#why does everything with the word ‘gotham’ in it goes like

[shahrwrites]

This has been on my mind for a long time and i really need to get it out.

Jason is not as bulky as y’all make him out to be.

He’s just not a malnourished little kid anymore.

Ok, I can see people try to argue that even in canon, he’s like really tall and really bulky and yes I’m look at you Gotham War. ಠ_ಠ

To be honest, I was hysterically laughing for like. Fifteen whole minutes before I calmed down enough to continue reading. For the love of god, Selina looks like a little teenage kid next to him. And she’s got heels on.

And by the way, this is how she looks next to Bruce, which is way more plausible than. Whatever that was.

Never mind, I think they drew all the males ridiculously big in this comic. (Or is Selina just really that smol??? Not that I was under the impression that she was huge or something, but for a woman who used to be one of Batman’s most notorious villains?? Man, idk)

The point is. Yes, Jason shoot up a few inches after the Lazarus pit. And yes, he also gained a few pounds of muscle, too. But not over-night and not because he was dunked in a war-machine-making bathtub. It’s because he wasn’t malnourished anymore. His stunted growth was resolved in the aftermath of the Lazarus and he wasn’t a skinny short baby from then on, because whatever he ate, his body was healthy enough to directly absorb. Batman annual #25 and the rest of the comics will want you to think differently. But. Just. No.

As dislikable as The Lost Days artwork was, at least they didn’t grow him into a giant over night and I think it’s the only good thing they did in that comic, too, because it would give more depth to his character to say that in the years leading up to UtRH, in addition to everything else, he put in the effort to build his body for the big confrontation. To mislead and shock Bruce as much as he could. But even then, he’s not a tank of a man. He simply has an athletically pleasant body. And, you know, he’s, like, not fifteen anymore?? So it makes sense.

However, it’s not to say that I don’t enjoy reading (whether in comics or fanfics) about the disorientation it brings the batfam to conform the picture of this well-built man before them with their mental image of the scrawny little kid their sweet baby Jason was, in their heads.

If people write Jason’s growth compared to his fifteen self and how it gives the family such a hard time, as maybe a little bulky, sure. I can wrap my head around it and actually enjoy it.

Otherwise, I see Jason as a little taller than Dick and about the same height, if not a little shorter, than Bruce. Actually, Dexter Soy’s representation of Jason felt pretty accurate to me. Which is a shame that the story of RHatO as a whole was such a trash. Maybe for the exception of the Rebirth vol. 1. But I’ll get to that another day.

[couldeatthatgirlforlunch]

I really loved your scenario of The Justice League AND The Ill reader,Lmao, poor reader they only need a rest.

Anyway, ever since I read the first part I was thinking about the kids, you know, the League Sidekicks, obviously The Reader knows them, due to work (I can really imagine Batman introducing His kids to the Reader to force a bond , And obviously The rest of The League does the same) So I had the headcanon that the reader really likes the children, they talk to them after missions, sometimes they buy them some gifts for their birthdays, they listen to them when they complain about their father figures (Therapist Reader), etc. But at the same time I can imagine The Reader being totally uncomfortable with his parents, so I can't help but think of a scenario in which The Reader is talking to the League kids in a good mood, but the League members walk in. to the room (They obviously saw the Happy Reader, so they want to gain some advantage) And The Reader just turns off, goes into business mode and is curt as always with the league, and when he finishes talking to the league, he goes back to talking to the children and their mood is happy again. Man I would love to see the league's reaction to the obvious reader favoritism

PD:I really love your work, you are amazing

Pd2:If The kids are yandere, ITS UP to you

A Week in Life: Take Your Kid to Work Day

Synopsis: A week in your life where you get a lot of new little friends, even if you know something’s sketchy about it.

Pairing: Yandere!Justice League X Assistant!Gn!Reader; Platonic!Yanderes! Robin (Dick), Superboy (Konner), Miss Martian, Kid Flash (Wally) and Aqualad (Kaldur'ahm)

Tw: A single implication about Hal’s past dub/non con incidente (blink and you miss it); Implied emotional manipulation, I guess? Justice League using kids as a manipulation tactic; A little angst, I think we all hate how Superman treated Conner, so I added that, so technically not a healthy relationship between them here, could be interpreted as Superman manipulating him or Superboy trying too hard to make his bio-dad like him; The kid’s ages are definitely not accurate canon wise, but what is canon anyway? I mixed their personalities and origins from Young Justice (along with their age gap) and for Superboy it was mainly the animated movie Reign of the Supermen; English is not my 1st language.

Word count: 3,3k

Requested? More than once.

Extra notes: Dick is 10, Kaldur'ahm, Conner, Megan and Wally are 13. I wish I knew more about the Wonder Girls to write about one of them, I felt bad for not adding them, but I would’ve felt worse writing for a character I have no idea how to write.

General masterlist | A Day in Life - Series masterlist

— I wasn't aware that there was a Take Your Kid to Work Day on schedule... — You said in a surprised, maybe taken aback, tone, if not a little strangled and sarcastic, even if a little happy. You rubbed your forehead, you knew your hunch was right…

Monday…

You’ve heard the rumors Gotham media was spreading for months now, you even asked Batman if you should prepare the marketing team in case of an emergency, he denied everything.

So why was it that now you were staring at a 10 year old dressed as a traffic light?

— Miss/Mister/Mx (Y/N)... I’m hungry… — Worst of all? The kid was cute.

You smile in a friendly manner.

— Okay, okay. Just give me a second, buddy, I need to talk to your… Dad…?! — You just now realized you didn't know their actual relationship. Batman only told you his name was Robin, that he was his partner, and that he was in the watchtower to observe. You didn't know superheroes accepted 10 year old interns, but whatever. The kid just stared blankly at you, not giving an actual answer to if you got your assumption right.

— Can I go with you? — Robin fiddled with his fingers. So cute. You nodded with a small smile. The kid jumped off his too big chair and ran towards you, surprising you by taking your hand. He had small hands. So cute.

You walked slowly, to accommodate to his height, in the direction of the door to the briefing room, where Batman was talking to John Stewart. This other Green Lantern was a breath of fresh air. The other one (the one who shouldn't be named) was away, working on another district of the universe since that whole… Less-than-consensual situation. You were happy and surprised when the League didn't just brush it off, and even compensated you for it, alongside making him go away. He either agreed to that, or caused the 3rd World War against the Justice League. It was a temporary predicament, but happier nonetheless, since John wasn't obsessed with you, unlike the rest of them, and easy to work with.

You cleared your throat so they would turn to you.

— Does Robin have any restrictions? He said he's hungry so I'm gonna take him to the kitchen. — You said politely. Batman shook his head.

— Just don't give him sugar. He needs to sleep before patrol tonight. — You raised your eyebrows in surprise and nodded your head. Batman looked at the boy. — Behave, chum. — You blinked, Robin nodded solemnly.

As you walked in the direction of the kitchen, the kid showed to be very happy and talkative. You were surprised, considering who his dad was, but it warmed your heart. At least it seemed he wasn't mistreated.

At some point, he let your hand go and started cartwheeling and doing acrobatics all the way there to show off his abilities to you. You gasped and clapped, praising his talent along with other workers from the crew who were passing the hall. You were slightly worried that he would fall and get hurt, but the kid was really confident in what he was doing (but they always are, until they fall).

When you got there, you were impressed that he wasn't even the slightest out of breath.

— Do you have games on your phone? — He asked, sitting down on a table while you rummaged the fridge for some sandwiches or any healthy snack, since you didn't know how his home diet was, but guessing by his build, which was a lot more athletic than kids his age are, he was probably pretty healthy. Son of the Bat.

— Hmm, I have Dress to Impress, Pou and Candy Crush.

— What is Pou? — Your heart panged and you sighed, feeling old.

— When were you born? 2010? — You walked towards him and settled a plate with a sandwich in front of him, before pouring a cup of juice.

— 2014. — Your mouth dropped, speechless. — Wait, so not even Stardew Valley? — You cleared your throat and shook your head, sitting beside him, while he started eating.

— Wait, can I even let you play? Does Batman let you have screen time? — He nodded.

— I have a phone. I just couldn't bring it with me today… He said he would show me around the tower, but he got busy with work… — He deflated a little at the end of the sentence, your heart broke. — Anyway… He told me I could distract myself. I just need your permission. — You bite your lip.

— Okay. How about we go to the recreational room and you can play some videogames while I work from the computer. — Robin nodded eagerly.

— Damn, you can't even play with me? Working sucks. That must be why adults are so boring. — You took a napkin and cleaned some food from his cheek.

— It's not that bad… You can do whatever you want. — He perked up.

— I guess so… — He looked you up and down. You prepared yourself for one of those moments where kids are so blunt that they don't know they could offend someone. — But you're not boring, (Y/N), you're cool. Must be why daddy likes you so much. And he doesn't like no one.

Tuesday…

Wow, what a weird coincidence. Just yesterday Batman brought his kid, and now Martian Manhunter brought his niece.

Miss Martian looked older than Robin, but again, she was a martian, her appearance was shifted to whatever she wanted to look like. All you knew was that she was young and new on Earth.

Right now, she looked very human. She had freckles and auburn hair. The only thing that made her stand out was the green of her skin.

When she presented herself to you, you got startled by her voice in your head, but you and Martian Manhunter softly explained to her that on Earth people didn't communicate through their minds, and it was kinda like an invasion of privacy. Kinda funny hearing him say that, but whatever.

Like Batman the day prior, Martian trusted the girl in your hands. So many coincidences, right?!

— So, honey, how old are you?

— Oh, on my home planet I should be about 39. But converting to Earth years, I’m 13. — She said with a shy but friendly smile, you smiled back.

— You’re pretty young then. How are you settling on Earth? Planning to go to school maybe? — She nodded.

— I just started the school year… I wasn't too sure about that, but my uncle said it would be good to learn human behaviors. — You nodded.

— American school is nice, I recommend you should take part in clubs. And don't feel pressured to make a billion friends. It's better to have one good friend, instead of 10 people you know but can't rely on. — She nodded, biting her lip.

— I already know some of the other sidekicks, I just don't have any civilian friends… I was thinking about joining the cheerleading team. — You gasped, excited.

— Oh, that's really good! I always wanted to join, but was never the sporty type. You’re sweet, I think that already gives you some points. — Her green cheeks got darker.

— You think so?! — Her voice got louder with excitement.

— Of course! Now let me give you some tips about the jocks, honey…

Wednesday…

Today, Flash brought Kid Flash. You haven't met him until now. The sequence of days the older heroes brought in their sidekicks was starting to look weird… But not that weird. Batman said he would give Robin a tour but became unavailable. Manhunter wanted Miss Martian to meet civilian people and have a good role model — you don't know why he decided that that role model should be you, but it made sense, so… —. Flash Said they would spend the day using the lab to experiment some more on Kid Flash’s still recently acquired powers. So. Coincidences, right?

