#why not rewrite the books for an older audience and actually have consequences

[romantichopelessly]

invitation to speak more about the secret good td3 in your head, if you so desire!

Ok so I sat on this ask for DAYS because I wanted to have some cohesive, great answer, but the thing about The Dreamer Trilogy that haunts me is that I can never come up with good concrete thoughts about how to fix the issues I have with it, which is why I reference the “secret good td3 in my head” because it can never fully leave my head in any real way. That being said here’s a list of some elements I would change to make my secret good td3, in no particular order.

The visionaries don’t exist. Liliana, Persifal, etc. are just psychics that keep getting visions of the end, and die for reasons other than their power. Explaining what Visionaries are and subsequently over explaining the magic system of td3 is part of what made the trilogy so confusing and ruined a lot of the magic that the TRC universe already had for me. We don’t need concrete explanations, and psychics can still fill this role. The changing age and exploding added nothing?? to the narrative?? that I can think of?? We can even keep the age gap for Carliana if we want to, just make Liliana an older psychic like Maura/Persephone/Calla. It will even add to the excellent Carmen-Mr. Gray parallels.

Lean more into the themes of the age group. TRC is a coming of age story. It’s about being 17/18. It’s about learning your inner self and getting others to see the true you. TD3 should be more about being 19/20/21. To me, TD3 at its peak is like Buffy the Vampire Slayer Season 6. Which is uniquely about the horror of being in your early 20s, losing support systems, having to learn to be a full self-reliant person, grappling with what your parents did to you, and the crushing loneliness of not being around Your People anymore. TD3 has all of these themes, but I really think they need to be fleshed out more, and given proper conclusion that isn’t just “yippee everything is fine now!”

Greywaren is longer. I think almost everyone agrees that Greywaren, as a book was just too short to wrap up all the plot lines set up, and does almost none of them justice. That book needed a whole rewrite. In theory, I’m completely fine with how it opens—Ronan being in a dream coma was foreshadowed from CDTH, and is an idea that I’d actually thought of as interesting before even reading the book. Other elements of this book like Declan’s rampage, Matthew going rogue, etc are great directions for the characters, I’d just want to rework them. I could make solo posts about any of these.

The Pynch breakup either doesn’t happen, or is set up further in advance and lasts longer. Personally, I lean towards the latter. Adam and Ronan’s conflict is set up from the very beginning of CDTH, or even from Opal (Adam warring between wanting to stay with Ronan and needing to follow through with his lifelong plans, and being frustrated that Ronan never asks for anything from Adam (specifically, to stay) ((side note: perhaps Adam’s insecurity here about Ronan respecting his boundaries so thoroughly stems from both having a family that never would respect his wishes, and Gansey (Adam’s model of love, Adam’s model of everything) having to learn not to ask things like that of Adam. What does it mean that Ronan never even tries?)) AND Ronan dealing with the crushing loneliness of being left and dealing with the consequences of having a long distance bf who is more successful than him). So they needed to have an argument about this. It’s also just in character that these two would not be perfect communicators. So. My idea: In CDTH we get no Adam POVs, just Ronan’s side of the story. We see, rather than Ronan just getting upset over one missed text, that Adam begins to pull away after the murder crab incident. We the audience don’t know why, other than Ronan’s unreliable narration and insecurity. So when Adam doesn’t respond to that one text at a vital fraught time, Ronan does what he does best, shuts down, pulls away and self destructs. Then MI rolls around and we start getting Adam POVs. We learn that after the murder crabs, Adam was throwing himself into trying to fix the nightwash situation for Ronan (Adam is not in contact with Declan here, unfortunately). After visiting for Ronan’s birthday and seeing the Lace, Adam starts to have dreams/premonitions about the end of the world (no visionaries in this universe, just psychics who are/were close to dreamers getting the visions!!). So he obviously sets out to fix this alone too. He calls his best approximations to contacts in this underground world that aren’t Declan. Henry and Mr. Gray. (+ maybe also Maura & Calla) ((Also don’t worry Henry doesn’t leave the Sarchengsey trip, just advises Adam on where to start)). Now that Adam has lost contact with Ronan (he was busy and missed the message and Ronan went off the grid like in canon), he goes full throttle into trying to solve everything while managing being his perfect Harvard persona (this gets him close to a breakdown, very reminiscent to Dream Thieves). Perhaps we get to see Adam and Declan working together to acquire sweet metals and understand the underworld of magic together. He and Ronan fight the one time they get to talk over the phone, Adam because he is truly scared Ronan will be the one to end the world, Ronan because he feels like this is another person perceiving him as a failure and wanting to control/baby him (+ he hates Adam hanging with Mr Gray and Declan of all people). By the time Greywaren starts, Adam is wrung out and hurting and Ronan is dead to the world, so yeah. He doesn’t think he can spend emotional energy playing safeguard to his boyfriend’s coma corpse. And then by the end of the book they have an actual argument/discussion no “they didn’t need words” cop out.

The number of Dreamers/Dreams has to be reduced. It’s cool to say that dreams were always integrated into this world, but it creates so many plot holes it isn’t even funny. There is no way Niall could have passed off the Greywaren being a box that brings dreams to life if Dreamers were such a common occurrence. No secret can be kept that well, someone in the black market would have known, and thus Greenmantle/Mr. Gray/Laumonier/ect WOULD HAVE KNOWN !!!

Declan does not have all his character erased by suddenly loving his mommy and daddy. Seriously what the fuck was that. Declan suddenly deciding to forgive his father because actually Declan was secretly the favorite child first is INSANE. Especially after seeing that that changed because Niall and Mor WANTED TO KILL HIS BROTHER!!! The two tenants of Declan Lynch in TRC were protecting his remaining family and fucking hating that Ronan idolized Niall just because Niall loved him best. So why make Declan turn around and do the same??? Suddenly Niall wasn’t so bad because actually he let Declan be shoved into a car trunk during a shootout out of love. I hate this plot line. Family doesn’t have to be forgiven. Understood, that’s one thing. Forgiven?? Not always. Sick of it. The real takeaway from seeing those memories should have been closure to Declan’s arc of learning that dreams should be viewed as people completely.

I definitely have other points but I cannot think of them right now. And I want to post this so I will. But TD3, as you can see, makes me an insane person.

[lovelyisadora]

BESTIE I NEED THE FIC (no rush ofc but 👀👀👀👀👀👀 if I say I'll draw fanart of it will u finish faster ahdhdbdnd)

how about a preview? it's gonna take me a bit longer for the fic haha

—

He can’t do this. He can’t be here, and he can’t see her like this. Marcia won’t want him here anyway, so he may as well just get Zelda to check on her, even though he knows she won’t want that either. He turns to leave, but her voice stops him.

