#why is that not enough anymore goddddddd

[always-thyme]

I maybe have many drafts of a fic where Elon Musk tries to steal Peter Parker away by threatening to fuck Tony's life up irreparably and Tony assumes Peter just likes him better and lets him go. And then Tony wakes up the next morning to find the world literally on fire with Elon's face on holograms everywhere declaring himself the new overlord and I did this back in fucking JULY so I'm like... why could this not have stayed FICTION.

Now it's no longer enough for Tony to go full protective mfer on his ass, and that's fully actual Elon Musk's fault. Now Tony and Peter have to dismantle capitalism and I don't have TIME because REAL LIFE IS ON FIRE because of REAL LIFE ACTUAL ELON MUSK. UGH. Where is Karl Marx when you need him.

[ttroubledwaters]

WHAT THE FUCK IS WRONG WITH ME THAT I CANT FUCKING SLEEEPPPPPP. It's not that I don't want to anymore, I FUCKING CANT. And yes I'm aware of how many "fucking"s Ive used and I don't think it's nearly enough. IM FUCKIN TIRED, WHY CANT MY BRAIN JUST SHUT THE FUCK OFFFFFFFG. GODDDDDDD.

[almostempty]

but you take great pleasure in catching a man in the act.

me

The deep sable eyes resembling a baby calf’s are staring at you through the glossy photo paper. He’s sporting a mustache reminiscent of Burt Reynolds that is calling your name. His smirk is laced with a charming cockiness. 

stupid beautiful idiot sexy man

Which is why I want to know who he’s fucking. I know there’s another woman, or maybe even a guy

mmmm why not both

You hate to admit it, and someone would have to waterboard this information out of you, but the hat is doing something for him.

Or you.  Whatever. 

LMAO REAL

He shops weekly on Wednesdays

he can do anything on me

(he always puts the cart back inside the store, not the cart returns in the parking lot),

iconic cowboy king behavior

takes the same route home everyday, watches Jeopardy while he eats dinner – you caught on quickly that he cooks during Wheel of Fortune, it appears he isn’t a big fan of Pat and Vanna, dishes promptly following Final Jeopardy and bed by nine.

giggling over this, like so real of him

Thank the universe he left his blinds open. 

yes yes yes yes yes

Even through the binoculars, you can see how big his cock is. Your mouth salivates at the sight, wanting to feel the stretch of him in all your holes. 

drooooling

You’re not supposed to see this. Not at all.

heheheheh

You’re feeling like a grade-A pervert right about now but the sight is too glorious to look away. He spits on his hand, and languidly begins stroking his cock. He runs his other hand through his hair, his toned arms flexing with his movements, his chest heaving. 

oh my goddddddd

It shouldn’t turn you on like it does. For one, it’s highly unprofessional. Secondly, he’s unaware he’s got an audience. Morally speaking, it’s definitely not your shining moment. But it’s the hottest thing you’ve ever seen, watching him tease and work himself up. You couldn’t pry your eyes away if you wanted to. 

shhhhhh it's okay bb, it's not real, just keep watching and tell me all about it

Jack’s not the only one getting worked up; your clit throbs so hard you feel like it’ll go numb.

real

He continues his slow movements, dragging out his pleasure at a delicious and excruciating pace. Somehow, this makes the whole scene that much hotter; the display of restraint and discipline. You wonder if he does that with his lovers. Teasing, teasing, teasing, giving just enough to drive you insane before slowing almost to a stop. 

OKAYYYYYY NEEED, my eyes are rolling back

You mirror Jack’s pace - teasing your lips with a featherlight touch, inching closer and closer to your needy clit, stopping just shy of it, to tease yourself more. It’s agonizing in the best way, taking your time like this. Normally, you like efficiency when making yourself come, rarely going the extra mile to turn the pleasure dial up, but this makes you question why you’re ever in a hurry. 

she's so hot tooo okay i need them both

You reach your clit, going in gentle circles to match Jack’s unhurried pace. You wish you could hear the sounds he’s making, all the grunts and whimpers escaping his plush lips. 

SAME LEMME HEAR 'EM

He speeds up his strokes, now ravenous for his delayed release and so are you. Overtaken by the need to come, you drop the binoculars, letting them fall to the floorboard. You’re not even watching him anymore, having seen more than enough to commit to your spank bank. With your eyes closed and head pushing into the headrest, your mind is flooded with images of Jack fucking you slow, hard and deep, absolutely destroying your pussy – legs over his shoulders, hitting the spot that makes you scream and cry in euphoria. The image of him spilling into you, filling you up with his come is what tips you over the edge, your body shivers in bliss and you rock against your hand to ride out the high, feeling faint from the intensity. 

that entire paragraph YESSS SO HOT

After you’ve recovered and fumbled your chance of ever seeing The Pearly Gates, you dare to look back to his house, to find all the lights back off.

uh oh

“You like watchin’ people don’t ya?” he asks, his tone is dark, but not angry. No, it’s something else entirely. 

screaminggGGGGGG

“You like watchin’, but darlin’ I want to know, do ya like bein’ watched?”

PLS

private eyes - jack daniels x private investigator!f!reader (18+ MDNI)

this is for @iamasaddie little lady kinky may challenge! congrats on 2.5k! <333 I was paired with Jack / Voyeurism.

banner by: @cafekitsune

tags: voyeurism (reader watches jack), masturbation (m & f), reader is a private investigator, gratuitous descriptions of my fav cowboy stroking his big cock, dub-con a little? reader masturbates in her car but there isn't anyone around so public but private

a/n: this is the first fic I've completed in months. it's short and to the point, idk how i feel about it but it pushed me out of my writing slump! kinda want to do a part 2 for this, what do y'all think 👀

wc: ~1.6k

smut below the cut

 “I want you to catch that son of a bitch in the act.”

The visibly scorned woman, Camilla, sitting across from you asks through tears, ones that she hasn’t allowed to escape down her cheeks; catching them right at the waterline with an overused tissue.

This isn’t the first time a disgruntled, mistreated, or betrayed lover has sought out your services — no shortage of shitty men leaving trails of destruction while they pillage and greedily chase their own interests. She’s no different, seeking closure from the broken-off engagement from her now ex-fiancée, Jack Daniels. The pair had been together for a year, engaged for three months and one day, out of the blue, Jack broke it off. According to her, he didn’t give a concrete reason, something vague about being consumed with his job and that “she deserved a better life than that”. 

Of course you get paid a pretty penny for your work, but you take great pleasure in catching a man in the act. Whether the woman needs proof for divorce settlements, custody battles, or to just have leverage. Whatever the case may be, you find a gratification you don’t get anywhere else; the upheaval of a man trying to have his cake and eat it too. 

The conventionally attractive woman you couldn’t pick out of a line-up slides her homemade dossier across the coffee shop table, tacky & sticky from previous patrons. You flip through the information presented to you, taking mental notes as you go. You can’t deny the heat that rises up your face as you study the picture of your next target. The deep sable eyes resembling a baby calf’s are staring at you through the glossy photo paper. He’s sporting a mustache reminiscent of Burt Reynolds that is calling your name. His smirk is laced with a charming cockiness. 

“He’s quite the looker, I know. Hell of a lay, too,” her words snap you out of your daydream. Her words feel hollow, his looks are the only attributes she’s mentioned during the duration of the consultation. You're not getting paid for moral judgements and you remind yourself you don’t know the whole story. 

“Which is why I want to know who he’s fucking. I know there’s another woman, or maybe even a guy… he’d answer calls in the middle of the night and step into another room and I swear I could hear a woman’s voice on the other end, he’d tell me he’s going on work trips… he works at a whiskey distillery, why the hell does he need to go on all these trips?” She explains, putting air quotes around ‘trips’ with her dainty, well-manicured hands, “he’d stay late at work a few nights a week, and then it turned into a nightly thing… Anyways, you come highly recommended, so I’m trusting you won’t let me down,” she adds. You’re not a fan of the passive aggressive, back-handed compliment she gives you, but ultimately you give her an understanding smile as you both rise from the table. 

“I’ll be in touch,” you tell her, as you exit. As cliche as that line is, you love saying it every time. 

Days of following Jack around have proven to be fruitless. The man has a simple routine: wakes up at six, traipses to the bathroom to begin his morning regimen of a showering, shaving and grooming his beloved mustache, and to conclude,  adorns his body in his tight denim jeans, a crisp button-down, a cowboy hat, and boots to match. You hate to admit it, and someone would have to waterboard this information out of you, but the hat is doing something for him. 

Or you. 

Whatever. 

He shops weekly on Wednesdays (he always puts the cart back inside the store, not the cart returns in the parking lot), takes the same route home everyday, watches Jeopardy while he eats dinner – you caught on quickly that he cooks during Wheel of Fortune, it appears he isn’t a big fan of Pat and Vanna, dishes promptly following Final Jeopardy and bed by nine. In three weeks Jack hasn’t had a single visitor, of any gender, leaves work at five like everyone else, the man isn’t adding up to be a cheating womanizer like Camilla had set him out to be. Not to say that he isn’t, but you’re not finding any evidence to support that claim. You’ve actually found yourself developing a crush on the man. He’s undoubtedly handsome, seemingly laid back despite his strict routine, and there’s something mysterious that lies beneath that you’re itching to unearth.

You’re parked discreetly across the street from his house. It’s a nice quiet street, with only two lamps to illuminate the surrounding neighborhoods, allowing you to stay shrouded in the night. 

You’re about to call it a night, exhaustion settling deep into your bones, when you notice a lamp turned on in the living room. Fortunately, the window faces the street, making your job that much easier for you. You pick up your binoculars to peer in, adjusting the focus for your prying eyes. Thank the universe he left his blinds open. 

He sits on the couch with his back facing you. It looks like he’s reaching for the remote, like maybe he’s having trouble sleeping, but when he settles back into the couch, you notice he’s butt ass naked, in all his glory. Even through the binoculars, you can see how big his cock is. Your mouth salivates at the sight, wanting to feel the stretch of him in all your holes. 

You’re not supposed to see this. Not at all. Usually in your assignments, you don’t get the full X-rated view, just the PG-13 suggestive one, and you are more than grateful for that. 

But not now.

You’re getting your own private peep show from the man you’re getting paid to spy on. You’re feeling like a grade-A pervert right about now but the sight is too glorious to look away. He spits on his hand, and languidly begins stroking his cock. He runs his other hand through his hair, his toned arms flexing with his movements, his chest heaving. 

It shouldn’t turn you on like it does. For one, it’s highly unprofessional. Secondly, he’s unaware he’s got an audience. Morally speaking, it’s definitely not your shining moment. But it’s the hottest thing you’ve ever seen, watching him tease and work himself up. You couldn’t pry your eyes away if you wanted to. 