The boy was 13 too, he had messy red hair and green eyes. Flash didn't specify their relationship, but their personalities definitely matched a little. Both a little hyperiperactive and smiley. Although that could be more of a speedster thing, especially the first part.

Like promised, they spent half that day on the lab, occasionally calling you for snack breaks. However, at some point, Flash gave an excuse and left you with the kid.

Huh.

— Sooo, what do you do around here? — Kid Flash asked, spinning around in a chair he found somewhere and rolled to the middle of your office in the blink of an eye. You half-smiled. It was nice not being crowded by those weirdos and being around fresh and youthful people, but it was starting to feel weird.

— I plan schedule appointments, organize team meetings, prepare agendas and itineraries, book meals and travel arrangements, handle record keeping and documentation, and make sure a project stays on budget. — The ginger blinked and stopped spinning.

— Uhh, you went to college for that? — You blinked.

— I did, why? — He chuckled slightly.

— Nothing, it's cool, sounds boring, though. — You nodded.

— What do you want to work with? — He looked to the side, thoughtful for a moment.

— I think I want to be a scientist.

— Oh really?

— Yeah, I like physics, mechanics and a little bit of chemistry. — You smirked.

— Chemistry? Sounds boring. — Kidflash froze for a second, wide-eyed, then relaxed and started laughing loudly. His chuckling prompted you to chuckle alongside him.

He used his feet to push the chair around your table and stopped at your side.

— Hey, can I see how much people get paid here? If I'm gonna be a member of the League one day, might as well optimize time and just work here. — You slapped his hands away when he reached for your computer, he pouted.

— Wouldn't that make it difficult to keep your secret identity hidden?! — Kid Flash stretched his arm, then draped it across your shoulders, you lifted an eyebrow.

— Babe. I'm a superhero. I could change clothes really fast right now and you wouldn't even notice. — You scoffed and lightly pushed him and his chair away.

— A phone booth would be more appropriate for that.

— What's a phone booth?

Thursday…

Superman brought Superboy.

Why the fuck are they doing that, bro?

You didn't even know they were close! Sure, Superboy is Superman and Lex Luthor’s clone, the whole world knew that, and that Superboy took to Superman's side. But they were never seen together, unlike Flash and Kid Flash, or Batman and Robin, for example.

Worst of all? It looked like the mood between them was… Weary. Especially on Superman’s part. Did he not trust Superboy? You could understand that… But look at his puppy sad face!

And not even five minutes later, Superman just flew away, saying something about a hurricane in Texas, AND SUPERBOY STAYED!

The silence was awkward for a few seconds. You thought back to the personality he showed when he was first announced by LexCorp, when Superman was considered dead. He was all over the media (Lex’s marketing team was good) with his charisma and flirty personality. Although he kept the leather jacket, his quietness surprised you.

You cleared your throat.

Superman brought Superboy.

Why the fuck are they doing that, bro?

You didn't even know they were close! Sure, Superboy is Superman and Lex Luthor’s clone, the whole world knew that, and that Superboy took to Superman's side. But they were never seen together, unlike Flash and Kid Flash, or Batman and Robin, for example.

Worst of all? It looked like the mood between them was… Weary. Especially on Superman’s part. Did he not trust Superboy? You could understand that… But look at his puppy sad face!

And not even five minutes later, Superman just flew away, saying something about a hurricane in Texas, AND SUPERBOY STAYED!

The silence was awkward for a few seconds. You thought back to the personality he showed when he was first announced by LexCorp, when Superman was considered dead. He was all over the media (Lex’s marketing team was good) with his charisma and flirty personality. Although he kept the leather jacket, his quietness surprised you.

You cleared your throat.

— So… Are you hungry? Wanna play videogames? — You grimaced slightly. He looked at you again, a little hesitant.

— Uh… I think so? — He blinked. — You guys have videogames here?! — He exclaimed, surprised. You chuckled.

— Oh yeah, for such a serious and stern guy, Batman really invested in the work environment. — You chuckled together, walking towards the recreational area.

You were curious about the earlier weird vibe, but didn't want to prod.

At first, you just let the boy play by himself, just sitting beside him and working while talking, that was until he paused the game between missions and stretched, then looked at you.

— Are you guys involved? — You looked at him with your eyebrows raised.

— You guys…? — He pursed his lips.

— You and Superman. — You grimaced slightly.

— Oh no, he's my boss, and not my type at all. — He nodded, looking pensive.

— He likes you. — You kept a blank expression, waiting for him to continue. — I like you too, so I can imagine why he likes you. — You stared at him, exasperated. He widened his eyes. — Not like that! — He raised his hands to deny. — It's just- I feel comfortable with you. I felt comfortable with some of his friends before, I didn't even know why, but I think it's because half of me is from him. Like I have some things from Lex since I was… Born… — He looked to the ground for a second, pouting lightly. — That's why Superman doesn't like me. — You widened your eyes.

— I'm sure he likes you! — Superboy looked at you like he didn't believe you.

— No, it's okay… He's polite, I guess. And took me in as his family, just not… As his son… More like a brother, or… A cousin… I mean, I can understand, I'm basically a hate baby, created by his biggest enemy to outdo and destroy him… — You shook your head.

You didn't know what to say, since you didn't know how their dynamic was like.

— H-He brought you here to spend time with you, didn't he? He just had an emergency to take care of… — He looked to the ground and then at you again. He didn't have the heart to tell you that's the first time they ever “hung out”, and that his genius brain clocked hours ago that Superman's plan was to create a connection between you both by orchestrating a connection with you and him. He also didn't want to bad mouth Clark. A part of him always would have hope that Superman would want to be closer to him one day.

Superboy looked at the clock and then at you.

— Don't you have a break? I can hear your stomach, I'm hungry too.

Friday…

This madness has to stop now.

— Nice to meet you, Aqualad. — You nodded at the boy with a small smile. You were a little mesmerized by his exotic appearance. He had brown skin, blonde hair in braids (where are his roots?) and blue eyes. His arms were also covered in tattoos that you knew had something to do with his abilities.

— I was showing him around the Watchtower, but now I have a meeting with Wonder Woman, why don't you two hang out for a while? — Aquaman, always the most obnoxious one. Their intentions were 100% clear now.

Aquaman didn't let you say anything else and left the room with said hero. You heard her murmur something about having to find her own apprentice to bring to the watchtower as soon as possible.

You looked at the boy, not knowing what to say.

— Have you ever been to Atlantis? — He surprised you by speaking first, his tone was gentle, if not a little monotonous, but he looked at you with interest.

— Uhhh, no? I’m not that good of a swimmer and I can't breathe underwater. — Aqualad smirked lightly.

— You wouldn't need to worry about breathing, there are multiple ways for humans to do that, from magic to technology. As for swimming… I'm sure we can find some sort of solution for that, also. And I doubt my king would be opposed to the idea of teaching you. — You nodded slowly. So much for subtly.

— … My vitamin D is low enough as it is, I’d rather stay on land, no offense. — The atlantean opened his mouth to speak but you beat him to it. — Aqualad! Do you like the food here? I've always been curious about your culture’s cuisine…

You kept talking for hours, eventually, Aqualad and you ended up in the training room, he offered to show you a little of his control over water bodies, and you, still a little fascinated over the convivence with superheroes, and this being the second time you met someone from Atlantis, accepted eagerly.

— This is just like H2O… — Kauldur’ahm blinked.

— It is water… — The boy confirmed, hesitantly. You laughed.

— No, no, not water. It's a TV show, it's about mermaids. I guess it isn't exactly accurate, but they can control water, just like you! — He nodded, slowly, contemplating. You looked at your watch, noticing your lunch time was due. You looked at him, shyly. — If you're up for it, we could watch it now… — That seemed to make him perk up a little and he nodded quickly.

— I would like to.

Monday…

— I wasn't aware that there was a Take Your Kid to Work Day on schedule... — You said in a surprised, maybe taken aback, tone, if not a little strangled and sarcastic, even if a little happy. You rubbed your forehead, you knew your hunch was right…

There they were, in the meeting room, all seated around the big roundtable, almost double the number of people who usually sit there.

Now, the food order they made, made sense.

You pushed the food cart forward, one for Flash. You came back and pushed another one, this one for Kid Flash, you ruffled his hair. Then, you walked back and pushed the 3rd food cart around the table, delivering each meal for each hero.

— Steak for Green Lantern. One black coffee for Batman. One meat sandwich and chocolate milk for Robin. — You squeezed his cheek. He smiled brightly at you. — Toast for Martian Manhunter and a slice of strawberry cake for Missy Miss Martian. — As you put the plate in front of her, you whispered that you wanted to know how the cheerleading team was going. She nodded happily. — A burger with fries for Aquaman, a smoothie and salad for Aqualad. Oh, did you change your hair? I like it! — You smiled brightly at the boy and his cheeks burned, he nodded. — Ice cream for Wonder Woman. Another burger and fries for Superman and another for Superboy. I see you followed my advice, your style really matches with those piercings. Tell me how you did it later. — You laughed carelessly and went to the door. — Need me for something more? — Your bosses shook their heads, stunned. You left and closed the door.

— Can't believe you guys actually did it… — John shook his head, disappointed at his teammates.

— I knew it would work. — Batman said, sipping from his drink.

— That's why we stole your idea when we knew about it. — Aquaman chuckled.

— I really need to find a sidekick. — Diana huffed.

Batman turned to Robin.

— You did a good job, chum. — Dick chuckled.

— Yeah, I even asked for a sandwich without the crust. Now (Y/N) think I'm the cutest here. — He smirked smugly. Wally scoffed.

— Yeah, right. She totally doesn't think you're an annoying kid. — The duo stared at each other. — I, for example, made them laugh. — The redhead puffed his chest proudly.

— Are you sure it wasn’t a pity laugh?! — Superboy snorted at Robin’s retort.

— Although Robin might be physically more adorable, and Kid Flash, in his words, made them laugh. (Y/N) and I started a TV show together, my king. — Aquaman nodded at his apprentice’s words.

— You did a good job.

— But (Y/N) actually said they wanted to talk to me later! That usually oficializes human’s friendships! — Megan said, softly.

— They said the same to me, the other day. That I could talk to them whenever I wanted… — Superman looked at Superboy, surprised. He felt awkward praising him, so he just nodded his head and looked away. Superboy pouted slightly.

— Because you told them your sob story, now they think you're a loser. — Conner glared at Dick. — Their physical language showed that they loved me, B! I honestly deserve an Oscar after that performance! They're gonna be ours before you suckers know it!

As a screaming match raised inside the room, the adult heroes looked at each other, lost for words, not only had the kids gotten you roped a bazillion times faster then they could ever dream, but also you were so amazing that they were enamored with you too.

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[heavysighing-dreamyeyes]

Congratulations on the well-deserved 900 followers.

"That was the most fun I’ve had in years.”

Carnival Date

Don't ask me how, but this turned into 600 words

It had taken a little convincing, and maybe a few well placed bribes, but you had managed to get Jason Todd to join you at the Gotham City fairgrounds.

