#why do they need money they're fucking fruits

[my-thoughts-and-junk]

I feel like stardew valley doesn't stick to its themes in its entirely through its game play elements

[evilminji]

Okay this is going to drive me INSANE. D:>

Dearly beloved, Phandom darlings...

Can DANNY EAT VIDEO GAME/TV FOOD?

I... I NEED to know. You don't UNDERSTAND!? Think about it. No, seriously. THINK about all those HIGHLY unrealistic, too good to be true, PERFECT looking meals. Animated shows n games etc where there are chefs who will "cook for Anybody!"

Now think about being 14 going 20. A teenager. A broke college student. Your fridge is empty and everything you touch? Comes back to LIFE. You're... you're just so hungry. Tired. Your bruises have bruises and you have a paper due tomorrow.

I kinda want to CRY.

Can only eat cup ramen so many times before you DO.

And this show? That commercial? Yonder cooking game?? Well... they did a REAL good job animating it. It looks so WARM. So FILLING and COMFORTING. You can practically SMELL it.

You look down at your sad, soggy, cheap but you can afford it, EZ Noodles and? Feel something BREAK inside. You... you KNOW you can travel inside technology. KNOW this. Have done it before. Why... why AREN'T you? You can't keep living like this.

You gotta TRY, right?

I? Wanna believe it TOTALLY works?? Because Ectoplasm is weird like that? And just shrugs? Says "actual food, the concept of food backed by electricity, what's the difference? Sure, we can fuck with this"? And so Danny? IMMEDIATELY fucking switches his diet.

Like? Dead stop screech, slam on the breaks, u-turn to take that last off-ramp. Type IMMEDIATE.

Grocery bill? No, no, you mistake him! No. NOW it's his "carefully researched for their cooking, games and shows" bill. Touch his collection and he'll FUCKING BITE.

They got sticky notes on the cases. Menus n lil fold out "grocery store" locations. He punched a dragon for this fruit. Mmmmm, home cooked meeeeeals~

Just? Weird Foodie Danny. Yes he DOES know what those steaks taste like. While YOU fuckers were staring at the cat girls bizangas, HE was eating granny cat lady's home made meatball stew! Ha! YOU FOOLS!

More then that? I want him to write reviews. Like "yeah, fight system was OKAY but- *5 hour glowing rant about the food, sounding like a food critic who'd actually fucking gone and loved it* " and people are like?? Who? Is this funky lil madman? This is hilarious?

I want it to be DPxDC JUST? So everyone slowly starts to play the game "Meta or Shtick?" Because no one REALLY knows who he is. This dude gets POPULAR though. For some reason can't be hacked (shame on you guys! Way to try and ruin the FUN!). And like? Eventually? Someone just fucking ASKS?

And Danny is like... " wouldn't YOU like to know, weatherboy?"

So everyone is like:

"Meta."

But hey... since they're already ASSUMING~? >:3c WHOOOOO wants to help him PAY RENT~? Let's VLOG this fucker! Wooooo! Say "hi" Catchef! *feline noises* like? It's like a let's play combined with a mukbang.

Teen Heros everywhere are FACINATED. Game developers are suddenly like? "If there's food. You BETTER make it look amazing. We want that weird YouTube twink to... whatever his powers are, our game! Free viral marketing!" Food channels? Rending their clothes, on their KNEES, please! PLEASE! Just ANSWER OUR EMAIL! Just ONE SHOW! A one off! Guest appearance!

We have MONEY!!!

All while Danny? Is finally happy with his life. Weird as hell. Harrasing the world. Good food on the regular. Gets to travel, kinda. Best of all? He's raising money from it! Can help people! Now... who wants salad?

@babbling-babull @hdgnj @hypewinter @legitimatesatanspawn @spidori @dcxdpdabbles @the-witchhunter @lolottes

[natailiatulls07]

could i request some leclerc!reader and so comfort with charles please

It's okay

Arthur Leclerc Charles Leclerc Lorenzo Leclerc Pascale Leclerc & Leclerc!reader

Summary - In order to find her way in life, Y/n Leclerc runs away in the dead of night only leaving a note

Warning - neglection, running away

-

Growing up with three older brothers and two of such competing in karting competions, life was hard for Y/n Leclerc. Pascale and Hervé invested lots of their money and energy into Arthur and Charles.

When she was seven, Y/n's interest in ballet started. The young girl had her heart set on being a professional ballerina. So thats what she did. Y/n convince Pascale to enrol her in ballet class.

From then on, she became more and more talented. Quickly becoming the top of class. Yet when recitals came round and she was the lead, the only person who came to watch was Lorenzo.

The rest of the family were out at karting competitions cheering on Charles and Arthur. Yes they would apolgise to Y/n for their absence but to her it never really felt quite right.

-

Y/n was 14 years old, life got harder. Karting turned to formula 2 and E. Lorenzo now building his own life, he moved out of the house.

And the worst of all, Hervé Leclerc passed away. This meant attention was limited, Pascale was busy. She had her salon to run, she was running around supporting the two boys racing and she was mourning the lose of her partner.

As much as he wanted to support Y/n during her recitals, Lorenzos life became busier and he could no longer come along each recital. She felt as though no one her family could see her or her talent.

So what did she do? Y/n collected enough money to enrol herself into a ballet academy. In the dead of night she packed just enough and left without a sound. Of course she couldn't leave without leaving a note, she loved her family.

Dear Maman, Charlie and Arthur, I love you all dearly, please don't worry about me. I will be gone for a while, Lo Lo knows where I will be but please do not pester him. Thank you for everything and more Love from your dearest daughter, Y/n xx

-

Y/n Leclerc was a sensation, one of the best of her age. She was a household name, even if you weren't that well educated on ballet you knew who this elegant women was.

However, it was rare for the ballerina to speak publicily, Espercially as many would ask of her surname and family relations. And it wasn't hard to understand why.

"So Y/n please tell me, any relation to formula one driver Charles Leclerc?"

"No comment, thank you"

Charles, Arthur, Pascale and Lorenzo watched on, following her social media through burner accounts not wanting to make this harder for Y/n.

They could see how she spent most of her time dancing, spending time to herself or getting cocktails with friends she made along the way.

~

yourusername

Week in my life...

Spending time alone, you must prioritize self care

Fruit cocktails with friends, the key to my heart

Looking after the minis, they're the cutest little things

Lounging on my sofa after a long day of rehearsals, it is tiring!

Liked by cl_2648749 and 146,283 others

comments are limited

username Gorg gorg girlie

cl_2648749 <3

username I so wanna be her friend omfggg

~

But she wasn't stupid, Y/n knew who those burner accounts were. Every single post, the burner accounts were there front and center. She felt their eyes on her, it was silly really but she constantly felt like they were watching her.

However, Y/n felt warm with that in mind. Like they were finally noticing her for the first time. No longer was she fighting for the attension with her two older brothers. But was it just online? If she were to go back, would it go back to how it was before.

Plus she had built up a life on ballet. Y/n made a family with her friends. Everyone knew her, fuck she is a household name hiding her Leclerc identity from the world, even herself.

-

"I think it's a good idea! It's been long overdue in my opinion"

"No. We need to work to her choices, not make her uncomfortable."

"Okay when?!" Charles throws his arms in the air with frustration. He was pacing in front of the television; Arthur, Pascale and Lorenzo all sat on the sofa watching him.

The topic of Y/n came up in passing by Arthur and it became much more. Charles was fighting, he was desperate to get his dear little sister back home. However Lorenzo, knowing how Y/n felt about everything, was fighting back and trying to prioritize her feelings.

The constant pacing stopped abruptly, and Charles turned to look at Lorenzo with a harsh glare. "Why do you want to so desperately work to her choices? Are you in contact with her?" You could hear a penny drop.

Eyes snapped over to the oldest boy, all confused and harsh. Lorenzo sunk into himself. "I um..." He took a deep breath before continuing. "Yeah um so I kept contact with her yes"

"Is she okay?" The first question Pascale asked. Years of guilt plagued her mind, she neglected her own daughter and she was now paying the price for that.

Lorenzo nodded. "Yes, she's okay...Y/n she um built up a family through her friends and as you know she is doing well for herself..." A small proud smile morphed onto his face, he was proud of her for doing this for herself.

"Does she hate us for what we did?"

He breathed in and out. "No, she doesn't hate any of us...she understands completely..." That did ease some guilt for the other three, it would of killed them to know that she hated them, her own family.

There was silence for a couple of minutes whilst they all fell into their own thoughts. And then Pascale spoke up again. "Can you at least text her or call her whatever...talk to her, please tell her that we love her and that we want to see her again...we're so so proud and sorry"

Arthur and Charles both nodded in agreement. "I'll see what I can do..." Lorenzo promised.

-

It seemed that the next time they would see Y/n would come round much soon than expected. It wasn't planned, totally sporadic.

Charles was in the kitchen, in Lorenzos apartment. He was scrolling through his phone when there was a ring coming from Lorenzos phone. "Lorenzo! Your phone, it's ring!" Looking over the driver read the name.

Y/n

He knew it was wrong to answer the call, but it felt right like this would do something so he did. Charles picked up the phone and answer.

Before he could speak the voice he missed so dear filled his ear, yet it was panicked and he could hear uneven breathing.

"Lo I'm sorry please, I came back to Monte C but uh um the paps they um oh my god I can't breathe they keep following me! Please please I don't- I don't know where to go!" He missed her voice, granted it for much more mature and wiser now, he still missed it.

Though he was entranced by the situation, now very concerned. "It's okay, it's okay" His mind was on speed mode, much like it was in the car. "Send me the location, I'll come and collect you"

Y/n's voice came out calmer and confused now. "Cha...is that you?"

Charles nodded his head before realising she couldn't see him. "Yeah um it is Cha, I'm on my way" He rushed down to his ferrari.

-

Pulling up to her location, his heart clenched. Y/n had grown so much since he had last seen her, she had grown into herself and looked alot like Pascale now.

Charles climbed out of his car, walking over to her and collided her into a bone crushing hug. "Oh chérie, je suis vraiment désolé..." Oh darling, I'm so sorry

Tears soaked his shoulder, the whole chaos of the day and reuniting with her older brother weighing down on Y/n had finally toppled off completely.

She couldn't speak, just hung onto him. That long time spent away from her family catching up to her. "It's okay...it's okay..." Charles whispered in her ear.

