#why did u destroy him
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iykyk (old comic that i never finished because i didnât wanna draw leviathan faux (but i drew him anyways)) spoilers under the cut!!!
ALSO im so sorry if this has been done before đđ
#brc spoilers#bomb rush cyberfunk spoilers#brc#bomb rush cyberfunk#brc faux#brc felix#brc red#faulix#in a way#art tag#i figured if u finished the game the last panel was unnecessary but i honestly did wanna try my hand at drawing him#and yeah im never drawing him again#but he looks silly so i wanted to include it#also looking back im not sure why i did red felix full color but NOTHING ELSE jdksskkskssj#i barely ever post unfinished/sketchy stuff so sorry if im missing details#THANKS tumblr for absolutely destroying the quality of the last image. you cant even see him blush anymore whats the fucking point
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just started whole cake and i think its gonna become my favorite arc just cuz of the sanji content. anyways favorite scene so far <33 pudding and luffy gushing over sanji was soo (can u tell that this is completely self indulgent by how incoherent and messy it is)
i love pudding so much she's so sweet I sure hope nothing bad happens in relation to her! !! (last words before disaster)
#yrah so i just took it outta my drafts (also repost cuz tags weren't working) and#UGGHFH PUDDING WHY#I HATE HER NOOO WHY DID SHE DO THAG#GURL I TRUSTED U AND WATCHING SANJI CRY MADE . ME CRY AND EVERYTIME HE CRIES IC CRY#WCI HAS DESTROYED ME IM IN SHAMBLES#almost at the wedding ugh sanji better GET her ASS idc about chivalry#or like. make luffy or nami do it for him UGHHHFHSK HE DESERVES SO MUCH BETTER#one piece#op#art#mintart#my art#wci#whole cake island#vinsmoke sanji#charlotte pudding#monkey d luffy#sanlu#lusan#is that the ship name#idk herlp
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thinking about. i dont know how to phrase this really but. chloe and frank.
like. when Chloe killed Frank i (, personally,) feel like her guilt from it was less because she killed Frank, and More because she Killed Someone (and their dog).
but!!! thats not to say she didnt feel guilty for killing Frank. because she definitely did. because on some level. despite everything. despite all of his shitty behavior. a part of her still cared for him. that tiny 15-17ish year old part in her still cared for him.
because that 15-17ish year old with intense abandonment issues in her only had. a small handful of people in her life that actually cared for her, and when THOSE few people arenât even doing the best job at itâ itâs no shit that Chloeâs standards for Good Friends are going to be Immensely dropped.
and so. itâs kind of like what happened with Rachel, but WAY less intense. when she found someone who didnât hate her, and was willing to hang around herâafter so so long of people hating her and not wanting to be around herâ it makes sense that part of her would kinda latch onto them a little bit.
and so, even after all of the shit sheâs learned he didâ even when Frank starts to hate herâ even when he threatens Max and herâs livesâ part of her keeps remembering him as one of the few guys who stuck around when no one else did.
itâs just that. no matter how bad the personâ if youâve known someone for years, and they were one of the only nice people to you in a town where theres like. four people that are nice to youâ itâs gonna hurt if you kill them. even if it was self defense. even if it was entirely their own faultâ even if you two arenât on even remotely good terms anymore.
ESPECIALLY for such a sentimental person like Chloe. taking that in consideration it makes me wonder. maybe she didnât feel bad for killing Frank. maybe she felt bad for killing the person Frank used to be to her. but maybe she realized that That Frank already died long ago.
but yeah. im mentally ill. take everything i said with a grain of salt considering it is 12:07 AM.
#my thoughts are a mixture of coherentness but also just enough of radio static that i cant write much of it out Correctly#but anyways dont you think itâs a little fucked that.#and maybe im reading it wrong but#like.#she really wanted to be friends with him in bts#she was really put that position#god idk#feel free to discuss about the whole. âchloe felt bad for killing Somebody not just frankâ thing. thatâs not something im 100% set in stone#with LOL. im open to other interpretations of it#that isnt to say the rest of this isnt open to discussionâ but that part In Particular is#this post is mostly about how âfrank was chloes friendâ more than anything#itâs about how. out of the entire town. the shitty drug dealer is one of the guys who gives an actual shit about her#and about how. something happened in between BTS and LIS to make them hate eachother#like YES the 5000 dollar debt but that just CANT be it can it? was it rachelâs disappearance that destroyed them?#or did frank start declining after the whole dameon thing??? WHAT CHANGED THEMâŠ..#anyways im sure im not the first to think of this and im ready to hear other peoples opinions on it#SCREAMING AND CRYING BC CHLOE IS LITERALLY SUCH A GOOD CHARACTER BUT PEOPLE ARE TOO MISOGYNISTIC TO SEE IT RAHGDHSGSHGA#if i had a nickel for every time i said âevenâ âdespiteâ or âbecauseâ in this post iâd be rich#life is strange is a game about tragedy. and. misogyny.#ALSO TAKE IN CONSIDERATION. if u read this far.#that chloe likely met frank Before she was Really Truly convinced that there was zero hope for her to find somebody who cared for her#so it took a lot less effort for someone like frank to leave an imprint on chloe atp of her life.#and also partly why it was So Much More intense with rachel#hoping to god this is coherent#lis#life is strange#chloe price#frank bowers#rachel amber#âŠ. i really doubt it will happen
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i want to see izzy suffer SO badly, i want to see him hurt, put that man through hell
#nothing brings me greater joy in life than to torment my boy#(and then kiss his little head and wrap him in a blanket......)#s2 arc where my boy gets tortured <3#literally there is nothing better than absolutely destroying him (and then gently nursing him back to health)#fndkdkkd sorry im thinking about him and im going to make it yalls problem <3#sometimes... i want him to have a soft life only...... and sometimes i still want him to have softness in his life but it to be given after#he has suffered SO MUCH. break him down so he can accept love + kindness.....#nyxtalks#ofmd#izzy hands#israel hands#why yes i am IMMEDIATELY using my tone indicator banners to post dumb shit what did u expect from me <3
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Rowaelin Chapter 41 Kingdom of Ash:
She'd rebuild itâwhat she had been.
