#why do they keep doing him dirty

[mama-qwerty]

That's it. I'm rewriting the Wade scene.

Sonic 3 spoilers

“The Master Emerald is being guarded by a fierce warrior, trained by my own hand!”

~~Meanwhile, in Green Hills~~

Wade Whipple, deputy sheriff of Green Hills, warrior-in-training to Knuckles, the last of the Echidna, and current bowling champion of the Green Hills bowling league, ages 35-50, stood at one end of a kitchen island, arms crossed over his chest.

At the other end of the island stood Callie MacPherson, head librarian of the Green Hills Public Library, personal tutor to Team Sonic, and current record holder for ‘most letters written to the editor of the town newspaper’, most in response to the minority of townspeople voicing a very loud outcry against the local alien children. (She just can’t help herself.) She also stood with her arms crossed.

They both stared down at the large green gemstone sitting on the middle of her island counter. Wade had brought it over, almost in a panic, as he asked for Callie’s help with it.

“Okay, so . . .” she began, her brows furrowed. “Walk me through it. One more time.”

Wade uncrossed his arms to rub the back of his neck. “Okay, so Knuckles left me in charge of the Master Emerald while they were off on their camping trip.”

“The same Master Emerald that can turn thought into reality, and what let Robotnik build that giant robot out of all those other vehicles that nearly destroyed the town, and the boys,” she said, keeping her eyes on the gem as though it would leap off the counter and attack.

“Yeah.”

“The same Master Emerald that let Sonic turn into . . . I dunno, some kinda glowy superhero.”

“Actually, I think that was something different? Like, there were other little gems inside and those changed him?”

She flicked her eyes up to him. “So what happened to those?”

He shrugged. “Knux said Sonic sent them away, but I’m a little fuzzy on the details.”

Her gaze fell back to the gem on her counter. “Uh huh.”

“Anyway, I was being a good guardian, like he wants me to be, never letting the thing outta my sight,” Wade said, gesturing with his hands as he spoke. “I kept it with me the whole time.”

“Right,” she said, before pointing to it. “So it’s in a bowl of rice because . . .”

“I dropped it in the shower.”

Her eyes flicked back to him. He held his hands up. “Hey, I wasn’t doing anything weird with it! It was just a little greasy after I took it to the movies. They really put a lot of butter on their popcorn.”

Callie rubbed her temples. “Wade, I really think Knux just wanted you to keep an eye on it, not date it.”

“He said never let it out of my sight, and that’s what I was doing,” Wade said, standing a little taller. “I wanna make him proud. And when it got wet, I remembered what I had to do with my phone when I dropped it in the punch bowl at the last Christmas party. So I put it in rice.”

She shook her head. “I really don’t think the principle’s the same, here.”

He shrugged. “He said it’s the key to ultimate power. And if something with power gets wet, that’s bad.”

Callie opened her mouth to say something else, but ultimately closed it again. She had no idea how magic gemstones from space worked, and letting it sit in rice seemed harmless enough. “Okay, so what do you need my help with? You seem to have it covered.”

He rubbed the back of his neck again. “I dunno . . . I guess I just wanted some company? Being a guardian to something so powerful and special is kind of a lonely job.”

She gave him a look. “Wade, they’ve been gone for like two days.”

Another shrug. “Two guardians are better than one, right?” She cocked an eyebrow, and he sighed. “Oh, c’mon, Cal. All we gotta do is make sure no bad guys show up to take the Emerald and used it in ways it was never intended. How hard is that?”

She was about to answer when a blast of wind hit them, and Sonic appeared in the kitchen. The two humans jumped in surprise, giving almost identical little yelps at the sudden appearance.

“Hey, Sonic!” Wade called, giving him a little wave. “Didn’t expect to see you here! How’s the camping trip? Were you surprised by your little b-earth-day thing?”

Sonic didn’t smile or wave back. He stared at the gemstone, brows pulled into a deep furrow. “I need the Master Emerald.”

Callie blinked, and exchanged a look with Wade. They’d never heard, or seen, Sonic look so serious. So angry.

“What’s going on?” Callie asked, moving closer to the boy. “What’s happened?”

He turned to look at her, and she stopped dead by the look on his face. “Tom’s hurt, the world’s in danger. I need the Emerald. Now.”

Alarm bells sounded in Callie’s head, and a quick glance at Wade showed he thought something was up, too. They both moved to block the Emerald from his view.

“Slow down,” Wade said, holding a hand out in a placating gesture. “What happened to Tom? Is Maddie okay? Where are Tails and Knuckles?”