You had planned it all, carnival games, pig races, greasy, fried fair food, and rides that made you want to puke all that food back up.

It was nearly perfect, even if Jason didn't seem completely excited, he still won you a prize at the shooting game. (Stunning the worker who had seemed so sure he would lose) He still indulged in milkshakes, chili dogs, and enough fried dough you nearly went into a food coma.

But for as fun as it all was, it wasn't perfect enough. You wanted him to have a good day. A day he could look back on as a fond memory. A memory with you.

And you had almost done it! Almost created the best, most wonderful day. Until it started to rain, just before you got in line for the ferris wheel.

Jason had been quick to usher you both undercover, watching as the busy crowds practically disappeared to seek shelter from the impending storm.

The dark, rolling clouds made your heart drop. It wasn't supposed to rain today. You had checked the weather, found the one day Gotham was supposed to have sun, planned incessantly, done everything you could to make the day amazing, and now it was ruined. And you had barely managed to make him smile.

Your shoulders slump, trying to hide the defeated look on your face as the sky starts to downpour. Which was sooo great, of course. You're sure Jason will love getting soaked to the bone.

Who are you kidding? You shift your weight, certain he'll never go anywhere with you again.

"This was the most fun I've had in years," Jason's easy tone cuts through your self-deprecating thoughts, and you snap your head towards him.

He can't be serious. You narrow your eyes slightly, almost offended he would lie, "It's raining."

He nods sagely, holding his hand out to catch some droplets on his fingers, "That it is."

"It doesn't look like it's going to stop," You point out.

"No, it doesn't," he agrees idly, eyes finally meeting yours.

"We're going to get wet," you try, uncertain why he seems so calm.

"We can use my jacket as cover if it bothers you," he drawls, already moving to tug his arms out of the sleeves.

"No," You say quickly, grabbing his arm to stop him. He goes still, and his lips quirk up in a half-smirk.

"Then what's the problem? We can handle some rain," he asks, catching your fingers when you move to drop your hand. He rubs your hand between his palms, and you didn't realize how cold they were until he starts sharing his warmth.

"I just– I wanted today to be nice," you mumble, a little embarrassed.

"It was, still is," he says, voice as soft as his eyes.

You fall quiet for a moment, biting back most of the arguments you want to make as he continues to warm your hands, "The fair's going to close."

"We can go to that restaurant down the street instead," he suggests, tugging your hand into his pocket. He does it so casually, you almost don't even register it, "the one you like to get takeout from?"

You stare at him, one hand in his jacket pocket, and the other on the prize he's won for you. He always seems to find a way to catch you off guard, to shut down every negative thought circulating in your head.

"Yeah. Okay," You agree, almost knocked breathless by the smile that spreads across his face.

"Good. C'mon," he tells you, and soon enough, you find yourself giggling and running from cover to cover with him.

Your clothes stick to your skin, your socks are soaked, and your hair is completely unsalvageable, but his eyes are just as bright as yours. And it's perfect.

[im-totally-not-an-alien-2]

"Hello." A dull thwack sound reverberated across the rooftop, leaving the boy who snuck up on Red Robin clutching his head. The boy, a meta if the large animal ears and tail were anything to go by, shook off the pain and pouted up at him, "What was that for?!"

The vigilante was unrepentant, holding his bo staff in a ready position, "You snuck up behind a vigilante at night. In Gotham."

"Okay," the meta conceded, still pouting. "You have a point there. Robin threw ninja stars at me when I tried to approach Batman."

That got Tims attention, "You tried to approach Batman? Was there something you needed?"

The kid suddenly got serious, "My mom went missing. I haven't been able to contact her for almost two weeks now."

Red pulled his arm closer to his face before he began typing on his wrist computer, "Can you tell me her name and date of birth?"

"Um." The other teen fidgetted with his tail a bit, "Okay, so...she's kinda Cheetah."

"...come again?"

"She's Cheetah. The...the supervillian."

Red Robin stared at him, and honestly who could blame him? The bats hadn't even known Cheetah had a son. "So why are you in Gotham? Why not ask Wonder Woman for help? Cheetahs one of her rogues not ours."

The teen shook his head, "She went to meet someone in Gotham before she disappeared. She seemed really agitated before she left, almost scared. I've never seen her like that before." He paused, giving the vigilante time to type before continuing, "I didn't go Wonder Woman since I figured I would wind up needing to talk to a bat anyway since its your turf and all." He said, waving a hand as if gesturing to the city around them.

"I wasn't aware Cheetah had a kid."

The meta grimaced, "she didn't until a year ago."

Red gave him a look, as if urging him to go on.

The meta chuffed, sounding a lot like whatever big cat he was supposed to be, "I'll only tell you my tragic backstory if you promise to help me find my mom."

"I'll find your mom." The bird said without an ounce of hesitation. Tim was a little offended. Did this guy think he was going to leave his mom in danger just because she was a criminal? Appearently so, seeing as the teen looked so relieved at his words.

"Okay, so my bio parents were evil mad scientists. Always a bad start, anyway they were obsessed with the occult and one day they suddenly took me and my sister to Brazil to hunt for some artifact of another. That alone was strange but weirder still was the fact my creepy godfather was paying for it all. He usually only does something like that when he's plotting "

"Plotting?" The detective interjected, "you make it sound like he does that often."

"Yeah. Hes a supervillian." The meta said casually, as if he didn't just leave Tim reeling, but the kid wasn't done yet, "He's had a massive crush on my bio mom since collage and never let it go no matter how many times she rejected him. She even married my dad, his best friend, and this dude just kept simping for 20 years." The teen rolled his eyes, "Hes convinced himself that if he murders my bio dad then my bio mom will fall in love with him and me and jazz will be "his"." He said that last part with fingerqoutes and a disgusted expression.

Tim filed that away for later, "Can I have his name, if nothing else?"

The teen seemed reluctant for a moment, "You're the worlds greatest detectives. You'll find out even if i try to hide it. Besides, I'd probably be better off if you and the Justice League know everything anyway."

Tim was...surprised by that. Most people usually weren't this open with them.

"His name is Vlad Masters, he also goes by Plasmius when he's dressed like a wannabe vampire. He's a ghost who's repossessed his corpse. My parents are Jack and Maddie Fenton, who are obsessed with ghosts and have convinced themselves that all ghosts are evil and must be destroyed, regardless of how much evidence points to them being wrong."

"And your name?"

The meta grinned at him, showing off four very sharp fangs, reminiscent of the large cat he takes after, "You can call me Jaguar. We were exploring a bit when I broke off from my family and got jumped by one of them. Suddenly I was struck by a claw and turned into furry bait. Fluffy stopped trying to make me his lunch and just stared at me before walking away, which was wierd. Then my parents found me, accused me of being a ghost, because thats naturally what someone would assume when thier son sprouts cat ears," he said while rolling his eyes.

"Naturally." Red joked, which had the benefit of making Jaguar smile.

"So my parents chased me through the jungle, shooting all the while, then suddenly a portal opened up in front of me. I'm not stupid, I know there was no way this wasn't a trap. I mean, a portal opening up right after that bizarre series of events and its the same shade of glowing green as the wierd death go my parents are obsessed with? There's no way they weren't related somhow, but I was desperate and jumped through anyway."

"I landed in another jungle, or the same one in a different location, I'm not sure. I tried hunting and foraging but wasn't very successful at either." Danny still remembered the throbbed in his head when he had headbutt that tree after missing his pounce on that pig he had been stalking. "Thats when Cheetah found me. She took me in and taught me to hunt and fight."

-----

Possible plot twists:

1. Danny isnt Phantom in this au

2. Danny is Phantom in this au but is trying to leave that life behind

3. My favorite. Danny has the ability to manipulate and control animals into doing his bidding with the effect of jaguars and other big cats being the most prevalent and he just doesn't realize it.

One of Cheetahs friends/allies realizes cheetah has changed and suspected something and convinced her to leave for a while to see if her care for this kid faded after a while away from his presence. It works and Danny loses another parental figure/possibly attacked by them too.

[mxtantrights]

Hi! Can i ask some quick enemies to lovers with Jason Todd? Which is not much "enemies" but two prideful people that won't admit they have feelings for each other and they like... have similar personalities. It can be sfw or nsfw, it's up to you <3

Byee, thanks.

(Maybe reader also being a vigilante too hehe)

a/n: thank you for this amazing request. I was about to have so much fun with this!!! (also kinda left it open so if there is a desire for part two, just leave me a message!! <3)

It doesn't hit either of you like a brick wall or a train like it should. No. Because why would it? Love doesn't hit you over the head in the middle of the night. It happens slowly.

It happens when Oliver asks you to cut home early because you almost missed a step and went over the rooftop of a building. Which you deny but you know it happened because Oliver is never really one to say 'go home'. So you take his orders. Oliver shakes his head as he watches you go. Ever since he told you that some of the team from Gotham was coming to Star City to help a case you've ben off your game.

It happens when Jason doesn't see the trip wire. Dick has about seven seconds to clear the room and drag Jason with him. The two of them get safely away from the loud bomb. Bruce is talking over the comms, asking if everything is alright. Jason grumbles out some sort of response. Dick knows he's not on his A-game because he's part of the crew going to Star City, where you operate.

It happens when you come face to face with Red hood after not seeing him for a few months. The last time you saw him he saved you from a round of gunfire. You couldn't figure out if he saved you because it was the right thing to do or for some other reason.

It happens when the two of you have to guard a safe house for a couple of hours. There is nothing to do. It's mindless boredom. It's endless. It's so boring and Red doesn't make it easier because he doesn't try to converse with you either. You try to make small talk but he seems to talk in grunts or just silence.

It happens when the mission goes wrong. The informant is nipped on someone else's patrol. You and Red are called in to figure out who did it and to track their every move. You spend about eight hours by his side and say about ten words to him.

It happens when you two find the culprit and are faced with a difficult decision. Take justice into your own hands or hand them over to the Oliver and Bruce. Red leaves it up to you.

And for some odd reason, that's when you realize it. At that moment it dawns on you. Like the final crumb of sand falling in a hourglass. You like Red. You like him even if he doesn't speak a word to you, or if you fail and fumble in front of him.

You try your best to keep it to yourself.

But it's hard to do that when he seems, different.

After that night when he left the choice up to you, he seems to be another version of himself. A version you didn't know existed. He greets you, he tries to make small talk, and he gives you compliments and praise.

Oliver and Bruce notice it too. They keep their smiles and shit eating grins to themselves. Honestly the two of them honestly make this a thing amongst themselves. Who can get the ball rolling first?

Bruce asks Jason about it one night after patrol. To which Jason replies with a stern 'no' and nothing else. Oliver asks you when he takes you out for lunch and you also tell him a simple 'no' and move on.

It keeps happening like this. Red does something that makes you think maybe, sort of, possibly. But you don't take that step. And Red goes through the same thing about you. And talks himself out of telling you anything.