Jack’s not the only one getting worked up; your clit throbs so hard you feel like it’ll go numb. Your heartbeat echoes in your ears thump-thump thump-thump. You let out a whine when Jack massages his tip, precum dribbling out like a sweet nectar you’d like to feast on. He continues his slow movements, dragging out his pleasure at a delicious and excruciating pace. Somehow, this makes the whole scene that much hotter; the display of restraint and discipline. You wonder if he does that with his lovers. Teasing, teasing, teasing, giving just enough to drive you insane before slowing almost to a stop. 

Possessed by desire, you haphazardly look for any lingering people outside before unbuttoning your pants to shove your hand to where it's needed most. You gasp at the cool air hitting your thinly clothed pussy, you can smell your own arousal seeped into your panties and it spurs you on further. You mirror Jack’s pace - teasing your lips with a featherlight touch, inching closer and closer to your needy clit, stopping just shy of it, to tease yourself more. It’s agonizing in the best way, taking your time like this. Normally, you like efficiency when making yourself come, rarely going the extra mile to turn the pleasure dial up, but this makes you question why you’re ever in a hurry. 

You reach your clit, going in gentle circles to match Jack’s unhurried pace. You wish you could hear the sounds he’s making, all the grunts and whimpers escaping his plush lips. 

He speeds up his strokes, now ravenous for his delayed release and so are you. Overtaken by the need to come, you drop the binoculars, letting them fall to the floorboard. You’re not even watching him anymore, having seen more than enough to commit to your spank bank. With your eyes closed and head pushing into the headrest, your mind is flooded with images of Jack fucking you slow, hard and deep, absolutely destroying your pussy – legs over his shoulders, hitting the spot that makes you scream and cry in euphoria. The image of him spilling into you, filling you up with his come is what tips you over the edge, your body shivers in bliss and you rock against your hand to ride out the high, feeling faint from the intensity. 

After you’ve recovered and fumbled your chance of ever seeing The Pearly Gates, you dare to look back to his house, to find all the lights back off. It’s a bit of a relief, feeling less shameful of what you’ve done now that you can’t see him at the moment. 

You button your pants backup and lean over to retrieve the forgotten binoculars from the floorboard, as your fingers grab them you hear a knock on the window. The sudden rap on the glass makes you flinch, feeling your skeleton attempt to flee from your corporeal body. Your heart drops to your stomach when you see Jack standing outside your car, leaning one forearm against the body so his face is level with yours. Fuck fuck fuck. You’ve been caught. Dizziness and nausea war within you as you roll down the window. You open your mouth to explain the situation, but words never escape your mouth. 

“You like watchin’ people don’t ya?” he asks, his tone is dark, but not angry. No, it’s something else entirely. 

“I–”

“‘S’alright. Caught onto ya pretty quick. A pretty face like yours ain’t hard to miss.”

“I– i’m sorry, um,” you scramble to find words, any words but Jack interjects again. 

“You like watchin’, but darlin’ I want to know, do ya like bein’ watched?”

[fleetsonourgecentral]

I just randomly remembered that in the Archie comics, Tail’s gets his shoes as a birthday gift from Sonic, and he’s so excited about it because they look just like Sonic’s shoes! Like, he just adores Sonic as his big bro and I’m in my feels about this now so I bring you another thought: Fleetway Tails gets a leather jacket that is based off of Scourge’s. Because yes, Scourge is absolutely a terrible influence on both Sonic and Tails, but he’s their terrible influence and Tails adores Scourge just as much now. Maybe it’s more steampunk-ish because he’s an inventor/mechanic? I don’t know, I just don’t really see him going for a flame aesthetic like Scourge. But now I can’t decide which would be better: Tails just walks out of his room one day wearing the jacket and EVERYONE immediately realizes why he’s doing this except Scourge who just thinks the kid is learning good fashion sense from him, or Tails DOES get the jacket as a present (maybe from Scourge himself?), and he and Scourge get to bond. What do you think?

Oh my goddddddd the thoughts you bring me are galaxy brained as always.... consider! What if we do both

Tails grabs the first halfway decent leather jacket that fits him he can find from some kind of bin and brings it home to clean and disinfect it. It's a pretty basic leather jacket, but it's got black studs and spikes on the shoulders and elbows, and some kinda edgy words or imagery printed on the back and it's a liiiiiiiiittle too big for him, but it's fine he can make it work

And he just walks out wearing it one day and everyone IMMEDIATELY clocks what he's doing because no one in the freedom fighters wears a leather jacket anymore, and certainly not a jacket with any decor except Sonic's face plastered on the back, so everyone INSTANTLY knows where this is coming from....

.... except for Scourge, because he's literally never thought it might be possible for someone to look up to him so much they start to mimic him. He just thinks he's started a trend or something, and he gloats about it to Sonic's face, and Sonic has to tell him he's not the first person in the freedom fighters to wear a damn leather jacket (he knows damn well Tails is taking after Scourge and not Porker or something because they had a jacket with Sonic's face on the back and Tails just. Never wore it a lot, and when it finally got destroyed he didn't ask for a new one so they never replaced it)

It probably takes Scourge like at least a week to twig that Tails is not wearing this goth looking leather jacket that does not suit him at all because he's picking up a fashion sense, but when he does figure it out he lowkey feels really honoured bc, again, no one has ever looked up to him that much, if he wanted something like that back in Moebius he had to force it

Because Tails literally found it in the fucking bin tho the quality is not guaranteed, and eventually it gets destroyed in some kinda fight and some of the freedom fighters are sighing in relief bc it was impossible to take Tails seriously in that lil goth jacket trying to claim he wanted it because the spikes made him look tough even though they all knew the real reason. They feel bad though because he looks so sad about it, but he seems to get over it quick enough, bc they're always losing shit like that in fights

Then for his birthday or christmas he finds he has a gift from Scourge, and when he opens it he finds it's a better steampunk leather jacket, one that actually fits him right and suits him and won't be easily destroyed in a fight. Scourge claims it's because he doesn't want to be the only one with good fashion sense around here, but everyone knows the truth. They all just pretend not to see him give advice on how to best care for a leather jacket later

(And Sonic definitely is just developing heart problems, no it is not affection at seeing Tails look up to the guy he loves, and the reason why he's not jealous Tails took after Scourge's jacket and not his own jackets is because those were custom jackets and were too expensive to get made for him anyway. That's it no other reason shut the fuck up Amy)

[whoslaurapalmer]

The last performance of our play was three days ago. Since the Daily Punctilio doesn’t have a theater section anymore, Bertrand and I haven’t been reading any rave reviews but we were rereading but, what can you do.//It looks like it’ll be the last play for a while.//when the last time Bertrand had seen him had been one night fourteen years ago, as Lemony had been slipping out the back door of a theater before Beatrice could see him, not knowing Bertrand had.

bea's letter and an afternoon long ago!! an unexpected combo.....

-i have, so many jumbled thoughts, about the play, about bea and bertrand performing it, about lemony, i will try and iron them out

-"our play" because, okay i don't have the energy to check if this is canon either, i was assuming the play beatrice performs was written by lemony. why???? can someone confirm this for me if it's canon. is it because the play was called "my silence knot"? probably.

-i have always assumed bertrand was the co-star mentioned in the beatrice letters, and so have many others!! forget about it from a love triangle angle. this makes it two people in love with a playwright, performing a play he wrote about himself and one of those people, like, the pining, the shenanigans, it's perfect. i've been thinking about this again for a different fic as well.

-the daily punctilio doesn't have a theater section anymore, because not only is lemony ousted as theater critic from the punctilio, it looks like the whole theater section is cut completely in favor of geraldine's 'secret organizations you should know about' column.

-they were rereading lemony's previous reviews of their play. again, like.....i'm really understating the potential of lemony having written this play and bea and bertrand performing it. it's so good

-it'll be their last play for a while partially because lemony wrote it, they would perform no other play, the run of it is likely over as well, but mostly because, okay did this come across in the letter at all or do people really have to hunt for it because bea didn't want to think about it so i didn't push it enough?? no you know what i think i did decent foreshadowing for it. i think there are places that definitely point towards it. she's pregnant with violet. by the time a new play is picked, by the time rehearsals start, bea probably wouldn't be able to do it.

-it's also implied that bea and bertrand are going to the island (or going somewhere, and they wind up on the island), so she also wouldn't be available. wow there was a lot going on in bea's letter, goddddddd. some of which i should have smoothed better, probably.

-i only ever mentioned this once on here, i think? one of my earliest headcanons in 2013 when i started writing sad lemon man fic was that bertrand knew lemony was alive, and bea did not, because lemony attended a completely different play that bea was in, after violet was born, after he'd left and was on the run and didn't contact them and was presumed to be dead, just to see her, just to reassure himself that she was alright, and bertrand happened to see him leave. actually, the short scene i originally wrote for it was, ramona sees him, and she tells bertrand, and they immediately agree to never tell bea, ever.

-and i just hold onto that, like i do with some of my early thoughts, because, idk, i just do. an added level of sadness. and so it wound up in an afternoon long ago.

[st8rkey]

reaction dump 🩵🩵

i also just finished part 2 before reading this and every bit got me feral. i was literally pacing around the room trying to compose myself after reading it 😭 literally TOO EXCITED to read this

i already saw cheating in the warnings and im so scared for rafe now.. okay bye!!

—

Rafe takes what he wants, and he doesn’t go down with a fight. Hopefully, that runs in the family. — imagine cam and rafe fight each other. dude i would die if that happens

“C’mon... You’re my girl. I need you happy before I go out on the field or I'm not gonna be able to concentrate on shit.”

love it when they say ‘my girl’ my god, please fuck me already? thanks 😊😊

“Mmm… That’s my girl,”

my back just snapped like a glowstick

“You look good. Fuck, you look pretty, baby,” he hums.

fuck i’d fold so hard. like turn that tv off and take your clothes off.

—

“We don’t need to tell him, alright?” He asks. “Can you keep that between you and me? I just don’t wanna have him get in the way of this– you and I. Of course, you two still have each other, but I think what we have is different.” — WAITTT FUCK WHATT?? girlfriend i think my mattress might break because of how much i’ve been hitting it. im going feral over here..

—

“What, you’re not gonna let me watch,” JJ smiles and winks as he sees you on Rafe’s end. Rafe shoves him out of focus–the two bickering back and forth, getting their jabs in between laughs. “Goodnight, sweetheart,’ JJ calls to you.

“Yeah, you too, bitch,” Rafe smiles..

IM DYINNGGGGG i can’t anymore. stop this is the reason why i love you and your account so much 🤍

—

You look at Cam, he holds your gaze for a moment before burying his face in his hands. No.

fuck no what, i had to re-read this part ten times before i understood. WHATTTT your mind is genius.

I mean, he lied… He pretended to be Rafe–his own brother, the man who told him to stay away.

