmuse
Frankie Morales – Skadi [Skaði] (Goddess of winter, skiing, bow-hunting, and mountains.) claimed by @agentmarcuspike
Jack “Agent Whiskey” Daniels – Ægir (Brewmaster of the sea.) claimed by @lotusbxtch
extras:
Marcus Pike – Idun [Iðunn] (Goddess of eternal youth and sacred apples.) claimed by @gasolinerainbowpuddles
Silva – Ymir (First being in existence and the reason for the creation of Earth.) claimed by @yopossum
Santiago Garcia – Fenrir (Most famous of all the wolves in Norse Mythology and the bringer of Ragnarok.) claimed by @for-a-longlongtime
There are no rules for your fic itself. You can write whatever and however much you want. All I ask is that some aspects of the Gods stay intact, otherwise this would just be any old writing challenge.
I wanna see you guys get creative with what the Gods offer. How are they speaking to you? What energy/vibes are you getting off of them? Run with it.
Now, I’m posting this the day before Lammas, the Pagan holiday that often takes place in the Summer, August 1st. I think it would round out the summer nicely if everything gets published around Mabon, September 21st, the holiday that celebrates the Fall equinox.
That gives everyone almost two months to write their stories. I’m hoping that’s a decent time? If it’s not, I’m not picky and typically run on Pagan Standard Time, so if it’ll take you a little longer, just let me know and it’ll probably be fine.
Thank you for sticking with my ramble, and I wish you all gọ̄der hēle (good luck)!
And remember, have fun!
#pedro pascal characters#pedro pascal character fanfiction#pedro pascal character fics#ppcu fanfiction#pedro pascal cinematic universe#ppcu fics#oaks
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Falling Into Place
Part 1 / Part 2 / Part 3 / Part 4 / Part 5 / Part 6 / Part 7 / Part 8 / Part 9 / Part 10
Word count: 935
Pairning: Aaron Hotchner x Agent!reader
Summary: Aaron Hotchner reflects on the turmoil of emotions following his confrontation with Y/n, grappling with regret and frustration as he processes his reaction to her connection with Strauss
______________________________________________________________
Aaron’s POV
As Aaron walked away from Rossi’s house, his heart raced with a mix of frustration and regret. He gripped the steering wheel of his SUV, knuckles white as he navigated through the darkened streets. The events of the evening replayed in his mind, and each time, he felt the weight of his words pressing down on him, suffocating.
He couldn’t believe how he had reacted. Y/n had done nothing wrong. She had opened her life to him, shared her struggles and dreams, and all he could do was lash out. But the moment he saw Erin, it was as if the ground had shifted beneath his feet. The fact that Y/n was related to her—the woman he had a complicated history with—threw him into a tailspin. It brought back memories he’d rather forget and a sense of betrayal he hadn’t anticipated.
His thoughts shifted to Jack, who was still sniffling in the back seat. The sight of his son crying had cut deeper than any harsh word he had spoken. Jack didn’t understand why things had turned so sour so quickly, and that made it all the more painful. “Daddy, why did you yell at Y/n?” Jack had asked, his small voice full of confusion.
Aaron had wanted to reassure him, to tell him it wasn’t Y/n’s fault, that he was just trying to protect them both from the complications of their feelings. But the truth was, he didn’t fully understand his own emotions. He felt cornered by his fears, and that fear had manifested in anger.
As he pulled into the driveway of their home, he shut off the engine but remained seated, staring out at the darkened house. He could see the lights were still on inside, probably from a late-night movie or a game Jack had been watching. But instead of warmth, it felt like a reminder of everything he was about to ruin.
Aaron took a deep breath and stepped out of the car, forcing himself to shake off the tension. As he walked to the door, he tried to remind himself of the times Y/n had been there for him and Jack. The way she had taken the time to bond with his son, making him feel special and loved. That had meant more to him than he could express.
When he entered the house, he found Jack curled up on the couch, a blanket draped over him as he stared at the TV, his eyes glossy. “Hey, buddy,” Aaron said softly, moving to sit beside him. “You okay?”
Jack nodded, but the slight tremble of his lip told Aaron otherwise. “I want to see Ava,” he said, his voice barely above a whisper.
Aaron’s heart sank. “I know, kiddo. I just… I got upset, and I shouldn’t have. I’m sorry.”
“Why did you get mad at Y/n?” Jack asked, turning to look at him, eyes wide with innocence.
The question hit him like a punch. How could he explain that Y/n’s connection to Erin, someone he had tried to distance himself from, felt like a threat? “Sometimes adults get confused, Jack,” he replied, trying to keep his voice steady. “I should have handled it better. I love Y/n, and I care about her.”
“But she was nice to me,” Jack said, a frown creasing his forehead. “She’s my friend.”
“She is,” Aaron agreed, guilt washing over him. “And I shouldn’t have said those things. It was wrong.”
Jack shifted closer, resting his head against Aaron’s shoulder. “I just wanted to play with Ava.”
“We can see them again soon,” Aaron promised, though he wasn’t sure how that would happen after the way he’d acted. “I’ll make it right.”
He spent the next few minutes in silence, letting the quiet settle around them. But in his heart, he knew the silence was only a temporary balm for the chaos he had created. He had hurt Y/n, and that gnawed at him like an open wound.
The thought of her tear-streaked face as she had held Ava made him clench his jaw. She deserved so much better than the way he had treated her. The walls he had built around himself were supposed to protect him, but they were also keeping out the very person he cared about the most.
Finally, he stood up, feeling restless. “You want some ice cream?” he asked Jack, trying to lighten the mood.
Jack nodded eagerly, his spirits lifting. As they made their way to the kitchen, Aaron resolved to make things right. He would talk to Y/n, apologize, and explain himself. He didn’t want to lose her—not to fear, not to misunderstandings, and certainly not to his own stubbornness.
While scooping out ice cream, he thought about what he’d say. He needed to tell her how much she meant to him, how he admired her strength and compassion. He would explain that his reaction had nothing to do with her, but everything to do with his own insecurities.
As he served up the bowls, he felt a flicker of hope. He could fix this. He could reach out to her and let her know that he wanted her in his life, no matter how complicated it got.
After all, love was about vulnerability, about accepting each other’s pasts and flaws. He just had to be brave enough to face it.
“Daddy, can we go back to Rossi’s soon?” Jack asked, interrupting his thoughts.
“Yeah, we will,” Aaron replied, smiling down at his son. “Soon.”
And with that promise in his heart, he knew he had to reach out to Y/n—before it was too late.
#fanfiction#reader insert#fanfic#aaron hotchner x reader#spencer reid#david rossi#criminal minds#aaron hotch hotchner#ssa aaron hotchner#aaron hotchner#aaron hotch imagine#aaron hotch x reader#aaron hotch fanfiction#jenifer jareau#emily prentiss#derek morgan#jack hotchner#bau team
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Naughty or Nice - Chapter 3
Summary: Tensions grow higher at the Greene farm when Negan learns the woman he had an affair with is the younger sister to the woman that he is dating.
Characters: Negan, the reader (OC), Maggie, Greene Family, etc.
AO3 Link: https://archiveofourown.org/works/51464518/chapters/130700899
Warnings: 18+, Swearing, angst, smut, etc.
Notes: I was trying to have some fun with this one. Thank you to those that read this! I appreciate all of you!
“I don’t understand,” Negan stammered to find the right words, his eyes shifting between both Y/N and Maggie. There were so many unanswered questions that were swirling around in his head. “How did you not know that your sister was my boss? And the two of you have different last names…”
“I use my mother’s last name,” Y/N informed Negan which ultimately made sense after all she told Negan when they were together last night. Huffing out, Hershel made his presence known and didn’t have to say a word to make it clear he hated that. With each passing second, all of the questions Negan had started to answer themselves. After spending such a small amount of time with Maggie’s family, by putting it together with the information he learned last night he was able to make sense of a lot of things. Maggie was the older sister that was the favorite. Y/N was the middle sister that was looked down upon and not well liked. Negan saw it in Hershel’s actions. Y/N was right about everything she told him about her family.
“You’re still using her last name?” Hershel retorted, a snarl expanding over his features at the idea. Y/N had a hard time looking at Hershel and when she did, Negan could see all that bravery and strength he knew in her from the past leaving. This man really did a number on her.
“I like the way it sounds,” Y/N explained feeling small. The last thing she should have felt was small with everything that she accomplished. Maggie stepped in beside her, offering up a weak smile. And that’s when things got worse for her. Now, not only was she dealing with the uncomfortableness from being around her family again, but she had to think about how the man she had an affair with last night was dating her older sister. Her older sister that she hadn’t seen in years. There wasn’t enough strength to muster up the words that were needed right now. So all she could do was focus on her father and what he said about her using her mother’s last name professionally. “I just was more comfortable using it.”
“It’s disrespectful,” Hershel chastised her response, shaking his head in disbelief. “I’m not surprised though. You were always eager to get away from this family.”
“Daddy,” Maggie interrupted Hershel trying to make things less confrontational in the best way that she could. Rolling his eyes, Hershel’s hands settled at his hips and he turned away from them. Turning her attention back to Negan, Maggie was still thinking about how Negan asked her that she had no idea that Y/N was his boss. “Y/N and I haven’t talked in a very long time. Originally, she was living somewhere else. I had heard she moved to the city, but I never really learned much more than that. If I would have known she was your boss, I would have said something. Obviously.”
“Why did the two of you stop talking?” Negan pointed back and forth between the two of them. It made Y/N frown and look down toward her feet. “It’s just…you’re both so different and…”
“You’re acting weird,” Erin commented, tugging at Negan’s jacket to get him to look down at her. “Why are you acting weird?”
“I’m not acting weird,” Negan scrambled to find the right words reaching down to pick Erin up in his arms. “I’m just surprised to see that the woman I work under is related to Maggie. That’s all. It’s something you think I would have known.”
“You are acting kinda weird,” Beau piped in, whispering low enough for his father only to hear. Tension filled his father’s body and the way that Negan was talking was the way he would talk when he was flustered or worried. “What’s going on dad?”
“These are your kids?” Y/N inquired trying to change the subject to take the attention off her and Negan in this moment. Of course they were his kids. They had dimples just like him and the boy looked like a younger version of Negan. Stepping forward, she extended her hand out before Beau and offered a weak smile. “It’s nice to meet you…”
“Beau,” Negan’s son accepted the gesture and shook her hand. “And you’re Y/N? We’ve heard a lot about you.”
“I assume not always the best things,” Y/N suggested, but Beau immediately shook his head, his hand still shaking hers.
“No, it’s always been good things,” Beau denied her negative thoughts and Beau wasn’t wrong. Negan wasn’t the kind of man to come home and vent to his children about the job that he wasn’t given. If anything, he talked about his projects and never went into detail about the things bothering him at work.
“I’m Erin!” Negan’s daughter immediately blurt out, her dimples sinking in when Y/N turned her attention to her. Y/N assumed that other than the dimples and the smile, Erin’s blonde hair and green eyes matched Negan’s late wife. Holding her hand out, Erin shook Y/N’s hand enthusiastically before burying her head against the side of Negan’s neck.
“I guess this is very awkward, isn’t it?” Maggie southern drawl brought all of the attention back to her. “I think we all have some catching up to do here.”
“Is now a good time to come out?” a voice interrupted them and it finally drew attention to the man that was slowly stepping out of the car. Maggie hadn’t expected someone to be there causing her to jump, slipping with her footing and the man caught her before she fell. Maggie clung to the jacket that the man was wearing and he let out a nervous laugh. “Sorry about that. I just, I didn’t know when I should come out and introduce myself.”
“It’s…okay,” Maggie’s head tipped to the side looking into the big brown eyes of the man clinging tightly to her. Once he made sure she was okay, he helped Maggie up into a standing position before stepping beside Y/N. His fingers hooked with Y/N’s and Negan shook his head.
“I’m Glenn,” Y/N’s fiancé held his hand up to wave and he was awkward. It was obvious that he wasn’t much of an outgoing personality. Glenn’s cheeks flushed over, his tanned flesh turning red while they all stood together in the group quiet. “I’m Y/N’s fiancé. I was told that people knew I was coming. I’m so sorry for interrupting whatever was going on.”
“No, of course!” Annette stepped forward to reach out to grab Y/N’s free hand. Tipping up, she pressed a kiss over the side of Y/N’s face and then hugged Glenn eagerly. “Y/N told me all about you. I’m so thankful that the two of you made it here. We were hoping you would.”
“It’s been a long time Y/N. You snagged yourself a cutie,” Beth interrupted moving in to introduce herself to Glenn and to give her sister another big hug. “I can’t wait to catch up. I need to have you tell me all about how you met this guy.”
“It’s not that big of a story,” Glenn chuckled shifting on his feet nervously before her family. Glenn was certainly uncomfortable and he showed it with everyone paying attention to him. Letting out a winded exhale, Glenn waved his hand about in the air. “Thank you for letting me be here with you on the holidays everyone.”
“Your face is red daddy,” Erin informed her father, stroking down over the side of Negan’s cheek. Trying to relax his expression, Negan knew that he likely had his face scrunched in jealousy and upset. Of course his face was red. He just found out the woman that he thought he connected and bonded with more than anyone since he lost Lucille was related to the woman that he was dating.
“I think it’s just the cold baby,” Negan tried to explain hearing Hershel grunt out and motion them forward.
“We’ll show you all to your rooms so you can get settled in,” Hershel urged them to follow him toward the large home. It was a charming, older home at the center of this land and Negan was sure it was beautiful on the inside, but it was so different from what he was used to.