Perhaps one last time, perhaps only for a little while, but she'd do it. If only for Terrasen.
Rowan swooped from the mast, shifting as he reached her side at the rail. He surveyed the night-black sea beyond them. "You should rest." She slid him a glance. "I'm not tired." Not a lie, not in some regards. "Want to spar?" He frowned. "Training can start tomorrow."
"Or tonight." She held his piercing stare, matched his dominance with her own.
"It can wait a few hours, Aelin."
"Every day counts." Against Erawan, even a day of training would count.
Rowan's jaw tightened. "True," he said at last. "But it can still wait. There are ... there are things we need to discuss." The silent words rose in his animal-bright eyes. About you and me.
Her mouth went dry. But Aelin nodded In silence, they strode into their spacious quarters, its only decoration the wall of windows that overlooked the churning sea behind them. A far cry from a queen's chamber, or any she might have purchased as Adarlan's assassin.
At least the bed built into the wall looked clean enough, the sheets crisp and stainless. But Aelin headed for the oak desk anchored to the floor, and leaned against it while Rowan shut the door.
In the dim lantern light, they stared at each other.
She'd endured Maeve and Cairn; she'd endured Endovier and countless other horrors and losses. She could have this conversation with him. The first step toward rebuilding herself.
Aelin knew Rowan could hear her thundering heart as the space between them went taut. She swallowed once. "Elide and Lorcan told you... told you everything that was said on that beach."
A curt nod, wariness flooding his eyes. "Everything that Maeve said." Another nod.
She braced herself. "That I'm-we're mates."
Understanding and something like relief replaced that wariness. "Yes."
"I'm your mate," she said, needing to voice it. "And you are mine."
Rowan crossed the room, but halted a few feet from the desk on which she leaned. "What of it, Aelin?" His question was low, rough.
"Don't you..." She scrubbed at her face. "You know what she did to you, to ..." She couldn't say her name. Lyria. "Because of it."
"I do know."
"And?"
"And what do you wish me to say?"
She pushed off the desk. "I wish you to tell me how you feel about it. IfâŠ"
"If what?"
"If you wish it wasn't so."
His brows narrowed. "Why would I ever wish that?"
She shook her head, unable to answer, and stared over her shoulder toward the sea.
It seemed like he would close the distance between them, but he remained where he was.
"Aelin." His voice turned hoarse. "Aelin."
She looked at him then, at the pain in his words.
"Do you know what I wish?" He exposed his palms, one tattooed, the other unmarked. "I wish that you had told me. When you realized it. I wish you had told me then."
She swallowed against the ache in her throat. "I didn't want to hurt you."
"Why would it ever hurt me to know the truth that was already in my heart? The truth I hoped for?"
"I didn't understand it. I didn't understand how it was possible. I thought maybe ... maybe you might be able to have two mates within a lifetime, but even then, I just âŠ.." She blew out a breath. "I didn't want you to be distressed." His eyes softened. "Do I regret that Lyria was dragged into this, that the cost of Maeve's game was her life, and the life of the child we might have had? Yes. I regret that, and I wish it had never happened." He would bear the tattoo to remember it for the rest of his days. "But none of that was your fault. I will always carry some of the burden of it, always know I chose to leave her for war and glory, and that I played right into Maeve's hands."
"Maeve wanted to ensnare you to get to me, though."
"Then it is her choice, not yours."
Aelin ran a hand over the worn wood of the desk. "In those illusions she spun for me, she showed me variations on one more than all the others." The words were strained, but she forced them out. Forced herself to look at him. "She spun me one dreamscape that felt so real I could smell the wind off the Staghorns."
"What did she show you?" A breathless question.
Aelin had to swallow before she could answer. "She showed me what might have beenâif there had been no Erawan, if Elena had dealt with him properly and banished him. If there had been no Lyria, none of that pain or despair you endured. She showed me Terrasen as it would have been today, with my father as king, and my childhood happy, and..." Her lips wobbled. "When I turned twenty, you came with a delegation of Fae to Terrasen, to make amends for the rift between my mother and Maeve. And you and I took one look at each other in my father's throne room, and we knew."
