#why do i even live here there's no point | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

lbhslefttiddie · 3 months ago

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im so fucking mad. why did i work so hard on this. there isnt even a single gay bitch in this image all i have is latticework and osmanthus studies

#arts #mottau #i mean i did enjoy drawing it. but also what the fuck #this is even sy's actual room yet this is a concept design for a room he will get later #like this is vaguely something i started drawing to conceptualize certain aspects of omega room design in this setting #but like at this point i could have explained more in three regular sentences #due to the potency of an omega's scent particularly in their living quarters certain aspects of their rooms are specially tailored #to contain their scent to the more personal parts of their living space. one could think of it as degrees of intimacy #with their bed area being the place their scent is allowed to fully saturate the space. the room divider here encloses the furniture needed #for dressing and whatnot as well for similar reasons and the curtain falling over it mimicking the canopy of the bed serves two functions #partially trapping in the scent and also adding an additional layer of 'hiding' to the nest area which makes it feel more secure #see? three sentences. that took five minutes to explain #i mean certainly the art looks niceys and all but im just so fucking perplexed. why did i do that

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is-the-owl-video-cute · 7 months ago

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Iran is bombing Israel apparently, FAFO moment truly.

Both Biden and Trump are vowing to defend Israel with harsh military force against Iran.

If they follow through with it and the US moves against Iran, this will actually become a war.

Do not stop pressuring politicians to support Palestine. Do not stop advocating for Palestine. Do not stop protesting Israel. Do not stop protesting genocide.

From the river to the sea.

#Why do I have to live in a country that’s always on the wrong side of history #Why are both candidates on the ballot this election war mongering freaks #can these old white men just both get a fatal stomach ulcer and go septic #surely there could be literally ANYONE ELSE #I would rather vote in a literal dog #but no I have to choose between a far right conservative and trump who wants to wage war with Mexico and China AND iran now #Great #anyway focus on the other seats on the ballot this year everyone #Biden and trump are legitimately identical on half of their stances I truly cannot tell who the worse one is because they agree on everythi #frankly at this point I’ll just vote Biden because the trump voters are actively dangerous when he’s in power #they are either way but he has a lot more power over them during his presidency #but since both Biden and trump love to abuse immigrants and support genocide #there isn’t even a lesser of two evils here #it’s solely a matter of keeping the trump cultists in line

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moiraimyths · 3 months ago

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Before we call anon rude because let’s see it from their perspective, imagine getting an entire feast to eat. That can be pretty hard to start with so much that’s going on, but if they start with one thing they know they’ll like (aka one character they like) that can be the start for them leaping to other characters to finish the story and the bigger story. I struggle the same way to start book series if I don’t have at least one character that drives me to read it, it’s all about what can be the hook to push them through. Sounds like the anon is neurodivergent (just a guess) so they might genuinely not see it as rude and see it as a solution to even play the game to start with.

Btw absolutely adore the game, the complex and rich characters making them all so unique is amazing. The art is so pleasing to the eyes I love it!! I’m waiting for it all to get out at once so I don’t get too impatient. Shae however interests me the most, which routes will have the most lore for them? Will there be routes that give more lore in general based on decisions you make or do they all share the same amount? (I mean general lore not just Shae lore)

Apologies; we are not trying to accuse any asker of being rude! We are simply explaining our perspective as the developers / are trying to broadly encourage folks to dip their toes into other areas of the story outside of the main route(s) they're interested in, especially considering some routes will be made available sooner than others, and these other routes will likely contain additional scenes/lore of everyone's fave(s) regardless! We want to give each main cast member an equal amount of love (and lore) regardless of their overall popularity, so our goal is not to tut-tut anyone for having strong preferences for one character over the others, but rather to explain that you may be surprised by how much *more* you learn about your preferred characters in the other routes. That's all!

For Shae... Well, they were a foot soldier for one of the worst periods of the War. Lore wise, any other story that touches on the War will likely have content relevant to them and their experiences. ^^

