#why did i do it my god there are only two people max who care

[malachitezmeyka]

My sleep schedule's a bit messed up after a week of holiday and I can't fall asleep at a reasonable time while at my grandma's, so obviously I'm once again being plagued by my favourite kind of brain rot

Currently thinking about how there must have been a small moment of peace, a few weeks maybe, before Zaheer's breakout starts having major consequences but after Kuviren figure their shit out and everyone warms up to each other, where the Kids can relax and take a breather and act like the teenagers they never got to be

Because yes, I'm standing by what I said, none of the kids ever got to be actual teenagers:

Suiren had to grow up quickly after the loss of her parents. Her whole childhood was spent taking the brunt of Haya's violence, always aching, always hungry, with no one to turn to. The world's not fair, she learned quickly. You've got to help yourself because no one else will. You have to get Midori out of here. She trained herself not to cry, not to need as much food, not to require comfort. As she entered her teens, her childhood self had already starved to death. By the time she turned 13, she was already weary and burdened and exhausted, with no hopes for the future. By 15 she dropped out of school, and her only friends all that time were her sister and her moose lion. She can't think of anything but protecting Midori. No job in Gaoling will take her, deterred by her lack of schooling, her swamp heritage and what Haya had said about her. But money has to be earned somehow. Most girls like her end up in brothels, but she knows her prodigious waterbending skills could be put to a different use. By 17 she's an assassin, spending hours in the shower trying to scrub away the blood that is no longer there, focusing on nothing but the next mission, slicing the throats of those young girls with sparkling golden brown eyes that sometimes show up in the corners of her vision. The supposed carefree teenage years that she was owed are now way beyond her understanding.

Midori is not as weighed down with the weight of the world as Suiren, but she had her youth stolen as a consequence of what happened at the South Pole all those years ago too. Her trauma – Haya yelling at her for the slightest mistake, always calling her a useless child, calling her weak and a whiny brat for showing emotions natural to any child in her situation – left her extremely anxious, so quiet it's very easy to forget she's even there. Children are meant to be seen and not heard. And then there's the guilt, knowing full well her sister skips meals for her, takes punishments for her, endures beatings for her, no matter how hard Suiren tries to hide it. Midori hit puberty already wishing she was never born, maybe then Suiren's burden would have been alleviated. All of that in turn made it impossible for her to make friends, not to mention everyone knowing that her sister is the swamp freak, and their aunt's endless list of chores practically kept her chained at the house so she couldn't go out even if she had the chance to. She spent her 17th birthday fully aware her parents are out there, and allowed herself a childish hope that they'll be reunited, just like she always wished for thirteen long, horrible years. But her parents were killed within weeks afterwards. The day they got the news of their demise was the day she knew there was no going back. The day she knew that she was now an adult.

Bolin was protected by Mako for most of his life, ever since his parents were murdered when he was six, but even with his brother always looking out for him, what kind of childhood is living on the streets, running errands for triads? Still, out of the hundreds of homeless children in Republic City, he and Mako are the lucky ones, they were discovered and taken in by that probending trainer. But nothing in Republic City comes for free, and the two of them just so happen to make up two thirds of a team. His early teenage years were, he realises now, wasted, training in probending all day, every day. They go out on the field in every match they can but are still barely getting enough in earnings to scrape by, and life is only bearable because they can stay unconditionally in that room above the arena. He adores probending, the love and attention from his fans, but more often than not wishes he was part of the groups of friends that come to watch the games instead. He meets Korra at 16 and within the year has to witness her almost die three times, and despite all that training he was near powerless to stop it. After that was all over, he enlisted in Kuvira's army at 17, trying to get rid of that feeling of helplessness by deciding to help fix the mess created in the world during that year. But a soldier cannot be a child, and a child cannot be a soldier.

Kuvira's childhood ended the day her parents abandoned her at Suyin's front gate and never looked back, leaving her with nothing but the clothes on her back and a small sack of belongings. All for sometimes acting out, a result of them never paying her any attention as well as her possessing stronger bending than she could handle. It was easier to label her a problem child and get rid of her than to realise the cause of the issue. Suyin was different from her parents, extremely impressed by Kuvira's bending skills, to the point she made her her protege, and Kuvira, so unused to the praise, threw herself headfirst into making Suyin proud. Bending, dancing, training... It took up all of her free time, but as long as she gained Suyin's approval, she found that she didn't care. What use would she have for that much free time anyway? She's 17 and already made captain of the Zaofu guard as well as named the best dancer in the troupe. Some say it's because she's Suyin's prized pupil, but no one can deny that her metalbending is outstanding. But she never has time to hang out with the girls from the dance team or her comrades from the guard, and she pretends it doesn't matter to her, but she secretly yearns for that feeling of belonging. She sacrificed her teenagehood to make Suyin proud, and after all of that, despite everything Kuvira did, Suyin still doesn't consider her a daughter.

Opal is easily the most privileged of the five, being born into one of the wealthiest Earth Kingdom families does come with its perks, after all. But those grand metal domes of her home city that opened like flowers every morning were nothing more than gilded cages to her. Once it became obvious she wasn't a bender, her mother lost interest, happy to let her do as she pleased as long as she upheld the family image. It doesn't matter what hobby she chooses, nothing she achieves will be enough to rectify that her lack of bending brought an end to the rather short-lived Beifong dynasty of strong earthbending women. But she has to focus on something. Baatar shares their father's love for engineering, Huan has his art, the twins are total momma's boys with their metalbending games, Opal has nothing and no one. Somehow, even while distracted, her mother managed to keep her close enough that Opal could never meet someone without their first impression of her being through her mother's lens. She turned to books to cope with the loneliness, always dreaming of a life away from Zaofu. She's freshly 17 when she got it, but what started as a dream come true quickly turned into a nightmare once the northern air temple was attacked by the Red Lotus. Her childhood innocence and belief in the good of the world died somewhere within that cave.

My point is, the five of them deserve to act like teenagers, to gain back what they lost. Let Suiren rebel, let Midori make friends, let Bolin have fun, let Kuvira relax, let Opal express herself, LET THEM BE KIDS

And I just love to imagine what they'd get up to in that moment of peace. Maybe they gather together, a bit away from the RL, and play dumb games like Fuck Marry Kill. Playing with Kuvira is always a challenge because she knows exactly which buttons to push, which is how she got Suiren to say, through gritted teeth and lots of cursing, that she'd marry Mako, because the other two options were Suyin and Unalaq and she's a distinguished lesbian and not fucking a man thank you very much.

Maybe they go out in the early hours of the morning and climb to the top of the rocks hiding the cabin from view to watch the sun rise over Republic City. Maybe their games of truth or dare get so intense you wouldn't want to be caught in the middle of one. Maybe while on supply runs one of them sneaks some alcohol, and they proceed to nearly kill Bolin when he suggests playing spin the bottle. Maybe they go skinny dipping in the lake. Maybe they find secluded spots to practice and figure out how their bending all works together. Maybe they try to figure out ways to hide the hickeys Suiren leaves on Kuvira. Maybe they make fun of how Green Opal become blushy messes near each other. Maybe if preserving secrecy and anonymity wasn't such a big concern they'd sneak off to attend festivals in small surrounding towns. Maybe after long days they collapse and sleep in one big pile together. And maybe the RL know full well what the five of them are doing, but given that they're anarchists and naturally lax with rules, they decide to just let them do what they want, all the while reminiscing on everything they got up to as teenagers.

The five of them are in their early to mid twenties and about to become the third generation of the Red Lotus setting out to try and change the world, hopefully with more success than their predecessors. But maybe, before they do, they'll get to act like dumb, careless teenagers like they were always meant to, just one last time.

[jo-com]

₊˚.🎧 ✩｡☕ ➛ So this is love?

Max Verstappen x Fem!Sainz reader

Summary: The man who always put racing above anything else; not even caring or investing about others because he thinks it’s a waste of time—What did you do to him to make him change his mind?

Genre: Cold!Max x Persistent!reader

Note: Grammatical errors and this is not proofread!! Enjoy thoo

✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧ ➛ My Masterlist

─────── ─ ꒰ᐢ. .ᐢ꒱₊˚💕 ─ ───────

Max stared blankly at his mates as he tuned out the noises that they spoke. His eyes narrowed and brows knitted in a frown— obviously not invested in their conversation.

“Yeah, she’ll be coming here, so be nice guys” Carlos spoke,his tone laced with a warning, glaring back at other drivers who he thinks will scare you off.

And of course he was staring directly at max.

Max cocked a brow,“What?”,he was clearly not listening to them, so why the hell are they looking at him?

The other driver rolled his eyes, “i said don’t be batshit crazy and be nice to my sister”.

“Crazy?” Max scoffed, “i don't even give a damn about her, so why do i have to be nice?.”

The room then fell quiet at his words; no one even muttered a single sound as the heavy atmosphere intoxicated them—awkwardness spreading across the drivers as they stare back and forth at each other.

For a whole five minutes, none of them had the courage to speak up and end the insufferable silence.

Not until Charles let out a scrappy cough, making the others sigh in relief from his boldness.

“Carlos didn’t mean it like that, he meant that you should just be a little nice, his sister's pretty sensitive, you see” Charles exclaimed, his voice shaking from the previous tension.

Max tutted in response, mumbling a low ‘whatever’ before standing up and leaving the Ferrari garage.

…

It was finally the day of your arrival, everybody were excited to meet the you… well almost everybody.

Max just slumped in the corner, his body leaning against the wall with his usual scowling face— avoiding others that tries to converse with him.

He was minding his own business and letting his mind wander off.

What’s so special about her that people kept fussing over her.

His train of thought quickly got interrupted as people swarmed the front door, their voices echoing and colliding with one another making a god awful sound.

He rolled his eyes with judgement as he stared abruptly at the doorframe— not even bothering to check or give the slightest interest on you.

But as you walked closer to his eye range, his breath seemed to hitch and his jaw slowly hung opened.

He doesn’t know how or why, but as soon as his eyes met yours it felt like his world suddenly turned in slowmo and all the others that surrounded you, now disappeared— it was like there were only the two of you.

Max never felt something like this before, it’s a weird and uncomfortable feeling. How the hell do you make it stop?

His once cold and composed look now turned into a love sick fool expression.

“Hey man you okay?” Logan asked, his tone dripped with pure concern over his fellow driver.

Max suddenly jumped from Logan’s presence. He never even saw that he came and leaned besides him. It was so unusual for him to be that unattentive.

Max lets out an awkward cough, “yeah, i am good, just looking like everyone else.”

“Looking? Dude you look like you want to get down on your knees for her” the other joked, easing up to max.

But to him it wasn’t a joke, he was conflicted on why he looked like that and was it obvious to everyone?. What the actual fuck is happening to him.

He then raised his hand and gently lay it to his forehead to check whether or not he has a fever. Damn no fever.

“Are you sure you’re okay?” Logan responded, his eyes curled into a soft concern gaze.

Max didn’t answer and flickered his eyes back to yours. His face suddenly heats up as you stare back and smile at him. Your smile that was radiant like the sun and eyes soft like sky.

After that short and subtle interaction, he can’t seem to keep his focus and just let his thoughts wander off that lead to that moment.

…

“You’re max right?” You greeted, tugging the excess hair to your side and smiling softly at him. Having him a clear view of your angelic appearance.

Max could feel his whole face being flushed, god he wishes you don’t notice, “uhm yeah” he spoke, his tone that was always high and mighty now turned into a low and shy ones.

You hummed in response and puckered your lips with a pop, “well I’ve been seeing you all day and you’re always avoiding me, is there something wrong?”

Max’s eyes widened, “no..i-uhm there’s-“ he stuttered; trying to find the right words but nothing came out right.

You examined his actions and then let out a few giggles at his antics. You didn’t understand why they call him mean, to you he was just adorable.

…

After that day, the two of you often hang out with each other and would hear whispers and murmurs about you guys, but always brushed it off and ignore people.

“Here try this max” you beamed, handing him the mango that you were holding— smiling from ear to ear as you share your favorite fruit to someone speacial. You loved mango, i mean how could you not? It’s tasty and delicious.

He gave you a look of uncertainty, he never liked mango, it’s weird looking and nothing will ever change his mind about it, even you.

But maybe one bite won’t hurt.

“Haha sure” he replied, taking the fruit from your hand and gently taking a bite out of it. He then gulped it down his throat and stared back at you— your eyes sparkled with joy and excitement, as you await for his response.

“It’s alright” he answered, giving you a thumbs up to which you retorted with a happy clap.

“Thank god you like it, I wasn’t sure whether or not you’d like one of my favorite fruits”

Hmm maybe mangoes aren’t that bad.

…

It didn’t take long before max realized how inlove he was with you and as soon as he did, he asked to court you.

Of course you agreed to it, you as well fell for him but you also wanted to get the approval of both your parents and brother.

That’s why Max took it upon himself to make your parents like him, though he knew that the real obstacle was Carlos.

“So, you’re telling me that you want to date my sister?” Carlos asked, his voice dripped with sarcasm and anger.

Max smiled nonchalantly, “yes”

“You want to date her with that attitude?” Carlos spat, his teeth gritted with each word.

“Yes” he answered again bluntly.

He was getting on Carlos nerves and you could tell.

“Haha uhm Max can you come here for a sec?” You laughed dryly, grabbing Max’s sleeves and dragging him to the side.

“What did we talk about? I told you to be nice” you scolded, rubbing the bridge of your nose to ease your stress.

“I was being nice” max grumbled, his brows knitted in a frown out of habit.

Unbeknownst to them, Carlos was in the sidelines listening, laughing silently at his fellow driver, ‘hehe he’s done for, he never admits his mistake and apologize’ he thought.

“Sorry, I’ll try okay?” Max mumbled, making you smile and kiss his cheeks in response.

Carlo’s jaw dropped, What the fuck, why was THE max verstappen apologizing, is this real??

The two of them came back hand in hand and faced Carlos once again.

“I am sorry for being rude, and yes i am dating her so please approve”.

Carlos was still in shock, never in his life had he seen Max act like a puppy and apologize to anyone.

“No uhm it’s okay we’re good” he replied, his voice shaky from disbelief.

So that’s what max is like when inlove. Damn he’s like a lost puppy.

…

Sorry for not uploading too much🥹🥹 I’ve been busy but i hope you enjoyed this!!💋

[formulawolff]

vii. the in-between - t.w.

pairing: female driver! x toto wolff

word count: 5.2k

warnings: buckle up y’all cause we go. angst, cursing, size kink, edging, praise kink, FUCKING, LOTS OF FUCKING. toto being a simp, banter, yearning, mentions of divorce, mentions of alcohol use, creampie, teasing, yadayadayada… y’all know what’s about to go down

prev. | next.

“it’s fine, mom. really.” 

bringing a hand to your temple, you begin to massage, attempting to alleviate the accumulated pressure. 

“i mean, yeah, i’m not in trouble or anything. as far as i know, the fia is letting me race in suzuka. it was my first offense so they dropped the investigation. as long as i publicly apologize for my actions, everything will be cleared up.” 

˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖

do you know how many people have asked me about you? baby, people approach me at the goddamn grocery store asking me why you beat up that poor little british boy! he’s built like a twig for god’s sake! 

rolling your eyes, you lean back in your chair, keeping the phone pressed against your ear, “mom, his name is george russell. he drives for mercedes. he’s not some little boy.” 

all right, all right. well maybe he needs to come over for some dinner or something. get some meat on those bones. anyway, did i tell you that your father has been scouring ebay trying to purchase sports cards with your car on it? well, he’s found ones with you on them too. he wants to make a booklet of his favorite kiddo. 

with that discovery, your heart swells, “is he really? tell him to look up topps chrome cards. those are the best ones. since i’m not as popular as max or lewis, they should be pretty cheap. and mom, i’m your only kiddo.” 

that’s why we’re so proud of you. even if you get into fist fights, we still love you bunches. when do you think you’ll come home? your dad wants to take you out in his baby. he’s made some modifications to it. he thinks you’ll appreciate it more than i will. 

