#why is he like 53... he's supposed to be like 20 at most

[starsapphire]

WHY IS KRISTOFF SO OLD... WHO IS THIS MAN

[sirenthatmakesyouwantcake]

these are my thoughts on interview with the vampire episode 5 season 2

I've heard a few things about this episode, I've been really wanting to watch it just havent had had the time yet. I've also heard that they don't actually unpack any of it.which seems pretty on brand for them

(6:10) Sometimes, ii think i have bad handwriting, but then there’s daniel’s, which makes my feel a lot better about my own

(7:52) definitely gay (8:11) definitely

This whole interview is just a who can be the sassiest and most insane old gay guy possible

(9:46) daniel is like that one fall out boy song, he spent an entire decade high and doesn't remember any of it (or that he is gay)

(10:04) i like how they had him standing at the window, it's a nice touch

(12:53) if i just found out that vampires are real, i think i would be pretty fucking afraide too

I've been painting my nails while watching and ended up skipping on of my nails

(13:35) that was perfect, it was so close to quoting the book, it was good enough that i even recognised it before i even looked up the first few pages

(16:03) I like this louis more than the other few, he’s so much more fun and happy instead of seeming like he only sort of wanted to be there.

(17:18) it's no wonder he doesn't remember the first interview, he looks like he could barely stand if he wanted to

(22:55) 70’s armand is millennial grey

(24:21) i think someone is a little jealous (another weirdly spelled word) ((25:19) and the other one is schizophrenia), i also think two someones need to go the marriage therapy

(26:16) well that took quite a turn, and i think its shows their relationship well, how even thought why both had just yelled at each other, armand still saved him right away, and then, though i haven't gotten there yet, i assume that armand made him forget how bad it hurt, (38:22), i take parts of that back, armand basically torched him, they really do need therapy, i'm surprised they didn't end up killing each other in the time between the interviews

(29:23) poor daniel got caught in the middle of their messed up relationship

(30:01) for some reason, i thought the guy in the bag was daniel, and somehow he was revived and turned into a vampire, i clearly didn't think this through much because now that i'm thinking about it again, there in no way that would have worked

Armand is supposed to look 17, he looks 20 or so, i know his actor is somewhere in his 20’s and he did play him well, i don't think they could have done the show the same way if he was played by a younger actor.

(38:22) about time

(45:31) louis is quite a jump scare when the rest of your room is dark and quite

(51:01) once again, not talking about the problems

OTHER

I really like how both daniel’s had similar voices, specifically the gravely (i think that's the right word) parts

Conclusion of this episode: maybe all four of them could use some therapy or atleast to talk to each other and work out their problems (the last part doesn't really apply to lestat, he was not part of the sort of ok guys, not good guys, i don't think any of them really qualify as good guys except daniel, he was just caught up in everything)

This episode really put their relationship through it but i think it may have helped parts of it as well, maybe if armand and louis could actually talk they could have a better relationship that isn't just hanging off a cliff

@certainunkownlove2 was telling me about this post and i think all of you need to read it, he is so wonderful for this

Thank you for reading, now it is time for me to rest (literally speaking, it's late and i'm tired)

other episodes

S2E1 S2E2 S2E3 S2E4 S2E6

[royallygray]

Scar HC S10E12

actually welcome to Scar Says Sus Stuff

this was supposed to be me talking about my favorite parts or parts I want to share but it's just the sus parts and several things that I specifically liked

like. a rly in depth AO3 comment except with a YouTube video.

spoilers for his video

(I haven't watched most of scar's episodes so far)

-- --

1:01 "grant me access to the hole" scar. scar please. your wording. fix it. but also never change we love you but oh my god SCAR

it is actually triggering me that he's just casually on three hearts. my man PLEASE EAT

3:53 "I'm gonna wait for [Grian] inside of his mouth"

5:38 "well now Skizz and my bits are all mixed together"

6:06 "I fall for it EVERY time, by the way" -Skizz. I love Scar and Skizz, the two gullible-est people bonding over how they're gullible. It's genuinely somehow wholesome.

6:20 "something of substance was gonna come from this"

6:44 SKIZZ COME ON MAN I HAD FAITH IN YOU WHAT THE HECK

6:51 There was PASSION in this. Scar go off on them YEAH

7:33 how did I know he was gonna be one block off. rip scar you tried o7

7:40 "he didn't get inside my hole at all" SCAR.

8:17 "we could get six horns" the word horns sounds like hoards. and also kind of the other word.

8:39 (for one frame) the inside of scars face is cursed

10:17 THAT WAS SMOOTH THAT WAS SO SMOOTH IM OBSESSED??? SCAR YOURE A MAGICIAN. A WIZARD. THAT SNAP. IM OBSESSED.

but also. scar. why do you have a tnt minecart as decoration. scar I don't have high hopes for this room. scar you come from the Life series. scar. it's gonna die. someone's gonna shoot it with a flame bow I guarantee it

10:46 LMAO the way he tried to say cartographer sounds so. like. idk endearing or smth idk. Like he tried to breathe in and talk at the same time.

11:05 "I've just realized I kind of look like a composter" that is the entire clip by the way. all you out of context makers, I need that in there. idk if it'll be as funny as it is in here, because seriously, the delivery of having literally no other context other than it just being a random thought that popped into Scar's head is so funny to me

11:41 scar at the goat horn shop what will he do. I'm not mad scar. I think you're an adult who is making decisions with their fictional money. and you deserve it. you deserve that goat horn.

11:52 I lied put it back

12:44 WAIT YOURE GONNA PUT TURTLES AND DOLPHINS IN HERE THATS SICK I LOVE IT

in seventh grade we did an essay on whether zoos are good or bad and while I do love scars character in this I literally cannot stop thinking about it :(

13:15 SCAR THAT WAS TOO SMOOTH I--OH MY GOD OH MY GOD OH MY GOD THATS SUCH A COOL TRANSITION AND ALSO THE SOUND EFFECT OH MY GODSSSSS

ALSO YOU SWIRLED TO SUCH A COOL NEW THING WHAT THE HECK WOW LIKE OKAY

wait oh my god it's a sink?? the water and lava?? oh my god??

14:55 damn Gem and Grian's spike has grown

15:35 scar I don't think you remember where your stuff is in the first place. at least like this it'll look cool. although the underground weird chest monster has character and I actually kinda like it in the same way that I like when my floor is a mess because it just feels inhabited and has personality

15:58 oh my god scar you transition god

16:33 scar why are you there

16:35 Etho I appreciate you LMAO

17:19 Etho have you seen Skizz's storage. it's. bad. like. it is worse than Scar's. Genuinely. It gives me pain.

17:25 THE PEARL DOORS. THE BOATEM PEARL DOORRSSSS also scar going through the middle even tho Etho literally opened the other door for him LMAO

17:32 ah yes dig when there is an entrance yes yes

17:43 honey roofs. I see you're obsessed with Joel's gift mr. slab.

this scene is actually amazing. I've never seen Etho and scar interact 1 on 1 (I don't watch a lot of Scar, and I have watched Etho a total of approximately once. his videos are rly long) and also just. Etho's system is so cool.

also Etho's storage system is adorable :D

I like both storage systems. Etho's is significantly more functional (and less likely to explode, scar that minecart is making me wary) but I really enjoy the aesthetic of Scar's.

thank you for coming to Royal says stuff, go watch scar's video, it's great.

[queeenpersephone]

20 questions for 20 writers

tagged by @katebishopofearth ilysm lizzy <3

1. How many works do you have on AO3? 53

2. What’s your total AO3 word count? 455,252 (almost half a mil)

3. What fandoms do you write for? so many. predominately, marvel, the x files, shadow and bone, the librarians, the umbrella academy, game of thrones (a few years ago). but i have a few i've only written one or two fics for.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? like one of yours, ye multitudinous ocean (pjo) (2283 kudos) - delicate (marvel) (2005 kudos) - are you there, chloe? it's me, god (lucifer) (1428 kudos) - it will be a heaven of black-red roses (marvel) (1208 kudos) - a ring around the moon (s&b) (1170 kudos). the crazy thing? the top one i posted this year.

5. Do you respond to comments? ALWAYS. nearly every one, even if it's just 'this was great'. i only don't reply if it's just emojis (which are still appreciated! i just don't know what to say lol) or if it's like a rude demand for sequels or to update. i don't mind asking for a sequel, but just be nice about it.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? ooo that's hard. objectively though, it has to be the whole thing would fracture which is a strange daisy x coulson fic (agents of shield) where daisy, inspired by watching doctor who with fitzsimmons, causes the apocalypse when coulson is killed.

7. What’s the fic you wrote with the happiest ending? that's a really hard question! new years day in terms of payoff (ironwidow) and now when weather turns to may (all my sisters fly to me) (doctor who, companions traveling together without the doctor) in terms of canon divergence lol. it's the epitome of everyone lives, nobody dies.

8. Do you get hate on fics? not very frequently! i think i'm in good fandoms (or good parts of fandoms at least) it's shocking considering that i ship some pretty touchy ships. i think i've gotten the most on ironwidow fics tbh. i always delete it without responding so i think that's why i get so little - zero interaction policy.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? oh yeah, although i held out for a long time. what kind? like mildly explicit? it's usually in a darker context, i suppose.

10. Do you write crossovers? i have! and forth he hastened (and grasped at moonbeams glistening), which is a lotr/game of thrones crossover. it was for a friend - i don't typically like crossovers, but it was fun!

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? yep - i've had some very kind people reach out to inform me, and i've always been successful in taking them down.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? yes! it's a huge compliment.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? yes! one. it's since been removed as my friend took down all of her work due to receiving hate

14. What’s your all-time favorite ship? this is pretty much an impossible question. if you put a gun to my head, i would still say it's a tie between the doctor and rose and natasha and tony. the doctor and rose changed my brain chemistry, and ironwidow basically taught me how to write.

15. What’s a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? ooo i have this game of thrones soulmate!au where sansa's soulmates (one romantic, three platonic) are varys, jon, petyr, and daenerys. i have the whole timeline, and i posted three parts of it in a series. i genuinely love the concept so much and i've written a lot for it, but my love of the show took a huge hit in s8 and i don't plan on writing more of it.

16. What are your writing strengths? i think i'm pretty talented at dialogue. i've written poetry my whole life, so poetic descriptions are kinda my thing.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? there's so many things to improve on! general descriptiveness, getting better at showing emotions instead of telling them. writing longer stories is definitely difficult for me.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? i've done it, but infrequently. i don't even like indicators of accent (ie, strollin' instead of strolling) i think it can be offensive very easily. except endearments! love endearments in other languages, but i usually do some research to make sure i'm accurate.

19. First fandom you wrote for? i THINK harry potter? or pirates of the caribbean. fanfiction.net is down so i can't check. no i will not be telling y'all my fanfic.net handle it's better this way.

20. Favorite fic you’ve written? hi this is an impossible question. holistically, it's probably like one of yours, ye multitudinous ocean, a pjo fic that was ripped from my soul either this year. i believe it's one of the best things i've ever written, and has also gotten the best response of any fic i've written. in terms of plot, easily new year's day, which is a marvel rewrite with ironwidow as the focus. the yellow roses of texas (fiveya) is the most symbolic, layered, complex fic i've ever written and i love it to death. honestly, and it's gimmicky to say, i wrote a fic for the sorcerer's apprentice when i was 13 (with a mary sue OC and everything) that had a great response on fanfic.net and it made me want to do this for the rest of my life. so yeah. maybe that one.

yay i loved this! thank you again lizzy for tagging me.

Tagging: @rappaccini, @baronessblixen, @hedgehodgy, @gingerteaonthetardis, @imissthembutitwasntadisaster,

@impulsive-astrophile, @scullysflannel @repeatinglitanies, @scullysexual @thatfragilecapricorn30

pretty sure all these folks write/have in the past! feel free to ignore <3

[wonderlandleighleigh]

96 Thoughts while rewatching the Marvelous Mrs. Maisel Pilot.

1. Midge graduated college early, got married and had her first kid in like a year and a half holy shit girl.

2. That fat joke not great. But ASP is ASP.

3. monogrammed butter pads. Like Disney World!

4. lol the bleaching.

5. Why did the man have to be Joel?

6. Midge why was Joel a gift from god? He was not. He was not a gift from god, the best thing he did for you was help you recognize Lenny when you eventually got thrown in the same cop cruiser.

7. The airplane gluuuueeeeee lol

8. The suit they put Luke in is too big on purpose, to try and make him look older and less attractive and it uh...doesn’t work.

9. Against a tree. Ugh. Not comfortable.

10. “we’re very happy” I love Abe so much.

11. So many angry Jews about shrimp.

12. YOU SHOW ME WHERE IN THE BIBLE WHERE GOD SAYS YOU CAN’T EAT SHRIMP.

13. I wish I lived where there was a dedicated butcher.

14. Poor Midge has no idea that she and Joel are skint because he hasn’t told her shit. God dammit.

15. Spending hours on that brisket. Hours to get it perfect.

16. He hates you, Joel, because you’re a terrible comedian and you don’t deserve a better time.

17. “I don’t know what I’d do without you.” You’re gonna find out, asshole.

18. Penny Pann cannot use an electric pencil sharpener. She is so fucking dumb. How did she figure out sex if she couldn’t figure out- you know never mind.

19. The music slaps.

20. Remember that no matter how in love Joel is acting in this moment, he’s been fucking Penny for months.

21. MONTHS.

22. He winds up so angry about Midge handling everything for him, but he let her. He enjoyed it. He barely had to lift a finger.

23. Oh Susie.

24. Oh Midge.

25. I owe my soul to the company stooooooore

26. “I should be kissing the brisket!” Fuck you.

27. Jackieeeeeeeeeeeee

28. Blugh.

29. Blugh Joel.

30. Susie knows what’s up.

31. “I was great.” Holy fuck.

32. One standing ovation everyone goes home pregnant. lol

33. We’ve never met Aunt Bertha. I want to. I deserve Aunt Bertha.

34. Fuck, Midge’s routine is so brutal. Paranoidly staying awake until Joel drops off, and then doing her entire routine and sneaking back into bed. Getting up before the sun is up to redo her whole look and then pretending to be asleep. Jesus, not thank you.

35. COMPLETE WITH FAKE EYELASHES UGH.

36. She really thought this was supposed to be her life forever. That this was it.

37. Morning Ethan. Ethan. Ethan. Ethan. E-

38. Rose and the forehead. Ugh. Just the - the physical expectations...so much yikes.

39. lol schnorror

40. Oh Imogene.

41. Again. The every day physical demands are insane. And Midge puts this on herself for the most part, but I do get the feeling that Joel...didn’t help.

42. “I made curry but I also ordered Chinese.” BITCH NO! NO! YOU MAKE DINNER HE EATS WHAT YOU COOKED WHETHER HE LIKES IT OR NOT AND IF IT IS TRULY UNPALATABLE YOU ORDER OUT TOGETHER. God damn, the shit this woman would go through just to make this horrible man happy. Fuck’s sake.

43. Poor Midge, realizing that Joel is stealing material. Thinking at first that someone stole his stuff.

44. THERE IS AN ENTIRE ENORMOUS BOWL OF LEMONS ON THE TABLE! Are they wax? Jesus that’s so many.

45. “It’s fine, everybody does it.” Feh.

46. “When I found out June Friedman stole my meatloaf recipe I almost stabbed her in the eye with a fork.” Big Lorelai vibes.

47. “You’ll learn.” Fuck you, Joel.

48. Midge made another brisket when Baz asked for latkes....

49. Midge is never on time. Just FYI.

50. Joel not getting his way gets shitty. We start to see how terrible he is here. The cracks of her being berated for things she can’t control. Like ted the moth.

51. He’s not a comedian, Midge.

52. LOL Susie. “THE CLEARYS ARE HERE?!”

53. The jerkoff motion lol. Love it.

54. Who here likes Hillbilly polka?! Me! I do!

55. SPOKANE!

56. Watching Joel bomb is rough. I absolutely hate this scene. If there’s one thing this show does well, it’s showing people bomb. And how bad it can be. It really is like chewing tin foil. Like nails on a chalkboard.

57. No one cares about your holey sweater, asshole. You cannot tell a joke.

58. It is so hard to watch. It is so hard to watch. Holy shit. Holy shit just stop stop Joel stop no no no no no no no no no.

59. And of course he blames Midge for his bad performance. Everything is her fault. He cannot take responsibility for his lack of talent. It has to be her fault.

60. And she’s trying to be supportive. She’s trying to be kind about this. And he’s just...awful.

61. Like i get that this was a bad night for him, but his lack of ability to deal with his life is atrocious.

62. And he’s leaving her because suddenly this isn’t what he wants, even though he’s been relying on her for their whole marriage. He loves it when things go right. He cannot deal when things don’t go his way.

63. “Nobody’s happy, it’s Yom Kippur.”

64. “he was in Buchenwald, throw him a bone!” lol I love this line. It’s a particular bit of very Jewish gallows humor that’s hard to come by in pop culture, and it’s what sold me on the show when I watched it for the first time.

65. She had no idea this was actually his dream. He never told her. They never talked about his dreams, or her wants. They don’t talk to each other.

66. BECAUSE YOU KILLED IT. It’s true.

67. “Do you know what a dream is?” What a terrible - god dammit.

68. YOU NEVER TALK TO HER ABOUT YOUR FEELINGS YOU PIECE OF SHIT! YOU NEVER TALK AND SO SHE HAS NO IDEA! You fucking asshole. God damn. 

69. You cannot expect your partner to know everything without telling them. That’s just moving the goal posts around day after day. Jesus.

70. “I will be better. I will do better.” Poor Midge. god dammit.

71. He is so awful. I cannot believe I sit through scenes of this terrible man. He is the fucking worst. And he has been from fucking jump, and he’s only gotten marginally better.

72. “SO YOU”LL TELL YOUR PARENTS FOR ME?!” WHAT THE FUCK!

73. Joel Maisel is the WoooOOOOooOOOOOOooorst!

74. “I’m sorry.” You’re not sorry at all.

75. Though I think that was the only time he ever really said it.

76. I love how much Abe loves television.

77. “What did you do?” Ugh. Ugh.

78. “That was about deli, too.” lol

79. omg Rose. Her character development is amazing.

80. “You cannot survive this.” Yeah she can.

81. Girl I’d get drunk too.

82. favorite gif:

83. It’s a Pyrex. My Pyrex.

84. Joel did not want to be challenged. He wanted to be coddled.

85. Midge her shirt was on inside out because she put it back on after fucking your husband girl.

86. THEM TITTIES

87. LENNYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY.

88. For how much of an unforgiving hardass Susie can be, she also is very sympathetic to Midge when she’s falling apart

89. One standing ovation, everyone goes home pregnant.

90. lol eating chips on Yom Kippur mood.

91. 10 in the morning?!

92. You’re not my wife.

93. Their chemistry from jump was just amazing. He was only supposed to be a bit part and...yeah. They just...the way they look at each other, even from the beginning.

94. And she just waits patiently for him to finish his schtick. She knows he’s just gotta work through his little song and dance to get to her answer. They have a rhythm from the beginning.

95. THE FUCK BOY SHRUG.

96. Yeah. He loves it.

[hondacivictrucknuts]

Freddie deBoer:

I’m interested in a different issue: why does Swift harbor such a palpable feeling that she needs even more success? 15 years after “You Belong With Me” was released, she’s grinding more than ever, clawing for more and more presence in the national popular consciousness. Her vast professional apparatus has worked relentlessly to make sure that she stays in said popular consciousness. And my question is… why? For what? What does she want, that she does not already have? What need could she fill that hasn’t already been filled? She has more of everything than almost any human being who has ever lived. Why does she need more than more?

It does rather clarify some things that deBoer can't understand an artist giving her fans more of what they want. I guess it's better to follow Rimbaud, and quit writing at 20!