“And then afterwards we can give you the tour of the farm,” Maggie moved in beside Negan to give him a small nudge. Giving her an unsure smile, Negan looked beyond her to see that Glenn was helping Y/N gather her things and he sighed. Shit, this whole weekend just got so much more complicated. All night, all Negan could think about was Y/N and now he was going to be forced to keep his feelings for her hidden.
Once inside, Hershel led the kids to their rooms first. Negan was surprised that they had a room for both Beau and Erin. Beau’s room had an old arcade game inside of it that immediately drew his son’s attention. Erin’s room had a lot of stuffed animals and toys that Negan assumed likely belonged to the girls when they were younger. Beau stayed with Erin to help her unpack while Hershel led them toward another room.
“I’m sure you know where your room is honey,” Hershel pointed to one of the doors that was closed and Maggie headed toward it. Going to follow Maggie, Negan heard Hershel clearing his throat to get Negan’s attention and Negan looked back over his shoulder. “Not in my house.”
“Sorry?” Negan was surprised to hear that comment from Hershel. What the hell was that supposed to mean?
“You’re still sticking to that? Why am I not surprised?” Y/N chuckled to herself, clinging to her things when Maggie stopped in front of her door to hold onto the handle. Disgust filled Y/N’s face and Negan clung to his things still unsure of what was happening. “We’re adults dad. I’ve lived with Glenn for months. You’re going to separate us into different rooms?”
“Daddy, come on,” Maggie pouted, pushing open the door and reaching for Negan, but Hershel immediately shook his head. “I’ve stayed at Negan’s place plenty of times. I have room for him to stay in there with me. I promise we’ll be on our best behavior.”
“Oh, you’ve had her over your home plenty of times?” Hershel repeated those words and suddenly Negan felt very singled out. His Adam’s apple bounced in this throat and he frowned. What the fuck was he supposed to say to that?
“I’ll just go and share a room with Beau. I don’t mind sleeping on the floor,” Negan suggested pointing back toward the rooms where his children would be staying. “I feel more comfortable being in the same area as my children anyways.”
“Your children will be perfectly safe. And don’t be silly Negan, you’re a grown man. You need a bed for yourself. With your important job, you’ll need your own space,” it felt like Hershel was almost mocking him and he waved Negan on. First Hershel showed Glenn to his room leaving Negan and Y/N as the last two people with him.
“I’m sure you remember where your room was? Unless you erased that from your memory too,” Hershel turned on his heel to stare out at his daughter.
“You mean you didn’t turn it into the junk room like you promised you would?” Y/N brought back tense memories that obviously happened between them when they were younger.
“Come on Negan,” Hershel waved Negan on, ignoring Y/N when she went for the room that was obviously hers in the past. When Hershel started to lead him toward some stairs, Negan let out a hesitant sound. “You’re going to be staying in the attic.”
“The what?” Negan followed Hershel up the stairs and into the attic. There was a big window that let in a large amount of light that was almost blinding. But he did notice once they were up there that there was a bed prepared. There were dressers, mirrors and things set up to make it feel homey, but at the end of the day…it was just an attic. With every second longer Negan spent with Hershel, he was noticing more and more that Hershel’s favorite was Maggie. Also Hershel was making it evident that he hated Negan for dating his daughter. “Are you sure we can’t just bring this bed down and put it in the room with Beau?”
“So neither one of you have enough room to move?” Hershel leaned against the wall, his eyes narrowing out at Negan. If looks could kill, Negan would be dead. It left Negan wondering what to say and really what to do. “Do you not enjoy the setup that we have done here for you?”
“It’s wonderful Hershel, but as a father, I’m sure you know how I feel wanting to be close to my children,” Negan reasoned with Maggie’s father, setting his things down on top of the bed and throwing his hands up in the air. “My children mean everything to me.”
“Which is why I picked this room for you. It’s right above the rooms that they will be staying in,” Hershel informed Negan, tapping his foot on the old wooden floorboards. “It’s spacious, you have your own space and you are right over your children.”
“I kind of feel like we started off on the wrong foot here Hershel,” Negan insisted rubbing his hands together. Stepping forward, he could tell by the look on Hershel’s face that he wasn’t going to change his opinion on him. “I very much like both of your daughters. One of them is my boss and the other has been in my life for about six months. I’d like to be able to get along with you sir because both Y/N and Maggie are important people in my life. And I think you’re important to them. So I’d really like it if you gave me a chance to prove myself to you.”
“Negan, I appreciate that you’re a good father,” Hershel looked down after Negan held his hand out in attempts to have them shake it out. “That’s something I admire about you. I see that your children love you. That, I will nod my head to. But the fact you’re dating Maggie is not something that I can accept. My daughter never wanted to be a city girl. She goes out there to test things out because of her sister and then she meets you. After she meets you, she decides that she wants to stay out there in New York City all alone. It just doesn’t sit right with me. A woman giving up her life for a man.”
“When I met Maggie sir, she was in an apartment of her own. She seemed very much moved in at that point,” Negan thought back to when he first met Maggie. Making it sound like Negan was the reason Maggie was in the city was kind of absurd. “I swear to you that I would never force your daughter into something that she didn’t want. I promise you that I didn’t soil your daughter.”
That was truthfully an understatement. Even when they had sex for the first time, it was Maggie that had dragged Negan back into the bathroom with her. Maggie seemed very comfortable with the idea of fucking a stranger she had just met and fought with. So it wasn’t like Negan got his claws into her and brought her to the dark side. Of course, he wasn’t about to tell her father that though. Her father thought Maggie was an angel and Negan was an evildoer that turned his daughter against him.
“I just want us to be okay,” Negan reasoned with Hershel, wanting nothing more than for things to be comfortable at least while he was here. Having the two women in his life having their father hate him was not something he wanted. “For Maggie. For my children.”
“I’ll be as friendly with you as possible Negan, but I don’t like you,” Hershel declared letting Negan know there wasn’t much of a chance between the two of them to lose the tension that was undoubtedly there. “Y/N might respect you. Maggie might be dating you. But I know the kind of man you are. And I just don’t see this whole thing working. I’ll see you downstairs.”
Lowering his hand, Negan huffed and shook his head when Hershel left him alone up in the attic. Walking around, Negan wondered what it was about him that made Hershel hate him immediately. Heading for the window, Negan stared out it to get a feeling for where he would be staying. At least the view was pretty enough. It would be a pain in the ass in the morning when he was sleeping with the sun rising, but he would have to just deal with it and find a way to make things work.
Maybe sometimes he would just sneak down to be with Erin at night because this was strange. Sure, it was quiet enough for him to work, but being alone in an attic while his children were downstairs left him feeling uncomfortable. He was separated from everyone. Even Glenn got his own room.
Instead of unpacking, Negan just headed downstairs to be with Beau and Erin. They were in the room that Beau would be staying in and they were both already at the old arcade game playing with it. They both seemed amused that he was staying in the attic, more so Beau because he understood that Negan was in hot water with Maggie’s father.
“Have you ever played something like this? This seems like it’s from your time period,” Beau glanced over at his father while in the middle of playing the game. It made Negan place his hand over his chest and let out a dramatic sound. “I’m just saying, it seems old.”
“And there it is, my boy calling me old,” Negan stood up from the bed that they had given Beau and moved in beside his children to look at the game. “See, I would play, but I’d just be so good at it that I would destroy your record…so…”
“Oh, yeah? Okay old man,” Beau teased his father hearing the snort that followed from Negan.
“I’m going to go check in with Maggie really quick. I’ll be right back,” Negan squeezed over Beau’s shoulder before peppering a quick kiss over Erin’s cheek and then going to the room they had left Maggie at. Knocking on the door, Negan heard Maggie call out to him to have him enter and Negan gave her a grimace when he snuck into her room. “Will I get shot for coming in here?”
“Depends on his mood,” Maggie half laughed motioning Negan into her bedroom as he closed the door behind him. Hopping onto Maggie’s bed, Negan grunted when he heard the squeak of a stuffed animal that he sat on. Digging underneath him, Negan lifted the stuffed animal out and wiggled it at Maggie noticing the color that flooded into her cheeks. “I know, I know.”
“So this was your room, huh?” Negan looked around the space taking in all the things that were there. Gazing from the posters on her walls, to the bookshelf and what was on her dressers Negan couldn’t help but snicker. “Did you sneak a lot of boys in here when you were younger?”
“Enough to give my daddy a heart attack,” Maggie set down what she was working on to sit on the bed with Negan. Extending her fingers out, she brushed them through Negan’s hair and led him to her lips in a lingering kiss.
“You should have warned me I was going to be a target coming in here,” Negan’s laugh vibrated against her bottom lip, leaning back enough to gaze over her. “Your dad hates me. Y’know he put me in the attic? While it’s a nice space, it’s still an attic with a lot of dust and you know I have really bad allergies.”
“Oh, you poor baby,” Maggie frowned brushing his hair back, leaning in to press a stronger kiss over Negan’s lips. It took a minute, but she giggled when she pulled away. “Did he really put you in the attic?”
“He sure fucking did,” Negan laid back against Maggie’s bed, looking up at the ceiling with a sigh. “Your family is intense.”
“We’re really not that bad,” Maggie suggested laying in beside Negan and placing her head on his shoulder. Hooking her fingers with Negan’s, she cuddled her head in closer to him and heard the snicker that followed.
“There are a lot of things to unravel here Maggie. You have a younger sister who is my boss and you had no idea she was my boss,” Negan pointed out with a huff, his mind still lingering on Y/N. “And your dad visibly hates her. You haven’t talked to her in years…”
“How did you know she was my younger sister?” Maggie wondered, lifting her head up to stare out at Negan with curiosity in her eyes.
“I’m pretty sure when you went to introduce us you said she was your younger sister,” Negan reasoned with Maggie and she shook her head. “Well, then it’s probably me putting two and two together. We talked about her family at one point and she mentioned being the middle child.”
“You talked about her family? About us?” Maggie lifted her head enough showing her surprise in knowing that her sister talked about their family to Negan. “I didn’t think your boss even liked you.”
“Yeah, well we had a heart-to-heart last night after finishing a project she had me working on all night,” Negan explained knowing that calling it a heart to heart may have been a good explanation for the first part of their time together, but there was also that other thing that they did together. That thing he wasn’t about to tell Maggie. Not when he was in the same house as her hostile father that would likely kill him if he found out he had an affair on Maggie.
“What did she tell you about us?” Maggie inquired, her eyebrow arching in curiosity and Negan didn’t know if talking about that would be right since it was the two of them bonding. “I can’t imagine it’s been good things since she’s been away from this family for so long. Things just got so difficult in the past with her and my dad.”
“Why did you stop talking to her?” Negan pushed knowing that he didn’t see Maggie as the type to turn her sister away. He wasn’t about to talk about the things that they went into last night. Especially not in depth. It was really none of Maggie’s business what they talked about.
“It’s complicated,” Maggie sat up enough to brace her weight while her fingers traced over the center of Negan’s chest. “Her and daddy had a fight. Y/N and I were always very close, she just had a really strong personality. We all loved her. I do love her. It just made it hard staying close to her when she left. Daddy got mad every time we mentioned her and then she moved away. I guess I just got used to her being gone.”
Maggie took her time to contemplate things letting out an extended sigh the longer she thought about things, “She’s actually the reason I finally took a chance on the city. I went out to New York because of her and I stayed because of the things she told me. She was always the more adventurous one. The real leader of the pack.”
“And you never tried to call her?” Negan was surprised to hear all of that, his hand reaching up to brush some of the hair that fell in her face away. It had Maggie reaching up with her other hand to caress over his. “You just don’t seem like that kind of person Maggie.”
“I think we both got lost,” she reasoned with Negan, her eyes shifting off in contemplation while her thumb caressed at Negan’s pulse point. “I need to talk to her again. Make things right. I know daddy was hard on her with things.”
“And you were…are…his favorite,” Negan noted lifting up enough so that he was close to her on the bed. “I think if anyone could have a good influence on your father to fix things for them, it’s you. The only thing she said about this family is that her father was really hard on her. I can see that. And that her older sister was his favorite. That’s clear as day. Especially in the way that man hates me.”
Both of them snickered when she pressed her head forward to rest it against his, “I’m sorry Negan. My father has some issues. With me caring about you, I would have hoped that he would have given you a chance. I love you.”
“I love you too,” Negan caressed his fingers over her jawline letting out a long sigh while he nuzzled his nose in against hers. It was sad because Negan really liked Maggie. They had a decent relationship, but he loved her more like a friend. So in a sense, he loved her, but it just didn’t feel like he was head over heels in love with her. “I do think you should try to fix things with your sister. She’s a good person. But I think she’s sad.”
“Sad? She’s the strongest person that I know,” Maggie tipped her head back enough, her lips parting when Negan swept his fingers in over her jawline. “I could never see her being sad.”
“I think she feels lonely,” Negan reasoned with Maggie, his head tipping from side to side while he thought about the night before. Sad understood sad. That’s what Negan tried to explained to Y/N last night. Maggie wasn’t sad, so it was harder for her to understand when someone was lost in themselves like both Negan and Y/N were.
“Why would she be lonely?” Maggie questioned and it made Negan sigh when her palm slid in over the side of his face. “She has an incredible job. If she’s your boss, that means she’s rolling in the dough. She’s engaged…she has the life a lot of people would want.”
“Sometimes…when you’re lonely…it doesn’t matter how good your life is in the eyes of others,” Negan thought back on his own life, his chest aching when he thought about the pain and anguish he had over being alone. “Sometimes when you are lonely, you make choices that don’t make sense to you because you never want to feel lonely again. Look at me. I have the two best kids I could ever ask for. An amazing job, a beautiful apartment in the city…but the loneliness, the sadness…it ate me alive for almost two years. And to this day…that darkness still engulfs me. I think it bothers her that she no longer has her family. She told me that her dad thought he was poisoning her sisters’ minds.”