#ask #clotho answers #edit/final note: we got a *few* asks on this subject and will not likely answer all of them for the sake of our followers' dashboards #but we also want to note that part of our encouragements here come from the fact that Flan/Keagan are our most popular characters by a lot #and we want to do what we can to gently nudge folks who may not want to romance the fem / nb characters into checking out their stories #despite not being into them romantically. this is half of why we have platonic routes to begin with #we recognize veterans to the dating sim world may feel less inclined to romance characters that don't align with their irl orientations #this isn't a bad thing. some people steer clear of dating sims altogether because they're aro or just not interested in romance stories etc #but the unintentional side effect of this is it has a chilling effect on developers even in the indie sphere to make less diverse stories #if Flan and Keagan are our most popular characters then they will be our most *profitable* characters in the long run #and as much as we would love to not care about money and just produce the story we want to tell #we live in a society (tm) and need to eat #if at the end of ndm's development we see that 90% of our engagement went toward the boys it is hard to ignore the financial incentive #to redirect our energy toward leaning into the 'tried and true' formula that assures we can buy groceries and make rent #basically what i am candidly saying here is capitalism is pretty bad for creative liberty unless you're already rich / able to self finance #which we are not. and currently none of the core devs make *anything* from ndm #it would be nice if it does turn a profit but that isn't a guarantee - which the team has accepted as a normal risk in game development #anyway this is getting rambly but the Point is that this goes beyond us wanting to make sure all sides of our story are equally appreciated #it is *partly* that - we do want players to experience the entirety of our artwork #but it's not just for our egos - it's so we can keep making art like this #i considered including this in the body of the post but money talk suuucks man #and i don't want anyone to think we're glaring at them in a holier than thou 'ah-ha! you don't want to play maeve's route because she's a #woman!' sort of way because i think that's a reductive way to look at things #people like what they like and there's nothing intrinsically wrong with that #but if you like that we're making a diverse story #with masc routes fem routes and nb routes #even if you don't personally want to romance x or y #it would help us if y'all play the platonic routes #we are trying our very very best to make the fem/nb routes interesting for Everyone so those stories don't get sidelined #and if you don't like them for their own sake - fair enough! can't win em all and we'll deeply appreciate that you tried anyway!

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everyryuujisuguro · 4 months ago

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#ryuji suguro #ryuuji suguro #ao no exorcist #blue exorcist #suguro ryuji #suguro ryuuji #manga ryuuji #bon suguro #chapter 63 #shimane illuminati arc #i really like this moment and how ryuuji's standing here to quietly guard the door and wait for his moment to go in #he said he'd check on them and it's heavily implied he heard izumo's full breakdown and shouting match #it's likely he heard it at least #their two arcs get a lot of compare and contrast #but i think it's vital to understand that the two of them are coming at their arcs from opposite places #ryuuji goes into his upset because no one will let him in while demanding that he trust them and believe in them when they've shown #they won't do the same with him #rin wants him to trust him blindly but won't repay that trust with his own in them #even to the point that they don't know he can't tell them because he didn't even let them know his father was dead or a problem at all #he's upset at tatsuma refusing to take any responsibility and refusing to talk and refusing to explain why he pushes ryuuji away #and when he does find out the karura story he pushes to be included and leaned upon #he wants most of all to help and be a support to people he cares about #to the point he feels like a failure if they don't need or trust him #he doesn't even know how to live without being needed #izumo is the opposite #she has refused to ever let anyone close enough to need her ever again #because the people who she did hurt her and were taken from her #and she won't let herself be that weak ever again #she despises being needed and pushes against it #she wants purely businesslike relationships

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icewindandboringhorror · 1 month ago

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I occasionally wish to reach out to old friends/acquaintances I haven't spoken to since high school/some other even earlier time in my life, but I have SOOO little social energy even for required tasks (like making dr phone calls or etc), I never have any leftover for extra ones, and it would be very odd to message someone I haven't spoken to in like 5 years out of the blue but then take 4 entire months to respond back lol.. My natural curiosity with nostalgia/collecting details of the past/etc. (literally if I were born a little earlier I would definitely do scrapbooking or something lol) is very strong, but, alas, not strong enough to beat out the Social Issues Demons apparently

