#why must they hurt us this Way | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

userautumn · 29 days ago

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"not all men" but not in a men's rights way, in a "it's important to remember that men aren't the only perpetrators of cruelty, abuse, and evil and that subconsciously or consciously training yourself to view men as inherently evil and everyone else as inherently safe inadvertently puts you in a position where you're both vulnerable to attack or harm from people you otherwise wouldn't suspect, AND causes you to limit the number of allies you might have in a time of need" kind of way.

#This is why I worry a lot about young women (teens and twenties) who seek comfort and validation in r//adf//em circles. Many of them have #been hurt through rape or abuse—commonly at the hands of fathers/brothers/uncles or otherwise trusted adults—and have decided that men must #be cruel because both they and their female/female + queer friends have similar stories of abuse. So they seek out others who share this #belief but in doing so they make themselves vulnerable to further abuse and manipulation. I haven't really observed r//adf//em circles long #enough to be able to say what I'm about to say with certainty but I would put money on the idea that being a RF on social media shares the #same hallmarks as being in a cult because the behavior of the adherents is far too similar than that of tradwives or any other modern cult.#Other RF's use the hurt and abuse these young women have experienced and twist and manipulate their truth to foster a sense of #us-against-them cruelty against a population that could in actuality be their fiercest allies. It's such a vicious and relentless cycle.#That's why when I see RF's on here all I feel is pity — both for the cruelty and abuse they've witnessed and suffered but ALSO for the way #they've allowed that abuse to be weaponized against them... many before they were too young to realize it was even happening. We as a #society have got to get better at protecting our young girls and women from r//adf//em ideology. I don't even mean that in a #“destroy the patriarchy” kind of way because that's such a lofty and disorganized goal. I mean it in a “we have to go into uncomfortable #spaces and show these girls love and empathy because right now the only people validating them are people who use their hate and mistrust #against them and if we want to save our young girls and Queer sisters from this pipeline we have to do the dirty work“ kind of way.#But anyway.#jack.txt

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0809sysblings · 3 months ago

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maybe this will get rocks thrown at me but i kinda hate when people call the 18+ prisoners "grown adults" as insults and ways to like... shut down any sympathy with them. how because they are "grown adults", they "should have known better". this has just always bothered me. i see it and i have to sit and stare at the wall for 10 minutes.

like. idk. being an adult does not automatically give you skills like Emotional Regulation, Impulse Control, Ability To Learn From Consequences, Ability To Plan For The Future, Critical Thinking, Interpersonal Skills, etc etc. you have to be Taught these things no matter how old you are. if you are not taught these things, and you are not supported in an environment that helps you further develop these things... you just. Aren't gonna be able to do them well.

adults just, typically, have accumulated enough experiences in life to have been able to learn these things. but not every adult has had that privilege. or some adults have had to just shut off the parts of their brain that would allow them to learn these things to be able to function at a basic level.

#milgram meta #when i see someone use the phrase ''grown adult'' in a derogatory way i just. can no longer even listen to them mfkfmsdf #me when no matter how hard i try i cant be a functional adult and then i just get insulted and dismissed instead of helped.#only leading me further into my pit of Despair #like. listen. i get this is a fictional piece of media. and at the end of the day i genuinely dont care That much. but also.#the way ppl think and talk about these things. even if its fictional. usually (but not always. im aware!) still reflects how they think irl #so Thats why i feel genuinely hurt when i see people talk like this.#but alas. i Am a grown adult so maybe i should just suck it up--#i simply should have utilized my DBT skills instead of allowing myself to develop mental illness /lhj #i did not have a good therapy session today (in fact it was fucking awful lol) so now i must Post Online #if you dont see me for a month. its because my traumas and mental illnesses unionized

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minthynights · 6 days ago

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“What were they doing to you?”

“Erasing my thoughts, and my will. Even I could not have endured for much longer.”

#oops I did a thing because I want to cry and hold her and let her know it's all gonna be ok #why must they hurt us in this way #(i love it)#minthara baenre #baldur's gate 3 #bg3 #minthara #gifs #on another note the bug doesn't happen here! either they fixed it or it only happens if you rescued her after a KO

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deadqueernoldor · 6 months ago

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Thinking thoughts about those from Cuivienen and how they later treated the Valar, especially after Cuivienen was destroyed.

I imagine a foundation of sorrow and a layer of betrayal and pettiness. They had promised safety. And how did it turn out? Kin of Tata and Tatie their first leaders, slain in Valinor by the Dark Hunter from which the Valar promised protection in Valinor.

And then, the War of Wrath comes and with it the destruction of Cuivienen.

