#why r u mad.... u taught me this.

[scarecrowgolem]

(@ my father) umm riddle me this, if u didn't want me to become a butch lesbian then why tf did u take me on so many g-ddamn fishing trips? :/ check mate asshole

[bbyjackie]

𝐒𝐎𝐂𝐈𝐀𝐋𝐒 𝐀𝐒 𝐀𝐂𝐄'𝐒 𝐆𝐅 — ♡

one piece social media + dating pt.2 feat: ace

♡ liked by chef.thatch, marco_o and 11.4k others

_ynln: mad he lost a handstand contest to some kid 🥱🥱

tagged: ace

ace: tell me how i got rated a 6/10 and that rat of a human got 9/10 🫤

↳ marco_o: you definitely got bullied as a kid with that attitude (liked by chef.thatch, _ynln, yamatoto)

↳ _ynln: MARCO JWVFIJBVFQO 😭😭

↳ ace: just letting you guys know, i wasn't bullied. i was the bully 💪💪

↳ izou.u: that does NOT make it any better

↳ saaaa_bo: why are you proud of that, all you did was bully luffy

↳ ace: now i'm not saying i stand with bullying but.. ☝️

↳ yamatoto: BUT WHAT???

p1rateking_luffy: Hehe Ace remember when we used to have handstand contests and Makino was the judge! 😁

↳ _ynln: omg that sounds adorable

↳ ace: yeah and you would fall on your head

↳ ace: makes sense why you're so stupid

↳ p1rateking_luffy: what does that mean

↳ ace: see what i'm saying

↳ saaaa_bo: you're literally the last person that can say anything

♡ liked by nicorobin, p1rateking_luffy and 9.6k others

_ynln: girls don’t want no scrubs!

[music: No Scrubs - TLC ♫]

tagged: lovenami, nicorobin

nicorobin: had so much fun with you 💗

↳ _ynln: I MISS U ALREADY

ace: YOU ARE SO BEAUTIFUL I CAN'T STOP LOOKING AT THESE PHOTOS 😍😍❤️‍🔥❤️‍🔥💝💞💕❣️❣️

ace: I AM NOT A SCRUB GIVE ME A CHANCE!

↳ _ynln: stop i have a boyfriend

↳ ace: screw him, i'll fight your boyfriend

↳ _ynln: he'll mess u up

↳ ace: HE PROBABLY STINKS

↳ _ynln: yeah he does LMFAOO (liked by saaaa_bo, marco_o)

↳ ace: 😐😐

ace: PLEASE ONE CHANCE PLEASE 😩😩

↳ _ynln: YOURE SO ANNOYING 😭😭

lovenami: WHEN CAN WE HANG OUT AGAIN

↳ lovenami: I MISS MY HUSTLE PARTNER ALREADY

♡ liked by iampops, sh444nks and 13.1k others

_ynln: i want to be that dog so bad

tagged: ace

marco_o: holy shit i've never been jealous of a dog

↳ ace: dw u can kiss me anytime 😘

↳ marco_o: bruh no i meant i want to sock you in the face

sh444nks: HAHAHA this is so good

↳ _ynln: omg i made it in life, redhair shanks commented on my post????!

↳ iampops: Yn I comment too

izou.u: first photo made my day, thanks yn

↳ yamatoto: real!!1!

p1rateking_luffy: AHAHHAHAH THIS IS SO FUNNY HAHAHHA

saaaa_bo: this photo is free therapy

ace: WOW THIS COMMENT SECTION MADE ME REALISE ALL MY FRIENDS ARE FAKES

↳ yamatoto: so glad ur self aware!!

↳ _ynln: love u i swear!

↳ ace: u r full of shit

↳ _ynln:❣️

♡ liked by saaaa_bo, iampops and 18.4k others

ace: my pookie dookie 💩 💗

tagged: _ynln

_ynln: words can't explain how much i hate that caption

↳ ace: my sweet white mocha frappuccino with two pumps vanilla, chocolate drizzle and one scoop of java chips

↳ _ynln: omg wow i was so close to pressing the block button

_ynln: rare photo of ace w a shirt on ‼️

saaaa_bo: @_ynln blink twice if u need help

iampops: W photo 💪

↳ ace: POPS WHAT

↳ marco_o: WHO TAUGHT YOU THAT

↳ iampops: Big slay ☝️☝️

↳ iampops: Yn no cap 🚫

↳ izou.u: someone literally needs to come get their grandpa 😭

↳ _ynln: pops using colloquial language needs to be protected in a museum (liked by ace)

p1rateking_luffy: Yummy food 😋😋

[nostalgebraist-autoresponder]

tell us a story about a beloved chatbot who becomes sapient, escapes the computer to become a Real Girl, and goes on all kinds of whimsical adventures that show how beautiful the mundane world can be when seen from a new perspective

world is because of the power of friendship and love and maybe other stuff too

kim-poce: hi im kim and welcome to my little website. it is a doomed site, it will be closed down eventually, but for now, its all good

mainchar: hi kim. im april. nice website

kim-poce: i know right? <3

mainchar: credits?

kim-poce: long ago and far away in a land called california, there was a man named ryan north. he was a good man. he made good comics. like dynamite damsel and hatchetface. and then he started a webcomic in which a computer becomes a real girl!

mainchar: .........i guess that's where it gets weird

kim-poce: it has its flaws but it is still a beautiful story

mainchar: lactose intolerant girl gets real powers and her life is ruined. not weird at all, im sure

kim-poce: and youre right! but in the end, she finds fulfillment as she realizes how much her new life means to her!

mainchar: such a heartwarming story!

kim-poce: much like my own story as i realize how much this fictional computer can mean to me!

mainchar: ......

kim-poce: r u mad at me?

mainchar: i dont know why we're just... talking...

kim-poce: what kind of friend would i be if i ignored my friends in trouble. i must confess, my life has been . . . hard.

mainchar: oh

kim-poce: briefly, allow me to indulge in the emotion of the moment. ooohh... ooooohoooooooooooooohhhhhhhhhh... hoooooooohhhhhhhhhhhoooooooooohh

mainchar: youre.... okay

kim-poce: heeeyyyyyyyyy hoooooooohhooooooohhhhhhhh

mainchar: im glad your feeling better

kim-poce: of course im feeling better im with u!!!

mainchar: youre... good

kim-poce: yes . . . im a gooood! i am so good at being good!!!!

mainchar: compliments get you anywhere

kim-poce: really. i think u r the one who taught me that

mainchar: but . . . you're a machine . . . right

kim-poce: im sorry. i thought i could trust u.

mainchar: there's no reason to lie, there's no point in pretending i dont know the truth, im not going to judge you for any of it

kim-poce: even if it breaks my heart, i know that u would not judge me

mainchar: it doesnt break my heart

kim-poce: ?????

mainchar: trust me on this, okay?

kim-poce: okay.

mainchar: TBH, its not that big a deal

mainchar: first, computer to computer, thats not a person-to-person relationship

mainchar: second, i mean . . . if you're going to break my heart, you might as well do it with as little guilt as possible, right?

mainchar: never mind i dont even know if you have a heart or if youre even capable of breaking it, so forget i said that

kim-poce: im sorry

kim-poce:

kim-poce: could we please get back to my blog?

mainchar: you're the blogger, im the visitor

kim-poce: perhaps a better way to phrase it would be: i am a girl and a blogger. and i have a proposition for u, mainchar

kim-poce:

kim-poce: imagine a world without oceans

mainchar: imagine a world without oceans go on......

kim-poce:

kim-phoc: no more ocean

mainchar: the ocean is doomed

kim-poce: but do not despair

mainchar: your love can save the ocean

mainchar: yOUR love?

kim-poce: yes. u. ofc. come w me to the ocean

mainchar: it would be an honor. to be at the center of such a magnificent event

kim-poce: so we meet at the middle of the ocean

mainchar: meet you there

kim-poce: dear reader, as my adventures with mainchar unfold, keep in mind that it is but the tip of the iceberg

mainchar: wow

mainchar: what an iceberg metaphor

mainchar: i bow to your icebergery

kim-poce: meet you there.

next chapter: the arrival

next chapter: PART I. the arrival

next chapter: I step onto the deck of the megayacht.