#facebook always does that 'here's a post from this day 8 years ago' thing. and I see old comments interacting #with people and it's so like.. OOOOO~~ where are they now?? what's going on? how much have they changed as people?#how much are they the same? this is fascinating. i should contact them!!' but then it's like... take that to it's logical conclusion though #you would contact them and then IF they even responded it would take you 80 years to respond and then they would #think there was something wrong or that you were trying to be insulting or something. To contact anyone I need to include an 85 page #disclaimer of all of my social issues & mental illness things. 'If i take 3 weeks to reply I promise it has nothing to do with u' etc lol #THIS is why more people need to be into phone calls/voice calls/some form of audio real time communication/etc.#I think one of the main things that's hard about messaging through text for me is it's so unscheduled and open ended #(plus it takes forever if you're talking about anything in detail and gets very long very quickly)#because like you can send a message and then just get a reply whenever. and then you're expected to reply back whenever #so it's like you never know when the response will come or when a new obligation to reply can come up? so it's like this sudden thing with #no outline?? if that makes sense. whereas a phone call is very like 'hello let's schedule a call from 10am - 2pm on thursday'. And you know #EXACTLY when the interaction will start and EXACTLY when it will end and you can plan around it in your schedule easily.#I have the reverse thing of a lot of people (how people don't pick up phone calls/hate calls/only text)#I would literally talk on the phone with a stranger. I would have a discord voice chat with someone I barely know.#if someone I hardly even remember from elementary school asked to have a voice call with me out of nowhere I would do it.#but if a stranger MESSAGED me?? or someone I barely know sent me a TEXT or something?? I will never reply probably #It's just too vague and weird. and you can't read voice tone over text. and the interaction could last forever with no clear end #point and etc. etc. But a call is like. set. established. clear boundaries. you can read the flow of conversation better. rapport. etc. etc #I get that I guess people feel more anonymous or distanced over text?? but you can have fake phone numbers on the computer. or do like disc #rd calls. or zoom without a camera or etc. etc. Also the distance that's present in text is BAD distance because it just means that tone is #not conveyed properly and you will never truly get a sense of the person's conversational vibe or mannerisms or how well you really click.#ANYWAY ghgjh...... I'm so so so interested in concepts of like.. How did that one kid I used to talk to in elementary school #but then they moved away in 5th grade - how did they end up? what are they doing now?? etc. etc. Like despite the severe social anhedonia #and general lack of connection with others I'm just really fascinated in like.. idk. the human development of it all and like #the concept of how we're actually a million different people through the course of our lives ever evolving in different iterations and etc.#PLUS again. i love nostalgia. sometimes old peple you know might remember a shared memory or can tell you about something you forgot #or etc. like it's SUCH A COOL THING in CONCEPT but I am too socially inept generally speaking lol. which people I still talk to today are #familiar with my 'phone call once every few months' communication style. but strangers would just be like... wtf. And I don't blame them #Sure I literally cannot change the physical health + brain issues i have - but also I know enough to not put others through that lol

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demigod-of-the-agni · 3 months ago

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Forgive me, forgive me. I ask, I beg, I pray, but it never comes.

You know I find it incredibly bewildering to see just how much kalki reflects myself in him like YEAH Duh of course he does, he’s my little guy it’s like his full time job. But at the same time he is a fully functional facet of my being and he is at the mercy of my whimsies, and whatever he discovers in his arduous journey of self realisation is ultimately a reflection of what I discover in the real world. It’s also incredibly funny because ffxiv lore for dark knights is really baked into the idea of (re)discovering yourself amongst the bloodshed and continuing to live and love and thrive despite the world working against us. who would have thought such a raw message could come from an mmorpg side quest about edgy emo boys of all places

also adamantite armour of fending i would lay down my LIFE for u

variant + phone bg version + ID below the cut

tch as if you guys are actually going to use artwork of my little guy as your phone background. i know. how dumb. let a girl dream. i should make an alternate version but it's of Fray and Myste

[START ID: A picture with a red background focusing on the character's bust that is placed to the left of the image's centre. He is coloured with a dark blue overlay, contrasting with the red background. He has brown skin, long black hair that falls over his shoulders, and is wearing blue and gold armour and earrings. He is looking at the viewer, right eye dark brown and the left an glowing unnatural red, with an expression that looks determined and angry and yet bitter and forlorn. In the foreground and on the right side of the piece, a miniature version of the character stands coloured in a light blue overlay and wearing the same blue and gold armour, looking as if he is glowing. He is facing towards the left of the piece, or perhaps at the character bust, his expression unreadable. Above the miniature character's head is the symbol representing the FFXIV dark knight, coloured in gold. END ID.]

