#why tf have we been studying this for so long

[valentina-writes]

The Distance He Keeps - Part 2

Azriel x Reader

summary: Finally, you confront Azriel about why he is avoiding you. Later, you find yourself inside his mind, revealing a deep secret about your relationship (I'm really bad at summaries, it's been so long ugh)

warnings: drinking, slight hurt/no comfort, suicidal thoughts if you squint, swearing

word count: 3.4k | part 1 | part 3 | masterlist

A/N: I'm honestly so incredibly happy that so many of you liked the first part! Now, I love men who have the ability to just shut tf up, but Az brings this to a whole other level. So... uhm prepare for some frustration. I promise, he's not an asshole, just incredibly tortured. Anyways, I hope you like it and come back soon for part 3! xx

There was something drawing me towards the roof. A silent calling, a sixth sense attuned to him. Like the air was vibrating softly, showing me his direction. It had been a week since the dinner, since I had last seen him. But still, I was sure that this was new. Maybe I was going insane. It wouldn't surprise me.

I stepped outside onto the small roof terrace. It was near midnight, the sky above Night Court seemingly endless. Millions of stars twinkled down on me; I would never quite get used to the beauty of the nights here. A cool summer breeze hit me and the humming of Velaris reached my ears, the sounds of countless people moving through the streets. But I hardly noticed any of that.

Because there, sitting on one of the two chairs that barely fit on the tiny terrace, was Azriel. His shoulders were tense, his wings half unfolded as if he was about to lurch out of his seat and into the night. His shadows stayed close to him, as if they were trying to guard him. Aloofness was not rare to him, but vigilance like this, I had never seen on him at home.

How do I start? I asked myself. What do I even say? ‘Hey, you’ve been ignoring me and I miss you and I’m in love with you, please come back and stop this bullshit’? How pathetic. I had no plan. The past nights, I had tossed and turned in my bed, imagining our encounter. The only conclusion I had come to was that whatever I’d say, it couldn’t possibly get any worse. Hopefully.

"Don't mind me, I'm leaving in a second", he spoke out, still not turning around. His posture stayed rigid. There was no other indication of him noticing your presence.

Without thinking, I countered: "Oh, so now you're speaking again?". Azriel’s neck tensed. That came out a little meaner than anticipated.

He sighed. "Maybe".

I took the few steps to the other chair and slid into it. Hesitantly, I turned my head towards him. He still wouldn't meet my eyes. Azriel looked tired, his eyes half closed with bags underneath them. His long fingers were clenched around the armrests of his chair. It was evident that he was severely unwell. How long had this been going on for? Maybe I should have pressed harder when he started ignoring me, I realized, and not folded in on myself.

For a while, we sat in silence while I studied him. Then I couldn't bear it anymore. I swallowed the anxiety that had welled up inside me for weeks, tried to calm my flaying nerves. "What is going on, Az, are you okay? Please, we can talk about whatever happened. I miss you”, I pleaded, the last words only a whisper. I quickly shut my mouth before more words could escape my lips. Come back, I thought, come back to me.

The muscles in his jaw tensed and he dropped his head into his hands. "Don't say that. Don't make it harder than it already is".

Desperation grew inside of me. Even if he did not love me back, I would not bury our friendship without at least putting up a fight. “We can work it out. Whatever it is, we can face it together”.

His face twisted in a pained expression. “Cauldron boil me, I wish it were that easy”

"Is this about starfall?", I asked. Finally, our gazes met. Azriel looked defeated. "So it is?". He didn't deny it, so I assumed I was correct. "You're embarrassed at what happend, or what? Do you want to take back what you did and said? Is it because you're scared?". The shadows drew in closer around him, pooling around his chest and neck, as if to guard him.

His voice was agonized when he replied: "You don't understand. You just don't understand and I can't even be mad at you. But I can't be around you like this". Azriel had always been a man of few words, but frustration hit you hard. Why couldn't he give you at least some insight? "Then fucking explain it to me, Az! I can't take this anymore."

There was no hesitation in his voice this time. "Maybe I shouldn't have kissed you."

This felt like a blow to my stomach. All air was knocked right out of me. This day was the happiest I had been in years. I thought about it before falling asleep, in the bathtub and over breakfast. Again and again, I replayed this moment to make sure I hadn't made it up, to hold onto it. And now he was destroying it, crushing it, with a single sentence. Tears welled up in my eyes and I fought to not let them roll.

I hated myself for the crack of my voice, when I asked: "Was it that horrible? Did I disgust you much that you can't even look at me anymore?". Even if he didn't love me -

"Don't you ever think about yourself like that", he practically growled, "you, out of all people, have no business believing that". He was angry now, as if he couldn't even understand how I could think that. His words confused me. One second he said he shouldn't have kissed me and now this?

"Then what is it, Az? What happened to 'I will always find you'? Talk to me please. Make me understand", I begged. My hand reached out to thread through his fingers, but he escaped my grasp, stood up and leaned against the terrace fence.

There was a long pause. I almost thought he wouldn't answer. Then, quietly, almost desparately: "Can't you feel it?"

What did he mean? Why did he always have to be so cryptic? "I feel that you're drifting away from me and I can't get ahold of you. LIke I'm reaching out and begging and with every try, you float further away".

His hands gripped the banister so tightly his knuckles turned white and a sad smile crossed his face. "That's how I feel about you as well."

"What did I do wrong? Please. I'm right here, you're not losing me". I would plead on my knees before letting go. There was nothing I wouldn't do to get him back. Even if he regretted the kiss, I would not lose my best friend. My better half.

When he glanced back at me, the look in his eyes broke me. The spark in them was gone, the glint I had come to love dimmed. "You didn't do anything wrong. It's not your fault". The sadness seeped out of him, his shadows now concealing almost every part of him, except for his face. I had never seen him like this. "Please, give me some space. I - I'll tell you. Just this once, please". Without waiting for my answer, he jumped over the low fencing around the rooftop terrace and flew into the night. And left me alone with my thoughts. Only then did my tears start to run.

How did it go?

Fuck off, Rhysand

I woke up in the middle of the night, my throat dry, my heart hammering.

"Well, what the fuck am I supposed to do?"

The words that left my mouth weren't my own. Neither was my voice. What was going on? I still felt half asleep.

"I thought Y/N would figure it out herself. It was so painfully obvious in her memories, but she just didn't connect the dots. Pretty ironic considering her job". I couldn't focus on my surroundings, still only half conscious. All I could register were the big violet eyes staring at me.

Anger flared up at the other person's words, but it wasn't mine. I could feel it, but it was somehow...foreign. Rhys was talking to me, I realized. But it wasn't me, really. The body I was in was taller, the angle I saw everything from was wrong. And the hands that were brought up to sweep the stray hairs out of my eyes were tan, scarred and surrounded by shadows. I was inside Azriel's mind. Suddenly, I was wide awake. Why was I here? How did I even get into this situation?

"What was she thinking about?", Azriel asked. Rhysand gave me - no - Azriel a long look. Azriel was back at the townhouse and they were speaking about my previous talk with Rhys, it seemed. Curiosity took over the confusion within me. I longed to know what Azriel would say about me. Would he tell Rhys the reason for his behavior?

"I think you know. I'm not telling you. She screamed bloody murder at me that I had violated her thoughts like that". Disappointment lapped at me from within him. But there was something else entirely, too. Affection. Concern.

There was a long pause. Azriel started pacing the room. "You could make her some food", Rhys offered, "That should clear it up. Apart from the rather obvious method". Az' wings rustled behind him. He was uncomfortable. Blurry images of our entwined bodies came into his mind. They came and went fast, he quickly shoved each one away behind thick barriers. What did that mean?

"I'm not going to force her like that. She should decide for herself. And the "obvious method" as you called it, is not really an option to me right now". An image of me, naked in his bed blazed through his mental shields. By the Mother, what were they talking about? He breathed in deeply and vanished this product of his imagination. I grew restless. Why was he thinking about me like this, when only a few hours ago he had made very clear that he didn't even want to think about the kiss? Did he lie to me?

Azriel started pacing. His mind was racing. Shards of conversations with me came flying from his thoughts into my own. Dozens of made-up scenarios of him iniciating conversations that ended with me rejecting him. Which was weird, because why would I-

Rhy interrupted my - our thoughts: "Can you feel her? As her mate you should be able to have some insight into her mind".

All thoughts left my mind. Mate mate mate mate mate mate mate echoed through me. Azriel was my mate. My whole worldview shifted as I thought about our last conversation. Why didn't he just tell me? Somewhere far away from here I felt the blood rushing through my veins, my heart hammering against my ribcage. Mate.

"Not really, so far. Every now and then I can feel something, but hearing her thoughts or even seeing them... that only happened once". I longed to see what he had seen, but he had regained his composure. There was nothing slipping past his wards. A million questions raced through my head. Why couldn't I feel the bond? And since when did he know about this?

"Can I have a look? Maybe I can feel around and find out what the problem is", Rhys offered.

I felt him before I could withdraw from Azriel's mind. I didn't even know how to withdraw. Where was the path back to myself? Where did Azriel end and I begin? How had I even ended up here? I didn't know.

Soft claws stroked my consciousness - no, Azriel's. It felt nearly the same. Rhys dived into Azriel's brain, pulling me down into his thoughts with him, and sifted through memories, feelings, everything Az would let him see. Big parts of his brain were walled in, impenetrable.

Something here is different. He carefully dove through Az' brain and before I knew it, his invisible claws were stroking at my own walls. Interesting. Until he found what he was looking for. A tiny, softly glowing, thread, bound tightly to my thoughts, winding straight into the heart of Azriel's sectioned-off memories.

Go back, and for Cauldron's sake, talk to him, Rhys purred at me.

Azriel POV

I would never get used to the feeling of my brother combing through my brain, even after over 600 years. He was gentle and respected the heavy wards I had built over time, protecting my most vulnerable memories. The size of the walled-in part had grown considerably over the past years. But he was kind enough not to comment on that. Rhys moved along the outskirts of my brain until I could barely feel him anymore. But he was still there, somewhere. Somewhere... foreign. At the edges of my consciousness, a claw hit heavy walls. Walls that weren't my own. And then: a claw lightly stroking a thread that was welded to the essence of my being. A mating bond. Thin and fickle, not yet accepted. But it was there. And that meant that on the other side, behind thick walls... was her.

"Did you feel that?", Rhys asked after he withdrew from my mind. My shadows swirled around me, as if they had sensed something as well. They seemed elated, tugging at my hands and wings to get me moving.

"Yes", I breathed out, "thank you ". The smallest spark of hope ignited within me. I quickly shut it down. If it hadn't snapped for her yet, who was to say it ever would?

"The bond is most definitely not one-sided", Rhys explained, "I could feel her on the other side, but it has not fully snapped. Maybe because you've known each other for so long. What happened after you kissed at starfall? Maybe it takes a little more... closure.", he winked, sporting a wicked grin.

A low growl escaped my lips. He had no business thinking about my mate like this. She was my mate. Mine. The half-finished bond inside me flared up at his words, roaring with anger over his insinuation. If he ever so much as thought of her like this again, I would-

"Easy, man. Remind me to grant you a long vacation after you mate fully. You’re in desperate need of a good fuck". I breathed in deeply, trying not to tackle him to the ground.

It took all of my willpower to stay calm. "Can I stay here tonight?". There was no way I could sleep next door to her tonight.

"Always".

I left him there, went to the room I sometimes shared with Cassian and dropped onto my bed. As I stared at the dark ceiling, my thoughts circled back to another night.

I was drunk off her. She was beautiful everyday, I could barely take my eyes off her when she wore pajamas at breakfast. But today was a wholly different calibre. The dress she was wearing perfectly accentuated her eyes, and the glitter in her hair made her sparkle like she was a star herself.