“Silas?”

Her voice is hoarse from disuse, as it had been three nights ago. Fuck, he thinks. He hadn’t known she was awake and he can’t very well leave her now, not after she’s seen him. He turns around again, unsure of what he’ll say, but it doesn’t matter—anything he might have said dies on his lips the moment he sees her, because he doesn’t recognize her.

He had been so relieved to see her the night he helped his children rescue her that he hadn’t taken notice of her. In the three days since she hasn’t moved from the bed she collapsed in, hidden beneath the heavy blankets they’d found for her, so he wasn’t able to get a good look at her. But now golden sun shines through the window and he can see the bruises on her skin, both yellowed and not. He can see her protruding bones, any muscle definition she’d once had gone.

“Silas?” she asks again. She blinks at him, confused, unseeing, and he can see the precise moment she realizes she isn’t where she thought she was. Her eyes widen.

“We’re at Zelda’s,” he assures her before she can panic, taking a step toward her. “You’ve been asleep. Domdaniel is gone.” The words sound empty to his ears, but he just doesn’t know what else to say to her.

She stares at him, almost uncomprehending. “How long?”

“Three days.”

She thinks this over. “And the children? Are they okay?”

“They’re downstairs,” he tells her, unsure if any of them are okay. Then, after a moment, he adds, “Can I get you anything?”

[gayregis]

blood and wine rewrite au basic layout

i already posted something like this before but i cant find the post so im just rewriting all of this from the top of my head

everyone’s repurposed roles:

geralt - he’s still a witcher. he’s geralt of rivia. obviously. i don’t have time or interest to think about how to rewrite the entire witcher 3 game to be lore-friendly, but i assume there would be less triss and more dandelion involved in it. for this let’s just take him as geralt having done everything in tw3 but with the personality of geralt from the books because geralt from the games doesn’t have much of a strong personality good for writing or thinking about.

regis - a bitch. nah jk. he’s same regis but just what he was like 100 years ago when he got his head cut off. he’s less spiralling-into-doom than he was then, and is less desperate and hopeless overall, but is slowly getting there once again. he doesn’t remember anything about learning from his mistakes and becoming a good person, because this regis didn’t get any of that. to this regis, it’s like no time has passed at all since he died, and he’s ready to start partying again without any thought of the consequences. he’s moved to toussaint because everyone’s already tipsy there and the north is plagued by war so it’s not a really great source to be drinking from (like if there was a sewage leak near the vineyard you sourced your wine from). he doesn’t remember anything about maturing up or about becoming a surgeon or about the hansa, so that sucks.

dettlaff - not a fucking maniac. actually a character geralt will likely spend a good amount of time talking to. total character overhaul because he does not have a personality in the actual DLC. he arrived in toussaint because he had heard that regis had returned and wanted to fix things wih him, he had previously left him.

syanna - not a fucking dumbass, yet still naive in her own way due to being blinded with the promise of power. in this, she is planning to stage a coup on the duchy (because she is the older sister, so it IS her right by law) and she supports regis’ slow dive again into uncontrollable insanity because it helps her prop up rumors that her sister’s reign is ineffective against real threats and is cursed. but this alliance does not go as she planned...

orianna -  in this, she is the owner of a gladiatorial school (instead of an orphanage), and is still like in canon a wealthy and influential individual of beauclair, yet reclusive from human society. she is regis’ best friend and goads him on, because she never fixed her own issues with alcoholism and now is elated to have him back and forgetting that they had disagreements which drove them apart in the first place. they’re best friends (NO romance) and it’s just good to see how insanely different orianna and geralt are because they’ve both been regis’ close friends at different points in time.

the purpose of this:

fix regis’ relationships with the vampires. he slowly drove all of his good friends away by going off the deep end and many are likely wondering whatever happened to him. but books regis would never consider partying like that again, so we bring the party regis back and then slowly de-escalate him into normal books regis again, and we finally get closure with him and his old friends.

cool dramatic stereotypical vampire shit. i’m talking about a final battle or conversation in a giant dark castle with large open windows and billowing drapery.

regis’s hairstyle

give syanna actual agency as a character and give her motivations that extend beyond pure revenge (although they are related to revenge) and make her more unique so she is not just a ripoff of renfri. 

demonstrate anna henrietta and geralt’s relationship as it was in the books. he was genuinely intimidated by her and i interpret him as being jealous of her relationship with dandelion, so he in practice was quite withdrawn around her as she was her overemotional and embellished self

give dettlaff an actual character, holy shit. i hate how sorely underdeveloped he is in the game. i understand why because it’s not meant to be writing, it’s meant to be a video game, but come on. i hate having the vampire with the cool character design be the ultimate villain of the whole narrative. in this, he’s someone geralt can talk to and sees himself in. he’s emotionally mature and doesn’t mix with the other vampires. since we already know what regis is like, we don’t have to sit through dettlaff making excuses for him and trying to describe what his character is like. we also get a better view of regis’ past through dettlaff’s lense. 

give orianna an actual character, holy shit. i hate how they didn’t even try with her and just used her as a “surprise, she is quite evil!” gimmick. have her actually have a larder for blood that is lore-friendly yet still jumps out at the audience as morally wrong.  give her more personality and development.

examine regis’ backstory without actually getting into every single year of those 4 centuries. we can examine how it started good, turned bad, went worse... there’s a lot of loss involved and i think this would be nice to process it.

roughly what happens (under cut because if i ever do write this fic out, this is spoilers, literally the synopsis of the whole thing):

anna henrietta sends envoys to geralt. they establish that the duchess has no conflict with geralt and that her conflict was with dandelion, only. she has requested his help because he effectively dealt with many monsters while he was in beauclair and established a trustworthy reputation (also, he’s famous, and toussaintoirs are superficial). instead of the beast of beauclair killing particular victims, it’s the countryside which has been plagued by vicious attacks of the devil knows what.

geralt arrives and examines the scenes of the attacks. the sincere majority of the victims are alive, so he speaks to them. they remember nothing, but woke up with their village fucking absolutely trashed and with vomit everywhere. they all have wounds on their necks. geralt thinks he knows what’s up, but is reluctant to deal with it because of his memories of regis, who he misses

damien de la tour is assigned to geralt as a sort of backup. they argue and geralt manages to get him to stay put in beauclair while he rides to a village they believe will be attacked next. it’s not even a full moon so the vampires don’t even come out in their bat form (disappointing) but instead just mesmerize their way in in humanoid form. dettlaff sneaks up on geralt who is (ahem) staking out the situation, and is like hey dont kill regis hes not evil hes just misguided!! and geralt is like REGIS? EMIEL REGIS? THTS WHO’S LEADING THEM? i ..... i know him.... and dettlaff’s like what the fuck how... then they get caught and regis is like oh hey dettlaff who’s this guy and geralt feels very left out :( and also sad bc regis doesnt remember shit and geralt even lists the hansa members by name and regis is still like O_O ok yeah im just going to hypnotize you to get lost ok goodbye! but dettlaff prevents him from doing this and they both get thrown out of the party.