She didn't fight the stinging in her eyes. "I wanted to believe that was the true world. That this was the nightmare from which I'd awaken. I wanted to believe that there was a place where you and I had never known this suffering and loss, where we'd take one look at each other and know we were mates. Maeve told me she could make it so. If I gave her the keys, she'd make it all possible." She wiped at her cheek, at the tear that escaped down it. "She spun me realities where you were dead, where you'd been killed by Erawan and only in handing over the keys to her would I be able to avenge you. But those realities made me ... I stopped being useful to her when she told me you were gone. She couldn't get me to talk, to think. Yet in the ones where you and I met, where things were as they should have been ... that was when I came the closest."
His swallow was audible. "What stopped you?"
She wiped at her face again. "The male I fell in love with was you. It was you, who knew pain as I did, and who walked with me through it, back to the light. Maeve didn't understand that. That even if she could create that perfect world, it wouldn't be you with me. And I'd never trade that, trade this. Not for anything." He extended his hand. An offer and invitation.
Aelin laid hers atop his, and his callused fingers squeezed gently. "I wanted it to be you," he breathed, closing his eyes. "For months and months, even in Wendlyn, I wondered why you weren't my mate instead. It tore me up, wondering it, but I still did." He opened his eyes, and they burned like green fire. "All this time, I wanted it to be you."
She lowered her gaze, but he hooked a thumb and forefinger around her chin and lifted her face.
"I know you are tired, Fireheart. I know that the burden on your shoulders is more than anyone should endure." He took their joined hands and laid them on his heart. "But we'll face this together. Erawan, the Lock, all of it.
"We'll face it together. And when we are done, when you Settle, we will have a thousand years together. Longer."
A small sound came out of her. "Elena said the Lock requiresâ"
"We'll face it together," he swore again.
"And if the cost of it truly is you, then we'll pay it together. As one soul in two bodies.
Her heart strained to the point of cleaving. "Terrasen needs a king."
"I have no intention of ruling Terrasen without you. Aedion can have the job."
She scanned his face. He meant every word He brushed the hair from her face, his other hand still clasping hers to his chest, where his heart pounded a steady, unfaltering rhythm.
"Even if I had my choice of any dream-realities, any perfect illusions, I would still choose you, too."
She felt the truth of his words echo into the unbreakable thing that bound their very souls, and tilted her face up toward his. But he made no move beyond it.
She frowned. "Why aren't you kissing me?"
"I thought you might want to be asked first."
"That never stopped you before."
"This first time, I wanted to make sure you were ... ready." After Cairn and Maeve. After months of having no choices whatsoever.
She smiled despite that truth. "I'm ready to be kissed again, Prince."
He let out a dark chuckle and muttered, "Thank the gods," before he lowered his mouth to hers.
"You're my mate." Her words were a breathless rush. "And I am yours."
The world might have been burning around them for all she cared, all he cared, too.
"Together, Aelin," he promised, and she heard the rest of the words in every place their bodies joined. Together they would face this, together they would find a way.
Together we'll find a way, their mingling breaths, the crashing sea, seemed to echo.
Together.
#Chapter 41#Kingdom of Ash#Sarah J. Maas#Aelin Galathynius#Rowan Whitethorn#Rowaelin#soulmates#mates#spoilers and notes in tags cause this chapter and also spoilers in post cause this chapter first read react with me read along#Rowaelin chapters scenes moments quotes#they want to make it possible bring that love to light#am I allowed to cry? â Again the word endured â finally the dream â the sand she still sees â heâs magic being steady â them talking time#again if Maeve could convince Rowan Lyria was his mate how bad was it when she convinced Aelin her actual mate was dead⊠this hurts meâŠ#the fact Aelin stopped being useful because it destroyed her beyond belief but the dreams the dreams almost got her because its all she wan#again then both feeling sorry and the other not realizing and then consent and then comfort and love & I just wanted it2be U how could I no#I know you are tired Fireheart (ALL THE TROPES IN ONE LINE⊠UGH I MISSED THIS SHIP)#together. one soul in two bodies. their endgame like literally they are. Iâd choose you too. even the apologies that were needed just heali#what it might have once been â together â not alone â not returning alone â the king and queen of Terrasen â I need u more â 2 whatever end#Aelin watched the boat until it disappeared trying not to stare too long at the clean unstained sand beneath her boots#always north â she didnât care she just wanted far away â who knew â what she knew-the letters she sent-Valg-dark blood that had turned red#If it had been another dreamscape or some fragment that had blended into the very real memory of Connall's death. â always a plab&theory#all these things to deal with later-sheâd rebuild all she had been-her match helper mirror-matched his piercing stare with her own-wait/res#A far cry from a queen's chamber or any she might have purchased as Adarlan's assassin. â how far weâve come-she had ENDURED she can do it#I'm your mate she said needing to voice it. And you are mine. â Lyria. â I do know. and?