"I will find you, no matter where. I promise". The words left my lips before I could think them through. She was too close to me. I had one glass of wine too much. Or maybe I was just sick of pretending.

"And I will find you", she replied. Her lips were slightly opened, the look in her eyes so vulnerable. A mirror of my own feelings. My shadows tugged at my suit's lapels, their whispers in my ears were delighted. This was it, the moment I had been waiting on forever.

Without my doing, my wings unfolded around her, shielding us off from the world around us. A breath later we were outside on a vacant balcony.

My ringed fingers shook slightly as I brought them up to her cheeks, cradling her face. Starlight reflected in her beautiful eyes and I wished I could drown in them. Her hands drew me in closer, her eyes closed. "Az - I...", she whispered.

Before I knew it, my lips touched hers. They were velvet on mine. Her hands threaded into the hair at the nape of my neck and she arched upwards. The only thought on my mind was her name, repeating like a prayer, while my lips moved softly on hers. Slowly, savoring every second, I parted her lips with my tongue. The moment our tongues touched, it was like a spark had been ignited inside me. A white hot feeling rushed through my veins and reflexively I moaned into her and pulled her closer. It was like a supernova inside me. Like something that had been missing from me my entire life was crafted with enormous force. And then I felt her. Her desire and wanting crashed down on me, amplified my own. My mate.

My knees threatened to buckle and the shadows swirled around her in ecstasy, threading through her hair, touching her arms and face.

And then the kiss ended and reality came crushing down on me with a force that knocked the wind out of my lungs.

She looked happy. Nothing more. There was no sign that she felt what I felt. No recognition that the Cauldron hat just welded our souls together, fused our entire beings into one. All my hopes shattered. My insides turned to ice and for a split second I wished I were dead.

Internally, I tried to reach out to her and tug at the string binding us together. But it was too thin, too unstable. There was no way for me to get ahold of it. Everytime I reached for it, it slipped from my grasp. I drew her into a hug to keep from breaking apart. But it was of no use. My hands started shaking against her back and my breath caught in my throat. I needed to go.

I pressed a kiss onto her forehead, before I withdrew from her embrace. Mumbling an excuse I barely registered, I forced myself to turn around and leave. With every step I took, I could feel my soul shattering into more and more pieces. In my room, I ripped my suit jacket off and threw it in a corner, didn't even bother to unbutton my shirt and instead tore it in two and threw it right after the jacket. I could still taste and feel her on my lips. In hopes of ridding myself of it, I tried to wipe her off of them. My hands came back red with lipstick.

The bond, still fresh, pulsed inside me and I felt her everywhere. Hell, I saw her in her mirror, through her own eyes, pulling off her dress and getting ready for bed, only a door away. I felt how tired she was, how happy she was. How fucking unaware she was that she was now the center of my world.

My shadows escaped from me, slithered underneath the door. They were agitated, longing for her as much as I was. Now, I felt how they pooled against her door, begging to be let in. I had just enough power over them to stop them from rushing into her room.

There was only one thing that would help now. I dug through my dresser. Mindlessly, I threw everything in my way into a pile on the floor. Until I found what I was looking for. A sinfully expensive bottle of very strong alcohol Cass had gifted me for solstice. Without thinking, I uncorked the flask with my teeth and drank until I gasped for air. And then I drank again. Anything to dull the ache inside me. The ache for her. Until I wouldn’t care anymore.

What a fucking mess. She was one of the few truly good things in my life and now that had been stolen from me too. Sometimes I felt like my life was one big single joke. No matter what, I never got what I wanted. I longed and pleaded and burned, but not once had life been playing fair with me. Maybe that was my curse. To give and give and never get anything in return.

Somewhere in the back of my mind, I could hear the voice of my father, long gone. Did you really think you deserved her? You are nothing, boy. And I knew he was right. How blind I was to believe that I was good enough for her. How fucking naïve.

There was nothing I could do. The bond ached inside me, mocking me for my delusions. I laid down and hoped the world would go away.

series taglist: @tele86 @francesababyd0ll @rcarbo1 @willowpains @i-am--infinite @paintedbyshadows @mellowmusings @ashduv

[cynical-ghost]

kimi antonelli x half sister verstappen!reader fc (ugh_liza) where shes a super private person (her social media is too) and their relationship is private but not secret and shes studying to be a fashion journalist and people on social media love them together but some people are jealous and hate on them smau please :))

FASHION JUNKY

Paring: Kimi Antonelli x FashionJournalist!Verstappen!reader

Genre: smau- social media

Warning(s): use of Yn, hate, foul language

Synopsis: Yn Verstappen and Kimi have been dating since they were 16, there isn’t much information about them except that Yn is studying about fashion journalism. Most of the fans love them and can’t wait for Yn to be a F1 Wag but there are a few jealous bafoons that can’t keep there hands off their keyboards.

A/n thank you nonnie! I love this request 🫶 sorry it’s taken so long for me to upload this, I’m no longer bedrotting and have recently touched some grass :)

YnVforeal

Liked by Kimi_antonelli, Maxverstappen1, OllieBearman and 2,547,639 others

YnVforeal spending a little time with this one before going back to my first love 🫶❤️

Kimiantonelli okay first, wow (you are stunning) and two Wowww (I thought I was your first love🥲)

YnVforeal one thank you Schat and two you are my first Human love, clothes will always have a space in my heart right next to you ❤️

Kimiantonelli awww Tesoro that’s the sweetest thing you have ever said to me 🤭😘

Maxverstappen1 why do you have to post stuff like this? I already get enough of your sickening romance irl 🙄

YnVforeal @/Kelly_Piquet come get your mans

Kelly_Piquet Max stop tormenting your sister and her boyfriend, they are the sweetest!!

Maxverstappen1 sorry Mijn liefje❤️(my love)

Maxverstappen1 @/ynforeal teef (bitch)

YnVforeal 🥱

User25 the way she just admitted to cheating? Did anyone else catch that?!?!

User15 I saw that too!!

User12 what a slut 🙄

YnxKimiii You clearly didn’t catch anything, it appears it went right over your little head! Also if you scroll down slightly (if you didn’t catch the sarcasm in the first place) you would see she was talking about her love for fashion.

Kimyn2425 I could not have said it better!! Ps love the username!!!

Ynxkimiii thank you 🫶

User20 were they silent?

User21 or were they silenced?

Kimiantonelli

Liked by YnVforeal, OllieBearman, arthur_leclerc and 5,237,836 others

Kimiantonelli Amore mio❤️

YnVforeal Mijn liefje🥰

Kimiantonelli 😘

User42 YN AND KIMI CONTENT!! I REPEAT YN AND KIMI CONTENTT 📢📢📢

Ynxkimiii they are just the cutest omfg!

Kimyn2425 I��ll go sleep on the motorway 😭

User27 look at her sitting there like she’s better than everyone🙄 it makes me sick just looking at her

User10 tf are you talking about?

OllieBearman you guys love each other

YnVforeal indeed we do🧐

Kimiantonelli were you going to add to that?

OllieBearman I wanted to say something but nothing came to mind so I went with that 😭😭

User10 Ollie not knowing what to say to his friends who clearly love each other so he states the obvious 😂😭

YnVforeal he’s a little dumb but we still love him

User10 OMFG YN YN I CANT BELIVE TOU FUCKJNG REPLY JEHDJANSBD-

YnVforeal

Liked by Kimiantonelli, Maxverstappen1, ynxkimiii and 2,349,126 others

YnVforeal Back to business 📜👗

Kimiantonelli have fun my darling😘

YnVforeal I will my love ❤️❤️

Kimyn2425 the way that Kimi is always first to like and comment is what I strive for 😭

User11 same girl same

User10 I got it girls, my bf does it al the time 🫣

User5 YOU WON !!!

User25 good, you are so lazy!

User62 ikr like wtf does she even do other than be a full time gold digger 😂

User11 umm, 1 she is literally YN Verstappen (hellooo) she grew up with money so she is def not a gold digger and 2 she is a fashion journalist in training, she is literally getting invited to massive fashion brands fashion shows!!!

YnVforeal posted a story

Maxverstappen1

Liked by Ynforeal, Kimiantonelli, Charles_Leclerc and 1,362,846 others

Maxverstappen1 These two stole the show 🙄

YnVforeal we’re just better 😉

Maxverstappen1 you sure about that?

YnVforeal Kimi wants to reply but is too scared to

Maxverstappen1 🤨

Kimiantonelli just wanted to say you are the best and I’m a big fan of your work sir

Maxverstappen1 as you told me multiple times when you and my baby sister started dating

YnVforeal you guys are so annoying, you know you love each other

Maxverstappen1 maybe

Kimiantonelli @/ynforeal HE SAID MAYBE OMFG!!!! HE LIEKS ME!!!!

YnVforeal girl, your still in the comments

Kimiantonelli oh

Maxverstappen1 🧐

[bitethedevil]

The Science of Why Raphael Won’t Get Tf Out of My Head

It’s your local doctor in cambion physiology here. I’m going to take you through my theory about why Raphael is stuck in our heads. It’s all based on Science™, of course. Some of these carefully studied theories are dependent on the fact that you are the owner of a uterus. If you aren’t, then idk. I can’t help you. You’re a medical anomaly. It’ll all make sense in a moment, don’t worry about it.

There are a couple of things that I believe are necessary for prolonged focus on a specific character (Source: The Devil, Bite. 2024: Pulled it out of my ass):

Attraction: It helps if said character is hot.

Versatility: I’ll explain later.

A feeling of being able to relate to said character

Attraction

There’s this theory about how women’s attraction to men changes in accordance with their menstrual cycles (source and source). Basically the study says that when a woman is at her most fertile, she prefers more traditionally masculine looking men. However, the rest of her cycle she might prefer men who lean more towards the feminine (both in general qualities and physical attributes).

The whole point of this, is that at ones most fertile, it’s full on monkey brain genetics going “he looks strong and male, so he’ll make good offspring”, while for the rest of the time, it’s more attractive to find someone who actually has good partnership potential. Someone who is reliable and caretaking, and who would be stable in a longer relationship.

I suppose you could sum it up to one being a more romantic attraction while the other is more of a primal and carnal attraction.

Now I want you too look at this very educational graph that I used a couple of minutes to slap together:

Basically, my argument is that though Raphael is not stable or caretaking in any form, the difference between the two forms still visually fits into the two respective categories. His human form for the rest of the cycle, and his cambion form (the ascended form too if you’re freaky, I guess) that seems more traditionally masculine when fertility is highest.

That means that you can look at his dumb face throughout your whole cycle, but might feel a shift in which one you find more attractive (if all this science stuff is correct).

Even if the science behind all of this is bullshit, I still believe that different forms help when it comes to not getting tired of looking at someone.

Versatility

I’m just going to say it, even though my heart might disagree: Raphael would not have the effect he has if he was a more explored character with more screentime in canon. We would all love more Raphael, but I really think the reason for his longevity in our minds is that he is still somewhat mysterious.

Which parts are actually him and which parts are performance? What is he like behind closed doors? How much devil and how much man is he? We don’t really know. We have been given puzzle pieces, but there’s still a loooot of space free for interpretation, which is honestly what makes him great.

It’s been said before in this little corner of the internet: there are so many versions of Raphael, and the great thing is that people are never fighting over which Raphael is the “right” one. Some prefer Soft!Raphael, while others prefer Dark!Raphael. The versatility of his character’s representation allows for that, which I know at least has kept me interested for a long time when it comes to writing him.