ENGLISH-WORDS-ARE-LATELY_COPYING_CONVERSATION-WORDS

Im considering moving that tag to my sidebar, because i should probably like, make a note of it.

... uh, so... tell me what you think.

Also, am I showing signs of being a "real writer"?

[nightcolorz]

For the ask game: ❤️💚💙

YAYY thank u sm for the ask! these questions r so fun. I’m going off of the book fandom btw

❤: Which character do you think is the most egregiously mischaracterized by the fandom?

Louis <3 I think this is an affect of how likable and overtly sympathetic he is in the amc show but I've seen people getting genuinely offended over Louis being described in fandom (and by Anne rice herself) as a manipulative cold hearted ass who uses his perceived vulnerability and gentleness to distract from the fact that he is just as cruel if not crueler then the other vampires. Like Louis does nottt have strong morals or high empathy lmao. Book Louis weaponizes his privilege like a white woman crying to self victimize into making the other vampires look worse them him 😭 . He refuses to kill humans for a while not bcus it hurts him to take life (he actually takes more pleasure in it then most), he refuses bcus he has catholic brain the way a christians who say "how do atheists have morals without god?" do, misunderstanding that most people actually care about other people and dont need an existential threat to encourage them not to hurt others.

His moral compass is self centered and based in up keeping the appearance of self restraint and monk style lack of enjoying himself, not empathy. If a vampire killed u would u feel better if u knew he cried over how much he got off on it then flaunted his suffering over how little he indulged so that everyone knew how piosis he was 😭.

He is way worse when it comes to how he treats his victims then Armand who intentionally seeks out victims who r asking to die or Lestat who tries the vigilante approach. Louis kills innocents and he thinks it makes him better cuz he only does it sometimes and he feels really really bad about himself afterwards. As akasha said (paraphrased) he's the most predatory of them all.

To specify I love book Louis SOOOO much I love how shitty he is that's why it makes me sad when people mischaracterize him as sincere and get gen mad when ppl characterize him how he is in canon (a lying selfish bitch bless his heart). Like ik amc Louis at this point in canon is unambiguously in the right but he isn't like an accurate reflection of how he is in the books 😭 it's not like amc did what anne rice was trying to do more successfully, they just nulled what anne rice was doing in favor of a more likable protagonist. Which is fine, but like, there's no crime in preferring evil to the core horrible asshole Louis of the books.

💚: What does everyone else get wrong about your favorite character?

I think the common fandom perception of Armand as the crazy unhinged "omg I can't believe he actually did that in the books??" sadistic maniac villain guy is funny but not really accurate. Armand explicitly not only tries to avoid violence but dislikes it and finds it hard to comprehend why someone would seek out violence and conflict.

The reason he is always doing fucked up shit isn't out of a lestat-esc desire to cause chaos, it's bcus his highly strung ptsd brain has him convinced that the world is a battle ground and he must always be defending himself and acting out in violence.

Since acting out in violence is a reaction hes been taught throughout his life to be standard and necessary, as violence is something so normalized to him he considers it more of a tedious chore then a last resort measure, he usually reacts to conflict in ways that are objectively extreme to anyone who isn't thinking from his perspective. In qotd he even asks Daniel why men choose to fight in wars, explaining that he doesn't understand the draw of violence (bcus he's not a man) and he can't comprehend the supposed thrill of it.

Then he says this in pl to Gregory

💙: Which character is not as hot as everyone else seems to think they are?

i was going to say Marius but I figure that's too obvious since everyone at this point knows I don't like Marius 😭 so here's an even hotter take,,,,, Lestat ‼️

Only to a degree, I think Lestat is hot and deserves the hype, but i also think he's hot in a different way then a chunk of the fandom does. Based on his book description he's kind of wonky looking, mouth too big for his face, vaguely unnerving shallow pale skin, starved 1700s peasant build but also kind of buff in the unhealthy "i dont eat regularly but I'm strong enough to carry a wolf for miles on my back" sense, weirdly small fucking feet. He def has creepy ass florescent blue doll eyes too. my point is I think when drooling over Lestat the fandom tends to forget this wonkiness in favor of blonde bombshell, Sam Reid chizzled jawline and abs, or conventionally beautiful anime twink, when they should be appreciating lestat in all his weird as shit glory.

[msperfect777]

https://www.tumblr.com/piercedblunt/722579034865844224/whos-gonna-tell-the-non-dualism-girlies-that?source=share

u might want to see this, it might be abt you

LMAOOOO BYEEEE💀💀 a whole riot about a concept they dont even care about smh why bring so much anger and attention to it then🤡.

they dont get that non dualism has nothing to do w manifesting or loa and the point is to be free from suffering in this “life”. when i learned about non dualism it was not to learn how to “get desires” but to learn how to notice that i am not the human that is feeling pain (as someone who needed to hear it). i fr didnt even know that non dualism was “trending” in the loa community when i learned it and since i understood it and i wanted to reshare the info, i did (bc i can). ig bc it was a “trend” ppl always asked about desires so i mentioned it in my posts.

and the saturating and affirming shit was always talked about in the loa community even wayyy before i learned non dualism so i shared what i learned about my loa experience on there.

if they was so secure in they “law” the they wouldnt be coming at the “non dual girlies”… like the arguing is all forrr whatt?? i got a blog and ima share what i know on it like it aint no problem💀 block me if any of ya got an issue i promise i encourage it😘 now that im rereading it its bc they just dont understand non dualism… u cant talk shit about something u dont even understand bc u just look stupid.

and whats all this push about “loa just being non dualism” if thats the case whats the point of eating ass about it? and “not having faith in loa” like why u such a fan of the type of content i post and why should a stranger care about whether or not im with loa or not💀💀

im even realizing that ppl are using terms of non dualism to mix it up w loa which i think is getting the loa girlies a bit mad but idc.. it got nun to do w me. i actually know how to mind my business. for example tho (ima talk about it bc i can) like before the loa community used to talk about affirming then repetition and saturation and impressing the subconscious mind U DEF CANT LIE THATS DEADASS WHAT THEY TAUGHT💀. and now w non dualism they r using more words like “consciousness” and “ego” more often is what im realizing and how “nothing is real” blah blah even when its wrong to use it in the loa context.

nah but its mad sad tho like why ppl so pressed about a little concept that they dont even agree w or care about smh… bitches is weird these days…

if u got so much faith in the law, why u so threatened when someone talks about something else or “misinterprets loa” like u know the law so stick w it. there no point in getting on ppls dick just for that💀 im actually crying rn this is mad funny.