OH MY GODDDDDDD. STOPPPPP 🫠🫠

“Why did you stop, baby?” You ask Rafe, letting your eyes flick up to Cam’s as well, running on pure adrenaline. “Strip.”

oh shittttttt— uhm i think im not even able to think straight after reading this (in a good way obviously)

He rubs this thumb across the wetness, lifting it to his lips to suck it clean with his eyes on you. bend me over the bed and fuck me or something because WHATTT

“Damn, you’re evil for this, baby. Shit… Just wait for tomorrow night I fuckin’ swear-” — oh you are amazing for this, what do i do without you? no, what does tumblr do with without you 🥹

⤷ you don’t know how much i love you. i swear, you always feed my obsessions in all the right ways.

—

Your bottom lip pouts and trembles in overstimulation as fat tears roll down your hot cheeks. You look down at Cam, scratching your nails into his buzzed hair. His eyes rake up your body, landing on your lips, licking his own—no doubt thinking about his dick sliding in and out and your lips on him.

girl what are you doing to me?? i can’t do this. screaming and giggling in bed right now

“Fuck–Fuck, JJ. What the hell?” — for fucks sake are you kidding me 😔😔

What the fuck did I just do?

that’s what i’m wondering too!! i am baffled, shocked, are there any other synonyms? part 4 can’t come soon enough 😫 love me some drama

I LOVE YOU, i��m obsessed with this.

𝕊𝕙𝕒𝕣𝕚𝕟𝕘 ℙ𝕒𝕣𝕥 𝟛 – 𝕋𝕨𝕚𝕟 ℝ𝕒𝕗𝕖 𝔽𝕚𝕔

+18 𝓜𝓲𝓷𝓸𝓻 𝓓𝓝𝓘

Part 1 𝜗𝜚 Part 2

𝙲𝚞𝚛𝚝𝚊𝚒𝚗𝙱𝚊𝚗𝚐𝚜!𝚁𝚊𝚏𝚎 𝚡 𝙱𝚞𝚣𝚣𝙲𝚞𝚝!𝚁𝚊𝚏𝚎 𝚡 𝙶𝙵!𝚁𝚎𝚊𝚍𝚎𝚛

Warning: language, pet names, kissing, angst, accidental cheating, manipulation, cheating, skype sex, sex toys, mutual masterbation, mentions of a sex tape, swearing, degredation, dom!rafe, multiple orgasms, overstim., brief oral (fem. receiving), Cam takes the toy and starts using it on her, he also performs brief oral without verbal constant

📖 After meeting Rafe's (CurtainBangs!) twin brother Cam (BuzzCut!) for the first time, Rafe gives you a proposal you can't help but accept: sharing you. What Rafe didn't expect was his jealousy… And what you didn't expect was a text from Cam a week later wanting to see you again.

Reader’s POV:

The text from Cam sat there staring at you. Miss me? ‘Cause I need you princess.’ Those words carry the weight of everything you hadn’t even gotten to process yet. You pace the apartment, thinking about the next steps, your thoughts battling—looping on an endless cycle. Cam’s text wasn’t just a message… That was an invitation.

Rafe told you the night was supposed to mean nothing, but it meant an awful lot. It was supposed to be something fun, maybe a one-time thing… Something Rafe said he had done in the past, but something had changed when it came to you. There were feelings there far beyond anything he had felt before. Now you’re left standing in the aftermath a week later, feeling like the ground is shifting underneath you.

Cam is Rafe’s brother… His fucking twin. Someone he trusts–someone he brought into your life without hesitation. But to you, Cam wasn’t just Rafe’s brother anymore. That night created something new between you that you didn’t think you could handle…

Grabbing your phone, you sit on the couch, fingers hovering over the keyboard.

You: Okay.

The word stares back at you… Simple, but heavy. Sending this message without talking to Rafe first… what am I thinking? But, in a way, it wasn’t just you and Rafe anymore. Rafe had opened that door… And you weren’t ready to close it.

I can’t. You toss your phone down on the couch cushion beside you, heart banging in your chest. Walking to your room, you gather your things, desperately needing to get out of the house and clear your mind. Maybe time is exactly what I need; you think to yourself as you grab your keys and head toward the door.

You bite your lips, guilt creeping in as you come to terms with the fact that Cam is Rafe’s brother… If I don't say anything at all, he’d come regardless. Rafe takes what he wants, and he doesn’t go down with a fight. Hopefully, that runs in the family.

You look down at your phone, the message still sitting there unsent. Your stomach twists as you think about Rafe’s admittance last week in the bedroom. How blindsided would he be if he knew you had been thinking about this as much as you have–letting it affect you the way it is?

Again, you set your phone down and roll out the tension in your neck, weighing the pros and cons and analyzing the risk. As you tip your head back on the couch, you hear your phone buzz. You grab it off the couch cushion, half-expecting another text from Cam, until you see Unkown.

“Hey,” you say, trying to keep your voice steady, but you can hear the waver.

“Hey, princess,” Rafe replies, his voice warm and familiar, helping ease your tension. You can hear the commotion of the hotel lobby in the background, the faint hum of noise as the boys gear up to head out to the stadium. “What are you up to, baby?”

You glance at the TV ESPN College GameDay, already loaded. It should be a simple answer… But your mind is a mess, making it hard to wade through your thoughts.

“Baby?” He tries in a gentle voice. “You there?”

“Mhmm…” You hum, pushing the utterance past your lips. “Just scrolling Tumblr, waiting for the game to start; relaxing.”

“Good,” he drawls, his voice warm and smooth. “Just wanted to make sure you got the game to load.”

You pause and close your eyes, feeling the weight of your messages from Cam pushing down on your chest. The words are already forming in your throat. “Rafe,” you blurt.

“Yo,” he laughs nervously. “Uhh… You good, baby?”

You clear your throat, feeling heat pool in your cheeks. “Yeah… I–I got a text from Cam.”

The silence on the other end of the phone is deafening. You listen closely, hearing the lobby noise come through a little louder. “Uh, what? What did he say, baby?” He finally asks, keeping his tone calm.

“He said he wants to see me,” you whisper, met with more silence from Rafe.

“Jesus Christ,” he grumbles. “He’s my brother… ‘Course he can’t stay away.” There’s a lightness to his tone as if he’s not at all surprised. The tension in your shoulders falls slightly at his response. Unsure of what his response would be—anger or jealousy—no part of you expected this. “You’re fine, princess. Just got in my head a little bit last weekend. It’s not a big deal, aight?”

“Okay…” You breathe, the nagging want to ask if it’s okay if he can come over replacing the previous discomfort. “Is it alright if he does?”

“Yeah, baby. I'll give him a quick call when we off.”

“You sure?” You ask uneasily.

“You gotta relax, baby. I wouldn’t have introduced the two of you if I was worried… I never worry about you.” You take a deep breath, pressing it out slowly, listening to Rafe’s light laugh on the other end. “Stop worryin’, pretty.”

“Okay,” you whisper.

“C’mon... You’re my girl. I need you happy before I go out on the field or I'm not gonna be able to concentrate on shit.”

“I’m your girl,” you answer sweetly. “I’m fine. Just fine baby. I love you.”

“I love you too,” Rafe adds.

“I’m excited to watch you play,” you smile.

“Mmm… That’s my girl,” he hums. “I’ll call you when I get back to the hotel tonight. Shouldn’t be too late, aight?”

“Sounds perfect,” you reply.

The phone clicks off, leaving you with your thoughts in the apartment's quiet. Rafe’s trust was absolute, making everything much more complicated when you knew you were about to step outside your relationship without him knowing—especially now, discovering he had been okay with it all along.

You take a deep breath, trying to steady the storm inside you. Looking at the screen, you try your best to relax, smiling as you see your boyfriend’s face pop up.

After a while, the game was on, and Rafe was playing like a star. The commenters praised Rafe, his name coming through the speakers repeatedly, leaving your thoughts ping-ponging between both boys—back and forth, back and forth–the grip on your phone getting tighter by the second.

Buzz.

Cam: Out front

Your eyes widen as you see the notification, making all of those thoughts come to a screeching halt.

Just like you had guessed, Cam didn’t wait for your response, taking the Cameron approach to the matter, leaving you relieved and nervous, stressed and elated, completely fuckin’ torn as you walked to the door. Your body trembles with adrenaline as you grab the handle.

Rafe said it was ‘okay.’ So why am I still so nervous? You feel a familiar rush as you look into his beautiful eyes–that same feeling bubbling just under the surface as it had been night one.

“Hey, baby,” Cam smiles, his voice deep and warm. “M’sorry for just coming. You can tell me to fuck off. I just–I couldn’t wait any longer.” You swallow thickly as he steps closer, waiting for a response.

“It’s fine,” you whisper. “I’m sorry I didn’t respond. I just didn’t–” Your words get swallowed in a deep, uneasy breath.

“You didn’t know if Rafe would be okay with it,” he answers for you. You look up at him, feeling overwhelmed.

“Yeah…”

“I didn’t think he’d agree either, but he came around,” he assures you as he wraps his arm around your waist. You draw a sharp little breath, and before you can speak, he captures your lips in a tender kiss.

He chuckles breathily against your lips as he feels you tremble in his arms.

“You’re good, alright? We got you.”

You swallow the lump in your throat, looking up at him, your nails scratching into his tight buzz cut. “Okay.”

“Atta girl,” he soothes as his lips travel along your cheeks and neck, pressing gentle kisses on top.

“I missed you,” you whisper. He lets out a delighted groan, squeezing you as he lifts you off your feet into a hug.

“Fuck… I missed you too, sweetheart. Haven't stopped thinkin’ about you.”

“Neither have I.” You bury yourself in his arms for a few more moments.

“… Relax,” teases again, and you melt in his arms a little more. You let out a laborious laugh before drawing a deeper breath than you have in days. “Now let’s watch this jackass play ball, huh?” Cam sets you down on the ground, walking into the living room. His fingers stay laced in yours, eyes tracing your body as he follows you. “You look good. Fuck, you look pretty, baby,” he hums.

You let out a little gasp and a laugh as he crashes down on the couch, pulling you on top of him as the second half starts. He wraps you up in his big arms, your head resting on his muscular chest.

You listen to his level breathing and the steady beating of his heart as the game goes on. His big, rough fingers trace your spine lazily during commercial breaks, making your entire body feel electric from that simple touch alone.

You watch proudly as your boyfriend stands with the other team captain for the post-game interview, grinning ear to ear. The interviewer kicks it back to the ESPN studio, leaving Cam with your full attention.

The corners of Cam’s lips curl into the prettiest smile, making your stomach flutter. “Princess…” He mumbles as you rest your chin resting on his chest.

“Mhmm,” you hum.

“I don’t think I could have stayed away even if Rafe said ‘no,’” he whispers, his voice just above a hush. You can tell those words hadn’t left his lips easily— like he had been thinking about them since he left. And, like you, he knew that feeling that was wrong, too.

“Me either,” you breathe, answering honestly.

“We don’t need to tell him, alright?” He asks. “Can you keep that between you and me? I just don’t wanna have him get in the way of this– you and I. Of course, you two still have each other, but I think what we have is different.”

“I think so, too,” you whisper.