“where is dad? is he asleep?” 

yes honey. he’s asleep. snoring away on the couch with the dogs. i wish we could give you a taste of home somehow. maybe i could have a care package sent to japan? 

“mom,” you exhale, “that would be so much money. don’t worry about it. were you guys considering flying out for miami?” 

oh yes, about that! you perk up in your chair, anticipating your mom’s response. we are going to be there. we can’t wait to see you. we miss you so much. it’s so quiet when you’re not home. will i be able to meet some of your coworkers? 

letting you a giggle, you shake your head, “mom. they’re my fellow drivers. we’re not coworkers. but yeah, i could probably introduce you to a few of them. daniel wants to meet you two.” 

what about that handsome fellow with the bright blue eyes? he drives for redbull! and yes, i would love to meet daniel. 

“max verstappen?” you arch a brow, “we’d have to see about that one. he’s a very busy man.” 

okay, okay. the line cuts out briefly. hey honey, i think i need to head to bed. i love you so much. keep in touch, okay? we’ll see you in a few short weeks. 

nibbling on your lower lip, you nod, “i love you too, mom. tell dad i love him. i miss you guys. i can’t wait to see you.” 

me either. goodnight honey, or good morning or afternoon or whatever time it is over there. i’ll text you when i wake up! love you. 

“love you,” your lip trembles, hands clamming up as you the line goes silent. 

fuck, were you homesick. 

you just had to make it a few more weeks. then, you could finally reunite with your parents in miami. although you knew you would be so fucking busy, you would make time. 

you always did when it came to your parents. 

also, you had another plan brewing as you scroll through your contact list, searching for a certain dutch assassin. a certain dutch man who happened to be a three-time world champion. 

somehow, someway, your mom was going to meet max verstappen. 

you had to make that happen. 

you had to. 

currently, you were sitting on the edge of a bed in a suite in london, anxiously awaiting the arrival of your driver. a decently-sized suitcase sat near the door, a carry-on stacked on top. 

this driver was provided specific instructions to transport you from london to brackley, dropping you off at the door of a certain team principal’s home. 

yet, you were well aware that it wasn’t going to be just any old home. 

this man was billionaire, after all. 

buzzing in your grasp, your phone notifies you of a new text. 

from none other than toto wolff. 

the driver is on the elevator, heading up towards your suite. DO NOT handle your bags. he will do that for you. i don’t want you to fuss over a single thing. from there, he will bring you here, where he will punch in the code for the gate. i will be waiting for you at the door. 

i can’t wait to see you, schatzi. i miss your beautiful face and sweet laughter. 

oh, and i can’t wait to kiss you. 

(and yes, i am pacing around in my office as i type this. i can’t focus on anything else but your arrival) 

with sazuka quickly approaching next week, you would only have a couple of days with the team principal before you had to part ways. he would have prep, meetings, press, where he would then fly out to sazuka. meanwhile, you would have to catch a flight, meet with your team, prep, and potentially meet with press, fans, and the other drivers. 

additionally, you had to address the incident that occurred last week at the australian grand prix. to your surprise, the fia had dismissed the investigation, finding no substantial evidence that the two of you needed to be punished. due to the nature of the accident, george was not punished, as he did no illegal maneuvers or intentionally attempted to take you out of the race. 

on the other hand, the fia was adamant that if this happened again, you were going to face consequences. you would have to shell out a pretty penny for fines, and then you would be immediately disqualified from three future races, deeming you unable to participate.

although they were merciful, the fia made it very clear that since it was your first offense, they were going to be fair.. 

however, if there was a next time, they would not be so kind. 

a crisp knock rang out, startling you. 

springing to your feet, you open the door, an older man smiling in greeting. 

“you must be golden girl,” sticking out his right hand, he dips his head, “i’m theodore. i’ll be your driver to brackley this evening. i am here to not only be your escort, but to tend to anything you may need. mr. wolff made it very clear that you were not to fret over a single thing.”

“good morning,” the corners of your lips curl into a quaint smile as you shake his hand, “thank you. i’m eager to see the english countryside.”

“i’ll handle your bags ma’am,” theodore clears his throat, “you just take it easy.”

“will do,” you nod, “how long is the drive?”

“about an hour and a half,” theodore responds curtly, slinging your carry-on around his shoulder, “don’t worry, it’s not too boring. follow me this way, my lady. our chariot awaits!”

following him down the hall, he presses the button for the elevator. there’s a silence between you, but not an uncomfortable one. theodore’s presence was warm, inviting even.

upon meeting him, you understood why he was toto’s right-hand driver. once he escorted you to the car, he opens the door for you, ushering you inside. when you settle into the backseat, you notice the glint of a redbull can, along with your favorite snacks and candy. 

“mr. wolff wanted to ensure you wouldn’t be hungry,” theodore states as he climbs into the driver’s seat, pressing the button for the ignition, “he told me that you can be a little cranky if you don’t have any snacks.”

“oh? he said that?” a giggle bubbles up in your throat, “did he say anything else about me?”

“oh yes,” theodore chuckles, turning the gear shift, “he’s told me all about you. to be quite frank, he hasn’t shut up about you the last week or so.”

“so you know who i am?”

“of course i do,” theodore nods, flashing you a grin in the rearview mirror, “you’re one of the best formula one drivers on the grid. you drive for williams racing. you’ve only won one grand prix, but i believe you’ll win a few more this season. your hometown is in yuma, arizona. you’re twenty-two years old, and from what toto has shared with me, you have a very bright future ahead.”

“are you a formula one fan?” you arch a brow, punching open the can of redbull. 

“who isn’t?” he shrugs, “well, ms. golden girl, we are going to begin our journey. if you need anything, please don’t hesitate to speak up. if you’d like, you can tell me a little bit more about yourself. we will have plenty of time.”

as theodore promised, the drive to brackley was painless. yet, as the car pulls up to the gate, your heart skips a beat.

this was no quaint english cottage.

toto’s brackley residence was a sleek and sprawling two-story home, a black and white exterior with massive, thick windows. your jaw almost drops, and theodore notices, letting out a hearty laugh, “don’t act so shocked, golden girl. i’m sure you’re aware toto is a very wealthy man.”

“i thought he would have kept things somewhat simple.”

“oh love,” theodore shakes his head, “you and i both know that toto is anything but simple.”

rolling down the window, theodore punches in a code, the gate sliding open. as the car lurches up the drive, your heart thumps in your rib-cage, blood roaring in your ears. 

this was really happening. 

you were really staying with toto. 

“nervous?” theodore senses the shift in energy, “you have no reason to be nervous. he’s been anticipating your arrival. he’ll be happy to see you.”

“thank you,” you manage to muster a meek smile, “i-i just didn’t think we would get this far.”

“well savor the time together. time flies, especially in our world. one day you’re at a track, the next you’re in another country. he adores you, golden girl. so don’t you fret about that. just relax, and enjoy your time. i will be here in a couple of days to bring you to the airport for your departure to sazuka.” 

“thank you,” at his words, you can’t help but let out a sigh of relief, “i look forward to our next drive together!”

“as do i,” shifting the gears, theodore puts the car in park, slipping out of the driver’s seat, “we have arrived. let me get your bags.”

he strolls over to your door, opening it as you clamber out, stretching your sore legs.

no matter how much time you spent in a car, there was always that persisting stiffness. 

you’d probably need a double-knee replacement by the time you were forty, but that was the least of your worries. 

out of the corner of your eye, you notice a figure strolling towards the car. with the large stature, you knew it could only be one particular individual. 

he’s dressed in a royal blue button-up, paired with khaki slacks. on his feet are earth-toned dress shoes. the blue hue of the button-up complements his dark hair, almost brightening his features, giving them a youthful glow. tufts of his hair are all over as the wind blows. 

yet, he looks as gorgeous as ever, his toned muscles rippling under the thin fabric of the button-up. 

“welcome to brackley schatzi,” the grin enveloping his face is radiant, “i hope the drive wasn’t too bad.”

“not at all,” you shake your head, the team principal nearly sucking the wind out of your lungs as he wraps his arms around you, squishing you against his chest. 

“i missed you so much,” tender lips connect with your cheek, “good afternoon, theo! did she behave herself?”

“of course,” theodore promptly places your bag next to the entrance, suitcase in tow, “i have another commitment here soon, mr. wolff. i hope it is all right i placed her bags next to the door?” 

“don’t worry about it,” toto’s fingers find yours, intertwining them together, “i’ll get them. please drive safe, theo.”

“i will, mr. wolff,” theodore dips his head, turning to you, he takes your hand, shaking it, “it was lovely to meet you. i look forward to our next meeting, golden girl. enjoy your time together, you two!”

“we will,” toto squeezes your hand, “goodbye, theo.”

“goodbye, mr. wolff!” theodore spins on his heel, making his way to the car, “behave, you two!”

in response, toto gives a thumbs up, theodore slipping back into the driver’s seat. as he peels off, toto shifts his body, facing you.

“charming, isn’t he?”

“he’s great! kept me entertained the whole drive!”

“i told him you have a short attention span so to keep you occupied,” toto shooks you a wink, earning an eye roll. 

“i can’t stand you.”

“you’re standing right now, aren’t you?” his chuckle is light, “come, let’s head on in. i have lunch waiting for us.”

“you made me lunch?” 

“yes, i’m going to drive you all the way out here just so starve you,” he scoffs, yet his tone says otherwise, “i have food ready. and wine, if you want some.”

“don’t tell me you want to get me drunk so i’ll confess all my secrets.”

“consider that my new goal for the afternoon,” toto grabs your bag, along with your suitcase. pushing open the door, he clears his throat, “welcome to my home away from home.”

as you step in the entrance, your eyes widen, lips parting.  

the space was truly a reflection of toto. refined and elegant, with a hints of charm. the marble floors gleam under the soft lighting, rays of sun shining through the vast windows. the walls were covered in a menagerie of decor, from pieces of art to mercedes memorabilia. it was not the typical billionaire’s home, where the air felt sterile and cold. 

this place was warm and full of life, coaxing you to stay. 

“cat got your tongue?” his breath fans against your ear, a hand gliding along your back, “follow me, schatzi.”

“your home is beautiful.”

glancing over his shoulder, you are met with his gorgeous smile, dimples and all, “thank you, love. i’m glad you like it.”

trailing behind the austrian, you stroll down a long hallway, turning into the last room on the left. toto places your bag and suitcase next to a glass door, “this is my bedroom. you’ll be staying here with me.”

“straight to the bedroom huh?” you fold your arms across your chest, teasing, “you just couldn’t wait–”

“come here,” toto growls, hands grasping your wrists, bringing you in, “no, i can’t wait.”

looking up, you match his gaze, cocking your head, “what are you going to do about it?”

at your rebuttal, toto’s eyes narrow, “what do you think i’m going to do?”

“fuck me.”

“hmmmm,” he hums, leaning in, “you’re right, schatzi. i am going to fuck you. i’m going to fuck you till you’re weeping me for me to stop.”

“weeping?” your hands roam, tugging on his button-up, “i’d like to see you try.”

“oh schatzi,” he tsks, “you don’t know what you’re in for.”

“show me then.”

“i will,” lips ghost over yours, “i’ll show you how badly i missed you baby.”

as he kisses you, it’s tender at first, brimmed with the sweetness of reunion. one of his hands wraps around the base of your neck, tilting your head back as his tongue gains access to your mouth, the tang of redbull tracing your mouth. yet, as you whimper, a fiery hunger sets ablaze.

fuck, he missed you. 

he missed you more than he liked to admit.

tension hangs thick, clouding the space as his mouth places sloppy, wet kisses down your jawline, finding your neck. nipping gently, it takes every fiber in his being to resist the urge to just mark you all over. to leave marks where they could see. to make them wonder who was doing this to you.

but he couldn’t. not there. 

in response, your hips buck forward, grinding against his. toto groans, his head rolling back. 

there was not a single coherent thought in his mind. 

only lust. and fuck, was it consuming him whole. 

scooping you into his arms, he brings you over to the bed, your back meeting with the plush mattress. 

“i can’t wait,” he pants, chest heaving, “i can’t wait any longer. i need you.”

“then take me,” your words drip like honey, oh so sweet, “make me yours, toto.”

jesus fucking christ.

he was going to fuck the shit out of you. right here, right now.

there was no going back. 

he ached for it. he yearned for it. the fantasy flooded his dreams at night.

the things he wanted to do to you? 

downright filthy. sinful, even 

he couldn’t lose his inhibitions. not yet. he had to hang on. 

however, at this point, toto was hanging on by a thread. 

peeling your leggings and panties off, he tosses them to the floor, “sit up.”

you obey, nearly trembling with anticipation as fingertips hook the hem of your crewneck, pulling it over your head. nimbly, he hovers over you, finding the clasps of your bra. he undoes them, a crimson hue dusting his cheeks as he takes in the sight of you completely naked beneath him. 

god, you were absolutely breathtaking. 

every inch of you was stunning. every scar. every mole. every freckle. every stretch mark. 

you were so fucking beautiful. 

his hands fly to his button-up, eager for what was to come. 

yet, your hands find his, “let me.”

toto bites his tongue as you carefully undo the buttons of his shirt, his cock twitching, aching for your touch as your fingers delve towards his belt. you unbuckle it, tilting your head back, batting your thick lashes.

fuck. fuck. fuck. 

could this moment last forever? 

“toto.”

“yes?”

“i-i don’t know if i can take it all,” there’s apprehension inflected in your tone, almost as if you were embarrassed, “to be honest, i’ve never–”

oh god. 

this was going to ruin him.

just like he was going to ruin you.

“don’t worry,” a tender hand cups your cheek, the pad of his thumb caressing your cheekbone, “i’ll go slow. i won’t make you take it all. i’ll take care of you baby, i promise.”

you nod, lips pursed as you tug on his slacks, hooking the hem of his boxers, “you’re just so fucking big. like holy shit.”

pride swells within the austrian for a moment, a chuckle rumbling in his chest, “i promise you that it’s not as big as you think.”

“can i see for myself?” the question is so innocent, so pure. 

yeah, he was going to ruin you.

he was going to make a mess out of you. 

“lay down schatzi,” he orders, authority oozing into the words. 

kicking off his slacks, he curses slightly as his boxers stick around one of his ankles. this wasn’t going to be perfect, but he wanted it to be. for you. 

he wanted this to be a moment you remembered for the rest of your life. he wanted this memory to fill your thoughts every second of every day. he wanted you to touch yourself to this, desperate and oh so wet, throbbing for him. yearning for his mouth. for his touch. for him.

carefully, he climbs onto the bed, hovering over you. as you look down, you can feel his gaze searing into you, burning right through. 

his cock was far bigger than your fantasies. it was thick, approximately eight or nine inches. you couldn’t tell. his tip was tinged pink, the glisten of precum catching in the light. veins wrapped around the length, throbbing as your hand wrapped around its base.

“fuck,” as he moans, you lick your lips, realizing how much you loved the sound that just filled your ears, “let me feel you, please.”

“please toto.”

swallowing thickly, he inhales sharply as he positions his tip at your entrance. applying pressure, a whimper rings out as he pushes in, your walls stretching. 

your pussy was heaven. absolutely perfect as it wrapped around his cock, begging for more as he pushed further and further. you were absolutely drenched, the juices slick and oh so sickeningly sweet. he didn’t even have to taste you to know. he just knew you were sweet. like pure ambrosia. 

perhaps he could get a taste.