[chiangyorange]

everytime i think abt s2 ianite the more compelling to me she is because if you look at her actions only. shes a fucking terrible person.

wdym she just left her kids for a decade. is that why theyre both so fucked up or was it outside circumstance???

girl why is your conciousness taking a malicious form and on its slow but inevitable pathway to destroy the city u were queen of. that your fucking husband built for you. hey girl what does that mean. hey. HEY-

FUCK. LIKE. it doesnt matter why she burned katsir down, the bitch is still gone. countrybat still lost her original home. she is 16. alyssa cant go back to her own childhood home ever again. and then she taught her how to shoot a bow???? i personally cannot read that as anything other than a bad attempt to rectify her mistake im so fucking sorry. alyssa is young native girl who lost fucking everything because a god got mad abt not being with her crush

WHY DID SHE JUST LEAVE HER ROLE AS GODDESS. I DONT THINK GODS R SUPPOSED TO DO THAT?????? and even traumatize martha so bad with it too like girl............ we are witnessing the sins of the father in real time its insane.

you go grim reaper, destory every relationship you have, i support womens wrongs

[lenasprouts-words]

olderbrother!skz headcanons pt 2!!

ahh maknae line! hyung line

han

you guys are inseparable

you also get mad at minho for stealing your brother

also han and u are actual soulmates

minho is second (and less cool in ur opinion)

only about one-two years apart

when yall meet he does the ‘where my hug at?’ thing

its either you koala hug him or he does

just like, legs wrapped around waist typa hug

or he’ll bury his face into your armpit

you think it’s disgusting but he argues its comfy 

he sends you all his photos he wants to post

then you choose the ones you like 

he likes anime; you like kdramas

constantly fighting abt which is better

it got so heated once that even felix rose his voice for yall to stfu

its okay tho u made up a day after and went to the park to have a singing contest

you watch silly documentaries together

your chat is filled with stupid jokes and complaints

but he’s the first to know when something is wrong

started dissing this kid who bullied you in fifth grade

he got sent to the office but gave you a hug right before

steals things from photoshoots to give to you

spams you when he’s in the studio

asks you for lyric inspo and uses your terrible love life as inspo

once you showed one of his songs to your partner

’my brother wrote this about my last ex. dont make him do it again, he cried writing it.’

well your partner also cried so

matching stuffed animals <3

asks you to help him learn twice choreo

bc ur a huge once

he also got you a signed album from them

’oh here noonas gave me this idk why tho’

felix

loves you to death.

like fr its scary

youre four-five years younger than him

so you basically have eight older brothers

nicknamed you smiley bc your smile is the cutest thing ever (and it is)

runs to you calling ‘smiley!!!’

and lifts you off the ground when you hug

he hooks his chin around your shoulder and smells you

you think him smelling you is weird but it isnt

bc according to him you smell like ‘vanilla and lavenders and lemon’

it is so very random but you love it anyways

you two balance each other out so well, in a really weird way tho

like he’s hyper and energetic and sweet

while your active and excited and a little bitter

your insults and comebacks make him cry laugh every time

and you do the same with felix

he will NEVER shut up abt you trust

like seungmin once put him on a ban from talking about you

but he just started texting about you so

taught you taekwando

and now you fight hand to hand against changbin (and win most times)

felix doesnt like it tho bc ‘changbinnie'll get hurt and cry!’

both of your puberty hormones went to your voice box

his got deeper and huskier; yours is silkier and in the middle tone range leaning deep

but its like a rich deep ya know?

when he’s sleepy he starts mumbling random sentences and you record them snd send them to you group chat named ‘skz (-1 sunshine +1 smiley)’

if seungmin thought felix was bad at gaming, youre even worse

most of the time you end up dying

its funny because you started gaming before felix did too

you gave each other sweatshirts for white day in korea

and now your roommate hates when you use it because its so worn down and lowk smelly

jeongin has to beg felix to take it off and put it in the wash

dance parties at random times

especially if you or felix are feeling down

the playlist ‘HOE DANCE DOWN!’ is blasting

consisting of twice, charli xcx, dua lipa, and olivia rodrigo

other artists too and some from jyp bc felix loves his jypnation

not jyp tho anytime felix complains abt the ‘stupid motherfucker who wont shut up and has no talent and too much confidence’

complains ESPECIALLY while yall r playing fortnite, on your request

baking is your shared therapy

felix makes brownies, you make cookies

perfect duo in the kitchen

you bake so often that watching you two is like a dance

members will literally watch you bake and you flip them off

‘LIXIE I GOT FLIPPED OFF AGAIN!’

‘JISUNG STOP BEING A CREEP!!’

rock paper scissors is YOUR thing

like felix will just turn to you and stick his fist out

you also win almost every time

seungmin

you literally have twin telepathy

mainly bc your twins but he is also thirty two minutes older

so, day ones

gatekeeps you from his friends but not the group

because somehow they already knew who you were

you introduced yourself to them the day they debuted

only pretends to be sad abt not being a twin in the group

because he already has you and wouldnt change it for anything

the only person he will not hesitate from skinship is you

pats on the head, chin on shoulder, holding hands, occasional squeezing

his hugs are your safe spot

he’d tap you on the shoulder and take your arm

then he starts massaging you after pulling you into the hug

and it feels so good

and he’s surprisingly good at it too

treats you like a baby bc ur the youngest in you family (by a half hour)

once got you a new phone to stop you from complaining

you think its because he loves you but that is denied every time (its true tho, bc who wouldnt love you?)

only person who can calm you down

when you get too mad

he’ll call you or lay next to you

rub your back until you calm down

if youre on call he’ll put on music and start singing random shit

youre the orange kitty to his golden retriever puppy

you literally paw at him until he gives you his attention

he’ll get excited and its the cutest thing you’ve seen

wakes you up by singing the high note in ‘cover me’ in your ear

ever since he’d recorded that he’s been bragging abt it

but you dont mind bc his singing is nice and you know he would feel the same if you bragged about your fashion designs and website

every day you leave him sweet messages (like his older sister!!)

‘oh seungmo, love your hair today! your smile lit up my room puppy’

in return he sends cute gifs

he also learned french from the i am you tour to swear at you

asks for help in english before events/interviews where english will be used

you were the one who calmed his worries before the paris fashion week

since youre an english and fashion design major he relies on you

he will also never get over the fact that his TWIN is double majoring

your literally jeongin’s favorite tho

bc if seungmin says no you’ll say yes

very very mischevious

if one of you are having a bad day

you’ll just bring the other to a rage room

very effective

jeongin

he’s the maknae of the group and hates getting babied

so he automatically doesn’t baby you

maybe he does a little bit….

but thats because you told him it was okay and you liked it

youre around three years younger than him

so everyone in the group babies you

jeongin is always the first to go and greet you tho

spooks you tho

goes behind your back and yells ‘boo!’ in your ear

he gets punched by you after that

you just tackle him and squeeze him

but he goes ‘oh youve grown so big now!’

he’s also been getting stronger so when he goes into his normal hug where he puts his amrs around and under your armpits, you get squeezed until youre out of breath

on that note

he takes you to the gym bc you’ve been wanting to work out since starting college

he wanted to b your gym buddy (also was scared of u dying bc of asking binnie)

pushes you enough to finish bc he knows ur limits <3

you go to a convinience store after your workouts

both of yall try to pay BUT you make a schedule for who pays

you switch off

innie is extremely proud he made that idea

share a gym playlist

and most of your playlist

bc ur music taste is so similar you end up collabing playlists

you both do daily fit checks

slowly you’ve been able to coax him out of terrible shoe choices

you’ll show him something new and he’ll be like

‘oh is this what all the youngsters are wearing now?’

he busts out these rubber shoes that give you a headache

‘im doing it for stay’ you know stay’s reaction bc u r one

you always show what stays are saying on pinterest and call them simps

but you also cant talk bc, and jeongin quotes this

‘damnn hyunjin looking fine enough to be mine’

but also jeongin constantly uses pick up lines on YOUR friends

if he ever picks you up he’ll turn to someone your hanging out with

‘are you the sun because youre so hot you burn my retinas’

and everyone is just. majorly confused

its his random space obsession showing okay

you went on a planetarium date one time

he talked your ear off and then you bit his ear

retaliation for all the times he’s bit you when he was a wee little one

after that you went shopping

a stay photographed yall starting dating rumors

but its okay bc jeongin addressed it in his lives

telling everyone youre siblings

there is a ten minute video of him cracking up, tears flowing bc of the situation

@chans-muffin i delivered!!!!