-

[princessoflalaland]

I kid u fucking not, im genuinely tweaking thinking about the jjk men, specifically nanami and toji. the complete polarity between them drives me insane.

nanami would treat you like a complete and utter queen. craving something only available across town? he's already in the car the seconds the words leave your pretty little lips. period causing your day to be less than perfect? heat pads, comfort foods, blankets, candy- anything you need will be at your disposable. he's a good listener, affectionate, doting, understanding, mature, he is a MAN.

and do not let him know about your sexual needs. mans will (responsibly) drop whatever he's doing to come satisfy you. put that pussy on his nose, let his tongue trace the insides of your tight, gummy walls, he loves it more than you do. let him drill into that pussy until you're both on the brink of passing out with you mewling his name, how good he is, how deep he gets, how much you love his dick, he loves it wayyyy more than you do. ride him to your heart's content, sloppy licking and kissing into his mouth because you know why: he loves it more than you do. he'll make love to you every night if you'll let him, and I have an inclination you would. I mean, who'd wanna miss out on the sweet vulgarities he'd purr in your ear while he rearranges your guts?

"my pretty girl, takin' me so well." he'd huff into your ear. your legs splayed out near your torso as he has you in your all time favorite position: the wonderful mating press. "ah, God," nanami hissed, face pinching with overwhelming pleasure. "you're squeezing me, baby..gonna make me cum.." he'd lift his head where it was tucked away in the crook of your sweat-slicked neck, staring into your very soul with a dangerous mix of adoration and hunger. "want me to cum inside you, love? pump this pretty pussy f-full of my cum?"

You became his world and whatever his woman wants, she gets, no questions, no debate.

Toji, ohhhhhhhhhh TOji toji toji. He's my guilty pleausre, I swear to you. I've committed my heart, soul, and body, to nanami, I've claimed him as my jjk husband, BUT toji truly is my forbidden fruit. I have to fight actual demons not to imagine him pounding into me from behind, the side, upside down, up into me- in any way shape and form simply because feel like im being disloyal to Nanami :(

(mind you these are fictional men created by a Japanese sadist name Akutami Gege, I need to be committed to a mental institution at this rate)

AHEM, anyway, Toji is a blunt lover, and here's what I mean: (in my head) he may not be the best at communication or very good with his feelings, but he'll do his damndest to be upfront with you. he'll try his best to do what he thinks is best for y'alls relationship and with your help, he gets better at voicing how he feels. idgaf what you gotta say, he. will. spoil. you. yes, keeping money isn't something he's always been good at, BUT that all changed when he got with you. Mans made an entire savings account just for you. his money is your money basically; whatever you want is yours, no questions asked. he'd be your ride or die. no one gets to you without getting through that sexy, delicious, mountain of a man. he'll damned if he lets anyone even think about disrespecting his lady. he'll gladly rearrange their face, maybe even end their bloodline, if they're dumb enough to try. toji is...idk the hood nigga of jjk if u ask me, and if you think really hard, that's headcanon enough.

its one of the undisputed facts of the world that toji has that dawg in him. he will, happily, gladly, proudly, rearrange your insides, then give them a fresh paint job with his cum. he'd talk that nasty shit in your ear too while he's pounding you from behind.

"ohh, this pussy so good f'me, ma. so wet, so fuckin' tight....g'nna fuck 'er nice 'n good, maybe leave a baby in 'er too.” he'd growl, his tip bullying your g-spot at a punishing pace. "you'd like that, wouldn't ya?" he'd pull you back by your hair, keeping your back flush against his broad chest while his rough hand traveled down your navel so his thick fingers could torture your clit. "want a baby fucked into yer tight, nasty pussy. ohh im gonna fill you up baby. fill this perfect, fuckin' pussy..."

the forbidden fruit is toji fushiguro, you cannot change my mind.

this was mindless nanami and toji drabble because I need them, istg im tweaking bc maybe they aren’t so different…

[recuira]

after hours

after hours : a live action buggy x fem!reader fanfiction

for some odd reason, you have no idea who he is. and he fucking loved that.

-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-=-

chapter one

chapter two | red. rain. rotten.

his pov;

She was standing underneath a stripe-patterned banner that shielded her from the pouring rain. Her nimble fingers sorted through an assortment of fruits, trying to decide which were the ripest and tastiest of the bunch. Of course, she was by herself, with none of her peers or family around her. I knew she was close to them. But why must she always be alone?

The tan-suede coat I wore protected me from the cold, keeping my body somewhat warm. My gloves and hands were stuffed in my pockets as I peeked around the corner and watched the girl shop. I noticed her begin to shiver, which I dreaded. I was so selfish. I didn't need this coat. I've spent countless nights in the cold, the crashing waves of the East Blue only intensifying the breeze. I was almost immune to the cold, but her? Y/N's nose was reddening as her teeth shattered. Was any fruit worth suffering in the cold? A devil fruit, maybe. But even then, it wasn't worth it. "Y/N," I smiled as I approached the maiden. The girl's head rose as she picked up an apple then her body twisted, her eyes growing wide upon the sight of myself. She nearly jumped. "How-" She shook her head. "Are you following me?" Her voice and body shook. Yes. "No, of course not," I laughed, brushing the accusation off my shoulders as I took a few more steps toward her, closing the wide gap. "I was looking for something to eat and I spotted you. Am I not allowed to say hello?" Guilt was something I was tremendous at. Y/N still seemed skeptical but after a slight sigh, she smiled and nodded her head. "No, forgive me. I'm sorry. Uh," She turned her attention to the apple she was holding then let it drop among the others crowding in a small basket. "None of these apples look good."

"They've been sitting out for a while. The shop clerk doesn't take the best care of his fruits. It's why they're so cheap," I chuckled to myself and reached down to grab an apple. I twisted it and examined a large brown spot that was eating away at the once-bright red color. I huffed, "I'm sure you can find something else to eat."

"I can't afford anything else to eat."

My eyes widened and I took a step back, visibly and internally shocked. What? She couldn't afford to eat anything other than a rotten apple? "Why?"

"It's a long story," Y/N admitted. "But I don't wanna talk about it." The girl sorted through found one that looked reasonable, and started to dig in her pocket. She pulled out nothing. "Never mind, I can't even afford that." Letting out a pitiful laugh, she dropped the fruit. I frowned. Her absence of money was one of the few things I didn't know about her. And now that I was aware of it, I felt a puzzling and aggressive feeling in my stomach. Was she out of work? Did she not have any way of providing for herself? Raising my hand, I grabbed at my chin and scratched the bottom of it. "Let me buy you something to eat."

"What?" Her eyes widened and she immediately shook her head, waving her hands as a type of rejection. "You are not buying me anything."

"It's just lunch. It's no biggy," I remarked. "At least something small."

"Why?" She folded her arms over her chest. "Do you feel sorry for me? First, you see me getting picked on by some slob, and now, you see that I'm too poor to afford a rotten apple. What's next?"

"Y/N, knock it off. Stop. Just think of it as a friend doing something nice for their friend."

The questioning look remained stuck on her face as she stared up at me. I tried to maintain a serious expression though the look she was giving me made my lower lip purse, like a pout. How was someone so enchanting? I continued to stare into her eyes, making quick glimpses to explore her other facial features before she finally made a decision. "Fine, but just this once, okay?" "You got it." I winked. -=- Being the gentleman I am, I loaned Y/N my coat to wear despite her dismay and numerous declines. She was pouty the entire walk to the pub but I didn't care. I'd rather her in a pissy mood than feeling physically uncomfortable due to the rain. I, however, was shivering. I was starting to become drenched. I held a newspaper over my head in hopes of staying dry but the wind was strong and the rain was forceful, almost piercing through the thin paper.

When we arrived at the restaurant, she found herself a seat in the corner of the establishment, scooting far into the booth. I followed behind her, sitting on the edge of the seat. I'd rather her be sitting across from me than rather to the side but due to her current emotional state, I stayed quiet and slid her the menu. "Get whatever you want, alright? I mean it."

"Are you a man of money?"

"Something like that," I snickered and ducked my head down to examine the options.

"Have you killed anyone before?" Y/N asked as she folded her arms over the table, her eyes peering at me.

I furrowed my eyebrows and let out a soft laugh. "No," I lied. "I'm not like that. I wasn't that type of pirate."

"What kind of pirate were you?"

"What kind of pirates do you think there are?"

"I don't know," She said as she pursed her lips. "I don't like pirates."

I nodded, unsure of a proper reply. I didn't like lying to her. I was fine with lying, in general. I was the master of conniving and deception. But I wanted to be different for her. Maybe a better person, though that seemed a bit rash. I left the East Blue after discovering that Monkey D- or whatever his name was received a higher bounty than me. Double my own, to be precise. My normally high and mighty ego dropped down and was smooshed by a brick. I didn't want to show my face again, at least not for a while. I wanted somewhat of a fresh start. And when I discovered my presence in the North Blue was dim and almost non-existent, I decide to settle down and refresh.

Then I discovered her.

And my plans completely changed.

"Do you know what you're getting?" Y/N's voice interrupted my thoughts and I raised my head and peaked up at her, smiling softly.

"Hm, not too sure yet," I replied.

"Are you cold? You look cold. You can have your coat back, it's--"

"Nah, keep it. It looks better on you," I said with a grin. I reached for a napkin and started to dab at my forearms, trying to dry myself off. The lovely woman aside of me frowned and stayed quiet. I could tell she felt guilty, which, of course, wasn't my intention. So in hopes of brightening up the mood, I decided to tell a joke.

"What's a pirate's favorite type of exercise?"

Y/N smirked and scrunched her eyebrows. "What?" She laughed.

"The plank."

Her hand slapped over her mouth in hopes of keeping her loud giggles and snickers to a minimum but the more she proceeded to think about it, the more laughs she erupted. My face reddened. I glanced around me, noticing that every other patron and pirate were staring directly at us. Gulping, I reached forward and pulled her hand down from her mouth. "Come on, stop. It's not that funny."

"It's stupid, that's why it's funny!" She continued to cackle as she threw herself over the table, clutching her stomach. A smile crawled on my face, not a painted one. Hearing her laugh, while for no reason, was a beautiful sound. And seeing her laugh? That was even better. I rested my chin in my hand and watched her, smiling to myself. When she finally calmed down, she wiped tears from her eyes. Her face was stained red. "Gosh, I am so sorry," She sighed, shaking her head. "I needed that, thank you."