“toto,” your lashes flutter, his name so perfect from your lips, “you feel–”

“your pussy is perfect,” he finds a steady rhythm, pumping in and out of your tight hole, “absolutely perfect baby. fuck, you’re perfect.”

skin connects with skin, the temperature of the room elevated as his hands found yours, pinning them to the bed. lips collide, the kisses desperate, hungry and bursting with need. as he picks up the pace, moans fill his mouth. 

fuck, it felt like he was going to split you into two. 

“t-toto,” there it was again, his name. music to his ears.

“yes baby?” a sheen of sweat clings to his forehead, tufts of hair dampened, “what is it? does it hurt? do you need me to slow down?”

“no. fuck me. just fuck me.”

oh god. 

oh, fuck. 

his cock twitches, the pleasure building in your abdomen as the tip brushes your g-spot, back arching, begging to be closer. closer to him.

could you be any closer to him in this moment? was it even possible?

before you know it, his arms wrap around your frame, picking you up off the mattress. he holds you close to his chest, one hand holding your head, cupping the back of your skull. the other remains on your lower back, gripping you tightly as the new angle sends bliss rippling all throughout your body.

he fucks you, and god there was no holding back. his cock was pounding into you now, showing no mercy. your ass slaps against his thighs, filthy noises flooding the space. 

as you bounce, you tense, your walls practically squeezing him, “toto, oh my god, i’m going–”

“good girl,” his coos, “be a good girl, baby. cum for me.”

as you get closer and closer, toto watches. fuck, the way your lips were parted ever so slightly. the way hairs clung to your forehead. the way your lashes fluttered. all he could see was pleasure. pure, intense pleasure. 

you unravel, coming undone. 

that sight alone was enough to make him cum.

“come here,” toto hisses through gritted teeth, “come here baby.”

the moment his lips mold with yours, you feel his cock throb, pumping threads of cum into your weeping hole. your muscles spasm, shuddering as he pulls out. 

the two of you study one another for a moment, catching your breath. fingertips brush stray hairs from your temple. 

“i’m sorry.”

“for?” you nuzzle into his collarbone, relishing the way his cologne lingered, mixing with his natural scent. 

“going too far.”

“that was not too far.”

tenderly, the austrian pulls you down with him, letting out a sigh as his head hits the pillow. your head remains against his chest, admiring the definition and tone for a moment. he peppers kisses along your forehead, browbone, and cheeks. 

“if i ever go too far, let me know.”

“i think we’re both in too deep,” you murmur, “you’re lucky you had the blinds drawn.” 

“that would be something,” his chest vibrates as he speaks, “could you imagine? some random mercedes intern witnessing the team principal fucking the most beautiful woman on the planet?”

however, a gleam catches your eye.

on his left ring finger, your heart sinks as you notice the ring. 

his wedding band.

toto senses your silence, the way you tensed up against him, “what is it schatzi?”

“why are you still wearing your wedding band?”

oh, so you had noticed.

“it’s complicated.”

“complicated?” your voice falters as you prop yourself up with your elbow so you could meet his gaze, “you’re wearing your fucking wedding ring. it’s not that complicated.”

“yes, i am, wearing my ring,” he exhales, “would you prefer me to take it off? it has no meaning anymore. susie and i are divorced. we finalized it last december. when we signed the papers, we made a mutual agreement to wear our wedding bands when we were in the public eye. it keeps the speculations at bay. it’s mostly for the sake of my children. and for her sake. we respect one another and i would hate for her hard work to be diminished by rumors and gossip.”

although his words were sincere, your heart races still, anxiety a swirling torrent in your stomach, “how long have you been separated?”

“almost three years. we separated in july of 2021.” 

“oh,” you suck in a breath, shame washing over you, “i-i’m sorry for the sudden questions. i just–”

“it would complicate your feelings for me. and no one wants too mess around with a married man. i get it baby, i really do.”

although he provided a very base-level explanation of his failed marriage, toto was more than willing to go into more depth. that is, if you wanted. more than anything, he wanted you to know. that aspect was becoming increasingly frustrating, as the team principal tried to maintain that dominant, bold, persona.

you were making him weak. his little soft spot. 

well, not so little these days. 

“i cannot stand how well you read me,” rolling your eyes, you turn your back to him.

“don’t turn your back on me now,” he tsks, “do you believe me, schatzi?”

“i don’t think you could ever lie to me.”

“i couldn’t,” toto leans over, placing soft kisses all over your shoulders, “i think it would destroy me. the guilt would be too much to bear.”

“if we’re spilling secrets now,” you roll over, face-to-face once again, “i have another question for you.”

“all right.”

“why did you approach james about my contract behind my back?” 

for once, the team principal is caught by surprise, his heart skipping a beat. 

the hurt plastered across your features is clear, your brows furrowed, eyes narrowed. there’s a glimmer of anguish in their depths, slightly glossy from the threat of tears. 

“i wanted to gauge how he felt if you were to leave williams,” that was the truth, really, no other intentions behind it, “he was not too keen to discuss it, but i just wanted to know how upset he would be if you were to sign with another team. i did it for you, to soften the blow.”

“soften the blow?”

“yes,” toto nods, “to soften the blow when you tell him you’re leaving williams and signing with mercedes.”

“you don’t know that for–”

“but i do,” his voice hardens, “i do know. we can’t just lay here and deny that in your heart, you want to be with me at mercedes. you’ve made the decision already. you just haven’t figured out how you’re going to approach james, alex, or your team.”

biting your tongue, you turn your head, averting his gaze.

toto was right. you had made your decision. 

it was just a matter of time before you had to face the facts. 

“i’m right, aren’t i?” 

“you are,” you huff, squeezing your eyes shut, “i-i just don’t know how to tell everyone. i don’t know how to tell my parents. i don’t know how to bring it up to james. it’s just so.. fuck. it’s so fucking overwhelming to think about.”

“then let me help you.”

“how?” you inquire, “how would you possibly do that?”

“i’ll keep my distance from here on out, but i will help you draft up a letter that you can give to james. or, i can help you practice what you’re going to say. just let me help you schatzi,” fingers grasp your chin, turning your head. 

“you hear me? i’ll help you.”

“can we just worry about it later?” 

“of course,” strong arms envelop your frame, drawing you in against his body, “for now, we can snuggle. would you like that?”

“i would.”

your tough exterior completely crumbles as his mouth hovers by your ear, murmuring words in german. desperately, you ache to know what he said. was it something important? or just sweet nothings? 

sometimes he was a difficult man to decipher.

“hey, have you opened that gift yet? the one i brought to you in jeddah?”

“no,” you admit, heat billowing into your cheeks, “i have a hard time accepting gifts.”

“clearly.”

before you can respond, he’s up from the bed, strolling over to your bags. unzipping your carry-on, he searches for that parcel. fishing it out of your bag, he sets in on the bed, sliding on his boxers before plopping it in front of you.

“open it. right now.”

“right now?” you echo, “toto, i–”

“open it.”

“fine,” nimbly, your fingers untie the bow, peeling away the wrapper. 

underneath the paper, there is a tiny velvet box. it’s long and slender, rectangular in shape.

“what is this?”

“open it and you’ll know,” toto urges, following your every move, anticipating your reaction.

opening the box, your heart swells at the sight before you.

it’s a bracelet, a dainty figaro chain, complete with a charm. the charm is an outline of the saudi arabian track. picking it up, you inspect it, noticing a date engraved on the backside of the charm. 

“how were you able to get this so quickly after the race?” 

“i have my ways,” toto bears a sheepish grin, “do you like it?”

“like it? i love it.”

well, you didn’t love it. you fucking adored it. it was perfect, and so you. it was something that you could wear everyday, a constant reminder of the years of effort to get you here. not to mention it was gorgeous, the chain shiny, freshly polished. 

a hand reaches out, plucking the chain from the box. his brows are knit together with concentration as he slips the chain around your wrist, ensuring it’s safely clasped.

“i figured it would be something you could always wear. a reminder of when you made history.”

“it’s beautiful,” sitting up, you shift your weight to your knees as you wrap your arms around his neck, “thank you, toto.”

“always, schatzi. don’t worry, i will always spoil you.”

as toto nuzzles into the crook of your neck, he was well aware of one thing.

you had made your decision. 

you hadn’t outright said it, but he knew you made your decision. 

you would be signing to mercedes for the 2025 season. 

you were finally going to be by his side every day. 

there was no more in-between. no more will she or won’t she. no more nights of him lying awake, wondering where you stood. no more driving himself insane pondering all of the possibilities that could unravel. 

he had you. 

you were all his now. 

and god, did that leave such a sweet taste in his mouth. 

˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖✩₊˚.⋆☾⋆⁺₊✧˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖

taglist: @joalslibrary @martwll @prettiest-at-the-party @pucksandpower @kravitzwhore @toldyouitwasamelodrama @annewithaneofthegreengable @persona1lies @zoeyjadetice2010 @whoisss @sinners-98-world

if i missed anyone, please let me know! also, you are more than welcome to be added to the taglist! thank you for reading! <3

[stall1iion]

champions love - six

liked by maxverstappen1, logansargeant, bsf1, bsf2, and many others 

y/n.jpg nice to be back home for the weekend

tagged: bsf1, bsf2

view all comments

logansargeant happy fourth y/n 💀🤣

⤷y/n.jpg Logan! Pull up man

⤷logansargeant am I being invited to the cookout?

⤷y/n.jpg I- 💀🤣sure Logan, just text me 

bsf1 we look so hot omg 😍🥵

⤷y/n.jpg we do 🤭

⤷bsf2 was that even a question? 🤭🤭

lilymhe 😔i miss you wifey  

⤷y/n.jpg i miss you too! Don’t worry I’ll be back next week 🫶🏾

⤷alexalbon um? Wifey? 😐

⤷y/n.jpg call me Mr. Steal your bitch 😋

maxverstappen1 will you bring me back some food? 

⤷y/n.jpg so needy 🙄😂 yeah I’ll bring you a plate but you do know you could just come? 

⤷maxverstappen1 oh- you so right 

username5 happy Fourth of July Y/n! 

username9 omg will we potentially get pictures of Logan finally being around people who care about him? 

⤷username12 💀moot what you being messy for? 

username7 stop this friend group is so hot and for what? 

liked by maxverstappen1, logansargeant, f1wags, and many others

y/n.jpg no one told me I would be dealing with two unhinged blondes 😭😞free me 

tagged: bsf1, bsf2, logansargeant 

view all comments 

bsf2 we are not unhinged 

⤷logansargeant agreed 😁

⤷bsf1 yes you two are 

⤷y/n.jpg you both decided it would be a good idea to climb into a baby swing and got stuck 💀😐

⤷logansargeant that did not happen?? 

⤷y/n.jpg tell that to the fire station that cut you out 💀

username4 omg 🤣he actually pulled up 

maxverstappen1 help is on the way dear!! 

⤷y/n.jpg did you just 😍quote a meme to me 🤭

⤷logansargeant oh good god 💀plz keep this pg 13 there’s kids on here 

⤷y/n.jpg girl…fuck them kids 🤭and fuck you too 🖕🏾

username7 and where’s max? Like how is some guy who can't even drive around my girl alone?

⤷username88 ooo yeah it's giving insecure, good luck to any person you date

username76 are we just going to ignore that Logan and Ashley got stuck in a baby swing 💀

⤷username103 and the fire department had to cut them out 💀

⤷logansargeant yes

⤷bsf2 yes we are

username9 see if I was max i wouldn’t let some guy be all cozy with my girl like that 

⤷username5 friend what are you talking about? What cozying you see bc i see logan getting cozy with Ashley if that’s what you mean 

username2 so um, anyone else getting chemistry from Logan and her best friend??

⤷username10 oh my god yes, thank you, I thought I was the only one 😭

⤷username23 stop 😵i hope not, they lowkey look like siblings 

⤷username55 STOP WHY WOULD YOU SAY THAT LMAO??

53,351 likes 

y/n.jpg Proud to have introduced the boys to the y/n version of 7/4 🫡happy 7/4 to america 💋

view all comments 

username7 NOT AMERICAN BUT HAPPY 4TH OF JULY! 

username9 not the max picture cuz ppl was talking shit on the last photo 💀

⤷username2 logan looks like he’s either third wheeling or being babysat 💀😂

username10 HAPPY 7/4

username4 HAPPY 7/4

username33 HAPPY 7/4

username69 HAPPY 7/4

username74 HAPPY 7/4

username99 RAWWWW 🦅HAPPY INDEPENDENCE TO THE BEST COUNTRY 

⤷username98 they gon get you girl but real💀

bsf1 AHHH WE LOOK SO GOOD IN THE LAST PHOTO, W AURAAAAAA

bsf2 WHERE ARE YOU?? WE’RE TRYING TO TAKE A TRIO PIC WITH THE FIREWORKS?? 

⤷bsf1 OH MY GOD TURN AROUND!!! 

⤷username77 WHAT’S GOING ON?? WHAT ARE WE MISSING?? 

⤷username61 SHOW IT TO US PLEASE!! SHOW IT TO US RACHEL! 

caption: look at these lovebirds over here 💀

⤷bsf1 she’s gonna kill you once she sees this 

⤷bsf2 she was the one who kissed him 💀and she can’t even lie and say she was possibly drunk this time 

⤷bsf2 miss “I don’t date drivers” 

comments 

F1lover stop ✋ maybe she’s just busy and will fly in the day of the race

loveuy/n she looks good tho 😭what was she even doing??

lo3vmax maybe she has practice? 

⤷mrssainz yeah but max hasn’t said anything about her not coming yet 

y/nhater I don’t know maybe she finally realized their little pr relationship isn’t working anymore 

winter<3 she looks really hungover, maybe she was waiting before flying so she wouldn’t have to deal with that

→ DUH DUH DUH!!! We have names for our best friends now! 💀(I did not mean for that to happen lol) 

→ If you want, we can vote on the other best friend’s name! Send in a request for names and we can poll!! 

Anyways back to normal programing 

→ Yes the cookout is a reference to a black cookout but you can take that as a normal bbq 

→ Logan x Ashley? 👀we’ll see 

→ Logan is officially a part of the gang yay!!  

→ Yes, Y/N did in fact block Max after the kiss (she left immediately and screamed in her pillow for at least 30 minutes) 

→ Is Y/n going to Silverstone?? I guess we’ll never know…..jk you’ll know in the next chapter mwah 💋

Author’s note! 

I finished this up faster than I thought I would 💀I originally planned to wait till July 4th to actually post this but then I was like…nahhhh next chapter will have the race, max and y/n talking (more denial yay! 😁) I now get why writers love the good old miscommunication, it’s so much fun to write 😈 

taglist: @boiohboii @ale-522 @ietss @theseerbetweenus @jaxx-7 @sainzluvrr @the-untamed-soul @ashy-kit @hc-dutch @nichmeddar @delululeclerc @sweate-r-weathe-r @dhanihamidi @tellybearryyyy @luvsforme @samantha-chicago @theblueblub

༉‧₊˚  CHAMPIONS LOVE ༉‧₊˚

⤷ Following the messy breakup between Max Verstappen and Kelly Piquet, Max’s manager comes up with a solution to divert the attention – a fake relationship. His new girlfriend? Two time olympic gold medalist figure skater, y/n for the USA team. Easy? Well…

[forzalando]

💛 hi 🥹 CONGRATS ON 3K THAT'S HUUUUUGE !!!!