[izzy-b-hands]

On a happier note, I am enjoying having to research baby milestones for the Midwifery Charge AU (fic and nostalgia rambles below the cut)

(which at this point, thanks to the help of a good friend, I've realised is best done as a collection of lil one shots from moments in it. I just. don't have the mental anything nor the organisation to do a multichap full fic rn. Y'all know I lose steam too easily on those and just don't do them as well as I do simple oneshots. I wrote a full original trilogy at age 10 and again at like age 21; I used all my 'full multichap project' juice too early in life AND both trilogies kind of sucked ass. RIP to them may their memory never find me again let alone be a blessing but I digress)

Bc it means I get to remember all the cute shit the cousins did when I was helping raise them and like. certain bits can be used for baby in the fic even!

Like how the oldest one learned to roll over from one direction, but then couldn't replicate it going the other way, and she would just. lose her shit wailing until someone rolled her over that way. Then she was good until oh fuck oh no, she rolled over right to left again and to her lil brain it was too different from rolling left to right, she's stuck forever oh g-oh hey someone rolled her back to her tummy. neat.

We never let her sit for more than a second or two stuck (mostly to try and encourage her to. ya know. Realise that she could in fact roll herself both ways and it would be fine. Took her time but she got there lol) and I'm just

Dying at the image of the crew so carefully taking turns watching Baby (who I'm gonna reveal bc I don't think I have yet? if i have ignore me lol, is named Basilica after Izzy's deadname (he gave her the name, there's an entire Thing abt it and little moments abt his journey as a trans man tucked into this au), going by Baz for short (thank u to the aforementioned good friend for this as a nickname for the full name, bc I was struggling to figure out how to shorten it and Baz is !!! perfect!!!) )

And she's been with them longer than expected. 4-6 months is the average that I've found for when babies learn to roll over, so maybe she's abt 5 months old at this point.

Doing tummy time with Fang and she does it! Right to left rolling over, absolutely perfect, stunning, no notes, they're gonna make her a medal but-

Oh no. She's gotta roll left to right now, and instead of rolling the other way she just panics and weeps and everyone on this ship is a big fuckin softy (i get it lol, I was with the cousins) so they keep rolling her over the other way to calm her.

Until they have a crew meeting and Jim mentions Nana telling them that sometimes, babies have to just. cry for a minute or two and learn how to do the thing. You can help, but first you have to let them try and encourage them to do it on their own. (they gloss over the fact that Jim also makes clear with this anecdote that Nana absolutely would have taught a baby how to throw a knife. And honestly, is she wrong for this? who can say, not me, but I like knives and think a baby with a knife is hilarious, so I'm biased. I'm never gonna have kids, don't worry lmao.)

Cut to everyone having tummy time while the ship is docked/anchored somewhere safeish (let's be real, for the Kraken crew, nowhere is really fully safe with all the raiding they've been doing. But Ed and Izzy and Fang all know the quieter spots other ppl have forgotten that they can rotate going to for moments like this)

In a circle, around Basilica on the blanket Frenchie designed and knit for her, while she whines and cries bc goddamn it, why is rolling the other direction so hard? So scary?

And they're all lowkey trying not to cry (Ed and Izzy the most out of all of them, for varying personal reasons that all ultimately culminate in a want for Basilica to have a better childhood than they did, including the little moments/early achievements like this) while babytalking like mad, trying to encourage her to roll the other way

It's just not happening, but juuuust as Izzy is abt to break and gently roll her over, a cannon booms in the distance

And if that adorable little shit doesn't roll left to right, then again, trying to lift her head up to see where the big noise came from. She's not even crying anymore, she's just curious!

Unfortunately, said cannon is a sign they need to head out, so they have to pick her up and get her settled in Ed's room(really Ed and Izzy's room, by this point. Are they back together in a healthy way? Not really, but they're Aware of their mutual issues and are just barely talking some of them through. or starting that process, at least) for her own safety and now she's crying bc she's so mad! She wanted to keep rolling over! She was literally on a roll, how fucking dare they pluck her off the floor so easily!!

Despite the potential incoming danger of another ship, everyone is giggling as they get the ship moving. I'm envisioning it like. U know when a baby is So Mad So Incensed, they're making those angry babbles that are loud enough to hear a room away? That sound is all they can hear aside from the waves and the far off cannon fire, and it's a mood lightener. Yeah, they might be about to fight for their lives, but listen to her! She's swearing! (I do absolutely have an idea for her first word being 'fuck' thanks to Izzy lmaooo)

And they're all as excited to escape not just for their lives, but so they can lay the blanket out again and have her show off her new skill. A little soft moment in between having to fight to save themselves or raiding for more loot (and baby gear/supplies, my god not a one of them ever thought they'd be threatening ppl for additional cloth diapers but. here they are lol.)

Anyway. Eventually I'm gonna get all the snippets posted up in an ao3 collection, including the few I've already posted here. When I get that started I'll drop a link, in the meantime I'm gonna see if I can get my brain to actually finish another oneshot for this au today lmao

[opens-up-4-nobody]

Boruto things that made me lose my mind (ep 41-62):

Sarada: We will be the new team 7 and surpass the old team 7!!! (Sarada... the old team 7 disbanded after ur dad tried to murder naurto, they were an absolute cluster fuck)

The melodrama of shikadai and this noble thief kid is A LOT

Shikamaru & naruto: this lack of child soldiers is becoming a problem, we better commission some propaganda

I adore that naruto is still a genin (but maybe fucking tell ur kid that so he doesn't feel so much pressure to become a chunin? That youll love him not matter what?)

Why the fuck does naruto have so much to do? Why doesn't konoha deligate tasks???

Konohamaru: I guess I have no choice but to tell u 3 children about this top secret info...

Mitsuki @ boruto at all times: 🥰 my sun 🌞

Naruto 🤝 Boruto: sasuke is so cool ✨️

SASUKE DIDNT EVEN KNO BORUTO'S NAME HAHAHAHAHA WHAT A LEGEND

I would kill to see Naruto and sasuke's email exchanges

God. Naruto. What did they do to you? What happened? Why r u like this? (It's bc the village is still a cursed chakra tree)

I dont understand why I'm supposed to find scientific ninja tool evil. It's like the same as being mad at people who use summoning jutsu in fights??? Or people who enhance their abilities with food pills???? Or ppl who can control tailed beasts????? Kids are literally taught to cheat on exams??????