&what do you wish me to say?-this was perfect#If what? If you wish it wasn't so. His brows narrowed. Why would I ever wish that? â Aelin. she looked at him at the pain in his words#the way it's changed since Mistward... and grown... even in names like Whitethorn Galathynius together â the brain thoughts are back â#The kiss was gentle-light. Letting her decide how to guide it. So she did. â heâd do it all night if that was whatâs he wished#Together we'll find a way their mingling breaths the crashing sea seemed to echo. Together. â mountains and oceans#Mightâve been before-thought snapped-the bond- u r my mate&I am urs-the world might have been burning for all she cared all he cared too#Together they would face this together they would find a way. â claiming him as he claimed her â a scar a marker a tattoo
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Crying at the fact that Amuro got Kogoro fucking arrested just to get conan to help him save the damn country when he could just. Do it through email
Like yeah ofc there's a canon explanation for this but look me in the eye and say that he wasn't just being a bit dramatic here
#like u know that guy LOVES mystery and saving ppl and destroying buildings why did u have to fucking FRAME HIS UNCLE#detective conan#which one do you think is more dramatic:#this or him having gay fights on ferris wheel or him pushing his hair back like hes in a pantene commercial right after he almost died#zero the enforcer#furuya rei
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if i did a reread of the walking dead and wrote an essay on how aegon ii and carl are doomed to be the last man standing by their narratives, and what starts out as a sort of cool & nifty super power of always surviving turns into this horrific curse where everyone they know is dying around them & sometimes itâs their fault & sometimes itâs not but either way they canât ever stop it until theyâre sitting at the ending with nothing but their lone daughter to protect but so broken they can no longer connect to her and then their story abruptly ends-
would that be like the Most stupid, nerdy thing i have ever done in my life or
#valyrianscrolls#aegon the usurper#carl grimes#i associate the phrase âlast man standingâ so heavily with carl that i used it to describe aegon and my brain short circuited#alsoâŠsomething something âif we forgive our fathers what else is leftâ and âyou can never escape your mothers bloodâ#re: carlâs life going so badly bc of his fatherâs vicious & world destroying love. and viserys destroying aegonâs life bc of his own lack of#love for aegon. completely accident. neither viserys or rick set out to create a worse world and yet.#and lori and alicent standing like ghosts over their babies. what do you do when your motherâs misery in her marriage is the reason your#life went off the rails. how do you hate her for it yet how do you love her.#rick ultimately dying at the hands of one of his victims. viserys rotting to deal surrounding by the children he emotionally abandoned.#THERES SOMETHING HERE#ROBERT KIRKMAN I KNOW YOU WERE AT CONS WITH GEORGE DID U EVER HANG OUT A BIT. YOU BOTH LOVE DOOMED BY THE NARRATIVE STORIES#AND HATE HOW PUSHY YOUR FANBASE IS AJSJDJ#getting on my soap box#this is comics carl obviously show carl is also my child and last man standing itâs just that they didnât want to pay chandler riggs money#and killed him off. in my mind show carl outlives rick & michonne & judith & rj. just carl & maggie on opposite sides of the coast#alone with their grief and refusing to speak bc they no longer have the words.#carlâs daughter asks why her name is mj and carlâs grief chokes the words
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ok yes will toastybro could NOT fucking sing when he started releasing music, this is absolutely true and i in fact kind of love it. but like no will boy can in fact sing now and i have mad respect for the vocal training he must have done over the years. also his voice is kinda sexy now</3
#spam brain#so sad why am i suddenly extremely attracted to william carlos seating headrest toastito#anyways i unironically love his voice now ok. like beyond my weird attraction to him#his range is WAY better and he has such better control over his voice and ii love hom#this was really hammered home b y a) listening to most of the songs off mirror to mirror and b) listening to commit yourself completely#his live performances are SO FUCKING GOOD#thanks spotify u did one good thing for me. what would i have ever done w my life if i didnt get to hear will torpedo sing a cover of ivy#like. what the fuck that destroyed me#AND THE LIVE BEACH LIFE IN DEATH PERFORMANCE. FUCK#i literally enjoy cosmic hero on that album more than the studio recording lol#anyways just here to further perpetate my williamm toledo lover agenda<33333#Will Toledo#Car Seat Headrest#CSG#non fandom
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i'm about to throw hands with this yt poll.
this is the zelda version of that twitter butch post to me.