I am obsessed with this idea and also my favourite activity (as of recently lmao) is drunk karaoke and of COURSE my dream would be to do it with lando !!!!

drunk karaoke with Lando would, and i'm not exaggerating, mean everything to me. i am in love with just the idea of this.

thank you for supporting me through the many phases of this blog and for entertaining my every thought/idea. adore you, mel💛 i hope you enjoy this blurb that was meant to be 300-400 words but ended up being 800+ lol

celebration post: here

Drunk Karaoke with Lando Norris under the cut😊

You quickly downed the shot thrust into your hand – sambuca, which meant it absolutely came from Lando since he was the only one who knew of your preference.  

He was on your left, sweaty and somehow wide awake despite the fact you’d been out for hours. Oscar was on your right, slowly swaying to the music with his eyes half shut. Somewhere across the club Charles and Pierre were dancing on an elevated surface while George videotaped them like a suburban soccer mom at her son’s first game. Here in Monaco, everyone partied post-race as if they themselves had made it to the top step over the weekend.

Out of nowhere, Lando fell into you as he shouted in your ear – “Do you know what I’ve always wanted to do?”

Oscar caught you before you could topple over, steadying you on your feet before shooting Lando a dirty look.

“Sorry, sorry,” Lando giggled. He centered himself and then put his hands on your shoulders, looking the most serious you’d ever seen him. “Anyway, do you know what I’ve always wanted to do?”

“Win at Silverstone? Become world champion?”

“Well, yes, but think smaller, you lunatic. Something I could do right now.”

“Out drink Max?”

“What? No, I don’t care about outdrinking Max, where did that come from?”

“Well, I just thought since he usually wins every race that you’d want to beat him at something – ”

“Oh my god, you’re impossible,” Oscar interjected. “He wants to do drunk karaoke. When we went out in Miami he was practically on his knees begging me to sing with him.”

A giant grin spread across your face as you playfully swatted Lando’s chest.

“Why didn’t you just say so? I happen to be an excellent karaoke partner,” you boasted.

Lando clapped his hands and jumped around like a toddler at your remark – “So, you’ll do it with me?”

Instead of answering, you snatched his hand and pulled him through the club at an impressive speed. You weren’t in a karaoke bar, quite far from it, but you planted yourself in front of the DJ booth and gestured to Lando. Security immediately pulled you both into the booth, perks of having Lando at your side, and the DJ of the night asked what she could do for you.

“Hi! Lando Norris wants to do drunk karaoke and I’m trusting that you can make that happen. It’s very important to him,” you professed.

“I think I might have a couple instrumentals or could make some magic happen. Any specific requests? You won’t have any lyrics on screen, though. And you’ll have to share a mic.”

Before you could ask what your options were, Lando was shouting, once again, in your ear.

“DO YOU HAVE THE SPICE GIRLS? THAT ONE SPICE GIRLS SONG?”

“Lando, we won’t have the lyrics,” you reminded him.

“I don’t need them,” he declared, crossing his arms with attitude. “Maybe you need them, fake fan.”

“I most certainly do not,” you yelled back to Lando. “DJ, roll the track. Pretty please. You're amazing."

She chuckled and handed you the singular mic, Lando immediately snatching it from your hands.

“It’s my dream, I get to hold the mic.”

You rolled your eyes and fought back a smile, stepping into his side as he threw an arm around you.

The deafening bass from the speakers grew quiet as the DJ addressed the crowd of people – “we’ve got a special surprise tonight! These two lovely friends of mine up here are going to perform a special number for everyone. Please welcome – ”

She paused, waiting for you and Lando to introduce yourselves.

“LANDO NORRIS AND Y/N Y/L/N.”

“Please welcome Lando Norris and Y/N Y/L/N to my booth. Show them some love!”

The clapping and cheering brought the volume in the club back to an obscene level – the loudest cheers coming from a VIP table not far from the booth where all of your friends had gathered.

Before you had a chance to feel the slightest bit self-conscious, the infamous laugh rang through the speakers and Lando was scream-singing into the mic.

 “YO, I’LL YOU WHAT I WANT, WHAT I REALLY, REALLY WANT!”

The two of you in perfect sync, passing lines back and forth, singing (if you could call it that) in unison during the chorus. You could have sworn you heard George shout out that this was “his song” and Max was most definitely telling anyone who would listen that he personally knows Ginger Spice.  

You tore your eyes from the audience to look at Lando – the smile on his face rivaling the brightest sunny day. With his arm around you, squeezing you to his side, your closest friends cheering for you, your heart was sure to burst from happiness. There was no place you’d rather be in that moment than making a drunken fool of yourself with the most important person in your life by your side.

And if Lando was thinking the same thing, about how he was happier in that moment than he’d ever been, podiums and race win included, he’d keep that to himself for just a minute more.

[vivwritesfics]

Keep on Rolling - MV1

Chapter Five

Summary: Lando's best friend having feelings for anyone on the grid? Impossible, right? She worked with them, sharing her friendship with the grid with the world via the FormulaY/N youtube channel.

After film a video including... spicy water (alcohol), everything changes between her and a certain world champion. Good thing she hasn't had a crush on him since his F1 debut, right?

Right?

1.3K words

Promised QandA in next part

Series Masterlist

"Hey man," Lando said to Max one evening at dinner. It was drivers only, simply because Y/N was too busy working. Everybody wanted her there, but she couldn't spare the time.

Max looked at Lando with a polite smile, too busy eating to say anything.

"You let Y/N interview you?"

He nodded his head, still eating.

"Oh. Well, the rest of us ran away. We didn't trust it not to be a prank," Lando continued. "Why didn't you?"

Max stopped eating to look at him. "Do you have a problem with that?"

"What? No. I just want to know what you're doing with my best friend," answered Lando. This was starting to piss him off. "I don't care what you do, as long as you don't do anything to hurt her."

Max simply scoffed. He didn't have any intentions with Y/N. Whatever happened, happened. If that took them down the romantic route, so be it.

"Don't worry," he said, returning his attention to his food. "I don't plan on hurting her." He ate ignoring Lando and every other driver sat around the table. There was a good few minutes where Lando stared at him, something like disgust written on his face. He didn't mean to be pulling such a face, but he couldn't help it when it came to Y/N

***

Y/N's eyes hurt as she stared at the emails on her screen. "What the fuck," she whispered, pinching the bridge of her nose. It was seeming more and more impossible to find a moment of peace for her.

You need to look at this and give a statement, ASAP, the email said. This is the second time this has happened in the space of a month. How does this keep happening? You need to watch yourself to make sure it doesn't happen again

She read the email a couple of times over before clicking the link.

It was an Instagram post that had gone viral within the F1 community. Pictures of her with the drivers, hidden away in hotel rooms. Moments that nobody but Y/N and the drivers involved should have pictures of.

Her having dinner in Lando's apartment, Y/N and Charles walking through the hallway of a hotel together. There was one occasion where she, Lando and Carlos had snuck up to the roof of the hotel. Somehow that picture was in the post.

The worst one, though? There was a picture of Y/N and Max laying together. It must have been after the drunken quiz video, after they had fallen asleep against each other. It was such an intimate moment, a moment meant for the two of them and nobody else.

They were pictures nobody should have had. Who had taken them? Where had they come from? How did this account have them?

But then Y/N scrolled down to the comments

Username: omg she's such a whore

Username: You'd think this years championship would be interesting since she's sleeping with the whole grid

Username: I've never liked her

Username: She ruined Lando

Username: yeah I liked Carlando better before it involved her

They just went on and on like that. Thousands of them. For every supportive comment, there seemed to be two negative ones. It was horrible. How was she supposed to put out a statement about it.

So, she pulled out her phone and did the only thing she knew to do.

Ten minute later, there was a knock at her door. Y/N wiped her tears and ran to pull it open. "Oh thank god," she said through a sob and wrapped her arms around him.

Lando walked her further into the room and pushed the door shut behind him. “Tell me what happened,” he said and sat her down on her bed. He sat beside her and Y/N instantly placed her head on his shoulder.

"People are horrible," she sniffed as she pulled up the Instagram account.

Taking her phone from her hand, Lando scrolled through the pictures before getting to the comments. As he read them, his grip on Y/N was tight, growing tighter with every horrible comment.

"I've never seen these before," said Lando as he scrolled back up to the pictures. From the way they were taken, they couldn't have been fan pictures - they must have come from someone right there with them.

Lando pressed his finger against the power button and dropped Y/N's phone into his lap. He pulled her close, running his fingers through her hair. "Don't worry, we'll get to the bottom of this."

There was nothing they could do that night. So Y/N locked the door, double checked the lock and then pushed her bedside table up against it.

Y/N and Lando fell asleep together, spread out across the bed. They'd fallen asleep together several times before. They'd been doing it since they were kids, sharing a bed on sleepovers. It was a habit that hadn't died and had only taken breaks when either of them were dating.

"Promise everything is going to be okay?" Y/N muttered in her sleep as she rolled towards the door.

Lando's answer was a snore.

***

Max was used to his phone blowing up over night. He was a world famous Formula One driver, it was bound to happen. But, when he scrolled through his notifications this time, everything was different.

Pictures, none of which he had seen before. He was in some, but the one thing every picture had in common was Y/N. Max ignored all the pictures that didn't have him in the, all the pictures but the last one. The one of him in bed with her/

Nobody had been in the room with them, Max had made sure of it.

His phone vibrated in his hand. But it wasn't who Max hoped it would be. It wasn't the girl he had been pictured with. It was his father. Jos Verstappen. Just the man Max didn't want to be speaking to.

He swiped his finger across the screen and pressed his phone to his ear.

Have you ever been berated by an angry Dutchman almost to the point of tears. Max had. He'd been berated by his father so many times before. Even now, as a twenty five year old, it still stung just as much as it had when he was a child.

Jos ran through the list of all of the news article headlines he had read that morning. All of them about his son and the youtuber that had been following the grid around like a lost dog.

As much as Max wanted to defend her, Jos didn't give him the chance. He sat there in silence as his dad shouted at him down the phone. When Jos finally hung up, Max let out a sigh.

Suddenly there was a knock at his hotel room door. Now in a foul mood, Max stood and opened up the door.

"Hey," he said, letting his visitor in.

The visitor said nothing and walked into his room. "You need to stay away from Y/N."

Max stared at Lando. He said nothing, just stared, so Lando continued. "Stay away from her. Stop falling asleep with her, stop going near her. She doesn't need you to fuck up her life."

Max sat himself back on his bed and patted his thighs in a repetitive pattern. He'd just gotten enough of this from his father, he didn't need this from Lando, too. "What gives you the right?" he asked. "Why can't she make her own decisions?"

"She doesn't know what she wants," Lando spat.

Max shook his head. "I think you're wrong," he said. "I think she knows what she wants and you're unwilling to listen to her."

Suddenly Lando was very close to him, getting in his face. "Stay the fuck away from her," he growled and marched out of the room.

Taglist (Open): @sticksdoesart @eviethetheatrefreak @eugene-emt-roe @glai1023-blog @mqcherie @itsjustkhaos @chonkybonky @arian-directioner @lazybot @lpab @princessria127 @fangirl125reader @honethatty12 @larastark3107 @urfavouritef1girly @cassiopeiia24 @callsign-scully @lexiecamposv @dl-yum @savagecelery @laneyspaulding19 @formulas-bitch @teenwolf01

[toppersjeep]

Time Moves- Daniel Ricciardo X Reader

Masterlist

Part 1 Part 2

Summary: You had a crush on Daniel for years. But you knew your father Christian would never let you be with him. Especially after he left Red Bull. But now he’s back and all those old feelings come back. Daniel is also jealous of your new relationship with a certain driver.

(Warnings: Age gap, swearing)

Your POV

“Y/N did you hear Danny might be coming back” Max said. “Good for him I guess” I said reading over some paper work. “I know you care about him” Max said. “No not like that anymore” I said. “He’s your best friend though” Max said.

“Was Max” I said. “Well when you aren’t grumpy he’s downstairs” Max said walking away. I then followed Max downstairs. To my surprise Daniel was talking to my father about something.

“Ah there she is” Dad said. “What’s up” I said. “Ricciardo is back he’s gonna be our third driver” Dad said. “That’s awesome” I said. “I thought you’d be happier than that” Max said. “Yeah just tired you know” I said. “It’s good to see you it’s been too long” Daniel said hugging me.

“Yeah it has” I said. There it was those feelings again. The butterflies as soon as he hugged me. “I missed you” he whispered in my ear. I stepped out of the hug. “So is he staying permanently” I said. “Yeah I think so at least” Daniel said smiling.

There’s that beautiful smile. God I love that smile.

“He is” Dad said. “Well that’s good news” I said. “Yeah it is” Max said. After catching up I went outside and sat at one of the tables and typed up some reports for Red Bull. Daniel then walked out and sat across from me.

“How long do you plan on being weird around me” Daniel said. “I’m not the one who ended things” I said. “You know why I did” Daniel said. “I don’t wanna hear the silly excuses of an age gap” I said. “It’s not just that.. you know your father” Daniel said.

“Whatever I don’t care do you need something” I said. “I just wanted to talk to you” Daniel said. “I don’t want to talk to you” I said. “I’m sorry I ended things” Daniel said. “I’m only 25 Daniel it’s not that big of a difference” I said.

“But it was to me and how people would’ve looked at it” he said. “You think I give a shit about what people think” I said. “You may not but I do” Daniel said. “Whatever Daniel” I said. Someone then came up behind me and kissed my cheek.

“Hi chéri what are you working on” Charles said. “Boring reports hi” I said kissing him. “You should come hang out with me” Charles said. “How was the meeting” I said he sat beside me. “I think it went well” he said putting a hand on my leg.

“Good” I said. “Hey Daniel heard your back at Red Bull” Charles said. “Yeah I am” Daniel said. “He’s gonna be the reserve driver” I said. “That’s nice welcome back” Charles said smiling. “So how longs this been going on” Daniel said.

“What” I said. “Oh me and Y/N” Charles said. “Yeah so how long have you two been sleeping together” Daniel said. “That’s not right” I said. “Daniel what’s the problem I know you two had a past but” Charles said. “What I do doesn’t concern you” I said.

“So Christian approves of Charles huh” Daniel said. “Daniel things change” I said. “He said before he didn’t want you dating on the grid” Daniel said. “He changed his mind after Charles” I said. “I asked him permission to ask her out” Charles said.

“… of course” Daniel said. “You broke up with me so” I said. “Because I you know what you two enjoy each other” Daniel said leaving. “Well that was lovely” Charles said.

“That’s how he is” I said. “His loss” Charles said kissing my forehead. “Yeah” I said. “What’s wrong” Charles said. “I don’t know.. I just feel awful” I said. “Because he’s upset he broke up with you” Charles said. “Yeah” I said.

“Why don’t you come see me for a bit” Charles said shutting my computer. “Char baby I have work to do” I said. “It’s quiet in my drivers room” he said taking my laptop. “That’s not funny” I said. “Well then if you want your computer come with me” Charles said I followed him.

It was time for the race and I sat by the computers. Daniel was near the wall. But he then came over to sit beside me.

“Nice” he said. “What’s the problem now” I whispered. “You run back over here after hooking up with Charles” Daniel said. “What I do with my boyfriend isn’t your concern” I said. “It is when you run back over here with messy hair.. and marks on your lower neck” Daniel said.

“You aren’t my boyfriend anymore” I said. “Still.. at least I was more sneaky about that” Daniel said. “Please.. don’t start that jealousy shit” I said. “Me jealous I’m not” he said. “Sure you know what I’m just gonna go” I said getting up.

“Where are you going” Dad asked. “Ummm Charles wanted me to watch his race so I’m gonna do that” I said. “Alright.. have fun” Dad said. I started walking over to the Ferrari paddock.