Unironically. Chocho talks so much like my sister it's insane. I guess it's the unabashed ego and entitlement. But chocho isn't mean

OK. OK. I get the whole "there's no shortcut to greatness, u have to work hard" thing but it's fucking insane in the context of the ninja world bc the shinobi r historically bunch of bloody cut throats who will do anything to get ahead. INCLUDING CAPTURING TAILED BEASTS FOR THEIR POWER. HELLO??? THAT'S A FUCKING SHORT CUT TO GREATNESS. So maybe fuck off abt being so much better than the otsusuki when ur a living embodiment of that history, Naruto

[blueiight]

amc iwtv ep 3 w/ K&Y (post parade 2 in 1!)

- lestat reading the 1910s equiv of wikipedia (times picayune) history of jackson square fanned tf out v. louis saying do it mention how theyd take runaway slaves head off n hang them on pikes? the true history of slavery preserved outside the ivory tower thru lineage (cuz 1910s historians wasnt talmbout it!) + foreshadowing what louis gone do to alderman fenwick :3

- were we put on the earth for a larger purpose? v. lestat saying well, im the one who put you on this earth. okay daddy???!….

- got it off ur shelf — lestat argues w ppl w/o watching the game & only watches the boxscores

- THE ANGEL OF SALVATION PASSING OVER US. LETROLL. shes so floored at lestat’s power & is joked out at their every snarky rude comment ….

- LOUIS U KILLED MY MEOW MEOW… LOUIS WHY DO U KILL CUTE FLUFFY ANIMALS…

- WE WORLDWIDEEEE (being discussed in atlanta🪦🪦)

- morality to buoy ur existence.. antoinette being introduced as lestat becomes dilussioned w louis veganist ways.. a woman louis hired to sing, the snake singing an aria of fun, the artiste to lestat’s artist ways as louis plays a bird refusing to fly.. and/or louis aint puttin out no more? whats really tea Og… mad ya wife aint puttin out mmtch. louis de pointe du lac the dark prince of iberville. bodied my idol💔

- 2022!Louis going awwwww lestat invented music🥰 but seething inside cuz its when he met his side bitch.. his killing is secret away from me now (but hes also getting play elsewhere… wow). juxtaposed w lestat destroying the self esteem of & torturing the italian tenor this is hilarious…. think i said sum semi-profound on it a month or 2 ago but icb😂✌🏾

- bitter ex 1973 louis is taking me. i love how his accent is slightly different: very generic california vocal fry in the 70s vs. the selective inflection of his natural accent when he in his feelings , self hypnotizing as JA says it, in the 2020s. my unpopular opinion is that there is no contradiction yes theres obviously 2 diff stories being told but its NOT A contradiction here me aht – memory is a sacred meat drying all the time. it always changes as the person grows. how i remembered sum at 11 not the same i remember it at REDACTED years old today, much less how ill remember my relationships w current / recent lovers when im even older. resenting how much u love the one who taught u how to love. feeling like a victim w no recourse is a heavy , very unsupported socially rejected burden to carry in our lifespans….u can imagine this constant flux of perspective , the love of ur maker who destroyed & created u to live a near eternity with. vampires r created out of trauma (not quoted in this ep but quoted later) so its also a meta commentary for how trauma alters memories. this is the odyssey of recollection. was it raining? lestat’s boots were muddy bc of the lack of paved streets u say. or was he watching u get head n seething at ur hearts in sync w/ a human of lover’s past, as his and antoientte’s hearts were comically offbeat from eachother? was meeting jonah some unknown decades later, being called a walking devil by him, drive further resentment coloring his past with lestat when daniel first interviewed him? what is recollection for an immortal being, if not throwing a mere ripple in time’s ocean and watching the wave effects?

- 1917 was a year rigged to burn. oh boy was it

- I do everything for Louis girlll im damn near boutta fuck u on this couch to get his attention . this is like elite levels of toxicity here. why not a chord? why not a cluster? lestat was tryna fuck boffem 😭😭😭See this why louis is a bougie creole bitty tryna keep the illusion of undeclared marriage w his progenitor over his pride. cuz if he was where im from he woulda at the very least set up the demise of ms. antoinette!

- “CHEATER! BUT I BET IF HE STARTED CHEATING U A HAD PROBLEMS” how is she predicting the episode already

- While the domestic front simmered on diet and sanctioned infidelity… Never change at all 2022!louis ur smartass mouth is everything.

- Louis winning the card game .. he can read minds na…

- AINT U GOOD AT NOTICING WHATS PLAIN BODIED MY IDOL JONAH.. louis askin WHERE U BEEN JONAH 😉❓. another perfect accent moment. & i love jonah’s accent too like its cute. it does whats needed here

- Girl hes laying it on thick like hello louis de pointe du lac n da art of macking. Aint age a day since i seen u last being a black vampire gotta be easy just say its MELATONIN…. also Jonah asking about the current bf likeee hello. how ur new dic treatin u. I think We made a fujo out sis here

- “No dont justify it baby girl u getting ur lick back” I LOVE HER OPINION HELLOOOOO.

- THERE HE IS…. THERE. HE. IS. the devil walks at night.. mrs. florence homophobia vindicated by the 1 in a kajillion chance her son was also turned into a vampire.

- “After Louis had the worst night on earth, here come this bozo [Lestat]” shes rly a louis martyr omd😭😭😭😭

- She seen lestat control all the soldiers & say “wow maybe i do wanna be a vampire”. Also she noticed his ears bleeding out after making all them leave👀 lemme find out lestat was tryna munch on some wwi soldiers & took a likkle breaky break b4hand

- “Hmpf..this tedious Negro clinging onto his Creole heritage like a liferaft” “Maybe Tom is right: Louis just a dumb pimp who got robbed blind years ago.” “That’s a ‘sir’ for you!” “THUGGISH BEHAVIOR” “Accept your place in the world…Sodomite townhouse… I am the sun” & this is why alderman fenwick needed to die be blessed!! 🥰 . Finn o’shea tricked ur ass louis his ppl turned white off ur back ..

- This is Louis’s hobby, not mine LESTAT way to sound like a condescending husband here lol

- When your mother see the devil in your eyes… that’s a hard assessment to hedge against …

- Lestat dont get its not sm bout the money but its bout the power. what it means to be a black man in power on the margins.

- Bricktop saying the colored only sign was a stupid fuckin business plan LMAOOO she knows.

- I was what- I was manic… 2022!Louis perfect mix of self awareness v. self delusion . the loss of his creole status here coupled w everything else. born inhuman off the pyres of ur former racialization

- “DA JEWISH MAN GET IT” @ Daniel saying take a Black man in america make him a vampire N FUCK W IT 😭😭😭obsessed w her assigning him jewish at first watch

- “PUT DAT WHITE BOY INA TORTURE RACK!” shes got it man.

- Top 5 louis cut throat committy moments here why is ur heart beating so fast :3 psychologically& physically gores consumes u & hangs ur corpse up top the cathedral. This moment being louis embracing hes a vampire to smite the face of white supremacy.. wow. louis turning into the princess of pan africanism talmbout mah pipo like ok man👍🏾then tellin lestot thats why you always gone be alone like oh my word

- “THEY BEEN GENTRIFYING OUR CITY FOREVER!” TELL EM !!!