One day though, it does come to an end.

You're in an alley in Gotham. You're not on a mission. You're just a civilian in this situation. A civilian who wants to take an alleyway cut instead of walking two blocks. It's safe to say that when you get held up at gun point you regret not walking those two simple blocks.

What goes down, goes down fast. You manage to get the jump on two of the scumbags. But one of them does have a gun. They aim it right at you and the shot should hit you but it doesn't. It doesn't because of someone.

Red hood stands between you and the gun. The bullet flies off his patted amor chest. You watch as all the guys in the alleyway scurry like rats. You're left there, wide eyed and shocked.

Red Hood turns to you and offers you a hand up. You take it, and try to think of something to say. Anything. A thank you. A sorry. Something that should leave your mouth. But all you can think about is how he's saved your life again.

And that's the word you say. 'again'

It catches him off guard. So much so that he takes a step back. You think you might've said the wrong thing. But then again, you think to yourself that he won't really know what you're talking about. You're seeing him as a civilian. He's never seen you as a civilian. He doesn't know who you are.

But he could now.

He could now.

[frownyalfred]

« it took him longer to die in that alley than people realized. Alfred, when reading the autopsy report, believed it was due to his need to ensure Bruce was safe. Martha died nearly instantly. » That's why I love Snyder's version of the Waynes' death so much.

Also, do you think that Thomas actually tried to defend his family by directly dealing with the mugger with violence, like in Snyder's version, or was he more cooperative with the mugger ? Maybe both ?

Yeah! It's such a cool version -- contrasts very nicely with the Dark Knight trilogy version. It answered the question a lot of people asked after Batman Begins -- why didn't Thomas fight back? Why did he try to de-escalate when the mugger was so twitchy? Why was he weak (Ra's word for him, said to Bruce) when he could have protected his family?

BVS Thomas does exactly that -- he sees the gun, he puts his family behind him, and he goes after the mugger. JDM is a big man in that movie. He looks intimidating. I'd believe him as Flashpoint Batman, tbh. And yet, he still dies. And then Martha dies. And he's still alive to see the life go out of her eyes. It's crushing.

I suppose my take on the pivotal alley scene depends on if you truly believe the Waynes were cursed to die in that alley no matter what. The common advice when being mugged is to just hand everything over without a fight. Most muggers aren't out for a murder charge. They just want stuff. Hand over the wallet, and your family is fine.

But in the Dark Knight movies, Thomas hands over the wallet. And he still dies. It's explained as the mugger being twitchy, the gunshot is a surprise and then Martha freaking out causes him to overcommit and shoot her too. In BVS, it's much more of an execution. The mugger takes a moment to thread the gun through Martha's pearls and shoot her, almost intimately.

So Thomas loses whichever path he chooses, de-escalation or fighting. He is still at the mercy of the gun, even as strong and as capable as he is. And if he doesn't die, if Martha isn't shot, then Bruce is, as we see in the Flashpoint Paradox. No winning, in any timeline.

People make bad choices in tense situations, like getting mugged. If you're not used to that kind of situation, it's so hard to stay calm and make the "right" choice. There's a LOT of victim blaming that goes on about Thomas, some of it poking fun at him, some of it highlighting more of the Wayne's naiveté about living above Gotham. But in his shoes, in that split second, what exactly WAS the right choice?

I always thought that a combo of the two "styles" of this scene would be best -- Thomas fighting back the mugger after trying to negotiate, getting shot, and then using the last of his strength to try and stem the bleeding from Martha. When that doesn't work, he collapses on/around Bruce so the mugger thinks he's dead too, and tells Bruce to stay down and that he loves him. It also works this way if you buy into the "the Waynes were taken out as a hit disguised as a mugging" theory/storyline -- Bruce survived, when he shouldn't have, because of Thomas.

Sorry to ramble. I have a lot of loosely formed thoughts about this. Curious what others think.

[puppetwoman17]

Would you ever expand upon your joker junior thoughts more? I think that was such a well written idea and would love to hear what else you think about it

Oh my god yes. 100000% YES!

That post before was more of an idea vomit, didn’t cover all of what I thought, so I’m happy to hear someone wants to hear more.

So, JJ’s always been a tough convo for Tim. Obviously. But it’s not just because of how traumatizing the Joker can be, or about the shocks and psychological torture. It also reminds him of a grim time in his life. With Bruce still going through the motions post-Jason’s death, and Dick frequently spending all his time in Bludhaven, he hadn’t been watched much. Save for Babs, ofc.

That’s actually why they’re so close. She’s much more emotionally competent thanks to her dad, lol.

JJ wasn’t only a big thing for Tim, but for Gotham too. In a place like this, it wasn’t hard for whispers from the Joker’s men to travel to civilians and cops. Everyone knew why Robin was nowhere to be seen. Everyone knew why Batgirl looked the way she did, agitated and worried. Everyone knew why the cops searched that same warehouse over and over, never allowing anyone inside.

Which was also why no one was happy to see Nightwing, very obviously the first Robin, return after yet another sabbatical in Bludhaven. Of course, that stopped a little after everyone collectively realized that, oh crap, he doesn’t even know!

This begins a collective effort by the more clear-minded people of Gotham to NOT disclose anything JJ related. There has to be a reason, right? No way were they going to force Robin #3 to disclose anything he didn’t wait to. It didn’t hurt that a year or two later, a mysterious figure named Oracle began effectively making every news article or picture related to JJ disappear.

Everyone holds their breaths for the next few months. What if what happened to the second Robin happened to him? What if he was too crippled to go back out?

As the Batfamily grows bigger, it becomes way clearer that Robin #3 hasn’t said a WORD. Not even after they grow closer, when the screaming and murder attempts and arguments cease. He doesn’t say a word, so no one else does either.

Tim goes to great lengths to medicate himself against any variant of Joker venom or gas. The familiar smells just… bring things back to the surface.

He tries not to act like Jason whenever the Joker gets out of Arkham. It’s already hard for everyone to hold him back from killing the monster. Jason doesn’t need some second-rate copy of his trauma trying to get sympathy. Unlike Jason, he didn’t die. He didn’t come back differently, or lose footing on his life, his job, whatever.

It would just be better if Tim acted as aloof and concentrated as he always did. Not make a big scene, and follow Batman’s orders to a T. No need to worry anyone.

Honestly, the only reason no one notices the literal war going on in this boy’s head is because he doesn’t want to cause a scene.

Oh, and if you’re wondering what he says when one of the bats finds him the next night, still avoiding them…

Yeah, he full on denies EVERYTHING. Looks whoever it is, Jason, Steph, Dick, straight in the eye and says that what they saw was fake. Edited. Something to threaten Bruce with years ago. Tim just ran because…because…Anyway, he’s fine. Don’t worry about Tim Drake. He’s fine.

Babs groans over the comms when everyone hounds on her to tell them everything. Like hell is she gonna tell them a single thing until she has Tim’s full permission.

[auroreliis]

Not sure if you'll even see this LMAO. But I love the way you think, so I wanna know your take on Nightwing/Dick Grayson with an antihero. Someone who's constantly swinging between hero and villainy

I love this idea!

The thing with Dick is that he would be so annoying on this:

"Be careful, you'll hurt yourself!"

"I don't want to fight you. I'm doing this for your own good"

"I didn't want to give back ALL the money you stole, but if you do not stop fighting now, I will return the whole lot of it!"

You often find yourself knocked out and tied to a chair by him. In a safe place, of course, he wouldn't want you to get hurt, but man, those chains are thick...how will you get out? (You don't, he comes and frees you when everything has settled and brings you home...)

After his first encounter with you, he'd get Bruce to find out who you are. And then you're in for it...

He'd casually call you by your real name on your next encounter. The smirk on his face merely widening as you look at him confusedly.

"What the hell do you want?"

"So that IS your name? It has a nice ring to it..."

Your eyebrows furrow as he mumbles your name to himself a few more times like a madman. He didn't even notice you slip away.

The panic ensues as he goes around for a bit, trying to find you. He lost you...completely...what an escape artist you are...

And not only the first few times, you manage to slip away every time he even dares to blink. How sneaky of you. He's impressed truly.

However, he does not tolerate it when youngsters like you, with no training, try to act tough. Whether you're a good guy or a bad guy, he will not allow you to fool around anymore. Haven't you got a life? How do you expect to get sleep if you jump around on roofs every night? How immature of you.

And so starts his nagging.

His first thought is bribery. He'll give you whatever you want, as long as you stop fooling around like this, lest you hurt yourself.

If your main interest is material things, this will work. He will give you whatever you want. Whatever your heart desires. Just keep away from Gotham's moonlit streets. Go to bed, watch a film or something else, just please stay inside.

If your primary interest is more adrenaline than anything else, then he will need to get more creative. He will encourage you to seek entertainment through other means. Video games, escape rooms, laser tag, in fact, he will even encourage you to become a hero instead of being on the borderline.

If this doesn't work, he won't give up, it's just that Bruce finds a few holes in the walls of the manor. And Jason notices Dick being more irritable. And Tim, Steph and Cass notice that he doesn't joke around as much. And Damien notices the serious look on his face.

His attempts usually end with this line:

"Being a hero is extremely exhilerating, so why not choose to be good?" (Or, in other words, why not choose to be closer to me?)

Luckily (for you), you chose to come with him. God knows what would've happened if you hadn't...

[sunnie-angel]

Part 11: The Eavesdropper

part 10 | series masterlist | ao3 link

jason todd x f!reader

summary: no one really talks about how getting half of what you wanted is almost worse than nothing at all. as the killer haunting gotham starts closing in, you'll have to rely on jason anyway, no matter what it does to your poor heart

tags: off screen violence, reference to serial killer, reference to torture, implied (off screen) sexual violence, slight misogyny, implied sexual content

rated explicit (mdni) | wc: 2.2k

a/n: surprise! @janybabyy left some wonderfully enthusiastic tags on the last update that hit my brain just right so now you have another chapter! we are getting darker with content, so please heed the tags and let me know if you think anything is missing

Sleeping with Jason Todd does not cure you of your feelings for him. If anything, it digs the knife in deeper. You know him now – the smell of his skin sleep-warm, the way his chin drops to his chest when he comes, how tender his voice can curl around your name –  only you don’t have any reason to keep your distance anymore. Can card your fingers through his curls in the privacy of your apartment, tangle your legs together, steal sweet mouthed kisses from him. You have Jason now, as much of him as he’ll let you have, and it hurts worse than having nothing at all. A slow acting poison that tastes sickeningly sweet as it slides down your throat burning everything it touches on the way down.

The pain of the distance he used to insist upon is nothing compared to the agony of his closeness. He whispers tender things into your ears he doesn’t mean, helps himself to your personal space with a casual cruelty, keeps being the friend (god you hate that word) that you’d fallen in love with only he won’t love you back.