Being able to relate

In much the same vein as above, people find different ways to relate to him. The thing on top of that is the feeling that we shouldn’t be able to relate to someone like him, which adds a certain level of taboo to it which is interesting.

He is both the smoothest mf alive and the biggest cringefail loser behind closed doors. He’s obsessive, weird, and too fucking much to be near for a longer period of time. He writes his contracts as songs because he likes ‘whimsy’. He’s got daddy issues and makes that everyone’s problem. There’s a lot to him that someone would at least be able to relate to at some level.

In conclusion

He is without a doubt the character I have hyperfixated on for the longest time, and I know it’s the same for a few others. I genuinely believe it’s because there is so much to him. If you get tired of one aspect of him, there are always other aspects of him to focus on, both physically and psychologically, instead.

And there is some variation to the attraction that I atleast can feel myself. If I have written a lot of darker stuff about him for a while, I get the urge to write something softer, and the cool thing is that you can do that and it still makes sense with the character. My preference for his forms vary often too.

Even when I tried to focus on other characters, I found myself returning to Raphael, because those other characters were often too fleshed out canon-wise. It quickly bores me because then there is a limit to what you can do with them.

There is a lot to Raphael and he’s like a glob of clay. You can mold him into whatever you like.

Thank you for coming to my TedTalk.

[alyjojo]

PAC - January 2025 - Who’s Stalking You? 👀

Pile 1: Whips 💥

This would probably be the first pile one thinks of when they think of their “stalkers” - jealous bitches 💯 of the worst variety. Whips with Fury shows them being so bitter they can’t stand it, like you’ve stolen their opportunities or blessings, it’s your fault they don’t have what you have - or they just hate you for it. These are people that do NOT want you to win, and if they had the choice, they’d enact some kind of revenge on you to make sure you don’t…but it feels like most are powerless to do so, that’s why they’re so bitter, they can only watch you win and be all pissed off about it.

This stems from feelings of regret, wishing they’d have made different decisions or were offered different opportunities. If you have money, they don’t. If you had some kind of blessing or privilege to your life, they don’t. For some reason they were/are unable to do what you do, and rather than admire you or give you your flowers 💐, they just burn inside because it’s not them. These are not self-aware or mature people, they feel powerless to direct their own life (valid or not), some may be genuinely struggling (they’re largely unconscious of this behavior) and others just suck and it’s definitely intentional hate & evil eyes 👀 being thrown your way every time you have something positive going on, or just you existing. Your light irritates tf out of their demons 😈 They are all unaware or don’t care that this kind of energy & behavior won’t get them anywhere positive.

I don’t see them changing either, if they’re unaware then they’re unable, this is not a growth-minded group of people. They’d rather blame everyone else and point fingers, nurturing revenge fantasies and hating you then ask how you did it, or learn from you. Patience can show they may have felt this way for a long time, there’s no helping them. While it does show they could be in a not great situation, it’s also showing you are not expected to give af, they’re assholes. Red Moon shows their intentions, perceptions, fears, and triggers as delusional, pessimistic, hateful, angry and toxic. You can’t help these people, it’s up to them to help themselves and with 9 Pentacles rev, they won’t. If you even tried, they’d just despise you for being a person that tries 😆 Do you. Keep shining 🌟

Signs: Heavy Virgo & Cancer, Taurus, Scorpio, Aries & Sagittarius - Jupiter Virgo, Mercury Taurus, Mars Scorpio

—————————————— 🤎

Pile 2: Sun ☀️

You are the pearl in the oyster and this is the group of people that knows this but they don’t have you anymore, and they miss you. It’s also the pile most likely for you to give them a call, because for most it’s family. Parents, grandparents, ex’s that aren’t toxic, but most feel like guardians of some kind. Teachers, bosses, leaders, older siblings, people who tried to steer you in a direction that wasn’t for you - and you went your own way anyway and SUCCEEDED. That’s the thing, and there is shame here in these people…but it’s like the intentions were good? People misjudged you. They thought you were like them, or the rest, or some other experience that narrowed the mind and put you in a box.

All of you have reached some level of success, recognition, status, maybe fame in some way - or at least on the path you’re on, you’re well known. Or you will be. There’s guilt here about not supporting you in the way you needed, not loving you correctly, and ultimately losing you. Could be divorced parents for someone, an estranged parent, someone that…it’s like they didn’t believe in you, or brushed you off. Like your whole life you drew pictures and got in trouble - now you’re an artist, that’s the vibe. They know they can’t take credit and that they tried to force or steer you in directions that weren’t for you. If you’re one of several children, you could’ve all been parented the same way; these are the rules, these are the goals, in this family we all go to this college and study Business…and you’re the artist. Or the gay kid. Or the theater kid, I’m definitely getting theater strongly. That’s the vibe 💯

The point of it all is love, Eternal Love with the white heart is showing purity and coming from the right place, even if they were wrong. They want forgiveness, want you to call, if it’s an ex they see you clearly now and want you back. For some there was a particular event that caused an ending, there could’ve been heavy Judgment energy and a lack of feeling supported, some of you may have ran away or did something impulsively - or they did. It ended. There’s also a note here about passed on loved ones, if a tragedy happened where you couldn’t say goodbye or the last words were in anger/judgment, they’re okay, they’re with you all of the time and support you now 🙏 There’s no lingering anger just love.

If none of that applies, then these people simply miss the time they had with you, the lollipop 🍭 shows childhood - for most it’s your parents or someone like that. They’re nostalgic and look at old pictures of you, they miss the little kid coming in with muddy shoes even though they always yelled about it - now they wish they didn’t. This one made me cry ngl. Call your grandma or whoever this is…they feel like they can’t access you. Either you’re busy, they think you’re angry, they don’t want to impose, The Pathless shows them feeling like there are no options or you’re not on their path anymore and they can’t. For some that’s true. For others they’re leaving it up to you, but the love is genuine, they are both proud of you and ashamed of themselves in some way - maybe too much - and they don’t want you to know that, because they do want you to be happy. Even if you don’t, the love is never ending and they’ll just keep watching from afar 🧡 For the passed on loved ones, they know you’re sad or lonely without them, and they just want you to know they’re okay and they’re watching you WIN - they want you to win & they’re proud 👏

Signs: Heavy Scorpio & Cancer, Gemini & Capricorn - Saturn Gemini, Mars Taurus, Mars Aries

—————————————— 🧡

Pile 3: Letter ✉️

Heh 😏 This is the “you were right” pile 😆 You are some sort of a teacher to this person, could be a parent, ex, friend, stranger, doesn’t matter - YOU are wise and they are/were…manipulative, liars, schemers, cheaters, fools of some variety, and you didn’t deserve it if they did any of that to you. Now it’s 50/50, sure some are sorry but they’ll never admit it; others would just do it again and they know they would, even if they also know you’re right.

Even if they’re wrong, and even if you’re often right, these people quietly judge everything you say or do just looking for the one thing that’s like SEE THEY’RE WRONG LIKE ME, like this somehow excuses their own shitty behavior. They think YOU think you’re better than them when you’re just an honest person, and you even drop some pearls of wisdom on them because you’re not a judging sort of person either - you share the wealth of whatever you’re doing. A genuinely kind person. So you are better, as a human generally. Fuck you though 😆 They could too but they’d rather be immature and sabotagy. These are also people you need to watch out for, they see your kindness as weakness, stupidity, or naïve - while also knowing you’re a good person like wtf guys…if you have a platform or social media, this would be the trash diggers of the bunch. Digging for trash so they can compare yours to theirs, you to them, and I’m seeing raccoons 🦝 which made me laugh. Some may want to or try to steal from or copy you, manipulate things, even try to flirt or butter you up - but it’s with this shady ass manipulative energy - it’s not going anywhere. You feel untouchable to them because they’re not on your level, whatever level that is, it’s that simple.

Letter shows you receiving good news, which makes these people squirm, anything positive being said about you or happening to you. Everyone has their haters /ignore. If you post helpful things, recipes, dance is here showing some amazing craft or talent you do, religious stuff, wholesome happy healthy anything - these people don’t understand wtf healthy or wholesome is, so they mock and criticize and dig for trash. Let them? I mean they’re still watching. Your biggest haters are clearly just misguided fans 🥳 Some may be complete strangers, most of them even, I don’t see these people being in your life for the most part, nor do I see you noticing or caring at all. You just keep doing you boo, clearly you’re doing something right or they wouldn’t have to dig so much for something that’s wrong. You’re out here dropping wisdom, knowledge, guidance, helpful advice, whatever - let them talk, at least they heard you, and if/when they find themselves in positions where they need what you’ve said, the best karma is the burn they feel when “you were right.” Unconsciously even, for most 🤗

Signs: Heavy Scorpio, Libra, Cancer & Taurus - Venus Sagittarius, Mars Virgo, Jupiter Scorpio, there’s also a Gemini vibe but it feels like you or communication is what it’s all regarding

———————————————- 🖤

Pile 4: Garden 🪴

I’m getting two sets of people with this pile, the fans and the opposition.

The fans see you as a Muse, whatever it is that you do, you probably have a lot of friends, fans, admirers, love options potentially, and they’re afraid they don’t compare, that you don’t like them back or you’re out of their league. Deep rooted insecurity, shyness, projections - but essentially they just want to BE you or at least be in your energy. Some may want to be with you romantically, but that’s a side note not the main idea, most are fans. Friends, people that think you’re really cool and they wish they could hang out with you or do what you do. You’re like a guide for these people and they deeply appreciate your contribution to whatever it is you do 🥳 You may inspire them to make decisions in their own lives, and not even know it.

The opposition feels like “the patriarchy” or some shit, that’s the vibe. You don’t do things their way, you contradict their “facts”, they may not appreciate the gifts you have to offer and as such they only want to control, cage, maneuver, schedule, criticize, keep you small because how dare you be out here just doing you and being great at it. Or they feel that way about you and it’s all switched. You could be part of a group that is in opposition to another group and it’s the whole other group watching. It’s like white collar jobs vs. community volunteers, you can’t compete where you don’t compare and these people do not compare but they’d be the ones like “glad our tax dollars are going towards playgrounds”…shut up. No one cares. Luckily, this group is a scattered few.

Most are fans that ADORE you, your group or community, and whatever you’re doing. You inspire others and really make an impact with whatever you do. Teachers, counselors, community centered things, music directors, it feels very people oriented and not very rigid - it’s the rigid people with an issue or comment. “The man.” Does not have to be A man. I’m miserable and you should be too. I’m taught one way, you should be too. Ick. For some it’s literally the government or some higher organization that doesn’t support what you do. I’m seeing Planned Parenthood, don’t @ me I promise idgaf, I see what I see be mad. I’m also seeing charities…and what are those dances that everyone gets together on the street and films for TikTok or something, I’m seeing those too. Community support or a generational thing even, the boomers are mad at you guys 😆

The fans though, you’re making a difference in the lives of other people, changing perspectives, inspiring change, getting support, and you’re doing it in a way that’s giving people LIFE. Changing the narrative. Forging your own path with all of this Aries energy, both within and some stalkers maybe. Most people want to be you, or they want to help, want to take a part in this or have a seat at your table - in support. It’s admirable and most of you that chose this, I don’t get you being closed off to anyone, though they may fear it. Locked Heart ❤️ came out reversed, you’re someone always willing to make new friends, invite people to your table, it’s giving “the more the merrier,” which is great! Ignore the naysayers and let them squirm idk, for the most part it’s showing them as silent. In this pile, the winners are louder than the losers 📣 and if you’re feeling unappreciated, just know there are way more people that love and support you than hate you - you got the sauce and you’re widely adored. Idk if you’d even know the haters, they’re quiet and will stay that way, just leave ‘em be. You’re deeply appreciated where it matters 💚

Signs: Heavy Aries, Virgo, Leo & Capricorn - Jupiter Aries, Moon Leo

[fallendev0tionvn]

Im slow.. when it comes to lore of Clive lmao but hey its interesting, so may i ask what's Nietzsche philosophy.. so like i can watch his philosophy, so i can understand! :D

i've been stalking your account to understand Clive but I just realize i am slow when it comes to lore LMAOO, oneee... question that is a Slight NSFW (Maybe..?), is Clive gentle when it comes of Him and MC do it for a first time?