However much "more" Taylor Swift is accumulating from the Eras tour and the concert film and everything else, she is reaping only a small portion of what she's making. Most of it accrues to the rest of us! As Peggy Noonan notes:

Bloomberg Economics reports U.S. gross domestic product went up an estimated $4.3 billion as a result of her first 53 concerts. The tour made her a billionaire, according to Forbes the first musician ever to make that rank solely based on her songs and performances.

...ergo she's pocketing less than a quarter of the economic activity she's creating.

Why does Freddie keep writing? For the money? He really can't get any other job? I suppose like many socialists he has a lifestyle that requires him to live in a high-COL city. If he had Taylor's money, he'd just quit working and go have a relationship in private.

[wilderavyn]

Watch Laws of Attraction Ep 3 with me.

Spoilers Ahead!

4:25 Well no wonder he's an absolute asshole now.

5:10 Another body? Did that kid actually murder someone? Like on purpose. Did the kid see it or did they really just get hit on accident.

6:53 Well no we know which doll is so important but why?

8:22 I like her.

9:00 She can already tell you have a crush Charn.

9:14 You're most definitely going to lose to Tinn.

10:55 This fool rent an icecream truck just to ask the kids a question about a doll? This man is too much.

11:52 Good job kid! lol

12:29 If he talked to grandma about the dolls why hasn't she said anything about the doll she gave Ploy?

14:02 So just small versions of you then? As in you clearly never grew up dude.

14:36 Totally has a crush on him.

17:27 Omg a man that actually says it wasn't her fault for being harassed no matter her background. This is progress happening on a show.

18:45 Already showing support to him. I like it.

20:13 Well played Charn.

21:22 You think an apology is going to work on this petty man? He wants to humiliate you.

21:31 Solve problems with violence. He probably has killed someone then, or has had someone else do it for him. And you the father taught him this obviously you bastard.

22:37 "Did you know that people who can only threaten other do that because they themselves live in fear?" What a chilling quote.

22:36 Friends? With this petty bastard? Not a chance. He's going to roast you alive. and I say that with all the affection in the world.

24:34 Damn charn is a shark.

25:15 Damn. I wish he wanted his son to turn himself in because it's the right thing to do and not just because he sees his son as an inconvenience to him.

26:15 I have such mixed feelings for this kid. He's clearly bad news and deserves to be punished but also he's a victim in this horrible house he was raised in.

30:05 A dog? Really? Damn this show is harsh. How is my heart supposed to handle this?

31:20 How cute. Charn is concerned about you and maybe realizing his actions have consequences...for other people? This feels like progress.

32:47 Oh look at him going soft on Charn

33:40 And there goes all my sympathy for the kid right down the drain.

34:04 There's definitely tension between the kid and the bodyguard right? I'm not imagining that? I just haven't wanted to admit it because I don't know the age difference, and the kid is still a minor right? Please tell the bodyguard is within a reasonable age of him.

34:52 Grandma is not stupid.

36:10 WTF! This is too much.

37:58 WTF is going on. Why are you there? That's super suspicious.

39.20 Well doesn't he look pleased with himself.

41:37 Actually nervous for the kid right now.

43:01 Ok this is definitely too much. I feel like I'm saying that a lot with this show.

45:09 He totally suspects Charn doesn't he?

49:21 Damn. I knew he played dirty but damn.

49:50 Oh Charn looks deeply hurt that Tin doesn't think he actually cares and only wants revenge.

Yet another disturbing episode! Why am I still watching when I know how fragile my heart is?

[inglourious-imagines]

PROMPT LIST

Hello people! This is my own prompt list! Feel free to send requests! I’m really excited to do this haha

Also, this really took me some time to put it all together so please, if you reblog/use it/etc. give me credit. Thanks!

Update: If you have your own prompt that is not listed, quote or whatever else and you think it’s great, you can send it to me and we’ll see what comes out of it.

1. I fucking hate everyone. But you, you’re the only person I don’t hate.

2. And he looked at me, like there was something in me worth looking at. 

3. Anger makes you stupid. Stupid gets you killed.

4. I’m here. You can talk to me or not talk to me but I’m here.

5. Goddamn right you should be scared of me! 

6. And suddenly, life wasn’t about living. It was about surviving.

7. "-but you’ll die!“ "I don’t care." 

8. I said I’m fucking fine.

9. Don’t you touch her.

10. We sat there smoking cigarettes at 5 in the morning. 

11. Oh! The girl/boy I’ve heard so much about. 

12. No one would hurt you again, or I’d kill them.

13. A cigarette for a thousand problems.

14. I could keep you save. They’re all afraid of me.

15. You look so proud standing there with a frown and a cigarette. 

16. Thank you for loving me when I still tasted of heartache and war.

17. His eyes had more darkness than any other eyes I had ever seen before.

18. You don’t know shit about what happened to me. 

19. This is who we are, a product of war.

20. Looking half a corpse and half a god.

21. I wanna see how you lose control.

22. I look at you and I just love you and it terrifies me. It terrifies me what I would do for you. 

23. "You can’t protect everyone.” “I have to try." 

24. He’s a badass with a good heart.

25. You are losing my interest, and that is very dangerous. 

26. In a fight, they’re lethal. Around each other, they melt. 

27. I wonder which will get you killed faster, your loyalty or your stubbornness.

28. You collect scars because you want proof that you are paying for whatever sins you’ve comitted. 

29. With this smile, I can get away with everything. 

30. I was so stupid to make the mistake of falling in love with my best friend. 

31. Come over here and make me.

32. Oh my god! You’re in love with him!

33. Oh, do you ever shut up? 

34. Can you two please get a room? 

35. I have a name and it’s not sweetheart. 

36. If I ever see you anywhere near her, you’ll have to deal with me. 

37. Everyone keeps telling me you’re the bad guy. 

38. Such dirty words from such a pretty little mouth. 

39. Kiss me. 

40. Are you flirting or starting a fight? 

41. You stay awake do you hear me?! Don’t you dare close your eyes! Please! Come on! 

42. Honestly, I only asked you for help because it’s so cute when you try.  

43. You’re standing a little close to me..

44. You’re evil. It’s hot. 

45. If you bite your lip one more time, I swear I’m going to do it for you. 

46. By the Gods! You love her, don’t you? 

47. It’s blood, not nuclear waste. Chill out. 

48. A knife? Are you flirting with me? 

49. "Hear me out.” “Why the fuck should i listen to you?" 

50. I’ve been wanting to kick your ass all week. 

51. Rumour has it, I make you nervous. 

52. Leave, leave right now.

53. Can you just fuck off already?

54. "I- I trusted you!” “Sweet naive girl, trust is for children. You are a soldier." 

55. Alcohol’s the only instant in my life.

56. You gotta stop saying things that make me want to kiss you. 

57. Please don’t do this. Don’t act like you care. 

58. Is everything supposed to go dark?

59. Why can’t you see what you’re doing to me. 

60. Fuck, you’re the most beautiful person I’ve ever seen in my whole life.

61. It’s 2 in the morning. Why are you still up?

62. I want an answer, goddammit! 

63. You make me want things I can’t have. 

64. Cut the crap and tell me what happened. 

65. Hear my heartbeat? Just focus on that.

66. It’s nice to see someone who can appreciate my humour.

67. We’re more than just friends and you know it. 

68. It’s pitch black in here and I can see you’re blushing.

69. Yes asshole, I do care about you.

70. They’re both stubborn and it’s complicated. 

71. For you, I would.

72. I like you more than I planned.

73. I need you, idiot.

74. Golden eyes and a smile made for war.

75. Take that, fuckers!

76. I licked it so it’s mine!

77. We’re in this together. 

78. Can I have this dance? 

79. Look, I know you’re a hardass but can you play with my hair? It would really help. 

80. No! Stay away from me! Stay back! 

81. Maybe if you actually stop staring at her and talk to her, you might have a chance. 

82. You have to promise you won’t fall in love with me.

83. I know that face. That’s your I’m-upset-with-you face. 

84. I think we’d make this a fair fight if we each had a gun. Don’t you think, boys? 

85. He loves you, you know? He’s just afraid of admitting it.

86. Dear Lord, please have mercy on my soul. This woman/man will be the death of me. 

87. There are other things than Germans that can kill you. 

88. What the hell? You are supposed to hate me!

89. Why do you like me?

90. "You’re annoying.” “You love me.”

91. Wanna go to hell together? 

92. I lack the vocabulary to describe you.

93. You make me feel… you make me feel.“ 

94. What the fuck…?

95. So that’s you, the girl/boy who destroyed armies. 

96. You’re my regret.

97. You better not die on me! 

98. Can you stop shouting at me?!

99. Why are you making this so damn hard? 

100. But that’s the problem, (name). I don’t think I’m able to stop loving him/her. Ever. 

! UPDATE !

101. There is no way you’re going anywhere with him, not on my watch.

102. “You know you’re in love with her right?” “Since when?” “Since always.” 

103. Give me one good reason why I shouldn’t do this.

104. I love you, I do, but you’re a real pain in the ass.

105. Is that my shirt?

106. Neither one of us is drunk enough for this conversation.

107. I think I might be falling in love with you.

108. What are you talking about? You’re married!

109. I saw that. You just checked me out.

110. Quick, pretend you’re talking to me.

111. I just wanted to hear your voice.

112. That was, by far, the stupidest thing you’ve ever done.

113. No. The moment you saw me as a bet was the moment you fucked up.

114. "It could be worse.” “You aren’t the one bleeding.” “Look, you’re still alive. Stop whining.”

115. Are you naked under that thing?

116. “Are you flirting with me?” “You finally noticed?”

117. What the hell were you thinking?! 

18. You’ve been drinking tonight, haven’t you?

119. Well, if I told you, then it wouldn’t be a secret.

120. Is it weird that was a total turn on?

121. That was the worst joke I’ve ever heard.

122. If I kiss you right now, I won’t be able to stop.

123. What did you just say?

[aestheticvoyage2023]

Day 48: Friday February 17, 2023 - “Photo Reel”

What my photo reel can say about how we navigated our day together:

7:08am - Stacking garages at sunrise. I may never sleep in ever again. 10:49am - Story time at the Library, shy in my lap.  Taking in the scene.  William starts school next week, so some good socialization should be useful.  I told William that Libraries are where all the books come from. He obviously had no clue we were coming to Story time for little babies instead of nap today! 11:15am - William is caught reading “Where is the Pirate?” to another little boy with a stuffed rat. Biggest cat in the room once he figured it out. 11:54am - Holy shit, did you know Peacocks can jump?! 12:05pm - When we go to the zoo we work our way back to the Elephants, and apparently Noon is a really great time to be here, because at least today, Noon was feeding time and all the elephants were right up to the gate and what do they eat?  Cucumbers.  Check that out William! 12:15pm - After seeing the elephants, I get William out to run around and see if he’ll go hit the elephant butt.  Today he came close - but did really enjoy watching the other little boys do it.  He can point out every animal on the big donor mural back there! Even the Ostrich! 12:28pm - “Want to go see the bearded dragons today?”  “YEAAAA!” 12:53pm. - Lunch time. Zoo Fries.  Dippa Dippa. Ice.  We both love this part of the day. 2:02pm - Somewhere during the hour long afternoon nap.   Audrie asked me to try to stretch the morning out and only do one nap.  I gave it my best shot!  I kept him awake until 1:30 when we started to drive home.  I pulled into Michaels Parking Lot as soon as he was out and took advantage of that time to get some work done, hotspotting into my email.  Time is a premium.  I look up into the mirror to see if he’s still asleep and saw the most precious little boy with his Uncle Louie and I thought he looked just about perfect. 3:43pm - Time outside laying on the grass playing with the ice cream truck, turned into a big whirling dervish Dog Wrestle where all three puppies practiced their best moves and defenses to see who would be king for the day, and in practiced fashion, Havarti wins.  Because Havyvys is the King of every day here at The Finca.   4:33pm - Toot Toot.  Time to go try to take a nap because this guy is asking for Thomas The Train.... or maybe he’s pretending to be an ice cream train.  Hard to say but I look at this picture now at the end of the day and can literally hear him saying “toot toot” 7:20 - Butter Noodles are served with Potatoes/Ranch Dippa, and Cucumbers (like the elephants eat).  It took some wild coaxing (I know that was a lot of french fries dude but that was literally six hours ago!).  Even Mama couldnt coax him to eat over facetime.  Finally I got serious.  “What do you want to watch while you eat? Dora?”  “HOCKEY!”  Seriously? OK!  I found the Spartans playing Wisconsin, and William clapped and said “Lets Go Blues” and ate his dinner.  Sometimes something works and I have no clue why.  Like what kind of cheat code was that?! 7:45pm - Play time in the great room to wind down and digest that food.  Get your wiggles out running that truck transporter up and down the bench seat.  That truck transporter is early front runner for toy of the year. 7:53 -”What are you playing with there buddy?” - “Mama on the airplane.”  Now thats a heart melter.   “Mama flying the airplane? While the pilot rides?”   “Yea!” “Is that why it never leaves the ground?”   “Yea!” 8:13pm - Tubby time.  He really doesn’t like getting his hair washed.  Really its the rinse that gets him.  He’s taken to playing with the rinse bucket so that I can’t sneak up on him with it.  This kid really loves his nightly tubby time though, especially since we add the blocks to make a boat out of for Ernie and Cookie, and bubbles that smell so nice.  Its a great positive kickoff to bedtime routine and I am so glad he enjoys it and its not a fight.  I suppose we can thank mama and all those early bath times for that!  Writing about it now reminds me of how funny he was when we’d lift him up and out of the bath as a little baby.  Such great memories. 9:14pm: 15 hours after it started, almost exaclty, the day was done. Sure I had to come back in and reassure him the standard few times, but I called it with a photo at 9:14.  The bed time routine went fine.  He didn’t want to get out of the tub, and so got shivery cold as he brushed his teeth and I held him tightly in front of the mirror.  I moved him to the changing table where I combed his hair real nice with a part to the left (my favorite part of the routine), then lotioned him, added a diaper, and put on his lucky “No Wake Zone” pajamas - we might need these tonight after Mama had me take out the morning nap!  Then we read 4 books (Heads, Goodnight Hockey, Love In The Wild, and First 100 Trucks), while he ate a Peach Squeezy yogurt, the only one he’ll take these days.  He sucked it dry in about 2 minutes.  I should time him one of these days, but its very efficient. I suppose all that practice with the nipple raised a superstar squeezy sucker.  We put on the sleep sack, said goodnight to the dogs and everything else we passed along the way (elmo chair, monkey, baseball, hockey game on tv). He took some ibuprofen for his teeth, chased with some icewawa, looked at me and said “Bop” - Kenny Chesney, Nick Mulvey, Renee & Jermey, Sleep Sounds, Thunderstorm.   Bop goes the weasel and finally on the third of fourth try I had him down to stay and I snuck out.  Finally time for a break.  Turned the salt lamp up, stole a pic - the best one of the day.  The trophy prize - a happy healthy sleeping baby right on time at the end of a successful day where I planned my work and I work my plan.  The picture, at 9:14pm, of successful Dad Day.

Song:  Kid Cudi - Pursuit of Happiness

Quote:  “Listen to me son, I’ll tell you why your father is strong; Because he can still say ever single day, he’s yearning to belong. Yearning to belong, Yearning to belong,  My heart beats with a ceaseless longing of a yearning to belong In spite of myself, and all of these nursery songs My heart beats with a ceaseless, meets with a peaceless burning to belong”

~Nick Mulvey, CuCuRuCu   

[heyassbuttlmao]

I posted 4,352 times in 2022

That's 4,352 more posts than 2021!

159 posts created (4%)

4,193 posts reblogged (96%)

Blogs I reblogged the most:

@castielsupernatural

@ginwicche

@obsessionofspn

@altarofrowena

@bitingmp3

I tagged 1,221 of my posts in 2022

#art <3 - 223 posts

#spn - 77 posts

#supernatural - 75 posts

#the boys - 65 posts

#my faves &lt;3 - 57 posts

#the boys spoilers - 39 posts

#destiel - 23 posts

#ow - 23 posts

#dean winchester - 20 posts

#castiel - 16 posts

Longest Tag: 137 characters

#are no different than the characters they portray as mentally ill™️ because no that's different our characters just have daddy issues and

My Top Posts in 2022:

#5

fic masterlist

I only ever post my fics on ao3, because it's where I read fanfic, but I figured I should at least link them here, so viola, have a post about my spn fanfic I've written (I'm not bothering to link all the stucky I write here because I do not think y'all care, but that is on my ao3 too if you want to check it out)

yes all my fic titles are song lyrics shut up

hand me a pen and I'll rewrite the pain - complete, 37k

domestic destiel fluff, but also mostly family angst lmao. instead of bringing just mary back, amara also brings back john, and dean has to grapple with the fact that oh shit he was actually a very shitty father. (also she brings back bobby and charlie because I say so)

i'll take my chances on the curb here with you - oneshot, 1.8k

finale fix-it. aka the finale didn't happen and they get cas back. aka post-confession destiel reunion + first kiss

i've got this sentimental heart that beats - oneshot, 4.5k

outsider pov about one of sam's friends from stanford running into him years later. mostly just fluff and me getting overly invested in this oc by accident

running through the numbers in my phone - oneshot, 700 words

sequel/companion to i've got this sentimental heart that beats. literally just sam's other friends from stanford spamming his phone after getting his number from the oc from the last fic. because I could

show me the rivers crossed, the mountains scaled - oneshot, 2.5k

first spn fic I wrote, was supposed to be a destiel fic but cas isn't even in it whoops. (destiel is still the ship but like,,,, only mentioned ghdgghsd). anyways what this actually ended up being was sam and dean running into each other at a gay bar and awkwardly coming out to each other as bi (I'm not even necessarily a queer sam truther so I have no fucking clue where this fic came from lmao)

33 notes - Posted July 2, 2022

#4

also also ALSO thinking. thinking. cas fucking letting go, pushing dean away from him, in purgatory. making sure dean saves himself but not letting him save him. and dean fucking convincing himself he was the one who let go, not cas, because that was easier. it just makes me wonder what dean told himself after cas pushed him away in 15x18, to make it easier than admitting to himself that cas loved him so much he would die for it

45 notes - Posted August 26, 2022

#3

my suggested posts rn are SO funny and also so valid

See the full post

53 notes - Posted July 5, 2022

#2

ngl but I don't get why so much attention is being placed on whether AI art is "real art" or not instead of??? the fact that it's using stolen art?? like that feels like the actual problem here for me???

71 notes - Posted December 6, 2022

My #1 post of 2022

SOMEONE EXPLAIN TO ME WHAT HAPPENED WHAT DID I MISS IM FUCKING BUSY I CANT INVESTIGATE WHAT HAPPENED WITH DESTIEL RN SOMEONE TELL ME WHAT HAPPENED PLS I AM BEGGING

84 notes - Posted September 5, 2022

Get your Tumblr 2022 Year in Review →

[ignis-sama]

1. Won't say it because it's gendered and I still haven't changed my name officially yet. 🥺

2. 23 but I feel way older.

3. Won't say it because I don't like it.

4. Snake (using Chinese zodiac because why not)

5. Black

6. I don't have one but I like 6.

7. I have a cat.

8. Morioh I mean Europe (but mentally I'm in Morioh)

9. I don't know but I'm not tall.

10. 37-38?