If any of those were re-embodied in Aman, I wonder if they make it a point to always turn their back to Valar and Maiar. I wonder if they only speak in the tongue they had first devised all those millennia ago and spoke in Cuivienen before time and different kindreds changed the tongue, not Sindarin or Quenya from the Great Journey's time or later. I wonder if they sing songs in their ancient tongue, songs about the beauty and unsullied health of Cuivienen every time any of the Ainur are near.

I wonder if the Valar feel any shame when those who they once looked upon in wonder and love gaze back at them with indifference or disgust.

#i am so normal about the elves of cuivienen feeling the betrayal worse than anyone in aman including feanor and co #they PROMISED safety from Morgoth and orcs. they PROMISED beautiful lands without sorrow. they PROMISED all that and down the line #decided Mogoth had played pretend well enough to warrant him probation during which he immediately killed again #returns to the east and sullies what beauty had been left. and then even from afar he manages to hurt those from cuivienen with the WoW #dont get me wrong i think the cuivienen elves knew there had to be war against Morgoth for him to be defeated. but the fact that the valar #decided not to only abandon those of beleriand for over 5 centuries before that AND once the war is won also abandon #those of cuivienen to watch their beloved lands drown without as much a warning must sting.#i want there to be a concious decision of 'you abandoned your promise to us twice why should we ever trust you again even in your own lands'#a 'you promised our people who folowed you safety. you didnt deliver. you promised us freedom from morgoth. you didnt deliver. in fact your #inadequacy and decision to let him loose made everything worse for us in the east. why should we ever listen to anything you say'#and thus a concious effort to shed association with Aman as the Valar govern it. they cant leave. the way is shut. but they can establish #a sticking to their own tongue and traditions without the interference of the Ainur. they've done enough. not enough and yet quite enough.#the avari are welcome should some be reborn.#i never know if i want those of cuivienen to be reborn in aman or fade into unexistence entirely both have merit and sexy hcs #but if any were reborn i think they would get along fairly alright with the exiles. kinslaying exiles? 50/50 depending on repentance #but anyone who does not believe the valar's words and respects their decision to not ever be associated with them is welcomed neutral-warmly #they teach them songs about cuivienen. the sweet waters. beautiful meadows. the birdsong that sounds extra cheerful. fish in abundance #and in turn they get taught songs about beleriand. bewitched forests. victorious battles. wild rivers. frothy shores.#it is seen as an honour to be taught a song about Cuivienen by the people who sat by its shores once. in their language/dialect/whatever #instead of in sindarin or quenya. some millenia into the 4th age tou have a surge of ppl speaking cuivienen dialect #it becomes a clear distinction of who still has fondness left for the valar and who would feel indifferent if they vanished suddenly.#this tag essay has gotten way too long again. sorry besties it will happen again.#tag essay longer than the fucking post???? help #tolkien headcanons

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flygonscales · 8 months ago

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I’m rereading the Saga of Darren Shan (Cirque du Freak) and oh my goddddddd

What do you put in your books Darren?? It is not often I read something so addictive. I saw someone describe them as being like crack. And yeah I can see that I don’t even read Animorphs books this voraciously

(Spoilers below)

And yet. Rereading the second half of the series. When you know who the vampaneze lord is and how it’s going to end. Just:

God. (Or should I say, Charna’s guts!) the planning that must have gone into the series. I can see the foreshadowing/just a prophesy that they don’t know how to follow properly because they don’t know how it ends. It’s like how a horror film protag doesn’t check why a cup fell down because they don’t know they’re in a horror film. Darren! You had Steve at your mercy! SEVERAL TIMES!!! Kill him! It’s unbearable!!! He’s lying!!!!!! This is like a fucking Greek tragedy mess of a plot!!!!!!!!

(Just try. Try reading Allies of the Night knowing full well what’s happening)

(The Greek tragedy comparison makes sense though, Darren is literally struggling against Des Tiny, even if he doesn’t know it)

And then, Mr Crepsley is dead, and Darren (post depression) and Harkat go on holiday to the nuclear dragon desert to gather panther teeth, gelatinous toad globes and Grotesque venom so they can go fishing for souls! It’s very reasonable that the war is drawing to a close so we need a break before the final battle but those toad spheres came of left field.