But Daniel followed me.

“This is stalking you know” I said. “So you’re just gonna run away from me huh” Daniel said. I stopped in my tracks. “Me.. run away don’t give me that lecture you ran away” I said. “Because… I got to close” Daniel said.

“Too close” I asked. “Yes… I wasn’t supposed to do that” Daniel said. “But you did you acted like you loved me then threw me away” I said. “And now you can’t stand that I’m in love with Charles can you” I said. He looked at me.

“You’re right I can’t” Daniel said. “I moved on and you are still stuck in the past” I said. “The past that was two years ago” Daniel said. “And you messed it all up by letting me go did you ever even love me” I said. “How can you ask me that” Daniel said.

“Answer the question Daniel” I said. “Yes I loved you god I still love you” Daniel said. “If you loved me then you wouldn’t have hurt me” I said. “And what Charles is gonna give you everything you want” Daniel said.

“Yeah… he is because unlike you he put me before his career” I said. Daniel didn’t look at me. “You can’t say that I did that” he said. “You did.. Daniel .. put everything over me” I said. “I did love you” he said trying to grab my hand.

I didn’t let him.

“Now you know how I feel to be in love with someone who acted like you didn’t exist” I said. “I never meant to hurt you that much” he said. “But you did.. just let me go Daniel” I said. “But I can’t do that” Daniel said.

“Then I’ll make the decision for you” I said walking away. “Y/N please” Daniel said. “Daniel I’m getting married.. let this go” I said. “Married … what do you mean” Daniel said.

“Did you bother to look at my finger or even my instagram oh wait you blocked me remember” I said. “Your… marrying him… you were supposed to” Daniel began to say. “Supposed to what marry you.. guess you can’t have everything you want” I said walking into the Ferrari paddock.

I walked into the garage and Charles ran over and hugged me.

“My girl.. I’m so happy you’re here” Charles said. “Gotta support my favorite driver” I said. “And fiancé” Charles said I smiled. “Of course” I said. “God I can’t wait to marry you” Charles said.

____

Daniel’s POV

I went back to Red Bull and sat down by Max. Sure marrying Charles??? Out of all people

“What’s going on with you mate” Max said. “Y/N is engaged to Charles” I said. It still sounded so weird. “Oh … ha yeah they got engaged a couple months ago” Max said.

“I had no idea” I said. “I mean.. it makes since you know for well” Max said. “For what” I said. “There kid… don’t you know that” Checo said. “You’re telling me they have a child” Daniel said. “Yeah.. Jules you haven’t met him” Max said.

“How old is Jules” I asked. “Like two and a half years old” Checo said. “Yeah look here’s a picture of him with P they are best friends” Max said showing me a picture. “When did this happen” I said. “Two years ago they started dating after.. she broke up with her ex boyfriend then yk Jules came along” Max said.

“He’s Charles son” I asked. “Yeah.. why.. do you ask” Max said.

Because he might be mine….

___

Part 2 coming soon !

[taintandviolent]

The Dork Theory ; Max Cooperman x reader

summary: Against better judgement, you decide to go to a college party. You run into a familiar face there, and you decide to test a long running theory to do with dorks and big 🍆 . Shameless smut ensues.

warnings: smut without plot, pnv, car sex, unprotected sex, handjobs, oral sex, degradation/shaming, recording.

a/n: max deserves it. he really does. not beta-read. this was just a whim kinda fic, so I hope it's not total garbage. enjoy! thanks for reading if you did.

full fic & taglist under cut! ↓ / ao3 link here! / ♪ recommended playlist here! ♪

It was a party, so you were forcing yourself to do party things. Or so you kept telling yourself. Really, it was a live streaming event for some stupid college fight, which was an event that you wouldn’t be caught dead at – under any circumstances. It wasn’t your scene, you couldn’t care less about fighting – outside of the carnal, hormonal fact that you got to see rippling muscles and displays of strength. At times, even you were simple. Whatever fight had already happened and judging by the sudden uptick in shouts and cheers, you assumed the preferred candidate won. The party was now in full swing with people mingling and drinking excessively. Ah, college. 

Admittedly, you weren’t one for college parties either. It was a place to drink, screw, and in most cases, as a byproduct of the previous two mixing, fight. Of those three things, you only really enjoyed one of them and hadn’t done it in a while – long enough for you to crave it. Maybe that’s why you came to the party to begin with; to get some tail. Albeit hypocritically, you were also drinking. You weren’t drunk, but definitely heading there; your head felt fuzzy as you stared into your half-empty red Solo cup. Whoever had mixed the drinks had erred on the side of too strong.

“Well… hey there.”

You looked up from said cup, one brow quirked. In front of you, stood a guy who looked oddly familiar, but you couldn’t place him. Eyes narrowed, you scanned him from his shoes to his lush, curly brown locks. He wore jeans and a Something Corporate t-shirt. Really? You realized you’d seen him earlier, schmoozing with girls, explaining something very passionately. They hung on his arms, but seemed distant – but no, that still wasn’t where you recognized him from. 

He was scanning you up and down, lingering on all the right parts of your body; your hips, your breasts, your face. Finally, he spoke. "My name's Max, what's yer--"

"Wait, hold on." You pressed a single finger against his lips, which pressed back into your finger, almost like he was kissing it. 

"Max?" 

He nodded, still compressed against your fingertip. He didn't need to confirm it, really, because just like that, it all came rushing back; it had been years but you knew exactly who he was and you were about to make sure he remembered, too. You withdrew your hand with a breathy chuckle. 

"Like... Max.... Cooperman? The chubby kid who was always recording fights in the schoolyard?"

Ouch. Max cringed, knotting his mouth up to one side. Starting off strong with this one. “Yep, that – was me. And for the record, I was a part of those fights from time to time. And I trained -”  

"Ohhhh my god," you breathed, cutting him off as you covered your mouth with your hand. "You were such a dork, you know that, don't you? Like, such a dork.” 

“Okay, alright.” he said, looking behind him for a brief moment. “I came over ‘cause I have a policy that no cute girls are allowed to stand alone, especially at one of my parties. Are you just gonna’ stand here and bust my balls all night?” 

So he thought you were cute. Your cunt clenched — you’d take that thought to the bank. You grinned inwardly, rocking back and forth on your heels. “I can, if you want me to.” 

He cocked his head like a dog, unsure how to take that. “What, are we gonna’ play fight?” 

“Something like that.” 

You reached forward, teasingly slapping his cheek. With an intrigued expression, Max caught your hand and yanked you towards him, looking at your lips. You mirrored his gaze, wondering what they tasted like, and if they were as soft as they looked.

You couldn’t deny the facts; he wasn’t the dorky kid that you passively paid attention to. He stood taller and had trimmed down, a result of likely more physical activity and maybe better eating habits. The attraction that bubbled up in your core wasn’t new, it had just been dormant for many years. You ran your tongue along your bottom lip, wetting it and Max’s dark brown eyes followed your tongue as it travelled, a smirk stretching across his lips. 

"You still have that Mustang?" 

"Pffft, of course I do." 

“You wanna’ um…” 

Wide-eyed and eager, Max nodded. “Uh, YEAH?” 

The two of you made your way outside, with Max quickly navigating you to where his car was parked. The cool night air bit at your skin, goose flesh erupting over anything that was exposed – mostly your legs. Now in front of the car, your eyes swept over the Mustang, admiring it. You weren’t a car girl, by any means, but you knew when to appreciate them. This was decidedly one of those times. He took care of his car, that much was apparent. 

With a deep breath, you turned back to Max, an expectant smirk on your lips. “So, is this the part where you tell me you’ve had a crush on me since high school?” 

Max laughed as he leaned against the door of the car, shaking his head. You were cute, but this wasn’t a teenage romcom. “Actually, no, I don’t know you. I mean… I wanna’ know you.” 

He reached for you, snaking his hands around your hips to pull you closer. 

“Ohhoh shit, someone gained some confidence when they lost that baby fat, huh?” 

“Damn, okay.” He looked away, almost annoyed, but the lust that was now coursing through his system trumped any fleeting anger. “You seem to know a lot about me.” 

You paused, taken aback as you stared at him. You did. Because while he didn’t remember you, you remembered him. You’d always had an affinity for dorks and paid attention to them, despite cringing at their cornball behaviour – because if you knew one thing, it was that the weird, shy guys were always hung – and there was one particular day where you’d made your opinions about Max Cooperman. 

It was May, somewhere in the middle of the month. You were in a hurry to get to 4th period when you heard a bunch of guys shouting and jeering at each other. The natural instinct to watch a fight took over and you slowed your steps. 

You’d only paused for a second, not wanting to be late to class. He was fighting behind the bleachers, bright, red blood running down his top lip, fists up in front of his face, shouting at some guy: “I got this, bro! I got this!” 

You blinked. Back to reality. 

“Maybe I knew you. Maybe I thought you were cute,” you confessed, letting the alcohol take over your nerves. “Maybe I have a theory that dorky dudes have big cocks.” 

“Butterball Cooperman? Cute? What am I now then, huh?” 

You chewed your lip, not saying anything. Max caught your glance, looking at you with a hunger in his eyes that promised it would lead somewhere — it was the kind of look that said, Hey. My dick just woke up and it’s because of you. You crushed your lips against his, tangling both of your hands in his warm curls. A whisper of fucking hot echoed in your mind. Max didn’t need to hear it, he felt the heat coming off your body, rolling towards him in waves. With his groin throbbing, he connected your bodies again, pulling you tight at the waist. His free hand stretched behind him, fumbling for the door handle. 

“Wanna’ find out?” He asked, breaking the kiss. 

You nodded. 

Max threw the door open, and pulled the driver’s seat up, allowing you some space to crawl in first. You leaned in — making sure your ass was on full display in the short, denim skirt you’d chosen earlier that night — and moved  quickly to the passenger side. With your knees pressing into the black, leather interior of his backseat, you sat upright, making room for him as he joined you. 

He faced you, leaning his back against the window and angled his hips towards you, knees to his chest. You stretched forward, tapped one side of his closed knees. “Lemme in, Cooperman.” 

Immediately, they fell open, exposing the bulge in his jeans. There was a dirty, devilish little smirk on his face; he knew you were looking, sizing him up. Not such a dork now, huh?

“Theory proven?” 

“Maybe. I’ve gotta’ see.” 

You palmed his half-hard cock outside of his jeans, the tips of your fingers tracing the faint outline, until they came to the tip. Applying pressure, the pad of your pointer finger swept back and forth into the squishy flesh until your finger was met with a wet spot. You’d given a fair number of handjobs in your life, enough to be confident in your skills. 

“Shit,” Max hissed above you. “Shit.” 

Underneath the fabric, you felt his dick shift in his jeans. With a pleased smirk, giving him what he so clearly wanted, you unbuttoned and unzipped, allowing his hard-on some room to breathe. The bulge pitched forward slightly as you reached for the ruched edge of his boxers, and pulled them down over his balls. His cock now free, it flopped heavily against his stomach, searing hot on his abdomen. It was about as long as you’d expected, but much thicker. With a wanton gaze, you took hold of the shaft and began stroking, feeling the veins swell with each pass. Every so often, you paid special attention to the underside, gliding your fingers over the thickest veins. Eventually, his cock stood at attention, the tip reddened and leaking profusely. You bit your lip. 

“Ooooooh, Max Cooperman has a big thick cock.” You tittered in a teasing lilt, still fondling it. He whimpered loud, a high pitched desperate sound that filled the car. You hadn’t expected him to be so whiny, but somehow you weren’t surprised — it seemed appropriate for that nerd in the schoolyard. Whiny then, whiny now. Every obscene word was punctuated with a whine, like a teenager getting his first handjob. He rutted his hips helplessly against your fingers, grinding his stiffness into your grip. “Yeah, yeah, yeah, just like that - fuck.” 

Almost to shut him up, you craned forward to kiss him again, your mouths crushing together in violent desperation. After a few seconds, Max sloppily broke the kiss to look down at your hand, saliva stringing from his bottom lip to yours.

“Oh my fuckin’ god,” he breathed, watching your fingers as they stroked his swollen cock, paying special attention to the scarlet, almost purple head. His cock twitched again in your grip, expelling more precum. “Oh my fuckin’ god, holy shit, holy shit…” 

You were delighted by the position of power you were in, and even more than that, delighted by the way that Max was literally coming undone in front of you. All his acquired cockiness had melted away, replaced by the desperate dork you remembered. 

“I knew he was in there,” you whispered under your breath before giving his cock a firm grip, milking another whine from his lips. Max was too far gone to even respond logically to anything, you weren’t sure he’d even heard you over his ragged, uneven pants.  

Feeling adventurous (and perhaps cruel), you extended your tongue, flattening it against the underside of his cock. The salty pre-cum oozed onto it. Max gasped, lifting his hips upright, which forced his dick further into your mouth. You pulled back, shaking your head softly. For a moment, he did nothing but stare at his own cock, watching it as your hand drug up and down over it, working it inches from your lips. You thought he was going to lose it, but with a heavy breath, he lowered his hips again and went back to breathing unevenly.

“Please,” he begged incessantly, his voice a few octaves higher than usual. “Please lemme’ fuck you…”

“Uh-uh.” 

Max whimpered again, bumping his head against the window repeatedly like a kid throwing a tantrum.

“You can’t, Max. There isn’t enough room here.” 

“Yeaaah, baby, yeah there is. We’ll make it work.” 

You paused for a moment, surveying your surroundings. Even with the seats pushed forward, the backseat left little room for moving around, and the oddly placed hump in the center was undeniably impeding any laying down. Max’s hips were already jutted up oddly, you couldn’t picture laying down atop of it… unless….

“You wanna’ fuck me, Max? How bad you wanna’ fuck me?” You asked, already knowing the answer. 

Slack-jawed, he nodded, his curls bouncing. The collar of his shirt was a shade darker with sweat. “So bad. So fuckin’ bad, you have no idea. You can’t even fathom.” 

You thought about it. And thought about it some more, until finally, you said: “Move over.”

Obediently, Max scooted his hips up, his dick bobbing before he shifted himself onto the floor, allowing you to crawl forward, using the curve of the backseat like a sex pillow, your ass tilted up towards the now very fogged up back window. Your cunt was already warm and aching from giving him head, and with a deep breath, you imagined the wet slit that would greet him as soon as he got up behind you. 

Curious, you reached up between your legs, pressing them into the satin fabric – just as you thought. Soaked. Finding the hem of your underwear, you yanked them to the side, exposing her. Your middle finger then slipped inside, dragging some of the slick down to your clit, which you tapped, bringing the sensitivity higher. 

“Oh shit,” he gasped, seeing this erotic display that sent spikes of arousal straight to his already engorged and aching cock. Still on the floor, but now behind the passenger’s seat, Max leaned forward. Still awkwardly positioned – you silently applauded the desperation in which he did it – Max went for your cunt, bending his head at angle so that his tongue could flick out against your wet folds, getting a taste of your sweet, leaking juices. You couldn’t help but moan into the leather, clenching and shaking as he lingered there for a moment, just lapping at it, swallowing and mouth breathing heavily onto her. 

“Fuck–” He straightened up, and used the back of his hand to wipe off his chin. “You taste so good, baby.” 

You wiggled your ass in response, smiling against the seat. After a little bit of strained and clumsy maneuvering, Max was finally behind you, dick in hand. He shuffled closer, his jean-clad thighs pressing into the backs of your bare ones. Using his free hand, he glided over the curve of your ass and down your spine, as far as the jean skirt would let him. You felt the warm head bumping into her over and over again with a haphazard rhythm, strings of precum dripping down onto the seat below you  – he was jerking off into your cunt. 