Sonic turned to Wade, his lip curling in a snarl. “I don’t have time for this. Give me the Emerald.”

The deputy flinched at the hedgehog’s look and tone, which only further solidified the idea to Callie that something was very, very wrong.

“Sonic,” she said, trying to keep her voice gentle and even. “We want to help. But you have to tell us what’s going on.”

His snarl became more pronounced, and in a blast of wind, he’d zipped behind them and snatched the Emerald from its rice bed. He stopped at the kitchen door, looking back at them.

“No time.” Sonic lifted the Emerald above him and in a whirl of wind and flash of light, he transformed, his fur turning golden and eyes red. “I have to end this.”

And with that, he was gone, a strong burst of wind making Callie’s kitchen rattle and shake with its strength.

As her things began to settle, Callie looked over at Wade, who looked equally shaken.

“Think Knux’ll be mad at me?”

She stared at him for a moment, before looking back out where Sonic had gone.

[ketchup-chup]

What if I made a post about how Reborn is actually super observant and a really great communicator? What if I made a post about how Reborn's closed off nature and attitude is a deliberate choice on his part and not because he's emotionally stunted or unable to communicate his feelings? What if I said he's incredible at reading people, and providing guidance to his students and to the others outside of his "spartan training" or being a strict tutor? What if I said he's very capable of being a comforting and kind person (look at how he treats Yuni at anytime or the girls, especially during the future arc), and if he doesn't act this way it's for a reason (either because he doesn't want to comfort them (lambo) or it wouldn't be beneficial to their growth to coddle them (Tsuna)) What if I made a post about how Reborn isn't as simpleminded or one note as people write him?

[sonnburntskies]

Oh no, the more I think about Fadel & Bison being born upper class, the more I'm questioning why they were basically kidnapped so easily.

Even if they had no other family members to look for them, when anything happens to rich people, law enforcement and the media act like it's a national emergency (anyone remember OceanGate???). But Lilly snatched up those nepo-babies as though they'd never even existed!

You know who would have been way easier to steal with basically nobody noticing? Lower class kids with no one to look for them.

Reverse Hitman AU where Lilly takes Kant, Style and Babe instead of Fadel, Bison and Keen.

Kant and Babe would be so easy to kidnap. Their parents are already dead and kids get lost in the foster system all the time.

Or, if one wanted to keep the element of Lilly killing the parents, she could have either orchestrated the plane crash or used it to pass the hit off as a tragic accident when in reality she poisoned them before they even got on the plane.

Kant has already been shown in canon to submit to the wills of authority figures and he was willing to break the law to support Babe financially. A young and impressionable Kant could be manipulated into killing if it was for his brother’s safety.

Babe wouldn't be as useful to Lilly right away since he'd literally be a toddler, but she could look at him as an investment. The future, perfect hitman that she could mold from infancy who would be loyal only to her. In the meantime, he'd make for excellent insurance to hold over Kant's head to force him into compliance.

Style's mother has already died of cancer, and the loss causes his father to ‘shut down’ for a time. His dad is deeply grieving and works in a hazardous profession. Lilly could make it look like an industrial accident or even suicide over the loss of his wife to get him out of the way.

Style does have a list of relatives who would notice him missing, but from the outside it would just look like the death of both his parents drove Style to run away from home. It's unlikely any extended family members would have the resources to look for him, let alone take care of him. The police would just label him as a runaway who'd come back on his own eventually, so they could quickly write him off rather than waste resources looking for him.

Style might be harder for Lilly to control, since he's an unpredictable loose cannon and a pacifist at heart. But in the show, Style goes along with Kant's scheme even after he learns the truth because his greatest weakness is his fierce loyalty. All Lilly would have to do is encourage the family angle and get him attached to Kant and Babe for him to fall in line, following her orders as long as it's for their sake.

Style is such a good actor and a smooth talker, he would be great at schmoozing the marks and getting their guards down. And well, we’ve already seen how weirdly comfortable he is holding a gun.

Her perfect hit-men candidates. Children who fell through the cracks of society. Children who no one would miss.

[moonamite]

Real talk why’s his mouth got the texture of a freshly shaven pussy.

[bonefall]

I see you've changed Shadowstar from being first to die. Sneaky, sneaky. You sly.. cat, you, Bones. Was that on purpose, out of spite for Shadowstar's Life?

B'aww, you got me <3 Yeah I hate that book.