after the party geralt is a mess and is like wtf so hes back and what... how... huh... and dettlaff doesnt know how he returned or why he returned either but they compare geralt’s knowledge of how regis died with dettlaff’s knowledge of how regeneration works and they figure out that regis just regenerated from his past body and that’s why he doesn’t have any of his memories from when he turned good.

then they eavesdrop a little more and find out that syanna has been talking to regis and making deals with him (its... not really like she thinks, regis really hasnt been doing anything he doesnt want to. shes just like “hey can you attack this village here” and regis is like yeah i was gonna host a party there tomorrow night ...) so they are like who the fuck is this woman and track her down to her base of operations, and then they find out that THEY got followed by damien de la tour, who identifies her as sylvia anna. geralt is a little miffed on behalf of dandelion that damien seems to be so close to anna henrietta but i digress.

geralt reports his findings to the duchess but does NOT mention regis because the duchess knows who regis is. then we get the same vampire talk from canon b&w where the duchess and damien are sorely misinformed on every single thing ever.

geralt is defeated and has no idea on how to fix this and hes looking hard into a mirror by candlelight and then decides to go to bed so he turns around and regis is right behind him like hey. cue ‘holy shit what the fuck’ moment and freaking out. regis explains himself and says that he doesnt remember him but the fact that he gave so many specifics weirded him out and he kind of wants to know more out of curiosity. also he wants to talk to dettlaff but feels too bad about how he argued with him like 3 centuries ago that he cant just ask him directly.

so they talk and geralt is all :(( and regis is like ok well. i kinda want to get these memories back because they sound pretty significant and also im pretty miserable. but also im not going to stop partying bc its the only thing that makes me feel alive rn. so long!

geralt and dettlaff talk to orianna and she dislikes them both but still talks to them and then regis materializes and also begins bothering them and its quite civil but this scene just serves to demonstrate how annoying they are as friends lol

there’s scenes where you can either save damien / syanna from being unalived by the vampires’ / regis’ hand, only if you let syanna die will the duchess be mad and accuse you of being heartless like dandelion is and then geralt and the duchess actually get into an argument bc of that comment but geralt ofc loses bc hes scared of her lol

no matter what you get regis his memories back but your decisions to either continue helping him or not is what makes him change or not. even after he gets his memories back (or because he gets his memories back?) he decides to raze beauclair bc hes just so fucking miserable and geralt has to talk him down, if you are harsh and not understanding and shame him etc then he doesnt change, if you condemn his actions but still offer your support then he does.

if you offer your support > geralt talks about the hansa like For Ever and regis then adds in everything and yay regis is back to normal. theres like a wholesome montage of geralt being like “just TRY to sew up a wound i promise you you will be good at it” and regis does and hes splendid at it. regis and dettlaff finally make up and are bros once again. we help orianna with her issues and she realizes stuff but is still going to have a drink once in a while. if syanna is alive she doesnt hate on any of this but just decides to make up with the duchess and then become captain of the guard (damien gets fired for being a dumbass).

if you do not offer your support > regis goes to cry in a delapidated creepy old castle and you have an epic fight (geralt is backed up by dettlaff) and he turns into a bat and geralt almost dies, they manage to decapitate regis again and put him in the ground and set a timer for 50 years

if you redeem regis then there’s an ending scene where the duchess is like “oh regis i didnt know you were in town” and hes just like <:) ahaha... yeah...

cue crying about milva/cahir/angouleme For Ever. maybe link this with the fic where geralt and regis bring them all back as ghosts/real ppl and then they have to deal with those consequences

[koiandjelly]

So Fila’s actual past isn’t very detailed, because she’s not a main OC, and I haven’t spent a ton of time actually thinking about her as a character lol. 98% of my Creativity goes to my original content characters, cuz someday when I finish actually crafting my worlds, I’m gonna write a book. I’m aiming for the lofty goals of making a full, fleshed out, intricate— just fuckin’... a whole ass Multiverse system comparable to the Lore content of Tolkien’s works, or The Elder Scrolls— gah fuck y’know what, I’m changing this post from being about my Fantasy Life OC to being about my creation baby, the effort of about 6 years (I am 20 years old, and although I didn’t know it at the time I started, I was 14 when I made the shitty Fire Emblem Manakete rip-off race that I’m gonna actually now talk about, because holy fuck this ain’t gonna fit in a parenthesis “btw have some info” bubble)

A’ight so I have a hard time keeping track of time, especially in a large scale across years. Apparently it’s related to being severely depressed without medication (communication error on my part, my parents are very lovely and helped me ASAP when I spilled the beans) while also having moderate to severe ADD. So, ya know, keep in mind that I was yet another terribly depressed 8th grader when I talk about my creation’s early days. I wouldn’t experience that time of my life for any sort of payment ever. It was goddamn miserable, because when I was midway through the age of 14, not only did the aforementioned depression spring up, but I also realized I was bisexual (And I live in the infamous state of Alabama, for reference. Don’t fear for me though, I was too unnoticeable to be bullied if anyone did know, and my wonderful mother, whom I love and cherish with all of my heart, is one of the few Christians that actually... like... do what their own God tells em to. That is, Jesus. I’m an atheist and have a general discomfort about the idea of super powerful entities actually existing irl, but I do agree with the stuff I’ve heard and remember from a decade ago in Church about Jesus. Good guy. But yeah my mom not only accepted me and reassured me when I came out, but she’s gone even further and is of the opinion/fact that lgbt folks are, really, good and normal and that God created them, so she really genuinely just... loves and accepts me. There’s no “I love you despite of this” in the equation and I am so grateful. But again. I digress)

Pause after that sidetrack, to recap, all of my medical issues began to emerge about 6 months before I turned 15. Including what I hate most, the emergence of my Fibromyalgia and Sjogren’s Syndrome, and for an added kick to the flesh, an undifferentiated connective tissue disorder. Meaning, as what I understand it to be, a nameless chimaera of many symptoms in a way that the disorder either is it’s own thing, or just can’t easily be recognized as any one disorder. And I had anxiety. If I recall correctly on *that*, forgive me cuz it’s been a while since it’s been diagnosed/brought up in a significant way, I have or had either general anxiety *and* social anxiety, or just lightweight versions of both, or something, but at the time I was horribly shy and I couldn’t even talk to the teacher after class about schoolwork, even though I tried rationalizing it to hell and back that I shouldn’t be scared— as you’ll guess, shit didn’t work out til I got medicine for it, because no amount of logic and rational thought will change the fact that I was struggling because of a literal disorder, an error of the brain, and as with that walking with two shattered femurs ain’t gonna work, trying to talk when the talk machine broke... ain’t going to goddamn work.