11. I don't count them at all.

12. I don't remember most of my dreams.

13. I don't have any.

14. No idea.

15. I Am A Rock? Or Touch the Sky (Whyzdom)

16. Texas Chainsaw Massacre (though I absolutely loved Mother of Tears by Dario Argento)

17. Nobody because I'm aroace.

18. No way.

19. No. And besides, I don't want to marry anyone.

20. I guess? I'm kind of pagan.

21. Yes.

22. I don't think so?

23. I guess?

24. I don't like either.

25. I don't wear socks right now.

26. No.

27. No way, I want to be invisible.

28. Metal, classical, dark cabaret, future funk, vaporwave,...

29. I hate being naked, there's no way I'd do something like that.

30. Only one.

31. Uh... I don't know.

32. Same as above.

33. A hot chocolate with honey.

34. No.

35. No.

36. Doll

37. I don't know.

38. I don't remember.

39. Yes.

40. I hope no 😰

41. No, I suck at lying.

42. Uuuh... no?

43. Maybe?

44. No.

45. I don't know.

46. I took a test on internet once, and apparently I'm INTJ.

47. A cosplay, I guess?

48. Uh... I don't know.

49. Innie.

50. Right-handed.

51. No.

52. Spicy potato chips.

53. I don't know.

54. I'm quite messy.

55. No idea.

56. Same as above.

57. I don't know.

58. Nope.

59. Uh... I bite them.

60. Kinda?

61. I think so?

62. I'm okay, I guess...

63. No being able to be who I want.

64. No.

65. If it's not horror, I don't like it.

66. Depends...

67. No.

68. Uuh... Latin.

69. Introvert.

70. I'm scared of water and I can't even swim. How am I supposed to go scuba diving?

71. Humans...

72. No, I like being in the dark.

73. Yes, most of the time.

74. I won't answer that one, I hate being tickled.

75. No.

76. I don't think so...

77. Yes but I've never been drunk even as an adult.

78. No.

79. I don't crush on anyone.

80. 0, I don't want any.

81. Sometimes.

82. I don't know.

83. I don't run because I'm too weak for that.

84. Won't answer, I hate my natural hair color.

85. No idea. It's either blue or green.

86. I don't know.

87. No.

88. My father can't work anymore and my mother's searching for a job.

89. No. People say I'm young, but I feel like an old being wandering that earth.

90. Being misgendered or called a human. No, I'm not a girl, I'm either a "boy" or a "being". My appearance doesn't give you the right to call me a "girl". I'm... a bigender... agender man. And otherkin too, if you ever want to throw a "you're a human" at me.

91. My deadname or chosen name? If it's my deadname, I hate it to the bottom of my soul.

92. I don't want any kids.

93. I... don't want... kids. I already have my cat and he's like a son.

94. I don't have any.

95. Everything.

96. My chosen name comes from the rival in Isle of Armor DLC, the one exclusive to Pokémon Shield.

97. I don't even know who're my ancestors to begin with.

98. Yes.

99. I don't know.

100. I want to have the walls painted black.

Get To Know Me Uncomfortably Well

PLEASE DON’T LET THIS FLOP AHHHH

1. What is you middle name? 2. How old are you? 3. When is your birthday? 4. What is your zodiac sign? 5. What is your favorite color? 6. What’s your lucky number? 7. Do you have any pets? 8. Where are you from? 9. How tall are you? 10. What shoe size are you? 11. How many pairs of shoes do you own? 12. What was your last dream about? 13. What talents do you have? 14. Are you psychic in any way? 15. Favorite song? 16. Favorite movie? 17. Who would be your ideal partner? 18. Do you want children? 19. Do you want a church wedding? 20. Are you religious? 21. Have you ever been to the hospital? 22. Have you ever got in trouble with the law? 23. Have you ever met any celebrities? 24. Baths or showers? 25. What color socks are you wearing? 26. Have you ever been famous? 27. Would you like to be a big celebrity? 28. What type of music do you like? 29. Have you ever been skinny dipping? 30. How many pillows do you sleep with? 31. What position do you usually sleep in? 32. How big is your house? 33. What do you typically have for breakfast? 34. Have you ever fired a gun? 35. Have you ever tried archery? 36. Favorite clean word? 37. Favorite swear word? 38. What’s the longest you’ve ever gone without sleep? 39. Do you have any scars? 40. Have you ever had a secret admirer? 41. Are you a good liar? 42. Are you a good judge of character? 43. Can you do any other accents other than your own? 44. Do you have a strong accent? 45. What is your favorite accent? 46. What is your personality type? 47. What is your most expensive piece of clothing? 48. Can you curl your tongue? 49. Are you an innie or an outie? 50. Left or right handed? 51. Are you scared of spiders? 52. Favorite food? 53. Favorite foreign food? 54. Are you a clean or messy person? 55. Most used phrased? 56. Most used word? 57. How long does it take for you to get ready? 58. Do you have much of an ego? 59. Do you suck or bite lollipops? 60. Do you talk to yourself? 61. Do you sing to yourself? 62. Are you a good singer? 63. Biggest Fear? 64. Are you a gossip? 65. Best dramatic movie you’ve seen? 66. Do you like long or short hair? 67. Can you name all 50 states of America? 68. Favorite school subject? 69. Extrovert or Introvert? 70. Have you ever been scuba diving? 71. What makes you nervous? 72. Are you scared of the dark? 73. Do you correct people when they make mistakes? 74. Are you ticklish? 75. Have you ever started a rumor? 76. Have you ever been in a position of authority? 77. Have you ever drank underage? 78. Have you ever done drugs? 79. Who was your first real crush? 80. How many piercings do you have? 81. Can you roll your Rs?“ 82. How fast can you type? 83. How fast can you run? 84. What color is your hair? 85. What color is your eyes? 86. What are you allergic to? 87. Do you keep a journal? 88. What do your parents do? 89. Do you like your age? 90. What makes you angry? 91. Do you like your own name? 92. Have you already thought of baby names, and if so what are they? 93. Do you want a boy a girl for a child? 94. What are you strengths? 95. What are your weaknesses? 96. How did you get your name? 97. Were your ancestors royalty? 98. Do you have any scars? 99. Color of your bedspread? 100. Color of your room?

[mannaima]

Hey!! Never done a request before but maybe a subby riddler? And a virgin too? And you’re like his supervisor or any higher position and have to teach him everything?

Omgomgomgomg i've been waiting for this one!! For this request, riddler works at a library, much easier for me lmao, and ur in ur early 20s, he's the same old 35 year old hehehe.

Pairing: Riddler (Edward Nashton) x Female! Reader

Warnings: NSFW, subby riddler, virginity loss, overall a little awkward but cute riddler

Word count 3.2K

—--------------------------

There were very few places in Gotham that harbored any peace, and the one most people overlooked was the Library. Quiet, large, and full of knowledge, but most citizens ignored the books and opted for the computer room. You didn’t care much honestly, as long as the volume was low and nothing was damaged. You dressed rather modestly today, long skirt, a long sleeve with a light cardigan, the outside being pretty chilly. You hoped it wouldn’t rain, today happened to be the day you forgot your umbrella.

“So, are you ready to train your new coworker? He’s supposed to come at 9.” Your older coworker, Cindy, smiled at you. You had almost forgotten today was the day you had to train the new guy. You nodded, smiling to her as well, she was always extremely kind to you without fail.

“Mhm! As much as I love you Cindy, it’s a bit exciting to see a new face! It does get lonely when you aren’t here…” She laughed, and talked about her days before you worked there. It was true though, only you, Cindy and Dara, your other coworker, worked here. Understaffed, you couldn’t wrap your head around why people didn’t want to work here. Maybe because most of Gotham found books boring? You shook your head and stared at the clock.

8:53 AM

The door creaked open, and small footsteps began coming closer. Deep into your conversation with Cindy, you didn’t realize the man standing in front of you was your new coworker.

“Can I help you, sir?”

“Oh, Uhm, I'm Edward, I’m here for my first day…” You took a second and studied his face, mid 30s, sweet looking face, and a nervous demeanor. Your lips curled into a smile before you started your little introduction.

“Nice to meet you, Edward, welcome to the team! I’m gonna be training you today, let's get you a tour of the place. Follow me!” Although some could mistake your voice to be fake kindness, you were genuinely excited to have someone new, walking around the library, you gave him some information about yourself, as well as the library.

“I feel like I’ve seen you before, Ed, do you come here often?” He looked a little surprised, maybe because of the little nickname you gave him, but he nodded at your question.

“Y-yeah. At least every two weeks, to get a new book or return one, but I usually wear a hood and a face mask, maybe that's why you didn’t recognize me at first.” Edward seemed to come out of his shell a bit, but a part of you wanted to ask why he covered his face, though you didn’t want to embarrass him.

“Aw, such a shame, I wish I could’ve seen your cute face more!” You were truthful, he had an adorable smile, kinda like a cartoon cat or something. So sweet. Edward’s face went red, while he gave a smile and turned the other way.

“Oh, you don't mean that…But thanks…” He slowly became more open to you, talking more and responding to your questions with deeper answers.

He moved his way up in your heart.

—-------------------

Ed had worked here for a little over a month, and he was much more open to everyone now, talking more and even cracking jokes here and there. You recently were contacted by the county and were asked to take on more responsibility at the library, as Cindy was going to be retiring in a year or two. You became the manager basically, Cindy, Edward and Dara all being extremely proud of you. It was like a close knit family, and you couldn’t be happier. Edward even made the joke of calling you his “boss” and started to refer to you like that when you told him to do something.

“Right away, boss!” He said with a smile and saluted you. You giggled, Ed was adorable and funny, and you tried your best to send signals that you liked him, hoping he would like you back, but it seemed hopeless. You didn’t mind, it felt a little like rejection, but as long as he was still your friend, you were overjoyed.

“It’s almost time to close up, are you ready?” You had hardly realized it was already 8 pm, but you nodded at the man in front of you, his dorky smile bringing your heart rate up.

“Yep! Ready to go.” You smiled and stood up, dusting off your long skirt and grabbing your light coat from the coat rack. You prayed it wasn’t raining, as you had yet again forgotten your umbrella at home. But one step out of the building, and it was basically pouring. You groaned, the man behind you undoing his umbrella and set you underneath it as he locked the door.

“Forget to bring your umbrella again, boss? How irresponsible!” He exclaimed in a joking tone, giving you a small smile on your face.

“Sadly. I’ll just call a cab, you go on ahead Eddie.” He shook his head and wrapped his arm around your shoulder, subtly flexing his height.

“It would be most rude to leave my boss alone to catch a cab. I’ll walk you home, it's no issue for me.”

You shook your head. “No, it’s fine I promise, I can make it home, besides, I don’t wanna waste your time, you should get home before it gets too late, the streets aren’t safe.” He smiled and began walking in the direction of your home, arm still draped over you.

“I promise, it's no issue at all. C’mon, let's stick together so you don't get wet.”

It was a decent walk, around 20 minutes, which felt quick. Despite the annoyance of the rain, you both had a lot to talk about. How shitty Gotham was, which Edward was a little too passionate about, the newest books you were reading, and just your life in general. You stepped in front of your building and sighed, slightly sad to see him go, but an idea popped in your head.

“Hey! Wanna come in for a cup of coffee or some tea? I bet you're tired from all that walking, besides, you can dry up a little before you head back to your house.” It seems that thought brought him a little anxiety, because he started to stutter.

“Oh, um, I surely wouldn't want to be a bother.”

“It's no issue at all, come on, let's get in!” You basically dragged the man in your complex, his hands being a bit sweaty. You giggled at the way he was blushing and looking around, his hand still intertwined in yours. Once you reached your door, you fished in your purse for your keys, then allowing you to unlock your door, stepping inside, Eddie slowly following you.

“Home sweet home.” You smiled, removing your slightly wet jacket and sweater, leaving you in your thin long sleeve, which showed some cleavage.

“It's a little cold, don't worry, I’ll turn on the heat.” You went to turn up the thermostat to a warmer temp, with Edward just standing awkwardly in front of the closed door, unsure of what to do. You decided to play with him a little bit, just to see his reaction.

“Aw, you know you can take off your jacket Eddie, you’re wet. Here, let me help you.” You got close to him and unzipped his heavy blue jacket, leaving him in a green hoodie. He was just staring down at you, face flushed, mouth slightly agape and breathing heavy. You slipped your fingers on the green fabric and began to lift it up.

“Arms up, Eddie.” Your voice was sultry, quieter, but he obeyed without a second thought. You lifted the hoodie up, his stomach peeking out, revealing his happy trail. You giggled, and he was left in some random graphic t-shirt, while you put up the jackets on the coat rack.

“You’re so cute. Do you want coffee or tea?” It took a few seconds for him to fully register your words, brain still drunk on your touch, before he uttered a small ‘coffee’, which led you to turn on the coffee machine, enough to brew two cups. You sat down on your couch, and patted the seat beside you, to which he nodded and sat down, though almost on the direct opposite side of the couch. Either this guy was clueless or really didn’t like you, but you could tell it was the former, he was always staring at you, trying to talk to you, but was always a bit awkward with it.

You took the lead and scooted closer to him, his eyes widening, hands gripping his leg a little more.

“So, we’ve been working together for about a month, and I never asked. Have you ever dated a girl before.” You knew he wasn’t dating someone, about a week ago when Cindy teased him, saying he better get home quick for his girlfriend, he shook his head and said “no girlfriend for me, ma’am.”

“I, oh, I’ve never dated a girl before…” He seemed really embarrassed, he probably never told anyone before.

“Really? You’re such a nice guy. Cute too, these girls don’t know what they're missing out on.” You grabbed his hand, his mouth opened a bit, stuttering as he tried to find the right words to say, his mind going a million miles per second, and his heartbeat beating loud in his ears.

“So, I'm guessing you’ve never kissed a girl either, hm?” He was lost in thought, but barely had enough brain power to shake his head no. You got up and moved your body, which led you to straddling him, your face close to his.

“Can I be the first?” He was nodding furiously, face redder than ever before, your eyes closing as you leaned down to kiss him. He kissed back, unsure of what to do, your lips together felt electric. He was holding your waist, gently, as you began to move your tongue in his mouth, a whimper leaving his lips. You pet his hair as you both made out, passionately, and you began to feel something grow, looking down to see his erection hard and visible through his jeans.

“Looks like someone is excited.” He couldn’t tell if he wanted to die or blush at the fact he got hard from making it, but it didn't seem like you were upset.

Just as you were going to touch it, the ding for the coffee pot went off, leaving you to giggle as you stood up.

“How do you like your coffee, Ed?” He couldn’t believe it, he had just gotten his first kiss, even more, he got to make out with his crush. He couldn’t give a fuck about the coffee, the girl he fanticized about every night before he slept, the girl he jerked off to, the girl he woke up every morning for, she likes him. He was lost in thought, all his dreams coming true right in front of him, barely realizing you sat back next to him, holding out his cup of coffee.

—--------------------

Talking over a nice cup of coffee, the rain outside hitting the window, and the warm atmosphere, the perfect recipe for sleepiness. You hardly realized it was already 10, which made you a little nervous for Edward.

“Well, I guess I better get home, it’s l-”

“How about you spend the night? It’s far too dangerous to walk and a cab is so expensive. Besides, we don’t have work tomorrow since the library is closed?” You did your best at puppy eyes, trying your hardest to convince him to stay.

“No no, I’ve already bothered you enough.” Without even letting him get another word, you stood up in front of him and stroked his cheek.

“Come on, please? I hate sleeping in an empty bed… I’d rather sleep in your arms.” Cheesy, but you hoped it would convince him. He seemed to fold quickly, nodding at you, eye contact heavy. You smiled, and grabbed his hand and led him into your bedroom.

“Let's get into bed then… You wanna borrow my pj pants? I’m sure they’ll fit you.” You dug through your drawer and handed them to him, while looking for your own sleepwear. You found a cute silk nightgown, comfortable and easy to slip on. You slipped off the undershirt you wore, the cold air hitting your skin as you threw it in the basket, and began to unbutton your pants.

Edward hadn’t even had the chance to take off his own, eyes transfixed on you. You were clad in your bra, and he began to see your panties as you slipped off your pants. He was breathing heavily, no porn he watched could ever compare to this. He doesn’t think he's been this hard in his life. His heart nearly stopped when you unbuttoned your bra, your tits dropping as you took off the black item. You smiled, knowing this would get a good reaction from him, but pretended you were nonchalant.

You slipped on the nightgown and turned to look at him, a small smirk forming on your face as another idea grew in your head.

“Need help changing?” You didn’t give him much of a chance to say anything, but his head nodded yes slightly. You walked towards him and rubbed his cock through his jeans, a whimper leaving Edwards lips. You took the liberty of unbuttoning the jeans and began to slide them down his legs.

“Fuck, you’re big…” You could see the imprint of his erection through his boxers, your mouth salivating at the idea of fucking him. You blurted out the first thing that came to your head.

“Are you a virgin, Eddie?” You looked up at him from your position of being on your knees, his eyes squinted as he winced, but his head eventually nodded yes, as you smirked at him.

“Can I go further Eddie?” You wanted to make sure he was comfortable, you didn’t want his first time to be over before it started. He shook his head yes, to which you immediately pulled down his boxers, which let his cock spring up. It was huge, practically hitting you in the face as you stared lovingly at it. You gave the tip a small lick, to which he moaned loudly, boosting your ego.

“Awww, Eddie’s sensitive…” Instead of going slow for him, you spit on the tip and began to bob your head, making him whimper and moan, with a quiet “please” or “yes” spilling from his pink lips. You had half of his cock in your mouth, saliva drooling down your face, eyes staring into his half-lidded ones. You smiled, as best one could with a dick in their mouth, and let out his cock with a ‘pop’ noise. You continued to jerk him off while you spoke to him.

“Mmmm, your first blowjob. I hope you like it. Where do you wanna cum?” He could barely sputter out a word, mind jumbled as you continued to jerk him off with a sly smile on his face.

“Mmm, on-on, in, your m-mouth.” It took him a while, but you nodded and began to suck him off once again, cheeks hollowed as you rocked your head back and forth. It hadn’t even been a full minute and he let out a long and loud moan, followed up by the jerking of his hips as he came. You could feel the spurts of cum hitting the back of your throat, doing your best not to gag, swallowing it all. He almost cried at how good it felt, his own hand could never compare.

You stood up, although you were shorter than him, the dominance you radiated was more than enough to make him feel inferior. You grabbed him by the collar and pushed him onto the bed, a small whimper coming out of him.

“Awwww, little Eddie looks all fucked out. You wanna make your boss happy, don’t you?” He nodded furiously, looking desperate, almost pathetic.

“I’m gonna ride you, that's ok?” He kept nodding, hair clung to his forehead from the sweat he was producing. You climbed over him, slipping off your panties in the process, and straddled over him. Despite cumming less than one minute ago, he was already hard. You didn’t complain, you were excited to take a man's virginity. To most, the idea of the 30 year old virgin made them cringe, but to you, it was adorable and sexy. Edward was the sweetest guy you’ve ever met, a gentleman, funny, and the fact he was a virgin was like the cherry on an already perfect sundae.

You slowly sat yourself on his cock, tip enough to make you whimper and to make Ed squirm. You suddenly pushed the entire thing inside you, making both you and Edward moan out, the girth filling you and the warmth perfect. You loved how innocent he was, he just stared at you, and slowly reached his hand over to hold yours.

“You, you feel really good… Really t-tight…” Leaning over, you gave him a kiss on his mouth and pulled away.

“You’re so big Eddie… Such a good boy for me.” You began to lift yourself and bounce back down, making him squeeze your hand harder as pleasure shot through the both of you. He was such a gentleman, holding your waist, guiding you up and down, and shakily leaning over to kiss your lips once more. You could feel him come apart in your hands, you smiled down at him, bouncing yourself faster, his head leaning back as he whimpered.

“I can’t hold it, I’m gonna cum. Please…” You urged him, telling him to cum, to fill you up. He nodded his head so many times, whimpers turning into moans as he made a high pitched moan and came, orgasm riding out for such a long time. Cum filled you up, it felt so good, you swore he came buckets, it began to flow out. You pulled yourself off slowly, but so much cum spilled out, he was embarrassed. You could see in his flushed face that he was going to apologize, but you shut him up with a kiss.