#the best zeldas arent even here!!! if og 'i was like 8 y/o when i SHATTERED the triforce and hid it ALONE in a monster infested land' zelda#and st 'the only one with a character arc u see play in real time & goes from i'll wait here to i will STAB malladus with my own 2 hands#and alone if i have to' zelda were here they'd obliterate the competition. maybe not in votes but just in terms of correctness#BUT EVEN IN THIS CASE. ur not voting for ms. 'i saw my family home and kingdom be systematically destroyed over the course of 7 years &#stood back up said no & changed my ENTIRE self to try to save everyone largely on my own for 7! years! as a child!! only to at the end of#it all be the only person who can truly empathise with the hero who had his childhood stolen from him and return it even though i will#never have mine again'????????????#or even ms. 'i was normal & happy & loved until i wasnt and i learnt i was the orchestrator of my own and everyone else's misery because im#not even myself & im so much bigger yet lesser than who i thought i was and if i cannot be divine then i will be less than worthless i will#be a blight who couldnt execute the plan i had tossed everyone into and they will have lived in my lie and died for nothing so i will be#divine even if that means sealing myself away for an eternity. even if i will never know happiness the way i did again'????????#i cant say anything about twipri. i barely remember her bc i watched that playthrough ages ago and she was barely in the game idk what ur#voting for#but botw???????? /BOTW/?????????????????#girl wasnt even the best princess in her own game and she only had one other competitor smh#(<-THAT'S A JOKE. THAT'S A JOKE. I AM JOKING.)#this whole thing is half a joke. i love botw zelda (dont look at me like that. i do) and i get why she's winning but like. come on. that's#way too big of a divide. how are oot and skysw losing that much. botw zelda's voice alone should have cost her half her votes#WKSHDKSDHKKA#anyway this whole thing is for funsies so dont be weird on my post ok <3? ive had a shit three days and if being fake mad at a silky video#game poll makes me laugh then that's fair ok? and if you're weird i have the license to explode you with my mind and curse your family for#3 generations ok <333?#freya talks loz
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do u ever think about how there's 8 dagoth siblings.....the number of scorpio. the number of transformation and death and rebirth. the number of the serpent. ough
or. do u think of how dagoth ur was probably formed from voryn's last dying thoughts, and that involved thoughts of their family. of keeping their family safe and away from the heart and all the wretched things it can do to a mortal's soul
do u think that's why the ash vampires (voryn's siblings) can't go near the heart in the game? bc voryn didn't want them to be corrupted. so dagoth ur channels the heart's power through themself instead (because they are already dead and there's no hope left for them) and spreads it to their siblings to keep them alive indefinitely. voryn's last self sacrificial feelings carry on through dagoth ur
and do u think that voryn's siblings serve dagoth ur as loyally as they do, despite all of them being very sane of mind and rational (while dagoth ur Isn't) in return for the love and care that voryn held for them before all of this happened? when they were all a normal, untainted, living family? do you think so too? i do
#the dagoth fam Destroys me#it hurts so much to see how bitter and angry araynys is towards the nerevarine. for what nerevar did to voryn :')#bc nerevar Did play an important role in creating dagoth ur#and its. nice to see that some of voryn's siblings hold him responsible for that#even tho theyre aware that the nerevarine isnt Really nerevar himself and that the nerevarine probably doesnt remember any of them#its interesting that some of the dagoth siblings imply that they know nerevar and that theyve met him#while others say they dont remember him at all#do u think they dont remember nerevar bc they were mere children when the war happened? and when voryn died?#do u think. thats why araynys is so bitter towards nerevar. bc they only a child when it all took place? oh im so normal about this#dagoth ur#txt
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I forgot how hard dude got hit by the tale of the future.
#meowdred: yeah and you were an unga bunga hateful madman. i understand why you did it but i put u down like a dog.#meowdred was not helping#i doubt liios is that much kinder (i'm playing on liios) but he had more sympathy for emet-selch#and questioned whether what he did was right.#he did what he did to a) get g'raha back and b) ptolemy was with him for shb#which meant unless it'd destroy the world as it was liios would've killed emet-selch anyway#but something nagged at him#liios suvali
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he would not fucking say that
#i hate 4x13#its not even just the cheerleader comment hes just immediately using a position of power to bully kids ?!? when has he ever done that#and like you know there are young women watching this show having a character they look up to make predatory comments about teenage girls is#literally so irresponsible and creepu#creepy#kripke dabb loflin i am killing and destroying you#and ngl. i would let it slide if he didnt look so fucking ugly in that outfit#he was JUST saying how horrible he feels that he wasnt able to resist 30 years of torture and felt good releasing it why would you. have him#practice that same behavior as a joke#have u heard of writing an episode centered on one of your leads where the other one is still written well#anyway colin ford did an amazing jobâ„ïž#and dean. shouldnt have been played by someone named brock#lose-chester is kind of funny though and also right#why do they always say they werent buried they were cremated i know the location of the ashed isnt relevant to the plot but the families#dont know theyre in supernatural lol#the dedications ⊠imagine u die and your legacy is supernatural season 4 episode 13 after school special đ#finally on sex and violence good lordt. better call thee winchesters
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i hate going âhey i might not be up to hanging out im just not doing well mentallyâ but also i know if im either constantly panicking or completely out of it while weâre hanging out then it wonât go well
#got into a fight with my mum because she was like âwell why r u still scared when weâre not seeing massive waves and hospitals arenât#overrun and this 80 year old family friend has had it three times and is fine every time#and do you look at what people who donât have the same opinion of you are sayingâ#my response to this was âno I do look at the scientific articles that come out though and most of the ones about covid are finding it does#damage to multiple parts of the bodyâ#like. i already have fibromyalgia. weâve removed the cancerous tumor but i still have iodine radiation and have to hope the cancer cells#they found in my blood vessels didnât go far enough to spread and if they did that the iodine destroys them#like. is a kid with fibromyalgia not enough. im not doing chemo so itâs fine right just get me sick#does she not fucking remember how it destroyed her husband. she watched it we all fucking watched for weeks as he withered away from this#fucking disease#and then everything we didnât see we got in twice daily calls from the hospital as they told us how his kidneys failed and they were excited#when he could breathe on his side for two hours instead of just on his stomach and then it killed him#am i the only one in the household who remembers seeing my dad as a barely breathing corpse when we forced him to go to the hospital because#he couldnât say three words or walk a few steps without panting like heâd just done a sprint#im tired of her making me feel crazy for not wanting this disease im not irrational or insane for this i promise i promise im not#im tired of her coming in 5 minutes after i leave an argument going âdonât be angry with me. itâs just that-â and then making my only safe#place in this house a part of the argument too#fuck it itâs fine Iâm out in a few months anyway#vent tw#sittin g in a corner rn so that the only open space is in front of me and i can pull my legs up to my chest and my fan is on and my windows#are open and im tired of being called crazy and paranoid and irrational#covid tw
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I love indie horror games, no not the soulless mascot ones, those ones where itâs like, hey dude you gotta hunt a bunch of squirrels in order to make your dead skinless wife beautiful again by covering her headless body with them
#throw me into a cavern disguised as a normal mine until itâs slowly becomes fleshy and sentient please#damn I love exploring an ocean of blood in a doomed to be destroyed submarine#how did u know I wanted to be a praying mantis and build a bridge to heaven out of squirrel parts?#speaking of submarines why not search for god at the bottom of the sea (and find him)
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Kingdom of Ash Chapter 59
Chapter; Highlights
His ears still rang with the din of battle, his breath a rasping beat echoed by Aelin.