It helps, a little, that there’s still this unseen line drawn between your friend – Jason – who you see in the daylight, and your fuckbuddy – Jay – that only appears when the door to your apartment is firmly closed. Jason is kind, brings you homemade lunches and takes your bag when he walks you home. He makes you laugh, bickers good naturedly with your friends, camps out in the library with you as long as you need. He pays attention to you, considers your words and the weight of them, makes sure your voice never goes unheard. Your friend Jason makes you feel like you could take on the world with the strength of his belief in you. If Jason makes you feel 10 feet tall, Jay does the opposite. Jay has you second guessing every move, every word, just in case you drive him away again. Has you wild eyed and sleepless over how you’re not good enough to love but good enough to fuck. Wondering if one day he’ll look at your desperate attempts to let him in – into your heart, into your bed, into your body – and see someone note good enough for that either. It’s not enough, nothing about you is enough, enough to make him stay. There’s a nebulous expiry date hanging over your head but you are too weak and greedy to do the smart thing and break it off.

You want to scream, to cry, to pound your fists against his stupidly broad chest and demand to know why. Why can he so easily disregard the fragile pieces of your heart underneath his boots when all of you is so ruthlessly consumed by him? It’s not fair. But then he looks at your with those smiling eyes and every angry part of you crumbles. Can almost hear the rubble as it hits the floor when he brushes your hair out of your face and false compliments fall from his tongue. Weak as you are, you steal whatever comfort from him you can.

Refuge, wherever you can find it, is necessary. If you weren’t almost being driven mad by your heartsickness, you would have lost yourself to fear ages ago. Three bodies now, girls that could be you, found in dark alleys. Maybe there’s more of them but the Red Hood has iced you out. Girls with eyes that look like yours, features you could describe with your eyes closed. Same height to them, same width to their hips. You can’t bear to look but you can’t bear not to know either. Jason won’t tell you the truth of it. So you force yourself to look. Check the news obsessively each morning, waiting with the most awful kind of terror from any kind of safety update from the university (too many bodies too close to campus – they have to say something even if it’s only to cover their asses).

You can feel the stares like a physical thing every time a body drops. Whispers behind hands as strangers compare you to the face on their screens. Everyone sizing you up, sizing up your potential to be found dead the next week. It doesn’t matter how many bottles of mace you carry or even that you’ve got one of Gotham’s own crime lords dogging your steps. The judgement lays heavy on you, breaths down your neck until the possibility of it is impossible to ignore. Dead corpse still walking. Only a matter of time before the grave calls you home but not before one of the most dehumanizing deaths the city has ever crafted. You can see it in the way your friends won’t look you in the eyes after every new article comes out. In the way that Dannika holds your hand tight and Lina doesn’t smile so widely anymore. It’s choking, this fear. Your cuticles are a mess and there’s a smooth spot on the back of your pearl pendant from all the times you’ve nervously rubbed it for comfort. Gotham doesn’t feel like home anymore, the alleys and side streets suddenly looming tall to suffocate you.

The GCPD is both horribly inept and terribly corrupt because it doesn’t take long before details of the murders start trickling out to the press in a steady stream. Always taken on a Friday evening. Bodies found early Sunday by garbage collectors. Beaten. Tortured. Mutilated. Violated. The list of adjectives drags on, swimming before your nauseated eyes. It’s not until the fifth girl is found that the last detail is leaked: all of them, every one, had made a single phone call from an unknown number in the early hours of Saturday morning to their loved ones. What it was that they discussed is unclear, but the news anchors all agree it was not a call they made by choice.

The screen fades in and out of focus as you read that particularly gruesome detail, heart breaking in to pieces at the thought of those poor girls’ last words. The ones whose calls got declined out of fear of a scam, the ones whose messages went straight to voicemail because of the early hour. Hysterically, you begin to think about who your phone call would be to. Your parents? You haven’t been on the best terms with them in years, been ignoring your mother’s calls lately because her fear is contagious. One of your friends then?  Jason? But a random murderer wouldn’t know those fine details, would probably just have you pick a number at random, whoever they thought would hurt the most at hearing your voice.

A heavy hand on your shoulder shakes you out of your spiralling thoughts.

“Hey,” Jason says and suddenly you can breathe again. “You won’t be one of them, so stop thinkin’ about the phone calls, yeah?”

You nod – a lie – and chew at your lip. A few months ago your only concern was finishing out the year and getting in to grad school. Now, you don’t know that you’ll ever feel safe again.

Campus remains relatively dead, people too afraid that the killer might deviate from his well established patterns and suddenly attack them at random. You scoff when you hear a couple of freshman discussing it; they aren’t anywhere near the killer’s type, not like you are. But for you, it’s a choice between sitting at home and staring at the walls, jumping every time the pipes rattle or a neighbour slams a door too loudly while your sanity slowly unravels, or this. Putting in extra hours as Professor Llewellyn’s research assistant, haunting the common spaces and libraries for the company of strangers, killing the time that stretches out between the brief moments you can spend with your friends.

You’re early on this particular Wednesday, desperate to get out of the apartment. Danika and Will are the only other ones haunting the student commons with you, Rei and Lina conspicuously absent. With a pang, you try to ignore the awkward silence that lives where Jason should be beside you. It’s quiet, save for the scratching of highlighters and the rushed clacking of keyboard keys as you work. Will’s not the best conversational partner and Dannika seems preoccupied by something. You’re so absorbed by your work that you don’t notice the stranger standing at the end of the table until he clears his throat. You jump and Dannika strangles a scream, knocking her notebook onto the ground. The man stoops to pick it up.

“Sorry,” he says with a grin that should be charming but your hackles are raised. “Didn’t mean to scare you all, I was just looking for my brother Jason. I was told that he’s usually here on Wednesdays?” He slides the notebook back to Dannika and she snatches it up to her chest.

Surreptitiously you send a text off to Jason under the table, unwilling to look away and let your guard down.

You: there’s a stranger here with a creepy smile that’s too wide for his face, says he’s your brother

Jason: that’s Dick

You sag with relief at the confirmation. Dannika takes her cue from you and starts to look at the man (Dick?) with less suspicion and more blatant appreciation. He simply beams under her stare.

Jason: wait please tell me you told him you think his smile is creepy

You: yeah I’m not doing not insulting your brother this soon after meeting him

“So,” Dick interrupts, still smiling that suspiciously happy smile. “Is he coming any time soon? I’d love to meet all of his friends if he’s gonna be a while.”

Will snorts at that you hold back the urge to stomp on his toes.

You: wants to know what he should do

Jason: tell him to go buy chilli dogs at the Batburger and I’ll meet him there

“Jay says to buy him a chilli dog from Batburger and he’ll meet you at the stand,” you say, jutting your chin out to indicate the order window on the other side of the commons.

“Jay, huh?” Dick says consideringly and you swear in your head.

Fuck. You really should know better by now to keep them separate. Dick shrugs and lopes off. The unfair grace must be genetic, you decide.

“So Jay, huh?” Dannika echoes, and you swear again.

“He doesn’t actually like to be called that,” you demure, frantically trying to dig yourself out of this hole before Jason actually does show up.

She turns to you, wraps a hand gently around your wrist where it lays on the table.

“No, no I’m just glad that you two made up. You both seem a lot less awkward around each other now. I’m just happy to see you less unhappy.” Her words are sweet but you can’t help but to clamp down on the wild giggle bubbling up in your throat. Less unhappy. Right.

“Yeah because she’s obviously fucking him,” Will interjects, derailing your train of thought. You slam your laptop closed.

“Oh fuck you too,” you hiss out through bared teeth. “You think guys and girls can’t be friends without sex? Newsflash Will, we’re supposed to be friends and I’d never in a million years fuck you.”

You grab your bag and storm off, shame and anger sparking in your chest and clawing their way up your throat.

“You know, it’s really rude to make comments about someone’s sex life or lack of one...” you hear a voice that sounds like Dick start to say.

You stumble out into the blinding whiteness of the snowy outdoors, squinting at the sudden change in light. Your coat is still slung over your arm but you don’t feel the bite of the cold yet, chest still heaving as an emotion you try not to look at too hard bubbles up inside of you. Why his words had landed so badly with you, well that’s not something you want to cry over in public before you can put yourself back together without anyone seeing. The frozen air cuts open your lungs with each heaving inhale but it grounds you, pulls you out of your racing thoughts and into the present moment.

“Hey!” Dannika puffs out, running into the cold morning air after you. “Wait up!” She bends in half, hands resting on her knees as she tries to catch her breath. She groans and stretches out her lower back, grinning at you ruefully. “Let’s find somewhere else for the rest of today. Will was so far out of fucking line. He’s been such a little asshole ever since he broke his wrist and I know we’re supposed to be understanding that he’s grumpy from the pain but that was just him being mean and neither of us need to put up with that shit.”

“You’re not gonna ask if it’s true?” you ask her, starring at the dirty snow on the ground.

“Well if it was true and you didn’t tell me, I’d assume you had a good reason. And if you didn’t have a good reason but were worried I was gonna judge you, I wouldn’t. But those are all hypotheticals of course.” She says it so kindly that you can feel the first pinpricks of tears in your eyes.

“One of the library group study rooms should be open, let’s go snag one,” you settle on instead of the secret that’s been burning a hole through your tongue.

“Sure! Oh lemme text Jason real quick to let him know we changed spots for today,” she agrees easily and you let out a sigh of relief.

No, sleeping with Jason Todd hasn’t cured any of your feelings for him.

[i-smoke-chapstick]

can you write gotham ozzie x reader?? like, their first time together and all; smut obviously, but with kinda feelings (we respect our emotional short king)

‘OFF TO THE RACES,

-GOTHAM!OSWALD COBBLEPOT X READER-

⋆ 𝐒𝐘𝐍𝐎𝐏𝐒𝐈𝐒 ; Oswald embraces his rather crude interests.

⋆ tags/warnings. GOTHAM!oswald x female reader. SMUT! (with feelings) PORN WITH (some) PLOT! I can’t stop writing oswald smut fics to lana del rey songs. Oswald being soft,,,and a bit rough. He’s a gangster, after all.

♫ “My old man is a bad man, but I can't deny the way he holds my hand / You are my one true love” Off To The Races by Lana Del Rey

You stare at him from across the table. God, you love this place, and you know he does too. His luxurious mansion and a banquet full of food parallel to you.

It feels like home to you two. And he’s been riding on a high ever since the both of you aknowledged your feelings. He still remembers it like yesterday- the way your eyes lit up. The way this feeling of sheer adoration, love, admiration; was reciprocated.

But somethings different tonight. You can’t quite place it. He’s at least eight feet away from you, fidgeting with his cain like how he did before you admitted your feelings to eachother. He’s stuck in his own head, and a blush dusts his perfect freckled face. He refuses to meet your gaze, and in his other hand, he lazily stirs a glass of brandy in his palm. Every now and then, you catch him looking into the swirls of the glass.

It surprised you, how much he drinks when somethings on his mind. Not to mention, he typically didn’t ask you to dinner like this. No, not now that the two of you were dating. This type of behavior was reserved for those flustered days beforehand- not now.