"It's no problem," I said as I dropped my menu.

Due to the lack of laughter, a waiter finally arrived and took our orders.

"I'll have a slice of apple pie, please. With a cup of milk," Y/N smiled up at the waiter as she read off from the menu.

I raised an eyebrow. Dessert?

"Then after that, I'll have the fish and chips. But I want the pie first, please. Not after." She announced and she folded her menu, sliding it forward. She smiled at me.

I looked at her, completely confused. "Uhm," I looked back to the waiter, "I'll just have a cup of coffee."

Now, Y/N was looking at me, confused.

The waiter nodded and left. "Hey," Y/N started. "Why aren't you eating? I thought you were on your way to get something to eat?"

"I'm not hungry. Plus I doubt you'll finish all of that. I might pick on your leftovers," I said with a grin then I started to munch on the small bowl of peanuts that sat in the middle of the table. "What's up with the apple pie though?"

"I like to eat my dessert before my food because that's what I'm looking forward to," She hummed as she leaned back in her seat. "What if during our meal, we are stormed by a group of pirates and killed at gunpoint? Or a sea snake comes and eats us whole?"

"Ha! What?"

"It's unlikely but it's possible. And I'd like to die knowing I was able to get to the good part of my meal." She wagged her finger at me.

"You make a good point there."

"I know," The girl said with a satisfied grin.

I chuckled and sat back, drumming my gloved fingers on the edge of the table. A thought pondered my mind but I didn't know whether to act on it or not. I wanted to, but I didn't want to overstep any boundaries. I felt Y/N and I were moving forward with our relationship if there was one. We were talking, enjoying a meal together. I made her laugh. She admitted a quirk about herself to me. I felt there was good progress. But I wanted more. I was an impatient man. And the fact that it took five months for me to finally talk to her, despite her initiating the conversation, was surprising. I was eager to get what I wanted. And Y/N was the only thing my mind and heart could agree on.

But the fighting halves of my brain finally settled and I rested my arm over the top of the booth, leaning back. "So, uh, earlier you said you needed to laugh? How so?"

"It's a long story," She mumbled, shrugging her shoulders.

"I've got no places to be, I have time," I said as I cracked a peanut open, discarding of the shells on an unfolded napkin. I watched as she began to grow uneasy with the topic but I was desperate to want to know what was the issue. Why was she stressing her pretty little head? I frowned. "Come on, talk to me. We aren't friends, I'm a stranger to you, no? Who am I gonna talk to or tell?"

"You make a good point," Y/N sighed and leaned forward, raising her hand to scratch at the back of her neck. "It's just- I don't know, it's a lot. I haven't talked to anyone about it."

“Why not?”

“Because it’s something I’m not proud of.”

What could someone as sweet and fragile as she has done that was such an awful deed?

“What is it?” I tossed a peanut into my mouth.

“Well, I was young when it all happened. But when Gold Roger announced the One Piece before he died, my dad was one of the stupid pirates who thought he could have a shot at finding it,” She announced as her eyes rolled and she started to chew on my inner cheek. “My mom kept telling him to knock it off and stop living in a fantasy but he set off, determined to find it. I haven’t seen him in fifteen years. But this came to me a few days ago,” The girl dug her hand into her pocket, rummaging around before she pulled out a crumpled piece of coffee-stained paper. She rolled the ball toward me.

I looked at her then back down at the paper ball. I reached forward and grabbed it, raising an eyebrow. Unfolding it, I smoothed the paper against the table and started to allow my eyes to trail over the letter.

‘Y/N,

It is with great sorrow that I write you this letter. I wish you the best in your youth and I hope you amount to incredible things, such as creating a new destiny for you and your mother. I am sorry I wasn’t able to be a better father for you. Greed is distasteful. I won’t see you again. At the time of writing this, I will be long gone. But please, do me one thing: never stop smiling.

I love you, kiddo.

Love, Dad’

I clenched my jaw and looked back up at her. “Damn, that is a lot.”

“I told you,” She whispered as she tore the paper out of my hands, crunched it into a ball, and then shoved it back into her pants. “I didn’t think he’d be dead. Not this soon. My parents had me when they were young. And to think that my dad died doing something everyone warned him of. It’s horrible. It haunts my mind every day,” She frowned, her eyes tearing up. “Do I write back?”

“Do you have things you wish to say to him?”

“So much. But if he’s dead, then there’s nothing I can say, right?” Y/N rubbed at her nose and took a deep breath as she looked up, her hands waving in hopes of drying her tears. “God, I hate crying.”

“Maybe just write your heart out. Say everything you wish you could say to him. Then seal it in a bottle and toss it into the sea,” I suggested. I looked down at my gloved hand and hesitating, I reached forward and took hold of her small hand. I gave it a tight squeeze. “What do you want to say?”

“How I hate him for abandoning me and my mother but I still love him because he’s my father,” Y/N murmured, the rest of her words muffling as her lower lip quivered. She broke down in a fit of sobs as tears ran down her gorgeous face. I swallowed, never knowing how to react when someone cried. As a child, I hated to be touched whenever I was upset. I wondered if she was the same way. “I don’t know, I don’t,” She repeated as she buried her face in her hands.

I looked around the bar, nervous that others were watching this scene. First the obnoxious laughter and now this? Her emotions were spiraling.

“Hey,” I whispered, my thumb rubbing along her wrist. “Let's say we get the food to go and I’ll take you back home. Eat where you feel comfortable and so you can properly feel your emotions.”

“Huh?” She raised her head, the light mascara that accentuated her eyelashes, now dripping down her cheeks.

“I’m going to go tell the chef to wrap your meal up. Then I’ll take you home,” I continued and I raised my free hand, snapping my fingers to signal we needed assistance. “But don’t worry, I’ll turn around when you walk inside.” I cocked a smile but the comment remained unheard as she continued to cry.

I finally found a waiter and instructed him that we were taking the meal to go. He looked at Y/N with a concerned look but I told him she was alright. But I didn't even know that.

On the walk back to her place, I think I managed to get her to calm down. My hand rubbed at her back as she dipped her head in her hands. I guided her through crowds, instructing her on where to go since her eyes were covered and swollen with tears. A small frown fell on my face despite the red-painted smile I wore so proudly. The face paint I wore was smeared and dripping due to the rain from before. It was continuing to rain but not nearly as frequent and hard as earlier.

I had no idea she was this emotional. It made me feel guilty, even though, as far as I knew, I had nothing to do with why she was crying so much. I hated seeing her so sad. Normally, if it were anyone else apart from her, ridiculing would be my goal. I never cry. Pirates don't cry. But my nose burned with an odd sensation as I helped her up the staircase to her small, run-down building. I blinked rapidly and the feeling went away. Letting out a sigh, I gave Y/N a pat on the back and informed her that we were finally home. Her head raised from the confines of her hands and she revealed a wet, red face with strands of her hair sticking to her skin. A frown stayed on my face. I pulled my hand from her back and dropped the takeaway down on the doorstep. I clenched my teeth together and watched as she fumbled to push the door open. "Here," I whispered, using my foot to nudge it open. It gave way, revealing a disorderly room with an unkempt bed and a woman sleeping under the sheets. It was probably her mother.

"Thank you," Y/N finally spoke, her voice croaking. "I appreciate it, honestly. I'm sorry for ruining your meal."

"Don't apologize. Things are fine. Go eat then get some rest, alright?"

"Yeah, okay." She rubbed her nose and nodded her head. "I'll see you around." Her body twisted and she hunched over to grab the uneaten food. She stepped inside.

"Y/N," I started, stopping her in her steps. She turned around. As I dug through my pocket, I pulled out a few berries, placing them in the palm of her hand. "Take these, okay? It's not a lot but, it should last you a little while."

"What?" She looked in her hand, shaking her head. "Buggy, no, I can't accept this. This is too much."

"Come on, take it. It's okay. You need it more than I do."

"But this is like," She counted the bills in her hands, "forty-three hundred berries... Are you completely sure?"

"Yes, I am," I said with a smile.

"I'm going to pay you back for this, I promise."

"No need."

"No, I want to. Please. I won't take this unless you allow me to repay you for this. Okay?" She slipped the money into her pocket, wiped her palm on the side of her pants, then held it out. "Deal?"

Chuckling to myself, I nodded my head. "Deal." I shook her hand. "Now, come on, go eat. I don't want to take any more of your time."

"Okay, okay," The beautiful girl agreed with a large grin, which was a much better sight than her crying. "Buggy, thank you. Thank you so much." And with those words, she stepped back, gave me a quick wave and a sincere grin, then shut the creaky wooden door behind her.

The sound of the door shutting nearly made me jump. And when I realized I was left all alone, the same sensation in my nose appeared. I gulped and walked down the stairs, now standing on a wooden dock. I hugged my arms and my eyes widened.

Y/N still had my coat.

[whohasthecards]

Bradley, Bob, & Jake as Brothers

Just imagining the dynamic if these three because of the Dagger Squad and Mav and Ice began started to bond.

Bradley: An only child who was suddenly given 2 baby brothers.

Goose and Carol's only son, became a Mama's boy

After Goose died, the class of '86 helped chip in to raise him, meaning before they settled in with their own families he got the attention of so many uncles.

Mav of course took the most active role, basically being the father-figure to Bradley after Goose died. Bradley sees him more as a dad than Goose, that's why it hurt so much when Mav pulled his papers.

Then suddenly, the mission happened, they turn into a permanent squadron, and wow is Mav bringing Jake and Bob around more and more.

Hmmm, so Bob's former squadron giving him some trouble? No they're not.

Goddammit, Jake, give that back, right now!

Bradley: Hangman's the worst, selfish prick (Jake ate his leftovers). Some guy: Yeah, the guy's a fucking selfish assho- Bradley: What the fuck did you just say?

Bob: The youngest child given an older brother that actually pays attention to him and a younger brother that he needs to protect.

Big age difference between him and his siblings, he's the baby, was born when his siblings were already teenagers and young adults, focused on their own lives than him.

He was spoiled and loved by his family though, but they couldn't give him a lot of time and attention. His siblings were building their own lives, his parents were getting older, and he was an "easy kid". Bob was quiet, easy to please, easy to ignore.