“You were so good. Such a good boy. Are you happy you lost your virginity, baby?”

“Y-yes. You’re so pretty, and h-hot. I'm glad I lost it to you, I really like you a lot, you’re the reason I love work so much. The reason I love life, I love you-” He stopped himself, oh no, he fucked up. He just told you that he loved you! He was gonna cry, praying to every god that he didn’t just mess everything up.

You kissed him, hand stroking his cheek, and you pulled away smiling.

“I love you too, Edward.”

[eddieleemunson]

1. Hypocritical behavior and lying.

2. Honesty and boobs... maybe also being turned on by me but it's not entirely necessary.

3. Um... zodiac isn't my thing. So, no. No I am not.

4. Santa isn't real? Who the hell brought me the entire pound of weed last Christmas?

5. Hmmm... well I'm still a virgin but I did get a rather disappointing blowjob from a sad groupie at the Hideout after a show.

6. I was 12 and she told everyone that I kissed her but she kissed me. It was way too much spit for my liking.

7. I was about 14 and it was this kid from down the street. Same age as me but out of my league at that point. I refuse to name them though.

8. I have a top three. "Your ass looks good in those jeans" "You have beautiful eyes" and "You are nowhere near as scary as I was lead to believe"

9. Well... this question has been answered. I haven't had sex yet.

10. "I don't care"

11. Hate is a strong word which is why I use it for Jason Carver.

12. Yes. My nipples. No, I won't show you unless you buy me some beers first.

13. Yup, they all have different meanings some are just there because I thought they were cool.

14. Yes. My mom and sometimes my dad but not nearly as much as I miss my mom.

15. Yes. Cigarettes and pot.

16. Not that I'm aware of.

17. Oh, probably hundreds at this point.

18. Yup.

19. Yes.

20. No.

21. Yes. My dad.

22. Same as the last answer.

23. No. I am myself and I happen to enjoy being myself.

24. Oh... I don't know... I think it takes it a sociopath to not cry over a lover.

25. Um... no one has ever danced with me.

26. No

27. No but I'd love it

28. Oh hell yes... well she was a substitute but her name was Veronica Smits. She was so fucking hot!

29. Yes

30. No.

31. Yup both ways but one was an accident

32. No

33. Not intentionally but honestly... I doubt it ever happen.

34. I'm not big on lying. My old man did a lot of that and I really don't want to be like him.

35. Fuck no! My friends have horrible taste.

36. All of the time. In fact, one of my favorite pics to do that too is one of Wonder Woman, Linda Carter.

37. Yeah

38. I may be the town freak but I'm not an asshole. So, no.

39. Yes.

40. Sold drugs for a while to afford my van.

41. Depends on who you ask.

42. About 150 lbs.

43. 5'10

44. Still got my virginity. Lucky me.

45. My mom.

46. Naveed. That is the only one worth a damn the rest are total creeps.

47. Mulan, she is one tough gal. Her or Moana even though neither of them are technically a princess.

48. Cher

49. The person and the ungodly amount of saliva.

50. Probably a better fucking world than we live in now. The last thing I watched was Leverage. Bad guys getting their comeuppance never makes me sad.

51. This morning.

52. This morning.

53. The Green Mile or Stand By Me

54. 11 pretty much all the time

55. Um... not sure I should talk about that.

56. Plaid print boxers

57. I am neurodivergent as shit so any and everything all of the time.

58. Shit... idk. The whole package if I am being honest.

59. Probably a lot of them but the one that comes to mind the most is blowing my nose in the shower or using the same old shirt to wipe up after I jerk off.

60. Lying or trying to fix me. I'm not broken. One more girl trying to get me to talk to my father while he rots in prison and I swear I will pull myself bald.

61. Well I suppose it's about perspective. Others would say DnD. I say the weird thing I love is ketchup on my scrambled eggs.

62. Physically it has to be eyes. Personality it's kindness and understanding.

63. How long ita taking to answer these questions.

64. DnD, my friends, my guitar, my family.

65. Thinking about what it might be like if I still had my parents.

66. I'm a young man... I think we all know what it is I do when no one is watching.

67. I cry or I do the same thing I do when no one is watching.

68. My sweetheart. Thanks to Uncle Wayne.

69. My friendship.

70. I'm not sure I have really overcame any of my fears.

71. Four days but not by choice

72. Legal age

73. My friendship

74. A pair of socks that had the Motley Crue logo on them. I can't stand those pricks

75. Dying all by myself. I don't think I could handle dying alone.

76. I'm poor. I don't have one.

77. Pretty sure you have figured that out with all the other answers I've given.

78. My shirts can't get pregnant thank God.

79. None

80. 🤷‍♂️

81. "Do you need an ounce or....?"

82. I poked myself in the eye while pulling the blankets up.

83. Same thing because how dumb is that shit.

84. That is classified information that only friends get to know.

85. When I poked my eye.

86. Cher

87. Cher

88. Buttercup and Westley

89. My best friend

90. Uncle Wayne and yes he smokes pot

91. Not a damn thing

92. Hahahaha yes

93. Yup

94. I am a gentleman. But I have gotten a few naughty pics of a floofy haired idiot.

95. No

96. No

97. No

98. Hahahahahahaha all the damn time

99. Yes

100. No

“Q&A’s”

Questions to ask

1. What is your biggest turn off in a person?

2. What is your biggest turn on in a person?

3. Are you like your zodiac sign suggests that you should be?

4. At what age did you realize Santa was not real?

5. At what age did you have your first sexual experience?

6. At what age did you have your first kiss?

7. At what age did you have your first crush? Who was it?

8. What is the best compliment you have ever received?

9. What is the best sex you’ve ever had?

10. What is the biggest lie you ever told?

11. Do you hate anyone right now?

12. Do you have any hiding piercing’s? If yes, where?

13. Do you have any tattoos? If yes what do they mean?

14. Do you miss anyone right now?

15. Do you smoke?

16. To your knowledge, have you ever been cheated on?

17. Have you ever been in a physical fight?

18. Have you ever been in a relationship?

19. Have you ever been in love?

20. Have you ever been loved by someone you didn’t love back?

21. Have you ever loved someone that didn’t love you back?

22. Have you ever been betrayed by someone you care about?

23. Have you ever catfished anyone?

24. Have you ever cried over a lover?

25. Have you ever danced without leaving room for Jesus?

26. Have you ever dated someone you met online?

27. Have you ever given or received a hickey?

28. Have you ever had a crush on a teacher?

29. Have you ever kissed a non-family member on the lips?

30. Have you ever kissed for more than two hours consecutively?

31. Have you ever kissed or been kissed on the breast?

32. Have you ever kissed someone below the belt?

33. Have you ever lead a person on?

34. Have you ever lied to get out of trouble?

35. Have you ever liked a person your friend was dating?

36. Have you ever masturbated to a picture or video?

37. Have you ever played a game involving stripping?

38. Have you ever used somebody for your personal gain?

39. Have your ever been heart-broken?

40. How far have you gone to get something you desired?

41. How many relationships have you had?

42. What do you weight?

43. How tall are you?

44. If applicable, when did you lose your virginity?

45. If you could bring back a person from the dead who would you bring back?

46. If you could choose one Disney prince to marry who would you choose?

47. If you could choose one Disney princess to be your best friend who would you chose?

48. If you could get married to any celebrity who would it be?

49. If you could, what would you change about your first kiss?

50. If you had to live in the world of the last T.V show you watched where would you be living?

51. When was the last time you insulted someone?

52. When was the last time you were insulted?

53. Mention a movie that always makes you cry?

54. On a scale of 1-10, 10 being the highest, how horny are you?

55. What is the scariest thing you have ever experienced?

56. What color of underwear are you wearing right now?

57. What do you think about the most?

58. What do you think is your sexiest feature?

59. What is a disgusting habit you have?

60. What is a relationship deal breaker for you?

61. What is a weird thing you love?

62. What is the sexiest feature you love in the opposite gender?

63. Mention something that is currently bothering you?

64. Mention something that makes you happy?

65. Mention something that makes you sad?

66. Mention something you do when no one is watching?

67. What is something you like to do when you are sad?

68. What is the best gift you ever received

69. What is the best gift you have ever given?

70. What is the biggest fear you have overcome?

71. What is the longest you have ever gone without a shower?

72. What is the major physical trait you look for in a partner?

73. What is the worst gift you have ever given?

74. What is the worst gift you have ever received?

75. What is your biggest fear?

76. What is your favorite holiday destination?

77. What is your relationship with your parents like?

78. Have you ever had a pregnancy scare?

79. What is your worst sexual experience?

80. What is your zodiac sign?

81. What was the last text you sent?

82. What was the last thing that made you cry?

83. What was the last thing that made you laugh?

84. When is your birthday?

85. When was the last time you cried?

86. Which celebrity would be your hall pass?

87. Who is your celebrity crush?

88. Who is your favorite fictional couple?

89. Who was the first person you ever fell in love with?

90. Who was the last person you texted?

91. Would you ever change anything about yourself and if so what would it be?

92. Have you ever been caught masturbating?

93. Have you ever sent a sexually explicit text?

94. Have you ever sent or received sexually explicit photographs?

95. Have you ever engaged in sexually explicit activity over video chat?

96. Have you ever cheated on a significant other during a relationship?

97. Have you ever been walked in on during sex?

98. Have you ever used marijuana?

99. Have you ever been arrested?

100. Have you ever been convicted of a crime?

[cno-inbminor]

iterum vivere (childe/tartaglia)

a/n: wow, it’s been fucking forever. first genshin fic featuring childe/tartaglia!!! a very huge thank you to @suspensin​ for reading this over and being my rock and support, and i love her so fucking much. I couldn’t have finished this without her!

plot: reincarnation and modern/uni!au ft. afab reader!traveler with she/they pronouns x childe/tartaglia 

-- in which meeting childe is a bit of a dangerous game of push and pull

wc: 12.1k; angst + fluff

warnings:  DOES CONTAIN IN-GAME SPOILERS (1.5? 1.6? + story quest and idek) and NSFW MENTIONS (mdni to be safe). there’s no explicit smut but thoughts do run a bit wild here and there

EDIT: Altered ChiLumi version now posted on AO3 here!

“Haven’t we met before?”

The shine in your eyes does nothing to hide your curiosity, head even tilting a little in observation. He watches them scan his face for any recognizable features, but attempts to focus on the strange, taut string of déjà vu that pulls him toward you. In a moment of absentmindedness, he had heard a faint voice call out his name from your direction. Confusion overtook him as you weren’t looking at him, but something inside his brain said that it had to be from you. And so his feet redirected his path towards your figure in the student union building, as if on a mission.

“A fucking whale, Childe?”

Oh.

“I don’t think so…?” You trail off, curiosity now replaced by perplexed feelings. “Do we have a class together?”

I think I would’ve noticed you by now if you were.

“Ah, what’s your major?” Childe asks quickly to avoid listening to the little voice in his head.

“History and anthropology, you?”

“Economics, but I’ve taken a history course for core credits. Maybe it was then?”

“With Dr. Zhong?”

“Yes!” He snaps his fingers. Part of his brain decides to usefully function and scan his memories to see if he remembers your face or head of hair in the lecture hall then. “Last year? Tuesdays and Thursdays from 10 to 11:20?”

“Actually, yeah,” you affirm in surprise. You think you would remember the relatively attractive ginger in your class, but honestly, it had all been such a blur and you were often pretty sleepy during class. Dr. Zhong didn’t quite appreciate it, but you made up for it with your exam and essay grades, as well as paying better attention in some of his other courses.

“Did you need me for anything?”

“I’d like for you to come visit and meet my family.”

He’s really not appreciating this extra voice speaking for him.

“Well…uh…” Childe stammers and looks away sheepishly, hand rubbing the back of his neck. He honestly had no reason for approaching you, and now, he just looks like a desperate idiot. Think quick, he tells himself, floundering for some shitty excuse.

“I wanted to, uh, take another history course as an elective and um, wanted to know if you had any recommendations?”

“Oh,” you blink. That’s a first. When he meets your gaze, the swirling shades of sapphire strike something deep within you. Flashes of events you can’t make out go by in the blink of an eye, but then you realize you’ve been staring for too long. Blood rushes to your cheeks because you don’t exactly want this guy to get the wrong idea from you, because how are you supposed to explain, “I’m sorry, but I think we have met before, but just a really, really long time ago, and we might’ve been more than just acquaintances because that’s what it feels like?”

“I think you’d like Teyvat Mythology,” your voice wavers on the verge of cracking. “Dr. Zhong might have a TA this time around, but Xiao’s a great teacher. Doesn’t have long, rambling anecdotes, but explains things well and gets straight to the point.”

“C-cool, I’ll look into it,” Childe replies and smiles brightly. “I’ll head out then,” jabbing a thumb over his shoulder, where he just realized he left a grouchy Scaramouche waiting by a vending machine, newly purchased Starbucks Tripleshot drink in hand. “Nice seeing you, (y/n).”

He scurries off before you both realize that you never told him your name.

“Who’s that?” Scaramouche asks, jutting his chin in your vague direction.

“Someone from my Intro to Liyuean History course last year,” Childe waves off. “Come on, let’s go before the line at the pasta bar gets too long.”

-

The next time you see Childe is by accident, traversing across an open field of grass that many students like to sit out on to relax with friends, sunbathe, hold events, or play casual team sports if room permits.

You had your earbuds in and were scrolling through social media when laughter rang above all other sound, causing your head to snap up and swivel around to find the source. And while it might’ve been strange to an outsider, your steps immediately slowed as you watched the man of your tiring, vivid dreams sprint in your direction, eyes pinned on a frisbee heading towards him.

He’s wearing a grey sports tank and basketball shorts, headband holding back his bangs as he makes a slight jump in the air to catch the plastic disc between his palms. His feet plant into the grass as he looks for someone to pass it to, and you watch (with embarrassment) the muscles in his throwing arm relax and tighten with practice, frisbee steadily soaring through the air in a beautiful arc towards a teammate. He then lightly jogs to get closer to his group, but then his back stiffens.

Before your instincts kick in for you to turn and bail, he looks over his shoulder and stares straight at your now stunned self.

The sole ruby earring that glints in the sunlight catches your attention, and you recall your dreams of terrifyingly dark, violet electric power, blades of water rushing toward you, and then the stomach-churning sensation of falling from great heights pours concrete into your veins—

Childe looks a little amused for having your sole focus, hand lifting up for a quick wave. And as you numbly return the greeting, your heart beats out, “Run from him.”

And so with the flight response pulsing and firing from your synapses, you abruptly speed walk away, almost breaking out into a sprint towards your dorm. You ignore his pointed, confused look, and pretend you don’t feel the two holes of imaginary fire searing into your back. It isn’t until you’re laying back in bed that you release a huge sigh of relief and pray to a deity you don’t believe in that those eyes of mirth will not haunt you tonight.

But of course, with a deity that doesn’t exist, the prayers go unanswered.

-

“Do you believe in any of the mythology you teach?” You ask Xiao about a few days later when you stop by his cubicle. Luckily, no one else is around for this conversation, and Xiao has always been kind enough to humor your thoughts. Granted, he might feel obligated because you had asked Dr. Zhong to be your advisor for your undergraduate Honors thesis, and Xiao was directed to be your receiver of some general questions and source of information if he wasn’t around.

A quick scan of your complexion tells Xiao everything he needs to know. Your eyes are overtaken with rumination and exhaustion, haziness clouding them as you seem to ponder over your own question. It’s not often that you ask him anything not related to your thesis or coursework.

“Perhaps there’s some sense and truth to the tales passed down,” he softly muses. “What makes you ask?”

You lift yourself to sit on the clean area next to his computer, legs slowly swaying back and forth. “It might sound crazy but...I’ve been having dreams lately. They feel too real, too natural to be anything that my mind would make up. I’ve never had the most creative imagination by any means, which is why there’s some comfort to me being a history major, but I can’t shake these.”

“So why ask me about the mythology?”

“...the Archons are there. I even dreamt that I met the Geo and Anemo Archons. And they controlled various elements, just like we were taught.”

You don’t notice that Xiao has ceased his rapid typing, fingers hovering over the keyboard before one hand removes his glasses from his face. He uses the other to rub his eyes and softly pinch the bridge of his nose before sliding the frames back on. Dark, golden amber eyes survey you as you grapple with the unfathomable possibilities of your nightly visions, at least until you shake your head in disbelief at yourself and lightly scoff.

“Who am I kidding?” You ask no one in particular. “Maybe I’ve been doing too much research and everything’s mixing together.”

“You’re ahead of schedule, if that provides any consolation.”

“Some.”

-

It takes Childe a grand total of one minutes and 53 seconds to sign up for Teyvat Mythology for the spring semester.

-

WInter in Liyue is only slightly miserable, being so close to the ocean. It’s chillier than usual on this dreary day, yet something compelled you to exit your dorm and shakily make your way to the campus coffee shop for a warm drink. Coffee, hot chocolate, you haven’t quite decided yet, but just as you let yourself bask in the warm building, familiar ginger hair and blue eyes wash away the comfort.

Or do they douse you in security?

They remind you of your recent dreams that now have shifted away from stress and violence to easygoing summer days by the oceanside, running barefoot in the sand while collecting beautifully patterned azure starconches. Sometimes, you thrust a hand towards an oversized four-leaf clover on a wooden stake with the power of wind and catch yourself in the air, soaring and looking around to find more of the little shells. Other nights, they consist of climbing steep cliffs, only to sit at the edge in the clouds with fatigue wracking through your system and marvel at the view before you.

Someone’s always with you though, ruby earring and maroon mask and cobalt blue gem hanging from the waist, sprinting with you, playfully tackling you down, pulling you up towards mountain peaks, laying their head on your shoulders, brushing their lips against your cheek--

You welcome the change of peace in those dreams, but only because they don’t leave you quite as tired the next day, as if you’d been avoiding an inescapable dark force.

Part of you wants the burning question of why this person, this man, in all his glory and brightness, affects you so fucking much when you barely even know the guy -- why looking at him sends your heart to lodge itself in your esophagus, why your lungs feel like they’re so close to being completely collapsed under the weight of his stare, why feeling like you’re trapped and  caught between wanting to run towards yet away from him.  It makes no sense, and you’re tired of trying to make sense of anything you don’t exactly want to remember from your dreams for some, once again, inexplicable reason.

But there’s no time to think as he quickly ambles towards you, your own feet shuffling forward to meet him in a warped reference of a distance that constitutes to “the middle” before you can stop yourself. Your shivering hasn’t quite stopped yet, and Childe seems to take notice of it.

“Pretty cold out there,”  he softly states. It’s cute, the way you’re curling in on yourself to retain some warmth.

“Y-yeah, not sure why I decided I really needed something warm to drink right now,” you reply and avoid his gaze. He watches you peer over his shoulder to squint at the menu display hanging from the ceiling, seemingly contemplating on what you should get.

“How about I get yours today? My treat for your class recommendation last time.” Anything to keep you here longer. Childe doesn’t realize how much he’s missed you, which confuses him, and chooses to ignore the fact that he’d been camping himself at the study tables in the building where the history department is located in hopes of even just catching a quick glimpse of you.

“Oh, you don’t have to do that,” you immediately attempt to subvert his generous offer, hands shooting out from your jacket pockets and waving in rejection. “It was nothing.”

“Please?” Childe puts on his best puppy eyes before reaching for one of your wrists, gently tugging you to the register. “Just this once?”

You want so badly to squash the tiny flare of disappointment that erupts in your chest from the newly acquired knowledge that this was just a one time thing. Do econ majors hate to feel in debt? That they must be even with everyone, or would rather have people indebted to them than the other way around?