God. I am rambling a lot. But anyway, shit fucking sucked as a teen for me, because I got that wombo combo, prepare for trouble, make it double, precision strike at my existence as a person during fucking already difficult puberty— I am rambling. It’s 4:55am as of this sentence lmao. I had a nasty cocktail of both mental illness and physical disorders pop up once puberty hit me, so I, through many events starting from loving to draw as a toddler, to play pretend stories of heartbreak, betrayal, and death as best an 8 year old could understand via playing with Polly Pockets, and all the creative power I inherited from my Dad, plus the motivation borne through a need to escape, I started making my own characters.

So, to return to the present state of my creations, which will now be referred to as Bounding Beyond the Stars, or BBtS, I’m gonna get some things out of the way. Just to clarify, yeah? I have created my worlds in a way that is specifically meant to stand apart from the irl universe as we know it. I’m certainly not a knowledgeable researcher with any level of comprehension on Spacial law and quantum physics and shit like that. So hey, if something ever seems... like, off, or wrong? Unless it’s pretty obviously wrong in the “hey you just googled how a thing works, and misunderstood it, and made a detail based on a failure to understand stuff and that’s dumb in a catastrophic way that even a high school level viewer would notice...” kind of mistake, then hey, shoot me a message. But if some sort of universal rule seems fucky in the way that it doesn’t make sense, but isn’t a catastrophic structural error... well, Imma use that sentence to start a better one. For an example of a catastrophic error, perhaps... this: “This planet has no seasons cuz of its shape and axis! And it is also like twice as big as Earth!” That would be catastrophic alone because anyone with a grasp on planetary gravity or something, may go and think “if it’s that big, gravity’s gonna be way more intense”. And you’d be right! Which is why I usually account for those things with... *Magic*.

Before I split this post for Length reasons, and I’m sorry the majority of this was me rambling about how my general experience with life sucked from ages 14-17, I’mma state something very important about all my creations.

Magic, which will be explained in depth at a later point, is a fundamental, essential, and omnipresent force of not just any one universe in my Multiversal Trio. It is a key piece of Reality itself, as magic is the flow of many multiples of millions of unique and mysterious energies, concepts, and laws existing anywhere that Is.

To end this post, I’m going to put a quick summary and explanation why I’m rambling about any of this: The rant about my age and circumstances at the start are relevant because it’s necessary context for the tone and type of writing my creations are built upon. The foundations of BBtS are borne from a sometimes angsty, sometimes genuinely upset 14 year old who found escape in the art of Creation. There have been many, many, many heavy edits, rewrites, scrapped info and ideas, and even more info built upon it. It used to be pretty pointlessly edgy in a lot of ways, and redundant in grimdark, morphing into *grimderp* plot devices and character traits. The way it’s written today, I like to think the lore of my many high fantasy-alien societies, and all its denizens and creators and whatever else, are still written to be dark, be dangerous, even angsty... but more skillfully so, with the sort of nuance a 14 year old wouldn’t really even begin to understand. Cuz I still like high stakes stories with real consequences and character deaths when appropriate. And I enjoy characters who have tragic pasts, but now that I’m older and I’ve seen and read about and done so much more— I can write that stuff *better*. And more over, what I’m most satisfied with, is that I’m more in touch with myself as a person, and I’ve evolved many of my personal beliefs and ideals and all the things of the world I can have opinions on. But most of all, I’ve reached a point where I have consumed enough content from others to where I have figured out how to write something that should be interesting, and maybe a bit new, because I put a looot of Damn focus on identifying, and understanding, writing structure, cliches, plot holes to avoid, character traits to handle differently, and just generally making something that’ll appeal to both me, and my audience, should I get that far.

[killthebxy]

          i decided a bit of writing about this topic would be a good idea, considering it’s one i talk more and more often about in this blog. so... why am i so openly opposed to the idea of Jon sitting the Iron Throne? as a starting point, for this to be viable, the show went for the theory that Jon is the son of Rhaegar Targaryen and Lyanna Stark --- fair enough. it is not my favorite theory for Jon’s parentage, but it doesn’t bug me and i can live with it. especially because it has some advantages, such as making it possible that Jon becomes the one who rides Rhaegal, which is always super interesting to explore in my writing and my headcanons. the actual problem, as turns out to be the case with pretty much everything D&D do, is not the content but the way in which it is presented.

          first, and from my perspective, it’s cliché writing that clearly aims for a happy ending --- Jon Snow is our lord and savior and never did anything wrong in his life, therefore deserves to be king and rule for 76 years and live happily ever after. i’m speaking for myself here, but i’m sure 99.8% of the ASOIAF rp community will agree when i say that this series (the books, at least) are NOT meant to have a happy ending. bittersweet, at most. because that’s the world GRRM has built and, hey, it’s real life. it is very unrealistic to expect that this story can have a simplistic ending, where the good guys win and the bad guys lose and everything is linear and easy. so what did D&D do? they clearly wanted Jon to become the main protagonist, because Kit Harington is hot and has nice hair and the audience loves him, so they needed a motive to make him the heir to the throne --- so let’s just find a way to make him a Targaryen because Targaryens are the royal people! let’s go for the easiest way possible and say that he’s Rhaegar’s son even though there was barely any foreshadowing for this before (friendly reminder that GRRM is quality trash for symbolism and foreshadowing) and let’s do it because we can and for the heck of it! who cares if it’s commercial writing and cliché people love this!!!!! lol who cares for realistic characters and storylines anyway we have CGI dragons!!!!