“I thought you were going to fuck me.” 

“I am,” he panted. “I am… this is just too good. Fuck! I wish I had my camera.” 

After using the tip to play with your wetness for a bit longer, Max finally lined up and sunk his cock inside of you, using your hips to pull himself deeper. He bottomed out – the stretching heat burned, filling you from wall to wall as his hips began bucking instinctively, finding a carnal rhythm – you let out a low moan. You begged, wanting him to press himself as deep into you as he could.  

“Record it,” you suddenly ordered. 

“Wha-?” he choked, out of breath and still pumping himself into you. 

“Record it. You have your phone, don’t you?” You arched your back, pushing up into him. 

“You serious?” 

“Yeah, I’m serious. It’d be hot.” 

Still in awe of your lustful demand, Max reached in his back pocket and pulled his phone out. He quickly navigated to the camera app, tapped the red button, and held the phone above you, getting a wider angle. The flash was on; he pulled his thick, glistening cock out of you slowly, while his dark eyes darted back and forth between watching you and watching it on the screen. Knowing he was going to have this to later jerk it to… shit – his breath hitched in his throat. He bumped his hips into you a few times, popping the head into your cunt.

“Yeah, you like that?” 

At first, Max breathily answered, but remembering he was recording, cleared his throat and answered in a lower tone. “Fuck yeah.” 

“Oh stop,” you laughed, wiggling your hips on his cock. “Afraid to let your dorky voice out again?” 

“Shut up, I’m not a dork.” 

“Yeaaaah, yeah you are. A big dork with a big cock.” 

Much to his own dismay, Max whined, picking up speed as he hammered into you, his little desperate bunny humps rutting against your pussy, sending shockwaves through your core.  The sounds of skin slapping against skin, paired with your broken moans and Max’s pathetic, horny whines filled the car. He’d never really been one for degradation, but the way you teased him, throwing your verbal right hooks every chance you got, had him in pieces. Every time you did it, his dick twinged painfully, stiffening past the point of comfort. He took hold of it, jerking it a few times into your pussy. Making sure the camera was capturing it, Max went back to thrusting, sinking his aching cock halfway in before bottoming out again. The video would never see the light of day, you knew it. He’d have to mute it to save his ego, and what was the point of muting porn? Max was way too whiny to show his macho friends, every other thrust was accompanied by a desperate little whimper. 

“Shit, I’m gonna’ - I’m gonna’ baby, oh my god, I’m sorry I’m gonna’ – auuggh!”

With a final whimper, Max yanked his cock from your pussy, allowing his orgasm to burst out over your exposed cunt; hot, milky strings decorating your folds and ass cheeks.

Immediately after pumping the rest of his cum onto your ass, like a gentleman, Max sunk two fingers in your pussy, curling them up to masterfully find the sensitive, spongy flesh inside. So, he’d had practice, too. You took fistfuls of the seat, digging your nails into the soft, polished leather. Thankfully for him, you were close, so the way he pumped his fingers in and out of you brought you over the edge within a matter of seconds. 

With a final: “Ffffuck!!”, you clenched around his fingers, pleasure rupturing your entire core. You squeezed your eyes shut, riding out the orgasm and backing up into his fingers to increase the pressure. You heard Max hiss in a breath through his teeth as he watched you, enjoyed you, and recorded you in your most intimate moments. The thought drove your orgasm forward even further. 

As the pulses subsided, you flopped down heavily, out of breath and drenched in sweat. You pivoted your body, rolling back over onto your back. Max was still recording, absentmindedly playing with your still weeping cunt. You watched him with a smile, entertained and enamoured that he was so invested with you. With a little dinging sound, the recording finally ended, and he tucked the phone back into his pocket. 

You two sat in silence, breathing heavily until, in a moment of post-nut clarity, Max said: “Shit, I was supposed to spar with Matt.” 

“Who?” You couldn’t care less. 

“Uh, my friend.”

“Mm, well… Matt is just gonna’ have to take a rain check. That’s too bad.” 

He laughed, leaning his head against the window again. After a few moments, he spoke again, his voice soft and low.  

“So, your theory is true, huh?” 

“Oh, yeah. It’s true. Took me years to prove it, but… it’s definitely true.” You leaned up and ran your pointer finger along the inseam of his jeans, smirking to yourself. “Definitely true.”

t a g l i s t : @kaismanwich / @garykingz / @elsamars / @silverzoomies / @tatesdisasterofalover / @thewolveswithin / @80strashbag / @twinkiemaximoff / @spill-the-t / @stucktothetwo / @enchanting-evan / @yesdevineruler / @anonymous0316 / @eventually27 / @my-own-walker / @kai-slut / @demxnicprxncess / @fuckedbykai / @iluwmycats / @dewberryobssesed / @the-goblin1 / @dirtyfairy97 / @jellyluvr / @strangerthings420 / @kai-anderson-whore / @babygorewhore / @quickandsilvers / @tatelangdonsweater / @ifeeltoofuckingmuch / @howtobesasha / @randominstake / @throwinginmythai / @slvt4jamesmarch / @poltoreveur / @feefymo / @evpeters87 / @lacucarachapisser /

Ask to be added to taglist for future fics!!

[leclerc-s]

reluctant parents

series masterlist

penelopetrevino posted new stories

he said, 'amor, i have a surprise for you.' i'm patiently waiting to see what it is. update: the surprise is just lando... again 🙄

penelope trevino quick, when someone says, 'i have surprise for you' what does one normally think?

rowan todd well, last time pierre told me that we got a dog, so a dog.

natalia ruiz a dog, charlie did the same thing.

zoya torres well he said 'we have a problem' and it was his parents, whom i was meeting for the first time ever.

mick schumacher considering i told freya 'i did a thing' and i had gotten angie, i'd think a dog.

daniel jones-ricciardo i got a cat the last time she said that.

daphne jones-ricciardo i got a heart attack because it was followed by the words 'i got in an accident'

penelope trevino I TOLD YOU TWO!!

lando norris but aren't i a nice surprise? penelope trevino you have a girlfriend, spend time with her for the love of god. bailey winters he just tells me to spend time with max and p so he can spend time with his boyfriend.

carlos sainz but amor, you love lando!

mae jones-verstappen praying carlos sainz lives to see another day.

isabella perez he may have survived appendicitis but he will not survive pissing off penny.

pato o'ward he's about to learn that you never piss off a mexican woman. dulce perez rip carlos sainz, you would've hated to see max win another gp

gael perez rip carlos sainz, oscar can finally let out a sigh of relief

oscar piastri why am i always getting involved in shit?

lewis hamilton does carlos hate oscar because lando loves oscar and carlos wishes that was him?

fernando alonso he wants that mclaren seat back sebastian vettel you two are the biggest instigators in this group chat. fernando alonso it's a talent

rhys jones it's like watching a tennis match but only one cares and the other doesn't

penelope trevino BACK TO MY PROBLEM PEOPLE!

lance stroll carlos has attachment issues and lando imprinted on him like a baby duck.

pierre gasly alternative: carlos and lando have been cheating on their girlfriends with each other.

bailey winters i hate that i can actually believe that. penelope trevino why is that actually believable?

carlos sainz we are not that bad.

zoya torres if trevor noah can make a joke about lando looking like more of a couple with his former teammate (carlos) than his own girlfriend (bailey) it's bad.

lando norris we may have a problem.

penelope trevino you think?

penelopetrevino and landonorris have posted new stories

he's crashing another date. i could probably hurt him. i may be smiling but i need a bottle of patron to get me through the day. she's going to kill me. mclaren you know who to blame when i mysteriously die

penelope trevino quick, say something so i won't kill lando.

rowan todd you'll go to jail?

penelope trevino not good enough

isabella perez jesus will never let you forget this.

penelope trevino we're getting there.

zoya torres you'll never be able to see little jewel again?

penelope trevino thank you for that reminder zoya.

bailey winters i can call his mom for you? that's what i tend to do when he pisses me off or i call ria and she reminds him that i wrote a heartbreaking album about him.

bailey winters and if none of that works i call max, who laughs in his face for hours on end.

daphne jones-ricciardo or you could talk to them, like normal people

penelope trevino you think i haven't tried that yet? it's impossible to get through to them daph!

dulce perez they're like his work parents, he needs them around 24/7

isabella perez personally, i wouldn't let this slide.

mae jones-verstappen throw him into the slammer!!

natalia ruiz all of you guys have third wheels that suck. i love my third wheel.

penelope trevino not all of us can have a joris natalia!

natalia ruiz at least it's lando and not like pierre, who would be an annoying third wheel.

rowan todd okay, that's my boyfriend nat.

natalia ruiz you cannot be publicly defending a man who makes 🐶 jokes or calls himself tripod

bailey winters EMBARRASSING!!

rowan todd your boyfriend would rather spend time third wheeling his best friend than spend time with you.

bailey winters

rowan todd never make fun of me again bailey.

mae jones-verstappen she was obviously starving

isabella perez somewhere on the coast.

rowan todd you two are comedians.

daphne jones-ricciardo i see now why this group chats is named what it is.

daphne jones-ricciardo you're all fucked in the head.

natalia ruiz daphne's never one to reply but she always roasts the shit out of us.

penelope trevino i'm just resigned to the fact that lando is never going anywhere.

penelope trevino he is my sea urchin.

daphne jones-ricciardo this is why lando always crashes your dates.

dulce perez it's an irrational fear daph!!

daphne jones-ricciardo NO THE FUCK IT ISN'T!!

zoya torres so many problems so little time to digest it all.

liked by carlossainz55, landonorris, lando.jpg and others

penelopetrevino photo dump but half of it is me with a beer (my only company because carlos always ditches me for lando) and the other half is carlos with his true love (lando)

tagged: carlossainz55, landonorris

view all comments

landonorris i am his true love, glad to see you finally admitting it

↳ penelopetrevino go spend time with your own girlfriend. rowan's roasting her in the groupchat.

↳ pierregasly WHAT GROUP CHAT?

↳ isabellaperez ABORT MISSION!! THEY CAN'T KNOW!!

↳ alex_albon FAKE PEOPLE EVERYWHERE!!

user26 i would rather die than let this happen to me.

↳ user60 what makes you think penelope has a choice in the matter?

↳ user26 that's very true

user89 those texts from lando are foul!!

baileywinters i say we dump them and date each other instead.

↳ penelopetrevino now that's a good idea.

↳ landonorris hold up what?

↳ carlossainz55 no.

user02 and when these two get married is lando going to interrupt the wedding for shits and giggles?

↳ landonorris that's actually not a bad idea.

↳ penelopetrevino you pull that shit on my wedding day and i'll hurt you.

patriciooward personally i would run him over with my car but that's just me.

↳ landonorris STOP GIVING HER IDEAS!

baileywinters contrary to popular belief, we do actually spend time together.

↳ user57 i would've thrown hands if norizz was neglecting his relationship to crash carlos' dates

↳ landonorris why am i always getting threatened with violence?

↳ isabellaperez because you pull shit like this.

taglist: @burningcupcakefire @arkhammaid @applopie @sunflower-golden-vol6 @lorarri @bb-swift @thewannabewriter @mypage-myfandoms @stopeatread @hobiismyhopeu @lilsiz @alessioayla @niniluvsainz @au-ghosttype @six-call @justtprachisblog @nichmeddar @landonorizzz @unluckyyoshi @cool-ultra-nerd @kami10471633 @1nt3rnetgf @fernandoswarcrimes @arieltwvdtohamflash @brekkers-whore @natcha888 @camdensreg @mycenterfold @dear-fifi @georgeparisole @dan3avocado @nikfigueiredo @namgification @jensonsonlybutton @weekendlusting @trouble-sistar @lesliiieeeee @leclercsluv @33-81 @theseus-jpg @sarah-thatstings-ann @minmira95 @casperlikej @formulaonebuff @hopenshaw @ijustgomessitupx @hwalllllllelujah @doodlehunz @prongsvault

¡leclerc-s speaks! and it's another late night update!!! woooo!!!

¡disclaimer! this is in no way making assumptions about the people involved in this story, this is all fake. it is a fanfiction please don't take any of what is said seriously. this is all for entertainment purposes and as a creative outlet for me. enjoy!

[loverslakes]

if only to say you’re mine 💌 a byler valentine’s ficlet 💌 also on ao3 (renamed, repost from valentine’s day 2023)

"I think it's kinda cool how everyone's more eager to celebrate the little things now, after almost losing so much," Will ponders after Max voices criticism at the frivolous decorations around Hawkins High.

He notices a head of dark waves near Will's locker up ahead, turning to walk in the opposite direction, and pointedly chooses to ignore it. Will has never really been a skeptic—though he's never gotten to celebrate the day of Love, he likes seeing the people he cares about be giddy about it.

Like the year his mom had just started dating Bob when he was twelve, flowers were delivered to the front door during breakfast, and he saw her smile for the first time in a long time. And when Lucas asked Max to be his valentine when they were thirteen, and he got all the steps wrong—Max laughed at him, but Will noticed the flush on her cheekbones as she accepted his offer. Or when he watched Jonathan scramble to accomplish the perfect long-distance gesture for Nancy when Will was fourteen, which he thought was kind of dumb, but still.

Now, Will is sixteen, and the town he grew up in has finally found a new normal after years of war. It's February 14, 1988, and the hallway is covered with construction paper hearts and pink garlands.

"I mean, yeah, that's sweet. It's just like—who's going to come and clean this up by tomorrow? Does it not feel like a waste to you?" She poses, and Will shrugs.

"Are we talking about how Valentine's day is a waste of energy and money? Because I completely agree," Dustin interjects, joining them in their walk down the hall, and Will is thankful because he's not the best debate partner. He listens as they stop at Max's locker first and then Will's. By the time Will turns his lock combination, the two have moved on to a full-fledged conversation about economics.

"I do support innovation and creativity, but we can't ignore how consumerism is changing the moral fabric of society—" Dustin stops talking abruptly when Will's locker opens.

Will's gaze is trained on the floor as he feels the surface of his face catch fire. If he never looks up, he'll never have to find out if his friends’ heads are angled to the floor just like his. He wonders if he stares long enough, if he stays frozen, that Dustin and Max will just get the idea and continue their debate.

But his friends are Max and Dustin, who aren't normal about anything ever.

And Will knows they are all three looking at the same thing.

A homemade Valentine.

That just fell out of Will's locker.

A cute little handmade Valentine's card is on the ground in front of them, addressed to Will Byers.

"Will…" Dustin sings, drawing out his name, "What is this?"

Will finally snaps out of his frozen state, bending down at lightning speed to pick up the card before either of his nosy friends beat him to it.

"Weren't you just talking about how much you dislike Valentine's day? Why do you care?" Will tries, avoiding eye contact as he (carefully) shoves the card deep into his locker.

"Forget Valentine's day—are you seeing someone?" Max exclaims, "Or is this from a secret admirer?"

Will stutters, too flustered to even think about an answer. His utter mortification is only amplified when Lucas and El join the three of them.

"Did I just hear someone say, secret admirer?" El inquires.

"Why are the three of you being weird—Will, dude, are you okay? Your face is really red," Lucas speculates. Dustin ignores their questions, opting to glare at Will instead.

"Judging by the look on your face, you definitely know who this is from, and you don't want to tell us. What the hell, man!" Dustin concludes.

Max looks around, ducking her head and lowering her voice, and asks, "Wait, is it Jeff from biology? I knew I was right about him."

"No, Max, oh my god, bequietplease ," Will begs, face only growing more flushed, looking to El for help. Four of his best friends are looking at him, facial expressions a mix of sympathy, excitement, pride, and suspicion.