There’s no time to think when Childe gives the cashier his order before turning to you, and without wanting to waste anyone’s time, you rattle off your usual beverage. He’s quick in fishing out his student ID to spend some of his campus currency, shooting you a boyish grin when you pout at your half-opened wallet.

“Go take that table over there,” he says, pointing to one in the corner by some windows. “I’m gonna tell my friends to go on without me.”

“I didn’t mean to intrude or pull you away from them,” you slightly panic. The sooner you can leave, the better. Right? “You don’t need to sit with me, I was just gonna head back to my dorm.”

“I insist. Go ahead, I’ll be right there.”

Why your brain takes his orders over your own is a mystery in and of itself, because before you know it, you’re plopped down in one of the lounge seats and staring off into space, mind reeling over the last two minutes. You pretend you can’t hear the way Childe’s friends nudge his arm playfully with their shoulders, wiggling their eyebrows suggestively as Childe tries to get them to stop being nonsensical.

“You’re gonna scare them off,” he hisses at them, hands pushing at their backs so they could finally leave him to his devices.

“Not before you do!” One of them laughs and Childe groans at their antics. “All right, all right, we’ll go. They’re cute though, might steal them if you don’t make a move.”

The darkening of the aura surrounding Childe is too quick for them to fully process, not before he dampens any of their fleeting hopes with a, “Don’t even fucking think about it.”

But it disappears just as fast when his and your drinks are called out, and he gives them one last shove before retrieving your to-go cups. Childe directs all his focus towards the seat diagonally from yours as opposed to the one that’s straight across, and you’re sharply ripped away from whatever reverie you let yourself slip into.

“Thank you,” you murmur, hands cupping the drink and feeling the heat seep into your fingertips. “You really didn’t have to, it was nothing big.”

“Can you blame me for just trying to find an excuse to finally talk to you?” He asks without a skip and you can’t tell if the quickening of your heartbeat is from a looming sense of doom or excitement. Those eyes, the tiny swirls of the ocean, blue like those shells buried in the sand--

It takes three seconds too long for you to understand where he was going with in his words, and part of you feels unamused at his smooth talking. You’ve always guarded yourself against guys like Childe, devilishly handsome who know their way around language semantics, ready to pull you in and just as ready to push you away. That (possibly unfair) bias, coupled with everything else you’ve been feeling for him, sounded the alarms and set the walls up around your heart. Perhaps you need to stop wearing your heart on your sleeve, because Childe immediately retracts his forwardness.

“I’m sorry, I don’t mean to make you uncomfortable. I promise I’m not looking for anything in return and you don’t owe me anything, but I really did just...want to sit and talk and...get to know you?” Childe trails off a little towards the end. Your body loosens up and relaxes just a tiny bit, feeling bad for your snap judgment. Let the guy do something nice, don’t look into it too much, you tell yourself. It’s a coffee, not a five-course dinner.

You reach out a hand towards him, small smile across your lips, ready for his to join yours in a quick handshake. “I’m (y/n), senior history and anthropology double major. It’s nice to meet you.”

The pounding of your heart against your ribcage has nothing to do with the shimmering of his eyes, nothing to do with the fact that his hand fits with yours just right, and nothing to do with the fact that an eerily similar voice from your dreams whispers, “I love you.”

You learn a number of things about Tartaglia in the four hours, like his family members and their respective interests, which classes he did and didn’t enjoy taking, certain takes on Schnezhnayan politics, his own various hobbies, crazy accidents from the occasional college parties, and more. He’s a bit of an open book, probably telling you way more than any regular person would, and definitely more than anything you revealed during all this time. Everything you tell him seems surface level, nothing too deep. The walls are still there to protect you from the unexplainable, profound feelings his presence seems to elicit, and luckily, he doesn’t prod any further. Childe feels the resistance and respects it, which just adds more brownie points in your book, and you almost feel bad for having given so little in return.

“I wish we were taking Teyvat Myth together,” he sighs when walking you back to your dorm, hands stuffed in his pockets. His ruby earring catches the light from the sunset, the shade almost complimentary to the golden amber rays that streak across the sky. “Would’ve helped having a history major in there.”

“Is that all I am to you, an answer bank?” You jokingly ask, but he watches concerningly as you shoot your gaze to the ground, mindfully stepping over the cracks between concrete slabs.

“Of course not,” a gentle sincerity reaches you, giving you the confidence to make eye contact with him. “I’m sorry for making it sound like that, it wasn’t my intention. I really just meant it as a way of saying if the professor or TA ended up being a total bore, then well, having you would make it more fun.”

“I’m sure I’d bore you even more,” chuckling, speeding up to get away. You’re growing too comfortable in whatever atmosphere Childe has created, like an enclosed air bubble bobbing gently in the depths of the sea and letting the waves carry you both to whichever ends of the earth.

“Hey,” he interjects, hand reaching out to stop you with a soft yank of your wrist. There is no resisting force from you, feet stepping backward until he meets you eye to eye. It’s unfair in the way that he can render you motionless by standing just an inch from you, arms brushing with his head tilted closer to your own. “Seriously, I’m glad we did this today. Are you?”

No, because now I don’t know what to think, I don’t know who you are, I’m not any closer to figuring out why you terrify yet leave me so enamoured with you, I’m torn between punching and kissing you and--

“Yes,” you subconsciously answer, brain immediately short-circuiting to scold yourself. “I had fun.”

His grin, charming, devilish, is so so bright, bright enough to rival the Liyue sun that sits on the pier, on the edge of the ocean, bright enough to rival the love that your fraternal twin showers you with on a daily basis. You want time to stop right here because you’re almost sick of the voice settled deep within your heart that screams, “Don’t get comfortable, you must run from him!”

“Good. Let’s do this again?” And you nod, of course you do. Foolish you. “Don’t be a stranger!” He calls out as he turns on his heel and waves over his shoulder, hand raised in the air, and you’re suddenly transported to another scene, a less refined version of the Liyue Harbor, watching as the head of ginger hair with a red mask in a flashier attire of grey and maroon walks away from you and onto a roaring, magnificent ship; big, ivory sails only seen in books and museums. It’s the same gesture of “see you later”, and just before he turns, you blink, and you’re back to seeing your campus again.

But Childe does look back once, warm and content that you’re still standing there, watching over him, and he can’t help but think about when he can spend time with you again, because suddenly, it truly feels like there’s not enough of it anymore.

-

“Excuse me, what’s a Red Bull?”

The last thing, or person rather, you expect to see on the last day of finals for the fall semester, is a small boy who looks way too young to be here, tugging on the sleeve of your windbreaker. He’s at most eleven, ten maybe, but he has eerily similar characteristics, as well as an accent that doesn’t quite belong to most Liyue natives. Still gathering your bearings from your own perusing of the fridges that hold all the possible beverages a college student could consume, you kneel down until you’re at eye level with the child.

“Repeat that for me? Are you looking for a Red Bull, you say?”

“Yes!” He beams and holds out a student ID that most definitely doesn’t belong to him. “My brother asked me to grab him one because he was busy with something.”

Your eyes flit over to the top shelves where the aforementioned cans of caffeine are located, and definitely too high for someone of his height to reach. “I’ll grab one for you. Did he ask for a specific flavor?”

“Nope, he said regular. Thanks, you’re really nice! Do you know my brother?” He asks, waving the ID at you so you can get a better look at the name. That’s definitely a face you recognize, but the name leaves you confused.

“Yeah, um,” glance over again, “I know...Ajax…”

“He’s the best toy seller in the whole world!”

Somehow, it suits him much better than Childe or Tartaglia, and you’re not quite sure what toys have anything to do with the matter at hand. Speaking of hands, the little boy grabs yours in sheer delight. “Can you take me back to his room? I kinda forgot the directions he told me, and everything’s so big around here.”

“Sure, just let me buy something, too, and I’ll take you.”

“Okay!”

The cashier isn’t the least bit fazed by the little brunette at your side -- it’s always common for family members to come in around the end of semesters to pick up kids or visit, and being an open building with snacks and drinks and a stopping point of most tours, they’ve seen it all. You even let him pick out a bag of chips and a candy bar for himself for being so polite and not a complete menace, paying with your own campus currency.

Teucer, as you’ve learned in the last two minutes, likes to point out things and ask you questions. Luckily, you have answers to most of them and do your best to pad the time, enjoying the feeling of a tiny hand wrapped around three of your fingers. It’s sweet to any normal passerby, believing they’re witnessing an older sister doting on their little brother around the holidays, but to Childe, seeing the tender sweetness on your face as you nod along to whatever Teucer is rambling about to you, sets his heart aflame. He’s already constantly on the verge of wanting to hug and kiss you and never let go, but you haven’t made any indication that you could potentially like him back, and this is just torture.

“Look what they bought me!” Teucer shoves his rewards in Childe’s face as if he had extremely poor eyesight, and you can’t help but laugh a little as you set his Red Bull down on his desk, clutching your own preferred beverage while looking around his room. Finals must have gotten to him with the unusual lack of tidiness in the small space, some laundry strewn here and there, a couple boxes of eaten microwave dinners in the metal wire trash can, some textbooks left open and marked with more sticky notes than you’ve ever seen. You’d only been here once before to drop off some food that he desperately messaged you about, stuck doing a project that he just couldn’t step away from.

“Pretend you don’t see the mess,” Childe pleads, handing a kid tablet to his brother but holding on before Teucer can take it. “What do you say to our nice friend here for buying you these snacks?”

“Thank you!”

“It was nothing,” you shyly smile, ruffling his hair. “I enjoyed meeting you.”

“Wait, what’s your name again?”

“It’s (Y/n).”

“Okay, (y/n)! Wait…(y/n)..as in…”

Teucer trails off and gives a look to his brother, one that spells curiosity and trouble, before he grabs your hand and pulls you into a corner. Any movement Childe makes to leave his desk chair is immediately squashed by Teucer’s disapproval, and the older man is left to helplessly worry when you’re told to squat down so secrets can be whispered into your ear.

“He talks about you a lot whenever he calls home,” and you want to laugh at Tecuer’s attempt to sound as scandalous as possible. “All the time! I think he likes you, like, like like.”

Oh. Oh dear.

“What makes you say that?” You whisper back, indulging both yourself and him, yet also internally snickering at how troubled Childe looks.

“Sometimes, he video calls mama, but we’ll all sit around and talk, and whenever he’s talking about how he saw you or something, he just looks...happy. Really happy.”

The surprise on your face does nothing to settle Childe’s nerves and he’s about to start wringing his hands together. Whatever Teucer was telling you couldn’t be good, probably embarrassing, like the one time he unceremoniously fell on his ass while ice skating over a frozen lake, or when he tried fitting fifteen marshmallows in his mouth and nearly choked on them when their mother caught them in the act, or--

“I think he just thinks of me as a good friend,” you try to inform Teucer, not letting yourself get any semblance of hope. “Nothing more, nothing less.”

“If you say so,” Teucer pouts. But then he stops whispering and bounds over back to his brother, grabbing the tablet before plopping down on the half-made bed.

“Look, I was overconfident and thought I could execute a perfect single loop on the ice, but there was a rock and I lost balance and--”

“I wasn’t being told any stories about you falling on ice, but do tell me more,” you chuckle and take some joy in watching the blush spread across his cheeks. It’s easy to tell that he’s mentally berating himself for jumping to conclusions.

“Well, first off, thanks for buying him all that, and my drink, too,” he sighs. “I spoil him enough as it is.”

“I can see why it’s hard not to,” you smile knowingly. “So is it just him here? Where’s the rest of your family?”

“Funny story, he somehow managed to convince my parents to let him come here on his own as his first ever plane flight, so I had to pick him up yesterday from the airport. He’s flying back with me tomorrow.”

“And the RA?” You ask with an eyebrow raised.

“Ah...well...what he doesn’t know won’t hurt him? Speaking of, what was Teucer whispering to you about?”

There’s a pensiveness that overtakes you when you look at Teucer again, who’s happily playing some sort of game and completely oblivious to the rest of his surroundings. You won’t, can’t, take his words to heart, and will take them with a grain of salt at most.

“Nothing important. Although I did learn something new...Ajax?”

“Say my name -- fuck, say it, please--”

“I guess cat’s out of the bag,” he chuckles and looks away, absolutely unaware of the flare of heat that swirls in your stomach from the fleeting vision just now. “I came up with other nicknames as a kid to seem cooler, and they just stuck with me. Plus, the business world is full of people who just want something from you, or just a transactional relationship. I’d rather not give my real name to them, if you know what I mean.”

“That’s fair,” you nod and lean to sit on the edge of his desk. A thought pops into your head and you turn the words over in your head like a washing machine on the spin setting, teeth gnawing on the flesh of your bottom lip. If Teucer hadn’t been in the room, he would’ve been this close to kissing you.

“But if it’s worth anything,” your voice slowly, softly starts, cautious and wary of your thoughts. “I think...Ajax suits you best.”

Curse fate. Curse the legendary Archons. Curse karma and deities and spirits because all he wants to do right now is stand and tower over you, trap you between himself and his desk so you can’t escape, take those pretty lips between his until they’re bruised and swollen because of him, hear you call out his name in the throes of pleasure so he can finally replace his fantasies with tangible memories. The unnatural, magnetic pull that draws him to you is unbearable now -- he feels like he’ll lose the last tendrils of his sanity if he doesn’t do something.

You can’t stop him from slowly reaching out to grab one of your hands, lifting it towards him until he’s close enough for you to feel his breath ghost over your knuckles. It sends a shiver down your spine and blood is pounding in your ears because you can’t begin to fathom what he’s thinking about while doing this, even more so when his lips make contact with your skin and your breath hitches, stuck in your throat as he languidly peeks at you beneath his eyelashes with a heated gaze, then lowly confessing, “My name sounds best when you say it.”

Good heavens.

It’s difficult to swallow and keep your composure, especially when Teucer yells out in glee over, what you can assume, beating something in his game, and Childe drops your hand. But his dilated pupils don’t retract in the slightest, refusing to let you look away so that maybe, you can understand what he’s trying to convey to you. He’s taking the first step because he’s terrible and can’t contain his self-control anymore, pushing the ball into your court, ready for you to either play or exit into the sidelines.

When you do blink, there’s a vision of your naked body wrapped around another, limbs clinging desperately to a sturdy and panting frame. Lips, much like the ones that have seared themselves onto your knuckles, are at your neck and sucking, biting, before moving to your ear and laying filthy words into them that drive you closer to the edge. It all happens so fast that you feel you’ve just experienced whiplash, yet also feeling secondhand embarrassment at how lewd some of these thoughts have been.

You can’t stay here any longer.

“I-I have to go,” spills off your tongue before you can really think about it. The way the haze shatters in his eyes is heartbreaking in its own way, but there’s no time for you to explain. Your brain is in overdrive and eager to run, run, run. It detects danger on all fronts, but you muster out a, “H-have a good break, come find me next semester, mmk?”

And you’re out the door with inhuman speed. When the door clicks shut, only then does Teucer look up from his screen and frown at the lack of your presence. “Where’d they go?”

Chlide doesn’t seem to hear him, and Teucer has never seen his big brother look so sad and confused before.

-

He holds on to that last tendril of hope, because mark his words, he will find you come January.

-

After about a week at home, enjoying the festive time with his family and mildly unconcerned about next year’s courses because that was a problem for another day, Childe has his first, crazy, nonsensical dream.

At least, that’s what he tells himself when he snaps awake and his body aches with exhaustion. Not only are his joints in agony, he also feels like he’s sporting unforeseen bruises, which makes absolutely no sense because he hasn’t done anything that would warrant them, no matter how much he and his brothers do some rough-housing. His night of sleep was all consumed by flashes and scenes of weapon fighting, lucid enough to remember feeling his arms flex and wield bows and double-headed polearms and being cognizant of all the enemies??? surrounding him. They ranged from deranged looking monsters, floating beings with soulless masks, and large humans in electricity-padded armor, to behemoth machines in the sky that could leave you within an inch of your life thanks to a drill for a hand?!

But what’s even worse is that you seem to have managed a deal with Morpheus himself and infiltrated his dreams. You were there, too, sometimes fighting with him, sometimes against him, much to his dismay, and while it was nice, he just didn’t get it. Why the friendliness and hostility? Why was there an anger that overtook him when looking directly at you, parrying your blade and sending harmful arcs of water toward your figure?

Why did he relish the fear in your eyes when he darted towards you with electricity cracking through the air?

There’s an overwhelming sensation now to grab his phone to text you and apologize -- for what, he can’t fathom and there are no words to accurately convey what he’s thinking. “Hey, sorry for wanting to kill you in my dream :( “? Or “Sorry for being a friend but then stabbing you in the back, but then being nice to you again”?

And the only thing that really made sense was the serenity and contentment that would course through his veins as the two of you danced around on ivory sandy beaches, picking up shiny blue starconches and taking down more weird creatures; the breathlessness when you would fall back into the water and re-emerge to reconfirm his beliefs that you were one of the most beautiful humans he’d ever laid his eyes on; the love--

Hold the fuck up.

He doesn’t love you. He likes you a whole lot and he’s severely and deathly attracted to you, but he doesn’t love you. Your existence has only been made known to him for about two months, and he didn’t really start talking to you until three weeks in. So no matter how comfortable he feels with you, no matter how much he wishes that you were sleeping peacefully next to him so his nights wouldn’t feel so lonely, it was too early, too hasty, to say that he loves you.

“I’ve been wondering, why didn’t you bring them home?” His mother asks him out of nowhere during breakfast, all to add to this extremely tumultuous roller-coaster morning he’s been having. All he wants to do is eat his bowl of milk and cereal, then potentially go back to sleep before fulfilling his promise to go with his siblings to the nearby skating rink. It takes everything in him to not choke on his spoon of grains.

“Agreed, didn’t you mention they didn’t really have any family to go back to and that the move to Liyue was semi-permanent?” His father chimes in, laying a quick peck on his wife’s temple. “It’s never fun to spend the holidays alone.”

“They would’ve felt like they were intruding,” Childe replies quietly, stabbing his bowl a few times before scooping up another spoonful of cereal to his mouth. “I know we’re friends, but we haven’t known each other for that long, and maybe they’d be uncomfortable because that’s a lot honestly…”

“You don’t know until you try,” his mother sings and pats him on the shoulder. “We do have a guest room after all.”

“For them and their twin?”

“And quite a comfortable futon with enough blankets.”

Childe smiles fondly at his parents’ kindness. He can only imagine what this winter break would’ve been like now -- you and your twin floating around, trying to help out with certain chores, sitting by the fireplace and watching TV, huddled up with mugs of hot chocolate, playing board games with everyone and engaging in all the shenanigans…

Laughing. Loving. Grinning. Basking.

Handing over one of his hoodies to you as a sick way of torturing yet blessing himself for seeing how lovely you look in his clothes, standing silently in the doorway as you attempt to help out with mealtimes next to his mother, watching you run around in the backyard and dodging his siblings’ snowballs while lodging a few of your own -- how wonderful it all would be.

But he squashes it down as quickly as possible, because you escaped his grasp. You ran away from his advances temporarily and even though you gave him permission to seek you out come the spring semester, he worries that you might take it back. Something will wake up inside of you to keep him out of your heart and your life, and he’s not confident enough at this point to believe there’s a good chance you will come spend the holidays with him and his family next year.

“Maybe next year, ma,” he sends her a hesitant, yet somewhat broken purse of his lips that’s just the least bit curved. It tells her everything he’s thinking, and the quick patting of his cheek lets him know she understands.

Half an hour later, Childe finds himself curled up on his side under the sheets, phone in hand as he stares at a blinking cursor. It shouldn’t be so hard to send a text to convey his holiday greetings, because that’s all it is -- part of him is becoming desperate and aching for some interaction with you, even if it’s just a text sent back for conventional social pleasantries. He’ll take it for now, right?