Atop the blood-slick battlements, their allies and companions around them, Rowan wordlessly passed Aelin the waterskin. She drank deeply, then handed it to Fenrys.
An unleashing and release. That's what the battle had been for his mate.
Hasar at last looked Aelin over. "I heard you put on a show today."
Rowan braced himself.
Aelin turned from the battlefield and inclined her head. "You look as if you did, too." Indeed, Hasar's ornate armor was splattered with black blood. She'd been in the thick of it, atop her Muniqi horse, and had ridden right up to the gates. But the princess made no further comment.
Irritation, deep and nearly hidden, flashed in Aelin's eyes. Yet she didn't speak again-didn't push the princess about their next steps. She just watched the battlefield once more, chewing on her lip.
She'd barely stopped during the battle, halting only when there had been no more Valg left to kill. And in the minutes since the walls had been cleared, she'd remained quietâ distant. As if she was still climbing out of that calm, calculating place she'd descended into while fighting. She hadn't bothered to remove any of her armor. The bronze battle-crown was caked with blood, her hair matted with it.
Chaol's father had taken one look at her armor, at Rowan's, and gone white with rage.
For now. They had bigger things to consider. Things that drove his mate to gnaw on her lip. When Prince Kashin's army might arrive, if they would indeed head northward to Terrasen. If today had been enough to win them over.
"Any nearby are to run here. Those farthest out will have to flee for the forest." Rowan met Aelin's stare. Her hands began shaking.
This cannot end here, she seemed to say.
Panicâpanic indeed flared in her eyes. Rowan gripped her trembling hand and squeezed.
But there was no truth or lie that might soothe her. No truth or lie to save the army on the plain.
Something had gone wrong. Something was wrong.
The battlefield stretched into the distance, healers darting amongst the felled bodies with white banners high to indicate their locations. So many. So many dead and wounded. A sea of them.
Elide reached Chaol's side just as Nesryn Faliq leaped atop her beautiful ruk, launching into a dive for the army below. No-the other ruks.
Elide laid a hand on Lord Chaol's shoulder, drawing his attention from where he watched Nesryn fly off. Blood-splattered, but his bronze eyes were clear. And full of terror.
Any message that Yrene had given Elide faded from her memory. "What's wrong?"
It was Aelin who answered, her bloodied armor strange and ancient. A vision of old. "The dam is going to break," the queen said hoarsely. "And wipe away anyone on the plain."
Oh gods. Oh gods.
Elide glanced between them, and knew the answer to her next question: What can be done?
Nothing.
Ruks took to the skies, flapping toward them, soldiers in their talons and clinging to their backs.
"Has anyone warned the healers?" Elide pointed to the white banners waving so far out into the plain. "The Healer on High?" Hafiza was down there, Yrene had said.
Silence. Then Prince Sartaq swore in his own tongue, and sprinted for his golden ruk. He was spearing for the battlefield within seconds, his shouts ringing out. Kadara dipped every few moments, and when she rose again, another small figure was in her talons. Healers. Grabbing as many of them as he could.
Elide whirled to her companions as soldiers began running for the keep, trampling corpse and injured alike. Orders went out in the language of the southern continent, and more soldiers on the battlefield leaped into action.
"What elsewhat else can we do?" Elide demanded. Aelin and Rowan only stared toward the battlefield, watching with Fenrys and Gavriel as the ruks raced to save as many as they could. Behind them, Princess Hasar paced, and Chaol and his father murmured about where they might fit everyone in the keep. Those who survived.
Elide looked at them again. Looked at all of them.
And then asked quietly, "Where is Lorcan?" None of them turned. Elide asked, louder, "Where is Lorcan?" Gavriel's tawny eyes scanned hers, confusion dancing there. "He ... he went out onto the battlefield during the fighting. I saw him just before the khagan's troops reached him."