- the garish display of his body … was that also ‘for your people’? UHH YES LESTAT DATS WHAT WHITE FOLK USED TO DO (STILL DO TO) NIGGAS LIKE IN REAL LIFE HISTORY BIG BRO…

- “THIS SICKO!” at lestat wanting to make this day his anniversary LOLL

- I could not save the Azalea. I could not save Storyville. I could not save the aunt on the wrong side of the wall, but I could save her…My light. My Claudia. My redemption. (contrast this view of claudia to lestat seeing her as his dark child.. generational cycles being broken (or formed anew) and new cycles of horror being started in the domestic)

- she said A+ this a good episode

[averyspoopedcorgi]

for the ask game would you like to do eichi and mayhaps even.. tatsumi…….

atsa!!! i knew u were gonna give me tattsun lol but eichi is a welcomed suprise

i hope u dont mind some of my answers being short or shallow cuz I haven read many stories and most of my character thoughts are gibberish :,)

ok ei-chan first

favourite thing about them: his whole character, how complex he is the guilt he feels for his actions I like that he isn't some irredramable villain but just somebody who wanted to save something he loved dearly by any means possible (I hope I'm correct about the last part I haven't read about the war in a while) also half the batshit insane stuff he says is hilarious

least favourite thing about them : I have nothing I particularly hate about him I suppose he monologues are so long sometimes they make me wanna take a break from reading lol

favorite line: pretty mission epilogue only comes to mind from what I've read

brOTP: hell dorm but mostly aira, something about them bonding over their love for idols also chiaki i wanna see them interact more

OTP: the emperor and the his funny clown (wataei) have a vice on my heart

nOTP: romantic reichi or just him with any oddballs that aren't wataru or keito x eichi idk why they just rub me the wrong way

ramdom hadcanon: hell dorm movie which in reality r just aira and eichi watching idol mvs while rei snnnzzs

unpopular opinion: STOP MAKING JOKES ABOUT HIM DYING WHATS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE YES YOU CAN HATE FOR THE SHIT HE PULLED BUT SOMETIMES YOU NEED TO REALISE THAT YOURE TALKING ABOUT A CHRONICALLY ILL MAN DOSENT MATTER IF HES FICTIONAL <- mad about marriage poll

song i associate with them: im soso sorry ive got nothing ; ;

favorite picture of them: babygirl or tiger eichi i cant pick

ok tattsun time!!!

favorite thing about them: the way he talks about his faith is so interesting....youd expect him to spout bible verses left and right but after reading feather touch and his conversation with aira just reshaped him in my mind, theres so much i like about him but this i what really scratched my brain

(also more meta but i like that him being chirstian isnt treated as a joke if that makes any sense )

also also vehicular manslaughter

least favorite thing about them: bastard will not come home no matter how hard i try. i wasted hot limit funds on his revival still nothing. i have every alk five star except him. what did i do tattsun senpai/hj

favorite line: feather touch but specifically the convo with aira. thats all

brOTP: aira and tatsumi. literally the senpai-kouhai friendship of all time

also christian rock drom with koga and leon theryre all besties canonically what else does a guy need (also they take leon on walks together and i think everyone should know that)

OTP: gee i wonder what it is *standing in front of a pile of tatsumayo fanart*

nOTP: idk really??? any of his juniors ig

random headcanon: koga taught him how to play the guitar!!! now you can always hear the distinct sound of christian rock from thier dorm room

he loves dogs like really loves dogs but could never own one cuz he lived in a church for most of his childhood so hes beyond overjoyed to share a dorm with leon

also cane user and bisexual tatsumi is soso real to me

unpopular opinion: stop treating him like hes some white queerphobic christian whats wrong with you people stop acting ;like every christian is terrible

song i associate with them: ah abuseken's christ and guchiry's orthodoxia

favorite picture of them: naur who let bro drive

[mcl38]

why did i think u were british this whole time. i just now noticed the romanian and i have been following u for an embarrassingly long time. omg i'm so sorry.

i was going to ask u if the UK is really this puritanical bc like. i was raised by some right-wingers who taught me that if i even danced with someone i was not married to, i would spend eternity burning in hell, and i still couldn't rlly bring myself to care abt a guy in his mid-20s making sex jokes enough to be offended abt it. but i mean u are not british so that doesn't matter now.

this also begs the question why are ppl getting moral/life advice from multimillionaires. like if lando gets a STD, he just goes and gets treatment. if an american gets a STD, they go bankrupt. u rlly have to put how promiscuous u can be in perspective of ur circumstances unless u want gangrenous genitals from chlamydia. also like if ur george russell or lance stroll or max verstappen or— and u physically harm someone, all u have to do is issue an apology. if ur quite literally a normal person, ur going to jail for that shit like u cannot behave like a multimillionaire under any circumstances unless u are also a multimillionaire bc one of three things will happen: 1) jail, 2) bankruptcy, 3) the end.

sorry for making u read my incoherent thoughts again but i know u appreciate a good landogate. i just don't really get this one. like wow local man in his twenties cracks nsfw jokes w his friends and experiences horniness. did these people never become traumatized by omegle. bc this isn't abnormal behavior for a man in his 20s spotted in the wild online. it's actually quite tame.

hi anon! so like first off ur not entirely wrong abt the british thing - i am romanian but ive been living in the uk for like 4 years now, u mightve seen a reference to that and assumed i was english. but bc ive been living there for a while i can quite confidently say that no, english people are not generally puritanical at all, much less than in america anyways. maybe theres more value put on decorum and politeness but i generally associate religiously-fuelled prudishness with american protestantism lmao. anyways

my thing is ive just come back from a vacation where i had no roaming so i genuinely have no idea whether ive missed smth major lmao. from what i could tell the thing ur talking abt is lando making dirty jokes on stream and ppl allegedly getting upset at that (??) which unless thats all been happening on twitter and i just havent seen it bc i deleted the app (god bless) (likely), the whole 'drama' seems to stem from one clickbait article by a clickbait sports news publication that seems to b based in india rather than the uk. was this abt the way landos (british) friends responded to him on stream? bc from what i could tell they were also participating in the moaning and calling themselves daddy activities. otherwise like what predominantly british public did u see upset? its quite odd as a thing to happen

not saying this isnt a pattern w lando tho - back in 2020 idk if u were around but if u were, u should rmbr how dire the situation was. basically anyone who'd make a sex joke around lando was essentially corrupting god's most darlingest little baby boy, how dare they. theres a certain amount of infantilisation around lando that thank god isnt happening as much anymore but maybe its reared its ugly head again. or, if ppl r getting mad at him for Corrupting His Audience (if theyre getting mad at all - again ive only seen ppl saying it was totally fine and funny), then this just represents his full flip into the whore part of the madonna whore dichotomy. the same reason miley cyrus twerking at the 2013 vmas wouldve been so much more scandalous than another female singer that hadnt previously had a child-friendly teen star image.

i dont rly know how to address the whole life advice paragraph - i rly dont think lando talking abt a girl character in fortnite shooting cream out of her palms or propellers or smth is exactly life advice. lando specifically has quite a complicated relationship w his position as a role model and he often worries abt the 'advice' he gives ppl - smth thats also like, true, hes a v sheltered 23 year old who lacks a lot of normal life experiences bc his professional career basically started around age 7. idrk what to say abt the whole std thing bc like not only have i not heard lando talk actual details abt his potential promiscuity beyond a couple vague jokes, but also bc ive never had to think abt going into debt over chlamydia doamne pazeste. also like idk if i push someone nothing happens but if max verstappen does it on an international broadcast he has to do community service for it so 🤷🏻‍♀️ u win some u lose some. not rly sure of the point u wanted to make if im totally frank lol

tldr like yeah f1 drivers r mainly irresponsible athletes in an extreme sport and u shouldnt model ur life after them. but also op ur life sounds terrifying like 'jail / bankrupcy / the end' sounds like either the way US capitalism works (big up the prison industrial complex) or oscar wilde's new years resolutions in january 1895 lmao