When he said he wanted to join the Navy, his family was not supportive and doubted his ability. Deeply hurt him.

Then Bradley came, who would actually listen to him. Ruffle his hair and offer to hang out with him. They would play instruments together and stuff. Who defended him against his former squadron when they were making fun of him.

Then there was Jake who loved poking fun at him, but never in a mean way. Who would forget to eat when he was busy or having fun, making him have to shove fruit snacks in his mouth. Who would simultaneously teach and make fun of him when playing pool.

Bob: Come on, Rooster, not the hair (Bob rolled his eyes as Bradley ruffled his hair) Bradley: Awww, you're taking after Jakey, caring about your hair so much. Bob: Well, we actually want to look presentable (scrunches his nose at Bradley's Hawaiian shirt) Bradley: How rude.

Jake: The forcibly responsible, yet ignored middle-child, being given 2 older brothers who are protective of him, and finally gives him the chance to be free.

Jake is the middle child, have two older siblings and one younger sibling. His parents were neglectful, did not care enough.

He and his siblings used to be tight, but due to circumstances falls apart.

His older brother is a Navy SEAL, but suffers from PTSD, when he's on leave, he gets into trouble and drinks too much. He has to bail his brother out a couple of times.

His older sister began to be distant, he doesn't know where she is, she sends money and calls every now and then, but she started a new life. Whenever Jake asks for help, she refuses, claiming that Jake is strong and smart enough, that he can do it. (Jake simultaneously can't blame her and is resentful of her)

His younger sister needs financial support since she's just a teenager, she's in college right now and Jake is extremely proud of her. Just lonely as well. She's doing well for herself, Jake wants to protect her innocence. He acts more like her dad than their dad ever was.

Jake always has to be the rock, steady and strong. He's just tired.

He's a twenty-something, and he wants to be a twenty-something, careless and free. Fuck up and have fun every once in a while.

Then Bradley and Bob comes in.

He can't help but allow himself to play around with them, mess with them, tease them. They make him let his guard down, it's fun being around them, he's not responsible of them outside of being their teammate.

And they actually pay attention to him, and dote over him. He grumbles about them being overprotective or being too much of a mother hen, but he's sad whenever they hesitate to ruffle his hair, wondering if they were overstepping.

Maybe one day, he'll tell them about his family.

Jake (sinks 8-ball in): HAH! I won this game Bobert, pay up Bob (rolls his eyes as he pushes the cup of peanuts towards Jake): Eat up, you mean. Bradley (Ruffles Jake's hair): You gotta let him win once in a while. Jake (pouts): But how will he learn? And plus, how else would I be able to get some peanuts?

[sweaterkittensahoy]

Some financial advice that may be actually helpful

Based on one of y'all (sorry, I'm lazy, I'm not scrolling back) mentioning the terrible advice of "Make six figures."

Like, bitch. I'm TRYING.

But, let's say you live in a shocking world where you don't pull six figures out your bosses's ass every year. How can you make small financial changes that can lead to larger financial security?

These are all utterly subjective and based on things I've either actually done or just observed. I'm gonna try to skip over shit like, "shop for clothes second hand!" because shit like that can require a HUGE time commitment, and it's not even always worth it.

Anyway:

If your grocery store has a free rewards program (you put in your phone number or email address), get that set up. Yes, it will track what you purchase. But it also means when you get coupons in the mail, they're for things you actually buy. In our two-person household, we can save anywhere from 0-15 bucks a week depending on how coupons land.

If you can get a grocery card with fuel points (Fred Meyer and Safeway do it here in the PNW), you can save LOADS on gas. A dollar a gallon easily.

Also do any pet store reward programs that might be available. As the Bean does not require a great deal all the time, her rewards build up slowly, but every few months, we get enough points to get ten or twenty bucks off a purchase.

Do NOT buy in bulk if you're not gonna eat in bulk. Five pounds of rice is great if you eat rice regularly, but if you only have it every now and again, smaller portions of boxed rice are likely a better option. The same is true for any dried foods. Yeah, it's shelf stable, but it takes up more of the shelf. That could hold the stuff you actually eat steadily.

Frozen fruits/veggies are as healthy as fresh. And they'll stay ready to eat a lot longer. Consider that with how you eat and how much you eat a certain vegetable. It may be better worth your money to have three bags of frozen broccoli in your freezer than to keep buying fresh broccoli you forget to use in time.

If you're looking at a generic that says "Compare to BRAND NAME." It's the same formula. That's why they can say that. The reason it's cheaper is because the copyright or trademark costs money. Take that off, and boom. Cheaper cost for the same stuff.

If you have a car, know the way you drive it and how that can affect it. For example, if you do a lot of city driving, your transmission and (if applicable) stick shift are gonna wear down faster than you might expect. It's not always mileage. It's starting and stopping. However, if you drive long distances without stopping a lot (rural areas), your higher mileage car may not need any work on those things. Get your oil changed and your tires checked, and know what to look out for in terms of the kind of car you have and the driving you do. For example, we have less than 100k miles on our 15-year-old car, but we've mainly used it for city driving. We had to get the clutch re-built a few years ago, and last year we had to get the transmission goos updated because they'd run dry. These aren't surprising needs for a city-driven stick shift that's over ten years old.

There's a schedule to big shit going on sale in the US. Mattresses are a big thing around Memorial Day for some reason (Support the Fallen Troops by...fucking???). Electronics go big on sale before school starts and on Black Friday. Memorial Day is also big for cars, as is the 4th of July. If you hand make anything, certain colors of stuff go on sale before major holidays. Orange and black before Halloween. Red, green, and white before Christmas. Pastels before Easter. Etc.

Consider how much use a product will get before you decide you can or can't spend a little extra on it. Do 300-count sheets do the job? Yes. But speaking from recent experience, the 1500-count sheets feel so much nicer, which makes sleeping so much nicer, and I use them literally every single night, so the initial investment works out to basically the same even if I'd gotten cheaper sheets.

But also, stuff like sheets and comforters and stuff go on sale at various times! And your bed ain't gonna go through a growth spurt! Keep an eye out for those deals and scoop up the super soft stuff at a discount if you can!

And lastly on this main list, a very very important thing coming from a former poor kid: Fucking treat yourself. You know how much money you have. You know how much money you need. Maybe it's not hard to treat yourself because you're financially solvent, and in that case, this advice isn't for you. It's for those of us who have struggled to deviate at all from our list of NEEDS to give ourself even a very small WANT because WHAT IF I NEED FIVE BUCKS IN TWO DAYS. I get it. I do. To my bones. And I say fucking treat yourself, and if in two days, you suddenly need five bucks, do NOT feel bad that you got yourself a little something. You can't see into the future, and catastrophizing is so bad for you. Trust me. I know. Just. Remember, in all of this, give yourself a little focused care, okay?

All of that being said, a few more general points:

Dish soap is made to break up grease and oil, and it's commonly antibacterial. This makes it fucking perfect for cleaning your shower (covered in your greases and oils) and your bathroom in general (same reason). I don't recommend it for your toilet, but that's a personal preference based on zero research. The point is, most of your bathroom can be cleaned with dish soap. Get all your stuff off your counters. Make a thin layer with the dish soap. Let it sit for five to ten minutes. Scrub. Bonus: You can breathe the whole time.

Vinegar kills germs. Like, lab-tested kills germs. You can clean your kitchen with Vinegar and Borax (odor-reducer), and it costs a fraction of buying the kitchen-branded cleaners.

Borax is also great as an addition to laundry soap for odor-reducing reasons. So, even the cheap laundry soap is more effective with Borax.

"But Gayle, you can make your own laundry soap if you--" Yes, I know. And it's cool you know that. But it takes TIME to make laundry soap, and time is the only thing less reliable than money when it comes down to it.

Look up "No Buying" options in your area. This is usually a Facebook group or maybe a subreddit. The goal is that no one in the group wants to buy or sell anything. They just have stuff they want to get out of their house. It's not a 24/7 goldmine, but it's a once-a-day scroll through that could lead you to a pricey item for free!

If you have stuff that says "handwash," and you think, "Okay, I want to, but that's a whole new task." Nah. Just take a shower and bring it with! Hell, wear it in if you have to. I do this a LOT. Use the water and your soap (which, as it's likely a body wash or soap, will break down those skin oils and such) and give it a good washing while you stand there. Then, squeeze out the excess water and toss that thing over the shower rod. If you have a drying rack, use it. But if you don't, just leave it where it is and leave the fan going. It'll take care of itself. Just double check the label to know if hot water is a bad idea and if you need to lay flat or hang dry. If you need to lay flat, super squeeze the water out and lay it flat wherever you can.

And, lastly for this long post: If you need the expensive shit, buy the expensive shit. I have celiac and MCAS. My bread is five bucks a loaf. Peanut Butter fucks up my histamines. Almond fucks up my histamines. I need five dollar bread and fucking cashew butter to make a fucking sandwich. But the other option is getting sick from putting stuff in my body my body will fight against, and trust me, those urgent care visits stack up.

[crybaby-spider]

[incorrect quotes with the gang :3]

Mila: Quitting! It's like trying, but easier.

Miguel: But who gets which pencil? Mila: Since they're my things, I get the good one, Noir gets the broken one and you don't get one because fuck you.

Mila: What’s the status up here? Hobie: Fucked up, about to die, Miguel’s a nerd. The usual.

Hobie: I taught your dog a new trick. throws ball Fetch! Dog: just stands there Mila: He didn’t do it. Hobie: I taught him to ignore social conventions and think for himself.

Mila: Y’know, maybe things aren’t so bad. I’m here. I got the nice ocean breeze. Just alone with my thoughts. Miguel: Hey, Mila. Mila: GODDAMNIT!

Noir: Knowledge is knowing that a tomato is a fruit, and wisdom is not putting it in a fruit salad. Mila: That's deep. Hobie: That means that ketchup is a smoothie. Mila: That's deeper. Miguel: ...You guys are idiots.

Hobie, looking over Mila’s shoulder: You can draw? Mila, stopping what they were doing: You can speak?

Noir: Mila, you need to react when people cry! Mila: I did. I rolled my eyes.

Noir: A pessimist sees a dark tunnel. Hobie: An optimist sees light at the end of the tunnel. Mila: A realist sees a freight train. Miguel: The train driver sees three idiots standing on the tracks.