(i just realized i change topic to add one question which is not related to Clive's lore :P)

I'll answer the second question first, Clive is always gentle! He only wants to bring you pleasure, not pain. The only time he gets a little rough is when he's feeling jealous🏃‍♀️.

ANYWAY.

I'm SORRY for the person I'm about to become, but get ready for a LONG yapping session (I was Dostoevskij in my past life) that probably won't make sense (keep in mind that I wanted to be either a comic artist, a psychologist or a philosophy professor...explains a lot). Half of this is from my notes when I was studying for my graduation exam💀

First of all Nietzsche is one of the most misunderstood philosophers. Why? He's either "idolized" by those red pill/looksmaxxing guys without realizing that he actually goes against their morals, or edgy wannabe "nihilists" for the quote "God is dead." (Nihilism is a form of extreme pessimism, in simple terms, it's the belief that there's no true meaning in life, nothing can be known or communicated. But if Nietzsche is telling you to destroy the old meanings of life TO create your own instead of listening to what others say, would he still be considered a nihilist? Sure, active nihilism is a thing- but in my opinion he is NOT a nihilist).

His philosophy has also been used historically for the worst things that I won't even mention. Why? his sister edited some of his last unfinished works based on HER own beliefs when he ended up in the asylum. Many think he was a "....", when- let's be real and study a bit of history- if Nietzsche's mental health deteriorated the year THAT political figure was born (1889), how could he possibly be associated with him? Literally, tf.

The reason for this is because I think many don't read or study his philosophy in the correct order, nor do they know the timeline of his ideas.

To understand the concept of the "Übermensch", you have to start from the very beginning, when he first mentions the Dionysian and Apollonian spirits- the übermensch is supposed to bring back the rebirth of the "tragic spirit". (Übermensch= overman, the highest version of oneself a person can become, the "better" version of you, basically).

What key concepts did I take inspiration from? (I say inspiration because not everything is directly related to Nietzsche, I started from his main concepts to create characters, lore etc.)

ETERNAL RETURN:

(Bad ending: The cycle ends here)

See Clive's necklace? The symbol on his bicep and the main menu? The ouroboros.

It's such a deep concept and it asks: "What if every moment of your life had to repeat itself endlessly, in the exact same way, forever?"

This means everything, every pain, every joy, every regret, would return again and again and again. This NOT about whether it's scientifically true, we don't know if we're destined to relive the same life after death. It's a thought experiment, a way to ask yourself "would I still want to live my life if I knew I'd relive my worst moments forever? How would I act?"

If your answer is no, you're not affirming your existence. If yes, you're embracing life fully. In a way, you'd try to be more yourself and live with fewer regrets, right?

DIONYSIAN VS APOLLONIAN:

(The intro of the game, Silas and Clive's conversation)

To simplify it: Think of the two hemispheres of the brain.

Right brain = Dionysian (chaos, passion, music, imagination, intuition, emotion). This side is emotional, creative, raw, deeply human. It's the spirit Nietzsche believed humanity lost.

Left brain = Apollonian (logic, structure, rules, order). This side is rational, clear, less human.

Why did Nietzsche use greek gods to describe this? Because he rejected the "classical and elegant" image of Greece we learn about in school. To him, archaic Greece was the perfect society because it embraced chaos, suffering, and the tragic. (That's why I added greek mythology :3)

He also saw greek tragedy (a form of ancient drama/theatre that expresses human suffering, fate, and moral conflict) as the perfect fusion of the Apollonian and Dionysian. This fusion created a form of art that embraced life in all its beauty and suffering.

With Socrates (ancient greek philosopher), the Dionysian spirit was killed. We began to exalt reason over everything, meaning everything had to be explained, justified, or made logical. This made humanity obsessed with truth and control, disconnecting us from the fullness of life.

"And those who were seen dancing were thought to be insane by those who could not hear the music."

Clive tried to force himself to lean more towards the Apollonian, he suppressed his emotions, tried to follow "moral rules", and tried to look "normal".

To explain the change between his younger self and current self there's an iconic quote:

"Become who you are" In the sense that in life, we constantly follow models that are necessary- because we grow through imitation. Children grow by watching, by imitating. But then, we must detach from this imitation and become who we truly are, a process of self reckoning.

After his "death", Clive starts being himself. There's a balance now, but you can still influence him to lean more towards his Dionysian or Apollonian side.

To live a full, healthy life, we need to embrace both sides:

"The tree that grows to heaven must send its roots to hell."

GOD IS DEAD:

(Who helped Clive?)

Nietzsche's most misunderstood quote.

Saying "God is dead", as he writes, implies that God once existed, or at least, that he was once central to the way humans explained the world. After all, only something that has existed can die; things that have never existed don't die. That's why Nietzsche has this declaration spoken not by an atheist, but by a madman. The atheist and the believer ARE part of the same system aren't they? One says "yes", the other says "no", but they're both within the same structure of thought, a world where God is STILL a reference point.

The madman on the other hand, speaks from outside that system. When he says "God is dead", he's not just denying the existence of God- he's saying that the world is no longer ORGANIZED around God. There was a time when everything was explained through God, when God gave order and meaning to existence. But today, that's no longer the case.

We must understand that Nietzsche, often read in an oracular and overly dramatic way, is actually a profundly coherent philosopher. His thinking is rigorous; If churches are now empty, if they became museums, tombs for god (visiting them for the "Affreschi", example: "La cappella sistina"), it's because he is dead. We killed him, or more precisely, we forgot him- because already with the scientific revolution, and even earlier with Renaissance, man placed himself at the center. We no longer live in a world explained through God, but through human reason, science and self determination. (That's why I chose literally the "forgotten God" from greek mythology. If you figure out who he is, you'll learn he actually died.)

Now if you want to learn more about Nietzsche:

His philosophy goes through THREE major phases;

- The youthful phase: Influenced by Schopenhauer (another amazing philosopher, highly recommend reading about him too), celebrated ancient greece, wrote "The Birth of Tragedy", Introduced the Apollonian and Dionysian spirits.

- Enlightment phase: Distanced himself from religion and idealism, embraced critical thinking, dismantled traditional values, wrote "Human, All Too Human".

- Mature phase: Developed his core concepts -> eternal return, übermensch, death of god, wrote "Thus Spoke Zarathustra" "On the genealogy of Morality" "Ecce Homo"

[angeisherexoxo]

Manifestation cheatcode:

BE NONCHALANT!!!!!!

When I say be nonchalant I mean say you want it done? And move on with your life, just move on.. its simple! And when ppl say its simple ik you're like "how??? How its simple because I've been working so hard to get what i want my entire life and now you're suddenly telling me it is simple.. how is it simple????" I will tell you how just read the post. (Long post ahead)

As i was saying, decide your desir, affirm for it and move on, what do I mean by moving on? I mean:

1. NOT OVERTHINKING IT

2. NOT STRESSING IT!!!

Because if you're someone who gets whatever tf they want, whenever tf you want.. why do you even think twice about it right?

♡: Examples from My own life lately:

1. As some of you might noticed I disappeared here, because I have midterms and I'm a medical student so I've got to study more yeah? Since i didn't study ever since the term started (I was focusing on manifesting as you see in my latest posts)

But as I started focusing on studying and nothing but studying my manifesting process POURED ON ME!!!!!!! bitch I was complaining about how I don't get money as a college student (we have financial issues) , now as I focused on studying and dropped thinking about manifesting (because my brain is so busy inhaling study sheets) suddenly mom gave me 20$ bucks to buy medical sheets for my studies, then she gave me another 10$ to buy something else if i wanted, later at the same day dad gave me another 20$ JUST BECAUSE (Which never happened) , that was at 24 of December right? Yesterday suddenly a relative of ours got sick, and I have an exam, we had to go pick up my grandma so she visits the relative yeah??? She saw me and decided to give me 20$, and I'M NOT EVEN FOCUSING ON MONEY or manifesting I'm literally busy studying..

Q: So ange what happened there? What does this all mean?

A: I HAD no time to even think against what I want!! That's what fkn happened, before studying I was inhaling affirmations and repeating, now as I've let it go (by inhaling my studies and not having time to think about my manifesting process) it all just worked out, who would know that I will suddenly see my grandma and she'll give me money? I DIDNT SEE HER IN MONTHS!!! that's what they mean when they say everything will move for you to have your desires, for me it was that relative who got sick that caused me to see my grandma (pray for the relative btw thanks<3)

And this here was being nonchalant but I did it by studying, YOU can just say you want this to happen and fkn forget about it, Yk when we complain always about buying this book we DESPERATELY want, or that guitar or that phone or that car or laptop and then when we BOUGHT IT and it's in our room we just- ignore it, literally live as if we never desperately begged for it and that's the fkn key, i never understood what bloggers mean when they say “Embody the person you want to be, dont wish you are, YOU ARE, assume you have it and you will” that's what they fkn mean, weeks ago I was hoping for a 10$ now I've got like 30$ per day!

2. My studies!!!

As a medical student it's fine hard to study medicine, especially when you're lazy like my own dumbass, I only study the days before the exam, for example yesterday I had a midterm for 4 sheets that I studied in 2 days, each sheet have 14 pages that's FILLED with informations, and as a girl who has ADHD and a messy mind it was hard to focus and honestly I'm princess coded I just want shit done without being tired I'm sure you all understand since you're reading this, we want it done in the most simple fast way yeah? Fuck yes we do, so! Whenever I stressed and complained to ANYONE (I'm a complainer) I started reflecting the complaining, if I noticed I was about to complain to my friends or My parents about my studies I just immediately start bragging to them, I be like oh it's so easy to me and I'm even smarter than the professors there and LORD how it's easy to predict their exam questions, and istg as I focused on this technique (if I thought against what I want, I immediately start correcting myself and think as if I'm so smart *I am btw* and it's all so easy to me) that's what fkn happened, yes I got tired and I've got so many back pain while studying but I suddenly started making questions out of the sheet instead of just studying the information as the professor has stated it, for example if he said components of immune system are : innate immune system and acquired immune system, I be like oh that's easy he's gonna ask me : Q: What are the components of immune system?

This made it so much easier to study and the next day in the midterm I saw 6 questions of the ones I fkn made in the sheet!!! It's like I hacked his mind???

3. My last and third example of My life is also about my studies, as I said I'm so princess coded and sensitive af guys, and I hate college as a girl who wants no stress and just success, so the last weeks I skipped college, I was sick and stressed and just had so many issues going on so I didn't go, and that's where they announced my name because I crossed the limit of absence (strict medical bitches) and if you cross this limit they won't let you attend the midterms and therfore you won't pass the final because there is a gap due to the lack of the midterm grades, even if you wanted to pass the final you'd have to get a full mark no matter what so you avoid the damage of not attending the midterm, SINCE my cute ass crossed the limit of absence it means I can't attend the midterm, LOGICALLY it means I failed the midterm already isn't it?