Your almost scared he’s going to break up with you. Let you go. Do something rash. Does he think you betrayed him or something…?

You tap your fingers along the side of the table. The food infront of you has gone uneaten, both of you anxious.

Finally, his blue-green eyes look up- and he clears his throat. He looks at you through dazed, hooded eyes. He’s obviously a bit tipsy from his drink, but not over confident. You almost jump at the sound of him. You cross your fingers and pray for the best.

He stares at you and his eyes narrow, feigning confidence. But in a way, his lip quivers, betraying how nervous he is to speak.

“Y/N. A man comes to a crossroads in his life, and he has to make a choice. Does he choose safety and cowardice, or…does he opt for courage, and risk everything?”

You take a beat as you follow his words. It almost sounds rehearsed. Just what the hell was he saying?

You can audibly hear him swallow.

“A man, ahem, also has…needs. So to speak.” He clears his throat again. “I choose courage. What I’m trying to say is-“ He sucks his teeth, almost rolling his eyes at himself. “The thing I’ve been wanting to ask you all day long is…”

His voice gets caught in his throat like a fish out of water. He continues to stare at you incredulously, almost horrified with himself for not being able to speak. You go to prompt him- before the dots connect in your head. The crimson blush on his cheeks. The fidgeting.

A man has needs.

You let out a loud bark of laughter, interrupting his crestfallen scilence. He immediately looks even more terrified, mouth opening and closing in surprise at your outburst.

“Y/N!” He tries to reprimand you, but it wavers. He’s flustered beyond belief, sure he’s made a fool of himself. “Why are you laughing?!” He weakly demands, a clear expression of dread on his beautiful face.

Through soft chuckles, your laugh dies down. “Are you asking to sleep with me, Oz?”

He’s rendered slack-jawed at the bluntness of your response. He immediately goes to defend himself, as to not sound offensive or vulgar.

“What?!? No-“ He quickly denies, before catching his breath and closing his eyes in a huff. “Yes.” He says quietly through gritted teeth.

It makes you chuckle again, and if his pale skin could get any redder it would. He glares at you now, obviously feeling a bit rejected.

“Okay, well you don’t have to laugh!” He squawks. The grip on his drink is so tight you can see his knuckles go white.

You realize that laughing might not have been the best idea. But you can’t help it. The man set up a dinner to ask his own girlfriend to sleep with him. It’s…sweet. Very gentlemanly. You flash him a smile.

“No, Oz. Trust me, I want to. It’s just…we are together now. You don’t have to ask me to dinner like you’re courting me in the 1800s. If you want to have sex, just say so.”

He’s stunned into scilence, obviously still a bit embarassed. He wants to explain himself. That he isn’t used to this. That he doesn’t want to offend you. He doesn’t want to lose you.

You realize you might have to make all the first moves for now. You quickly stand up from your seat at the table, and he watches your every move like a hawk.

“What are you-“ He goes to ask- before you stand over him. You offer him your hand, and nod.

“Bedroom.” You lower your voice to a whisper. Through utterly confused and stunned brows, he stares at you, before standing up in a hurry. He smooths his suit jacket down and spins his cane in his hand; quickly following you in a hurry out the dining room.

It started painfully slow, his hands messily stripping you of your clothes. His nose bumped into yours while the two of you kissed, his teeth clashing against you in a desperate and needy attempt to be closer. But you knew- every moment and kiss and too gentle peck placed against your skin was all out of love.

He got hard almost embarrassingly fast, and he knew it. But how could he help himself? The woman he loved was about to open her legs for him. You two were going to become one. What could be more fitting for his one true love? The amount of pleasure the act could bring you both had been on his mind for days. But he couldn’t necessarily just…ask for it. For one, it was embarrassing. And two, he’s fairly inexpirenced. That much he was sure everyone could see.

His lips ghosted over every inch of your skin, kissing you like his life depended on it. He worshipped you, eyes widening when you laid bare before him. He took in the sight, mouth agape as he stared intently at every curve of your body. You shuffled needily under his gaze, and felt his cool hand trace a long stripe down your chest to your slit.

You gasped when he inserted a finger suddenly. Without giving you time to adjust, he musters a pitiful “I’m sorry,” in a whisper. Oh, you can see right through him. He’s not sorry at all. He’s been waiting for this on the edge of his seat for the past week, you’re sure. And you’re happy to give it to him. Especially when his hand reaches a spot inside of you that makes you mewl underneath him.

The sound of your wet slick fills the room. You can tell he’s smiling at the sound, confidence finally spurring him on.

He hums at you underneath him, and quickly undoes his trousers in a much less elegant fashion than he had undressed you. No, now all of his moments are hard and fast. He keeps his suit jacket on, keeping himself clothed. You don’t see his cock, but you feel it peirce you in a swift movement.

The both of you let out an embarrassingly loud moan at this. You pray Olga is in a room much farther away.

He buries his face into the crook of your neck, soft grunts following as he thrusts slowwwww. You thread your hands in his hair and trace the light muscles in his back, and you hear him panting. He’s already getting close.

Only a few more seconds pass, before his whole body stills- and you know he’s cumming inside you. He becomes rigid in your hold, his hands grasping at the sheets and your body hard. You let out a yelp at the bruising grip, and feel his load in between your thighs as he slips out of you.

He lets out another series of “I’m sorry”’s, and these are much more genuine. He can’t bare to look at you, finishing so quickly. But you felt so good. So tight. And he hasn’t done… this in a long time.

You gently shush him, and feel him press soft ghosts of kisses to your head. Oh, he’s embarrassed. Let him catch his breath.

A few more moments pass and he’s lifting himself up on his elbows, looking down at you.

Your confused as to why he’s staring until he enters you again.

He places his forehead against your own, eyes closing. He gasps, sweat tainting his brow. You let out a loud moan at the feeling of being stretched out again- you know this must hurt for him. He must be overstimulated beyond belief. Not to mention how quickly he got hard again.

…But you think a part of him loves this. The feeling of his partner clenching around him, the feeling of the walls of your cunt grasping onto his cock. It makes him feel needed. The joining of your bodies and minds. After this, he is yours for eternity; like a dog on a leash. Just as you are his.

Prepare yourself, this is just the begginning. He intends to stay up all night claiming you like this, for many more nights to come.

[mothhball]

Prologue

JONATHAN CRANE X FEM!READER

summary Your mentor is unhappy with your career choices. But her worries only serve to make you more curious.

warnings none! this is just a little prologue

notes a little intro to kick things off. I'll shortly post the first chapter as well haha Also, Potomac is just a name I borrowed from the DC universe. I know it's different in the comics, so don't shoot me please <3

! MINORS DNI !

story masterlist • main masterlist • taglist • kofi word count: 1.1k

“Look… I just don’t get why you wouldn’t want to go back to Potomac. From what I’ve read in your sophomore internship review, Dr. Rabin was genuinely impressed with you and said he’d be excited to have you back for the Senior internship. What happened? I – I would’ve understood anything, really. But Arkham? You really applied there?”

Professor Campbell’s office is a time capsule. A familiar, cozy environment that you’ve been inhabiting for a whole hour per week since the start of the last semester. Decorated with undemanding potted plants and cheesy motivational posters on the walls around you. The smell of paper and hibiscus hangs in the dry air, warmed up to an almost uncomfortable temperature by the ever-running radiator mounted to the wall. Usually, your presence in this room is accompanied by a sense of inner peace. One hour per week during which you’re allowed to fantasize about a glowing future as you sit in front of your academic mentor. But today, the tiny woman with the prominent smile lines is looking at you with thinly-veiled indignation. It’s an ugly expression on her, you decide. People like Campbell are better off smiling and laughing, like the human embodiment of a Golden Retriever.

You shift in your seat, resisting the urge to gesture with your hands to avoid seeming defensive. No, you keep your posture open and inviting on purpose. The body language of a genuine person.

“Potomac Psychiatric Hospital is just not what I want,” you start, speaking gently in an effort to make her emphasize with you. “I need a challenge. I don’t want to hang around rich people with mild cases of burnout all the time.”

Professor Campbell’s face scrunches up with mild displeasure, and you feel the need to quickly correct yourself.

“No offense, of course. But my main interest does lie in… the tough cases. And there are tough cases at Potomac. Jeremiah Arkham himself called his asylum the ‘Ivy League of insanity’. And Dr. Crane used to be a professor here. You knew him, right?”

Campbell flinches, and you could swear you were able to see an expression of genuine fear in her eyes for a fraction of a second. And for that fraction of a second, you were speaking to a prey animal instead of your favorite psychology professor.

“Well… Professor Crane – Doctor Crane was a… well-known member of the faculty. By which I mean everyone knew of him and the kind of seminars he held. Nobody really knew anything about the man aside from his special interest in fear-based disorders and most likely crippling caffeine addiction. Back when I knew him, he was… eccentric to say the least. But he knew what he was teaching about. Students fled his lecture hall as soon as he was done speaking, but he really was a brilliant mind. He was a professor for a reason, after all.”

You nod along to her words, unable to stop that little spark of personal curiosity from growing and festering within you. If everything goes well, you’d be able to witness firsthand how peculiar this man is for the entire summer. Much to her dismay, Campbell’s tales only serve to encourage your decision.

“So, if the two of you knew each other, there’s already a networking opportunity here,” you conclude, folding your hands in your lap.

“Yes but –“

“Also, Arkham is right here in Gotham. I don’t have to rent a new apartment anywhere else, I already know the city, and so on and so forth.” You feel a little bad for cutting her off, but it’s almost ridiculous how much she’s trying to dissuade you from your plans. Campbell doesn’t bother to hide her displeasure anymore, letting out a sigh as she taps a manicured nail against the porcelain of her teacup.

“Listen,” she starts, choosing her words carefully, “we’ve had many students apply to Arkham Asylum for an internship over the years. And those whose spirits didn’t get crushed during the interview were worn down by the work itself. Besides, the influx of applications is monumental. There’s no guarantee that you’ll even get invited to the interview. In my humble opinion, you should write Potomac an email and – “

“I already got invited.” Campbell’s eyes widen, and the silence prompts you to continue. It’s a little difficult to not seem smug as you speak, but you manage. “The interview is this Friday.”

“Friday…” Campbell reaches out for her cup of tea, trying to wash away the bitter taste on her tongue with a mouthful of hibiscus and apple. In that moment, you feel a little bad for the professor. She’s always tried to make time for you and dutifully offered help wherever she could. And in return, you’re acting childish, trying to incite a one-sided contest over an internship. You let out a sigh along with her, shifting in your seat; softening up.

“This is… something that’s really important to me,” you offer, trying to apologize without saying it. “Potomac was a huge help for getting into the swing of things. I… learned a lot about the basics. And for anyone else, that hospital is the perfect match. But I don’t want to graduate, secretly doubting whether I’ll ever be ready for the real work. I know Arkham is a baptism by fire. But it’s what I need.”