And then we hear the cirque du freak is returning to Darren’s hometown!! Love it when heroes return after most of their journey and discover they’ve changed too much to go back! But especially Darren, who cannot talk to anyone or even look around too much. He died. I LOVE IT I LOVE THESE BOOKS SO MUCH BUT I AM TEARING AND CRAWLING OUT OF MY SKIN THEY HURT SO BAD I JUST WANT MY BOYS TO BE HAPPY AND SAFE AGAIN)

(Boys includes: Darren, Harkat, Mr Crepsley. Vancha, Alice and Debbie. Not Steve Leopard. Fuck Steve Leopard. All my homies hate Steve Leopard)

And another thing: now I know about actual science - ‘vampire atoms are wobbly so they don’t show up on cameras’ - that is some of the most shallow pseudo scientific bullshit I’ve seen outside of JoJo’s. I love it. It’s so silly and makes no sense.

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the-diary-of-a-moody-teenager · 2 months ago

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Me reacting to the end of the wisdom saga

@gigizetz you are a treasure!!!

#mr jay why must you hurt us in this way #the animatic for love in paradise was just ✨🤌🏻#also the end ??#soo many thoughts #gonna listen to the wisdom saga on repeat to cope #epic #epic: the musical #the wisdom saga #epic:the wisdom saga #epic the musical

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quietwingsinthesky · 7 months ago

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obsessed with the idea of the doctor and the master standing together in opposition to gallifrey post-end of time. less in it being the reality of the situation, and more in it being what the master perceives it to be in the immediate aftermath of being. well. told he was going to be disposed of. the combination of that rejection with the doctor choosing him, the way that sets them up with a common enemy. but where that enemy for the master becomes gallifrey in the abstract with the council as the face of it, the doctor never sees it that way, never thinks of it as the two of them against their own world. the doctor, crucially, kept count of the children. when he saves gallifrey, it isn’t about the master at all, not to anyone but the master themself. because how are they supposed to take the doctor choosing gallifrey over them as anything other than a betrayal.

#the master and his stupid warped sense of importance to both the doctor’s choices and the universe as a whole #which is. well. i mean he’s not alone in that. the doctor has the same ideas about himself in relation to the master. and the universe.#only the universe obviously sometimes validates him because this is a story. about him.#but my point is. the master wanting gallifrey to burn post-end of time. setting up the hybrid prophecy as missy. makes sense to me. it does.#i just wish there was more. conflict to it. more to lash out at the doctor with because the master is choosing him so *why* isn’t he #choosing the master back. why is he trying to stop the hybrid plans. this is what they’re meant to *do*. this is what being on the same side #*means*. that there must be an opposition and that opposition must be gallifrey as a whole. because in that most crucial moment the master #got hurt. and time echoed back because of what the council did to make it so he’d been hurting his entire life. just so they could use him.#you get it? you get it. my fucked up raccoon of a man she has so many issues.#it’s just such a fascinating concept to me because that is still *gallifrey*. that’s still his home. the master is not heartless.#when he tries to connect with the doctor he does it to references to gallifrey’s physical features. this is a place he mourned you know?#in his way. so. you know. how do you look at your home and want it to burn right? how far do things have to escalate that you’d rather it be #ash than a place to go back to. and how do you deal with pushing forward with this plan. when you thought you wouldn’t have to push it alone #like for one minute there they were really truly on the same side. their own side. and then they weren’t. and no one told the master that #they weren’t anymore until she got punched in the head by that knowledge. you know?#rambling again im so sorry #doctor who #thoschei #the doctor #the master

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corujani · 1 year ago

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I take it you just read the latest chapter for tsats?

lets cry together

MY SOUL WAS CRUSHED AT THAT MOMENT

Starting a support group for emocionally devastated tsats fans

#one piece #cobylu #kobylu #tsats #the sun and the sea #stygianheart #why must you hurt us this way

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inthegardenpraying · 5 months ago

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"Do you think I seek the death of all living things? There is no victory in such things. I do not want to win our war like this, little Jedi. When I win, I wish it to be because I was right, my teachings true." | "Direct action is not always the best way. It is a far greater victory to make another see through your eyes than to close theirs forever." | -Knights of the Old Republic II: Kreia/Darth Traya/Arran Kae

#the truth #kotor 2 #knights of the old republic #this is my weapon against all living things that defy the truth but when accepted is a weapon for the other person too #if it doesn't align with the truth then it is weakness #this is because you can't reason with someone who doesn't side with the truth even with it being self-evident or strong in evidence #they must use force #they must use tyranny #they must use dominance to get their way #it cuts one way and does not hurt the wielder unless the other person cannot handle the truth and turns to force to get their way in spite #people grow older and older and their truth versus the truth will die as the truth lives on after their death #it takes courage to face what is true despite what we believe and even then their maybe a higher truth behind that truth #you never lose if you side with the truth #being wrong doesn't hurt you if the goal is for the truth and not about winning #everything you fought for is preserved and is why ideas are so powerful.#Ideas transcend life and death

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todayisafridaynight · 11 months ago

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The way masato could’ve used tape or something instead of a binder but I like the idea of him being so determined to be a miserable piece of shit that he didn’t out of spite (spite for who? I don’t even think masato knows atp)

BIG AGREE.....