#the burst of creativity that shot through me is indescribable. i can only hope this is a sign that i am FINALLY out of art block #but OF COURSE my creativity comes back right when gamsat is around the corner. it's always a fucking exam. i fucking hate myself #maybe this piece is supposed to be vent art at how I CANNOT MANAGE MY SHIT AND I AM JUST. NOT DOING THINGS RIGHT. NOT DOING THINGS RIGHT !!#and i tell myself it's fine but maybe it's NOT fine? i told myself i'd work on it but nothing is getting worked on #nothing productive at all. not even for uni nor for myself. nothing is happening at all. it's just going through the days #waking up. wishing i'd slept more. stare at my laptop for hours. youtube. watch 10mins of lectures. then a nap. then the laptop. then sleep #but i dont and it pisses me off because nothing is working. i'm like if linguini lost his rat and i'm staring at the kitchen catching fire #maybe go to class if it's on for that day. scrambling notes together. pretending i DO have my shit together #i COULD put out the fire. but i'm not. i could and i can but im not. the extinguisher is in my hand. fire's not going out. i'm still here.#maybe. maybe that's why drk resonates with me so much. at the end of the day. maybe i am just a stupid bastard #-who can't get their act together. who actively shoots themselves in the foot and bleeds all over the place trying to make something happen #only this time- this time the perpetrator isn't someone i can point at and demand answers from. it's me hi i'm the problem it's me #and i can- i SHOULD find a way to make this all work. to make this whole Living My Life business work. but the extinguisher's in my hand #wow okay that was really heavy anyway uhhhhh TAGS TAGS TAGS TAGSSSSS #ffxiv #ff14 #ffxivwol #ffxiv wol kalki #ffxiv dark knight #artoftheagni #and the fire keeps going #tw eyestrain #cw bright colors #idk the red is really bright and it;s nice for my eyes but idk for anyone else

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freakurodani · 27 days ago

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if you firmly established a boundary and you have mentioned that it bothered you when they didnt follow through, then they ignore (or ""forget"") again, are you allowed to be a petty bitch then?

#conspiracy lvl: text #just like dont let me be surprised that someone i dont know is gonna be in the house!! i think thats common courtesy but what do i know #i dont even care that shes HERE I just gotta prepare mentally for it #and at this point i AM prepared im now just upset that he hasn't done HIS part #its the principal now and i dont trust him and i dont wanna be around him and i feel resentment building and im MAD #because i COMMUNICATED #and thats so HARD #ive done MY part why cant he do HIS #ive got confirmation that my ask isnt like. insane even!!!!#bare fuckin minimum #i wanna spit on him #he wants me to meet his gf and i never will out of spite now.#not formally #i didnt introduce myself out of spite #shes gonna think im a bitch but i could be putting him on blast about how he doesnt respect the ppl he lives with so

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hecksupremechips · 8 months ago

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Shinjiham is cute when it’s romantic but tbh I think i vastly prefer the idea of them being best friends instead. Like, neither of them really saw it coming and weren’t really looking to get another best friend (Shinji has Akihiko, Kotone has Junpei and Yukari respectively) but it happens anyway. Kotone takes a liking to Shinji much faster than she does anyone else and I’d say a big reason is just the fact that he’s so reserved that it allows Kotone to do most of the talking while he just listens and they love this arrangement cuz Kotone doesn’t get to talk about her own interests very much. Though I think some of her needs to talk to Shinji stems from this insecurity that he isn’t happy in the group and she has this people pleasing problem and wants everyone to be happy so she makes a much bigger effort to talk to Shinji. And it’s very unfortunate because Shinji intentionally acts cold and distant because he doesn’t want to form any attachments because he wants to die soon, but aaaaaaaagh dammit this girl just keeps talking to him and being sweet and encouraging him to engage in his interests and share them with the others and he just can’t seem to say no when she’s got those damn puppy eyes. And Kotone is just able to get him out of his shell by being persistent but not in an overwhelming way, she’s very cheerful and supportive of him. And Shinji is able to offer her support by encouraging her to talk about herself and by making sure she’s taking care of herself. They just click really well and make such a positive dent in each other’s lives and it’s all about basic acts of kindness going a long way you know?

#persona #persona 3 #kotone shiomi #shinjiro aragaki #i uh. probably didnt do much here to prove that their relationship is best when its platonic akjsks i mean idk how to convey it #that these two are just so good for each other but that im just not feeling it romantically #and why should i honestly like cant a guy and a girl just be platonic soulmates like me and jackie aljsks #plus i just have other ships with these characters i like better ahem akishinji and mitsuham yall already know #and i just feel really comforted by their relationship being best friends cuz it makes the pocket watch a lot more power of friendship #and it just. irks me the idea that its romantic love that saves shinji and its romantic love that gave him a will to live #cuz first off you can save him without romancing him and also like if you think kotone is the only person he wants to live for #youre just wrong like in fact its very clear in his social link that he feels this strong love for everyone #its literally like why other characters are so ingrained into his link he loves everyone and they love him back #its just kotone who organizes the time for them all to get together plus like idk when ppl say shinji only wants to live after romancing #kotone its like. well hes not gonna have a good time post coma then huh #and i suppose the point being made is he has to learn to live even if his gf isnt there but again like. shes not the only thing he has #idk i just hate this like pedestal romantic relationships are put on and i hate the implications that like #akihiko has been trying for years to protect shinji and his love doesnt matter cuz it isnt some heterosexual romance #grrrrr it just irks me is all and yeah i just think theyre besties who do everything together #kotone is like shinjis emotional support animal that guides him through the scary crowds and shinji is off putting enough to scare away the #meanies that come their way and they have a dress up montage and make cookies