Campbell hums in response, stirring a third sugar cube into her tea. It’s just a habit to keep her hands busy at this point. You’re pretty sure the crystals don’t even dissolve anymore.

“Besides,” you continue, smiling at her because you know this will give her at least a shred of hope, “even though I got through to the interview, I might not even get an internship spot. So… this entire conversation might be redundant anyway.”

This gets you the response you were hoping for, and the professor nods thoughtfully as the smile you’re used to returns to her face. She sounds relieved when she answers you.

“If that should happen, I’m sure you could still send an application to Dr. Rabin and he’ll have you on his team in no time at all. Oh, why am I even worrying? You’ll figure it out.”

You nod, feeling in real time how your smile relaxes into something more genuine. Suddenly, the warmth in the room doesn’t feel oppressive anymore. As the mood switches to something more cheerful, the two of you talk some more about your final thesis before you decide to end the conversation on a good note. Campbell rises from her seat along with you, and you mirror her smile, relieved to finally be done with this interrogation. Your mentor heads to the door after you, gently patting your shoulder.

“Let me walk with you. At least until the staff lounge. I need a fresh cup of tea.”

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[brucewaynehater101]

okay so I think I recall an ask here about Jason and Tim who got JJ'd having to work with an alternate Good Joker and it got me thinking about those actor AUs where canon is just a live-action piece of media, specifically this post

So now I'm thinking of Actor!Joker having just left the bar after a good day of drinking, not drunk enough to not get home by himself, only to get non-lethally isekaied into DC

From his perspective, one minute he was walking home, the next he started seeing himself playing the most lucrative role in his career. Dissassociation if he had to guess. He might need therapy

Oh, the Joker he plays is trying to kill him. Self defense it is-- he killed him. well he can't fault himself for it if he never learned self defense now can he :/

Is that a camera? Oh yeah, Joker and loads of his other roles break the fourth wall, and improvisation is expected of him

He looks straight into the camera, the audience, "this is why we don't method act kids. hallucinations" he points at not-him with that final word

"but you all see me pointing at nothing, don'tcha?"

Fuck it, for added humor, the minute Batman gets on the scene & Actor!Joker lays eyes on him, he say "now I'm hallucinating my fiance's role too, what a day," and also Jason and Tim and Duke are there for maximum psychic damage

Hey maybe the three were hostages because the Joker wanted to torment the top three bats he fucked up the most on live television for all of Gotham to see only for Actor!Joker to ruin everything

But also the three seeing this go down through the screen would be funny as shit too

Actor Universe lore; Actor!Joker and Actor!Bruce met through previous roles, kicked off a friendship that became a relationship and soon to be marriage and thats how Actor!Joker met Actor!Bruce hoard of children

this would lead to much of the quote on quote Batfamily Plotline being concieved, through Actor!Joker and Actor!Batkids scheming together to make the most drama-filled superhero story they could

So Actor!Joker and Actor!Batkids would cook up the most gutwrenching ideas, building of eachothers ideas, and cheered eachother on as the Batfamily lore became more and more emotionally devastating

Actor!Bruce can testify because years later into Batman, he still cries fountains of tears when he reads the script and something awful happens to the roles his kids plays, or Bruce Wayne is a shit father

actor!joker: my love, I have propositions the directors will grovel for

actor!bruce: oh no

his kids: daddy I have a new idea for my role >:3

actor!bruce: OH NO!

I think it goes without saying that the actors and characters they play don't have the same name, but I can't be bothered to come up with any mysel lol

Yo!!! This is a wicked cool idea. I dislike Joker/Batman (unless it's the Lego Batman), but I am vibing with this one.

To add on, what if Bruce and Joker became directors specifically so they could sort of adopt their kids? They would be those actors that also direct and screenwrite their own movies.

I want to see Crystal Brown being on set (not necessarily on scene) whenever Steph is, and Bruce and Joker chatting with her when they aren't working. Arthur Brown makes plenty of jokes and pulls pranks on his daughter.

Willis and Catherine cheer on Jason (and sometimes *can't* be on set when certain scenes play out) and smother him in affection after he's done.

The Drakes have their own careers they have to pursue while Tim is filming, but they try to make it on set at least once a week and watch every premiere with Tim. They are good friends with the other parents and only allow Tim to be on set without them because they trust Bruce and Joker.

The Graysons are acrobats in real life as well. Dick wanted to pursue a career in acting instead. They support their son, and he often does performances with them.

Would Damian still be Bruce's kid? If so, I wonder what Joker and Talia's relationship is like. Talia is obviously a fierce but loving mom in this AU. She viciously protects Damian, his privacy, and his ability to stop acting at any time. Damian enjoys acting and being on set with his dad. I also hc that Talia is famous as well. Maybe a model, maybe another actor, or maybe something else. Ra's is the owner/head of a really famous entertainment business. It has branches all over the world, including America.

The Thomases take turns with who's on set with Duke. They both work as well so that a majority of the income Duke makes goes towards his savings or his own spending.

I didn't talk about Barbara or Cass or Alfred or Kate or etc., but feel free to add more!

Actor!Joker would be appalled and disgusted with Batman. Actor!Bruce was playing a role. Yes, the role was somewhat based on Bruce, but he would never harm his kids. He would rather kill than allow them to come to harm.

When Actor!Joker gets transported to that universe, his distaste for Batman is the truly jarring piece of it all. He's not obsessed like their universe's Joker. Actor!Joker shows understanding for their hatred/distance from him. He accepts their boundaries and considers their feelings (in his own very weird way). He doesn't torment. He killed the other Joker.

Just Joker's mannerisms of "whelp, what can you do?" as he murders the other Joker. He still laughs a lot, does harmless pranks, and makes a ton of jokes. Somehow, he does this while lecturing Batman on treating his kids better.

[strdstwanderer]

If Jason Todd really wants to kill the Joker, he should become a prosecutor.

Gotham CITY (emphasis added) makes no sense to me. It is the only CITY in all of DC comics where a supervillain goes to an asylum and not prison. Almost every supervillain goes to Arkham for criminal insanity instead of prison. Blackgate exists. Iron Heights exists. It's so bad that the idea of Bruce Wayne beating up the mentally ill became such a prevalent misconception of the character and Arkham became a shorthand for Gotham's supermax prison.

In the United States, there are four major tests for criminal insanity or not guilty by reason of insanity defense.

The M'Naghten Rule, Irresistable Impulse, Duhram Rule, and the Model Penal Code. Each STATE in the country uses at least a variation of this. Without getting into the weeds of them, the main takeaway is that they test wether:

1. The defendant had a mental illness or defect.

2. The mental illness or defect made them unable to conform to the law.

3. The mental illness or defect makes them unable to appreciate the wrongfulness of their action.

Only a handful of Batman villains fall under these criteria. Off the top of my head, Harvey Dent and the Ventriloquist. Characters like Ivy, Freeze, Manbat, or Bane don't fall into any of these criteria.

Joker does not fall in these criteria either. He knows what does is wrong. He isn't compelled to do what he's doing because of his mental illness or defect if one such exists. If Jason wanted him dead, he could just be a prosecutor and argue against Joker's criminal insanity.

But what about him breaking out?

That's why I highlighted the words City and State. These laws on what defines Criminal Insanity are either in State Statutes or Federal ones. There are no local city ordinances that define criminal insanity because the State legislature controls that. That means if Washington State follows the Model Penal Code, then Seattle applies it the same as Spokane.

Look at every city in the DC Universe. Villains go to prison, never asylums. It only ever applies in Gotham. In some versions, Gotham is across the bay from Metropolis. So, assuming they share a stare, then Metropolis should be sending people like Luthor, Toyman, and Livewire to an asylum too since their laws for what criminal insanity is should be the same as Gotham's (same state and all). But no. Gotham is a legal anomaly.

Jason as an attorney can advocate for a uniform application of State statute. Maybe even convince the State to appeal the trial court's judgment regarding Joker's defense.

One could argue that Gotham is corrupt. Sure. But there's no business sense for the local crime families to lobby for all the costumed freaks to go to one easily-breakable asylum instead of prison. Cobblepot being sent there makes sense in that reading, but Joker?! Plus, we're talking about a whole State, not a just a city. So it'd be unlikely that a handful of Gotham crime families can convince the State to let Joker go to Arkham. Especially if the State can somehow resist Luthor enough to send him to prison.

But how does this kill the Joker? The Death Penalty. Joker would be more than eligible for it. Although, the Death Penalty does take a long time before it gets actually conducted.

I just think it's a lost opportunity not to have a Batman legal drama where Jason becomes a prosecutor hellbent on sending the Joker, and all other villains, to prison. It would give Bruce a moral dilemma where on hand, Jason is doing everything by the books, but his intent is to kill others using the death penalty. What should Bruce do? Should Batman intervene? Should Bruce lobby for the removal of the Death Penalty? Should Bruce provide Joker with legal counsel to combat Jason?

[green-eyedfirework]

“You’re not Ra’s al Ghul,” the figure noted.

“I know.”

“How about,” his throat was dry and his words raspy, “I promise not to scream if you toss me the keys.”

~#~

“Why didn’t you try and kill the bastard, instead of getting your fool head cracked open on the stones?”

Dick turns to shoot the assassin a quicksilver, insincere smile.  “How'd you think I got chained to the bed?”

~#~

“You know,” Dick said, exhaustion tugging at him, “There’s nothing stopping me from warning Ra’s the moment he walks through the door.”

“I could kill you as soon as I heard footsteps,” the assassin remarks, unconcerned, “Snap that pretty little neck.  By the time he can tell the difference, he’ll be too close to escape.”

Fuck.

“Or, you can promise to keep that mouth shut, and I’ll unlock you when I’m done.”  Dick shifts to stare at the assassin.  “Don’t tell me you have any love lost for Ra’s al Ghul.”

~#~

“The Light sends their regards,” the assassin says quietly, and Dick goes very, very still.

“Everything alright?” the assassin asks as he does what he promised and unchains Dick.  Dick warily sidles off the bed, away from the dead body.  “You seem a little tense.”

“I’m fine.”

“Are you sure?” the assassin looks up at him, pinning him in place with that one mercilessly blue eye, “Prince Richard?”

~#~

“What’s the catch?”

“No catch,” Slade shrugs, “I’m a hunter, little bird.  I enjoy the thrill of the chase, stalking my prey as they stumble and falter and finally collapse, mired in the despair of their inevitable capture.”

That smile looks almost wolf-like.

~#~

The weight of hips flush with his own is what makes him freeze, heart rate spiking, his mouth going dry as he braces himself for pain, as panic and dread swirl together in his stomach, no please no having long since gone soundless, there was no point begging if it was never heeded—

The weight disappears.

“I’m not going to rape you, kid.”

It takes Dick a long, fumbling moment to brace his hands against the ground and push himself up.  Slade is back on the other side of the fire, sharpening his knife and glancing idly at Dick.

“And—” his voice sounds like he gargled seawater, “And I’m supposed to take your word for it?”