Mila: I hate taking off my glasses, because without them, my vision goes from Full HD all the way down to buffering at 240p and I just can't handle that.

Mila: If I die, you can have what little I own. Lyla: Wait. What do you mean "if" you die? Mila: My unending existence is fuelled by pure spite, that of which the painful experiences of life have rendered me full. Lyla: Lyla: Sighs Let me call your therapist again.

Lyla: Hey, Miguel. Why did the chicken cross the road? Miguel: To get to the other side? Lyla: You were supposed to say “I dunno, why?“ Miguel: Uh... fine. I don’t know. Why did it cross the road? Lyla: To get to the idiot’s house. Miguel: ...Ok? Hobie: Hey, Miguel. Knock knock. Miguel: No. Hobie: You were supposed to say “who’s there?” Miguel: Fine... let’s get this over with. Who’s there? Hobie: The chicken. Miguel: Hobie: Lyla: Miguel: Listen here you little shits-

Mila, carrying a box: What would you say if- if I, hypothetically, came home with 7 kittens one day? Miguel: … Miguel: What’s in the box? Mila: What woul- Miguel: Mila, what’s in the box? Mila: I think you know..

Mila: You’re my best friend, I would do anything for you. Lyla: I want you to eat 3 meals a day and have a decent sleep schedule. Mila: Absolutely not.

Lyla: Wow! Miguel made you cry? Peter B, tearing up: Yes, and they said some really mean things that are only partly true.

Mila: Self-care is suppressing all your trauma until it comes back and hits you in the face with the force of 7 very large trucks.

Miguel: You spent all our money on THIS?? Mila, putting tiny raincoats on ducklings: They live outside. They need this.

Miguel: I could kill you if I wanted. Peter B: Yeah? So could any other human being. So could a dog. So could a dedicated duck. You aren't special.

Mila: Hobie, is that legal? Hobie: When there's no cops around, anything's legal!

Lyla: My favorite thing about big dogs is that when you push them over, they're all like "Oh, I'm lying down now! Someone might scratch my stomach! I might nap! Endless possibilities!" Mila: ...whereas, when you push little dogs over, they're all like, "Vengeance! Death before dishonor!"

Miguel: I keep a picture of all of us in my wallet. Whenever I face difficulties, I take it out and stare at the picture. The Squad: Awwww- Miguel: And I tell myself "If I can deal with these idiots, then I can deal with anything." The Squad: Oh.

[ @peterbsideparker @lyrate-lifeform-approximation @spiderpunkofficial @spiderman2-99 @noir-spider-noir ]

[mackjlee9]

Kenny Rossmore x Male!Reader [Fluff]

part 2. »»»

Masterlist.

We're the Millers

Being the last one to get in, (M/n) closed the door and found a comfortable spot near Kenny, not really interested in anything else other than taking care of his best friend for the whole duration of this trip.

He almost couldn't believe he found himself involved in David's problems just because Kenny wanted to be part of the plan, and then that girl, Casey, joined in as well. She was -somewhat responsible- for everything that happened, at least in the way (M/n) viewed it.

If she had been getting robbed somewhere else, Kenny wouldn't have gone out to help her, and then it comes to the part where, if she hadn't run away from her parents' house, nothing would've happened.

But oh well, it was too late and useless to put the blame on everyone other than David. He was the drug dealer in the first place, he should've known better than to get between the robbers and the girl getting robbed.

In all honesty, he just didn't want to get Kenny into anything dangerous, perhaps he tried too hard. But no way was he gonna let Kenny go, all by himself, with someone like David Clark. Rose might be nice at times, but (M/n) never got along with her... And that was probably because Kenny was, somewhat, attracted to the older woman.

Well, there's no point in dwelling in the past, they're already wrapped in this whole mess. And he's winning fifty thousand dollars out of this job.

David was freaking mad when he heard him, "50k?! What do you need so much money for?! You're just a kid!"

"I need to pay for my and Kenny's university fees, David, so you pay me... Or I'll tell your boss and... The DEA," in the end, they made a deal.

And now, he was stuck in a situation that could've easily been avoided, but Kenny always had that "hero complex", he wanted to help and save everyone but alas it rarely ever worked, he might be over 6 feet tall, but he looks too innocent and naive still, so no one finds him intimidating.

"See? Even this loser here wants to see them!" The sound of Casey's voice caught his attention, and he looked up to glare at her. He was about to get up and make her apologize for calling Kenny "loser", but she started chanting 'fireworks!' over and over again.

And David didn't like that, at all. He stopped the trailer and turned on his seat to look at every one. He didn't pay much attention to what was happening, and ultimately, decided to turn back to his phone, and his music.

After that, they continued with their way, but not without lighting up a single firework that (M/n) didn't bother coming out to watch.

//////

The four of them looked around the place, seeing all the drugs that had to be loaded in the trailer. It was definitely more than just a smidge... They were fucked, genuinely.

"Kenny, (M/n)... Watch the pot," and David left, along with Rose and Casey. (M/n) huffed and crossed his arms over his chest.

"I'm gonna kill that stupid old man..." (M/n) mumbled to himself as they left and got in the RV again, along with a basket of fresh fruit brought in by Kenny, ready to cross the border back to the country. But of course, things weren't going to go smoothly when you had someone like David driving.

They were stopped by a cop, who thankfully accepted bribery but... They didn't have that money, at least not yet, but the officer was open to taking another kind of bribery. And of course, David saw his way out of this whole ordeal, only to have his dreams crushed when he was informed that...

The officer wasn't straight.

"Serves you right, asshole," (M/n) felt Kenny lightly tapping his shoulder, in a way to tell him to stay quiet or not say that about Mr.Clark, but he couldn't care less.

Ever since (M/n) found out Kenny had a drug dealer as a neighbour, he's made it his duty to stay with him and protect him from David, Kenny was too nice to see the bad in others, hence why he got picked on a lot in school, however, (M/n) was always there to stand up for him. It's been that way since they were kids, and he wasn't gonna stop now.

"Alright, Kenny... You're up," David stood up from his seat and took Kenny out of the RV, of course, (M/n) panicked and followed after them.

"Are you fucking serious, David?!" He walked out, screaming in rage, and David rolled his eyes, done with (M/n)'s attitude.

"Yes, I am serious, he can get us out of this mess-" (M/n) stood in front of Kenny, standing up to protect him.

"The mess that you got yourself involved in, so maybe you should go suck mister officer off yourself, instead of asking a kid to do it for you!" Kenny looked back and forth between his best friend and his fake dad, unsure of what to do, "He's not gonna do it."

"I'm not a kid-"

"Then I'm sure you can take his place," (M/n) stayed silent for a few seconds, his jaw clenched as he glared at David, glancing over his shoulder to stare at the police officer, waiting at a safe distance from them, "I doubt you would want Kenny to get arrested because you couldn't do something he could've done easily."

He took a few deep breaths, closing his hands tight in fists, "Fine... I'll do it."

"No, (M/n), you don't have to-" Kenny held (M/n)'s wrist, trying to pull him back, making the (h/c) haired male turn toward him.

"It's okay, Kenny, go back inside-" he glanced at David and saw him tapping his wristwatch, mouthing 'tic, tac' at him, "Just go back inside, please... Casey!" He called for the teen girl who stood by the open door next to Rose, "Don't let him out," while he dragged Kenny back into the RV, he ignored the blond's complaining, saying he could do it, that he didn't have to do this for him, but (M/n) ignored him and turned back to look at David, who had a smirk on his face.

He walked closer to him until they were face to face, and he glared at the old man.

"Make sure you add 10k to the fifty you owe me, asshole," and his smirk was gone, replaced by a frown.

"Depends on how good you do, kid," they began walking closer to the officer, and he could faintly hear Kenny calling for him from inside the RV, "Now, this what you're gonna do-."

"I know what I have to do old man," David looked at him with raised eyebrows but (M/n) didn't realize.

"Hey! What's going on?" The officer came by and stopped in front of them, "Somebody sucking my dick or am I getting a thousand pesos?"

(M/n) looked at the officer and then back at David, who looked baffled at the new word he heard, "Pesos? You are a fucking idiot!"

(M/n) paced around annoyed, watching how David gave a hundred bucks to the officer, who left them be after blowing him a kiss. He felt shivers down his spine and turned around, stumping his way back to the RV, where Casey and Rose had been waiting for them to come back.

He opened the door and walked past Kenny, heading to the back of the trailer and finding a comfortable spot to sit on. A few minutes later, he got bored of his phone and Kenny came in, sitting next to him.

"Thank you for... Taking my spot, you didn't have to do that, (M/n)," he looked at Kenny from the corner of his eye, slowly turning to look at him, shrugging it off as if it was nothing, "Were you really going to...? Y'know, suck him off?"

Kenny's question almost made (M/n) laugh, "Well, my plan was to punch him hard enough until he passed out so we could escape but... Didn't have to do that after all."

//////

(M/n) and Kenny were having fun in the back playing games on their phones together, when Casey came up to them with the Mexican sombreros.

And apparently, there was another RV right next to them, so she was ushering them to come out and be together.

"We're David and Rose Miller," he looked back and saw the three teens behind them, "My daughter, Casey," she leaned over to wave 'hello', "My son, Kenny, and his best friend, (M/n)."

Both of them leaned too, one less enthusiastic than the other, (M/n) wasn't good at meeting new people, he closed off easily in public so he hoped this was the only interaction they were gonna have with this family.

"Oh, it's so nice that you brought your son's best friend! I'm sure they are having fun together!" The lady in the other trailer exclaimed, as if moved by David's kindness, but judging by the smirk on his face, (M/n) knew he was gonna say something irrelevant.

"Well, his parents hate him and they're never home, so we took that role for them," David glanced back at him, ignoring how awkward he made the atmosphere with the unknown family next to them.

"Fuck you," he whispered in response and sat back down in one of the empty seats at the front.

Finally, it seemed like things were going by smoothly, but the car at the front was found with a pot, so now they had to wear their sombreros and smile wide like idiots just to pass as a nice family who came back from their vacation in Mexico.

But well, not everything seemed to be going to shit, seeing how illegal immigrants were crossing the border so the guards had more important stuff to worry about at the moment, so they made their way back into the RV and continued their way.

(M/n) put his phone to charge and sat next to Kenny, thinking of maybe taking a nap until they arrived, when David turned on the radio and Waterfalls began playing. He fixed his sitting position and looked at Kenny, knowing it was his favourite song, and he waited patiently to hear him sing and rap along with it.