The post-game show droned on, and then the highlights of the day’s games, all just background noise as the two of you fell into a steady rhythm together: talking, joking, and snuggling as the warmth of his body pressed against yours. You could feel the connection between the two of you growing stronger, a bond you hadn’t anticipated this early hitting you hard and fast–absolutely impossible to forget.

Buzz.

You watch as your phone trembles on the coffee table with a new message from Rafe, letting you know he is back at the hotel and waiting. “It’s Rafe,” you beam; Cam’s expression softens as he brushes some hair off your face.

“Sounds good, baby…”

You step off the couch and walk toward the bedroom. Pulling open the laptop, you look across the room, fixing your hair and outfit in the mirror as Skype loads.

“Babygirl,” you hear Rafe cheer. His loud voice breaks the speakers a little, crackling in the feedback with his post-win excitement. You swoon, looking at the pretty boy on the other side of the screen. “Get the fuck out, Maybank,” he scoffs.

“What, you’re not gonna let me watch,” JJ smiles and winks as he sees you on Rafe’s end. Rafe shoves him out of focus–the two bickering back and forth, getting their jabs in between laughs. “Goodnight, sweetheart,’ JJ calls to you.

“Yeah, you too, bitch,” Rafe smiles, flicking off the cornerback as he continues to accost Rafe ‘til the door shuts, the room falling silent.

“Hey, princess!” Rafe hums in a deeper tone, glowing with pride and excitement.

“Fuck, baby. That was a good game,” you smile as you crawl closer.

He gets easily distracted, seeing you in his jersey, making your excitement rise as well. “Look at you,” he praises as he leans in a little closer.

“You look good too, baby. Is that new?” You giggle and wink, the man already knowing where you're going as you eye up his new sweatshirt.

“Yeah. Yeah. It’s all yours, baby,” he chuckles and his plays with the strings a little before pulling off the hood. “N’thank you, sweetheart. We did alright.”

“Alright?” You puff. “You were amazing.”

He laughs that laugh, running his fingers through his hair. “I wish I had you here to celebrate with me, pretty.” His tone softens as he looks at you; you can tell he means every word. You look over your computer, watching as Cam walks into the room and takes a seat atop the dresser. “Hate leavin’ you alone on a Saturday night,” your stomach falls, eyes fluttering at his words.

“Oh…” Your heart and mind start to race. “I wish I was there too.” Your voice breaks with adrenaline as you try to explain it away in your mind… Maybe he just means without him? Alone… without him?

“You should go out or somethin’... Get some air, have a little fun, get a drink for me. I’ll be home tomorrow, and we can celebrate then, okay?” You nod quickly, trying to push that uneasy feeling aside.

I mean, I got a call from him before the game… I talked to Rafe. Am I going fucking crazy?

“I’ll be fine,” you smile, feeling your lips tremble.

“Missed our pregame chat… And our post-game shower for sure,” he chuckles sleazily.

You look at Cam, he holds your gaze for a moment before burying his face in his hands. No.

“You doin’ okay, baby?” Rafe asks as he cocks his head slightly, looking back at you. “After last week n’all? Seems like you've had a lot on your mind.”

“Mhmm… m’fine,” you answer far too casually for how uneasy you look now.

“Good, baby. That’s good,” he smiles. “So, uhh... You still up for a little fun tonight, princess?”

Cam looks up to the ceiling, fighting his own internal battle. I mean, he lied… He pretended to be Rafe–his own brother, the man who told him to stay away. He throws his gaze back down to the floor, nodding to himself as he pulls himself to his feet, and right when he goes to step toward the door, you reach down, pulling Rafe’s jersey over your head, leaving you in nothing but a lace bra and panties, acting before you can even think it through.

His head turns toward you, and the man draws a deep breath as his eyes fall down your body, taking you in like the first time. Your eyes return to the computer screen, watching Rafe do the same. A deep moan comes through your speakers; his pretty blue eyes rolling back in his skull.

“Fuck, baby,” he sighs blissfully, tearing himself out of his shirt. You settle back down on the mattress, thighs spread wide as you look back at Rafe, watching out of the corner of your eye as Cam walks back, taking a more comfortable position on a chair as his darkened eyes lay set on you.

“Why did you stop, baby?” You ask Rafe, letting your eyes flick up to Cam’s as well, running on pure adrenaline. “Strip.”

Rafe chuckles darkly, and Cam smiles and bites his lip, catching the direction meant for both of them. Cam quickly pulls himself out of his shirt as well, making your mind swirl. You feel yourself growing wetter by the second, the chill of the wet lace clinging to your hot skin. And just like clockwork, the two boys pull down their pants, crashing back down onto the seat and the bed, their boxers tented out by their big cocks.

You bite your lip and smile as you reach behind your back, unclasping your bra and holding the lace to your chest as your hand shakes like a leaf, but you can’t stop. “You gonna be a tease, princess?” Rafe asks through a laugh. “M’not there to discipline you. You gonna test me, or are you gonna be a good girl?”

“Always a good girl for you, baby,” you whisper as you flick your bra to the floor.

“Fuck,” Rafe groans as he paws off his last bit of clothing, his long, thick clock hitting his tight abs with a smack as Cam quickly does the same. Goosebumps bloom across your skin and your body, riding an indescribable high. “Got that video, baby?” Rafe asks.

“Mhmm…” You prop up your phone on your computer, pushing play, listening to your soft giggle and Rafe's low moan swell through the phone’s tiny speaker.

“Do you have the video, baby?” You ask as your right-hand drifts between your thighs, rubbing your clit lightly through the fabric. You see a flicker of movement out of the top of your eyes as Cam licks his lips hungrily.

“‘Course I do, princess… I’ve been thinkin’ about it all fuckin’ day.”

Cam straightens up a little, his view obstructed by the laptop, desperately wanting to watch you play with your pussy. He stands up from his seat, his fat cock standing straight–his swollen head already leaking with precum sheened at the tip as he walks to the edge of the bed, taking a seat.

Your fingers work a little quicker, teasing both boys with what they can’t touch. Your head falls back, a soft moan leaving your lips with every even breath. You look down at Rafe, watching his big fist wrap around his thick cock, stroking slowly.

“Take off your panties, baby,” Rafe mumbles. You drag the wet material down your thighs, flicking them to Cam, making the beautiful boy take his bottom lip between his teeth as he runs the material through his big fingers. He rubs this thumb across the wetness, lifting it to his lips to suck it clean with his eyes on you.

“You look so pretty on camera, princess… Tell me why I’m takin’ my eyes off you again?” Rafe chuckles, his eyes dancing between you and the home movie on his phone, the man on Cloud 9.

“I love having your attention, Daddy,” you smile as you glide your fingers wet through your slick folds, “gets me wet,” you tease as you bring them back up to your clit hating yourself for how comfortable you feel—not hating yourself enough to quit.

“So fuckin’ dirty, princess. I love it,” he hums as he starts to stroke his dick a little faster, getting off at the sight of you, spitting on his cock for lube.

Your eyes shift slightly, biting back as you smile as Cam wraps the pretty lace around the base of his thick length, hissing at the contact as he wraps himself tight. You can feel yourself getting wetter by the second, the boys holding back their sounds just to hear more of it as they watch you close.

You lean out of the screen, reaching into the nightstand, pulling out a vibrator, showing it off for the camera. “Fuck, baby,” Rafe hums as he adjusts slightly, forgoing the video altogether as he catches a glimpse of your toy, “you’re killin’ me.” You look up at Cam, the desperation in his eyes, fighting back his praise and pleasured sounds with his life.

“Babygirl,” Rafe murmurs as his eyes rake over your naked body, the tip of the vibrator replacing your fingers on your sex. “Stop fuckin’ with me.” Chills fall down your spine as you hear Rafe’s deep, commanding voice.

“What do you want, Rafe?” You ask breathily as you push it a little deeper between your thighs, tracing your slit before showing it to the boys; the head drenched with your wetness.

“Shittt… Turn it on,” he mumbles as his breathing quickens, the gold chain on his chest catching the light.

“Yes, Daddy,” you turn it on, making a show of it as the length of it twirls and shakes. You can feel how drenched you are, your drooling hole leaking down your inner thigh. You gasp as the silicone tip meets your plush skin, tracing through the mess before lifting your eyes to Rafe.

“Push it in, pretty.” You gasp as the vibrations hit your clit, muscles jolting from the contact, that shock quickly turning into pleasure. Your thighs tremble as you ghost the tip over your puffy clit, pussy clenching around nothing. “Fuckin’ push it in,” Rafe moans. “Damn, you’re evil for this, baby. Shit… Just wait for tomorrow night I fuckin’ swear-”

“Shit!” You squeal; both boys’ moans cancel each other out as you stuff the toy inside your aching core. Your eyes shift between Rafe and Cam as they work their fists over their throbbing dicks.

“Play with that shit. C’mon, baby. C’mon,” Rafe pleads through a deep groan as he watches you close.

“So pretty, baby. Shit, you look so damn good,” Cam mumbles under his breath as he watches the toy fuck in and out of you, keeping your pace with your strokes.

You let out a hoarse cry as you find your g-spot, the little vibrating nub pressing against your clit perfectly. Your breathing starts to quicken with your heart, the knot in your stomach growing tighter and tighter. Your eyes clamp shut as you feel yourself about to near your peak.

“Open your eyes, baby. M’gonna cum… Fuck. I’m gonna cum for you,” Rafe hums. Your orgasm hits you fast, washing over you like a wave. You watch the screen as Rafe strokes a few more times before letting his thick cock go, pulsing as he cums in ropes landing hot on his abs as he pants like a dog.

Cam bites his lips, wrapping his fist around the delicate lace, pulling it down to his tip. His head falls back as he empties himself into the lace. His ab muscles clench as his heavy load dirties your panties, making an absolute mess of the fabric.

The three of you breathe heavily, coming down from your highs together. A broad smile spreads across Rafe’s lips as he tilts his head back, hitting the hotel headboard with a soft thud. “Mmm… Get on your back, baby,” Rafe hums. “You're cummin’ again.”

“Yeah?” You ask with a breathless laugh as you look between Rafe and the video playing on the phone, watching Rafe throw you to the mattress and plunge back in fast.

“Yeah, princess. Wanna hear you cum with yourself. Better hurry up, sweetheart. Sounds like you’re close,” he smiles smugly as you lay down on the bed, starting up the vibrator, your thighs, pussy still quaking from your first orgasm.

Your eyes widen as you look between your thighs, watching Cam take it off your hands before pushing it inside for you. You cry out, back arching off the mattress as he works it in at the perfect angle, the head of the vibration swirls against your g-spot, vibrator flicking at your clit.

“Fuck, you can take dick like a pornstar. Can't you princess?” Rafe praises—his cock still hard, as he shifts his focus between the old video and the pleasure on your face, the rest of your body cut off from the lens as Cam works the toy in and out.