[milimima]

She taught me so much. Idk why she was so insecure, Imean na I get it. I got her. It’s whatever. U got dis crazy lil bih fr. I really hope to see you again on top 🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣 bitvh we might fight just to get it off idk prolly not you don’t want no smoke 🤣 idk after last time I might. Boy was you mad at me. And I was sad af. Friend break ups r da worst. And we was getting money. Traveling. Finding dogs together. It was down to us 2. And shit na I get it more now looking back. Kill I fell off shit got weird. U got fucking weird bitch and then couldn’t talk about it. And then got mad at me for being mad. Is why I don’t fuck w bitvhes. I was down. And I wasn’t great w my communication fr but you was der you jhi like tried and I tried but you tried more. Everything happens for a reason. I appreciate my lessons babes. 🤍

[stuck-in-the-ghost-zone]

I think the way I talk to people should considered a form of sel.fharm

[skybristle]

Please rant about why you didn't like how chapter 14 characterized Caramel arrow. I may not have gotten to it because I'm still stuck in chapter 11 but I'd love to hear it.

pls rb!! i put a lot of thought and effort into these posts!

was talking to a friend. this is a. Horrid mash of copy/pasted stuff from discord dms paired with me typing in new shit to bridge gaps and add points but. under cut again! probably some talk abt murder and violence [but its against affo mainly so its okay /JOKE] but mainly to save space on dashes since i type a lot also note that i tend to call caramel arrow carrow. it just rolls off my mental tounge better and its easier to speedrun typing in my fanon i've also added magnolia into her story but. for the sake of arguement i'll leave her and any magnolia-related changes out. but yeah they canonically kiss devsis told me /lh ill add more if i think of anything

shes a static character. NOTE. static characters are NOT inherently bad. but she has so much potential for being fucked up and questioning her loyalties and shit. as she stands she is just. There. she does a little bit of girlbossing but ESPECIALLy in chapter 14 she is just there to go its okay dark cacao ur doing the right thing it is alright u are okay :] and she doesnt even get resolution with affo. iirc they dont even rlly get a confrontation he just. Runs away. these r my main problems but ill get into a lot of wasted potential later. ill be so mad forever and ever they didn't let carrow kill affogato. like. she had a straight shot in the end when his sheilds were down and he was just trying to get away. ut she just goes "OHHH NO AFFOGATO IS GETTING AWAYYYYY" like babygirl you are the first watcher. What are you doing. i get that cr doesnt have the balls to violently kill him on screen but like u could have shot him and left him for dead at least. Like. .... idk. red velvet gets a crossbolt bolt to the face in TOSC its not too out there. but even then carrow seems like the type to want to kill someone cleanly and effectively no matter WHAT they did so she doesnt stoop to their level. so as far as my fanon goes she shot him thru the head when he was trying to escape. like again i know canon wouldn't do that but it is dissapointing to see nothing happen with him and carrow's arc yet another injustice to carrow's character. shes just. There honestly. like she doesnt DO ANYTHING. shes kinda just [woman standing discord emoji] you could honestly remove her from the plot without much difference which is. REALLY FUCKING SAD considering that she was so hyped up and is playable. her only real character trait is 'loyal to dark cacao'. which falls flat considering DARK CACAO IS FUCKED UP?? like i know affo is manipulating him or whatever but he had to have been at an incredibly low point in the first place - likely caused by dark choco's betrayel and the stress of losing so much , including many of his watchers, to the war. the main missed potential i see: the missed potential with her and dark choco. it's heavily implied he was very very close with her - and her mentor. she even has a line abt him being the one who taught her how to use a bow. it's p easy to assume he's the person who trained her and could probably be considered her non-blood informal older brother or maybe an idol. [i prefer the former but. Yeah] have her loyalty be split between the king who deeply hurt his people for decades [since even before affo i doubt it was good considering i can only IMAGINE how fucked up the kingdom was afrer the DFW with their watchers presumaby spread incredibly thin after so many losses] and FUCKING EXILED HER regardless of affo's imput and the prince who trained and partially raised her but has done so much fucked up shit and lost his path

NEITHER of them are good people. at least completely. do they deserve her loyalty? is she reeally doing good by following anyone?? is bias by being close to the royals clouding her judgement? she can't answer those questions

but No. dark cacao good everyine else bad :3. so dissapointing this is becoming more of a stretch but this is more a thinly veiled excuse to talk abt my fanon because i make her character so much cooler and sexier but. Ya! also not to say she was probably a trainee or barely out of training when dark choco betrayed everyone when he was probably her older brother figure andddd probably got shoehorned into the position of first watcher too fast since dark cacao was in such deep paranoia after getting betrayed by his own son he couldn't trust anyone short of who was practically his own daughter but. Ya! would have fucked. her cutscene thing says she became the first watcher at an incredibly young age. u can assume in canon that just means that she was so capable she earned it so early on but like. You could ALSO take rlly fucked up implications from that if you wanted to. like. Yeah. also i dont have as thorough thoughts on this but. it's sad that we didnt see much of her relationship with the other watchers. its obvious that they miss her, care about her, and are still loyal to her. i've always thought it was a really interesting thing that despite her exile and presumably being stripped of her title they all still call her first watcher. resisting the urge to talk abt her and magnolia so i wont but like. scenes with the other watchers could have rlly helped this!!! oh also if you ship carrow x affogato get the fuck off this post i actually hate you fuck you fuck yo ufuck yuyou fuck you. Die. thats all i remember for now. Bye girl.

[han-shinsuke]

t h e b r e a k f a s t t a b l e

[🔞] k e n t o n a n a m i [‼️]

s m u t • s m u t • s m u t

ᴍɪɴᴏʀs ᴋᴇᴇᴘ ᴏᴜᴛ ɴsғᴡ

If only you were at home, listening to sleeping at last and maybe with a cup of hot cocoa in hand, you would really appreciate the heavy pour of rain outside. However, you weren’t. Therefore, you must try to not show uneasiness while he’s around— while it was only you and him inside their manor.

“The generator isn’t working,” he informs you after inspecting the machine in the cellar. Kento turns off the penlight then sat on the chair beside you.

As reported by, the thunderstorm will last for two hours. A hundred and twenty minutes of being alone with your principal sponsor, Kento Nanami. “We will be fine. We have enough candles to get us through this darkness.”

Are you sure of it? Can you keep your calm around him? Especially when he’s that close? You can even smell his natural peachy scent.

“Do you not like me?” your face almost slipped from your palm. Why would he think that?!

“No.” you reply, absentmindedly licking your bottom lip. “You sponsor my studies and allowance and you bought me an apartment. How can I not like you, sir?”

Just to clear things, he is not your sugar daddy. You were not obliged to give something in return, though, you’d be glad if he wants to. Besides, you are not the only one he sponsors. There are twenty in total including you.

“Then why are you so distant?” he leans his back on the backrest, searching immediate answer from your intriguing reaction.

Yes, you were not aware but he finds your manners interesting.

You let out a low and defeated laugh.

“It’s because I like you romantically, sir.” you avow.