Before he can totally chicken out, his thumbs quickly type a, “Happy Holidays, (y/n) :)”, and it’s a little embarrassing how quickly after he hits the ‘send’ button that he tosses it over his shoulder so he’s not directly looking at it anymore. His heartbeat is too quick and he prays for no phantom vibrations or phantom sound notifications to avoid any disappointment of thinking he got a reply. It was a harmless text, yet he’s treating it like he just got assigned on a mission to go and murder someone for the first time. What will he do if you never text him back? Does that mean you really don’t want to talk to him? Are you dead in a ditch somewhere? Did you change numbers and not tell him? Did your twin get all the details and make the executive decision to block his number? Will he never get a chance to talk to you again, even if it’s about something in the Teyvat Mythology class next semester? Will you--

His shoulder screams in protest when he quickly flips himself over at the text notification sound, hands shakily unlocking his phone and opening up your conversation again. His heart rate significantly decreases, reaching back to its normal pace, especially as he reads the little words on his screen.

“Happy Holidays, Ajax ^^”

There is hope.

-

“You’re thinking about him, aren’t you?”

You’re huddled under the comforter of your twin’s bed, phone just peeking above the edge as you stare at it with a brightness in your eyes. For the most part, you had been sulking there, apart from meals and going back to your own room to sleep, and mentally berating yourself for the way you reacted to Childe the week before.

“He just texted me to say happy holidays,” shrugging to put on a facade of indifference. It’s stupid that you’re trying to hide your feelings from your twin of all people, who could pick apart and identify your emotions in a heartbeat. A roll of his eyes lets you know that you haven’t fooled him at all.

“So you think that whatever comment he made, which was very suggestive and indicative of clearly non-platonic feelings, was just something...friendly? Remind me again how you came to that conclusion?”

“I don’t know what I was thinking!” You whine, looking around to see if there was anything you could toss at him. “It’s just, with everything, all the dreams and stupid gut feelings, I just -- I don’t know, okay?? I can’t tell you enough how much I wish I had just kissed his stupid face and see where it goes from there.”

“Okay, gross, but don’t beat yourself up. Though...I do have a good idea on how to maybe get a good reaction out of him. You wanna go to the New Years’ celebration at Xiangling’s?”

“I think she’d threaten me with a knife if I didn’t. She wanted to go shopping at some point, too.”

“I’ll drop the overprotective brother act for one night, okay? One night, just to let this happen, and for your peace of mind.”

He does a fair amount of conspiring with Xiangling, a friend they met one time at a restaurant a couple years ago, even tagging along on the shopping trip. Together, the three of you find yourself a dress that Xiangling swears would make any person drool over you, including Childe, because at the end of the day, he was a person with the possibility of being attracted to you.

You think it’s a bit silly, but honestly, what do you have to lose at this point?

-

At 11:57PM on New Years’ Eve, Childe is standing outside in the freezing cold with his family, arms lifting up bags of sparklers and fireworks. They’ve driven out closer to the wild like they do every year, and everybody excitedly gets lighters ready, making sure someone’s got a clock out there that tells the seconds. As the younger kids open up the packaging and argue over which one to set off first, Childe’s phone vibrates in his coat pocket.

It’s 11:58PM when he manages to fish the device out and thank himself for buying gloves that are touch-screen friendly, excited to see that there are two texts from you, the latter reading, “Happy New Year!”. It doesn’t matter that you’re a little early, but he’s mainly intrigued by the fact a photo came before it. In his mind, you’re probably curled up with your twin brother, hopefully a selfie because wow, he misses your face.

He gets something else instead, and he is so glad that it’s dark outside and the electric lamp they have is too far away from him to draw any attention.

You have your arm around your brother’s waist and another girl’s that he doesn’t recognize, but it’s a full frontal view of your outfit, one that hugs your curves beautifully and shows more cleavage than he’s ever seen from you, sophisticated and elegant, yet fun and leaving enough to the imagination. There’s a bright smile coming from all of you, and you look like you’re at someone’s house or apartment with plenty of other people milling around in the back, but they don’t matter, not when all he can focus on is you.

Gorgeous, breathtaking, arousing, mind blowing, and gods, he wishes he could teleport to Liyue at this moment, find you, and kiss you right at midnight. Fuck the fact that he doesn’t exactly believe in superstitions like, “Kissing your significant other at midnight means you’ll last forever!” but he’s willing to take the chance with it on this night and the ones after, if he’s allowed. He tries not to think too much about pinning you against the wall and letting the world dissolve -- wants to be the one with the privilege to drag down that zipper and feel his bare skin on yours, and --

As Teucer starts yelling there’s only a minute left, he instinctively locks his phone and shoves it away out of anyone’s view. The last thing he needs is his family teasing him about ogling at your photo for a straight 50 seconds, wide-eyed and pupils on the verge of dilating, the visible breath leaving his mouth just a smudge more dense and prominent than usual.

The only thing he can do to distract himself from popping a boner in front of his parents is to join in on the countdown, making sure all the fireworks are set up correctly and grabbing a sparkler for himself. He waves it around with Tonia and promises to fulfill her wishes of taking one of those pictures right as she draws a pattern in the air. Their excitement is palpable and addicting, and even though the larger fireworks set off a few seconds after midnight hits, the nostalgia fills his lungs with fond memories and future wishes that they only continue this tradition for as long as possible, and hopefully, with you at his side.

-

When it’s 12:04AM, you get a picture message back of Childe bundled up in a black paletot coat, matching beanie and all, a gloved hand holding a sparkler and lips curved upwards, with a caption that says, “Happy New Year’s! See you soon :)”. You show it to Xiangling and your brother, both taking it as a win in their books, although the former does tipsily protest that there should be a better indicator of Childe’s brain breaking at how amazing you look right now. Maybe she’s prophetic, because another text chimes in and the words set you aflame, as well as suggestive whoops into your ears.

It’s a simple, “You look incredible btw”.

If you didn’t want to properly savor this moment, you would’ve found the nearest shot of the strongest liquor and tossed it back with abandon. But you want to remember the warmth in your veins that wasn’t from the alcohol or the heating, the fluttering of your heartbeat, the teeth-baring grin that you couldn’t fight off, the constant re-reading of those four words -- because they’re so different from everything you had been feeling before with him, the need for protection, the need to escape. Instead, you’d like to be in his arms right now and see for yourself how he’d look at you in this moment, and if he would take any action.

You want him to. So, so bad.

-

Childe spends his last week at home hating the fact that you’re just sitting around somewhere in Liyue, doing whatever you’re doing, probably doing some light preparation for your last semester of classes, and he’s not there to take advantage of all this free time and hang out with you. When classes start, it’ll be busy and hectic. You still have your thesis to finish and revise, and while that won’t eat up all your time, it’s still some that he’d want to fill in with his presence if he could. He debates whether or not he should ask for your schedule and compare it with his, maybe set up meetings every other day or propose that they all eat one meal together every day. Childe’s not quite sure of what you plan to do after graduation, as it hasn’t come up in conversation yet, but either way, he’s determined to stay in contact and make things work out. Long distance isn’t ideal, but with technology now, he’ll take it.

He feels a little bad for how excited he probably looked to be leaving home, uncharacteristic for the most part. His older siblings have already gone back to their respective homes, and it’s mainly Teucer and Tonia that worry and tear up when he starts packing his belongings. Tonia finds it unfair that Teucer got to meet you first and the latter makes sure to rub it into everyone’s faces. It’s hard for Childe to sleep on the plane because he’s thrumming with excitement, yet somehow even more nervous than usual when the plane hits small bouts of turbulence, and he doesn’t seem to relax until he sets foot back on campus.

He’s here. It’s January, and you’re physically closer to him than ever in the last two weeks.

-

“Found you.”

On the first day of classes, you’re sitting alone with some salad greens in a bowl, poking your fork at some scraps while you watch something on your phone, earbuds in and back towards the entrance of the canteen. It would explain the unannounced entrance of the very person who’s been at the forefront of nearly every thought in the last 96 hours, his fingers gingerly removing an earbud to surprise you as best as possible, and you startle in your seat.

Your heart kicks into overdrive when he hands you back your earbud and pulls out the seat next to you, setting his own plate of food down as he plops down in his chair. But then he says nothing afterwards, instead choosing to send you a cheeky grin before digging in. You’re left to slowly phase out of your state of shock, stuck between either running away or frantically texting your twin to come and save you even though he was off on a date with Keqing.

It’s not that you weren’t elated at the fact that Childe had done exactly as you told him last month, you just weren’t...prepared? It’s a shitty excuse and a cop out -- you’re mainly just having trouble with racking your brain to find the right words. What are you supposed to say? What should you do? Is it socially acceptable to lean over and kiss him on the cheek because that’s what you’d like to impulsively do at this very second??

“So you did,” you settle and steal a roasted potato wedge from his plate. It’s his turn to be taken by surprise, but he gets over it much quicker than you do. In fact, he spears two wedges and drops them in your bowl, smiling at you as best as he can with a mouth full of food. You give them your thanks before the silence settles in again.

“Did you have a good break?” He asks before his next bite.

“I did. You?”

“It was nice. My parents said I should’ve brought you and your twin home to spend the holidays with us. Can’t say it didn’t cross my mind before finals.”

Holy shit, what? “We couldn’t intrude like that, but that’s really nice of you guys.”

“That’s okay, there’s plenty of chances to visit later.”

You tilt your head and furrow your eyebrows. “But we graduate this semester?”

Childe challenges you with one of his own eyebrows raised. “And? Are we never gonna see each other again?”

Honestly, the possibility had occurred to you. You aren’t entirely sure of Childe’s plans after graduation, and if that meant he was staying in Liyue or going back to Snezhnaya or even moving to Inazuma or Mondstat. While people preach on and on about how lasting friendships and relationships are often formed during college, you believe it’s more common to slowly drift apart as life gets busier. And if Childe moved away, or if you did, it’d be hard to consistently keep in touch with 10 hour workdays.

The thought saddens you, regardless. You like him so much and you’re glad that he was even in your life to begin with, because as unbelievable as it sounds, seeing him was almost akin to the feeling of coming home. Amidst all your nerves, your confusion, your spiraling thoughts, something deeply sated in your heart was a comfort that you found with very few people in your life whenever in his presence.

The thought of leaving and never looking back somehow doesn’t feel new -- it’s bittersweet, but the air in your lungs feels like it’s surrendered to something, like it was to be expected.

“You can’t just leave without telling me--”

“It was last minute! I had no choice!”

“You could’ve written up a message, anything--”

“Can you imagine the position you’d be in if the message got intercepted? I wouldn’t have been safe, she’d make you come after me--”

“As if you’d be any safer in Inazuma of all places! That’s the one place I can’t easily get to!”

“I can take care of myself, Childe, I don’t need you to protect me.”

“This isn’t about me protecting you, (y/n) and -- stop walking, will you?!”

“Then what is this about?” You spin on your wheel with eyes aflame. “Why are you so angry with me? It’s normal for me to disappear for weeks at a time, why was this any different?”

“Because you could’ve died!” He yells back in despair, chest heaving. Your silence is his cue to continue. “You could’ve died and I wouldn’t have known until much later. You could’ve died and all I’d ever think about were the things I never got to say to you, and how I wish I had treated every day with you like it was our last.”

It isn’t hard to tell that you’re stunned and at a complete loss for words. Childe often hides behind facades of charm and wit, and only when he is truly weak does he choose to be this vulnerable, baring his heart for you to see.

“I only have two nightmares in this world. One, my family being harmed in any way. Two, reading in a report or hearing from an agent that you’ve been captured and killed.”

“I like to think that we will.”

His hand reaches out to lay on top of yours, giving it a quick squeeze. “Well, let’s make the most of it this semester.”

Conversation afterwards is easy, filling each other in on holiday activities. Childe speaks extensively about several family traditions and you listen with rapt attention, basking in how fond he is of all of them. Even as you both bring your dishes to the return belt and leave, he immediately offers to drive you both somewhere to get boba, noticing your reluctance to part ways. But boba shops have to close, and you both have class tomorrow morning, and you’re both finding any excuse to keep talking, even if that means sitting outside your dorm building on a nearby bench.

You eventually bid each other good night’s and see you later’s, him refusing to walk away until the heavy door locks shut behind you after you swipe your student ID, and you looking over your shoulder to watch his figure disappear into the night.

-

True to his intentions, Childe makes great efforts to meet you at least once a day, and he can’t get enough. Each parting from you tugs and tugs at his heart, as if there’s a high possibility you’ll never want to see him again the next day, and he wouldn’t know what to do with himself. Your twin and Childe get along well for the most part, and he even meets Xiangling on one of her shifts at her regular restaurant, who sends you a salacious wink and an eyebrow wiggle over his shoulder that nearly causes you to burst from embarrassment.

February rolls over without a hitch, even if you’re a little disappointed that Childe didn’t make a move for Valentine’s Day. Granted, you two still spent time with each other and he’s so darn physically affectionate and he bought you a carnation from the event his dorm held, but you wish you had the guts to fess up and just kiss the man.

It’ll happen some day, you tell yourself. You have time before graduation.

Two days before the end of the Friday that would signal the start of Spring Break, you wake up in a cold sweat, mind reeling and head splitting, heart so so heavy, as a connection is made between your present and your dreams. Not long after, there are tears streaming silently down your face and into your open palms placed in your lap, and you sit in shock as everything comes back to you. Memories are such treasured burdens, you realize.

For the most part, you had gotten used to the dreams, choosing to take charge of what you know and feel now with Childe over succumbing to some strange neurological premonitions. Especially in your dreams when many people’s faces were blurred over and hazy, and the only things you could rely on were voices, touch, and other physical features. You thought that maybe your mind was just playing tricks by transposing Childe’s hair onto a body that was also strikingly similar to his, but for the first time last night, you could see each defining feature on his face as clear as day.

The sight of his figure arching gracefully over yours, the water arrows that appeared out of thin air, the back that protected you from some military men, the voice that said, “Hey girlie, hold still.”

And that was when you had snapped awake to your current state.

Past the initial shock and uncontrollable tears, you soon bent over as sobs wracked your chest, overwhelmed by all the emotions and the pain the memories brought you; losing your twin, finding him to only be left with even more questions after roaming for decades and decades, meeting all your loved ones throughout Mondstat and Liyue, fighting yet falling so hard for Childe, feeling the fear when facing his Foul Legacy form, hating him for Osial, loving him, breathing heavily as the tip of your blade was pointed at his neck and his own just centimeters from yours, tendrils of water inching closer and closer--

Everything makes sense now.

When you meet your twin for lunch at the cafeteria, you pay no mind to the fact that you’re in public and hug him harder than you ever have in years. He’s already a little alarmed that your eyes seem swollen and you look like finals came two months early, but when he asks what’s wrong, all he gets is a shake of your head and nothing more than, “Just a bad nightmare. I love you, y’know that?”

“I love you too?”

“Don’t sound so unsure, now let’s go and get in line before they run out of Jueyun Chili Chicken.”

Even when you meet Xiao later in the early evening to talk about your thesis, you find yourself holding back more tears just two minutes in, reminded of his past and his own life, and he’s moderately concerned, hesitantly handing you a tissue from the corner of his desk when a stray tear escapes. “Is everything okay?” He hesitantly asks, really hoping that he didn’t do anything to make you cry.

“No,” you almost wail and sniffle while dabbing at your eyes. “Sorry, it’s just been a really long day.”

Xiao’s inquisitive gaze softens, remembering how hard undergraduate life could be sometimes. Graduate school was a whole other level, but that shouldn’t discount your own personal difficulties. Plus, in all of the year and a half that he’s known you, you’ve never broken down like this before in front of him.

“You work really hard, Xiao,” you continue, and he’s not sure where this is coming from. “You’re always so helpful and willing to work with me and answer my stupid questions and like-- you practice self-care, right?”

Xiao nods as a white lie, but it seems to comfort you. Maybe too much because you pull him in for a quick and unexpected hug, and you both decide to reschedule this meeting for tomorrow.

As per usual, you wait for Childe to join you for dinner since you finished up earlier than expected. It gives you more time to think about everyone from Mondstat -- Kaeya, Diluc, Lisa, Jean, Amber...funny to think that some things never changed as you compared their past version to the ones you know now.

“Mora for your thoughts?”

There’s a peace that warms your heart when you hear Childe’s voice, one that forces you to smile at him as he sits down next to you. “Just thinking about old friends.”

“I have to admit, I’ll be a little jealous if it’s another guy taking up more space than me in that pretty brain of yours.”

What a flirt. This man isn’t good for your heart. “Who said you had any to begin with?”

He dramatically places a hand over his heart. “You wound me, (y/n). How will I ever recover?”

“You’re ridiculous,” you snicker. Childe reaches over to pinch your cheek and you bat at him in protest. Easily, he grabs one of your hands and simply pulls you towards the food lines, knowing that you’ll stop fighting back soon.

Part of it feels strange now to feel and see his hands with no leather gloves on.

“Childe,” you start halfway through your meal, continuing after he hums back in reply. “Do you believe in reincarnation?”

He freezes briefly, but recovers so quickly that if you hadn’t been watching so closely, you wouldn’t have noticed. “I think it’s neat, the idea of having past lives. Why do you ask?”

What he really wants to ask is if you’ve been having those dreams, too; if he’s starring in your nights like you have been in his.

“Just a thought, especially since you’re taking Teyvat Myth now, too.”

“Do you...do you think if there was a past life, that we knew each other?”

There’s something about the look of content on your face before you meet his gaze -- he thinks that you know more than you’re letting on but you’re holding back for some reason. He wants to know what’s going through your brain right now, why the fondness in your eyes sends a jolt through him like he’s been searching for it all his life, if you know anything about this magnetic pull between you two.

“I like to think that we knew each other well.”

-

Even though the first day of your returned memories was somewhat eventful, you couldn’t help but feel yourself wanting to pull back from Childe -- at least, until you can successfully compartmentalize which emotions belonged to you past self and which ones belonged to your current mindset. You didn’t quite agree with his duties and his affiliation with the Fatui back then, even if he had his reasons that did make sense, to some degree.

The killing, the threatening, so intent on stealing Rex Lapis’s Gnosis in the name of the Tsaritsa, summoning Osial as a mean to an end -- and you definitely can’t forget how stubborn he was in not listening to your protests, so caught up in his brain that you had betrayed him and sent you plummeting to a near-death experience despite his earlier promise of no intention of killing you specifically.

Everything had been toeing a faint, thin line with Childe then. Undeniable chemistry and tension, guarding yourself for yours and Paimon’s safety, slashing at Fatui agents, whispering out pleas and affirmations of “I’m yours” while riding him, sometimes having to sneak out in the mornings…

The only thing you don’t remember is how everything ends -- maybe it’ll come back to you eventually, but for now, you think you’re okay not knowing.

If Childe still doesn’t remember anything from back then, you think it’d be unfair to spend time with him in all your conflicting emotions, even when it’s spring break, where you have so much more hours in the day to be with each other than normal. Fun plans around Liyue had been made, like a two-day one-night trip to Yaoguang Shoal, and you’re this close to cancelling on him.

But he had been looking forward to it so much, even made most of the preparations for it. Who are you to rob that joy from him when it was you who couldn’t figure out your own shit? Are you self-destructing?

Perhaps.

Before you know it, you’re sitting in the passenger seat of his car, staring out the window at the scenery. Somehow, it pleased you to see that the nature of Liyue had been carefully preserved over the many centuries despite its development into the modern age. You get lost in picking apart the differences between then and now that you don’t notice how quiet you’ve fallen and Childe looks over worriedly when you show no reaction to your favorite songs playing on the stereo.