“I can see how she thought that,” Maggie acknowledged, her thumb tracing over the side of his face through his short beard. “Why don’t you tell me that you feel that way Negan?”
“Because I try to hide it. I have two kids to keep happy. They don’t need to see that side of me. And you…you’re always smiling and happy,” Negan began shaking his head knowing that it probably wasn’t the best time to be telling Maggie these things. “Like you said, I should be happy. But I’m just not. And that scares me sometimes.”
It seemed like there was so much that Maggie wanted to say, but instead she moved forward to give Negan a hug. Something like that? That was the kind of affection Negan appreciated. Just having someone to talk to and hug him? A lot of the time, Negan didn’t think Maggie would be able to understand his feelings, but having her hug him like that was nice.
“I just want you to be happy Negan,” she whispered, pressing a loving kiss over Negan’s cheek, nuzzling her nose in against it. Pulling back enough, she dragged her thumb over Negan’s bottom lip which made him take in a long inhale. “No matter how angry you make me sometimes.”
“That happens a lot,” Negan joked with her, his nose wrinkling in amusement. Even though they did have a decent relationship, he could easily piss Maggie off and push her buttons. At least they were honest with each other about that. Closing his eyes, Negan felt Maggie pressing in closer to him. With her lips hovering over his, Negan hummed when she brought their lips together. Kissing her back, Negan’s fingers brushed into her hair, his fingers caressing over her scalp while she crawled in closer to him. Grunting, Negan felt her moving in over him, her hands cupping his face in her hands as her kisses grew in strength.
“Apparently dad is calling for us,” Y/N’s voice spoke up when the door pushed open and it made Maggie slightly pull away from Negan with a wet sound, her hands still cupping Negan’s face. Grunting, Negan could tell by the expression that flooded over Y/N’s face that she was upset catching them like that together. “I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to interrupt the two of you, dad just wants us to take the kids and the boys on the tour of everything.”
“Yeah, we’ll be there in a minute,” Maggie assured her sister with a half-smile, her finger sweeping over Negan’s jawline. “Thanks for letting me know.”
“Be careful with that,” Y/N circled her finger out toward them, her eyes locking with Negan’s. Noticing that Negan was breathing heavily, she wondered how far things would have gotten if she wouldn’t have walked in on the two of them. “You don’t want dad to bring the shotgun out.”
“Right,” Maggie snickered when Y/N closed the door behind her. Panic flooded Negan’s veins when Y/N left. Seeing that she looked upset bothered him. Then again, there was a mention of the shotgun and Negan deeply considered that.
“He really wouldn’t pull a shotgun out on me, would he?” Negan was hesitant in the way he laughed, but when he actually noticed that Maggie was contemplating that question, he felt his pulse leap. “Maggie? Would he?”
“It depends,” Maggie thought about the question and it put a look of fear in Negan’s features. “Don’t worry about it.”
“I’m gonna fucking worry about it,” Negan urged Maggie from over his hips to get her to sit down on the bed beside him. Getting up from the bed, he dragged his palm down over his face in a moment of tension. “That’s kind of a big deal Maggie. I don’t need your father shooting me dead with my children here.”
“He’s only pulled out the shotgun once before with one of my boyfriends when I was a teenager Negan,” Maggie reasoned with Negan hearing the worried sound that fell from Negan’s parted lips. “I’m an adult now Negan. My daddy wouldn’t do something like that.”
“I don’t know Maggie, by the way he’s acting toward me—I think he very much is capable of that,” Negan doubted what she was telling him. “I’m not going to get shot at on this trip, am I?”
“I think you’re going to be fine,” Maggie promised, stepping before Negan after getting off the bed. Caressing over the sides of his face was her attempt at calming him, but it wasn’t working. “Come on Negan, you shouldn’t worry about that kind of stuff.”
“After meeting your dad, yes. Yes, I fucking should,” Negan bickered with her more, but by the time that she was dragging him out in the hallway with her, he could see that the kids were outside talking to Maggie’s youngest sister who was showing them something.
“They are going to show us the horses,” Erin was excited to tell Negan about what was in their future when she turned away from Beth to run up before Negan. “I’ve never really been around horses daddy. Isn’t that exciting?”
“Of course it is baby girl,” Negan gave his daughter a wink, looking back when he heard the sound of a door opening. Seeing that it was Y/N heading out of her room, Negan lifted his finger up and motioned for them to go ahead without him. “I forgot something up in the attic. I’ll be right out. Okay? Watch the kids for me for a minute, would you Maggie?”
“You got it babe,” Maggie pat Negan on the chest before following Beau and Erin to the stairs.
Once they started heading down, Negan felt Y/N brushing past him to follow them. Before she could reach the stairs, Negan curled his fingers around her wrist to bring her to him. The nearest room for them was a bathroom and he pulled her in with him, closing the door behind him.
“What the hell?” Y/N gasped when Negan pushed her up against the door, his hazel eyes hooked on hers. Negan’s breathing was heavy, his lips parted while he stared down at her. “What the fuck are you doing Negan?”
“I’m sorry,” Negan apologized, his hands pulling from her shoulders and he rest his hands on his hips while he stood before her. “When you came into the room and saw Maggie with me like that…”
“Why are you apologizing to me because I walked in on you kissing your girlfriend Negan?” Y/N challenged, her eyebrows wrinkling in confusion. Throwing her hands up in the air, she sighed loudly and shifted before him. “I’m the one that is engaged to Glenn. I can’t get upset with you for being handsy with your girlfriend. I told you last night was just a high from the sex and confusion from the alcohol.”
“But it’s not,” Negan was adamant, shaking his head when she denied what they had last night. “All I’ve been able to think about since last night is you. I keep thinking about how you made me feel. Not just about the sex, but the connection that we have.”
“What connection Negan? You’re my sister’s boyfriend and you’re my co-worker. I’m your boss,” she reminded him, the hitch in her voice giving away that she was actually upset about everything. “This would have never worked in the first place. But now that you’re Maggie’s boyfriend? There is no fucking way Negan.”
“Why?” Negan frowned, attempting to reach out to touch her, but she grabbed his wrists and lowered them down.
“You know why Negan,” Y/N hesitated, her fingers squeezing slightly at his wrists. “There are so many reasons why none of this will work for us. We had a moment. We enjoyed each other very much, but it was a onetime thing. It can never happen again. You’re with Maggie. I’m with Glenn. We have to forget about it.”
“I don’t want to forget about it,” Negan pled with her, stepping forward to slam the door shut when she opened it to try to leave. Trapping her between him and the door, he took advantage of the small space that was there capturing her jaw between his thumb and index finger with his other fingers curling around the side of her neck. The warmth of his breath lingered over her lips drawing her eyes to fluttered to a close, her head tipping up toward him. “No, the chemistry between us is too strong Y/N. We both know it. We can’t pretend like it never happened.”
“Negan, please,” she whimpered right before his lips claimed hers. Placing her hand at the center of his chest, she could feel herself weakening at the knees with the way he was kissing her. Kissing him back was almost involuntary because her body knew even against better judgement that she loved kissing him. It felt good. Negan could sweep her off her feet with his kisses. And even though she tried to convince herself that it was a momentary lapse of bad judgement from being drunk, the response her body had to him kissing her was proving to her that wasn’t true. Purring out, she sank her fingers into Negan’s hair, her lips parting almost begging for him to reward her with the tender sweep of his tongue against hers. When he gave her what she asked for, he pressed his body against hers, his fingers growing tighter around the side of her neck. God she could get lost in this. Yet, it was the sound of movement outside the door that alerted her that she needed to stop this. Tearing her lips away from his was the hardest thing she could have done in that moment. Breathless, she knew that she needed to get her shit together. She was in her father’s home. Maggie was there and so were Negan’s children. They couldn’t do this shit. “This has to stop.”
“Wait,” Negan begged, but she pushed away from him and headed out of the bathroom. Trying to follow her, Negan got down the stairs with her. “Please, just wait.”
“Negan, enough,” Y/N didn’t stop or wait for them to even talk. Swiftly moving throughout the house, she pushed open the door and stopped immediately when she saw that her father had everyone with him standing at the steps. Her quick halt had Negan running into her and she gasped when he grabbed to make sure she didn’t fall. “You’re all just waiting here?”
“Well we couldn’t do a tour without the two of you, could we?” Hershel retorted with a huff waving them on. Swallowing down hard, Y/N managed to sneak away from Negan over to Glenn who was wearing a white long-sleeved shirt with a baseball jersey over it. He had a baseball cap on and Negan scoffed. Glenn didn’t even seem like Y/N’s type and he didn’t understand why she was with him. It’s not like he was a bad guy from what he could tell, it was just a strange pairing. “Let’s go Negan.”
“Yes sir,” Negan moved down the steps, reaching to grab Erin adjusting her so that he was giving her a piggyback ride while they moved across the yard. Standing between Beau and Maggie, Negan stole a glance over at Y/N noticing that she was looking at him while she walked hand in hand with Glenn. When their eyes connected, Y/N turned away and looked down at their feet.
“You’re going to love seeing Nelly. She was my horse,” Maggie tugged faintly at Erin’s jacket to get her attention. “If you want and it’s okay with your dad, I can probably take you on a ride. Would you like that?”
“Can I do that daddy?” Erin wondered making Negan look back over his shoulder at her. “I’ve never ridden a horse before.”
“You’re sure you’re capable of doing that with her and being safe?” Negan was worried knowing that with Maggie mentioning it, Erin wouldn’t be able to get it out of her mind. It’s just Negan was really uncomfortable with the idea of it.
“Maggie won a lot of awards when she was younger for horseback riding,” Beth’s voice called out from where she was walking beside Beau. “I think she will be okay.”
“I just worry,” Negan admitted trusting Maggie enough with his daughter, but horses were unpredictable. When Negan was younger, he would often visit the farm that his grandparents owned, but that was a long time ago. He always loved animals, but he knew that some animals when scared did things they didn’t always mean to. “If you think you can keep her safe, then I’ll trust you.”
“I can,” Maggie assured Negan with a half-smile while they headed over toward the stables on the property. Once the large doors opened, Negan stayed back and let out a long sigh knowing that this was the last thing he expected to be doing for Christmas this year. Touring a barn in the middle of nowhere. It was like he was back in his childhood days. “Nelly.”
Maggie was the first one into the barn heading over to the horse that was hers. It made Negan smile seeing the excitement that she had for it. It wasn’t normal for Maggie to have that kind of reaction to things and he was happy that she did have something that made her happy in some sense. Hershel followed her in and stepped in beside her reaching out to pet the muzzle of the horse.
“Come here,” Maggie waved Beau forward who seemed uneasy at first before joining them in petting the horse. Reaching for Erin, Maggie grabbed her from Negan and held Erin in front of Nelly to allow both Negan’s children to enjoy the moment.
“Do you have your own horse too?” Negan looked to Beth who was standing behind him and she immediately shook her head.
“No, we have a few horses here that I help take care of, but this one is Maggie’s and…” Beth moved around Negan to reach for Y/N’s hand pulling her sister down until they stopped in front of a stall. Seeing the horse seemed to have Y/N freeze up. “And this one is Y/N’s.”
“Dakota,” Y/N stepped forward to caress in over the horse’s mane. Seeing the horse appeared to have shocked her. “You kept him?”
“Of course I kept him,” Hershel grunted from where he was standing with Maggie and the children. “You may have abandoned him, but he didn’t deserve to be thrown away like the rest of us.”
Clearing his throat, Negan knew that he wanted to say something, but with how Hershel already felt about him it was best not to say anything at all. What came out of Hershel’s mouth hurt Y/N, there was no hiding the expression that flooded her features. Instead of staying where he was, Negan moved down the aisle to step in beside Y/N. With him next to her, she stole a quick look at him before Negan nodded toward Dakota.
“May I?” Negan asked for permission first to touch her horse. Once she gave him the okay, Negan flattened his palm out over the forehead of the horse that seemed to lean into the touch. “I take it you rode horses in the past too?”
“Yeah,” Y/N nodded and after Negan joined her, it felt like Glenn thought he had to as well moving in on the other side. “Dakota is my old man. We share a lot of memories together.”
“She gave up competitive horse riding, just like she did everything else,” Hershel piped in when he moved over toward them where they were at the stall. Y/N’s eyes closed tightly and she bit down on her bottom lip. Just by the way she was reacting Negan could tell she was doing everything she could not to fight with her father. Sliding his hand down, Negan’s fingers loosely hooked with hers to support her. It had her eyes lazily opening, her eyes connected with his and he gave her a weak smile. “Dakota was our most talented back then. Now, he just makes for a good pet. He’s too old to compete, but he sure is beautiful.”
“We’ve got Nelly, Dakota, Apollo, Lucky, Casper and Cinnamon,” Beth listed off the names of their horses, pushing her hands into her pockets when she let out a long sigh. “These are kind of our stars on the farm. We have other animals, but they are the ones people seem to be drawn to. We have chickens, hens, ducks, pigs…”
“We feed them every morning and evening so if you’re ever up and interested on this trip we will happily take the help,” Hershel informed them pacing the stables to check on all of the horses that were there. “We also have a barn on the property, but it’s really just used to store things. We have hay in there, food supplies. It’s not as interesting.”
“You want to go for a ride?” Negan heard Maggie ask Erin and he tensed up hearing it knowing that he agreed to it, but the idea of it made him nervous. Moving away from Y/N left it open for Glenn to whisper something to her as Negan went back to his children. Maggie noticed the worry in Negan’s eyes and she gave him a confident smile. “Trust me, everything is going to be okay.”