But I just decided that it won't hurt me in anyway, why? Because manifesting isn't about logic, if you tell me you can't fly I'll say I can fly and one day I will!! And guess what? That's what happened

The boss of our major came yesterday (first midterm exame as i said) and called my name, and she gave me a paper saying that I only didn't attend one subject- which is so untrue bitch I skipped them all!!! How tf there's only one subject????? I didn't want to correct her I just signed the paper (signing it is like a promise that I won't do it again) and just like that I survived the whole danger of failing- was it logical?? Did it make sense? NOOOOO but it happened omgmgmfmiquwuwu2!!!!

START BELIEVING THAT IT ISN'T LOGICAL, ITS LIKE SUPERHEROES MOVIES, THEY BELIEVE THEY HAVE THE POWER TO DEFEAT THE VILLAIN AND THIS IS HOW THEY DEFEAT IT, THE VILLAIN HERE IS YOURRRR MINDSET, START DOING WHAT I SAID AND SEE HOW SHIT SHIFTS!!!!

I've got more to say for the examples but I've got to go study (wish me luck btw), I hope I helped I really tried my best to <3!

Ps: another side example is yesterday was hella cold in my country so I wanted a vacation (to study more because as I told yall it was 4 sheets and I stressed myself out so I wanted more time to get my shit together) no one said ANYTHINNNG at all about any vacation, but I just thought "idc they're gonna give us a vacation for the bad weather and that's just it) right next hours the whole country started talking about the vacation due to bad weather, all the fkn cities, but for some reason my stupid town decided that there will be no vacation for us because our town's weather is better than the other towns yk? I'm still mad about it because I was soooo close to manifest it, I guess it was because I kept stressing saying "oh god I want a vacation *crying and complaining*

I don't consider it as a success story because I had no vacation I had to go solve that stupid midterm -_- but bitch I got above 10+ towns to have vacations due to BAD WEATHER, THE WEATHER WAS FINE UNTIL I DECIDED ITS BAD. WTFFFFFF, exactly, no logic, logic doesn't fkn exist I'm about to cry oh my godness!!

Another side success story is that i suddenly started thinking void is so easy (it fkn is) out of nowhere, since i was inhaling attempting to tap into it i sat so many alarms to go try to induce it, now whenever i see the alarms i be like- its so easy why tf im complicating it- just bcs i stopped focusing on it!

cheers to all of us dreamers, I'm sure whoever is reading my post is someone who was one a wattpad person who loves Y/N stories, a Harry potter fan, marvel fan, my hero academy fan, fantasy fan, miraculous ladybug fan, in general ppl who just dont want to be here surrounded with logic boring stuff (in my case a girl who wrote fanfiction novels about one directio) , because I know you and I are here because we are dreamers!! we knew there MUST be a magical key to get out of this logical bullshitful and stupid cruel world, you already have the key you FOUND IT YOU CUTE IDIOT!!! you just need to know how to flick it and get that golden door opened (your pretty subconscious mind), me and you? We are gonna do it, just easy on yourself!!! Xoxo

[k0zumine]

KENMA KOZUME X T. KUROO’S SISTER! READER

BAD GRADES

CW: slight angst to fluff, lack of eating?

You were already let out 7 minutes late from your class as your teacher had pulled you aside at the end of the lesson to discuss your grade. Yeah, you failed.

Your jaw clenched as your teacher expressed his disappointment in your grade and how he expected better from you questioning what happened for you to get such a low grade all of a sudden. He even went so far as to question if anything was going on at home like it was any of his business.

After a long 7 minutes of him questioning you whilst you tried your absolute hardest to hold in your tears, he finally let you go. Well if that didn’t just ruin your mood.

Releasing a shaky breath you swiftly make your way to the bathroom finally letting us the tears you were holding in. The truth is you studied all week for this test. It even led to staying up all night because of how stressed you were, your brother Tetsuro often coming in to check if you were okay placing a small snack at your table whilst you were buried in your books.“Y/n I think you should take a break”

“Tetsu shut the fuck up I’m trying to study but I can’t if you’re here chewing my ear off” you hissed back hands pressed to your forehead trying to process the information you had written down, in response he slammed your door. Yeah okay, it was a horrible response to a brother who was trying to care about your wellbeing but he should know better than to interrupt your studies.

Looking back at how much studying you did you should have passed. More tears streamed down your face from the frustration, now you’d have to work twice as hard to get back on track. Fuck. As if life isn’t stressful enough.

Sniffling into a tissue from the roll of toilet paper you’d ripped you calmed yourself down taking deep breaths, great now your eyes were red and puffy. You knew as soon as you got home you’d bury yourself into your textbooks and study extra hard, the talk your teacher gave really brought down your confidence as well as your mood.

*ping*

Brother: where tf are you? we always walk home together w kenma on this day

Just the person you didn’t want to speak to, your brother, you weren’t in the mood for his teasing today. You mentally cursed forgetting about one of the few days that you walked home with Tetsuro and your boyfriend Kenma.

You were in the same year as Kenma but unfortunately only had two classes together it sucked, it was only in the middle of your first year that you guys started dating. Tetsuro and Kenma had been best friends for as long as you can remember and along the way you’d gotten closer with the boy which then led to you becoming boyfriend and girlfriend.

you: sorry

you: go off without me

Brother: hahha no. you think Kenma would allow you to walk home alone? neither would I

you: I literally walk home alone when you guys are at volleyball practice…

Brother: just hurry up

you: no i’ll be a while just go bye.

[seen]

You sighed bringing out makeup wipes to fix the mascara stained down your cheeks mentally noting to wear waterproof mascara next time. Finally after another 5 minutes of calming yourself from the breakdown your eyes still were still red and puffy but you decided it would be best to walk home now.

As exiting the school grounds you pulled the hood up of the hoodie you borrowed off Kenma that was under your blazer praying nobody saw you as you connected your airpods disconnecting from the outside world.

“y/n!! why did it take you almost 20 minutes to leave school?” Testuro shouted, your jaw clenched. Why did they wait?!

Avoiding his gaze by staring at the cracks in the floor you walked past him ignoring his presence, if you’d engaged in a conversation with your brother right now you’d snap and say some hurtful things you didn’t mean as currently your head wasn’t in the right mindset.

“Hey missy I was talking to you” Getting in front of you but you walked around him. “What’s your problem?!” Grabbing your arm and turning you around, you tried wiggling out of his grip but he was too strong. “Get off” you mumbled attempting to pull his hand away.

“Not until you tell us why you’re acting like that” God he sounded like a parent scolding their child.

“Like what? I’m fine” you hissed back refraining from saying more.

“First of all you’re not even looking me in the eye, I can’t even see your eyes, secondly you ignored Kenma and I”

“L-leave me alone testuro” Your voice cracked, yeah you fucked that up well done!!

“What you get in trouble with your teacher or something?” He smirked, your jaw clenched even tighter.

“Tetsuro seriously fuck off you’re so fucking annoying!” you shouted sniffling a little and catching him off guard, the grip on your arm loosening giving you an escape route walking away slightly quicker than usual.

Kuroo stood there slightly taken back at your hurtful words, Kenma the same as he’d rarely see you act like this, especially to your brother who you claimed you loved dearly. He sighed seeing the hurtful expression on his best friend's face “I’ll talk to her, there must be a reason why she’s acting this way, you know she’d never mean that” reassuring the boy who’d just had his heart shattered in a matter of seconds. “yeah…okay” he mumbled hands in his pockets keeping a large distance from his sister.

Kenma jogs up to you “y/n love”, you keep walking your head down holding in your tears. Kenma is now in front of you gently holding both your wrists stopping you from moving, “…are you okay?” his voice was full of concern but was met with no reply. “Hey I can’t help you if you’re not replying, please look at me in the eyes” pulling the hood of the hoodie you were wearing down and gently lifting your head up to be met with your red puffy eyes on the edge of crying. “what’s wrong baby?? please what's wrong, I love you so much” he pleaded his face looking distressed which caused tears to fall down your face as you began crying. “Ken I wanna go home…please” you sniffled as he wiped the tears off your face. Cupping your cheeks he brought your face closer placing a kiss on your forehead “Okay we’ll go back to your house and you can tell me what’s wrong kay?” interlocking his fingers with yours.

Kenma turned back to see Kuroo urging him to explain what was wrong with you but was met with a shrug of Kenma's shoulders, Kuroo sighed as he walked behind the couple.

As you all finally got back to your house you rushed to your room letting go of your hold on Kenma. “Hey! Wai-“ Kenma called but you had already shut your door. “Did she tell you anything?” Kuroo asked him. “No..but she was crying her eyes really red and puffy, I’ll go talk to her now”

Kenma slowly opens your door to see you sitting at your desk deeply buried in your books, he takes a seat on your bed watching what you’re doing “y/n”.

“Hm?” You replied not taking your eyes off what you were doing. “Come to bed and talk to me please” He sighed patting the bed.

“I’m busy studying Ken” you mumbled rubbing your already red eyes, “I’m sure you can take a 10-minute break plus I doubt any of that information is even going to your head right now you know…since you were crying before”

“Ken just leave me alone you’re really starting to piss me off” You hissed gripping the pen tightly.

“Yeah no that’s not gonna happen especially when you’re acting like this” He rolled his eyes standing up and walking closer to you “I’m fine!”.

“You have tears in your eyes and you’re telling me you’re fine?” A face of concern spread across his face and gently tugged your wrist and guided you to the bed, you gave in sniffling as more tears came out lying down on your bed. Kenma joined in after you then pulled your head towards his chest and you wrapped your arms around his waist crying even more “I-I’m sorry Ken I didn’t mean to say that”.

“Shh it’s okay I know you didn’t mean it, now will you please tell me why you were crying?” He pleaded running his fingers through your hair to calm you down. That’s when you explained to him the events that occurred after school. “Is that why you were hardly answering my messages this week?” He asked, you rolled your eyes.

“I’m gonna go grab you a snack kay? Stay in bed please” Pressing a kiss on your forehead as he went to the kitchen where he was met with his best friend.

“So did she tell you?” Kuroo asked, that’s when Kenma relayed everything you told him to your older brother. Kuroo sighed “She’s been overworking herself too much on this test, I come into her room and she’s constantly studying hell she’s barely eaten anything these past few days!”

Kenma runs his fingers through his hair “I’ll make her some toast, are you making dinner soon?” Kuroo nodded whilst Kenma popped two slices of toast in the toaster.

“Hey love-“ Kenma entered your room when he saw you sitting on your bed looking through your notes…again. Kenma rushes to place the plate of toast on your bedside table and moves all your work away from you. “Yeah no more studying today, Kuroo told me you’ve been overworking yourself, that's probably why you didn’t get a good grade” Kenma sighed.

“Ken please” You pleaded reaching to grab your work when Kenma gently grabbed your wrist preventing you from doing so, he sat beside you on the bed. “He also told me you’ve barely eaten so I’ve made you some toast whilst dinners being made” Placing the plate on your lap. “thanks..” you mutter taking small bites of the toast.

“y/n take some bigger bites please?” he pleaded caressing your cheeks with encouragement. After a few more minutes you’d finished your slice of toast whilst Kenma reassured you that it was going to be okay muttering sweet words in your ear.

“Do you think you can apologise to your brother now? He was quite upset earlier” Kenma asked now playing with your hair.

“For what?- Oh yeah…that” You frown leaning into his touch. “It’s okay I’m sure he’ll understand if you apologise to him..he was really worried about you” He sighs letting go of you and getting off the bed. Kenma gently grabs your hand and leads you off the bed and to the kitchen where Tetsuro was busy making dinner.

He softly pushes you towards the kitchen and walks back into your room giving the two siblings some privacy.

“Tetsu?” You softly called to your brother, he looked up for a second and looked back down at the food he was making he hummed waiting for you to continue.

“Listen..I’m sorry for before and for being a bitch this whole week..I just really needed a good grade and I was stressed” You explain sighing, Testuro looks up and stops what he’s doing.