Moments like this with Kenny, chill and lighthearted, never failed to enhance his feelings for him. Despite knowing how wrong it was to like his best friend as something more, (M/n) didn't really mind it, he could take the unrequited love any day if it was Kenny.

//////

(M/n) was looking out the window of the RV, lost in thought, completely unaware of how Rose, Casey and David were talking about Kenny, watching him talking to Melissa, the only child of the Fitzgerald family they found themselves camping with.

"She would be the luckiest girl..." The three of them stopped talking when they heard (M/n), watching Kenny with a sad look in his eyes, "He just has to be brave and say it."

David made eye contact with Casey and Rose, who shrugged and remained quiet, "I thought you liked Kenny?"

(M/n) scoffed a humourless laugh, trying to sound cheerful but failing, "Yeah... He's not into guys, believe me, I've tried, so..." He took a deep breath and looked down at his hands, "I don't know, kinda gave up."

After that, the air got a little tense, until Rose convinced David to go out there and talk to Kenny, help him a little and (M/n) stood up, sitting on the steps of the RV as the door remained open, staring up at the night sky.

"Count to three and then do it, because you're gonna overthink it and that... Will drive you crazy," well, that wasn't a half bad advice coming from someone like David. (M/n) watched how the old man got up and Rose walked next to him, stepping out of the RV.

And there was Kenny, making his way back inside.

"Hey, you good?" He stood up and walked in, closing the door behind them and sitting on the empty sofa. Casey was sitting across from them, blasting her music and staring at her phone, "I saw... What happened with Melissa."

Kenny shifted awkwardly, but he noticed (M/n) wasn't looking at him, he was staring at the floor. Then he remembered how (M/n) had dated quite a few people so maybe he could explain to him what he could do, even if he got advice from David, someone his age, and his best friend, would give better advice. Or so he thought.

"Can you help me, (M/n)?" Kenny watched how he froze in place and slowly looked up at him, making eye contact, "Teach me how to kiss-"

He hurried to cover Kenny's mouth before he could keep talking, glancing over at Casey who was still minding her business, even so, (M/n) decided to drag Kenny to the back room of the RV, he didn't want her to hear and make fun of his best friend just because he hadn't had his first kiss yet.

They sat together and after making sure no one was coming with them, he looked at Kenny, a serious expression on his face.

"You want me... To teach you how to kiss?" (M/n) watched how he nodded frantically, licking his lips nervously, something that he didn't miss, although he tried to not make it obvious that he was staring at Kenny's glossy lips, "You know there's nothing I can teach you unless... I physically teach you, right?"

At that, Kenny seemed a little more hesitant, and (M/n) wanted to smack himself because he might've ruined his only chance to ever kiss Kenny, so he decided he was gonna count to three, and then say it. One... Two... Three.

"If you really wanna kiss Melissa I can teach you, it... Doesn't have to mean anything," (M/n) shrugged in a way to appear more nonchalant, but the truth is, his heart felt ready to burst, "We've been best friends for over ten years, a kiss is not gonna change that, Kenny."

"But... I don't want my first kiss to be with a guy," okay, that was kinda painful, but at least he didn't say he didn't want to do it because it was him.

(M/n) tried to come up with an excuse, something easy that could ease Kenny's nerves... Oh, he got it, "Well, we can just pretend it never happened, that way your first real kiss will be with Melissa," he chuckled in a way that seemed real, and he was glad Kenny bought his excuse and was convinced.

"If you put it like that..." Kenny looked at (M/n), seeing how he was patiently waiting for his response, "Okay," he sighed and fixed his sitting position, feeling incredibly tense.

(M/n) noticed and laughed, a real laugh, and turned to slightly face Kenny, placing his hands on the blond's shoulders, "Hey, relax, kissing a guy is no different than kissing a girl, alright?" Kenny nodded and took a deep, shaky breath, his body loosing up and shifting around to face (M/n) as well, "We'll stop when you feel like stopping, okay? Don't wanna scare you too bad."

He didn't want to admit that, in reality, (M/n) was trying to calm himself, he was beyond excited and scared shitless, he felt like he was gonna throw up from how much his stomach was tingling, and it felt like it was stuck in his throat, and he could only hear the sound of his heart pounding in his ears. He was getting dizzy, the thought of getting to kiss Kenny, his best friend, and one-sided love made him extremely happy.

But it won't mean anything to Kenny, while it will be a dream come true for (M/n).

Despite all the experience he's had kissing girls and guys alike for the past few years, nothing could compare to this moment in time, he never felt his way, not even when he had his first kiss.

"Alright, first of... Close your eyes," Kenny squirmed while mumbling 'ah, yes', and closed his eyes. (M/n) could see how much he was shaking, whether it was because he was nervous or scared, he didn't know, all (M/n) knew was what he was feeling as he slowly leaned closer to Kenny, "You ready?" He whispered so as to not scare him, and he watched how he slowly nodded.

(M/n) leaned in and pressed his lips on Kenny's, his eyes closing as he closed his hands tightly, resisting the urge to hold his face and kiss him over and over again.

After a few seconds, Kenny backed away, and (M/n) was scared he might've done something wrong, "That's it?" He couldn't hold back his chuckle.

"Well, that was a peck, not really a kiss..." Kenny nodded and shifted closer to (M/n), "Kenny?"

"Can we do it? A kiss?" Oh my- the way Kenny's voice sounded and how he was looking at him with those green eyes almost made (M/n)'s brain short-circuit.

"S-sure, this is... Me teaching you how to kiss after all, you have to learn..." (M/n) felt himself getting more nervous when he realized Kenny was the one leaning in now.

"Can I try something?" Feeling Kenny's hand gently holding his face sent shivers down his spine, even if his touch was warm against his skin.

Scared of stuttering and letting Kenny know how this whole situation actually affected him, (M/n) nodded, feeling proud that Kenny would want to take the initiative this time around, even if it was at the expense of his poor heart.

And he soon felt Kenny's lips pressed on his again. He took a deep breath through his nose and closed his eyes, relaxing under Kenny's hold and letting him take the lead and set the pace. Although, as he was still learning, it was getting a little messy, so (M/n) couldn't help but let a small smile grow on his face, reaching his hand up to hold to Kenny's wrist, pulling away the slightest bit, their lips gracing and breaths mixing.

"Easy, no need to rush..." (M/n) noticed how rapid Kenny's breath was, and he pressed their foreheads together, "Breath slowly and through your nose, okay? You're doing good."

"Really?" Kenny's voice trembled and for a moment (M/n) thought there might be a possibility of him enjoying his kisses, but he didn't let that thought last, pushing it away where it wouldn't cause hope to rise.

"Really," and with that, Kenny held (M/n)'s face in both his hands, leaned in the few inches keeping them apart, and kissed again.

Their lips moved slowly against each other, and (M/n) tried to prevent his body from trembling at the sensation of Kenny's lips and touch on him, keeping his breathing as steady and levelled as he could while his mind and heart were racing against each other. His mind told him this was wrong and it would only cause him more pain when Kenny got together with Melissa. But his heart...

His heart told him to enjoy this moment they were having together, treasure it and never forget how gentle and sweet Kenny's kisses felt like.

After a few minutes, they pulled away, trying to steady their breathing the best they could, "Was that good?" (M/n) whispered, slightly pulling back to look into Kenny's eyes.

"Yeah..." He mumbled, as if he was in a daze, his sight stuck staring at (M/n)'s lips, "Can we keep going...?"

He almost choked with his spit, but he managed to hide it, and he nodded, "I told you... We'll stop when you feel like it, Kenny."

"Good, 'cause I don't want to stop."

The kisses that followed were more intense, more needy, filled with want and... Perhaps desire, maybe even a spark of love.

Kenny almost didn't want to admit it, but (M/n) was an amazing kisser, and he found himself just wanting more of him- of his best friend, completely unaware of how his thoughts regarding Melissa had completely abandoned his mind long ago. He could only think about continuing to make out with (M/n), enjoying their time without "parents" around.

[contentstarved]

I’ve been a fan of your blog for a while, and when I came back I revisited trigun after a friend had recommended it to me. Honestly I hyperfixated on Vash so fast, I love me some silly guys (who are also sad and need to be comforted because damn)

I saw you mentioned you liked Vashwood in one of your posts, do you have any spare hcs you could share?

HI GUESS WHO LET THIS SIT IN THE INBOX FOR A MONTH AND NEVER ACTUALLY TOUCHED IT FOR SOME REASON. first of all, hi, i fucking understand, i love v.ash so much good lord. my traumatized blonde man who needs so much more help than he allows himself. or that anyone else really gives, but, you know. i'll be pulling a little bit from some of my writing and roleplaying for this so it might be a little softer than canon!

Btw I wasn't sure what kinds of hcs you want, given I'm. A kink blog. But I tried to add in some non kink ones.

W.olfwood generally does not Get why V.ash treats himself like shit, at least not for a while; he has his guesses, but it takes him awhile until V.ash straightup tells him one night that he feels like he has to be useful and helpful to deserve anything, and that's when W.olfwood is really like. Ah shit. I will make sure not to take no for an answer from this point on and make sure he knows he deserves to be allowed to take care of himself even when he's not useful or even if he thinks he fucked something up. Probably even especially then.

Unfortunately V.ash will still skirt the line and undereat, but after a certain point you have to go "something's better than nothing and maybe he'll break and actually fucking eat." Especially with him.

And W.olfwood picks up pretty quick on the kinds of things V.ash likes but is nervous about asking for because... truthfully... the man isn't subtle. Sure, he would eat just about anything, but W.olfwood notices really fast that he's especially excited about salmon, sweets, and fruit, which he never asks for because fruit and fish are pretty damn expensive, but. Look. Sometimes a guy wants to spoil his boyfriend with a massive guilt complex, okay?

In rougher times with less money - or if V.ash is just being especially stubborn - he'll give some of his ration bars. They're not by any means good, but they at least give some respite from the constant hunger V.ash deals with for a little while.

As for some non kink ones:

They are both idiots. Together. V.ash is generally the goofier of the two because he strongly believes in faking it until you make it, but he also has so many stupid things to say and he may very well just die if he doesn't get to say them. It's contagious. I think they're both loosening the other up in different ways here.