“You’re kind of holding my world in your hands, so…” Negan commented and it made Maggie smile as she handed Erin back over to Negan. Panic flooded his veins while Maggie got Nelly prepared to be ridden. Once Maggie had everything ready and they were standing outside, Maggie hopped up on the horse and reached for Erin. “You sure you don’t want to practice a little? By the sounds of things, it’s been a while since you’ve been on a horse.”
“It’s like riding a bike,” Maggie explained hearing Negan grumble when Erin reached her arms out to Maggie.
“A very unpredictable, living bike that can throw you off of them and break her,” Negan heard Beau choke and a laugh fell from his throat at his father’s worries. Once he handed Erin off to Maggie, he felt Beau’s hand pressing in over the center of his back trying to comfort him. “Please be safe.”
“I promise,” Maggie got Erin situated before starting to ride slowly across the plot of land.
“In this case, I trust Maggie,” Beau informed Negan while they watched the girls riding the horse. “I think she knows what she is doing dad.”
“It’s hard giving you kids away to other people and trust them to keep your lives safe,” Negan admitted to his son, his hazel eyes filled with worry. Clearing his throat uneasily, Negan saw that Y/N and Beth were both getting two other horses out to ride, but he was so stressfully focused on Maggie with Erin. “I love you both so much.”
“And we don’t doubt that,” Beau assured his father with a sigh hearing Hershel calling out to the both of them.
“You want to help me get these horses fed before the snow is supposed to start tonight?” Hershel asked of them and even though Negan wanted to watch to make sure that his daughter was safe, he agreed to do it. Beau was eager to help as well and Hershel had Glenn helping him too since all of the girls were out riding horses. “Beau, I’ll have you and Glenn go grab some of the grain from the back room I instructed Glenn to grab. Negan, there is a bucket that one of the horses kicked over in their stall that I need you to grab.”
“Sure,” Negan stepped before the stall that Hershel pointed at. Rubbing his hands together, Negan looked back at Hershel and shrugged. “Aren’t you going to grab the horse while I get the bucket?”
“Why would I do that?” Hershel folded his arms out in front of his chest. Letting out a hesitant sound, Negan stepped forward waiting for Hershel to open it for him. The horse remained still, but Negan paused thinking it over again. “Well go on son. I need to get this moving so the horse doesn’t get hurt.”
“I just kind of remember hearing something when I was a kid that you shouldn’t get behind a horse,” Negan explained to Hershel staring out at the larger horse knowing there wasn’t much room for him to move around it. “I think maybe you should get this guy out before I even attempt to grab it. My grandparents had a farm when I was younger and I just…”
“Forget it, I’ll just get Glenn to do it,” Hershel waved Negan off hearing him grunt under his breath before side stepping forward. Trying to move around the horse, Negan reached for the bucket to hear it jangle when he lifted it. It caused the horse to get uncomfortable, kicking its back legs out that Negan managed to avoid. Once the horse started jumping about, it had Negan scrambling to try to find a place for him not to get hurt. It ended up with Negan falling into the mud that was behind the horse face first, the horse running out of the stall and Hershel letting out a big belly laugh. “Well, you weren’t supposed to spook it son!”
“Dad?” Beau ran out to see that Negan was slowly pulling himself up from the mud. It was hard because Beau was worried, but at the same time amused to see that Negan was absolutely covered in mud. Instead of laughing, he tried to bite back on his amusement and stepped forward to help pull his dad up.
“Are you alright?” Glenn joined Negan in the stall, grabbing a hold of the other arm of him. Both Beau and Glenn were doing their best to avoid getting the mud on them that Negan was covered in. “What happened?”
“He spooked the horse,” Hershel explained to them, but Negan knew that he was set up from the start. He was lucky that he didn’t get killed from the horse trying to kick him.
“Daddy, why in the world was Apollo out…” Maggie came back after leading the horse that had run off back into the stalls. Once Maggie got a look at Negan, she turned on her heel and glared out at her father. “Daddy, what did you do?”
“What happened?” Y/N came back into the barn while Beth tended to their horses outside. All of them had headed back when they saw Apollo running free outside the barn. Erin moved in beside Y/N letting out a worried breath when she saw Negan.
“He had me grab a bucket and told me we didn’t need to move the horse for me to get it,” Negan claimed tossing the bucket out in front of Hershel who looked amused with his antics. “I almost died.”
“Don’t be ridiculous. You’re fine,” Hershel blew off Negan’s words, but it immediately had both Maggie and Y/N infuriated with him. “Your boyfriend is being a little emotional right now because he’s embarrassed that he fell in mud and who knows what else.”
“This is just like you,” Y/N stormed around her father toward the back office to grab a towel for Negan. Moving forward, she tried to help him get some of the mud from his face hearing her father cackling in the back. “Negan never had a fucking chance with you. You know that Apollo gets antsy around people. Yet you did this anyways.”
“What is that supposed to mean?” Hershel threw his hands up in the air acting innocent with his actions. “We were just getting ready to feed the horses. You can ask Beau and Glenn. They will tell ya. There was a bucket in there that I didn’t want Apollo to get hurt on and Negan went to get it. It’s not my fault that he spooked the horse.”
“She’s not wrong daddy. You knew that Apollo would do exactly what he did. We’ve always known Apollo to be like this,” Maggie shamed her father, moving forward to reach for the towel that Y/N had knowing that Negan was her boyfriend and it should be her that was helping him. “You’ve been like this with all of my boyfriends. And this time it’s not right. Negan had Beau and Erin here. He’s a father and I won’t stand by this behavior. These pranks are dangerous and if you pull another one, we’re going to leave. I love you daddy and I want to be here, but this is the last time.”
“I see,” Hershel’s glare on Negan was extreme, if there was a chance that he would ever like Negan it went right out the window at that moment. With Maggie threatening him to leave, it sure as hell made Hershel hate Negan. Especially having his favorite daughter defending the man he just tried to potentially kill. Looking to his watch, Hershel huffed and shrugged his shoulders. Sucking on his bottom lip, Hershel pointed at the stalls and sighed. “We are supposed to meet your cousin at the restaurant we go to every year. We need to get these horses fed and head out.”
“You know, I don’t think I’m going to be able to go to any restaurants,” Negan called out from where he was standing knowing that he was soaked in mud. “I think the only thing calling out to me right now is a shower. Maggie, do you mind watching over Beau and Erin at dinner?”
“Of course baby,” Maggie went to touch him, but then thought it over for a second with how dirty he was. “I’ll get you a meal and bring it home.”
“You might want to hose him down first before he goes in the house. We don’t need him trekking that mud throughout the whole house,” Hershel blew off the idea of Negan, not a care in the world that he almost just killed Negan.
More than anything Negan wanted to rip into this man. For what he had done to him. For his nasty comments toward Y/N, but Negan kept his mouth shut. This was the first day and he was going to be stuck in the same home with this man for a while.
“I’ll help you dad,” Beau led Negan toward the hose he had seen in the back with Glenn when they had grabbed the grain that Hershel had asked them too. When they were alone, Beau nodded back toward Maggie who was getting help from Glenn getting Apollo back in the stall. “I know you like Maggie, but are you starting to think now about how you should probably let this romance go?”
“Beau, I don’t even know what to say right now,” Negan grumbled under his breath splashing some water in his face and getting his clothes clean from the mud. “I had no idea her dad was a psychopath.”
“It just looks like you’re dating the wrong daughter,” Beau suggested and it immediately made Negan lift his head up to stare out at Beau. “I mean, he’s not trying to kill Glenn. You should be dating Y/N because at least if you were dating her, you’d be safe.”
Beau was trying to joke with Negan, but he had no idea how Negan actually felt about her so it made the conversation awkward.
“I remember grandpa giving you a hard time, but this guy…” Beau shook his head when he stole another look back at Hershel. “He’s got issues.”
“Understatement of the year,” Negan noticed that Erin was walking out to them to check on him. Offering up a big cheesy smile had Erin giggling. “Daddy is just going to take a shower. You be good for your brother and Maggie, okay?”
“Of course daddy,” she tipped up on her toes to press a kiss over the side of Negan’s cheek when he leaned down. “I’ll wait until you are dry for the hugs.”
“Good choice baby girl,” Negan winked at his daughter, said his goodbyes to everyone once he was ready to head into the house with the towels they had given him to dry himself off. To the best of his ability at least. He was careful not the mess the house when he made his way to the second level bathroom where he was earlier with Y/N. At this point, he was just thankful to have a break from the whole Greene family.
A hot shower gave him time to think things out. Maybe it was just best to avoid Hershel this whole trip. Bury himself in his work at every chance and just stick to his children. It may have been the only way for him to stay alive and not get himself killed. It took a while for the water to get hot before Negan hopped into the shower. This was nothing like his home and his modern shower that he had. It was old fashioned to the core and it brought back old memories for Negan.
After his shower, Negan got dressed and draped the towel over his shoulders. He figured he would just work for a while until everyone got back home. At least in the attic he would have his own space and be safe from getting hurt. Heading up the stairs to the attic, he let out a surprised breath when he saw that Christmas lights were now lighting up the space. It made his heart skip a beat when he saw that someone was hanging them up. Dropping his head, Negan closed his eyes when he thought back to his past when Lucille would do the same kind of thing. Pinching his nose, he cussed to himself hating that a memory from his past hit him so hard.
“Are you okay?” Y/N’s voice called out to him making Negan lower his hand to stare out at her from where she was standing on a chair stringing up some lights. “I heard that my dad put you up here and I thought…I would just make it homier. So it feels more like a holiday for you.”
“You didn’t have to do that,” Negan insisted, going to put his dirty clothes in a bag so that way things were still clean. Actually, Negan was impressed. She got out a lot of things while he was in the shower. There was a faux tree in the corner of the attic with light strung up that she was finishing. “What are you doing here? I thought everyone was going out to dinner.”
“Yeah, well…I told them I got a call from work and that I wouldn’t be able to go with them,” she explained to Negan as he stepped in beside her and attempted to help her with what she was finishing up. “I lied. But I told Glenn to go with them, so it’s just us here.”
“Oh?” Negan’s eyebrow arched in curiosity while she outstretched just far enough to let out a tense breath. Placing his hand over the small of her back, Negan made sure that she was safe before she returned to a flat-footed position.
“I wanted to check in on you and help with this…” she threw her hands up to look around the place that her father had thrown Negan for the time that they were there. “Thankfully my father is predictable and keeps the decorations in the same place he did when I was a kid so this was easy to do. All we need is a few stockings and some decorations on the tree. The tree already had lights in it so we don’t have to do that.”
“Yeah?” Negan mused, finding himself curious with the way that she was. This was something he would have found Lucille doing in his past, so the fact this is what she was doing enamored him. “This is nice.”
“I hope it makes you feel more comfortable,” she finished with the lights, grabbing Negan’s hand when he helped her down from the chair. Stumbling, she fell in against Negan’s chest and his hazel eyes narrowed down at her. “It’s the least I could do with what my father did.”
“He’s crazy,” Negan noted without even thinking about it. There was no fucking around. Hershel hated him and it was clear as day. “He tried killing me today with that horse.”
“I told you my dad was something else,” she reminded him, patting him on the center of the chest when she pushed herself into a standing position before him. “I don’t know why I bothered coming here. It was stupid to begin with. The only thing it did was fuck everything up more.”
“I know you’re upset you saw me kissing Maggie,” Negan frowned folding his arms in front of his chest noticing that she was having a hard time looking at him. “I told you, I’m not in love with Maggie. What I said about my girlfriend was true. It doesn’t change things now that it’s Maggie.”
“Negan, it changes everything,” she shook her head moving around him to start putting some of the decorations on the tree. “Maggie is my sister. They can’t find out that I had sex with her boyfriend. I told you that Maggie was my dad’s favorite. If it comes out, my dad will try to kill you and who knows what he will do to me.”
“You’re worth the worry,” Negan claimed grabbing a few of the decorations to help her put them on the tree that she put out for him. “I don’t care if Maggie is your sister. I know how I feel about you. I love Maggie, but I love Maggie in a way that someone loves one of their best friends. I’m not in love with Maggie. We don’t have that spark that I’ve been missing. The spark that you and I have...”
“You’re making this complicated Negan,” she reasoned with him, trying to focus on the tree and less on him. “You’re with my sister. You’re dating my perfect, loved, popular older sister. And there is nothing we can do to change that. It’s best we pretend that what happened the other day is nothing but a dream between us.”
“I don’t want to pretend,” Negan hushed her, grabbing her and forcing her to look at him. “Y/N, what we felt the other night, it was incredible. The sex was great, sure, but what we felt…how alike we are. When I see you, you remind me of everything I loved in the past.”
“We can’t talk like this Negan,” she declared only to feel his hands grabbing a hold of hers leading her toward the bed to sit down on it. “Negan?”
“Just talk things out with me for a minute,” Negan begged of her, his thumbs stroking in over the back of her hands. By the look over her face, he knew that she was trying to avoid this stuff, but he needed to talk to her. “First of all, Glenn is cute and everything, but that guy seems way too boring for you.”
“Glenn is cute?” she repeated what he said, her eyebrows bouncing up in amusement. “The reason you think he is boring is because you’re…you.”
“He barely talks and anytime someone looks at him, he blushes,” Negan thought back to her fiancé and he shook his head. “Come on Y/N. You’re a ball busting bad ass that grabs men by the balls and makes them do whatever she wants whenever she wants.”