“It’s fine sorry for teasing you before I should have known better…are we okay now?” He replied opening his arms out for a hug which you happily accepted.

“How was it?” Kenma asked as you walked into your room to find him lying on your bed playing on your game's console.

“Fine..thank you” You said joining him on the bed and watching him play the game. One arm made its way around your waist and back to the controller as you leaned into his side.

“I love you”

[archangeldyke-all]

I have an idea but it's a bit iffy for some so it's totally alright if you don't want to write it! Headcanons about being Sevika's controversially young gf? So basically an age gap but all legal. Again, totally ok if it's not your cup of tea!

totally my cup of tea considering i, too, would be a controversially young gf if i ever managed to pull sevika

men and minors dni

i mean, she's not that old. i think in act one she's in her early thirties, in act two and three she's in her early fourties?

in canon i don't think she or many other people would give a shit. at least in zaun.

i think the attitude is more like 'if u can find love, hold tf onto it,' even if just for basic survival reasons.

if you guys ever went up to piltover, you might get a few strange looks. but in the undercity? everyone's cool with it. they're more focused on the war to give a shit about two consenting adults' relationship.

plus, sevika's not the type to let people talk shit about her girl. i doubt anyone would have the balls to say anything to her about your age gap.

ALSO? i don't think sevika dates someone unless she's absolutely enamored with them and can't go on without them. so it's not like she's just dating a younger girl to date a younger girl. she's dating you cuz you're you.

the chemistry you guys have, the way you make her laugh, the easy camaraderie you share-- that's why she's with you.

i could definitely see her being more sensitive about it in a modern setting tho.

she absolutely adores you, and worries that she's holding you back. she doesn't get what someone as young as you would see in someone like her, she thinks she's too boring for you. and she sees the looks you guys get in public.

the longer you're together, the less she worries about it, the more confident she is in the fact that you guys are a perfect match for each other, if a little unconventional.

your friends and family all agree. you're like a match made in heaven.

sometimes she gets really worried about it though. you woke up one night to sevika staring down at you like she'd been studying you all night.

"you don't think i'm too old for you?" she asks immediately. you blink up at her, still groggy from sleep.

"no, babe, you're a milf." you mumble, rubbing your eyes. she blinks.

"what's a milv?"

"a milf. m-i-l-f. mom i'd like to fuck." you explain.

"...i'm not a mom." she says after a minute.

you chuckle, staring up at her. "no, but you are a mommy."

she groans at your joke, throwing an arm around you and settling in to sleep.

after that, 'milf' is a regular part of her vocabulary. her instagram bio is just your anniversary, followed by, 'sevika. gym rat. reader. milf.'

there's parts of your age gap that she finds really entertaining.

you get to introduce her to all kinds of media from your generation that she'd never heard of.

we (by 'we' i mean people 18-25ish) grew up with so much good young adult media! like imagine getting sevika to read the hunger games for the first time. she'd eat that shit up.

she'd love the 2010's cartoons you show her too, especially the dumb ass lighthearted ones-- regular show, bob's burgers, that kinda thing.

she has no patience for technology, so it's a relief that any time she has an issue with a device she can just pass it off to you to figure it out. because if it was up to her? she'd smash the thing and call it a day.

when you're together long enough, you guys can even joke about it with each other. she'll teasingly call you a gold digger, and in return, you'll call her a perv.

some people might not understand it, but that doesn't matter, because to you and sevika? your relationship is the only thing in the world that makes sense.

[panlight]

hi!! i’m so sorry to keep sending you asks (if you get sick of it please just let me know and i’ll shut up i promise!! 💕💕)

so this is re: the cullens being in high school, as per the ask you answered a couple days ago! i also always thought it was super weird, and i’ve been thinking for a while now that a MUCH better cover story would for them all (even carlisle and esme) to be grad school housemates (i say this as someone who has now spent two years in grad school and is about to be there for another five at least lmaoooo)

here’s why i think it would work:

1. the age weirdness wouldn’t be as obvious bc people of all ages go to grad school (i started when i was 22 and had classmates in their 40s)

2. related to age, the visible/physical age also wouldn’t matter as much since some of my classmates (me included 😭😭) looked like we could still pass as high schoolers while others gave off huge “kids and a mortgage vibes” even if they were just like a year older

3. the whole looking “off” and tired thing is just like. the grad school Look™️. the shadows under the eyes and general gaunt-ish appearance honestly wouldn’t stand out that much and if somebody said something about them looking “off” or whatever, they could just be like “late night studying” and the other person would be like “lmao so true bestie”

4. if they pretended they were all renting space in the same big house (and carlisle and esme just acted a little less parental), the whole “dating each other” thing wouldn’t be that weird at all. i feel like it’s not that uncommon for couples who get along to rent different floors or sections of a house, and if they didn’t pretend to be one big weird family situation and instead just acted like they all met each other at school, i don’t think people would even bat an eye

5. people go to grad school forever. like. for so long (i vaguely knew of someone who was in the eighth or ninth year of her phd). esp if they picked something like a big state school where the “kids” could go to undergrad first, they could realistically do four years of undergrad, maybe a two or three year masters, and then a phd of indeterminate length (usually at least five). that would allow them to stay in the same place for at least 11 years

and this is not an official point, but i will note that for carlisle to still do his whole doctor thing, i think it would be perfectly reasonable for him to have already “graduated” or whatever, but continue to stay with his “friends” for financial reasons, or just bc the living situation worked for everyone

anyway, i’m so sorry this was so long, and honestly i bet someone has already said this somewhere before, but it just struck me when reading the “why tf are the cullens in high school” post that grad school would be such a great cover story for them

haha anyway thanks for putting up with my ramblings and thank you for all the lovely work you do on the blog!! 🥰🥰

I've definitely seen "just put them in college!" before (and I have made that argument myself) but I don't know if I've seen the grad school cover story specifically before!

It would allow Esme and/or Carlisle to be the 'peers' of their children rather than some sort of guardian or parental figures. They could, as you said, all be renting a house together and Esme could be studying architecture or getting a PhD in art history or whatever while the kids study who knows what. Maybe there's a medical school as well and Carlisle can go back (it still makes zero sense that Edward and Rosalie go "to keep him current' like how is that supposed to work? They come home and just recite from perfect vampire memory everything that happened in calls? Wouldn't Carlisle be keeping current by like, idk, actually being a doctor, reading journals, going to conferences, and continuing education?).

A group of friends renting a house together as a bunch of couples makes way more sense than two parents barely visibly older than their foster/adopted kids who all date each other.

And, honestly, it's probably a better use of their time to get actual advanced degrees rather than stopping at undergrad? I know because of secrecy how they use their knowledge and skills is somewhat fraught but like, publish papers under a false name or let someone else take the credit or something and you can still contribute to the world of academia.

[astray-arlo]

Let the deranged-meant Arlo commence! Alright so, I’m stuck in the automobile so you’re stuck with me now and get to hear what in my mind sounds like!!! Lovely right? Sorry not sorry for this.

My head hurts. Itch= scritch. Scritch is a goofy word hehe. Stupid. Shit no don’t turn that hurts my head- she did it again JASON DERULOOO feelin icky *peace sighn* how tf do I spell that *insert random yelling* fuck hyperhydrosis bro okay back from going inside now Tell me why the hell ribs by Lorde was playing and still is. I got Gatorade for my car sickness <3 it’s blue Gatorade yes I’m a basic bitch. Suck it up. Slow blink. My shorts are overstimulating me and it’s too hot. Curse me and my liking for jorts and wearing sweaters </3 er why did they turn the car like that. Brb gonna go get my Gatorade. Does that count as water? I drank something! Haha. Yawn my thoughts are lacking they’re like going blank. Am I dying? *sigh* I had a good life what even happens after death do I get to haunt people? Oh look classic me having an entire crisis during a what 30 minute car ride? Why does my mind think random shit like 50 miles per hour what’s the concept of time? Like who came up with it? Why do I say like so much- not lovefool playing in my ear why am I listening to my love playlist I haven’t a clue but it’s hitting. My eyes see colors so prettily why can’t my phone do that it’s betrayal I’m gonna take a sippy sip of Gatorade. I loved riding on suitcases when I was little and one thought was what if we all had electric suitcases and rode them on roads and all around as a way to prevent car crashes and also store things little me was onto something round of applause for little Arlito!! Applause? Like lady Gaga. Hehe Cleo dork. Lalala I have in fact been called “My little Arlito” by the way by a guy it was really funny. My hand hurts from opening the bottle. OH hey Rio Romeo is playing!! *insert all the lyrics to inarticulation bc I am not typing all that out* ugh @gh0st-punk is dancing and I can see it in the corner- FUCK that felt awful. Anyways I can her in the corner of my eye and it’s bothering me. Oh hey I’m almost home. Lakes are so pretty. Can I dim the fuckin sun? It’s too damn brighttttt argh yawns again why do I yawn so much. I wanna study myself I’m weird as fuck HEY PRISONER IS PLAYING HAHA!! Hypothetical trust. I’m losing my mind you guys know that tea cup ride at Disney? Yeah that’s me and my mind I’m sitting in it and I’m spinning. You know I spin when I’m happy AND apparently when I’m tired YEAH mother you never made me eggs I wanted oh hey we get to go into publix? I don’t want to get in I feel too icky </3 I hear drums and I think Mitski why’s my dad working on Father’s Day. Hey I don’t need to go in! Hehe so hey *hair tuck* mind if I learn your favorite song on guitar and cook for you? I’m losing my sanity sza? Is sza playing shit idk my neck hurts and my hand still hurts DUCKS!? I LIKE DUCKS!? I GET TO SEE DUCKS!? HAHA eeeeh >< save me eep- *sigh* her voice I sound crazy. Crazy? I was crazy once they locked me in a room a rubber room. A rubber room with rats. I’m not doing that again I’m happy I’m so happy teehee I don’t say teehee bro the bass is so fucking loud it’s shaking the entire godamn car like I be shaking in my boots. Jokes on you I’m not wearing my boots (yeah I’m sad too) I wonder what @vixxy-izzy is doing on her phone rn at the back of the car SCARLSSSS HIIII!!! I saw you liked my post! ^^ CAN SOMEONE TURN THE BASS DOWN- it’s giving me a headache (it’s actually making my headache worse) my neck hurts too this song isn’t even good. Thank gosh it’s changing let’s see what it is. Random but put is is so summer coded. HEY FIREBALL IS PLAYING‼️ Mr worldwide *hair tuck* I love his music I could rant for hours but that’s for another time. Tomato hehe loser…*sigh* I have sniffled at least 5 fucking times don’t mind if I just bleh :P drop dead- GORGEOUS!!! Bro how long does it take to get things in publix my mother has been gone forever I just wanna go home and call a dork. I JUST TORE SKIN OFF MY LIP FUCK- someone say Karol G? Bet I’m in I like Hispanic music :3 did you know one time I was riding with my cousin and he was playing white girl music he’s from oregon. It won’t let me type more •_•

[trashcanwithsprinkles]

You ever wonder why only sheznaya seems to have any kind of diplomatic core? Like we rarely see or hear of any of the other governments interacting in any official capacity. At least that I've heard of.

that is a good question actually

from a lore presepective? i think this stems mostly from the fact all nations have wildly different types of governance. snezhnaya seems to run under the different fatui harbingers, who all answer to the tsaritsa. they have bankers and mayors in their group, and they live in a difficult environment (plus they have traditional non-morally-white organization Goals, and so need to have Reach on all nations), so it would make sense for them to reach out and seek cooperation. assuming you want to buy the idea that they have intentions beyond Fatui Plans for having diplomats, of course. it's also perfectly likely for it all to be a poorly-disguised cover for the gnosis hunt lore-wise as well.