#snap chats #i now get liberty to share all my toxic thoughts <3 #internalized transphobia moment except masato is Perpetually The Moment #when it comes to something like tape i just feel like he'd think it's such a 'sham' so to speak #or moreso that he's a 'sham' since he has to even do things like that #at least with a binder there's an excuse that it's like clothes but. but masato likes his open shirts so LOL #like its so Painfully obvious of what hes doing and he hates the fact he HAS to do that to feel comfortable with himself #so like Forgo It he'll be miserable either way so why bother #i feel like if arakawa found out masato was using tape he'd be concerned too #mostly just cause That Must Hurt Doesnt It <:) esp cause he'd prob be using Not Proper Body Tape. like duct tape ☠️#NO STORY TIME because I Like Sports i get hurt a lot and i got hurt a lot growing up #so my mom would always use this 'rock tape' or atheltic tape on me aaaaaandd OWWOWOWOWW #TAKING IT OFF SUCKED. didialsouseitforrelatedpurposes UNIMPORTANT POINT IS the concern. the pain.#IM TRULY SPEAKING TOO MUCH NOW i must focus on class.....

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autism-crime · 4 months ago

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Yeah.

Im gonna scream into the void now.

#Why must bungie hurt us this way #LET THE BIRD GRANDPAS BE HAPPY #THEY DESERVE IT #destiny 2 #destiny 2 spoilers #echoes spoilers

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fragglerockopinions · 7 months ago

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The worst thing about suffering is that it still hurts when the danger is over but no one cares about it anymore because it shouldn't hurt. No one will ever say "I'm sorry that happened to you" especially when they barely say "I'm sorry that's happening."

#Okay to tb btw all the personal stuff is in the tags #Like. Not eating for a week because you couldn't get groceries hurts #and people will say 'oof sorry that's happening' but then #after you're able to get food no one will ever say 'I'm sorry that happened' even though you think about it and hurt from it constantly.#No one will ever say ':( that must have been so hard' because you're fine now right???? No psychological damage there?????#This example is stupid but I do think about it every time I feel hungry. I told people I wasn't able to get groceries #and there was no food in my house. And they said. Oof.#Instead of idk Oh God Are You Okay ??#No one cares when you've been abused your entire life and behave the way you do out of genuine terror because your brain is fucked forever #They don't say 'I'm sorry that happened it must have been really scary to turn you into Such An Asshole. I pity you like a dog :('#Speaking of man everyone loves fucked up abused terrified dogs and wants to be the one who makes them open up #And shows them that people can be good and kind and that touch doesn't have to hurt #But everyone is scared of fucked up abused terrified people #Humans are capable of harm even more than dogs and fear is understandable but.#Can you please call me good boy and shush me and tell me nothing's going to hurt me and let me curl up on your lap #And not hit me if I get scared and start to growl and feed me good and take me on walks and play with me #Even though I'm not very fun to play with and I'm still learning what's fun and what's mean and what's a toy and what's a hand #Plleeeaaase don't be jealous of a dog that doesn't eat good don't say 'tch he's so thin what am I doing wrong'#I want to eat good and grow and gain fat and be warm and be comfortable I don't want this #Don't say 'if abused dogs don't eat good then I don't deserve to either' no no no no eat good so you can take care of us both #Please please please I learned so many tricks to make people happy and call me smart but I don't actually know how to do anything I'm #Literally like such a stupid dog it takes me like one day of no one paying attention to me for me to become un-housebroken #I make a lot of mistakes even though I know better or I really should know better #And sometimes do things wrong on purpose to get attention either yelling or showing me how to do it right #But most of the time I genuinely don't know how to do stuff because I was never taught or I was taught and #My previous owners said 'this is how it is. It is this way because it is and it is forever. The answer is Because.'#'now quit asking repetitive questions before I pop you'#If I do something Because and not know the reason why I'm doing it that's not learning that's acting #Especially habits taught specifically to hurt me and not being allowed to question it or know why I'm being hurt #Oh my god I acted out so much when I was younger and all my friends were so disgusted and hurt by me and yelled at me every day

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ctl-yuejie · 2 years ago

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I adore WinTeam but P’Pruek is the true delight.

His face when Win told him and Dean that he had already slept with Team.

Truely the expression of a man who is well-meaning but about to smile very widely at the kind of psychological damage that has been suddenly unleashed on him