Instead of saying anything, she rolled her eyes and shook her head. He knew with her being here that her ego would be smaller and he hated that for her. Especially with how her father treated her about things.
“What did you and your father fight about?” Negan pondered the thing that he had heard mentioned several times. “The thing that made you stop talking.”
“They all stopped talking to me after that,” Y/N alerted Negan with a half laugh, but he knew that it hurt her. It didn’t make her feel good to think about it. A sense of shock flooded her veins when Negan’s fingers hooked with hers, his eyebrows furrowing in the hopes of understanding how she felt. Holding her hand like that was his way of showing support and he could tell that it took some coaching inside of herself to open up to Negan. “I was leaving for college. He wanted me to stay out here. Run the farm like the rest of the family. I didn’t want that. I loved art, my father thought it was a useless talent. I got accepted to an art school in the city and it was everything I wanted, but he didn’t give me his approval. Told me if I went out there, I would be out on my own. He’d never help me. I told him that he cared more about his life and what he wanted for his family than what his family actually wanted. I told him he was holding his family back and he’d never let them truly live. He told me if I left, he was going to get rid of my horse, my things and never speak to me again. He did one of the three. If it was up to him, I wouldn’t be here right now. It was Beth and Annette that reached out to me.”
“That’s rough,” Negan sighed, his thumb sweeping over the back of her hand while he held onto it. “Your parents should always push the best for you. They should want you to achieve your dreams. Not live the dreams that they wanted.”
“Sounds like from our conversation you know exactly what it was like with your father,” she reasoned with Negan who snorted and shook his head.
“My father wanted me to be a ball player more than anything. Bragging rights to his friends really,” Negan thought back to when he was younger and he simply shrugged his shoulders. “But I got hurt and after that he really didn’t give a shit.”
“Your dad and my dad are such assholes,” she suggested dropping back on the bed that was Negan’s with a sigh. Carefully moving in beside her, Negan laid with her and gazed over at her with his big eyes. Still even laying down they were holding hands and it was strange how comfortable she found herself with Negan. “I should have just kept giving you shit last night. Told you what a piece of shit you are. Instead of kissing you like I did.”
“I am a piece of shit still,” Negan snickered, his eyebrows bouncing up in amusement when she tipped her head to connect her eyes with his. “Just because you like me doesn’t mean it’s a bad thing. I like you too. What happened between us, it was meant to happen. I wish you could see that.”
“Your son and daughter are beautiful,” she complimented him knowing that she hadn’t really focused on that bit. It was easier to bring up his children instead of concentrating on what he was saying between them. “Your son looks exactly like you. And your daughter has the dimples and the smile. You can tell they are your children. It’s cute.”
“Yeah, they are pretty cute. It’s how they get away with everything,” Negan responded showing that he was genuinely happy talking about his children. “Thankfully for Erin she got most of her mama’s looks. Beau, he’s awesome. Good at everything. Amazing artist. Better than I ever was at his age, but I think this whole Christmas thing is effecting him more than anyone without his mom. His mom and him were really close. So this time of the year is rough for him. He does his best, but…”
“He’s still human,” she noted giving Negan time to think about it before exhaling loudly and nodding. “They are lucky to have you. You can tell you love them. It’s sweet. Do they like Maggie?”
“Yes…and no,” Negan laughed out loud remembering what his kids were like last night. “Maggie is very…uptight. And their mother wasn’t. So they like her, but they don’t. If that makes sense.”
“It does,” she found herself leaning her head in closer to Negan’s while they laid there. “My sister is bubbly, friendly, but she needs to be in control of everything. It all has to be perfect and precise. And while I understand that, there needs to be wiggle room for more.”
“Maybe…maybe we can just run away with the kids?” Negan stammered, his words coming out in a stutter. The suggestion alone made her scoff thinking it was a joke. “I can break up with Maggie, you can let Glenn go and I’ll just take you back to my apartment. We can decorate the thing. It could use your touch and the kids would like it. What you even did with this room in the time that you had is incredible.”
“Knock it off,” she poked Negan in the ribs. The idea sounded ridiculous, but running away from here didn’t sound all that bad. Especially if it was with Negan.
“Are you less interested in me because I have children?” Negan wondered interested in finding out why she didn’t want to be with him now.
“If anything, I’m more interested in you for being a father. It’s sexy seeing how much you love your kids and the way there is a glimmer in your eye just talking about them,” she confessed stroking her fingers over the center of Negan’s palm. “You know why I can’t run away with you. It was wrong before, it’s worse now that you are with Maggie. They already hate me as it is.”
“Maggie doesn’t hate you, Maggie just is her father’s puppet,” Negan corrected with a scoff knowing how capable people were of persuading their children to think one way or another. “But if that’s how you feel, then what do you care what they think if we get together?”
“You don’t want that Negan,” she went to ramble on until Negan’s fingers were curling underneath her chin to urge her jaw up. Brushing his lips over hers, Negan made the gesture soft and sweet. After all the stress of today it felt nice and she found herself getting more comfortable against him. “You make it hard to focus when you kiss me.”
“You like kissing me,” Negan snickered against her flesh, nibbling at her bottom lip. Teasing the tip of his tongue over her lips had her lips parting, her head arching up with her fingers curling around his neck. Brushing his tongue in against hers, Negan groaned out when her fingers sank into his dark hair. “I haven’t been able to stop thinking about you since last night. I know what I want.”
“You don’t. It’s just like a drug Negan,” she tried to hush him hating how easily she was falling back into all of this. With Negan’s palm caressing up over the lengths of her abdomen and toward her breast, she purred when he cupped it tenderly. “You had a taste once and you think you need more of it.”
“I don’t think, I know,” he growled against her lips, nipping faintly at her flesh. Kissing down over her jawline and toward her neck, Negan couldn’t help himself. Even though they were alone in her family’s home, that didn’t affect him. “I want you more than you could ever begin to understand.”
“Negan,” she grabbed a hold of his wrist attempting to get him to pull his grasp from her. “You’ve slept with Maggie.”
“I’m pretty sure Maggie has slept with a lot of people,” Negan commented, his eyelids heavy and his eyes filled with want for the woman he had in his arms. “You shouldn’t feel bad for the way that things are. Yeah, the world has a fucked-up way of making these things work, but we both knew last night that what we wanted wasn’t Glenn or Maggie.”
“Last night we were drunk,” she was doing her best to contain herself with the warmth of Negan’s breath over her lips. Getting drunk on Negan’s kisses was something she longed for and she wasn’t holding him off very well. “We were saying things.”
“But they were all true,” Negan huffed, his lips claiming hers again drawing her to turn in closer to him. “I haven’t had a fire inside of my heart like I do when I’m with you in a very long time. And I know you feel it too.”
“I have been such a bitch to you over the last few months and suddenly you are smitten with me?” she pulled her lips from his, her hand placing in over the center of his chest trying to talk some sense into the both of them. “Yes, you are incredibly sexy and I find myself drawn to you, but I’m your boss. I took advantage of you last night…”
“I don’t care if you are my boss. I like when someone is feisty. I’ve always been attracted to people in power,” Negan reached for her hand, bringing it up to his mouth to deposit a kiss over the center of her palm. Shuddering, her eyes fluttered to a close when he started pressing his kisses down over her pulse point. “I promise I’m a good boy. I will be able to do my work and still be endlessly yours after work.”
“Fuck…” she whimpered with his tongue flicking out over her flesh drawing chills to flood her body. “Negan, this is wrong…good people don’t do this. Nice people don’t do this.”
“I don’t think I’ve ever been accused of being good Y/N,” Negan rumbled, his lips hovering back over hers again when he pressed his body in closer to hers. Warmth radiated from his body beside her and she felt a chill flooding her spine. “But for you…I’ll be whatever you want me to be. I just want to be yours so incredibly fucking bad.”
“But Maggie…” she whined with Negan’s lips skimming in over hers. Guilt did eat away at her with how much she found herself wanting to be near and around her sister’s boyfriend. Palming down the lengths of her body, Negan hooked his arm around her leg and drew her closer to him to hook it around his hip. “I can tell she likes you.”
“Maggie will survive. Glenn too,” Negan assured her, his fingers sliding up underneath her shirt. Once his rough fingertips collided with the warmth of her flesh, it had her raising up toward him wanting so badly to feel it. “But I won’t if I can’t be with you.”
“That’s dramatic,” she purred, her fingers dragging down over his chest reaching between them. Lowering her hand just enough, she palmed over the front of Negan’s pants making him pull his head back enough to look down at her touching him. His lips were parted, his pupils dilated and breathing heavy.
“I’m a dramatic kinda guy,” Negan smirked, his eyes connecting with hers. Nodding his head, he could see both the amusement and desire that she had for him. “If I can’t be with you, I’ll just fucking die. And then what? You’ll take me away from my kids. You don’t wanna do that to them, do you?”
“Way to make me feel guilty,” she snickered, her fingers working with the belt of Negan’s jeans while she adjusted him so that he was laying on his back. Crawling in closer to him, she got his pants open but kept her eyes locked with his. “You’re crazy.”
“I know,” Negan agreed with her, his hips arching up when she pulled down the zipper in his jeans. “It’s a bit of a problem really.”
“Oh?” her eyebrow arched drawing his smile to grow bigger and he nodded. “Maybe you’re too much trouble for my liking.”
“No, I’m the perfect kind of trouble. I’ll be as good or as bad as you want me to be,” Negan slurred, his breathing growing harder when she pushed his shirt up toward the center of his chest. Wincing, Negan enjoyed the way she kissed over the center of his abdomen, up toward his chest before circling her tongue around his nipple. Having her sucking and then faintly nipping at the flesh had his raspy moan filling the attic. “I think we both know that we want this…”
“You promise to be good for me?” her fingers traced shapes over his abdomen before sinking beneath the material of his boxer briefs. Once her fingertips connected with the root to his masculinity, it had his hips arching up toward the warmth of her touch.
“I do,” Negan nodded his head eagerly, dragging his tongue across his bottom lip when her fingers curled around his body to test the flesh in her grasp. “I want to be yours. Endlessly fucking yours. Please.”
“I pinned you to be a dominant alpha male Negan. But you’re acting so submissive,” she pointed out placing her leg over his to almost pin him down. Separating the material of his pants, she helped pull his cock out of the tight confines they were prisoned behind while she stroked over his distended flesh. “Look at you.”
“I’m both. Whatever the moment calls for,” Negan whispered, his dimples sinking in and the vein at the side of his neck becoming more prominent when he lifted his head to watch her touching him in tender sweeps that had him growing harder with every movement. “If you take a chance on me, you will see.”
“It does sound appealing,” she kissed down over his jawline enjoying the sounds that Negan was making. It didn’t take long for him to be completely solid in her grasp and she enjoyed the way he felt in her palm. “I do want to see where things are capable of going with the two of us Negan. I just need you to be a good boy and keep this hidden for just a little while longer. Can you do that? Just while we’re here?”
“What do you mean hidden?” Negan moaned while she pumped his length in her hand, her fingers firmly grasping to his flesh.
“I just mean we can’t tell Glenn or my family about this yet. I need this time with my family, but I know I want to spend time with you too,” she informed him having his hips arching up toward her caress while she jerked him off. Whining out, Negan felt her fingers releasing him but then he watched her lick at her fingertips before wrapping them back around his flesh. “Once this whole trip is over, then maybe we can put things into motion.”
“I can’t hide the way I feel about you,” Negan panted lifting his head up to watch her jerking him off. Behind his long eyelashes, his eyes were desperate and his moans were loud. It was exactly the kind of thing she wanted to hear and listen to from him.
“I’m not asking you to hide it when it’s just the two of us, but around my family I need you to be careful,” she instructed pampering his lips with wet kisses as she continued to pleasure him. “I just think this is something I need to do with my family in order to fix me. But I want to be with you too. We just can’t officially do that yet.”
“Okay,” Negan panted, his eyebrows tensing and the lines in his forehead growing with how she was jerking him off. “If this is what you need, I will do fucking anything for you.”
“It’s surprising how perfect you actually are,” she slurred against his lips hearing his grunts growing louder. “You really are my good boy, aren’t you?”
“I am,” Negan nodded his head, licking his lips when he felt his abdomen tensing up. Growling out, Negan nuzzled his nose in against the side of her neck when the first line of his cum shot out from the tip. Moaning against her flesh had her mewling out while she continued her caress over his cock milking him of his release. Thick ropes of cum covered his lower abdomen and chest while she continued to jerk him off. Once she released his member, he felt his heart hammering inside of his chest with his throat going dry. “Shit.”
Cuddling her head in against his shoulder, she looked up at the roof of the attic and sighed, “I never saw myself as the cheating type, yet…here I am. Having an affair with the man I thought I was supposed to hate. The man dating my sister,” she frowned caressing over his abdomen, her fingers teasing through the mess of his release. “I have to be crazy after all.”
“Or maybe you just found the thing that you finally needed,” Negan suggested, his finger curling underneath her jawline to get her to look up at him. “Maybe we just found the thing that was missing this whole time. Each other.”