“I haven’t lied to you so far.”

“You said you’d let me go.”

“No, I said I’d unlock your chains, and I did.  I said I’d kill Ra’s al Ghul, and I did.  I said I’d catch you if you ran, and I did.”

~#~

“So how did the Crown Prince of Gotham end up a prisoner of Ra’s al Ghul?”

“Talia al Ghul,” Dick says quietly, “She broke from her father and fled to Gotham and my father married her.  And Ra’s decided that if Bruce stole his daughter and heir, he would do the same.”  Dick remembers that first spike of panic, past fear, past snarling rage, when Ra’s forced him down and fingers fumbled at his belt.  “And if Bruce took his daughter to bed, then he’d do the same to me.”

“I highly doubt that Lady Wayne is locked up in a tower and chained to a bed.”

“Lady Wayne didn’t try to kill Bruce at least three times.”  Dick pauses, and considers what he knows of his stepmother.  “Probably.”

~#~

Dick stares up at the furious assassin looming over him, and knows that this isn’t a fight he can win.  He’s still breathing through the injuries he got from the gang, and all he can do is curl up and try to survive Slade’s rage.

The cocoon of blankness is waiting like an old friend, and Dick sinks gratefully into it, withdrawing from his body, from the existing pains and what will soon be done to it, and hoping that he still has one to come back to.  For now, he drifts in the fog, untethered and alone.

There are fingers on his jaw, moving his head, a narrowed blue eye filling his vision.  “This a trick you learned with Ra’s?” the voice asks.

“What?” Dick says.  Slurs.  It’s all the same.

“Going away.”

Dick hums an affirmative.  He wouldn’t have survived Ra’s if he couldn’t...disconnect when he had to.  Ra’s didn’t care.

[joe-spookyy]

thinking about batman today so here’s a brief essay explaining my thoughts on every live action batman actor and their films, along with my ranking of the films i’ve seen.

as the original, i have to give adam west some 
serious credit. and god was his movie enjoyable. the bit when he was literally fist fighting a shark and had to use bat shark repellent spray to get it off of him was probably the best moment in batman history. he was very reminiscent of the batman from scooby doo meets batman (1972). or i guess that batman was reminiscent of him. whatever. i was very entertained by his film and i quite enjoyed the addition of robin, as i feel that he goes underutilized in batman movies. i really loved how every single item in his batcave was labeled, and how all of it began with the word bat. the bat navigational computer. the bat water fountain. the bat ladder. i love it. the villains were just the right amount of camp, although i did not care for the fact that the joker clearly had a mustache that was just painted over. caesar romero could you really not bear to part with it for one film? yeesh. my one complaint is that batman did not seem to be enthused about anything throughout the entire runtime. as my father pointed out, he was quite spock-like. not a sweet ounce of real excitement or fear. i really loved how he ran that cartoon bomb all through gotham though. really entertaining sequence.


christian bale does bruce wayne and batman very well, but his batman voice is so funny that it distracted me from anything important that happened in the movies. it sounded like he was swallowing gravel or perhaps like he had smoked a pack a day since he was 2 years old. also, the cowl on his batsuit had a really pointy nose and i did not like that. he had the idea and everything he did was great but the acting choice to give batman such a stupid voice takes away from everything. it left me pondering. did bruce sit in his little batcave practicing voices? do you think he made alfred give him advice on which fake voice was most menacing? do you think he tried different accents? i can’t deal with the lack of answers. however, the dark knight is really good so i will give him that. 


clooney and kilmer did a fine job in the role HOWEVER. i want to track down whichever costume designer chose to give the batsuit nipples and give them a piece of my mind because why. why would they do that. why. it is important to add though that batman forever was one of the most insane, camp, off the rails films i have ever seen and i think i probably enjoyed it more than any of the other ones because i was laughing throughout the entire runtime. it was a batman movie but he was the least interesting thing about the film. the sets were literally breathtaking and so eye catching. the outfits were insane. the plot lines were baffling in the most positive way. i wish joel schumacher had been put in charge of directing every movie ever because i definitely feel like more movies need to be exactly like this monstrosity. cinema peaked in 1995 when they put jim carrey in that atrocious little riddler costume. i almost forgive the costume designers for the bat nipples because of how insane and fantastic the two face costume is. almost. 


now micheal keaton had the right idea i suppose. however he failed to grab my attention. he wasn’t strange enough, nor was he very smooth and suave. he was right in the middle and that made him too much of a regular guy to be a good bruce wayne. his batman voice was literally just his normal voice so that kind of left me confused. how did no one realize that bruce wayne sounds exactly like batman. come on guys. excellent joker though. he wasn’t too serious but i think he could have been a bit more silly. however i’m inclined to dislike him for the fact that he was in batman returns. when i tell you this movie ruined my life i mean it. when danny devito ate a raw fish and black saliva dripped out of his mouth, the image was scarred into my brain and i can still see it so clearly despite not having watched the movie since i was about eight. i did enjoy the penguins with rocket launchers ont their backs, but i cannot get over the awful aspects of this one. i will never forgive you for this micheal.


robert pattinson’s batman, or battinson as i like to call him, was very good. probably i’m biased because of robert pattinson in eyeliner but that is besides the point. his movie was also quite good but it falls into the trap of making batman all serious and gritty. this is a huge mistake. this man named his car “the batmobile” and is literally fighting some guy called “the penguin” and you decided to make it all dark and serious? this has comedic potential and i physically cannot take it seriously when some billionaire in a rubber batsuit is lurking in the background of a serious police investigation. i don’t care who got murdered, the minute he starts growling about riddles from the corner i am going to start giggling. however robert did kill the role and i have to say he did a great job making bruce wayne an absolute pathetic loser, which is what i think the world needs. unfortunately this version of the riddler was so lame and boring. where is the camp! where are the FUN riddles! where is the brightly colored hair! clearly matt reeves has never seen batman forever.


finally we come to the best batman, lego batman. i literally just rewatched this movie yesterday so i think i’m probably an authority on the movie. will arnett understood this role so deeply and it very much shows. this bruce wayne has none of the issues i had with any of the others. the batman voice does not give me secondhand embarrassment for him. the suit has no bat nipples. and most importantly the movie does not take batman too seriously while still giving him an important character arc, acknowledging his flaws both as a person and as a hero, and allowing him to recognize these flaws and begin to overcome them. plus any batman that canonically listens to elliott smith is a friend of mine. something i find incredibly important is that the lego batman movie also does something no other batman movie has done before: it dares to be a rom-com. when batman told the joker “i hate you forever” while they were less than an inch from each other’s faces, i was wiping a sweet tear from my eye. i want what they have.

to conclude i think the only batman movies that really understand the characters are the ones that are truly just off the rails insane. although it’s important to recognize the darker aspects of the character, too many superhero movies feel the need to be gritty and serious all the way through, and the lack of balance leaves viewers (me) disappointed. they need to return to their roots and make the genre interesting and unique again. slightly unrelated but i also really think they need to stop rebooting the joker. there’s been so many different versions and as much as i love the jokes there are other batman villains. so many other batman villains. please let the joker rest i am begging and pleading.

FINAL RANKING!

fuck you batman returns

[ilovetheriddler]

The Carpal Tunnel Of Love.

(Gotham) Edward Nygma/The Riddler × F!Reader.

(Takes place in between seasons 1 and 2 of Gotham. Also, this is my first ever fanfic. So i hope it's okay!)

Word Count: Slightly over 700.

Contents: Unrequited Feelings, just a small bit of Angst.

You honestly couldn't begin to even act like you had any clue as to what Edward was currently up to. Hunched over his desk, scribbling away on numerous scraps of paper... Actually, a concerning amount of paper. You pondered to yourself about what he could be writing down in such a gleeful frenzy.

Originally, you assumed that it had to be some new Riddles he had just thought up. But... the look in his eyes made you think it was something else entirely... He glanced up, finally noticing that you were standing in the doorway. He jumped up slightly startled, unintentionally sending his papers flying everywhere.

He quickly tried to gather them all up while attempting to ramble out a greeting to you.

"A-ah! I'm so sorry that I didn't see you standing there!"

You couldn't help but chuckle to yourself, not in a mocking way like numerous other did when it came to Ed, no. In a more amused and friendly way.

"It's fine, Ed. What exactly are you working on there?"

"O-oh! Um.. It's a bit embarrassing to admit, but I'm currently writing a love letter. Well, attempting to that is."

You felt your pulse quicken upon hearing this, You could practically hear your heart beat pounding away in your ears. Is this really it? Is this finally the moment you've been hoping for? When he confesses his love for you? A genuinely large grin crosses your face in excitement.

"Really?! A love letter? That's quite an interesting thing to be working on... If you don't mind me asking, who's it for?"

An embarrassed and goofy grin rests on his face as he scratches his neck. A bit reluctant to actually admit who this letter is for. But ultimately, he concedes and does so.

"Well.... It's for Miss Kringle, I've had feelings for her awhile now and... I think I'm ready to tell her that!"

You felt your heart both briefly stop and shatter upon realizing what he's saying. The letter isn't for you. He doesn't love you. He's in love with Kristen Kringle.... Oh. Of course he is... you attempt to put up a front of being happy and supportive of him. A fake smile is present on your face.

"R-really? I'm... really happy for you, Ed. You deserve to have someone love you as much as you love them. I hope it goes well for you when you tell her..."

"Thank you... I um... sure hope it does. So anyway, what are you doing down here at the GCPD?"

You felt your face heat up slightly once he inquired about why you were here. You sigh and pull an envelope from your bag, Handing it to him. He looks a bit surprised and confused as to what it's meant to be.

"Open it.... I made it just for you."

"Hmm? Really? Well, alright then. Thank you!"

He tears open the envelope and pulls the card out. It was a clearly handmade card. He opens it and sees the writing on the inside that reads, "You may have a lot of me, but you'll never have enough. There will be no more after the last one arrives. What am i?". A soft chuckle escapes his lips.

"A... Riddle?.... Birthdays, the answer is Birthdays."

"That's right.... Happy birthday, Ed...."

His eyes go wide once he realizes what today is. It's his birthday. He'd been so caught up with preparing everything to be perfect when he confessed to Kristen that it had totally slipped his mind that it was today. After a few seconds, a genuine and wide grin crosses his face.

"You remembered my birthday? Wow um... I don't know what to say, Thank you..."

"We've been friends for two years now, Ed, i couldn't forget your birthday even if I tried."

"Well... Thank you! I really appreciate that you'd go through all the trouble of making me a card. It really means a lot to me that I have a friend who cares as much as you do!"

A friend. That's... unfortunately, all you'd ever be to Edward, you feared. But, a part of you honestly didn't mind. As long as you were able to be by his side and be a part of his life... then I'd be worth it to you. Even if it did tear you apart inside each night that he would never return your feelings, or at least that's what you believed and you weren't willing to risk telling him, especially not now that you knew about his feelings for Kristen Kringle.