"Where is he?" Elide's voice broke. Fenrys faced her now. Then Rowan and Aelin. Elide begged, voice breaking, "Where is Lorcan?" From their stunned silence, she knew they hadn't so much as wondered.
Elide whirled to the battlefield. To that endless stretch of fallen bodies. Soldiers fleeing. Many of the wounded being abandoned where they lay. So many bodies. So, so many soldiers down there.
"Where." No one answered. Elide pointed toward the battlefield and snarled at Gavriel, "Where did you see him join with the khagan's forces?"
"Nearly on the other side of the field," Gavriel answered, voice strained, and pointed across the plain. "IâI didn't see him after that."
"Shit," Fenrys breathed.
Rowan said to him, "Use your magic. Jump to the field, find him, and bring him back."
Relief crumpled Elide's chest.
Until Fenrys said, "I can't."
"You didn't use it once during the battle," Rowan challenged. "You should be fully primed to do it."
Fenrys blanched beneath the blood on his face, and cast pleading eyes to Elide. "I can't."
Silence fell on the battlements.
Then Rowan growled, "You won't." He pointed with a bloody finger to the battlefield.
"You'd let him die, and for what? Aelin forgave him." His tattoo scrunched as he snarled again.
"Save him."
Fenrys swallowed. But Aelin said, "Leave it, Rowan." Rowan snarled at her too. She snarled right back. "Leave it."
Some unspoken conversation passed between them, and the hope flaring in Elide's chest went out as Rowan backed down. Gave Fenrys an apologetic nod. Fenrys, looking like he was going to be sick, just faced the battlefield again.
Elide backed away a step. Then another.
Lorcan couldn't be dead.
She would know if he were dead. She would know it, in her heart, her soul, if he were gone.
He was down there. He was down there, in that army, perhaps injured and bleeding out â No one stopped her as Elide raced inside the keep. Each step limped, pain cracking through her leg, but she didn't falter as she hit the interior stairwell and plunged into the chaos.
She had made him a promise.
She had sworn him an oath, all those months ago.
I will always find you.
Soldiers and healers fled up the stairs, shoving past Elide. The shouting was near-deafening, bouncing off the ancient stones. She battled her way down, sobbing through her teeth.
I will always find you.
Pushing, elbowing, bellowing at the frantic people who ran past her, Elide fought for each step downward. Toward the gates.
People screamed, a never-ending flood surging up the stairs. Still Elide pushed her way down, losing a step here, another there. They did not even look at her, even try to clear a way as they flowed upward. It was only when Elide lost another step that she roared into the stairwell, "Clear a path for the queen!"
No one listened, so she did it again. She filled her voice with command, with every ounce of power that she'd seen the Fae males use to intimidate their opponents. "Clear a path for the queen!"
This time, people pressed against the walls.
Elide took the small opening, and screamed her order again and again, ankle barking with every step down.
But she made it. Made it to the chaotic lower level, to the open gates teeming with soldiers. Beyond them, bodies stretched into the horizon. Warriors and healers and those bearing the wounded rushed toward any stairwell they could find.
Elide managed all of five limping steps toward the open gate before she knew it would be impossible. To cross the field, to find him on the endless plain, before that dam burst and he was swept away. Before he was gone forever.
He was not dead.
He was not dead.
I will always find you.
Elide scanned the gates, the skies for any sign of a ruk that might carry her. But they soared to the upper levels, crawling with soldiers and healers, some even depositing their charges onto the mountain face itself. And at ground level, none would hear her cries for help.
No soldiers would stop, either.
Elide scanned the other end of the gates' entryway.
Beheld the horses being led out from their stables by frantic handlers, the beasts bucking at the panic around them as they were hauled toward the teeming ramps.
A black mare reared, her cry a sharp warning before she slashed her hooves at the handler. Lord Chaol's horse. The handler shrieked and fell back, barely grasping the reins as the horse stomped, her ears flat to her head.
Elide did not think. Did not reconsider. She limped for the horses and the stables.
She said to the frantic handler, still backing away from the half-wild horse, "I'll get her." The man, white-faced, threw her the reins.
"Good luck." Then he, too, ran.
The mare Farasha-yanked so hard on the reins that Elide was nearly hurled across the stones. But she planted her feet, leg screaming, and said to the horse, "I have need of you, fierce-heart." She met Farasha's dark, raging eyes. "I have need of you." Her voice broke.
"Please."
And gods above, that horse stilled. Blinked.
Horses and handlers streamed past them, but Elide held firm. Waited until Farasha lowered her head, as if in permission.
The stirrups were low enough thanks to Lord Chaol's long legs that Elide could reach them. She still bit down on her shout as her weight settled on her bad ankle, as she pushed, and heaved herself into Farasha's fine saddle. A small mercy, that they had not even had time to unsaddle the horses after battle. A set of what seemed to be braces hung from its sides, surely to keep Lord Chaol stabilized, and Elide unhooked them. Any weight, anything to slow her, had to be discarded.
Elide gathered the reins. "To the battlefield, Farasha."
With a whinnying cry, Farasha plunged into the fray.