Even when he calls your name once, twice, nothing gives as you clearly have tuned everything out. So he leaves you be until there’s about half an hour left on the drive, unable to hold back and succumbing to reach over for your hand. You startle so strongly that he almost feels bad for having done it unannounced. But what’s even more disturbing is that this isn’t really the first time.

You’ve been talking to him less, often sitting quietly and staring off into another world that he can’t seem to reach. His texts are answered less frequently and with less wit and enthusiasm, so much so that he just appreciates you still show up to see him. Each time he asks if you’re okay, you always affirm that you are. He’s had a hard time believing you, but Childe believes you’ll tell him when you’re ready, surely.

It’s a little ironic yet fateful that Childe planned to bring you here, of all places. In the past, you had spent many days and nights running around in the sand with him, fighting slimes and hilichurls and collecting starconches for him. You remember laying on a large towel next to him as you both looked up into the sky, pointing out stars and constellations while sharing endless kisses away from prying, spying eyes.

“I’m sorry, I must’ve zoned out,” you sincerely apologize.

“It’s okay, I just wanna make sure you relax while we’re here. This is supposed to be a vacation.”

“You’re right,” you agree and squeeze his hand. “Let’s make the most of it before we become adults who are too busy to have fun like this again.”

And you do. Childe rented a small beach cabin (rich boys) closer to one end of the shoreline, just big enough with two bedrooms, a bathroom, and a small kitchen with a dining table. You help him bring in your bags and some groceries bought the night before, setting them down quickly so you can peer out the window again to take in the view. Childe picked a good time, too. Although it’d be a little chilly at night, the day was still warm and mainly overcast with clouds.

“What do you say we change into our swimsuits and head down to the water?”

“Sure.”

Childe hadn’t really been expecting for you to step out in a large, casual tee and gym shorts, one shoulder exposed. He might have been hoping to see a little more skin, but his mother didn’t raise a chauvinistic pervert for a son.

The light in your eyes as you both approach the water is everything he had been missing the last few days, your excitement and joy contagious. As soon as you place everything down on the sand, you kick off your flip flops and leave him behind to step into the water, giggling at feeling the waves crash over your ankles and bring sand between your toes. Childe approaches you from behind and starts smearing sunblock on the back of your neck, to which you just grin beautifully at him in thanks and he has to fight off the desire to kiss you right then and there.

You’re too caught up in embracing the ocean afterwards to feel the shrinking distance between you two, mistaking his warmth for the general spring air. It isn’t until he’s done with your shoulders that he hands you the bottle to leave you to do the rest of your body, and when you turn to thank him, he’s much closer than you remember. His eyes are gentle, holding your gaze and almost daring you to look away first.

But if there’s one thing you can place without a shred of doubt, it is the unmistakable look of love, because you had seen it many, many times before without knowing until later what it meant.

How so incredibly lucky you were to have Childe back in your life now, loving you all the same, and with no life-threatening barriers. Fate or the Archons have given you a second chance, and you’d be damned to take it for granted.

Childe welcomes your lips against his, wasting no time to bring you into his arms so you’re pressed against him as much as possible. He can’t care for the overt public display of affection because this is everything he’s wanted for months now, waiting patiently for you to give him permission to make you his. Your lips are incredibly soft and pliant against his as you first kiss him patiently, then applying more force and desperation to taste more of him. He mirrors you, one hand cradling the back of your head and the other on your neck with a thumb extended to your jawline, teeth moving to nip at your bottom lip. It’s dangerous, the way you smile against his lips, and when he sinks his teeth in deeper before pulling back, your quiet mewl nearly drives him over the edge.

But you’re in public, and this was an amazing first kiss. You two have a beach to enjoy and a fun night planned, and now that he doesn’t have to hold back on his affections, it’ll be even better.

His lips part from yours regretfully, his eyes languidly opening to meet yours. Out of the corner of his eye, he spots a blue starconch in the sand and freezes.

It’s not that he’s never seen one before, but something clicks. You. The shore. Starconches. Starry nights. His dreams. Monsters. Gods. Fighting. So much fighting. Training. His family. Dragons. You. Falling. You falling. You fighting him. Yelling. Kissing. Loving. Chasing. Him chasing you before you disappear at a teleport waypoint that somehow you only can operate. The abyss. Your twin.

Oh, Archons.

“ -ou okay, Ajax? Ajax?”

He snaps to look at you again. How does he go about this? How does he ask?

“(Y/n)...have you ever heard of the Fatui Harbingers?”

He has to admit that it’s a bit amazing to be able to identify all the emotions that cross your complexion, from curiosity to realization to conflicted. You’re actively trying to piece everything together without revealing too much on the off-chance that you’re wrong, that Childe hasn’t regained his memories and is just asking about something from class randomly and completely out of the blue.

Wait.

“You haven’t reached that material yet in class,” you whisper, heart in your throat at the realization. Could it really be…

“I was once Tartaglia, eleventh Harbinger of the Fatui, who possessed a Delusion and used my Foul Legacy Transformation with you several times,” he murmurs back, tucking a stray tendril behind your ear. “Is it too late to apologize again for summoning an ancient god and letting you fall about five floors with no warning?”

He should’ve been prepared for you wrapping your arms around his neck, pulling him in for a tight embrace. “No, never, but I spent weeks after kicking your ass so you’ve been long forgiven.”

Childe burrows his face into your neck, breathing in your scent and basking in this moment. There was so much to talk about, but you two arguably had more time in the world than ever with nothing holding you back. There was no impending war looming over, no one on the run, no opposing forces. His silent wish for a different life with you seems to have been answered finally. If running into you had been the event to set everything in motion, he only wishes he’d done so earlier.

All that matters now is you’re here together in this plane of existence, given a chance to love again, and experience everything you couldn't before.

As written in the stars, take my soul for it is forever yours.

fin

[korasonata]

I had someone last time ask me about time stamps, so all of these from this point out will have the time stamp at the top of each set of quotes. I am currently in the process of retrieving the time stamps for the previous 5 posts, and will link an updated version when I have retrieved them all.

Link to the video is here: https://m.twitch.tv/videos/1149389841

Favourite moments of Joe and Cleo model streams part 6!

(I am very sorry I tried very hard to make this not as long as it is. There will probably be another extended cut post because there was just SO much happening in this stream)

—

00:00:57

Cleo: Welcome to the stream. Mine and/or Joes. Or, both.

Joe: Yay!

Cleo: I suppose that’s what the “and” means. In that statement. That would make sense. Glue pot’s ready—

Joe: It makes sense to me.

Cleo: …that makes me even more nervous that it makes sense to you, Joe. Not gonna lie.

—

00:16:34

Joe: So, anyway, last night at dinner, uh, like I— I had put this interview on while I was cooking and I kinda left it on as my daughter sat down for dinner and I was like “hey, this is an interview with this very famous journalist from about 50 years ago. Uh, he’s got a really interesting voice and a really interesting cadence, and I wanna kind of listen to it so I can— maybe copy it as like a joke in one of my videos.” And my daughter listens to it for about a— a minute—

Cleo: And then says “now that’s— is that you?”

Joe: *laughing* She just turns to me and she’s like “my friend…her parents got her…did you know they make crayon applesauce now? It says crayola. It tastes. Like they’ve blended a brown crayon. And sprinkled it on top.”

Cleo: That sounds grim.

Joe (prideful laughing): And it just kind of matches the cadence while also talking about something terrible to ingest?*laughing* And I just start cracking up because like— *laughing continues* she gets it! And she’s just like “why are you laughing?” Because you just— you nailed it! You nailed the pauses, you— you nailed the subject matter, like this is— this is just great!! And she’s like “no! This is a real thing! This crayon applesauce is terrible!” And I’m just laughing and laughing and she’s like trying to explain why it’s not good, and I’m like “I understand why it’s not good, but—“

Cleo (reading chat): “Joe’s daughter is awesome.” I think you’re probably correct. Joe’s daughter is indeed awesome.

Joe: Yeah, I’m very very happy with my daughter. (Reading chat) What was for dinner? Well not crayola applesauce!

—

Cleo (in response to someone complimenting her 3rd Life videos): Awe! Thank you joytobake, that’s really nice! I am…always pleased when people like my personality. Because I’m never sure that people should, you know?

Joe: Yeah, that’s— that’s what we were talking about— I think before we started streaming, was like, Cleo really gets me, and that’s a huge red flag.

Cleo: That’s a— yeah. As a human being. Understanding Joe - massive red flag. Huge. This is a danger. To everybody. And particularly Joe.

Joe: It’s the terror of being truly known.

—

00:47:08

Joe: Up until this point I didn’t show the instructions, but now I feel like I have to.

Cleo: Because otherwise people are going to judge your competency?

Joe: Yeah! They’re gonna go “ok. Any idiot can figure out how these pieces go together” but if you look at these instructions, that’s not true. I’m a spectacular idiot, and I have no idea what I’m doing with these.

Cleo: I mean. I want— I want to confirm. Yes. Spectacular.

Joe: Yes. Thank you Cleo.

Cleo: *snicker* You’re welcome Joe. I always like to insult the people I care about the most.

Joe (quietly): I know…I appreciate it.

Cleo (Watching chat): I’m waiting for Cam to confirm that.

(Cam in chat: She insults me SO MUCH, she called me a gibbon last night…)

—

00:59:42

Joe: *reading tips*

Cleo (reading chat): “you can’t stop Joe when he’s on a role.” This is true.

Joe (not paying attention): *still reading tips*

Cleo: I mean you can, you just have to go: Joe. Joe. JOE. And then he stops sometimes.

Joe (quietly, but with emphasis): WHAAAAAAAAAAT??!?

Cleo: I’M DOING A THING!

—

01:00:46

Joe (reading tips): “This is an encouragement donation for more of you singing in the future.” Ooo, I think Cleo would like that because the future is not now.

—

01:02:23

Cleo (genuine singing): Ground control to major Tom…

Joe: *listening in awe*

Cleo: …That’s…pretty much all I know…

Joe: Oh, I was gonna let you keep going, I— I wanted to hear more.

Cleo: Oh no. That’s pretty much all I know.

Joe: But yeah. Hypothermic haddoc writes (singing) “tell my wife I love her very much!” …I was waiting for you to jump in with the (singing) “she knoooooows!”

Cleo: Again. Again, I don’t know the song very well.

Joe: Oh. And here I am sitting in my tin can—

—

01:47:54

Cleo: *leaves to get a drink*

Joe: While you’re getting your drink I guess I’ll provide some musical entertainment.

SILENCE

Joe: …I don’t have anything prepared. So, let’s see…do we have any birthdays? *laughing* if it’s anybody’s birthday I’ll sing to you while Cleo’s gone.

Cleo: I’m back.

Joe: Oh ok. Well, sorry birthday boys. And girls.

Cleo: feel free to sing to people. I’m sure people want that.

Joe: no…well, I was gonna do it while you were away cause I need to get up and get my drink as soon as you’re back.

Cleo: Oh, go and get a drink and I will sing happy birthday—

Joe: So I’m gonna go get my drink, I’ll be right back.

Cleo: —to people who have chosen to spend their birthday…here…I’m not judging, uh, but— (upbeat singing) Happy Birthday to you! You smell like a zoo! (Talking) …uh, etcetera etcetera… (Singing) I forgot how this song goes! Nevermind it sucks to be you! *blows a raspberry*

—

01:49:09

Cleo: I mean it’s Cams birthday on Saturday, and I will sing to Cam on his birthday. His birthday is not today. I mean he probably wants me to not sing to him on his birthday, to be fair—

[Cam: Please don’t sing to me]

Cleo: —but you know, I might do it anyway. Cause it’s obnoxious. And I will laugh. (Reading chat) “Happy Birthday! Here’s some genocide! Please don’t sing to me…” *laughing* I won’t sing to you if you don’t want me to, Honey.

[Cam: Not happy birthday at least lol]

Cleo: I might torture you in other ways though.

—

01:50:55

Cleo: Hiiiiii Jooooooe.

Joe: Hello! Joe Hiws hewe! I am back fwom my dwink bweak!

Cleo: …what is that voice?

Joe (in a Kermit the Frog/Swedish Chef/Yoda hybrid of an accent): I feewl wike it’s fwom home star wunner or something, I don’t know! It’s almost Kermit THe Fwog Hewe, but not quITe!

*Cleo laughing*

It’s a little— (Normal voice) I dunno. I still had some of my drink in my throat, so I was like— I didn’t wanna like accidentally cough it out on the microphone as soon as I started talking. So I was just like (weird voice continues) I’ll do thIS vOIce

*Squealing giggling from Cleo*

(Same iteration of previous accent now blended somehow with the voice of Goofy from Micky Mouse) It’ll keep my mOUth in a shape that if I start— me coughing up a dwink it’ll just go into the chEEks on EIther sIde. It’s a natuwal, uh bARRier against, uh, hydration escapism! Uh yuh!!

Cleo: *giggles* Ok Joe. Ok.

Joe: *high pitched laughing* I don’t know Cleo! I’m just gonna keep making noises until people give me money! It’s jus— it’s how I pay rent.

Cleo: *laughing* Making noises until people give you— ahhhh…..

Joe: Yeah

Cleo: — actually…..yeah. Yeah. Yeah…Um (reading chat) “it’s drunk Kermit” *wheezing*

Joe (drunk Kermit The Frog voice): It’s 5:00 somewhere!

Cleo: *laughing* thanks for this. I needed— I needed this moment of— of— whatever this was.

—

01:53:54

Joe: So my daughter said the most Wednesday Adams thing to me the other day—

Cleo: Oh no

Joe: Except she didn’t do the deadpan delivery. She was very upbeat about this. So apparently “UP” has, on Dinsey+ a series of shorts about the old man and the dog. Right? And they’re called something like “a Dougs Life” cause Doug is the name of the dog

Cleo: yeah.

Joe: and she goes “oh! And it’s short! Like a dogs lifespan!”

SILENCE

Cleo: …Your…kid is very much your kid, you know that right?

Joe (proud dad): I know right?!

—

01:58:20

Cleo: I mean…you’d kill it at the Met Galla. Not gonna lie.

Joe (excited): Oh my god— I wanna get one of those Manuel suits that has like all the rhinestones and the flowers on it? Um, but, you know, like, those are very expensive.

Cleo: We live with what we can afford. Maybe someone can make you a Diamond encrusted suit that you can wear on camera. And have all the sparkles as green.

Joe (very excited): Oh my gosh— actually— so—

02:20:45

Joe: Meanwhile in my Discord everyone’s posting what they describe as “eye searingly beautiful” lime green wedding dresses. For my next wedding. Um—

Cleo: *snicker* is that what you’re wearing for your next wedding?

Joe: you know, honestly at this point I don’t wanna make any assumptions about anything.

Cleo: *cackling*

—

02:31:07

(This is context for the next one)

Cleo (reading chat): “some people have too much time on their hands” I mean, I personally would not drive 8 hours to see— um…

Joe: …me?

Cleo: I dunno, I might drive 8 hours to see you.

Joe: I offered to drive 8 hours to see you when you were coming to Disney and you said no, so I’m gonna assume that you would not drive 8 hours to see me.

Cleo: I mean, I— li— the key word there was “might”. I wou— I would have to have my mini frea— well I was freaked out at that point. When you offered, and and I was just like “oh god no.” Because, you know, social anxiety is a thing.

Joe: Mhm. I’ve heard of that.

Cleo: Yeah. And I do not do well particularly meeting people for the first time, even people I’ve known for a while. I go very very quiet and umm…I think it’s worse actually with people that I’ve known for a while? Um, online, um…because— cause my brain goes “well you’re gonna make a s—your, your— your going to do something and say something stupid. You going— they’re gonna hate you in real life” um…so, yeah. My brain absolutely freaked out at that moment.

—

02:34:12

Cleo: But, you know, like I say, I get hate mail on the regular, it’s fine. I mean part of that is daring to be a woman on the Internet, but only part. The other part is the fact that I’m also an awful human being. So, you know.

SILENCE

Cleo: …the silence isn’t doing— the silence doesn’t do you— do me any favours Joe.

Joe: Well, you know, I didn’t wanna talk over you when you’re sharing your insecurities.

Cleo: yeah….

Joe: That seems rude.

Cleo: I mean—

Joe: So I wanted to make sure you were done.

Cleo: no no no no, that’s fine. I’m always done Joe.

Joe: And nOW I can actually tell you how I really feel.

Cleo: No, please don’t. Not onl— no. That will— that will make me even more uncomfortable.

Joe (upbeat singing): The praise train is on its way!! Choo choo!!

Cleo: Noooooooooooooooooo!! Nooo!!

Joe: For Cleo it’s her day!! Choo choo!!

Cleo: *noises of distress*

Joe: Cleo is really great!! Choo choo!! Choo choo!!

Cleo: *distressful crying*

Joe: She’s not merely ok!! She doesn’t have to be the best at talking to people for the first time!! Cause they’ll love her anyway!! And sometimes they’ll even rhyyyme!! Yay for Cleo!!

Cleo: *physically going through a full body cringe* noooo

Joe: See, it would have been rude if I did that in the middle of your thing.

Cleo: *sob laughing*

Joe: That would not have been socially acceptable.

Cleo (through tears): I’m not even sure it was socially acceptable now.

Joe: WHY NOT?!

Cleo: (sobbing and laughing simultaneously) I hate you so much.

—

02:38:05

Cleo (reading chat): “We all need a Joe in our life, who sings a theme song for us when we’re talking ourselves down” I’m not sure you do.

Joe: Yeah, that wasn’t really a theme song? Like, if I was gonna do a theme song for Cleo—

Cleo (with immense dread): Oh no…no…no…

—

02:43:07

Joe: I’d just like to point out (very obnoxiously high pitched voice) That this is Cleo’s average person voice, which means that 50% of people have an even higher pitched voice!

Cleo: …You know, I can’t actually stab Joe through the Internet. And I’ve always been upset about that.

—

02:53:36

Joe (with all the enthusiasm of a 16 year old girl gossiping at a slumber party): Ooo I wanna ask Cleo about giiiiiirls!!!

Cleo: Ask me about girls! I’m— I’m happy for you to ask me about girls.

Joe: Ok, so, do you— do you feel comfortable saying what your specific, uh, type of woman is? I’m— I’m curious about that.

Cleo: Um, it’s— it’s nerdy girls? Specifically. Umm…not too, um…you know, the kind of running, climbing, you know— sort of— person. You know, it’s— it’s the sort of— it’s the sort of— action girl kinda thing. I kinda like that type. That’s sort of my type.

Joe: Mhm. Yeah, like—

Cleo: Why, what’s your type of girl?

Joe: Well, uh, usually it’s somebody that is— very anti authority— un— un— dissatisfied with the status quo. So usually more punk, or that sort of thing.

Cleo: Yeah. That’s— that’s— that sort of plays into the action girl sort of thing as well. Yeah I get that. So yeah.

Joe: yeah, umm, you— yeah so I don’t know. Um— so not necessarily, uh, as focused on the athleticism element there, but I know like—

Cleo: Well it’s not really athleticism, it’s— it’s more— it’s more—

Joe: —in terms of like, um, hiking, cause like, uh, you know in college there’s like a climbing and camping club or whatever—

Cleo: Oh yeah, it’s not that sort of person. It’s— it’s more, um…getting out and having a go at things. Like, you know, not— not being afraid to—

Joe: Adventurous

Cleo: Yeah! Adventurous! That’s the word!

—

Cleo (whispering): I don’t know where this bit goes! *gasp* it goes over there!

Joe (whispering): You can do it!

Cleo: I can do it! I believe in me!

Joe: You’ll find a place to glue it! It doesn’t necessarily have to be the right place!

Cleo: I know!

Joe: You’re equally valid regardless!