Shadowstar: *breathes in public*

Erins:

[creature-phases]

Who and why did someone put Tim in this fuck ass suit after debuting one of the sickest Robin costumes I’ve seen

[louismygf]

just recently watched this is us with my college friends

[daz4i]

the way ppl talk abt dan heng sometimes is insane to me like. how can you misread a character this badly. i know you don't always need to take everything a character says at face value but smth that comes up again and again not just as smth he says out loud (which, i should also mention, he says to the audience or as a random gameplay voice line rather than a piece of dialogue that other characters can hear) but also when we hear his inner thoughts isn't the same sorry. like why are we ignoring the plain text here 😭😭😭😭😭

[ourimpavidheroine]

Mako and Bolin set off towards Penquan Island in the Fire Nation to find answers to a case—and maybe a little bit of their past along the way.

When a strange missing persons case falls into his lap, Mako is forced to choose between his job and doing what he feels is right! An upturned room and an unhelpful witness aren’t promising starts to the investigation, but when his brother Bolin comes across a surprising clue that ties their own mother to the case, the pair embark on a journey to the small, rustic island of Penquan. The island’s inhabitants seem to have things to hide, and the brothers are determined to get to the bottom of it—even if it means uncovering uncomfortable parts of their family’s past.

[lunastars21]

Everyone in sonic community: angy at Ian because The End is dead, gone, kaboomy

Me: Angry Because BARK WOULDN'T GIVE FANG A GIFT ON HIS BIRTHDAY, IM NOT ACCEPTING THAT

[victorborkowski]

listen i get why people love seven oh seven but holy SHIT do you have to be so brutally mean to jumin to get onto seven's route ....... i hate myself rn. holy shit

[aberooski]

Okay so, if y'all know me you know I adore tmnt. It was my obsession before I ever watched even the original YGO much less GX. And now I'm watching tmnt 2012 for the first time, I'm about halfway through season 2 and honestly you guys are so lucky I'm not live blogging it because well.... I don't like it 💀

I will say I'm enjoying season 2 more than season 1 so far but still 💀

[mrs-mikko-rantanen]

HOW DARE YOU TRADE YOUR CAPTAIN????

[lolliepops-rox]

maybe it's a good thing that when i was 13 my type wasnt sopping wet alcoholics yet, cos could you imagine if i was obsessed with Tony Stark.

Anyways. Anyone know what the fuck is wrong with Tony. (I want him)

[cathnospam]

“I didn’t shave—“

“I do not…give a fuck. Open your legs.”

You and Bakugo have this argument at least once a month. You only need to wax your little lady once a month after your period , and it’s about that time to do so but you have 2 problems;

Your appointment isn’t until 2 more days, and you have a boyfriend that has been waiting a full week to eat you out.

“‘Suki I told you I hate—-“

“Why do you give a fuck about that? It’s HAIR.”

“I FEEL DIRTY.”

“You just took an everything shower.”

Bakugo NEVER understood the point of shaving your pussy anyway. He genuinely does not care whether there is hair or not on it, and after having an irritating crave to eat your pussy he definitely couldn’t care less.

“It’s a bush.”

“I don’t—- y/n the area I wanna suck—“

“Don’t be a pervert.”

He deadpanned at you, the Blondie also never cared for how blunt he was with his dirty words. Just two weeks ago you and him were eating cereal when he just casually spoke, “When I get home tonight I wanna eat your pussy against the door like I did last night.” As he gets up to clean his bowl.

No emotion

And no care.

He’s a damn savage.

“Your clit don’t have hair on it it’s just the lips.”

“OMY fucking—“

“Please.”

You blink, “what…”

“Don’t make me repeat myself.”

Bakugo groans loudly and lays his head on your shoulder. And bites it, “OW!” The main reason why Bakugo haven’t let up is because you and him established a strict safe word rule. He knows he can be pushy with things he wants but he’d never want to make you uncomfortable about it. If you GENUINELY don’t want him to all you have to say is “TNT” and he’ll drop it no questions asked. And never bring it up again.

But here you are, contemplating.

Your thoughts get broken by a soft kiss on your jaw, his scarred warm palms lifting your his shirt , playfully tapping his fingers on your clothed panties, “I heard you playing with yourself in the shower.”

You freeze, feeling his devious smirk against your cheek, his natural scent and musk clouding your mind as he keeps kissing you, rubbing on your body, “You want it as bad as I do. I fucking know you do.”

“Remember last time?”