          which immediately raises a question: what about Aegon Targaryen? and by Aegon Targaryen i mean Egg, Young Griff, the son of Rhaegar and Elia and younger brother to Rhaenys --- the only Aegon Targaryen i will ever acknowledge in this blog. for argument’s sake, i’ll assume that in the books Young Griff is not an impostor and Jon Connington is actually doing the realm a service --- which means this is the actual heir to the Iron Throne, if we also go by a logic that a rebellion is a non-valid way to claim a throne and that Robert was indeed a usurper. even if Jon is Rhaegar’s son, Egg is older than Jon --- therefore, HE comes first in the line for succession. and here let me be fair --- this isn’t solely a GOT problem, it is very difficult, if not impossible, for a show to ever capture the depth of the books it is based on. the ASOIAF series has hundreds of characters, i do not completely fault the show for not including all of them and i can understand this. what i cannot understand is thinking that Aegon is the only Targaryen name that ever existed and therefore LET’S NAME EVERYONE AEGON!!!!!!!! seriously. even if the guy does not exist in the show (or, well, never survived the sack of King’s Landing) --- why would you do this. literally you could just use Google and search “popular kingly Targaryen names”. can you be any lazier than this.

          anyway. on the other hand, and even assuming Egg does not exist anymore in the show --- then what about Dany’s claim? true, in this scenario, Jon’s claim would come first --- because he’s older, and because he’s a man. much as it IS sexist and misogynist and unfair, this is the way Westeros works save for Dorne. thing is... the only way for this to make sense would be if Jon is Rhaegar’s legitimate son AND THIS IS THE “DETAIL” THAT MAKES ME SEETHE AND SPIT SALT EVERYWHERE. let me address this step by step... i already wrote a meta about Jon’s bastard nature (CLICK) and the impact it has. being a bastard is the central pillar in Jon’s identity and his psychological functioning, and you do not erase 20+ years (in show canon) of living with this mindset in a day or two. you do not. it’s not realistic, it’s not humanly possible. Jon has internalized that stigma, he sees himself the way almost everyone in Westeros sees bastard children, and he feels the constant need to compensate for it --- to prove that he’s not of bad blood and not a cunning, treacherous, ambitious person who’d do anything to have a real name and real power. you don’t just push a button in your brain and suddenly none of this matters anymore.

          which comes laced with another huge problem, to say it very mildly: the annulment of Rhaegar’s and Elia’s marriage. i am honestly not even going to detail how much of a complete disrespect this is, to Elia Martell in particular and to Dorne in general --- my lovely friends who write Dornish muses can do this much more brilliantly than me. but. can i just state how much of a dick move this is? how racist and xenophobic? let’s just grab this poor woman who was already humiliated, raped, harassed, butchered by Gregor Clegane and shit on her even more by saying almighty beautiful noble Prince Rhaegar didn’t care for her to the point of getting a divorce for the sake of marrying another woman. because according to robot-Bran HE LOVED HER AND SHE LOVED HIM!!!!!! ROBERT’S REBELLION WAS BUILT ON A LIE!!!!!!!!! WHO CARES IF AERYS II LITERALLY ROASTED BRANDON AND RICKARD STARK ALIVE!!!!!!! IT WAS ALL FOR EPIC ROMANTIC LOVE!!!!!!!!! ...like. what do you even say to this. i, as someone who loves Jon Snow with every cell of my entire being, am ASHAMED that Elia Martell was portrayed as no more than meat for slaughter and a plot device so that my muse could become a legitimate heir to an ugly iron chair. not to mention --- what does this whole thing mean in the end? that a bastard is not fit to be king, therefore he must first be legitimated by any excuses possible no matter how low and vile. BASICALLY D&D CONFIRM EVERY SINGLE STEREOTYPE ABOUT BASTARDS. THEY’RE ONLY GOOD AND PROPER IF THEY HAVE ACTUAL PURE BLOOD. CAN YOU BELIEVE HOW STUPID THIS WHOLE THING IS, I FEEL MY SOUL LEAVING MY BODY EVERY TIME I EVEN THINK ABOUT THIS.

          ...in conclusion. these are the reasons why i absolutely loathe the idea of Jon as the heir to the Iron Throne. continuity errors and cliché/lazy writing that i can live with to a degree but, above everything else, the disrespect to Elia and the disrespect to Jon himself. and this is why, in this blog, i will never ever acknowledge Jon as a legitimate Targaryen. in this blog, he’s always bastard-born, no matter who his father or mother are. and this is also why the only verse where i’ll write Jon as heir to the throne and king is my mad king verse (CLICK) --- because it comes with consequences and at a heavy price, and even in this verse he’s bastard-born. in every other verse and thread and plot i write, he’s king regent/king consort because he married the rightful queen. and he’s a Snow. Jon Snow doesn’t need to have legitimate birth for me to love & adore him fiercely and for me to want to die a thousand deaths for him, and he certainly does not need to be heir to a chair. and, no matter what s08 brings, i’ll be here to rewrite it because D&D are gonna ruin this boy’s essence and nature over my cold dead body turned to a wight with black hands and blue eyes.

[mukur0writes-blog]

25 Q’s (tag)

Thank you to @leapwriter for the tag!!!

1. Is there a story you’re holding off on writing for some reason?

Yes. I have this one super in-depth concept that will require...well, a shitton of research. I’m talking binders full. It’s highly political and involves an outrageous amount of extrapolation and speculation based on history and real-world politics and foreign policy as well as past relations and state’s relations and...long story short, Tennessee secedes from the U.S. as they threatened to do a few years ago under the Obama Administration. the U.S. responds with high tariffs to this new “independent country” and rip, Tennessee, which is not self-sufficient in any shape or form, goes to hell. It would follow several characters and examine “illegal immigration,” wealth and poverty, the nature of activism, and the consequence of conservative backlash.

2. What work of yours, if any, are you embarrassed about existing?

Anything written before 2013. Some after.

3. What order do you write in? Front of book to back? Chronological? Favorite scenes first? Something else?

So far I’ve always written front to back, as it would be read, but lately I’ve been considering going more freeform and doing scene by scene, but that requires a solid outline and I have never in my life been able to outline with any actual success.

4. Favorite character you’ve written?

Depends on the day and who I’m currently working on. fan characters, Mukuro forever.

5. Character you were most surprised to end up writing?

this is probably more relevant to canon characters that I’ve picked up for fanworks, tbh. like...Genos of OPM? I never would have expected. Colonnello of KHR? wtf

6. Something you would go back and change in your writing that it’s too late/complicated to change now

there’s some shit I wish I’d refined in the current OPM fanfic, Androgen Blues, but I’m not gonna go back and heavy edit published chapters before even updating lmao. 

7. When asked, are you embarrassed or enthusiastic to tell people that you write?

I don’t share my online works with people irl, period, ever. but I’m okay telling people that I write I guess. people ask hobbies and like, that’s the biggest one so I can’t exactly hide it

8. Favorite genre to write

depends on the day. I love horror and speculative fiction. spec fic is where my heart truly lies, but horror is damn good, too. admittedly I have a lot of practice writing erotica, too. 