Soldiers leaped from their path, and Elide did not stop to apologize, did not stop for anyone, as she and the black mare charged toward the gates. Then through them.
And onto the plain.
#Chapter 59#Kingdom of Ash#Sarah J. Maas#Rowan Whitethorn#Aelin Galathynius#Nesryn Faliq#Chaol Westfall#Yrene Towers#Gavriel#Princess Hasar#Lorcan Salvaterre#Elide Lochan#Fenrys Moonbeam#First Read along with me NO SPOILERS PLEASE though warning for post & tags up to KoA 59 & more reacts/notes/quotes in tags below#Aelin wonât take itUnleashing&releaseI KNEW SHE HAD A PLANdeeply waitingHis mate-Their world-Wild-Irritation-She didnât get impressed#Out of calm-Too soft-NowNOW-Pick anywhere and go-the magic-address later-she gave an option: panic.-Her water magic daughter of Mab#can she control it?-She knows heâs alive because she still is but Valg the fear is real-Ruken yes-Refused to go-Lorcan NO DYING#the audiobook of this will destroy me-THANK YOU ELIDE GOOD QUESTION-Strange ancient-how had no one wondered#I cant/uwont-he didnât mean it like that-leave it-why?-I will always find u-THATconversation!what was the conversation-floods-shared power#Had he not been swept into the dance of battle he might have stopped to marvel at them. â The Darghan#And those that don't make it to the ruks? the princess pressed something like panic cracking through her fierce face.#Rowan's own heart thundered. They had won the battle only for the enemy to get the final say in their victory. Morath.#It would destroy this army this shred of hope in a simple brutal blow Was it a trap all along?-Itâs a trap! Did he pick Anielle for this?DA#NoNot like thisTheres nowhere for them to goThink laterRunNowPut them on the rocks anywhere.magic what if-open the gates-Oakwald#Sent by Yrene to see how Chaol fared a panting fearful question from a wife who had not heard anything of him since the battle#ELIDE KNEW#where is Lorcan going on the list of things that broke me cause Elide knew but also her heart knew cause it wouldve stopped without him#the protective LAY OFF Fenrys and then snarl and Rowanâs snarl back for Lorcan but then explanation & almost pack like mentality#I WILL FIND YOU I WILL ALWAYS FIND YOU#DO THEY HAVE MACELENA VIBES
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@truethes || cont.
đđđđ đđđ đđđđ đ đ
đđđđđđ đđđđđ, đđđđ & đđđđđđđ.   min-jun saw him grow like a flower in a wintry garden. for years he watched over him so every night, brought him homemade snacks, taught him how to make paper cranes, showed him the beauty of wild poppies, was by his side when the world started to fall  &  when he asked to be held. min-jun was merely a silent shadow, a little side-prop for the scenery,  &  yet their mutual bond  ââ  that lone red string of fate  ââ  was far stronger than any other, more  than life,  more  than death  itself. such cruel passing of time only strengthened this union. min-jun hadnât forgotten about kuro even when all the other villagers did, even when the house grew dark  &  he drove a knife into his motherâs throat, even when he lost his god damn mind, even then, even now... he still remembers.
â   kuro...   â  that sweet scent never changes;   â   thereâs nothing to be scared of...   â  slowly outstretching own pale hand, the black nailed fingers take gentle hold of the vampireâs wrist  &  tag him closer, inviting for a slow, nonchalant walk. a mantle of pale moonlight creeps through the many gaps in the streets, illuminating their path against the moving crowd.  â   itâs not far... i promise...   â  being surprisingly far more vocal than he was back then, the little killer reassures him in a tone that sounds pleasantly soothing yet strangely  distant,  almost as if the prior hint of emptiness only grew with time, like a crevice turning into a deep, bone-chilling  void.  thereâs something different about the boy he used to know, but then again, the very same can be applied to kuro who within the sea of chatter  &  footsteps suddenly gets dragged off the busy pavement  &  into an alley full of little night-time cafes, their petite windows emitting gentle light that barely wards off the shadows.
min-jun completely  ignores  their existence, walking past every door, bench,  &  sign until they once again exit the alleyway, stopping by a blissfully empty bus-stop. only then does the young serial killer turn towards the other, taking a little peek beneath the hood as he does.  â   are you okay... with buses.... ?   â
#// ... did i just spend about an hour to research about kuro for this?#why yes. yes i did.#was it worth it?#a b s o l u t e l y.#( the fact he can turn into a tiny ball of fluff is just â„ â„ â„ )#( not to mention envy can literally fit him in his pocket! )#( I . AM . SOLD . ) lmao#but yes! i did my best to mix their pasts just so it makes sense#especially since kuro destroyed everything#though luckily (unluckily?) enough#mrs. saebom took little min-jun just before that happened#and speaking of min-jun#you may have noticed that i'm not using ' envy' here and#that's because kuro is someone very special to him#so take it as a sign min-jun is being far more welcoming & open#instead of cold & fake - if not totally indifferent.#it's a very sweet thing really#but either way! i hope you like!#if you want any changes feel free to let me know ~#đȘ â á”ʰᔠᶫᶊá”á”ᶫᔠá”ᶊᶫᶫá”Êłâ
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