Your bottom lip pouts and trembles in overstimulation as fat tears roll down your hot cheeks. You look down at Cam, scratching your nails into his buzzed hair. His eyes rake up your body, landing on your lips, licking his own—no doubt thinking about his dick sliding in and out and your lips on him.

He turns up the speed to the max, making you fight against him slightly, but he grabs your body, pinning you to the mattress.

“Are you gonna cum, princess?” Rafe drawls, and you nod rapidly. “Good fuckin’ girl. Give it to me.”

“Mhmm,” is all you can muster. “Fuck!” You whine as your damn breaks, pleasure coursing through your body as you flutter around the vibrator, cumming in tandem with the video of yourself.

Cam pulls out the vibrator, making you gasp. He flattens his tongue, licking a line up your silk, causing you to whimper pathetically as he works you through your high. Cam curls his arms, forcing you closer as he locks onto your puffy clit, sucking and flicking his tongue; feeling yourself close to a third release but you trap him between your thighs, throwing him daggers with your gaze.

“Fuck–Fuck, JJ. What the hell?” Rafe calls as you hear the door push open on Rafe’s end, making all three of you jump. Your hand clamps over your lips, as you watch your boyfriend, do his best to cover himself up while his teammate cackles. “Knock on the goddamn door,” he barks.

“Forgot my wallet,” JJ says, his voice on the edge of laughter.

Rafe covers himself more, putting his big hand up to the camera as JJ pops his head in, grabbing his wallet off the nightstand. “I’ll fuckin’ kill you,” Rafe hisses, only half-kidding, but you’re already covered up with a blanket anyway. His eyes track JJ as he walks away, heading out the door.

“Goddamn…” Rafe mutters as he pulls back the dirtied duvet, eyeing the mess. “How many more guys am I gonna have to fight off you today?” He huffs.

Cam looks over his shoulder slightly as he pulls back on his sweats. You can see it in his eyes, Cam hit with the bitter taste of guilt. Rafe smiles at you lovingly, utterly oblivious to the war in your mind and his brother in the room.

“Rafe-”

“I’ll see you tomorrow, princess. I love you,” he cuts you off before you go to speak, seconds away from spilling your guts. Maybe it’s for the best…

“I love you too,” you whisper, hearing the slight crack in your voice.

You grab the top of your laptop, pulling it shut, your heart banging in your ears as the weight of the situation starts to pile on you. You felt a rush of panic flood through you—not knowing whether to laugh or cry.

What the fuck did I just do?

⭐part 4 coming soon⭐

tags: @rafesthroatbaby @littlelamy @kisses4angels @watchmerora @buckybarnessweetheart @anamiad00msday @namelesslosers @cades-outsider @romaescapes @starkeysprincess @oxpogues4lifexo @unrealmirrorball @sleepiibunniiii @gri959 @rafesgiirl @daryldixon83 @akobx @hyperfixationgirl @lhhlver @rrafeswhore @slut-4-gojo @blair-bears-blog @loveesiren @cameronwillow @rafegf-real @alphabetically-deranged @ariana2saucyy @rafestoothbrush

[tellywoodtrash]

immj2 20.10.20 lb

great, the memory card has fallen off aryan's shoe onto the floor. can't wait to see it kicked and passed around the house like the heere in andaz apna apna ka climax.

a wholeass pailllllllll of nails chachi has, and she knocked it over, and now she's scooped the memory card and put it with the nails. abbe yaaaaaaaaar.

dadi is a little too fida on this bahu. hello, you have other grandchildren in this house too? yes ok most of them other than siya suck, but still!!!! angre ko toh itna laad nahi deti aap??? i would argue he deserves it more, having to handle two-two sankiii raisinghania siblings. 

lehenga waala controversy ki hawwwwwww vansh ki maa ka lehenga kaise pehen liya tumneeeeeee, and riddhima's like bishhhhhh my man gave it to meeee.

btw i think it's rude af that vansh got haq over it and not ishani and siya. i would totally not let a brother give away my mom's payal AND lehenga to some chick he married coz he thought she was a shady bitch here to spy on the fam. HE DIDN'T EVEN MARRY HER COZ HE LOVED HER OR NOTHING!!!!!!! WHY DOES SHE GET OUR MOM'S STUFF?!?!?!!?!? WHO MADE HIM THE BEQUEATHER OF HER HEIRLOOMS????????

long story short, i agree with ishani's bitchface here.

face-off between saas bahu over whether vansh will show up for aarti. lordddddddddddd, y'all better off betting on shit like the ipl, at least kuch toh paise mil jaate usmein.

full raisinghania parivaar convinced ki nahi aayega vansh.

but oh????????? YEH KISKI HAI AAAHAT???????? YEH KISA HAI SAAYA?????????

boooooooooooyah in your faces, bitches. though mans looks like he'd rather wrestle a pack of wild dogs than be doing this. HE'S HERE. THAT'S WHAT MATTERS.  

behold the power of heterosexual crushy-wushy feelings (triple-boosted by the power of maa ka lehenga.)

mann hi mann mein gutargooo. god, just rip off the beautiful clothes and fuckkkk, you idiots. it's what maata rani wants!

OK BLOODY ENOUGH STARING THIS SCENE HAS LITERALLY GONE ON FOR 3 MINUTES TOO LONG, AARTI BHI KARNI HAI KI NAHI?!?! WHO ARE THESE PPL WHO STAND AROUND SUSTAINING EYE CONTACT LIKE THIS MY SOCIALLY ANXIOUS ASS IS FUCKING DYINGGGG HERE FROM JUST WATCHING THIS

dude turns on the puppy eyes only when she's not looking.

waaaaaah! look who's enjoying aarti! while smize-flirting with wife.

inn meesniyon ko baaz nahi aana. this is the fucking stupidest shit i've ever seen. WHY WOULD YOU MAKE A BED OF NAILS?????? DON'T YOU KNOW THAT THE MORE THE NUMBER OF THE NAILS PACKED CLOSELY TOGETHER, IT PROVIDES A FOUNDATION THAT ALLOWS EVEN WEIGHT DISTRIBUTION AND THUS DOESN'T HURT?????? USKE UPER CARPET BHI DAAL DIYA. SO HOW IS THIS SHIT SUPPOSED TO WORK, LIKE AT ALLLLL????

also idk wtf dushmani this family has against riddhima's poor feet ki unko hi nishaana banaate hain har time. poori ki poori body padi hui hai behen ki, kahin aur bhi vaar kiya karo, variety ke liye?!?

bhakti waala boner.

kal hi maine bola tha ki isko dandiya mat dena. angre inviting his own shaamat.

literally everyone in the family has their own different style of taking aarti.

aarti given to aryan with an extra side of stinkeye and promise to put him in jail.

voot has muted all the bloody songs and replaced it with some generic music and goddddddd. i have to go download some stream from tv now to watch the dance sequences properly. literally what is the point of voot’s existense, someone tell me. itnaaaa ghatiya streaming platform nahi dekha maine aaj tak. they should be paying us to watch shit on their trash site.

this is the most non-enthu dandiya playing i have seen in my life. he's standing there as if his shoes have been nailed to the ground. ffs, siya, who's in a wheelchair has more zeal.

his bejaan dancing reminded her of the other inanimate object that is priority as of the moment: the memory card.

aaaaaaaaaaand she hit him on the hand, and he walked off mooh phula ke that she wasn't paying attn. GOD EVERYONE IN THIS SHOW IS SO FUCKING ANNOYING.

meanwhile this one also got her hands on the bucket of nails. lordddddddddddddddddddd. i just can't with these ppl anymore.

yeh lo, yeh phir aa gayi maata rani se favour maangne.

FROM 0-60 IN A SECOND THIS ONE'S BRAIN MAKES ASSUMPTIONS. DIMAAG HAI YA TESLA KA ENGINE?!?!!?

inka khatam nahi hua. itna dimaag padhaai likhaai mein lagaati aap log toh khud ki companyaan chalaate, aur vansh ke paise ki zaroorat nahi padti.

ishani literally hammered nails into her bloody dandiya to hit angre with, who tf she think she is, jeffrey dean morgan from the walking dead?!?!!?!?!?!

hein???? riddhima ko itne upar se bucket mein memory card dikh gaya??? is she a long-lost cheel sister from naagin 5???? (maine bola tha this show is a companion piece to that one!!!)

i really truly get ishani’s annoyance with this b. she’s very very very irritating.

“isse kahin safe jagaah chupaana hoga” she says, AND YET AGAIN PUTS IT SOMEWHERE TOTALLY DUMB, THAT SHE WOULDN'T REALIZE IF IT FELL TF OUT. WHYYYYYYYY IS SHE LIKE THIS?!!?!?!?!?!? JUST WHY??????????

I MEAN........... JUST GO HIDE IT WHEREVER YOU KEEP YOUR MENSTRUAL PRODUCTS????? LITERALLY NO ONE WILL TOUCH THOSE, ESP. VANSH/ARYAN. IT'S THE LAST PLACE THEY'D EVEN THINK TO LOOK. MY GOD WHY IS SHE SO INFURIATINGLY STUPID??????????

garba ke baad she wants to show vansh the footage. wonderful. should go great.

mummyji ka naatak to make riddhima take the akhand jyot. fwding.

if there's anyone who's MORE of a doe-eyed optimistic fool than riddhima in this house, it's angre.

god ishani, you're a horrible person.

ofc, isko hero banna hai. keel ko poora daboch hi liya haath mein.

great, he's like tum ziddi toh main bhi dheent. re bhagwaaaaaaaan.

pls god, let them pair siya with someone wholesome; nahi toh i'll not have a single couple to ship in this generation of raisinghanias.

lmaooooooo dandiya kam yeh toh fencing match zyaada lag raha hai.

husband was just saying sorry to apologize for bumping into her but OH HO HO HO HO PATIDEV KABHI MAAFI KYUN MAANGEEEEEEEE PARMESHWAR SE TOH GALTIYAAN NAHI HOTIIIIIIIIIIII

one ainvayi ka ~~deep~~~~~~ dialogue also, that made no fucking sense but ok whatever.

LMAO WHUT THE DANCING CAME OUTTA FUCKING NOWHERE I AM AS PUZZLED AS VANSH IS

also everyone's like baaju hato baaju hato iske khatarnaak dancing se already vansh ko lag chuki ek baar abhi humein nahi khaani

i am ishani and aryan, pissed at how this chick just be hogging the whole floor. hello, this is a communal garba space!!!?!!

also i fucking love nagada sang dhol, but solo dancing to this song just looks very very sad.

anyway, now that the cultural program part of the evening is over......... time for operation keel carpet.

this chachi is such a sample i swear to godddddddd. iske khurafaati dimaag mein full time aise nonsense ideas hi aatein hain. aunty, apply this time and effort into an mba or msw or something, and you'd be much better off in life.

for the love of god stop making this dude run unless its some legit chase sequence or something. he looks ridiculous running around in the house as if he's trying to break the world record for 400m.