----
Tags: @slutlanna976 @fuckthis-and-fuckthat @jennydehavilland @de-gabyconamor @ibelongtonegan @smallsadjellyfish @labyrinthofheartagrams @msjamesmarch @thebeautysurrounds @hotfornegan @redmercysugar @caprithebunny @tuttifuckinfruitty @emoryhemsworth @a-girl-interupted @akumune @stoneyggirl2 @xsarcasticwriterx @haleygreen23 @xhannahbananax03 @sanctuaryforthelost @burningredaffair @killaweiser @dead-of-niight @ayumi-wolf @hollyismentallyillhelp @promiscuousbarnes @tone-stark @lanadelnegan @flippittygibbitts @stickyhuesos
#Jeffrey Dean Morgan#Negan#Negan fanfiction#negan x reader#The Walking Dead#twd fanfiction#negan x you#negan smut#Negan smith
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Heartstrings Tangled
Request: Hey 😊 could I ask for an Antonio Dawson imagine where you're dating and also work for the intelligence but one time he gets really distant as he doesn't want you in trouble due to your job but you think he doesn't want you anymore. One day you get shot during a mission and you nearly die. You're out for a while and Antonio never leaves your side, feeling terrible for letting this happen. When you wake up it's all fluffy, he apologizes and promises to never let you out of his sight again 🤗
Pairings: Antonio Dawson x Reader
Warnings: angst, fluff, inaccurate police talk
Being in a romantic relationship with Antonio Dawson was a dream, he treated you like royalty that is until you got to work, you understood that dating coworkers was a no go but you both just loved each other dearly, or so you thought. You didn’t think anything was wrong with your relationship but him pulling away and basically not speaking to you unless it was related to work was throwing you for a loop and you were not liking it.
The both of you had just woken up and were getting ready for the day. “Hey, babe?” You yelled out from the bathroom as you were brushing your teeth.
“Yes?” He asked coming in to meet you.
“Do you think we could get some Chinese food tonight for supper? There is a new place that opened up and I heard that it was good.” You said as you put your toothbrush in its holder and turned to look at him.
“I would be down for that. I heard it was good too.” He said and smiled at you and then you headed into the kitchen to eat a little something for breakfast and then you both were on your way to work.
You had both rode into work together after all you both lived together. You both got out of the car and met each other in front of the car and your hand connected. As soon as your foot hit the step of the precinct steps his grip on your hand would disappear. This confused you “Everything ok?” You asked when you noticed his hand no longer in yours.
“Yes, why?” He asked and continued on into the building as you followed.
“Well, you just stopped holding my hand is all.” You said and he stopped to enter the passcode on the key pad.
“Keep your voice down. We’ll talk about it later.” He said once the gate buzzed and that left you confused as ever but you continued up the stairs behind him. What you didn’t see was the frown on his face as you entered the bullpen.
“Um ok.” You said. When you would go in for a kiss, he would basically pull away from you and didn’t return it. It was truly messing with your feelings and your heart. You both walked to the locker room and stood in silence as you got what you needed and when you closed your locker you turned to look at him. “I love you.” You said and went into for a kiss but he just pulled away and walked away. You stood there speechless. What had you done wrong from the car to the precinct? You walked out and headed to your desk and sat down getting to work and failing to notice him look at you with a hurt look on his face. He watched a tear fall down your face but you quickly wiped it away and kept working not even once looking up. His attitude had changed drastically once you arrived and it hit you like a ton of bricks.
Kim and Erin had noticed your change in behavior and decided to talk to you about it. They knew about your relationship with Antonia so when you came out of the locker room and sat down and started crying they wanted to the bottom of it. They both looked at each other and got up and strolled over to your desk and you looked up giving them a questioning look. “Can I help you both?” You asked and they grabbed you arm and hauled you up and into the locker room making sure nobody was following.
“What’s wrong?” Erin asked and you just looked at her.
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” You said trying to deflect the question.
“Come on Y/N/N. We saw the tear slip when you sat down.” Kim said and that is when the tears started pouring.
“I don’t know what I did wrong.” You said and sat down on the bench and they looked at you to continue. “He was all loving this morning and then when we got here his demnor changed.” You spilled your feelings out to them.
“Oh, honey. He’s just being stupid.” Erin said and kneeled in front of you and looked at her.
“Did I do something wrong? Is he embarrassed of me?” You asked them still crying and they shook their head.
“No. No don’t think like that. None of this is your fault. Like Erin said he’s just being stupid. He doesn’t know what he’s doing.” Kim said. What you didn’t know was that Antonio was outside listening while he went to go and get something to drink. Having heard you crying made him stop, he never wanted to hurt you like this, that was not his plan. He just wanted to keep you out of trouble with Hank.
“I don’t think he wants to be with me anymore.” You said
“How long has this been going on?” Erin asked
“Almost 2 months. At first, I thought it was just because he was having rough nights and everyone has been stressed about the drug deal case we have been working on. His attitude would change once we got home.” You said and that broke your heart and his. “I think we’ve been gone too long.” You said and started to get up and that is when he took off not wanting to get caught. By the time he got back to the bullpen you were already at your desk but didn’t once look up. Most of your day was filled with paperwork and nothing too exciting. If he wanted to play this game then so be it, you would play the game too. It was rolling into the afternoon when Hank came out of his office.
“Alright listen up.” Hank said and you all came around to listen to him. Antonio tried to stand next to you but you moved to where you were standing between Erin and Kim. “I just got intel about a drug deal from one of our undercover cops that is about to go down on the case we have been working on and I want to be there to stop it before it can happen.” He said and everyone nodded and went to gear up. As you were putting on your bulletproof vest you looked up and saw Antonio looking at you, he could see the hurt in your eyes but you just walked away.
You rode with Jay as you were going to the drug meet up place you two began talking. “Are you ok?” He asked and you looked at him.
“Antonio is acting weird. He acts like he hates me whenever we get to work. I think he doesn’t want to be with me anymore.” You said. You had known the Halstead brothers for a long while you were practically their sister.
“Is that why you’re being quiet for the past two months?” He asked and you nodded.
“I’m gonna kill him.” He said but you all pulled up
“Jay, please don’t. I still love him.” You said and he nodded. You both got out and put on your working face and went over to Hank.
“Ok. I you guys know what do. I want everyone to be safe and communicate.” He said and you all nodded. As you were walking over to Jay’s truck Antonio came up to you.
“Babe. Listen-“ He began but you cut him off.
“I don’t want to hear it. If you want to break up then so be it. I’ll move out after this case.” You said and walked away from him leaving him behind.
You all waited for at least 10 minutes before any activity showed but you guys were ready. You watched with Jay as the undercover cop and the drug dealer and his men rolled up. Once the exchange started happening you all came out of hiding and the ones in vehicles turned on their sirens.
“Chicago PD!” Hank yelled out and then guns were drawn it was a standoff. “Put your weapons down!” He yelled out and then shooting began and everyone returned fire. A lot of the other men took off and some of them were down injured and some dead. You ducked behind a crate when a bullet had nearly hit you. You somehow got split up from Jay as he was on the other side ducking behind his own crate but still was able to see him.
“Are you ok?” He asked and you nodded.
“Yea. I’m ok. You?” You had asked him.
“Yea, I’m good.” He said and you nodded. You took a breath and then came out of hiding and began to shoot. You had hit one of the men but he had also shot at the same time. His had grazed your upper arm and your bullet had lodged into this shoulder. You ducked behind the crate again and hissed you looked at your arm and saw the blood. You looked over to Jay and he looked over to you and made sure the coast was clear and then came running over to you. “Are you ok?” He asked looking at the wound. Gunfire was all around you.
“Yea. It was just a graze.” You said and then stood up to began to shooting but didn’t draw your gun quick enough and everything felt like it was in slow motion. A bullet that was fired from one of the men had hit you just below the bullet proof vest and as you were processing what had happed you looked over to Jay and he had a look of horror on his face. Then you felt another one goes into the right side of your neck and you went down like a sack of potatoes. You didn’t know which one to put pressure on so you just laid there gasping for breath. Jay popped up and finished off the man and then ran to you and pulled you into safety. Then the gunfire stopped and everything sounded like it was underwater. You could hear Jay on the radio but couldn’t answer. All you wanted was Antonio.
“5021 George, officer down. I repat officer down. I need medical assistance immediately.” He said and then you passed out.
——————————————————————
Antonio’s world stopped when her heard Jay’s voice over the radio and ran to them. He saw Jay putting pressure on your neck and abdomen. He ran over to you both and tried to help but Jay just glared at him. “Back off. You’ve done enough damage.” He said and Antonio was hurt at his words but backed off. That didn’t stop him from kneeling by your side.
“Come one baby. Stay with me.” He said and touched your face but you didn’t wake up. Ambulance 61 from Firehouse 51 rolled up 5 minutes later. When Gabby and Sylvie rolled up, they were shocked and scared for their friend. Hank and the others had shown up as well. Your breathing was sallow, so sallow that it looked like you weren’t breathing. You were covered in blood and there were blood streaks from where Jay had pulled you into safety.
“Gunshot wound to the right-side neck and abdomen. Passed out just 5 minutes ago.” Jay said to them and they nodded and loaded you on the gurney and into the ambulance. Jay looked at Antonio and shook his head and glared at him and headed to the hospital. Antonio felt guilty he didn’t want this to happen but yet it did and he couldn’t tell you sorry.
——————————————————————
When Antonio got to the hospital everyone else were in the hospital waiting room. Nobody was talking and he didn’t blame them. They waited for 3 hrs on an update and nothing new was said and that was worrying him. On the 4th hour Will came out and Hank was the first one up to him.
“She’s lost a lot blood but she’s doing ok.” Will said
“When will she be able to have visitors?” Hank asked
“She can have them now. I’ll take you up to her now.” Will said and they looked at Antonio and they nodded so he followed Will up to your room. “I’ll be back to check on her later. If she wakes up let us know.” Will said and Antonio nodded. Will left and he pulled up a chair beside your bed.
Antonio was able to look at you fully now. You were hooked up to wires and had gauze wrapped around her neck. He sat there listening to your heart monitor and it brought him relief that you were alive. He thought about the hell he had put you through in the past 2 months and he was truly regretting it now. You had yet to wake up and it was bothering him. When he saw you laying there bleeding out and Jay putting pressure on your wounds, it made him sick to his stomach. He should’ve been the one doing that instead he had turned the entire precinct against him for just hurting you.
Will and a few other nurses were in and out of the room as well as the other Intelligence members but Antonio never moved from his spot. Hank came in one time but stayed for a bit. You were like a daughter to him. “I know you’re together.” He said out of the blue one day and Antonio looked at him.
“How?” He asked
“It wasn’t hard to figure out.” Hank said
“I was trying to protect her from getting fired.” Antonio said
“I would never do that.” Hank told him.
“I really hurt her. I pulled away from her.” Antonio said to Hank and he nodded.
“Yes, you did. I suggest when she wakes up you make up with her and tell her why.” Hank said and Antonio nodded and then Hank left.
——————————————————————
4 days is how long it took you to wake up and when you did, you were in pain. You groaned in pain and that woke Antonio. He jumped up and went to you. “Babe, you’re ok.” He said and you looked at him.
“Why are you here?” You asked hoarsely and he was taken back.
“Because I love you and I’m sorry for hurting you over the past 2 months.” He confessed to you and you looked over at him.
“I don’t understand.” You said tried to talk again but it came out in a rasp.
“I didn’t want you to get in trouble or fired so I started to pull away from you. It hurt me do it to you. I’m truly sorry. I’m never going to do it again.” He said and you looked at him with a soft expression. You were going to talk again but he stopped you “Don’t try and talk. You were shot in the neck.” He said and you nodded but winced. “I love you Y/N. I’m never going to let you out my sight again.” He said and you smiled and motioned him forward and when he did you grabbed his face and kissed him. When you broke apart for air you both were smiling. “I’m gonna get Will.” He said and you nodded.
While he was gone you had time to think. He was truly sorry and wasn’t going to do it again. You had your Antonio back and that is all that mattered. However, he has 2 months of making up to do but you were ok with that. You loved him and he loved you.
Tag list:
@kmc1989
@els-marvelvsp
@atarmychick007
@nyx2021
@grandstrangerphantom
#antonio dawson x reader fanfiction#antonio dawson x reader fandom#antonio dawson x reader fic#antonio dawson x reader fanfic#antonio dawson x reader#antonio dawson imagine#antonio dawson fic#antonio dawson fandom#antonio dawson fanfic#antonio dawson fanfiction#antonio dawson imagines#chicago pd fanfic#chicago pd fandom#chicago pd imagine#chicago pd fic#chicago pd fanfiction#chicago pd x reader#one chicago imagines#one chicago fanfic#one chicago fanfiction#one chicago imagine#one chicago x reader
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ian mckinley (FD3) is autistic here's why
i orginally wrote this for twitter for autism awareness day but my friend said to post it on tumblr so . throws this to the masses no particular order im kinda just rambling . i have autism myself a lot of this will be relating to My personal exprience being autistic and why Ian sticks out to me and is a character I feel seen by :) -- Ian seems to have low empathy for others. Not that he doesn't care - he very much does and I will get to that too - but rather he struggles to relate to people on an emotional level prefering to use logic instead of emotion. Hell his first line in the movie is he alongside Erin trying to reassure Wendy that she'll be fine on the rollercoaster.
Though unlike Jason, their approach is more logic and reason based. Using facts and logic to communicate their point > saying something like "hey, it's okay to feel scared, but you'll be fine". And like many autistic people including myself who do this it's kinda regarded as him being rude/a smartass by those around him. When his intentions were entirely the opposite and he was actually just trying to be helpful.
Something personally I relate to a lot. I've been told countless times that I "don't need to be a smartass" when just trying to use logic to deflate a problem because, to me, it makes more sense than being emotional about it.
Ian trying to find logic in things is shown again in the scene where Wendy and Kevin come to warn he and Erin about death's design. Ian is completely opposed to the idea that death could possibly be a thinking or feeling entity. Again he isn't trying to be a smartass or be sassy about it, just trying to work out what the fuck Wendy and Kevin are on about because to him? It makes no logical sense.