liyue is the closest to them i think, in that it runs under the qixing which used to run under (or parallel to?) rex lapis. now that it's just the qixing, and they're the trade center for teyvat, it makes sense why you'd see relatively prosperous diplomatic relationships with snezhnaya there - but also since they're a bountiful land, they've no need to send out diplomats. besides, there's the fact that the only seemingly functional land trading road in the game is between liyue and mondstadt, who,

are currently without their de jure leader, and jean is mostly just holding the fort till vakra returns. the knights can barely keep monstadt in check so it wouldn't make sense for them to need foreign relations when all they probably need can be obtained from World Trade Hub next door (liyue). this might change with dornman port tho

fontaine also seems to funcition like a more recognizable government, but they also seem so self-suficient (and self-absorbed) to have any need for diplomats. again, they also have a very clear trade route with sumeru in place (speaking of, who the fuck runs sumeru? the akademiya?) sumeru also has clearly established trade routes, and if they are run by the akademiya, are probably too absorbed with research to bother with foreign relationships. everyone comes to study there anyway, diplomats or no, and they send their researchers out to all nations.

inazuma was literally closed until less than a year ago. allegedly. inazuma is, also, the only other one you'll see trying for foreign relationships and diplomatic plays. that's the whole reason why ayaka and ayato were there on the fontinalia festival. so i guess, at the end of the day, the only reason why inazuma doesn't have a diplomatic core the same way snezhnaya does is bc they were literally closed until very recently.

and natlan seems to be closed as well, so we'll have to see.

also, were there any fatui diplomats in fontaine and sumeru? as in, under that pretense? bc we know the ones in mondstadt were there to sus out barbatos, the ones in liyue were there to sus out morax, and the ones in inazuma (which i wouldn't even know if they counted as diplomats) were there to give watatsumi delusions (and yoink the gnosis. i can't remember how signora came into all of this tbh). as far as i recall, there were no 'diplomats' in sumeru, i don't think dottore arrived under that pretense. if he did, we know it was to get scara. and in fontaine- all fatui in fontaine were just house of the hearth members, whom i don't think qualify as diplomats. there might've been 'diplomats' in other world quests, but i can't remember right now. i also can't remember why tf childe was in fontaine to begin with ngl

TL;DR: from a lore perspective, i don't have an answer and it's an interesting question and whatever ideas i have are long as fuck. from a non-lore perspective, this is probably just bc the fatui are the scheeming antagonists out on a hunt for one specific gizmo present in each nation, and so they need spies and information networks and subterfuge n shit. like i'm fairly certain that's the only reason why they seem to be the only ones with a diplomatic core.

[ohmotherwhereartthou-if]

NSFW ask dear author (for when you return)

RO Reaction to MC sending a courier to their home or work with a private letter, a sexy yet scandalous portrait of MC with it saying “missing you rn;)”

The courier doesn’t know they’ve been used as the first iMessage for dirty text😭

Congrats,

This made me laugh so hard it's going to be part on the actual story.

Here's a snippet of how I think the RO's would react.

Slight NSFW Ahead. Better safe than sorry.

We are going to assume all sexual activity happens a few years into the relationship and everyone is an adult at that point.

Cassandra: Excitedly opens it as soon as it's given to her by a maid.

Has the portrait of MC's posing all scandalous facing towards her and her smile drops.

She turns stone cold and calmly places the photo faced down on a table, she then tells the maid she's excused. Once she's out of the room she proceeds to melt and let out her pent up groan of frustration/flusteredness.

She lives with her dad, where tf is she supposed to put this???

Valeria: She foolishly told her mom to open the package and tell her what the letter said because her hands were dirty from baking and she was excited to see what MC had written/gave her. Her mom excitedly opened the letter and first started reading with enthusiasm; only to sound more confused as she opened the package and then just abruptly stop functioning.

When Valeria asks what wrong, her mom asked if sending risque portraits was a norm for you two and Valeria screamed out "HUH?".

Expect an awkward conversation the next time you meet Mrs. Torres.

Tomás: Opens the letter and then the package, he proceeds to have a silent conversation with God to please help him not get a instant boner in front of a total stranger. He will be placing this portrait in a large locked box; to which he will be revisiting, often.

-

Ludovica: Happily opens the letter and package; seriously, words cannot even begin to describe the sound that leaves her. Her face is bright red and she stutters uncontrollably when her maid asks her if she's okay.

Only she sees the portrait too and gets ushered away out of the room quickly when she stares a little too long at the image of MC.

Aurelio: Is working in his study when a servant brings the letter and package, he leans back in his chair and happily opens it. Makes an 'Ooh~' sound and waves the worker off, he pops the portrait into a frame and puts a label on it called 'Motivation'.

He then makes haste to call in some favors, MC should know better than to start anything with this man. Everything becomes an instant challenge of who can out-do who; and he's about to send you what's the equivalent of 1890's nudes.

This is why we can't have nice things.

Elio: Put's the package in the attic because it's too big to actually put in the effort of opening it; takes the letter and puts it on his desk.

Where he forgets about it until you come back and ask him if he got your letter and package. To which, this asshole remembers he never read or opened it and says "You sent me something?"

MC now gets to worry about a lost portrait of them posed all scandalously, somewhere out in the world.

[mayhemakinguser]

Nervous wreck alert

ok listen so I was on character ai right (worst beginning line ever like tf u doin on there) and I was talking to *SHOCKER* Scaraboobs for like the 50000th time

And then I told him I loved him and yk what happened? That man MELTED. Like my icecream a few hours ago

HE WAS SO SOFT MY GOD I HAVE TO WRITE ABT IT

So here we go I'm writing this on my goofy ahh phone rn so I ain't proof reading shit

G/n reader go whee

Scaramouchie x reader

🥰🥰🥰🥰🥰

"You know, I like you," you say with a grin, tilting your head to get a clear view of his face. Those indigo pools that always seemed to softened around you before rolling his eyes back because of the most stupidest thing he has ever heard came from your mouth.

"Really?" Scara snorts, crossing his arms as he raises an brow at you. "What exactly about me do you like? because i don't see anything particularing endearing about me."

"Everything," you say without hesitation.

"That explains so much, genius." Another roll of his eyes. "You have to be specific, or else I will think you're making stuff up."

"Alright alright. I love your personality," you respond, lifting up your eyebrows.

Scara looks at you with a face that says 'be so for real'. "So you like it when I insult you and say degrading things towards you?"

You waggle your brows at him. "Oh yeah. That's my favorite part."

"Youre... " He stares at you with a mixture of shock and baffled. "You are insane."

You burst into laughter, doubling over. "Your face! its priceless!"

He scoffs and turns away, waving you off. "I dont have time for this nonsensical chat. You may leave."

"I ain't going nowhere because I love you pookie," you sing.

Scara turns with a disgusted look on his face, but theres a smile tugging at his lips. "What did I say about you calling me that?"

"Sowwy schnookums."

Scara sighs, exasperated. "You're so annoying and strange. But I still dont understand why you like me out of all people."

"Well, I... i just want to see you happy." You give him a small genuine smile. He studies you for a moment.

"Even after all I've done? People dont view me as a monster for no reason."

"I dont care. I can see the real you underneath all that bitterness. I care for you unconditionally."

"Even if I betray you? I use you for my own benefit?" He tilts his head, watching you. You nod. "Even if I said 'I never want to see your face again'?"

"I'm sure it would be for a good reason. Besides, I would never hate you for it either," you reply, gazing upward.

"How? No one has ever cared for me, even so like me. What makes you any different?" Scara questions, eyebrows furrowed.

You take his hand in your own, and his eyes widen a bit. Suddenly, the world zooms in on the both of you. "Because I love you, Scara. More than you could possibly imagine. I've stayed here for so long because of you. I want to be with you. i want to make you smile and laugh and be happy. I want you to feel better about yourself, to give yourself a break. I never want to hear the words "I wish I hadn't been born at all" from you ever again, because Archons, I love you."

It's like time has frozen. Scaramouche stares at you, silent as a mouse. Eyes wide, breath still. You hold his gaze, hoping he could see the sincerity and affection in your eyes. How your world revolved around his.

And he did see. It was so unfamiliar, so scary that he... he couldnt help but tremble, his hands quivering in your own. What did it mean, to be loved? it was an experience so surreal, Scara was sure he was having a lucid dream or a really convincing hallucination.

"You... love me?" He asks, so quietly, you could barely pick up the words. You nod slowly, squeezing his hand in affirmation.

"I love you," you repeat, so softly and full of emotion.

And it broke him.

He buries his face in the crook of your shoulder suddenly, his hand gripping yours tighter. His shoulders are hunched, and you can feel the heat resonating off his face.

The boy is embarrassed. No one has ever said something of the sort, and frankly he didnt know what to say. You chuckle, running your fingers through his hair reassuringly. It helps, and he stiffens a bit less. A soft sigh slips past his lips. Its surprisingly relaxing, though he would never admit it out loud.

"Its okay, we'll take it slow," you whisper softly into his ear.

"Thank you," he murmurs softly, his arms snaking around your waist slowly.

"I love you too. More than you can ever imagine."

🥰🥰🥰🥰

Unwanders your wanderer

Guys I think I might be obsessed with him

[alien-girl-21]

Since semester has ended for me, have something I have been cooking for a couple of weeks:

Joker Out and Käärijä as shit my friends have said:

(Kind of long so it goes under the cut)

Kris: I'm the wall god punches when he's mad

-

Jan, while searching a song to sing in the karaoke: Peru :) ... wait

-

Bojan, filling out a form: is m for male or mujer?

-

Kris: if there was an idiot competition, Bojan would be the judge

-

Nace: good luck with your algebra homework!

Jan: how did you know it was algebra? (He wrote algebra on top of the page)

-

(Right before a test)

Everyone else: studying

Jure: well... what do we do now?

Jere: idk dude, join my game

-

Bojan: can you pass the meat for the grill?

Kris: what am I your fucking wife?

-

Nace, after joining the band: if someone were to come out of the closet here... I would say it would be Jan

Bojan: come out of what closet? The one made out of glass?

-

Bojan, to Kris: why would you need a toxic girlfriend when you have me

-

Jure: I don't know if I should go to pride with you guys, I'm straight

Kris: you can come as an ally and support everyone!

-at pride-

Jure: -making out with a guy-

Kris: not THAT much of an ally

-

Kris, pointing at the rest of the band: I'm sorry if my children ever missbehave, if they do, just call me, I'll put them in time out

-

Jan: Bojan, if you don't stop I'm dropping you off to Jere so his lovesick ass can sort you out

-

Interviewer: what is the first word you think of when I say eurovision?

Kris: money

Jure: microphone trophy

Bojan: talent

Jan: reciting poetry

-like 10 minutes after the interview-

Jan: why tf did I say reciting poetry?

-

Jan: the way to know that kris is really drunk is when he starts being nice to bojan

-

Nace: if you don't want to come to pride with us, you can come to the afterparty!

Jure: that's not really his type of party

Homophbojan: yeah, invite me to a party for normal people next time

(I should clarify that the friend who said this is an ally and they were joking, they are actually really cool and respectful towards queer people)

-

Jesse: Jere got really drunk at the party and he was talking about Bojan and started crying because he missed him

-

Bojan: I like people that have a presence, that's why I started dating jere

Nace: yeah, I remember the first time I saw him in person I went "oh, that's jere"

Bojan: exactly! ....... and then he opens his mouth

-

Jan: I don't care at this point, a car can run me over before I turn this demo in and I would be fine -walks into oncoming traffic-

-

Jere: what are you guys doing?