Bhakti Boner round 2.

chalo, finally she's on her way to the room. in dono ke kaleje ko thandak.

once again, for those at home thinking of replicating this kaand to fuck over an annoying nanad/bhaabi/whatever: please read how a bed of nails works, so that you don't waste your time on it.

why's everyone watching her go up as if ISRO ne koi naya satellite launch kiya ho??? DO Y'ALL NOT HAVE WIFI IN THIS HOUSE??????? MATLAB, KUCH BHIIIIIIIII ENTERTAINMENT NAHI HAI KYA ISS GHAR MEIN RIDDHIMA KE ALAAVA????

issne toh mann mein jann gann mana bhi gaana shuru kar diya, outta pride.

HOW EVEN IS SHE BLEEDING FROM THE FOOT WHEN KEELON KE UPAR CARPET HAI?????????? KUCHHHHHHHHH BHI.

[heartate-aa]

i am dragging everyone down with me oh my god i’m obsessed.  stuck with u is actually like.  literally.  literally the PEAK.  of ezreal and ahri and the pinnacle of the concept of their beginnings of fake dating and then suddenly it’s just all too real and oh my goddddddd why didn’t i think of this before

like this part.  is so.  ahri.  ugh.  it’s the way ezreal can run his mouth and talk about anything and ahri is laying in bed staring at him with the most endeared,  enamoured eyes and she won’t move.

got all this time on our hands might as well cancel our plans,  yeah i could stay here for a lifetime so,  lock the door and throw out the key can't fight this no more,  it's just you and me and there's nothin' i,  nothin' i,  i can do i'm stuck with you,  stuck with you,  stuck with you so,  go ahead and drive me insane baby,  run your mouth,  i still wouldn't change

AND THEN.  THIS PART BEING EZREAL  ?? 

there's nowhere we need to be,  no,  no,  no i'ma get to know you better kinda hope we're here forever there's nobody on these streets if you told me that the world's endin' ain't no other way that I can spend it

like.  they’re so stupid ugh.  they really came into this relationship under the idea and pretense that it was going to be fully fake and just for fun and publicity,  and it was good publicity,  and god were all of ahri’s stans so fucking upset with her both at the fact that she was dating ezreal who they felt wasn’t good enough for her and the fact that . . . ahri is no longer single,  when in reality she was.  but,  then . . . ezreal smiled at her too many times.  he made her laugh too many times.  caught her chin too many times,  caught the small of her back too many times and held her a little bit too close,  kissed her a little bit too well,  and she felt that dizzying dance in the pit of her stomach and a flutter in her heart.  he was a little too charming,  a little too kind,  a little too sincere and genuine where it shouldn’t have felt so real but it did,  and ahri knew it wasn’t real but she wanted it to be so badly.

i’m screaming.  this song just.  did it for me.  i’m so.  AAAAAAAAAAAAAA I CAN’T COPE  !!  I DON’T KNOW HOW TO COPE ANYMORE

[beaniegyu]

20 questions ✨

tagged by: @jjinyounf

1: What do you prefer to be called name-wise?

any variation of my name is fine. i used to hate being called by my full name, and although i don’t love it, i don’t really mind it that much anymore.

2: When is your Birthday?

october 20th

3: Where do you live?

i live in argentina, not far from the capital, buenos aires.

4: Three things you are doing right now?

i’m doing homework for my italian class, planning tomorrow’s lessons and answering this quiz thingy.

5: Four fandoms that have peaked your interest.

mmmm like right now? i don’t think i can name four lmao. i’m gonna mention the three i’m currently very interested in: got7, seventeen and haikyuu.

6: How has the pandemic been treating you?

it’s been tough, not gonna lie. i went from working outside all day to working the same amount of hours at home and it’s not something i enjoy that much. i’ve got used to it by now, but i just wish we could go back to how the world was before this happened.

7: A song you can’t stop listening to right now?

i can’t stop me by twice.

8: Recommend a movie.

freedom writers.

9: How old are you?

just turned 26.

10: School, university, occupation, other?

i’m a teacher and i work full time. i’m also going back to school next year to pursue a degree in graphic design.

11: Do you prefer heat or cold?

cold, all the way. i respect people who like summer, but why on earth do you wanna sweat and sleep uncomfortably? 🤪

12: Name one fact others may not know about you.

i used to write fiction, a loooooooot. i don’t really talk about my writer phase anymore, but i do open the occasional google docs and try to get back into it.

13: Are you shy?

not really. i’m not an in-your-face extrovert, but i’m also not shy.

14: Preferred pronouns?

she/her

15: Biggest Pet Peeves?

men who make or laugh at sexist jokes. god, it sends me into a rage filled frenzy

16: What is your favorite “dere” type?

goddddddd i’m not familiar enough with them to choose 😫

17: Rate your life from 1-10, 1 being crappy and 10 being the best it could be.

8. i like to try and stay as positive as i can overall even in the face of shitty stuff that i’ve gone through.

18: What’s your main blog?

this is it, baby.

19: List your side blogs and what they’re used for.

@aletheiah is my aesthetic tumblr. i’m not good at keeping up with multiple blogs, though, so i mostly post on here. i’m also a @got7creators admin 💚

20: Is there something people need to know about you before becoming friends?

initiating isn’t my forte, but i sure do talk a lot once someone gives me the chance.

tagging: @flowerbeom @dustofinsanity @offtodef @alrightyaphroditie @luvhannie @minghaosbitch @xuseokgyu @yeeun

[capmerthur]

@destinyandcoins #ok ok ok so these are all devastating. for a variety of reasons #special shout out to my boy ''i swear i will protect you or die at your side'' #not ONLY because it's my otp tag for them (from before the finale actually aired 🙃) #but also!! he didn't!! he swore he would protect him OR die at his side! and he did neither!!! #hahah isn't that funny. isn't that grand #isn't that g r e a t #but also. oh my god. i'm sorry but i have to go with ''i know arthur better than i know myself'' #because. it's TRUE #EVERYTHING about merlin is about arthur. everything he does is for him #to the point that merlin is tying himself into knots to keep arthur happy and safe as a priority above even bringing magic back to camelot #he doesn't know who he is or what his purpose is without arthur #he hasn't had a chance to know himself fully #but he can filter things through the lens of what arthur would do or expect or need or want #because That's Who He Is #and THAT is the wildest thing he's ever said. #not the heartfelt declarations of what arthur means to him or what he'd do for him. not even when those come so early in their friendship #but the fact that he says he knows arthur better than he knows himself. and he MEANS IT #goddddddd #(also. i want you to imagine for a moment the agony i felt typing that tag for the 1st time after the finale aired. ok. just imagine my pai #do you know what that did to me? to have picked that quote as meaningful enough to represent their relationship. #and then sit through that finale. and grieve. and process. and then go to type that tag again and realize merlin broke that promise #ok. thank you. i just needed someone else to know what i went through in that moment. to understand the agony i'm in every time i use it) @agapantoblu #Okay but it's ''I know Arthur better than I know myself'' #Like all the others are cold facts honestly but this one? What do you mean babe! #You've been staring so obsessively you could paint every detail to the smallest of wrinkles blindfolded #And in the process of looking at him you lost sight of yourself as anything other than a tool of prophecy #Also unbelievably ironic because Merlin knows Arthur better than himself and Arthur also does know himself better than he knows Merlin #On account of the fact that he knows so very little about Merlin and most of it are lies #Delicious. 100% most insane thing to say #And it's not even in context of a deep confession to Arthur or anything! My man really dropped this line in a casual conversation! Absurd @followtheechoes #honestly its probably 'i know arthur better than i know myself' #because merlin knows himself very well when he first arrives #maybe he doesnt know his limits yet but he knows he hasnt tested them and he knows he's eager to try #and he knows what hes willing to stand up and stop #he doesnt know himself anymore!! but he knows arthur!!! @retro-wallflower #i almost chose i was born to serve u coz come on saying u live for them wow #but had to go with his life is worth a hundred of mine 😭😭 #merlin and his crippling lack of self worth will be the death of me @adhd-merlin WAIT A SECOND WHERE IS "I HAVE MAGIC. AND I USE IT FOR YOU ARTHUR. ONLY FOR YOU" CANT BELIEVE I FORGOT ABOUT THAT ONE #merlin telling lancelot magic isn't part of him. he IS magic. #do you get it!!!!!!! #oh i almost missed this!! thank you ellie <3 #torn between n.6 and n.7 #but i went with 6 because i remember thinking “wild thing to say” as i watched #i mean not that “I was born to serve you” is any less wild but you know. the prophecy and stuff #there is some plausible deniability in there #also “i'm sorry I had to leave you. I didn't want to. I hope one day you'll understand why” (ep 5x12) #hit me hard like #he's pressed for time. literally in a life or death situation. needs to convey an urgent message to save arthur's life #first thing out of his mouth: “I'm sorry I had to leave you I didn't want to” #baby 🥺!!!!! #for all he knew that was the last time he got the chance to speak to arthur #and he needed him to know he didn't want to leave him

[lihikainanea]

Can we talk about those sad submissive nights? Where Tiger is exhausted, just wanting Bill to dominate her, and he ends up agreeing to fuck her throat. She has tears falling down her face from intensity, he knows she needs to let it out but it worries him because he’s Good Dude. He wants to make her feel good so he ignores her sad noises as he pulls away and lifts her on the bed. Laying her on the bed, she’s just squirming, trying to get back on the floor, but he soothes her..

Oh goddddddd my soft heart.

Listen, I think when tiger’s in her right mind, I think Bill has no issues with putting her on her knees and having some fun with it. Because he knows that she can take it, he knows that she’s going to enjoy it, he knows that she’s feeling pretty ballsy and sexy and is all for it.

But there’s also times when she needs that action, as strange of a comfort as it is, even when Bill doesn’t think she’s in the best head space for it. He goes by her, and her actions, and while sometimes she most definitely will ask for things that he doesn’t think she’s in the right space for and will lightly refuse, sometimes she’ll ask for things he doesn’t think she’ll be okay with but that she just...she needs. And she’ll tell him why she needs it, how it’ll help, and Bill can’t refuse her then. He’ll be extremely careful, he’ll be watching her the whole time to make sure she’s not slipping, but ultimately Bill knows that tiger relies on him for certain things and that he needs to trust that she’s asking him for what she truly needs. And that it would be way worse for him to deny her of it.

But I love what you mentioned--he’s still Good Dude, you know? So when she’s already really small on him, when she’s already maybe kind of slipping into a bad headspace, it’s hard to convince him that she needs this. Needs him to be rough, needs to kind of be choked and held there as tears stream down her face. You’re right in that he probably starts it off soft, tries to get her settled on the bed under pillows on pillows and blankets and doesn’t take control, kind of just lets her do her thing--but it’s not enough. And he no sooner gets her set up that she’s squirming again, whining a bit, trying to push off and get on the floor. She manages too, none too gracefully and probably a little painfully, and she grabs at him to pull him closer to the end of the bed so she can stay on the floor and still have him.