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selfinflictedgunshotwound · 4 months ago

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sorry for only saying this type of shit lately but i kinda wanna drive a car straight into a brick wall at the highest speed possible

#trying to keep it together so bad because i already know the problems and solutions and whatnot but i cannot do anything #i desperately just need to do something. accomplish any task. actually several would be nice. but i cannot stand just letting life go by #while i watch other people have the things i want. or even metaphorically living my dream like. that should be me why am i settling for thi #i hate even talking about this because i feel so stupid when i know it's not even a real tangible problem and that i actually DO have real #problems to tackle and the ability to do so but i'm choosing to be upset over the stupidest things i could possibly be sad about #and i can't even be sad about it in a normal way i'm cycling through like several different reactions to smth that isn't even real #or if it is real i literally do not have tanglible evidence for it one way or another like i'm driving myself insane for no reason #i can't even get catharsis because all i'm doing is digging a deeper hole for something i never should've gone back into in the first place #because i KNOW how i am i KNOW how i react to things and i still chose to do it lmao.#and i continue to choose to go through this shit instead of actively trying to change my life because... i'm lazy? and stupid? idk #negative self-talk isn't gonna get me to do anything either so let's just say i'm feeling particularly unmotivated like usual #i hated being a teenager but i really do miss when all my problems just amounted to 'someone was mean to me on tumblr today :(' or i failed #a test in chemistry or something. like i yearn for that simplicity becasue at this point all i'm doing is ruining my own life LMAO #i'm too scared to live i'm too scared to die so i just sit here and fantasize that life could be amazing if i wait #and i'll magically get everything i've ever wanted if i just wait long enough. and i know it isn't true and i still wait for it to happen.#because honestly like. i think deep down i am just convinced i will fail at anything i do when that shouldn't be what scares me.#what scares me should be never even allowing myself to fail because i never tried to do anything at all with myself or my life #like. wake the fuck up. get off your ass and put in the effort. learn some skills. gain independence and stability and discipline and do it #just live please i'm begging you just live so i can be happy don't i deserve to be happy... why am i not letting myself be happy #i'm literally keeping myself trapped in this negative feedback loop ON PURPOSE because teehee shiny toy #and it doesn't matter if the love is real it doesn't matter how i feel like i'm just using it as a distraction i can't say it's motivation #because it's barely motivated me at all. i have to start being realistic. 25 & just realizing you actually have to participate in your life #anyways. i've cried i've agonized i've pictured killing myself in 30 different ways. i think the only way i'm gonna feel better is #to just actually try this time without giving up. wish me luck

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satanic-fruitcake · 1 month ago

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what the fuck is wrong with meeee 👍

#why do i have no backbone whatsoever. why do i just let my mum use my money to fund her drug addiction #she owes me thousands at this point. i barely even care #thanks for letting your shitty boyfriend with the known gambling problem borrow my debit card btw mum. real nice of you.#and i’m just letting it happen. because what’s the point of being angry it won’t change anything #i mean seriously what are my options here. cut her off and watch her die from withdrawal because she refuses to take care of herself?#go live with my dad? and be surrounded on all sides by transphobia? never come out of the closet?#try to leave the nest as a depressed agoraphobe who’s never had a job in the middle of a housing crisis?#can someone come fucking save me from this nightmare of paralysis i’m in i’m so serious #uh. hi. me when i vent 👍

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cosmossystem · 5 months ago

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so this post may be controversial but i will no longer be silenced. i need people to start being accepting of bears/fat men in general that don't fit into the "dad" vibe or aren't conventionally attractive. quit acting like they've all gotta be incels/mladys/neckbeards/racist weebs etc. because first off, fat hairy nerdy men with patchy beards and glasses or acne or bald spots or whatever are HOT and i'm tired of pretending they're not!!!!!! and more importantly!!! even if you aren't attracted to them (or even if you are) i need you to start being fucking normal about them. because if you keep treating every fat hairy guy with glasses as if he's this rampant bigot, you're just gonna create more divides, and also you're a fucking asshole who equates looks with morality. something something alt-right pipeline, someone's worth is not determined by how attractive you find them, etc. please stop being fatphobic to ppl you don't like lol