He had your knees to your ears last time, ass hanging off the edge of the bed as he spit, licked, and sucked all inside and on your pussy. His fluffy hair tickling your inner thighs, his thumbs pressing into your skin so deep you could just barely grind against his mouth. Bakugo was always a nasty ass eater to the point you were embarrassed just watching him.

His ring and middle finger swirling circles on your clit as his tongue filled your aching tight hole, the way he stops for a moment to kiss the soft little nub , nearly making out with it making you roll your eyes because his pillowy wet lips felt soooooo good against you.

You remembered how he’d slap your ass a few times when you looked away for too long or covered your mouth, you swore he’d heat up his hands slightly just to do so.

You remembered how he’d hold your ankles up and he licked stripes against your pussy and his tongue teasing your other hole.

You remembered how he’d swished his head back and fourth while his lips captured your clit and tugged on it. Sending you over the edge while he sucked and groaned. Two fingers pumping inside you.

“You remember, huh.” His raspy voice against your ear, already teasing his fingers inside you panties, “You came so much you passed out right after.”

The more he spoke to distract you the further he got, eventually laying you down on his huge couch, to pulling off your panties, to opening you legs, to kissing each thigh, and down to repeating his exact actions from last time.

And no he did NOT care about the hair.

[arminsumi]

Betting your girl's mouth on a basketball game was crazy — and Suguru was all for it.

After taking a loss that may or may not have been deliberate, jock!Suguru wears a dirty grin on his face while watching you suck his best friends virgin cock like a good girl, loving the nasty wet noises you make while slurping up and down nerd!Satoru's pulsing shaft, slowly stroking himself to the sight of you on your knees, making cock disappear in your mouth like magic.

And Satoru — the poor boy — is losing his mind because he's never felt a woman's lips around his dummy big cock before. He used to tell you that sex is beneath him — now he's throwing his head back, gritting his pearly whites, curling his toes and biting his bottom lip 'till it's all red, totally surrendering to your little mouth — it's just so funny to you, 'cause he's been the know-it-all bastard telling you "... you're just Suguru's slut. If you paid as much attention in class as you did to my best friend's dick, maybe you'd amount to something. Do you even remember what we learned yesterday? Exactly. But I do — that's why I'm the top student and you're just — "

Bla bla bla... Satoru's now showing you how much precum his dummy big cock leaks — it's a sticky mess oozing out of his tip all over your quivering tongue. You looked up at him and winked, and he seethed inside because god he's hated you for so long but now your lips are wrapped around his cock and your mouth is taking him to heaven.

He's whining, biting into his fist, knees all wobbly. the texture of your tongue drives him nuts — then it clicks. oh, this is why my best friend is obsessed with his girlfriend. This is why he can't shut up and stop oversharing his sex life with me.

'Cause heaven really does exist on her tongue.

"fuck, slow down..." Satoru tries to ease his cock out your mouth, feeling his orgasm threatening to erupt at any moment.

But Suguru pushes you back down on his cock, filling your cheeks again, "nah, keep going baby, he's gonna cum — aren't you Satoru? You're gonna cum in my girl's mouth, huh? Come on, big boy, I know how long you've wanted this. Fill this little slut's mouth with your cum."

Those taunting words push him over the edge. His heavy balls tighten up as he feels you suckling his swollen head, and then white ropes come bursting out.

"Ahh—gh! Fuck... nn!"

Satoru's legs give out and he moans like you've never heard a man moan before, releasing all the cum he's worked up for you like he's been waiting years to do this. Actually, he has been waiting years — waiting patiently to find an opportunity to make your jaw ache and eyes well up with tears.

"Baby, you gonna swallow my best friend's cum f'me?" Suguru encourages, stroking his cock lazily against your cheek now.

He watches you compliantly swallow Satoru's seed, and Satoru twitches at the sight.

Huffing, Satoru comes down from his high and brushes his white wispy bangs out of his eyes. He's glaring down at your mouth.

"... still fucking hate you... " Satoru mutters to you in a voice still shaky with the after-effects of his orgasm.

"I still hate you, too." you smile back at him.

His heart flutters and bottom lip twitches. He can't stop staring at your lips, your eyes, your hips, your thighs.

"Ah, Satoru, quit your act — you're the one who proposed this idea in the first place."

You went red in the face. It was Satoru's idea? The mister goody-two-shoes, know-it-all, all A+++ report cards, 'sex is beneath me' Satoru?

"Huh? I thought this was your idea..." but before you can express your surprise you're already feeling Suguru nudge his cockhead against your lips.

"Sh sh, now it's my turn, baby. Open wide."