“Easy kid,” he soothes, and he picks her back up and puts her on the soft bed, “Like this, sweet girl.”

But that just won’t do. Tiger makes a little sad noise, fusses,  wriggles back off the bed and onto her knees. And she reaches for him again, is really quite frantic about it, and Bill grabs her face right as she dives for him. There’s no use in fighting it anymore, he thinks, but he does need to make sure that she’s okay, and that she knows what to say if it’s too much.

“Tiger,” he says sternly, and he waits for her to look at him.

“Yes?” he asks for confirmation. She nods.

“And what do you say if it’s too much?”

She runs her lips along him, and he sucks in a breath.

“Pineapple,” she murmurs.

“And if you can’t talk?” he asks.

“I’ll pinch your thigh,” she says,

“Show me.”

And she does.

And listen, Good Dude Bill--he gives in. He probably doesn’t 100% want to because he worries, but he gives in. And he lets tiger put his hands on the side of her head, he lets her push down on them to show him how she wants him to do it. And I’m sure it’s a battle for him, because she looks like a hot mess--she’s crying, fussing, whining, and it’s hard for him to believe that this is actually helping her--but it is. And he just needs to trust that if it’s not, then she’ll stop him.

[haunting-all-of-my-what-ifs]

updating as I listen to the album:

the 1: just stabbed me in the face

cardigan: is incredibly delicate I love it

the last great american dynasty: is a funky little number - that beat though. haha she said ‘it’s becky’.

exile: HAS STABBED ME VERY EARLY ON RIP ME HOLY SHI- “you’re not my homeland anymore” BYE TO ANY SHRED OF STABILITY I HAD. so far this my favourite.

my tears ricochet: “if I’m dead to you why are you at the wake cursing my name?” my tears do be ricocheting off my phone screen though

mirrorball: ohh..oooo... I can see it happening, I can see it all playing out in my head

seven: ok lana del rey vibes

august: ooooo a lil BOP....oh ok a stab in the heart bop - “back when I was living for the hope of it all” “cancelled my plans just in case you called”, just got called out thanks for that taylor.

this is me trying: right ok I’m five words in and I’m dead. OH “got wasted like all of my potential” DIDNT HAVE TO CALL ME OUT THAT HARD. tears are falling. coming for the favourite spot.

illicit affairs: starting out cute and delicate - she really said heartbreak hits but make it fairy. “doWN” “stOp” “hIM” “hIGh”. LOOK AT THIS IDIOTIC FOOL THAT YOU MADE - same energy as “I’m a crumpled up piece of paper lying here”

invisible string: it is dawning on me around this song there is a shit ton of lyrics in this album and we have our work cut out to learn them. the high notes + the storytelling lyrics + the melody = emotionally unstable. I love the colours so freakin much.

mad woman: OM- she said “fuck you”. wow WOW. she said let’s add a bit of fairy spice to IDSB and TIWWCHNT. ok I have some theories for this one and I’m sure y’all have got similar ones.

epiphany: “OH”. “sir I think he’s bleeding out”. “mothER”. “doc I think she’s crashing out” - correct, have been for a while and I’m not ok. “just one single glimpse of relief to make some sense of what you’ve seen” is making me relativity unstable. IT SOUNDS LIKE A HOSPITAL HEART RATE BEEPER THING DO YOU HEAR IT TOO?

betty: she said harmonica rights. oh my goddddddd “would you tell me to go fuck myself” what a mood. taylor I’m hearing a gay anthem I won’t lie - HERE. FOR. IT. oh wait- is this from a guys perspective? did I hear that right? I DONT KNOW BUT ITS A BOP. you belong with me but matured like a fine wine. OK THIS IS CREEPING ON FAVOURITE SPOT.

peace: currently upset because there’s only two songs left. “the rain is always going to come if you’re stood with me” “would it be enough if I could never give you peace *insert big sad face*

hoax: oh fucking hell. “stood on the cliff side screaming give me a reason”. gut wrenching masterpiece. taylor are you ok? I want to give you a hug :(

[harryseyebrows]

Maybe he's like 9 or 10? Like old enough that starting to feel like he needs to start becoming "a man" even though he's obv still a child lol. But he just suffers through it all day and partway through the night until it's Real Bad and he goes from 0 to 100 and starts screaming for Jeff in the middle of the night.

goddddddd so harry would be working an overnight shift and jeff is home alone with the kids. he wakes up around 2am, looks at the clock, and tries to go back to sleep. but then he hears why he was woken up in the first place -- one of the boys calling for him. and they dont really do that anymore, since the twins are almost 10 and river is almost 9. 

so jeff is out of bed in an instant, trying to figure out which one of them it is. he checks the bedrooms but eli and river are both sound asleep still. then he notices that the kids’ bathroom light it on, a faint yellow glow being cast onto the hardwood floor from the crack underneath it where it’s closed. 

“jude! bud, are you okay?” 

he thinks jude responds, but it’s muffled by the door. jeff opens it and finds jude practically collapsed against the toilet, pale and sweaty and very much not himself. 

“hey. hey, whats the matter? what’s wrong?” he picks jude’s head up and is immediately alarmed by how warm he is, the way his eyes are unfocused and bloodshot. his own hands are shaking, but he can’t panic. he can’t. “jude. sweetheart, can you hear me? i just need to go get my phone. i’ll be right back.” 

jude groans and dry heaves, and as much as it kills jeff to leave him, he runs out of the bathroom and immediately calls 911. because he knows this is serious, that it isn’t just a bellyache or a virus. there’s no way. he’s never seen anyone this sick before, and its scaring the shit out of him but his kid needs him, so he scoops jude up and very carefully brings him downstairs where he settles him on the couch until the ambulance gets there. 

he calls him mom next, praying that she actually answers him after the fifth ring, but then her voice is on the other end, blearily asking, “jeffrey? is everything okay?” 

jeff swallows thickly, nearly chokes on his own words. “mom, jude is sick and i need you to come stay with the kids while i take him to the hospital. i already called 911.” 

he hears her sharp intake of breath, can only imagine how she’s sitting up in bed, wide awake now. “i’ll be there in five.” 

after they hang up, jeff squats down so he can be eye-level with jude. “just sit tight, bud. there’s an ambulance on the way. you’re gonna be alright,” jeff says, and he doesn’t know who he’s trying to convince more, jude or himself. 

[squijim]

thoughts on episode three!

Overall rating: 8

my therapist: flowy green oracle! gabe isn't real, he can't hurt you.

flowy green oracle! gabe: yOu sHaLL gO wEsT—

nah bc what was that cgi and why did they do my girl medusa's hair like that !!

"I picked her because i thought we could never be friends" confused me. not because it's another deviation from the plot, because i didn't mind that, but because there wasn't enough foundation in the pilot episodes to make him feel that way? she pushes him to get claimed, and says vague things about stalking... but they don't have a serious argument or anything. how is annabeth more impossible than clarisse in tv!percy's mind? furthermore, "i picked you because i knew you'd always have my back" is different when tv! percy and grover aren't close anymore... i don't see why percy would choose him as an infallible friend if the plot was changed so that grover would get him kicked from yancy and percy hasn't forgiven him yet. it could've been expanded on more.

the bus scene could've used more suspense... i feel like it started off interesting, seeing annabeth discover the presence of the furies. that's a nice detail the books weren't able to add since it was originally percy's pov. it could've been expanded on !! percy hijacking the bus, it blowing up, the furies stalking down the aisle, and most importantly: "where is it!" i think annabeth being able to talk to alecto was cool but at the same time it detracted from the mystery element. i think them making a more subtle escape also detracts from the national headlines of "teens fistfight elderly women" which gabe pedals in the books... is it necessary? no. but do i want that so we can have percy tell everyone to get a free appliance at the end? absolutely.

same with medusa!! i feel like the recurring theme with this episode was the writers expecting most of the viewers to know the plot beforehand, so skipping the suspense in favor of worldbuilding to appease fans who already know the material, but it misses out on the original intrigue that drew first-time viewers in. yeah alecto and medusa knowing each other is cool, but that's something you save for a few books down the line, let alone a few chapters, when we get to know them both separately first.

WITH THAT SAID HOWEVER, what i do think is interesting is percy's compassion being highlighted in this scene rather than his recklessness. the book had a good mix of both, his sympathy for aunty em but desire to prove annabeth wrong. i think percy boldly wanting to hear medusa's side of the story out is really compelling and having medusa be a voice for kronos's army is great!! medusa as sally's foil but then sally uses her to get revenge on gabe... CHEF'S KISS. while i think i prefer the original sequence, and i think the movie — surprisingly — did a much better job in having the characters explore the creepy gardens, the suspense in the show was def. well-executed in the kitchen scene. the underground basement is creepy as hell.

the thalia and grover reveal was kinda weird? i feel like it could've been more emotional... but idk! i don't want to judge too soon.

"i killed her sister." "i cut off her head". oh my god. oh my goddddddd

"I AM IMPERTINENT" AHHHH HE SAID THE LINE!! AND THE BOX MESSAGE WAS ACCURATE WHICH WAS ON SCREEN FOR 0.2 SECONDS BUT STILL

the lin manuel reveal was so??? y'all idfk

better than the pilot i thought! action scenes could've been more developed but the character dynamics were great :) this episode was a lot of fun!

some initial thoughts on the pjo premier!!

[SPOILERS AHEAD FOR EP. 1&2]

Overall rating for the premier: 7/10

a lot of the departures from the original text felt unnecessary to me:

GABE — like most people have said, this version of gabe feels... benign. the book does a great job of setting the scene for percy's home when he comes home from Yancy: a bunch of greasy men, farting and burping and insulting each other watching a game, surrounded by trash, on a sofa. gabe demands money for the taxi and insults percy ("i wouldn't act so snooty, brainboy") to his face, before percy goes into his bedroom and sees old magazines, empty beer cans, dirty sneakers, and general misuse of his space due to gabe. this gabe feels harmless? the fact that he has control over tv!sally's phone is an interesting new detail, but this angle is glossed over almost immediately.

the most impactful part of gabe's character is that sally made the sacrificing of withstanding verbal, emotional, financial, AND physical abuse (percy talks about gabe's "guy secret" i.e. punching his lights out if he doesn't pay him, him realizing gabe probably hits sally) to protect percy, but given that tv!sally argues back, does not compromise to appease him, doesn't help the audience understand that relationship right away. in some ways, i feel like movie!gabe was more accurate in this way; he slaps sally's ass showing a blatant disrespect for her, and has a more aggressive relationship with percy, which while maybe more extreme, is more accurate to book!gabe and percy's confusion and indignance at their relationship. as far as current tv!gabe, it doesn't feel like the medusa head is an appropriate, measured response nor does it feel like the only tool at sally's disposal to escape.