9. What, if anything, do you do for inspiration?

pinterest boards because I’m a fucking pleb. I like to read manga a lot and sometimes I get lucky and get bright ideas and inspo. music is a huge one. xkito and SuicideSheep are so important to my writing.

10. Write in silence or with background music? Alone or with others?

this depends 100% on the day. some days I just need some goddamn quiet, some days I have to plug into some music to write. some days I’m too noise sensitive to listen even if I wanted to.

11. What aspect of your writing do you think has most improved since you started writing?

I mean, I started writing when I was like 10, so...I sure hope all of it. lmao. technique, narrative, maturity, prose, readability, variation, style, character building, world building, audience awareness, relationships, dynamics, tone, pacing, planning...

12. Your weaknesses as an author?

i’m so fucking ADD. i’ve never finished a project with more than four chapters or forty pages so far. and I used to have a million ideas a day and go back and forth constantly but after I got into fanworks i started channeling that all into RP threads and shit and now i feel pretty bereft of ideas? i need to get creative again and start thinking in originality instead of au’s and stuff.

13. Your strengths as an author?

i like to think it’s characterisation. character depth and interest and relatability. character variety and dynamic. 

14. Do you make playlists for your work?

not so far. i have playlists for writing in general, but not for specific wips

15. Why did you start writing?

it seemed cool i guess? i wanted to join in with people. i was a humongous daydreamer and realised i could write it down.

16. Are there any characters who haunt you?

my own characters?

I mean...the oc’s from when I was a stupid 13yo struggling with undiagnosed ptsd? those definitely haunt me.

the vampire knight next gen oc’s. those...those will never go away.

17. If you could give your fledgling author self any advice, what would it be?

this sounds dramatic but I don’t do those...talk to your younger self things. I can’t go back there. maybe in 20 years. 

18. Were there any works you read that affected you so much that it influenced your writing style? What were they?

god. so many...

early on, Maximum Ride. and Wheel of Time. talk about conflict. Garth Nix was in there somewhere.

as time went on, Anne Rice really had a hand in my style and storytelling and interests maturing. Oscar Wilde further refined it and encouraged me to start looking at human theory and experiment with writing. 

Kyoko Mori really really dug into me in early high school. I’m sure her books have had a very profound impact on my writing.

my brain is totally blipping on more but I’m sure there’s a ton. before my ADD made reading a big issue, I read abt an average-size book a day. sometimes 1000 pages. i was one of those kids.

19. When it comes to more complicated narratives, how do you keep track of outlines, characters, development, timelines, ect.?

well organised bulletin points on a wordpad or something. seriously. i’m not...super in depth with organisation and notes and stuff. when i start working with full-on 100% original worldbuilding i’ll have to start using scrivener’s more in depth functions.

20. Do you write in long sit-down sessions or in little spurts?

usually long sit-down sessions. that’s always the goal. but sometimes a little is all i can do. 

21. What do you think when you read over your older work?

how old? lmao, if it’s the shit I despise pre-2013 i can’t bring myself to read it. it’s fraught with “oh shit that’s trauma wow fuck me” -> dysphoria. then there’s just the weird ass feeling of not remembering stuff you know that you wrote. and shame. i’m bad at having to be perfect, thinking everyone is judging me, all that shit. even some stuff from last year i’ve read over in the last couple months and just cringed and curled up. i really need to rewrite it.

22. Are there subjects that make you uncomfortable to write?

yyyyyyes. i mean there’s triggers for sure--like I could never ever write something involving syringes. i’d probably literally hurl. uh...abuse is a biggie. I can write it but it will mess with me, and there’s the tightrope of dealing with a victim who is probably glorifying the abuse to themselves while not glorifying it in a story, and like, i’m someone who’s been there and been addicted to that roller coaster so yeah, i totally could end up romanticising it without even knowing it (or because i couldn’t go into detail on it without that barrier). sometimes i think that varies by the day. i do write abuse but it’s usually venting more than anything to publish.

23. Any obscure life experiences that you feel have helped your writing?

helped and hindered.

24. Have you ever become an expert on something you previously knew nothing about, in order to better a scene or a story?

fuck hyperfocus, lmao

25. Copy/paste a few sentences or a short paragraph that you’re particularly proud of.

p...proud? of writing? surely you jest. no but the one i’m really proud of doesn’t really have any snippets that are interesting without context of the whole thing, sorry.

tagging @tofu-writes and @starcraftcd if you’re interested!

[ookamikasumi-writer]

Just say NO to Author Intrusion

The Fourth Wall is the Audience. -- Every time the writer addresses their story's audience --their Readers-- they are violating the fourth dimension, or wall, of that story's Reality.

These violations are known as: Author Intrusions.

Author Intrusions show up as little comments that express the author's personal feelings on what's happening in their story, or heavily hint at things to come during the story.

Author Intrusions are a Bad Idea.

----------- DISCLAIMER: This is how I was taught to write for publication purposes by my professional editors. If you don't want to do it this way -- Don't. (Less competition for me.)

WHY Author Intrusions are a Bad Idea.

Author Intrusions jar the Reader out of the mental movie they've generated while reading because the Author keeps rudely shoving them out of the story to remind them that They know something the Reader doesn't.Compare it to watching a movie you haven't seen before with a friend that won't shut up about how cool the next scene is.

See this shit? This is Author Intrusion.

Identifying Author Intrusions:

The most common form of Author Intrusion is when the writer plants overly-obvious hints of things to come addressed directly to the Reader.

Examples:

In hindsight, he would be thankful for his overreaction.

Unfortunately, his choices had truly never been his own.

If only they'd realized how wrong they were.

These are normally found at the end of a chapter, or book, but I've also seen them posted smack in the middle of a scene in progress.They had no idea what consequences their choice would bring.

I have been told that these particular intrusions are meant to be a form of Foreshadowing.

This shit is NOT Foreshadowing.

True Foreshadowing symbolically hints at things to come. It Does Not point-blank TELL the Reader that something is coming.

More on actual Foreshadowing: TV Tropes: Foreshadowing

I have also been told that this form of Author Intrusion is supposed to create suspense and entice the Reader to read the next installment.

This shit does NOT create Suspense either.

The truth is, this sort of cheap-assed teaser-spoiler Does Not add suspense because it entirely Removes the surprise factor of what is coming.

Suspense is about Anticipation. It's about waiting for 'the other shoe to fall'. When an author point-blank announces that there's another shoe, all that lovely anticipation is halved because the Reader now knows for a fact that this shoe WILL fall -- that something IS going to happen.