"Maybe it's something new, and Will wants to keep it to himself. We can respect that, right guys?" El urges the rest of the group, and Will is so thankful that his sister can pretty much read his mind. He takes a deep breath.

"Let's just act like no one saw that. Okay? Please?" Will pleads, teeth clenched together, and he's met with reluctant agreement.

"Just know we're happy for you, man. Whoever it is better know he's the luckiest guy ever," Lucas affirms before he receives a death glare from Max. "Other than me, of course," he winces. Will turns to get his book, and they'll probably be late for class, thanks to someone's poor decision-making skills.

"Who's the luckiest guy ever?" He hears a familiar voice say, the only voice missing from this delightful intervention. Will's heart flutters a little bit.

"Will has a valentine," El discloses, raising her eyebrows at Mike.

"Oh," Mike responds, sounding unphased, "Of course he does—it's Will," he acknowledges, and now that Will thinks about it, he feels kind of offended by how surprised the party was at the possibility of Will having an admirer. Mike seems to understand completely. But also, it's Mike.

Mike, who has been close to obsessed with Will ever since they repaired their friendship almost 2 summers ago. Mike, who is so nice to Will all the time that the party doesn't even bat an eye at his behavior anymore. It's so similar to how they acted when they were ten years old, Will thinks that Dustin and Lucas are just so glad to have another thing that feels normal again that they don't think twice about it.

"Anyway," Will groans, signaling that the conversation needs to be over now. "We have class." The rest of them disperse, and Will catches Mike's eye. He notices the rosiness that's formed on Mike's cheeks and the warmth in his expression as he holds Will's gaze for a beat longer. Then, Mike tilts his head, signaling for Will to walk with him to their next class.

…

Will laughs to himself later that day, considering how invested his friends appear to be in his love life while still managing to be entirely oblivious to something that's been right under their noses for almost a year now. He's holding the sweetly made Valentine's card in his hand, flipping it over to find a quick doodle of a ceiling fan in Mike's style, with the words:

I'm a huge fan of yours. Be my valentine, pretty boy?

Love, Mike

"What's so funny?" Mike asks from the driver's seat, looking over at Will as they make the trip to his house from school.

"You," Will teases, getting a hey, from Mike as he takes his hand off the gear shift and snakes his fingers between Will's. Will hums and then continues, "Just thinking about the party. Like, do you think they really have no idea about us?"

"I don't know," Mike wonders, bringing Will's hand up to his mouth to press a kiss on top. "I think everyone's just been caught up with their own shit that a lot has gone over their heads. Plus, we haven't really met the normal friendship standards since they've known us. Maybe they're scared to ask. Or they're just self-absorbed assholes."

"Mike," Will scolds with a giggle.

"I mean, it's fine with me. I like having you all to myself anyway," Mike sighs dramatically as he pulls the car into the driveway. "Except for when I wish everyone could know you're mine and be jealous, which is most of the time." He puts the car in park.

"You're silly," Will teases as he leans over the console to kiss Mike. Their lips move together easily—like they have each other memorized. Mike smiles against Will's mouth, both happy to have each other close after a long day of school—similar to most days, but especially on a day centered around love and romance.

"I love you," Mike says between pecks across Will's cheeks, nose, and forehead. The two trade more slow kisses and giggles until their position across the console becomes uncomfortable, and they realize no one's even home.

"I'm starting to think you actually want them to find out. I have something for you, too, but I didn't put it in your locker because of exactly what happened with this," Will says, holding up the card. “Risky behavior from you, sir.” Mike mumbles something that sounds like maybe I do, then comes around to open the passenger door.

The decision to keep their relationship private was mutual, but largely based around Mike’s worries about how his sexuality might impact his relationship with his family, which is more than understandable. Mike knows how he feels about Will, and that’s what matters the most—everything else, Will is perfectly fine being patient with.

"You never said whether you accept or decline," Mike recalls, eyebrows arched in a question.

"What?" Will asks dumbly, head foggy from all the kissing. He takes Mike's outstretched hand, pulling himself out of the car.

"Will you be my valentine?" Mike proposes again, eyes wide and awaiting a response.

"I'd want nothing more," Will replies, raising onto his toes to press a kiss to Mike's cheek. "And I love you too. Now let’s go inside so I can show you your card. I used watercolor," Will starts, bouncing on his heels in excitement.

Mike pulls him through the garage door and up to his room. It's so simple, loving and being loved by Mike. That's probably why the party hasn't noticed anything—not much has changed, really. The kissing is new, and the excessive hand-holding anytime they can get away with it, and saying that they love each other, yeah. But they've always given each other gifts, and had specified Will and Mike time that the other boys knew not to intrude on, back before things got complicated and they realized that wasn't the most normal thing for teenage boys to do.

For the most part, being with Mike feels like the most natural thing in the world, and Will finally understands how much it means to want to dedicate an entire day to celebrating that.

[respectthepetty]

Naughty Babe, who is Le Ling?!

I watched the Naughty Babe finale and had no idea who Le Ling was; therefore, I have to be annoyingly cringe about it, but before I begin, let me just say that Max looked delicious the entire eight episodes.

But also, this Daddy did too! And I'm not talking about Aon. No! Yi's father has been looking like an entire five-course meal every single time he appeared on the screen. This is the type of father that if your partner was acting up, forget about effing the friends. EFF THE DADDY! Sir, why are you looking so scrumdiliumcious? Is it all that money? Or is it the power? Perhaps it's you in red. Rawr!

Hand over heart, this entire family could get it. Mom included.

I gotta focus! The kids were in the playroom planning shenanigans.

This is a boy who gets it. I've always loved that his name is Syn because he sins but prays about it. Repents while he is doing it but still does it. Makes his sinful peeps pray too for good measure. We're not going to hell on his watch!

Lian not stopping Diao is funny because all throughout Cutie Pie, Yi would call Lian and be like, "your boy's at the club, but I'm only here to collect my man who I have 24-hour surveillance on, so sucks to be your trusting ass, but I'm built different, so I hope you get to your man on time before some serious shit goes down. Toodles!" These two are the pettiest friends, and I love my ghost ship.

POPPY! Where were you all season?! Hopefully filming Love Puzzle, so I can see you kiss a homie, but I was glad to see the secretaries in love and as chaotic as ever . . . in red.

Look at that face! That is a man trying to get all these heathens into the next life, YET THEY WON'T WORK WITH HIM! I guess the honeymoon will be in hell, Nuer!

This dog looked adorable, in red. So glad Domundi switched it out from the Cutie Pie dog. A+ casting choice.

This boat showing up was unnecessary! Was this supposed to be a rainbow moment because a high speed boat thingy coming out of nowhere was not the move?!

This blue color was even depressing Diao out. Get some yellow or orange back on my boy's body, NOW!

Look how vibrant that red ring box looked! LOOK AT IT! The ring looked really pretty with that red watch Diao was sporting too.

Red and white rose petals? They wasn't even married yet. Save them for the actual ceremony. Wasting expensive confetti. And the kissing too. Didn't have sex all this time, now they can't stop. Geesh!

I know this is tied into Chinese tradition and Yi's family being Chinese, but YI IS A RED RASCAL!

And leading up to this wedding, there had been so much blue to represent Diao's family being the hindrance to their love, and now this entire wedding was red to represent Yi and his family and Diao becoming a part of his family, and

Y'ALL CAN'T TELL ME NOTHING!

Then to have the gold dragons which represent Yi's family but are also Diao's color.

Y'ALL CAN'T TELL ME SHIT!

I'm in heaven. I do not care what the plot was. I do not care about the fake amnesia. I do not care about how the dog attack turned into a tiger attack. NO ME IMPORTA! Diao called out his father in front of all those rich ass people and God while wearing his man's color, and I'm living for it!

Kuea is a Red Rascal too, and I appreciated this public service announcement.

Diao sucked his thumb (😑), then they fucked, yet my color demon eyes only saw red candles. Thank you, props department!

Makorn asking if Diao wants a new husband (yes, sir. YOU!) while Yi wore red with that product placement red drink . . . *Mwah!* This blue table cloth gotta go though!

Red over Diao's heart, but that damn blue is still there! Diao, where is your yellow and orange, my man?! DONDE?! Oh yeah, they have kids with little rainbow toys. Good for them.

Hold on, was I supposed to remember this little girl? Diao was talking about her like I should know her. Who dafuq Le Ling?

Even this baby was confused. Who is this chick? Girl, for reals, who is you?! This feels like Buffy the Vampire Slayer's fifth season when Dawn was introduced. Like I KNOW I ain't seen this chica before.

Well . . . she's part of the family now, so good for her.

All in all, YI IS A RED RASCAL, and marriage equality will come to Thailand no later than 2026.

And same-sex partners will legally be able to adopt by 2029.

Naughty Babe, Cutie Pie, and Domundi said it with their full chest, and Apollo is gonna cosign it with his bouncy red ball because Red Rascals may not like each other, but they love to cause havoc when least expected, so . . . fuck it up, sis!

Amen.

[wormdebut]

Part One | Part Two | Part Three

THANK YOU FOR YOUR PATIENCE WITH ME ✨ ENJOY - “I missed him, seriously? You two boneheads got to see him? That’s a cruel joke and I for one am not having a good time, in these hallowed walls.” Eddie was pressed. It was five-thirty in the morning on a god damned Saturday and Maxine was being insufferable.

“I thought you said pretty boy was shy! I for one thought he was endearingly feisty.” Max tossed her hip into Eddies side and she shuffled behind him to get espresso from the back.

Eddie let out a quick laugh, “Are you sure we are talking about the same pretty boy? My pretty boy? He said all of ten words, maybe. But god, he blushes so pretty.”

“Steve Harrington, right?” Max called from the back as Eddie was finishing setting up his beloved pastry display. The fluffy blueberry muffins were looking especially fruity this morning, and Eddie was ecstatic. He absolutely dropped one on the floor at that though.

“He has a last name? You know his last name? How the hell did you pull that off Mayfield?” Max had the beans tucked up against her shoulder as she crouched down to grab the fallen muffin, “Jeez Ed, you don’t have to throw things to get what you want. I asked him to join our new loyalty program. You know we need a first name, last name, phone number, sexual orientation, et cetera et cetera.”

Eddie stood frozen with the stupid floor muffin, “Sexual orien—what?” He shook his head to snap out of it, “Did you say phone number? Maxine Evelyn Mayfield, did you con my pretty boy out of his precious phone number—” He finally tossed the poor muffin into the trash and grabbed the beans out of his current favorite employees hands, pouring them into the machine hopper, “For little ol’ me?” He fluttered his eyes at her and she swatted at him to get him to absolutely cut that shit out.

“Of course I did, you flaming homosexual idiot.” Eddie loved Max, she was a sister to him really, and he never saw himself as someone that would get to have more family than just his uncle Wayne. He loved Wayne deeply, but Max had started working at the grind as soon as she turned sixteen, came out to him as bisexual within the same year and they had been inseparable since.

“You flatter me Red, you truly do, gimme gimme gimme the goods.”

“Calm down, Edward. Let us get the store open and then I’ll tell you what you want to know, Capiche?”

Eddie groaned as he walked away, “Come on Maxine, at least I call you by your government name. You know Edward isn’t even that.”

She laughed again, “Forgive me, Edison.”

——

“Max, why does our fearless leader keep staring out the window like he’s waiting for someone to return home from a year long journey?” Erica was not the only one that noticed Eddie peering out into the street with eyes wide like he was a kid that lost his mom at the grocery store. Max and Erica were settled at either machine and Eddie had blown through all the guest orders in the lobby, hoping to see the current object of his affections but he had had no luck.

“Because he’s waiting for his flavor of the week to return from the Abercrombie cataloger he seemingly walked out of.”

Erica huffed out a laugh, shaking her head as she muttered a brief ‘hopeless’ under her breath.

Eddie Munson wasn’t one to get caught up on any specific man, no. He kept his options open and certainly was not the dating type, not since—he just wasn’t a relationship guy. There was something about Steve though. Was he being irrational, having only seen the man once? Abso-fucking-lutely he was, but Eddie didn’t care. He knew the people around this city, he knew which regulars he could take out for a drink, he knew who not to talk to. Steve was new, and Steve was cute. So cute.

The business was slow for a Saturday, Eddie certainly didn’t mind. He was distracted. After checking on the girls, he ducked away to the back to pull his phone out. Max had given him the sticky note that had ‘Steve Harrington’ written on it, in surprisingly neat cursive with a number underneath. He was willing to get Max whatever she wanted, after the little stunt she pulled. The ‘Loyalty Program’, god Red was genius.

Eddie: So, I’ve got some good news, and I’ve got some bad news. Always gotta go with the bad first so, Max may or may not have lied about the loyalty program. My uncle is fairly old fashioned so we don’t subscribe to that kind of thing, but the good news is I get to shoot my shot, so drinks tonight, maybe? I know a couple cool places in the area if your interested?

Eddie sure as shit wasn’t shy and he wasn’t going to pretend to be. He smirked to himself as he sent the text off, but the smirk was just as quickly dropped when he realized he didn’t even say who he was.

Eddie: Shit! This is Eddie, by the way, the manager at The Daily Grind? I honestly can’t get you out of my head, to the point that my team stepped in, so like I said, this is me shooting my shot - E

Because business was slower than usual, Eddie’s day was slow as hell. The customers were an even mix of lovely and absolute hellions. One woman asked him to blend a drip coffee with ice? He did it of course, but he sure as fuck did not want to. A gentleman tried to snap at Max and she handled it fairly well on her own, but Eddie was waiting in the wings for her signal.

One-thirty couldn’t have come sooner. Eddie absolutely beamed as his beloved best friend and assistant manager for all intents and purposes blew in with her hair up in a bouncy high pony-tail, “Eddie Baby!” she cheered and she threw her arms around his neck with a airy laugh.

“Chrissy Angel!” Eddie smiled into her obnoxiously high pony tail, “Did you catch Henderson in the parking lot?”

“Yeah he was just pulling in. Day go okay?”

Chrissy Cunningham was bubbly and fierce. Eddie absolutely adored her. She followed behind Eddie as he sauntered into the back to catch her up. He wished her well, greleted Dustin as he made his way in. Erica was set to stay with them for the next few hours, but Chris and Dustn would be fine to close up by six.

Eddie walked Max to her car, and nothing short of cackled when she wished him well with his ‘lover boy’.

“Haven’t heard from him yet, Red, but you know I will keep you updated.” She waved him goodbye as she slid into her car. Eddie found his motorcycle, that he had parked by the back door and found himself lost in thought as he drove home.

Eddie really wasn’t a relationship guy. He was twenty-three and had had one relationship, Devon had been great. He had been. They had been together for two years, Eddie was eighteen and fresh out of high school, Devon was there for Eddie when he needed affection, when he needed someone to need him. Devon was older than Eddie, twenty-two when they started dating and he had clung to Eddie, it was unhealthy at the end. The facade Devon had put on had melted away, and it just—Eddie was snapped out of his thoughts as he parked in his apartment complex. His phone trilled and he couldn’t stop the smile that spread across his face when he saw the text from ‘Shy Boy Stevie’.

Steve: Hey! Sorry to get back to you so late. Rob and I are still unpacking our apartment. I am not at all familiar with the area yet but would really love to see you again. Where do you want to meet?

