#why r u so mad shu yi :(

[justanotherlostkidyolo]

I am N O T ready for the second season of we best love,, my children :,,(( what happened to you why are you fightingggggg

[noona96n]

Shu Yi just wants to forgive Shi De

Shu Yi wants answers, yes, but it doesn’t matter what Shi De’s answers are bcs he’s already forgiven Shi De… he just. wants. Shi De. to. admit. his. fault.   (x)

before continuing (judging), pls read my stance on this scene

one question + many lies

the one thing Shu Yu wants from Shi De the most is answer, is for Shi De to admit the atrocity he committed (cheating on Shu Yi, which Shi De obviously didn’t but Shu Yi’s a fckn dumbass). 

in the 1st scene, Shu Yi was literally waiting for Shi De to put a label to their relationship. it’s as if he’s waiting for confirmation that he still has the privileges of calling Shi De out on his cheating ass 

in the 2nd scene, literally, right after this, Shi De says ‘i owe u for making u wait for 5yrs’ which wasn’t an admittance Shu Yi was looking for. he was waiting for Shi De to admit that he cheated on Shu Yi. and how do i know? bcs right after saying ‘5yrs’ Shu Yi immediately brought up the fact that he & his fake gf are going so well he’s introducing her to his dad 

Shu Yi’s always, always waiting for Shi De to address the digression of cheating on him when he was in America. 

so, yes, i do think the one thing Shu Yi wants most from Shi De is for an opportunity to forgive Shi De… the prospect of finally getting answers and finally be able to forgive Shi De is literally the one thing that keeps Shu Yi from going anywhere. 

Shi De says he’s sorry and mentions ‘America’ and Shu Yi’s eyes immediately go soft, his voice loses every remaining rage, the way he says Shi De’s name turns gentle, his subsequent demand is even gentler. heck, his hand stops gripping and turns soothing, his fingers reaching up to smooth Shi De’s anguish

he only gets angry again when Shi De becomes coy… “messes” with him. he even goes through the trouble of pretending to go to work just to get Shi De to go back to the reasonings again and then Shu Yi allows Shi De to drag him to the other couch thing bcs Shi De promises to give him answers. 

Shi De is literally violating him (apologies if this word is too rough but drop me a note if u can think of a better word bcs i can’t rn) and all Shu Yi can think about is the fckn reason why Shi De abandoned him and cheated on him.

he even says 'if u have ur reasons, then tell me’… he’s willing to let Shi De do whatever he wants as long as Shi De tells him the t r u t h but Shi De lies, and lies, and lies, by omission, with his kisses.

Shu Yi accepting Shi De’s lies

the heartbreaking thing is, Shu Yi kisses Shi De back the moment Shi De’s lips are on his. Shu Yi loves Shi De so, so much it physically hurts me to watch and this is why i said that Shu Yi loves Shi De so much he just can’t stay mad at Shi De… he’s literally waiting with bated breath for Shi De to apologize for his mistakes so he can go back to loving Shi De again without hating himself too much for loving Shi De beyond anything else.  ((x))

Shu Yi immediately kisses back the second Shi De’s lips are on his… no hesitation. 

he misses this, he misses Shi De, he wants this, he wants Shi De-

-but he also doesn’t want it at all.

he wants answers, he wants Shi De to stop keeping secrets, he wants Shi De to tell him the fckn truth; so that he can forgive Shi De and kisses Shi De back with all his mouth and loves Shi De again with all his heart. ((x))

‘if u have ur reasons, tell me,’ he practically begs, only to have his plea ignored with a kiss to the corner of his lips.

all he gets in return are lies by omission and, i think, in that moment, he’s resigned to not getting answers, he’s resigned to the fact that he still loves Shi De endlessly and immensely even if he’s not getting any answers.

once again, everything in their relationship are going to operating on Shi De’s terms (x)

Shu Yi is soft & pliant for Shi De only

it’s also fascinating how Shu Yi is still so soft and pliant for Shi De even when he’s mad as heck at Shi De. like, he’s more than capable to dragging & tossing Shi De around but he doesn’t. 

Shi De is drunk out of his mind rn and, if Shu Yi wants, i truly believe he could just push Shi De a bit more and Shi De would’ve tell him anything and everything.

Shi De cries and all the growling and roaring in Shu Yi mouth just… melt away. he doesn’t yell, not even once, even when he has every rights to, even when Shi De accused him of not knowing anything.

it’s as if seeing the person he loves most so broken and depressed kills all the rage within him.

the gentleness (x)

i do wonder… how many time has Shi De lightly tapped Shu Yi to calm him down? how often he did it? in what other situation did he do it? 

it’s such a… ‘learned’ action, as if he randomly finds out one day as he tried to sooth Shu Yi’s nerve, and he used it ever since… just to give Shu Yi a sense of comfort.

and comfort Shu Yi it did; Shu Yi just… melts. he’s instantly calm and docile, even leaning up to press his face closer to Shi De’s… and then he cried, as if he misses Shi De’s fingers against his skin, calming him down, as he lulls Shu Yi into a sense of security w/ his soft shushing & featherlight kisses

a hot mess of misunderstanding

another fascinating thing about this entire thing is that they’re operating on a whole bunch of misunderstandings:

Shu Yi wanting to know why tf Shi De cheated on him

Shi De not understanding that Shu Yi wants to know why he cheated on him (bcs Shi De didn’t freaking cheat on him) and presuming that Shu Yi wants to know why he ghosted Shu Yi

Shu Yi presuming that Shi De can’t tell him about the other woman (there’s no other woman u dumbass) when it’s actually Shi De not being able to break whatever promise he made to Shu Yi’s dad

Shi De wanting to know why tf Shu Yi’s messing w/ him

Shu Yi not knowing that Shi De knows about his scheme so he assumes Shi De’s just playing games w/ him and fckn w/ his head on top of cheating on him

one last remark

just bcs Shi De’s ass is naked on the daybed & Shu Yi is a condescending ass in the morning doesn’t mean they had sex the night before. Shu Yi’s out to break Shi De’s heart… do you think he’s incapable of stripping Shi De naked and lying that they had sex? 

also, sometimes, men can’t get hard when they’re drunk lol like they just can’t get an erection or maintain it if they do get one. it’s a thing called ‘whiskey dick’ lol google it. (also, Shi De’s ass clearly has never been drunk out of his mind before if he thinks he can have sex when he was that drunk lol )

do i think they make out until Shi De passed out or vomit? fckn yes. does that make the noncon kissing okay? NOPITY NOPE.

the eng sub in the vid is translated from the jpn sub provided by RakutenTV

SY 一体何なんだ。 SY いい加減にしろよ ガオ シードー。 SY 聞こえないのか？ SD ごめん。アメリカへ… 行くべきじゃなかった。許してくれ。（the actual Chinese words Shi De used was ‘sorry’ but i really like how the jpn translation opted for ‘forgive me’） SD チャンスが欲しい。イチからやり直せないか。 SY アメリカで何があったんだ。こたえろよ。 SY 一体 何があった？ SD 教えてくれ なせなんだ？ SY 嫌がらせのつもりか、 ガオ シードー？ SD それは君だろ。 SY どういう意味だ？ SD 君は何も知らない。（pls, this phrase has such a ‘you know nothing, jon snow’ vibe lol） SD 君は幸せな人だよ。ずっと 守られている。 SD どこへ？ SY 仕事に行く。 SD 知りたいだろ。 SD 何も感じないのか？ SY もう。 SY ガオ シードー ふざけるな。ガオ シードー。 SY 理由があるなら 言えよ。