Cleo: Thanks Joe!

Joe: You’re welcome!

Cleo: It’s appreciated!

[ruby-whistler]

The Prison Arc - a Complete Recap

[ /dsmp /rp - All of the people mentioned in this post are the characters, not the content creators behind them. TWs for mentions of fictional murder, abuse, torture, self-harm, and other canon-typical themes. ]

Watch the cut-down version of this recap here! The video doesn’t have all the details, but is well-edited and easier to watch.

Starting where we left off, after the Disc War finale, Dream reveals the last trick up his sleeve, the revival book. Seeing him as an active danger to the server, the people need a way to get rid of him in order to keep themselves and each other safe, but instead of killing him, they store him away for later use, also making the prison a Vault in a literal sense.

This is where the story of the prison seemingly begins, but - let’s rewind for a moment, because any and all information here is vital. What do we know about the prison? It was commissioned for 64 diamond blocks by Dream to be built by Awesamdude a day after Tommy was exiled. The prison was supposed to be inescapable, and hold a highly capable individual, yet allow visitors.

Getting back to the lore, a day after Dream arrives in the prison, Tommy goes to visit him. During this visit, Dream states that there is nothing to do in the cell besides watching the clock on the wall, and that he is planning on writing something in the books that were given to him. Tommy shows him how to spin the clock really fast, which Dream calls a new game. He says that he is doing well so far, that he gets fed raw potatoes and can write or “swim”. He goes on to jump into the lava that blocks off his cell, killing himself. Tommy teases him, Dream asking him to visit more as he is alone in the cell with no real interaction. He then argues that if he stays for a long while and gets better, he can be freed, however Tommy doesn’t agree. Dream then apologizes, presumably to convince Tommy he can be let go, and talks about feeling bad about things he lost during the Finale. Tommy gives him five books to write, saying it’s so that he can forgive him. After this exchange, Tommy asks who Dream misses the most, and Dream yells for Sam to make him leave.

Around this time, as he reveals later, Dream starts telling Sam about what he did to Tommy in exile, which leads to the Warden becoming increasingly fearful and especially hateful towards the prisoner.

Nine days later, BadBoyHalo decides to pay Dream a visit as well. Dream is slow to respond at first, commenting that BBH is the first visitor in a while. He says he’s doing good, and spins the clock, because apparently he burnt some of his books, and doesn’t write much anymore. Bad tries to be optimistic about his conditions, and Dream agrees in a very… unconvincing, tone of voice. (29:40 - 29:49)

He says that he gets potatoes, but they’re raw, so they’re not good food. Apparently, Sam has told him he couldn’t have any visitors for a few days, because he would try to get out. He concurs to Bad that he did bad things that got him locked up, and asks how Sapnap and George are doing - noting that they haven’t visited him yet. Bad tells him that Tommy has started a hotel, and about the Egg. Dream seems lethargic and preoccupied the entire time, spinning his clock - he says he’s named it, but doesn’t want to elaborate further. He gives Bad a note that says “thank you for visiting me badboyhalo!” and explains that his sentence is forever, which is later also confirmed by Sam, and goes on to talk more about the clock and how he “likes it halfway” it’s because c!Ranboo metaphorically is the clock-

He once again reiterates that there is not a lot for him to do, and that nearly no one has visited him. He reveals to BadBoyHalo that he sometimes does a “prank” where he’ll burn his clock, so that Sam has to come to replace it and he can see and say hi to him. After being asked whether or not he gets in trouble for it, he replies that Sam will sometimes deprive him of food as punishment, essentially starving him for his attempts at interaction, though Dream diminishes it and laughs about Sam reprimanding him. The Warden is planning to make an automated food dispenser so as to not have to come into the cell himself, which means even less interaction in essence. Despite all of this, he says that Sam is “treating him amazing” and that he’s happy. During the visit, he sniffles and coughs as he talks, voice low and void of energy.

BadBoyHalo wants to become a prison guard so that he can make the cell look nicer, perhaps giving Dream a potted plant and flower or two, as well as promising he’ll talk to George and Sapnap who Dream says he wants to visit him the most. He encourages him to look forward to better things, think positively, and - (42:03 - 42:20) As BBH freaks out, he explains that hurting himself this way is how he keeps himself entertained, setting himself on fire again. He says he wants to summon Bad into the cell by breaking a block when he becomes a guard, but goes back on this as it would potentially make Sam mad. Bad promises to visit with his friends, and leaves the cell.

He tells Sam that he needs to replace the clock, who refuses to, seeming frustrated with Dream’s antics. Bad tries to convince him to give it back, Sam saying it doesn’t matter whether Dream has it or not, although it’s basically one of Dream’s only sources of entertainment, and Bad tells him to give him one more clock as a compromise. Sam asks whether he… said anything, suspiciously enough? And Bad says they only talked a bit and that he jumped in the lava. Sam confirms he does that a lot and he thinks it’s for attention.

BadBoyHalo feels conflicted, to say the very least. (53:34-54:02 54:16-54:33 56:34-56:53 1:02:24-1:03:05)

That very same day, Ranboo has a strange hallucination-like nightmare about visiting Dream. However when he tries to visit again, Sam tells him that he visited not too long after Dream was first locked up, also bringing a memory book with him. Later, during the prison podcast with Techno, Dream himself mentions Ranboo and says that he “used to visit a lot” before stopping completely - this lines up with what Ranboo does afterwards, having Sam promise to never let him in again.

On February 7th, Dream dies in lava repeatedly on someone’s stream. This happens a couple of times throughout people’s time on the server, and seems to line up with Sam’s claim that he swims in lava pretty often.

Twenty-one days into Dream’s stay in the cell, Sapnap finally decides to visit. Dream stands mostly still and silent, holding the clock in his hand, and explains through books that he’s not talking because he’s on strike. He places the clock and spins it - Sam seems to have renamed it to “DO NOT BURN”. He tells Sapnap that he took too long, who responds that it took him a while because he felt hurt, but also says that Dream can talk to him if he wants to. Dream’s cell has had some of the obsidian changed out for crying obsidian as a security measure - Dream could’ve, and tried to, light a nether portal in the cell to escape. Sapnap tells him he needs to stay in the prison, because that is where he deserves to be - Dream burns his clock in response, insisting that he will get better and get out eventually. Sapnap threatens to kill him if he does - Dream simply tells him to deliver a message to Ranboo because he stopped visiting, a smiley face, which seems to trigger his enderwalk when received, and promises to stop throwing his clock away in return. Sapnap says he’ll visit more, and that he’ll tell George to visit him as well.

The next visit is nine days later, and is an attempt at getting closure. Tommy notes there’s a little hole on the prison roof when he goes to check up on it beforehand. (1:39-1:44). When Sam asks, Tommy says he thinks Dream is deserving of being locked up, but he highlights he doesn’t think he deserves death. He implies he could or might deserve torture though. (12:13-12:16). He says he’ll only ever visit Dream if he needs anyone revived from now on, calling it the only reason Dream’s still alive. Upon entering the cell, he notices some of the obsidian is now crying obsidian.

The first thing Dream tells Tommy is that he lost his clock since the last time he visited him. Tommy seems nervous, stumbling over his words. Dream eagerly tells Tommy he’s glad he came to visit him, that it’s been a while, and that he wishes he would visit him more. He says he likes having people visit him, that he likes just talking to them (23:46-23:49).

Tommy tells Dream this is his last visit. Dream argues that forever is a long time, asking why it is the last time. Tommy tells him he’s the pinnacle of villainy and that he wants to move on. He says he’s been suffering from success while Dream wasn’t there. Dream replies that he has been too, except without the success part, just suffering - Tommy says he had it coming. Dream nonchalantly replies with “yeah”. He goes on to say that maybe one day he could leave, saying he’s already been changing since he came. They talk about the crying obsidian, Tommy comparing the situation to exile, which devolves into an argument. He finds out that Dream burnt the books he was supposed to write, and that BadBoyHalo visited at some point. Dream asks him to visit again, but Tommy refuses, saying he’s terrible. Dream says that everyone thinks they’re in the right, and that he did bad things for good reasons (31:51-32:13) - Tommy refuses to listen to said reasons, listing Dream’s crimes again, and says he refuses to stress himself out by going to visit Dream any longer. Dream says he’s trying to change, promising to be better if he comes back, and Tommy says goodbye.

In that moment, explosions are heard going off in the distance. The two talk about it for a moment, before Tommy starts yelling for Sam. His name disappears and the Warden doesn’t answer as more TNT goes off, Tommy freaking out and Dream seeming to find it interesting.

Tommy starts begging Dream for a way out, and Dream tells him calmly that Sam is dealing with the security issue. Tommy doesn’t get it, so Dream explains that it means he could be stuck in there for a little bit, maybe even days. Tommy is getting desperate, Dream tells him he knows he signed a book, because he’s the one who wrote it, that said that if there’s a security issue, he can be in there for up to a week.

Tommy rambles about all the things he has to do that week and calls out for Phil. Dream suggests they break out together, but Tommy refuses this offer.

Dream gives Tommy some potatoes, who hits him and yells at him to explain, to which Dream yells back he has no idea what is going on as he’s locked in a room.

Tommy accuses Dream that he’s lying, saying it’s too perfectly timed to be a coincidence, calling him the monster of the server, saying he hasn’t changed, and Dream trying to convince him he did or he’s trying to. The two argue, Dream bringing up exile in the process, until Dream suggests to just deal with each other’s presence, not hit each other, and explains he’s happy to finally have company, Tommy panicking and saying he wants to hurt Dream. He takes the “thank you” books from the chests, as well as empty books and quills, and burns them despite Dream’s protests, telling him if Sam hears him panicking over the items, he’ll come back - Dream begs Tommy to just wait, panicked, and gives him potatoes.

After quite a bit of arguing and Tommy nearly punching Dream into the lava multiple times, Sam says the prison is on lockdown. Tommy is incredulous. Dream says it’s not that bad, that they have tons of time to bond, and after Tommy repeatedly calls him dumb and evil, Dream loses his cool, yelling that Tommy’s the one that’s being dumb. Tommy calms down as the realization sets in, and the stream ends.

The next time we see Dream and Tommy, the scene opens with Tommy running around the cell, making loud noises, and Dream sitting in the cauldron, writing. He’s frustrated and asks Tommy to be quiet - who looks at the cat that seems to have appeared in the cell, calling it annoying. Dream disagrees, saying it’s the best thing that’s happened to them - Tommy tries to repeatedly lead it away from its place on the chest, however the cat always comes back. He keeps asking Dream questions, punching the cat to which Dream stands in front of it, asking him to stop. Sam appears to give them potatoes. He asks Sam to let him out, who refuses as the security issue hasn’t been fixed yet. Tommy complains about not having enough food, to which Dream gives him some as well as Sam dispensing more into the cell. Tommy punches Dream away from the potatoes, also getting the clock. He tells Sam that this feels like exile, but worse, saying he’s claustrophobic - he refuses once again, and leaves the two alone. Dream says it’s not that bad - that he’s gotten used to the cell, that he’s happy to have company and a cat with him. He burns the clock, and after Tommy asks to be let out again, suggests they escape together - Tommy says no, punching the cat as Dream tries to stand in front of it to take the blow. He asks Dream if he loves it, killing it when he says that he does and wants it to stay after Tommy leaves. In response to this, Dream says that the cat was hope he could stay in the prison and be content, however now he’s even more motivated to escape and get his revenge on everybody who’s wronged him. He says he’s grown tired of Tommy’s whining about being in the same box he’s been locked in for a hundred times longer - Tommy tells him he will never get out, and Dream promises to never use the revive book on him or his friends. He says he’ll be freed someday, because the only way he’ll ever revive anyone, is if he’s let out - Tommy reveals he doesn’t think the revive book, the only reason people are keeping Dream alive, is real. They argue, Dream asking if the fact he can’t be killed because of the leverage he holds makes him some kind of god - Tommy disputes that he has said leverage, Dream killing him as a result to prove the point that his life still holds value because he can bring people back to life.

In the aftermath of this event, Sam reacts by saying he didn’t anticipate Dream actually killing Tommy - hence he never reached the cell in time. When Bad mocks him for this, he replies saying that he thought he had “broken the will out of him” to act up that way. He also reveals that Dream laughed when he started screaming at him - he says he can’t think of worse ways to punish him than he already does, not knowing what time it is, without the clock and with only raw potatoes as food.

After this happens, Sam leaves for an island that we see in Quackity’s lore later on. Quackity comes to visit him, only to rile him up and give him the idea to kill Dream in retaliation - however, when they arrive in the prison, Sam realizes that Tommy trusted him to keep Dream locked up and alive, and decides against it because of his duty and the revive book.

Two days after Tommy died, he was revived once again, with Dream asking him questions about death and the limbo, such as how long he’s been there, who he’s talked to, and what it felt like. He says he was scared it wouldn’t work, because he had never tried it before; Tommy details that being dead felt horrible, he’s talked to Wilbur and Mexican Dream although Schlatt, strangely enough, appeared to be asleep. He expresses signs of trauma when Dream punches him after being asked to do so, and has somewhat of a breakdown in the cell. Dream proclaims he is a god as he can revive people, and Tommy says Wilbur said horrible things to him while he was in limbo with him, and tried to get Dream to promise him that he would never bring him back, declaring Wilbur worse and more dangerous than Dream ever was - Dream refuses, saying he is the only one with the power to decide on that, and he thinks Wilbur hasn’t done anything that bad. He also suggests experimenting on Tommy to find out more about the afterlife, and perhaps even become unkillable. Tommy realizes Dream is the revive book, in essence, and there is no other way to get rid of it than to kill him, to make sure Wilbur stays dead forever. Dream invites him to kill him, however Tommy realizes he can’t, because then he’ll be stuck in the cell alone forever - Dream even walks into lava for him, all the while detailing the possible consequences of such an act.

Dream says that when Tommy gets out, he can tell everyone the revive book is real - that he wasn’t lying. He also says since he can kill everyone and bring them back, they’re his puppets - when Tommy asks him why he killed him, Dream says he wouldn’t listen to him, and hence he had to prove the legitimacy of the revive book to him. He says he’ll let Tommy go, and not kill him again, just so that Sam doesn’t cut off his visitors further or starve him again - but also promises to bring back Wilbur, with whose help he will escape.

After eight more days, Dream and Tommy are still stuck together within the room, Dream remarking that he’s starving, confirming Sam hasn’t come back to give either of them food during the time since Tommy’s revival. He lets Tommy keep his when he says he has only one, and the two bicker after Dream hits him. They’re bored, waiting for the Warden, and have no idea how much time has passed - Tommy burns his food in lava as they argue again, before Sam finally arrives, and Tommy is released. Tommy warns him to not allow Dream any visitors, saying he plans to escape, and that Techno owes him a favor. He also calls Sam inadequate to run the prison.

After this experience, both Ranboo and Tommy start plotting to kill Dream, so that he can’t “bring back the villains” of the past, present, and future, allowing them to rid the world of such dangerous individuals for good.

However, another person also ends up becoming interested in the powers of the revive book - and that person, is none other, than Quackity.

He doesn’t intend to destroy its powers for good, though. He persuades Sam into letting him bring weapons into the cell as a means of getting the revive book, taking away the last bit of power Dream has, and allowing them to take his final life. Sam agrees in the end, giving him better tools before he steps into the cell, including netherite weapons and shears. During the first visit, Dream comments he hasn’t had a clock in a while, Quackity saying the cell doesn’t look very comfortable. He goes on to talk about Dream’s loss of control since he got locked up, to which Dream asks if he came to gloat. Quackity brings up Tommy’s death, and Dream is interested in other people’s reactions. The topic goes back to the revive book, Dream asking again whether people knew it was real now, saying it’s good that they do. Quackity begins to ask that he gives it to him, but Dream refuses, saying he burnt it a long time ago and it is preserved only in the form of knowledge. Quackty takes out the weapons, and after the initial shock, Dream begins to frantically yell for Sam, not knowing the two are working together. Quackity promises to come torture him daily until he gets the revive book from him.

Around this time, the prison’s keycards are stolen by Ponk. Sam builds him a room, planning on killing him and then burning him with lava, beating and poisoning him until he gives them back, even though at this point they aren’t even functional. (4:05 - 4:24) Ponk tries to talk him out of it, saying that the prison is controlling him as much as the Egg would, and that he’s changed. (6:26 - 6:38) Sam ends up cutting off one of Ponk’s arms, successfully getting every last one of the defunct keycards back.

Later on, while BadBoyHalo and Antfrost are handing out invites to the Red Banquet on behalf of the Eggpire, Sam greets them holding a clock and gives them empty books & quills he claims to have confiscated from Dream.

In Quackity’s next lore video, we get confirmation that he has in fact been coming in daily to torture Dream, always escorted by Sam, using different tools and staining his shirt’s sleeves red.

Tommy finally decides to come and kill Dream, sneaking in with an invisibility potion while using Ghostbur as an alibi. The lava starts dropping, and Dream seems to run around the cell once, before coming to a stop at the center. Ghostbur yells excitedly when he finally spots Dream on the other side. He looks at Ghostbur, coming closer to the edge to wave at him, but stops waving when he spots Sam. He backs off slightly, breaking eye contact with Sam. Ghostbur and Tommy cross the lava, and Dream has his back turned on Ghostbur.

As soon as Tommy arrives at the cell, and before the netherite bars drop, he reveals the Axe of Peace. Sam yells at them to stop. Dream takes a step towards the entrance, Tommy immediately turns to him, trying to hit him. Dream backs off until he hits the wall, letting out a small “What?”. Tommy crosses the bridge while Ghostbur stays. Tommy and Sam argue, Dream interrupts, but Sam shuts him down, telling Ghostbur to get further away from him.

Dream pleads for Sam to let him out, who tells everyone to shut up, as Tommy is asking Ghostbur if he can reach Dream to kill him. Dream yells that he has a hostage. Sam answers that he’s just a ghost, while Dream stammers that Sam wouldn’t let another person die.

Tommy starts insulting Sam, calling him a horrible warden and telling him to kill Dream, and they start arguing again. (31:00-31:13, 33:50-33:58) Dream shows that he has the revive book in his hands. Ghostbur starts pleading for Tommy to help him. Tommy and Ghostbur count to ten, Sam telling them to shut up. After he shuts down a last request to set Dream free, he kills Ghostbur as the lava starts covering the entrance.

After well over two months of daily visits, a scene opens with Quackity showing Dream which weapon he will use that day, choosing an axe. Dream tries to take it off the item frame, however fails and only gets himself in trouble, with Quackity yelling at him while he cowers. He says it’s getting tiring, but that he needs to come in to remind him every day about everything he’s done or else he’ll forget, to which Dream promises he won’t. Quackity then proceeds to ask him questions about his involvement and relationship with Technoblade, and tells him to write a note, inviting him to visit. He refuses to say why, but promises to give Dream a week-long break if he obeys. Dream doesn’t trust him, continuing to question his motives. He tries to compromise, offering to write a note to Sapnap instead. Quackity goes on to threaten to kill him, saying he doesn’t care about the revival book, and that he likes hurting Dream, because in his eyes, he can never pay back the amount of evil Dream’s done to everyone on the server. He says not even Sam can help him, swinging his axe around and hitting Dream with a sword while he begs him to stop. In the end, Dream agrees to write the note for him.

Outside of the cell’s confines, Foolish proposes to Sam an idea to reform Dream through community service. This idea is shut down immediately.

MichaelMcChill, a new addition to the server, also tries to break him out a couple of times because - because he. Because he thinks he’s hot???

Interestingly enough, Quackity doesn’t have the note to give techno and just tells him to visit Dream verbally - Techno does, getting trapped in the cell in the process. And, well, in the end: (4:24 - 4:40)

That’s it for the recap!

Thank you.