He's very rooted in his beliefs and even when he choses to humour Wendy and Kevin he still takes a logical approach and tries to make sense of it in a way that makes sense to him. Even coming up with a solution that would seem most logical.
And yet again, he's treated like a bit of an asshole for it. It's not like he grabbed Wendy and shook her and told her to die no he just accepts this. He might have low empathy but he's still understanding.
Ian actually seems to care a lot about people. Especially Erin, who he's closest to in the movie, but this care extends even to Ashley and Ashlyn. Who he very likely wasn't friends with judging by how he and Erin laugh at them when they try to invite Wendy to the tanning salon.
But he cares, still, and has a very strong sense of justice. His interruption at the funeral is a prime example of this. You can see him dwelling on it for a moment before he speaks. He's not speaking up because he wants the attention, he's not trying to cause drama, he's just upset. Because to him, even as people who he wasn't close with, Ashley and Ashlyn's deaths were unfair and the fact that someone is trying to suggest otherwise just set him off.
If he was doing it for attention or to cause drama he would've put up more of a fight when Kevin and Lewis got him to leave. But he doesn't. He's probably pretty aware that what he did was wrong but the need to speak up outweighed that in the moment. Something again that I can relate to heavily. If something is unfair you will know about it. And people with autism often have strong senses of justice.
Ian also has very few people he's close with. Erin being his closest friend possibly even Only. Hence why her death impacted him as much as he did. He may not have been Wendy's best friend or anything but he did trust her and get along with her. So when Erin dies - a death that only occurs because Wendy interrupted his death causing it to skip to Erin - it feels like a betrayal. An injustice against someone he cared deeply about.
And that feeling of betrayal coupled with the fact Erin died so awfully is what drives him to act so irrationally.
His whole thing at the tricentennial was almost like a meltdown or at the very least an all-reason-out-the-window moment and god as someone who's autistic and frequently misunderstood by people / misunderstanding people leading to moments of severe anger and lashing out... i get it man i get you Ian.
Think. Erin died horribly less than 24 hours ago. It's fresh in his mind. He's focused so so heavily on Wendy being there, thinking about how unfair it is. Wondering "Why could Wendy save me but not Erin?". He's acting irrationally, he isn't thinking. Hell he sounds like he's on the verge of crying. And again I get it I GET that. When I feel something wrong has been done to me / someone I love I tend to fixate on that person and place blame onto them and act very irrationally about it.
Lastly I'm also 99% sure Ian never makes direct eye contact with anyone in this movie for longer than 5 seconds. So.
He's just a bit silly and him being autistic means a lot 2 me. end of thread . god hes just like me for real.
#autism awareness day#final destination#final destination 3#ian mckinley#ian final destination#literally THE autistic character#the autistic rep I needed#hes so silly#horror movies
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Spoiler warning for the webcomic Aurora
So I've had this theory for a while (since somewhere during early/mid Daybreak page releases) abt Erin's tattoos in relation to how he uses magic that was more of a headcanon than an actual theory, until in a reread I noticed smn. (Bear with me, it's a little long bc I tend to over-explain to avoid misunderstandings 🫠 and also I got excited)
So Erin usually touches his tattoos when using magic, right? Which can range from grabbing his arm to just with the fingertips for a second before casting.
This makes sense in the context of another theory I've seen going around- that I agree with so far- that Erin's tattoos are a sort of disability aid. That they're there to assist with something like malformed or incomplete magical links.
So it was strange to me when I noticed that Erin did the same thing when using Void magic. This isn't something that is applicable in the same way his tattoos are, as his void-connection is something done to him as opposed to something he was born with, and there doesn't seem to be any indication of disability in that particular aspect.
This makes sense from a characterization standpoint, since he's used to doing it and it makes sense he'd resort to that habit, especially for a type of magic he's never used before. But it got me thinking.
While we haven't seen many examples of mages using tattoos outside of Erin, it doesn't look like touching them is required for casting the same way he does. It's also interesting when you consider that we've seen rune tattoos on the forearm, wrists, and hands as opposed to a specific area. That, in combination with how it looks like magic links work, makes me think that the placement either doesn't play a role in how the tattoo channels magic OR that it does so differently depending on where. Adding to that, why would touching the tattoo be necessary when it's already there on the skin?
Furthermore, it's established (mainly here, also implied here and here) that Erin touching his tattoos is necessary for his spellcasting.
Now the detail that got me thinking about this while rereading: when the Void Dragon is possessing Erin, he doesn't touch the tattoos before casting. And while it's possible that he does and we just don't see it onscreen, it seems odd that throughout both sequences where VD is using Erin's magic, we don't see him do this, or even any indication of it. Which is interesting when you consider that he's directly influencing Erin's actions through his soul, and when casting, through his magic links.
Now, if the action of touching the tattoos is what enables Erin to do magic, how come VD can do it through the same channels without doing that?
My theory: it's not physically necessary for using magic, but mentally necessary. It's possible that Erin uses the action as a sort of grounding technique, which makes perfect sense if these are something that is directly linked to maintaining or stabilizing his magic. The tattoos make it possible, while the action of added contact while spellcasting makes it easier. It's something that he has associated with doing magic, and without it it takes longer or significantly more effort to make it work.
Any thoughts?
#as someone who uses grounding techniques for a lot of stuff this just makes sense to me#comic aurora#aurora comic#aurora#comicaurora#aurora webcomic#erin ruunaser#aurora erin#erin aurora#the void dragon#void dragon aurora#aurora void dragon#fan theory#comic aurora theory#aurora comic theory#disabled characters#actually disabled#fantasy disability#fictional disability
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why are ian and anthony so forgiving for the failure or underperforming shows pitched by cast than their own? remember how Ian had that movie review show which was shelved because it averaged 300-400k views, I know they said that it was because of the copyright but I'm sure that's not the only reason because there are other movie related podcasts, they could've just not shown the movie visuals as videos but instead as screenshots. Another example is their sketches, I know part of the reason for that might be anthony feeling under-confident about his comedy but what if the views and the pressure also contributed to that. Meanwhile, they are so welcoming to culinary crimes which is also another show that is doing alright but not a hit as they would like, but they support it. In bit city they have given the whole channel to the cast and erin and their vision of comedy but even that is not performing as well (none of them have broken a million views yet and the one closest features ianthony). I don't understand why they are so gentle with the cast/crew and some of their low vibrational ideas than their own. I know anthony is CCO, so he doesn't approve of their ideas but I hope he builds back his belief in himself too. I miss their comedy and their ideas being on the channel. I feel people didn't give enough props to Ian and Anthony as writers than they give to mid content.
I am not sure who posted the ask exactly but I think either @wazurenaide or @ianthoni had an ask talking about the possibility that maybe the sketches also stopped because Anthony wanted to take time off screen for his own reasons. That to me makes sense as to why they stopped their sketches, or maybe because they were costing more than they were returning, and took too much time to shoot for the amount of return they did get.
It's still disappointing to me that after a year they called it on the sketches as they were. I hope somehow they can come back but if I'm being 100% honest, I don't have high hopes.
I am curious why some shows get cut and others don't. I think the movie one was because of fears of copyright strikes but they could of re-worked it, honestly. Sort of done it like how the Try Guys do their Guilty Pleasures movie podcast.
#smosh#ian hecox#anthony padilla#culinary crimes#smosh pit#asked and answered#queue and i#lilac answers
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potential thunderclan pairings the erins could've used instead, because god damn, why do they keep making pairings related:
Stormcloud X anyone: seriously, he's an outsider, let him have kits instead
Mousewhisker X anyone: same with Storm, but honestly, idk if there's anyone in his age range
Sunbeam X Nightheart: not a popular choice, and tbh i don't rly want them to have kids, but at least not related
Shellfur X Fernstripe: would have been SO so good. Shellfur's even a tortie!
random thunderclan cat X suprise othe clan mate: Bayshine and Thriftear was already out of no where. why not just have it be one of them X some other rando clan cat instead. plus, if it was Thriftear, it would add an extra sad layer with Bristlefrost. you could maybe do the same thing with something like Bayshine X Needleclaw
tbh i'm not sure if there's any other not related options? maybe Twig and Fin, but they might be distantly. i just don't want them to have kids.
really ,they should've just skipped thunderclan this arc. have Moonpaw be a windclan baby or somthing lmao
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Anyway theories about what sort of action we might be seeing in the second half of Ch2 and in Ch3 (WARNING: LONG HYPERFIXATION RAMBLING UNDER THE CUT)
So, looks like so far there’s drama with the volcano god in the area, and that’s why there’s such a big storm. Kendal noticed this and seemed worried about it, and I’m betting next page he’s going to explain to Erin how exactly Rakhn is a problem. Right now Kendal doesn’t seem more worried than normal “there’s a problem” level of worried (I think he might be compartmentalizing that ominous Collector dream warning for later) but then again it’s Kendal so him seeming calm doesn’t really tell us the actual difficulty level of the encounter beyond “well it’s not bad enough to be a crisis right out the gate”.
As for the actual encounter itself, I think the current issue is that Rakhn might not like floof gang entering (that lava projectile looked extra targeted). Either way it was noteworthy enough to set off Kendal’s god sense so. This isn’t really anything we don’t already know
What I’m more curious about is where Dainix comes into this. See, there are many, many, MANY chekov’s guns pointing towards this arc putting him in particular through the torment nexus (on top of him generally having a bad time out on the ocean), and poor guy is really not doing good right now. Like in the last shot he was in, he was GLOWING??? Like what’s up with that? Could just be a nightmare, but I saw another guy in the comments theorize that the volcanic weather stuff is contributing to him not feeling good right now. That is a good theory but it doesn’t answer the question of why he’s so important in this arc.
The chill montage right before The Plot showed up conveniently showed where everyone is. The boys are still below deck, and they’ll have to notice that something is happening eventually. And I like the “the volcanic weather is making it worse” theory because it conveniently forces him to be involved and important (otherwise he’s just sort of out of commission and that doesn’t make sense) and makes it unpredictable what will happen with him.
Now, later on, I do think poor guy will end up in the ocean somehow. There’s many chekov’s guns related to how firefloof form interacts with water -it’s not hurt by water, but smothering him when he’s only partially on fire does seem to shut it down, and we also know that him drowning does cause it to activate. And, like come on, “good thing I’m never going down there”? Now you’re just ASKING for it. Maybe Kendal too since someone took the time to point out he doesn’t always need to breathe. Falst is the only person who we know can actually swim so he might jump in to save someone but maybe not.
Speaking of, what the hell is up with the mermaids? They showed up in one panel just kinda vibing. Are they going to try to help floof gang? Or are they a part of this fight? Mermaid pirates or sirens could make for an interesting foe, but I have a hard time seeing how that would make sense when the volcano god seems to be the main issue here. It might make more sense for them to be a chekov’s gun that’ll show up to save floof gang later.
Anyway all of this is to say I’m very excited to see what happens next and I can think of SEVERAL ways for wholesome shipping torment to occur along the way. As for toxic fan bait I guess we’ll just have to see what she means by that
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Erin Bow:
"I just read -- in the book SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO by Jess Hill -- about the incident in Stockholm for which Stockholm Syndrome is named, and I am royally pissed off on behalf of all women, buckle up.
So, in 1973 there was this bank robbery In Stockholm. Two gunmen took four bank clerks hostage. This doesn't happen much in Sweden, and the police response can most charitably be described as inept. They surrounded the bank and kept it under siege for six days.
The public was rapt. The police probably felt they couldn't back down.
They got off to a bang up start when they sent their psychiatrist Nils Bejerot and a teenaged kid THOUGHT was the gunman's younger brother into the bank to negotiate. The kid was not in fact the younger brother and he got shot. Nils got out, though. Put a pin in that.
One of the hostages was a woman named Kristin Enmark. She strategically got close to the gunman who seemed more sane and more stable, because she thought that getting his protection was the best bet for getting out of there.
Definitely she didn't want to leave their lives in the hands of the police. She tried to talk to our friend Nils on the phone -- he refused to talk to her.
From inside the bank she gave a radio interview: "[The police] are playing with our lives. And they don't even want to talk to me, who is the one who will die if anything happens."
She was terrified the police would storm the bank and she and the other hostages would be killed in the cross fire. She even called the Swedish Prime Minister, proposing a plan where she and another hostage would leave the besieged bank with the two robbers.
The prime minister refused to agree, saying they couldn't give in to the demands of criminals. He told her: "Well, Kristin, you can't get out of the bank. You will have to content yourself that you will have died at your post."
When the police finally did teargas the place, they captured the gunmen and paraded them up and down the street. Enmark had had quite enough of theatre that would have cast her as "dead hero" and now wanted her to be "dazed victim."
She refused to get into a stretcher, walking out of the bank instead. She was not visibly traumatized in what the public considered the appropriate way. And she was critical of the police, especially their psychiatrist, our boy Nils.
It was at that point that he made up a syndrome -- Norrmalmstorg Syndrome, for the part of the city, later Stockholm Syndrome -- on the spot, and diagnosed her with it without ever talking to her personally.
Jess Hill writes: Stockholm Syndrome is a myth invented to discredit women victims of violence, created by a psychiatrist with an obvious conflict of interest, whose first instinct was to silence the woman questioning his authority.
The worst of it is this made-up disorder has been used to discredit (mostly but not exclusively) women who live with protracted danger and make strategic decisions about how and whether to resist.
In domestic abuse (a term author Hill prefers to domestic violence), Stockholm Syndrome is a tool for keeping the focus on the victim (“why didn’t she leave”) and not the perpetrator, or the system."