THINK: How can anyone be surprised if they're already expecting a surprise?

If you want to create Suspense, don't TELL the Reader outright that something is going to happen. Instead, SHOW IT by planting Clues; the butcher knife was missing from the kitchen drawer, and give Hints through ominous Sounds, creeping Shadows, character Body Language, and stilted Dialogue that something is going to happen.

Authors: Keep Your Opinions to Yourself!

The next most common form of Author Intrusion happens when the writer just can't keep their personal comments about certain characters, or what's happening in their story to themselves.

This is particularly virulent in fan-fics written by new writers who get over-excited about what they're writing.

Cut that shit out!

Literally, cut all that shit Out of your work.

Us readers do not want anyone interrupting our stories with their opinions, feelings, or comments about the story we're reading. That includes comments from the Author. Save that crap for the Author Notes.

However...

"Lines like those (in my fan fiction anyway) are actually meant as red flags; a sort of, "Hey, pay attention, I'm doing something over here!" This is because, in the...years I've been writing fan fiction, I've noticed that the majority of 'new readers' (i.e. those new to fan fiction,) will not pay attention [to what they're reading] and will inundate me with questions that are easily answered if they did. With lines like those thrown in, the questions are fewer and I don't have to waste time explaining things that don't need explanations." -- Annoyed FF Writer

While all that might sound like a good excuse -- it really Isn't.

When the author inserts comments about a character or situation happening right there in the middle of the story just to make it easier for lazy-assed readers to figure out what's going on, those comments are nothing more than Spoilers for the rest of us.

Spoiling the Story for Lazy-Assed Readers -- is a BAD IDEA.

While some readers love to be babied like that, the rest of us readers don't. The rest of us are paying close attention and we love ferreting out the author's little hints exposed by the plot's progression and character reveals. We are reading specifically to discover what the heck is going on.

Spoilers strip all the suspense and discovery --the most enjoyable parts of the story-- right out.

I don't know about you, but once all the surprises are gone from a story, I have no reason to keep reading that story.

Fixing Spoilers

If the Reader doesn't get what happened and the information to set them straight IS NOT actually present in the story, then yeah, the Writer messed up.

To fix this, they should REWRITE and REPOST the Relevant Chapter ASAP! NOT answer their reader's query with any comment beyond, "Oh crap! Let me fix that real quick!"

If the Reader doesn't get what happened and the information to set them straight IS actually present in the story, meaning; the Reader simply missed it the first time around, then the Reader messed up -- not the Writer.

When this happens, the Writer should answer their query by politely telling that reader to Read the Chapter Again a little more carefully. NOT by giving them Spoilers!

Seriously, professional authors don't cater to that crap, neither should fan-fic writers.

The only thing catering to lazy-assed readers does is encourage those readers to bug other writers for spoilers -- and us other writers don't appreciate it.

As for Breaking the Fourth wall...

Or is he?

Deadpool: Not actually Breaking the Fourth Wall. He is Narrating his own story.

Yes, Deadpool does address his audience throughout his comic books and movies. In his comics he even comments on the textboxes around him.

Deadpool also freely admits that he's not exactly Sane.

However, addressing his readers, or watchers, or even his text boxes doesn't change the fact that Deadpool is The Point of View Character in both his comics and his movies. He's the one telling the tale. He's expected to comment on everything and everyone around him because that's what POV Characters do.

Deadpool just happens to be narrating his story out loud to the voices, and text boxes, in his own head. That there happens to actually be an audience of readers and movie watchers is entirely incidental.

Now if Stan Lee; the main author of Marvel Comics, popped into Deadpool's story, that would be Author Intrusion--

Oh, wait... He did.

A...tasteful example of Author Intrusion. AKA: The Cameo.

Narration is Not Author Intrusion

The Narrator is The Point of View Character observing --and commenting on-- their part of the tale. If done Right, what is narrated is colored by that POV Character's thoughts, opinions, and comments about what is happening around them.

Breaking the 4th Wall? Nope, just 1st Person POV.

Narration is not Author Intrusion because the author isn't telling the story, the POV Character is.

Deadpool, in both the comics and in his movies, uses First Person Point of View Narration. First Person POV can look like the character is Breaking the Fourth Wall, but they really aren't because Narration is supposed to address the audience. Think in terms of diary entries, or in Deadpool's case, a massive Selfie Video.

The only time Narration should ever be colored by the author's opinions is in a Self-Insert story where the author is the POV character--

-- or in a Fairy Tale.

Fairy Tales were originally told Orally. They were spoken and acted out by a storyteller directly to their audience. The storyteller's opinions of what was happening were part of the act, rather like the Master of Ceremony for a play. When these tales were eventually written down by collectors, such as the Brothers Grimm, they wrote them in the oral style --author intrusions included-- simply because that's how they were told to the collectors.

Later writers, like Hans Christian Anderson, wanted their tales to be labelled Fairy Tales, so they used this oral style specifically so their stories would blend in with the much older collected Grimm's stories.

However, if the story is not a Fairy Tale--

Don't Interrupt Your Readers!

Written stories are viewed in the imagination like a movie. So when the author pops in a comment to make their personal opinions known, it throws the reader out of the movie they're watching in their imaginations because someone is talking to them.

"But the whole story is the author's opinion!"

That's right, a writers has their whole story to express their personal opinions, so there is absolutely No Need for the author to interrupt their readers with additional comments on anything at all during the story.

If a writer absolutely positively must comment on what's happening in their story, an Author Note is where that shit belongs --or their personal blog, or whatever social media floats their boat-- nowhere else.

Author Intrusions: -- If you're Not writing a Fairy Tale -- Don't Do It.

Unless you're Stan Lee. (He can intrude wherever he likes.)

[cloud8andahalf]

I wanna ramble.