Eddie: Excellent. Meet me at Bauman’s on Braker Street at 8? It’s a date sweet thing. - E

-

Taglist - @gay-stranger-things @savory-babby @trashpocket @itsfreakingbats @steddiereid @lovelyscot @booksandsience @breealtair @nightmareglitter @misty-inferno @dazedandinked @child-of-cthulhu @bookworm0690 @martzja @exhibit-no-restraint @imzadidragonfly @live-the-fangirl-life @sidebarre @bejeweledbaby @stucksolangelo @eboyawstenn @daisyellsong @biatcgh @vampireinthesun @bestwifehaver @whatthemeepever @maya-custodios-dionach @krazyperson @crowned-with-stars @be-the-spark-bitch @blisschaoss @swimmingbirdrunningrock @braveangel777 @thequeervibes @eastern-wind @5ammi90 @justsomefunshit @perseus-notjackson @literallyjustarat @malachitedevil @gothwifehotchner @lifeisnotsobadonceyoustopcaring @walkingaftermidnight07 @jade-joltz13 @boop369 @thegingerrapunzel @grtwdtsmwhr @angeldreamsoffanfic @stevesbipanic @kitt3ntales @micheledawn1975

if you wanna be added or removed just let me know ✨

[corneliushickey]

12 + 13?

12. list three ships you currently love

beetlejuice/lydia has occupied the whole of my brain heart and dick for two months now i am 10k into the ROUGH DRAFT of what was supposed to be a quick little oneshot pwp to post for halloween timothy burton you deranged fucking lunatic how did you manage to make me angrier than i have ever been in my entire life while also making my fucking dreams come true drop dead i mean it and also i owe you my life

sue/elisabeth from the substance but not in a traditional sense i guess!! there are people in the tag writing very sweet may/december sapphic age gap fix it fics and i spent a month writing about elisabeth molesting sue's dead body because i have never seen such a captivating, painful, horrific portrayal of self hatred on film it changed me for real

baby/otis because i just rewatched TDR with my friend and kept being like "oh my god did you see how in love they looked in that 0.2 second shot 🥹🥺" and it just made me remember again how in love they are in every 0.2 second shot... they really portray such a realistic bickering sibling relationship and then the sexual electricity with which baby says "or is my 𝓫𝓲𝓰 𝓫𝓻𝓸𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓻 gonna have to knock your fuckin' teeth outta yer head?" could start an irl chemical fire in your room if you aren't careful as could otis' "hoss, are you... staring at my 𝓼𝓲𝓼𝓽𝓮𝓻 and thinkin' bad thoughts? well, why not? you a faggot?"

13. list 5 OTPs from past fandoms

hannigram 5ever i'm extremely burnt out on the fandom and tend to experience a very specific type of source creep where i only remember the trash shit fanon version of will that exists on tumblr so i have to rewatch the show to remember that he is a dour, curt, cold, rude, isolated man who deserves every last ounce of hannibal's attention

joe/people eater/kalishnikov from mad max i am VERY serious about the warlord polycule that was and is real... the amount of lore i dreamed up for them in 2015 you would not believe the kind of work i was putting in

i'm gonna include a 3-for-one here but quark/odo garak/bashir kira/jadzia from ds9 which i genuinely do think are canon in a way that is fundamental to the series

on that note q/picard from tng which i also believe genuinely was canon and which from my unserstanding was like for real cemented as actual explicit canon in the picard series because all i do is win

house/wilson dude that fucking ship broke something deep within me at an extremely young and impressionable age i know this entire site went through its little house md renaissance and everyone loves to use the phrase "gay and homophobic" but unless you were an overtly dykey twelve year old living in a 24/7 fox news tea party household while that fucking thing was on air i need you to sit down and shut up because you would NOT get it

[meteor752]

Episode 6 and 7 thoughts

This will now be a regular thing

Also im writing this as I go

Episode 6

So Izzy thought Ed was Roach. Huh. Does he and Roach talk regularly? <- Coming from a Rizzy shipper

“Do weeeee?” Fang I love you

Oh my god, Frenchie and Jim coming to Ed and Stede like they’re kids asking if their cousins can sleep over

The crew going shoppiiiiiiiiing!!!

Frenchie’s lil dancey dance added many years to my life

Ed being nice and giving kids mon- oh never mind, oh that’s a knife okay. Ed never have kids please

“Don’t pirate kids” well listen okay I don’t have HBO Max it’s the only way I can watch this show

MY QUEEN

Wee John you’re so beautiful and amazing and we don’t deserve you

Jim’s lil mustache, like yeah me too <- Non-Binary person

Stede looks so happy about seeing Wee John!! He’s so proud of his son!

Izzy is gorgeous. I’m actually so happy to see him explore more sides of himself, and to find things he can indulge in. This whole season has really just been Izzy’s big therapy arc

His hair makes him look a bit like Cinderella’s evil stepmother though

Oh he can sing too! Izzy!!! <- A person who did not like Izzy in season one

Wee John X Izzy? Roach X Fang?

YO THE

POLYCULE DANCING?!

Ed protecting Stede….just, immediately putting him behind himself…I just…

I rewatched that clip five times

“Because I only hang out with cool pirates” Stede’s face!!! He’s just like Oh Snapppp

Despite it all, Stede and Ed are still the cutest couple that has ever graced the TV screen. Like hell yeah, make fun of people together!

Ed keeps being protective…..okay I need a moment…

Roach you’re a lunatic and I love you

“Whatever this is it’s just gonna turn me on” Izzy you’re a shining star

Also I just now noticed that Black Pete and Lucius aren’t there. I’m guessing they eloped somewhere and are currently taking care of their adopted cat

Nope okay, literally the second I unpaused there they are. That’s the worst timing

Hell yeah my dudes, I hope you broke whatever bed you used

“I’m just doing it for the lolz” Yeah that’s sounds like something someone from the 1700s would say

I know this is a pirate ship but why do they just have so many knives and swords laying about

Who is this fanged torture queen, and how do I acquire her number?

Stede remains best employer, while Aziraphale is the best landlord. Can these two people just run the world please and thank you

Hell Cat Maggie is my soulmate

I feel like there needs to be a pirate workers union

The crew of the revenge is the best found family of all time

Stede Bonnet can rival Steven Universe in reforming villains, like he’s just such a genuinely nice dude

“Alright gang! Let’s talk profit sharing”

Oh protective Stede, alright let’s go mate defend your mans

Okay but why is Stede kinda 👀 in this scene

Oh Stede, love…

OH THEY FAWHKING

That French? Izzy speaks french?

I want to see that man get dicked down

I guess the revenge now has a pet goat

Episode 7

Okay Ed is a soft boy again, aight

NO NOT THE LEATHER JACKET

The anime toast in mouth thing. He’s officially been baby girl for a long while, but we’re really solidifying it

OH THEY FUCKED

Isn’t there an anime where a mob boss becomes a house wife? Yeah that’s Ed

Oh we’re telling him about the mermaid fantasy, okay

Izzy what the fuck, you’re amazing

“He’s jealous” my darling

The polycule is going strong, and I love the absolute lack of jealousy. This is the best representation I have ever had

Oh they’re going on a date! That’s so sweet actually

It’s really sweet that they’re talking about their time apart

Stede’s famous now? Good for him!

I need to stop falling in love with every pirate lady In this show. That being said, I hope we see more of the fangirl lady

I’m reinforcing my claim that Stede and Ed are cuter than anything that has ever been on screen

OH MY GOD SWEDE

The Söt Och Saftig, my love. Also this far in and this is the first time the character “The Swede” actually says something in Swedish

Scammer Frenchie is back in business, love that

Jim and Archie trying to get their boyfriend set up is very sweet actually

The character development of Izzy going from wanting Ed to remain “Blackbeard” to him saying if being a softie makes him happy then he should do that, like I get it now, I know why you all love this man

OH MY FUCKING GOD STEDE

Can’t believe Stede is an official Slut now

Open communication? Like genuine conversation about their relationship, and the pace they’re taking it? Ed being honest that he’s not ready for the steps they’re taking in their relationship?

What is this argument

I live for Lucius and Black Pete’s nicknames for each other

“I’ve only known you for a few hours Bonnet, but I’d fucking die for ya” Same random dude. Same

Izzy🥹

Zheng and Olu are really cute actually

Oh my god the polycule will end my fucking life

DONT BRING ED INTO THIS ZHENG

“That was really mean” YOU TELL HER STEAK KNIFE

Protective Jim my beloved

Oh my god

Roach and Fang friendship?

Roach is the queen of self care

[ultimate-shipper-trash-blog]

Pt.9

For the first time in her life Lydia shut up.

She was sitting in the middle of the room while everyone else was frantic around her.

"How can this happen? How does he even know she exists!"

"He must be in our minds that's it!"

"He wasn't supposed to come till 1995. We had time!"

"Yeah well obviously we don't!"

"I don't care about the facts I want my daughter safe!"

The room is silent.

"Oh my god." Dustin is the first to start.

"Your daughter?!" Lucas squeaks.

Eddie raises his hand. "Yeah um, mine too."

"WHAT!" Mike roars.

Robin is giggling, Nancy is shaking her head while smiling. Everyone else looks generally unsurprised.

"Relax dipshit," Max says. "People have children all the time, including gay people. No big deal."

"Well it's just-"

"If you think Steve ending up with Eddie is the biggest surprise and not that there's a time traveler in your living room you're even stupider than I thought. I can't be the only one who thought they were already dating." Everyone else nods their head in agreement and that seems to be the end of that.

"Back to planning," Nancy starts. "Lydia knows how the first round went. If Vecna knows everything we've discussed then you can't know anything else. We have to treat this as a two-way camera. Only the bare bones."

"But I can help!" Lydia argues.

"No Lydia, you've already told us everything you know. You are no longer a part in this plan. For your safety and ours."

The two engage in a staring contest. Lydia is the first to break away with a huff. Leaving the room in a flurry.

Eddie trails after her.

"Hey! Wait up!"

He finds her outside on the porch, her face in her knees. He sits next to her giving her room to breathe.

"What's going on munchkin?"

"I'm no use to anyone! I don't even know why I'm here. I'm useless. This is life or death and I'm only in the way, I'm a hazard."

"No babe that's not true. You didn't ask to get possessed by the scary wizard man did you? That stupid bastard. He won't hurt you. I won't let him."

Understanding seems to pass on her face but she doesn't say anything.

"Let's go back inside huh?"

"Yeah."

---

When they go inside Lydia pulls Nancy aside. "Can I talk to you? I know why I was brought here."

---

"Ok so the plan is," Nancy has a large sheet of paper on the table, she has little monopoly pieces representing everyone and a large marked she's drawing little connecting lines with. Lydia and Eddie were sent to do something, anything but be involved. Eddie would get caught up later. He didn't want to miss the chance to babysit his daughter.

"El will be our manpower. The kids will be sent to the Creel house to burn the body like we did." She gestures to Steve and Robin. "This time he won't get a chance to heal."

Robin and Steve are looking at her for their next instructions. "Robin you're with me. Steve, you and Eddie watch over Lydia. All she has to do is stand there and try to summon him."

Steve crosses the room in anger. "My daughter will not be bait!"

"Steve," Robin puts a hand on his chest. "Babe you know as well as I do that it's the only way to get him here."

Steve won't stop. "Why do we have to chase him down?! Huh?! Aren't we speeding up the timeline? Shouldn't we wait for him to find us?"

Nancy shakes her head at him. "Steve. He nearly killed us once on his time. This time we have an upper hand. Do you really want to see what he's like when he's had time to plan? To put Lydia in more danger?"

"You know I'd never-"

"Then trust me...it's the only way."

---

All chapters will be posted today!!!! Woo-hoo! Maybe I'll wait till tomorrow to post the epilogue idk.

Tag:

@tinyplanet95 @jaytriesstrangerthings @bookworm0690

[chaoscradle]

assigning GUTS songs to stranger things characters (i know this has been done a ton of times already but i'm doing it anyway):

all-american bitch: nancy

"I know my age and I act like it"

"I'm a perfect all-american bitch"

"I know my place, I know my place, and this is it"

"I'm the eternal optimist, I scream inside to deal with it"

"I pay attention to things most people ignore"

(el could also work with this one, but i felt like with the whole nuclear family thing the wheelers have going on that nancy fits better)

bad idea right?: max

"'I only see him as a friend' the biggest lie I ever said"

"can't two people reconnect?"

"but god, when I look at you, my brain goes 'ah', can't hear my thoughts"

vampire: joyce

"every girl I talked to told me you were bad, bad news"

"you're so convincing, how do you lie without flinching?"

"I've made some real big mistakes, but you make the worst one look fine"

"the way you sold me for parts"

"you said it was true love, but wouldn't that be hard? you can't love anyone, 'cause that would mean you had a heart"

"I loved you truly. gotta laugh at the stupidity"

lacy: el

"I linger all the time, watchin', hidden in plain sight"

"aren't you the sweetest thing on this side of hell?"

"I feel your compliments like bullets on skin"

"and I despise my jealous eyes and how hard they fell for you"

ballad of a homeschooled girl: mike

"and I hate all my clothes, feels like my skin doesn't fit right over my bones"

"the party's done, and I'm no fun, I know I know, I know, I know"

"I made it weird, I made it worse"

"everything I do is tragic"

"I'm shocked I'm still alive"

(this could also work for robin tbh)

making the bed: mike

"another perfect moment that doesn't feel like mine, another thing I forced to be a sign"

"push away all the people who know me the best"

"every good thing has turned into something I dread"

"and I tell someone I love them, just as a distraction"

logical: will (psa this is from will's pov i don't think any of this of mike)

"come for me like a savior, and I'd put myself through hell for you"

"and I fell for you like rain falls from a February sky, but now the current's stronger and I couldn't get out if I tried"

"oh, why do I do this? I look so stupid thinking two plus two equals five, and I'm the love of your life"

"'cause if rain don't pour and sun don't shine, then changing you is possible"

"you lied, you lied, you lied"

"I guess love is never logical"

"the sky is green, the grass is red, and you mean all those words you said"

"I know I'm half responsible, and that makes me feel horrible"

"I know I could've stopped it all, god why didn't I stop it all?"

"'cause loving you is loving every argument you held over my head"

get him back!: max (NOT about lumax, just how she'd handle a different breakup)

"I want sweet revenge, I want him again"

"do I love him? do I hate him? I guess it's up and down"

"I wanna make him really jealous, I wanna make him feel bad"

"I wanna break his heart, then be the one to stitch it up"

"I wanna meet his mom, just to tell her her son sucks"

love is embarrassing: will

"and then, you kissed some girl from high school"

"waited by my phone like a goddamn fool"

"god, love's embarrassing as hell"

"and I consoled you while you cried over your ex-girlfriend's new guy" (minus the new guy part)

"you found a new version of me"

"I give up, I give up, but I keep comin' back for more"

the grudge: lucas

"how could anyone do the things you did so easily?"

"I try to be tough, I try to be mean, but even after all this, you're still everything to me, and I know you don't care, I guess that's fine"

"one phone call from you and my entire world was changed"

"and I doubt you ever think about the damage that you did, but I hold onto every detail like my life depends on it"

"and I know in my heart, hurt people hurt people"

(this song doesn't 100% represent lucas and max's relationship in s4 imo but it comes the closest)

pretty isn't pretty: el

"there's always something in the mirror that I think looks wrong"

"when pretty isn't pretty enough, what do you do?"

"I could change up my body and change up my face, I could try every lipstick in every shade, but I'd always feel the same"

"fix the thing you hated, and you'd still feel insecure"

"I chased some dumb ideal my whole fucking life, and none of it matters and none of it ends"

teenage dream: will

"they all say that it gets better, it gets better, but what if I don't?"

"when am I gonna stop being wise beyond my years and just start being wise?"

"I'll blow out the candles, happy birthday to me" (birthdaygate)

"but I fear that they already got all the best parts of me"

"will I spend all the rest of my years wishin' I could go back?"