GROVER — Grover betraying Percy feels so unneeded? Grover, later on in the episode, says he needed to expel Percy from Yancy to protect him from more monsters finding him... but this foundation hasn't been laid for it to feel real. Not only does Grover not know this information, but it feels disingenuous considering we've never seen any other indications that monsters are actively hunting percy aside from Mrs. Dodds; the books mention a snake slithering into his crib, a cyclops stalking him on a playground, but pjotv omits this entirely... so Grover's warning doesn't add up. The tv show, in my opinion, could've left this play out exactly as it did in the book... which leads me to my next point:

SALLY — Women don't have to be sassy to be strong. That is not who Sally is. Sally is described in the book as someone who Percy has never heard say a mean word to anyone, and while she is motherly, it again diminishes the sacrifice she made to be with Gabe and just feels unrecognizable as a character. I thought the acting was fine, but maybe it's different coming as someone who knows the book intimately. It just feels like Percy encouraging Sally to finally stand up for herself and choose the path best for her for once is less impactful if she's already been standing up for herself against Gabe's character for years, especially while Percy has been away...

PERCY HIMSELF — Don't get me wrong, Walker Scobell is a GREAT choice for Percy. The Kraft Mac'n'Cheese commercial alone is proof of that. But where is that naturally sassy performance in these first two episodes? The only thing hinting at a sarcastic Percy is the throwaway cafeteria joke ("hey kids, wanna talk about the monsters in my head...?"), but this Percy (so far) lacks impertinence. There are so many opportunities in first few chapters alone that TV!Percy could've incorporated— ditching Grover at the bus station, talking back to Gabe ("kick you in your soft spot, make you sing soprano for a week"), talking back to Mr. D, talking back to Clarisse after the bathroom explodes, etc. While Walker has definitely leaned into the confused Percy character, which is very real, I feel like one of the most important aspects of Percy is his sarcasm and pessimistic humor, which is weirdly absent. He gets kicked out of Yancy originally not for pushing Nancy into the pool, but because his failing grades, bickering with teachers, and general misplaced anger. This is important!! This parallels what happened to Luke after he comes back from his quest, it foreshadows why Percy alone can see Luke for who he is (not solely evil or solely misguided), and it is why Luke tries to convert him to the army initially, because they are foils.

MR. D — The Gods have to feel untouchable because that is one of the recurring themes and sources of resentment for Kronos's army throughout the books. Despite Mr. D's proximity to the campers, book!Percy has to toe the line of respect with him because of his sheer power. Mr. D being played as humorous rather than repugnant diminishes this effect, because it's not yet clear to the viewers why Percy has to respect him, or why Percy would want to disrespect him. Jason's characterization feels a bit more awkward, less developed than it could be with his acting chops, and like a regular counselor making an inappropriately-timed joke rather than an asshole the campers must begrudgingly respect. He even treats Grover and Percy much more kindly than the book one ever would, so I'm curious to see how this will play when Tantalus comes into the picture in season two.

This is just some initial thoughts! I thought Annabeth, Clarisse, and Luke were pretty great, and I like the introduction of Chris Rodriguez earlier on in the story, it sets up his importance pretty well. I wish we had gotten to see Percy flourish more in Cabin Eleven so that his loneliness in Cabin 3 is more poignant; same goes for the gaslighting period at Yancy which could've been emphasized more since it really fucked with him. I think the film location for Camp Half-Blood is gorgeous and I'm so excited to see the new locations the group goes to.

[zoorah]

why do u treat us like this?

i watched the Lee Morgan documentary (one of the greatest trumpeters/musicians ever) on netflix and i’m rly thinking about how Lemonade is such an important album, and how it literally represents the black woman experience and has given a voice to black women.

~

the story of Lee goes.... Helen Morgan (Lee’s wife) helped get him clean and off heroin, provided a home, fed him, clothed him, gave him hope & love. they got married and were happy for many years. She was much older than him so the dynamic was kinda her almost babying him (feeding him, ironing his clothes, getting him gigs again, doing the mostest for him cuz she loved him). basically, the nigga dont know how to take care of himself. 

and then of course, he cheats on her and has an affair with a woman his age. and she also attempts suicide but lives! she threatens to leave but Lee begs her to stay and she does. but this nigga STILL CHEATS ON HER!!!!

so one night she goes to Slug’s, a famous bar where he’s performing to see him. and oh my goddDDDDD, she sees the side bitch with him. the side bitch says, “I thought you wasn’t supposed to be with her anymore”. This motherfucker had the gall to say, “I’m not with this bitch, I’m just telling her to leave me alone”. 

long story longer, Helen hits Lee. Lee kicks her out of the club, without her coat into a literal BLIZZARD to freeze to death (cuz this is new york). Her gun falls out of the bag and she finally snaps. She goes in and shoots him at close range. He dies. 

anyway... after hearing the story, the lyrics of Beyonce’s, Dont Hurt Yourself kept repeating in my head again and again: this is your final warning. you know i give you life. if you try this shit again, you gon’ lose your wife.

Helen Morgan literally nursed Lee back to life (SHE GAVE HIM LIFE AND A REASON TO LIVE) and THIS is how he shows his appreciation??????????? Black women have given so much to black men for decades & centuries and what do we get in return?!??!? WHAT DO WE GET?!?!??!?!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! 

anyway, i’m done.

side note: i dont support Helen Morgan. she’s the older woman. she should have known the relationship was unbalanced. she treated him like a child. and really... what can you expect from a dope fiend? the 10+ years she had on him was more than enough for her to see that the relationship was not going to work. 

she also should have thought twice about killing a musical icon, who if he would have lived longer, would have done even more to contribute to black music, history & culture. 

side side note: if someone cheats on you and/or treats you like shit, do not kill or harm them please. know your worth and just leave. no man in the world is worth devoting your life to.

[cumbersome-apparatus]

(Also, it kind of just makes me think of Tom Lerher and National Brotherhood Week.)

Last week, my SO ran into the room with an extremely concerned look on his face, because I shouted/wheezed “OH MY GODDDDDDD” and then proceeded to roll around on the bed laughing until I cried.

I’m sure, like him, you are wondering what the fuck happened.

I found out about “Hate Week,” is what happened.

Well, kind of. I did a little digging, and I apparently actually did read up to the part where this was mentioned, but I didn’t remember it. I remember very little of the very little I read of 1984. Because as soon as I hit the concept of “this gaudy belt broadcasts how you feel about fuckin’,” my brain shorted out. I couldn’t go on anymore. I politely stuck an expendable (translation: “nothing with planets or dragons on it, probably”) bookmark that I knew would never be retrieved between the pages, closed the book, and set it down forever, because WOW WHEE. That is DUMB.

I was around the same 14-15 age I was when I first read The Handmaid’s Tale, and I’d like to point out that I actually finished that one, even though I hated every single page. I don’t know if that says 1984 was even worse, or just that a) as I’ve mentioned before, I REALLY REALLY WANTED TO READ ABOUT THOSE RADIOACTIVE TRASH HEAPS WHERE YOU WORK UNTIL YOUR NOSE FALLS OFF, and b) I generally read any text placed in front of me until there’s no more left to read, even if I hate it, except for the times I can count on one hand where I found an idea so stupid that my frontal lobe shut off.

...Younger me had high hopes for herself. She was gonna be SMART, and smart people care about POLITICS and can discuss books like THAT. Is this true? I dunno. All I know is that I turned out to not be very smart, and am mostly just relieved that I don’t feel like I have to subject myself to these things anymore. Brains ain’t happening. Politics ain’t happening. I grew up to be an offputting knucklehead who reads Chuck Palahniuk, draws a lot of shitty cartoon gore, and only knows the bare minimum about current events because her partner leaves MSNBC on in the background sometimes, and a few scraps or speech somehow manage to drift through even the most godawful auditory processing, if the TV is on long enough. I think 15 year old me’s thoughts on this would be something like “OH THANK GOD.”

ANYWAY! The point is, “Hate Week” is even dumber than “big red sex belt.” It might even be dumber than “and her name is Of[OMG, it’s a MAN name, see what I did!?],” but that’s a stretch. I’m surprised I didn’t even notice it back then.

Anyway, when I regained my breathing ability, I explained what happened, and he was just like “well, it probably sounded less dumb at the time, and besides didn’t get famous for story, it got famous for the depiction of government. (My SO is a smart person who understands politics, and he did manage to read that whole book, on his own volition and everything, and somewhat enjoy it no less, but I don’t know if they’re related.) And I was just like “if the story isn’t great, why the hell would you want to read it?” He didn’t really have an answer. I don’t think there is one.

But this did make me realize why I hate the “Didactic Dystopia that isn’t factored as genre fiction somehow” genre so much, besides a general aversion to anything that even smells like preachiness. It’s that, even if I’m not sure why people keep reading them, I know why people write them, and it’s for the lesson. And I knew this before! But I don’t think I ever figured in how much it actually affects the worldbuilding. Like... If you’re just trying to make something work as an allegory, as opposed to taking a good long time to think about how the setting would actually work, you’re free to a) put any old dumb thing in there, as long as it parallels something you hate about the gubment or whatever, and b) portray any fucking thing you think is terrible or great as terrible or great without caveats. “Form follows function” is great for tools and household items, but terrible for narratives.

(Like... Part of why I’m writing “Solarpunk” as “passive-aggressive ‘fuck Mars, we got FARMS!’ Art Nouveau Hell where your every move in life is unofficially regulated by the soft authoritarianism of social mores, unless religion is involved, in which case we ‘Respect Your Beliefs,’ to the point of letting sects progress into outright death cults, so long as they’re polite in public” is that I like being contrary, but also? This is what I think it would actually be like to live in a Solarpunk setting as people describe them. It’s the “I like cool buildings and utopias, so this world with cool buildings is utopian because I say it is!” factor that makes standard Solarpunk strike me as kinda dippy, and, honestly, creepy as hell under the surface. Like, I didn’t add in the goddamn Situs Inversus Mormon Vorta War Boy Youth Group to say “see, Solarpunk is bad!” The Situs Inversus Mormon Vorta War Boy Youth Group was hidden in the source code all along. I just took the time to find them, instead of sitting in a circle full of people repeating “aquaponics will save us, lookit this tower!” at each other all day.)

So, yeah, this is a book I doubt I’ll ever restart and finish (unless I eventually want to do something really dumb to myself, like start a “liveblog all the big-name Totally Not Sci-Fi Dystopian Political Tract Novels” project), but I guess I’ll say something nice about it anyway? Okay! “This engineered linguistic shift, allegedly for convenience, is actually an attempt to intentionally alter how people think and see the world” is actually a pretty fucking great story element and Big Plot Reveal. I just think I’d prefer it packaged in a book where the Themes(tm) were more along the lines of “existentially uneasy mediation on the nature of language, the nature of consciousness, and the instability of the sign-referent relationship,” as opposed to “...And this is how you Gubment Bad! I suggest we Gubment Good, or it’ll happen to YOUUUUUU!”

I dunno. Like I said, I don’t really think in politics, so maybe trying to find the point in these books is like trying to appreciate a painting that includes four primary pigments. A lot of it just looks like grey mush and makes my eyes squint and my brain hurt.