If you kept reading expecting something you won’t get much. I seriously am just rambling about how one of my stories Embers started and has grown. So, I started this book when I was 15 and it started through multiple reasons. First reason being I had a cool dream/nightmare that sort of interested me enough that I thought “hm, maybe I can write something based off that”. I honesty think this was the first story I did that with. I do it with a lot of others now. Anyway, had a dream about this huge corporate building and I was with a couple of friends and we were hacking into computers for some reason that I don’t remember and it ended with me getting the shit beat out of me by two other friends who weren’t so friendly in this dream, but they were cool irl. That was the dream and then shortly after having that dream I went to band camp and well in high school my friends enjoyed these silly stick figure comics I drew which featured me and all my friends doing absolutely ridiculous things and one of my friends, Marty, always died. It was different every time, but it was guaranteed that he died and would later resurrect. So on the way to band camp my friends asked if I was working on another comic. I wasn’t and I wasn’t really wanting to draw at that point and I had this story idea in my head and it was sort of like this lightbulb moment. I never traveled anywhere without some sort of paper back then so I started writing down my friends names and what I was going to call them in the book and created a rough outline for what I wanted the plot to be about. Each of my friends got a character and the only thing that I really knew for sure that was going to happen was that at some point our characters were going to break into some corporate like building and Marty’s character was going to die. Those were the only for sure things. Overall I believe I started with ten characters for sure and it quickly grew to about 19 within a week or so of thinking about it. All except for 4 were based off people I knew. So the story focused around Shiloh, Sen, and Rose who were siblings by choice and not by blood. They were the storytellers in this post-apocalyptic world where there’s only one city left on earth. At this point this city was called Salvatio. The three main characters, and their friends, lived in the slums of the city. If you were born in the slums you weren’t allowed to leave until you were sixteen, which all of the characters except for 3 within this slum house were allowed to leave as they wished. All except 4 of them had jobs either in a coal mine or a factory. James and Shiloh were chosen by Sen to spy for his golden plan to take over the city’s government. Sen, and the rest of them, believed they were treated unfairly by guards and the Lord of the city. So while all I wrote for this version of the story was up until a few riots in the slums started by a character based off a kid I knew. It pissed off Shiloh and I hit a block on where to go. I knew the ending which was supposed to be set in motion by James getting killed and the main characters and their friends breaking into the Lord’s Tower, finding 3 long-lost thought dead friends, and then killing Lord Tobius after he tells everybody that Shiloh was actually originally born in a rich sector of town. Shiloh or Sen kills the Lord, and Shiloh thinks she sees a tree in the distance over the very large walls of the city. It was going to end something like that with a sort of cliffhanger ending of them leaving the town and nobody knowing if they’d really survive or not outside the city in the wasteland. That version was what I had for about twos years or so. Then I decided to go backwards and think about ‘okay how did these kids come to live/be born in the slums of this city. Why are they there and how’d they get a house?’ What happened was that the 3 long-lost thought dead characters named Hatch, Leola, and Keemi suddenly had more than just revolutionary reasons for leaving twelve little kids alone in a house. I had a bunch of other characters pop into my head that I just killed straight out in a huge riot that I had already had as part of Shiloh, Sen, and Rose’s backstory since that’s the riot where they found each other and became a weird little family. So now I’ve got these new characters and I’m sort of falling in love with one of the characters Spencer and I’m thinking, what if he wasn’t dead? Then I’m thinking, what if none of them were dead? What if not everybody lived in the same house? And then I’m thinking more into details of why should it end in a cliffhanger? I know for a fact that tree was dead. Nuclear war just happened. So a lot of things change. None of my original characters are now working and I add a bunch of older characters and some younger. Hatch, Leola, and Keemi become slightly bigger jerks through doing this, but I would later give them a little sympathy for ditching their family and friends to restart life under fake IDs. I also changed the entire atmosphere of the slums. It changed from barren trash heaps into something that looks a lot like the water area of the slums in Jak 2 (because that’s what it’s based on). But there is now the characters who live in the Safe House, a total of about 14 or 16. Of the original twelve there were eight still in the Safe House. The other four were moved. Aubrey and Lanie were given a parent and lived in a house on the other side of the slums. Xavier was given a shitty past and was homeless. James lived in a broken sewage pipe and was very happy about it. As I revamped main characters I also changed two later characters into super geniuses. Much like adding Spencer had been in hope of adding a little dry humor, these two also were changed in hopes for a bit of humor in a book that was growing very depressing. Cat and Renny were these two kids who had excelled in academics to the point of graduating high school at fifteen, getting through college in two years and landing jobs as researchers for the Lord by the time they were eighteen. All their coworkers found them obnoxious and they decided to live up to it. They quickly become friends with Shiloh and James who got jobs at the tower under fake names/pasts to be a handyman and a janitor. The slums also got a new set of rules. Those born in the slums didn’t technically exist in city records. Which meant that those born in the slums couldn’t get jobs outside the slums. The slums was also called Sector 0 and was originally meant to be a place for prisoners. People started having children there and pretty soon you have those who are numbered prisoners and those who were unlucky enough to be born there. The city didn’t differentiate between the two. They were all locked in there no matter what. Ed, who was an added character to the safe house, found a way out of the slums through a broken sewer grate and uses it to his advantage to get food and later on get his friend/love interest a safer job than the mines/ working for the underground market. Anyway I revamped the story completely, changed settings, characters, even made Lord Tobius less stereotypically evil and made his uncle more of a dick instead. I added an entire second part to the book and I took out some of the silly things from the original story including some smaller characters and some that were originally huge roles became very small. Such as the character Brona who had been added only to keep with friends who had been in that original dream I had. I also added a character who has become more and more important as I’ve worked on the book. She was only added because a friend asked to be added in my book and I figured why not I’ve got somewhere she can fit and thus Maruxa was born. The book stopped being just me focusing on friends changing the world for the better and more like a bunch of young people starting a revolution and having to live with the consequences of what they’ve done in the second half. And also took some ties of things I was going through in real life such as losing friends and growing distant with those you were once super close to. The story has become a focus on the world not being in black and white, but I also added them going out into the wasteland because I wanted them to see that the world was healing as well. At this point I change the name of the city from Salvatio to Avalon because I thought it was more fitting. I create a small town unknown to those in Avalon called Haven which is about 600-1000 miles away. I can’t remember the exact math. I keep the old title I had given the book though and make the title a little more obvious to how it ties into the book by literally having the characters call themselves “Embers” as their revolutionary group name. From the time I started tearing apart and rewriting and editing and rewriting and tearing it apart again at 18, it’s been about five years that I’ve been working on this newer version. I haven’t started the book again, not for lack of trying. I have yet to find a beginning that I like. I know the ending, which is still a sort of cliffhanger thing for the audience to decide what happens. I know these characters in and out now. Except the villains who still are kinda weird. Now since I started Embers eight years have passed and I obviously don’t see it the same way I used to. I’ve decided to kill a lot more characters than just James. Though the fact that James has to die is very concrete just because I have to keep that gag in my life even if I’m the only one who will ever see it as a gag. Of course, I’m also very aware that I may never finish this book. It was originally a nanowrimo thing that got me to write the first draft, but now I’ve got hundreds of pages telling me who these characters are and dozens of scenes of what will happen with them, but I can’t grasp the things that I really want in the book which is something to lighten a really dark mood. Maybe at some point I’ll find it, but yeah, this has just been a very long rambling about my story. I like it.