Links to the thread and related article below:
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🌈 2023 ✨
Another year is over so it's time for a look back at what was happening on this blog! I haven't really been around, it was just my queue, and maybe that's one reason why I looked at my archive and went "huh" at everything. I don't remember much. The other reason why this year probably went poof in my head is because I was dealing with some mental health stuff lol. I say lol but it wasn't actually very lol but I'm doing better now and 2024...is looking promising for now.
So, let's talk more under the cut, shall we?
January
We're in Bridgeport and Sawyer is living his best life. You know, girlfriends, boyfriends, being turned into a vampire, giving birth to three little vampires, threatening to sell his enemies' organs on the black market...best life indeed.
February
Okay I am now seeing that "talking more" about every month will be impossible since I actually don't have much recollection of 2023 lmao
March
Sawyer and Erin are at the best point of their relationship, but we left them alone for a bit and went back to NSB. Pastel just moved to Strangerville and got a...rather strange roommate.
April
The rather strange roommate becomes Pastel's rather strange wife. I love these two so much. We also say hello to Moss -- and also to Ross, who returns from...god knows where. I mean yeah, there was the ts3 Ross, but technically they're two different people. Parallel universes and stuff.
May
Thea is born and strange wife Jesse gets even stranger. That whole "merging with the mother plant" thing was kinda weird but I really enjoyed it. Idk what I was on but it was fun. And then, before returning to the lepacy, I posted my Cottage Living screenshots! ...which were really just me going "uwu what does this do" on every possible Wicked Whims option.
June
...and I went from posting weird WW Ross stuff to posting wholesome Growing Together Ross stuff. If that gave you a whiplash, I am sorry, but imagine what it must be like for me. I'm locked with this guy in my head 24/7. He's the whiplash king. A blorbo to you, a curse to me. A beloved curse tho. Ok I'm getting weird. Back to the lepacy.
July
Lepacy time! Loved the soap opera Generations gen. Kinda wish I had sticked to some of the storylines instead of going "eh nvm I just wanna play". I'm not saying I regret not actually letting Saywer go on a killing spree but also...imagine if he went on a killing spree. You don't see that in lepacies often do ya
August
August was...welp 💀 I was at the grippy socks hospital for most of that month, 10/10 would recommend, but my queue ran out while I was there so I just reblogged some old stuff for a few weeks.
September
September is just lepacy month. Cornelia and Archer are happy, they get married, they get more children...yeah. Good wholesome Generations times all around. It's not like they're gonna get divorced later or anything.
October
The twins are kind of chaotic, one of them turns into a ghost, both then bring their cursed imaginary friends to life...and the final child of Archer and Cornelia is born.
November
I loved running into Sawyer at the grocery store all the time. Weird vampire alleged killer grandpa behavior suits him. Dorothea goes away to a boarding school, hates it there and instantly comes back. Relatable. Oh and midlife crisis hits Archer hard.
December
And we're in December! Dorothea enters her horsegirl era and finds herself a girlfriend...and we'll continue that in 2024!
What's in store for the new year besides the lepacy? Well, Not So Berry will be making a return (and HOPEFULLY we'll finally get to the end. we need to). There's a story I want to do in the NSB universe, if you know you know. Before we dive into the next lepacy generation, I'm thinking of another BC with the gen 7 heir...oh and Marika's Black Widow. Shoot and I'm starting an irl job in January. Yeah no we're not doing all this in 2024, don't count on it 💀 But I'll try.
Happy New Year! 🎇
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MARK ESSAY! BIGASS MARK POST!!!
A lot of y’all already know I love Mark. Bro isn’t even my favourite SMG character but he’s also currently the one I feel the strongest about simply because I don’t see anyone else literally anywhere willing to defend him. Emily and Emma don’t need me rn y’all they have fandoms but THIS is a job for ur girl only it seems (woop woop) so I wrote this essay about why he deserves more recognition and less hate from the fans. I can’t promise it’s very well written bc I wrote it from like 2-4am and I haven’t exactly proofread but whateverrr.
LONG FUCKING POST AHEAD
A common thing I ALWAYS see from Mark haters is that he’s “boring” or “dull” compared to the others. While it’s true that his personality isn’t quite as distinct or individual as the other four, is that not… literally one of the aspects of his character? That he follows what the people around him do rather than voicing his own thoughts and opinions? It’s literally a part of his character so I don’t see the issue with him usually just falling behind Charlie or Kate for example, because it makes sense to me that he’d do that.
People often argue that he’s “too nice” and doesn’t have enough flaws. Why is that an issue when it comes to Mark when the same could be said about characters like Salim or Sam who are infinitely more loved? I also really like Sam and Salim but for the sake of this argument I’ll point out a few flaws in the fact that people seem to think they’re significantly more interesting than Mark. You can argue that it’s because of Salim’s arc with Jason, but that’s the arc more than the character himself. Really Salim doesn’t have any real flaws at all and isn’t all that deep of a character, as likeable as he is. And people have said it’s because of his action scenes, but I’ll get to that point about Mark later. With Sam, similar things can be said. Point mainly is, the idea that Mark is boring because he’s “too nice and lacks flaws” doesn’t really make sense if you’re not consistent with it when it comes to other characters too.
Something that @108garys pointed out that I agree sm with is that a lot of people tend to ignore the relatability of his character. I feel like I can especially talk about this one as Mark is one of the SMG characters I relate to most, possibly even more than Brad. With characters like Kate or Erin, it’s easy to relate to them because of their anxieties, and you see a lot more people admitting to relating to that where you don’t with Mark. He relies on other peoples opinions rather than his own, doesn’t like making decisions and can end up passing up opportunities that are better for him because of it. You can see in his interactions with usually Kate or Charlie that if they disagree with him about something, it doesn’t take much for him to step back and agree with them because that’s just how he is. I don’t know about other people but I find all that to be extremely relatable so I wanted to point that out as probably one of the reasons I ended up so attached to him in the first place.
Another think I see him hated for is because of his plot armour. Now this would be fair coming from someone who just hates all forms of plot armour but I see a loooot of inconsistency with this one. Out of all SMG characters with plot armour, Mark’s is a rare case that actually makes sense in the plot. Du’met had specifically selected Mark to be the next ferryman, of course he wasn’t going to kill him. I’m going to use Mike from UD as a comparison but a lot of this can apply to the other plot armour characters too. If you want actual plot armour, Mike is a perfect example. Where through TDIM, Mark isn’t actually in danger of death in most of his scenes (The only exception is when he and Charlie are crossing over that beam, in that case I definitely think he should have been able to die there but this is aside from that) Mike is put in dangerous situations where he can’t die SOLELY because of plot armour. Du’met isn’t trying to kill Mark, he’s trying to contain him which he does in fact do if he captures him. The Ws in UD are actively trying to kill Mike and yet never actually do, for no plot related reasons at all, just because the game doesn’t want Mike to die yet. Another thing that’s different about these two cases is what happens when both characters lose their plot armour during the respective climaxes. In the climax of UD, Mike has ONE singular death and that’s it. Once he can die, he can only do so in one way. With Mark, he has the most death opportunities in the climax out of anyone. Du’met targets him during the entire fight. By default, Charlie and Erin have single QTEs to survive the end, Jamie has one choice, and Kate (Or Jamie/Erin if they’re the second to last instead of her) can only die if Mark is killed. Once Du’met is pinning Mark over the axe, it literally takes one fuck up to get him killed from that point on. I know I used Mike for this argument but similar things can be said about others like Jason, Salim and Nick. Mark is one of the only characters whos plot armour makes sense and yet I see his get shit on far more than any of the other examples when so many of those are worse.
(This part is a bit more of a ramble about his role in the story and relation to Du’met than anything. Bear with.) Anyway another point I need to point out is that people really have no business acting like Mark is somehow unimportant when he literally has the most personal conflict with the antagonist?? So for starters, Mark was specifically targeted by Du’met, and I’d argue has the most personal conflict with the guy. He was the only one that ever could have worked for ultimatum (It would have to be a man making the call, and Charlie doesn’t really care enough about any of the others for it to work with him.) So he’s at the centre of Du’met’s entire game, and I’ve always felt that the fight on the boat feels kinda personal for this reason, because Du’met would honestly have such a hatred for him by that point now that I think about it. Du’met had this entire plan that he thought would go smoothly and time and time again Mark actively fucks it up for him. He breaks through Kate’s window in breathless, and right after that in workshop he ends up avoiding the cage he was supposed to fall into. After that he’s the first to escape the hotel, and next time he runs into Du’met they fight. By this point, sure Du’met is still not trying to kill Mark, but he chooses to attack Mark when he could easily just chloroform him as usual. Something about the way he fights Mark here makes me think he probably had a personal hatred of him at this point. Assuming qtes are failed, he’s out here stomping on the guy, hitting him with an axe handle, literally picking him up and throwing him and kicking him in the ribs while he’s down. And we know he’s not trying to actually kill him here so that whole thing screams anger or frustration more than anything. Then on the boat later, he targets Mark the entire time. (plus the way he deliberately shows Mark, and Mark only, his face definitely makes it feel more personal imo) He’ll spend half the fight trying to shove Mark into an axe, the whole time just swiping off Kate/Jamie/Erin when they try to save him. And out of everyone, Mark is the only one who can directly kill Du’met. (at least until he’s revived) Also this is just the boat ending. Ultimatum is a whole new thing. He literally is forced to work for Du’met to continue the cycle. So when a character has this obvious (to me at least) of a personal conflict with the main antagonist, you’d think the fandom would do more with that, since they seem to do it with other characters, but then I remembered it’s Mark and nobody thinks about Mark </3
(This entire thing I realise can be used as Du’mark propaganda. It’s not exactly what I was going for with it but fuck it, it is because it was things like this that made me point out the ignored potential of that dynamic in the first place. You can’t tell me people wouldn’t go wild if things like this happened with like… anyone else.)
So I find it weird that people seem to not really do anything with any of this? For example, ultimatum is such a horribly amazing concept, and it specifically involves Mark at the centre of it, and yet on the rare occasion I’ve found an ultimatum fic, it never involves Mark. I’m being so fr rn, until 108garys posted their recent ultimatum fic I’d never seen an ultimatum fic with Mark. Lemme repeat that there were ultimatum fics, but no ultimatum fics with Mark. How tf r u gonna have an ULTIMATUM fic and exclude the ultimatum guy???? There’s also people who think he didn’t adopt Connieeee guys wtfff literally whooo else can he have one thing omg omggggg😭😭
Sorry got a bit unhinged there at the end but look whos living up to the name <3 anyway yeah as Mark’s no.1 fan😍 this post was always gonna happen. I jus think he deserves a lil bit more credit yk??? 🥱
Anyway gonna tag @queerkearney in this bc the whole idea came from our chats I love our chats <3
#the devil in me#mark nestor#Du'mark#theres that one part that kinda makes this count as propaganda so fuck it i'm shoving that tag in
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Someone recently asked me why I enjoyed Final Destination 3 so much, and I accidentally wrote a mini-analysis so here you guys go. (I didn’t proofread it so I hope it makes sense)
Well, where do I even start. First off, the characters are extremely well written and easy to connect with, unlike any of the other movies (besides the first one).
The acting is absolutely phenomenal and the pure fear Mary Elizabeth Winstead (Wendy) managed to portray is actually mind boggling. I will admit Lewis (Texas Battle) was poorly written, being a stereotypical black jock never really plays well. But the other characters have their own uniqueness to them that we didn’t really see in some of the other movies. Ashlyn (Crystal Lowe) and Ashley (Chelan Simmons) were stereotypical “mean” girls but they were actually extremely nice and sweet in the movies, just girls who were kinda airheaded. Frankie (Sam Easton) was a weird ass pervert, but you have to admit his character was extremely (and sadly) realistic. Ian (Kris Lemche) and Erin (Alexz Johnson) were teenage dirtbag assholes which really balances out the ditzyness and almost airy feel of the other characters. Ian being super smart was honestly a refresher in the series, because not many people did try and apply other “laws” and “theories” to the equation. Julie (Amanda Crew) was that asshole teen little sister who acts like a brat but truly isn’t, which (if you’re a sibling) is so easy to relate and connect to. Kevin (Ryan Merriman) was a jerk in the beginning, but as the story went on you could kind of see him change and feel for him and his situation (at least I did. I know not many people can, but that’s cause of trauma for me…) And the little screen time we had for Jason (Jesse Moss) and Carrie (Gina Holden) made viewers feel torn about their death. With the 10 minutes they had, they were SUCH sweethearts and it breaks your heart to see them die like that especially knowing Wendy tried to get them off.
The plot itself is amazing, a control freak who now has the knowledge she isn’t even in control of her own life and death, as well as trying to stop everyone around hers demise. It adds a more realistic level to this that wasn’t portrayed in the others. She wants to be in control, but she can’t because that’s not the way death works. The clues being in the photos rather than in visions is genuinely so cool, although it was a bit of a reach at times. I found that it being a group of people who already know each other rather than strangers really drives the message further and makes the audience have a deeper reaction to the movie. The deaths itself were the best in any movie by far, and there’s no arguing on that. The tanning beds, the weights, the nail gun, the flag pole impalement, even the premonition Wendy had at the end that maybe (probably definitely) did happen with the train. Each death in this movie was beautiful, and the editing and everything about this movie is just gorgeous.
I think what worked for it was the fact it’s. Stand-alone, and not a continuation of the first two movies. Also, they had a lot more cool features than the other movies, like that whole “choose their fate” thing in the DVDs (I think). This movie is straight up just fun and a refresher from the others. The only movie I would consider being better than it is the 5th one, but that’s simply cause of the plot twist at the end and the cool thing they added with the “take a life, earn a life”
Anyways I hope this makes sense please tell me it does 😭
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