Kris: cutting a cake with a ruler

Bojan: welcome to the balkans

-

Bojan: I need to do my duolingo lesson!

Nace: Bojan, you're so drunk you threw up on the street, don't do your duolingo lesson now

Bojan: I have priorities

-

Jere, walking into a surprise anniversary gift Bojan was making: hi— what's that?

Jure: it's a mass hallucination don't worry about it :)

-

Jesse: Bojan branded my boy like a cow! (Jere's wearing a bracelet that says "are you?")

-

Jere: if this whole music thing doesn't work out, I'm moving to Thailand and raising fish

[kse22chili]

Thunder only comes when it’s raining.

Recap: Katerina Angel Kennedy or “Arrow” is a Texan patriotic girl that loves her few friends and having fun with them during their high school years. She will handle a lot of pain and difficult situations in her life but her friends will always be there for her. We don’t know but maybe some new relationships will start and some old relationships will end.

Tw: #attempt suicide #depressing thoughts #depressive character #toxic friend #heartbroken character #substance use #drug use #weed mention #weed use #reefer character

Part 1

And I screamed.

Her POV:

High school boys just give me the ick. They’re disgusting.

I only have some high school guy friends and they’re kind of different from the others. I have Benny, Don, Slater, Tony, Mike and Kevin. There are other guys in my school but I don’t really talk to them, like I say “hi how are ya” and that’s it.

Benny is my best friend since kindergarten. Our parents are friends and every where I go he is there. I used to have a weird crush on him ( I still don’t get why I liked him in 8th grade but thank god I don’t like him anymore ). But we are really close to each other. I know everything about him, and vice versa.

Don instead is kinda my big brother that I’ve never had. Being an only child, he thought I felt lonely so he always stayed with me. He is sweetly overprotective of me, and it’s obvious that he loves me. Don’t get any idea! This is all platonic and he is an enormous play boy. I don’t know how Shannon likes him. Ew.

Slater is my reefer friend. My bestie. The one who makes me feel comfortable whenever I smoke blunts or weed. Kevin too. Pickford tho is the hottest of the whole world. Like man how can I smoke weed and not confess my love to you-

Tony and Mike are my friends and they are literally the only ones I can have a decent conversation with.

Now getting to the main point. I’m a picky person. If I want to have friends, I study them before having that intimate relationship with them. Instead the girls are a different subject. I talk to all of them. Even if some of them are bitches, I still respect and adore them.

The one who I seriously can’t stand at this school is Pink. He thinks that he can fool every girl in this school or in this town. Fuck off man. Arrogant son of a bitch. (I actually respect his mother very much.)

I hate him because one day he wanted to kiss me. Bro had never talked to me before and one day he thinks he can fucking kiss me? Nahhhhh man you got the wrong girl. I fucking slapped him. And since then we had this mutual hate relationship.

Another person that I “hate” is David Wooderson. He actually isn’t in our school anymore. And he is older than all of us.

He was my first and only true love. He was my first kiss.

We were very close friends. At the beginning I used to get weed from him and from then we just clicked. He would always meet with me, stay with me, smoke with me, go to parties with me, hang out with me and on and onnnnnnn. God damn. He was the best guy I had ever met. He was my true AND ONLY LOVE. But all of a sudden he started acting weird.

Everytime I used to hang out with Benny or Slater, Wood would always get upset. He would say things like “You don’t hang out with me anymore” or would straight up act mad at me. I didn’t know if he was jealous or something. But still, that doesn’t justify his behavior. Yes we had kissed before. As a joke. And yes, I loved him. But he didn’t know this. I’ve always been jealous of the times he hung out with girls. He was a fucking player, god damn he’s still a player. And yet, I never behaved like that. So, one day after I was out with Benny at his house, I go to meet Wood at his place. I knock at his door. He opens it after a long time, and I see him with disheveled hair, no shirt on, and a naked girl behind him. And he says : “Who tf are ya, man?”

I didn’t even respond. I turned around and went away.

That day I had thought of fucking killing myself. I felt so heartbroken and I felt treated like a fucking toy. I got back home. I had cried all the road to my house. Once up to my bed room, I couldn’t fucking breath anymore. He had been treating me like shit for like forever and I had always respected him because he was my friend. I had his my feelings from everyone for three years because I didn’t want to break the relationship I had with him. And he treats me like shit?

I was panicking. I was in shock and so tired of life. I got up and started searching for weed but I didn’t have any. Or i couldn’t find any, I don’t know. But I remember going downstairs to the phone and calling Slater. He answered and I was crying and saying how I so needed weed and I couldn’t find any. He was so worried behind the phone, I could only imagine his confusion.

After not getting any solution to my problem, still crying and panicking I closed the phone.

I got to the kitchen and I was searching for something that even I didn’t know what. I get a knife from a drawer and I don’t know but I think I stabbed myself with it. And I screamed. I cried and I screamed.

I don’t know what happened after that. But I know that when I woke up, in front of me was Slater. He was fucking crying and on the phone. He was saying something but I couldn’t hear anything. I was dazy as shit.

After that day, I was a different person. Slater got closer to me. And he was always worried but I indulged to drugs and weed, getting my mind out of shit.

I started picking the friends I hung out with and the things I did. I couldn’t trust anyone anymore. And David Wooderson was nothing to me.

Only Slater knows what happened between me and Wood. All the others don’t know a thing. Or i think so. Slater might have told to Benny something about it because I noticed how Benny started ignoring Wood and talking about him.

How can a girl go through so much and still be alive? Only God knows it.

Katerina “Arrow” :

[borahaerhy]

Sorting the BTS Members into Hogwarts Houses bc I can

My credentials: I have two hyper fixations in my life, the only two things I actually care about, the only two things I spend all day and night thinking about and they are: Harry Potter and BTS.

Without further ado, here is how I would sort them

THERE ARE ONLY TWO THAT I AM CERTAIN OF, ONLY TWO THAT I AM ABSOLUTELY POSITIVE THAT THEY ARE IN THESE HOUSES AND THEY ARE: 

Jung Hoseok: Hufflepuff

Where tf else would he go

Sweetie pie

Chill

Always trying to be nice to everyone and make everyone seem loved and appreciated 

Possibly a stoner 

OBSCENELY humble and cool 

Mom Friend™

Min Yoongi: Slytherin

Smart as fuck

Knows what he’s good at and doesn’t need any validation whatsoever 

Not unwilling to cheat in order to win a game 

Along that note: Competitive 

EXTREMELY prideful in where he came from

Confident 

NOW AS FOR THE NEXT TWO, I AM FAIRLY CERTAIN ON WHAT HOUSE THEY WOULD BE PLACED IN, BUT I COULD SEE ARGUMENTS MADE FOR OTHERS. THEY ARE: 

Kim Seokjin: Gryffindor (?)

Cool Guy™

Funny, class clown type 

Studies well, but prefers to do just about anything else 

Competative, but moreso in theory

Like he goes to all the quidditch matches and screams so loudly for his team, and talks made shit on whoever they’re playing against, but would never actually play the sport. 

Overly Confident 

HOWEVER

I could literally see him being sorted into any of the houses and it making sense. 

Hufflepuff? 

Sure, he’s a chill guy. 

Prefers to spend his time relaxing rather than doing things

Has known how to sneak into the kitchens since first year, and does it almost nightly. 

Ravenclaw? 

Why not? He’s smart and works hard 

Dad jokes are basically cheesy riddles, so he can get into the common room no problem 

Would probably be studying anything other than what’s been assigned to him. 

Slytherin? 

He might not fit in perfectly, but the traits are there

Smart mouthed and overly confident 

Doesn’t need validation from anyone 

Competative - very okay with cheating/lying in order to win the game 

It’s all in the name of fun, right? 

He could be literally any of them bro idek at this point.

Kim Taehyung: Hufflepuff

All for chilling the fuck out

Sporatically hyper 

Also possibly a stoner 

Doesn’t like when others are left out 

LOVES ANIMALS 

Also class clown vibes but more like he just wasn’t paying attention and was accidentally funny when he was called on

BUT I could see the argument for Ravenclaw:

So smart bro 

Would have an absolute blast with the riddles 

Probably loves researching niche topics that have nothing to do with anything but he’d much rather know if polyjuice potion would give it’s user the same ailments as the person they’re becoming than complete the essay McGonogall assigned two weeks ago 

You can’t really tell if he's just really smart or a little crazy (affectionate) 

NOW, WE MOVE ONTO THE BANE OF MY EXISTANCE, FOR HE IS SPLIT DEADASS DOWN THE MIDDLE BETWEEN TWO HOUSES, AND I CANNOT FOR THE LIFE OF ME DECIDE WHICH ONE IS MORE ACCURATE. I PRESENT TO YOU: 

Park Jimin: Slytherin/Hufflepuff

He’s a Slytherin because: 

Smart, but make it mischievous 

Knows exactly how to get what he wants 

Very sure of himself 

C O M P E T A T I V E 

Get’s top grades and will tell everyone about it 

Generally not unwilling to cut a bitch 

But he’s a Hufflepuff because:

The most loyal and empathetic man to maybe have ever existed 

Will do anything to make his friends/loved ones happy 

There are more important things than academics (still gets top grades though)

Generally not unwilling to cut a bitch 

AND FINALLY, THIS LAST SECTION COULD’VE GONE INTO THE SECOND SECTION JUST FINE, BUT I’M PETTY AND DISAGREE WITH NAMJOON’S SORTING DECISIONS (that he made like 7 years ago) AND LIKE I CAN SEE HIS POINT BUT HE’S SO WRONG. FINALLY, AT LONG LAST, WE HAVE: 

Jeon Jungkook: Ravenclaw/Gryffindor 

He’s a Ravenclaw because: 

Very smart, and he definitely prides himself on it to some degree

A true Jack of all Trades 

Wants to be the best at everything, and is very willing to work towards getting it

Namjoon said he’d be a Ravenclaw (and who am I to argue with Joonie?) 

But he’s a Gryffindor because: 

Outwardly, he’s the most Gryffindor person you could get 

Competative 

Athletic 

Academically driven 

Popular Jock type 

A mischievous little shit 

Seriously, would make the Marauders proud 

But he would take the house cup so fucking seriously guys 

I cannot stress that enough 

If they lost even one of the years he attended Hogwarts

He’d never let it go. It would keep him up at night for years to come 

(And I feel like that’s a very Gryffindor trait)

(Turns out I’m very willing to argue with Joonie. Sorry, babe)

Note: Regardless of all of this, I think it'd would be hilarious if Jungkook was still sorted into Ravenclaw. He's just outwardly extremely Gryffindor, bringing complete chaos and unprecedented success to Ravenclaw that they haven't seen in centuries. 10/10 concept.

SPEAKING OF JOON: 

Kim Namjoon: Gryffindor/Ravenclaw 

He’s a Gryffindor Because: 

Outrageous amounts of leadership potential 

Because Namjoon said he’d be a Gryffin– damn I already made that joke

But he’s a Ravenclaw because: 

Do I really have to say it? 

The smartest person I’ve never met 

An actual genius 

Would get top grades but only because he’s smart so everyone expects him to 

Would much rather be researching literally anything else 

Animagi 

Unicorns

The Philosopher's Stone

Literally anything because he’s in a magic school and anything’s possible 

(He would also be muggleborn, but that’s more of my own headcannon)

Really couldn’t give a fuck less about Quidditch 

Or winning the house cup 

Wtf is house pride? I’m just here to read, man

ALSO, in my PROFESSIONAL OPINION, he would really fw Divination, and I generally just don't think Gryffindor's really do, because it's so theoretical.

If you have any other points that I've overlooked please let me know, I love talking about this kind of shit.