W.olfwood also learns very quick that genuine kindness is not something V.ash is used to, and a little scared/intimidated by, and it lets W.olfwood go back a little to being a caretaker. He thought it was something he lost, but the neurotic plant makes him care, damn it, and he's slowly slipping back into being more gentle and loving, at least for V.ash. Other folks might still be on their own. Especially when he sees the thanks V.ash gets for his trouble.

Similarly, V.ash is gentle and close with W.olfwood; even if at first it's just W.olfwood doing his job, they still enjoy each other's company and V.ash... well. He tries to do a lot for him. He wants to help and listen and convince W.olfwood he's not a monster. They're both trying to convince each other of that.

W.olfwood also comes to think of V.ash as beautiful because of his plant features; the feathers, the markings, the sort of strange mannerisms are all a plus for him. If it gets strangely religious at times it's not his fault. It's on both sides anyway.

[flowers-for-em]

this is a two part vent lol (not really lol but you know im taking the edge off)

I've actual never done one of these on here so here goes absoluelty nothing (btw there might be swearing)

part one:

my birthday is coming up soon and we originally had plans to go away and i was super excited, but then my parents changed their plans and said we weren't going away for a few days, we were only going away for one day (on my birthday so that mean travelling on the day) and now they've changed it again and said we can't go away cause they have to feed one of our friends dogs for a few days. I get they're our friends and you want to get the right thing, but they've changed my birthday plans so much, it feels like they aren't putting in a whole lot of effort (for reference one year for my my sister's birthday we went to two different cities doing treetops courses it took a whole week to complete) They're saying that instead of going away for my birthday we'll use the money for when we go away to the eras tour concert which is two days after my dads birthday. So we're technically going away for two things my dads birthday and the eras tour which is for my sister because she is the hugest swiftie (so am i really). And i am super grateful to be going but it feels like they are putting me second to a fucking concert.

And so i babysit a girl on a regular basis its usually just whenever her mum needs me to look after her - im very flexible and things when it comes to that. But they are moving in like a week. So they want me to look after her on wednesday, thursday, and friday. Friday is my birthday and one of my relatives is coming up to visit and another wants to take us all out for lunch on that day. My mum said i'd babysit her on all those days. meaning on my birthday - which i guess i was never alright with in the first place - and when i started to protest and say it would be weird going out for lunch with my family my mother started questioning me and asking why it would be weird because we were doing a nice thing for her mother (because it was her last day of work.) and again it feels like im coming fucking second to someone else ON MY FUCKING BIRTHDAY?? idk its just (i supposed i never really had any high hopes anyway)

part two:

I visited my grandmother today. (she is the one who wants to take my family out for lunch on my birthday btw) It was great to see her we had a lovely catch up and everything. But when we sat down for lunch and she placed the plates in front of us say said this to me "you start with the salad hey em?" and i kinda brushed it off in front of everyone - it wouldn't've been a big deal if she hadn't done this shit before. She constantly makes subtle oh so subtle remarks about my weight about how i sit about what i eat (i could deadass be eating a piece of fruit and she'd say okay maybe its time to stop eating now) Then when she set our "dessert" i guess you could call it - it was just a cheescake she wanted us to try - when she set mine down she motioned to the fruit platter sitting on the table saying "put some fruit on it ems" and that would've been fine as well if she had addressed it to everyone and said it loud enough for everyone to hear. but no it was said to me and me alone. I remember this one time (it was one of the first times i noticed her making subtle remarks) when we were driving to the shops one day and she had offered me like a chocolate covered liquorice bullet. So i took two, so did she. (btw they are legit half the size of ur pinky finger) and she then turned to me and said "you know emma i always only take two of these otherwise it makes me put on weight you know? I like to savour them, just one or two." I was the only one in the car and had fucking taken the same amount as her. When i had come that afternoon and sorta told mum and dad what happened dad just brushed it off saying you know she didn't mean it like that and everything. Mum was a little more understanding saying she understood but idk really. It makes me very fucking insecure when my grandma makes little comments like that. And i don't think i could ever bring it up with anyone cause i doubt anyone in my family would actually understand.

sorry bout the long rants :)

[msfbgraves]

There are whole treatises on immigrant cooking but it's so interesting to do it in real time.

I wanted some noodles with pickled eggs and immediately started the process.

They use a lot of unsweetened soy sauce. The thing is, sweetened soy sauce, as known in Indonesia, is so much cheaper here. And then there was the sesame oil. I have some sesame seeds, but they're hardly a staple, and my local supermarket did not stock sesame oil at all. And then there was the sesame paste, well, fuck it. I went with peanut butter for that. And no, they did not have white sesame seeds.

Unsweetened soy sauce, very expensive, immediately becomes a luxury, so we're doing this with sweetened soy sauce, omitting the sugar, and black sesame seeds. Also peanut butter and some Indonesian crushed pepper paste (sambal). Was it good? Yes! Did it, at this point, have anything to do with the Japanese version? I don't have money to be all authentic, crikey.

Also, Dutch national cuisine is extremely heavily influenced by not having:

Arable land

The climate to grow anything but cabbage, root vegetables or onions (few herbs). Spices are insanely expensive. We stil say that something is 'dear as pepper' (peperduur).

Do you know what we did have?

Livestock. And dairy. Plus beans and some fruits like apples, pears maybe some cherries and forest fruits.

So Dutch meals can only really be flavoured by meat! Fish is somehow a springtime and summer dish, because you need very soft baby carrots and very fresh vegetables to actually enjoy a meal of plain fish - again not even lemon - plus potatoes and some lettuce.

And oh, what if meat is unavailable?

(Not even bacon?)

There's only one thing for it, you smother it in cheese.

Now of course nowadays, you can buy herbs and spices. But still, our people are very bad at making vegetarian dishes, because if you can't flavour anything with meat or cheese what are you gonna do? Buy cumin?! Who has that kind of cash, traditionally?

So you see a lot of meats seasoned with fruits, or fruit served as a side dish. You see a lot of cabbage and kale mashed through potatoes. Why? It softens the taste; cabbage is quite harsh. You also see people basically give up on dinner, really, and inventing really tasty meat and cheesy bites. That does not a meal make, but they're really really good. It does also create a culture obsessed with desserts. If dinner is a bit of a bland affair, dessert can lift your spirits considerably.

A lot of this "White people can't season their food" comes from traditionally not having learnt non meat-based seasoning. We've tried to get by with fruits and the best cheese we could manage.

And sure. I am very eagerly brushing up on other kitchens, because now we absolutely can buy five spice and lentils and ginger. But I'm so much milder about "bad" cuisine or unauthentic foods. People are trying to do the best with what they have available and indeed what they know. Also, learning a foreign cuisine is hard and can be very expensive.

And I've decided that it's infintely easier to cook Surinamese in the Netherlands and Indian in the UK, so I'll cook Gordon Ramsay recipes when I'm there and sweet soy sauce chicken noodles when at home. Also try finding endive outside of Turkey and Holland. It's no use.

[apple-pecan]

Crash Bandicoot (1996)

meet crash bandicoot. he crashes into crates and is a bandicoot. he says "whoa!" whenever he dies. he constantly makes a 😬 face. he has a smokin hot girlfriend for exactly one game. and he's now currently dead because activision owns him and it's a franchise that isnt call of duty or overwatch so it must die. but before that happened, a no name studio named naughty dog wanted to make a mascot for the then brand new playstation 1. and so begins our story.

this game is essentially donkey kong country but instead of moving to the right you're in a 3d space and you have to move forwards. and occasionally backwards if you wanna break all the crates or if you're being chased by a boulder. it works mostly okay but there's a few things that definitively diagnose this game with "first installment syndrome" without even needing a second opinion.

namely, breaking all the crates in a level is a colossal pain in the ass and didn't feel very thought out compared to the sequels. for those not in the know, breaking crates is an optional objective in every crash game where if you break every crate in a level, you get one gem. getting all the gems is the only way to get the true ending; think of the chaos emeralds from sonic except there are way more than 7.

in the first stage, if you know what you're doing, you can easily break every crate and get the first gem. but in the second stage, if you break every crate, it turns out that no you fucking didnt: you missed three you didnt even see! WHAT!!! turns out there are special colored gems you get from stages later in the game that can open up secret pathways that give you secret lives or more importantly, more crates to break. therefore it's impossible to break all the crates in level 2 at the start of the game; it's mandatory to backtrack.

compare this to it's sequel, crash 2: in the first section of the name (the first five levels and the ripper roo boss fight), if you're good at the game, you can get every single gem (barring 1) you're able to get before you even reach the first boss. the way it's laid out in crash 1 makes it feel awkward as you get a punishment screen at the end of the level where every crate you happened to miss falls on crash as they're tallied up. even if, you know, they're impossible to get to where you're currently at in the game.

believe it or not, this isnt the worst thing about getting gems. the first game has this absolutely fucking stupid rule that if you die in a level ONCE, you are locked out of getting the gem for that level until you play it again or restart. and some of these levels are extremely hard AND long. one tiny mistake, and kiss your gem goodbye!!!!! WHY!!!!!! simply put, don't try 100%ing this game unless you're a masochist; honestly the true ending sucks and is not even remotely worth the effort. it's not even canon anyways. fucking hell.

okay thats enough bitching about gems, lets talk about the good stuff. crash is funny. as mentioned before, crash says "whoa!" and it makes me lol. he also has a fun, looney tunes esque design and it's easy to see why he's so beloved. a lot of the stages are pretty fun with surprisingly understated music considering the toony art style. there's not much i'd listen to outside of the game, but it definitely suits the mood. the game feel is mostly good; to this day it's satisfying spinning into a bunch of crates and collecting all the wumpa fruit that drops out. the 1up sound feels very good when you finally get enough fruit to earn one. the jumping feels weird if you have to make precision platforming compared to it's sequels. wait how did that last one sneak in THAT'S NOT GOOD STUFF.

people bitch about the bridge levels, namely the one where you have to bounce off turtles to get to the other end of a fallen apart, decaying bridge, and yes it's fucking awful, but for my money "toxic waste" is even worse. this is where the perspective and camera angles make things way worse. it is a straight path where you must jump over rolling barrels while avoiding the acidy pit; not bad so far, but the second they introduce bouncing barrels the whole stage becomes shit and it hits the fan at light speed. with the camera angle you have, it's impossible to gauge where the bouncy barrels are in relation to you, and they dont even have shadows. i used up almost all of my lives on this horrible stage, and my reward is the next stage being the fucking turtle bridge level.