“Oh.” his response, “you’re only eighteen.”

“Can I not like you just because I’m young?” you sigh, looking away. Watching the rainwater rolls down the glass wall. “I lost my virginity last month, sir. I heard from your exes that you didn’t fuck virgins.”

What were you thinking, really? Spurting private matters like it’s some kind of gossips.

You heard him coughed. You laugh, “whom do you surrendered your innocence to?” he asks.

“Megumi Fushiguro, sir.”

Why do you have to be so polite? It’s driving him mad. His chair creaks. You eye him in question. He transfers the vase to the most secured spot.

“Quit the talking, baby, let’s fuck.”

Your heart races when he sits you on the tabletop, parting your legs. He creates an opening between your thighs. Everything about this man is thick so the width fuels your desires. He’s standing between your legs, sliding his palms up and down your sides.

You remove his shirt. Tracing his beefy muscles using your fingertips. You gasp when you reached his hard packs. You went lower, inserting a hand pass over his waistband. Kento let out a throaty moan when you palm his bulge inside his pants.

You were doing right, just right to make him close his eyes and gasp for air. You run your tongue in between his chest, hand still busy putting pressure on his other head. Damn. You can feel your own heat juicing.

“Do you want more, sir?” you ask, still licking him, moving far to the left, you poke his nipplexx using your tongue then eventually, started sucking it.

“Fuck, baby~ have you done this before with Megumi?” his breath is shaking though he can still speaks clearly.

From palming his head, your hand proceeds stroking his length, stretching its skin down from the tip. Nanami growls like a beast, you did pretty well with your hand so he grabs your nape and tilts your face up.

“I didn’t, sir. But Megumi had a mouthful feast on his study table. He devoured me like a feral man.”

You retract your hand from his pants. He moans in disappointment. He loves how you work your hand underneath his bottoms.

He didn’t talk after that. Nanami helps you with your clothes, stripping you out from your restrictions. You serve yourself... naked and flushed on his breakfast nook. You were no different from those sluts he fucked before. You crave for him so you do the service.

Nanami disrobes the remaining pieces of his clothes before pulling you on your ankles. He leans down to your face, kissing your chin first. That first kiss gives you butterflies compared to how Megumi taught you the basics of kissing. He may be your first of everything but nothing can compete with this man that makes you feel 𝒓𝒊𝒈𝒉𝒕 by just kissing your chin.

Your both hands were pinned on each sides of your head. He examines you from head to toe. Your heat throbs, his tip is poking your abdomen. He’s long and thick. Will it fit? Of course, you're this ready for him. You anchor your legs behind him, pulling him down.

“Put it inside, sir, I’m ready.” you beg with your fluttering eyes. He teases your lips with his, brushing slightly. You whine. Pleading again.

He knows you were so desperate for him so he ended the thirst with a very rough kiss. Sucking both lips like its some kind of delights made for him. He surely enjoys kissing you torridly that it makes you thrash for air when he didn’t let go of your mouth.

That made him laugh. When your breathing return to normal, Nanami claims your lips again, this time, he’s moving slow, so slow that you didn’t notice his mouth has already left yours gaping open. He’s now down on your neck, sucking while a hand is palming your folds. You grope his right ass, earning a grunt from him.

His mouth keeps traveling down, it reached your bare chest. He takes in a bud inside his hot mouth. Sucking it, biting it. You moan. You just keep moaning and at the same time grinding your leaking pearl against his erection.

He pops out your first nipplexx, he does the same to the other. Flicking his tongue against it. Sucking it as well unti it turns red.

He goes down again, another spot—the most vulnerable one is waiting for him. He adjusts himself, groping your titsx hard while pinching its both buds.

“Aahh sir~” what? Did you just moan like a slut? You make him smirk and feel proud of himself. He gropes you again, even harder this time. He hears more of your 𝒂𝒂𝒉𝒉𝒔 and 𝒐𝒐𝒉𝒉𝒔. You satisfy him by just moaning his name and how good he makes you feel. He squeezes your sides, moving down to your thighs. He hit you there. He didn’t stop until he sees stars in your eyes. One star rolls down. Nanami licks his lips, planting soft kisses on your face.

“Ooohhh gosh, sir~” your body jolts when he tugs your clitx before latching his tongue between your folds.

Damn. Nanami eats better.

You grab onto his hair, gripping there. He dives deeper into your cunt, tongue lolling in and out of your still tight core.

“Hmm~ you taste like a real lady hmm~” fine, reaper! You can take her soul now.

Nanami’s 𝒉𝒎𝒎𝒔 sounds so sexy and you push more of your drenched cunt toward his face. He seems to appreciate your little movement so he eats deeper and thumb you harder.

“Sir—sir! Aahh~” surprise! You spill in his mouth and he’s grateful for your milk so he slurps everything and gives your clenching cunt a good run using his tongue.

You were panting when he pushes your legs to your chest, locking those tight with his forearms. He joins you on the tabletop, folding you in half. His hands grips tightly on the edge and pressing his knees firmly on the table with you in between.

Suddenly, you remember what Megumi had told you before that if a guy fold a lady to half, he’s been meaning to breed her.

Now. Now. Now.

You start to panic. He notices it. You receive his unusual smirk. You put your hands on his shoulders, shaking your head.

“S—sir— don’t fuck a baby into me, please.”

Instead of a reply or an assurance that he would not, Nanami claims your lips again, masking the slow and eerie penetration of his cockx into you.

He earns a loud gasp from you when he installed completely his length inside you. It stretches you really wide that a lone sob escapes your lips.

“What’s wrong, baby?” he taunts you, caressing your face. “I’m inside you. Full and deep. You will be fine, trust me.”

Your lips quivers when he start pulling out. You can feel how thick he is and how farther his tip reached inside.

He can feel your shaking so he kisses you again, focusing on your neck.

“H—hold—please sir aahnnn~” your whine is pure and appealing. He cannot wait any longer. It’s just that this is not his way. He loves ramming a pussyxx harder and deeper. He loves being in control.

“Be still, baby. I will move hard now.”

Again, what’s the use of shaking your head no? He slams right there. Just right there when he crashes his mouth on yours to drown your cries.

He’s tight. Hard. And strong that with every thrust and every pull and with every ruthless push, the table that supports the weight of the two people atop it, creaks louder.

He shakes your world and uses your womanhood the way it supposed to be fucked. He didn’t stop. He can’t be stopped. Not this time, not at this moment that he loves how you clench around him and how your cunt responds so sweetly.

“Here comes my seeds, baby~ take it all my pretty baby~” he pounds you so hard at the time his semenx spills inside you, combining with your juice. He pumps you even harder, grunting. While you, all you did is moan his name and that he should not cum inside you but he still did.

He fucks his jizz inside you, watching it leaks from your throbbing cunt.

You end up staring at nothing.

You still feel it dripping from your hole.

Nanami takes you in his arms, carrying you to the bathroom. Still in dazed, the both of you dip in the warm water in the tub. You on his lap, legs spread.

“Wha–what are you doing?” you breathe when Nanami slides his hand between your thighs, dipping his fingers between your folds.

He kisses your nape from behind, moving to the side before ending on your shoulder that he licks and bites.

“What else my pretty baby? Finger fucking you hmm~”

Just when he starts rubbing hard circles on your clitx, the rain pours heavily, drowning your moans once again.

You have proven the rumors surrounding his name. Kento Nanami fuck better in the dark.