OOH OOH, also remember the castle level where you have to deal with weird patterned moving platforms for ten minutes with like 2 checkpoints in the whole fucking level? and the god damn darkness level where your mask now lights up the level for a limited time but if it runs out your basically fucked because the stage is pitch black??? oh and dont forget~ if you die even once in these levels you dont get a gem unless you restart and do a perfect run~

WHAT WERE THEY THINKING!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

... uh... despite all this though, the feeling you get when you actually beat once of these batshit levels is great. it's kinda like beating a boss in dark souls after being stuck on it for hours and you finally memorized it's pattern and deal the finishing blow. oh fuck. maybe crash bandicoot IS a dark souls game.

haha just kidding. despite how bullshit it is, crash 1 was still fun to finally beat. i first played the game in 2014 so i dont have childhood nostalgia for the series, and i still had fun. crash 1 is definitely the hardest in the original trilogy, a lot of it for bullshit reasons, but if you want a linear 3d platformer that mostly still holds up despite it's sometimes unfair difficulty, give it a shot or better yet, play the n.sane trilogy remake for modern consoles. in that version you dont get locked out of a gem for dying! unless it's a colored gem. you still have to beat those deathless. and also the jump arc was fucked up a bit so the platforming is even harder. and this is completely subjective but imo the sound design and art style isnt as good. eh, pick your poison.

7/10

NOTE: seriously. the n.sane trilogy removes the howie scream AND the lady and the tramp hyena laugh. what the actual h. whoa.

[wack-ashimself]

I swear some of the bullshit they are saying about Palestine...like, it's SO fucking clear as day lies that they triple down on it, and say things you KNOW nazis used to say.

Zionists are the new nazis. You should see some of the crazy shit they're claiming. Calling Palestinian babies they murdered 'being bred just to turn into militants.' So they have the right, being they are superior. THEY SAY AND BELIEVE THIS LIKE DERANGED LUNATICS. And if you didn't hear: they used white phosphorus. YUP.

I want everyone to survive, but there is an obvious more guilty side: the ones who used WHITE PHOSPHORUS AND SHUTTING OFF VITAL RESOURCES. Holy fuck, people, this is not something to wait and debate on. People are dying by the second. And yes, this and many other things bad have been going on for a while, but THIS is that time where you'll be asked 'did you stop the new nazis?' WHAT WILL YOU ANSWER? 'I went to my job, that supported this broken machine that takes the fruits of my labor, makes bombs, and murders babies.'

Cuz that's what you're doing. It all needs to go. Not a great reset, a grand shutdown of EVERYTHING. It's the only way real change will occur.

And you know that's the truth. I've been here almost 4 decades, and NOTHING you tried worked. This is the only thing that does. Shutting off their fake money machines. Why do you think they're testing how to imprison a lot of us, quickly? Because it's inevitable. Either we choose how to close down and fix this place, OR, it collapses anyways (world war is the only way to regularly boost up your economy...or theft of other's resources).

This is gonna happen. Let's make it on our terms, not the 1%'s.... Water, food, wind/water/solar power are going to be essential. We must plan, accordingly. With neighbors. Like em or hate em, they are more an ally than anyone keeping this circus going. And learn. For fucks sake, keep yourself educated. Not only on what is going on, but on how to actually do shit. Turns out, we don't know a lot without cell phones and youtube walk thrus....

[stylesunchained]

Are we just putting all the blame on a artist who has no control over the venue being cunts and shutting of the vents and refusing to give people water, when the artist themselves was throwing water into the crowd and telling the security to do their fucking job? Or is this just a hate a certain person and feeling like a cunt so gonna blame them?

Let me perfectly clear:

Nobody is blaming Taylor Swift for the death of her fan.

The venue wasn't the issue, it was the production company who made all the mistakes you guys are seeing

NONE of you who are outside of Brazil are getting the ACTUAL facts because you guys rather believe everything that's said on the internet instead of doing actual research

And since I'm here and I'm talking about this, let me make this point so you guys can stfu and maybe listen to reason for once in your life:

Taylor Swift is not to blame. No matter my personal feelings towards this woman, she had no hand in the death of this fan. What she IS responsible for is having the good sense, the empathy and the humanity necessary to help the family who lost that 23 year old girl, who still had an entire life to live and was tragically lost.

Instead of showing herself as an empathic person, Taylor Swift chose to put out a statement so cold it's nearly clinical in which she exempts herself of all blame and of also manifesting any support towards Ana Benevides's family and friends. These are her own words:

What's the point of saying this happened before her show? WHY is she making sure everyone knows it happened before she was on stage when at no point anyone blamed her for this tragedy? This is her PR people who are trying to make her an innocent victim yet again when the VICTIM WASN'T HER and nobody is blaming her. There's another part of her statement in which she says she cannot speak about the girl's death on stage because she's in too much pain - yet another example of Taylor Swift making something tragic ABOUT HER. This is not about her, I guarantee you Taylor Swift isn't feeling more pain than the parents, the friends and the family of the girl who lost her life trying to make her dream of seeing her favorite artist live come true. She sang a song people interpreted was am homage to Ana but refused to say a word or put a picture of her fan on the screen to honor her life ... why couldn't she do that? Why couldn't she show more humanity?

Third of all: the parents have yet to get their daughter's body back because they come from a simple background and do not have the means to pay for the transportation to bring her back from Rio to their city. They have yet to receive the support of the production company, who SHOULD BE BLAMED and should be responsible for paying for all of this, but Taylor - who we all know has very deep pockets and claims to be such a phylantropist - should at the very least reach for this family, who's the one who's actually devastated, and help them pay for Ana's funeral, the transportantion of the body and EVERYTHING ELSE THEY NEED.

Again, I repeat: no one is blaming her. But she was the reason why this girl left her house alive and is going back dead. The LEAST she could do is show some kind of empathy and humanity towards the family who will probably never recover from this. Instead, she let her fans once again gather their already little money to help the family instead of doing something that would show some compassion from her part. Instead, her and her team are being criminally cold and indifferent towards the loss of a life.

All of that is also not helped by the fact that many people in the entertainment industry that I am friends with are telling me horror stories about her and her team's behavior here in Brazil. Not only are her people calling her fans "savages", they're also being xenophobic. She also requested no food from Brazil to be put in her dressing room because apparenly just like Drake she thinks we can't produce something good even though all of the fruit and vegetables she eats in the US are imported from us.

To finish it off, let me say this: nobody blames Taylor. Everyone knows circumstances led to a sad ending and that the lack of planning and structure from the production company also helped this end as badly as it did. Everyone knows they're the ones who should answer to all of this... but why is Taylor acting like this has nothing to do with her and that she can't do something when she claims to be oh so good? Why is she being so indifferent towards this? Is she afraid of a lawsuit? THIS SHOULD NOT STOP HER FROM SHOWING EMPATHY.

[godtears]

The last few days (minus yesterday, I only ate 903 yesterday) I've just barely managed to eat up to 1200 calories and I'm VERY proud of that. And some time last week I managed to just once, for the first time, eat 2000 calories. Which is AMAZING. But it made me feel so sick afterwards, I hated food so much.

I genuinely do not understand HOW you people can eat around 2000 calories a day????????? Do you eat like. Barrels of food? Do you eat things that are like calorie thick somehow? Like. The doctor I saw was like "you should at MINIMUM eat 1500 a day if you can't eat the required 1800-2000" and brother I can't even get that far majority of the days. And if I do get close to 1000 I feel so sick after. Hell, yesterday (Monday) I only ate 903 and I STILL felt sick after. I still feel sick right NOW and it's after midnight (technically Tuesday) and the thought of food feels disgusting. Like. I don't get it. I genuinely don't understand how people are able to eat more than what I can stomach. I feel like what I eat is a normal proper amount, since it makes me feel comfortable. But then I tell people what I've eaten and they're like "Dude wtf are you starving yourself?" and its like no I'm not!!! Why are you saying that!!!

I'm just baffled. I don't know what to do. But like!!! No one fucking believes me!!! Because they look at me and see that I'm fat and assume that I'm lying and that I overeat. That is such a bad problem that one of the doctors I saw gave me a hunger suppressant despite saying OUT LOUD "now I know you undereat BUT" like LADY if I'm UNDEREATING then WHY are you giving me a HUNGER SUPPRESSANT?

I don't know why I'm fat! Okay? I do everything I can to exercise anywhere from 30 minutes to 4 hours a day. That includes walking, carrying things, squats, bends, stretches, dancing, stairs, carrying things ON stairs, etc. I used to do PARKOUR as a kid and would be seen walking and running around and climbing trees for up to 12 FUCKING HOURS.

My diet has always been as healthy as I could make it despite not having a lot of money growing up. We were lucky to have family who grew their own fruits and veggies and would give us some. I only really ate fresh foods. I rarely really ate any junk growing up. I don't really like eating junk all that much now. Majority of my diet is vegetables. I eat small amounts because larger amounts make me sick. Sometimes I can manage bigger amounts, but at a cost.

So like. Why am I fat?! "oh PCOS makes you fat" okay but EVERYONE I've talked to says that even though I have PCOS I can still lose weight with diet and exercise. I took metformin to help with my insulin resistance from my PCOS. And the doctor told me "oh you lost 10 pounds! But you're not gonna lose any more. You're stuck like this forever." but WHY?! The only time I genuinely lost weight was when I would go without eating for 1-2 days at a time. Do I need to do that again? Like fasting? I don't know! I don't understand!

I just feel so miserable being like this. I can't fit into clothes I like. I can't fit into any of my clothes anymore. I can't really buy new clothes easily. No one takes me seriously, especially not doctors. I get harassed. I get stared at. I get judged. I get bullied. I can't do things normal people can. Fuck I'm asthmatic because of second hand smoking but people are blaming it on me being fat and bully me for being asthmatic! I can't be "queer enough" cuz I'm fat. Transphobes use my weight as an excuse to call me an "ugly predatory man". Someone told me that my daughter was going to kill herself because of how fat I was. I black out sometimes and people have brushed it off as being because I'm fat. I live with someone who constantly makes me feel worthless for so many reasons including because I'm fat. I can't live like this anymore.

I don't know what I'm doing wrong.